#anyway sorry I didn’t realize I felt so strongly about this

[big-barn-bed]

Linda/John?! How have I never thought of this….😧

mmmmm yeah much to consider…

just… the way she thought john would be her favorite before she met them and then was just like..actually nevermind. i’ll take bambi over there instead 😋✌️

and you can’t tell me john didn’t want her at least in a twisted ‘she’s paul’s but I bet I could snatch her’ kind of way. not to mention that physically she was definitely his type. blonde, big tits, distinct facial features..dude was lying when he said she wasn’t that pretty. or maybe he just meant it surprised him that paul picked her because she was HIS type, not paul’s.

[bloatedandalone04]

To The One I Love - 4

Series Masterlist

➪in which your parents come to see you, and you quickly realize how many moments you’ve forgotten in not only your life, but theirs as well.

PSA: strongly suggested to read the warnings before proceeding.

WC; 4.3k | Do not repost this anywhere, reblogs are fine ♡

You slept for longer this time, Tyler knew that because he fell asleep after you and woke up before you did. 

It was now day three, and your parents had finally been able to sort out a way to get here. They would be driving instead of flying, so it would take them a bit longer, but at least they were on their way. 

He plugged his phone in and was just about to close his eyes again, but a soft knock sounded on the door, followed by Dr. James poking his head in. “Bad time?”

Tyler glanced over at you before shaking his head. “No, she’s just sleepin’. We talked a lot yesterday, I think it may have worn her out,”

“That’s alright,” James nodded, “It’s good that she’s responsive and awake. It’d be a different story if she were still asleep and hadn’t woken up yet.”

Tyler didn’t even think about that. You hit your head pretty hard, what if you had never woken up? He didn’t even want to picture that reality, especially since he was still trying to get used to his current one. 

“Anyway,” the doctor continued once he realized that Tyler hadn’t said anything back. “I’ll have to wake her up so I can check her stitches and replace the bandage.”

Tyler nodded, reaching over to grab and squeeze your hand, taking it upon himself to wake you up. A quiet call of your name and another squeeze of your hand did the trick, and soon enough your eyes opened. 

Dr. James quickly rounded the side of your bed, a new, clean bandage in his gloved hand. “Hi, Y/n,” he greeted with a smile, and you smiled back before looking over at Tyler. “I’m just here to change your bandage and check on your stitches, is that alright?”

You nodded slowly, still waking up as you shifted higher against the pillow. “Will it hurt?”

Tyler felt a small smile form on his face at your question, and he moved the chair closer to your bed as he laced his fingers with yours. “It shouldn’t. I’ll remove it slowly in case the stitches are stuck to the bandage,”

You bit your lip and nodded again, more hesitant this time. “It’ll be fine,” Tyler assured you, and you glanced over at him again with a nervous look on your face. “You’ll be fine, baby.” 

James slowly loosened the bandage around your head and pulled it away, and the edge of the stitches were a bit stuck to it. Your hand squeezed Tyler’s at the faint tug, but then the used fabric was successfully removed and set aside. 

This was the first time Tyler has seen your head injury since the day you got it, and it already looked a lot better. Granted, he saw it a mere few minutes after it happened, and he couldn’t see much since you were bleeding profusely, so really, what did he know?

He hadn’t realized how big it was, with one end starting in the middle of your forehead and the other going past your temple and nearly halfway on the side of your head. Your skin was bright red and irritated, and there were a few spots of blood here and there, but the stitches were looking good. 

Tyler let you hold his hand with a death grip as Dr. James gently cleaned up the skin around your stitches, then he rubbed some clear stuff over them before reapplying a new bandage. “There we go,” he commented, stepping away from you as he discarded his gloves. “That’s better. It should be time for your medication soon, too, so I’ll send Nurse Karson in within the next few minutes.”

“Okay,” you whispered. “Thank you.”

“Thanks,” Tyler added as James left the room, then he turned back to you with a grin. “You did so well, babe. Only broke two of my fingers.”

You blushed at his tease, looking down to see just how tightly you were holding his hand. “Sorry,” you mumbled, loosening your grip. “I was nervous.”

“Don’t be sorry,” he murmured, “You can squeeze my hand whenever you want.”

You smiled at him, pressing your lips together. “I’m really glad I have you here with me, Ty…” you trailed off, and Tyler felt his heart swell at the nickname you haven’t given him in three days. Before this, you always called him Ty and rarely called him Tyler, so to hear it now was nearly enough to bring a few tears to his eyes. “I don’t know what I would do if I was here by myself. I don’t want to be alone.”

Tyler shook his head, bringing your hand up to his lips and pressing a kiss to the back of it. “You’ll never be alone, baby,” he promised, “Not as long as I’m alive, you won’t.”

Your expression softened as your fingers gripped his tighter. A faint pink blush coated your face as you gave his hand a soft tug, murmuring, “C’mere…”

He stood, letting your hand pull him closer so his thighs were pressed against the side of the bed. His heartbeat was loud in his ears as you reached for his other hand and pulled him so he was leaning over, and when he was close enough, you released both his hands in order to wrap your arms around his shoulders. 

Tyler felt himself begin to melt against you, but he still made sure he wasn’t putting too much of his weight on your body as he gently hugged you back. He buried his face against the side of your neck, inhaling the sweet scent that only belonged to you. It felt like it had been weeks since he last touched you, not a mere three days, so he wasn’t holding himself back too much. 

“I can’t tell you how much that means to me,” you whispered, gently pressing your face against his shoulder. “God, I’d be lost without you, Tyler. Literally.”

He smiled against your hair before pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “I’d be lost without you,” he murmured, and he meant it with every inch of him. “The fact that you’re willin’ to stay with me even though you don’t remember what we were…Your trust in me is everythin’. You’re everythin’.”

You pull away and Tyler had to force himself to let you go, sitting next to you on the bed instead of going back to that God awful chair. “Tyler…did you and I…did we have a bonfire at some point? I don’t know if it was a dream or real, but I remember a bonfire, and you and I were really drunk and all over each other,” you hesitantly ask, playing with your fingers as you look over at him. 

Tyler’s eyes widened a bit as he thought back to a few summers ago, when he and the gang had one of the biggest chases ever and you suggested he throw a get together the next night to celebrate. 

He spent a good portion of the next morning gathering logs and branches, and he invited over a bunch of people to your house. That was the first summer you spent living in that house, and it was definitely a great way to start off that chapter of your lives. 

You were right, you and Tyler did have too much to drink and were practically the embodiment of the word ‘PDA’ as nothing was off limits. Boone teased Tyler relentlessly the next time they saw each other since Tyler couldn’t keep his hands off you that night and ended up taking you to bed before the party even ended. 

Tyler felt himself sit up straighter, “You remember that night?” He asked for clarification, and you nodded slowly. 

“I think so…we were celebrating something I think,” you trailed off then you sat up straight, too. “Wait, so that happened? That wasn’t a dream?” 

Tyler shook his head, a hopeful look on his face. “No, baby, that wasn’t a dream,” he murmured, taking your hand in his. “That was real. It happened a few years ago.”

You squeezed his hand, your eyes never breaking away from his. “What does this mean?” 

“I don’t know,” he answered honestly, reaching over to softly grip your chin. “But it’s a good thing. It’s a really good thing.”

Your eyes were looking a bit brighter now, and you looked more lively. It was a glimpse of who you were before the latest storm, and Tyler knew he missed that version of you, but he wasn’t aware of just how much. But he loved you before, and he loved you even more now. 

“Ty,” you start, opening your mouth to continue but before you could, the door opened and Nurse Karson walked in with a grin. 

“Sorry for interrupting,” she apologizes, making her way over to the other side of your bed. “I have your medication. How are you feeling today?”

You watched as she set the cup of pills onto the table before your eyes met Tyler’s again. “Better,”

After that, your pain medication kicked in real quick and soon enough you were sleeping again. Tyler had retreated back to the chair and had his legs propped up on your bed as he scrolled through the channels on the TV, the volume muted so he didn’t wake you up. 

But the quiet didn’t last long as the door swung open and hit the wall behind it with a soft thud, and you jolted awake as your parents came stumbling into the room. “Oh, Y/n,” your mother gasped as she ran over to you, her hand reaching out to gently caress your face. 

“We came as soon as we could, honey,” your dad said as he stood behind your mom. “How are you feeling? How’s your head?”

You were clearly still a bit shaken up at the sudden wakeup, but you relaxed once you took your mom’s hand. “I’m okay…my head is okay today,” 

“Thank God,” she let out a deep sigh, looking back up at your dad. “We were a nervous wreck, sweetheart. We couldn’t find someone to watch Louis and your fathers boss was being a real prick about the whole thing and-”

“Who’s Louis?” You asked as you looked between your parents. “Do I have a brother I forgot about?”

Your dad’s eyes widened and a strangled scoff left his lips as he shook his head. “God, no,” he grunted. “Louis is the Aussie mix you got us as a going away gift.”

“I got you a dog?” You gasped, looking over at Tyler. “We got them a dog?”

“It was your idea,” he raised his hands and sat up in the chair. 

“Where’s our dog?” You asked with a pout and Tyler laughed. 

“We don’t have one,” he answered. “Yet.”

You give him a hopeful look before your mom brings your attention back to her. “I guess that means your memory isn’t back yet?”

“No,” you quietly reply, looking down at your hands. “But I remembered something from a few years ago earlier today. It’s a good thing.” You repeated Tyler’s words, and he glanced up and shared a look with your dad.

“How are you doing, Ty?” He asked as he placed his hands on your moms shoulders. “How are you holding up?”

Tyler forced out a smile, feeling his eyes burn at the sudden question being directed at him. He preferred it when the attention was solely on you, so he could suffer in silence. “I’m good,” he lied, a tight grin on his face. 

You looked over at him again and it was like you knew he was faking it, and somehow that comforted him. “Tyler’s been my rock,” you say, reaching over to take his hand in yours. “He’s been here the whole time.”

Your father locked his jaw as if he, too, was holding back his emotions. “I’m glad you have him,”

“We’re so grateful, Tyler,” your mom added, tears fully streaming down her face. “You were there for her when we couldn’t be.”

“Hey,” you sternly said, softly glaring at your parents. “Don’t say that. You couldn’t have known.”

Your mom shook her head, taking the tissue your dad held out to her with a grateful smile. Your parents reminded Tyler of you and him, and they were also high school sweethearts and still going strong. He knew that you and he could do it, too. “I know, but still. I feel terrible that we weren’t here when you needed us,”

“Mom, it’s okay,” you whisper, squeezing her hand. “Really.”

She nods, wiping at her eyes before leaning in and brushing your hair out of your face. “You just focus on getting better, sweetheart,” she murmured, pressing a faint kiss to the bandage on your head. “We’re here now, okay?”

“We’re not going anywhere,” your dad agreed and you gave them both a tired smile. 

You whispered, “Thank you,” before turning to Tyler. “And you.”

“You don’t have to thank me,” he mumbles, “You know I’m here for you. Always.”

Your dad clears his throat, wrapping his arm around your mom’s shoulders. “Get some sleep, honey,” he said, “The doctor said you need your rest to recover.”

You nodded, leaning back on the bed. “Can you find out when I’m allowed to leave? I hate being stuck in this bed. The sheets are scratchy,” 

He laughed, “I’ll see what I can find out,” 

Your mom followed after him then stopped to look at Tyler. “How’s the coffee here? Is it any good?”

Tyler gave her a regretful smile and shook his head, giving her all the information she needed. 

“Damnit,” she muttered, giving you a sheepish smile before scurrying back over to you and kissing your cheek multiple times. 

“God, mom, really?” You whined, gently pushing her away. 

“Don’t ‘mom’ me,” she scoffed, wiping at her eyes again. “You don’t know the hell your father and I went through when we found out what happened.”

Your expression softened as you bit your lip. “Sorry…”

Your mom waved you off, placing a comforting hand on Tyler’s shoulder before making her way to your dad who was still hovering by the door. “Don’t be,” she shook her head. “Are you hungry? Maybe I can find you something nice in the cafeteria.”

Tyler looked down, knowing she most likely wouldn’t be able to find a damn thing that looked nice in that cafeteria, but he didn’t have the heart to tell her that. “We’ll be back, honey. And we’ll try not to scare you this time,” your dad grinned before guiding your mom out of the room so they could start on the tasks you’d given them. 

You stared at the door for a few more seconds before letting out a breath of air. “Holy shit, Ty,” you gasped in disbelief. “My dad has a full on beard now.”

Tyler laughed, realizing that you were probably so used to seeing your dad with a shaved face since he only started growing his beard two years ago. Before that, his face was hairless, and Tyler could see how odd that would be for you. “Yeah, he’s been workin’ on that for a while now,”

“He’s gotten so scruffy,” you laugh quietly, and Tyler could see your eyes start to water. “And my mom’s gotten so skinny…and I don’t remember any of it. They’ve been living their lives the last ten years and I don’t remember it.”

Tyler’s face softened and he knew that you had hidden your true feelings from your parents. “Baby,” he trailed off, not knowing what he could say to make you feel better. There was nothing he could say to make you feel better. “I know things are hard right now, but you just need to focus on gettin’ better, like your mom said. Those memories are still there, somewhere inside that gorgeous head of yours, it’ll just take time.”

He hoped, anyway. But if you truly never got back all your memories, he would be able to accept that, because at least he still had you. 

You nodded and cuddled under the scratchy sheets of the hospital bed. “I’m going to try to sleep for a little longer, okay? My head’s a mess right now. Well, more than it was before,” 

Tyler hummed in understanding, reaching over to lace his fingers with yours. 

He stayed beside you while you slept, and around fifteen minutes passed before the door opened and Dr. James walked in. “I saw that her parents are here and wanted to check on her, make sure she isn’t overworking herself,”

“No, they were easy on her,” Tyler answered and James nodded. “Hey, um…before they got here, she remembered somethin’ that happened kinda recently. A bonfire party we threw a few years ago…”

The doctor raised his brows and stepped further into the room, being careful not to make any unnecessary noise. “Well, based on her recent memory tests we did and now this, it seems like it’s improving,”

Tyler didn’t want to get his hopes up, so he just shifted casually in the chair, keeping his voice low. “So she’s gettin’ her memory back? Slowly?”

“While there are signs of improvement, nothing is certain,” he explained and Tyler didn’t feel as deflated as he would’ve had he allowed his hopes to overtake the rational side of him. “Recovery isn’t always linear. There will be setbacks and periods when progress feels nonexistent. But, the fact that she remembers something from a more recent time in her life is a big step in progress.” 

“So it’s possible for her to remember our relationship? Most of it, anyway?”

“That might take a bit more time,” he answered quietly. “Memories of loved ones are deeply rooted in emotional connections. While her short-term memory is improving, moments from a few years ago or more will likely start to return. It’s an unpredictable process that can’t be rushed.”

Tyler wasn’t sure if he properly understood a single word of that, but he knew that you remembering the bonfire was a good sign, and that’s all he needed to hear. “Did her father happen to ask when she is allowed to leave?” 

James laughed quietly. “Oh, yeah. He mentioned how eager she is to get out of here, and I don’t blame her. She’ll have to stay here for another couple days,” he told Tyler. “Since we’ve concluded that her head was the only severe injury she received, and since we can’t do much about her memory loss, we can’t keep her here for much longer.”

Tyler held back a smile as he nodded, glancing over at you. “Thank you,” he whispered, his attention fully on you now since he knew he would be taking you home soon. “I’ll let her know when she wakes up.”

Dr. James nodded before leaving the room, and Tyler moved the chair closer to the bed. He couldn’t wait to go home. He hadn’t been there since your accident, and he missed the familiarity of the house he shared with you. He hoped that maybe being in a new (but technically old) environment would trigger something in your mind and it would lead to you remembering the moments you and he shared in the home. 

Ten minutes go by before your dad enters the room, a cardboard box in his hand and a timid look on his face. “She asleep?”

“Yeah,” Tyler answered and watched as your dad slowly closed the door before making his way to the other side of your bed and sitting down on the chair near the window. A smile formed on his face at the logo on the box, and he lifted a brow, “You couldn’t find anythin’ in the cafeteria?”

Your dad shook his head as he placed the takeout box on the bedside table. “No, nothing good enough for her. I just grabbed something nice from the place down the road. Doctor said it was okay,”

Tyler hummed, reaching over to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear while you slept, “She can go home soon, did he tell you that, too?”

“Yeah, I meant to tell her before I left, but thought you might’ve asked about it, too,” he grunted, his eyes softening as he watched Tyler sit back in the chair. “You’re part of the family, Ty, you know that. You’ve always been. I need you to know how grateful her mom and I are that you were here for her as soon as it happened. You were the one who found her and brought her in, right?” 

“Yeah,” Tyler mumbled, not wanting to relive the moment he saw you with that open gash on your head. “It was me and Lilly. She kept me sane while we waited.”

Your dad gave him a tight smile. “Tell her I said thank you. And thank you, Tyler. Knowing she wasn’t alone for a single second while we weren’t here…it means the world,” 

Tyler’s eyes stung a bit as he shook his head. “No need to thank me. You know how in love I am with her. I can’t live without her,”

“You and me both,” your dad laughed, his own eyes a bit watery. “Anyway, I do have to thank you. I want you to know that we appreciate everything you’ve done for her.”

“‘Course I do,” Tyler mumbled, sniffling and quietly clearing his throat as he felt himself get a bit annoyed at the fact that he didn’t have control over his emotions right now. “And you know I’ll be with her everyday once she’s back at home. We’ll take it slow.”

Your dad gave him a firm nod as your mom walked into the room, a frustrated look on her face. “How’s she doing?” she asked just as your eyes slowly opened. “Hey, sweetheart, how are you?”

“I’m fine,” you whispered, shifting so you were sitting up against the bed. “Why do you look so pissed off? And why does dad look like he’s crying? Why are you crying?” You directed that last question to Tyler, and he quickly looked away and tried to subtly wipe at his eyes. 

“I’ve been trying to get some time off work so we can stay here with you, but now my boss is being  a prick,” your mother mumbled, “You’d think after seven years of not complaining, working overtime and going above and beyond, I’d get a little sympathy. Son of a-”

“Okay, mom,” you quickly cut her off, a laugh escaping you after. “It’s okay. You guys don’t need to risk your jobs for me. There’s not much you can do, right? My head will heal, and no one can control my memories. Please, stay as long as you can, but don’t get fired for me. Please.”

Your dad opened his mouth to protest, but sighed instead. “We’ll stay as long as we can, honey. But you know I don’t give a rat’s ass about my job, right? You’re my daughter, you come first,”

“I know, and I love you both more than words can explain, but I can’t be the reason you lose your jobs,” you murmur. “You both know there’s only so much you can do, the rest is up to me.”

Your mother nodded, her angry expression softening as she looked down at her phone. “Oh, here he is again,” she muttered. “Hang on, sweetheart. Eat some of the food we got for you, okay?” She gestured towards the takeout box before stepping out into the hall, and you looked over at the table. 

“You guys got me actual food?” You asked in disbelief as you reached for it. 

“Yeah, I promise it’s better than the shit they serve here,” your dad grunted before standing up. “I’ll go get you some water.”

Then it was just you and Tyler in the room again, and you looked over at him with a sad smile on your face. “I feel terrible for making them come all the way here,”

“Don’t worry about that, babe,” he mumbled, taking your hand in his and pressing a kiss to the back of it. “I don’t think they’d be anywhere else right now. They love you so much. And so do I. Besides, I don’t mind sharin’ you for a bit.”

A blush takes over your face as you press your lips together. You meet his eyes and smile, and he loves you so much. Your eyes, your smile, your personality, all of it. 

“That smile,” he whispered, leaning over towards you. “I’ve missed it.”

You blush again and forget about the takeout box as you pull on his hand. “Come here…” you mumble and he stands up. “I just want to be close to you for a bit.”

Tyler sat down next to your thighs, “Is this better?”

“It’s perfect,” you grin up at him. “Are we one of those super touchy couples?”

A smirk formed on his face as Tyler settled next to you. “You mean, are we a couple who can’t keep their hands off each other?” He asked and you nodded. “Yeah. We’re definitely one of those couples.”

You smile and look down at the bed. After a few seconds, you let out a sigh. “I wanna go home,” you say quietly, looking back up at him with teary eyes. “I don’t even remember it, but I want to go there. I wanna go there with you.”

Tyler reached over and wiped your tears away, his brows furrowing in barely-concealed anguish. “You will, baby. Soon,” he promised. “Dr. James said you’ll only be in here a couple more days, then I’ll take you home and look after you myself.”

“Really? I can go home soon?” You asked, a hopeful look in your eyes as you gripped his hand tightly. 

“Yeah,” he murmured. “Real soon. For now, eat some dinner and let me do all the worryin’.”

You nod and smile at him, wiping away your tears before reaching for the box again, and Tyler held your hand the entire time you ate.

[redcrescentmoons]

Only You In The Room

Daniel Ricciardo x male!rockstar! reader

Summary: Everyone knows Daniel loves music. What they don’t know is his (slight) crush on the bassist from one of his favorite bands.

AN: Happy Daniel birthday gang! Legit celebrating this harder than my own birthday. Sorry for the lack of posts, I’ve been fighting some hardcore writers block and don’t have any original ideas, but i wanted to do smth for Daniels bday anyway. Hope you like it!

AN2: This is purely self indulgent im sorry

AN3: (after completion) lowkey thinking of turning this into a series, what do you think?

It was a well-known fact around the paddock that Daniel loved music. Scratch that; not just the paddock knew, anyone that knew anything about the driver knew about his passion.

While Daniel often put forward his love of country music, another genre he strongly appreciated, although not quite as much as country, was rock.

So when he found a small pop-punk band through social media, he immediately followed them, hooked from the first note.

Soon, he had every song committed to memory, and started mentioning them more around his friends.

Max quickly caught on to Daniel’s new find, and as he always did when the Aussie got excited about a new artist, he asked the older man to tell him about the band.

As Daniel spoke, Max quickly caught on to the fact one was being mentioned slightly more than his band mates.

"And what’s so great about that bassist, huh mate?" the Dutch questioned "What do you mean?" replied Daniel, a slightly confused look on his face. "C’mon man, you keep on talking about him. So why?"

Daniel’s face immediately grew red as he denied the accusation, and changed the subject quickly, which didn’t go unnoticed by Max.

Daniel had only known the band for a few months, but had the pleasure to have seen them grow considerably. He followed them throughout their first out-of-city gig, to their first show in another country, to their first tour. And in a weird way, he couldn’t have felt prouder of the group of boys.

As the london-based band announced their first european tour, Daniel felt overjoyed once he came upon the realization that with his race calendar, he would be in Europe at the same time as the band would.

He bought himself a ticket for their first show of the tour, in London, the very moment he realized it was a mere 2 days after Silverstone.

The Aussie couldn’t wait for Silverstone; despite passing it off as excitement for the race, it was clearly more.

By the time the race arrived, it had completely fled his mind, leaving him to focus solely on the concert.

His outfit was planned out, his ticket was ready, including the bonus one he bought for Max, and the anticipation was coursing through his veins.

He didn’t even take the time to properly enjoy Silverstone, just counting down the time until he saw the band he had loved since he first heard them.

When the day finally arrived, he felt so excited but there was just a little bit of nervousness mixed in there. He told himself it was nothing, but the Dutchman beside him had already figured out the cause of his anxiety.

The show was being held inside a small venue, also containing a bar. Daniel immediately downed an alcoholic drink in the hopes of calming himself down. Feeling it’s effect on his body already, he dragged his friend up to the front, where they managed to get to the edge of the stage.

As the opening band went on, Daniel found himself to quite enjoy them, but grew impatient by the end of their set.

When the lights came back on and the opener left, a couple stage hands walked out to switch out the stage. Daniel found himself blushing as he stared at the man setting up the bass; it was you.

As the people around him went to get drinks between the bands, the Aussie went in a trance watching you set up your bass pedals, chatting with the stagehands, oblivious to his watchful gaze.

As Daniel’s admiration for you grew at the way you refused to let someone else set your things up for you, he suddenly snapped out of it as Max waved his hand in front of his face, a small smirk hiding at the corner of the Dutchman’s lips.

Before Daniel had the time to question it, the lights dimmed once again and the band members walked out on the stage under colored lights.

As the applause roared surprisingly loud for the small crowd, Daniel found himself cheering particularly loud, and a large smile grew on his face as he made eye contact with you, noticing the slight blush that developed on your face.

You winked at him and looked away, turning to your band mate to get the show started. You leant into the singer’s microphone, yelling "Hello everybody! We’re Nervous Breakdown! This one’s called ‘Insomnia’ and we hope you love it!" You finished your tirade with your signature smile, a contagious cross between a grin and a smirk.

Daniel screamed some more, belting out the lyrics as they came.

As the night went on, Daniel found himself having the absolute time of his life. Even Max noticed how his smiley friend was even happier than usual.

In between songs, you would use your band mates microphone to joke around and speak to the audience, your high energy and excitement contagious, spreading around the crowd like wildfire. Not that Daniel needed it.

When you announced your last song of the night, Daniel found his happiness met with a sudden wave of sadness.

That sadness was, however, diminished when your lead guitarist announced you all would be outside after the show, if anyone wanted to stick around. Of course, everyone cheered, and you went on with your final song of the night.

Once you all had bowed, and waved, and walked off the stage, people started flooding out of the room, a certain amount waiting outside until you all came out.

Despite not seeing the band exit the venue, he could tell exactly when you and the boys walked out, as a loud wave of cheers erupted from the group of people.

Daniel sat patiently at the back, waiting to meet you, his ticket and a sharpie in hand, already rehearsing what he would say to you.

When the crowd started thinning, and you were finally visible, hair disheveled from jumping around, bass on your back, tired smile on your face, Daniel’s breath was taken away.

Max, feeling his companions nervousness, planted a comforting hand the on the Aussie’s shoulder, pulling him slightly closer.

"It feels weird when it’s the other way around don’t you think? Us waiting to get something signed?" Daniel chuckled at his remark, the Dutchman having succeeded in keeping his anxiety at bay.

When he finally got to you, he was the last one there. He had to admit, he admired you for staying throughout the whole group of people, knowing firsthand what that felt like, especially after a tiring concert.

When his eyes landed on you, the whole script he had prepared in his head disappeared completely.

As much as Daniel wanted to greet the band as a whole, he just couldn’t take his eyes off the young man in front of him, extending a slightly shaky arm towards you.

"Hi, I’m Daniel. Huge fan"

Part 2?

[johnnycakesswitch]

hi!! I love ur headcannons :D I was wondering if you can do some jally headcannons? <3!

Thank you so much that’s so sweet!! Of course I can <3 I’m assuming you mean like jally as a ship so that’s what I’ll do but if you didn’t mean it that way, the majority of these can be read as platonic as well :)

Tw for suicidal thoughts

• literally the definition of that song where the line is like “I just can’t come between them, they got their own thing”

• no one will ever truly understand their bond, it’s just a known thing that Dally and Johnny are the most important people in the world to each other

• they honestly can’t even pinpoint when they developed feelings for each other, they’ve just always felt so much love and affection toward each other so strongly, they just didn’t know it was mutual for awhile

• one night Dally and Johnny were taking a walk because Johnny had been down all day and even though he didn’t say it, Dally just knew and was determined to get him talking. So they’re walking in silence for awhile until Dally asks, “so are you gonna tell me what’s the matter, johnnycakes?” and Johnny just breaks down. He hadn’t let himself cry in a long time before that and the way Dally spoke to him was so genuine and concerned that he couldn’t hold back anymore. He told Dally that he didn’t know how much longer he could keep living like this and that everyone would probably just be better off without him and Dally is livid, not at Johnny, but because he doesn’t deserve to feel this way. So he tells him that he better not hear him say that ever again because he can’t live without him and “if you go, I’m coming with you.” And Johnny just looks at him for awhile because Dally makes him feel more wanted than anyone ever has. And in the heat of the moment, they share a kiss. That night they talked and while they both knew they wouldn’t be able to publicly be together, they only wanted each other, so they would take what they could get. No one else mattered to them anyway as long as they have each other

• Johnny will stay with Dally at Buck’s a lot and they’ll both squish into his twin bed. The only problem is, Dally moves a lot in his sleep, so Johnny has to be sandwiched between Dally and the wall or else he’ll accidentally be pushed off ✋😭

• they love going on drives together when Buck lets him have the car. Dally can do a really good Elvis impression and Johnny will take that to the grave because he knows if he tells anyone Dally will stop doing it

• speaking of Buck, he knows about jally because he walked in on them making out one time. That was one of the few times that Dally was genuinely scared, not even for himself, but for Johnny. He didn’t want to put Johnny in any type of danger ever. But Buck actually likes Dally a lot and cares about him, so all he said was “make sure to lock your door if you don’t want company” and they could both breathe again

• the gang was like. Not surprised whatsoever. They didn’t even rly tell them formally, they just figured if anyone reacts badly they’ll cross that bridge when they get there. So they just started being physically closer and kissing and stuff around the gang and they’re all like “about time”

• around the holidays at the Curtis house they always “coincidentally” wind up under the mistletoe. Total coincidence. Not because Soda keeps moving it.

• Johnny calls him Dallas when he’s exasperated with him 😭 so like at least a few times a day

• speaking of exasperated, the gang cannot stand playing football w them anymore bc they’re on opposing teams and literally can’t keep their hands off each other. Jally will tackle each other when it’s not even necessary just so they can be touching. “Oh wow Dal like how did I end up on top of you sorry about that 🤭” Ponyboy mad as hell because Johnny isn’t paying attention and Darry is carrying their team 😭

• will share clothes without realizing it bc a lot of their stuff looks the same. Like they’ll both have the same black shirt and sometimes they’ll be out wearing each other’s and the only way to tell is because Dally’s is a little big on Johnny and Johnny’s is tight on Dal but they never seem to notice

• Dally gave Johnny his ring and he wears it on a chain as a necklace

• cleaning each other up after rumbles 🥺 and Dally’s always like gushing over him like “glory John I didn’t know you had all that in you you looked so tuff out there” and you can hear Ponyboy like gagging in the background

• he’s a hater as if he and Curly aren’t the absolute worst either

• always napping together. Just laying in bed or on the Curtis’ couch or wherever honestly next to each other and just sleeping 😴

• Dally’s always trying to make sure Johnny gets enough to eat

• when Dally jockeys Johnny will come hang out with him when he cleans the stables after and tell him how good he did. He always comes to watch Dally, he never misses a rodeo 🥰

• Johnny likes to play with Dally’s hair since he canonically doesn’t grease it. He thinks is so soft and fluffy and Dally’s just like “my hair’s tuff Johnny 😒” and Johnny’s like “whatever you say Dal”

• modern day Pony would record himself third wheeling jally and make a TikTok to that sound that’s like “mama y papa”

That’s all I have for now!!

[prince-liest]

I’m a sex-repulsed ace, and reading the latest chapter of 666 (as well as your analysis here on Tumblr) made me realize that I have been subconsciously thinking about MY OWN sexuality from an allo perspective? And that it has kinda been messing me up?? Like, ever since I learned that sexual attraction was actually a Thing and that it’s Important To People, I had been carrying around a fear of being deficient in some way and not being able to love to the same extent as allos. (1)

Even though I know logically that’s complete garbage and totally untrue, I felt left out of the loop because people seemed to care strongly about this thing I couldn’t even imagine. Whenever it looked like a relationship might happen I panicked for a reason that I couldn’t understand. But now I’m starting to realize that it’s because I was subconsciously terrified of an ‘ulterior motive’ behind the other person’s reasons for wanting to be with me. (2) That part of the reason they even cared was because of something I don’t experience. So thank you, because this realization just clicked into place while reading your work. The thing is, this way of thinking was just internalized in such a way that I didn’t even realize it was there until literally this week. And I think you’re right; one of the main reasons behind that is because I’ve always consumed media written from an allo perspective. (3) If ace/aros are shown at all, they’re depicted as “lacking” and their character development usually revolves around being “fixed” by the story. When I was ~10 years old my mom sometimes let me watch the Big Bang Theory with her (looking back, maybe not the best decision). Anyways, there was one episode deep into the series where Sheldon (who for the past nineish seasons was probably the closest thing to mainstream ace rep) has sex with his girlfriend for the first time. (4) Afterwards, he says something along the lines of “that was better than I thought it would be”, and it’s presented as a Very Good Thing and a big step in their relationship. I think a lifetime of stuff like that makes it very easy to internalize aphobia and feel like the lesser part of the relationship. Or to feel like the other partner is making a huge sacrifice to be with you. That got wayy too long, sorry. All that was just a lot of words to say that I appreciate you. Take care of yourself!(5)

The portrayal of asexuality that you see in media being almost exclusively as you described is very tedious to me because it presumes that something is inherently lacking in aro/aceness rather than that feeling of "lacking" being something that is induced by societal norms. Actually, one of the things that I find additionally alienating is that fandom spaces specifically have been getting better and better about ace characters - but got damn does fandom not jive with aromanticism. Like, a character doesn't want to fuck? That's becoming a liiiittle more fine, it's 2024, we stan consent. But not shipping someone romantically?? Not so easy, now.

I'm glad that my work has been something that resonated with you in this respect! Alastor cares a lot about his reputation as a demon but is pretty blatantly a person who could not possibly give less of a shit about being "wrong" for not being experiencing romantic or sexual attraction. The explanation Viv gave at one point for his own understanding of himself (that he thinks he's just "waiting for the right woman") actually stuck out to me a lot because it's a very "well, nothing is wrong with me for not feeling anything, it's the world that's failed to produce a suitable person" perspective.

But having that kind of confident perspective of your own rightness in the world is really not often portrayed in media, or even in fandom, which even ten years ago was still in the throes of standardizing "Oh, no! Me, gay? These feelings are so wrong!" style m/m content and is honestly not that far off from essentially that for aro/ace characters.

Anyway, all of that is to say that there's not yet much out there that doesn't frame allo/amatonormative values as the default that "even aro/ace people can (and should want to) achieve," and that it's really fun to write a fic that is unequivocally from the perspective of a character who is aroace and doesn't see it as even remotely a fault in himself. Does he have moments where he's a little confused and trying to process how things fit for him? Absolutely. But he just doesn't strike me as the kind of guy who thinks he owes romance to Vox of all people, hahaha. I've written him trying to conform to allo/amatonormativity more with Mimzy, because I think the social standards of their time could push him into it, but Vox? Absolutely not, he does not respect Vox enough for it to even enter his mind.

And then, on the other hand, writing it from an aroace perspective centers the way that romantic and sexual interest can feel like a betrayal of a good thing. With a character like Alastor, it frames romantic and sexual attraction the same alien way that we usually see aromanticism and asexuality framed as.

In the end, this is just one of a plethora of different experiences that aro/ace people can have, but it's one that I really wanted to see represented more, so I'm very happy to write it. I'm glad that you're enjoying it!

[mattybraps10]

I Can See You | Brendan Brisson x Hughes!OC

Summary: Beer Pong and Lasting Connections.

Word Count: 786

By: M

Parts: part one | part two | part three | part four | part five

PART SIX:

“What do you want…” Brendan sighed, returning his head to his hands. “Dude, what’s up with you? You’re never like this, I don’t understand.” Quinn whispered, sitting beside Brendan and placing a comforting hand on his back.

“I just… I thought I was ready to see her again, I mean 3 years is a long time and… never mind.” He said, shaking his head.

Quinn just sat beside his friend, a confused look on his face as he tried to decipher the vague admission. He ran several scenarios through his head unable to comprehend the real reason for his behavior. It had never occurred to Quinn that someone would disregard their strict rules when it came to Phoebe. Before every teammate met her they were warned away and threatened with almost certain death (banishment from the Hughes household). Now that they were all adults, the rules had become more lenient, a testament to the trust in their friends. 

“I just don’t understand you Brendan. You guys were so close, and then… nothing.” Quinn said, standing up and walking toward the door.

“I know, I mean I don’t, not really. I just, I need a minute to think is all.” He said, leaning back on the couch, a tear falling from his left eye, a poetic reminder of the pain he’d caused for both Phoebe and himself.

“You know I’m here whenever you need anything.” Quinn reminded him softly, resigning himself to return to the ever-louder festivities outside.

–

“YOU CAN’T DO THAT!!!” Phoebe yelled, crossing around the table and tackling her youngest brother.

“GET OFF OF ME!??!” He screeched, batting his arms at her as if she were a wild animal attacking him.

Jack and Matty burst into laughter watching Phoebe take Luke to the ground. Luke had been slowly replacing cups when he felt the other team wasn’t looking, and Phoebe had caught him almost immediately.

“Oh my god! I leave for a second?!?! What happened???” Quinn sighed, walking through the sliding door.

“Luke cheated! He violated the sanctity of this sport!” Phoebe yelled, her arms in a loose, but secure, chokehold around Luke’s neck.

“Luke?” Quinn asked, clearly disappointed in his younger brother.

“Well I mean… Having Matty AND Phoebe together was basically cheating anyway I mean they literally haven’t missed a single shot?? How is that fair?” He pouted, knocking Phoebe off his back, and standing up.

“You guys are such children!” He responded, picking up the cups that had spilled during the commotion.

They all laughed as they cleaned up the spilled beer, stacking the cups for a later date. Matty and Phoebe had found themselves reaching for the same cup, laughing as their hands brushed. 

“Hey guys…” Brendan said, stepping onto the porch, effectively ruining the moment.

“Brendan.” Phoebe said curtly, a frown on her face.

“I’m sorry, I just… I really don’t know what came over me…” He sighed, dropping his heads into his hands once again.

“I- It’s fine Brendan, I know you didn’t mean anything…” Phoebe sighed, resigning herself to her ever-repeating fate. A life of chasing the man she knew she could never have, one she’d thought she’d left behind when she’d been with Matty. A faint glimmer of a different path, obscured by the leaves of a past love.

“Phoebe, why don’t we go inside and grab some hot chocolate, it’s getting kinda cold.” Matty said, placing a hand on her back as he steered her past Brendan and into the safety of the kitchen.

Matty began preparing the hot chocolate, asking Phoebe about school and life and the future. She felt herself opening up to him, her past with Brendan a distant memory with Matty’s presence. She was confused. Confused as to how she could feel so strongly about a man she’d just met. Confused as to why she still wanted Brendan, despite her earlier realization.

Matty finished the hot chocolate, taking a sip of his own as he offered Phoebe a mug. She grabbed the mug, wrapping her hands around the warmth. 

“Why don’t we watch a movie on the couch?” Phoebe asked, grabbing Matty’s hand and leading him to the living room, a gentle smile painting her face.

“Jackson” He said suddenly, a blush creeping onto his face as he sat beside Phoebe.

“Huh?” She asked, confused about his random comment.

“My middle name, it’s not Ingrid, it’s Jackson.” 

“Oh. I like that! Thanks for telling me.” She smiled, grabbing a blanket and draping it over them.

Even though his middle name was far from a secret, Matty found himself entranced by her thanks. She made it seem as if he’d shared a piece of himself with her, one she was proud to keep.

[deanstead]

The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

Pairing: Will Halstead x Reader

Requested: yes, by anon

Summary: Will finally voices his frustrations, and you let your emotion take over, snapping back at him for the first time.

Word Count: 1.2K+

Square Filled: First Fight for #resa.3kfiestabingo

Warnings: insecurities, allusions to past abusive relationship

A/N: I am alive! I took forever to finish this and was this <> close to scrapping the whole thing. Thankful for bestie beta services @sheetsonfire hehe. Anyway, hope you guys like this! First fic of the year being a Will one is kinda interesting hehe.

WILL HALSTEAD MASTERLIST

“Halstead, I think you could do better.”

You froze, midstep on the way back to the table where Will and his friend were now seated, a cold feeling seeming to seep through your body as you heard his friend vocalize every insecure thought that had ever crossed your mind.

Even though you and Will had been seeing each other for a significant amount of time, you’d kept a lot to yourself, especially negative parts of your life, your feelings. It was like you felt that you needed to do more in order to deserve to be with Will. And even that, didn’t seem to be enough.

The lesson you’d learned from your previous relationship still resonated strongly in you - no one would love all of you.

So with Will, you’d been extra careful and yet…

Will glanced up from where he’d leaned in to say something inaudible to his friend, and you registered the look of alarm on his face as he saw you but you straightened your expression into a smile before you finally made it back to the table.

“Come on, we’re leaving.” Will said and you glanced at him in surprise.

Granted, you knew that drinks with his friend wasn’t what either of you had planned for when you’d left the house that evening. It was just an old friend from med school that had recognized Will and joined them for a drink or two. But you thought Will might have wanted some extra time to catch up with a friend he hadn’t seen for a while.

But Will just took your hand, threading his fingers through yours and nodded to his friend, before pulling you gently out of there, taking a paper bag from the waitress before the both of you walked out the door.

Will was quiet on the way home, even though he glanced at you a few times, to which you just returned a quiet smile.

It was only when the both of you had crossed the threshold into the apartment that Will spoke. “Y/N, look, I’m sorry. I should never have inflicted Brad on us.”

You smiled, shaking your head as Will put the bag down. “It’s fine, Will.” You shrugged.

Will looked back at you.

You barely had any time to register the look of frustration on his face when he spoke again. “That’s enough, Y/N!”

You’d been with Will long enough to know it was a look of frustration more than anger, but his raised voice still made you freeze in your tracks.

“Do you realize that’s the one thing you’ve said to me over and over? It’s okay, I’m fine, It’s nothing. But that’s all they are! They’re words. Words you don’t even mean!” Will’s frustration seemed to be pouring out now, the words cutting into you.

And before you could stop yourself, for the first time ever, you snapped back at him. “What do you want me to say Will? He’s your friend. Am I supposed to tell you I’m upset? That what he said struck a chord with me? That I didn’t need to hear all of that, because I know. I know you could do better! But what the hell am I supposed to do?”

You felt the dread spread through you as the last sentence left your lips in half a sob. You’d done it. Now, you’d really ruined it.

“This is exactly what I’m talking about!” Will said, his tone still sharp as he swept his hands out to make a point.

And instinctively, you flinched.

Will froze, his hands still in midair.

You froze as well. Just tonight alone, you’d unconsciously shown Will more negative sides of yourself than you had over the past two years.

“Y/N…”

You felt the tears spring to your eyes and you dropped your gaze, stepping back gently away from him.

The frustration fell off his face, the frown in his eyebrows now only signifying worry as the realization hit him and his frown deepened.

“This is what you haven’t told me, isn’t it?” Will said quietly, no trace of the frustration or anger in his voice any longer.

You didn’t answer him, your eyes still cast downwards. “I’m sorry.” You whispered, a tear sliding off your nose.

“You should have told me.”

You dragged your eyes up to look at him uncertainly as a little sigh escaped your lips, the tears pooling in your eyes once again. “I hate myself for being like this.”

Will didn’t say anything, like he was waiting for you to go on.

When you didn’t say anything, Will filled the silence again.

“You could have told me.” Will repeated, his voice more gentle now as he squeezed. “If I had known…”

You closed your eyes, preparing yourself for the inevitable. You should have known that no matter what you did, things would always have ended up like this. Will was going to tell you that he was going to go, that things were over.

Then you felt it, his hand closing around yours gently.

Your eyes flew open in surprise, meeting Will’s sad ones.

“I shouldn’t have pushed you. If I had known, I wouldn’t have pushed you. I’m sorry, Y/N. I…”

Your eyebrows bunched together as you tried to process what Will was telling you.

Will paused now, reading your expression. “You…”

Will let out a short breath, before he gently pulled you closer to him, wrapping his arms around you. “I’m not him.”

“I know.” You whispered, even though your voice was muffled into his shoulder.

“And I’m not going anywhere.” Will’s voice was firm, even though his voice was still gentle. “You’re not getting rid of me.”

You felt the tears well up in your eyes again, even though they were almost immediately soaked up by the shirt that Will had on.

Emboldened slightly by the fact you hadn’t pushed him away, Will tightened his arms gently around you, pulling you even closer to him and cradling you against him. “We’ll take it one step at a time alright?”

Will pulled away gently so he could look at you before he continued speaking. “For the record, you can always tell me when you’re upset. I love it when you’re happy, you know, the way your eyes crinkle when you’re laughing, or the sparkle in your eyes when you’re really smiling. But I’m here for everything, Y/N. The good, the bad, the ugly. It’s okay to tell me if you had a bad day, it’s even okay for you to curse people out with me. I love you. All of you.”

You blinked back at him, the tumble of words he’d just uttered now just hanging in the air between the both of you.

“Everything?” You asked, a little tentative now.

“Everything.” Will affirmed. “I know it’s not going to be easy for you. But we can take this one step at a time, alright?”

You nodded quietly, your eyes looking back up at him.

“Maybe the next time I see Brad I’ll punch him.” Will said, which made you laugh.

You shook your head, stepping back in for another hug. “Jay will kill you if he has to bail you out.” You responded, laying your head gently against his chest.

Will gave a grunt of acknowledgment before he pressed a kiss to the top of your head, his arms snaking around you in a tight hug once again.

THANK YOU FOR READING!! PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THOUGHT OF THIS!!

If you want to support me, buy me a coffee!

[hugsandchaos]

Guys I just realized something

Remember how Eclipse wanted to turn the world into a food source?

And you know how Sonic Boom Shadow clearly doesn’t like people?

I’m not saying we combine it, I’m saying we give Boom Eclipse’s view of the world basically Modern/Mainstream Shadow’s view!

And this Boom Shadow has a soft spot for him. At first, it was a sort of self-given obligation. Shadow felt absolutely terrible that Eclipse so strongly believed that Shadow was the only thing he could actually call family because they share the same blood thanks to their father, who was very disappointed when Eclipse rebelled and…

We’ll get into details much later.

Anyways, so Shadow knows he’s not the best person. He doesn’t even consider himself a good person anymore because of his grown dislike for people. So for Eclipse to have seen how he acts and still think that he’s a much better person to call family than those he grew up with was like a missile that destroyed the walls Shadow put up around his heart with enough force to still hurt it once it got through them all.

For a moment, Shadow remembered the better times. He waited a bit to be sure that Eclipse wasn’t lying about any of it, but once he was, he made an unspoken promise to Eclipse to be the best big brother he could be and made it a mission to ensure that Black Doom would never hurt him again. (Eclipse heard Shadow’s mind when he came to that decision, but Shadow didn’t know that they could communicate telepathically at the time.)

From that moment on, many of Shadow’s decisions were made with Eclipse in mind. One example is Shadow could go for pretty much his whole life without food and water, and given his situation, he pretty much abandoned getting it. However, Eclipse and the Dark Arms needed food and water daily, and meat was their best food source. Eclipse didn’t like the idea of hurting people, though, so Shadow often had to look for other methods to getting meat than hunting.

Either that or he’d get fake meat healthy enough to pass as real meat. Eventually, the obligated feeling melted away into something much more genuine. I mean, it was genuine before, but now that he knows his brother better, it’s even stronger than before. He’s a surprisingly great brother and friend to Eclipse. This Shadow isn’t completely heartless, but most of his love and care is reserved for his brother.

Actually, you know what would be super sad? After becoming friends with Team Sonic and joining them, Black Doom appears for Eclipse and Shadow back to use them both. Team Sonic has no idea what’s going on and Eggman’s actually horrified that Black Doom intends to use their planet as a food source. Eclipse remembers his treatment before and really doesn’t want to go back. Shadow’s ready to defend his brother, and now, their new friends.

After a fight against another wave of Black Arms sent to kidnap Eclipse and Shadow, then slaughter everyone else, many of the members are tired and injured. It’s one of those really dark hours and they genuinely think that this is truly the end. They don’t know what to do.

Shadow’s never been more sure of what to do until that moment.

He takes off one of his inhibitor rings and puts it next to Eclipse, who’s still unconscious, but healing very well. He turns to everyone and says “When he wakes up, tell him I’m sorry. Tell him “He’s our father, but you’re my brother” .” and then he disappears.

Hours later, after Eclipse is awake, he sees the ring and frantically asks where Shadow is. When they tell him what he said and that he vanished, Eclipse freaks out like never before and rushes outside, screaming Shadow’s name and “no” over and over. Team Sonic goes with him to make sure he doesn’t hurt himself. They can’t stop him because he keeps trying to control their minds so they’d let him.

When they reach the beach in their search for Shadow, there’s a huge explosion in the night sky as if from space. Soon, a golden glow falls from the explosion and into the ocean. Eclipse knows what it is. Or rather, who it is. Devastated and heartbroken, he drops to his knees and screams his brother’s name as loud as both his verbal and mental voices will allow.

Shadow went to the Comet, directly into the heart of the beast, took the chaos emeralds held inside, and removed the rest of his inhibitor rings. This time, there was no miraculous recovery.

[taylortruther]

rae!! i need help!! this will be long!!

i broke up with my boyfriend this morning (i’m moving away temporarily and maybe permanently, didn’t feel right about committing to long distance without it feeling totally confident we could work out in the long run) and have been regretting it HARD ever since. I was back and forth on it anyway because by the time I realized how strongly I felt about him I had already planned my travel, signed my lease etc. this is my fourth relationship but my first time being the the one doing the leaving. how do I know if the regret is real or just a reaction to how badly I’m going to miss him/ how awful dealing with the aftermath will be?

personally what helped me the most was writing a VERY honest note or journal entry listing the reasons i couldn't be with him anymore. why i was so unhappy all the time, the things I couldn't stand, the essential things i needed in a relationship that i wasn't getting. also, things that we had tried to fix and couldn't. i mean, the note is really hard to read now because it literally has things like "you cried every time you left his place" like what the fuck was i doing 😭 but breakup remorse is powerful. so i'd recommend that. it's hard! it really is! i felt like reaching out of loneliness multiple times but i would tell myself "if this feeling lasts until tomorrow or next week, i'll call" and it never did. i'd cry for a few hours and go to bed and the next day feel okay. i'd feel bad again but rarely for extended periods of time.

sorry you're going through this bestie. wishing you well!!

[freedomfireflies]

Okay, okay, okay. I have so much to say and I feel like I’m going to combust. Deep breaths as I try to get my thoughts and body under control.

First, I’ll just say… are you fucking kidding me? The girl in your new pfp is… you? Jesus Christ. You are literally. The dream….I don’t even know what to say. Wow. Blown away. You’re beautiful and precious and we must protect you at all costs. I’d follow you into battle. You are Y/N. And *don’t* argue with me. I already saw you do it with another anon. Sit there and take the compliment like the good girl you are (sorry, couldn’t help myself).

Okay, I can feel the shakiness creeping back into my body as I divulge on the second topic… Infinite You.

You know when you read something that just feels like it scratched the *perfect* itch in your brain? And maybe you didn’t even know it was itchy in the first place? When you read something that feels like someone ripped the words and feelings right from inside of you? Have you ever read something and thought, there’s not one part of this that doesn’t feel like it isn’t actually me? Like excuse me, who let this stranger know and understand me in such an intimate way?

I got so lost in Infinite You. I forgot I was reading. I felt like I was living it. And it was… unnerving. Eery. Uncanny. Like I physically I had to go somewhere private to continue reading it—and not for the obvious reasons, get your mind out of the gutter—but because I couldn’t keep reading *and* pay attention to how I was responding or my surroundings while I was. I didn’t want someone to see my facial expressions, or for someone to realize that every muscle in my body was strung up in nerves. I wanted to scrunch up into a ball and let myself… disappear into it. Let my eyes widen or my mouth smile or my cheeks flush and not worry about being seen. Because I was so deep in it that I physically *couldn’t* control any of those things (And I’ve gotten pretty good at schooling my expressions—reading so much smut in public, ya know.) And maybe that’s because I already felt so exposed, so vulnerable while reading it. I’ve read plenty of fics that made me giddy, made me blush, made me feel like I was glowing from the inside out. But by the end of this one, I was… tired. Like I’d gone through it too (minus the intense ecstasy of actually having mind blowing oral and penetrative sex with a perfect version of Harry lololol).

This is all probably coming out *not* sounding like a compliment. But I’ve meant it that way, I promise. I think it’s a testament to how brilliant and vastly unique your brain is. That you’ve created so many wonderful worlds and characters, and the fact that they speak to someone different each time. You are an incredible writer. And this one in particular, spoke to me (an anonymous user who you don’t know and therefore my last statement holds no meaning to you). But it means a lot to me.

So anyway. Sorry for spilling my guts all over you. I just… did not expect to be so affected when I started reading it.

Um… and again sorry if that didn’t sound like a good thing. It was. “Sad is happy for deep people”

So sorry for taking SO long to answer this, but please know, the moment I read it, I nearly burst into tears!!!!!!

This is truly one of the nicest things I could ever hear!!!! Honestly, I will never be able to thank you enough for taking the time to read the story and feel strongly enough about it to send me this 😭💞💞💞 I will be printing this out and plastering it all over my wall so I can look at it every day and smile!!! You are such a gem and I don't even have the words for how much I appreciate you!! Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!! Will be crying indefinitely 😭💞

[greenlotusleaf]

Feel free not to reply. Sorry in advance for this big ol paragraph. I’m not the original gender transformation anon but I am someone who tends to read a lot of that topic and seek it out. I want to thank you for responding to that anon because in a weird way I felt like it answered a question I had been wondering for myself but didn’t ask but really needed to see. Ive always wondered if my fascination and fantasizing of transformations/ magical gender shifts meant something more I needed or felt internally. Once before I had read an article where someone felt similar to how you mentioned - realizing that their fascination with that kind of thing really started the conversation internally to them that they were trans. I kind of shrugged it off as being another persons one case (my denial) and have hidden a little behind my other fetishes (example; liking pregnancy + being born female = should makes sense?) while also purposely avoiding others that would possibly, strongly counter that (ftm transformation, mpreg, MM literature, male body idolization, anything with transformations/ curses where the love interest still accepts them wholeheartedly changed (typically into a man), loving pregnancy but absolutely not on myself - loving idea of impregnating others.) I also unfortunately do not have any trans, or even non-binary friendships in my life so I’ve never really known how people have realized or knew these things about themselves, or let myself do research, or honestly ever spoken about it. I’m very bad at shrugging off what are probably big signs in favor of how I’ve always lived/ things have just been. But something about seeing your reply and it reminding me of that article I read a couple years back and the stories being similar and them also kind of mirroring what I’ve been feeling lately.. man. Anyway, so sorry because this is not the vibe. I don’t usually interact with posts or send asks and didn’t mean to personal dump because I know that is not what you were looking for. Only wanted to express how your response meant a lot. Love your work and am very glad I follow!

I originally wasn't going to reply to this, as your suggested. But anon, I am wondering how you're doing, and sending positive vibes. If you want to, please feel free to reach out and say hello. I hope you're doing well, and I hope you're finding your authentic self.

[lovedistrict]

im not sure if this is the right place for this but i looked up “relationship advice” and found your blog, so i hope it is. anyways, i think i have a crush on my best friend. we’ve been friends for a little over a decade now and ive always felt very strongly for them but i think im just now realizing it might be love. im still not 100% sure tho, as i previously suspected that i was aromantic, but i definitely at least want more out of our relationship. ive been dropping a few hints to them about it but im not sure if they’ve picked up on it or not. i also dont know if the feeling is mutual since they havent said or done anything hinting towards it themselves. im not sure what to do and am asking anyone i can for advice. do you have any? totally ok if not :)

Hi. Sorry I didn’t see your message earlier. Can I still help you with this? Message me back pls.

[glystenangel]

Better in Love

Bodyguard!Toji x Brat&Afab!Reader (Historical AU)

Series Summary: you're the daughter of a feudal lord, and Toji becomes your bodyguard. then, you fall in love

Chapters: 5/5

Chapter Summary: you and toji find your way back home

Status: Completed

Tags/Warnings: 18+ MDNI, corniness, reassurance, cuddling 'n' kissin, mentions of previous sex

~1.6k

thanks for reading and enjoy<3

Ch. 5 - Better

The next morning, you were sure Toji would have to continue his promise to carry you back home. Your entire pelvis felt sore, and your shoulders still carried pins and needles from the amount of orgasms that seized your muscles until late into the night. Toji seemed drunk on the way your body twisted around his cock and tongue, so he hadn’t been sympathetic to you after the first few rounds. The memories made you salivate. Even in this state, you would oblige his every whim and then some without hesitation. As cruel as he was, he made sure to keep your pleasure at the forefront of his mind and told you how good you were every chance he could. At one point, it was all he could say against your neck. Although you could hardly move, you were sure you would be worse off if you hadn’t caught him in time before he left.

At that thought, your eyes opened and you startled fully into the waking world. Panic rushed through you, but then you felt Toji’s chest against your own and the unmistakable feeling of his arm around your waist.

“‘S the matter?” He grumbled, and you instantly relaxed into his touch.

When you didn’t answer, he nudged his chin against the top of your head.

“Thought I was leaving again?”

You looked up and shyly nodded, and he sighed as he drew you up to meet his eyes.

“I’m not going anywhere. Promise.”

“Why did you try to yesterday?” You meekly met his gaze, the worry settling into your stomach and showing in your eyes.

The dark haired man let out another sigh, studying your pouted lips and thoughtfully playing with the ends of your hair.

“I haven’t loved anyone else for a long time. I suspected you didn’t reciprocate my feelings as strongly…and then there was the whole arranged married thing. I sure as hell wasn’t gonna stick around just to watch you marry another man. I didn’t think I could measure up, still don’t. I got nothing to offer you.”

The explanation made you soften, “You’re more than enough! And truthfully, I don’t think I fully realized how I felt until we argued about the arranged marriage. I’m sorry, Toji.”

“As long as we’re together now, it doesn’t matter.” Toji shrugged, a smile adorning his handsome face.

You shook your head, “No, really. I want to apologize for not letting myself realize sooner. I regret not being able to love you and give you the love you deserve sooner. I want to be with you and make you as happy as you make me.”

“So sweet, you tryin’ to make me blush? Huh?” He teased, kissing at your cheeks.

Your heart swelled at the affection, and you intertwined your arms around his neck as he pressed his lips against yours.

When you finally broke apart, he caressed his hand up your back.

“Don’t worry too much. Everything happened as it should, and I want to keep you happy too.”

You hummed in agreement, giving him another peck on the lips before looking around the sun filled room.

“We should probably head back soon though. My father is more of a worrier than I am.”

“Head back? I know I was supposed to take you home, but at this point we’d be better off running away together. I don’t think your father would be too happy about us.”

You brightly laughed, “I think he’ll understand. I want to at least talk to him before we decide to become runaways. Plus, I know where he keeps his gold in case we need some of it. If it comes down to that anyway.”

“Good idea, I can fight off the guards while you go get it.”

“Let’s at least try to be positive.”

The dubiousness in Toji’s expression remained, but he gave you a subservient nod after stretching with a yawn, “Alright, doll. Let’s go after we bathe.”

_________________

By the time Toji and you made it back to the estate, the servants greeted you both with news that your father had been pacing the grounds since you ran off and was anxiously waiting for your return. Twinges of guilt entered you, and you asked where they had seen him last. Once you figured out his location, you and Toji rushed to find him.

“Father?” You poked your head into his office, where he was rapidly pacing back and forth just as the servants had described.

“Oh, thank god!” He jumped at your appearance, coming to your side and holding your face in his hands.

At first he angrily bombarded you with questions, and then upon noticing Toji, his expression soured.

“Toji, if anything happened to her I swear-”

“No! He’s done nothing but take care of me! I love him! We love each other.” You turned to cover Toji from your father’s rage, and your father seemed to shake his head in disbelief.

“What?”

Toji carefully took over your protective stance, stepping forward and placing his hand over yours as you hugged his side with conviction.

“It’s true. I’m sorry for all the chaos this has caused. Please, don’t be upset with her. I take full responsibility for everything and if you can overlook all of this, I’d like to ask if I can court your daughter with the intention of marriage.”

A long, drawn out pause spread between you, and you nearly fainted when your father keeled over with loud laughter. Toji and you exchanged surprised glances, and you were afraid the stress had mentally incapacitated your father.

“Please, I know this was all her doing. Do as you wish.” He wiped at a stray tear, and you struggled to comprehend his statements.

“Wait, what?” Confusion was written all over your features, and your father gave you a light yet reprimanding slap on the cheek.

“You’re the troublemaker. I assume you dragged him in, so I’m not inclined to assign blame to him.” He sent Toji a sympathetic look.

Your jaw dropped, and Toji fought back a snicker as your father sighed.

“I’ll let the suitor know you’re…no longer interested. As long as you have someone to take care of you, I couldn’t be happier. That’s all I wanted before I passed on the estate to you, my dear. I promised your mother that I would ensure you and your sisters were looked after. Today, I can say I’ve fulfilled that wish.”

The heartfelt admission made your eyes water as you regarded your father, your chest warming with affection. You could plainly see the age etched into his features, bags edging his eyes and his skin worn with wrinkles. For the first time, you sadly realized he was no longer the invincible lord you viewed him as when you were a child.

You removed yourself from Toji and embraced your father, tears making your vision watery as you mumbled against his shoulder.

“Thank you, father.”

“Take good care of each other when I’m gone.” He whispered, and you nodded into his clothing, too emotional to reply.

When you broke apart, he clicked his tongue and ruffled your hair.

“Such a wild one. Toji, make sure this one doesn’t get herself into trouble anymore. Ever since the last attempt, we’ve found the source of the kidnappings and they should cease after some negotiations I made, but keep her out of trouble anyway.”

“Impossible, but I’ll try for your sake.” Toji smirked, his eyes shining with bemusement.

Another guffaw left your father, “He’s a good one. Honest men are hard to come by. Don’t take him for granted.”

You rolled your eyes, the sockets briefly darkening your sight, “I can’t believe this.”

Your father gave you another hug, and then he kissed the top of your head.

“I’m glad you’re safe and back home. I hope the both of you will join me for lunch now.”

“We will.” You promised, beaming at Toji.

“Wouldn’t wanna miss it. Thank you, sir.” Your former bodyguard echoed.

“Good, come along then.”

_________________

After the meal, you had led your father back to his bedroom where he was able to assuredly rest from enduring the terrible distress you had brought him over the last few days.

Toji was patiently waiting in front of your own bedroom door when you returned, and instead of having him stand guard outside, you had invited him in to cuddle with you.

Now, you were tucked into his side, one leg swung across his body and his hand lovingly tracing down your figure as you stared into each other’s eyes with transparent endearment.

Feeling curious, the first question that came to mind escaped your lips.

“Are you happy?”

“‘Course I am.” He immediately responded, eyes moving across your face.

Toji’s familiar and comforting scent sank into your bones, and you held your breath as he rested the vivid green of his eyes on your inquisitive gaze. A faint exhale parted your lips, a flutter stirring your stomach as he drew his hand up from your waist to brush a thumb over your bottom lip. Encompassing his wrist in your hand, you kissed his thumb with such delicacy that he closed his eyes to relish the touch before opening them to look at you again.

His jet black lashes and hair framed his attributes exquisitely, and the corner of his jaw loosened before he swallowed a breath.

“You know, I never thought I would find love again. I was kinda right.”

Nestling deeper into your touch, he spoke in a soft murmur only meant for you to hear.

“Because I found something better…You.”

The End.

_________________

End Notes:

tag list: @brumous11

:') it's the end! i really enjoyed writing this dynamic and i absolutely adore historical era fics so i may write some more in the future! hope yall enjoyed too<3

← Previous Chapter // Start Again →

[huggybearsunshine]

Yours

[Sequal to Mine] Dean says the wrong thing and ends up needing some advice on how to be better.

Halfway through their meal, Dean had learned two things. That introducing Cas to new foods was going to be one of his favorite things and that he was starting to like having Cas there to sooth his mind when it started to take a turn.

His realizations seemed to also brighten the celestial within him, but it was like the Angel was trying to reel it in. Like his happiness was twinged with fear.

He wanted to know why but thought it best to have that discussion in private.

Cas’ nerves flared at the thought, and Dean couldn’t help but laugh lightly under his breath.

Sorry, the hunter thought to himself, I basically just pulled a ‘we need to talk’ on you…

Dean was met with Cas’ confusion and it inspired an image of Cas’ scrunched face and tilting head. The Angel’s humor lit within Dean, pulling a smile to his lips.

I forgot thinking it is basically like saying it to you, Dean reassured him silently, You’re so stoic most of the time- the insider knowledge is… I don’t know, it’s kinda fun, I guess…

Dean glanced up to find his Mom’s eyes on him, an expression on her face that he couldn’t place.

“Sorry, did you say something?” he straightened up in his chair.

“No, I’ve just,” she paused but seemed to decide to follow through anyway, “never seen you smile like that.”

Dean’s eyes widened and expression dropped, pulling an instant regret to Mary’s own.

She knows… Dean’s thought passed incriminatingly.

She looked down, busying herself with the fries on her plate.

Knows what?

Sam was painfully quiet and Dean didn’t dare look at him. Not that he could focus with the swarm of emotions coming from both himself and the Angel within.

Dean cleared his throat.

“I uh… I’m just happy everyone’s here and safe,” Dean offered before his thoughts could do any more damage, “Think I might turn in though… Today felt like a million years…”

He rubbed the bridge of his nose where a pressure had begun to build behind his eyes, but the Angel was quick to soothe it.

Thanks, Cas.

“Goodnight, Dean,” Mary touched his hand, and he squeezed before letting it go again.

“She set up in the guest room?” Dean asked, eyes cutting toward his brother as he stood.

“Yeah, get some rest,” Sam nodded, “We’re all good.”

“Yeah,” Dean nodded, suddenly nervous and swallowing a lump in his throat as he rounded the corner into the hall.

A need gnawed at the back of his mind until he inevitably broke.

“What is it?” he asked as they entered the bedroom and he could close the door behind them.

What Mary said to you… It scared you…

“Did it?” Dean asked, lacking anything better to say.

Yes, and… I’d like to know why if you’ll let me…

The word ‘you’ passed through their mind before he could stop himself.

What about me?

Dean just froze in place at that.

“Where do I start, man?” his resistance finally broke, “I don’t let people in…”

But you let me…

“Always let you,” he whispered gruffly.

Why?

“Because, Cas….” Dean ran a hand over his face.

The sudden rush of anxiety mixed with embarrassment and longing hit Cas as strongly as it did Dean. Only difference is that Dean was very familiar with the why behind this particular feeling.

What is this, Dean?

“You know what it is…”

I don’t… I need you to say it.

Panic set in, and Dean could feel Cas working to try to sooth it which only seemed to fuel the fire of disgust raging away inside him.

“Doesn’t matter…” he found himself hissing, “This isn’t happening.”

Nothing is happening, but Dean… your heart is racing.

“You’re stressing me out!” the hunter exploded.

I’m sorry. That was not my intention.

Dean was practically drowning in Cas’ disappointment and heartbreak.

And I think I understand.

“Cas, I’m-”

I’m going to give you some space…

“Wait, I really didn’t mean it- Cas…”

But the door closed yet again and Dean felt alone.

Way too alone.

“Sammy,” he found himself knocking on his brother’s door and running a hand through his hair.

“Dean?” he appeared in the doorway.

“I need some advice…” he pushed passed him into the room.

“Okay,” Sam eyed him suspiciously.

“Don’t say anything or I won’t be able to do this- seriously not a word,” Dean was stiff and his hands were clenched at his side, “Think you can do that?”

He turned his head to see his brother nod silently.

“Okay, I fucked up… Cas locked himself away ‘cause I’m a complete asshole… I keep shutting him down whenever he sees something I don’t want him to see or asks something I’m not ready for him to ask…” Dean spoke to the ground, “I don’t know what to do and I just keep saying the wrong things… But you’re good at that kind of stuff…”

“What kind of stuff are we talking about here?” Sam asked cautiously after a long enough pause that he thought he was safe to speak.

“Feelings…” Dean’s hand flexed at his side.

“Yeah…” Sam let out a held breath, “Yeah okay… So, first things first. I want you to say it- for yourself.”

“Say it…” Dean clarified dryly.

“Might make it easier to say to him,” Sam shrugged.

“So just say it now… to you?” he turned, looking at him like he was crazy.

“Why not?” Sam spoke patiently, “I’m your brother. Nothing you say is going to change things with us.”

“Yeah, okay,” Dean nodded warily, before taking a pause and then a deep, steadying breath, “I’m in love with Cas.”

A breath pushed out of Dean as his words settled, and panicked eyes found Sam’s.

“How’s it feel?” the younger of the brothers asked.

Dean took another deep breath, “I need to talk to Cas…”

“He’s gotta come back sometime,” Sam smirked.

“Right,” Dean shifted awkwardly, “Thanks, Sammy…”

“You’re welcome,” his grin grew into a more genuine smile, “Thanks for telling me.”

He nodded, then a thought, “You said first…” receiving a confused look, he clarified, “‘First thing’s first.’ First- As in second or third.”

“Second was ‘Talk to Cas’,” he replied as if it was obvious.

“Right,” Dean huffed before disappearing through the door.

“Good luck,” his brother’s voice called after him.

“Cas, come back,” he spoke aloud to himself as he stalked down the hallway, “Seriously, man, come on…”

Rounding into his room and shutting the door, he began to pace.

“Cas,” he grunted frustratedly, “How long are you gonna do this?”

He closed his eyes and squared his shoulders, trying to reach out to the Angel’s grace.

He supposed the block was mental, not physical so reaching out could alert him to undo the barrier.

Only problem was that Dean did it in the heat of the moment and wasn’t sure if it would happen again.

But just as he was about to give up, he felt it. A tingle down his spine at first, but what quickly turned to an overflow of liquid lightning overwhelming his senses.

“Cas,” he gasped.

What do you want, Dean?

Cas’ voice was raw and surprise settled over them which Dean would have to ask him about once everything was said and done.

“I want you,” the words dropped like they were made of lead, “I need to tell you… say it…”

Say, what?

“I’m in love with you,” Dean’s heart was pounding, and this time, the Angel didn’t rush to sooth his anxiety.

Instead, everything in him jolted and silence set in as a montage of the Angel’s emotions cycled, too fast for Dean to hold on to any of them.

He was lost, uncertain of what he had just done, and the not knowing proved to be too much.

“Is that okay?” the hunter asked quietly to the long stretch of silence, “You were going to figure out with us… being an us like this so I just needed to say it- get ahead of it, you know? But I’m sorry if this makes things weird…”

No, no it’s not… It doesn’t!

Dean’s anxiety broke as Cas’ thoughts and feelings quieted enough for him to interpret.

I love you too…

“Yeah?” Dean’s voice shook.

What does this mean?

Anxiety mixed with the elation swirling through them.

“What do you want it to mean?”

He was met with a strong panic, colored by the Angel’s uncertainty.

He tried to pour reassurance through the connection like Cas does, but wasn’t sure if it worked.

“We’ll figure it out as we go,” Dean smiled warmly, wanting to reach for him for real, “We need to get your body back… This is such a weird way to do this…”

I could try to heal myself in the morning but I’m not charged up enough yet… I would need to-

He tapped the hunter’s soul, sending a shiver up his spine.

“Do it,” Dean replied without missing a beat, and the feeling was immediate.

That same liquid lightning shooting through his body, but something was different this time.

Dean’s knees almost gave out beneath him, making him drop down to sit on his bed.

“Shit,” he breathed out as goosebumps covered his body, and Cas’ thoughts took a turn.

He was imagining Dean’s form with insane accuracy which pushed out a surprised hiss from the hunter.

“How do you know what I look like?” he shuddered out, and felt the cold embarrassment cloud the thoughts in their mind.

I rebuilt you… in hell… I know your every cell, Dean.

“Fuck…” he leaned back until he met the surface of the bed.

A flash in his mind of hands roaming over him had him jolting.

“I felt that…” he gasped.

The mind is a very powerful thing.

Cas’ voice sounded out of body for lack of a better term. Distracted, almost. Dean couldn’t imagine why.

“Cas, I want to… can I…” Cas saw his thoughts and knew exactly what Dean wanted to say but was holding back.

Yes. Please. Touch yourself.

He was met with a moan and Dean’s own roaming hand.

The hunter couldn’t be sure of much after that, too overwhelmed to retain any sort of clarity until he came to, breathing heavily in the aftermath as his body practically hummed.

“Wow…” is all Dean’s rebooting mind would allow, “That felt…”

Incredible.

Cas’ response was quiet but with an underlying contentment to it.

“I wish I could see you…” he added drowsily.

Soon…

“Soon,” his eyes started to flutter as sleep attempted to take him.

For the first time in as long as he could remember, Dean didn’t dream. His usual nightmares were nowhere to be found and he woke feeling better rested than he could ever remember before.

Cas…

It was Dean’s first thought and that fluttering feeling started up again in response.

Yes, Dean. I’m here.

“Good,” he groaned, stretching his arms out and feeling his muscles expand.

Oh, that feels nice…

“Yeah, it does,” Dean grinned, face smooshed into the bed, “Wanna try pancakes? Sam bought some blueberries I can steal.”

Cas agreed and a feeling of contentment settled over them.

With a heavy and somewhat begrudging sigh, Dean was on his feet, pulling his jeans on, and heading toward the kitchen.

He yawned as his feet padded onto the cold kitchen floor and it took a second to register that Mary was up. She was seated at the table there, book in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other floating halfway between her and the ring it had left on the table.

“Mom,” Dean’s pulse picked up a bit, “Hey.”

“Dean,” she smiled warmly, easing his anxiety at the sight of it, then it seemed to hit her, “And Cas! Good morning!”

This must be so strange for her, Dean caught himself thinking.

Yes, I would imagine so, Cas responded softly.

“Pancakes?” Dean offered, at a lack for words.

“Sure, sounds good,” she nodded.

Turning toward the cabinets, he began pulling things out that he would need when he heard his brother’s approaching footsteps.

“Oh hey,” Sammy pulled his headphones out, clearly post run.

Dean couldn’t bring himself to turn, uncertain of what Sam might say if he did.

You talked to Sam…

Yeah, before I pulled you back… Dean thought to himself.

“Cas back?” Sam asked with a poorly concealed smirk.

“Yep,” Dean answered shortly as he started portioning out the ingredients.

“Back?” Mary looked up in confusion, “He was gone?”

“He can shut himself away,” Sam explained.

“Did you two have a fight?” Mary’s brow knit in concern.

“Small thing, nothing to worry about,” Dean hurried through, “Everything’s good now.”

“Good,” Sam tapped the doorframe, “I’m gonna grab a shower and be right back. Don’t leave yet!”

“No rush, I’m staying for breakfast,” she responded as he disappeared back into the hallway.

The kitchen was then plunged into a heavy silence both in and outside of Dean’s mind and a sinking feeling pulled at his stomach.

“Go ahead,” he sighed resignedly.

“Me?” Mary asked, a little surprised.

“You’ve been looking at me like that since last night,” Dean added.

“Like what?” she asked as he turned to her with a raised brow.

“Like that,” he nodded toward her, and her face fell into a small smile.

“You seem different…” she admitted, “Happier.”

“I am,” he leaned against the counter for support as Cas’ grace sparked curiously.

“Can I ask why?” she whispered and leaned forward like they were sharing a secret.

It pulled a grin to Dean’s face as he looked down, gathering his nerve.

“I’m uh… I’m being honest about myself, I guess…” he stumbled verbally trying to find the right words, “Mom, I’m…”

He looked up again and froze at the knowing look in his mother’s eyes.

“It’s Cas, isn’t it?” she asked softly, attempting to help him out and his eyes softened gratefully in response.

“Yeah,” he spoke on a breath.

“You and Cas are-“

“Yeah,” he repeated.

“That’s great,” she assured him.

“Really?” his doubt poured out with the word.

“Yeah,” she nodded meaningfully.

Cas was suspiciously quiet so Dean nudged him to check.

I’m here… just… didn’t want to interrupt.

Warmth flooded his body as the thoughts surfaced in his mind and a pleasant hum escaped him.

“Pancakes,” Dean clapped after snapping out of his reverie and turning to continue the task.

“You want blueberries or no?” he asked over his shoulder as he fired up the stovetop.

“Blueberries, please,” she answered brightly, a lightness to the room that wasn’t there before.

“Blueberries it is,” he grinned to himself.

By the time Sam returned, Dean was serving the large stack of the breakfast to the table.

“Are those my blueberries?”

“Yep,” Dean felt a surge of pride, and he could practically see the Angel rolling his eyes.

——————

@spuffy-destiel @destieliscanon5nov

[blushled]

Love | Dallas Winston

MASTERLIST

other Tumblr: sunkissedspidey

taglist is open!

requests are open!

pairing: Dallas Winston x female!reader

summary: Your relationship with Dally was always weird, you weren’t dating and you definitely weren't just friends. But after he almost loses you, he realizes just how much he needs you.

warnings: smut, unprotected sex (please wrap it before you tap it), language, angst, fluff, etc.

word count: 3.7k+

a/n: Please forgive me for how gross and choppy this is! This is the first thing I’ve written in months!! Sorry for any spelling and/or grammar errors!

Your relationship with Dally had always been a little weird. Not by much, but definitely compared to the other guys.

You were the only chick in the group, and everyone in it had a phase at some point where they were completely enamored with you, all expect for Darry, mostly because he saw you as a little sister. But it was always special with Dally.

You had met Dally, and the rest of the guys, when you were 15, right after he had gotten back to Oklahoma from New York. You two were always close, and you were the only person he had ever opened up to, so it's no wonder that you two had lost your virginities to each other, and still have casual sex to this day. The both of you had an unspoken agreement to not tell anyone, but Soda had walked in on the two of you one time, so now it was only you three that knew the secret.

Anyways, regardless of the hours upon hours of sex that was shared between you at least once a day, your relationship was closer than anyone else in the group, even stronger than yours and Soda's, despite the fact that the two of you had been best friends since second grade.

You never really cared about the fact that Dally was sleeping with other people. I mean, it's not like you weren't doing the same thing. You'd had sex with Dally, then Soda one night after you had both gotten absolutely hammered beyond belief, and even Peter Torlini from school a few times. But it always was better with Dally. Not just because he was amazing in bed, but because you were positive that you were head over heels in love with him. And, goddamn, if he didn't feel the same way, he was amazing at faking it. Like, you don't always have that sort of connection with someone when you have sex. Your bodies became one, and you knew exactly what the other needed at that exact moment. Who knows... maybe he was just good in bed and knew what you needed because you had been having sex for so long, or maybe... just maybe; he felt the same way for you that you did for him.

***

"Fuck, Dally! Oh, my god!" You moaned out, his cock so deep inside of you that it had your head spinning.

"Goddamn," He breathed out, his face close to yours, same with the rest of his body, as he pumped into you at a fast, steady pace, a slight sheen of sweat covering both of your trembling, naked bodies. "You're so fucking good and tight for me. 'M not gonna last much longer, Y/N." He groaned out, his breathing heavy, along with yours, as he thrusted even deeper. He wrapped his arms underneath your head, tugging on your hair as you scratched down his back.

"God, please cum for me, Dallas." You moaned, his pace quickening even more so, leaving you screaming as your eyes squeezed shut tightly, your orgasm crashing over you, your walls clenching so tightly around his cock that he couldn't help but cum, quickly pulling out and helplessly spilling his seed all over your stomach as he let out load, drawn out moans, before his muscles gave out and he collapsed back on top of you.

Your hands ran into his hair as he gave you another hot, passionate kiss before rolling over next to you on your bed, reaching over onto the night stand to grab two smokes and a lighter, passing one to you before lighting both of them up, as you both smoked, and exhaled, simultaneously, your brains started to feel foggy with euphoria as the nicotine began to enter your bloodstreams at the same time.

***

A few weeks later, you and the rest of the guys were sitting around, just talking about nothing in particular, only until Two-Bit brought up a fun topic.

"I got it!" He said, a large smirk on his face. "Best lay... Aaand... Steve, go!" Pointing at the brunette with both hands shaped as guns.

"Uhm... Probably Gracie. Big tits." He laughed out, a smoke in between his teeth.

Everyone erupted with laughter, Ponyboy and Johnny rolling their eyes and turning their attention to the cartoons on the small television.

"Y/N! Your turn!" Two-Bit said, laughing as he took a sip of his third beer.

"Not telling." You laughed as you sat on the countertop. You rolled your eyes heavily and let out an annoyed sigh as everyone booed at you. "Ugh, fine," You said, closing your eyes. "Uhm, I'm not saying the name, but he was tall with brown eyes, massive dick, and goddamn, he knew how to use it well, dark hair, and also the best kisser I've ever met before."

    Dally automatically knew that you were talking about it, a smirk spreading across his face as you enthused about just how good the "mystery man" was in bed.

*** You and Dally sat in your old, run down car, eating Dairy Queen and talking about nothing in particular.

"You wanna know something funny?" He asked before licking the melting ice cream off of his waffle cone.

"Always." You smirked, turning the music playing on the radio down a bit so you could hear him more clearly.

"You're the best I've ever had, too." He said, smirking as your cheeks lit up a bright pink shade at his words.

"And why's that, Mister Winston?" You laughed, your eyes meeting his again as he leaned in closer to you, using his free hand to circle around your clit over your underwear, your skirt covering Dally's hand from the wrist down, your eyes slowly rolling back as you moaned quietly into his mouth.

"That's just one of the reasons. You're so goddamn sensitive and I fucking love it." He laughed when you whined after his touched left you, a small huff of anger leaving your lips at the loss of contact.

After a few seconds, you grabbed his ice cream and shoved it in an empty cup, his eyes meeting your with confusion before you moved over the center console to straddle him, your lips immediately going to his as you grinder your hips together, small groans leaving both of your mouths. You tugged at his leather belt, unbuttoning his jeans after, sliding his boxers down, your mouth watering at the sight of his hard cock.

    He reached around your waist and lifted your tight shirt off of you quickly, his soft lips moving to kiss all over your breasts and he left the occasional hickey, his cool, slender fingers i clipping your bra, before he started kissing up and down your neck until you were begging for more.

    "Dally, please." You whimpered, your body trembling from want.

    He moved your underwear over to the side, right before his cock slammed into you as he pulled your hips flush against his, both of you letting out moans because of how fucking amazing it felt.

"Fuck, Dally! Shit, you feel so fucking good!" You screamed out, glad that it was night and that no one was around the two of you.

"Goddamn, you're so fucking tight-" He said before a groan cut him off, his hands gripping your waist even tighter, bruises sure to be left there (not that you were complaining in the slightest).

    One of his hands moved down to your clit, rubbing it in harsh, fast circles as his eyes rolled back, your head dipping down to suck dark purple bruises onto the soft, pale skin of his neck, his hips thrusting up to meet yours in sync, his cock hitting inside of you deeper and deeper with each thrust, the other of you chasing yourself highs as best as you could.

    Your eyes clenched shut tightly as you bit down on muscles of his shoulder, your orgasm crashing over you so strongly that you could barley breathe. Dally's arms wrapped around you, scratching up and down your back and you tugged harshly at his hair, knowing that he was coming close.

    "Cum for me." You whispered into his ear, biting down slightly on his earlobe, and then that was it. He came with a cry of your name and a load groan, his cum coating your walls as you clenched around him tighter, his teeth sinking into your breasts as he continued to thrust up into you until his muscles gave out. Your collective breathing was heavy as you both came down from your highs, his hair sweaty as you ran your fingers through it, the smell of sex and cigarettes lingering in the small, cramped car.

    "Goddamn," He said, laughing as you sat back, moving your hair out of your eyes. "That was fucking amazing."

    "Isn't it always?" You smiled cockily, grinding your hips once more, causing another load moan to come from Dally's throat, partially because it felt amazing and partially because he was so fucking sensitive.

    "What'd I turn you into?" He smirked, biting down on the skin of your neck softly, his perfect teeth skimming your jaw as he made eye contact with you again.

    "A sex addict." You said simply, a smile breaking across your face as Dally started laughing at your blatant tone, his head tipping up to kiss you softly and slowly.

    The two of you had made an agreement not to do anything with anyone else after a while, figuring that it would save the both of you from getting jealous because, even though you weren't official, the both of you were super mad every time you walked in on the other with a different person.

*** "Oh my god, fuck off!" You yelled, laughing as Soda had beaten you in poker for the fifth time that night, the rest of the guys whooping and cheering as you flipped them all of, taking your shirt off, a black bra the only thing covering your chest. Strip poker was a weird game to play with a big group of your closest friends, but it had been a favorite of everyone's for years. Dally stood in the corner, a cigarette in between his teeth as he stared you down, his eyes dark with oust and squinted with anger.

"Alright," You said, standing up and putting your shirt back on, boos coming from the guys. "I think that's enough for me tonight."

You made your way to the bathroom of the Curtis' house, putting your hair up in a ponytail before you washed the dark eyeliner surrounding your eyes off, using a rag to dry your face before changing into an extra t-shirt and pajama shorts that you always kept there, since everyone usually spent the night there.

You walked out into the dark hallway, making your way to the living room before Dally pushed you up against one of the walls, his lips meeting yours harshly as one of his hands made its way into your loose shorts, his long, slender figures toying with your clit as you tried your best to control the volume of your moans.

"Never, fucking never, pull that shit again. You got that? You know how fucking hot you are, and you know how those dudes think about you." He said, his voice low and commanding, but a tone of sweetness underlying in it.

You knew that he wasn't mad, he was just worried, even though there's no way in hell that he would ever admit that to anyone. He was your best friend, and you were his.

*** "Oh, come on, Dally. It's not even that bad. It's just a movie." You whined, gripping onto his denim jacket.

"It's a stupid movie." He laughed as your head sunk even lower, your lower lip stick out as you widened your eyes, your face jokingly pleading.

    "Dallyyy, pleaseee?" You dragged out, kissing his neck softly.

    "Fine. But if I hate it, it's on you." He laughed as you squealed, leaning over and kissing his cheek. And after a second you both looked at each other and then moved away, realizing that you were acting more like a couple than like fuck buddies.

    "I'm- uh- I'm gonna go home. Gotta get ready, ya know?" You said, standing up from the couch at Dally and Buck's place, grabbing your purse and jacket, and waving goodbye to the brunette that had your heart.

***

    As you made you way back over to Dally's, you checked how you looked in the reflection of a storefront window. Your tight white t-shirt clung to your body perfectly, your black ripped jeans hugged your frame, and you had on your favorite jacket. A thick, worn, black leather one that all of the guys had gotten you for your birthday after they had pooled their money together, a switchblade, a pack of smokes, and a lighter in one of the pockets. Your black eyeshadow and eyeliner was done perfectly, and was an amazing contrast to your bright red lipstick.

    "Dally!" You smiled, wrapping him in a small, short hug when we opened his door, throwing a shirt on and leading you down the street towards the drive in.

***

    "I'm gonna go get some popcorn." You said to Dally, smiling as you stood up from one of the cheap, grey folding chairs.

    "Be careful." He said, handing you some money before turning his attention to the movie that he claimed was stupid.

    "Medium popcorn and a large Coke with two straws, please." You said to the worker at the concessions stand, handing him the money in exchange for your food and drink.

    You walked out of the concessions stand, making your way back until some shuffling on the side of the building caught your attention. You turned your head, and the second you did, you instantly regretted it. You saw Dally making out with Polly Winchester, her hands running through his hair as he pinned her against a wall. His eyes met with your for a second and he instantly pulled away, his lips smeared with her red lipstick and his breathing hard.

    "Oh shit." He said quietly, walking over to you, trying to take your hands in his, put you instantly pulled away.

    "You fucking asshole." You said calmly, turning away towards the exit before he grabbed your arm, and then you snapped. "Don't fucking touch me!" You screamed, the people sitting near you turning to look at the two of you.

    "Y/N, I'm sorry." He said, trying his best to reach out for you agin until you took the top off of your drink and threw it in his face.

    "Fuck. You." You said clearly, finally being able to turn and walk away, tears filling your eyes as you walked back to your house.

***

    A few days later, practically in the middle of the night, you were sitting on your bed, a cigarette in one of your hands as you used the other to flip through your favorite book, music softly playing on your record player in the background as you tried your best to ignore the ache in your heart at the fact that Dally was practically fucking a chick against a wall right in front of you.

    A knock on your front door shook you out of your daze, ashing your cigarette before making your way down the hall to your front door. The second you opened it, your heart sank, your stomach dropping as you saw Dallas standing there, a pleading look on his face.

    "C-can I come in?" He asked quietly, his hands stuffed into his pocket.

    You didn't say anything, you just opened your door more and stepped to the side, allowing him to walk into your small house.

    "What do you want? Another pack of smokes? I have some on the counter and a Coke in the fridge and then you can go back to the drive in so that you don't have to pay." You said blankly, sitting down on your couch as flipping through a book that was on your coffee table.

    "No, I don't need any of that. I just wanna talk." He said, standing next to the couch awkwardly.

    "About what? About how you basically fucked Polly during a movie that we were supposed to be watching together? About how you ditched me to go stick your dick in some whore on the side of a goddamn building?!" You said, not being able to control your volume as you stood up looking at him, absolutely fuming.

    "Yeah, pretty much." He answered, not knowing what else to say.

    "You promised me, Dally. You fucking promised." You said, your eyes boring into his.

    "I know, but listen-" He tried to say before you cut him off.

    "No, Dally. You listen to me. You are such a lying fucking asshole! I can't believe I ever thought that we could be something other than friends with benefits." You said, your eyes becoming puffy. "Fuck you, Dallas Winston. I never want to see you again." You said calmly through your teeth, silently seething. You turned towards the hallway to go into your room, before Dally grabbed your arm, your eyes meeting his again, both of your eyes red as silent tear streamed down your faces simultaneously.

    "Please, Y/N." He said, his voice not much louder than a whisper. "Please don't leave me."

    "You've never listened to me when I've asked you not to leave... Why should I listen to you?" You asked quietly.

    "Because I love you, Y/N. More than I've ever loved anything in my entire life. More than smokes and parties and beer. More than sleep and sex and rumbles. So please, Y/N... Please don't leave. And I'm so fucking sorry. I'm so, so sorry."

    "I love you too, Dally. So much more than you'll ever be able to know."

    At this point, his hands were tangled in yours, your faces close together as you both finally admitted your true feeling for one another after all of this time.

    "You do?" He asked, shock evident in his voice. "You love me?"

    "Of course I love you, Dally. I've loved you ever since we were kids." You whispered, your lips only inches apart.

    "Can I kiss you?" He asks softly, his hands going slowly and tenderly up to your neck.

    "Please."

    And with that, you lips met in the most perfect kiss you could ever think of, like your lips were pieces of a puzzle and were made to fit perfectly together. After a few minutes it grew more passionate, more lust filled.

    His hands went down to the back of your thighs, gripping them tightly as you jumped up to wrap your legs around his waist. The two of you continued kissing as he walked the both of you to your room. He placed you softly on your bed, kissing down your body as he lifted an oversized white t-shirt, that just so happened to be his, over your head. He kissed all over your chest and your neck, only stopping for a few seconds to shed off his leather jacket and black shirt, before immediately going back to your lips to kiss you as you moaned into each others mouths while your hips grinned against each other's.

    "Dally, please." You moaned, your hands smoothing over his back.

    "Please what?" He asked, looking at your with swollen red lips, a beautiful contrast to his pale skin.

    "Make love to me." You whispered, your lips close to each others until he closed the distance between your mouths.

    He kissed down your neck, chest, and stomach again as he pulled your shorts off of you, moving to kiss your inner thighs as you whined from the feeling that you missed.

    He stood up again to unbuckle his belt, taking his pants off not shortly after. You pulled him back on top of you, reveling in the feeling of his bare skin against yours. He took his length in is hands, lining it up with your entrance before stopping for a few seconds to stare deeply into his big brown eyes.

    "I love you." He whispered.

    "I love you too." You replied before you met your lips with his again.

    The second he thrusted slowly inside of you, you both let out moans at the amazing feeling. he started with a slow, tender pace as you breathed heavily into each others mouths, your eyes still staring into the others.

    "Oh my god." You moaned out, eyes finally shutting tightly as he continued to pump into you, his pace quickening as his groans started to grow louder and loader, along with your moans.

    "Fuck, I love you so-" He said, getting cut off as he groaned loudly. "I love you so much."

    "I love you too, Dally- Fuck!" You screamed, the feeling of him being inside of you so goddamn intense that you could barely speak coherently.

    And then it made sense. Every feeling that you had ever had for him made so much sense. Every time that he would look at you and smile at the completely ordinary thing you were doing, every time that he told you to call him when you got home, every time that his figures brushed against yours while watching a movie made sense. He had loved you even longer that you had loved him. From the second your eyes met his when you met, he was absolutely head over heels in love with you. He had never realized how much he needed to tell you until he almost lost you, until he realized how much he needs you.

    "Dally, I'm not gonna last much longer." You moaned, lips moving to kiss the sides of his clan shaven face and his smooth forehead.

    "N-neither am I. Fuck, please cum for me, Y/N. Please. God, I love you." He moaned before his head dipped down to meet your lips with his.

    And with a few more thrusts, you were completely spiraling underneath him, your whole body trembling as you came at this same time, his final few thrusts harder and deeper than before until he finally collapsed on top of you, his lips going to kiss your red cheeks as you both breathed heavily.

    "I love you so much. Please be mine, Y/N. Please." He said, his lips skimming yours.

    "I love you more, Dally. And I'll be yours, forever and ever and ever." And with that, you both fell asleep, all sweaty and gross. But you were sweaty and gross and happier than you had ever been before.

[beenovel]

A Frankly Hilarious Misunderstanding

Pairing: Kili x gn!reader

Word count: 2,103 (.... I have nothing to say for myself)

Warnings: none, misunderstandings for the purposes of comedy, not angst

Summary: Some minor human/dwarf cultural differences lead to major confusion. (AKA Kili is a himbo that doesn’t understand human customs)

A/n: This was a random shower thought that made me laugh until I slipped and @claraofthepen encouraged me to write.

Thank you to @claraofthepen @elvish-sky and @messiambrandybuck for beta reading!! Y'all are the best <3

Brief background: Y/n and your brother (Will) are humans that Gandalf brought along on the quest. Don’t ask me why, the spooky old wizard is mysterious. In your culture, it’s traditional for the courter to ask a courtee’s older relative if they can court. This will be important later. Also, homophobia isn’t a thing because I said so.

-

You lowered yourself onto a log by the fire with a grateful sigh. After a long day of walking, the thought of a hot dinner and sleep (even on the hard ground) was a relief. Thorin had called for everyone to stop right as the sun neared the horizon. This meant you’d had enough light to set up for the night much faster than normal.

Kili sat down next to you. He smiled and despite your exhaustion, you returned the gesture on instinct.

“Here,” he said while handing you a bowl of soup. You knocked your shoulder against his in thanks.

You, Will, Fili, and Kili had become all but inseparable over the past few months of the journey. Being so close in (relative) age, you all got along very well. You and Kili had grown especially close. He flirted with you non-stop and you had quickly fallen in love with him.

The only problem was that while Kili flirted with you quite a bit, he also flirted with everyone. Including your brother, though only occasionally. You were waiting to be sure he actually wanted to be with you, but if he made you wait any longer you were going to ask him despite your doubts. Patience is a virtue, but virtues are overrated anyway.

You looked across the fire to see your brother all but sitting on Ori. Dori did not look particularly happy about this. Your brother, on the other hand, was giggling like a ditzy maid at something Ori had said. You could see how happy Ori was at having made Will laugh, as he was looking at him with a small affectionate smile.

You wanted to walk over and smack their heads together for being so obtuse. Everyone could see how much they cared for one another but they were both too nervous to do anything about it. You had seen your brother face down a lone warg with nothing but a handful of dirt and a stick. And now he quailed at the thought of admitting his feelings for the quiet scribe. Ori seemed convinced that someone as brave as your brother could never love someone as quiet and shy as him.

You shook your head lightly in exasperation. Will had forced you to listen as he lamented his 'unrequited love' countless times. Despite your many, many (many) attempts to convince him otherwise (and all evidence to the contrary) your brother resolutely believed that Ori could never love him the same.

You thought back to the other night when you’d both been on watch.

“I’m just some human,” Will had said as he looked over at Ori’s sleeping form like a kicked puppy. “How could he ever feel the same?”

You had rolled your eyes then and you rolled them again now. Will often told you that one of these days you were going to roll your eyes so far back into your head they’d get stuck. He hadn’t particularly enjoyed it when you strongly insinuated that it would be his fault.

You were so distracted by your brother and Ori, you didn’t notice the nervous breakdown Kili was having right next to you. He was staring into the fire with some intensity while silently moving his lips to the thoughts in his head. His hand was deep in his pocket, worrying a courting bead.

Fili (who no one was paying attention to unlike you, Kili, Will, and Ori, who had the entire company's attention split between the four of you, with varying amounts of exasperation) was watching Kili with much the same expression you were watching Will with. After a moment he leaned over to his brother and whispered in his ear so that only he could hear.

“Go ask, you know what the reply will be. I’m growing sick of watching you two dance around each other and if you don’t ask soon, I'll ask for you.”

Kili turned to Fili with wide, concerned eyes.

“You wouldn’t.”

“Want to bet?”

Kili really didn’t.

Kili turned to you and gently placed his hand on your arm, pulling you out of your (by this point slightly murderous) thoughts.

“Take a walk with me?”

You smiled brightly at Kili.

“Alright”

Kili leads you to a stream the company had stopped near earlier in the day. He was silent the whole way and while silence between the two of you was usually comfortable, you couldn’t help but notice how nervous he seemed.

“Everything all right?”

He smiled.

“Of course Y/n!”

He still seemed nervous but you figured he would tell you when he was ready. You soon came to the small stream and sat down on a fallen log beside it.

Kili took a deep breath and turned to you.

“Y/N, for months I have been quite taken with you.”

The boldness of Kili’s words and how suddenly he said them took you by surprise. Kili, upon seeing your expression, hastily tried to amend his words.

“What I meant to say, erm, is that I’ve fallen in lo-” Kili coughed “I mean, I would like— Mahal Damn it give me a moment.”

Much to your giddy amusement, the young prince stopped his ramblings and took a breath, gathering himself before he spoke again. His voice was level, though his hands still fidgeted and his eyes were downcast.

“(Y/N), your mind and your beauty have enraptured me. I’ve never met your equal in wit and kindness, not in all the years I’ve been on Middle Earth. I ask for your hand in courtship, if it would please you, for it would surely please me.”

The prince glanced up at you and saw the tears in your eyes. His own widened and he began to pull away as he backtracked.

“However, if you were to refuse me, I would understand… I shouldn’t have assumed you felt the same… I mean, I’m so sorry-“ you interrupted the prince's ramblings by throwing your arms around his neck.

“Kili I would love to court you!”

Kili pulled back just enough to smile at you.

“So you’ll let me braid your hair?”

“Of course! Isn’t that pretty much the same thing as asking me to court you?”

Kili nodded.

“Then I’ve already said yes, you silly dwarf! …. Though my brother might be a bit upset.”

Kili frowned and remained silent for a moment before he asked

“Why? I thought he liked me.”

“No, no he does! It’s just, well, you were supposed to ask him first.”

Kili looked at you for a moment in obvious confusion.

“Kili? Are you alright?”

That seemed to break Kili out of his thoughts and he gained a look of determination. He quickly got up and began striding back towards camp.

You sat on the log for a moment looking after him in disbelief before getting up and jogging after him. You caught up to him and moved in front of him to block his path.

“Kili, Kili stop. Where are you going?” You asked him breathlessly.

“I’m going to ask your brother,” Kili said, clearly confused.

“We can do that later, my love.”

Kili took your hands in his and looked up at you.

“If it’s an important human tradition then I would honor it. Your culture and customs are just as important as my own.”

You wanted to argue further, but he was being so sweet and thoughtful you only sighed. You could also tell this was something he was going to be stubborn about.

“Alright.”

You hadn’t even finished speaking before he resumed dragging you back to camp.

You got back to camp and Fili turned to you with a big smile, which was quickly replaced with a frown at his brother’s intense expression.

Kili quickly walked up to Will and got down on one knee in front of him. Will looked over Kili’s shoulder at you and you shrugged. He turned back to Kili when he started speaking.

“Will, would you do me the honor of courting me?”

Will blinked and your jaw dropped. Silence fell over the camp. Everyone looked either at Kili or each other in bewilderment.

Ori stood up beside Will and glared at Kili so intensely that he’d have died on the spot if looks could kill.

“You knew I was going to ask him to court me! How could you?!”

Your brother (who had been looking at Kili like he’d grown a second head) turned to Ori quickly.

“Wait what?”

“Don’t ask me, it’s some sort of human custom!” Kili said.

You, Will, and Ori all began talking at once.

“Why would you - talking about - FIGHT YOU FOR HIM”

Will turned to Ori with an “Again, what?!”

Kili turned back to you with a fearful and very confused face.

“You said I had to ask him first.”

You blinked at him for a moment then burst out laughing so loudly Oin fell off his log.

The rest of the company stared at you in shocked silence for a moment before Will asked you (or maybe just the world at large) a question.

“What’s going on?”

Unfortunately, you were laughing too hard to reply and poor Kili didn’t understand any better than the rest of them.

Dwalin looked at Ori (who had turned a brilliant shade of red) and then moved to stand between Ori and Kili.

“Kili I think you’d better explain what happened when you and y/n were in the woods before Ori bursts a blood vessel,” He said

By now your face was starting to hurt. Kili looked at you in worry before he began.

“When I proposed Y/n said,” Kili paused here and turned his eyes to the sky as he tried to remember the exact wording “Of course, but you have to ask my brother first.”

Will started laughing too, and by this time you were lying on the ground near passing out from lack of oxygen.

Bilbo came to Kili’s rescue as most of the company was doubled over laughing now, having realized what you meant.

“I think what y/n meant was that you have to ask Will for permission to court. Not that you have to ask him to court you.”

You vaguely nodded as you continued to wheeze on the ground.

Eventually, you stopped laughing long enough to get off of the ground and you wiped your eyes. Kili gave you a slightly betrayed look as Fili used your shoulder for support to keep himself from falling over.

Will had managed to pull himself together long before you, so he was only chuckling when he said “Kili, I give you full permission to court y/n.”

He got far more serious as he turned to Ori who was now calm and growing shyer by the second.

“And I would love to court you, Ori.”

Ori smiled and nodded and they went off to the edge of camp to braid each other’s hair.

You noticed Nori was having to nearly physically restrain Dori from storming over to them.

You turned to a bright red Kili. “Aren’t you supposed to be braiding my hair?”

Kili took your hand and slowly began leading you to the edge of camp.

He sat behind you and while you expected to feel his hands in your hair, you didn’t.

“Kili?” You asked.

When he took a moment to respond you turned around to look at him. He was looking at your hair with a strange mixture of longing and sadness.

You sighed.

“Kili, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to laugh, I-“

“Are you sure you want to court me?” He cut you off “I would understand if you didn’t, I mean I pretty much ruined the whole thing.”

“Kili” you whispered as you put your hand on his cheek.

“There is no one I’d rather be with,” you said.

“And besides, just think what a wonderful story this will make,” you said with a smile “plus if you hadn’t, Will and Ori might not have ever gotten together.”

He barked out a laugh.

“Those are very good points, ghivashel.”

“I know, I’m the one who made them.”

Kili pulled you in for a soft kiss. It quickly got more heated and your whole body was screaming for you to climb into his lap. Sudden whooping (from the company members) and exaggerated gagging (from Will and Fili) reminded you that you had an audience.

You lightly slapped Kili’s knee and said “get to braiding” as you turned back around.

He did and you reveled in the feeling of his fingers twisting in your hair.

“Now, tell me what ‘ghivashel’ means.”

-

-

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