#but I find constantly seeing posts about war and death very upsetting and bad for my mental health

[betty-bourgeoisie]

If people could tag their posts about the Israel-Palestine conflict that would be very appreciated

[edbloves]

https://www.tumblr.com/edbloves/754938770487476224/consumed-by-thoughts-of-post-war-bucky-and-buck

Is there any chance we can have more of this 🥹🥹

Hi Anon!!

You absolutely can, let's see if I can cook something up for you, darling! These have been the head cannons bouncing around in my head the last few days so here you go:

After doing a little bit of math, I've decided that John's daughter would be around three (for pregnancy, stalag and post-war timing reasons)

John honestly doesn't remember her mother, and feels horribly guilty for it. He has vague memories of a drunken night in the Bristish bars with a Red Cross girl where both of them were mutually using the other to try to forget the war, but he knows nothing about her and barely remembers what she looks like. And to be honest, there were numerous instances of those, with numerous women

John, being the more charismatic of the two, relates better to her, though he is petrified that he's going to mess up and screw up her life (i.e. he's very aware that he drinks too much and smokes too much)

Gale is more nervous around her, never grew up with siblings and never knew anyone with kids her age and is terrified he's going to disappoint her or unknowingly start acting like his father. But once she starts to get more comfortable with them, he realizes that she's just a mini John and he falls even more in love with her

She LOVES Meatball (whom Demarco gave to Buck because Florida is not the place for a husky) and Meatball loves her back, they spend evenings with Meatball curled around her small frame and her tiny hands scrunched in his fur. Honestly, he's kind of like a therapy dog/emotional support animal for her after her mother's death and transition into John and Gale's life

All three of them get nightmares, John and Gale's about the war and her's about her mother dying, and later, about Buck and Bucky dying so it isn't uncommon for them to be up in the middle of the night all together

On that note, Gale keeps the fridge stocked with each other their favourite ice cream flavours (vanilla for him, chocolate for her and Bucky) and on warm nights where the nightmares wake them up, they'll all pile into the truck in their pyjamas and head out where there are views of the whole city and they'll curl up in the bed of the truck wrapped up and snuggled in blankets with Buck pointing out constellations and Bucky explaining that the sky is where he and Buck used fly

When she calls Bucky Daddy for the first time, he's calm about it with her but he completely loses it afterwards to Gale, emotionally overwhelmed and touched by her trust and love

On her second night with them, Gale is awake in the middle of the night thinking and spiralling and trying make mental tallies of all the things he has to do and learn and help her with and holy shit he's so unprepared and what are they going to do with a child, let alone a girl?? So he climbs out of bed and unthinking of the late hour, phones Marge and asks her how she does her hair. And lovely Marge is like WTF Gale? So Gale explains, says Bucky has a kid so I guess I have a kid now, too.

She has them instantaneously wrapped around her finger and they literally struggle so hard to say no to her ("You tell her she can't do that, John." "Why me? You tell her!" "I don't want her to be upset with me!" "You think I do?!") Good cop, bad cop is literally impossible to do with them, and Gale can't stomach it anyways, not with how his father was

They overload her with toys and clothes and sweets, particularly Gale, trying to come out from underneath the shadow of his own father and frets constantly that she doesn't know they love her

John is the one typically taking her out to do lots of activities, he signs her up for ballet and teaches her baseball as she grows up, puts her on the horses and on a bike probably too-early but Gale can't find it in himself to complain when John's smile is plastered all over her little face

Gale takes her with him EVERYWHERE, and not in the way his Dad took him (like it was a forced thing, like he was a nuisance he had to look after) but because Gale literally just wants to spend time with her all the time. He enjoys talking to her and getting her books to read as she learns her ABCs and hearing her three-year-old (sometimes strange) opinions on things, and having her accompany him to the grocery store and the post-office

Marge begs to babysit and she has to be damn convincing to get them to give her their daughter for a night

That's all I got for now! Hope you enjoy :) We'll see if I come up with more, then I might make it into a multi chapter fic if enough people are interested!

[phoenixyfriend]

Re; Ahsoka and Quinlan being the same age, now I'm picturing Ahsoka, Quinlan, and Rex eventually ending up in a weird sorta thruple where Quinlan comes in and out of the relationship but the door is kinda always open for him? And Rex spends a lot of mornings eyeing the tangle of orange and brown skin on the other side of the bed like he has no idea how he ended up here but he's (mostly) okay with that tbh

Context: Commander Buir in chronological order

YES okay so this is wild to me that people are invested in this but like half the time-travel fics with Ahsoka in the same age-group as Quinlan have me wondering if I should ship them. Let me just. Ho shit.

So, okay, I've explored a lot of possible dynamics but there's something really engaging about how Quinlan, trained as a Shadow before the Sith came back, could react to a War Padawan. Ahsoka isn't really infiltration material yet, she's very much a frontline fighter, but she's got a lot more experience with a kind of consistent dark atmosphere that most Jedi don't. They get exposed to plenty of dark stuff, sure, but not the kind of all-encompassing "this is my life for the last two years" thing that is usually reserved for the long-term field agents like Shadows and Watchmen.

The War Padawans, for all that they were supposed to be just normal Jedi Padawans, were living in the kind of consistently negative environment that's normally experienced by those Knighted Sentinels.

So Ahsoka, while still generally pretty young in these AUs, is a very odd kind of person to be around, because she's spunky and vivacious and snippy and affectionate and snarky and knows how to break every bone in your body from harrowing experience as the only thing standing between death and thousands of brothers.

And Quinlan, I imagine, really likes that about her. She gets it, and she's still an energetic and loving and trying to do her best to be a good person despite everything. He gravitates towards her and she... well, she's not blind. She can tell he's interested. And she's not upset about that.

ANYWAY, ONTO REX

So, Rex is... technically twelve. He hasn't exactly got a whole lot of experience with romance. He is also, up until the point of time-travel, legal property of the Senate and the Jedi Order, which means that Ahsoka, or at least her community, owns him. He was indoctrinated to serve her and that community. She also outranks him, for all that she usually lets him take the lead in the field due to experience. He's older than her physically and maturity-wise, but she's also had a grow-up-faster-than-you-should adolescence, and she has superpowers.

What I'm saying is, the power dynamic is fucked up.

(Unironically I spent hours last night realizing that it balances out a lot more than C*dywan does, which I'm censoring because by god do I not want discourse on this post. I like both ships, and don't want to argue about what's the most problematic. It's Star Wars. The only unproblematic ships are Bail/Breha and Owen/Beru.)

Here's the thing, though, because the main thing people seem to argue here is the age/maturity difference as a problem area:

The age difference in actual time is four years, which is smaller than the two main ships of the franchise (Han/Leia and Padme/Anakin, to be clear). The age difference in maturity is ??? We'll say that the clones started aging normally after they hit twenty, so the age difference in maturity is six years... which is still normal for SW ships.

(This is why I don't have any issues with the ship in a post-O66 context, once they've had a few years to move past the traumas and whatnot. The age stuff all evens out with time, they're a good team, and neither was grooming the other. It's not objectively any more problematic than most SW ships at that point, and I'm okay with that. They deserve to be happy if they want.)

But they get yanked away from all that structure of who owns what, who reports where, who has which rank, who's legally a person in the eyes of the Republic when they end up on Dagobah. Once they've registered when they are, the only remaining complications are:

He grew up in a cultlike environment and was indoctrinated to serve her (but has been replacing that indoctrination with genuine respect and affection for her as a person because they've worked together for two years).

She has superpowers (contextually not a big problem: we see several Force-Sensitive/Non-Sensitive ships that don't consider those powers a complicating element)

He's several years younger than her (canonically less of an issue than it could be: Cut got married and has kids) and has next to no experience with what a normal romance looks like except for hanging out on the edges of whatever the fuck his General has going on with the Senator

She's several years less mature than he is (...something of an issue)

So a lot of this is mostly okay. She feels weird about the fact that she's got more knowledge of romance and all that it entails. He feels weird about the fact that, despite her being older, he looks at her and sees someone that's still a little young, not quite a shiny. Except she is older than him, and he's seen her behead four people in a single move, and they've saved each other's lives more times than either of them can count anymore. He respects her, and the fact that she's babyfaced doesn't change the fact that, in terms of who they are as people and warriors, they're on a level playing field.

She still looks at him and mourns his lost childhood, and he still looks at her and takes a moment to see past the too-big eyes and adolescent proportions.

But they really, really care about each other, and maybe part of them is starting to recognize that there's a bit of a crush before they time-travel, but neither one wants to make a move. There's a lot of baggage on both sides, a lot of "but they're a child" and "but they're (literally vs functionally) below me in the chain of command, I can't take advantage of that" and all that fun stuff. It's the kind of situation where two people circle each other for ages without making a move, because actually making that move is terrifying on account of not knowing whether the other party knows they can say no, on top of the usual "what if it ruins our friendship?" thing.

What happens on Dagobah, though... is very tropey. They're sort of stranded until Ahsoka can fix the ship, and that takes time. The area is also very heavy with the Force, dense and heady with the energy it carries, and it's... actually really not great for Ahsoka. She keeps feeling like she's back on Mortis, and has nightmares from the trigger there, but also keeps hallucinating because she wasn't ready for the thickness of the energy (like Yoda) or still new enough to the Force that she couldn't feel how dense it all was (like Luke). She can't work on the engines as constantly as she'd like to get them out of there, and while Rex is a competent mechanic, he's not as skilled with it as the girl who jumped headfirst into lessons with Anakin.

Rex spends a lot of time holding Ahsoka and wiping her brow with a wet cloth while she's feverish and out of it. Yes we're going full Florence Nightingale romance here, let me have my fun.

They get the communications relay working earlier than the engine, find out the year is wrong, panic a bit. All is well. (It's not, but they're holding it together for now.)

Ahsoka keeps working on the engine when she's lucid. Rex keeps hunting up game and edible plants for them while she does. They cuddle at night, because it's not cold but it is empty of the people they care about, and they kind of want that reassurance of someone they trust and love at their back.

(Morai visits.)

(Daughter shows up in the nightmares, tells Ahsoka that age will not come for her beloved until the time is natural for it. The phrasing is dumb but she does manage to convey that the accelerated aging is no longer an issue, if it even was after they hit adulthood. Ahsoka is relieved.)

And, you know, emotions happen. She takes his hand while they're leaning up against each other. He kisses her forehead while she's having a bad spell. They cook together and tell jokes to keep sane and spar. They hug each other through nightmares and panic attacks. There is much blushing. There is much cuddling.

Once, they kiss.

They break apart, flushing and stammering and being very awkward about the whole thing, and make excuses to leave and panic about the fact that they!! Kissed!!!!!

A couple hours later they find each other again, and have a long and complicated discussion about why they like each other (war makes bedfellows, there's trust and affection and all that fun stuff) and why they're hesitant (age stuff, maturity stuff, prior indoctrination), and make the decision to take it slow. They cuddle, and kiss, and blush a lot because both of them are basically just dumb teens having their first real relationship.

They eventually leave the planet, make it to Coruscant, etc. It takes a bit for anyone except Obi-Wan to realize that something's changed between them. Most people didn't know them before, and Anakin's observation skills are currently at a very low ebb. But they sit together and hold hands, and flirt when they spar, and once or twice people find them kissing (both standard and Keldabe) in a corner while holding hands and then just smiling at each other like loons.

They end up rooming together because nobody has the heart to separate them after hearing about all the war stuff. Like yes attachment's bad, but these two do seem to understand loss of loved ones and recognize that they could lose each other at any time and death is natural and they won't lose their entire shit about it, and if even General Kenobi is anxious as hell about being separated from the people he fought side-by-side with for two years, then maybe it's just... really normal for those two to want each other's company, and everyone can just turn a blind eye to the romance happening.

They share a bed, but they only ever sleep in it. Like, there's some goodnight kisses and cuddles, but everything is very G-rated until they've had time to settle into being true equals instead of just the "well, I guess the power dynamics balance out? Maybe?" of before.

And just... yeah. Rex does not believe that he's in this good of a position whenever he has the time to think about it. He's got a girlfriend! A really pretty, smart, strong, skilled one! Who thinks he's a cool dude! How the fuck did a clone like him manage that? He wasn't even legally a person a year ago, how did he end up in bed with one of the most amazing people he's ever met? He spends multiple nights just staring at her while he tries to fall asleep, asking himself how he got here and just like... marveling at her. She's worth marveling at. He's in love and she's amazing and he has no idea how to handle it at all.

...yeah no I have a lot of feelings now.

[urupotter]

So while I've said before that I don't like the HP subreddit, I still frequent it because occasionally I read something insightful. This is one such case, where I read a reading of Lupin that I'd never seen before in response to a comment of mine analyzing the shrieking shack confrontation between Snape, Remus, Sirius and the golden trio, where I mentioned that Lupin was a gaslighter so I wanted to share. It was created by reddit user u/UsuallySiSometimesNo and is posted here with his permission. We had a little conversation in the comments. Read it under the cut

UsuallySiSometimesNo: That struck a cord with me, too. I didn't think about that on a conscious level before, but when I read it, it felt instantly true.

Honestly, I think the strongest examples of Lupin gaslighting are actually done to himself. The biggest, character-defining example, I think, is that after finding friendship with James, Sirius, and Peter, he becomes so desperate not to be ostracized from them (due to his issues of self-worth and his personal brand of impostor syndrome) that he deliberately and routinely feeds himself false narratives about their behavior until he can no longer tell fact from fiction, even as he's experiencing it.

Their relentless bullying of Snape? A childhood rivalry.

Their casual bullying of other students? Kids being young and stupid.

Their clear disinterest verging on contempt for Peter, someone less fortunate and vulnerable with whom they're supposed to be good friends? Just mates being mates.

Even actions taken against Lupin, himself, are revised in his memory to be 'no big deal', because he desperately needs that to be true. Let's pretend for a moment that Snape indisputably deserved to be slaughtered by a werewolf the night Sirius told him how to get past the Whomping Willow. Sirius did not send Snape to be killed by any old werewolf. What happened that night was that Sirius - one of Remus' best friends, if not his actual best friend - attempted to use Remus' curse/illness against someone (which is a big enough betrayal on it's own) without ever telling Remus that when he woke up in the morning (covered in blood and in the presence of a shredded corpse) it would be to find that he had committed the act he was most petrified he might one day commit. In setting Snape up to be killed by Lupin, Sirius, at the very least, risked Lupin's sanity, and, at the very most, risked Lupin being sentenced to death.

Now, I understand that Sirius wasn't thinking about all of that when he did what he did, and I, as a someone removed from the situation (and armed with the additional character/situational knowledge granted to a reader) can even understand why Sirius' own trauma led him to grant such a blind death sentence to Snape (which I think is related to a point you made elsewhere, u/Adventure_Time_Snail, about Sirius' "violence towards those who trigger his fundamental fear of wizard fascists" because of his abusive upbringing). But Lupin's perspective is not one of an unbiased observer. And once James found out what was happening and pulled Snape back before it was too late (which, I would think, was more to save Lupin than to save Snape) and once Remus awoke the next to day to discover everything that transpired the night before, I find it hard to believe there wasn't at least some conversation about the true gravity of the situation. And yet, even all these years later, Lupin doesn't bat an eye when Sirius not only doesn't display shame when the event is mentioned in POA, but offers something akin to regret, NOT at the fact that his actions could have gotten Lupin killed, but that that they DIDN'T get Snape killed: "It served him right...", he sneered. etc. etc.

I think the obvious question here, is 'Even disregarding what Sirius did to Snape - how can Lupin be okay with the knowledge that Sirius has no regret, at all, for what he did to him, even now that they're adults?' Well, we're not in Lupin's point of view in the books, which means we can't hear his internal monologue, but I think a satisfactory answer to the question is that he's done a substantial amount of internal gymnastics in order to get to a point where he doesn't see this as a big deal, or even as something that he has a right to be upset about.... just like a gaslighter does to their victim.

Again, because we're not in Lupin's POV, we can't point to the exact instances that such internal gaslighting took place, but, based on what we do observe from Harry's POV (and based on external knowledge of gaslighting as a true-to-life concept) I wouldn't be surprised if Lupin so desperately needs everything to be okay that he derides himself for feeling bad or betrayed, that he calls himself stupid for thinking terrible things that have happened to him are a big deal, that he wars with himself about how people who are his friends and who are so good to him and who are better friends than he thinks he deserves could possibly do something to harm him/others, and that he beats down whatever emotions and senses and gut feelings he has that tells him something his friends have done might be very wrong. What we see in the books is a man who makes excuses for his friends and harbors a warped perception of reality in much the same way victims of gaslighting do, and he seems to exploit his own insecurities in order to instill doubt in his own experiences in much the same way perpetrators of gaslighting do.

I can't help but think that, by the time Lupin tells Harry that Snape harbors a particularly strong hatred for James because James was a better Quidditch player, Lupin has become so adept at gaslighting himself that he actually believes it.

tl;dr: One of Lupin's defining characteristics is that he gaslights himself out of a desperate need to be liked by others, since he has a difficult time liking himself and seems to believe all of his relationships are incredibly fragile.

Urupotter:

This is a fascinating reading on Lupin that I've never seen. I don't read him the same way, in that I think Lupin actually does know that what he's doing is wrong, he just doesn't have the moral courage to act on his conscience. (I view him as the anti Snape, great conscience, but abysmal moral courage, while Snape had unbelievable moral courage but a shitty conscience. Their arcs are about growing their moral courage and their conscience respectively) Realizing that his negligence almost got Harry killed is what triggers his arc, concluding when he goes back to Tonks and Teddy after running away, taking responsibility for his actions for the first time.

But this reading is so interesting that I'll have to reflect on it. Do you mind if I post it on my Harry Potter tumblr blog? I'll credit you of course, I would just like to discuss it with my followers. Of course if you don't want to I won't.

UsuallySiSometimesNo:

Honestly, I think the lack of in-depth conversation about Remus Lupin (at least compared to fan favorites Sirius Black and Severus Snape) is a missed opportunity and a shame. Don't get me wrong, I can discuss Sirius and Snape until blue in the face, but Lupin's arc is just as powerful in an understated (and often underestimated) way. The muddy, oversimplified truth is, without the fatal-flaw decision making of all four Marauders throughout their lives, the series of events proceeding the first chapter of the first book don't happen, and the story we all know and love never comes to be.

And speaking of sparking a discussion about Lupin...

I think Lupin actually does know that what he's doing is wrong, he just doesn't have the moral courage to act on his conscience.

You know what? I agree. And that's what makes him so interesting, I think. He is constantly and dependably full to bursting with internal conflict. When his friends are wrong/do something wrong/say something wrong, he can and does immediately identify the situation as wrong. When he does something wrong, or when he does nothing in the face of something wrong, in that moment I believe he knows the full weight of the situation. Like you said, he has a strong conscience, as well as a deeper, perhaps more nuanced understanding of right and wrong than do, for example, James and Sirius. Now, Lupin needs his friends. They're not just people to hang out with, they're a lifeline for him. He's not going to engage in conflict with them if there is even the slightest chance that he might lose them (for a variety of reasons, he lacks, as you said, the moral courage to do so). But he's also a generally decent human being, and with a strong conscience comes the capacity for sincere guilt and remorse. So, not only will he not confront his friends, he needs it to be okay that he doesn't confront them. And it's at that point that I think the self gaslighting is triggered.

But Lupin is intelligent and nobody's fool, so the gaslighting creates only a thin layer of ice over the problem. Just enough of a cover that he can live with the things he would otherwise deeply regret. I do think he believes the alternative reality he makes for himself to be accurate as long as it isn't really challenged. Crack the ice, though, and we see him express remorse and reveal an underlying awareness of past and present truths. But then the moment is over, and the war between the uncomfortably and full weight of the truth and his need for the companionship of his friends returns, and then the gaslighting begins again, allowing him an easier return to his closest friends (and eventually his closest friend, singular, after the others have been taken from him as was his fear all along) without conflict and with minimal strain on his conscience.

Once Sirius, the last of his original chosen family is gone - truly gone, as opposed to 'located elsewhere' as he was when in prison - following OOtP, suddenly Lupin's arc takes off at a greater speed than at any point prior. He's now literally lost all of the people he'd been terrified of figuratively losing. Although there are still people and things he cares about, he isn't as dependent on any of them as he was on those foundational friendships, and the finality of their absence allows him to finally grow beyond his stifling cycle of reality shifting, confront the truths of his reality and his circumstances, and, as you said, finally take responsibility by returning to Tonks and Teddy - a decision that, ultimately, triggers his death (I don't mean to imply that it was a bad decision or that it's the sole cause of his death, but Rowling has said that being 'out of practice' contributed to his loss at the Battle of Hogwarts, which makes for a fantastic tragedy).

I don't mean to overstate the importance of this theory or imply that it's always present when he's on-stage, and, as with anyone, many other elements, of course, factor into his actions/words/motives. But I think it's a fascinating potential component of his character all the same. If you have more thoughts on this, I love to hear them - and I look forward to reading the discussion on your blog!

So what do you think? Is this a valid reading of Lupin? I'd say it is, but I'm interested in reading my followers thoughts!

[fixielixie]

the double standards annoy me so much, like i'm seeing so many jc stans going on tirades about how terrible wwx, lwj, and wn are for being so ~mean~ over the golden core reveal. but it's okay for jc to scream at wwx about things he didn't do (yunmeng being attacked, his parents being killed, jyl being killed) and insult him all the time? why does jc apparently have a licence to treat everyone like shit but the second someone so much raises their voice at him theyre an unforgiveable monster

because jiang cheng has ✨trauma✨ and anyone who even says something slightly mean to him is a Bully.

like during the whole scene where jiang cheng is screaming and crying about how wwx betrayed him and whatever, the part that made me really emotional was how wwx didnt want to be constantly reminded of the sacrifice he made. he didnt say "lets not mention it" because hes a bully who doesnt care about jiang chengs feelings, he saying it because he doesnt want to be constantly thinking about something that was obviously a horrible experience thats happened now and cant be taken back.

he didnt want to be reminded again and again of what it felt like when his core was cut out or what price he had to pay. is this was exposed in the past, he'd most likely laugh and comfort jiang cheng. 'it's not that big of a deal anyways. look at me all these years. without the core, i still managed to come through, didn't i? beating everyone i wanted to beat, killing everyone i wanted to kill.' but now, he indeed didn't have the strength left to put up such a confident, nonchalant pretense.

literally every post about the golden core transfer/reveal is about how hard and sad it was for jiang cheng, like he couldnt have lived a perfectly content life up until that point if he wasnt so obsessed with hating wei wuxian. and people think he's perfectly within his rights to blame wwx for every little thing that went wrong in his life, and that dying and giving up his core does nothing to repay the endless debts jiang cheng thinks he owes to him and the sect.

no one want jiang cheng begging on his knees for forgiveness, but to at least allow wwx to move on from that time in his life without constantly having it thrown back in his face, most of which he's getting the blame for not being his fault in the first place. the only death you could actually pin on wwx is jin zixuan, and it would be hypocritical of jiang cheng to hold that over wwxs head considering he was very much ready and willing to let him die in the caves during the wen camp.

jiang cheng wasnt even upset over getting the golden core, he was upset because it made him look like an awful person now. that the image of wwx being this uncontrollable monster he had built up in his head to relieve himself of the guilt of hating him had now been shattered. finding out about the golden core transfer basically confirmed every insecurity jiang cheng had about wwx before the war, made worse by the fact that jc had really deluded himself into thinking wwx had betrayed the sect and killed everyone he loved in cold blood.

it really is quiet pitiful of him, but he ended up in this situation due to his own shortcomings and i think he finally realises it now. that wwx was never the one to blame.

and yet somehow fanon has twisted it to be jiang cheng who was the one that was wronged ,,,... like literally how could they read that entire scene and think /jiang cheng/ was the victim in the end. the only thing he was a victim of was his own bad decisions.

[lokiondisneyplus]

Most Marvel post-credit scenes hint at the future. Loki opted for a blunter approach: the God of Mischief would return in season 2.

Based on the final turn of events, there was really no other choice: Loki (Tom Hiddleston), having journeyed to the furthest point in spacetime with his variant Sylvie (Sophia Di Martino) to meet the founder of the TVA, a scientist-turned-survivor-of-multiversal-war known as He Who Remains (Jonathan Majors), finds himself zapped into a new reality when his lady self slays the omnipresent being. The mind reels!

Creator Michael Waldron takes delight in the endless possibilities of Loki’s core premise. And as a veteran of Rick and Morty, he knows what anchors a mind-bending show, and what will keep Hiddleston’s character hurtling through his chaotic, rewritten future. Below, Polygon talks to Waldron about landing on the key choices of Loki season 1, what to expect from season 2, and a bit on his next project, the wrestling drama Heels, which is set to premiere on Aug. 15.

Did you know there’d be a second season of Loki from the beginning or was that choice made later in the process?

Michael Waldron: We always knew that it was a possibility. We always knew that we wanted to propel Loki and these characters out into the MCU after this, into further stories. But that didn’t really crystallize as a sure thing until we were in production and everything. And as we were really figuring out the finale.

So you were still cracking the ending as you shot the show?

There was a hiatus due to the pandemic. So things were constantly being retooled because of that. I think, by and large, everything with He Who Remains and the Sylvie-Loki conflict was always there. But that cliffhanger was the sort of thing that suddenly became a really appealing opportunity, a chance for that to lead into a second season.

What element of the series helped you crack the macro story of Loki, and made all the other pieces fall into place? Each episode almost feels like a standalone adventure, similar to Rick and Morty, but what helped it all click?

The first couple of weeks in the writers room was just laying out the individual episodes. It was very important to me that each episode stood on its own, and you could say “This is the Lamentis episode,” “This is the apocalypse moon episode,” “This is the Void episode.” I didn’t want it to just be cut up chapters and have one long continuous story. Obviously, we had to figure out the time travel for things to slot into place. I think a big idea for us was the way you get around the TVA by hiding in apocalypses. That felt like such a big, cool, exciting idea that it drove the action of episode 2, episode 3, and in a way it’s like Alioth is the ultimate apocalypse that He Who Remains is hiding behind. That sci-fi idea cracked a lot open for us. I know that after we had that I went home and I slept a little sounder.

Did adding the multiverse to the Marvel Cinematic Universe feel like blowing something up or expanding it, in terms of narrative possibilities?

In the same way that after the first couple Iron Man movies, and with the first Avengers, suddenly these movies were kind of going to space. Then we had Guardians. I think of the multiverse as another version of that. It’s new ground to cover, and particularly interesting because characters meeting other versions of themselves and other versions of people they know is... cool. That’s just a cool sci-fi concept! But I think with anything, as you expand outward, it only works if the humanity remains. It’s exciting to watch characters dealing with big crazy multiversal conflicts because we can see ourselves in them. I think you just have to hold on to the humanity that makes these stories work in the first place.

Did you go back to the Thor movies for Loki? Was there anything to find in the past of Marvel as you were paving the future?

Absolutely. I mean I watched them many times, contrary to what Twitter might think because I did some bits on there saying that I’ve never seen Avengers and I upset some people [laughs]. I have seen it many times. “Confirmed: Loki writer has seen Avengers and saw it before writing Loki show.”

In fact, I was watching all these movies on a loop in the writers’ room. I gleaned so much because you watch the evolution of the character. Avengers was particularly informative because our story picks up Loki right after that, but I also I found a lot of inspiration in Thor: The Dark World, a maybe sometimes maligned movie that I actually really enjoy. I just think there’s great stuff with Loki being tangentially responsible for the death of his mother, how he reacts to that. That is the start of his journey of that version of Loki’s redemption, so I was inspired by that.

What’s propelling the characters into season 2? Where are you headed in basic terms?

In season 1, you saw a lot of characters reckoning with and questioning their own glorious purpose, and that glorious purpose changing, [characters] realizing that that can change. Everybody except for Sylvie. I think she holds onto hers, which is vengeance, and to the detriment of us all, perhaps. And we’ve got a Loki who, at the top of our show, assessed himself as a villain and, I would argue, at the end of our show, has become a little bit of a hero. There’s nothing more heroic to me than fighting for the right thing and losing. You see that washing over him as he’s there back at the TVA, after Sylvie has knocked back there. And then he gets up because that is what heroes do — they keep going. So I think that you’re gonna see a Loki that looks at himself in a different way certainly that at the top of this.

Do you hope to explore more of Sylvie’s backstory in season 2?

I guess we’ll see. We certainly have our own rich backstory for her, stuff that didn’t get to make it into the show. Elissa Karasik, our episode 2 writer, wrote a lot of amazing backstory for Sylvia and everything. So those ideas exist out there.

And her version of Thor?

Tune in.

How did He Who Remains come about? Did you bring the character to Marvel or was that a character Marvel hoped to introduce?

I was pushing and our team was pushing early on in the writers’ room that it should be a version of Kang up in that Citadel, sort of fusing the mythology of He Who Remains with a little bit of the Immortus mythology. And that was a thing we were excited to do. And it became clear that it actually made sense for our story. The only way we were going to do it was if it made sense, but it was like, who had a better argument for creating the TVA to prevent other versions of themselves from existing then a guy as evil as Kang the Conqueror?

You wrote the upcoming Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness — did Marvel hire you for that after Loki? Does the movie feel like a continuation of the show?

Yeah, that opportunity came as we were getting ready to start production on Loki. It was a pleasure. I got to work with Sam Raimi, a hero of mine. I was in London for five months making that movie at the top of this year. We had a blast. I think that it’s a continuation in as much as ever every Marvel movie is to some extent a chapter in an ongoing story, but these things are meant to stand alone and the most important thing about Doctor Strange too is making the most kick ass Doctor Strange movie we could.

Is Loki a two-part show now or are you invested in telling a longer story with future seasons beyond season 2?

Time will tell, but I do my hope is that season 1 stands on its own. We always wanted to tell a complete story there. And in whatever the next chapter may be will stand on its own as well.

Your next show, Heels, is already on the way. We got a big preview out of Comic-Con this year, but I’m curious about the scope of this story. You’re starting with two brothers running an independent wrestling franchise, but you’ve dropped the name “Vince McMahon” a few times — is this about the building of an empire? Would you liken it to The Godfather or Breaking Bad?

I always thought about it a little bit of a Scorsese-sort-of rise, and we’ll see if there’s a fall. Starting from humble beginnings and trying to build some crazy. Wrestling was certainly not always the empire that it is and that’s what’s interesting, to watch the evolution of a family-run wrestling business from something you do in your small towns and perhaps a national, even global empire. That would be a really compelling arc for a show over the course of several seasons. I’d be excited to explore that.

What’s the most dramatically fulfilling wrestling moment you’ve witnessed? What’s the bar for the wrestling drama of Heels?

It’s gotta be Hulk Hogan turning heel in the WCW. There was an invasion storyline, these guys from WWF, Kevin Nash and Scott Hall, came over and they were the bad guys. It was at a Pay-per-view and and they were beating up on the good guys that you love, and here comes Hulk Hogan in the yellow and red and he’s the hero. “The Hulk’s gonna get ‘em! The good guy’s here!” And then the Hulk just leg drops Randy Savage. That was the original Red Wedding. I just think about the boldness of turning him heel. To a little kid... I wasn’t even like a massive Hulk fan, but he was just such a mythological figure. What a chance that Hulk Hogan took as a performer, as a bankable kind of movie star at that point. That was bold, risky storytelling and it set off two years of amazing storytelling with Hogan just playing a craven, cowardly heel and just being so evil. I really respect the hell out of them for doing that. That was a great storyline.

[one-real-imonkey]

*sticks head into your askbox* Tell me about your Coruscant Guard AU? 👉👈

Ok, so, the Guard deserve love, and respect, and lots of hugs.

They don’t get nearly enough.

The Guard are extremely isolated from the rest of the GAR. In far to many ways. It’s not just the distance, it’s that they’re never on the front lines.

The rest of the army think they’re paper pushers, that they never see any danger, that they’re weak and cowards.

None of it’s true. Sure they have a lot of paperwork, sure they aren’t fighting the droids, but they deal with all sorts of other threats not to mention the Senators themselves.

They’re constantly dehumanised and abused verbally and physically and threatened, it’s actually worse for them than on any of the front lines. Just in different ways. The few vode who transfer into the Guard are horrified.

No one outside has any idea what their vode go through.

They don’t have a Jedi to go to, they don’t have other units to rely on, they don’t have any escape and they cannot be transferred. All they can do it look after each other and do everything they can to stay alive and keep each other alive.

The GAR think they’re weak for how often they end up in the med bay for one reason or another. They don’t know about the abuse, the beatings they’re not allowed to defend themselves against, they don’t know that Fix made it mandatory to come in after shift if you were tased because the shocks can be bad for the heart (they don’t know the vode in the CG can be tased) they don’t know that the CMO can override when rations are cut so vode can eat. Some of the senators would forget they put the sanction on and not take it off, others didn’t care. It was a loophole, but it saved them from starving to death.

None of the Guard like putting the other vode from the GAR into the drunk tank, in fact at first they try not to, but when their own siblings are the ones yelling abuse at them and throwing things at them and acting out, something in the CG collectively snapped.

If they weren’t going to act like Vode, they weren’t going to be treated like Vode. They weren’t going to be protected the way the Guard have to protect each other.

It ended up being just another divide that isolated them further.

Palpatine planned on it, but he had no idea it would be so effective. He barely even had to use the chips to use members of the Guard to start conflicts or his Sith influence to create an aura of hostility between the Guard and the rest of the GAR. He still does both, of course, but even without that the gaps were forming.

The Sith influence hangs heavy on Coruscant. The clones who are rarely there can barely feel it, same with the Jedi, but the ones under it are weighed down by it without knowing. And it amplifies conflict and splits and divides, sows chaos. Batches are supposed to stick together no matter where they get posted, but the ones in the Guard are almost always cut off and left behind. The Jedi can’t feel it because they’ve been slowly stewing in it for about 700 years.

Because they’re so isolated, cut off from their other vode across the galaxy, they bond even more tightly to one another.

No matter how awful things get, they always have each other. There’s always someone there to give a hug and to listen or talk to. To bandage your wounds and keep the nightmares at bay. Because that’s what siblings do, even if the rest of their siblings have forgotten that and left them behind.

Their culture can differ from the rest of the GAR, not just from isolation but the heavy Coruscant influence. They managed to get ahold of a load of Coruscant reality TV and baking shows and all sorts, they use common phrases that the other clones don’t know because they aren’t exposed to it. That and slang including the teenager slang and memes and jokes.

The first time a group of teens heading home from school overheard a couple of clones making jokes using a meme while on patrol they choked on laughs and one fell of the curb.

They’re also willing to mangle the jokes to make kids laugh, teens too, sometimes. They help out on the lower levels with childcare and youth centres and even some of the nurseries and schools as volunteers, and helping the kids when they’re scared or upset or need it is their pleasure. The kids love them too, because they play and have fun in a way a lot of grownups don’t. (And I’m sure that has nothing to do with their being 8-14 and children at heart even if they were forced to grow up at twice the age and be soldiers. Nothing at all.) People are grateful for them.

In fact they’re actually building a defence on the lower levels, a group of people who are starting to value at the very least the Guard and loathe every new bruise they have. A lot of these people feel abandoned by the Senate and upper classes, the same people they know are abusing and enslaving the CG. A lot of these people are Freed former slaves, more than a few know what abuse looks like. They can’t do much to help the Guard, but they do what they can. It’s greatly appreciated.

The vode hold singing competitions in the barracks, every single one of them had to learn how to dance, for duty and for fun. Not disco dancing but formal. In case they’re asked for a gala instead of being asked to stand motionless against the wall like ornaments. Or just to take the piss of senators in their free time.

They manage to get the things they need to bake and sew and find creative outlets. They read and watch movies and play sports. There are upsides to being grounded.

They have dancing competitions and singing competitions of their own, pools for contestants as everyone picks who they want to win, vode trying to recreate the dance routines. They learn internet dances and social media trends. A few of those get out and go viral on the Star Wars version of TikTok or Insta or whatever.

A lot of their messing around is filmed, most of it, and while the internet trends are put out harmlessly, the other stuff is kept filed away. Even those would often revive concerned comments about the bruises, but they’d usually be brushed off as combat injuries for soldiers. A lot of it goes out with the abuse footage Hound releases. To humanise the Vode at the same time as exposing the crimes.

The first people to stand up and share their own stories and claim their defence of the CG were some of the people on the lower levels. Then Freed slaves and planets like Naboo and Alderaan and Rhyloth.

Of course, the day the footage goes out it’s also seen by the Jedi and the rest of the GAR. They’re horrified. They had no idea.

The Guard know they didn’t know, the Guard are willing to forgive, but the gaps take time to heal. It’s a good thing Palpatine is gone, the war is over, and they have the time to do just that.

———

Thanks for the ask. This was fun and I love this AU.

:-) Inbox is always open.

[wisteriabookss]

My ACOSF Review (2/5 Stars)

Please respect my opinions. Not everything I say will be praiseful or nice. While I liked a lot of this book, a lot of it frustrated and bothered me. 

This review contains spoilers. Read at your own risk. 

This review will be more of an overall impression, and I will get more in depth about certain characters in future posts. 

I eventually got into the plot of the book, but I don’t think it was as great or creative as it could’ve been. I feel like SJM recycled ideas she’s already used to create the storyline. A quest to find a magic object that can stop a war and save the world? That sentence applies to both ACOWAR and ACOSF. It’s even more disappointing when you know there were other routes the plot could’ve taken but were eventually scratched. It was the perfect set up for an Illyrian mountain setting, it was written in canon, and, unsurprisingly, SJM retconned and changed it. 

The Valkyrie plot was cool, if a bit forced and out of place. Nesta barely starts training, and all of a sudden she wants to recreate a powerful band of female warriors that we’ve never heard of in the context of this world? Honestly, it feels like SJM watched Thor: Ragnarok, and was like, “Yes, that’s what I’m gonna do.” I thought Helions winged horses would come into play with that, but I guess we’ll have to see.

I thought the Blood Rite plot was gone, but we got it in the end, even though it was rushed. The most beautiful parts of the book happened during the Rite, so I’m glad we got to see those.

The ending of Briallyn was so swift I literally had to go back a page to make sure I read it right. Literally one page, and she’s killed. I expected more. I can’t say I'm surprised by how rushed her death was when I knew the Feysand trouble was approaching, and the number of pages left was getting smaller. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that SJM would save Rhys, Feyre, and their baby. Out of the entire ensemble in Kingdom of Ash, she only had the heart to kill Gavriel, who wasn’t too much of a main character. There was no way in hell she would do that to Feysand. 

I’m sorry, but I do not like the name Nyx. Imagine calling someone Nyx? Did she originally have it as Nick, but just needed to put an X? My eyes were rolling so hard when I read it. Just put an ‘O’ in front of it and end our misery, though I still would’ve rolled my eyes at that name too. The name just reminds me of all the blogger moms who put X’s in their child’s names for dramatic effect that ends up looking like they can’t spell.

I also didn’t appreciate the out of touch colloquialisms in this book either. Prythian doesn’t have a name for anxiety, depression, or PTSD, but they know what lactic acid means?

The amount of sex in this book was something we had been warned to expect, and I think due to the fastness of me reading this book (finished in two sittings), it made it feel like the sex was happening every other page, which it basically was. I’m not going to be mad though because a) it was well written, b) I didn’t feel like it harmed the plot too much, and c) this is the only Nessian smut we’re going to see in canon. But that threesome line with Az. . . y'all know which one I’m talking about. . . the one with the details about certain positions. . .  chile um anyways let’s move on. 

I called it months ago that Emerie would either be Mor or Azriel’s love interest, and looks like it’s going to be Mor. SJM’s writing is fairly predictable, especially when it comes to romantic ships, and she couldn’t have been more obvious about the two of them. I will write about Gwyn and Azriel in Azriel’s chapter review (cause that monstrosity needs a post of its own).

Now about Nesta’s healing arc. Some of it was satisfying and others were saddening. I’m happy that Nesta was able to find purpose in her life, and not believe herself to be worthless or pathetic, but strong and powerful. I’m happy she found Gwynn and Emerie; I love their friendship. I love how they stuck by each other no matter what, and saw the good and potential in one another.

However, even by the end of the book, Nesta still thinks herself as undeserving. Of Cassian, of love. She knows she has it, and she's so grateful for it, but she still believes she is undeserving of it, that Cassian is just so much better than her. A part of learning to love and live with yourself is knowing what you deserve, so why SJM took that from her character, I don’t know. I was continuously disappointed when said she was undeserving of anything, even after she had learned and grown from her mistakes. 

Maybe SJM thinks the belief of being undeserving of one's partner is romantic. I’m telling you now, it’s not. All that does is give unnecessary power to a person you believe you are undeserving of, and this leads to unequal power dynamics in a relationship. Rhys was the exact same with Feyre, so I’m guessing it's a theme.

Speaking of romantic themes, the repetition of the “your mine-im yours” line in this book was nauseating. Your going to make Nesta say the exact same thing her sister said when they had sex? Is there nothing else SJM could’ve come up with? It’s just so weird. And I swear to god if I see Elain do the same thing I’m gonna vomit. 

Nesta apologized to Cassian about what she said to him on Solstice in ACOFAS as if he never called her unlovable. As if he never said he didn’t understand why her sisters love her. He never apologized for that. There was so much apologizing from Nesta to Cassian about her calling him a brute, as if Cassian didn’t say he was “shackled” to her after she clearly explained how she feared she would lose her humanity if she accepted the word mate. Not if she accepted him, but the word. 

For Cassian to routinely tell Nesta to, “shut her fucking mouth,” when she used some attitude against Rhys was comical. Rhys has been bad mouthing and disrespecting Nesta this whole time, and when she shows some warranted attitude in return (not even an insult), Cassian rips into her. It doesn’t matter what he did for you, babe. Not everyone has the same experience with Rhys, so Cassian getting angry when Nesta showing anger at the way she was being treated was wrong. Her experience with him does not become invalidated just because Cassian has a good relationship with him.

There wasn’t a character arc for Cassian, which was one of the most disappointing parts of the book. He thinks of himself as inferior and undeserving as well, and by the end of the book it’s not even clear if that stance has changed. We saw him grow into the courtier persona in the meeting with Eris when Tamlin shows up, but we never see it again. I know there were instances in which he stood up for Nesta, but he also very quicky after that became silent in other moments when they were insulting her. The next book isn’t in his pov, but I’m hoping we see him become more confident in himself and make a firmer stance to protect Nesta (although I doubt he’ll need to seeing as how Rhys kisses the ground she walks on now).

Now onto Nesta’s apologies to the IC. I think Nesta apologizing to Feyre was expected, and I’m glad the sisters had that moment. I am, however, upset that there was never a moment where all the sisters sat down, and hashed it out. Talked about what they’d been through, how it affected them, and how it affected their feelings toward each other. After everything that happened between Nesta and Elain, all that hurt, you’re telling me all it took was Nesta to make Elain laugh by saying “fuck you,” and we’re good? It’s lazy writing. 

Elain telling Nesta that she only cared about how her trauma affected her did not sit right with me. Nesta sat by Elain’s side for weeks when she was in the thick of her struggles, and refused to leave her alone for fear that her struggles would eat her up alive. She constantly looked for anything that could help her sister, and never left her unprotected. Nesta and Elain didn’t communicate after the war, for reasons that we now know was because of Nesta’s guilt for Elain being kidnapped. It is not abnormal when a family member has been traumatized by things that have happened to another family member. That’s expected. Ask any family who has lost a child or had a relative go through something horrible.

Elain is acting as if Nesta has only ever been concerned with herself when she’s spent her entire life concerned with Elain. I made a post long ago about how the IC only wanted Nesta to heal for their sake rather than her sake, and there’s so much more evidence for that than for Elain. Elain’s healing process was able to be understood and encouraged by the IC, whereas they had no idea what to do with Nesta. So for Elain to come at Nesta for not caring about her trauma, a second after Nesta was trying to protect her from further trauma by telling her she didn't want her seering for the Trove, was unwarranted.

Speaking about Elain looking for the Trove, what happened there? Elain had this whole speech where she said she wanted to do something and no one could stop her and then we just. . . don’t hear anything about it again? SJM had a perfect opportunity to do something powerful with Elain there, and completely threw it away. 

Nesta’s apology to Amren was extreme, dramatic, and honestly, unnecessary. Amren called Nesta a “pathetic waste of life,” constantly demeaned and degraded her anytime her name was mentioned, and said she did all this because Nesta used her as a shield against her problems and the IC. Seriously? Nesta using Amren as a shield does not warrant that kind of verbal abuse. It doesn't make her a pathetic waste of life. Amren’s been alive for how long? And reacts like that to an obvious side effect of extreme trauma? No ma'am. Nesta getting on her damn knees was too much, and obviously just another moment, like a lot of moments, that SJM felt the need to make dramatic. And then having the audacity to let Amren say to Nesta that, “the struggle with the darkness is worth it,” when she was one of those people who contributed to that darkness is disgusting.

I didn’t like Rhys at all in this book. Even after he saw inside Nesta’s mind about her experience in the cauldron, he was still wary and rude with her. Literally anytime Nesta showed that she was changing, Rhys didn’t change anything about his attitude or behavior towards her. A moment of regret, and then he’s back to being arrogant ass Rhys. Him not telling Feyre about the baby was also extremely stupid. It’s her body, her life, her baby’s life, his life, and she had a right to know what was happening. Not telling her because you didn’t want her to be “upset,” is a dumb excuse. I thought you always promised to let her make her own decisions, Rhys? What happened to that promise? The one that was a hell of a lot better than the stupid bargain ya’ll made? Though Nesta told her out of anger, good on her for telling her sister. Should’ve happened way sooner. His apology to Nesta was the only one that warranted the dramatics. That is what you get on your knees for.

That whole scene about him becoming High King had me throwing the book. Amren telling Rhys that the swords were some sort of mother-mary-cauldron-blessed-hallelujah sign that he was supposed to be High King had me fuming. It’s Nesta’s power. It’s Nesta’s sword. That should have never been a discussion. Not everything is for Rhys. These people are so blinded by their love for him they can’t even see how arrogant he is. To write Nesta giving back Ataraxia made me so angry after we just had a whole moment where we find out it means inner peace. I just hope that all of this is not foreshadowing Rhys becoming High King. I know you love him Sarah, but please don’t.

All in all, this book wasn’t too bad. There were some great moments and some bad moments. I think SJM’s biggest issue in her writing is that she doesn’t outline, or at least doesn't seem to outline, not thoroughly. I feel like she uses plot devices willy nilly whenever it’s the easiest solution. There was never a moment where I said, “that was clever!” A lot of it was cool, but not clever. Not creative. She also has a tendency to write very dramatically, in staccato type sentences where everything is made into a big moment, which bugs me a lot. 

I love Nesta. She’s still my fav, and will probably always be my fav. This book doesn’t change that, and as you can tell in my review, most of the issues I had weren’t with her behavior, but with the behavior of other characters. I still love Cassian, even though he made me want to rip my hair out sometimes.

Will I read the next books? Probably. I can’t seem to stay away from these characters or these books, so kudos to SJM for writing them. I know a majority of people have given this book 4 or 5 stars, but I can’t bring myself to give it more than 2/5.

[theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin]

Hi! Anon form HP's classmates ask. After reading the Lavender, Parvati, Dean, and Seamus, I forgot to ask you these: Cedric (I don't think you did him), Cho (pretty sure you didn't do her), and Marietta (even though we barely see anything of her). Oh and also Colin if you can. If it's too long just do the first two. Thanks, and have a good and safe day! =)

Well, I have to confess, these will probably be a lot more boring than you’re expecting. I do tend to have opinions on arbitrary Harry Potter characters, but there’s also a lot of NPCs that, well, I really don’t think about them much. They’re kids, they go to school, seem nice enough, the end. 

Not all my opinions are made of spice.

But, with that, let’s begin.

Cedric Diggory

Really not much to say on him.

Seems like a nice enough guy, I appreciated that he was a Hufflepuff so we got to see at least someone from that house that was a really cool dude, the house division also helped explain why we’d seen and heard so little about him (I think he gets a brief mention as being Seeker for Hufflepuff in Prisoner of Azkaban).

For me, what stands out about him is mostly the tragedy. Here was this young man, in the prime of his life, with his whole future ahead of him who senselessly dies.

Had he not accompanied Harry, he would have lived, and it was pure unfortunate luck that he did. And then it’s over so quickly, just a demand of “kill the spare” and he’s dead. That’s it, it’s all over.

And then his death is made a mockery of, overwritten, then willfully forgotten by society.

He’s used as evidence by Harry and Dumbledore for Voldemort’s return, his murder is pinned on Harry by the government, and by the time the government admits to what happened they’ve moved on to bigger problems.

We only really see the mourning of Cedric from his father and later Cho. Harry’s messed up about it, but it was more from witnessing the event, he didn’t really know Cedric that well as a person. In fact, he feels very awkward and put out when it becomes clear that, a few months later, Cho is not handling her boyfriend having been murdered by a dead man very well.

And that’s what strikes me about him, just how easily he’s forgotten, and how sad it all is.

Cedric might be the reddest of red shirts in Harry Potter.

Cho Chang

I wish more had been done with Cho.

I know, I know, we get a lot of Cho.

But we get Cho in the context of Harry’s first romance, his crush that later sets him up for Harry/Ginny (JKR is fond of using other pairings to set up her main pairing, we see this also with Ron/Lavender). They give it a whirl, Harry finally gets what he wants, and it turns out to not really be his thing.

Cho is too girly, enjoys things like Madame Puddifoots, and is clearly still hung up on Cedric. The whole thing ends very awkwardly and we get a Harry who’s ready to move on to Ginny by book six.

That said, that’s what I like about Cho. She has this great boyfriend who she really liked, he dies horrifically and tragically, and she’s left trying to sort through the aftermath. She ends up clinging to Harry as he is a) Harry Potter and essentially Jesus b) the only witness to what happened to Cedric. To her, I imagine, she and Harry share this unbreakable bond after fourth year. She was closest to Cedric in the school, the only one who truly seems to want to mourn him, and Harry watched Cedric die. 

Cho lives in this world where Cedric’s death has been made a political issue. That his dying seems not to have mattered, indeed, is barely discussed so much as the manner in which he died. People are constantly fighting whether a deranged Harry did it, Voldemort came back, and Cedric gets forgotten somewhere in the middle.

And Cho tries to move on, she tries to embrace the fight against Voldemort, prepare herself to defend her nation and help fight against the man who murdered Cedric, but it just doesn’t work out. Because ultimately, they’re a bunch of kids in a room practicing the patronus. And even in the DA, despite acknowledging that Voldemort’s back, it’s still never about Cedric. It’s all about Voldemort and what’s coming, Cedric, oh yeah, poor guy, what a tragedy, the first casualty of war.

So, mostly I just feel very bad for Cho, and wish we could have seen more of her to see what the effect death has on people. We have Harry’s reaction to Sirius’ death but... in a weird way he actually gets over that kind of quickly. This isn’t the post for it, but to me Harry was always more upset by the loss of what Sirius represented than Sirius himself.

Marietta Edgecombe

Marietta does not deserve the hate she gets. Sure, she decided to leave the DA and snitched. But you know what, they’re fifteen year olds in a boarding school, and the DA while stupid was also kind of terrifying.

I mean, you suddenly find yourself in a group called “Dumbledore’s Army”, which is actively preparing itself for “fighting against the dark lord” and possibly “against those who deny his return”. The club has all these rules about secrecy, which at first seem reasonable as it’s against the rules, but then start sounding pretty scary. It sounds like you just signed up to launch a coup against the ministry on Albus Dumbledore’s behest. Had I been in DA,I like to imagine at some point I’d start thinking “what the actual fuck?”

More than that, Marietta’s family is on the line. Her mother works for the ministry. Her mother could be fired or perhaps even persecuted if this got out. Shit starts getting very real for Marietta.

So, Marietta leaves and snitches, and then she gets stitches.

Hermione gleefully scars and deforms her, something Marietta will carry with her for the rest of her life. I mean, can you imagine if Hermione had said, “Oh, by the way, if you rat us out I will personally murder you. Just kidding, but I will cut up your face, snitch” that anyone would react well? Which is probably why Hermione just stuck to an ominous vague warning instead. The true noble members, after all, would never think of leaving.

So yeah, given Hermione, actually given all of it (including Harry’s complete lack of sympathy for Marietta being branded when Cho tries to bring up her situation) the DA absolutely should have been shut down. My god, it was spiraling out of control, and given Harry and Hermione could have honestly gotten to the point where they took out hits on, oh I don’t know, Draco Malfoy. 

You laugh, but I’m serious, they would totally do that.

Colin Creevy

It’s very bold of JKR to assume I care at all about Colin.

Colin’s one of the typical HP NPCs, quirky enough to be memorable, gives us a nice muggleborn student, weird kid but around enough that we remember him.

Then he dies in the Battle of Hogwarts, where many of our main characters survive, and I’m supposed to be absolutely devastated. COLIN IS DEAD, FRED IS DEAD, THE WORLD IS SO SAD.

We barely know Colin, his dying is just there to wrack up the red shirt numbers and make the last book of Harry Potter feel more like an actual war with actual consequences.

Sad that he died, but certainly not a tear jerking moment for me.

[melodyalanaroster]

To answer some Fanfic Questions...

So, this is my response to @broxklynn‘s post... I decided to make this its own post... So that It can be properly answered.

1. How and why did you start to write? Is there some kind of story behind it?

I started writing in general when I was in elementary school... Back when I just had a Platform 9 3/4 journal, not many friends, recess, and a desire to immerse myself in the world of Harry Potter. I enjoyed writing, and even joined the Writer’s Club in High School (but I eventually left to join Anime Club and Divergent Thinking Society). As for writing MCL fanfiction, I began writing Sam’s and Alana’s stories as early as when I first got into the fandom, back in 2013. Alana’s story started out as “A Fresh Start”, had a one shot called “When I Wake”, then turned into “Let The Dawn Be Broken”, and is now “The Melancholy Of Melody Alana Roster”. The final product barely has any hints of the first 3... In fact, Sam’s story, “Fighting Darkness”, has been completely debunked due to what I’ve decided to canonize in “The Melancholy Of Melody Alana Roster”. Writing MCL fanfiction has been a major help in distracting me from the depression that was caused by family issues, severe abuse, Stockholm Syndrome, my mom’s disease and her death, as well as working at several shitty jobs. Writing has helped me escape reality and keep myself sane enough to not be a black hole of hate, anger, and sadness to my friends and boyfriend.

2. What do you struggle the most with your writing?

There are 2 major things I struggle with... 1 is Timing. I often set deadlines for myself that I never meet and it makes me so frustrated that I miss them... There are currently things in my drafts that were meant to be “Holiday Specials” for Valentine’s Day and Halloween 2020 that are still unfinished... It makes me feel like I’m letting my readers down, when its more of me letting myself down... The other thing is Inspiration. Because I hate my job, I often think about Alana’s story in an effort to not be completely consumed by the fact that I do hate my work... Due to that, I often come up with ideas for my story that I think are FANTASTIC for my story... But, by the time I get home, I’m either in too much pain or too tired to write, or I’ve forgotten the ideas...

3. What is your favorite genre to write?

I love writing Romance with a bit of Slice of Life and a hint of Action/Adventure... 

4. Slowburn or “Flame”/PWP?

Slow burn any day.

5. How do you overcome writer’s block?

If I absolutely can’t write... I work on other stuff I need to do... Typically, something around the house, or something online I need to do... I also look for cool stuff to add to wish lists... I’ll occasionally play videogames or read comic books... In an effort to subvert writer’s block, I like having multiple chapters in my drafts at once. If I’m not in the mood to work on one chapter, I can work on a different one.

6. What kind of thing you dislike the most, when reading a fanfiction? (for example: particular plot, grammar mistakes)

One thing that makes me upset (and it makes me madder when I do this) is misspelling... Especially when it looks like its almost blatant... You have autocorrect, USE IT! Or when a fanfic is so awful, yet the author acts like their work is a gift from god... I don’t mind a “bad” fanfiction... Hell, the concept of “My Immortal” is so bad that its hilarious... But Fifty Shades did a lot of damage and E.L. James acts like she’s bigger than Jesus... Seriously, she wrote Twilight fanfiction, changed some minor details and names, people who have no knowledge of BDSM ate it up, and she acts like she’s a “Sex and Relationship Guru”...

7. What’s the biggest issue for you, when writing a Beemoov fanfiction?

The biggest issue for me is finding out when to allow for Beemoov’s writing and placement to take place in my story. I don’t like a lot of the events of UL and LL, so I’m often finding myself in a position where I have to watch video playthroughs and go “Okay, how can I omit this character, but keep this scene?”. I’ve had to do that A LOT with Alexy and Rosalaya.... Although, to a certain extent, I’ll often cut their scenes out altogether. I really hate what Beemoov did to them. They were great characters in HSL, but became utter shit in UL and stayed shit in LL. To make up for Beemoov’s writing style, I’ve created my own characters, added in old characters (like Kentin and Armin), added in bits from the manga (like Viktor, Severina and their fathers), and gone off on my own storyline. The Melancholy Of Melody Alana Roster is close to MCL at times, but often veers off onto its own road.

8. Have you ever created a character based on person in real life? (celebrity, someone that you know, etc)

YES!!! A LOT of characters in my story are based on real people! Alana’s step-father, Nate Films, is closely based on Nathan Fillion. A lot of her family members are based on members of my own family, just changed a bit to fit the story. Lynne Roster, Alana’s mom, is what I had always dreamed my own mom would be... Hell, Alana’s cat, Sylvester, is based on my own childhood cat, Luna.

9. How do you feel about your own characters? Do you think of them as your babies or have rather love-hate relationship with them? (And, do you have favorite one?)

I love most of my characters. I do hate 3 in particular... But, you’re supposed to hate, or at least not respect, them... That’s why I poured my hatred into them... Those 3 are Carol, Kai and Azrael. Carol has aspects of my abuser in her. You’ll see more of her when I finally post the HSL related chapters... And understand what I mean... Kai is based on one of my real life cousins that I’ve not been happy with for years (the one who my bf has deemed “the family failure”). You mainly see him in the Cousin Mels chapters, and in the Christmas Special... Azrael is the one who is seen the most in the UL chapters, and she is a main adversary for Alana. She is the one who broke her the most, the one who ended Alana’s relationship with Nathaniel, the one who truly traumatized her. As for ones I love... The one I love the most is Alana... I know, she’s a reflection of me, so that’s kind of vain... But, she’s a part of me. When I do finish her story and am at the point where I need to say “Goodbye”, it will hurt....

10. Enemies-to-lovers or friends/bestfriends-to lovers?

Definitely friends/best friends to lovers. I also like toying with what happens when best friends turn to lovers, but circumstance parts them and one moves on...

11. Is it easy for you to get inside your character’s head? Can you empathize with them? Is there’s some similarities between you and your main character?

It is VERY easy for me to get into Alana’s head... Like I said in #9, she is a reflection of me. She looks and acts like how I’d like to in a lot of situations... Her life is more interesting, traumatized, and more well off than mine... But, she is still me in major ways...

12. Who has been the biggest supporter of your writing?

Definitely my boyfriend. He doesn’t really understand the game itself... But, he likes how happy it makes me and he respects how much of my heart, soul, blood, sweat and tears that I’ve poured into writing my story. He loves listening to me read passages from it to him while I’m working. He gives me advice and his opinion is highly valued... My family knows I’m writing a large story, and have seen some of the images that I’ve gotten commissioned, but they don’t really know or care about the game. They do respect the fact that I am writing. They love the fact that I’m slightly following in my mom’s footsteps in that regard (she wrote 3 books and several poems). My online friends have been very supportive as well! I’m constantly updating them on what I’ve worked on each day in my Discord Server and the words of encouragement always help.

13. How do you handle criticism?

Not well. Due to the abuse and family issues mentioned in #1, for a good amount of my life, I’ve gotten nothing but harsh criticism... So, now that I’m away from all that, at 26 years old, I’m just now getting to a point where I’m starting to take it better... But, I’ve got a long way to go.

14. Do you like giving your characters trauma? Why/why not?

I hate sounding like a sadist... But, I’m going to anyway, so fuck it... Yes. I have done awful things to Alana over the years. In A Fresh Start, she got sexually assaulted and ostracized. In When I Wake, she gets into a car crash, put into a coma, and in her dream state murdered by Francis in front of Nathaniel. In Let The Dawn Be Broken, the plan was for her to end a war. In “The Melancholy of Melody Alana Roster”, her childhood cat dies, her mom gets sick, she gets abused by Carol, her best friends get ripped away from her for a bit, she gets sent to a country halfway around the world alone, she gets assaulted and ultimately turned into a weapon of mass destruction.... I’ve even thought of killing her mom off at one point... But decided against it...

Now, granted, A Fresh Start and Let The Dawn Be Broken never saw completion, but happy endings were planned for them...

I do this, all while giving Alana happy endings in each story because “If Alana can go through utter hell and make it through, then so can I.”... I know, I’m “god” in that regard and I can control how Alana’s life is.... But, the fact that in my writing, she ends up standing tall, happy, with everything she wants, after everything she goes through does make me feel better.... 

15. Are you proud of yourself? When you look at first piece you wrote and compare it to the latest one?

Yes. If you look at A Fresh Start, you can tell it was written by someone fresh out of High School. There’s no real depth to it. Let The Dawn Be Broken isn’t much better... But, The Melancholy of Melody Alana Roster has become my magnum opus. It is the largest piece I have EVER written, and will probably remain the largest piece I write. I am very proud of what I have created... And when its last word is written, and I am ready to get it made for it’s place on my shelf, I will feel very bittersweet about it... That being said, my original plan for a sequel involving Nathaniel’s and Alana’s daughter, Aurora, has been discarded. I don’t believe Aurora could ever have as much of my heart that her parents do...

And there you have it! Some insight into my world, writing, and history!

[youwerenevermeanttofeelalone]

Of Freckles and War | Fred Weasley

✦ pairing — Fred Weasley x Mexican American Plus Size Reader (she/her)

✦ word count — 4k

✦ summary — you were only supposed to provide security for Bill and Fleur’s wedding.

✦ warnings — angst, mentions of war, some violence, fluff

✦ a/n — this was requested by a lovely reader who showed me a receipt of her donation (based off this post). Thank you so much, @5pantherpride, first of all for donating and of course for trusting me with this.

❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎

Weddings — you were neutral to them. You even were glad for people who fulfilled their goal to marry, but you found the timing of Bill’s and Fleur’s less than ideal.

The Order had a lot of things to worry about. Short on members and with the infiltration in The Ministry at its peak, you surely wished you could help in better ways.

Security duty wasn’t new to you, but it was the first time you were to fulfill it without Moody. His death was another reason why you wished you could be somewhere else. He had been the closest thing you had to a mentor.

At least the dress fit you nicely, way better than you had imagined it would. Finding one in such times hadn’t been the easiest task, much less with your schedule.

Offering to help with the guests so you could watch them closely, you introduced yourself to Bill’s twin brothers.

You had seen them before from afar, but that was it. Mrs. Weasley constantly said they were too young to be part of The Order so you assumed staying away to avoid problems would be better.

Smiling at the first arriving guests, you consulted the seating plan and guided them to their seats.

“Shut your mouth,” George snickered, pushing Fred’s chin so his mouth would clamp closed.

Fred shook his head, realizing he hadn’t stopped staring at the spot you had been standing in.

The marquee filled with voices and laughs rather soon. Your nerves increased as people continued arriving, unable to shake the bad feeling simmering in your stomach.

The more you thought about it, the more sense having a wedding in such unprecedented times made. Bill and Fleur just as their families, could very well be captured or killed at any moment. A gathering like this, though, was beyond your logical understanding.

He was sure you liked his brother, although he didn’t understand why when he had always been slightly more handsome, but that didn’t stop Fred from approaching you.

“Would you like to dance?”

You turned around to acknowledge him. “I would.”

He offered his hand staring intently at you as you placed your palm on top of his. He took a shaky breath in and guided you to the dancing area.

“I’m Fred, by the way,” he felt the need to let you know.

“I am aware.”

Tilting his head, he halted his steps on a spot away from his mom.

You explained, “You have a scar on your left eyebrow.”

Impressed, Fred placed a hand on your waist to lead you. In answer you rested your other hand on his shoulder, looking just past it.

Harry seemed to be annoyed by something —or someone— which made you believe he had seen or heard something suspicious.

“Is there someone you would rather be dancing with behind me?”

You shook your head, dragging your eyes back to Fred. “Of course not. I’m just being— oh, Merlin, what’s that word? Worried? No, no. Cuidadosa... cautelosa podría ser... Madre de Dios, ¿cómo se dice en inglés?”

[Careful... it could be cautious... Mother of God, how do you say it in English?]

The couple closest to you stared in confusion as you kept going. “¿Meticulosa? No, eso no tiene sentido... cuidadosa, sí. Lo cual es lo mismo que cautelosa pero cómo se dice...”

[Meticulous? No, that doesn’t make sense. Careful, yes. Which is the same as cautious but how do you say it...]

Fred pursed his lips at your language switch. Your accents were different in each one which caught his attention. He wanted to know why, if you had learned them both at the same time, or which one was your native language.

Entertaining the sad idea that you might have been trying to ditch him, he suddenly frowned. “You’re looking for an excuse to leave?”

“No, no!” You whined, sure you had said the word in the past few days. “How is it called when someone is being careful because they are worried? It starts with a W.”

“...wary?”

You could’ve kissed him. “Yes, that one!”

With a lingering laugh in his voice, he tried to reason with you, “Well, Bill and Fleur didn’t invite many people.”

“No, but polyjuice exists. I could be a Death Eater disguised as me and you wouldn’t have noticed.”

“That accent wouldn’t be easy to mimic, don’t worry.”

“It’s easier to understand than some I’ve heard around here,” you defended yourself, not offended at all by his comment.

A light irrupted into the marquee and you immediately knew whose Patronus it was.

Kingsley’s message proved you right and triggered panic as mayhem all over the place ensued. You pulled your wand out, looking around to see how many people were left.

Leaving would have been a good idea, but too many invitees had fled already and it would bring more trouble to The Weasley Family.

Not unfamiliar with their scare tactics, you did your best to remain calm as the Death Eaters questioned the family.

You admired how unfazed they tried to appear as their house was inspected. They must’ve been expecting the visit for days now.

“I’ll prepare tea,” Mrs. Weasley shakily said.

“Let me do it,” you mumbled, waving your wand as Bill helped his mother to sit down.

Mr. Weasley leaned over, reminding you to drop a splash of firewhiskey in his wife’s tea through a whisper. Nodding, you did as you were told and carried the cup toward the living room.

“You are staying, right, (Y/N)?” Mr. Weasley asked as you waved your wand to pour a cup of tea for Fleur’s mom.

“I don’t want to impose,” you assured them, “I can manage on my own — it would be safer for everyone.”

“I would feel better if you stayed,” Mr. Weasley sighed, “Everyone here would.”

“Kingsley said—“

“I’ll talk to him,” he interrupted.

You turned to look at everyone else, but no one added any other comment.

You couldn’t sleep. The room wasn’t the problem, nor the accommodations The Weasleys had given you — everything else was. People were disappearing at a worryingly exponential rate, and you couldn’t shake off the guilt of not being out there helping in some way.

❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎

The Weasleys would surely be watched carefully and suddenly leaving The Burrow in the middle of the night would put a bigger target on them.

You leaned onto the doorframe, watching the rain as it slowly fell down the garden. Grown used to the unruly weather such times had brought, you were trying to find pleasant parts in it like its smell and soothing sound.

“Can’t sleep either?”

You craned your neck to look at Fred. He rubbed his eye with his right hand as he held a glass of water in his left.

“The weather is nice.”

Humming, he chugged the water down. Instead of going back to sleep, he pulled a chair out and then another. Fred sat down on the second one, waiting for you to take the other.

You did so, thanking him in a nod. The kitchen, only illuminated by the fading light the lamps outside gave, felt bigger than it was.

“Is Ginny giving you trouble?”

“No,” you answered immediately. His sister was lovely, she kept mostly to herself which you understood but on occasions, she would ask about which other jobs you had done for The Order.

You learned she wanted to join The Order more than anything. She would also talk highly of her siblings, even teasing you when you asked more about Fred.

Your dance had been cut off, so had the conversation. You had enjoyed yourself for once, of course you would want to know more about him.

After watching him from afar for an entire summer, you had imagined that not stuttering around him was progress. But you were at war, and war didn’t give time for getting to know people you’ve been crushing on for a while.

He took you out of your self-absorption, “You said it would be safer if you didn’t stay here. Why?”

Ah, that. “I have history with... them.”

You didn’t explain yourself further on and Fred sensed he shouldn’t press on it for now.

He opened his mouth to make a joke and lighten up the mood, but you spoke first, “Do you think muggles will have enough help?”

No, he didn’t think so. However, Fred didn’t have the heart to tell you that. “There are a handful of good witches and wizards out there still.”

You nodded. Good witches and wizards' existence wouldn’t make a difference if they didn’t act on it, but for some reason, you didn’t have the heart to tell him that.

He would surely be able to take it, he probably knew it already — but you didn’t want to say it out loud either way.

Fred placed a hand on top of yours, squeezing it. You must’ve looked like you needed comfort. Lifting your fingers so his own would fit between them, you gripped his.

The Kitchen started appearing clearer as the blue light of the early morning entered through the door and windows.

Under the blue tones, Fred’s eyebrow scar looked clearer. You could’ve counted his freckles if you had enough time. But you couldn’t, Mrs. Weasley would need help around the house at any minute.

Deciding it was better to go get ready for the day, you begrudgingly withdrew your hand. Fred’s eyes danced over your face, trying to assess what you would do next.

“Thank you for the company,” you whispered, not taking your eyes off his face either.

His eyes dropped to your lips only to go back to your eyes. Clearing his throat, he nodded, “No problem.”

❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎

More people were reported as disappeared as the weeks progressed. Your worries only increased as news from members of The Order got more sporadic — it was safer that way, and detrimental to your mental wellbeing.

You had the bedroom for yourself now. Ginny had taken The Hogwarts’ Express a couple of weeks ago. She had been upset, but not more than her family with the number of changes the school seemingly had made.

You wondered how Ilvermorny was doing.

Although you were living with four people, you didn’t talk much to them. Mr. Weasley was overwhelmed with work constantly, Mrs. Weasley tried to keep herself busy around the house, Fred and George had a shop to attend and sporadically helped their friend Lee with Potterwatch.

As for yourself, you were able to help The Order here and there. Nothing too extreme so you wouldn’t gain unnecessary attention and put The Weasleys in more danger. That was why you hadn’t wanted to stay there.

“I would use Ginny’s bed if I were you,” Fred said from the doorway, surprised to see you hadn’t locked yourself that afternoon.

You put the clothes you had been folding to the side and looked up at him. “That would be invasive.”

“And funny. May I?”

You nodded. It was his house after all.

Fred did sit on Ginny’s bed, amused by what he was seeing. You supposed he wasn’t granted entrance that often.

He and George had an unspoken pact with their little sister, she didn’t try to sneak into their room and they wouldn’t threaten her privacy. It was great, but Fred had always been curious.

More curious he was as to what was going on with you. Mrs. Weasley had sent George to ask you if you needed anything and not him, probably because everyone considered his brother as the sensitive one.

“Mum’s worried.”

“I’m fine.”

He lifted an eyebrow. “When did I say she was worried about you?”

“Why else would you tell me?”

“To chat.”

You tilted your head. He was funny, but not a very good liar.

“You look really sad.”

“I feel useless,” you confessed, smoothing the sleeves of an old t-shirt. “I was supposed to become an Auror this year.” Sighing, you shook your head, “God, I sound entitled...”

“Aurors aren’t particularly safe at the moment.”

“Much less if there isn’t enough of them.”

Fred leaned over, resting his elbows on his thighs. “Why do you want to be one? It sounds like too much work.”

You shrugged, not sure anymore. You liked the idea of doing the right thing, being able to ensure people were safe and evil was kept in check... but doing it for a ministry didn’t sound like something you could do.

“It’s different in America,” you explained, pulling a pair of socks from the freshly done laundry. “Not better, I’ll admit that, just different. MACUSA didn’t stop taking on aurors, for example.”

“That doesn’t answer the question.”

The socks in your grasp fell to your lap. “I wanted to be ready for the moment when I had to fight them again.”

Silence fell between you. Fred’s eyes were on you like they seemed to always be since you arrived. There was no pity in his gaze, only understanding.

“I believe you’re still ready.”

“I hope you’re right.”

Fred smirked, “I’m always right.” He made a pause, slanting his head to the side. “Almost always.”

You chuckled. “Who said that?”

“I did.”

You had expected him to answer just that and yet you were still amused by the comment. Oh, you were falling quite fast.

And he knew it. There was no doubt in Fred’s mind that you actually liked him and not George. You didn’t stare at George as much as you stared at him nor smiled so brightly when you greeted his brother — you were nice to everyone but you were more comfortable with him and Fred really liked that.

He took your hands, making you stand up as he did the same. You liked the difference in size and how his hands didn’t feel soft like most people expected their crushes’ hands to be but warmer than any other hand you had taken.

Someone cleared their throat from the doorway. George stuck his head into the room. “Dinner.”

Fred nodded, “We’ll be there in a minute.”

George pursed his lips, lifting both eyebrows. He still left you alone, reminding both of you to not take too long.

This was his best chance. Fred leaned over, capturing your lips in a short kiss. You slid one of your hands off his grasp to place it on the back of his head, pulling him into another kiss. His free hand rested on your hip as you tilted your head to kiss him more comfortably.

“I can’t take you out right now...” he sighed, lips still brushing yours as your eyes barely fluttered open, “but maybe we could have a picnic when everybody is asleep?”

You smiled at him. “I’d like that.”

George shook you and Ginny awake. “Get up, we don’t have much time!”

You were up in a second. “What’s wrong? Where’s Fred?”

“Packing.” George pointed his wand at Ginny’s trunk.

“Where are we going?” Ginny asked, rubbing her eyes as you made George turn around so you could get changed.

“Somewhere safer. Death Eaters know we’ve been helping Harry.”

“I can’t go with y—“

“Just shut up and hurry,” George interrupted you, voice softer than one would expect those words to come out of anyone’s mouth.

Ginny and you would be the first ones to be gotten out of The Burrow. The others could take hours to join you or days, whichever was safer.

“We’ll need you and your training more than ever, (Y/N),” Mr. Weasley reminded you.

You cast a glance towards Ginny who was blinking furiously while bouncing her leg.

You nodded at Fred, silently assuring him you would protect his sister. He nodded back, not doubting it for a second.

Aunt Muriel was a weird woman. Clearly not a bad person, but perhaps an entitled one. Ginny had already told you to not take anything she said personally, but you hadn’t understood the warning until she made a comment about the color of your pajamas.

It didn’t take many days for the family to be as complete as it could. From what you knew, Charlie was still in Romania and no one had news of Percy. You had never met the latter but Fred had lengthily complained about him.

Speaking about Fred, he and George had packed more than Ginny and you for some reason. There were five trunks in their provisional room instead of two.

You asked for permission to enter which Fred granted with an enthusiastic nod. Closing the door behind you as he sat down on the bed, you then approached him.

“Are you okay?”

He nodded, eyes not meeting yours. “Can you... talk to me in Spanish or something?” Seeing your confusion, he abashedly explained, “It calms me.”

In the five months you had been together, Fred had never really reacted to your babbling in Spanish. You had assumed he was just unfazed, but his explanation made more sense.

You sat down next to him, placing a hand on his upper back. “Do you want a story?”

He nodded, “Anything.”

Fred laid down, curled up as his head rested on your lap. He listened attentively, wishing he could understand everything you were saying.

Maybe when the war was over you could teach him Spanish.

❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎・・・・・❖︎

Oh fuck. Turns out wounds not only hurt but stung — you had forgotten the last time you had been injured, probably that time Moody made you sneak into that shop in Knockturn Alley to look for an artifact.

“What were you thinking?!” Fred screeched, pushing Percy, who had been the one to move you to a safer spot, to the side to kneel beside you.

You looked at Mrs. Weasley who was battling Yaxley a few meters away from you, visibly desperate to approach her sons. “No mother should lose her child. My family is already dea—“

He shushed you, “Don’t.”

You tried to move, uncomfortable by the rubble digging into your back. Palming the ground in search of your wand, you whined.

“Do you need a bandage?”

You gritted your teeth. The pain in your lower stomach was unbearable and Ferula wouldn’t fix it.

“Can you cast healing spells?”

Fred shook his head, applying pressure to your wound.

“You would be a shit Auror.”

He knew you were making light of it, but he didn’t find it in him to laugh. “Tell me what to do.”

“Poke it and—“ you groaned. The hand he had on your stomach was shaking, making the pressure waver.

Your skin was losing color. He looked at Percy, desperate — his know-it-all brother had always been good at every class. He had to know.

Percy approached you, looking at you with sadness before looking at Fred. He was about to say he didn’t know what to do when Harry, Ron, and Hermione arrived to make sure all of you were safe on their way to The Shrieking Shack.

Harry only saw the blood on Fred’s hand and the desperation in his eyes. He had seen the same desperation in yours when you cast a spell that sent Fred flying out.

“I’ve seen Snape doing some type of magic... it puts the blood back in...”

You grunted, trying to nod.

“Is that the one?” Fred asked you.

You could only hum.

Thankfully, Mrs. Weasley was the one who did the spell. As amazing as Harry was, the part of his face you could still see looked terrified. He had enough on his plate already.

She slid her wand under your back, making the rock hurting you disappear. Closing your eyes, you gifted yourself a moment to breathe in and out.

“How come you didn’t know how to do it, Perce?”

You answered instead of Percy, “It’s not part of any school’s curriculum. It should, clearly, but it isn’t.”

“You would know that if you had finished school,” Mrs. Weasley said. You could’ve sworn she did so teasingly.

Innocently, you had thought saving Fred would be enough. As if loss would’ve disappeared from the world because he was safe. It was a nice concept, one you wished could be real for multiple reasons.

People you had considered the closest you had to a family like Nymphadora and Remus being the casualties of the war hadn’t crossed your mind.

It was over. At a high cost like every other war in history, yet you couldn’t believe it.

Fred, who was sat between you and George in The Great Hall, gave you a sideways glance.

He had properly known you for less than a year and you had already made him fear in ways he hadn’t only felt two times before — when Ginny was taken by Riddle to The Chamber of Secrets in his fifth year and when his dad had been attacked in his seventh year.

Dropping his hand on top of yours, he asked, “Do you want to take a walk?”

George turned to surprisedly look at his brother at the same time that you lifted your eyebrows. Your eyes crossed George’s who snickered before going back to his conversation with Lee.

“Sure,” you agreed, standing up.

Fred took your hand, walking aimlessly through the semi-destroyed halls. You could tell it affected him to watch his former school in such estate.

“You scared me.”

“I really didn’t want your mother to go through the loss of a child.”

He stopped the stroll quite abruptly. “So you wanted me to go through the loss of my girlfriend?”

“Fred...”

He shook his head, sliding his hand off yours to pass it through his hair. You didn’t know how it felt like, you hadn’t been the one watching their loved one bleed out in the middle of a battle.

He would’ve lost everything he had always wanted to have in a partner. Never had he imagined you would be so supportive of him, yet you had put up with his and George’s stupid plan of sending products by mail while the family had to hide at aunt Muriel’s and even helped them to package everything.

Everyone in the family liked you. He wouldn’t have cared if they didn’t, but it was nice to know that his partner was appreciated by the other people he loved so dearly.

Seeing a familiar frown on his brow, you warned him, “I’m not apologizing for doing it.”

Fred exploded. “What would have I done if something had happened to you?!” He yelled, using his hands to make emphasis.

You stood straighter, yelling back at him. “And what would have I done if that wall had collapsed on you?! Did you want me to stand there and watch?!”

Fred stayed silent which prompted you to add, in a softer tone, “It’s done, and it turned out okay.”

“It almost didn’t.”

“But it did,” you insisted.

His shoulders dropped. You were right, and bruised — but safe. The worst part was over already, he should have been focusing on that.

“You need to work on your anger issues,” you pointed out.

“And you need to stop throwing yourself into danger.”

You held your hands out for him to take. Fred opted for pulling you into a tight hug. The dust on his top itched your nose, but you didn’t have it in you to complain and instead hugged him back.

“I don’t want to live without you.”

”You’re everything I have left,” you mumbled on his chest, grimacing at the flavor of the dust clinging to your lips. “I mean, that includes your family and The Order, but you get what I mean.”

Humming, Fred rested his chin on the top of your head.

“My family really likes you. I think I’ll get disowned if I don’t marry you.”

“Is this your way of proposing?”

“Depends.”

“On?”

“Your answer, honestly. Don’t wanna look like a moron.”

Pushing him off to both look at him and have a break from the dust and grime on his clothes, you held him by the waist. Fred was serious, there was no mischief in his eyes as he waited for your answer.

“Well... I don’t want you to get disowned,” you joked, more nervous than you should have been. It was just him!

“And how else would I outdo Bill if it isn’t by marrying you?” he joked back.

Caressing his cheek, you nodded in agreement as a smile crept into your face. You were sure you would beam the same way Fleur had.

[twilightofthe]

So...about that Obitine Anidala rant. Also, you said something about how Sidious and Obi-Wan are foils. I would love it if you elaborate. (Also, I love your blog.)

Awwwww thank you anon!  I just be yelling on here!

*wheezes* okie doke!  Tho I stress that this won’t exactly be a rant because I adore Obitine and Anidala and rant kinda implies aggression towards them, this is more of just a long-ass ramble because while I love them, I don’t always love the way canon portrays them in the narrative, particularly in relationship to each other, because I often do not feel that what the show is trying to push us to think about them is accurate to how they actually act and come across.  Notably, the show attempts to draw comparisons to the two relationships that really don’t exist below surface level similarities.  Again, these are my own personal opinions, and in fact, I welcome discussion!  I truly do!  Please politely debate me on this if you disagree!

(god dammit it got long again, so long I’ll actually put ur Sidious and Obi Wan as foils part in a separate post)

I’ll get to why exactly the show compares the relationships very strangely in a moment, but first we gotta explore the reason why it does this in the first place, which is that the Clone Wars show has decided to make Obi Wan and Anakin narrative foils to one another.  Narrative foils, by the literary definition, are two characters that contrast one another.  They don’t have to be the protagonist and the antagonist, these characters can be on the same side, basically the thing is that they have “opposite” personalities where if one character is hot, the other is cold, if one character chooses to go right, the other will go left.  It’s usually used to show one character’s qualities as more favorable for the situation as opposed to anyone else’s.

TCW does this whenever they possibly can with Anakin and Obi Wan.  I get its reasoning behind it.  I do.  The reasoning is that while Anakin is supposed to be a main character, he makes questionable decisions quite often and for the kiddies watching, those decisions must be seen as Bad even if the hero does it, so they have Obi Wan, the unquestionable good guy, encounter the exact same scenarios Anakin makes his questionable decisions in, and then has Obi Wan make the Right(TM) decision to teach the kids a valuable lesson.  They turn Obi Wan into the voice of reason for the entire show, which turns basically almost everything Obi Wan and Anakin do into a constant competition in the narrative in a way the movies do not do (and I’ll get to the movies later).  I’m not saying it’s necessarily a bad thing, making them foils, but it’s definitely more of a show-only thing and it does it quite, quite often.

So yeah, TCW likes to compare Obi Wan and Anakin to the point that sometimes they try and use Obi Wan to diminish Anakin’s genuine trauma and struggles by going “well why didn’t you do it like THIS?” and I think that writing parallel plotlines for the purpose of shaming/criticism is kinda ://////, but that’s another rant for another day that again, if y’all wanna hear about, lmk

Anyway, the need to compare them absolutely made its way into their romantic relationships as well, as they acknowledge the similarities in the show, and Filoni and the crew explicitly compare the two relationships in interviews.

Basically my problem with how they try and draw said parallels can be boiled down to one quote by Filoni that a cursory Google search could not find but I know exists so y’all can take my word or not, that went along the lines of “Obi Wan and Satine are like Anakin and Padmé but better because they know how to stay unattached and let each other go.  They’re a success story.”  I disagreed with this quote so much it inspired me to write a whole-ass fic about it (Mutuals update: yes, it is coming soon, Darth Maul is just himself and therefore an utter pain in the ass to do a POV on and is fighting me like the bitchass he is)

My thesis that I will be arguing today is that while TCW tried to create Obitine as an Anidala parallel, they’re really not similar in the way the writers think they are.  Obitine is not a success story to Anidala, they’re a goddamn tragedy too; the real parallel to Anidala is that Obitine also ended in death and tears despite making all the “right” decisions instead of all the “wrong” ones, and that is what is sad about them.

Like, on the surface level?  Yeah, the crew-intended parallels are there.  A fancy politician and a Jedi get together after the Jedi is assigned as the politician’s bodyguard.  The first time they see each other in over a decade the guy’s first words are basically “damn girl you’re still hot”, there is Conflict(TM) and the choice to try and be together or stay yearningly apart because they are Forbidden(TM) to be together, and ultimately a Sith Lord fucks them both over because he’s obsessed with the Jedi and uses Politician Lady to his advantage, finds and exploits a vulnerability of hers, destroys her life’s work, and then lets her die to make Jedi Man sad.  The difference is all that one pair said “yeah we aren’t gonna break the rules to be together” and the other said “fuck it yeah we are, let’s do this”

But beneath all of that, they real similarities are different and not at all focused on by the narrative.  Obi Wan and Anakin are extremely different people, as are Padmé and Satine, so their relationship dynamics together will not be the same.  You want to try and compare Obi Wan and Anakin and then compare Satine and Padmé like the crew attempts to, and you can’t, they have the same job but not nearly the same life.  Namely, the funny coincidence is that Obi Wan and Padmé are much more similar in personality, while Anakin and Satine are also much more similar in personality, so the first time they meet again, it’s both Anakin and Satine as the one who’s been pining for over a decade and the one more actively pursuing the relationship, while Obi Wan and Padmé who are more like “uh, hi, wow, you’re hot and this is a Problem because I have a job to do pls don’t look at me like that but also I will Cause Problems On Purpose and flirt with you anyway because I can’t help it”.  I get the Corruption TCW ep with Sati and Pads was mostly intended just to help Satine pass the Bechdel test and also show how similar the two leading lady love interests are, but it was a genuinely creative episode that actually ended up showing how much Satine and Padmé compliment each other instead of mirroring each other, much like Obi Wan and Anakin do.

And, onto my next point, despite the character parallels being wrong, the parallels in the relationship are different too.  Like I said, the parallel isn’t that Obi Wan and Satine aren’t attached like Anakin and Padmé are.  The parallel is that Obitine is actively running from what that attachment means instead of embracing it like Anidala is.  The show would argue that since they try to avoid it, that they are able to live without one another, means they aren’t attached like the Jedi define it, but I argue that they definitely still are attached to a degree because they cannot give each other up.  They held torches for each other from a timerange of 15 YEARS.  Yes I know they spent an entire year together at a young and emotionally volatile point in their lives, but I stand that NO ONE is that hung up on their ex for that long unless there is some serious emotions involved.  Anakin was hung up on Padmé for ten years, and that was because Palpatine was constantly bolstering those affections and reminding him of Padmé.  Obes and Sati both-- or at least Satine, the show always makes Obi Wan’s feelings for Satine in return much more vague --held on to their feelings for five years longer without the influence of a Sith Lord.

And the thing is, they know it.  Obi Wan and Satine are both fully aware that they haven’t been able to shake each other off like they should and that that is a Problem, that’s why they’re both a mite venomous with each other beneath the flirting at first, they’re both extremely frustrated with themselves for not being able to get over this thing they have, and frustrated with the other for being there as an active temptation.

And yet, they still are attached to each other.  They try to avoid it, they definitely try, and that’s what makes them different from Anidala, but they are definitely still attached.  You can see it in Obi Wan’s actions in Voyage of Temptation when Merrik is threatening to blow the ship, the way he hesitates in attacking him because that would be “striking an unarmed man”.  Obi Wan Kenobi does not prefer violence, no, but he has never hesitated to cut a bitch before if it’s for the good of the many.  This is the man who stabbed someone with a fork and threatened to eat him just to maintain his cover as a dangerous criminal.  This is the guy who had no problem killing Zam Wessel for information to protect Padmé.  This is a pragmatist who prefers peaceful solutions, but he does not hesitate if he feels it is a justified offense.  But this time, when an entire shipful of people is at risk, Obi Wan hesitates.  Because he doesn’t want to upset Satine.  Because he’s probably thinking on how she told him that if he had killed the last terrorist they encountered, she wouldn’t speak to him, how she had criticized every time he used violence to escape Death Watch before.  He hesitates because he’s putting her happiness, just for a second, over the sake of duty.  Do I think that if Anakin hadn’t shown up to save their moral compasses, Obi Wan would have eventually taken out Merrik?  Absolutely; hell, I honestly think Satine might have done it.

But the matter was, Merrik could have pressed the kill switch any second of Obi Wan’s hesitation, and Obi Wan knew that, and was hesitating anyway.

I am calling this attachment solely because if the situation was reversed, if this was Anakin and Padmé in this situation, with Anakin not taking out a dangerous criminal because he doesn’t want to upset Padmé (lol ignoring the fact that Pads 1000% would have shot that bitch, and even if she didn’t, Anakin would because he is perfectly fine with hurting his loved ones’ feelings if he feels it’ll keep them safe), god, the narrative would have eaten Anakin alive.  

No, I won’t take criticism.  I know how the show handles the Anidala dynamic.  It would have shown Obi Wan popping up to take out the baddie as him doing the right thing and saving the day, and then Anakin would have been shamed for letting his feelings for his wife get in the way of protecting a shipful of people.  THAT would be the Vader foreshadowing, none of this “only a cold-blooded killer” shit, no way would they ever stick that label on Obi Wan.

So yeah, I’m going off of the fact that if that would have been classified as attachment for Anidala-- which, it would, then. it counts for Obitine.

And then Obi Wan and Satine continue to be hung up on each other for the rest of the eps they’re in, Satine saying in words multiple times how much she loves and cares about him and wishes things could be different, and Obi Wan performing it in actions, risking his own neck and political standing to help her even when she’s a fugitive, probably personally putting in to send his own grandpadawan to help her later.  Right up to the time when Satine decides that she is going to call Obi Wan when she is deposed.  Not the Senate.  Not any powerful politician friends.  Not even the Jedi Order or the Council as a whole.  She calls and addresses her distress call to Obi Wan alone.  And Obi Wan, as now revealed to us by TCW S7, defies Council orders and breaks a century old neutrality treaty to try and bust her, a convicted murderer in the eyes of the Republic and Mandalore, out.  He didn’t even know Maul had her.  Just knew she was in danger and came running to her aid.  He risks starting a potential war to come save her.  They acted so in love that Vizsla was able to guess from being around them for like five seconds, and was able to tell Maul exactly who he would need to bait Obi Wan.

That is where the attachment comes from.  It’s the fact that Obi Wan and Satine tried so, so hard to give each other up and do the right thing, but when it came down to it, they couldn’t lose the other one so they put them first when logically they shouldn’t.  And thus, Satine ended up dead.

Now I know most people will argue with me that actually Filoni means that since they didn’t stay together after the year on the run, THAT is what makes them able to give each other up, and also the fact that Obi Wan didn’t go dark side and murder everyone when Satine died.

But I still think that at least the murder front is a fairly low bar to cross, and anyway, that just because they could live without each other didn’t mean they weren’t still attached.  Anakin and Padmé were apart for 10 years and then even after that, they were apart almost constantly during the war.  Just because they could live apart or even past the other’s death didn’t mean they weren’t attached, as they both still had not let the other go mentally and also broke rules to try and ensure the other would not die, even if the rules said they should let it happen.

So yeah, that’s my big theory.  We can’t compare Obitine with Anidala by saying Obitine was a success story, we compare them by acknowledging that both struggled with attachments and letting the other go, but Obitine at least tried to the bitter end to do the right thing while Anidala didn’t really bother, and both ended up with dead women and broken men regardless, and that is the true sad parallel to me.

[xenophanatic]

In Depth Quasi-Analysis of Ramo: 'If the show was called Neco.’

Okay, so after seeing so many posts about this show, I thought “yeah, need a new addiction... and the guy looks hot.’ 

Sadly, I came to the realisation that the guy I found attractive wasn’t the main lead ‘Ramo’, but a side character name Neco. When I found the plot dull, I decided to skip the ‘main’ plotline and instead skip to Neco scenes - which all the posts were about anyway. So be aware that when I’m criticising the show, I haven’t watched the whole thing to deeply analyse every aspect. It’s like what The Witcher’s critics did. Also, I’m reading subtitles so things may get lost in translation.

Saying that... Ramo isn’t a good show. By the end of every episode I was fuming with distaste for the show. Ramo, as a character, is glorified to the point of irritation. As GRR Martin has stated, 

“It irritates me when I'm watching a movie and/or reading a book and the hero is going through incredible dangers, him and his six buddies, and none of them die.”

What I get from this quote, and other interviews from Martin, is that - as an audience - it gets annoying when each week Ramo is in danger, but we know he will get out of it - because he’s the main guy. He revokes on deals made with bad guys, sets up traps, shoots men down, and dodges all the consequences. Then the audience is forced to listen to others making speeches about the greatness of Ramo. “Ramo will die to save us!” - But don’t worry cos that won’t happen and Ramo will get everything he wants and win by the end of the episode. There may be a little setback here and there - which makes the episodes drag - but Ramo will win. Ramo is a cliche character that you have seen multiple times and therefore, isn’t engaging to watch. 

A moment to reflect on the comment made above about all characters praising the awesomeness of Ramo. The issue with the series, I found, is that everything is said. The exposition is down poorly and makes me cringe when characters just describe how they feel or their opinions about the situation. 

My brief summary of the show: Mob/Revenge Story - Ramo and his family/neighbour hood are members of the Pumper Gang, stealing and selling diesel illegally. Ramo also works for a richer gangster, Cengiz, who had killed Ramo’s dad. Cengiz and his father-in-law killed Ramo’s dad and Ramo wants revenge. Episode one pretty much ends with Ramo killing Cengiz. 

At first, I thought this was a good premise. Most revenge dramas begin with the act that thrusts the character on the path of revenge and ends with them achieving their goal; however, by ending the episode with the revenge coming to an end - the show has a chance to explore the implications and consequences of revenge. The tales similar to Monte Cristo, end with the character achieving their revenge - but what happens after. Do they feel content? Are they able to have a ‘normal’ life? What about the victims of their revenge? 

Going off track.... 

In the Indian verision of Hamlet, Haider (2014), Ghazala (Gertrude) tells Haider (Hamlet) that ‘revenge does not set us free’, ‘revenge begets revenge’, ‘violence only results in violence’, and that there is no end to this cycle, but Haider, who is bent on revenge, ignores these warnings. 

During the shootout of Ramo and Cengiz - Cengiz’s son, Neco, runs away and survives. Neco is then motivated to kill Ramo. This beautiful depicts the above statements. Ramo getting revenge for his father’s death, has now put Neco on a journey to avenge his father’s death. Will this cycle ever end?

However, sadly, this is not the story and the focus is on more on Ramo and Sibel’s (Cengiz’s daughter and Neco’s sister) love story. I’m sorry - I don’t care what excuse your lover gives you for killing your father - but it ain’t okay. The mafia plots are repetitive and the love story is cliche at its worse. 

So... let’s talk about the Lament of Neco

Neco is introduced, from the start, as spoilt rich boy player - who is only handsome, and doesn’t have the intelligence nor the cunningness to lead his mafia family. This is nicely shown through Ilhan Sen’s (Neco) acting and the dialogue that others have around him. 

We can see, in scenes, that Neco not only looks but feels out of place in mafia meetings. The way his father, mother, and sister talk and move is different from his. He is out of place and shocked when others (Ramo) include him in the conversation as the future heir of the empire. You can see his eagerness to prove himself, as it comes off sincere, optimistic and naive. The meeting scene is a great demonstration of Neco’s character and relationship with his family.

His father is in the middle. Neco’s sister is on the right side of her father - depicting how Cengiz sees his dauther as his right hand. The left said is Neco’s mother. The three are close and are able to have an intimate conversation. Neco is further away from them. Ramo is standing and his body is facing forward - talking to the three family members. He needs to turn to address Neco and include him in. No one else looks towards Neco. When Ramo mentions Neco being the head of the family, Boz (another goon) holds in a laughter. Neco is visible upset and gets up. 

One could see this as a childish gesture on Neco’s part, however, I saw it as a sign of Neco’s insecurities. Neco has been seen as inferior by his father, mother, and sister - all his family, who should be supporting and helping him, and whom he cannot fight against. But a servant is looking down at him.. Neco can’t stand that. This is not explained in words, I inferred all this from the scene and was happy that it was proven in later episodes - even if it was in direct exposition dialogue by Neco.

As revenge for laughing at him, Neco disrespects Boz in front of others - not only putting him in his place, but making Boz feel what Neco feels all the time. Boz then beats Neco up and runs. Neco was defeated by a servant. Neco’s dad wants Boz dead, and Ramo decides to save Boz and kill Cengiz. Neco, before so smug seeing Boz so close to death, runs away when he sees/hears gunshots - It’s almost comedic. They catch him, but Neco pleads and begs for his life. He tells Boz and Ramo that they can use him. This presents Neco as a coward juxtaposing him against the ‘awesome’ Ramo. 

Long story short, to end the warring families, Ramo has to marry Neco’s sister and Neco has to marry Ramo’s sister Fatos - who is in love with Boz. 

This is where I put my critical, feminist, and logical hat off and start dancing to the hymns of fangirling. I love this romantic trope in all it’s glory. You have:

enemies into lovers

constant bickering

forced marriage

co-habitation

badboy/plaer is in love and shows softer side/changes

love triangle

girl realising that difference between first love and true love.

I love it!

But they did my Neco dirty. And therefore my hat is back on.

Ramo, through it’s writing, has also ruined this for me. Remember, Neco is a minor character - so his and Fatos’s scenes are very minimal and not enough to exploit these tropes. 

Fatos and Neco, in my opinion, never bond. They never have moments were it allows them to fall for one another. There was one scene, which I believe is where Neco falls for Fatos, but Fatos’s character is so cold that I don’t understand how he fell in love. 

Before I discuss that underwhelming scene, let’s talk about the great scene that came before it. Neco’s grandfather takes him to an abandon place and makes him shoot a random guy - execution style. Granddad yells at Neco - pretty much saying ‘be a man’, ‘your sister has more balls than you’, ‘You will never kill Ramo and avenge your father’, ‘you’re worthless’. Again, the acting is better than the script. Neco’s face shows that these words are not  the first time he has heard them, but these words have also been constantly going through his head. Neco is also distressed at the act of killing a random guy - Neco isn’t a killer and, because of the family he’s in, that is connected to whether or not he is a strong man. 

I wish, I WISH this was explored more. Neco representing this idea/notion of masculinity and toxic attitudes of societal expectations. We see this earlier on, when Sibel is grieving over her dead father and Neco says that it’s worse for him because he saw it happen. She bitterly mentioned that he ran away like a coward and begged Ramo for his life. Neco, angrily, asks her what she would have done. She replies she would rather die than be a coward like him. This angers Neco. Again, moments like these allow us to sympathise with Neco and I wished we could explore not only that event from Neco’s point of view but also the relationship he had with his father..

Anyway, Neco - after killing the man (it seems) - comes home destroyed. He is physically shocked from the events. He goes to his room to find his ‘wife’ - both have been fighting up to this moment - and lies in her lap. She is shocked by his behaviour and actions. He begs her not leave. I have no major issues with this but one. Fatos needed to show a little more compassion or gesture for it to make sense that Neco is now in love with her. She doesn’t move as he lies in her lap. If she simply put her hand on his head or through his hair, and Neco took the simple platonic gesture as love - I would be here for it. But no.

And then this moment is ruined by other scenes. This will show my bias, because when a Neco scene is good - I give credit to the actor. And when a Neco scene is the worst - the writers are the victims of my anger. 

So, you know this character you’re going to fall in love with - against all attempts by other characters and writers to make you hate him - well... he is a rapist?

OMG! These sequence of events. So, Neco has killed a guy. He is upset and finds solace in Fatos. FLASHBACK! Remember the time that Neco was held at gunpoint because he was forcing himself on a girl who has said no? Sibel and Ramo come and Sibel slaps Neco - disgusted by her brother’s action. BTW Neco doesn’t feel guilty about his actions. Back to the present, he is now flirting with Fatos and pretty much telling her he wants to sleep with her. 

She is scared (remember she was forced into this marriage and loves another). He makes a move to kiss her and she slaps him. She is so scared she gets a gun and points it at him.

This is would have been amazing if done right!

Why it is bad? The audience was just shown a scene were an unremorseful Neco was held at gunpoint for trying to rape another girl. Therefore, this makes the audience, through the codes and convention of storytelling, think Neco is capable of doing the same thing to Fatos and makes Fatos decision and actions justified. This makes Neco, a character I enjoy and want to keeping enjoying, a ‘problematic’ character. This scene is an affirmation of Neco’s despicable acts. The flashback isn’t shown as a misreading of the events, it is shown as fact and this scene is shown as a confirmation. 

Could this be good? YES! Neco just had a traumatic experience. He had to shoot and kill someone. He struggled to do so and hasn’t gotten over it. Then he sees Fatos holding a gun at him. He, knowing how he felt, thinks she wouldn’t shoot because how could someone do that. But she does. This scene should be an exploration about human nature to shoot and kill someone. What goes through our head and how do we deal with it after. But atlas, she shoots him, he survives and this is barely talked about again because the main plot comes and rears its ugly head. 

What this scene could of been? When I saw this I thought about a similar scene from Siyah Beyaz Ask. Asli is forced to marry assassin Ferhat. Fearful, she keeps a knife under her pillow. When Ferhat, in anger, pushes her to the bed, she stabs him. Ferhat then challenges her to finish him off, Asli cries that she can’t and Ferhat has a lovely speech on what makes a murderer and how she is no different than him. These sequences is what, I believe, should have been produced between Neco and Fatos, minus the crying. 

So, elements that needed to go: rapey Neco. No one wants it nor needs it. The scene should have explored the characters. Neco inability to hurt others, and Fatos courage to protect herself against Neco. Like she is ‘powerless’ in front of other, or she can’t hurt any one else, except Neco. And I don’t know about you, but after trying to kill someone, there could be moments between the two characters to talk and heal one another. Maybe Fatos freaking out that she could pull the trigger. Neco being envy of her. So much CONFLICT!

Now let’s talk about NecFat. The ship that made me want to watch this series. I don’t know whether it is the subtitles or writing but... eh. Like the gifs, fanvids, and acting makes this look amazing and everything I need right now. But it is so poorly done. 

So, Fatos and Neco meet when Ramo, Fatos’s brother, keeps Neco as a hostage. She’s there to give him food and water. The two bicker and Neco asks her to do him a favour and at least call his mother who must be worried about him. We see Neco caring for his mother and Fatos feeling sympathy for him. This is their only scene as Boz doesn’t like the two meeting. In a funny scene, Fatos sarcastically tells Boz how handsome Neco is and what girl wouldn’t want to keep seeing him. She laughs and says she was joking, but - I think the lady protest too much. Off topic, I love how every character agrees that Neco is super good looking. Even when Neco is kidnap and looking in the mirror, the kidnapper is like ‘Hey Handsome, stop looking in the mirror’. Kidnapper has taste. 

Anyway, they needed more scenes with Neco as a prisoner and Fatos as the one who brings him food, maybe even bandage some wounds. As mentioned earlier, this show should have been about the never ending circle of revenge. Neco, while hostage, promises to kill Ramo. 

The show goes with the mafia/gangs saying the only way this feud will end is if  Ramo marries Sibel and Neco has to marries Fatos . Okay, so love the plot, not the execution. In the series, the two barely have any scenes until Fatos shoots him and then the families decide... ‘hey there this thing called... a divorce?’ And now the couple are separated. So, the show failed to take full advantages of the marriage plot. At the moment, up to Episode 11, Neco is in love with Fatos , she is pregnant with Boz’s child and has no feelings for Neco. Neco is obsessed with Fatos and his love comes off as childish and selfish. 

And that’s the thing, the actors and their chemistry is what is making NecFat, because the script and series give them nothing. I mean, Neco gets kidnapped and you think this would be a good moment for Fatos to be worried about Neco, but nope - nothing. She is in love with Boz and currently has no feelings for her husband. 

The last time we see them is when Neco, after putting doubts in Boz’s head about the father of Fatos’s unborn child, tells Fatos that Boz shouldn’t have asked the question about the paternity.  He says he would never had asked such a question. He tell her that he accepts her and is willing to do anything for her. His love is so big that he will look after both her and her unborn child. Neco states ‘you and the baby could be my family”.

Awww... I love this. This is an awesome moment - when isolated. Neco is in this 110%, while Fatos is not even on the same wavelength. So his declaration isn’t shown as earth shuttering to Fatos . That’s where we end with them. She isn’t seen reflecting on it and it doesn’t seem she will be Team Neco any time soon. Also, the episode/season ends with Neco setting a trap for Ramo so don’t think Fatos is jumping into Neco’s arm anytime soon.

If the series was called Neco.

This show would have been my jam if the whole Ramo/Sibel story was cut. Have Ramo already married - I don’t care. The first episodes ends with Ramo killing Neco’s father. Wow, a revenge story where the revenge has been accomplished. What’s next? 

NECO!

Now Neco - the coward, womanising, good-for-nothing, son must take his father’s place. Same as the original where he tries to run and gets caught. He gets bargained back by, now, the granddad. There is a scene, in the original, where Neco is at his father’s funeral and has his head down low. His grand-daddy reprimands him - saying he is now the head of the family and his head should be held high. Boy can’t even grieve at his own father’s funeral. Explore that!

Have the plot about ending the feud with marriage. Have Neco and Fatos against it. How can they marry into the family that killed their fathers? Also, have it that when Ramo finds out that Boz and Fatos are in love, Ramo makes Boz promise to let Fatos go. Pretty much a ‘you owe me for all the things I’ve done for you over the years.’ Fatos begs Boz to runaway with her, but he can’t go against Ramo. Boz chooses Ramo over Fatos . Fatos is heartbroken. This will also show Ramo as a complex character and allow Fatos to see the cracks in her relationship with Boz (which I will mention later). 

Also, Neco needs a sidepiece. Again, they say he is a player but we never see it. Have a sidepiece which he promises that won’t end because he is married. It will also give jealousy moments for Fatos. We see both characters coming into this marriage with no intention to fulfil it. Fatos is there to find out/spy if Neco’s family plans to attack, and Neco uses Fatos as a bullet proof vest, so Ramo won’t kill him.

So, like I mentioned about his conversation with Sibel about how he ran away -have the conversation with grand-daddy or mum, but then have Neco have nightmares about that day his dad died. In his dreams his father says Neco is the reason he died. If he was a better son, Boz wouldn’t have laughed, Neco wouldn’t have insulted Boz, Boz wouldn’t have beaten him up, and Ramo wouldn’t have killed Cengiz. He calls Neco a coward for running that day.

Pretty much, Neco subconsciously blames himself and believes by killing Ramo he will be the son his father needed. You could also have Ramo have similar dreams in the first episode with his father about getting revenge. This would show that the characters are haunted by their fathers and revenge.

When Neco and Fatos share a bedroom - obviously after bickering who has the bed. Fatos wakens up from the floor by Neco night terrors. He keeps saying ‘baba’ and ‘sorry’. Fatos , insensitive to Neco, wakes him up. Neco, trying to hide his insecurities leaves the room - instead sleeping on the couch in the living room or something. Fatos therefore gets to see a broken Neco and sees the consequences of revenge.

What I love about how Neco’s character is protrayed in the show is how awful he is as a gangster, but wants to prove he is capable. This needs to be explored more and should the basis of NecFat. 

Neco’s family, and society, expect him to be this masculine macho man, but the series presents him as this broken child, just wanting his family to say ‘I’m proud of you’. Neco has a desire to succeed where others say he would fail. And in the show he fails a lot. 

What I would love to see is him succeeding in something that is more ‘feminine’, in something that his family doesn’t recognise. I’m not trying to stereotype gender when I say feminine. In contrast, I want to see them challenge gender roles. So what do I mean by this? 

Like, have Neco have a hobbie that is incredible ‘unmasculine’ or just simply cute and adorable. A contrast to the ‘masculine macho man’ image he so wants to project. These could be writing poetry, painting, playing a classical instrument; but my personal favourite (I’ll explain why later) - baking. 

(Author’s Note: I’m ashamed/proud of the time I spent making the above image)

Maybe it is the fangirl in me, but I would love to see ‘badass’ Neco stress baking. But why do I think a hobbie is needed for Neco? It shows softer side to him, and that he is good at something. But his family had never supported him and instead puts a gun in his hand and forced him to kill someone. 

Also, this would allow an opportunity for a scene where Fatos smells something delicious and gets out of her room. She goes downstairs to see Neco stress baking - maybe he has gotten up from a nightmare or something. Fatos, realising it’s Neco goes back, but Neco tells her to eat something, because he’s going to throw it away anyway. While eating Neco’s baked goods (hehe...), Fatos and Neco converse - obviously ending in a fight. Fatos leaves. Neco leaves some baked goods at Fatos’s door and throws the rest away. 

Why is this important? Well, when Fatos goes back home, whenever she eats she thinks about Neco’s food. She misses it and you can have cute moments when Neco gifts her his baked goods. Also, there could be a moment where Fatos compliments him and either says “you’ve done good’ or ‘I’m proud of you’. Awwww... 

But the main reason is this...

Back to what actually is happening on the show. So, as mentioned earlier, the cracks in Fatos’s relationship with Boz. When the aunt finds about Boz and Fatos, Fatos says that, after Boz almost getting killed, she wants to marry him and have a safe life. The aunt says that can never happen. When you marry someone from this lifestyle, death is always lurking around. 

We see this come up later on when Fatos says to Boz that when they get married they can be a normal married couple. Boz says that this is normal for them. He will continue to risk his life but that they will continue to love each other until death does them part. Through these scenes we see that Fatos doesn’t want to marry into the life of crime. She wants a ‘cookie cutter’ marriage.

Therefore, Neco by not fulfilling his families wishes will actually be accepted by Fatos. While Neco doesn’t belong in the life of crime, Fatos doesn’t want to live in one. In short - they will leave the crime world and Neco can open a bakery in the country side, or something, with his wife. 

Pretty much, ‘Neco’ (if the show was called Neco) would go on a journey of Neco -  the coward, womanising, good-for-nothing gangster - trying to get revenge but realising that this revenge won’t end. His dad killed Ramo’s father, Ramo killed his dad, Neco killing Ramo would lead to someone killing him. Fatos, and their love, will show him he can be something else and that he chooses his destiny. 

Overall, Ramo isn’t a good show and I am way too obsessed of what this show could of been than what it is. Though I love the actors and NecFat, the chemistry is good and it is using one of my favourite tropes, the relationship is losing potential through bad writing and plotting. 

Don’t know when we will see this show back on air, but when we do, I hope NecFat becomes less ‘forced’ and more mutual.  

Thanks for reading another one of my rants! What did you think about Ramo and everything I have written. Let’s dicuss!

[a-tired-cryptid-talks-shit]

Sanders sides mimecraft/YouTuber au

Some basic info is missing but they all have roughly the same age/subscribers and stuff

Patton:

Collects EVERY animal and names them all . 'Teams up' with people a lot. Mainly makes funny and casual irl games and vlogs.  He can only really play mc well and never uses cheats  ("not the honest or hardworking thing to do!")  Always has a MASSIVE Base (mainly houses for his animals and farms so he can feed them all)  either dies every five minutes or never dies there's no in-between  (the more upset he is the more he dies normally)  has a new hair colour every month (definitely virgil's doing)  has a subscriber farm/ garden  and puts atleast 2 people in it each episode

Swears like sailor   when playing so he has really edited and almost never livestreams  when playing minecraft he does do lots of qna/ irl games on livestreams and sometimes convinces one of the others to join. Has a "not PG" playlist of collabs where he has a few swears and dirty jokes (normally from the others). Travels a lot and always has a bag of sweets (vegan and everything free so anyone can eat them)  incase he meets any fans when out.  Has and will spend hours collecting things for his friends if he hears them complain about how they can't find any insert item here or need a certain amount of it but can't get it.  He has a "drop off hut" at their spawn where everyone but him has a chest and he'll leave whatever they need  for them to pick up and occasionally he'll leave sweet notes in them too if he knows they're having a bad day.  Doesn't make serious videos often but will always speak out on other social media about current events (blm, lgbt shiz etc) and give his support and thoughts on it there are some issues he doesn't talk about for personal reasons tho.

Basic info... 22..... vvv gay.......  totally not crushing on remus..... trans dude.....  about 3/4 mil followers.

Logan:

Has a good sized Base and is focused on efficency and survival. Almost always streaming or filming. Has 2 pets à series (max.)  And the rest if the farm animals are definitely not pets (most have names and he refuses to kill them). Is practically a god by episode 5 so most of  the time he does stupid challenges and makes shops and trades/ helps  the others.  He only ever blogs for events (vidcon/comicon)  most of the time his camera is stolen by either remus, patton or Roman and they'll make sure to get all the funny and embarrassing moments on film.  Logan always réalisés two videos for each event eg :  video one: "Vidcon 2020 day 2"   video two: " Vidcon 2020 day 2 patton's  cut" (where all the shenanigans and  weird shit is posted).

He's always a sarcastic mum (so normal )  and loves to watch the playful banter and whenever any of the viewers see it he'll be spammed with edits and art for the next month or two. Of course he goes through everything he's tagged in and makes sure to like and comment. Because it's logan everyone still simps for  him and he posts photos a lot  and lots of group photos from when they all meet up and shiz  and most of the comments are people drooling over him.

Has a playlist of info videos where he talks about social justice stuff and is super supportive and informative about it and almost always gets someone he knows and is affected by it to talk to and make sure he's doing it the right way and he has all kinds of channels linked that talk about it all in more depth and always links petitions and places to learn and donate.

Basic info:  24... gay ..... abt 3/4 million subscribers... in a relationship with virgil  but only the group know about it.

Roman:

Roman asks his subscribers every series for a theme (pirates, Princes,  mediaval, fairies etc) each series which he has to stick to

Always over the top and dramatic

Livestrwams once a week (mainly mining) and he has a few hours where he'll do song requests and they call it radio time and occasionally he'll get his bf or whoever's home to do lives with him and they'll do qnas and shiz abd sometimes do mini versions of tags abd shiz

Merch galore he has merch for every series (they're vvv long) tries to get fans to design them and uses underground artists

So many collabs

Lots of people think he has tattoos he sometimes tries to cover when really it's doodles that were done in sharpie and still haven't come off.

Shipped with EVERYONE and often has to make posts saying "I love y'alls creativity but all my friends are in relationships and please do not ship us because it makes it very uncomfortable and awkward."

Makes  so many vlogs and is always doing something new and interesting.

Has the most extra and intricate bases and all kinds of weird pets and he changes his skin for each series.

Remus:

No one remembers adding him to the servers or anything but he's just there.

Normally shares a base with patton or is super close to it and basically has a house with a lava moat and a basement abd that's it. So many swears and dirty jokes.  Lots of random short vlogs that he has in a playlist that's called 'why I love these dumbasses'. Constantly flirts with patton and when they start dating publicly they do all kinds of tags and have a mc world together where everyone thinks they'll be sweet and wholesome but most of it is them killing eachother for the fun of it which everyone is mad for.

Remus always challenges patton to find a super rare pet (jokes on you remus patton has every pet in the game by episode 5)  for filler videos where they don't know what to do. Remus does lots of trolling and making traps/ death houses videos and mainly plays on servers or plays other games (mainly horror). Always ends up pissing someone on the server off and starting a war (they all know it's all in good fun) and spends wayyyyy too long working on different pranks for different people (He once made logan's house neon pink by hand)

Janus is pretty normal and will play with mods so he can get reptiles as pets. Is barely ever on servers and will barely play on them if he's part of one. He does lots of one off challenges / games with the others. Doesn't post anything but gaming vids and only ever does voice-over and no cam for a long time and is shipped  with everyone  he had every social media but only posts about upcoming videos and events. Lowest subs of the group as he doesn't do it for the income (unlike most of the others)  and just does it because the others convinced him. He keeps his home life secret until he accidentally turned up in the background of one of Remy's videos and everyone went mad with theories and he came out and explained it all so after tgat he occasionally posts vlogs for big events but that's it. He lives with emile and remy in a 2 bed apartment (they were previously roomates) and has his own room which is really an office with a spare bed in it.

Virgil :

Mainly does series on his own or speed running /parkour.  He's weirdly good at building so he has a series where he builds houses for his friends. He does a mixture of  art and gaming videos when he does collab with the others it's always one off games against eachother (bedwars parkour etc)  he almost always wins (his only real competiton is logan) and stays silent most the time   and only really throws around insults.

Remy (+emile)

Lifestyle  and challenge blogs doesn't game but he has tried a few times on janus' channel (so has emile)  he has a playlist  of mental health videos made by emile (He's still a therapist but he wanted a way to help people further so he does these with remy)  and occasionally does makeup / fashion videos and is a super super popular channel so his bfs  (janus and emile) don't really need to work but they like to contribute.

[wayward-wren]

Alright I’m losing my mind how do u feel about infodumping this new thing you’re watching bc ily and want to know what you’re talking about XD

Oh boy oh boy anon, have you opened the flood gates. *cracks knuckles* I’m always down to info dump. (gets kind long so i’m putting a cut in)

The Dream SMP is a Minecraft multiplayer server owned by Dream, and most of the stuff happens over on live streams on twitch. Some content creators post highlight videos on their youtube channels, which was how I started, but it doesn’t quite fully catch the whole story and nuances (that being said I’d recommend TommyInnit, Wilbur Soot or Technoblade as a good place to get started, they all have youtube playlists on their channels)

The server starts off like a normal survival server, but then TommyInnit joins and starts stirring up trouble. This sparks off the disc war (fighting over Tommy’s most prized possessions on the server (keep that in mind) a couple of discs he’s managed to get (Cat and Mellohi most importantly)) and the pet war (Between Tommy and Sapnap, involving a lot of animal deaths, including Tommy’s cow Henry). I’m a little unclear on the early days of the server, cos I’ve only seen a few youtube highlights, but that’s the gist of it. 

Then Wilbur Soot joins the server. With Tommy, Tommy’s friend Tubbo, Eret and Fundy (who is Wilbur’s son and also a fox in lore), they create a new country of L’manburg, declaring independence from the rest of the server.  Dream, the owner of the server, doesn’t like this idea and it sparks the first war - the battle for independence. After fighting, a betrayal which still hangs over the heads of everyone even now, and a whole lot of tnt, Tommy challenges Dream to a 1v1 duel for independence. He loses, but sacrifices both his prized discs to Dream, securing L’manberg’s independence. 

There’s a time of peace, other characters like Niki join L’manburg and then Wilbur announces an election because he wasn’t democratically elected and wanted to secure that power. They tell Quackity - another member of the SMP who isn’t allowed in L’manburg because he’s not European and L’manberg is for Europeans only - and he decides he’s running as well. 

A last-minute entry from JSchlatt and a party alliance between Quackity and Schlatt meant that Schlatt barely won the election. Schatt’s first decree is to exile Tommy and Wilbur, and they’re chased out of L’manburg by a rain of arrows. The walls are torn down, the flag burned by Fundy and a new flag erected and L’manberg is renamed Manberg. 

Tommy and Wilbur find shelter in an underground canyon they name Pogtopia, Tubbo is left behind and recruited to be a mole/spy for them and they call in the help of an old friend - Technoblade. 

(An aside here, Techno, Tommy, Wilbur and another Minecraft youtube - Philza - have a group dynamic called the Sleepy Boys Incorporated. Lots of people headcanon them as a family, with Phil being the father and the others being brothers, but I like Phil being Wilbur’s father, Tommy being adopted/just showing up and they can’t get rid of him, and Techno being an old friend of Phil’s who’s about Wilbur’s age)

Schlatt announces a Festival. Tubbo is in charge of decorations for it and is also giving a speech. On the way back after spying on the announcement, Wilbur turns to Tommy and asks if they’re being the bad guys. He then announces “let’s be the badguys” and despite Tommy’s protests, gets a Whole Lotta TnT of Dream. 

The day of the festival arrives - Wilbur has rigged the entirety of Manburg with tnt. Wilbur and Tommy spy on the festivals while Techno who was invited joins in. Then, after Tubbo’s speech - which is going to be the cue to explode it all - things start to go wrong. Schlatt and Quackity trap Tubbo in a box, and Techno is called up to execute him because Schlatt figured out he was a mole. 

Techno does because of mild peer pressure, Wilbur goes to find the button but can’t, Techno goes on a rampage and murders a whole bunch of people, and Tommy is Upset. Back at Pogtopia he challenges Techno to a 1v1 fist fight which he loses (dude has not won a single 1v1)

Tubbo is now with Pogtopia, having lost the second of his three canon lives (as have Tommy and Wilbur at different points). Fundy reveals himself to be a spy for Pogtopia (though Wilbur still calls him his ‘traitor son’ and ‘look my son who I despise”), and Dream announces that there’s a traitor in their midst. A date is set for the final war. 

The day arrives. There are 11 and a half stacks of tnt under Manberg. Techno shows the team his underground bunker and they all gear up. After a battle, Dream announces that they want to surrender, and shows them Schlatt, who dies to a very anticlimatic heart attack. 

Wilbur appoints Tommy president, who declines and Tubbo becomes president instead. Then Wilbur slips off to the button room, saying that the thing he built the country for no longer exists (turns out he’s the traitor). 

Then Philza, who had previously not been whitelisted, joins the server directly behind Wilbur and at the same moment, Techno shoots Tubbo, announcing that despite constantly saying he was fighting against government he’d been betrayed by them setting up a government right in front of him. Everyone starts fighting while Phil tries to talk Wilbur down. Wilbur doesn’t listen, hits the button, blows up Manberg and then asks Phil to kill him. Phil does, (somewhat reluctantly “you’re my son!”) and then rushes down to help the others fight the two withers that Techno just spawned. 

In the aftermath, New L’manberg rises with Tubbo as president. Techno goes into retirement and Wilbur comes back as Ghostbur - who is extremely wholesome and has a bad memory, cos he’s not able to remember anything bad. There’s a stretch of peace, in which Ranboo joins the server, Ghostbur, Fundy and Phil have some family bonding, Ghostbur hands out blue which apparently sucks up sadness, and some side plots happen. 

Then Tommy and Ranboo burn down the house of the current king of the smp and Dream takes his chance. Through various manipulations, threats, and forcing people into situations they don’t want to be from Dream, Tubbo exiles Tommy.  

Tommy has a Hard Time in exile with Dream heavily manipulating him, to the point where he’s staring longingly at lava in the nether and being a shell of himself. Ghostbur hangs out with him for a bit (giving him and tubbo both compasses that point to each other) but just vanishes one day, leaving tommy completely alone with Dream. (it’s later revealed that Dream sent him off to wander in the snow - and turns out snow and rain melts him. He also finds a blue sheep who he calls Friend)

 New L’manberg is rotting from the inside, Tubbo bowing more and more to the pressures of his new role and becoming more corrupt. He and his cabinet (Fundy and Quackity and Ranboo is there as well) put Phil under house arrest while trying to track down Techno to kill him. 

Dream pushes a little too hard with Tommy, and Tommy towers high into the sky, realizes Dream was never his friend and leaves, finding shelter under Techno’s house. 

The butcher army (Tubbo, Fundy, Quackity and Ranboo’s there too) capture Techno by holding his horse hostage and try to execute him, but he escapes with the help of Dream (which will come back because Techno now owes him a favour) and goes back home to find a feral Tommy living like a raccoon in his basement. Tubbo then goes to visit Tommy, only to find a creator where Dream blew everything up, and a tower reaching into the sky, with no sign of Tommy. He assumes Tommy is dead. 

Techno and Tommy have been hanging out together, Tommy wanting to get his discs back (Tubbo having one he gave him as a symbol of trust and Dream having the other, but Techno wants to destroy L’manberg and the government) Tommy is slowly building up his confidence and sneaking back into L’manberg. Techno rescued Phil from his house arrest. Tubbo has been burying himself in projects and being mostly ooc which I translate to ‘my best friend just died and it’s partly my fault so I'm gonna go make a guardian farm and Not Think About That.’ Ranboo is the only one with any sense and can see that Dream is holding all the streams and that people shouldn’t be fighting, but working together to defeat him. He’s technically part of L’manberg, but he’s been hanging out with Techno and Tommy a fair bit. 

And Dream commissioned a prison that is going to be completely inescapable. Like, completely. Like, the creator of the prison died and respawned inside it at one point and said it’d take him an hour to get out and he knows how it works and had to be teleported out. Like, this thing will send texts to the guards’ phones if a block is broken. We have no idea what it’s for and we are afraid. 

In today’s stream, Tommy and Techno hold someone hostage in an effort to get Techno’s weapons back, Tommy and Tubbo properly see each other for the first time and get into a bit of a fight, Techno starts to slowly turn Tommy against Tubbo/the government and Tommy faces off with Dream, gaining enough confidence to cuss him out. 

And that’s basically where we’re at now. This is a very rough outline of what happens, and I’ve left out most of the more cursed lore (Wilbur has fun) and a lot of the side plots (like the Crimson egg that’s been spreading, and El Rapids). If you wanna know more i’m down to info dump more and can provide you with links. 

Also, real quick, check out the animatics! SAD-ist has some amazing ones, as does Late-August, The Channel Without a Name and a WHOLE lot of other’s whose names I forget. Honestly just search ‘dream smp animatic’ and spend a couple hours looking through them they’re AMAZING. I can provide you with links of those as well!

[kylo-but-not-to-me-ren]

Thoughts on The Rise of Skywalker

Just a disclaimer that this post contains TROS spoilers 

Hi there, it’s me again sharing my views on the latest Star Wars as a Reylo, fan and former film student (the latter may show at some point but it’s mostly a fan view). 

I had pretty high expectations for this movie and I was not not happy leaving the screening, but I had some things that I thought would go down differently so here’s what I think. 

Rey

I really like how organic Rey and Kylo’s connection and intimacy is portrayed in The Last Jedi, and J.J. expanded a bit on that which I think it’s very nice (and apparently they can teleport things via ForceSkype now which is an interesting take but I understand the reasoning). 

One thing that I didn’t really like is that Rey is a Palpatine. I’ve seen one theory on this and it makes sense now, yet I was a great supporter of the theory that Rey was really a nobody, that she came from nothing like Kylo said. She could’ve been just like Anakin who didn’t have either Jedi nor Sith ancestors. 

On a more positive note, Rey’s conflict with herself is an ongoing theme in this trilogy and I believe it was really well developed and has come to a satisfying conclusion. I felt like she was a bit lost in the beginning and I thought it was going to be an issue later on but thankfully it got better before it was too late. 

Also Rey is so goddamn powerful and strong with the Force I love her so much.

When Rey and Kylo are battling in the old Death Star and she stabs him with his own lightsaber but then she feels Leia’s gone and immediately realises what she has done and without second thought she kneels to heal Ben crying. My heart exploded I felt so many things at once I can’t explain. 

“I wanted to take your hand. Ben’s hand.” hsdcsgfyufgyufgeryfcgeif i died. 

The ForceSkype teleporting feature I ALMOST FAINTED BECAUSE I GENUINELY THOUGHT SHE WAS GOING TO KILL BEN INSTEAD OF PAPLS WHEN THEY EXCHANGED LOOKS I WAS SO RELIEVED AND HAPPY WHEN SHE GAVE HIM ANI’S BLUE LIGHTSABER. 

DARK REY WITH HER DOUBLE RED LIGHTSABER. 

THAT YELLOW LIGHTSABER. I WANT IT. NOW. 

Also maybe that “I am all the Jedi” line is a nudge to Avengers: Endgame? (*cof* hi Disney *cof*) 

Kylo Ren/Ben Solo 

Next up is ma boi Kylo Ben, who has been my favourite character this whole trilogy and hell Adam Driver portrayed him so wonderfully. In TLJ he grew so much as a character, not only as a villain but a person who went through a lot, has an abusive master and is constantly being haunted by the guilt of killing his father. 

To start this off, I want to talk about those first scenes. OH MY GOD KYLO TAKING ALL THOSE PEOPLE IN THE FOREST IN SLOW MOTION AND HIS SOLO JOURNEY TO EXEGOL. After that I got mad at Palps when one of his first lines was “I have been every voice you have ever heard inside your head” because it means Ben has been manipulated his whole life and didn’t really have a choice other than turn to the dark side. 

Kylo’s arc is by far my favourite and in my (completely biased) opinion the best written one. When he’s introduced in TFA, he’s a promise of a new Vader but he’s not quite there yet. Kylo has conflict inside him, a spark of light still, and to put out that spark once and for all he’s instructed by his master to kill Han Solo, but as we’ve seen it has “split his spirit to the bone”, to quote Snoke. 

Later on in TLJ when the ForceSkype starts we begin to see more of Kylo’s vulnerable side, specially when Rey is talking to him in the hut. Kylo takes his fcking glove off to take Rey’s hand and that’s when Reylo became canon and you can’t change my mind. 

Fast forward to TROS, Kylo is already the Supreme Leader and he’s as strong as Rey (but most likely more skilled because he had extensive training while Rey had only a few lessons and read some books?) and they are Force Dyads which makes them absurdly powerful together. 

One thing I noticed is that every time Rey and Kylo claim to have seen the future both of them are always on the same side, either Dark or Light, but always together. They’ve never mentioned a future where they are apart and/or on different sides. *all the Reylo feels*

Then when both are battling in the old Death Star and Rey stabs him but heals him shortly after and Ben is ready to let Kylo Ren die to become Ben Solo again is brilliant. And that dialog with Han made me shed a tear or two. (a random side note is that I got a tiny bit upset when he threw his lightsaber away because his lightsaber is so cool and I just got one myself but I absolutely understand the need to get rid of it). 

I WAS SO HAPPY WHEN MY BABY BEN SOLO BURST INTO PALPATINE’S CHAMBERS (?) WITH ONLY A BLASTER AND LOOKED SO GOOD. Also I almost cried when he took the blue saber and beat the shit out of the Knights of Ren. 

LITERALLY THE RISE OF SKYWALKER. 

BEN HUGGING REY’S BODY RIGHT BEFORE RESURRECTING HER. 

“Ben”

THE KISS. THAT SMILE.

BEN SOLO DESERVED BETTER. 

And yes, I believe Ben Solo isn’t truly dead and Rey can help him come back and they can live happily like they deserve to be. 

Thank you Adam Driver for being the highlight of this movie (and dare I say, trilogy) and bless us with amazing acting. 

Poe Dameron 

I love Poe, he’s great and I loved that they gave him more screen time and I get they were trying to build another trio like in the OT but maybe making Poe, who was already a great pilot like Han also be a former (spice) smuggler is a bit much? We could use new characters and it’s okay if you wanna recycle the idea but please don’t make them identical. 

Another very important point is why do you need to make up a female love interest for Poe when there’s clearly one already? During the whole movie I felt a sexual tension between Finn and Poe just not to have them together in the end, I was very disappointed. MAKE STORMPILOT CANON YOU COWARDS. 

Finn 

To be honest, Finn is not one of my favourite characters and I believe it’s mostly due to poor writing. Finn is a great character and had so much potential being a deserter of the First Order but his arc wasn’t so well developed in the trilogy as a whole and one of the arcs I least enjoyed in TLJ was Finn and Rose’s adventure in Canto Bight. It all felt like a distraction even though they were doing something seemingly important but failed at the end. 

In TROS, Finn finds a group of other Stormtrooper deserters and I thought maybe it’d push his storyline forward but not so much. I was a bit disappointed but there were also lots of other things happening that I didn’t pay much attention to Finn, one of the reasons being that I already didn’t care much about him before so now it was kind of meh. 

I said it before and I’ll say it again, MAKE STORMPILOT CANON. 

A positive thing on Finn is that now they explored how Finn is Force-sensitive and now he finally realised he doesn’t need to run away and is willing to fight. 

Rose Tico

As I’ve mentioned before, her arc with Finn wasn’t my favourite in TLJ but that’s okay because you can’t make everyone happy all the time, yet I saw many people complaining about her character and even Kelly was attacked that she left social media. And now there were so many complaints that they decided to basically ignore Rose and she’s in like three scenes. 

I don’t think they even gave a plausible explanation why Rose couldn’t come along with Finn, Poe and Rey other than the fans didn’t like her character and they were trying to recreate the original trio. 

General Hux

Well, to be honest I was almost certain he would die at some point but killing him off like that? He deserved a bit of dignity. But his scenes were funny, which I’m not sure if it’s good or bad because he’s a First Order general so... he’s supposed to be more serious, I guess? 

As weird as it is, I kinda get his motives for being the spy, to see Kylo Ren fall so he could ascend to the Supreme Leader position, but things didn’t work out but at least we got a bit of that Kylux tension, right? *sigh* 

Knights of Ren 

One of my great disappointments of this movie.

They didn’t say a word, were only referred as murderers (not sure about the word exactly but it was something like that), had a couple of fight scenes and died. I wish they made an appearance in TLJ but they were only mentioned in Rey’s vision and Snoke mentioned them once but that was it.

They had some really impressive costumes and weapons, though. 

Overall a great movie, lots of nostalgia, would recommend.

So there it is, my thoughts on The Rise of Skywalker after watching it for the first time. Please feel free to share your thoughts as well and let’s talk :)