#and then cover my mouth

[if-a-moth-flew-into-a-candle]

. . . uhmmmmm tk story in the tags?? GSMSVSKSBSMBDD

[calvinandhobbes]

ik we all want to be covered in blood but which way sounds the best: splattered across your face, dripping out of your mouth or poured over you carrie-style?

[diamondnokouzai]

if magneto knew what the internet was then he would post to r/aita as often as possible and all his posts would be the top posts of the year. thats the kind of drama hes going through. he also gets permabanned from r/mutants for advocating violence

[femmetality]

what do u mean i cant wrap her voice around me like a weighted blanket. r u sure? can i at least try

[koroart]

Sleepy Lions 🦁✨

[yuri-is-online]

The Quiet Part (Azul, Jade, and Trey x Yuu)

"Oh can I help you? You seem to be lost." You attempt to cheerfully ask the vaguely familiar looking person in front of you. As if he is deliberately trying to rub salt in your wounds, Crowley ignored your request to leave campus for NRC parents day and is instead making you and Grim run errands. The person in front of you, blissfully ignorant to your inner turmoil perks up at your attention.

"Forgive me for asking, but are you the magicless prefect?" You and Grim exchange a confused glance. "You've got to be right?" They're practically glowing with how happy they are to see you. " Oh I'm sorry, I've just heard so much about you!" Wait, what?

notes: they/them pronouns used for Yuu, in-law fishing (Azul and Jade) vs sibling smack down (Trey), if you liked this please check my master list here.

Azul

"Well aren't you just darling!" You fold your clipboard just a bit closer to your chest, you don't think this excitable plump lady is intending to intimidate you but she is all up in your personal space. Her pearlescent hair frames her face perfectly, nicely complementing her large black hat that reminds you of a Victorian aristocrat on her way to the opera. She just lacks the fancy cigarette case.

"Hey lady back off my hench human! You're spooking 'em!" Grim pouts with his hands on his hips but only succeeds in changing her attention to him.

"And you must be the dire beast! Simply marvelous I didn't think Zuzu would let me have a chance to see you two at all." She sighs, clearly happy in a vaguely sinister way where her familiar looking smile doesn't reach her eyes. "Oh where are my manners? I'm-"

"Mother!" A very flusterd octopus runs, well more like flails, his way up the main street towards the woman your speaking with, but she doesn't do more than wave before returning to her conversation with you.

"-Mrs. Ashengrotto! Say darling are you free for a bit?" She's back to crowding you once again while Azul moves in between the two of you. "I have been so looking forward to meeting my poopsy's friends."

"Mother please, the prefect is extremely busy. There's no need for them to show you around campus, what sort of son would I be if I-"

"That's besides the point." Mrs. Ashengrotto's smile doesn't fade but the warmth of her voice most certainly does. Still Azul remains firm, extending an arm to keep you from moving towards his mother, or maybe to keep her from closing in on you? "You can't expect me to not be curious! You never have written such glowing things about-"

"That's enough mother." Grim yanks on your pant leg and points towards the path to Sam's shop.

"It is not poopsy you can't just ask for advice and then refuse every opportunity to use it." Mrs. Ashengrotto huffs in disappointment and elegantly shakes her finger as you and Grim begin to slowly inch away.

"I have no idea what it is you are talking about mother," Azul pushes his glasses further up his face, silently pleading with you to run faster "and I am certain the prefect doesn't either so please, allow me to escort you to the Monstro Lounge that you have been so eager to see." His mother pouts, pouts! At him puffing her cheeks up with air before finally looking behind him and realizing you aren't there.

"Oh absolutely not, I am not letting this fish out of my net." She mutters muscling her son out of the way. "Yoo hoo! Darling are you certain you can't at least stay for dinner?"

"Mother!"

"Or maybe forever?"

"MOTHER!"

Jade

"Well now, this is a surprise, watcha doin here Jade?" Grim asks as you step foot into the Pomefiore lounge. Normally asking Jade anything is akin to sticking your foot in your mouth but you have to admit, you are sort of curious why Jade and Vil, the two most composed people on campus, are standing awkwardly in the corner clearly a bit out of place while two men you assume are their father's seem to be having a grand time chatting it up on the couch. Disturbingly, Jade makes eye contact with you with a look you almost think is screaming for help.

"Yoooo!" The Leech father is tall, and the speed with which he snaps up off the couch and approaches you does not help at all with his naturally intimidating aura. "You've gotta be the prefect right? Mr. Leech!" He extends a hand and you look at Jade who just smiles at you as you gingerly take his father's hand and immediately regret it with how he nearly snaps your arm off with his hand shake.

"Um yes that's me, can I help you?" You wince and try to avoid rolling your wrist too much. Mr. Leech looks a bit confused.

"Mhm? Don't you have any folks visiting today?" You look at Jade who reluctantly draws attention to himself with a cough.

"Their situation is a bit unique father." You're thankful Jade doesn't say more than that

"Well why didn't you say that? Now I look like an ass." Mr. Leech claps the back of his head and mutters. "And here I had everything I wanted to say to the in laws planned out already, shit." He turns back to you with a smile and Vil's dad lets out an elegant laugh.

"From a certain point of view that makes your task easier no?" Vil's father says as Jade reluctantly moves out of the corner towards his father, clearly looking for an excuse to get him out of Vil's hair.

"If you are done saying hello to your friend, would you like to see some of the mountain lover's club projects?" Jade asks, already gently herding him towards the door as his father shrugs.

"Sure, you coming kid?" Why is he looking at you and why is Jade giving you that strange look again? "Jade's told his mom all about your hikes, gotta admit I don't really get the appeal myself but it sounds like you two have a grand old time with it."

"The headmage technically has me-" Mr. Leech wraps one arm around your shoulder and another around Jade's and resumes the march towards the door.

"Aww don't worry about that!" It's clear you aren't getting out of this with just how terrified Grim is, he's practically rooted to his spot as Mr. Leech loosens his grip to wave over his shoulder at Vil and his dad. "See ya next Sunday Eric!"

"Good luck! Don't scare them off!"

Trey

Two small children stare up at you with sharp eyes, judgmentally you think but you can't be too sure. "You are the prefect right?" Asks the little boy, definitely judgmentally. "I thought you would be prettier or at least more handsome."

"Hey!" snaps his sister, who doesn't hesitate to hit him in a display that you are sure would give her parents a headache. "Big brother never lies to us about stuff!" Her brother scowls and rubs his head.

"Big brother lies all the time, what else do you call those 'secret ingredients' of his?" He goes back to staring you down and you and Grim exchange a look.

"Yeah but not to us." The little girl crosses her arms and stares her brother down sternly. "He would never lie about something like that. Besides did you see how dopey he looks when he talks about them?" The little boy looks away from you with a pout, almost like you stole his toy or something while his sister rolls her eyes. "It is so obvious- you would absolutely know if you were a girl."

"That's got nothing to do with it! I'm just worried you know, it's important to make sure they pass the sniff test." He looks like he is questioning if he can get away with hitting his sister in front of you as you desperately look around for any sign of these kids' parents. "You would totally know if you were a boy."

"Uhhh hench human," Grim poorly whispers "you don't think these two are..." he doesn't finish his sentence but as you both examine the bickering duo you start to note all the little similarities between them and-

"Hey you two aren't causing problems on purpose are you?" Trey looks down sternly on the two kids who completely ignore his tone and jump on him immediately.

"TREY!"

"Are you gonna show us the hedgehogs?!" squeals the little girl.

"Forget that, I wanna see the Coliseum!" cheers the little boy. You breathe a sigh of relief, and wave to Trey getting ready to continue your patrol when the little girl looks after you confused.

"Aren't you gonna come?" She asks, so sweetly in comparison to the heat you're taking from her brother. Trey smiles at you, but he can't really bring himself to keep eye contact.

"The prefect's busy, I'm sure. They don't need to be running around after us all day." He sets them both down and starts herding them towards the mirror, shooting you a wink over his shoulder as he flicks his little brother on the forehead for sticking his tongue out at you. His sister sighs and you swear you hear her whine that-

"You just want to keep them to yourself. You can't keep me away forever, I swear I'll be a good wing woman, you're waaaay too lame to get a date yourself Trey!" You awkwardly look back down at your clipboard as Grim desperately tries to do the math in his head.

[poppy5991]

Hero Commission: We’ll make Hawks a spy because he’s a good liar.

Meanwhile Hawks:

[wigglesdtuff]

My arms around his neck My fingers laced a crown I was a heavy heart to carry But he never let me down

[bigcatbulges]

Source - li_geduld

[willowparkfanclub]

jenna marbles and julien solomita got married and i am in actual shambles

[silusvesuius]

[domwitch]

The cute muffled yelp that boys make when they're tied up and gagged ❤️❤️❤️ the way they wiggle their ass and arch their back, begging to be touched ❤️❤️❤️ the strangled cry they make when you give them what they want, but at a pace so slow it's torture ❤️❤️❤️

[chrissy-kaos]

Why am i never good enough..

[phantomialie]

no kisses.

I can't be bothered to finish this

[jaggybotexe]

chonny when he’s charming or something idk (RAHHHH I LOVE CHONNY JASH I WISH AUSTRALIANS WERE REAL‼️‼️‼️)

[ohbo-ohno]

Opposites attract, that’s what they always say, right?

Johnny guesses that’s the reason why he has you, sweet, shy you.

You can’t stand the affection he tries to give you outside the comfort of your apartment. “It’s just a little kiss, bonnie!” He’d always whine, and you’d give him the briefest peck on the lips before turning away with a heated face.

It always made you get embarrassed and deny him your nudes, leaving him with the blurry pictures he’s taken in haste while your back was turned to use during deployments, but he ached to have your face in the pictures.

Of course Ghost knew. Johnny can’t keep his mouth shut, being the whiny mutt he is. He had seen the pictures, saw just how much you shy from attention of any kind.

“Bring ‘em over.” It wasn’t an offer, it was an order.

When you were told you’d be meeting Johnny’s Lieutenant, one he can’t stop mentioning, how he’s a good man, you never expected this.

Kneeling at the feet of a man you’ve just met today, stripped bare with a thick collar preventing you from looking down or away from his heated gaze.

Johnny’s still in the room, you can feel it. Ghost had told him to “sit.” a while ago, and he hadn’t moved since. The thought of Johnny seeing you naked in front of a different man made you start to turn away, only to be met with a sharp tug to the leash sitting in Ghost’s hand.

“Eyes here, pup. Johnny’s not gonna help you through this lesson.” Ghost ordered, admittedly much gentler than he’d use with Johnny. He didn’t want to scare you off after your first lesson after all.

The second your eyes flicker up to meet Ghost’s for the briefest moment, his boot shifts to press between your legs, a low rumble of approval echoing through his chest. “That’s it, pup, eyes here.”

—

Also known as Simon fucking the social anxiety away AND gaining a new puppy! I am sorry for leaving something so long- I hope it’s okay!

oh my god i cant fucking breathe. the upside to being awkwardly open about my kinks online is getting fucking GIFTS like this in my inbox occasionally. you will never understand the things this ask makes me feel. oh my god. never apologize again for sending me this.

always thinking about johnny and his fwb. he's so so so excited, but he's also a fucking lot so his new girl isn't super willing to enter something Permanent, y'know? he's just maybe a bit much for her

but he's like. sick over this girl. his every thought is Her, he's literally hard nearly every moment they're together, like he is salivating over this girl. he made her his phone lockscreen and gets hard every time he checks the time now but he refuses to change it because she's just so perfect

and poor simon has to listen to have favorite (don't tell johnny) sergeant talk about this new girl constantly. i mean johnny just does not shut up about this girl. she's the most beautiful woman alive, perfect tits with a fat ass, thick thighs and a waist just so fucking grabbable. kissable - fuckable - lips and a cunt made of fucking gold, johnny just never shuts up

and it doesn't seem fair that the mutt gets to have all the fun, does it? ghost keeps johnny in line, drains him of all that restless energy so he's not feral when he's sent home. seems only fair that he gets to meet the pretty bird he hears johnny jack off to in the barracks and the shower

johnny's more than eager to agree. ghost says smth like "i wanna meet her" one of the dozens of times she's brought up and johnny practically falls all over himself to set up a date and time

and he definitely doesn't tell her. he invites her over to his flat (maybe even simon's, claims he moved), and his his tongue down her throat the moment she steps through the door. she's topless before simon even makes himself known

it's not so hard to convince her to have a threesome, it's far harder to convince her to put on a posture collar and kneel pretty. johnny' a good puppy (for once) and leads by example though, strips himself completely naked and follows ghost's orders better than he ever has (he'll get plenty of treats later, as long as he can keep himself in check)

you think this is just lead up to some kinky sex, ghost and soap see this as the first night of the rest of your life. ghost is fucking strict, and harsh, but he knows the importance of good training with unruly dogs, and if anything johnny's told him is accurate, he already knows you'll be a handful. he's got to be harsh and strict with johnny this first night too, so you can see that he's not going to soften up (even though he probably will)

anyways, there's no way you're leaving this night without ghost painting your ass red. you'll also probably wake up the next morning with your leash tied to the bedpost, right below johnny's. only one of you is going to be happy about this