#but i just didn't want to and now it's almost 5 and the landlord will be home soon

[army-of-bee-assassins]

god i wish i didn't have some weird fucking kitchen anxiety where i can't cook dinner unless i'm home alone. normally i can meal prep in the afternoon when my landlord/housemate is at work but she's had a friend staying with us for almost two weeks (!) now who is here at literally all times. and i need to cook food to eat for dinner but i don't want to i don't want to i don't want to

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for leaving passive aggressive windshield notes?

I'm definitely a bit of an asshole here lol but let's see what tumblr thinks!

I (21, gender unimportant) live in a small building with only a couple units and four parking spaces on a dirt lot behind the building. I know for a fact that only 4 parking passes have been given out by the landlord (one of which is mine). I keep my parking pass on my rearview mirror literally at all times.

One night I came home from work really late, and there were already 4 cars parked in the lot! Technically, the lot has space for 5, so I just managed to squeeze in, but I was pissed bc people tend to park like assholes because there's no lines and I almost didn't have a spot to park for the night! I write a passive aggressive note about how these spaces are for residents only and they need them and leave it on the car without a pass.

Two days later that car magically has a pass on its rearview mirror. I do not know where the owner got it. My current theory is that people have been switching the passes between cars.

A couple days after, that there are TWO CARS (two different cars, by the way) parked in the lot without passes. It is night and dark, but I looked really carefully for a pass on either rearview mirror and see none, so I write two more identical notes and leave it on the windshields. I feel extra angry about this because in my mind, me, another car with a pass, and these two other cars were all parked there, meaning that if the two other tennants came home there would not be a spot for the 6th person and they would have to call a tow which is a massive hassle and unfun, especially at night.

The next day I'm in my apartment and I get a knock on the door and it's another resident, a person about my age, gender also unimportant. they ask me if I was the one leaving the notes and I said no. obviously an asshole move but I didn't want them to be angry with me. I fein innocence and they repeat that they have a pass up (which, again, magically appeared since last night), and I do at one point say I have seen cars parked there without passes, and they agree that that has happened and their policy is to wait to call a tow until the next morning. then they leave. at this point I've decided no more notes. the only thing I'll do from now on is call a tow if I don't have a spot to park.

My roommate (20, gender unimportant) knows what I've been doing. They weren't home at the time the other resident came over, and as of me writing this, it just happened so I haven't had a chance to talk to them yet. I plan on telling them what happened and that I don't plan to leave any more notes. This will inevitably lead to me asking them to back up my lie in case anyone asks them about it, which I do feel bad about. Hopefully nothing else happens now that the notes stop. The others in the building may suspect it was me but I don't exactly see what recourse they could have.

The main thing that irks me is that people are taking their passes down and not putting them back up. How am I supposed to know they're a resident? You'd think it'd only be 3 other cars for me to memorize, but like I said the cars that have been parked back there with the passes have changed in the past couple of months since I started living here. That's my defense if anyone suspects me I guess. Leave your pass up.

I guess my main question for tumblr is: JAH or YTA?

What are these acronyms?

[doumadono]

EMERGENCY REQUEST

So I love your stuff and ofc take your time. Im really sorry to inconvenience you with this request but I'm just very stressed.

I recently moved into a new house with my family and we have been slowly moving things in for months. Apparently the landlord left the door unlocked after he came in to make some final repairs and someone broke in and stole some stuff. Nothing huge, some tools, a toaster oven, drill bits. We didn't think they stole anything else and my family didn't see a reason to make a report till I started looking for one of my boxes I moved previously and it was gone. It had all my cross country stuff in it and I know it's not important to anyone else but CC is my LIFE. I've been running for almost 5 years So all my medals, plaques, times, banners, numbers, memorabilia from courses are gone. And I don't know what anyone would want with any of it. None of it was worth any kind of money but all of it means so much to me emotionally. I SUCKED my first year and it took so much effort to EARN everything. I'm scared they are gonna start melting down my metals or try to pawn them. I know it sounds vain and maybe it is but I was so proud of everything I've accomplished in cross country. I had a mental break down for about 30 mins to an hour and idk what to do. CC helped motivate me to recover from my Annorexia and one of those metals I won right after I got out of the hospital. Im 4'10 (I am a senior in highschool) Im already at a disadvantage considering my legs are half the size of everyone else's. I had to work so hard to be where I am now and all my reward for my work it's just gone because someone was bored? Wanted to make some extra cash?

Do you think If/when you have time you could write MHA comforting someone who's going through this? Maybe Shoji or Amajiki? Or whoever you want and think would fit. Im sorry again I know it's vain to want all of it back but it just meant so much to me.

Shoji & Amajiki with a friend who lost their CC stuff

EMERGENCY REQS MASTERLIST

Shoji

Shoji, noticing your distress, approaches quietly, acknowledging the pain without pressing for words.

With his calm demeanor, he approaches the friend, his extra limbs extending to offer a gentle, reassuring touch.

He speaks gently, "I heard what happened. I can't imagine how hard this must be for you. Take your time, but if you want to talk, I'm here."

Shoji respects your initial silence, patiently waiting for you to open up when you're ready.

He remarks, "Your achievements in cross country are a part of who you are. Losing them is like losing a piece of yourself, I bet but you still have the memories."

Shoji invites the friend to a quiet spot in the school, away from prying eyes, where they can share their feelings without judgment. "Sometimes, finding solace in silence can be more comforting than words."

Shoji suggests, "Let's work on a plan together. We'll search for your items and, if needed, involve our friends for more support. Even if the physical items are gone, your achievements and the strength you gained through cross country remain."

Amajiki

Amajiki cautiously approaches, "I heard about what happened. It's okay if you don't want to talk, but I'm here for you."

Amajiki silently sits with you, understanding that words may not be enough to express the depth of your pain.

He softly says, "Your achievements are not just medals. They're a reflection of your strength and resilience. No one can take that away."

Amajiki's gentle demeanor encourages the distressed friend to open up slowly, sharing the pain and memories associated with the lost stuff.

Amajiki softly suggests involving the authorities, realizing the emotional value of the stolen items. "I think it's important to let the authorities know. They might be able to help recover your belongings, and it's okay to ask for help."

Amajiki spends quiet moments with the distressed friend, acknowledging that sometimes, silent companionship speaks louder than words.

[yeehawkins]

Ricki Tikki MacTavish

Back home for once, Soap brings Ghost over to his flat. A small visitor awaits them

Coming home is an exceptionally rare luxury. And an even more rare occurrence is Simon Riley actually having any time away from the field. Johnny wanted to seize his chance to get to know the other more. Plus, he knows Ghost has nowhere to go, so it was only right to invite him over to his place. Really, it was more of a plead than an invitation, as old habits rarely die with that man. 

As they approach the apartment door, Soap pulls out a monstrosity of keys.

"How many fucking flats do you own?" Ghost states in astonishment.

"Just the one,'' Soap responds.

“Going to be here for ages trying to get into it.” Ghost states, rolling his eyes.

“Have a little faith.” Soap grins, almost magically flipping to the correct key with one cacophony of jingling, shaking it some more in triumph.

A little more jangling of keys, and Soap unlocks the apartment door, gesturing for Ghost to go ahead.

Ghost couldn't help but gawk upon entering. A few stains on the carpet notwithstanding, the place was downright pristine.

After tossing his bags by the door, Soap takes a look at his welcome guest.

"What? Never seen a clean flat before?" Soap teased.

"Well I certainly didn't expect one from you" Ghost retorted.

"Think I got the name by being filthy?"

"Oh I know where you got the name, slippery bastard" Ghost lets out a guffaw then picks up the shorter Scot, scooping him up in a hug. This knocks the air out of Soap a bit, and gets him blushing.

"Easy with the goods!" he laughs.

"That was easy"

Their banter is cut short, as there was someone else in the apartment. Ghost puts down his friend, and turns around. A small, fluffy tabby cat has made its presence known. The cat is quite loud, and continues to meow until Soap leans over to acknowledge her. He immediately melts at the sight of his beloved cat, scooping her up in his arms.

"Ricki! Oooh I've missed the hell out of you! My wee lady hold down the fort alright? Not give Ms. Darcy any trouble, did ya?"

Ghost watches as Soap devolves into a babbling Scottish mess at this cat. He lets out a chuckle, almost endeared at the display. "Didn't tell me you had a missus."

"Ah Ms. Darcy's just my landlord. Takes care of Ricki when I’m gone," says Soap.

"I mean the cat, MacTavish."

Snapping a bit out of his loving stupor, Soap tucks Ricki under his arm like a football. "This here's Ricki. My gran couldn't resist her face, but her allergies certainly could. So I took her in," He pauses to scritch the top of the cat's head with his other hand.

Ghost gives a genuine smile. His eyes go between Soap and Ricki, and raises his eyebrows at the man, clearly asking a question.

“Go ahead. Unlike me, she doesn’t bite.” Soap smirks, now holding Ricki like a baby. 

Ghost almost seems apprehensive to pet the cat, not wanting to spook her. However as he moves his hand towards her, she pushes her face up to his hand, purring loudly. 

“Aww, looks like you’re allowed to stay,” says Soap.

“Didn’t know there’d be a test,” Ghost replies contently, with much of his focus now on the purring cat. “Good to know you’ve got someone looking out for you off the job”

"Aye, really we look out for each other.” Soap beams, using one of his hands to now rub the cat’s belly. “Ricki canny hear a thing. Deaf as all, but fuckin’ loud as all too. Wouldn’t have her any other way”

Ricki takes a gentle swat at Soap's hand, shooting him a look. Ghost retracts his to avoid being included in getting hit.

“Guess the welcome party’s over” Ghost jokes. 

Soap sets Ricki back down on the floor. She goes right back to meowing once on the floor, circling Soaps legs.

“I believe somebody’s hungry,” Soap states. 

Once he has a briefly clear path, he begins walking toward the kitchen, Ricki weaving in and out between each stride. He opens up a cabinet, and looks back over at Ghost.

“Well come have a sit, Simon. You’re allowed inside more than 5 feet, you know.” Soap hollered. 

Truthfully Simon was in a bit of a trance, never much of the social type and perfectly content just watching Johnny and his cat do their thing. Hearing his name definitely snapped him out of it though. He walks over to the large couch in the living room and sits, still watching the other man and the cat in the kitchen. 

Johnny takes out a small bag of cat food, but looks down and notices her bowl is still full. 

“Oh you cheeky shite!” he laughs, looking at the cat staring at him, bending over to scritch her head. She simply yells back. 

“Fine, fine, a treat for my girl,” Johnny happily sighs, putting away the cat food and grabbing a smaller bag. He pours out a few treats into his hand, which prompts her to spring up onto the counter, somehow getting even louder. 

Johnny waggles a finger in front of her like a dad. “Ah ah ah! You know the deal.” He then points downward. 

Simon’s eyes widened. Upon this gesture, Ricki sits down, still looking up at Johnny and yelling of course. Johnny laughs and hands her a treat, placing the rest down on the counter for her, which she happily eats. He then walks over to the couch to join his guest, who is not at all hiding his surprise at what he just saw.

“You trained a cat.” Simon states in shock.

“Yep.” Johnny responds matter-of-factly, leaning back on the couch and kicking his feet up on the coffee table.

“And I’m the one outta my mind for drinking bourbon?” Simon laughs.

“Yeeep.” Johnny replies in the exact same tone. The two then catch each other's eyes, and exchange laughs. They both settle even deeper into the couch and let out content sighs, Johnny leaning his head back and shutting his eyes with a smile on his face.

[kengan-daddies]

Hello I have read some of your works and would like to ask you, if you could write more about Rei Mikazuchi❤️❤️❤️. I think you are the only one that I have seen write about him🥲 Could you please write a SFW story, but please make it a happy ending.🥰

I know right!? Rei gets no love in the community, my boi is cute, hot, and sexy!! What more could we want in a character, aside from characterization.

Also, I'm so sorry, I feel like this has a hint of angst, but the ending wasn't Angst, and the story isn't exactly happy and fluffy, I feel like I failed but writing SFW for Rei is lowkey kind of hard, but I'll just keep trying with him until it finally happens!! When I do it, I'll tag you in it!! Because you deserve it!!

Love is what You Make It Rei Mikazuchi

Anime : Kengan Ashura Character : Rei Mikazuchi Warning : Mention of violence, sensitive topics, discussion of ideology, slight angst? SFW

Love is what You Make It Rei Mikazuchi

Love is what You Make It Rei Mikazuchi

Living is already hard, having to pay bills, and making sure you have enough for groceries, hygienic products, household products, and even a little treat for yourself, but like they always say " life is what you make it" , just like home. Living in your own place can be rough at times, having nosy neighbors that could be rude on top of it, a stingy landlord, DHA on your ass for the smallest of reports, bugs, piping, cracks, not enough space, or too much space, but home is what you make it.

If that's the case, then couldn't that go for love too? You choose who you love, but you can't choose 'what' you love. For example, you fall in love with a lair, but you'll never know that they're a liar until you're in too deep. That goes for thieves, killers, rapists, racists, sexists, homophobes, pedophiles, stalkers, and abusers, it applies to all of them. You can't just back out and say 'Let's break up, I never want to see you again.' after spending 5 years with a person, even 1 year is more than enough time to develop a bond that's almost inseparable.

Humans are social animals, we thrive in social activities, even those who say they don't still do. Watching TV is a form of social interaction, you're learning characters, developing feelings for the ones you like most or despise, and researching their real age and where they come from. Even just reading this now, is a form of social interaction. Another human wrote this, and you're deep into the stories that have been written on this blog, you may have even followed and are extremely pleased that there is another writer who writes for this fandom. Social interactions are everywhere you look. In a book, on TV, in your phone, or even in a picture.

It's hard to pull back, especially when you had learned that Rei was an assassin. You were angry, you felt betrayed, you felt underestimated in your loyalty. It was like he didn't trust you enough, but you were in too deep to tell him to 'never see me again.' You've met Rei for Rei. You've seen him laugh, you've seen him cry, sleep, eat, vulnerable, strong, and funny. You've seen him at his highest and at his lowest, so why didn't he trust you enough to let you know?... Fear, he was afraid that you'd reject him, call him a monster and a killer, which you wouldn't be wrong, but can a monster love like he does? Can a monster cry like he does? You'd think not.

You love Rei for Rei, and he loved you for you, you made a deal with him, that he can continue his job unless it's just evil people that he killed, but he couldn't agree to that, simply because evil people just don't exist in his eyes. "Everyone has a different point of view on life, you'd either die and let a starving child eat your last meal, you'd eat the meal and leave the child to starve, or you'd eat the child and save the food for later, there's no in-between. However. there is a fourth option, sharing the food, but one of you will still end up in the other's stomach in the end. Either way, you look at it, it's either evil or good. Or take this, you're about to be murdered, will you let the killer kill you? Or will you kill the killer? Either way, someone is dead, and there will still be a mother weeping over their dead child." That was Rei's point of view.

So, you decided that he'd stop killing instead, you wanted to argue with his logic, but no matter how you looked at it, it was the truth. He was so blunt about it, just like how blunt he is for his love for you. He wants you to be blunt, so you will, and you want him to stay. Knowing that he has spilled blood on his hands, knowing that he's destroyed families, you still wanted him... Suddenly his logic on life was staring you in the face. Cuddling up with Rei, holding him tight at night when he'd have nightmares, having breakfast with him, lunch, dinner, laughter, and dates... It was a part of Rei, it was a part of you.

It was what you guys did, it was all you guys could do because it was a strange romance, but whoever said that there was a guidebook to romance? It was what you make it, and honestly, you guys were doing a damn good job at it too.

[the-firebird69]

We do have a few more things to mention and they are as follows

-my son is not to be tortured and tormented it's obvious what happens the entire morlock race is almost gone and it's in there bothering us it hasn't done you any good you continue to do it you're just going to continue to lose everything you ever had including warlocks who will soon be out and it'll be much less of a headache his childish it's harassment abuse and your pain through the nose it's illegal and I'm bringing charges against everybody that's doing it and we mean everybody if you don't stop you're going to simply be dead you don't care about your life then you'll be dead they don't care about people who are trying to harm our son and us and you might harm him because he gets really angry he can't help it there's so many people bothering him I think it's funny to suggesting to stop are you trying to survive instead

-the other things that are happening do a lot of people harassing your son not just the three morons here his landlord is and his sister wife and other people associated with them they don't know the meaning of no they don't understand what they're doing wrong they don't understand who they are what they're doing all sorts of malarkey to jam up the airways without backup is in a lot of trouble and I start hearing something we're in trouble we can't stop them from doing it so he looked at who's doing it and why and how they're doing it and what for and we started to take them apart and I'll tell you what it's a harder job than I thought and it's one of their main focuses and it took forever for us to look at it and I don't like it it stinks there's something wrong with it but he says if it's a main focus and tons of people are doing it and we can't stop them then what are we going to do and of course they they supposedly twist their arm together the warlock because it's kind of in their nature to do that kind of thing let me know about that and we know about the parallel so I say this it's absolutely true that it stinks it reeks these people are too stupid to have around they made tons of them hoping for a mistake and our son and daughter said that a hundred times but there's way too many still there's like 1% of them on Earth or less or half that and there's too many they're blithering idiots because they don't know what they're doing in life at all and don't have any direction for real still so we are going after them tell him to take them down

-and another thing we want to eliminate them we're working at things the daily effort and he's getting injured still but he says these people are low level guteral mean people, yet we got furthermore didn't even says the max care about their lives and stuff so they're going to be hitting people and dying and it's going to be a pain like he is now but truthfully we need to stop these idiots and putting orders out now they're harassing us so much I can't get this out and yeah they're doing stuff to stop it

-there's a massive crowd of them at the border they need to be wiped out and they're doing it it takes too long it starts raining the fire long range and they can't be allowed near with long range so I'm suggesting a different motif for the defense of this area and they won't like it it causes problems

There are people at the gate but furthermore he wants to get it out so I'm saying seems go ahead and do stuff and then go ahead now she's going to check something

-they're 5 million people at the gate 7 million 20 octillion and have been taken down. It's an incident it's happened all day and screaming bloody murder cuz they can't get in here. We are taking them down as fast as we can I'm doing stuff to them make sure they won't come back.

-it's a huge number of people at the northern border and they are up there and they are making huge amount of noises in there up there saying things on the speaker it's obscene and it's a new thing and it's annoying it's a very loud speaker didn't sound travels I audibly can hear for 20 miles and there are people up there how many but it's their post so they keep hitting the loud speakers and it's about 5 octillion people and they said good going and you missed us so they wipe them out a few of them saying that's right that's what we want and they say they're running ammo down really we take yours so the guys say this we don't have any time for this tell him to shut up or else tell them to shut up or else they say or else what I don't know we bombed your house with you in it is that a good idea says no it's all too bad so it started hitting him and they're going oh gosh she's on their side instead of oh gee whiz why would that be. So the complete failures and they admitted and they die and they keep coming cuz they're idiots there's a ton of these idiots all over the damn place our estimates are accurate and we use a computer but wow these people stupid

-other developments the west side of Florida is teaming with idiots and they come from all over the place and they could not hold them off we are having a problem with it too many come in Miami and the people have to let them go or they get hurt and we have to close it off at Miami and the ports and we're having trouble doing that those are trying to get stuff in here and they race in with the boats as we get stuff in here basically we have to give our stuff and escort and we have to have several push them out of the way so we see what he's saying that's what we have to do and other places won't have that luxury but not necessarily true just use ships and keep them the hell out are you ships and go after them all day and all night and we have to start doing that we have a huge number of Navy vessels now and we're doing it

-we also have a reason to recruit this place is abysmal we need more troops and he's right and we're recruiting like madness and we've got to draft out no but we're using conscription and his idea for two years service and it's going ahead right now it has to that's that's terrible we're getting ourselves in trouble and our people are probably responsible and we have to let them know that they're responsible to sign up for our military they're told to by me and Olympus and Thor and Freya on many occasions and they're ignoring us this is not the same societies here and I didn't expect this so they're going to them now

-there's a huge number of people making stupid noises okay he's going on and saying we should continue and we will I'm assigning people I'm assigning a lot more they flooded in we need to flood in and get them out of here I'm going to do that right now and I'm going to go for a break

Thor friend

We'll fix the verbiage Hera Olympus I'm tired of this already we're sending him a lot more we need to know other Ariana we need more bases we need huge ones and we need them now and we're sending those too and we need to take over the Midwest completely and I want to kick him out can't let them sit there and read stuff and but we have a plan I guess I'm sorry but proceeding now

[pisceanvixen]

YOKO - Part 1 (Drummer Boy & I)

I want to post about something that I have been suffering the repercussions with for quite some time now. And it's not because I feel any guilt within myself about my decision, but because others felt (and still do) the need to make me suffer for my apparent mistake. However, before I dive into this very personal, yet public story of mine. I would like to give some background on my relationship with my ex boyfriend and the start of my relationship with my husband, Avery. So, let's just call my ex boyfriend Drummer boy (for shits and giggles).

DRUMMER BOY & I **TRIGGER WARNING: R*PE & S*XUAL ASSAULT**

The drummer and I have been dating for about 5 years up until that point. I guess you can kind of say he was my high school boyfriend, although we only got together literally a little bit before graduation day. He proposed to me only after months of being together (to which some claimed I had forced him, but if I'm being honest, every boyfriend I was with ended up proposing to me on their own accord. And I was stupid enough to say yes every time, excluding Avery). I'm not going to deny the fact that our relationship was toxic. We were both struggling on how to navigate through life with our own personal traumas, let alone deal with one another. At the age of 18 years old, shortly after I graduated, I was kicked out of my home. Drummer boy's family kindly took me into their one bedroom apartment, where him and I shared a tiny sliver of a room (they literally put up a board to create it into a room). It was about the size of a walk- in closet where we shared a rugged twin bed. My ex was not the cleanest of the bunch. I felt like he wanted to live out what he considered to be a "punk" lifestyle by literally living in ankle deep trash. There were cigarette butts, ash, candy wrappers, used condoms (that weren't technically mine), dirty laundry, old notebooks, and other miscellaneous items scattered across our floor. But, I loved the dude. So, I didn't necessarily mind it right away.

Eventually, my smart mouth got us kicked out of the apartment once the landlord realized his family was letting us stay in the living room. And through all of MY hard work, I got us an apartment of our own. The drummer always had a hard time keeping a job. He went through them as fast as he went through his Marlboro cigarettes. It was his inability to wake up for work that eventually every job would fire him for. Now, I'm not one to make anybody conform to the stressful environments of any corporate company...but, when your girlfriend is working her ass off to keep you afloat, I'd at least think you'd try and find a job you can temporarily tolerate until better circumstances come along. By this point, I got fired from my job (for a reason I will explain later on in this blog), but luckily I found another job working for Porto's Bakery. I was the only manager of my section and if you have ever been there, you would understand that this was an extremely strenuous and physically demanding job. There were almost 300 employees buzzing around this cafe and I was in charge of 30 of them. Therefore, I was always at work. I worked long ass hours from 9am to 10 pm. Drummer boy, however, didn't feel the need to keep his job and decided to quit without mentioning it to me. Now, quitting would be alright if he had another job lined up. But no. This motherfucker sat on his ass for two weeks straight without moving a single muscle.

Now this part is important because it changed the entire dynamic of our relationship. I worked long hours, but on the days I got off on time I would still make him dinner. Eventually, he got a job as a dishwasher at BJ's. So he worked until 11 pm. That night I made him a plate, wrapped it up, and left it on the counter for him to eat. I was exhausted so I couldn't help but fall asleep. I woke up in the middle of night only to find drummer boy sleeping on the couch with his literal dick out in his hand and his phone in the other hand. For some reason his phone didn't lock and I could see that it was sexting messages between him and this girl he was trying to meet with. Now, I can't say whether or not this girl was real or if he was being catfished. But regardless, I was fucking pissed. This next part, I'm not necessarily proud of... I grabbed him and shoved him up against the wall; essentially waking him up from his sleep. I started yelling at him about what an ungrateful little fuck he was. I screamed that I work long hours and I come home to take care of him. Only to find out he was cheating on me during those long hours that I was away at work. Those texts dated back even before he lost his job. I was kind of disgusted with myself for not noticing right away, but I was so consumed with work and making money. I kicked him out.

I'm also not proud of this either, but I headed into a somewhat spiral. I was heartbroken. I was angry. I started letting out my sexual frustrations with random employees at my job. I didn't care whether I was their boss. I didn't care whether it was a man or a woman. I slept with *ALMOST* anyone and everyone. I knew I was trying to fill the empty void of heart ache, but I couldn't care less. I was miserable. I gave my attention to any man who gave it back to me. I even ruined an engagement because the guy left his fiance to be with me. I was selfish and reckless (this would be one of my deepest regrets). Drummer boy came into my work with a note and a bunch of Reese's chocolates as an apology for cheating on me. I never read the note, threw it in the trash, and continued on with my shift.

Eventually, I let drummer boy back into our apartment but we still weren't back together. At this point, Porto's had been open for a month and all the employees wanted to celebrate at Rock n' Brews across the street. I showed up to the event and obviously people were getting drunk fast. Everyone was having a great time, until we reached the very end.

I ended up making out with one of the kitchen managers. He was completely wasted and I was somewhat buzzed but not enough to not know what I was doing. He wanted me to come home with him, but I declined. This seem to upset him quite a bit which lead to a very heated conversation. I eventually took his keys because I knew he was too drunk to drive. But in the midst of our little dilemma, another one creeped it's way into my eye shot. I saw one of my employees crying. She huddled close to me, crying frantically into my arms. I asked her what was wrong, but before she could answer another one of the floor managers came storming our way. I saw him puffing his chest with an angry expression scrunching up his face. I looked at my employee again and quickly asked what happened. She told me that the floor manager was forcing her to sleep with him. She explained that the he screamed at her , saying that if she didn't sleep with him then he would drive off to his home drunk. And if he got into an accident, that it would be her fault. Obviously, this was a bunch of horse shit. I told her it wouldn't be her fault at all and to call an Uber home. She said that she would just sleep in her car until the next morning. I offered to pay for her Uber, but she declined. I said okay and nudged her toward her car. I watched her safely enter her vehicle but she truly never left. So, I assumed she would now be safe.

While this was happening, the kitchen manager (that I was making out with) was still mumbling and yelling at me to let him drive home. He got into my face and told me if I didn't hand him his keys, that he would beat the shit out of me. Now, I don't know why I thought I was being a hero, in retrospect, I should have let that asshole drive himself home...but, I felt like I couldn't live with that guilt on my conscious. So, I told him I'd like to see him try. He was so close to my face that I could smell the alcohol on his breath. Before things got worse, the floor manager approached me. Of course, he was explaining his side of the story. I didn't care very much to listen. Then, two other employees came along. One of them was so drunk he couldn't even stand and the other was one of our bus boys attempting to hold him upright. The floor manager stumbled his way to help the drunkard and his friend. Everyone was too drunk to drive home and I live 5 minutes down the street from this Porto's. So, I offered to drive everyone to the motel across the street. I suggested that everyone stay there until the next morning. The floor manager told me that he wanted me to stay and sleep at the hotel. I told him I was only 5 minutes away from Porto's and I would be fine. But then, the kitchen manager started yelling at me that if I didn't come and sleep with them at the hotel, then they will all drive off drunk. I was in the same predicament as my employee...only that, I was the only woman amongst the group. I figured that if I lied and said I would go while managing to sneak out then I could get everyone there safely at the least. So, I agreed. All of the boys (not men) trampled into my car as I drove us to the motel.

After a short 2 minute drive, the boys stumbled out of the car and into the office to grab a room key. I should have left then, but for some reason I wanted to make sure everyone did go inside the hotel. They grabbed a two queen size bed room. I helped grab the drunk employee up into the motel by myself and laid him down onto the bed. He was too fucked up to say much, but he thanked me. The floor manager and his bus boy told me they were going to look for a smoke shop and that they would be right back. I nodded as the kitchen manager was sloppily getting into the bed. Just as they left, the kitchen manager grabbed me and swung me on top of him. He started shoving his tongue into my mouth and I went with it for a second. But a few seconds after, I changed my mind. I stopped midway and told him that I didn't want to do this. He laughed and grabbed me and flipped me onto the mattress. I kept telling him no. I kept telling him I didn't want to do it. He didn't listen. I didn't fight it much either. I squirmed and repeatedly told him no, but why didn't I punch? Why didn't I kick him in his tiny fucking balls? No. I felt helpless. I felt like I was in shock. He lifted up my skirt and grabbed my underwear to hastily take it off. He undid his zipper and pulled out his dick. But, I was still squirming so he had a difficult time getting it in. I could feel the tip of his dick touching the outside of my vagina and I would squirm again. Eventually, he grunted and fell over onto his back. He was asleep. I got up and pulled my underwear back on. I was about to run out the door but I stopped. I was staring at the man who just attempted to fuck me. He laid on his back snoring with his dick hanging out. Asleep. With no fucking care in the world that he just traumatized me. I left him like that.

However, just as I was about to leave, the floor manager waltzes into the room. He looks at the kitchen manager laying on the bed with his dick out. He then turns to me with a smug look on his face.

"Looks like he had a good time. Huh?" He jokes.

I just stare at him, not saying anything. I told him I have to get going and he tells me no. He gets in front of me to stop me from getting to the door. He instructs me to sit in the chair as he lies down on the floor. He made himself a place on the floor with blankets and pillows because the two other idiots took up the beds. I sit down as I watch him look in my direction. He folds his hands behind the back of his head and says, "So, are you going to fuck me or what?"

Again, I say nothing.

He says, "Well, you fucked him. You're not going to fuck me?"

I tell him that I don't want to sleep with him and that I want to go home. He scoffs.

"If you don't sleep with me. I'm going to make your life a living hell at work," he says. Other threats were made in regards to my work, but I don't quite remember the exact words. All I know is. that he told me I would never get that promotion because he'll just rip it right out of my hands.

"I'd like to see you fucking try." is what I said. I guess it was the only phrase I could think of in moments like this. I got up confidently and walked out the door.

But, I never made it down the stairs. I clutched my chest and collapsed onto the first step. I started welling up with non stop tears. I was afraid and scared. I was overwhelmed with a multitude of different emotions.

A friend took me home but when I confided in him about what happened, he told me "boys will be boys". I was silent until I got home.

When I arrived, drummer boy was home. But I didn't want to tell him what happened. I went straight back outside and called a good friend of mine. She kept telling me, "Lani, you were r*aped and s**ually assaulted". I kept telling her I wasn't, because I couldn't really believe it. I was r*ped before, but my first abusive ex boyfriend (another story for another post). But this felt different, because I didn't know this person. I didn't know anything about him. And yet, he tried to access me in the most disgusting possible way. The next morning, I went to a safe space at a hospital so they could check me for his DNA and I filed a police report.

The following days truly were a living hell. The floor manager made me look bad in front of the higher ups by flooding my cafe with guests. He controlled how many guests go to each section (the bakery, coffee, cafe, and pre-order). He just kept sending everyone my way, while keeping every other section of Porto's lines short. Long lines upset my general manager.

Eventually, I broke down. I admitted everything to my manager. I was frantic and I couldn't breathe. They sent me home.

I had a couple of days off, but when I returned, things just got worse. People were whispering. My employees weren't listening to me. Other employees kept saying I was a whore. That I deserved it for being too flirty. That I always had my legs open. They sided with the kitchen manager. They claimed that I seduced him and then falsely accused him of r*pe. The kitchen manager was already transferred to another Porto's due to my case becoming public with everyone at work. The second that my case was for everyone to see, all the people who were involved wanted nothing to do with me. My employee that I saved from being sexually harassed asked me not to say anything about the situation regarding her and the floor manager. The drunk employee told me he couldn't lose his job over my case and that he was sorry. Inevitably, I lost my case because the floor manager told the detective that I looked perfectly fine and happy after I left the hotel room. As if I was satisfied with what took place. The detective apologized to me because my evidence wasn't enough. Even if they found parts of his semen around my vagina, it wasn't enough to prove that I didn't actually want it. He told me these cases were hard to pursue because it was always a "he said, she said" situation. And with all of the witnesses either withdrawing or siding with the kitchen manager... I ended up losing. I quit the following days.

[dystopiandilfs]

Dream's discord podcast. Basically him answering questions for 2.5 hours. This will sort of be in order but I fucked up my notes so it might not be in order completely. (From 13th May 2021)

For reference the photos at the end are: A prototype of fidget spinner merch as loads of people asked, a reference photo of his favourite merch and a photo he sent of his hair to prove he wasn't a brunette.

•He said his teeth are mostly straight but he's thought about getting Invisalign. He's never had braces. He has a tiny gap in the left side of his mouth and his canines are longer and sharper (vampire arc). He's never had teeth surgery so has his wisdom teeth still.

•He thinks pineapple on pizza is good.

•He likes seafood like lobster and crab. He had crab made in an air fryer last night. He like peas. He thinks quesadillas are good and likes most food.

•He hates Coffee and most drinks

•The Dream Shorts team is Ken who is his personal reminder (Ken's main job is to spam him with texts so he doesn't forget things as he's got a habit of reading texts and not replying) and also comes up with a list of sets for Dream shorts. The builder is a friend and munchymc builder "his talent gets wasted on Dream's shorts but we pay him so"

•His editors are currently Dizzy, Firesale and Mjcr. Willz doesn't edit for him anymore

•The mask animation isn't done but Mask should be released May 21st. He wants to release them together as "the whole song is a double meaning and the whole nuance will be lost without the animation" but no matter if the animation is done the song is getting released on the 21st.

•He and Sapnap eat together often.

•He and Sapnap prefer medium rare Steak

•He wants a home gym it's something he's willing to splurge on. They currently have a weight rack but they haven't even set it up.

•"Eat the rich? Shut up shut up" - Dream

•Talked about money basically saying "Most people don't understand how money works I don't have millions in my bank account it's in assets like merch, land and warehousing for that stuff" (He's not in his landlord arc)

•He's been debating Pride Merch because of Rainbow Capitalism. He doesn't want it too be seen as a money maker and if he does most proceeds would go to charity. He's currently super busy merch wise with Sapnap joining and George in the middle of joining. He did say "Only if the LGBTQ+ community in this community wants it" He thinks he's going to at least change the merch website to a pride one. Sapnap wants to make pride merch including a rainbow flame on his.

•He wants to create a charity that's centered around helping LGBTQ+ one day because he thinks that there's a lack of them. He mentioned that creating a charity was expensive and took a lot and was a complicated process including a board of directors but he wants to do it someday.

•He wanted to buy a bunch of houses in Florida which was a service to house mostly LGBTQ+ youth and people stuck in abusive households for free to get them out of bad home environments. But he didn't because he didn't want people thinking he was profiting of of abuse victims and LGBTQ+ community.

•He said he's terrible with time management and replying to people which is why Ken helps him (and also helps George and Sapnap). He mentioned how Sam messaged multiple times and Dream just forgot to answer but felt bad "I feel like people think I hate them..... Cause I'd be mad if people did that to me"

•He tries to reply to a few texts a day (community number). He also can't do birthday messages everyday because you can only reply at certain times so it's not abusing the system so if you get one it's special. He said he does try but it's got a weird time gap.

•Him and the manhunt winner are trying to come up with a good time to film

•He wants to stream this MCC on twitch and says his team is good.

•He talks about why he's not partnered with Twitch. Basically Twitch has a lock rate (in which you make money) and you legally can't stream on YouTube. So legally if Tommy wanted to stream on YouTube he couldn't. Someone then mentioned how Bad is a twitch partner but still streams on YouTube "Bad streams on YouTube but he has for a while and I don't think that he cares" - Dream

•He likes to reply to every donation he gets on stream and feels bad when he doesn't so he'll turn them off when he streams and wants a platform deal where he can be payed to stream (not twitch). If he gets a streaming partnership he will stream a couple of times a week. He looked in to Facebook but they don't have an alias system meaning you can see everyone's actual Facebook account and personal info, he doesn't like seeing real names on Facebook so it would require a lot of altering if he was to stream there so he's thinking it's probably going to be YouTube.

•He was asked about if his demographic was what he expected and he said he went in with no expectations, he didn't even know what stans were, wasn't really on social media so he wasn't aware of the fan culture. "You guys are a handful sometimes but it's worth it"

•He also mentioned how he and the DreamSMP changed the twitch audience demographic. It used to be male dominated in both streamers and audience and now it's almost split which is unheard on.

•He has 5 fidget spinners in his house. Two in his bedroom. Two in his office. One in the living room.

•He likes his Minecraft skin as he thinks the arm is cook and you never see the rest of his skin really. He says it's unique and different and "me". Dream: You can't even tell half the skins apart on MC.

•He's not lost the motivation to stream. Most of the times if he wants to stream he gets George or Sapnap to do it and he just turns up. It's more beneficial to them as they have donos and subs on. (Don't we fucking know it "can you say hi to")

•He has listened to Lovejoy. Says the ep was great and they're very talented and awesome. Doesn't know what his favourite song is but probably would pick One Day because the chorus slaps.

•RIP to acoustic Roadtrip. He said instead of acoustic Roadtrip we get Mask so no losses today for Dream stans.

•"With Roadtrip I went to Parker and I said Hey I have a story I want to tell through music. I have no experience with that can you help me" He said sure. He crafted the music and melodies and how things are formed where it's catchy. I have less comfort singing that. I love the song and it's my song, it's very representative of me and I'm sure I could sing it but it's a song I'd be kinds of scared to sing live, with Mask I basically did everything. I sat there the entire time and maybe an hour out if the 100 I wasn't in the call. Dream came up with the lyrics and main melody for Mask (First one he's ever come up with) "That was just notes in my fucking voice memos"

•The clip we heard of Mask was a prechorus not the actual chorus. He thinks he'd be more comfortable to do a mask acoustic and it's more melodic than Roadtrip. The chorus also has a lot of instruments similar to Roadtrip. Mask starts of slow and guitar with minimal reverb and is more raw.

• He doesn't want music to be his main thing. It's something fun to do and he's passionate about it as it's a way to express emotions. He wants to release mask then go from there. He wants to release at least one more song but has nothing on his mind currently. His two ideas were Roadtrip and Mask.

•He wouldn't quit his job to become a pizza delivery man.

•His favourite features on himself are eyes or freckles and he also confirmed that he does have eyebrows.

•He was told that Parkour warrior would be bought back some time in the near future and he got excited for it. "Even if I don't win, which I will, it'll be fun"

•Went on about his MCC team but I'm not going to put that in as we should be getting them today. He did say he wasn't on Pink but he did sound confused. (For reference he's always in Pink as it's the last team announced and keeps the hype up by announcing the biggest streamer last)

•Said he and his mum had the Mr Beast burger. He recommends because he likes the avacado. He mentioned how Mr Beast uses "Ghost Kitchens" which is basically where he gives restaurants permission to cook his food so it's restaurant quality food.

•His favourite piece of merch is the circle smile. (The pool photo on Instagram). He said the quality was bad (he worked with a different company and didn't have his own company) and it was elasticy feeling and he's planning on re-releasing it again but with good quality.

•He's started to send merch out in custom packaging. So his bags have the smile and will mostly be green. Sapnap's has the flame and is either black or white. He's also trying to make it so every order has the sticker packs for both him and Sapnap.

•He loves the coins as it's cheaper than a hoodie but still celebrates the milestones and will last a long time. He mentioned how the old coins are getting removed off the site and how if you have any of the coins your special because only a few thousand get made. He's kept around 100 of each coin that he wants to give away in person.

•He wanted to have a cool store where you could access computers that give you access to the DreamSMP in spectator mode. But it's too costly and would require too much time and isn't safe fight now. He doesn't think it'd be worth it financially.

•Most of the hoodie are black instead of multiple colours because of limited supply and covid. Getting the colours are harder because if the pandemic which hopefully won't be an issue soon.

•He wants to do a short meetup tour with Sapnap and George with a few locations in the US (and if others nearby want to join like Quackity or Karl they can). He also wants to visit Australia, UK, Canada, Mexico and Philippines and do something like that there but definitely at least visit with George and Sapnap.

•He's never been to the Philippines but his mum has. He wants to set up a place in the Philippines where he can ship merch in bulk and it would help to reduce shipping. However it would probably be big milestone merch.

•He's not got the vaccine yet but will get it when he needs to. He doesn't leave the house so he doesn't see the point.

•He's the ideas man. George's footcam video was Dream's idea. The T-shirt video was Dream's idea. Most if not all of the Dream Team's videos are Dream's ideas.

•Said he's got a similar/the same hair colour as Froy (Dream buddy at this point the only difference between you and Froy is that one of you is dating Richard Madden /lh)

[mikkomacko]

Domestic Wolf 2: The Return of Bucky Barnes

Hello everyone! I’m back with more Domestic Wolf, this time in a bit of a flashback. If you haven’t read the first part here it is!

Part 3

Thanks for reading!

Warnings: Angst, Smut, Mentions of death, Sad Bucky :(

2023

The address in Queens sits useless in his text messages, ready for him to click on for directions but he doesn't need it. Truth is, he doesn't even need to read it anymore considering it's been burned into his mind since she first sent it to him. Almost a week ago the text had come through with the address, followed by a sweet message of "come home soon or I'll kick your ass".

It wasn't the first time she told him that and he's certain it won't be last.

By the time he's at the iron gate of the building, hands tucked into the pockets of his leather jacket, Bucky's feeling like the man that would show up on her doorstep in Romania all those years ago, guided by loneliness and guilt. Back then he had nothing but her. Now he has nothing but her. It's like stepping back in time, back to the apartment he'd hide out in for as long as he could, grounding himself to a new world with the help of a woman that always cared for him. She picked him back up after Hydra, dusted him off and kissed the wounds better. And he knows she'll do it again now, more dusting and kisses for the fact that he just lost another 5 years of his life and his best friend.

Bucky doesn't know this world, doesn't trust it. Even when he was on the run he didn't trust the world. It's why he always kept them hidden, only took her out into the city late at night when he knew he'd could keep her safe, keep her as his little secret. It's also why he refused to let her travel up-state for him, refused to let her meet him outside on the sidewalk. He doesn't know who or what could be out here, and until he does, she's remaining hidden.

A quick glance up and down the street, Bucky let's out a nervous puff of air and opens the faux lock on the gate. She had told him on the phone that it wasn't real, at one time it had been but it broke awhile ago and was never replaced. He hated it then and he hates it now, so he makes a mental note to get her landlord to replace it.

Through the entryway, up the flights of stairs, and to the fifth floor. Maybe he should be looking around, taking more note of the details of this building but he can't bring himself to do it right now because his girl is waiting for him. She's been waiting for him since he left to Wakanda 7 years ago and he's tired of it. He wants- no needs - to see her right now.

5B. A dark blue door with a little rug in front that reads "Hello, is it me you're looking for" with a depiction of who Bucky believes to be Lionel Richie but he's not sure. Y/n liked a lot of different musicians. It's hard to keep track of who sings what.

Bucky's boots have barely touched the mat before the door is ripping open. His eyes meet hers, tears already welling on her waterline and Bucky's sting with tears of his own. Body moving instinctively, he steps into the apartment, kicking the door shut with his foot and reaching for her waist.

"Doll..."

"Bucky..."

She flings herself at him with enough force to knock him over if it weren't for the serum running through him, legs around his hips and arms around his neck. He tucks his face into her neck, fingers trembling as they grip her back, her shoulders, her hips, anywhere he can get his hands on. It's surreal, holding her again. He hasn't felt her skin, heard her voice, kissed her lips since he went under after Zemo scrambled his brain again.

"I missed you, so much Bucky." She whispers, voice cracking under the stress of the sentiment, and he's reminded that while it's been a long time for him, it's been even longer for her. He died. He was gone, wiped from the Earth and she had no idea if he was coming back or not. Had the roles been reversed, had he been the one left standing here while she was reduced to dust, he can't imagine staying as sane as she has. He has a feeling an unwelcomed friend would've returned and he probably would have done things to pile onto his ever present guilt. Another reason why he doesn't deserve her.

"It's ok sweetheart," he promises, voice thick. "I'm back and I'm not going anywhere, ok?" She pulls back from him, just enough to cup his face in her right hand. Her thumb brushes over his cheek bone, wiping away tears he didn't know he shed, and he takes a moment to admire her.

Her hair is longer, face thinner, and dark circles sit under her swollen eyes. She looks exhausted, like she's been holding the weight of the world on her shoulders for far too long but her eyes hold all the joy in the world. She's happy and beautiful and even better than he remembered.

"I can lock you up in here," she offers, bottom lip trembling but still smiling. "they'd never find you again."

He can't stop himself. He kisses her for the first time in years, soaks up her startled gasp and replaces it with a hum of contentment. Her fingers tangle in his hair, nudging his lips even closer to hers, and he grips the back of her neck to remind her that he's here, he'll always be here.

"Just you and me, huh?" He murmurs, mouths still hovering close. She smiles shakily, tilting her head to kiss the corner of his mouth and giggling when his beard tickles her lips.

Just Bucky and his girl.

~

His jacket finds its way to the floor of the entryway, a pool of leather on the light wood panels. His boots are kicked off, toppled haphazardly next to her shoes by the door. Two leather gloves are thrown onto the table leading to the living room. Her shirt sits with his, layered on top of each other in the living room. She's somehow managed to wiggle a hand between the two of them, enough to unbutton and lower the zipper of his black jeans. In a room he doesn't care to admire yet, sat on the edge of the large matress with her on his thighs, Bucky's breaths tremble as y/n ghosts her fingers over his left shoulder. The last time she saw him like this, his arm was still made of the same silver metal that had ruined so many lives, hurt so many people. And yeah he'd gotten this one in order to fight another war, one he lost before actually winning, but at least this time he was fighting for the side he actually believes in.

He reminds himself of that when she kisses over his heart. "They're gone," she murmurs, pointer finger trailing over what used to be scar tissue, mangled flesh, and nail marks.

"They're there if you look hard enough."

She looks up at him through her eyelashes, understanding the double meaning. Shuri couldn't erase them entirely, not on his skin and not in his soul.

"The good thing about scars," she says, "is that they don't hurt you anymore. And eventually you accept the weight of them."

He kisses her again, unable to voice his appreciation and love for her. His fingers slip under the band of her jeans, digging into the soft flesh and her own dominant hand finds it's way into his pants, groping at the chub on the inside of his thighs and ghosting over the bulge in his boxers. Bucky manages to pull her bottoms down, nudging her up to her feet so she can kick them off.

Giggling, she presses a sloppy kiss to his chin before dropping to her knees between his thighs. A kiss to the scar just above his belly button pulls a laugh from him, Bucky burying his fingers in her hair to keep it from falling in her face. Her fingers grip the sides of his jeans and boxers, and he lifts his hips so she can pull them both down in one go.

Maybe they should be talking, reacquainting with one another. After all, he knows nothing about how she got here. Where's she working? Why'd she pick Queens to live? Why did she leave Romania? What's she been doing the past five years? But maybe they need to find each other physically first. Because it's been so long since they've touched each other, loved each other. And this is how it started all those years ago. The first real thing Bucky was able to give to her after Hydra was his body. That was all he had, and luckily for him she accepted it and cherished it. For the first time since the 40s his body had been used for good.

Maybe that's what they both need again.

Bucky finds himself sprawled out on the bed, head on her pillows and hands on her waist as she climbs on top of him. Their mouths meet again, a soft groan leaving his lips as she threads her fingers through his hair. Out of habit he reaches for her bedside table, sitting up just slightly to open the drawer. Y/n moves her kisses to his jaw, breath hot on his skin. By the time he's registered that's he's reaching for condoms that probably aren't there, his fingers catch on a familiar box.

"How long have these been here doll?" He asks, praying to the Gods that they're not expired. Or even worse, that they'd been there for someone else to use. The thought makes him ache so painfully he'd rather have his brain fried again than imagine someone else loving on his girl.

She pulls back, meeting his eyes with a cheeky smile. "A week."

A week. About the time she got that first phone call from him, the call that confirmed Steve's and the Avengers success in bringing everyone back. She went out and bought him condoms as soon as she found out that he was alive. Needy girl.

"Went shopping for me sweetheart?" He teases, pecking her lips and tearing open the box. He digs out a foil, tossing the box off to the side, hearing it clatter to the floor.

Laughing, she kisses him again. "What can I say, I missed you Sarge." Bucky's dick throbs, groaning dramatically at the name. She occasionally called him Sarge back in Romania, after he'd come to terms with the memories that plagued and confused him. Sarge made him comfortable. He knew he used to be a Sergeant, could feel it deep in his bones that that was a title he held with pride. Hearing her say it to him, in a way that had his spine tingling. Like she was proud of him too. Bucky will never be able to explain how good that makes him feel.

She takes the packet from his fingers, kissing the tip of his nose with a coy smile as she opens it. He barely gets the chance to grip the back of her neck and bring her lips back to his before she's gripping him in her hand, stroking him a couple times and giggling through his choked gasp. The condom is rolled down his length, her fingers familiar and comforting on his skin, welcomed.

"Come on doll," he whispers, lashes fluttering as she drags the head of him through her soaked folds. Then she's sinking down on him, slowly easing his cock deeper and deeper. Bucky's toes curls, stomach swirling, and skin burning in pleasure.

"Oh God," y/n breaths, nails digging into Bucky's chest as her nose scrunches and her eyes fall shut. He takes a hold of her waist, sitting up against the headboard so he can pull her chest closer to his. She moves with him easily, melting in his hold when he presses his lips to her shoulder. His right hand drops to cup her ass, pulling her hips up and then guiding them back down until she's carefully riding him.

"Let me hear you baby," he requests, brushing his lips under her ear. "haven't heard your voice in so long."

Y/n's fingers tug at his hair, drawing his mouth back to hers for a brief kiss. "Haven't felt you in so long, Buck," she whispers back, teasingly. His cock pulses as she rolls her hips on him.

"Been waiting for me?" He asks, dragging his lips down her collar bone. She nods, a breathy "Yes" escaping her above him. "Poor doll, waiting for me all these years."

"Worth it," she says with conviction. "you're always worth it."

A kiss over her heart, Bucky digging his nose into her soft skin to feel her heartbeat. He pulls her down on his cock, grinning when the beat stutters in time with her gasp. He loves it, loves hearing her, feeling her. Unable to help himself any longer, Bucky digs his heels into the sheets and starts fucking up into her, hips meeting hips.

The noises she makes, the moans of his name make his belly tighten and his cock twitch, enough to have him nearing his end far sooner than he hoped. It's been so long since he's had her and he can't even get his fucking dick to cooperate. A tug on his hair and a quick bounce of her hips has him biting back a moan, almost frantic as he moves his left hand between them, thumb finding her clit. The sob that leaves her has his head spinning, Bucky occupying his mouth with her pebbled nipple to keep from moaning. He still hasn't gotten used to the fact that he can openly make noise now, something he used to work on around her, but he prefers using it as an excuse to keep his mouth occupied elsewhere.

"Fuck, so close Bucky," she pants, thighs trembling around his and he takes it upon himself to hold her full weight with his free arm, lifting her up and pulling her back down on his cock. He feels like a whole different man when his orgasm hits, burying his face in her chest with a loud groan.

"Oh doll, so good y/n, so fucking good."

She follows shortly after him, nails digging into his bicep and scalp, body trembling and clenching. He coaxes her through it with wet kisses and gentle circles of his thumb on her sensitive bud. His bones and muscles feel like jelly when he relaxes back into the pillows, carding his fingers through her messy hair while the other strokes over her hip.

"If I knew this would be my homecoming," he murmurs, "I would've been back days ago."

She giggles, cheeks rosy and eyes bright. "Isn't this the proper way to welcome a soldier home?"

He smiles and shrugs, bittersweet. "Wouldn't know doll, this is my first time making it home."

~

"You wanna tell me what happened?"

Her thumb strokes over his bottom lip, dropping down to the dimple in his chin, and Bucky sighs contently. Truth is, he doesn't want to tell her what's happened. He doesn't want to talk about Wakanda, or Thanos, or being dead, or Steve leaving. He just wants to be here with her, pretending that he's normal for once in his God damn life.

"How about you tell me first doll?" He whispers, his eyes soaking up the sight of her. "Last time I saw you, you were saving lives in Bucharest."

"Actually, I was sitting in Wakanda with the love of my life," she corrects, smiling. His heart flutters happily, ears heating up with a blush. Pretending to blow her comment off, he rolls his eyes and chuckles.

"Alright, what happened after that?"

Inhaling deeply, she settles further back against the headboard. Bucky tilts his head up, just enough to kiss her stomach through the fabric of his t-shirt before laying his head back in her lap. Her fingers card through his hair as she speaks.

"I stayed in Romania after you went under, kept working at the camp and stuff. Steve would call sometimes, make sure I was ok," she lets out a little laugh, oblivious to Bucky's sudden nausea at the sound of his best friend's name. "We actually broke into your old apartment. It was still technically a crime scene but I knew there was stuff in there that you'd want."

"Doll," he interrupts with a sigh, "you didn't have to do that. It-all that stuff was just stuff."

Her fingers pull on his hair, enough to make him wince. "Not to me," she insists, "That "stuff" was you a-and us. It was our life before we were even allowed to have a life and I couldn't just let them box it up as evidence."

Guilty, Bucky swallows the lump in his throat and nods. Of course those things, the letters and drawings and stories all meant something to him, but not enough for her and Steve to risk punishment for. Never enough for that. He wishes she'd see that.

"After Thanos," she continues, voice falling weak. "I stayed in Romania for as long as I could, trying to help everyone. It-it was pure chaos, all these people trying to figure out what was going on. And the whole time I kept thinking of you. As soon as footage of the attack in New York got out, I knew he'd be going for you. I-I thought that you'd be fine. You're so fucking stubborn I knew there's no way you wouldn't survive.

"Even when people started to disappear, I didn't-I couldn't even convince myself that you would be one of them. It was a few days later when Steve called. I knew before I even answered the phone."

At the first sniffle, Bucky sits up, pushing himself to sit next to her. Before he can even reach for her, she's climbing into his lap, laying her head on his right shoulder and setting her hand over his heart. He holds her tight, trying his best to soak up her tears.

"It was so unfair Bucky," she whimpers, "because I was just about to get you back a-and you were supposed to finally be happy and he took you from me. After everything you've been through, you lost even more of your life and I couldn't do a damn thing about it."

Fighting back his own tears, he shushes her. "I'm here now, and I'm happy," he promises. "I'm always happy when I'm with you. What happened isn't your fault y/n. I'd never blame you for that."

If possible, she snuggles even closer to him. "I thought I could ignore it. I could stay there and pretend you were still just in Wakanda, getting better so that you could come home."

Bucky's heart aches at that. Picturing his girl, his kind and strong girl, saving and repairing lives in a war torn society, pretending that the man who loves her will be coming home soon when it reality he didn't exist anymore...it all hurts him too much. It's all too much, especially knowing that she loves him enough to live in denial just to imagine he's with her.

"But everyone kept asking who I lost, where were we when it happened and I kept insisting that it didn't matter because you were coming back and we were going to live happily ever after. I realized that we don't have a home, you and I, and I remembered you talking about moving to Brooklyn one day. That you wanted to go back to your home city.

"I couldn't bring myself to move there without you. It didn't feel right. So I picked Queens. It's close and the hospital nearby had an opening in the ER, so I figured why not? That way when Steve got off his ass and decided this time he was going to save his best friend, you'd have somewhere to come home to."

Steve, his best friend. The man that couldn't find enough of a reason to stay. Bucky wasn't enough to make him stay, because he has his soulmate here with him, and Steve's was long gone. He chose love over friendship and Bucky wishes he could hate him for that, but he can't, because he chose y/n too. If it weren't for her, he'd have been begging to go back to the 40s too.

Gently, he grips her chin between his thumb and forefinger, guiding her to look up at him. Through wet eyelashes and puffy eyes, she looks at him with so much love he can feel it burning in his chest. A kiss to each of her tear stained cheeks.

"Thank you doll," he whispers, "for never giving up on me. For doing all this for me-for us." He swipes his knuckle over her chin, smiling softly when she giggles. He missed that. "I love you."

He kisses her, cupping her jaw and pulling her into him until it feels like they're one being. Her fingers trace over the edge of his left arm, chills running up his spine. He missed that too.

"You're getting soft on me James," she teases breathlessly, smiling against his lips. He hums in agreement. He did get soft for her, but he doesn't fucking care. No one will ever make him feel bad for loving her. "I love you too Buck. Always will."

[20moonchild21]

๛Struggling

Gif by @minyoongihoseok

Pairing: Poly!BTS x girlfriend!reader

Warnings: hardcore fluff, slight swearing

Words: 3400+

ッ

๛匕he one where she struggles with money∙ꨄ

"What do you mean, you can't pay me this month?" You asked angrily, as you drove your hands through your hair.

"I am sorry, but what should I do? Rents are high these days. If I don't pay..." Your boss tried to defended himself with the same excuses he had given you before.

"Rents are hight? Are you serious right now?" You interrupted him quickly, getting angrier with every word he said. "What do you think I pay my rent with? Paperclips and stones? I need this money or else I have to quit my apartment. We have a contract. You have to pay me, please!"

Times were hard these days. The pandemic had hit the country hard, but aftermath was even worse. Most people were still too afraid to go out onto the streets, rather staying home and shopping online for everything, which causes you a big problem.

For years you had worked in a small bakery, that was known for their extravagant pastries and specialities. The pay wasn't much, but you loved your creative job.

Seeing people smiling when they see their wedding cake for the first time, was one of the best thing coming along with you job, but with no weddings allowed, there was no one to buy those expensive cakes. And the few people buying small cupcakes wasn't enough for keeping the business alive.

Of course you knew that your boss's hands were tight, as well as yours. He had to pay his rent, but so did you.

"I am so sorry." He said again, sounding almost sad. "But I can't give you this money. We made almost zero sales this month. My pockets are empty. I already need to take my own, private money to save the shop, or else I can close next month."

You closed your eyes, as your hands were gripping the armrest of the chair you were sitting on. You weren't the type to yell or scream at people when things didn't go the way you like it, but this time, you just wished to yell out all your frustration at him.

Everything came together at this point, which made it hard for you to keep calm.

You hadn't seen your boyfriends in over 3 weeks, because they were stuck in quarantine at home after coming back from a project filming abroad.

Then, your period had started unannounced this morning, causing you a ruined trouser and cramps, along with a heavy headache.

And now it seemed like you even would be homeless next month, because you weren't able to afford your rent.

You pressed you eyes closer together, trying to hold back the swelling tears.

"Maybe you have someone who could borrow...." You boss began again, but you didn't want to head what he was about to say.

Making depts was the last thing you wanted to make. You mother had always raised you to earn your own money, and pay for the thing you want to have yourself.

Asking someone for money would lead you to asking for more and more and more, until you can't pay that someone back. The same situation you were stuck in now.

"It's okay." You said quietly. "I will find a solution. Have a nice weekend."

You bent down, grabbing for you bag and leaving the small office, heading straight back home.

The next morning was hard for you. The letter lying in your mailbox in evening wasn't helping to cheer up your mood. You landlord was getting more and more impatient, waiting for his rent to be paid. You were already 3 weeks late with you rent, and slowly he was running out of sympathy.

The words he wrote held you up from sleep the whole night, causing you to desperately think about a solution for this problem:

"...termination without notice if the rent is not be paid within the next two weeks..."

You had cried a lot this last night. Never in you life you had thought that you would end up like this, broke and desperate. You even had considered to jump over your pride and ask your boyfriends, who clearly had enough money, to help you out. But you quickly threw away this option, not wanting to use them because of their money.

With no other option left, you found yourself sitting on your laptop, checking you bank account. Of course you never spend all your money all at once. You had laid back a certain amount of money, your life savings, that you had sworn to never touch.

This money was so important for you, because it was meant to be spend into your future. A future that included your boyfriends, a own house, a car.....children.

Of course, you knew that each of your boyfriends were millionaires, multiplied with 7.

If you wanted, you would never have to go to work ever again. With their money, they could probably buy you 10 houses, 9 cars, 5 horses, a plane and everything you could ever wish for.

But that had never been your goal in life. You didn't want them to pay everything for you. They had own dreams, and each of them had worked hard to earn this much money. You couldn't and you wouldn't take advantages of that.

"Fuck." You whispered, as your head sunk onto the table you were sitting on.

By now, you couldn't hold back your tears anymore.

You computer screen showed your online bank account, listing the accounts you had created years agon. Among them the one that was your last chance to not be homeless soon:

Life Savings.

As you clicked on the link, a new window opened on your screen, showing you all the amount of money you had saved.

4,516 $

You stared at this number. Of course, this didn't sound too much in the first moment, but you were still young, and with 4000$ you would easily come through another 4 months, even more if you would be economical.

The tears were still running down your plump cheeks, rolling over your chin and staining your blue shirt. You didn't want to do that at all, but you had no other choice.

The only person you would have been brave enough to ask for help, was your mom. Sadly, she died 5 years ago, with all her bereaved money spent for the hospital bills and the funeral.

You sighed heavily. There was no going back now. You would transfer the money to your landlord today, before he could kick you out.

You were about to click the small 'Transfers' button, when suddenly your doorbell rang. You flinched heavily when the loud noise rang through you ear, obviously not expecting someone today.

You stood up and walked out of your bedroom, over to the front door.

Immediately when you opened the door, a bouquet of red roses blocked your view. You let out a small shriek, when the red flowers sunk down, revealing a familiar face behind it.

"Hello." Jimin flashed you his beautiful smile, before he pushed the flowers into Namjoon's arms, stepping forward and lifting you into his arms.

"Oh my god." You breathed out as you broke away from you paralysis. You wrapped your arms highly around the silver haired boy, who was still hugging you. "You are here."

"Jimin, don't break her." You heard Yoongi's deep voice from behind. "We still need her."

He tugged Jimin's shirt, until he let you down onto the floor, pouting as he had to pull away from you. He pressed a gentle kiss to your nose one last time, before the next boy stepped forward.

Their very presence was enough for you to calm down from the past stressing days. Having them squeezing you in their arms, kissing you all over your face made you feel so loved and invulnerable in the moment.

"May we step in?" Jin asked as he pulled away from you.

Still overwhelmed from their sudden visit, you looked at him confused. He gestured his hand into your apartment. You quickly stepped away from the doorway, letting them step inside.

"Are you okay, Jagiya (Honey)? You look a little bit pale." Jungkook asked as he stepped in front of you.

He lifted his hand up towards your forehead, feeling if you had a fever. But your skin felt cold under his touch.

"I am just – I am just surprise that you...." You began to stutter as they all stared at you.

They could tell that something was up with you. Being together for almost 3 years now, they knew that you would began to slightly stutter when you try to hide something. So you had to think about an excuse, before one of them would ask more questions.

"What are you even doing here?" Was the first thing that came into your mind. "Shouldn't you be in quarantine or something?"

"Silly Jagiya." Jungkook laughed as he cupped your face into his big, manly (and now tattooed) hands, pressing a wet kiss onto your nose. "Three weeks are over. We can leave the dorm again, so we decided to surprise you!"

The boys quickly let go of your strange behaviour. You all went into your living room where Hoseok and Tae were already pulling out your sofa, that way you would all fit on it. As soon as they placed the cushions back onto the sofa, you were lifted from the ground a thrown onto it.

"Hey!" You laughed and giggled as Jimin crawled over you.

He laid his much heavier body onto your smaller one, trapping you under him. He grabbed for you wrists, pulling them up over your head, where he pinned them down onto the soft fabric. With his mouth, he placed a line of kisses from your collarbone up to your ear.

"I missed you so much." He whispered as he nibbled the sensitive skin of your ear. "I thought about you a lot during quarantine, Sweetie."

You knew what he wanted from you. As Namjoon once said, Jimin needed indeed a lot of love and attention, but you loved to give it to him. Sadly, you had to disappoint him this time.

He was already pulling and tugging on your shirt, when you brought your mouth up to his ear.

"I am on my period." You whispered in that sexy voice you knew he normally loved.

He pulled away from you, looking into your eyes deeply.

"Are you serious?" He whined as he let go of your arms.

You were already laughing hard when the other finally came from the kitchen with snacks and drinks in their hands.

"What are you laughing at, Jagyia?" Tae asked as he plopped down next to you. "And why is he already pouting?"

He gestured for Jimin, who had crawled off of you, and was now lying beside you, hiding his face in your chest as you drove your fingers through his soft hair.

"She is being mean." He mumbled against your chest. "Stacking me three weeks in quarantine, with no one to care for me, and now that I have the chance to finally love my girlfriend again, she is one her period. You did this on purpose, didn't you?"

"We had phone sex almost ever day." You laughed at him as you pressed a kiss into his hair.

"But this isn't the same." He still whined. "And we hadn't had sex yesterday. So you can't say every day. And beside, sex over the phone isn't the same..."

You sighed at his words. You forgot to call them the previous evening, because of all the stress going on with your work and apartment.

"I am sorry." You said, as you threw your head back into the soft cushions. "I was just so stressed with work and stuff."

"Is everything okay with work?" Yoongi asked as he took your hand. "It must be hard for you when no weddings are allowed."

For a moment, your thought about telling them about the trouble your boss had with keeping the business going, but you decided to not bother them with your problems. They had enough stress with their band.

"Yes, yes, Everything is fine." You quickly tried brushed his concerns off. "We have a lot of pre orderings and stuff."

The topic quickly changed. The boys told you everything they did while stuck up in quarantine. They had used the time to work on their new album, which they wanted to do on their own. They told you how recording and producing was going.

"Hey, Aein (Sweetheart)?" Namjoon suddenly spoke up. You lifted your head from Hoseok's chest to look up at him. "Have you seen my green shirt by any chance? I couldn't find it anywhere at the dorm."

"Oh yes." You quickly said. "You forgot it the evening before you left. I washed and folded it on my desk. You can get it."

He nodded and got up from the sofa to walk up towards you bedroom. The other boys meanwhile where swarming about the evening before they left for America three weeks ago, complaining how bad they need you.

ꕀ

Namjoon had reached your bedroom door quickly.

He pushed it open and stepped inside. Immediately, he smiled when he saw your tidy bedroom. You have always been an organized person, which he admired, because he absolutely wasn't able to hold his room at home tidy.

He looked around, and spotted his green shirt, carefully folded on the table next to your laptop. He passed your bed and was about to reach his hand out for the piece of fabric, when his eyes fell onto the sheet of paper lying onto your desk.

He didn't want to invade your privacy, but the headline of the sheet caught his attention.

"Admonition: Pay your rent." Was written at the top of the paper.

His eyebrows cocked up. You didn't mention to them that you were laid with paying your rent this month. Normally, you didn't keep any secrets from each other.

He quickly read over the text. It seemed like you not only forgot to pay your rent, but you had delayed the day of paying several times. His eyes shifted over to your laptop, that was still opened up from when you were earlier working on it.

He entered the password, and the window of your bank account popped open. He saw which account you had opened, and it shocked him. He knew about your life savings, and he was slowly combining the figures.

You sometimes had mentioned that you didn't eared much money with your job, but you had never before complained about being not able to pay for your rent. Why would you take your life saving, instead of asking one of the boys or him for help? They would always help you out.

He stood up from the desk and walked towards the door. He quickly had to ask you about the rent topic, before you would do something you will regret later.

"Aein!" He called from the doorway. "Can you come here for a second, please?"

He waited for you to finally reach the room. Confused, you looked at your tall boyfriend sitting on your bed, looking kind of nervous and worried.

"Are you okay?" You asked, suddenly being pretty nervous yourself.

He didn't answer, instead, he gestured for you to take a place next to him on the bed. You made your way up,, and let your body sink down next to his. From this position, your gaze fell onto your desk. A flash of shock hit your body. Had he read the letter? What if he saw your bank account? What....

"I – ehm – I just want to say that I didn't want to invade your privacy. It was an accident." He said, as he took your hand, looking deep into your eyes. "But I saw the letter lying on your table. Are you having trouble with paying your rent? You know we would ever...."

"No, I am fine." You quickly said, not wanting to hear what he was about to say. "My boss is just a little bit late with my payment. But it will eventually arrive within the next days."

He looked at you intensely, knowing that you were lying because he saw your bank account. He sighed, and pulled you over from your spot onto his lap. Immediately, your arms wrap around his neck, nuzzling your nose into his neck. His apple scent was overwhelming your nose.

"Aein." He said quietly while stroking your back in small circles. "Why are you lying to me? You know that I, that we, would always help you out. I saw on your computer that you were about to take the money from your life savings. Why would you do that instead of asking one of us?"

By now, you couldn't hold back the tears anymore. Not only had you lied to your boyfriends, you also had to admit yourself that you had problems that you couldn't solve on your own. You hugged him tighter, sobbing quietly into his neck.

Namjoon didn't say anything, he just rocked you gently back and forth, rubbing small circles on your back. He wanted to give you the time to tell him by your own. After a few minutes, you finally pulled away from the soft skin of his neck, eyes puffy and red.

"I – I don't – I am sorry." You sobbed even more, not being able to say the words. This was a really big deal for you. "I just don't you to think that I need your money to survive and - and I didn't want to have any depts. So I thought I – I could use some money from my life saving to bridge over this month."

You looked at your hands in your lap, fiddling with the sleeve of Namjoon's shirt.

"Look at me." He said, as he lifted you face by your chin. "Did one of us make you ever feel like you were dependent from us?"

You shook your head slightly, without hesitation.

"Did one of us make you ever feel judged when you had problems?"

You shook your head again.

"Did one of us denied you any help once, when you needed it?"

"No." You whispered.

He pressed a kiss onto your forehead. He then placed his left arm under your kneecap and his right arm under your back to lift you up in his arms. As he began to walk out of your room, you wrapped your arms once again around his neck.

When the two of you reached the living room, all the other heads shot up from the TV.

"Where have you been so long?" Jin asked as he shoved a hand full of crisps into his mouth.

When they saw your puffy eyes, they all immediately knew that your had been crying. Namjoon sat down onto the sofa, letting go of you, as another pair of strong arms were already wrapped around your body from behind.

"What happened?" You heard Jungkook whispering in your ear from behind, as he placed small kisses all around your ear.

You hesitated for a moment. Then looking up at Namjoon, who gestured for you to tell them, by lying his hand on your knee.

Carefully, you told your boyfriends about the financial problems your had. You told them about your work and your boss not being able to pay your payment in time, so you could pay your rent in time. You told them about you not being brave enough to ask someone for help, because you were embarrassed.

The boys listened carefully, as you spoke.

"But Jagyia." Jimin had crawled up beside you. "We are together. You have to tell us everything that is on your mind. We would never reject you, you know?"

"I know." You laughed slightly as you kissed his plump lips, that were just inches away from yours. "I am sorry. I thought I can just bridge this month."

"You are so silly sometimes." Jin suddenly said, as he bent forward to grab your arms pulling you along with him as he threw himself backwards onto the sofa. "I want you to trust us with everything that bothers you. We want you to be happy."

The eighth of you kept talking a little while longer, until you heard the words:

"Maybe paying rent is not necessary anymore, because there actually is something we wanted to ask you for quite a long time now."

________________________________________

I think this one is pretty cute.

What do you think is the question at the end? I thin it is pretty obvious. Lol.

Mꨄ

[hauntedfoxinternet]

Hey so I'm taking a break from posting my The Arcane's sister for a bit so here's a bit of you and Nari fluff

It was a few weeks after you met Douxie and his companions in the city. It was a lot to take in once you found out he was a wizard and his cat was his FAMILIAR and his other companion who was a very cute flower. WAS A DEMI-GOD!!! You of course like any normal human being passed out but you came to your senses and calmed down.

You were tight on money and had lost you house to a landlord who was a bit rude and (other things that shall not be named as this is a fluff post) So Douxie being the wonderful human being he is let you crash at his place but there was a tiny problem....There was only 2 beds.....So you got to chose who to share the bed with. And you not wanting to disturb anyone you chose the couch. But Douxie didn't uprove so he told you he would sleep on the couch so you could use his bed. This went with a lot of back and forth's between you and him as you told him you would be fine and you didn't want to disturb him but he said that it was fine and alright to use his bed.

So with reluctance you gave in and you used Douxie's bed while he slept on the couch.

But when it came time to get to bed you just couldn't. You tossed and turned in bed as you tried to fall asleep. You finally got up and looked at the alarm clock as it read 1:33 AM. 'Looks like my insomnia is getting worse....and it had to happen while i'm staying with Douxie....' you thought as you got up and opened the door quietly and tip-toed out of the room and into the kitchen.

'I guess I could make some tea....' you thought as you quietly got out some Chamomile Lavender tea you hid in the back of the walk-in pantry Douxie has. You made your way out of the pantry and over to the sink to heat some water in the electric teapot Douxie had.

As you where taking the teapot to put the water into the mug you had acsadently touched the side and it burned your hand a little. You had to stifle a yelp as you didn't want to wake the others.

As you where walking back to Douxie's room with your tea in hand you stopped in the hallway abruptly as you saw Naris room door open a creak and just brushed it off. As you closed the door to Douxie's room and came over to the bed you stopped as you felt eyes on you. You looked over to the bed. And what you saw almost gave you a heart attack you had to stifle a scream and not drop your tea all at once. Once you calmed down you looked over again to the bed to see what scared you and you could only see two Green amber orbs starring back at you from the bed.

"N-Nari....is that you..." You mange to squeak out.

"Yes Y/N....?" Nari said back as they blinked as you walked over to the nightstand and sat your tea down and turned the bedside light on. Once doing so you could see Nari clearly now and not just there eyes they had on some plant pajamas on and had there hair in a nice intricate braid while you just had yours down in its respective length. Your (H/C) hair was a little hard to put into anything intricate like Naris so you usually had it down or in a pony-tail.

"What are you doing in here." You ask as you got out a book from your bag and got back under the covers.

"Well I heard you come out of Douxie's room and wondered what you where doing and I seen you go to the kitchen and I could feel you got hurt so I came in here to check on you and you came back only 5 seconds later." They explain as you sip your tea.

"So where did you get hurt?" They ask as they come over to you.

You held up your hand for them to see the burn. They used there magic to heal it and you thanked them for it.

You went back to the book you where reading as Nari let go of your hand.

You half expected them to leave but you didn't expect them to snuggle into your arm as you read.

"What are you reading?" They ask Curious as always.

"I'm reading a book called (F/B/T) It's one of my favorites." You say as you began reading out loud for Nari to hear the story as you and Nari began to fall off to sleep your tea all but gone from the cup and Nari snuggling your arm as you rest your head on theirs being careful of her antlers. And you stayed like that for awhile untell Morning was on the horizon.

You could honestly say that you didn't mind what happened that night and you could say you would like it to happen again. Reading to Nari in the night as you tried to fall asleep. At peace with the world around you and them.

[treasure-hwa]

sparkling wine and cake

pairing: seonghwa x g.neutral reader

genre: fluff

synopsis: Seonghwa could not ask for a better way of spending new year's eve.

word count: 1755

author's note: is it good, you ask me. It's better than nothing, I answer. I should have posted it on January 1st, but I didn't, so enjoy it now, 14 days into the new year.

Winter felt way colder and sadder when there was not a cozy place full of cheerful people to spend new year’s eve. The place Seonghwa lived in felt emotionless and chilly, even though the heater was on.

He focused on baking the chocolate cake he decided to bake just so he could distract himself from the sting burning on his chest. Not being able to spend new year’s eve with his family was painful and the man cursed his boss for demanding, in the last minute, he worked on December 30th and the afternoon of the first day of the year. Seonghwa had booked a flight to his hometown, but, due to work, he had to call it off, and booking a flight on new year's eve was impossible.

His friends were also already busy, and Seonghwa didn't want to bother them, so, that night, it would be only him, the chocolate cake and maybe a glass of sparkling wine toasted with the wind the moment the clock hit 00:00.

It's how it's gonna be, he thought to himself while cleaning the kitchen's counter, it will be fine, I can video call my parents later. But when you least expect, things happen, don't they?

Around 10:30pm, the doorbell rang, and Seonghwa, without hurry, went to the door, getting a big surprise when he opened it.

— Hey, happy new year.

— Y/N?

— I know, it's not 2021 yet, but whatever. Can I come in? I brought some… snacks. — You showed him a convenience store white plastic bag you had on your hand.

— Sure, come in. What did you bring? — You shared a quick hug before the boy took the bag from you, taking it to the kitchen.

You left your shoes and coat, full of little white dots of snow, on the specific places and came into the house, sighing when the warm air welcomed you.

— Sparkling wine, Pringles and chocolate. — You sat on the couch, stretching your legs and your red and green striped sock clad feet.

— Nice. Why are you here? Not trying to be rude, of course — He hurried to correct himself in case you misunderstood him.

— I came here to spend new year's eve with you, Hwa, obviously.

— But why? What about your family? — the man questioned, putting the sparkling wine bottle on the refrigerator and taking out the one he already had, pouring the golden liquid on two glasses.

— Split up. My sister is with her boyfriend, my brother with his friends and mom and dad are with their respective new partners.

— I am sorry, I guess. — Seonghwa came to the living room, sat beside you and handed you the glass, pouting and touching your arm gently with his free hand.

— It's okay. — You smiled and, even though it was kind of a broken one, you seemed content enough, more content when you sipped on the sparkling wine. — At least we are together.

He smiled with the ending words, finally realizing he would start 2021 near someone really important to him.

You and the man met on the train station two years ago. The place was crowded and both were moving to the big city because of great job offers, something they couldn't find in their respective hometowns. Everybody was waiting for cabs and, when one stopped in front of you and you opened the car's door, you saw a breathless guy running towards you.

"Please, let me take this one. I am already so late to meet my new landlord."

"Well, me too, but… we can share the cab, what do you think? I go first, then you go."

He agreed, thanked your gentleness and got into the cab, rearranging his luggage on the available space. Two days later, you met at the local bakery and discovered you lived next to each other. The rest was story.

— Is there cake? Your house smells like cake.

— Yep, I’m just waiting for it to cold down.

A moment of silence.

— What are your plans?

— Watching a movie, eating cake and drinking sparkling wine during the whole night, maybe getting a little drunk. — He shrugged his shoulders. — Sounds good or do you want to do anything else?

— Anything sounds good with you, Hwa.

Maybe Seonghwa had melted and his heart lost a beat. If he was totally honest, he would say he has a crush on you, and what had just been said wasn't exactly healthy for his situation.

Giving a shy smile, he turned the TV on and handed you the remote control to choose something worthy enough of watching during that time of the year. A Christmas themed romcom was just starting, so you decided on watching it, focusing completely. Or it seemed like you were: the man was trying so hard not to wrap his arm around you, who wanted to lay your head on his shoulder so bad.

And why don’t they just do it? Because they do not know the other reciprocates their feelings. Dumb? Yes. What if they get rejected and lose the other’s friendship? It is a no no.

You felt like you were building the courage to rest your body on him, but he got up in the wrong moment, asking if you wanted cake, talking about all the process he went to make it. Externally, you smiled and said “sure”. Mentally, you cursed.

When he came back to the living room, his hands were full with two plates of chocolate cake and a bottle of sparkling wine. After helping him, you were again seated beside each other, trying to fill your minds with something other than the warmth the other was giving away, which was proved incredibly hard for him, since he could not not pay attention on her giggles every time the main couple on the TV did something cute, she kept biting her lips to fight the urge to smile wide, and he did the same because she was so cute while watching romance things — there was a reason why he never got tired of watching k-dramas along with her.

— Hwa… Hwa! — he got out of his own in-love trance after hearing the cause of it calling him. — It’s almost midnight already!

— Is it? What time is it?

— Three minutes to midnight. Come with me.

— What? Where?

You smiled and took his hands. It was now or never. I don’t care if he rejects me, I need him to know my feelings, it’s my new year resolution. You opened the glass door that gave way to the balcony and pushed Seonghwa gently on the side grid.

— Y/N, what are you doing?

— Just wait, okay?

He nodded, hugging you and rubbing your back when he saw you shivering because of the cold. Maybe skinship was not that strong on your relationship, however both of you were okay with it, you kind of wished it would happen often, so every time you touched hands or shared a hug felt like you had ascended to heaven. Your heart felt lighter and you could not help your big smile.

— Too cold? — Seonghwa questioned in a low voice, still rubbing your back with his delicate, big hands. — Should we go back inside.

— A little, but no. I have something to say.

From the TV inside the apartment, you heard a commercial initiating the countdown.

“10, 9, 8…”

You took the man’s hands, holding and caressing them like they were made of crystal. He smiled, not thinking too much of it, just appreciating the physical contact his crush was giving him.

Now or never. Now or never. Now or never!

— I like you, Hwa! Please, accept my feelings.

“7, 6, 5…”

He said nothing, too shocked to form words. Nevertheless, you kept going:

— I’m going to kiss you now. You can push me away if you want.

“4, 3…”

— Would never dare. — He breathed out the three words and cupped your face.

“2, 1… Happy new year!”

You took a step forward, gently tugging on his neck so your lips could meet in the most desired kiss in the past months. Your lips fit his plump and pinkish ones perfectly, as it was meant to be. His mouth tasted sweet, both from the cake and the sparkling wine. His hands held your face fearing it was a dream. Fireworks exploded in the sky, as it did in your stomachs.

However, you broke the kiss to hide your face on Seonghwa’s shoulder, and not knowing what happened, he hugged and asked loud enough to be heard:

— What’s wrong? Did I do something you didn’t like?

— I don’t like fireworks. Too loud!

Without wasting more time, he took you back inside and closed the balcony door. Leaving you on the couch, Seonghwa went to the kitchen and got the other bottle of sparkling wine, opening it without making a mess, and the Pringles and chocolate you had brought. He put those things on top of the center table and filled your glasses, proposing a toast in the name of the new year.

— It brought me love already, so I just want peace, health and success for the world.

— Cheers! — You lifted your glass happily, but got scared by another loud firework.

Chuckling, he sat beside you and finally cuddled your body on his.

— No need to be scared, I’m here to protect you now.

— My hero — you joked, sipping your gold alcoholic drink to hide your nervousness. He kissed me because he likes me too, right? He said he would never dare to push me away, so it is reciprocated, right?

Interrupting your thoughts, Seonghwa pecked your lips, cupping your face and pulling away before you could even notice.

— I didn’t say it outside, but I like you too, and if you want the first change of the year… I can be it for you.

Was it really happening?

— Pinch me first. — Giggling, he pinched and kissed your cheek. — Definitely real. I want it.

— Happy new year, Hwa.

— Happy new year, dear.

And this was how they spent the night: drinking sparkling wine and mixing Pringles, chocolate and cake, stealing quick shy salty and sweet pecks from each other. Finally, two lonely hearts met and began to beat in sync.

- [happy new year] -

[addictofsupernatural]

Spidey Senses (pt. 4)

Peter Parker x reader

Summary: You and your friends prepare to go to a costume party, and Peter has conflicting feelings.

Word Count: 2917

Chapter 1 • Chapter 3 • Chapter 5

Peter stayed up at night thinking about you. He couldn't explain it. You were the only one on his mind for some unexplainable reason. The hotel room was the first time in a while you two slept together, and it was different from how he remembered. It didn't feel like sleeping in the same room with a sister that he slightly remembered as a kid. It made him feel weird.

You were so warm. You had your natural smell you always had, but it smelled a lot better than he remembered. A lot more calming. He could sense your happiness at full prime, and your sad ones too. You had a lot of happy emotions earlier this day, both in the hotel room and during the fight. It was hard to describe, but spending the day with you made him feel so warm.

And you and Tony's friendship. Peter did always love your sarcastic side, and he was so proud of you for showing it to Tony. You were so awesome. He's always thought you were awesome. So why did you feel different right now?

You were weirdly a lot prettier in his mind. His spidey sense was buzzing around you. He felt happy when you laughed. The feeling was still lingering by just thinking about it. And when you had your nightmare, he felt almost in physical pain himself.

Maybe it's just your spidey senses clashing with each other. Maybe it's the puberty kicking in? It's probably nothing. He just needs to go to sleep... Anytime now...

The next morning Peter ate his breakfast in a daze. "What's wrong Peter?" Aunt May asked. You're all spaced out."

"I don't know. Just thinking."

"Uh oh." She teased as he sat down. "About what? That Liz girl?"

"No. Y/n actually." He didn't realize how misleading that came out.

"Well finally. I was wondering when you'd realize your feelings for her."

"What?! Aunt May, no! That's not what I meant at all."

"Oh." She blankly said. "Then forget everything I just said. Have a nice day at school."

Meanwhile, you woke up back in your empty apartment with no excitement. As you ate your breakfast in silence, you felt like an idiot. How could you be so rude to Tony Stark? He was being nice in his own way. What the hell is wrong with you?

Your landlord then knocked on your door, giving you a huge suitcase and telling you that it was left for you by someone named Happy. You thanked him and opened it. It was clothing. A bunch of nice, expensive looking clothing. They were weirdly your style; they weren't flashy and didn't show off any brands. There was a card as well.

Hey kid. I might've came across as a rich jerk. That's not what I meant to be. Here's a little something so you don't look homeless. You're welcome. Also, here's Happy's number. Xxx-xxx-xxxx. Don't still be mad at me. Nobody likes a petty person. And besides, you're my favorite "other kid". Keep in touch. -TS

You smiled and put on a pair of clothes, texting Happy to thank Tony and for Happy to keep you posted about Tony and him.

You then walked to Peter's, waiting on the steps as usual. You smiled when he stepped out, and to your surprise, he just began to walk straight ahead instead of saying anything. "Woah, Peter wait up. You okay?"

"Uh, yeah. Think so." He only gave you a glance.

"If you wanna talk, you know I'm all ears." You offered, and he took another glance at your beautiful smile, only making him more nervous.

"No, no it's okay. I'm okay."

"Oh." You quietly said. He was being so weird to you. Why wouldn't he look at you? "I didn't do anything, did I?"

"No!" He said too quickly.

"You can be honest with me Peter. I hope you know that." You only looked down, and he held his gaze to you for the first time today. "I'm really sorry if I did something. I just hope we can fix it so things won't be weird."

"What? No, I swear you don't need to worry. It's really not you. It's me. I'm... Going through puberty. Seeing things and people, uh, differently. Sorry if I'm being weird." His voice cracked on the word weird.

You giggled. "Oh. That's totally okay. I wonder if your spidey senses are out of wack from it."

"My what?"

"Your spidey senses. That's what I'm calling it. Aunt May calls it something else though, I just forgot what."

"No, you don't need to repeat what she calls it!"

You were genuinely curious. "Why not? Maybe it's a better name for us to—"

"I'm not letting you call it that!" He cut you off. Peter would be damned if you called your instinctive feelings your Peter Tingle. "I like spidey senses. It's cool and cute. Now what do you mean by it being out of wack?"

You figured if Aunt May's nickname for your sixth sense was truly that embarrassing for him then he wouldn't tell you, so you just dropped it.

"I was just wondering if your powers gets affected by puberty."

"How, how did you deal with puberty and your powers?"

"Oh, I started my period long before the spider bite. That could've been so sucky." He made a face, and you chuckled. "Right, no p word. Sorry."

"It's fine. Just don't want to think about it."

You sighed. "Me neither. I wish I had that option."

He smiled as his eyes drifted towards your clothes. "Did Mr. Stark get you those?"

You looked down at your outfit. "Yeah actually. I guess I didn't scare him off after all."

"I guess not." You nudged each other's arm to tease. "I have the check he made to you. I think you should take it. It could make him happy."

"Yeah, okay. Thanks Peter. You always have my back."

As he stared at your smile and sensed your happiness, he had that weird feeling in him again. What was it? It didn't matter. Peter was going to push away those feelings and focus on school, Liz, and Spiderman.

Later on that day you got a text from Happy, saying that Tony accepts your apology, and to fill in on what's going on once a week for him and Tony. You did, and you could tell he cared. He would sometimes tell you a little something about his day or week. He was indeed becoming a good friend.

A few months passed and you and Peter adjusted to your new superhero lives well together. You and Happy texted each other at least once a week, and gave Peter Happy's number out of request. Tony was given information Happy thought he should know, and Tony was secretly happy to be hearing about how well you and Peter were doing. It made him feel like he was protecting you two from a distance.

One day at lunch Flash came up to you and began to gross you out yet again. "Hey girl, what're you doing next Friday night?"

"I don't know. I might take an extra shift at work. Not everybody has a silver spoon down their throats." You had a hint of annoyance to your words.

"Are you saying you need someone like me to take care of you?"

"I'm saying I might have to work because I actually earn the things I get in life Flash."

"Well not when you're someone like me you doesn't really have to worry about working hard on things. It comes naturally." He leaned on the table and shoved away Peter's backpack that was a seat holder, causing you to throw him a dirty look.

"What were you going to ask me Flash?" You kept your voice calm.

"Just wanted to know if you were coming to my party next Friday. Y'know, maybe show up to see me."

"I would never go anywhere to see you Flash."

"C'mon, I'm rich, you got a nice body, let's make other people jealous. I can make some dreams come true. It's not like you don't need the money."

"You didn't even care that I existed until a few months ago." You glared at him. This was a proper asshole. Now you knew.

"That's because it was when you started wearing better clothes. Now that I know there's a hottie under all that nerd, I can get behind it."

"The answer is no. Leave me alone!" You said a little more forcefully. People were beginning to stare, and Flash's face became red. No one said no to him.

"Okay, what's it gonna take to get you there?" He leaned in and asked quietly.

"Is anyone from Mathletes gonna come?"

"Yeah. I invited Liz and she told some other people in the club to come."

"Then I'll only go if I can bring Ned and Peter."

He scoffed. "Yeah, I guess."

"Okay then. We'll be there." He sighed in relief. Nobody says no to him, and still haven't.

Your annoyed expression forced itself to a barely there smile when Peter and Ned walked to your table. "Why was Flash talking to you?" Ned asked.

"I guess we're going to a party next Friday." Peter looked confused while Ned couldn't be more happy.

"Oh my God We can be, like, cool now!"

"Why would you say yes to a party from Flash?" Peter asked.

"Liz will be there." Peter's body language changed. "It's a costume party, so you guys find yourselves something to wear."

"You say it like your not going." Peter said, slightly disappointed.

"I'll probably go to make an appearance and leave." You said as you stared at your school food.

"But it won't be the same without you." Peter frowned and shook his head.

"Peter's actually pretty true about that." Ned contently nodded.

"I just don't want to go there. That's it."

"Why are you short today?" Peter blankly asked. What's wrong?"

"Nothing." You said. You then got up and dumped your food in the trash. "I'm gonna go to the restroom. Bye."

As you quickly walked off, Mj spoke up from the other end of the table. "You two are idiots."

"What did we do?" Ned sceptically asked.

"It's what Flash did. It's obvious that he said something to make her feel like crap. When is he not a rich narcissist?" Peter shot up and quickly went after you by hearing that.

"He's an even bigger idiot." Mj said.

"Yeah, but he'll figure it out someday." Ned shrugged, getting up and going after you too.

You got to the bathroom and put a bunch of paper towels on the corner of the floor. You set your backpack on the floor and sat down. You take out your phone and send a text to Happy, not really knowing who else to talk to. You usually only text him to give each other check ups, rarely actually communicating back and forth.

You: What do you do when a rich asshole makes you feel like you're worth shit?

You stared at your phone and scoffed. Don't be stupid. He's busy. You put your head in your knees. Why do people still get to you? Liz has a ton of money. You wondered if she ever had anything to be ashamed about.

People only started looking at you once you started wearing the clothes Tony got you. Most weren't even revealing at all, they just looked expensive. This was a different feeling. You used to feel ugly and invisible. Now you just feel like a piece of meat. You couldn't tell which feeling was worse. You then heard a buzz.

Bestie: What's his name? I swear I can scare the living crap out of him.

You smiled. He did care. You then saw another message.

Bestie: Also watch your language

You giggled.

You: You didn't answer my question

Bestie: Sometimes you just have to be the bigger person. Once they realize who's actually better, you get both their pride and your better life.

Looks like you really did have a friend.

You: Thanks Happy

Bestie: You didn't answer my question

You grinned.

You: Just some guy at school

You: Doesn't matter

You: I feel better now

Bestie: Good

Bestie: And I don't care what you say, Tony's going to be hearing about this.

You: Ugh traitor

It was embarrassing, but it wasn't like Tony would actually do anything. It's not like he'd drop everything and fly out here. He's a busy man, he's got more to worry about than you being bullied.

"Y/n, are you in there?" Peter asked from the other side of the door.

"We came to see if you were okay." Ned chimed in. You got up and went outside, looking at them confused. "I had to convince Peter not to barge in. I think those two girls passing by think we're creeps now."

"Aww you guys looked like peepers for me?" You pulled them in for a group hug. "I'm fine now. Thanks though."

Ned then spoke up again. "Are you still gonna leave us at the party? Cause we totally understand if–"

"If you guys want me to go, I'll go." They both hugged you again.

After school you walked to Delmar's Deli-Grocery. "Hey Del."

"Llegas una hora antes prima. No te pago horas extras." He said, his back turned.

("You're an hour early cousin. I'm not paying you overtime." He said, his back turned.)

"Relax primo, I'm just gonna do some homework in the back before my shift."

As you did, Delmar called for you. "Prima, someone's here to see you."

"Who is it, Peter?" You asked as you walked out. You then saw Tony stare at you with an unreadable face. "Damnit."

"Why does he call you that?"

"What?"

"Primuh– whatever. Why does he call you that?"

"It's a nickname."

"What does it mean?"

"It means cousin."

"So you two are related?"

"No, we're just that close."

"Can I call you that?"

"Can you pronounce it correctly?"

"Ouch."

"So what's up Mr. Stark."

"I thought it was just Tony."

"I don't know. It's a little unprofessional."

"Do we only have a professional friendship?"

"Are we even friends?"

"You tell me. You stole Happy from me apparently."

"Aye, it's like a mom's new boyfriend trying to get her kid's trust." Delmar said in the back.

"Little loud back there Del." You said.

"Happy told me about this kid. Does he mess with you a lot?"

"He messes with Peter more."

"You didn't answer me."

"Yeah, maybe. Is that really why you came out here?"

He furrowed his brows. "Is that hard to believe?"

"Um, yeah?"

"I've seen a ton of bullies as Iron Man, and I take things like this seriously."

You let out a breathy chuckle. "Tony that's war fare and alien stuff. This is just highschool."

"So? I don't take kindly to people who mess with my friends."

You couldn't stop the smile from coming to your face. Did you really just make friends with some important middle aged men? The thought was laughable. "So, will that be all Mr. Stark?"

"You know I don't like that. Stop." You giggled. "You didn't tell Happy what was going on with you this week."

You shrugged. "I guess I'm going to a costume party next Friday. It's gonna be at the ass wipe's house."

"See, I can do something about that. Okay, I got a date with Pep in a few hours so I'll see you and Peter tomorrow."

"Wait what? Why?"

"Um, so you two can get into costume design and later fitting? Whoever that kid is will be jealous of your costume, and you get to wear a cute couple costume with Peter."

"Happy told me I should just be the bigger person." You teased.

"Yeah, and you will be by being the better dressed person." He smiled at you.

"I knew you had a crush on Peter." Delmar said at the counter. You gave him a dirty look. He glanced at his watch. "You're 2 minutes late. Hurry up."

"Alright, that's my cue." Tony said. "Nice clothes by the way."

"Thanks." You said cheerfully. "My friend gave them to me."

"Wow he had good taste. Well, see you tomorrow kid." And with that he left.

You went to the back and caught the apron Delmar harshly threw at you. He gave you an intense stare. "What?"

"What the hell is wrong with you? Why would you take a job like this when you're hanging around billionaires?"

"I like this job. And I'm not a gold digger. He's just really persistent and there's no point of arguing."

"I should fire you for arguing with me so much." He called out.

"Keep it up and I'll stop covering some of your shifts."

"Mmh." He rolled his eyes and you contently smiled, starting work.

Later on that night you suited up, going to Peter's apartment and crawling up to his window. You opened it and crawled on the wall, closing the window. You hopped to the floor and pulled off your mask. "Peter, we need to talk. Tony just saw me today and–"

You stared face to face with a panic looking Peter in his boxers and a surprised Ned.

---

Author Note: Just so everybody knows this is my own au where Peter accidentally sent the video of you two to May and had a very interesting phone call with the both of you. I totally forgot to write this and just wrote this message after I posted this chapter. Maybe I'll make a little short of that idk.

---

Tag List:

@flawlessapollo6 @them-cute-boys @lunawndrlnd @the-greatt-perhaps @babebenhardy @sofisofi1602 @smilexcaptainx @herondalism @coni-martina @youvebeenlizzed

[imma-new-soul]

The Sky Had Fire

Chapter 4

Summary: Bucky x Reader. Being a traveler you've found many beautiful places but this trip you might have found your soulmate (Takes place sometime before CACW) au

Warning: Alcohol consumption, kissing maybe?

Series Masterlist

An explosion went off sending a sound wave through the building. Fear struck you, it held your body in place your feet were nailed to the floor boards. The room went dim while the gold slivers of the southeastern sun sripped through the blinds. You stood in fear for a moment just one moment before realizing the cause of the sound.

You opened the door to your balcony letting in the sweet smell of the air, brushing past your face. You looked out to the cables and pole directly in the corner of the street and saw smoke emanating from the box at the tip of the pole. The building that you now resigned in was pulling to much energy from the transformer outside than it was capable of giving off managing to blow it out. The landlord told you that this would happen sometimes, that power outages in this area was fairly common.

Even though the sun sat high and bright in the sky your windows were positioned opposite to the source of light and you knew there was no way you would be able cook with the lack of light. So you grabbed your keys and descended down the stairs. Heading quickly to a store to pick up some candles and matches. You crossed the still bustling streets dodging the people walking opposite of you and heading to a local restaurant. It took all but 15 mins till the food you orded was ready and in your hand. After a short walk to your apartment you places the food down on the counter and kicked off your shoes.

It was almost completely dark in the room now as the errans you ran spent most of the daylight. Rummaging through the plastic bags that sat at waist level of you on the cold counter, you fished out the matches and placed a few candles in random spots of the apartment lighting each one carefully. You were please by the fact that you were able to find vanilla scented candles, the smell filled the air quickly as they burned slow.

Time was drawing close to when Bucky would arrive and you grew more and more nervous. A pit starting to form in your gut and your throat became dry. You wouldn't even consider him a friend yet he was just your very sweet hot neighbor but you were nervous none the less.

Exactly at 7pm you heard a gentle knock on your door and it was like you had stage fright, your knees felt weak, your heartrate sped up and your plams were sweating. Taking one last second to fix your hair and adjust your clothes.

You stepped to the hall opening the door for Bucky. Your heart went from racing a mile a minute to caught right in your throat. He was by far the best looking guy you've ever seen so you figured the effect he had on you was normal. He stood there with a charming smile, wine in one hand the other hand buried in the pocket of his jeans.

"I wasn't sure if you drank but I had this wine for a while and no one to share it with so I thought I'd bring it over " Bucky said in a meak voice.

When you asked him to come over for dinner tonight Bucky wasn't sure if it was a date or not but what he was sure of was that sometimes you took his breath away and when you held his hand he felt sparks that he hasn't felt I'm a long time or probably even ever. Bucky wanted to go out and get you flowers but he thought it would be to much so he went with wine. Friends have wine right? He thought. soon it was to late to change his mind so he just brought the bottle hoping you wouldn't think it was weird.

"I think wine is just what I need actually" you said and Buckys smile grew wider.

You flashed Bucky a sweet smile back not sure if you should hug him or not, you kept replaying in your mind how close you almost got to kissing him the other night. How maybe if you got the opportunity again you would actually go for it this time. You shook your head trying to clear your mind of your racing thoughts and moved to the side to let him in. Bucky slide in by you softly brushing his body against yours and you held your breath once again longing for more contact.

He looked around placing the bottle down and peeling his jacket off. For a dinner between two people who just meet the place looked pretty romantic. Your place was warm and inviting, The flicker of the flames on the candles casted beautiful shadows on the walls behind them, it smelled of vanilla but the smell of you was never masked by the candles. Bucky loved your smell it intoxicated him, he thought about since the first encounter he had with you, he wanted it to be the first thing he smelled when he wakes up, he wanted to smell you on his clothes, on his sheets and on his skin.

You set the table placing a plate of food in front of Bucky and one were you'd be sitting. You didn't have wine glasses but a simple small glass cup would do just fine. The food smelled delicious and definetly tasted better then anything you would have made.

"I'm sorry I couldn't get to cook because of the power outage I hope you like Chinese" you said squinting your eyebrows in worry. Bucky thought it was cute.

"I figured it would be hard to get anything done in the dark, don't worry Chinese is actually my favorite" he replied reassuring you.

Bucky poured you some wine and then himself. One cup became 4 or 5 you had lost count in between the intreging stories Bucky told. After dinner the two of you sat on the couch rapped up in endless conversations. Though the sun had set long ago there was a warm summer sky in his blue eyes. The faded glow of the night kissed his skin and made it silk. His voice was a smooth love song passing by your ears. Bucky talked and talked while you unregretfully stared at him feeling drunk not on the wine but on him.

He sat so close to you his arm on the cushion behind your head and his knees grazed yours from time to time. You noticed that every once in a while Buckys gaze would wonder from your eyes down to your lips and back up. You couldn't take it anymore everything inside of you wanted to jump on him and stratle his lap. A devious flame sparked in you and in the middle of Buckys sentence both your hands grabbed the fabric of his shirt that sat on his toned chest. You pulled him in furiously kissing him.

Your liquid courage didn't steer you wrong because in response Bucky desperately kissed you back. Passion and lust dripped off him he pulled your waist towards him pushing your back down onto the couch and hovered above you lips and tongue still tangled in each other. You felt a slow burn in your skin peaking through leaving your cheeks a warm rose color.

This night was turning out to be much more then you bargained for.

@sebbbystaaan

[pbandjesse]

Today was a pretty good day off. Mostly lazy. It started with a lot of anxiety for me though.

I slept all right and I woke up at around 9. I wanted to go to the mall. I was determined to go to the mall. But I also knew that the landlord was going to be coming around in the afternoon. I wasn't sure what time but I wanted to make sure it was here. So I started getting ready.

One of the issues that I'm having in this apartment is that there's too much space. So when I'm going from the bedroom to the bathroom I have to pass through another room which then reminds me that I need to do something else and then I go to the kitchen to start doing that thing and then realize that I'm passing another room and I see something else that needs to get done. And then it's just a horrible cycle. I get very stressed out by how many things that need to be done. I had to get dressed I had to water the plants I had to feed the cats I had to eat breakfast so many things. All of them got done though and it was fine I was just stressed for no reason.

James texted me and told me that there was a package over at the other apartment I had to go pick up. So I left here around 9:30 and did that. I got the mail there and package which turned out to be a cat stuffed animal for me. And I came back here. I was very overheated though. There's not a lot of Hills but it's hot outside and I had a lot of trouble picking an outfit today cuz I was too hot. And the shorts I decided on hurt my legs when I was biking. So I got back here and I got changed. And just kind of stood in front of the air conditioner. It helped but I was very uncomfortable.

I only stayed here long enough to cool off and then I left again. I biked to the subway because I thought that would be my best bet for getting to the mall. That's how I've always gotten to the mall. Turns out it's only like a 12 minute bike ride. I'm very annoyed about this because I waited for the subway for almost a half an hour. I felt very stupid. And I didn't even have cell service down there so I didn't realize how short of a bike ride it was until later on. At least I have an interesting podcast to listen to. It could have been worse.

But because of the long way and the Heat by the time I got to the mall I was kind of just sad and felt kind of weird. I want a Forever 21 but I didn't really want to look at clothes. And that Mal has not got a lot of things in it. Did you have a Claire's though. And they were having their 3-4-3 sale. And I went in and wasn't going to get anything but then I saw that they had the Platypus Beanie Baby that I had seen on the boardwalk. The one that I couldn't find. And so I got it and some nail polish and a present for Jess. It was nice. Help me feel a little bit better.

I got a pretzel. Finally. I actually got two pretzels and brought them home with me. I've been kind of snacking on them all day. Say microwave pretty well. And then I just kind of wandered. I started to leave and then I realized it was 11:30 and I hadn't had breakfast yet. I was saving the pretzels for later. So I look to see where I Burger King was because I had seen someone with a cup from it. Turns out it was in the mall just kind of setback so I didn't see it. I went in and I want to order the veggie burger always get. Only to find out that even though it's on their menu they no longer carry it because of the impossible Burger. Wonderful. I can't eat the impossible Burger. I've tried it multiple times now and two of the three times I've tried it I've gotten sick. So I don't trust it. And I really like the veggie burger at Burger King. Explain the girl why I can't have it and she told me I should fill out the survey. So we did and just said that I was disappointed. I got fries and a soda and sat down. But I just felt very sad. I just wanted to go home.

Thankfully waiting for the Subway on the way back wasn't as long. It was still really hard to bike home and the Heat. And I promised myself I would get a cold bath as soon as I was home.

And that's exactly what I did. I got him cold baths and I had my pretzel. Eventually I had a burrito. I just tried to enjoy my afternoon.

Our landlady, Tina, texted me that she was running late. Originally when she had called me when I first got home she said she would be there around 3:30 or 4. But her sister's car had broken down and she had to drive her somewhere so she would be here closer to 5. That's cool I wasn't planning on going anywhere.

But then I hit kind of a mid-afternoon slump and I got incredibly tired. I set an alarm for 4:30 just in case I fell asleep. I just felt exhausted.

I went downstairs to get a package. It was a bunch of small stuff from my mom. But she also apparently sent me an envelope. And that wasn't there yet so later on a little bit before 5 I open the door to go downstairs. But when I did I saw that the office door that is the apartment next door to me was open and there was a huge bag of peaches on the table in the hallway. I assumed that meant the landlady was there so I just went back in my apartment.

And I was right! Tina knocked on my door a couple minutes after 5 with the big bag of peaches. She brought them for me and James. She is so sweet. I want to give her a big hug. She reminds me of my dad's Aunt Ellen. An older lady probably mid-70s. Crepe paper skin and glasses. She had earrings and a necklace and a bracelet on. She has short blond hair that was kind of curled. And I just think she's so sweet. We sat and talked for about a half an hour. She gave me the lease and she told me the history of the building. At least what she knows.

Her and her ex-husband bought this home years ago. They lived here on the first floor and in this apartment before she had kids. And after they had kids they moved West Virginia and started renting the place. The building itself was built in 1904 and I was right about it being a family that owns a department store downtown. They commissioned the building when they got married. And then they left for 6 months. When they got back they started their life but the wife died a few years later they think in childbirth. He was very sad and so he moved to the building next door. The one that's an old person's home now. At least we think it's an old person's home. But that building was filled with artists and art collectors at that time. Just filled with that kind of energy. He continued to own the home for a while and rent it out. It changed hands two more times at least before Tina and her husband at the time bought it. And my favorite thing that you told me was that turns out the apartment I'm living in was the original owners Billiards room. I think that is hilarious.

It was really nice to talk to her though and she said the sign the lease when we get a chance. To contact her if we have any questions. The only real question I have now that I've read over the lease has there's a clause in it that says we can only have white curtains. And I want to check about that. Cuz that seems bizarre. But it is a standard lease that she just got from the library so maybe she doesn't know that it says that.

After she left I ate one of the peaches and it was incredible. Like I literally ate the entire thing it was falling off of the pit. It was great. And then I just kind of hang out for a bit. Enjoyed being in the apartment.

Eventually I worked on some art. The kitty cat James gave me I went to pick up earlier had very strange eyes. So I tried to call her the man. But that looked worse. So I removed them and put new ones on. At least fixed the size and placement. I like it a lot better now. And then I worked on some aren't and I had pizza for dinner. I just had a nice night. I miss James. He's at a baseball game right now. The whole reason for his trip. I hope he's having a good time up in Boston. He sent me pictures of the museum he was at today. And he promised me a souvenir. I look forward to having him back.

I'm laying in bed now. Sweet pea is manhandling my stuffed animals. And being a nuisance. But I'm really just ready to get some sleep.

I work at the Museum tomorrow. And then James comes back. And then it supposed to be D&D. I look forward to seeing our friends. I hope you guys all have a nice day tomorrow. Be safe. Take care of each other.

[shehasworktodo]

"Enkrateia" Part 1

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law." -Galatians 5: 22 & 23

"Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." -Romans 15:13

Once Upon a Time in Miami...

I was taking an Uber back to my hotel one morning. I wasn't expecting it but I felt this strange heaviness in my chest. I just spent the last two days with a really cool guy that I met in the area, and knowing that I was leaving Miami soon made me sad. We both knew it wasn't something that was going to last forever, but that didn't mean it hurt any less.

Before this, I was celebrating turning 24 with a close friend that lived in Fort Lauderdale. Other than a couple old girlfriends, my former landlord, and my mom, most of my friends had forgotten my birthday. Overall I'm so thankful for my friend making that weekend so special for me, but I would be lying to you and myself if I said that I wasn't in my feelings about everyone else. On top of that I was fighting to overcome two short-lived dating relationships that I truly saw potential in. I was lacking in faith, I was lacking in trust, and at this point, I was in Miami just saying f*ck it. I wanted to have fun and let go of the bad feelings that were tormenting me. And it turned out to be a great trip!

On days where I found myself lonely and bored, I'd go to my re-upped dating app profiles and that's where I linked with this one energetic, Star-Wars loving guy that made a Monday and Tuesday feel like a whirlwind of a weekend. It was one of those situations where a guy showers you with attention, gets what he wants, and disappears without a trace. But kudos to him, he was straight forward with his intentions from the first day, after he made his pass. Needless to say we only fooled around, but still after loss of contact it was enough to make me feel like I lost a piece of myself in those two short days.

Never did I ever see myself in these kinds of situations: Meeting someone, getting to know them, regardless of pure intentions we act like we're in a relationship when we aren't, and instead of a fizzling out it comes to a complete stop- a halt without any warning or heads-up. You fall flat on your face wondering what happened and where things went wrong. Better yet, "what did I do wrong in order for them to treat me this way?".

The title stems from a new word that I learned from this book I read called How Should a Christian Date? by Eric Demeter. Although I haven't dated a lot of "Christians" in my past, I've always had goals and a solid mindset in what I look for- and who I want to be- in a relationship. The first time I ever dated anyone seriously I was 20 years old and it ended in a horrific way. It's a story for another day, but I didn't have any idea of what a healthy relationship looked like. Although I had my boundaries and standards that I upheld, I always found myself compromising and bending over backwards to make him feel comfortable, to please him, that any question or concern that I have I should just keep my mouth shut. After I learned about heartbreak and what it felt like, my encounters with dating have always been touch and go. I blamed my actions and mindset on past dating experiences, and for that I knew I was wrong.

Enkrateia is a Biblical Greek word that means self-control, or power over one's self. Wikipedia defines it further as "... power over your own passions and instincts, self-control and self-mastery." So when I started dating in LA, I couldn't blame my actions and choices on anyone but myself. I have no control over what anyone else thinks or does, but I know that my heart and intentions are pure. Trust me when I tell you that after dating one guy for almost a month, when things are going so nicely, I was so dumbfounded in wondering why this guy disappeared out of the blue. Offering to pick me up on our first date, driving us to and from the venue, opening and closing doors, going out of his way to make sure that I was happy and content... it was something I wasn't used to. After his disappearance I went back on with my life, only to find out two weeks later that his grandmother had passed away. Even though there's no excuse for treating someone the way that he treated me, I can understand that people grieve differently. I was going through a moment of bereavement myself and he was one of the first people I told. We made an attempt at patching things up (by we I mean me), and even after meeting up again, the text responses took longer and my phone calls were never answered. Silly me, I thought I had something nice going and ended up looking like a fool twice. That was the one time I ever got to reflect on myself by asking him what I did to deserve to be ignored. I was shocked when he told me I did nothing wrong.. it sure felt like it. At the end of the day there's nothing I could've done to help him fight his demons. I was not responsible for the way that he chose to treat me.

With my second dating experience about a month later, I took a break from checking off "boxes" but continued to put my faith and values on the table. It was like an "expect the best but prepare for the worst" kind of situation. To top it off I don't think I had any expectations, just a couple nice laid back dates with a nice guy. I admired his consistency in communication and his transparency, but he put more emphasis on "hooking up" than actually getting to know each other and finding something real, what we initially talked about. Since I wasn't expecting much, I made my own decision to fool around without overstepping my boundaries. The only thing I could reflect on about this brief relationship was his choice of timing in telling me he couldn't move forward knowing that I didn't plan on, in nice terms, giving him more anytime soon. He was so bent on the physical that I didn't really get more of a chance to know his soul... and he didn't get to know mine. I let him know that despite our short lived good times, I would've been more than fine with never being physical for a long time if it meant I just got to know him as a person. Although things ended amicably, this guy was going back and forth with my emotions about "linking up" and "cumming thru" which did not entertain me in the slightest.

You can probably see why I threw caution to the wind in Miami after these moments. I made another promise to myself after all these encounters. There's no sense in me making meaningless connections with someone I don't intend to fully pursue and love. I know personally, when my body is involved, so is my heart. My emotions and physical interactions cannot be separated, that's just how I was designed. I know better than to be bitter about these situations although they hurt, but after reading this book and learning more about self-control, I know that I have the power to sail my ship while the Lord directs my path. I have found gems in my past dating life. The first guy- the literal "gentleman" I'm thankful for, because ultimately he set the bar for my future dates and relationships. I won't be pressured into doing anything I don't want to, and he never once made me feel that way. In addition, regardless of how invested I am into the relationship, I know how much I'm worth and I know that I deserve to be treated well. I'm thankful for the second man I dated, because ultimately he taught me how important and valuable it is to communicate. His honesty, transparency, and communication skills have encouraged me to accept nothing less from anyone else crossing my path. I can only work on being the best that I can be, and I will not hold myself responsible for the way that others treat me if I know in my heart and show through my actions that they deserve all my attention, respect, and love.

"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind". - II Timothy 1: 7

I'll continue to show that through all my endeavors. Good, pure hearts still exist in this world, and we'll continue to encounter them one day at a time. Each and every one of us knows who we are and what we bring to the table, some of us are still figuring those things out. Leave with this: Know your worth, know your boundaries, and never stop seeing the gems in the people that you meet along your journey.

Look out for Part 2, how I almost lost my life at a Marshmello concert...