#and load the dishwasher

[simplyghosting]

hellooo what's one thing you always do after getting back home for the day?

Immediately guzzle down at least 16oz of water and then pass out usually

[newoozi]

your new friend vernon is walking you home one night, telling you all about the date his mom is setting him up on in an attempt to “get out there more”. he admits it’s been a while since he’s taken somebody on a date, and he’s sort of nervous and half dreading it. he doesn’t even have any idea what he’s going to wear.

the two of you reach the front of your apartment building, and you face to look at him. placing your hands on his shoulders you teasingly say, “wear that navy blue polo shirt of yours. it almost makes you look nice.”

he huffs out a small laugh in response, but the truth is he’s sort of spiraling. you notice what he’s wearing beyond an aesthetic sense? do you pay attention to how the shirt fits him perfectly, how it hugs at his chest and shows off his arms? of course, vernon knows he’s attractive — people swoon over him on the daily, and many times he can get away with not paying for ramen at the convenience store if the girl at the counter is young. but, it never crossed his mind that you thought about him in that way. it was different with you, wasn’t it?

he thinks about that, and you, on the way back to his dorm.

you text him to ask about his date the next night, the curiosity getting the better of you.

how was ur date? did she appreciate the polo?

he admits he didn’t wear the polo, but doesn’t offer any explanation as to why. he adds that the date was going fine until they were saying goodbye and she went in for a kiss on the cheek and he held out his hand. he probably won’t see her again.

you laugh out loud at his message.

when it’s your birthday a week later, he wears the polo to the casual dinner you host at your place with your closest friends. he notices when your eyes linger on his lean figure, and the way you blush when you know you’ve been caught. you’re almost sure he’s worn it on purpose.

[theriverbeyond]

John is the kind of guy who would set up a Mithraeum chore chart but I know for a fact that G1deon was doing all the work. that man was like christ on the cross

[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

autistics cohabiting means having the conversation “i really appreciate you helping me with [task], but unfortunately you did it Wrong. I have a System™, and since i don’t want to force the intricate neuroses of my System™ upon you, in the future please just let me do it. thanks.”

[orkidays]

gia jamming to paranoid

[shoezuki]

Theresbeen many a drunk headcanon and they be fun and funky but it got me thinking bout clumsiness outside of bein drunk.

Gepard seems very sure-footed. He's the captain of the guard, always leading, never showing hesitation lest it brings nerves upon his troops. I don't think he's some sorta balance god but I do think he's a steady guy that isn't really bumping into anything.

Sampo gives off cat vibes to me, I can imagine him scuttling up a wall jus to tiptoe across its top as if it was nothing. He's doin lil hops and skips just to show off a little. Whilst Geppie is strong in his stance and motion, Sampo is graceful but not really in a delicate way? He's got the smugness of a cat but his grace is more akin to an elk. It's got weight behind it but you can tell he's not fallin anytime soon.

But I like to think he's extremely used to having everything mapped out. He has places for everything and whilst it doesn't at all look neat, he knows exactly where everything is.

His coffee table is always crooked but he simply bends out of the way as he walks past, head in a stack of documents. There's stuff all over the floor but he's tiptoeing between them without hesitation. He has cabinets full of anything and everything, look in them and god knows what his file sorting system is but you ask for something specific and he makes a beeline for the bottom left drawer, stuffs his hand to the back and pulls it out instantly.

With Gep, he's also orderly. He knows where everything is but because it's neat. Even his pens are organised by colour and use. He's not a neat-freak, he's just grown up to always put things back where he found it when he's done and having shared sleepin spaces for so long with fellow soldiers, knows that keeping everything in its place makes things less stressful.

He knows better than to mess with Sampo's files or move any of his 'work' stuff but he's defo moving tidbits off the floor and pushing furniture back against the wall. Like, why is the sofa in the middle of the room??? How does someone do that in the first place???

So now Sampo, as aware and confident as he is, is now tripping over everything. He's knocked his shin on the coffee table 3 times in one day. He's stubbed his toe on the sofa and fully fallen to the ground, he's gone to grab something off the floor (where it usually is) only to realise it's no longer there and just stand in the middle of the room, looking lost, staring into space for 5 minutes.

He feels like he's been invaded. Never had to shrug off Natasha's questioning so often when she comments on a new bruise or scrape. He's not even getting them on the field!!!! That stool was perfectly fine in front of the cupboard. That's where he liked it.

But like hell is he gonna tell Gepard that. He's tried to some extent but it's only led to long circle talk. After all, it's unsurprisingly hard to explain that you like your furniture layout to look like someone's lost a fight in your home and having things not in the way is mildly disturbing.

This was meant to be about clumsiness. They're gettin away from me again XD

~ 🥃

YesyesyesYES SBGDV god they both have like. Theyre own sense of order. Like gepard's is the most blatant. Hes got a Schedule ok he has an order to how he does things and when he does things and where stuff goes.

But sampo seems Chaotic. Like his things seem to be a mess and all disjointed and over the place but To Him he has like. A System. He has no fucking clue what that system is and can Not explain it whatsoever but hes got it. Sure its a mess and no one knows how he can possible operate like this and especially concerning his bomb making its crazy he hasnt blown himself up yet but it Works.

Them living together is Hilarious cuz if this. Like gepard needs things where theyre 'supposed' to be, while sampo shifts his things n environment according to Him. Mfers in a silent war cuz they keep moving shit back to where They think its sposed to be. Like sampo keeps shifting the coffee table to the left and at a bit of an angle so that he can rest his feet on it from the sofa but gep keeps moving it back cuz its Supposed To Be Exactly 2 feet from the sofa and Right in the middle of the fucking rug, sampo. Every late night sampo moves the dishes around seemingly randomly so that his favourite bowls and mugs are easily reachable while he cooks and every morning gepard gets up and reorganizes the cupboards by size and type of dish while he makes coffee.

Theyre engaging in domestic psychological warfare

[microwave-core]

Girl Dinner

Cynthia x Fem! Reader

Cynthia was always so busy, even during your dates. But every now and then, she finds a way to make it up to you.

“-Yeah, about that… Work’s keeping me late tonight. A new challenger arrived a few minutes ago, so I’m not off the hook until they are gone.”

“Oh, I see… Well, I’ll be waiting for you at home, then. Just let me know when you’re on your way so that I can get dinner warmed up for you.”

“You don’t need to do that, babe, I might be out pretty late. I’ll make sure to text when I leave, but don’t feel the need to stay up for my sake.”

You pause, unsure of how to respond for a second. You unconsciously tap the phone next to your ear with your fingers, hoping to hide your disappointment at the unfortunate news your girlfriend bestowed upon you. A quiet sigh passes through your lips, your name coming from the other side of the phone recapturing your attention.

“Hey, I know that we haven’t had time to ourselves recently, but I’ll make sure to spend as much time as possible with you the second I have free time, okay?” 

“It’s not your fault that you have to work late, love, but I’ll be looking forward to it… so make sure to kick their ass for me.” Cynthia’s laugh, even muffled through the phone, is enough to bring a smile back onto your face. 

“Ha! The kid’s only at Bertha right now, but if they make their way up to me, I’ll make sure to win, just for you. Love you.”

“I love you, too.” Another sigh drops from your lips, as you gently lower your phone to the kitchen counter below. You meant what you said, that it wasn’t her fault she was stuck at work, nor was it her fault for being busy with important archeological studies, nor was there much she could do to stop people from approaching her in public for pictures, or autographs, or battles, or whatnot…

But you couldn’t help but be a little disappointed whenever it happened. You felt bad about it, incredibly bad about it, but you couldn’t fend off the feeling, and Cynthia knew that intimately, as well, and knowing that made you feel a tiny bit worse. The odd pang in your heart weighed down by selfishness.

Because it was selfish to feel that way, in your mind, at least, even if Cynthia told you otherwise. Even when she told you that you’re allowed, if not entitled, to be selfish at times in your relationship, that you have the right to be disappointed when your plans get interrupted, even if it’s not your lover’s fault.

You push yourself away from the counter, wrapping up your girlfriend’s dinner to be placed in the fridge, busy to get your mind off of things for a moment, less you droop over the poor counter feeling bad for yourself until the light of your life came home. The dishes stacked in the sink never seemed so welcoming.

Rolling up your sleeves, you can’t help but let your mind wander back to Cynthia. Thinking about her is a normal activity for you, sure, but when your mind gets muddled with negativity, it’s difficult to trudge out of it in full. Normally, you could distract yourself with thoughts of your wonderful dates, but now it was hard to gleam over how many of them end.

Thinking about the picnic you two had last week, you smile at the memory of how the sun glinted in her eyes and how it reflected, almost blindingly so, off of her blonde hair, and the playful banter you exchanged while laying in the warmth of the sun, both outstretched on the soft blanket below, but you can’t help but remember how it ended, with her receiving a sudden call from work, prompting her to leave suddenly, followed by countless apologies.

You could also think about the times that you went out into town, to get food or to see a movie or to go shopping or to the museum or anything else of note, only to be stopped by fans, approaching with wide smiles and shocked expressions, asking for her attention for a few moments. She made the effort to keep interactions short and sweet, not wanting to take away time for your date, but she was too kind to just shoo them away outright (not that you would ask her to do so).

Arceus above, what you would give to spend time outside with her with no interruptions. Sure, you could always spend time in the confines of your home, where no prying eyes could see you, where you both opened up fully, vulnerable, to one another, and you loved those times immensely, but you would love to explore dates outside of said walls, to date like normal people do, without fame or influence. 

Even then, though, you’d still give a lot for her to come home earlier than midnight, whether she be wrapped up in the league or out of the region to look at fancy ruins, to spend time wrapped in each other’s arms, talking quietly in bed, as if the world itself would hear anything above a whisper. To spend time with each other, with no regards to the time slipping you by or the dishes in the sink. 

…But, to be fair, there are a lot of things you would rather be doing than putting sponge to dish, then hands under scalding water. It helped time pass, at least, because sooner rather than later, Cynthia would be home, and you’d have her dinner pulled out already, and sit with her as she talks about her day, about this hot shot challenger trying to snatch her crown during the dark of night. 

Once she was back, you’d talk all you liked, until you would practically push her to bed, knowing about the weariness that’d settled into her bones from a long day. And for now, that would do. Seeing each other each night and each early morning would hold your attention quota for the time being, and in time you’d both have your chance to pull away from everyone else and focus on nothing but each other, just as your relationship has always gone.

“Are you sure-”

“Yes, I’m positive, everything is going to go perfectly, dear.” Cynthia stands behind you in the mirror, fingers flowing and cutting through your hair. “You look wonderful, by the way.” “You were the one who asked me to dress my best.” You roll your eyes playfully, but are deeply grateful for the compliment. Cynthia was no slouch, either, deliciously black dress hugging her curves, simultaneously showing too much yet too little skin.

“And you delivered, just like you always do.” She shoots a warm smile your way, locking eyes through the mirror’s reflection, before connecting a thin, metal clasp at the base of your neck, the necklace she had bought for you for your first anniversary. She fiddles with it for a second, admiring her work, before pressing a kiss to your temple. “Now then, are you ready? We wouldn’t want to be late for dinner.” 

“I’m ready thanks to your finishing touch, yeah.” You nod, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear as you exit the bathroom, watching your lover walk to the kitchen and then to the front door, keys in hand. She had told you excitedly the day before about the dinner reservations she had made. It was a fancier place than you were used to, but you couldn’t help the excitement bubbling up in your core.

“Then, let’s get going.” The smile on her face was dangerously contagious, both trodding to the car with pep in your step, albeit with care. It would be an unfortunate end to date night if you were to trip and fall due to clumsiness or a broken heel and end up making out with the concrete of the driveway.

You chat about your day on the drive to the mysterious restaurant she had picked out, having not done so earlier. Typically, that would be the first thing you talked about when both at home, but she was spurring you on to get ready the second she crossed the threshold. It seems like she wanted to keep your mind off of whatever she was planning, and was doing a good job, at the very least, as you have no idea how much time passed between stepping into the car and stepping out of it.

With your hand in hers, she leads you into an elegant building, leading to you admiring the fancy, if not overly expensive, interior, as she talks to the receptionist and, after a short walk, brings you to a table. Looking out the window to your side, you had no idea that you were so high up, off of the ground, until gazing down at the city lights below.

“Well… do you like it? I’ve been looking at this place for some time now, but they’re almost always packed.” Cynthia props herself up on her arm, watching the light twinkling in your eyes.

“It’s beautiful…” The words roll off of your tongue subconsciously. It takes a second to tear your eyes away from the cityscape below and back to your lover, and then to the seats around you. “Are… are we alone?”

“That we are. Getting a room to ourselves wasn’t easy. I had to pull a few strings, but I knew it would be worth it, if nothing but to see your reaction.” Her expression brightens, as if saying ‘and it was worth it’ without needing the words. 

Thankfully, the room wasn’t too large, seeming to be a private venue to be rented out. Otherwise, it would have felt much more awkward, surrounded by empty tables as far as the eye could see. And maybe there was a slight, quiet echo whenever you spoke, but it was hard to care at the moment. Not when the world’s most beautiful woman was at your side.

[oldmanffucker]

amber house parallel. asking Wilson to just Please do something for Himself. to buy whatever mattress HE wants (even if it’s a waterbed). to buy One piece of furniture HE wants. to ask Sam to use a coaster & put the milk in the door and to advocate for HIS needs.

they BOTH care so much about Wilson. they both see that he gives so much to everyone else, to the detriment of his own wellbeing, & beg him 2 keep *himself* in mind sometimes. of course amber does it with a touch of withholding sex & sweet eyes, and of course house pranks/scams/returns all his furniture but still. the motive is the same. the love is the same.

[tj-crochets]

Getting a lot of notes on the grandma post, so grandma update time! I talk to my grandma every day, I call her every morning before breakfast to say hi and get the update on the neighborhood cats she's feeding* and talk about what the both of us are doing every day. A few times a week one of us will call the other later in the day to share a funny story, which led to her saying my dad didn't follow instructions and me saying "Yep, I inherited my inability to follow instructions from both sides", to which she replied "You're doomed, dear" lol *she socializes the kittens and gets them in animal shelters to be adopted as much as she can. She also names almost all of them after characters from old westerns and tells stories about them like it's a soap opera

[isthatafuckinggayangel]

Guy when Honey won’t kiss him: God is real and I am the being he most wishes to see suffer

[b-blushes]

OKAY 2pm i'm going to journal land for real!!!!!

[tethered-heartstrings]

dishwashers and washing machines and dryers take an hour+ a cycle is kind of fucked up for people who have very little motivation/energy and get things done by random and intense spurts of energy where any down/sitting/waiting time will axe the momentum at the throat

[tchaikovskaya]

Even working from home is emotionally bad for you and I will stand by that. “I love the freedom of WFH tho!” The problem here is working (presumably white collar jobs if you can work from home to begin with) for employers who refuse you the freedom to leave the office for urgent non-emergencies or doctors appointments etc etc etc. The problem is the bosses!!! (Or capitalism at large but unless you have a magic wand that could whisk our whole economic system away just like that, as much as i would love for that to happen, that’s not really realistic as a response here!)

[chilikit]

sometimes when people ask me to do tasks without further instruction, i skip past the phase in which i figure out the best way to do it straight to freaking out because i assume that they want me to do it a certain way but i don't know what that way is. so instead of figuring out the best way to complete the task i am trying to figure out how they would want me to complete the task which is much harder and very anxiety-inducing. i guess that's what happens when you get used to being told that you're not doing things right.

[moeblob]

(points at Giacomo) I love him, your honor.