#and that was when i was 18-20 like when its okay if you dont really have anything major to share about your life

[undyinglantern]

being closer to your 30s than 20s and having nothing to show for it is so

[hier--soir]

whole new can of worms

joel miller x f!reader

rating: explicit, 18+ mdni summary: two friends decide to blow off a little steam together. warnings/tags: [18+ minors DNI] fwb!joel, famous HOG joel miller lmao, age gap [20 years], language, alcohol consumption, established friendship, guitar playing joel!!, oral [f and m recieving], p in v sex, starts slow and careful and ends up rough oops. word count: 6.9k (nice) series masterlist | masterlist a/n: okay LOOK. i’m working on a final part to this little impromptu series, but I got very side-tracked with the idea of a prequel and then the most smut I’ve ever written just fucking spilled out of me. this is the first time they had sex, ladies and gentlemen. you get the beginning before you get the end. enjoy. also, this moment from tlou pt 2 game is what i was picturing for the beginning when joel is playing the song. dont watch if you don't want to, its from a cut scene very late in the second game. zero spoilers, just joel miller strumming that damn guitar in a way i'll never forget. this is part one of my fwb!joel series. you can find the other parts here: two, three, four.

“Play that one I like.”

Joel offered no verbal response, but sat up straighter in his chair, fingers adjusting along the fretboard of his guitar. You relaxed into your seat, closing your eyes and taking a long sip from your glass of amber liquor.

He began playing and you smiled happily, goosebumps breaking out across your skin as the familiar tune filled the air between you and your friend, melding with the sound of rain softly pattering against the roof of his veranda. You kicked your feet up onto the table between you, the tense muscles in your legs aching from the stretch.

“Get your feet off the table,” Joel muttered, fingers never ceasing on the instrument. “Animal.”

Your eyes stayed closed, but you stuck your tongue out in his direction, smirking a little and keeping your feet up, knowing he didn’t really mind.   

Both of you had endured a long fucking day.

Winter was fading into Spring, and the trees and plants in Jackson were slowly but surely beginning to bloom again. It meant you were spending more hours in the green house than out on patrol, and you weren’t complaining. Tending to the garden relaxed you, connected you to nature and to one of the food sources in the commune that helped put a little bit of food on everyone’s plate each week. Working there made you feel connected to the town, and you loved it, truly. Except, for when a thunderstorm happened.

They’d scared you for as long as you could remember. Since you were a kid, thunder and lightning had made you want to crawl under the covers on your bed and hide away until the loud noises disappeared. But as a full-grown woman, you weren’t afforded such luxuries. Rain, hail or shine, the people in Jackson depended on each other, and you couldn’t duck out of a shift because of a silly little phobia.

When the rain started pouring down on the glass roof of the greenhouse you hadn’t been surprised. Only a few weeks into springtime, the town was still shaking off the remnants of a bitterly cold winter, and a little rain was still common. It was only when the first crack of thunder sounded that you’d stilled, hands frozen gripping a heavy pot, an unwelcome shiver racing down your spine. You’d had to work for hours, the sound of rain pelting against the roof accompanying you, with flashes of lightning appearing out of the corner of your eye all day.

When all was said and done, you’d trudged through the downpour to Joel’s house and arrived on his doorstep looking like a drowned rat, only to find out that he’d spent his afternoon stuck outside on patrol, in the very weather you were so upset about.

He’d opened the door with damp hair, bundled in warm clothes, the tip of his nose a light shade of pink from the cold.

“Whiskey?” he’d asked.

You nodded. “Whiskey.”

And so the pair of you had ended up on his porch, under cover from the residual spit of rain, forgetting all about the shit day through good company and good alcohol.

As Joel strummed the last few chords of the song you sighed glumly, cracking an eye open to watch him. He set the guitar down gently and reached for his glass.

“So beautiful,” you murmured. “Wish I could play.”

“And then what use would I be?” he chuckled. “Can’t have you learning guitar; I’d have no one to play for anymore.”

You watched him closely. Staring into his glass, you could see him mulling the words over in his head. Ellie had hardly spoken a word to him in weeks, and you could see the toll it was taking, although you never pried. Clearly, something had happened, and although you and Joel were close, you hadn’t wanted to insert yourself into whatever drama had consumed his little found family. It made your chest hurt though, to watch him miss that girl. He’d always loved playing for her.

“Good thing I’m lazy then,” you mused softly. “Swear I couldn’t play an instrument with a gun to my head. I’ll need to keep you around.”

“Works for me,” he said, refilling both your glasses. “You on the patrol roster tomorrow?”

You shook your head, accepting the glass with a grateful smile. A slight buzz warmed your insides, fighting to keep your body temperature up as the cool breeze licked at your exposed hands and face. “Nope, I’m a free agent tomorrow, no responsibilities.”

“God damn,” he rolled his eyes. “Gonna be stuck out there all alone with Tommy.”

“Devastating,” you grinned. “I’m way better company.”

“Too right,” Joel agreed. “What’s your plan for the day, little miss no responsibilities? Still reading that book I found you?”

Probably masturbate. The thought zipped through your mind so suddenly that you felt your chest warm, and you cleared your throat softly.

“Yeah,” you replied. “Probably just read for a while. Dinner at Maria and Tommy's, remember?”

You hoped he didn’t see through the lie, because the truth was that you were embarrassed by yourself. Only a few days before you’d been struck by the realisation that you hadn’t had sex, or even been touched intimately by another person, in months. In fact, you noted sullenly, it had been half a fucking year. And you were struggling. It was your longest dry spell in a while, and every night lately you’d found yourself tangled up in your bed with your hand in your underwear, wishing desperately that someone, anyone, else was there with you.

Trying to ward off the unsavoury thoughts filling your mind, you took a deep gulp of whiskey and shut your eyes, contemplating asking if he had any cigarettes laying around.

Suddenly, a deep groan pierced the air between you and your eyes shot open. What the fuck?

With wide eyes, you saw that Joel was gripping his right leg tightly, thumb rubbing deep circles into the skin above his knee cap, and you forced yourself to relax. A sound of pain, you realised. But your heart had stuttered in your chest, because as out of character as it would’ve been, with your eyes closed it had sounded like a vaguely sexual noise. You rolled your eyes, willing yourself to get a grip. But it had been so long, and the sound of a man groaning in any way was enough to light a fire in your stomach.

“It’s the cold,” he noticed your stare. “Makes my knee ache.”

You nodded knowingly, eyes watching as his large hand gripped his thigh, applying pressure to the tender area.

“What’s up your ass?” Joel asked.

“Huh?” your gaze flashed up to meet his and found him watching you closely, eyebrows furrowed.

“You’re frownin’,” he said. “Gone all quiet suddenly.”

“So are you,” you huffed defensively, face warming. “You always fucking frown, I can’t do it one time?”

“No,” he grinned cheekily, stilling rubbing his knee. “I frown enough for the both of us. You can figure somethin’ else out.”  

You let out a begrudging chuckle and felt the indent between your eyebrows relax.

“Seriously,” he pushed. “What’s wrong? Is it too cold? We should move inside.”

“No,” you cringed, scratching the side of your neck awkwardly. Lowering your legs off the table you sat up a little straighter in your chair. “It’s good out here, I like it. I’m just… distracted, I don’t know.”

“What’s on your mind?” he sipped his whiskey.

Without needing any more prompting, you gave up on beating around the bush. “When’s the last time you had sex?”

A choked sound escaped him, and he swallowed quickly, coughing into his elbow. “Christ, what?”

“I’m not,” your cheeks were on fire. “I’m not thinking about you having sex, relax. I was thinking about me having sex. Or not having sex, to be more precise.”

He coughed again, an awkward expression flashing across his face.

You and Joel had been friends for a few years now, since he and Ellie returned to Jackson and decided to settle in the commune. After being friends with Tommy for a few years before that, you’d fallen into a natural friendship with his older brother. It was no secret that there was 20 odd year age difference between you and Joel, but in a post-apocalyptic world, it had never phased either of you. Friends were friends, and an age gap didn’t impact much. But sex was a topic that had seldom come up in conversation over those few years. Here and there maybe, but never in detail, and never so candidly.

“I almost walked in on Shae and Petra fucking the other day,” you continued plainly. “She was late for patrol, so I went over to see if she’d slept in, and I could hear them from outside the fucking house. Stood there like an ass for a minute, just listening like a creep.”

Joel watched you closely, and you noticed his hand gripped his glass a little tighter, fingertips white from the pressure “You… listened?”

“Don’t look at me like that,” you cringed, rubbing a hand over your face shamefully. “Just for a fucking second. Hadn’t realised how long it had been, and it was like my feet wouldn’t move.”

“I see.”

“You better not tell a soul about this,” you pointed at him threateningly. “I’ll end you if anybody finds out, Miller. I swear.”

“I believe you,” he snorted, holding his hands up in surrender. “My lips are sealed.”

You relaxed a little, relieved to discover that he wasn’t going to be as awkward about it as you’d first feared.

“How long has it been?”

Your eyes ticked up to stare at him again. “Like, six months or something.”

Joel let out a low whistle and nodded slowly, sipping from the crystal tumbler in his hand. “You poor soul.”

“Oh, come off it,” you scoffed in disbelief. “Don’t tell me you’re having sex and I’m not? This just keeps getting worse.”

“Fuck you,” he drawled mockingly, that deep Texan accent making you grin. “Would it be such a surprise if I was?”

“S’just bullshit,” you glowered, picking at your nails in frustration. Traces of soil still lined the creases in your palms and you rubbed at it furiously, in a fruitless attempt at cleaning them.  

“I’m not,” is all he said, and you frowned at him in confusion. “Havin’ sex,” he added with a smirk. "And it's been longer for me, so quit your whinin'."

You raised your eyebrows, appreciating the honesty. “Well thank god I’m not the only one.”

“Don’t know when I would,” he shrugged simply. “And who would I be having sex with, anyways? Spend all my fuckin’ time on patrol listening to Tommy talk for hours, or I’m sleepin’, or I’m with you.”

The thought itched so suddenly at the back of your brain, and you fought against it, shaking your head ever so slightly to push it away. Don’t think that. But it was persistent, and after a few moments of silence, your mind was filled with thoughts of you and Joel Miller fucking.

Admittedly, it was something you’d thought about once or twice when you’d first met him. He was a handsome guy, and his arrival in Jackson had definitely caused a stir among the women in the commune. But you’d fallen into a friendship so quickly, so comfortably, that the thought had never reared its ugly head again. Until now.

You watched him for a moment. His hair was dry at that point, and short messy curls framed his face and neck. He had neat dark facial hair, with sweet specks of ashy grey mixed in here and there. That familiar scar on the bridge of his nose. Lips that had gone a darker shade of pink from the cold, that you’d never realised looked quite so… plush. Eyes trailing down, your gaze raked over his hands. Long, calloused fingers that wrapped around almost the entirety of his glass. the warmth in your stomach spread downward, and you knew you should feel embarrassed at where your brain was taking you, but you couldn’t stop yourself. Images flashed through your mind of his hands gripping you like that. Fingers leaving marks on your thighs, on your neck. You shivered, looking away quickly.

“Fuck,” you sighed quietly, not even caring if he heard.

“Hey,” he said softly, assuming you were upset. “Someone’ll come along. We could talk to Tommy about setting you up or somethin’.”

You hummed noncommittally and turned in your chair to face him head on. Joel noticed and adjusted his position to do the same, raising an eyebrow. “What’s that look?” he asked, eyebrows pinching together.

Jesus, here goes nothing.

“What if we fucked?”

Joel stared. His jaw clenched almost imperceptibly, and he put his glass down on the table with a soft clink.

“What?” he said lowly, his voice taking on a sudden gravelly quality.

“I mean,” you searched desperately for the words to explain yourself, licking your lips nervously. “You said it yourself, we’re so busy, right? Always working, or sleeping, or we’re hanging out, you and me. So, what if we just… blew off a little steam together?”

His eyebrows had raised so dramatically you thought they might disappear into his hairline. It wasn’t often you managed to shock Joel, and you laughed gently at the astounded expression that decorated his face.  

“You want to blow off steam… with me?” he pointed lamely at his chest.

“Don’t sound so incredulous,” you joked. “You’re a catch, Joel. You know the teens call you a HOG, right? Hot old guy.“

“Shut up,” he held up a hand to silence you, his eyes squeezing shut tightly as you laughed at his embarrassment. “Don’t want to hear that shit.”

“It wouldn’t mean anything, Joel,” you reassured, veering back on topic. “We could just… help each other wind down after a long day.”

You watched each other in silence for a moment, and you noticed him shuffle slightly in his seat, hand gripping his knee once again. For a minute, you worried that you’d upset him. The friendship you two shared was strong, and you always known you could confide almost anything in him. He was trustworthy, and valued your word above so many others. But maybe this was over the line.

As you were about to speak again, about to take it all back and apologise for even suggesting it, he finally opened his mouth.

“It wouldn’t mean anything?” he clarified. “This won’t affect our friendship.”

You shook your head quickly. “Nothing at all. No strings, bud. Final offer.”

With a deep, rumbling sigh, Joel snatched his glass off the table and downed the remainder of its contents before standing up. “Alright then.”   

You’d been in Joel’s room a hundred times over the years. Hauling him out of bed for patrol after he’d accidentally slept in, or rifling through his chest of drawers to steal a thick pair of socks. But never for this reason. The pair of you stood awkwardly at the foot of his bed, staring at everything other than each other, as the air crackled with palpable tension.

Joel scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, and you smirked, unfamiliar with seeing him being unsure of himself.

“If you don’t want to, we can just forget I ever sai-“

“Just taking your fuckin’ clothes off,” he grunted, staring you down suddenly. Wide eyed, you felt a rush of heat through your thighs.

“Jesus,” you breathed. “Romance isn’t dead.”

He huffed out a laugh and your shoulders relaxed, happy to see a crack through his tense façade. Your tugged off your sweater, and then your shirt, tossing them over the chair in the corner of his room. Working quickly, you undid the zipper on your pants and pulled them down your legs until you were left in your underwear, a thin white singlet, and your socks.

You reminded yourself that Joel had already seen you naked, thinking back on a time when the two of you had gone skinny dipping in a lake you stumbled across on patrol the summer before. But this was so different. This wasn’t a random moment of spontaneity. And at the lake he'd been a gentleman, averting his eyes for the most part out of politeness, but now? Now he was watching your every move.

Silently, he undid the strap off his watch and placed it on the top of his dresser, before working to undo the buttons on his shirt. After he had tugged it off, you let your eyes trail over his exposed skin, and with no fabric covering him, you could see how quickly his chest rose and fell.

“Hey,” you said quietly, stepping forward and placing a hand on his chest. You felt his heart race under the warm skin and smiled. “It’s just me. Let me help you relax, okay?”

His tongue darted out to wet his lips quickly, and you wondered what it would be like to kiss him. You didn’t dwell on it though, and leaned forward to drag your lips across the skin of his neck. He smelt like rain and pine needles, and you inhaled deeply, pressing soft kisses along his pulse point. One of his hands landed heavily on your waist and his thumb begun rubbing encouraging circles over your hip bone. You hummed against his skin, pressing your chest against his. Exposed to the cool temperature, your nipples pebbled underneath your shirt, and from his exhale you knew he could feel them pressing against his bare chest.

With a slight tremor in your hand, you trailed your fingers down his chest. Through the soft hair smattered there, over the thick jagged scar on his stomach, to his belt buckle. Joel shivered lightly, gripping your waist a little tighter. You worked quickly to undo his belt, and then you dragged his zipper down. With a low sigh, you rested your hand over the front of his pants. He jolted slightly, hand sliding around your back to hold you tighter to his chest. With your face hidden in his neck, you couldn’t see his reaction, but you took the firm pressure of his hand on your back as a clear sign to continue. You palmed him gently through his pants, listening to the little puffs of air that rushed out of his nose as he kept his breathing calm. A surge of confidence rushed through you, and you stepped away, letting your hand fall away from him. His arm dropped from your back to his side, and he watched with bated breath as you lowered yourself onto your knees in front of him.

You gripped the waistband of his pants and started to drag them down his legs, helping him step out of them. Wearing nothing but a tight pair of briefs, it was impossible not to stare. You could see the shape of him through the dark fabric, your mouth salivated. More, you needed to see more. Without wasting a second, you tucked your fingers into the band of them and pulled them down slowly, giving him the chance to stop you if he wanted to. But he didn’t. He watched you with hooded dark eyes, chest moving with deep controlled breaths, his bottom lip tucked into his mouth. With his underwear gone, Joel’s cock finally came into your sight. He was only half hard, you realised with awe, and your stomach tingled as you realised what you were in for. Reaching out, your traced your fingers slowly over his hip bones, smiling as goosebumps broke out across his skin, before gently wrapping your fingers around him.

A shaky breath escaped from his nose.

“Is this okay?” you asked quietly, hand stroking softly along his length. He nodded jerkily. “Why don’t you sit on the bed?”

Joel dropped heavily onto the edge of his bed, and you moved forward to rest on your knees in between his parted legs, placing your hand back over him. The air in the room had turned humid, and you could feel sweat forming on your back out of anticipation. The only light source came from the moon shining in his window, bathing the both of you in a pale light.

“You’re so handsome,” you sighed wistfully, gripping him tighter. “I’ve always known it, but seeing you like this is different. So handsome, Joel.”

He reached out and placed a hand on your shoulder, gripping your skin and massaging the knotted muscle at the top of your back. You groaned appreciatively, and without another moment’s hesitation, you leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his thigh. No more fucking around. You needed him.

Your hand stroked him firmer, tighter, but your mouth was salivating, desperate to taste him. So you dragged wet kisses along his leg until you reached his abdomen, and then you brought your wet mouth to hover over his cock. You heard his breath hitch and smiled devilishly, staring greedily at his ruddy tip, marvelling as a drop of precum leaked out of him. Painfully slow, you pushed forward and pressed a kiss to it, tongue darting out to swipe along him and taste his salt. Joel hissed in surprise, gripping your shoulder tighter as his other hand moved to the back of your head. Not putting any pressure there, just holding you. Lathing your tongue over his head, you moaned lowly at the taste of him. Salty and warm and masculine. You could feel your underwear sticking uncomfortably against you from how wet you were. Closing your eyes, you cupped his balls gently and pressed wet kisses down his length, dragging your tongue over the pulsing vein that ran from base to tip, and basking in the short gasps that flew out of his mouth.

“Stop teasin’,” he grumbled, and you looked up with a smirk to see his dark eyes glaring down at you.

“Sorry,” you lied, before taking his head into your warm mouth and sucking gently. Slowly, you pressed forward, taking more of him in. You felt him swell against your tongue, getting harder from the stimulation, and you hummed around him. He was so big. Maybe bigger than anyone you’d been with, and you struggled to take it all. He was so thick and heavy in your mouth, it was all you could think about. Consuming every thought, every feeling; all you could focus on was the weight of him on your tongue. You worked on creating a rhythm, bobbing your head and taking as much of him in your mouth as you could, while your hand gripped him at the base, stroking him at the same time.

And finally, finally, he made a sound.

“Fuuuck,” he groaned, drawing out the vowel as a heavy breath he’d been holding escaped his lungs. His fingers dragged through your hair roughly, gripping the back of your head. You pushed yourself forward, taking more of him in until he was pressing into your throat, and you swallowed tightly around him. “Christ, feels so fuckin’ good.”

Seemingly against his will, Joel’s hips bucked upward off the bed and you gagged around him, tears springing into your eyes. He moaned lowly, cursing under his breath at the feeling of your throat contracting around him. Unable to help yourself, you removed your hand from him and lowered it down your body, slipping your fingers underneath the band of your underwear and dipping into the wet heat between your own legs. Breathing harshly through your nose, you moaned around him as your finger brushed your aching clit. You pulled back and worked your tongue over his weeping slit, enjoying the way his grip on your hair tightened as you paid close attention to the most sensitive part of him.

“You’re drivin’ me insane,” he ground out, and you glanced up to see him watching you reverently, eyes wide and glossy, cheeks flushed. “So fuckin’ hot. God, you have the prettiest mouth, how did I never notice that? Never fuckin’ thought about how good my cock would look between your lips until it was happening. I’m a fuckin’ idiot.”

Your cunt pulsed against your fingers and you whimpered, taking him back in your mouth as far as you could. God, the way he spoke made you fucking ache for him. after so many years of knowing him, hearing his voice every day, you’d never have imagined him saying things like that to you. But the weight of him in your mouth was delicious, and his words only spurred you to push forward, forward, forward, revelling in the way he groaned as your nose brushed the dark curls at his base. Tears leaked out of your eyes, rolling down your cheeks from the effort, but you didn’t stop. You slid a finger inside yourself and gagged around him again, eyes rolling back in your head at the intoxicating sensation of having something inside both your mouth and your pussy.

“Takin’ me so well,” his thumb brushed across your cheek, wiping away the tears. “God, I’m in your fuckin’ throat, baby.” The pet name made your stomach tighten, and you moaned as more slick formed around your fingers.  

“Shit,” he choked out suddenly, losing all composure. “Are you fucki-“

You moaned, eyebrows furrowing as you fucked your hand and bobbed your mouth up and down quicker over his length.

“Stop,” he ordered, saying your name firmly. “I- Stop, I’m gonna come.” You ignored him, making a high-pitched sound around him as you felt the hot coil in your stomach begin to tighten. His hand gripped your hair tighter, and he pulled you off him.

You blinked lazily up at him, eyebrows furrowed dejectedly, lips parted. A string of saliva hung in the air between your bottom lip and his tip. You dragged your fingers out of your underwear, chest heaving with heavy breaths.

“Jesus, don’t fuckin’ look at me like that,” he groaned and broke eye contact, gripping your shoulder to pull you up off the floor. “Get up.”

Pushing gently on your shoulders, he nudged you forward onto the bed, and you crawled up before collapsing with your heads against the pillows. His bed was softer than you’d anticipated, and everything smelt like him. The pillows, the duvet. God, even if this was a one-time thing, you’d never forget that smell. He followed you, settling with his legs in between yours, and placed his palms on your stomach, pushing the thin material of your shirt up and over your breasts until it was bunched around your collarbones. Your heart pounded heavily in your chest, and you were aching for him, begging him with your eyes to just please, do something, anything.

And Joel was on you before you could speak, his fingers tracing and over your nipples, squeezing the weight of your breast in his palm before latching his lips onto you. He sucked your painfully tight nipple into his mouth, tongue lazily swiping across it, driving you insane. You sighed heavily, running a hand over the skin of his back and holding him to you. His teeth grazed the sensitive skin ever so lightly and your back arched off the bed. Moving over, he shifted his ministrations to your other breast, his eyes closed as he wet your skin with his slick mouth. And then one of his hands was drifting down your stomach, tickling over your skin, under it met your underwear, and he was cupping you through the fabric. Your hips stuttered upward, and he groaned into your chest, trailing his fingers over the soaked material.

“So fuckin’ wet already,” he muttered into your skin, and you nodded franticly against the pillows. “Did you get this turned on just from havin’ my cock in your mouth? Had to touch yourself?” Surprise zapped through you once more, ecstatic to learn just how much he loved to talk during sex. It was one of your favourite things, and it had always killed you to have sex with someone who was just silent the whole time.

“Yes,” you breathed. “Wanted you to finish in my mouth.”

He bit down onto your chest in response and you cried out quietly, eyes rolling back as he sucked a mark onto your skin with his fingers continued tracing feather light over your covered core.

“Maybe later,” his voice was strained. “Need to see you come first.”

He pulled the fabric of your underwear to the side, and then he was touching you with no barrier, and you trembled beneath him. You’d forgotten how good it felt to have someone else’s hands on you.

Joel groaned as he dipped his middle finger between your warm folds, gliding it up and down along your core, getting it covered in your slick. He swirled the tip of his finger around your entrance and you whimpered, hips grinding desperately against his hand. But he didn’t go inside you. His finger moved back up, all the way up, and swiped gently over your clit and you let out a pathetic moan. Such a small, miniscule touch had your stomach tensing painfully, ridiculously close to orgasm after so much time.

Bringing his face up to rest beside yours, he sucked your earlobe into his mouth gently, before murmuring in your ear, “I want to taste you.”

You didn’t say anything, too stunned by the feeling of his fingers against you, until he probed you for a response, purring your name into your ear.

“Need to hear you say it,” he encouraged. “Tell me what you want.”

“Please,” you begged, eyes shut tightly as he rubbed soft circles around your bundle of nerves. “I want you to taste me.” A grunt of frustration left your mouth as his hand disappeared and you opened your eyes to glare at him, but your mouth fell open, awestruck, when you saw him raise his soaked digits to his lips.

“Like this?” he goaded, sucking your slick off himself and groaning.

“Please,” you repeated, mouth dry as you watched him hum around his middle finger. “Need your mouth on me, your tongue, I-“

“Okay,” he soothed, moving down the bed in an instant. “That’s all I wanted to hear.”

He spread your legs apart, fingers splayed as he held your thighs against the bed, displaying your weeping centre for him to see. A deep sound echoed though the room, and it took you a moment to realise it had been Joel. His dark eyes stared at the spot between your legs, and he dragged his fingers through the coarse hair that covered you.

His movements were torturously slow as he leaned down, pressing sloppy kisses on your hips, along the inside of your thighs, until finally his hot breaths were fanning across your core. You clenched around nothing, whimpering at how empty you felt but knowing it would have to wait.

It was like stepping into a warm bath. The second his tongue was on you, fire raced through your veins, warming your body from head to toe. A sound of relief slipped from your lips, and your eyes rolled back as he licked a broad stripe up the entire length of you. A raspy groan vibrated against you as he pressed a messy kiss against your pussy. You looked down and gasped at the sight of his eyes already on you, watching you and your reactions to him.

“Taste so fuckin’ good,” he drawled against you and you twitched at the sensation of his lips brushing against your clit. His thumbs pressed against your folds, holding you open for him to see everything, and he lathed his warm tongue against your clit, circling it until you were moaning and tensing your thighs against his hold, muscles screaming at you to press against his head and hold him to you.

You whispered his name over and over as if it were a prayer. As if you’d forgotten all other words in the English language and his name was your only salvation. His tongue dipped inside your entrance, prodding firmly until you whimpered and begged him to please, please, let you come.

He ate you out like a man possessed. Like you were his last meal and he intended to savour every god damn second of the experience. He was ravenous, lips and tongue working together to make every muscle in your body tighten until you were gasping. At some point your hand had drifted behind his head and you found yourself tangling your fingers in his hair, pulling it tightly as his mouth moved against you.

“Joel,” you groaned. He hummed against you, movements never ceasing. “Oh fuck, Joel, I’m gonna come.”

His eager moan into your cunt was all it took for you to be catapulted over the precipice and drop into your orgasm. Your body was on fire, vibrating against him as you trembled through it, moans and cries leaving your mouth as your way of thanking him. His hands held your thighs in a vice grip, and there would no doubt be marks there tomorrow to remind you were his fingertips had dug into your skin. As your body relaxed into the mattress again, he pressed a final kiss to your clit before pulling back and dragging his face across your thigh, wiping the remnants of your slick off his facial hair.

“Fuck,” he rasped, grinning up at you with glistening lips.

“So good,” you agreed, nodding as you tried to catch your breath.  

“Almost came all over the sheets,” he admitted and you laughed, beckoning him towards you. He stumbled a bit, one of his knees buckling below him on the bed, leading him to land awkwardly on top of you.  

“Shit,” he groused. “Sorry, bad fuckin’ knee. You’ve got me all bent out of shape.”

You chuckled lowly, pulling him up to lay beside you on the bed. “Let’s not put anymore pressure of them then, okay?” He watched you carefully, curiously, as you turned on your side and then moved backwards, pressing yourself flush against his chest.

His cock pulsed against your ass, and he wrapped an arm around your waist, hand splayed on your stomach to hold you against him as he rutted forward. The feeling of his wet tip dragging along your skin reignited the fire in you and you whimpered, lifting your leg only to push it back and drape it over his waist as much as you could.

“You want it like this?” he asked urgently, hot breaths fanning across your sweaty neck. He pinched your nipple between his thumb and forefinger, tugging on it gently.

You nodded, and waited as he pushed his body a little lower on the bed. His hand disappeared from your chest, and you allowed yourself to pout a little, only because you knew he couldn’t see your face. And then his left arm slithered underneath your shoulder and wrapped loosely your neck, gripping your opposite arm to pin you against him. His free hand gripped his cock and pushed it forward until he was sliding his head between your folds.

Both of you sighed at the sensation and you gripped his arm in anticipation. You could feel his torso moving against your back as he breathed, the soft hair on his chest tickling your skin.

“You ready?” he asked and you grunted, pushing back against him again.

“Joel,” you said in a dangerously low tone. “If you’ve ever cared about me, you will stop teasing and fuck me right now.”  

He laughed darkly, pressing a kiss to your shoulder. “Yes, ma’am.”

He notched his tip at your entrance and you gasped as he pressed forward, pressing himself inside of you. It took what felt like minutes for him to bottom out, and when you felt his hips pressing against your ass, you tried to relax. The burn was intense, and you cursed yourself for not anticipating a little bit of pain after such a long dry spell. Joel held still, fingers stroking carefully over the skin of your shoulder, understanding that you needed a second.

“Fuck,” you choked out. “Joel, you’re huge.”  

He let out a gravelly sound into the back of your neck, body shuddering against yours. “You’re takin’ it so well though,” he gritted out. “So tight around me, grippin’ me so good.”   

He pulled back a touch before pressing back into you, and you moaned deeply. That was all the confirmation he needed to continue, pulling almost fully out of you before moving into you harder, stronger, and beginning a steady pace. Your body jolted forward with every one of his movements, but his arm around your neck held you firmly, never allowing you to go too far.

Curses drifted from your mouth, and you hid your face in his arm, biting down on the muscle of his bicep to stifle your sounds. You clenched around him suddenly and his hips stuttered forward, slamming into you in a way that made your stomach tense deliciously. He was so fucking deep, the angle allowing him to glide against your g-spot with every thrust.

“Fuckin’,” he moaned. “You’re so good, bein’ so fuckin’ good for me, aren’t you darlin’?”

You writhed in his arms, accepting the brutal pace he’d set. His skin connected with yours over and over, a satisfying smack, smack, smack sound filling the air.

“J-Joel,” you sobbed. “Oh my fucking god, I-“ He cut you off, gripping your chin and swiftly tugging your face upward so he could see you, and then his mouth was crashing down on yours. He groaned into your mouth, tongue pressing against your lips to part them and then tangling against yours. His lips were soft and wet and you didn’t even care about the odd angle your neck was twisted at as you moaned into it. His thrusts didn’t let up for a second, even as you murmured desperate sounds against each other’s lips.  

“C’mon,” he grunted into your mouth. “Give me another one.” His hand dropped to grip your neck, the sensation only heightening the feeling of him inside you. Liquid heat was spreading in your abdomen, curling through your veins, turning your entire body into jelly. His free hand drifted down your stomach and then his middle finger was dragging across your clit, and a harsh cry spilled from your mouth.

“Shit,” you gasped, face contorting as you felt yourself near your end. He was fucking everywhere, holding you against him by your neck, pounding into you while his fingers circled your clit roughly, and the coil in your stomach just snapped. You yelled his name, body tensing up as he pushed into you, wet squelching sounds filling the air as he fucked you through your orgasm.

“Say my name,” his voice urged in your ear, and you happily obliged, chanting his name like a mantra as he worked your body through it. Within a minute he was groaning frantically, and then he pulled out, and you could feel his come coating your back as he finished. You glanced over your shoulder to see him. His mouth was ajar, soft curses falling from his lips as he gripped his cock, angling it towards you as he painted your skin with his spend.

“Sorry,” he rushed out breathlessly, wide eyes meeting yours. His shoulders shook with the intensity of his orgasm, adrenaline pumping through his veins, and you smiled at the sight. But he looked concerned, eyebrows furrowed as he looked at you warily.

“For what?” you frowned softly, rolling forward onto your stomach to free his arm that was trapped underneath you. “What’s wrong?”

“Came on you,” he clarified. “Should’ve asked first.”

A grin split across your face and his eyes lit up when he saw it, face relaxing again. “Ever the gentleman,” you chuckled. “It’s fine Joel, it was hot.”

His body relaxed and he dropped down to rest on his back, looking at you with a soft, curious expression. “It was,” he agreed quietly.

For a moment the pair of you just laid there, gazing at each other in a moment of wonder, before you suddenly became aware of how much colder the room was now that it was over. You shivered slightly, lifting to sit on your knees. Joel’s eyes trailed over your exposed body, gazing at your breasts, and your stomach, before resting on your face again.

“I’m gonna shower, and then hit the road,” you told him, cringing at the prominent ache between your thighs as you stepped off the bed. You picked your clothes up off the chair in the corner and turned back to look at him. “I’ll see you tomorrow night right, dinner at Maria and Tommy’s?”

He was watching you in a daze, eyelids heavy with drowsiness, but he nodded slowly. “Yeah,” he drawled. “Dinner at Maria and Tommy’s.” His eyes suddenly widened and he rolled over, reaching underneath his pillow before revealing a piece of small dark fabric. Your underwear. He held them out in your direction.

“Keep them big guy,” you winked, and he laughed deeply, dropping them back onto the bed.

You padded towards the door, ready to pop into the bathroom and then head home, before a thought struck you. Resting your shoulder against the doorway you looked at him again, smiling at the sight of him lying naked and fucked out on the bed, eyes closed as he breathed deeply. He looked about as relieved as you felt.

“Hey Joel,” you said quietly, and his eyes flashed open, raising an eyebrow at you. “Between us, right? Probably best if we don’t tell anyone else this happened.”

He nodded once, smiling lazily. “Between us.”

part two

[byooregard]

x men tumblr dashboard simulator

bluebabadee

THIS BLOG IS A SAFE SPACE FOR NON-HUMAN PASSING MUTANTS. HUMAN PASSING MUTANTS DNI

10 notes 📌Pinned Post

sparklejays Follow

based on your likes!

every time I see a human talking about "how cool it would be to have superpowers" or some shit like that I loose it a little bit more. do these people realize that being a mutant isn't just fun powers. like even beyond the shit I deal with trying to get jobs or all the relationships that have been ruined once people realized I'm a mutant. abilities aren't just fun and games, I have a friend who can't touch people without nearly killing them, I burned down three buildings before someone finally taught me to control my abilities, and these people are all like "wouldn't it be great to fly to work every day??" just admit that you see us as comic book characters and not real people with real struggles

#actually mutant #jay .txt

276 notes

scamperpamperblog reblogged spocktism

🏙️tilleys-brain Follow

self diagnosing is great and all but most of you people aren't telepaths, you're just hyperempathic

#actually mutant #actually telepathic #hyperempathy #crosstagging i know but some of yall need to see this #tilley speaks #it can be dangerous to go around acting like you know peopels actual thoughts when its just your brain

1,657 notes

oh-you-pretty-things

.

#vent post #sometimes I get really mad at magneto #like I think he's done a lot for mutant rights and stuff #but I'm so fucking tired of everyone assuming that I'm evil just because of my powers #like jesus not all of us are trying to start atomic wars #some metallokinetics just use their abilities to make cool sculptures #but I can't get a spoon from across the room in front of strangers without someone mentioning jfk

3 notes

mutantbuffy reblogged muntantpollscentral

🩻mutantpollscentral

*physical mutation meaning something that is ALWAYS physical, not just something you can turn off and on whenever

#ig my mutation IS technically physical its just not visible to people most of the time so i feel weird claiming that #but like i was born with the tattoo marks #the powers didnt come till later tho #so idk which to pick

668 notes

sploimsh reblogged jesterjuleses

🎹pussy-truck-faggot

HEY! shout-out to people with *weird* mutations. Mutations that don't look cool, mutations that are gross, mutations that are dirty, mutations that you can't tell people about because they always cringe. You're just as valid as every other mutant out there. Your powers don't need to be palettable to humans for you to be treated with respect.

#THIS!!! #rb

5,678 notes

rosetvler

god i am so tired of the hypocrisy in this community. the double standards are insane. its okay to have 'scary' powers but the moment someone's abilities are scarier than like, pyrokinesis you're evil and dangerous to be around. 'acceptance' for you people only means nice mutants who've never hurt or scared anyone ever.

rosetvler reblogged rosetvler

non-mutants can reblog this btw

#srb #actually mutant #getting real tired of this

18 notes

katiedidnt reblogged morelikesexmen

🩻magicsteele27 Follow

okay like. i get that were all about acceptance and pride or w/e but no one in this tag has ever had friends irl i swear. if someone asks you not to read their mind you shouldnt. honestly you shouldnt be using telepathy on people at all without their permission. mutant abilities dont disclude you from respecting peoples boundaries

🌌rosetvler Mutuals

i swear to god you people are such hypocrites. its all 'mutant and proud' until someone has a power you dont like. its always about keeping the humans feeling comfortable instead of thinking about how it feels to never use your powers because theyre breaking 'boundaries' that were made up by humans in the first place

🩻magicsteele27 Follow

dude do you hear yourself right now

🎆jade-the-pyromancer Follow

Hey, I like your point op, but maybe you should stop trying to speak over actual telepaths and let them decide how to use their powers themselves???

🩻magicsteele27 Follow

i. i am a telepath.

#duddeeee telepaths are insane #used to be friends with one SO glad i broke that off before it went too bad

15,678 notes

[faetima]

𝐚𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐞. .

. . one day you receive an odd text from an unknown number. you try blocking the number, but it doesn’t work.

oh well, it’s probably just someone pranking you.

right?

// tws ; lil bit of cursing, stalking ; gn reader ; modern au, yandere au

a/n: sorry for the weird formatting!! tumblr wouldn't let me format it correctly :(

also sorry for the random bigger text, it keeps changing random letters and numbers to be bigger for some reason??

𝗣𝗟𝗔𝗬𝗟𝗜𝗦𝗧.

aconties — symbolize hatred and that you should be cautious.

aconite - veil

always forever - cults

jealous girl - lana del rey

suki suki daisuki - jun togawa

yes or yes - twice

saccharine - jazmin bean

stalker’s tango - autoheart

an unhealthy obsession - tbrso

candy coated suicide - night club

i wanna be your boyfriend - hot freaks

i’m a slave 4 u - jazmin bean

the red means i love you - madds buckley

body - mother mother

red lights - bang chan, hyunjin

playlist <3

𝟭.‎‎‎‎‎

‎‎‎unknown number has started a chat !

18:12 december 12th, 2024

unknown number

hello, my aconite. :)

you

hi

who is this?

unknown number

oh, dont worry about that.

youll know very soon, my beloved aconite. <3

read 18:20

you have blocked unknown number !

…

your block was unsuccessful ! please try again later .

𝟮.

‎‎‎unknown number has started a chat !

13:27 december 13th, 2024

unknown number

hello, my aconite!

how was your day today?

sent 13:27

unknown number

hello?

sent 16:43

unknown number

please reply. i know youre online, aconite.

you

please stop

who is this??

unknown number

i told you before !

haha, my aconite is so silly. never remembers anything.

like your math homework yesterday, hm? completely forgot to do it!

so cute.<3

read 17:38

you have blocked unknown number !

…

your block was unsuccessful ! please try again later .

𝟯.

‎‎‎unknown number has started a chat !

12:12 december 14th, 2024

unknown number

who is that boy?

you

?

unknown number

the one sitting across from you.

he keeps looking at you.

he keeps touching you. its pissing me off.

who is he?

you

he’s my friend

unknown number

sure.

well see how long that lasts. :)

read 12:48

--

you looked up from your phone, glancing towards bennett, and then around the small cafeteria which was packed with people, a shiver running down your spine.

whoever was texting you was here, and they were watching you.

𝟰.

‎‎‎unknown number has started a chat !

12:58 december 17th, 2024

unknown number

my beloved aconite, arent you supposed to be in class rigjt now?

right ***

ignore that.

and, most importantly, arent you supposed to be paying attention?

come on darling, on your phone in the one class i so happen to be in?

you can do this in chemistry or something. dont do it just when i so happen to be near you. i know for a fact you dont do this in any other class.

anyways, see you later ❤️❤️

read 13:02

𝟱.

you have started a chat !

09:27 december 18th, 2024

you

BENNETT

HELP KE

NE

ME

benny

Huh? Wht happened? R u ok?

you

NO

THERE’S THIS GHY

OR GIRL I DON’T KNOW

AND I THINK HE’S STALKING ME OR SOMETHING

benny

Huh?? Wdym?

you

LIKE

OKAY I DON’T KNOW IF HE’S STALKING ME

BUT HE’S GIVING ME REALLY FREAKY VIBES

HE KEEPS TEXTING ME

AND HE SAW ME TALKING TO YOU

AND THEN HE ASKED ABT THAT

AND HE WAS LIKE “HE WON’T BE YOUR FRIEND FOR LONG 🙂”

AND AND AND

APPARENTLY HE’S IN MY MATH CLASS???

AND HE SAW ME ON MY PHONE

JND TEHN HE TEXTED ME AND SCOLED ME

HELP WHAT DO I DO

benny

Just block him

you

I TRIED

IT’S NOT WORKING??

benny

Well I dont think u can do anything abt it besides that

Bc u dont hv any proof that he has any malicious intent

So uhm maybe just ignore him

Maybe hes just trolling u

you

yeah

maybe

read 10:01

--

you let out a sigh, putting your phone face down and burying your face in your arms.

what could you even do at this point? you didn’t have any proof they had any bad intent, and you couldn’t block them.

this whole situation was starting to freak you out. it didn’t help that you were pretty emotional and easily scared.

maybe you should look on the positive side. hey, someone finally has a crush on you!

you swallowed hard, breathing rapidly, heart racing. you buried your face deeper in your arms, scared of what was to come from this whole situation.

𝟲.

you exhaled shakily, a small fog appearing from it. you were shivering, the outside cold pinpricking your skin like tiny needles.

choosing fashion over warmth probably hadn’t been a good idea, but who cared? you liked dressing up. it was worth sacrificing your comfort for something you enjoyed! plus you would’ve been cold either way. it would be heated enough in the classroom anyway.

at least you hoped it would be.

you walked at moderately fast pace to your school, putting in your earbuds. you scrolled down your playlist on spotify, finally finding the song you had been craving to listen to. you clicked the play button on it, refraining from humming along to it.

you found yourself repeatedly glancing behind yourself, even though each time you looked no one was there. every time there was even the slightest of rustling able to penetrate through the sound of the music you were listening to, you’d jump, paranoid.

ever since you had received the first message, you had been on edge, and for good reason. this whole situation was extremely different from what you experienced in your day to day life.

before this, you hadn’t even known of anyone liking you romantically. it wasn’t that everyone hated you or something, you were just pretty shy, which led others to socialize with and notice you less.

a lot less.

it was a bit disappointing, but at least you had a few friends.

you had been lost in your train of thought too long. as you walked forward mindlessly, you hadn’t noticed a figure also walking in front of you.

you crashed into the person and staggered a little before regaining your balance.

luckily the person didn’t fall or anything, but instead stood rigid like a stone wall.

you gasped out a few apologizes, repeatedly saying “sorry”.

but you immediately shut up when the person turned around and when electric purple eyes met your own.

you swallowed hard, freezing as the person scowled at you.

𝟳.

“watch where you’re going,” the person muttered, still scowling at you. her loosely braided hair—a shade of bright purple, similar to that of an aconite, with some lighter purple highlights within it—fell down the front of her shoulder, and she pushed it back. the motion itself was filled with pure elegance and grace.

”i- uhm, sorry,” you mumbled, your neck getting hotter as you lowered your head a little in shame.

the girl rolled her eyes.

even that was full of daintiness and fluidity.

she sighed the slightest bit, seeming to soften a little.

”it’s fine, i guess. just watch where you’re going in the future.”

she mumbled those words quickly before turning and walking away briskly, pulling out her phone and rapidly texting someone whilst walking.

the sharp clicking of her heels was the only thing heard in the crisp and cold morning air.

suddenly, your phone buzzed. you took it out, hands trembling the tiniest bit.

--

‎‎‎unknown number has started a chat !

07:54 december 19th, 2024

unknown number

where are you?

youre in class by this time.

read 07:54

unknown number

answer me.

read 08:01

unknown number

stop fucking leaving me on read.

read 08:04

you have blocked unknown number !

…

your block was successful !

𝟴.

22:39 december 20th, 2024

unknown number

youre going to regret this so, so much my pretty aconite.

im going to pick all your petals off.

one

by

one. <3

your message was not able to be sent ! you may have been blocked by the recipient . if not, please try again later . if the problem persists, please contact customer support .

𝟵.

a few days had passed since you had blocked the number.

now you sat in class, chin placed in the palm of your arm. you felt eerily drowsy, but knew it was just because of how bored you were. the teacher droned on and on about some sort of math formula. you didn’t bother listening, knowing it would only make your head hurt if you tried to understand what was going on.

you were snapped out of your sleepy daze when the teacher said something about a “group project”. she said there would be groups of three or four, and that groups would be predetermined, but you could request to be put in a group with someone else.

the person sitting in front of you passed you the slip to request to be put into a group with someone.

you passed it to the person behind you after realizing what the slip was for.

you just had to be assigned a group project in the class you had no friends in. it could’ve been in literally any other class, but no, instead it was in the class where you barley knew anyone.

you didn’t put anyone on the slip because you barley knew anyone in the class, and the people you knew probably were already going to put someone else on the paper.

you put your head down in your arms, closing your eyes, listening to the erratic chatter around you.

what you didn’t notice was that, on the slip, someone had already put your name down alongside theirs.

𝟭𝟬.

you sighed softly, finally done with school for the day. you opened the door to your house, and were hit by the strong and unmistakable aroma of your favorite meal. 

you stepped into your house, closing the door quietly and setting your backpack down. you greeted your mom, who greeted you back. she stood in the kitchen, cooking your favorite meal.

”can you go to the store for me? i need salt for this, but we ran out,” your mom stated, gesturing towards what she was cooking.

you nodded silently, turning to leave. you opened the door, closed it, and started walking to the store.

--

upon entering, you couldn’t help but notice how empty it was. usually there were at least a few other people, but right now you could only spot around four.

you walked around the store but, even after ten minutes of sauntering around, couldn’t find the salt for some reason. maybe you were going blind or something.

you decided to ask an employee, timidly walking up to one and tapping him on the shoulder.

he turned around, bright purple eyes meeting your own. a scowl, which didn’t quite seem to fit him, adorned his pretty face. his hair was a dull shade of purple, and light wispy bangs fell on his forehead. his skin was extremely clear and pale like porcelain, and looked as if it could shatter any second. the resemblance to a doll he bore was uncanny.

”what?” he snapped, glaring at you through his bangs.

”uhm, sorry to bother you, but, uh, do you.. do you know where the salt is?” you asked, fidgeting a little with your fingers.

he let out a long, deep sigh.

”yes. follow me,” he muttered, already walking towards the isle.

you followed in suit.

𝟭𝟭.

tentatively, you looked up from your hands to see who was in your group.

the first person you laid your eyes upon was a girl with light blue hair tied into an elegant and sleek ponytail with a black ribbon with golden streaks. she had a small beauty mark under one of her eyes, which were a pale shade of blue, matching her hair.

sitting beside her was a guy who was a bit taller than her. he had green eyes and messy honey-yellow hair that was tied into a ponytail with a scarlet red ribbon.

you moved your gaze to the last person.

he seemed oddly familiar, like you had seen him somewhere before. you couldn’t quite remember where though, maybe at park or store?

he had feathery bangs which fell down his forehead in a almost perfect matter. his hair itself seemed to be styled in a jellyfish cut of sorts, and was a dim shade of lavender. his eyes matched the color of his hair, and were narrowed to form a scowl on his pretty face. his skin was eerily pale, almost like porcelain.

the boy who you were just looking at let out what seemed to be an annoyed sigh, crossing his arms and rolling his eyes at something.

the blonde boy spoke up first.

”so, uhm.. hi. i’m thoma.”

following in suit, you all said your names after him.

thoma spoke again.

”do you guys have a phone number or something we can use to contact each other with for the project? i already have ayaka’s, so i just need you boths’.” 

scaramouche shook his head.

”i don’t have access to my phone right now,” he muttered, still scowling

”oh.”

”we, uhm, we can use instagram or something to message each other?” you said, the slightest hint of nervousness lacing your voice.

”sure,” ayaka said.

scaramouche and thoma nodded in agreement.

you all wrote down your usernames on a piece of paper.

--

once you got home, you took out your phone, typing all their usernames into the search bar and following them one by one. after doing so, you added them all to a group chat.

𝟭𝟮.

you have started a chat !

18:12 december 27th, 2024

you

hi

@.lookingforthoma

Hello.

@.hidingfromayaka

🤑

@.flowers4sc4ra

hi. ig.

@.hidingfromayaka

LMAOO WHY IS UR USERNAME THAT

UR ALWAYS SO EMO BUT NOW

”FLOWERS4SC4RA”

LMOA LMOA

@.flowers4sc4ra

shut the fuck up.

you

pls stop

@.flowers4sc4ra

sorry. ig.

@.hidingfromayaka

OMFG

HE KIST

USYT

JUST

SAID SORRY

TO U

SHEJSHWJAHAAKAKWK

you

okay anyway

there’s two parts on the project

i was thinking we could split up into teams of two and then each do one part or smth?

idk man 😭😭

@.lookingforthoma

That sounds good.

@.flowers4sc4ra

ok.

@.hidingfromayaka

i call dibs on working with ayaka 😛😛

1 user disliked

𝟭𝟯.

you stood in front of his house’s door, rocking back onto your heels and then up onto your toes, nervous. you clutched the bag you were holding—of which was filled with notebooks and various school supplies.

you were anxious, waiting for scaramouche to answer the door. it had only been a minute, but to you it felt like ten.

you couldn’t shake the feeling that something bad was going to happen. you didn’t know why or how or when or where, just that you had a bad gut feeling.

but you shook it off, knowing you had to work on the project.

all of the sudden the door opened, slamming against the wall in a violent manner, making you flinch a little, torn out of your thoughts.

you glanced at the doorway, laying your eyes on the indigo-haired boy.

”uhm, hi,” you mumbled, swallowing nervously.

”hi,” he replied, voice and face blank; devoid of any emotion, “uh, d’you wanna come in?”

you uttered a small okay, walking inside after he shuffled a little to the side.

“we can work in the living room, i guess.”

you nodded silently, following scaramouche as he walked to the living room.

--

upon arriving, you placed your bag—which you had been clutching so hard your knuckles had turned white—down. you both sat down on the ground, and, after taking your things out, started working on the project.

scaramouche was sitting slightly behind you, doing his part of the project. once every few minutes, he would lean his head over your shoulder—face almost touching it—in order to see what progress you had made.

your heart beat much, much faster every time he did it, face getting hot.

and of course that didn’t go unnoticed by scaramouche.

--

around an hour after working on the project, you asked scaramouche where the bathroom was.

”straight, then go left,” he said. he didn’t even glance up at you as he told you where to go, just continued writing on the notebook splayed out in front of him.

you got up, walking out of the living room and straight like he said.

only problem was you didn’t quite remember if he had said to go right or left after going straight.

you decided to go right, and came across a door. assuming it was the bathroom, you opened it.

you really wished you hadn’t after you saw what was inside.

𝟭𝟰.

after you had opened the door and seen what was inside, you really wished you hadn't.

inside there were hundreds and hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of photographs. they were plastered all over the walls, overlapping each other. they covered the ground, the walls, the ceiling, everything. the only things in the room besides that were a bed, a desk, and a computer monitor, which was lit up.

the bright screen blared at you, enticing you to come look.

the monitor displayed pictures of a house, probably running from security cameras or the like.

but it wasn't just any house, no.

it was your house.

your room.

your kitchen.

your living room.

your fucking house.

a wave of dizziness and nausea hit you. you felt sick to your stomach, leaning on the doorway for support.

then you heard something clattering behind you, falling to the floor.

you looked behind you, eyes wide.

scaramouche was standing there, frozen. he had dropped his phone to the ground, which had a photo of you working on the project opened on it.

”why the fuck are you in my room?” he burst out, almost yelling at you.

his room?

you became even more still than you were before, if that was even physically possible.

”y-you- your room?” you uttered, voice audibly shaking.

scaramouche just glared at you, hands fisted up.

then he took a step toward you.

you, in turn, stepped backwards.

the slightest rusting of paper was heard—presumably some of the photographs getting crushed underneath your feet.

he walked closer.

you backed away.

it was a vicious cycle which eventually ended when you bumped into a wall. some photographs fell down to the floor from the motion.

scaramouche cornered you in, staring at you with an unknown glint in his eyes.

it was a combination of everything you had made him fucking feel—obsession, anger, lovesickness, loathing.

he leaned in towards you, mouth almost touching your ear from how close he was. his hot breath fanned across your neck.

”well, since you’ve already seen everything, there’s no point in letting you leave now, hm? not when you’re right where i want you, my beloved aconite,” he whispered, pulling away. scaramouche grinned.

he stared at you with a mixture of emotions in his eyes, but the most prominent was limerence.

 “you’re finally all mine. my aconite.”

[thecomicallytragicgangle]

[It is done]

[mod note: this is temporarily replacing the link to magma (the art drawing thing we have so we can draw together!) as pinned post so heres the link: https://magma.com/d/zzg8vd99i2]

[the reason gangle isnt included is because she went to go get snacks totally not because i forgot to draw her. nope]

[credits to shard anon, @theoneandonlysun, and the mod of zooble's blog for majority help! @eeboshmeebo also contributed to the art!!][if you helped with the art and you wanna be credited, message me please, because i might've missed you? a lot of people swung by i just wanna make sure i credit them all]

[behold....]

[TA DAH!!! below the read more thing is the list of people featured + pings (sorry yall, i just wanna make sure you see art,,)]

[btw, bonus: @easton-likes-sandwiches my bad i couldn't include you (since easton is kinda. not in digital land.) but here ya go, a bonus!]

1: @rook-specter [i hope i drew you correctly, i couldn't really find a sona to use]

2: @the-moth-from-elsewhere [btw i know you wanted to add details but imo i think it looks fine like this,,thanks for some of the help and support, though!!]

3: pickle anon [unsure if they have a blog, so i can't @]

4: shard anon!! [also unsure if they have a blog, but they helped alot!! ty ty]

5: @unfunnyaceartist [OK i know you only appeared for a bit but you agreed to move night.,,and your sona looks cool..so..obilgatory appearance in the art!]

6: @sugarcane-soup [I DIDNT KNOW HOW TO COLOR YOUR SONA,,i hope i did well]

7: @zooooble [zoob...]

8 and 9: [@askobjects firey and leafy look so goofy in this image,, i hope you like them]

10: @sign-anon [in the middle of drawing this i did NOT know sign anon died..whoops?]

11: @boldtextanon [bold text anon is fine guys. Hes fine. i swear]

12: @yougotjinx3d [mage anon and vamp anon were drawn by sun if i remember correctly, so erm..ya!! they're silly people]

13: @bloodforvampanon [me when i GET YOU. but fr. silly guy]

14: crownon! [unsure if they have a blog, but erm..crow]

15: eepy anon!! [also unsure if they have a blog..they literally look so silly its crazy]

16: rat [you know who you are /silly]

17: @gummy-axolotl [I HOPE I GOT THE COLORS RIGHT,,HERE YOU GO!!!]

18: @liloblogs [im gonna be fr we got this close to confusing lilo with juko,,,im not very great at oc lore. but lilo is so silly]

19: panic anon! [i think they're also the same blog as lilo? unsure. but yea!! they are goofy and silly and probably terrified of the horror movies]

20: @justadustymoth [MOTh. moth,,,,, moths are so silly. like. fr..]

21: bow anon! [idk if you have a blog but i hope you like the design!!!!]

22: @squirrelboi [I DIDNT KNOW IF YOU HAD A SONA SO I USED YOUR PFP...I HOPE THATS OKAY]

23: @eeboshmeebo [there was barely any room so i could only include a mask,,but i hope thats okay!! also ty for help on the mask]

24: @kiwidragon [I HOPE I DREW THE DRAGON OK..IVE NEVER DRAWN DRAGONS HGHJFJFJF AND IDK THE SIZE COMPARISON..]

25: FISH. ANON.. [you got included last minute HGKDHJSHJSHS but . fish]

26: @lightthepathwithalantern [i hope i drew lantern anon okay,,,they're so cool looking,,,]

27: @spapman [I ALSO HOPE I DREW YOUR SONA OKAY,,, AHHFHGFHDHJD

28: @ru-bwee [thank you for. the plush images. I will use them to mark important events /silly]

29: @bob-the-cemetery-ghost [Oh no,,,also i hope you dont mind being a bit in the background i didnt know how else to include youuu]

[literal walls of text,,hope yall dont mind all the @]

[THANK YOU ALL FOR BEING HERE,,HGHDJSJDFDD!!!!]

[erm,,if yall don't mind,,i hate asking but reblogs please ? i wanna see the art around !!!!]

[bulkhummus]

wtnv 245 live react

1. I’m predicting some Esteban due to the art for the episode PLEASE mention Esteban

2. Thank god i was worried they forgot he had a kid for a moment there. Cute cute cute cecil wants to put his work in a galllerryyyy supportive dad lets go

3. ABBY MENTION LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOO ABBY LOVE OF MY FUCKING LIFE

3. Carlos thats not FOOD

4. Did you cecil, did you really turn out just fine. By all appearances…….. im obsessed with him

5. Whoa kareem asking about he portal….. i see plot things are developing i see….

6. Im so excited hes talking about a family dinner this is so fucking good for my personally. ABBY REMEMBERING A DRAWING CECIL DID AS A CHILD IM GONNA LOSE MY MINDDDD

7. THIS IS FUCKING EVERYTHING TO ME. CECIL ID HANG YOUR DRAWINGS. IGNORE YOUR MOM. it being similar to estebans…………. HER KEEPING THE DRAWINGS ILL CRY ILL CRY

8. A house next to a tree.. …….. cecil babe that is not watercolors…….

9. Hey hey hey remember when remember when cat ballou ended with a shovel digging up at the base of a tree hey remember the owls

10. oh this episode is everything to me already jesus

11. Oh honey… hes concerned about the art work… i will have much to say about this i just know i will. A parent thinking their childs artwork is perfect and good and great no matter what it is. Abby being the one to say the images look the same afterall….. theres so much to unpack here. This is definitely gonna unpack some cecil childhood trauma

12. stop this is really sad to me :((((( why is he crouched behind the tree i dont like that i dont like that…. HEY DONT GO INTO THE TREE HEY HEY DONT DO IT

13. ;leisfngse;ougnar;ibjaef;viajenv;idjfvnadi;fjvnad;ifvjnad;fovjandf;vojadnfv;aidfjn HEY IM LOSING MY MIND THIS IS CONFIRMING A LOT OF FUCKING THINGS PEOPLE HAVE SPECTULATED ABOUT FOR AGES ABOUT ABBY CECIL AND THEIR MOTHER IN THE WOODS IM GONNA LOSE MY MIND

14. ABBY SO PROMINENT THIS EPISODE LETS GO

15. Oh……………….. dad mention,,,,,,,,,,,, abby sighing…………… oghh this is so good

16. WHERE IS ESTEBAN ILL CRY ONE MILLION YEARS

17. GRANDPA GERSHWIN GRANDPA GEWSHWIN I DREW GRANDPA GERSWHIN I JUST KNEW ESTEBAN WOULD ALSO HAVE VISIONS I JUST FUCKING KNEW IT IN MY HEART AND SOUL

18.abby is abby oh….. this is…….

19. Cecil is so cute

20. Cecil goong through childhood memories while confirming he doesnt know if he and abby like eachother is really sad… until dawn..

21. Salmon and blueberry smoothie i now carlos is a health freak on god

22. CHIN ON HIS SHOULDER.

23. “Oh babe, she did. We stopped scrabble for 30 minutes to hear her story. To be honest I’ve heard her tell it to you so many times now its growing a bit dull…. DO YOU NOT REMEMBER?” Im getting some real man in the tan jacket vibes from this

24. Oh im so sad this is so so so so sad

Okay conclusion:

What a heart breaking episode.

[cpunkwitch]

Hey, it's the anon that asked if chronic pain counted as a physical disability

I guess I just wanted to ask a few other things because you're like the first person who has actually answered my questions on this kind of stuff— I'm sorry if it becomes annoying or if my questions are stupid, I really struggle with research and stuff, so if this stuff is easily found on google or something then im sorry

I wanted to mainly ask what counts as debilitating? I mean my chronic pain tends to come in episodes that last a few minutes to a few hours (well the most noticeable of it, which is my ribs. But I do tend to havesort of aches in my joints, knees((are they joints?)), hip and some other places pretty commonly, and that usually lasts a few hours but I'm usually good at ignoring that), sometimes it can happen every day for a week and sometimes I can go weeks without experiencing or noticing any pain. I can still do things that most people do I think? Other than running or walking up hills, that usually takes away all my breath and makes the pain really bad (so bad I've had to lay on the floor for up to 10-20 minutes because I walked up too many hills). I don't know if that would count as debilitating

For further context, I am quite young and I don't have any diagnosis, I haven't seen a doctor over it because my parents don't believe my pain is real and often say it's growing pains (I don't think it is, since it started back when I was like 7-9, so before I started growing) so I don't really know much about this or my body really

Again sorry if this is a sort of stupid question, if you can't answer it or don't feel comfortable answering it that's perfectly fine ^_^ /gen

holding you gently (if touch is okay)

i dont think you understand anon im autistic all i do is research please please ask me to your hearts content! /silly

going bit by bit so its easier on my dyslexia, what counts as debilitating? subjective to the person but overall; debilitating means a condition or otherwise symptom of some kind causng a person to be weak, effects their usual functions or otherwise hindering, so for something to be disabling / debilitating and to count as such, it just means it hinders you in some way and generally makes you weaker in a "more suseptible to" way, such as chronic pain making it so you cant get out of bed i the morning, you cant lift heavy things like chairs etc.

it common for chronic pain and other chronic conditions to come in episodes my moms chronic migranes for example only happen about once a month. it still counts as chronic so long as its reoccuring and when it does occur if it hinders you in any way then it very much counts as debilitating and therefore a disablity.

the pain level doesnt have to be consistent nor does the time length, just that its reoccuring in some way.

knees are joints yes. when it comes to joint issues and pain its likely that form of chronic pain is caused by a type of arthritis, fibromyalgia and/or some other autoimunity that is known to cause that. not certain but i just felt like that might be worth noting.

my chronic pain causes me issues with walking just like that, people without this condition dont often struggle with losing energy nor feel pain after walks or runs, uphill or otherwise, unless they have something else goig on with their body. if it effects you lower body its no surprise your mobility in that area is effected in some way too. i got myself a cane to help me with this as i walk uphill to work often (at least its one reason it helps me)

that hinderance alone, effectig your stamina, counts as debilitating, it might now sound or feel as severe as what other people expirience but it counts

it sucks that people equate age to conditions and then dont believe young people like us when we have issues, but age has nothing to do with it, you can expirience anything like this at any age for a number of reasons. i was born with a defect i my spine we didnt find until i was 18-19 and id been i pain for well over a decade now.

you'll find its hard to get people to listen to you now, but once you know what to say, for example telling them how long that this has been going on and how it effects you, even what you suspect it night be and dont let them derail from exploring those possabilities, you can /get/ them to listen to you.

sucks hard that people wont listen in the first place, especially when they think they know everything. but youre the only one whos gonna know and understand your body best because only you can listen to it when it sends you signals like pain.

(i genuinely enjoy these kinds of asks i love getting to ramble)

[officialgleamstar]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

thank u for the tag @cerealmonster15 :] sorry for forcing you into tagging me and then FORGETTING TO DO IT ONCE I GOT OFF WORK but insomnia is killing me tonight sooo tag game time :3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

127 fics on my account, and then 130 anonymous fics, and two? maybe three? orphaned fics lol

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

826,251! getting close to 1 mil... maybe that should be a writing goal for this year :0

3. What fandoms do you write for?

currently its oxventure all the way down, baby bfdjgfdhhj i have a few dndads fics im still working on though, and i have an aftg fic im working on for an event right now as well! i need to... make sure i finish that on time, actually

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

they aaare mostly anonymous LOL but! for fics i list, these ones. the way that three of these are from 2017 and 2018... i know that makes sense because theyve had more time to accumulate kudos and also are for more popular fandoms but :') man 1. Cleaning Up - Haikyuu!! - 908 kudos 2. heart under your sleeve - 3rd Life - 616 kudos 3. four am - All For the Game - 502 kudos 4. his soul - Empires SMP, 3rd Life - 391 kudos 5. "Are you dense, or do you just not know how to say no?" - All For the Game - 288 kudos

5. Do you respond to comments?

yes i do!!! im bad at it, but i do :D

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

just like cereal, i dont write much angst, but probably you know i love you, right? or these feelings, they're not gone :0

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

most of my fics are disgustingly sweet and sappy so its hard to judge

8. Do you get hate on fics?

i have a few times but not enough to be a trend, lol

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yeah lol if i cant write pet play and/or breeding kink i wither up and die. who said that

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

just once! (can you kiss me more) absolutely beloved

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

two times that i know of

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

yeah lol someone translated a handful of my old rpf fics into russian :]

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yeah, but never a finished fic

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

you simply cannot make me choose. you cant make me choose. please.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Divorced Dad Rock Mix you are everything to me but chapter 3 thru 6 are probably never seeing the light of day

16. What are your writing strengths?

im really good at telling a compelling story in a very small amount of word :] also, SPEED WRITING. i can write very quickly when i put my mind to it!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

im so awful at ending fics just absolutely dogshit at it

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

its . writing dialogue in another language, i guess? lol its fine

19. First fandom you wrote for?

pokemon or harry potter i think. maybe my little pony or minecraft. or world of warcraft but i think that was later? id have to dig through my deviantart and i dont feel like it lol

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

god that is a hard question to answer, i love all of my fics a lot bfdgfjhdbghjd i think... the first fic to come to mind was, naturally, my beloved your love is tried and true-blue. normscary <333 AND my glennry soulmate fic as well, so where do we begin? hmmm... the johnny spells thing comes from a very personal space, and its a fic that i thought about for literal years, so its very near and dear to me in that sense as well. and on our dates, it's never daytime is a super self-indulgent fic that i reread a lot because its so perfectly targeted at myself lol same thing for fall (back) in and i love mine, mine, mine for more recent examples. uh. okay thats a lot of rambling LOL those i guess :3

tagging: hmmmmm @bidoofenergy and @cookies-over-yonder i think!!! have fun guys

[cupoftaae]

Forever And A Day (KTH x READER) series ♡ Francis Forever (chapter 17)

Summary: your lifelong friend is forced to face his true feelings for you once he breaks the number one rule of becoming friends with benefits: dont fall in love. He knows he loves you, but you on the other hand need more convincing of the most important thing: the right decision.

Genre: fwb. Roommates, friends to idiots to lovers, fluff, angst, smut, the whole 9 yards tbh.

Pairing: taehyung x female!reader

rating: 18+ (minors dni!!!)

word count- 5k

warnings- swearing, angst, mentions of miscarriage, confused feelings, some kissing (some smut not really its like 2 seconds), REALLY EMO

a/n- guys....we have reached the final chapter of Forever And A Day, oh my god. Ive worked on this story since January, its very dear to me, Thank you for everyone who tagged along. I love you so much! there will still be an Epilogue posted as well. Enjoy the chapter angels

-nini

Your feet led you down to the kitchen, where your mom was currently cleaning.

"hi honey" she mumbled, not turning around to see you as she scrubbed the top of the stove.

"hey.." you walk over, opening the fridge and looking for something to snack on. Granted- there was something made for breakfast but you hadn't woken up until 12pm. Technically, it was now lunch.

"do you want me to make you something?"

You peer over to your mom whos putting things away in the storages

"no thats okay" you grab a sleeve of crackers from the cabinet and some cream cheese, opting to sit at the kitchen island with your sad "meal"

"thats not lunch, missy" your mother scolded as she turned to you finally

"meh" you shoved the cracker in your mouth as you watched her grab her coat from the hanger. "where are you going?" you spoke with a full mouth.

"I have to run to the store"

"didnt you just go the other day?"

Your mom peered over her shoulder, waiting a moment "yes...but, I forgot to grab...uh....planter feed, for my little window plants" she nodded over in the direction of them.

"okay....can I come?" you mumble, throwing another dry cracker into your mouth.

"no" she laughed, making you look up

"what, why?"

"because" she began to ramble "well...I love you but Ive spent every minute with you this week, its good to be alone for a few hours"

You raised an eyebrow as if you didnt believe her.....because you didnt. "okayyy..." your voice dragged out

"ill be back in no time, no worried dear." she grabbed her bag and walked to the door, "ill bring you back a coffee" she winked as she left.

Once you heard the door lock, you stood up, licking the cream cheese off your fingers.

why was she in such a hurry to be gone?

Your feet wandered over to the little plant cabinet she had, opening it to see a freshly stocked basket of soil feed packets. Of course she was lying.

She was probably looking for an excuse to see that guy shes been talking to for months now. Why would she lie though? does she think you couldn't handle it?

Chosing to ignore it, you picked up her cat and made your way upstairs to your room, sitting down at your desk.

These days you werent out much, last time you saw other people was 2 days ago when you went to go grab the mail from the mailbox in the pouring rain. Nonetheless, you still loved to get yourself dolled up as if you were going out.

You applied some makeup, carefully drawing out your eyeliner to a sharp point. The way you applied your face could be compared to how you applied yourself to everything else in life- strict and neat, and you hated when you had a smudge

You pushed through your makeup bag, searching for a certain lipstick that you are now realizing you left back in Paris.

"that was $20" you sigh, standing up to wander to your moms room. Surely she has something to use, shes always been one to paint her face, she used to let you play "makeover" when you were young, which might be why you love it so much now. It was always enjoyable, even if you made her look like a clown a bit.

You wondered where she would keep her makeup, as it wasnt in her bathroom. A quick scan around the room brought you over to her vanity drawers.

"ahh, there we go" you happily looked at all of the collective lipsticks and palettes sprawled out in front of you. You grasped a few of them to look for one you would use, when your eyes fell onto a folder underneath all it.

Pulling it out and carefully looking inside, because you were snoopy even with your mothers belongings, you saw what appeared to be a booklet of Polaroid photos.

You giggled softly at the cute older photos of your mom when she was younger, the silly gestures in the photos reminded you that she too is human and has her own emotions.

You came across a specific one in the pile where your mom was looking out the window in her old apartment, obviously pregnant.

that was you.

Smiling softly, you slid through the last bits before picking up one that made your breath hitch.

Your dad.

She still kept every photo. Hidden.

Photos of your dad sitting on the deck of the house with newborn you resting on his chest, photos of him not knowing your mom was even there while he did tiny activities, like fixing or repainting something.

It was so real and so raw, and you wanted to criticize your mother for keeping all of these, because as you looked at his face, you felt nothing but anger.

But you had to remember she spent a majority of her life with him...she had a kid with him....and you almost felt a sense of sympathy for her and the life she thought she would have with him.

He ruined so many things and even after all of that, she cant toss the photos.

Its never really over, huh?

-

You knew deep down that you should've respected your moms privacy and left the room, considering you were only on the look for a lipstick.

But you found yourself still digging an hour later, looking at photos and notes and everything in between. In a way, you felt like the snooping mom looking into her daughters room.

Perhaps you shouldnt have, but you took one of the photos and kept it for yourself. It was of your mom, she had to have been your age in it, and she was standing in front of the old ice cream place she always took you to before it got demolished.

She looked so happy and pure, she had that gleam in her eyes that you struggle to find in her nowadays.

You put the photo into your bag, making sure it was flat and not bent.

With any lesson learnt from your parents, its that your biggest fear is to spend your life in the wrong situation, trying to make it work only for it to end up as the opposite, and leave you with a broken heart.

But on the other hand, you also realize that you dont want to be like your mom, although you admire and adore her, you want to find your place so desperately, and not let any opportunity go to waste.

The doorbell downstairs rang, startling you a little as you rose to your feet, trying to head down quickly.

"coming!" you shout, your bare feet leading you to the locked door. You open it and see a young man with a pizza in his hand. "oh!"

He bows his head polietly, "Hi, pizza for Y/N?"

You almost laugh, "ah...I didnt order anything?"

you thought for a moment and considered that your mother probably ordered it for you, knowing that your choice of meal this morning was crackers and cream cheese.

"its already paid for" he spoke again

"im sorry but-" you sigh "okay....thanks?" you reach out, almost burning your hands at how warm the box was. You dropped it off on the kitchen counter and looked at it.

It was cheese and bacon, your favorite, how did your mom know that?

"should I trust this?" you looked down at the cat crawling over your feet, she smelled the yummy food just above and was trying to access it.

Before you could grab your phone to call her, you heard the doorbell ring again. "seriously...?"

once more, your feet dashed you over as you opened the door, assuming it would be another delivery. You dropped your phone onto the floor as the person standing in front of you turned around.

"I hope you are open to sharing that pizza" Taehyung spoke quietly, a small smile on his face.

"what are you doing here....?" you looked at him like a deer in headlights; scared, relieved, shocked, happy all in one.

He calmed his expression and stepped a bit closer, "can I come in?"

You stepped back and thought for a moment

"please....?" he persisted

"y-yeah..yeah come in" you stepped away and watched him slowly enter the house, taking his shoes off before turning back to you. He didnt have a moment to speak before you threw yourself into his chest, wrapping him up into a tight hug.

His arms snaked around you, pulling you closer as both of your breathing became uneven.

"i-im so sorry...i missed you a lot and I havent texted and, fuck, youre here and im so-"

"shhh...shhh" his hand held your nape as you looked at you, forehead against yours, "dont apologize its okay"

"but-"

"no...lets just go sit down and talk" he whispered, rubbing your back.

You exhaled shakily "okay"

You led him over to the kitchen, still in absolute shock at the fact he is here with you right now. All of the guilt began to seep back in the moment you saw his face.

You took a seat at the counter and looked at him, the sun peaking in through the blinds, leaving stray lines of orange through the room.

He smiled and looked around, pulling the seat out next to you as he sat down.

"So.." you looked at him, swallowing harshly. "wh-"

"your mom called me" he spoke honestly, sitting down and shielding the sun with his hand. "I was worried sick about you, I cant lie"

Yep. Guilt.

"and I didnt wanna bother you, but she called me and said that you wanted to see me so..." he smirked a little, looking down.

You sigh loudly, "oh tae.....i never told her to tell you to come...."

He laughed, throwing his head back "ah I figured sort of...I knew you would have probably texted me yourself"

You nod, stomach fluttering at the sound of his amusement. "yeah..'m sorry for not texting, that was really shitty of me Tae"

"dont apologize, youve gone through a lot, I understand its not easy to jump back in yet...and thats okay." he whispered "but...how are you? what are you feeling?"

"right now? im....im honestly really happy you showed up...."

"yeah?"

You nod, "mhm, i, er, missed you" you fumbled with your words, not wanting to sound needy or desperate.

"I missed you too" his response was quick.

you both looked at eachother for a few moments silently, before you spoke up, "you ordered that pizza, didnt you?"

He began to laugh, "yeah I did"

"I knew my mom wouldnt know I liked bacon...." you giggled, he moved a little closer and smiled.

"and listen, im not here to course you to coming back to Busan, I just wanted to come check on you...because you know I love you always"

You felt your face heat up, "I know...I know tae, I love you too."

"how are you physically?" he spoke quietly

Shrugging, you answered truthfully, "I think Im okay....my body is beginning to go back to normal, so....."

"good, thats good" he nods

"mhm...im glad I have my mom, but I really did miss having you nearby, and I know you dont want to hear it but I have to say it" you mumbled

"you can talk, y/n"

"im so sorry...for everything....its not fair-"

"but-"

"just listen please, its not fair...what I did to you, and I shouldnt have left, that was so shitty to leave you back in Paris knowing you were hurting too"

His face softened

"and what I did has been haunting me so much that I was afraid to contact you in fears you resented me....in fears that perhaps you hated me now-" your voice choked

"y/n, no, no," he grabbed your hands, "I could never hate you....never ever" he whispered moving to see your eyes, "listen to me, It was a bad situation, and perhaps we could have done better, yes, but stop apologizing for dealing with grief."

He wiped the tear stain on your cheek, holding your face close to his, whispering, "does your mom still have popsicles in the freezer?"

The random question made you laugh, "what?"

"this is serious, y/n, does she?"

"I- I think?" you stood and watched him search, successfully finding them. "why?"

He smirked, "you know why" he grabbed 2 and held your hand, bringing you upstairs to your room, opening the window and climbing out to the ledge of the roof

A place you two always sat during your high school days...with popsicles.

"ohh...." you giggled, now understanding his method to the madness.

"been a longgg time since we sat here, why didnt we do it when we visited a few months ago?" he smiled, opening the wrapper and licking the watermelon pop

"Im not sure..." you opened your own, happy that the sun wasn't directly on you two anymore.

Taehyung laid back against the roof, eyes on you from behind. Its been so long since hes seen you, and with every passing day he grew more impatient.

When he got the phone call from your mom, he knew it was mostly her doing, but he was not about to pass up a free opportunity to see you, even knowing the risk of you despising him was still high.

He wanted to call you beautiful, the way the orange sky illumintaed on your skin, it blended perfectly, it was straight out of a disney Princess movie.

He had no clue as to what label you two stood as, was it okay to call you baby? there was never an official breakup. Was it too much to want to kiss you as soon as he saw your face? his body yearned for you in every way, he missed the feeling of your hand in his and your body on his chest at night.

He missed all of you, and it hasnt even been that long.

"you know..." he began, closing his eyes, "Im starting to think im a bit too dependent on you" his voice was teasing,

"why do you say that?" you looked back at him, licking the popsicle.

He shrugged, smirking, "just cant seem to stay away...."

"i dont understand you" you laugh, looking forward again. "ive been such an ass, Taehyung"

"youre not an ass you just feel things deeply and I love that about you"

"is this some kind of kink?" you joke, watching him laugh

"maybe?"

You shake your head as you continue to eat the pop, "I dont shame"

He looked up at the sky, glaring at a plane flying across. He wondered if you two could be seen from the window.

He wondered how tiny and insignificant you would appear to the passengers aboard, who had no idea what situation you both were dealing with, like how he didnt know what they were dealing with.

Life is weird like that.

What problems you have and seem huge may seem meaningless to others, or how from space, you are the size of a grain of salt. It puts things into perspective, and over the past few weeks, hes been thinking about everything deeply and truly....deciding that although it may change nothing, seeing you was the best option.

"Tae?" you spoke, noticing how quiet he got

"remember when we were 16 and it was Easter? My family was over with yours, and you and I climbed up here after dinner and tried to smoke my dads cigarettes for the first time?" he laughed at the memory

You smile, "I smoked it wrong and began to choke"

You both were giggling again now

"you almost swallowed it, how does one fuck up smoking so badly?"

You nudge him, "hey!"

He shrugged, still smiling

"you are quite the smoker yourself now, huh?"

"I grew up with him smoking so yeah, I sort of picked up on it"

You nod, listening

"you hate it though, right?" he smirked

"well you are a grown man, you can chose to do as you please"

"oh cmon dont play coy, you know you would never give up a chance to scold me for it"

"yeah youre right" you sigh at his knowingness "I worry about your lungs!" you tease

"my lungs are okay" he smiled as you laid down on the roof next to him, the sun casting both of your shadows behind you.

"you dont know that!"

"trust baby, if anything was wrong youd be the first to know"

You froze after he called you baby, it wasn't like you two had been gone for years, but neither of you had been lovey in over a month, it felt almost foreign, almost wrong.

He wasnt going to apologize, it did slip, but did he regret it?

nope.

His eyes scanned over yours, softly and lovingly as he moved his hand over your hair, pushing it out of your eyes.

You stared at him, an expression reading shock. He pulled away slightly

"am I making you uncomfortable?" he seemed worried that he stepped too far, scaring you.

"n-no!" you spoke, reaching for his hand. "it just feels odd you know? its not you, its just...."

"been a while" he finished for you

"yeah..."

You still felt safe with him, how could you not?

You didnt want him to make the assumption that you were not okay with his touch anymore, because that definitely was not the case.

You slowly cuddled closer to him, both of you laid on your backs as your head rested on his shoulder, his head leaning against yours.

Both of your lips were painted pink and red from the popsicles, it made you smile.

The sky above you two seemed so big, so endless.

Staring at it was almost frightening.

You reached for his hand and intertwined his fingers with yours, he quickly squeezed yours out of affection.

"ahh..." he spoke up suddenly, voice quiet. "I shouldnt.....I shouldnt have taken you to Paris"

You looked up at him

"maybe the plane ride was too much? maybe your body couldnt handle the stress?" he exhaled shakily, eyes still up at the sky. "Im sorry...I really am"

"you dont have to apologize for anything" you turned your body on your side so you faced him, though he still wouldn't look at you.

"hey.." you tried again, "you know, my mom told me she also miscarried when I was 3 years old...and thats why she never had kids after me"

He closed his eyes, squeezing your hand

"So I guess its runs in the family.....not our fault" you shrugged, "Its breaks my heart but...we dont have to blame ourselves"

He turned his head to your finally at the sound of your voice cracking, He brought you closer to his chest, hand rubbing your back. Taehyung swallowed harshly, clearing his throat to talk quietly "I've been...having a hard time dealing with it.

You rested your hand on his chest, looking at him sympathetically. His eyes were now watery, it took a lot to not cry yourself.

Youve already cried.

Youve cried so much

Perhaps you were now accepting the miscarriage for what it was, you were even able to say it aloud now, and thats growth.

You wished the same for Taehyung.

"that's okay, too" you whisper, hand snaking around to brush his hair between your fingers behind his head.

His eyes went back up to the now purple sky, tears reflecting the image in front of you. "do you think they are up there?" he smiled softly, rubbing your back still.

You look up at the sky, the clouds creating a beautiful set up as the sun set behind them. The world felt blanketed and secured in this moment, almost safe.

"yeah" you whisper, squeezing his hand, "but they are also here...with us, you know?"

He looks at you, tear marks on his face as you move to wipe them with your sleeve. "I think we will always be parents, that cant change. I feel that connection so deeply, and I know you do too. They arent gone, they just arent in this world" you add.

Taehyung smiled softly at your words, nodding slowly, "yeah....yeah youre right"

His thumb runs over your knuckles, calming you both down.

"I cant get myself to get rid of anything...like the stuff we bought." you mumble, looking down at your hands.

He chuckled, "mmh, you dont have too."

You sighed and looked at him again, a warm blush coating your cheeks.

"you know...I dont give you enough credit" he spoke "youve been through so much"

"Tae..." you brush his hair back, "youve given me everything....we need to look ahead...the past cant be changed."

He slides his hand under the hem of your shirt, touching the soft skin on your hip bone. It wasn't promiscuous or anything, simply an act of love and affection, silently showing you he's here and is listening.

"Im really sad" he choked out

You hugged him close as he began to cry into your shoulder

"its okay baby, its okay....its okay to be sad, you dont have to be strong for me" your hand caressed his back. "I love you so much, please know that"

He took a moment to calm down before pulling back to look at you, "y-youre right....we do need to look forward now"

You nod softly, holding his face.

You were a little worried to see him in this state, you didnt know he was feeling this and keeping it down for so long.

All you could do was comfort him and be there.

"I just.....are we still...." he trailed off, making you smile as you cupped his face again, brushing your thumbs over his cheeks lovingly.

"mm" you slowly leaned forward to kiss him

It was a nice kiss, not too slow but not too fast, just what was needed after a month of distance and no contact.

He blushed brightly, holding you as he whispered, "do you think we could start over? I really want to treat you right, and I want this to work. We can work it out right? the correct way this time?" his voice wavered

You nodded, still looking at him "yes....we can try again, the right way" you giggled as he leaned forward to kiss you again, this time a little quicker.

He bit your bottom lip, hands gently squeezing your hips

"baby-" you exhaled into his mouth, gently pulling back to look at him. "maybe we shouldnt"

"why?" he frowned, almost looking like a little kid

"well for starters we are on my roof" you giggled, sitting up

Taehyung smiled and looked around

"and....I dont know...sex is what brought us this mess" you teasingly nudged him, making him laugh. "lets just be with eachother for a little bit and let our feelings lead us to what happens"

He sighed, knowing you were right. "okay....can I still cuddle you though?" he whispered, making you coo at his cuteness.

"of course, lets go"

You slowly led him back into your room off the roof, closing the window before settling down on the bed with him. "when are you going back to Busan?"

He held you, face hidden in your neck "maybe in a few days...I dont want to leave you yet if thats okay"

"okay...thats fine, but, I think I'll head back with you...."

He smiled, rubbing your back "yeah?"

"mm" you kissed his head, closing your eyes.

You were still healing. To say you fully recovered was not true, but as you sat in his arms things felt normal again, even if it would be temporary.

Perhaps you needed to be with him to fully heal, to fully be yourself. Taehyung was your other half, and he knew you better than anyone. To give this another chance is like a breath of fresh air.

Putting your pasts behind you in hopes of feeling happiness again, in hopes of both of you becoming better people for each other.

Taehyung doesnt want to leave you, ever, and you cant say you want him to.

You dont spend half of your life with someone then let them run away just because things go downhill.

If your father was in your presence, you would teach him this lesson.

When you love someone, you hold their hand and walk through hard times together, you dont let them leave over something that both of you know you would need eachother's support for. To think- you almost let him out of your grasp, you almost lost him.

And Taehyung loved you so much...that if you asked him to leave....he would have.

You dont know what the future entails, and yes, its fucking terrifying. Life is scary, theres ups and downs, and suprises and failure, but theres also a lot of love, and happiness, and success if you look hard enough.

You do hope one thing for sure, and thats that he will be at your side as you grow up, to be there when you are right and wrong, healthy or sick, happy or sad.

As you both began to pick up the pieces of what was broken, you appreciated the past, knowing you had to let it go, but it also brought you here, back into where you feel most safe.

You renovated the apartment and turned the Nursery into a craft room for Taehyungs painting. He kept all of the baby belongings in the closet, hoping for the day in the future when he would open it again and feel that sense of excitement but nervousness.

You continued work and college classes, pursuing your acting career that youve always wanted, and when you graduated, Taehyung would never let you forget how much he admired you.

He kissed your neck softly, his hand pressed into yours as he hovered above you, "so beautiful, my love...."

you bit your lip before exhaling a shaky moan "ohh..f-fuck"

"so smart....youre so perfect baby, I love you"

He kissed you gently, still moving his hips against yours as you held him close to you, fluttering your eyes shut.

things had settled into place once again.

Taehyung got offered a job as an art teacher at the college you graduated from, taking the full time position while you worked at the local theatre, producing and preforming sold out plays every weekend.

The saving money part was hard for him, he wanted to buy you anything you laid your eyes on.

"did you seriously buy the couch?!" you tossed your bag, running from the doorway to the living room to see the grey couch you had pointed out shopping with him literally the day prior.

He shrugged, "yeah...whats the big deal?"

"taehyung!" you giggled and hugged him.

He was too spontaneous for his own good.

A few years passed, and looking at your current life now, you would not believe how much had changed. You can say for the first time in a while you felt happy...and oh what an exciting and freeing feeling that was.

"I love youuuu! my baby!!!!!" taehyung danced around on the icy sidewalk outside of your apartment door, it was new years eve and he was drunk.

very...very drunk.

He pointed at you as he sang, "my babyyyy! woo!"

You giggled, sitting on the steps and recording your man child boyfriend whom you loved so much. "baby be careful dont sl-"

too late.

He fell on his ass, laughing so hard he almost puked, which of course made you laugh too.

"cmon ya big baby" you ran over and helped him inside. Midnight had already passed earlier, pre-drunk taehyung had danced with you around the living room, gifting you a small kiss once the clock read midnight.

"hm, I dont get it, whats so different about a new years kiss? its like every other one?" you laughed after his lips left yours.

"well its special because I get to be the first to kiss you in the new year" he smiled cheekily

"tae...your the only one who gets to kiss me any year" you point at him

"damn right" he snaps his fingers at you as he walks past into the other room.

Every holiday you spent with him felt special, every event, every grocery run, it all felt so much more authentic now.

You two were in your mid twenties now, and a lot of mental growth had come along with that. With pride, you can say you were better people than before, and thats why things worked so well.

You could easily live like this forever.....

it was basically an endless sleepover with your best friend. You were okay if you could come home and see his face waiting for you on the couch.

Your sweet boy.

You had no idea what was gonna happen next, whether that was marriage, or another attempt at having kids- you felt ready.

Ready to give him anything he wanted in return for him saving you.

You could do anything, be anywhere or anyone, in good or bad conditions, and you will still only crave him.

Your lover.

You want him for months

for years

for eternity...

For Forever And A Day.

And God knows he felt the same.

-

A/N- wow guys....this is it....I cannot thank you enough for reading my first story on here, im not perfect at writing but you guys keep me motivated and confident in my work, and I love you for that. This will not be the end of this couple, we still have the Epilogue as well as eventual drabbles.

You guys are amazing. ily.

-Nini

taglist-

@turnthepageandbeburnt @taebangtanbabe @borahaexoxo @lelefoodlover @tan-veee

[whenim64]

jonesmith analysis ep 16-30 (part 2)

this one is somehow longer and sillier than the last one. be ready

episode 16... rough episode but it gives.

lots of Davy being grabby and touchy in this one.

waist touch scene he does it twice btw and I dont fault him bc Mike does have a very grabbable waist.

Mike completely overshooting how short Davy is so that he can be eye level with his boobs.

this awkward high-five thing Mike tries to do.

ep 17 love this ep it gave us Mike grabbing Davy's inner thigh and Davy's shirt riding up.

this frame where it looks like they just got interrupted while making out. the way this ep was a jolenzmith spa day (poor Peter deserves a spa day too).

REMEMBER ALWAYS USE PROTECTION‼️

ep 18

the scene where they're all watching tv and Mike says "This isn’t bad considering, is it, Davy?" plays very well into my headcanon that they like to watch old silly movies together. also this:

ep 19 not much to say here, Mike does come out of Davy and Peter's room at the beginning so im curious what he was doing, and then theres this scene of Davy making a silly face at Mike.

ep 20 yeahh baby

"you'll do fine, sugar." <- this line put me into a coma.

love how he just walks into the group of interviewers and grabs Davy by the scruff.

THIS SCENE where he literally lifts Davy and then sets him on his lap. love love love

ALSO THIS SCENE. it's so sweet 🥹 "youre gentle youre kind and youre sincere" wahhhhh

ep 21 this episode back to back with the last one ohh boy

Mike calling Davy "Mr. Charm" cute.

another "I'm gonna stay here with Davy, you two go back to the pad." split-up situation. cant leave his bf all alone when he has to pretend to be the ruler of a country. Mike also spends the whole episode fussing over Davy and fixing his clothes 🤭 gifs here.

also this was a fake royalty red-blue joint slay outfit moment

ep 22

"MIIIIKEEE! MIKE! That guy was throwing knives at me he couldve killed me why didnt you do something?!!"

the way Mike runs his hands over him to check if hes okay.

ep 24

"what we wanna do is show what you are and the way you live" "what you wanna get us arrested?" because they live a faggot life style full of gay sex.

also "The Monkees are the typical fun people. The devoon madcap boys for whom every day is just one gay adventure." not jonesmith specific but its funny to me and i think it aged splendidly.

not much else in this ep but i do love these frames

ep 26 this one has A LOT

as pointed out HERE Mike just had to put his hand on Davy's hip for a second hmm.

very touchy in this ep

a wonderful array of silly costumes

boob touch ^

another lovely scene of Davy calling out to Mike for help 🫶

ep 27 shirt rip scene.

^ love these frames especially the second one cause Mike looks so cute. Davy is thinking that too.

ep 29

ep 30 didn't really have anything BUT this behind the scenes photo that looks like the beginning of a porno was from this episode

[tabbyrocks]

odd mha ships i dont like and why

dabihawks/ hotwings

they hate eachother. dabi tried to kill him, and theres just literally no chemistry between them. if they ever DID get into a realationship it would be horribly unhealthy. also i think dabi is too obsessed with his dad to want a relationship. (hawks idolizing his abuser does not help)

endevorhawks

absolutely not. this is basically a proship due to the 20-30 year age gap and it being abuser x abused. if you like this i hope you get hit by a fucking car you nasty freak.

twicehawks

didn't realize this was a ship untill recently. gross. sure, they were buddy buddy but ONLY because hawks was trying to get info out of him. hawks liked him as a person / thought he was better then the rest of the villans but twice was set in his ways, so it would never work. also hawks like actually killed him.

bakudeku

literally VOMITS oh my god i hate bakudeku. bakugo is horribly written and the ship itself is so unrealistic. bakugo bullied and abused izuku for 10 YEARS STRAIGHT. TEN YEARS. even with bakugo's "character development" its still really bad. the closest i can see them being is pals.

monobaku

i think this might actually be worse then bakudeku on a logistic level. they both DESPISE eachother. bakugo canonly thinks he's the spawn of Satan. please just let enemies be enemies dear lord.

kiribaku

as much as i hate any sort of ship with bakugo involved this might be the most tame one on this list. i just don't like it. bakugo is overly mean to ALL of his friends and they really only have a strong mutual respect for eachother. also he uses him as a human punching bag just because he can harden. keep your hands to yourself bakugo jesus christ,,

todobaku

this one just makes me sad. bakugo doesn't want a single thing to do with todoroki but todoroki is like so heavily autistic that HE GENUENLY THINKS THEY ARE FRIENDS???? like it hurts me to my core please stop talking to bakugo todoroki im begging.

monoma x tamaki (i dont know the shipname for this and i dont care enough to find out)

I can't believe i even have to mention this one but i had a very interesting situation back when i was active on twitter where ALL of my mutuals thought that this shit was morally okay and i had to block all of them. thats a minor x an adult. i thought we established that freshman x seniors is fucking gross what is WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE. "oh but its only a two year age gap-" WRONG!!! its a 2 and a half year age gap. people seem to forget that teenage brains develop really fucking fast that even though the age gap is only 2 and a half years the MATURITY GAP IS HUGE. also, normal fucking 18+ yr olds DO NOT like dating people under 17 (some of them ive talked to, like my brother, said that even 17 is iffy and heavily depends on how mature they are). also, if we completely ignore the age + maturity gap, their personalities clash. tamaki would probably be fucking bat shit terrified of monoma due to how eccentric he is. also they havn't interacted in canon ONCE. this one is also basically a proship.

Bonus:

togachako

I used to hate this ship because i thought it would just be super toxic, but the recent chapters of the manga really won me over. its just the build up to that point was honestly ass, like we went from 20% to 100% WAY too fast.

[saltv2]

KNOCK KNOCK THE HEADCANONS ARE HERE

(More multi)

1. They can all give the nastiest of side eyes (Nerika, Inari, Ian & Goldie)

2. Nerika repeatedly bops Goldie nose if he yaps to much for his own good

3. Got so fed up of all the fur that one of them just got those fur de-shedders for cats to use on Goldie

4. Nerika forces Goldie to shower atleast once every two weeks

5. Inari sometimes dreams that she working on her labs still

6. Ian enjoy reading and collecting comic books in his free time

7. Goldie was first intimated of Ian, and didn’t believe that he’s Inari younger brother

8. Goldie helps around the apartment doing chores

9. Inari collects tech from Goldie’s world, even if its way outdated in her terms, it peaks her interest

10. Nerika pokes people’s eyes with her robotic arm when in combat

11.One time Goldie dreamed of Nerika dying, that he immediately called her up sobbing

12.Ian sometimes feeds the the stray animals

13. Inari has chemical burns

14. The more time Goldie spends in Nerika universe the more chemistry he learns (mostly how to make drugs and explosives)

15. Goldie had a bullet hole in him and didn’t notice until someone from back home pointed it out

16. Nerika and Goldie play the video game pong together sometimes

17. Some of the animatronics are jealous that Goldie gets to experience more than just the pizzeria, Freddy tries to knock some sense to them afterwards

18. Henry has tried on multiple occasions to warn Goldie about Nerika and the outside, those conversations don’t really go anywhere or end well…

(When some girl from the future with history of violence & crime treats more decently than your own kind, am i right?)

19. when Goldie was able to experience the sun again after 10+ years of not being able to, even if it was in another dimension he couldn’t keep himself from crying— also couldn’t see shit for good few minutes, eyes were having trouble adjusting to brightness (Nerika just let him cry it out for a bit)

20. Goldie keeps a taser and pepper spray in his hat for good measure when in the subzone

21. Nerika: pulls up a picture of a bear during a argument, Goldie: screams

22. Inari has really cold hands

23. They’re afraid that one day they will no longer be able to see one other

24. They hang out on Freddy’s roof sometimes

25. Inari is curious and wants to exam Goldie’s powers but holds off from doing anything (knows it’ll probably upset Nerika)

26. Nerika once gifted Goldie a sweater, he only wears at the apartment he knows better than to have on in close proximity of red fox

27. Goldie began reading alot more having excess to more books in the subzone, reads anything he can get his paws on (except for lewd shit, bro all ready got traumatized from the sex talk)

28. Goldie sometimes wished he human so he could better experience things… and maybe not potentially outlive his new human friends.. (that one is a bit of a stretch but yk)

GOSH IF YOU ANSWER THIS IM SORRY FOR THE WALL OF TEXT ALSO HAPPY BIRTHDAY SALT YIPPEEE!

YOU DONT HAVE TO APOLOGIZE FOR ANYTHING I LOVE RECIEVING THESE ALSO THANK YOU YIPPEEE

1-Canon!! Ian would probably look like that one homophobic dog doing it.

2-Canon!! And it annoys goldie so much

3-Canon!! Nerika had probably thought of completely shaving Goldies fur off at one point

5-Canon!! She also tends to pass out at her desk. Sad.

6-Canon!! He likes Invincible :-)

7-Canon!! I don’t think anyone would believe Ian is the youngest in the group, he’s only 18 and Inari is 21

8-Canon!! He believes it’s the best he could do for his new friends :-)

9-Canon!! She either tries to figure out how they’re made, or sell them for higher prices

10-Canon!! And it blinds her enemys, seriously the tips are sharp.

11-Canon!! LMFAO I CAN IMAGINE:

N: what the hell are you calling for it’s midnight- are you okay?!

G: (Ugly sobbing)

12-Canon!! He loves all animals :-)

13-Canon!! It’s on her design in the drawing i made of her doing crack :-)

14-Incorrect, i don’t think goldie would care much for chemistry, and he would probably quit before he goes anywhere

15-Incorrect, if goldie did get a would he would notice, because it would mess the part up.

16-Canon!! She probably introduced him to more games like: mortal kombat and pokemon :-)

17-Canon!!

18-Canon!!

19-Canon!! I imagine seeing a robot cry only intrigued inari more, imagine just bawling your eyes out and some girl only cares about the fact that you can cry.

20-Canon!! And Nerika gifted him a knife just in case.

21-CANON!! But just because it’s funny

22- I honestly think that spending hours creating and working with really hot chemicals have her the warmest hands. So incorrect.

23-Canon!! The thought scares the both of them

24-Canon!!

25-Canon!!

26-Canon!! The sweater probably had a bear on it.

27-Canon!! Ian would sometimes give him his comics

28-Canon!! Just sad.

(Come back soon!!)

[angelwolf985]

finished watching supernatural s1-15 in 3 months! here are my opinions on the finale!

(warning: probably unintelligible, and very ranty) (+ obvious spoiler warning)

episode 18 was fuckin emaculate. genuinly. it was amazing. the one thing i didnt like about it was how it jumped about, same with 19.( i dont blame them for it tho, it makes sense with the story, i just didnt really love it.) 19 was good for the most part and served as a decent ending but was missing castiel and eileen (mention + presence) which sucked but what can you expect yk,,

episode 20. i have. so many issues with episode 20. WHY DID THEY EVEN????? LIKE TWO MENTIONS OF CAS, NO MENTION OF EILEEN, DEAN FUCKING DIEING, SAMS WIG, ???HEAVEN BEING LACKLUSTER???? it was so. just disappointing. cuz it could've been great. the end part of 20 was the only good part (jared and jensen signing off of the show). the show should've ended on 19 tbh. thats how im seeing it anyway. in my mind thats where it ended, but like, with cas and eileen back.

what i really disliked:

deans death. im pretty sure everyone hated that. and the whole like thing of him dying was really,, sorta,, weird? like; why did it go on so long?? did it happen bc he doesnt have god given plot armor anymore or was it just cuz?did jack see it? how did he feel about it? did he care or did he be all omniscient because he became god?? how did he survive that long? logistically? there was a fucking rusty rebar thing IN HIS SPINE (or like RIGHT NEXT TO IT??). WOULD THAT NOT?? PARALYZE?? OR WORSE???. and, im sorry, but i hated the forehead touch. it felt weird man. i get that they were close but,, not that close? even when they were more unhealthily codependent they wouldn't have done that. i think so anyway. i dunno. also. DEAN HAS SHOWN MULTIPLE TIMES AND IM SURE THE WRITERS WERE OVERTLY AWARE THAT DEAN DID NOT WANT TO DIE ON THE JOB. HE WANTED TO RETIRE WITH SAM AND CAS. ALWAYS WANTED THAT. he often said shit like "we're gonna die on the job, draw the short stick, thats just how it is, how its gonna end for us." (mixing quotes from the top of my head so, not exact) which he clearly thought would happen because pessimism but he NEVER wanted that. for HIMSELF or SAM. dean dying in this episode IS A CRITICAL DISSERVICE TO HIS CHARACTER.

sams mystery wife and (non mystery) child. BLURRY FACE WIFE. WHY IS SHE. WHY. also- how did he recover (seemingly) so quickly? i mean- if he really believed dean was gone FOREVER. when death hasnt meant forever in forever, how would he be so okay? idk. also, idk why, but sam having a kid seems very bizzare. could just be me. also. where tf is eileen. is she the blurry face wife? why would they do that if yes? (could be a load or reasons, either way they couldve like, said it was eileen, if it was supposed to,, idk,,,)

one or two mentions of castiel. did the writers just forget his CHARACTER IMPORTANCE?!?!? HES SO IMPORTANT TO THE STORY??? HE GRIPPED DEAN TIGHT AND RAISED HIM FROM PERDITION. HE LOVED DEAN. DEAN (INARGUABLY) LOVED HIM BACK. he (castiel) deserved SO. much better. my friend who has watched spn since she was a baby AGREES WITH ME. i GRRR I GRR I GRRR!!!! cas not being in this episode is such an aggravating disservice to his character. he deserved more. the fans deserved more.

alright im done ranting now. may add more on later. im gonna go rewatch the show and read fix it fics.

[ivy-diaries]

⋮  — ⧉ . . viewing 30 questions in 3 minutes . . . . .

"Hi I'm Ivy and I'm here with buzzfeed to answer 30 questions in 3 minutes !!"

"But like before we begin, if i don't answer it in the given time, do I like get a punishment or something like that ??"

Laughing, the staff shook their head no, she softly laughed, opening the paper the questions were on.

1. "Texting or talking?"

"Both ?? I don't know, I prefer both to be very honest but i dont quite like it when people call me unannounced."

2. "best pickup line you've ever received?"

"Usually i don't get impressed with pick up lines so its really hard to impress me with them but this one truly impressed me. My boyfriend was the one who said it to me on a random night when we were competing to see whos got the better pickup lines because of course we are haha it went something like 'i dont like pickup lines because im not here to pick you up, im here to pin you down' and i went feral haha"

3. "worst pickup line you've got ?"

"No offense but it's got to be 'did it hurt when you fell from the vending machine because youre a snack' its over used im sorry"

4. "Describe your personality in 5 words"

"Funny, creative, day dreamer, perfectionist and kind i guess"

5. "a movie that made you cry?"

"It's not a movie but I cried watching the short film 'elephant whisperers' it won the Oscar too! "

6. "Who's the one artist you wanna collab with ?"

"There are soo many people I wanna collab with, making me choose one person is hard, I'll go with my role model, taylor swift "

7. "Who would play you in the movie of your life ?"

"Myself if possible or maybe Zendaya or Sadie Sink "

8. "Most used emoji ?"

"the cute face one"

9. "if your house is on fire, what are the three things you'd grab ?"

" Okay I hope it never happens but i can't say I haven't thought about this before, and the things are, my dogs, my gadgets and my wallet"

10. " ideal first date"

"museum date because thats here my boyfriendand i went for ours" she smiled.

11. "Last song you listened to?"

"You're on your own kid by Taylorswift" she said taking her phone out to check.

12. "First thing you'd do if you woke up as a guy?"

"Check myself out? I don't know i haven't really thought about it "

13. "Are you single ?"

"Nope, happy in a relationship of almost seven years " she said smiling at the thought of her boyfriend.

14. "Favorite ice cream flavor?"

"I don't know if many people know this but there's this flavor called vanilla elderflower and it tastes like heaven"

15. "Phone lockscreen and homescreen wallpaper ?"

" My lockscreen is a picture of my two doggies and my homescreen is my boyfriend!"

16. "How often do you wash your bedsheets ??"

"I wash them twice a week !! Stay hygienic people !!"

17. "Mom or dad?"

" nope im not answering that"

18. "Most priced possession ?"

"My dogs "

19. "have you done anything illegal?"

"Nope and never will"

20. "your favorite body part of yourself?"

"Umm maybe my eyes?"

21. "Favorite movie character?"

"Probably peter parker yea"

22. "Best advice you've ever received?

"I get a lot of advice day to day from a lot of people and its really hard to just pin point one thing but it probably has to be from my mother 'there's always a better tomorrow' "

23. "Favorite YouTube channel?"

"Hmm probably Stephanie soo because I usually hear her cover true crime cases when I'm preparing dinner or I would probably say mine haha"

24. "A song that always puts you on a good mood ?"

" no matter how low I'm feeling BTS's permission to dance puts me on a good mood!! Other than that, straykids' cheese, tomorrow by together's no rules, there's a lot"

25. "If you could live in only one place for the rest of your life, where would it be ?"

"France for sure but probably like the countryside, I'd probably take my family and friends with me "

26. "A friend that would pick up your call anytime?"

"I'd say the anybody from straykids would pick up if I called"

27. " your most favorite memory?"

"hmm probably when i debuted or when my song hit no.1 on Billboard "

28. " What did you have for breakfast?"

"I had cereal for breakfast "

29. " Favorite hair color?"

" blonde but I wanna try red "

30. " a song you listen to when you're sad?"

"Bang chan's hate to admit or limbo by Lee Know!! Those just break my heart "

"Wait we're done ?? Omg I finished it yayy!!!! Haha"

"And that was me with buzfeed doing the 30 questions in 3 minutes challenge !! Byee!!!"

[mispronouncing-michaelangelo]

fic author interview

tagged by @sunriseverse (lets gooooo)

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

23, which is honestly more then i expected but worlds less then i actually write. i also cleared out a few a few months back so it was a bit more this time last year

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

115,185,,,, sort fics my beloved uwu

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

just gonna post top 3 but its You fuck like a demon (a good omens fic that i dont really like anymore but i dont dislike it enough to take it down), an unrightful claim to the throne (a drawtectives fic that i actually really like about york fighting his brother to the death so that one can be crowned prince) and His body was found days before it was discovered (which is one of my all time fave fics ive written, very in my wheelhouse and very me)

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

i do! and i do because i love and enjoy them and i like engaging! i also feel like it encourages more comments cause readers know i check them

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

its been deleted now but i want to rework it and repost it at some point, but it was an mdzs + dead ringers au where basically post jgy's death, lwj tries to support lxc but they become horrifically co-dependant

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

oh fuck okay so i dont really do happy endings,,, the happiest ending i have is probably Nuptial Flights,,, where they characters end up laying bloody in a field for a bit,, like thats as happy as it gets haha

7. Do you write crossovers?

no crossovers but some au's of other media

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

probably back in like 2012 yeah but not in relevant years haha

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

i have but not alot?? im a classic omegaverse/werewolf girlie when i do though

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

nope! and i hope it stays like that

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

also nope, but i have translated one of my own works as a gift to a friend

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

nope!

13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

all time??? oh fuck this has changed a lot over the years, but i guess i always eventually come back to zuko/katara

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

The re-naming of cats!!! i love this fic so much but ah, how do say, i was deeply traumatised when i wrote it, and have recovered to a point where i legit dont think i can write like i need to to finish it

15. What are your writing strengths?

i have a really specific control of flow in a really stylistic way that i think is probably one of my stronger points

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

dialog. i just,, its hard,,,

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

i dont really have a strong opinion on it aye, as long as its done respectfully and its serving some purpose to your fic i say go for it

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

lotr i think????? maybe?????

19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?

wei wuxian and wen ning,, i just,, i need something fucked up to happen between them haha

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written

probably 'His body was found days before it was discovered'

okay so im gonna tag @wifiwuxians and @raspberrymama but no obligation if you dont want to aye!

[bookishtheaterlover7]

I understand and feel the same issues with age. I see people, and sometimes im like, I feel like I should act older. I always got alowlng with people who were usually older or younger. Sometimes, I feel like I act too young. I dont feel my age i feel like a teenager. College has this way of combining people of various ages both with ine foot in the same life and one foot out . I feel silly sometimes seeing others who have families or are now graduated with careers. But i dont want to feel run down and stuck that im not moving as fast as I should be.

I dont want to feel old I don't want to feel like the world isnt my oyster. I like how I apprached things when I was a teen with open eyes, an open heart, and an open mind. I think that's why i feel young . I dont judge prematurely, and i try and go at things openly,

I think Will and Kate set a new presence since they got married and had kids older. Its no longer a get married and have a family befire your 20s are over even at 29 people aren't focused on that, and I feel like it takes the pressure off. As women yes we have a clock, and it sucks and I want kid, I honestly do. But now isnt the time. Our parents' generation and ours have so many things that seperate us we're living a diffrent age more akin to agriculture turning into the industrial revolution than any other time.

I see celebrities who are in the same age group and it amazes me how they diffrent they look and what they done. I look at people loek SarJo and Britney Spears and I find its amazing what they have done and they look so much older. And I have to remind myself its ok youre not them you're not meant to be exactly like them.

I understand why Miley Cyrus wrote I used to be young. But I dont agree. We are still young. To a 96vyear old a 40nyear old is young

To a 50 year old a 35 year old is young

To a 19 year old and early 20s a 33 year old is someone to look up to thst we set standards to

But look at yourself in your own position. Things must have happened to you that never happened to anyone else, and those changes can be good. Dont be afriad to take longer in school to get your degree

Dont be afraid to start learning a new skill or hobby

It's never too late to try something.

I have to remidn myself that my own journy is mine and taking the shorter path isn't always fun or how its cracked up to be.

We only see hilight reels.

Look at yours no one elses.

After 18 or 21 depending does age really matter when your heart and soul are worth the most weight? Just be a good person regardles if youre 18, 21, 25, 29, 32, 35, 37, 43, 57.... I just want to be a good person and be happy and i think that means accepting how many times i go around the sun doesnt need to dictate how I feel or what I do with my life.

Okay, seriously... How did I stumble upon the accepting people of Tumblr...🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

And also, y'all have officially made me cry 😆

And I'mma share this because honestly, it's beautiful. And I think it's a message people need to hear. I certainly needed to hear it.

Thank you, dear N🫶nnie... 🥹🤗

God, we seriously need more of this positivity around...