#and the biggest one is that drugs tend to be a big problem :(

[applebrooklyn]

India bears a disproportionately large burden of the world's tuberculosis rates, with World Health Organization (WHO) statistics for 2011 giving an estimated incidence figure of 2.2 million cases for India out of a global incidence of 9.6 million cases.

Tuberculosis is one of India's biggest health issues, but what makes this problem even worse is the recent discovery of Totally Drug-Resistant Tuberculosis, TDR-TB. This issue of drug resistance began with MDR-TB, moved to XDR-TB and, as of 2021, has grown to embrace the most dangerous form, TDR-TB.

The cost of this death and disease to the Indian economy between 2006 and 2014 was approximately US$1 billion.

Another major cause for the growth of TB in India has to do with its standing as a developing country. A study of Delhi slums has correlated higher scores on the Human Development Index and high proportions of one-room dwellings tend to correlate with TB at higher rates.[16] Poorly built environments, including hazards in the workplace, poor ventilation, and overcrowded homes have also been found to increase exposure to TB

( Their own living situation is causing them death and suffering, and bad wiring is causing summer fires)

It’s a fun fact and a reality check education hour.

I do agree with you. The world is living through a silent pandemic for years and it's the worst in India. We are struggling with it since pre independence era. The first sanatorium was established in 1905 or 1906, if I remember correctly, and even now, if you go to any of the colder places or hill stations, you will find these delepidated buildings which once used to be a sanatorium. One of them is near my college as well.

In 1951, the GOI launched a mass vaccination program for BCG and in 1962, National Tuberculosis Control Project was launched. As a young nation, we did well. Goverment's efforts were commendable. But soon enough, in late 1970s, we realised BCG vaccine isn't exactly working. This should have prompted the government to take an action, but nothing happened. Although, I would like to add here that some say that some data was lost between 1978-1979 (if my memory serves me right) and if we took that in account, the vaccine was working just fine. I would leave this to your discretion.

The world then saw the emergence of HIV in 1984. We too had cases of HIV infection. We did not knew until 1986. Until then, many were infected with HIV and TB was it's most common secondary infection. In 1992, we reported our first MDR TB case as well.

So we were in a hot soup. No vaccine, HIV, increasing population, recession, political upheaval, communication gap between the government and the masses, poor sanitation, lack of knowledge in public, MDR.

In 1993, TB was declared a global emergency and in the same year, Revised NTCP was piloted. We had our objectives clear—85% cure rate and 70% detection rates. And we did it. The catch—it took us 13 years!

Now, time is an asset. Even more so in the case of Mycobacterium tuberculosis. There is a whole catalogue of 17000 mutations which may lead to multi drug resistance. Bacteria are quick to reproduce and respond. They are exceptional at defence and time constraints are tight. Safe to say, the devil works fast, but bacteria work faster. Sadly, we did not realise it at that time. In 2012, we then encountered a rather strange strain that was resistant to all the first line and second line drugs—the TDR strain. As if MDR-TB wasn't a nuisance enough. The MDR-TB treatment has a success rate of only 54%. WHO reported roughly 3.4 lakh deaths due to TB in India in 2022 and 1.1 lakh were due to MDR-TB. We had record TB cases in 2023.

But yes, we are working on it. We are a big country with a big population. Population burden is always going to be an issue. We can't run from it. We are working on sanitation, it is taking time, but it will hopefully happen in its due course. In 2023, we became the first country to make a mathematical model to estimate the cases of tuberculosis. According to that, there was an 11 % reduction in the case of TB in 2022 as compared to 2023.

Government has launched NSP for Tuberculosis elimination (2017-2025). We have NiKshay ecosystem (under which the mathematical model has been developed), we have Nikshay poshan Yojana for financial support of TB patients. The scientists are doing their due. Two vaccines are under phase 3 clinical trials. Drugs are being developed. Rifampicin derivatives, BDQ, Delaminid etc.

So yeah, it's an uphill battle and we have made many mistakes. But if all of us do our respective parts, we still have a chance to overcome it.

[emophilzablr]

Here she is, BPD analysis.

— Disclaimer: I am not a professional, I did study psychology for most of my life and my credentials to this is simply the fact that I am BPD as well. I also want to highlight that these symptoms can also be AUTISM! And that maybe that is even more relatable to him, though, you can have both, because they really tend to coexist

Here are the symptoms of BPD, and either if he shows them or not, or if its believed he does. Remembering you don't need to have all of them, you need to fit the criteria, of some specific ones, that differentiate BPD from disorders like Bipolar and depression, and they all overlap with Autism which causes a confusion in diagnosis.

• Fear of rejection and abandonment: He keeps count of every time he was rejected, his biggest struggle in life was with the fact that Amelia rejected him, replaced him, and abandoned him, he has been in the loop of this trauma for years, it never leaves him, because that's his biggest fear coming true. His fear of boringness or of being mediocre is also in this, he wants to overcompensate so people don't reject or leave him again. Also, this symptom comes with a pattern that is very very common in this symptom, leaving first, losing interest after the chase, people with BPD leave first to not get abandoned.

• Intense and unstable relationships: We know that his romantic relationships are always like this, incredibly intense at first and then it dies out or they leave or he leaves, and they tend to be unstable while it was happening, especially with Amelia, it was incredibly unstable and toxic for both.

• 8/80 relationships, going from intense love to nothing or to hatred: It seems like most of them have this, a big start, and a terrible ending, either it going to nothing or strong resentment (Amelia's case) It also has a part of this not talked, that after this hatred passes, BPD people tend to come back, and, blame themselves which well, next symptom.

• Villain complex: Most BPD people experience this, seeing themselves as absolute horrible monsters, most of his songs make him the villain, he really highlights like hey i'm a horrible person, and this is very, very common. I think funnily enough, C!Wilbur is a perfect demonstration of this part of him, it's a self insert of the Villain he makes himself to be.

• Constant changes in personality: We have seen this, even as a streamer, in a place he was never truly himself, he's always changing completely who he is, even though it's a character. I also feel that the fact that he has so many characters that are all clearly self inserts is a way to express this self image issue he has, going on a limb here but you get it. He also seems to struggle with his appearance and self image and tends to become a sponge when with others.

• Impulsive behavior: So this is many factors, getting from the internet straight up “Impulsive and risky behavior, such as gambling, reckless driving, unsafe sex, spending sprees, binge eating or drug abuse, or sabotaging success by suddenly quitting a good job or ending a positive relationship” He does a bunch of those, he did have a problem with abusing alcohol, most of us believe he did that with coke as well, we know that he impulsively drops all his responsibilities and doesn't keep up his promises, that he's constantly moving, constantly dropping and then coming back to it, that he can be super excited for something and then suddenly not be anymore, he's always ruining his relationships even though some of them are good just because he found something more exciting. He has binge eaten too but I don't know if that is something he always does.

• Self harm/Suicidal tendencies: He shows few of these, some of his songs imply that he was in a mental state that this could happen, what we know is that he did punch a window, accidentally he says, but we don't know, I think his form of self harm is self sabotage.

• Paranoia: This is something that is not spoken much about BPD but I think even his hypochondria could be a symptom since BPD is very prone to paranoia, and his is based on his health, he thinks he's dying literally all the time, that he's sick and that he has something, this is pure paranoid behavior.

• Mood swings: We don't know if he has many, we do know he has Bipolar signs in this, expressing more stages of depression and mania, but he also has constant anxiety problems, which can all be part of this symptom in specific.

• Emptiness: Another one that is incredibly necessary, and we know this is his main affliction most times, he feels apathetic all the fucking time, it's his favorite word in music, he shows this idea that he's incapable of loving too that is part of this emptiness, he thinks he doesn't feel anything because there's nothing inside him type of thing.

• Anger: This is inconclusive, it is to believe that when he was younger he was a very angry person, we don't know if that's still there, but, we know it was a problem at some point.

[shoechoe]

Last night, I finished reading Purple Haze Feedback. It was a lot shorter of a read than I was expecting it to be; I probably could've sped through it a lot faster if I didn't limit myself to just reading a chapter or two a day. Despite that, I can definitely see why so many people are obsessed with it; it does a lot in a relatively short amount of time. So, now that I'm finished with it, I'm going to give my overall thoughts of the novel. This will be fairly off-the-cuff, so sorry if it's a bit messy.

I think expanding on and giving a sense of closure to Fugo's character was the main purpose of this novel, and it accomplishes this goal extremely well. Fugo falling off the face of the earth was one of my big criticisms with Vento Aureo- I enjoy the concept of a character that's usually intelligent and level-headed but has an anger problem that renders them totally irrational when set off, but the manga just doesn't do anything with that concept. Because of that, I think a novel focusing on Fugo and where he went after he separated from the group was well-warranted.

I adore what Purple Haze Feedback does with Fugo's character. It explores his sense of regret for leaving the group and having his comrades die without him, he thinks about his actions and his thought processes that led him to this point, it expands upon his backstory that was relegated to just a sentence or two of dialogue in the original manga, and it gives him a character arc as he's made to go on a mission to prove his trustworthiness to the organization and he gains courage and strength he never had before. The second-to-last chapter where he thinks about Narancia and finally has the same breakthrough of why he was so willing to risk his life for a girl he barely met gave me chills down my spine.

Fugo is made into a genuinely great character in Purple Haze Feedback- I can absolutely see his appeal now. To avoid being overly wordy, he feels completed in this novel, and that's really what I wanted to see.

The things going on in the novel outside of Fugo are also interesting. The narcotics team served as the antagonists while also giving more insight onto the way Passione worked before Giorno became the Boss and also functioning as Fugo's "test".

The fights surprised me with how quick they were, but Jojo fights tend to get tedious for me with how dragged out they get, so that's not really a complaint. I imagine translating the manga's style of fights to novel format would be difficult, so I don't blame the fights of the novel for feeling a lot different than typical Jojo fights. A lot of the descriptions of the Stand abilities and the gore actually made me squirm a bit- particularly, Vittorio succumbing to his own Dolly Dagger and Sheila's vocal coords being controlled by Manic Depression were scenes that stood out to me.

As for all of the new characters, I definitely liked quite a few of them. I can't say I cared too much about Murolo himself, but I certainly liked his Stand ability. (Though I'm still a little unclear on how he managed to survive the helicopter crash...? Maybe I just missed something, though.) Sheila E. was a really good character; I loved her ability and her personality. At the same time, she reminded me maybe a little too much of Trish; she wasn't just a clone of her, but one of the biggest roles Sheila plays is to be paralleled with Trish, and I would've liked to see her do more, especially since she's supposed to be a skilled member of Passione instead of the innocent girl that Trish was. Her backstory with her sister Clara was also a little weak.

I felt as though the plot was also less than perfect. The ordeal with the Stone Mask kind of went nowhere- so did Volpe's powerup and desire to transcend his humanity in the final fight. That was the one moment where I felt as though the fight could've been aided by being longer.

The additions to Passione's past, on one hand, made a ton of sense (of course Diavolo pretended to be fighting the drug trade just so he could set up the market for his own drugs- of course he claimed to fight older organizations to gain the trust of his members- Jesus, why wasn't this in the manga?) but on the other, kind of just exacerbated the problems I already had with the original story (why are we still hyperfocusing on how the drug trade is evil and bad when we know that Passione was also doing several other things that would hurt the innocent, including directly murdering children? Also, once again, if Bruno has such a soft spot for kids, why was he okay with torture-interrogating and then attempting to murder Giorno, a middle school boy?)

The part of the novel that I have mixed feelings on the most has to be the way Giorno is treated. He doesn't actually appear until the very last chapter, but until then, he's built up by the characters to be this almost saintly figure that can read everyone perfectly and always makes the right decisions. I understand he's already compared to Jesus in the manga, but PHF feels especially over-the-top with it, comparing his voice to a pipe organ played at church and having Fugo literally bow down to him in the end.

To be brutally honest, for me, Giorno already feels like he has a sanctimonious air to him despite not even really being a good person himself, and in the manga, he really straddles the line between being interestingly set in his flawed beliefs and just being annoying. Seeing all of the characters revering him like this does make me roll my eyes a little. To be charitable, it does make sense that a bunch of criminals with no other hope would turn to their leader and see him as someone to look up to, even if the reality is that he is far from an angel himself, but I find it unclear if that was what the novel was going for. Still, though, this is far from a story-ruiner and the last scene with Fugo swearing his loyalty to Giorno was wonderful.

Overall, I really enjoyed Purple Haze Feedback. I think it's a wonderful addition to canon, and while it doesn't fix all of my problems, I would absolutely recommend reading it. I'm mostly kind of mad at myself for not doing this sooner.

[weldfists]

Indie ask/RP blog for Sett the Boss from League of Legends & Riot Games Selective | 21+ | Multi-fandom | Low Activity | Penned by Alfio

Anyone wants a piece of me, line forms right here.

Promo - Rules - Dossier - Headcanons - Memes - Verses

Mobile friendly rules under the cut.

-THIS blog can and will contain triggering material! Please follow at your own discretion!! I tag everything as best as I can and I’m hoping I can make this a comfortable experience for everyone. Some topics explored include but not limited to: PTSD, Familial Trauma, Abandonment Issues, Substance Abuse, Anger Issues, Anxiety, etc.

- ABSOLUTELY no God-modding/metagaming, the usual don’t be that person spiel you know. Also don’t be racist, homophobic, transphobic, ableist, etc. Like for real it’ll be the fastest block you’ve ever seen.

- SEND me an ask or IM me if you’d like to start a thread! I’m not the best at plotting because I tend to be very vague but I’ll certainly try my best! Random interactions are fine as well too, I’d just prefer if you tagged me in a post instead of sending an ask for this one (doesn’t apply to inbox memes). I also don’t do welcome posts, but if you make one for me I’d be happy to respond!

- THAT being said I have the right to say no to certain plots/threads without a reason, most of the time though I might provide a reason. If I say no it doesn’t mean I don’t want to RP with you at all, just hit me with a few more ideas and we could figure something out!

- DUPLICATES are more than welcome! I have no problem with duplicates of muses I already RP with or even other Setts. I really enjoy reading everyone's unique take on their muses so the more the merrier!

- MAINS/EXCLUSIVES are something that I can practice if that's the preference of my role play partner. I'm not one to go out of my way to ask for this sort of thing though!

- THIS blog is multiship (each ship happening in it’s own universe) and I work with chemistry. But, I have a very big affinity towards Aphelios/Sett and Ezreal/Sett.

- AU’S and crossovers are totally cool with me! In fact I love ‘em. This also means I’m multi-fandom, yes! Just let me familiarize myself with your fandom for a bit while we plot.

- THREADS can be dropped if asked or even just dropped outright without any notification, I understand. I’ll probably also drop some threads too because sometimes I just can’t seem to muster up enough of my muse to continue ‘em but usually I’ll let you know!

- NSFW content can sometimes come up on this blog. More explicitly sexual content will be done under a read more. Sometimes I might push to a fade to black situation but I do want to get better at writing certain things. so I might try my hand at getting a little bit out of my comfort zone. That doesn’t mean I won’t let you know when I want a certain type of interaction to wrap up in a “fade to black” type of way. Depictions of violence/gore/drug use are a-okay and everything will be tagged accordingly.

- IF you want to continue an ask as a thread please move it to it’s own text post and tag me in it! It’s a lot easier to thread that way for me.

- MUN info: Hi I'm Alfio o/ I'm 26 and go by They/It pronouns. I'm the biggest thembo you'll ever meet and I'm full of heart and dumb of ass.

last updated. 6/23/2024

[belethlegwen]

For the g/t asks! I’m wanted to ask you about number 4, 9, aaaand 16. :)

Thanks so much for the asks!!

4 Do you have a sona? Tell us about them!

The closest I feel to a sona would be Melanie, she's the one that I'm filtering a lot of my personal emotional processing through (though I do that through all of my characters in some way or another) the most intensely. A lot of the things she's gone through in the narrative are things that I have I gone through similarly, or am worried I'm going to go through sooner than I would like (my father is very much still alive and very dear to me, but I lost a step-father and a step-brother in the last two years so mortality of people I love has been on my mind a good bit). Otherwise, my sona is pretty basic. If you want to RP with -me-, then I like to be human sized around small folks. For personal reasons I like to be at least in the biggest size-range of the room, it's very rare I want to be tiny around people unless they're extremely close with me and I trust them a lot. I'm handys/touch-feely but also have a ton of anxiety, so that's fun (I am working on all sides of that). I like the idea of handling/holding/touching a smaller person, I just really enjoy the tactile side of things.

9 What's your favourite piece of sizey media?

All time favourite is The Nutcracker Prince, have watched it since I was a child and I ordered the DVD off of Ebay or Amazon shortly after I first moved out, it's one of my favourite Christmas movies and I just... I love it. Nostalgia + everything else, it hits me in an interesting way for sure and always has. I love Arrietty for the art of it, it really does just feel very lived-in and real at moments. Absolutely adore it. The Ted Danson, 1996 adaptation of Gulliver's Travels (specifically part one with Lilliput and Brobdingnag) has some interesting takes and some actually really decent G/t effects of live-action media of that era (particularly for being a TV-geared project) and I watched it a LOT for some mood and perspective reference when I was first diving into writing The Stranding. It's available on YouTube for free if anyone is interested in checking it out. I also own a pocket-sized (well, that was the selling point at least) unabridged copy of Gulliver's Travels and have read the first two parts of that until my eyes have practically fallen out of my skull numerous times. Love it.

16 What's your comfort g/t media/tropes?

Hurt/Comfort is where my heart lies, in a lot of ways. I tend to prefer emotional hurt over physical hurt, there's some media out especially right now that's just... fucking brutal in terms of the pain being caused to characters and with little comfort actually being given to them in comparison. I'm not huge into that. I do however just... love the idea of someone getting used to the idea of being tiny/small, having to adjust to that. Someone who was accidentally shrunk, or winds up in a place where someone their size is not at all the norm, that's my drug. I really really love @adjacentperception's Rose & LaPorte series, Atticus going through it has pulled at my heartstrings more than I thought really possible and I love seeing that poor guy figure things out with the help of amazing friends. We have an RP going involving two scientists and a teleporter mishap that I love, as well, that fits the 'has to adjust to being small with help from someone' niche really well. I love the ingenious ways that people think up accommodations for suddenly-small people, or smart ways a small person would tackle suddenly-huge problems. That's always neat. Also just very into... small person getting rescued in some way by a big person, obviously. That's up my alley. A scared small being helped by a gentle big, trying to navigate such a bizarre and possibly terrifying dynamic. Also VERY into small person trying to take care of a giant person who is sick, hurt, or just... emotionally going through it, y'know?

Hope you liked these answers!! Always willing to answer more :)

[tallmantall]

James Donaldson on Mental Health - How to Help Kids Who Are Lonely

What parents can say to kids who are struggling socially and how they can help Writer: Rachel Ehmke Clinical Experts: Lauren Allerhand, PsyD , Bethany Vibert, PsyD What You'll Learn - What are some reasons why kids might be struggling socially? - How can you find out if your child is lonely? - How can parents help kids who are struggling? - Quick Read - Full Article - Why kids might be struggling socially - How to tell if your child is lonely - What to say (and what not to say) - How to help kids who are struggling socially - How to evaluate screen time Back to Top Quick Read If your child is struggling to make friends, there are ways to help. First, try to figure out why. Some kids need help with social skills. This is common for kids who are immature or have ADHD, autism or non-verbal learning disorder. Other kids are anxious. They may feel overwhelmed in new social situations or big groups. Kids who are depressed often want to stay in their rooms. They may interpret things negatively and doubt others want to see them. Finally, some kids may have a hard time fitting in because they have different interests. If you think your child is lonely, ask them. Start by describing a time when you have felt lonely. If they don’t want to talk, try again in a few days. Don’t push them. If your child says they are lonely, try to be a good listener. Show that you’re listening by reflecting back what they’re saying: “It sounds like you’re having a hard time.” You can also say supportive things like: “That sounds tough. Would you tell me more about that?” Once you know more, you can try to help. For kids who need practice with social skills, you can break things down into small steps. Then you can role play them with your child. For kids who have a hard time putting themselves out there, acknowledge how they feel. Then remind them that they’ll probably have a good time once they’ve made the effort. Give them lots of support and praise for doing something tough. Some kids tend to misunderstand interactions. You can give a reality check: “What makes you think he’s mad? Are there other explanations?” For kids who interpret things negatively a lot, pointing it out each time can help break the pattern. Finally, help kids find a group or activity that is interesting to them. Many kids find success online, where there are lots of virtual groups for kids with specific interests. Getting excited about something will help them feel more confident, too. We all want our children to be socially successful. While they don’t need to be the most popular kid in the class, we do hope that they will have friends. Friendships are one of the biggest sources of fun in a kid’s life, which is reason enough to value them. But they are also critical to development. They lay the groundwork for lifelong skills like listening to others, solving problems and self-expression. They are also an important source of confidence. As kids get older their friendships start playing an even bigger role in their emotional and personal lives. When kids don’t have these relationships, it can have a serious impact on their mood, confidence and functioning. Going to school every day can be a trial. Using social media can be depressing. Kids who are lonely often feel rejected, invisible or like something is wrong with them. And parents watching from the sidelines wonder what they can do to help. #James Donaldson notes:Welcome to the “next chapter” of my life… being a voice and an advocate for #mentalhealthawarenessandsuicideprevention, especially pertaining to our younger generation of students and student-athletes.Getting men to speak up and reach out for help and assistance is one of my passions. Us men need to not suffer in silence or drown our sorrows in alcohol, hang out at bars and strip joints, or get involved with drug use.Having gone through a recent bout of #depression and #suicidalthoughts myself, I realize now, that I can make a huge difference in the lives of so many by sharing my story, and by sharing various resources I come across as I work in this space.  #http://bit.ly/JamesMentalHealthArticleFind out more about the work I do on my 501c3 non-profit foundationwebsite www.yourgiftoflife.org Order your copy of James Donaldson's latest book,#CelebratingYourGiftofLife: From The Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy Link for 40 Habits Signupbit.ly/40HabitsofMentalHealth If you'd like to follow and receive my daily blog in to your inbox, just click on it with Follow It. Here's the link https://follow.it/james-donaldson-s-standing-above-the-crowd-s-blog-a-view-from-above-on-things-that-make-the-world-go-round?action=followPub www.celebratingyourgiftoflife.com Why kids might be struggling socially It hurts when you see that your child isn’t making friends, and you can’t figure out why — or how to help. Here are some potential reasons why a child may be striking out on connecting with other kids: They don’t understand how to socialize. The rules of social interaction might seem obvious to you, but they do need to be learned. And while most kids pick up social cues and patterns so easily it seems automatic, some don’t, and need more support — and practice. This is particularly true for kids with ADHD, autism and non-verbal learning disorder. When one child isn’t understanding their peers’ expectations about how to decide what to play, how to share, when to talk and how to show that they’re listening, they’re going to find it harder to make friends. They’re anxious. It is common for kids — and adults — to feel anxiety when they come into a new social situation or join a group. This shows up in young kids who can’t join in activities on the playground, or at birthday parties that are supposed to be fun but are actually overwhelming. Social anxiety gets more common as kids get older. Some kids with severe social anxiety may be paralyzed with worry that others are judging them. They might weigh every word in a text message and worry so much about how they look or what they say that they stop hanging out with friends. They may be so self-conscious they even stop eating in the school cafeteria. They’re depressed. A major symptom of depression is a tendency to withdraw from others. While they might have fun with friends once they’re hanging out, a kid with depression will first need to be compelled to leave their room. Kids who are depressed are also more likely to interpret things negatively and assume other people don’t want to see them. They don’t “fit in.” For some children, the problem is more environmental. “Something we talk about with some kids is the idea of being a rose in a tulip garden,” says Lauren Allerhand, PsyD, a clinical psychologist at the Child Mind Institute. “So maybe it’s not a lack of skills, but you’re just in an environment where people don’t have the same ideas or interests as you, and you’re just having a real challenge finding your group of people.” They’re immature. Kids may struggle to fit in when they are younger than their classmates or just slower to mature. They might not have developed the same social skills as their peers yet, or they might just have different interests. As kids get older they tend to catch up, but in the meantime they may be feeling confused and lonely. How to tell if your child is lonely When kids spend a lot of time alone, you might suspect they are lonely. But unless they complain that they don’t have friends or are obviously unhappy, parents can be left to wonder how much it’s upsetting them. Kids might not volunteer to discuss it with you. This is particularly the case with teenagers, but kids of all ages might feel some reluctance about admitting how they feel. It can help if you start the conversation by talking about times in your life when you have felt lonely, says Dr. Allerhand. “Sharing a little bit can open the door for kids to express some of what they’re feeling. But I wouldn’t push too hard. If they don’t want to tell you, give it a try again in the next day or two.” Other kids, especially very young children and kids on the spectrum, might not know how to explain what they’re feeling. “For individuals with autism, sometimes communicating their own experiences can be quite challenging. They often can have a hard time linking what they’re feeling and what their experience is with a specific word that others may use for that experience,” says Bethany Vibert, PsyD, a clinical psychologist at the Child Mind Institute. When asked point blank if they are lonely an autistic child might say no, but if you probed a little deeper you might find that they do actually wish they had friends. For kids who are younger or struggle with emotion identification, first teaching what loneliness is can help. Sharing your own experience of feeling lonely is also a good strategy here. Dr. Vibert recommends that you might say something simple like, “When I haven’t been around people for a while, sometimes I want to spend time with somebody. That means I’m feeling lonely.” Dr. Vibert also suggests asking kids what they’d want to do if they could be doing anything. What they have to say could give you clues about what they might be missing out on. What to say (and what not to say) As parents we often want to immediately jump into problem solving mode whenever our child is having an issue. But it’s a better idea to slow down and just listen to what your kid has to say, first. Giving kids the space to open up and feel heard lets them know that it’s okay to talk about emotions — and that you’re a good person to turn to whenever they need help. For kids who might be feeling rejected or invisible, showing that you care will also be particularly meaningful to them. Waiting to hear more will help you be more supportive later, too. “If we don’t give them space to just talk, we might be coming up with a solution that’s not really a good fit for the actual problem,” points out Dr. Vibert. Here are some strategies for a good conversation: Ask open-ended questions. For example, if your child says they miss spending time with someone they used to see a lot, you can ask questions about that. “What did you really like doing with her? What do you miss the most about seeing her?” Make observations. Sometimes comments are a good alternative to questions. So, if you notice that your child isn’t spending time with people as much as they used to, you might point that out. Then leave space for them to talk. Validate their experiences. Showing genuine interest goes a long way. Do your best to listen without judgment (or visible panic) to whatever they have to say. Try also to avoid overreacting with too much sympathy or emotion, since that might make them feel even worse. You can show that you’re listening by reflecting back what they’re saying (“It sounds like you’re having a hard time”), or saying supportive things like “That sounds tough. Would you tell me more about that?” How to help kids who are struggling socially Make a plan. When something is confusing or intimidating it is often helpful to break it into smaller steps. So if your child is struggling to ask someone if they want to hang out, for example, you can work with them to come up with a plan for how to do it. Dr. Vibert recommends having a plan A and a plan B just in case. “If the child is already feeling lonely and then they’re putting themselves in a vulnerable position to reach out to somebody, I think it’s helpful for a parent to have them work through what to do if it doesn’t work out.” Having a plan B can help kids feel more confident going in, too. Practice social skills. For kids who are struggling with their social skills, try to give them plenty of opportunity to practice at their own pace in a supportive environment. Coach your child on the things they find challenging — maybe settling conflict, taking turns or noticing when someone is losing interest in an activity — and try role playing to give them experience. Relatives and family friends can also help so they get practice with multiple people. Give encouragement. Kids who are feeling anxious or depressed are less inclined to put themselves out there. “When kids say they want to stay home, it’s a challenge to figure out how much to push,” acknowledges Michelle Kaplan, LCSW, a licensed social worker. “But generally, kids are able to reflect afterward that ‘Oh, that was a little less awkward than I thought,’ or ‘I had more fun than I thought I was going to.’” Validate how kids are feeling by acknowledging that going to see people might be difficult for them. Then remind them that they’re probably going to have a good time once they’re there and offer lots of support and praise for doing something challenging. Give a reality check. Kids can sometimes struggle socially because they are prone to misunderstanding situations. This is especially easy to do with text messages, big group chats, and social media. Kids who are depressed are also more prone to interpreting things negatively even when it isn’t warranted. Dr. Allerhand has worked with teens on maintaining relationships and says that helping kids “check the facts” on a situation is important. “I think a lot of teenagers are self-focused, so they think if a relationship has fallen off, it’s because of something they’ve done. But maybe there are other interpretations.” Dr. Allerhand recommends talking it through: “‘Okay, so you haven’t spoken with Jimmy in a while. Do you have any evidence that he’s mad at you? Could there be any other reasons why you haven’t talked?’” For kids who tend to interpret things negatively a lot, helping them notice that tendency, and reminding them when they’re doing it, can help them break the pattern. Look elsewhere for friendships. When kids just aren’t fitting in, they might be looking in the wrong places. “Maybe they’ve done a lot of sports groups before, but they’re not actually into sports,” points out Kaplan. Try to find a group or activity that is more interesting to them. Getting involved in something they genuinely find exciting will also likely improve their confidence and sense of self-worth. Many kids also find success turning to the internet to explore niche interests or just connect with a larger pool of kids. “One positive thing to come out of the pandemic is there are more and more virtual groups for kids to come online and meet with other kids that have similar interests to them,” says Kaplan. But if your child does turn to the internet, make sure they stay safe. “Children with autism and developmental disabilities may have more difficulty determining if a situation is dangerous,” notes Dr. Vibert. “It’s very important that parents be not only involved, but proactive in providing education to their child about safety and danger online.” How to evaluate screen time If you’re worried that all your child seems to want to do is stare at a screen, keep in mind that screens have become a major way that kids interact with each other. While they don’t make up for in-person socializing, your child may be socializing more than you realize. Thanks to social media kids are often in closer communication with their peers than parents realize. Video games can also be a lot more social than they may initially seem. “I often suggest that parents sit by kids while they’re playing games and try to gauge how much they’re connecting with peers,” Kaplan explains. “Don’t ask a ton of questions, but maybe you can ask things like: Is there anyone else you’re playing with? Who are those kids? What are you guys working on? Do you see those kids each time you play? Are there new kids that come on? These kinds of questions can help you assess how much socializing is happening.” Some kids tend to be more comfortable socializing online and find a lot of fulfillment that way. But while the internet can be a lifesaver for kids who are struggling to fit in otherwise, socializing offline is still important. So if your child is struggling with in-person socialization, talking to a clinician who specializes in children’s mental health about how to get your child more comfortable with other people is important. Read the full article

[handshealed]

vincent. • bodyclaim. • headcanons. • isms. • threads.

BASIC INFO

full name — Vincent Hale age — thirty-eight (october 27th) gender — cis male, (he/ him/ his pronouns) orientation — homosexual occupation — paramedic deity connection — apollo  pet name — tba weapon / armor — daggers 2x + studded leather armor clothing style — casual

PHYSICAL INFO

face claim — Ian Bohen hair — dark blonde / eyes — blue height — five foot & ten inches build — there, he's been blessed with very very good genes bc he LOVES eating and isn't the biggest fan of working out, but still... y'know.. stays in shape scars — other than his heart lmao? teeny tiny little scar from when his appendix was removed (it was an emergency) tattoos — his brother's name's on his his arm, together with their birthdate piercings — he has pierced nipples, cause one of his former bfs liked it and he's a pushover and then he just kept them special characteristics — vincent is ... a ray of sunshine but with huge self-worth and abandonment issues. he will put everybody before himself, always. but no matter how sad he is, he'll attempt to keep that poster boy smile on his face sexual preference — bottom sub

PERSONALITY

alignment — ray of sunshine good positive traits — protective, caring, loyal, friendly negative traits — self-destructive, no self worth, insecure hobbies — hiking, enjoying nature, helping out where he can

MEDICAL INFO

mental — distinct lack of self worth, tends to feel like he's a bother physical — healthy bby phobias — abandonment issues eyesight — 18/20 dominant hand — right hand drug use — nop alcohol use — nop diet — food food food foooood. meat is a preference, but foooooooood.

BACKGROUND

birthplace — vernon hills, IL parents — Talia Hale (biological mother) & Apollo (biological father) siblings — anthony hale (older twin brother) pets — n/a education — high school diploma, emt + paramedic program graduate notable skills — can get by unnoticed easily bc he's not a v loud personality

BIO

Vincent was born two minutes and 33 seconds after his older brother Anthony. As a baby, he was the one to cry and giggle at the same time, amusing their parents and most likely sometimes even his twin brother. As a toddler, he was always a step behind, following his brother loyally, but still always only looking at the back of his head as Anthony moved forward determinedly. He didn’t mind though, Vincent never once felt unhappy about it. He cherished his brother dearly, even when he was only 3 years old - everybody could see just how much he admired him. It was never evaluated as a problem, quite the opposite, because Anthony was comfortable in his twin's presence.

The differences between them only grew more obvious as years went by, Vincent the shy & quiet one in the back while Anthony caught all the attention & shined brightly in it. Their mother died when they both were still little & nobody ever met their father, so they were raised by their older sister, Talia, who .. was loved by many, but when it was just them at home.. there was a different air to her. Vincent adored her, as he did ... most people, but he had to watch Anthony & her fight quite often. Of course he picked his brother's side. Always.

The first day at school, Anthony was there to comfort him. He always was. The big, protective brother and Vincent relished in it. &… they were never lonely, because they always had one another & nothing could get in-between them. Nothing.

Being born into one of the wealthiest families in the State, did come with ups & downs. Vincent had everything he could possibly want, growing up, but at the same time ... responsibility no child should be carrying around with them rested on his & Anthony's shoulders. With the twins building the family business' future, they had to be on their best behavior. Always.

But Talia underestimated the bond shared between twins - by far, especially with one of them never up to anything good & the other with an abnormal need to support the troublemaker. It started with little pranks, but as they grew older & Anthony even more confident... he also grew more ambitious & Vincent? He loved & admired his brother more than anything in the world.

Three weeks before their eleventh birthday, Talia had invited colleagues & neighbors over for a big gathering. Everybody of worth was huddled up in their house for the entire night & the boys had been reprimanded to behave. Safe to say they didn't. A scandal the neighborhood & Talia's colleagues would be talking about for a long time coming .... would be born tonight.

Long story short, Anthony thought messing wit the food would cause uproar, but it didn't, which woke the ambitious monster within him. It didn't end well. Not even Vincent can recall how it happened, but there was fire involved. A lot of it.

When blame was to be placed upon one of the twins, it wasn't Anthony who was declared culprit - Talia saw the worth in him, surely. She didn't. But she had a choice to make to fix the mess they had created & one of them had to pay for their sins, children or not. Vincent, the timid follower was useless in Talia's empire - dispensable. Anthony was the leader type, flaws or not. He was the confident, smart & independent leader she wanted. & so Vincent was officially banished & sent to a camp for troubled teens in Alaska, which was as far away as she managed to get him accepted in a few hour's time.

He didn't see it coming, but in the morning ... he found a car waiting. Unlike the other kids in BlueFire Wilderness, Vincent's stay didn't come with an expiration date, so he would be spending the next eight years there until he was old enough to decide about life by himself. He tried to escape, but even if he did, he wouldn't know where to go. But, abandoned by those he loved & alone in the world, Vincent didn't seek to get away from Camp anymore after the first months. Why bother when they forgot about him so easily?

Vincent didn't set foot in Camp Halfblood until he was fourteen, but then he'd spend the summers there at least - as was agreed on by Camp leaders. His first little dip into the truth of who his father was. His powers were ... not quite as attention-seeking as others, so it took everybody a long while to even notice. He doesn't remember when he first met his father, but it changed his life, even though he - too ...abandoned him.

When released from BlueFire Wilderness at the age of 18, Vincent became a paramedic. He'd always had that urge to help. Be it his brother or kids in camp. It didn't matter. Vincent was .. a helper & saving people's lives? Pretty good way to help.

It wasn't until about a decade later that Vincent decided to follow the call, both to find out more about who he is and what he is capable of, but also ...again, to help save lives where he can.

[gryffieverse]

Character Profile

Character’s full name: Maryanne Eloise Darling

Meaning of name: star of the sea, famous warrior

Nickname: Mo, by everyone, Darling, by Eli, Annie by Peyton

Reason for nickname: Mo is a short from Maryanne, Peyton’s mothers name is Anne, and his father calls her Annie so he does the same for Mo.

Birth date: September 13th, 1969

Zodiac sign: Virgo Virgos born on September 13 are style setters in their own way. Their cool, collected attitude marks them as winners. They do not typify the usual Virgo traits of caution and conservatism; they're more likely to walk on the wild side.

Age: 24

In a nutshell: After Mo’s boyfriend Henry disappeared, she has found herself in a new relationship with Peyton Bradley. Her life is once again turned upside down when Henry is found alive, and she must make big life decisions that she’s not sure she’s ready to make with anyone.

Physical appearance

Faceclaim: Alycia Debnam-Carey

Height: 5ft 5 (165.1 cm)

Eye color: Green

Hair color: Brown

Tattoos, scars, distinguishing features, etc: none

Fashion:

Present: 

Older:

Personality

Mo is smart and known for her logical thinking. She can come off shy, but people tend to like her easily (expect for Eli). She’s polite but is not scared to state her opinion if needed. She has issues with thinking with her heart as she’d rather choose to use her mind.

Sense of humor: Lighthearted

Character’s greatest joy in life: Her job

Character’s greatest fear: Spending her life in a way that crosses her career path

Why?  Mo has always known she wants to travel and adventure the world. She has been studying marine biology and is very passionate about it. She does not want to turn into a rich housewife.

What single event would most throw this character’s life into complete turmoil? When Henry gets kidnapped, when Henry gets back, when she finds out she’s pregnant

Character is most at ease when: While working for something she’s passionate about

Most ill at ease when: In big events where she has to be center of attention

Enraged when: Around dumb people who make fun of her life goals and expect her to just get married and be done with it.

Depressed or sad when: She doesn’t know what to do

Priorities: Work, family

If granted one wish, it would be: Finding something exciting from the deep of the ocean

Why? She’s interested about the deep sea

Character’s soft spot: her children

Is this soft spot obvious to others? She doesn’t show it unless there is a crisis

Greatest strength: Logical thinking

Greatest vulnerability or weakness: She’s too career oriented

Biggest regret: Saying yes to marrying Henry

Biggest accomplishment: Having a successful career while still being in a relationship and having a family

Minor accomplishment: Calling off her engagement

Past failures he/she would be embarrassed to have people know about: Mo gets embarrassed easily, but she doesn’t have anything big that would embarrass her. The things are more like, making out with Henry in her friend’s parents’ room when there was a party and she had told people not to go there.   

Character’s darkest secret: Knowing that Eli is in love with Henry and not telling Henry about it. For a while she’s the only one who knows about her brothers drug problem

Does anyone else know? Eli sort of knows that Mo knows.

Goals

Drives and motivations: Her thirst for knowledge

Immediate goals: To graduate and become a marine biologist and travel

Long term goals: Figuring out what she actually wants

How the character plans to accomplish these goals: Lots of studying and trying things out

How other characters will be affected: She breaks few hearts while trying to figure herself out

Past

Hometown: New York

Type of childhood: Mo’s parents were wealthy and always thought of her as their pride and joy. She was close with her brother while growing up and her whole childhood was quite stable.

Most impactful childhood memory: Her first science competition that she won

Why: It gave her the spark to follow her ambitions  

Childhood hero: Marie Curie

Dream job: Marine Biologist

Education: Bachelor's degree in marine biology and aquatic biology

Religion: Protestant

Finances: Her parents have always had money, but they weren’t as wealthy as Henry or Peyton’s families were, so she looks down at reckless wasting of money. Once she starts her career, she makes a good amount for herself as well

 Present

Current location: New York

Currently living with: Alone, then with Henry while they’re engaged and with her daughter after she is born, and they move away from Henry  

Pets: No pets

Occupation: She is still studying at the beginning of the story.

 Family

Mother: Lisbeth Darling fc: Ashley Judd

Relationship with her: Lisbeth and Mo are close, and they’re often told that they look alike. She doesn’t always understand Mo’s high ambitions as she hoped for her to start a big family.

Father: Jeff Darling fc: Josh Hamilton

Relationship with him: Jeff is always proud of his daughter and loves her and appreciates her decisions.

Siblings:

Sister: Noah Darling fc: Frank Dillane

Noah and Mo were close when they were little. While growing up they grew more distant and stopped spending that much time together. They’re very different from each other and Mo didn’t like the decisions Noah made with his life. She started to really dislike him when he started abusing drugs and she was the only one to know about it for a long time. She was forced to deal with him when he overdosed and then wouldn’t go to rehab no matter how hard she and their parents begged for him.

Love interests: Henry Van Tassel, Peyton Bradley, Charlie Meadows

Relationship with him/her: Henry (fc: Matthew Daddario) Henry and Mo started dating in high school when she was sixteen and he was eighteen. They dated on and off for many years. They were together when Henry was kidnapped. She thought that he had just left somewhere as did most of people but the two resumed their relationship afterwards, after Mo chose Henry over Peyton Bradley. They even got engaged, though neither was really sure if continuing to date is the right way forward. During their attempt to make their relationship work, Mo got pregnant, but they broke up due to Henry’s feelings for his best friend Eli. They remained friends and shared the custody of their daughter.

Peyton Bradley (fc: Sam Claflin)

Peyton had been in love with Mo ever since high school but stepped away from the situation when Henry and Mo first got together. When Henry disappeared and people thought he had just left the town, Peyton got his change again and the two started seeing each other. His parents adored Mo and wanted her to be part of their family. She liked him fine enough but was still wondering on what she wanted to do with her life as she had moved from one rich boy to a next one. She was also having hard time with getting used to someone as nice as Peyton, after having such a dramatic relationship with Henry before. After Henry came back, she broke things off with Peyton and got back together with him, breaking Peyton’s heart.

 Charlie (fc: Tatiana Maslany)

Mo met Charlie the day Henry was found. She was a shop clerk and Mo got the phone call while in the store and it caused her to have an anxiety attack. Charlie helped her over the situation, and she wanted to later thank her by buying her flowers. The two became good friends and after she broke up with Henry for the final time, the two started dating. They share the same look in life and made their relationship work. She’s also part of Lou’s life

Children: Marylou Van Tassel  

Relationship with them:

Mo loves her daughter but is very busy with her life which equals a bit more distant relationship for the two.

Favorites

Color: Brown

Music: mainstream music

Food: spaghetti

Literature: She reads a lot of books, fiction and science

Form of entertainment: Reading, researching

Mode of transportation: Depends on a situation

 Habits

Hobbies: Reading

How he/she would spend a rainy day: Studying

Spending habits: Is careful with money and knows it’s worth

Smokes: no

Drinks: sometimes

Other drugs: no

What does he/she do too much of? study, work

What does he/she do too little of? relax, spend time with her daughter

Extremely skilled at: Science, academics

Extremely unskilled at: she’s not very artistic

Traits

Optimist or pessimist

Introvert or extrovert

Daredevil or cautious

Logical or emotional

Disorderly and messy or methodical and neat

Prefers working or relaxing

Confident or unsure of himself/herself

Animal lover

 Self-perception

How he/she feels about himself/herself: She appreciates herself and her ambitions

One word the character would use to describe self: hardworking

What does the character consider his/her best personality trait? her intelligence

What does the character consider his/her worst personality trait? her emotional side

What does the character consider his/her best physical characteristic? She doesn’t really think about it looks

What does the character consider his/her worst physical characteristic? She doesn’t think about faults in her looks either

How does the character think others perceive him/her: Hardworking, quiet and busy

 Relationships with others

Opinion of other people in general: She likes good people

Person character most hates: She doesn’t hate anyone but William McAllister is a good candidate

Best friend(s): Eli Moore

Eli and Mo spend years disliking each other with Eli being jealous about Henry and Mo seeing right through him about his feelings for her boyfriend. After Henry got kidnapped the two bonded and she became his most trusted friend. She was even his best man for his and Henry’s wedding.

Other friends: Lorelai Austen, Raleigh Holt

Person character goes to for advice: Her father

Person character feels responsible for or takes care of: Lou

Person character feels shy or awkward around: Charlie at first, Henry’s parents

Person character openly admires: Charlie

Person character secretly admires: -

Most important person in character’s life before story starts: Eli Moore

After story starts: Henry, then Lou

[tailless-whale]

.

[killerlookz]

College! Edward Nashton ━ Headcanons (SFW and NSFW)

a/n: i dunno why but i always have THE BIGGEST college! eddie brainrot... so here's some general/relationship headcanons. Sfw relationship hcs are x gn! reader, nsfw hcs are x f! reader. My apologies for the weird page breaks. had to get arround the annoying bulletpoint character limit somehow.

contents: contains 18+ content (smut) mdni!! also contains mentions of drugs, alcohol, and smoking

General Headcanons:

Edward didn't have much apprehension about going to college, he'd essentially been on his own his entire life only now he got three meals a day, and a decent bed to sleep on.

Also, this time around he's not completely alone, he has a couple of friends. two to be exact. they're a bit dorky, but so is he.

Eddie likes to skip class a lot, not in a lazy/slacker sort of way but just, he hates going to class, he's always hated school in general.

He knows enough to get by though, Edward is smart, especially when it comes to problem-solving, but he often doesn't have the energy to put any real time into his studies.

This is not a shocker, but he's not really a huge partier. Or a partier at all really. He doesn't like most of the people he goes to college with, why would he want to spend more time with them?

If we're to believe Edward's license in The Batman then he'd be going to college around 2003-2007... which is... wink...the prime emo music era.

Edward's not really into bands like fall out boy or panic! at the disco though, he tends to get a little stuck up when it comes to music and he finds them "too polished"

My Chemical Romance on the other hand? Oh, he could fuck it up to some mcr, hell yeah.

Gotham is in New Jersey... My Chemical Romance is from New Jersey, Eddie definitely at one point or another during My Chem's early 'Bullets' days found himself at one of their shows.

Actually Eddie really enjoys going to local shows. He doesn't really talk to anyone there, nor does he really dance, or mosh- he likes to just stand in the back and watch.

Edward enjoys seeing hardcore and screamo shows the most, he finds the vocal style insanely cathartic.

Sometimes he gets jealous watching the people who can just let loose and have a good time, but, he justifies it by saying standing there quietly is his idea of having a good time.

Eddie doesn't really drink at all. Maybe a beer on occasion, but never hard liquor or wine.

He does drops semi-frequently, a bad habit he picked up while in the orphanage. This is more so during his early days rather though, and he tries to wane off of them as he nears graduation.

He also smokes weed on a more frequent basis than he does drops. And despite his general awkwardness, he gets along pretty well with his plug, but he wouldn't consider the two of them friends.

His worst vice is smoking cigarettes, however. He'd picked up the habit while in the orphanage as well, and his nicotine addiction only worsened once he didn't have to sneak around with it anymore.

He enjoys menthol cigarettes the most because he's just a pretty big fan of mint in general, but he'll smoke just about any type of cigarette he can get his hands on.

Eddie for sure hates his roommate, he's loud, obnoxious, and rude-just the type of dude who'd bully him in high school. In fact, his roommate does bully him , despite being an adult. But, Edward isn't really surprised because guys like that usually never grow out of high school.

Sometimes when his roommate is out Edward will steal his papers, or erase/change his homework answers just to get back and fuck with him a little.

SFW Relationship Headcanons:

You and Edward met while you were drunkenly stumbling back to your dorm after a night out. He'd been standing outside on that late night, smoking a cigarette, you vaguely recognized him from one of your classes, you'd always thought he was cute. With the alcohol still rampant in your system, you were suddenly craving a cigarette, so you went up to him and asked him to bum one.

The two of you talked all that night, he was genuinely really surprised you'd been so nice to him. You were attentive and sweet, he instantly developed a crush on you.

You became fast friends, the two of you often ditching your respective friend groups to see each other.

Eventually that friendship became a little something more after you'd without thinking, kissed him goodbye on the cheek one night after he walked you back to your dorm.

You apologized incessantly but soon found his lips on yours, and you kissed him right back.



You're Edward's first-ever relationship, so he's pretty awkward and fumble-y a lot of the time. It's not that he's not comfortable around you, he's just never done this before.

But, boy, is that man head over heels in love with you. He just wants to spend every. single. hour of the day with you. His habit of skipping class only gets worse now that he's skipping his classes to see you when you have downtime.

You honestly end up having to have an intervention with him about it, because, his grades are starting to slip, and he's essentially just wasting the money he's been working for by not going to class.

Edward, reluctantly agrees to start going to class more, only because it'll make you happy though, not because he actually thinks there's any problem.

The two of you also go on little study dates in an attempt to help fix Edward's failing grades. You're not much of a tutor to him, rather just good company while he completes his mountains of missing assignments.

Edward does the best he can when it comes to dates, but, he's a broke college student, and so are you, so most of the time things aren't very extravagant.

He takes you to the movies a lot since it's pretty much within budget. It's become pretty much tradition to have bi-weekly movie dates, seeing almost every new movie that comes out. It's sweet, the two of you share snacks and hold hands during the movie, sometimes you'll push up the arm rests and snuggle into him, especially if the movie is late at night and you start to get sleepy.

He does however sometimes take more hours at work whenever he overhears you mention something you'd like so he can get the money and buy it for you.

Eddie is insanely overprotective, despite his slight stature. He's got a height advantage on most people, but that's about it. But if anyone even tried to lay a finger on you, he'd make his best attempt to beat them to a pulp.

It takes him a while, but, eventually, Edward gets pretty into PDA, not like full-on making out in public or anything, but holding hands, hugging, small kisses in public, etc... he loves it all. he absolutely adores showing you off.

One of his favorite past times is snuggling up with you while the two of you do a crossword puzzle, he likes to hold you from behind while you attempt the puzzle, he'll look over your shoulder and whisper hints in your ear, and absolutely smother you in kisses when you get an answer right.

Eddie also takes you to shows with him, he tries to keep you away from the pit because he's pretty overprotective, but, if you really want to mosh he doesn't really have any objections.

Usually though, the two of you will just stand in the small crowd together, him behind you, arms wrapped tight around you, his chin resting on the top of your head.

He's pretty scared to tell you about his childhood and waits a pretty long time to do so, he's worried you will somehow think less of him if you knew the conditions he grew up in. and he was, absolutely relieved when that was not the case at all.

One evening he spills everything to you, winding up a crying mess by the end of it. But he feels SO much better having gotten it off his chest, and he's so relieved when you don't judge him at all, and you're there with literally anything he needs, holding and comforting him throughout the entire story.

Eddie isn't really put off by anything you do (no "icks" for him) and the same vise-versa, Edward is so glad he's finally found someone he feels entirely comfortable and can just be himself with.

NSFW Relationship Headcanons: 18+ content!!!

Not only are you Edward's first relationship, but you're also Edward's first time, he's definitely a virgin before the two of you meet.

He's pretty shy when it comes to sex, and it takes a pretty long time for the two of you to go all the way. Of course, you're very patient with him! You'd never want to pressure him into doing something he's not ready for.

He worries you may mistake his shyness around the subject as uneagerness, but that is NOT the case, he is very eager.

Being a 18-22 in college and all his sex drive is insanely high, you just breathing within a few feet of him gets him horny.

Until you two do go all the way through, Eddie enjoys doing pretty much everything but.

You'll place your hand on his thigh while the two of you are making out, and he'll start desperately trying to change his position, trying to move so he can get some friction against your hand.

You get the memo pretty quickly and start to feel him up through his jeans. You're not even in contact with his skin, but even between the two layers of fabric between your hand and him, he's an absolute mess, trying his best to suppress his loud moans into the kiss.

Eventually, and pretty quickly he's finishing in his pants, and god is he embarrassed. But you're quickly there to tell him there's no need to be embarrassed and that's literally just a natural response to being touched like that.

Eventually Eddie warms up to you a little more, and you move onto handjobs, and blowjobs. He's definitely very nervous about you seeing his dick, due to the standards porn has created he's worried you may laugh at him and call him small. But, you quickly squash that fear by telling him he's just perfect, and you wouldn't want him any other way.

You're going to have to teach him the ways around your anatomy, sorry, but before you he definitely had no fucking clue wtf the clit is.

You don't mind though because he actually wants to learn how to please you. One night he bashfully asks if he could try fingering you and if you could help him out.

Of course you oblige, and you gently guide his fingers through your folds, telling him what to do where, and what you specifically like. He gets the hang of it pretty quickly, eventually, you're letting go of his hand as he does all the work himself. And before you know it your head is thrown back in absolute pleasure and you can't contain the moans that escape your mouth as he works his fingers in and out of you with his thumb gently circling your clit. It may take a little while to get there, but eventually, you're out of breath, cumming all over his fingers

The first few times he eats you out aren't great, he's not bad, just inexperienced. but, as with anything, he gets better with practice, and eventually it becomes one of his favorite things to do, and one of your favorite things to have done to you.

But, Eddie definitely prefers recieving oral rather than giving, not out of selfishness but, because he just feels a little insecure about his skills when it comes to it. Reciving on the other hand? Oh he's a mess, the first time you ever gave him a blowjob he was cumming down your throat the minute your tongue swirled around the head of his cock. (Though, he eventually does gain more stamina, and is able to last a lot longer)

You're just over 3 months into dating when you finally go all the way, and Eddie's a mess, he's so nervous but he wants you so bad, worse than he's wanted anything in his entire life.

The first time is very slow, and gentle, and just a little bit awkward. You're very careful with him, constantly asking and making sure he's alright. There's a lot, a lot of build-up/foreplay beforehand to ease into it.

You decide the best position is for you to be on top so you can guide him a little bit better. And it's really not bad at all, but Edward is so worked up from all the foreplay, and the nerves that he finishes in less than a minute.

He ends up crying, both out of sheer pleasure and embarrassment. But you assure him there's literally nothing to be embarrassed of, and that you're so glad you were able to make him feel that good.

Right after this was the first time either of you had ever said "i love you". as you were stroking edward's cheek, drying off one of his tears, telling him everything was okay, it kind of just slipped out of his mouth- and before he could even start to apologize, you say it right back.

From that point on sex is pretty regular in your relationship. Being similar in age, you have a sex drive to match Edward's, so, the two of you are ready to go at it at any moment when you know you'll be totally alone for a while.

His favorite position is cowgirl, he loves it when you ride him, though, he also enjoys missionary, he's not huge on doggy style- he prefers to see your face, it makes sex feel more intimate.

He also (especially in the beginning) prefers to listen to music during sex, pure silence aside from the noises the two of you are making, sometimes tends to make him a bit nervous, he feels music tends to relieve some of his tension. (His favorite songs to do it to are Knife Prty by Deftones and Blue by A Perfect Circle)

Being in college and all he's pretty vanilla, which is obviously no problem at all. he's still pretty young, so, he's not really going to be into anything insanely kinky, or huge into experimenting, he's still just trying to find his footing with sex in general.

He does have things he does know he likes though. He loooves hickeys, the sensation of your teeth grazing his neck combined with your warm, soft lips sends him into an absolute daze!! he also just loves the pretty purple and red bruises you leave all over his neck, he loves being marked as yours, and he loves doing the same to you.

He also loves when you pull his hair, whether its while you're kissing, or he's eating you out, or during sex, it drives him wild, just that little action to let him know how good he's making you feel.

The same goes with scratching, he honestly encourages you to dig your nails into him, he doesn't mind the sting.

The most "extreme" thing he's ever done really, was taking some nude polaroids with you. he's got a couple (a lot) of you posing in various positions for him in a shoebox under his bed which he guards with his entire life (he'd obviously never, under any circumstance let those get out). he makes sure his roommate doesn't know that that shoebox even exists, and if he'd somehow know about it, it's strategically buried under so much junk he'd never find it.

Those pictures are 100% masturbation material for him, ever since dating he only jerks off to the thought of or pictures of you. porn has been absent in his life since you came into it.

You, of course, also have a couple of him, but he's not much of a photograph person, and doesn't really enjoy getting his picture taken. But, the ones you have you think are absolutely adorable.

Edward still masturbates relatively frequently, now that you're together, 2-3 times a week maybe, not as much as he used to which was usually at least once a day. He can't help it, sometimes he's in his dorm room late at night and you're not around, he has nothing else to turn to but his hand.

There's definitely a fair bit of phone sex/ mutual masturbation whenever you go home during winter/spring break. Edward's able to get off to the sound of your voice just as easily as he does when he's buried in you.

He honestly enjoys phone sex a lot, obviously he'd rather physically be inside you, but the sound of your sweet voice moaning some of the dirtiest words he's ever heard combined with the faint noises of you touching yourself make for a deadly combination in Edward's eyes.

Overall, sex with Eddie is mutually very fun. He's a very sweet partner who is just as concerned with your pleasure as he is his own.

[strawberry-cowmilk]

Hey hey I'm here with more scenarios with angst to give!~

Ok. So one day everyone was invited for a tea party at Diavolo's castle, but sadly barbs had to go on some urgent business, however he had left some tea and sweets for everyone to enjoy.

As a servent place everyone's teat in front of them. MC was the last to receive her cup. The tea looked pitch black. MC looked at the cup suspensly before looking at belpies cup. It seemed to be the same so she shrugged it of. She then took a big glup of the strong tea.

It tasted bitter and sweet.

So she continues to drink the tea and then went to grab a slice of chocolate cake when something felt off.

Something didn't feel right

"MC?" Luke asked as placed his own tea cup down."you look pale are you alright?"

Before MC could answer she notice something crowling up her hands. Black vains were appearing in her body. Then.

Blood.

At least a cup full of blood came out of MC mouth.

Everything And everyone became silent.

"whoops, sorry" MC said in a weak voice.

(here it is~)

Welcome back! I'm not the best at writing gore, but I'll try my best! Enjoy

the obey me cast reacts to the aftermath of mc eating a suspicious cake

-> brothers and side characters x mc (luke platonic)

mc's gender is not mentioned, not proof read

content warnings: angst, (implied) drugging, blood, lesson 16 spoilers and mentions, mentions of death, torture mentions

-----

Lucifer

what just happened? did barbatos put something in the food? was it the servant?

whoever did this got themself in great trouble

lucifer would recognise the symptoms of whatever is happening, so he might have a spell to cure it

Mammon

screams very loudly

this reminds him of that time belphie killed you, and you were laying there, bleeding out in his arms

mammon quickly starts begging lucifer, satan, diavolo or solomon to do something to help you

Leviathan

he was looking at something on his ddd, so he wasn't paying much attention to his surroundings at first

then levi heard an awful sound coming from you, so he looked and the sight almost gave him a heart attack

immediately starts blaming himself, maybe if he paid more attention to things around him this wouldn't have happened

Satan

quickly tries to find a healing spell of some sort before turning his aggression on the servant

he doesn't think barbatos drugged the cake, since mc got sick after he left

anyways, hopefully that servant likes torture

Asmodeus

he also screeches

asmo holds you as somebody tends to your injury

when you seem to be doing better, he calls barbatos, telling him what had happened and asking him to look into the past to find the culprit of this incident

Beelzebub

why is this happening?

he ate the same food as you, so why are you getting problems, and not both of you? was there a non-human-safe ingredient in something?

beel can't lose you too, first lilith and now this, he hopes somebody can heal you

Belphegor

he gets flashbacks to that time when he killed you, and boy does that scare him

belphie is terrified he's going to lose you again, and hopes somebody got a spell for this

he will also find out who caused this, and they will be screwed

Diavolo

this is the biggest scare of his life

and he's lived for very long, that says something

luckily, he knows a few spells that might help the situation, he was able to revive lilith as a human, so he could help you too

Barbatos

he didn't know what had happened until after asmo called him, shock apparent in his voice

immediately leaves whatever business he had to attend to

he needs to make sure how everyone is doing, more importantly, he needs to check whether you are alright or not

Simeon

this is not something he could have seen coming

he quickly turned luke away from the gruesome sight, to spare his sanity

he tries to use whatever power he possesses as an angel to attempt to help you

Luke

he didn't see much of what just happened because simeon almost immediately turned him away

but he did hear everything, everyone's panicked voices, the sound of blood being coughed up

he wants to help, but sadly he can't

Solomon

uses every healing spell he knows and hopes one works

solomon tries to stay calm, but on the inside, everything's chaos

he doesn't know what he would do without you, he already didn't spend much time with you, he'd regret everything if you left him

[philsmeatylegss]

talk to us about the john mulaney thing pls, absolutely go wild!

ok. warning this might be a bit all over the place i just got back from a family party and i’m a bit tired.

i think it’s important for all of us to understand that john mulaney is a grown man who shouldn’t feel pressure to make decisions to please people. we cannot dictate and we should not dictate how he lives. we can express our opinions on the situation like i’m about to do, but there is so much going on that we don’t see and it isn’t fair to act like i do. this is just how i feel about the information made public and my personal morals. if more information comes out, i’m always open to changing my opinion.

my opinions on this is all over the place. to start with, i think the biggest victim in all of this is the baby. there are other victims in this situation, but none of them even close to what the baby goes through. that’s because everyone else being victimized are adults who chose to be where they are. this baby didn’t ask to be put in a situation like this.

i’ll admit from the get go that because of personal issues and my own problems, i may get a bit too angry about situations like this. a child is such an innocent thing who never ever chose to be put where they were. they shouldn’t have to deal with the consequences of a situation that never chose to be in. and being in a household with parents like john and nicole (?) is not going to be healthy.

john just got out of rehab after a huge relapse. do you know how delicate a person is at that time in your life? it is a period where you need to be alone and care for yourself. it is extremely difficult to heal from addiction after a relapse and deal with a newborn baby. which is a very very stressful situation. stressful situations tend to lead to relapses. it’s normal to relapse. it’s normal to relapse a lot. in fact, if you don’t relapse you’re probably doing something wrong. it’s unfair to both john and his child that he won’t have the room to relapse. that’s a lot of pressure. which, once again, stress heightens the risk of relapse.

i do feel bad for anna as well. i consider her a victim. the problem is that i feel there is probably so much going on behind the scenes between the two of them that we don’t know that i don’t feel comfortable or confident enough to fully state my opinion. as far as i know, i really do think she’s a victim to the situation as well. but we don’t know about their situation as much (and it’s not our place to know it). i mostly just have sympathy for her.

i feel really not the best about nicole. i’m biased once again because of my own issues. also i had never heard of her before this when i was very familiar and a big fan of john before this. so that alone makes me already not like her as much. but i just get seriously bad vibes that the second he got out of rehab and a divorce, she pounced on him and got pregnant with him. once again as i keep stating, it’s possible there is a lot between them that we don’t know about. but with the knowledge made public, i think it’s really manipulative and shitty for a person to take advantage of an obviously very fragile guy

i don’t want this to seem like none of the blame should be put on john. his addiction is an explanation, not an excuse. he isn’t a baby. he’s a man fully capable of making his own choices that landed him in this situation which is not a great one. addiction to anything changes a person internally. a lot. but it doesn’t change knowing right from wrong.

i do think the most evil character in the situation is drugs and addiction. i think a lot of what happened here is due to being victims of circumstance. but that does not excuse fully aware adults bringing an innocent child who didn’t ask to be here in a toxic situation. who knows? maybe they end up being great parents. i doubt that immensely, but that’s not my place to determine.

i just get very upset that an innocent child was put in the mix of this. i wouldn’t be nearly as upset if there wasn’t a baby. because then it’s just drama between. adults. but this is a human being that did nothing wrong. and in my opinion, it is incredibly irresponsible to do this to an innocent child. put their emotional and mental health at risk for shit that the parents are dealing with. that’s what just gets me the most. that a child was brought into the mix. it’s such a toxic environment from the get go. it’s something we know from the limited information we have. a child doesn’t choose to be born, the parents do. the parents also have the responsibility to bring this child into a mentally and emotionally healthy situation that can allow a child to flourish. and i don’t think their baby is getting that.

i’m sorry if this is all over the place and a bit messy i’m tired. but i just want to say it another time. it’s not our place to say what john does with his life. he is a grown man who can make his own decisions. i know for a fact there is so much information that we don’t know and he doesn’t owe this information to us. i’ve expressed my opinion. i think the child is the biggest victim out of all of it. addiction is the catalyst to a lot of the issues. these are adults who are fully capable of making decisions that are making decisions that i personally think aren’t okay. i think it is unfair to put a child in an environment with someone who is freshly recovering after a relapse. that’s not fair to either of them. that’s how i feel. that does not make it a fact. that doesn’t mean i should dictate how john lives his life because frankly my opinion shouldn’t matter to him. he’s a grown man who doesn’t need to be babied. he’s allowed to do whatever he wants. we can have our opinions, but it’s not our place to shame him for his actions.

[emisonme]

This will be big but i felt like sharing my thoughs. I love camila, so so much…but I feel like sometimes people are praising her too much. Camila loves fame, no matter how many of you deny it, it’s pretty obvious that she does. I’ve seen plenty of arguments on twitter regarding the 4H vs C topic and I can’t help but notice some people saying stuff like “camila didn’t choose to be in this position”, “all the girls treated her like shit when it wasn’t even up to her decide”. Well obviously I know the feud between the 5H girls was fake, but it really messes with me that people still continue to paint camila as the victim. Even tho camila may have not betrayed the other girls as they tried to make it seem, she sure as hell accepted this full of privileges position she was given since the beginning. And I’m not saying this is a bad thing, because honestly which one of us would deny such opportunity, if we were in her place? But most of us and I’m also talking about me, tend to forget that camila is also a person who has negative traits, not only positives. Unfortunately one of her biggest negatives, is that she grew to love the spotlight. And if you really think about it, it makes sense since she was always so shy around people and when she got a taste of the “pop star” life, she felt mesmerised by it. From my point of view, as soon as she got that taste she also started craving the “bigger” things. Big arena concerts, awards, people loving her. For example lauren might love her job as an artist, but she undeniably hates the fame that comes with it. She’s just in it because she truly wants to share a piece of her soul and justify the definition of a true artist. And I’m not saying that mila is not, she sure as hell wants to create art. But if you ask me, the difference between these two is that lauren would be completely content with singing in a room full of people who simply appreciate her art, whilst camila would prefer to be in an arena full of people who sing her songs and scream her name. Not that laure wouldn’t like that, but I think you get the point. And I don’t know if anyone noticed, but until a few years ago well actually before the pandemic started, her management continued to push down the image of this “goofy innocent” girl who was happy all the time. She also pushed it herself because that was her job! No matter how much we think we know her,camila is still a pop star in the music industry who plays a part, just like everyone else who works in that damned department. And based on the above I’d like to point out that (no matter how many of you disagree with this) nobody is forcing camila to stay in the closet. Yes I know I sound ridiculous but hear me out. There isn’t a single contract which can legally force someone to hide their sexuality. Yes her management may have warned her not to come out in fear of losing profits and even blackmailed her, but at the end of the day it’s her choice. If she desperately wanted to come out as we all make it seem, she would’ve done it by now. The fact that she doesn’t, should tell us, that afterall she does care about her image. Even if that’s taking a toll on her now, it was her decision to follow that path. It was her decision to stay in the closet, it was her decision to accept the pr with shawn and it was her decision to keep playing the “happy” girlfriend to the media. No matter how much she was manipulated by this hell hole, camila is a pretty clever person. If she didn’t want any of this and simply wanted to be authentic to herself and the rest of the world, she simply wouldn’t care if she lost the title of the pop princess. But she does care. And it’s completely normal at this point, cause in this industry either you lose yourself or you come out stronger. Unfortunately I believe that camila’s case belongs to the first occasion. I don’t think that present camila we see in interviews or shows or whatever is the real camila. That camila is long gone. Anyway sorry if this was exhausting and thanks to anyone who read it all,cause I really wanted to share this with someone

someone

Good Lord, Anon, that's a lot to unpack. I will start by saying, I agree with some, and disagree with some of what you had to say. Now, where to start...

You say it still messes with you, that everyone still portrays Camila as the victim. Are you going to deny that Camila WAS/IS victimized? The truth is, they were ALL victimized. They are ALL victims of an abusive Industry.

You said, "she sure as hell accepted this full of privileges position she was given since the beginning." You are either forgetting, or just plain don't care, that Fifth Harmony was a highly controlled entity. There was no choosing, or "accepting" privileges. They each did what they were told to do, said what they were told to say, and acted the way they were told to act. They were each given a role to play, and they were contractually obligated to play that role.

Yes, they were contractually obligated to act a certain way. There has been ample proof given, that none of the girls had any control over their PUBLIC image. Camila still has no control over her PUBLIC image, because there has been ample proof, she is still operating under her original contract.

Did Camila choose to sign that original contract? Yes, she did. Did she read that original contract? According to Lauren, probably not. None of them did. Did Camila agree to sign her solo contract? Yes, she did. But as I've explained before, if she wanted to continue in the music industry, she had no choice but to sign the solo contract they offered her. That solo contract is still connected to her original contract.

Camila is a human being. We ALL have positive and negative traits. Camila, all the ladies of 5H, you and me, we all have our positives and negatives. None of us are perfect.

You said, "one of her biggest negatives, is that she grew to love the spotlight." Why is that a negative? Hell, they ALL wanted the spotlight. Every person who gets into the Entertainment Industry, wants to get themselves in the spotlight. They all want to succeed in the field of their choice. To succeed, they have to garner the attention, and live in the "spotlight", in one way, or another.

Every one of them auditioned on a NATIONALLY TELEVISED talent show. They wouldn't have done that, if they didn't want to be noticed, and hopefully thrust into the spotlight of success. They ALL wanted that spotlight of success to be as solo artists. It's didn't quite work out that way. But, they ALL chose to try and achieve that spotlight as a group.

If one has been paying attention, from the beginning, Camila made no bones about her desired dream. She has stated from the beginning, she wanted to be a "pop star". Of course she wanted the spotlight. Lauren has said, from the beginning, she wanted to be "famous and travel the world". She wanted to be a famous star, in the spotlight.

Since you have chosen to compare Camila and Lauren, I'll answer to them. You seem to think there is this big chasm between the two. There really isn't. The only difference is the outcome, thus far. Lauren STILL wants the spotlight and fame, she just wants it on her terms. The problem is, it's damn near impossible to get that success on ones own terms, in an Industry that insists on dictating the terms.

That's a more recent decision on Lauren's part, by the way. You seem to be conveniently forgetting, that until 2019, Lauren also "chose" to play the game on THEIR terms. It was most likely, a two year PR contract, with a drug addicted gang-banger that turned her off of THE GAME. Lauren was pissed, that after all that, her debut album got shelved in 2019. I DON'T BLAME HER!!! I'm sure that also contributed to her decision, that THEIR TERMS suck ass.

Does Camila "crave" the big concerts, accolades, and people loving her? Yes, she does. They ALL do, or they wouldn't have signed solo contracts after putting 5H on hiatus. Instead, they would have said "this Industry sucks" and walked away. They didn't. They ALL craved more.

Lauren wants the same thing Camila has, just on her terms. Lauren doesn't "hate fame". She hates the negative side of fame. She hates having her life dictated by terms and schedules. She hates being told what to say, and how to act. She hates that fans get all up in her business.

She loves the nicer side of fame. She wants to see a lot of people come and see her perform. She loves to be on stage and see her fans singing and dancing to her music. She appreciates the accolades. She loves the love she gets from her fans. She would love even more, if her fans would multiply, and buy and stream the hell out of her music, instead of always bitching, telling her who she is, and how she should be, and getting all up in her damn business.

All one has to do, is listen to Lauren and the anger inside her about all this mess. She wants more. She wants more than a fucking "room full of people" enjoying her art. She wants a stadium full of people enjoying her art. WHO THE FUCK WOULDN'T. She just wants that stadium full of people to enjoy her art, and not expect more than that from her. I'm sure Camila would appreciate the same damn thing.

Unfortunately, that's simply not how the music industry is set up, these days. The difference is, Camila has accepted the fact, that she IS the product. Lauren has not. Lauren don't want to be a product. She wants her music/art to be the product.

I've said it a million times, the music industry hardly sells music, anymore. The music Industry sells the artist. The music has become a bi-product of the Artist. The Industry knows which artists will sell, and which ones won't. They know what image will sell, and which ones won't. Be the artist THEY want you to be, THEY'LL make you a star, and maybe even famous. If not, good luck.

Finally, you are completely right. There isn't a contract out there, that says someone can't come out of the closet. That would be blatant discrimination, and wouldn't pass the muster of the legal system. But, when you sign away control of your own image in a contract, that gives the contract holder the rights to dictate what your PUBLIC image will be. If they want you to have a straight PUBLIC image, then you'll have a straight PUBLIC image. If THEY want you to have a "good girl next door" image, then that's the PUBLIC image you'll have. You signed away your rights to be your authentic self, when you signed away the rights to control how others see you, period!!!

IN MY OPINION, Camila has come out of the closet so damn many times, I can't even count any more. She just has to do so, in a way that isn't obvious to those who have control over how others see her. Take her last video, for instance. When one listens to terms she chooses to use, and does a bit of research, you'll discover, what I believe is the hidden meaning behind that video. If I'm correct in MY THINKING, she has yet again, screamed her truth from the rooftops, for those who choose to listen, and understand.

As for the PR contracts...I was the first person to say, Camila made the choice to sign into those particular contracts. When one signs away control over their own public image, it also allows those in control to dictate that one MUST enter into PR contracts to help THEM present the PUBLIC image THEY want for that particular artist. The artist gets a say in which person that PR is with, simply because they HAVE to agree to sign the contract with that particular person.

So, did Camila agree to sign into this PR contract with the human hair ball? She absolutely did....And NO ONE should be surprised by it. It is quite clear that this shit has been in the making, since June/July of 2015. Hell, after that shit show with the British Bore, even the majority of the fandom was asking for it. The timing was right, and here we are.

Lastly, Camila is always stepping out of the closet, like I said above. IN MY OPINION, she wants her fans to know who she truly is, but that doesn't mean she wants to tell the world in definitive terms. Like Lauren, she wishes people could simply appreciate the music, and leave per private life out of it, but she also knows that's a pipe dream, and not reality.

She knows, the second she decides to speak her truth aloud, her career takes, yet another, blow. I also think, that's one of the reasons THEY, through the media, make sure her ignorant youth is continuously brought up. The more she has to fight to get through that hardship, the more she will want to keep her truth a secret. (yes, a definite manipulation tactic)

Camila could decide to say, fuck it all, and come out with her truth at any time, after her contract is up. She could also decide never to PUBLICLY come out. It's her choice, unless people in power decide to take that choice away from her.

Whitney Houston took her truth with her to the grave. Taylor lives with her truth, one foot in the closet, and one foot out. That's basically what Camila is doing now. IN MY OPINION. Her public foot is in the closet, and her music/art foot is out. If people cared more about the music/art, they would get the authentic truth. If you care more about her public image, you'll get exactly what THEY want her to be.

People try to tell you, and others this all the damn time. Take the recent interviews. If you notice, Camila, and others are always saying how vulnerable, honest, and authentic she is, IN HER ART. Her truth is in her craft, whether acting or music. Her PUBLIC image, is just that, an image to sell to the PUBLIC. Everyone in the Entertainment Industry has one...Even Lauren. Yes, she did play the game. She still has her toe in the game, she just isn't playing it at a high level, right now...and, unfortunately for her, it shows!!!

There! I answered your book with a damn novel. As always, I could be wrong with my opinions, but they are my opinions!!!!!! !! !!!!

[officialgritty]

How I Would Humble NHL Players

An essay written by bigboigritty. 

I would humble hockey players the only way I know how to, by sending them to Australia. Let’s suppose that they have decided to hold the All Star game over here (forget about it’s usual date) (forget that some players I have listed below might not be invited) (and while you're at it, please forget that Australia’s rinks are Not Good).

I think that they would suffer but in an entertaining way so it’s fine. 

First of all, their biggest concern is getting sunburnt. It would effect all of their dumb asses but I’m particularly worried about Pierre-Luc Dubois and Mitch Marner. Boys are practically translucent. Vince Dunn would be fine, he’d probably wear a shirt most of the time which is a very smart decision. 

You may wonder why I didn’t mention Nolan Patrick because I am a certified slut for him, well I don't think he would have a problem. He would spend most of the time inside and when he joins the others, I think his Virgo ass would reapply sunscreen. Maybe he would burn slightly but I don't think it'd be enough to make him uncomfortable. 

Another thing that I think they will gain from this experience is a higher pain tolerance. Now you’re probably thinking, “Zoe they are NHL players so they can handle pain.” Wrong.

Real pain is running barefoot on cement at theme parks while you race to get to the next ride. Also getting into the car and having to avoid touching every piece of metal to not get branded like a cow. Or better yet, when the heat gets so bad that there’s a black out because everyone has their air conditioning turned on.

Don’t get me wrong, I know that other countries have scary animals but I would pay to see them panic over ours. Crocodiles here can grow up to 5.2 metres / 17 feet. We have a box jellyfish season where it’s advised to avoid swimming or wear wetsuits for coverage. Funnel web spiders can survive underwater for hours by trapping air bubbles around their skin. We have several of the worlds deadliest snakes present across the country. 

Listen, I don't want anyone to get injured but the constant fear that they would have when doing anything would be enough to make me happy.

My biggest question is who would survive in the shady areas, who would survive the eshays?

Under no circumstances can you look them in the eyes or cross their path. They are not to be feared individually but in groups caution is advised. I think the players would attempt to assert dominance and that is simply not an option. You are better off to ignore the eshay.

Nolan would have no issues here if im being honest. He is big and I don't think they’d find it worth it to fuck with him. But you know who they would target? Matthew Tkachuk. “Where are you going pretty boy?” “Oi braa did we hurt your feelings ya pussy cunt?” They would make fun of his hair in particular. 

Travis Konecny would be an eshay. I don't think I need to make further comment. (So would Louis Tomlinson but I am not a 1D account and I will continue to repeat that until it’s true.)

I would also give them a few iconic tasks to get the true Australian experience. Activities for the ‘vacation’ include triathlon events, beach flags, bush walking and climbing the harbour bridge. They could attend a cricket match but they tend to like golf so unfortunately they would probably enjoy this :(

AFL is an extremely popular sport here and I think they would loose their shit when they learn the rules of this game. No protective equipment is used other than mouthguards, that's it. That’s all you get. And jumping onto other players for leverage is encouraged. I would thoroughly enjoy the fights that would break out because of this.

Another task would be to use a map to make their way to a servo for a slurpee. The catch is that they will be required to pass through multiple alleyways. Also, the season is Spring, it’s swooping season mother fuckers. Let’s see how brave you are when birds chase you down the block. Personally I don’t think any of them would pass this test, maybe McDavid because the birds may not be able to detect a heartbeat.

Australian food would disgust them, I just know it. Things that they would need to try are a Bunnings sausage sanga, fairy bread, lamingtons, baked beans on toast, Milo and Vegemite. Because I’m me I would give them no butter with their Vegemite. 

An after thought I had was money so I’m editing this to include it. Everything here is EXPENSIVE so they would need to learn how to budget. Upon doing research, Canadians would be fine but the Americans will be mad.

1000 CAD = 1019 AUD

1000 USD = 1297 AUD

Another after thought was the fact that they won’t be able to drive (or at least drive well) here. We drive on the left and not the right, same goes for walking paths too. I can sense a lot of them bumping into people.

Where I think players would live based on vibes alone:

Carter Hart and Vince Dunn: North Shore Beaches, NSW. Daddy’s money. Carter probably did Nippers whereas Vince was a skater boy. 

Travis Konecny: Darwin, NT. Would 100% live there and enjoy it. He would try to conduct crocodile tours but gets assigned to feeding the baby crocs and doing shows for little kids. 

Tyson Barrie: Perisher, NSW. One of the only ski resorts we have to offer, major friendly mountain man energy.

Nolan Patrick: Byron Bay, NSW. @antoineroussel enlightened me, steering away from my original thought of Katoomba, NSW. Byron Bay is a magnet for hippies and links rainforest to the ocean. Chris Hemsworth and his family also live there.

William Nylander: Perth, WA. I don’t know much about Perth other than they wouldn’t shut up about partying while the other states had to quarantine. For some reason, I also associate Perth with Tik Tok. 

Sidney Crosby and Connor McDavid: Melbourne CBD, VIC. These two would live in the same apartment building in the city, Connor one level above Sidney. It’s the most boring looking block of them all and Crosby would send in complaints to the landlord about McDavid pacing during the night.

Tyler Seguin: Surfers Paradise, QLD. Party central, not many people are actually from this area and he would be sure to tell absolutely everyone that he was. I also think he would get a Meter Maid tattoo, specifically on his leg. Has definitely slept on the beach before because he couldn’t find his way home.

Jamie Benn: Hobart, TAS. Tasmania is usually forgotten about. Another one with mountain man energy except he is more creepy than friendly.

Mitch Marner: Fitzroy, VIC. @antoineroussel is responsible for this one too. Hipster central, makes you question how the hell someone so young can have so much money. Would chug $45 wine and not blink an eye.

(honourable mentions include = Sammy Blais: Hobart, Tas. Once again no comment on Tasmania. TJ Oshie: Cairns, QLD. Would do reef tours. Haydn Fleury: Western Sydney, NSW. Haydn would 100% own a ute or a white holden commodore and you can’t tell me otherwise. Roman Josi: Adelaide, SA. Small town history teacher vibes.)

I have attached a handy map for those who may need it.

In conclusion, the NHL should send their players over here to teach them some manners and while they’re at it, management should bring themselves too. Nolan Patrick could pass as an Australian if he built up a tan. (So does Nylander in this picture but we won’t talk about that.) Come over anytime baby, I’m free. 

Glossary

Servo - A service station, also known as a petrol or gas station. Example: 7/11

Theme park - An amusement park. Can be said in reference to both normal parks and water parks and usually means those in QLD. Example: Six Flags

Swooping season - August to October in Australia. When birds attack and chase humans and / or pets for getting close to their babies. Magpies are notoriously bad for this. 

Bunnings sausage sanga - A cheap feed / meal found at the front of a hardware and gardening store called Bunnings. Made up of white bread, sausage, onion and your choice of sauce.

Fairy bread - White bread with margarine and topped with 100s and 1000s / sprinkles. 

Meter Maids - Women who work along the beach dressed in gold bikinis. They top up parking meters to save tourists from getting fined and will often stop for photos. 

Nippers - Surf lifesaving programs carried out for children between 5 and 14. 

Ute - A pick up truck.

Eshay - A person who partakes in drug use, graffiti, listens to EDM and targets victims in groups. Below is the typical style of an eshay. 

Tagging a few friends so this doesn’t completely flop but feel free to ignore if it isn't your thing. I won’t be offended lmao

@scheifefe @ifiwasshawnmendesidslapmyself @d00dlebob @bowenbyram @kempe @prettyboyroope @quintonsbyfield @travisgermy @pitoftrash @kspitehockey @ballsakic @canadianheaters @bricksatlandyswindow @powerblais @brokeninsidebutnobodyknows @jamiedrysdales

[scripttorture]

I have a question about torture and organizations. Can a political movement (rebellion in this case) with a history of using torture succeed in eliminating its use of torture? In my story a member of the rebellion learns that some others (on the leader's orders?) have been torturing people. Appalled, this person decides to split off and form a rival faction, bringing with them other rebels who disapprove of torture... (organizations ask 1/3)

Is it likely that this faction would be able to succeed (replace the original faction and continue not torturing people)? How likely is this? What factors would impact the likelihood? Mostly I'm focusing on the contrast between one organization torturing and the other not torturing, e.g., I can see how locals might be skeptical of the second organization because they're on the same "side" as the torturers. (organizations ask 2/3 -- I think I might've accidentally numbered the first one 2/3, aah)  The organization uses torture for mainly punishment (which might include trying to get people to make false confessions) and intimidation (as well as in some cases in attempts to force compliance, like making people supply them with food and materials or making people give them information; this last is the rarest... oops, I just realized that's all of the purposes in the UN definition). (I have read a lot of your posts and I know torture doesn't work.) Thank you!! :) (organizations ask 3/3)

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Anon you are delightful.

 Rejali spends an awful lot of time discussing the various arguments on whether torture can be eradicated and how that could be practically done. There aren’t a lot of definite answers but I can give a summary of the kinds of factors that we think are important and describe things your characters could practically do.

 I think it’s worth stressing from the start that no country has completely eradicated torture. As a result we don’t know for certain what… works. Or at least not what works completely and permanently.

 I don’t think this means getting rid of torture is impossible. Neither does Rejali. Rejali argues (convincingly in my opinion) that torture has changed so drastically in the modern era because of concerted efforts to wipe it out. Part of that change has been an almost complete eradication of some torture techniques. As a general rule people are no longer broken on the wheel, hanged drawn and quartered or have their flesh torn off with red hot pincers. We have already completely transformed both torture and public attitudes to it.

 And that implies that we can get it rid of it.

 It’s likely that torture is less common now then it was historically but this is hard to prove. Most historical records don’t provide a clear indication of every single person who was questioned, arrested or tried, let alone who was tortured or how.

 It’s also hard to prove exactly how much a particular factor reduces torture. The fact torture is illegal and that victims may not report what happened to them make it difficult to measure how often it occurs. We rely on estimates based on the reporting we have, which is likely to give a lower figure then the real number of cases. (Because we know from more thorough studies on other crimes that there is always a proportion that goes unreported and it is likely this proportion will be higher when the victim could face repercussions for reporting the crime. As is often the case with torture.)

 So what seems to help? I’ll start by talking about the factors we’re aware of that can reduce torture and then I’ll try to talk about how you might be able to apply them to the revolutionary organisation in your story.

 It might sound obvious but making torture illegal is usually a necessary first step.

 A change in the law in and of itself does not really do much. Especially not overnight. It’s about beginning to build a framework where reporting can happen and where people are actively looking for evidence of torture.

 The next steps are well building up that framework. Independent oversight is one of the biggest things.

 Here are a couple of things that can mean:

Anonymous reporting

Independent inspections

Regular unscheduled inspections

Independent medical reports and autopsies

Treating reports of torture seriously

Thorough investigation of all reports

Prosecution of torturers where there is sufficient evidence

Sentencing that fits the gravity of the crime*

Suspension of individuals accused of torture

 I tend to think of those factors as things that are sort of outside the organisation. Because ideally they’re coming from outside the organisation.

 Note that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re outside the system entirely. Using a comparison if you’re trying to stop police torture then the people handling reports, investigations etc could still be government employees but they should not be police. When the people in charge of torture investigations rely on the people they’re investigating for their jobs and wages… you get problems.

 There are also important factors within the organisation. Which are about building an organisation where torture is less likely to occur (whereas the factors outside the organisation are about rooting it out when it’s found.)

 A lot of these things basically boil down to building a positive working environment:

High quality training for all personnel

Regular refresher training with updates to training as appropriate

Appropriate staffing levels (ie there should always be enough people to easily run the organisation)

No one is forced to work overtime

Generous holiday allowance and sick pay

Consistent effort to structure and manage things to reduce stress in the workplace

Reasonable, achievable goals for staff

Appropriate, well supplied facilities

Thorough record keeping for staff and anyone they are responsible for

Avoidance of shifts that disrupt sleep as much as possible

 Torture is much, much less likely when staff are correctly trained, supported and given the resources necessary to do their jobs.

 There are also a handful of things that would probably help and fall into neither category such as limiting (or eliminating) access to devices commonly used to torture. For instance Tasers, pepper spray, particular forms of restraints but also (depending on where in the world we are) chilli powder, hose pipes and cleaning supplies.

 This might seem like quite a lot but it’s funny how much of it applies to the industry I actually work in: drugs testing.

 The place I work is regularly inspected by outside organisations (and usually without notice). Every single person on site has to go through extensive training programs which are refreshed at least once a year. Each and every one of us has to record and account for all our actions and any material and equipment we use. We can report things anonymously. Any allegations of malpractice are dealt with swiftly and prompt massive investigations.

 So I guess I’m saying that I think more of the organisations responsible for people should have the same level of accountability pharmaceutical testing does.

 Depending on the structure of your rebel organisation and what’s available too them a lot of this might not be possible. At least not at first.

 A small, poorly supplied organisation could struggle to combat torture effectively. But where there’s a will there’s a way.

 Size of the group seems to be a big thing here. With really small groups the members can often say pretty confidently whether torture is happening or not. Because they’re all working together so closely that they know more or less everything their colleagues are doing. But the bigger a group becomes the easier it is to lose track of people and for abuse to be hidden.

 My instinct is that genuinely independent oversight probably becomes easier after organisations reach a certain size. Because for a smaller (but not tiny) group anyone who might be investigating accusations could still be reliant on the people they’re investigating. They’re likely to work together, be close to each other and as a result they’re bringing a bias into any investigation.

 I think a smaller, newly founded organisation would really struggle to set up the kind of structured, independent inspection bodies that do most of the grunt work of finding and reporting on torture. Especially early on when they’ve just split off from the older, more established group.

 That’s partly because of numbers and partly because it takes time and expertise to set up these systems. Or at least to do it well. Going back to the comparison with my work, the organisations that inspect and audit my workplace have all been around for decades. Most of the ‘younger’ organisations are mergers or rebrands of much older organisations. The process is updated at least once a year and there is a labyrinth of laws around every single aspect of… well all of it.

 It takes a lot of time, energy and error to build that up in a robust way.

 But that doesn’t mean there’s nothing they can do.

 They might not be able to detect or investigate torture easily in the early stages but they could structure their organisation in ways that make it less likely for torture to happen in the first place.

 Proper training is probably the biggest one that would make a difference. Things like conducting a proper investigation or interrogation, de-escalation tactics, building rapport/people skills and negotiation.

 They could also limit the number of prisoners they hold and the length of time prisoners are held for. This is trickier to do ethically in a combat situation. If part of the point is that this group is more ethical they shouldn’t be maiming or summarily executing surrendering troops from the opposing side. They also shouldn’t be releasing prisoners in places they’re likely to die.

 One potential way around this is to focus on destroying equipment and facilities rather then ending lives. Taking weapons, destroying barracks, supply lines and the like.

 Captured enemy troops can potentially give out valuable information (you can read about effective interrogation here) but the majority of useful information doesn’t come from interrogating suspects/enemy troops in these scenarios. It comes from people volunteering information, whether they’re civilians or defectors.

 It might sound really obvious but a very easy way to avoid torture as an issue to not have anyone to torture. A policy of no prisoners, not in the sense of killing everyone but in the sense of immediate release after the goal has been achieved, reduces the amount of people held and hence the chance of torture.

 This sort of strategy in the beginning could give the organisation time to come up with the facilities, training program and inspection regime needed to keep prisoners in… as safe and ethical a way as possible. It would mean adopting a strategy of ambush style attacks on the facilities and supply lines of he opposing side/s.

 It would also help avoid overcrowding of any prison facilities which is a factor that leads to more violence in prisons.

 I think that just leaves the question of long term success which you’ve defined in terms of avoiding torture and eventually replacing the rebel group that tortures.

 That isn’t a question I can give a definitive ‘yes or no’ answer to. It depends on a lot of factors, as you can probably see from the lists above.

 My instinct is that it is possible. However it would take time. A lot of time. And it would mean keeping up that dedication, the rejection of torture, throughout.

 Supplanting an existing organisation would take years. Easily 5-10 years, and I think I might actually be under estimating things. It also depends on things like how well known both rebel groups are, how well they manage to build up public trust, the supply of recruits, the amount of territory they occupy.

 Part of what I’m driving at here is that doing things well, building systems and organisations that last and keep ethics at their core; it takes time. It takes hard work. And a lot of it feels thankless.

 In the early days your rebels will probably be bending over backwards, making life so much ‘harder’ for themselves in order to avoid torture. Only to have civilians turn around and mistake them for the group that tortures.

 The sad fact is that a lot of people feel destruction is more satisfying. It feels like ‘doing something’, whereas the hard work of building a better system over years/decades… it often feels like you’re getting nowhere. I think that, along with the cultural message that violence ‘works’, is why a lot of these abuses continue to happen.

 Once again I think that what you want from this story is possible. But it isn’t simple, it isn’t easy. It’s playing the long game. And there will be times when that grinds the characters down.

 A lot of stories say that ‘doing the right thing isn’t easy’ and then proceed to show the characters doing some big, impressive act that instantly solves everything. This is a fallacy. Sometimes it’s a fallacy that leads to some great stories! But it’s still a fictional motif that romanticises acts of violence over the hard work of building something better.

 And I think that if you want to show that hard work in your story you can’t gloss over the fact that it’s hard. It’s exhausting, it can be isolating. It can all be wiped away at any moment because of one hot-headed idiot.

 But the hard work and dedication would eventually pay off.

 These rebels would end up with better intelligence networks, better ties to the local communities and a better reputation. Which would probably lead to them becoming the go-to group for defectors, both from the other rebels and the group they’re trying to fight. They’d also probably get more volunteers in the long term.

 Wrapping up I think I’ll end with a note from Kurlansky’s Nonviolence: The History of a Dangerous Idea: Long term victory generally goes to the group that is the most organised. Focus on that. Really think about inventive ways to set up the systems and organisations these rebels are trying to build.

 Follow those points through logically.

 Your group might not end up looking like any rebel group you’ve seen in media before. But it’ll probably look closer to a lot of real organisations and give you a lot of fodder for stories.

 I hope that helps :)

Disclaimer

Available on Wordpress.

*Obviously there will always be debate about what this means but I personally do not think most places treat torture as a grave crime. As an illustration of what I mean American torturer Jon Burge is thought to have tortured at least 200 people during his time as a police officer. Several of the people Burge tortured ended up on death row. Thirty years after the initial reports he was sentenced to four and a half years in prison. He served three and a half.