#and it’s my 25th which feels big I guess

[samgiddings]

having a weekend bday in august has a weird amount of problems

[natigail]

"I think, as you may have clocked in the show, from a period of time when I was feeling a certain way. It was towards the end of 2021, early 2022, where I was a bit, like, I need to do something. I have been on this hiatus, there has been a literal pandemic, the vibes are not amazing, and so I very much was like, I want to... Look. With Basically I'm Gay, I wrote myself out of the closet. Right? I used the hell that my career has trapped me in as an obligatory way to force my hand to rip the plaster off and confront my sexuality. Which was a good thing! Without all of you, without the internet, who knows? I might be in the closet, being a sad lawyer right now. Legitimately. And it was kind of the same thing here. I was, like, I want to just start creating a piece of entertainment and then maybe I'll entertain myself out of a hole. And if I go on a tour, then I'll get to touch grass. I'll get to smell the fresh air of Chicago, Illinois and wherever the fuck. I guess Helsinki had fresh air. Shout out to Europe. Ehm, and yeah. It was literally like a self-fulfilling prophecy, right? It was like writing the show and doing the show was the thing that I needed and here we are!" - Dan Howell, post-live premiere of we’re all doomed, 25th of February 2024

BIG and WAD are both such incredible things and I am emotional about the fact that he can sort out something so complex and private through sharing it with his audience.

Quotes from Dan (150/?)

[diaconicon]

Could you write a connor stoll x daughter of Athena reader. Where connor watches the reader and another person do romantic kareoke and he gets jelous because he think the reader likes that person.

⬆️This was an anonymous ask, which I unfortunately lost because I accidently deleted it😭 I'm so sorry to whoever requested this, I hope you still find it in some way!

All my Loving

connor stoll x daughterofathena! reader

Summary: basically what the request says, made it a bit christmassy because its in less than a week (2 days now), and i miss the spirit

Warnings: none (I think), probs ooc everyone. We're just gonna ignore the fact that the Camp has the barrier that stops it from raining inside okay? I kind of forgot don't hate me love you guys xoxo. English isn't my first language, so there could be some errors

22nd of December. It was almost Christmas, and Camp Half-Blood was in a fuss between Christmas decorations, some of the campers packing to go back to their families the day after for the Holiday, and the preparations for the 24th and 25th for the other campers who would stay, everyone had something to do and somewhere to be, not leaving a lot of free time to wish everyone goodbye and a Merry Christmas.

Here came the Hermes Cabin, as always, to 'save the day' - as said by its residents. They decided to host a karaoke night on the 22nd as a sort of pre-Christmas celebration, so everyone could also enjoy it with their friends who would go away the next day.

Of course, everyone was invited - although it was still a mystery how the Hermes Cabin was always capable of pulling out all these big parties without getting in trouble - but you were still debating on whether to go or not, not being the most social type, and definitely not very inclined to be singing, but after contemplating for some minutes, you decided to cave in and go. Most of your half-brothers and sisters wouldn't be there, but, after all, Connor did ask you personally to come, saying that 'you would really do him a favour' because 'everyone was just so boring and no fun to be around', and you just couldn't say no to him, you were, besides, quite fond of both him and his brother and it would be rude to just not go.

I mean, you wouldn't have to sing anyways if you didn't want to, right? You could just go, have fun with your friends, have a few drinks, watch other people sing and, most importantly, spend a bit of time with Connor before you went back home to your family for the holiday's.

Well, you were wrong. Almost everything was going perfectly. You arrived at the cabin, said hello to some of your friends, poured yourself a drink, and then, as planned, you went to search for Connor, who you found in a corner next to his brother, who scattered away (not without tripping at least a few times) almost immediately after greeting you with a quick "Oh hello there, how are you? Everything okay? Hope you're enjoying yourself. Oh, just a minute, will you? I think someone's calling me - and then turning to his brother - catch you later, Con."

And that left just you and Connor alone, in an awkward silence. Although you were usually so talkative with him, it really wasn't so hard to open up when he was around. He always let you feel so comfortable without even trying, you guessed it was in his demeanour, the way he walked, the way he acted, you didn't know exactly, but he definitely wasn't much of an awkward person as you were, quite confident of himself, but quieter than his brother, calmer, which made him more likable in your opinion. He was fun to be around, very animated, but when needed, he could also be very sensible and almost a shoulder to cry on. He was just so.. warm, almost like the sun, or an oven! You weren't sure how to put it, but he did really remind you of freshly baked cookies, who were still warm ones out of the oven, but that you had to wait for to cool down before eating, otherwise it would be 'bad' for your stomach (at least according to your dad).

But maybe it was something in the air that night, the music was really loud and you already could barely hear yourself over the others singing, maybe it was Travis' abrupt disappearance, but neither of you said a word, not even a 'hello' or a 'how are you?' After some seconds, what must have felt like minutes, you decided to be the first one to break the silence, then you saw that he too wanted to say something, and opting to let him take the word instead, you leaned in to hear him better. But just then, some of your other friends called you, wanting you to come sing with them and even after making it pretty clear that you had no intention whatsoever of participating, they still dragged you out to the karaoke section, pretty much forcing you to sing at this point. Maybe you were exaggerating - well, you were definitely exaggerating - but at that moment, it felt like being processed to death, tragically waiting for a guillotine to cut your head off.

You didn't know how it happened, but you ended up having to sing a duet with some Apollo boy you didn't even know well, although quite cute in your opinion, you couldn't even seem to recall his name.

Not quite as bad as you thought it would be, the song went by really fast, and you could even say you had fun. After chatting a bit with the Apollo kid, finally remembering his name, and him suggesting to spend more time together once in a while, having enjoyed himself, you bid goodbye and immediately went back to find Connor, still a bit embarrassed by the public scene, which you still wished to have avoided.

Though, not being able to find Connor anywhere, you decided to ask his brother if he had seen him.

"Connor? I think I saw him going outside just a few minutes ago. If you see him, tell him to come inside quickly, will you? It's like freezing out there, and I don't even think he took his coat with him"

You thanked Travis, grabbed Connor's coat, which he left in the cabin (by demand of his older brother), and went outside as well, hoping to catch up with the latter, wherever he went to.

Travis was right. It was indeed freezing, and in the time you spent in the Hermes Cabin, it also had begun to snow. Realising this, your heart couldn't help but to warm up a little. You absolutely loved snow, especially in this time of the year, only adding more to the Christmas spirit already strong around the Camp.

You eventually found Connor after a while near the beach, the sand now mixing with the snow that was falling, secretly thanking the Gods that he didn't go into the forest or it would've been probably impossible to find him.

He was sitting on a random trench, with his back to you, looking out in the distance, to the stars or the sea you didn't know which, still not having noticed your presence behind him.

So, you carefully went up to him, anxious of approaching, like reaching out for a baby deer who would otherwise get scared if you were too loud. Not only that, but you were also anxious about what to say. He looked upset, and you didn't know why. For how much you tried, you just couldn't think of what could've made him so distressed. Was it something you said? Well, you didn't exactly say anything... was that it? Did he expect you to have said something? Had he wanted to tell you something before you were dragged away by your friends? Maybe it was just the change in the weather that affected him so much. It was always pretty warm at Camp anyway. Maybe it was something that had been going on all day, and you just didn't know. You only first saw him this evening, and he already looked pretty off.

Whatever it could've been, you decided to just go and rip the band-aid off. You would've to ask him directly what was wrong, so you could try and help and comfort him.

You were now not even a few steps behind him, but he was still oblivious of you being there (sometimes you asked yourself how he was still alive with how bad his hearing and reflexes were), so you extended your hand towards him, the one with which you were holding his coat, and poked him on his shoulder, finally capturing his attention.

'Here, put it on, your brother is going to kill us both if you don't', you said, referring to the jacket, trying to relieve some of the tension around the air.

He didn't protest and grabbed the jacket, but he still didn't say anything and turned away immediately, his face impassable.

You set next to him, and for a while, just looked at him, not saying anything. Anxiety filled your stomach up to the point you thought you were going to feel sick. He didn't look only upset anymore but actually mad. Angry. And you were so scared it had to do with something you did. In the fraction of time you used to contemplate on what to say and how to start the conversation you were clearly about to have, he beat you to it and started first.

'Well, thanks for the coat. You can go back now if you'd like', he said, irritated, not once looking at your direction but keeping his eyes fixed on a vanishing point which you still couldn't figure out.

'Is something wrong? You know if something happened you can just tell me, I'm here to help you you know. Just.. please, I don't like to see you like this. You know if it's something I did, I'm sorry, I didn't realise. But just tell me, okay? I'm so sorry if I hurt you in any way.' You were desperate at this point, just hoping this would end soon. You'd never seen Connor this upset, and it quite frankly scared you a bit.

But just then, his gaze softened. He just couldn't stay mad at you, not like this, not seeing how much stress this caused you. He wasn't even mad at you. He could never be mad at you, not even if his life depended on it, he thought.

'No, I'm sorry, okay. Really. Just forget about it, I'm overreacting. It's nothing'. Although his voice was sincere, he felt like he needed to say more than that, much more, if he wanted to make it better. 'Look.. it's just that.. well. Just give me a moment, will you? I need to think of how to say this right.' It was now his turn to feel anxious, and he started picking at everything he could find to keep calm. His nails, the wood on the trench you two were sitting on, the zipper of his jacket, and so on.

You weren't doing much better, shaking your legs up and down, picking at the skin of your lips, and basically dying of anxiety. If you were exaggerating before, now you definitely weren't. You would've preferred the guillotine over this at any moment.

'Yes, of course, take all the time that you need. I'm here for you.'

And after that, it fell silent. The only sound you could hear were the waves of the sea and the snow falling on the both of you, and in the distance, a bit of the long forgotten party going on in the Hermes Cabin. You were now only waiting for Connor to start speaking. You wanted to say patiently, but it was eating you up inside.

A few minutes went by, and you couldn't take it anymore. You were about to say something before he beat you to it again.

'Okay, so this isn't going to be easy to say, but I want you to listen to me until I'm done. Please. I know I'm not the best speaker in the world, and I really did want to make this more worthy of you, more meaningful, but I'm probably gonna mess things up, so I'm sorry in advance, but just try and listen, okay?' He began, carefully, and you just nodded, following his instruction and waiting for him to continue.

'Okay so, well, I thought this was honestly kind of obvious already - he said this with a smile - but I really like you, and I mean really, since at least a few years I think already. And seeing you with that Apollo kid, I don't know it just made me mad, I thought I couldn't stand a chance against someone like that, so much more talented and what not than me. And not only him, I mean everyone. You're just so perfect in every sense, and I know you could do so much better than me, so I got a bit self-conscious, but that's it. I'm so sorry for worrying you. It really wasn't my intention to be such a dick, but my emotions got the better of me.'

You were left speechless. You really didn't know what to say. Not even a sound could come out of your mouth at that point. Luckily, it didn't have to because Connor went on before you could even think of anything to say.

'No, wait, don't say anything yet. I'm not finished. I want to say it better. This is definitely not how I imagined this. You know I made up so many speeches in my head, practising on what I would tell you if ever came the right moment. But I forgot all of them now, so I'll just have to figure something out,

'I am every second more infatuated by your presence, by your kindness, your beauty. You leave me without breath every time that I see you, and every time, just a bit more than the day before. Every time I look up at the stars, I'm reminded of you, perplexed on how the Gods didn't take you as the inspiration of such creations. Every time I look up at the moon, I can't think of anything else other than how your beauty surpasses even hers, how the reflection of the moonlight on the water isn't just an allegory of you. Because it's something so beautiful that you just can't take your eyes off it. How honey isn't scraped directly from your voice because it's even more sweet and warm than a cup of tea. You fill me with joy of which I've never experienced before, which I didn't even know was real. I'm at every second more and more confused on how all of nature doesn't revolve around you, on how it wasn't created for you and because of you, for at every thing I look at I am every constant reminded of you. If I ever was to meet Aphrodite, I know she would take your appearance and, although I can't dare say you are more beautiful than her or you know what would happen, I can say that in this world and all the universe you are one of the Gods' most beautiful creations. That if it weren't for Prometheus, I would steal the fire just for you, and you only, to keep you warm from days like this one. To keep you warm like you do constantly to me, by just your mere presence, by just an insignificant conversation you could have with me, which I hold dear forever and never forget. What I'm trying to say is that I don't only like you, no... no. I would hold up the sky full of stars and galaxies for you, I would go up to the moon to retrieve your lost items for you, even just to see your smile, to see you happy, to know that you are content. For you have already stolen my soul and hold my heart, I couldn't sell it to the devil, but I would, just to let him promise me to always keep you safe, that nothing could ever touch or hurt you. For you only I think and plan, for you only I ever want to live on. I love you, I really do, and I only hope for you to love me back at your own pace and time. But I could never force you to do anything. If you don't reciprocate my feelings, let's forget about this. Just go on with our daily lives. A simple no, or just a shake of your head, will silence me forever, I won't ever bother you again, I promise. But if there's even just one chance, a little bit of hope that you could give me a try, please don't let me wait for too long. Because how I am to take even one second longer of this I do not know.'

And with this, he stopped talking. He went completely mute, now only waiting for your answer, for a little hope.

But you didn't know what to say, how could after such a speech, such a confession? Anything you would say, even if meaningful, would never compete to something such beautiful and utterly captivating as this.

So you opted for saying exactly that.

'Connor.. I.. I'm really speechless, I don't know what to say, no, everything I would say could never compete with what you just did. I'm so sorry, but I really don't know how to own up to that.' You said with the biggest smile you ever had, which started growing since Connor began to speak.

'No, don't worry about that, just tell me, please. A yes or a no would be sufficient enough.' The poor boy was so stressed, but you couldn't help but laugh. It wasn't you mocking him or anything like that. It was a genuinely happy laugh, like you've never had before. He also started laughing at this, being influenced by you.

'Stop laughing, I'm serious. You're making me sweat cold here.' He said, finally lighting up from his serious stance.

'I'm so sorry, but I just really can't see how you could've become this worked up only because I was singing Last Christmas with some guy. Like, really, from all the songs Last Christmas, that's not even classifiable as a real love song.' At this point, you just couldn't stop laughing, completely captivated, almost not being able to breathe anymore.

'Hey! That's not true. It's one of the greatest love songs ever written. And I'm honestly quite offended you didn't sing it with me, okay. You know how much I love Wham!' Saying this, he also kicked your leg playfully. Finally, the mood was completely lightened up. Now, the interaction being like one of the many you had every day.

'Okay, now on a serious note', you began, and you could see Connor tensing up again, 'yes. And a million times, yes. I really like you, Connor, and I've had probably since I came to this camp. I could even say that I love you too.. but maybe for that, I do need a bit of time. But I do want to give it a try, and more than one if need to. Just don't make anything like that up anymore. Otherwise, I'd just look like a bad girlfriend, okay? I can't even come up with a good speech to convince my dad to let me adopt a cat, even think of confessing my undying love for you. I just think I need a little bit more time than you, but I'll get there eventually, I promise. Just wait until you'll get a Jane Austen type letter under your pillow.' You finally said, as sincere as you could. You were truly so happy, and you think you've never been this happy ever in your life (at least not until your dad would finally cave in and let you get a cat).

Connor, too, was happy. Oh, so happy, he thought he could break out in some type of dance right there and walk up to the sky to get a handful of stars to gift to you. But that was impossible, so he opted to wrap an arm around you and let you rest your head on his shoulder.

And like that, you stayed for a while, just you two together under the snow looking up at the stars and into the horizon.

'Don't worry, if we ever move in together, we're gonna adopt not one cat, but at least twenty, be sure of that.' He said.

Okayy this is it! I really hope you like this. omg, it came out so much longer than I was expecting. Also im so sorry it took so long to write but I was really busy with school! Also im honestly very happy about the ending. Hope you guys like it!

[faroreskiss]

still open for angsty requests? how about this?

reader has a crush on Sky, like they fell fucking downstairs for the guy and it's impossible for them to get back up, the problem? Sun is his partner

i left this request pretty open on purpose, you can make it hurt and comfort, hurt no comfort, you can make it LU or exclusively SkSw, do whatever you want with the prompt!

Hey Anon, this is from almost a year ago, holy shit.

BUT HERE IT IS! I ACTUALLY DID IT!!

It is very angsty (imo), so I hope if anybody sees it, they... enjoy? Not sure what type of warnings I should put on this as it is NOT NSFW, but still a bit heavy.

Also fits a bit with the September vibes I guess.

The Pioneer Ao3

CW: Raw non proof read text, angst, possibly no comfort.

Can be read as LU Sky or SkySw Link. Mention of the Chain but not super relevant. Thank you @beyondtheglowingstars for reminding me and pushing my inspiration for this lol.

You had been away for a couple of weeks, exploring the Surface like the rest of the Skyloft folk. You were one of the pioneers.

Following Link's heroic rescue of Zelda, whom you still couldn't quite believe was the reincarnation of the Goddess Hylia, more and more people had begun their descent to the Surface with the aim of establishing settlements. Of course, it was going to be a relatively long process and the question of “What will happen to the Loftwings?” was still hanging in the air, but that was something to deal with in due time. 

Link and Zelda, your closest friends from the academy. Your childhood friends… Well, everybody was childhood friends in Skyloft, which had a limited area and not a big population, a fact you have found out only recently. In fact even the term was relatively new thanks to Link, who had been recently traveling with eight other “Links”. That was how you learnt in the first place, listening to them whenever they “dropped by”. 

But Link, he was special. Not special in the way other people thought of him as the hero, though. Sure, he was one of the only people, along with Zelda, which you could easily get along with. You both loved pumpkin soup and skydiving. 

Oh he WAS an absolute airhead. He barely practiced and somehow pulled through his knight exam. Though you did think Groose was an absolute ass, he had a point. Link did have it kinda easy. Not that it had ever been a problem.

To be fair to him, there had been a time finally that made him go through the challenge of his life. Most likely traumatized him too.

However, you were also there when he was first united with his Crimson Loftwing. You sneaked out of the academy with him on the night he first pulled the Goddess Sword out, meeting the spirit Fi. You were also there when he had to say goodbye to her. You always listened to him just as he always confided in you.

The way he made you feel without even trying was something you still couldn't comprehend. His full lips, his gentle yet mischievous behavior, and the warmth that radiated from his cerulean eyes, which looked like the clear sky above the Cloud Barrier, always left your heart aflutter. You could see how he changed because of his journey, but his core qualities were still there, only polished. 

Everybody knew he was a hero, a sleepyhead. 

But only you knew what a cute gremlin he was beneath that kind and naive looking surface.

Well, you and Zelda. 

You were supposed to play the Goddess at the 25th year Ceremony. You were so looking forward to it, you wanted to finally tell Link how you felt.

But instead you were recovering from a fever, something that is extremely rare to happen in Skyloft, people simply didn’t get that sick often-if at all. Zelda happily stepped in, which you were extremely bittersweet about.

You sighed.

You were really close with Link but Link and Zelda's connection was undeniable, just like the destinies that intertwined their lives. You often watched from the sidelines as they shared smiles, secrets, and stolen moments. Even when nobody else knew, holy Hylia (which felt weird to say out loud now), probably even before Link knew, you realized they were into each other.

Under other circumstances perhaps, you would have cheered them on. By Hylia, you wanted to do that. Two best friends falling for each other, you cheering them on? Absolutely. 

But it wasn’t that simple.You wanted his arms around you instead.

And then Zelda got kidnapped to the Surface, Link went after her. Of course she was his chosen hero. Each time Link got back from the Surface, during his adventure, he cried on your shoulder at night. You cried with him. 

You both thought you were going to lose Zelda, after all. 

It was an odd feeling, having your heart twisted in the most messed up way possible. You were overjoyed when they got back, yet envy clouded it and despair consumed it.

So you stayed silent. (Un)Lucky for you, Link’s airheadedness expanded to your end as well, there was no way he would know about your feelings. You felt guilty as well, how could you have nurtured those feelings when Zelda got lost, maybe you should have helped more?

At some point Link did disappear again, which was the point you were the one that comforted Zelda. Then Link came back with… uhm… other Links, for a while, which was another long story. 

So what was all this rambling about now?

Oh well. It was all fine now.

____________________________

Link walked to the area they recently (yet suddenly) had to set up, a little garden-like space with a lot of flowers, thanks to Peatrice. He had a few potions he picked up from Bertie and Luv, you liked those. He also had your notebook, you really liked carrying it with you generally, even when you didn’t write on it as frequently as before. He sat down near a tree, and took a look at one of the last entries. 

You wrote about the day when the Chain first arrived at the settlement, Link smiled fondly.

“Crazy stuff. Before getting on the road again to explore the surface, I went back to our settlement to resupply and saw… SO MANY LINKS?! They were similar yet different in other ways. They said they don’t have Loftwings though, how weird.

He turned the page, and read more about what you talked about with the others. It was quite entertaining to see another perspective. He continued:

“...I saw all those other Links, and most of them were really fond of their Zeldas… Even in those other lives, as if it was written on the stars. Except… There was this older fellow with a scar on his eye. He said he married a “farm” girl (still cannot imagine what it is) named Malon. So maybe in another life? Hah… Hopefully Hylia will show me mercy then. Maybe in another life. A life where it would be meant for us instead.”

Rest of the entry was just about your plans on your next tour out on the Surface.

Link froze and started weeping. It was too much. Just too much. How did he not notice?

___________

Yes, you had been away for a few weeks, exploring the Surface.

Except, you barely made it back to the settlement, with an almost gushing wound on your side from a moblin you barely avoided. You were a pioneer, it came with risks of course.

But nobody thought you would be pioneering the settlement’s first graveyard.

________

Gondo from the Scrap Shop was one of the other people that helped a lot, with your gravestone specifically. .

_______

Oh well. It was all “fine” now.

So what was all this rambling about? You thought to yourself, as you watched him cry. You tried hugging him with your non-existent body, yet… 

It will be okay, you whispered. It will be okay.

Link shivered.

[laurelindebear]

Finally saw the Mummy 25th anniverary release in the cinema yesterday and AAAAAAAAHHHHH IT'S SO GOOD ON THE BIG SCREEN. I know it's not all accurate (either to the various parts of ancient Egypt or 1920s Egypt/North Africa) but it's just gorgeous, from the opening shot of 'Thebes' to the golden desert panoramas to giant 15-foot-tall Ardeth on a huge screen aaaaaaaaaaah I'm dead.

I had cuddly baby Horus and his handmade tagelmust with me the whole time, I wore my Key of Hamunaptra earrings, I wore my Medjai necklace, I wore my Ardeth t-shirt. I've never been to the movies alone but I loved every second.

I can't remember if I've even been to the cinema since Covid and I think I missed it more than I realised. I'm not a huge film buff, and we've got a big tv (my partner is an avid tv viewer). But when it comes to some shots, the panoramas, the detail in the close-ups, the shots that are there for unabashed visual aesthetic - like maybe my favorite shot of all time, Wall-E reaching out to touch the swirl of ice/rocks as he clings to the Axiom - the cinema screen gives an immersiveness the tv can't match.

I'd seen it last week again as well, with a friend who'd never seen it, and between the two I noticed some things I hadn't before, or had forgotten. So this is gonna be long and rambly and full of questions and observations.

The brownface and imperialism is bad. Some of it I guess is period-accurate, and partly to indicate that certain characters aren't great people/are earning their grisly deaths (Chamberlain and the Americans). But a lot of it is inexcusable. Omid Djalili's performance is pretty over-the-top (and he is afaik Iranian and not Arab), a lot of 'Egyptian' characters clearly aren't (even beyond the main cast, all of Imhotep's priests look like White guys in gold paint to me. Some of the Medjai eg the one with the hook are also in brownface.)

A lot of local diggers and Medjai are killed in the Medjai raids and the plagues and it's not really acknowledged much. You'd think Ardeth would still have some hard feelings about Rick/Evy/Jon having killed people he's known all his life but maybe you have to develop a different view of violence and death when your whole life is centred on stopping the end of the world.

When the heroes are fleeing from the museum, they crash the car and run a short distance away. Rick, Ardeth and Jonathan escape via a manhole to get to Winston at the airfield. When they arrive at the airfield, they seem to be in the same car. How?

Why does Evy seem to be waking up on the slab? When we last saw her she was wide awake and chastising Beni. Feels like something was cut here.

The Medjai with the hook also has the following tattoos on his cheek: Gardiner's sign U6 or U7 (mr) and 2x H6 or (I think) M17 (y or j). What is ymr or mry? 'Beloved'? Is Anck's name in there too? What do they all mean? I must know! Would it be weird if I tried to write to the designers and artists from the film about it?

Some of the Medjai (or other workers) performing the Hom Dai have no tattoos on their arms. Most of the Medjai have tattoos which include one of the eye symbols (Eye or Horus or Eye of Ra) on their shoulders. Sidenote, I think Ardeth should have worn the old-timey Medjai outfit just once, for science. (Good thing we have the amazing @minilev to imagine it for us.)

The Hamunaptra cat is really totally out of the bag by the end of it. Not only is there treasure and archaeological finds (sadly not the Book of Amun-Ra, dammit Jonathan 😜) but Cairo had about 5 simultaneous (super)natural disasters. Ain't no covering that up. They're gonna need to recruit a lot more Medjai. (I volunteer! It will not go well for me though. I would be the worst Medjai of all time.)

Did Patricia Velasquez play the mummified version of Anck as well?

Who was Imhotep going to sacrifice the first time? One of his priests?

Was already thinking about this before I rewatched it but...the law is distinctly that no other man may touch Anck-su-namun. Has anyone written an AU where Anck and Nefertiri fall in love and escape Seti together? 👀 (I know he treats Nefertiri ok but Anck is clearly not a happy and willing participant in their relationship.) I would read that. (No, me, you already have half a dozen stories you'll never finish. Don't even think about it.)

Where are the camels at the end from? Didn't they all get ridden back after the first time they left Hamunaptra? And I thought there were more horses than camels, anyway.

Ardeth really was supposed to die, it was so clear. He was fist-fighting mummies and then had dynamite thrown at him. I'm not even slightly sad he survived (it's my favorite plot hole of all time!) but...how. Thank you Stephen Sommers for your vision. 🙌

Jonathan's face-journey for his 'Iiiiimhooooteeeeep' line is even more amazing on the big screen. I remember why my sister and I loved it so much. John Hannah and Jonathan are very underrated IMO.

Kevin J O'Connor also underrated. Beni is a weasel through and through...but Kevin plays him so, so well.

What does Beni say in ?Hungarian when Rick confronts him in the egyptologist's office? And how does he understand Imhotep - magic? I can buy he'd learn protective prayers in 10 different languages, but translating Middle Egyptian is another thing entirely.

Evy and Rick doing the 'I love you' 'I know' thing with just their eyes when Evy goes with Imhotep to try to save them. SO GOOD.

Has Brendan Fraser ever been hotter than when Rick first catches sight of Evy after her Bedouin makeover? (Which, coincidentally, has been living rent-free in my head ever since...it's almost an anti-niqab since the sheerness and beading on the veil arguably draw more attention to her and her eyes but...damn girl. 😍

Evy's delight at getting to Hamunaptra on her camel and finally getting to do field work is delightful, it's infectious, it's a pure joy to watch. As a female lead who could so easily have been an ineffectual trophy, she holds her own and carries the film as an equal protagonist to Rick in her own right. And I love her for it.

Evy and Jon are one of the better portrayals of siblings I can think of offhand. They have just the right mix of ride-or-die familial bond and squabbling.

Ardeth Bay's cheekbones cut more deadly than his sword tbqfh. (oops. but it's true.)

I should stop talking because this is so long. But if anyone wants to talk about anything Mummy-related, my inbox is very open!

[nicolesainz]

My team and you (CS55)

Summary: you & carlos are watching a football game and he gets a tad jealous, as you crush over your favorite footballer :)

Warnings: fluff, maybe a bit of angst?!

Carlos Sainz x reader

Carlos has been in a full fanboy mode today. He won’t stop playing on repeat Real Madrid’s anthem, gush about how great it would have been to have the 2015 squad back and is only dressed with the teams merch.

“I knew I had my reasons to stay in Madrid for a few more weeks! If it wasn’t for me, you’d be in Mallorca, watching the game from your phone” I nudged my boyfriend, as he was captivated once more by his favorite team’s stadium.

“How did you know though? I wasn’t even aware of the game. Honestly, thank you for the tickets. It’s been so long since I’ve attended a match. With the races, I barely have time to watch them and keep up” Carlos gives me a soft kiss on the cheek and wraps his arm around my shoulders, laying his head.

“You’re very welcome, and I knew because Chelsea is the team against Real Madrid today. Can’t miss a chance of supporting the Londoners. One of the few times I’m a blue”

“Still don’t understand why you’re so into Premier League. La Liga can be so much more interesting. All the big players are there!” He hums as a give him a deathly stare

“You do remember that I work for your ex BRITISH team? Right? You do know I live in London? Right?”

“Fair enough, but still, not many English teams have won the champions league! Ream Madrid has won it 14 times” he brags while pointing to his white shirt with the team’s logo on it. It was a custom made shirt, which had his number and name written on the back.

“I sometimes think you love Real Madrid more than me!” I give him a cold shoulder and act as if I’ve been hurt

“Oh come on. You know I love you to death, don’t you cariño? There’s nothing more important than you in my life” I could have easily melted right there on the floor. His words always make me smile.

He grabs me by the waste and closes the gap between us with a soft kiss. His one hand is supporting my head, whilst mine are holding his waist. I simply loves those small moments between us.

When the kiss breaks after we hear the loud applause by the crowd, Carlos whispers in my ear,

“But if we lose tonight, guess who will be sleeping on the couch” he leaves me hanging with another small peck on the lips

“Game on”

The large screens on top of the stadium project the players starting for each team. I see the names of a few I was expecting, James, Chilwell, Havertz, Pulisic, Ziyech, Sterling, but disappointment hits me as I see that my favorite player’s name is followed by the mark “SUB”

“Ah fucking hell” I let out and remove my jacket, revealing my shirt of the night

“What? Chelsea seems to have a good team on board tonight. Everyone seems excited” Carlos looks at me worryingly

“No, I agree, the team is more than great. I was hoping to see my favorite player as a starter but he’s a sub for tonight”

Carlos’s eyes fall on the board, as the cameras projects one of Chelsea’s midfielders, Mason Mount. He realizes I’ve been staring at the screen for more than necessary.

“It’s him, isn’t he?” there’s a hint of anger in his voice

“Yeap” I drag the “P” and we both sit down on our seats

“I’m sorry he’s benched for the moment”

“Well, that’s okay. At least the team looks strong today so that’s what matters the most” I try and give him a kind smile, since he’s a bit more tense now, after seeing Mason on the big screen.

The game starts and everything seems to be going well for both teams. The feeling of the stadium is so vibrant and powerful that the cheers almost never stop.

During the 25th minute, Real Madrid scores, with Modrić being the lead scorer of the team. Every Real Madrid fan gets up from their seat and gets closer to the pitch, to congratulate their player. Carlos follows their steps, being very happy and glad about the lead they have.

Before the first half ended, Chilwell scores a goal, only to be injured afterwards because of Benzema kicking him before he could get closer to Real Madrid’s end.

“Hey what on earth was that!” I shout, following the lead of other Chelsea fans who starting chanting “Chily” as a sign of saying thank you for helping the team equalize.

“You’ve already gotten a yellow card. This was barely a foul” Carlos complained

“Are you serious right now? He literally kicked him, they showed it on the replay, but there’s no card or anything! Unfair man”

Carlos goes closer to the pitch, to see what is going on with the Chelsea player who is lying on the floor, almost crying from the pain.

“He’s out. They just said it” he tells me as he comes back to his seat

“What? It’s that serious? Oh my lord! And they still didn’t count this as a foul. Shame!”

When the half time break ends, the ref holds the big black board on his hands, showing that number 19 will be substituting for number 21

“Is that-?” Before Carlos could finish his sentence, he saw all the Chelsea fans, giving a around of applause to the player leaving and now joining the pitch, which was to his disappointment, Mason.

“Oh yes! Finally!!” I removed my jacket again, only for Carlos to see that on the back of the shit, the name “Mount” has been printed, followed by the number 19

“You even have a jersey of his?” His eyes widen just with the thought of me wearing a shirt with another’s man name on it.

“It’s only one! Plus, I’ve got like 8 of yours! And twice as many hats” I reply to him before I turn all my attention back to the game.

I was really excited to see my favorite player helping his team to go for another success. He has faith and so do the fans.

The score was still 1-1 and the time was now 87 minutes. The end was about to approach. Mason has had so many chances to score the perfect goal but always preferred to play it safe and pass it to one of his teammates who were closer to the net.

“Come on Mase! You can do it” I whisper under my breath so Carlos can’t hear me. I think that even after the match, he will force me to burn the shirt in front of his eyes.

Clock hits 90th minute and the crowd goes wild as Mason’s kick finds its way into the net. Perfect timing. As if it was pre planned by god.

“HOLY SHIT WE WON! FUCKING HELL!” I start jumping and immediately start filming the reaction of everyone after the final goal.

“Please don’t make me sleep on the couch babe. I’ll do whatever you want” Carlos pleaded me

“I’m not crazy to let you sleep on the couch and then be in pain because of bad sleeping position” I kiss him softly on the cheek and put on my jacket back. There’s something that Carlos hasn’t noticed yet!

“Are you ready Carlos? Should we get going?” I started looking around me to double check that none of our personal belongings have been left somewhere.

“Uh, no, not yet! Give me 10 minutes. That’s all I need” he was holding his phone very tightly and apparently texting someone, who I couldn’t really tell.

“For what? Are you alright?” I get closer to him caressing his back, while he immediately shuts his phone off.

“Something’s up. You’re not fooling me. Who were you texting?” I take his jaw on my hand and turn his face to look me in the eyes

“Be patient. I promise there’s nothing wrong going on” Carlos says before I hear a voice exclaiming his name.

“Hey, Carlos!” I stop looking at my boyfriend and all my attention has been once again grabbed by the man coming towards our direction

“That’s-that’s-M-Ma-Mason Mo-Mount! Wha-how?” My voice is trembling and so were my legs at the moment

“It’s nice to meet you Mason! Thank you for agreeing to this!” The two men give each other a firm handshake and pat each other on the back

“Of course! A little bird told me you were here tonight and that you never miss a match, even during work” Mason looks at me smiling and my happiness is more than apparent.

I get confused for a moment as to who knows all these details, then it hit me!

“I texted Lando and since he knows Mason personally, I asked him if we could meet up” Carlos explains

Carlos is probably the biggest sweetheart to have ever walked the planet earth. He always manages to surprise me no matter the case!

“It’s really nice to meet you Y/N. Thank you for all the support and for coming here tonight. We all truly appreciate it” the footballer welcomes me with a hug and I feel like I want to scream.

“I can’t believe I’m meeting you in real life! I’ve been a fan of yours since the debut and never imagined this would happen. I saw you at the Monaco GP and at Silverstone but wasn’t really allowed to come up and talk to you. Plus you’d think I’m crazy”

“Nah! You should have come around. Lando always mentions you whenever we talk about the races and how good of an race engineer you are”

“I think I owe Lando everything now after this!”

“Hey what about me? I was the one who arranged this!” Carlos feels betrayed but isn’t since he’s acting

I wrap my arms around his waist and give him the biggest hug ever. I’m so grateful for him.

“If you ever feel like coming to another game, even at Stamford Bridge, I’ll give the both of you box passes. I’d love to see you again”

“I don’t know what to say! Thank you so much Mason! Also congratulations for today! What an amazing goal” I bring out my inner fan girl

“She was literally about to drop on the floor when she saw you were a sub”

We all laugh and talk a bit more about football and the races. After that we exchange our goodbyes and me and Carlos leave the stadium.

“I think that, I’m the one who will do whatever you want” I tell Carlos, having my arm around his shoulders

“I just want you to be happy! That’s all I ask” he says lifting me up and leaving kisses all over my cheeks

“I don’t think I’ve ever loved a person more than you Carlos. Thank you for everything”

“Anything for you cariño”

[rupertsfangirl]

Motorcyclist in my car Oct 25th

Summary: A semi-journal type text about a sexual encounter with a masked biker. 

Tags & Warnings: Smut, alcohol use, drunk reader (sorta), outdoor sex, mask fetish. Think I missed a tag or warning? Please let me know!

Word count: 1.3k Pairing: Masked man x Fem!Reader

A/N: I think I wanna turn this into a mini series but idk. The journal aspect of it is a bit lost sometimes but I still think what I wanted is in there. Please enjoy :> Also I know I've been gone awhile I was kind of taking a break from writing and stuff to be a consumer for a while (reading fanfictions on my new hyperfixation).

To start I was pretty drunk and on what one might consider a vacation, but this had been on my bucket list for a while. I guess that last shot sealed the deal and gave me enough, I wanna say confidence but that doesn't seem right. It was wrong and I knew it but that's what made it so exciting. I remember looking up into the reflective visor on the unknown man's biker helmet. His identity, forever a mystery which honestly turns me on now thinking about it. I’m thinking of doing something like this again. The thrill of not knowing was a feeling I’d only fantasized about before. Maybe I’ll write a little series of my endeavors, and I’ll be detailed so don’t worry. Now, I’ll get to what happened. 

The bar's lights were really starting to annoy me which is why I walked out and bumped into him in the first place. My face planted straight into his chest, it was firm. I quickly apologized to him but he stayed silent and just kind of looked at me. I imagine he may have been falling in love at that moment, that's what my big ego says anyway. He gave me a nod of forgiveness and walked inside. As he moved past me I looked him up and down, nothing crazy, some black sweats and a green hoodie but he seemed fit underneath the concealing clothing. I took a seat outside close to where his bike was. I was kind of hoping to catch him leaving, our small interaction piqued my interest; I could only hope it piqued his too. I sat for what felt like ages but I must have fallen asleep because I was woken up to the helmeted man crouched next to me shaking my shoulder. I could hear the sounds of a muffled hey underneath the helmet. I groggily lifted my head from my knees and tried to wipe the bit of drool on my lower lip. 

“Y’know you oughta be more careful where you sleep.” His voice remained muffled. 

“Huh?” I could hear him chuckle, it sounded warm and gentle, a real suave laugh. I thought it was odd he hadn’t taken off the helmet but it only made me more interested. 

“I said you should be more careful where you sleep.” I nodded at him, closing my eyes from the remaining tiredness. He seemed to be rolling his eyes under the visor, “Do you have a friend here or a car? Don’t drive but at least you can sleep in a safer place.” 

“Yea that blue one there.” I pointed towards my car.

“Alright let's go then,” he pulled my arm over his shoulder and started walking me toward the car. 

“Hey, wait I don’t want you to just disappear after this.”

“You don’t even know me.”

“Well talk to me, let me learn a little about you.” At this point we had reached my car and I was leaning on the driver door with him next to me. I felt quite sobered up but in actuality I was still quite out of it. 

“Fine, you’ve intrigued me. Oh hold on lemme take this-”

“NO!” I quickly slapped his hand away from his helmet. He was so surprised he had stepped back a bit and I can only assume he looked either confused or shocked, probably both. 

“What was that for? No?”

“K-keep the helmet on.”

“What, why, you can’t really hear me well can you?”

“Well it adds to your mystery, and my hearing is stronger than most.” It isn’t but he didn’t need to know that besides I could hear him well enough. 

We talked for a while, we laughed and all that good connection stuff, then he asked again about the helmet thing and why I didn’t want him to take it off. I told him the real reason: It turned me on, it was super hot, he seemed both proud and curious. 

I suppose we just spoke all the right words to each other to get into one another's pants. 

But one thing led to another and we were inside the back seat of my car tearing each other's clothes off. He’s pulling off my shirt, my bra then my pants and underwear; while I yank down his pants and boxers. There was no way of getting the hoodie off with the helmet on but I didn’t need all that. He pinched my nipples between his rough fingers while his other hand teased over my clit. Honestly I was surprised he found it. I could tell he was hot from all the panting, I could only assume his helmet was like a small ecosystem. I was moaning like we weren’t in a public space and not the fake ones. These were real, I was excited; I was aroused. His fingers made their way down and into my vagina making my back arch. I kept staring into his visor knowing he could see all of me; my erotic faces reflecting back at me, my nude body. In contrast to him; I didn't know what kind of man was behind that visor, what kind of faces he makes during sex. At this point I was soaking and couldn’t wait, impatiently I beg for him to fuck me already. He obliges and lines up his sizable cock before slowly pushing inside. A gasp slips from my mouth and I hear a faint moan from him. My hands move to grip his back sliding underneath his hoodie. It has a soft muscular feel. He starts to move, his quiet grunts and groans escaping through his helmet. At first his movements were a bit awkward but eventually we got into a good 

pace. He had surprisingly good stamina. He sat up more using his rough hands to grip my hips, thrusting at a new angle making me want to scream. He kept hitting my sensitive part as my moans grew louder, suddenly my hand was pushing against his lower abdomen. 

“I think, I hear someone.” His hips slowly came to a halt and I began listening more intently hearing some faint laughing outside, it didn't sound that close so maybe I was just being paranoid. He probably couldn’t hear that well so I was on a higher alert.

Tilting his head and asking, “But, isn’t that part of the fun?” He used his hand to pull my chin to look back at him, before covering my mouth and continuing to move. Definitely one of the top five hottest moments I've had with someone, probably even top 3. I was starting to get close from his thrusting and my fingers relentlessly on my clit. The throbbing and twitching of his dick inside me let me know he was also close. He slid his hand off of my mouth and placed both hands back on my hips, quickening his pace. Our body heat filled the car, steamy windows, moans and grunts, inching ever closer to that sweet release. He kept hitting a spot that made me feel like a glass about to spill over, I could see my face in his visor as I got closer to climax, I had never felt as beautiful as I felt in that moment. Then it all poured out, I felt a wave of pleasure wash over me, he came just moments before myself. He stayed inside but the condom caught it all (I had one in my glove box). He pulled out and we stayed breathing heavily for a while just looking at each other; I assumed he was looking at me but his eyes could have been wandering my body for all I know. 

We tied off the condom, got cleaned, and got dressed. Then we went our separate ways, I walked with him to his bike before watching him disappear into the distance on the road. Overall a steamy encounter, one I’ll never forget. But he may have competition soon, Halloweens coming up and there will be plenty of masked fish to choose from. 

[beevean]

Frontiers is bad and boring to play but I take it over Forces anytime of the day, first the gameplay plays the game for you half of the time why is Classic Sonic here? Other then Sonic Team being desperate? Why did Tails forget he could fly? INFINITE was wasted and his theme song is embarrassing. Why bother using Chaos if he wasn't even going to be a boss level? Sonic is tortured ? Okay sorry but atleast Frontiers had a better ost.

why is Classic Sonic here? Other then Sonic Team being desperate?

Most likely because 1) Forces was meant to be one of the 2 games for the 25th anniversary, even if they both slid forward one year, 2) precisely to connect Forces and Mania, 3) to piggyback on the success of Generations. Do you want to call it pandering? Feel free to call it pandering, by 2016 fans weren't as eager to play as Classic again, true. But then we can also call pandering the relentless references to the Adventure era in Frontiers, both in simple "hey this reminds me of X" and in general plot beats - now that game very much wants to win the Adventure crowd back more than Forces wanted to appeal to the Classic fans.

Why did Tails forget he could fly?

Do you mean when Sonic (Sonic the fucking Hedgehog) was getting his entire shit beaten out by a terrifying creature not even his Miles Electric could understand, plus clones of formidable enemies that included Shadow?

I don't know, I get the flak against "Sonic help me", but I don't blame Tails for not knowing what to do in that situation.

INFINITE was wasted and his theme song is embarrassing.

Opinion discarded. Infinite's theme slaps absolute ass and if you don't agree AND AFTER ALL THIS TIMEEEEEEE YOU'RE BACK FOR MOOOOOOOOOOOOORE

I agree that something happened to Infinite during development, as everything in the main game hinted at him being a fully artificial creature and not a rando still sore that he was beaten by Shadow lol. But dude was cool in my book. I really like that stage where he creates all sorts of creepy illusions to stop Operation Big Wave :P he could have had more screentime, but he chewed that little screentime we had just fine. better than the end, anyway and always.

Why bother using Chaos if he wasn't even going to be a boss level?

The game was most likely rushed, which sucks, no doubt about that. But somehow, only Forces gets treated like a piece of shit for being rushed, when Frontiers doesn't get nearly the same amount of disappointment for being pretty much a test game (and we know it was rushed because of the last two islands that are pieces cut from Kronos Island and for the weird way Sonic's corruption was handled). Hell, by this point, even '06 is getting apologism even though until recently it was the king of rushed games, and much worse about it than the previous examples.

Either you're equally uncharitable with rushed games that sacrificed content (so I'm not talking about game breaking glitches), or you cut them all some slack.

Sonic is tortured ? Okay sorry

Sloppy translation. And while Sonic looks chipper after being freed, and we can argue all day if that's IC or not, you can guess from things like him beating Zavok with his bare fists or the veiled death threat he gives Infinite that deep down he's actually pretty angry.

Now, Sonic being rescued by his corruption in Frontiers in a minute, undoing all of his hard work in rescuing his friends, and him being just as chipper after Sage, the girl he had just befriended, died in space, is not sloppy translation, it's the game getting rushed to hell (although I don't know why Flynn blames time constraints when it comes to Sonic not sparing a thought about Sage lol).

atleast Frontiers had a better ost.

I like both ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ and Frontiers' cyberspace themes are clearly inspired by the Avatar themes in Forces.

[thelooniemoonie]

Look at how far we've come (Happy 25th birthday to me!)

I'm gonna put some of my thoughts under the cut here, so if you wanna hear me reflect or get personal for a second feel free to scroll past. (CW: mentions of suicide, and other dark topics)

I'm writing this the day or so before queuing this so by the time you read it it will be my birthday but I'm writing this on like. Wednesday

And...well? I guess I'm turning 25? I know it's technically a big milestone because it's like 25% through your life or whatever, but it feels....kinda weird? Like, "oh, I guess I'm turning 25."

I don't quite know how to explain how I'm feeling. It's not necessarily bad? I know we live in a world that puts a lot of unnecessary pressure on age and getting older, but i don't really care about that kinda stuff like getting grey hairs or wrinkles. But this is a new feeling.

It's more like....the feeling of realization once you reflect a bit. A lot of stuff has happened over the past few years, but once you actually turn and look back all of the events you lived through, you kinda realize how much you've grown. Going step by step, day by day, and only realizing once you turn around that you've climbed an entire mountain.

Back when I was 12 years old, I attempted to kill myself.

At the time, the future felt like a dark fog with nothing ahead in sight. I was living in dangerous abusive conditions with my father, severely depressed, and actively spiralling with my own identity, let alone my place in the world. The future was nonexistent.

Now...when I reflect back on that period of my life, it feels like worlds away now.

(Also don't worry if you're reading this and feel concern for me, I haven't felt any suicidal feelings in practically a decade now. I'm sure as hard things may seem sometimes, I genuinely am miles away from that headspace and do not intend to hurt myself in any way.)

It's kinda weird knowing back when I was younger (which isn't that long ago, to be fair) that I already felt like my life was over. Like I just wasn't gonna get into university, I was gonna drop out, I'm gonna have to navigate the entire trajectory of my life in that deep fog.....

.....and now realizing where I am? It's weird. Like I didn't plan for any of this. I should be dead. I'm just winging this entire thing.

But.... it's also realizing that I'm gonna be fine.

To be perfectly honest, this year has been kinda rough for me. While I don't talk about my personal life too much on here I was pretty miserable the first 4 months due to getting screwed over during the start of my Masters, plus not seeing my irl friends for a while hasn't been ideal either. (I also feel kinda shitty complaining about these things in general, as I'm well aware these kinds of opportunities are things not everyone is able to get, and I know there's friends and others that have it worse off than me, so I just kinda keep that shit to myself)

But I've also come a long way haven't I? I've managed to graduate in the middle of a pandemic, managed to land a job helping the covid pandemic in my province, got my drivers licence, made memories with the ones I love and meeting new people, slowly becoming more independent and now doing climate change research for my Masters degree? It's...something.

It's kinda the feeling of your world being very small, like a tiny space where the fog obscures anything outside your view, and slowly it fading away and your world getting bigger. Like sure I can't 100% see the future, but it's important to reflect on knowing what that world was like before.

I wish I had something poetic here or a message or life lesson to articulate my thoughts. But that doesn't really work here. (I'm also being careful to focus on positive aspects of my life here, as it wouldn't really be great to focus on the more negative aspects, like that time I almost died again (this time not on purpose, I promise) in a car crash in 2020 or a really bad breakup I had with a group of friends. But I suppose that's just life, isn't it? You really get a wide variety of experiences, good or bad)

I can't really say my life is 100% improved at this point either, things still aren't perfect as I'm still living with my mom, a closeted queer, and I'm sure there's a lot that I still need to learn and considering, the uh, well (vaguely gestures at all the current events going on right now) stuff....going on........there's still a lot of work to be done.

Dandelions in the spring. A shining moon on a dark night. The first seedling after a forest fire. Fading scars. Light from a birthday candle held in your hands, carrying wishes in the wind long after they burn out.

Hope, I guess.

Anyway if you read this far here's my official adult™ tips from my experience:

If you wear jewellery that tarnishes quickly line a bowl with tinfoil shiny side up, place jewellery in the bowl with equal parts baking soda and salt, and pour boiling water over everything and leave for 5 minutes

Invest in a cushion that supports your tailbone. You have no idea how many office chairs have shit ergonomic design.

[lurlur]

I've been getting into hockey for the last, like, 16 months. I'm running a little bit of a fever. I'm British so the concept of mascots is a little bit weird to me. Let's do this.

In order of the current whole league standings, as of January 25th 2023:

Rating the NHL mascots

Part 1

Completely arbitrarily! My system makes no sense!

Boston Bruins

Blades the Bruin

Bruin means bear, so this makes sense as a choice. I guess I get what they were going for with the name but it just kinda makes it sound like a low level gangster. Feels like they couldn't decide whether to make a teddy bear or a scary bear and just got an unsettling middle ground. The eyes are very dead.

Vibes: 6/10

Aesthetic: 4/10

Horror: 3/10

Fuckability: 3/10

Overall, 4/10. Not awful, but not great.

Honourable mention for methbear from the winter classic this year. That was a design team that knew how to make choices.

Carolina Hurricanes

Stormy

Stormy is, apparently, a pig. If there's some obvious North Carolina/pig connection, I'm not aware of it. Stormy feels very low effort. The design is weak and lacking in character. It doesn't even look like a good fur suit, tbh. Very big eyes so we're definitely not trying to be intimidating here. Stormy must not be one of those 30-50 feral hogs you used to hear so much about.

Vibes: 5/10

Aesthetic: 2/10

Horror: 0/10

Fuckability: 1/10

Overall, 2/10. Horrible but not for interesting reasons.

New Jersey Devils

NJ Devil

Why does it have abdominal muscles? Clearly, this one is a slut, which I approve of. The name is super uninspired and the design is pretty obvious, but I still find myself on the way to liking it. It's got character and it's not trying to be too human. I know it's not what the New Jersey devil is actually supposed to be, but it looks a horrible kind of fun. What that tongue do?

Vibes: 7/10

Aesthetic: 5/10

Horror: 5/10

Fuckability: 7/10

Overall, 6/10. I don't love it, but I don't hate it either and that's something.

Toronto Maple Leafs

Carlton the Bear

Carlton is named after the street where the old Leafs arena was. And he's an adorable polar bear. Look at him. He's like the coca cola polar bear without the mischief. That's a face you can trust. Looks like he gives great hugs. I would like to find out.

Vibes: 10/10

Aesthetic: 9/10

Horror: 0/10

Fuckability: 8/10

Overall, 7/10, but the lack of horror is a feature and not a bug. So really he's 9/10.

Dallas Stars

Victor E. Green

There's so much to hate here. The name is a bad pun on the Stars "victory green" colours. The character is supposed to be an alien but the design is so lazy. They could have gone in so many directions with this one and instead they just did this. Why even have a mascot if you're going to put this little effort in? No expression. No character. Just green.

Vibes: 2/10

Aesthetic: 2/10

Horror: 1/10

Fuckability: 1/10

Overall, 1.5/10. Very bad showing.

Winnipeg Jets

Mick E. Moose

Someone's trying to get suuuueeedddd! Nah, it's been over a decade and the mouse doesn't appear to have come knocking so I guess the jorts are getting away with it. Mick, here, looks quite the formidable fellow. I like his flying cap and absolutely unhinged expression. I truly believe that he could find me in my dreams and make me regret decisions I haven't even made yet. There's something wrong with him and it looks interesting.

Vibes: 7/10

Aesthetic: 8/10

Horror: 7/10

Fuckability: 8/10

Overall, 7.5/10. Very respectable. I will see you in my nightmares, Mr Moose.

Tampa Bay Lightning

ThunderBug

ThunderBug is a lightning bug. Sensible choice for the Lightning. I've seen him on broadcasts a few times but never been able to ascertain if his butt glows. I think it should and anyone who disagrees is wrong. The first time I saw him, he had a big fake beard and I was not a fan of that look at all. Unadorned, I think he's a decent mix of cute and goofy. He's definitely got some character and energy to him.

Vibes: 7/10

Aesthetic: 7/10

Horror: 1/10

Fuckability: 6/10

Overall, 5/10. Again, lack of horror is not really a negative. This is a pretty good boy.

Vegas Golden Knights

Chance the Gila Monster

Look at this boy. This is what perfection looks like. I think he should be President of the whole world. I would marry him tomorrow. Look at those kind eyes and sweet smile. He could fit my whole head in his mouth and I would thank him. He's literally never done anything wrong in his whole life. You can't see it in this photo, but he even has a very cute tail. Best boy. The only horror would be at the thought that he might not love me.

Vibes: 100/10

Aesthetic: 100/10

Horror: 0/10

Fuckability: 10/10

Overall, perfection. The platonic ideal of mascots.

LA Kings

Bailey

This is Bailey. Bailey is a lion. This is, apparently, a pretty new look for Bailey. He used to look a lot meaner but he underwent cosmetic surgery and now looks like this. I wish that wasn't the story that the Kings used to relaunch a mascot with a difficult history... But here we are. I'm just judging mascots. Bailey looks weird for a lion, too dark, too smiley, not enough teeth. I feel like there's a spark missing here. Something that would bring life and character to Bailey. He's just a bit generic and underwhelming.

Vibes: 5/10

Aesthetic: 4/10

Horror: 2/10

Fuckability: 3/10

Overall, 3.5/10. Could have and should have done better.

Seattle Kraken

Buoy the Troll

New for this season, Buoy the Troll has a lot of attention to detail that I really like. He's got stuff in his hair and ears that tell of a nautical background. I'm pretty sure he fucked a kraken. I feel like "troll" is a cop out in the same way that "alien" is, but Buoy makes it work better. My main gripe with Buoy is that I can't make myself say the name out loud. It's not said the way that I pronounce the word. That bothers me more than it should.

Vibes: 8/10

Aesthetic: 8/10

Horror: 3/10

Fuckability: 2/10

Overall, 5/10. Largely because fuckability goes way down if I can't say your name.

New York Rangers

None

Perfect. No notes. Keep doing what you're doing, sweeties. This is the best way to have a mascot: not at all.

Vibes: immaculate

Aesthetic: unparalleled

Horror: unknowable

Fuckability: Schrödinger's fuckability

Overall, no one else is doing it like the Rangers. And they should. (not you, Vegas. Obviously)

Full disclosure, I fell asleep at this point. So now I have to use the standings as of Thursday 26/01. Deal with it.

Edmonton Oilers

Hunter the Lynx

I hate it. I'm saving you from the image, but please know that this lynx also has sculpted abdominals. Again with the bad fur suit vibes, the face is the stuff of nightmares, I'm deeply upset by the jowls. Should the NHL start hiring furries to design their mascots? MAYBE!

Vibes: 2/10 Aesthetic: 1/10 Horror: 8/10 Fuckability: 1/10 Overall, 3/10. Horrible. Soulless. Bad in a bad way, not even a fun way.

Pittsburgh Penguins

Iceburgh

Mixed feelings here, gotta be honest. Love the name and, obviously, it had to be a penguin. He looks pretty fun. But the beak and eyes are giving me "lifeless glove puppet" energy. He could be more penguiny and less flat. Curse the performer's need to see and breathe, eh?

Vibes: 7/10

Aesthetics: 5/10

Horror: 3/10

Fuckability: 2/10

Overall, 4/10 because he loses out on both horror and fuckability by looking too socklike. Sorry, Iceburgh.

Washington Capitals

Slapshot

Slapshot is a really big seagull eagle. He looks pretty fierce, which is not an expression I'm used to seeing on bald eagles. Beautiful plumage. I like him. Good vibes, I think. No word on whether he also has abs to flash at us, but I'm choosing to believe that he doesn't. It's better this way. I wouldn't trust him not to steal my chips though.

Vibes: 8/10

Aesthetic: 8/10

Horror: 4/10

Fuckability: 8/10

Overall, 7/10. Really decent showing for this birb.

Colorado Avalanche

Bernie the St. Bernard

That's a good boy right there. Look at his little barrel! The face is missing something that I can't quite put my finger on, but I do like the lolling tongue and droopy jowls. Maybe what's missing is copious amounts of drool? Just something to make it look a bit more alive and engaged? I know it's possible, I've seen it on other mascots!

Vibes: 9/10

Aesthetics: 7/10

Horror: 2/10

Fuckability: 3/10

Overall, 5/10. He's a good dog, Brant.

Calgary Flames

Harvey the Hound

What the fuck is this? Why does it have a metre long tongue? (Not gonna lie, that's points in favour for fuckability) You know those vintage photos of kids meeting the easter bunny only it looks like everyone involved was in hell? That's what I'm getting from this. Dead face. Cheap fur suit. He does know how to accessorise though, check that hat/collar/belt combo.

Vibes: 2/10

Aesthetics: 4/10

Horror: 5/10

Fuckability: 5/10

Overall, 4/10. What that tongue do?

Part 2 is here!

[libertyreads]

Book Review #5 of 2024--

Going Postal by Terry Pratchett. Rating: 4 stars.

Read from January 20th to 25th.

My second Discworld novel is under my belt. You know, at this pace, I'm probably going to finish the Discworld about 250 years after I die. I had read Men at Arms! when I was in college and over a decade later I finally read another novel in the Discworld. I think the thing that keeps me from diving into it wholeheartedly is that there are so many starting points for it that my brain doesn't like it. I was basically given a stack of Discworld novels as a teenager and my uncle said "start anywhere." Which isn't great for someone like me. I like having an order, a plan, something that I can understand and execute. I think if I were to plan on moving forward in this world I would either continue with the City Watch series or the Industrial Revolution series. But, again, I'm not sure when I would pick up more here.

All of that being set aside, I just really enjoy Terry Pratchett. I love the absurdist nature of the Discworld but how relatable it is. This particular one came out two decades ago and there were still so many moments I could point to and see how it related to our current world. I think it's so easy to say that Pratchett understands people, humanity as a whole. Also, as someone who worked in a post office for a semester in college, I have to say that there was so much fun stuff in this one. I also loved that Moist dressed as Hermes for all of the big showy Post Master things he did. And can we talk about how Moist is the most morally grey character of all morally grey characters? Okay, maybe not all, but STILL, I love that little weirdo so much. He has such a change of heart after working in the post office and the fact that he still does con-artist things for the good of the post office and the city? Stop it. I absolutely love it. I also love Stanley who gets so obsessed with a new thing to collect once the stamps come out. The addictive part of my personality sees him and respects him for it.

There were a few things in the novel that felt a bit outdated--Miss Dearheart being a tough, not like other girls female character--but I guess it's to be expected after two decades. There were also some places the plot went that I didn't love, but the story ended in a good place overall for me. A small complaint for me is that I had to read this one in Mass Market Paperback which made the long chapters feel so, so long.

Overall, it was a fun time and I definitely think I'll want to pick up another Discworld novel at some point. Maybe not over a decade from now, but at some point. I don't feel any pressure to dive into another one in the next few months so we'll see when I feel the desire to get back into this crazy world of satire.

[amelias-zelda-calamity-quintet]

Would love a director's commentary of any/all your fics 🙏

AH! I wasn't expecting an answer so fast! And they're so massive where do I even start? Like my biggest thoughts right now are all MoaH, which I have some things queued over the next few days, but everything else I'd wanna say...it's all spoilers. I'm not trying to avoid the ask, it's just a very big question with all of them. I guess I'll throw out a bunch of factoids and feel free to ask me more specifics.

To condense the star ask as well since this is gonna be a random chapter grab, and since the first chapter of the final battle is out tomorrow for GoS, I've had this arc planned since basically 2012. There was one major change on which individual would be the target of a particular stage of the fight, but other than that, it's been this fight since 2012. And the whole thing can get played to the 25th anniversary medley. I have a note somewhere where I wrote down the chapter time stamps to it for the AMV in my head (which maybe I'll put out after GoS is all done). It was the same song that is the reason Endeavor plays violin as well.

I have never been huge about idol groups, but the Earth Sages in GoS are my absolute favorite. I knew I wanted the dungeon to be musically themed and so the boy band idea was an early decision with that. I wanted their names to be musically themed too, so all of the Earth Sages actually have names based off Japanese music scales, which fit with the Keaton. Do Re Mi names might have been too obvious. Following that, Dominus is probably my favorite Sage.

Same dungeon had a prime opportunity for a triple inspired boss name. The Earth Temple's boss, Dungeon Master, has three inspirations. One, it follows franchise convention on most powerful versions of enemies, so Wallmaster/Floormaster -> Dungeon Master. Two, it's a nod to the TTRPG role, as this boss occupies the literal fourth wall of a theater, which is fitting to compare to a DM. And three, this fight was the first time Ganondorf made an appearance in the story, and I was trying to invoke a bit of Mr. Mercer's performance for a lack of ability to convey an actual voice via some pop culture osmosis.

Princess has a Muppets reference after the dungeon once she drops the idea of marrying Link, Zeal mentions it. It may help to circle back on Princess being a pig moblin leaning Blin who is also a diva.

Admittedly a lot of GoS before that is a bit fuzzy cause of the whole nap in the Temple of Time I did on it. From starting up edits, I can say that Bruce's horse, The Wind, is a personal reference. Any time I'd convince my dad to play a Zelda game, he's always name himself A.Stud and in the case of TP, he named Epona The Wind. When I started writing, that was a recent in joke for me.

One of the reasons the Dark Portal gets mentioned so early was because Minecraft was just getting big when I started writing GoS and I had the unrealistic idea that I'd build GoS's Hyrule in it. The Dark Portal would have been a Nether portal. I never went anywhere with that idea, but it's the reason the GoS map sketch I have is divided on a grid. That was theoretically gonna be chunks (highly ambitious plan there, no what it would have fit).

I have actually no idea how much time takes place between the start and end of GoS. Loosely, it's from the beginning of summer to the end of autumn. Whatever time skips make that work are canon in my head. And it's one of the reasons I have been so serious about keeping track of time in MoaH. The rapid pace of GoS though does fit. GoS Link really did get woken up in a dream by some stranger and then harassed by a bird until he did it what they said, so. No rest.

My favorite Sage dragon design is the Forest Sage's, all though the Soul Sage's dragon is pretty good too. That's an easy second. I'm a plants person, what can I say? Though the Earth Sage and Fire Sage dragons have good chonky boi personalities that I love too.

And there's absolutely so much to say about MoaH and like. I can say basically none of it because y'all only have the current 23 chapters and I'm writing the 65th? chapter now. MoaH's first book will be written before its updates are out, that's for sure. It'll likely hit about 250k words, compared to GoS's current 410k. So. There's a lot to say about MoaH. I guess the few that I've got for MoaH, uh...

Rephi x Rudoe is my favorite couple, hands down, those two are amazing NPCs and criminally under used. I need to find an excuse to go back to Deku's Shelf to write them again. I picture Rudoe's voice now like the Luma in the Mario movie.

I know all of my Links talk in my fics, largely for the purpose of medium. Writing a mute Link I think is a lot harder in fic over comics, and it's a little outside my wheelhouse with my limited skill in sign. That said, of all my Links, MoaH Link is the one I think most fits being a talking Link. And I even have some in text response to that later on in the story.

I know a lot of people don't like Zelda presently in MoaH (kinda the point), but I absolutely adore her and Link's dynamic. It really starts coming out in the Nayru's Temple act of book 1, but this man has a massive blind spot for this woman and I love writing it even though the secondhand embarrassment causes me like actual physical pain.

In general, I adore writing MoaH Link. The balance between exceptionally competent fighter and likeable male protagonist is a difficult but very fun line to walk. I think because of the mercenary comment, a lot of people expected a Geralt or a John Wick or some other machismo personality for Link when I originally started MoaH and that has never been franchise characterization of Link and it's not true about MoaH Link. He is a lovable idiot. GoS Link has this very humble, almost bashful personality to me (mostly cause of then teen angst) while MoaH Link gets to be this absolute dork and it is a joy to write. And also seeing how different they are as incarnations of the same character is a lot of fun, particularly for spoiler reasons. But man, that contrast between awkward, fumbling, kinda impulsive guy into combat where he gets to be efficient. Mmmmm, that's some good shit.

I cannot wait for y'all to get more time with Floan. I love her and Link's relationship. It is a bit of a polished sibling relationship, I'll admit that, mostly because I don't know how to handle an age gap as big as theirs (MoaH Link being 27 at the start of the fic and Floan being 10, which not impossible for siblings, but a wide gap) as accurately as my two year age gap with my younger sister, but they are the best. I have a chapter coming up that's just them getting loads of interaction time and it's so goddamn cute.

And I'm getting into spoiler territory, not to mention an essay, so I'll cap it there for now. Please let me know if there's anything else, I have a lot of thoughts on all of this.

[akehoshimystar]

Riku SSR

#7043BB

Part 1

Kiho: Yes, the matter is settled. We managed to convince them. Riku’s cooperation is truly something else, he really made it easier in every aspect. Ito: That's good… I knew he could do it.

A problem occurred during the special request. It was resolved peacefully, and I could finally breathe a sigh of relief.

Kiho: Oh, right. I was going to ask you something when there’s a chance. Are you free on July 25th? It’s Riku’s birthday on the 26th, so the whole Negotiation Dept. are having a dinner, would you like to join? Ito: (Not on the day, but the day before. So it's his birthday’s eve?) I think I’m free on that day. Though I'll check the schedule just to be sure. (25th July…………25th July………………)

Riku: Good work. Ito: Oh, Riku-san. Good work. Kiho: Speak of the devil. Riku: Huh? Kiho: The case was resolved thanks to your help, Riku. Riku: Oh, that one? I’m glad to hear that. Kiho: Now that it's settled, I was asking Ito about her schedule on the 25th. Riku: Oh, I see. I guess it’s hard to refuse when I’m here. Ito: (I think I have a little deadline I have to deal with just before then.) I think it’ll be fine so… Well, I don’t think I’m convincing anyone here. Umm, do I have to hand in the calendar as proof? Riku: Haha. You don't have to go that far. I'd be happy if you could come, but if that costs a change in your plan, I don’t mind if you prioritize it. Kiho: Riku. I think you already know this. What Ito is trying to say is she doesn’t want you to be concerned and be held back by her. It’s rude if you don't take her feeling into account. Riku: Of course I know, and thanks to that I'm on the verge of falling for you. But if we were in different positions, Kiho would have the same reaction as me, no? Kiho: I won’t deny that. Except for the "I'm on the verge of falling for you” part.

Ito: (They get along well.)

As I was watching the casual exchange between these two, my heart skipped a beat when I suddenly saw Riku-san turn towards me.

Riku: Thank you, Ito. I'm looking forward to 25th July.

Ito: Same here.

From the way he looked directly in my eyes, I could tell that his words were not just a lip-service.

Part 2

And then, the night before Riku-san's birthday has arrived….

Riku: Hmm, now this is quite tasteful.

The sound of Shishi-odoshi echoed from the garden. The big set meal lined up in front of us is bright and delicately arranged.

Ito: (.….Wow.) (Since they are the members from Negotiation Dept., I expected it to have a relaxing atmosphere.) (I never thought they'd come to such a high-class restaurant…)

Kiho: By the way, Ito. Everything okay with your work? Ito: Yes, I managed to get it done.

Kyoya: That’s a relief, isn’t it, Riku-san? You were really worried whether she pushed herself too hard. Riku: Come on, don’t just blurt out something like that. Ito: Thank you for your concern. I adjusted myself properly so that I could join you with a clear mind. There's no problem. Riku: Does that mean you worked hard for my sake? Ito: Since I did all that to celebrate Riku-san’s birthday, so in a way you’re not wrong… Kyoya: There doesn't seem to be any deep emotion behind it, Riku-san. Riku: I guess so. Anyway, I'm glad you’re free from your concern now. I'd be happy if you could enjoy yourself today Kiho: I chose a private room so don’t hold yourself back. Ito: Yes. Kyoya: By the way, Riku-san. It seems like this store also has some good whiskey. Riku: Oh, nice. Let's have that next once we finish our beer. Ito: (Riku-san must really like whiskey.) Kyoya: Which brand should we go for? Riku: I'll leave that to you, Kyoya. Just pick out the recommended one. Kyoya: Got it. Riku: I kinda want to increase my drinking pace for this occasion, but I guess I have to keep it moderate to avoid hangover tomorrow. Kyoya: I'm pretty sure you have plans tomorrow night. Riku: Yes, a very important matter. Ito: (I see, since tomorrow is Riku-san’s birthday…) (It's not surprising that he has plans to spend time with someone important.) So that’s why the celebration with Negotiation Dept. came a day early. Riku: Yup. Kiho: ………..

Part 3

Kiho: Even so, Riku is also a serious type. Riku: Where is that coming from? Kiho: Regarding that very important matter of yours. Even though you were asked to go earlier than the original date, there was no need for you to screw your birthday over that, right? Ito: (…………………Huh?) Riku: Well, it seemed like my client needs my presence as soon as possible, even if it’s one day earlier. Ito: (Don’t tell me…..) Kyoya: Oh yeah. Riku-san is a high-demand counselor after all. Ito: (So his important appointment is about work?) Riku: Well, at this age, something like birthday doesn’t really feel special anymore. Even if I have to spend my days working, I don't really mind. Kiho: Funny how when everyone was a kid, they looked forward to it and was excited for days in advance. Kyoya: Does that apply to you too, Kiho-san? Kiho: Who knows? Riku: I can't imagine Kiho being what he is now when he was a child. Ito: (…. I guess they're trying to subtly correct my misunderstanding without mentioning it.)

More than feeling sorry for the mistake, I felt warmed by their smart consideration.

Kyoya: But, Riku-san. There may be people who don't feel special about it, but those around you think of your birthday as a special day. Riku: Oh? Kiho: That's right. The fact that we all gathered here to celebrate Riku’s birthday is enough proof, isn’t it? Riku: You guys really know your way with words, huh? To the point where I really want to capture this marvelous and leisure moment I spend with friends like this.

With that said, Riku-san took out a professional camera from his bag.

Kyoya: In that case, the main character should be in the picture as well. Ito: Oh, I'll do it! Just press the shutter, right? Riku: What are you talking about? We’re all in this together. Let's ask the waitress.

By the time I nodded in response to Riku-san's suggestion, Kiho-san had already made the request to waitress via extension.

Soon after, the commemorative shot was taken.

Riku: Can’t wait to see how it turns out.

After taking a camera from the waitress, we all looked into it. Riku-san and his warm smile were surrounded by everyone.

Riku: ……. Kyoya: It turns out nicely, doesn’t it? Kiho: Right. Ito: (It's refreshing to see Riku-san wear this expression.)

Kyoya: Once again, happy birthday.

Kiho: Happy birthday, Riku. Ito: Happy birthday.

Riku: Hey, you’re making me shy here. But, thank you. The feelings I got from everyone today really touched my heart.

Riku-san looked straight at each person and smiled. Even though it’s not actually his birthday, everyone could tell that today is his special day.

[bedwenchbash]

Art always imitates life with bedwenches.

Take FKA Twigs with this weekend's "The Crow". I'm watching the shit, fucking jealous because I know it's more than a movie - Twigs gets banged out by dudes with that goth aesthetic on the regular.

I rock that aesthetic too, but I dont have caucazoid ethnic makeup, so I'm out of the running.

And Twigs is a tastemaker, so this is one of the big reason why couples at places of art, where I should feel comfortable in - never are because I have to deal with the fact that I as a male am painted to be invisible in these forms of media, while my female mulatto counterpart is constantly whored out.

Same weekend Zoe Kravitz drops "Blink Twice" starring her fiancee' as an Epstein-type elitist who serial rapes POC women on his private island.

There wasn't one caucazoid woman in the entire cast.

This is Kravitz vision.

This is her vision when she climbs in to bed with Tatum too, right? Because they got together while the film was in production. Guess she liked what she saw in him.

American cinema continues to be a nightmare for mulatto males such as myself. We dont even exist in these fucking films.

Heavily melaninated negroids always want to compare themselves as having the short end of the stick in European society, but at least their in movies (in "The Crow" there was Peter Mensah, Paul Maynard) with possible opportunities for a John David Washington situation in "Tenet" opposite Elizabeth Debicki.

Tatum gets "Blink Twice" and "Fly Me To The Moon" with Scarlet Johannesson.

Zendaya had two caucazoid's fighting over her earlier this year in "The Challengers".

What the fuck does the mulatto male have? Justice Smith. Who never gets the girl, not even in "Dungeons & Dragons" and followed that up by having Fred Durst be his stepdad and wore a fucking dress in "I Saw The T.V. Glow".

I hate the trope in Euro-ran media that puts their males over my females but erases males like myself - the result of their copopulation whether directly or a generation or several removed.

All this inclusion bullshit, but in Euro-ran American cinema all the caucazoid cares to do is maintain power over negroid females, and the negroid females like to create and star in movies where they play into that power fantasy because females are just like caucazoid males - all about getting their's and attempting to harness power over everyone else's.

All the times I ever was with a female of my ethnic makeup was for a night. In Western society I can never expect to have a relationship with a woman that mirrors me ethnically thanks to being attacked by mass media like this.

i look forward to being in lands where Nollywood runs rampant, and my birthplace which birthed the Hollywood film market will become nothing more than a foreign export. Such as I plan to be since films like these made by or with women who resemble me have been another nail in Western societies coffin to make me a foreigner in my own land.

-

C.V.R. The Bard

25th/Aug.2k24

[the-lone-writer94]

Youth & Whiskey

For the anon :) I hope you enjoy this little piece.

Rex Brown x Female Reader

Summary: Set in 1988, you (female reader) have been going out with Rex for a month now. He's everything you could possibly imagine, he's patient and sweet. You've just never gone all the way with him, or anyone for that matter, will Rex be the first?

Age rating: 18+

Word count: 2,855

25th November 1988

Somewhere in Fort Worth, Texas. 

I coughed violently as the thick layer of artificial fog clouded the air around me, leaving a bitter taste at the back of my throat. I pressed down onto my chest as I continued to cough, hoping that it’ll somehow push out the taste. 

“Jeez, Crystal-” I managed to release the words from my lips. 

Crystal paused, setting down the can of hairspray on the table. “I need it to keep my hair in place.” She said, as she lowered herself down towards the mirror as she poked at her beehive curly hair that stood about six inches. Her hand patted against the table that was sprawled with makeup and music magazines. Crystal managed to locate her red lipstick as she carefully painted it across her lips. “Seriously, you couldn’t have asked Rex to send a car or something?” 

Whilst Crystal was my best friend in the entire world, there were moments where she certainly made me question some of my life choices. 

I sighed. “He did offer to pick us up, but I didn’t want him to do that. He’s got a lot of prep before the show.” I explained, then added, “plus I don’t feel comfortable using him like that.”

“Oh come on, you’ve been going out with him for a month now.” Crystal whined. 

I had met Rex at a party which Crystal had dragged me to, at some dirty club which I was so paranoid of touching anything. She had been going on about this badass band called Pantera, which frankly wasn’t necessarily my cup of tea. I was more of a Suzi Quatro and Fleetwood Mac sort of a girl. So I didn’t even realize just what a big deal it was that Rex, the bassist of the band had asked me out. 

“It’s not even that far. We’ll be fine.” 

Crystal shrugged. “I guess so,” then added, “but please get Rex to introduce me to Phil.” 

“Phil?” 

Crystal spun around, her mouth dropped open. “Phil! The new sexy lead singer… how do you not know that?” 

I cocked my head to the side. “I don’t know.” I murmured. 

“Seriously, what do you and Rex even talk about?” She asked, then shook her head. “Never mind. I guess there wouldn’t be a whole lot of talking involved.” She said, and smirked. 

I averted my gaze, my cheeks flushing bright red. I had never actually told Crystal that I still haven’t gone all the way yet, with Rex or with anybody. Rex was incredibly understanding and patient, but there was always a sliver of me that felt it probably wasn’t enough. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to, there just never seemed to be a perfect time. 

The distance between us also didn’t aid our relationship. Rex was constantly on the road, and what little time we managed to share was often cut short. 

“I’ve heard of the famous trailer and how he brings girls in there to… you know.” Crystal teased, as she raised her eyebrows. 

“Hey, come on-” I said, changing the subject, “you ready to go? I want to at least say hi to Rex before he goes on stage.” 

“Yeah, yeah. You can say hi to your boyfriend.” She said, as she rolled her eyes and waved her hand nonchalantly. 

—---

We finally managed to make our way to the Savvy, after we had secured a parking spot about five blocks away from the club. However, the moment we had gotten backstage, Crystal had immediately stopped complaining. 

I snake my way through the sea of bodies as my gaze tries to locate Rex, with Crystal at least several paces ahead of me. She was like a child in a candy store, with a huge smile that flashed across her face as she tried to locate her next prey. 

“Oh my god, Phil!” Crystal screamed. 

Phil flinched and staggered backwards. “Hi.” He said nervously. 

I stepped beside Crystal and lowered myself towards her ear. “Be cool.” I whispered. 

“Of course.” Crystal said. 

“Where’s Rex?” I asked Phil.

“He just stepped outside.” Phil answered, as he gestured towards the fire exit in the corner of the room. 

“Thanks.” I responded, as I spun on my heels. 

“You have such big muscles.” Crystal said in the far distance.

I smirked, as I continued to push my way through towards the back. After several moments, I finally reached the end of the room, as I pushed the heavy duty doors. 

Rex’s body was leaned up against the wall, as he reached his hand towards his face and took a drag of his cigarette. Rex had taken off his shirt, revealing his hairy chest and a trail of dark hair that extended down his stomach. I bit my lower lip, thinking about where that trail of hair would lead to. He wore tight black pants with a wide belt fashioned with a huge metal belt buckle and metal plates surrounding it. His long beautiful brown hair reached down to his waist, the top part of his hair was slightly teased with hairspray and his bangs had slightly covered his eyes. 

Immediately, my fingers tingled, wanting to run my fingers through his hair, but soon fought the temptation. 

“Hey.” I said. 

“Hey baby,” he said as he towered over me, as he stepped forward and wrapped his arm behind my neck, pulling me closer towards him. He leaned down and planted a kiss on my lips. “I’m glad you made it.” 

“Yeah, it took us ages to find a parking spot though. We parked all the way by the bodega.” 

“You should have let me come get you and Crystal before. She’s probably gonna complain isn’t she?”

“Nah, it’s fine. Plus she always complains.”

Rex chuckled. “She does, doesn’t she.” 

“When are you guys on?” 

“Any minute now.” He said, as his fingers caressed the side of my cheek and he tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear. I felt my face flush. “After the show, do you wanna hang somewhere?” 

My heart skipped a beat. “Hmm, yeah I guess.” 

He must have somehow detected the hesitancy in my tone, as he immediately interjected. “Obviously only if you want to- or we could just hang with the guys, drink some beer. Vinnie’s most likely gonna order a buttload of pizzas.” 

“No, of course Rex… I want to be with you.” 

Rex smiled, as he lowered himself and planted another kiss on my lips. “Alright then. Time for the Cowboys to go onstage.” He said. 

—---

“That was so fucking amazing!” Crystal screamed at the top of her lungs. 

I pressed down onto my ears as the ringing had still continued to pound. “It was cool- but shit, I think I lost my hearing.” 

“Worth it though.” Crystal said, “and did you see. Phil totally pointed at me.” 

“Sure.” I said, as my eyes narrowed. I didn’t have the heart to burst her bubble, after all there were about several hundred other people in that club.  

“We gotta hang out with the band now.” 

“Rex said we might go somewhere.” I added. 

Crystal raised her eyebrows. “Of course,” she said and smirked. 

“Stop it.” 

“I guess, I don’t have to wait up for you tonight,” she said, then added, “actually you probably shouldn’t wait up for me either.”

“Why?” 

Crystal cleared her throat. “Depending if Phil wants to go somewhere too.” 

“Sure,” I answered, trying to hide the skepticism behind my voice. 

Moments later, we found ourselves hanging out backstage. Rex and I were propped down onto the couch, my legs draped across his legs as his hand caressed my bare thighs. 

Crystal was nowhere to be seen, most definitely she was probably following Phil as if he were her target and she was like some fucking Terminator. 

The overlapped sounds of chatter filled the room, drowning out the sound of the music that seeped out from the speakers, then  followed by a cloud of cigarette smoke that hung in the air. 

“How did you like the show?” Rex asked. 

“It was great. My hearing is slowly coming back.” I said. 

He released a low chuckle. 

Nervously, I continued to chug at the drink from a red plastic cup. Crystal had made her famous drink which she liked to call the ‘kitchen sink’, which was a little bit of every alcohol ever known to man, mixed into one disgusting putrid liquid. I had never enjoyed drinking them, although the act of having something to do gave myself some sort of ease. 

After all, parties were never necessarily my scene. It had taken Crystal long amounts of begging for me to even attend the party a month ago when I had met Rex. 

All of a sudden, I downed the entire contents of the drink, immediately feeling the acidic burn course through me, poisoning my insides. 

My vision began to blur, as I felt the effects of the alcohol possessing over my body. 

“Are you okay?” Rex asked. 

I nodded. 

Abruptly, my hands found its way towards Rex’s face as my fingers traced his jawline, then they moved its way to his hair as I twirled the ends of his hair and giggled. 

“Are you drunk?” He asked, with a smirk painted across his face. 

“A little bit.” I said and snickered. 

“I think we need to get you out of here.” He said, as he removed himself from the couch, and I slithered down like a snake. 

Rex wrapped his arms around my waist as he pulled me up in one swift motion. His hands gripped down onto my sides as he held me close to his body. I felt his hot breath graze my skin, and all I could possibly think was to press my lips against him. 

“Come on.” He said softly, as he guided me through the bodies and towards the exit. 

Once we had stepped into the parking lot, the night breeze brushed at my skin, and I immediately shivered. 

“Where are we going?” I said, and noticed my words had slurred. 

“Getting you some rest.” 

“But, I want to go back to the party.” I whined. 

“Maybe later once you’ve had a lie down.” 

“Will you lie with me?” I said, and laughed. 

“You’re drunk.” He said. 

“Shhh,” I said, then burst into laughter. 

We reached a trailer, as my footing stumbled. Rex grabs onto me tighter as he hoists me back up. Before me underneath the gleaming parking lot lights, a busted up white trailer with blue lines on the bottom is parked amongst a row of vans and cars. 

“Oh my gosh, is this the trailer?” I asked. 

“What?” Rex responded, as his brows furrowed. 

Rex stepped towards the trailer and yanked the door open, as he assisted me into crawling up the stairs. 

The interior of the trailer was pretty much what I had expected to look. If it hadn’t been for the mountainful of stuff sprawled in every inch of the trailer, it would have been rather spacious. On the right hand side of the trailer was a built-in bench with a hardwood table that was covered in knife markings, a small cooker and cabinets were on the other side of the trailer, although I was pretty certain the boys had never once tried to cook anything. Then, in the far distance I eyed the bed, with an array of blankets and duvets. Immediately, my cheeks flushed. 

 I crawled further into the trailer, as my shoes stepped over empty beer bottles, and takeout boxes. The stench of cigarettes and whiskey lingered in the air, and my nose twitched.

I slumped down onto the bed, trying to push the images of what may have happened on this very spot. 

Rex lowered himself beside me as I found my head pounding, my vision blurred and the world around me began to spin.  

Suddenly, I drew closer towards him, the sweat which matted against his hair was almost drying now, as I ran my fingers through his hair. Our gazes locked, and he lowered his face towards me, his hands reached up towards me  as he cupped each side of my face. 

Our lips found its way towards one another, as he deepened the kiss. My lips parted and he slipped his tongue into mine, as our tongues danced. My breathing quickened, as my arms wrapped around his neck, then my hands found its way down his chest as I dug my fingernails into him. I wasn’t sure how much pressure I had applied, as he didn’t so much as flinch, but I knew it’ll leave a mark, which it turned me on even more, almost as if it were showing the whole world that he belonged to me. 

Rex’s fingers grazed against the side of my neck, as he drew them lower caressing the side of my breasts, he gently cupped them and squeezed down onto them. I released a moan, as I deepened the kiss.

I shifted in my position, raising one leg over to straddle Rex. He pulled me closer towards him, as we continued to make out.  

Then, his hands lowered down my waist before resting them on my thighs. Slowly, his hand slipped higher, as he reached down underneath my skirt, squeezing down onto my ass, then his fingers hooked into the waistband of my skirt as I felt him try to pull them down. 

All of a sudden, consciousness waved over me, pushing me back into reality. I flinched, immediately removing myself from Rex, as I pulled back and sat beside him. 

“I’m sorry,” I said, as I buried my face into my hands. 

Fear washed over him, as he shuddered, “I didn’t mean to- I’m sorry, I got carried away. I know you’re not ready.” 

“No, Rex. I want to,” I affirmed.

“Are you sure?” He asked softly. 

I nodded. “I’ve just never…” I trailed off, and paused. 

His hand reached up towards my face as he cupped the side of my face, he leaned in and planted a kiss on my lips. “It’s okay.” He said, his hot breath upon my skin. 

I allowed Rex to deepen the kiss as he gently lowered me down onto the bed, he towered over me as his long beautiful locks brushed against my skin. He pushed his hair aside, as his fingers trailed down the side of my neck, and then tracing over my collarbone. His fingers hooked onto the straps of my top as he pushed them down, which revealed my breasts. His hands cupped them, as his hands trailed down my body, resting upon the waistband of my skirt. 

“Can I?” He asked. 

I nodded. 

Gently, he pulled down my skirt, which exposed my pink panties with florals on it. Feeling embarrassed, I closed my legs together. 

He released a low chuckle. “This is cute.” He said, as gently poked at my entrance. 

My cheeks flushed, as he lowered himself, his lips crashing down on mine. He slipped his tongue inside my mouth, as I pressed my tongue against his. I felt the bulge in his pants as he rubbed his lower body against mine. 

My hands trembled as they reached down towards his pants, as I stroked over his bulge. He drew back, and I sat up, my hands extended towards his belt buckle as I fumbled with it. I pulled down his pants revealing his hard cock. He then fumbled underneath the mattress as he drew out a condom, tearing it open with his teeth, he then placed it upon himself. 

With his fingers, he gently rested them on my entrance as he massaged the area. I moaned out in pleasure, as I chewed down on my lower lip. 

“Take them off.” I said, as he then pulled my panties away, casting them aside. 

He then hovered over me, as I slowly felt him entering me. “Is this alright?” He asked. 

I nodded. 

He slowly thrusted against me, as I moaned and cried out his name. My fingers found its way into Rex’s hair, as I tugged and pulled at his hair. He continued to thrust into me in slow and gentle movements. 

He grunted as I watched his hand grip down hard onto the pillow. I moaned, “Rex.” Slowly, I felt the orgasmic pulsating through me. 

Then, Rex removed himself from me as he discarded the now used condom. He sank down beside me, and draped his arm around me. 

“Oh my god.” I moaned into him. 

He planted a kiss on my forehead, as my hand caressed his chest, forming circles with the tip of my finger on his hairy chest. 

We laid together, an entwinement of limbs for several moments, before I finally broke the silence. “We should probably get back to the party.” 

“Yeah? You don’t want to lay here any more?” He asked. 

 “I do, but I’ve been gone for so long, Crystal is probably wondering where I am.” 

“Oh yeah, she might be worried.” 

“Honestly, I’m probably more worried for Phil.” I said, and chuckled. 

[dethkomic]

Writin’ Comics and Junk: Part 4 - Comic Compositionin’ (Part 2)

It sure looks like things have finally begun to pick up in our ongoing saga of heavy metal people and their friends! Things just get more interesting from here, so don't miss the next one!

The next Dethkomic update will be Tuesday, April 25th, 2023!

At this time, I'd like to give a special shout-out to all of you who have offered up your OCs to the Dethkomic overlords! I'm working on getting everyone's cameo appearance into the book for issue #7!

Right now, though, we have another comic book tutorial to share. It'll be a briefer one than usual, today, but covering a very important part of comic book composition, regardless!

The Art of Sequential Direction

Last week, we covered the general aspects of comic book layout, so I thought this week would be a good place to go over the more detailed bits that make up the panels in a page. Check it out below the cut!

Take a look at the two page layouts, below. Which is more interesting to your eye, at first glance?

The first page doesn't offer much in the way of variety, while the second page is chalk full of it -- it's not hard to understand why the second example looks and feels more exciting to read.

One of the things I tell creatives who are starting out in comics, who usually are coming from a background that's full of one-off pieces of art and very little sequential work, is that comic books -- especially action/adventure comic books, work best if you look at them through a director's eye.

This was one of the first things that was told to me as a young comic book artist and fan, and it's something of a never-ending journey. I love to watch movies and shows while my mind picks apart what the director was trying to convey in the way the camera was set, how the scene pans or stays still, what music was playing, how the dialogue carries -- all of it! Comics may not have as many moving parts as a movie, but you can probably guess that when it comes to conveying emotion through scene-setting, they are basically the same.

Just like the movies, comics have some ground rules that can help you make them more inviting and simultaneously exciting for your readers. Each one of these isn't terribly hard to do, but you'll be amazed at the impact they can have on your comic. I have three very, very simple ones that you can do, immediately:

Change the Size of Your Characters.

The above advice was handed to me in the same era, if not the same week, if not the same sentence as the advice about looking at your story as a director. One of the easiest things you can do and indeed, one of the most important things you can do -- before you even start to get a grasp on what types of scenes evoke what type of mood (we'll get to that...) --is to change how big or how small your characters appear, panel to panel. Basically -- pan the camera out, or in. Your readers' eyes will be far more likely to stay focused on what's being said and what's happening, if the scene changes just a little bit in this way.

Change the Camera Angle.

That horizon line that tells us where the end of the world is? The one that separates the ground from the sky? Move it up or down, chief. That's it. That's all there is to this one. Sure sets the scene differently, doesn't it? Notice how your characters, no matter what size you drew them, now look either really big (if your horizon line is low) or really small (if the line is up high) in the panel. That's what we wanna see -- make those guys change size!

Change the Panel's Tilt.

Okay, so now some of your characters are really big on the panel while others are small, and your horizon is way up, way down, or completely off the panel! Good work. Now pick one or two panels and turn them at a 45 degree angle. Or a 90 degree angle. Or if you're really bold and are making some kind of statement, turn them upside-down. Especially the panels where you're going to have trouble fitting the necessary dialogue balloons in -- this is a great trick to find yourself some more space.

Now that you have those down, you have a go-to for when you are just dragging it on finishing a page. Especially the pages that don't offer any particular points of interest and are just there to move the story to its next, more interesting part (shoeleather, as they're sometimes called). Even boring pages can be made way more interesting with the use of those three easy tricks.

Getting into the nitty-gritty, comic book professionals have a wide variety of shots that we typically fall back on when it comes to directing our stories. Each one can be used for different purposes, and to convey a different message. Another piece of advice given to me early on, was to treat my comic pages as if I had to tell the same story that was written out, but without the dialogue. If I could do that -- if I could look at what I'd drawn and get a good impression of what has happened without the characters saying a single word -- that was a good indication of a successful page.

So what are these types of shots and how do we use them? While this is by no means a complete list (Just google "types of comic book shots" or similar), I'll do my best to examine some of the more common ones, and give examples:

The Establishing Shot:

In the above example, we can see that Nathan is head of the table, in Charles' usual spot. Dethklok is on one side, Baen-Shee is on the other, and Toki isn't shown, but that's the joke -- he's so far away his speech balloon is coming from off-panel. Murderface is conspicuously absent. Establishing shots are important because they show the reader, at a glance, where everyone is and where they are in relation to one another and their environment. You should strive to have one establishing shot per-scene. Some people say per-page, and I think that's also good advice, if not a little extra work.

The Long Shot:

Oftentimes, long shots are establishing shots. The camera is far enough away from the subject that it gets most of/all of their whole body in the panel, as well as a good chunk of the environment. This gives both entities equal "weight" in the storytelling. What's that? Did I just call the background an entity? I sure did! Remember that.

The Medium Shot:

A pretty standard shot. Here's a guy. He's talking now. Maybe he's saying something important, and maybe he isn't. Whatever is happening, it's not doing it with great impact, and that's the point. Use these basic halfway-up-the-body angles when you're just establishing that something is being said or done, and by whom.

The Close Up:

Now it's getting interesting. We're zeroed in on one or two characters' faces to the point that we're forced to consider their facial expressions above all else. Must be some real tension going down, here.

The Extreme Long Shot:

Hey! Where'd my freaking house go??? Sometimes the environment is more important than the characters in it.

As I said, these are but a small sampling of all that's available to you as a comic book creator, when setting the scenes in your story. Next we meet, I'll go into some of my thought process when it comes to putting a page together and how I'm making decisions regarding the flow of the story, transitioning, layout, and more.

See you then!