#anyway i am super out of it this evening so if this make no sense or didn't actually have to do with the ask then i'm sorry

[cressidagrey]

Lightning in a Bottle - Prologue

Summary: 

Eira Archeron was neither a Valkyrie, nor a Seer, nor the High Lady of the Night Court. She was actually pretty much useless. The only thing she wanted was to be somebody's first choice for once in her life.

Also known as: Azriel's shadows decide that if he doesn't treat his mate right... they'll just do it for him.

Warnings: 

Kinda Elain Bashing?, Low Self Esteem, Mention of Cauldron induced torture...

(super pretty dividers by @tsunami-of-tears)

As far as cauldron-made went…Eira Archeron was pretty much useless. 

She had neither the power of Death nor of Divinity. 

She was neither the prettiest one, that title belonged to Elain…nor the smartest one, which was undoubtedly Nesta. Or the strongest one like Feyre…And if she had tried to hunt like Feyre, it would have been more likely that she would have accidentally killed herself instead of bringing home any meat. 

As a human, she had been limited to cooking and cleaning and laundry, all of it with limited supplies and even more limited experience. She had tried. It had never been enough. 

So maybe it shouldn’t have surprised her that her uselessness continued on even when she was no longer human.

So if she wasn’t beautiful or strong or smart…what was she then? 

The dumb one? 

When the cauldron had burned every bit of humanity out of her…when it had ripped away all her hopes and dreams…when it had been so angry with Nesta after whatever she had done to it that Eira was just…Eira was just an afterthought, something it could hurt in response to her sisters and then leave gasping on that stone floor feeling like she was dying…

She had done her best to accept her lack of humanity afterwards. Nesta had raged…Elain had said nothing, suffering silently in the bed…and Eira…Eira had tried. 

Tried to make it better…tried to make it easier for everybody around her. She had tried. 

She hadn’t wanted to put even more on Feyre’s shoulders, not with the threat of impending war…and so she had done her best to be supportive and make no trouble…be agreeable and quiet and be helpful…

But she couldn’t be helpful. 

She was nothing but a useless appendage. With no powers, no great destiny stretched in front of her…

Not even a limb. Not even a fucking pinky finger. 

More like a skin tag. 

Completely useless. If cut off, it wouldn’t even bother anybody. 

They had made that clear to her over time. 

They had made clear what they thought about her, again and again, and now…now she finally realised it. She was a slow learner…but by the gods, she did learn. 

It started…slow in a sense. Comments, made offhandedly, that probably weren’t meant that way anyway…sometimes said to her face…sometimes overheard. 

“Stop your screeching, girl, I am getting a headache.” Amren. After she had finally…after months felt like singing again as she fixed the hem on one of her sister’s dresses. She had stopped singing then.

Amren had never brought it up again. But then Amren had never been particularly nice to any of them.      

“Don’t come crying to me if she bites off your head. I warned you.” Rhysand had told her drily when she insisted on visiting Nesta at the House of Wind every week after all of that had gone down… 

“Don’t you have anything better to do? Like make another ugly dress?” Seethingly said by Nesta…pitted against the one thing she liked to pretend she was good at…the one thing she could do and make money with…

It cut. Of course, it did. But it wasn’t even the worst thing thrown at her head by Nesta…so why was it the one thing that stayed in her mind? 

“We don’t need Eira. Quite frankly, it’s better if she doesn’t go. Elain is the prettier one, anyway.” Cassian…overheard by Eira before the rest of them had gone off to Hewn City. Eira left behind because…well the contrast of Elain badly dressed was enough, no need for Eira to…be what? A distraction?  

And it was true too. Elain was the prettier twin sister. 

Eira was just…common as muck as her mother had liked to remind her…Nesta was the smart one, the one who would marry a prince…Elain would marry for love and beauty…and Eira…well, she would make a good farmer’s wife as far as her mother was concerned.

Not pretty enough to garner a richer man’s attention…not smart enough to drag herself up the echelons of society on her own…To easily content as far as her mother was concerned. 

“As far as cauldron-made goes, she is pretty much useless.” Morrigan. Said in jest. Eira was quite sure of that…still, it had hurt. Because it was true. She was useless. 

No magic sparking at her fingertips…Using her magic was like pulling teeth…painful and a long process…And it never did what she wanted anyway. 

“Eira, find somewhere else to be. I really have more important things to do,” Feyre had said with a sigh…after she had brought her sister cookies and tea…after she had only tried to get Feyre to take a break from her work. 

Eira hadn’t tried that again either. 

And then the one that clinched it: 

“At least I found two males in my life willing to marry me. The one you have your ridiculous puppy crush on is never even going to look at you!”

Said by Elain…by her twin sister. She was frozen in place, staring at Elain wide-eyed as her sister sneered at her. 

 That was the last drop into an already overflowing bucket. 

Stress. Right? Just stress from wedding planning. Elain would have never said that usually. 

She wouldn’t have…

It was just…it was just stress…Just stress. 

Elain didn’t mean it like that. 

Right?

Elain flounced off…her wedding binder in tow…leaving Eira alone, sitting there, in the dining room, her chest aching. 

Eira was in a trance as she carefully put all the plates into one tidy stack…as she was thankful that it had just been her and Elain, every other person in their family busy with their mates or something else…Feyre and Rhysand gone with Baby Nyx for the evening…Nesta and Cassian off at the House of Wind…who knew what Mor and Amren were up to…

Or even Azriel. 

A sob threatened to take over, as she thought that name. 

She walked up the stairs…to her room…Her room. She locked the door with shaky hands. 

“At least I found two males in my life willing to marry me. The one you have your ridiculous puppy crush on is never even going to look at you!”

She collapsed on her bed, burying her face into her pillow and let the tears stream. 

Ridiculous puppy crush. 

All of that said because she had tried to talk to Elain about her choice of flowers for her wedding. Because lilies wouldn’t be in season when she married Lucien in Day Court in less than 2 months. 

And then Elain responded with that, because Eira clearly wanted to ruin her wedding with that factoid. 

“At least I found two males in my life willing to marry me. The one you have your ridiculous puppy crush on is never even going to look at you!”

The worst part of it was that it was the simple truth. 

Azriel was never going to pay her a second glance. 

He had always been more interested in Elain than Eira…he had on more than one occasion asked Eira questions about her twin sister…had made sure that Elain was comfortable and cared for…and Eira had sufficed as a source of information and nothing else. 

And after Elain and Lucien had become serious…well, Eira ceased to be interesting too. He hadn’t sought her out again. 

If she sat next to him at dinner, he was polite and quiet, bordering on silent. And then she tried to fill the silence and probably only annoyed him in the process. 

He didn’t want her. He never would. 

She starved down the sobs that wracked her body. 

It was probably high time that she accepted that, right?

High time to get over herself. 

High time that she reminded herself that…that she was never going to have him and that staring at him in ill-hidden affection only made everybody else make fun of her and probably made him deeply uncomfortable. 

So maybe it was better that she just…

At least he had never called her useless, she supposed. It could be worse…even when he never would want her. 

She felt the touch on her hand first…soft like velvet…like kitten fur…never warm, never cold. massive and somehow not… definitely not human. 

The shadows. His shadows. 

Sometimes they came to keep her company. At the start, she had thought that maybe he had sent them but nowadays she was quite sure that they had just liked her quiet singing while embroidery one afternoon. So quiet that nobody would hear.  It had taken her months to coax them out of their corners after that. They probably had just taken pity on her. 

Just like they did now. 

“Please don’t,” she choked out. She never wanted him to find out how she was feeling about him…never wanted to feel the pain of him outright turning her down. 

 And if his shadows came to check on her, they would report back in what they saw…and they didn’t need…didn’t need to worry about it. 

They never talked to her. Just sometimes they came and listened to her softly talk to them while she was sewing in the evening, about this and that...

It wasn’t right how she talked to you, the shadows whispered. 

They didn’t talk to her. Never. 

And now they did. 

Hell, even his shadows were feeling sorry for her, weren’t they? 

“Please don’t tell him,” she begged. 

He should know, they disagreed softly. Everybody should know. She should apologise to you. 

And what would that give her? Nothing. More embarrassment because everybody else got to hear all about her fledgling little feelings? Feelings she should bury deep and never examine again? 

“Please,” she begged again and the shadows seemingly surrendered, curling themselves up against her hands so that she could touch them. 

Don’t cry, they soothed her softly. Don’t give her that. 

Elain hadn’t said anything that was untrue. That was the worst part. It was true. And that hurt. 

Is there anything we could do? the shadows asked Eira softly. Anything at all to make this better? 

“No,” she whispered, choking out the words, another sob. Not anymore. There was nothing anybody could do. 

It hurt. It hurt so badly.  Just like the cauldron had.  Then she had wished she would die. 

Now…now she wondered the same once again. Maybe then it would stop feeling like this. 

She cried her eyes out, as the tears kept pouring over her cheeks…as she sobbed until her throat was raw and everything hurt. And finally, she just laid there…the shadows still swirling worriedly around her prone form. 

“Don’t you need to work?” she asked the shadows listlessly, tears tracking over her cheeks. “Don’t you have something more important to do than to try and comfort me?” 

Maybe take care of him?

You are important, the shadows snapped. 

Eira could argue that point. She was useless. So what did it matter? It didn’t. 

She wiped away the tears, but new ones just came pouring over her face and she stopped trying, let them run down her face and wondered how long she could stay in her room and never come out again. 

Would you like something to eat? the shadows tried again. So sweet. Trying to give her something, anything to comfort her. 

“No, thank you,” she whispered. Alone the thought made her want to throw up. 

She didn’t want to eat. 

She didn’t want to get up and talk to anybody. She didn’t want to even look at another person anymore. 

She didn’t…

What would you like then? The shadows tried softly. Would you like to plot revenge? they suggested. 

It was so stupid that she choked out a laugh. 

“For what? Elain saying what everybody else is thinking?” Eira asked, her heart painfully restricting. 

Nobody here actually wanted her around. If she disappeared forever she would do them a favour. Him especially. 

Elain had only said what everybody else was thinking. 

All three of her sisters had found their mates, just not Eira. All three of her sisters had some kind of power…just not her. All three of them had found some kind of place for themselves…and then there was her, living with her youngest sister, half seamstress, half nanny for her child, an unwanted appendage that was taken care of out of some feeling of duty and no other reason.

Elain had just voiced what she was thinking. The truth. 

It had been the truth. Plain and simple. And Eira maybe didn’t like to hear it but it didn’t…it didn’t matter. 

It was the truth. 

Elain had two men willing to marry her and spend the rest of their lives with her…and nobody wanted to spend any time with Eira. A husband wasn’t even something that had ever seemed to be a possibility. 

Even if everybody else is thinking, that doesn’t make it right. The shadows disagreed quietly. Your sister said that to hurt you and not for any other reason. 

“She’s stressed out with wedding planning,” Eira whispered. 

It had just been that. Probably. Maybe. 

That doesn’t make it right, the shadows disagreed again, twirling tighter around her wrist. We could ruin her wedding. Lilies and all, they suggested brightly. 

She shook her head. No. Elain should have the wedding she dreamed of. Eira wasn’t going to ruin it for her. 

“Don’t do that,” she said weakly.

We could at least steal her wedding binder, they told her mulishly, and Eira wondered if they disagreed like that with Azriel too.

Azriel…

What did it say about her that she fell head over heels in love with the first man who treated her with polite indifference? That she was so desperate to be loved that that was all it took? 

Did it matter? 

No. 

Elaine was right. He would never spare her a second glance. He was just as unreachable as any other male.

Nothing was enticing about Eira.  Neither her body, nor her mind, nor her magical power. What could she possibly offerany male? 

All the nightmares she had on a near-daily basis? All the fear and anxiety that swirling around her gut every day? 

She could sew on any buttons he lost along the way, she supposed. That was something.

The knife that plunged into her womb and twisted, took her by surprise. 

It shouldn’t have.  

Of course. 6 months had passed once again. 

“Don’t tell him this either,” she begged in a whimper. This was too embarrassing. He didn’t need to know about her cycle. 

Nobody did. She was the most modest out of all her sisters. The one with the most human ideas of what was considered to be decent, left…the only one who…

The only one left with her maidenhead intact, because everybody else was mated or married or very much in love and it had never mattered in Prythian anyway. 

Just Eira was left. 

Without a mate. Without a husband. 

Without ever having even been kissed. Nearly 26 and that…hadn’t happened for her. 

It probably would never happen anyway. 

Why today of all days? 

Why did her cycle need to torture her today?  How did she deserve this? Why not in a week…Though at least now she had a reason not to leave her bed for a few days.  

She could just stay here. 

Mope in her own Misery and self-pity…wallow in the pain that she knew would come…

Of course, it would. She had always had a horrible time during her cycle even as a human…as a Fae, it had become her very own personal torture. 

Maybe a bath would make you feel better, the shadows suggested softly as she already curled herself together in pain. 

She needed to get up and sort herself out before it got even worse…made sure that she wouldn’t get blood all over the sheets, but she couldn’t…She didn’t want to. 

And a bath…A stab of pure fear.  

“It’s like the cauldron,” Eira whimpered. Just like the cauldron. 

She didn’t bathe…she used buckets of water…even years later…still standing water was not something she could stand. Not without being reminded of her humanity being ripped away and traded for whatever this existence was. 

What if we make sure that it isn’t? the shadows asked her softly. It will be nothing like the cauldron, we promise. 

A bath…a hot bath that would help against the soreness of her muscles…that would maybe ease the cramps…

It did sound nice. So nice. 

So Eira just weakly nodded. 

That seemed to be all the agreement the shadows needed as they whisked her to the bathing chamber, in the blink of an eye.

She watched as they flitted about the room, turning on the water, dotting candles around the room, making it brightly lit with faelight and candlelight both. 

Lots of foam and bubbles appeared in the bathtub as well as numerous concoctions being poured into the water. 

She slowly toed off her shoes and opened the laces of her dress. Eira hesitated and the shadows disappeared, letting her undress in privacy…letting her walk to the bathtub and test the temperature…stare at it for a moment. 

It couldn’t look less like the cauldron if it tried. 

She waited for a stab of fear but nothing came. 

So she slid into it, let the warm water envelope her, the perfect temperature… A few tendrils of shadows came to keep her company, touching her chin so that she tipped her head back and they started to wash her hair for her. 

Eira couldn’t even remember the last time anybody had done that for her. 

And they did that…without even asking…just…just for her. 

“Thank you,” Eira whispered, not daring to close her eyes, but staring at the ceiling. “Are you sure you don’t have anything more important to do?” she asked weakly. “Isn’t your master going to be angry at you?” She didn’t want them to get into any trouble, just because they…they were taking care of her. 

You don’t want Master to find out, so he won’t, they said easily. Would you like some pain potions? 

If they gave them to her, she wouldn’t need to walk downstairs and maybe face her sister or gods forbid, Rhysand…and ask them for Madja. 

Nobody would need to know. She could have her privacy and her dignity left intact. 

“Yes, please,“ she breathed in relief as the shadows poured something or other over her head. One shadow brought her a vial, wrapping around her wrist as she uncorked and downed it. 

A bitter taste but it left her blissedly numb and tired nearly immediately.

“What’s that?” She mumbled as they hushed her, massaging her head.

It tasted differently than whatever Madja usually gave her…telling her that pain and discomfort were normal and that her potions would ease it…It was like pouring a bucket of water over an inferno. 

While this…this was quenching everything. Leaving her numb. 

Just a rather strong pain potion, the shadows promised her. You’ll sleep for a bit…We’ll talk more then.

Sleep… Sleep sounded nice…

She didn’t even think about feeling self-conscious when they pulled her from the water, rinsed her off and wrapped her in warm, fluffy towels. 

They laid out her favourite nightgown so she only needed to pull it on and pull back the sheets of her bed so she could slide beneath it. 

Even a hot water bottle was waiting for her…

Everything so that she would be as comfortable as possible… everything for her.

“Thank you,” she whispered, tears pricking in her eyes as she climbed between her blankets, the shadows fluffing her pillow and pulling the blankets as high as they went. 

It was weird…to have the shadows doting on her, but she couldn’t find it in herself to care. Eira was too selfish to protest this bit of attention…the only positive attention she had in years. 

They promised not to tell, so she wouldn’t either. Not when this was the sweetest thing anybody had ever done for her. 

She fell asleep between one breath and the next, safely and warmly ensconced in her bed. Deep dreamless sleep…When she woke, it must have been the middle of the night…and still, the shadows were there immediately. 

She whimpered at the cramps that were ransacking her body…and the growling of her stomach in hunger. 

She hated these cycles. Hated how weak they left her and how she wanted nothing more than to cease to exist. 

Are you hungry? You’ll need to eat before you can take another pain potion, the shadows told her worriedly. Not a lot, just a little bit, they promised. 

“I don’t want to go down into the kitchen,” she answered weakly, biting her lip. Not that she thought that she could safely traverse the staircase anyway. 

Eira just wanted to stay here…alone. Maybe with the shadows for company, as long as they wanted her…

We’ll get you something. What would you like? They assured her immediately. 

Everything in her body ached for something human, even when she knew that their food would taste like ash for her. She always wanted human things. The things she would never have again.  

“Maybe some soup?” Eira asked finally. “If that’s not too much trouble?” 

Of course not. 

They fluffed her pillows and helped her sit up…and then soup appeared…a bowl filled with clear broth with bits of vegetables and chunks of chicken and noodles…cooked to perfection…better than anything she could have ever produced and by the gods, she had tried…All of it, arranged on a tray, with two slices of perfect crusty bread and another pain potion. 

She took that first, and it made her pleasantly numb and tired…and so she weakly spooned as much soup as she could in her mouth afterwards… mopping up the last of her soup with the bread. 

She finished as much as she could before she was too tired and the shadows tucked her back into bed, curled up on her side…so they could fuss with her hair which was a mess as always. 

She felt like a child being fawned over and she couldn’t help but relax into it…let them do with her whatever they wished if they just kept being so…nice to her. 

Feeling better? they asked softly and she hummed. 

If you could be anything…do anything... what would it be? The shadows wondered quietly. The movements of them were lulling her to some space of safety and warmth and Eira considered the question. 

If she could have anything in the world…what would she want?

A heady question. 

“When I was…young,” she said softly… “I wanted a dashing knight to come rescue me, and whisk me away from that horrible cottage,” she said weakly. “That’s what I wanted since I was old enough to want anything.”

A stupid children’s dream. 

But sadly there were no knights in Prythian and even if there were any, they wouldn’t pick Eira. 

And now? The shadows pushed. 

“Somebody that loves me,”  she admitted quietly. “A husband…children.”

All of that…she wanted all of that. 

And she was never going to have it. 

We could find you a husband, the shadows finally said quietly. If that makes you happy…we could help you.

“Who could possibly want me?” Eira asked, her voice breaking. Who would want her? The answer was easy: Nobody. 

Only because Master is an idiot, doesn’t mean every male is, they told her tartly. 

She wanted to laugh but it ended in a sob. 

“He isn’t an idiot,” Eira disagreed. “He just knows that…I am not good enough for him.”

Not pretty enough, not smart enough…not enough period.

That’s ridiculous, the shadows hissed. 

It wasn’t. 

“He’s in love with my prettier twin sister,” Eira snapped. “I shouldn’t want him anyway. Why should I want to be his second or even third choice?  Maybe for once, I want to be somebody’s first choice! Maybe for once, I want to be treated like I matter! That my feelings matter…that I matter!” It burst out of her. The tears burned in her eyes at that admission. At…how unfair it was. 

What had she done to deserve this? What had she done? 

Eira immediately regretted that outburst though. “I am so sorry,” she blurted out.

They didn’t deserve to be pulled into her feeling unfairly treated. She should stop complaining. It wasn’t going to…

For what? the shadows snorted. You are absolutely right. You deserve to be somebody’s first choice. You deserve to be treated like you matter. 

She didn’t. 

Maybe you should go shopping, the shadows suggested with a sigh. The suggestion was so sudden that she stared at the tendril of shadow still wrapped around her wrist. 

“Why?” she asked with a sigh. 

The Morrigan does that if she feels bad. The shadows told her earnestly. Then she buys shoes and feels better. 

Ah. 

She highly doubted that shoes were going to solve any of her problems. A pretty pair of shoes wasn’t going to make anybody fall in love with her. Or want her. 

“What am I supposed to buy?” She asked quietly. “Just shoes?”

Stuff. The shadows answered easily. Whatever you want. Whatever makes you happy, they assured her. All your sisters have more stuff than you. You make them dresses and other things. But you never make yourself anything, the shadows said quietly. Nobody would say anything if you wanted things that are yours. 

Right. She had never bothered with that. Not after she had lost all her things together with her humanity…there had been some piles of necessities sent to them by Rhysand…and that had been that. 

She had never bothered to get more than that. She still wore those dresses of the very first weeks… and while she had made dresses for all three of her sisters…as human out of necessity, as Fae out of habit…she hadn’t made herself any in years.

Not since becoming Fae. Her new body felt…she hadn’t wanted to look at her new body for long enough to figure out how something should fit onto it. How it had changed….

These godforsaken ears were enough. 

Buy things for yourself. Like a new dress! Or earrings! Diamonds! The shadows suggested. Whatever you find pretty. 

“My ears aren’t pierced,” she said quietly, a yawn taking over her face. 

That brought them up short.

Master bought you pearl earrings, the shadows said suddenly, sounding perplexed. 

He had. Beautiful. Impersonal. Unwearable for her…a far cry from all the little trinkets he had given to Elain…

Still, for months she had stared at them and found them oh so beautiful…safely kept in their box in her drawer at her vanity table. 

Maybe that alone should have told her everything she needed to know about the state of Azriel’s affection for her. 

Namely it was non-existent when the spymaster of the night court didn’t even bother to check if she even wore earrings. 

And the earrings…well…they were only…one thing. Her room at the River Estate that she had been supposed to furnish to her liking…that was another. 

In the end, it had consisted out of her getting a set of the same bedroom furniture as every other guest room and her walls were painted cream like in every other room Feyre hadn’t gotten to yet. It was still as impersonal as it had been when she had moved in. 

She knew that Elain had stuff to litter her bookcases with…gifts from Azriel or Feyre or Lucien, her mate…even Eira had gifted her sister things. 

But all Eira had…were the dresses she had on commission laid out on her desk. Which she would need to return to the shop where she worked as a seamstress at soon enough once she was finished with her alteration on them…and well, that was it. 

No books, because her reading was absolutely atrocious…no little trinkets from any of her sisters…no paintings or art or anything really. 

Just…her sewing and embroidery supplies and that was that…and even these weren’t…held in one of these pretty little wooden sewing boxes on legs that would keep them tidily kept away…

Do you need money? The shadows asked her seriously. 

“What?” Eira asked weakly.

She made some money with her job. Not a lot…but some. All of it carefully stashed away to buy birthday or solstice gifts from…or little trinkets she saw in a shop and thought one of her sisters would like…that Nyx would like. 

Do you need money? They repeated patiently. To buy stuff? For yourself? 

“No, I have money. And I don’t want to owe anybody anything,” she answered quietly, her eyes slowly closing.

 She didn’t want to end like Nesta… were in the end, her habits were used to bludgeon her with…she didn’t…

You wouldn’t. The shadows assured her. We have our own line of credit. 

What? 

“How does that work? Do you have your own bank account?” she asked curiously, and she could nearly feel their amusement. 

We like playing the lottery. Everything we win, we put into Master’s Bank Account, they explained to her earnestly. He never uses it anyway. We could just put our winnings in yours instead. Master wouldn’t care.

It was so ridiculous that she couldn’t help but giggle. 

“Really?” she still asked weakly. 

Really! they assured her seriously. Enough for you to have a shopping spree! We like shiny things, they told her, making her laugh. Master never buys any. We’ll pick up some mail-order catalogues for you and then you can spend tomorrow ordering some things. Maybe some curtains to spruce things up a little. It’s awfully empty in here. 

Still, she couldn’t help but ask. 

“Why are you doing this?” 

Nobody should be treated like you are, they told her fiercely. Nobody should feel like they have no place anywhere.

[ebonysplendor]

TOUCHSTARVED (Demo) 💔🫴

TL;DR: People are always saying "Touch grass" but even that might be dangerous in this scenario. If you thought Mike Tyson's hands were lethal, wait until you find out how our hands work.

Game Link: https://redspringstudio.itch.io/touchstarved

Notable features: Self-Insert, Multiple LIs, DnD vibe, MC backstory selection, Multiple endings/routes, Choice-Heavy Spiciness: 3.5/5 -- Nothing too explicit and no sex scenes or anything like that, but it does get pretty suggestive and there's some flirty jokes and comments here and there, especially with one particular LI LI(s) Red Flags: ...I mean, aside from one of them being a suspiciously smooth talker and the other essentially implying that they'd corrupt us, the biggest red flag is one of them having the cleanest pickpocket skill in history

Wanna know more? Meh, there's not an age limit, but the game pages does say it's for older audiences so, me personally, ... I'd say at least sixteen, but the older, the better. Anyways, let's get into it!

Okay, I'm sorry, but I have been coming across some damned gems lately!

Once again, this was one of the visual novels I downloaded forever ago, and what the heeeeeell, this was so good! Like, no, it was REALLY damned good. I'm not going to get into my ranting and raving like I tend to do because then the intro will get all long, but just know that, once again, I am geeked. Like, why have these game developers been going in so hard lately?!

I honestly have so much more to say, but I really want to get to the summary and the review portion, so I'm going to half-ass this intro and leave it here. That being said, this is NOT a yandere visual novel; however, it is a dark romance visual novel, so, it's still not the super teeth-rotting, cutesy, fluffy stuff.

Anyways, I'm going to tell you as much about the game as possible without ruining the game itself (like usual). Be mindful that, because it's a demo, there's not really an "end" nor is it even leading up to the end. The best way that I can qualify the demo is deadass...a demo. Like, it's a literal introduction and acts as a showcase to the rest of the game. More accurately, it flows exactly like how you'd think the prologue to a story would, "Chapter 0", honestly speaking.

Anyways, I'm done yapping; let's summarize. Just a heads up, though, it's gonna be a little lengthy, so...get comfy. All right, now let's get into it.

So boom.

In the spirit of keeping things as brief as possible: We're cursed, and that curse flows throughout our hands, front and back; it is for this reason that we keep them completely bandaged to ensure our own safety (kinda) and for everyone else's sanity. We believe that we can find a cure in this city called "Eridia", which is known to be this city of vast knowledge, and within this city of vast knowledge is this place called "Senobium". Senobium is where we're hoping our answers lie.

Lmao, I know that's a hell of an opener, but that's quite literally what's going on. We have been cursed since the start of forever, and we're essentially tired of feeling no sense of belonging anywhere, so we're trying to fix that; however, shit goes very left, very fast.

As we're on the way to this oh so great city of knowledge, we get hit with this ominous fog, and everyone who's travelling with us immediately knows: this is not good. No sooner than later, we're pretty certain that we hear someone getting killed nearby and the carriage that we were in is suddenly flipped over and blood gets shed very quickly. As expected, and for plot purposes, when the carriage got flipped over, our ankle took some extra damage which makes running a very unlikely option. Because of this, this terrifyingly dangerous creature wastes no time approaching us. Wanna see what it looks like?

That, my friends, is what is referred to as a "soulless", and it can rip you to literal shreds within seconds.

For whatever reason, this thing darts past us and disappears into the mist, but we don't ask questions; we just bolt behind the carriage for cover, and we're thankful that there is still someone alive after the attack. It would be much more comforting, though, if the guy wasn't praying, because that meant either one of two things:

We were very much so fucked, and he was trying to put in a good word for himself real quick before he potentially met his maker

or 2. We are very much so fucked, and the only thing that is applicable in this scenario is to pray and hope it disappears

but either way, we are very much so fucked.

That being said, we simply can't accept that. We don't pray, because we don't have the time. We've literally come too far to get taken out right outside the very city that holds our salvation, and that's all the reminder that we need when we see those city lights through the haze.

That reminder doesn't last long, though, because remember that soulless that vanished? Well, it came back, and the guy that was praying essentially brushed up against our hand, trying to get us to dip out with him because, duh, situation kind've popping off. Now, you remember that curse I mentioned? Well, our bandages kind've tore off during all of this ruckus, and all it takes is the slightest touch to make a person go from this

to this.

Yeah, so...not good.

Anyways, the situation essentially keeps escalating until we're one hit point away from death...but it never happens, because the next time we open our eyes, we see him.

Maybe we are dead, because hello~! Lookin' like an ethereal being in all of that white and attractive features! Like, gyatt DAMN. That is one fine ass angel!

Honestly, there are a lot of guys, and a lot of swooning, and a lot of introductions, so I'm going to kind've rush through those parts, especially since I don't want to ruin too much.

So, to get back on topic, essentially what goes down is that he -- his name is Kuras, by the way -- found us pretty much dead where the attack went down and brought us into the city to treat us. Now, this isn't because he's a hero or anything, but because he's a doctor and helping and healing is quite literally his entire thing, and damn, did he heal the hell out of us...suspiciously so.

Kuras tells us that, in Eridia, knowledge and secrets are what really fuels the area because it's so valuable. That being said, he can't get into exactly how he healed us so damn near perfectly. That also being said, he pretty much implies that the Senobium isn't all that's cracked up to be and that we aren't likely to find what we need there. Now although, we aren't fully believing of this due to desperation, he does point us in the direction of someone else. Some guy named Leander that we can find in some place called "The Wet Wick".

We follow Kuras' directions...but who the hell is--

--LEANDEEEEEEER~! HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! ...Yeeeeah, this is the one I'm gonna romance first lol. Kuras is gonna have to chill for a second.

Anyways, we're here with Leander, and what happens here is...he is so obviously a playboy, but the man is smooth as shit. I mean, damn, the man gave us flowers as soon as he laid eyes on us and was talking about some "New here? I'm certain I would've remembered a face as lovely as yours". A classic playboy line, a fuckboy move, possibly, and I always manage to gravitate towards/pick them in these damn multi-LIs stories. Back on topic though, we ask Leander about the Senobium, and, much like with Kuras, he tells us that it's not only a taboo topic, but that the place is bad news.

That being said though, he's pretty confident that he's able to find an alternative to our ailment, but that we'd have to be willing to trust him a bit, which is a tall order considering the backstory we may have chosen. We bite the bullet though, because we discovered earlier that he was a pretty damn good mage, and we're really desperate. We give into his confidence...and it actually panned out well. So well, in fact, this man, once again, takes the opportunity to spit game and puts the gold in our hands next to the gold on his coat and be like "Look, we match". That man is smoother than damned butter, and I'm down bad.

Anyways, he gets us a room to sleep in for the night, and tells us to go explore, but be careful. So we do, and we run into this guy.

Yeah, so, remember that room that Leander got for us? This guy, monster, thing just swiped the key. Lol here we go...

The thing is, we could easily get it back, but something feels...off...about him. So, we play along with his game for a bit before we're just like "A'ight, can I just get my damn key?" but he kind've avoids the topic and, of course, our desire to reach the Senobium comes up. As expected at this point, he's flatly like "It's overrated" and to simply forget about it. Well, damn...

The encounter goes for a bit more before Vere -- we finally got his name after someone called him out for causing trouble -- leaves with the someone who called after him. Despite all that we've heard about the Senobium, we can't help but see it up close and in person to at least make the journey and trials and suffering worth it.

And we do, we make it there, and we see this figure there.

But when someone calls after us for gawking at the building, the figure disappears as quickly as we saw it. Aside from this though, a feeling of hopeless kind've takes hold and we're just...it's just like damn at this point, ya know? But then something kind've weird happens.

This red-eyed woman, who is clearly supposed to be dead as apparent from this gaping hole that she showed us on her body -- no, you don't get it. It was a literal hole that you could see through -- spoke of this seaspring that could cure, quite literally, anything. Not having much faith in the Senobium anymore, but still desperate for a cure, we follow the woman and receive directions to this mysterious seaspring and are told about some gang leader named Ais.

We get there, and we come to the conclusion that someone probably lives here. We call out, there's no answer...you already know where this is going.

BUT I DID NOT EXPECT THIS MAN TO BE THIS DAMN FINE. AWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! Okay, okay, okay, okay, so I'm going to romance Leander first, DEFINITELY this daddy second, and Kuras is gonna be my solid third. Okay, moving on...

He -- this is Ais, by the way -- pops up and scares the shit out of us. Actually, it wasn't him that scared us, it's his loyal pack of red-eyed soulless that scares the shit out of us, and for obvious reasons. Anyways, for the sake of trying to keep this from being longer than it already is, he's actually a pretty chill dude. Once again, he is also anti-Senobium, but he is straightforward in that, "Yes, that seaspring will literally clear up whatever you've got going on, but boy, is it going to drive you batshit crazy". Well, not batshit, but it makes you a part of this thing called a "groupmind"; that explained the red-eyes. Ais described it as "one big happy family in your head". Oh...okay, so...not a good idea. Guess we weren't as desperate as we thought. He gets one of his trained soulless to take us back towards the city.

After everything that had went down today, we decided that we should officially call it a night. On our way to the room Leander funded for us, we run into some...complications.

Ah, yes. Why would we have been able to just walk across the city and to our room? That would've been too easy. Any chance that this one is tamed, too, and Ais is just messing with us again?

Oh...oh wait...this one doesn't have the red eyes. ...Yeah, we bolt. What makes this whole situation worse though? As fast as we are running, this soulless is keeping up pretty damn easily. Also, did I say that this was the worst of it? It's not, it gets so much worse actually. Tell me why, in our panic, we literally ran ourselves into a dead end. Beautiful. What are the odds we'll survive this thing a second time around?

Pretty damn high apparently. Bless this person because we were about to get one-hit'ed!

They help us up and...wait...didn't we...?

Oh yeeeeeeah! This was the person from the Senobium! ...Damn, they're short lmao. That being said, we were all:

"Yo, you were at the Senobium!"

And they were all:

"So what if I was?"

Mmm...a feisty lil stallion. Big sass. I would be, too, if I was that short. Like, damn, they are not as tall as the baes. Kuras could take their ass out with one stomp if he really wanted to.

Anyways, they scold us about being alone at night and how it's not safe and all that. We follow them for a bit, and granted, we saw that they meant business, but it's still weird that if it's so dangerous, why were they travelling alone and why did they stop to help us?

"There was a bounty on that Soulless; you were just in the way. Not killing you isn't the same as helping you." Wha--?

Well, fuck you, too then! You get romanced last, Shorty McDouche.

We essentially get spicy back, and now, they're all blushy and shit as they start walking us back to our room. Yeah, take that shit, Mhin -- their name is Mhin, by the by -- but we don't have to deal with their sass for much longer because guess who comes along?!

IT'S BAAAAAAAE!!!! .....gyatt DAYUM Mhin is short. Then again, they could be taller than or the same height as us, but we did mention that everyone was significantly taller while Mhin was "Huh...they're shorter than I thought".

Anyways, they both escort us back to the Wet Wick, and wouldn't you know it?

Not only are all the baes here, but they all apparently know each other! All those different personalities hanging out together? Well, isn't that a wild concept. Even still, since they're all here...

Maybe we can get to know one of them a little better...

END OF DEMO LOL. Well...actually there's more after this, but of course, it depends on who you go to talk to. This is definitely long enough, though, lol; you'll have to play the game yourself to find out more, not to mention all the details I left out.

Whoo, FINALLY. The summary was long, but that was because the demo was long, and it had a lot going on. I swear I excluded so much detail, you have no idea, but guys...

When I tell you that this game was so good.

When I tell you that this game was so good.

FRIENDS. When I tell you. That this game. Was so. Good.

I don't think I can emphasize that enough, and I'm not even going to lie to you, at first, I was not feeling it. It's crazy to say that now, but I swear, I was not feeling this game at first, because it was feeling real Dungeons and Dragons, and as much I want to get into that...I can't. It just never vibes with me, and it's like I can't ever effectively get into it. That being said, it was rough at first, but then--!!

Listen. The story started storying, and the baes were baeing, and I was like, there is a visual novel to be played here. I knew it was a demo when I had started it, but when I tell you that I was legitimately upset when that "Thanks for playing!" message came up? DISTRAUGHT.

Anyways, my take on the game (as if it wasn't clear enough): it was great. Fantastic, even. It's just really odd how it flows like a fantasy story book but a DnD map at the same time, and yet they made it work so beautifully. The art style; those of you that have been rocking with me know how I feel about art style. Absolutely enthralled with the art. It looks straight out of one of those DnD campaign or character books. The baes! Don't get me wrong, all of them aren't my cup of tea, but the baes that I'm feening for?! Even the ones that I'm not feening for, honestly. They are sooooo handsome. Like, I want them al-- well, I want like 3 of them, to be best friends with 1 of them, and to throw hands with the other one lol. I mean, like, they're a'ight; I'm gonna have to get to know them because they a lil' too slick at the mouth lmao, but we all know that's probably going to be the sweetest of the bunch.

But yeah, this game is legit. Again, absolutely going to spend money on this one, if that's what the full version will entail. Now, just to add a bit of degeneracy...

IF THE DEVS MAKE THIS INTO AN 18+ GAME WITH A SPICY SCENE. MY SOUL. WILL BE THEIRS.

Okay, okay, okay, anyways, but like, the game really does have mad potential. Like, look at this:

You can pick your back story, and look at what it looks like when you pick your LI!

There are routes! You pick your LI by route! Can you imagine how huge this game is going to be if there are routes for each character and choices within those routes? I am literally so excited! Run me the full release, dev(s)!

Anywho, this post is waaaaaay long, and I could ramble way more about this game, but I shall not. If you'd like to give this game a playthrough yourself -- and I'm telling you that you need to -- I'll put a link to it right here for ya. If you'd also like, you can give the dev(s) that ever desperate "Please. I need more. This game is so good. I will literally sell you my lung and both of my kneecaps. I beg" and let them know what it is! Donations are also super helpful should you be in a position and mindset to do so!

All righty, that's finally all from me! Sorry about the length on this one, but there was so much that needed to be said, and I could honestly say more. For the sake of length though, I'll leave you with this:

Play this game, but also, please remember to drink water, don't be dumb, and hope to see you around~!

TOUCHSTARVED (Demo)

[imaginespazzi]

Yeah no that definitely makes sense and agreed - I think at that stage in her life and career, she'd only have a child out of circumstance rather than on purpose.

P would be trying real hard not to let her favouritism show while she's coaching, but everyone knows anyway that she's extra soft for Stephie. Imagine a game where Stephie gets a little hurt and P's ready to fight another 6-yr old kid lmao.

I keep imagining how soft and cute P would be with a mini Azzi 🥹

Ooo yep, I definitely vibe with staying as close to irl UConn lore as possible, plus I'm never gonna say no to another cruise scene haha.

Oh imagine when P comes around to Storrs during Azzi's final year to visit the menaces or even just when she's facetiming any of them and that inevitable awkwardness of broaching the Azzi topic, or Azzi accidentally walking in while the others are on the phone with her.

I realise I've just kinda assumed that they break up after P's final year 😅 Would that mean that the public never knew about their relationship? At least, not officially?

If that's the case, do the media or public ever question their "friendship" and why they don't seem to be close anymore?? Like when P gets traded, and there's talk about the two "former best friends" being reunited?

Also, do they still kinda fall into each other at times after breaking up? Maybe especially that first year or so after the break up, like during Azzi's final college year and then slowly fade into no communication? Or do they immediately cut off all connection and only interact at public events and games? Or just barely interact at all?

Oh and I know I've been advocating for Tim to still always be checking in on P, even if it's just at games but I am super curious in general about the dynamics between Azzi and P's family and P and Azzi's family after they break up. Especially Azzi and Drew, cause you know I'm a sucker for a Drew cameo and Azzi + Drew interactions!

A Steph appearance! Just don't make Stephie into a Warriors fan 😫😂

Ooo a possible divorce situation with P??? Ugh I'm so curious about other relationships they had after breaking up! Although idk about P getting married to someone else (only cause I'm selfish and just can't see her marrying anyone other than Azzi lol) - what if she got engaged and came close but in the end, she just couldn't go through with it?? Or we can go with divorce, that's cool too, it has been 9 years after all haha.

I mean… I may or may not have a playlist where I drag songs into if they give me the exes to lovers fic vibe 😏. I need a title for it though!

Ngl, I actually was thinking "oh I wonder what Taylor song Nivi's gonna go with for this one?" 😆 Last Kiss seems like a pretty perfect choice. But now that just makes me think that we're about to go through even more pain than we did with the UCLA fic before we get a happy ending. We are gonna get a happy ending, right?

Speaking of Taylor songs - why do I feel like loml could potentially be one of the songs used for a chapter - "what we thought was for all time was momentary" or "you shit-talked me under the table, talking rings and talking cradles. I wish I could un-recall how we almost had it all."

Oh btw Nivi, you totally don't have to address all or any of my questions!! I literally just chuck in whatever comes to mind but please feel free to tell me to just wait for the fic to find out the answers 😅

And pleaseee, your "NO NO NO NOPE NO" in response to that ask about you having kids had me dead 😭

ALSO, Tatum and Ella Mai expecting a baby?! Talk about private but not a secret, they did a fine ass job keeping the pregnancy quiet as long as they did though!

-🙋‍♀️

EVERYONE HAS ME SO CONFLICTED I have no idea what to do lmao maybe I'll just leave it open-ended and we don't have to go into how this child came to be lol

LMAO all the other parents whining about playing time and their child not getting a starting role meanwhile Azzi's out here giving Paige a talking to about how they're literally 5 year old's, this is not that serious and Stephie doesn't needa start every single game

I actually haven't decided the exact time for when they break up but it's definitely before Azzi gets to the W I think but I haven't really thought about the media reaction yet, other than that it's obviously a big deal when they end up on the same team again in the sense that it's a huge deal that two mvp's are teaming up

So....mayhaps a little spoiler but there might potentially be just a little bit of Drew and Azzi angst at some point because let's just remember she was in his life from very young and then she wasn't.

Well if I go with the Valkyries, it only make sense babes. Trust it's gonna be as hard to write for me as it is for you to read but Stephie is very likely gonna be a Warriors fans (that hurt to write oh lord)

LMAO give me a title?

Happy ending? Hmmmm what's that?

YES LOML WOULD HIT SO GOOD. Maybe I'll use that in chapter but I gotta add it to my playlist asap for sure.

I literally got that ask and was like, y'all I am literally in college, no I do not have a child thanks!

I SAW THAT. I'M SO EXICTED FOR THEM!! They really did such a good job and aww Deuce is gonna get a little sibling.

[zevrans]

💀

[todayisafridaynight]

not to make people believe in me and my work ethic but im lowkey a liiiitttttleeee stoked to share the fics ive been cookin lately..

[steviescrystals]

i am experiencing emotions rn and idk what they are :)

[mypralaya]

dagnabit loads of disjointed thought snippets about Haven and the Adversary but no ability to make them cohesive + leaving soon anyway

[tarotmantic]

joe trohman might not have liked mania but i did 😁

[stupidnaturals]

.

[toastsnaffler]

actually ive been thinking abt this a lot lately like basically for years i assumed i was very (cis)het passing and only recently ive become aware that i am in fact. very obviously perhaps almost comically gay to other queer ppl. like lmaoooo ok then

[githvyrik]

I just wanna make something that’s interesting to somebody for once :(

[sttoru]

𝐆𝐎𝐎𝐃 𝐎𝐋𝐃-𝐅𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐃 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐁𝐎𝐘 !

⟣ sypnosis. you were curious if your boyfriend would pass a ‘loyalty test’ that you’ve seen on social media and you decide to see for yourself, only to discover something much more . . . heartwarming.

⟣ tags. gojo satoru x female reader. mostly tooth rotting fluff. talks about cheating / a sprinkle of trust issues from reader. the rest is satoru just being lovesick.

⟣ note. uhhhh… idk just a random idea i got at three am on a saturday night after being woken up from a nightmare >_< enjoy .

you don’t think satoru would actually ever cheat on you. your curiosity just got the best of you when you saw that one girl do a ‘loyalty test’ on her boyfriend. it was quite simple—testing if your partner would hand you their phone without being suspiciously defensive.

therefore you walked into satoru’s room and spotted him laying on his side, his back facing the door. he didn’t have any earphones in so you could hear the sounds of a movie playing on the phone he held in his hands.

he seemed so peaceful and content that you were already feeling bad for disturbing him with your silly test. you moved to sit on the edge of the bed and cleared your throat, making your presence known as if the sorcerer hadn’t sensed it moments ago.

“are you cheating on me?”

blunt and straight to the point.

satoru pauses the show on his phone and looks at you like you had said the most outrageous thing there is (to him, you really did). he drops the device on the bed and turns his body to face yours; “well—hello to you too, baby.”

he runs a hand through his hair before sitting up against the headboard with a raised brow, one hand cautiously reaching out for you. satoru was thinking about all the things he has said or done previously that could’ve possibly make you think he was screwing around behind your back. his mind worked fast, though he couldn’t come up with any logical explanation.

“answer my question please, ‘toru.” you mumble, feeling slightly guilty for doing this to your lover. you could see the confusion plastered on his face.

“no, i am not.” satoru shakes his head whilst holding your hand in his, thumb brushing against the back of it, “what makes you think that?”

you weren’t about to say ‘oh nevermind then! just a dumb thing that i saw on tiktok’—no, there was still one thing left to do. even if you’re so super sure that your boyfriend was hiding nothing from you. maybe there was an one in a million chance that your intuition was wrong. or maybe it’s just your underlying trust issues speaking.

“uhh, just wanted.. to check.. i guess?” you clear your throat and take a deep inhale before putting your hand out to satoru, palm up.

the white-haired sorcerer looks from your hand to you, and back. he doesn’t know what that indicated, so he takes a simple guess; satoru places his chin on your palm, giving you an amused kind of grin. you raise an eyebrow as he rests his head on your hand—which wasn’t what you wanted to gain from your gesture.

but you couldn’t blame him. it was cute that that was the first thing he thought of doing.

“you’re always welcome to check. got nothin’ to hide anyway.” he shrugs, not offended by your accusation in the slightest. you see the way his blue eyes look up at you—in a way that shows his pure, unadulterated adoration for you.

you nod and scratch satoru under his chin, to which he smiles and closes his eyes, enjoying the tingling touch, “then can i .. look through your phone?”

without an ounce of hesitation, he had placed his phone unlocked in your hand. satoru doesn’t care much about privacy anyway—you’re his girlfriend, you’re the only one allowed to know every single thing about him, “of course, baby.”

your eyes land on the screen and your jaw drops as you see his home screen; a picture of you up close, sleeping with your cheek squished against his arm, own hands resting near your head and . . . is that drool trickling down your chin?

“oops, sorry, you were too cute not to take a picture of.” satoru chuckles as he sees your reaction. he lays back on his side, elbow propped on the pillow with his head resting against his hand—watching you go through his phone with a relaxed look.

you roll your eyes playfully before starting your search. your finger swiped across the screen and landed on the messenger app satoru uses. you click on it and scroll through his chats, but don’t find anything out of the ordinary. he recently talked to you, his first year students, nanami and shoko.

you curiously tap on his chat with shoko and don’t read anything interesting at first glance. you scroll up and take note of how satoru was the one who kept most of the conversation going. shoko’s replies were much shorter and curt—straight to the point.

but then your eyes land on a conversation from two weeks ago. satoru had showed shoko a bunch of selfies you had sent him that same day. he was telling her how ‘cute’ and ‘pretty’ you were, practically bragging about you being his girl.

you scroll up some more and see that he’s done the same many times before; sending shoko pictures of you and kind of rambling to her about how beautiful you are.

shoko—being the good friend she is—indulged into his little lovesick ramblings and agreed with every thing satoru said—even complimenting your looks herself. you begun to get embarrassed at this unexpected revelation.

when going through more of his chats with other people, you realise how much satoru loves to talk about you. you couldn’t possibly count the many times satoru had refused invitations from his students or other friends simply because he wanted to hang out with you instead.

you discovered that he even skipped two or three important meetings at the school to go spend the day with you—nanami scolding him via text each time he did so.

“damn..” you murmur and glance up at your lover after closing his messaging app. satoru was staring right back at you with the biggest grin you’ve ever seen on him.

he wasn’t embarrassed about you reading some of those cheesy and sappy texts at all. in fact, he was happy. he wants you to know how much he loves you (as if he doesn’t show you exactly that every day of the week).

“go on, sweets.” satoru nods towards his phone, encouraging you to continue your inspection. your eyes dart back towards the screen and you shyly swipe and scroll some more, eventually ending up in his gallery.

the first things you noticed: two albums dedicated to you. all were filled with hundreds of pictures of you (and him). one was named ‘my love,’ the other ‘me&my love’ — both with a heart at the end. scrolling through them, you noticed many images you hadn’t even realised were ever taken.

many of those pictures were also favourited in his gallery.

you nibble on your bottom lip and leave the gallery app even more flustered than before. you aimlessly click around some more on his phone. what really surprised you most was that you were named in his reminder app.

there were tons—all added in one long list. some were so pure that you couldn’t contain the slight tears in your eyes;

‘bring gf gifts’, ‘remind gf that she’s amazing’, ‘bring gf lunch’, ‘send gf daily selfie’, ‘daily cuddles w gf (if she wants)’, ‘give gf big smooch (important!)’, ‘check up on gf when away on business’, — satoru doesn’t actually need to have those reminders on his phone. his mind is so full of you that he’ll automatically remember to do everything, almost on autopilot. he just has those there for… well, just in case he somehow ends up forgetting.

you lock his phone after seeing enough and give it back to your lover. you wordlessly crawl over to him on the bed and snuggle up to his body, head resting on his chest.

“sorry.” you quietly apologise. you knew he wasn’t hiding anything, but the fact that you still went ahead and tried out that ‘loyalty test’ on someone as loyal and loving as satoru makes your heart ache a bit. especially after discovering just how smitten he’s with you.

“dunno why you’re apologising—but please don’t.” satoru whispers and rubs your back in a soothing manner, kissing the top of your head and smiling against your scalp afterwards, “it’s fiiine.”

he’s entertained by the reactions to your discoveries, even if those are but mere indications to the actual unending and undying love he holds for you in his heart.

you lift your head up and look at satoru. your bottom lip stuck out, corners of your mouth twitching slightly whilst your eyes started to get a bit glassy. you really felt bad—yet you also felt appreciated on the other hand. if you didn’t go through with your curious idea, you wouldn’t have gotten to know about any of this.

“aww, my sweet, sweet girl.” satoru coos and places two kisses right below each eye, tapping your nose with a grin. he adores the way you look and if it wasn’t for his self control, he’d have nibbled on those cheeks of yours out of playful aggression.

it’s then that satoru remembers one of his daily tasks; one he hadn’t properly done today.

you were caught off guard once more as satoru’s lips crashed down onto yours—no warning given whatsoever. his big hands held onto your cheeks, thumb rubbing the skin there whilst his glossy lips moved against yours in a gentle yet much sloppy way.

“there,” the white-haired man hums in content as he pulls away, giggling once he sees a bit of his saliva coat your mouth. he wipes it away with his thumb, “your smooch of the day.”

you couldn’t help but laugh at the exaggerated cringy way satoru said the latter—your boyfriend laughing right alongside you afterwards.

satoru wasn’t done with you, however. he had many other daily tasks that were yet to be fulfilled.

[astrxealis]

arctic monkeys in the philippines raghh raghhhhhh raghhhhhhhhhh

[deadsetobsessions]

What Do You Have There?

A knife!

Danny plunked the butter knife in its pedestal of importance. The nice thing about having a billionaire vigilante for a... foster is the amount of money Danny was allowed to drop on his hobbies. For example, his extensive collection of souvenirs.

They're not just any old regular souvenirs. No, no, no. That would be so boring! No, these souvenirs, he obtained from the various muggings, knife fights, and various other situations he's been in ever since he was dropped ungraciously into Gotham.

The butter knife? Damian. Precocious, stabby Damian who he had startled into the stab instinct. A point of pride, really. Danny knew Damian was good at fighting! It was practically, in ghost terms, a super enthusiastic hello! Yes, the butter knife would be kept in the well lit part of the wall. Alfred had told him to stay home today to recuperate. He didn't need it, since the wound would heal in an hour or two, but he'd take staying at home any day.

A couple of hours later, well into the afternoon and right before what Danny knew to be their patrol hours, Danny had a visitor.

"Danny."

"Oh, hey, Damian! What's up?" Danny turned around to see Damian hovering awkwardly near the door.

"I am here to... check upon your wound. It is imperative that it gets proper treatment."

Ancients, Damian was exactly like those alley kids. He just ate a thesaurus instead of the drawling accent the alley kids picked up. Which meant Damian endeared himself to Danny pretty quickly. Like a little ghostling.

"Oh, I'm good. See? No blood is leaking out of the wound." Danny held up spotless bandages.

Danny watched Damian step into his haunt- his room- with a pleased hum. Damian inspected the bandages and stepped back with a sharp nod of approval. His eyes flicked to the wall that Danny was rearranging (again) and did a double take at the butter knife in the middle.

"Is that the butter knife I stabbed you with?"

"Why, yes, it is!" Danny beamed.

"Why on earth would you display that?"

"Because you stabbed me with it?"

"That makes absolutely no sense, you simpleton! When someone stabs you, stab them back!"

"That would be mean!"

Damian spluttered. Danny tugged the kid closer to the wall, cheering inwardly as Damian didn't shove him away. It might be because he was exaggeratedly wincing as he moved his "injured arm" but Danny has learned to take a win where he could find them, especially with ghosts. Not that Damian was a ghost, but he sure acted like one.

"Do you want to see my collection?"

"Your collection?"

"Yeah!" Without giving him time to answer, Danny barreled ahead. "So this is the knife you stabbed me with. Which, by the way, was an awesome show of strength and accuracy."

Damian grimaced. Danny continued blithely, secretly memorizing Damian's reactions to laugh at later.

"And this is the knife those guys stabbed me with that one time Cass found me. And this one is a bullet someone shot at me down by the docks. I think I interrupted some kind of meeting?"

Damian's jaw had a slight tick to it that would have been a baffled frown on anyone else.

"And when was this?"

"Oh, like a week ago."

"What? When did you go to the docks?!"

"At night. I couldn't sleep."

"And you went to the docks?! How did you even get there?!"

"Walked," Danny lied, like a lying liar. He floated, obviously, but none of them knew that. "Anyways, this is a law book! Someone threw it at my head!"

"Hey, guys! What're you doing?"

Danny and Damian turned around.

"Richard? Brown? What are you doing here?"

"Oh, Bruce wanted me to come back for the weekend," Dick said. Danny knew it was code for "something's going down and we need back up." Man, he still couldn't believe they didn't know he knew they were crime fighting vigilantes.

"Same!" Stephanie said. Danny was glad to see that her wounds from "cartwheeling in the manor" were healed.

"I see. Danny was showing me his collection of... objects people have used as weapons against him."

"What?!"

"Yeah!" Danny beamed, completely innocent. "Come on! I'll show you!"

With that, Danny continued to ramble. He just knew that the way Dick's and Stephanie's smiles strained would give him a good laugh for weeks to come. "And this is the glass bottle a drunk tried to shank me with in Crime Alley, and this is a knife the Red Hood himself threw at me."

Dick interrupted, face stiff. "Hood threw a knife at you?!"

"Yeah, but that was because my kids broke into his safe house and I was trying to get them to stop looting the place. And he didn't know I was a kid too, so he aimed a gun at my head. He shot at me too, but I couldn't go back to get the bullet, or else it would have joined my collection." Danny grabbed a box and shook it, metal rattling inside.

Dick smiled sweetly, Stephanie and Damian inching away from it.

"Oh, wow, I see!"

----

In his apartment, Jason shuddered. He grabbed his guns.

"Something's wrong. I just know it," he muttered to himself.

----

Danny smiled innocently as he described the horrific, near death events he got his souvenirs from.

"This is my bullet box! Man, Gotham has a lot of gun fights. I got shot so many times!" Danny complained, shaking the box like a rattling toy.

"Did you know Danny snuck out to go to the bay?" Damian snitched immediately, like a snitch.

"The Bay?! Danny! You know that's where people dump bodies, right?!" Stephanie poked him in the arm.

"Yeah, but like... I wouldn't die. And besides! I missed my friends!"

"You mean the minions you made in Crime Alley?" Steph asked. Danny pouted, eyeing the way Dick's gaze roved over his souvenirs and paling the more he realized how often Danny "got hurt."

Damian bumped a shoulder against Dick's arm. Danny returned to the conversation.

"If anything, I'm their minion." He said, remembering the times the Alley kids sent him on food runs.

"Fear Danny, the overlord of street rats."

Danny snorted. And- "Oh! Yeah, there was like a weird owl looking guy? And then they stabbed me with a finger and I kept it because woah, cool talon looking thing, right? And then they threw a bunch of those tiny knives at me? And then they just kind of vanished? Gotham is so weird."

And now, with all of them pale and stressed out of their minds, Danny swung a devastating blow called guilt trip.

"And that's the batarangs!" Three heads swung over to the line of batarangs. "Those vigilantes kept throwing them at me! One of them even hit me in the arm. Those things are sharp, man."

"Uh. Which ones?" Stephanie asked.

"Hm?" Danny hummed obliviously.

"Do you know which vigilantes?"

"Oh, it was like... the purple one. And the sword one? And like the one with the yellow insignia in the middle. And... all of them, I think? Except for signal. That guy's cool."

Stephanie and Damian had matching veiled looks of guilt. Dick shot them a sharp look. Danny decided to deal the last bit of damage to Dick.

"I'm glad you guys are way less stabby than the general Gotham public though, butter knife incident aside. At least I don't have to worry about you guys getting into danger, right? If you guys got hurt like my family did... I don't know..."

Danny smiled-squinted at them, channeling Cujo at his cutest and saddest: when he doesn't get to eat off of Danny's plate. So, pretty sad and pathetic.

"Uh, yeah." Dick said, guilt splayed all over his face. "Alfred said dinner was almost ready."

"Yes," Damian cleared his throat, looking away. "We shall partake in Pennyworth's hard work."

"Ahaha!" Stephanie laughed, nervously. "Welp, let's go bother Tim!"

Falling into step behind them, Danny grinned.

[transgaysex]

slowly realizing that i might have to be the second to last kid to leave this fucking household

[kana-de]

Can I request Scaramouche giving his AFAB partner head for the first time. But reader has always been insecure about the idea of it after a bad experience with an ex... 👉🏻👈🏻

Any AU is fine! This is super self indulgent so if do you this I appreciate you

- Someone from the Shrine discord 🫶🏻🫶🏻

★ summary: scaramouche x fem!reader. him giving you head for the first time and providing you with all the reassurance.

☆ cw: nsfw. oral (f receiving). use of 'good girl'. scara being nice. idk what to add more, the req says it all. i also hope i portrayed the idea of your req well🙌🏻. 1.144 words.

"do you still-"

"yes." scaramouche interrupts you, looking up at your blushing and hesitant face. you look at his head in between your thighs. gosh, he really does look like he literally belongs there, you think, gulping when you do.

but, nevertheless, all kinds of thoughts start forming in your head. what if he won't like it? what if you look bad down there? what if it-

"scara, are you really sure-"

"i am, [name]. i know that tone, stop overthinking." scaramouche sighs when he realizes what exactly you're thinking about. "you look gorgeous. stunning. jaw-dropping. breathtaking. do you see what i'm trying to get at?" he smiles at you, seeing how his words make you blush. he'll repeat that over and over for you if that means seeing you like this again - hand hovering over your cheeks and looking away.

"stop thinking about everything bad. i assure you it'll be fine." he says, and you give him a look while biting your lower lip. you catch yourself that you're thinking again, and you exhale deeply. "and i surely won't be disgusted. if i offered you this - it already means i'm not in any way disgusted."

"do you trust me?" he asks softly, his thumb tracing soothing circles on the milky skin of your hips, occasionally finding its way under the waistband of your lacy panties. god, he can't help but get hard while looking at them - he'd eat you out anyway, but with these undergarments he just needs to do it. and he surely needs to ask you to wear them more often...

"i.. do." you stammer quietly, and from his position below he sees just how your chest rises and falls, even hears your heartbeat thumping loudly in your rib cage. "i do." you repeat, this time sounding like you mean it - and you do.

"good." scaramouche whispers and lets his face get closer to your - yet - closed core. his eyes roam around your curves, and his hands spread your thighs a bit more. he looks at the lacy panties again, and his eyes' pupils basically dilate in hearts.

"mmm, wearing these just for me? i'm honored." he chuckles, and licks his lips. your heart nearly jumps out of your chest at this small gesture, and you feel yourself getting wetter by each passing second. "so sad i'll have to take them off tonight."

you missed the moment when he already discarded your underwear, making a lick along your folds, and you swear the sensation basically has you almost moaning out loud, before you bite your lip and breathe out slowly.

scaramouche, upon sensing your reactions, reluctantly, but withdraws his mouth from your cunt, smirking and taking your hand, guiding it to hold his indigo locks. you look down at him in confusion.

"i know how not vocal you are," he starts, eyes gazing up at you, full of understanding and love. "so just pull my hair whenever it feels too good, mhm?"

your eyes slightly widen at his idea. this is brilliant for you.

your fingers tangle in his hair, running through it for a few seconds before nodding slightly and giving him a small smile, still feeling your cheeks burning from all the embarrassed - it's basically written on your face how shy you feel. but you can't deny you want this.

"alright then... let me get back to my dish."

"scar- ah!.."

you moan and your fingers instinctively tug on his hair, and scaramouche nearly smirks at how easily it is to get you so turned on. he starts licking along your pussy, starting from your hole and up to your clit, then giving it a light kiss before his lips seal around it and his tongue makes swirling motions. he can't deny that you taste so good he wants to be in-between your legs 24/7. he'd never refuse such an offer - how could he?

it's not long before you whine something incoherent about how good it feels, and he just can't not notice that little babbling of yours.

"feeling good, aren't you?" he mumbles, lips grazing the sensitive flesh, almost soaked in your slick. his voice vibrates onto your cunt, sending small, vibrating sensations as you push his face more and more into your pussy, thighs instinctively closing around his head as he continues his ministrations.

"ah-ah-ah, no, keep them open..." scara says, hands coming to grab your thighs one more time and spread them. "be a good girl for me and keep your legs spread."

you whimper, head throwing back as a breathy moan leaves your throat as his tongue starts moving already inside your hole. you can't even begin to describe how good it feels, you couldn't even if you wanted to - it feels so great your thoughts can't properly form in your mind.

you, tugging on his hair again and again, and a few more times through another few minutes is enough for scaramouche to understand that he's doing everything in the most perfect way possible. the way you moan, arch your back and let your fingers pull on his locks every ten or so seconds is dazing for him that he just can't help but let his lips seal around your swollen clit once more to make you let out another high-pitched whine.

"you taste so good..." he mutters just barely moving his mouth away from your cunt, sending another vave of small vibrations straight to your core.

"s-scara- o-oh, god.. i'm-" you can't even form a proper sentence, only pushing his face more and more into your cunt, on the verge of tearing down from how good he makes you feel. "a-almost- there... please, scara, g'nna-"

scaramouche, realizing what you're getting to when you start bucking you hips into his mouth a little too much, hums a long "mmhm" into your pussy, making vibrating sensations pulse within you once more, and that is when you fall apart, your orgasm crashing down onto you.

scara helps you to go through the aftermath of it, bot moving his lips and tongue away for a moment as he continues to - now more slowly, to not overstimulate you - suck and lap on your swelled clit as he holds your hips so you won't back away. he finally pulls back after you start to slowly pant, and licks his lips, admiring once again how good you taste in his mind.

"t-this was... so good..." you manage to mumble after taking a few more deep breaths, calming yourself down after such intense release. you try to close your thighs together again, thinking that you're both done.

scaramouche chuckles and doesn't let you do so, holding the skin of your thighs and spreading them wide open again. he notices you looking down at him in confusion and raises an eyebrow. "what? you thought we were done?"