#ben barnes fic

[captain-fantasy]

PLEASEEEE CONTINUE A CHAPTER OF MINE WITH BEN BARNESSS PLEASEEEEEEEEEEE IM BEGGING YOUUUUU

Surrender - Billy Russo x f!reader

Sequel to Mine which you can read here

Warnings: semi-public sex, unprotected sex, no review

author's note: giving the people what they want

The walk back home from the party was tense. You couldn’t shake off the weight of the words that had come out from Billy. The revelation of his feelings for you had affected you in ways you hadn’t expected. 

When you reached your apartment, neither of you said a word. Instead, you opened the door and shrugged off your coat, handing it to Billy so he could hang it on one of the hooks on the wall. Still in silence, you crossed the room and opened the doors to the balcony, stepping outside and letting the soothing night breeze brush against your skin, momentarily relieving the heat that had built up inside you throughout the night. Lost in your thoughts, you failed to notice when Billy approached you, his voice being the first to break the silence. 

“Mind if I join you?” he asked, his voice light. 

Startled, you turn to face him, momentarily at a loss for words. He wore an unreadable expression, his features concealed by the shadows of the night. 

“Of course,” you whispered, unsure if your voice was strong enough to speak normally. 

The two of you sat silently for a moment, the faint sounds of cars driving below and dull city noise from outside. 

“I think we need to figure out what we want,” Billy started.

Time seemed to stand still at that moment, the air heavy with tension. Billy’s intense gaze bore into your eyes, his black eyes reflecting a dark storm. There was a fire within him, a volatile mixture of emotions threatening to consume both of you. But behind that facade, you saw a vulnerability you’d never noticed. 

You reached out and placed a hand on his, the connection sparking an electric current that pulsed between you. “I agree,” you whispered, your voice filled with apprehension, “We can’t ignore what’s between us anymore.”

Billy’s gaze softened, the storm within his eyes receding to reveal a glimmer of hope. Slowly, he closed the distance between you, his hand caressing your cheek with a tenderness you hadn’t expected. The touch sent shivers down your spine, igniting a fire deep within your core. 

“I don’t know what came over me tonight, y/n. I think- Seeing you with Matt I-, It drove me crazy. I wanted you all to myself. I’m drawn to you; I have been since we met. Every night we’re together, I can’t get enough.”

Your heart swelled at his words, his vulnerability taking your breath away. At that moment, you realized the depth of his emotions, the intensity of his desire. It was a revelation that left you trembling, yearning for more. 

“Billy,” you whispered, your voice barely audible, “I feel the same way. Every minute without you feels like a part of me is missing. You complete me, Bill. Your hands, your eyes, your touch. I’m in love with every part of you.”

He leaned closer, his lips brushing against yours in a featherlight kiss that ignited a fire within you. It was an act of surrender, a melody of two souls finally finding harmony. The world faded away, and you were consumed by the intensity of your shared connection.

At that moment, time ceased to exist. Your bodies intertwined, moving with a rhythm that defied words. It was a language only you two understood, a symphony of desire and passion that painted the night with the colors of ecstasy.

Billy’s kiss got more insistent, needier. His hands had begun to slip underneath the hem of your skirt, tracing dangerously close to the wet spot in your underwear that had reappeared when he started touching you. Your skin felt like it was on fire, your breaths were short, and Billy’s beard left a slight burn while he bit at the skin on your neck. Your breathing quickened, and your head turned to reveal a nearly empty street. Suddenly, you were aware that you were still technically in public, and anyone who looked at your building would receive an eyeful from you and Billy. 

“Bill-hey, maybe we shouldn’t do this here-”

“Tell me to stop,” he murmured against your skin. His lips had begun to travel down your body, leaving fresh marks on your chest and neck. He pushed the material around your thighs as he met your waist, letting it bunch above your hips, allowing better access to where he wanted. He could see the effect he had on you for the first time. The wet spot on your underwear had gradually grown, making Billy smirk at how easily he could mold you into putty whenever he touched you. 

“Please, Billy,” you whined. Your fingers brushed through Billy’s hair, trying to pull him where you wanted him the most. Your neediness made him chuckle, his eyes staring up at you while he placed a soft kiss and licked your clothed clit. 

His nails scratched your skin as he pulled your almost entirely soaked-through panties down your legs. Billy gathered some of the wetness that had begun to drip onto your thighs with his index finger, pushing it into you and grazing over your clit. Your head fell back as he slid his tongue into your entrance, spreading it flat before dragging it up, driving you crazy. 

The moans he was letting out vibrated through your entire body, focusing on your clit as he sucked it between his teeth, using one hand to expertly curl his fingers into your sopping entrance while the other held onto your thigh to keep you still. 

Your whines became short and breathy as you tried to muffle them, hands tightly gripping the railing to keep yourself from falling over. You finally felt a sweet release as it poured out of you, allowing Billy to drink it. You were sure that if you let go of the railing, your legs would completely give out underneath you, so you decided it was best to keep your grip on it. 

Once Billy decided he had sufficiently cleaned you up, he stood up, towering over you, his eyes black and hooded, full of lust. He kissed you again, this time tenderly, sweetly. You could taste yourself on him when he slipped his tongue into your mouth, delicately exploring yours as if it were new terrain for him. You could feel his bulge through his pants. Deciding to be bold, you slipped your hand under his waistband, smiling when you heard him make a strained moan. He was painfully hard as he stared at you, silently begging you for more. 

You slipped his pants down just enough to pull his length out, your soft palm massaging the precum out of his cock. You released your grip on the balcony railing, moving it to rest on his shoulder, pulling him close to you. His hands were stationed on your waist, his sight focused on the dirty image of his cock diving into you. Your moans synchronized when he was entirely inside you, allowing you to feel every vein and twitch of his cock, a luxury you weren’t awarded earlier in the night when he roughly pounded into you in a stranger’s bedroom. 

This was different, something you hadn’t experienced with him. It was full of love. Every touch, kiss, and heavy breath showed you there was more to Billy than you thought. 

These thoughts faded when you felt yourself on the brink of orgasm again. Billy’s sloppy thrusts and tight grip on you showed you he was close too but insisted on holding off until you came first. Relief wasn’t far, though, as you came almost instantly when his cock touched your g-spot perfectly, causing every hair on your body to stand up and warmth to wash over you like warm water. He finished soon after you, his hips slightly stuttering before fully pushing himself in you, tight ropes of cum filling your belly. 

As your breathing regulated, you looked up at him, your chests becoming in sync. His eyes, once filled with the intensity of passion, now held a new warmth, a tenderness that wasn’t there mere minutes ago. The streets were hushed, the echoes of your shared ecstasy slowly dissipating. 

You traced a finger along his jawline, marveling at the subtle changes in his expression. The rugged exterior he often wore was gone. Instead, it was as if the layers of his past were shed, revealing a man desperate for connection. 

“I never expected this,” he whispered, his voice laced with awe. “To feel this connected to another person again.”

You smiled, your heart brimming with affection. You couldn’t find any words that would describe your love, but you figured you would have time to show him. 

As you sat there, bodies still intertwined, you knew that this moment was the beginning of a new chapter. You nestled closer to Billy, your bodies finding comfort in each other’s embrace. In the serenity of that shared embrace, you knew that whatever lay ahead, you would be doing together. 

buy me a ko-fi?

[nexusnyx]

This is for your sleepover. I am just being a menace knowing what this prompt could cause. I am requesting a fic. Work at all your leisure.

So it is a request for a Dark! King Caspian. Prompts

"i thought i could trust you." "and whose fault is that?"

their breath hitching whenever the other gets a little closer

Maybe if you would like some background

Reader was Caspian's friend that has helped him even after everyone has told them he was a lost cause. But Reader is in love and keeping it from him. But that's just a suggestion you work your own magic.

Okay, we spoke about this and I told you what people have no clue about, but Prince Caspian was my first fictional boyfriend. My first man. I haven't written him in ages and this might genuinely tingle parts of my brain that were long forgotten, but I can't wait. Here we go, Ellie. — main masterlist | 🏷️: Dark!King Caspian, life-long best friends, friends to enemies to lovers to 'friends', pining, mentions of smut, unresolved sexual tension; [WC: 1.4k]

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ˗ˏˋ꒰ i was never there ꒱

Peace among the Telmarine Kingdoms came at high prices that one but he, the King, was ready to speak for or own up to. It came at the cost of what sometimes felt like his soul if he still believed in those.

Most of the time, you stood by his side as Caspian chose whatever he must.

As his Counselor, you knew what no one else in the world did.

As his friend, you saw what even Caspian himself tried to hide. And as his lover... well—that part was long gone. But you remembered it. What it was like, having the pieces of him that reminded you of the Caspian that once was. Having the pieces of the King, who reminded you of who you kept falling for. Being trapped by.

Caspian won you back by saying Narnia would collapse without you.

Back then, a couple of years ago, he went into the woods in search of you after the fallout you two had and whispered the words you longed to hear for a long time. "I can't do this without you. Come back to me. You know it's different with us—you know... it's us."

“I’ll come back under one condition.”

“Anything.” The way Caspian uttered words changed after he became King. After power dripped off his shoulders as if his cloaks and clothes carried magic unknown by everyone else.

“It’ll be different. I’m not—your Consort.” The way you spit out the word carried your shame, the memories, and his taste. “Don’t turn me into one. Not again.”

Instead of nodding along, Caspian took his time before answering. He looked around your tent, looked you up and down as if searching for the answer in your body — as he had many times before — and then, after tense seconds of silence, he nodded, solemn. “I won’t.”

You knew the roundtable were still in talks to marry him to Ramandu’s daughter. Two years of absence and that was yet to change.

Caspian’s stubbornness was as iconic as his sword.

But if he would marry her—and he would, for there was no doubt about the best choice for Narnia’s King, then you would stay clear of his chambers.

“You’ll advise me. Go back to your place by my side.” He spoke in absolutes, and it made you remember that now, you had to look straight into his eyes when he spoke, and not the curve of his lips. Not the dark feathers surrounding his neck, or the secrets he hid in the corner of his mouth.

“So it is.”

It lasted months.

Months of Caspian showing you how much he had changed — so much power, how could one being carry so much power within them — and yet, how much he was still the same. The sudden bursts of playfulness when the two of you were alone in the private gardens of the castle. The knowing looks and entire conversations he was able to carry with you over people’s heads in balls, meetings, encounters. All of that, and the sizzling, almost-alive energy that you two generated when you got too close.

That went nowhere.

“Where did you go?” He asked you in rose garden once. You two had practiced the shortsword together long enough to be dripping in sweat, so you sat under a willow tree and watched as Caspian laid his body by your feet, resting his head on his hand. “None of my soldiers could find you for too long.”

“Narnia is a big place,” you answered. Being difficult with him was a pastime you never grew out of.

Caspian rolled his eyes. “I’m happy your time away in mysterious place never robbed you of your difficultness.”

“How could it? I was born with it.”

Caspian smiled. One of those rare and gorgeous smiles. “I said that when I was a teenager. Will you ever let it go?”

“Never.” That memory was etched into you. Tattooed on the walls of your brain, along with the first kiss of his lips on yours that followed those words.

The air sizzled slightly, and you knew the topic etched too close to dangerous waters.

“And you—did you learn anything about battling with more than one weapon or are we done here?”

It was good enough of a distraction.

The battlefield became your only escapade. The only place you two could be near each other, close, touching, and the hitches on your breath or soft gasps that escaped your lips could be passed by something else other than it was.

A storm, brewing in the distance.

He’d promised you that he’d keep his distance. Caspian promised to respect your wished, but Caspian lied before.

A few days after that, and he brings you back to where you were before running away. 

Harvest festivals were a time of drunkenness, stupidity, accidents.

As his Counselor and one of his first Knights, it meant hours of boring work—being one of the few sober people in a castle full of drunks and high folks was not only tiresome, it was annoying.

When he comes to you offering a glass of — you check with your nose, humming along — absinthe, and his pipe, you think, at least this. At least a little bit of peace.

You two talk for a while. Hushed tones, poised faces. People pass by and greet, sometimes stopping to try and participate, but as always, they feel left out after a while. Nothing and no one can quite keep your pace—you and Caspian developed your own rhythm years ago, and that only worsened with the years.

When he asks to go up to the meeting room, it’s past the peak of night. It must be only a few hours before sunrise, and you think—’the guards can finish this’. So you go up. 

Conversation about the trip to Poppy Fields is so good that you almost miss it.

His eyes on you, heavy and meaningful. The long sips he takes of his glass, and how his voice lowers.

When you do register, it’s because of proximity. You’re standing in front of his bookshelf, checking the new addition titles he acquired in your absence, and then, his presence covers your back like a dark cloud.

You shiver, breath hitching once again. Caspian’s close. Too close for a conversation, and the silence that comes with it makes it known for the both of you.

This proximity’s dangerous, and it makes a knot climb up your throat. 

He’d promised.

Frozen, you stand there in silence, your words forgotten and the topic of the conversation unknown to you, carried away by the wind. All you can feel is how his chest is only a couple of inches away. He removed his cloak, leaving only his white blousy tucked in his pants, and know what he looks like without taking a glance back.

“You promised me.” It comes out as a sad, choked whisper.

He knows you’re too weak to ever want to push him away. “I did.” He sounds surprised. Not at breaking his promise, but that he did one in the first place. Caspian’s hands find your waist, and they might as well be balls of fire for the way they burn through your clothes, warming the skin under. “I tried.”

He had. Both of you had, you knew.

"I thought I could trust you." To try harder. To keep your promise.

Caspian chuckles at that, dark and low. His face inches closer, his lips ghosting over your ear in that way he knows makes you weak— "And whose fault is that?" With those words, he pulls your body flushed against his, and then brings his lips to your neck, leaving a wet trail of kisses that goes from under your ear to the column of your throat.

Caspian lied before, but never to you.

But then again, if you thought about it, he had promised long ago that he would never hide what he really feels for you. He promised that first.

You spin around in his arms when Caspian’s teeth sink against you, and bury your moan in his mouth, surrending entirely to the ocean of him and everything you missed. You’re shaking, hands trembling and chest panting, but so is he.

Neither of you will make past the table this first time, but this table had seen your naked body before, and it had seen its King falling apart by your hands.

This was your fault. And his. And you two were guilty, willingly, together. Over and over again.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ* . join my Fireplace celebration. * | send me mail 💌

[sergeantbuckybarnes]

jealousy, jealousy // ben barnes

Summary: Ben was eager to catch the latest episode of your tv show. However, a surprising scene featuring you and your co-star sparked a heated argument.

Pairing: Ben Barnes x Reader

Word count: 3.6k

Warnings: jealousy, insecurities, angst, implied smut, a bit suggestive at the end but nothing too graphic

A/N: As always, remember English is not my first language. This isn’t proofread, so I apologize for any grammatical errors this may have

main masterlist  |  ben barnes masterlist

It was Friday. 

And that meant it was movie night with your boyfriend.

From the early stages of your relationship, you both established a beautiful tradition of spending Friday evenings in the cozy confines of your apartment, indulging in a delightful combination of film, pizza, and delectable treats.

This tradition had become an unwavering commitment over the past three and a half years— a steadfast ritual that neither of you dared to skip.

Even when circumstances forced you to be apart, such as being away filming, you still respected this tradition. You would connect via Skype or Zoom, syncing up the start of the movie in your respective locations. As the film played out on your screens, you would engage in lively discussions, intertwining conversations about the movie with updates on your day.

You guessed it was one of the things that made your relationship work so well — the commitment and the effort you both put in right from the beginning.

In the early days, your friends warned you that dating another actor would be a recipe for disaster. They believed that the constant filming and conflicting schedules would pose insurmountable challenges, leaving little room for quality time together. But those naysayers couldn't have been more wrong. 

Your relationship with Ben flowed so easily. Of course, there have been setbacks along the way, but you have faced them together. Like a team.

And you have never been happier. 

He understood you on a level that no one else did. He listened to your thoughts, your dreams, and your fears without judgment or interruption. With him, you felt comfortable opening up about anything and everything, knowing that he would always provide a safe space for you to share. He seemed to know your needs before you even expressed them, always anticipating how to make you feel loved and supported. He was attentive, empathetic, and patient, consistently demonstrating that he genuinely cared about your happiness. It was refreshing and exhilarating to actually feel seen and heard. He was everything you had ever wanted in a romantic partner.

Now, going back to your movie night… Things weren’t going the way you expected.

“I thought we could bend the rules a bit tonight,” Ben suggested once you were settled on the couch, pizza at the ready, and Netflix on the screen.

Intrigued yet cautious, you paused your scrolling and fixed your gaze on him. “What do you mean?” you asked, confused, not understanding what he meant.

His arm casually draped over the back of the couch as he got closer to you; his eyes sparkled with mischief, and a mischievous grin played on his lips.

You could tell he was up to no good.

“Maybe we could watch a TV show instead?” he suggested, the innocent tone of his voice didn’t match his face. “Your show. The latest episode aired just yesterday,” he clarified. 

A groan escaped your lips. “Really, Ben? You know I don’t like to see myself on TV.”

But then, he unleashed his puppy dog eyes and his best pout, and you were completely under his spell. 

It was as if his eyes held an invisible power, drawing you closer and coaxing a smile from your lips. Surrender was inevitable; his adorable charm had effortlessly won you over.

You rolled your eyes. “Alright.” You accepted the surrender.

A triumphant grin spread across his face as he pumped his fist in the air, a glimmer of excitement shining in his eyes. He eagerly pulled you closer, wrapping you in his embrace, and planting a tender kiss on your lips.

This was another thing you loved about your boyfriend—how supportive he was of your career. It didn't matter if your roles were small in movies, TV shows, or any project you were part of; he was always genuinely thrilled to see them. He was genuinely proud of every accomplishment you made, no matter how big or small. The sight of his radiant smile as he watched you on-screen never failed to fill you with immense joy. His unwavering support was a constant reminder that you were truly blessed to have him in your life.

You were the same with him. Just as he cheered you on in your acting career, you reciprocated his unwavering support in his. From the smallest role to the most significant breakthrough, you were always there, eagerly anticipating his performances on the big screen. The excitement in your heart swelled as you witnessed his talent come alive, immersing yourself in the characters he portrayed.

You cherished the moments when you saw him on screen—the familiar sound of his voice, the spark in his eyes, and the passion he brought to every role. His talent captivated you, just as it did to countless others. And with each new project he took on, your admiration for his craft grew deeper.

It wasn't just about the successes. You were there for each other during the auditions, the callbacks, and the moments of self-doubt. You provided the other a shoulder to lean on, offering encouragement and reminding each other of your incredible talent when you both needed it most. You understood the industry's ups and downs, and your belief in your abilities never wavered.

“Alright, alright,” you chuckled, gently pushing him back as he started peppering your face with sloppy kisses. “I’ve already agreed; no need for bribes.”

Ben chuckled and planted one last peck on your cheek before settling comfortably on the couch. He grabbed the remote and switched the streaming platform, searching for your show.

The show was called ‘Behind Closed Doors’. It delved into the tumultuous life of Amelia Hartfield, a young woman forced into an unwanted marriage with Sebastian Whitmore, the scion of a wealthy family, all due to dire financial circumstances. Not only did Amelia harbor reservations about this union, but her own sister harbored a forbidden love for her soon-to-be husband and was willing to go to any lengths to eliminate her as a rival. 

As the opening credits rolled on the screen, Ben's leg began to bounce with fervent anticipation.

“Why are you so excited? It’s just me.”

Ben turned to you with a playful grin. “It’s not just you. It’s Amelia and the mess her life is. She was forced to marry a man she doesn’t love, and, in case you haven’t watched the episode from last week, which you haven’t, her sister tried to kill her! If it wasn’t because Sebastian was there, she would be dead!”

You chuckled. “You know she can’t die, right? She’s the main character.”

He playfully rolled his eyes. “Always so humble.”

“Anyways, Sebastian admitted to his friend that his feelings for Amelia are genuine. And guess what? Isabella, Sebastian's childhood friend who secretly harbored feelings for him, overheard his confession. And at the end of the episode, she joined forces with Amelia's sister to hatch a sinister plan to end Amelia's life.”

You found it amusing how he narrated the story as if you weren't already familiar with every twist and turn.

“I think you got yourself too invested in this show,” you chuckled, attempting to snatch the remote from his grasp. “You’re starting to take this to another level.”

“No, no. I promise I won’t get too caught up! I promise!” He gripped your waist tightly, and you couldn’t help but laugh at his childish antics.

Gently extracting yourself from his tight grasp, you managed to retrieve the remote from his hand and playfully held it out of his reach. “Alright, Mr. Overly Enthusiastic, let's watch the episode. But you better behave, or I’ll turn it off.”

Ben's eyes sparkled with mischief as he feigned innocence. “I always behave. I promise to keep my reactions in check.”

You settled back on the couch, leaning against Ben's side as he draped his arm around your shoulder.

As the episode unfolded, you started to regret agreeing to watch it. You remember filming it. At the end, your character, Amelia, and Sebastian, who was portrayed by Bill Skarsgård, laid bare their emotions and consummated their desires in a rather explicit manner, devoid of any subtle undertones.

Both being actors, you and Ben came up with a mutual agreement to disclose whenever a steamy scene was to be filmed. This arrangement was born out of a desire to fortify the foundation of trust between you both. And so, even if it is acted, no one wants to see their partner being intimate with someone else. You both have followed this rule for years, but for some reason, you forgot to mention this scene to Ben. And you knew it was going to lead to an awkward and uncomfortable moment, and, quite possibly, into a fight you didn't want to have.

It was too late to turn it off now.

As the scene unfolded on the screen, a knot formed in your stomach. You could sense the tension building, knowing that the explicit nature of the scene would undoubtedly make things awkward between you and Ben. Your gaze discreetly darted towards him, studying his reactions with keen interest.

At first, he appeared engrossed in the storyline, his eyes fixated on the screen. But as the scene progressed, his expression shifted, and you could see a flicker of discomfort in his eyes. His grip on your shoulder tightened ever so slightly, and you knew he had realized the nature of the scene.

A whirlwind of emotions swept through your mind. On one hand, you empathized with Ben's potential unease, realizing that you would feel the same if the roles were reversed. On the other hand, a pang of guilt pierced your heart for neglecting to give him a heads-up about the explicit content. You desperately wanted to shield him from any unnecessary discomfort.

When the episode ended, you reached for the remote and turned off the TV. Swallowing your own apprehension, you took a deep breath and mustered up the courage to address the situation. “Honey... I'm sorry. I should have told you about this scene beforehand. It completely slipped my mind.”

Ben's face remained impassive, his gaze deliberately averted from yours as he digested your words. A heavy silence settled between you, filled with unspoken tension. The air in the room suddenly felt thick, and you could sense his growing frustration.

Finally, he let out a sigh and turned to face you, his expression tinged with disappointment. “You should have told me, Y/N. We made a promise, remember? To always let each other know about intimate scenes in our projects. I thought we had each other's backs.”

Guilt washed over you as his words sank in. He was right. You had broken the agreement you both had made, and now you were facing the consequences of that oversight. You had let him down, and the weight of your mistake hung heavily in the room.

“I know, Ben,” you said, your voice filled with remorse. “I messed up, and I'm truly sorry. It was an oversight on my part, but I truly forgot. I understand why you're upset, and I want you to know that I didn't do it intentionally. I value our trust, and I don't want to jeopardize it.”

Ben's gaze softened slightly, but his disappointment was still evident. “Trust is important to me, Y/N. It's the foundation of our relationship, both on and off the screen,” he expressed, his voice carrying a tinge of sorrow. “When we made that agreement, it was about ensuring that we never had to see each other being intimate with someone else. It's not just about the physical act, but the emotional impact it can have.” 

For a brief moment, you thought this would be solved without an argument, but then he spoke again.

“I mean, do you think it was fun for me watching you naked, moaning under Bill Skarsgård while you seemed to actually enjoy it?”

“Actually enjoy it? Are you serious right now?” You raised your voice, your body heating up with anger. “I can't believe you would even suggest that I found any pleasure in that scene,” you fired back, your frustration seeping into your words. “As an actor, it's my job to portray the character and the emotions they go through. Just because it looked intimate on screen doesn't mean it was enjoyable for me. You, of all people, should understand this. It was a professional commitment, and I take my work seriously.”

Your heart raced with a mix of anger and hurt. You had always been open and honest with each other, but this situation was testing the boundaries of trust and understanding. The fact that Ben would question your commitment to the relationship and your professionalism stung deeply.

“Oh, so I’m the problem now? I’m the one overreacting?”

You let out an exasperated sigh. “That’s not what I said. Are you even listening to me?”

“I’m listening. And you’re acting as if it’s okay that you filmed this and didn’t tell me about it.”

“I’ve already told you that I forgot!”

“It’s a sex scene, Y/N! How on earth does something like that just slip your mind?” His body tensed, and he began pacing the living room, intensifying the already charged atmosphere.

The room crackled with mounting tension as Ben's frustration reached its peak. His restless footsteps reverberated, amplifying his exasperation. The sheer force of his anger seemed to permeate the air, causing a tumult of emotions to swirl within you.

“I mean, come on, Y/N,” Ben continued, his frustration evident in his voice. “Bill Skarsgård is like every woman's fantasy. He's tall, handsome, and let's not forget those intense blue eyes of his. It's no wonder women all over the world swoon over him.”

You crossed your arms, annoyance bubbling up inside you. “Are you seriously comparing yourself to Bill? Is that what this is about? You being jealous?”

Ben stopped in his tracks, his eyes narrowing as he glanced at you. “You can't deny that he’s attractive, can you? I mean, let's be real here. He's a Hollywood heartthrob, and women drool over him.”

“Don’t make this about Bill or any other external factors. This is between you and me. I'm committed to you, and my love and dedication for you don't waver just because I have to portray intimate scenes on screen.”

“Is it just an intimate scene, or there’s more to it, Y/N?” Ben's frustration seemed to dissipate slightly, replaced by a hint of vulnerability in his eyes. He paused for a moment before speaking again, his voice softer this time. “You and Bill have spent a lot of time together on set, and it's natural for connections to form. Do you think he sees you solely as a friend and co-star?”

You let out a heavy breath, recognizing the depth of his insecurities. “Ben, I understand why you might have these concerns, but I want to assure you that my relationship with Bill is strictly professional. We work together, we act together, but that's where it ends. Just as I have complete trust in you, I expect the same trust from you. Accusing me of having feelings for Bill based on a scene we filmed is unfair.”

Your words hung in the air, the weight of the situation becoming more apparent. The room fell into silence as both of you processed the intensity of the argument. You could see the conflict in Ben's eyes—a battle between his insecurities and his love for you.

He let out a frustrated sigh, his voice laced with desperation. “I know it's irrational, but I can't help but imagine all the things that could happen on set. You think I haven’t seen the comments of people praising your chemistry? Emotions can get blurred. It scares me, Y/N.”

Tears welled up in your eyes as you listened to your boyfriend’s words. You had never seen him like this before, vulnerable and scared. It broke your heart to see the person you loved so deeply consumed by jealousy and fear.

Drawing nearer to him, you reached out and gently took his hand in yours, hoping to offer him some comfort. “Honey, I understand that it's natural to feel insecure sometimes, especially in our line of work. But you have to trust me when I say that my heart belongs to you and you alone. There is no one else who holds the place you do in my life.”

Ben's grip on your hand tightened, and his gaze met yours, searching for reassurance.

“Ben, you are more than enough for me, and I love you with all my heart. I chose you, and I choose you every single day. I want to build a future with you, and nothing will ever change that,” you continued, your voice filled with sincerity. “I can't control what others say or the fantasies they may have, but I can assure you that my feelings for you are unwavering. I'm committed to our relationship, and I want us to face any challenges together. If you ever feel insecure or have concerns, I'm here to listen and support you.”

Tears trickled down Ben's cheeks as he listened to your heartfelt words. The weight of his insecurities seemed to lessen, replaced by a glimmer of hope in his eyes.

“I'm sorry, my love,” he whispered, his voice filled with remorse. “I let my fears get the best of me, and I allowed them to cloud my judgment.”

You gently brushed away his tears, your touch soothing. “We all have moments of insecurity, and it's okay. What matters is that we address them and work through them together.”

Ben nodded, his eyes filled with love and relief. “I never want to lose you, Y/N,” he admitted with a shaky voice. “You're my everything.”

“And you're mine,” you whispered before pulling him into a warm embrace.

A sensation of calm rushed through you as you held each other tight. At that moment, the world seemed to melt away, leaving only the two of you in a cocoon of serenity.

“Besides,” you began as you stepped back, “Bill doesn’t stand a chance next to you.”

“And why’s that?” He asked, raising an eyebrow, his voice tinged with curiosity.

“Well, by now, you should already be aware that I like my men with floppy dark hair, beautiful dark eyes, and, most importantly… British.”

A soft chuckle escaped Ben's lips, his eyes twinkling with delight. “Ah, so it's the accent that does it for you, huh?”

You nodded, playfully poking his side. “Absolutely. It's impossible to resist.”

He pulled you closer, his arms enveloping you in a warm embrace. “Well, lucky for me, I happen to possess that irresistible quality. Though, I must warn you, it can be quite addictive.”

A genuine smile blossomed on your face, the warmth of the moment washing over you. “Yes, you definitely do.”

Ben’s lips drew closer to yours, the warmth of his breath brushed against your cheek, causing your heart to quicken in response. With a gentle touch, his lips grazed yours, leaving behind a tantalizing blend of mint and his unmistakable essence, intoxicating your senses.

Breaking the kiss, you couldn't resist the mischievous grin that crept onto your lips.

“Oh, and have I mentioned what an exceptional kisser you are? You certainly have a way with it,” you playfully teased, wiggling your eyebrows suggestively. 

A chuckle escaped him, his cheeks turning a shade of crimson. “You're really boosting my ego here, sweetheart.”

“Just stating the facts... Oh, and should I also mention your incredible skill with your hands, like—”

He cut you off, closing the gap between you again. His lips molding perfectly against yours, as if they were made for each other. And in a surge of fervor, the kiss deepened, growing more passionate and filled with intensity.

Your fingers traced the contours of his face, while his touch ignited a fire within you, sending shivers down your spine.

With a swift motion, Ben's strong arms enveloped your thighs, effortlessly lifting you off the ground. You eagerly wrapped your legs around his waist, feeling an exhilarating surge of warmth and electricity pass between you. His hand tightened its grip on your body as your kiss intensified, and your fingers instinctively tangled themselves in his hair. A soft moan escaped his lips as you tugged gently on his silky locks.

Reluctantly, you broke the kiss, your foreheads lightly brushing. Both of you were left breathless, but your hearts overflowed with contentment. The worries and insecurities that had clouded your conversation melted away.

“I love you,” he breathed, his words melting against your lips.

“I love you too, Ben,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper. “You mean the world to me.”

He lowered you back to the ground, but his arms remained securely wrapped around you. 

“Wanna watch that movie like we originally planned?”

Your boyfriend shook his head. “I have other ideas in mind.”

You noticed the glint of mischief sparking in his onyx eyes. 

“Oh, and what would those ideas be?” You inquired, playing along.

A devilish smile played on his lips as he leaned in, planting a trail of kisses on your neck. The intensity of his touch awakened a fiery passion within you.

“You, in bed, naked, under me… and on top of me. In any position…No limits, no boundaries. Just pure, unadulterated pleasure,” he murmured, his voice low and husky against your ear.

Heat flushed through your body. Your heart pounded in your chest, sending a thrilling shiver down your spine at the mere sound of his words. The rush of excitement that overwhelmed you was intoxicating.

"Sounds like a perfect plan to me," you whispered, your voice filled with desire.

He lifted you effortlessly into his arms again, and carried you toward the bedroom where passion consumed both of you for the rest of the night.

[padfootagain]

Deeper Love

Hello everyone ! Here is another request that was made for my 6k event by @pinchofhoney : “hello!! i just wanted to congratulate you once again! you’re amazing writer and as i already said – you deserve every of these follows!!<;33

of course, i’d love to take part in your event!! can i have a ben barnes with friends with benefits to lovers? 🙈

thank you so much! and have a great day (or night, if you’re reading this right now hahah)”

Thank you so much for your request! I hope you like this little piece!

Hope you all like this fic. Tell me what you think :)

****

Pairing: Ben Barnes x reader

Warnings: angst, fluff, NO ACTUAL NSFW BUT MENTIONS OF SEX SO NO MINORS HERE!!

Summary: Ben and you have been friends with benefits for a few months. And it was all fun and game, until feelings got into the fray…

Word Count: 3362

Ben Barnes’ Masterlist – Main Masterlist

Ben watched you getting dressed. It was a sight he had grown accustomed to, it was almost familiar, really. Slipping your bra on, your underwear, your blue jeans… He watched you fix your hair in the mirror, studying your reflection until you were satisfied. He knew all about your morning routine, from the temperature of your shower, the time spent brushing your teeth, to your favourite food for breakfast.

It was almost domestic at this point. It was forming habits. Like the spare toothbrush in his bathroom, and his extra pair of jeans in your drawer.

And yet you weren’t together. You were… just friends.

Just friends…

Only, with benefits. The benefits being sex, of course. Long nights spent in pleasure, in astronomical bliss. A solution, at first, to fulfil a pulsion, an urge you had both felt, an itch to be scratched. Nothing serious, nothing complicated, nothing to get attached to. Just two friends pleasuring each other. Nothing less, nothing more. It was the deal.

And it worked. For the first few weeks, it worked brilliantly. You were quickly at ease with each other, and your nights and mornings most definitely became filled with pleasure… and it was all going smoothly.

But then you left your toothbrush at his place, along with some perfume, some soap and a bottle of shampoo; because it was easier that way and you liked taking a shower with him.

And then he left his cologne at your place, a sweater and t-shirt, because it was simply easier to get ready without going back to his apartment.

And then, your usually-friendly activities took a more romantic turn. Holding hands in the dark room of a cinema, cuddling on the sofa, resting your palm on his thigh as he drove, his foot touching your leg as you ate dinner.

And then there was the shift between your intimate moments too. Learning every inch of the other’s body, every touch that turned into a shudder, every stroke that brought out a moan. And then the pleasure turned intimate, truly intimate when it started carrying affection, beyond pure bliss. Tenderness mingling with fervent thrusts, and hands clanging onto each other, shallow breaths broken in sync, connection in every meeting of lips, affection sipping in every new touch and flowing deeper in your hearts every time you saw stars.

And with every night spent together and every morning awakening in each other’s arms, Ben and you had grown closer, with having sex slowly evolving into making love.

Love… When did that word appear to define you?

As Ben leaned against the doorframe of his bathroom, arms crossed before his chest, hair still dishevelled after a shower with you, he tried to figure out when he became so attached.

After all, he was always attached to you. Because you were a friend, even before you became more than that. But when did he start feeling for you, in a romantic fashion?

Because he did. Feel. A stammer of the heart every time you looked at him, a breath caught in his throat every time you touched, a heartbeat skipped whenever you came into view… And a longing, furled right there, in his chest and stomach, an aching that never left, whenever you weren’t around, that was eased only by your nearness, only by a touch to make sure you were there.

He was in love with you. After four months of this arrangement, Ben was hopelessly, thoroughly in love with you.

And yet he was still holding onto this label. Just friends… with benefits.

The more he contemplated the situation, the more he reckoned that this label would lead to just friends with heartbreaks…

“Any plans for the weekend?”

You asked him as you turned towards the door, readjusting your camisole, the green one he adored, that fitted your form to perfection.

“Not much. You?”

“Not much.”

“Wanna go out on Saturday night, then? They’re making a James Stewart theme for this month at the cinema you like. You know? The one near your place…?”

But you cut him off with a shake of your head.

“Actually, I’m not free this Saturday.”

“Oh, okay. Going out with the usual gang of rogues?” he joked, referring to your friends. But you shook your head again.

“I have a date, actually.”

All of a sudden, every muscle of his body was taunt. His hand clasped onto his own arms, as if looking for support, but finding none. He was almost hugging himself at this point.

“Oh…” he breathed, and that was the only sound he could let out.

“Hmmm… with Stan. You know, my neighbour?”

“Your neighbour?”

“Yeah, the cute guy.”

“Oh… okay.”

You raised an eyebrow as you noticed the way he grew a little paler, the way he averted his eyes, the way he moved slightly away from you…

How could you have missed the signs, they were too obvious.

“We said we weren’t exclusive,” you pointed out, and Ben was terrible at hiding the way your words hurt.

You were right all the same.

“You’re right. I’m not saying anything.”

“You don’t seem thrilled by the idea.”

“We’re sleeping together.”

“Yes, I had noticed..”

“Have been for the past four months.”

“I am well aware.”

“We’re lovers.”

“Yes. And?”

“And… I don’t know. I like it that way.”

And the shrug you gave him in response finished to break his heart.

“I like it too. We’re… I think we’re very… compatible, when it comes to intimacy. But I want a real relationship. And we’ve agreed that what’s going on between us is not meant for the long run, it’s not to become serious.”

Slowly, Ben nodded.

“Yeah, we did.”

“I’m free on Sunday, though. We can go to the movies then.”

But Ben shook his head.

“I’ll be busy on Sunday. Lines to learn,” he answered elusively, and you knew he was lying, but you didn’t say anything about it.

“Okay, well… next week then.”

“Yeah… next week.”

But when you tried to walk past him, Ben held onto your arm, stopping you.

“If you start dating this guy… we should stop our arrangement.”

“Why? I haven’t had a date with him yet. It might go terribly wrong.”

“But if you want to start dating someone else, may it be him or anyone else, for that matter… we should stop.”

There was defiance in your stance as you answered, and Ben didn’t know what to make of it.

“What makes you think I haven’t dated anyone else these past few months?”

It took him a moment for the spinning to stop, for the world to be steady again. But then his rational brain kicked back in, and he shook his head with a frown.

“We agreed to tell each other that, at the beginning.”

“Did we?”

You knew the answer already, but he answered all the same, his tone bitter now, almost angry.

“Should I run a check-up, then? Should I get tested for something?”

You rolled your eyes, annoyed too.

“No,” you mumbled under your breath. “There was no one else.”

Ben’s heart gave a content jump, and he hated it.

“Right… there was no one else for me either.”

“There was no one else sexually,” you added, and he knew you were being mean, and probably lying. He still fell for it.

You regretted your words immediately when you saw a jolt of pain passing through his eyes, right before he could control his reaction.

“Right…”

“It’s nothing serious. Anyway… yeah, I guess we’ll have to stop if I like him and want to give him a chance. Do you have a problem with that?”

But Ben shook his head, jaw set and something a bitter, a little defiant burning in his black eyes.

“No, of course not. You’re a big girl. You can do as you please. Besides, you’re right… I should start looking for something serious again too.”

You nodded, slowly, glaring at each other now.

“You should.”

Before he could say anything else, you broke free and walked out of the bathroom.

When you aimed straight for the front door, though, picking up your shoes, Ben’s bitterness turned into sadness, almost desperation.

“Where are you going?”

“I’m working today.”

“Yes, but… you haven’t eaten anything.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“I’ve made your favourite pancakes…”

You paused, looked up at him. He didn’t seem angry anymore. He was even paler than before, the flush of annoyance replaced by the white of fear and disappointment. His tone was softer now, begging even. It screamed a silent message.

Stay. I’m sorry. Stay.

But you shook your head.

“I want to go to work early. I really need to leave. Thanks for the pancakes, though.”

For the last month-and-a-half, you and Ben kissed every time you met and whenever you parted. Not this time, though. This time, you turned your back to him, opened the door, and left without a single touch, a sweet word, or a brush of lips. Instead, you threw only coldness at him.

When the door closed, and Ben was left staring at nothing but an empty space, it felt like his entire world crumbled.

Slowly, a tear rolled down his cheek. He didn’t bother brushing it away.

Saturday night arrived, and with it an awful lot of tissues, ice cream, and Keira Knightley looking stunning while she chastised a proud Mr. Darcy.

After all, desperate situations called for desperate measures. So, as you were buried under a blanket on your sofa, you were getting ready for a lonely evening spent mourning a relationship that never existed in the first place and wallowing in your self-pity. Yes, that sounded like a good plan. A better one than your attempt at lying to Ben to make him react and talk about your relationship – or lack thereof – at least…

Of course, there was no date with your neighbour. How could there be one when you were hopelessly, madly in love with your best friend and current ‘casual lover’?

What kind of mess had you let yourself get dragged into when you agreed for this friends-with-benefits situation? It wasn’t as if you didn’t read books or watched movies… you should have known these arrangements always led to heartbreak.

You sniffed loudly, trying to focus on the movie but failing prodigiously to do so. Ben was all you could think of…

Since that morning at his apartment, he had not called, and you had remained just as silent. He didn’t care, clearly. Not like this. You were a damn fool…

You were dipping your spoon in your ice cream when you phone vibrated, and you checked the text you had received while Elizabeth was discovering what Darcy had done to her sister.

Your breath caught in your throat as you read the name on the screen… Ben.

Good evening. Are you still home? Or are you at your date already?

You bit your lip fiercely, hesitating. Judging by the time, you should indeed be on a date right now… should you lie?

You decided to be cautious.

Why are you asking?

His answer was a punch in the guts.

Because I’m in front of your door.

Please, if you’re in there, let me in. We need to talk.

You pressed your palm against your mouth to shush your squeal, turning towards your door. You didn’t even dare to move…

I can here the movie playing, I know you’re in there. Let me in.

Please, love, we need to talk.

But you shook your head as you answered his text.

I’m getting ready for my date, I can’t talk right now.

Silence. You stared at your phone but Ben wasn’t writing.

You jumped as he forcefully knocked at your door (or rather slammed his fist against it).

“Y/N? Please!”

He called for you a couple more times, and you had to give up, wanting to avoid the wrath of your neighbours…

You merely threw away your blanket, put the ice cream and tissues on your coffee table, and hurried to the door. You were wearing sweatpants and a large t-shirt, but you didn’t have time to change.

“Ben! Are you out of your fucking mind?!” you glowered at him as you opened the door just a few inches, hiding your body behind the wooden surface.

He frowned hard.

“Please, let me in.”

“No. I don’t want to.”

“What now? Are you afraid of me or something?”

Yes, you thought, I’m afraid of how much I love you while you feel nothing for me at all… I’m afraid you’re going to break my heart if I let you in.

“I don’t want to see you. I have to get ready for my date. I don’t have time right now…”

“Don’t go on that date.”

You frowned hard.

“What?”

“Please, Y/N. Don’t go on this date. Don’t date this guy.”

“Why not?”

You let out a bitter laugh.

“So you can keep fucking me when you feel lonely?”

Pain shot through Ben’s frame and face, and you hated yourself for causing such an emotion in him.

“So… it was truly just sex for you?” he asked, his voice shaking.

“Wasn’t it supposed to be just sex?”

“It hasn’t been just sex for months, Y/N. I thought you felt it too.”

You stared at each other, rendered breathless by the confession. Slowly, as if he were afraid that you would run away if he moved too fast, Ben took hold of the door, and gently pushed it open.

“Let me in. Please.”

You yielded, despite your better judgement, or perhaps simply despite your fear. He raised a surprised eyebrow at your outfit.

“I thought you were getting ready,” he breathed, closing the door behind him.

But you ignored his question, crossing your arms before your chest.

“I don’t understand what you want,” you admitted.

His answer was brutally honest, you were surprised by it.

“You. I want you.”

“But you said it would be too complicated. That’s why we came up with this arrangement…”

“I know. It was stupid.”

“This… us… it doesn’t exist. It’s just sex…”

But he frowned hard, walking closer, until he could reach for you, holding on your upper arms in a firm yet gentle hold.

���At first, yes. For about a couple of weeks. But it quickly became much more than that.”

“You always said…”

“We’ve already stated that I’m the most idiotic man on the planet, Y/N.”

“No, you’re not. That’s why it hurts a lot. Because you’re not stupid. Therefore, you just don’t feel anything.”

He opened, then closed his mouth in a hurry, as if catching himself.

You took his silence as an agreement, and as it broke, your heart became harder also. Your voice was cold as you spoke again, as you took a step back, freeing yourself from his hands.

“I think we should stop being friends with benefits. I don’t want that anymore.”

“Okay,” he agreed with ease, and you didn’t know what to make of the glitter of hope you saw sparkling in his dark eyes. “Let’s stop that. We could…”

“I don’t think we should see each other again.”

Your entire frame shuddered as you recognized fear and pain in Ben’s eyes.

“What?”

“I don’t want to see you again.”

Your voice was firmer than the way you felt. Ben’s lips trembled.

He blinked a couple of times, and then he was taking a step towards you again, chasing after you, holding you back…

“Look… I know that I’ve fucked up, okay? I know that… this was a bad idea, and we should have talked about it sooner. But I don’t want to lose you.”

You heaved a sigh. And it hurt as you let the words out, but Ben needed to hear them, just as much as you needed to release the feelings you had been withholding for too long.

“Ben… this can’t go on. It was fun at first, but I… the truth is, I have feelings for you. I want to be with you. Like… really with you. And you won’t give me that. So, I think we should stop seeing each other, before it breaks our hearts…”

“You’re already breaking mine.”

You stared at him, stunned, letting your guard down long enough for him to reach up to cup your face in his warm palms.

“Please, give me another chance,” Ben begged, his voice barely more than a whisper, and you could see tears shining in his eyes. “I should have told you sooner, but… I was afraid. I was afraid because I have feelings for you as well. And I want to be the one to take you on dates, not your neighbour, not anyone else…”

“You’re jealous?”

“Yes,” he admitted. “Yes, I’m jealous. I want you. I want no one else to kiss you or touch you and most certainly not have sex with you. I want… I want this. I want you.”

You could have fallen for it all, and you knew it, but you didn’t, even if you wanted to. Instead, you started to cry, broke free, shook your head.

“I can’t…”

“Yes, you can. We can do this…”

“You didn’t say anything when I told you I was going out tonight…”

“I wasn’t happy about it, and I reckon you noticed that.”

“You didn’t hold me back. You didn’t…”

You heaved a frustrated sigh.

“I’m in love with you, Ben,” you confessed, and it felt both liberating and dreadfully painful. “I… I don’t even have a real date tonight! I was just… I wanted to see if you wanted me, and you let me go…”

“I’m here tonight, aren’t I?”

You stared at him a little longer. He was dishevelled, out of breath. He looked desperate…

“I’m here,” he repeated. “And yes, again, it took me too long to move my stupid arse, but I’m here. And I… I love you.”

He let his words sink in, you looked at him with so much hope…

“I love you, Y/N,” he repeated. “I’ve been in love with you for a long time. It wasn’t just sex, not for me, it hasn’t been just sex for months. And you’re right, I held back, and kept on bringing up this stupid arrangement, because I was a coward. A proper coward. But I was always in love with you. And you were always more than a way to have sex. You were always so, so much more, Y/N. You were always in my head, and always in my heart and just… come on, you must have felt it. The way everything changed after a mere couple of weeks. The way I haven’t been fucking you in months but making love to you, every time.”

He ran a hand through your hair.

“Give me another chance. Come with me on a date tomorrow. Nothing too fancy, just us. I’ll make a picnic. I’ll take you to your favourite spot. I’ll do anything you want. I’ll beg if I have to. Give me another chance. We’ll do it properly this time around, I promise.”

“So… we’ll be exclusive?”

“Absolutely.”

“We’ll be officially together.”

“A couple, yes. I won’t have anything else anymore.”

“You won’t break my heart, will you?”

His gaze grew more tender.

“No, Y/N. I’ll just love you with every fibre of my being, that’s all.”

He leaned closer, until his forehead rested against yours. And you didn’t stop him, instead, you let him in.

“Okay, I want that too,” you nodded, nose bumping against his in the process.

He grinned, before kissing you, passionately, for a long, long time…

“So… no date tonight?” he asked with a raised eyebrow, finally noticing the movie playing, Elizabeth standing alone in the rain.

“No… just me and good old Mr. Darcy.”

“Want to order some pizza and watch the rest together.”

“Or we can watch it all over again from the start? A new beginning? A second chance?”

He grinned.

“Yeah… yeah, a second chance is all I want…”

And before you could speak again, he was kissing you and making you forget how to breathe.

******************************

Taglist : @sergeantbuckybarnes @reg-arcturus-black @wolfmoonmusic

[reg-arcturus-black]

The Room is on Fire, Invisible Smoke

Soft!Billy Russo x Female reader

Part 1/2

Warnings: fire, mentions of gun, hints of SA

Part 2 here

"Bill - Bills, I - I need you... your help. The room is spinning and there's smoke every where... I can't breathe... I am stuck Bills... "

You could hear a door close behind him on the phone - an assurance that he was on his way to you. You put your phone down and coughed into your pillow, burying your face into it to protect your eyes from the smoke.

It felt like you were going to pass out. You knew the room was on fire and that you needed to run but you could not bring yourself to stand up straight. It was too much. You could not breathe. It was as if your lungs had no clean oxygen left. Your eyes were watering from all the smoke. Your vision was blurry. It felt like you had nothing to hold on to and life was slipping away.

That is when you heard your door knob rattling.

"Y/N the door is locked... You need to come open it for me," he shouted through the door.

You sniffled and wiped your tears. You could hardly see the door in the heavy smoke. You wanted to reach out to him but didn't know how. Your legs had refused to work and you laid there helpless.

"Y/N, please. Help me help you..."

You could see how important it was for you to get up but you could not bring yourself to. What would be the point anyway? The doorknob would be too hot to even touch. You did not want to burn yourself. A little voice in your head told you that this was it. You turned your head back into the pillow and sobbed. You would not live to see your 27th birthday, or meet your nephew or finally show your colleagues how good you were at your job or tell Billy that -

There was a loud noise followed by a big thud. "Y/N?"You heard Billy call out.

You felt a dip in your bed and a pair of strong arms helping you sit up straight. The same person cupped your face gently, making you look at him - into his pitch black eyes that could pierce into your soul.

"Look at me Y/N," he said as softly as he could, afraid that even loud noises would be enough to break you at the moment.

Your eyes were red from tears and could barely look into his. He looked at you with so much love, so much gentleness, it was impossible not to melt. But you still could not breathe. Air was not reaching your lungs.

"I need you to focus on 5 things that you can see, baby. You don't have to say them out loud, just find them."

His eyes, his hands that were now holding your arms, his grey sweatshirt that you adored, the way his nose crooked a little bit in the middle and the ring on his last finger.

You gave him a nod, letting him know that you had five things in mind.

"You're safe, okay? I promise. Now focus on 4 things that you can taste."

You looked around desperately, but nothing seemed to come in focus. There was too much smoke. You could not find anything.

You shook your head, tears flowing down. "There's too much smoke, Billy. I - I can't"

"Y/N, I promise you're safe - "

You put your face into his chest, sobbing. "I don't wanna die, Bills..."

Sighing, he put his arms around you, trying to figure out a way to help you. "Do you want to leave this place?" He asked.

You had barely nodded into his chest when you felt his strong arms lifting you up and carrying you out. You did not turn away from him until you heard your bedroom door close and he sat you down on your living room couch.

You gave yourself a minute to look around, your French windows letting the sunlight in and falling on your brown marble floors was proof enough that you were safe. You could feel your lungs being cleared up as he kept a glass of water in front of you.

You did not look at him for the next two minutes. You did not know what to say or how to thank him. You knew there was no real fire or smoke in your bedroom and he knew that, too. He still made the efforts to come rescue you from the invisible smoke.

Wordlessly, you got up and put your arms around him, a gesture he reciprocated but not in the same manner. He was the first one to leave the embrace and walked out the door. Your well being was all that mattered to him.

You did not blame him. You remembered the fight as clear as day. He had asked you, pleaded you, requested you, ordered you, begged you, not to go with the random guy you had befriended at the bar 2 months ago. But you didn't care. If he was not willing to confess how he felt, then you weren't going to wait for him anymore either.

"Are you telling me that you are going to go away for the entire goddamn weekend with a guy you barely know? You met him at a bar, for fuck's sake, Y/N! Are you not thinking clearly?" He had screamed, his hands in his hair, pacing in your living room while you packed.

"Guess what, Billy?" You had answered just as harshly. "That's how people get to know each other! I am a big girl and I can take care of myself!"

You had huffed and zipped up your bag. "Is there anything else?" You had asked, hoping that he would ask you to stay. Not because he was concerned about your safety but because he wanted to be with you.

You had grabbed your keys and mobile phone on the way out without another glance at him. "Lock up behind you," you had said and left him standing there.

If he was being honest with himself, he regretted not stopping you or asking you out right then and there. But he had realised it was too late when he heard his car run out the drive way.

Sighing to himself, he had pulled out his phone to call you. Sure, he wanted to be with you but your safety was just as important. He did not trust the guy even one bit. The guy kept screaming 'danger' to him. If the situation would not have involved you, it would have been an intuition which he would have tracked down. But with you, he had to be careful.

That is when his eyes fell on your TV.

"Curtis," he had said dialling him. "You have a friend who works at the NYPD, right? I have a plate number. I need to see who this guy is."

The camera in the building's drive way had given him a very clear view. He had paced in your living room, waiting for Curtis to call him back. He fidgeted with your vases, the polaroids on your fridge until his eyes had landed on the one with him.

It was a simple picture. Nothing special. Just the two of you sitting together, beer bottles in hand, cheeks red, laughibg over something that would have been way too stupid. He had smiled fondly at the memory. It was a karoake night with Frank and Maria. Beer had made everyone think that Billy could actually sing but you... you were truly exceptional. There was not a note that you'd miss. You were beautiful... and he remembered undressing you with his eyes that night. Frank had to shake him to break him out his trance and remind him that you were in public.

He picked up his phone the second it rang, already out of your kitchen. "What is it, Curt?"

"It belongs to some Dr. Trent Ross. No previous records of any crime. Not even a parking ticket."

Billy finally relaxed a little. You had never mentioned his last name or what he did but that was because he had never bothered to ask.

"But this car was reported missing a month ago, Bills."

He had raced out of your house into his car and called one of his men to track your number. Wherever you were going, it wouldn't have been very safe with that guy.

He tried calling you but it went straight to voicemail. "Y/N, Hi. Billy here. You need to be - I am sorry, okay? Call me back please. It's urgent."

He could not have said anything that would make him suspicious. So he had to come after you himself. After almost an hour of driving, he still hadn't caught up to you and you were still going. He had cursed himself when he had to stop for gas but had closed the distance soon enough. Until your signal went out.

"No, no, no," he had muttered. He decided to reach the place where he could last see your location. He had never felt more helpless. He drove for a while until reaching a crossroad. No idea where you were.

Until he saw smoke rising. He was farther away from the city and could barely see. The only lights he had were his car's headlights. He drove as fast as he could, his heart beating faster with every moment.

He had to drive for 25 more minutes before he finally reached the cabin you two were staying at. It was a pretty large one with the fire confined to one side of it.

Silently thanking whoever was listening, he dashed out of the car, in through the wooden door. The fire had not spread yet but the smoke had. He called your name again and again. But no response came.

For a second, he had thought you and the guy had managed to escape but he heard someone coughing in a distant. His eyes burning and watering, he made his way upstairs.

And there you were. Cowering near the window, too afraid to even move.

"Y/N?" Billy had called out.

Your eyes fell on him and you had leaped into his arms.

"I am so sorry, Bills," you had sobbed into his shoulder as he lifted you up easily, tightening his grip around you. "I - I should have listened to you. I am so sorry. He accidentally heard your voice mail and got all weird and started asking me about you and then got really angry... and - and - I am so sorry, Bills," you were pretty sure you were ruining his favourite t-shirt with mascara and tears but you couldn't help it.

Seeing Billy was a breath of fresh air, quite literally, too. He was your silver lining, your rainbow and flowers after a thunderstorm and your bestfriend. He had started meaning something more but he refused to acknowledge that there was something between you. However, you could feel it. You could feel it in the way he always tucked you in when you would pass out drunk, the way he would never let anyone else get your drink, the way he would always drop and pick you up from the airport. You could feel it in the way he was holding you right then.

He had gently shook his head and made his way downstairs, still not letting go of you. Afraid that the fire in the other room would engulf you the moment your feet would touch the floor.

He was about to walk out the door with you when he had felt someone sneak up behind him. He dropped in his tracks and put you down. You did not want to let go of him but one look and you knew it was important.

"Go to my car and lock it from the inside," he had practically ordered after handing you his keys.

You nodded and sprinted out.

No sooner had you stepped out that Billy felt a gun at the nape of his neck.

"Finally," he heard a man say. "I had been waiting for this opportunity."

"What do you want from me?" He had replied calmly, without turning back. He knew that any and all quick movies could affect your safety.

"You are the reason my brother his dead," the man seethed. "Clain Stelk, remember?"

Billy's eyes widened in realisation. "Stelk was a trafficer who had it coming."

He remembered as vivid as day when you had come to his apartment running, half scared, half angry. A man had recently moved into the flat opposite yours and you knew something fishy was going on. People would come and go at weird times from his house. You had managed to click a picture of him on your phone. You had thought that he spotted you so you had rushed to Billy's place, confident that he would be able to figure it out. Or would know someone who could.

"He was my brother!" The man yelled into Billy's ears, snapping him out of his thoughts and pressed the gun further into his neck.

"I didn't realise you were an arsonist, too," he said, stalling enough to figure out a plan of action.

"I would have made better use of my time. But the bitch refused so I needed her to realise her mistake."

Billy hadn't take a second to turn around and punch him right in the guts. He knew why he was after him but you didn't deserve that. His heart ached for the way this guy must have treated you. And no body could ever disrespect you and your wishes and survive.

Before he could get up, Billy had pulled the curtains from the rod and wrapped it around him, making sure he didnt have access to his gun anymore. Carrying him out on his shoulders, he threw Stelk into the trunk of his car and locked it from outside. He would call the cops on the way back to the city. For now, your safety was more important.

When he turned around, you were already out of the car, watching his actions carefully. He had made his way slowly to you and pulled you in, breathing in your familiar scent.

You allowed yourself to be comforted by him. You were safe. For now.

-----------

Let me know if you wanna be notified for part 2! It'll be a lot more angsty.

[don-daygamerz]

Ben Barnes x reader who's in her 20s and Ben likes her one day he couldn't control himself and says it like "I know I'm older but I still love you" idk something like this?!?

Hi sorry for the delay, I'm on break from taking requests but I'm not going to abandon your request. So here's a taste of the dynamic between Ben and (Name) as I figure out what to put together. Just some headcanons whilst I work on your story.

- (Name) being a Young millennial/Millennial Z.

- I can imagine reader being an Actress and a singer herself rising through the ranks due to her unique talent.

- Ben and (Name) first met through mutual friends.

- In fact, they met at the Troubadour where Ben was actually performing that night.

- (Name) was also invited to perform as well.

- My girl did Rock music. And did she have some serious pipes.

- Ben could not look away from her performance. He thought she looked so ethereal but at the same time so enticing under the blue and dim lighting of the stage.

- The way she strummed her guitar to impossible notes made her look like a Metal Goddess.

- When the show was over Ben had the chance to introduce himself through a friend of his who conveniently knew her as well.

- He felt shy to approach such an intimidating but captivating young woman.

- He found her to be very attractive and quite adorable actually. With her highlighted hair, smokey eyeshadow with glitter, dressed in a black sheer lace top with a dark bra underneath and a pair of dark jeans and laced doc marten boots.

- Immediately fast friends when they started exchanging dirty jokes (Ben can be a hound dog for sure).

- Ben enjoys to cook and share with his friends and after getting to know (Name), he's insistent that she joins him for dinner (with some friends, of course...it wasn't a date...not yet).

- When she first came to dinner she brought over some special dessert from her culture (Whatever ethnic background she is; I'd imagine it being Flan/Basbousa/Avocado ice cream/Ube cake...etc. could be any)

- Ben loved her dessert. Made it official that she introduces more ethnic desserts to his colonizer palate.

- Ben saw something unique in (Name): she was so funny, eccentric, talented, free spirited, and crazy but in a good way.

- It wasn't long before they'd coincidentally worked together staring in the Marvel series 'The Punisher'.

- I'd imagine (Name)'s character being the sister to Frank Castle and there is some sort of chemistry between her and Billy Russo.

- (Name) doesn't know this but Ben has actually watched her films and series.

- After meeting her for the first time, he grew curious about her work and explored her films and music, and immediately became enamored by her method of acting and her lyrics.

- Her first time to explore London, Ben is there as well and offers to show her around.

- When he took her to the Harry Potter store (Name) couldn't help but mention how he would've been perfect for a Harry Potter film:

"Ha ha not you too."

"Yes, me too. I've seen your old pictures and you would've been the perfect Sirius Black. Ugh what a wasted opportunity but too late, you're...oooold." She'd exaggeratingly say the last bit in a grim voice.

"I am not old you just happened to be born really late."

"That's what an old person would say."

- His contact name on her phone would be 'Shadow Daddy' (She just had to since his character, General Kirigan, was trending like crazy)

- It was a slow start between the two. Starting off as friends but then things between the two became serious.

-Serious how?

Having dinner together with just each other.

Visiting each other's designated trailers.

Going to London's famous bookstores and exploring great literature.

Ben and (Name) would even do a music sesh or duet some songs together.

She even got to meet his family.

He met her family as well.

- I can imagine (Name) being well versed in technology.

- Young Millennial Zs are just good to adapting to new technologies and constructing their own system units. So it's only natural that she's good at it as well.

- She's also a pro at video games. Like really good that she makes misogynistic, fascist pigs cry like little bitches.

- Like the chick has her own customized mug/tumbler that reads 'FASCIST TEARS'.

- A total badass in Call of Duty (Warzone), Overwatch, Dead by Daylight, Dying Light, Friday the 13th, League of Legends, etc. Don't mess with her.

- Ben one time heard her lay down some serious trash talk and come backs at a bunch of sexist, misogynistic 'men'. (He had spare keys to her place and found her preoccupied in her gaming room)

"Woah! Are you a gamer girl?! Send me some titty pics, bitch"

"You can't handle my melons, bitch. If you're looking for some titty action go back to sucking your mama's. Annoying ass brat."

"This game ain't for girrrllls! Go back to the kitchen and make me a fucking sandwich!"

*Soon after he said that (Name) would constantly headshot his lame ass character barely even touching her or landing a shot at her*

"What the fuck?!Nah Nah, fucking bitch is cheating!"

"Ha ha ha! You fucking suck man. I don't think this game is for you so how 'bout you go to the kitchen and make my fucking sandwich."

- Oh yeah, (Name) is a major savage when ripping into those assholes.

- She was surprised Ben found her like that and felt embarrassed. She was worried he would find it appalling with spoke... Ben was such a composed fella and her... she was basically the devil incarnate ready to erupt and drink the blood of her enemies.

- But her worries went away when Ben chuckled at the scene he had witnessed and asked if she was okay (in a nice way) She'd later explained about how she was being insulted online and it made Ben worried.

- She told him not to worry and that she handled well by kicking their ass.

- Ben's not a gamer (I think) but he was really impressed with how she put down those sexist assholes.

- He found it kind of hot.

"Well that was an...interesting reaction, ha ha ha!"

"Stop laughing! I feel so embarassed that you had to see me that way!"

"I have to admit I found it quite cute how you swore at the screen. Ha ha, you looked like an angry chihuahua. Ha ha ha!"

"Ha Ha very funny"

"Alright, I'm just teasing you. I just hope you won't get into trouble"

"Nonsense. Besides...they only try and get my account reported for 'cheating'. It's not my fault they deliberately suck at playing."

"You are really good... It almost feels unfair."

"You say that because you've never beaten me at Mario Kart to this day."

"I've been practicing whilst I was away filming. So I'd like to think now I'm close to beating you."

"Ooh ho ho. Big talk eh. I'd like to see you try. Prepare to lose...again!"

- The two also enjoyed teasing one another that it gave everyone the impression that they were couple. Heck even their parents thought there was something more between the two.

- Ben laughed it off when his parents told him and he denied saying that he was too old for her. But they thought differently.

- (Name)'s mom was rooting for them (aww bless her) and her dad well...He didn't mind Ben but that was his sweet baby girl. To him, Ben was corrupting his sweet, innocent, little 'angel' baby (Ahahaha he can't see it clearly that his daughter is basically the devil who thrives on Cyberbullying fascist gamers... Yeaahh, an 'angel' for sure but there's nothing wrong with putting down toxic gamers. The girl is basically considered a saint in the gamer girl community)

- Sure there was a bit of a large age gap between the two but his parents had no qualms against whom he dated as long they treated him well. And they believed (Name) was the right fit for him.

- Ben would also invite her to one of his recording sessions and let her listen to him sing and play his piano.

- She would also invite to him to her recording studio to witness her play and come up with new songs.

- She'd be in awe of his talent and it would not go unnoticed by Ben which just bolstered his ego and made him flustered at the same time.

"Enjoy the show?"

"You were amazing! I mean... You all were amazing." She included the rest of the musicians who played by his side.

"Thanks, I'm happy to hear that."

"I heard that you're putting a lot of focus into your music since you didn't have the time to do so?"

"Yeah. I've put it off for a while since I wasn't so sure at the time but..."

"You're doing great and I'm not just saying that as a friend. It may seem late but you've put in a lot of work and creativity into it. I'd say all these years you just had some pent up creativity storming through that head of yours."

"Thanks that means a lot. I appreciate it."

"Happy to help. Ooh now that you're a rising musician does that mean I can be one of your groupies?!"

"Ha ha ha you can be so ridiculous!"

"That's what you love about me."

"You have no idea."

- Ben doesn't understand it yet but he always looked forward to (Name)'s words of encouragement and unwavering support as he trekked through the world of music.

- Despite the age difference the two shared their worlds and experience with one another and it brought them closer and closer.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

[celestialspecial]

Vibrantly Hidden

Synopsis: Lydia has been forced to return home to live with her sisters. The well of magick runs deep in her family, despite her best efforts to avoid that aspect of herself. But strange things are afoot in the town of Crystal Falls and in order to figure out these bizarre happenings she must work alongside her enemy from a rival coven-Billy Russo.

Authors Notes: This story has been my passion project as of late and something that I maybe hope to turn into something real and tangible one day. As a special thanks for all your support I want to share it with you first :) The title is still in the works as I explore other options- input is very welcome on it!

Warnings: 18+, Witchcraft and Magick, Some horror elements, graphic descriptions, smut (use your own discernment)

Chapter One: Click your heels together three times

There were few things I’m certain of in life. 

Never conjure when angry or when the moon is waning.

River spirits never forget a bargain spurned.

The Russo Coven couldn’t be trusted.

It was the near end of august, September rode in on the back of a cool breeze and yellow tinged leaves. 

Sipping a slightly-too salty margarita on a wine bar patio, the glass sweating despite the soft breeze. 

While most people were excited about autumn and all the treats the “-Ber months brought I couldn’t help but feel a pit of sadness at the thought of summer ending.

Ignoring reality had been my personal goal for the season and I’d done it so well. Books by the pool, painting sessions on the beach(with all the retired folks), hikes along trails covered in moss and jagged stones.

Sipping cocktails on patios like this, savoring the complex flavors and picking at charcuterie boards with cheeses whos names I butchered while ordering.

I was living the life. But with each passing day I knew I couldn’t ignore it for much longer. 

After budget cuts, my position at the local art museum was no longer “essential”. Having a background in art history left one wanting for jobs in a bad way.

I should be grateful for the job posting my older sister Elizabeth had sent but when I saw it conveniently was at the local college back home I couldn’t conceal the anxiety taking root in my chest.

I’d applied haphazardly, fully anticipating another, “thank you for your interest- we’ve decided to move ahead with other candidates.” 

But when I saw the “we’d love to have you come on board!” Intro line I knew my fate had been sealed. 

I needed this job.

It wouldn’t be so bad living back at home for a little while until another opportunity came along, right? 

My younger sister Emily was ecstatic. It almost broke my heart a little to imagine telling her I didn’t quite feel the same amount of eagerness.

I’d moved away because I wanted to feel free, to see what my life could be outside of the confines of my hometown. Outside of what I was.

I had needed space. Space in the form of multiple hundreds of miles away. 

Most people grow up playing on swing sets and eating peanut butter sandwiches. Growing up in a family of witches, is something entirely different.

When you’re young and impressionable the idea of having powers, knowing there’s more to life than what most others know. It can feel feel empowering. 

To me it was daunting. Exhausting. It’s not all hocus pocus and fun spellbooks or brewing potions.

I didn’t want to be me. I wanted something else.

Something normal.

The Dawson name was well known and revered in the town of Crystal Falls. We’d been here since the town was christened along with a few other families.

There’d been a Dawson Mayor, Head of the newspaper, a few doctors, even a sheriff. 

If only the upstanding community was aware that the Dawson name was a coven. Not just your run of the mill one, but powerful witches, dating back centuries.

The town today had no idea that witches had laid claim to this land so many years ago.

It’s not something one can post on social media. After the debacle in Salem all the smart actual witches branched off. Some migrated to the Midwest, others searched for the west coast. 

The Dawson’s had gone upwards along the east coast, becoming almost nomadic in nature until settling into a small village, close to the ocean but gently tucked into a blanket of forest.

A river cut through town giving a grand display of multiple waterfalls that ended at the nearby beach. 

If you caught one of the large celestial events of comets or a grandiose full moon the river and falls seemed to glimmer and glow, taking on an ethereal hue.

Hence the name- Crystal Falls. 

Our family had helped imbue protective barriers around the town alongside the Russo coven. Another family of warlocks that had also managed to stumble upon this area.

It was beautiful and charged with an uncontained wild nature that must’ve called to our ancestors in some way. And above all else- it was home.

Me and my sisters had been raised by our aunt and grandmother after our parents died when we were young.

It had been labeled an accident. Driving through the mountainous terrain to reach town was dangerous even during the brightest of days.

But there had been signs, too many for our families liking, to chalk it up to merely an accident. There were too many “magickal” elements at play to ignore.

The brand new car losing control, the large tree having conveniently fallen, after the too conspicuous lightning strike and torrential storm appearing on an otherwise clear meteorological prediction.

I tried not to think of it too long, for fear of losing myself in the grief. Too afraid of falling into the whirlpool of those feelings and drowning, never to be seen again.

“Would you like another?” The waitress asked, taking away my now empty margarita glass.

“Yes please, actually do you have anything remaining from the seasonal menu?”

“Sorry, we just finished the last of the summer sangria but we do have our fall menu out! Fig spritzer with sugared thyme and a pumpkin spice bourbon.”

Another nail in the coffin. Summer was over and I needed to face the reality of my impending trip back home. Whether I liked it or not.

Picking some random Chardonnay off the menu in silent rebellion to their fall drinks I feel a tingle in my left pinkie.

I recognize that feeling. It appears when I’m sad. Or stressed. Or angry. Sometimes when I’m happy. 

I’ll be watching a Netflix show and laughing so hard on my sofa and then I feel the tingling sensation in my fingertips. 

Like dipping my fingers into super icy water then immediately into hot boiling water. I catch it and breathe into the feeling.

Willing it to stop. 

Some tries take longer than others. Over the years I’ve managed to muffle that part of me that yearns to escape.

A rabid dog locked in a basement waiting for the caretaker to get sloppy, lazy. Bursting past the seam of the door and bounding freely into the night.

Not today. One day perhaps. I shudder thinking about it. Or maybe it’s just the breeze, goose bumps break out along my arms and chest.

Eventually after some practiced breathing I feel the tiny reverberations cease. Returning from whence they came.

Boy how I am not looking forward to going home.

The drive back home was a scenic four hour trek through mountains and forestry that could make any camper or hiking enthusiast’s mouth water. 

I’d lost count over the years how many scenic overlooks dotted the area and if there was a drinking game involving shots every time a quaint picturesque New England type village popped up on google maps one would quickly die of alcohol poisoning.

“What do you want for dinner?” Elizabeth’s text pinged on my phone that was propped on the dash hastily.

“So excited!!!!” Emily responded not two seconds later. The age dynamics were far too apparent.

I couldn’t help but grin, I loved my sisters I really do, but it’s been so long since I’d lived with them. 

Elizabeth came into her magic first- understandably so, being the oldest. Grandma was so proud, seeing Lizzy carry on the Dawson legacy.

“Easy Em” 

“Sorry! Sorry! Drive safe!”

I rolled my eyes, chuckling a little as I turned onto another mountain path. This added time to my trip but I just …couldn’t bring myself to take the other route. Not yet.

After another hour or so of driving I finally saw the sign for Crystal Falls, keep right for 30 miles. 

A crusted slab of wood with paint peeling off of it. Emerald green and white swirls of paint beckoning any passerby to stop.

It didn’t pass my notice that a handful of trees had leaves tinged in orange, a few scattered red bursts.

Traitors.

It would be beautiful. The kiss of death to summer and its green tinged warmth. I’d even miss the bugs.

Turning down the Main Street there was a constant stream of activity. People walking in and out of shops, visitors milling around the welcome center, campers clearly here for the upcoming fall foliage unfurling comically large maps of the cave systems.

There was a gazebo at the town center, a la Gilmore girls Stars Hollow that was always decorated according to season. 

I said a silent prayer of thanks seeing the sunflowers still adorning it and not hay bales and pumpkins.

Festive mums sat in fat glazed pots in front of the stores. I rolled my windows down to inhale the smell of home.

Wondering if it’d smell like how I remembered. Fresh flowers, sweet honeysuckle and that tell tale pinch of chill.

Tree branches swayed overhead with the seasonal breeze. Yellowed leaves broke off of a nearby oak and scattered into the street. 

I watched as a gaggle of school girls walked over them, crunching them into the pavement without a thought.

Turning off the main causeway and into the more scenic countryside where a few vineyards with their adjoining wineries sat.

Moon Brew Farm with their delicious peach wine. Cats Tail Vineyard that created a bubbly moscato with hints of fresh blackberry. 

I could feel my mouth water just imagining it, that full mouth feel. Fizzing bubbles popping on my tongue and chasing it with a panini whose sides runneth over in pale cheese.

My stomach gurgled, begging for food. I had only stopped at a Wendy’s on the way since the McDonald’s drive through had a line longer than I cared to sit in.

The remnants of a devoured chicken sandwich rested on my center console. The paper still flecked with grease and a loose pickle that somehow managed to escape my mouth.

I passed a large estate off to the left. A high arched gate cutting the drive off at the main road. The stone pillar at the end read, “Russo.” Engraved into a black marble plaque. 

I drove by, right hand on the wheel, left out the window in an honorary “one finger salute ” at the disgusting excuse for a castle marring our town.

Dirt billowed behind my rickety Subaru as I finally ambled onto a gravel driveway. The popping sound of rocks being shot out from underneath my tires like rapid shrapnel alerted the ladies inside. 

“Lydia!” Emily was the first to run out, screen door slamming shut into Elizabeth’s face as she jumped the porch steps completely.

Lizzy scowled, pushing the screen door out of her way like it owed her money.

“Em, what the hell?” 

I tossed my car in park just in time to see Emily’s grinning face and fists tapping at my window like a madwoman. 

“Can you give me like a second?” I managed a laugh, popping the door open only to be tackled in a rib cage smushing embrace.

“I missed you! So-o-o-o-o much!” Each ‘o’ was accompanied by a sway of our bodies back and forth. 

Elizabeth finally reached us, pushing a stray piece of hair behind her ear. 

“Bet you missed this.” She joked, gesturing to Emily who had wedged her face into my shoulder.

“Shuff-Upf” came Emily’s muffled response as she refused to let go. Maybe she was afraid I’d disintegrate, that I was some clever illusion instead of actually being here in the flesh.

“Missed you-“ I gave a genuine, albeit weary smile to my older sister, somehow untangling a limb to motion her into the bear hug going on.

“So glad to see you.” She relented, easing into the sister shuffle.

It felt nice. I hadn’t stopped so much to reminisce on these things when I was away. I did miss them. I did miss home. I just didn’t miss what home had meant to me for so long.

Eventually Emily peeled herself off of me and dragged me into the house, not pausing even when I nearly tripped on the porch steps.

“Luggage can wait for later!” She had stated. Dinner was ready and honestly I just wanted to unwind and zone out into a pile of amazing food.

Elizabeth and Emily got the cooking gene from our mother. I got my fathers gene of enjoying said cooking.

Chicken pot pie with a flaky crust, yams coated in golden butter, green beans sautéed with almonds and pepper and a peach cobbler with succulent fruit from the local farmers market.

“I still can’t believe you’re home and not just for a vacation but like, for good.” Emily twisted her fork into the leftover cobbler morsels, licking a crumb from her thumb.

“Not for good, just…for now.”

Elizabeth nodded sagely, catching my hesitation and being kind enough to change the subject. 

“How was the drive?”

“Not bad.” I spooned a piece of chicken coated in sauce onto my plate as Elizabeth took another bite of green beans. “I see tons of campers are already here. Don’t they know it’ll be weeks until fall foliage actually appears?”

“The mayor has been trying to push for more summer into fall events to draw in the crowds.” 

“Yeah Elizabeth’s boyfriend has really been overhauling the event planning thing.”

“He is NOT my boyfriend.” Her cheeks turned almost as red as her hair. “It’s about time we had a member of the council actually give a shit about our town and its livelihood.”

Emily dramatically sighed, bringing the back of her hand to her forehead and fluttered her eyelashes. “Yes whatever would we do without dear Sebastyan.”

“The crab?” I smirked, reaching my fork towards another yam. Lizzy pulled the plate away giving me that older sister, raised eyebrow look. It spelled out “watch it” clear enough for me to relent.

“Don’t you start with me.”  

Dinner wraps up with each of us carrying a Handful of dirty dishes into the kitchen. Piled high into the sink with an unspoken agreement to get to them tomorrow.

I watch the two of them joke and share inside info about their planned week ahead. Things I’d know if I lived here. Schedules that would make sense to me but are now new and unknown.

The two of them continue their conversation as I teeter my messy plate on top of an empty glass that once contained a milkshake. It feels weird to hear their voices in person again. The last time I was home was maybe two years ago? For Christmas?

Elizabeth is just as elegant as I remember. Tall, long red hair swept up into a modest pony tail. Barely a smudge of makeup on her but soft pale skin with a dash of freckles across her high cheekbones.

I remember standing on my tippy toes when we were little, getting measured against the doorframe, hoping and praying I’d grow as tall as my older sister.

Fate didn’t pay attention to my pleas. My body threw in the towel the minute I struck 5’3”. Cruel, if I’m being honest. She whisks about the kitchen making a funny face at something Emily said.

It feels like I’m in a fishbowl, hearing noises, knowing someone is speaking but it just sounds muffled and foreign to me. Like I’m not really here.

Emily makes another comment that pulls a laugh from Elizabeth. Emily has always been a lightning bolt. Even when she was a child. Her hair is cut into a blunt bob with thick heavy bangs. It’s dyed a dark brown that almost matches her hot chocolate colored eyes. 

She’s maybe an inch shorter than me, a rarity in our family that the oldest sibling is actually the tallest. My younger sister however has a face full of makeup. It never looks to be too much, always tastefully done and complimenting her features.

They’ve changed so much and not at all from when I last saw them. From the pictures I’d had hanging in my apartment that now sit in a storage facility. 

I feel the bubbling tightness in my chest and I’m yanked from my misty eyed staring. Being around them, their energy, I can feel parts of me clawing to get out. Like taking a spray bottle to a pesky cat, I shove it down.

Emily turned in first, working at a bakery requires her to be up before the sun. She gives me a quick hug once more.

“I really am excited you’re home…for however long.”  Before starting up the stairs, sounds of the shower turning on and soft lilting singing to some show tune carries throughout the halls.

“Wine?” Elizabeth holds a glass up with a bottle of cherry wine, the deep scarlet liquid looks intoxicating. 

“Please.”

We retreat to the porch as the last rays of sunset disappear behind the trees leaving that unsettling light blue that comes before navy then black.

The old rocking chairs groan as we take our seats. The sound the cork popping makes echoes throughout the woods surrounding the house. 

I never forgot how quiet it gets. The crickets had just started their nightly serenade and a few owl hoots call out from a distance. 

She pours me a hefty glass of the wine, handing it to me as we both delicately lean forward in our rickety chairs, balancing bottle and glasses.

Dozens of long shadows climb out from all around us. Reaching towards the front steps and skittering along the warped floorboards.

If I close my eyes it feels like I can even hear them calling out to me. Where have you been? Why have you been gone so long?

Every leaf, branch, blade of grass blending together to create large charcoal swaths against the forest floor. It both chills and excites me. 

“It is nice, ya know? To have you home for more than four days at a time.”

I feel myself shaken from my stupor. Mind slowly drifting back to where it’s supposed to be in the present. On the porch. With my sister. 

For the first time in years.

“You say that now since I’ve only been here for a few hours.” I take a long sip of the wine and let the fruity flavors dance on my tongue. 

“I’m serious.” I hear her rocker stop creaking, her eyes focused on me. Like burning sapphires. I’d always been jealous of her eyes. “I think this…this will be good for all of us.” 

I watch her take a drink before continuing, “We have a lot to catch up on.”

I ponder in silence, running my fingertip along the wine glass’ lip. For a little there’s only the sound of our rockers moving back and forth. 

Occasionally I’ll hear the sounds of Emily getting ready for bed upstairs. A single car drives past on the road, far enough we can’t make it out save for the headlights.

The vibrant ripples of yellow cutting through the trees then fading into the distance. The trees gobble up the remaining light.

“How’s work been?” 

Elizabeth smiles, pouring a little more wine into her cup. I notice as she sips deeply, letting her eyelids drift shut, pondering how to respond.

“It’s been good. I travel a little for work more now than usual but it’s ok. Rewarding.” 

“I couldn’t do it. Be a midwife.” She nodded thoughtfully at my comment, staring off into the ever darkening tree line.

The moon is out, but I watch as it quickly becomes obscured by passing clouds. 

“It can be tough, but I have this gift. It feels selfish to not use it. At least in a way that brings purpose to my life.” 

I found myself nodding and staring off as well. Elizabeth is a healer, ever since she was little she had a knack for it. Never getting colds, being able to concoct awful tasting potions that somehow worked and cured a multitude of things.

Every witch can do basic magic but more often than not, there’s a specialty. A gift that is unique to that person. 

Some people get lucky with theirs. Others not so much.

“You can go on the road with it. Really explore your options.” 

“I do have over a hundred 5 star yelp reviews.” She grinned toasting her glass to the air.

“Elizabeth Dawson-“ I held my hand in front of me, punctuating gestures as if reading a headline, “Midwife To The Stars!” 

We both giggled and took another sip after sloppily ‘cheers-ing’. 

“Ahhhh I don’t know if California or New York is for me.” She chuckled, twisting a strand of her dark red hair held by her ponytail. 

I settle back into my seat, rocking back and forth, pushing with my heels and feeling the entirety of my foot flatten then pitch back.

“Soooo Sebastyan?” 

“Don’t start with me already.” Liz smirked at me, dipping her fingers in the wine glass and flicking a few drops in my direction.

Maybe this was ok. Maybe this would be ok.

How silly and naïve I was.

After half an hour of sitting on the porch and enjoying the entire bottle of wine, the sky had fully morphed from navy to inky black. The local owl continued to hoot, a rhythmic sound that I could feel myself drifting off too.

Elizabeth had already placed her glass on the counter by the sink, turning in for the night. Flipping the porch light off and only on occasion would the motion sensor light by the back door turn on.

Squirrels, chipmunks, raccoons maybe even a coyote or two always liked to wander up by the back door and sniff around our trash bins. I sat up reading in the living room a while longer, not quite ready to face my old room.

Instead choosing to inspect the first floor, wondering what new things I could pick out from the décor. A small painting of Emily’s rabbit, Artimus that was clearly done on a wine and paint night.

Large bookshelves lined the backwall surrounding the TV, so many books from Elizabeth’s studies, health magazines spread along the coffee table.

A wreath with some greenery bearing white berries and red bow, a few old coffee tins and tea containers holding either flowers or some assortment of pens and paintbrushes.

So much was the same and yet I still felt like an outsider.

Surrendering to the reality I did need to go to bed I gathered my phone, book and flicked off the last of the remaining lamps to ascend the stairs.

Our gallery wall floated along the steps. Photos of almost every generation of our family lay plastered against the drywall that desperately needed repainted.

Our parents wedding day, their smiling faces. Moms bright blue eyes and Dads goofy grin in his tuxedo which was so chic in the eighties. Then came photos of Grandma and Aunt Cora.

I quickly shuffled past them. I had weeks, no, months, to look at these and let the waves of guilt wash over me. Not tonight. Not before bed anyways.

Padding across the plush carpet to my bedroom, the door ajar and bedside lamp on. No doubt from Elizabeth. It didn’t escape my notice the bundle of lavender and dill laid on my pillowcase.

For protection. I hold the small bundle in my lap a moment, searching my mind for the exact spells its used for. My grandmother would have a fit if she knew it was taking me this long.

What can I say? I’ve been living life as a normal human for the past ten years to the best of my ability. Ignoring anything magickal or otherwise. I’d even avoided palm readers at the local county fairs I’d gone to.

I wanted little to nothing to do with magick. Regardless of how deep it ran in our family. I lay the bundle down on the end table right next to my phone.

Please protect me from bad dating app messages.

A stack of clean towels and beauty products rested on the toilet seat in the bathroom. I pulled my hair back into a low bun, splashing water onto my face and rubbing some milky cleanser that I knew had to be Emily’s onto my skin.

It smelled fragrant, like lemons and a sweet sugary after scent. Glancing up to survey the damage from the long day on my face, expecting to see dark circles, dull dry skin, but instead I looked fine. I looked normal.

Turning the cleanser over in my hands wondering if it had some “extra” properties in it that I wasn’t aware of but my younger glamorous sister did. I couldn’t see anything outside the ordinary.

I didn’t sense anything off.

Shrugging and placing it back on the counter, before returning back to my bedroom. Allowing myself to fall heavily against the mattress, a comical ‘huff’ escaping my lips. This was it. I was here.

For however long I needed to be. My fingertips ran up along the hem of the quit on my bed. Feeling the bumps of stitches along the pads of my fingers, the different textured fabrics. My eyes felt heavy.

Sleep called to me, sweet and deep. The edges of my vision blurred and darkened. With the last of my remaining alertness I turned the lamp off. I felt that deep heaviness fall over me.

In the far-off distance I could hear the owl once more. Then it was truly silent.

The back-sensor light came on. I whined as my room was immediately filled with a bright fluorescent light.

“What the hell...” I rubbed at my eyes, still not adjusted to such a bright searing light all of a sudden. Then I heard something knock against the garage. It didn’t sound like a skunk, or a raccoon.

Unless it was a huge raccoon.

Doubtful.

Pushing off of the bed I crouched down, making my way to the window. The curtains were sheer and the blinds were up. Peering around the side I craned my neck to see what was out there.

It was quiet. So startlingly quiet. No fauna chirping or calling out into an otherwise peaceful night.

The light was still on, but there was nothing in the yard. No animals, no creeps. Nothing.

I felt the hair on the back of my neck perk up. A green spark tickled the end of my fingertips and I didn’t even attempt to shove it away. My body knew there was something out there.

We’re so used to being the predator, never the prey. My eyes continued to scan back and forth, wondering if I needed to let one of my sisters know something was up.

Maybe this was normal? Did the light just randomly turn on from time to time? Ya know- technology? So efficient.

If that was the case why did I feel so…off? Something, isn’t right. Then I see it.

A flicker so fast that I’m half certain my mind made it up. Back in the tree line by the back of the garage, a different kind of darkness.

Not the shadows I had seen earlier from the trees on the porch. This is more opaque. It seems to undulate as it moves along the back of the yard. It doesn’t glide but rather jerks.

I feel my heart begin to race.

Its pace is slow, unseemly. Shadow against shadow and yet I can see it clear as day. Blackness that swallows the night whole. It’s form shivers and writhes against a large oak.

I must be dreaming. Yes. I’d fallen asleep and now I am dreaming something up that isn’t there. What a funny story I’ll have to tell my sisters in the morning.

But to be sure…

I grab my phone, sliding my finger across the screen to bring up the camera, pointing it out the back window. Somehow in the few moments it took me to grab my phone its gone.

The shadow isn’t where I last saw it. I am dreaming. I set my phone back down and then I see it.  Or rather, it sees me.

It sees me, seeing it. And my body goes rigid.

Black malformed nothingness creeping along the garage and staring at me. Its featureless, save for cold pinpricks of red where eyes should be.

Red and beady, almost like light reflecting against an animals eyes.

It glows, but maybe anything would look glow-y against such a stark backdrop. The blood in my body runs like ice. The goose bumps have moved to my arms as well.

I don’t know how long we stare at each other. Maybe three seconds, maybe five minutes. I blink for the first time in I don’t know how long and when I stare back its gone.

Really gone this time.

I must have scanned the backyard and the fence and the woods and the garage multiple times for over ten minutes. I see nothing. My head feels fuzzy. Like I’d taken a large sleeping pill and have been fighting the effects for too long.

I hoist myself back into bed, because I am too afraid to go out there and check. Too tired to wake my sisters. It feels like my limbs have been replaced with sacks of flour.

Heavy, soft, the weight bringing me down. Pushing me against the mattress. I’m exhausted and alert and my body doesn’t know which to indulge more.

Eventually sleep wins and I drift off into a fitful night filled with dreams of sharp shadows following me. And one with red eyes leading the chase.

[love-strawberry]

as the poets say

summary : in which they get married and it's the best day ever.

pairing : ben barnes x reader

warnings : language

author's note : had soooooo much fun writing this!! i am back from the dead and will try to finish my requests by the end of week!! send in more please, keeps me motivated!! <3

tagged : @mrsben-barnes @ellora-brekker @slut4benbarnes

masterlist

navigation

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liked by tchalamet, freddycarter1, benbarnes and 3,528,752 others

y/n_ so thankful for my family, my friends and most of all, my husband. i love you, ben, so much. more than word will ever describe. you spilling red wine on my white satin dress may have been a bad decision back then but in the long term, i'm glad it lead me to you. i love you and i thank the stars everyday for you. can't wait to spend forever and ever and after that with you darling <3

tagged benbarnes

89,629 comments

username IM CRYING

username WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS

username ME AND WHO? ME AND WHO?!

username we went to having ben and y/n flirt awkwardly with eachother to them saying i do at their wedding, i love

freddycarter1 great, now he's crying

username ben and y/n>>>>

username LADIES AND GENTLEMAN AND NON BINARY PALS THEM>>

andrewgarfield LOOK AT YOUUUU ALL GROWN UP

username okay but that venue

benbarnes first off, that's a BIG caption, you know i can't compete with that and second, i love you. thank you for being in my life and making it a 100x better <3

-> y/n_ i love you <3 you don't need to write anything to prove it

username i want a greenhouse wedding so bad

jessie_mei_li MY LOVES SO HAPPY FOR YOU

tchalamet AHHHHGDJSNSGSKSKANKSSL

username timothee, same

username SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP SLIDING DOWN THE WALL

username remember when ben was like we're just friends and y/n was like totally, yeah you fucking liars

-> username i feel like all their friends ghost wrote this comment

danielle_galligan 🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍

username 🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋

jacktwolfe i caught the bouquet 😼

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liked by y/n_, calahan.skogman, archierenaux3 and 3,924,428 others

benbarnes standing at the alter and seeing you walking down the aisle has been a dream come true. i love you, more than i can say or write. you're half of my soul, as the poets say. and i swear i'm gonna make you the happiest <3 you complete me

tagged y/n_

84,529

username HE QUOTED HER FAVOURITE BOOK

username ANKSKAZMSKSZLALSMA

kittheyounger my parents 🤧

username SOBBING IN MY PRECALC CLASS

archierenaux3 so so so happy for you both <3

lbardugo my babies!!! so proud of you both

username im so happy for them!! they went from being strangers to starring in messrs and miss and then to being bestfriends and now husband and wife!! i can't believe we saw the most amazing love story unfold in front of our eyes

y/n_ i love that polaroid

-> benbarnes and i love you

username HER DRESS>>>>

username <Y/NANDBEN3

freddycarter1 🤍🤍🤍

amitasuman_ you both looked so beautiful!! <3 love you sooooo much

username okay but imagine their vows?? did y/n cry?? did ben cry?? he probably did. did anyone else cry?? their friends?? i feel like timothee, andrew and aaron definitely cried

jacktwolfe happy happy happy couple

username 🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋

username imagine being married to THE ben barnes

-> username imagine being married to THE y/n y/l/n

username i want this so bad :(

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liked by tchalamet, kittheyounger, freddycarter1 and 3,925,429 others

y/n_ still can't believe that this beautiful man is my HUSBAND!! also italy>>>

tagged benbarnes

91,528 comments

username okay stop flexing bestie

username ohh, to be y/n

username drop. more. wedding. photos.

username wowowowowowowowowow

benbarnes are you kidding me? i can't believe that you're MY wife

-> y/n_ stfu, this is about you not me <3

username my aesthetic is ben and y/n simping for eachother

username wow i want someone to love me as much as i love ben and y/n

kittheyounger we got it,,, you're married,,, stop flexing on the singles

username kit spoke for all of us

username that place is exactly from luca

username 🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋

danielle_galligan divorce him and marry me pls

username aksjslzkxks they're both so in love it's sickening

username wow, go and make us feel more single why don't you huh?

jessie_mei_li love love love love loveeee you

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liked by y/n_, andrewgarfield, aarontjohnson and 3,952,242 others

benbarnes i love you.

tagged y/n_

89,327 comments

username i wanna be there, that place looks like heaven

username those paintings tho

username SOMEONE LOVE ME RN IM NOT KIDDING AHHHHHH

tchalamet yeah ofc, fuck off to italy without your friends why don't you

freddycarter1 not cool, you know we wanted to go too

username LMFOABDJSK THEIR FRIENDS WANTED TO GO ON THEIR HONEYMOON

y/n_ you have my heart <3

-> benbarnes and you have mine <3

username awwwww *lays on the highway"

username sobbing currently

username imagine having someone to love AND being loved by someone

amitasuman_ that looks like an amazing place!! really hope you're both enjoying!!

kittheyounger yeah not jealous of you, totally not haha

username they're in disney, that's looks exactly from luca

calahan.skogman mate you should come back in a week. otherwise the others are gonna come to you, they're looking at tickets and hotels rn

jacktwolfe wow, i wanna be there

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[pinchofhoney]

HIII

First off: YAAAYYY we hit the same milestones together omg!

You're practically my tumblr soulmate now!!

Secondly, my request:

Ben Barnes with angst prompt 1 and fluff prompt 9.

Maybe like best friends in love but they see each other fall in love with other people before they accept their feelings and get together??

a tale of chance and destiny # 200 follower special event

» prompt event » special events masterlist

angst prompt one: “i guess i wasn’t enough, was i?”

fluff prompt nine: “how much longer are you going to hide your feelings for me, dummy?”

gif is not mine, credit to the owner

ben barnes x fem!reader

word count: 1.4k

warning: a little angst with a fluff touch, friends to lovers

summary: Life can be a whirlwind of surprises, especially when it comes to matters of the heart.

a/n: oh, who do we have here?? my sweetest tumblr dot com user<33 hello!! let's shine together and continue to be delusional by writing things that will never happen lmao

pages that may interest you: masterlist ♡ taglist ♡ who i write for

taglist: @myladydarkling @alexxavicry

The torment of unrequited love had been with you for as long as you could remember. Your heart ached every time you looked at Ben, your best friend, and realized that he would probably never feel the same way about you again. Yet, you couldn't help but hold onto hope that maybe, just maybe, he would see you in a different light.

As you both grew up together, spending countless hours playing in the park, building forts in the woods, and dreaming about your future, your bond grew stronger. You shared everything with each other, including your passion for acting. You made a promise to pursue it together, and you did just that.

But fate had a cruel way of teasing you. Your friendship took an unexpected turn when you were cast as love interests in a movie. You both tried to resist the chemistry between you, but it was too strong to ignore. You dove headfirst into a romantic relationship, believing that it was meant to be. However, the harsh reality of the entertainment industry set in, and the demands of your busy schedules made it almost impossible to find time for each other. The once-strong bond began to fray, and you both realized that you were better off as friends.

The aftermath was a painful and bittersweet journey. Years went by, and both you and Ben tried to move on with your lives, dating other people and pursuing your careers. But the feelings you had for each other never completely vanished. You could still feel the intense longing, the deep yearning for something you couldn't have. The memories of what could have been haunted you, and you found yourself daydreaming about Ben, wondering if things could have been different.

One particularly rough day on set, you returned home exhausted and defeated. You collapsed onto your bed and let out a deep sigh. Your mind was filled with images of Ben with his new girlfriend, laughing and smiling together on social media. You couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy and sadness.

You dragged yourself to the bathroom and stood in front of the mirror. You stared at your reflection, feeling completely drained. “I guess I wasn't enough, was I?” you said to yourself, your voice barely above a whisper.

The tears fell freely down your face, and you tried to wipe them away with shaking hands. But they kept coming, a never-ending reminder of the pain you felt deep inside. You didn't know how to move on, how to forget about Ben and the feelings you had for him for all these years.

You tried to push away the feeling of sadness and jealousy that crept up inside you. You knew you shouldn't feel this way, that Ben was free to be with whoever he wanted. But the thought of him with someone else just made your heart ache.

You leaned against the bathroom sink and closed your eyes, trying to calm your racing thoughts. Suddenly, your phone buzzed on the counter, interrupting your thoughts. It was a text from Ben.

“Hey, are you okay? You seemed pretty down today,” the message read.

Your heart skipped a beat as you read his words. You hesitated for a moment before typing out a response.

“Not really. Just feeling a bit overwhelmed,” you replied.

A few seconds later, your phone buzzed again.

The pain was becoming unbearable. The thought of Ben with another woman was a constant thorn in your side, a reminder of everything you couldn't have. And now, with him asking if you wanted to talk, the temptation to spill your heart out was almost too much to bear.

You wanted nothing more than to tell him everything. To let him know how much you loved him and how much it hurt to see him with someone else. But you knew that it would only make things worse. So, you swallowed your pain and replied with a simple “No, I'm fine.”

The silence that followed was deafening. You sighed deeply and cast a quick glance at your reflection. Your smudged makeup made you look even more pathetic, as if crying for a man you couldn't have wasn't enough.

The realization hit you hard – you were in love with someone who would never love you back. You tried to push the thought away, but it clung to you like a disease. Every moment you spent with Ben was filled with the unspoken tension of unrequited love.

You had to pull yourself together, especially since tomorrow you were going to have to visit the set where you were supposed to meet Ben. You took a quick shower, where you thoroughly cleaned your face of any leftover makeup and changed into comfortable pajamas, then went straight to bed, trying not to think about your friend and the girl who made him smile widely.

But sleep was elusive, and your mind raced with thoughts of Ben. You couldn't escape the pain, no matter how hard you tried. You tossed and turned, wishing for the sweet release of unconsciousness, but it never came.

The morning came too soon, and you dragged yourself out of bed, feeling more exhausted than ever. As you got dressed, the thought of seeing Ben again filled you with both dread and excitement. You knew that you had to be strong, to put on a brave face and act like everything was okay.

But as soon as you saw him, all your resolve crumbled. The way he smiled at you, the sound of his voice, the way he moved – it all reminded you of what you couldn't have.

Despite trying to keep your feelings under control, you found it increasingly difficult to hide your emotions for Ben. Every time you saw him with someone else, your heart ached. You tried to convince yourself that his happiness was all that mattered, but deep down, you knew you were lying to yourself.

Days turned into weeks and weeks into months, and you both continued living your lives as best as you could. But little did you know, Ben was also struggling with his feelings for you. You had always assumed he was happy in his relationships, but that wasn't the case.

One day, after a long day of work, Ben asked you to come over to his apartment for a drink. You happily accepted, excited to spend some time with him. As you walked in, you couldn't help but feel nostalgic. Nothing had changed since your last visit a few months ago.

After catching up on each other's lives, you and Ben had a few drinks and began to feel more relaxed in each other's company. As the night wore on, Ben turned to you and with a twinkle in his eye, asked, “How much longer are you going to hide your feelings for me, dummy?” You felt your heart skip a beat, unsure of how to respond. You had always been afraid of confessing your feelings to Ben, afraid that it might ruin your friendship, especially since it didn't work out for you once. But Ben had something else to say, “We broke up with Lena a few days ago, and I couldn't keep it up any longer. To hide what I really feel and I know you feel the same.”

You couldn't believe it. The man you had secretly loved for so long had just confessed that he felt the same way about you. Without hesitation, you leaned in and kissed him. It was a sweet, gentle kiss that felt like all the stars in the sky had aligned just for you. It felt like everything finally made sense, and all your fears were put to rest.

You spent the rest of the night talking about your future together, dreaming up all the amazing things you could do and be as a couple. You snuggled up together on the couch, feeling content and happy.

As you left Ben's apartment that night, you couldn't help but feel grateful for all the years of friendship that had brought you to this moment. You had been through so much together, and now you were finally able to take the next step in your journey together.

You knew that the road ahead wouldn't be without its challenges. You had made mistakes in the past, and you were determined not to repeat them. But as you looked up at the starry sky, you knew that destiny had brought you and Ben together for a reason. You placed your trust in the universe and felt a sense of peace knowing that everything would work out as it should.

[softtdaisy]

Love everythig that has to do with Billy Russo. So you do how he would act when his girl is mad at him?

I do too 👀

I honestly think Billy would be pissed at first like how dare you be mad at mister Billy Russo himself?

You know he’s the type to answer back if you say something mean to you.

But after a few hours or days of silence treatment, Billy would understand that you’re not going to let him come back until he apologies and proves he will changes

If you’re living together, I get perfectly picture Billy coming to you when you’re sitting on the sofa and starting to kiss you on the neck. “Billy..:” you would whispered, a sound between a threat and a moan

You would feel him smile on your skin while he kept kissing you, going down on you slowly. Making you feel good is a good way for him to apologise since it’s not really his thing to say “I’m sorry”

And you could never refuse a good night of sex with Billy. That man owns your body.

But sometimes Billy would surprise you. Like the time he made dîner to you to apologises after he killer someone -again- and he came back home with blood on his hand -again-

You had left the house for two days and you learned later that he cooked everyday hoping you would come back.

There is one thing you know: as long as Billy wants you, he will do everything to make you want him back. He will never accept a rejection. Meaning no matter his mistakes or how mad you get, Billy will always win you back.

[cavillanche]

Compassion

Aleksander is drawn to an injured healer. Rated T ~3,000 words

___________________________________

General Kirigan strode through the camp toward the medical tents. When word reached him of the attack against a group of healers traveling to the front, he was in his carriage in less than two minutes.

"How bad is it?"

"It's bad, sir." The camp healer wiped his brow. "There were six of them traveling when they were hit. One died there with one of the guards. Another died in transit. The others barely survived."

"The surviving guard?"

"Through here."

Kirigan stood over the heartrender guard while the healer woke him from sleep.

"General, sir."

"Don't try to sit up." Kirigan sighed. "Can you tell me what happened?"

The man recounted the ambush. "We would all be dead if it weren't for her."

"Her?"

"One of the healers, sir. Nadia, I believe. She was one of the first injured, and took multiple hits, but she managed to keep healing the rest of us. I don't know how she found the strength."

"Rest." Krigian put a hand on the man's shoulder, then turned to the camp healer. "Take me to this healer he spoke of."

Deeper into the tent, the woman lay unconscious. Gashes crossed her cheeks and forehead. Blood soaked her braided chestnut hair.

"Her kefta stopped damage to the major organs, but she had several injuries to her face and head, and her leg was broken. The bone broke the skin. There are only two healers here at the camp, myself being one. We've had to split our attention to keep them all alive and comfortable. So, none are fully healed yet."

Healing when hurt wasn't easy, but to heal so many others in her condition, Kirigan knew this woman was special.

"Can she be moved?"

"We have nowhere to move her, sir."

"To the Little Palace. Can she be moved?"

The healer fumbled over his thoughts. "It would be risky, but possible."

"Risky how?"

"A jarring ride could open a healing wound."

Kirigan looked around the tent at the couple of people sitting up in their cots. "What about the other healers? Are any of them able to travel? To help keep her comfortable?"

"Yes," he nodded. "One could."

"Good. Prepare this woman to ride back with me in my carriage. Whatever needs to be done."

"Yes, General."

The camp healer walked away to carry out the order, but Krigian stayed for a moment. He put a firm hand to her head.

"What makes you such a fighter?"

He slipped out before anyone saw.

The ride back to the Little Palace was longer than usual. Kirigan ordered the driver to go slow and take the easiest path, but the woman still groaned in her sleep as the carriage rocked.

"What's your name?" Kirigan asked the accompanying healer.

"Liliya, sir."

"And her name?" He nodded to the floor where she lay on the stretcher.

"Nadia Kozlova, sir."

"Is it true? Did she save your life?"

"I don't remember much, sir. It happened so fast. But I do remember when I hit the ground. The attackers seemed to know that the kefta would protect us. They went for our heads and legs. My leg was broken like hers. I looked over, barely able to focus on breathing let alone healing, and she was healing my leg from where she fell. Then she moved to the next person."

"If you are well enough, Liliya, I'd like you to care for her once we are at the Little Palace."

"I'd be honored to help her, General. I owe her a debt."

—

Nadia woke up in a strange room. Lush and pleasant, but unfamiliar. That was the part that frightened her. Her eyes darted around the room looking for the door when she spotted a familiar face sleeping in the chair next to her bed.

"Liliya? Liliya!"

Liliya jolted awake and got to her feet.

"Nadia, you're awake. Oh, Saints. You had me so worried."

"Where are we?"

"We're home." Liliya smiled.

"Little Palace? But this isn't my room."

"No, General Kirigan put you in one of the suites."

"The General? Why?"

"Because of what you did. Nadia, you very well may have kept us all alive."

"She very well did." General Kirigan appeared in the doorway. Liliya stood, and Nadia tried to sit up. "Please, stay resting. Liliya has done a good job healing you, but you deserve a rest."

"I was only doing my job, sir."

"Until your last breath. Or it would have been had the extra guards not arrived when they did." He nodded at Liliya. "Leave us."

After Liliya was gone, Kirigan took her seat.

"The other healers just lay there. Dying. You healed them all as you lay broken. Where did you find the strength when others couldn't?"

"Simply a will to live, sir."

"Yet no one was healing you."

"I just… I couldn't let them lie there in pain. Not if I could help."

"Compassion for our people. Not something often seen, even among our own." The General stood. Nadia tried to sit up, but he put a hand on her shoulder and gently pushed her back down. "When you are well again, I would like you to stay on as my healer. Your power is unlike the others. Stronger. I may need that at my side one day."

"General Kirigan…" He put out his hand to stop her as she sat up. "Please," she said, "let me rise to accept. I am well enough."

A smile tugged at the dark General's lips. "Very well."

Nadia got to her feet and stood as straight as she could. The realization that she was in a night dress almost made her flinch, but she faced her General.

"I accept, sir. It would be an honor.

"Good. Now, back to bed."

The grin on his face made her laugh. "Yes, sir."

He held her covers while she climbed back in, then pulled them over her.

"I will return your healer to you. When she says you are ready, your service will begin."

"Yes, General."

—-

Nadia followed two paces behind General Kirigan, to the left of his heartrender, Ivan. Kirigan had barely spoken to her since she took the position as his healer, yet she was with him most hours of the day.

This day led to a meeting with the leaders at the front. More planning. More strategizing. Nadia sat in the corner of the room, bored almost to tears. The only thing that kept her from falling asleep was watching him. Kirigan fascinated her. He was intelligent. He was powerful, and feared by many, but he had a calmness to him. Some found it more terrifying than if he had an ill temper, but not Nadia. Something in his calmness spoke of a life of experiences she couldn't imagine.

She'd seen him angry once, and that most definitely scared her, because the calmness remained, barely cracked, as he seethed out an order through gritted teeth. The shadows that followed him surged before he took a deep breath and pushed them back.

She saw that anger bubbling now as the meeting came to a close. She'd paid no attention to the discussion, so she had no idea what made him angry, but she could see it beneath the surface.

He held up a hand as Nadia and Ivan followed him from the room.

"Leave me."

They stopped as he continued down the hall.

"Do we wait here?" Nadia asked Ivan.

"No. He'll call for us if he needs us."

"He looks upset. Should we make sure he's all right?"

Ivan scoffed. "Sure. If you have a death wish."

He walked away, but Nadia followed the General as he turned the corner at the end of the corridor. He was headed toward his chambers.

She almost froze as the slamming door echoed down the hall. Maybe she did have a death wish. She hesitated before knocking.

"Go away!"

"Sir," she raised her voice to be heard through door, "I'm sorry, sir, I just—"

The door flew open. "What do you want?"

"You seemed upset. I wanted to check on you. Is there anything I can do?"

Kirigan narrowed his eyes, and Nadia braced herself for a berating. Instead, his eyes softened and his shoulders fell.

"Come in." He closed the door and removed his kefta. "What can a healer do to soothe anger and frustration?"

He stood at his desk, shifting papers around.

"I can't help as a healer, but as a person… I'm a good listener."

"You were in the room for the meeting. If you're such a good listener then you should already know what's bothering me."

"I must admit, I tend to lose focus in those meetings. I'm not military minded. I get a bit…"

"Bored?"

He grinned and Nadia relaxed a bit.

"Yes, sir."

"So, your compassion goes beyond healing the fatally injured."

"I hope so, sir. Otherwise, what good is it?"

He stopped and stared at her so long that she had to look away. She fidgeted, thumbing the ring on her index finger.

"You shouldn't play with your amplifier."

"How did you know?"

"I noticed it while you were still recovering. Your power is much stronger than other healers. An amplifier would make sense. And still…" he walked around his desk and stood in front of her, "even without the amplifier, your powers have always stood out, haven't they?"

"Yes, sir."

"I sensed it from the moment I saw you. So much power, yet you still care so much for others. You are truly special, Nadia."

Her face flushed, and she looked down.

"Perhaps sharing my concerns with you would help ease my anger."

Kirigan paced while he recounted the meeting. Despite her lack of military interest, Nadia listened intently. Her focus never wavered, even as the shadows grew. Nadia stood quietly until the room was almost devoid of light. Then she risked touching his hand.

"Sir…"

"What?"

"Your darkness is consuming us."

"Surrounding, not consuming." But even as he spoke, the shadows withdrew. "Were you afraid?"

"No, sir. But I've noticed that your shadows expand when you're upset. Only, these weren't receding."

"Not afraid. Worried about how I felt."

"Yes, sir."

Krigian brushed a finger over Nadia's cheek.

"You are special," he whispered.

"Does no one else show concern for you, sir?"

"Only when they believe my troubles will affect the outcome of a battle."

"I'm sorry, sir."

"Call me Aleksander."

"What?"

"When we're alone, call me Aleksander."

"Sir, I don't think—"

"Please." He splayed his hand across her cheek, his thumb brushing the corner of her mouth.

Words failed her, so she nodded.

"Thank you for your compassion, Miss Kozlova."

"Nadia."

Aleksander smiled. "Nadia."

She stilled as he leaned toward her. His hand slipped from her cheek, down her neck, and pulled her closer until a knock on the door made her jump back.

"What?" Aleksander yelled.

"I have an urgent update, sir." Ivan replied through the door.

Aleksander sighed and kissed Nadia's hand. "Thank you for checking on me."

"Of course."

—

Nadia followed behind Aleksander and Ivan. More bad news from the front had the General changing tactics. Ivan listened to the orders as they entered Aleksander's chambers.

"Dismissed."

Ivan nodded and Nadia turned to follow him out.

"Not you, Miss Kozlova. You stay."

Ivan sent a raised eyebrow her way, but left and shut the door.

"Is there something you need, sir?"

"Yes." He pulled the collar of his shirt aside to reveal a large burn where his neck met his shoulder. "I got a bit too close to a new inferni while he was practicing."

"You weren't wearing your kefta."

"No."

He hissed as he pulled his shirt over his head. The burn went down his arm, to his elbow.

"Were there no other healers around?"

"I wanted you."

She looked up into his eyes. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"No time. This is the first private moment I've had all day."

Nadia crossed her hands, then moved them down the burn, hovering over Aleksander's skin. He sighed with relief, then took her hand.

"Thank you."

"It's my job."

Aleksander slid his hand behind her neck and pulled her forward. He paused, his lips hovering over hers.

"This is not part of your job. May I?"

"Yes."

He smiled and softly pressed his lips to hers. Nadia brushed her fingers over his jaw, then slipped her hand into his hair, deepening the kiss. Aleksander wrapped his arms around her waist as she slid her hands down his bare chest.

He broke their kiss for just a moment and rested his forehead against hers, then he scooped her up into his arms and carried her to his bedchamber. It wasn't until he lay her down that she realized the extent of his intentions.

"Aleksander, wait."

He froze, but didn't pull away.

"What's wrong?"

"This is just… it's too fast." She panted the words. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize." He took her hand and pulled her to her feet. "I'm a patient man."

His wide smile made her blush, and she bit her lip. Aleksander tugged at it with his thumb, pulling it from between her teeth, and kissed her again.

"I should go," she said.

"Please stay. I did need your healing powers, but I also want your company. I promise to behave myself."

He led her back into the other room and pulled his shirt back on.

"And what will we do?"

"Talk. Kiss?"

Nadia laughed. "Both appealing choices."

Aleksander leaned against his desk and smiled. He was more relaxed than she'd ever seen him as he reached out his hand. She hesitated, but took it, and he pulled her into his arms.

"Did Ivan know about your burns?"

"Yes."

"And did he try to murder the poor bastard who did it?"

Aleksander laughed. "He probably thought about it."

Nadia rubbed down his arm where his burns were.

"Why didn't you call for me right away?"

"I can't be seen as weak."

"Those were serious burns."

"I've had worse injuries. I knew you would heal me eventually. I could endure the pain for a while."

"You endure so much already. Let me help where I can."

His eyes widened for just a moment. "What do you think I endure?"

"Think? No. It's obvious that you endure the responsibilities of leading an army. You endure the burdens of the Grisha, our suffering and survival. No one can endure all things alone, Aleksander. Not even a man as powerful as you."

He caressed her face with both hands.

"You see me so well, do you?"

"Tell me I'm wrong and I'll never mention it again."

"I do bear the burdens of our people… in many ways. Everything I do, including leading the army, is for them."

"I know." She smiled. "I see your compassion. And yet, you think mine is special."

Aleksander kissed her so hard that she whimpered. His hands slipped back to her waist, and pulled her closer.

Nadia turned away to breathe, but he continued down her neck.

"I'll have to check your definition of 'behaving.'"

Aleksander laughed. "I'm sorry. I can't seem to help myself when I'm alone with you."

"Then, perhaps I really should go."

"I have some free time tomorrow. Will you go riding with me?"

"Just us?"

"Just us."

"That sounds lovely."

—

Nadia stood at his door. Their first night back at Little Palace. She'd tossed and turned all night, trying to sleep after the horror she witnessed on the battlefield that week. Sleep only brought nightmares.

She knew if she knocked on his door she might no longer be able to resist him. The past few months had been spent stealing kisses and talking long into the night. Was she ready to admit her feelings? Did he truly see her as more than a conquest?

With a deep breath, she knocked. She waited for him to call out, but there was no response. She was ready to knock again when he opened the door.

"Nadia… is everything all right?"

"I couldn't sleep. I thought you might be awake."

"Come in."

The room was shrouded in shadow, and Nadia pulled her robe tighter around her.

"Aleksander, you're upset."

He glanced around the room, but the shadows remained.

"We lost so many people this week."

"I know." She took his hand and caressed his face.

"It's been a while since I've had a good night's sleep. It makes it harder to fend off the darkness sometimes."

"Then try to sleep. I'll leave you to rest."

"Stay."

"Aleksander, I can't—"

"No. I only want your presence. Just lie with me." He pressed her hand against his face. "Please."

The darkness seemed to surge around them.

"I'll stay."

He pressed a soft kiss to her lips then led her to his bed. Robes removed, they slipped beneath the covers, and Aleksander pulled Nadia into his arms.

"If we blow out the bedside candle we won't be able to see each other in this darkness," she said.

Aleksander pressed his lips to her forehead and closed his eyes. The shadows retreated, and the moonlight seemed even brighter than usual. He blew out the candle.

"I always want you to see me, Nadia. You're the only one who does."

She caught a glimpse of tears in his eyes.

"Surely someone has seen the real you before."

"Once. Many years ago. She was a healer, too."

"What happened?"

"She was murdered in front of me."

"I'm so sorry."

"I loved her."

Nadia rested a hand on his chest. "And have you loved since?"

He stared at her so long that she thought she'd offended him.

"Not until now," he whispered.

"Aleksander… I…"

Nadia brushed her fingers over his jaw. She never thought this man could ever love her.

"Make love to me, Aleksander."

He closed his eyes and swallowed hard. He took the hand at his chest and laced their fingers together.

"Not tonight," he whispered. "I don't want our first time to be out of a shared misery."

Nadia smiled. "I can wait."

"You won't have to wait long." He grinned. "Tonight, I just want you in my arms."

"That's where I'll be."

[sergeantbuckybarnes]

the little things // ben barnes

Summary: It's the small, consistent demonstrations of love and affection that build the foundation for a successful and long-lasting relationship.

Pairing: Ben Barnes x Reader

Word count: 1.2k

Warnings: lots of fluff

A/N: As always, remember English is not my first language. This isn’t proofread, so I apologize for any grammatical errors this may have.

main masterlist

As the sun’s rays kissed the room, you slowly opened your eyes and found yourself wrapped in Ben’s arms. He looked so peaceful as he slept, his breathing steady and calm.

You couldn't resist leaning in and placing a gentle kiss on his cheek, ushering in the start of a new day. A soft groan escaped his lips as he stirred from his slumber, his eyes gradually fluttering open.

“Good morning,” you whispered, a smile forming on your lips.

“Good morning to you too,” he replied, his voice still groggy with sleep.

“How did you sleep?” you asked, tracing circles on his chest with your finger.

“Really well. Especially since I had such a beautiful woman next to me.”

A quick warmth spread across your cheeks as soon as the compliment left his lips. “Stop it,” you said, trying to hide your smile. 

Even after two years of dating, you’d still flush every time he showered you with compliments. Which happened a lot, since Ben loved complimenting you. He never held back when it came to expressing how much he loved you, and how beautiful and talented you were. Among many other things. You also knew he secretly enjoyed having that kind of effect on you. He found it amusing to see you flustered, which added an extra layer of charm to your relationship.

Ben leaned in for a soft kiss on your lips. “I mean it,” he said, looking into your eyes. “I love waking up next to you.”

“I love waking up next to you too,” you replied, nestling your head into the crook of his neck.

You both lay there for a few more minutes, basking in the warmth of each other's embrace. The morning light peeked through the curtains, painting the room with a soft golden hue. Everything was calm and peaceful until the sound of your phone's alarm blasted through the serene atmosphere.

“Ugh, already?” you grumbled, reaching over to grab your phone and turn off the alarm.

Ben chuckled. “Time waits for no one, my love.”

You snuggled deeper into his arms, but you knew that you couldn't stay in bed forever. You let out a groan of protest as you rolled out of bed, making your way to the bathroom. As you brushed your teeth and got ready for the day ahead, Ben sat on the bed, scrolling through his phone.

“So, what's on your agenda today?” he asked.

“Just work,” you replied with a sigh. “Same old, same old.”

He nodded in understanding. “Well, when you get back we can cook dinner together and binge-watch our favorite show? How does that sound?”

You smiled at him through the reflection in the mirror. “Perfect.”

As you exited the bathroom and began to get dressed, Ben wrapped his arms around you from behind, resting his chin on your shoulder.

“You know I love mornings like this,” he whispered softly in your ear, placing a loving kiss on your neck.

With contentment, you made your way to the kitchen to have breakfast before heading out to work.

You sat at the kitchen table, sipping your coffee while admiring the way the soft morning light danced gently across your boyfriend's face. The sweet aroma of pancakes filled the kitchen as Ben flipped them over in the skillet.

It was moments like these that made you realize that it was the simple things in life that brought the most happiness. All you needed was the warmth of the kitchen, the comforting aroma of breakfast, and the company of your loved one.

“Those pancakes smell amazing.”

Ben smiled as he lifted his gaze from the frying pan. “That’s because I’m making your favorite, blueberry pancakes.” He returned his gaze to the pan, watching the mixture bubble and sizzle. “Just a few more minutes until they're ready.”

“You truly are the sweetest,” you gushed as you took another sip of your coffee.

Ben set two plates of fluffy blueberry pancakes on the table and sat down across from you.

“You know I only cook, so I can see you smile,” he said with a grin.

You laughed, taking a bite of the fluffy pancakes. “Mmm, well, it's working,” you said with a contented sigh. “These pancakes are amazing.”

Ben chuckled. “What can I say? It's my secret recipe.”

You sat in silence for a brief moment, taking bites of your food while lost in thought. Your gaze lifted to meet his and spoke softly. “Do you remember when we first met?”

Your boyfriend looked up from his plate. “Of course I do. Why?”

You smiled, remembering the day you first crossed paths. “It seems like it was ages ago, doesn't it?”

Ben chuckled, “Yeah, it does. But I remember it like it was yesterday. You were wearing a white sundress and had your hair in a messy bun.”

You laughed in surprise, “I can't believe you remember what I was wearing!”

Ben shook his head, a gleam of amusement in his eyes. “I couldn't take my eyes off of you. I knew I had to come over and talk to you.”

You felt a rush of warmth spread through you as you recalled that moment. “Thank you for doing that,” you said, reaching across the table to take Ben's hand.

He smiled back, his fingers curling around yours. “I'm glad I did. It was the best decision I've ever made.”

For a few moments, the two of you sat in quiet contemplation, lost in your own memories of those early days together. You remembered the butterflies in your stomach, the nervousness that came with holding hands for the first time, the late-night conversations, and the laughter that filled your home. Even though time had passed, those memories remained crystal clear, reminding you of everything you had built together.

Maintaining and strengthening your relationship over the last two years has not always been easy. Many difficulties have arisen along the way, ranging from trust issues to long-distance problems and personal disagreements. Despite these difficulties, you never gave up on each other or your relationship. You continuously worked on establishing and rebuilding trust and resolving issues through open communication, understanding, and forgiveness. You learned to appreciate the importance of resilience and perseverance in any healthy relationship, and never took each other for granted.

You both understood that a relationship requires hard work, patience, and effort from both parties. You knew that love alone is not enough to sustain a relationship in the long term. It requires constant nurturing and attention, as well as a deep-rooted commitment to make it work.

Your love for each other has only grown stronger over time, and you have learned to cherish and appreciate each other more every day.

“I still can't believe how lucky I am,” Ben finally said quietly.

You looked over at him, feeling grateful for the love that radiated out of every word he spoke.

“I feel the same way,” you replied, your words overflowing with genuine affection. “I can't imagine my life without you.”

Ben stood up from his chair and walked over to your side of the table. “You’ll never have to,” he whispered, as he delicately cradled your face in his hands.

Your faces were mere inches apart, and without any hesitation, Ben leaned in and pressed his lips to yours. The gentle caress of his hands against your cheeks sent shivers down your spine.

When you pulled apart, the way Ben gazed at you stirred up a flurry of emotions within your chest. You could feel the words forming on his lips before he even uttered a word.

“I love you,” Ben declared, his voice unwavering. “Always.”

“And I love you,” you said, your eyes shining brightly.

[padfootagain]

Complicated

Hello everyone! I’m answering a request today that was sent a few weeks ago! This request was sent by an anon : “Y/n is a new one of the main cast in S&B(In her 20s) She has a crush on Ben. Anyways she doesn't show it ofc and she was afraid if she will fit with the cast members or not.Yn is a bit shy and introverted. And we know how close Jessei and Ben are but it kinda upsets her cause She's not that close with Ben?!? Idk if I'm portraying it well or not but can you write something like that?!?”

I haven’t included the detail of the reader’s age… simply because the occasion didn’t arise in the fic as I was writing it, I hope it’s okay. So… fluff and a little bit of angst because we are writing for pining idiots and a slightly jealous reader…

I hope you enjoy your fic anon! And I hope everyone else enjoys it too! Tell me what you think about it!

****

Pairing: Ben Barnes x reader

Summary: Ben and you are working together on Shadow and Bone, and have grown closer and closer as the months flew by. But when you truly fall for him, everything becomes complicated…

Warnings: a slightly jealous reader. Some mutual pining. Lots of fluff.

Word count: 4171

Ben Barnes’s Masterlist – Main Masterlist

It’s complicated.

Everything is complicated.

Everything is a mess, and it’s all because of him.

You stare at Ben as he laughs, bubbly and merry and infectious…

You hate the way it makes you feel happy to see him that way. You hate that you can’t just walk over there, across the set, and kiss these lips of his that always seem to be calling for your own…

You can’t do it. You just can’t. It isn’t a possibility, because you’re working together, and he probably doesn’t even like you at all and…

You force your train of thoughts to stop. This is not the right place nor the right time to be contemplating your recent crush on your co-worker. Now, on the contrary, it is time to finish reading your lines one last time before being called for your scene.

But you’re distracted again when Archie nudges you.

“Hey, are you coming to Jessie’s party tonight?” he asks, shoving a small pastry into his mouth.

You smile at him, nodding your head.

“Sure, it sounds fun.”

You’re lying. Blatantly so. You’re not so much into parties like these, but you need to socialize to get along with your co-workers, and you want to fit in the cast. You’re only just arriving for this second season, after all. Even if the shooting has started several weeks ago, you’re still a little uncertain sometimes. But then again, maybe that’s because you always lack confidence…

“Awesome! It’ll be fun, you’ll see! Jessie always throws the best parties!”

You nod again, as if you knew what he is talking about, while already planning some fake excuses to go home early, and a strategy to remain as quiet and alone as possible during the event.

Damn, that introverted part of you really is a pain in the arse sometimes…

“Who’s coming? Everyone?” you ask, closing your script, aware that you will not be able to work before your scene now that your colleague has joined you.

“Yep! Having a hard time convincing our grandpa over there, though,” he jokes, nodding towards Ben. “He’s had a busy week, and he’s exhausted. But I’ll find a way to convince him, don’t worry. I want to get everyone coming tonight.”

“Nice!”

You hope he can manage to convince Ben. You truly do. Because… well, you have a crush on him, after all. A stupid, ridiculous, terribly serious crush on him. And if he can come tonight, the evening might not be so bad, after all…

Speaking of the devil…

Your heart quickens its pace as Ben approaches, a calm, comforting smile on his lips. He looks gentle and kind and a little mischievous, like he always does. He’s in full costume and make-up; dark scars running across his handsome features, and a long leathery coat embroidered with gold floating behind him. It doesn’t match, the scary and intimidating look against the softness in his dark eyes…

“What are you two troublemakers planning now?” he asks, his voice full of humour and teasing.

“Well, we’re talking about tonight. You know, the amazing party you’re planning on missing?” Archie answers.

“Ha… yes, at Jessie’s?”

“Yep!”

“I’ve had such a tiring week, I just want to sleep,” Ben admits.

He seems tempted nonetheless. After all, Jessie does throw the best parties.

“Come on! You don’t have to stay for too long, we’re used to you abandoning us before midnight. Come on, everyone but you has said yes already! Even Y/N is coming!”

Ben turns to you, hesitation intensifying on his features.

“You’re coming too?”

You nod.

“Yep! Sounds fun! You should come too. You can leave early, if you want. But it would be nice to have everyone around. Right, Archie?”

“Absolutely! Ben, you’re coming. That’s decided!”

Ben laughs, shaking his head.

“I haven’t said yes…”

“Now, come on. Y/N is asking you to come! Look at how disappointed she looks that you’re not coming…”

You feign a sad pout, batting your lashes, and Ben can’t refrain a laugh. He rolls his eyes but then again… if you’re coming…

Then, it gives him a perfect excuse to see you. He knows he shouldn’t think of you this way. Because this… silly, crazy, extremely intense crush he has on you can only make everything complicated. You’re working together, and you probably don’t even feel the same and…

… and yet, every time he sees you, his heart skips a beat. And he longs to see you, even if it’s just from across the room, and if he listened to himself, he would admit that he longs for far more than simply being near you…

But then again, it would make his life unbearably complicated. And you… you probably don’t feel the same, so why bother?

“Please, come to the party tonight!” you ask again, offering him a friendly smile. “You’re the person I know best in the cast, as we’ve had plenty of scenes together already… it’ll be less fun without you!”

Now, you’re looking at him with these pleading eyes, and you’re saying it’ll make you happy to see him there…

… how could he say no to that? How could he say no to you?

He heaves a sigh, but nods anyway.

“Alright, alright… I’ll come.”

“Yes!”

Archie and you share a high-five, while Ben keeps on laughing at the two of you.

But then again… if he can see you a little longer, outside of the studio, it’s worth the dark bags that will grow even more under his eyes…

Ben is blowing his cheeks, miming something big and round. You have no idea what he’s doing, and look at him with round eyes, scraping in every corner of your mind… what on Earth is he doing?

He adds a moustache with a finger under his nose and frowns hard, as if he’s angry and disdainful… Still, you’ve got no clue… it could be anyone…

His face changes back to his normal demeanour, and traces something that looks like a lightning bolt on his forehead…

And you got it! At last!

“Dursley! Vernon Dursley!”

Ben claps his hands and cheers, right as the timer rings. It was the last round of charades for the night, and as Ben comes to join you on the sofa, giving you a high-five for this last guess of yours, you’re all awaiting the final results.

You know the results are close… Jessie and Freddy have done an amazing job tonight as well. You wait for Calahan to count the last points, Danielle peering over his large shoulder to get a glimpse while she sips on her glass of red wine.

It’s merry. You’re happy to have come to the party, in the end. It’s still quite early, you know the mood is shifting to a more ‘partying’ colour, and you have no doubts that after this game, Kit is going to put on some music and start some kind of dancing competition. You know you’ll like this part of the night a little less, but so far, it’s almost 11 and you’re quite happy and at ease still.

Besides, Fortune decided to pair you up with Ben for this game, when you drew his name from one of Jessie’s hats. And as he sits down next to you, making the cushion bend a little under his weight, as he shifts next to you to get comfortable, as he leans forward to grab his glass of wine on the coffee table, as his shoulder brushes against yours with each of his movements…

Yes, the evening isn’t so bad, after all…

“Oh, we have some winners…” Calahan theatrically raises up his hands, picking the sheet of paper holding the results. “And the winners are… Ben and Y/N!”

Ben and you cheer, and you are quite surprised when he pulls you in a tight hug.

Warm. Safe. That’s the best way to describe his embrace, even if it lasts just a couple of seconds. It’s enough to make your head spin, your heart race under your ribs, you’re intoxicated already with his soft wooden smell…

But he pulls away soon, too soon… he has to. Breathing in your sweet perfume, and holding you close, feeling the air leaving your lungs to collide with his cheek and ear… it’s too much for him to handle. He’s already blushing, he can’t let you see how he feels…

It feels cold when he pulls away, empty. His embrace is filled with air again, and he hates it. You seemed to fit so well in his arms, your warmth spreading through his frame…

He pushes the thought away. This evening is nice, merry, full of light. He enjoys it. He knows that Kit will soon turn on the music, and he’ll soon be a little bit bored, as he won’t take part in the dancing. It’s alright, though. He hopes you won’t dance either. He hopes you’ll stay a little bit longer…

Around the two of you, people are teasing your team, saying you’ve cheated, laughing at your outraged faces. It’s fun and light-hearted.

The back of your hand brushes Ben’s as you shift on the couch, and your breath gets stuck in your throat. It’s electrifying, this sensation…

You need to stay a little longer to the party, just to socialize, to make sure you’ll fit in with the group. But you have to admit that you’re a little bit uncomfortable when Kit starts the music, and most people start dancing.

You decide that you deserve a little bit of intimacy, and excuse yourself to the bathroom.

You stay there a few minutes, just to recharge your social batteries a little. You’re hesitating between aiming for the kitchen or the sofa as you walk out the tiny room. The kitchen will be a little quieter, you reckon. But then again, Ben will probably be in the living room…

You’re smiling at the thought of talking to him again when you step in the living room. Everybody is dancing, except for Freddy and Amita who are chatting, sitting on the couch. You’re looking for Ben, but can’t spot him anywhere. He’s not dancing, and you’re not surprised. You aim for the kitchen.

He’s standing there alright. A glass in his hand, he’s leaning against the counter, laughing with Jessie. She leans against him, they’re standing against each other.

And you can’t help it. You wish you could stop the feeling from spreading through your veins, but you can’t. You wish you could stop yourself from being jealous, but you can’t…

Apparently, there’s nothing romantic between these two, but sometimes… like now… you envy their connection.

Because Ben doesn’t lean against you like that. He doesn’t laugh so hard with you. He doesn’t… he doesn’t act like that with you. And perhaps that’s yet another sign that he doesn’t see anything more than a friend in you…

You take a deep breath, turning around to face the dancing group again. The music is loud and pulsing. After seeing Ben like this… it’s a little too much…

“Hey, Y/N!”

You don’t turn around to face Ben, even if he’s calling you. Instead, you ignore him, act like you haven’t heard anything, and stride across the room. Your feet guide you to the front door, and you grab your coat as you hurry out of the apartment.

You feel ridiculous for feeling this way. You have no rights to be jealous, you’re nothing more than a friend to him. Still… still it hurts to see him so close to someone else…

“Y/N!”

You freeze. You’re waiting for the elevator, in the middle of the corridor. It smells of cigarettes, the white walls a little bit yellowed by nicotine and tobacco…

“Y/N? Where are you going?”

You turn around, at last. You can’t avoid it anymore. Ben is standing there, on the threshold of Jessie’s apartment. He’s frowning, staring at you. He doesn’t seem angry though, only taken aback.

The doors of the elevator open behind you, bathing your frame in a cold white light. They open fully with a little ‘ding’. You struggle to swallow, before you can speak, extending your arm inside the elevator to keep its doors open for you.

“I’m going home. I’m tired. Besides… dancing isn’t my strong suit so… better head out,” you explain, hoping that Ben won’t notice the way your voice is shaking.

He seems disappointed. If he wanted to hide his reaction, he’s bad at it. He gives you a smile anyway.

“Okay… Humm… Would you mind if I walked to the subway with you?”

“Don’t you want to stay a little longer?”

“Not really. I’m knackered. You had to convince me to come, remember?”

“Right… okay then.”

Ben disappears for a mere second, just to grab his coat. Soon, you’re entering the elevator together.

He has a shy but warm smile on his lips. He can’t really summon anything else right now. You’re standing right next to him, you don’t seem to mind that your shoulders and arms are brushing against each other. He does though. He minds terribly, because it makes his heart pounder in his chest, and he can’t breathe properly. He can feel butterflies starting their flight across his stomach, and he can’t take any more of it. He takes a step back.

It breaks your heart. The way he adds distance between the two of you, when earlier with Jessie he…

You push the thought away as the doors open again, and you hurry out of the tiny space in favour of the large hall of the building, then the street.

It’s springtime in Budapest, the air is still chilly despite the warmth that has started to rise during the day. But now, it’s night time and the air is cold and makes you shiver despite your coat. You welcome the feeling though, it makes you forget Ben’s warmth…

“You’re calling for a cab?” Ben asks, standing right behind you.

But you shake your head.

“No, I’ll just walk for a bit. Then take the bus.”

“Alright…”

“You’re calling a taxi?”

“No… No, I thought… do you mind if I join you?”

“No… not at all.”

His smile is brighter this time, and you can’t help the way it makes your heart skip a beat. You match his smile without even noticing…

Soon, you’ve settled in a leisurely pace. None of you seem willing to hurry. Why would you? You both long to spend as much time together as possible…

Ben is the first to break the silence that has settled between the two of you. In the distance, traffic hums in a regular pattern. There is a rhythm to the night. Still busy despite the darkness and the glimmering lights. It’s a little shushed though, distant. It comes only out of the large streets and boulevards, the small alleys are quiet, sleepy. As you walk further down the street, bathed in the golden streetlights, you tighten your hold on your coat. The wind pushes papers abandoned on the street, they roll in a shuffling noise that matches the rustling of the tree leaves.

“Any plans for the weekend?” Ben asks, burying his hands in the pockets of his black jacket.

“No… just sleep. A lot of rest. And some lines to learn,” you give him an amused smile, and he chuckles.

“Yeah, I feel your pain.”

“What about you?”

“Same, basically. Have a busy week coming again.”

“Yeah… they seem determined to make you work crazy hours these days.”

“It’s okay. I’m used to it by now. I just hope to catch on some sleep this weekend, so I won’t have to hide these dark bags under my eyes with too much make up.”

You chuckle, and he wishes you could laugh. A full-on laugh. He likes the sound of these…

Jessie’s words come back to his mind, right when he saw you leaving her apartment. He remembers what she told him, and it bothers him.

You should stop overthinking it and tell her while you still have a chance.

Is there someone else in your life? And why did you leave like this? You were almost… running away…

Maybe Jessie’s right. Everyone on set seems to have picked up that he likes you. That he has a crush on you. Maybe he should stop thinking so much about the consequences but… he can’t help it. He’s a rational man. He wishes, sometimes, for a little bit more freedom. For a little bit more naivety in his actions. But he’s lived long enough to learn that one ought to think before acting.

He heaves a sigh, without noticing, busy with his own thoughts. It makes you look up at him with a frown.

“Ben? You’re okay?”

“Hmm? Yeah, sure.”

“Why this desperate sigh, then?” you tease, amused.

“I’m sorry, I was… lost in thought…”

“Come on, tell me! A penny for your thought!”

You’re cute. It’s almost annoying how adorable you look right now. A glint of mischief alit in your eyes, and a tender smile on your lips. You look soft, domestic almost, holding tightly your coat around your frame. He wishes he could wrap an arm around you, pull you to him, use the excuse of the chilly weather to keep you close. But he knows you’re shy, introverted, and he doesn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable. He knows he’s a tactile kind of guy, but not everyone is. He doesn’t want to go too far.

Besides… if he does hold you close… will his poor little heart survive?

But he’s being ridiculous with all this. He’s not a teenager anymore. He knows how life works, how relationships work, what his feelings for you mean. He’s got to stop being so shy around you. Jessie says you like him too… maybe she’s right…

If he’s wrong, everything will become complicated. But then again… sometimes… complicated is nicer than simple.

He takes a deep breath, before diving…

“Actually… I was wondering… do you have someone in your life?”

Your eyes widen, your eyebrows shoot up… you look more than surprised…

“I… no, I’m single. Why?”

Ben shrugs, trying to calm his racing heart.

“Just… I was just wondering.”

“You?”

“Me?”

You chuckle, as he doesn’t seem to understand what you mean.

“What about you? Are you single?” you repeat, and he blushes hard, silently cursing himself.

What a moron…

“I’m single too,” he answers.

“I… why are you asking me this though?”

He notices how you shy away a little. How you bend your head. How nervous you look.

But he can’t back down this time. He’s got to do something about all this.

“Just… asking.”

“Why?”

“I thought… maybe we could… go have some diner together? Or a coffee? Or… anything you’d like, really.”

You freeze. You stop dead, standing still in the middle of the street. In a nearby alley, you hear someone singing drunkenly. You ignore the sound though. You merely stare at Ben. He’s so handsome like this, his frame tainted golden under a lamppost…

“Are you… asking me on a date?” you stutter.

“Yeah, I am.”

“Why?”

Ben blinks, an amused smile appearing on his lips.

“Why do you think I’m asking you on a date? Because I… want to go on a date with you.”

“Yes, but… I… me?”

His smile falters, he looks down at his feet, kicks into an invisible pebble, his hands still buried in his pockets. He doesn’t want you to see the way he clenches his fists…

“It’s okay if you don’t want to. I get it. It’s not going to be the first time a woman says no…”

“I’m not saying no!”

“Are you saying yes, then?”

“I just… I thought…”

But then, you remember the way he acts with Jessie, and he’s not like this with you. He didn’t offer you his arm as you walked together, the way he always does when she’s around and he…

You shake your head. You like him. If you’re to be honest with yourself, you do feel a little bit more than a crush for him. A lot more, actually.

But you’re not stupid. You’re not a teenager anymore, you know how these things work. And you don’t want to get your heart broken.

Maybe he’s just doing this to make her jealous… the thought breaks your heart…

“I don’t think you mean that,” you answer earnestly.

Ben looks up at you again, frowning hard.

“What?”

“We’re working together…”

“I know… but I don’t think it would be a problem. But then again… I can wait. If you want us to finish shooting the show before we can go on a date… I’ll wait. I’ll ask you again once we’re not working together anymore.”

You know he means it. You can see it in his brown eyes. Brown… they’re fully black though. You can’t see where his irises start, where his pupils end…

His gaze is earnest as much as it is hypnotic.

You’re more puzzled than ever.

“But… I thought… you and Jessie…”

But Ben rolls his eyes, almost annoyed.

“We’re friends. Nothing more. People like gossiping, that’s all.”

“I’ve seen the way you act with her. You two are very close.”

“And?”

“And… I thought you… were like that…”

“She’s just a friend.”

“But you’re not like that with me.”

He frowns again, but lets you continue.

“You’re… not… close to me. Not like that. I thought it was because… because you’re closer to her, than you are with me.”

“It’s just different.”

“You’re always touching and hugging everyone… but not me. It’s not just Jessie… I think it’s about me. I thought you were… friendly with me. That’s all.”

“I just…”

He lets out a breathy chuckle.

“You make me nervous,” he admits, and there’s something a little sad in his smile now. Or… not quite sad but… fragile. “Besides… you’re shy. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. I like hugs, but I’m also aware some people don’t like that.”

“I like hugs,” you answer.

Which is quite ridiculous, and Ben can’t help but laugh.

“Good to know.”

He takes a step closer, his heart beating so fast. He hasn’t felt so giddy and excited and utterly nervous in years… what are you doing to him?

“I like you,” he confesses in a breath, letting it all out in a shaky whisper, and you stop breathing altogether at the sound. “I like you… a lot. And I’m just… nervous and… afraid to make you uncomfortable. But I… Y/N you can’t imagine how much I want to hold you right now and… touch you and… kiss you and…”

“Do it then.”

He falls silent, and you do too. Because it isn’t really like you to be so bold, but you can’t help it. You’re not really thinking anymore. His words register into your brain, you make sense of them, and you want him to do everything he’s saying out loud, and that’s all you know, all that you’re aware of. That, and the fact that he’s standing very close to you, maybe a little too close, close enough for your chests to brush against each other as you fill up your lungs with air…

“What did you say?” he asks, his voice shaking.

He’s searching for something in your eyes. You think it might be reassurance…

“I said that you should do it.”

“It?”

“All that you’ve just said.”

A crooked smile appears on his lips, his hands coming out of his pockets to reach up towards your cheeks.

“Even the part where I’m kissing you?”

You smile, nodding.

“Especially that part, I think.”

“Alright… but then… can we have a date.”

“Okay. But… everything is going to be complicated. Like… we work together and… and it’s going to be a mess and…”

“Y/N?”

“Yes?”

His palms have reached your cheeks, warm and a little calloused, and you adore the feeling. You lean into his touch, his fingertips lost in your hair.

“Do you want me to kiss you now?” he asks, leaning closer, his lips bare centimetres away from yours.

“Yes. Yes, I do… but…”

“Then let’s just get things impossibly complicated… and let’s kiss too.”

You’ve closed your eyes at the feeling of his warm breath fanning against your mouth and…

… and then he closes the gap between you. And it’s gentle, almost shy. Delicate. It becomes more heated though, after he pulls away for a second, just long enough to change the angle of his lips upon yours, so he can have better access to your mouth, so he can deepen the kiss and…

Christ, that is too good… too good to be true…

When you part, you’re both out of breath.

“So… are you convinced that I like you now?” Ben asks, brushing his nose against yours.

You open your eyes again, just to fall in his gaze.

“Kind of, yes.”

“So… What about Sunday for the date?”

*********************

Taglist : @reg-arcturus-black @wolfmoonmusic

[reg-arcturus-black]

The Room is on Fire, Invisible Smoke

Soft!Billy Russo x Female reader

Part 2/2

Warnings: (kinda major) sexual hints, lots of drinking

Words: it's a lot longer than I was expecting... 3.3 k

Part 1 here

gif not mine

You sat with your head in your hands, wondering how to get Billy back. He was never really yours to begin with so then why did it feel like you had lost him? So he was too mad to even talk to you but not enough to come save you from a baseless panic attack? What was he even mad about? You were honestly afraid to know the answer. You were sure that you had lost the only good thing in your life, no thanks to your stubborn self. If only you would have fessed up instead of waiting around for him.

You leaned against the door, hearing Bill walk away from the house he had spent countless nights in. In separate beds, of course, except for that one night... Shaking your head of the thoughts of that night, you decided to go for a shower instead and get ready for work. You had a long day ahead of you filled with torturous colleagues and a boss who loved to micromanage.

You had sworn that all you needed from the company was the work experience of three years and then you would fly off to London for a better position and salary. With the three years almost done, you were closer to your dreams than ever. Especially now that you had destroyed the only thing keeping you back in New York.

You could feel yourself physically filling up with dread as you drove closer and closer to your office. It had been a long time now but the feeling never seemed to go away. Bracing yourself to endure another never-ending day, you entered the office building and scanned your ID card. The swivel gate let you walk in to what you thought hell looked and felt like.

'Just till 5...' you muttered to yourself and managed to get in the elevator before it closed. It was so crowded, you barely had any place to breathe, let alone stand.

'Cutting it awfully close, again, I see,' you heard someone say from the back.

Jim. You would have recognised that voice anywhere. Not because you loved him. But because you hated him - and that was an understatement. He had done everything possible to make your professional life miserable. He would steal credit, talk shit about you to your boss and the others and would constantly look down on you. He would take every chance he could to humiliate you publicly.

'I clocked in 18 minutes early, you dickhead,' you whispered the last part without turning back. You walked off the elevator before the doors had even opened up completely and practically threw your bag on the desk. Jim had the capacity to ruin your entire day with just one single sentence. And the worst part was that he knew he had this effect on you so he would do it even more, just of out of spite.

You threw yourself into work to distract yourself from the thoughts of Billy and Jim and your stupid office. It was a pretty uneventful day until your boss came up to the desk right behind you and congratulated Jim for submitting all his work perfectly within the deadline. It would have been fine if that would have been it. But no, your misogynist boss just had to come to you and praise his work and ask you to 'take inspiration from him'.

That day, you didn't even wait till 5 to clock out and left storming out the big glass door at 4 pm. Rushing home, you changed into your comfiest pajamas and grabbed a big tub of ice cream. You were on your fifth episode of The Vampire Diaries when you took a deep breath and turned off Netflix.

You were tired of being stuck in this loop. With your professional life terrible and your love life being uncertain, no thanks to Billy's unwillingness to confess or agree to anything, you wanted to just run away. You grabbed your phone and were about to call him to sort everything out before realising that you didn't care. Well, you did but it was emotionally exhausting. Choosing to put that aside, you put on your best, little-est, black dress and left the house.

It was usually Billy who took you out to all these fancy bars but you were sick and tired of being dependent on him. Or on anyone else for that matter. You wanted to go out tonight, drink till the early hours of the morning and be a woman who needed no one. A strong, powerful woman with red lips and revealing little black dresses. Confidently, you grabbed a seat at one of the shadiest bars of New York.

While ordering 3 tequila shots, you saw the bartender clearly staring at your chest before looking away awkwardly and getting you your drinks. You had gulped down all three one after the other in a single minute when you heard a bar stool being pulled closer to yours.

'Please get the lady's next drink on me,' a handsome man in a black shirt said, looking straight at you, not breaking you eye contact.

'In that case' you addressed the bartender. 'I'll have your most expensive drink please.' You winked at the beautiful stranger. 'All thanks to the gracious gentleman,' you smirked, rubbing your hand lightly on his chiseled arm.

See? This was fun. This was easy. Flirting with men, knowing exactly what you wanted and getting that because the man would reciprocate as well. Reciprocate? Hell, he initiated the whole thing so who were you to back down and deny yourself a handsome man with a sharp jawline, hair of a God and the voice of a rockstar.

You touched him as much as you could, shamelessly flirting- it was your guilty pleasure. And why wouldn't it be? It was not like Billy was waiting for you. And you weren't waiting for him either. Not anymore.

You were on your third glass of scotch when your senses started going numb and you could feel your inhibitions lowering. It was all fun and games and you intended to keep it that way. His hand was on your thigh now and it kept moving upwards every once in a while. You didn't plan to stop it either. Besides, the night was still young.

Being with this name-less stranger was so much better than being with Billy. At least that way, you could just have fun and then forget all about it the next morning. Unlike with Billy. Every word, every moment spent with him seemed to cling on to you. You couldn't get rid of it no matter how much you tried. Even his darkness, his shadows seemed alluring to you. As if it was inviting you in. And the truth was, you did not mind being swallowed up whole by his darkness. He, however, did not want that.

'Lost in thoughts, beautiful?' the stranger asked. His raspy voice sent a chill up your spine. 'I have a few ways to bring you back to earth,' he said, moving his hands even farther up your thighs, dangerously close to the hem of your dress.

Your hand moved from his back to the back of his collar, gripping it tightly as your eyes closed in anticipation.

'It might look because of the alcohol but I do have quite an effect on you,' he said as your answer was let out by a shaky moan.

If this is what destruction felt like, you were ready to embrace it and let it consume you. It was only when you wanted to look at his beautiful face that you opened your eyes and your sight fell on your drink. And you were pretty sure it had changed it's color.

You were drunk anyway, you thought. What's a roofied drink more? You gulped the drink in one go and before you knew it, you were kissing the stranger, your hands all over his face and neck. It was only when you were kissing him that you realised how good it felt. How good it was to kiss someone wantonly and having someone kiss you back.

"Give me a minute, will you? And clear the tab while I am gone." You said, breaking the kiss and walking away without waiting for his answer.

You found a relatively quiet corner of the bar and pulled out your phone. This was a victory moment for you and Billy needed to know. He needed to know how there are others who want you and you are willing to give yourself to them completely.

It had rang barely thrice before he received your call.

"You know what, Bills?" Your words slurred. "I am kissing the most handsome man on the planet and it's not you... And it feels soooo good, you have no idea...."

"Y/N, are you drunk? Where are -"

"His hands are working magic, Billy... I am pretty sure he put something in my drink but I don't care!" You practically screamed. "At least someone wants me... And I am gonna take him back to my place and let him do things to me, Bills... You're welcome to watch if you want but just know..." At this point, you had lost all train of thought. "You had me and lost me and I am gonna have so much fun with him tonight, Bills..."

You hung up abruptly and stumbled your way back to the bar.

"Let's go," you said and grabbed his hand, pulling him towards the door of the club.

"Where?" He asked.

"My place," you said, pushing him against the wall outside the bar and grazing your fingers gently over his neck. "My turn to bring you back to earth..."

He was about to lean in closer and kiss you but you moved away and called for a cab. The entire cab ride home, for some inexplicable reason, you sat as far away from him as possible. All of a sudden, you weren't liking his touch anymore or the way he was looking at you. It seemed almost... Animalistic. The hunger in his eyes, the impatience in his hands, they all seemed very obvious.

You were fine in the dim lights of the bar and the mood that had been set. You were on your way to a night you were sure you would never forget and yet, every part of you felt uncomfortable. Maybe if it would have been Billy -

You did not want to think about him. At all. So choosing to focus on the handsome man next to you, you moved in closer to him, practically on his lap and wrapped your arms around his neck.

"Oh, the things I am going to do you," you whispered in his ear and felt his hand removing the strap of your dress as he kissed your shoulder. "Patience, baby," you practically moaned into his ear and felt his grip tighten on your back.

You wasted no time in getting down from the cab and pulling him towards your building. He had started kissing you in the elevator before you were even at the house, trying to unlock the door. Something about it felt wrong. As if your mind wasn't completely in it and his touch didn't feel right anymore. However, you had made up your mind and were going to take this stranger home, no matter what.

It was only when you were too busy kissing him to unlock your door that you heard someone clear their throat.

"Busy much?"

You would have recognised that voice out of a lineup. Billy.

"Go away man," your lover said, paying no heed to him and continued to kiss you.

Your eyes, however, were now on Billy. His face had seemed to go red and he was clenching his jaw.

Before you knew it, Billy was separating the two of you forcibly.

"Why don't you go away?" He asked angrily. "Given the fact that I am Y/N's boyfriend and you should leave before I beat you to a pulp for putting something in her drink."

"Geez, whatever fucked up agreement you two have, I am out," he said and turned around to leave, buttoning up his shirt's top buttons again.

"No, wait, don't go, he's not my boyfriend!" you cried, trying to follow after him but drunk you on heels was a bad idea and you would have fallen if you had run after him. "Stranger!" You cried, trying to stop him. "Handsome man! Loveerrrrrr!!! Hey, black shirt!! Come back, I'll show you a good time," you giggled, almost falling down.

You allowed yourself to lean against the wall and turned around, only to find yourself face to face with Billy.

Rolling your eyes at him, you made your way back to the door and unlocking it, went inside, slamming the door on his face. He, however, had other plans and followed you inside. "You're NOT my boyfriend, Billy. What do you even want? Why did you send him away? I was having fun!"

"Are you crazy?" He practically screamed but lowered his volume and went to get you a glass of water.

"What were you about to do, Y/N?" He asked worriedly. "Are you really that determined to get yourself into trouble?"

"It wasn't trouble, Bills," you answered. "I just wanted to feel wanted for one freaking night."

"You brought a strange man home, Y/N! You were drunk and practically all over him. What if -"

"It is better than waiting around for you, Bills! I did everything I could for you! Hell, I was even ready to sleep with you! But what did that lead to? Nothing!"

"You pushed me away, Y/N. I didn't want to sleep with you because I didn't want to ruin what we have so you responded by pushing me away..." He replied, seeming tired now.

He knew it was the most cliche excuse but he cherished the bond he shared with you. And a meaningless one night stand would have ruined it. He couldn't risk that.

"Y/N, I-" He started but you weren't in the living room anymore. He found you instead in the kitchen, drinking directly from the vodka bottle.

"Whoa, okay, you need to stop," he said, gently taking away the bottle from your hand.

"You need to stop," you repeated, words barely making sense at this point. "You need to take inspiration from him... You're late... You're crazy... This is what my life has come to, Bills!" You screamed. "My work life is a big joke but I have to do it because I want to be independent! You on the other hand .. I don't have to keep going in circles with you because I am done, Bills! If you don't want me, I will find someone who does! What don't you get about it?"

"So you will intentionally put yourself in danger Y/N? Knowing that you will regret it for the rest of you life?"

"I don't fucking care, Billy! I don't care!"

This was the point when you finally allowed yourself to sit down and cry. "I got a hundred thrown out speeches I almost said to you, Bills.... But what even is the point? It's better to just be alone than to hurt and be hurt... Enough is enough... I - I have loved you with all my heart, Bills... But there's no point because - because you don't... And I just, I can't give you my heart... It's like, each night I sleep, I know I will wake up in a burning room and be surrounded by an invisible smoke but that smoke is YOU... You make me so helpless, Billy. I - I don't know what to do. Every part of me screams out that you might feel the same way but nothing ever shows it... I am a mess! Look at me... This uncomfortable dress, the make up I don't even like... Each day, all day, I keep asking myself, who could ever leave but then who could stay? And you know what happens whenever I look at you? I feel like you could stay... But you never do, Billy... You never do..." You were sobbing by this point.

"There are times, you know," you continue, wiping your eyes. "What if I don't need you? What if I am alright right here? By myself. It's better than acting like a child who never grew up and will do anything to get your attention but I am sick and tired of it, Bills... Each night, I go to sleep begging you to help me hold on to you... But you just don't care... And I am better off... I really am..."

Billy was not expecting this. He had come prepared to scare away the random guy you were bringing home and then putting you to bed. He did not come prepared for you sobbing on your kitchen floor, drunk beyond words and spilling out your secrets.

He gently helped you up and took you to your bedroom. "I am gonna wait outside," he said, talking your face in his hands and gently wiping away your tears. "Why don't you take all the make up that you don't like off and freshen up and I'll be right on the other side of the door?"

Too exhausted to say or even think anything, you worked like a robot, getting in the shower and changing into comfier clothes.

The moment Billy heard your door lock click, he knocked and entered with a jug of water and Advil. "Come here," he said, leading you to your own bed and sat down with you. "I am so sorry, Y/N," he said, caressing your cheeks with his thumb. "That I ever made you feel like I didn't love you... Because that's all I have ever done and that's all I am ever going to do... And I will probably die doing it... I am sorry that I let you keep building up walls against me... I am sorry that I hurt you over and over and over again... I am sorry I got mad at you for meeting other men when I should have put in efforts to be a man who deserves you... I am sorry that you kept suffering every single day and I only watched from afar instead of holding you through it... I don't know how much of it will you remember tomorrow but I promise you Y/N, this moment onwards, you are never going through anything alone ever again. Not shitty bosses or shitty colleagues, not shitty days and especially not shitty men. I promise I will be there to love you through them all, no matter what... Because I really do love you, Y/N... More than I imagined was humanly possible... My heart fills up to the brim whenever I look at you, Y/N... Every time you laugh, the world seems a lot better and it feels like nothing can ever go wrong... And I am so sorry that I never told you how precious you are to me... You are the light of life, Y/N... I love you so freaking much..."

He placed a small kiss on you head and felt you melt into his arms.

"I wanna sleep, Bills..." You sighed.

He was afraid how much of it were you going to remember but your health was what mattered to him at the moment. He turned off the lights and gently tucked you in.

"I know you're an independent woman, Y/N and you don't need anyone. But I promise that if I cannot be the light that guides you, then I promise to sit with you in the dark... And I hope you always remember that..." He kissed your hand before walking towards the door.

"Stay," you whispered sleepily, your eyes barely open. "Please..."

And stay he did.

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Taglist: @dreamyjcel @doriangray-lover @el-de-phi

[etherealacoustic]

Padfoot Saves Sirius

Pairing - Wolfstar x daughter! Remus Lupin x Sirius Black, James Potter x Lily Evans.

Warnings - none!

Ophelia Lupin-Black was deep in a peaceful and quiet slumber. It was way past eight thirty in the morning and the girl was still asleep, not moving a muscle as she dreamt happily.

But of course, peace doesn't last long in the Lupin-Black household.

It's almost impossible to have a moment of stillness when you've got people like Remus, Sirius and Ophelia Lupin-Black.

The three most stubborn, mischievous, chaotic and humourous people living under the same roof. Yeah, not a good idea at times.

The door of Ophelia's bedroom opened slowly with a creak and in stepped Sirius Lupin-Black, the 'Black smirk' painted his lips as he tip-toed towards the bed.

"From what I think you're about to do," said Remus in a soft voice. "You probably don't value your life very much".

Sirius glanced at his husband who was leaning against the door frame, arms crossed over the maroon sweater and a disapproving look on his face.

"Oh come on! It'll be fun!" Sirius whined.

"You do know what happened the last time you woke her up like that don't you?"

The other stood silent as small clips of that horrendous day ram in his mind, reminding him of the tortures he had to go through.

"But I was Sirius' last time. Now I'll wake her up as Padfoot. It'll be fine," he shrugged it off and turned towards his sleeping daughter with a grin.

Looking at Remus, Sirius gave him one last wink before transforming into Padfoot and quite literally jumping on the bed four times like a hyper wild animal.

"Da," a low growl and groan was heard making him stop immediately as he cautiously looked at Ophelia.

"Morning love!" Remus chirped in and quickly went over to sit beside her, not wanting Sirius to face the inevitable wrath.

Ophelia gave him a sleepy smile, but then her face hardened as she turned to look at her Dad, her eyes narrowed under furrowed eyebrows.

Last time, Sirius hadn't transformed into Padfoot to wake her up. So this day, he thought he had some advantage as the girl loved his Animagus form.

So deciding to test his theory, Padfoot stepped closer and whined loudly like a wounded animal. He placed his hand on his paws and looked up at her with those big, innocent puppy dog eyes.

"Oh damn you and your bloody Animagus form," she swore and couldn't help herself from scratching Padfoot behind his ears.

His tail started wagging instantly and he pounced, paws on her shoulder as he tickled her face with licks.

"Alright, alright stop!" She shrieked with laughter and tried to push him away.

"Pa! Help me! He's ticking- it tickles!" Ophelia gasped out and dodged her playful father as best as she could

But instead of assisting, Remus joined forces with Sirius and started tickling her sides mercilessly.

"Hey!!" She shouted as her stomach ached and tears fell down on her cheeks from laughing so hard.

The pair stopped their malicious teasing and Sirius transformed back to his self. Both of them smiling at the uncountable happiness lighting Ophelia's face.

Small chuckles were still escaping her lips as she wiped the tears and clutched at her slightly aching abdomen. "That wasn't a fair fight".

"Life's never fair, darling," Sirius grinned and messed up her hair, earning him another disgruntled groan.

"Yeah yeah," she rolled her eyes and rested her head onto Remus' shoulder.

"Up you get now," He whispered and smiled as he tried smoothening her rumpled black locks. "Reg will be waiting".

At that her face immediately lit up and she grinned uncontrollably, "You should've reminded me!"

"You see that, Rem? See how her face is practically glowing? I see who's your favourite," Sirius huffed and pouted.

"Don't worry, Da. You're definitely in the top five," she smiled, failing to hide the obvious mischief behind the innocent look that grazed her face.

"I love you too," he grumbled but then rolled his eyes and chuckled as she hugged him tightly.

"You got away with trouble this time Da," Ophelia suddenly muttered. "But I promise I'll get you back for it soon enough," she smirked at him.

"I'll be waiting," Sirius grinned back and moved to sit to her right, his back leaning against the headboard.

"Oh sure you will. You'll be delighted for the upcoming surprise after knowing Uncle Reg and Pa will be helping me," she chuckled like a maniac before going to take a bath.

Sirius' head snapped over to his husband before you could even say mischief. "Moony? Is this true?"

All Remus could do was smirk and laugh as the other's eyes were wide open.

"What kind of outrageous betrayal is this?!" Sirius cried out dramatically. "My own husband and brother turning against me? This is ridiculous!"

"Be prepared, Da!" Ophelia's shout was heard from the bathroom. And despite not seeing her, the two could hear the grin spreading across her face.

"I'll plan a better one with James!" The man-child yelled back in response.

"Go on then! Team Ophelia has the alliance of Lily Evans!"

And that was the comeback that had left Sirius with no words to retort.

[rae-gar-targaryen]

between daddy darkling and bad boy billy....

and just the... stark difference that is character playing and actual bin bons....

i'm sorry i'm just really missing writing for his characters as of late so i see his face on my dash and squeal. I'm fine. this is fine.

Have you SEEN the T-Mobile commercial yet? It's the most bin bons thing to ever bons. It's the Hyrise of commercials. 🤣🤣

-- here, have some badboy babe Billy for your sweet tooth. Hope you like red wine and daaaaark chocolate. Nsfw below the cut (fingering and general nastiness, 18+) 😘

You weren't to be trusted.

Billy was aware of the presence of powered individuals -- enhanced, the preferred term was. You didn't possess super strength like the plucky, unyielding P.I. You weren't gifted with an immortal chi. And you certainly weren't bulletproof.

No, your ability bordered on the supernatural. A telekinetic, like "Carrie," but with less... all of that. And you'd proven yourself useful to him -- for the right price, of course.

But for all of your witchy wonderments, the biggest surprise for Billy wasn't that you could draw just anything to you with the power of your mind.

It was how you'd somehow managed to ensnare him.

Drawing him ever-closer with the power of your mind. It was the only explanation for why your eyes haunted his dreams. Why he awoke with the ghost of your touch along his skin, like spidersilk and whispers.

Somewhere along the line, professional had become personal. Far, far too personal. He was consumed. Dark, whiskey-drenched eyes dying of thirst, dying to drink you in.

And the moments he shared with you? He could appreciate your penchant for darkness, destruction. Anarchy. Two halves of a jagged, chaotic whole.

Running wild in the night together. Running, like rivulets of blood and longing stained with starvation. Clashed together. With tongue, lips, teeth, and claws.

"Oh, baby," Billy crooned mockingly, his thumb tracing along your upper lip, a little more force behind the press than necessary, enjoying the sight of blooming color behind your lips the more he forced. "You act so big and bad, don't you? But I know what you are. You're just a nasty little girl who likes to play rough. Isn't that right?"

"Yeah," you breathed. The word left your lips a piteous whine as frustrated tears pricked the outer corners of your eyes, clawing, begging, preening.

Anything for Billy to touch you how you liked.

His other hand cupping your clothed cunt, as he continued to run his thumb along your lips. Playing you. A practiced middle finger now stroking along the center seam of your panties, sliding along your folds, reducing you to doe eyes, whimpers and, "please, please Billy."

Billy preened, pleased that for once it was you at his mercy.

"I'll give you what you want, if you think you can ask for it," he breathed. Smoke, honey, and filthy promises.

Billy regarded you from above. Recklessly beautiful, blown-glass eyes and heated skin, blazing with the good kind of frustration at Billy's not-quite-enough touch. His eyes roved over your neck and clavicle, now studded with teeth marks -- his, of course -- and the beautiful bloom of what would become hickeys in the pale light of morning.

"Please?" You blinked.

And who was he to deny? At mercy of your magic.

A whiskey chuckle leaves Billy's lips as he finally, mercifully, slides two long fingers inside of you, your hips writhing toward his touch.

The destruction he wrought upon you... That you let him... had never been more intoxicating. How you, with the ability to crush him with naught but a thought, would surrender to him, his midnight whims. And you were his. All his. 

You gaze up at your paramour, your innocent doe eyes meeting his, swirling oilpits. His thumb still along your lips. You opened your mouth slightly, allowing his thumb to slide into your mouth, where you bit down lightly, his thumb now caught between your teeth.

No, he thought, you weren't innocent at all. And you weren't to be trusted.

But then again, neither was he.