#and yeah mike gets a shit ton of hate for the way he acted on s3 ((which still is bad bc it's most likely due to internalized homophobia

[mike-haters-dni]

So while I'm Saying Shit, I also have a problem with this idea that El was upset that Mike wasn't saying I love you specifically because her love language is words of affirmation so she really needed to hear it? I mean, first of all I think the idea of love languages is mostly useful as a quick generalized way to discuss how we respond to and express affection—a messy nuanced human behavior thing that is hard to talk about, and the show is written with that nuance, but even then I don't think El particularly craves or requires words to feel loved anymore than anyone else does. I think in s4 she was really just confused about why her boyfriend was refusing to say the word 'love' under any circumstance to her? Especially after she heard him say it once already and then she said it back to his face in response so its like, he said he loves me before and I let him know I feel the same and now he won't say it again? Not even as a way to end letters—a normal thing people do for someone who means much less to them than she supposedly does to him sooooooooooo like what's the fucking deal? The contents of the letters sure implies he holds a lot of affection for her and he brings her flowers in her favorite colors and ok we're in love and then he signs 'from' on the card and its like ????? like even as the audience you're supposed to be confused lol like he clearly has some kind of hang up I wonder what it is? Then after El smashes a girl's face in she thinks "oh yeah, the hang up is that he actually hates me because I'm evil haha lemme just start projecting real quick" and then, you know, s4 happens. I mean, it's not like she doesn't value words at all, I just don't think her relationship to them is particularly tied to her trauma like people say, or if anything, maybe she values them less because that's all Brenner would ever give her? Like, perhaps the big Love Confession hits the hardest because it came after Mike and company spent a week or whatever driving across the entire western united states to save her from the government. Idk, something to chew on.

Honestly, if anyone's love language is words its Mike lmao he's the one whos constantly telling El how amazing she is. He's also desperately trying to tell her he loves her in like 5 scenes (arguably succeeding except for not saying the actual word in most of them) before he actually does like, he wants to so bad it almost comes spilling out of his mouth against his will (except for that one time it does ha) he's just terrified of doing so because it would essentially be ripping his entire beating heart out of his chest and handing it to this powerful-in-every-way girl on a silver platter for her to do whatever she wants with—like crushing it into a fine paste in front of his eyes, killing him instantly and preventing him from having the strength to love anything ever again. Like, the other half of the love language thing is that you also speak the love language, meaning you are more likely to show affection by doing the thing you want for other people, and Mike does this waaaaay more than El does for anyone actually (something I would love to see her do more in s5 lowkey. Like, she was at a severe disadvantage before and was too busy dealing with her own shit to have a ton of emotional energy for anyone else so it makes sense, but we're matured now. I think now is the time for a heart-to-heart that goes both ways u kno).

If I wanted to be cute, I could argue that both Mike and El's main love language is actually acts of service. They're both little heroes who jump at the chance to do anything for the people they love with no regard for their own personal wellbeing. Also, adorably, the thing that gets them back together in s3 is Mike saving El from Billy, which El responds to by helping him and Lucas with the vending machine. One offering of m&ms later and we're back baybee it's the quiet understanding that no matter what they'll always be there for each other for meeee

If I'm not being cute I'm saying the idea that everyone has a main 'love language' is bullshit and you're gonna appreciate different things at different times and people are not that easily categorized but it's still a good jumping off point for discussion so—

Anyway El saves the world and Mike saves her and they're dying in each other's arms thank you for your time <3

[lover-of-mine]

I'mma defend Mike Wheeler here for a second because I have more thoughts. Mike has been consistently shown as someone that's ignored, that starts on the get go when his mother doesn't notice they were playing for 10 hours, as someone that loves to be needed, he constantly swoops in, and as someone that has no idea how to handle big emotions. He explodes at El when he thinks she lied about Will still being alive, he explodes at Lucas for saying El is a traitor. He, along with everyone else, was never allowed to process the trauma he went through, he saw his best friend body, he was attacked by interdimensional monsters, he saw the girl he liked disappear in a cloud of light and smoke. S2 Mike is traumatized enough to call someone he thinks is dead for a year. He is mean to Max because of what happened to them. But he is also extremely soft with Will because he lost Will once and Will needs him at that moment and being needed is how he distracts himself from the shit he been through. That's the same thing he does with El in S3. It's why he busts that love confession that way. And he was right. They were treating El like a machine and she did lose her power. S4, he just lost his best friend and his girlfriend in one swoop. And you can't exactly blame him for being focused on his gf when he sees them again. And Will is dealing with his own set of big emotions there. And he did apologize to Will. Like he did in s3. That's more than Eleven gets in s1. It's more than Max gets in s2. And ignoring the full body sobs is weird but again he doesn't know how to deal with big emotions and Will definitely gave him something big to think about. And the speech to El. At that moment El needs him. More than she ever did. She needs reassuring and by reminding them both of they day they met he is reminding her of the first time someone was genuinely kind to her. He's definitely not thinking about how he's "hUrTInG WiLl's fEeLinGs" El is trying to save half their friends. El is trying to save his fucking sister. He's saying what El needs to hear the same way he was saying what Will needed to hear when he was flayed. He consistently does what going to help immediately. He consistently help his loved one that needs him the most at the moment. He's not big on thinking about consequences for the future.

[mabelmidnight-takeover]

they were so explicit with lucas' motives to try to become popular but people still took it and put it against him 🥴🥴

[troquantary]

Edward Cullen: That Boy Ain’t Right

So I was doing a reread of @therealvinelle 's collection of Twilight metas, as one does, and in "Edward, Denial, and a Human Girlfriend" she mentions that she doesn't believe Edward is sane. I thought, "ha, yeah, he's definitely not," and also, "but wait, what does that mean exactly, please say more about that." But since she's already inundated with asks, I've decided to use my own head-muscle and explore this idea. (TL;DR: I start out more or less organized, synthesize some points Vinelle has made across several posts (and have hopefully linked to them all where relevant but please tell me if not), touch a little on narcissism, then take a hard left into the negative effects of being a telepath.)

Just a couple things to note at the outset, though. Theses have been written already (probably) about Edward as an abuser. Edward being insane doesn't negate that at all; he's definitely an asshole and just...a disaster of a human being. (I find it more funny than anything, but YMMV.) I'm also going to try to avoid talking specifically about mental illness and how it relates (or doesn't relate) to abusive behavior -- that's territory I'm not really equipped to discuss, like at all. My starting point is "Edward has a deeply warped perception of reality," not "Edward has X disorder."

So: deeply warped perception of reality. The evidence? Goes behind a cut, because my one character trait is Verbose.

Vinelle provides a great example of it in the post linked above, which I'll just quote because she does words good: "[Edward] keeps acting like his romance with Bella is a romantic tragedy, and all the cast of Twilight are actors on a stage making it as sublime as possible." Edward's the one to pursue Bella, but he does so with the full belief, from the very beginning, that it will never last; Bella will "outgrow" him, go on her human way, and he can spend the rest of eternity brooding magnificently over his too-short romantic bliss. [Insert premature ejaculation joke.] Turning her is never an option, even though Alice, Noted Psychic, says that romancing Bella will either end with her dead (exsanguinated) or dead (vampire).

This framing, where he's a dark anti-hero in love with -- but never tainting! -- the pure maiden and eventually leaving her in a grand, tragic sacrifice to preserve her soul? It's fucking bonkers. Bella isn't a person to him in this scenario. As Vinelle points out, Bella's never really a person to him at all; he falls in love with his own mental construct, cherry-picking from what he observes of her behavior and her responses to his 20 (thousand) Questions to convince himself that she is the ideal woman.

Bella's not the only one who gets the projection/cardboard-cutout treatment. Edward sees everything and everyone through a highly particular, personalized lens. He filters his entire reality, which we all do to an extent, but the thing with Edward is that he starts with his conclusions and then only pays attention to the evidence that supports those conclusions. Often that evidence consists of what he admits in New Moon are only "surface" thoughts -- but recognizing that limitation doesn't keep him from taking those thoughts as representative of what people are. Edward then becomes absolutely convinced by his own "reasoning" and won't be swayed from what he has decided is Objectively True. It's obvious with Bella; it's also painfully obvious with Rosalie. (Vinelle explains this and brings up Edward's raging Madonna/Whore complex in the same post, so refer to that again -- she's right.)

He also catastrophizes. Everything. Bella's just vibing in her room, rereading Wuthering Heights for the 87th time? She's gonna be hit by a meteor, better sneak into her room while she sleeps. Bella's going to the beach with the filthy mundanes their human classmates? She's gonna fall in the ocean. Jasper's cannibal pals are stopping by for a visit, but know not to hunt in the area? DISASTER, DEFCON 1, ALSO FUCK YOU JASPER FOR EVEN EXISTING IN MY AND BELLA'S SPHERE YOU UNSPEAKABLE BURDEN. Edward must believe that Bella is vulnerable and in near-constant peril, to support the reality he has created in which he is the villain turned protector and maybe?? hero??? (!!!) for his beloved. So when the actual, James-shaped danger arrives, he goes berserk, snarling and flipping his shit and generally not helping the situation. His fantasy demands that Bella remain human, so instead of doing the very thing Alice, Noted Psychic, assures him will neutralize the threat (and not just a threat to Bella, either, but to Bella's family and any other human James might decide to include in the "game"), he vetoes it immediately, no discussion. Bella Must Not Turn, and he sticks to those guns despite James nearly reducing her to ground beef, despite leaving Bella catatonic with depression (but human! success!) in New Moon, despite Aro's order and his family's vote and, let's not forget, Bella's clearly and repeatedly stated desire to be a vampire. It's going to happen. But he doesn't accept it until Renesmee busts out of Bella like the Kool-Aid man and the poor girl's heart finally, unequivocally stops.

Sane people don't behave this way. I don't want to slap labels on Edward, but I can't help but note that he comes across as highly narcissistic. He's the only real person in his universe, the lone player among us NPCs. That probably has a lot to do with him being frozen in the mindset and maturity of a seventeen-year-old boy, but I think it's also just...him, on some fundamental level. His failure to connect with others and recognize them as full, independent beings with their own wants and priorities isn't like Bella's failure -- she's badly depressed. Edward is...something else, and I get the sense that his sanity has been steadily deteriorating over time. And a cursory google of narcissistic traits turns up some familiar-looking stuff. He's self-loathing, yes, but also grandiose; he hates himself for the monster he is (and hates most vampires besides Esme and Carlisle for their monstrosity, too) but still feels superior to humans, to the extent that he felt entitled to human blood and resented Carlisle for depriving him of his "proper" diet. He eventually returns to Carlisle, but he's far from content -- the beginning of Midnight Sun finds him in a state of ennui, bored and dismissive of (if not outright disgusted by) everyone around him, that has apparently persisted for years and years. He doesn't play the piano, he doesn't compose, he doesn't enjoy anything...at least until Bella comes along and then he becomes obsessed to a disturbing degree with her and his new, romantic tragedy spin on reality.

[Next-day edit: I’m not sure where else to fit this in, but the way Edward casually contemplates violence against people who have, at best, mildly annoyed him is...chilling. I have a hard time writing off his strategizing how to murder the entire Biology class as a result of bloodlust -- it’s so calculated, nothing like the blackout state of thirst Emmett describes when he encountered his own “singer,” and that is probably the default for when a vampire is extremely thirsty. But even ignoring the Biology class incident, Edward still does things like consider, with disturbing frequency, how he might grievously injure or kill Mike Newton, all because...Edward considers him his romantic rival (despite Bella barely giving the kid the time of day). He thinks about slapping Mike through a wall, which might be an amusing slapstick image, except as a vampire Edward’s actually capable of turning this boy’s skeleton to a fine powder. So it’s, y’know, kind of sick when you think about it.

But even worse than that, when Bella tells Edward about how she flirted with Jacob to get at that sweet, sweet vampire lore, Edward chuckles and then, after dropping Bella home, flippantly observes that now that the treaty’s broken, why not genocide? I’m not even kidding, it’s right there in Midnight Sun; he seriously thinks about the fact that he’d be technically justified now in wiping out the entire tribe because a teenager tried to impress a girl with a spooky story. That is fucked. Remember, Edward was there with Carlisle when the treaty was first established. He knows how remarkable it is that they even came to a truce in the first place, that it was only ever possible because Carlisle is...well, Carlisle, and that it marks a pretty significant moment in supernatural history. He doesn’t care; he doesn’t respect it, or he’d never think something like “Ha ha, if I went and killed them all, I wouldn’t even be wrong. I mean, I won’t do it, but I’m just saying, I wouldn’t be wrong.”

Again: not the thought process or behavior of a sane person. (Or a person that respects life in general -- sorry Carlisle, big L.)]

Finally, whether he's a narcissist or not, I think the fact that Edward has constant, unavoidable access to everyone's thoughts is a powerful contributing factor to his instability. He can tune out the mental noise to an extent, but he can't stop it -- so he comes to rely on it like another sense. This causes issues with disconnect and lack of empathy, of course, but there's another facet to this shit diamond: he's basically experiencing a ceaseless flow of intrusive thoughts. His narration in Midnight Sun suggests that he "hears" the words people think, can "see" what they visualize in their mind's eye, and can sense the emotional "tone" and intensity of their thoughts. Therefore, perceiving Jasper's thirst through his thoughts makes Edward more aware of his own, "doubling" the discomfort. This would be a lot to deal with even from just his immediate coven members, but Edward gets all of this pouring into his head like a firehose on a day-to-day basis because the Cullens live right alongside humans. I know Meyerpires have galaxy brains or whatever, but that's a ton to process.

Besides the compounding effect on his own thirst when he "feels" the thirst of others, Meyer never suggests that Edward has difficulty separating his own thoughts from other people's; even when he was newly turned, he recognized Carlisle's "voice" in his head as Carlisle's. That would create a whole different host of issues around identity, but it looks like Edward's escaped that particular torment. However, I can easily imagine that what he does experience is just shy of unbearable nonetheless, with an eroding effect on his sanity over decades. He can't sleep to escape it; he's on a dishwater diet and probably (like the rest of his family) experiencing a perpetual, low-grade physical discomfort due to his thirst never being fully satisfied; and he's around far more people than is the norm for vampires -- even discounting all the humans, his own coven is unusually large -- meaning more noise.

Honestly, it would be weirder if he were all there, considering.

And even though I feel like I lost a sense of structure around where I started ranting about telepathy, I've written like 1.5k words about Edward fucking Cullen and I think that's enough for one post.

[n04hw4sg4y]

I feel like Mike gets way too much hate, so here is this, that I've been thinking about.

Season 1: His literal best friend goes missing, he does everything he can to find him, including letting a random girl from the woods stay in his house because he thinks she can help him find Will. Then he finds out he is dead. He refuses to believe it and continues searching no matter what. He has to cope with the revelation that an entire different fucking dimension exists, and that Demogorgons are real. He even has to run away form them. Oh! He also has to run away from a weird organization to hide the strange girl. He thinks he might like the strange girl. Oh shit, she vanishes in front of his eyes while fighting a fucking monster. At least he has his best friend back, right!!

Season 2: Yeah, no. His best friend has all these weird visions of the alternate dimension he was stuck in for a week. At least they're crazy together :). Yeah well, in one of those visions his best friend gets infiltrated by a fucking big ass mind flayer shadow monster. They discover weird underground tunnels in hawkins. They try to burn them because they're from the alternate dimension. Ah shit, his best friend is burning too. So they're connected. They try to find out what is going on with Will. He seems to be getting worse and worse, his memory dwindling. His best friend finds a solution. Oh shit, the mind flayer is spying back, the solution is a trap. No one believes him. The entire lab gets infiltrated by Demodogs, his best friend is completely possessed and he has to listen to him screaming as his mom sedates him. They somehow make it out of the lab. They have to get info out of Will, so he has to talk to his possessed friend to get that info. Ah shit, they're running away again. Oh, did i mention? The girl he's been trying to contact for like half a year, after seeing her vanish, has lived the whole time and was being kept hidden. Shit happens. They manage to get the mind flayer out of Will, and El closes the gate. Cool!!

I am not about to do Season 3 and 4 too, you get the point. Mike has spent years having to constantly worry about not only him dying, but also the people around him. Especially the two people who he loves most. His best friend who he possibly is in love with, and his girlfriend, who he's been through so much with. And he can do nothing. He tries to help, but truly, he can't. They don't need him. So he is left to worry that they both will eventually realize that they don't, and leave him. Mike Wheeler is a helpless 15 year old, who has a shit ton of trauma. Who has to also deal with his feelings for his girlfriend and his best friend. He pushes people away, so they don't do it to him first.

Stop acting like Mike is a monster. He is dealing with a lot, and his worst fears are coming true over and over again. The people he loves are constantly in danger, and they don't need him. They can do it on their own. All he wants is to protect them, and he can't even do that.

Also, he most likely has an insane amount of internalized homophobia.

The way he acts in season 4 comes from that. From that fear of losing people. From that fear of them being in danger. From that confusion of his own feelings. From all that trauma. No one cares bout any of it.

Mike Wheeler, I love you, and I think you're great.

I've done this all from memory so some parts might be wrong, but I think my point is clear.

And yes, this does not excuse the fact that he treats Will badly. That he pushes him away and ignores him. But I think he does because he loves him, and is scared. He does because he just wants to feel normal, to live normal. He does it because when he has a break from worrying about everything, he doesn't know what to do with himself. Who to pay attention to. His brain functions on the thought "Pay attention to whoever is in danger." And when neither Will or Eleven are in danger, he's confused. Plus again, Eleven is his safety. Through her he can pretend that he is straight. And he cares a lot about her. So maybe he also misinterprets these feelings as romantic when he's platonically attached.

Idk, I have a lot of thoughts on him, and I'm not sure if any of this made sense, but I felt like it needed to be said. I will defend Mike Wheeler always.

[doyelikehaggis]

it is late at night and i am sad about ryan. again

i just. how does everyone hate him as much as they do. like they tolerate him most of the time but the second it comes down to the wire they all hate him and it’s not even justified? like yeah, he’s not exactly the best person and he can be manipulative but so can everyone else? especially floss, who is a ton less justified in acting like that and definitely old enough to know better by later seasons, yet she gets away with everything and he doesn’t. it just pisses me off so much

and he helps everyone out too? not always in return for anything, and even if it was in return for stuff, that’s exactly how everyone else operates?? but like, he helps out the people who are nice to him (and chloe). and everyone still acts as if he’s this terrible person who screws everyone over, ruins everything, manipulates everyone and never does anything kind. and he gets blamed for everything when 9 times out of 10, it’s floss or taz

and don’t get me started on how much the way chloe acts towards him annoys me. “unfortunate to have a brother who’s ryan”, in her own words. and he’s still good to her as much as he can be

in summary ryan is unfairly painted as a much worse person than he is, chloe is actually kinda a bitch (but don’t get me wrong, i love her anyway), floss is terrible, and the whole ‘the real ryan’ thing from his leaving episode is a cheap excuse to not have to address how unfairly the narrative treated him for the last 5 seasons

It’s always sad about Ryan hours over here, you are in good company. 

I will never be able to understand why Ryan is treated as if he’s, well, in Sasha’s words: “seriously disturbed.” They literally act like he’s done horrible, unforgivable things and cannot be trusted for anything. I think the worst thing he actually did that I can remember is getting Mike suspended. It was obviously wrong, but no one even really tried to figure out why he did it? No one ever really checks in on him, or stops for a second when he does something wrong to ask him, gently, why he did it and hear him out without getting mad at him straight away. He’s a kid who’s been through a lot, and that doesn’t necessarily justify doing bad things, but the bad things he’s done are about as bad as the rest of them! Honestly, getting Mike suspended wasn’t even that bad! Because, funnily enough, had Carmen not gotten so pissed off at Mike and told the police her file was missing, Mike wouldn’t have been suspended at all. The blame is on Mike in that situaiton for taking the file home with him. Not Carmen and not Ryan. 

And yeah, he’s a manipulative little shit, like when he altered those voice recordings of Tee to turn the others on her. Which... is almost similar to something Elektra has done before. And Floss, in fact, who more recently blackmailed one of the younger ones into helping her betray his friend. 

If there was a single thing that Ryan had done that none of the other characters had done before, I’d maybe understand. Something truly fucked up that is just a little bit more worrying than anything anyone else has done. But I have nothing. 

Stealing the computer and letting Tyler go down for it? Carmen let Bailey get arrested for the window she smashed. Elektra got the younger ones to steal money for her. Dexter stole that parcel and Sasha was going to let Jody go down for it. 

Going through everyone’s files? Elektra, again. And I think Johnny did as well at one point? I don’t quite remember that one too well, but he is absolutely not the first or last to betray the privacy of the other residents, yet he’s treated like he is. 

He is constantly mean and manipulative because everyone keeps telling him he’s evil and disturbed and that he’s a horrible person who only ever lies. And he’s been told that since an age where he wasn’t even old enough to understand why he was being called all of these things. He grew up accepting it about himself and thinking it must be true, because everyone says it, and no one ever listens to him. 

He tried his best to be a good brother to Chloe, and she still acted like he really did let her fall out that window. I don’t understand her turning on him so easily. 

A specific episode that hurts? The halloween one, when Sasha and Tee decide it would be really funny to make him believe that a woman died in his room and is now haunting it. He was absolutely terrified, shaking and on the verge of crying, and they still went along with it (Tee was reluctant, that’s something, I guess, but she didn’t stop Sasha). 

Ryan is definitely unfairly painted as much worse than the others, Chloe could definitely have been nicer, I actually really don’t like Floss, and and I agree that the way they “wrapped up” his story was not at all satisfying. 

[your-asks]

Thank you so much for sending this in! It was a ton of fun to write.

———

Chris felt overwhelmed. But that was becoming a regular thing for him.

He sat up in his bed, pushing his sheets down to his waist. He spent a lot of time in bed lately. He tried not to, to keep busy, but sometimes he felt like he just . . . couldn’t do it.

Mindlessly, he opened twitter to distract himself. His feed was full of twitch streams going live, small comments from his favorite celebrities, and of course, cat videos. Chris opened a video of a cat trying to jump on top of a car.

Just when Chris started to think maybe he would take a shower, a chime resounded throughout the house. The doorbell.

Chris furrowed his brows in confusion, and he couldn’t help how he tensed. He wasn’t expecting anybody, and his parents weren’t home. Was that a neighbor? Maybe the police?

Chris swallowed as he stood, contemplatively. An irrational part of him imagined a policeman, his hands on his belt, saying, “We found him.”

But that wasn’t who was at the door.

When Chris made his way downstairs and looked outside, he saw none other than Sam Giddings, standing in the cold with two Starbucks cups in either hand. Immediately he felt his heart rate quicken. He hadn’t talked to Sam in weeks—probably a month, even. Not that she hadn’t tried. He may have been ignoring her calls.

Ruefully, Chris opened the door before he could stop himself. Sam turned to face him from where she was glancing at his parents’ plants and smiled.

“Chris! Hey buddy.”

“Hey, uh . . . What’s up?”

Sam looked like she was searching for the words, until suddenly she seemed to remember the coffee in her hands and held one out for Chris.

“Vanilla raspberry latte. Just the way you like it.”

Chris would’ve blushed if he thought anyone could hear her. Luckily, the houses in the neighborhood were spread pretty decently apart.

“Well look at that. Thanks Sam.” Chris took the cup from her, noting the comforting warmth it emitted. “Is there a special occasion I should know about?”

“No. No, just figured I would stop by, make sure you’re alive. I decided after the third call I should make sure you’re okay.” Before Chris could respond, Sam added, “Man, it’s cold out here.”

Chris felt a small sense of dread. He was going to have to let her in. Although if he was being honest with himself, it made him happy just being around his friend again.

“It is way too cold, even with the coffee. Come on inside.”

Chris opened the door more, and in stepped Sam, scraping her shoes off and flashing him a grateful smile.

“Wooh. Thank you.”

“Of course. Can I get you anything? Besides coffee, I mean.”

“See that’s the purpose of me getting you coffee. I’m good.”

Chris shrugged. “Hey, I’m just trying to be nice. Although I’m already flawless at that.”

Sam chuckled. “Flawless, right.”

Chris led Sam further inside, stopping at the couch in the living room and plopping down.

“So how have you been, Samwise?”

Sam rolled her eyes at the nickname and took a sip of her drink.

“—Good. Well, I mean. Managing.” She looked at him. “What about you?”

Something in her tone meant she wanted an answer different than just “good.” Chris tried his best.

“Fine.”

Sam tilted her head. “That so?”

“Yup.” He accented the “p.”

Sam turned away from him, thinking. Chris was about to break the silence when she turned back, her expression cautious.

“So . . . You know how the other day I asked if you wanted to go see that movie, and you said you were busy?”

That was three weeks ago.

“Oh, yeah. I was hanging out with Mike.”

“Right.” Sam paused. “See that’s . . . weird.”

Chris furrowed his brows. “What’s weird about it?”

“Since when did you hang out with Mike? I’m not trying to say you weren’t, I’m just curious. Did you learn about his secret love of Star Trek?”

Chris’s eyes widened slightly. “Mike likes Star Trek?”

“Not really. Well, I don’t know. Shot in the dark.”

Chris tried not to focus on the word “shot,” or the way it made him immediately think back to the last time he held a gun. The last thing he shot.

“Chris?”

Chris’s head snapped up, and he hummed a “hm?”

Sam looked worried. She knew something was off with him. Chris hated that he wanted her to ask.

“Are you okay?”

Chris paused. Was he okay? Was working all day and being on his phone all night and hanging out with Mike Munroe okay? Was it okay he hadn’t gotten actual sleep in weeks?

“I just . . . You’ve been acting kind of weird lately. And I’m not the only one to notice.”

Chris frowned. “Wait, who else has?”

“Ashley.”

Shit. Chris and Ashley had both kept to themselves lately, only occasionally hanging out or calling. He knew he wasn’t being who she needed him to be. The thought filled him with shame.

“Well . . . I’ve had some stuff on my mind, I guess. Nothing big.”

Sam nodded along. “Okay. What kind of stuff?”

Chris tensed and flexed his fingers nervously. “Like I said, nothing big. What about you? You doing alright?”

Sam frowned. “Let’s not change the subject just yet. Do you want to talk about what’s been going on? Why you’ve been acting different?”

Chris frowned. “No, no, really. It’s fine.”

Sam thought for a moment before patting his back.

“You know, Chris, you don’t have to keep everything locked up like that. I know . . . I know you’ve been through a lot. I was there, too. And that just means that I understand. So really, if you want help—just ask.”

She smiled slightly, sympathetically, and Chris took off his glasses and rubbed his face.

“See, that’s the thing. I do want help. I’m a twenty year old man living in my parents’ house, doing nothing but lie around, and that’s still not enough.”

“Chris . . .”

He raised his hands briefly, gesturing to nothing in particular. “I couldn’t do anything then, and I can’t do anything now.”

He didn’t need to specify which “then.” Sam seemed to have an epiphany, and she looked in his eyes as she spoke.

“Is that what this is about?”

Chris glanced at her. “What?”

“The mountain. Do you feel like you . . . weren’t good enough for something?”

Chris seemed taken aback.

“Well I don’t know, maybe the fact that I left my best friend to die and wasn’t even fast enough to get to him has something to do with ‘not being good enough.’”

Sam looked contemplative, and Chris felt bad for his outburst.

“Sorry.”

Sam looked at him again before drinking more of her drink, then setting it down on the coffee table.

“Chris, you do realize that you’re a human, right? You’re not a robot, or a superhero, or whatever else you might be watching. You can’t . . . You can’t just expect so much of yourself without understanding what you’re feeling.”

Chris looked down, quiet. It was easy for Sam to say. She had always been so . . . proactive. On the mountain, she’d tried to save Josh. Her and Mike had saved the rest of them all. She was different from him.

Sam sensed his thoughts straying and put a hand on his shoulder, turning him to look at her.

“Hey. I know I can’t fix anything for you, or change the way you see yourself. But just know that I’m here for you. I understand if you want space, but honestly, it might not be such a good idea to shut everyone out. And I know Mike isn’t asking you these questions.”

She was right. He’d only started hanging out with him because Mike had seemed so unbothered in the past couple of months. He was strong, and Chris wanted to emulate that.

“Just. Don’t forget that it’s okay to make mistakes, to not be perfect. It’s the same for us all.”

Chris glanced at her. “Right.” He paused before adding more genuinely, “Thank you.”

Sam smiled at him, and Chris felt himself smiling back.

“What are friends for?” She peeked down at his coffee.

“You going to drink that?”

Chris held his drink back, a feigned look of offense on his face.

“Uh, yes? Is that what friends are for too? Stealing your coffee?”

Sam shrugged. “It’s a beautiful duality.”

Chris rolled his eyes, but he had to admit, he was already feeling better just with Sam with him. He started to regret not answering her calls, but caught himself. People make mistakes. It’s alright.

Chris took a drink and sighed.

This was going to be hard.

[skullrock]

the partners | Steve x Reader

chapter one: please, please, please, let me get what I want 

series summary: you and Steve are police apprentices at Hawkins Police Station in the fall of 1986. you get along famously, but there’s something Steve is hiding, and there is an unknown evil lurking in Hawkins. [friends to lovers, angst, hurt/comfort, fluff]

chapter summary: Steve finally agrees to hang out outside of work. 

warnings: swearing, 80s music 

word count: 2.4k

a/n: this chapter is mainly a ton of exposition, but it’s gonna get better I PROMISE. huge thank ya to @wolfish-willow​ who gave me some beautiful ideas (milky coffee + danish loving Steve) that helped this fic come to fruition <3 enjoy!

--

You pull into Hawkin’s Police Department at 7:30, a half hour before your shift. There are two coffees in the cup holders of your car, and a paper bag filled with two pastries on the passenger seat. You pull in beside your partner’s car and he hops out, a smile plastered on his face. He crawls into your passenger side and grabs the bag.

“This one’s yours,” you say, pointing to the coffee cup marked milk w/ dash of coffee. He laughs, pulling out his blueberry danish and handing you your strawberry donut. He bites into his pastry and lets out a sinful moan, making you smack his arm.

“It’s too early for you to be gross,” you say, but he looks victorious.

“I’m sorry you don’t like my happiness,” he quips, and you roll your eyes.

It was tradition that every Monday that you both worked, you’d get coffee and pastries from the local bakery and shoot the shit in your car until your shift started.

“So, I had a dream last night where I was dating Mia Sara,” he says.

“Wish that were me,” you reply, taking a sip of coffee. “Did it work out for you guys?”

“Nah, she left me for Harrison Ford.”

“Tragic.”

He pauses, listening to the music softly coming from your radio. He scoffs upon realizing what was playing.

“Stop listening to this sad shit,” he says, turning the dial, making you shout.

“It’s the Smiths!” You try to bat his hand away, but he manages to change the channel to a Queen song. Typical.

You and Steve had become good friends after securing your positions, despite your perception of him in high school. After the fire at Starcourt and the death of Jim Hopper, the federal government had given the Hawkins Police a grant to let aspiring cops train directly in the field. It would fast-track getting certified, eliminating the need for expensive schooling. It was like a paid internship. A paid internship where you basically get paid to bullshit with your best friend all day.

A third car pulls in. It’s Veronica, the secretary. She takes over on days that Flo wants off – she’s worked hard enough for it. Veronica was a bit obsessed with Steve, so he groaned when he saw her get out and wave.

“What do you think she’s going to say to you today?” you giggle, and Steve rolls his eyes.

“Probably, like… that she had a dream about us last night, or something.” He squeezes his eyes shut. “God, please don’t let her talk to me.”

Women were throwing themselves at Steve the minute he put the uniform on, but he claimed he wasn’t interested in dating. You weren’t really sure why, given his history, but he never answered any questions. He just said he wanted to focus on work and having fun, so you let him.

Steve was kind of a mystery to you. You were incredibly close at the station, but you’d been working with him for a few months and you never saw each other outside of work. There were talks of maybe going to a movie, but they never went anywhere. It was bizarre, considering how fond you both were of each other. But you didn’t want to push it, unsure if you were making him uncomfortable.

In reality, Steve was just nervous of letting people in. Not just because of his history with girls and friends, but because he also had Russians and demons to worry about. He felt that if he let anyone new into his life, he would be putting them in mortal danger. This viewpoint is also the reason why he applied for the apprenticeship in the first place.

When the position popped up, Steve had no second thoughts. He had looked up to Hopper greatly since the time Will was possessed. He knew without a doubt that he wanted to follow in Hop’s footsteps. But he also felt an obligation now that Hopper was dead. Joyce had left, taking Will and Eleven with her. The three people who had the best grip on the strange events that had occurred the past three years were gone, and the man who devised most of the plans (and executed them) was gone, too. Steve couldn’t sleep at night for months. He needed to constantly call the kids and Robin to make sure they were safe. Being part of the Hawkins Police seemed like a no-brainer; it was a way to ensure everyone was safe and be on the frontlines to protect them.

Not that he ever let this on; usually he would just say that he’s always wanted to be a cop, and he kept it at that.

You’d decided to do the apprenticeship after college didn’t work out. You went to one in Indianapolis after high school, but you weren’t really into it. Your parents decided to retire and travel for a few years, offering to let you have the house while they’re gone. You gratefully took them up on it, and you’d been living there since the spring. You’d enjoyed a few months off, but decided it was time to find something new to do. You’d always had a fantasy of being a hero. Maybe not a hero cop, but a hero. You wanted to save lives, make an impact. Being a police officer seemed like a good start. You knew it wouldn’t be like the movies, but the strange events that happened the last few years excited you. Maybe you’d get the chance to be someone you’ve always wanted to be.

“Why don’t you just give Veronica a chance?” you ask. “She’s pretty and she’s nice and she’s smart.”

“She literally told me she wanted a lock of my hair,” he says.

You choke on your coffee. “I forgot about that.”

“Yeah? I didn’t.”

Steve’s watch beeps, signaling that it’s 5 minutes until 8.

“Please keep talking to me when we go in,” he begs as you both climb out of the car.

“What’s in it for me?” you inquire.

“I will give you all of the lunches my mom brings me for two weeks.”

You pause. “Even the Fruit Roll-Ups?”

He sighs. “I’ll throw them in if you do a good job.”

You successfully make it past the reception desk without incident, waving hi to Callahan and Powell. You knock on the Chief’s door to signify your arrival, and you and Steve make your way back to the annex you worked in. Your desks faced each other, making it easier to talk through your 8-hour shifts. They were usually pretty boring. You and Steve were only cleared to respond to calls about petty things, like noise disturbances. But it’s not like much ever happened anymore in Hawkins, and the town had almost made it a full year without any weird occurrences.

A few hours go by, and boredom runs rampant. You hated Mondays: things hardly ever happened. Steve gets up around 10:30 and puts a mixtape into the boombox in the annex. Don’t You (Forget About Me) comes on, and Steve mutters, “aw, hell yeah,” under his breath. You know he’s going to start dancing, but it doesn’t stop the surprised smile on your face as he starts to swing and spin and sing. It’s magic, watching Steve dance. It makes no sense, it’s clumsy, it’s so white that it hurts; but it’s also hilarious and never fails to pick you up. Sometimes you’d join him. Other times, you’d call him an idiot. And sometimes you’d just watch as the magic unfolds.

This was one of those times.

--

The door to the annex opens around 1, approximately 5 hours into your shift. You and Steve are begging for something to do, because throwing M&Ms at each other isn’t fun by the second hour. You’d just thrown one at Steve when the door swings open, and you and Steve look at the intruder with wide eyes. It’s the Chief.

The new Chief was okay, you guessed. He was also brought in by the feds. He was a kind older man, with deep set blue eyes and wispy white hair. He could have come straight out of a storybook. You thought the Chief delegated nicely, and you’d shared a few good laughs. Something always felt off, though – but you and Steve chalked that up to the fact that you both were extremely biased against anyone who wasn’t Hop.

“Noise disturbance call,” Chief Edwards says. “Some kids out on Maple Street are causing mayhem.”

Steve groans and throws his head back. “Please tell me it’s not 30 Maple Street.”

The Chief blinks. “It is.”

“God dammit,” Steve says under his breath. It’s Mike’s house.

You and Steve get into a patrol car and set off.

“Do you know these kids?” you ask.

“Yeah, they’re kind of… my kids?”  He scrunches his nose. “I keep them out of trouble.”

You pause, confused. “So, you babysit them?”

“No, no,” Steve says. His face grows slightly red. “They’re my friends.”

Steve pulls into the driveway of the house, blaring the siren once to scare the kids that were on the lawn. Their faces quickly went from scared to excited as they saw it was Steve in the car.

You both get out of the car, and Steve takes the lead. He puts his hands on his hips and faces the kids. There were 4 boys and 2 girls, no older than 16, if you could guess. One of them with dark hair is holding a hose, and the others are wet.

“What are you shitheads doing?” Steve asks sternly. A couple of the kids giggle.

“What seems to be the problem, officer?” the red headed girl asks.

“I told you we were being too loud,” a kid you recognize as Will Byers says. He is smart, sitting on the porch and just watching, amused.

“Right,” says Steve, pointing at Will in recognition. “Way too loud. Mike, where’s your parents?”

There’s a beat, and then the girl standing next to the red head quietly says, “Mr. and Mrs. Wheeler aren’t home.”

Steve sighs. “Alright, well, you could always act like idiots inside the house, you know.” He looks at the dark-haired boy holding the hose. “Mike, what are you doing with that?”

The boy’s face breaks out into a devilish grin, and you can predict what’s about to happen. He points the hose at Steve and a curly haired boy turns the handle to let the water spray out, missing Steve by a hair. He jumps back.

“HEY!” he shouts. “Not cool dude, not in my uniform!”

“Wimp,” you laugh, and push him forward, allowing him to get splashed. The kids cheer, and then Steve’s hands are on your arms, and he swings you around to get hit, too. You gasp at the freezing feeling on the back of your legs, but burst into laughter, trying to wrestle Steve back into the flow. This goes on for entirely too long before you suddenly realize that it probably isn’t a good look to be out here responding to a call and then partaking in the offense.

“Steve,” you say, and that’s all it takes for him to snap back into reality.

“This is fun and all,” he says, letting you go. “But we came to bust you, not join in.”

The curly haired boy turns the water off and Mike sets the hose down. Steve has a way with kids. He’s able to level with them and call them out at the same time. It’s pretty great to watch and it’s certainly something you admired him for.

“Who’s this?” the curly haired kid asks, grinning widely.

“Oh,” Steve says. “This is my partner, Y/N.”

“Do you get to carry a gun?”

“Lucas!”

“Sorry!”

“You hang out with Steve? That must suck,” the dark-haired boy, Mike, says.

“Every single day,” you say solemnly. “It’s the worst.”

“Hey,” Steve says quietly.

“I’m kidding, bud.” You punch his arm lightly. “You’re the best.”

You look back at the kids and they’re all staring at you with wide eyes. It makes you uncomfortable, so you clear your throat and say, “Well, uh – shift is almost over. We should be going.”

After an awkward farewell and another “please be quiet or I’ll kick your ass” from Steve, you both get in the patrol car. Steve sees Dustin gesture to call him, and he rolls his eyes, pulling out of the driveway.

“Why did they look at me like that?” you ask. “Because I said you’re the best?” You pause. “Do they hate you?”

He’s quiet for a while. Finally, he says, “I think it’s because we are really buddy-buddy but… I don’t really… I haven’t ever really… talked about you.”

You turn in your seat to face him. “Do you hate me?”

“Of course I don’t hate you.” His cheeks are red – he’s flustered. “You’re one of my best friends –“

“Then why don’t you ever talk about me? Or hang out with me?”

“It’s complicated,” he sighs. “It’s really complicated. I just – I don’t like … I get nervous about having new friends.”

You nod slowly. “Tommy H. and Carol.”

“Yeah.” It’s not really why he’s nervous, but it’s a good excuse. “I don’t want to get dicked over again.”

“Man,” you say, turning back to face the road. “I buy you a blueberry danish every single Monday. And a coffee. And I let you sing Queen at the top of your lungs, and I let you dance, and sometimes I even let you do it at 5 in the morning. I think if I didn’t want to be your friend, you would know by now.”

He’s quiet, thinking. You look at him, trying to read him.

“I guess I owe you the pleasure of hanging out with me,” he says after a while, a smile forming. “So maybe we can hang out Friday night.”

You gasp and throw your arm out, hitting him on the shoulder, making the car swerve slightly.

“Jesus –”

“Do you mean it?” you shout, smiling widely. “We can hang out?”

“I said maybe,” he teases. “It’s board game night with the kids – maybe you can come?”

You start chanting his name – “Steve Steve Steve Steve Steve! Really? Are you for real?”

“Yes!” He laughs and rolls his eyes again. “I’ll pick you up. It starts at 7.”

You smile so hard that your cheeks hurt.

Steve silently hopes he doesn’t regret this.

----

taglist (message if you want to join!): @harrington-ofhawkins​ @wolfish-willow​ @gothackedalready​

[jojolu]

Six Months in Boston

Pairing: Chris Evans/OC Erin Rose

Summary: Up and coming YA author Erin Rose, was sent to a small suburb 30 minutes Northwest of Boston to finish the last two books of her series, she is about to get very close to her very handsome new neighbor.

a/n: here goes nothing!

chapter 1: Enjoy Nature

"Oh my God! Just poop already Letty!" You shout at your Chihuahua Dachshund mix breed dog. She finally does and you pick it up and tie the bag.

You are walking on a new path the realtor showed you on a map. Your phone rings and it's your   sister Tilly FaceTime'ing you.

"Hey girl......where the fuck are you? Are you exercising?"

"Ugh gross! Never. Just exploring, Mike the realtor was saying there are 30 beautiful walking paths all around! Enjoy nature....that fucking tool."

"Where exactly are you? In case I need to come and find your body in the woods."

"In a small suburb, its technically the country! I'm thirty minutes northwest of Boston. My editor sent me to Boston. MASSACHUSETTS!! LIKE WHO AUTHORIZED THIS. For a year Till! I'm a hard core West coast kid! Born and raised near the ghetto."

"Pasadena, is nowhere near the ghetto. Its your fault, your way to good of a writer. Your first book shouldn't have been so good. Like bitch, you already have studios fighting for the movie rights."

You wrote, The Wish Masters, your senior year in Grad school on a whim. Your professor wanted you all to write 1 chapter of a book and you wrote 15, when you turned it, she called you into her office the following Monday. 6 years later on your 35th birthday it was released.

It bit of Harry Potter mixed in with Tinkerbell. All the Fairy families are separated by the type of groups and your story starts when the age of fairies start to die off. Deenah and her friends Mave and Trax are off on a journey to fix and restore the age of Fairies. 

"Yeah, yeah. Oh no there a dog loose." You see a brown and white dog with a red collar and leash dragging behind him.

"Let me see!" Tilly says.

You flip the camera and stick your phone in your sportsbra.

 You call him over and read his tag.

"Hey Dodger, gosh are a pretty dog. Letty, this is Dodger, Dodger, this wild animal is Letty girl."

You pick up his leash and continue walking the way Dodger came from.

"You fucking weirdo. That dog looks familiar. What's his name?"

"Familiar? Are you an Instagram dog, D man?" You say leaning closer to Dodger.

"Holy fucking shit! That's Chris Evans dog. I bet my fucking life on it."

"Seriously? Please God, don't let this be his dog. I'm not ready!"

You hear a man's voice calling out Dodger's name.

"Oh no......"

The person you see, isn't Chris Evans but his younger brother, Scott.

"That's Scott his brother!" Tilly says.

"I know.....Shhhh."

"Dodger! Hey man, you scared us." Scott says walking up to you.

"He just walked up to us." You say handing him the leash.

"Thank you! Chris would have KILLED me! I got him." He says as he yells back to the sound of a person walking up behind you.

You look past him and see Chris Evans. 

Your mind goes blank.

"Hi I'm Tilly!" You sister says from your boobs.

"Hi, mystery voice coming from this nice lady's boobs. " Scott says.

"OH my God! It's my sister." You take your phone out of your sportsbra and turn it so he can see her.

She waves like a crazy person.

"Hi, Tilly. I'm Scott."

"Hi! This is my sister Erin Rose."

"I totally forgot to introduce myself."

"She's a writer she wrote The Wish Masters, Jimmy Fallon just had her on last week. She just sent the second and half of the third one to her editor, She there to write two more books, she'll be there a year and she lives at 347 Mills Rd and that's her dog Letty, we found her on a trip to Joshua Tree, four years ago."

"Stop talking or I'm going to hang up and block you." You say to the phone.

"Sorry....."

"Well, this is my brother Chris Evans, he is an actor, you know him from Not Another Teen Movie and Cellular. He's has lived here for about three years and he lives at 345 Mills Rd and that's his dog Dodger, who he got a shelter about three years ago."

You look at Chris who is shaking his head.

You mouth, "I'm so sorry."

He mouth,"No, I'm sorry."

You both smile at each other. You look away to where Dodger and Letty are laying down, Letty is laying on Dodger's legs licking him.

"Well, it looks like you two are neighbors." Scott says to you both.

"Right! That's awesome, she's very single." Tilly says as she hangs up.

"Oooh she's not getting invited to any of the movie premieres. I'm going go home. Come on Letty." You say pulling her leash. 

She doesn't budge.

"To bad you only weigh eleven pounds." You say picking her up.

You turn to your left and then to your right.

Fuck!  

Erin why are you so dumb! 

You have no clue which direction your house is.

"Left." Chris says.

"Thank you." You say turning back left and walking away holding a dog that doesn't want to leave.

"She left her water bottle." Scott says.

"I'll take it to her later." Chris says picking it up.

"She's gorgeous......did you see her ass......damn." Scott says.

Chris just looks at him as he starts to walk away, Dodger turns and tries to follow the direction you left in.

"I did, and that's all I'm going to say."

"You going to save that image for your spank bank?"

"Spank bank? Seriously?"

"Sorry, I watched 10 Things I Hate About You last night. Great film. I know how long it's been, so don't act like you haven't already ready pictured her under you or on her knees."

"For fucks sake, Scott!? I just met her, technically we haven't really even met." Chris says walking away.

Scott laughs as he walks behind Chris.

"Fuck you, Scott! Now that's all I'm thinking about!" He yells as he starts to run.

You make it back in 10 minutes.

You were talking out loud the whole time.

"Really! Is this really fucking happening! Chris fucking Evans! Is this because I read that Chris Evans fanfic? Listen! I'm sorry! Well I'm not really! That's story was cute and he sounds great in bed. Speaking of bed! Am I supposed to act like I didn't see his dick?  What a beautiful penis.....oh my God. We share a driveway....his house is what like sixty fucking feet from my house.......great now all I can think of his is dick! Did I save that on my phone?"

You were walking so fast and distracted you just realized you left your water bottle. You set it down when you picked up Dodger's leash.

"Dammit, I love that water bottle, let's go inside." You say to the dog that is sniffing all around Chris's side of the driveway.

You walk inside and Letty goes and gets in her kennel and gets under her blanket.

You take off your shoes and head to take a shower. Tilly calls right after you walk out of the shower.

"Can I help you?"

"Hi, I just spent the last 20 minutes Google'ing him. He's very much single. He loves to take Dodger out on walks, he's covered in tattoos, he enjoys working with his hands, he loves his family, is an ass man and he has a huge penis."

"I don't care. I'm not going to do anything with information. I'm here for one reason, to write these books. This is not a story someone is writing. I'm not going to fall in love with him, he isn't going to take me on long walks where we can't keep our hands off each other, our dogs aren't going to be best friends and constantly have to see each other, you and Scott aren't going to be best friend and have matching toasts at our beautiful Farmhouse wedding." You suddenly get choked up.

"Ohhhh Erin...I'm sorry. I just got excited." She says suddenly with emotion in her voice.

"Serves you right! Who said those acting classes wouldn't help me write better." 

"You bitch! Just so you know he has a wide tongue, too." She hangs up.

Ugh, you just used the massage setting on your handheld shower head. Living next to him was going to kill you.

You get dressed, in a tank top dress that has a built-in bra and head out your pool. You hear laughing coming from your neighbor's house and fight the urge to look over.

"Erin!" You hear Chris yell.

"Please, have a shirt on...." You say before turning around.

"Hey, Chris."

Fuck him. 

No, seriously.

Fuck this sexy ass bastard.

He of course, is in just black swim trunks walking closer to his the fence. There are all the tattoos Tilly said he had, she didn't mention the chest hair.....you just want you rub your hands all over his body.

This is the closet your houses are to each other.

"Did you get that?" Chris asks looking at you.

"Shit, sorry thinking about my...book." You stumbled out.

"I have your water bottle and I was thinking that I could say thank you for grabbing Dodger, by ordering us some lunch?"

"It was no hassle, he just walked right up to me. Sure, yes that would be great."

"You want to come over now? You can come swim with me....if you want. Can you....." He stops himself.

"Were you about to ask me, a black woman, if I can swim?" You say giving him tons of attitude.

He goes beet red.

"Uh no...I was just...you have your hair straight....so I....."

You start to laugh at him.

"I thought Mackie would have told you what not to ask a black woman, it's a weave, I'm taking out next week and getting braids. Yes, I can swim, I was actually a lifeguard all throughout high-school and college. I'll change and grab Letty."

You see the relief in his face.

Did you just fluster Chris Evans.....

You are thankful for your sister, she made you buy all new swimsuits with your cash advance money. You put on your Victoria's Secret ruffle bottom bikini, you got it in three colors, white, pink and green. 

You put on the white one. Put your black sheer cover up.

You put your hair up in a messy bun and grabbed Letty.

"Listen, woman! You better act right! Do not pee on his floor!" You say to the dog who is very confused why she is getting a lecture. 

You put her down and grab the gift basket you just got from Sam Adam's and the freezer box it came in. He isn't in the back yard any more so you walk to his front door and ring the door bell.

"Brace yourself Erin...." You mumble out.

You can hear Dodger barking and Chris telling him to calm down.

He opens the door and smiles at you.

"Welcome, here let me take that. Come in."

Thankfully he put a shirt on.

You follow him to his kitchen while looking in all of his rooms.

"Our houses are the exact same. Even down to the floors. Literally the exact same. You need to see it."

"I'd like that."

You both pause for a second.

Letty and Dodger playing is what broke the tension.

"Its Letty, right? From The Fast and The Furious." 

"It is. Strangely, not many people get that."

"And Dodger, from Oliver and Company?"

"Yes, exactly. Most people think the baseball team."

"Why you have the Sox over here."

"Exactly. You want to head outside?"

"Lead the way." 

He grabs the gift basket and walks towards his backyard.

"Did you buy this?"

"Nope, I mentioned them in an interview and I got this, just yesterday."

"Not going lie that probably my favorite thing about this whole crazy life."

"Same, dude! I swear, someone asked what pen I used and I said Paper-Mate and I had a special delivery the next day. I'm really looking forward to when these studios choose my book."

"Which studios?" He asks opening your gift basket.

"You're just gonna open MY gift basket?"

"I thought this was for me?" He says laughing.

"Why would I give you MY gift basket? I don't know you like that!" You say laughing too.

"Go ahead you already opened it. Paramount, Warner Brothers, Universal and Disney! I'm really excited about that one. They are thinking of my books as movies will start a new segment of Disney aimed at teenagers!" You practically shout.

"That's amazing and my heart is with Disney."

"Holy shit, I haven't told anyone that and wasn't supposed to........I figure you can keep a secret, Cap."

"You going to make me sign an NDA?" He says waaaaay to flirty. 

He opens one of the beers and takes a long drink.

 He licks his bottom lip.

"I could get one drafted up, if I need to. Can I have I one of MY beers, please?"

"Fine, but I get this hat." He says pulling a blue Sam Adam's hat out.

He hands you a beer and your hands touch. He doesn't let go, he grabs his bottle opener and opens for you.

"Thanks. Stop taking my stuff Christopher!"

"You don't want this hat or.....this beer coozie or.........these beer pretzels." He says taking all the things he mentioned.

"Give me those fucking pretzels."You say reaching for them.

"Come on, you don't want these." He opens the bag and takes a handful.

"Ohh you are not nice." You say standing up you take off your swim cover and walk up to him. Your breast are touching his chest and every time you inhale he looks down at your chest.

"Can I help you?" He says looking down at you.

"Chris, can I please, pretty please have those pretzels, I need something hard..and..salty in my mouth."You say with your hands on his chest.

He hands them to you without another word.

"Thanks, dude." You say grabbing them and sitting back down on his pool chaise.

"That was so mean! I'm still keeping this hat and coozie." He says looking over at you.

"Sure, but I'm keeping the corn hole set."

"You sure? I can take it off your hands."

You hear Letty barking at the backdoor.

Chris goes and let's them both put, they are chasing each other in circles, they finally sit he keeps messing with her and she keeps biting him then running away.

"Looks, like they found their best friend." Chris says.

"Yep. She's such an alpha. I'm surprised she letting him be so aggressive with her."

"Well, he definitely likes the challenge of a strong woman."

"She definitely likes the attention."

"He really likes to give it."

You weren't sure at what point you both stopped talking about the dogs but you needed to get in the pool to cool off.

"So we doing this or nah?"

"Huh?" The confusion on his face was priceless.

"Swimming? Or did you just asked me to get in a bikini for nothing."

He pulls off his shirt, finished his beer and walks to the pool, turns to face you, winks and does a perfect back flip.

"Oh you fancy." You get up and walk up to about 3 feet to his pool turn towards him do a cart wheel, that goes into a round off, which has you end right at the edge of his pool, then you do a backflip into the water.

"I give that a fucking ten." He says swimming up to you.

"Thank you. I'll give yours a 9.5 you lost a half point for trying to flirt with the judge."

"I should be given a whole extra point for that."

You splash him and swim away.

"Oooh now you started it." He dives down and pulls you under the water.

You poke him in the ribs and he let's go.

"Ouch!"

You swim up close to him.

"Sorry! I didn't mean to...."

He pulls you under again.

You pull him down too and start to have a contest to see who can stay under water longer. It's been 30 seconds and he is struggling. He groans and swims up.

He watches you as you flip into a handstand underwater and walk away from him, you come up 20 seconds later.

"Damn...."

"Sorry, lifeguard!"

"I normally have much better breath control." He says swimming closer to you.

"Oh really? You practice that?" You say smirking.

"Haven't needed to, come here." 

You get closer and he reaches right under your eye takes the eyelash that had fallen.

"Make a wish." He says holding it up to your mouth.

You close your eyes and blow.

You open your eyes slowly and he is staring at you.

You throw caution to the wind and put your arms around his neck and he immediately put his arms around your waist and pulls you towards him. He walks to the shallow end of his pool and puts you against the side of it.

"I'm fighting every urge to kiss you." He says.

"Same. You have no idea how much I want to."

"Then why aren't we kissing?" He says nuzzling and nipping your jaw.

"Because we both know it not going to just be kissing."

"Kiss me and find out." He says kissing your cheek and right under your ear.

"Why don't you kiss me?" You say running your nails down his back.

"I am kissing you." He moves down to your neck.

You turn your head so he'll kiss that spot under your jaw. He does and you practically moan out his name.

"Fuck, you sound so good moaning out my name."

"Kiss me." You moan out as he kisses that spot again. 

"Where?" He runs his tongue against that spot and gently bites you.

You finally turn your head and kiss him. He somehow pulled you even closer.

You put your hands in his hair as he slides his tongue inside your mouth. You pull away a bit and just look at him.

"What? We can stop."

"Nothing, I'm just taking you in. You're really good looking. I did not think this was going to happen." You say giggling.

"You're sweet. You're so gorgeous. You didn't? That bikini doesn’t agree." He says putting his hand on your ass.

You just laugh.

"Apparently, the internet is true, 'Chris Evans, an ass man'."

"With an ass like this, most definitely." He says putting his other hand on your ass.

"You are a whole mess. But to answer your question, I had maybe hoped that I could make out with my super hot neighbor, maybe just once."

"I knew it. Well that same internet calls you 'The writer who is taking YA by storm' I also saw your photoshoot in Vanity Fair, that's why I hoped you were going to wear a bikini, but this....."He runs his thumb along the edge of your bikini bottoms. "This is better than I could imagined."

He kisses you again and you wrap your legs around his waist and you can finally feel his amazing dick against your pussy.

"Damn, I can feel how warm your pussy is, I can't wait to taste you." He says in your ear.

"You look like this and can talk dirty."

"That's nothing......."

You bring his mouth back to yours and bite his bottom lip.

He reaches up and unties your bikini top, then kisses his way down to your nipple and slowly sucks it into his mouth, between his hot mouth and the chill of the water your close to an orgasm.

"Oh my goodness. You are the absolute worst."

He moves to your left breast, while his hand slowly making its way to your pussy.

The backdoor opens....

"Chris, I called you like 8 fucking times...............well hello Erin." Scott says.

"Oh my God, Scott!" You yell.

Chris just holds you close to give you some sort of cover.

"I obviously don't have my phone on me."

"I can see your hands are very full." He says looking straight into the water.

Chris tries to re-tie your top.

"Walk her to me." Scott says squatting down.

He ties the your top for you and get off of Chris.

"Well, this is not embarrassing at all!" You say swimming away.

"I'm fine." Scott says taking off his sandals and shirt and getting in the pool.

"That was the beginning and not the ending of that, right?"

"Ask him." You say laughing.

"You good over?" Scott asks him, when you both realize that he hadn't moved.

"Yep." He quickly turn and swims straight for you. 

You scream and try to swim away. 

He grabs you around the waist and puts you over his shoulder, then stand up so your ass is in his face and he turns and bites your left ass cheek. Then takes you back under the water. You bite him on his back and he let's you go.

You swim away and hide behind Scott.

"Nope, don't bring that shit over here." 

"You heard him. Go away Chris."

"Come here, Erin." 

He says as he lunges towards you.

You were quicker and got out of the pool.

He watches you walk away.

"Erin, can I have fries with that shake?" 

"You better behave."

"This is me behaving."

"You want a beer, Scott?" 

"Always." You open it and had it to him.

"Do I get one?" 

"Are you going to behave?"

"Probably, not."

You open his and walk it over to him.

You finally get yours.

"Watch this."

You put your beer bottle on the edge of the pool, stand to the left of it.

You do a cart wheel right over the bottle but stay on your hands and pick it up with your teeth and suck it in a little, then do a front to back slit then push off your hands and gracefully flip into the water. You come up with the beer bottle still in your mouth.

"Holy shit. That's awesome." Scott says.

Chris is just leaning against the side of the pool staring at you.

You swim up to him

"You didn't like it?"  You ask feeling a bit insecure.

He grabs your hand and walks you out of the pool and straight towards his back door.

"We'll be right back. Go ahead order whatever for lunch." He says to Scott as you follow him inside.

[ghostspideys-moved]

All For The Best

Chapter Six

A/N: This one’s unfortunately kind of short, but I’m doing my best to keep up and update on time.

Word Count: 1.1k

Pairings: Steve Harrington x OC, Nancy Wheeler x Jonathan Byers x OC

Summary: Just when Hawthorne thinks his life can’t get any weirder, he’s proven wrong, and he wonders if it’s too late to back out.

Hawthorne groaned when he heard the phone ring. He’d been sleeping, so it was a very jarring sound. Even worse was how early it was, and it seemed like Jonathan was just as aggravated. 

Groaning, Hawthorne threw the pillow over his head and tried to drown out the sound. He sighed in relief when the ringing stopped, thinking it might be over and he could sleep peacefully again.

His hopes were dashed the moment the ringing started up again. Jonathan groaned and finally got up to answer the phone. At this point, Hawthorne realized he was going to get any more sleep and sat up, rubbing his eyes and yawning. He could just barely make out Jonathan’s voice. 

“Nancy, why wouldn’t he be safe?” 

Whatever was going on, Jonathan sounded very distressed, which was an immediate red flag that something was wrong. Hawthorne got up and went to check on him as he placed the phone back on the receiver.

“Is everything okay?” he asked, his voice still croaky from sleep.

Jonathan sighed and hurried back to his room. “We’re going to find the kids,” he said. “Nancy said something’s wrong, so we have to find Will.”

Hawthorne frowned and followed after him, watching for a moment as he frantically changed. “And just when I thought things might be a little normal around here.” He should have known better than to hope for some normalcy.

There was hardly any time to waste. They headed out to Jonathan’s car and headed to the hospital for Nancy as fast as was legally possible.

As soon as the three of them were finally together, they headed to Nancy’s house, where all of the kids were hanging out. No surprise there. They always gathered in the basement, that he was aware of. 

The door to the basement was closed when they showed up, but Nancy was quick to knock frantically. Mike yelled back in response. 

“Not now, Mom!”

“Mike, open the door.”

There was a pause before Hawthorne heard Mike scramble up the steps to open the door for them, a perplexed look on his face. Before he could even ask what was happening, Nancy hurried them down the stairs to gather the rest of the party.

Hawthorne listened to her ramble on for a bit, explaining everything to the kids. He could tell she was distressed, and he could tell why just listening to her. Admittedly, though, having to hear more shit about the Upside Down and the Mind Flayer, especially after his vision (could he even call it that?), just wasn’t sitting well with him. Sure, he knew they had to do something about this. He was well aware. But the more this dragged on, the lass he wanted to be involved. He hardly wanted to the first time around. And could anyone blame him? Hawthorne spent a whole three years in a lab only to find out he could have been dealing with this earlier? He wasn’t a fan of it.

Even worse was having to listen to Nancy and Jonathan act passive-aggressive towards each other. Hawthorne was trying so hard to fix whatever was going on with them, but they didn’t make it easy. Nor should he have to fix it. He just hoped they would work it out, otherwise he wasn’t sure what he was going to do.

Instead, he was trying to focus on the fact that, apparently, there were more people who were “flayed,” as the kids put it. That felt like something much more important to pay attention to, albeit much scarier. 

El seemed to connect some dots, which led to Nancy’s realization. It was all happening way too fast for Hawthorne to keep up with, and, before he could ask for some much needed clarification, they were already heading back to Jonathan's car. Perhaps the one time he really hated being tall was right now. Piling in with a bunch of kids wasn’t really fun. Before he knew it, Nancy was hurrying out of the driveway. It was alarming to him just how reckless she was being, but he didn’t say anything given the circumstances.

Hawthorne walks up to the door, trailing behind everyone. He feels like he’s gone on autopilot. Like he’s not really in control of himself anymore. He knows the moment they walk into this house, they’ll get the confirmation they need. And that’s when he’ll have to accept that he really is being roped into saving the world again.

It’s the last thing he wanted when he arrived home a few days ago, but he can’t do anything to put a stop to it. Not himself, anyways.

Nancy rang the doorbell — that much he can hear. For a moment, it grounded him to reality, to the moment. He really snapped out of his thoughts when no one answered. 

This is it. 

El opened the door for them, and there was a twisting feeling in Hawthorne’s stomach. The house was eerily silent. The only thing filling that silence is their footsteps, slow and careful as they stepped inside.

While Nancy was preoccupied with calling out, hoping to hear from any of the Holloways, Hawthorne looked around. He kept an eye out for anything out of the norm. But so far, it was just an empty house.

Except the weird smell in the air.

Thankfully, Hawthorne wasn’t the only one who noticed. 

“Do you guys smell that?” Nancy asked. 

Hawthorne nodded quickly, scrunching his nose at the smell. In the kitchen, assorted cans and bottles of chemicals were strewn across the nearly every surface. It made his stomach sick just thinking about what it was all for.

Jonathan picked up a can. “You think they’re guzzling this shit?”

“Yeah, either that or they went on a hell of a cleaning spree.”

Hawthorne felt gross just looking at all the cans. “That doesn’t make any sense, though,” he said.

“Yeah. Last year, Will didn’t eat chemicals,” Max added. “Did you?”

Hawthorne was pretty sure he’d remember that part if he had. 

“No. This is something new.”

Mike seemed to have a solid theory about them making some new substance with the chemicals, which didn’t confuse him any less. 

“Can the Mind Flayer even do that?” Hawthorne asked. “I mean, keep people alive after downing...what...a ton of different chemicals.”

Will shrugged. “It’s hard to say what it could do. I don’t think it has that many limits.” That thought wasn’t unsettling at all.

Nancy led them into the dining room, where she found an empty bottle and a blood stain on the carpet. How quickly she put the pieces together astounded him. It always did. 

Hawthorne followed them to the next room where a rope laid. None of this was a good sign at all. And now they were going to have to find the source of this mess? This was the worst. 

“Mrs. Driscoll,” Will chimed in. “If she wants to go back so badly, why don’t we let her?”

Sure, it was their best shot, but Hawthorne didn’t have to like it. Already, he had lots of regrets about tagging along.

//

Taglist: @charmedtenderness​ @nxncywheeler​ @musicalytrashpanda​

[kaypeace21]

Byler hints in the background of s1-3

Honestly, this should just be called- ‘my autistic brain casually (and without even trying) notices shit in the background, but never mentioned it- because I thought it sounded too crazy to talk about’ XD. But the symbolism and Easter eggs give my byler-shipping heart so much life. So I thought, since you guys prob. didn’t notice it- I’ll mention it anyways.  So here goes.

Drawings/rainbows

There has been a theme in s3 about how Mike equates ‘falling for girls’ as a part of growing up, and his feelings for Will as something childish that he has to has to grow out of. 

- confessing to El : “A feeling … yeah, like, something… like OLD PEOPLE say it sometimes”.

- “And Will too. I was thinking we could all have new presents to play with and *scoffs* Sorry, that made me sound like a 7 year old... (apologizing to El)

- Mike getting in a fight with Will (after d&d), and saying they can’t be close anymore: 

Mike says, “It’s not my fault you don’t like girls!”, and then he tries to ½ apologize only to say, “I’m not trying to be a jerk. Ok? But We’re not kids anymore.” Explaining, this is just the way things are-boys fall in love with girls, get girlfriends, and this is just a part of growing up (heteronormativity).  He tells Will “I mean, what did you think, really? That we were never gonna get girlfriends? We were just gonna sit in my basement all day and play games for the rest of our lives?” And poor Will who is probably more aware of his feelings just responds. “Yeah, I guess I did. I really did.” And of course Mike immediately apologizes for being an “ asshole”, after this.

But here’s the thing! Mike actually does wish he didn’t have to grow up and that he could play games with Will (without girlfriends) for the rest of their lives. His room, in s3, SCREAMS that he’s trying to grow up/act straight... but he can’t let go of his feelings for Will. 

He literally takes down his old childhood poster from s1-2 for a more mature/adult poster. But on the same wall (where the old poster used to be) he hasn’t removed a single d&d drawing Will has given him. He’s pretending that he’s grown out of d&d when Lucas is around- because he’s emulating how (the straight) Lucas acted, all season. But Mike has it BAD (and is seriously pinning) for Will! Like, I love Will but his art at 11 years old isn’t so great to justify it still be on Mike’s wall at age 14.  He’s just that whipped (and literally can’t part with a single drawing Will has ever given him) XD

Like... it’s cannon that Mike caresses Will’s drawings 

He’s that ‘ dumbass blinded by love’ who thinks anything Will’s draws is a perfect- masterpiece. Mike could literally see Will draw scribbles and think it’s amazing! Like in s2 he just guides his hands through the scribbles he drew on the wall- no joke! XD

However, what’s interesting though is the one other things he took down from his wall. In S1 Mike (before he even met El)  has a heart sign, with a red heart being propelled by a rainbow. Yet in s3 , the season where he’s ‘obsessing’ about El- it mysteriously disappears. However, in the first ep of s3 when Mike is making-out with El we see a emergence of the heart being propelled by a rainbow (in El’s room) as a drawing. Probably signifying Mike participating in compulsory-heterosexuality and that no matter how hard he tries- he’s not straight!

So given the fact he can’t part with any of the pictures on the wall...you better believe Mike still has that giant binder filled with every drawing Will has given him . And he’s probably hidden it away , with the rainbow heart sign (because he knows it would look suspicious to have laying around). 

-Also, Mike literally has more rainbow symbolism than Will (and has had it through every season) XD

-the s2 ref being the most on the nose) Forbidden fruit + rainbow = queer forbidden romance. And during the 80s, that rainbow-apple poster in the AV Club was suspected to be in reference to Alan Turning (the gay ‘father of computers’).

Animal easter eggs that relate to byler and the upside down/supernatural-plot .

tigers- Mike keeps a tiger poster (which was right next to that rainbow-heart sign) in his basement through s1-3. In s1 we see Will also has a tiger drawing, which is later put on the wall (like a poster) in s2.  Sara Hopper (like Will ) had her death faked by the government (and had a tiger plushie in s1)- and Kali probably had something to do with it since in the prequel novel ‘suspicious minds’ had Kali talk non stop about her fav animal , tigers.  Theory  here. But again, Jancy is also connected to tigers as a romantic symbol (just like byler).

sharks- The Duffer brothers themselves said they based the s1 demorgorgan off of sharks, which Nancy even references in s1. Mike and Will have shark iconography in their room/basement. Will has a jaws poster shown in s1-2, and Mike has shark toys visible in s2. The shark (and bear) symbolism hint at the fact that Will created the upside down/demorgorgans/mind-flayer using his powers- theory here.

bears- Will since s1 has had bear symbolism around him. Bears symbolically represent  “wisdom” like ‘Will the wise’ and were associated with the demorgorgan/upside down in s1 and 2 as well . Max and Nancy compared demogorgans to bears- and Nancy and Jonathan used a bear-trap to capture a demorgorgan in s1 . 

But s3 made bears a romantic symbol- Mike was going to buy a golden teddy bear for El as a romantic gesture. The golden bear had a bowtie (it’s male). And the gray bear that Mike gives to her, was originally Will’s (as shown in s1 &2). This gray bear is coming right in between Mike and El (at the end of s3). They even kiss , while El presses the bear right in between them.  In conclusion these romantic bears represent Will. * I mean that whole awkward kiss (where Mike’s eyes are open and he doesn’t kiss back- happens in Will’s room, in front of Will’s open closet,  with Will’s bear smushed between them (pretty blatant foreshadowing).

dinosaurs- This one is probably a stretch but we see this boy has tons of dinosaurs (at least 6). He starts to info-dump on El about how much he loves them. But, she has no interest. And if the wtf look didn’t make this obvious.

She even gets up and walks away, ignoring his tangent about dinosaurs. 

She literally couldn’t care less about his interest in them. 

But in spite of this, we see Mike gave her Rory in s3 (since it’s in her bedroom). And in s2 we see him sadly look at Rory, with 2 other dinosaurs in frame. This, along with s1 implies he has a huge collection of various dinosaurs .But his collection is missing one of the most popular dinosaur species... the brachiosaurus (the long necked dinosaur).

And right after this scene in s2 scene, we go to Will’s room. And he has a huge brachiosaurus! This boy couldn’t even afford a halloween costume and had to have his hand-made by his mom... but he could afford this huge -fancy dinosaur replica? I bet Mike bragged about his dinosaur collection to Will (like he did with El). But Will being a nerd, was actually impressed. So Mike actually gave him his best/fav toy in his collection- kind of like what he did with Rory.

frogs- This is the most hilarious thing to me. I laughed for like 20 minutes on my rewatch. In s1 Will has a GIANT stuffed plushie of a frog next to his jaws poster and teddy bear. I’m dead! Will doesn’t even disagree with the “frog face“ insult. 

He’s just like ‘well, he’s my frog face’ . Time to snuggle with this frog that looks just like Mike . Will is so in love but also low key savage dragging Mike like that. I can only imagine Dustin and Lucas saying “nah, you don’t look like a frog”. And poor baby-Mike asking Will what he thinks, and Will not being able to lie, just saying “ Well... some people like frogs.”  XD

We also see that in s2 the frog is missing but the Jaws-poster, coin jar, and the bear (we later see El holding in s3) remain .Probably to indicate this is when Will started to subconsciously suppress his feelings for Mike. Although @theclericwill pointed out -that , instead, Mike may have used the frog-plushie as a pillow... for his frog-face XD

Throwing shade at Mileven/mileven shippers in s2 

In the Montauk pitch (later named Stranger things) they describe the Mike and El dynamic by saying “ If Mike is the Eliot of our show,Eleven is our Et.” (AKA they’re from different planets)

-In s2 , Erica  is forcing He-man and barbie to make out. Lucas angrily separates the two. And then this discussion happens.

Erica: “Hey , They’re in love!”

Lucas (livid- and standing right next to a rainbow): “No, actually,  they’re not. They don’t even exist on the same planet.”

Not to mention I doubt it was a coincident they had a (bratty) pre-pubescent girl be the proxy for most mileven shippers.Like not all mileven shippers are bad, but almost all the toxic ones (that the Duffers have to deal with) are tween girls. And to the Duffers, only a child could think 2 people are ‘in love’ after a week of knowing each other. Or that El could understand such things like romance- given the fact that her and Mike are from different planets (given how El has no experience with the outside world).Mike even says in s2,  he can’t hate Max because he ‘doesn’t know’ her (despite knowing her as long as he knew El). Meaning he doesn’t love El since he doesn’t know her. 

Plus, El told Mike, he treats her like ‘garbage’ and ‘a pet’ . And Finn after s1, said that the Duffers told him Mike thought of El as a puppy, and she is even compared to Dart (a demo-dog in s2). Mike asking Dustin, angrily “What, You have a bond? Just cause he likes nougat (eggos)?” Being a  blatant dig at people obsessing over this shallow aspect of their relationship.

Mileven was also compared to that  of family members. In s1, right before they kissed, she asks “will you be like my brother?” (while wearing Nancy’s dress). And Mike also referred to her as his ‘cousin’ . Not to mention, El loved ted’s laz-eboy chair (and Nancy said Karen and Ted “never loved each other” ). And right before Karen is about to cheat on Ted - she looks at him sleeping in the chair (and the lyrics are ‘I should have walked away’). 

It’s pretty hilarious, since so many people try to ‘no-homo’ byler by saying Mike thinks of Will as a brother/or family- yet, their relationship has never been directly compared to a sibling (unlike mileven).

People also seem to not realize Mike lied in s2 (just like he did in s3). He thought El was dead in s2. He told Max it “got her like it did bob” and then he made a spectacle in front of everyone saying “I never gave up on you”. Which was a blatant lie (since he just told Max a few minutes earlier, she was dead -_-). Mike simply blamed himself for her death (he said they needed her to save Will and even referred to her as a “weapon”). So when she died he felt the most responsible- and was hoping she was alive (and would answer his call) to alleviate his own guilt. Not because he loved her (that was an act). When he saw Will’s dead body, but heard his voice, he went on a rescue mission to save Will (from another dimension). But, Mike didn’t even bother going into the woods after seeing El outside his window (something he did for Will in ep 1, during a storm). And then in s3 Mike couldn’t even bother to call El and apologize- but ran to apologize to Will in the woods during a storm (bringing that whole parallel -full circle).

Plus, El told Mike, he treats her like ‘garbage’ and ‘a pet’ . And Finn after s1, said that the Duffers told him Mike thought of El as a puppy, and she is even compared to Dart (a demo-dog in s2). Mike asking Dustin, angrily “What, You have a bond? Just cause he likes nougat (eggos)?” A blatant dig at people obsessing over this shallow aspect of their relationship.

Bob and Mike parallels- the Rubik cube

Both are unathletic, smart, love comics, the only 2 to not treat Will ‘different’- and would do anything to protect their loved ones. And they also had crushes on Byers in childhood, and tried to give their Byers normalcy (despite them not being a ‘normal family’). They purposely display, and have Will -mirror Joyce- and Mike -mirror Bob- in multiple shots, throughout s2.

And both Mike and Bob are AV club leaders. Bob mentioned in one of the  earlier episodes  that he founded the Hawkins Middle AV club . And Mike later grabs Bob’s Rubik cube, and mentions this after his death (to solidify the connection- even if subconscious in our minds. He even proclaims after this “we can’t let him die in vain” . And this is when Mike makes the plan to help Will (before El shows up). 

gif credit: cath-avery, dailystrangerthings

[onisiondrama]

Killstream w/ Onision 3/30/2020 - Summary Part 3

Re-Upload 

Sorry this is taking me so long to get through. It’s almost 4 hours long.

(Unless specifically stated, everything written is from Greg / James’ words. Parenthesis are my notes/thoughts.):

Greg / James says he knew Hansen wasn’t going to do the interview because he has too much dirt on Hansen and he knew Greg was going to bring it up. His debts, his mistress, having someone kill themselves on his show, the way he showed up to Greg’s house when Greg has chronic depression just like the person that killed themselves- risking Greg’s life.

Greg goes through what happened with the Hansen interview: First Greg asked for a charity interview to be streamed on twitter in December, Hansen wanted it on his own channel, Greg now offered another interview and Hansen said no because he thought it would be on Only Fans, Greg said he wanted it on his twitter, Hansen wanted it on his channel, Greg said to demonetize it, Chris Hasnen tweeted he won’t do any conditions, then an hour later Hansen tweeted it will be demonetized, then Greg was like “fuck yeah I was able to control Chris Hansen”, Mike writes Greg and says it’s going to be pre-recorded, Greg says no, then Greg says you can pre-record it but he’ll livestream it on his channel, they were silent for a while, then Hansen said he wouldn’t do it because he did’t want to hurt the victim’s feelings. Keem guesses his attorney told him not to do it live to keep Greg from bringing up the dirt he has on Hansen.

Host reads from someone telling him to ask Greg why he asked underage fans to send pics in their underwear. Greg says you need proof. He says that doesn’t make sense because his forums were 18+ and appropriate images only and that doesn’t sound like an appropriate image. He wouldn’t ask minors for that. He denies it and says it doesn’t sound like him. (He did not start using an 18+ only rule on his forums until 2017. The Onision XYZ forums ran from October 2016 to May 2017. It had many underage fans submitting photos of themselves for Greg to use in his videos, some in their underwear. This forum had NO age restriction. This video contains clips of Greg saying there is no age restriction on the site and DEFENDING his right to rate the bodies of underage girls in their underwear.)

He says people will show other people asking for stuff on the forums and act like he’s asking for it. (This is true, people do do this. I am not a fan of using other people’s posts from the site against him. There is already a ton of video evidence out there of Greg rating underage fans’ bodies with pics submitted to the XYZ forums.)

Greg says you can use the Wayback Machine to verify it says 18+ only on various forums. (Yes, but only after XYZ was shut down in 2017.)

Host reads a tweet from Repzion asking about Greg’s statement on if you don’t report sexual abuse instantly, you are as bad as a rapist. Greg says he doesn’t remember this tweet. He says he tweets a lot of hilarious things. Greg says he doesn’t agree with it. (The tweets are here. They were from 2016 and 2018.) He says we all tweet stupid shit, but he doesn’t remember that. (He is pretending he doesn’t remember this, but he made an apology video about the tweets three months ago in January. The video is still up on Speaks.)

They all bring up the DMCA abuse. Keem seems particularly angry about that. Greg says if you talk to the right people at Youtube, you get access to cms.youtube.com, which flags your content for you when others use it in their video. When something comes up, Greg always tells it they can’t monetize his content. If they appeal it, he loses his power. Host asks then why does he do it. Greg says the system shows him content and he confirms if it’s his content or not. If he confirms it, the system will claim the video. If they fight it and Greg knows they are not using it in a way that isn’t fair, he gives them 7 days. They can get a copyright strike or talk to Youtube directly to have Youtube review it. Youtube almost always says they don’t know so the give it to the person who’s appealing it. Greg says if Youtube took it down, typically they reviewed it and saw it was stealing. Someone asks if Greg is denying he uses the copyright system to squash criticism of himself. Greg says no, that was never the point. He says he claimed someone the other day that was supporting him because he realized he can’t just claim people that don’t support him. Keem thinks this is hilarious. Greg says if he didn’t do it, he would be using it as a weapon. He says he’s glad he made that decision the other day so he could say that.

Keem asks about GamerFromMars’ theory that Greg found a way to survive on Youtube by becoming the most hated person, making sure people make videos on him that gets millions of views, then claim the videos to collect the revenue. (This is a really good question. I’m glad he brought this up.)  Keem guesses Greg is still bringing in $20k - 30k a month off the flagged videos. Greg says someone freaked out about losing $30 on a video about him that he claimed. Someone says that’s a big deal to some people. Greg says he thinks he made $1,000 off of claimed videos last month. Keem says he means during the prime, when everyone was making Onision videos. Greg says people reuploading the fake meltdown videos was some of the best earnings he’s made because people would reupload it and only change the sound so it was a slam dunk copyright case. He guesses he made $4,000 from copyright claims during that. They sound disappointed with the number. (Idk, to me getting $1,000 - $4,000 a month seems like a lot of really good side money to me.)

Greg explains the Madame situation. He says if she did bring it to court, all he would have to do is show he only made $100 and she used his copyright music. Says you can’t use copyright music, it’s common sense. Says this is an example of someone making a big deal out of copyright when it’s a slam dunk for him. He says it’s not worth bringing to court. Greg says $30,000 would be nice, but that would be worth bringing him to court over.

The host says he’s going to ask about the window incident. Greg says it’s about a little girl, so it should be off limits. He says you don’t talk about Keemstar’s girl. Greg says CPS and detectives investigated it and concluded it was an accident. He doesn’t understand why people question professionals. Keem says he’s seen people say they need their kids taken away because they weren’t watching her. Greg says then you’re calling the detectives stupid. Keem says kids get hurt and do stupid things. Greg says the level of injury was horrifying and they both didn’t know what to do.

Greg says CPS was called when Sarah was there because Sarah or somebody was being horrible. When they showed up, the lady checked that window to make sure it was working. He says after the incident, they couldn’t stop thinking about her checking the window and asking why she did that. They tried to position the room so no one could get to the window, but the kid stood on the back of the bed, put their pressure on the window screen, and the screen popped off. They now have locks on every window.

Greg says he was directly underneath when it happened. He was in the garage and he for some reason wasn’t wearing his headphones like he usually does. Kai was upstairs making dinner. He hears a deep voice, like his son’s. He thought he heard a toy car on the garage door. He was wondering what they were doing outside at 7:00 at night and it was getting dark. He walks upstairs and sees his son playing video games. He thought “what the fuck” because he heard that deep voice mumbling outside. Host asks what it sounded like. Greg says like indistinguishable “uhh uhh”, like humming or groaning. He says the Ring camera caught his reaction, which was horrible to watch. He had to show the detective. His brain couldn’t comprehend what he saw on the ground. It didn’t look like an animal, but it was covered in debris from the driveway and from the grass surrounding it. After a few seconds it clicks and he screams “call an ambulance.” He says he was panicking (he sounds like he’s about to cry for a second) he apologies. He said his kid was looking up to the left, frozen in place. He says the weird thing is the kid wasn’t near the garage door. They were a foot or two away. He says he still doesn’t know what it was that tipped him off.

He says it’s been pretty much a full recovery, but there’s still a little limp. He says they said everything should heal well and by the time they’re an adult you won’t even see that anything ever happened on the scull. He says a 7 year old fell off a golf cart around the same time and is now a full cripple. He says Kai was following that story online. He says the brain was swollen, but the scull didn’t crack so the brain had no room to expand. In his situation, the scull cracked so it gave the brain room to swell and the brain didn’t kill itself.

[kaspbrak-tozier-reddie]

#2 #45 Reddie please

#2 “Yeah, uh, alcohol doesn’t go in hot chocolate”

#45 “You’re kind of cute when you look like Rudolph” -“the reindeer?” -“No, my dentist.Yes, the reindeer.”

Send me festive asks

Festive prompt list

———————————————————————

“It feels weird, doesn’t it?” Richie asks his boyfriend.

“Yeah, it’s quiet,” Eddie admits.

“Never thought I’d say this, but I miss Stanley.” 

This Christmas it’s only going to be Richie and Eddie as the other losers were either snowed it in their cities or at the New York airport. Christmas is usually the only time they could all meet up and have a great time as a family since everyone’s parents are either dead or no longer talk (for obvious reasons). So this just leaves Eddie and Richie in their Seattle home to celebrate Christmas.

“Oh my goodness, you’re like Michael and Toby from the office,” Eddie groans and Richie cocks an eyebrow. “Michael hates Toby so when Toby comes back from long service leave or something, Michael goes apeshit.” 

Richie snuggles deeper into Eddie, whose focus is still trained on the tv, as he continues to read Bill’s latest novel. His opinion on Bill’s work is still that his endings suck but that’s because Richie often longs for a happy ending and Bill’s novels are far from it. Everyone either dies or a child/parent/pet dies, leaving a disappointed reader and a depressed protagonist. He loved the stories Bill told on their monthly sleepovers, when they were kids, in fact, everyone did but these stories were different, they were darker and more graphic. 

“Right I’m bored,” Eddie says after maybe the 4th Christmas Friends special. Normally Eddie would binge Friends, the Office or Brooklyn Nine-Nine but today was different. He desperately wants attention. “Richie!”

“What?” Richie mumbles still too lost in the book.

“I said that I’m bored!” Eddie whines.

“Why don’t we build gingerbread houses? We did buy two.” Eddie agrees only because he needs to fill the void of having no family (besides Richie) on Christmas. 

Christmas has and possibly, always will be, Eddie’s favourite holiday. It’s cold, there’s often snow, hot chocolates, gingerbread, Christmas movies etc. He couldn’t get enough, although what he hated the most was when they were kids, Richie was the Christmas Grinch. 

Richie always opts for Halloween over Christmas, the horror, dressing up, you name it. He loves it all. But when he asked Eddie to be his boyfriend 6 years ago, in junior year of college, Eddie was determined to make Richie love Christmas, or at least like it. Especially since Eddie goes all out. 

There was always Micheal Bublé’s Christmas album playing in the house, Richie hated it at first but had grown to love it. He now always jams to Jingle Bells and Silent Night with Eddie, who basically jams out to every song.

*

Eddie pretty much bounces off the sofa and ducks into the butler’s pantry, he pulls out the gingerbread house things and puts them onto the island bench.

“Coming Richie?” Eddie asks who’s now practically jumping for joy and eagerness.

“You’re like a 5-year-old!” Richie exclaims heaving himself from the comfort of the plush grey leather sofa. He stumbles slightly as he regains balance from sitting down for so long. “How do you want to do this?”

“Competitively.” Eddie bounces on the balls of his feet, Riche laughs at Eddie’s cuteness and as he walks over to him, he can’t resist pinching Eddie’s cheeks.

“You’re too cute Eds.” 

The two men gather up their chosen ingredients, sorting a shit ton of candy and chocolate in between their working spaces. Bowls clatter on the granite benchtop, butter knives are dropped into those said bowls with a mellow ding. Richie pulls out the icing sugar and butter to make the icing that will act like edible glue to hold the house together. 

“Eddie Spaghetti, why don’t you make us some hot chocolate while I get the icing done?” Richie asks and Eddie immediately shoots into action. The boiling of the kettle and the whipping of the butter and icing sugar starts to echo through the open tiled space. Eddie’s throwing open cupboard doors and slamming them with his excitement and adrenaline that’s pumping through his veins. 

Richie can only laugh as trying to calm down an excited Eddie is virtually impossible. There’s only so much that Richie could do to contain Eddie and that is trying to keep him occupied. 

*

The kettle whistles and Eddie is on his way trying to remember how Richie made his famous peppermint hot chocolate. Richie grabs the bottle of Bailey’s from the alcohol cupboard and pours a bit into each. “Yeah, uh, alcohol doesn’t go in hot chocolate,” Eddie explains.

“It does today, why don’t you start on your house and I’ll finish off the hot chocolate, I don’t want you to be bouncing and pouring boiling water,” Richie says softly. Richie could see that Eddie is starting to get overly energetic, he has never seen Eddie act like this since one time when they were kids. 

When they were 16 and having a sleepover at Mike’s house for Eddie’s birthday. Eddie had effectively had an entire bottle of schnapps that Ben had stolen from his mum’s collection. Eddie being already hyperactive was more clinging (especially with Richie) and wanted to play games until sunrise. It was obvious to Richie, at the time, that Eddie was 1) an affectionate drunk and 2) having a sugar rush. 

But what Eddie is doing now is completely different, Eddie has had no sugar or alcohol. Richie tries to think, how many coffees has Eddie had today? The thought passes Richie and hands Eddie his hot cocoa. 

“Eddie, how many cups of coffee have you had today?” Richie asks as he loads his knife with the icing sugar. 

“Uh, probably like 3, why?” Eddie replies.

“No reason.”

Just as he thought, caffeine high. That’s going to crash on Eddie in about 2 hours, at least.

Eddie decides he wants red icing, not the typical white icing. 6 drops of red food dye and Eddie isn’t exactly satisfied, so he adds two more drops and it’s slightly a bit redder. Richie can’t help himself, he sticks a finger into the bowl and places a dot of red icing onto Eddie’s button nose. “You’re kind of cute when you look like Rudolph,” Richie says and nudges Eddie’s shoulder.

“The reindeer? And I’m not cute!” Eddie huffs.

“No, my dentist.Yes, the reindeer.” The two laugh and continue on their competition.

****

A couple of hours later, the two finish their gingerbread houses and post them to Richie’s Instagram. Wanting to see who won, Richie creates a poll on his story to see which house wins. He also makes an apology to his friends who couldn’t be there for Christmas and hopes to do their traditions all over again when they can finally get onto a plane.

[stenbrozier]

Modern Losers’ Club Headcanons

Plot: Individual headcanons of the modern Loser’ about different things they’d do and love (mostly during high school)

Warnings: slight Reddie, shit ton of Stenburough, drug use + mentions of sex + swearing

——————————————————————————

Bill Denbrough:

~ He’s the artist, everyone knew that.

~Typical art kid who won all the awards and participated in every art class his school offered.

~ He just didn’t take choir or band because we know this boy has no musical abilities at all.

~ Bill would save up all his allowance and holiday money so that he could buy that really good drawing app that he could use on his IPad.

~ After he got it, there was no way to get him to look up at you for more than ten seconds. He would fall in love with digital art.

~ Remember he took all of the art classes? Well, creative writing and poetry we’re considered arts at Derry High School, so that’s where he fell in love with writing.

~ Suprisingly, he would be really into heavy metal. Bands like Bring Me the Horizon and Of Mice and Men would blare in his headphones while he drew in his room late at night.

~ Bill would also really love watching indie movies on Netflix and other platforms. He’s lowkey a movie buff, but he doesn’t tell people too much.

~ His favorite movie from the past decade would probably be Moonrise Kingdom (good movie!!) or The Skeleton Twins (also good movie!!)

~ Bill’s favorite book would 10000% be Turtles All The Way Down by John Green because of the main character and her battle with anxiety.

——————————————————————————

Mike Hanlon:

~ He runs a cooking YouTube channel, you can’t fight me on this one.

~ Mike would definitely have one of those motorized scooters, idk seems like a Mike thing

~ He’s in love with video games but only the ones that are based on a lot of skill. He doesn’t like first person shooters, nor does he like any games with violence at all. Tbh, Papa’s Pizzeria is right up his alley.

~ Mike would be a gym try hard, most definitely. But in every other class he’d just sit on his phone.

~ But he’s so smart that he’d pass all the tests anyway.

~ He’d work a lot just so he could afford the newest phone because he thinks it gives people less of a reason to pick on him and bully him. (News flash: it doesn’t)

~ Whenever Mike isn’t working, he volunteers at the animal shelter in Derry. He runs the Instagram account :)

~ Probably one of the guys who posts shirtless pics on Instagram because he likes the attention the girls give him in the comments.

~ Will answer any of Bill’s texts at 3am when he wants feedback on a new piece of art.

~ A secret theatre kid, no doubt. Not really a musical kid, but he loves acting and just being on stage with everyone’s attention on him.

——————————————————————————

Richie Tozier:

~ Speaking of theatre kids, Richie is the BIGGEST fucking one. He has been in every musical and play that his school has done since 6th grade, and he was one of the best kids they had.

~ He wears Pierce the Veil and Sleeping with Sirens shirts, but Richie mostly listens to softer bands like Arctic Monkeys and The Neighbourhood.

~ He has a bi pride pin on his backpack. Kids will sometimes pull it off and throw it around, but he just pulls another one out of a ziploc bag full of them in the tiny front pouch of his bag and sticks it on there.

~ Richie unapologetically owns a Juul and will sometimes let Bev borrow it as long as she pays him “25 cents a hit”, which she never does.

~ Posts music on SoundCloud. He’s not much of a singer outside of the musicals because he’s mostly shy with his talent; however, he does a lot of instrumentals.

~ Richie shops are thrift stores most of the time. He’ll take Eddie with him and though Eddie won’t touch anything until it’s been washed twice, Richie will buy him anything he likes.

~ He LOVES Harry Potter. He found the first book when he was younger and he just fell in love with the story. He owns all the first editions and all of the movies.

~ Goes to small venues to see bands that no one knows. Richie will go to so many concerts because he likes the escape it brings for him. He’s in his element when he goes to concerts.

~ Despite what many people think, he isn’t a whore :0 He just flirts a lot and he actually didn’t lose his virginity till he was 17 at a party. He regrets it, though, cause he was drunk off his ass.

~ He was also in the color guard for his high school’s marching band. A lot of the girls from the theatre stuff begged him to be apart of it because he could dance really well, and he ended up being in it for both the indoor and outdoor seasons all throughout high school.

——————————————————————————

Eddie Kaspbrak:

~ BOOKWORM, BOOKWORM, B O O K W O R M!!! This boy would spend every second he could just browsing the books that his school library had.

~ After he yelled at his mom for his pills, he started to kind of overcome his germaphobe tendencies, but he still was very iffy about touching things in places he’d never been.

~ For example, Richie took him to the park one time and he had never been there before, so the whole time he was holding his noses and steering clear of the snot nosed little kids.

~ Him and Richie definitely dated at some point or another. Whether to get a feel for guys or just for each other, but it did happen. Beverly was the only one who ever knew.

~ Eddie fell in love with engineering at school. He would always call one of the Losers at an ungodly hour in the morning and rant about how all of the buildings in town were built and with what materials. Honestly, Ben was the only one who shared this interest with him.

~ Eddie was the first to get his own car so all of the Losers would pile into his Jeep. Richie always tried to convince him to take off the doors, but Eddie thought that that was the biggest goddamn safety hazard he’d ever heard.

~ As they all got older, obviously him and Richie stayed close, but he also got surprisingly close with Ben and Ben would gush about Beverly to him after Eddie would excitedly explain how a car’s engine works or something like that.

~ Eddie was the one to convince Beverly to go after Ben and stop pining over Bill.

~ Eddie went to concerts with Richie all the time, and even if the sweaty roadies grossed him out, he fell in love with the bass killing his eardrums and the way the mic static could transform someone’s voice.

~ He also joined his school’s marching band (mainly cause Richie begged him) and was fucking AMAZING at playing snare drums.

——————————————————————————

Stanley Uris:

~ He was the last one to enter high school, everyone a year ahead of him, but he was ironically the most popular among the lower class men.

~ Stan was a very private person, but his willingness to do other’s homework for $5 a page made him infamous.

~ Because of all this money he’d been making, he’d buy the Losers presents all the time. He would treat them to their favorite snacks whenever they went to Keene’s or to a new shirt whenever they went to the mall over in Bangor. And he never went over budget because he’s a goddamn accountant by nature.

~ He had a massive crush on Bill and asked him to homecoming his freshman year. Yeah, they were bullied, but Stan couldn’t have been more happier.

~ Bill convinced him to tryout for the baseball team. He tried out for pitcher and got it immediately. He was also one of the sports kids who would post on his Snapchat whenever they had a game.

~ Him and Bill ended up dating up until junior year, when Bill admitted that he wanted to date at least one girl before college and Stan wasn’t mad because he honestly wasn’t feeling it anymore. Afterwards, they both started dating cheerleaders.

~ Stan was in Calculus his sophomore year of high school, which was the class that all of the AP seniors took. Many people called him a genius, he just thanked the internet.

~ Stan fell in love with indie bands like R.O.A.R and Florence + The Machines. Richie did, however, convince him to go to concerts with him and Eds. He might’ve not enjoyed the music, but he still loved being with his best friends since diapers.

~ He didn’t like movies too much but would watch them with Bill. He enjoyed TV shows a lot more. He’s definitely a true crime baby.

~ Stan also fell in love with photography because he was forced to take the class. He begged his parents to buy him a camera for his birthday, and his many cork boards were filled with pictures of his friends and birds.

——————————————————————————

Ben Hanscom:

~ Was a track start in high school. He ran off all of his fat and just fell in love with the high of running (tbh this is my favorite part about Ben’s character. like such a determined boy 🥺)

~ Ben enjoyed sitting at the library with Eddie and just watching him peruse books, usually pointing a few that he had read and liked. He also just loved the fact that him and Eddie were able to get so close as they got older.

~ Ben was in all the engineering courses his school offered. He was just so happy that he could take classes that pertained to the career path he wanted to go down.

~ He was able to finally get Beverly their senior year. He had been in love with her for the longest time, and she asked him to homecoming.

~ Ben also considered trying out for the football team, but it conflicted with the winter track season so he wasn’t able to; however, him, Mike, and Bill would always play their own small games in the field by Mike’s house.

~ While Stan helped everything with their math homework, Ben helped everyone with their history homework. He was a big history nerd, and everyone knew he paid attention the most.

~ He lost a bet one time and Richie was able to give him a stick and poke tattoo anywhere of his choosing. So now on the inside of his left ring finger he has R.T. written messily.

~ Ben loves pop music. He had always liked it, and some of his favorite artists were Katy Perry and Sia.

~ He rode his bike to school everyday. He was a very big proponent for the environment and hated the idea of driving, so he’d pass up the rides from Eddie or Richie and just bike with his headphones in.

~ Ben was apart of the school’s Green Team and protested climate change and the use of fossil fuels. When he had free time, he’d study ways that he could benefit the environment when he became an architect.

——————————————————————————

Beverly Marsh:

~ She was an English wiz. It was her favorite subject, and she fell in love with analyzing poetry and other forms of literary work.

~ Beverly started to let her hair grow out again and she was relieved to see that it started to grow out straight. She hated her curly hair.

~ She bleached her hair a few times throughout high school; she hated the red because it reminded her too much of her mother.

~ Her and Richie’s friendship fell off big time, but she got super close with Bill, Ben, and Mike. Her crush in Bill didn’t deplete for a while, even after him and Stan started dating. She still had hope.

~ Eddie told her about Ben and it really changed her whole perspective on everything. But that wasn’t until junior year.

~ Though she didn’t have too good of a singing voice, she loved being in choir. The angelic reverberations throughout the auditorium whenever they performed always gave her chills and she wanted so desperately to be a part of it.

~ Beverly wrote a lot of poetry. She wrote some to her friends, to her dead mom, to her asshole dad. Just to whoever she was focused on in that moment.

~ She helped Mike after school at the animal shelter and actually ended up adopting a kitten for herself.

~ Luckily, her dad didn’t mind the cat too much as long as Bev took care of it and didn’t bother him for a single thing.

~ Beverly didn’t get her license until she was well into her twenties, but she loved hanging her arm out of the passenger’s side window of Richie’s car and listen to the bands that he’d blast with closed eyes.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

My only problems with that bmc theory you mentioned is that 1) bmc was already really popular and 2) that’s kinda body shaming Roland :/ but yeah I agree that he can’t really sing for shit lol. And I hate how his go-to thing when he’s singing (it’s super evident in loser geek or whatever) is to just throw his arms out in a t pose

you should have problems with every part of that theory because everything in that post is about how the arguments are terrible and absurd, and i’m gonna use this opportunity to straightforwardly lay out why all that is, but first let me talk about the problems you did find with it

1) yes 

the off-bway run of bmc is unusual because it did (and existed because) already have popular support/demand. they absolutely had no motivation to try to increase its popularity. they already had that fully covered. 

2) yes

nothing wrong with having a preference or an attachment to the first portrayal you saw but there is no real reason to legitimately dislike or resent will roland’s performance to the degree that anyone wants to act like they have objective justifications for this. i will freely blame a ton of this on the fact that will r is not a super lanky guy who sort of looks like elijah wood’s fey woodland cousin or something, and he has a nasal voice, and the fact people find this less attractive leads to this extra resentment that gets rationalized as some kind of problem they have with his performance. surely i will come back to this but for now i’m going to argue against my own fake arguments

they didn’t approach will only because he was in deh and thus ~famous~ or famous by association or whatever. like i said in an earlier post, they were considering will for the part of jeremy even before will was considering himself for the part, as he said he didn’t consider auditioning for that role until it was suggested to him. and then he made it to callbacks, which means he was seriously considered and they already saw merit in the idea of casting him for the part. the fact that he didn’t get it doesn’t mean he wasn’t good enough: people Don’t Get The Part all the time and it isn’t for any certain reasons. for example, earlier will got cast in the black suits, while george salazar also auditioned and didn’t get cast, and yet we wouldn’t use this as evidence that george wasn’t necessarily good enough. not to mention that will would’ve been getting involved in deh at around that time of the bmc auditions, so evidently he was already good enough to be involved in like, any production.

also, the part of jeremy wasn’t the only change in cast between the productions. and they didn’t seem to leap on the opportunity to get Big Names involved, and in fact, they’ve said they didn’t want to do that. and, again, they did not need a popularity boost, they were in the unusual position of already knowing they had an audience. thus there’s no reason to believe that will’s casting, and will’s casting alone, was some sort of grab for increased attention on the production.

joe iconis had worked with will for years prior to 2018 and it’s just kind of ridiculous to suggest that will auditioned for his play and got turned down because he was terrible, and it’s only due to the fact that he was then cast in deh that made joe go “hm that roland guy can’t sing for shit and i’ve just been too polite to Not cast him in a previous musical of mine and work with him dozens of other times but he’s in a Popular Broadway Musical now so hmmm, maybe we’ll make a sacrifice to the quality of this show to get a popularity boost we don’t need” like

obviously it does not make sense. will was not Only offered the role because of being in deh. and, by extension, he was not offered the role in spite of any kind of inadequacy on his part. or in spite of anything at all.

also there is no indication that will connolly was just like, ditched or something. initial castings and casting changes are done for any number of reasons. and it’s not like joe iconis exactly has a reputation for ruthlessly screwing over people he works with, nor does will roland…and casting changes are basically inevitable if a show goes beyond one run or has a particularly long one. and it’s not unlikely people will have a preference or consider the first performance they see to be kind of the standard in their eyes, and there’s nothing wrong with the end of someone’s run / a casting change being bittersweet, cuz all of that is just how it’s gonna go. but like there’s no reason for animosity towards the replacement cuz then you’re gonna always hate everyone but the o(b)c

again like. maybe people really aren’t aware that will roland was cast in a musical of joe iconis’s back in 2012? the black suits? ben platt was there? george salazar wasn’t? will was 1/6th of the cast and did plenty of singing. and that was 3-4 years prior to him auditioning for bmc and getting the part for the off-bway performance, and as people tend to backhandedly point out, he only gets better with time and experience, and he was already doing great vocally in the black suits. he did that 2012 run, and then the run tbs had in 2013 as well. like, joe had plenty of experience working with him there. why would he think will is bad at singing.

also will was involved with joe’s work even prior to his graduation

will was also involved with bmc producer jen tepper’s work prior to his graduation. had a solo in the “if it only even runs a minute” show

they’d know how good will is. they had already been willingly involving him in various works for years, over and over, prior to will auditioning for bmc. the fact he didn’t get the part the initial time wasn’t due to them thinking he can’t sing, okay. and already right there you have the issue that apparently a bunch of randos figure they just have better judgment than the industry professionals. 

also, you can prefer will connolly’s voice, but it’s not even A Valid Argument to say that will roland is a bad singer. like, this isn’t even about opinion. he is a good singer and this is an objective statement. He Is Very Skilled. his vocals Are Good. this is not opinion it is essentially fact. you may not like them but to say he’s bad is just to say either you don’t have the first clue what you’re talking about or are willing to skew your own perspective or just say whatever to pretend to justify this preference as “one of these is the performance i like better and the other is a performance that is inarguably Bad and Incompetent”

one thing is that will is so good that he makes it seem easy. he pulls off shit that you don’t even have to recognize as taking a crapton of skill. there’s all sorts of performances of his available and the way he’s able to emote during his singing isn’t just his also-strong acting, but it also requires the vocal ability to deliver quick shifts and jumps between differences in volume and pitch and soft/fragile vs forceful/angry and that requires a ton of skill and control. speaking of control and the stuff i’ve just said, there’s also a lot of smoothness to his vocals and consistency which reflects not only the quality of his vocals but also the control and endurance and knowledge of how to handle a performance within individual songs but also an entire show and also a string of shows.

like, dunno what to tell you. like i said before, these industry professionals think he’s good enough. the people he work with think he’s talented. i put myself through reading bmc reviews and i don’t remember anyone saying anything suggesting will’s vocals weren’t up to par, but i do remember a lot of acknowledgments about the opposite and how his performance is stellar and showcases great vocal talent and ability, whether or not the reviewers took to the rest of the show as a whole. and yet people who are mad about him not being will connolly have the take that he can’t sing. pretty wild how the people who would probably know better than you or me all consider will roland to be a very strong singer!! must be because they don’t know as well as various random people who resent will r.

it’s just a bonus when people argue he can’t sing the high notes. i’m guessing i need to say it’s called a falsetto? he has a gorgeous one and the way he’s able to snap right into it is kind of breathtaking? and the fact that joe iconis wrote lgw Specifically For Will Roland’s Voice, specifically designed to showcase and play to his strengths? and that this song, written by a professional composer to be ideally paired with will roland’s voice, features that falsetto so generously? hmmmmmmmmmmm

like, there’s so many amazing and beautiful performances of his online and like every available performance kicks ass and is certainly Vocally Competent but like, if you listen to this and think “he can’t really sing for shit” then you’re just telling on your own flawed judgment n Shit Taste lol…..like, again, to say he can’t sing is objectively incorrect.

also, there’s this. 

i’m also very suspicious of people just interpreting his singing as “bad” because of the fact that his voice is just nasal. or suggesting that he can’t have as ~serious or dramatic~ impact. for unspecified reasons. but what i am going to specify as “because he has a nasal voice and i have an automatic association with this meaning that the character is unsympathetic and a joke”

i now slowly turn around and pull down a slide reading “jared kleinman”

again, not like the “will roland was only cast for clout” idea holds any water in the first place, but it’s just extra good how his character in deh seems to be written off by like, everyone, from reviewers to casual audiences to most more-involved fans of the show alike, and largely overlooked or maligned, despite all characters getting an equally sympathetic treatment, and all of the teenagers being very similar in what their flaws and weaknesses are and what their desires are. 

like i and other people and mike faist will tell you, yeah jared’s character provides a break from Heavier scenes into lighter tone, which is necessary for good pacing, but that doesn’t mean that the character and the things he says aren’t serious or genuine. watch me avoid going off into a longer tangent about jared and bringing it back around to will roland: it just Sure Is Interesting that the character is one that tends to be seen as unimportant or even dispensable despite being absolutely crucial to multiple elements of the play. hmm

and anyways it’s kind of funny that you’d really have to already be a fan of will’s to like, make his casting in bmc make you care about bmc if you hadn’t already (#me, lol) and like. otherwise it’d be like “hey this guy who’s in bmc was in deh” “oh really that’s neat” and maybe it’d make some new people pay attention, but not to the degree that it would like, be expected to carry the show’s sales or anything lol. plus uhhhhh haven’t noticed the marketing saying anything about WILL ROLAND of DEAR EVAN HANSEN and you’d think that if they’d deliberately cast someone who sucks just cuz he had a part in a well-known show, they’d uhhhh take advantage of that? and yet. 

that theory’s total shit is what i’m saying

and it’s interesting that will has a nasal voice and isn’t Serious Enough and his Singing is Bad

by interesting i mean total shit

i’m also totally gonna say that people are mad at will for not being super tall and super skinny and seeming attractive to them.

absolutely gonna say that. there is a real, documented bias towards considering someone seen as Attractive as being more sympathetic than someone who isn’t. for example i am tilting my head 270 degrees when anybody decides jeremy is an unsympathetic character. i am tilting my head 583 degrees when anybody decides that will roland’s performance as jared is the Unsympathetic one. my eyebrows are so raised they’ve just graduated college. 

just yknow people are mad at will roland b/c they don’t find him as hot as will c and resent him for not seeming attractive enough and like, there’s the people who will at least own this and insult him for being too ugly for their tastes and their inability to keep their shit to themselves, and then there’s people who also have this inability to keep their shit to themselves but don’t wanna say they think he’s too ugly for their tastes and will instead be like mmmm dunno the way he follows the written changes to the script is bad………mmmmm idk he just can’t sing ://…………mmmmmmm his performance isn’t the same so uhh fuck him for not being will connolly………………://///……….

i don’t know if anybody sees him as fat rn, there’s this window of being Average where i truly cannot see it even though its supposed to just be Objective Judgment territory. but that sure never helps. also he just doesn’t have the willowy fragile body type of will connolly’s at all, no matter what. and that also cannot ever help. couldn’t’ve helped when he played jared either.

maybe it’s an utter coincidence that the majority of his film roles, where your body and face are always gonna get hq closeups, and in which we also have audio of one’s nasal voice, have him as Nerd Types who aren’t meant to be particularly sympathetic. not saying this is all him being typecast based on being written off from certain types of roles as characters meant to appeal to the audience / win sympathy, except, my eyebrows have now finished grad school.

in fact, although the realm of live theatre may be more “”forgiving”” of these superficial traits, it’s not as though will’s roles haven’t been largely uncool losers in various ways lol…but all of them have been sympathetic. he’s even mentioned how being cast as a romantic lead way back in school changed how people saw him. and here he is in a role where he feels like he isn’t allowed to be the main character even in his own life, and where he feels that he can be treated Like a well-liked, attractive person, but not necessarily be one. will roland is out here just outright saying how lgw is about himself and about you and about me (and for trans and non-hetero fans) and people are really out here going “he’s ugly he shouldn’t have this role” like, i’ll freaking slap you, lord

again. loser geek whatever alone is evidence that the take that He Can’t Sing is objectively false. and it is. move on. love yourself

also just thanks for mentioning the thing about throwing his arms out. that’s just like, one of the peak examples of “i resent will roland for not being will connolly but i need to invent justifications for this” and deciding that totally arbitrary things about him are reasons to be annoyed by him, and thus to think that there’s anything actually wrong with it. like, so he has a tendency to gesture with both arms out whereas other people don’t always do this? you’re mentioning loser geek whatever and it’s pretty crazy how when you watch him perform the song he actually employs a variety of gestures and you’re just picking out the one thing he does and going “ugh god you’re killing me will roland” like god….of all the arbitrary inconsequential things to focus your dislike on and pretend it’s a Legitimate Critique, this one’s a classic. if anything it’s a quirk that puts an individual stamp on things in the midst of all the other ways he moves and gesticulates during songs, but yeah, i suppose you could just decide you hate it. truly, between will roland putting his arms out and the people who see this as some kind of real flaw, whose reach is greater……..

anyways the point is none of you have any real reason to be bothered by will roland, and every “oh my god he’s so incompetent” take is ridiculous, and at least the people who outright insult him based on appearance are being honest about their bullshit since it’s all insults anyways. the oc album is right there. the performance with will connolly also continues to be right there. everybody just might consider why they’re so resentful of will roland for having the part, and also consider getting over it.

[globrights]

iasip s12 rated by macdennis content

The Gang Turns Black: Mac and Dennis spend the entire episode together, getting arrested and put in an interrogation room with each other, and get to sing a DUET together. Charlie even ditches them at some point to go get their VCR from Dee’s place and they don’t care one bit because all they need is each other. Also features a cute bit where Mac leans back into Dennis and sings “I think we’re in The Wiz...” it’s all a dream but if you watch the episode you’ll be glad it was a dream. 7/10

The Gang Goes to a Water Park: They don’t have a plot together in this, but in the cold open Dennis brags about how he can enjoy his time at the water park for free, and is very impressed (”Nice!!!!!!”) when Mac reveals he laminated his admission bracelet and hasn’t even paid to get IN the water park since he was 14... also Dennis bonds with a little girl the whole episode by passing on his swindling ways which proves that he could definitely raise kids with Mac one day, albeit ones just as horrible as the both of them combined. 5.5/10

Old Lady House A Situation Comedy: While Mac and Dennis do interact in this episode, it’s never a one-on-one situation. Dennis does spend the whole episode trying to help Mac (and Charlie) with their moms supposedly being at loggerheads though (and makes a fake tv show out of it, in which he edits in some laughs for Mac when he says some classic, funny catchphrases), and is “outsmarted” by Mac when Dennis claims that he wants to cut Mrs Mac out of the show, and that there’s nothing Mac can do about it because Dennis is, as he so claims, a genius. Dennis then proceeds to eat his words when Mac places his mom in every shot, maneuvering her around so that her face can be seen in all the cameras. Oh, and also, Mac touches Dennis on the shoulder at one point, which is pretty sweet. 4/10

Wolf Cola A Public Relations Nightmare: This episode had its moments, but not macdennis moments. Boo. At no point were they sitting next to each other, which is a huge bummer. That being said, Mac does say the words “Now I’ve always been very passionate about dominating other men. There’s nothing like the feeling of another man submitting to your will. Now that’s power. In a lot of ways, that’s love.” Make of that what you will. 1/10

Making Dennis Reynolds a Murderer: There was a surprising amount of macdennis stuff going on in this episode, considering how it was a crime documentary accusing Dennis of murder. The first picture shown of Dennis in the episode is a picture of him and Mac, which Mac probably submitted because he looks happy in the picture whereas Dennis is a mixture of unprepared and irked—based on the picture it’s also fair to assume Mac put his arm around Dennis when he took the photo. Cute shit. Dennis also recounts how an average Friday night for him is spent watching a movie with Mac. In a later interview, Mac is introduced as Dennis’s best friend, and we proceed to find out that when they watch movies (or just Operation Dumbo Drop, at the very least) Mac likes to turn the volume down so that he and Dennis can make wiseacre remarks. They get into a squabble on camera about whether Mac stole this concept from Mystery Science Theatre 3000 or not, and about how funny Mac’s jokes are. Dennis gets annoyed and leaves, prompting Mac to whine “Wait, w-hold on, Dennis, D-don’t leave without me... Are you mad at me?” Cue sad music. Actual, sad instrumental music that the documentary plays. But sad music aside, it’s funny how Dennis complains about Mac and his supposedly unfunny played out unoriginal jokes yet still spends most average Friday nights at home watching movies with Mac. I see you Dennis, I fucking see you. 7.5/10

Hero or Hate Crime?: Mac comes out for real in this episode! Which is amazing in and of itself making this episode groundbreaking and perfect, but how does that play in terms of macdennis? Well, first off, through gay Mac macdennis is more possible, so jot that down. Second of all, Dennis looks INCREDIBLY offended when Mac tries to claim that he’s not gay, and then is the first one to start gently coaxing Mac to come out of the closet, by telling him they support him and that it’ll make him feel better. He’s also the first one to bring up Mac’s dildo bike, the renowned Ass Pounder 4000, and he also voluntarily brings it from the basement of Paddy’s all the way to where the arbitration is being held. Aside from all the touching of the dildo bike Dennis commits in transporting it, he also touches the bike a ton when Mac is explaining the “workout bike” to everyone. This includes leaning his hand, wrist, even his entire forearm on the bike handles, and wrapping his fingers around it, odd behavior for him to display seeing how Mac presumably fucks himself with the bike, and is reinforced as even weirder in a future episode where Frank and Charlie refuse to even so much as go near the bike. Dennis then proceeds to suggest that Mac penetrating his ass with a dildo bike is just a sexually devious thing to do, and has nothing to do with being gay (Dennis, what are you trying to tell us buddy? Just come on out and say it, we’re all in support). Yeah. Okay, and then when Mac comes out and leaves, and the gang decides to make Mac pay the arbitration fee, Dennis speaks up for Mac and convinces the gang to delay telling Mac where $9,986 of his lottery winnings are going, just so that he can have one triumphant, happy day of being out and gay. 6/10

PTSDee: “Is he blowing someone?” Right off the bat we have Dennis staring at Mac playing a game in Virtual Reality. Why do you care if Mac’s fake blowing someone, huh, Dennis?  Anyway, Dennis decides to become a stripper in this episode, which clearly has an effect on Mac, who’s suffering from fake war flashbacks from the game he was playing with Frank. After a traumatic dream about his father, he dreams of himself waking up and immediately looking for Dennis so he can tell him (and possibly seek consolation from Dennis) about his awful dream, only to see a half-naked Dennis dancing. Upon seeing Mac, Dennis walks up to him and kisses him, prompting Mac to wake up for real, and walk out to see the same half-nude, red-capped Dennis from his dream, actually dancing half naked. Dennis spots Mac and starts amping it up—he pulls off a few different moves—including one where he dances all the way up to Mac, slamming his hands on either side of the doorway Mac stands in, causing his eyebrows to rise in extreme interest, right before Dennis shuts the door because he’s a huge tease. This is definitely the most aroused/interested in something sexual that’s about to happen that Mac has ever been in the series, possibly his entire life. We thank Rob McElhenney for his service, and every single facial expression he produced in those scenes. This is the first explicit interest Mac has taken in Dennis ever since he came out, and it further confirms that Mac really wants to make out with Dennis (amongst other things). Later, Mac wakes up from a 35-second long dream five minutes after arriving at Frank and Charlie’s place, where Dennis is, so it’s easy to presume that he was looking for Dennis. And when Dennis talks about how he, Charlie, and Mike would be an elite stripping force capable of winning the “war against women” he so declared, he tries to invite Mac—who is asleep, sadly—to join them in stripping too. But who cares about all that, because really, all we think about for this episode is the kissing dream and the Dennis dancing for Mac scene, right? 9/10

The Gang Tends Bar: What a wonderful fucking episode. All ‘round beautiful, Megan Ganz truly is a treasure. Mac spends most of the episode trying to get Dennis to open this crate he has supposedly ‘found’. However, because Dennis spends most of the episode trying to get the gang to do their jobs for once on Valentine’s Day, a day he claims he does not want to celebrate or include as a theme in the bar the whole day, he refuses to play along with it, stubbornly bartending for most of the day, no matter what Mac says. This causes Mac, and the rest of the gang, to speculate over why Dennis is being like this. After Dennis orders Mac and Charlie to clean up the yuck puddle in the bathroom, Mac confides in Charlie, saying that he feels like Dennis has been acting distant towards him, he believes that Dennis is uncomfortable with him being gay and is trying to punish him for it, which Charlie disagrees with, because, duh, and says that it must be something else. Mac then theorizes that Dennis actually wants them to talk through their feelings because it’s Valentine’s Day, and that he’s entrusted Mac to do that because he’s a gay man, proceeding to reveal that he has a huge surprise for Dennis, which he feels Dennis is not emotionally available enough to receive at the moment. Later on, Mac brings the crate into the bar, and Dennis opens it to find that Mac’s gifted him an RPG for Valentine’s Day. This entire scene is a clear romantic gesture on Mac’s part, who gives Dennis the one thing he’s always wanted, despite also thinking (like the rest of the gang) that Dennis has no feelings and hates Valentine’s Day (he has also never given Dennis a Valentine’s Day gift prior to this moment). But as Dennis reveals in his most vulnerable moment on television, he does have feelings. Big feelings, at that. 10/10

A Cricket’s Tale: No. Nope. Nothing. Fuck this entire episode, actually, because not only does it completely drag down the quality of the whole season, it has no macdennis! Nothing! Can’t pull anything out of my ass, since this is technically set over the events of PTSDee and The Gang Tends Bar. The gang is barely in this too, and as I’ve implied, it just plain sucks. It’s the worst episode, and I might even go as far as to say that it’s the worst episode of the series. So Cricket, I love you, but fuck this episode for existing, and for creating a big drop in the macdennis momentum this season had going on. -4657348924385738492/10

Dennis’ Double Life: Apparently, Dennis and Mac had some bet to decide who got to redesign their old apartment, which Mac won. Very cute stuff, makes you trust, makes you think that this episode has got your back and isn’t going to stab you in the face, makes you think it makes up for the previous episode which will go unnamed. Cue Dennis having a son with Mandy, a girl he picked up under a fake identity back in North Dakota, and now he wants to get rid of her in case she tries to come after the bar for money. Mac and Dennis pretend to be a couple—or well, according to Dennis—two people who don’t have sex but are emotionally involved. Watching Mac be completely into pretending to be a couple with Dennis, claiming that they make love, bringing back lines from when they pretended to be a couple in season 5 (oh, those days), is equally heart breaking as it is heart wrenching. So it’s good, but also horrible, but also bad. After Mac enthusiastically volunteers to raise Mandy’s son as his other dad with Dennis, he wraps his arm around Dennis’ arm which is so sad because it all comes crashing down later. Mac tries to offer to sleep with Frank for $5,000 which Dennis stops because “you’re emotionally involved with me”, a strange thing to bring up because if Dennis can sleep with women whilst being in an emotional relationship with Mac, what’s stopping Mac from banging Frank for five grand? Jealousy (and some discomfort), that’s what. Also Mac claims that Dennis is his gimp. But at the end of the day, none of that matters, because Dennis up and leaves! He leaves Paddy’s, he leaves Mac, breaking his heart, my heart, and the entire state of Pennsylvania, probably. fuck u/10