#and when he finally saw the real dark ruins of her soul... he flinched

[fairyroses]

— SMALLVILLE, "Accelerate" (2.21) & "Wrath" (7.07)

+ bonus:

[a-purple-lizard]

Could you please do a Kabal x F!Reader

Where the reader hates the fact that he’s in the black dragons but she still loves him. So could you please write something of a love and hate relationship

With smut please 🥺

Swift dragon

Kabal x female reader

[This post is NSFW]

I’m am SO sorry this took so long, I had major writers block with this one. Personally, kabal isn’t my cup of tea, I’ve just never got the appeal to him, but I hope I did him justice.

But seriously, if anybody has any Kabal tips, please tell me! I would greatly appreciate it!

[FINAL WARNING, NSFW BELOW THE LINE]

Cold wind blew through the rugged streets, whistling as it passed through poorly made shacks and campfires. At least a hundred people, including small children and babies, were gathered around the small fires. Their clothes were little more than rags. Suddenly, a woman approached out of the darkness.

She held out her palm, allowing the homeless people of outworld to hastily take the food she has offered them. S/o smiled sadly at the children who attempted to give their food to their parents, only to be rejected. She wished she had enough to feed all of them.

After she ran out of the bread that she handed out, she swiftly climbed up only a nearby rooftop. The air stunk with smoke and human waste. “What’s up s/o? Come to visit me?”

Her heart jolted from her chest, turned around, tackling the man with a hug. He yelped at the sudden contact as s/o peppered his face with kisses. The two turned into a giggling mess as s/o sat up, straddling his thighs. Her smile suddenly melted into bitter resentment when she saw the black dragon uniform. “Babe? What’s wrong?”

“Tell me, kabal, how many children did you steal from today?” She asked coldly, getting off of him. Kabal quickly scrambled to his feet, following her to the edge of the building.

“H-hey! What’s up with that accusation?” He demanded, sitting beside her, his legs dangling off the edge.

“A month ago, half these people lived in small houses. When Kano and his goons started to charge a “protection fee” they were reduced to living out here in the cold.” Her tone held an edge to it. “So tell me kabal, when you were out collecting, how many kids did you see?”

The way kabal grimaced and turned away reminded s/o of a child who knew he was wrong was but too stubborn to admit it. “It's just business, babe. Nothin personal.”

“You’re right, it isn’t personal. Who the hell cares about starving civilians? Not the emperor, not Kano, and sure as hell not you.” Her cold voice growled. “Just business, they’re just numbers to you, specifically check numbers.”

Suddenly, s/o let out a grunt as she was pinned to the ground. Kabal stared down at her, anger in his eyes. “Don’t you put that on me.”

“Oh I’m sorry, is reality ruining your little bad boy with a cause complex?” She yelled, struggling against him, “wake the fuck up, look around, these are real people, like you and me, that you are hurting!”

“Why are you so worried about what I do!? Why can’t you just mind your own damn business!?” He yelled, his grip bruising her wrist.

“Because I love you goddammit!” S/o cried out, kabal froze at her words, grip loosening. The woman below him had tears running down her face, “I love you, more than you know. Watching you burn away your soul like this… it hurts. You’re a good guy, but Kano is corrupting you! And you’re letting him!”

Kabals eyes drifted from her for a second, clouding over with some unfamiliar emotion. The raging storm within his soul was put on pause by a soft hand on his cheek. S/o gave him a weak look. “Please, Kabal, listen. Leave the black dragon, leave Kano.”

“It isn’t that easy.” He mumbled, easing his lower body onto hers. The weight was comforting to s/o as she lifted her head to place a soft kiss into his lips. The man quickly returned it, passionately and desperate. His fingers locked around hers, pressing her down harder beneath him.

Kabals lips broke from hers and latched onto her throat. He hummed as he dragged his mouth across her skin, the rhythmic sound was intoxicating. “No, but I can make it easier.” She whispered.

A startled groan tumbled from his mouth as an knee pressed up between his thighs. S/o could feel the hardness of him through his pants. With agonizingly slow movements, she rubbed her leg up and down. His grip tightened with a growl.

“Is this your way of persuading me?” He grunted, grinding onto her leg. His mouth broke away from her flesh, he looked down atp her, eyes clouded with lust. “Cause it just might work.”

S/o leaned upwards, planting a soft kiss on his lips before pushing him back. The man fell on his back with an oof. Before kabal could even make sense of the action, s/o was atop him.

Placing a hand down onto him, she gently cupped his cheek. He sighed and leaned into it ever so slightly. “Promise me.”

Her thighs clenched around his wait as she steadily grinded into him. He grunted and tried to buck his hips up in pleasure. “I’ll only let you have me, if you promise to leave the black dragon.”

“B-babe- fuck. This is hardly fair, cmon- ah!” S/o slid her hand under her, massaging the hardness between his legs. Kabal seethed and writhed, nails digging into the ground. His eyes rolled back as she unzipped his pants, allowing her fingers to slip in.

Kabal tried to sit up, hand reaching for her breast, only to he pushed back down with her free hand. “Touch me, and I’ll stop.”

Helpless groans and pleas fell from his mouth, turning into moans of pleasure as her hands continued. She rubbed, squeezed and even licked the piece of flesh in her hand, watching each reaction as she did. “Fuck, s/o I’m close.”

Speeding up her movements, he was practically fucking her fist as he arched his back, mouth agape. He was so close only a little more-

Her touch quickly disappeared just as his high was at its brink. The man whined, trying to touch himself, but s/o didint allow him. “S/o, please, cmon.”

“Not until you promise me!” Her hands crashed on either side of his head, staring into his eyes. Her gaze held anger, sadness, regret, love? “You’re better then this, I know you are. Please.”

“I’ll- I’ll only take jobs that don’t hurt civilians, how about that?” He rasped out, at a lost for breath. “I won’t do anymore protection frees, I’ll just do regular old assassination jobs, only for people who deserve it. Bad people.”

S/o frowned, but the heat of her gaze had subsided, she sighed. “I suppose that’s the most I can get out of you at the moment.” Closing her eyes, she rolled on her back beside him. “You better get the most out of me. While I’m still around.”

Despite the threat, Kabal could hear true despair in her tone. She really did love him. Guilt clouded Kabal as he mounted her thighs. Normally there was no slow moments of intamcy, only a deep connection of mutual unspoken passion as they mercilessly merged their body’s. Tonight, that would be different.

S/o flinched in surprise when she felt a soft, pleading kiss flutter on her lips. Her wide eyes stared up as his desperate gaze. There was genuine fear and sadness. “Kabal?”

“Hey, look.” His voice was breathless as he spoke. “You are, the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You have treated me like a human being, which is more then I can say for others. I know, I’m a scum bag, I know I’m everything you’re not. But at the end of the day, you love me, no matter what I do.”

S/o smiled up at him, “I try to hate you, but everytime I try, I just end up loving you more.”

Kabal laughed, giving her a smug look, “guess I’m just that good lookin.” That earned a playful elbow in the back. He laughed once again, “ok, ok, I’ll shut up now. I’ll make you feel good.”

“Yeah?” S/o smiled as Kabal started to unbutton her shirt, exposing cleavage as she wrapped her arms around him.

“Yeah.” His lips connected with hers in a kiss. Hands crept down her body, fingertips tracing her skin, grabbing onto her thighs and separating them. Kabal placed himself between her legs, his pants were still unzipped, his problem was out in the cold air.

Kabal hovered atop her, kiss becoming much more heated as she bit his lip, demanding he give her entrance. He smugly chuckled, holding back a remark as her tongue assaulted his. After a short battle of dominance, s/o was declared the winner as she hastily explored his wet cavern.

Ripping her shirt open and unclipping her bra, sliding it off and throwing it to the side, kabals mouth ripped from her kiss and latched into her breast. S/o released a whiny moan, nails digging into his back as began to lick and suck all over. His tongue traced her skin, searching her the right spot.

Her mouth opened with a gasp as Kabal located a tender scrap of skin and began to abuse it. Biting down in it, only to suck it between his teeth. That was definitely going to leave a Mark.

S/o grinded upwards into his exposed groin. The man moaned slightly, hand reaching down to unzip her pants. His fingers slipped past her panties and into her soaked folds of sensitive flesh. He rubbed and slid his fingers around each crevice, leaving s/o a pleading mess. “Fuck... just fucking do it already.”

“As my girl commands.” He teased breathlessly, positioning himself at her entrance. His fingers took hold of her wrist, pinning them above her head as he entered her at an agonizingly slow pace, allowing himself to stretch out her inner walls. S/o writhed beneath him, clumsy moans dripping from her mouth.

He then proceeded to fuck her brains out. He was FAST like, ridiculously fast. Not superpower fast, but it was clear that he was going to make s/o pay for her teasing.

Hands tangled in hair and nails dug into skin as he drilled into her. She early met his thrust with her own, hips slamming hard enough to leave bruises. Neither of them cared.

Leaning over, his mouth assaulted hers, this time he took complete control of her mouth, invading it as he pleased. The two groaned into the kiss as his thrust became heavier, slower, sloppier.

S/o was left gasping for air as Kabal left her mouth, his saliva decorating her lips. He trailed down kisses from the corner of her mouth to the crook of her neck. His teeth met her flesh, biting and sucking.

They were both getting close already. S/o cried out each time he slammed into her, her face was pure ecstasy. “Kabal! Fuck... I’m-“

“Yeah, me too babe.” He rasped out, grip tightening as his thrust became desperate and rough until finally the knot in s/o’s stomach snapped. The two slammed their faces together, keeping eachother grounded as their release washed over them.

Kabal let go of her wrist, his hands tangling themselves in her hair. One hand drifted down to her side to rub comforting circles in her flesh. His chest steady rose up and down, the rhythmic movement against her made s/o relax her body unde him.

The high started to go down as they broke away. They simply remained still as they caught their breaths. Kabals raspy gulps of air turned into a cocky chuckle, “sombody enjoyed that.”

S/o was too exhausted to playfully slap him, instead she just gave him a look which earned a laugh. “Shut up and take me to wherever your staying. I’m tired.”

“Oh, so we can fuck on the rooftop with pigeons staring at us, but sleeping here? That’s fucking disgusting.” That one gave her the strength to slap him.

[secret-engima]

Ardyn doesn't know his own strength and accidentally helps Niflheim topple Insomnia like, eleven years too early. So he scoops his tiny would-be killer out of the rubble and smuggles him to the Nox Fleurets, presumably to stash for a few years--only, Tenebrae soon falls too, with the rumors of them harboring Prince Noctis (who the Emperor rather badly wants dead, as the Crystal still. won't. accept. him). So now Ardyn has to figure out how to semi-raise Noct into something NOT hopelessly (1/2)

alyss-spazz-penedo

said:

(2/2) civilian and strong enough to fight the gods and fulfill the Prophecy, even as he definitely still hates the child and would quite enjoy seeing him suffer. On Noct's part, he totally knows who Ardyn is and what he wants (thanks Luna), and sure he's glad he wasn't cut down in the raid on the mansion but he's SO unhappy to see Ardyn again.

Me: Oh my word do you even KNOW how angsty I could make this ask? DO YOU EVEN KNOW????? Of course you do you just want to see me suffer.

But just- this could get SO DARK. So abusive. So brutal and even though I would not go full dark there’s still so much ANGST no matter how you look at it.

The worst part is I actually have a bby AU very much like this. Does anyone remember the slightly unstable Imperial!Noctis that showed up in my All Nocti Dissidia AU blurb?

This is basically him.

A Noctis who grew up having lost his home TWICE. First Insomnia, then Tenebrae, both to the same Empire and the same Accursed, and then the Accursed had to RAISE HIM and it was- it was hard. It was brutal. Ardyn raised this Noctis to be a weapon strong enough to destroy him, a politician cunning enough to overthrow him, a scientist smart enough to outthink even Besithia. His only light was Luna, who Ardyn allowed to visit to keep Noctis on his “destined path”, and partially Aranea, who drifted into the young “Chancellor’s Nephew” orbit out of happenstance and then later pity, because she could see the brittle sharp glint in the boy’s eyes and knew an abusive situation when she saw it, and if him hiding in her airship sometimes gave him respite, if that was all she could do to help because Ardyn wasn’t someone she could arrest-.

She tried. At least. She did what she could.

And one of the most angsty bits of this is-

In some warped way, Ardyn and Noctis grow to love each other. Because there are days when Ardyn’s sickness loosens it’s hold enough to let bits of the Healer King and Big Brother shine through, and his touch becomes gentle and his teasing words lose their poison, his hands card through Noctis’s hair and do not scrape at his scalp, and when he speaks of Prophecy there is longing there for rest and repentance rather than poison and mockery for the fate that awaits them both. This is the Ardyn that peaks through when Noctis falls sick after climbing up a mountain in a snowstorm for training, or when he’s too sore to move after a night battling in Ardyn’s daemon training arena learning how to forcibly purify the creatures even though purification is Luna’s magic and not his. This is the Ardyn that holds Noctis close sometimes and sobs apologies into his limp, shivering nephew’s hair because he is aware, at least for a moment, that this child-teen-young-adult is not Somnus and does not deserve to be molded into a weapon of Astral and Accursed alike. This is the Ardyn that Noctis calls Uncle and bitterly, angrily loves in his heart, the one he looks for in the Chancellor’s every morning and quietly mourns when he cannot find him.

The Accursed trains and molds a weapon, a politician, a cunning, sharp mind that can rival his own and someday kill him.

But it’s the little bits and pieces of Ardyn that raise Noctis, a king and a nephew and a son that holds on to the morals Luna gives him with an iron grip, that makes sure Noctis is not completely drowned beneath the Chosen King.

And in the end it is the work of both sides, Accursed and Healer King, that raise up the one who saves the world. It is the Accursed who forged the weapon that hunts down the weapons of the Lucii and steals the lost ring, who steps into the Crystal without flinching and comes out ready to kill.

But it is Noctis who spent years stealing away children from Besithia’s labs so they would not become MT units, who fosters the rebellion and organizes the factions of Lucian, Galahdian, Altissian, Tenebraen, and Niflheim rebels so that they become a more cohesive whole that the Empire cannot isolate and crush beneath it’s boot. It is Noctis who sometimes sneaks into Luna’s rooms at night so that they can just- hold each other, so that Luna can run gentle fingers down his back and remind him what it means to be human, not a weapon, not the King of Light, who shows him the innocent people he must protect and proves to him that they are worth fighting for and keeping safe when it would be so much EASIER to just wage his war and not care about the collateral.

It is Noctis who teaches his stolen not-MT units to be people and to stay safe, Noctis who clings to the sunshine soul of the one who names himself Prompto and follows on his heels into the maw of Ardyn’s brutal training without flinching. It is Noctis who finds Lucis’s Marshal Immortal deep in one of Niflheim’s dungeons and arranges for the rebellion (his rebellion) to break him out. Who gives the Galahdians his magic in the dead of night with a ghoulish mask and cloak to keep his identity hidden from them. It is Noctis who finds the Last Amicitia leading a rebel cell and offers him hope and gains in accidental exchange a protector and Shield. It is Noctis that is tracked down by a young man with glasses and green eyes and loyalty in every fiber, a man who says “I know you are our secret leader, let me help you” and Noctis who is still human enough to be grateful and say yes.

It is Noctis who orchestrated the Empire’s downfall long before he stepped into Crystal, and who’s forces have hemmed and imprisoned the Accursed in the ruins of Noctis’s first home during the ten years he is gone.

It is Noctis, not the Chosen King (weapon, war beast, broken tool) who gently pillows Ardyn’s head in his lap and pets red-violet hair and sings ancient, long-forgotten lullabies as the Accursed (his tormentor, his Uncle, his worst nightmare, his parent) breathes his last.

It is Noctis who ascends the throne of an Empire and reclaims the Crystal (with Luna and a Retinue at his side to keep him from becoming as heartless as the Chosen King that was forged from him) rather than rolling over and dying, because Ardyn gave him training and honed his mind and gave him access to all of Besithia’s knowledge, did he really think Noctis wouldn’t look for a way to weaken and end the Scourge without sacrificing himself for it?

(He thinks perhaps that Ardyn didn’t, that his Uncle-captor-Chancellor-father always intended him to find a loophole in the Prophecy so that he would survive, that even when buried underneath the Accursed, the Healer King still fought to protect the last of his family)

(Then he clutches the cane he has to lean on ever since that final battle and goes to find some wine, because he does not want to think those thoughts. They hurt even worse than his limp and his joints and the lifetime of scars he hides under elaborate black tattoos.)

There.

THERE.

ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?

Or do you want me to ramble about how Cor feels the day he finally meets the mysterious head of the rebellion, who is now the emperor and how he’s suspicious and willing to keep fighting if this man turns out to be corrupt, because he’s heard this is the Chancellor’s nephew, only to feel his heart stop when he sees the profile of the man leaning heavily on a cane and thinks for one second it’s Regis’s ghost before realizing this man is younger and clean-shaven and dressed in a way that shows off the elaborate, scar-hiding tattoos on his arms and shoulders. How he makes some noise in his throat and when their mysterious Chosen turns to look at him Cor finds himself looking into armiger blue eyes and Regis’s face if it had been softened by Aulea’s jawline and made borderline feral by a lifetime of intrigue and abuse thinly veiled as training.

And Cor whispers the name of his best friend’s long-dead son, and the new Emperor’s eyes sharpen as he says, “How do you know my real name? I never told anyone outside my Retinue.” And something in Cor twists with realization.

And there’s also the realizations of Ignis and Gladio years earlier, who don’t KNOW at first who Noctis really is to them until he trusts them enough to reveal his magic and they realize THIS IS THEIR PRINCE. This is their long lost charge who they thought was dead, but has instead been raised by the man who hates him most and yet loves him dearly by turns and all that entails.

And there’s also LUNA. Luna who doesn’t die, but who grows up watching the gentle, smiling boy she first met in Tenebrae get shaped and sharpened and molded into a Chosen King and a beast of war and a tool of destiny, who could so easily become a monster just like the Accursed in all but name, but who FIGHTS it every step of the way even as his light falls away and Luna becomes his only cornerstone for years. His only reminder that there is a life and a purpose outside the Accursed’s plans and the Prophecy that Luna grows to hate, because if it did not exist then the Accursed would have no interest in her friend.

Luna who cries with relief the day the not-MT named Prompto glues himself to Noctis’s side and refuses to leave, because there is an innocent, stubborn light to the boy’s eyes that gently draws Noctis out of the armor that is the Chosen King even when Luna is not there. Luna who rails at the Astrals (at Bahamut, who prevents Shiva and Ramuh from acting) because they can SEE what is happening, yet they will not step in to rescue him, because even now Ardyn is pushing Noctis toward his “destiny” and that is all that matters.

Luna who, years after all is said and done, after the Accursed is laid to final rest and Noctis slowly dissolves the Empire back into free and healthy kingdoms, still has to hold him when he shakes and still has to talk the icy, too-sharp glaze from his eyes when he forgets to be human rather than weapon. Who pushes golden magic into his body even though she knows some scars can never be healed, and who has to talk Noctis down with Ignis’s help from the heights of his utter, visceral horror the day she tells him she is pregnant and Noctis realizes he’s going to be a father, but that he doesn’t know how, because what role model for fatherhood has he ever had and remembered that wasn’t the very man who took his real father away and made him the fractured mess he is?

...

There I think I’m done being brutally angsty now.

Happy notes for an AU like this would be-

Noctis and Luna both live. Ignis does not go blind.

Noctis and Luna have like- five kids and Noctis adores them all once he gets over his visceral panic. He is the gentlest, kindest father. Luna and Ignis and Gladio have to do all the disciplining because Noctis will not raise a hand or voice to them ever, and he has never looked more peaceful then when he is napping with his children in the garden.

Prompto has like- several hundred brothers because Noctis stole bby MT’s whenever he could. Prompto is the unofficial “oldest” brother of them all (even though chronologically he isn't) since he has the ear of the king, and all the clones have fun making themselves unique via hair and accessories and tattoos and clothes and weird names.

Gladio and Aranea are snark buddies, and neither are entirely sure how they got married but they’re pretty sure it was Biggs’ and Wedge’s faults and that Ignis officiated (which isn’t too far off).

Cor gets to spoil all of Regis’s and Clarus’s grandkids like crazy.

Galahd gets rebuilt and gets to be it’s own country. Nyx Ulric and Crowe and all our other fav glaives live and aren’t traitors.

Titus Drautos was one of Noctis’s most loyal double-agents during the rebellion, and frankly he isn’t sure how his retirement still involves him braincelling his Galahdian idiots, but their islands are pretty and its far, far away from any and all Niflheim/Lucian politics so eh, he’ll take it. Now if Nyx would just STOP using him as a babysitting service for the adorable adopted bby Ulrics of his newly remade Clan, that would help his blood pressure so much.

[yandere-sins]

Hmm... Can I request Linhardt or Piers (SWSH) stalking their darling when suddenly she gets kidnapped right in front of them? And then they get kidnapped by the same people for some reason? (I got the idea while reading a yandere webtoon cause for a moment I thought they were going to do this (he rescued her instead) but I still thought it would be a neat dynamic for the yandere character and the darling)

Thanks for requesting! ^-^

»»————-———— ♡ ————————-«« 

It wasn’t exactly the situation Piers had expected to turn into on this fine evening, but he found himself arranging with it. Of course, it had been pure coincidence that he had taken the long way home just so he could walk a healthy amount of steps behind his darling. He wanted to make sure she would get home safely, and well - that didn’t turn out quite like it.

Her shaken form shivered next to him, and if not for the zip tie keeping his hands tied behind his back, he’d have embraced her. Certainly, he was just as baffled about what happened as she was, but he’d be lying if it wasn’t somewhat exciting to finally be as close to her as he always wished he would.

“It’ll be fine,” he tried to calm her, seemingly unfazed by the kidnapping. She sniffled, trying to hold back the sobs to keep her face in front of the pop star. Piers was pretty sure she got a good glimpse at him as both of them got thrown into the minivan, knowing who he was just from his reputation.

She just didn’t know that he knew who she was all too well too.

It was somewhat stuffy in the back of the van, despite it easily fitting a lot of things in it. But next to the two of them, there were some boxes and crates, filled with who-knew-what, probably big equipment. It was convenient for some touches of knees and elbows between the two of them, with almost a romantic sense to it. They only had each other now, to rely on and trust in.

“Once we stop, and they open the door, we slam it into their faces and make a run for it,” Piers explained, and much to his delight, he seemed to have her attention with it. “We can do it.”

“No... I can’t...” she whimpered, shifting next to him. “My foot, they must have slammed it in the door after throwing us in, it hurts...”

“Assholes,” he muttered, meaning what he said. But the next thought he had changed his opinion on their captors. “We’ll still do it, and then you climb on my back, and we hurry off before they know it, okay? It will work, we’ll get out here.”

“O-Okay...” he heard her whisper after a small contemplation. “Do you know what they want? Why us? We just walked on the street, right?” Even scared and worried, his darling was such a curious soul, someone who always wanted to bring light to the darkness. “I... don’t know,” he mumbled, and she nodded, only noticeable now that his eyes had grown accustomed to the dark. “I wonder if they want to do anything to us... That would be so terrible...”

A sudden jolt ran through her as she straightened her back, turning towards him. “I have a knife in my bag! A multitool one!”

“Oh?” he questioned curiously. “How come someone like you carry that around?”

As he followed her idea, dragging the bag that laid at their feet closer, he listened to her explanation, this taking an unexpected turn. “I... I’ve been feeling strange lately. Always watched... maybe that’s the reason we are in this situation now, I’m so sorry... I should have gone to the police already...”

He was lucky she couldn’t see the grimace he made, hearing about her awareness. Piers had been nothing but careful with his observations, and if anything, he was very gentlemanly with everything he did. “Someone would leave presents at my doorstep-” EXPENSIVE presents, he added in his thoughts.  “-and my friends have been acting strangely too... They’ve received letters and phone calls from unknown people warning them about me... Lately, it’s been a lot.”

“Sounds... terrible,” he eventually feigned empathy, pressing the words out from clenched teeth. “Yeah... And now this, I’m so sorry you got dragged into my mess.”

“Doesn’t matter,” he simply cut her off, finally having the bag in a position that would allow them to search for the knife. It was a bit of an act to go through the small pockets and big inside of the fabric until she finally reached for something metal and small. Then again -  who was Piers to complain about their hands brushing, shoulders touching, and the possibility to be so close to her? Another inch forward, and he’d have kissed her without any restraints holding him back.

“I got it!” she whispered excitedly, and together they unfolded the knife from the various applications. Piers was more than willing to volunteer as the first person to free his hands, and his darling did her best to cut him free. If he was honest, he’d miss the closeness the two of them had, but it was necessary to end this on some point.

Hearing the zip tie snap, he was almost too quick in taking the knife from her, seemingly unfazed by the pain in his wrist from being bound for so long, and made quick process with the ties behind her back. Piers allowed himself a quick touch down of her leg while she was still occupied with the feeling of freedom and feeling her hands again. He found her ankle hot and swelling under his touch, thinking quietly to himself just how perfect this all turned out to be.

When the van finally came to a hold, Piers felt nothing but relief that this obstacle finally was going to end, but he noticed how she stiffened next to him, scared and worried, seeing a chance for him. Putting his hands on her shoulders, she flinched under the feeling of the cold steel in his right palm but ultimately relaxed as she realized it was just him and the knife - someone and something she trusted by now. “It’ll be fine, let me handle it,” he promised her. By now, he must have been the prince in her eyes that he wanted to be. She was the muse to his music, and the star in his night sky, so it was only fair that at least once he’d become the hero for her too.

Readying himself as he heard the footsteps rounding the car, Piers made quite a show in slamming the doors open, making his ‘kidnappers’ topple over and fall to the ground. One of them hissed, “What the fuck?!” as he saw Piers standing in front of him, the unexpected addition of a knife sparkling in his hand. But he didn’t say another word after that, leaving only his partner in crime behind. “That wasn’t part of--” the second guy still managed to scream at Piers, before his blood sullied the ground too, but Piers had no time to ponder about the two dead bodies, turning back to the van and ushering his darling out.

“They- They are-” she stuttered, not thinking as she let him pick her up and drag her out of the car. “It’s okay. Everything will be alright. It was self-defense, who knew what else they would have done to us!”

Or said to her.

Or told the police.

He helped her on his back, quickly making his way back to civilization. He would be the hero for her that he was supposed to be. She’d see him as the savior just like she was for him on so many nights where he dreaded his own existence. The two of them finally had this chance to meet, and she’d soon come to realize how great of a man he was, still caring and attentive even after all of his was over. His darling had always been the one to save him, now it was his turn, and no one - NO ONE - would take this away from him.

Dead men couldn’t reveal a carefully planned kidnapping, after all. She’d never know that this all hadn’t been real, but her carrying around a knife had just been too good of an opportunity to waste. Otherwise, the two idiots he hired might have spilled the beans and ruined everything Piers had worked so hard for.

[dreamii-yume]

so for the Twisted Wonderland yandere thing on AO3 how about Leona with a smoll and pure darling who has lately been clinging to him because she has felt like she has been being watched recently not knowing who was doing the watching

♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎

Oh no! Darling has been feeling like someone’s following and watching her lately! So, in the fear of getting pursued anytime soon, she ended up relying on Leona’s help, not realising the real culprit this whole time.

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♥︎ Warnings ♥︎ Yandere | Non-Con | Stalking | Dark Themes | Mentions of Pregnancy

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A shiver went up your spine and you quickly turned around.

There was no one. As always.

It had been like this for the past few days, you would feel eyes striking holes into you but when you would look, nothing was there. You might’ve thought someone was playing a prank on you, like someone could have drank a potion of invisibility to spook you. That wasn’t a likely scenario but it sure was possible, there are a few students who holds quite the distaste for you, after all. But this has been going on for days, there was no way someone would be this dedicated to pull a prank this much, unless you’ve done something really bad to that person. However, thinking hard about it, you’ve never recalled anything of such.

Still, this wasn’t a very funny prank, that’s for sure.

Thankfully, you don’t feel it everywhere, in such places like your classroom. It gives you some sort of relief for once, because it means that the culprit wasn’t in the same room as you, or at least doesn’t seem to be like one of your classmates. But the moment you stepped out of the room, in the hallway, in the cafeteria, in places full of people, that’s when it will strike back up again. It feels dangerous that you honestly feel like someone is going to assassinate you once when they got the chance. You thought being with other people would give you some sort of protection against the paranoia, but it didn’t.

In fact, it felt even more hostile, almost like they were bursting with bloodlust, like it was telling you to get away from your friends. You talked to Ace, Deuce, and Grim about it once but none of them seemed to feel watched as much as you do. This made you think that perhaps, you were overreacting? I mean, there was no way that someone would be this interested in you that you could practically feel them crawling up your skin? You told that to yourself one day, until you came to the terrifying realization that your friends might not have sensed it because it was just focus on you.

Currently, walking home alone does not make it any better at all. There were no students left at this time and the sun had already set, the lamp posts were the only ones to give you light on your way. If someone were really out to get you, there was no more perfect opportunity than this and that’s what makes it more terrifying. Gulping down your nervousness, you tried ignoring that unknown presence and walked faster, the Ramshackle dorm was just few meters away so it was fine. You could make it if you ignore everything else, ignore the footsteps that was going faster as you quickened your pace.

Until someone reached out and pat your shoulder.

You yelped, not being able to handle the pressure any longer and crouched down in a silly way to protect yourself. Your body trembled and you could feel tears pricking in the corner of your eyes, you were not ready to die tonight.

“Hey, what’s up with you?”

You opened your eyes at the familiar voice and turned around to see the Dorm Head of Savanaclaw, Leona Kingscholar. “...Leona-san...?” You called out, as if you weren’t sure if he was real or not.

Seeing how teary-eyed you look, Leona raised an eyebrow. “It’s unusual for you to go home this late and alone, what happen to that little cat herbivore?” He asked, putting a hand on his hips.

You sniffed and slowly stood up, Leona took noticed on how much your legs were trembling. “G-Grim was...held up in Crewel-sensei’s lectures along with Ace and Deuce...” You answered, looking down.

Leona hummed, but it doesn’t seem like he gave a single damn about what you said at all. It was unusual seeing him outside of his dorm this late too and still on his school uniform, you thought. Usually he’d be sleeping somewhere peaceful, where Ruggie or Jack wouldn’t find him. Did he take a liking to a spot somewhere around here?

Then, Leona turned to you. “So, the hell’s got you on your nerves? You pissed someone off or something?” He asked as a joke.

You only bit your lip and looked up to him with a pleading look in which Leona’s eyes sparked in curiosity. This look was enough for him to know that you did not take his words as a mere joke, but possibly a serious fact. Without thinking, you reached out your hands and grabbed the hem of his vest, gently pulling on it. “P-Please...Help me...” You plead with tears in your eyes, swallowing up the fact that you were so desperate to save yourself. “Someone’s...Out there.”

Leona look down at you for a while, you couldn’t really place a finger on what kind of expression he was making. But soon, he gave out a smirk so smug that you feel like he was mocking you. “I see.” He said as he shrugged and pat your head quite roughly, ruining your hair. “It’s troublesome but that look on your face is a sight to see.”

You didn’t really know whether to take that as a compliment or not. You chose to look at it at the bright side, after all, he didn’t exactly say no, did he? He pats your back and began walking towards your dorm. “Come on, I’m taking you home.” He said with a small yawn but without any other complaint.

You blinked, surprised on how he took your request so well. You were almost sure that he would refuse and just leave you right then and there, saying how you should take care of your own problem. Maybe he wasn’t as bad as anyone thought him to be? With that, you smiled, appreciating his help and ran towards his side. You unconsciously grasped the end of his vest once again out of nervous reaction, but Leona didn’t seem to mind.

There was nothing burning holes into your soul anymore. You missed this feeling, you felt safe.

For now.

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“Look at this, Leona-san! I got a 90 for the first time on Crewel-sensei’s test!” You beamed down at Leona, showing your test paper at him, who was nonchalantly laying on your lap. Though, you feel kind of self-conscious as your body was a lot smaller compared to him, making you think that he might not be as comfortable laying on your lap like this. But he wasn’t complaining so you took the chance. You two sat on a shaded bench just somewhere in the school, it was lunch break and you thought how nice the day was. “I guess staying up that late to study was worth it, huh?”

“Yeah, yeah...” Leona said with his eyes close, not bothering to look at what you’re showing to him. But you didn’t mind, you were used to his personality by now anyway. Still, it didn’t stop your mouth from constantly blabbing about your day even if the lion in your lap didn’t seem to care. Well, that was what you thought, not knowing how his ears were actually twitching, attentively listening to every single one of your words.

It’s been a while since you’ve started hanging out with Leona, after you begged him for help that one night. The next day he agreed to do so, you really clanged on to him for protection. Maybe not physically so but the constant grasp in his clothes, hiding behind him, and you frantically looking everywhere just to be with him. Thinking about it now, it made you embarrassed that you were acting almost like an obsessive lover, constantly in need of Leona’s presence. You were surprised that he handled you so well, that he didn’t get annoyed with you too much, putting aside the occasional growls here and there. Overall, he didn’t seem to mind your presence at all, despite the fact that he was so hostile towards everyone from before. 

Maybe his overblotting incident had really did awaken the good in him, even if he isn’t fond of showing it. More importantly, being by his side was probably the safest you’ve ever felt in a while. The strange stalker following you around had practically been non-existent up to this point. You could finally get a good night’s sleep and enjoy your food without losing appetite because of the unnerving glares you get every time you take a bite. It was all thanks to Leona! 

Though, you did notice how weird it is as Leona never actually did do anything about it, he was just by your side this whole time, but it wasn’t like you could imagine him doing anything about it either. This made you automatically assume that your stalker must’ve gotten scared of him instead. You do have the Beast of Savanaclaw himself as a protection, so you wouldn’t really blame that person for staying away. But still, it feels like it was a memory from the past now, nothing to fret over anymore. You made sure to thank Leona for accepting such a weird request on your part, you wonder what he would like in return?

“Leona-san!” A voice called in the distance, slowly coming closer towards the two of you. You looked up and saw the Vice Dorm Head of the same dorm as Leona, Ruggie Bucchi. His eyes looked as bored as ever but lighted up once he saw the person he was looking for. “Ah, there you are. Geez...”

“Oh, Ruggie-san, hello.” You said, smiling at him as the Hyena waved at you, lazily. 

“Hey there, (Y/N). I’ll be borrowing Leona-san for a while.” He said, which made you chuckle thinking how silly it is for him to need some kind of permission from you to do so. Little did you know that Ruggie was almost certain that he was required to do just that. You gestured him to do what he came for, helping him even by patting Leona awake.

“Leona-san...It’s time for class, you know?” Ruggie called, watching how Leona grumbled and buried his face on your stomach. You flinched at that, now that was a feeling you weren’t expecting. Ruggie only sighed at his behavior, scratching the back of his head but he seems to be so used to this kind of routine. “Your teacher’s going to bitch on you again if you arrive late.”

That made Leona sigh in annoyance and grumbled under his breath. He slowly tears himself off you and sat up, massaging his temple. He glanced at you and you gave him a small smile. “Hope you had a good sleep, sorry if you got uncomfortable on my lap...” You scratched the back of your head, sticking your tongue out.

“...Not really.” Leona muttered as he turned away and stood up. “Alright, I’m up. There’s no end to a teacher’s nag so let’s go and take you to your classroom really quick.”

You blinked at him, almost forgetting about the fact that this had been a regular occurrence for the two of you ever since he accepted your request. Usually, you would accept this offer without hesitation but it has been quite a while since your stalker had stopped. You didn’t want to bother Leona with these kinds of silly interactions anymore, not when you weren’t scared anymore. “Ah...That’s no need.” You said, giving him a smile and standing up. “I think I can manage to go by myself now, thank you.”

You noticed how Leona seemed to become a little too quiet for your taste after saying that. It was quite unnerving on how he just stared at you, as if you just did something unusual.

It somehow feels eerily familiar. 

“(Y/N).” Leona calls out, making you flinch in surprise. “Watch your back out there.”

“You never know when someone will just grab you by the neck.”

He seems to be back in his lazy attitude now, giving you his signature smirk. His voice sounding like he meant it as another crude joke but your body stiffened, like it suddenly gone into defense mode. You didn’t want to sound ungrateful but you didn’t like that kind of joke, especially when it hits way to close to your original problem. 

You nod your head without any other question. “I’ll be careful.” You said, giving him a small, but twitching smile. You turned your heel, waving at the two Savanaclaw members and went on your merry way.

A little quicker than usual.

Silence befall on the two beastmen. It was only after your figure disappeared from their sight that Leona heard Ruggie sighed. “I know I’ve been saying this a lot but...” He said, crossing his arms and looking up at Leona with an amused smirk. “You’re really mean, Leona-san.”

“Seriously, you scared her to this extent just so you could come in and be the prince charming? Talk about being cheap.” Ruggie said with the clear intention of pissing of his dorm’s head leader. He got a growl of irritation because of that, but he still considers it as a win. He looked back at Leona, despite his initial thought however, he didn’t seem to be against his decisions.

Leona began to walk away from him, presumably going to his next class, Ruggie followed after him. “She got over her fear of being watched really quick.” He said, yawning.

“Isn’t that a good thing?” Ruggie asked, raising his eyebrow but then he thought about what he said. “...Well, I guess for her, yeah. But for you, I don’t think so.”

Feeling stupid for answering his own question, Ruggie shook his head and looked up at Leona. “Anyways, what do you plan to do about it?” He asked.

“Isn’t it obvious?” Leona smirked, Ruggie already could tell that it wasn’t a good sign but he merely sighed at it. 

“I’m going to be giving her another reason to be scared.”

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Continue the Spice~?

Estimated date release of the next Request in June 19

[ratcarney]

the smile in your face

a note: i completely ignore vicky hugo in the sense that i believe grinpayne was found at eight, not ten. what’s he gonna do, sue me?

after nine years, ursus is still unsettled by grinpayne’s cruel, carved smile.

———

winters were always difficult.

carnivals and fairs didn’t typically stay open when the weather turned dark and cold, and ursus’s main source of income was his lotions, potions, and puppetry business. puppetry became popular around christmastime, but other than that, money didn’t come in very often, and ursus was seldom home. regardless, grinpayne and dea were satisfied with what they had.

fair, fragile dea’s love of the snow and cold weather didn’t stop the chill from seeping into her bones. she fell ill easily in the wintertime, prone to long periods of fatigue and fever. her sleep was fitful and infrequent.

grinpayne did whatever he could. he sang gentle lullabies, told her ghost stories off the top of this head, anything to lull her to sleep.

on the night of the first real snowstorm of the year, dea tossed and turned, shivering under the blanket from both her bed and grinpayne’s. ursus was out, so grinpayne sat with dea, stroking her hair and ensuring she was comfortable. he sang. he spoke. he did everything he could, and eventually, he realized with relief that dea had finally succumbed to the embrace of slumber.

grinpayne sat on the floor with his back against her bedframe. he debated blowing out the candle on her bedside table, but with dea lying only inches from him, he couldn’t risk the smell of smoke startling her awake.

after a few minutes, he heard the rustling of fabric and wood creaking. “grinpayne?” ursus’s gruff voice called.

grinpayne winced as he stood and started towards the door to tell him to be quiet. to his surprise, ursus met him halfway, appearing in the doorway of dea’s little room.

the candle flickered, illuminating grinpayne’s features, and suddenly, time slowed to a crawl.

grinpayne watched in slow motion as the man he had called “father” for nine years lurched back in horror, putting a defensive hand in front of him as a shield. as if grinpayne was going to attack him.

grinpayne’s blood turned cold, then burning hot as the reality of what had just happened sank in.

he saw the regret in ursus’s eyes immediately, but the damage was done. in that split second of fear, grinpayne looked into the horrified expression of a man who was still afraid of him after almost a decade.

“grinpayne—“

grinpayne stopped him with a glare. he pointed outside. dea didn’t deserve to get caught in the middle of what was inevitably bound to happen, especially not after she had finally gotten to sleep.

snow was falling quickly when grinpayne stormed out of the house with ursus at his heels.

“nine years.” he hissed, whirling around to glare at ursus. “nine years, father, and you’re still afraid!”

“you startled me, grinpayne, that’s all!” ursus protested. “this has nothing to do with your face!”

grinpayne laughed bitterly. his breath came out in clouds in front of him, and the freezing air stung his exposed teeth. “then what is it about? because we both know you weren’t cowering at the sight of dea!”

“i did not cower at the sight of y—“

“you’re supposed to be the one person!” grinpayne cried. ursus looked around cautiously, making sure that no one was around to hear them, but grinpayne didn’t care. his voice rose in volume and resentment, competing with the snow to be the coldest thing between him and ursus. “you’re supposed to be the one person that sees me for who i am!”

“i-i do!” ursus stammered, trying in vain to save himself.

“you don’t, father.” grinpayne shook his head. “i know that now—you’re still afraid.” he stepped back with a strangled noise of frustration, running a trembling hand through his dark curls, now peppered with snowflakes. “you think i don’t know what fear looks like?” he took a breath, pulling himself back. just because he looked like a monster didn’t mean he had to act like one.

grinpayne made sure to keep his eyes locked with his father’s, not letting him look away. obviously ursus needed to look at his face a lot more if he was going to get used to it. there was no better time to start than the present. “i know what fear looks like. that, in your eyes? in your stance? in the hand you held up to shield yourself? that, father, was fear.” his words were hushed now.

“grinpayne, i’m not afraid of you, i was just—“

“stop!” grinpayne interrupted. “stop trying to make everything better, because it’s not that easy!” the snow started falling harder and faster, making the barrier between grinpayne and ursus almost tangible. “and lower your voice, father. dea’s sleeping.” he muttered as an afterthought.

“well, of course i’m not making anything better! you’re not letting me get a word in edgewise!” ursus growled. “stop being such a child, grinpayne! not everything is about you!”

grinpayne shook his head, incredulous. “me?” he asked. “me, father? a child?” ursus could see him shiver in the cruel wind, but the fire in his eyes was red-hot. “who takes care of dea when you’re out peddling your potions?” he demanded. “who feeds her? who makes her comfortable?” he paused before dealing the final blow. “who loves her when you’re not around to?”

“i’m trying to get us to a new world, grinpayne! something you would know if you finally grew up and stopped dwelling on the past!” now ursus was angry. he had not raised this boy to disrespect him. “you have no concept of what i do for us. for her. you never have.” ursus stopped avoiding his gaze and looked him dead in the eye. “it’s not my fault people are so afraid of you, so don’t you dare try and pin this on me.”

grinpayne finally went still. the crude smile on his face gleamed in the moonlight.

it was getting late.

“we should go inside, grinpayne. you need to sleep.” regardless of grinpayne’s anger towards him, his fatherly instincts were kicking in. he saw the fatigue in his broken boy’s eyes. he was tired.

not from sleep deprivation, but from the ordeal of being seen as a monster.

he was tired of being feared.

“i’m not finished with you yet.” grinpayne hissed, scrounging the depths of his soul for any extra scrap of strength he could possibly find. “we aren’t done, father.”

ursus rose to his full height in an attempt to intimidate him, but at seventeen, grinpayne had nearly surpassed him in that department. “i think we are done, boy. get inside.”

“no.” grinpayne snapped. “i’m not going to let you ruin dea’s sleep just because—“

ursus had heard enough. whatever remark grinpayne had in store for him, he decided he wasn’t interested. to use their young, ailing dea as leverage to be disrespectful was the last straw. was it not enough that he had saved this boy from certain death? was it not enough that he clothed and fed him? was it not enough that he had supplied this boy with medicine for his pain?

“grinpayne, ENOUGH!” ursus shouted.

behind grinpayne’s wild glare, ursus saw something snap. “lower your voice!”

he all but lunged to get to ursus, murder in his eyes, but once he was in front of him, grinpayne stopped. his once-murderous eyes widened and glazed over with pain. in his haste, he had accidentally torn open one of the many holes in his cheeks that were trying to heal. drops of blood were spotting the pure white snow at his feet before he could say anything else.

without thinking, ursus quickly fished a clean bandage out of his coat pocket. “put this on, boy.”

grinpayne didn’t move, only pressed a hand to the side of his face. he looked shocked, as if surprised to see the blood pouring from his wound.

ursus couldn’t help but soften. “grinpayne.”

“we’re not done.” grinpayne managed, his voice low and hoarse. “we’re not...” at this point, his words were more breath than anything else.

ursus watched blood run between grinpayne’s fingers, racing down his forearm in rivulets. he rummaged in the pocket of his coat for the little bottle that would make everything go away. finally, he found it and thrust it towards grinpayne. “take your medicine, boy.”

grinpayne had his eyes shut tight, and ursus saw his knees shake, the telltale sign that he was about to drop. ursus’s heart twisted in his chest. this was his fault, wasn’t it? if he hadn’t flinched when he saw grinpayne’s carved smile in the flickering candlelight, he wouldn’t be watching his broken boy sputter and cough up his own blood in front of him.

before grinpayne could sink into the crouch he always assumed to manage his pain, ursus heard wood creak quietly behind him.

“grinpayne?” dea called. her voice was soft, barely audible, but grinpayne snapped to attention as if she had screamed for him. “where are you?”

dea.

it was like nothing had ever happened. grinpayne rose immediately, swallowing his pain and the blood that had undoubtedly pooled into his mouth, all to put on a brave face for dea, whatever she needed. he staggered through the snow towards the cart, his shoulder brushing against ursus. on second thought, he took the bandage. dea couldn’t see him, but he couldn’t risk getting his own blood on her clothes or skin.

“thank you.” he muttered.

“i’m sorry, grinpayne.” ursus tried to apologize again, but the boy only rushed to the steps where dea stood.

“what is it? what do you need?” his voice was still quiet, but steady. “come out of the cold, dea. you’re not well.”

“i woke up and you were gone.” dea murmured. ursus watched as grinpayne held her close to his chest.

he did love her.

“i was just talking with father. don’t worry about me—let’s get you back into bed.” he cupped her cheeks. “i’ll give you my coat. i’m here. hold onto me. that’s it.”

ursus wandered back to the steps and sat down. from inside, he heard dea whispering to grinpayne.

“where’s father? is everything alright? you’re shivering…”

“i’m fine, dea. get into bed, and i’ll be back in a minute. i’m just going to check on something.”

after a moment, he heard grinpayne approach from behind him.

he didn’t bother turning around. he knew he would only be met with a withering stare. “grinpayne, lad, i’m—“

“i forgive you.”

ursus blinked. he stood, turning to face his boy. “you...forgive me?”

“yes.” grinpayne shifted his weight from foot to foot. without the animosity radiating off of him, he looked uncharacteristically small. “you’re right to be scared.”

ursus could never fathom having such control of his own anger. he had to admit, save for the occasional agony-fueled outburst, grinpayne simmered in silence. it was truly commendable, especially in a boy of his age.

“no. no, i wasn’t. i was wrong and you don’t deserve it.” ursus said. “i’m...i’m proud of you, boy.”

grinpayne’s eyes widened. it may have been a trick of the light, but ursus could have sworn he saw tears welling in those wounded eyes.

“you’ve grown into a fine young man.” ursus continued quietly. “i’m sorry i’m not home often enough to see him.”

“will you forgive me?” grinpayne asked. “i shouldn’t have said those things. i’m grateful. really, i am. i just…” he shuddered, but didn’t falter. “i shouldn’t have to see the same fear in your eyes that i see in everyone else’s.”

“i know. i know, lad. i’m so sorry.” ursus took his shoulders, felt his frame through the fabric of his shirt. he remembered grinpayne’s first ragged gasp of agony as he kneeled in front of the fire, the heat thawing his terrible, permanent grin. he remembered holding the boy’s numb hands as he recounted the horrors he had met in the cold, dark forest. he remembered the first time grinpayne had called him “father.”

“please forgive me, father.”

ursus put a hand to the back of grinpayne’s head. “i do. come here, boy.” he pulled grinpayne close to him in a tight hug. he felt his arms around him and breathed a sigh of relief. after a few moments, ursus pulled away to hold his boy at arm’s length.

“can i…?”

grinpayne knew immediately what he was asking. he nodded weakly.

slowly, almost tenderly, ursus unwrapped grinpayne’s face. he saw the tension return to the boy’s shoulders as he braced himself for what ursus would say. it broke ursus’s heart to see that his own boy was afraid of what he might think.

ursus lifted grinpayne’s chin and tilted his head to the side so he could assess the damage. the hole in his cheek was ragged, but not as deep as it looked. raw and scarlet, it decorated the edge of where the corner of his lips should have been, still leaking blood.

with the right care, it would heal nicely.

“let’s get you cleaned up.” ursus said. he put a careful hand on grinpayne’s shoulder, but to his surprise, grinpayne leaned into him of his own accord.

forgiveness.

winters were always difficult, but as a man mended the hole in his son’s cheek inside a little cart in the snow, it seemed as if the worst was behind them.

[anika-ann]

Errare Humanum Est - Pt.6

Holy Wrath

Type: series, soulmate AU series  (part 1, part 2)       x Supernatural

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader (past?)    Word count: 2380

Summary: Things get messier. ‘Natasha Rogers’ is not the only lost soul... and God always works in mysterious ways, doesn’t he?

Warnings: mentions of violent deaths and torture, amnesia, swearing, supernatural stuff... and angst with some hope in it ;)

Story masterlist

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Two businessmen faced each other in a shadowy room with unpleasantly sterile lights; an attentive eye would recognize they found themselves in a vault due to the heavy door with a golden wheel opening and the drawers lining the walls. A small army of heavily armed men along said cases created an air of being secure as much as in danger.

Just standing in such room put a weight on one’s chest – especially with the terrifying chair with straps and heavy panels ready to ruin human mind, a tranquilized man trapped in it.

Of course, one of the men facing each other, the older looking one, had no reason to feel threatened. He was simply doing business here and the army was at his side. His wrinkled face was scrunched in a grimace though, deeply discontent as he stared at the other man in no less expensive suit, but with an almost friendly glint in his eyes, a bit goofy face with a beard, framed by curly dark hair.

One would feel pressured in such space to begin with, but now, the two ‘businessmen’ built up an atmosphere nearly suffocating, a tension cuttable with a knife. The suspicious calmness of the goofy man was extremely irritating to the other.

Because clearly, they had made a mistake. A really fucking big one. The blond old man clenched his fists as he continued the rather loud conversation with the man who had showed up out of nowhere, claiming to share his interests and offering a lot of money.

Dammit, he should have known better than take an advice from him!

The mess they were in now!

“You said that killing her will bring a stop to the Avengers, because he was sickeningly in love with her,” the blond strained through his teeth, tone dangerous to cover up his growing fear for their mission. “That he will be grieving so much that he won’t be able to fight! He’s fighting like a madman!”

The dark-haired man only smiled, shrugging as if it wasn’t a big deal. “Perhaps he reacted differently than we expected him to.”

“PERHAPS!!” echoed in the vault madly, making several people flinch. Not the one who was being parroted mockingly and with rage though. “He’s taking down our facilities. One. By. One!”

“Seems like fate wanted it that way. Or, you know, God’s will-“

“I don’t give a damn about God’s will!” the blond sputtered back.

His business partner made a face, his grimace as if saying ‘ouch’. His tone when he spoke up told the same tale. “Well, I…. I wouldn’t say that if I were you.”

“Why? Because the holy wrath will be set upon me? Please. There’s no God. And if there was, he sure would like me doing what-”

The blond’s bright blue eyes seemed to bulge sickeningly as his fingers reached for his throat, struggling to take a breath all of sudden, unable to finish his sentence. He stumbled back with an accusing and yet bewildered gaze, causing all of the men draw their weapons and aim them at the supposed enemy.

An enemy who only tilted his head, otherwise not doing a thing. Was he even the cause of the older man choking? He couldn’t, right?  How would he?

“Wh-ah-I..?”

With a flick of a hand, all of the soldiers fell to the ground, unconscious.

The men who were sitting at the monitoring would have seen that it happened all over the facility, hidden in one of the biggest bank in Washington, but they didn’t – they lost consciousness as well.

The goofy man gave his partner a tight-lipped smile, almost patronizing.

“Ah. I don’t know. ‘He who lies in His name shall choke on his own false tongue’ feels pretty real now, doesn’t it?” he exclaimed and repeated the motion that had sent all of the armed men to the floor. He pointed at his hand then, grinning like a kid, genuinely excited. “I love to do that for effect. I don’t have to, a thought would be enough, but the dramatics is exceptional.”

He snapped his fingers then, suddenly standing in front the choking man in more comfortable clothes of jeans and lose plaid shirt. He allowed the other man to breathe in so he wouldn’t pass out; yet, he wouldn’t be able to speak just yet.

“If I had let you continue your… master plan without my good advice, you just might have succeeded,” he hummed, strolling through the sea of sleeping men, careful not to step on any. He shook his head, a parent’s disproval, a disappointed Father regretting not raising his sons better. “But humans, like every other creations, no matter how beautiful, are flawed. Money, oh money… why are you, my children so greedy, so trustful to anyone who offers you a coin….”

“Grzhmchr-“ was the only sound leaving the other man’s throat as he fell to his knees, fear flashing in his eyes along with more and more confusion.

“What can I say. Nobody’s perfect. And strings of fate are funny things when played right… they can orchestrate a lovely sound,” the dark-haired man mused, turning to face his former partner fully. “Have a good day, Director Pierce. The Avengers should find you here at their next mission.”

With the last words spoken, Director Pierce’s grip on his own throat eased and his body fell limp to the ground. The other man smiled when he saw his chest rise and fall periodically, assured none of these men were actually dead. That wasn’t the plan, after all. They needed to face a different kind of justice.

He glanced at the electric chair then and the man lying there, breathing shallow, heart-rate alarmingly low for anyone but him and one more person whose cells had been modified to endure almost anything… even an explosion despite running straight into it.

“Ah, such troubled soul…” the powerful man sighed longingly, his face twisting with sympathy no one had provided to the prisoner not only of war, but also his own body. He walked to him slowly, a healing hand hovering over the man’s forehead. “You lived through more than you should have, my friend. You shall start your healing.”

The soft light shone above the pale skin, gently sweeping in, illuminating the veins running over the surface, disappearing in the messy hairline. The lying man blinked his eyes open and quickly backed into the backrest before his training kicked in.

It was just such a confusing wake-up. He felt too lightheaded, his chest less constricted than usual, missing a crushing weight. His thoughts… flowed in an unfamiliar way – a way he forgot that existed. His instincts screamed to reach for the other man’s throat to grab him and interrogate him, because he wasn’t his master, but… at the same time, he didn’t quite want to do that. No one told him to do so. He felt uneasy and bewildered, yes, but not in danger.

Still, he listened to his training and his hand shot up, only to grasp thin air. The man had already moved away, causing the freshly woken up man blink in surprise and break his bonds instinctively to follow.

But the man, who had forced him to wake up after they had sedated him, smiled at him kindly. It scared the shit out of him, not that he would admit it. Kindness scared him – he wasn’t used to it, not really, not anymore. Whenever someone showed some, it came with a price of a human life. Now, his mind flooded with images of empty eyes, accusing him of doing the wrong thing instead of a right one as he had been promised.

And this man was to blame for these overwhelming sensations, perhaps was responsible of the men on the floor too.

Were those… masters of his… unconscious? Dead? No, no dead, their chest was rising and falling. Only not conscious then. Who the hell was this man?

“Who-what-?” he choked out, glaring at the stranger. Why hadn’t he attacked him yet? Didn’t give him an order, said the words that… would they still do that to him? That… that thing when his body wasn’t quite his? Flip the switch?

The switch… it seemed to be missing now. Where the hell had it gone?

“Sergeant Barnes, welcome back.”

“How- what did you-- who are you?” Barnes finally sat up straight, his head swimming unpleasantly. He overcame it and forced himself to stand.

Holy shit, the world was spinning. Also, it wasn’t any making sense, sending one confusing signal after another. Barnes’ mind was a mess. He remembered this was his name, even though lately he had been called that name rather mockingly, more used to being a soldat.

The only other conscious man held out his hand as if in a comforting gesture.

“Easy. I’m not here to hurt you. But unless you want to be found by the Avengers, by heroes who include your best friend, you better go find your peace and meet them when you’re ready.”

Forget about the world not making sense. Now it went entirely crazy.

Best friend. Steve. Could this man talk about Steve? Avengers? Who the hell were the Avengers? So many images flickered through his head, but it didn’t include any… Avengers. Images of the past, tens of years ago, clear and sharp as they shouldn’t be, an angry tiny blond swaying his fists and wishing to take on the world and then suddenly growing several inches, and all of that mingled with fragments of memories not quite his and yet his only. What year was it anyway?

He grasped on the only thing that seemed to comfort him, ground him, the only thing he was sure of.

“My best friend? It’s… is Steve still alive? It’s been about seventy years-“ Right? “-on and off— how do I know that? Shit, what did I do?”

The empty eyes staring at him. Oh god, the empty eyes... life vanishing under his hands – a flesh one and a metal one – hands crimson with blood…

His breathing picked up, his head pounding with an ache unknown and the other man grimaced again at the agony he saw. He didn’t think he should interfere more though – Barnes needed to deal with this on his own terms.

“Calm down, James. None of that was your fault and until you accept that, you’d better off without them. The Avengers,” he explained, but the soldier would have none of it, the horrifying images, feeling so disgustingly wrong as his little soul had been locked in a mind of a dull servant, crying when taking a life.

“I… the things I did, oh my god-”

“You are not to blame for what they forced you to do. I could make you forget, but that would only complicate things,” the bearded man thought out loud, only brining more chaos with his words. He tried his best to sound soothing. “Try to forgive yourself and when the time is right… you’ll see your friend again.”

“He might be dead by then!” Barnes blurted out, suddenly overtaken by panic. Steve was alive. If this man was right and Steve was alive – how did he know that, who was he, how- Steve. That little punk letting the army experiment on him only to- where was he, how was he, what- “He’s like… what year it is exactly?”

“2013,” came the resigned reply.

“He’s ninety-five. Ninety-five! If he’s still l alive, I have to see him!”

The calmer man held out his hand again when the soldier unmistakably headed to the exit. “He’s been met with nearly same fate, James. Do not worry about his vessel. He is well. I mean… kinda. He’s been on edge, lately.”

Barnes wavered. This man had been gentle with him, as if he wanted to help. He knew way too many things, probably not lying so far. It was all kinds of fishy.

“Alright, I’m gonna ask again. Who are you?” the soldier demanded, eyes narrowed.

He didn’t feel the need to actually attack the man and he didn’t know why and he was afraid and confused and everything hurt, his arm felt heavy despite the muscles adapting ages ago and he had to see Steve if he was still freaking alive and- but after everything he had done--

“You’re not asking the right questions. Go, James. Find your place in the world again and learn about what happened to your friend,” the man advised again patiently. He beckoned to the men on the floor; instinctively, Bucky knew they were bad. Rotten even, and not just because he could suddenly see through all their lies. How, by the way? “Leave these men for the Avengers to find. They are not your problem, I’ll take care of them. You’re free now.”

Bucky Barnes looked around, not assured. His heart was racing, almost as fast as his mind. He had messed up the world, hadn’t he? The least he could so was to deliver these men to… what, police? Justice?

“But-“ he started up defensively, but out of blue, he found himself in a dark alley – and the man was still facing him.

What the fuck got him here and was this man some sort of a… was magic a thing? This couldn’t be result of some serum, right?

“You-“

“Go,” the man asked of him kindly, adding a smile that looked even goofy, in a stark contrast to his serious eyes. “What you saw, that’s how the justice will find them.”

Was this guy a friggin’ mind-reader too?!

“What the hell?!” Bucky just choked out, frantically scanning his surroundings.

Where was he anyway? The noise of today’s world was hurting his ears. What was he supposed to do? He only knew mission for the past decades, his will not even his own, how was he supposed to proceed?

Finding peace as the man had told him wasn’t exactly a precise order – and yet it was, the most difficult order he could remember receiving.

“Goodbye,” said the man for a good measure, walking away and leaving the poor soldier dumbstruck in a foreign city, in a foreign life.

Barnes stared after him, unable to say a word, unable to move a single muscle. Then, before disappearing among the people roaming the streets in what could be a very late hour, the mysterious powerful man glanced over his shoulder with a last smile and whispered barely audible – not for supersoldier’s ears though.

“Oh, and Bucky? Name’s Chuck.”

༻༺༻༺༻ღ༺༻༺༻༺

Part 7

༻༺༻༺༻ღ༺༻༺༻༺

Alternative chapter title – Let’s Make Things a Bit Messier ;) If you didn’t watch Supernatural, Chuck is… Chuck is a powerful being and you might have figured out who exactly… yes, SPN went there.

One more surprise appearance in the next chapter ;)

Thank you for reading! 

[sopxhiea]

Conscientious

Alfie Solomons X Reader 

○ “I’ll tell you everything you want to hear.”  “The whole truth?”  “Yes, starting with how ugly that shirt is.”

The clouds were long gone in the dark night sky, the moon and her lovers decorating the black canvas as they shone brightly, illuminating the whole city. The streets were clear, unexpectedly quiet while the cozy homes filled with people and their loved ones were just as lively as they’ve ever been. It was a lovely Friday night around London, most souls tucked away in the comfort of their own homes while some carriages passed by the buildings every now and then.

The bakery was similar to the street, empty as the workers were long gone after the boss had given them half the day off. The place kept its usual smell, rum and sweat with a hint of freshly baked bread, it was Friday after all. Friday meant that Y/N was coming around and the workers had been looking forward to it, knowing their boss was fond of the young lady. They were proven right when he came beaming out of the office, telling the lads to fuck off to their homes and returned to his place, giddy like a kid.

It was the third time Y/N had visited him, her effect on him slowly becoming more and more obvious to every soul around Alfie. Y/N was a business associate, as she would like to explain it, someone Alfie had been keen on working bur hadn’t gotten the chance before. They knew each other from a couple years ago when they had met on a joint business venture to the Shelby company, something they’d been keeping at the back of their minds ever since they’d run into each other couple of months back.

Alfie trusted Y/N, more so than he trusted some of his employees. She had built her own castle in this mess of a place and Alfie was more than willing to give her a crown if she’d ever ask for one. She was a tough one, a little too direct but extremely modern. Alfie knew, for a fact, that they could talk about anything after having a few drunken nights all those years ago. He had also been an admirer ever since he’d met her but that was besides the point why she was there.

When it came to business, Y/N didn’t flinch. It had taken her a lot to be where she was and she had no intentions of ruining that for another person, let alone Alfie. She was particularly fond of him, as her secretary would also admit, she had a soft spot for the Jewish man. Maybe it was the memories, the times they’d spent. It wasn’t much, just a couple of months years back but spending everyday together in a close hemisphere had made them see each others’ true colours. 

After that passage of time of knowing each other and getting to see the real faces behind the masks they had to put on in a place of business, there was a hint of surprise they still carried to this day. Ever since then, Y/N had grown even more into a beautiful lady who was also known to be lethal, she had blossomed even more so than Alfie would’ve thought possible. It had taken him a moment to realise the fact that the little young lady he once knew had grown into a magnificent lady who had also built an empire for herself, he was pleasantly surprised once again.

She had come to his office that Friday night in the hopes of finalising the terms of a new agreement he had proposed. He wanted to see the way her company worked, whether anything had changed in his absence and he wanted to see her brilliant work at mind once more. She had stormed out of his office the last time they’d tried to get a final result on the terms because of how stubborn he was about the things he wanted, but it was too bad since she was even more stubborn and stern about the things she knew she was worthy of.

The room was dimly lit, both their secretaries sitting on the same sofa, waiting for their others for the past hour. Ollie had been yawning while Joe, her secretary, had been finding it hard to keep his eyes open. It would be a miracle, Ollie thought, if they could come to an agreement about the terms. They were both equally stubborn and Y/N found it hard to keep herself from reaching for her blade that she’d tucked under her skirt and reach for his neck. He could be utterly annoying when he wanted to.

“I’m not changing my mind.”   she spoke, Joe sighing behind her, knowing her boss too well at this point.

“Well, neither am I, love.” Alfie said, his tone a little hoarse due to the late hours of the night.

They both sighed, knowing that in the last hour, they had made no literal progress. Some things Alfie demanded from her in this agreement made no sense, she knew of his business and could guess what he wanted out of this deal and certain things just didn’t seem to align in her mind. She got up, walking around the room that was slowly becoming familiar to her in the last couple of weeks. She turned to him with one hand on her hip, the other motioning up in the air.

“Why on earth do you need the warehouse in Birmingham?” she asked, finally addressing what she’d been meaning to in the last two hours.

Alfie had no business in Birmingham as of late, Y/N needed the warehouse for a potential deal she was going to be making tomorrow so the matter was urgent. Alfie had been persistent of a couple of terms including this, and especially this, Y/N wondered why he kept pressing on it and now was as good time as any to address the rumbling thoughts she’d been having on her mind. Alfie slowly reached for his beard, humming for a while and nodding, understanding where she was going with the argument.

“I need it, right, for a fucking job, love.” he said, watching the way her body reacted to his words. Her eyes rolled, earning a small chuckle from his lips while she shook his head, finding  it childish how he had been so persistent on that one term.

“So do I.” she said, her words breathy. She didn’t want to argue with him but still wanted to get what she wanted out of the deal.

“Why the fuck do you need it?” he asked, getting up and pointing a finger at her.

He knew she had no business around Birmingham either, no business that would bring good anyway. He knew she had worked with the Shelby company before as well as a couple companies that weren’t all so trustworthy. She was going to do something new, he could tell. He didn’t want her to go into a dangerous territory even though he knew she was more than capable of handling herself. He had seen her wipe out 3 men on her own once with no help, she would be alright but he was suspicious regardless.

“I have a new job, you silly man.” she said, anger apparent in her voice, she wasn’t afraid of getting mad at Alfie. If anyone should be afraid, she thought, it should be Alfie. 

“Who’s this job with then?” he snapped back immediately, her anger becoming even more evident.

To tell the truth, Alfie loved her rage. She could kill a dozen man if she wanted when she was angry, he found it so entertaining to the point of slight arousal. She sighed, chuckling sadly while glancing at the built man in front of her, she was way shorter than him but her anger didn’t fade the slightest when he glanced down at her. Oh, how lovely would it feel to kiss her, Alfie thought to himself

“A new client.” she breathed out, incredibly mad at him now that he was towering above her. He started to moving around while speaking.

“You’re being exceptionally vague about the details of this new job, little one.” he cooed, loving how angry she had become. She exhaled loudly, she hated that nickname, it made her feel small.

“You don’t trust me?” she asked, slight disappointment in her tone of voice while Alfie once again tugged at his beard, thoughtfully looking at her eyes but not saying a word. “Fine.”she sighed, throwing her arms up in the air while Alfie watched her, almost adoringly. He wanted to kiss her.

“I’ll tell you everything you want to hear.”  his eyes were glistening now as she spoke. She was tired and it was way too late for her to deal with this. She wanted to go home so that she could take a bath and sleep this feeling of unease off of her. 

“The whole truth?”  he asked, liking the way she was cooperating at last. Alfie wouldn’t let go of this information and she knew that, she was well aware of the bond they’d formed over their business and Alfie knew she could trust her, too.

“Yes, starting with how ugly that shirt is.” she said, a daring look on her eyes that showed the fire inside. Her mouth formed into a smirk when Alfie shot her a look containing both surprise and delight. She was ballsy, nothing new but Alfie loved it when she caught him off-guard.

“Aye, no need to insult me shirt now.” he said, chuckling as she sat down on the chair once again, the assistants were long gone. She was feeling dizzy, she hadn’t eaten anything in a while and this had been a long day to say the least.

She blinked, feeling too much all at once. Alfie saw the glimpse of unstableness in her eyes and offered her some sweets. She slowly thanked him while devouring them, feeling much better now that she had eaten. Alfie knew how hard she worked and that she would sometimes, on occasion, forget to eat much like he did sometimes. There had been times where she’d worked too hard, causing her to have a little dizziness to her walk that Alfie took a notice of and he would carry her weight in his arms after offering her to lock arms, his way of showing care.

“I found this new fabric dealer uptown, talked to Tommy and he said the dealer was safe.” she spoke, fabric was code for her line of business, gangs and guns to be exact, it was a word that came out of habit at this point and Alfie nodded. “And that shirt really needs a good cleaning.” she said, chuckling while her eyes came to life under the dimly lit space. He returned the gesture with a nod of his head and a smirk on his lips.

“You offerin’, love?” he asked, adding a wider smile to her lips as she shook her head.

“Most definitely not, Alf.” she said, leaning back on the chair as he looked at her.

“But I’m sure my maid can take care of it in no time.” she said, a devilish smirk on her lips as she lured the man in.

He adored her desperately, she was aware of it to some extent. A woman in this business, especially a woman dealing guns that looked like her, wasn’t a common occurrence. Combining that with their shared history was enough to reveal certain things to the bare eye. She felt like a part of something he’d been missing. He didn’t believe in soulmates, people fitting together like a piece of puzzle was just made up crap for people who liked to believe in tales, he knew that. 

But the way he felt about her, he had grown to love the changes and the alterations she had. She was the fiercest person he knew and hell, he’d been to war. She was modern, reckless when needed to be and a piece of art walking around in this mess of a town. He could do nothing but adore her from where he sat as she smiled at him, a part of his heart feeling giddy due to the fact that he knew that smile was reserved for him.

“I just want you to be careful, alright, love?” he asked, she nodded, avoiding eye contact because she knew he’d make her feel bad, for not consulting him about the thing even though he had no business in what she was doing.

“Sometimes, it seems as though you forget who I am.” she said, breathy as her words sounded nothing but like a mere melody to his ears. He chuckled, nodding in understanding. 

“No, I fucking remember, yeah.” Alfie said, standing up and shaking his hand in the air. He knew it very well, the things she was capable of doing.

“Crystal clear.” he spoke, breathy words that sent shivers all over her body. She hated how her body would betray her.

Alfie was an attractive man, she had heard women’s whispers all around town about how dashingly charming he was and she knew it first hand. There was also a part of her that needed to keep things professional, under control much like she did with any other situation. She was scared that one that her mind would be the one to betray her and she would say just how obsessively she thought about him at times, the betraying mostly came out of her body these days.

It had been a while since she had been to bed with someone. She didn’t just sleep with anyone and her work kept her busy. She heard about a few toys her friend Natalie tried to give her along with their huge batteries but she refused, she’d much rather to have the real thing. With running from one place to the other, she had forgotten what sex felt like at some point, it had been far too long and his lingering blue eyes didn’t help at all.

She shifted on the chair, pressing her legs together even more so. Natalie would make so much fun of her if she saw just how desperate she was at that given moment. She was put in heat by the strangest things these days but Alfie had been a long time coming, she was put in heat because of him many times before and this certainly was welcomed by her. She enjoyed the handsome man and his company quite a lot.

Alfie noticed the way she shifted, she was oozing with heat according to what he felt like. He would like it very much if she’d made a move on that tension that had been building up any time now, he was trying his best to act like a gentlemen but the little smirk that formed in his lips said otherwise. There had also been times where Y/N had given him a rush of excitement that quickly turned into arousal, he had his own ways of getting rid of it.

She sighed. “You old man.” Y/N spoke with a chuckle, he enjoyed seeing her laugh way too much.

“I am getting fuckin’ old, yeah.” he said, joining her in a daze. The tension was long gone but there was a hint of reality in what Alfie just said.

“Well, I happen to think old men are quite charming.” Y/N breathed out, watching his expression change under the dimly lit room.

She desperately fancied him, no matter how much she tried to put it behind doors and forget the starry eyes he had. He felt similar things, his heart was a tired one but she made him feel like he had never gone to the war, like things would really be alright at the end. She smiled, it wasn’t a wicked one like her usual charm would bring but a genuine one that erupted a small groan from him, he was so mesmerised by the smallest of acts.

“I happen to think you’re just as wicked, little one.” he spoke, not hiding behind the shadows this room had and looking at her directly in the eye.

She didn’t flinch, it was what Alfie liked about her. Instead, there was a warm hue spreading along the lines of her eyes, telling Alfie just how much she enjoyed this talk. She had been waiting for a step taken from his side and now that he gave it, she was more than content. She wasn’t sleepy anymore, not as much since Alfie was giving her the attention she so badly craved.

Just when she was about to speak, Ollie and Joe came in.

Hope was a dangerous thing, she had learned that the first time she danced around in her uncle’s garden. She’d hoped that it would be a good day but ended up with three corpses, all of them of family. She knew not to be hopeful and to keep her intentions to herself and herself only. This world worked in murderous ways and she didn’t want to break herself, let alone her heart. She had guarded her heart quite well until this point. There had been no one, except her deceased father, able to crack down her walls. She had promised herself that she would keep her heart in somewhere secluded, so that no one could hurt her, no one would be able to.

But there she was, hoping that he’d ask her to stay or even better, ask to see her again. If he didn’t, she knew she would visit soon regardless, she wasn’t just going to let this conversation slide, she needed to something about it. She wanted to, that was the reasoning if she was honest with herself.

“Well, then, Mr. Solomons..” she said, getting up while her mind screamed her to stay but Joe was putting her coat while her eyes bored into his.

“There’s a charity event I will be attending in two days time..” she said, slowly and in a mere whisper but he had heard it. “If you’d like to accompany me, Joe will give you the details.” she said, a smile on her lips.

There it was, she has asked Alfie out because he was playing too many games and she fancied him entirely too much to not do anything after what he just told her. She walked out, leaving Alfie with an impressed smirk as Ollie took the information from her assistant.

[salstray]

MerMay - Siren Songs

Me? Posting Mermay on the last possible day at 10:37 pm?

Yes. Yes I am.

This is my first for real, self written story I’m posting here and I want you to know that I finished this a few days ago at 1 am and skim edited it. Its a little under 7,000 words. 

But I hope you enjoy anyway! Feed back is deeply appreciated. 

       "Hannah!"

       I sighed.

       Here I'd been, sitting on a lovely rock near the reef, warming myself in the sun. My deep blue tail had been resting in the shallows, every now and then flicking cool drops of water up over my stomach and arms.

       And of course, it had to be ruined by someone. The same someone that always ruined it!

       "What do you want, Alli?" I asked, propping myself up on my elbows. I reached up with one hand, pushing my dry, loose hair out of my face as I stared the younger Mer down.

       She sank lower into the water, her inky black hair pooling around her pale face.

       "Reus told me to come get you. The Siren's are coming up from the depths today and Maru doesn't want anyone in the shallows when they go hunting."

       I perked up at that.

       The Sirens!

       Deep sea Mers that spent most of their time in the total darkness of the ocean floor. They only came up during the busy fishing season of summer to hunt. Once a year! And this year, I'd finally get to see them!

       I'd always been to young to be allowed out when they'd come by in the past. But now, I was finally of age to be let loose whenever I chose to be. Maru could keep my reined in, but she couldn't keep me out of the fun this year!

       "Why didn't you say so sooner! When are they coming?" I asked, rolling myself off the rock and into the water. She swam back as I twisted towards her and we ducked our head's below the surface as she began to lead me back towards the drop off, where our Pod made our home.

       "Reus said it should be in about an hour... do you think they'll be close to the reef?" I could hear the fear in her voice. She was still young. Young enough that she'd be taken inside when they did finally appear from the big blue expanse of the sea. And she'd always been taught to fear the Sirens.

       Of course, so were all other Mer children, but it didn't stick for all of us like it did for Alli.

       "I don't know. This'll be the first year I get to watch! Next year, you can swim with me! If I manage to make a friend, I'll be sure to introduce you when you're old enough."

       I had to hold back laughter at the sight of her stricken expression.

       We swam farther into the water, following the slope of the reef as it angled down into the water. Fish joined us for a while before moving on to the corals and sand. We passed a reef shark on our way, which Alli gave a gentle pat as we passed.

       When we reached the drop off, Reus was waiting for us.

       Where Alli and I were simple Mers, with colored tails and rounded fins, Reus was a scout.

       His tail fins were sharp and he had more then just that. Along his spine was a spiked fin and down his forearms he had two more, which were flatted against his skin as he floated motionless in wait for us.

       My tail was bright blue and sparkled in the sunlight. Alli's was a silvery green that matched her eyes. Reus was all grey. From his fins to his skin, he was a single color, save for his eyes, which were completely black.

       "That was quick," he stated, circling us as we dove down to the rocky shelves and caves that our pod had made a home out of.

       "I'm eager! I can't be shoved into the darkness this year! I finally get to see them, Reus!"

       "I just want to get inside," Alli muttered.

       Reus narrowed his eyes at me as Alli swam into the arms of her mother.

       "You shouldn't be so excited, Hannah. The Sirens rarely speak to us."

       "I don't care if they speak to me, Reus. I'm sure they'd be just as riveting conversationalists as you," He frowned at me. "I just want to see them. I want to see how their different from us."

       "That's also not something to be excited for. They look like us, but with sharper teeth and darker colors."

       I rolled my eyes at him, using my tail to propel myself down into the thin fray of Mers my age that were excited to see the Sirens.

       Reus took to paroling along the edge of the reef as I vanished into the group. Most of the others were full of fear as much as they were full of excitement. Some of them, the young scouts and males of our pod, wanted to use it as a show of dominance. How they'd do so, I'd have to wait and see, but I swam as close to the deep water, down where the bravest or stupidest of us were.

       Which of those I was depended on who you decided to ask.

       "Hannah."

       I winced at the tone of the voice, as it was one I knew well. The three other Mers that floated down here with me shared a look, then glanced over my shoulder with bright, innocent eyes.

       I turned, turning to look at Maru with a sheepish grin.

       "Hi Maru. Come to look for the Sirens?"

       She narrowed her sharp, orange eyes at me, a frown just barely tugging at her lips. Her maroon tail flicked below her, a sign that she was irritated. Probably by me. It was usually by me.

       To my surprise, however, she closed her eyes and let out a deep breath. For the first time in my life, I watched her body relax.

       "Yes. I have. I've also come to make sure none of you get to close. They may be cousins of our kind, but they are still dangerous. They come up to hunt. Some of them will be ravenous, so none of you get to close," At that, she gave the boys behind me the same stern look she'd just given me and I heard a few mumbled words of acceptance as she looked back to me. "And its easier to listen for them. They sing as they approach."

       My eyes widened as she smirked and swam up towards the main bulk of the group, herding a few bold Mers back towards the sheer cliff that we lived against.

       Sure enough, I could hear them before I could see them.        It was a beautiful, haunting melody, that was mixed with countless other voices from across the sea.        The bulk of it was female, but I could hear the deep tones of the males at the same time, giving strength to the rising chorus.        The first one I saw was a woman.        Her hair was dark as the night sky and flowed down towards the bottom of her tail. Her skin was pale as the moon and her eyes were completely clouded over from the time she'd spent down in the deep. Her tail was long and thin, the tails at the end jagged and sharp. Her scales were the same black as her hair, but shone as though stars were piercing through them. She was quite clearly the leader of this pod.        Her lips were just barely parted, leading the Sirens Song with her deep, mournful voice. She rose past us, appearing from the darkness and tilting to swim off into the empty blue waters of the open ocean. She ignored us completely.        Below her, more of them appeared.        All of them were the color of night. All of them with black scaled tails with flecks of color or light. Some of them had smooth scalps, some of them had hair like their leader. Others had rough cuts that had been removed out of necessity. Some of them had scales that traveled up their entire bodies. One passed us with nothing but the eyes exposed. I could not tell if they had been male or female. Others had finned ears or none at all. There were so many of them. More then I'd ever expected to see in my entire life.        Every single one of them were singing.        Most of them kept clear of the reef, heading out towards open waters in the wake of their leading lady. Some floated around us, seeming just as curious of us as we were of them. None of them got to close, however, as our scouts were keeping a clear line between us that they were not meant to cross.        It took nearly half an hour for the full pod to swim past us.        And from the whole pod, there was one near the very end that caught my eye.        He was smaller then some of the Sirens I'd seen. His skin was the same pale color as the leader's was. His hair was lighter then some of the others and it streamed behind his face as he swam, landing just at his shoulders. His tail was thin and black, more matte then some that I'd seen. It seemed to absorb light where most of the Siren's reflected it. His eyes weren't completely black marbles. They'd been a deep, dark blue with hints of mossy green reflecting from them.        I'd only noticed this Siren because as he'd swam past, he'd spotted me.        And he hadn't looked away.        I'd watched them all coming from the waters with the eyes of my fellow Mers. My gaze had been stuck to a woman with a long black braid of hair and a thin, wiggling tail like an eel, when I'd glanced down to find something else interesting and I'd looked right into his eyes.        It had scared me a little at first, to suddenly be looking into the eyes of a Siren with no warning. I felt like he was looking through me, into my very soul. And whatever it is he'd seen had made him smile at me through his song.        I felt like all the air had been taken from my body as he rose up, swimming steadily past me, his eyes still locked with mine.        Then he'd twisted, angling away from me and breaking the contact he'd made. The voices were suddenly quiet and I watched as he and all the others disappeared into the ocean, leaving us in a heavy silence.        None of us moved or spoke.        Then Maru's voice cut through it like a dagger.        "Alright, you've seen the show! Back to your lives now, go on!"        She swam through the crowd, whacking people with the tip of her fins as calling names of those that seemed locked in the trance of the Sirens song. Eventually, she came down to me, as I was the only one left near the bottom of the pack. The others had swam up to the surface to talk about what had happened and what they'd seen. I was still floating still in the water, staring off at where I'd last seen the Siren.        "Hannah?"        I turned, trying not to flinch at the sound of her voice.        "Yes, Maru?" I asked, my own voice quiet.        "What did you think of them?" She asked, swimming past me to gaze off into the blue.        "I... they were beautiful... terrifying... strange... and beautiful." She looked back at me, her brow furrowed and her lips pulled down into a frown. "Their song was like nothing I've ever heard. Our songs aren't like that."        "Aye... because their song is magical. It doesn't work on us as it works on humans, but it can still have an effect... how did it make you feel?"        "Um... amazed? That a song could sound like that."        "Seems like you're less easily taken by their magic. That's good. It will keep you safe when they return after their hunt."        "When will they be back?" I tried to keep the urgency out of my voice, but I desperately wanted to see that Siren again. Talk to him, if I could.        "A few months time. When it gets to cold for the fishermen to be out so often." She turned away from me, looking back out into the water. I could just barely see the side of her face from here. I could see her brows move together and I saw her chew on her bottom lip. Something she did when she was worried. When she turned back to me, however, she held the same stoic mask as always. "Well, the rest of the day is yours. I hope you make the most of it."        After that, she propelled herself up through the water, pausing to talk with one of the scouts that was still patrolling the side of the reef.        I stayed there for a while longer before turning away and heading back up towards the reef.        Hopefully my rock was still unoccupied.

       It had been nearly a week since the Sirens had passed our pod and still that one boy was on my mind.

       His eyes had been so deep. So amazingly beautiful. I felt like I could get lost in them if I looked long enough. And I wasn't sure if I'd ever want to come back out.

       Maybe I wasn't as safe against their magic as Maru had thought.

       Had he cast some sort of spell on me? Keeping him in my thoughts at all hours? Or was I truly just that enamored with some strange Siren that had simply made prolonged eye contact with me? Sure, I wasn't considered the pick of the pod among our generation. I'd yet to experience any kind of romance from any of the other Mers in our troupe, but did I really want something so bad that I'd be interested in a Siren?

       He had been amazingly beautiful... like a shadow in the water. His voice had echoed through my mind during the night, lulling me to sleep with the very memory of it. I wondered if he was that enchanting when he simply spoke...

       I shook myself, turning to look up at the sky as I floated over the reef.

       I needed to get him out of my head somehow.

       But how?

       A month had passed.

       I was swimming along the reef slowly, letting myself lazily twist between the coral and the rocks. Fish fluttered around my tail, nipping off what little morsels they could find among my scales. I was humming softly to myself. It was the Sirens song, what little of it I could remember.

       I had yet to get that boy out of my head.

       Maru had seemed to notice, as I'd been singing this song to myself whenever I thought no one was listening. She'd pulled me aside earlier today, asking me if I was still focusing on the Sirens visit. I'd lied to her, told her that I hadn't even realized that I was singing it and that it must just be a side effect of their spell. I wasn't sure if she'd believed it or not, but she'd left me alone afterward.

       I sighed to myself as I finished the final note.

       What would he be doing right now?

       Maybe swimming under the belly of a ship. Tugging at the nets that carried in fish. Maybe he had a sailor in his claws and was dragging him down into the water to feast. I'd tried to put horrible images of him tearing a human apart in my head, but every time my thoughts were overpowered by those eyes and I'd lost track of whatever I was doing. The blood vanished into the water and I'd just be staring into those endless pools of blueish green, completely at their mercy.

       Would he have mercy on me? I'd heard a few tails of starving Sirens ripping into Mers that strayed to far from their reefs and their pods, but that had been when I was a child. To keep me from trying to escape to see them earlier in my life, as I'd done many times. Were they real? If I was weaker to his song, would he lure me out into the blue and devour me?

       Would I even bother to try and stop him?

       I sighed again, pushing my way through a school of fish and tilting down as I reached the drop off. In the distance, I saw Reus, swimming slowly back and forth near the surface of the water, the fin on his spine leaving ripples against the waves.

       Alli gave me a wave as I passed her family's cave and I returned it halfheartedly, propelling myself down to the shelf I'd claimed in my adulthood. Mine was lower down the cliff then most others, as I liked my solitude. It was probably one of the reasons most of the other Mers didn't try to befriend me.

       I looked up into the waves, seeing the glowing face of the full moon streaming light down from the sky. Then, I let myself rest upon the rock and I curled into myself, crossing my arms under my chin and closing my eyes.

       Gently, I hummed the song again to myself, steadily drifting off to sleep.

       I jerked awake, nearly falling off my shelf as I did.

       The water around me was dark. The moon had fallen to low in the sky to cast light down towards the bottom of the cliff.

       Silence seemed to suffocate me, pressing in on all sides as I slowly slipped off my shelf and looked up towards the rest of my pod. Nothing moved in the darkness. Not a single other Mer was awake.

       Then why was I?

       I moved a few feet out into the water, stretching my arms above my head and shaking my hair away from my face. I looked out into the vast darkness of the ocean and breathed out heavily, making a plan to go back to my shelf and let sleep take me once again. With a nod to myself, I turned back to my little hole, heading back over to it.

       Something suddenly stopped me.

       It was a voice.

       Not Maru. Not Reus or Alli.

       It was a song.

       A Siren's Song.

       I spun around, my eyes wide as I looked back into the darkness.

       It was a single voice. Distant and smooth. And there, in the shadows, I could see something moving. Something swimming towards me.

       My tail twitched and I looked up towards the top of the cliff, to the reef. I didn't see a scout or anything. Nothing was moving up there. Maybe it would be safe... I'd never know if I didn't take the chance.

       I looked back into the darkness, to the sleek, pail figure that was slowly shifting closer and I swam forward.

       I could already see from here that it was him. He was slowing down as he got closer, either not expecting me, or not wanting to get any closer to the pod then he had to. I didn't slow down, so I was right in front of him after just a few seconds. Up close, I could see that he was only slightly smaller then I was.

       The song he was humming fell silent as we just looked at each other.

       I kept my head down and held my hands up at my chest, trying to keep them from shaking. I didn't know why I was so nervous. Maybe I was afraid of him...?

       He smiled at me and I felt my heart start to race.

       "I was hoping my song would reach you," He said softly, turning to float on his back. He started to swim a lazy circle around me and I followed him with my eyes, not wanting to loose sight of him in case this was just a dream. It certainly felt like it was to good to be true.

       I opened my mouth, trying to think of something to say, but as he came around my side again, I lost my courage.

       His eyes met mine once again and his smile widened when I looked away, trying to hide my very obvious blush.

       He suddenly slid close to me, raising a hand to touch my face. He was nearly an inch from my cheek when I noticed that he had claws. They were black and curled sharply at the end. Probably good for hooking into skin and dragging someone out of a boat...

       I flinched when he touched me, but I still couldn't tell if it was fear or not. His hand gently cupped my cheek, his claws ever so slightly running against my skin. I felt my face get warmer as I dared to look up into his eyes again. His smile once again widened, which I would have thought impossible if he hadn't been a Siren. This time, though, his lips parted and I could see two rows of impossibly sharp teeth shinning at me. My eyes widened and this time I knew it was fear that sparked in my veins.

       What was I doing?!

       I was out in the open water with a Siren! His claws on my face, his teeth closer then they ever should be! I wanted to pull away. To turn and swim for safety.

       But I didn't.

       I had no idea why I didn't.

       "What's your name?" He asked softly, running his thumb across my jaw as he pulled his hand away from my face.

       "Hannah," I whispered, pushing down the strange emotions I felt when he'd stopped touching me. "What is yours?"

       "Fotios," He replied, swimming a few feet away from me. It didn't seem like he was trying to lure me out farther from the pod, but I did have a strong urge to move with him, farther out into the water.

       I managed to fight it, however, and kept myself where I was, letting my eyes follow him.

       "That's a strange name," I said softly, finally finding my voice.

       "Maybe to a Mer. For a Siren, its rather common." He did a flip in the water, tilting backwards before propelling himself forward, back to where he'd been in the beginning of our meeting. "I'm truly surprised you came out here. Most of your kind wouldn't dare trust a Siren. Certainly not one singing to you in the dead of night."

       "What makes you think I trust you?" I asked, a playful tone in my voice.

       His eyes widened a bit, both of his brows raising as he leaned back in surprise. Then he leaned forward, closer then he'd been before. I had to fight the urge to lean either away or even closer.

       "Then why are you here, little morsel?" His voice had become a low whisper. The rumble of his voice washed over me in the darkness and I suddenly felt very cold at the nickname he'd given me. "Why answer my song with your presence? Why not stop me from touching you? I'm sure you know very well that my kind will eat yours if given the opportunity, so why haven't you run back to your reef?" He tilted his head at me, his smile suddenly vanishing. "Why aren't you afraid?"

       That... was a very good question...

       Why wasn't I afraid?

       I'd honestly just assumed that he'd put me under a spell or something. But if he wanted to know, then that probably wasn't the case.

       "I don't know," I said softly.

       He leaned away from me again, his head tilting to the other side as he did so. His eyes flickered across my face, then suddenly over my shoulder. His eyes widened and he suddenly grabbed both sides of my face with his hands, his claws just barely digging into my cheeks.

       Before I could do anything to try and pull away or stop him, he pulled me forward and pressed his lips to mine.

       It only lasted a few seconds before he pulled away and moved to my ear, where he whispered, "I'll come back for you," then pushed me back as he turned and vanished into the wall of shadow that the sea was at night.

       Moments later, a strong hand wrapped around my arm and I was pulled back as I turned to spot Reus, a coral dagger in his hand and murder in his eyes. I'd never seen him look so angry in my life.

       Of course, once half the pod was woken by him angrily yelling at me, Maru pulled us up by the reef for an explanation. Reus gave her one. I stared down at the sand, more shocked then ashamed, as I probably should have been.

       Maru had looked at me with wide, fearful eyes when he'd told her what I'd been doing. That I'd been in open water, alone, with a Siren.

       Thankfully, Reus hadn't seen that he'd kissed me. He just said that he saw Fotios pull me forward, then push me away. After that, Maru gave me a lecture that lasted until the sun rose. Then she sent me back to my shelf, telling Reus to stay beside me until the Sirens went back down to the deep sea.

       "Apparently, she can't be trusted to be smart," had been her exact words.

       Two more months passed with Reus acting as my chaperone.

       The fishing season was starting to end. The water at the surface was very slowly getting colder. People were whispering that the Sirens would be back any day now, and of course everyone knew of my midnight rendezvous with one. There wasn't a single thing that stayed secret in this pod.

       It was noon when a scout returned.

       He'd heard them coming.

       Everyone was called back from the water and told to stay at the drop off. The same group of young Mer gathered from before. I was instructed to stay on my home shelf, in the back, away from the Sirens. Reus was beside me, his gaze piercing the big blue as the song began to echo around us.

       I raised my head as they approached.  Since my shelf was so low, I still had a good view of them.

       It started the same as it had before. The voices slipped through the water, encasing the drop off in a strange, haunting melody. The woman in the lead swam towards us, noticeably curvier then she had been before. Her voice led the chorus and she tilted forward when she got close, swimming straight down into the darkness below us. A few moments later, a cloud of Sirens joined her, all of them fuller and fatter then they had been before.

       If I hadn't been so preoccupied looking for a very specific Siren, I'd probably have felt bad about what that meant for the people on land.

       As before, he was near the back of the pack.

       Every shape and size of Siren passed us by without a care in the world. Then he came near the end, once again locking my gaze with his as soon as he spotted me. At first, he was smiling.

       Then he seemed to notice my body guard and his grin faltered.

       He slowed his swimming at first, his eyes rolling over the many scouts that our pod had. It almost seemed like he was sizing them up. Then he sighed and continued on with his brothers and sisters, dipping down into the water to head down to the depths.

       My heart ached at the sight and I had to press my mouth and nose against my arms to keep my lips from quivering. I wanted so badly to cry, but I couldn't do it here, while everyone was watching. Reus gazed at me from the corner of his eye. I noticed him frowning, but I didn't make eye contact. It would just be good to be left alone once this was over.

       And very soon, it was. They vanished back into the shadows and their song faded from my ears and all at once, they were gone.

       Fotios was gone.

       Not to be back until the next year. The next summer.

       By then, I'd be lucky to have forgotten about him and for him to forget about me. I'm sure that this would happen again when they came back. Maru would put Reus at my side and tell him to stay and I'd have no freedom once again.

       Speaking of...

       Maru came through the group again, as she'd done the last time, telling them the spectacle was over and that it was time to return to their lives. She came down in front of me, nodding for Reus to leave, which he did.

       "It was for your own good, Hannah. He wouldn't have done anything for you but hurt you."

       Instead of responding, I pushed myself out of my shelf and swam along it, away from the pod, slowly angling myself up so I could go to the reef.

       She didn't follow me.

       It had been nearly two weeks since the Sirens left. I'd returned to my daily activities of swimming over the reef by myself and ignoring the rest of the pod. My romp with the Siren fell out of people's minds as they found new gossip to focus on. This time it was the question of who the father to Gilly's new baby was. Varus was claiming it, but she was betrothed to Yorrin.

       I didn't care.

       The first few days after Fotios had gone back to the ocean floor had been the worst of them. I didn't know why I'd gotten so attached over a single kiss and a hollow promise, but I had and I spent the days crying to myself, either dramatically draped across my rock, or silently to myself as I tried to sleep.

       Once I'd ran out of tears, I made a show of ignoring Maru and Reus, which I was still doing. That was simply pay back for stripping me of my freedom for so long. Something they deserved, in my mind.

       They had just been trying to protect me, sure. But I didn't care about that either.

       Was it childish? Yes. Was it petty? Yes. Was that going to make me stop? No.

       For the last few days, I considered simply leaving.

       It wasn't like that was against the rules. Mers came and went all the time. It was entirely common to find a single stray along the reef or the drop off. Sometimes they even came out of the open waters. And perhaps, if I left, Maru would reconsider doing it in the future, to some other young Mer that was unfortunate enough to become attached to something like a Siren.

       Although the idea was tempting, I'd never left my pod before. I'd been born and raised in these caves.. My mother had died in those open waters. My father vanished at the edge of this very drop off.

       If I left it? Where would I go? What would I do? Would I even survive?

       Those questions where what kept me awake in the night.

       I was laying on my shelf, staring up at the rocky ceiling, considering the options and preparing to make my choice... When I realized that I could once again hear a single voice singing to me through the water.

       A single, smooth, distance voice, calling to me from the water below me.

       I rolled onto my stomach, leaning over my ledge to stare with wide, hopeful eyes down into the darkness. The singing wasn't getting louder and I couldn't see him, but I knew that it was him. I knew that it was Fotios. He was singing to me.

       Calling to me.

       Beckoning me.

       Was it a spell? Maybe. A trick to kill and eat me? Perhaps.

       But I didn't care.

       I didn't even bother to check for the night patrol.

       I pushed myself off the shelf and propelled myself down into the water, straight down into the deep, looking for Fotios.

       The singing got louder the deeper I got. His voice got closer. I felt the water pressing into me. I noticed the light leaving the water around me. It was cold down here. But I didn't stop. I was blind down here in the water. When I turned and looked up, I saw nothing. Yet, I kept going. His song was so loud now. I knew he was close. That I was close!

       When it stopped, I did to.

       I heard something else in the water. The sound of someone swimming.

       "Fotios?" I called quietly. It felt wrong to talk here. It was so silent without his song. I hadn't realized just how much sound the waves made when you were near the surface.

       "Told you I'd come back for you, little morsel." His voice made me jerk in surprise. He sounded much closer then I'd expected him to be.

       I jumped again with surprise when his hand grabbed my wrist.

       "Calm down, I'm just letting you know where I am."

       "I can't see anything."

       "That's cause you aren't built for the darkness down here. And this isn't even that deep. Its much darker down on the floor." Before I could ask how it could possibly get darker, he let go of my wrist and something suddenly lit up behind me.

       I turned, my eyes wide as they rested upon Fotios.

       He was glowing!

       The scales along his tale lit up down the side of it, glowing a soft blue. It wrapped up along his sides as well, before trailing up his spine and up the sides of his neck, ending along his eyes, which were like two bright circles of blue, looking at me through the darkness. He had a dusting of smaller specks of light along his shoulders and chest.

       My eyes followed the light along his body and I was nearly hypnotized by the beauty of it.

       "Come on now, morsel, don't get all dreamy-eyed on me now."

       I laughed at that, which made him raise his brows at me.

       "How could I not? Look at you! You're... you..."

       "Glow. I know. All Sirens do, we just don't need to so close to the surface, so not many people know about it. Certainly not many Mers."

       I couldn't stop myself from reaching forward. He didn't stop me, but his eyes were watching my hand as I reached for him. I touched his shoulder, running my fingers very lightly across the parts of him that lit up. It felt no different then the rest of his skin. I followed the trail with my fingers, softly tracing it up his neck.

       His body shuttered suddenly and he reached up, pulling my hand away from his skin with a cocky smile.

       "Easy there, little morsel."

       "Sorry, I just... Its so... beautiful."

       He raised a single brow at me as he softened his grip on my hand.

       "What do you know about Sirens?" He asked suddenly.

       I took a moment to think about it.

       "Not much, honestly. I know that you all live in the deepest waters you can. Your like Mers, but with muted colors and more interesting details. You can only eat meat and... usually you choose to eat humans, but can eat anything if you're hungry enough. You only come up from the deep once a year, during the summer, when the fishermen are most active... I just learned that you all apparently glow. I... don't really know anything else."

       "Do you know how we're made?"

       "I... figured the same way as Mers..."

       He smiled at me again, this time showing his teeth.

       "Not exactly, little morsel." He let go of my hand and swam forward a bit, taking his light with him. I could still see him as clear as the moon, but it was slightly scary, having him farther from me. "I want you to look at me. Tell me what's different them someone like you, besides the glowing." He straightened his tail as he spoke and held out his arms, slowly twisting himself in a circle with his tail fins..

       "Well... your tail is black. I've never seen a Mer with a tail darker then grey or brown. Your tail fins are sharper then most, but still within the realm of possibility for Mers... You have claws. Your teeth are sharp." I looked him over, seeing if I could notice anything else amiss. "That seems to be it... besides that, you could be just a normal Mer."

       He smirked at me and swam closer once again. He took my hand in his and raised it to his hair.

       "What about up close? What do you notice?"

       "Uh... w-well... you're eyes aren't black or white. Most of the other Sirens had totally black or totally white eyes. Yours are blue... a deep, greenish blue. And...," I wrapped some of his hair around my finger and noticed that, while the roots and locks were nearly black, the tips were a very faded orange.

       "Do you want to know how Sirens are made?"

       I looked at him, confused, and nodded.

       "Pure Sirens can have children, the way the Mers do. But the average Siren cant. Because they aren't usually pure. Most Sirens that you saw in our pod were once Mers, like I used to be."

       My eyes widened at that.

       "You... used to be... a Mer?!"

       "Mhm. Sirens are made through magic. If you swim down into the darkness, as far as you can possibly go, you'll eventually run into a Siren. Usually an old one, one that doesn't leave the depths anymore. They can't handle the light from the sun. And they'll offer to make you into one of them. That's what happened to me."

       "How... how do they do it?"

       "Its a song. All Siren magic is channeled through song. They sing to you and from their mouths, with the music, comes light." He took my hand and placed it against his face, letting my fingers play along the light against his temple. "It comes from them and wraps around your body. The light is the first thing you get that marks you as a Siren. From there, you are usually led to a pod, where they teach you how to sing. You'll stay down there for the first few years, until your scales turn black and you won't get mistaken for a Mer anymore. Then they bring you up to teach you how to hunt. The transformation goes differently for everyone. We all look different in the end, as you saw. Mine isn't over yet. I'm sill young."

       "Anyone can become a Siren?" I asked softly.

       He smiled at me again, softer then he had in the past. He nodded.

       "Why doesn't anyone know that?"

       "You're elders do. They keep it from you so that you young, wayward Mers think that the only option you have is to stay with the pod and churn out more children for the next generation."

       I pulled my hand away from his hand and clasped them both against my chest as I thought this through.

       I could become a Siren.

       I could leave the pod and find a new life. In the deep water. With magic and music and... with Fotios.

       Would he even want that?

       "Why... are you telling me this?"

       "Isn't it obvious, little morsel? I want to take you home with me."

       I couldn't help but giggle at that.

       "Well? What do you think? Want to run away with a deep sea monster?" He asked, once again swimming away from me, just far enough that I wanted to follow to keep the light close.

       My smile faltered.

       "There's no going back if I do, is there?"

       "Afraid not."

       I glanced up. I couldn't see the reef or the drop off, but I knew it was there.

       Was I really ready to just... leave it all behind?

       My family? My friends?

       I looked down into the water, to where the Sirens made their home.

       I looked back to Fotios a moment later, who was watching me with an expression I couldn't read.

       "How far down is it?" I asked, smiling at him.  He smiled back at me, one that split his face from ear to ear.  He swam over to me and took both of my hands in his, leaning his face close to mine. His eyes were nearly blinding this close up.

       "They're going to love you... and so am I."  With that, he flipped backwards, taking me with him as he dove down into the depths. I kept pace with him, a smile spreading across my face as I did.

       Fotios suddenly started to sing.

       It wasn't the mournful melody that I'd heard from him before. This was a full, proud song. One that made me shiver with its power and its emotion.

       My smile widened and I let out a laugh, excited for what the future would bring.

[gilbirda]

Guilty (full vers.)

[Read in AO3]

Chloe is scared. She's scared, and she tips the liquid into his wine glass and ruins everything. Some part of her wants to stop. Her hand shakes. She knows she'll regret this, she knows it in her bones. Yet she has no control. She tips the liquid into his wine glass. (Again. And again. And again.)

"Oh," she hears from the elevator. She turns - she thought he'd been in the bedroom - and he looks different, sad and broken-

"No, Detective, no. You don't belong here. You don't belong here at all."

“Lucifer,” she manages to say, breathless. “I’m sorry, I-”

“Chloe,” the intensity of his eyes freezes her hand as she is going to pour the liquid in the wine glass, “this isn’t real.”

“I fucked things up, Lucifer,” she has tears in her eyes. “I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry.”

She only hopes he knows she isn’t only referring to the fact that she did send him to Hell. Or that she had lied to him, countless times. That she had used his feelings for her to strike when he was most vulnerable. She had betrayed him.

She realized it too late, and the guilt literally ate her alive.

Chloe blinks, her hand gripping around the skull vial. She knows she has to stop her hand, stop trying to poison Lucifer, stop killing him -

But she pours it. Again.

The other Lucifer approaches her and grabs her shoulders, shaking her.

“Snap out of it, Detective! You shouldn’t be here.”

“But I do,” she bites her lip, looking down at the full vial in her hand. She pours it in the cup of wine. “I do. I do. I killed you. I’m sorry.”

“Detective, don’t be silly!” he smiles despite the desperate look in his eyes. “I’m immortal. You just… shortened my vacation. I will come back, uh, eventually.”

He grimaces, but it is enough to trigger her again. She pours the poison in the cup, looking away from this other Lucifer. Why isn’t he drinking it? Why isn’t he looking at her like his heart broke as he falls down? She - She stomped it down, that day. She felt it. The moment he stopped breathing was the moment she knew she made the wrong decision.

The next only good choice she made was letting that perp shoot her. It didn’t matter. She had already failed everyone important in her life. Trixie didn’t matter, Dan didn’t matter, life didn’t matter.

She was in Hell, and she deserved it.

--------------------------

Lucifer knew something was wrong the moment his lips came in contact with the wine. The moment his body froze and he couldn’t even lift a finger. He thought that maybe this was yet another uncovered side effect of the Detective’s presence, maybe he was a bit too nervous and his body was acting out (He! Nervous! He was no schoolboy on the first date, for fucks sake!).

Then he saw her tears. The guilt in her eyes, a sight he was too damn used to, telling him without words what he needed to know. Somehow, Chloe had tricked him. He wanted to congratulate her in being smarter than the Devil, smarter than the King of Trickery - but the truth is that everything he could even think about was the feeling on something breaking inside his chest.

As his body fell down to the floor, he felt like he was burning again. Falling, burning. He wanted to chuckle but still couldn’t move - the irony of the situation was too good.

He opened his eyes in front of the Gates of Hell. He brushed his suit as he stood up, adjusted his ring and straightened his back. There was no use in lamenting over what had happened. The Detective made her choice, at last. All this time he wanted her to make an informed choice about him, and she had finally chosen that he wasn’t what she wanted.

She was only human, he couldn’t hold it over her head. She chose humanity.

Lucifer focused on those thoughts as much as he could over the next months, focusing on the riots and getting everything back under control. Once he reminded everyone who was King, he found too much time on his hands. Time to think about her.

He was in the middle of his accustomed afternoon wall-staring contest when he felt her.

Chloe. No - the Detective.

In Hell?

Impossible.

But she was there behind her own door. She was dead and she felt guilty over something. Had she been killed on duty? She couldn’t be in Hell! She was -

Reliving the moment she killed him, it seems. She looked haunted, desperate, with the eyes of every consumed soul that inhabited his realm. Her soul was his, she had been damned. Because of him, it seems.

"No, Detective, no. You don't belong here. You don't belong here at all."

--------------------------

Dragging her away from the door proved more difficult than expected. The damn woman was stubborn like no other, and her determination to go back inside was admirable. In any other situation, he would have told her how much he loved-

No. That was in the past.

Focus, Lucifer. Get the Detective out of Hell was the priority.

Once in the dark hallways of Hell, he slammed the damn door close and forced it to disappear. It worked like a charm, because it was then that Chloe blinked the daze away and really looked at him.

"Why?"

He couldn't understand. Why was she in Hell? Why was he bothering her once again?

"Why did you save me? I…"

"You don't belong here, Detective," he repeated, forcing his hands away from her shoulders. "I'll get you out of here in a yiffy and take you to the Silver City where you-"

"No."

"No?"

"I belong here," her eyes watered. She pushed her body away from his until her back clashed with the hard wall. "I'm not a saint."

"Detective, one little mistake won't erase all the good you have done," he frowned. "Think about all the criminals you've put behind bars. Think about all the innocents you saved."

"But I killed you," she let her body slide down the wall, not minding the ashes. "I betrayed your trust. I actually believed that you were-"

"The Devil?" He chuckled softly. "Because, darling, I think it is too late to deny it."

"Evil." She corrected him, shaking her head. "I thought you were what people think you are," she braved a glance to his standing form. "Father Kinley, he…" she gulped. "In Rome, he showed me things about you, stuff you have done… I actually believed that you were evil for a moment. And then, I… I did something horrible -"

She put her head in her hands, sobbing. He had never seen the Detective so lost, so broken and vulnerable. Killing him really did a number on her.

Lucifer took a step back and breathed, trying to assess the situation.

Chloe was dead. And damned. It was too late to bring her back to Earth, also. The only place he could take her was Heaven, and he'd do it gladly even if he was angry with her. And hurt. But in the time he had to himself in Hell he decided that it didn't matter anymore; that Chloe's decision had brought a closure he didn't know he needed. He had been rejected and that's it.

Of course, it was easier when he thought he would never see her again.

"Chloe," he called her with some command in his voice. "Stand up."

She did so, tears going down her cheeks.

"Come with me," the Devil extended a hand. "Let's get you somewhere safe and we'll talk."

The woman took his hand without saying anything else, a distant look in her eyes.

--------------------------

Chloe knew she didn't deserve any of this. His hospitality, his worry, his words. She had killed him. Not "tried to", but actually do the deed.

No. Scratch that. She knew he loved her and exploited that vulnerability to destroy him.

It didn't matter that, at least in appearance, Lucifer was the same. Alive. She had killed him on Earthly grounds and she felt horrible about it.

Even now, after having a quick shower and changed clothes, she felt dirty and undeserving. Guilty. Could he see that in her soul? Did he know how she died? She realized that she had no idea what he could do as the Devil. She didn't know him at all. She felt stupid for thinking otherwise.

Because as Lucifer walked her through his rooms in the castle, saying that this was the only place they wouldn't be disturbed by demons, Chloe felt like she was light years away from him.

"I'm sorry," she started when they sat down. "There's nothing I want most than going back in time and undo what I did. Or don't listen to Father Kinley. Or don't leave LA."

"The past is in the past, Detective," he made a gesture with his hand, brushing her worries away.

"No it's not!"

He blinked slowly. "It is. I have accepted it. You should do it, too."

"I can't," she sobbed without tears. "I should have realized how wrong it was, but I didn't and-"

"Detective."

"-a-and you died!"

"Detective, listen."

"It is all my fault. I was horribly wrong about you and I should have believed in the man I knew-!"

"Chloe!" He stood up, angry at her ignoring him. While it was nice to know she was repentant, he wasn't sure if he wanted to see her so broken. The woman flinched in her seat, but looked up at him. "Listen to me. It's okay. I'm not dead, nothing that mortal excuse of a priest could have done to really harm me, and I'm not angry with you."

She blinked slowly.

"But I broke your heart." Her voice was soft, unsure. Had she read him wrong?

It was Lucifer's turn to flinch. "It doesn't matter anymore. You made your choice, and you don't deserve to burn in Hell for it."

He really believed that, she thought, because Lucifer didn't lie.

"But I made the wrong choice," she stood up and craned her neck to look at him. "I let my fear cloud my judgement. And I'm sorry."

They held each other's gaze in defiant silence. Lucifer was the first to break form. "Apology accepted." The Devil smiled softly.

For the first time since she set a foot in Hell, Chloe felt hope.

--------------------------

Lucifer sat on his throne, wondering what to do now.

After a hasty escape and a promise to talk more later, he hid in his throne room to show his subjects some kind of normalcy. News of a escaped soul could undermine his peace and quiet; and he had to maintain a strong front and figure, for now.

Chloe had gone to sleep when he left her in his rooms. She didn’t seem to have the energy to do anything else, so he let her even if being a damned soul she didn’t need to.

What now? He could take her to Heaven, force his way in and somehow convince his siblings that she was deserving of Paradise. Even if the Detective herself felt undeserving, he was completely sure she should not spend the rest of eternity here with him.

The idea brought a slight chuckle to his lips. How much he would have given in the past to spend eternity by her side! It could sound like a dream come true - if he didn’t feel like an elephant was sleeping on his chest everytime her mere name was whispered in his mind.

This is ridiculous, he thought. He had gotten over the heartbreak, he had enough time to accept her rejection, he had to! She may be sorry for killing him, but that didn’t mean she loved him back or that she wasn’t scared of him. Nothing of this absurd situation changed how things are.

Chloe.

Non-existent wind brought her name to his ears. His mind was filled with memories of his short time by her side, his dream that almost came true; his own silent torture to deal with until the end of times. Because he still loved her more than anything and nothing had changed.

--------------------------

Lucifer squared up and knocked on his bedroom door, swallowing down the tumultuous feelings that consumed him at the thought of Chloe. Shaking his head, he reminded himself once more that no, loving her didn’t mean he had to hope for a future with her anymore.

“Detective?” he whispered, opening the door.

She was sitting in front of a window, watching the ash fall down slowly. Shoulders slumped, defeated, she was still a shadow of the woman he falled for. Something in his chest hurt.

“Detective, I’m taking you to the Silver City.”

“No.”

Lucifer took a breath. “Come.”

“I don’t deserve Heaven, Lucifer.” He forced down the shiver caused by hearing his name coming from her lips. She refused to turn around and look at him. “You can’t take me there.”

“Actually my dear, I can.”

Ignoring her protests, he scooped her body up from her seat, unfurled his wings and looked up to the ceiling. She had to go, she had to leave Hell.

With a powerful stroke, he was standing in front of the Pearly Gates with a very distressed woman in his arms screaming his name. People waiting in line to enter Heaven looked at the Lord of Hell and the wailing soul like they were crazy. He ignored them all.

“Chloe, look at me,” he placed her down on her feet. She did as he told, gazing up at him with her impossible blue eyes. “It will get better. I promise.” Lucifer smirked as he leaned down to kiss her forehead. “My siblings will take care of you.”

He noticed the approaching form of another angel, sword in hand, and pushed her towards them.

“Lucifer, don’t -”

But her words reached nothing. He wasn’t there anymore.

--------------------------

A misplaced soul, they considered her. It wasn’t uncommon, the angel that found her said, for a soul to feel unnecessary guilty and land in Hell when they didn’t have to. She had nothing to fear, they would amend the mistake as soon as possible.

She found a place to stay in Heaven; and after a boring welcome speech, she was introduced to her neighbours and companions of district.

Chloe ate with them, shared stories and told them how she ended up in Hell and how it was (a very watered down version of the story), unbothered by the fact that she knew the Devil himself. The part where she felt guilty for killing him usually made her audience scatter.

She didn’t care. She wasn’t going to stay here for long, she was sure. Someone out there would find out that she was undeserving of Heaven and would throw her downstairs again.

The woman waited what felt like weeks, but as no one came to fetch her she decided to venture out herself.

Everything was too bright and cheery; too shiny, too pretty, without fault. It sickened her. Nothing existed without fault. There wasn’t such thing as perfect garden or perfect frozen yogurt or perfect house. She had been a cop, she was used to humanity’s imperfection; to the horror hidden behind perfect faces.

To betraying a man that loved her.

Her wandering feet took her towards another part of the city, somewhere with angels flying around and ignoring her. As she walked and walked, the density of angels augmented; until she couldn’t make a step without almost bumping into one of them.

She ignored them all - they weren’t stopping her or taking her back to Hell.

Chloe stopped in front of the only locked door in Heaven. Smirking, she knocked. If Lucifer wasn’t going to listen to her, then his Father could be a better bet.

--------------------------

Lucifer convinced himself once more that it was the best choice, sending Chloe to Heaven. She didn’t deserve Hell and nothing he could do would have convinced her of her innocence. Now he had an eternity to forget her, this time for real. Not worrying about her dying or if she would end up in the wrong place anymore.

As he sat in front of the Lake of Fire, he wondered what she could be doing right now - was she happy up there? Reuniting with her dad? She always talked so fondly of him, about how he was an important part of her decision of being a Detective. If Lucifer could go to the Silver City he would definitely thank that man for it - he doubted he would have ever met Chloe otherwise.

Pathetic. He was being pathetic. If Maze was there she would tell him the same thing. One look at her and all these… feelings came back. Stupid. Absurd. Useless-

A noise from above interrupted his thoughts. It was like the sky was breaking into pieces, bolts of lightning casting shadows on the innumerable spikes and walls around his domain.

What was going on?

His eyes went to the ball of fire going down at high speed, and his heart stopped for a moment.

It couldn’t be.

How?

Which one of his stupid siblings had decided to pull a ‘him’ and fuck up in Heaven so much to be send here?

For a moment he considered ignore it and keep sulking and brooding around the Lake, but a nagging curiosity pulled him to his feet. Lucifer groaned, walking in wide strides towards the place he presumed the ball of fire would land, not very far from him. He wondered for a moment what he would say to them. A laugh at their expense was in order. Oh how the tables turned!

He adjusted his suit and walked around the last tower, prepared to meet his new roommate, a grin already prepared and in place.

What he found there, badly burned and smoking, he wished it was one of his siblings.

--------------------------

She fell for what felt days. Who knew that Heaven and Hell were to far apart? Maybe it was her mortal body, unprepared for such a journey, that was perceiving a passing of time warped and unrealistic.

The thing is, she was plummeting down and down and down. Towards Hell. Towards Lucifer.

He couldn’t send her back to Heaven anymore, she thought with a chuckle, ignoring the burning in her skin. Screaming at God and ask ‘why’ maybe was out of line. No, well. What was out of line was breaking down his door and threaten Him with a sword (the things weighed a ton, let me tell you), demanding to be sent to Hell.

When He asked why, all she wanted was to wipe that stupid smile off His face. Why no one understood that she deserved to be punished? She couldn’t be here, enjoying paradise. She failed her best friend and let fear cloud her judgement - she killed him!

Armored angels - archangels, she was informed later - arrived in record time, subduing her and forcing her to drop the sword. For a moment it was weird being at this side of justice, earning a nervous giggle she totally didn’t think was of a madwoman.

The worst part? God told her it was ‘all part of a plan’. She wanted to burn the place down. How could any of this be part of any plan? She was a monster! She killed an innocent man. The angel at her side scoffed, murmuring something about Lucifer not being innocent. Chloe bit him.

This was a waste of time. Everything was pointless.

She spat at His face, declaring that if He loved his son He would send her back to Hell to be punished for what she did. That what a stupid plan it was if Lucifer suffered in it. That he was a manipulative bastard.

Chloe took advantage of the paralyzed outrage of the archangels around her to get free, run towards God and slap Him. “That’s for doing nothing while your son is blamed for humanity’s sins.”

Looking back at it now, falling through layers of reality, maybe it wasn’t such a good idea. Once she reached the bottom it was going to hurt.

The woman closed her eyes when the familiar ash clouds parted to show her an upside down view of Hell, knowing that the end was near. At least the burning would stop.

She hit the ground hard, the air forced out of her lungs in a big ‘oof’.

--------------------------

“Chloe?” his voice trembled, weak with the knowledge that it was her and no other soul at the bottom of the newly formed crater.

Lucifer blinked back tears as he got near, looking down at the smoking body looking back at him. Chloe smiled weakly.

“Hey Lucifer. I’m back.”

He would have laughed if the situation was different.

“How?”

“I Fell.”

He snorted. “Mortals don’t ‘Fall’ from Heaven.”

“I did,” she chuckled as she tried to move. “Ouch. Anyway, it seems all it took was threaten God with bodily harm.”

“You talked with Dad?”

“Yes, and it was utterly useless,” she rolled her eyes, taking a deep breath to overcome the pain and sit back up. “The thing is I’m back here.”

“Why? Why reject eternal paradise?”

“Because I don’t deserve paradise.”

“Chloe, what you did was -”

“Lucifer, what I did was more than a mistake. I betrayed you. I threw all I knew about you out of the window, believing that you were as evil as people say you are. I made me forget that I loved you.” She sighed. She have had enough time to reflect on what she would tell Lucifer once she saw him again. He had forgiven her, but he still didn’t know her feelings for him. It was enough of this game.

She’ve had time to feel like herself again back in Heaven, calm down and go past the stage of “I’m guilty, I need to be punished”. Lucifer had accepted her apology, now she had to work on gaining back his trust. That is, if he still loved her.

She was prepared to be rejected if it wasn’t the case. He had the right to, after all. It would hurt but she was an adult and she could face it.

“Detective?”

“Help me up, please?” she ignored his bewildered look and extended a hand. “I think we need to talk.”

--------------------------

Back in his bedroom she felt like another completely different person, Lucifer thought.

And now they were looking at each other, waiting for the other to start.

“I-”

“Sorry -”

She chuckled at the awkwardness. “You first.”

“Yes, well. Hm,” he cleared his throat. “I was going to apologize.”

“What for?”

He made a gesture towards her burnt clothes and ash-covered body, like it was enough argument.

“It was my own decision, you know.”

“But you are not in your right mind, Detective.” Why wasn’t she seeing it? If she felt guilty for killing him it was a bad reason to base any love. Not that he expected her to truly love him after all this.

Chloe pursed her lips, like he had just said something specially stupid or out of line, and she was trying to think something else to say than what she was thinking.

“Lucifer,” she started after a few minutes of staring at him. “My head had never been clearer. I had enough time to get past the guilt and the worry. I’m just tired now. Of waiting. Of second guessing.”

The Devil blinked slowly. “And what does that mean?”

“It means,” she took a step closer to him and carefully put a hand on his cheek, “that even if I know that what we had has been irreparably damaged by my betrayal, I want to try again. Start all over.”

“How can you expect of me to act like nothing happened?” his voice was barely above a whisper, his eyes fixed on her. If he didn’t know any better, he almost saw hellfire burning inside the blue.

“No. Not like nothing happened. A lot have happened - starting with me dying,” he flinched at her words. “Sorry, but it is the truth. I won’t be going anywhere. If you want me, that is.”

Lucifer held her gaze, not even blinking. He watched her resolution crumble under his silence, the fingers on his skin tensing with aborted movements of withdrawal.

“If you don’t, I can find a way to be out of your sight,” Chloe was trying to be brave, but both knew she had very few places to go to apart from his palace in Hell.

He chuckled. It was absurd to think that he wouldn’t want her around anymore; that he didn’t want to get back to what they had before. He would give up his throne to go back in time and never show her his Devil face, to confess before the Cain debacle, to show her his wings when he got them back. But he knew that time only moved forward and it was impossible for things to be as they were before.

Still, he felt hope. He put a hand on hers before she could take it back and smiled softly. “Of course I want you around, Detective. I wouldn’t want you anywhere else.” Chloe smiled back. “Well, I can think a few other places I’d be delighted to have you, but you might want to stretch before.”

The tension was broken and she laughed; and, for a moment, it felt like a new hellish version of ‘before’.

--------------------------

Chloe was glad that Lucifer never tried to label what they were and just let things flow. He never pushed her towards compromise or acting in a special way around him. In fact, he encouraged her to work on whatever she desired to pass the time in Hell, including following him in his devilish affairs.

Another thing she noticed was how he never initiated contact, but was open to whatever she wanted. She could invade his personal space as much as she wanted, in private or in public, never talking about boundaries when imparting orders and justice to his demons. Still, she had been on her best behaviour, being happy with just a bit of hand holding.

Now, as she sat on his lap while a beast-looking demon spoke with him in their language, she was content with feeling the deep rumble of his voice vibrating in his chest, lulling her to sleep even in front of a dangerous looking horde of demons. Not once they made a comment about her presence, but she could feel their eyes on her.

Not that she cared about them, though.

“Darling,” she was awoken by his voice, making her jump. She had fallen asleep and now the throne room was empty. She didn’t need to sleep anymore (being dead and all that), but sometimes she liked to nap for a bit. Specially in his arms, but he didn’t have to know that just yet. “I have a bit of free time. Fancy a walk?”

She rubbed her eyes and nodded, yawning. When she opened her eyes she found his dark chocolate watching her fondly. Something told her he enjoyed her little naps on him, too.

--------------------------

Lucifer could almost imagine they were somewhere nice, walking hand in hand in a park with plenty of flowers and a lot of couples doing the exact same thing as them. Maybe a buy an ice-cream and share it, sit under a tree and get a few laughs until they kissed -

Or maybe he had watched enough rom-coms to conjure his own version of things.

Because the nicest place he has to show her was the Lake of Fire where he first landed in Hell, and only because it somewhat resembled the beach where they kissed for the first time. He hoped she thought the same too. Because he did, too much.

At least they were walking with their hands joined, fingers entwined, and Chloe sometimes did a bounce in her step and swung their arms back and forwards a bit. She was quiet, but it has long stopped worrying him - the tiny smile on her lips and steady beating of her heart calmed his racing mind.

“A penny for your thoughts?” he slowed their walking until they arrived at their spot on the volcanic sand in front of the Lake. From there sometimes the lava splashed and did fancy pyrotechnics, which the Detective loved.

“Hm…,” she sat down without letting go of his hand. “I was thinking about Trixie.”

Lucifer tensed. Earth was a common topic of conversation, but the people they knew there was still kind of a sore subject.

“Is okay. I was just wondering how old she might be now and if I’m going to see her again.”

The answers to those questions were easy, but not what she wanted to hear. “Time here moves slowly. She might still be a child by your standards. I don’t even think a year had passed there since you, uh -” her death, another difficult subject. Chloe squeezed his hand and smiled at him.

“Is that so?” she looked back towards the Lake. After a few minutes in companionable silence, she spoke again. “And she will go to Heaven.”

It wasn’t a question. “I’ll make sure of it.” He answered anyway; not needing to add that she wouldn’t see her again if that was the case.

Chloe understood anyway.

The woman scooted closer to him and rested her head in his shoulder. “Hug me. Please?”

Lucifer let go of her hand to do as she requested; and when he kissed the top of her head he was delighted to feel her cuddle closer to his chest, seeking comfort.

--------------------------

She was the first to bring it up.

“Can you go back to Earth?”

Lucifer didn’t tense at her question. Probably because he had been expecting it.

“Yes.” He answered carefully. Chloe tilted her head.

“But I can’t.”

“Not without a freshly deceased body to occupy,” he shivered, thinking about the Abel failure. The woman was already shaking her head.

“Too creepy for me. At least long term.”

“Long term?”

She smiled. “How do you feel about a date upstairs? Borrow a body for a few hours, maybe check on our friends?”

He knew she missed them, but she couldn’t let it consume her. With a frown, he warned her about it. Chloe smiled, hugging him briefly.

“I know, I know. I’m dead and they are not. And when the time comes they will go towards the Pearly Gates and we will never see them again,” when she pulled back her voice was calm, but her eyes weren’t masking any pain. “Is okay. I just want to take a vacation? I’m getting a bit bored here and a little birdie told me you are used to taking vacations from time to time.”

She leaned in to deepen the hug, delighted when his arms reached around her without any prompting from her person.

“If it’s what you desire…”

She shook her head against his chest. “Only if it’s okay with you. I want - I want to do this right, Lucifer. Small steps. Communicate.”

She felt him relax in her arms. This was the main difference from “before”. No more evasion, no more hiding.

--------------------------

Lucifer lost track of time. Had it been a month, a year, a decade? A millenia? His time was measured in the little steps Chloe and him did towards redemption, towards each other. Each new realization, each new experience, was a chapter in the book of his life with her he never knew could end like this.

Somehow things had settled themselves in a comfortable ebb and flow of events. They never defined what they were, because what had transpired between them went beyond anything they knew; but it was fine with them. Their compromise was endless, and their faith in each other grew with every argument and communication effort.

Linda was proud of them, or at least that was she said so once the news of their resurrections stopped freaking her out. Some couples’ therapy sessions and a bottle of scotch helped, that’s true.

No one else but the doctor knew about them lurking in the background, watching them and maybe nudging their paths in this direction or the other. The favour business was extremely helpful for this, something that Chloe was grateful for more than a few times. She even commented that they were their fairy godparents once, to which Lucifer snorted and asked her to wash her mouth before daring say it again.

Eventually, when Trixie was old enough, they paced their Earthly visits more and more. It was a matter of time before everyone they knew died and they made peace with it.

Linda’s company in the palace was a nice surprise, though. Maze was ecstatic either way.

The rest of the humans? Pearly Gates. Would they ever be forgiven and allowed to visit? It was a miracle to be seen, but Chloe still had faith.

Lucifer snorted, making the woman at his side look at him in question. They were at their spot in the beach by the Lake of Fire, waiting for nothing and enjoying peace. Chloe had brought a book that he suspected entailed filthy erotic encounters and epic sword-fighting, but she denied everything when he asked.

“Nothing, dear,” he picked her hand in his to kiss her palm. “Just thinking that I Iove you.”

She rolled her eyes, knowing that while it was true, it wasn’t exactly what he was laughing about. “Whatever you say, babe.”

Lucifer knew it was silly, that they had been together together for a century or so, but he giggled and smiled like an idiot when she called him that.

[kryptored]

A billet-doux to unhappiness - 1

So I don’t know what happened, and this never happened before whenever I posted something using my laptop and then editing or adding something using my phone. But obviously, it removed THE ENTIRE TEXT except for the title and tags. And so, I'm doing this again:

@lady-charinette and @mlangstmonth, on a scale of a hamster’s punch to the moon’s crash landing, how hard did I hit you with this fic? Also tagging @lenoreofraven and @xxxsaltybugxxx because we wouldn’t have ML ANGST MONTH 2019 without their contributions. Never editing something on my phone that I posted with my laptop ever again.

Prompt days: 1 (numb), 2 (self-destruct), 5 (envy), 8 (isolation), 10 (pretend), 14 (choice), 16 (sacrifice), 17 (expectations), 20 (torture), 25 (marks), and 28 (lies).

She didn’t know when it had started, but everyday just seemed like she was always numb to the bones. At first, it felt real: she could feel that she really belonged with them. But as time went by, the affection and attention slowly diminished into nothing but weak appreciation. And what really hurt her the most was that they kept lying to her. They obviously couldn’t lie to themselves because they trusted each other. But they didn’t trust her with anything, not even with their hearts. She was expecting that as a part of their relationship, she would feel loved and special. And yet, she felt lacking and undeserving compared to Adrien and Luka.

Compared to Adrien, she couldn’t light up a room with just a small smile. She couldn’t show others that her eyes were as precious as the rarest stones. She felt that her voice was not made of honey and could whisper all the perfect sweet nothings.

Compared to Luka, she couldn’t soothe a lingering pain with just a hint of a smile. Her eyes were not as piercing and soul-wrenching as his. His voice was like a perfectly harmonized orchestra to everyone’s ears.

Yet here she was, pretending that she was someone who could be likened to these 2 perfect people who were obviously meant for each other. But not for her. She could pretend that all was fine, that she belonged with them. But she was nothing to them and didn’t deserve them.

She kept thinking that them including her in a relationship was nothing but out of pity. They only ever approached and thought of her, because no one would. They may not outright tell her, but she knew what isolation felt like. She was no one special, but they were.

        Sometimes she felt like a ghost watching the two, playing house in their own beautiful world of rapturous romance. Oh, how she envied them so. She could see how they both smiled at each other like they were their worlds (and they are). She could see how their eyes went wide in excitement at the thought and sight of each other. She could tell from the sounds of their voices how they changed into something more lilty. She really deluded herself into thinking that all of that could be applied to her.

        She knew the moment their smiles didn’t reach their eyes. How their voices always carried a dispassionate and distracted tone; she was nowhere near important to pay attention to. It was as if they were trying to keep to themselves, and only themselves, excluding her from any progress in the tales of romance. She knew the moment their affections for her started to fade, and she couldn’t blame them. Who was she to intrude on their blissful relationship? She was nothing but a prickly thorn in their garden of roses. For all she knew, they never really cared for her in the first place.

        She felt as if she had no other choice. She sat at the foot of the bed, staring into space while her mind went wild with self-destructive thoughts. Adrien and Luka were out on a date, and she didn’t push the pair too much when she saw them subtly flinch at her request to keep them company. She knew she would only ruin the moment. That, or she would end up crying and dying inside again as she watched their backs.

There she was, contemplating what to do.

Would she stay? Or would she leave?

It only took her a few moments to decide that it was time for her to do the right thing. To be selfless for once and not drag other people into her internal misery.

And so, she left.

She packed all of her essentials and other effects and left. The process was easy enough. She had been slowly moving her things from Adrien and Luka’s bedroom long before she made her choice, and they were none the wiser. It was still quite hard on her to think about, since they mostly preferred to stay together in bed. Without her. they’d tell excuses of being too tired, too cramped, or “I think he needs me more right now.” It was okay, though. She understood. She knew when she wasn’t needed, and now she was finally going to do them a favour.

She left with all her belongings and didn’t wait for them. She wrote a short note with a presumption that it would probably even take them a long time to notice the note, let alone her absence. After all, they’d gotten used to forgetting about her.

I trust that you’ll only be happy with each other. I’m sorry I wasn’t good enough.

In the dark, a faint glow pulsed weakly.

[kezikatescribbling]

Witness to Monsters- Chapter 2: Smile and Nod

Heeyyy, it’s chapter 2! And it took less than a month! It’s a miracle! I’m kinda sleepy, so not sure how this chapter turned out, but I’m posting it anyway!

***

Chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 |

Or read on AO3:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/21639121/chapters/54362587#workskin

Word count: 2575

TW: Ughhh, nervous behavior? Awkward teasing.

Leon’s POV

Hunnigan wasn’t kidding when she said this girl had been through a lot. Every reaction he’d seen so far spoke of the way [Yn] had been treated since being arrested from the Umbrella facility. The way her eyes widened when she saw his gun, and kept watching it, as if waiting for it to be turned on her. The nervous, defensive look she gave him when she saw the anger on his face, even though his anger wasn’t in any way directed at her, but at the state she was in. And worst of all, the way she flinched when he reached for her, the genuine fear he saw in her eyes...had just about broken his heart. It didn’t matter what she had done while at that lab; this was wrong. He’d relied off of the fear from his enemies to get him through battles, but this was different.

Which is why the last thing he expected was for [Yn] to hug him tighter while pushing her face into him, like she was hiding-like he was protecting her from some unseen predator. He looked down to confirm the movement, and sure enough, her face was burrowed into his shoulder, a chunk of stray hair that had come undone from the low ponytail at the back of her head obscuring part of her face. 

Leon realized he’d been holding his breath, as if the quiet noise would scare [Yn] and ruin the moment. He resumes his even breaths and [Yn] stays with her face hidden until he sits her in the passenger seat of his car. Even then, she doesn’t seem willing to let go of his jacket until he loosens her fingers. As he’s getting into the driver’s seat he notices [Yn] shiver, not a surprise since she’s not even wearing a coat and the chill autumn air is nearing freezing.

“It will get warm in a second,” Leon informs [Yn] as he starts the car and turns the heat up to max, as he does, he feels his phone buzz. Pulling it out reveals a message from Hunnigan with information to get a bag of essentials for [Yn]. A picture goes along with the message to show who Leon is supposed to meet at the bus station. The DSO sure is being careful with this assignment, judging by how clandestine this meeting is supposed to be. ‘Just how desperate is Umbrella to get [Yn] back, and what did she do for them?’ Leon wonders to himself before shaking his head. It doesn’t matter. His job now is to keep her safe.

“It looks like we have a drop to pick up with clothes and supplies for you. Good, you can finally get out of those awful scrubs.” [Yn] looks down at herself as if she didn’t know what she was wearing; green scrubs and a long sleeved shirt underneath, thin socks, and ratty looking gym shoes. The fabric looks rumpled and Leon has to force himself to think of something else besides wondering how long she’s been wearing the same clothes. Leon puts his phone in the hands free holder on the dash and buckles his seatbelt before looking at [Yn] again. She looks thin, but not dangerously so. The way she sits slumped in the seat makes Leon wonder if she’s going to fall back asleep, but her eyes are alert, an awareness that calms some of the worry he’d been carrying since seeing her lying dazed on the cot in her cell. ‘Her cell.’ Leon shoves more dark thoughts from his mind, focusing on what he could do now.

“After when get the drop, how about we pick up something to eat. I’m starving, and I don’t know what kind of bland crackers and water diet you’ve been on, but I’m sure you’re ready for some real food.” Her eyes light up and she gives him a cautious smile that burns it’s way to his soul and takes his breath away. Leon can’t keep the bright answering smile off his face, “I’ll take that as a yes.” For some reason he’s feeling giddy at each positive interaction between them. It hasn’t even been an hour.

Leon focuses his attention on driving to the bus stop, which is about a half hour drive. He spends the trip trying, and failing, to keep his attention off of [Yn], but the way she stares at everything is captivating, and when she flinches from a car zooming past them, Leon reaches across the center console slowly and takes her hand, rubbing small circles into her skin to calm her down. She startles a bit at first, but doesn’t pull away, instead looking from their hands intertwined up to Leon’s face.

“It’s alright. These busy roads can be pretty overwhelming, especially with assholes like that driving.” [Yn] cracks a smile, so Leon continues, “But don’t worry, I’m a good driver, despite what some of my friends would say. I’ve had some...exciting experiences with vehicles. If you’d like I could tell you some of those stories. They’re kinda funny looking back on them. But maybe we should wait until we’re off the road, don’t want you getting so spooked by my bad luck that you jump out of the car. It’s still a long walk to my place and I get kinda grumpy if I’m on my feet for too long.” Leon knows he’s rambling at this point, but when he hears [Yn] giggle softly he decides he would gladly talk until his voice gave out to hear it again. And when he looks to see her smiling eyes, biting her lip, her cheeks rosy, he can’t imagine anything more beautiful.

All too soon Leon pulls into the bus station parking lot. A man matching the picture Hunnigan sent is standing in the smoking area dressed plainly to avoid drawing attention. Leon parks and reaches over to grab a cigarette lighter from the glove box, stashing it in his pocket.

“Ok. I’m going to meet that man over there, get the stuff, and be right back here.” Leon wasn’t warned about [Yn] being a flight risk, but then again he wasn’t given much information in general. “I’ll be able to see you, and you’ll be able to see me the whole time. If you need help just flash the lights at me, ok? It’s this button here.” Leon shows her what to do, but [Yn] still looks concerned. “I’ll lock the doors, I’ll be back in ten minutes tops, and that man is another agent. You’re not going anywhere without me, ok?” He doesn’t want to scare her, but he needs to be sure she won’t run away. [Yn] seems to trust him at least a little at this point, and she hasn’t seemed interested in getting away, but she is an unknown Umbrella asset, and he needs to remember that. [Yn] still looks concerned, but nods in understanding. “Back in a flash.”

Leon exits the car and fights off a shiver as the cold air hits him. Stuffing his hands in his pockets he approaches the small group of smokers standing in the designated area. He makes a show of pulling out his lighter and patting his other pockets before sighing in mock defeat, looking to the man beside him in the non descript black outerwear jacket. “Got a spare?”

The man nods and pulls out a pack and shakes it, “Last one, lucky you.” Leon thanks the man and pulls out the last cigarette, pocketing the empty wrapper. The man nods and flicks his spent cigarette into the ashtray before walking away. Leon lights his and stands for a few minutes until the people around him leave before putting it out in the tray and walking to the lockers just inside a glass door. He takes the “empty” pack out from his pocket, tearing off the top and tipping the box until a small key falls into his palm. Smirking and mumbling under his breath about ‘mission impossible bullshit’, Leon opens one of the big lockers and removes a duffle bag and a warm winter coat hanging next to it.

Walking back to the car Leon can see [Yn]’s nervous gaze flitting over everyone at the station, before she noticed him coming back. A relieved smile crosses her face and her shoulders relax. Leon smiles at her as he unlocks the car and puts the bag in the back before taking his seat.

“Here. You can change once we get to my place, but for now at least you won’t be freezing.” Leon passes over the jacket and watches as [Yn] runs her hand over the fluffy fabric of the lining. Her eyes look far away, hand sweeping back and forth. “[Yn],” she blinks before her gaze focuses on Leon, “You ok?” She smiles and nods, but he’s still unsure. “Alright, what do you want for lunch?” He was sure that would get more of a reaction based on last time they discussed food, but [Yn] only shrugged and closed her eyes. Leon takes the quiet moment to think and decides it shouldn’t be anything too greasy or rich, unsure of how close he had been with his guess of crackers and water, and not wanting to overwhelm [Yn]’s stomach.

“How about sandwiches? There’s a good sub shop not too far away. Sound good?” [Yn] smiles and nods again, but at least she looks more enthusiastic. “Alright. Subs it is.”

***

Leon counts himself lucky that the sub shop seems to be having a slow day. A couple people are inside scrolling through their phones and a tired looking employee is sitting behind the counter. There are only a few cars in the parking lot as well, and no sign of more people coming down this part of the road. Leon gets out of the car and walks around to [Yn]’s side, opening the door for her, a hand out to help her if she needs it. “Are you ok to walk now? Do I need to carry you again?” [Yn] jumps down easily from the seat, giving Leon a haughty look. He puts up his hands in a placating gesture, closing the door and leading the way to the door.

As they walk in, they are hit with a mouthwatering wave of scents; fresh baked bread and cookies, spicy veggies, and assorted meats. Leon goes up to the counter to grab a menu and hands it to [Yn]. “What would you like? Get whatever you want.” [Yn] looks over the menu for a minute before looking up to Leon with a lost look. “There’s a lot to choose from, huh? How about this, I’ll get what I like, and we can split it, see what you think of it. You ok with that?” [Yn] looks relieved as she nods, and Leon walks to the counter to get his normal order, minus the usual spicy peppers.

[Yn] stands next to Leon as they watch the person behind the counter make the sandwich, but her eyes keep traveling to the other people in the room nervously and when a new person walks in with the chime from the bell on the door, she flinches closer to Leon, grabbing onto his jacket like a lifeline. Leon controls the urge to wrap an arm around her waist, instead taking her hand and holding it tightly in his, smiling down at her. He pays and takes the sandwich, leading [Yn] to the table in the corner, far from the door. She sits and he picks up the drink cups, “They have really good lemonade here. Would you like some?” [Yn] nods again and he has to keep himself from sighing. He’s glad [Yn] has some level of trust in him, and is comfortable enough to be close to him, but he wishes he could get her talking. He smirks when a plan forms in his mind.

Leon sits down across from [Yn] and slides her one of the cups. She takes a few large gulps of hers before coming up for air. “Thirsty?” He smiles at her so she knows he’s joking and she returns it with a sky look. Leon opens the wrapper and hands half the sandwich to [Yn] with a few napkins. He watches her take a bite, waiting for a reaction before starting in on his own. He can’t tell if she likes it or not by her expression, and after chewing and swallowing his first bite he puts his plan into motion.

“You know, this is one of my favorite places to eat? This shop has been here for years and I’ve never had a bad sandwich. And I love the sauce they make! It’s the owners recipe and he won’t tell a soul what’s in it.” All of what Leon is saying is utter bullshit. He’s been here before, sure, but he’s never seen the same person twice behind the counter, all bored college students who half the time look stoned out of their minds. But [Yn] is listening to everything he says with a neutral look on her face, a silent participator in the conversation, so Leon pulls out the acting skills, “So, what do you think? Bet you’ve never had a sandwich better than the ones they make here.” He worded the sentence carefully so she won’t have an easy yes or no. She shrugs instead, with the same polite smile, and Leon lets his face drop, his shoulders deflate, a look defining defeat, “Oh, ok. It’s ok if you don’t like it. I understand.” Leon almost feels bad when a stricken look crosses [Yn]’s face, but the next moment makes it worth it.

“What? No, I...I like it. That’s not what I…” She stops, confused when Leon’s face breaks into what he’s sure is a devious looking smile. She seems to understand what he did and she...rolls her eyes at him. But she doesn’t stop there, “Asshole,” the word is just a whisper, but Leon hears it anyway and can’t help the laughter that breaks out of his chest, and when [Yn] slaps her hand over her mouth, eyes wide, the laughter becomes uncontrollable. Only when she tries to fumble out an apology does he control himself, smiling across the table at her.

“No, I’m sorry I’m sorry. You’re right, I was being an asshole. I just wanted to see if I could get you to talk, besides to say that I’m pretty.” Her face grows even more red and she tries to apologize again, “It’s ok, really. It’s not like that’s the first time I’ve heard that. People say I’m gorgeous, and who am I to correct them?” The blush on his cheeks is probably giving away his embarrassment, he’s never known what to do with those comments. His awkward thanks to [Yn] when she’d called him pretty was the typical reaction he’d give, at least that time he hadn’t tripped over anything afterword, unlike last time…

Leon is drawn from his thoughts when [Yn] glares playfully at him and sticks out her tongue, crinckling her nose. He laughs again and she joins in with a quiet giggle. Leon feels his heart swell, and the smile feels permanent on his face.

Leon and [Yn] finish their meal and, after picking up a few warm cookies, get back on the road to Leon’s place.

@chloe-3-price @mitsuintheworks @imagineleonkennedy @locus-desperatus @biohazard4ever @sinnamon-bunn

Chapter 1

[barnes-belle]

Beauty and the Barnes (10)

FANDOM - MARVEL MCU

PAIRING - Bucky X Reader

WARNINGS - Lots of Smut, Light Hints of Non/Dub-Con, Prostitution, Swearing, Dark Bucky. (I can’t stress enough that this is kinda dark, Buckys an asshole and the kind of behavior that goes on in this fic is in no way acceptable in the real world)

When your father falls deathly ill you fall into a lifestyle you would have never predicted for yourself. Selling your body as a high-class escort isn’t ideal but it’s the only way to find the money you need to help your father, until your first client offers you another way.

Bucky’s mean, coarse and gets a kick out of watching you squirm but he is willing to help your father. All you have to do is sign yourself over to The Winter Soldier, body and soul.

Trapped in The Avengers compound, serving as a PA to a man who’s an absolute beast you find yourself wondering if there’s such a thing as a happy ending?

Masterlist

Chapter Ten 

It was a mistake, you knew it was. Whatever was waiting on the other side of that door was not something you could handle, whatever was hurting the super soldier was not a threat you could eliminate. But deep down, you knew there wasn’t an enemy in there, he wasn’t being attacked. It was why you didn’t alert Friday, why you didn’t call for help. The door creaked open and you saw exactly what you’d been afraid of.

Bucky was sprawled on top of the sheets of his bed, thrashing. Hoarse screams ripped from his throat and the sheer pain and terror in them weren’t just breaking your heart, they were pulverizing it. You needed to help him, you needed to make him stop making that terrible sound. All you wanted in that moment was to help him.

 You didn’t think about it.

 You should have thought about it.

 “Bucky…” You whispered his name into the dark room, your whisper being consumed by his harrowing cry’s.

 You found yourself next to him, your view of him blurred by your tear filled vision.

 “Bucky, it’s ok.” You promised, cupping his cheek in your hand and pushing his damp hair from his sweat soaked brow.

 He stilled under your touch and the screams died down to a whimper. You breathed a sigh of relief that was quickly extinguished when his metal hand closed around your throat and squeezed. His eyes snapped open and he stood up, his grip on you never faltering. Your feet dangled off the ground as he lifted you by the throat and you thrashed as your body fought to breathe. You couldn’t even gasp or croak his name or a plea for mercy. He looked at you coldly, without a flicker of recognition then as suddenly as he had grabbed you, he released you.

 You dropped to the ground, your legs unable to support you as you choked in a lungful of oxygen, gasping and coughing as your damaged throat tried to allow the air in.

 “Oh my god.” He whispered and threw himself backwards, away from you.

 You looked up, holding your throat as you tried to breath properly.

 You had never seen such a broken look on somebody’s face before. He looked utterly destroyed by what had just transpired, wrecked by the fact that he had almost just killed you.

 You coughed violently, curled in on yourself and your cheeks were wet with tears. Your neck felt like it was on fire, the skin felt raw. Minutes passed, while you knelt on the ground and choked and he stood in frozen horror and watched you. When you could finally breath without coughing, though it still felt like you were inhaling gravel, you looked up at him again.

 His eyes were dark and haunted, his face twisted in shame and fear, his whole body trembling so much it almost looked like he was vibrating.

 “I didn’t know it was you.” He said pleadingly.

 “I know.” You croaked.

 “I didn’t mean to.”

 “I know.” You said again.

 “You shouldn’t have been here. You weren’t supposed to be in here.”

 “I’m sorry.” You whispered.

 That was the worst thing you could have said as far as he was concerned. He could see the worry in your eyes, worry for him and not yourself. It killed him, knowing that you would forgive him for this. Knowing that you had put yourself in harms way because you just couldn’t fucking listen.

 “YOU WEREN’T SUPPOSED TO BE IN HERE!”

 You flinched at the sudden volume and sob tore itself painfully from your throat.

 “Get out. Get the fuck out.” He snarled.

 You shakily stood up and looked at him.

 “I’ll go and…”

 “LEAVE!” He roared, losing any semblance of composure.

 His fragile grasp on his self control slipped away and he grabbed the edge of the bedframe with his metal hand, flinging at clear across the room, mattress and frame. It crashed into the wall and splintered. He advanced on you and you instinctively backed up, until your back hit the doorframe. You saw a flicker of panic and desperation in his eyes and when he reached for you it almost seemed like he was going to pull you towards him but his shoulders shook violently and he pushed you away, out of the door. For a man who’d just demolished a bedframe with a flick of his wrist, the shove was gentle. His voice was not.

 “Get the fuck out. GO!” He screamed and slammed the door in your face.

 You ran.

 You ran out of the room.

 You ran down the corridor.

 You ran down the stairs.

 You just ran.

 You didn’t know where you were going, you didn’t have a plan. You just ran. You didn’t see the concerned Peter Parker look up just in time to see you sprint past, didn’t hear him call after you with a frown. You didn’t see the curious gazes of staff as you rushed past them. You focused on running, it was the only thought you could concentrate on.

  Bucky sank to his knees as a broken sob burst from him and he landed on all fours, his body refusing to hold him up. His vision swam and he blearily focused his gaze on the white card lying on the ground in front of him. He knew what it was, he recognized it. You must have dropped it when he… when it happened. You had kept the card, but not the flowers.

 Slowly, his mind mulled that strange fact over, relishing in something other than the look on your face when he’d been choking the life out of you to focus on. Piece by piece, he figured it out.

 You’d been cornered in your office by that slimeball Ben, seconds before you’d swept the flowers into the bin. You hadn’t known they were from him, you hadn’t seen the fucking card. You hadn’t rejected him, you hadn’t even known there was anything to reject.

 Every interaction he’d had with you since then was looked back on in a different light. When he’d told you that he didn’t want your friendship, you hadn’t seen it as his embarrassed defence. You’d seen it as cruel. And you had still pushed kindness onto him. He had never deserved it and he had always known it but he hadn’t realized just how much he didn’t deserve it.

 And when you had found the card, you had taken it here, to him. And he had nearly killed you, pushed you away again and hurt you. You were the softest thing he had ever touched, the kindest soul he had ever known and he had ruined it. The solace he found in you turned to ash in his mouth as the ramifications of what had just happened sunk in.

 You hadn’t rejected him.

 He had rejected you.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 You somehow made your way to the garage, to your old beat up truck. You slammed into the door, not having the foresight to slow down as you approached.

 “Belle, wait!”

 “No.” You sobbed, pulling the door open and getting in the car.

 “Belle, stop. What’s wrong?” Someone’s hand shot out and stopped you from closing the door.

 You automatically looked up and found Steve rogers gazing at you with intense concern, Peter Parker hovering behind him.

 “Oh my god.” Peter gasped.

 When you had looked up, your neck became clearly visible. Something frighteningly dark passed over Steve’s face and he stepped back from you. You frowned, confused until you saw where his eyes were focused. There must be a mark on your neck, a sign of what had happened.

 “Who did this?” Steve, no, Captain America asked.

 “It wasn’t his fault.” You whispered.

 The Captain looked suspicious for a moment before shock graced his features and he realised whos handprint was splayed across your throat.

 “Steve, he was asleep. I went in, even though he told me to never, ever go in.” You wept.

 “It’s ok, it’s going to be ok.” Steve promised, placing a tentative hand on the car door.

 “Let me go, I have to go.” You begged.

 “I don’t think that’s wise. You’re hurt Belle, let us take you to the medbay.” He said gently.

 “No! I have to leave, I should have never come here, I just made it all worse. Why would I ever think I could help him? Who the hell am I to help anyone? I broke the rules, I broke the deal. It was never supposed to be like this, I was supposed to just fuck him and file his paperwork, I wasn’t supposed to care about him.” You babbled, your voice strained with pain and emotion.

 “What did you just say?”

 “I wasn’t supposed to care.” You repeated.

 “Uh, Mr Rogers?” Peter said nervously.

 “Belle?” Steve pushed.

 “Let me go.” You begged.

 “How did you meet Bucky?” Steve asked firmly and you looked up in surprise.

 “You don’t know? I thought…” You whispered.

 “Peter, get her to the medbay.” Steve instructed, walking away stiffly.

 “Belle, can I help you? Please?” Peter asked softly, reaching out and stopping just short of touching you.

 “I don’t want to go out there just yet. Please don’t make me.” You begged.

 “Ok, that’s ok. We can sit here for a minute.” He said.

 “My throat, I need water. Can you?”

 “Yeah, I’ll get some. Hang on.” Peter said quickly, running off.

 As soon as he was gone you slammed the car door closed and when he heard it he realized you’d tricked him. By the time he turned around you’d already fished the keys out of the glove compartment and with one last apologetic glance in his direction you sped away.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 Steve’s anger melted away when he entered the room and saw Bucky knelt on the floor, silent tears shining in his eyes.

 “Buck.”

 “I hurt her.” Bucky said forlornly.

 “She said you didn’t mean to.” Steve assured him.

 “She’s gone isn’t she?”

 “Bucky… she should never have been here in the first place. I know you’re desperate to feel something, to connect. I know about the apartment in Brooklyn, what you do when you go there. I’m not naive. I’m not judging you, or her, but bringing her here was a mistake. You can’t pay someone to care about you.” Steve said, sighing heavily.

 “Don’t. Don’t talk about her like that.” Bucky snarled.

 “I’m not. I like Belle, she’s a wonderful person. She works hard and fits in well here and I think Tony would keep her on but Bucky, you need something real. You can’t force it or pay for it.” Steve reasoned.

 “It wasn’t like that, not really. I didn’t ask her to care, I asked her not too. I told her not to care but she did, she tried so hard to care. And I pushed her away.” Bucky said brokenly.

 “Bucky…”

 “She was doing it for her father. He’s sick, he’s dying. And she didn’t want to do it but she did anyway because she loves him. You don’t understand Steve, I need her. She’s so bright and kind, even in the middle of something dark and painful. She doesn’t make it better, nothing can make it better but she makes me want to try to make it better. She makes me want to be alive, not just to live.”

 “You care about her.” Steve said, understanding that Bucky’s feelings went far deeper than that.

 “I need her. And now she’s gone.”

 “She’s…”

 “Hey Cap, I tried to stop her but she drove away, I’m so sorry, she asked for water and when I went to get it she drove off.” Peter said hurriedly through the closed door.

 Steve saw the kids words physically break Bucky’s heart.

 “Go after her Buck, it’s not too late.” Steve told him, offering a hand to help him up.

 “I can’t.”

 “You can. You want to be better, be alive? Then go and get her, and do better. Things have to change, but we can make it work. This will never happen again, we won’t let it.” Steve said confidently.

 “She won’t come back.” Bucky whispered.

 “She will, she cares about you. She’s a wreck. So stand up and go after her. At least try.”

 Bucky took a deep breath and brushed his thumb across the card still clenched in his fist.

  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 When the car swerved out of control, you thought it was a patch of black ice. The snow had been falling all day, blanketing the world in white. It was still coming down now, adding a false sense of peacefulness to the situation. When you skidded to a stop, you looked back at the road and saw the row of spikes that you had driven across and knew it wasn’t ice that had derailed your car.

 “Get out of the car.” Someone yelled and a row of dark suited men melted out of the treeline, guns raised in your direction.

 Unfortunately, your car wasn’t bulletproof and neither were you so you had no choice but to do as they said. Heart hammering in your chest, you opened the door and got out.

 “Grab her.” One of them instructed.

 You put your hands up meekly and bowed your head in submission, your breath fanning in front of you as your panicked pants crystallized in the frigid air. When one of them stepped forwards to ‘grab you’, you made your move. Faster than you had ever moved in your life you threw yourself towards the opposite side of the road and sprinted for the trees. A bullet hit the ground by your feet and it spurred you on, making you push your body harder than you ever had in your life and you burst into the woods, into the cover of the trees.

 You didn’t know who they were, or why they wanted you (though you could guess), it didn’t matter. People with guns pointed at you were unlikely to have good intentions and if they wanted to take you, they’d have to work for it. You weren’t going to just hand yourself over, even if it meant getting hurt in the process. You heard them chasing you, could hear the crunch of their boots in the snow  but you didn’t look back, didn’t slow down.

 A bullet whizzed by your head, dangerously close and a hazy, half forgotten piece of advice you’d read online once or heard in a movie echoed in your brain.

 Zig Zag.

 You changed course, periodically moving from side to side and not running in a straight line. It almost worked, it was almost enough.

 Until you ran out of forest. You skidded to a halt at the edge of the moonlit lake you hadn’t know you’d been running towards.

 You jerked in fear at the loud bang of the gunshot right behind you and turned around the see three of the men advancing on you.

 “What do you want?” You demanded, sounding braver than you felt.

 “The Avengers took something that belongs to us and you’re going to help us get it back.” One of the told you smugly.

 “Hydra.” You sighed.

 You knew who they were now, knew what they wanted.

 “He won’t come for me.” You told them resolutely.

 “Yes he will.” Someone snarled an and there were three simultaneous gunshots, the three agents dropping in rapid succession.

 “Bucky?” You gasped as he stepped into sight, his gun held steadily in his hand.

 The moonlight reflected off his metal arm and you didn’t know whether to laugh or cry as he strode towards you.

 “We have to move. There are more.” He barked, just as the rest of the agents arrived on the scene.

 Without hesitating he stood in front of you, shielding you and firing his gun with deadly accuracy at the same time. But there were more of them and you heard his grunt of pain as a bullet hit him. He stumbled back slightly as one of the agents came barrelling towards him, a knife poised and ready.

 You had seen footage of The Winter Soldier in action before but nothing could have prepared you for the real thing. Bucky moved with a fluid, well-practiced grace that would have been beautiful if it weren’t for the danger he was in. You were so concerned with him, you didn’t notice the danger you were in until someone yanked you backwards by the hair and raised a knife towards your throat.

 You pained gasp drew Bucky’s attention and he immediately fired a bullet into the temple of the agent holding you, probably saving your life. But it gave his enemy a split second advantage and Bucky only narrowly avoided being stabbed in the chest.

 Your attackers grip on your hair had dragged you to the ground when his lifeless body fell and you pushed yourself away from the corpse quickly, spotting something on his belt and you didn’t hesitate to grab it. You had never held a gun before, it was heavier than you thought it would be but that didn’t slow you down and you turned around and aimed it. Bucky dodged and weaved, throwing well placed hits as he fended off the enemy and he could probably do this without your help. You didn’t need to pull the trigger. You didn’t need to shoot someone.

 But you weren’t going to take the risk.

 A gunshot was louder when you when you were the one holding the gun. The bullet you fired hit the final agent, tearing through his skull and sending his body crashing to the ground. Bucky looked at you, shock written all over his face.

 “Good shot.” He breathed out, wonderment and concern in his tone.

 “I was aiming for his leg.” You whispered.

 Maybe it was the adrenaline, maybe it was shock, maybe it really was just that funny but Bucky let out a surprised huff of laughter at your confession. You tried to stand up and he made a stride towards you before he stumbled and groaned, clutching his side.

 “Bucky?”

 “I’m ok.” He assured you but it was clearly a lie because he fell on the next step, falling onto the snow.

 You rushed towards him, half crawling and threw yourself onto the ground next to him, your hands frantically searching out the bullet wound he’d gotten protecting you. You found it on his shoulder, inched away from the metal. You desperately tried to stem the bleeding, pushing down on it.

 “I don’t, I don’t have my phone. Where’s your phone?” You demanded.

 “Compound.” He said softly.

 “Ok, ok. Car, did you drive? Maybe we can find their car. They must have had a vehicle. It wouldn’t have been on the road, so must be in the woods. Can you walk if I help you?” You asked him, forcing yourself to remain calm.

 “Belle.” He whispered, reaching up to stroke the bruised flesh of your throat with regret and shame in his eyes.

 “Bucky, can you walk?” You pushed.

 “I can walk.”

 You nodded and stood up, exerting your strength to pull him up and hoisting his flesh arm over your shoulder.

 “I have a car. It’s with yours. I saw yours on the road.” He said quietly and you exhaled in relief.

 He put a surprisingly small amount of his weight on you as you helped him through the trees. You hadn’t realized how far you had ran, it must have been a good mile and with every step you felt worse and worse. This was all your fault, if you had just listened to him and not gone in that room then none of this would have happened. Bucky had done a lot of horrible things, but the bruising on your neck wasn’t his fault. You had woken up a PTSD ridden soldier from a nightmare, and the chain of events it had set in motion had gotten him shot.

 You didn’t even realize you were crying until he leaned to the side and wiped a tear from your cheek, despite the hiss of pain when he moved his shoulder. You didn’t look at him, you couldn’t. You kept your eyes ahead and nearly sobbed in relief when you saw the road through the trees. You managed to get him there, to the passenger side of the black SUV he’d left parked in the middle of the road. You helped him into the car but when you tried to move away and close the door he pulled you back with a surprising amount of strength.

 “Don’t leave me.” He begged.

 “I’m not, I’m going to the other side of the car.”

 He shook his head and pulled you closer, nearly pulling you onto his lap as he rested his head on your shoulder.

 “Don’t leave me.” He asked again softly.

 You felt something wet trickle onto your skin and knew he was crying.

 He had nearly died for you, had unflinchingly placed himself between you and the danger, even though it was your fault the two of you were in that position. However harsh he could be with his words sometimes, however cruel, there was a good man underneath it all.

 “I’ll stay.” You promised.

Bucky: *Choking Belle* Belle: *Gasping* Harder... Daddy... Bucky: What? Belle: What? Steve: *Kicking down the door* WHAT?!?!

I need to make it clear, I am NOT romantasizing mental health issues. Suspend reality and accept that 90% of what goes on in this fic is NOT OK IN REAL LIFE! (Except shooting nazi's, that's totes ok.)

@spnqueen02 @nogardsoahk @chipilerendi   @youwerespared @jessieray98@nochampagnesocialist@scarlettswxtch@dropthepizza346@jsmith509@musingpredilection@shirukitsune@dragonrosegardens @sexyvixen7@spicymagz @teh-nerdette@nerdy-bookworm-1998@australianhorrorstory  @thejourneyneverendsx @mysweetcookie99

[thedyingmoon]

💜 This I Promise 💜

***

XXXI. Friend

***

YOU FUCKING SLUT!

Disgusting,...

Filthy,...

Did I give you permission to talk?

Bullshit! Redo the whole thing!

******

"Ivanna, stop! Now, I'm gonna redo the whole thing,..."

Levi was startled upon hearing (F/N)'s shriek outside his house. He let his guard down for a moment, and his yard is turning into complete chaos, thanks to the girls who invaded the property.

But, that's not the thing that he should be actually thankful for.

The girls' noises somehow woke him up from his own thoughts.

He put the tea tray down the glass table, walked over to the window, parted the heavy, crimson curtain and peeked outside to see (F/N) as she tried to pick up the flowers that Ivanna scattered all over the place. Tried.

"Ivanna, for the sake of the three Walls, stop messing around!" (F/N) begged as she watched the little girl run to the neatly swept leaves not far from an oak tree to scatter them.

Levi blinked. For a second, he still couldn't quite believe that they're both in this situation instead of them getting ready for, yet, another full - scale Expedition. He couldn't believe that it had almost been four months since those terrible things happened.

But, most of all, he couldn't believe that he was very awful and mean to (F/N) for a very stupid reason.

And the reason?

Well, let's just say he was just thankful that she's over and done with.

"IVANNA!"

Levi stopped worrying of the past and decided to rescue her from the brat. He opened the door and quickly made his way towards them.

(F/N) was about to run out of patience when the haughty lord of the house finally came to her rescue. She glanced at Elvis and just rolled her eyes.

"Well, thank you for gracing us with your presence, Your Highness." (F/N) exclaimed sarcastically. "Where have you been? I thought you'd help me rein in Ivanna?"

What in the actual - ?

"Excuse me?" Levi answered, totally taken aback by (F/N)'s attitude.

"You said you'd take care of her while I'm cleaning your yard! Now, I have to do this all over again."

Levi's eyes widened at the sound of her voice. He never actually heard her whine before. Or complain. He was just used to hearing her speak in monotones. Plus, she just cried or mopped most of the time due to all the emotional harassment she received from him.

He looked around and realized that she was absolutely right. The place is a complete mess. Nothing changed, at all, despite her efforts.

"Well?" (F/N) whined once more.

As much as Levi hated hearing someone whine in front of him, he could not get angry with her. He could not even lash out at her. Her memories are gone, after all. What if this is one of the side effects of memory loss?

But, then, memory loss or not, he could no longer hurt her in any way possible.

Not anymore.

Levi sighed and faced (F/N) once more.

"I - "

"Yes?"

He was just about to speak and he was already being interrupted. Well! Even that bitch Petra never dared to interrupt him while he was speaking. She just smiled sweetly at him and even batted her eyelashes at him.

Gross,...

Why did I just realize that now?

"My lord?" (F/N) suddenly asked, the tone of her voice changing from annoyance to worry. "Are you alright?"

The girl went closer to him until she was merely inches away from his face. He tried to look away from embarrassment at being this close to (F/N) when he noticed her (E/C) hues staring straight into his dull, blue ones. Like she was drilling into his soul, or something like that.

Strange, he thought, she never looked at me like this before,...

"Tch!" he clicked his tongue and finally looked away. Of course, (F/N) was always worried about him.

He just didn't care back then.

"I'm sorry, alright?" he whispered weakly.

"For what?"

Levi looked at her in surprise and just rolled his eyes. Her memory loss surely had made her very unpredictable! Very unpredictable, indeed.

"For not keeping an eye out on the br- kid! Okay?"

"Oh." (F/N) murmured and stepped a bit further away from him. "That's fine. You said you have a headache." She turned her back against him and continued sweeping. "Don't worry about me. That's just me coping up with stress. Go on. You could take a rest now, Lord Shunerman. I will shut my mouth now. This I promise."

"No." (F/N) heard the lord say before feeling a strong, yet gentle grip on her left arm. She looked up and faced Elvis once more.

"Yes, my lord?" she asked him like nothing happened.

"This is what kept me,..."

A few moments later, (F/N) was seated on a large, expensive - looking sofa. She looked around and noticed how fully furnished the entire place is, from glittering chandeliers to posh furniture. Then, as if by instinct, she snapped her eyes to the little girl seated beside her.

"Touch anything and I'll tell aunt Marie to not give you candy for a month." (F/N) threatened.

The little girl whined and hugged her, almost pouring her large blue eyes out at her. "No! You can't do this!" Ivanna begged.

"Why shouldn't I? You've caused me enough trouble as it is."

"But,... NO!"

Levi saw this little scene the moment he came back from the pantry, and it made him stop for a while.

All of a sudden, instead of seeing a blonde brat, he saw a little girl with midnight - colored locks clinging unto her. The two stopped arguing for a while upon noticing him and looked at him. Strangely, he noticed that (F/N)'s hair had become short and curled. Plus, she was now wearing what looked like a (F/C) dress that was out of fashion, same with the little girl. But, what unnerved him the most was the eye color of the dark - haired child beside her.

It was steel blue.

"My lord?" Levi heard (F/N) say. It was like her voice echoed from inside a very long and deep tunnel. He closed his eyes and opened them again, only to see her and Ivanna looking back at him.

"You better stop calling me that." Levi muttered, bewildered at what he just witnessed, and seated himself across the two of them on an equally large and cozy sofa. He placed the basket of pastries on the table in front of them.

"What is it, my lord?"

"Yeah. That." he grumbled and massaged his throbbing temples.

"Oh. And why is that?"

Levi looked at her with his cold eyes and clicked his tongue.

"Because I'm pretty sure you have no regard for high - ranking people, anyway."

"Oh." (F/N) whispered and looked away, never attempting to deny what Elvis had just said to her. Levi, on the other hand, just took it as an affirmative.

He looked at Ivanna and gestured at the basket full of treats. "I know you want those. Dig in."

Ivanna let out a triumphant scream and immediately took a cookie.

"What do you want me call you, then?" (F/N) said, watching Levi pour tea into two dainty white cups. "I-is Mr. Shunerman enough?"

"You didn't even let me talk." he answered.

"What do you want, then?"

"Mr. Shunerman, or whatever. It's up to you." he said, handing her a cup in a weird fashion. He held it by the rim and not by the handle.

"Okay, I'll just call you Mr. Shunerman. Elvis sounds stupid, anyway." she said, taking the cup from him. "No offense."

The girl is right, Levi thought, Elvis really sounds stupid. Who would name their sons that?

He just shrugged his shoulders and sniffed his tea. "Like I said, whatever you want." He was going to sip when he noticed that she was still looking at him. "Are you gonna drink that or not? It's not drugged, ya know?"

(F/N) flinched at his tone and looked at the swirling dark liquid inside the cup. "Oh! Yes. Thank you for the tea, Mr. Shunerman."

She carefully took a sip of the thing and quickly prevented herself from gagging. This hurt Levi, being a person who loves black tea so much.

"What?"

"I'm sorry, Mr. Shunerman, but it's too, ah,..."

"Bitter." he finished for her.

(F/N)'s eyebrows furrowed. She bit her lower lip and just nodded.

Levi raised an eyebrow and gulped down the whole thing in his cup. He set the cup down, not taking his eyes off her.

"What's the point of drinking black tea if you put something else in it, huh?"

"To make it more flavorful." (F/N) answered him.

"But, that would ruin the tea, wouldn't it? It's supposed to be bitter, you know."

(F/N) just smiled at him.

"Tea doesn't always have to be bitter. It's up to you whether you give it personality or not."

Levi was actually dumbfounded at her answer.

"Well, we all have an opinion." he muttered. "But, being bitter doesn't always necessarily mean that it is lacking in personality. Maybe it's just the way it is. Maybe it's better that way. You shouldn't criticize something without knowing the facts first, young lady."

"Yeah, well, at least you should have given it a worthy and rightful companion for it to not be bitter in the first place."

Levi gulped. Were they still talking about tea? And for (F/N) to talk back to him like that! What a sharp tongue! This has definitely never happened before! Aside from that one time she almost broke his fist.

Which is the real you, (F/N)? I'm confused.

"In a good way, or in a bad way?" she carefully asked him.

He felt suddenly cold and sweaty at the same time upon realizing that he had said his last thoughts aloud.

He grabbed a plain lemon - infused vanilla cookie from the basket and turned away from her.

"Shut up, brat." he said, taking a bite of the treat and finally admitting defeat.

"Shut up, brat! Heeheehee!" Ivanna imitated what Levi had just said and giggled uncontrollably.

"Are we friends now?" (F/N) asked him, her genuine smile making his cheeks a little less pale and a little more pink.

"Not a chance, brat."

(F/N) just laughed at what he said, and it honestly made him even more confused. He just couldn't understand girls.

And what's even more, it was the first time he saw and heard her laugh.

Ever.

And it sounded beautiful to his ears and looked cute to his eyes.

"We chatting and teasing like this? We're basically friends now, aren't we?" she said, ignoring Ivanna's giggles.

Levi rolled his eyes for, like, the third time this day.

Or was it the fourth?

"Whatever. Just take the brat now and go back home. Your aunt would surely go looking for you."

"Oh, you're right! Let's go now, Ivanna. Don't forget to thank Mr. Shunerman."

"Thank you, Mr. Shining - Man." the girl said, waving and smiling sweetly at him. Surely the effects of cookies.

Levi cringed at what the brat just called him and just ignored her. What he couldn't ignore was (F/N).

"What about your yard, Mr. Shunerman?" she told him.

"I'll do it. I'll just,... let my headache subside for a while."

She smiled at him.

"Okay. I'll see you soon."

Levi just nodded.

No, don't go yet. Please,...

******

"Give us those cookies, Petra!" a snotty little boy of ten bullied. He was accompanied by another who also kept sniffing.

"Yeah! Give us those." the other bully said to her.

"No!" Petra exclaimed, trying her very best to cover the basket full of those treats. "My mother made these for me. I won't give it to you! Never!"

"Then, we'll just take it from you! Peter!"

"Aye, Sarge!"

Before the boys could take the basket from Petra, a little girl came running towards them. She was wearing what looked like a boy's school uniform and she was holding a broom, waving it above her head to look intimidating.

"DON'T TOUCH PETRA, OR ELSE, I'LL BEAT YOUR SORRY ASS INTO A BLOODY PULP!" the little girl shrieked at them.

"Shit! It's (F/N)!" Peter screamed like a little girl.

"Let's get the hell outta here!"

The boys left Petra and alone and scrambled away from the maniac as far away from her as possible.

"(F/N)! What are you doing here?" Petra said to her. She was more than glad that her sister saved her from those bullies, yet again.

"I skipped class." (F/N) declared proudly.

"You didn't even go to class! And what are you wearing? It doesn't suit you."

"Well, I'm pretending to be a boy." the girl answered, dropping her broom and trying her best to cover her thick (H/C) locks beneath a school cap.

"Why are you pretending to be a boy?"

"So I could be a hero and save the ones I love!"

Petra smiled at this. "Silly. Girls could be heroes, too."

"That's not true! Boys are always the heroes of the story. Just look at them!"

(F/N) pointed at the two Scouting Legion Soldiers in full uniform walking past them. Some teenage girls nearby swooned upon seeing them.

"Look! It's Erwin Smith and Mike Zacharius!" a redhead said.

"They're so dreamy! I'll die!" her blonde friend said.

"Oh my gosh!"

"Notice me!"

"Ahh!"

The men just scratched their heads in embarrassment, smiled awkwardly at them and went on, quickly escaping them.

"Ugh, I don't want to grow up like those girls." (F/N) said, revolted at what she just saw. "You see? Boys are a lot cooler than girls! Plus, they get their own weapons and they get to fight the bad guys!"

"That's not true." Petra said. "You'll become a hero just like them. Someday. You'll see."

"You think so?"

"Yeah."

(F/N) beamed.

"You really are my dear friend, Petra."

"Not just a friend, (F/N). I'm your sister."

***

~ @levi4mikasa , @nerdyphantomlady , @yepps , @shewolfofficial , @unhappysap , @super-peace-fangirl , @fangurl-ontgeside , and @emilyackerman78 . 💜

***

💜💜💜

***

[nomimits7]

Mission Bangtan | 5

Title: MISSION BANGTAN pt5

Pairing: OT7 x Reader

Ratings: M

Warnings: language. Violence. Talk of abuse. Mentioning of sexual abuse. This chapter is intense !

Summary: As a professional eliminator you are ordered to get rid of Bangtan. A group of trained fighters hiding behind the mask of BTS. Your mission is successful until you get to know them. Will Y/N be able to complete the mission, or will she end up protecting her target from the real danger?

Author note: Bold, Italics are either dreams or flashbacks. Please note this chapter is a bit intense! I’m sorry…

Once again thank you @feed-my-geek-soul 

“I already told you I won’t allow you to take my child! You already took my husband from me!” your mother hissed as she spoke over the phone. You listened, you were always listening. They just never knew.

Hide and seek was your favorite game to play. No one could ever find you. You also loved solving riddles, anything that would challenge your mind. You could solve any puzzle, any problem, anything that required the use of your brain in record time. You knew you were different. None of your friends, not even your mother could unravel the things your mind could. No one could hide like you, no one could think as fast as you, no one could be smart or calm like you. Your father always helped you ‘develop’ these special traits as much as possible when he was home. He doted on you, taught you ways to challenge your mind, offered different approaches to solve a problem, all in the hopes that it would expand your mind. Even though your father weren’t always there, when he was… he would grab you, put you on his shoulder and start to run. He always painted your world in the most colour full of ways. He was a dreamer, just like you.

As your mother hung up, your father entered. “They won’t stop till they have her. She is the only one that has the gene strong enough to stop them. Honey, we need to keep her sa- “

A loud crash was heard outside. People entering the house with guns, screaming. You knew you should keep quiet. As you sat in your hiding spot you watched your father fight. He was incredible, moving as if gravity had no effect on him. Unfortunately, he had a weakness, your mother. They grabbed her, making your apparently undefeated father…totally helpless. That’s when it started, the torture of watching what they did to her. The cuts, the screams, the blood… so much blood. You closed your eyes trying to unsee the already seen. Her lifeless, cold eyes stared right back at you even in the dark of your unconsciousness…

“No… stop please make them stop!! -- I don’t want to go !!-- leave me! —MOM!!!! DAD!!!! DON’T LEAVE ME !!!”

You were a shaking mess. Cold sweat forming on your to hot skin. Tears escaping uncontrollably. You needed to wake the fuck up. But your body refused. Whimpering, you re-lived that day over and over again until all you could see was darkness. No more blood, just faint whispers.

If it was even possible you lost consciousness in your sleep. Your body never stopped trembling, tears never stopped flowing, scared whimpers never stopped escaping.

“Hyung what’s happening? She’s shaking like a leaf! O.m.g. is that tears?” Jimin asked alarmed.

As one all 6 remaining men turned around. Shock, concern and anger crossing their faces in seconds settling on the later. They didn’t know your story, but they most definitely felt your pain. In that moment they wished they could see the soft face of the fragile girl they felt, no, knew was underneath that mask of intimidation you wore.

“Fuck…” Yoongi whispered. “What ever she is seeing must be really bad to break such mask as hers.” Agreeing hums were heard throughout the van. Just then the van stopped moving. Hoseok carried your sleeping form to the private plane as the others formed a circle around the two of you. Setting you in a seat, they strapped you in and moved to their own seats.

The first few hours went by relatively quiet. Jimin, Hoseok and Yoongi was sleeping peacefully. Namjoon was busy with his laptop. Jin, Jungkook and Tae were playing games. All trying not to look at your restless sleeping form. They wanted to give you more drugs to calm you but quickly realized that you were past the point of calmness. So, they had no choice but to let you be. To say it was unnerving was an understatement.

A few hours into the flight your whimpers went silent. THIS did not go unnoticed. Your whole body went still, not a single muscle moved, you even stopped breathing. This was alarming to say in the least.

Namjoon slowly got up. Carefully he walked towards your now still form. “Y/N…?” Yes, he was careful. They didn’t know how you would react, and a plane was not an ideal fighting ground.

Softly he touched your arm. As his feather touch registered in your unfocussed brain you flinched. For even though the drugs were will in affect you were more aware now. Not completely conscious, you only saw him, felt him, sensed him. Flashes of what happened on that night when you turned 16 made their way to your mind’s sight…

He took your hand in his. Running his thumb over each small digit. You were his most prized catch. But you were a very determined young girl. Way too smart for his liking. Way too brave and domineering. You were a risk and he knew it. You could ruin his life’s work in a flash and he was determined to do what ever it took to break you, tame you. You had to submit to him. Only then would he truly have all the power.

You were young, just turned 16 but he didn’t care. He had a future to think of, plus he was a man. He had needs.

Leading to his room you felt scared… you can’t fully recall the whole evening, but you recalled enough to hate him.

“Y/N… you’re so beautiful. Did you wear this dress for me? Too bad it won’t have any use when I’m through with you, baby girl.”

Before you could protest you felt his body against yours. His sweat dripping down his face, landing on your small, tears stained face. You don’t recall how long the whole ordeal lasted. You stopped fighting a few minutes in, just laying there you pleaded for him to stop. But it was to late.

“S-stop… p-pleasee sir it hurts. Please stop.”

After what felt like forever, he finally let you go with a smirk.

“This was fun baby girl. Maybe next time I can do more than just fuck you.” He whispered as you left his room. On trembling legs, you made your way to your room. You didn’t sleep for at least 2 weeks. Since that day you never looked him in the eye. This man was evil, and you would never rest until you get to see the life drain from his eyes as you looked on with that same smirk, he always send your way. That satisfaction of seeing the fear in his eyes. It was on that day that you decided to turn on him when the time is right… all you had to do was wait.

Still unconscious your body went into auto pilot. You grabbed Namjoon’s hand, in one motion you unbuckled your seat belt, turned and connected your elbow to his jaw sending him across the plane’s floor. At this the rest of the members became fully awake and they all turned to look at you. You were breathless, standing in your crouched position, eyes still closed. You took off like a bullet towards Namjoon. You were out for blood as you grabbed his arms and twisted it behind his back, just a mere tug away from breaking it. He was so surprised he had no time to react. Jin stepped in breaking your hold on Namjoon he spun you around and sent you staggering backwards.

“Stop, she’s not conscious. She doesn’t know what she is doing.” Namjoon’s stopped the younger three from attacking. “We need to calm her down. Not provoke her.” Jin said.

Carefully Hoseok and Yoongi approached you. Yoongi took hold of your left arm as Hoseok took hold of your right.  You reacted by trying to get free of their hold. They held your squirming form as Jungkook and Tae approached you. Jungkook took hold of your waist as Tae whispered into your ear… “It’s okay sweetheart. We won’t hurt you”

At these words you stilled. Anger flared up as you heard his words echo in your mind. “Relax Baby girl, this will hurt a bit, but you can take it. I won’t hurt you unnecessarily…” Head butting Jungkook you twisted out of Yoongi and Hoseok’s grasp away from them. Without warning Tae grabbed you from behind and pinned you against his chest. Twisting both your bodies around he dropped onto a seat. With you squirming in his lap he looked over to his hyungs for instructions. Clearly something was triggering you, and they hated to admit that they had an inkling as to what had happened.

Their first priority now was to calm you down. Clearly words or touches was a big no-no. Within seconds Jin moved to his ‘special’ bag. Even if he was the ‘Master of poison’ he also specialized in all types of drugs. He rummaged through his bag for his special bottle. Special K mixed with powdered rescue and some other relaxing drug which name he could never remember. This was a strong combination. Strong but effective. Within seconds Tae felt your body going limp once again. As you inhaled the drug your mind blanked. A sweat sheet of nothingness overtook every bit of your consciousness. All seven watched as you as you slowly relaxed into Tae’s chest.

“We’ll take turns to hold her. We can’t risk leaving her untouched. The constant human contact will keep her from going Rambo on our asses again.” Namjoon said as he rubbed his still sore jaw. As one the rest nodded and resumed their previous seats. For the rest of the flight you were passed around like a feather in the wind. For the first time in years you slept without any bad reminders. For the first time in a while you were just a normal girl, sleeping peacefully in the arms of one of seven men that saved you without you knowing it.

Even though they felt horrible about  whatever you had been through, they still couldn’t trust you and vice versa. The first thing you noticed was the straight jacket. The next was your tied feet and you were lying on a very comfortable bed. Trying to sort through the mess of fuzzy thought, you opened your eyes to see five pairs staring back at you. Groaning you rolled over. Your body felt like you fought a Tiger, Lion and a mouse at the same time with no weapons.

“Call Jin and Hoseok. It’s time to get our answers.” Namjoon instructed as Jimin helped you sit up on the bed. You sat as still as a you could manage, not knowing what these men were going to do. You were afraid of what they can do with you bound and helpless like this. What if they were the same as him?

Jin and Hoseok entered the room. Hoseok watching you like a hawk and Jin approaching you slowly with a bottle of some sorts. Instinctively you shrunk back, eyes big with fear. You needed to get out of here. NOW!

“Woah! Easy there, he won’t hurt you or touch you. That’s just something for the nausea.” Yoongi said with a small voice. Nausea? What naus… without even completing your sentence you felt the bile rise in your throat. You threw your head over the side of the bed, releasing all the cropped-up emotions into a bucked. A smoothing hand patted your back as you emptied your insides. Well, that was new.

Like darkness disappearing as light enters everything that happened came rushing back to you. The concert, the hotel, the fight and that sting in your neck… the rest unknown to you. Wait… where are you? This isn’t the hotel and it’s late afternoon from what you can tell by the sky. Looking up you locked eyes with Jungkook. He was staring straight at you, without blinking.

“Has no one ever told you it’s rude to stare?” You sarcastically ask. A grin spread across his face as he lifted an eyebrow in a way to sexy manner. This boy could steal hearts in an instant. His doe eyes are so childlike, yet one can get lost in them. Huh… he’s quite attractive aaannndd why am I thinking this? Idiot… Focus.

“Well, you sure are full of surprises, aren’t you? You should be proud. You fought like a trapped animal on the plane. Your muscle memory is amazing.” Jimin casually commented.

“Wha- what plane ??” you nearly screamed.

“Where the fuck am I? What did you do to me?” you were past hysterical now. Flashes of what these seven men could have done to you played on repeat in your mind. No, not again… it took you too long to build that mask and bury those feelings for these seven idiots to ruin your act.

You began struggling to get loose. As if a simultaneous glitch occurred in their brains, your words sunk in slowly and before they could react you broke your restraints. Wiggling like your life depended on it you got rid of your shoes and slipped your feet through the restraints at your feet. All seven men tried to catch you, but adrenaline was on your side as you took off like a bullet. You gave one push and sent Yoongi and Jimin to the floor, Jungkook into Tae and Namjoon and you ducked as Jin and Hoseok tried to grab you.

You had no time to think before you barged into the hall. Following your gut, you turned left and bolted. You could hear footsteps catching up, so you ducked right into an open door. It was a room of sorts. Bed, window and another door that lead to the bathroom you imagined. You dived under the bed just as the footsteps reached the door.

One thing was certain as you saw those footsteps entering the room. You were royally fucked.  

Part 6

Tag list: @kpop-queendom @spookybananapurseturtle @btsxskz02  @leesound @callmepaopao @holo-homosapien @larakiba @xxqueenwxtchxx @spirit-catbuss @unicornsandpinguins @gypsygoddess42013 @sparky-isnt-a-vampire @kristimarilin @xxgothickxx

p.s. I only tag those who liked my previous update... unless they ask me to tag them <3 

[littlecrookedheart]

Amen, Amen • Unfolding

Catch Up : Reckoning | Rum on the Fire | Like You're Made of Glass

Character(s) : Noah Marshall, Jane Marshall, Matt Pivouz (OC), Vinny Trovato (OC), brief mention of Lucia and Peter Trovato (OC)

Rating : MATURE. Language warning. Please read at your own risk. I’m issuing a general trigger warning for the entirety of this story. THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS SENSITIVE CONTENT SURROUNDING DRUG USE, MURDER, SUICIDE AND POSSESSION.

Time : This takes place 14 years after Jane’s death and roughly 5 years after the events in ILITW. Noah is 22 years old.

Word Count : 5,100 (or so)

Author’s Note : Have some answers to your Matt related questions!

Key : Perspective switches will be marked with ** | Time jumps will be marked with –

Soundtrack | Chapter Inspiration

"You in there? Keep your eyes on me."

Matt's voice swam in and out as if he were underwater, one arm around Noah, the other blocking his line of vision while they made it back inside the church. Noah's knees were buckling as often as he'd take steps, Matt having to nearly carry him inside of the church.

If you were a passerby, you'd see clarity, an empty space of land, dead and barren, two men walking through. You'd see overgrown vines, crumbling cement, the breeze turning stalks of brown grass into an ocean. But if you could see it, oh if you could see it, you would not be able to tear your eyes away.

With Noah hooked on one arm, Matt dodged what seemed to be warping, pitch black shadows of children, wailing deafeningly into the sky as they swarmed around Noah. They bent at unnatural angles, solidifying and cracking open, spilling out multitudes of maggots and beetles.

"What the fuck!" Matt screamed, trying to shake Noah awake as his feet trudged through the abyss of insects.

Once inside, the wailing grew louder, silhouettes of locusts flooding the windows matched the sound of loud, heavy banging against the walls and door. Matt left Noah against a pew, rushing over to open a bottle of water and coaxing Noah into drinking it. Finally, Noah opened his eyes fully, looking around at his surroundings. He jerked backwards, almost in shock, taking breaths and counting to seven, watching Matt head over to the altar where he kneeled down, dropping his head and silently praying.

Noah stood to his feet, wobbling over to Matt, putting his hand on his shoulder. Matt flinched under Noah's touch, looking up in horror before realizing who it was.

"Thank you for saving me," Noah mumbled, his voice like a hoarse whisper.

Matt's mouth moved in reply, but Noah couldn't hear him, the screams from the shadows and humming of the locusts drowning out all sound. Noah pressed his palms to his ears, turning around to face the door, one too many stupid ideas running through his mind. He ran forward, nearly collapsing, Matt's hand reaching to hold him back but falling short. Noah's hand hit the door handle, burning hot and crackling with a strange, dark energy, causing him to immediately let go and fall backwards, skidding across the splintering floor. He squeezed his eyes closed, audibly counting his sevens, over and over, until all went silent.

He warily looked around, the church having been entirely restored, with shining floors and brand new pews, the windows bright and beautiful as they reflected the afternoon sun. Rainbows danced along the wall of the altar, beams of light shining through stained glass at the east end of the church. Noah's breath was heavy as he stood up, creeping around the corner, eyes seeking out the source of this version of reality.

**

And there she is, Jane. She's standing in a long, white dress, her hair flowing down her shoulders. She looks like an angel. She doesn't even see me? I'm standing right in front of her, and she's just swaying, humming.

"Janie?"

"Katai! You took forever, what the heck!"

She's running...right through me. I'm turning around to see..Katai, as a kid, smiling at her and taking her hand. They're leaving. Running to the door, giggling. And now Katai is looking back at me, and they just smile, a wink, and I can't help it but..was that a message? What's happening?

"Mattie?"

On the front pew is a boy with jet black hair and the same hazel eyes Matt has, the kind with rims of gold and just a dash of green. I don't know who Matt's brother was, but this has to be him. It has to be. He looks so clean, so pristine and put together, kneeling on the pew, looking at me. Does he think I'm Matt?

"I'm Noah."

"Where's Mattie?" He's asking, and all of a sudden he's right in front of me. How can he see me when Jane couldn't?

"He's not here...I'm sorry."

"That's okay. Are you friends?"

Friends...right. Hardly, but I'm nodding.

"I can't stay here..." He's trailing off, smiling as he looks around the room. Beams of blue and green light are washing over him and he seems to glow, like he was fashioned of the stained glass himself.

"Can you tell him I waited for him? But I have to go now."

"I'll tell him." Will I? Does Matt deserve to know that his brother has been waiting for six years and now he's gone? Maybe it's better if he thinks his brother is still around.

"Tell him I heard him talking to me. I stopped the dark thing. But I -"

And he's gone, shimmering away into the light. And the church starts to decay, years or an eternity, even, flashing before my eyes. Left in ruins. Matt on that altar, looking up at me.

"How did you-"

"What was your brothers name?"

**

"What? Um.." Matt reached down, searching for something to grip as he lowered himself to the floor, burying his palms into his eyes and hid fingers in his hair.

"Vincenzo. V-Vinny." Matt looked up at Noah, confusion across his face.

"He...I think.."

"You saw him, didn't you?"

Noah sat on the floor across from him, brushing the hair out of his eyes before nodding. "He said to tell you that he stopped the dark thing. And..."

"He said more?"

"Yeah he said he's been waiting for you but..."

Noah bit his lip, seeing Matt's eyes start to glimmer. I can't do it.

"He said he's been waiting for you. Then he said to 'tell Mattie I love him.'"

Noah watched Matt, for the first time since they'd met, lose his composure. He became a river, drawing his knees to his chest, sobbing hard into them.

After a few moments, Matt looked up, wiping his eyes with the sleeves of his sweater.

"Did you ask him for help earlier? When you were praying?" Noah asked, worried to overstep.

Matt nodded, sniffling as a smile turned on his lips. "Yeah. I can't believe you saw him. Was he okay? Did he say anything else? Was he alone?"

"Uh...yeah, he was fine. He actually looked... beautiful. I saw Jane, too, but she didn't see me. And my old friend Katai. Your brother was the only one who talked to me, though."

"Vinny," Matt suggested, leaning over to grab his coat from a nearby podium. "Call him Vinny. It makes it more real."

Noah took a breath, sighing. "Vinny. Vinny was the only one who talked to me."

Matt shrugged a shoulder, letting out a small laugh. He fumbled through the pockets of his coat, pulling out a black leather wallet. Inside, two folded up photos stuck out of a compartment, Matt pulled hem out and handed them to Noah.

Noah took the photos, opening them to their full size. The first was old, Matt's unmistakable grin not having changed since even this. Vinny looked about three, which would leave Matt nine, the two of them holding a wicker basket of berries, purple and magenta staining their hands and mouths. Noah smiled at the photo, flipping it over. Across the back was scrawled in a dainty handwriting, 'Matteo, 10 Vincenzo, 4 berry picking with grandma.'

"Matteo, huh?"

"Shut up," Matt laughed, taking the photo from Noah and gazing at it, beaming at the memory.

The second photo was the boy Noah just met, Vinny, in a striped yellow shirt, his hair blowing in the wind.

"That was his twelfth birthday. Magic Mountain," Matt said, pointing to the background. "Three months before he died."

Noah handed the photo back to Matt, mindlessly picking his nails in intervals of seven.

"The berry picking, that's what I hold onto. I don't know if he even remembered it, but I do. That's my light."

"I hate that I saw him and you didn't, " Noah said, biting a fingernail.

"I've seen him so many times. Just..not the way you did."

Noah furrowed his brow, looking up at Matt.

"You saw him how I see Jane, didn't you?"

Matt looked away, staring into space.

"Something like that."

**

How could that be? Matt said Vinny died from an aneurysm, 'how fucked is that?' Why would these demons plague Vinny, or Matt, the way they do Jane and me? She was taken, physically taken, her soul left to linger for a decade. Vinny died, like people do, a death not uncommon. Did Matt lie to me? Maybe Vinny was swallowed up, too, by something just as sinister. Maybe Matt can't say it.

I can't say I blame him. Lord knows how many moments I tried to smash my words into something others could understand. Mom and Dad did just fine, lying through their teeth, saying Jane died in her sleep. Saying it was a...

Holy shit.

"Matt, I need to ask you something."

**

Matt clenched his jaw, standing up and walking over to the window. He had a feeling he knew where this was going, bracing himself for any reaction Noah might have. Light blankets of rain coated the ground, a cool gust of wind coming from the shattered block in the window. He leaned down, picking up a large rock, smoothing his thumb over the surface.

"It wasn't an aneurysm." Noah said, his voice shaking.

Matt glanced at him, quickly looking away.

"It wasn't."

Noah shook his head, scoffing.

"Don't," Matt snapped, spinning on his heel to glare at Noah. "Do not act like I've somehow hurt or inconvenienced you. You think I found you on accident? That I just heard about your story and thought I'd like to be your friend? No. No, I heard a story about a kid whose friend died and the news was blaming him. I heard how that same kid had a twin sister who died from an aneurysm at eight years old. I don't know why, Noah, but I knew that we were alike. That's why I'm here."

Noah's head spun with questions, and with just as much annoyance, burning inside from Matt's lie.

"What took him?" he asked, a darkness in his eyes he couldn't seem to shake despite knowing that he had no reason to be angry. His stomach felt like fury and his fingers like knives, digging them into his palms, opening the flesh and gritting his teeth to stifle the pain.

"I have no fucking idea. But I saw it. I saw it too many times."

Matt leaned onto the bricks, resting his head on them. "I was fifteen when I first met the darkness. At first it was just my mind, this incessant pulling at me. And I couldn't ever get it to stop."

Noah pulled himself onto a pew, looking at his lap while he listened to Matt's story.

"And then, I mean, what happens next? What happens when you can't shake the dark? You just indulge. So I did. Pills, you know. I remember I'd zone out so hard I'd miss entire conversations, meetings, classes. I'd go to school and they'd slap a test in front of me and I couldn't even read the first question. I didn't care."

Matt walked over, sitting next to Noah. He ran a hand over his face, taking a breath before continuing.

"I can play violin and drums...like, really well. I wasn't in concert band at school, but I was in a band, and they wound up kicking my ass to the curb. I wasn't me anymore...and it wasn't pills anymore." His eyes welled up, clenching tight to stop the flow. He swallowed hard, his voice wavering.

"One night, I got home from some guy's house, couldn't tell you who, and the next thing I know, I'm laying on the garage floor. Fucking blue. Body like an icicle. And Vinny's sitting next to me, screaming for mom. He's got the house phone in his hand, crying so hard...I don't even think the dispatcher understood him. And I look over, and he's got his hand pressed to my arm, there's fucking barf just...and mom runs in, screaming, she's crying, turning me on my side. And I just see a needle, and blood, and vomit, and then nothing."

Noah sighed, his eyes wide, scrubbing his face with both hands. Matt held up a finger, gathering himself.

"When I woke up in the hospital, Vinny was sleeping in a chair, sitting up. Mom wasn't in the room. But something else was. I thought I was hallucinating, you know? But I wasn't. It just closed its hands around Vinny's face, and I tried to scream, I tried to move, but it was like I was stuck. Frozen in place. I just watched this darkness seep into him."

"It couldn't have been-"

"It was. I didn't even struggle in rehab. Didn't go through withdrawal. It was all just...gone. But I swear to you, I didn't know. I didn't know that what I saw was real," Matt started shaking, whimpering. Noah raised an eyebrow, slowly putting a hand on Matt's back.

“Do you think it’s my fault?”

**

Yes, like it’s my fault. Yes, like the sound of Jane’s whistle, like the sound of Vinny’s scream, yes, like the way we failed them. Yes, like the way they burn us, living in our veins, breathing tar and wax and boiling sludge into our lungs. Yes, it’s your fucking fault.

“No.”

Because he’s my friend, somehow, despite not knowing him. Despite the way he always shows up when I don’t want him. Because he’s the only thing I have, and that has to mean something.

I don’t know how to console people. Put your hand on their back, right, Like in movies and at funerals. I swear I have a scar in the shape of a collective handprint on my back from Jane’s funeral. How can you say sorry when you can’t form words? How can you say thank you when you don’t know what it means? God, I feel like I’m just treading water.

I wonder if Matt feels the same way. Maybe he never knows what to say to me, too. Nah, he has things together. He survived, which is better than I’m doing.

**

After a long silence, Matt pulled his coat on, yawning.

“Go home, Noah. Reconvene in a few days.”

He slipped out the door, walking into the rain.

** FOUR YEARS AGO **

“Now, would anyone like to share?”

The room was quiet, seven folding chairs circled around a small table with a rubber stress ball sitting on it. Six teenagers who had nothing to say, or who didn’t want to say it - one of them who, for the first time ever, sat with a smile on his face.

“I’ll go.”

Noah reached to the stress ball, tossing it in the air.

“Fantastic, Noah.We have yet to hear from you.”

“I don’t like talking about Jane very often. But today is our birthday.”

A young girl around fourteen peeked her head up and smiled. “Happy birthday, Noah and Jane!”

“Thanks, Anya.”

“What would you like to share with us?” Ripley asked, folding his hands over the round of his belly.

Noah shrugged, pondering. Anya perked up, straightening herself in her chair. “How about what she was like?”

Noah sighed, grinning. “She was so much fun. A real brat, but fun. Jane always knew the best games, she always took lead and gave everyone roles that actually fit them. Like, I could run, but I wasn’t a good kicker. So when we’d play kickball, she always said it was only fair if our friend Dan kicked the ball and I ran for him.”

“She sounds nice!” Anya said, chewing on the sleeve of her jacket. “My sister was always the leader, too.”

“She was nice. She was funny, too. She always had something sassy to say.”

“How old were you? You know…”

“Anya, is that very considerate to ask?” Ripley said, raising an eyebrow to her.

“I’m sorry, Noah.”

“It’s alright. We were eight.”

“It’s not very fair that you didn’t get to know her for long, is it? My sister was almost twenty when she died. I had my whole life to know her… You only had eight years.”

“Anya, please-”

“Really, doc. It’s all good. You’re right, it isn’t fair. I just try and keep in mind that while I didn’t have very long with her… We had a lot of memories. Those memories can’t ever run out, even if I remember them a hundred times. Because Jane is always in here,” he said, pointing to a space above his heart. “Our twin cradle.”

“That’s a load of shit.” A tall boy about Noah’s age piped up, rolling his eyes. “Nothing is in that twin cradle. Know why? Because she died. Her end of the cradle will always be empty.”

“David, I think you should apologize to Noah. It is not our place to correct someone or project our emotions onto them, especially when it comes to grief.”

“Why? I’m not sorry. Do you think my brother is in there? He died five years ago. Identical twins. Do I feel him? Not a chance. My twin space? Cold and empty, because he’s dead. Sitting around singing campfire songs isn’t going to help him come back. Noah, I thought you might be the only other person in this group that knew that. Guess I was wrong.”

“I’m trying to honor Jane and this is the only way I know how to, Dave. I don’t think this will bring her back…but I do think it’ll keep her memory alive.”

David scowled, crossing his arms. He stood up and walked out of the room, mumbling under his breath.

**PRESENT DAY**

“Go home, Noah. Reconvene in a few days.”

A few days…right.

I’m not leaving yet, I don’t really want to deal with what’s bound to be waiting for me at home. Home. Supposed to be warm, supposed to be safe. Have I ever had a place like that? Not since Jane. Maybe one day, that’ll change. Maybe I can create my own home. But for now? Sleep.

–

“Hey!” someone is whispering, loud, like they’re right in my ear. It’s so dark I can’t even see my hand outstreched in front of me, let alone anyone or anything else.

“Noah!”

“Who-”

“It’s me!”

A flicker, like a match being lit, far away. It’s like a small orb floating in the distance, but the voice is all around me. I guess I’m meant to follow it. I swear I’ve heard this voice before, I swear -

“I have to show you.” Vinny, reaching to touch my forehead, and it’s like a warm apple cider, tangy and sweet, filling my body, darkness going dim, light surrounding me.

I’m standing in a living room. What the hell?

“Vinny, go get your brother.”

It’s like time is jumping, skipping, warping, Matt’s mother walking by is more like a phantom, like a fast forward button, pausing briefly. Vinny runs out of his room, winter hat on his head, dancing down the hallway.

“Mattie!”

“I’m coming!” Matt’s younger, looks like he’s still in high school, two drumsticks sticking out of his back pocket. “Hey, wait, Vin! Got your lunch?”

Vinny turns, nodding, moving his arms like a worm as he wiggles out the front door. Matt’s mom is laughing, pulling him into a hug before he grabs his keys and leaves, too.

Things are rushing, like speed mode, distorted fragments of conversations like a boomerang around my head. And then it stops.

Vinny skips into another room, Matt’s voice comes from there, too. Guess that’s where I need to be.

“I’ll bring you whatever you want,” Matt’s saying, putting his same leather wallet into his jean pocket. “Skittles? Gushers? Dr. Pepper?” His room is weirdly clean for a teenager, but maybe that’s why he thinks I live in a dump.

“Okay. Can I sleep in here?”

“Why?”

Vinny shrugs. “Dunno. I like it more.”

“Are you having nightmares again?”

“Sometimes…but that’s not why I wanna sleep in here. Deal?”

“Deal. You sleep in here, you don’t mention that I’m out to mom or Pete.”

Matt grabs his keys and slides the window open, slinking out. You can hear him make his way down the gutter, jumping off with a thud.

Vinny runs out of the room, closing the door behind him. Now I guess I’m stuck in Matt’s room? I’m not corporeal. Vinny as I met him, again, standing in front of me. He’s pointing at the door, and it opens. He’s gone.

Things warp, time speeding up again, a loud bang breaks the jump. It’s so dark it’s hard to see. Where’s Vinny? His room? Empty. Matt’s room. He wanted to sleep there. But the door is closed? Sounds like…shuffling…in another room.

“No! No! Please don’t do this, please, I-”

But I can’t get there fast enough.There’s a man, Pete, I think - standing over Matt’s mother’s body, a single gunshot, and now..blood. So, so much fucking blood. For fucks sake, what?

Pete is storming out of the room, staring at himself in a mirror above the mantle. I can’t let him get Vinny.

Speaking of Vinny, he’s in the hall, opening the door before he’s gone again.

He’s hiding under Matt’s bed, stuffing papers into a panel on the floor. What is that? Not important. I have to find a way to get Vinny to safety. Come on, come on, I can’t get this fucking window open!

No, no, no, no, no, this can’t happen. Matt said it was the darkness that took Vinny, there’s no way - open, you fucker!

A glitch in time, seriously? Another bang. Vinny?

Oh my god. Oh my god.

–

*SIX YEARS AGO*

Matt gripped onto a window ledge, climbing his way up the gutter. He shoved the window open, jumping in through the window. The room is dark, the scent of metal in the air.

“Ew, what the hell?”

Matt clicked the side button on his phone, the light illuminating his face as he switched the flashlight on.

At the sight, he fell backwards, struggling to breathe. And then, after he caught his breath, he saw crimson against his eyes, not the blood on the walls or the floor, but rage, pure and unwavering, as he ran out of his room and to his mother’s.

A single gasp of terror, his head spinning, no trace of his step father amongst the remains of his mother and brother. And then the scent of sulfur, a boiling hot wave of fear, Matt holding himself up along the wall, finding Pete staring into the mirror above the mantle. All in a moment, Matt’s eyes widened, a shudder of a shake in his head.

“No…”

The reflection of his step father swirled in black, smoking tendrils crawling into his eyes and mouth, the sulfuric cloud making Matt choke as he stifled a gag. He watched Peter’s eyes glaze over as he raised his hand and - gone.

“Gone. Gone. Gone. Gone.” Matt repeated, collapsing before rocking himself back and forth with his arms wrapped around his knees. “Gone.”

**

“See?” Vinny’s whispering to me, pointing under the bed. “I have to show you.”

I’m nodding, and then everything dissipates, leaving me in the dark again.

–

“Noah, wake up.”

Katai is standing over me, holding the sides of my face.

“Katai, I have so much to-”

“WAKE UP!”

**

Noah heaved awake, his eyes jolting to the altar, where Vinny’s phantom stood.

He approached him, kneeling to his height, tears welling in his eyes.

“Vinny, I’m so sorry that happened to you.”

“Help him,” Vinny whispered, hugging Noah before fading, trickles of light left where he’d stood.

“How?”

A loud clank came from the west side of the church, Noah craned his neck to see the source of the sound. Matt lodged a chunk of wood against the door, looking up when he saw Noah.

“When did you get here?”

“What? I stayed the night when you left yesterday.”

“Noah..I haven’t been here in three days.”

**

Maybe I should be more concerned with having lost three days and wow, what the fuck? But I’m standing here, looking at Matt, the image of him finding Vinny burned into my head. I can’t believe I ever thought he didn’t know what he was talking about. I can’t believe I got so pissed off at him for not telling me.

Why the fuck am I like this? Hug him.

“You solid?”

Hug him. Say you’re sorry. Tell him you know. Hug him. Hug him.

“Noah? Is everything okay?”

And I’m hugging him, I can basically feel him looking at me like I’m fucking insane. Maybe I am. Maybe that’s exactly why we get each other.

**

Matt’s face turned in confusion, but after a second he just accepted it, hugging Noah back.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Matt stepped back, rubbing his temples.

“What?”

“I didn’t mean that, I-” Noah turned away, slinking over to sit on the pew. “Hold on. It’s been three days?”

“Yeah, has it not been for you?”

“No, I just slept and woke up and now…Matt, what happened to your mom’s house?”

“What? Why?”

“This is going to sound bizarre, but please just…I’m sorry. About being such an asshole. I know what happened to Vinny, your mom…Pete. I know you found them. I know.”

“Noah-”

“We have to go back.”

“…To my mom’s? How did you even…Vinny. He told you, didn’t he?”

“He showed me. And yes, your mom’s. Do you trust me?”

“As much as I probably shouldn’t, yeah, I do.”

Noah pulled his jacket on, walking over to the door.

“Now?” Matt asked, buttoning his coat. Noah nodded, and with Matt leading the way, they walked into the night.

–

Turning onto the street, Matt pulled out a ring of keys, running his thumb over the teeth of one specifically.

“I don’t know why I kept it,” he said, turning his head for Noah to better hear him.

“I used to come here to feel closer to Vinny. Now…it’s just rust.”

“And cobwebs.” Noah added, shuffling his feet along the sidewalk.

“Yeah. Those too.”

Matt nodded toward an old house, shingles falling apart, more decrepit than Noah expected after seeing the inside. Time’s most tragic and beautiful gift. Decay.

Inside, moonlight washed over the coffee table, a harsh, lingering smell of mildew in the air. Everything remained as it was, apart from the mirror above the mantle, which was now shattered, pieces having rained across the floor. Matt noticed Noah’s pondering stare, rolling up his coat sleeve to reveal a scar along his knuckles. Noah nodded, understanding.

Turning toward the rooms, they both stopped short, a figure standing midway through the hallway. It was still, a mess of rot and dirt, like thick, webbed membrane, gray and dry.

“Ignore it,” Matt said, pulling Noah’s sleeve toward his old room.

“Right, ignore it.” Easier said than done.

**

The thing in the hallway growls as we pass it, almost like a threat. Good thing I don’t give a fuck about threats anymore.

Matt’s room looks exactly the same, only difference is the blood has been scrubbed away. I kneel down, reaching under the bed, but the panel is too far away.

“Help me push it?”

We shove the bed against the wall, Matt’s standing there watching me as I move the wood and grab a stack of papers. There’s also a bracelet, one of those plastic ones you braid together at camp or something, and a figurine of a dinosaur. I hold it out to Matt, but he just takes the dinosaur, almost starts to cry.

I toss the rest onto the bed, slowing sorting through papers, which mostly consisted of awards from school. 100% on a spelling test. Perfect attendance. Best Hall Monitor of the year. And then there’s a letter, and a folded up piece of construction paper.

I’ll open the letter first, read it out.

‘Dear Matteo aka Matt aka Mattie,

I can’t believe you’re already graduating high school. Then you’re gonna go to college, and you’re gonna move away. I hope I get your room! JK. I just want to say thanks for being the best big brother. You were always there for me, especially during the times where I didn’t feel like I was very smart or cool enough. Thanks for just listening. Thanks for being my brother. Maybe I don’t tell you enough but I really do love you. Good job graduating.

Love,

Your brother Vincenzo aka Vinny’

Matt is gripping the dinosaur, tears staining his cheeks, his chest shuddering with his breaths.

“Can I?” He’s asking, and I’m handing him the letter. Fuck. Of course he can.

Now I’ve got the construction paper in my hand, unfolding it. Jane used to make these fortune tellers with Ava, folding the paper like this one is. I wonder if all kids did this. Maybe it’s just an anomaly, just our siblings did it. Who knows.

It’s a scribbled crayon drawing of Vinny, standing on something? And next to him is a little girl, blue dress, long red hair. Are they….is this the church? This isn’t possible. This can’t be real. Matt’s looking over my shoulder, I can feel him breathing on my neck.

“What the fuck is this?!” I turn, shoving the paper at him, but he’s not there, he’s standing to the side of me, still crying with the letter clutched to his chest.

“What?” Matt says, I’m turning back to him, thrusting my arm over to hand him the paper.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. My head is full of pressure, like it’s about to pop and shatter like that god damn mirror. A loud screech, a jolt, the hallway figure appears in front of us and pins Matt to the wall, gripping his throat. Red and black burns appear under its fingers, Matt’s screaming in pain, but doesn’t look away. He’s staring straight into it, his face twisted like he’s just stared into the eye of Hell.

 I don’t know what to do, so I just -

“No! Jane, STOP!”

The figure turns, dropping him to the ground, cocks its head at me. It laughs, growls,

“It’s not Jane,” Matt chokes, trying to slide up the wall into a seated position. He’s doubled over, coughing up black ash, the figure crumbling into bone fragments and gray, lava like gooey shit.

“Who was it, Matt?!”

“Noah, I…it was you.”

•

Disclaimer : Characters I own are Matt Pivouz, Vinny Trovato, Lucia and Peter Trovato, Ula Santiago, Dr. Ripley, David, Anya, and Remy. I do not own the others. I’ve added a bit of a flare to them for the sake of this piece, but they do not belong to me.

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