#bff memoir book

[kkoehn17]

January & February Favorites

The first favorites post of 2024, cute! I’m really trying to focus in on who I am at this very moment because every December I forget who January/February Kim was and feel like she surely existed years earlier. But alas, here I am, here we are, the January/February versions of ourselves, guiding us through the beginning of the year, doing our very best. Let’s get into it. . Books I heard so…

[deadpresidents]

Just to add to that last post about the Personal Memoirs of Ulysses S. Grant, I also want to note that Grant's Civil War BFF, General William Tecumseh Sherman, also wrote a really good, very readable autobiography. Much like Grant's Memoirs, the Memoirs of General William Tecumseh Sherman (BOOK | KINDLE) are much less formal than most things written in the 19th Century and a little more lucid to 21st Century readers. Grant's book is the better of the two, but General Sherman's is definitely worth reading if you're a Civil War buff.

[cuartist]

Just finished reading my graphic novels from the library…. Did not intent to pick two books with queer protagonists (grabbed the ojja wojja from a pride stand tho)

I really enjoyed both though. Graphic novels are truly my bestie.

Anyway quick pitches on both of them bc I want to talk abt them:

The Ojja Wojja a horror mystery or whatever: largely narrated by an autistic 8th grade girl who loves fantasy and sci-fi and fiction and her queer bff and they accidentally/on purpose summon a demon and deal w the repercussions. It’s age 10+ so was very light and fun. Sooo good.

Look Again: a memoir about the time the author found a dead body while walking her dogs & unraveling the trauma that came from that and doing a little exploration with art. Covers heavy subjects but wasn’t super dark.

I checked these out yesterday and have finished both already I love. Comics. Also both are published within the last couple years.

Next on my list: book I bought at the queer book fair, also to see if I can borrow the other one I was considering buying from Rowan since they have it

[musingsofabookworm1]

Catching Up: Part 2

During this span, I returned books to the library that I didn't have time to read. I've never done that. Ever. Dark literary days. But better days head hopefully! Here are November and December's reads:

*The Oracle of Maracoor: Another Day #2 by Gregory Maguire: 4 stars The second in the series following Elphaba's (Wicked) granddaughter. This is a series which will require a read of the first book prior to this one. Both are short, and if you enjoy the Wicked Chronicles, I highly recommend it.

*Mecury Pictures Presents by Anthony Marra: 3 stars I waited so long for this book as I absolutely loved Constellation of Vital Phenomenon, but this one just didn't do it for me like that one did. It follows Italian-born Maria who comes to America in the 1940s in hopes of hittting it big in Hollywood. There's more to it than that, obviously, but that's the bare bones. If you've not read ...Phenomenon, you need to.

*The VanderBeekers on the Road by Karina Yan Glaser: 4 stras Book six, but not the last (as expected), of Glaser's middle grade series. It picks up right where its predecessor left off with its lovable characters. Get the middle grader in your life into these books!

*The Light We Carry: Overcoming in Uncertain Times by Michelle Obama: 5 stars Just read this book. It's amazing. Also recommended: buying and sharing with your BFF -- it heigthens the enjoyability.

*Mad Honey by Jodi Picoult and Jennifer Finney Boylan: 5 stars I thought I was "outgrowing" Picoult's work. But this one brought me back to saying I'm a fan. Picoult brings back characters from previoius works writing from the perpective of Olivia whose son is accused of murdering his girlfiend Lily (Boylan writes Lily's chapters). The two authors put out a hell of a product! Two thumbs way up for this one.

*The Killing Code by Ellie Marney: 3 stars WWII YA compared to Kate Quinn. Not quite, reviewer. You can find better WWII YA than this one. It had some good parts, but average overall.

*We Spread by Iain Reid: 3 stars This has Reid's usual werid vibe, but I didn't like it as much as his others. Protagonist Penny finds herself in a nursing home of sorts that her now-decesased partner signed her up for prior to his death.

*Skipping Christmas by John Grisham: 3 stars Sometimes you read a book because it's your BFF's favorite even though you both know you probably won't love it. But it took minimal time to read, and it did have its highlights.

*Poster Girl by Veronica Roth: 3 stars Said girl is Sonya who lives in a society in which the Delegation has set up a moral code that landed her in prison, but after 10 years, an enemy fromt he past offers her a deal in exchange for her freedom.

*Anywhere You Run by Wanda M. Morris: 5 stars A snow day read! And an excellent one at that! After the murder of a white man in 1960s Mississippi, two black sisters disappear from town in hopes of escaping the secrets they left behind.

*Marmee by Sarah Miller: 5 stars Love Little Women? Get your hands on this book. It follows the story through Marmee's journal entries and includes additional insight into this supporting character. Another good one to share with your BFF if you both love the March sisters.

*Truths I Never Told You by Kelly Rimmer: 5 stars This one was $7 for the paperback, and I loved The Things We Cannot Say so forked over the money. This was another snow-day five-star read! It started slow as the plot goes back and forth between a mother in the 1950s and a family close to present-day. About a third of the way through, things picked up, and how all the pieces came together was excellent!

*Dinners with Ruth: A Memoir on the Power of Friendships - by Nina Totenberg: 4 stars My BFF bought this book so we could enjoy reading about RBG. Ruth is sprinkled in for sure. More and moreso as the memoir carries on. I knew nothing of Totenberg other than the fact that she is a journalist. So all new info on her.

*A School for German Brides by Aimie K. Runyan: 3 stars The plot summary tells of how to the protagonists stories meet. But that doesn't actually happen until about three-quarters of the way through this WWII novel. Definite negative on that front. Average overall.

[clunelover]

What BFF had is called pPROM (preterm premature rupture of membranes). I saw her today and she said she made the mistake of googling more about it and found all these “PPROM at 18 weeks and now my baby is happy and healthy!” stories. How horrible. I have now looked (just googled “PPROM 18 weeks”) and so many of those blog posts are in the top results. That’s gotta be like…anti choice propaganda, right? Her doctor told her that of the babies who survive the wait until they’re old enough for labor to be induced, and then the NICU, only 3% go home without catastrophic health problems. But that’s not necessarily the impression I’m getting from cursory googling. Ugh.

This has all been really interesting, like…psychologically. I weirdly happened to be digging into An Exact Replica of A Figment of My Imagination (Elizabeth McCracken’s memoir about having a stillbirth while living abroad in France) right as BFF found out what was happening. You might think I’d have then set it aside because the synergy is too sad, but it’s actually been really helpful. I did briefly think “did I somehow cause this by reading this book” which of course is bizarre. So many things BFF has been saying are direct echos of what I’m reading here (like “if I get pregnant again I won’t tell anyone until I have the baby”). I was at lunch with some other friends and told them about the situation, and one of them who I really like and who has had one miscarriage of her own at maybe 12 weeks, said something like “I just think, about my own miscarriage, thank god - because [something about how something must have been wrong with the baby]” so I just politely said “okay yes that makes sense but just so you know, nothing was wrong with BFF’s baby, they’d just gotten extensive genetic testing results back” …it’s interesting how the urge is SO STRONG to put a “this makes sense” or “it might even be a silver lining” bow on it. BFF just keeps repeating what one of her doctors said to her - “this is just a shitty thing that happened”…blunt but oddly comforting?

Idk there’s no end to the thought here, I’m just continuing to think a lot.

[motherartistsmakingart]

Hey MAMArtist* KELLY CERVANTES!

What are the ages of your child(ren), and where do you live?

Jackson, 11 + Adelaide, would be 8yo but passed away in 2019 days before her fourth birthday + Anessa, 4. We live in Maplewood, NJ.

How do you describe your art practice?

I am an writer and public speaker. I write shorter blog pieces and have published a book. I also speak at events and for various companies across the country.

Who is your artistic crush?

Author, Christie Tate (Group and BFF). She is a brilliant writer who tells it exactly as it is - I've never read such honest and real writing before finding her books. She also happens to be an incredibly generous person who helped me along the way without ever having met me. Bonus - she is also a mom!

What is a superpower Mother+Artists have?

Well, you can always rely on a mother to sh*t done, and that applies to her work as an artist as well. But perhaps even more powerful is our empathy. Never underestimate a mother+artist's ability to love and understand another human's trial and then turn that into relatable art for all to experience and learn from.

You have something exciting coming up! PLEASE SAY MORE ABOUT IT! I just published my first book, Normal Broken: The Grief Companion For When It's Time To Heal But You're Not Sure You Want To, and it is a USA Today bestseller! Following the death of my daughter Adelaide from a neurodegenerative disease just days before her fourth birthday, I felt irrevocably shattered by the loss. I was broken. Through connecting with others and myself through writing I learned that not only is grief not linear, but we all grieve differently. It took me years to want to heal, which was the impetus for writing Normal Broken, because every other grief book I picked up assumed I wanted to heal and I didn't. I thought grief meant letting go of my daughter, or moving on without her. What I would eventually learn is that healing actually meant remembering and moving forward with her. That I would never be the person I was again before she died and that's OK. I would always be broken, but that I could learn to be Normal Broken.

How did motherhood directly, indirectly, oppositionally or integrally influence this project? Having lost my daughter (and a pregnancy at 21 weeks), this book is integrally tied to being a mother. However, it was important to me to write a book that was accessible to people grieving all kinds of loss: be it a physical person, parent, spouse, friend - or grieving a dream, job, or person who is very much alive but no longer in our lives. Grief is grief is grief. Comparing our trials and losses serves no one. So yes, I lost my child and this book wouldn't exist without my daughter - without me being a mother - but that doesn't make my loss greater or less than anyone else's. 

What are you currently reading or listening to that is giving you thoughts, feelings and reactions?

I am currently reading Meghan Riordan Jarvis' End of The Hour, which is a stunningly beautiful memoir, and I am listening to Grief is Love by Marisa Renee Lee, which is exposing me to the ways culture and race can impact the way we grieve. So... lots of grief books, but mostly memoirs because I love learning as much as I can about the human experience.

Any message for Mother+Artists reading this?

I read something recently that spoke to how women often think that if they are able to accomplish something then it must have been easy. GIVE YOURSELF CREDIT FOR ALL YOU DO! Surviving as an artist is not easy, motherhood certainly isn't easy - combine the two of them and we should all be celebrating every achievement, no matter the perceived size, along the way. Take a dance break, pop the bubbly, announce it on social media, whatever you need to do to acknowledge and celebrate you! Because whatever it is you've done, it definitely wasn't easy.

BEST LINKS to find you and your work!

www.kellycervantes.com IG and Facebook: @kellygc411 Normal Broken is available everywhere books are sold! 

Photo credits: Top Row: Author photo by Justin Patterson Bottom Row: Kelly & Adelaide, photo by Jennifer Loomis; Book cover, Benbella Publishing

*Each month The MAMAs features a Mother+Artist and their work in the world. Thank you Kelly!

[sesame-sim]

I'm now at Sim Year 50 in my save! Major milestone. Time to take a moment and see where we're at in each book that I'm playing.

BOOK - Wild Game by Adrienne Brodeur (nonfic, memoir)

QUICK SYNOPSIS - The author Adrienne recounts how when she was a teenager, her mother Malabar not only had her keep Malabar's affair with her husband Charles's BFF a secret, but also enlisted Adrienne's help with setting up secret rendezvous. Yikes.

HOW FAR ARE WE? - I started playing this one in Jan. 2021. Have played 10 sim years which are 1917-1926 in the book's time.

Nowhere near the main events yet. All the major players are still either children or not born yet.

3 PEEKS INTO THE NEXT DECADE:

Adrienne's father (Paul) and Adrienne's mother (Malabar) will both be born

Charles will get a new baby sibling

we'll see what Ben and Charles look like as teens

[weirdlittleberry]

I still need to get The Office BFFS and I had no idea Ellie wrote a book is it like a memoir?

It's an autobiographical comedy book she published in 2018! My squirrel days

The Office BFFs is really great and nicely printed (even though the dust jacket can be easily damaged). I got a copy for me and a copy for my actual Office BFFs (as in my real life friend of over a decade who is also a super fan) and mine is kinda damaged on the edges

[thoodleoo]

i love making fun of cicero for the sheer number of books/poems he wrote about his own life but i have to admit that this description of his greek memoir on his own consulship that he sent to his bff atticus is one of the most charming descriptions of intertextuality that i've ever seen

[the-forest-library]

July 2022 Reads

Acts of Violet - Margarita Montimore

A Lady’s Guide to Fortune Hunting - Sophie Irwin

Husband Material - Alexis Hall

An Ocean of Minutes - Thea Lim

Mr. Malcom’s List - Suzanne Allain

The Charmed List - Julie Abe

A Thousand Miles - Bridget Morrissey

Nora Goes Off Script - Annabel Monaghan

How to Fake It in Hollywood - Ava Wilder

Float Plan - Trish Doller

Maybe in Another Life - Taylor Jenkins Reid

I Kissed Shara Wheeler - Casey McQuiston

Katzenjammer - Francesca Zappia

Wolf Star - Tanith Lee

Skyhunter - Marie Lu

The Dragon on Ynys - Minerva Cerridwen

A Mirror Mended - Alex E. Harrow

Across the Green Grass Fields - Seanan McGuire

This Woven Kingdom - Tahereh Mafi

Managing Expectations - Minnie Driver

The Storyteller - Dave Grohl

Miss Memory Lane - Colton Haynes

Love That Story - Johnathan Van Ness

Radical Love - Zachary Levi

The Office BFFs - Jenna Fischer and Angela Kinsey

Amazing Facts about Baby Animals - Maja Safstrom

The Illustrated Compendium of Amazing Animal Facts - Maja Safstrom

Animals of a Bygone Era - Maja Safstrom

Dancing at the Pity Party - Tyler Feder

King-Cat Comics and Stories #77 - John Porcellino

The New Yorker Book of Literary Cartoons - Robert Mankoff

What My Bones Know - Stephanie Foo

Between Two Kingdoms - Suleika Jaouad

What Happened to You? - Bruce D. Perry and Oprah Winfrey

Think Again - Adam M. Grant

Four Thousand Weeks - Oliver Burkeman

Tired as F*ck - Caroline Dooner

Craftfulness - Rosemary Davidson

The Mind-Body Stress Reset - Rebekkah LaDyne

The More or Less Definitive Guide to Self Care - Anna Borges

Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents - Lindsay C. Gibson

Bold = Highly Recommend Italics = Worth It Crossed out = Nope

Thoughts:

We seem to be in a golden era of health and trauma memoirs, and I am so grateful. What My Bones Know is an absolutely stunning story or resilience and healing that gave me so much hope. This one immediately goes to the top of my 2022 reads and is an all-time favorite memoir. 

Goodreads Goal: 233/250 

2017 Reads | 2018 Reads | 2019 Reads | 2020 Reads | 2021 Reads | 

2022 Reads

[sinagrace]

Hi Everyone-

I wanted to let you know about my new one-shot at Image Comics called Rockstar and Softboy. It’s a wild book that is inspired by my friendship with comic writer Josh Trujillo, and came from us bonding extra hard competing in the DC Comics Round Robin competition last year. What started as me wanting to make lemonade out of of losing a contest and celebrating a strengthened friendship became so much more.

The story follows two best friends and them planning a party in a world where witches coexist with zombies who coexist with faeries who coexist with vampires. The friendship is put to the test when an ancient myth known only as The Party Animal shows up at their event and causes a mess that dredges up old dirt between two besties. This sounds like nonsense, yet Rockstar and Softboy is actually the most personal and vulnerable story I’ve told in a long time (and this is coming from the guy who started a memoir with him naked in the shower praying for his grandmother’s life).

This is an earnest plea to place a pre-order with your local comic shop before the Final Order Cut-off on Monday 1/17. I have no clue what the marketplace is like for 64 page one-shots, never mind one-shots about gay bff that’s like Romy and Michele’s High School Reunion on Scott Pilgrim-laced amphetamine. Your direct support can make all the difference between this being something that makes me incredibly happy, and something that makes Image Comics proud to have me in their roster of creatives. Given the paper shortage we’re dealing with, Image is not doing second printings… so I really only get ONE shot with this book :-O You can use the handy dandy image I included at the top of this note!

Also, for retailers seeing this: I will be sending out signed bookplates to any shop that orders five or more copies. I’ll match your order with bookplates. This is my only solution to not being able to tour under current conditions :( Please send me a screengrab or some other proof of ordering after FOC to sinagracewebsite (at) gmail dot com.

Thanks so much for reading and spreading the word!

-Sina

[goatskickin]

📅 and 📖 ?

📅 Your birthday:

March 11! It’s coming up.

For the curious I’m a Pisces sun, Capricorn moon, Aries rising.

Someone once told I’m a “drill instructor yoga instructor”, and that made me laugh really hard, as that’s very accurate.

📖 fave book :

This was hard to answer. I’m going to offer some books I’d recommend from my recent reads

Non-fiction:

The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk

- amazing reader-friendly deep dive into research about trauma and its effect on the body

Lab Girl by Hope Jahren

- memoir of a scientist, but also a loving account of the author’s friendship with her lab partner and bff Bill

Fiction:

The Stars are Legion by Kameron Hurley

- I love some good lady sci-fi (this one is in space!). This is a book I’ve read 3 times and would read again tomorrow. Somehow heartbreaking, viscerally disgusting and funny?

Who Fears Death by Nnedi Okorafor

- This ruined all books for me for over a month. I could not pick up another book, as my mind was still reeling from this one. More lady sci-fi, afrofuturist.

[lgbt-ya]

Recent wlw reads 

Mudlarking by Lara Maiklem - A non-fiction memoir about mudlarking, by an English queer woman. Lots of historical detail and amazing anecdotes.

Mooncakes by Suzanne Walker and Wendy Xu - A fun and sweet graphic novel about a family of witches with gay grandmothers, a scientist BFF, a non-binary werewolf and a hearing impaired lead. So fun and feel-good.

The Animals at Lockwood Manor by Jane Healey* - AMAZING. I read this in one day, totally immersed in the lives of these women. The mansion is so clearly drawn, with all these stuffed animals in each room. Haunting, romantic and intriguing, I'm going to be reading more by this author.

Moontangled (The Harwood Spellbook series) by Stephanie Burgis* -  I love this novella series. It's so carefully thought out, with a really interesting take on gender roles in society. I'm a sucker for historical recency magic books, and I've read most of the ones I have found - this is a highlight for me as one of the nicest.

Wilder Girls by Rory Power - Wonderful. Creeping horror that gets worse and worse as the book goes on, with some really gruesome scenes. Richly drawn characters on a mutated island. This is ANNIHILATION for the YA crowd.

Girl, Woman, Other by Bernardine Evaristo -  A powerful look at the lives of queer and WOC in Britain, of all generations. The voice in this is so strong, it's practically a masterclass in writing. 

Down Among the Sticks and Bones (Wayward Children series) by Seanan McGuire* - I love this novella series! Diverse and witty, with unique and memorable characters. Each novella is wonderfully different, and they all feel like fun little excursions into this endless magical world. Highly recommended. The first book has an asexual lead, and this one has a lesbian lead.

Crowded Vol. 1 & 2 by Christopher Sebela -  A graphic novel series about a crowdfunded assassination target running for her life with her hired bodyguard, and getting into lots of trouble along the way

The Order of the Pure Moon Reflected in Water by Zen Cho* -  A fun, diverse novella about a group of bandits whose group is uprooted by the arrival of a new member, a chaotic and argumentative nun of the Order of the Pure Moon. She pesters the bandits and disturbs their carefully planned heists, and has a lot of fun along the way. Zen's writing is so full of life and humour, and the romance here creeps up on you quietly, then hits you hard. I want a sequel! Tet Sang is a wonderfully dry and interesting protagonist.

* gifted by the publisher in exchange for an honest review

[marinaomi]

Excerpt from I Thought YOU Hated ME . . . . . #comics #comix #graphicmemoir #memoir #art #book #art🎨 #artist #artistsoninstagram #illustration #illustrator #illustratorlife #illustratorsofinstagram #illustratorsoninstagram #friends #friendship #bffs #bff

[ifjanetranit]

I read a book! I think I’ve established my love of a good celebrity memoir, and Val Kilmer’s is top notch. 😚 It’s full of Love and his poetry, and it’s kooky and honest. He name drops like crazy, but he isn’t nasty or indiscreet. I mean, Cher has been his BFF since the 80’s. He was buds with Marlon Brando! It doesn’t get much better than that. Val had a reputation for being difficult late in his career, but mostly he comes off as a true artist, and those folks are sometimes a challenge. He addresses his throat cancer, and his recent bizarre reputation. He’s an eccentric storyteller, and I found his life story incredibly absorbing. He dated Mare Winningham in high school, and she narrates some of the audiobook if that tells you anything. I’m Your Huckleberry is wonderful for any Gen X’er who wants a fun and thoughtful read. I give it 20 Hamlet soliloquies. Also rewatch Real Genius, Tombstone, and The Doors again if you get a chance. #ireadabook #valkilmer 
https://www.instagram.com/p/CNaWFUVD2km_pwtQIQc3PE9PrG5SkGrwzXsfCk0/?igshid=1maekwvx5mc4m

[thewestishharpooners]

Okay, this post is a delayed reaction post to @imbellarosa‘s end of the year book post, because I didn’t have my shit together to do anything sooner haha. So, here are some of the books I read and liked in 2020. These are just in the order I read them in, not how much I liked them. 

- Uncanny Valley by Anna Wiener - This is in my favorite genre of book that I call the ‘dystopian tech start up.’ A memoir of her fucking awful time at a tech startup in silicon valley. I also have a dystopian tech start up in my history, so it really hit for me. 

- You Should See Me In A Crown by Leah Johnson - a queer YA prom story about a Black girl in Indiana. Very sweet, very joyful, very lovely. 

- A Beautifully Foolish Endeavor by Hank Green - The rare second book in a series that is better than the first one. Both are extremely weird, and that is a compliment. The audio is really good! 

- Glitter Up the Dark by Sasha Geffen - This non-fiction book explores gender in popular music. It was so, so good. 

- Watch Over Me by Nina Lacour - Nina is my girl. This ghost story is etherial and sort of literary for YA. I loved it. 

- Hello Girls by Emily Henry and Brittany Cavallero - Just a love letter to teen girl friendship, and the lengths you’ll go to for your BFF. Super quick paced plot, great dialogue. I love both of these authors very, very much. 

- Plain Bad Heroines by Emily M Dansforth - This book has like, everything in it. Queer girls, modern and historical parallel storylines, a boarding school, the filming of a horror movie, a very important red book. Yellow Jackets. If you’ve been struggling to find a novel that will hook you, maybe this one will do the trick.