#basically I just don’t trust Attic Guy

[thesacredreznor]

for six months now I have been trying to get this work on my attic finished and finally I get a text out of the blue from Attic Guy saying “today? can we do it today” which like, fine. yes. I really need this done and it happens to be my day off. so I texted back saying today was good and asking what time and of course no response. it’s been an hour. I suppose I should just go ahead and cancel on my agility instructor but I am going to be so pissed off if I get stuck in contractor limbo all day and this work doesn’t actually get done.

I’ve been a homeowner for about a year and I can confidently say that I do not understand what possess people to remodel their homes. working with contractors is like pulling teeth. I have two (2) big projects that needed to be done this year and I literally never want to go through any of this ever again. the next time my house needs work done I would rather just move.

[prince-rowan-of-the-forest]

Across Land And Water, Now and Forever

Epilogue : Three Years Later

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| Ao3 |

<- Previous Chapter | First Chapter |

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Two towers on two cliffs, a village for those who are lost and alone and a family, finally all together.

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Word count: 2433

Notes:

This is it!! Thank you so much again to @sandersarefamily for beta reading, and thank you to @nandysparadox for the inspiration, I really hope you liked this gift <3 (I hope you guys are ok with me tagging you again :/)

Merry Christmas to everyone who celebrates!

If anyone out there wants to see more of this au I will /gladly/ deliver, don't be afraid to ask :D I love this au so much and would really like to write more, haha.

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“Whoever said you were allowed to build this place across the valley from me-”

“That someone was you-”

“Is an absolute fiend,” The witch finished their sentence. Janus leaned forward into their doorway as Virgil smirked back at them, “You know when I agreed to give your mer-boyfriends the potions to give them legs, I did not agree to be tormented every day for the foreseeable future.”

“Ah but you’re just so easy to torment!” Virgil snickered, teleporting so that he was behind Janus and snagging the hat off of their head. The witch spun around, looking practically violated.

“You are horrible and I wish I had never had the displeasure of meeting you or any of your silly troop,” they grumbled.

“Awe, love you too Jan,” Virgil grinned, jamming the hat onto his own head and sticking his tongue out at the witch.

“My dark and stormy knight!” Virgil heard Roman basically scream from somewhere along the cliff, though he was very quickly closing the distance between them, “I require saving!”

Virgil had to teleport again to catch Roman (he was really really glad that Janus had helped him gain more control of his magic, even if he did mostly use it for pranks now) as he did one of those stupid trust falls he seemed to enjoy doing so much. As soon as he had caught Roman he teleported them out of Remus’ way onto the top of their half built attic, where they were planning to find a way to make an observatory for Logan. Despite this, Remus had decided that not slowing down when Virgil had appeared was the best course of action in such a situation. Their teleport had left Remus to barrel into Janus instead and Virgil couldn’t help but cackle as Janus was knocked off of his feet. 

“What in all the high seas is causing such a cacophony as I’m attempting to read,” Logan sighed from nearby, though he didn’t seem annoyed at them, just fond. Virgil kissed Roman on the cheek before setting him down on his feet.

“My dearest apologies, starlight,” Roman said with a bow, “My brother was attempting to perform fratricide again.”

“Ah, I see, well I’m glad that Virgil was able to save you in time,” Logan said with half a smile, “Though I don’t believe it to be wise for you to leave our apparent guests unattended for too long, I don’t wish for Remus to destroy the kitchen for the fifth time since it was built.”

“I’ll go check on the kitchen,” Virgil said with a smile and a roll of his eyes as he made his way to the stairs. Patton turned and waved from the kitchen when he arrived, where- from the smell- it could be guessed that he was baking some kind of fruit pie. It had turned out that after Roman had taken the time to teach Patton how to use the ovens that the mer was an extremely talented baker. Unfortunately though, that skill didn’t extend to cooking. 

Remus had sprawled himself over the back of one of their sofas like a disgruntled cat while Janus leaned on the doorway, barely concealed pout on their face. Virgil made his way immediately over to the witch when he saw that Remus wasn’t causing any immediate issues.

“Here, Snakeface,” Virgil huffed fondly, handing back the hat he had stolen, Janus snatched it back with all the ferocity of a toddler pretending to be mad and plonked it back on their head. The witch took a moment to rearrange the ribbons before sending Virgil a barely potent glare.

When they had arrived back at the coast Janus had allowed him, Roman and Patton to stay with him during the short time it took Logan to return to their kingdom to relay the messages from the meeting to their king before getting permission to return to land. It had been a tedious process that had taken much longer than any of them would have liked. In the time it had taken for Logan to return from the sea, Virgil and Janus had developed an odd kind of brotherly relationship all while Patton- very slowly- got more comfortable around Remus.

And of course Roman was ecstatic to see his brother again. Virgil was pretty sure he had kept his brother in a tight embrace for the best of two hours, which might’ve been the longest he’d ever seen Roman stay still, let alone Remus. Janus had commented that he’d never seen Remus stay still for two minutes- let alone two hours. 

Logan had returned a month later with permission to stay on the land provided that they made the journey for the meetings every summer to avoid any other mers from their kingdom having to travel across land. And the group had agreed- to Janus’ dismay and Remus’ delight- to begin to build a tower-like house for the four of them on the other side of the headland to the pair so they were always within easy distance to annoy them both.

“Hey Pattoncake!” Roman called, taking the stairs two at a time, “How’s the pie coming?”

“It’s going great!” Patton smiled back, turning to face Roman, “It’s almost done, so you can start preparing dinner if you need the space?”

“That’s wonderful, my dear,” Roman said, leaning down to kiss Patton’s forehead all while he searched for something in one of their cupboards, Patton went red, as he always did, “Virge, dearest, do you think you could gather some thyme and rosemary from the garden?”

“Are you two going to be staying for dinner?” Virgil asked Janus as he slipped out of the front door and made his way around their house to the large gardens that Roman and Logan had spent hours painstakingly setting up. They had been growing everything from flowers to vegetables and it had already come incredibly handy in the time they had been living here- it simply meant they didn’t have to go to the nearest town for groceries every week.

“Aren’t your weirdo family coming over tonight?” Janus asked, leaning against the wall.

“Yes,” Virgil answered as he plucked a handful of thyme from the carefully contained plant and moved onto the rosemary, “Kai and Talyn are coming over for dinner today, as they do every Sunday, you’re still both welcome to stay as well.”

“Are you certain eight of us will fit into your kitchen?” Janus asked, raising an eyebrow. Virgil groaned.

“If I say eight of you will fit in my kitchen, eight of you will fit in my kitchen,” 

“Alright alright if you say so,” Janus raised their hands, in a mock surrender, “We’ll stay for dinner, that is, as long as Kai agrees to at least attempt to go five minutes without insulting me.”

Virgil couldn’t help but snort, “I doubt it, that’s just their personality.”

“Well I would’ve thought they’d show me a little more gratitude, considering I did help to break them out of prison.” 

“They do show you gratitude, you ass,” Virgil rolled his eyes as he stood up and made his way back to the door, “Talyn literally brings you those lemon cakes you like so much every week they come, and Kai always brings you those sea glass bracelets-”

“Yes, I have more of those than I know what to do with at this point,” Janus said, rolling their eyes in a way that Virgil hoped was fond (Janus better hope so too, because if it wasn’t Virgil would not hesitate to smack the little snake) “Ask them to bring me some kind of variety, will you?”

“Ask them yourself,” Virgil said, elbowing Janus before jogging back into the kitchen and handing the herbs over to Roman. Talyn and Kai- alongside a whole host of other magic folk- had been broken out of the city prison not long after Logan had returned from the sea by a group of six mysterious bandits (or at least that’s what the city called them, Virgil knew exactly who had broken them out because he’d been there, he wouldn’t have had it any other way). Kai and Talyn had opted to set up a small village consisting only of magic folk a further ways down the coast from Janus’ tower and the pair had began to fufil the old dream that they had almost given up on of creating a safe haven for magic folk from the kingdom. They still one day hoped to overthrow the king, but that was a goal for the future, they had other things to focus on right now. 

It didn’t stop them from coming down to join them for dinner every Sunday. Neither did anything stop them from bringing a wagon load of gifts ranging from jewellery to magical items to food to “a cool piece of bark one of the fae found and insisted we brought for you” from the village as a thank you from its people. Virgil and the others appreciated the gifts, really, but they were already running out of room to display everything they had been gifted in their house.

“Hey Virgil! Do you mind grabbing me a mat?” Patton called as he brought his pie out of the oven. Virgil darted to grab one of the ceramic mats they used so that the wooden counters wouldn’t get burned when a hot pan was placed down from the cupboard and placed it down on the counter, “Thank you, sunshine!”

“He’s hardly sunshine,” Janus said from across the room with a snort, “That is a horribly inaccurate nickname.”

“Yeah? Well he’s like sunshine to me,” Patton said with a pout aimed at Janus, before pulling Virgil into a side hug.

“Nothing about me even slightly resembles sunshine.”

“Not even your sunny disposition?” Logan said from the staircase, his voice dripping with sarcasm, he’d definitely gotten better at that, “Or perhaps your consistently dark clothing.”

“It could be the moonlight-pale skin!” Roman added, “Or the midnight purple in his hair.”

“Maybe it’s ‘cuz he’s so hot that he has two fish and my dumbass brother fawning over him all the fuckin’ time!” Remus called from the couch.

“Language, and also I can’t tell if that was supposed to be mean or not,” Patton said walking over to the couch to look down at Remus, “But if it was supposed to be mean I’m gonna be putting cabbage in your bread for the foreseeable future.”

“How dare you threaten me with such atrocities!” Remus cried in a way that was much too reminiscent of Roman, “I’ll throw you off the cliff, fish boy!”

“Ok ok, no-one is throwing anyone off of cliffs,” Janus cut in smoothly, “Remus, apologise.”

“He threatened me first,” Remus said, glaring at Patton over the back of the sofa. Patton stuck his tongue out and turned back to the kitchen to begin helping Roman with whatever dinner he had chosen to prepare. 

“Are Janus and Remus staying for dinner as well?” Logan asked as he placed his book back into the bookshelf. 

Virgil hummed an affirmative and Logan nodded before collecting sets of cutlery from a draw and beginning to set the table. He managed to cram eight places onto their relatively small dining table, and Virgil sent a smirk in Janus’ direction. 

As Logan was placing the last of the forks on the table though, he stopped and looked around, before smiling softly and turning to the others.

“They’re here,” Logan announced, “I hear them coming.”

Talyn had barely gotten down from the driving seat of the wagon Virgil had given them back after breaking them out before Virgil had pulled them into a tight hug, Despite seeing them both every week Virgil didn’t think he would ever get used to being apart from them for long, especially after they’d lived together for almost all of their time on this earth. 

Roman greeted Kai with a fist bump which turned into a half hug and a fond ‘salad boy’ comment before Virgil let go of Talyn and helped to untie Thomas the horse from the cart. Patton had immediately hurried out to say hello to the horse before sheepishly greeting Talyn and Kai after being reminded that yes, they were here too. 

“Janus and Remus are staying for dinner too,” Virgil told them as Patton happily chatted away to Kai about everything and anything, “I hope you don’t mind.”

“Of course not,” Talyn said with a smile, before batting Virgil’s arm, “Your friends are my friends, unless they’re jerks, then I’ll beat them up.”

“Hopefully they don’t qualify as jerks then,” Virgil smiled. 

“Definitely not,” Talyn rolled their eyes, “Remus bit the guy who was guarding my cell in the prison, how could I ever think anyone was a jerk after being so valiantly rescued, heck I like him more than your salad boyfriend.”

Virgil couldn’t help the burst of laughter that escaped him at Talyn’s half joking tone, “And- and Janus?”

“Oh yeah they are a jerk,” Talyn said, rolling their eyes as the pair followed the others into the house, “But I can tolerate them for everyone else’s sake.”

“Thank goodness for that, I’m tolerable,” Janus said, Virgil could feel the eye roll from across the room.

“You try your hardest not to be and everyone knows it,” Talyn said, walking over and smacking Janus’ hat so it covered their entire face, earning Talyn a disgruntled yell and blind slapping in their general direction.

“You-” Janus started with a glare as they attempted to right the hat, “You are a menace to all society.”

“Like you’re any better,” Talyn rolled their eyes before shoving Janus and walking over to Logan to start up another conversation. The witch looked like they’d just been handed the worst insult you could think of tenfold. 

—-

The eight of them sat around the dinner table, eating the food that Roman had prepared. Patton and Talyn fired puns and back forth whilst Logan looked as though he could barely hold back from face planting into his plate. Roman was laughing as Remus added rude comments every now and again that broke up the flow because Patton had to yell something about language before going back to his train of thought and Janus and Kai watched them all with fond smiles whilst they thought no–one was looking at them. 

With all of this, Virgil thought it was pretty obvious that he really didn’t regret going on the adventure three years ago. 

No, he didn’t regret it one bit. 

<- Previous Chapter

[inkmemes]

this  country  (  2017  -  2020  )  sentence  starters ↪  taken  from  the  bbc  mockumentary.  trigger  warning  for  mentions  of  religion,  death,  sex.  alter  as  you  see  fit  ♡

“i like the underdog.”

“don't be a fucking dick.”

“everyone comes together on days like today and just forgets their utter hatred of each other.”

“everyone who's anyone's going to be there and there are people from my past that would love to see me slain.”

“there's a tea rooms there and under the counter they've got a panic button and if i take one step inside, they can press that. the police will be there in three minutes.”

"he whatsapped me the other day asking us to go laser quest with him and i ... well, i clicked on it by accident, didn't i? so he knows i've seen it."

"i mean, i get it, but it's not making me feel nothing."

“it's baffling. i'm baffled by the entire situation, if i'm honest.”

“what the actual fuck? what the actual fuck? you have fucking lost your head, mate. you have lost your fucking head.”

“when i get hold of you, i swear to god i will fucking deck you.”

"someone's just been throwing plums at my house. i'm going to kill them. i can't believe it. i can't believe it. all over this. plumming on here, plumming on that. plum on the sofa, look! there's nothing left that hasn't been plummed."

“i've had a target on my back since the day i was born.”

“thank you very much, enjoy your free potatoes.”

“do you know how small your brain is?”

“hogwarts is that way, dumbledore.”

“he used to say i looked like the puppet off the dolmio advert.”

“there's a kid crying over there. do you want me to...? i can tell him to shut the fuck up if you want?”

“he genuinely looked like a moomin.”

“on my first day of karate club, karate master goes to me, [name], i don't know why you're here because i can't teach you anything. if anything, you should be teaching me." and just gave me his black belt.”

“you know that little old blind man? yeah, when i was punching him in his face, the lens from his glasses broke and cut my knuckle.”

“some things are just best left in the past, where they belong.”

“what's the point in knocking if you're just going to walk in anyway?”

“it was a miscarriage of justice though, cos what people forget is 12 out of them 20 hostages actually found it funny.”

“i lied so much i still don't know what's real life and what's plain lies.”

“i'm so glad you're out of that lying phase.”

“he likes to be the only person on the road, so whenever he sees a car coming the other way he just pulls over.”

“nasa went through hundreds of them in the '60s. and now every time i see a really bright star in the sky i can't wish on it, cos in my head i'm thinking, ‘that's probably just a spacecraft with some monkey bones in it.’”

“you absolute traitor. that's my cheese - it's my fucking house!”

“don't you dare eat that cheese. you eat that and i will smash this. i promise you, i will smash you with this.”

“fuck! you switched them!”

“yeah, i can see it's fucking burnt, sherlock.”

“i honestly am ashamed to know him, sometimes.”

“if you knock on someone's door, don't take no for an answer. get into their house. if they say, ‘leave my house’, stay. and if they say, ‘i'm going to call the police’, you walk upstairs and see if there's anybody else upstairs to sell to.”

“she looks like uncle fester.”

“right. i'm going to piss in their flowers, then.”

“you really need to go home. your mum's called the police and everything.”

“you're also fired from being my best mate, by the way.”

“in business, there will always be setbacks. i don't drink my own juice, fray bentos doesn't eat his own pies. but that's business.”

“do you know what, i don't actually want to play this any more, because it is actually very, very boring.”

“i'm ashamed of myself, that's not usually me, so don't get the wrong impression.”

“i genuinely think one of them fancies me as well.”

“it's fate her moving across the street.”

“the problem with finding a girlfriend in the village is that most of the girls you meet round here are old-age pensioners.”

“yeah, i am looking for a relationship, but thing is i've just got so many trust issues, yeah, with being fucked over massive in the past, so no matter how much i get close to someone now i'm thinking in the back of my head, ‘shit, am i going to get fucked over?’ because i've been fucked over in the past massively. my last relationship proper fucked me up.”

“i went through a really dark phase. listening to papa roach and just blowing everything up with them little french bangers.”

“shut up, you don't know what you're talking about!”

“i don't like the man. i know he's my uncle, but i don't like him.”

“it's just malicious lies, that's all it is.”

“i'm not saying i've got a cruel heart, but if she ain't willing to take me as i am rather than the monster i've become, then she can literally just jog on back to sea with all the other fish cos i don't care.”

“what do you look for in a boyfriend?”

“the key to dating, yeah, is the two rs and the three ts. 'respect, rapport, and talking, talking, talking.' don't ever let that ball hit the ground. good relationships are built on great conversation.”

“on a date, you've got to tell them all the interesting stuff about you, because that's what they'll be interested in.”

“he said to me, he goes, ‘you can't smoke on here.’ i said, ‘i'm not smoking, i'm vaping.’ the look on his face when i said that. i don't think he knew what vaping… what a vape is.”

“you would make me the happiest mouse if you say yes and become my spouse.”

“here's a tip, [name], next time you take a chick out on a date, don't bore her to tears.”

“roses are red, violets are blue, i've got five fingers, the third one's for you.”

“get out of my way, pipe cleaner.”

“[name] phoned me the other day at three in the morning saying, ‘come quick,

there's a hedgehog in the garden that looks exactly like grandad.’ so i got up, i got dressed and i ran over to [name]'s as fast as i could and then i just stopped in the middle of the street at three in the morning and thought, ‘what the fuck am i doing with my life?’

“you're joking me? because if you are joking me, that is massively harsh.”

“oh, let me get a song up on youtube. you're going to absolutely love this, [name]. here we go… listen to this. oh, for fuck's sake, advert.”

“let's go down the pub and get shitfaced.”

“where do i see myself in five years? well, me and [name] will have a flat in the middle of the village and all of our furniture will be inflatable and we'll have cable and it will pay for itself, because we're going to use the spare room to breed quails, because their eggs are worth fucking shitloads.”

“is this about the calippo, still? because you offered to buy me that.”

“if he wants to go, good luck to him, i say. i reckon he thinks that i can't live without him, which is a laugh, because he went a whole weekend away once and i got on all right. i just ended up following this cat around the village.”

“i've got to do what's right for me, at the end of the day, instead of worrying about other people.”

“how about you say sorry? sorry for the massive knife that's hanging out the back of my back because of you.”

“oh, and while you're stabbing me in the back, feel free to bend down and kiss my arse.”

“can i just ask you an honest question? why would you want to leave the village when we've got a pub and a shop?”

“i think you don't know how lucky we have it to be doing nothing with our lives, like. we're all going to die, anyway, so what's the point in doing anything?”

“i want ownership of the words fucknut and dickmilk.”

“i had this come through the post. and i've got a few concerns about it. firstly, this guy on the front looks really arrogant. not the sort of guy i was expecting, if i'm honest.”

“this is starting to stress me out a little bit.”

“why are you trying to stress me out? you know i'm already stressed out as it is.”

“the bloke that used to live in there, right, kept hearing strange noises coming out of his attic at night. and he'd go to the fridge and find that food was missing from the fridge. so he thought, ‘i'm just going to go up to the attic and check this out.’ and he found an entire family of peruvian panpipe buskers just living up there. and he thought ‘i'm just going to leave them to it, ‘cos they're not really doing me any harm.’ and then, a few years later, he thought, "well, i'll just go up to the attic to check on them. ‘see if they're all right.’ and it turned out they'd all died of asbestos poisoning. yeah, he doesn't live here any more.”

“some people will always be scared of me, and i can't change that, no matter how nice i am. but there's a balance to be had between being nice and being feared.”

“don't really like catching up. it's not my thing.”

“i just watched this video of this girl doing a random act of kindness on youtube. she basically paid for this old man's shopping at the till. and this old man was, like, about 90 years old. and he's so fucking old, like, you could see through his skin. and he just starts bawling his eyes out. he's like, ‘you're fucking joking me, this ain't fucking real life.’ i just thought... i want to make someone feel like that. ‘cos that's... i really… that's what i want to do.”

“i'm not dead. just can't be arsed to text her sometimes.”

“you know, correct me if i'm wrong, but four texts a day is complete madness. no-one can keep up with that.”

“i am doing kind things selfishly.”

“i was at midnight mass one year, right, someone got tipped off i was there. as i was coming out the church, someone tries to shoot me with a crossbow.”

“well, i haven't seen the film, have i? that's why i came here - to watch the fucking film - like a normal human being.”

“i've made an effort by coming here tonight. i didn't want to come.”

“i had to wheel him here from his house in an asda trolley, cos he was just too heartbroken to move.”

“sometimes you don't know what you got until you ain't got it any more. like blockbuster's. i just took 'em for granted - and then, one day, gone, and you spend ages trying to figure out what went wrong, and then you realise it was your fault all along.”

“i thought you said you wanted to fix things.”

“she wanted it to go that way, and it just wasn't gonna go that way. she even got me thinking that they'd get back together… ..but that's manipula.... manipulative people... do that. and he's better off without her.”

“that wasn't much to write home about.”

“it's fucking dead, isn't it?”

“basically, somebody's been sending me threatening letters, and i don't know who's doing it - and i am concerned, because my peripheral vision is poor, so, if somebody attacks me from the sides or snipes at me from an upstairs window, i am fucked - but my hearing is excellent, see? so i just need to spend a few days inside honing my sonar, and i'll be fine then.”

“if you don't like the work, the circus is in town and they're always looking for clowns.”

“his soul is just going to crumble to dust.”

“this really is not a good situation for me. a physical threat is something that i can deal with, but a sexual thing is not my area of expertise.”

“just really fucked in the head, mate.”

“what have i done? i haven't done anything wrong.”

“do you know how sad that is? that is so, actually, sad. that makes me sad for you, that you can't take a joke.”

“i think i just got a bit carried away with the whole thing.”

“your finger's going up my arsehole, mate.”

“i'll hold the back of your head, so you don't bash yourself.”

“when i lie in future, i don't want a massive lecture on how bad lying is, cos deep down, you're the worst of us all, mate.”

“i'd quite like a coke.”

“it's going to be like gluing a breadstick back together, because… like, as if a breadstick's been in a blender and it's all… ...the pieces smashed up.”

“like, this one time i started a fight club in the village hall, and i got a black eye from beating myself up. but it made my enemies think, ‘fuck, if she can do that to herself, what the fuck can she do to me?’”

“i'm absolutely 1,000% sure i've broken it in two places.”

“i knew this day would come.”

“i should be in tk maxx, getting the bargains that i deserve.”

“unlike you, [name], i'm not a fashion disaster.”

“i'm still warm in my grave, and she's sucking off the pallbearer.”

“you know, it took me ten years to get over [name], and i only went out with her for half a day.”

“i swear to god, if i see him here again, i swear to god, i will have no hesitation in just going up to him and just planting one on his face.”

“right, then keep your nose out of my business, yeah? nosy old cock-womble.”

“[name]’s attitude to me is puzzling. if i walk past her in the street

and say hi, she'll tell me to fuck off. yet every year, she sends me a really sweet, nice christmas card. you know, there's just no consistency there.”

“he's good-looking up close, isn't he?”

“don't show me any weakness, because i will take advantage.”

“no, put the brick down, you fucking psychopath.”

“when i asked him, he just said, ‘come to my office now,’ which means we're in the fucking shit, cos we're always in fucking shit.”

“i shouldn't be paying you at all.”

“i've always had a son. i talk about him all the time.”

“he's my son. he's not my dog.”

“it reminds me of the wicker man. i don't really know why.”

“i just find it weird how you can be so close to someone and they can be such a big part of your life, and then the next minute, you're just sort of strangers in the night.”

“i don't want the emotional implications.”

“well, about five years ago, i sold my birthday to my mum for about 200 quid, which means my mum's legally entitled now to never celebrate my birthday ever again for the rest of my life. not even, like, a happy birthday cup of tea, or a moonpig card, nothing - which is the worst decision i ever made in my entire life.”

“he deserves that anyway, because he's been sexting my nan, so…”

“what's this surprise? cos i need to know whether it's going to be worth this walk.”

“i always see them banners above the motorway, and i always thought, ‘who the fuck does them?’ well, now i know. people like me.”

“did you know you can't get stung by a stinging nettle if you grab the leaf top and bottom, like that? it's only when you touch it on the sides, it stings. agh, actually, that stung, then.”

“pez dispenser, they're cursed. they are, i'm not even joking. honestly, when i had one of them, i had the worst bout of bad luck i ever had in my life.”

“i swear down, it's a short cut. it might be a pleasant walk, we might enjoy it.”

“i'm not scared of the fox twins. i'd just like to sit them down and ask 'em plainly, ‘look, guys, what is going on? ‘cos this has just gotten completely out of hand now. you know, stop walking on your knuckles, stand up straight, be the best version of you that you can be. get a job, even. there's a trolley boy who works at tesco's, you know, who may as well have been raised by wolves. if he can get a job, you guys can walk it.’”

“yes, there has been talk of strange goings-on in the woods, ghost sightings and the like. but… ...they're never from particularly reliable sources.”

“i live with a ghost. there's a ghost in that house. he's like a civil war cavalier, with all the hair and the hat and all that. and every time i walk into the living room, he doffs his cap. and on his shoulder, he's got this crow that barks at me. it means i spend less time in the house, really. not because of him, because he's-he's quite peaceable. but the crow is malevolent. and i'm not having that. i can't share my house with a malevolent bird.”

“that's haunted as fuck.”

“am i going mad here, or does that, to you, look like that's where just ghost will hang out all the time?”

“look at him, little red riding twat.”

“if he's got an attitude with me, i swear to god, i'll just grab the steering wheel and drive us all into a wall.”

“it's a bit annoying, actually. cos this is not the first or the second time i've had to tell you, really, is it?”

“his sparkle has just gone.”

“you know my dad actually wrote the song wonderwall on the back of a beer mat in the space of ten minutes, don't you?”

“i've just got a tiny, tiny, tiny little favour to ask you.”

“when i think of [name], i think of someone who is very loyal. and very, very stupid. sort of more stupid than loyal. sort of 70% stupid, 30% loyal, probably. because she's very loyal. but extremely stupid.”

“do you know what? i actually don't think he loves you at all and i don't think he's ever loved you.”

“all right, that's harsh and unnecessary, but fine.”

“frankly, she is behaving like the antichrist.”

“i literally just got here.”

“you are such an unemotional slab of ham, [name].”

“i've got so much shit on that man you would not believe.”

“there's something in my eye.”

“i just can't quit him, you know?”

“yeah, we might have a fiery relationship,  but when we're together, it's just… it's just pure chemistry, isn't it?”

“i'm not proud of it, believe me. but at the end of the day, i'm a very vindictive person, you know? it is what makes me me.”

“i basically went out and bought an alpaca off gumtree for £500. of all the mistakes i've made in my life, that was possibly the largest. definitely the physically largest.”

“yeah, i really don't wanna talk about that.”

“her only loyalty is to herself, staffies, and the tv channel dave… ...which, in my opinion, is a tv channel made by knuckle-draggers for knuckle-draggers.”

“i can't move on till i've seeked revenge, unfortunately.”

“if that was in france, that would be fine, but we're not in france.”

“the only thing we had in common, really, was stealing, and that was more my thing that i got him onto. but it just goes to show, you know, some friendships last and some friendships don't, but that's just the way it is.”

“you know it was me that got you sacked, don't you?”

“the thing i learnt about friendship is, you gotta accept each other's flaws, no matter how toxic they may be.”

“shit-stirring from beyond the grave.”

[apparentlyaswarmofbees]

Deaf MC vs Devildom

.

A HUGE thanks to @jaywalk-on-me for reaching out to me about this subject. I really hope I have given this it some justice.

Also, to avoid some of the controversies inside the Deaf Culture: I will not be referencing cochlear implants.

And a note for my fellow hearing people, there is definetelly not much difference between us and deaf/hard of hearing people, in fact, after reading about it, I can hardly consider it a disability seeing it can actually allow them to percieve the world in a much different way from ours and would not have any problems in their life if only us, hearing peers, were cooperative and understanding. Everything we need to do is literally minor details and does not hinder our own lifes in the slightest, in fact, it can even help us too! An example is captioning, there is literally nothing to lose, and honestly, even I put captioning on movies of my mother lenguage because sometimes I just can't understand what is being said and captions really help me with that and enjoy whatever I am watching to the fullest! So let's be more understanding. We are all humans, and can all learn from each other's perspective.

And as always

Warning: Uncensored swearing lol, and reference to lesson 16

.

Lucifer

Ah, yes, he knew about it, was in your files, nailed it, he learned your local sign lenguage, all good.

Except his expressions are so damn stiff.

He signs a 'Welcome to The Devildom' and I kid you not, you will not be able to tell if he is trying to be welcomingly polite (and failing miserably) or threatening you.

It was definetelly both

He gets better at it-

Perks if you like classic music though, because you will be able to give him a whole different way of enjoying it.

He won't force you to speak if you choose not to, but he sure will never stop being delighted to hear your voice if you do.

It still baffles him how observant you are, may start trusting you to find details he missed on certain things.

.

Mammon

He definetelly forgot everything he learned on sign lenguage the moment he stepped out of the tutoring Lucifer made him and all his brothers, except for Levi and Satan, go through.

Yes he will mistake around 5 signs per day on the first week of your arrival in the Devildom.

And he will often forget that you most likelly cannot hear him (if his voice frequency doesn't match your hearing that is) and go off blabbing without signing and then just go "oi why ya ignoring me" and he definetelly is this close 👌to being wacked with the closest thing at range.

Again, he gets better too.

In fact, once he warms up to you (and that's like, real fucking fast) he will make so much effort to get things right, and he always pays attention to have captions in movie nights even without you asking??

He tries lip reading once when you told him it's not easy and, I will let it to your imagination what on hell he managed to lip read.

.

Leviathan

As mentioned above, he didn't need the tutoring. Why? Guess what, he already knew at least a few sign lenguages, all because of the many animes, games and shows he has watched portray it, even though the ammount of representation is small.(btw I recomend DARK, there is a deaf&mute character and oh boi she's awesome, it's on netflix)

So he definetelly had no problem communicating with you, in fact, he was almost relieved.

He doesn't need to speak verbally?? He basically would rather spoon his eyes out than talk on the phone so on drug levels texting instead is like heroin????

And oh lord you NEED to invite him to the music festivals on the human world catered towards deaf and hard of hearing people, be will LOVE it.

A little bit of downside though, some of his expression changes are very subtle, but as he spends more time with you, he will start incorporating character voices into expressions and body lenguage instead, and you bet he enjoys doing it.

He will definetelly make music just for you. You only hear high frequencies? Or maybe only low frequencies? Or just nothing at all but you enjoy the rythmic vibrations? He definetelly has spend an entire night making a full fucking album just for you.

.

Satan

Seriously, he knows so many sign lenguages it actually made his way of signing pretty unique!

Another fake ass who will give you gentlemany smiles at first. He may be a way lot more smoother than Lucifer but you bet his fake ass is not passing your vibe check, not with the way his eyes just feel a little bit not right.

Another one who gets better though.

It's kind of nice how he grows so used to signing while speaking that his hands often give off a sign or two even when he is speaking to hearing people.

He will definetelly roast quite a few half assed interpreters.

Also he may or may not have gotten a new obssession after you two watched a few silent movies together??

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Asmodeus

Oh boy this one needs to chill out a bit.

If you can't interpret signs when done too fast then good luck because his hands will literally be able to spell a full fucking paragraph in 20 seconds.

And oh how he explores your other senses.

Definetelly goes to you first to judge how he looks.

Also he is the best option to keep yourself informed?? I mean, it's also something he can relate with, it doesn't matter if someone killed somebody or just broke their nail, he needs to know about it.

He may be a bit disappointed if you don't speak but he gets over it quickly.

Will ruin many people's carreer if they so much as refuse to attent to you just because you're deaf. There's just nothing wrong with it??? Stop being so petty!

He is now your biggest distraction in mid class and you will definetelly end each day carrying at least 10 paper notes in which he will try to speak with you. They definetelly smell like whatever he smells like at the time. And are definetelly written in colored pen. With glitter. And there are hearts. And possibly a kiss mark-

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Beelzebub

Big boy definetelly has two types of sign lenguage he uses, and if literally depends if he is eating and what he is eating.

Normally he is just, normal lol. Since he is pretty much quite a bit of an amateur at it he will make use of speech filters a lot when he needs to remember certain signs.

If he's holding something big like a sandwich he will either just gulf it all in to have both hands free or try to make a simplified version with one hand. I'll admit the first scenario is quite amusing.

Yes some of the first questions he asks is how to spells certain foods.

And yes you bet you won't be able to know all of them because Devildom food is definetelly something.

Oh and get ready for a bit of chaos if anyone refuses your order because you're deaf.

Please tell him to flap his wings and proceed lay on him or hug him. The vibrations will be very much close to one of those massage chairs.

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Belphegor

Oh boy.

First off, he did NOT know about you being deaf because thanks Lucifer.

You guys definetelly spoke in a lot of exchanged notes under his attic door.

He keeps them all hidden somewhere but he will never admit it.

If you're willing to teach him at least how to say 'hi', 'good night' or things like that, he will appear to not be very interested but once the entire lesson 16 fiasco happens they're definetelly the only signs he knows about for some reason when he finally gets tutored.

Still texts you instead.

Even in the same room.

That's what you get from the avatar of sloth I guess-

He does sign a few remarks at you per example commenting on how the new hairstyle Asmo decided to make made his bangs look like a poop behind his back.

Also this:

(The picture above actually happened and was translated to english from my mother lenguage)

[kast43]

HOW WOULD THE OBEY ME! DEMON BROS REACT TO MC, WHO IS SCARED OF THUNDERSTORMS?

💋Lucifer💋

•Lucifer took MC out to run some errands

•he made a mental note that MC would look up at the sky often

•asking strange questions about the weather in the Devildom

•maybe MC was interested in what rain was like here?

•mc rushed to get back home, but it was when some distant thunder rolled across the sky when things turned odd.

•MC let out a small yelp, and then ran into the nearest closed door

•which was a closet

•although he would think it was cute, he suddenly realised what was going on

•he went to the closet and opened it to find MC had shoved themselves in the deepest corner of the room

•"MC, is everything alright?" He asked peeking in

•mc had their eyes closed tight and covered their ears

•a louder roll of thunder, MC flinched again

•lucifer frowned at the scene, it dawned on him that MC was scared of thunderstorms.

•he reached out his hand to mc

•"do you trust me?" He asked, mc slowly nodding and taking his hand

•He took MC out of the closet

•he covered Mc's ears tightly and lead them to Lucifer's room

•he set MC down, and then started a record.

•he raised the volume to a pleasing level, and then grabbed blankets.

•draped MC with the warm blankets, then went to sit next to MC.

•the first roll of thunder heard over the music MC flinched and Lucifer reached an arm around MC to bring them to his chest.

•he would stroke MCs hair

•"you should know that nothing will harm you, so long as I am with you"

•MC would be so calm they would fall asleep in Lucifers arms

💰Mammon💰

•Mammon and MC were prob just vibing at the house, ya know...

•A roll of thunder strikes, but Mammon pays no attention to it.

•MC however just froze.

•He noticed, "Oi, what's the matter with you?" Mammon would ask, a bit annoyed as usual.

•MC  tried to act cool, but hearing the thunder getting louder, and the flashing caused them to dive under the table.

•Mammon was big confused, looking under the table.

•"What? Don't tell me your afraid of a little thunder?" He would ask with a grin.

•when he saw MC cowarding under the table, he felt his heart drop, his grin would fade.

•he wanted to help, but didn't know how.

•ya boy just got under the table with MC and sat next ti them.

•"hey! Don't be afraid, with The Great Mammon(tm) beside you NOTHING stands a chance! Not even some silly thunder strikes."

•this would make MC laugh, and Mammon would have an idea

•mammon spent the time telling MC about his wild gambling adventures, how he would escape the 'evil witches', etc.

•by the time  Mammon was done telling his stories it was really late...most likely crashed in Mammons bed.

🎮Leviathan🎮

•Levi just wanted to show off his new purchase

•a figurine from his new guilty pleasure "I Went To The Kitchen To Eat A Snack, And Ate A Prince Who Had Been Turned Into A Sticky Bun. Now I Was Kiddnaped By The Royal Family And Now Am The Crown Prince Of This Dimension and Betrothed To A Beautiful Princess Who Hates Me." [Omg I hated that]

•he sent MC a Text to come to his room ASAP

• MC came pretty quickly, to his surprise.

•The first roll of thunder, Levi just got annoyed

•"It was not suppose to rain today." He complained, as he too does not like thunder storms.

•He turns to MC to see them just crouched down on the floor, ears covered and eyes  closed tight.

•he seems to recall a conversation they had with MC when they were trying to make him feel better about being nervous.

•he felt a pain in his heart, MC told him of their fear of thunder, but never believed  them.

• MC was so brave and strong, how could someone like that be scared of some loud noise?

•first, this boy panics

•It was about the 3rd or 4th roll of thunder that he had an idea

•He took his head phones, connected them to his PC, and started to play his favorite anime.

•he carefully placed the headphones over MC's ears and set them on the bed.

•he took a blanket and covered MC, then sat down and watched the anime with MC.

•he couldn't hear the anime, but he had seen it so many times he had it memorized.

•If the thunder could still be heard, MC got closer to Levi, which he didn't hate but...ya know

📚Satan📚

•He was tutoring MC when it happened, in the main hall.

•basically going over any questions MC had about the subject.

•at the first strike of Thunder, MC lost all focus and just used a book to cover their head.

•it was just a sudden reaction MC had, they knew this was silly, but it felt safe to them.

•Satan took pause, not really sure what brought this on all of a sudden.

•at the second strike, MC was now under the coffee table.

•Satan was smart, so he connected the dots pretty quickly.

•surprised someone like MC would be scared of something so trivial, but understanding none the less.

•he wants to continue studying, but cannot seem to lure MC out from under the table.

•he gets an idea, grabbing the blankets and pillows nearby

•the boy makes a pillow fort around MC

•"Fine, if you won't study up here, then we can study down here..." he says crawling in beside MC.

•brings pillows and blankets under the fort.

•MC was both comfortable and distracted from the thunderstorm

•did not take long before they were listening to audio books and getting cozy

•they both fell asleep cuddled next to each other

•Mammon big jealous

💕Asmodeus💕

•Fear is not an avenue that he often travels

•who could fear anything when an Adonis like him roamed the halls?

•MC stopped responding to his Devilchats, and he was feeling SUPER affectionate today.

•He would have skipped all the way down to MC's room and let himself in

•[all the brothers do this and it makes me heated 😤]

•"MC why are you ignoring me~♡" he would ask, but stop in his tracks when he saw MC in bed, completly covered by blankets and pillows.

•thinking this was a weird way of flirting, he sat on the bed and rubbed MC's back.

•when he felt MC was shaking, and hearing the fear in their tone made him think.

•was not until MC outright admitted they were scared of thunderstorms until Asmo [bless his heart] finally realized

•but, being the avatar of Lust, he had a better idea in mind.

•instead of MC being scared of thunderstorms, he would make them love thunderstorms

•[this is where it gets 🌟spicy🌟 so minors skip ahead]

•Asmo crawled under the blankets and cuddled with MC.

•if MC consented, then he would start kissing every part of MC's body

•which would lead to kissed on the mouth

•which would lead to making out

•which would lead to clothes being removed

•which would lead to....home run!

•Asmo would make it to whenever MC thought of thunderstorms, they would think of him

•which is...one way of handling a fear 🤣

🍔Beelzebub🍔

•it would happen when Beelz and MC were outdone a dinner date

•they both wanted to try this new Devildom all you could eat buffet

•Beelz would be the last to notice the thunderstorm.

•however he would quickly notice the change in MC's whole demeanor.

•Suddenly MC was not hungry and stiffened up.

•Even if he was more focused on eating, he could sense MC was scared...of what he didn't know.

•he wanted to continue eating, but he also didn't want to leave MC vulnerable.

•he decided to go and sit right next to MC.

•He leaned in close to MC

•"What's wrong? Is there someone scaring you? Does the food taste bad?" He asked

• MC wouldn't outright admit it at first

•"do you want to leave?" He asked, getting ready to hop out of the booth

•MC knew how much Beelz was looking forward to this, so they finally admitted that they in fact didn't want to leave, they didn't like thunderstorms

•It took the poor guy a second, but then he smiled ear to ear.

•"Oh, for a second there I thought you were having a horrible time."

• without much thought he took off his jacket and threw it around MC.

•how did his jacket smell like cookies? It was so warm too

• Beelz would throw his free arm around MC, the other was grabbing food

•"Okay, I liked this one...try a bite of this" he would say, now feeding MC tenderly.

•nothing is worse than being scared on an empty stomach!

•MC might even eat too much and start to doze off while Beelz was still nibbling

🥱Belphagor🥱

•imma be honest, he is smarter than he let's on

•there have been past thunderstorms Nd he had noticed MC acting strange at those times

•one night while Mc and Belphie were stargazing, it started to thunderstorm.

•What a way to ruin the mood

•now MC was flustered.

•evennif he was comfy, he got up and helped MC up.

•he would have escorted MC to their special attic space.

• crawled into the bed, and making sure that MC was extra comfortable.

•more pillows, more blankets, more covering and tucking.

•MC only protested when they had become a blanket burrito

•"Belphie, what are you doing?" Mc finally asked chuckling

•"Making you into the ultimate cuddle buddy. It's going to be a long night" he stated, now wrapping his limbs around MC, the blanket burrito

•MC laughed "I can't move!"

•"oh...you wanted to move?" He would ask, only shifting MC to one side to face him now

•"come on, what if I get hot?" Mc asked chuckling

•Belphie looked into MC's eyes

•"then I will happily undress you" he stated cuddling as close as he could "now...do you want to watch some Demontube?"

•knowing this would help MC fall asleep faster

•MC fell asleep peaceful, operation distract and replace worked

[gimyeongbestboy]

The Queen of Choson

Prologue

Summary: The lines that separates each classes in the caste system of Choson are hard and rigid. Despite this, one woman, endeavoured to cross these boundaries to prove that she is more than her status after her trust have been betrayed. She had learned to no longer trust those that choose to hide and to never trust anyone's promises. She later meets a man that would make her fall in love, but because of what happened in the past, she refused to act on her feelings-- afraid that he too, will betray her. In her revenge story, she learns of trust, love, friendship and loyalty.

an: I had intended to post the prologue and the first chapter together, but I'm having writer's block (if you will). I do have notes that have every event that would happen in the story, but detailing them is kinda hard. I will post chapter 1 either later today, or at night.

Chapter 1 ->

The students of Myeong Moon Science High are having a field day. They are currently out on a field trip and not stuck inside a classroom. Their class went to a museum that had a historical exhibit— displaying paintings, pottery, clothings, and weaponry. There are students that tried to read the poems written in hanja and tried to decipher them. There are those who chose to admire their reflection on the bronze mirror. However, among all the displayed artifacts, there is one specific painting that caught the eyes of Seong Chun Cha’s friend.

“Hey Chun Cha, come look at this! Come here quickly! Quickly!” Chun Cha’s friend had called her over to have her look at the painting. No matter what angle she looks at it, all she can see is the features of her friend.

“What is it?” Chun Cha questioned her friend, curious to what her friend could possibly have seen that she needed to see immediately. The moment she got there, Chun Cha’s friend grabbed her shoulder and had her stand beside the painting. Chun Cha’s friend looks back and forth between her and the painting she can’t see properly as it is placed beside her. She can not comprehend what got her friend so excited when all she can see is how flat the paper is and the thickness of the frame.

“Would you mind telling me what you’re looking at?”

“Oh. My. Gosh. You look just like her! The resemblance is way too uncanny.” Chun Cha’s friend said in surprise.

“I don’t really see the resemblance. Everyone can basically have black hair and dark eyes the way that woman does.” Chun Cha claimed after looking at the painting.

“Um, no, not just everyone. Chun Cha, you look just like the woman in this ‘The Wronged Yangban’ painting! You guys have the same eyes, same face, same everything! Oh my god! What if you’re her reincarnation? Do you think somewhere in this exhibition, there’s someone who looks like me as well? Should I go look? Yeah, I should! Look at that painting carefully Chun-cha! You will see that I’m right! You two really look the same.” Chun-cha’s friend rambled on because of this epiphany.

Looking at her retreating friend’s figure, Chun Cha chuckles to herself because of what her friend had just claimed. Chun Cha looked over the painting once more— again, and again. The longer she stares at it the more she sees what her friend is talking about. Reincarnation, huh? I doubt it. Their field trip ended and the claim Chun Cha’s friend made still lingers in her head.

When Chun Cha got home, she saw piles and piles of boxes placed everywhere in their house. The Seong family is getting ready to move out of their current house and move into a new home in a different city. Seeing that there was no one else at home, she went straight into her bedroom to change and start packing her own stuff. While packing, she remembered that they have an attic that she never went up in. Starting from under the light installed in the middle of the hallway, exactly five steps towards the end of the hall is the entrance to the attic. Exiting her room, she went to grab a ladder to hoist her up close to the ceiling of the hallway. Much to her surprise, the attic is clean and tidy. The wooden floor is nowhere near dusty and below the roof above have no cobwebs. Stored on one side of the attic, are boxes that keep Chun-cha’s old clothes, baby toys and garments, and her parents old things that they no longer use. On the other side of the attic is a wooden desk made from oak that seems to be calling out to her. On the desk are book piles, of old and new— varying in size and thickness. Some of those “books” are actually hard-covered notebooks in which the spine resembles a book’s, giving the mirage of an actual book. The older books are at the very bottom of the piles, are obviously bound using book binding threads, and the quality of the books become newer and newer as it reaches the top. The arrangement of the book piles almost resembles the time that had passed, from then, to now.

Chun Cha picked up the one at the very top of the pile and opened it. The words inside are obviously hand-written, and she recognizes it as her mothers penmanship. Each word on the pages is written in Hanja. Flipping through the pages, it seems to be a diary, but whose? Though it may have been her mother’s penmanship, she is most certain it isn’t her mother’s. First of all, it wouldn’t make sense for her mother to put a date from the 14th century. Second, her mother sucks at journaling. Picking up another book from the pile, she noticed that the same documentation is written on it, but this time, it was her grandmother’s writing. Chun Cha picked up the next three books on the pile and just like the previous ones she opened, it contains the same information as the previous two. Curiosity got the best of Chun Cha, and she started reading the texts that are documented on every page.

It was the beginning of autumn, when my love and I started to spend more time with each other. Because our love was secret, we both had to sneak out of our respective houses in order to meet with each other…

[szeherezadaa]

Bakugou HC

We know canonically Bakugou is a good pickpocket (chapter 219). Bakusquad learns about it (and some more) gradually.

(It turned out to be long af and drabble-ish, but it’s basically fluffy Bakusquad shenanigans with Bakugou being talented in yet another field.)

It starts with Kaminari who wants to mess with Bakugou a little. They’re studying in Bakugou’s room, but Kaminari is exhausted and wants a break, so he steals the pen Bakugou marks their mistakes with that is currently laying on the table — alone and unprotected, easy prey. Bakugou is distracted at the moment, he’s explaining something to Sero once again. Kaminari hides the pen in the pocket of his hoodie and shoots a smile at Ashido who’s also low-key dying and has asked for break at least three times already.

“Okay, Sparky, your turn,” Bakugou says and Kaminari slides him his worksheet on the table, and then finally looks at him with an innocent face-

-and sees Bakugou marking all of Kaminari’s errors with the exact same pen he did it all this time. Kaminari checks his pockets frantically, but they’re empty.

“Something’s wrong, Sparky?” Bakugou asks in a daring tone not even sparing him a glance. Kaminari just shakes his head, blurting out one nervous “no!”. It’s too nervous to pretend nothing happened, but Sero is too engrossed in correcting his mistakes and Kirishima looks like he’s fully focused on the textbook but while his body is here, his mind is probably fifty thousand miles away, so only Ashido actually notices.

She’s the next one to try to stea- to borrow something without asking from Blasty. She wants to see if it were Kaminari who messed up or if it’s the case of Bakugou being insanely good at something once again. Honestly, is there anything this guy can’t do? So, she decides to kill two birds with one stone. She has an agenda of stealing clothes from her boys to wear them, but she didn’t try to take Bakugou’s clothes yet. It’s a good opportunity to do so.

She sneaks into his room one day, right after school when barely anyone is back in the dorms yet; the excuse of organizing a movie night later at the tip of her tongue if for some reason Bakugou is already in his room. She’s lucky though, because when she enters his room, it’s empty. She opens his closet, pulls out a black hoodie with some band logo on it — it’s the softest one he has, she knows — and she’s about to put it on and leave, when the doors to Bakugou’s room open and Bakugou himself enters. She hides the hoodie behind her back.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Bakugou demands, opening the closet and pulling something out of it. Ashido laughs nervously and avoids looking him in the eye. In this brief second she did, she felt like his piercing gaze reached her soul. She starts to babble — how she was looking for him and about the movie night, it would be great if he joined them — while he goes to the bathroom to change from his school uniform. When he opens the bathroom doors, he’s wearing black hoodie with some band logo on it, the softest Bakugou owns.

Wait.

“Wha-” Ashido checks her hands and sees a dark red jacket she’s not sure she’s ever seen before.

“I’m not gonna be an easy target like Shitty Hair or Tape Face. If you want to have my hoodie, you have to put some fucking effort into it. Now get the fuck out of my room.”

Ashido leaves.

Kirishima and Sero know because Ashido barged into Kaminari’s room, when they were playing video games together. She tells them everything. Kirishima isn’t exactly surprised, his bro is amazing after all.

Kaminari decides they should test it. See if there is something they can steal from Bakugou and have him not notice it. Ashido agrees eagerly. Sero shrugs, says he will help if he can, but mostly will be there as a witness. And a reporter, kind of, with his phone always ready to snap a photo or record a video. Kirishima isn’t sure if it’s a good idea — mostly because stealing isn’t manly — but the rest convince him, arguing that they don’t actually want to steal anything from Bakugou, just tease him, mess with him a little- The point is they don’t have any malicious intent, just want to have some harmless fun and judging from Bakugou’s reaction when Ashido tried to steal his hoodie, he knows it and already treats it as a challenge. So yeah, Kirishima agrees in the end, sue him.

The problem is, Bakugou is insanely good at it. He notices every time and it’s almost scary — whenever one of them have their hands on something belonging to Bakugou and are ready to present it to the rest of the squad, it turns out he already pickpocketed it back. He’s quick, and subtle, and efficient, and although two of these things are normal for him, Bakugou being subtle is somewhat surreal. They don’t really give up, but they stop focusing on it. They try to gain the element of surprise back, so they have to stop for a while. Lull Bakugou into a false sense of security.

They are kinda taken aback though, when Bakugou uses his skills out of his own initiative instead of as a mean to get his stuff back.

They’re sitting in cafeteria during lunch break, and Kirishima gets a text that makes his face as red as his hair in a matter of a second. It doesn’t go unnoticed by his friends.

“Who are you texting? You’ve got a crush on someone? Did they agree to a date?” Ashido floods him with questions, her eyes sparkling with excitement. Kaminari and Sero join the teasing, so Kirishima blurts out hurriedly:

“No! My mom was cleaning our attic and found a photo album from my childhood. She just sent me an embarrassing photo.” He hopes it will calm them down. He forgets one thing.

“Show me!”

“C’mon dude!”

His friends are a pain in the ass, all of them.

“No way!” he screams and tries to keep his phone out of his friends’ reach. He picks up his bag, hides his phone inside, zips the bag and holds it close, as if it was his most precious possession. It kind of is in this particular moment.

“Please, bro. I swear I won’t laugh.”

Kirishima knows it’s a lie. He refuses, stares down at Ashido and Kaminari and Sero (the traitor. Kirishima didn’t expect anything else from Ashido and Kaminari, but Sero? He trusted him) and refuses to give in to their puppy eyes. It’s tough, he’s gotta admit it. And then…. And then he hears Bakugou’s voice.

“I thought it would be something more scandalous given your reaction, Shitty Hair.”

No. He didn’t.

Except he absolutely did.

Kirishima glances, panicked, at Bakugou holding Kirishima’s phone in his hand.

“It’s not that bad, don’t be a pussy.” Bakugou rolls his eyes and puts Kirishima’s phone on the table - closest to Kirishima but not out of Kaminari’s reach. Kirishima sees this little smirk on Bakugou’s face that Bakugou always wears when they manage to convince him to some shenanigans he won’t admit out loud he enjoyed. Kirishima knows Bakugou will use his skills more often, now.

They created a monster.

Luckily Bakugou doesn’t really use his powers for evil. Well, he doesn’t use it for evil on Sero, just on Kaminari, Ashido and sometimes Kirishima, and for Sero it’s enough actually. The number of times it happened doesn’t mean they know everything about his skills though, Sero discovers one day. It should be obvious in hindsight, but Bakugou has this weird talent where whatever he does, whatever new thing you get to know about him, you’re both surprised and not at all, at the same time.

They’re doing groceries together, and they’re getting back to the dorms already, when a villain attack happens. The villain in question isn’t really strong, luckily, but has some weird teleporting quirk that moves random people to random places. They help the hero who arrived at the scene and once the villain is arrested, the hero asks them to stay here a bit longer and help people who weren’t hit with the teleporting quirk find their friends and family. More specifically help some kids, who can’t find their parents now. More specifically Sero and Bakugou are supposed to babysit the kids until the hero and his sidekicks find the missing parents.

Sero sees Bakugou frown but he doesn’t argue. Sero knows kids aren’t exactly Bakugou’s forte, especially not crying kids, so he tries his best to calm them down quickly. It’s not that easy. Sero sees Bakugou’s hand sparkle with mini-explosions. It doesn’t really calm the kids down either.

Finally, Bakugou snaps and points at a little girl with a witch hat on her head and a dark blue cape with yellow stars on it on her shoulders.

“Will you shut up if I show you a magic trick?”

The girl doesn’t look even a little bit calmer, but she hesitantly nods her head nonetheless, her lips still trembling and tears still streaming down her cheeks. Bakugou’s roar, although scaring some kids more (or, like, again; Sero actually made them stop crying and it’s all for nothing now, thanks Bakugou), brings all the kids’ attention to Bakugou. He kneels on the ground and shows his little audience that his hands are empty, then proceeds to pull a coin out off the witch girl’s ear. He shows the coin to all the kids, rotates it holding it with his index finger and his thumb, then closes his palm into a fist. When he opens his palm once again, there are two coins — between his index and middle finger, and between his middle and ring finger. He closes his palm into a fist one more time, and when he opens it, it’s empty again. The kids gasp.

“Your other hand!” one kid exclaims.

“Clever little shit,” Bakugou grins, “You thought you’re so smart, huh? Well, not this time.” He shows the other hand too; both are equally empty.

“Once more!” one kid demands.

“Once more!” the Clever Little Shit agrees.

“Once more! Once more!” the witch girl starts to chant. Other kids join her.

“Fine,” Bakugou says, then pulls out the coin again. He moves it on his fingers, throws it in the air, then catches it in his fist. Once he opens his palm, there are three coins, all between his fingers, minus his thumb. He closes his fist again and once he opens it, it’s empty once more. He looks at all the kids, then at Sero.

“Yo, Tape Face, check your pocket.”

There’s no way, is there?

Sero swears if there are coins in his pocket, he’ll start Bakugou’s fanclub. He’ll build him a shrine, because apparently Bakugou’s not entirely human.

His pockets are empty. Kids moan with disappointment (and to be honest Sero doesn’t know himself if he’s more disappointed or relieved he doesn’t have to build the shrine after all), but Bakugou’s not deterred.

“Well, then maybe you check under your hat, brat,” he addresses the witch girl. She looks at him with doubt but also with hope and takes her hat off.

A dozen of coins fall to the ground. Kids scream — excited, full of awe. Bakugou gathers all the coins from the ground, closes them in both of his cupped hands and shakes them.

“Blow,” he says to the Clever Little Shit. Clever Little Shit does as he’s told and Bakugou opens his palms. There are candies in his palms, the ones that Hagakure likes and of which they got three packages earlier, because she asked. Kids squeal, gather around Bakugou, each takes one candy and there is just excited chatter, no wails for lost parents anymore. Bakugou shows one more magic trick before the hero and his sidekicks appear with the kids’ parents.

The police takes Sero and Bakugou to leave their testimonies, and they’re finally free to go.

“So. Magic tricks,” Sero starts, once they’re on their way to dorms again.

“Shut up.”

“No, dude, wait! It was so cool! You should do it more often.”

Bakugou only grunts something that sounds like “fuck off, I’ll do what I want”. Sero knows Bakugou’s just abashed, because there wasn’t any of his usual bite. He smiles.

He has to tell the rest of the Bakusquad all about it.

Their class gets to know how skilled Bakugou is when one evening they’re all sitting in the common room and Bakugou wants to go to sleep but his friends want him to stay for a movie night. Or, at least one movie. They all deserve a break after a long week full of surprise quizzes! The rest of the class tries to respectfully convince him too, some tell him to “live a little” but before Iida, as the responsible class prez he is, manages to tell everyone that they should respect Bakugou’s opinion instead of flooding him with silly reasonings, Bakugou pulls out a sheet of paper, writes “all the fucks I give” on it, shows it to the whole class (they’re all quiet now, curious what he’ll do, although half sure he will just explode it), then proceeds to make it disappear in a true illusionist fashion.

Some of their classmates lose their shit, some stare in awe, some in shock. Midoriya smiles this soft smile of his, with stars sparkling in his eyes.

[mageofseven]

How about the brothers reacting to MC approaching them for romantic advice...but they’re interested in a different brother? Extra knife twisting points if MC and the brother they were interested in start dating not long after

Okay ouch lol well, coming right up!

~

Lucifer:

Out of all of his brothers they could have came to him for love advice for, it had to be the one who technically is more than that and the one he has the most complicated relationship with.

He was very offend by this and coldly told MC that he had no advice to give in order to attract Satan.

It didn't matter though. By the end of the week, Satan was the one who had asked the human out.

The older brother was a bit bitter, but hid it by putting even more focus on his work, something no one thought possible. People rarely saw the man outside of his study after that, except for classes at RAD and whenever Lord Diavolo needed him in the Student Council room or at the Castle.

His pride was scratched, but he got over it after a day or two.

The two could cuddle on the couch and have study dates all they wanted; it didn't concern the oldest anymore.

...it was fine, as long as they're happy together.

Mammon:

Wait him?? Out of all of his brothers, MC chose the one who didn't even like to leave his room over The Great Mammon??

Boy plays it off like he's offended, but honestly... he's just really hurt by this. I mean, he's liked them basically since Day One, but they still fell for the otaku before him?

He just felt so deflated, but didn't want them to know that.

Of course, he helps his Human just like he always does.

Tells them that if they want Levi to got out with them, they gotta be direct and blunt and all that jazz or that hikikomori just won't get it.

"Waddya mean? Of course he'll say yes!" He tells them when they start to worry. "If he has even one brain cell in that thick head of his, he'll say yes right away!"

When MC finally had the confidence to do it, they asked Levi out when he invited her to his room to see the new game he got from Akuzon.

When the two came out later that day, the whole household learned they were dating.

Yeah, it stung the second brother... but if his Human is happy, that's all that matters, right?

Leviathan:

...and what made them think he had any advice for them?

This boy isn't good at anything social and love advice was far from his specialty

So asking for advice on how to win over his scummy brother? Yeah, that just locked him into self-loathing mode.

Ends up telling them that it's been very obvious to everyone else in the Devildom that Mammon fell hard for them a long time ago and honestly, they're playing on easy mode.

MC goes straight to Mammon's room after that and Levi can hear him scream "What?!?!!" from his own room.

And just like that, the second born was all smiley and living his best day because the human asked him out.

The otaku doesn't leave his room for the next couple days, not even for dinner and does his school work online.

Heartbroken, but tells himself that he shouldn't have expected any other outcome.

Satan:

Are they trying to make him mad?

MC, coming to him of all people, to ask how to attract Lucifer?

They explain it's because he's their closest friend and, despite the rocky relationship he has with the Avatar of Pride, they trust that they will help them.

Satan took a deep breath. Out all of the people they could have picked over him, it had to be Lucifer, he thought bitterly.

He had to excuse himself without answering the human.

The fourth born later noticed how his actions hurt his friend and sighed. He brought them to the library and sat them down on the couch in there.

He gave them tips like Lucifer's favorite tea type and information about his schedule. He told her to get the tea, make it around noon tomorrow and bring it to his study since that's usually the time he takes a break and gets the tea himself. Then ask if they can join him for a bit and during small talk, simply bring up the topic of going out sometime.

The blonde was really tempted to use all of this to his own gain, to lead the situation in a way to punish the oldest for taking his human from him but... this was obviously important to MC so he held back for their sake.

The next day, they came running to the blonde, all excited, saying it worked and that they and Lucifer had a dinner date tomorrow night. Satan smiled bitterly, but congratulated them before heading back to his room.

The Avatar of Wrath felt as if... anything important to him will always be stolen by that man. But at least MC was happy.

Asmodeus:

Boy is disappointed, no lies here.

I mean how could they not fall for him??

Still, he finds the idea of playing matchmaker so fun~

So what if it's with Satan? He's sure he can figure something out!

The Avatar of Lust immediately texted the fourth brother, saying it's an emergency and MC need him to come the fifth brother's room now.

He doesn't tell MC this however and just continues the conversation and asks what they see in the Avatar of Wrath.

They list off things like his intelligence, the kindness they've seen in him since becoming friends, his cute smile, how he just makes them feel so warm and safe and happy any time he hangs out with them.

"Aww that's so sweet!" Asmo tells them. "And that's why you wanna ask him out?"

"I mean, yeah, it's some of it." The human mumbled.

Asmo smiled, nodding to them before adding.

"Okay! Now why don't you open the door?"

"Huh?" The human gives a confused look before walking to the door and opening it like they were told, revealing a blushing Satan.

"A-Asmo!" MC turns to yell at the other demon, but just gets pushed out into the hallway by him.

"Have fun, sweetie~"

The fifth brother knew within the hour that the two were dating.

He'll admit, there's a bit of sadness in his heart about it, but he's glad he was able to help the to get together and be happy.

Beelzebub:

Poor baby is disappointed, but is glad that the brother they're interested in his twin.

Please make him happy :(

Served as kind of a messenger between the two, trying to find out how Belphie felt about them.

The Avatar of Sloth isn't one to be direct about that sort of thing, even with his twin.

Takes a few days of not so subtle questions for Beel to get an idea about how the younger one felt.

Belphie knew what his brother was doing; question was why.

Learned that his brother does like MC, but felt too much guilt over the Incident™️ to actually do anything with his feelings.

Texted MC about what he said and invited them to his room.

The three essentially had a big therapy session for the youngest brother and by the end of it, the Avatar of Sloth was able to forgive himself just enough to accept MC's feelings and his own.

He's really glad that his brother feels happier, even if his own heart aches a little.

Belphegor:

Ngl, their words stung.

Not that the Avatar of Sloth thought he deserved them after what happened, but still.

He's glad that it's Beel they like though.

The younger twin already knows that his brother liked them so it was all simple really.

Told them to literally walk right up to the big guy and say they like him, but MC said that was too embarrassing.

Ends up texting Beel to come to the attic. As soon as he entered the room, the younger brother says

"MC has a crush on you. Now let me sleep." Before falling back to his pillow.

"Belphie!"

The human's face was so red.

They turned to apologize to the redhead, just to be engulfed into a hug.

Beel was smiling ear to ear.

The younger twin was right; it really was that simple.

Kind of a bittersweet feeling to him, but it's whatever...

[shadeswift99]

Team ZIT Ghostbusters AU!

Discord ideas. Of course they’re discord ideas. (paraphrased from a Discord discussion)

-  Zedaph is the one who started the ghostbusting crew. Impulse is the one who went along with it because his normal job is boring and he's had haunt-y experiences before that he wants to confirm were real. Tango is the guy who didn't believe at all but they dragged him along because he's the only one with a car

- Tango keeps somehow missing any and all real ghost encounters (”Come on man, you HAD to have seen that!” “I was in the bathroom!”)

- The few ghost encounters he actually has. he still manages to excuse as something else for a really long time (”Jerk in a costume” “Weather balloon” “Firework show gone wrong” “Hallucination” “Water reflection”, etc.)

- He eventually has to admit that ghosts are real, but he keeps up the bit with the others because he thinks it’s funny

- the others start to wonder why he’s so dedicated to convincing them that ghosts aren’t real in spite of their very real encounters. They start to wonder if Tango himself is a ghost

- He is not. Hilarity ensues

- Zed and Impulse start setting ghost traps around the office, but the ever-oblivious Tango keeps accidentally avoiding them. Zed and Impulse then activate them themselves while looking for flaws in the design.

-  About two thirds of their calls are just old people who are freaked out and kinda lonely, they're good at reassuring them and "thoroughly checking" for any “ghosts” to put them at ease

-  Beetlejhost was one of these calls, it was supposed to be nothing! They were convinced it was nothing! And it was nothing, until Tango and Impulse went into the hall for their customary "check" and got insulted up and down by a nerd-looking guy in a striped suit.They like to think they let him come with them, but really, he just wouldn't leave. He is Weirdly resistant to all their ghostbusting measures

- Eventually they just stop trying to get rid of him

-  Zed and impulse eventually ask him if Tango is a ghost, he gives an incredibly cryptic answer that those two interpret as a yes

-  The eventual confrontation about Tango's theoretical ghost-ness starts out ridiculous, but gets more serious. Impulse and Zedaph start listing the reasons why they think he's a ghost - he's weirdly insistent that ghosts aren't real, he hasn't told them anything about his life, they never really see him arrive or leave from the office...eventually Tango kind of snaps and shouts at them that he's not a ghost! He just doesn't have many other places to go, okay? They don't bring it up again

-  However. There are a few weird things around the office that they cite as evidence that Tango can't explain. He didn't open that door that they always leave closed. He couldn't have boiled water in the kettle that's been broken for six months. He isn't the reason why their reflection in every mirror is wearing a different facial expression than they are.

- They would suspect the Beetlejhost, but the strangeness started long before he got there

-  They bought the office for cheap because nobody else would buy it. The story is that the landlord was murdered there a decade ago, and he still hasn't left the place, making sure all of the new tenants are treating it well and punishing them if they don't. The three didn't really put much stock in that. It's a myth, right? Urban legend. Happens all the time. Surely the ripped and slightly bloodied vest they found in the attic has a perfectly reasonable and natural explanation.

- Honestly, their resident ghost buddies (both known and unknown) are probably the only reason they haven’t been attacked by ghosts in their own office yet. As annoying as they can be, they make pretty good protection from incorporeal intruders.

- “Ghosts try to fuck with them and are met with a ripped dude and a nerd in a suit, both looking quite angry”

-  They only really realize that the Beetlejhost isn't the only ghostly officemate when large amounts of their post-mission pizza start disappearing

-  Impulse starts "accidentally" leaving things out just to see what happens to them. He leaves out a Rubix cube to see if it's solved by the morning. It isn't, but it has been thrown out the window.

-  Skizz has never had to learn how to physically appear before. He's never really wanted to. The living world kind of screwed him over, so he doesn't feel like he owes them anything other than ominously lurking just beyond the mortal plane. However, to these people, he kind of thinks he might want to make himself known. They seem...okay. Ish. Maybe. No promises.

- Maybe at first, he just talks (suddenly, in the middle of the night, in a way that just about gives Impulse a heart attack of course)

- Eventually, the Beetlejhost teaches him how to make himself visible. (Of course he knew Skizz was there the whole time)

-  He still mostly keeps to himself - not used to being friendly yet - but when he does choose to show up to team game night, an extra bit of company is always welcome. (plus it's someone to keep the Beetlejhost from cheating by phasing through the table and looking at the cards)

-  Beetlejhost comes with them on missions, but Skizz is more or less bound to the building

-  The Beetlejhost usually just sings and/or laughs at them, but he's gotten them out of a good few tight spots on occasion with Ghost Negotiations. After all, he doesn’t really want them to get hurt

-  As distant and mischievous as Skizz can be, really, he doesn't want them to get hurt either. They take good care of the building and they're the first real friends he's had in 15 years so why would he want them gone? So, he does his part to help them whenever he can

-  One time one of the more dangerous ghosts decided that possessing Impulse was a good idea. They subdued him and took him back to the office to figure out what to do with him, but they didn't have to. Skizz basically just yelled at the ghost until it left.

- Speaking of possessed, Tango has a strange talent for coming under the control of ghostly forces. Usually it’s pretty easy to get the ghost to leave, though, so it’s okay - and hey, at least it left him with some nifty red eyes!

- And yes, Tango does get possessed when he still thinks ghosts aren’t real. And no, that does not convince him.

- He has to wear sunglasses sometimes so they don’t get kicked out of places, but he usually just lets the eyes show and becomes the most badass person in the Walmart

- Zedaph and Tango try to ask Skizz how he died sometimes. It’s a bit of a touchy subject, but of course he chooses humour instead of just saying that. Zed and Tango continue to insist that “saw your mom’s face and died from shock and horror” isn’t a valid death explaination

- Skizz doesn’t want to talk about his death because he was killed by someone he trusted. A "friend" did something bad and wanted to use Skizz's place to hide from the cops, but Skizz didn't agree and didn't want that on his hands. He tried to convince the friend that if he turned himself in he would get a lighter sentence, but the friend killed him in anger. Notice how I said earlier that the crew are the first real friends he's had in 15 years, but he's only been dead for 10

-  Skizz isn't really interested in getting that person caught, he just wants to make sure nobody uses his place for bad stuff after he died. That’s his unfinished business.

-  Of course, the crew sometimes gets called in to take care of things that are not, in fact, ghosts, to varying results. One time a guy (whose name might have been Mumbo) called them in to ghost-vacuum his living roommate (who might be called Grian) who was just being annoying. They didn’t, of course, but only because Impulse said it would be wrong. Their other roommate (Iskall) gave them a tip and apologized for his idiot besties

- While they didn't vacuum Grian, Zed and Tango are still curious about what happens if they vacuum a living person

- Tango now has to figure out how to delicately and calmly phrase "Skizz please help oh god Zed's soul is stuck in the vacuum cleaner"

Please feel free to send me questions, I am enjoying this way more than I should be :)

[ttorystory]

Mare of Easttown 1x05 Fix it Fic

tv show: Mare of Easttown

pairing: Colin Zabel x Mare Sheehan

spoilers: ep 5 - Illusions

summary: No one except the bad motherf*cker gets killed because we live in a happier world where killing Evan Peter's adorable character is illegal. We can hurt him a lil' bit though. Because we like to suffer-- or at least I do. I'm so sorry. But it's for the bOnDinG reasons, you know.

warnings: shooting, blood, swearing, Colin's cute smile

word count: 1,086

A/N: OH MY GOD, IT'S HAPPENING. I've written my first ever fanfic in English. So it's like, elementary school level of English for which I apologize in advance. BUT I strongly encourage you to let me know about any and every one of my mistakes so I can fix them right away! It'll get better in the next chapters, I promise (I hope). Yes, I do plan a few more chapters. I mean, this is really just a short one, because I wanted to write an ending that episode should have had. But I wanna see Mare visiting Colin in hospital. I wanna see their second date. I wanna see Colin having the future he deserves.

Okay, so that would be all from me for now. If you decide to comment, whether in a positive or a negative way, I will be very grateful. Thank you and enjoy the fic.

“Mare.”

She turns her head towards the quiet call and glances over the table. In a pile of unwashed mugs and other garbage, there is an ashtray full of cigarette butts, and a half-empty pack.

Winstons.

This place is stinking from the very start and her suspicion is growing with every passing second.

“Zabel,” she whispers, reaching to her belt and reminding him there is nothing there, as she is officially still suspended. “No gun.”

It is a signal that it is he who has to be prepared if anything goes down with the odd guy. Her gaze follows the direction he’d gone, awaiting the music to stop. But her colleague quietly addresses her again.

“Mare.”

His hand outstretched, he is handing her his gun. Mare hesitates for a second, but there isn’t much time to discuss the topic, so she just takes it and hides it under her jacket quickly.

Besides, Mare knows it is a good move. She trusts Zabel and she knows he is capable, but he doesn’t have that much experience. God knows if he ever actually used the gun out in the field before. In some situations, it’s either you or the other man, and if you wanna survive you have to act quickly. And this situation? She has a bad fucking feeling about it.

Her intuition is proven right when only minutes later the bastard, Mr. Potts, shoots Zabel. He would have killed him on the spot if she didn’t shoot the man at the exact same time, diverting the bullet.

After a few endless minutes of shooting and fighting, Potts finally drops dead. Mare sinks down to her knees, panting. Those poor girls are screaming upstairs but she knows they can wait a little longer, now there is nothing to cause them any more harm. There is a person though who needs more acute help.

“Zabel!”

Her colleague is half lying on the floor, half leaning on a cupboard, squeezing his left shoulder and shaking. Mare hurries to him, taking her jacket off so she can cover him partially.

“Zabel, it’s over. Help's on the way, okay?”

She takes off her shirt as well and tries to tie it around his shoulder somehow so that the wound would stop bleeding. Zabel groans in pain but holds still.

“You’re hurt,” he says softly, panting.

Mare gives her bleeding wrist a quick look. The adrenaline running in her veins caused her to forget the injury. There is probably some small wound on her face as well, but it is nothing compared to the risk Zabel is exposed to at the moment.

“Yeah, well, you’re more hurt. Keep the pressure here,” she says, pressing his palm onto the coverage of the wound. The bleeding seems bad, but the bullet didn't hit any important organ. The police and ambulance will be here in no time. He should be fine. He has to be.

“I knew why-- why I was giving you-- the gun,” Zabel continues through the pain, his eyes looking and their hands pressed on his shoulder.

“Well, there’s gonna be a shitload of paperwork about this mess,” she smirks gloomily. Two officers - one of them off duty - injured, one dead weirdo, two missing girls being held in the attic. Mare brushes some hair away from her face, checking if there is blood on her fingers. This might be the first time she is kinda glad she is suspended.

“Mare, you-- you saved--”

Even though trying to say something, Zabel’s head starts falling to a side as his eyes are slowly about to close. Mare grabs him by the chin immediately.

“Hey, hey, eyes up! Stay with me, Zabel! The ambulance is here in a minute!” she orders, the tone of her voice urgent, while still holding his chin and trying to keep his gaze focused on her face.

A smile appears on the young man’s face.

“‘course I wanna stay with you… Mare.”

She has to stop herself from rolling her eyes in disbelief. “You’re being smooth now?”

That adorable, boy-like smile of his. Giving it to her even while basically fighting the loss of consciousness. What a dumbo. Her lips curl into a faint smile, too.

Glancing away, Mare realizes that girls who had been silent for a while are making hell of a noise again. And she knows why right away - there are police and ambulance sirens roaring nearby, approaching them finally.

Mare moves herself closer to the door so she can kick it more open. Swiftly she returns back to her colleague, whose head and hand are falling, obviously tired, again.

“They’re here, Zabel. You gotta hold on,” she urges him, one hand pressed on his wound, the other slapping his face slightly. She can hear several vehicles stopping outside of the house.

“Look at me, Zabel. Zabel! Colin!”

He mumbles something right just as the police officers and paramedics burst inside and the room around Mare starts to fill up.

Someone helps her to her feet, other people are taking care of Colin. She hears names and ranks, she tells them theirs, and then they are taking her outside, but she has one more important thing to say.

“There’re girls... they’re locked upstairs!” she shouts to the officers, turning backward partially. “Katie! Katie Bailey and…”

“That’s okay, ma’am, they’ll look into it,” a paramedic assures her, as he is guiding her to the ambulance. Mare sees Colin lying on the medical stretches, being taken to the vehicle alongside her.

“You okay?” she asks when he is next to her, even though he is lying with an oxygen mask over his face and eyes barely opened. She looks at the other paramedic. “Will he be fine?”

“I believe so, yes.”

“Don’t you fucking dare dying, Zabel!” she says warningly. She thinks she hears him murmur an answer and it calms her down a bit. He just can’t die. He won’t.

She sits where the paramedic tells her to and she lets him treat injuries, not listening to what he is saying to her.

People around her should stop fucking dying.

“Maybe you should lie down?” the man suggests.

“I’m fine.���

He’ll be fine as well. He has to be. They’ll take care of his shoulder and he’ll get through it.

She spots an officer coming up to her. She knows her, it’s Sergeant Diane Gibbson from this district.

Fuck, she’ll even go on another date with him if he asks.

Sergeant nods in greeting.

“Mare.”

[draconicfaenerd]

Obey Me Theory: In Which God is an Asshole and Solomon Might be a Good Guy?

Okay, here’s the deal. I have way too much time on my hands at the moment and was suddenly struck with inspiration, so I decided to cook up a little theory of my own.

Well, not so little. I’ve been writing this over the last few days, and this turned into something bigger than I was expecting.

Alright, here we go.

One of the great mysteries of this game: who the fuck wrote the whole Tale of the Seven Lords series? I mean, it foreshadows so much of the game’s plot twists that it’s absolutely insane! My initial thought was that Barbatos wrote it, especially since he’s the one who has a bunch of time travel/timeline powers that are, frankly, quite frightening. However, this theory leaves one gaping plot hole: how does Simeon know what’s gonna happen in the upcoming volume? Even Mammon and Satan take note of the fact that they have no idea why Simeon would know something like that. Who besides Barbatos could possibly have the power to see the future? Given this game’s penchant for foreshadowing, this is undoubtedly an important question we need to ask ourselves.

And I’d like to make you think about something as you answer that question.

While we know a fair bit about Barbatos’s power, we know practically nothing about the angels’ powers. Surely it doesn’t make sense that the demons have access to this wild reality-bending power that the angels don’t. Unless they actually do. How is this possible? Well, I turn to my knowledge of Christianity for this part of the theory.

According to many people’s interpretation of Judaism and Christianity, God is supposed to be an all-powerful, all-knowing, all-seeing entity. He knows anything and everything that has happened, is happening, and can/will happen in the future. Additionally, He can set everything up so that events happen according to His plan. Pretty difficult to go up against, right? Now, granted, we don’t know a lot about the game’s interpretation of God (yet); there are enough twists on Biblical canon that it is difficult to determine what direction this is going to go in. However, I do expect that God is supposed to be a ridiculously powerful character in-game; maybe as powerful as (or even more so than) Barbatos.

Side note: However, he is not all-powerful, and here’s how I know: he wasn’t able to just erase Lilith. Yes, I’m sure he was powerful enough to kill her, but not so powerful that he could just kill her immediately free of consequences.

But more on this later; now back to my original point. God is the author of TSL. Or, at the very least, is the divine inspiration behind it (where one of the angels or a specifically chosen human is the one to transcribe it). This explains why an angel such as Simeon would have knowledge of the upcoming plot. Another piece of evidence to back up my point: exposure to divinity. One point that pops up a few times in the Bible is the idea that anyone/anything who comes too close to God’s presence directly will perish. A couple of examples of this are the burning bush that Moses faces and the Ark of the Covenant which the Israelites are forbidden to touch. Now, you may be wondering what these examples have to do with Obey Me. The answer is simple: the TSL soundtrack. Remember why Lucifer was so interested in this soundtrack in the first place?

First off, a scene where the Lord of Corruption places a curse on the heroes? I have a few thoughts on that, but I’ll get to that in a little bit. What I’d like to focus on is the mysterious composer and the people who die surrounding the soundtrack. Lucifer tells us on our final night in the Devildom that the record isn’t actually cursed:

But. Well. I don’t trust that. He’s (probably) not purposefully lying to us, but I don’t think this can be a coincidence. I think that TSL was divinely inspired (along with its soundtrack) and for some reason, this particular soundtrack was too much for ordinary humans to handle (we know that MC isn’t ordinary because of their amount of hidden power that has been discussed; more on that later.) 

So I’d like to bring up something else. Propaganda.

God has already spread copious amounts of propaganda about the brothers. Why do I say this? Well, I’m going off the assumption that the human world MC comes from is pretty similar to the human world that all of you readers (and me, obviously) live in. Why does this matter? Religious texts. There’s no denying that Judaism/Christian and their respective texts have greatly influenced the course of world history. Which means, in canon, those same texts no doubt exist in the Human Realm. Now, assuming they were “divinely inspired” (another assumption, but one that seems to make sense to me), a plethora of lies were told. First of all, many of these texts paint Lucifer (the Morningstar) as: the original Fallen Angel, The Devil, the Prince of Hell, and the reason why Sin and Death entered the world (meaning he was the one who tempted Eve). In Obey Me canon, Lucifer was the leader of the rebellion, yes, but he is very different from how he would be painted in Biblical texts. First of all, the Devildom was around for a very long time before the Fall (leading to questions on the true power of the realms, but more on that later). Furthermore, Diavolo and the Demon King are more of what we consider to be “the Devil”; sketchy motives aside (which I’ve discussed in other posts), they are the ones that have the final say in the Devildom’s affairs. Not Lucifer. Yes, the brothers might hold the titles and responsibilities of being the “Seven Rulers of Hell,” but ultimately their will is overridden by Diavolo’s. Additionally, I’d like to talk about that last point: sin and death. In the Bible, Lucifer brought sin and death into the world by tempting Eve to eat the fruit from the forbidden tree. However, in Obey Me canon, we know this is not the case; death existed long before the Fall. We know this because Lilith’s human lover was going to die, hence why she fed him forbidden food from the Celestial Realm. Then, God was going to have her erased and ultimately sparked the Rebellion against Him.

So. We know that God is plenty willing to pin plenty of shit on Lucifer. But other than causing an abnormal amount of daddy issues, what does this have to do with anything? Well, remember how I noted earlier with the TSL soundtrack that it was supposed to be used in a scene where the Lord of Corruption placed a curse on the heroes? Well, the Lord of Corruption represents Lucifer. So, given the game’s penchant for foreshadowing, it seems like Lucifer is going to place a curse on the heroes (forgive me for making yet another assumption, but I interpret MC and the brothers as the heroes). Given Lucifer’s love for his family (and later MC), this doesn’t really make any sense. My initial thought was that the whole attic debacle was the curse, but that doesn’t really make sense either. But. Remember what I just said about God pinning shit on Lucifer. What if God is the one planning to put a curse on the heroes? Just think about that for a bit, let it sink in.

Now, why would God place a curse on the heroes? We know that He and the angels were able to defeat the brothers before, so they could do so again if the need ever arose, right? And why place a curse on MC, an ordinary human?

Well, not-so-ordinary human.

Remember why Asmo made a pact with MC in the first place? Solomon talks to us about how everyone has magical power within them, and it manifests itself in some, but not in others (this is already suspicious as fuck to me that a power as strong as MC’s wouldn’t manifest itself, but our in-game knowledge of magic is vague enough that I’m not really gonna dance around that right now). Anyways, MC gets stuck with Mammon, Beel, and Levi in the underground labyrinth again, and they summon Asmo and draw out even more power than Solomon can. Pretty strange, right? Belphegor also alludes to MC’s great power with his whole “you have the power to control demons” speech.

So basically we have this incredible power. And, if I’m on the right track here, then we’re a threat to God. As I explain here, Lilith is the reason we were chosen for the exchange program in the first place. Additionally, when you meet her as you’re dying and you reply to her and ask her what she’s doing, she says this:

So… there’s a lot going on in her whole dialogue. Really. There’s so much to dissect. And frankly, I don’t think I can dissect it all. So for now, I’m going to focus on the snippets that stood out to me. “I’ve been waiting for so long, you see. I’ve been waiting for you to come find me.” Um, what? First of all, Lilith’s spirit has been around for several thousands of years, right? Granted, the Obey Me timeline isn’t super clear, but still. Even if Lilith has been waiting around for MC ever since their birth, MC is however old the player is (probably late teens or in their twenties since that’s the demographic the game is geared towards); but even if MC is supposed to be way older than that, their lifespan is a very short time compared to Lilith’s existence. Unless. Unless Lilith has been waiting for longer than MC is supposed to be alive. Unless Lilith knew that someone as powerful as MC would come into existence and… do whatever it is Lilith wants us to do. Still not completely sure about that. (Also take note that Lilith never tells us herself that MC is her descendant; make of that what you will).

Also, she says that she’s worried about all her brothers and tells us to “save them” and that she’ll “lend us her powers.” So at first, I thought she was worried about them emotionally, and that she wanted us to save them by serving as emotional support for them. But we didn’t need her for our consciousness to transfer, and Barbatos took care of our alternate self. So what did we need her power boost for? The answer: something that’s coming up in the future. What exactly? I’m not completely sure. But, I do know that Solomon has an idea of what it is, based on the text conversation with him right after leaving the Devildom.

Now, is it possible Solomon knows because of his pact with Barbatos? Yes, it absolutely is. I know that I’ve said time and time again that Solomon’s pact with Barbatos is going to prove to be crucial in future chapters, and I still firmly believe that. However, if something is happening on the Celestial Realm side of things, Solomon has a connection there which would allow him to know the goings-on.

So for those of you who grew up in religious families, you probably remember a little bit about King Solomon; the “man after God’s own heart” (different translations may say something slightly different, but that’s the version most of us probably heard) who, when he had the chance to ask for one gift from God, chose to ask for wisdom. Now, many clues in-game point to show that there’s a good chance that this Solomon is supposed to be that very same guy. Such clues include his mystical powers and his many pacts, particularly his pact with Asmodeus. Now, remember when Solomon told us near the beginning of the game about the Ring of Wisdom he received? He never tells us about the mystery person who gave it to him, but I personally think he received it from God; since in Biblical canon God “gave him wisdom.” Additionally, remember how he talked about getting drunk off its power at first? That piece of information coincides with my earlier point about how exposure to divinity is difficult for humans to handle.

Also, remember that Solomon is a VERY big fan of TSL. (Enough to impress Levi, and enough that he has that super-rare pendant of the Lord of Corruption’s wing). So, given that God is probably the one behind the creation of this series, it stands to reason that his connection to God has something to do with this.

Additionally, while on the topic of Solomon, there is yet another chat (the one that he sends you on your birthday) that shows that he seems to be well aware of something that you, the player, are not:

As I’ve said before, this game really loves its foreshadowing. So, we’re definitely gonna have to save Solomon at some point: now, I know I’ve called him shady many times before, and he really truly is. But.

Maybe he’s not nearly as evil as I originally thought. He has helped us before, but it’s admittedly difficult to pin down his motives. However, if saving him is going to be necessary to the plot, then Solmare probably isn’t gonna make us rescue a bad guy. Emphasis on probably.

Also… he says “first birthday here in the Devildom”... which leads me to believe that MC will have many, many birthdays with the brothers to come in the future. So. Now that I’ve talked about Solomon, I’d like to talk about Luke.

He sends you a chat that opens up some pretty good insight into the whole situation:

Now, we know that Luke is pretty fond of MC, and we’re led to believe that Simeon cares about MC too; however, this whole “charm that attracts both demons and angels alike” doesn’t sit quite right with me. Now, yes, both the in-game angels care about MC, but that doesn’t seem to quite cover Luke’s statement. But what if… There are other angels that have taken an interest in MC? And I don’t mean romantically, I mean… what if one or more of them know about our power? As I said before, Lilith gave us a power boost for something that’s coming up in the future. Something big. And if MC truly has a special sort of charm that attracts demons and angels alike, they could prove to be very dangerous if, say, there were to be another power struggle between realms. But what does this all have to do with Luke anyways? Remember who Luke works for? Michael. Yes, that’s right, the Archangel Michael. Probably the most powerful angel in all of the Celestial Realm. What does this have to do with anything? Well, after the exchange program ends, the higher-ranked angels (including Michael) are no doubt going to want reports of everything that happened during the exchange program… including information about MC. And really, who better to ask that information from than someone as utterly devoted to Michael himself as we’ve seen Luke is?

And if this is the case… Michael will probably hand all of that information right over to God. Given how the Obey Me God seems to be, this is not good news for MC or the brothers.

Now. Just because we can’t trust God doesn’t mean we should go blindly trusting Diavolo and Barbatos either. In fact, @phairfantooooom does a phenomenal job here explaining just how sketchy and terrifying they really are. Maybe I’ll have more of my own comments to add later if the mood strikes me, but for now I’m gonna leave it at that.

One final word: MC is being used as a pawn in a grander game between the realms for which they have no idea how to play, but they better figure it out fast.

Or maybe, just maybe, I’m losing my mind during quarantine and I really just want the sexy, shady sorcerer to not be a bad guy.

We’ll see. So... what do you all make of this? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

[dreamties]

Slashers W/ a Soft Pastel S/O

A/n - So this one actually wasn’t requested, I just thought it would be super cute. And what I mean by “Soft Pastel”, I mean being into soft/pastel/kawaii fashion, I just didn’t know how to phrase it. Since there’s so many subcultures.

Trigger Warning: Slight Cursing (I say f*ck)

Also- these are gender neutral, but a few describe you in skirts/dresses, so if you’re not comfy with that, just skip that part or the whole thing?? :/

I might do more like this for other types of alternative fashion- like punk or something? Or a S/O who has a lot of body mods, I think it would be fun.

Characters: Billy/Stu, The Lost Boys, Helen Lyle, Daniel Robitaille/Candyman, Brahms Heelshire, and Amanda Young.

I didn’t add Michael Myers, but can do so if y’all want it. I just think he’d be very indifferent about it...didn’t think that would be very fun to read.

Billy Loomis + Stu Macher

Stu would be the most like into your outfits

Billy? Not so much. he just thinks you look cute in everything.

but if you did more guro-kawaii looks? they would both be all over that shit. 

it combines more of the grotesque in with the cute- which is just perfect for the boys. they get to see you dawned in all sorts of blood, guts/gore, bandage patterns/aesthetics.

and maybe even tying in different monster-ish elements. 

like wearing funky white or other unnatural colored contacts, really intense makeup(especially around the eyes), and fuck it, maybe you’re wearing faux demon horns.

I think they’d find it kinda hot. if we’re being perfectly honest here.

Now- would you able to get them into it as well?

Stu will ask you, with excitement reverberating throughout out his body and his voice. of course he want’s to at least try it!

so many clips in Stu’s hair. you haven’t even had that many in your hair before!

he may also wear rings sometimes. he thinks all the colors and designs are just so fun!

and on the other hand...

Billy, the guy that basically wore the same outfit for an entire movie? who’s closet only contains jeans and white t-shirts? trying out your style? i don’t think so lol

if you do- somehow- get him to try...

then you might have pressured him into it a bit? very jokingly, of course. 

“C’mon, humor me, babe. Stu’s already dressed and everything!” You try giving him puppy eyes to seal the deal.

“Fine!” Billy says, grabbing the garment and a few clips from your hands. He shuts the door too harshly behind him.

A short silence is shared, before you and Stu burst out laughing. “Do you think he’s mad at us?” You’re hardly able to get it out. Of course he was, but in his own odd way appreciated this adventure.

He comes back a moment later, his white t-shirt replaced with a pastel red one, an especially gory character printed on the front. and a red clip barely hanging on to one of the side pieces of hair in front of his face. You try to suppress a giggle at Billy’s messily put together look.

for the love of gosh- don’t actually laugh when he appears. he is very outside of his comfort zone, and he’s only doing this because he loves you and Stu, and just,, don’t add this to his list of reasons not to try new things.

whatever your reaction ends up being, you’re absolutely obligated to tell them how attractive they look in it(even Billy who looks hella dorky).

(my art)

The Lost Boys

the comparison between their dark, punk-ish style and then the sweet baby pinks and blues, and soft lavenders that adorned your form?? 

it’s just too sweet.

they are completely enamored by your style- even if certain vampires (and I’m not naming any names, but I definitely mean David) may not show his love for your look as openly

Marko- he’d get one cutesy patch for his jacket, so he has like a little piece of you everywhere he goes. also...he genuinely ended up really digging your style? but not enough to abandon his punk look completely. he is still totally dedicated to that.

the other boys will absolutely mess with him about the patch though

all in good fun!

David’s not letting you near his hair with any extra clips or accessories. 

Dwayne enjoys the quiet intimacy shared between the two of you. just sitting together, you might be styling his hair( super loose ponytail or braid- admit it, it would be so cute! and helpful so his hair isn’t always in his face!)...anyways, you’d use a colorful hair tie, and a few clips to help pin back his hair. 

he probably won’t go out with the clips in, but if it’s just the five of you at the cave? he’ll keep it in until it’s time to sleep. 

he loves seeing how happy and accomplished you look after finishing with his hair tho.

Paul is hands down the most likely to get into the whole look and go out in public with it on. 

makeup? hell yeah. it won’t be as intense as yours, and he probably only does the eyes and maybe some shine. sparkly vampire time

hair accessories? all of them

would try combining his look with yours, to have a perfect mess of it.

a light, light  blue mesh top, slightly darker blue jacket(with slight accents in pink, purple, white or black), and his usual sort of white jeans(?) would still look great with it. he’s absolutely rocking that look.

you are ecstatic to finally have someone else to share your passion with! (much harder to find similar folks when you’re a vampire,,)

Helen Lyle

she’s so used to the plain life around her, and she’d been living before you- you were such a breath of fresh air.

of course, you’re darling personality also drew her into you- but your fashion sense? it fascinated her.

she’s not trying it herself anytime soon, but she appreciates the fact that you enjoy it. 

the most she would ever try is a very natural makeup look. and a coat or two of a pastel color of her choice.

she would love watching you get ready. not so much help out though- she just likes seeing the way you approach things. how you choose to pair certain pieces with one another.

she’ll ask questions to better understand your interests! not that it’s weird or wrong that you’re into it, she’s just a very inquisitive person.

you’d wear a lot of blue though- because you know Helen likes that color.

imagine wearing coordinated looks for different events and such. so, when you go with Helen to help out with her Candyman thesis, you might wear candy-themed attire. (of course in this universe,, she wouldn’t die! so no worries of that! you get to keep you’re gf).

if you do gift her something, she keeps it on her bedside table(or dresser). so she can still admire it, and still serves a purpose. fun décor!

all around though- Helen would be very chill, but captivated, about you’re interests.

Daniel Robitaille - Candyman

 his life is so dark and gruesome, and he loves seeing you all dressed up. 

and while he’s dead- long dead- and isn’t really apart of the world in the same sense that you are- it gives him this happy sense of hope for the world.

because there’s this very small thing, that you hold close to your heart, that makes you smile.

Also!!

even if they’re apart of a super awful, traumatic, part of his past- the bees are just a part of the family now.  

so cute yellow/spring/bee themed outfits?? yes. ohh definitely, yes.

As for him dressing up? He’d feel hesitant.

he’s filled with immense joy around you, but is almost scared with someone altering part of his attire or self in any way(rooted back to, again, past stuff).

but part of loving is to take the person as a whole, bad parts, good parts- insecurities- the entire package. and trusting one another.

he has his whole faith in you not to do anything bad.

and so, it becomes a habit for the two of you to spend mornings together, chatting and getting ready. well, you’re getting ready, it’s more for the quality time together for him.

things are little different for Daniel. for many reasons. 

one, he has very short hair. so the clips don’t really work there..

two- he only has one hand, and he’s “working” a lot with the appendages he does have. rings won’t work out because they might fall off- and he’d hate to lose something of yours.

three- he’s not a big makeup fan. he’s happy enough watching you put it on.

and then for his actual attire- he needs the coat to cover his insides. it’s also, in a way, his uniform.

you’ve settled on two things.

making homemade necklaces that can easily hide under his big coat (either sweets or honey/bee themed).

and sewing little patterns on the inside of his coat. other’s wouldn’t be able to see it, but he would know it’s there.

Brahms Heelshire

imagine being super into sorta ‘sweet lolita’, pastel/soft colors, bows, the big skirts, all the sorta ruffles(?)

 and then especially if your shorter than Brahms(which is really,, not hard to do unless you’re insanely tall cause he’s,, 6 foot 3.)- and he thinks you look like such a doll? 

but like,, in a nice way. 

I think he’d get pretty excited if he got to help you set up your outfits!

especially if you praised him for picking out a good combo, or organizing correctly.

and some of Brahms movements are a bit awkward, he’s spent most of his life in the walls and the attic...but imagine turning on his music, and just dancing with him. having him twirl you in his arms a few times.

Brahms loves having your hands through his hair. and if hair accessories means he gets more of that love and attention? then yes,, yes he will wear them.

he just likes feeling taken care of, and along with your usual duties, you help him figure out the soft fashion styles, and how to make it more appealing and suitable for his own tastes.

because- as you insist- you want it to be something he enjoys just because he does, and not just for the closeness. though you can’t deny you love that aspect, too.

i can tell you one thing right here, though. you’re never getting makeup on him. he does not like taking off his mask, even if you’ve been in a relationship with him for a while, he still hides his face a lot.

you’d offered to do his makeup once, since he was staring so intently as you did yours. you’d made the mistake of reaching for his mask. you’d usually ask before doing so, but sometimes you’d slip up.

You apologize profusely, offering your arms out to him for a hug. “There, there, Brahms.” You smile, giving him a slight squeeze of affection. 

he does take your stuff sometimes. 

it’s a little annoying when you think you’ve lost your favorite accessory or dress or etc and then you just realize,, oh, it’s my favorite wall boy again. thank gosh you love him, so you’re not really upset or anything.

he just likes having little reminders of you, it gives him reassurance. upon other warm and fuzzy feelings.

if you’re able to find time in your day though, you’ll make cute little trinkets or bracelets for him. you’ll gift them or purposely leave them out for him-  so you’ll still have some of your stuff when it comes to getting ready the next day.

in short- he’d much rather look at you than partake on his own. 

Amanda Young

she’s never seen anything like this! :0

everyone she knows, herself included, tend to wear more dulled, plain clothes.

she’s immediately very intrigued by your attire...sort of want’s to try it, but is a bit self conscious and embarrassed to ask.

So!! you start out with small things, and fairly early on you both realize that she loves when you decorate her hair with accessories. 

gifting Amanda a pair of little pig clips!!

or little stud earrings- those would be fricking adorable on her!

and she’s just so happy,, wtf

you dress mostly for yourself, but the more you’re in a relationship with your gf- the more you want to dress for her as well. 

you can see this little sparkle in her eye when she sees you, and you want to keep seeing that look for as long as you can.

you slowly get her into it. your relationship and Amanda’s interest in your style just gives her so much light in an otherwise dim world.

if she did get into it, I think she’d do more creepy/cute. as a way to sort of cope with past trauma. that this sort of “bad” thing (the creepy) can still coexist with the good (the cute). she admires that quality.

just very sweet partners, who happen to love similar types of fashion 

[staytiny-present]

Ateez Coraline!au

DUDE I’M DONE WITH SCHOOL WHICH MEANS I CAN WRITE MORE YAYYYY!

anyway, this is meant to be a little headcanon thing for a series i’ve been planning that is, obviously, based on the movie coraline. it’ll be a reader insert for you to enjoy as well :) this is basically a “ateez as characters in coraline,” but my plan is to still make them unique to the story. i hope you like this!

warnings: this does not match at all swearing, angsty situations, borderline crack (you’ll see), i think i make one sex joke, allusions to depression - PLEASE take caution when you read yunho’s part. i don’t think i go into any specifics, but his gets serious that i just want you to be aware

Reader’s backstory: you’ve lived with your grandmother who owns the pink palace apartments since you were a teenager so you can help her out as she gets older. the pink palace isn’t the most well-known, but it’s gotten a pretty negative rap since the disappearance of your best friend in high school. it’s hard living there still, but you know your grandma needs the support. you know nearly all of the ins and outs of the place, and all of the tenants adore both you and your grandma

Wooyoung and Yeosang ~ Spink and Forcible

tell me i’m wrong

that’s right you can’t

they’ve been friends for years and bicker and tease each other like they’re married and still love and support each other? yeah

wooyoung and yeosang are childhood friends

they mostly did dance in high school but they were also in theater, and they were kinda well known for being The Best™

they were recruited to join a lot of teams and a lot of colleges wanted them because they were just??? amazing??? how tf??

so yeah they earned a lot of recognition in high school that honestly got them really famous from when they were 16 onward

it’s been a few years since then and so the hype around them has definitely died down but we’ll get to that

they are currently still working on stuff in regards to dancing and acting

they’re technically in college too, but they do online classes so they can stay at home and work on their shows

wooyoung is the idealist while yeosang is the realist

like i said, they act like an old married couple always bickering and fighting but they really do love each other

ride or die best friends dude

it’s just that they say they’ll do certain things or are planning things soon and it just… doesn’t happen

that’s mostly idealist woo talking before yeosang can reign him in

so for years it’s been a lot of empty promises of new work that many people just stopped expecting things from them

and because of that they’ve past their peak and are basically just in limbo before they are actually able to make/perform their next show or something like that 

they rent the basement apartment of the pink palace, and they’ve technically lived in there the longest actually

growing up, both of their families lived there so that was how they met and became the best of friends :)

they didn’t want to leave either but they had to for a couple years

but at least they stayed together :)

their families moved back when the boys were about a year into high school just because the old woman who owns the place is a gem and the city had a great school for them to go to

while they were living there though a boy around their age went missing, and it basically convinced their families that they should move out

wooyoung and yeosang were very adamant about staying, so their families told them you’re either moving away with us or finding a way to pay for the apartment yourselves

so the next day wooyoung and yeosang went out and found themselves some jobs so that they could

it upset their parents sure, but they were also kinda proud that they took so much initiative about this - they knew they would succeed in life

it also factored into why grandma let them stay because she knew the same thing

the sweet woman even said she would help them out from time to time :(

then cue the next 3-4 years where woo and yeo are making a bunch of money with their dances teams and performing in shows 

they’ve gotten a good amount of money over the years that they’ve been able to renovate the basement so that it’s really nice

now they have posters of their “golden years” (as wooyoung says) from high school and their first years of college all around their place

they have a dog and have been seriously considering getting more because he’s getting kind of old :( 

they don’t really get out much bc they are constantly trying to plan and work on their shows, but it’s fine because there’s nothing really close to the pink palace :/ the closest city where they went to school is quite the commute

but because of all this - the empty promises, the lack of activity, the radio silence - no one really takes them seriously anymore, and really people just stopped believing in them

it’s a major factor in their motivation and work ethic, but they try their hardest not to let it deter them from what they want to do in life

Mingi, San, and Jongho ~ The Amazing Bobinsky

trust me here ok?

mingi, san, and jongho start their own circus right out of high school

hear me out

the boys all went to high school together, but jongho is a year younger than them so they all graduated at different times

however they had a lot of classes together because they didn’t really care much about school and it reflected on their academics

so they were put in a lot of lower classes together that they all did well in, they just didn’t care about school

their circus started out as a joke honestly

it was probably edgy teen jongho who was like “ugh i hate school i should just drop out and join the circus”

and it became a running joke between them like haha yeah let’s join the circus, who would we all be tho?

mingi and san were both very adamant that jongho would be the strongman what with all his fruit breaking endeavors and the buff buff arms dude

san did martial arts and liked dancing and was very flexible so he was like ayy i’ll be the acrobat

it took them a while to decide what mingi would be because they were like “huh well what about the lion tamer?” “you know how much of a fraidy cat he is?” “ok well what about a trapeze artist?” “he’s a great dancer and flexible sure, but would he ever be able to have that kind of coordination?” “ok fine then what about a clown?” “fuck you guys”

they chose sword swallower mostly because like??? how does it work?? idk mingi should find out 

and yeah for a while it was a running joke between all of them like yeah we’re gonna drop out of school and join the circus lol

but then come mingi and san’s senior year and they were like… hang on

could… could we actually do this? it sounds fun as hell

it went as far as them all researching circuses in their spare time and income and how to go about joining one

and it ended with them not wanting to live the lifestyle of a traveling circus 

sure it sounded cool as fuck, but while they were somewhat willing to live with those conditions, they weren’t willing enough

so the next best thing for them would be to start their own circus

of course, how do you tell your parents that what you want to be when you grow up is a circus performer?

the answer: you don’t 

whenever they were asked things likes “oh what do you want to do in college?” they all just kinda passed it off as they didn’t know, but in reality they didn’t really have any desire to go to college

you don’t need a degree to start a circus, so they didn’t really want to

once mingi and san graduated, they immediately started looking for affordable apartments where they could do their thing - start their circus

in all honesty they started looking before they graduated too, partially since they would be moving out after hs but also because they just felt better about not living with their parents 

they had seen the pink palace in the newspaper a lot with a vacant attic apartment, and basically since they found out about it they were sold on it

a weird place in the middle of nowhere run by a woman who doesn’t mind housing younger people? perfect

they actually met her before they graduated so they could see about renting the apartment sooner or later

grandma all but told them it was there’s once she met the boys, and she understands that when they are finally able to start living there they will be pretty tight on money, so she doesn’t even make them pay the down payment - she does that herself and holds the apartment for them

because let’s face it: the pink palace isn’t very big,, it already has a good amount of people living there,,, how many people are actually gonna consider moving to the middle of nowhere to actually live there?

plus she likes these three boys, so she wants to help them as much as she can

so yeah once mingi and san graduate, they are basically ready to move into the pink palace

but this is technically after that boy went missing and after the case turned cold, so grandma doesn’t want to rent to anyone new

but she already assured the boys that the attic was theirs, and she’s not about to break that promise

so before giving the boys the keys she gives them the lowdown of what’s been going on and what will happen in the future

they know the boy went missing, but she explains to them all that happened and that it gives the pink palace a bad rap (even though she hardly cares about that), so she wouldn’t normally be doing something like this but they will be the last people she lets rent from her

and they don’t completely understand because they have no idea what this has been doing to the poor old woman, but they understand enough and are grateful for her that she’s still letting them live there

they decide then that it would be better for jongho to start living with them now even before he’s graduated just so it’s less of a change for grandma in the future

which jongho is totally okay with because he honestly would rather live with them anyway

but uh yeah mingi, san, and jongho are the last ones to start renting at the pink palace for a long while

they split rent three ways so that it’s less burdensome on them, and they all have jobs so that they can afford it

mingi and san work full time while jongho has a part time job while he finishes school

but full time they are all preparing and planning their circus!!

takes a lot of throat training for mingi 😏 since he is literally putting swords down his throat, and he started this basically right when they decided their circus was going to be real

san and jongho have advantages because they already have some skill in their areas, but that doesn’t mean they don’t train

san still takes martial arts and dance, and he’s even signed up for gymnastics to help him with his flexibility

jongho basically spends all of his spare times working out (mostly lifting weights) so that he can really be strong

but also jongho has a thing for rats/mice and is like “hey,, why don’t we use them for something so that it’s not just us?”

and the boys lowkey are like wtf dude why but then again who are they to shut down his ideas when they are literally starting a circus?

so they’re like fine but that’s on you to decide how to do that and to plan the act

jongho: yessss ratssss

also jongho: NO they’re not RATS they’re MICE these are MICE THANK YOU

this is the “jumping mice” aspect of the coraline movie with bobinsky just fyi

a lot of jongho’s time in school is spent in the science and psychology departments talking to teachers about animals (specifically rats/mice) and how to train and work with them

the teachers are all kinda like… what? but also they are just happy that jongho is interested in something enough to come to the teachers and ask questions and apply himself

lmao it’s not for school tho

so he learns a lot of this information at school and honestly this might be the only thing he learns at school because soon enough he’s graduating with a bunch of knowledge on how to work with and train animals

once out of high school he starts working full time too so that money and rent is even easier

all of their extra money that isn’t toward rent and bills and groceries go to their circus

they hardly ever buy new clothes unless it’s something for their circus

also the boys had to go to grandma to ask if they could house mice in their apartment, and while it was a hard no (unless they were trained and wouldn’t cause trouble), jongho still smuggled them in

grandma knows about it too (bc she knows everything that goes on for the most part lmao) but she doesn’t say anything because they don’t cause trouble and she likes the boys

the day one of them gets loose and starts terrorizing and infesting the pink palace is the day she intervenes and tells them to get rid of them

but jongho is actually really good at training the mice so it’s fine

my point surrounding all of this is to say that mingi, san, and jongho are in the long and arduous stage of their lives and their circus of planning and preparing everything

they only make so much money and have so many resources that setting up their circus and doing everything to prepare is going to take a long time before they can actually open and show people what they’ve been working on

they’ve been doing it for a few years now and they’ve still hardly made a dent

they have to train and perfect their acts sure, but they also have to do all of the logistical stuff like advertising, selling tickets, finding venues, paying for safety and legal stuff, etc.

and these boys are only in their early 20s, so it’s gonna take a while before they can actually open their circus

but they are determined and passionate, so if this is what they have to do then they will happily do it

Yunho ~ The Ghost Children

oh god this is gonna start getting serious i’m sorry

in case you can’t tell, yunho is the boy that goes missing from the pink palace

he and his family lived in the pink palace from when he was pretty young until he was in high school

he was also really good friends with wooyoung and yeosang because they were all the same age

however he was... not happy

he always worked his ass off dancing because that’s what he wanted to do, but it meant his grades in school tanked

this would obviously be worrying to some parents, and his gave him an ultimatum

either get your grades up and start taking school seriously, or you’re not going to be allowed to continue your dance lessons

the answer was clear to yunho, so he told his dance teacher that he would be taking a break for a bit so he can focus on school

everything was fine until he realized his parents had zero intentions of letting him go back anyway

he didn’t understand,, his grades were getting better so why couldn’t he go back?

to put it plainly, his parents said this:

“what kind of career could you make out of dance? you’ll never succeed”

it was crushing

it was then that yunho realized that his own parents didn’t care about what he wanted and was passionate about

he didn’t think they ever would either, so he just sort of... stopped believing in them

it wasn’t all bad because he had his closest friends and grandma (who treated him like her own grandson)

but he had some pretty bad days that made the happy and energetic boy almost completely unrecognizable

he would look at wooyoung and yeosang and see how successful they were despite still being in school

he would see how their talent was rightfully recognized and sought after

and he would get down on himself, thinking how he wanted the same thing but fearing no one would see him

that’s why he worked hard at everything he did, why his motivation plummeted, and why he nearly wore himself out before even graduating

but one day he started acting strange

everyone noticed how a switch seemed to flip in him

that excited glimmer was back in his eyes, and no one knew why

don’t get me wrong, everyone was so happy to see the smiley yunho was back, but everyone wanted to know what happened

but he hardly made any sense when he told them

he supposedly found a place in the pink palace where he could do what he wanted, but whenever he tried showing anyone he couldn’t? the door was bricked up

everyone started thinking he made it up, that the stress was finally getting to him and he dreamt up a place like this so he wouldn’t lose his mind

that glimmer was gone again, and he stopped trying to talk to people

in fact, he closed himself off from everyone 

the day he went missing was the scariest day for everyone in the pink palace

everyone was devastated, but it completely changed his parents

grandma advised them to move out while the police investigated, but they refused despite how hard it was

but after a year the case became cold

no one could find yunho nor could anyone figure out what happened to him

he just disappeared without a trace

his parents still tried to stay though because they needed to find out what happened to their son

but they couldn’t. no one could

it wasn’t long before they too found it best that they move out of the pink palace

it was just too painful

that was the last time grandma ever rented to anyone new, so the apartment became completely vacant for years

even after they left, no one was able to figure out what happened to yunho

Seonghwa ~ The Black Cat

geomeun goyangi nero nero nero

uhhhh yeah seonghwa’s a cat lmao

he’s not owned by anyone and doesn’t have a collar or anything

he’s a stray that has been around for a while

he showed up pretty soon after yunho started distancing himself from people, but not soon enough for people to think that he’s an omen or something

and he’s not exactly

idk really how to explain it so i won’t lmao

he just sort of became the pink palace’s cat???

grandma takes responsibility for him though and makes sure he’s fed and has a place to rest and play if he ever feels like it

which is nice and all but he doesn’t?? do any of those things?

he comes and goes a lot sure,,, no one really knows where he goes but they know he’ll be back

but when he hangs out around the pink palace? he just... wanders?

it’s hard to explain but it’s almost like he is surveying the domain, like he’s searching for something wrong

he’s a weird cat

not only that though, but he doesn’t eat? or sleep? at all???

at least no one ever sees him sleeping or eating

he’s always getting into shit tho, like he’s always there when you don’t want him to be

there have been many times wooyoung has kicked him out of the apartment because the dogs hate him

mingi and san also try to keep him out because of jongho and his rats mice, but honestly jongho is pretty cool with him

because he doesn’t do anything to the mice? he literally just sits there and watches with wide and curious eyes

sure jongho worries about hwa one day stealing one of his mice for grandma to see so that she can make him get rid of them or kick them out but that’s not going to happen right?

hwa is chill tho, so jongho is chill

the cat would follow yunho around a lot, and a lot of times they were seen curled up together

yunho would be taking a nap the poor boy but hwa wouldn’t

he would just be there to comfort him :(

honestly he liked yunho and his best friend the most and everyone could tell jongho was a close second tho

they all came to start calling him mars instead of The Cat™ since they didn’t know his name

they still call him The Cat™ when he pisses them off but i digress

despite how fucking weird he is though, everyone at the pink palace basically loves him

he’s just Their Cat™ ok?

sure he might be annoying and shifty, or he might be haunted, or he might even be immortal

he’s a really weird cat dude

but he’s part of the family,, they gotta love him

Hongjoong ~ Coraline

curtesy of inception era hongjoong 

so joong is our main man here

at first he had no relation to the pink palace whatsoever,, he had never even heard of it

he lived with a friend in a fairly large city before and it was fine and all but WOW was it expensive

and it was honestly very stifling to hongjoong,,, he couldn’t really do everything he wanted to do there

he found the pink palace by accident

he was searching up affordable apartments to live in places that have good weather and conditions for gardening

let me explain though

hongjoong is in his downward stretch of college for a journalism degree, but he’s taking online classes with his move so that he can focus on that and working

he wants to work in gardening and writing, but he also really just wants to make stuff

his realistic plan is to work in journalism and write for like a gardening magazine or journal while gardening as a “side project” or something (like coraline’s parents do)

did somebody say florist joong? because i did

the dream job though would be to work in song writing or fashion or something artistic like that

he likes painting and making/customizing clothes so he would like to be able to make a career out of that

his goal is to eventually make his own business or store where he makes and sells affordable and sustainable clothes and accessories

he’s going for a degree in journalism with a minor in business, but he has been struggling with both so he has been debating dropping business

arguably it would be better for him to stick with business but most people in his life have told him he’s better in journalism and so he keeps at that mostly 

he feels unfulfilled - he wants to plant a garden, he wants to make and alter clothes customly, he wants to make music

but he isn’t able to do any of that because what are the odds any of that ends up working as a career? 

it might work for a little while but in the future he would technically be a small business, and maintaining a small business is difficult

at least with writing and working for a magazine/journal is stable

however it’s not what he’s most passionate about, thus he finds it hard to have motivation to work

he feels like a zombie going through his days the same as the last, just trying to get through school before he gets a 9-5 job that he’ll hate within a year (if that) doing something he doesn’t want to do

but hey, that’s adult life, isn’t it? 

he doesn’t like to complain and feels guilty when he is ungrateful for his circumstances because he knows plenty of people (his parents included) that went down this route who ended up fine, which means he will too

the one person who always told him to go after what he wanted was his mom even though she technically “settled” in life

holy shit did i digress

but yeah in his search for an affordable place to live with good weather, there wasn’t a lot 

but he also wanted a drastic change from what he was used to, and that was the pink palace

it was practically in the middle of nowhere, and the pictures (while pretty dull) showed potential for a great garden

it was perfect

however

it was a hard no from grandma when he called about possibly renting, so he wasn’t expecting her to call him back at all

grandma didn’t want to risk anything because of what happened with yunho

but with some convincing, she realized that she couldn’t keep holding on

while what happened was horrible, there was nothing that could be done as sad as it was

so she called hongjoong back about when the best time to come look at the pink palace would be

and the rest is history

[thefanficmonster]

Kick Some Ghost Ass

”Until Dawn Gang x Reader (Gender Neutral)

Warnings: Swearing, Sex jokes (excuse my bad humor)

Genre: CRACK, Humor

Summary: It’s one thing when trouble finds this gang, but why don’t we take a look at what happens when they go actively looking for trouble. Needless to say, chaos ensues and no one is spared. Some are more affected than others, and some are dead-ass traumatized, but isn’t that just how life is in general?

Requested by my dearest ever - Until Dawn Anon. Hi lovely! I’ve missed writing your requests and I’m really happy to be back, creating another chaotic fic! I’m sorry it has taken me so long to post it but here it finally is - crazy as ever! I hope you enjoy it! Love you to Blackwood Pines and back baby ❤❤❤

I don’t know how I’ve found myself in this situation but I’m not complaining. If I get to do dumb crazy shenanigans with my crew, I’m ready for just about anything. Not to mention I’m no stranger to ghost hunting. I’m that kid that made DIY Ouija boards and took them to cemeteries with their terrified friends. You should’ve seen us leaving after capturing no ghostly activity - my friends relieved as fuck, and me pissed as fuck.

But today, I’m not expecting nor will I be accepting any disappointment. Especially not with Jess swearing on her Chanel purse that she wasn’t making things up when she said she had a haunted house she wanted us to visit. I must say, I appreciate this group’s enthusiasm when it comes to the paranormal. Never have I had someone who catches my vibe on the subject so well, let alone an entire gang all sharing the same opinion as me - that ghosts, demons and poltergeists are so fucking cool. Sure, Emily took a bit of convincing and Jess is not one to give a shit about the other world creatures invisible to the human eye, but something allegedly happened that changed her mind.

Her a-hundred-and-something-year-old great-grandmother passed away recently and though the death itself didn’t shake Jess up as much as it probably should’ve, the events that followed led to this moment right now - the eleven of us pooling out of two minivans that have pulled up to a terrifying looking house in a wooded are of the suburbs. Jess literally gathered us all on an ‘emergency meeting’ in the courtyard of our college just so she could explain the situation in detail - she doesn’t do well with explaining things in general, let alone when she’s hysterical - so we only understood what she was trying to say when she mentioned the word ‘ghost’. That’s when we all started listening more closely, with the exception of Emily, Beth and Sam but the latter two were intrigued despite trying yo hide it. You can only imagine how excited Josh, Chris and I were, Mike and Matt following a close second behind. Ash was a tiny bit more hesitant but Chris convinced her to give in. And just like that, a week later, here we are.

“I gotta ask, did your great-gran own a VHS player? Or a chest in the attic? Bonus points if there’s a creepy, child-sized doll in there.“ Josh asks as he yanks all the equipment he insisted we bring out of the trunk of the minivan.

“Quit fucking around, Josh! This is serious!“ Jess complains from the spot she’s standing in, shivering in the cold autumn breeze.

“Yeah, Josh! VHS players, creepy dolls, that’s all child’s play.“ I scold him as I pull on my jacket, wrapping it around me more tightly, “Shit gets serious when there’s a secret basement.“

“Y/N!“ Jess shrieks in exasperation. Honesty, how am I supposed to NOT bother her when doing the opposite is so much easier and brings more amusement? “You’re not helping!“

“Wasn’t trying to.“ I wink at her, driving her into a new level of fury that almost leads her to chuck her phone at me. If it weren’t such a prized possession of hers, I’m pretty sure she would’ve chucked it with the intention of knocking me dead. I’m lucky she has the aim of a drunk toddler that spun around fifteen times.

“Hey, quit pissing my girlfriend off, will ya?!“ Mike, who is basically halfway inside the trunk of the other van calls out to us.

I roll my eyes but choose to let it slide. However, someone else doesn’t. Emily does a dramatic turn on her heel, turning to face Mike, or at least the only part of him which is visible. You can imagine how hard it is arguing with an ass like THAT. I don’t know how Emily does it but oh well, I guess I do it too, in a way.

“So it’s girlfriend now, huh? No space between the words?“ Oh that smile she’s flashing him, it could make the Devil himself shiver. I find it kinda hot though - it means shit’s about to go down or hit the fan, either way, the rest of us will be entertained.

Mikey boy straightens up, gracing the rest of us by-standers with his dazzling features. Nah, I’m capping. I honestly think Mike is as attractive as I am patient - very little, almost not at all. It’s surprising how him and Jess are now apparently together since I always pegged her to be the superficial type.

“Got a problem with that, Em?“ He asks, eyebrow raising, head tilting to the side. Oh yeah, it’s on now. But, as someone who’s been quite excited to do some ghost hunting, and also as a representative of the peanut gallery formed of the rest of us who find it amusing and annoying, I feel the need to cut it short before it goes where it shouldn’t. I came to see some exorcist shit, not Keeping Up With The Bitter Exs.

“Jess, I sure hope your grandma is a blood-thirsty ghost cause I can think of at least two people I’d serve to her on a silver platter.“ I snatch the keys the blond has been jingling nervously between her fingers and jog up the stairs to the front door.

Ok I maybe overexaggerated the eeriness of the house. It sure wouldn’t sit right with you if you saw it around sunset or at night, especially not if it’s foggy, but a horror movie house it is most certainly isn’t. It’s pristine and well kept, not a single crack in the walls, the only reason it’s unsettling is because: 1) We’ve all seen a few too many horror movies; 2) There’s been reports of ‘ghostly activity’ - as far as Jess is to be trusted.

While I’m surfing through all the keys, checking each and every single one of them on the door because the real key is unmarked, I can’t help but overhear the conversation going on behind me on the porch.

“Can you believe we got all this in a single day and for a discount on top of all?! Whoever says Craigslist sucks isn’t doing it right.“ Chris’ enthusiasm over the deal him and Josh got on the ghost hunting equipment has been what’s keeping a wide grin on his face this whole time. Though I’m proud of my boys for not getting murdered by the Craigslist seller, I must say I hate that I lost the bet we had - I had to pay them each ten bucks if they didn’t get scammed/kidnapped/murdered and I’m now twenty bucks poorer. I’m not saying I value those twenty bucks more than my friends, though my broke ass needs all the bucks it has and all the dollar bills it could get, but Lord knows I hate losing.

“Yeah, and the guy was only mildly sketchy.“ Josh adds just as excitedly and proudly, “To be honest, Cochise and I were probably the scary looking ones in that parking lot.“

A look over my shoulder shows the twins, Sam, Matt and Ash giving the duo skeptical and somewhat disappointing looks and shakes of their heads. I’ll admit, the equipment is in very good condition and it’s the complete set for ghost-hunting, according to BuzzFeed at least. I’m impressed with the purchase - probably had something to do with how scary Chris and Josh actually look. The all-nighters we’ve all been pulling lately have taken a toll on them worst with the dark circles and bags under their hollow eyes, pale faces and brains turned to mush. I know I’d give them a discount to avoid them pulling out meat cleavers on me.

“That’s all fine and dandy guys, but do you know how to work any of this?“ Sam asks, hesitantly lifting the EMF reader and turning it in her hand, analyzing it with a curious gaze. 

Josh and Chris exchange a look before the former replies, “Just the cameras and voice recorder, the rest falls on them.” He points a finger at me and laughs, “Though they aren’t able to work something as simple as keys, they are more than qualified to be a ghostbuster.”

“You know, Josh, jokes on you, I can work keys! Jess, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to be able to work well with organizing things, hence my problem with these keys.“ I hurl the bunch of keys connected my a scarlet keychain at Josh, “Lemme demonstrate my true skills.“ I hop down the flight of stone stairs and approach the pile of equipment the guys have created smack-dab in the middle of the house’s driveway. 

“Oh, I gotta see this!” Mr. Ex-Class-President all but runs over, frowning when we all turn to look at him just as I pick up the spirit box to show off how it works, “Oh that’s what you meant. So you aren’t taking your clothes off?“

Jess and I are alike in one thing - the need we feel to chuck objects at people who piss us off. “You’re girlfriend is, like, right behind you, Munroe. Have some decency!”

“I was gonna enjoy a show as well, but I’m guessing we won’t be getting one.“ The girlfriend in question replies, looking at me quizzically as though that’s gonna convince me into discarding my outfit.

“No, unless you’re a ghost.“ I point the device I’m holding at Mike, “But if your boyfriend here keeps acting up I might turn him into one.“

“That sounds kinda kinky.“ Beth’s comment surprises me. The wink she sends me even more so. “And I kinda like it.“

Ok, ok, ok, hold on. 

Flirting with Munroe is one thing, but Beth is a completely different story. I can be threatening Mike with a knife one moment and cracking sex jokes with him over cold beer the next. While Beth actually has the ability to get me flustered and blushing, and my close relationship with her brother doesn’t help. Mother fucker can just whack me upside the head every time he catches me fussing over my silly crush on his sister.

“Ew, you too! Keep it in your pants or at least get a room.“ Emily doesn’t miss a beat when it comes to being herself. She’s truly a garbage bin full of treasure.

“We’d do the latter if SOMEONE could get the door open.” I glare daggers at Josh who is making hopeless attempts at what I was doing earlier - unlocking that damn door.

“I’d be more than happy to come through for you ladies.“ Mike says, getting in a stance of a runner before a race, his body directly opposite the door.

Oh I can’t wait to see where this is going. I SHOULD RECORD IT.

“Mike, it’s still breaking and entering and it’s still against the law even if the person’s dead.“ Sam points out, entering her mother-like mode, ruining the fun and causing me to pout at her. She gives me a look of disappointment - one worse than I’ve ever seen on my parents - so I just shut my trap before she can also express said disappointment through words and have me feeling guilty for the rest of the day.

A loud crash suddenly echoes causing us to turn our heads to look for the source of the terrifyingly startling sound. One glance is all it takes to put our minds at ease and a second one is enough to provoke different reactions in all of us - the broken window telling the story of where Josh has disappeared.

“What did I just say about breaking and entering?!“ Sam shouts after him while the vast majority of us are cracking up like hyaenas. Jess is just gaping at the broken window next to the front door in disbelief. She obviously can’t decide whether to join in on the fun or serve as back-up to Sam. Josh did technically damage private property that’s partially hers, but if you ask me it serves her right for not marking her keys.

“Sorry, I was too busy breaking the window to hear that part of the conversation!“ Josh’s apologetic smile appears on the other side of glassless frame. I can’t tell if he’s genuinely sorry or holding back laughter but either way, he looks innocent enough for Sam to let him off the hook as long as he doesn’t cause any more trouble - in which case: tough luck. Chris, Josh and I are nothing if not troublemakers, especially when we’re together. Chris tones it down when Ash’s around, and the same goes for Josh with Sam while I’m simply problematic regardless of who’s watching. My chaos is untamable, it’s a blessing and a curse and I love it, even though it’s landed me in hot water more than once. It’s nice to be around people on the same wavelength - chaos resides within this group and not a single one of us can hide it.

“At least we have a way in now.“ Ash offers Josh a helping hand in this argument after she recovers from the overwhelming fit of laughter. “I hope the broken window doesn’t anger your gran, Jess.“

The blond snaps out of her trance briefly, “No, she was a very sweet lady, but damn is Josh creative!” She hurries to correct herself, “Destructively creative.”

I hurry to correct her once again, “Chaotically creative.”

“Guys, do you mind coming in? It’s very creepy standing here alone!“ Josh calls out to us, looking over his shoulder at the interior of the house, “I’m expecting to be snatched and dragged to that secret basement we mentioned.“

“Mention it one more time and I swear to God-!“ Jess screams, fists tightened.

Before her angry wrath could crash atop us, we all make our way into the house through the broken window, carefully avoiding the shards of glass strewn about. One step inside and we’re met with the upmost of horror clichés - a drop in temperature. We’re all wearing thick hoodies because the weather outside is chilly in and of itself, but said hoodies aren’t as efficient at holding the house’s cold at bay and away from out skin.

Chris and Matt make their way in last, carrying the equipment consisting of three cameras, flashlights for everyone, an EMF reader, a spirit voice box, a voice recorder and a motion detector. I help them hand a light to each group member as well as a ghost-hunting device before we venture onward.

“If I were your grandma’s ghost, I’d be ten times more pissed about that window. It looks to me like that lady payed a lot of attention to keeping things in order.“ Matt comments while he examines the expensive looking painting hanging in the hallway.

I hear Emily scoff, “Unlike some.” but the remark is said so quickly and quietly I’m pretty sure I’m the only one who heard it.

Jess laughs, “She did like things in order, but she was never as strict as you might think. As I said, she was very sweet.“

“So do you just not take after her at all or were you adopted?“ Emily’s remarks are no longer a mumbled jumble of words, “No, nevermind, of course you’re not adopted. Your parents are smart people, they wouldn’t have chosen you if they had the chance.“

Jess laughs again, much more menacingly this time, causing me to exchange a look with Hannah who’s walking beside me. “Twenty bucks says one of them isn’t making it out of here.” It’s just a matter of time, to be honest. If not the lodge, or any party we’ve ever attended as a group, this haunted house is the perfect opportunity for a murder. We could even argue it was a ghost.

Luckily, the two cats clawing at each other’s throats don’t overhear, “No, my parents aren’t stupid, but your boyfriend clearly is. He chooses to date you! Or are you holding him captive or something.“

Ok that’s enough. I can tolerate a lot of things, but people calling one of my best friends stupid is not something I’m about to put up with, “How dare you call one of my hoes stupid?” I sneer at Jess, eyes narrowing.

“I thought I was your hoe too!“ She fights back, looking almost offended.

“Even more reason you shouldn’t have called him that! I don’t tolerate my hoes not respecting each other.“ 

I don’t get to see where this argument goes because Ashley’s shriek echoes throughout the hallway, stealing mine as well as the attention of everyone else. 

“There’s a ghost in here!“ Making it to the doorway of the room she’s in first, I peak my head inside and see the EMF reader she’s holding going nuts as if it’s detected something.

“Don’t worry, Ash, there’s a dead cactus here. That’s not the ghost we’re looking for, is it?“ Chris, my amazingly bright friend says, quirking an eyebrow suggesting that remark was nothing short of dead-ass serious.

“Chris, darling, that’s not how it works. Cactuses are plants.“ I point out as sweetly as I can as to mask my laughter.

“Don’t the same ghostly rules apply?“ The genuine look of confusion he gives me almost makes me lose it.

“Ok children, leave the room, we need to set up a motion detector to be sure.“ Beth says with a tone that suggests she’s more than over our insanity. Jeez, count on her and Sam to start parenting us through our chaos. They are of high authority, must admit - one genuinely feels bad if they don’t comply to whatever these two girls demand.

We all pile out in the hallway while the twins set up this interesting motion detector with green dots. I don’t know what Jess’ granny looked like, but I bet that even the most unattractive of people would look hella good with this lighting. Thankfully the room is dark enough with the shutters closed and the curtains drawn, allowing the dots to be perfectly visible.

We stare at the minimalistic room littered with fluorescent green dots on every surface for maybe a minute or two but not much happens to the disappointment to some and relief to others. However, as if not wanting to let us down, the ghost makes a shy appearance if the shift of the green dots is anything to go by.

“Oh shit, is that a ghost?“ Chris whispers, sounding as amazed as I feel in this moment.

“It better be.“ I mutter in response, refusing to blink and risk missing anything important.

The sudden presence of the obnoxious noise of the spirit voice box makes us all jump. As I turn my head to glare at whoever’s using it, Josh speaks up. “Are you an attractive ghost?”

“Josh, that’s my great-grandmother, you ass!“ Jess barks with disgust in her voice.

In the meantime, I catch glimpse of Mike rolling up his sleeves. Oh shit, this ain’t good.

“I’ve been waiting for this!“ He shouts victoriously, cracking his knuckles.

Knowing this won’t end well, the first thing I do is snatch the camera from Chris’ hands and turn it on.

“Um, Mike, what do you mean?“ Sam’s back to being concerned, turning to the rest of us when Mike doesn’t give her a response, “What’s he gonna do?“

“Fight it.“ I answer as though it’s the most normal thing to ever have been done, “Or, ash he calls it - kick some ghost ass.“

“A freaking ghost?! He’s gonna try to tussle with something he can’t see?“ I can’t tell if Matt’s tone is disbelief, amusement or disappointment, but I believe he isn’t about to try and stop or dear ex-president in his pursuit and that’s all that matters. I ain’t about to let someone stop whatever’s about to go down from going down.

“That’s still my great-grandmother, you dumbass!“ Jess shrieks with something alike terror.

“Don’t worry Jess, I’m sure she’ll go easy on him.“ I say in an attempt to reassure her but I can’t even be bothered really, I’m too laser-focused on the circus that’s about to take place in front of me.

Mike, as if encouraged by my words, charges into the room. Much to his dismay, before he could even reach the ghost, he’s met with a much more vigorous enemy - the carpet. The rascal trips him up and Mr. Munroe falls flat on his face.

The group stays silent, looking at the glorious aftermath of the glorious fall. Told ya these lights could make everything fabulous. Must say, it’s truly an honor for me to have been able to catch all that on tape.

“10/10, would ghost-hunt with Mikey Munroe again.“

[trash-but-respectable-trash]

Headcanons of what life in the Devildom would be like if my best friend and I were both exchange student at the same time:

Heads up! This is completely self-indulgent content. I made this as a gift for my best friend: @beel-is-a-snack love you bitch 😘

Lucifer:

- Lucifer would probably really hate us at first.

- It’s feels to him like everywhere we go together, something really weird will happen

- It’s things he cannot link to us, but he knows it’s because of us because these things never happened before

- At first, we probably wouldn’t listen to his orders, we didn’t leave a controlling household just to go to another one

- A single punishment (and not the kinky kind) would be all it takes for us to never disobey his orders again

- It would come at no surprise that I would immediatly have a fat crush on him and that I would talk about him all the time to you, even though you wouldn’t understand what I see in him at first

- The more you would notice how much he cares about his brothers, the more you would like him. You two would developed a mutual understanding about taking the role of the parent by default even if that wasn’t your choice

- You two could probably also relate to each other’s daddy issues sorry love you

- With time you two could be really close friends, but probably not more than that, because he’s mine

- Don’t worry we’ll find you a more suitable boyfriend

- He definitely wouldn’t try to come between our friendship and would never be jealous of it either

- He would give us plenty of time alone, but even if he didn’t, we couldn’t even try to speak French around him because I’m 100% sure he also speak French as a second or third or fourth language

- We would probably found out about it the hard way while I would either tell you how handsome he is or you telling me he’s a control freak and he would just reply to us in perfect French

- Yeah we would only make that mistake once

Mammon

- Mammon also hates us at first, he has to take care of TWO humans?? That’s asking too much of him, he can barely take care of himself

- After a while, it would probably be the other way around as we would be the ones taking care of him

- He cannot decide which one of us he loves more (probably the one who gives him the most attention and positive reinforcement)

- He quickly becomes jealous of our friendship and tries to hangout with us every chances he gets

- It can be a bit awkward when we’re trying to talk about boys, since we’re likely talking about his brothers

- We would need to have codes to refer to the brothers or we could use French when we don’t want him to understand what we’re saying, since he’s definitely too dumb to understand French

- It was 100% clear in our minds that neither of us would end up dating Mammon as we both need someone who could mentally stimulates us

- Also he would for sure steal our stuff out of our rooms and try to sell them

- After a full week of silent treatment from both of us, he wouldn’t ever try to steal our stuff again

- He would try to trick us in participating in his shaninagans, but we would probably report it to Lucifer just to see Mammon get punish (ok mostly me, but I would drag you with me to see the aftermath)

- Never suspects us of being the one who snitch him all the time to Lucifer, he probably thinks it’s Levi

Leviathan

- Oh boy. Opposite to Lucifer and Mammon, it’s us who hates him at first

- What the fuck is that hair style, why is he always screaming and talking an hundred miles an hour rambling about animes and Ruri-Chan, who’s Ruri-Chan??

- Probably calls us normies until he finds out you had a Naruto collection when you were 13 years old and that you used to love mangas

- And that I now enjoy some animes and mangas myself, so now he calls both of us weebs, which isn’t much better honestly

- We would TOLERATE gaming with him if he isn’t screaming all the fucking time

- We would immediately leave any room we’re in everytime he says “Woooooaaaahhhh”

- He needs to shut up or else we can never be friends with him

- He also gets jealous of our friendship, he wish he had a best friend with such a strong bond, yeah he has Henry 2.0 but it’s just not the same you know

- He wonders if his friendship with Ruri-Chan would be similar to ours if she was real

- He tried to become really close with Solomon to recreate our friendship, but Solomon spent his time trying to form a pact with Levi so he ended it

Satan

- I have to say that I think that Satan and I are the most similar

- We’re both intelligent, independent and observant individuals who do not tolerate dumb people, we both enjoy reading a bit too much, we’re both messy, we’re both way too honest and we’re pros at hiding our anger (especially towards stupidity)

- Ok, so I’m not saying you wouldn’t get along with Satan, I just think you wouldn’t have much in common with him and by that I mean that’s he’s a very rational being and the best form of art in his eyes is writing

- I think what would make it or break it for both of you is his and your knowledge on all forms of arts and the history being it. Satan would probably test you and if you pass in his eyes, you can be friends, otherwise he would consider you unworthy

- Yeah I know it’s rough, but you don’t need a friend who needs to test you on your knowledge about art to see if you two can be friends

- Even if you pass the test, I don’t see you two being super close as he is mostly in his room reading and you would be in your studio, doing all of your art projects

- In any case, you guys would have to get along somehow since he would probably be the one I would be closest with and you’re my best friend so obviously you two would have to hang out by default quite a lot

- When you would be in your studio, I would probably be at the library or in Satan’s room reading

- We would also all study together and use Satan as our tutor for classes were we have more difficulty (but you’re lucky, there’s no French class given at RAD so you should do fine)

Asmodeus

- If we push aside the lust part of him and focus on his other personality traits, Asmo would like us from the start

- Two best friends how fun! He would probably tell us how Solomon is his best friend before finding out later by Solomon that it isn’t true

- Asmo is a lonely demon, sure he gets plenty of physical attention, but no one cares about him past his beauty

- We would be the one to change that, we would both see further than his beauty, but also further than his narcissistic ways to find out who the real Asmo is

- He’s the insecure one who only wants to be love. We would both act as his therapist. Sometimes he would confess to us while doing our nails and makeup or sometimes he would just start sobbing on my lap or your lap, pouring his heart out and telling us his deepest fears and secrets because he finally feels safe enough to say these things to someone

- He would probably crave our attention and comfort the more and more we listen to him. We would need to set boundaries or else we would feel like we’re suffocating. We both need our space and Asmo would have to understand that fact

- We would rub on him and he would slowly stop going out so much, instead appreciating his alone time the better he feels about himself

Beelzebub

- At first I would be a bit scared of him, he’s big and he keeps making comments about how delicious we look (and again, not in the kinky way)

- You on the other hand, would probably feel that he isn’t a bad guy at all and you would definitely see more than his angry looking face and his never ending comments about food

- Just a few conversations with him can tell how much he cares about his family and his twin in particular

- That man is such an himbo, but he also have a big heart just like you and you’re both so cute together

- Everyone ship the both of you even though you’re both emotionally dense and it would take a while for you and him to FINALLY be together

- It’s not that you didn’t love each other, it’s just that you never took the signs that the other one was sending you, mistaking it for simple kindness and nothing more

- He would probably have to just straight up tell you l that he’s in love with you for your relationship to go anywhere

- Basically everyone’s like “FINALLY” the moment you both annonce that you’re officially dating

- Wedding and kids would come shortly after that

- You’re both very family oriented and are both super vanilla so that’s a winning couple if I’ve ever seen one

Belphegor

- Ok first of all, if we were the MC, Belphie would 100% still be locked in the attic

- It would only take one warning from Lucifer for us to never go up those stairs again

- But for the sake of this, let’s say you knew this was Beel’s brother and you loved Beel so much that you were ready to face the consequences to save his brother

- And let’s say I wasn’t aware of this, because if I were and we both decided to go up the stairs anyway, it wouldn’t take me long at all before realizing that Belphie is lying to us and that we cannot trust him

- If I wasn’t aware of you going up the stairs by yourself, you’re so trusting of everyone that you would for sure do the same thing as the MC and free Belphegor just to get yourself killed. I told you dozens of time, don’t trust everyone!

- Anyway, let’s say we both died somehow (I probably got killed by Lucifer once he found out what you did) and Barbatos and Diavolo brought us to a timeline were we didn’t die

- Well, let’s say the saying “I forgive but I never forget” would represent me 100%

- I would be forgiving for the sake of Beelzebub, but Belphie and I would NEVER be close, whether it appears to be the case or not

- I might let him sleep on my lap or listen to him talk about how he loves his twin, but don’t get me wrong, I would never trust him or be his friend

- In your case, you would either be like me or you wouldn’t ever forgive him

- Forgivness isn’t always something you can control and you might always hold a grudge against him after what he did

- That could either destroy what you had with Beel, because he cannot date someone who hates his brother so much, or he could also understand how you feel, but he would still try to make you and his brother friends good luck with that

Diavolo

- Oh boy that’s my type of man right there

- What a fucking piece of ass

- Ok back on track, Diavolo would obviously be the one who’s most excited to have us in the Devildom

- He would always invite us for tea, asking us questions about the human world and laughing at our dumb stories

- We would troll him with human traditions that don’t exist like how you need to pray before eating chocolate truffle or how humans eat St-Hubert (a rotisserie restaurant comparable to Nando’s) every Sunday and how What Makes You Beautiful by One Direction is the national anthem of our country

- I can imagine him watching the video clip of What Makes You Beautiful that same night and being like “wow! That is beautiful!”

- Lucifer would be so mad at us, but it would be worth it

- We would also tell him that “thug life” and “yolo” are commonly use expression in the human world when you’re excited about something and he would start using them at the most random moments while everyone is like “???”

- We would totally hate every party hosted by Diavolo and we would 1000% leave to explore the castle only to get lost and then brought back by either Barbatos or Lucifer (lord have mercy)

- It doesn’t matter, we would do it everytime, choosing a different path everytime until we’ve explore every part of the castle (which would realistically never happen)

- Diavolo would probably give us a plan of the castle behind Lucifer’s back so we can explore the castle however we want. He himself, isn’t a fan of these events and would much rather hang out with us than be stuck making conversations with nobles he doesn’t care about

- Other than that, you would have to listen to me talk endlessly about how it isn’t fair that I cannot date both Lucifer AND Diavolo until I actually do

Barbatos

- This one is a difficult one, since we basically know nothing about the Butler

- We would probably have a good grasp of who he is if we were in the devildom, since we have pretty good intuitions on people

- I would probably talk to Barbatos about baking and all the different variations of tea, probably dropping way to soon a reference to Black Butler like he never heard the comparaison before

- Much like his devilgram story, he would probably invite me to get some specific type of tea that can only be purchase out of town, never implying that it’s a date even though he qualify it as one in his head

- There’s not much more to say about him, I think you would see him as Diavolo’s Butler more than a potential lover or close friend

Simeon

- Ouf poor sweet angel. Let’s state the obvious first, he would probably be very disappointed in me and my very obvious lust for certain demons

- Wouldn’t be happy with me straying further away from god each passing day

- I would defend myself by telling him I do pray and go once a year to church to ask God for forgiveness for all of my sins

- Yeah if I was in the Devildom, my list of sins I committed during my stay would be particularly long

- Still, I would have no regrets

- Ok, I have to say it, this angel is shady. I think we would sense that something isn’t right with him. His smile and energy are a little off, he’s definitely hiding something but what?

- If we had time to kill we could do some research on the matter and ask people around about what they know about Simeon, maybe spy on him while he’s out in town?

- We would probably get caught and ask by a very scary Simeon, to stop whatever we are doing

- Yeah let’s take the wise decision of staying away from him from now on

Solomon

- He would need to understand that it’s not because we’re all humans that we NEED to hang out together

- I would have to keep you away from him, or at least not let you hang out alone with him. I don’t think he’s evil, but he might use you as human experiment for his potions and spells and I don’t want you to accidentally be turned into a pig or something

- I’ll accept the occasional vines references wars and the team up to tell Diavolo even more made up things about the human world, but that’s all

- I would probably compare him to Harry Potter all the time

- Let’s just stay far away from the shady sorcerer

Luke

- I have no motherly instincts, but I would protect this child from all of the brothers teasing, but that’s about it. I really don’t care about this child, SIMEON COME PICK UP YOUR SON, HE POOPED HIMSELF AGAIN “Stephanie that’s not true!!” Luke would bark back as he tries to hide the streak of poop on the back of his white pants (sorry I don’t know why this came to mind, but I have this headcanon that sometimes when he’s afraid, Luke will poop his pants and this boy is VERY scared of Lucifer, so it happens quite often)

- You would probably be way more motherly towards him than me and you and Beel would basically adopt Luke as your own child

- Just always carry baby wipes and a clean pair of pants with you at all times and you’re all good

- I hope you like baking sweets, because your son will surely want to spend some bonding time with his mom over baking time, and of course you have to enjoy the sweets you both made over a nice cup of tea that Barbatos made for you two

[nitannichionne]

If He Was YOUR Fan Chapter 6: The Set Up (Henry Cavill x Reader Fan Fic)

“Tell me something.” Henry says softly as you put a small platter of appetizers next to him. He licks his lips and the simple gesture makes you press your thighs together for reasons you don’t want to think about.

You turn toward Henry as you sit in a seat next to him to watch TV. “Hmmm?”

“Why are you so…far away?” he asks. “We’ve sat on the floor, rode a motorcycle,” he sighs. “I don’t bite…well, not exactly. Why so shy tonight?”

You smile shyly. After touring the Poet’s Corner at Westminster Abbey and riding high with him over London lip locked with your leg wrapped around him, you are feeling a little exposed, a little vulnerable. He is seeing more from you than anyone has in some time. You let your feelings really show, and though it feels good every time with him, there is such a thing as spinning out of control and falling, things happening too fast and getting hurt. You don’t want that, no matter how much your body needs it, no matter how drawn you are to him. Your heart has been broken too many times.

He calls your name softly, and though there is a tender demand in his voice, there is also a plea in in his eyes, looking bluer than usual because of what he chose to wear. Once again, you respond to him, the plea and demand to come closer.

You straddle him and you feel him between your legs. You suppress a small cry of need and settle there but exhale heavily. You know you’re playing a dangerous game, but like a kitten who knows no better, curiosity gets the best of you. You take an appetizer and feed it to him, hoping to distract him by his hunger, but his eyes convey one of a different sort even as he devours it and chews slowly, not losing eye contact with you. He swallows and licks his lips, feeding you one, and then pours wine into a glass. He sips and offers you a drink after you swallow your food. As soon as you swallow the wine, he frames your face with his hands and brings you down for a kiss, lapping the insides of your mouth with deep and slow thrusts that make you moan softly. You suck his tongue as he turns his head to keep drinking from you, and you nibble his lips, lightly biting the lower one.

His eyes open slightly and he rakes your back. The sensation is delicious and you arch to him. The cross over top proves no barrier to him and he nuzzles your chest, planting wet kisses in the valley between your breasts before pushing your top open. Again, the next layer of fabric is nothing; he kisses your neck and pulls down the straps and the top just enough to bare your breasts, and rakes your back again.

“Henry!” you moan, your body helplessly grinding on his as his hands run over your backside and his fingers expertly find your slit through your skort and panties. His fingers need only push aside the fabric and he would have you. He strokes as his mouth captures one of your breasts in his mouth, swirling his tongue around the tip before gently taking into his mouth for a wet kiss that he repeats over and over.

You move in time with his hand shamelessly, aching with need as your head falls back so you can breathe. You pant and hear your own high pitched moans as he finally slips a finger into your panties and rubs your slit, still not entering you. You gasp, wishing he would come inside. This is too far, but you don’t know how to stop now.

“Shhh it’s alright, breathe, darling,” he whispers into you the hollow of your neck as he starts a rhythm.

You whimper, both your movements becoming more urgent as he grasps your hips and you grind together. You hold his shoulders as you shudder, your body pulsing with need as you fall forward and try to catch your breath. He is hard between your legs. You are both in need, yet somewhat fulfilled. You rake his hair, your head bowed next to his as you try to compose yourself.

“I want you to know I know,” he pants softly in your ear, his voice a growl. “I could have had you tonight. I could have taken you to my bed and that would be that. But the more I know you, the more I want your complete surrender, not a seduction.”

“Henry—”

He pulls you back slightly, and looks into your eyes as he whispers your name. “I believe good things come to those who wait, darling. That’s why I am a patient man, and I think you are a good thing.”

You hear your name called, jolting you from your memory.

“I don’t know what to do!” Stella says worriedly wringing her hands. “I got a job in catering, but I don’t have a place to stay yet! Everyone is in twos, and I don’t know what to do!”

“Maybe we can have her stay with us,” I suggest. “Maybe we can fit a third in with us.”

Hannah nods readily. “We’re at our rental now. Let’s see what we can do.”

The rental is set up like a dorm on one floor with two beds in each room and the other floor had single bedrooms that were so small one could barely turn around in it. You talk to the senior assistant, Michaela, and she basically says it’s up to us, but we may regret it.

You step outside to get air and look at the house and frown. Does that look like an attic or a…?

You race inside to Michaela. “Is the space over the garage taken?”

“Space? What space?”

You walk her outside and point. “That one.”

Michaela makes a call to the renter and finds out it is not furnished, but the bathroom and kitchen are equipped to work and the carpeting is down.

“If I furnish and decorate, may I have it?”

Michaela thinks you are crazy because that is way more than what you have agreed to pay, but gets an okay from everyone. Stella gives you her payment, and she takes your space. On a mission you set off to find what you need in a nearby town.

A guy named Archer and his brother Stuart from scenery decide to help you and Stella get the things you need, even set up the bed and couch for you. You only have two days before everyone had to be on set for work. Hannah opts out to help, but its understandable.

“You can tell me,” Stella whispers as she helps you hang the curtain to separate your bedroom area from your living room-kitchen. “You do know Henry Cavill, don’t you?”

You laugh, and say, “I went to a panel about his latest movie. I wish I knew the guy better!” That was no lie. You feel yourself giving in to him and you don’t know what to do. There was so much to consider since your last date one thing being if you know him well enough to really trust him.

“Well, if you did, this is going to be one interesting movie shoot.”

You frown. “Why do you say that?”

“Henry’s ex, Gracie Gray, is playing a role in this production,” Stella lets out a low whistle. “They were pretty hot and heavy at one time, so I guess it doesn’t matter.”

Your heart drops. Henry himself said he prefers women in the business; in fact, he seemed to have a habit of picking women based on that and proximity. The idea of being his flavor of the film tastes like bile to you and makes your stomach twist. You busy yourself with unpacking your things.

Stella turns you around. “Okay, what’s going on?”

“Nothing.” You say, but you feel a lump in your throat.

You finally finish the small living space aka hook up the wifi and TV. Happy with  the setup you log into Netflix. “Yes!”

“How much money you got left?” Stella asks as you both recline on the couch.

“Not much,” you sigh. “I’m gonna need this money to stay afloat.”

“It—” Stella looks around. “You did a great job—”

“We did a great job—”

“You measured the space, imagine possibilities and set it up in your mind,” Stella shook her head. “I can’t do that.”

“Yes you do it with food,” you argue softly. “Hannah does it with art.” Among other things, you amend silently. “I did it when I worked as an executive assistant in human resources for a company.” You chuckle at the memory. “Moving offices is a nasty business.”

“But I’d say this is the best space now,” Stella smiles. “And you have a private entrance! Maybe you can invite Archer up here sometime.”

Your eyes widen and you slap Stella playfully. “Archer? Come on, Stella—”

“He likes you,” Stella gives you a sideways shake. “It was so obvious.” She is quiet for a moment. “Unless you’re still thinking about the guy on the motorcycle-the look-alike?”

“He is a bit hard to forget,” you sigh, feeling bad for lying to Stella and promising yourself someday you’d come clean. “And time tells everything right?”

Stella crosses her legs on the table and closes her eyes to relax. “True enough. Let’s chill for a minute and then finish unpacking the kitchen, okay?”

You stare straight ahead. “Sounds like a plan.”

Things just got really simple or really complicated.

______________

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