#and obviously i agree to a certain level

[riverspond]

i literally have no idea how to word this, but do people think each regen love even the companions they didn’t personally meet? like do you think twelve loves rose, or thirteen loves clara, etc?

[thatbanjobusiness]

Many people love the epic washes of sound (my mind unfairly stereotypes this as ‘fantasy-oriented soundtracks’) or highly-digitalized stylization of newer genres. These come with high levels of studio production, an enormous audial manufacturing in which all flaws or points of vulnerability are washed away. Nearly every mainstream vocalist's voices have been pitch corrected. They’ve had many separate recorded takes blended together for the ultimate, flawless sound. The musical instruments are so clean they don’t sound like they’re coming from human hands (and sometimes they’re not).

For me, you just deleted everything that made the music sound human, created an artificial artifact that is so "perfect" it's boring. If I don't hear the actual human's performance of the music, down to the effort and the flaws, then I can't relate to it. I want the musical instruments to sound like something that is being played, not something that has been manufactured for my consumption. I want the singing to be someone's voice, someone with real, hard-earned talent and strong convictions, not someone whose flawlessness only exists from computer interference.

Until recently, with second-half-of-the-Twentieth Century methods of manipulating studio recordings, human music sounded rawer. I crave that authenticity.

Music isn’t a product for me to vibe to passively, thoughtlessly in the background. Music is an innately human cultural action. It’s participatory. I want to feel it in my bones, make me feel like I’m participating in the generations and generations of heartfelt expression our species has passed down. I want to hear the cries of my ancestors 200 years ago. I want to feel like I’m part of something bigger. Something alive. Something grown from the heart. Something that fills myself and, at times, is fuller than myself.

The music that’s been produced to death in the studio? It’s as unappealing and unrealistic to me as blatant Photoshops of women’s poreless, wrinkle-less, magically glowing bodies.

[thisgodwontforgiveyou]

re4 really captures a unique cinematic atmosphere in the sense that it feels barely finished in a way only movies really do. like the studio wasnt able to shoot all the footage they needed and the editing team is straining to the breaking point to cover the missing pieces and make it kind of come across as a complete product

[hvlplvss]

| all webbed up

| colby brock x reader x sam golbach

summary: sam and colby’s annual halloween party commences. they decided to dress matching once again; spiderman and venom spiderman. and a certain girl has a thing for the spider boys.

warnings: mean!dom!colby, soft!dom!sam, degrading, praise, oral (m and f receiving), creampie,

authors note: this is not edited at all. i just wanted to get this out to you guys!! hope you enjoy!!

word count: 3.7k

the annual sam and colby halloween party was something you’d always look forward to. you’d been invited for the past five years, ever since your friendship began with the two boys.

but y/n couldn’t help herself. she secretly liked the boys. she had for a while now, however she never confessed her feelings. she didn’t even want to confront them to herself.

she knew they wouldn’t like her back. why would two of the biggest upcoming youtubers like her back.

y/n had begun editing the boys’ videos three years ago, once she finished off school. she’d studied media and film, giving her knowledge about everything. sam and colby had saw how well the girl did in her studies and her work and immediately asked her to help edit their videos as they were beginning to have tight schedules.

y/n of course agreed. this guaranteed more time with the boys. which it did. after a few months of working with them, they offered her a room at their house, which she also agreed to obviously.

as time progressed, y/n sometimes thought that the boys felt something for her, but she’d then convince herself she was being delusional. however, her bestfriend, lucia, would feed into the delusion and tell her that ‘they look at you as if they wanna fuck you’.

but that’s what bestfriends do. they won’t turn to you and tell you the truth if you really like someone so much. well lucia wouldn’t.

there was a knock at y/n’s bedroom door, she called out a small ‘come in’. colby walked into the room, his eyes immediately noticing her bare legs. y/n sporting an xplr hoodie, which was yet to be released, and which also belonged to sam.

colby shook his head and then looked at her face, “you hungry? sam said about getting take out,” colby asked.

“uhh, yeah. i just need to finish editing,” y/n spoke, quickly turning back to the laptop and pressing a few keys and the mouse.

colby moved towards her bed, coming to lay next to her. as he collapsed onto her bed, he let his head rest against y/n’s shoulder.

“this shit is freaky,” y/n looked to colby, “don’t get how you guys do it constantly,”

colby rolled his eyes playfully, “come on, you did that one video with us,” colby answered.

y/n smiled at the memory, but her face then contorted into embarrassment, “yeah and i literally cried, colby,”

he removed his head from y/n’s shoulder to look at her, “i don’t blame you! you got targeted the entire night. some of the things you faced had never happened to be and sam!” he comforted her, “what if we invited you again, somewhere that’s not as haunted or dangerous? you’d have me and sam, and i could invite a few others so it’s like a group video?”

y/n considered this for a moment, “maybe,” she said uncertainly, “i’ll see how i feel in the future,”

the blond boy then burst through the door, “what you guys up to?”

colby shook his head, “nothing. just tryna get y/n to get in a future video,”

“you should y/n! everyone loved you on the channel, and we loved having you in the video,” sam added.

“you’re distracting me! i’m trying to edit your video!” y/n smiled, pushing colby back.

sam came and sat next to her, on the other side to where colby was sat. the boys sat in silence, while y/n edited the video.

they’d never really understood how she did it. they understood little things and they could probably survive without her. but y/n understood it to another level. she understood what attracted viewers, what made the video look better and she knew secret little tips and tricks to make the video the best thing.

“i don’t know how you even remember all this,” sam spoke up, said boy standing up and walking to the door, “i’m gonna go order take out now. the usual?” he asked. colby nodded looking at sam, and y/n nodded without looking away from the laptop, sam disappears into the hallway.

colby watched for another minute, before speaking “right i’ll leave you to it,” colby pressed a kiss into the side of her head, “our smart girl,” he muttered, moving off the bed and out the door. y/n couldn’t hide or stop the redness that came to her face. ‘our’. colby had called her ‘our smart girl’. the praise had gotten to her. colby knew it would. he’d picked up on how she reacts to things not that long ago, he of course informed sam. and now they’d started using it to their advantages, just like now.

y/n had told the boys that she would head over to lucia’s to get ready for the halloween party. this was a yearly thing that happened. all because sam and colby liked to surprise y/n with their costume and vice versa.

the two girls had gone somewhat matching. cat woman and harley quinn. not matching exactly, but from the same company. lucia had gone with harley and y/n had chosen cat woman. and if she had to be honest, she felt sexy.

a tight black latex suit covered her body, high black stilettos on her feet, a black cat mask over her eyes and her hand held a whip. y/n’s lips were accentuated with red lipstick, standing out against the dark latex. eventually y/n gave up with holding the whip, she decided it was too much and she’d end up losing it anyways.

“come on, lucia,” y/n pleaded, “we’re gonna be late!”

lucia rolled her eyes, “there’s not even a certain time we have to be there. you just wanna go and see your boyfriends!”

y/n groaned at her words. “firstly, they’re not my boyfriends, they’re my bestfriends and my bosses. secondly i want to go now, because i fucking love halloween! plus, sam and colby throw the best parties ever!”

lucia stood up walking over to her closet to pick out her shoes, which she bought specially for this occasion. “fine, you go get in the car! i’ll be there in a second,” she replied, giving into y/n’s desperation to leave.

“thank you!” y/n grinned, kissing her bestfriends cheek and trying her best to run to the car with her heels on.

she jumped in the passenger seat of lucia’s car and waited. she thought about sam and colby immediately. she knew they’d look good tonight, no matter what they wore. her thoughts were interrupted with her phone ringing. she looked at the contact who called ‘sam🤍’. her phone read. she smiled at the name, admiring the picture of her and sam that came up. it was a photo from two years ago; a photo of sam kissing y/n’s cheek.

she then realised she still hadn’t answered the call, so she clicked on the green answer button and put the phone up to her ear. “hey sam!”

“hey y/n! uh- how long till you’re here?”

“i mean, im in the car waiting, but lucia’s is just getting her shoes on, then we’ll be over,”

“okay great. quite a lot of people have already arrived, but we’ll come look for you when you get here,”

there was some rustling on the other end of the phone. “hey y/n!” colby’s voice boomed through the phone.

“hey colbs,”

“how’s your costume?”

“yeah, pretty good actually. think it’ll beat yours this year,”

“is that so? well, your costume won’t be on for very long, anyways,”

what has he just said. y/n’s eyes widened and she bit her lip trying to hide her growing smile. lucia opened the drivers seat door, knocking y/n out of her thoughts of what colby had just said.

“alright, lucia’s just got in the car! i’ll see you guys soon!”

the boys said bye and y/n ended the call. “speaking to the boyfriends are we?” lucia smirked, pulling out of her driveway.

y/n rolled her eyes, but couldn’t help the smile that came across her face, “they’re not my boyfriends, once again, lucia!” y/n thought about it for a moment, should she tell lucia what colby just said.

“what you thinking about?” lucia asked.

“i-uh, well, when they just rang me, i mean it was a pretty normal call. then, colby started speaking and he made like a really flirty forward comment, and it seemed like he meant it in that way…” y/n explained with a confused tone.

“what did he say?”

“he said ‘your costume won’t be on for long, anyways’. so i took that as we’ll be taking your costume off soon,” y/n replied.

lucia’s giggled at what her friend had told her, “someone is getting fucked tonight!” she cheered, “by the two guys she in love with!”

“shut up lucia, im not okay! they’re probably just messing around, you know them,” she denied.

the girls walked through the door of the house, which was now fully decorated and it looked amazing. y/n had done quite a bit of it, but sam and colby and insisted on doing the rest.

lucia grabbed onto y/n’s arm and led her to the kitchen where there was an array of alcoholic drinks on the island in the middle. lucia took two solo cups and filled it with things that y/n didn’t even pay attention to, due to the fact she was looking for the two boys. “here you go, miss y/l/n,” lucia said, handing over a cup, “wait- what would your last name be if you guys got married. would you be a y/n brock? or a y/n golbach? or would you go double and do y/n brock gol-”

sam and colby appear behind y/n, “what you saying about us there, lucia?” sam asked jokingly.

y/n swings around to face them, noticing them costumes. how convenient. cat woman and spiderman. two spiderman’s to be exact. neither of them were wearing a mask, but they had the full body suit on.

colby had gone with the black version of spiderman. the venom spiderman, obviously. black being his colour. and be looked good, but he knew that. the black bodysuit hugged his abdomen and chest tightly, showing off what was hidden underneath, which y/n craved to get her hands on.

and then sam. the classic spiderman, the costume was popular, but no one could pull it off better than sam. he looked incredible. just like colby, the bodysuit wrapped around him perfectly, accentuating his body.

sam and colby eyed y/n up and down when she turned to face them, smirks rushing to their faces. “she was saying, none of your business,” y/n smiled sarcastically.

“ouch,” sam replied, shaking his head with a smile.

without y/n knowing, lucia had ran off, leaving her with sam and colby, who gave her a nod, too which y/n didn’t even pick up on.

“so, spiderman and spiderman. i’m a little underwhelmed, was expecting something way better,” she shrugged, placing her hand onto colby’s chest to feel the costume.

“someone’s feeling a bit mean?” colby asked with a cocky smile.

“not mean, truthful,”

“mhmm. well, i could say the same about yours y/n. think i’ve seen another cat woman here already,” sam spoke.

“but it’s okay, you’re the only one with our attention,” colby finished. slapping his arm on sam’s back and walking away with him, leaving y/n there, with furrowed eyebrows.

y/n thought she was making it up, or she was thinking too much into it. being delusional, once again.

y/n poured herself another drink, not noticing the oncoming presence. “what’s a pretty girl like you doing on your own, huh?” a deep voice spoke behind her. she perked an eyebrow and turned, coming face to face with a man she didn’t recognise. “i’m daniel,” he informed.

y/n cringed. she already had her eyes on two boys in particular. and daniel seemed to be pretty drunk already so she knew he’d be pushy, so she was straightforward, “and i’m not interested,” she thinned her lips, downing her drink and then walking away.

she wanted to go find lucia, so she pushed through the crowd of people who had made their way onto the makeshift ‘dance floor’, but a hand grabbed onto her wrist pulling her back.

“who was that?” it was sam.

y/n furrowed her eyebrows. how did he even see her? him and colby had left, there’s no way we could have seen her and daniel. “i don’t know. he just started talking to me,” y/n spoke truthfully.

sam’s hands moved down to y/n’s hips, who looked down, screaming internally at the action. “did you tell him to leave you alone?” sam asked, leaning into her ear and speaking lowly, keeping his hands on the nervous girls hips. she nodded quickly, “good girl,” sam moved his right hand up to the back of y/n’s head, holding her. he brought his hips forwards against y/n’s hips, who couldn’t even believe what was going on.

after a minute or so, y/n could feel another pair of hands join her hips, just a little above sam’s. sam leant into y/n’s ear, “be good for colby while i’m gone,” he spoke. sam’s right hand left one tight squeeze on y/n’s hip before leaving her hip. she watched the blond boy disappear into the sea of people.

that’s when she felt colby pull on her hips to press her bum into his cock, which was already slightly hard. he pressed his head into the crook of her neck, then eventually leaving open wet kisses on her neck. y/n closing her eyes and relishing in the moment, was turned around by colby, who looked at her with a dark stare. y/n’s arm locked around colby’s neck.

before y/n could even think about it, colby’s lips were on hers. kissing roughly and messily. there was a clash of teeth and every so often colby would bite on her lip, cause her to whine, which resulted in colby doing it a few more times for a reaction. colby’s hands moved further down her back, reaching and grabbing at her ass.

colby pulled his lips away from y/n’s, “let’s go somewhere else,” he said quietly, y/n’s stomach doing flips.

colby led y/n up the stairs and into her room, seen as it was the closet one to the stairs. as colby opened the door, y/n saw sam sat on her bed. “took you long enough. thought you’d ditched,” sam began.

“no, i’d never. someone just couldn’t keep their hands off,” colby replied, shutting the door behind me.

y/n looked between the two boys, who now stood in front of her. “i’m so confused, guys. what’s going on?” y/n asked, her brows furrowed.

“oh come on y/n. you’re not that stupid. thought you were our smart girl,” responded sam.

“we’ve seen you looking at us. we know all about your dirty secret,” colby said lowly, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear, “but that’s okay y/n. we think the same about you. isn’t that right, sam?”

he nodded in response stepping forward towards y/n, who was now corned by the two boys. “just wanna make you feel good, that’s all baby. can we do that?” sam asked.

y/n nodded shyly. sam immediately went in to kiss y/n, shocking her at first, but then melting into the kiss. his kiss was different to colby’s. colby was more needy, and rough when he kissed, he would bite on her lip as well. but sam’s kiss was gentler. he didn’t bite on her lip, or kiss her roughly. but they were both amazing either way.

y/n felt colby’s lips on her neck, sucking purple bruises into her skin. he moved her hair out of the way, gaining him more and more access.

sam pulled away from the kiss, “go get on the bed, okay?” y/n nodded, moving over to the bed and sitting on her knees, looking over to the boys who whispered to one another quietly.

the two boys finished speaking and walked over to stand in front of y/n. “you gonna be good for us? hm?” colby asked. y/n nodded, looking up at the two. after a few seconds, colby had removed the black suit, showing his boxers, which had a clear outline of his cock.

“go on, make yourself useful,” colby said. y/n reached for the waist band of his boxers, pulling them down. desperately, she reached her hand forward, gripping onto him in her hand, eliciting a groan from colby. y/n stroked him for a minute, before colby spoke harshly, “come on whore, suck my cock,”

y/n squeezed her thighs together, obeying what colby had said. she leant forward and wrapped her lips around his tip, causing his head to tilt back. y/n moved her head forward, letting his cock slide down her throat.

his hands found their way into her hair, gripping her roots tightly, using them to pull her down and back off his cock. he pulled her off, a string of saliva connecting from her lips to his cock. “be good to sam, yeah?”

“use your words, sweetheart,” sam soothed softly, placing his hand in her hair and gently brushing it out her face.

“wanna make you feel good sam,”

“such a good girl, aren’t you?” sam cooed.

sam pulled down his own boxers, letting y/n have a moment to catch her breath.

there was a clear difference in the way sam and colby acted in the bedroom. colby was assertive, mean, rough and straightforward. sam was more caring, sweet and slower with what he did and said. but they both complimented each other in this situation.

y/n licked up sam’s length, taking him into her mouth, “feels so good, baby. so perfect,”

colby had walked around the back of the bed, so he was now behind y/n. he grabbed her by her hair and pulled her off of sam, a whine escaping her lips. colby pushed y/n onto her elbows. “carry on, who’re. take care of sam,” colby instructed. y/n complied, going back to sucking sam’s cock.

colby reached for the zip on y/n’s latex suit, “as much as i love this, it’s gotta go,” colby uttered. he pulled the zip down, slipping the latex off of y/n.

she wore no underwear, nor bra underneath the suit. “such a desperate whore. just wanted to be fucked, isn’t that right?”

“don’t be mean, colby. she’s just needy,” sam countered, stroking y/n’s hair softly.

colby moved down the bed so he was now face to face with her pussy. “so fucking wet,”

he leant in, licking a stripe up her slit, causing her to moan out on sam’s dick. “that feel good, baby?” sam asked, y/n’s head nodding frantically.

colby moved his head further down, sucking harshly on her clit, causing y/n to writhe in pleasure, moaning around sam’s cock still.

colby brought two of his fingers up to y/n’s entrance, slowly pushing his fingers in. he started off with a slow torturous pace, y/n clenching around his fingers. he took note of this, increasing the pace of his fingers and his tongue, which flicked across her clit.

she could feel her release nearing, colby removed his mouth but kept his fingers pushing in at a relentless pace, “you gonna cum?”

sam removed y/n’s mouth from around his cock, letting her breath and answer colby. “yes,” she moaned, “please let me cum,” she begged.

“i don’t know about that. what do you think, sam?”

sam looked down at y/n. she was looking up at him, begging him to say yes, a blissed out look on her face. “i think she can. she’s been so good for us, haven’t you y/n?”

she nodded, “so good for you,”

“cum. fucking cum on my fingers, whore,” colby said, before diving back in, his tounge resuming to flicking back at her clit.

it didn’t take long for y/n to come undone on his fingers, moaning out and her eyes closing. colby slowed down his fingers, easing out of her. “you gotta have a go with her pussy, it’s fucking amazing,” colby told sam, speaking about y/n to him as though she wasn’t there.

the boys had swapped places now, colby stood in front, ushering her mouth back on his cock. rushing in to put his hands in her hair and pulling her down, causing her to gag around him. sam lined his cock up with her pussy, slowly pushing in, causing him to groan. y/n moaned at the feeling, looking up to colby, who’s head was back and his bottom lip in between his teeth.

as sam bottomed out in y/n. he gave her a few seconds to adjust. she clenched around him, letting him know he could move. sam held tightly onto her hips, pulling out of her and then slamming back into her. y/n’s mouth came off of colby’s cock, moaning out. but colby immediately came back in and put her mouth back around him.

they both thrusted roughly, synchronising their thrusts. y/n moaned out around colby cock, closing her eyes. “keep them open, whore,” colby pulled back on her hair, causing her to whine. “stupid whore, can’t even keep her eyes open,”

sam’s thrust began becoming sloppy, puffing into her. “gonna cum,” sam groaned, “cum with me, y/n,”

he reached his hand around to her clit, rubbing harsh circles. “cum for us, y/n,”she immediately let go, her orgasm washing over her. clenching around sam, as he followed suit. cumming deep inside her.

colby sped his thrusts up, stopped deep in her throat, releasing his cum down her throat.

sam pulled out of y/n, pulling his boxers back up. he walked around to y/n, crouching at her face level, “you okay?” he asked gently.

“i’m okay,” she nodded with a smile.

colby had walked away to pull his boxers back on and also grab a t-shirt for y/n, which actually turned out to be one of his own shirts, which she’d stolen.

“sit up angel,” y/n complied, putting her arms through the t-shirt, colby leaning in to kiss her forehead.

the boys sat opposite y/n on the bed, “so what happens now,” she giggled, a small smile on all their faces.

sam shrugged, “we’ll have to see about that. but something will happen soon. i promise,” he hinted, “but for now, we have a party to get to,”

y/n pouted, “but i just wanna stay here with my favourite boys,”

sam nodded, “i’ll go clear everyone out,” he left the bed and went to grab a t-shirt and shorts, which were his, but he’d given them to y/n. he left the room, shutting the door behind him.

colby scooted up the bed, opening his arms for y/n. who accepted with a big smile on her face.

“y’know, i’ve always had a thing for spiderman,”

[pomefioredove]

Hi hi! I have a request

Could I ask for romantic headcanons of dorm leaders(expect melleus) with a so whos melleus's younger sibling and when their on a date all they see is the disamona gang is spying on their date

AHHH help this is such a fun request!! diasomnia stakeout that lasts 5 minutes because sebek starts yelling the second he sees you holding hands with someone

summary: malleus' younger sibling type of post: headcanons characters: riddle, leona, azul, kalim, vil, idia additional info: romantic, reader is gender neutral, reader is not yuu

𝐑𝐢𝐝𝐝𝐥𝐞 𝐑𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬

so we all agree that Riddle is probably the best choice? right?

as in, the least likely to get in trouble with the Diasomnia fam

Riddle, as a partner, is a perfect gentleman. won't even hold hands with you until a certain point in the relationship

(I mean, we're talking about Victorian England-level courting here)

out of everyone, he's the least likely to raise concern

...and yet.

it's probably Lilia that gets everyone worried

Riddle is a little... uptight for his tastes, after all, and Lils doesn't want you squandering your youth on rules and expectations

and so, he leads the great date stake-out

...for a completely inconspicuous mid-afternoon walk through the Heartslabyul rose gardens

you, of course, find all of them peeking at you from over a hedge almost right away

and just barely manage to shoo them off before Riddle sees and dies of embarrassment

𝐋𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐚 𝐊𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐫

GOOD LUCK

it's honestly a miracle that there even is a Leona Kingcholar left to date, rather than a pile of ashes on the ground

(Malleus is a terribly overprotective older brother)

...and he's quite convinced that Leona is dragging you around just to annoy him, specifically

so, what's he gonna do? not spy on you with the whole entourage?

he just needs to make sure you're okay, that's all

you, of course, knew that he didn't like the arrangement from the start, so you've already got an eye out on your dates

by the second or third, both you and Leona can tell you're being followed

...much to his annoyance

it takes a lot of "family meetings" with Lilia mediating before Malleus makes his peace with it

for now, anyway

so help him, if that oversized house cat hurts you...

𝐀𝐳𝐮𝐥 𝐀𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨

everyone is... a little concerned that this is some kind of power play on Azul's behalf

Silver is probably the most worried, being in the same grade as him and knowing how tricky he can be

the original plan was to sit you down and express his concerns to you, and somehow that got turned into Lilia convincing everyone to wear fake mustaches and fedoras and spy on one of your dates in the lounge

(Malleus agrees because he thinks it's funny. Sebek agrees because Malleus does. poor Silver is powerless to stop it)

of course, you notice them right away

that's like... a given

besides the terrible disguises, Lilia and Malleus keep laughing and Sebek is white-knuckling the menu while trying to stay quiet

after that, you have a nice sit-down with everyone to discuss your personal boundaries

Silver gets his talk, after all :)

𝐊𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐦 𝐚𝐥-𝐀𝐬𝐢𝐦

Lilia's failed attempts at convincing everyone that Kalim is a totally great boyfriend (wingman of the year, everyone) obviously don't work well

listen, Kalim is great. it could be a lot worse!

but also, uh...

his life tends to be a little hectic

the last thing the Diasomnia fam needs is for you to get poisoned

...or assassinated in some other grotesque fashion

so, of course, they tag along to a few parties, some dinners here and there...

they get caught pretty quickly, but lucky for them, Kalim is a great host, and so he invites them to just. join the dates

(much to your horror)

Sebek and Silver argue about who's going to taste your food for poison first

which Lilia ends up doing, anyway

(even if it is poisoned, it won't have any effect on him. he might even like it more)

𝐕𝐢𝐥 𝐒𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐞𝐧𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐭

Vil is probably the second safest option on this list

...and, of course, he gets scoped out for the same reason number one does

Lilia considers him just... too strict. I mean, he's young! you're young! you shouldn't be acting like grown-ups, you should be frolicking

or whatever it is kids these days are doing

when the four follow you on one of your way-too-nice dates, Vil is the first to notice

he's definitely annoyed at first, but comes to find the situation really funny

it's like paparazzi, but if the paparazzi were your extremely strange found-family, who are also wearing fake mustaches and pretending to be tourists at the table behind you

he'll let it slide, just this once

...but maybe you'll have more indoors dates for a while

𝐈𝐝𝐢𝐚 𝐒𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐝

Idia has already taken the necessary preventative measures

i.e., never actually going out for dates

if you want to eat something together, you can just come to his room for ramen and anime. what's so great about cafes and restaurants, anyway?

if you need some new scenery, he'll design a VR room for the two of you

it's pretty hard to spy on Idia- he's got a hell of a custom-coded security system on all of his devices

and besides that, Lilia was the one who set you two up in the first place. why would he be worried?

...okay, maybe the rest of the Diasomnia fam is a little concerned that you're dating someone who hasn't seen the sun in years

but you can handle yourself!

(he may still be receiving hundreds of very strongly worded and untitled emails from Sebek, though)

[junibgoode]

Bowie and Noah are both gay stereotypes, just of different times

Ok hear me out. I very much agree that Noah was written as "the gay kid" archetype bc that was the gimmick for gen 1. this is ESPECIALLY apperant in s1. like 90% of his line delivery had some amount of sass to it, as apposed to a straight up a deadpan(obviously that's present but rewatch it and tell me there's not an amount of flare to the delivery). some rapid fire queercoding. 1. the way he runs and his high pitched scream 2. his aversion to physical activity to a degree that distinguishes him from the rest of the cast 3. the ear kiss/cuddle. obviously a gay joke. that only scrapes the surface too(not even getting into s2/3 where the queercoding was him just having chemistry with various male characters). so obvious stereotype that was covered up by fresh TV with emma(JUSTICE FOR EMMA TOO I LOVE HER). personally I think he's gay but I can see him as bi too. just compare him to other 2000s gay characters. very clear similarity.

bowie IS canonically gay. and while I don't think he's the "this is my only personality trait" level of gay stereotype, I think it's clear there's aspects of his writing that are that. I'd complain more but Raj kind of displays existing as a gay character without stereotypes and most TD info we talk about is fanon anyway bc ultimately this is us giving way to much depth to a fake reality TV show(/pos). anyway he is but in a very different way. the way he dresses is the modern stereotype just like how noahs(button ups and sweater vests) is for his time. his attitude has a lighter air. more fun. he's built less skinny and more lean with sports abilities.

they're both very clearly gay characters but it's so interesting how they're very clear examples of the era. which ngl all of TD is. it's like watching the passage of time at certain points.

[harkonnin]

* The heart is not meant to rule *

Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x Atreides!Reader

Slow burn, knife kink, blood kink, strangers to lovers, softer!Feyd-Rautha, CONSENT, 18+, arranged marriage, assassination, poison, murder, etc

Chapter 1 - Introduction Chapter 2 - Beginnings are such delicate times Chapter 3 - Eclipse Chapter 4 - A Time of Quiet Between the Storms Chapter 5 - Harkonnen Arena Chapter 6 - Water of life

*****

After a few more, albeit boring, days on Giedi Prime the Baron agrees on allowing you and your family to return to Caladan. He also states that Feyd and a bunch of servants would shortly join you once you’re settled again. This was code for ‘make sure the castle is up to standard before I send Feyd over’. Your father obliged happily; he even cracked a smile at the Baron. Very unlike him but happy to return home, as were most of you.

As soon as you return home you are greeted by your loyal subjects and ushered into the bathing areas. There’s a lot of toxic grime to wash off you, Giedi Prime really wasn’t the best place to visit, let alone live. You sat in a hot bath of rose salts and contemplated Feyd’s arrival, the things necessary to make his stay more pleasant. You’re pretty sure that the standards of living were better on Caladan, so besides personal interests, there wasn’t much you could do.

In the next few days you discussed the guest rooms, seeing if everything would be fitting for the Na-Baron. You had to admit you were quite excited at the prospect of seeing Feyd again, experiencing him out of his comfort zone, on a planet that didn’t worship him. Like a fish out of the water, which Caladan had plenty of. You wonder if he ever even saw the oceans before, the green fields you had, the scent of a Caladian rose, the feeling of a fresh fish in your hands after having captured it… there was so much unspoken positive anxiety in your mind that it slowly dawned on you that you started to develop feelings in a certain way.

*

After about a week, the Harkonnen arrived. A huge, pitch-black ship landed on the green fields and your entire family stood outside to greet them upon arrival. As the ship door made a shushing sound whilst opening, your brother looked at you, a small smile on his lips. You mouthed ‘what’ at him, also smiling. He smiled a bit deeper and shook his head. “Nothing”, he said, whilst putting his hands up defensively. He was mocking you, he obviously read your body language these past days, and it was safe to say that you were looking forward to this moment a bit too much. You had been found talking to servants about the amenities you all needed to provide in extensive detail, you’ve never really cared that much about a guest before, but somehow now it involved your potential soon to be husband, and everything needed to be perfect.

Paul thought it was endearing, he would always be the protective older brother, yet seeing you genuinely interested in a formal setting like that also made him happy inside. He planned to have a talk with Feyd in the future before anything ever happened, to make sure you would be taken care of. And if not, there would be consequences. But for now, keeping the peace would be the simplest.

The ship door had fully levelled, and people started to walk down and out of the ship. It was slightly clouded on Caladan, almost always, so everything was a bit dimmed and dulled out. Everyone was dressed in formal wear, your father had on his military jacket, so did your brother. Your mother was dressed in a light blue flowing dress with a hood, and you were wearing a green to white gradient flowing dress, a very different view than the clothing you wore on Giedi Prime. Feeling safe at home and free, the dress expressed the colours of your house and the way your planet looked for outsiders. If you had to say so yourself, you looked stunning. The wind softly making your dress sway and making the dress even more alluring.

You spotted Feyd from the small crowd now in front of your family, also in formal attire. Harkonnens stood for strong and contrasting black and white colouring, so it was no surprise to see him in a full black outfit. A leather top with long sleeves, and a thick wide pant combined into a statuesque Na-Baron who had a very imposing and cold demeanour. When your eyes met however, he smiled at you, making your heart skip several beats. It still felt extremely strange to you that you were so affected by him, knowing the history and the place he came from. Seeing him murder prisoners, the fact that he attacked you on your first day, the speculation that he might’ve murdered his own mother… everything was a red flag, and yet you didn’t want to give up on him for some reason. Maybe this time seeing the best in people, or giving everyone an equal chance, would end up killing you. But it wouldn’t be like you to not at least try once.

*

Feyd had been travelling for a few days prior to landing, being utterly bored in the ship. No one to train with, no one to pester. None of his family joined him, as he would be fine in the care of the Atreides, so all he had was a few servants to sit with. He all but locked himself in his quarters preparing for the arrival on Caladan. When they finally did, he jumped up, almost ecstatic about finally getting out of this ship. Or so he thought. He was looking forward to this meeting most of all, taking the days long trip happily a few times over to be able to see you again. He had been opposed to a forced marriage, but that didn’t stop him from thinking about you.

As he got dressed for these unnecessary formalities, he decided on an outfit that would strike fear, something that would set him apart from the people on Caladan. A servant knocked on the door to announce they would be landing soon. Feyd hurried to the door of the ship, walking with determination. As the door opened with a loud noise, he started to smell the scent of your planet. A petrichor reached his nose, fresh and earthy. A hint of salt, and a feeling of a dusting of rain on his face. He closed his eyes and took it all in, the air felt extremely clean here, it was like he had never experienced such an innocent feeling from nature. He chuckled to himself, weirdly enough this reminded him of you. How the both of you enveloped the feeling of your home planets so well.

The light that shone on your planet was soft, and the colours struck him. He wasn’t used to going off planet, and neither were his servants. This was all very new and overwhelming in a way. There were some servants who even exclaimed softly how beautiful this was, looking at the green grass like they had never seen anything like it before. They started to move out of the ship, and he saw you standing on a small platform with your family. You seemed to be in conversation with your brother, both smiling. Struck by your beauty and gentleness of your soft smile, his breath hitched in his throat, not being used to this feeling he started to wonder if the oxygen on this planet was trying to choke him. Realising he was not, he swallowed hard and started to move out of the ship after the servants.

As he started to approach your family, you turned towards him, and your eyes met. He kept your stare and started to feel his palms sweat. Being nervous was not an emotion Feyd often experienced, certainly not with women or people weaker than him. He smiled at you however, trying to calm himself down. When you smiled back, he felt his worries disappear. You had that effect on him, and like a drug he didn’t want to quit that feeling. He vowed to himself to make you smile more often.

*

After some long moments of formalities, you were all finally sat at the dining table, Feyd had been shown to his quarters earlier, and pretty much sent all the servants back home, save two. He had no interest in being babied, and wanted to experience Caladan like you would. If need be, he could always ask one of your ‘servants’ to do something for him. Little did he know that your family didn’t have the concept of servants, and instead the people helping and looking after your family were all here because of their own free will. People that would go through fire for their duke and his family. Feyd would soon come to understand all this, but for now, dinner was served.

The food on Caladan was vastly different, more fresh and more direct than the food they ate on Giedi Prime. There were huge plates of fish and wild animals, complimented by the freshest greens and fruit you had. The dining table was a lot smaller than Feyd was used to, and he was sat in front of you again, but able to reach you with his legs. You were aware of this however and decided to keep your legs tucked under your chair for now, not wanting to illicit a reaction that could be misinterpreted. Feyd seemed to enjoy the food however, you imagine he had been hungry since the food on a traveling ship is always a bit depressing. It’s more survival food than anything else. The conversation between your father and Feyd was pleasant so far. Leto thanking Feyd for taking the time to experience Caladan for the time being and asking him if he wanted to have training days with his best warriors. Feyd almost rolled his eyes at the idea that there would be anyone who would be able to beat him on this planet, but he reacted honourably instead.

It felt like he was going beyond to impress you, to be as respectable as you had wanted. You realised you might’ve been a bit too harsh on the Harkonnen and on Feyd. You relax in your chair a bit more at the revelation and allow yourself to drop your guarded expressions. Feyd notices the shift in your body language, like the predator he is, and makes eye contact with you. You give him a soft smile and his eyes soften a bit at your honesty. You let your legs stretch out a little bit and accidently brush Feyd’s foot. You don’t dare to look up however, knowing full well what his expression might be.

You clear your throat after a few more seconds and look up at Feyd in a slightly more guarded way. You excuse yourself and express gratitude towards Feyd and his servants for making the trip all the way to Caladan. Tomorrow would be the day that you show him the land, castle and people that make up your culture, your history, lineage, and all the sort that makes House Atreides what they are. You decide to retire early and make the most out of your sleeping schedule. Feyd stands up as you do and bows before you leave, expressing his interest and how he looks forward to tomorrow. It’s slightly off putting how he says it, but you decide not to let it get the better of you.

*

 You had much difficulty trying to get to sleep, tossing and turning often. You never really have dreams like your brother does, you sometimes see very faint visions but can almost never recall what it meant. Last night was exactly like that. You keep dreaming of the wet, damp grass under your hands, but none of it means anything. It just seems like 1% of the actual scene that’s being played in your subconscious. You wish you had more insight, but that would require more Bene Gesserit training, and you really did not want to do that. So, for now all you had was that moment in the grass.

 You get out of bed and go to the en suite bathroom, splash some water in your face and prepare for the day. Be it lack of sleep, or you not being on guard on your home planet, you decide to wear something more casual. You assume that formalities are now over, and Feyd would be a temporary guest instead of a representative of house Harkonnen. You hope he also drops the formalities, as this seems to make the tension appear higher than it should be. You have nothing to fear on Caladan, besides the need of wanting to stay. A problem for later honestly.

As you leave to get some quick breakfast you notice a servant of Feyd near your bedroom door. You look at her and she looks down immediately, she seems innocent enough, but so did the servant that poisoned you. You’re cautious at this point, but walk up to her nonetheless. She notices you coming over and addresses you.

“Lady Atreides,” you notice as she speaks that this was the same servant girl that spoke to you about the history of the Harkonnen, who told you about Feyd’s childhood. “It’s nice seeing you again, uuh-“ you linger, not knowing her name. “What’s your name actually? Sorry, I never asked.”

You see her freak out a tad, her eyes wide, you definitely overstepped a boundary of some sort. She hesitates long enough for you to feel pity for her.

“… Tula, my lady.” You sigh happily, “tell me Tula, why are you here?”

She looks up at you and smiles softly, it’s almost strange to see a Harkonnen servant girl smile. You truly wonder if Feyd has ever hurt her, already feeling pissed off if he ever did.

“The na-Baron has asked me to give you this, as a token of his appreciation.”

She holds in her hand a blade, pitch black and engraved. It has a dark green shine on the hilt and a foreign looking shape to it. You feel like this is a kind of wealth your family is not used to, it feels expensive. It’s also incredibly sharp which makes it one of the deadliest items you’ve ever received. You realise that this type of gift coming from him means a lot. It feels like he’s showing you a part of his heart, like he’s being open with you about his intentions. Although it could also be a challenge.

“Tell me,” you say as you take the blade in one hand, “on Giedi Prime, is giving someone a blade a gift or a challenge, because I need to know if he is going to attack me later or not”.

Having heard about your first encounter, Tula chuckles, which makes you smile at her some more.

“No no, my Lady, this is quite certainly a gift, he made sure of that”, she points out a tiny red hawk in the engraved portion.

You look at it up close, it looked like extremely intricate work. You’re amazed he managed to get this made in less than a week. Tula sees you stare at the knife and decides to speak up.

“If the Lady has no more requests, I shall return to my quarters”, she speaks softly.

You look at her, deciding against conveying a message to Feyd via her.

“Maybe I should introduce you to our friends in the castle, I seriously doubt Feyd needs all your help right now. Just relax and take in Caladan while you’re here.”

She looked paler than usual, maybe you were testing her limits more than you should. It was important for you however that the servants also had a good stay. Since you had no intention of abusing your power anytime soon, the difference in an Atreides and a Harkonnen, so to speak. She went dead quiet as she ushered her to follow you as you introduced her to some of the castle staff. There weren’t too many people working there, but the few that did, were to be trusted.

As you left her in the capable hands of the people that practically raised you, you made your way to your quarters again. You put the gift, the blade, on your nightstand and admired it for a few more minutes. It was impressive that for someone so atrocious, brutal and primal, he had the instinct to do something that might be considered weak and nice. It was like he was pushing against the boundaries in which he was raised, trying to see what it would be like should he have chosen his own path.

Speculation, of course. For you couldn’t trust him for now. And he had no intention of marrying you, so you wondered what his plan was with you.

*

As you make your way towards Feyd’s quarters one of your staff members informs you he already left his bedroom earlier this morning. She mentions he said something about needing training and requested for a strong fighter to be his training partner. You already feel sorry for the person who got tasked with that.

You go down a flight of stairs and walk a tad faster as soon as you hear the grunts and breaths of two people fighting. You turn the corner and see Feyd wrestling with Duncan. You decide to lean against the wall and study them both. They looked like they had been at it for quite a while already, both too stubborn to give in or stop, or both equally intimidated and wanting to prove themselves. Their wrestling match ends up in Duncan being flung over Feyd’s back and pinned down with his long legs, his arm in a tough position, where it could be snapped within any second now.

You decide to break up the tension.

“I think we have a winner,” you shout.

Both men perk up at you, slightly shocked at hearing you. Feyd let’s go of Duncan’s arm and unwraps from his torso. They’re both sweating and Duncan’s hair is undone. He smiles warmly at you, and you go up towards them. He tackles you into a hug and picks you up, you exclaim from all the sweat you’re feeling. Feeling instantly dirty and a tad embarrassed that Feyd is watching you through all this, you tell him to put you down while laughing.

Feyd’s expression was hard to read at this point, he was glistening with sweat, the sun making him look paler than before. You look at him awkwardly, almost saying sorry for this entire display, but Duncan breaks the silence for you.

“I thought you were going to snap me in half, Harkonnen.”

He weirdly compliments Feyd’s fighting ability as he lets go of you. Feyd’s eyes still on you.

“I still might,” he says, as he turns his glance towards the older man. He takes it in for a few seconds, “I believe you might,” he turns to you “Is it true what they say about him, my Lady?”

You cock your head to the side and take a good look at Feyd’s expression. The last thing you want to do is offend your guest.

“That he’s a formidable fighter?” you reach out to your scar, and he watches your hand, his expression once more guarded, unreadable. You smile softly at him, trying to lighten the situation. “I’ve seen it first-hand, just be glad this isn’t a knife fight.”

Somehow that didn’t lighten the tension, as Duncan just realised what that scar meant. He frowns and looks over to Feyd.

“Did you do this?”, he said as he got in Feyd’s face.

You try to de-escalate the situation by trying to talk to Duncan, but the damage was done. Feyd Interrupted your start of a sentence and got closer to him.

“I caught her roaming the halls of our palace with her weapons in her hands, she looked like a foreign assassin to me. I only did what was natural.”

His tongue like a viper, enjoying this moment of peacocking in front of you. You honestly didn’t want this to turn south, as both men had a point, but they were overreacting right now.

You decide to step in between them, facing Duncan. A clear signal that as the Lady Atreides you had to defend your guest in this moment.

“You can’t let him do this to you,” Duncan says.

You look over your shoulder at Feyd, his eyes burning into yours, you trusted him to not do anything rash. You took a glimpse of his cheek, where the scar you left him was still a pink-ish tone, indicating that you cut deeper than he did. As you turned to the front again you noticed Feyd had gotten closer to you, standing firmly behind you.

“As you can see, I didn’t just let him.”, you hope this is enough for now to convince Duncan that you were fine, and that your first meeting was just, weird at best.

You had no idea what Feyd was doing at this point, but Duncan did. Feyd kept staring at you, it unsettled him. He feared for your life at this point, but knowing his position he also knew he had little to no say about these agreed upon formalities.

“If you ever need anything, you know where to find me.” He spoke to you. “As for you, if you ever hurt her, I will know where to find you.”

And with the end of that threat, he leaves. You keep your eyes on him as he leaves, sighing softly. It almost felt sad to you, he seemed hurt for some reason. You hope he comes around soon, since losing Duncan would be one of the worst things that could happen to you.

Feyd waits until you turn around, looking up at him. He was a looming presence, everywhere and always. You also just noticed that the clothes he wore were somewhat casual. A long sleeve black top with a harness on top of it, long sleek pants and tough boots. His top was sticking to his torso like it was hanging on for dear life. You couldn’t keep yourself from looking down a bit, mesmerised by his muscular but slim body, his soft white skin contrasting the harsh black colours. The sun probably didn’t help to cool him down either.

You feel a bit more relaxed now that Duncan is gone, the awkward peacocking having stopped now. You look up at Feyd and your eyes soften.

“I’m quite impressed by your physical prowess, Feyd,” praising him like that would surely calm him down a bit but having worded it like that made him chuckle almost. Y

ou just realised the innuendo you spoke and turn a bit red in the face. He creeps closer, only a few inches from your face. He smells like dew on grass, having rolled around in it all this morning.

“What did my Lady think of her gift?” he looks down at you, his breathe hitting your face softly, taking you in for the first time today.

Noticing you were dressed more casual today, less uncomfortable. Formalities were also something that restricted Feyd, he understood having the need to feel at ease, in whatever skin you wanted to portray yourself that day. He appreciated the fact that you dropped formalities with him, making this transition to Caladan all the easier for him.

You start to walk, your arm making a sign for him to follow as you do. He joins you on your right side.

“It looks absolutely gorgeous Feyd. I’m extremely flattered at the craftsmanship that went into it, thank you.”

His hands are resting behind his back, so you can’t quite shake his hand. So instead you just smile up at him. He loves the way his name rolls off your tongue, how softly you say his name. No hate dripping off if it whatsoever. He was new to you, and you felt like someone who wouldn’t judge a person based on hear-say or looks.

“It was made by our finest craftsmen, the blade itself made from a meteorite that shared your birth year”.

What the hell.

“How-? How did you find a meteorite like that? On Giedi Prime?”

He actually chuckled; you still had a lot to learn about the Harkonnen. The amount of wealth they had was something you couldn’t fathom. An Atreides getting a meteorite stone would take weeks, months if it was a specific one, and it would also be an investment rather than a simple purchase. You weren’t poor, but Feyd’s richer than thou chuckle made you feel it.

“House Harkonnen could give you everything your heart desired. Anything.”

He looked at you intensely, meaning every word he just said. You’re a bit taken aback. Feyd keeps trying to woo you but has also expressed his need to stay a single man. He can’t have it both ways. You will not be someone’s concubine; your parents might love each other but they should have been married a long time ago. You will not share the same faith.

As you open your mouth to discuss such matters, Gurney Halleck walks just around the corner with a group of soldiers, all in military dress up. It has been weeks since you’ve seen him. He always gave you the feeling that he was this grumpy but attentive uncle you had, even though he wasn’t family. In your excitement you didn’t realise you had walked over to the group and hugged Gurney. He was all smiles and hugged you back, the men also greeting you. As you had some small talk, he brushed some hair out of your face and squeezed your arm as he said goodbye.

Feyd realised that the people of Caladan loved you, you were well respected as the Duke’s daughter but most of all, loved. Not feared like him. He realised you had enough prospects that could marry you if they were given the chance and opportunity. And it seemed you had a good relationship with all of them, not to say this made him jealous. The way you were engaging with them, touching them, and how they were touching you. It made him seethe with anger. You were supposed to be his, his betrothed. He felt possessive over you, protective but also controlling. He never really cared that much for anyone, or at least he thought that this was “caring”.

Gurney moved past you to go and shake Feyd’s hand, introducing himself as weapons master to house Atreides. The Harkonnen reluctant to shake his hand, making it awkward for everyone in the room.

“… Come on now son, I don’t have all day”, he spoke.

Feyd sees you staring at him and feels the need to at least show some niceties to your ‘servants’. He gives Gurney his hand and squeezes it strongly. The older man just laughs, and you softly sigh to yourself, apparently quite tense at the situation at hand. They break the handshake, but Feyd is giving him a death stare. It wasn’t uncommon for people your age to have dabbled in, let’s say, intimate intercourse with servants or staff members, certainly before getting sent off to get married for political reasons. The fact that you were unabashedly talking to all these men sent Feyd into a mental spiral. He started to assume things that weren’t there. Call it insecurity or possessiveness, both came from a lack of control in his life.

Gurney bids you both farewell and makes his way towards the barracks with his men. Feyd notices some of these men were eyeing you up, their pupils dilated or he noticed a difference in their breathing. As they moved past him, he shot his eyes back at you, but stayed quiet. You feel something shift uncomfortably in your stomach, had you offended him? Was this all too casual for him, having to meet people he would deem as lowly servants?

There was an awkward silence between you two, as you walked back to enter the castle. You decide to speak up, the tension killing you inside.

“My Lord Na-Baron, did I offend you in any way just now?” you choose your words carefully, not wanting to upset him any further.

You saw his jaw tightening as you spoke, something was definitely wrong.

“If my Lady wants to explain herself for her behaviour, I will gladly listen.”

He spat out, voice more gravely than what you were used to. You are taken aback and blink a few times as his words go through your mind. You stop dead in your tracks. He doesn’t notice until he’s a few steps ahead.

“My… behaviour?” you softly speak. “I don’t know if it’s normal for someone of your stature to be in close contact with your soldiers like that. On Giedi Prime you would be labelled… promiscuous.”

There was nothing funny about the way he said it, he was not smiling, yet you felt the need to huff a laugh at him. He had the balls to call you a slut in your own house. Your own planet. After seeing you be nothing more than friendly with people who have known you since childhood. The Harkonnen truly were a different species of human, their entire belief system was built on an insecurity and distrust of others. It was clear to you now, Feyd would never allow you to stay as free as you were now. He’d rather lock you up in a cage, like a bird, in his possession.

“It’s funny how you think I should not be allowed to sleep around if I wanted to, when you have your own set of concubines to choose from back at home.” You snap back at him, sounding more vicious than you planned to. Tit for that.

He looked anything but pleased at that. Remembering he had murdered his concubines for the sheer sake of their jealousy towards you, he now had nothing back home in that matter.

“You are promised to ME, and I will use everything in my power to keep it like that,” he says as he gets closer to you, “I will not let you forget it either,” he grabs a fistful of your hair in his hand and pushes you against the wall in the castle hall.

You grunt and your hands automatically go towards his strong arm. He’s looming over you at this point, you’re reacting to the pain on your head from his unnecessary violence. Tears start to form in your eyes, his grasp softening a little bit. Your breathing is heavy on his lips, he’s close, much too close.

“Let go of me,” you struggle to get the words out without sounding pathetic.

At this point a tear falls down your cheek, over your scar. He trails it with his eyes then looks back into yours.

“I will never share you with anyone, you’re much too pretty for that.”

He’s saying all these nice words, whilst pinning you against the wall. You’re about 3 seconds away from kicking him in his nether region but realise he still had a hand free, which would most likely result in you falling to the ground and hurting yourself, so you decide against it.

“What does it matter Feyd?” you manage to spit out at him.

He loves seeing the fire behind your eyes, your defiance, even if you’re put into a weaker position. He searches for someone who can hold his interest, who has the same intensity as he does.

Instead of answering he waits for you to elaborate, cocking his head to the side.

“You said you have no-no intention of marrying me, so why does it fucking matter to you?!” another tear drops from your eye, a real one this time.

Your insecurity shining through, your need to be worth it for someone, even if it was a psychotic Harkonnen. You stop trying to push him away, and let your hands go soft around his arm. You stare up at him with your teared up eyes, hoping he understood that you weren’t here to fight him.

He believes your honesty, he also realises you’re probably a virgin, since it’s truly uncommon that a woman your age would have done anything before marriage. It also doesn’t seem like House Atreides is built on the satisfaction of personal needs, but the needs of the many. He has no friendships on Giedi Prime, only servants. He loves seeing you all needy for him, but also realises he hurt you in the progress to get to hear those words from you. The last thing he wants is an unhealthy relationship between you both.

He lets go of your head, putting his hand on the wall behind you. You’re still stuck between the wall and his tall figure, holding his arm for the little stability you get from it. He looks down at you, eyes filled with lust and his remaining anger. You're staring at each other and you feel your heart pound in your chest...

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA for making a formal complaint about the carer for a terminally ill child?

CONTEXT: I am a librarian at a private school in Europe. prior to me taking over the position three years ago, my predecessor established the library as a place where students could be supervised by her at nearly any time with less than five minute's notice. i hate this circumstance but naturally other staff like things this way so it keeps happening after I've asked for it to stop.

I was approached in December about this permanently extending to a student who is terminally ill (this is their last year being able to attend any classes). At the time I thought that their one-to-one assistant/support would be accompanying him to the library, is it is his job to be with that child nearly all day, except when he trades off with someone for breaks (the other person is mostly a substitute but has taken on 5 extra hours for this situation to work out). if there's someone with them, obviously they don't need me to supervise them and I can leave if i need to eat/go to the bathroom/etc. these "library breaks" aren't planned in advance, they're based on how their cognition is that day and stress levels in certain classes that have become more difficult as their condition worsens. I agreed to the situation with the understanding that I would be providing the space, not the supervision. everyone on their care team (class tutor, both carers, school nurse, home-school liaison) has first aid training and much more details on specifics of their condition.

The situation is that now the carer is dropping them to the library and then he is leaving. I've had to miss lunch multiple times in the past fortnight. i spend the time they're in the library alone with me terrified that something is going to happen and i won't be able to help. i hate being left for sometimes an hour in charge of this very ill and very vulnerable child. a few times he's left them with me while I've been teaching a workshop or working with other students. when the regular carer is with the kid (most of the time) they just show up and then he leaves. i don't get any notice. the substitute usually gives me a heads up at the beginning of a class period that they'll be there, but she also stays with them so there's no problem for me. the regular situation is extremely bad for me.

i want to complain formally about the carer doing this. the obvious consequences will be that he will be monitored to make sure he's not leaving the kid unattended and management will start doing spot checks. he may have to do extra courses at home on safeguarding. if anyone else has complained about him, he'll be put on a PIP.

i feel like i might be the asshole because I'm fairly sure library time and his lunch break are the only times that he gets any respite from the situation. he's been the carer for this kid for about five years and knows them really well, and the decline in their condition is hitting him really hard. he will not only lose the extra breaks but he'll gain more work and scrutiny than he's had before, during a really hard time in his life. i don't know what to do to improve my situation except complain, but I know I'll be making his situation way worse. please be harsh.

[lo-fi-charming]

so i've been keeping up with TMP as it's airing, which has been fun, it's actually really nice to experience this kind of story weekly since i came into TMA late and listened up to the s4 finale in like, a month or two. i've been enjoying the new characters and statements, and while i was worried i'd have trouble actively listening (my attention span/executive functioning can be really variable when it comes to podcasts), it's been surprisingly easy for me to actually listen to each new ep the day it drops publicly

all this to say im enjoying the show! but i've found myself feeling increasingly frustrated with a couple things i keep seeing when it comes to discussions of it

to me, it seems... there's been a pervasive reluctance to take TMP as what it is. and i do understand that. it'd be stupid to pretend TMP doesn't exist exclusively because of TMA and that show's success, that it's a successor that was pitched as being similar. it's a story being written by the same people (plus guests), in the same universe (roughly), going for about the same tone and maybe themes.

i just feel like it's a bit of a shame, though, that so many folks seem unwilling not to carry TMA with them when they're engaging with TMP

i don't know where or when it was said, but i swear there was a comment made by jonny and/or alex about how TMP will have some commonality with TMA in terms of world-building, but also, people who listened to TMA first may find themselves theorizing in the wrong direction because we're judging things based off what is no longer concrete, reliable information; things are going to work differently in the world of TMP, and since we have preconceived notions on what is relevant or how things work, that's going to influence how we engage with information presented in TMP if we let it. and that's not even considering the fact that they've been explicit in conveying the idea that TMP was written so you can experience it fully without having listened to any of TMA at all!

i'm very much someone who tries to engage with media on its own terms, largely taking things at face value until i'm given reason to suspect otherwise. that's something i'm trying my best to still do with TMP, even though obviously, i've also listened to TMA and am basing some of my thoughts and personal theories on what we know from that

but that's what i mean to say i guess, it's something you have to actively choose to do. and it feels like, just based on what i've been seeing in fandom spaces, that a lot of people are having a bit of an odd time with TMP because of a reluctance to do that?

i think the easiest way to explain what i mean is to point to a general acceptance, already on the level of fanon it seems, to interpret the computer voices as Our Jon and Martin (+ Jonah/Elias, maybe). now obviously we have the actual real world reason why their voices are present in TMP, because of course jonny and alex were going to come back as voices in the show in some way. and i 100% agree it's a perfectly logical conclusion to then interpret their inclusion as being related to Jon and Martin somehow. i'm personally very into the theory that it is in no way them - not in any way that matters - but specifically their voices that have been stolen (by the Web?) as a means to help spread fears in other realities. but that's really not how i've been seeing people play with the concept? it seems largely 1:1. and again, i totally understand where people are coming from with that - especially when you consider how it can be a super fun concept for horror and angst, or even just the fact that folks want an excuse to carry their favorite characters into this new show and still play around with them. i promise i don't mean to bring this up as a means of making anyone feel bad or like, chastised for interpreting things a certain way and playing in the space!

it's the biggest example of what i mean though, and was a huge point of frustration for me when we were first being presented with TMP. it's not just that i don't want the voices to be Jon and Martin proper (i am very into their Ambiguous End, i believe it's best to leave that as a space for fans to play in); in all honesty, i think it's kind of a shame and maybe even a bit boring (im sorry!) to be engaging with TMP this way

and it's not just stuff like that - i've been seeing a fair amount of people expressing frustration and feeling disappointed with how TMP is hitting, but i mean, i feel like that's inevitable when you're going into it expecting More TMA? i saw at least one person basically say "ive been waiting for it to make me feel the way TMA made me feel, and it hasn't yet", and i really just feel like that's setting yourself up to be dissatisfied! beyond the fact that we're only 5 episodes in and the story has barely gotten a chance to happen yet, a huge element of this new show is that it's being approached as a largely collaborative effort, it seems, with lots of guests coming in to help shape the story and more writing and plotting influence that isn't jonny

obviously it's fine to not be super into that! undoubtedly it's a question of taste. but you do have to acknowledge that that's the case and adjust your expectations accordingly, or else you're not going to have a great time

i really like TMA, i had a great time with it, but even if TMP is a sequel to its parent podcast, it's not the same thing - and personally, i don't want it to be! i do hope that's a sentiment that is able to be more widely felt by some fans as we gain more distance from TMA while TMP is airing. i just think more people would be able to enjoy it that way, and come up with more interesting theories and interpretations of things! but those are really just my own personal thoughts

[rongzhi]

what did you mean by reblogging that post about the uyghur genocide in china? can you elaborate?

Means I agree with what op said

If you want some elaboration with points to jump off, you can read the direct follow up to their post. Check out the notes as well. I think this post (yes, it's a reddit post. There are links within) also has a good summary of some things. I don't really keep a bookmark of better sources but again, you can use the discussions for jumping off points if you like—there's a number of links from both "sides". I highly encourage you to do your own research as there is much back and forth on the issue, but I think you will find that there is a certain... spottiness... a sort of general Lack of substance but a lot Spin when it comes to the mainstream reports/sources you will generally find on the topic.

I think as you read, it can all very shocking to read the reports by the Guardian or the BBC or whoever, and that points to something that I agree with in the post that I reblogged initially: "Of course, any decent person would rather believe a claim of genocide than deny it out of basic morals, and that's part of what makes it so sickening."

I think with what's happening in Palestine, there has been some renewed discussion about various genocides happening globally. I have seen more than one well-meaning post on this site that has included Uyghur genocide on the list of genocides to stand up against. Now I'm not a particularly politically vocal person—have not really ever said much about anything on this blog until more recently—and I've never really posted on "Uyghur genocide", not even when I started this blog during COVID lockdowns and was getting anons harassing me/demanding I answer for such things (something that has died down a lot, either as I have never responded or I blocked all the anons who were doing that), but the charge of "Uyghur genocide" has always weighed very heavily on my mind; first, a couple years ago when I first learned about it, due to the sheer horror at the idea; then as I started to periodically look into it, due to a sense of guilt over the possibility that my increasing suspicion of its falsity was a sign that I was falling complicit to covering something up. But frankly I don't think that's the case. But, it really is fucked up and vile and I thought OP of the post in question summed up exactly the root of that particular emotional facet.

My own two cents (what little that it's worth) is that in the harshest light possible, you could say that there's a likelihood that human rights abuses have been committed in some cases in the broader deradicalisation effort the government has implemented. I do think that that there is likely a level of prejudice or at least an othering of especially those who live in rural Xinjiang or in bordertowns far removed from the cities (regular rural alienation in other words). Obviously none of this is "good" and should be ignored or deemed necessarily acceptable, but none of it is genocide, either. And by overshadowing any police mistreatment or such with a charge as serious as genocide, it also does a real disservice in terms of rectifying anything short of it (including the claim of "cultural genocide").

That's all I have to say about it really.

Edit: fixed typos

[ghcstao3]

Please give me more from Sope obviously about everything that is happening around him and ghost who all this time thought it was just friendly.

I need the dinner and how they realise that they are the best thing in the world for each other.

it is my honour to expand on soap being oblivious

-

“…I mean, I’m not gay, but—I can appreciate when a man looks good, y’ken?”

Ghost pauses. Really pauses. As in, his forkful of food is held midair just out of reach of his next bite just so he can look at Soap. Really look.

Because he must’ve hit his head at some point to have thought to say something so… strange. Wrong, Ghost wants to think.

Now, Ghost realizes there isn’t a lot about life that he can be completely sure about. But when Soap had approached him—after months of back-and-forth flirting just teetering over the edge of something friendly, after growing and festering feelings developing between them—and asked Ghost if he wanted to go for dinner some time, just the two of them, Ghost had been certain it was a date.

And now Soap is here, sitting across from Ghost with his own fancy dinner, saying this. Unbelievable.

With a deep breath and one last incredulous look, Ghost sets down his fork. Folds his hands over the table, leans back in a chair that has no right to creak beneath his weight with the price they’re paying to be here.

“Say that again,” Ghost demands.

Soap stops mid-sentence, drawing his eyebrows together. A frown—pout—graces his lips, and maybe a minute prior to the present Ghost would be overcoming to urge to kiss it from Soap’s face.

“…I’m not gay?”

Ghost blinks. Levels Soap his most unimpressed stare in the hopes the cogs would start turning without further prompting. But Ghost isn’t so lucky, clearly.

“Why are we here?” Ghost tries instead.

“To eat dinner?” Soap winces like he knows the answer is wrong, but not like he knows why.

“At a nice restaurant,” Ghost says. “Just the two of us.”

Silence falls over them, nothing to break the sudden tension beyond the muted chatter and clinking of cutlery from other patrons.

“Can two friends not have dinner together?” Soap asks meekly. He’s finally begun to sound unsure of his words, shrinking in on himself under Ghost’s questioning gaze.

Ghost sighs. Softly, he urges, “Why did you invite me here, Johnny?”

Soap’s mouth opens and closes a few times as he works through this new problem like it’s an equation to solve, a mission to execute. He sits back, face contorting in deep thought before it eventually goes slack, wide-eyed and naive realization appearing as Soap finally looks back up at Ghost.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

Soap drags his hands over his face, cheeks blooming a deep red as he groans into his palms. Ghost can’t help but watch on with a deep but fond exasperation.

“I just—I—this whole time—“

“Don’t need to explain yourself,” Ghost hums. He takes the opportunity to finally shove his forgotten forkful into his mouth. “Glad we could establish this is a date.”

Soap peeks out between his fingers. “You’re tellin’ me you… you agreed to this, thinking it was a date, while I—God, Simon,” he huffs. “You have awful taste in men.”

“At least I know when to come to terms with it.”

Soap scoffs and kicks Ghost’s shin under the table. “Haud yer wheesht.”

Ghost snickers. He jabs his now-empty fork in the direction of Soap’s plate. “Eat your food. Want to make this a real date later on.”

Soap’s face somehow turns an even brighter shade of red.

But he obliges.

And Ghost is very glad to know that he could, in fact, be certain about this one thing.

[obxsprincess]

MIGUEL OHARA!BESTFRIENDS DAD AU

warnings for age gap, and taboo concepts

you were attending collage with your bestfriend, amara mae. you’d known her since high school — both of you giggling and kicking your feet when some certain boys texted you two late at night. and buying shit loads of icecream when the same assholes broke your candy sweet hearts. but you always had eachother

but you never actually met maes dad, sure, you heard him on the phone now and again — but amara was secretive over her home life, especially when her parents got a divorce. you never pried, only ever provided a comforting ear when she ranted on. and of course you couldn’t blame her, divorce was tough, especially with two parents who already hated each other

infact, that’s the reason you found yourself agreeing to her supportive proposition — amara was able to get through the hardships of parent divorce, but you were just at the beginning of it. two parents, non stop yelling, and a life to finally live… you needed to get out of there.

so before you knew it, you were pulling your-far-to-heavy luggage through her door. you two were going to the same collage anyways, so living with her was pretty reasonable. but you were grateful nonetheless — your usual delicate grin curling on your lips as you glanced at mae behind you, dramatically panting because ‘you brought so god damn much!’

you were about to stick your tongue out at her when a deep, sultry voice startled you “language mae” — head wiping back as you eyes met… his. and immediately, your pretty head began to spin. his eyes were deep brown like coffee, yet brimmed in a golden honeyed hue. his skin was lighter, yet equally as sun kissed. adorned with a stern set jaw and dark subtle. his frame was sinfully glorious. so tall, so bulky, covered in rippling muscle you were sure he could lift a car. mr. o’hara

he was so handsome, so insanely built that you almost flinched when he reached his hand out, and you almost missed the tug of his lips when your eyelashes fluttered up to meet his eyes — his whole presence radiated charm, but you tried to hide your gape as your pink manicured hand found his, which was so large.

you let out a surprised squeak as he pulled you into his incredible frame — obviously just trying to be nice “good to finally meet you, estimado, finally getting to meet my daughters bestfriend” glancing at amara who was too focused on your luggage to notice the way his whole body enveloped yours — his giant hands positioned on your lower back, lingering for a tauting mere moment before he leaned down to your wide-eyed level. “and your even lovelier than I imagined, cariño” you felt the flustered heat that creeped to your face — charming smirk playing on his face in return.

you nodded a dumb answer as he released you from his embrace.. god, why did you feel so dizzy?

and why did he have to be so handsome? before you knew it amara was dragging you up the stairs — excited to show you god knows what as your sweet eyes glance behind you. “thank you for letting me stay with you both, mr. o’hara” you babbled as if you were the most innocent thing to ever live

“please, call me miguel” you swore his eyes sweeped over your body, and you were like a doe caught in headlights. but you had to stay that ditsily dizzy — because your tummy flustered at his attention, and oh god, this couldn’t be good

but you were still your bubbly, innocent self — so you flashed the most attractive male you ever met a sweet grin, and hustled upstairs. this was your bestfriends dad for petes sake ! this was going to be an interesting year…

[the-saltiest-saltine]

Noncon Chrollo HCs with fem reader? 🥺 How would he approach getting what he wants from reader? If not willing to compromise does he just take?

I think he would be willing to take what he wants by “force,” but I see him 99% of the time going the gentleman route with reader after taking her. Not just in the intimate sense, but in all aspects of how he interacts with you.

He’s obviously still an ass (he’s Chrollo lol), but I don’t picture him as someone who’d physically punish or outwardly mock his darling. In the same sense, I don’t think he’d immediately go the “pin them down and rip their clothes off” route if he was denied. But I honestly love the high libido Chrollo hc lol.

So, would he be willing to force himself on you? Absolutely. But the way in which he does it would less likely be in the traditional, primitive sense (he sees himself as above that), and more likely to be coercion, manipulation, having you under the influence, or as some sort of deal for privileges or to get out of a punishment or something.

I don’t think he’d necessarily wait until a certain point in the “relationship” to try to get intimate with you. He’s a guy with urges. Regardless of if you’re going on “dates” with him or still try to scratch his eyes out when he looks at you, it’s more a matter of time rather than progress - after a few months, he’s getting seriously pent up.

It’s a sort of dilemma for him. He wants to maintain his gentlemanly façade so he can hopefully ease you into it and get you willing, but he’s so eager that parts of it slip slightly, making you less likely to give in.

If you’re “responsive,” as he puts it, he’ll ease you into things. We all know how great this man would be in bed, especially if it’s your first time - he’d whip out all his best tricks and technique and you’d be just goneee lol

If you’re not, he’ll up the ante. The façade will continue to slip, but he cares less for it now - what’s the point in exerting himself if you aren’t going to give him what he wants either way?

He’d give you more punishments, hoping that you might try and offer him your body to get out of it. If you do, he’ll simply eat up the opportunity, tasting your apprehension and humiliation in more ways than one. He’d love to see the conflict in your eyes as you lie beneath him, trying desperately not to react to his touch or shove him off you.

I think his next step would be slipping you an aphrodisiac. It’d be useful in several ways:

First of all, of course, its effects would make you more likely to give in to his whims, or even ask him for it.

It’d also be a way for him to get you to agree to completely unrelated non-sexual stuff too. If you agree to wear that dress, or be good on a date, or have a conversation with him about his book, he promises he’ll touch you. It’s amusing to see how frantically you agree to whatever he asks for.

Plus, if you somehow manage to deny him (and yourself), the unquelled burning inside of you is a fitting punishment for your stubbornness.

I think the aphrodisiac would be a last-ditch effort. Sure, he could use a Manipulator’s ability to incapacitate you, force you to kiss him, and have you strip and spread your legs while you beg for him. But it’s not just a matter of desire - it’s a matter of pride. To have you wholly under his control while he takes what he wants would ruin an important part of the pleasure for him: knowing that you, on some level, wanted your kidnapper to please you, to touch you, to fuck you.

Eventually, your obstinacy leads Chrollo to his breaking point. He’ll wake up one morning and just know. He’ll give you a stare over breakfast, and it’ll seem off. Sure, none of them were ever particularly comforting, but you can’t help but shiver from his gaze, what’s usually a void in his eyes being filled with something insatiable. The tension throughout the day would be almost tangible, hanging thickly between you two. Eventually, you might catch on to what’s going to happen.

He knows you’re getting paranoid, but can’t really bring himself to care. Of course, he wishes things could’ve been different, if only you weren’t so stubborn.

He’s almost trembling by the time you go to take your evening shower in the bedroom’s ensuite, mind flooding with tainted images of you as always. But there’s an extra element this time, one that sends shocks of electricity through him - tonight, all that he’s pictured is going to happen. You’re at his mercy, and you’ll beg for him.

By the time the water shuts off, his eyes are clouded and his pants are straining. You’re smart enough to always bring your change of clothes to the bathroom, so he won’t see you in nothing but a flimsy towel. But the comfort and protection it brings is purely psychological. The bathroom door opens, steam wafting into the bedroom.

He’s on you before you even know he’s in the room. He picks you up before you have time to react, throwing you on the bed and kissing you. His tongue invades your mouth as you try to pull away, with one hand holding your wrists tight as the other starts to pull down your pyjama shirt.

You’re crying now, but he doesn’t have any sympathy for you. You chose to be stubborn. You chose to test his limits. And now you’ve broken them.

The look of surprise, of confusion in your eyes is what irritates him the most. How could you have possibly not expected this? He’s a thief after all - it’s only natural he takes what he wants, and the fact that it took him so long is a mercy of the highest honour. So you shouldn’t hope for any from him tonight.

[wolven91]

Drifting - Part 3

The Nerve Suit was skintight and left nothing to the imagination.

Casper had already tried plucking the thin layer of jet black second skin away from himself, but hadn’t been able to get any purchase on it with his covered fingertips. Looking back to the mirror, the only thing exposed was his face and shaved head. The young man grimaced, he’d never been one for hair styles, but cutting off his messy brown curls had been an unpleasent twist that he hadn’t expected when agreeing to this experiment. Glancing down in the mirror, he instinctively covered himself, the suit rendered him genderless at a glance, but it was still rather obvious after more than a passing glance.

“Casper?” Came a voice and the now telltale sound of robotic legs whirring and walking towards the room the human was stood in. He glanced back at his normal clothes, then at the mirror again.

“In here.” The young man called out. The sounds of the robotic legs go louder until he saw Wren appear in the mirror in the doorway to the room. She was atop her bipedal robotic platform that most geckins used around anyone larger than their single foot in height.

“They’re all ready for you. Last chance to run without anyone seeing.” The foot tall green geckin offered without emotion in her voice. Neither judging, nor leading him in a certain way. Casper suspected that she had her own horse in this race, but out of everyone who the young man had spoken to; she’d been the most warm.

“This is going to be fun.” Casper began, convincing himself as much as her as he turned and, whilst trying to ignore that he was very much on display to her, she matched his pace as he marched toward the hanger. Speed and stride wasn’t a problem for the geckin, at least not for their platforms. They could outrun Casper at the push of a button, completely ignoring they’d outlast him with the fusion cores that powered them.

“It’s certainly going to be interesting, but why would you use the word ‘fun’?” Wren asked calmly, keeping the conversation light, but still obviously monitoring the man. The small green geckin had become his doctor and psychologist of sorts. Carefully watching him and seemingly keeping the more extreme ‘Zeet’, the head engineer, in check.

“Well, we have media and fantasy stories about piloting mechs. Whole franchises that are built around the concept of bipedal or multi-legged technicals. Apparently, I’m living the dream, and I didn’t even need to train for it.” Casper shrugged, feeling oddly disconnected from the current events.

 

“You understand this is unlikely to be easy right?” The small green alien gently pointed out. A glance down at her and Casper noted how her neck ruffle was pulled tight against her. He gave her a wane smile and nodded.

“Oh yes, Zeet has explained at length that it’ll be like learning to walk again. Moving an arm or leg on its own, is its own thing. Even all four limbs is another level, but I’m going to be controlling a thirty-foot mech, dealing with its balance, its systems, everything.” Casper grinned and chuckled as they entered the hanger proper, and the noise went up significantly. Casper had to raise his voice somewhat to ensure Wren could hear him, she had to practically shout back at him.

“He made a big deal that I would struggle to balance it without a tail.” The human said with a smirk.

Wren grinned a sharp grin.

Taking a moment to look up at the giant machine, Casper could only be impressed.

The mech itself was a rough translation of a human body. Two legs, two arms, a torso and a head on top. They had toyed with the idea of a more mobile machine, with digitigrade legs or even giving him equipment for his first outing, but Wren had been present and argued them all down. In the end, it was her pointing out, not for Casper’s safety, but the cost of breaking or damaging complicated equipment if the first piloting effort failed.

No point in having a fancy jetpack if a panicked human trigged the jets and crashed into the ceiling, rending the bay unusable for the foreseeable future.

So as Casper gave the giant bipedal vehicle a critical eye, he noted that it was surprisingly thin. The legs were slim, several meters wide to a normal human, but compared to the rest of the mech it felt like they were too small to lift such bulk. Likewise, the arms were malnourished, obviously barebones. He could see pistons and wires. They were all strapped down and had metal plates protecting them in places, but this mech was not designed for anything other than an experiment.

A prototype. Saying their true mechs often looked like geckins; digitigrade legs for explosive speed and massive mechanical tails for balance. Casper had to guess that this was the first, truly humanoid machine they’d made… and only in the short space of time too.

Their industry capability was frightening.

“He was quite upset that he had to remove the tail section of the mech. No point in adding parts and complexity for the first step.” She pointed out, that wasn’t something Casper had heard yet. Interesting. The next time Casper spoke, it was to Zeet in the form of a short, sharp ‘good luck’ and nod.

“You look ready, like a real geckin pilot.” The blue geckin pointed out, gesturing to the skintight Nerve Suit from his position on his own mobile platform.

“Just a bit taller.” Casper grinned, but realised he made a faux par with the immediate frown form Zeet. “Sorry. Nerves. The suits pretty tight, I didn’t realise it would be like this.” The young quickly said, running a gloved hand over his stomach. Thankfully, this change in topic was enough to remove the dark look on the blue geckin’s face as they rejoined the conversation again. He had to remember that geckins were touchy about their height…

“Yes, well the Nerve Suit is needed to ensure the body has as little feedback from your true body as possible. It should be plenty light as it’s only a pawful of atoms thick.” Casper pulled a face and rubbed his fingertips together. He felt pressure, but not sensation other than how slick his grip was.

“You ready to climb in? Remember, we’re just calibrating. Remember; don’t be disappointed if you can’t run yet, all we’re looking for is movement. Wiggle the feet, twitch the fingers. Look up and down.” Zeet rambled, nervous all of a sudden at the prospect of the human experiment. He continued to run through a check list of basic movements.

“I understand Zeet, I’ll do my best for you.” Casper promised, unsure if he could reach out and touch the shoulder of the geckin, or if that would be too far. Was he supposed to be the nervous one? With everything going on with humanity, it seemed impossible that they would allow anything to happen to the young man. Like walking along a tourist bridge and it has a glass floor; this was all simulated danger, not real danger. Right? Casper turned to the mech itself and headed towards the team of technicians who were waiting for him. They were crowded around the open hatch where Casper would climb in like a pack of scavengers waiting for their prey to fall over.

The clamber into the pilot chamber wasn’t the issue, nor was the coffin-like pod that required Casper to lay down with his arms crossed over his chest, it was the needles. The pod pressed in on his legs, hips and shoulders, his arms were still free for the moment, but would be locked into place when the sarcophagus’s lid came down into place. The inside of the casket was filled with a gel that had given way by several inches as he sat down, then shuffled himself in. If he was struck by anything, or more likely; fell over, the gel would absorb the impact to his physical body. It would also swell, once he was sealed, securing him in place.

“Legs in place!” Called one of the techs as they fit a breather over Casper’s nose and mouth.

Then, after a moment, Casper was stabbed.

Along the various rivers and paths that followed his nervous system, hundreds of hair thin needles all stabbed into him like a wave of bee stings, causing the human to grunt and flinch. The shoulder locks stopped him from moving too much as the techs gave curt nods that all was well. Then a series of five needles thrust into and along the young man’s spine and he lost all feeling of his body.

His eyes snapping open and gasping at the sudden pain and of a fear that something had gone wrong! He couldn’t move!

Zeet appeared in his vision, next to two of the techs that were disconnecting tubes from the mech itself.

“You’re good. First disconnect from your nervous system is always the worst they say. We’re about to give up control on the mech, you’ll be in the dark for a few minutes, but that’s it. Blink twice if you understand.” Asked the blue geckin, staring down at the human. Without a voice, the young man, blinked twice.

“Outstanding, good human. Lets get this closed and submerge him. Casper? You’ll hear me over the radio. Follow my instructions. You’re going to be seeing the world from a whole new perspective.”

Casper tried to nod but was reminded again that he couldn’t move at all. He just laid there.

Flat on his back, from the perspective of a corpse in a grave, looking up at the techs and Zeet, as if they were mourners about to throw the first handfuls of dirt upon him.

Then the lid of his casket slid closed and sealed against him. He felt pressure on his body as the gel filled casket embraced him and then all was still. He couldn’t move, he couldn’t see or hear. He couldn’t smell anything. His body wanted to twitch, to move and kick. But even when he tried to test the limits of the pod, of the gel, he couldn’t feel anything. He couldn’t even tell if he was moving!

Panic was rather rapidly growing within his chest as he lay there, alone in a sensationless void.

Was this what death felt like?

“-asper? Casper can you hear me?” Zeet’s voice appeared in his head.

He tried to instinctively respond, to say ‘[Yes]’, but immediately felt and knew it was pointless, his [paralyzed throat and mouth meant talking was out].

“Excellent! We’ve got your feed here. You don’t need your throat anymore.” Came the excited reply.

[What?]

“You’re connected to the machine’s transponder. You talk, or try to talk like normal, and we will read you.” Zeet explained, Casper could hear the excitement in his voice.

[Is everything okay?]

“It’s going fantastic! We literally just turned this system on and you’re already communicating with us. You’re a natural, human! You ready for more systems?”

With nothing better to do, Casper thought of his reply.

[Sure, let’s do it.]

“Alright, give me a minute.”

It was a strange method to talk. Casper could… feel? The correct way to communicate. It wasn’t his unprocessed thoughts being transmitted. He could feel what he was sending to Zeet, like he was approving every syllable. What information the human wanted to send, was sent, and nothing more. There was no tone, no emotion. His words, thoughts, sentences, were words on a screen.

Light appeared, briefly blinding Casper, who squinted, and the hangar immediately came into focus. His head was drooped forward and for the most part he could only see the floor that had been directly in front of the mech itself. There were geckins down there all running to and fro. Focusing on one, Casper’s vision rapidly zoomed in and he could see each and every individual scale on the yellow geckin tech’s face, before Casper relaxed his eyes a fraction and his vision pulled out slightly. The geckin tech monitored a console that sat beneath the tower where Casper had entered, seemingly unaware he was being watched.

“Okay, we’ve turned on your external cameras. Do you feel any new sensations? Any sort of… connections that you can access?” Zeet asked carefully.

[I can see.]

“Yes, we want you to access those so you can see out of the cameras attached to the recon unit.”

[No Zeet, I can see. There’s a yellow geckin at my feet.]

“You can- Hoy! Who’s below us?” Zeet shouted, Casper could tell it was loud, but the radio wasn’t being ‘heard’ in the sense that the human wasn��t using his ‘ears’ to hear the radio. He was… understanding it without the need for such things.

As Casper watched, the yellow geckin reacted, looking up and waving his arms up at someone before shrugging.

“You’re right! You’ve already… Hah! Okay then. This is beyond what I was hoping for. I think we can jump a few steps.”

“Sir, this is ill-advised.” Wren voice said, coming over the radio loud and clear.

“You’re here as a courtesy doctor, you’re welcome, but now as a courtesy, you will not interfere with my work.”

[What’s happening?]

“We’re going to disconnect you from our power and control. You will have full control of the mech and its systems.”

[You said that was dangerous?]

“For a normal pilot yet. But your aptitude for this was off the charts. I think it’s time to jump a few levels.”

There was a flurry of activity as the geckins who were milling about at Casper’s feet suddenly began disconnecting from the various consoles and began disappearing from the edge of the human’s vision. He could see the metal platforms that counted as the mech’s feet, but aside from that and the bottom of the tower, there was just the hanger floor.

“Alright, we’ve got everyone to a safe distance. In a few seconds, we’re passing control of the whole mech to yourself. We won’t be in control of anything. You ready?”

[As I’ll ever be.]

“Good. Hand off in 3… 2… 1…”

The change was sudden and startling. Immediately, Casper’s legs buckled as his knees weren’t prepared to take the sudden weight of his body once more. His arms flung forward as the ground rushed up to greet him, but he stopped himself from bouncing his head off the concrete by completing a half press-up.

There was too much, too fast. His body felt, stiff; tight. Like he’d been in a cramped position for so long that his whole body was sluggish.

It was too much. Casper felt lightheaded, as if he was suffocating! His heart was pounding in his chest so fast that it was humming! A giant metal hand reached up and clutched at his metal torso, sparks flying as the two metals clashed against each other.

[Something’s wrong!]

“It’s fine, just activate your intakes.” Zeet ordered calmly, despite the panic rising.

“He’s panicking, eject him.”

“No, he just needs to start up the intakes. Casper? Your reactor needs air flow, active the intakes.”

“Power it down Zeet! His vitals are spiking.”

[I don’t. I can’t. My chest feels tight!]

The human was panicking, he could feel something was wrong, like he was running on empty, like he needed to close his eyes and lay down. It felt like he was dying.

“Casper! Batteries are running low, active the intakes!”

The words were less clear now, like his mind was swimming. The young man felt for the first time since getting into the machine his vision failed, like he was blinking despite not needing to before now.

Wren’s voice broke through the roaring and nonsense that Casper was being bombarded by.

“Breathe Casper! Take a breath!”

The human sucked in air as deeply as he could shocked that he had forgotten such a normal thing.

From outside, the vents that lined the pectoral area of the mech slammed open with great turbines that sucked in the vital oxygen needed for the reactor that sat in the centre of the mech’s chest. It burped to life and the exhausts along the back of the machine began to spew heat and a cough of black smoke. To the geckin engineers, the ever-pleasant noise of a system booting up to full power whined to life as the human mech heaved in an oddly biological movement.

There were no ‘lungs’ built into the machine, only vents, fans, and a reactor to power it all, but the way it was gyrating, put only the image of someone who had been suffocating gulping in air into their minds. The mech was currently on one knee, the other leg folded to support its weight. One arm was placed on the ground and the second was still touching the chest plate, scratching the bare, unpainted metal.

[I’m okay.]

“’Breathe’ doctor?” Snapped Zeet, not addressing or not seeing the text on his console that Casper had sent.

“He’s not trained on the technical specifications of a machine. His point of reference is what he can feel. What he knows.” Replied Wren, defensively, but not backing down.

“He said they had media of mechs, that it was a common fantasy. What popular media doesn’t have common sense specs?!” Barked Zeet’s voice.

“He’s not a geckin, he’s human. The importance of certain subject will be different.” She replied, still sturdy in her observation.

The voices in Casper’s head continued to bicker as the world stopped swimming and he slowly raised his head to look around. He felt less sluggish now, like he had started to shake the cobwebs from his bones and movement was easier, as if he was awake again. He felt strong. Fast. As if his body not just wouldn’t fail him; but couldn’t.

== 0 ==

To the outside, whilst Zeet and Wren continued to argue the toss, the techs watched as the giant mech’s recon unit raised up and scanned the hanger. With a great heave, one of the legs raised the body up in a single smooth movement before the second leg straightened and held the giant mech upright and proud.

The mechanical hands, simple things, were raised as the cameras of the recon unit that sat atop the mech inspected them, as if seeing them for the first time. This was more than any of the techs had expected. New pilots barely got their radios working after the first hour, let alone movement. Why was it so… biological in its movements?

“Sir?” Called the head technician, up at the two geckins that were still arguing over utilizing the correct terminology in a professional setting and pointedly ignoring the several hundred-ton mech that was now moving around in a manner that was thought impossible for the timeline.

The mech took a single step forward, then a second.

“Sir?!” Shouted the head tech again, more urgently now.

Thankfully, Zeet and the good doctor paused their debate to look round, only to realize the mech was no longer where they left it.

It was currently headed towards the great metal shutter that blocked the outside world from the hanger. Beyond the shutter was the proving grounds, where pilots that had finally fully integrated with their mechs would prove that they were ready for furthering the geckin interests.

[r/WolvensStories]

[Ko-Fi]

[mikkeneko]

On that other post I made about “you do not have the obligation or the right to control how other people engage with media,” one of the examples I listed was “people are consuming media they’re too old for/people are consuming media they’re too young for.” And one comment I see popping up in the notes of that post is some variation of “I mostly agree with this post, except for the point about kids consuming media they’re too young for. Obviously I’m against that.”

And I feel like this is one of those points that freedom-to-read has conceded too easily, the right of young readers thrown under the bus because OBVIOUSLY we’re against minors being able to access inappropriate things! OBVIOUSLY we don’t want to expose THE KIDS to THE TERRIBLE THINGS. Obviously, we still have to protect people from content they’re too young for!

We don’t.

And I could fill in here a standard argument about how queer resources are always going to be up-rated when it comes to age restrictions because of how they’re viewed as inherently more adult/sexual/inappropriate than their cishet counterparts, and how this blocks queer kids from getting the resources they need, and that would all be true, of course.

But we don’t need to Protect The Kids From The Bad Books in the broader scale either!

There’s a long rambling essay to be had here about my own experiences as a kid reading media that was considered ‘not age appropriate’ for me, and how for the most part it was all stuff I was fine with (Lord of the Rings, Clan of the Cave Bear) and on a few occasions it was stuff I wasn’t  fine with (Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, Candyman) and it upset me and I wished I hadn’t seen it. But what it ultimately comes down to is this:

Kids need to be able to learn where their limits are, and they need to be able to set their own boundaries, as a part of learning to be an adult. And part of the process of learning to do that  is to come up against stuff that’s outside  their limits, and stepping back from it. And they can’t do that if they’re being artificially restricted from mature content.

A certain amount of upsetting experience is part of this process,  and it doesn’t need to be traumatizing if  the kid in question has control over their own engagement. Frankly I can’t think of a single more gentle and controllable way to test their limits than in a book, where there are no images, no sounds, and the kid can disengage at absolutely any time simply by closing the book.

They have to learn to draw their own borders sometime. Let them learn at their own pace.

Would it be better if kids had trusted adults in their lives guiding them through mature content, who intimately understand the kid’s sensitivity level and can recommend appropriate materials, and provide a supportive framework for working through material that turns out to be upsetting? Sure. Absolutely every kid in the world deserves an understanding, compassionate and supportive adult. But since we can’t legislate the existence of good parents, the absolute least  we can do is allow kids the freedom to control their own choices.

[red-pill-to-swallow]

How to be attractive to men and my goals

Hey babes,

like I said – I want to incorporate RPT (Red Pill Theories) into my daily life immediately.

A few things that every women within the community seemed to be content with were:

1. You are never finished with glowing or leveling up. Never stop learning. Never stop trying to better yourself.

2. Pretty privilege is real.

I agree that pretty privilege is very real. I mean, I get affected by pretty people like everybody else, even if I don’t do it on purpose. It’s just something that is ingrained in our brains and I need to learn how to take this to my advantage.

I think I have a decent starting base, because I’m a skinny white woman in her twenties with long blonde hair. I am not really tall – even short men are at least 5-7cms taller than me – but I’m also not extremely short.

I have a petite frame but my body-shape is something between an hourglass and a peach. My face is average – I don’t really have striking features or am a natural beauty model – but my features also aren’t hideous. It’s really just something you can look at without thinking too much.

On a scale, I would rate myself a 5,5-6/10 on an average day and I guess that’s great!

But how can I make myself look better on a daily basis? I really took hours to research how I could make myself more attractive to wealthy and high value men.

Obviously, no man is like the other and every man prefers something different. One man might like tattoos and piercings while another man with the same social status thinks they are hideous. I don’t want to completely change who I am and I don’t want to spend thousands of dollars for it.

However, I really like this whole clean girl and old money aesthetic that is going viral on Tiktok right now – and I think those two aesthetics could fit me and my personality really well.

Most wealthy men seem to like this traits in women:

1. great skin without obvious pimples or enlarged pores

2. long and healthy hair in a natural color

3. straight white teeth

4. clean nails on both hands and feet

5. hairless legs, armpits and at least trimmed pubic hair

6. wearing clean and wrinkle free clothes without any holes

7. wearing a nice smell that is fitting to your overall appearance

I think those are the basics and they can be achieved by almost anyone. If you can’t afford braces make sure that your teeth are always perfectly brushed and that you’re keeping up with your dental hygiene in general.

In fact – if you have problems affording certain beauty procedures, research how to get as close as possible to them with DIYs.

For years, I always wanted to be the mysterious woman in the room. The woman with a dark aura, the woman that doesn’t speak much and remains most of her life a secret.

Well, I am not this woman even if I’m trying very hard. It would be an act that I would put on and I am sure that everyone in the room would notice.

I am naturally very bubbly and I love having conversations with people in general. I would also say that I have a broad knowledge on different topics and that I’m able to talk to almost everyone.

I am also very welcoming and I enjoy making people laugh and have fun in my presence. I tend to have strong opinions and I’m not afraid to take on a discussion.

With everything that I know about myself now, I made some points that I need to tackle in order to level up:

1. stop oversharing. Being bubbly is great but not everyone needs to know everything about my business. Sometimes it’s just better to be silent and to listen.

2. start with exercise again. I am happy with my weight but I am extremely weak and I have almost zero muscle mass. My breath is getting heavy if I have to take the stairs and my legs start to hurt after roughly 15 minutes of walking. I plan on going for a walk every day and doing pilates 3x a week.

3. start doing my hair and makeup again. My hair is long and blonde – so it is an eyecatcher. It’s also very healthy but I usually just throw it up in a bun or in a clawclip, so no one is really seeing it. I have multiple styling tools at home and I need to start using them. The same applies to makeup. I have so much great stuff that looks really beautiful and natural but I am just too lazy to use it. I plan on taking 20 minutes every day to do my makeup and to suck it up – because I usually always do a double cleanse at night, so it’s not really a struggle to take it off in the evening. It’s just inconvenient in the morning.

4. taking better care of my skin and of my dental health. I have high quality skincare and I love doing my skincare but sometimes I’m just too lazy. Let me just say that it doesn’t happen often – but still too much for my liking. Also my dental health – I need to make a dentist appointment asap. I think the last time I went was around 3 years ago!

5. buying better fitting clothes. I don’t like shopping for clothes but it is what it is. Right now I only have cute lounge sets for being at home but when I go out I usually only wear jeans with a basic top and sneakers. I want to look more polished and feminine. I want to stop wearing jeans and focus more on pants, skirts and dresses. Also literally any other shoes than sneakers.

6. go out more. I’m your typical homebody. Movie night? Reading a book? Ordering food? Count me in! I always have fun when I go out but I’m still mostly at home and I want to change that. I want to have a group of like minded friends that want to hang out with me. Maybe even at home. Lol.

I really thought hard about those six points but I think those are the first things that I need to tackle down.

In the end – I was asking myself: what could I do to feel the most comfortable with spontaneous outgoings and meeting new people?

It came down to wanting to look my best. Obviously. I want to make a good first impression and maybe even profit off of pretty privilege.

I’m sure we all know those times when we’re dressed like slobs and suddenly an opportunity to go out arises and we decline because it would take hours to get ready.

That’s the reason why I want to get ready in the morning – so I would only need to touch up if anything came up.

see you soon!