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aihoshiino · 3 months

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chapter 154 thoughts

Chapters Since The 143 Kiss Happened And Went Entirely Unacknowledged And Unaddressed Count: 11

Aqua Hoshigan Status: (Still) white

man

This is one of those chapters where, technically speaking, I should probably be tearing it to bits (AND I DEFINITELY WILL) - it represents a pretty substantial break in or retcon to the series continuity as it's been presented to us thus far and the actions of certain characters in the lead up to this event don't quite make sense if they've had access to some of the information that's seemingly been in their hands for a while but… would you guys forgive me if I said I didn't really care LOL. As I've said before, I'm the sort of reader who can excuse a lot of raw Plot Bullshit so long as I feel like the hearts of the characters are intact and for all its fumbles, this is a chapter I think is unerringly dedicated to the hearts of its characters. I've made no secret of the fact that Ai is and always has been my main avenue of investment in Oshi no Ko as a series and in this chapter, we uncover the final secret in her heart in particular after having the entire series thus far dedicated to laying it bare to us.

We pick up exactly where we left off last chapter with the reveal that the HKAI breakup was indeed founded on Ai's pregnancy, as a lot of us had predicted.

This, uh, does not quite line up with previous events!

From what we'd previously been told, in terms of placement in the timeline, the death of Airi and her husband happened after the twins were born and sometime in the leadup to the Dome concert, which would put it in the ballpark of Ai's 18th to 20th birthday depending on how long it was in the works for. But based on how this flashback section is structured, it seems to place their deaths before Ai even knew she was pregnant, let alone giving birth. If it was just clashing with 15YL's retelling then I could dismiss that as an element of the movie's fictionalization that we've seen and Kamiki alludes to but this also clashes with where this event was placed temporally by Ichigo, when remembering a real life event. So… What gives!!!!

Like, at the end of the day, the exact placement of Uehara's death only matters inasmuch as it needs to be before Ai gets her new apartment, since the point Ichigo is really making is that Aqua is pinning his hopes on a dead man who was dead before he could have ever contributed to Ai's murder. But placing it that far back in the timeline - before the twins were even born! - just makes Aqua's willful ignorance in relation to it come off as a lot sillier and more difficult to swallow than if it happened closer to Ai's actual date of death.

I'm also a little disappointed that we really quickly breeze past Ai revealing she's pregnant - it's not the point of the scene overall and it would be weird to go really deep into her POV in the middle of a Kamiki flashback but one of my big issues with the Movie Arc was that it ripped past anything and everything to do with Ai's pregnancy, including how she herself felt about being pregnant. Like I said in my 145 review, skipping over the parts of it we've seen makes sense but I think there's still a bunch of really fascinating potential in exploring how Ai felt when she realized she was pregnant - how did she hide it for long enough that she was almost halfway through her pregnancy and getting fucking enormous before her first checkup? How did Ichigo and Miyako react when they first got the news? There's so much juicy character and relationship work you could mine out of that but the story fails to do so. We sort of get a crumb of this in the DVD but her feelings there are all centered on the pregnancy in relation to Hikaru and even then she breezes past it so fast it's clearly not meant to be the focus of any of what she's saying and idk. For a character whose entire hook is her struggles with motherhood, familial love and all the rest of it, that's a little disappointing.

THAT SAID!!! All that makes me sound like I didn't like what went on with Ai this chapter but I actually loved it. It's so painfully in line with everything we've been told and shown about her thus far in the manga and in this chapter, we see all her strengths, weaknesses and human contradictions laid bare in a way I find incredibly rewarding and compelling.

The HKAI breakup especially is just soooooo deliciously cringe inducing. It's an echo of the argument with Nino that 15YL portrays, where Ai's good intentions, avoidant tendencies and absolute absence of tact all snowball and end up ruining one of her most important relationships. Like… I can't believe I'm about to say this about a conversation in which Ai is one of the people talking, but she really is the reasonable one here! She's right to identify that their relationship is not working, that adding babies and marriage to the mix will only make things worse - her intentions, as they always are, are good and she's making her decisions with Kamiki in mind… her delivery is just absolutely dogshit!!! GIRL, PLEASE, YOUR WORDS!!!! USE YOUR WORDS!!!!!

For all my issues with Akasaka's writing lately, I think he portrays these kinds of two sided failures of communication so well, where you can see exactly where both characters are coming from and why they are failing to get their feelings across to each other. From an outsider's POV it's clear as day that Ai views herself and her children as the burden, one she doesn't want to put on Kamiki for the sake of a girl who doesn't even know if she can love him… but is it any wonder why Kamiki took it the way he did and why his guts were so utterly wrenched out as a result?

Kamiki's attempted proposal and Ai's immediate rejection of it are really interesting with the context of 45510 in particular. Extrapolating from her talk of marriage there, she brushed him off so quickly because she simply didn't believe he was serious… and yeah, he's pretty clearly not fully cognizant of the weight of what he's trying to propose, never mind that he's meeting "let's break up" with "LET'S GET MARRIED" lol.

Also interesting to extrapolate from both 45510 and other material surrounding Ai is that, at that point in her life, she simply didn't understand what the point of marriage was. On top of her being Literally Sixteen And A Child right now, Ai is said to have come from a deeply dysfunctional home where her mother engaged in a number of equally dysfunctional relationships, at least one of whom was with a man who was creeping on Ai even as he was working up to marry her mom. It's no wonder she doesn't really take the idea of marriage seriously, but it still hurts so see her reject Kamiki so bluntly - even more bluntly in the Japanese text somehow, simply chirping 無理! (Muri!) in response, i.e, not just "no way" but telling Kamiki to his face it's impossible.

Honestly this whole breakup scene is so darkly hilarious just in terms of how bad Ai is completely beefing it. Congrats babygirl that's the worst anyone's ever done it!!!

And we finally get the "I can't love you" drop after just shy of 25 chapters of buildup…….. And honestly, it feels a little hollow.

I talked about this a little before so forgive me for repeating myself but that line - or rather, Aqua and Ruby's implied misunderstanding of it - from Ai to Hikaru was given a huge amount of weight in the story when it was first introduced. It was implied to be the lynchpin in which everything else about the HKAI romance rested only for the story to go UH WELL ACTUALLY IT'S ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT AI FORGIVES HER KILLER which is like… fine, it just feels very jarring on a reread or when trying to sew together a plot thread like this. It especially feels strange because the emphasis is placed on them not getting it right or at least that Gotanda disagrees with their interpretation, only for the manga to whip back around and not only return this line to its previous heightened importantance but also to largely not line up with what was established about this line and its place in the narrative when it was first introduced. It's just more evidence that Akasaka's plans for the Movie Arc and its resolution changed in some way during serialisation because these inconsistencies are pretty glaring.

Not just that, but like… it's hard to feel impacted by this line when we didn't even see it in the Movie Arc. In general, it's so fucking weird that so much about the main emotional resolutions going on right now revolve around Ruby's performance in the movie when most of the big emotional moments people are reacting to are happening entirely offscreen. This would already be bad even if it wasn't taking place in a manga like OnK with its increasingly frustrating habit of offscreening more and more bits of the story that are extremely important for the characters. Before this chapter I would've said that maybe we'd see some of it after the movie released but given that Kamiki's arc and the revenge play as a whole is pretty clearly wrapping here, what would even be the point of it?

Idk. It's just increasingly obvious (and just as frustrating) to me just how much of the Movie Arc was wasted time and how much of the setup that needed to happen to make what follows really land just… didn't. This chapter's resolution for Ai and Hikaru, both separately and as a couple, is still excellent, but it could have been a lot better if its foundations weren't so meager.

We also finally get concrete proof from the horse's mouth that Kamiki was the one who deliberately leaked Ai's address and……. honestly this is kind of a wet fart too lol. OnK has previously very strongly implied that "Kamiki is Ai's killer" was a red herring or that we should at least be slightly skeptical of Aqua's assertions and conclusions but… nope, he was right all along, I guess?? Alright………………………… I certainly don't believe his insistence that gosh he totes didn't think Ryosuke would go THAT far and I'm still wondering wtf the two of them were doing at the hospital the night the twins were born but like. Honestly at this point, I don't really think it matters and I care much more about emotional resolutions than I do granular plot details - and boy do we get one hell of an emotional resolution.

I haven't shouted her out yet because I was saving it for this section but fuck, man, Mengo's expression work told chapter is killer as usual but this final stretch of pages is just gutwrenching. Ai's gentle, rueful smile on the DVD contrasted with the look of shocked, dawning understanding on Kamiki's….. Jesus Christ.

And at last, we uncover the final secret hidden at the bottom of Ai's heart. The entire manga thus far has been a process of stripping away the viewer's willful ignorance with regards to Ai's humanity but the DVDs had been an oddly ominous mystery box floating around, containing some implied dark secret that would change the entire trajectory of Ai's character as we knew it… but of course, the person who tells us that is Ai herself, a girl who hates herself, thinks of herself as dirty and impure, irresponsible and incapable of love.

So is it really any surprise that her darkest secret, the thing she can only confess with her eyes shining with black stars is simply that she's a fallible human? That she was a lonely young girl, confused and hurt in her own ways and that she hurt someone she dearly cared for and wanted to take it back?

Is it a little convenient that she put all this in the DVD? Yes, absolutely, and I'll be the first to say that the DVDs existing at all are a pretty clear retcon in service of getting info onto Aqua's hands. But it's also perfectly in line with Ai's timid, avoidant methods of reaching out. It parallels both Viewpoint B and 45510 (moreso the latter) where she pours her heart out in words, waiting for others to read and understand her. In 45510 in particular, her leaving the blog post is an extremely clear and strong parallel to the DVD - love letters put into bottles and thrown to the ocean in desperate hope the person they're addressed to might find and understand them.

As Akane says, Ai is torn between secrecy and a desire to have her true self exposed, so she attempts to craft scenarios in which this must happen, even if her avoidance can only allow her to do so with indirect methods. With the blog and moreso the DVDs & their method of delivery, Ai attempts to create situations where the initiation confrontation and disclosure is out of her hands and she has no choice but to tell the truth.

Ai's entire speech here is just heartbreaking. If the start of the chapter didn't make it explicit enough, we see her here put her good intentions into words to better understand how they were misinterpreted.

This adds SUCH a fascinating additional layer to her death that has me gnashing my fucking teeth. One of the things I've talked about a lot in my Ai meta is that Ryosuke is essentially an agent or even an embodiment of the entertainment industry and the way it has exploited her - the misogyny, entitlement, purity culture and abuse that ruled her life went on to end it. With this additional detail, though, Ryosuke becomes an agent not just of the things that plagued Ai of B-Komachi, but Ai as a human, too. All her life, Ai is willfully misunderstood and mischaracterized by the people around her, assigned narratives and roles without her consent and punished for both living up to and failing to live up to them. Ai's death is the end result of a lifelong cascade of failure on the part of every system and individual that has had the opportunity and responsibility to care for her - and, as Aqua throws in his father's face, that includes Hikaru.

Hikaru's supposed understanding of Ai is not one based in empathy or love but projection and possessiveness - understanding in this context is ownership, exclusivity and frankly, arrogance. A claim to a piece of Ai that no one else knows. But as Aqua forces him to realize… Hikaru never understood Ai, even as she did her best to make herself understood. For all his arrogance of understanding Ai and the nature of their relationship, Kamiki is ultimately just the same as every other person who idolized and objectified her then discarded her when the image they'd created in their mind didn't match reality. Ai wasn't his pure and perfect soulbonded saviour - she was a lonely, broken kid like him, still struggling to understand love after a lifetime spent starved of it.

Once, Kamiki begged Ai to save him. And here, the bitter truth is laid out for all of us: the salvation Kamiki had wished for was waiting for him, reaching out with open arms and he not only desecrated it but irrevocably destroyed any path back towards it. In killing Ai, Hikaru Kamiki killed himself.

The imagery of this moment is so fucking gorgeous. The visual of Kamiki and Ai reaching out to each other, in mutual understanding at last but separated by time and death… the "what if" happy Hoshino family… Ai's words being framed as a 'love letter' that transcended time to reach Kamiki and Aqua's eyes blazing with white as tears pour down his face… Jesus fucking Christ Mengo I'm already dead!!!!!

Like I said up top, I make zero secret of the fact that I am primarily invested in Ai above everything else in the manga and the way her importance has been seemingly downplayed since the late 130s mark chapter wise has really bugged me. As such, this chapter was INSANELY cathartic for me. Not only do we get a really beautiful cap to Ai's post death arc (hopefully finally killing those dumbfuck Secretly Evil Ai theories for good) but it's done in a way that once again recenters her love and her wishes as the heart of everything. Even Aqua's revenge play is completely redefined in this context - no longer the childish, selfish and self destructive lashing out we've seen before but as a quest to both honor Ai and to punish the person arrogantly assuming ownership of her heart even as he so catastrophically misunderstands her.

This is a really fantastic end to Aqua's arc too… on paper, that is. I know for a fact that a certain genre of OnK readers are going to bitch and moan that Aqua didn't run his dad over with a 2003 Honda Civic but I really can't imagine Aqua's revenge quest going any other way unless OnK was intended to be a pure tragedy. Over and over, we have seen that Aqua's revenge is at odds with not just his happiness but with Ai's wish for him to live a full life with a bright future. It is self destructive, hurtful to the people around him and antithetical to any of them moving on and reclaiming what their futures. With the emphasis the story places on moving towards a happy future, in selfishly reclaiming your happiness even in the face of systems that seek to crush you and on honouring Ai's wishes and legacy, it would be flatly thematically incoherent for Aqua to choose killing.

The issue is not with this as Aqua's end point but with the path we've taken to get here. As was the issue with Ruby during the Movie Arc, we don't actually see any of the internal work that happened in service of this arc, just the big emotional end points of offscreen development. But it stings especially bad with Aqua when such a huge chunk of the last few arcs locked us out of his head, sharply contrasting the start of the story that lived and breathed his interiority - AND when this is more or less the capstone to his series long struggle to choose love or revenge. It's not that I dislike this as an emotional payoff for Aqua's revenge - this is more or less beat for beat what I'd expected - but that it lacks proper support from the rest of the story. In general, this chapter falls flatter than it should because all this heightened, dramatic emotion rests on arcs and setup that simply have not been shown to the reader, save for Ai.

Speaking of Ai, the info in the DVD here potentially represents a pretty major break in the continuity of Aqua's behaviour based on when we're told he had access to it but I'm willing to bite my tongue and see if that gets filled in, if only because this chapter review is already so fucking long. Let's just say that I Noticed and I sure hope Aka or his editors did too.

And finally… Oh, hey there, Ruby! Aren't you an interesting little snarl to this chapter. Or maybe "snarl" isn't quite right, but her presence here is potentially interesting either way. I'm not quite sure how to read both her expression and her presence - the expression on her face looks VERY displeased and it looks to me like she's outside the room, so is she maybe eavesdropping and not happy with what she hears? Or is she in on Aqua's talk with Kamiki here and just struggling with her emotions with regards to it all? I'm quiety hoping it's the latter, because it would confirm that Ruby DID recognize her dad in 147 and Akasaka wasn't expecting me to believe he was hitting her with the stupid stick quite that hard lol.

In either case, I'm actually excited to see what Ruby takes away from this. In the ways that AQRB has echoed the HKAI dynamic, Ruby has always been in Kamiki's shoes - the one desperate to be saved, clinging to her oshi and relying on him as her sole bastion of light in the world. So what will she think now after being faced with the logical endpoint of this wished-for codependence? When she sees how destructive and self destructive it can potentially be? Just as she saw Ai reflected in herself, will Ruby see her father in her own reflection - and if so, what will she do about it?

Break next week! So we'll be sitting pretty for two weeks to find out. Not that I actually mind this time because with a chapter like this on top of season 2 of the anime coming back today, a week without a break might have actually killed me… please, akamengo, i'm just a little guy!!!!

#oshi no ko #oshi no posting #chapter reviews #onk spoilers #ai hoshino #hikaru kamiki #kamiai #hikaai

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officialdaydreamer00 · 17 days

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House fire

ROLLO FLAMME — in which one can predict a student exchange program might go south real quick

COLLAB WORK with @unfictinalnightmare for [The chimes of comfort]

CONTENT — takes place after glorious masquerade, our yuusonas (hillary and irene) are yuu, silly shenanigans with hillary and irene, encounter with 3/4 diasomnia oh no D: , little crumbs of mallerene

A/N — lol i have returned for a bit :)

Do reblog or comment if you enjoy my work! ^-^

TAGGINGS — @cloudcountry @identity-theft-101 @xen-blank @esmerulia-chantelle @dove-da-birb @cookiesandbiscuits @vioisgoinginsane @siren-serenity @loser-jpg @axvwriter @edith-is-a-cat @le-monchou @thehollowwriter @taruruchi @cyanide-latte @aqua-beam + others :3

Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 4: Encounter with Diasomnia || Chapter 5 || Chapter 6

After a while of shopping, the group of three humans and one monster returned to Night Raven College.

The students parted ways for the Prefects, but curious eyes followed Rollo with every step he took. Some looked confused, others sent him unpleasant stares. He could tune them out, no problem.

As they arrived back to Ramshackle dorm, however, a situation they didn't expected happened.

"Irene, Morutel, and... Flamme?"

"YOU AGAIN!? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!"

Malleus came to visit the dorm on a whim, as usual. But this time, he had Silver and Sebek with him.

Such a sudden encounter with both parties who didn't like each other to begin with would not end well. And of course, it proceeded to turn into an even bigger mess, much to the Prefect duo's dismay.

Sebek yelled out, making everyone in the vicintiy flinch in surprise.

Grim found his hands flew up to cover his ears from the louder than normal yell. Silver quickly stood in front of Malleus, ready to protect him from Rollo. Said perpetrator of this commotion was watching with a blank stare, silently asking the Righteous Judge why he must curse him with an encounter with Draconia the moment he stepped a foot into NRC.

What a cruel joke fate had set him up with.

"Wait- Sebek, no!"

"You are a guest to our school, you should have been treated as such. My apologies for Sebek's rudeness, Flamme." Malleus gave Rollo a simple smile, though it made the hairs on the back of the silverette's neck stand up.

Hillary was quick to stop Sebek, who was roughly grabbing Rollo by the collar of his shirt, and tried to separate them. Meawhile, Irene, as calm as she could manage, explained what had happened to Malleus and Silver.

Understanding the situation, Malleus only then told Sebek to let go of Rollo. If a fight broke out without being stopped, their two Prefects would rain hell on the student body.

No one wanted to be put through their strange spells and unorthodox potions, never again.

"It's... alright, Draconia. I'm fully aware of how dedicated your guards are to you. I just didn't expect them to be so... hasty."

Rollo knew for sure, that smile was anything but sunshine and rainbows. That and the hostile auras exuding from his two knights. However, Rollo couldn't just leave it at that and accept such defeat.

Beside magic, the thing he couldn't stand the most in this world was Night Raven students.

...

"Alright, that's it...!"

Meanwhile, Hillary had been watching the whole thing like it was her favourite soap opera. Only when Rollo looked as if he would pass out anytime soon from the verbal assault, did she finally went to stop the black-haired girl. She pushed Irene over to Malleus, waiting for her to cool off.

At that moment, Irene felt as if something snapped in her. As everyone were stunned from her sudden burst of anger, she threw at Rollo an astounding myriad of harsh words that she wouldn't normally use.

The more she looked at the silverette, the more pissed she was. From their previous trip to Fleur City until now, Irene rant out all her pent up anger on Rollo.

———————————————————

"That was quite an entertaining sight, Child of Man."

After Irene calmed herself down, she received a round of laughter from Malleus. He didn't expect his Child of Man would have such moments. A bit mean-spirited, sure, but that didn't mean she was any less endearing to him.

"I- Please stop talking, Tsunotarou!!!"

Irene exclaimed in embarrassment, trying in vain to cover her reddened face. Earlier, she was so pissed, she didn't notice her surroundings, and only when Hillary pushed her away did she remember what she did. That was so embarrassing... Why didn't that witch Hillary stop her earlier!?

#irene's writings ♡#twst #twisted wonderland #twst fic #rollo flamme #twst rollo #malleus draconia #twst malleus #sebek zigvolt #twst sebek #twst silver #twst oc #twst ocs #tech child <3 #collab ocs #fic collab #the chimes of comfort

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bloomingdarkgarden · 4 months

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My unabridged and uninvited Bridgerton season 3 thoughts live as i binge-watched until midnight last night:

fuck this show is euphoric escapism soap opera and idk what whimsical crack they put in it but it always manages to make my heartrate go insane. My expectations were low, maybe because ive been starved for any tiny crumb of this whimsy idk but i feel atrociously fed so here we go:

colin u are acting like an instagram influencer and we all see thru u bye.

Nicola is the most stunning person on television 50 shades of aqua move over boys I'm first in line for her dance card.

I would sell my soul to satan to have a cigarette with Lady Danbury in her afterhours tea room.

ngl the resurgence of the season 1 orchestrals is BEAUTIFUL and hitting harder than the new covers.

cressida's hair needs a dedicated gallery space and im completely here for her humanization she is a ruthless sad hoe and i understand. creloise good morning.

pen and francesca bonding over being introverts>>>>

pen is the people's princess for real, bookish as hell and socially awkward until she has 3 glasses of wine and then she's real as fuck. mood.

OH MY GOD THE KISS THE NIGHT GARDEN THE SHEER STARVATION his hand on her cheek and he's looking at her like he just touched god fucking hell i had to rewind and watch three times.

Pen trying to impress Debling "I LOVE BIRDS' no she did not I spit out my wine. yes penelope yes. don't let anyone tell u you don't have game honey.

omg balloon drama lol what is this shit peak bridgerton nonsense.

benedict has the personality of a rug on someone's back patio, polite and unnecessary. the reason why his scenes are so offputting every season is because he has been depicted as Goofy from A Goofy Movie no i have not read the books but boy they are gonna have to pay me money to digest him as a love interest i swear to god.

ugh penelope is the most relatable female lead in this entire series i am rooting for her SO hard.

thank fuck lady featherington is willing to discuss penetration with her daughters they now stand a fraction of a chance of surviving the world. lady f for president.

i found francesca's placidity / passitivity about the next 50 years of her life v frustrating at first but she grew on me immensely and am looking forward to more of her screentime.

debling has kind eyes and i will be sad if he's truly jilted... bravo netflix for once again making me care about the beta characters.

this danbury man flirting with lady bridgerton hello sire you are gallant as hell, wake up lady b.

colin's entire world being ruined for penelope is actual nirvana.

THE CARRIAGE SCENE THE CARRIAGE SCENE I WILL NEVER STOP LOVING THEM I WILL NEVER STOP I LOVE THEM IM INSANE ILL NEVER STOP holy shit. colin asking if the carriage can just keep going and pen laughing because that's a gd ridiculous thing to say is peak friends to lovers i felt their friendship in that moment and im aching with it ugh they are besties with hormones GOD i will never. stop. loving. them idc idc idc.

can't wait to watch 75 more times goodnight.

#bridgerton #bridgerton season 3 #penelope featherington #colin bridgerton #unabridged ramble #polin

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the-real-treasure · 2 months

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Wish Wish! One Shot #1

A Picture Says A Thousand Words.

Main Masterlist: Here

Drabble Masterlist: Here

Read on AO3: Here

Zeff discovers something about one of the kids that he had been stranded with after they all get off the rock.

(One-shot #1) [Baratie Age 8] Zeff's POV Trigger Warnings: Mention of starvation, residual trauma from starvation, issues with eating, possible eating disorder Word Count: 1493

"What letter is that?"

Zeff looked up from the delivery slip that had just landed in front of him. The Baratie was still under construction and bills were coming in left right and centre for every little thing. He didn't much care, the gold he had kept, the sack of treasure that he had feigned as food, was more than enough to pay for all of it, as well as get those kids some new clothes that actually fit and shit while things were still being worked on. They had all lost a lot of weight over those eighty-five days, and while he and the little eggplant were slowly but surely returning to a healthy standard, he worried a lot about the other one.

The vicious freak of a thing was little more than a slip of flesh, any and all clothes hanging loose and limp over bone and sinew that he couldn't get coated in fat no matter what he feed them. Even now, a bit under a month off the rock, they still refused to eat until both he and Sanji had started their plates. They were like a feral kitten, screaming and yowling and scratching those first few days on board the ship that rescued them, stalking the little blonde boy and almost force feeding him if he did so much as offer them a crumb of bread before he began, their ringed eyes of gold and aqua swirling with unrestrained panic every time.

He breathed out a sigh. There wasn't much to be done about that but keep up the food. One of these days the kid would realise the rest of them wouldn't die if they took a bite whenever they were hungry. Instead of continuing to worry, he instead stood up from the desk and peeked his head around the corner.

Where he had set up camp in the still to be fully fitted kitchen, the two kids had made themselves at home in what will be the dining hall, in the shadow of the twin staircases that hug the opposite wall and curve with it. He could see them squatting next to the new sign, the light filled letters dull for now until they get hung outside. They really weren't meant to have arrived for another month or two, but the guys knew Zeff by name and hurried the job along to get themselves away from the, still notorious, pirate. Y/n was staring at the first one in extreme consternation.

"...B...?"

"Yeah, told you you'd get it!" Sanji gave their joined hands a shake, pointing to the second one that was propped up against the wall, the large capital 'R' wrapped in plastic but the shape still visible. "Next one!"

"What are you two doing ever there?" He watched as the two of you leapt away from each other like you were being burnt, your h/c haired figure, long messy mop pulled into a ponytail that fell down their back before looping back up to be held in place by the same tie, spinning on him with a glare as you leaped between him and Sanji, the little eggplant snarling at him as well.

"Mind your own business, you nasty old pile of fish food!" The wee boy shouted from behind you, and he squinted down at the pair of you, hobble extra pronounced due to his still new peg leg as he walked out to meet yous.

"Little eggplant, honestly, just swear like a normal person."

"Least I don't use so much oregano I could kill a person." He snarked and Zeff presses his eyes and mouth closed and blows a sigh out his nose. He is a scared little boy trying to act brave, not a disrespectful crewmember. He doesn't need hit. Opening his eyes again, he finds your eyes burning into his skull, searching his eyes for an intention to harm. You wouldn't find it.

"I'm gonna ask again." You drop your eyes away from his, "What are you doing out here?"

"I said, mind-!"

"-Practicing."

"Eh?" Their eyes dart from his feet to theirs, scuffing the toe of their shiny new boots on the tiles floor.

"I was... practicing my letters." His eyes flick over to Sanji, the boy already glaring heatedly at him, hand clasped in theirs squeezing so tightly that their claw like nails dug into his skin.

"You haven't been able to read this whole time." Their shoulders scrunched up to their ears, head ducked down further and Sanji pulled them into him. "Fffffff-" The kid doesn't swear, Zeff, let's keep it like that. "-Fflip sake, could'a told me. Would've got you books or something." Your eyes snap up to him, and even Sanji glare fades to confusion.

"...What?" He rests his curled fists on his waist as he looked down at the pair.

"You think I would want you running about taking orders and counting stock not knowing how to read or spell? Thought you were smarter than this, come on." He turns back to the kitchen, not knowing if you would both follow, but there was no use standing and letting you struggle, just the pair of you.

"To do what?" He can hear your boots on the tile behind him and can picture you dragging a stumbling Sanji behind you.

"To learn, you little donkey. I don't have any books but I have notes and stock lists so we can start with actual words instead of fumbling with random letters."

He pushes open the doors to the kitchen and lets the pair of you pass, hands still grasping each other, with you leading the boy into the kitchen, the few counters already installed littered with papers.

"Come over here, you can show me what you can make out so far. That'll let me know what we're working with."

"What about me?" The blonde boy chirped up beside you, still not parting your intwined hands.

"Either help, or stay out of the way. It's not hard little eggplant." As you pulled a small stool up to the counter to sit alongside his chair, Sanji inserted himself between them, inspecting the papers. Zeff tugged off his overcoat, draping it over the arm as he settled into the chair and handed you a small order slip over Sanji's head. "Start with that, read it out loud and we'll go from there. I'll see about getting a couple of books ordered for yous to practise with properly. These'll have to work for now."

Your voice, which had spent the evening stuttering and stumbling over the names of different companies and construction costs, had fallen silent. Zeff was finishing up filling a few more receipts in the dying light cascading through the kitchen when he looked over to the pair of you.

Sanji's head was flat on the table, his grey-blue eyes, normally covered by the long floppy fringe, were shut and he could make out the curl on his other eyebrow with the slant of the hair. His bones and new wooden peg leg creaked as he stood, stiff from sitting for so long. Pulling the fabric at his arm up with him, he opened it and settled the warm fabric over his charge's shoulders before his eyes met yours, aqua and gold light illuminating the scene as you peered at him. In the growing darkness that crept its fingers up the walls of the room, the sight in front of him was spooky.

It reminded him of being on that rock, the light from your eyes piercing the cloying darkness at him over the ridge of rock separating you all. Now, instead of a barren expanse of rock creating distance between your eyes and his, the only thing that stood between you was a sleeping boy that had hollowed a space out of Zeff's heart for himself and completely encompassed yours.

"He knew I was embarrassed." Your voice was a whisper, not wanting to break the quiet that had fallen over the room. "The ones on the Orbit made fun of me for not reading. I can count fine, but letters and words are... hard."

"I get that." His voice is as hushed as yours, "We'll work on it. The three of us, we look after each other from now on, yeah?"

"Until we go to find the All Blue?" A smile quirked Zeff's face at your misty glowing eyes and whispers of the shared dream.

"Nah. I'll still be keeping an eye on yous even when you head out." He reached over you and ruffled your carefully tied up hair and you whacked his hand with more ferocity than he expected. "For now we'll just worry about getting your reading up to scratch." He smiled as your nose rolled up, and you followed him as he lifted Sanji into his arms and moved towards the stairs to your little loft rooms.

"You can work on chasing dreams later."

#wish wish!#one piece #one piece oc #one piece original character #aqua oc #one piece sanji #one piece zeff #sanji x reader #sanji x oc #cross posted on ao3 #one shot #one piece oneshots

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aloysiavirgata · 1 year

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Scully comes out to Mulder as bisexual he responds by also coming out as bisexual

They’re kicked back in Adirondacks by the fire circle, the logs popping and sparking when the flames lick dried sap. The air is just crisp enough to make the heat cozy. Scully brought home cider donuts from the farm stand along her commute, which they wash down with a pitcher of sangria. A cinnamon-sugar crust coats her lips.

It’s been two minutes since he asked her and she hasn’t answered.

“So?” he prods, nudging her foot with his. “It’s been long enough all the sin’s gone out of it, Dana Katherine. Fess up, did you experiment some in college? I’ll absolve you if you did.”

He puts the lewdest possible edge on “experiment” so that she can’t in good faith make a quip about organic chemistry or the effects of acetylcholine on Rana pipiens.

Scully flops her head back against the heavy wooden chair; who cares at this point? The meanest nuns are dead. “Yeah,” she says. “I did.”

She turns to him for a reaction

His eyebrows are up, but he looks genuinely interested rather than smirking. “Oh? Do tell.”

She stares up at the rising column of smoke, tracks it to Polaris. Tracks it decades back. “This girl, Elizabeth. Roommate’s boyfriend’s sister. We…um. We all went out to a bar one night while she was visiting.”

Scully leans into the memory. Calgon and ski sweaters and Aqua Net. Layered bangs, Jordache jeans. Liz’s rum and Coke.

Liz’s hazel eyes, Liz’s blue mascara.

“Anyway. We all had a lot to drink and Claire - that was my roommate - Claire and Elizabeth’s brother were making out in his Cutlass Ciera.”

Liz’s mouth like a taut August plum, the taste of her frosted Revlon lips…

“There was this couch in the back of the bar, some coffee tables, you know the feeling. Anyway, Liz pulled me over. We’d been dancing some, Fleetwood Mac I think, and she kissed me. I was shocked, good Catholic girl that I was. But I was three shots in, and it was college, you know? We settled on the couch, kind of drunk I guess….”

She swallows hard, looks at Mulder. “Is this weird? It seems kind of weird.”

He shakes his head, eyes bright in the flames. “Go on.”

“We were kissing, mostly. She touched my breasts through my shirt, slipped her hands down my jeans but not my underwear. It was pretty innocent, I don’t know. I didn’t see her again after that but it definitely changed my perspective some. I began noticing if I found a woman attractive. Got at least a bit more comfortable with the idea, anyway. Stopped telling myself I just liked her hair or her outfit.”

She hears his breathing thicken. Just a little, but it’s there.

“And never after?” he asks.

Scully wonders what else he isn’t asking her. Wonders what it must be like to be young now. She shakes her head, takes a pull of sangria. Chews a chunk of macerated pineapple.

“No,” she says. “I came close a couple of times, but no.”

She wishes she had a cigarette or a joint. Something to do with her hands and her mouth even after so many years. And even after so many years she doesn’t tell him about what she thought of Esther Nairn, about whether she wanted to kill Diana or be Diana or fuck Diana.

They watch the fire for a time. Hear it crackle, gaze into a vast and endless sky. There are old gods there, older than hers. She knows that now. She embraces it.

“What about you?” Scully asks. “All those posh Eton boys at Oxford, surely one struck your fancy.”

She doesn’t really expect anything of it, but she asks to make him confirm or deny. To deflect. It’s how she’s been trained. And she’s endlessly intrigued by his formative years, her well-bred, prep-school lover. They’d practically invented sodomy, hadn’t they?

Mulder makes a soft, throaty noise. Grabs a donut and takes a huge bite.

She turns to him. “Oh my god,” she says. “Did you sleep with Alex Krycek?” Where had THAT come from?

He coughs donut crumbs everywhere. “Scully!”

She clamps on to it. “Did you?”

His turn for the sangria now, blushing. Blushing! Fox Mulder, did you really? she thinks, oddly turned on.

Mulder clears his throat. “He kissed me, but no. He kissed me twice, actually. But no, I didn’t…” he trails off, shaking his head.

“Did you like it?” she asks, her voice sex and sandpaper. Arousing herself further, Jesus.

“Yes,” he says. Holds her stare. Runs his tongue over the lips she’s kissed so many times. That Alex Krycek and Diana Fowley had kissed. The sting is gone, only the fascination left.

All the sin’s gone out of it, he’d said. Yes, it had. Over fifty, of course it had.

“But it wasn’t your first time.” A little breathless, that.

“No.” Licks his lips again. “You guessed right, Agent Scullly, brava. This guy, at uni…we. We didn’t sleep together, but we’d. You know. Touch.”

Agent Scully.

The father of her child looks unimaginably shy. “Ourselves. Each other.”

She knows about Phoebe, all the details. She knows about the cemetery and the gothic drama and the kind of sex that feels like a revelation instead of a mind game.

He knows about Daniel. She sees the child she was then, has long since forgiven the silly girl.

But this is different and, in her mind, sweet. Two boys, lonely, away from home. She hopes they were comforted. Happy.

“Did you…keep up with him?”

Mulder shakes his head, mouth a little swollen in the primal orange glow. “It only lasted a term before he graduated. Never spoke after that. Phoebe, you know. Other women.”

“Alex.”

He grins at her. “You have to admit he was awfully pretty, especially for a complete piece of shit.”

Scully laughs. “That he was.”

She reaches for his fingers in the dark.

In the light.

#xf fanfic #xfiles fanfic #msr #my fic #prompt #bisexual agents

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kid-kit-kit · 28 days

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Her yet her ye

I bring you Vil x Jade bebe

Vil x Jade come get your crumbs!

Man he really look like a mafioso here....

1) his name is a reference to Hans Christian Andersen the author of the little mermaid

2) he inherited his father sharp teeth

3) He has a sister who is eight years younger than him (she's 9)

4) (headcaonon) mermaids hybrids can fall in three categories each with sub 'species'

-the first is: full mermaids but have difference in colors and attitude from their parent's species

- a weird mix of human and mermaid (think aqua boy from DC) they have scales,gills and sometimes tails but two arms and legs

- full humans but have difference in colors and attitude from their peers

He falls in the first category and his little sister is the second (till I change my mind at least)

5) He spend a lot of time with both his grandpa during his formative years which shaped his personality a lot

Pearl:

She's so pretty, but s

#twisted wonderland #disney twst #twst fanart #twst #twst oc #twst fan kids #vil schoenheit #twisted wonderland vil #pomfiore #vil shoenheit #twst jade #twisted wonderland jade #jade leech #Vil x Jade #octavinelle

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magnetic-dogz · 1 year

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[ ID in alt text ]

Here's full drawings of my Aqua!May and Magma!Brendan since that comic of them got a little popular

#cookie crumbs #pokemon #aqua boss larimar #magma boss garnet #team aqua AU #team magma AU #aqua!may #aqua!brendan #may (pkmn)#brendan (pkmn)#trainer may #trainer brendan #trainer sapphire #trainer ruby #i'm soooo normal about the two of them btw

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lunaapudleonem · 4 months

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Hi love! I would like to ask can you share in your opinion what kind of sexual energy /style in bed would a guy with sun and venus in aquarius, mars in capricorn and cancer moon would have? I want to know for uhh science.... Or just any info plz a bitch is thirsty any info i will take any crumbs pleasee i need to know, couse he is so polite but also there is a freaky spark in his eyes and i wanna know if its all just in my imagination or is it becouse there is something there. And if you gide me what he might be into in terms of kinks or how to pleasure him, i promise i will send the biggest wave of positive energy down your way so you will have good luck for the rest of your life, if you say no i still will send that wave couse your blog is amazing, hope june is wonderful to you, thank you for the help

Hello!! Girl you are so funny with this ask, you made me genuinly laugh genuinely :')

This is what I can tell you from those placements: I'd say he's probably dominant in bed and has a good/high libido - from what I've researched/heard/experienced so far Capricorn Mars is usually very good and observant when it comes to sex. He could be into choking/hair pulling/rough sex. I'd say he's not that interested in role-play, Capricorn Mars can be a bit shy and rigid in this area, but he could be interested in experimenting with toys since he has aqua venus too :) They can be pretty traditional and respectful and won't do anything you dislike and he might wait for a while to be sure that you really like him before he makes the first move. However, after something happens between you too he will keep on taking the initiative, since Capricorn Mars individuals really like to be dominant in bed.

Cancer Moon could make him a bit of a softie, so he might really need to connect to you emotionally before he starts experimenting sexually with you. Cancer Moon men are often obsessed with breasts too - they love admiring them, looking at them, squeezing them, sucking them etc., I'd suggest you wear something more revealing something with a very deep decollete

#zodiac #astrology witch #astro witch #ask #like #follow #astro notes #horoscope #natal chart #astrology #mars #capricorn mars #aquarius venus #cancer moon

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dujour13 · 1 year

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Owlcatober 2. Favorite food

the 4th and final part of The Prodigal Tiefling - also on AO3

(CW food & fluff)

---

It was a pretty sweet plan.

Siavash settled his back against the cool wall of the Citadel balcony and smiled to himself as he played, while a gap in the Worldwound vapors above the west guard tower twinkled with evening stars, winking back at him like they were in on it.

His fingers had found their music again since he’d recovered Woljif alive in the Worldwound. He’d only been half aware what a weight he’d been dragging since the tiefling disappeared, but now that it was lifted song rose out of him as easily as breath again.

Not that all the weight was lifted. The night of the gargoyles he’d lost a lot of people, the flames of hope he’d kindled as Knight-Commander extinguished far too soon, and by his own negligence. Every death was like a punch to the gut, but it was the mental image of the young tiefling’s body shattered against cold Worldwound rocks that ached the most.

They’d started to be friends. Or so he’d hoped.

Of course Woljif ran that night. How could anyone blame him? He ran because he was smart enough to catch the scent of shit on the wind, and to know this new Knight-Commander was in it over his head.

But also smart enough to stay alive out there. Siavash smiled again, shifting to a more cheerful chord.

Since they got back to Drezen the tiefling seemed uncharacteristically subdued, and Siavash hoped a little welcome-back gesture might lift his spirits and let him know he really was forgiven, at least as far as the Knight-Commander was concerned.

At the same time, he had to be careful it wouldn’t be mistaken for flirting, which he definitely wasn’t. Siavash vowed to stick to his self-imposed penance—which he’d already cheated on twice in the two years since Kristov, but that didn’t really count, because neither of those guys was anyone he’d ever really fall for—

Oh.

His fingers faltered on the strings.

Right. That was why he needed to keep this strictly friendly, and yet special; hence the plan.

* * *

“Wait. Are you telling me you lugged those all the way out here into the Worldwound for the last day and a half’s march?” Lann looked at Siavash like he’d sprouted a horn.

“Yeah,” Siavash grinned.

“If you’re complainin’ I’ll eat yours,” Woljif volunteered, snatching a cherry roll from the boxful in the chief’s arms and threatening to swipe another.

“Wouldn’t want the Knight-Commander’s efforts to go to waste.” Lann swatted his hand and helped himself.

“What’sh the occasion?” Seelah asked through a mouthful.

“Our merry band of Kenabres city defenders is back together at last,” Siavash beamed. “Setting out to defeat the forces of the Abyss side-by-side once again. I thought that was worth a little celebration.”

For a moment everyone gaped at him, standing there in the Worldwound wastes in his green striped trousers, purple tunic and aqua scarf, guitar strapped across his back, smiling broadly over a box full of slightly stale cherry rolls, luminous Elysian butterflies fluttering around his head.

“Party time!” yelled Aivu, bounding excitedly across the rocks. “Pass!”

“Ready?”

As she caught the lobbed pastry it exploded into crumbs and sticky cherry filling that she licked from her grinning dragon-lips as she trotted back.

“Very promising,” Daeran mused, nibbling at the cherry roll poised on a lace handkerchief thrown over his hand like a doily. “Am I to understand that if I run off in the middle of a dire battle and then come slinking back with my tail between my legs you’ll throw us another pastry party? Next time with mimosas, I might hope?”

Woljif’s mouth was too full for a retort.

Meanwhile the succubus, on whose request they were currently headed for Greengates, stood off alone keeping an eye on the perilous terrain that lay ahead. Siavash called her over.

“Arueshalae, have one.”

“I shouldn’t,” she said meekly, dark liquid eyes lowered.

“Don’t tell me you’re watching your carbs,” said Seelah. “Sister, you can afford a cherry roll.”

“I’ll eat hers,” Woljif volunteered through stuffed cheeks.

“No, I—I just don’t think it’s right. I wasn’t in Kenabres.”

“You were there in dreams. That counts.”

At Siavash’s apparent sincerity Daeran burst into a peal of mocking laughter. “In that case I shall catch up on my beauty sleep, perchance to dream of striking down a dozen demons. For the cause.” And he settled into a languorous pose with his pack as a pillow.

Seeing Lann’s look of despair Seelah elbowed him. “Don’t be such a sourpuss. It’s not the kind of Crusade I expected when I came here either, but we wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Still, Arueshalae shook her head. “Someone like me doesn’t deserve—”

“Nonsense!” Siavash cut her off. “Arueshalae, if you’d like to join our Merry Band, with all the privileges and responsibilities that entails, you must partake of the sacred cherry roll.”

Bashfully she gave in, taking up the dripping red roll in both hands and, just as she had once done with still-beating human hearts, brought it reverently to her lips.

“Haha! You’re one of us now, like it or not!” Seelah slapped her on the shoulder, rousing a swirl of butterflies.

Later when the others had wandered off to their camp occupations, Siavash found himself alone by the fire with Woljif.

“Thanks, chief,” the tiefling said, patting his stomach with a satisfied grin. “My lucky day. Cherry rolls are my favorite.”

“I know. That’s why I chose them.”

“I—huh—?”

“You mentioned it once.”

“Guess I musta,” Woljif mumbled. His tail twisted.

“I like to take note of little things like that with people,” Siavash explained, just to make sure it was crystal clear he was not flirting.

“Ah, I get it. Part a’ the diplomattin’.”

“Sometimes. And sometimes just part of being a friend.”

Woljif’s tail froze in mid-twist. He began to fidget with the cuffs of his jacket. “You really are an original, chief, you know that?”

“I could say the same of you.” Siavash pinched himself mentally. Stop.

But Woljif chattered on unawares. “I mean, if it was anybody else I’d say you’d get eaten alive out there, tryina make friends with people like me, but I dunno, somehow you pull it off. In fact I’m startin’ to think that’s what landed you the job, and what’s keepin’ this crusade goin’. I don’t bet ol’ Galfrey ever hauled snacks halfway across the Worldwound for her chums. You know how to play the game your way, chief.”

Siavash chuckled. “Nothing gets past you.”

“Ha. Looks like not much gets past you either.” Woljif glanced up and there was a conspiratorial flash in his clever yellow eyes, bordering on affectionate. Suspecting he was being played, and playing along? Suddenly he flushed and pretended to interest himself in the blank horizon of the Worldwound in the opposite direction.

And while his eyes were averted, Siavash stole another look, admiring the way his curls framed his profile in the firelight, and already planning another trip to the Drezen bakery just to see those eyes light up again, and that clever, dimpled, slightly greedy but also sincere smile that made his heart glow warm as the southern Andoren sun.

Stop. Leave the poor guy alone. “I’m glad you liked them,” he said softly as he rose. He couldn’t help placing a hand on Woljif’s shoulder on the way. “And I’m glad you’re back with us.”

Woljif’s cheeks had gone glaringly ruddy. “Yeah, me too, trust me. I mean where else can a guy get cherry rolls out here except with you—guys. Sure as hells not with Baphomet cultists.”

“So you’ll stick around?”

It took a moment for him to answer, like he was working up his courage or struggling with something. Probably, Siavash reflected with regret, all too aware he was being reeled in, and Siavash could do nothing to express his sincerity without crossing the forbidden flirting line, so he just stood there wearing his most reassuring smile and hoping that would do. Let me give you more than snacks. Please trust me.

Woljif shrugged. “Sure.”

A pause.

Woljif sighed. “I mean yeah. I’ll stick around.” Sheepishly returning the smile, the glow of firelight in his eyes was softer than he probably would have liked. “I promise.”

#pathfinder: wrath of the righteous #woljif jefto #siavash x woljif #fanfic #my writing #owlcatober 2023 #pwotr pals

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sunsetsmakemesad · 4 months

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Oshi no Ko chapter 150

Hmm this is interesting

FINALLY we're doing something with the plot

Idk how to feel about Gorou honestly. Whatever he has going on with Sarina is definetly creepy, but atleast he doesn't seem to reciprocate...?

You see there's the problem. Ruby isn't able to let go of "Sarina" even if that's not who she is anymore. She's Ruby Hoshino now, and she has to learn to let go of the past.

It would make for SUCH an interesting arc, if only Aka was interested in developing Ruby as a character😮‍💨

Aka do something with Ruby I'm begging you

Ok so ignoring the weird undertones I am SO HAPPY about this because it basically confirms what I've been thinking of from that one chapter with Aqua and Kana at the start of the manga.

Aqua isn't Gorou, he's developed past the man known as "Gorou". Gorou is dead, and this is something Ruby can't make peace with.

Actually, thinking of this right now, maybe the REASON Ruby can't let go of Sarina is because she was a child when she died. She wants to experience the life she never got to, pretending to be Sarina. And her brain was never fully developed in the first place, so i suppose she can't really start anew? Unlike Gorou, who lived a full life, to some extent.

Also AQUA CALLED HER HIS PRECIOUS LITTLE SISTER DON'T TALK TO ME I AM CRYING

Aqukana crumbs hmm.

Also yeah Aqua is an adolescent! Good to finally have proper confirmation that the thing from the incest chapter was an act to make Ruby happy.

"You don't have to act anymore, you're free to love someone" AAAAAAAAAAAA

Dad(Aka) came back with the milk(the plot)

Cuties

"Cool" you know Aqua is a bit pathethic but alright

He definetly does alright

Tsundere on tsundere interaction(Aqua and Kana)

Also Mengo's artttttt delicious

Imaggeeee limittttt

Basically Kana texts Aqua asking if he's free on saturday and there's a panel of her flustered holding the phone and thinking "I am seriously inlove"

I guess I should be mad about this having a romance plotline but I'm really not. It can be used as a good developer for the characters

Unfortunately Aka seems to have an on-and-off amnesia when it comes to Knowing How To Write.

All in all, delicious chapter

#oshi no ko #oshi no ko liveblog #onk liveblog #oshi no ko chapter 150

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aihoshiino · 5 months

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Oshi no Ko 145: A Story Without 「アイ」

The question of how exactly Aqua and Ruby were reborn is something that floats around vaguely in the early stages of the Oshi no Ko, teased as a mystery that will exist in the background as opposed to one actively pursued for resolution. My theory is that this element of the story was likely more prominent in the version of Oshi no Ko that was originally conceptualized (i.e, the one that did not involve Ai's death) but the abrupt change to the story's dramatic tone and intensity pushed it into the background. As it stands, Aqua's wishy-washy statement that he'll figure it out once he's done enjoying Baby Mode about matches the weight this is given is the narrative, at least to begin with.

Even with the turn in tone and focus the manga takes, we do ultimately circle back to addressing and answering this question via the presence of Crow Girl/Tsukuyomi who seems to be the one responsible for facilitating their reincarnation in some way or another. Admittedly, this reveal in 145 comes a bit abruptly and the implied motivations it ascribes to Tsukuyomi don't… really line up with the things she says and does prior to the Movie Arc. But what really left me a little cold with this reveal is that it does not involve Ai whatsoever. Her name and even her image are not even once mentioned, not even in passing by GRSR.

This made me feel pretty uncomfortable for a variety of reasons I'll get into later but it wasn't until I started going through the manga to look more into how the reincarnation had been discussed before that I realized just why this felt so jarring - it simply wasn't consistent with what came beforehand. While the current explanation excludes Ai entirely, prior discussion of GRSR's reincarnation centers her to an equal and opposite degree.

Both Gorou and Sarina are thinking of Ai as they die, with both of them also (even if only symbolically) hearing her voice in their final moments. Gorou hears her singing as his ringtone plays and Ruby says Ai was "singing in [her] head" up to the very end. Ai's face is implicitly the first thing either of them see after being reborn and Aqua even speculates, as his first guess as to the nature of their rebirth, that it was this strength of feeling all focused on specifically Ai that caused it to happen.

Not only that, but Ai is even centered in the "fake" story of their rebirth that the twins sell Miyako to get her on board.

Perception of this bit in the fandom seems to vary from "it's just a joke" to "Jokes Are The Deepest Lore" and beyond. I myself don't put a massive amount of weight on it. However, in discussions where this is taken even semi-seriously as foreshadowing then it is flatly disingenuous to cherrypick the AQRB crumbs while not giving the same weight to the (imo, equally loaded) implication that Gorou and Sarina were reborn as Ai's children because she herself was favoured by the gods.

As the murder mystery elements of the story take prominence, this question is left unanswered but resurfaces towards the end of the Private arc with the arrival of Tsukuyomi. Here, too, we see Ai being centered as a key figure in Gorou and Sarina's reincarnation - the chapter is even named 'Mother and Mother', in reference to both of Aqua's mothers for each of his lives.

Most tellingly of all to me, however, is Tsukuyomi's appearance at the end of the chapter. Literally her first speaking line is commenting on how kind the gods must be to bring the Hoshinos together - describing them as (paraphrased) two motherless children and a childless mother and ascribing a great deal of weight to their togetherness.

Even if you disagree that the manga is centering Ai in this context, it is undeniable that the togetherness of the Hoshinos as a trio and specifically as a mother and children is what Tsukuyomi is highlighting as being meaningful here.

We even see a repeat of this in chapter 118 and her first on-screen conversation with Aqua.

I've seen people take this to mean, in the context of future chapter hindsight, that she is claiming the 'meaning' of his rebirth is his connection to Ruby. But if you go back and follow the thread that leads to this mic drop... it's a conversation that's about Ai. And specifically, Aqua is told to consider what it means that his soul was reborn in that body (emphasis mine): i.e, what does it mean that he was reborn specifically as Ai Hoshino's son?

With all this laid out, I really don't think it's a stretch to say that Ai, both as an idol and a person, is treated as a more or less equal part of the GRSR -> AQRB reincarnation as the two people being reborn. Which, like… she should be! She's their mother. But when we do finally get around to concretely answering this question..

Zip. Zilch. Nada. It had nothing to do with her. The closest we get to an acknowledgement that she even exists full stop is her goofy ass bunny mascot's face on (presumably) Sarina's snowman.

As I've said before, the basic beats of this as an answer to 'why reincarnation' are not inherently bad or unworkable. An animal repaying human kindness in some supernatural way is a tale as old as tales and given the ways in which Oshi no Ko plays around with mythological and folkloric ideas, making the reincarnation the result of a Tsuru no Ongaeshi-esque repayment of selfless kindness suits it quite well. The issue here is not one of an inherently broken idea, but flawed execution.

If this is the final word on the hows and whys of Gorou and Sarina's reincarnation - and I feel more or less settled that it is - then Ai has been entirely excluded from the birth of her own children. The sheer amount of weight placed on her role, specifically, as Aqua and Ruby's mother has vanished because after all the build up of why? the answer seems to be just that she happened to be pregnant.

I don't think I need to overexplain why it feels gross for Ai to be reduced to a convenient walking uterus in this regard. This was the element of this answer that made me so uncomfortable when from the get go: Ai's arc is so overwhelmingly about her being denied the right to agency over her own body and sexuality and her giving birth to Aqua and Ruby is, in part, a reclamation of it. It wasn't just an act of love performed for her children but also one for herself - she risked everything in order to give herself the family she had longed for her entire life.

If this incongruity was intentional, I think I would be interested in it as an element of Ai's tragedy - the idea that even the birth of her own children was hijacked by forces beyond her control and warped into something that existed to serve her fans. But I really don't get the sense that this was considered at all and honestly… that's kind of equally sad.

I was wordvomiting a much less articulate version of all the above in the Oshi no Brainrot Discord server and @penguinkyun said a few things that I think really nailed the heart of the issue here:

"theres barely anything of ai here when shes such a central character […] removing ai's own emotional stake in the matter and rounding it up to "crow girl felt bad for gorou and sarina because they helped her that one time and then reincarnated them" just…doesnt hold the same impact."

This is, I think, key to what made this reveal fall so flat for me and highlights this chapter's place in a much broader trend of Ai's place in the twins' lives being downplayed and favour of amping up the intensity of the GRSR relationship. To once again quote Lace because I think she sums it up quite neatly:

"[...] akasaka is absolutely ramping up the soap operaness of grsr with ai as collateral."

And that just kind of bums me out. :(

#oshi no ko #onk spoilers #oshi no posting #meta essay #ai hoshino

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