#and she was like wow you have a phd in this show

[prncewilhelm]

can’t stop thinking about the significance of wille wearing erik’s watch during their first time together after the video (ok, i know that sounds weird but hang with me). after they’re together for the first time in season one, we see wille put the watch on afterwards (out of shot on the screen, but it’s still there and implied). the watch we know is symbolic of erik and wille gets it after he dies to symbolise him taking the role of the crown prince, taking erik’s place. the fact he puts it on after the two of them are together in season one, shows that their relationship and his role as the crown prince are separate. the fact he wears it in season 2 during their time together, shows that his role as crown prince and their relationship now exists as one. there’s no separation. 

[themultifandomgal]

Could you do an established relationship jay halstead x petite reader? She’s in the fbi, has a PhD, and is quite young. (She’s like 25-27) She’s shy and pretty innocent. Jay introduces her to the unit. When they meet her they don’t see how she’s an fbi agent. Then the fbi takes over a scene and she’s a total badass. Jay is proud and he’s like that’s my girl.

Jay Halstead- My Girl

I absolutely loved this idea! I had so much fun writing this one. I hope you enjoy!

No one knew about Jays girlfriend, in fact everyone thought he was single. So when Jay arrived at Molly’s with a petite woman on his arm, everyone was shocked to say the least, even more so when Will gave her a hug and the pair looked like they have known each other for a while. The noise of conversation and clinking of glasses filled the air as they made their way to a table in the corner. It was a Friday night, a rare occasion for Jay and his colleagues to be out all together.

As they sat down, Erin, his partner, was the first of Jays coworkers to greet the couple

“Im so happy you could come. Who is this lovely lady, Jay?" she asked, her tone laced with curiosity.

Jay smiled proudly and replied, "This is YN. My girlfriend. She works for the FBI." YN, who was naturally shy and reserved, gave a polite nod but said nothing. Erin's eyes widened in surprise, she looks over to Jay shock written all over her face

“Oh wow you’ve kept her quiet Jay” Jay just shrugs in response.

Through the evening the drinks flow, but YN continues to stay quiet, just observing the space around her

“So FBI huh? You seem too quiet and innocent for that line of work”

YN simply smiled and shrugged, used to this reaction from people who underestimated her based on her demeanor. She was well aware of her ability to blend in and appear unassuming, a skill that served her well in her line of work. She knew that her quiet nature was one of her greatest assets, allowing her observer others and gather crucial information for her cases. As the night went on YN and Jay finished up the evening and headed off back home.

YN sat in her car, staring at the building in front of her. It’s been 2 weeks since she met Jays coworkers and now she’s been asked to help the intelligence unit with a tough case. She steps out of the car and strode confidently towards the entrance, her gun hidden securely in its holster.

As she entered the building, she was greeted by the sight of her boyfriend Jay and his boss Voight, both standing in the lobby, waiting for her

“YN thank you so much for coming” Voight says holding out his hand. Immediately YN takes his hand in hers, shaking his hand

“No problem, happy to help”

“Please follow us” Voight takes YN to the bullpen where the rest of their coworkers are standing around a bulletin board

“You all remember YN” Jay says first

“She’s joining us on this case” voight tells everyone who greets the girl

“So what do you know so far?” YN says getting straight into the case

“We know that Doms father owned a huge farm down state. When she died Dom inherited 30 million” Antonio hands over the case file to YN who takes a look at all the information at hand “he took out 10 million 2 days before he went missing” YN looks up at the team

“Did anyone actually see him though?”

“Taking the money out?” Jay asks

“At all”

“What are you saying?” Erin frowns

“I dont think he’s missing. Did you get the autopsy report on the mum?”

“No, she died of natural causes” Antonio crosses his arms

“Are you positive on that? I want to see an autopsy report somethings just not adding up”

unwavering, her determination driving her to catch the criminal at any cost.

YN got what she needed, the autopsy report showed that Doms mum did not die of natural causes, in fact she was poisoned slowly over time. YNs theory of dom not being missing made him their first suspect.

As they neared the location where Dom was believed to be hiding, YN's instincts kicked in. With a nod to Jay, she signaled that it was time to make their move.

They burst into the building, guns drawn. YN's training kicked in

“On the floor, now!” YN shouts pointing her gun at Dom “keep your hands where we can see them”

In a matter of moments, Dom was apprehended. Jay and the rest of his team watch the girl they once thought of as quiet become this confident woman. Jay watches on, feeling a sense of pride and love. That’s his girl who he’s extremely proud of.

[sirenlulls]

get him back! → theburntchip

pairing , theburntchip x youtuber!reader

summary , where, in lieu of yours and chip’s reconnection, fans find out how it happened, and just why you ended things in the first place.

part one (bad idea, right?)

oh, i wanna get him back! 'cause then again, i really miss him, and it makes me real sad

🔴 Y/n L/n Talks On Breakup, Reconnection, The Launch Of Her Brand, & More! FULL POD EP.77 -Saving Grace

join premiere!

LIVE CHAT !

user: stop i’m actually gonna cry ☹️☹️☹️

user: I KNEW THOSE TWITTER B WORDS WERE WRONG I KNEW THEY DIDNT END BADLY

user: that’s so lala land of them

user: “if i ever complained, i’d be the nagging girlfriend” NO BABY 😭😭😭😭

user: never thought i’d say it but i’m glad they broke up bcs if they hadn’t done it then, it would’ve been MESSY messy

user: off topic but can we please talk about how pretty she is :(

user: “if he ever complained about you, i would’ve given him a belting” YES GRACE 👏👏👏

user: WHY DIDNT WE GET Y/N ON HERE SOONER OMGGGGGG I LOVE THIS DUO SM

user: Sending love from Brazil! XX 🇧🇷🇧🇷❤️❤️

user: stop that’s so sad ☹️

user: she’s so real for the anxiety thing

LIVE CHAT !

user: i feel like i’m watching a tv show

user: “i don’t want to lose this again” and when i start sobbing????

user: ok but is the dick game good

user: HE SWIPED UP ON A COSTA TOASTIE ☠️

user: nah he’s down BAD me too but like 😭

user: he def would’ve thrown a temper tantrum if she didn’t respond

user: grace booing is so real i wanted a kissing in the rain screaming ‘i love you’ confession

user: her smile when she said she’s happy now man they’re literally my parents ☹️

user: Love you both X ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

user: ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

user: the world is healing

user: NAH MAN SWEAR THATS CHIPS BOICE COMING IN NOW

LIVE CHAT !

user: i’m actually gonna cry i missed them sm ☹️😭

user: the camera switching to her looking at him with heart eyes after calling him a bellend is so funny GET HER ASS 👏

user: chip is the new an*rew t*te 🙏

user: oh how i missed him calling her lady and missus

user: he’s the leader of the sassy man epidemic oh lord

user: OMG I FORGOT WHEN SHE YSED TO GO ON COFFEE DATES WITH HIS MUM

user: leave my girl and her spotify playlists alone

user: this has literally made my year

user: just in time for y/n’s fall vids

[tagged: savinggracepod , gkbarry_ , theburntchip]

❤️ liked by georgeclarkeey, georgebxggs, and 98,992 others

yourusername mum! mum! i made it! i’m on saving grace!!!!!! (and i figured i deserved at least one pic of chip from the launch x)

user that episode was the funniest thing ever i can’t even i nearly pissed myself when grace pretended to spank u with the paddle 😭😭😭

user mother ur so gorg i’m speechless

user you know the content is gonna slap when y/n l/n is there

user im so obsessed with u pls

user CAL AND CHIP AT THE FUNCTION SIR 👏🙇‍♀️

user best video in youtube history methinks

gkbarry_ loved having you on babe, even if the boss man gatecrashed 🫶❤️

yourusername he doesn’t like feeling left out smh

theburntchip oh alright then

max_balegde ICONIC!!!!!!

user MY ROMAN EMPIRE

user i hope you know that twt is in flames rn

user i gen teared up a bit when you talked about the breakup 🥹

user icons only

[tagged: ynapparel , nellarose , theburntchip]

❤️ liked by landonorris, behzinga and 97,872 others

yourusername self representing by wearing @ ynapparel the past (and every) week 😩🤭 featuring the love of my life & chip ig…

theburntchip wow alright

theburntchip i thought you were a g 😔

yourusername oops sorry babe

theburntchip we’re over smh

yourusername oh no… what a shame ☹️ anyway… hot girl winter!!!!!!

theburntchip the fits are fire though 😮‍💨

yourusername as always x

user EATING SLAYING DEVOURING

user OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

user forever obsessed with u

user graduated from cuntingtion university with an phd in slaying

nellarose love you bae x

calfreezy chip looking dashing as per usual

theburntchip aye thank you brotha

nellarose AYYYY LOOKING SEXY 🔥🔥🔥🔥

yourusername ALL YOU BABY 💋💋💋

ynapparel looking good and dressed to kill 😉😇🩷

user face card NEVER declines

lissiemackintosh this barbie is my mother

user ur so real lissie

faithlouisak doll 🤩

alice_hez 😍🔥🖤

user WHATS THE SQUARE ROOT OF 64?????

user angel girl 🤍

centralcee 😮‍💨🔥🔥🔥🔥

user NAHHH HES BRAVE COMMENTING ON THE POST W HER BOYFRIEND

user CENCH GET OUTTA HERE MAN

user SIRENSIRENSIREN Y/N BABY RUN!!!!!

user OH??????

user wait am i missing smth why are we freaking out

user @ user cench has always been lowk flirting with y/n, like she interviewed him at some event last yr and he was being so flirty and obviously she was giving him blank wall back BUT when her and chip broke up he got even WORSE like man was always in her comments tryna chat her up and she entertained it a lil but now the bitch is back and he’s bold

user NAH MAN GTFO WE JUST GOT CHIP BACK IN THE PICTURE WE CANT HAVE U RUINING THAT

theburntchip just posted to their story

[xiaq]

How did you and B meet?

I'm sure I've talked about this before, but here's the Official Story from our reception invitations:

Erica met B through their mutual friend G while rock climbing at the Austin greenbelt in April of 2019.

Erica had just purchased a new camera and 80% of the photos she took that day were of B. She shyly sent B the best ones and noted he was a lovely subject. B said, “thanks bro” and used those pictures for his Bumble profile.

It was an auspicious beginning.

At the time, B was living and working in Austin while Erica was a PhD student in Dallas. She often visited “home” to see her parents and climb, so they met up regularly over the next two years.

When the pandemic hit, Erica moved back to Austin to work on her dissertation, and isolated with a small group of climbers that included B. They also started playing D&D together.

Erica’s character was a chaotic neutral half-elf bard who cast spells and cantrips exclusively via limerick. Her go-to solutions to problems they encountered were seduction, inciting political rebellion, befriending monsters, and stabbing.

B played a lawful good half-elf paladin who found Erica’s character extremely vexing.

In real life, however, they had quite a bit in common, and started spending time alone outside of group climbing and D&D meetups. Later, they would discover they had a mutual romantic interest at this point, but neither acted on it since Erica had accepted a visiting professorship in Colorado. She moved in July.

When Erica returned briefly to Austin over spring break the following year, she spent most of her time with B: climbing, hiking, grilling at her parent’s place, and staunchly denying there was anything happening between them even if she wished there was because honestly, mom, he's never shown the slightest bit of interest in me (her father scoffed loudly from the other room).

She decided to move back to Austin at the end of the school year. When B (and G) came to visit her a few weeks before she moved, Erica decided to be brave and make her intentions known. While watching a UFC fight with B on the couch, she tucked her toes, lasciviously, under B’s thigh.

Shockingly, he did not respond to this unequivocal romantic overture. But he did help her remove all the temporary wallpaper on her ugly rental cabinets before they left, so that was nice.

The following month, when Erica moved back to Austin, B asked if she’d like to come over for dinner after climbing. She agreed because she wanted to procrastinate unpacking and also she was slightly in love with him. The following day, he asked if she wanted to have dinner again. She did.

“Wow,” Erica said to her mother that morning, “I guess B is really lonely since G moved. He’s been asking me to hang out with him a lot.”

“You're an idiot,” her mother said.

That night, B asked Erica if she'd ever thought about them dating.

“I’m thinking about it now,” she said, cavalier, suave, blasé, and not nervous at all.

This wasn’t a lie, but she had also thought about it once or twice prior to that moment as well.

“Great,” B said, “How would you feel if I kissed you?”

And Erica said, “Yeah, I’d feel pretty good about that.”

A few weeks later, B casually showed Erica an empty shelf in his bathroom cabinet and an inviting space in his closet and a couple spare drawers in his dresser and she, equally casually, moved in with him.

Over the next year, the apartment’s decor and Erica’s diet improved drastically. They traveled, they climbed, they spent time with each others families. They lived, laughed, loved and reduced, reused, recycled. Shortly after moving into their new house, combining bank accounts, making each other their medical powers of attorney, solidifying their retirement plans, and discussing whether getting married would have tax benefits, they realized most people got engaged before doing…a good portion of those things. So they planned to propose to each other.

Christmas of 2022, they took a road trip across Colorado. B proposed to Erica on the gondola in Telluride; two days later, Erica proposed to B on the Train to Cascade Canyon in Durango. They both said yes.

In August 2023 they will elope, with their dog Deacon as a witness, to Mt. Rainier national park.

In November 2023, they’ll celebrate with their friends and family at a backyard reception that will include food, drinks, swimming, croquet, corn hole, axe-throwing and a bounce house (the axe-throwing and the bounce-house will be on opposite sides of the lawn; if it's cold, the pool will be heated). They hope you’ll come and share their joy with them.

[eyeofnewtblog]

Things that happen at home:

So, my mom had her first symphony concert this weekend, and I’m happy to report that it was a smashing success.

What I personally thought was really cool is that the whole symphony is mostly older women. Most of the brass section was older men though, and you could tell that the trumpet and trombone players were having a great time with the music (lots of jamming out head and shoulders movement) and WOW that tuba player has A Set Of Lungs.

Honestly kinda makes me miss the days when Middle Sister would stand just outside my bedroom door and just BLAST through her practice session as fast as possible. Yes, she was a tuba player. Yes, she was in marching band and orchestra. Yes, I absolutely ran out screaming “MOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!” Every. Single. Time. No, that did not stop her in anyway whatsoever.

Anyway, there was also a cello soloist that performed with violin and viola accompaniment, and he was legitimately fantastic. I told my mom during intermission that she was better and she did her scrunch up face of You’re Full Of Shit But I Like The Support which was cute.

I was sitting next to my one of my cousins for the concert and we both kept side eyeing each other and giggling about how he was bobbing along and jamming out…for those of you that don’t know, it’s very easy to jam out and look cool when you have either a very small instrument or a very large instrument.

When you have a medium instrument, like a cello or French horn, you just look silly if you’re jamming out (saxophone is the exception) and my mom has this very…contained way of playing that looks intense but graceful and determined. So to see someone looking like they’re jamming out on an electric guitar while playing a cello was just…hilarious to us, because we’ve been watching my mom jam out for decades and never seen anyone look so goofy while sounding so good.

One of my moms work friends showed up, and she was an absolute delight. Complete sweetheart; it’s also really fucking funny to tease government contractors about their top secret clearances and joke about their projects or basically anything that they aren’t allowed to talk about. (I teased her specifically about being in the CIA because she does intelligence analysis; my husband and I have a long standing “argument” about if my mom works on quantum computers or making targeted ai satellite systems talk to each other, because honestly her PhD could easily allow for both) the goal is to make relatively small jokes and then drop it quickly because you don’t actually want them to violate their security protocols…but fucking hell if it isn’t fun to toe the line.

My mechanic husband had the dubious joy of teaching me how to jump start a car in the parking lot without jumper cables. (My car battery is in the fritz and needs replacement but we honestly thought it could wait another month or so…)

But basically you put the car in neutral, push it into a position that it can roll naturally downhill, then put it in either first gear or reverse (which ever way is down hill, basically) and release the clutch. I’m pretty sure this only works on automatic transmission vehicles, but I could be wrong and didn’t ask for clarification.

I’d like to point out that we were in a crowded parking lot with a perfectly functioning set of jumper cables. We could have absolutely asked any of the ten people walking by if we could get a jump. We could have waited for my cousin to come out, because we were parked right next to each other. But no. “What if you’re stuck by yourself? You pride yourself on being able to get out of anything.”

That man knows me too well.

Overall, great night. Fantastic concert, great learning experience, got to be an absolute little shit. 10/10, would do again.

[recurring-polynya]

My Top 5 Bleach Filler Characters, Appropos of Nothing

5. Inaba Kagerouza, Reigai Arc

Inaba is, simply put, the pinnacle of Soul Society worldbuilding. He's got this long dramatic backstory and a bunch of rage bottled up in his chest, but also a guy needs a paycheck, so he's just been doing the R&D grind for a hundred years. He knows a shit-ton about the Dangai, which is relevant to his evil scheme, but it's also just his day job (also the Dangai owns, I want a PhD in "the Dangai"). No one else in Squad 12 seems to have the least bit of beef with him, even after he builds an evil duplicate of every person in the Gotei. Unlike a lot of mad scientist characters, he's good with his weapon. Maybe he's weirdly jacked under his villainous smock?? Also, his evil scheme was generally well thought out, and took into account the fact that the Gotei is a bunch of buffoons. ngl, I kinda wish his plan had succeeded, if only for the fact that it would probably really piss Aizen off.

4. Ran'Tao, Bount Arc

Everything about Ran'Tao owns, including:

Sexy glasses

Condemned so hard by the Central 46 that they gave her a kidou seal back tattoo

KIDOU. SHOTGUN.

Stabbed Kariya in the gut

Noped out at the end of the arc because Who Needs the Gotei's Shit?

3. Kuchiki Kouga, Zanpakutou Rebellion Arc I think that when you hear the story about how Byakuya was forbidden from marrying Hisana because she was a commoner, you're supposed to feel this great sense of injustice, like wow! Byakuya actually showed character by standing up for his love! And that's great and all, and then you get the Zanpakutou Rebellion Vintage Kuchiki Bullshit Flashbacks and it's like, oh, the last guy they married into the clan mass murdered a bunch of people and then they had to seal him up in a cave and I feel like that's an important piece of context in the entire Kuchiki Family-Being-a-Bitch-About-Who-Byakuya-Marries debacle.

Which isn't to exonerate the Kuchiki, here! It's very clear that Kouga wasn't that bad before he got pushed over the brink by Kuchiki family machinations. I mean, this is very much an Everyone's The Asshole situation.

I love the fact that they never come out and say that Kouga is Byakuya's uncle, but he's very obviously Byakuya's uncle.

I love the fact that he dramatically cut his kenseikan off with his sword and threw them at Ginrei and they made a gree card of it.

I love that he appears to be exactly Renji's height and has one chunk of hair that is the same color as Renji's and he over-accessorizes horrifically, and at best the Squad Six old-timer's had to be like "Byakuya don't do this to us again" when he hired Renji, and at worst there's a chance that Renji the secret baby that was born after Kouga was banished and he was hidden away in the Rukon so he didn't screw up the succession line but he's actually the true Heir to the Kuchiki.

2. Harugasaki Seizo, standalone episode 313 This dude had a homoerotic rivalry with Ikkaku (doomed, of course, because who could compete with Yumichika?), lost his shinigami powers when he took a blow meant for Ikkaku, and then spent the next hundred years putting his entire pussy into doing laundry for Squad 11. This man invented yearning, even if he did choose the worst possible person in the history of ever as the target of his affection.

1. Amagai Shuusuke, New Captain Shuusuke Amagai Arc He looks like Ross Poldark. He can't hold his liquor. No one knows who witnessed his Captain's Exam. Ukitake and Kyouraku tried to talk him into a threesome. He was nice to Kira. His bankai was a tuba that made a foghorn noise when it belched out fire. His dad was the shinigami equivalent of a narc, who got done dirty by the Captain-Commander. He fought the Dangai Cleaner and won. I love him more than anything.

Honorable Mention: Kenryuu and Enryuu, New Captain Shuusuke Amagai Arc Because they are an important reminder that for all the shinigami buffoonery I am forced to witness, day in and day out, some people graduate from Shin'ou, get shikai even, and still can't get hired by the Gotei.

[tanith-rhea]

I'm not sure if this is has been done or not, but Larissa with a Normie (gn) s/o who is very introverted (the complete opposite of Larissa quite honestly) loves books and what not, but the main point is they don't like their own birthday, especially surprise parties. And poor Larissa doesn't know that about her s/o, because s/o never said anything about the situation or even hinted about they wanted on their birthday (even previous ones). If s/o had a choice, they wouldn't have told Larissa about their BD, Larissa just happened to stumble upon it somehow. But Larissa throws a grand surprise party for her s/o at the school and everyone, and I mean everyone was there. S/o doesn't want to ruin this for Larissa even though it is their day, so they try to stay with the party but gets anxiety and hides away somewhere. Someone eventually points out they aren't here and Larissa goes to finds s/o in their usual hiding spot, she just comforts and holds them and slowly understanding where s/o was feeling about the BD situation and deeply apologizes for this, but s/o told her it wasn't really her fault.

Happy birthday, my dear!

Hey, thank you for my first-ever ask! I hope I didn't forget anything and that you'll enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thank you so, so much for this. Have a lovely day!

Word count: <1k (this is a shorter one, but very sweet)

The days coming up to your birthday were always stressful. You had managed to keep your cool and act normal for most of it, but sometimes the need to be alone was encompassing. You knew it would all be over soon, and you would be a year older, and everything would be fine, but the sheer expectation of having something to show for it was too heavy to bear.

The thing was: you didn't accomplish much in your life. Sure, you were the first doctorated child in your family, but a PhD didn't make you fun at parties. You taught super-powered teenagers the importance of literature and were surprisingly adored by the little hormone-filled humans, but they weren't the posh politicians or CEOs your parents envisioned you spending time with.

You were proud of your achievements, they just didn't seem like achievements most of the time and especially during this time of year.

When the day came and no one acted differently, you could kiss every single person that passed through you. Nobody knew, of course, apart from Larissa, who only discovered it because last year your mother called to offer congratulations and passive-aggressively pry on your life. Everything was good, and tomorrow you would be older, wiser, and a hundred per cent not stressed over a disaster party going wrong.

That was until one of your students, Yoko, went looking for you close to seven, claiming someone was looking for you in the entry hall. You knew what it was about, and walking through the corridors to the unlit stairs the nausea of having to talk to people without previous preparation began to clog your throat.

"SURPRISE!" everyone screamed at you when the lights turned on. Oh wow, they weren't even close to what you thought they'd be. The entire school was crowding the spacious hall, a long dinner table had been brought and all types of party snacks decorated it along with an enormous cake saying "Happy Birthday, y/n"

Through the crowd, the culprit of that anxiety-inducing nightmare came to you with open arms and the warmest smile you had ever seen her wear. Larissa hugged you tightly, the proximity easing the knot in your gut by an inch.

"Happy birthday, my love," she said before kissing your cheeks and lips "I hope you liked the surprise."

"Yeah, of course!" your half-strangled high-pitched voice rang in your ears. You were going to pass out, there was no denying it.

A lot of students went to you with birthday wishes and handmade cards, and it was overwhelmingly sweet of them, but all you wanted to do was bolt.

Your colleagues were there as well; every single one shook your hand or hugged you or gave you an awkward but well-meaning pat on the back. Everyone seemed weirdly happy to celebrate one more year of y/n y/ln being alive and it was too much.

You talked with the biggest amount possible of people you knew and endured stale chitchat with the ones that you never saw before but, half an hour in, you could not do it anymore. You waited until no one was paying attention and ran like mad to your safe haven, leaving the blasted function behind.

It took more than you felt comfortable analysing for someone to come looking for you. It was nearly an hour, and you were sleepily going over some poems in a random book you picked by the window when Larissa's soft voice caught your attention.

"Love? What are you doing here?" she was concerned, her bright eyes widening at your own, glossed over with tears you didn't have the energy to shed.

"I was just a bit overwhelmed" you offered simply. Should you explain? You probably should, but you felt too tired to even speak too much.

Larissa quickly joined you at the library seat, taking you in her arms and kissing the top of your head. That had to be the best thing about her: she gave the best cuddles known to men.

"I didn't know you'd feel uncomfortable. I'm so sorry, darling" she whispered atop of you.

"You couldn't know… I never told you" you said weakly against her chest.

"Told me what?"

"That I hate it. All of it," she lifted your face and looked at you questioningly "I hate my birthday. I hate the expectations of having something to show, the fear the friends I invite don't actually want to come, having to talk with my family just to hear how everybody else is excelling at life while I barely can get sixteen-year-olds to read eight books a year, it just-"

"Shhh, love" she touched your lips with her thumb, her hand cupping your cheek and a sad smile. She traced her pad over your bottom lip and leaned to kiss your forehead "I am so, so very sorry for not asking how you felt. I swear I'd never have done any of it if I knew"

You know this. You know she had nothing but the best intentions and while it touched you how far she could go to make you happy, it also meant your undoing.

"It wasn't your fault" you turn to kiss the palm of her hand, pressing it against your mouth with your fingers before leaning on her again "If I had told you it never would have happened."

She held you close and played with your hair, the sounds from the party were slowly subsiding and you could hear people walking the corridors and talking. Probably students going back to their rooms.

After some time, you too wandered to your quarters.

That night you played Scrabble in bed while eating coffee-and-chocolate-flavoured cake and Larissa held you close until you fell asleep, whispering sweet nothings into your ear.

[elifinchsart]

saw a post about tboys swamp posting for clout and stealing valor of the real swamp aficionados (silly post not an actual issue, op was drunk) and was discussing with my partner about if tillman would be a swamp posting clout chaser and the conclusion is yes. he would be doing it to follow trends and look outdoorsy and also he doesn't want people to think he's grossed out by or scared of swamps because he thinks it isnt manly. it ends up with jaylen taking him to a swamp because she wants to look for bugs and fish. she thought he would like it and he didn't want to say no to her. and hes trying to be so brave for her but he is not. being brave. he is being whiny. still at no point does he make any effort to leave he just keeps following jaylen instead

part of the reason he doesnt say he doesn’t want to go to the swamp is bc he doesn’t want to admit he was lying to look cool but also he really does want to make jaylen happy. and he lasts maybe 10 minutes for her sake before complaining bc he does want her to have a good time but also something wet and slimy touches his foot AND IM GOING TO DIE JAYLEN!!!!!! jaaaaayleeeeen it smells so bad. jaaaaayleeeen can i use your moisturizer it smells good. jaylen that bug is scary why does it look like that? jaaaaaaylen im getting mud on my jorts. jaylen did you know there's poisons swamps in darks souls. im really good at dark souls. i can show you the games later they're pretty epic. oh noooo jaaay do you think this swamp is poisoning us. help you have to help me jaaaayleeeen its so hard to walk on the marsh. waaaaaaauh jay (<- tripped and fell over ass up) (crying still) thanks for helping me up jaylen youre so brave and swag. oooohhhh is that a crab wow the crab is sooooo cool jaylen the swamp is so cool. its called a mangrove crab? you’re so smart and awesome jaylen you should have like 3 phds. jaaaaayleeeen i stepped on something gross again i wanna go hoooome jaaaaylen

i hope you enjoyed this realistic simulation of being trapped in a swamp with tillman. thank you.

[angiesayshush]

Incorrect Quotes (ft. Welcome To The Table)

pt1 (?)

———————

New York: Anger issues? Who’s got anger issues? I don’t have anger issues! Maybe they have anger issues! I HAVE A PHD IN ANGER ISSUES AND I AM TELLING YOU RIGHT NOW-

———————

Delaware: Aw shit- We let em get away

New York: Woah woah- You’re “the leader”- that means you let him get away

Delaware: You’re not helping

New York: I’m not trying to help

———————

New Jersey: WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY FACE?

New York: Would you like the list alphabetically or descending order of grossness?

———————

Texas: GET AWAY GET AWAY GET AWAY

Florida: I hear a voice, but no way it’s Texas- it’s too high and whiny-

Texas: AAAAAAA

———————

New York: Uh, could you hang on a second? I just got a phone call here from someone named “I don’t gIVE A FLYING-”

———————

Florida: What’s the Manhattan Project?

New York: If we told you, we’d have to kill you-

Alright so the Manhattan Project is a research and-

Gov: New York-

———————

Arizona: She’s the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen…

New Mexico: *judgement* Isn’t she the only girl you’ve ever seen

———————

Texas: *cracking his knuckles* You don’t want this kind of pain, Florida

California: Big talk for someone with such a limited vocabulary, Tex

———————

New York: Split up to search in the dark for horrifying creatures… Could we pick a more cliche way for us to get eaten?

California: One of us could twist our ankle… or our phones could die… or

New York: *shoves California’s shoulder* Okay mOVE-

———————

Gov: Gentleman! And Florida-

———————

Oklahoma: Ugh… What hit me? It was like Texas… Only bigger and meaner… angrier… but not quite as ugly-

———————

watching a show and a scene where protagonist launches missile at an enemy comes on

Texas: *looks at California*

California: *looks at Texas*

Texas: Where did he get the bazooka?

California: I have theories… None of them pleasant-

———————

California: Wow… I’ve never seen anything like this… It’s using a metal alloy that I don’t even recognize

Texas: Gosh- A metal alloy even you don’t know about. It boggles the mind.

California: *annoyed* Dude- You wanna talk metal energy with me? Bring it.

Texas: I don’t.

[qqueenofhades]

Hi can you please hate on the corpse who used to be the queen of England some more? Thank you 😘💅💖

Aww come on. She's dead, she's buried, isn't it time to just be nice and show some respect and forget about old issues and just --

Whew, okay, close one. However, I will say that it was charitable of her to keel over at this exact moment and thus grind the entire economy and country to a halt. You can technically make the argument that this was a good thing, because as soon as business as usual resumed, Poundland Margaret Thatcher (aka new Prime Minister *shudder* Liz Truss) rolled in with her team of top Tory clowns and commenced wrecking, I mean absolutely smoking, the British economy. As a result of her genius efforts to cut taxes for the wealthiest earners and uh, not much else (seriously, WHEN will the "conservatives are better for the economy!!!" myth die in flames? They have one move and it is always terrible), the UK pound now looks like this:

Wow. Huh. That seems bad. This unmitigated economic clown show is going on, need I not remind you, in the grips of an unprecedented cost of living crisis, and the tabloids are already breaking out the Clown Nose of Shame for Chancellor Kwasi Kwarteng, less than one month into the job, which also seems bad. Every economic publication is likewise "this is a pile of nonsense and it's not gonna do shit." But you know, AT LEAST FREEDOM FROM THE EU TYRANNY OF A STABLE SINGLE MARKET HAS BEEN ACHIEVED!

So what I'm trying to say here is, let's not take our eye off the ball. It is absolutely fun to dunk on the royal family at all times, but while they were spending millions on having people stand in line for five miles to see a coffin in a large room, this utter nightmare of a government, evidently just to make everyone long for Boris Johnson or something, was busy preparing this absolute pile of stinky doo-doo crapsack shit. I mean, I have to pay my UK PhD student loans in sterling, so this helps with the dollar/pound conversion on my end, but also, my god when will the circus end, why are Labour (despite some incremental improvements) still so utterly uninspiring as a whole, and can someone please turn Truss off and then just like. Never turn her on again. Oy.

[gyllenhaalstories]

presumed innocent finale rewatch word vomit? yeah i think so <33

knowing who did it made it more obvious as i rewatched the entire season but especially with the finale. the way jaden looks so dissociated the entire time, how you can clearly tell she has not slept in ages and she's been eaten alive by this. the hugs with rusty... it's obvious. but wow i literally believed every single possibility except her. if i learned one thing from this show, it's that i am as stupid as rusty and that is deeply upsetting.

i haven't watched the movie (i want to though!) & the other productions, i haven't read the book so like... what the hell happens with rusty? i know the series is doing it differently so comparison is almost pointless. i guess maybe we might get crumbs about what happened to some of the people involved with season 2 although it's a new case and we don't know much about who comes back (i saw peter wasn't coming back as tommy, jake is likely to only be back as a producer). but what happens?

is rusty unemployed? he was suspended with pay i believe, but like, he's not going back there to work like it's a regular monday right? does he find a firm in chicago to work form, more lowkey? more paperwork, more like lawyer you call for contracts and minimal public exposure? does he change careers? does he just... live as a pariah for the rest of his life? what! does! he! do! i wonder. all we know is that he's incredibly dumb but he's law smart. he can throw a punch, he can swim and run on a treadmill. where the hell does that take him. he has no credibility, he might be excellent at his job (he said it himself that he doesn't know what it feels to lose a trial, not even his own... wow), but take the job out of the man and what is he left with? i just want to know. i'm so curious. i want all the details.

barbara had a suitcase packed. she basically had a foot out of the door before jaden explained what happened. does she stay and become even more miserable to protect her children? that stare they exchanged at the last second of the finale is so charged. do they get divorced? i hope so, perhaps after jaden moves out and kyle too if barbara can stand it that long. i hope they divorce, as fairly and smoothly as possible. it will inevitably create a great divide, i see jaden siding with her father and kyle with his mom. i think barbara's compulsion to forgive and to protect her family will be shattered and altered forever. i hope she finds someone who's artistic like her, who's loyal and who loves her the way she deserves. i hope she gets a proper art studio that never turns into a storage shed, perhaps she quits working for galleries and instead shows her art to the world. i see rusty attending the exhibition. how lovely aww <3

no but let's take a moment for barbara and rusty. they met when they were twenty, in college she studied art and he did law which is like so different. surprise pregnancy 6 months later. they still finished school. it's safe to assume kyle was born around that time. barbara going to school pregnant! rusty and barbara raising jaden and reading her bedtime stories in between important schoolwork! and after that they just... they just kept going. they had a kid at about 21, two before 25 and they had amazing careers after that. i know i know that's the life of many people i don't care let me be amazed by barbara and rusty for one moment thank you. their whole lives... all they know is each other. barbara mentioned clifton's phd in art so casually, does she have that too? two kids and a phd? and was an art gallery the future that barbara wanted? she's so talented. did she want to become an artist, was she an artist at some point but she diverged to work at a gallery for a seemingly more stable revenue? did she have to settle so rusty could aimed so high? i imagine he would have succeeded to raymond. in the next election, he would be taking his place. that's crazy!!! no wonder why they drifted apart.

the kids will be forever messed up oh my god. jaden? how is she supposed to move on from that. i wonder what the future has to offer to jaden and kyle.

raymond retires, absolutely wonderful. does he stay friends with rusty? i think he would, but i don't think lorraine would support it. and between lorraine and rusty, there is no doubt who he chooses considering who almost killed him during this trial.

so rusty has 0 mistress 0 best friend 0 wife and a broken family. he probably doesn't even have the house because i doubt he can afford it without a big fancy job as a big fancy chief deputy prosecutor and the big fancy paycheck that comes with it. he has nothing. he did not know what he was willing to lose. he's so dumb. he lost everything because he couldn't keep his pp in his pants... might be worse than actual jail for him. hmm, deserved.

WILL TOMMY'S CAT BE OKAY!!! I'M ASKING THE REAL QUESTION!

[rhubarbed-triangle]

Mayor Jay's (or Prefieto Jota's) Translated Tweets (as of Aug 6th)

(I know that twitter has an automatic translator, but it doesn't really work with the weird italicized text he writes with)

Here's his twitter profile pic and bio, which reads "17th elected mayor of the city of Valigma - Business School Grad '21, PhD in HR". The one person he follows is the Arkanis twitter account.

"From what I know from my studies about hiring new people, is that it's basically about giving them the best work attire. lololol"

He's a business major. What did we expect?

"Learning to use this tool, pardon me for the eventual errors. I continue to learn, but not with a machine lolollol."

A reasonable tweet for a political figure to make. Nothing weird here.

5:55pm (I just thought the time was weirdly specific) - He posts a snippet of a handwritten letter. "Dear, son. How are things for you? Yesterday, we went to your aunt's birthday, she misses you. You don't know what those guys did, yet. El..."

"Tomorrow, I will separate some immigration documents."

Gearing up for the player announcements

"I need specialists…"

"Wow, a lot of new people. Could they work 50 hours a week in the factory?"

"I hate to have to resolve problems involving the island. It's not even my jurisdiction."

And then he retweets the first player announcement of Meiaum, Bagi, Gabepeixe, Guaxinim, and Maethe, and also posts his police report from Jorge.

"I want more specialists for this week… Already, I have some names, lol."

"I want more! MORE PEOPLE!"

"The strangle of math caused the group to hug the famous swimmer with long arms, but they discovered that he was from the Asian continent." He then retweets the second player announcement of Choke, Matt, Felps, Pac, and Coreano. (I really have no context for that one, any thoughts?)

And then Pac goes live (Aug 6th) to talk about the project and the player announcement. "Just because you were confirmed [to be in Arkanis], are you stalking me, Pac?"

"Just because you have confirmed, are you stalking me, Pac?"

"I am in a meeting now, I can't attend. Leave your message with my secretary (in English)." (I think this one was to make sure that people could now translate the tweets with twitter's auto translator bc he stops talking in the cursive script)

"I bought things for my specialists, tomorrow I will show you in detail. Good night. Yes, good night thgin doog [good night backwards]"

"I'll tell you something that I didn't tell you before bed: all of the specialists that we call have something important to them. But, firstly, we like people that make us feel good to be around."

And then he posts a picture of a partially-lit minecraft cave with the masks with bright-red eyes glowing in the dark. Definitely not ominous at all...

[cwritesforfun]

(Criminal Minds) Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader: Lunch Date

Based on 1st Season Spencer Reid Spencer met Y/N at a bookstore. He asked her out and his date is tomorrow.  Got facts Spencer will day from these websites - Wikipedia, PubMed, Journal of Sleep Research, and college grad program website **I don't own these characters except for Y/N and the waiter, Alex** **Y/N = Your Name**

Master list

Spencer's POV

We just got back to Quantico from our last case in Florida.

I pack up my things to go home and Morgan walks over. He asks "Doing anything this weekend?" I answer "Reading Lord Of The Rings, a date, and catching up on my soap shows." Morgan nods and then his jaw drops. He asks "A date? Damn with who pretty boy?" I laugh and answer "A girl from a bookstore." He replies "Don't do anything I would do. Actually scratch that man, do what I would do. Enjoy yourself." Garcia stops by and asks "Enjoy himself? Hey, remember when Reid did his physics magic and it exploded at Hotchner's feet? He was enjoying himself then." We all laugh. Morgan says "He's going on a date." Garcia smiles and hugs me. She says "Omg I can't believe it. Tell me everything." I reply "There's really not much to tell. She was in the fantasy genre section of the bookstore on 5th Street named BooksAMillion. It was actually row 16. I was browsing nearby and I thought she looked pretty. I walked over and we talked about books for a little bit before I asked her out. The bookstore worker wasn't happy about us talking semi-loudly, but I could tell she likes to see a relationship blossom at her store. She let it pass. That's it." Garcia laughs and replies "Of course, you met her at a bookstore and remember exactly where you met. Please invite me to the wedding and the proposal you should have there." I reply "Garcia, I haven't even gone out with her yet." She laughs and replies “You always know when it’s the one.”

Y/N's POV - Next Day!

I'm meeting Dr. Spencer Reid for our date tonight. He's literally the same age as me and has multiple PHD’s. I feel so unaccomplished. It's fine though. After getting a double Master's, I was done with school.

We're going to lunch at some random place he picked then we planned on picking a book out for each other at the bookstore we met at. I think it'll be cute. I'm very excited.

I arrive at the lunch place on time and see Dr. Reid sitting on the bench outside. He sees me, waves, and stands. I walk up and exclaim "Hi Dr. Reid! How are you doing today?" He replies "Please call me Spencer. I've had a good day so far. I finished rereading the entire Lord of the Rings Trilogy and started rewatching episodes of my soaps."

We head inside the restaurant and we take a seat at an empty table.

I ask "Finish the trilogy again? Wait did you read all 3 today or just the last one?" He answers "All 3. I can read 20,000 words per minute." I reply "Damn I wish I was you. That would've made school so much easier." He replies "Not for me. I was bullied in school. I reply “I’m sorry to hear that. I’m glad you made it out in one piece.” He smiles and says “Yeah, I made it out one piece physically. My reading speed did help with my 3 BAs and 3 PHDs that my bullies don’t have." I smile and reply "Wow what a flex. I was wondering why you were called a Doctor. Personally, I only got two Master's and then I was done with school." He replies "More than 16 million people have a Master's in the U.S. That is roughly 8% of the population. Did you know that the amount of students in college now who are pursuing their Master's is higher than in the past decade?" I answer "That's so interesting. Huh well, I think it personally helped me get the job I have, which is good."

A waiter walks up and exclaims "Sorry to keep you waiting. I'm Alex. I'll be your server this afternoon. What can I get for both of you to drink?" We both tell him our drink orders then he swiftly returns with drinks. We tell him our food order and he leaves.

I ask "Have you ever been here before?" He shakes his head and answers "My friend, Morgan, told me about it. He goes on a lot of dates. It seemed to have a good selection from the menu, so I'm glad he suggested it." I smile and nod. He asks "Any plans for the rest of the weekend?" I answer "Get some sleep tonight to be ready for the week and maybe bake some kind of bread to eat for breakfast this week." He replies "Oh... According to PubMed, people don't just adjust to a routinely disparate weekday and weekend sleep schedule. You think you do, but you don't. Not to mention, the Journal of Sleep Research says we get about 30 minutes less sleep than we would ideally need on each night of the working week... sorry I got a little carried away there." I smile and reply "No problem at all. It's super interesting. Did any of those articles ever say what to do instead? Because if you aren't catching up with your sleep, then what? He answers "Mainly it said to keep a normal sleep schedule and not to change anything." I reply "Is that cool? Yes. Will I try it? Maybe not. I love not having a healthy sleeping pattern." He laughs.

Food arrives and we eat.

After lunch, we walk down the street to BooksAMillion for the next part of our date.

I ask "So do we have a time limit or book limit or price limit or anything?" He asks "Do you have an idea of what you want to get already?" I nod. He says "Ok so do I. We can do 15 minutes and a 2-book limit." I reply "Deal!"

We separate and I start walking to fantasy. He seems like a Star Trek & adventure-loving guy, so time for my first book. I grab my first book and then head to the nonfiction section for my second one. I pick it up and head to the checkout line. I wait in it and checkout.

As I walk towards the exit, I see Spencer by the entrance holding a bag plus two cups. He hands me one and says "I got you a coffee. You seem like a two-sugar and half-n-half girl to me. I hope you don't mind and I hope I got your order right." I reply "Omg wow yes that is my order. Thanks, Spencer. Shall we?" I motion to the door and he nods.

We leave and head to the park across the street. We sit on a bench and I ask "Who first?" He answers "You seem excited. You start." I smile and say "Ok... here ya go. I shall explain why as soon as you see them." I hand him the bag and he sets his coffee down. He takes the bag and opens it. He pulls out the first one. I exclaim "Ok so my first one. Now based on our one conversation from last time, you gave me Trekkie vibes like you just seem like Star Trek would be your thing. Am I right?" He nods and I continue "Awesomeness wow! So my first one is Spinning Silver by Naomi Novik gives me very much Kathryn Janeway vibes. Ooh I hate that I've said vibes twice in the span of 5 minutes. Ew. Sorry ok so... Kathryn was the first Federation captain to successfully traverse the Delta Quadrant, encountering dozens of new planets and civilizations over the course of seven years. Then in the book, the plot revolves around three amazing women and a stubborn resistance to cultural norms. Have you read it before?" He shakes his head and replies "No I can't say I have. Nice call on Star Trek. So now book 2!" He pulls it out and I exclaim "Ahh ok so book two is The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch. I recommend it to so many people because I think there's something in there that will resonate with everybody. It makes you believe in yourself and not feel so uninspired by work. I don't even know if you feel that way, but it's helped me and I thought hey why not?" He replies "Well thank you. I'm sure I'll like it. I'm excited to read them." I smile.

I set my coffee down and he hands me my bag. He picks his coffee back up, sips it, then exclaims "So the first one is a classic, so I really hope you haven't read it yet. The Once And Future King by T.H. White is a retelling of King Arthur and his life. The book is divided into four parts, which are The Sword in the Stone detailing the youth of Arthur. Then, The Queen of Air and Darkness was published separately in a somewhat different form as The Witch in the Wood. Next is The Ill-Made Knight (1940), dealing mainly with the character of Lancelot. Lastly is The Candle in the Wind. I hope you like it as much as I do. My second book is quite the craze among people at the moment. It is The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. It was originally written in Portuguese, but I picked the English version for you. It follows a young Andalusian shepherd on his journey to the pyramids of Egypt, after having a recurring dream of finding a treasure there. I hope you like them." I smile and reply "I'm excited to read them. Thank you so much, Spencer." His phone rings and he says "Oh... one minute." He walks off with his phone.

Spencer shortly returns and says "This was a fun date. Thank you for coming. I hope we can do this again. Unfortunately, I have to head to work." I reply "Aww yeah I had fun too. This was a great date! Well, I guess I'll see ya Spencer!" He grabs his bag and coffee then he leans forward to kiss me on the cheek. He says "Bye Y/N." I wave bye and he walks off.

I head home right after to start reading my books.

Spencer's POV

On the jet, I pull out my books and set them on the table. Morgan asks "You got new books? What about that date? Did you miss it?" I answer "No. In fact, she picked these books out for me. One was because she guessed I was a Star Trek fan and one was to inspire me plus it's one of her favorite books. I gave her The Once And Future King plus The Alchemist." He laughs and replies "Nerds. Geez. So you had fun?" I answer "Technically fun is enjoyment, amusement, or lighthearted pleasure. I have fun all the time. If you mean, do I think we'll go on another date? I kissed her on the cheek and she let me ramble. I'd say yes." He laughs.

........................................................................... THANK YOU FOR READING!!!! :)

[dragonmuse]

Well, while you're on a roll... Charlie? Less populated, but greater distribution! Would all of them perform an intervention on May Be Bad and Wake Myself, or would some of them be jealous and want a tell all?

I think we really only have three Charlies, right? *checks notes* Four, he does show up in She Says Love, so we'll make it an even battle.

Pool side, plastic chairs settled in a too close circle. Arrayed behind Mainverse is the suggestion of a dozen other chairs, other Charlies who never make it on screen, but may live in shades between these four.

There is a definite two on two air to the whole thing.

Mainverse *has the agenda*: So.

She Says Love: Can we just put it on the table? Because those two do not look like us.

Mainverse: Yeah, okay, what the hell is up with this?

Mainverse and She Says Love are dressed in distinctly relaxed clothing. Loose shorts, worn t-shirts. Wake Myself and May Be Bad are in tailored, expensive looks with a lot more care taken with their still close cut hair. Maybe Be Bad is in gray, Wake Myself is in deep jewel tones and has on a hint of eyeliner.

May Be Bad: *heavy judgement* I think we just have taste.

Wake Myself: We haven't been in college for four years, what is with the look?

Mainverse: It's comfortable.

Wake Myself: It's embarrassing, is what it is. Unless that's Iz's shirt. I do like to steal those.

May Be Bad: ....that's an option? Got to get on that.

She Says Love: Why would you be stealing Izzy's clothes? He's like six inches shorter than us.

Wake Myself: Husband privileges.

The other three go silent.

Wake Myself: What?

Mainverse: You...you're married to Izzy?

Wake Myself: You're not?

May Be Bad: I'm pretty sure Lucius would make my balls into a necklace, holy shit dude. *holds up hand for a high five which Wake Myself confusingly gives him*

Wake Myself: I mean, angel likes to hang with us?

Mainverse: ANGEL?! I'm going to hyperventilate.

May Be Bad: Angel is....ironic, I'm guessing? Or are we talking old school shock and awe kind of angel. Lucifer maybe.

Wake Myself: No? Izzy just calls me demon, so we call Luc angel cause he's sweeter than us?

May Be Bad: *slumps back in chair* that's....what the fuck are WE like that Lucius is the angel?

Wake Myself: Just a horny post-doc.

Mainverse: I mean same, but I didn't marry my childhood crush that's like thirty years older than me.

Wake Myself: Twenty.

Mainverse: *checks paper* Huh. okay. STILL

May Be Bad: Oh, if you don't like that you're gonna HATE me. *giggles*

The other three turn to him, observing this laugh and then give each other concerned looks.

Mainverse: oookay, who didn't make it into therapy?

May Be Bad: Why would we do therapy?

She Says Love: hoooo boy.

Mainverse: The sad empty void and the occasional bursts of rage? Those don't alarm you ever?

May Be Bad: That's just normal.

Wake Myself: Ooooh wow. Dude. Dude.

She Says Love: Doesn't it make it hard to function?

May Be Bad: Hell no. I'm motivated. Gotta make sure Jim and Luc have everything thing they need.

Mainverse: Jim?

May Be Bad: Uh huh. Sometimes Jim more than Luc honestly. Luc is technically harder to please, but Jim gives harder critique.

She Says Love: You are...not in a phd program, are you? Like Luc and Jim aren't some bizzaro world advisers?

May Be Bad: I'm in security consulting. *sharp grin*

Mainverse: Oh shit.

Wake Myself: Are we a criminal? Like a real one? I mean I break laws sometimes, but I'm not in the mob!

May Be Bad: It's not the mob. It's a business.

Mainverse: ....it's totally the mob.

She Says Love: So mobby. Does Dad know? He'd flip a shit.

May Be Bad: He's dead.

Wake Myself: Huh. I mean that's one way to resolve the Daddy issues. It's clean.

Mainverse: *visibly upset alon with She Says Love* what? What happened?

May Be Bad: *shifty* I don't know. He just disappeared or whatever when I was like nine.

Mainverse: Oh fuck, Eddy must be devastated.

May Be Bad:....never met them? Was that the person Dad was gonna hook up with before they bounced on him?

She Says Love: oooh I hate all of this. What the fuck?

Mainverse: Okay, okay, so obviously we can see where your shit jumped the tracks. And you, *gestures at Wake Myself* are just all wrong age wise. But uh... I guess I have one question.

Wake Myself: He's amazing in bed.

May Be Bad: Yeah, I get my spine melted on the reg. And don't get started on Luc.

Wake Myself: Two of them together?

*they make knowing eye contact*

Mainverse: ...I so badly want to be grossed out by this. But I kind of just want to know.

She Says Love: Same.

*so this all devolves into extremely pornographic descriptions, so they don't have to address the fact that May Be Bad is clearly completely morally comprimised. Charlies being excellent at repression manage this entirely. They all wake up horny, but also kind of sad.*

[thatscarletflycatcher]

I posted 8,670 times in 2022

785 posts created (9%)

7,885 posts reblogged (91%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@rorylgilmore

@thisgirlshouldbeworking

@cardgameengineer

@fictionadventurer

@withlovemuffin

I tagged 5,589 of my posts in 2022

Only 36% of my posts had no tags

#jane austen - 730 posts

#dracula daily - 566 posts

#lotr - 301 posts

#elizabeth gaskell - 253 posts

#stuff of dreams - 244 posts

#little women - 243 posts

#tumblr - 212 posts

#persuasion - 184 posts

#north and south - 166 posts

#art - 157 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#there's about a 50/50 chance that you'll kill someone for a book. you're never in the spotlight but let's be honest you're doing all the wor

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Persuasion is, between Austen novels, the one easiest to place in time, as it is firmly set in the context of the Napoleonic Wars. So the Netflix Persuasion making Lady Russell a sex tourist implies she travels to WAR TORN EUROPE to get her boytoys which... wow.

501 notes - Posted July 15, 2022

#4

90s period dramas: what if you could travel in time and see these people in their lived-in but visually nice settings and clothing? What if the story came to life on the screen?

2000s period dramas: but what if those were also colorful and dynamic and filled with a contemporary sense of rhythm and emotivity?

2010s period dramas: but what if they were all grimy and SERIOUS... or also just the stylization of illustration and its unbelievable primness brought to life?

2020s period dramas: but what if they were really about us and OUR time and OUR fashion and OUR way of speaking, and OUR values and mores because we are the most important prettiest most intelligent humans to ever exist so why even try and engage with all that barbaric inferiority and otherness?

582 notes - Posted September 18, 2022

#3

Not gonna lie, I heard you all talking so much about a cowboy showing up since the beginning that somehow I expected Quincy Morris to show up out of nowhere to Dracula's castle and rescue Jonathan western style, and I'm a bit disappointed.

812 notes - Posted May 24, 2022

#2

If you don't like

- period manners

- period fashion

- period language

THEN WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU MAKE A PERIOD DRAMA????

5,219 notes - Posted June 14, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

“average person has a PhD” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person has 0 PhDs. Abraham Van Helsing, who speaks broken English & has 100 PhDs, is an outlier adn should not have been counted”

6,984 notes - Posted September 2, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[gothprentiss]

i've always found it weird when tv shows insist on having characters who are just several degrees smarter than the show's baseline level. like the "i have six phds in various fields none of them honorary" thing tv shows do is funny on its face but the kind of 'intelligence' that length of time in academia produces isn't the Epic Dunkathon that these shows typically use to show intelligence. not that realism is necessary here— we’re all in on the trope, we all know that this is effectively the same kind of spurious numbers game as providing a character’s IQ— but at a certain point this does just show unbelievable laziness when it comes to characterization. if you tell me a character is smart i will register that as a fact about them in the universe which no amount of lazy research will jostle from my mind but this is just writing a caliber or two lower than any show or movie or other medium where i get to be like “whoa! that’s smart” as opposed to watching a Smart Character at work and being like “wow the writer did not even do a cursory google search”

this was a big problem for criminal minds w both reid and his mother, bc he’s supposed to be an unbelievable genius but mostly just knows relevant statistics, and she’s supposed to be a medieval literature professor but turns up her nose at a book of the minor poems of margery kempe (who is only famous because she wrote only one thing, which was a prose autobiography). and i always thought it would be funny to take the various inconsistencies within the show at face value and to write a sort of catch me if you can style thing where reid has effectively scammed his way into the fbi by totally fabricating his background which is why he says things like “vernacular” when the word is “idiolect”, etc., and so he is just there waiting for the other shoe to drop, but probably won’t because pedantry isn’t one of my major drives. it’s there though! those writers don’t know dick about shit