#and looking at all of the polls with older media... yeah

[worstqueerbaittournament]

Hey. Anon who submitted Dracula and Jonathan here. I didn't mean the netflix adaptation, I just meant the book. But I guess what's done is done.

Since Dracula was published in 1897, I would say that absolutely doesn't count as queerbait but at most as queercoded. But we can vote on it.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

All In 7

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, power imbalance, low self esteem, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: you meet a mysterious man on a night out with your sister. (petite!reader)

based on the winning option for this poll

Characters: casino owner!Bucky Barnes

Note: another week...

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

When Bucky leaves, you feel less than relief. It’s easier to breathe without him around but your heart continues to race. You don’t move until you see him drive away. You steel yourself with the manufactured lie before you go back inside. 

As you do, you’re surprised to find Roxie beside your mom, both of them close to the front window. You sigh. Were they watching? You guess you can be thankful Bucky hadn’t done more than talk. 

Your mom faces you with a sheepish grin, “so... did you get it?” 

You look between her and your sister. Roxie has her phone in hand and an arch in her eyebrow, “I’d die for a boss like that.” 

“I...” you glance the screen before she can hide it. Oh. She had a picture of him pulled up on Google. So, they both know exactly who he is. 

“He must be really hands on if he came all the way down here to offer you a job,” Roxie tilts her head. 

“That’s the sign of a good boss,” your mom insists.  

“Really, I think his eyes were the kicker. So blue.” 

“Rox,” your mom nudges her. “A man like him, he’s got line ups, I’m sure. Besides, she’s too young for him.” 

“Well, I’m older,” Roxie smirks, “maybe she can get me a job too.” 

“Er, uh,” you wring your hands, “I should start dinner.” 

“You didn’t say if you go the job,” Roxie challenges. 

“Yeah,” you utter softly, “I got a job. Just cleaning.” 

“Hey, it’s better than nothing,” you mom assures as she comes to you. She puts her hands on your shoulders, “I’m so proud of you.” 

“Mom,” you try not to look pained as you return her smile, “it’s nothing. Really. A cleaner.” 

“We all gotta start somewhere.” 

“Yeah,” Roxie scoffs, “most of us a lot sooner.” 

“Oh, don’t be such a downer,” your mom lets you go to spin on your sister, “don’t rain on her parade.” 

“Whatever. I’d rather hand out flyers than clean toilets,” she rolls her eyes. 

You purse your lips and shy away. You feel worse that they believe you so easily and why wouldn’t they? No one would think that someone like you would merit such a preposterous offer from a man like Bucky. You still can’t really believe it. 

Maybe it’s just some twisted hallucination. You could wake up tomorrow and be just like you were before. You never thought you would long for that but now, being alone, being the loser, that feels safe. Being noticed, being someone, that’s terrifying. 

🃏

You take your time making dinner, a brief escape from reality. The distraction keeps you busy enough that your chest stops thrumming, yet your nerves are still spastic. You’re not very hungry once it’s done but you make yourself eat. 

Roxie heads off for work shortly after you gather up the dirty dishes and your mom goes to change into her pajamas. She startles you as you scour the pan you used to bake the chicken. You splash yourself and hiss. 

“Sorry, hon, I was just coming to check on you,” she leans against the counter, “you’re nervous, aren’t you?” 

You shrug, to fraught to answer. 

“You get restless, I can tell. You do everything just to keep from fidgeting,” she says, “it’s going to be okay. You’ll be just fine and you’ll see, it’ll be nice to have your own money.” 

“I know, mom,” you murmur, turning your face down to the sink, “it’s not that I don’t want to work, I just... I guess it’s the change that freaks me out.” 

“Change is good, even if it’s scary,” she says. “You’ll see.” 

“Mm,” you hum and try not to shatter, “I just want to help out.” 

“Hon, you worry about yourself. Please--” 

“No, I owe you.” 

“Owe me? I’m your mother. I just wish I could give you more,” she smiles and squeezes your arm. “If you’re not some busy working girl, we’ll celebrate on my day off.” 

“Sure,” you accept grimly. 

She leaves you and you’re silent as you finish up the dishes. You put them away and wipe the counters. When you finish, you shut off the lights. You say good night from the doorway and retreat into your room. Tomorrow. That’s all he said. That’s the only detail you go before he strolled off. 

You grab your phone and fall back on your bed. All you want is to lose yourself in a fic or a discussion board or even just scrolling mindlessly. You can’t. It’s like he’s taking over everything. There it is, that little icon you rarely see, a new message.  

You pull down the menu and stare at the preview. Two hours ago. You’re surprised he didn’t show up to check why you hadn’t answered. Again. You will at least need to send something before the night is over. 

‘Hey doll. I’ll send a car tomorrow morning at nine. Just bring yourself.’ 

You shudder and stare at the blue bubble around the text. Oof. Nine? That’s early for you. You suppose it’s about time you break that bad habit. 

‘Sorry. I was making dinner. Nine is good. Thank you.’ 

You hit send and put your phone down. You slide your laptop across the bed and open it up. You’ll watch something. That old BBC drama you found on the free streaming service has been pretty interesting, but you think you only have one episode left. That’s good, you can’t be up all night. 

Your phone buzzes. Shoot. Alright. You can do this. You have to get to it. You swipe up your phone again, surprised to find it’s still shaking.

Oh no. He’s calling! 

You panic and nearly hit decline before you manage to drag your thumb the other way. You put the phone to your ear, unable to muster even a squeak. What do you say? 

“Hey, doll,” Bucky’s voice drawls from the speaker, “hope I didn’t interrupt dinner.” 

“No, er, we’re done.” 

“Ah, and are you alone?” 

You frown, “yes?” 

“Good, good. Isn’t that sweet of you, cooking dinner for your family. That’s what I like about you. You take care of those you love.” 

You gulp. You don’t know what to say. 

“What was for dinner?” He asks as you hear a soft rustle. 

“Um, chicken and potatoes,” you answer bluntly. It’s an easy question. 

“You’re not busy or something?” He wonders. 

“Uh uh,” you shake your head even though he can’t see, “I’m just... in bed.” 

“Early night, huh?” He asks. 

“I guess, I was going to watch a show.” 

“Right, right,” he clicks his tongue as something taps followed by other indiscernible movements, “you in your pajamas? Bet those are cute?” 

“Not... yet,” you croak. 

“Mmm,” he purrs, “I just got out of the shower.” 

“You... did?” 

“Getting ready for tomorrow,” he explains, “gotta admit, I’m a bit impatient. You’ll see that about me, doll. When I want something, it’s hard to wait.” 

“Uh, oh...” you stutter out. 

“For you, I can,” he vows, “doll, do me a favour.” 

“A favour?” You echo thinly. 

“Mmm, yeah, I want you to get in your pajamas and send me a picture. Just to tide me over,” he coaxes. 

“A picture?” You open your eyes wide and gape at the wall. 

“Sure, just a taste. I wanna know what I should imagine next to me when I lay down.” 

“What?” You squeak, shocked by his insinuation. Imagining you?! 

“I can’t help myself. It’s lonely here.” 

“I...” you pick at your lower lip, “one sec. I... I gotta...” 

You put the phone on the bed and push yourself off the mattress. You trip on your own feet and hope he can’t hear you stumbling around. Your pajamas are kind of silly. You don’t really have any sexy ones. Maybe if he sees them, he’ll change his mind. 

The only matching pair you have have snoopy on the top and a large check bottom on the pants. You fish them out and change. It’s okay. He can’t see you at that moment. Still, it feels like he is watching you. Just as his presence has lurked around you all day. 

You go back to your phone and fumble around, “sorry, I... just... figuring out the camera.” 

You hear his timbre but can’t make out his words from the small speaker. You open the camera app and flip the camera. You move around, trying to take the pic, and lean the phone on the top of your dress. You angle it and mutter to yourself as you struggle to set the timer. 

You take several pictures before you’re not entirely discontent. You look awkward in all of them. The pants, like all your pants, are too long and gather around your feet. You don’t know how to pose either. Quite frankly, you look frightened in every single one. 

“Alright, I think...” you babble and find your way into the conversation and choose the least egregious frame. You hesitate and close your eyes as you push your thumb down on the arrow. 

You bring the phone back to your ear, “are you still there?” 

“Always, doll,” he assures and once more, the phone shifts around noisily. “Mm, Snoopy? I like it. More of a Woodstock myself but... Mm mm mm, you look good.” He pauses as you wriggle and your cheeks burn hotly. “Sexy.” 

“No,” you burst out without thinking. 

“No? You don’t think I’m telling the truth?” 

“I didn’t... say so, it’s... just pajamas,” you sniff, “sorry, I didn’t mean to argue.” 

“Doll, relax. Thing about you, you don’t even have to try.” 

You don’t reply. You have no idea what to say or even if you should believe him. You saw the picture, you look in the mirror every day, you know what you are. It still feels like some weird game. 

“Here, gimme a sec,” he says from his end. 

More rustling and the noise of a digital shutter. Your phone vibes shortly and you pull it away from your cheek. You squint at the screen as it lights up and an image buffers in the conversation. 

“Huh, uh, it’s not loading. My phone is--” you nearly swallow your tongue and gasp. 

Oh gosh. It’s a picture of him in almost nothing. Just a towel. His long hair is damp and pushed back and his dark beard contrasts his bright blue eyes as he aims the lens of his phone at himself in the mirror. His stomach is ridged with muscle, his chest trimmed with hair that trails down, and the towel hangs low, giving a generous hint of his pelvis. The vee above the fabric feels overly salacious. 

“Doll?” You hear the low tone of his voice and make yourself look away. You raise the phone again to your ear. “Everything okay? You got really quiet.” 

“I...” 

“You like what you see?” He asks coyly. 

You put your hand to your forehead, your flesh is fiery. It’s so much so fast. Just that morning, you’d convinced yourself you would never see or talk to him again. And now he’s sending you pictures like that and... flirting with you? 

“Yes,” you eke out then cover your mouth. He snickers and you clear your throat before you peel your hand away, “sorry, I mean... you’re... you... you must work out.” 

“Doll, you’re too adorable,” he says. 

You don’t say a word. You’re mortified. He knew you saw that. He knows you’ve seen him like that. He sent it! 

It’s all too much. You’re lightheaded. You rub your chin and shiver. 

“I should... sleep.” 

“Mm, me too,” he says, “hopefully I dream of you.” 

You giggle nervously, “really?” 

“Sure, doll. All I can do is dream. Until tomorrow,” he sighs, “and what about you? You gonna dream about me?” 

You squeak and stammer, “I... I... I...” 

He laughs again, “you really are so cute in those pajamas.” 

“Please,” you blurt out, “delete it.” 

“Now, why would I do that?” He challenges. 

“I don’t... know.” 

“I love it,” he insists, “you’re not deleting mine, are you?” 

“N-no, no, I’ll keep it.” 

“Hm, good,” he intones, “it’s all for you so don’t you go showing me off to all your friends.” 

It’s your turn to laugh. “Promise, I won’t.” If only he knew you don’t have any friends to show. 

[melodyglow-blog]

Why i think Dabi / Touya is still alive after chapter 430

#spoilers ahead

Ok first of all,this shit was so ass, i dont even wanna think about how the final chapter looks like it was set in a dark AU ending where nothing changes and rei looks older than ever, still pushing enjis wheelchair for the past 8 years🤮, shoto being a workaholic (and soon being num ONE). Shouldnt he be more focused on his friendships??

Plus, no mention of his siblings that his arc has been working on reconnecting him with. 🤮 So like...Enji won? Shoto will be number one after all wtff..

But id rather think about the fact that touya could still be alive after the timeskip. Here are a few reasons why..

No gravestone shown, no image of a shrine or a burial, hell..no mention of his death AT ALL unlike with toga or shigaraki, erasers friend and midnight...hell, deku even hallucinates shiggy. If touya was truly dead i feel like we wouldve seen a panel of his shrine or ANY indication if his death.

Society and tech have improved so much that quirkless deku can be a hero, so theres no way that touya, with a partial healing ice quirk isnt kept alive.

He was last shown to be 'slowly marching towards death' like BITCH thats literally what being alive is, we are all slowly marching towards death😭

This man is allergic to dying and i do believe that hori left his outcome ambiguous for a reason, if hori wanted to show touya dead he 100% would.

Shoto smiling..like bro would be smiling like that after his oldest brother passed away, like i said, intentionally hori is avoiding any mention of Touya, even natuso is not shown or mentioned, just that shoto has become a workaholic and on his way to being number one...

Plus the panel text is from Deku's pov. So its not todoroki's internal monolouge thats revealed, only his expression and hopefully thats an indicator that his siblings are ok.

Hori has 100% lost the plot lmao, the ending is so convoluted and out of character that theres simply no in universe reason why Touya would be straight up dead. Making shoto mention his father instead of his brothers or sister or MOTHER was certainly a choice🤮🤮🤮.

Old rei pushing enjis wheelchair is sickening and i dont wanna believe that shes still his maid if she has had to mourn touya a second time, its gross and literally a dark au cause wtf.

Since none of shotos siblings were mentioned, this empty space of detail lets us assume that shoto isnt stressing about them. If touya was dead we would see him visiting his shrine, in japanese culture, visiting gravestones and praying to shrines of the dead is symbollic.

I firmly believe that hori either got seriously sick (he said his ears were leaking fluid) or got pressured by his team (he said he cried when his management made him scrap an extra comic page he drew of dabi and sceptic on the past) , i believe that at this point, he didnt have a lot of creative control over his work and wasnt allowed to dedicate more panels to the LOV. HE HAD to prioritise enji and the characters at the top of the poll. When touya came 4th on the final poll, it was too late, his story became enji's story even though hori confessed that he had initially written enji to be killed off in the high end nomu fight.

The story is such a retconned mess, theres no way he wasnt planning shiggy and touya to be SAVED physically, literally touyas last panel is of him crying alone lmaoo.

IN BOTH of Horikoshi's previous serialized series the villains lived and got to reform and atone at the end..

But yeah, my end verdict is that hori intentionally didnt mention touya for the fans to theorise about him living💀

BONUS ~ i saw a post mentioning this, There is also a throwaway panel of the Doctor "curing the uncurable" - which could refer to Touya

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Gloria Swanson (Don't Change Your Husband, Queen Kelly, Sadie Thompson, Sunset Boulevard)—the absolute BALLS this woman had! an icon of the 1920s, her career had simmered down, decent living in radio, deciding you know what? you know what i'll do? I'll star as the haggard old aging decrepit horror icon in Sunset Boulevard, that's what I'll do. Nobody else in Hollywood would take the part (every other actress didn't want to be framed as a has-been)—gloria said, fuck that, I'll eat this role alive and serve cunt the whole time. she was still so gorgeous when they made Sunset Boulevard they had to intentionally make her up/costume her to make her look older than she was. mad respect for the screen legend who says yeah, i am a screen legend, i was always that bitch and here I am again to prove it

Mary Nolan (West of Zanzibar, Desert Nights)—mary nolan had star quality in spades but her career was sadly plagued by tragedy and scandal (though really a lot of what was characterized as "scandal" by the press was more like "men being physically abusive"). she reinvented her career multiple times, first becoming very popular as a ziegfeld girl in the early 1920s under the stage name imogene "bubbles" wilson (said a columnist of the time, "only two people in America would bring every reporter in New York to the docks to see them off. one is the President. the other is Imogene "Bubbles" Wilson.") but after some shit involving a shitty dude got her fired from the follies for negative media attention she went to europe and made films in germany under the name imogene robertson for a few years. in 1927 she accepted the offer of a contract from united artists and returned to the u.s., taking on the stage name mary nolan. she was received favorably in films like west of zanzibar as lon chaney's daughter, and desert nights opposite john gilbert, but she began having difficulty finding work in the early 30s, having at that point acquired a morphine addiction, and she made her final film appearance in 1933, intermittently working in vaudeville and nightclubs. uh well this propaganda ended up super sad but here's a short clip of her in action in a 1930 movie

This is round 2 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman. (remember that our poll era starts in 1910, so please don't use propaganda from before that date.)

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Gloria Swanson:

She was THE idea of a 1920s sex comedy star, and was a hot (and totally unhinged) older woman in Sunset Boulevard. Hot as a young woman and as an older woman? Yes plz

I feel like she would slay in alternative fashion

her performance as Norma Desmond in sunset boulevard makes me insane. I love her

Mary Nolan:

Shockingly modern style of acting! She could pop up today and be a starlette all over again

[ryuichirou]

Replies

A couple of replies, a longer one about fandom.

hadesdancehall asked:

BOKU NO RISOU NO ROI DE POISON DE WA I'M LOSING MY MIND OVER TETTERE!ROOK

YESSSSS YES YES I AM SO HAPPY YOU GET IT LOL Rook and Tettere are the same, the idea of this crossover was driving me crazy, I had to draw it. Look at him go, singing about continuously loving every single person until he finds the one…

Fun fact about this sketch: we have no idea why I drew Alte-Rose!Malleus there. It’s been a while since I drew this sketch, and I completely forgot… I guess she had to deal with this Tettere too, so it kind of fits lol

Anonymous asked:

I know you aren't really type to give information just gorgeous art. But in your last reply post you said you do traditional art and just coloured them digitally.

So I'm wondering... How do you do it!?

Because everytime I try to do that it looks so weird. I can't seem to get the colors as vibrant as I can when I'm only doing digital.

Thank you for praising my art! But Anon, I do give information :c I wrote a reply about this exact topic just a couple of days ago which is filled to the brim with links about everything in my art process + have a guide about exactly this topic.

Your colours might seem off for a number of reasons, it’s hard to tell exactly why by just guessing. It can be related to your software/display or directly to your choice of colours.

Anonymous asked:

Ryu, your dissatisfaction with Twisted Wonderland's age rating is very understandable! The game is allegedly a joseimuke game aimed at adult women, especially in light of the fact that this is a gacha game and that adults—who earn a regular income—will be the true target market. It's a little frightening that adults who play these kinds of games have to be so careful about how we express our affection for the characters lest we be labelled as predators or worse, p*dos. Making adult gamers feel bad for enjoying these "children" who are clearly meant to be adults. They're fictional, and most of them definitely don't look or act like boys their age. Some characters appear so mature; this really struck me as being university attendee coded. It's not like the ensemble is exclusively comprised of children, you know? The game revolves around attractive anime boys who are intentionally created to appear older than they actually are. Unfortunately, despite the fact that i enjoy Twisted Wonderland, it is the first fandom where i experienced Ageism in a fandom.

Trey is, if my memory serves me correctly, one of the most well-liked characters in the Japanese fandom (i remember there used to be a JP poll asking which character in Twist was the most loved). Most likely due to his personality, which again makes sense given that the majority of Twist users are grownups and Trey's portrayal of a character who, despite being a young adult, is quite mature.

Furthermore, even though I realise I'm going to sound like Idia, I detest how the "Normies" entered Nerd/Geek spaces after gaining popularity and then pretended to be uncomfortable with what they saw. You came to OUR space, dude! What did they expect?!

Anon! Sorry for replying late, and thank you! You’ve made so many very good points.

It really is an obvious joseimuke in how the game is written, how the game operates (the gacha system, like you mentioned) + even the type of merch that exists for this game. If you think about it, this is probably the best way to determine the actual target audience of any piece of media: just like Prince of Tennis is technically a classic Shonen Jump series, but all the merch they have is clearly aimed at adult women (purses, perfume, etc).

So yeah, even if that wasn’t the case, calling people predators over shipping themselves with Azul would be a bad thing to do, but in this situation especially it’s absurd to call people out for interacting with TWST pretty much the way it was indented…

What you said about the characters’ age and Trey specifically is so true. To be fair, this could be said about any joseimuke-like title with a big ensemble of boys, Prince of Tennis included. All the characters there are 12-15 years old, but god some of them look over 30.

I think it is important to keep in mind the intended age to a degree (= I dislike how the EN translation tries to dance around mentioning the boys’ age), and Twst does a good job at keeping these boys authentic when it matters, but it doesn’t mean that people won’t ship them with other characters or themselves. And no one questions it and no one finds it weird because it isn’t. It’s not that deep, it has nothing to do with how real teens look or act, this is a fantasy in people’s heads, it’s escapism, it so different and so far removed from the regular boring life it’s insane. It’s so difficult not to sound like Idia, SO I FEEL YOU ANON.  Someone called it the moe factor that some people just don’t get. So I guess it really is about people being normies sometimes lol I wish they would leave already.

[ao3-top-batfam-ships-bracket]

I don’t mean this in any sort of way. I really could care less about what wins what in these polls. I really need to remind you guys that a lot of that information on how important BruDick was to queer history is not exactly true.

The important part of queer history lies just within the fact that people pushed back against Batman and Robin for being gay when they weren’t, it was that intense fear of portraying queer people in media that is important to queer history. That’s why back then you could see art of Batman and Robin on the outside of gay bars, it was more of a “Ay, look how afraid they are of us” and to mock homophobes for being so afraid of gay people that they censored comics that had nothing to do with them.

But in actuality, Bruce and Dick were never made with this intention nor is Dick and Bruce being father and son at all new, it’s been like that longer than any of you that voted on that poll has been alive or into DC comics. Robin along with the Titans were made to be Batman’s and older hero’s younger counterparts and Dick has always been a child while Bruce is a grown man. Dick was always Bruce’s young companion and inevitably was always going to get that “father-son” title. Also, this was the 1900s just being the 1900s; being someone who was much older and praying on young folk to “convert them to homosexuality” was a staple of what gay people did back then, it’s no wonder Batman and Robin got accused of this regardless of their age gap. But yeah, just letting ya’ll know.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts! We don't have enough knowledge about comic history and american queer history to comment on this. For people with more insight on this topic, feel free to treat this as an opening for discussion, we're curious about everyone's thoughts.

[joelswritingmistress]

Last Halloween: Chapter 20

Summary: After a tragedy involving Joel happened on Halloween one year prior, the town now shuns him while ignoring the details of the now closed case. You are seemingly the only one to offer empathy to a man the town is making out to be a monster.

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

You knew it was going to be a challenge, but the plan you had in mind to fight for Joel's integrity and expose the Champagne family was something you had to carry out.

Across from the coffee shop on the quaint little street was the annual Mischief Night Movie Marathon on the town green, drive-in movie style with a giant blow up screen. To discourage kids from throwing eggs and soaping windows the night before Halloween, the town had created an event that seemed to draw in bigger crowds every year. People brought blankets and lawn chairs. Prior to the start of the movie there was a pumpkin carving contest and all of the jack-o-lanterns were lined along a stone wall that bordered the green.

From five to seven o'clock there was a tiny tots hour and the movie Monsters Inc was played for all the young kids. From seven o'clock until eleven, two horror movies played for older crowds that were picked by the townspeople through social media polls in September. The chosen movies for that evening were Trick 'R Treat and Halloween II.

You sent a group text to Jess, Winnie and Chrissy filling them in about what had happened, and they agreed to meet you down in front of the coffee shop.

For the time being you laid low with a beanie hat pulled down over your ears and a hood over that. To your knowledge, Vic and the other assailants had yet to be tracked down; and so you tried your best to go a little incognito.

The carefree nature of the kids' hour across the street made you smile. Moms and dads helped lift giant pumpkins with goofy faces onto the stone wall as kids jumped for joy in their costumes. The gathering was great for the community and you envisioned, just for a second, that one day you might be one of those moms with a little one of your own.

"Hey!" Chrissy was the first to run up to you and made you stumble back with the fierceness of her hug. "Are you okay?"

You knew she'd understand. She had been the only one you hadn't talked to directly about you and Joel.

"Yeah," you half-lied, but you weren't about to say no, "Yeah, I'm okay."

Chrissy pulled back, still holding you by your arms and looked you in the eyes. "I am so sorry I said what I said about Joel that night we all talked. I had no idea.." She shook her head and pulled you back in for a hug. "Is he okay?"

"He's still in the hospital but he's going to be okay," you told her.

"This is so scary." Chrissy still held you firmly in place. "I am so so sorry you had to go through all that."

"It's okay," you assured her.

Your other two roommates joined you by the coffee shop and you all exchanged similar words.

"So, what's the plan?" Jessie asked. "We want to help."

"Thank you, guys." You let out a deep breath. "I'm just waiting on one more crucial piece to the puzzle." You reached into your pocket and removed your phone to check the time.

"What piece?" Winnie asked.

"I had to rely on.. someone else."

They all looked at one another, wondering if anyone knew who or what you were referring to.

"Steve."

"Steve?" Chrissy asked, her eyes bugging. "Like Steve, Steve?"

You nodded. "It was a last resort but he has the in's that nobody else does. And believe it or not, I think he's true to that badge enough to make this happen."

"I thought you said he was a jerk."

"He is.. kind of," you said, "Or maybe that was me just being annoyed by all of his quirks." You shrugged. "We weren't exactly a love match, but I think deep down he's a good person."

I hope, you thought silently, checking the time again.

Monster's Inc. was wrapping up and the line of jack-o-lanterns stretched nearly the entire length of the wall, each with their own faux candle that left a series of orange glows. You needed the video before the start of Trick 'R Treat. Based on the schedule, you knew that left you about twenty minutes.

"What exactly *is* the plan?" Jessie asked.

You took a deep breath, sending a little cloud of smoke into the air. "Steve is getting me the footage from a security camera that shows what really happened last Halloween. It shows the truth, no ifs, ands or buts.. no gossip. Joel was attacked by Johnny when he was attempting to change his flat tire. Johnny choked him out with a chain and in the struggle of Joel fighting for his life, the two of them fell down a little embankment and Johnny broke his neck. The surveillance video shows all of that, and that's why Joel was charged with nothing."

Your three friends stood them staring at you as if they were watching a suspenseful movie unfold.

"There's footage?" Chrissy asked, her mouth hanging open.

"Yes." You nodded. "And tonight, when ninety percent of the town is here, I'm going to show them."

"Holy fuck," Chrissy said. A smile spread across her face. "That's insane."

"How are you going to do that?" Winnie asked.

You glanced over her shoulder toward Steve, who looked nervous as hell, as he wandered toward you, glancing around in all directions.

Relief filtered through your body. He came through. Your plan was going to work - you thought.

The girls followed your gaze and when Steve got wind that you were all staring at him, he puffed his chest a big and pretended to be paying attention to the Halloween gathering across the street.

"Steve." You gave a wave. His hand looked tight and ridged as he waved back. His face matched his posture.

"Hi, Steve." Chrissy gave a small smile and he nodded once at her before staring directly at you.

"They have a computer that's attached to the projection here," Steve informed you. He reached into the pocket of his shirt and pulled out a small, black disc drive. "The department transferred the footage onto multiple drives. This one should work on any computer. It's just an HDMI."

When he placed the disc into your palm you looked at it for a long moment before finally closing your fingertips over the top of it.

You let out a deep breath knowing the magnitude of what was about to happen. "You think you can distract them enough for me to swap this out before they start the next movie?" Your eyes scanned the small team you had standing in front of you.

"We'll do whatever you need," Jessie said with a nod. The girls all nodded and Steve let out a sigh.

"You do know what's on the line for me, right?"

"Yes," you said directly to him. "And I promise you, you won't regret helping an innocent man get the justice he deserves. This town needs to know the truth." You added, "I'll never tell anyone you got me this. No one would believe you would anyway, with our history."

There was a long silence as everyone contemplated what their role could be, before Steve finally said, "I'll distract them at the podium," then added. "And you do what you gotta do."

CLICK HERE FOR CHAPTER 21

@untamedheart81 @amyispxnk @grogusmum @ghostwritesthings @strawbunnyx @ayamenimthiriel @noisynightmarepoetry @jiminstinypinky @tuquoquebrute @pedr0swh0r3 @runningmom94 @mellymbee @shayna-d-clown @bbiophiliaa

[slade-neko]

I'm back! kinda...

I wasn't planning on disappearing for a whole year and a half especially leaving my last post as a poll on Sims of all things. Btw thanks to everyone who answered if anyone's still here. I will make a separate post about it later.

Loss of Interest

At the beginning of 2023 I became incredibly burnt out on playing/ making Sims, had nothing interesting to post, and at some point part of me changed and I began not wanting to post pictures of my sims anymore. I had a major loss of interest in using any social media websites and desired to be more reclusive and private. My older brother makes many sims just as I do and he never posts images of his sims online. Heck he hasn't even used the internet in years and I started to think maybe I should just follow his lead and leave this all behind...

Quit "Social Media"

In recent years I've realized the internet at large is filled with mindless drones, so I decided there was nothing to gain from using social media and it was a pointless distraction/ waste of time that I wanted to cut off completely. Twitter or "X" as its called now is a complete psych ward (not that I even interacted on there to begin with) and I locked down my DeviantART to a private profile (as I think weird fetish freaks were following me... site's name is "DeviantART," after all.)

Couldn't Kill my Tumblr

I began on my valiant quest to end all my social media and purge my accounts, but I couldn't bring myself to delete my tumblr. My first decision was to leave my tumblr and let it fade away into obscurity, but in a way seeing it again made me miss making my stupid rants posts about Sims, games, anime, or whatever. My biggest reason for ever using my tumblr was as an online journal of sorts to remember all the funny and interesting things I've posted over the years all the way back to 2015 when I started it! Skimming through it put a little smile on my face. In 2024 I finally had some revelations and came to the conclusion my depressio had me looking way too deep into things and I needed to simply "be happy" and continue doing what I like.

So, yeah I'll still stick around a little longer and continue to post a few sims pics, thoughts on games, etc like I usually do. However I might not be as active as I was in the past cause being totally honest here, not doing social media, having no connections, essentially being "un-plugged" was oh so very nice haha.

[daycourtofficial]

BREAKING NEWS: Atlas Vanserra Creates Jobs, Fulfils Campaign Promise Ahead of Polls

Prythian: ‘The People’s Prince’ and crowd favourite contender for the 2024 Presidential Elections, Atlas Vanserra (02), the youngest presidential nominee has already begun fulfilling his campaign promise of solving the unemployment crisis. Vanserra, pictured below conferring with his future VP Pumpkin Vanserra (02) between public appearances, has brought a whole slew of previously unemployed or underemployed people into the workforce for their expertise in “baby talk.”A panel of linguists, speech specialists, and parents have been added to virtually every news outlet in town (with the exception of Fox and co, who already had them) and everyone from cat owners to older siblings have been hired as consultants. “I never thought I’d be able to do this,” said a young mother who wishes to remain anonymous, “I got married so young - right after I learned to read and write too - I had no experience or references, no understanding of the job market - and I love being a mother so I’m glad I’m getting paid to do just that.” Many parents of young children, who may have been struggling with the cost of living crisis, income insecurity, rent hikes etc, have found a saviour in Vanserra. “I was a little sceptical at first,” says Tom, a software engineering graduate from Stanford, “I was like, I got the employable degree and still got replaced by AI, what’s a baby gonna do, babble? Turns out, yeah!” Tom has had to move in with his long time girlfriend’s parents to better provide for their infant son as rent prices go up and home ownership remains a pipe dream. “We saved up to get married, we saved up to buy a house. We planned for our baby - we knew it was a big undertaking - but then I lost my job and I was working any minimum wage job I could find so my girl didn’t have to worry about nothing… at one point we considered other options but we had none, and prenatal care is so expensive… it was a nightmare. I’m glad that the public have started caring for mothers and babies postpartum though.”

So how has Vanserra helped? The vested interest in translating the nominee’s speeches has not only employed parents, but secured parents of young children stipends for their cooperation in helping researchers study child behaviour in a non invasive environment. “It’s not just videos or observations,” says a lead scientist with the Babble Initiative, “parents spend all of their time watching children, their wealth of knowledge is priceless. Given how often other animals mimic babies - like cats - we’ve been able to decentralise our input sources. We’re not looking at languages or fiction alone, but trying to ascertain if there are commonalities in these vocalisations. Essentially, if there is a baby language.” Fields like anthropology, archaeology, primatology etc have also received much attention and funding as fascinated patrons realise just how much goes into “understanding what we should but don’t.” “I thought it was just digging,” an anonymous donor remarks “but these guys are tracing language back centuries, connecting history with the present - I was thinking how I used to be a baby once and should understand one, you know? That’s what got me hooked.”

Many wonder if the arts will finally get the respect they deserve as more and more people recognise the important work critics, historians, and especially students do in interpreting, indexing, and interacting with media and information of all kinds. Atlas Vanserra’s manifesto, a 17 page document of artistic impressions, was deciphered by a team of artists - including writers, literary critics, art hostorians etc - after three months of rigorous study. “Several independent readings exist in the mainstream and experts disagree on exactly what each blob means, but that’s part of the work - and I hope it’s at least become clear to all that it is - as a matter of fact - a lot of work!” said a graduate student when asked why Project Demanifest is important today. “Media literacy is dead and intellectualism is dying. I didn’t know what change would look like but it definitely wasn’t an adorable ginger baby, but I’m so glad it’s not another tangerine.”

The People’s Prince has not yet secured the Presidency, and it is unclear at this stage if he will. Though a fan favourite, many have wondered if Atlas is just a fresh new fad the public is obsessed with than a valid contender. “I don’t think it matters,” said an ‘Atlas Truther’ “A democracy is only valid insofar as the people believe the ones in power will act in their best interests. I can’t say that with a good conscience right now, and I’m sure that’s true for a lot of others. When a toddler has a record of fewer tantrums than other contenders - shouldn’t that be a wake up call? People like to call us baby brained anarchists for wanting Atlas to win. I disagree. If a baby can win an election that’s a problem. If the baby has you thinking he should win the election, that’s also a problem. At least Atlas is cute and apathetic to monetary bribes.” Regardless of if we are set to have the youngest president to date, one cannot ignore how easily the youngling was able to affect and enact changes that the last several presidencies have been unable to do - before even coming into power. Atlas has raised the bar, let’s hope this becomes the standard. •

I am 100% invested in this political thriller of a baby becoming president

This ask is why ask boxes were invented

[corwly]

sooooooo i guess i'll say it

to the people who are bitching about ship polls, no one gives a shit. stop being so disrespectful and dramatic about people enjoying things. no one has the right to send death threats based on a fucking poll on a hellsite.

i will admit i'm a younger user. i'm 20 years old and i am gender queer whatever doesn't matter but i am afab and lived most of my life as fem presenting/using she/her pronouns. seeing people say that "oh you hate women cause you voted for the ship with male presenting characters" jesus fucking christ. get a hold of yourselves i am guessing you're older than me but i have never met or interacted with someone who is fandom oriented that is around my age that gives so much of a shit.

if you are not emotionally mature enough to admit that other people enjoy different things from you maybe don't look at the polls??? have you thought of that???

this post is in direct response to this poll

the notes/tags in this are full of homophobia and calling those who voted aziraphale/crowley women haters and all that jazz.

and guess what i couldn't find! good omens fans hating on dr who!!

but what was extremely prevalent?

i'll show you!

like yeah nothing is fucking perfect why do you think amazon prime picked up this show over another company. it makes people happy! the world is changing and you all need to get over it.

and before anyone says shit about me not having seen dr who or being biased, i watched dr who. i didn't like it much and that should be just fine. i get why people don't like good omens and that is also just fine. i honestly didn't like rose as a character much either but that doesn't mean i hate women. i don't usually like women characters written by men for a male audience which, btw, is what dr who does.

it is absolutely possible to exist on the same website without saying you're going to kill the author and writer of whatever fucking media because a different ship won some stupid poll.

i didn't even vote in this! i've never voted on one cause i know how absolutely fucking upset id be about it. i actively try to avoid them but when this came up i was immediately upset and had to start blocking people cause jesus fucking christ let other people be happy and let another fandom enjoy something.

i am not a "new tumblr user" because i like good omens. i have been on and off this shit site for like 8 or 9 years now due to this absolute buffoonery.

just sit the fuck down and stop being stuck in your teenage years when things were more simple. it is 2023 and most people have grown past superwholock cause it's actually not 2013 surprisingly. enjoy things without it being a war of what's better and maybe idk give a new show a chance without thinking it's going to revoke something from you. we are literally all just people trying to enjoy shit and you are making it literally so fucking nasty to even try too.

thanks

[roxylalonde]

"people are SO MAD" yeah and who are the people? why are they mad? does your post about people being mad bring anything to the conversation? does your post about people being mad look like anything other than ridiculing the rightfully angry people out of context? is it necessary for you to comment about how mad people are when this is a situation that is very seriously about widespread racism among white queers and how they do not give a fuck about the lives of black people and all of their morals and solidarity fly out the door the moment a black person criticizes the racist media they enjoy?

you know what, i understand your criticism. and im being honest here not just pandering to you. racism in fandom is something i am becoming a lot more aware of, and honestly its something i never really used to take seriously (if i am being candid) but recently ive been seeing how much it affects people who are just struggling to enjoy something they love while also being black. and as I've grown older I've come to understand why that can be so hard for you guys.

honestly i was just thinking when i posted it like "lmao it's just a tumblr poll why is everyone so mad over homestuck vs. movie" but given the broader context, esp. your last sentence in the ask, it's like yeah i see it was just stirring the pot

i will keep the posts up for the purposes about being candid & giving everyone who stumbles across these posts a chance to read what sparked everything, but i will make them unrebloggable :)

feel free to dm me

[ratguy-nico]

3# The Bleakening

The fandom’s favorite if the polls are anything to go by.

This special have some of my favorite moments, and is the christmas special for excellent, but it just doesn’t resonate as much with me as i would want to. Don’t know why, still love it.

The first episode is okey, Linda being over dramatic about wanting to bring back the christmas spirit with a party is not very interesting for cause I don’t have that much christmas spirit myself.

But then everything takes a turn

WARNING

-The next section has a Bajada de Línea Política-

(couldn’t come with a translation, we said Bajada de Línea in Latam when we talk about how the media deals with political-social information)

Suddenly the episode doesn’t talk about how christmas spirit is getting lost or about a christmas tree thief. Suddenly this becomes a critic about how in holidays the LGBTQ+ community is systematically erase from the picture cause Christmas, as many other holidays, is mean to celebrate the traditional cis-heteronormative family, something that of course is not a thing our community can aim for.

Is not only a social thing, where queer youth (and even older queer people as we see in the episode) have to suffer trough the rejection of their relatives, their own family telling them to not make things uncomfortable or weird. Is bigger than that with all the media around us telling this is a moment to spend with your white family made by a mom, a dad, and childrens, commercials, marketing campaigns, and different conglomerates whose main target is not us.

And yeah I know this had change a little bit since the past 10 years which is not much actually, for context this season was made back then in 2015-2017.

Of course now companies now days acknowledge our existence but just if it suits them for re-newing their brand and trying to appear more politically correct (I hate how some people use this concept)

But in that time and even now, if my experience is anything to go by, we are left out of the celebrations. Is not that we don’t have christmas spirit is just that we don’t fit in the christmas spirit itself, the christmas is not for us. But even if they try to shut us down, we remain, cause we want to celebrate, we have the right to share our love in our own way, with our own family, a chosen one.

The song Twinkle Lights, even if is not one of my favorites, carries this brutal message. A message that thank to the gods is in all Bob’s Burgers series but come to be the start in this kind of episodes.

This is my way of seeing this episode, this could be incorrect, and be fed by my own relationship with the holidays. No soy gringo, soy Latinoamericano, so I don’t know if you would have another perspective. I’m intense and I now. I read to much between the lines.

So for a more cheering comments.

EXTRAS

The kids had one of the best songs in the episode, The Bleaker, and their part is very cute. there’s also a brutal scene at the end of the first episode that I would post later.

The kids are good but for me Linda and Bob carried the episodes, specially Linda, but I live for they exploring Bob’s sexuality, you know it, is just my favorite thing in the serie.

You can not look at this man and tell me hasn’t have his share of underground gay bars.

"I would never call the cops" HE KNOWS! On an underground gay rave you DONT.CALL.THE.COPS.

I love to see Dalton and Marshmallow come back and Marshmallow’s new boyfriend Art the Artist appearance (I really like this lil man I hope he reappears at some point) (I know is been 7 seasons already, leave me alone)

By the way I’m very normal about Bob in his Bleaker costume. Aha. Not drooling at all. Oh and definitely not fantasizing about Teddy and Bob fucking in this costumes. Of course not. Normal.

Teddy using the situation as an excuse to make a semi naked Bob cuddle with him in a inflatable santa? Mhh. Aha. Normal.

[two-of-them-tournament]

Prelim FAQs, or: Please For The Love of God I Can See You All Complaining In The Tags

I was planning on ignoring people's complaints but it's kind of grating seeing the same comments everywhere, especially when it's something I've already addressed, so:

"Where's x?"/"This is y erasure."

Contenders were almost entirely assembled from submissions, which were open for a whole week. If you missed the submission period, I'm sorry, but it's the nature of these things that more people are seeing the polls than were able to nominate duos. I've also seen this comment for duos that are in other, more specific prelims, and duos that were popular enough to advance straight to the main bracket. Have a look around before complaining. Or, preferably, don't complain about this at all since there's nothing to be done about it at this stage.

"Why don't all of them have images?"

I have a job and hobbies and a social life and I'm not going to track down pictures of 232 duos, most of whom I know nothing about, and then assemble them into nice little images when we're not even at the main bracket yet. There are 35 prelim categories, and a few of those had to be split into multiple parts because you can't have more than 10 options in a poll. For my sanity, and to keep things moving along without further delays, prelims with 5+ competitors didn't get images. There are some smaller prelims that also didn't get images, mostly because it's hard to find pictures of literary & podcast characters without resorting to fanart, and using book covers/podcast logos would be uninteresting, thus defeating the purpose of the image. All main bracket rounds will have images.

Huge thanks to my girlfriend for sourcing most of the pictures I've used in this, and also generally having a greater breadth of media knowledge than myself.

"Putting x in a poll with y isn't fair."

The purpose of these preliminary rounds is to weed out weaker competitors, making for a more interesting tournament. More popular characters getting more votes means it's working as intended. I'm a fan of a lot of relatively obscure media, so I know it's disappointing seeing your faves get curb-stomped, but I'm not intentionally sabotaging anyone, and I've been surprised by some of the results myself. For example, I'd literally never heard of the Malevolent podcast before receiving submissions for it, while I've listened to both Wooden Overcoats and Kane & Feels. I expected the Funns to win the podcast prelim, but it seems the Malevolent guys are going to win it. Am I disappointed? Yeah, a bit. But it's also the reason I decided to run prelims instead of simply choosing my faves from submissions.

Regarding the Due South prelim and the Ray Wars

While I understand the defensiveness of older fandoms that have gone through every argument a thousand times, I genuinely couldn't care less about fandom wank. I thought it'd be fun to have these guys in the tournament because they're a couple of classic duos who aren't very well-known on tumblr nowadays, and because I recently introduced the show to my girlfriend so we'd both like to see it represented. I don't expect them to do well in the main bracket, but that's not the point; it's for fun. That said, I can't put both Rays in the main bracket due to space constraints, and I'm not going to arbitrarily choose one because I like them both, so they got their own prelim by necessity. If I did put them both in, they'd probably end up facing each other anyway, leading to the same comments.

[anatthema-art]

# my perspective has even changed since i made that post #bc that was before the reigan sans poll #which kinda changed tsm culture a bit. Kinda Funny How An Event Meant To Analyze Or Celebrate A Culture Ended Up Being A Relevant Milestone To TSM Studies And To How The TSM Culture Itself Is Seen And Understood By The Masses. (why am i talking about this so seriously?)

yeah no genuinely i’m utterly fascinated by it? like..?? when i first saw it happening it was like haha oh this is funny and then even when the wild shit with the finals of the poll went down and all the memes were made i still was just enjoying the ride. but like??? in retrospect it kinda feels like that poll REDEFINED sexyman culture in a way?

like i think when spamton became everyone’s next obsession kinda STARTED the reframing in the public eyes but the poll really cemented it. i think ever since the poll, tumblr sexyman has become like… a lot more CELEBRATED? i remember back when TSMs were starting to be discussed by more widespread sources (the izzzyzzz video essay comes to mind, lots of video essays popularized the phrase in a less niche circle) they were very critiqued in the whole “fandom latches onto any character who is a twinky white man and if theyre not human they’re turned into one” and i think that definitely IS still a criticism of the culture but i think since the poll and an overall shift in tumblr culture as a whole they’ve very mucu been almost heralded as mascots for tumblr as a whole.

there’s so many factors here i can think of beyond the poll and spamton too honestly: stuff like blorbo becoming a loved and accepted term, tumblr as a whole flourishing as a website as every other social media crumbles around it, and the resurgence of some older fandom culture

i think it’s super interesting because the term almost feels less rigid now, like some of the arguments i made for TSMs versus disney channel eldritch horrors i don’t think apply anymore because i very specifically looked at the way fans interpret the perceived personalities and “humanity” of the characters, which is certainly a lens to look at them with, but i think it’s almost more loose and less defined now. the post i reblogged a lil bit ago about how the character has to be Weird and Unconventionally Attractive is definitely a good start but i think it even goes beyond attraction? i’m not sure if there’s that much of a typically defined common thread between these characters at all. i think a sexyman is whatever the general fandom culture makes of it

so uh. anon Do Not Worry about taking this seriously lol i was gonna respond in a quick manner and then i had more thoughts than i thought i did and now you’ve got another essay on your hands i guess idk man uhhh tumblr is a webbed site fan culture is fun yayyy

[dumbestthingiveeverheard]

Dumbest Thing I've Ever Heard: 8/14/2023

Fifth Place: Dean Phillips

Another day, another Democrat trying to push for somebody--anybody--to come out and primary President Biden for reasons that never make any fucking sense. Of course, Phillips is a "moderate Democrat" (read: Republican) who clearly wants Biden out of the way because of how progressive the President is--and honestly, I think Biden should welcome the hatred of people like this. I also cannot believe we live in a world where Joe Biden of all people is too progressive for some Democrats, but here we are.

Mind you, Biden is much more well liked not just among the insiders of the Democratic Party but also among the rank and file members who actually would vote in a primary. Meaning any chance of a primary against him is unlikely to be successful, but the fact that these idiots keep trying to run to Biden's right while assuming that's what the Democratic voter base wants (a large chunk of Democrats are too the left of Biden) is just sad. And that's not even getting into how Biden is seen as some sign of the status quo by these people--while they constantly want alternatives who are too his right and would more than likely continue the status quo, albeit with a younger face.

Of course, this fear about Biden being old is a totally manufactured concern by the political class. The average voter doesn't care how old a politician is--in fact, back in 2016 and 2020 the youngest voters went for Bernie Sanders, who is even older than Biden. This is all just bullshit designed to scare Biden into not running for re-election, and I am very happy he has not fallen for it.

Fourth Place: Kurt Schlichter

Speaking of primary challengers that have no chance of going anywhere, Ron DeSantis is still running for President--and Kurt over at Townhall firmly believes he'll be the nomination. You see, according to Kurt, the real reason why DeSantis isn't leading in the polls is because nobody has heard of him yet:

Remember, this is a primary race, not a Twitter popularity race. The simple fact is that the polls in July 2023 do not reflect the real situation on the ground in 2023, much less 2024 when the actual voting happens. You know who are active right now? The activists. And those aren’t polls of activists. Those are polls of regular people living regular lives who think “Yeah, I like Trump and Trump’s getting a raw deal from the scumbag prosecutors, and he’s the only guy I really know about, so I’m going to put his name down.” They haven’t had to think hard about it yet. They haven’t had to weigh the facts. They haven’t really looked at Ron DeSantis’s record – if they’re looking at Twitter, they’re going to think that he parties with Paul Ryan over at George Soros’s crash pad. That kind of dumb lie is easy to dispel, and when people see that they’ve been lied to, they’re going to look deeper to find the truth. 

You mean four years of the media shoving him down our throats hasn't been enough time for the average person to know his record? And none of this is even getting into the stupidity of assuming that people who are political enough to vote in the Republican primary also haven't taken the time to know who DeSantis is.

Mind you, more exposure to DeSantis does not seem to be helping him--if anything, the opposite seems to be the case. Remember two years ago when DeSantis was seen as the 2024 frontrunner? Some were even predicting that he'd replace Donald Trump as head of the Republican Party by the midterm elections--and that never happened. That is because people saw exactly who Ron DeSantis was, and they didn't like it.

Third Place: Ron DeSantis

A short follow up on my last entry, it seems like Ron has trouble keeping the attention of the people who already know of him. Here's some reporting from Mediaite:

Donald Trump literally overshadowed Ron DeSantis — with planes – at the Iowa State Fair on Saturday, flying over the event and prompting the throngs of GOP voters to chant “we want Trump!” while the Florida governor was flipping burgers and trying to woo support.

This man seriously thinks people want him to be President.

Second Place: Karl Lake

The former Arizona candidate for Governor challenged somebody to "milk a bull" in order to prove that there are only two genders. Of course, given people aren't steer--and people assigned male at birth can produce milk if they have enough estrogen in their system, by the way--this comparison was seen as really dumb, because it is.

Winner: Merrick Garland

I talked Friday about Merrick's choice to create a special council to investigate Hunter Biden, which was little more than an attempt to appease Republicans--and said attempt has failed as many Republicans, including ones who asked for the exact special prosecutor Garland picked, are still upset with him.

So Garland has lost all Biden supporters and Biden critics--this is the most Merrick Garland move of all time.

Merrick Garland, you've done the dumbest thing I've ever heard.

[batarangsoundsdumb]

hae interrogationes multae respondeant quia demens .

if you read this entire ask post you deserve a gold star and financial recompensation

Um, Obviously because when you’re adopted by a white guy you automatically become white duhhh

this is about this post lmao and yeah youre absolutely right, you have to hand your poc card in when you get adopted by a white guy.

Do you think Cass would listen to Yanni, the YouTube channel epic symphonic rock, or some other stuff? There's some cool mashups but idk if that's up your alley, I kinda feel like I'm pushing it with my weird taste of music by recommending an orchestra cover of metal, but i just love that sort of thing and mashups :P @harvestyourcherries 

i haven’t heard of that? but in my personal (correct) opinion steph listens to classical music, and then both modern and older, and then also stuff like black sabbath, iron maiden, but also hardrock and hardcore. i like the idea of cass just liking the most extreme screaming songs full of noise and then also listen to pachelbel’s 370th sonata yanno? THANK YOU for the rec tho

speaking of ur cass playlist hc...reminds of the time (yesterday) i found 2 playlists randomly on spotify from the same user. one was abt 3 hours of instrumental/classical "dark" & "nostalgic" music. the other almost 11 hours of nothing but hardcore bass/synth/electronic music. just an incredible tightrope act to put on in public. the synth one was also called like "psalms for synth sluts" which is Also incredible

tbh i LOVE synth SO MUCH like for no reason at all but then also cannot handle a poppy electronic beat lmao. but this seems like the kinda thing i’d do but just in one (1) playlist bc i just sort songs by vibe instead of genre? that’s how i end up with britney spears and billy ray cyrus in the same playlist. 

Oh, I want Kate Kane playlist next! It would be amazing if you could do one when you have time and will 🙏

how rude would it be of me to just say no? like sorry kate but idk you and also you seem way too keen on the us military for an institution that homophobically targeted you? (and also commits war crimes) but let’s unpack the fact that the institution that caused the death of your mom and sister and also got you blacklisted for being gay is still one you align with???

'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' --- when i tell you i fucking screamed LOL!!!!!!! i can imagine the cameraman not knowing if he should cut to commercial or keep it on these two weirdos fighting on stage (bruce definitely ruffled dick's hair/noogied him right?? 

about this post but yeah lmao. this cameraman just turns to like the audience to get a reaction and it’s just multiple moments of CLEAR shock.

you are the only funny person on this hellsite

how egotistical is it for me to say that i get this ask multiple times a month? bc it literally happens so often it’s hilarious to me.

Wish there was more john/Bruce content 😔😔😔 was so hungry I actually looked at canon media 😔😔😔 (Justice League Dark babeeeyyyyyy)

check out batman: damned for some mediocre content but at least it’s john/bruce (also very interesting story and stuff, just got very >:( over this weird part where harley quinn tried to r*pe bruce or something? it’s not for everyone)

dick grayson but he's nicki minaj

his anaconda don’t want none,,, unless...... 

Dick Grayson was never a cop, he played Marshall on Paw Patrol

you are SO right. also paw patrol is a fucking good show idc. that shit could’ve been the new steven universe on this hellsite.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CS1lI0bLI7-/?utm_medium=copy_link

...

why do people keep reposting my CONTENT. if you are not funny yourself don’t just grab shit off of tumblr and post it on insta,,, get a life. sidenote: should i start an insta and get all these ppl to take my content down that would be funny as hell.

Might I suggest for a Gotham City Meme: something about the true crime fandom thirsting for the rogues gallery

ok can i just say something slightly controversial?? no? i don’t find true crime ppl who are into criminals funny, that shits disturbing irl im not gonna bring that into my very chill universe.

i may have never seen a 'jason cleaning guns in sink' fic but i do know he WOULD

THANK YOU

bestie im sorry to say this to you but while you can, and people do wash their guns in the sink, that is a lot of lead in a very vital part of the kitchen.

people tend to do it in the bathtub.

WHY???? like damn why do you even have guns

i dont think i read many gun sink fics exactly but i have read lots of fics where jason cleanes his guns in the living room. usualy dissembles them and cleans them with a rag i think

lmao fair enough, like i think that’s a large part of what i remember as well.

if you say you've seen/read gun sink fics I believe you. I think those of us who didn't see them are lucky or maybe didn't search for fics by tags or something idk

i mean ive never sought them out but i HAVE seen them,, like definitely i know almost for certain.

saw your tags and I'm interested in Steph/Kara now. They would be the most chaotic couple <3

literally thoooo, i have a wip where they get together in a zombie apocalypse and like UGGGHhhh i am so in love with them.

I am the Breece anon. Thanks for the recommendation; am reading now. I’ve always been a hardcore Superman fan because I love my pure himbo farm boy. My logic is, if one Bruce is a Broose, then multiple Broose are a herd of Breece. And this is a hill upon which I will perish.

fair enough,,,, like moose, meese, goose, geese, bruce, breece. i get your logic and i stand by it as well. (glad you enjoyed the comic recs!!!!)

It's a beautiful day in Gotham, and you are a group of horrible Breece

OH my god dude lmao

there only being 42 fics on ao3 for tim and bernard is honestly so sad i need more

it’s like twice that now!!! we did it lads. (tho very sad that my fic isnt number one but like number 4 :((((  )

i'm too late you already did the poll lol but may i suggest bethy (bernard + timothy)

shit dude that wouldve been so fucking funnyyyyy. think ppl have just stuck to timber tho, tim/bernard kinda died down recently and i think it’s too bad, they’re a great couple and i love them.

Wait, hear me out

Bernothy @redlightofdawn

great recommendation (lmao this ask is from like a month ago) but very sorry to announce that NARDTH is the superior shipname

Wait, we know that bernard likes milfs (Tim's step-mom) but what about dilfs? gilfs?

Wait no, I regret sending that ask

these were two seperate asks and they’re HILARIOUS. in my personal opinion tho,,, milfs, gilfs, dilfs are just about vibes and bernard is just attracted to sexy ppl who may sometimes be milfs, dilfs, or EVEN gilfs.

crime in bludhaven would drop to half if nightwing had a boob window. in this essay i will-

WHERE’S THE ESSAY ANON, WHERE’S THE FUCKING ESSAY

Wait if Barbra and Tim r at opposite ends at all times what happened to Barbra once everyone’s Tim’s ever love before started dying lol

she won a lottery ticket and spent 2 weeks on a resort in the bahamas before returning home and finding out that the joker was arrested for tax evasion and then spent a month staying at her big tiddie goth girlfriend’s house before conner came back to life and she broke her pinkie playing table hockey.

Why is the opposite end thing so funny and compelling to me. Tim comes back from his depression quest for Bruce and Babs is now a literal god

lmao when tim loses his spleen barbara reaches nirvana.

Are you still taking music recs because I have three songs that remind me of Jason that I think you'd like

send to me or lose a toe

🌸 ⭐ put this star into the inbox of your favorite blogs. it’s time to spread positivity! ⭐🌸😋

thanks, i wont tho on account of i wont.

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMduBy3Sr/

⬆️

This is the whole of Blüdhaven and everyone anywhere.

Nightwings ass alone saves more people in a calendar year and does more for so society than most heroes do their whole career.Also u are one of the funniest tumblr pages out there. The vibes are unmatched and the memes and tags ✨send me✨.Thank u and goodnight @julia-flow 

fanksss also lmao.

That's going to be a little bit difficult to explain, but

There's some music that you listen to and you think, "oh my gosh, I can perfectly imagine Dick Grayson singing this song, with the same voice as the singer because that voice matches with Dick Grayson"?

oh yeah totally lmao. i have a lot of songs that i think are just entirely dick grayson yanno? kind of all of my playlists have that vibe, but i really find bleachers to fit with dick? idk.

"Lois lane/Superman" fics this, "Lois lane/Clark Kent" fics that, (/lh) let's get into the real good stuff. Some people ship Lois, Clark, and Superman as a throuple. Most popular fic tag for sure

yes totally, i think they’d be absolutely killer on ao3 and clark gets so fucking embarassed about it.

I miss your post, hope you’re doing okay!!

haha this was like 2 months ago, but i was doing fine then too! just didn’t have a lot of inspiration in terms of content.

Doot doot!

noot noot

I’m confused. What did DC do now? Like with nightwing? And another sibling? Please spoil everything for me

lmao they gave him a secret sister plotline where they had his dad cheat on his mom with tony zucco’s wife, bc dick’s life wasn’t traumatic enough yet.

sorry but it's so funny that batman is called "the dark knight" when the gotham city baseball team is called the gotham knights. it'd be like if a vigilante was running around new york called like "the scary yankee"

lmaooo no. but like yankee comes from dutch names or something so wouldnt it be HILARIOUS if gotham knights came from like german names and bruce would be running around called the dark KLAUS UND NIEK @graysonnightwing 

(not a batcest shipper) it’s so funny to me that the responses are “i’m a batcest shipper because i can differentiate fiction from reality and and it doesn’t bother me personally, but i understand why you oils think it’s weird” to “i wish all batcest shippers a very fucking die”

yeah lmaoo. i personally basically flipped my entire stance around to ‘i dont care please leave me and everybody else alone’ bc i think there’s really no point in starting a moral dillema over some fucking fandom bullshit. Please just,,, go home,,, log off, find a nice forest to have a little walk in and remember that somewhere in history, somebody probably died in the place you’re standing. and you will also die someday, and somebody will have to look at your internet usage and see you fighting multiple people anonymously while being named ‘nightwingsbuttchin200186′ like... calm down, we’re all gonna die this is not the thing to worry about.

so since like "wards" don't really exist in modern society almost all the batkids are foster kids, right? i used to work in the system and imagine: monthly visits from social workers and guardian ad litems, bruce having to get permission to take the boys anywhere out of state, calling their social worker at like 8 a.m. like "yeah dick broke his arm again... a gymnastics accident this time...." their poor social worker. bruce send her a huge bouquet and box of chocolates every month to stay on her good side

i imagine the social worker just getting into the case like ‘yeah let’s get this kid a good guardian’ and then ending up having to work with 22 y/o bruce wayne and his 50 y/o dad. and so this social worker is like ‘okay we can work with this, this is the best home i can find’ and then like it ends up landing on its feet and then the kid gets adopted and then they get a call a year later like ‘uhm so hi, this kid tried to steal my tyres can i adopt him?’ and like 3 years later. ‘okay so basically, my neighbours’ kid imprinted on me and now they’re dead, can i keep him?’ two years later it’s like ‘okay so this assassin child-’

ever since I saw that one post of yours, the meme that's something like "I know that abba's backup dancer got me" with a picture of discowing, I've been haunted. Every once in a while I'll be minding my own business then the image of abba's backup dancer dick grayson aka nightwing aka discowing will flash in my mind and I'll be frozen in place. Today at work I was in the middle of folding clothes and suddenly once again discowing entered my mind and I suddenly lost the ability to see anything except He. Thank you.

wow. the IMPACT.

Braver than any US marine man props to you🤝

this shit is about the time i wrote an article on batcest, like man,,, the fact that i didn’t get cancelled is MIRACULOUS. also like,,, uh if anybody on here did gossip on me,, send screenshots i’d love to see it.

Hello, just wanted to say your article was great. Thank you for taking the time to provide an unbaised answer. It should provide people with nuances they couldn't possibly conjure on their own.

May I ask where your username originates from?

yes you may (also thanks!!!) i thought it up when i was trying to find an original username bc i didnt want to be called like ‘timdrakes something something’ or ‘jason todd something smoething’ or ‘dick grayson something something’ yanno? so i thought batarangs, they sound so dumb and that’s my username story... now it’s my whole entire brand lmao.

yno that bit in kick ass where red mist asks kick ass if he wants a hit of his blunt, was that the inspo for stoner tim

no? it’s bc i think stoners are hilarious and drugs are great. (dont do drugs tho) 

How would u feel if someone actually wore one of those bruce or ollie pride shirts u edited

fenomenal next question.

Dick as lil huddy and Jason as James gave me radiation poisoning and now I’m screaming crying throwing up so thx for that

(Rico suave as Tim is perfect tho literally no changes needed)

i was so funny for that shit wasn’t i??? lmao i loved those weird ass fancasts

You're doing the Lord's work by providing us with all these Gotham/Metropolis citizens memes, thank you for being so relentlessly funny @nellethiel-aranel

you’re welcome!! i really enjoy making memes, but getting validation for my content and my memes is REALLY nice.

Bruce is such a slut in your memes and honestly i love that for him @rhodey-rhudert-rhodes-main 

he’s that much of a slut irl too dw.

Bruce and Alfred have an emergency pride flag for the batkids. Oliver Queen printed an emergency "I love my gay son" t-shirt and as soon as Roy told him he was dating Jason, Oliver started wearing that shirt everyday and Roy always cringes when he sees it. Oliver also has an emergency "I love my lesbian daughter" shirt just in case for Cissie.

lmao YES i had a post like this bc like all of their kids/family members are so gayy

stop bringing back batfam fancasts it is not real it is not real it is not- 😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀

oh yes it is my darling.

did discowing burn down the notredam because he hates the bees? @allulily

no he did it bc fuck the french.

im gonna beg for 1 thing and 1 thing only. please please please put physical by olivia newton john on dick's playlist

okay then beg. bc i wont. physical reminds me too much of glee and that hurts me mentally.

your playlist is sorely missing some Madonna. Specifically Into the Groove, Like a Prayer, and Vogue

i’m scared of madonna that’s why she’s not on there. she haunts me in my dreams.

suggestion: son of batman by aaron dews for dick’s playlist🤩

sorry, i listened to it and the vibe didn’t agree with me.

Hear me out, metropolis citizens sending rare pair fics of Clark Kent x Superman fics to Lois to edit

yes, absolutely hilarious. even more funny if they send like physical copies, no address attached and lois sends it back marked with red ink, SOMEHOW

Imagine all the smut Clark must of read editing the fics

clark reads smut confirmeeed

NOT LOIS READING SUPERBAT PORN AND EDITING IT A 2AM 

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

hc that alfred is a meta that boosts healing factor of the people around him. if the bats are injured as much as they seem to be they would be doing bat stuff MAYBE half the year. no one including alfred knows about this. whenever the kids move out they inexplicably dont recover from injuries as fast and feel better whenever they visit the manor they just chalk it up to homesickness. bruce just thinks he heals really fast. alfred thinks everyone doesnt take care of themselves properly @finchcollector

that’s actually such a great idea, but i think that alfred would find out and learn how to concentrate it better so he can help more people, bc he’s great and i love him.

One of your dickfast posts reminded me of that tweet that goes: 'so you've had sex how many times? Yeah technically that's not a bromance' lol that's dickwally or dickroy

literally tho. like that’s all of dick’s friendships. once it gets past a certain time dick is like ‘wow i wonder what it would be like to make out with wally, wally come make out with me’ and wally’s like ‘we’ve done this like 40 times, dick, you know what it’s like’ and dick is like ‘sorry are you complaining?’ and they just make out.

superfam and batfam associations??

-batman and superman

-dick/barabara and supergirl?

-conner and tim

-jon and damian

pls enlighten me I am confused

nope,,, uhm batman and superman, but dick and superman as well, and then conner and tim, jon and damian and steph + babs with supergirl

I came across a fic in which Wonder Woman calls Batman "Stella" (like Stellaluna, the children's book) and I can imagine the batkids hop on the trend and maybe copies of the book appear at random places (aka, everywhere Bruce frequents)

sorry can’t reciprocate that was the name of my high school chemistry teacher and it gives me nightmares to think about.

good human what are your pronouns?

wouldn’t you like to know?

I need me some gothamites preferring harley over joker memes

everyone prefers harley over joker youre just very fucked up if you dont

don't understand why people try to add like veteran policy to the batfamily

dick pulling out his veteran batfam member card so he can eat first: step aside, peasants

Do you know the song Simmer by Haley Williams? It (the first verse anyways) reminds me of Jason? It's about rage.

damn yeah i LOVE HAYLEY!!!! youre right thoo

Okay so I like listen to your stoner Tim Drake playlist 24/7 but would he listen to skegss? Also I keep adding songs mentally it’s killing me 😩✋🏼 Anyways,, I literally love and worship your playlist 😃🤞🏼 And uh yeah have a good day ✨

stoner tim drake playlist is lyfeeee. also dont know who skeggs is? i’m stupid? have a good day!!

All the Robins (and Batgirl) decide to trade costumes for one night just to fuck with Batman and all the villains in Gotham. @subspacecadet 

batman knows it’s them youknow but like,,, what does he call them? he’s like ‘red hood?’ and 3 people answer and he’s not about to compromise some identities so he’s just Pissed.

I aspire to treat cops the way my dad treats them. This man is a 45 year old Asian immigrant to the US and the treats them like his pets. He talks about them like unruly children. Sometimes he pays off local cops to shut up and stop acting racist. And usually it works. I don’t know why but I can see Oliver Queen doing this

vibes... and also yes? oliver queen handing a local cop a donut to shut the fuck up lmao. but yanno i commit enough crimes to not really want to ever see a cop ever, so they kinda scare the everloving fuck out of me.

seeing as tim hasn't aged in years, that means he was 17 at peak emo tumblr era. im back on my emo tim bullshit and im not letting it go

emo tim had a wattpad account send tweet

People seem to think that batman is so dark and serious when the rainbow batsuit is right there. He wore it with no shame.

dude the 60s were a DIFFERENT TIME

dick grew up in a circus, jason grew up on the streets, and tim was probably raised by the internet

all of them cuss every other word and you cannot tell me otherwise

bitch i KNOW but dc has to change to an 18+ rating if they want to sell comix with swear words in them so we gotta deal with imagining the swear words in ourselves

thoughts on teen titans and young justice

haven’t seen teen titans on account of havent seen it and young justice was LITERALLY my favourite thing ever, tho i do gotta admit it’s not at all similar to the young justice comics unfortunately. i really wouldve liked to see timmy bart kon cassie and cissie animated on tv!!

ew ew ew how to delete batcest shippers I genuinely digust them

log off tumblr?

Okay as poc who was called racist for calling an Italian pastabrain: in the batfam are Italians bit Damian just yells various insults about the others being Italian. Just him yelling “What are you doing you moronic spaghettihead!” At steph etc

huh? i meant real italians. homeboy is telling steph he hopes she chokes on her fucking garlic.

I think it's dumb as hell to pull the batman is the best fighter in the batfam argument because like it's just irresponsible of Bruce to let his kids fight when they couldn't possibly be on his league or something

fair enough, but also like who cares they could all kill you just sit down and take a beating.

lady shiva, thalia al ghul and Selina Kyle are all milfs @notanothertimburtonenthusiastugh 

unfortunately, i have to admit,,, you’re right

why tf didn't someone give joker a death sentence already? like he's a mass murderer...give him the electric chair treatment wtf

idk i think plenty of people would have tried to murder him already (boring answer is: he is a popular character so they can’t kill him off bc he brings in lots of money)

There’s no such thing as “ copaganda”.

all american media is propaganda. happy to clear this up for you

is it bad that I find lady shiva owa owa

no. find her as owa owa as you want.

aight I'm guessing the order of your favs in batfam:

1. tim

2. Steph

3. dick

4. Duke

5. the rest

you’re wrong but it’s cute that you tried, i generally don’t have favourites, but i have a special place in my heart for steph, tim, dick and cass. bc they were like my introduction to batfam. but damian, jason, duke, bruce, babs and alfred are NOT FORGOTTEN OR UNLOVED

oh my god i was literally just readily willing to believe that italians werent white ty for clarifying it was a joke im so dumb sdkvjskdfs

i mean some italians aren’t white? italian is a nationality as well as an ethnicity, so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

since I saw so many people doing headcanons about the nationalities of batboys, I see Dick as an Italian.

dont know if youre serious or not, but sure.

super random but

jason 🤝 damian

old english

lmao fair enough.

tim absolutely has 1 gay uncle and his parents shit talk said uncle all the time so after bruce adopts him he specifically reaches out to this uncle to be like "heyyyy just so you know you majorly influenced my life yes i know i havent seen you since i was 5 and at the family reunion yes i know you dont remember my name idc thank you im gay too" and then they never talk again.

yuppp lmao that’s definitely something that could happen. i can also consider tim having no family members, like none. until he does like a dna test and he realises he has like an aunt living barely 2 miles away from him who’s like some illegitimate child of his grandpa.

I dare you one of them sends clark superman/clark fic and clark corrects the shit out of it and then goes like ps his dick is not that big, just telling as someone who has seen it. internet either explodes or goes who tf did he not fuck at this point.

i think everybody would call clark a buzzkill and try to cancel him over that.

so you're telling me Tim Drake wouldn't buy Starbucks?

no. dunkin donuts all the way

One of my favorite things is imagining people finding out jason came back from the dead and being like "oh no does he have magic powers now?!?!?" and he just pulls out a gun and tries to shoot joker

now he doesn’t even have the gun :) lmao

my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context

bruce gets codename ‘ugh’ everytime. he hates it.

crazy that tim being a 17 y/o ceo and a stoner who does brand deals are all actual canon things written in detective comics comics and not made up for shits and giggles by you, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb @rowdeyclown

SO CRAZY HUH?

batman au where everything is the same but his utility belt is bright pink

absolutely, but i raise you, his boots light up like sketchers when he kicks people.

unbeknownst to the superhero fandom writers in the dcuniverse, clark and BRUCE are one of the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag on ao3. clark writes the best lois x superman angst, full of unhappy endings and scenes that are a so detailed you'd think you were in the middle of a superhero beatdown. bruce made an ao3 account to fuel "the do the butts match" thing, and makes batman/bruce fics from time to time. he wrote a superbat fic as a joke but ended up making it REAL porny. @concrastinator

dude they’re WAY too busy for that. Oliver Queen and Hal Jordan on the other hand are the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag writing what is Mostly porn.

When the dining table topic gets to politics, Steph says "eat the rich" as the solution

bruce just silently takes away her fork and knife while she’s talking.