#but i understand that some people might have due to hyperfixations and its understandable

[jun-hug]

considering the vid I think it's time to ad a third participant to my advent calendar 😁 guess who

[broadwaybalogna]

Hyperfixations: what they are, how they work, and why they’re unhealthy

A PSA about my relationship with hyperfixations and why someone should get help if they’re experiencing something similar.

So, if you’ve seen me on this site/app, it’s probably been due to my massive love for Zutara and Katara. If you see me now, I almost barely use this site other than to reblog one or two Zutara posts I like. This is the result of an extremely unhealthy hyperfixation I had with Zutara.

A hyperfixation is pretty much exactly what it sounds like, but it’s easiest to explain it by breaking it up: a fixation is something a person is solely focuses on for a duration of time. This is often compared to a light obsession toward something. Most people can have fixations. It’s very easy to become enamored with something and make it a sole focus for maybe a day or two. The hyper aspect is what changes everything and why hyperfixations are most commonly associated with neurodivergent or autistic individuals.

Going from a fixation to a hyperfixation is easy to visualize. Imagine all the aspects of a fixation- just 10x more obsessive. A hyperfixation is basically the more unhealthy version of a fixation. I clearly remember myself staying up until 4-5am each night writing, drawing, and consuming Zutara content. It took up my every thought (seriously, almost all my thoughts consisted of Zutara. I could be at the beach and daydream about Zutara having a beach date, I would go shopping and look for Zutara/Katara merchandise, it took my my entire focus.)

There was nothing anyone could do to take my focus away. I was aware, in retrospect, that what I was doing wasn’t good for myself, but I was too obsessed to stop myself and take a break. That’s why when the hyperfixation finally died down, I almost left this site in its entirety. It was a sharp transition from hyperfixation to small preference; this is in large part also due to the fact that I began taking ADHD medication.

The medication I had stopped my hyperfixation, but it didn’t help any other factors that contributed to my attention deficit disorder, so I was on and off a variety of meds for a month or two.

When I finally stopped obsessing over these two, however, I was able to get good sleep, I was able to eat better, and I was able to better focus on what I needed to do rather than wanted to do.

Now, just because I’m not as crazy about Zutara as I was, it doesn’t mean I don’t like the ship at all anymore. My hyperfixation had to stem from a regular fixation/interest in order for it to get to the intensity that it got to, but I do think it is incredibly important to spread awareness about how unhealthy I was and how it manifested on this site.

From March 26th to August 5th, I wrote a total of 25 fanfictions and 40k words surrounding Zutara. That’s 2.5 fanfictions per week. Not to mention everything I was reading and consuming as well. I was also drawing. I made about 20 drawings with an average of maybe 1.5 hours spent on each one.

I was aware of the fact that what was happening to me was unhealthy, but I was so obsessed I didn’t want to stop. I actually didn’t want to take my meds because I didn’t want my hyperfixation to end.

That’s how bad things can get.

I hope this is helping to understand just how out of control something can become. The ONLY way I was able to stop was by taking prescribed medication that literally sends signals to my brain to stfu and leave me alone.

If this post has helped you realize that you may be suffering from some form of a hyperfixation or other ADHD related symptoms, please take the time to research and schedule an appointment with a doctor so you can be properly diagnosed and medicated. These kinds of obstacles that neurodivergent people face have many ranges and it’s important to realize that help might be needed.

Please please please do what’s best for you if you think you may be facing a similar problem. Because it is a problem, and it can hurt.

I hope this post was able to do good to some people. I really don’t want to imagine people in a place where I was where everything in my brain was so clouded aside from a ship.

P.S: this post is not a resignation of mine for Tumblr and my love for Zutara. It’s acting also as kind of an explanation for why I have been very inactive as of late.

[genderstealer2000]

How do you start gender hoarding? I know that it might sound like a stupid question, but you see, I live in a place where trans people and nbs are looked down upon but lesbians and gays are ok. (rural Australia)

I felt weird coming out to my bf as a demigirl( I am AFAB) and he knows I’m a furry, but doesn’t know about my alter humanity (questioning therian)

So my view of gender is very “traditional” and where I live there’s only really female, male, trans and (very rare) nonbinary. I also have highly suspected autism/ self diagnosed yet I don’t see gender in a way I hear people with autism do, probably due to my upbringing

I want to know from a person like you who knows the “newer” ways of gender how I should gender hoard and not stick myself to just the traditional genders

its not a stupid question at all!! ill do my best to answer! so i identify as agender transmasc. agender goes under the trans umbrella and nonbinary, but i dont see myself as gender neutral i just have no gender. now going more into the transmasc, just means i feel more masculine. doesnt really effect the way i present my gender any differently, hmm i guess i dont really know how to explain it. i dont understand the concept of gender, i dont understand a lot of social constructs, i honestly think its sort of unneeded. my gender is complex in the most noncomplex way, its vast and its tiny. ive made my own genders based off of feelings and intrests, i think thats the best way to get started with genderhoarding. making your own ideas, analyzing yourself. (personally its helped me become more aware of who i am!) imaginationnnnn!! creativity!! make something up, no ones stopping you! the way i view gender is its what makes you, you. it doesnt have to make sense to anyone but you. it doesnt have to make sense! some of the things i tie in with my gender are the rustling of leaves in a forest, fog in the early morning, large fields, chaotic music, soft stuffed animals, the smell of pavement after it rains, soft piano music, acoustic guitar, the moon some of those things are real different!! and those are some of the things that i view my gender as! i think its a lot easier too with the internet, theres a ton of people who have similar ideas and interests so they also make genders, sexualities, and flags to go along with them.

i have a board on pinterest that i frequently add stuff to, i could link it here if you would like! i also save just anynthing that pops up if it remindes me of my friends or it seems cool. it doesnt mean i identify with it, but its cool to read about them! i keep track of them in a notebook as well!! my genders relate to my hyperfixations, mostly. Hyperfixations and anything that i can relate too! ex. horrormasc: a masculine aligned horrorgender. fits both definitions (1: a horrifying/all over the place gender, and 2: a gender related to different horror genres) raingender: a xenogender connected to the rain scenekid/scene neutral, oldwebemoic, onlineboyic, endspacic etc, etc. dont feel rushed at all to tell your boyfriend! when i started feeling more comfortable telling people, i made sure to have articals pulled up to read, notes etc. so it would be easier to sort me thoughts? get it out more smoothly. i also wanted to talk about self-diagnosing!! i hear so much negative about it, but honestly, its good to research and try and find out things about yourself. that my opinion. and not for longterm, just for a bit until you can get evaluated. gahhhhh self diagnosing is valid and it makes me so mad to see people who think its not. granted, some people to just see a couple things and "oh yup got that" but when you really spend time looking at signs, symptoms, traits it can be very beneficial in the long run, and also just to check before you go get evaluated also i apologize if this is insanely long, or if it makes no sense. im sleep deprived, im trying to fall asleep gahh i hope this helped even a little bit!! if you want me to expand on anything or explain anything further feel free to dm me!

[reallyprofoundkryptonite]

Why do you draw this particular character so often? This worries me a bit.

I saw your drawings of a "krogan" with albinism.

It's not very wise to repaint a character who has a "healthy" skin color and turn him into albinism or melanism. People with albinism are not a fetish that you can transform your characters into.

Would you feel good if you suffered from albinism and suddenly someone decided that for the sake of his "au" they would repaint their character/ oc so that they would also suffer from it?

This isn't hate, I just want to know your way of thinking. I felt a bit uncomfortable when next to "au's" like cyborg or mermaid I noticed "albinism au" as if it were some weird. creature or fictional species.

I just don't understand. Is this some kind of fetish or fantasy? A strange desire to become an albino? (even though you wouldn't want to be, believe me)

I repeat - it's just a question. No hate, please don't take it so strongly.

[The question is private, please do not share it publicly. But it's up to you - what you think]

/by the way - there are animals that cannot be albinos, such as horses

First of all. No. I’m not setting this to private. This is the SECOND ask i have gotten with similar perimeters in my inbox in the past day and, personally that is extremely fishy to me, considering the fact that this is coming from a blog that was made that is not following anyone, has no likes, and hasn’t posted anything which leads me to the conclusion that this is the original person who asked the question with that same exact asks’s alt account.

Now I might just be throwing out things into the water, however, I’d rather be safe than sorry. By the way, because I have already answered asks about why I like Krogan in the past. which you can find if you dig around my blog, I won’t be going into graphic detail because there’s already an ask that ANSWERS that question on my blog somewhere if you would go look for it.

But anyways.

1. I’m autistic. I have a hyperfixation on this specific character. I just like him and i cannot put it into words.

2. I am asexual. I do not have a “Fetish.” As you would put it. I am an asexual and I am actively sex repulsed. I do not need to offer you any more of an explanation as to why trying to say I have a fetish is gross.

3. It’s. An AU. An alternate universe. I like exploring other possibilities for canon. That’s… literally it. Nothing else to explain there. I don’t see albinos as “less than.” I do not see them as something that “doesn’t exist” or whatever. I am not stupid. Yes, there are animals that cannot be albinos however humans are inherently a species that carries this trait so I don’t know what you’re trying to point out there.

4. I should also point out that using the wording you did to state that while yes, albinism is an inherently dangerous condition that does have its risks with people, I have done more than enough research to understand that there are ways to keep their skin healthy. The fact that they are so extremely pale complected is due to a genetic mutation that causes a lack of pigment in the skin, eyes and hair. It can lead to skin cancer due to having no melanin however plenty of people with the condition live completely normal lives, so referring to the individual afflicted with albinism as being “unhealthy” is inherently ableist.

Also i myself am so pale i’m fucking translucent in some lights. I don’t have to “fantasize” about being pale.

5. Melanisim is an over abundance of pigment within the flesh. I haven’t done as much research on the topic and i won’t claim to be an expert in any way because I am not but still, referring to someone like this is inherently ableist regardless simply because they have a pigment mutation.

6. AUs are inherently just that. Alternate universes. It’s not saying that a real life condition that people have doesn’t exist. It’s an alternative version of canon. That’s it.

[callibones]

uhhh hh ..... hello! this is the same anon who sent in that ask about object camps. the camps you suggested sound really interesting! im a little too scared to join them for now haha but they sound really cool. they will rotate in my mind for a while i think HGFDSFGHJGFDSDFGH other than that .. 1 . i came across the wiki camp two and it looked so creative and interesting to me! i dont program in css that often anymore but the site makes me wanna go over and put in a bunch of pages. problem is.. i don't know how to Apply? or Do Anything? rn the site is locked for voting but just in general i tried reading the rules but still couldn't understand how it worked. if you knew anything about it that'd be nice. it also seems to have a discord server..? again im scared to check myself but if youre in it i wanna know whether it's a nice space to be in.

2 . uhhghgfdghj i peered through the rest of the blog and found the shelled one blaseball fic you posted ? and i think im really Normal about it. So after reading that i now trust your fanfic opinions. are there any other blaseball fics you'd strongly recommend? and uh general.. uh, evil mind controlly fics would be really nice too (the book of bill is also sort of ruining me along with this so i am truly looking for ANYTHING and like omg hbdxszexrdcfdsxrctvdxszaf) and thats all i wanted to ask you! sorry this is getting REALLY LONG i wish you well and i am So Sorry for bothering you!

HELLO AGAIN! not botherin me at all. :-] i was hopin youd find that answer.... i made sure to answer it at the same time u sent the question so you'd have a MAXIMUM CHANCE of findin it, and u Did! so Yay! welcome back. im going to tag my answers to your Post's with 🩸🟪 so we Never Get Separated Again. but i want you to know.... i don't bite! i literally can't on account of my face is a monitor. so if you wanna chat, feel free to dm me! you seem like a really fun person and we clearly have a lotta interest's in common so Consider That: An Option.

ANYHOO.

1) the wiki camp 2 is ABSOLUTELY a welcoming community. in fact, check this out: here's an index of plainly written explanations of various community in-jokes, to ensure nobody's left confused! while i'm not super active on the discord due to hyperfixating on single spaces at a time like some sort of cryptid, i have a lot of wonderful friends in the community and i'd wholeheartedly call it nice.

you don't have to apply to write, either! while i don't think there's an ETA yet on when the wiki's re-opening, whenever it does you'll be able to make an account for free and start creating to your heart's content! sometimes people who do that even get roped into the camp due to Token Shenanigans....

2) look. i get it. how much do i get it? the post you're talking about was written by my bill cipher fictive. and guess what book made me pick THAT thing up? we're in the same boat. i'm (RELATIVELY) normal 'round these parts, but if you do end up dropping me a line, maybe you'll happen upon some of my stuff? just sayin'. but as for what i can do for ya at the desk here...

thing is, i actually haven't read that much blaseball fanfic. i know! i WANT to. i have a list, which i'll reblog with your special tag right after this. but my brain doesn't let me read a lotta long stuff these days, which is SUCKS! i might poke around some tags and see what i can find, but that spectacular shelled one fic's the only one of its kind i know.

if you wanna read something Long and Serious and Really Really Good that's haunted me for years, put your eyes on Oil and Water, the shoe thieves disaster marriage classic about grief and autism and family and other such things.

then read everything else that catches your fancy, and send me your picks! and hey. if anyone reading this wants to help a cute anon out and knows some fics (or wrote some fics) that fit the Bill i mean the bill, PLEASE lemme know!! i Understand wanting more evil mind control. it's kind of my whole thing. PLUS i'm literally the shelled one's favorite

[all-pacas]

Are you comfortable saying what characters and what about the characterization you disagreed with? Just curious!

I don't want to get too specific because I'm not trying to do any kind of call out post! But it was a sort of situation where a specific character is highly whitewashed and can do no wrong, no matter how understandable or even welcome that would be. It's frustrating writing, not just because it's annoying to read about characters who can and are not allowed to Do Anything Wrong, but also because it's not human.

I'm a huge proponent in messy characters. People making mistakes, making assumptions, saying or doing the wrong thing. Good, well-meaning people who make mistakes, or get upset in the heat of the moment. Especially because they can and absolutely do exist with good or "paragon" characters! It adds so much more depth and interest and relatability! I love positive traits taken to the point of flaws! It's my crack!

And here's the tangent that's made me decide to answer this ask: I. Fucking. Love. That. So here's some very random examples of Good People and Characters with Positive Traits that can be flaws:

PETER PARKER. Amazing Spider-Man's semi-recent Sin's Past arc directly discussed this. Peter has a hero complex; he IS a hero. He compulsively needs and wants to save everyone, explicitly due to his own guilt complexes. It also makes him controlling. He will or won't allow help, will or won't share information. He keeps things to himself, he refuses to share, he intentionally keeps people out of the loop. He wants to save everyone. He thinks he knows how to do it. He dismisses and pushes friends away. He is a great hero and often a shitty friend.

CRITROLE, my guys Caleb and Nott. Best friends, they love one another, they are ultra found family. About halfway through the campaign, Nott begins to struggle with her personal issues, openly and obviously (Xhorhass and Flaskgate). Caleb cares for her a lot. He wants what is best for her. Instead of talking to her about her problems or calling her out on her recent recklessly dangerous behavior, he refuses to talk to her at all. He enables her, an alcoholic, with alcohol. It isn't that he wants her self-harming or in danger, it's because he loves her and can't bring himself to call her out or bring himself into conflict. He Fucks Up.

ALOY Zero Dawn. Another heroic type, she spends about half her time refusing friendship, help, companions, all of it. Her catchphrase is "I'm faster alone." She saves the world and skips the victory party. She's too busy. She has too much on her plate. She hurts her friends. They tell her this. She pushes them away. It isn't because she doesn't want friends -- she's actually a fairly warm person -- or even because she's so anti-social. She has the best of motives and reasons, and she is still a bad friend. She is cold. She is unkind. She is quite cruel to [SEQUEL GAME SPOILER CHARACTER], who we AND she knows does not deserve it, but she sees too much of herself in this person and lashes out. We know why she does it. It's still a dick move. We still love Aloy.

(you might think I'd include current hyperfixation smoothbrain vampire on this list. i cannot. he is an asshole on purpose. his minimal goodness is in spite of this, not because of it.)

I'm not for a second going to pretend that I'm a great writer worth bragging about. But it's something I like to do too. My current OC Tav lady is passive and easy-going. This is a flaw. She isn't passive and easy going because she's okay with shit, but because she feels like she can't and has no right to complain. If you give someone a Trait, follow it to its logical end. How is it good? How is it bad?

It isn't that "these characters are flawed" is some plot twist, it isn't that "characters having flaws" is news. It's that in all three examples, these are characters whose positive traits (heroism, love for another) have the side effect of hurting others. These are characters who are sympathetic (Aloy is isolated, Aloy lashes out for understandable reasons) but still make mistakes (being mean to someone who doesn't deserve it).

In the fanfic I was ranting about, there is neither. The person does not make mistakes, does not take their heroic, story-specific flawlessness into this direction. When arguing, they have the moral high ground, but also the flawless composure to not be rude or hurtful or controlling or a little bit rude in making their points. The other characters fall over themselves to apologize, to understand, to feel sorry for opposing them. It isn't just that they have no flaws (a subjective phrase), it's that the universe twists and conforms to them. There are no consequences, no stakes. They are the sun at the center of the universe. And I vastly prefer messy heroes.

[fadebolt]

This blog is many months old by this point, and it seems like I'm slowly but surely being noticed by more and more people, sooooo I'm thinking a pinned post might be in order.

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~ Hello! Hi! Sup!

Welcome to my lil space!

Name's FadeBolt, but feel free to call me Fade. (Yes, that is the name of a DotA ability. No, I did have more creative name ideas, I just did stuff under this one, so I'm sticking with it)

~ I'm an anxious 21 year old Hungarian wreck that is currently doing college in the northern parts of this small hellhole in the middle of nowhere that we call Serbia.

~ I like to gush and ramble about media. I like to interact with media. I like to make stuff about media. I like to look at, and take part in stuff that other people make about media.

~ Most of this blog is about my hyperfixation that has lasted for almost two entire years by this point, which is, you guessed it - Rain World.

~ Obviously, I still like other stuff (most notably Warcraft 3, as well as League of Legends and its wonderful lore/universe), and I might make posts about them on some occasions, but they're not my main interests, and considering how much I've entrenched myself in the RW community, that likely won't change anytime soon.

~ I don't really have a central thing that I intended for this blog. It's just simply - if I get ideas and I like them enough, then I'll do them. And if I stumble into something that really peaked my interest, or if I feel like I could add something onto it, then I'm reblogging it. (Though I do have a bit of an anxiety over that, cus whenever I reblog something, I always feel bad for the stuff I didn't reblog, but I can't just keep reblogging everything all day every day, so I often end up not reblogging good stuff. Help me. Please xd)

~ But the main things that you can expect here are long writings about my opinions, (mostly) fun drawing, voiceovers, and occasional ramblings about stuff.

~ I want this to be abundantly clear - I really value constructive criticism, no matter how unsolicited it might be. So if I said something you don't agree with, made a mistake somewhere, or just have some general issues with my stuff, don't be afraid to point them out. (Just make sure that it is actually constructive. The goal here is to improve, but there's not really much I could take away from something like "Your art sucks" or "Your opinions are stupid", is there?)

~ Due to recent, uhm... let's just call them 'events', I want to note that online discussions around politics and stuff related to that makes me extremely stressed and uncomfortable, especially after seeing what Tumblr can do to people who said stuff most folks didn't like.

~ This doesn't mean I'm making a strict 'no politics' rule or anything, I'm just looking to minimalize that stuff, and preferably keep it in private 1 on 1 conversations where I won't feel like I'm being judged by hordes of onlookers. This applies to any other contentious topic, too.

~ Unlike a lot of folks, I will not be having a DNI list. I know that this sounds a bit weird, but I want this space to be nice and happy and welcoming, and I do believe that media should be used as a way to unite us in spite of our differences (so this idea of saying "If you have these political opinions I don't like, then GTFO!" just doesn't sit right with me, though I completely understand why some people do that).

I also believe that instead of locking out and trashing on people who said and did stuff we didn't like, we should instead try and help make them understand why that stuff is wrong, so they can learn and grow, because people can indeed change for the better, especially with how many young folks are roaming around on this website. I won't force any of you to hold yourselves to these ideals, but I will stay true to them myself.

~ With that being said: I am not tolerating problematic stuff or asshole behavior here. I'll be somewhat lenient on this, but "I want this space to be nice and happy and welcoming" will always take priority over avoiding being judgemental of others. Just please don't bother me with stuff that's obviously messed up, don't be a cunt, and don't send NSFW my way, that's all I'm asking.

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Aaaaaaaaand I think that's about all the important info for now. I might update this in the future, if need be.

Anyways, I'd like to quickly thank everyone who's ever supported me, taken part in positive interactions with me, or have even just quietly appreciated at least one little thing I have made/done at some point!

I was super scared that nobody's going to care even a little bit about anything I'll do, but I'm very thankful to have gotten proven wrong again and again and again by this wonderful community!

Have a wonderful day and night, everyone! Cheers! :D

[letmeinpplease]

Buckle in kids, the Barnaby Brooks, Jr. Defense Squad is holding a meeting.

So I gave up on the argument with my BIL. Below is, essentially, the essay I wrote trying to explain why his particular opinion of Barnaby sucks. I decided not to send it because I realized that frankly, even if I'm right, it's not going to change his view, so it wasn't worth my time. Instead I figured I'd send it out into the void that is Tumblr to hopefully get some good faith interaction.

-My BIL's best friend watched the show specifically to understand our argument and said Barnaby "had no signs of mental illness, maybe just some trauma."

Bullshit.

Bro has at least an anxiety disorder and, given that I have one and that man is showing every single fucking trait I did before being diagnosed, I will die on that hill (I did also check the DSM for non-anecdotal evidence related to my specific disorder, and I'm pretty sure he meets the GAD criteria). Regardless, PTSD is, in fact, classed as a mental illness (specifically subclassified as a form of anxiety), and you can't watch the show and tell me he doesn't have PTSD.

-BIL's BF also said that Barnaby has a shitty, unlikeable personality with very little to redeem him through the end of Season 1.

Bullshit again.

There's literally a slow progression of him getting steadily better (both mentally and as a person) throughout all of season 1 and into season 2. I don't have time for a full watch through to rip small details, but you can literally watch Barnaby change in real fucking time. He's not the same person at the end of season 1 that he was at the beginning. Maybe its the hyperfixation talking, but I genuinely don't understand how you can watch the show and not catch the little, incremental ways he changes throughout season 1. And on that note--

-You don't have to like Barnaby's bitchy, shitty behavior in early Season 1. You literally aren't meant to. It is bitchy, shitty behavior, and it's stemming from unrecognized and/or unmanaged mental illness of some kind (even if it's only PTSD) in combination with Maverick's upbringing. It's an explanation, not an excuse, and it's realistic as shit. His support network is literally Maverick and Samantha. I'm not even gonna get into how much fuckery the Maverick component added to Barnaby's mental health, social skills, and general world view, cause I really should not have to. As for Samantha, I always got the vibe that they loved each other, but they rarely communicated, so he doesn't have much going for him there.

Why is this relevant?

Because Barnaby doesn't know how the fuck to deal with Kotetsu's shenanigans or his own issues, so he lashes out. Once he actually has and accepts a support network (Kotetsu), he starts to improve as a character. Wanna know why I clocked that? Cause I did The Exact Same Fucking Thing. I had 0 friends in high school because I was a constantly on edge due to unrecognized anxiety and PTSD (obviously at the time I had no idea why I was so angry all the time), which made me a reactive, short tempered bitch. I got better in college, and that was because I was in a different setting and around new people, which provided me the exposure I needed to realize "something might not be right here." The little support network I formed at college helped me learn how to manage, how to interact with people, and how to manage my reactiveness simply through exposure (i.e. I figured it out as we went and apologized when I fucked up, they were not expected to take any sort of responsibility). Recognition of my issues later led to going to therapy and getting a diagnosis. We are literally watching this happen with Barnaby. Season 1 is the first time in Barnaby's life that he has a significant influence outside of Maverick. We are literally watching that exact same growth over the course of the show.

-And that brings us to Barnaby's motivation, which I have another post on, so you can totes skip this paragraph if you want. Once he gets past the revenge arc Barnaby is literally just trying to do what makes him mentally okay. That's literally it. That's what everything he does from then on boils down to. Granted, it's not as obvious early on, but it's heavily implied at the end of season 1, it literally feeds the plot of The Rising, and he outright says that's what he's doing in season 2, and it's backed by his actions throughout. He's still helping people while doing it, so it's not like it's to other people's detriment, but he's prioritizing what he needs and what could make him happy. You gotta put on your oxygen mask before you can help others, and that's a hard but important lesson to learn when you're mentally ill. Prime example is that I had to end a friendship last week because her mental health issues were worsening mine, and she would not accept any form of boundaries. I wanted to be able to continue to support her, but you can't save someone if you're drowning. Additionally, I think it's hard for people to get what it's like for your only goal to be to feel okay without the context of being mentally ill for Literally as long as you've had memories (and I'm not even exaggerating there, pls don't ask about my childhood fear of toothpaste). Seeing that shit reflected on screen is Refreshing As Hell. Barnaby's not in it purely ~to help others~, or to avenge his parents, or for the sake of justice, or anything like that. Barnaby is Literally just a guy trying to find something that makes him happy, and is clinging tooth and nail to keep whatever he finds (namely, his partnership with Kotetsu).

-Basically, my view boils down to this: You don't have to like Barnaby as a character. You don't have to like his coping skills, or lack thereof. But Barnaby is a fantastic representation of what its like for some (key word SOME, I'm not gonna claim my experience to be universal) people dealing with long-term unrecognized mental illness. You can hate him, but when the show outright gives you all this context showing you Exactly why he acts the way he does, and then shows you how he makes an effort to change, you should at least consider it before just saying "he's an asshole and that's that." Also, recognize that if you can't see the representation he provides, He's Probably Not For Your Benefit (why yes, this IS another "importance of representation" post). It's so rare to get realistic portrayals of mental health in the media, and even less so with genuinely Good characters, so frankly, it enrages me when people just disregard the Mountain of context provided in favor of saying "oh, he's just an asshole" (looking at you, CA: Civil War era Tony Stark hate).

[crashingmeteor3]

My Doors AU I made for fun:

So, I made a sort of AU for Doors, which is somewhat close to the canon game with added headcanons from my friends and I.

I made it for fun since I am hyperfixated on this game right now. I might turn it into an actual story in the future but I don't have any confidence in my skills to do that and show it yet. I will be talking about the au and some of my headcanons for it, and it's perfectly okay if you don't share/agree with these headcanons. Please be respectful to me though, as I have put a lot of work into this AU. And feel free to share your headcanons if you want.

The hotel is called 'Hotel Eterna' (a pun on Eternal) and was first opened in 1830 by the Lennon Family, but after a string of murders occur in 1845, the Hotel has to be abandoned and shut down.

The hatred of the family (and probably a bit of magical stuff) give birth to the Hotel's sentience, we'll call it Eterna. Since Eterna was born from hatred and abandonment, it quickly plotted revenge against humanity for abandoning it. But there was a problem, the Hotel couldn't directly interact with those who entered. So it lured in two people, Danya and Aston to 'reopen it.'

Eterna used Danya to find an enchanted book in the library, this was to give it more power. He fell into the trap and opened the book. With the newfound power, Eterna trapped Dayna in a black void and transformed into the first entity, Seek.

Aston went searching for Danya after his disappearance, they heard a roar from the library and headed there, but on the way, they encounter Seek and barely survived the encounter. They were blinded when the windows were destroyed and the glass shards damaged their eyes.

Despite the pain he was in, Aston continued his journey to the hotel, losing strength with every door. When he finally made it, he saw no sign of Danya, but it was too late to turn back because he collapsed shortly after. Eterna planned to have him disposed of, but it got an idea and turned Aston into what people call The Figure.

From 1890 to 1940, Eterna gathered the worthiest people to become the entities who'd kill for its entertainment and rise to power. And it worked, as of 2055, Eterna has eaten hundreds of thousands of souls and got its ideal revenge. But something is wrong... Its control over the entities has been weakening due to an unknown force, how long will it be until Eterna can no longer control them?

So basically in my AU, the entities were humans in the hotel who died, Eterna saw use for them and made them entities, wiping their memories and controlling them so there'd be no reason to try to resist or break out of its control.

Glitch does exist in my AU but won't appear in the story much or at all, they exist from the memories of the entities' human lives along with some normal intruders' lives, because of this Glitch is not a stable being and can only communicate through these memories. Nobody knows Glitch exists, not even Eterna itself.

Timothy is just a regular spider, but they're Eterna's favourite so it gave them sentience. Yay.

Guiding Light, Shadow and Window were 'silenced' by Eterna, meaning their physical forms were taken/weakened and they also can't communicate with intruders or most of the entities.

Window found out 'secret' information and in an act of panic, Eterna trapped Window out of the Hotel and took its voice so it couldn't tell the other entities what it found. But Window is a stubborn thing and stays by the window, waiting to be let back in.

Shadow was silenced after getting into an argument with Eterna over Window, Window and Shadow had a slight parent/child bond.

And Guiding Light was partially silenced after intruders were getting closer and closer to escaping with their help, in reality, Eterna doesn't care who lives or dies. But just to cause GL despair, Eterna took most of their physical form and made their voice impossible for humans to hear/understand unless they're dead or GL communicates with the human while they're sleeping.

Nobody knows of Eterna's existence except for Seek (Seek was Eterna's guinea pig when it came to learning how to control the entities), Guiding Light (Eterna likes to taunt GL about how it can't help anyone escape, even after all these years) and Glitch (because Glitch isn't an actual entity and made from memories.)

None of them can speak about Eterna, this is so the other entities don't find out about it, because then they might realise they were alive once and rebel, which would destroy Eterna's paradise.

Also, I created an entity (Hazard) who basically serves as the janitor of the hotel, after all the intruders die, Hazard is tasked with cleaning up the bodies, and items and fixing the lights, basically bringing everything back to normal for when new intruders arrive. They aren't responsible for the rooms changing each time, however. That's another entity...

-------

That's everything I can think of, lol, if you guys like this I will talk about the headcanons for this AU.

[owlphibiansprite]

my relationship to the dragon prince... (the series, not the zym lol)

(v personal thoughts ahead, honestly i don't recommend reading because it is just meant to be me venting to myself lol)

i think i may or may not have already written this down somewhere but season 5 was not really it for me. like, i'm in a kind of love/hate relationship with the series as of now. i love the universe, the premise, the characters.\ the stories, and as of late, the animation?...not so much. but that's okay. (i really really don't understand when people get all nasty about a series when a tiny minor thing happens that they don't like!! like all attack-y and stuff. like unless it's reproducing very harmful tropes etc, why do people get all mean and say hurtful nonsense...(even then, one should actually call it out instead of randomly spouting nasty shit,no?) anyways, getting off-track here.)

i honestly cannot understand why the team made certain decisions that they did. one thing i can't understand is why the fuck they would release a season when one episode has a port crowded with like the same 2 npcs cloned all over the place. it's quite hilarious but makes me feel weird and shivery and kind of grossly empty inside. and like the storytelling is just... i just... why?? is my question to some things.

but still, idk i feel like the fanfictions i read featuring these characters make me feel warm and fuzzy inside. maybe it's just because the potential of xadia and everything is just so high. there's is just so much that can be done with this universe. plus, i love elves and the fact that there are different magic types and humans and and and like ughhhhhhhhhh i am so happy that these people created this universe!!!! for us to play around in and frolic and enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(some of this excitement might be due to re-entering fanfiction in general with the ceracurist as one of the first fanfics i read by someone who is not me since i got out of my bandfic phase as a younger teen (i didn't even know that fanfiction really was that much of a thing before randomly stumbling across someone looking for the ceracurist on reddit))

anyways i kind of lost the whole point of certain plotpoints here. in the dragon prince i mean. but ALSO i am just so excited for there to be two more seasons and to see what happens with viren and how aaravos will escape and what things are. tbh i'd love to play the ttrpg (if i had people to play with).

PLUS wasn't tdp created so that the video game they'll release will have a cartoon? like idk i kind of love that it's its own universe with books and graphic novels and little stories online ---even though LET ME TELL YOU callum's art book is, like, really bad and kind of useless. not like marcy's journal was to amphibia or anything. it just kind of re-iterates canon stuff in a really boring, non-magical way with random screenshots of the show, i-. my broke ass, like really fucking broke, bought it in my hyperfixation and i was sadsadsad at the lost 16e? idremember how much it was. maybe 12e.

anywayyyyyyyyyys like yeah it's kind of cute and cool how there's little stories and things even though like, there is better fanfiction out there lol. but it's great!!!!!!!!!!!!!! entertainment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

literally i am excited for the new seasons!!!!!!!!!!!

but i m sad that the original raging queerness of the first three seasons got kinda dimmed down. but hello!!!!!!!! cool!!!!!!!!!!!! queer!!!! in the first seasons!

and i am really not a fan of rayllum. like idk. i know everyone loves this ship for some odd reason but i find them boring and stinky (affectionate). hehe. like i read rayllum fanfics because, well just because.\ i've always enjoyed all kinds of shippings and pairings and rarepairs and love seeing people's different takes on characters and romantic dynamics. but like i don't see the appeal...

ANYWAYS those were my braintrash thoughts for now!!!!!! had to get them out into the opennn heh.

baiii

[daevite]

For the autism asks: multiples of 7

sorry for late response aaaa

7. Do you find it hard to make friends?

yeah tbh. even w/ the friends i have made going back to school they are not like...people i spend a significant amount of time with or have frequent conversations with + they usually came to me in some sense rather than me coming to them + they're usually also autistic and/or have adhd so we kinda vibe (though there are some autistic people i've met who i really clash wish) + a lot of them i don't feel especially emotionally connected to i'm still fumbling around in the dark when it comes to genuine connections with others

14. Are you currently in school?

yeah - i'm attending a uni to get a BFA in digital arts! and i'm very happy i made that decision because it has drastically changed my life for the better (the social aspect/experiences more than the education part. maybe that seems to contradict the above on its face but i have much more of something approaching a social life now than i've ever had before even if i still feel like i struggle with socializing.)

21. How open are you usually when it comes to being autistic?

i'll sometimes drop jokes or hints about it if it's at least semi-relevant (e.g. a coworker the other day jokingly called me 'ocd' since i seemed to have a strict system of organization to how i do things at work but i told him i was autistic - he wasn't exactly joking because he apparently though i said i had ocd at one point??) but that probably goes over the head of people who aren't like autistic themselves or sensible about the matter since allistic people have basically turned things amounting to "i'm autistic" into a meme phrase. if i meet someone and they share that they're autistic or that they think they're autistic i'm usually upfront about it at that point.

28. How long do your special interests usually last for?

the way i personally conceptualize "special interests" is something that'll probably stick around for the foreseeable future, whereas something like a "hyperfixation" is a brief obsession that might sometimes re-occur in "episodes" if it's "triggered" again (not the bets terminology but the best i can come up with.) the latter usually happens with media properties and doesn't really revolve around me collecting and sufficiently absorbing information. i would say that like abnormal psychology (specifically, like, mental disorders - especially those related to trauma or specifically complex/chronic trauma) have been one of those persistent interests that i store a lot of information and can recall pretty easily + one i still engage in to this day. the special interest stuff doesn't occur "episodically." i can rattle off facts about a lot of psych stuff all day but i seldom ever want to have an extended conversation about like dragon age or mass effect or fe3h because those are more "hyperfixation"-like where the interest can be "re-activated" but it's not as accessible to me as a special interest.

35. Have you ever used a weighted blanket?

nooo but i would love to have one...pressure stimmy good.

42. Tell us something about your special interest.

this sent me digging to find the paper again but i can't forget this one bit that i thought was pretty interesting: expressions of rage or other strong affect associated with what we understand as borderline personality disorder are primarily externally-directed (e.g. angry episodes due to "splitting" in the bpd sense where one might lash out against an attachment figure/"favorite person") while expressions of rage or other strong affect associated with what we understand as complex dissociative disorders are primarily internally-directed (e.g. internal reenactments of trauma by persecutory parts of the self, and even in the case of external reenactments, said external reenactments are usually self-directed.) i find this whole paper personally important because it helps me understand myself and my relationship to borderline personality disorder as a diagnosis better (as in it explains why bpd is not a helpful framework with which to understand many of my personal mental experiences irt my identity issues and dissociation.)

48. What is your favorite special interest related item you own? Show it to us if you want.

incidentally it might be "coping with trauma related dissociation" or "the coping book." most of the psych-related books i own are in the vein of self-help (like the complex ptsd workbook, dbt workbook, etc.) rather than based around research, though i read like eBook downloads of some more research-oriented ones like "the haunted self" for example.

[wolfwoodthekid]

A very long post on Mafuyu and autism.

DISCLAIMER! This is quite messy, so I apologise for that. I made this a while back and I’ve been dying to share it! I hope you can enjoy its even if it is too much text. 

1. Struggling with emotions and communication.

It is very clear Mafuyu isn’t an expressive person when it comes to his emotions, he is often portrayed with the same face and seems to be distracted most of the time. This might make him seem like he is unattentive, but this is due to him not masking. Masking is when autistic people act so we can look like allistic people, mimicking their smile, tone and facial expressions, since Mafuyu is not doing that, he often has the same expression.

Another thing he says is that he can’t laugh or cry like other people, autistic people have a hard time understanding and expressing their emotions. He states that he can’t find the words to express himself and that is why he is seen to have a hard time writing the lyrics for the song.

Mafuyu doesn’t talk like the others, he is short of words and often replies with a simple yes. This is often seen as he is just not paying attention, or zoning out, but this is just another autistic trait. This can be due to two things, he is a semi verbal person or is more connected to his lack of understanding of his emotions.

First, a semi verbal person is when an autistic person tends to not talk a lot compared to allistic people. Some autistic people are non-verbal, but in the case of Mafuyu, he does talk, just not as much as others.

2. Facial expressions

Mafuyu’s facial expressions don't change as drastic as the other characters. He often has the same face and this also makes it seem like he is distracted or not interested, but that is another common autistic trait. Mafuyu is not trying to mask by imitating the others around him, which causes him to have a same face syndrome. 

3. Fixation on things.

The guitar/music! He is called a prodigy due to his fast learning, but he is just fixated to learn how to play. It is stated in the show that he doesn't sleep to learn to play.

This could be due to playing the guitar is now a hyperfixation for him, autistic people have both hyperfixation and special interests.

4. Echolalia.

Whenever Uenoyama ends his explanations, Mafuyu tends to repeat the last words he says. At first, it looks like he doesn't know what the words mean, but that isn’t the case. Echolalia is the repetition of words/phrases, it's like quoting a movie, but involuntary.

Mafuyu doesn’t understand certain concepts, but most of the time he is repeating what Uenoyama says because he is focusing/trying to understand what he is saying.

5. Sensory processing issues.

This is an anime scene only, but Uenoyama buys Mafuyu a soda, and he says he can't drink it. This may look random, but this can be seen as him not being able to eat certain food due to sensory issues. This can make certain textures feel like hell (personally, I can’t drink soda either, this is why it’s here)

Another scene is after the concert, he states that the lights from the stage burn and that seemed to take a lot of focus. It wasn't a bad thing for him. Sensory issues aren't always a bad thing, we just process things around us differently.

6. Taking things too literally.

Uenoyama tells Mafuyu not to take things too literally when he doesn’t get the eyes in his back phrases. Autistic people tend to not understand certain idioms or common phrases when they have another meaning. Like the phrase “It’s raining dogs and cats.” it isn’t raining literal animals, but phrases like that can be confusing to autistic people.

7. Saying things at the wrong time.

He tends to give direct honest and be brutally honest. Sometimes his answers might seem out of context, like when asked what would he like for the band name. Like I said before, this might look like he is just distracted, but he is just saying what’s in his mind. Autistic people tend to do that due to not reading the tone of the conversation/question.

8. Stimming.

This one is hard to catch, but the song he has stuck in his head might be a stim. Hiiragi says Mafuyu would often hum songs, and Mafuyu seems to not remember the songs. That is because it was a vocal stim! Stim is short for self-stimulation, it is something autistic people do when overwhelmed/underwhelmed. It can be voluntary or sometimes we don’t notice, like Mafuyu. Another scene where we can see him stim is when he first plays the chord to Uenoyama and he keeps playing it repeatedly, which can be interpreted as an audio stim.

9. Explosive episodes.

I do not mean this as in an explosive anger episode, that is a completely different thing. Mafuyu tends to explode after a while, this can be seen with his fight with Yuki and his talk with Hiiragi. This is linked to his struggle with emotions, since he doesn’t express how he feels, he tends to bottle up, which ends in an explosive moment where he loses control of what he says and how he says it.

11. Extras.

In the anime, Mafuyu is seen arranging his toys in a straight line. This sounds like nothing compared to the rest of the notes, but this is often associated with autism.

That is all! II have written a post about autism in anime, if you feel interested in reading more about my thoughts on this topic! 

[literallink]

Not sure if anyone has asked already, but I would love to learn more about your SUPER BIG little linked universe warriors fanfiction. :)

HEEHOOHEEHOO OHOHOHOHO YOUVE DONE IT! YOUVE INDULGED ME! I AM ABSOLUTELY VIBRATING WITH SO MANY IDEAS MWAH I LOVE YOU I AM KISSIM YOU ON THE MOUTH!!/p

n ee ways WAHOOGA this "little" idea started around 1 month ago. Upon finding out that Hyrule Warriors Definitive Edition is NOT canon BOOOOOOOO i have decided that fuck it if hyrule warriors isn't canon ANYTHING is canon. or rather, you can do anything in hyrule warriors and it would be supposedly canon in its own universe.

and that's how my most genius idea began: "Warriors is Hylia's OC Do Not Steal," the series. Wait no come baCK I SWEAR ITS GOOD-

"Warriors is Hylia's OC Do Not Steal" is a series about Warriors being absolutely ANYTHING, mostly due to Hylia's interference. It's like those "Prince Wild" or "Legend is Fable's brother" fics, except those are more noticeable trends while Warriors isn't really worked upon beyond the canon events inside his game. Aside from that really good Storyteller!Warriors fic, amazing Mailman!Warriors series and your local wingfic Warriors is pretty much a dot on the Linked Universe AUs. While yes there are LU aus including the whole chain, it's hard to find a Warriors-centric one that wasn't last year or 2020. So god bless silvercaptain they deserve this mention.

To touch more on the WHODNS series (a working title send help) ill have to explain the series within the series first. Basically, I am going to put Warriors into so many situations and some of them will end up getting me so hyperfixated that I will be forced by my own hand to make a series for it. I actually have a series inside WHODNS in the works right now called "Seventeen," I might make a masterpost about all my ideas sooner or later. You're free to ask for now though!

Seventeen is a Warriors-centric series wherein his connection with the royal family and therefore the Zeldas seem to be more intimate than one would think. And no, not THAT kind of intimate. All ships are the canonwise ones currently and never the main focus of the story.

The Zeldas play a somewhat important role in this story, considering the fact that they're actually joining the chain for their adventure. Why? Connected to the plot I can't say shit (..I need help to come up with a name for a group of Zeldas though).

Here's a sneak peek of the first work in the Seventeen series called "I Used to Kid Myself in this Dress." Yes. It's based off of the MARINA and the Diamonds song.

The portals are acting weird. And by that, they’re forcing all the Zeldas to join the chain on their quest to…no one’s really sure, actually. Every Link agrees that they’re happy to finally have their lover, friend or even sister by their side. Except Warriors.

Because his Zelda isn’t even with them at all.

Or 9 times the Zeldas had a less than pleasant interaction with our resident “ladies’ man,” and one time a Zelda actually took the time to understand him and break that stereotype

Not my favorite work of the series (I have like, 2 more), but it IS the first one. The one after this is called "Rise of a King (Fall of a Queen)," which has my favorite summary so far. Both are currently in the works! "I Used to Kid Myself in this Dress" will have 10 chapters, while "Rise of a King (Fall of a Queen)" are still undecided.

Maybe if people like the idea I'll release the summary for "Rise of a King (Fall of a Queen)."

Alright! Time to rant. Warriors' game is a GOLDMINE for multiple situations. As sad as it is that its not canon it baffles me that no one has thought of the possibilities for it in writing (I have a post for it right here! Although it's more or less just cluttered thoughts).

I hope this post sums it up! Sorry if there are instances where my words don't make sense haha, I'm just really happy that someone bothered to even like my post. My brain was just telling me to write EVERYTHING down but that would spoil the surprise. Have a great day!

[cyanocoraxx]

did anyone ever toold yyyyyyyyyyyyyou that you know . you literally know metal sonic and silver sonic and mecha sonic so good... you know them better than rest of these BITCHESSSSSSS!!!! i think you are a good . i think you KNOW them and are so brain huge... i think um. they should give you like a reward . or 10 rewards!!! did you know?

if i'm brain huge you're brain HUAMONGUS. (heheehehehe. amongus. amogus. get it?)

anyway here's some thouhghts and feelings i have *rattles my cpu and random bits fall out onto the table* o__O

mecha is totally ambivalent to gender. he, she, they, it, xe, whatever. its all fine. the way others perceive them has no bearing on who they are internally. silver is a they/he king but sometimes sprinkles in a she here and there for good measure. metal is he/they/it royalty. its enemies have called it an "it" in the past and it's reclaimed it unconsciously.

silver sees partly in infrared and they think everyone else does too. they dont know its "different" until someone is like what do you mean i'm glowing????

mecha's field of vision is more limited. think of like a horse with blinkers. it was supposed to keep him from distractions in battle so that he could focus on the MURDER DEATH KILL of that certain blue hog. now it just makes them hyperfixate on things even more because the Thing He's Interested In is all he can SEE.

anyway mecha is autistic coded. they struggle with effective empathy (not so much cognitive empathy), they find it difficult to bond with new people due to lack of understanding of social cues - but when they do bond with someone its very strong - and they come off as quite factual and blunt without meaning to be. when they're comfortable with someone they infodump a lot, not to sound smart or anything but just because Hey this person might appreciate this knowledge because I know I Appreciate It. *becomes a functioning wikipedia farticle*

silver is the adhd king. it's a sonic t hedgehog thing. disregard for authority? check. sitting still? don't know her. easily distracted, really enjoys music for the sensory input. etc.

[kirinda-ondo]

You know him, you either love or hate him (or are moderately confused by my sudden dive into this hyperfixation); we're talking about Orko because I have a lot of feelings.

As a disclaimer, I am not gonna claim to be some kind of superfan. I am not aware of every single iteration of the lore and all of its secrets. I don't know anything about the DC comics. I'm only halfway through the 2002 series as of me writing this. I am not someone you want to have discussions on the wider Masters of the Universe.... universe with. However, after watching Revelation, the entire Filmation He-Man (and some of She-Ra, cause he was there too), and going on a deep dive of storybooks, annuals, and minicomics courtesy of He-Man.org and the lovely people who submitted their scans there, I do feel pretty qualified to at least talk about Orko.

So, with all that being said, I'd like to get into a little bit of backstory, if only for my followers who came to this blog for completely different things and are wondering where the hell my love for this funky little wizard dude came from all of a sudden. Truth is, Orko is actually one of my earliest faves! Mind you, I only had limited access to Masters of the Universe as a kid, only seeing a couple of rented VHS tapes and later getting my hands on a small pile of the Golden Books from Goodwill, but apparently it was enough for Orko to  imprint himself into my brain. However, also due to my limited exposure, he kind of got shifted to the back of my head as I got deeper into other things. I still knew for a fact I liked Orko a lot though, even if I couldn't quite remember why anymore.

And then Masters of the Universe: Revelation dropped on Netflix. I'm not gonna get into my opinions of that show lest I open a flood of irrelevant discourse (for those uninitiated, it is a bit... divisive, to say the least). However my feelings on the matter did encourage me to go and watch the original and well, holy shit I love Orko more now than I could have ever comprehended as a kid. He is THE quintessential underappreciated comic relief character I tend to gravitate towards, and then some.

But before I get into that, let me back up a bit and explain. Orko is a Trollan, a race of magical little dudes that are basically floating sweaters with hats and covered up faces. Out of these Trollans, Orko is an incredibly fucking OP archmage. Like, they straight up call him Orko the Great, he's so powerful. But then, he gets caught in a freak storm that whisks him away from his home dimension and into Eternia. Immediately, he runs into a young Prince Adam, who is trapped in a swamp/tar pit and needs rescuing. Orko, being the upstanding lad that he is, uses his magic to save him but in the process loses the item that allows him to focus his magic to the swamp (in the 80s version, it's a medallion, but in the 2002 series, it's a wand). Worse yet, the magic (and dare I say the very laws of physics) in Eternia works pretty much the opposite as it does in Trolla, so he's been incredibly nerfed.

So basically, Orko is trapped in a topsy-turvy world away from friends and family, a world with magic he is fundamentally incompatible with. Ouch. He's not completely screwed, however, as he is rewarded by the king and queen for his heroism and appointed... the court jester. Double ouch. He surprisingly doesn't seem to mind though. He genuinely does enjoy entertaining people, even when his tricks only ever work like half the time because he's basically a Mac program trying to run on a Windows computer.

It's not all horrible though, as he does quite literally get adopted by the royal family  and thus sort of become the entire palace's weird son/little brother (despite being older than many of them. He's very, very child-coded largely for the purposes of being a stand-in and example lesson to the actual children watching). But also, more importantly, he becomes one of the very select few to know that Adam and He-Man are one and the same.

But outside of secret-keeping, he is actually a pretty valuable ally to have against Skeletor and his dudes because even though his magic is kind of screwed up, when it does work, he's still one of the most powerful mages on Eternia. In various materials, he's created floods, a second winter, and hell, he can literally explode himself and still be perfectly fine. He's also really clever and can weasel his way out of a number of situations. In one episode, for instance, he manages to convince someone that he's He-Man and Adam is his "assistant" in order to free him from captivity so the day has a better chance of actually being saved.  He's also got the ability to just be really frustrating and incomprehensible to the point that villains who capture him sometimes either don't want him or don't know what to do with him anymore, which is honestly really funny. In an episode of She-Ra, the villains tried to scan his brain but because the inner machinations of his mind are that much of an enigma, he got diagnosed a weirdo and broke the entire machine. Absolutely delightful.

However, there's a lot more to Orko than just comedy and bungled magic. He's actually surprisingly complex!

See, going into this, I expected Orko's whole situation be played entirely for laughs while the sadder implications of his existence go entirely unaddressed. Coming off the heels of characters like Cobalt and others I enjoy, I'm used to this sort of treatment by writers. But they actually don't do that. The depressing subtext is for once, actually TEXT, which was INCREDIBLY surprising to me. We actually get to see another side of him, a side that hates that he can't be taken seriously no matter what he does, a side that is well aware of all the trouble he causes and feels like a burden to those around him. He actually runs away on multiple occasions, fully believing that he's unloved and everyone would be better off without him, even if that couldn't be further from the truth (a point which the Sorceress hammers home with multiple straight up magical video presentations, and in the 2002 series, a literary adaptation, of why he is loved and important).

Underneath all the hyping himself up that he does, there's a lot of insecurity. He's someone who desperately wants to be loved and respected and feels that without funny magic tricks to entertain people, he has no inherent value (which is incredibly relatable if you are also known by people as The Funny One). At one point he agrees with the notion that he doesn't feel like much more than a pet, which is absolutely heartbreaking. Even when he gets the ability to go back and forth between Eternia and Trolla, his feelings of inadequacy now extend toward his family, worrying that his own uncle, the one who taught him everything he knows and greatly contributed to him being Orko the Great back home in the first place, wouldn't be proud of him. Being on Eternia highkey wrecked his shit, man.

However, even when given the opportunity to go back home for good, he always chooses to stay because he's loyal as hell. Even if he needs some reminders, he does know he's needed not just in the fight against evil, but just because his friends and newfound family genuinely love him. It's heartbreaking, but also incredibly wholesome. I did not even remotely expect a comic relief character like this to get this much depth and respect from the writers, especially not from the incredibly campy and cheaply animated 80s series. I am genuinely so unused to this.

But I think that's also what separates him a bit from his fellow Silly Kid Appeal Characters That Kids Fucking Hate ala Snarf Thundercats or Scrappy Doo. He not only makes a concerted effort to be an actually useful ally, but he's also in fact very self-aware of his status as one of these characters. He knows he screws up a lot but he actually tries to accept responsibility and fix it. It makes me wanna root for the lil dude. Now I understand if someone isn't a fan of the brand of humor he brings to the table, or feel like he's simply a distraction from the Cool Buff Dudes Fighting Each Other, but I hope you can see why he might also be a really appealing character to other people, both kids and adults alike. I mean, he was popular enough to be embedded into the canon despite originating from the cartoon and not the toyline for a reason, after all.

Orko is a fun, entertaining, but also complex, heartwarming, and relatable character. I know there is a faction of people that would disagree with me, but I don't think you need to change him all that much or make him a super serious character to be more appealing. He's already got a lot going on that a writer could easily work with. It all just depends on where you decide to focus. Take a lesson from the show and accept that he's fine just the way he is.

[heloflor]

Me : “I don’t think I should write characters that are explicitly neurodivergent because I don’t know that much about neurodiversity and I never take the time to know more. If I were to make a character who happens to have neurodivergent traits and call them neurodivergent, I might get it wrong and I don’t want to give a fic with bad or stereotypical representation in it, it’s unfair for those who can and wish to identify with the character. So if I write about a character that the fandom sees as neurodivergent, I will simply try to write them close to their canon personality; and if they happen to have traits that people can identify, I’ll just let other people do their own headacanons around it without touching on the topic myself.”

Also me :  “So :

- Vinnie Dakota absolutely adores animals. In the future, all animals are extinct, so in order to see animals, you either get a robot pet or you pay to have some time in a “place simulation” room and order it to simulate a field with holographic animals. Dakota learned about animals through books and often went to the simulation place or bough some stickers and other stuff from the rare places that still sold animal merch. He never got a robotic pet or never kept it for long because it’s too dull compared to a real animal, or should I say his thoughts of real animals.

- During his first mission, Dakota was ecstatic to see animals for the first time and, after the mission, spent a few hours looking at and petting the ones he could. In his house in the future, he has a room in which he displays animal-related stuff he got from his missions through time, like art or figurines or ornaments or even plushies etc. He might also sometimes take pictures of animals and put them with the souvenir he got from the same mission. He takes extra care of the stuff he has in this room and organizes it a certain way. He has the money to have a place with several rooms : as we see in “Picture Day”, once they got fired, Cavendish and Dakota had the money to go to Hawaii for an entire week and without knowing when and how they will get a new job, since Bob Block met them as they were about to leave for their vacation. Also Cavendish mentioned studying for 20 cycles, so this job doesn’t seem like a given. So being a time traveler seems to pay well.

- When he and Cavendish started dating (I headcanon them as starting to date 2 years after meeting a marrying 3 years later, so 5 years after meeting), everytime they went through a century they never or barely visited, Dakota would get a random souvenir, not always animal-related, along with a picture of either him, Cavendish or both of them. He puts these souvenirs and pictures in a different part of the room. The picture we see in their car in “Fungus Among Us” is from a mission in a place they visited before, but Dakota found the situation too funny to not take a picture.

- Every celebration (holidays, birthdays, dates important to them), Cavendish and Dakota would give each other gifts. Dakota always tries to find something related to Professor Time while Cavendish forces himself to break a few rules and go back in time without being ordered to so he can find something animal-related to Dakota. Dakota is always genuinely happy about these gifts, though he learned not to tease Cavendish about the whole “breaking the rules” situation. Those gifts are either stuff like fossils or skulls/bones or they’re stuff related to the culture of the time-period like watching tournaments in ancient Rome.

- When the two get married and buy a place together, Dakota makes sure it has a room large enough to put his growing collection. As time went by, it started to be less about animals and more about what they find during their missions, though the animal part is still very much there. Dakota refers to the room as “The memory room” while Cavendish calls it “Vinnie’s room”. Cavendish doesn’t spend that much time in it, though he absolutely loves the feeling of reminiscence the collection gives him. If he has guests at home, he tries to keep them away from the room. He knows how important it is for Dakota and doesn’t want it to be disrupted. Cavendish tried to get into Dakota’s passion but, while he found some stuff to be interesting, he’s not really into it compared to Dakota.

- After the events of the episode “We’re Going to the Zoo”, Dakota brought back tickets for his collection, along with a picture of him holding squirrels in his arms while another one has its head coming out of Dakota’s pants, near his feet. Dakota went back to the zoo several times and ended up learning what every animal was and in which section of the zoo they were.

- When the two are fired and banned, they only get like an hour to pack all their stuff. So Dakota uses some future deus ex machina technology, making their house surrounded by a barrier that only the two of them can open. That way, nobody can touch the house and, if they were to be able to go back to the future, which seems to be the case if season 2 was already thought of when “A Christmas Peril” was made, Dakota could find his collection intact, along with the rest of the house.

- Once stuck in the past, Dakota kind of gave up on doing a collection. They don’t have enough space and the realization that Cavendish could now die anytime put a lot on stress on him and most of his thoughts were on Cavendish. This stress started to dim out after the events of the second half of the season, when Dakota realized that maybe the world was done trying to get rid of Cavendish, given how the man was able to survive alone for about a month. During the first celebration they had since getting banned, Cavendish bought something animal-related as usual and it led Dakota to wish to start a collection again. Given the space and their current situation, this collection would mostly be pictures that he can keep in an album in a drawer. Cavendish would probably be the one to buy the album after realizing that Dakota started taking random pictures again.

- At some point, Cavendish learns that there’s a petting zoo in Danville and decides to use it as a birthday gift/surprise. Dakota has never been more in love with him than during the moment when he stepped out of the car and saw the place’s sign (with the exception of their wedding and honeymoon).

 …aaaannnd I just made Dakota have an hyperfixation, didn’t I ?

Though, to be honest, I really do want to write characters that are diverse, not only in terms of sexuality like I already do but also in upbringing and neurodiversity. Thing is, to write a neurodivergent character, I need to have the answer to these questions : How often do they stim ? What are the most common stims and what is and isn’t considered as such, aka what does the character does in the show that seems to be a stim ? How does the character acts/should act with others ? Which social cues do they understand ? Which ones do they not understand ? How to write a character that you can tell is neurodivergent without having to make them scream ‘I’m not neurotypical’; with instead having the only ‘confirmation’ of it being in the tags ? How to make them very excited about something without falling into the ‘autistic people are children’ stereotype ?

As long as I can’t answer these questions, I refuse to be an idiot and try to write about something I know I will mess up. And while I do have the curiosity and will to learn more, if not simply because I’m curious about neurodiversity, don’t expect me to write about it anytime soon. Right now my priority is to ‘digitalize’ all the dozen fics I wrote on paper (two of them had been in my writing pile for two years, and several for a year) while making the eventual post that comes to mind like this one.”

Edit : So a few weeks after making that post, I started to learn more about neurodiversity because being autistic makes you curious to know what kinds of behaviors are due to you not being neurotypical. And, as it had been pointed out, I’m not using the correct term here. I didn’t give Dakota a hyperfixation but a special interest. From what I understand, the difference is that hyperfixations stick to you constantly for a while (a few weeks or months), leading you to easily hyperfocus on the topic, before you suddenly start to get less invested in that interest. On the other hand, special interests can stick for months or sometimes years. And even if you’re not constantly thinking about your interest, it’s still there in a corner of your mind and you never get tired of it and keep the knowledge you accumulated to talk about it anytime.

So yeah, I gave Dakota a special interest. The reason why I thought it was a hyperfixation is because I see this term be very often associated with ADHD and a lot of people see Dakota as having ADHD. But still, my bad for mixing up the two. And the reason I didn’t edit the post sooner is because it kind of slipped out of my mind until I made a new post today that mentions this one. Sorry for that too.