#and the effort of changing this to something else

[vroomvro0mferrari]

LN4 | Kiss and Make Up

Summary: You used to get along with your brother’s best friend, but at some point, it all changed. Lando’s rude comments frustrate you to no end, and your brother is fed up with your complaints. Max only sees one solution: you need to make up.

Lando Norris x Fewtrell!Reader (enemies to lovers)

WC: 5.0K

Warnings: cursing?

Masterlist

You heard the keys jiggle in the door, followed by the creaking sound of it opening, and your brother stomping through the hallway of your parental home. You finally have some time off from school after the insane amount of deadlines and exams that filled your last couple of weeks and decided to visit your family. You like studying and university, but it’s nice to come home and be taken care of instead of doing everything on your own. However, you’re still in charge of dinner tonight. You can never make it back home without being forced to make your famous lasagne at least once and tonight’s the night your family will be blessed with your famed, home-made dish. 

Max smiled when he saw you standing in the kitchen, chopping up the veggies for tonight. Although he’d never tell you directly, he had missed you. Max still lived close to your parents whereas you had moved further away for school. It made it difficult to see each other regularly, especially since Max had started Quadrant with Lando and didn’t make the effort to visit you anymore. Seeing you in person had become a rare occurrence, something that would only happen in his parents’ house.

Max put his hands on your shoulders as he leaned forward to watch what you were doing. “Hey sis, are you making lasagne?” He said with a smile.

“Hello Y/N, I’ve missed you. How are you doing? – I’m doing well, Max. Thank you for asking.” You mumbled as you continued to cut vegetables for dinner.

You couldn’t see it with your back towards your brother, but he smiled at your antics. “Hello my dear sister, I haven’t seen you in such a long time. I do wonder how you’re doing.”

You turned around and smiled when he pulled you into a hug. “It’s your own fault. You never come to visit me, but I’m doing well now that the exams are over,” you tell him with a chuckle.

Max decided to ignore your complaint, instead redirecting the conversation to what you were busying yourself with. “So, lasagne?”

You rolled your eyes. “Yes, Max. I’m making lasagne for dinner.” 

He silently cheered at your response. A cheeky smile made its way onto his face when he asked, “Is there enough for one more?”

“Depends… Who’s it for? P?” You said, looking back over your shoulder to meet his eyes as you cut up more veggies.

“Does it matter who I invited? You won’t let anyone else eat your lasagne?” He said with a laugh, but you knew the question was serious. He knew you didn’t particularly get along with some of his friends – actually, one of his friends, Lando. To say your relationship with Lando isn’t great would be an understatement. Max didn’t know why exactly you didn’t get along, you’ve never indulged him, but the dislike is clearly noticeable and has been going on for ages. Max had tried to improve the relationship in the past, but nothing had worked, only making it worse. He doesn’t understand why Lando, specifically; you don’t seem to have any issues with his other friends. 

You looked at Max pointedly; he was asking for something he already knew. Of course, you’d let people other than P eat your lasagne. There’s only one person that you wouldn’t allow.

Max sighed at your seriousness, “Yes, I’ve invited P,” he told you.

You smiled triumphantly, “Good! I’ve missed her; more than you, actually,” you said with a snort.

Max rolled his eyes at your comment. “I should never have introduced you two. You’re suspiciously close,” he mumbled as he shook his head, leaving the kitchen.

You grinned at his comment and continued to prepare dinner. You carefully cut the veggies, made the sauce and built the lasagne before you covered it with cheese. After you finally put it in the oven, you went to your room to freshen up. Of course, you cannot cut tomatoes without getting juice on your shirt, so clean clothes are a necessity. You quickly changed your shirt, reapplied your deodorant, and fixed up your hair before you heard the door opening, footsteps and voices following soon after. You smiled as you walked down the stairs, excited to see Pietra after months. You walked into the room, ready to hug your brother’s girlfriend, only to see his boyfriend making himself comfortable on the couch.

Your smile dropped from your face in an instant, and you narrowed your eyes at him. “Lando,” you said in a low voice. What on earth was he doing here? Your brother told you he’d invited his girlfriend, your friend; was she not here yet? Lando must’ve come to pick something up, right? He wouldn’t visit around this time unless he came to pick something up… Or come for dinner… Judging by how comfortable he had made himself on the couch, you doubt it’s the former.

“Y/N! How are you?” Lando said, getting up from the couch to properly greet you. You scoffed and folded your arms as he moved closer.

“What are you doing here?” 

“Nice to see you too,” Lando said with a smirk.

“I hope you’re not here for dinner,” you continue.

“I am here for dinner, actually. Max invited me.”

You shifted your eyes over to Max in anger. He’d told you P would be coming over, not Lando. The little bitch. 

“I take it P’s not coming, then?” It was evident in your voice that you were upset.

Max looked at you with apologetic eyes, like a child being scolded, as he avoided your gaze. At the lack of response, you turned your attention back to Lando.

“There isn’t enough food for all of us, and even if there was, it probably wouldn’t match your fancy diet anyway. Go buy a salad or something,” you told him, rolling your eyes.

Lando couldn’t help but smile at your response. “Such hostility,” he said, his hand resting on his chest in fake hurt, and a teasing grin on his face that made you want to slap it off.

You gritted your teeth at the teasing – God, this man frustrated you to no end, and he was enjoying it, too. 

“Fuck off, Lando. You’re not welcome here,” you said before walking away.

Lando was about to follow you into the dining room, unable to resist teasing you further, but Max stopped him. “Come on, man. Don’t provoke her. She’s already annoyed, especially because I lied to her.” 

You paced the dining room in an attempt to calm yourself down while the lasagne cooked in the oven. You grabbed the plates from the cabinet and started setting the table. You'd cooled off until you realised you’d have to set a place for Lando. You frowned as you stared at the last plate. Why couldn’t Lando just leave you alone? He should know not to bother you, you’d shown him before how petty you could be when he frustrated you, so why did he have to try again and again? Should you act like the bigger person, get over yourself and set the table for Lando, or should you 'forget' about Lando and set only four places? Your parents would be upset for sure, but the urge to retaliate is so strong. You stood still for at least a minute as you weighed your options. 

A smile crept its way on your face when you spotted the kids’ table in the corner of the dining room. Usually, it’s only used for big family events, when your much younger cousins come to visit. They don’t properly fit at the adult table and have their own tiny table in the corner of the room. A normal-sized human wouldn’t properly fit on one of the seats, but then again, Lando’s short, right? Besides, if he acts like a child, then he can sit at the children’s table. You grab the children’s cutlery and plate from the cabinet and set a special place for Lando. You can barely keep your laughter back at the thought of Lando sitting at the small table in a chair that’s way too tiny for him.

When you heard the timer beep, you tried to neutralise your expression. You placed the lasagne on the kitchen table before calling your family (and Lando) for dinner. Your parents were, unsurprisingly, the first to join you at the table. The boys, naturally, were still finishing up the game they started before dinner was finished. Your parents were already seated and provided with drinks before the boys came walking in. Although your parents hadn’t noticed the table in the corner or the missing chair, your brother noticed straight away.

He looked at you disappointedly as he said, “Y/N, did you seriously not set a place for Lando?”

“No, I did. It’s right over there,” you said, pointing to the kids’ table.

The boys looked in the direction you were pointing, and Max started laughing immediately. Meanwhile, Lando was shocked at how blunt you were being. So far, every retaliation you’d ever taken wasn’t that obvious. His eyebrows were furrowed in confusion and disappointment as he stared at the table – did you really dislike him that much?

“Where’s the other chair?” Max asked, still chuckling as he stood at the empty spot by the table.

You didn’t look up when you responded, “I don’t know,” shrugging your shoulders as you casually continued to divide the lasagne.

Lando sighed as he tried the chair, his knees pointing out above the table. Max only laughed louder at the image, and your dad couldn’t resist chuckling either while Lando pouted.

“I can’t eat like this.” 

“Then don’t. I told you you’re not welcome.” 

“Y/N!” Your mum scolded you before turning to Lando. “You’re always welcome here, darling. Ignore her,” she said, smiling sweetly at him.

You rolled your eyes.

“Where did you put the chair?” She questioned you.

You sighed, “They’re just in the pantry,” you admitted.

Your mum stood up and grabbed the chair for Lando who was still sitting in the tiny seat, while Max took pictures to post on his story, laughing. Lando smiled thankfully when she came back with the chair and grabbed a normal plate to serve him a generous portion of your homemade lasagne.

You couldn’t help but glare at Lando when he took his first bite. He was undeserving of the food into which you had put so much effort and love. You couldn’t even enjoy your own portion with the boy sitting across from you, although it tasted great. But Lando couldn't enjoy it either with the glares you kept sending him. Your resentment made him uncomfortable, and if he didn’t know any better, he’d be afraid that you’d poisoned his dinner. That was not your style though; he knew exactly how you liked to take your revenge. After all, he had experienced your wrath many times, and he had to admit you were very creative in creating your retaliations. He could never be entirely sure, or proof that you were the cause, but everything about the weird situations he’d been in the past years screamed your name.

There was one time that he’d gotten tens of phone calls every day for a week about a missing key. Even now, he gets occasionally gets calls about a key that was found. It seems quite innocent, but Lando’s phone was blowing up the entire week at the most inconvenient times: while he was in important meetings, when he was spending time with friends, even when he was streaming. Another time, Lando’s Netflix was completely messed up. All the recommendations on his home screen were for kids’ TV and romcoms. This, too, seems innocent enough, but after he had watched Netflix together with Daniel Ricciardo, and his homepage was filled with Cocomelon, The Kissing Booth, Riverdale and other films and series of the same genre, he had to hear about it for years to come. Some other time, Lando’s clothes mysteriously fell apart after only a few hours of wearing them after he’d stayed the night at Max's place at the same time as you. He didn't know how, but he was sure you had something to do with that too.

Although your reactions were very petty and often childish, Lando did admire your perseverance, resourcefulness and creativity. If he wasn’t always the victim of your crimes, he would have loved them, and perhaps even encouraged them, because, let’s be honest, it’s impressive if you can make someone’s clothes fall apart when you’re not even near them.

Lando didn’t really understand why he was always your victim, though. When you were younger, you’d gotten along fine, but as you’d gotten older you’d become meaner to him. He didn't know where things went wrong, and whether it was his fault or you just decided you were done with him. You used to tease each other, yes, but that was always mutual and lighthearted. Neither of you minded the comments that were made because you both knew it was all in good fun. At some point, you just started doing things like these, and Lando still doesn't know what initiated it.

You know exactly when it started, though. Everything was fine until Max and Lando hit puberty. Suddenly, they were ‘too cool’ to hang out with you, and you were excluded from all of their activities. The teasing didn’t really feel like teasing anymore, but rather mean comments that hurt you. Lando never caught onto your change in perception; he thought you still saw it as teasing. But the comments became more rude over time, and it felt like the boys who were your friends once, were now making fun of you.

Like when you were invited to apply for Honours College at your university. You were extremely proud that your grades in your regular courses were good enough to be admitted, and that you’d been invited to apply. But Lando just called you a nerd and laughed before continuing to talk about his own achievements, as if what you’d done was nothing important or impressive.

It wouldn’t have mattered much if it were any other friend of your brother, but Lando was important. You’d known him for about ten years, and he was basically a part of your family. What didn’t help either was that you had developed a small crush on him over the years. By the time he turned twenty, he’d gone through a glow-up. He finally learned how to deal with his curly hair and his face had matured to that of a handsome man. You were attracted to him, but his ugly personality distracted from his looks – most of the time.

Nevertheless, you wanted to impress Lando; to make him like you so he would stop with the off-handed comments. Though you weren’t necessarily good at sports or karting like he was, you excelled academically. You thought by showing your intelligence, you could gain his respect. Unknowingly, it made Lando feel dumb. He’d never even finished secondary school, and you were taking on extra classes in university without any troubles. He reacted differently than he would have liked to, but he thought you’d understand it was a joke.

Another time, you organised a last-minute surprise party for your brother. You had made sure there were decorations, music, food, and most importantly, drinks. You were happy with what you had managed to do in the time available, but your mood significantly worsened when Lando jokingly said you could have put in a little more effort. He was smiling when he said it, but it felt like he was making fun of you; of the amount of effort you had put in to make sure everything was organized as perfectly as possible. Despite his intention to tease, it didn't feel that way to you.

The comment that you believe triggered your best revenge was on Pietra’s birthday. She celebrated her birthday at Max’s apartment, and of course, you’d come to visit and celebrate with her. A few months before her birthday she’d shown you a top she really liked when she was online shopping, but the colour wasn’t right. So, for her birthday, you decided to crochet the top in her favourite colour. It was a bold choice because you didn’t have much experience crocheting, nevertheless, you tried. If she didn’t like it, you would just buy it from the store after all, or get her something else. You thought it looked pretty good, especially for your first try. Regardless, there were some mistakes and uneven shapes.

Pietra was completely surprised and elated with the present, especially when you told her you made it yourself. She knew how much time and effort it probably cost you to make it, but Lando didn't consider that when he commented on the piece.

“You made it yourself? Maybe you should practice a little more, huh?” He said, laughing, before handing it back to P.

You felt the smile drop from your face at the hurtful remark, but Lando was oblivious to the fact he hurt your feelings. Max turned to Lando in shock, while Pietra assured you that she loved the top, and couldn’t wait to wear it. You plastered a smile on your face, but it was obvious (to anyone but Lando) that it was fake. That night, after drinking your feelings away, you tore the seams in Lando’s clothes. Not every single one, but enough so it would fall apart after too much exertion; the punishment should fit the crime.

The anticipatory pleasure at the thought of Lando’s clothes tearing at an inconvenient moment was enough to satisfy you. When you heard about what happened a few days later from Max, you could barely keep your laugh back.

More recently, you had gone clubbing with your brother and his friends. It was an unusual event because your brother didn’t want to see you flirting or dancing with random boys in the club, but this time it was different. He knew you’d been stressed from school, and he’d rather you let loose when he’s there than when he’s not there to keep an eye on you. 

You were dancing with your brother and his friends when a cute boy came up to you, asking if he could buy you a drink. You said yes, of course. You would never refuse a free drink, especially in good, handsome, company, and you wanted to get over your small crush on Lando. You don’t know why or how, but he always seemed ten times hotter at the club, and you needed to get away from him. The longer you stayed near him, the more his pretty face and well-dressed body seemed to distract you from his unattractive personality, and that couldn’t happen. 

You followed the man to the bar and ordered a drink as he flirted with you. His attention was completely focused on you, but you kept getting distracted by the feeling of eyes on your back. It wasn’t until you were dancing in the middle of the large crowd that the feeling faded. You felt free without the supervision of your brother, and without Lando to distract you.

The man pulled your back closer to him, and you let him. You swayed from side to side with your arms in the air while he kissed his way down your neck. It didn’t feel right, but that didn’t matter; it was good enough. You liked the feeling of his lips on your neck and felt yourself get lost in the moment until suddenly there was a tug on your arm.

Your eyes opened in shock as you felt yourself get pulled away. The man you were dancing with didn’t seem to mind much and moved on with another girl standing nearby as you stared at Lando confused and disoriented.

“What do you think you’re doing?” You asked him as you struggled to pull your arm from his firm grip.

“I’m taking you back to the group, you need to be more careful,” he explained.

You scoffed, “What? I was perfectly safe! Let me go!”

“Were you? He seemed untrustworthy,” Lando continued as he pulled you through the club.

“I was just having fun! God, you’re so annoying!” You say with a huff before walking back to your brother.

Lando watched you as you walked away. He didn't want you to dance with that man, or any man for that matter, even though he would never admit it. However, you had misunderstood his intentions. To you it seemed like he was interrupting your fun, cockblocking if you will, and it frustrated you to no end. 

For days to come, you complained to your brother about what happened, insisting that it was none of Lando’s business and he should’ve left you alone. However, your brother grew tired of your complaints really quickly and couldn’t deal with your issues anymore. You’re ongoing dispute with Lando had dragged on for too long and it needed to be resolved, soon, before he went insane. During your next fight, Max would force the two of you to repair your relationship, whether you wanted to or not, because he simply couldn’t take it any longer.

It didn’t take long until your next fight. You were looking at pictures of Lando and Max on Instagram from when they went golfing a few days back when you spotted something. In one of the pictures, Lando was taking a photo with a camera, a camera which he had seemingly ‘borrowed’ from you without your knowledge. 

The second you saw him enter your parents’ house, you targeted him.

“You stole my camera?”

“Hello to you, too, Y/N,” he responded with a grin.

You rolled your eyes.

“Where is it, Lando,” you continued, stepping closer to him.

“I gave it to Max. He was supposed to give it back. He hasn’t yet?” 

“No, he hasn’t. And you shouldn’t have taken it in the first place.”

Your gaze shifted to Max, who walked in behind Lando.

“Where is it, Max?” 

“In my room somewhere, I think.”

“Can you go grab it? Please?”

The words you said were much kinder than the way you said them. Max sighed before walking up the stairs to his room, you and Lando in tow. He looked around the room, getting on his knees to look under the bed.

“You put my camera under your bed?” You asked angrily.

“I’m not sure if I did, that’s why I’m looking, Y/N.”

Max thought this was the absolute worst. He had gotten himself pulled into one of your arguments again, and now he was being yelled at by you when it wasn’t his fault to begin with. He sighed before getting up. 

“I’ll just go grab my phone for the flashlight,” he said before leaving the room.

You merely nodded in response as you continued to look around the room in search of your camera when you heard the door close, the lock falling in place.

“Max? Did you just lock the door?”

Lando lifted his head from his place on the floor, where he was looking under the dresser, at your insinuation. He quickly changed his position to sit up, staring at the door with you.

“Yes, I have. The two of you need to make up. I won’t let you out until you get along. I can’t handle the two of you fighting anymore. It’s really fucking annoying,” he said through the door.

You looked at Lando in shock, to find him already staring back at you.

“Max, you can’t do this! What the fuck is wrong with you! Let us out!” You yelled as you knocked on the door.

When he didn’t react, you hit the door again, “Max!”

You looked at Lando at the lack of response, “Do something!” You said, but he merely looked at you.

“What am I supposed to do? Knocking the door won’t help. I actually think it might be a good idea for us to talk everything out.”

You looked at Lando in shock. “Are you serious?”

He shrugged while he stared at you, and you shook your head in response.

“I’m not doing this,” you said, pacing around the room while Lando followed you with his eyes as he sat on your brother’s bed, an amused smile on his face.

“I’m leaving,” you said, opening the window.

“What are you doing?” Lando asks, quickly getting up from the bed.

“I’m leaving,” you repeated, sitting on the window sill, throwing one leg outside.

“What have I done to you to make you this angry? I can’t believe you’d rather fall out of a window than talk to me,” Lando frowned.

You let out a choked laugh, mouth open in shock. “Are you serious? You don’t know what you’ve done?” You said as you sat on the window sill, one leg outside the window, the other still on the floor.

“Yes. Please tell me, because I’ve obviously missed a lot if you’re willing to climb out of a window. By the way, stop climbing out of the window!” Lando said, all but running to prevent you from dangling your other leg out of the window too. It was already halfway there, leaving you in a very uncomfortable position when Lando grabbed your leg.

“You’re going to hurt yourself, Y/N!” 

“No, I’m not,” you grunted out as you tried to kick him away. You leaned away from him, losing your grip on the windowsill at the exertion. Lando could barely catch you before you fell out of the window. 

“Fuck, Y/N! I told you to get away from the window!” He yelled as he pulled you away from it and back into the room before quickly closing the window. He stood in front of it as if he was trying to block your way from the window, trying to block your escape.

You rolled your eyes at him, “Don’t be such a baby, I’m fine.” 

“Only because I was holding your leg.”

“If you weren’t holding my leg I wouldn’t have fallen in the first place.” You stepped closer to him, huffing in defiance. 

Lando sighed, but he didn’t respond. He kept silent while he stared at you, challenging you as you crept closer without breaking eye contact. The tension in the room was palpable, and it only increased the longer you stared at each other. Your breath was shallow from the adrenaline of your near-fall, and your glare was met with a look of annoyance. Lando’s hands hung limply by his sides, the complete opposite of a mere moment ago when he grabbed you with such urgency.

"Why do you always have to make things so difficult?" Lando's voice was low, strained with frustration.

"Me?" you shot back, your voice rising. "You're the one who's always so demeaning, so... so infuriating!"

"Infuriating?" Lando repeated, scoffing. "Coming from the girl who sabotages my Netflix and sets up kiddie tables for me?"

"You deserved it," you retorted, folding your arms and looking down. "You always mock me and belittle everything I do, every achievement, every effort… Do you have any idea how much that hurts?"

Lando’s confidence faltered at your confession. His eyes softened, and he took a small step closer, stroking your arm softly. "I never meant to hurt you, Y/N. I thought... I thought we were just joking around, teasing. I didn't realise-"

"Didn't realise what?" you interrupted, eyes brimming with tears. "That your words actually affect me? That I care what you think?"

Lando's hand reached out, tentatively brushing a strand of hair from your face. The touch was gentle, almost adoring, and it sent a shiver down your spine. "I'm sorry," he whispered, his voice barely audible. "I didn't know."

You closed your eyes, breathing out through your nose as you let the apology sink in. When you opened them again, the regret you saw in his eyes made you believe him. But it was the love and adoration in his gaze that convinced you.

"Lando..." you began, but your voice caught in your throat.

Before you could finish, Lando closed the distance between you, his hands cupping your face. His eyes searched yours for any sign of hesitation, but all he found was longing. Slowly, almost apprehensively, he leaned in, his lips brushing against yours in an uncertain kiss.

Your initial surprise was quickly replaced by the warmth spreading through your body. Almost automatically, your hands found their way to his shoulders, pulling him closer to you. The kiss deepened, filled with your pent-up frustration and unspoken feelings. Your hands slid up Lando's neck and you ran your hands through his hair, pulling on it softly. The sensation of Lando's hands on your body, and his lips against yours felt right, making everything else fade away.

When you finally pulled apart, both of you were breathing heavily. Lando’s forehead rested against yours, his eyes searching yours for any sign of regret. You could see the uncertainty in his gaze, and you were certain your eyes showed the same.

“What… what just happened?” you whispered, your voice shaky.

Lando sighed, running a hand through his hair, which was now slightly tousled from your fingers. “I don’t know. But it felt… right.”

You swallowed, trying to make sense of all of the emotions running wild inside you. “We can’t just pretend this didn’t happen, Lando.”

“I don’t want to,” he says firmly, his eyes locking onto yours. 

You laughed softly at the situation, leaning forward to rest your head against his shoulder. Lando wrapped his arms around you straight away. 

“This is not what I expected to happen,” you whispered.

Lando chuckled softly. “Me neither, but it’s not so bad, is it?” 

You snuggled into his neck, sighing contently once you were comfortable. No, it wasn't bad at all.

[pinkyqil]

Flirt // Jenni hermoso x r

Jenni was a flirt least to say she could flit with anyone as long has it as lips head and a body anything else wouldn't matter to her. So that why you felt really confused with your "relationship". with her cause she always gave you mixed signals that rarely made any sense to you.

One day she's all over you complimenting you, making you blush and all as it the usual Jenni package. next thing you know someone else is getting the same treatment that she gives or how she likes to call it "her delicate taste".

That made absolutely no sense to you but one thing you knew was that you were done. with anything that had to do with Jennifer hermoso you didn't want a part of it unless it was something serious. But it didn't look like it things where going to change with her so you thought.

You started pulling away from jenni it went from you two always partnering up to you straight up ignoring her and picking someone else as your partner.

To dismissing her and canceling plans that she made cause you knew it would be some different by tomorrow.

Slowly a hole formed in your friendship you both couldn't even spare each other a glance or a simple greeting.

The only time you would actually say a few words would be around game days where you needed to communicate with jenni but that wasn't something you both could do outside of work.

It honestly broke your heart to be pulling away from her like this. You missed her smile silly jokes that she would make trying to lighting up the room.how she would be there whenever you needed something or that you weren't feeling well she was always by your side like your order half.

Least to say jenni also felt the same way her heart felt incomplete like the other pieces to it was missing. but she knew one thing and it was to make it up too you for whatever she did cause her heart couldn't take you acting like she didn't exist.

The last few days you noticed Jenni putting in some efforts but you would always denie her and.

still continue shutting her out she tried everything from leaving notes and your favorites chocolate in your cubby opening the door for you. helping you carry heavy equipment without calling out for help but you wouldn't come forward.

It wasn't that you heated what jenni was doing you loved it all but your heart wasn't ready for what would happen if you guys where to talk it out.

Would things go back to the same way with how she was treating you or would you two become something. Was what you wondered.

Jenni's act had been going on forever but still she didn't get any improvement from you side always the cold shoulder and nothing more for her.

Today she jenni had planned to conner you when everybody as left as she knew you loved taking your time.

Your day went on with how it usual was Jenni still left you some notes and perfume in your cubby for when you arrived but you hadn't seen her anyway around the training grounds which was quite weird as she hung out with her group of people. But needless it was none of your busses.

You were tye last one to shower as everyone else had left or that what you think.you quickly dressed up and started existing the building until you felt a strange but familiar hands grab you by the waist.

It was none other than jenni she looked broken and hurt. All you could do was stare at her.

"What do you want hermoso". you asked her as you tried pulling your hands away.

" I just want to talk to you it would only take a few minutes". She said

"Well get talking cause I didn't have enough time to spend with you in my way".

She took a deep breath before speaking.

"I know that lately have been giving you on and off signals and just acting out as if you aren't important to me which is false so I just wanted' to tell you that I love you so much more than a friend we've both been through anything".

anyone can imagine and I just can't keep living like this knowing that j hurt you instead of protecting you so I just wan to apologize for that". She said as she took time to catch her breath.

"oh jenni you don't understand how long I waited for you to tell me how you feel cause I' also share the same feelings as you, I love you more than anything else that you can imagine"

and it hurt me a lot seeing how you would always treat me I love you jenni hermoso". You told her not expecting all that to come out of your mouth.

"So will I be able to treat you out to a date". She asked

"Yes you can have honestly seen the way that you've improved and I love it". you told her before tip-toeing and leaving a peck on her lips.

"You deserve it". You said

"I guess I do". She replied back

"So I'll see you saturday for dinner". She asked

"Definitely". You told as you walked away holding the notes that she had been living for you onto your chest.

Maybe luck was on your side after all and jenni wasn't just a flit after all.

A/n: hope y'all enjoy this read and if you see any mistakes no you don't cause I just finished writing this at 12:18 so mistakes shall be fixed later. anyway feedbacks, request and comments or if you want to chat with me inboxes are always opened and everything else is appreciated and don't forget to take care of yourself 💗

[soaringwide]

Pick a Card: What do you need to hear right now?

Hello and welcome back to a new pick a card reading!

Today is a general and open one, where we're going to look at What you need to hear right now.

As always this is a general reading meant for multiple people so it might not resonates 100%. There are only three piles and a shit ton of you. Takes what resonates and leave out the rest.

Check out my pinned post for more pick a cards or to book a paid reading.

PILE 1

Cards: 10 of Cups, King of Swords, 5 of Swords, the Chariot, the Empress, the Hanged Man, Queen of Cups, 4 of Pentacles, the High Priestess, Sweet Oblivion, Acceptance

Right now, you seem very preoccupied, by the idea of happiness and emotional fulfillment. I see you wanting more from life and not wanting to settle for your current circumstances. You are an idealist who wishes to enjoy life to its fullest, and I think that includes multiple areas of you life because you don't want to neglect any aspect of it.

But at the same time, there is this idea that your idea of ultimate happiness is an ideal, and ideals are not reality. Reality is uncertain and mysterious, we never know what's around the corner, and I think you're trying to get a hold of that by using your logic over your heart to try to understand and break down what it is you want from life. Truth is, when we want something, even when we get it, it never quite look like what we imagined, and that's quite a struggle when we want to control outcomes.

And I think you're fully aware of the fact that there are going to be some losses on your path towards this beautiful goal of yours. Perhaps you even have already experienced some. You might be wondering if that was all worth the effort in the end and feeling quite defeated on the inside. There might be frictions with you values and feeling like you have to sacrifice something dear to you.

However, despite these sour feelings, you feel like you have to stay determined to make it work and get out of the realm of what's known and comfortable. With the Chariot paired with the Empress, representing respectively Cancer and Venus, there is this idea of slow but unstoppable movement toward you ideal. It's really hard for you to let give up, unthinkable even. Both characters are crowned in stars, representing the hope for something better and the faith you have for yourself.

What you don't see, however, is that you are currently trapped in your own perspective and struggling to see things in a new angle. You are tied to the emotional baggage of your past and it's like you're trying to run away from the pain but you can't, you're stuck with it because its part of yourself, of your story. And I think to some extent you fail to see how these past emotions are affecting the way you see the situation. You learned to be very protective of your well-being, up to a fault because, right now, this inflexibility is creating struggle and pain where there is no need for it.

I also see that you're so focused on the prize that you're blinding yourself to everything else, which is part of why you are stuck in some way.

You advice regarding this situation is all about accepting that you cannot control everything, nor that you should. As we pointed out things will not always unfold the exact way you want them to, which is not necessarily a bad thing. You don't need to know everything, to see 10 steps ahead. It's okay to not know what you are doing, no one does. Yes you are doing that because you want to feel safe, but that's not how reality works. You can't trick your mind into thinking you have full control over your life, that's a delusion, and you're missing out on the mysterious adventure that is life.

So you need to let go a bit, surrender your desire for control and float through life with peace in your heart. What will be, will be. Some things cannot be changed with force and willpower alone. Some things are out of your control and all you can do is accept and let things unfold naturally. Right now you need to let loose a little and learn to have more faith in life and to trust that sometimes, the detours are exactly what we need to experience.

Key words: crisis of faith, winning at all costs, go big or go home, sunken cost fallacy, if i don't help myself then who will, crawling out of a hole, disillusionment, swimming against the current vs floating with it

PILE 2

Cards: King of Cups, Empress, 7 of Pentacles, the Hermit, the High Priestess, 3 of Swords, Ace of Wands, 7 of Cups, 8 of Pentacles, the Hanged Man, 3 of Cups, 8 of Swords, Rebirth

What you're being asked to look at today, is your emotional balance and the emotional work you've done on yourself to nurture and repair. It seems you've been working at it for quite some time, steadily and patiently. You've been caring for yourself, healing, like a gardener working in his orchards day after day, waiting for the harvest to finally come.

And you did quite well it seems! A lot has been accomplished already. You've done the work and sought inner knowledge; with bravery you looked at every shadow, every past hurt, every trauma, and you've learnt so much from it. You really consciously took the matter into your own hands and were directly acting on your issues. It still hurts at time though and you might be wondering when it will cease to be painful. Truth is, you keep touching the wound so it's probably not helping. I see you quite stuck in waiting for this harvest, the harvest being the point where you feel finally free from all of this ready to seize life again.

You also went through a time of isolation that made you stronger, but I'm also getting that you're struggling to get out of that isolation mode out of comfort and fear mostly. Sometimes when we go through something hard, it makes us feel alienated from others, like it's hard to relate to the everyday problems of people who were lucky enough not to go through something traumatic. It can make you feel envious, or at the very least, a bit disgusted and void of interest to connect with those people, because they just don't get it, and honestly, some people lack the emotional intelligence necessary to handle people who suffered a lot…hence the isolation.

What you don't see, is that you're ruminating your problems and that it's past the point of being helpful. It's like you're going over it again and again and again, trying to see if you can find yet another answer that would end the search once and for all. You're clearly overthinking your feelings and obsessively trying to find a solution to something that has none. What is done is done. Yes you need to mourn, yes you need to let time and introspection sooth the pain, but at some point, the only thing left to do is to move forward again.

The advice regarding this is that you need to drastically change your ways. Flip the way you live on its head. The cards point at getting out of this isolation mode, because the only thing holding you back is yourself in this case. It's like you're scared of going out into the world. You might not feel ready. You might not feel strong enough. You might not feel adequate for this world. But it's not true, it's just another result of overthinking your past hurt. It's time to step out and connect with other people. Celebrate, have fun, laugh, connect with others sincerely and without fear of not being understood. Yes some people won't get it but you'll also be pleasantly surprised by others, and you won't know until you tried.

It's time to leave the old behind, the old being those past hurt you're so familiar with, and this way of being you became so used to contain yourself in. You've spent enough time in the cocoon, now is time to break free from it and spread your wings. It might not be easy in the beginning, you might need to learn to fly again and it will be scary, but it's so, so worth it.

So ask yourself what living your life fully looks like to you. If you were completely free if nothing was holding you back, what would you want to? What would you want to become? Switch the overthinking from the tiny box you stuck yourself in, to the expansiveness of a mind that wants to reach to every corner of the world. The sky is the limit and it's time you look up.

Key words: breaking the shell, chrysalis, rebirth, being stuck in a maze of your own creation, scared to open up, meaningful connections, sunlight, removing the bandage

PILE 3

Cards: 6 of Pentacles, 6 of Swords, 2 of Cups, 2 of Swords, 2 of Pentacles, 10 of Cups, Page of Swords, 3 of Cups, 5 of Swords, 7 of Swords, 10 of Pentacles, 8 of Pentacles, the Great Goddess, Spirit of the Tree

The theme of your reading today is centered around the way you connect to others, be they people or spiritual forces.

More precisely, in the act of service you do for others, with a strong emphasis on keeping the balance in the exchange and the necessity to preserving the harmony between your thoughts and feelings.

With two 6 cards in this position, this highlights reflecting on the way you find the middle point in the way you give and receive your time and energy, but also what it costs you mentally and emotionally. This is a general reading so it's quite nebulous without context, but to some it could point at a specific relationship, or if you're someone who provides service for others, it could point at that, and it could also be relevant for those who do spiritual work.

In any case, what you're clear on in this situation, is that you've reached a point of no return. It's just no possible to keep doing things as you're doing them right now. You've been contemplating this recently and reached the conclusion that you can't make everyone happy at all costs, despite your desire for things to be perfect for all involved. You are sacrificing yourself in the process, to an extent that is not healthy for you. Exchanges between people are never fully balanced and that's just reality, but in the long run you should find some type of balance and not just giving yourself to keep everyone happy but yourself.

What you don't see in this situation is that you're getting the short hand of the stick when it doesn't have to be the case. If every interaction feels like a battle that you have to fight to sourly win, then was it really a win? Others can be here for you as well, for support and enjoyable shared moments. You should be able to all get something from this. If they never give you that, is it truly worth investing yourself in it?

There is a strong need for protecting your boundaries mentally as well. You don't see how letting others step all over you is detrimental to the way you perceive life. It maintains you in your little box where you need to expand your horizon. I think you somewhat lost that side of you. The side that seeks truth, that is strongly rooted in its individuality and critical mind. The you that seeks mental stimulation and adventurous ideas.

For the advice, you need to be honest with yourself because from what I understand, you do see the situation clearly, but for some reason, you're not acting on it. It's like you're lying to yourself a bit. You keep trying to make things work in this very unbalanced state, harming yourself in this task for the sake of others.

You need to look further and think of your abundance and legacy. What will you be remembered for? For what you did to others? It's very noble of you, but what about your enjoyment of life? What about your personal goals? What about what your heart desires?

Think of trees: we now know that despite being fully rooted in themselves and being whole and independent life forms, they do live in community and are able to communicate with each others across species and help each other. The big tree provides shade to the small plants, and the small plants keep the ground moist and fertile. They all benefit from this and create an ecosystem for all to live in.

You are being called to re-balanced things within you and in your life. To get to the root of this blockage you have regarding exchange and service in order to transform yourself. Perhaps what you're doing is actually detrimental to your ultimate goal, and being a bit more focused on yourself, selfish, even, would be the key for more stability.

Key words: giving and receiving, overworking yourself, beneficial selfishness, harmony between extremes, losing yourself in the work, waking up to what matters to you, long term goal, the wisdom of trees, creation and destruction

[adora-but-ginger]

Ardently Yours

ardent (adjective): to fall into strong feelings for or to develop a crush; to begin to love

pairing: spencer reid x psychic! gender neutral reader

synopsis: the four times where you almost call spencer by his first name, and the one time that you do

warnings: typical cm talk and discussions, a quick undercover case, spencer reid is NOT straight, honestly assume that any character i write for isn't straight, food mentions, swearing (probably), nervous spencer at the end, me having a bias towards glasses reid

masterlist

word count: ~5k

a/n: here is the next installment for my psychic reader collection! i spent a lot of time and effort on this one, and i have not written something this long in awhile, so i hope you all enjoy it as much as i do!

want to be tagged? let me know!

not proofread whoops again

credit to gif owner!

i.

"Why do you drink coffee when you don't even like it?" You were by the kitchenette as Spencer rolled up for his morning caffeine fix, caught off guard by the realization that he wasn't alone.

He turned to you, adding sugar into his beverage. "Caffeine is a stimulant that increases your brain and nervous system's alertness. We work really odd hours. I don't understand what you're asking." The flow of sugar didn't stop until he was almost done talking, your eyes widening every second he kept pouring.

"Yes but aren't there other drinks that get the same result? Why coffee when you obviously don't like the taste?" You watched as he stirred the sugar-with-a-dash-of-coffee drink together, combining the ingredients.

He shrugged as he pushed up his glasses to sit better on his nose. "It's what's easily available."

"Hmm." You scrunched your eyebrows together. "Do you like tea?"

"I much prefer tea, actually." A wisp of hair fell in front of his face, and you were tempted to push it away. You weren't going to, that was absurd. But you were tempted. You had just reached a truce not too long ago and put your differences aside, meaning you had to make every moment count if you wanted to keep the peace.

Reid surveyed the room before continuing, as to watch for any possible intruders. "Last time I walked in with tea though, Morgan commented on my cup and would only talk to me in a horrible British accent the rest of the day." A small smile crept onto his features. "Learned that lesson quite quickly."

Now that you didn't seethe at the sight of him, you were able to read Reid better. Six months into the BAU now and you were able to have civilized conversations with the genius, progress that you valued as you got to know him. He was skeptical of what you could do with your mind still, but at least he was less vocal about it.

Something was different this morning though, but that may just be on your side. Because at seven a.m. sharp Spencer walked into the bullpen with those frames of his adorning his face, something that he hadn't done since the first month you were here. Why was that a problem? Because you couldn't keep your eyes off of him.

Maybe it was the change, or maybe it was something else, but you were put into a daze the first few seconds you saw him.

You came back to reality just in time for him to make his leave, and you made the collective decision to make a pit stop on the way in tomorrow if there were no cases announced today. You needed a change of pace in your morning routine anyway. At least, that's what you told yourself as you walked back to your desk, getting Emily's attention before striking up a riveting conversation with her regarding her weekend plans.

--

The next day when you walked into the office, you were balancing two drinks, one pastry, and a load of anxiety in your hands. You were the first one there, showing up a half an hour early as Spencer appeared twenty minutes early on the dot without missing a day. You had stopped by the café next to your apartment on your way here, getting yourself a drink and ordering a tea for Spencer that felt right. You didn't know what he usually had, but your mind searched his the day before to get a good grasp of the basics.

You knew that he had a big thing with germs (which was completely justified) and so you delicately laid down a folded napkin as a coaster for his tea before writing a little note of what it was. You signed with your initials before rounding to your own desk, just in the nick of time. You glanced down at your watch as it struck twenty-to, and watched nonchalantly as Reid walked into the office, immediately noting your presence and giving an awkward wave. The rest of the team filed in not too long after, and before you knew it you had lost a few hours to paperwork. It wasn't until midday that you felt a presence near your desk, the energy telling you it was Reid before you even looked in his direction.

"You got me baked goods. And a drink. Why?"

"The tea is caffeinated, and it's green--I know some people have sensitivities to other bases but usually green is a safe bet. It was no big deal, I had a couple punch cards that I turned in for free goodies so please don't think you owe me anything."

He awkwardly leaned against the side of your desk, trying to find a place to stick his hands. "Why did you do it?"

"Why do you think I did it?"

"I'm not sure. I looked up the shop on the cup and it's ten minutes in the opposite direction from here, you didn't go out of your way did you?"

Yes, you totally did. "No not at all, it was on my way."

He squinted at you, knowing you were telling a fib but not confident enough to call it out.

"Plus, I get the feeling you like pastries of the sort."

A smile flashed across his face. "I do, actually, the one you got is my favorite type."

You shot him a wink. "I thought so. You like the drink too?"

His shoulders slumped into a more relaxed response as the conversation went on. "I did, I never had that type before, but it was quite nice. The flavors were all very balanced, and I appreciated the sugar packets you brought along with it." He stood up, beginning to head back to his desk. "Thank you."

"Anytime Reid."

Were you there long enough to use his first name? It was a tricky thing, names, because some didn't mind being on a first-name basis from the get-go, but Reid was different.

It almost fell from your lips just then too, as he was walking away.

Maybe today wasn't the day, but you hoped soon it would be.

ii.

You were called into a case before you could finish your Saturday morning routine, and by midday the jet was taking you to Kentucky. with the woods surrounding you on pretty much all sides. That plus the humidity ever present equaled a very irritable team.

It was two days in when the profile was given, but your focus was on one of the local cops at the department. You didn't want to make it a big deal, but your incessant glaring was clearly making him uncomfortable. He was hiding something. Prentiss was the one to cue you first, nudging your arm after realizing you weren't letting up on your stare down.

"What is it? Everything alright?" She crossed her arms as she followed your line of sight.

"Yeah, it's just something's off."

"What's off?" Spencer appeared seemingly from nowhere and perched himself on your other side.

"Oh, hey Reid." Emily nodded in your direction. "They're reading Mr. Cowboy Boots over there." Sure enough, the cop had a pair on that did not match the uniform at all.

"His aura is different." You squinted as he gathered up some paperwork. "Most of the people in this office have an uncomfortable energy, but his is just...different. Not a good different either." A moment of silence filled the air. "Plus, I hate that toupee of his. It looks like a joke." He turned towards the three of you and you all glanced in separate directions, trying but failing to look like you hadn't just been studying him.

"The way he flows just doesn't match the energy of the others, and I'm going to figure out why."

"How can you tell?" Spencer looked from the man in question to the other locals, trying to understand an inch of what you were saying.

You kicked off from the wall you were slouching against before starting on your way towards him. "I just can. Give me a minute." And off you went.

You just needed to strike up small talk with him, really look into his eyes to try and uncover your rising suspicions. You were in earshot of Emily and Reid still, and it didn't take you long to understand why you were feeling the way you were.

Nodding as an exit cue, you booked it toward your two coworkers. "Call Garcia." You closed your eyes for a second, focusing your thoughts. "He knows the unsub. I don't know how, but either through friendship or familial ties, Boots over there is familiar with these murders.

"All you did was discuss tomorrow's weather, how can you know?" Spencer looked at you, confusion written all over those chiseled cheekbones.

You hummed as you reached out to flick an invisible piece of dust from his sweater vest. "His heart, it tells a story. A story of betrayal, of protecting a secret. Not like a typical hidden truth, but something much, much darker. He's inserting himself into this case as much as he can because of it." He reached for his found to send Penelope your info, no matter how apprehensive he was about it. You could tell he was unsure, but if it meant getting one step closer to catching this killer, he wasn't going to question it. Not now at least.

He picked up his phone, adjusting his glasses as he did so. "Hey, Garcia? We need you to check something out."

Emily went to relay the information to Gideon, and you took a moment to admire the boy genius. You had to admit that ever since you two started getting along, you were seeing him in a new light. A light that you wished minded its own damn business. His awkwardness was adorable, and when he showed up to the case today wearing those glasses of his, well, you had to pencil in a cold shower for later.

Whether he knew it or not, he truly was gorgeous.

You weren't planning to acknowledge those feelings anytime soon though. There was a killer on the loose and this was the last thing you needed to be thinking about right now.

"He hasn't slept since the beginning of the case either. Those bags under his eyes are days old and he--" Spencer stared at you as he telephoned your information to Garcia's side. "He has a grass allergy. That last part isn't important, I just needed to let someone else know that I knew that too." You mumbled the last part of yourself, looking briefly out towards the cloudy evening.

He turned towards you, shooting you a confused look. He covered the phone with his hand. "You can tell if someone has an allergy?"

You shrugged. "Yeah, I guess I can." You squinted your eyes at him, and you two had worked together enough now that he knew you were reading him. "You're allergic to pollen." The lack of reaction from him was reaction enough. "And peaches? Cantaloupe, too."

The corner of his eye twitched, and you smirked at your victory. He resumed his attention to the phone. "Garcia, they're freaking me out again, reading my mind."

Maybe you two were friends. Friends call each other by their first names, right? You silently tested it out on your tongue.

Gideon's voice grabbed the two of you's attention before his name could fall from your lips.

iii.

You were not a fan of going undercover. It was a part of the job that you thankfully didn't have to exercise much of, but whenever the opportunity arose, you did your best to avoid it. It was uncomfortable, especially when you fit the victimology to a tee. You had a weapon tucked away as a fail-safe, but there you were, sitting alone in a bar with a glass untouched in front of you.

Act as though you had a fresh break-up, he's going after people who seem heartbroken.

Make sure not to draw too much attention.

Let us know the moment he leads you out. Click the pen and we'll be sent an alert.

You were a decent actor, but it felt weird knowing that you were practically bait for this case. It didn't help that you hated the bar setting, the sticky floors, questionable seats, and dim lighting. Not to mention they were always overcrowded whenever you went. No, you'd much rather be at home, or honestly anywhere rather than here.

"Any updates?" Reid's voice sounded through your earpiece, relaxing you a little. The team was strategically placed outside the establishment, with Spencer also somewhere within the pool of people inhabiting this bar. Back-up, he called it, though you were pretty sure that you'd be a better shot than he was. Plus, he hated this setting even more than you. So why was he here?

You tried to search for him, attempting to find the brunette in the mass of people. You caught someone's eyes in the process, quickly locking theirs with your own before moving on.

Here we go.

The man fit the profile to a tee, and noticing that you were alone started to make his way to you.

You swirled your drink in your hand as he sauntered up to you. Even if you weren't here undercover, you wouldn't go near this guy with a jousting pole. Time to put on the charm.

"Well hey there, you look lonely."

You put on an overly friendly smile. "Oh, you're too kind."

"Mind if I take a seat?"

One glance at him and you knew. This was your guy. You clicked the alarm disguised as a pen, and now you just had to get him out of the bar. "Go right ahead."

It took ten minutes before you could get anywhere, and by the time you convinced him to leave with you, you wanted to retch--his grubby hands were laying on your shoulder, rubbing it as he walked alongside you, other hand on the small of your back.

You were definitely making sure that as a reward for putting up with this, you had your paperwork covered for at least a week.

One moment you felt the fresh evening air, the next you heard shouts from all sides. But then you felt cold metal against your neck, and you realized this was going to take a little longer than expected. This is exactly why you hated going undercover.

"Put the guns down or they get it." You hadn't been on this side of the job yet, being held hostage with your teammates staring down the possibility of what one wrong move could mean.

"Statistically, killers like you try to take the path of police-assisted suicide in a situation like this, but you can make it out with a life sentence if you're smart about it. Either way, you'll never see what life looks like out of cement walls." Reid's voice sounded from behind you, as you welcomed the wave of relief that swept over you as his voice hit your ears. "Choose wisely."

You sensed it before it happened. You kicked his kneecap in as he went to swipe at you, and though you ended up with pain lightly searing against your clavicle, there Reid was, handcuffing him before handing him over to Morgan.

Spencer noticed your wound and moved towards you. "Is it deep?"

You shook your head. "No, just stings."

"I had eyes on you the entire time. I know it was really busy in there, but I was there. Just in case. I didn't lose you, you were safe." He waited a second before continuing. "Let's go get that cleaned up, it's pretty nasty looking."

You sent a smile at the man. "Thank you. Seriously, Spen--"

Gideon called both of your names before you could finish the sentence, leaving his first name still unknown on your lips.

iv.

The weather was just starting to clear again. It wasn't humid in D.C. and the temperature was at a steady rise, though it was still bearable. You had been talking with Hotch about weekend plans, which you had to admit was a little odd.

It wasn't that you and Aaron didn't get along, per se, but you two had just never sought the other out during non-work hours. He was telling you about his partner, Hailey, who sounded lovely. You'd never seen the man as lively as when he was talking about her.

"And then she offered to go to the art gallery to see the new exhibit, which I didn't even know about."

"You like art?" You were leaning against his desk with a cup of coffee in hand.

"I do. What about you, any events planned?"

You shook your head. "No, just me and my fish catching up on some reading hopefully."

"You know Reid reads too?" Hotch looked over to the man of the hour who was coincidentally staring back, quickly glancing away as if caught.

"Reid reads. There has to be a pun in there." You snorted at your words, shrugging afterward. "He reads books that I have no interest in though, and I distinctly remember hearing about his disdain for fiction, which is my forte."

"I'm sure if you asked him, he would." He paused for a moment before shuffling some papers. "You two could start your own book club."

This was the thing with Aaron, you could never tell if he was joking.

"In fact, he's coming this way now." Surprise scribbled onto your face as you turned to look behind you. Sure enough, like he'd been summoned, there was Spencer striding over. His contacts must have been picked up because he was bare-faced today, which made no difference to you--your heart still skipped a beat. You noticed he was giving off lots of nervous energy as he approached, though from the outside he looked relatively relaxed.

"Why are you nervous Reid?" Never one to beat around the bush, you were.

That relaxation quickly dissipated as he looked towards you and Hotch. His eyes met yours. "How do you--never mind. Do you have a second?"

You nodded. "Hotch, tell me how the exhibit goes, yeah?" With a nod from Aaron, you met Spencer halfway, motioning him to lead the onward. "What's up?"

He didn't speak until you got to his desk. "First, before I say anything, know that I do not mind at all if you say no."

"Okay...?" You watched him skeptically as he fiddled with his hands, looking at you every few seconds before surveying the room. "What, are you about to ask me on a date or somet--"

"I have two tickets to the star show they're hosting at the planetarium on Saturday, and I know that you love the constellations. I've been once before and it was really nice, they tell you all about the patterns and legends behind each one and I think you'd really like it. Penelope suggested I ask you since you usually are relatively free on the weekends, which isn't a bad thing of course. In fact, I don't usually do much on the weekends besides going to the park and playing chess with the regulars there." He was rambling, truly on edge about how'd you respond. A smile started to rise on you. "It's later in the evening so when you leave the planetarium you can see the stars in question, but it's not too far from my place and you do not have to go if you're busy or don't want to, I just thought I'd ask."

His eyes were wide as you ate up every one of his words. His voice was like the harmony of your favorite song--you loved to pick it out and listen to how each of the words he spoke flowed. His face had a tint of rose on it, and a piece of hair had fallen into his eyes. You had to once more withhold from pushing it back into place.

"I would love to go, where would you like to meet?"

Shock was written all over his features at your accepting of his invitation, and you were pretty sure he was already preparing a proper response to a rejection when you said your words.

"You want to go?"

A nod accompanied you. "Yeah, you can teach me all about the science and I can teach you all about your star sign."

He shot you a quizzical glance before relaxing his shoulders. Man, he was really tense. "Okay. Okay, great! I can send you my address. We can walk there from my place, it's only about ten minutes away. It's at 7 pm, does that work?"

"Works perfect for me." A thought popped into your head, one that could make this outing seem to be much more than it really was. "That's a little past when I eat, want to grab dinner beforehand?"

He scrunched his eyebrows at you. Uneasiness started to form in your belly, maybe you were being a little too bold. "What type of dinner? Restaurant dinner or takeout dinner?"

"We could do takeout? You said you know a 24-hour Thai place around here, right? It's one of your favorite places in the area."

He was almost caught in a trance then, looking nearly through you, staring at you with an expression you had never really seen on his face before. "You remembered that?"

"Of course I did, I remember things about the people I care about."

He couldn't speak for a second after your words. Yeah, you were definitely being too bold.

"You--" His voice cracked and you almost chuckled as he cleared his throat. "--I'll grab some food from there before we head out. Want to stop by around six?"

"Six it is. See you there, boy wonder." You shot a wink his way. "And thank you for the invite, I cannot wait to go." His first name was on the tip of your tongue, ready to spill out at the slightest egging on. He looked almost expectantly at you and you had to remind yourself of where you were and who you were with.

This wouldn't be considered a date, would it?

v.

Spencer totally thought this was a date. He could count the number of dates he'd been on on his hand, and most of them were with Ethan. It'd been a while since he'd gone out, and he was nervous.

What if he was overdressed? What if he was underdressed? What even was the dress code for the night? What if you didn't show up?

He tried to not let that last thought get to him because if it did then he would spiral and would all in all not have a good time tonight. This wasn't platonic, right? He didn't think it was. Did you? Did--

A knock at his door interrupted his ruminating. He scrambled to make sure he looked presentable, heart practically thrumming against his rib cage as he did so. There was just one problem.

He couldn't see.

It wasn't that he hated how he looked with his glasses on, but it made him feel self-conscious and he hated to wear the frames outside of his house. The only problem was that the last of his contacts had dried out, and he really wanted to look nice for your guys' outing. He could not see more than five feet in front of him for his life, which in retrospect kind of ruined the whole point of looking at the stars.

That didn't matter in his mind as long as it impressed you. He knew that he shouldn't dress to impress, but you and your alternative methods of profiling had snuck their way into his brain and refused to leave. He thought about whether you'd do the daily crossword with him almost every morning. He made sure to always bring an extra morning snack in the case that you got hungry. Hell, he was writing to his mother about you.

He was in much farther than he knew.

A second round of knocks sounded at the door.

He opened it after looking through the peephole and nearly lost his breath.

You were stunning, and he felt more out of his element than he had in years.

Wow, he was really in deep.

"Phew, I thought I had the wrong address at first. I am so ready for some Thai and stars!" You entered his place, but his mind was still a few steps behind. "This place is beautiful, and so...you!" Neat piles of books were stacked in rows alongside his couch, and as he went to readjust one's positioning his lack of visual clarity made him trip.

Great.

You rushed over to him, careful to keep your distance but still close enough to offer help if he asked. "Woah, are you alright there?"

"Yeah, I-I just must've not seen where I was heading." He could feel the dust adorning his cheeks. He was totally making a fool out of himself. "Please, take a seat at the table, the food is still hot."

You smiled and nodded, taking in the contents of his home whilst sitting down. He went over and grabbed the Thai food, bringing it over to the table. He set the food down and went to sit, not knowing that this was the moment before a disaster. One of the chairs must not have been fully pushed in, and with the combination of his nerves, and his blurriness, his foot got caught right over it as he went to sit across from you.

Now, you fully respected and understood Spencer's hatred of germs, so you'd apologize later for coming to the rescue. That being said, you sensed it a half a second before it was going to happen, stood up, and reached out to catch him.

"Oh my god, are you okay?" His arms were on yours, bracing them for stability. "What's wrong? Are you sick?" He could feel your eyes looking him up and down for any signs of maladies. "We can reschedule and go another night if something's wrong." He really did not want to admit the reasoning behind his clumsiness. "I can take you to the doctor's if you're feeling ill." Now he definitely had to expose himself. How would he even explain this to a medical professional?

Oh hey doc, I got told repeatedly that I look better with contacts and now the one time I need them I don't have them which ironically is the one night in years that I had to chance to go out with someone who I think I'm starting to really like so can you please give me a fake diagnosis so they didn't drive me here for nothing?

Yeah, that wasn't going to work. He had to bite the bullet. "I'm not sick." He slowly removed himself from your grasp. "I just can't see."

A concerned look graced your features. "What? Is everything okay?"

"Yes, I just--"

"You just what Reid? You can talk to me. Your energy is super wonky right now. I'm getting a little worried for you."

This was stupid. He was acting stupid. He shouldn't be embarrassed by this. You were just looking out for him, that was all, it was all probably surface level anyway. It was all--

"Spencer, what's wrong?"

His breath stifled to a halt.

"What did you just say?"

Your concerned look deepened.

"I asked what was wrong."

You had never called him by his first name before.

He shook his head. "No, before that." His eyes met yours. "You've never said my first name before."

A flash of...regret? nerves? shot through your eyes. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to overstep any boundaries. I should've asked--"

"Say it again." He properly sat down. "My name I mean, say it again. Please."

"You're not mad?" You were tentative with your words now, adding his name after a beat. "...Spencer?"

His name formed like the first rain shower after a draught on your lips, falling with the grace of the autumn leaves from your tongue.

"You've never called me that before." His expression was shy, and man he wished he could see more than your blurry figure right now. "I, uh, thought I could go without my glasses tonight, but I also don't have my contacts."

"Would you like me to call you that more?" You were going to make him go into freaking cardiac arrest. He nodded fervently. Your shoulders slightly lost some of their tension. "Why would you do that to yourself? You wouldn't be able to see."

"Statistically those who wea--"

"Spencer."

Oh, he was turning to putty now. You were going to kill him, and he didn't mind.

"I thought I would look better without them."

A scoff emitted from you. "If you need them to see, you need them to see. Don't change your appearance for the approval or interest of someone else." He felt the red rush up his neck, around his ears. "Plus," You added with a quieter tone. "I think you look plenty good with them on." You locked eyes. "Gorgeous, even. There's a reason Morgan calls you pretty boy, you know."

Gorgeous? You just called him gorgeous. No one had called him that before.

"Really?"

"Really, Spencer."

Yeah, he was done for.

taglist:

@alllriseabove @kitty-kei @donttrustlove @jiuseoks

[padfootagain]

Only an Almost (XV)

Chapter 15: Aftermath

Hi! Here comes a new chapter!

We’re still dealing with a lot of angst! Sorry (not sorry)!

I hope you’ll like this chapter! Please, tell me what you think!

*************************************

Pairing: Hozier x fem!reader, friends with benefits AU

Warning: No explicit smut or nsfw content, but there are sexual themes and heavy make-out sessions (it’s a friends with benefits AU, I can’t really escape it), so 18+ only!

Summary: Andrew has been in love with you for years, and yet he has never confessed his feelings. But a night out celebrating the engagement of his best friend changes everything. However, you don't seem ready to be with him just yet. You make him an offer that he can't refuse... but will certainly regret.

Word Count : 2387

Masterlist for the series – Hozier’s Masterlist – Main Masterlist

You had called a dozen times, and Andrew had refused to answer.

After a night spent at his parents’, he felt better, although he was still devastated. He reckoned he would need a long time to get over this. Over you…

His brother stopped by the next day, just to check on him, but Andrew put on a brave face and played it off. Jon was everything but fooled. He stayed for dinner and well into the night. Sam was the one dispatched the next day to keep an eye on Andrew, who was beginning to be seriously annoyed at this game of babysitting.

Sam had been trying to get a conversation going for the last twenty minutes, but Andrew wasn’t in the mood to socialize and make an effort to fight his introverted tendencies.

Besides, there was a question on the tip of his tongue he was afraid to ask. He didn’t want to be angry at his best friend…

“Have you heard about the next rugby match? They say we’re up for a proper challenge against the French!”

“Hmmm…”

Sam finally heaved an annoyed sigh, but his voice was still gentle when he spoke.

“Come on, Andy! Say something! You haven’t spoken more than three words since I’ve arrived.”

“I’ve never asked you to come in the first place.”

“I’m just trying to be supportive. And a good friend. So… talk to me. Cry on my shoulder, I don’t know…”

A heavy silence followed, while Sam stared at his friend, sitting on his comfortable couch, the crackling of a fire in the hearth and the distant chanting of birds the only sounds to disturb the silence. Andrew was staring at the pine trees on the other side of the window, how their branches swayed in the wind.

“Did you know?”

Andrew’s question came out of the blue, making Sam frown. He was still staring at nothing as his deep voice cut the air like a knife. Calm, cold, deadly so…

“When you called me the other night to tell me to speak with Y/N… did you know that she wanted to dump me to date someone else?” he went on.

Sam didn’t answer, it was only then that Andrew turned his gaze to him again.

“You knew,” he let out in a bitter chuckle.

“I didn’t,” Sam defended himself. “I didn’t, I just… She told Daphne that someone had asked her out, but we didn’t know if she had accepted to go or not. I just… we just wanted you to have a chance to tell her how you felt before she would take a decision.”

“A little late for that.”

“Oh, come on! Don’t put the blame on me, that’s unfair! You’ve known Y/N for years, you’ve been head over heels for her for so fucking long, and you’ve been sleeping with her for months! You had plenty of time to tell her…”

“And I shouldn’t have!” Andrew answered with anger shaking his voice, turning it into a booming sound that echoed through the living room. “I shouldn’t have kissed her that night, and I shouldn’t have slept with her, and I should have kept my bloody mouth shut!”

“Of course not, you were right to finally act on your feelings!”

“Was I? Look where it got me!”

He heaved a frustrated sigh, almost a groan. Damn, he wanted to tear his own lungs apart…

“Talking to her was never the problem, Sam. She doesn’t love me. My feelings aren’t reciprocated. That’s the problem.”

“She’s making a mistake…”

“Didn’t you hear me? She doesn’t feel anything for me. She doesn’t want to be with me. She only wanted a fling, I was around, and she got one. End of story.”

Sam shook his head, but didn’t know what to add.

“I’m sorry, Andy. It makes no fucking sense to me. I was certain she felt the same… it was obvious.”

“She doesn’t want to be with me. She doesn’t want to wait around while I’m gone touring. I’m not good enough…”

“Now, stop it! You’re just wallowing in self-pity and indulging in some self-deprecating bullshit! You are good enough.”

“If I were, she wouldn’t be dating someone else,” Andrew spat back, and Sam wasn’t sure how he could counter that remark.

“You should have told me the truth,” Andrew went on after a short silence. “You should have told me there was someone else.”

“We didn’t even know she had accepted that date!”

“You should have told me. I went there hoping we could be together… that we could change it all to a proper relationship. And the next second, I’m out of the goddamn picture. It’s like… like my whole world crumbled down. You… you should have told me.”

Andrew blinked tears away, averting his eyes to hide his reaction. But his voice sounded more like a croak than a composed tone. Sam nodded.

“I’m sorry. I should have told you. I just… I’m sorry. Do you want to tell me how it went?”

“I went there. I wanted to talk, but instead we had sex. And the pillow talk that I thought was going to turn into an invitation for a proper date ended up in me running away so she wouldn’t see me cry.”

“Damn, Andy… that’s brutal.”

“Yeah…”

“I don’t understand why she acted like this. It doesn’t sound like her, it’s…”

“Cruel. Disgusting. Unfair.”

“Yeah… kind of…”

“I don’t know. I don’t understand anything. I haven’t understood a thing since we’ve started this.”

“Maybe she’s scared…”

“Stop. Stop trying to see something where there’s nothing at all. She wanted sex, and I was around. And I was foolish enough to think she cared. That’s all.”

Sam heaved a sigh, but nodded anyway.

“Have you talked to her since that night?”

“No.”

“Has she reached out?”

“Many times. I’m hesitating to block her number.”

“You should talk things out, though.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“You ran away, you said it yourself. Perhaps… perhaps if you talked, you could understand why she did this to you. Not why she doesn’t feel the same, but… why she acted like that. Why she hurt you like that.”

Andrew weighed his friend’s words. They sounded wise, but promised a lot of pain too.

“I’m not sure I want to know.”

Sam nodded again.

“Can I do anything to make you feel less terrible?”

“Not really, no. I just… I just need to process everything that happened.”

Sam rested a comforting hand on Andrew’s shoulder, but he didn’t react.

“You’re a good man, Andy. I know… I know it’s hard. But… don’t let this make you feel bad about yourself, okay? It’s not your fault. And you’re a good man.”

Andrew’s gaze followed the branches swaying back and forth with the wind.

Not good enough for her to love me…

Two weeks passed, and it was time to buy the suits for the wedding. Andrew was doing his best to smile and look the part of the perfect best man, but he was nothing but numb with pain.

You shouldn’t be there, Sam had promised that; even though the same shop was taking care of the dresses and the suits, they had different areas, to make sure that the future bride and groom would not be able to see each other. Anyway, Daphne’s appointment had begun almost two hours ago, Andrew expected that she and her bridesmaids – including you – were long gone by now.

It was a fancy place, all wooden walls and shelves of silk and wool. The style of an old, traditional tailor. The carpet was a deep shade of green and blue, leathered seats around a large room with a set of mirrors and a long wooden table at the centre. It could have been a set for some old spy movie.

If all his friends knew that something was off with him, Andrew was grateful that they didn’t insist when he answered that he didn’t want to talk about it. Sam was the only one who knew about you and him, and Andrew was set on keeping it this way.

Sam was nervous as he tried on different suits. Andrew couldn’t hide that he was entertained by it, while a tailor was taking his measurements as well. They had all agreed on some colours and models, and Andrew had answered with a polite smile to the usual joke about his height.

It was an emotional moment when Sam stood in front of a mirror, wearing the suit he would wear for his wedding. A few adjustments were necessary, there were tiny colourful pins here and there, but it was the suit. Andrew patted his shoulder with a fond smile on his lips.

“Congratulations, Sam,” he said softly, voice warm and sincere. “I’m so happy for you.”

“Thanks, mate,” his friend answered with tears in his eyes. “God… it’s really happening. I’m really going to marry the love of my life. What a lucky bastard I am, huh?”

They both laughed. Their three other friends who were there were chatting behind them, comparing a set of belts.

“A handsome fellow too,” Andrew complimented.

“Right? Not ugly enough to make Daphne run away?”

“Nah… you look sharp. Besides, she’s smitten with you… for some weird reason.”

“She must be out of her mind.”

“Without a doubt.”

Sam brushed a tear away.

“God, I’m so fucking happy…”

Andrew gave him a warm smile, an honest one, the first earnest smile he had given to anyone since that night.

“I don’t know about that thing, though…” Sam added, pointing at the blue pocket square.

He had chosen a deep shade of burgundy for his suit, while his groomsmen would be wearing brown. Andrew and Sam were to share the same shade for the pocket square though, as Andrew was his best man.

“Green could be nice,” Sam mumbled, trying to picture another colour.

“You want me to go ask for another sample?”

“Could you? That would be grand. Thanks, Andy. We should compare it to your suit too.”

Andrew merely nodded, walking out of the room in search for the tailor. He walked down a corridor, reached the hall and easily spotted the man he was looking for. He was talking with someone…

… and as he walked closer, Andrew recognised you.

Your gazes met before he could turn around and leave, and all he could do was stare with an agape mouth and a shocked expression. You froze as well, and your sudden silence made the tailor turn in Andrew’s direction.

“Can I do something for you, sir?” he asked, and Andrew forced himself to swallow so he could summon back his voice.

“Yeah… erm… sorry to bother you, we wanted to see other colours for the pocket squares, if it’s possible…”

“Of course, sir. I’ll fetch them right now.”

He added a few words to you, but Andrew had stopped listening. What the hell were you doing here? Daphne’s appointment was three hours ago…

You were so fucking beautiful… in a simple pair of blue jeans, an emerald shirt, and the sun coming in through the large shop windows. His heart was going a thousand miles a minute and he hated himself for wanting to kiss you. You had broken his heart, his soul, him… in a million pieces and his first reaction was still an urge to kiss you, and hold you, and never let go…

The tailor was gone without Andrew noticing. You took a couple of steps towards him, and he tried to walk away, but he didn’t have the strength for it.

God, he missed you so fucking much…

“Hi,” you breathed, looking quite stunned to see him there.

“Hi.”

 “How is Sam doing in there?”

“Good. Daphne?”

“Grand.”

“I thought you would be gone by now.”

He saw you clenching your jaw, noticed how this must have sounded… but he didn’t apologise for it.

“Yeah… well… Daphne and her mother are taking forever,” you joked. “And you can’t just ask a future bride to hurry, so…”

“Yeah…”

He cleared his throat, tried to look away. If he looked away, perhaps he could remember what you had done to him, and then he could go back to wanting to never see you again…

“Look, I… I know that now is obviously not the right time but… do you think that we could talk? Like… properly. You… you kind of stormed out last time, and I’m not blaming you for it,” you added in a hurry, as if to hold him back. “I… I understand. But we should talk about this. Could we do that?’

“I really don’t know what we could discuss,” Andrew shrugged, his voice growing harsher even if it was still low. “You’ve met someone else, there’s nothing to add.”

“You haven’t answered a single phone call since that night.”

He let out a long exhale through his nose, clenched his jaw. Still, his voice was soft when he answered.

“I… I don’t think we should see each other for a while, Y/N.”

“But I…”

“Please, just…”

“We should talk about this! Before taking any decision, we should talk about this! Andy… please…”

There were tears in your eyes and he was so angry by the sight. He was the one with a broken heart in this, with the unrequited feelings and the shattered self-esteem. Not you. Why the fuck were you crying when he was the one who felt betrayed and used?

“Look… Just one time. Let us talk about this, just once. And then, you can never see me again if you want.”

Andrew averted his eyes, buried his hands in the pockets of his trousers. But he nodded still.

“Alright.”

“Are you free tomorrow night?”

He nodded again.

“Alright, then… come to my place tomorrow, okay? We can talk this through.”

He nodded, unable to look up at you again, he knew he would start crying if he did.

And then the tailor was back, talking about the colours of pocket squares, and Andrew followed him in silence back to Sam, and the happiness of a friend Andrew was determined not to taint with his own sorrow. He was smiling when he looked at the green fabrics the tailor had to offer.

[cursedlovesstuff]

Fixing Us. Part 4.

In the car, Nat’s mind raced with doubts and fears as she navigated through the city traffic.

Wanda sat beside her, scrolling through her phone, looking for recipes, but it was hard to ignore the storm of thoughts swirling inside Nat’s head.

“Stop overthinking, Nat,” Wanda said suddenly, breaking the silence.

Nat glanced over, startled. “What are you talking about?”

“Your thoughts are loud,” Wanda replied, not looking up from her phone. “You’re overthinking everything that could go wrong.”

“Because a lot could go wrong, Wanda. This is Y/N we’re talking about,” Nat said, gripping the steering wheel tightly.

“I know, which is why you shouldn’t overthink. It’s not helping,” Wanda replied gently.

“I can’t stop overthinking. What if she’s falling out of love with me? What if there’s someone else? What if she doesn’t trust me anymore?” Nat’s voice grew more anxious with each question.

“If she was falling out of love, she wouldn’t give you a chance to fix things. You’re Y/N’s blind spot; she still loves you and she’s still in love with you. If she wasn’t, she would have left by now,” Wanda said firmly.

“Maybe you’ll realize that when you stop pushing her away.”

“I don’t push Y/N away,” Nat retorted defensively.

“You push everyone away, Nat,” Wanda countered, finally putting her phone down. “When you get stressed out and when work gets tough, you shut down emotionally. You try to pretend everything is fine when you’re struggling. You lose focus and forget important things, and Y/N puts up with it.”

Nat remained silent, her knuckles white as she gripped the steering wheel.

Wanda continued, “She tries to get you to sleep, to eat, to train. She tries to keep you on schedule so you don’t fall apart. After so many years, I couldn’t tell you why she still tries to keep you from spiraling.”

Nat sighed deeply, feeling a pang of guilt. “I know I’ve been difficult. I know I’ve taken her for granted.”

“You need to show her that you appreciate her, that you’re willing to put in the effort to make things right,” Wanda said softly. “The reason why I’m helping you is not just for the sake of your relationship, but for the sake of Y/N. She deserves happiness just as much as any of us she has also had a rough life, especially after everything she has done for you.”

“Everything she has done for me?” Nat repeated, sensing there was more to that statement than Wanda was letting on.

Wanda’s eyes flickered with something unspoken, but she didn’t elaborate. “Look, we’re here,” she said instead, nodding towards the parking lot of the shopping center.

Nat pulled into a parking space, turned off the engine, and sat there for a moment, collecting her thoughts. “Thank you, Wanda,” she said quietly. “I don’t know what I’d do without your support.”

Wanda smiled warmly. “That’s what friends are for. Now, let’s get this dinner sorted out. We’ve got a lot of work to do.”

They walked into the grocery store, grabbing a cart. Nat glanced at the shopping list Wanda had compiled. “So, shrimp alfredo and garlic toast?”

“Yep, and we’ll need fresh ingredients to make it special. Let’s start with the seafood section,” Wanda suggested.

As they moved through the aisles, Wanda continued to offer advice. “Remember, it’s not just about the dinner. It’s about showing Y/N that you’re willing to put in the effort, that you’re thinking about her and what she likes.”

“I know,” Nat said, picking out a bag of fresh shrimp. “I just hope it’s not too late.”

“It’s never too late if you’re willing to make a change,” Wanda reassured her, placing a loaf of fresh bread in the cart.

As they moved to the produce section, Wanda picked up a bag of flour. Nat furrowed her brow in confusion. “Why do we need flour? Aren’t we just buying pasta?”

Wanda shook her head with a smile. “We’re making the pasta from scratch. It tastes better, and only the best for Y/N.”

Nat was impressed but also slightly overwhelmed. “Are you sure I can pull this off?”

“With my help, absolutely,” Wanda said confidently. “Let’s grab some fresh garlic and parsley too.”

They continued shopping, selecting the best ingredients. As Wanda picked up fresh tomatoes and heavy cream, Nat asked, “What are those for?”

“Homemade alfredo sauce. Trust me, it’s worth the effort,” Wanda explained, placing the items in the cart.

They made their way through the store, filling the cart with fresh basil, Parmesan cheese, and a bottle of white wine for the sauce. Nat’s mind was slightly more at ease as they checked off items from the list.

Once they had everything for the dinner, Nat wandered off to another section of the store, intent on picking up some of Y/N’s favorite things. She grabbed Oreos, her favorite chips, and some wine she knew Y/N loved among with other things.

As they checked out, Wanda looked at Nat curiously. “You really went all out with the extras.”

Nat smiled slightly. “I want to show her I’m thinking about her, not just with dinner, but in all the little things she loves.”

Wanda nodded approvingly. “That’s the right approach.”

After checking out, Wanda and Nat headed to the car to put up the groceries. Once they got into the car, Wanda gave her a reassuring smile. “Ready?”

Nat nodded, a mix of nerves and determination in her eyes. “Ready.”

As they drove back to Nat’s apartment, the weight of the evening ahead felt heavy but hopeful. Nat was prepared to do whatever it took to make things right, one step at a time.

Back at the apartment, Nat and Wanda unpacked the groceries. Nat carefully placed the fresh ingredients on the counter, feeling a mix of anticipation and anxiety. Wanda began to organize everything, setting out the flour, eggs, and olive oil for the pasta dough.

“Okay, first thing’s first,” Wanda said, tying an apron around her waist. “We’re going to make the pasta dough. It’s a bit messy, but it’s worth it.”

Nat nodded, following Wanda’s lead.

“Alright, Nat. Here’s how we make the pasta dough. First, make a hole in the center of the flour,” Wanda instructed, demonstrating with a mound of flour on the counter. “Then, we crack the eggs into it.”

Nat watched closely and imitated Wanda’s actions, cracking eggs into the flour. “Like this?”

“Perfect,” Wanda said with a nod. “Now, you gently beat the eggs with a fork, slowly incorporating the flour from the edges.”

Nat concentrated, her tongue peeking out slightly as she carefully mixed the eggs and flour. “This is harder than it looks.”

Wanda chuckled. “It takes practice, but you’re doing great. Keep going until it forms a dough.”

As the mixture began to come together, Nat used her hands to knead it into a smooth ball. Wanda added a bit of olive oil, showing Nat how to work it into the dough. “Now we knead. Press it with the heel of your hand, fold it over, and repeat.”

Nat followed Wanda’s movements, finding a rhythm in the repetitive motions. “How long do we knead it?”

“About ten minutes, until it’s smooth and elastic,” Wanda replied. “You’re doing really well, Nat.”

After the dough was ready, they wrapped it in plastic wrap and set it aside to rest. Next, Wanda guided Nat through preparing the shrimp. “First, we need to devein and clean these,” Wanda explained, showing Nat how to remove the shells and veins from the shrimp.

Nat mimicked her, quickly getting the hang of it. “This isn’t so bad.”

“See? You’ve got this,” Wanda encouraged. “Now, let’s season them with some salt, pepper.”

With the shrimp prepped, they moved on to the sauce. Wanda handed Nat a small knife and a clove of garlic.

Nat carefully chopped the garlic, as wanda prepared the pan with olive oil, waiting for Nat to finish. “Great job, Nat.”

After wanda put the garlic into the pan it wasn't long before the aroma of garlic filled the kitchen as it cooked.

Wanda added heavy cream and white wine to the pan, stirring gently. “We’re making the sauce now. Let it simmer and thicken.”

While the sauce simmered, Wanda brought out the pasta dough. “Time to roll out the pasta,” she said, grabbing a rolling pin. “Dust the counter with flour and roll the dough out thinly.”

Nat rolled out the dough, amazed at how it transformed. “This is actually fun.”

Wanda laughed. “Cooking can be therapeutic. Now, we’ll cut the dough into thin strips for the fettuccine.”

They used a sharp knife to cut the pasta into even strips, laying them out to dry slightly. Wanda checked the sauce, adding grated Parmesan cheese and fresh basil. “The sauce is almost ready. Just needs a bit more time.”

Once everything was prepped, Wanda and Nat cooked the pasta in boiling water, watching as it floated to the top. They drained it and added it to the creamy Alfredo sauce, tossing in the cooked shrimp.

After they put everything together in the pot, Wanda’s phone rang, pulling her attention away from their cooking. She glanced at the screen and her face grew serious. “Clint? What’s up?”

Natasha watched Wanda’s expression intently. After a brief conversation, Wanda nodded and ended the call. “Alright, I’ll be there soon.”

Wanda said washing her hands she turns her attention to nat "I have to go someone is trying to rob a bank across town"

"Do you need my help?"

"I think I can handel it but what I do need you to do is fix things with y/n".

“What am I gonna do without your help?” Nat asked, her worry evident.

“Relax, Nat,” Wanda said, giving her a reassuring smile. “Just let the food cook on low for the next 20 minutes.” She hurried to pull on her jacket. “Uh, I’ll send you the recipe for the garlic bread. It’s simple. Call Y/N and see what time she’ll be home.”

Natasha nodded, trying to absorb Wanda’s calmness. “Okay. I’ll handle it.”

Wanda squeezed Nat’s shoulder reassuringly before rushing out. Alone in the kitchen, Nat took a deep breath and began preheating the oven. She gave herself a pep talk, muttering, “You’ve got this. Finish dinner, make her happy, apologize, and talk. Be honest and open. Don’t push her away.” She grabbed her phone and dialed Y/N’s number.

The phone rang for about a minute until Y/N picked up. “Hello?”

“Hey, are you at work right now?” Nat asked, her heart pounding.

There was silence for about ten seconds before Y/N responded. “I’m just getting off and heading to the store. We ran out of eggs and flour, and I need to get something to cook for dinner.”

Nat smiled slightly. “I already went to the store and bought groceries for the week.”

“You did?” Y/N sounded surprised.

“Yes. When will you be home?”

“I guess I can be home in less than 15 minutes.”

“Great. I’ll see you in 15 minutes,” Nat says.

“Oh...okay,” Y/N replied, still sounding puzzled.

After hanging up, Nat started setting up the bed neatly, placing Y/N’s basket of treats and goodies with care. She then returned downstairs, set the oven to preheat, and nervously began preparing the ingredients for the garlic bread.

She heard the door open and close, followed by Y/N’s worried voice. “Nat?” ~

[vixenveil]

✨ Quick "Celeb Crush" Pick A Card Tarot Reading

What would your celeb crush think if they met you? Note: I am focused more on influencers than the ultra-famous, but I suppose it could apply as well. Minors Do Not Interact, since there are adult themes mentioned.

Disclaimer: Do not act on this information as it is for entertainment purposes only. Seriously. Don't harass or stalk anyone (especially those who have created firm boundaries with you). Don't do crimes. I'm not a professional.

Also, energy changes with your ideas, thoughts, beliefs and effort. Also, don't be a crazy psycho stalker or go out of your way to meet this person just because of this reading. Okay?

Let's start!! I used the Star Spinner Tarot for this reading.

Just imagine your crush and choose the image you're gravitated to the most.

1: 🔥✨ ace of wands: Sexy. They find you attractive. Alternatively, they see that you have a lot of creative ambition and would love to work with you. They see a business opportunity with you! AWESOME.

2: 🤔🎆the tower: Erection. They would have one for you. Alternatively, this could be an event where something shocking or devastating happens and you both experience it. You could bump into them and one of you gets injured or they might see you get injured from afar. They could also be seeking reprieve of some sort, but a fan or some fans found them / spotted them out doing something. Maybe even something they will get mocked for doing if it makes it to the media or certain social groups.

3: 😂😔10 of wands, ace of swords: They are fucking too tired to exist right now. You either say or do something that enlightens them. They think this is a learning opportunity for them. Example: they are too busy or overwhelmed to greet you so they remind themselves to not disappoint their fans again by getting burnt out or overworked.

4:🦋🎇 5 of wands rx: They feel like you're not competing for them or with them. They admire you respecting differences and being "good" or "polite." Basically. Like how adults tell the quiet well-mannered kid "you're such a good girl/boy/kid" and so on. They will view you like that. "The ideal fan."

5: 🎆💗ace of cups: They will love you right away. This is adoration from someone who really is connecting with you. You will actually have the opportunity to form a relationship on an emotional level with them. You touch their heart out of everyone else.

6: 😆🌈10 of cups: They think you have a happy life or family. They feel good in your presence though, like you are just like family to them. Soul-family vibes. They would think you were friendly and try to make friends with you. They would think you're cool.

7: 🤷😈6 of coins sideways: They aren't sure if you're bread-crumbing them or not. They are toying with the idea of playing with you. They like to be a player and are thinking of playing you or like ... playing mind games with you. If not romantic, they are thinking you aren't giving them much to go off of or they aren't sure how to respond to you. You aren't doing anything wrong or weird, by the way. They just aren't too sure if they think you are generous with your words / praise or stingy. It's okay though. They can't tell if someone wants something from them most of the time, but if you asked they would probably feel obligated to give it to you. Like a selfie or autograph? I feel like now isn't the best time to meet them, but maybe later on.

8: 😔😶 the hermit: They think you are a loner or don't want to be bothered. You might be looking for something, someone or some place and they see you trying to find it / them / your way there. Your Celeb Crush may also just try to sneak off and be alone right now. They don't seem very social. They want to hide away and not be bothered.

9: 👀😃 knight of swords; They probably think " damn, she was fast" like you approached them quickly and were like "hiIfuckinloveyou" out of nowhere. They probably think your a stan or fan girl. They would smile and take it, sign your autograph and be off. I know that probably sounded off-putting, but that's not how you should take it. I'm seeing you be like excited to meet them and they have a teeny smile, but they're exhausted from work or not sleeping well. or fuckin' all 'em bitches late at night. idk. :)

(c) vixenveil 2024, all rights reserved. (whatever that means?)

don't steal plz and ty.

[bluegekk0]

do you have any tips on trying to draw in the Hades style? I'd like to try it wìth my own OCs but it's very different from my usual style

I definitely won't claim to be an expert, if you study my Vyrm drawing and put it next to the art from the game, you'd definitely notice a lot of differences, especially in the lineart (which I might end up adjusting to be closer to the original style)

But generally, it depends which of the Hades games you want to mimic for your drawing. The artstyle does vary quite a bit between the two games. I'll use the Poseidon and Zeus portraits as examples (left is Hades, right is Hades II):

Some things I noticed when looking at them side by side:

The most obvious part is the shading, the pure black cel shading is a lot more prominent. It's still present on the Hades II art but it's reserved more for the darkest areas, such as under Poseidon's beard. There are still some drawings where the cel shading is more present, such as in the Hades II Demeter art.

Something present in both styles but especially in the first one, and what is in my opinion the crucial part of the Hades-esque look: the speckles of very vibrant colors. If you zoom in, you'll notice that there are small dots and brush strokes of neon green and yellow on both of these Hades I portraits. If you look at the artwork of Zagreus, for example, you'll find a whole rainbow of colors.

There's purple, yellow, mint green and orange. This helps the drawing appear more colorful even if a lot of the colors are fairly muted. In the second game, I noticed these neon highlights are a bit less common, but there are noticeable rim lights which are somewhat vibrant in color.

Something else I noticed comparing the two artstyles is that gradients are more present in the first one, while the second game relies more on brush strokes with gradual changes in color, such as on the "hair" of this Scylla portrait. Any gradients seem to be mostly used for light effects, such as armor shine. You can see the vibrant rim lights here as well.

These are just some things I noticed, there's obviously a lot more to the artstyle. So what I recommend is downloading all those portraits and studying them up close before drawing. Drawing in a completely different artstyle can be quite difficult, but I found it to be a nice experiment. For my drawings I leaned more into the Hades II artstyle, which to me appears softer in comparison to the first one, but the nature of my designs means that they don't fit in as well. Though it's still fun to play around with the artstyle and maybe even learn some things to adapt to your regular style.

I hope this helped at least a little bit. Good luck with your efforts!

[worldsewage]

How does Fuzzification and, Salmonification? work in homerun? Specficially if theres any mental changes!

Ramblings under the cut! :

To preface, I’m gonna start off with some Inkling biology: Inklings are designed to transform and explode (splat) and be tricky and swift via means of completely deconstructing their bodies into a bunch of memory holding parts that are capable of reattaching themselves and forming DIFFERENT parts depending on the command given… this is the act of transforming between kid and swim form, and it’s possible to linger on phases between transforming. This makes inklings extremely powerful and vulnerable in the same stroke. Sort of a glass canon species, no muscles, no true bones, just ink that shifts and exists in gooey messes, or in mini pressurized blasts that mimic muscle when needed or condense into super compressed pressurized parts that stand in for “bone”, the only true separate organ that exists outside of the ink blueprint that mimics organs is the membrane outside the skin, and this is only because it is made of a different series of material than organs and ink (which all contains the same cells, the one that allow them to splat / transform / etc). This “membrane” is a super thin organ that holds all of the “ink” when they get splatted, though it doesn’t physically “hold” the cells, in simpler terms it sort of acts as a thin bag that carries the blueprint cells, it is the structure that allows the cells to fill in details…

The membrane functions like … imagine a plastic glove, the glove is the membrane, next to the glove is a puddle of ink, the ink is the organ/transforming cells. The glove has the ability to pull the water inside of it, and the water is always attached to the glove, even if not inside it, and the glove can pull and release the water at will. When filled, the shape of the glove makes it so the water inside the glove will always, even when stretched or pulled, form a hand. If the glove is torn, the shape distorts, or doesn’t fill properly, depending on the tear. The membrane is able to release ink by seperating very very slightly, enough for ink to burst out of the gaps. (I imagine inklings feel like water balloons filled to the brim… like on the brink of popping? Squishy, yet “dense.”)

Sanitization was a means of replacing the membrane with thick scale like skin. (Btw, this was because in the more detailed sanitization designs I made in the past, I made the skin resemble the scale like patterns used in skin grafts on humans. A thing Inklings wouldn’t ever necessarily need.) Tartar’s quest to make this species who he has deemed worthless feel “even an ounce of humanity” , as a torturous poetic revenge, make them “human.” It forces the membrane to thicken into skin, they can no longer splat or transform. Organs still float in ink globs a tad uselessly inside of them, “useless” organs (as in extra hearts) are surgically removed. There are many complications with sanitization, as it is project made by a damaged rouge ai which was— during the development of santization— unable to speak or communicate eloquently, trying to convey the mess of the emotions it feels via commands and actions. And unfortunately, in this case, it’s squid body horror, it’s physically rejecting taking part in this project, and instead is turning squids into something else entirely.

Cycloid Serum works similarly, but rather it burns off the membrane and heals over it with scales, cycloid serum was the science that was attempted to be created when sanitization was developed. Cycloid serum is more effective on Inklings, since Octolings already have a denser skin. The commander could have probably had printed out a more thorough and in depth explanation of the science used in sanitization… But, oh well. “a tragic error occurred in the device used to develop it, leading to the project’s abandonment.”

Cycloid Serum was made using Salmonid Skin parts as an effort to reduce the deaths caused by rising tides for Inklings. It was mostly used on rouge outskirt inklings who are separate from Inkopolis Inklings. It seems most Inkling’s who agreed to the testing were already seeking out greatness, the test subjects all seemed to be talented and well famed— it later proved that this project was to create ink-salmonids that would rule on the front lines, and the reason “popular / famous / talented “ inklings were chosen is because it directly ties into Salmonid’s religious culture regarding home running.

This project was scraped, but the few remaining Salmon-Inklings are very popular for their sleek design— especially among Dome-Salmonids, who have similar beauty standards to New Inkadia Octarians due to growing up AROUND Inklings/Octolings, meaning short muzzles and humanoid appearances are desirable. (Such as Frye, in the Alterna, aka Cat Hell.) Unfortunately, these Subjects still have Running instincts; and can transform.

Fuzzy Ooze was a separate project not related to the creation of the Cycloid serum. The company who funded this project was still the same, though. Fuzzy Ooze is dense and is layered on top of the Inkfish, and slowly melds into the skin, unlike the previous serums, Fuzzy Ooze CAN infect other species, but it seems it works BEST with Octarians, fuzzy inklings tend to not last, and splat and are capable of fully removing the fuzz, but since Octarians contain more MUSCLE and actual flesh compared to the Ink + Membrane species, Fuzzy Ooze works more effectively. I’ll probably make a detailed post regarding the anatomical differences in each species.

Mental Changes: (ie: what the ask was originally about before I went rogue.)

Santization wipes the memory wholly and totally, and the first moments are rough, as they’re completely hollowed out; they need training to re-remember certain actions and behaviors, most Sanitized subjects are nearly catatonic and unresponsive the first week. Usually after that, they slowly remember ‘habits’ they may have had, such as tapping their foot, dominant hand, humming tunes, if is exclusively muscle memory and mostly they are not responsive nor do they recognize the importance of the behavior. Previous traumas or fears no longer trigger reactions.

Cycloid Serum does not wipe the memory, but rather it forces them to inherit Salmonid Instincts; which makes them inherent generational traumas + inclination towards swimming + cravings and changes in diet… ie experiencing desires inklings would NOT desire. (Mostly because Salmonids NEED water, they need to keep their gills moist to survive, Cycloid Serum victims don’t…) Most have a hard time sorting out memories, much like the Mud; but slightly different… mostly due to being aware and alert. They have their memories, but because they are fueled with random instincts, the “importance” or “significance” of events in their mind will warp… leading to what could be perceived as memory loss, they do, mostly, just thier goals are warped. Because they follow Salmonid Instincts, they can homerun.

Those infected by Fuzzy Ooze will have a change in diet + behaviors + and May develop aches or pains that Inklings wouldn’t typically develop as a result of slowly churning their insides into red blood guts. They also don’t experience memory loss, but as a result of a rush of new emotions + instincts, they can come off as if they DON’T know you, because certain memories are labeled as nonsignificant. There are probably certain types of fuzzy folk depending on the DNA used… but ultimately they are NATURALLY non-violent.

Both Fuzzy and Cycloid’d inkfish can transform. Not neatly nor safely. But they can.

[biblioflyer]

Critical Mutant Theory: Fictional Societies are Loose Allegories

This is the third entry in a longer essay about the pessimism of X-Men, why it is a pessimistic setting, and if that is indeed a fair reading at all. This part discusses some of the deeper influences of X-Men, the problems with direct analogies to the real world, and why X-Men is unable to move beyond depicted pogroms.

Part 1 laid out some of the core conceits of the setting.

Part 2 discusses theories of historical change.

However fitting events throughout history and the world might be for interpreting X-Men, it is by intent a culturally American setting with a majority culturally American writers and artists, the classic example being the assertion that over time Xavier has come to represent the thinking of Martin Luther King Jr. while Magneto represents Malcom X. 

Again, like everything else X-Men these are clumsy metaphors that cannot represent the complexities of either man or the movements they were influential within. These are metaphors that are exaggerated for effect by design and metaphors that have had decades across multiple mediums to evolve beyond their original conceits. The notion that this was the original conception of the characters also appears to be folklore, the associations with King and X came later which makes trying to apply real world historical movements, ideas, and events to the world of the X-Men that much less likely to be anything more than vaguely accurate, although occasionally by accident or intent it is spookily relevant.

Suffice to say I am also intimately familiar with the discourse around how political opportunists have flattened the lives and beliefs of King in particular in order to moralize about Black American failings and justify various disenfranchisements as a consequence of not living up to a mythology that is convenient for the comfortable and powerful. I’m also aware of how the mythologized King has been used to try to discredit other civil rights movements for being too disruptive, too ambitious, or too untidy. Something I think X-Men ‘97 does quite well is show us that the X-Men are often exhausted, demoralized, and even sometimes lash out in frustration and anger, but reliably recommit to acting upon their virtues.

The complexity of trying to use X-Men as a direct allegory is why the surface level nihilism of X-Men is worth unpacking. I’m fond of saying that we need to not forget that fictional societies are storytelling devices, not remote civilizations that have consistent internal rules that can be examined and codified by anthropologists. As storytelling devices, they can reflect our world in a funhouse mirror sort of way. 

Mutants are explicitly an invitation for people who have experienced aggression and unfreedom due to an arbitrary characteristic to feel represented, at least metaphorically.

More specifically, the X-Men setting is a storytelling device to talk about incredibly emotionally difficult concepts with some degree of emotional distance like bigotry, identity based violence, reform efforts, bitterness, systemic oppression, resistance, and the risks and rewards of rebellion or assimilation. If the victims in the setting make lasting gains that aren’t reversed, then the setting is either finished as a device for telling stories about bigotry or it needs to become more sophisticated. 

Lynchings and massacres are visceral events that the audience can easily grasp what is happening, why, and it gets the blood pumping. Something more rooted in the present might be someone being shot by the police because the police panicked and thought they were about to get shot with projectile spines or laser vision. A mutant being refused a home loan because they’re purple or being asked to file down their horns for their office job to avoid making the humans uncomfortable is very relevant but not particularly cinematic.

Because of the difficulty of trying to preserve familiar themes in a recognizable way while allowing the characters to achieve meaningful victories, the temptation is always very strong in any setting to reverse victories and prefer stasis or even make things significantly worse. There are opportunities for letting the heroes actually win and start a new “phase” of the story where the heroes are dealing with the consequences of winning as well as the ever present threat of revanchism. X-Men ‘97 even leaves the door open to this in small ways. Which will be the theme for the next installment.

[rarsneezes]

i made a separate account to save the url but don’t feel like goign thru the hassle of actually swapping the urls between my main and this account

so if you’re looking for rar, who is “rarsneezes” on all sites exept for tumblr, hi! you found them!

my actual blog is at rarmaster.tumblr.com, lmao

[utilitycaster]

I do agree with the post going around about how you cannot, actually, run everything in 5e and hacking 5e is a recipe for GM burnout. What frustrates me is that it's true that there's a dropoff in viewer/listenership for Actual Play using non-D&D 5e systems...but in my admittedly limited experience it's often the most dedicated D&D players who are willing to check out an Actual Play in something different. When I look in the CR fandom at who watches Candela Obscura or the Daggerheart episodes or various one-shots? When I look at who praises TAZ Amnesty and Steeplechase? When I look at who recommends Mentopolis and Misfits & Magic? Mostly, they're people who also are huge 5e fans. I've said it before but, nine times out of ten, if you find someone who complains at how 5e-centric actual play is you will not find a single post about a popular actual play channel's non-5e work (while finding plenty about their 5e series) and usually you won't find many posts about actual plays that never do 5e either.

[gethoce]

Adult Kirby(s)

[roetrolls]

Spent all day figuring out what I want my new Harlan sprites to look like. Got one pose down, plus an alternate for it :D

HOPEFULLY NOW THAT I KNOW WHAT I'M AIMING FOR IT'LL GO FASTER FOR THE [checks file] SEVEN REMAINING POSES! I'm also making sure to have a better workflow this time so I can more easily go in and draw new expressions later

[oatbugs]

everyone will always be haunted by what they are and i believe it is far more beneficial to embrace the haunting (as long as it isn't derailing your life or others') than to strive to be a truly "balanced" person. the idea of someone who is truly equalised to the point of utter harmony is an essentially unachievable thing imo

[beevean]

I love when the Writing is so Peak that it pretty much gaslights you <3

anyway N!Lisa may be a classist dick but not even she deserves to be married to a man she sees as a devil. what's with this show and trying to paint obviously unhealthy abusive relationships as the cutest thing just because there's some mild banter between them