#but i've just been super like done. lmaoo

[xannerz]

roblox death noise

[edenfenixblogs]

hey, gentile here. just came across this post of yours and, first of all- it's SUPERB. it showed me a perspective on being a jewish ally that i really wouldn't ever have considered by myself, made me more confident in my choice to put combating jew-hatred above the friendships I've recently lost, and gave me a really useful direction on where to go as an ally to jewish people onwards. that being said, there's a few details about it I'd like to press you about, if it's not too much trouble.

this point is probably worthy of an eyeroll as i'm a culturally christian atheist (making a concious effort to not be *that* kind of atheist), but: when you refer to G-d as the creator of all things, you stress that that includes evil- but that, in so doing, G-d is not evil themself. now, I'm asking this with the express purpose of you correcting me, so: why does this G-d- as a G-d fundamentally distinct from the Christian conception of God as a Super-Mega-Ultra-Perfect God Who Can Do No Wrong Ever- create evil? i, personally, have been led to believe by @/spacelazarwolf that it is simply because G-d, too, makes mistakes just like any human being, but the way you worded it in this paragraph (which I've included as a screenshot below) had me interpret G-d creating evil as a concious, intentional action. did i just not read it correctly? and, if i didn't, then is the reason G-d creates evil part of this central struggle you went in detail into in the same paragraph, and as such, a very individual part of Jewish belief that no two jews agree on? and if that is so, would you be comfortable with sharing your version of it?

a few paragraphs after that one, you dedicated many words to make it absolutely crystal clear that, in the process of unlearning and combating jew-hatred in the society around me, i should, in spite of the vitriol that they propagate, love the former friends i lost to antisemitism. how- and *why* should i love the people who, on an early october 8th morning, actively celebrated the news of a massacre of Israeli civilians? who mocked- and still mock- the survivors and the families of hostages? who wield the memory of the holocaust as a baton against Jewish people's right to self defense? who deify terror groups who are up to their necks in atrocities? who make an active effort to spit on the face of *reality?* How could i possibly look at the face of a friend who chose allegiance to a terrorist group she did not even know existed four months ago over me- who she had actively interacted with for much longer?

would you rather we called ourselves "gentiles" or "goyim?" I've been calling myself a gentile for the longest time because i see jamming a word from a language i don't speak at all in an otherwise english sentence to be disrespectful and constitute appropriation, but you and other jumblr blogs have given me the impression that that is not the case. furthermore- i believe it was @/bambahalva who pointed out the usage of the word "gentile" in antisemitic segregation policies.

that is all- i hope this message finds you well. oh, yeah one more thing- what do you think of The Forward news network? i came across them by chance and next thing i knew I'd gotten into their newsletter.

WARNING: I HAVE FINISHED WRITING THIS AND IT'S LONGER THAN I EXPECTED AND ALSO MORE JEWISH THAN I EXPECTED LOL! I have done the most Jewish possible thing I could do and answered all of your questions with questions. I'm sorrryyyyyy! This is what happens when you grow up surrounded by rabbis and future rabbis! LMAOO

Oooh! What a good ask! I love this ask. OK, so! Let's go in order.

First of all, thank you so much for your kind words. And thanking you for backing your words with the action of prioritizing kindness over hatred. It matters. More than I can ever explain. Thank you.

You know, it's funny. People ask me a lot of questions about i/p that they think will have simple and straightforward answers that just don't. And I end up writing a lot of essays because of this. The questions you wrote me seem like they should be complex, but feel relatively straightforward to me.

Now, to your first bullet point: I don't know. I truly do not know. I think that G-d is fundamentally just...G-d, and in so being, G-d is truly unknowable to me. I think many Jews have many different interpretations on why G-d creates evil. I'm no rabbi, but one of my BFFs is and so is her mother and great grandfather. That doesn't give me any kind of authority. It just means I've spent a lot of time thinking about theological questions like this. As for my perspective, I'm a progressive/reform Jew, not a humanistic Jew. I do actually believe in G-d, but I vibe with the community philosophies of Humanistic Judaism a lot. So that's the perspective I'm coming from here:

I'm not a particular fan of the Book of Job, because I think it gets twisted and interpreted in Christian ways more than most Hebrew books and it can too easily be twisted into a "Don't question G-d, because G-d is perfect" narrative that I find to be fundamentally at odds with how I practice Judaism. Also, it's just a very sad story about how a good and kind man lost everything, and it makes me sad to think about. HOWEVER, that traditional "Don't question G-d" narrative is not how I learned to think about that book. The way I learned it, I believe the Book of Job describes this issue most explicitly. After Job loses everything he holds dear and talks to all his friends and begs again and again "Why? Why did G-d do this to me? Why would G-d do this to me when I'm a good person?" And basically G-d hears everyone answering for G-d with various reasons, "Maybe you were bad." "Maybe you should make an offering" Maybe this. Maybe that. And eventually G-d responds from within a storm (paraphrased of course) 'Why the fuck do you think it's your business to know? I made the whole universe! I made everything you see. I made the world that gave you your family in your first place. Why do you think you get to question my motives?'

The way I always interpreted that is: I don't fricking know! It's not really my business. What am I gonna do? Stop G-d? How does my knowing why G-d creates evil help anything? It doesn't mean we don't question G-d. It means we should instead focus on what we CAN control. I can't make 10/7/2023 not happen any more than I could stop The Holocaust or form an ocean. That's divine business, not human business. What I CAN do is make the world better now. What use is it challenging things that we cannot change? Things that are in the past? What's the point of asking why bad things happen when we can instead focus on stopping more bad things from happening. G-d named us his people when Abraham fought with G-d to stop the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah. Abraham repeatedly asked, "But are you sure? But what if there are 100 good people? 50 good people? 10 good people?" And G-d kept responding, basically, 'I mean, there aren't. I know this cuz of how I'm G-d and know all the things. But knock yourself out looking.' My interpretation of this was that G-d doesn't get mad when we do our utmost to help our fellow human beings. G-d gets mad when we waste our energy that we could be using to help our fellow man to instead be angry and rage futilely against the past. I say this as someone with PTSD as someone who attempted to stop a tragedy from occuring and failed and can never understand why. What informs my trauma and what makes it so hard to get past isn't that G-d allowed it to happen. It's that people did. It's that I begged for help before it happened--over and over and over to dozens of adults in various positions of authority in order to prevent this terrible thing from happening (no, I will not now or ever disclose what that thing is). And all the people who could have helped failed me, and now two people are dead. Because someone did an evil, evil thing. And a bunch of other people let it happen. I'm not mad at G-d. I'm mad at people. And yet, I also know that hating people and finding reasons to dismiss them and despise them is what leads to more tragedies like that happening. So, despite my rage, truly the only thing to do is to love people. It's the only that helps. It's the only thing that repairs the world. It's the only thing that we can control. So, in short, my answer to "Why does G-d create evil?" is "Why should I spend my valuable time on earth trying to answer that question when, instead, I can spend that same exact amount of time asking millions of people, 'How can I help? What's wrong, and how can I help make any part of it better?'?" We don't need to understand G-d to make the world a better place. I'm fine leaving G-d stuff to G-d and spending my time on the human stuff.

Now, your second bullet point. Love their souls. You don't have to love what they've done. But they are human beings, as are we all. I think this can also easily be twisted into the Christian framework of "Hate the sin, love the sinner," but that's not what I mean at all. People's evil deeds are a part of them. They need to take responsibility. There is no divine absolution for crimes that people do unto each other in Judaism. If you harm a person, G-d cannot forgive you for that. Only the person or people you harmed can forgive you. And to a certain degree, we are all defined by our actions toward others. And so, no. I do not forgive the terrorists who woke up and decided to kill a bunch of Israelis and Israeli-adjacent humans. I do not forgive those who celebrate the deaths of Israelis because of some misguided sense of justice. I do not forgive the people who continue to send me hatred and death threats day after day after day after day. And I do not love the parts of them that did and do those horrible, unforgivable things. But my goodness. They were babies once. They either had parents who love(d) them, which is so sad, because they have this life of love and they chose instead to fill it with so much hate. Or they didn't have any parents or loved ones or anyone to guide them and, my goodness. That is so sad. How terrifying and alone that must feel. Maybe they have friends and family who love them and are instead wasting their precious time on this planet directing their energy at raging against me and 15 million other Jews they've never met. Or maybe they don't have anyone who loves them and they think that hating me and harming me will bring them some sense of purpose and joy. What a horrid way to live.

My Grandpa died last year. I have a wonderful family for whom I'm very grateful, and I even have good memories with my Grandpa. But he was not a good person. He came from an abusive home, and weaponized that abuse on his loved ones until he drove them all away. He was a narcissist. Not in the pop psychology sense. But in the actual clinical sense. He ruined every relationship that ever mattered to him--personal and professional. And in the end, because of his own actions, he died alone. He had pushed everyone so far (often with legal threats and action) that when he died, he laid on a slab for weeks because nobody could figure out who to call, because he had no one left. (For reference, Jewish burials are supposed to happen rather quickly and two weeks is...not good.) He was the only person in his generation who was not born in Israel--my family on his side has lived in Israel since looooong before even the British Mandate and he was the only person in his family born and raised in the US. As far as we can tell, the family on that side has been in Israel for as long as Jews have existed. He was religious. And while I've never been to Israel or met any of my family there, he did go. And he kept in touch with his relatives there before driving them away too. He was a wealthy man, but convinced himself that everyone only wanted him for his money and then decided to horde it instead. He left nothing to his children or to me. He left all his money in an endowment to his university--a place that uses that money to fund anti-Israel organizations now. He died alone, without his family that lived nearby, and with a legacy that will now cause active harm to the family that lived far away. He could have died surrounded by the loved ones from around the world who wanted nothing more than to be near him and loved by him. His story is a tragedy. The story of every person who chooses hatred over love is a tragedy. The story of someone who woke up and chose to murder others or to delight in the death of others is a tragedy. I love the soul in the center of these people. I loved my grandfather. I could not be around him. I cannot forgive some of the things he said and did. But I love the person he could have been. I love the part of him that gave me some good memories. I love the family he gave to me.

No, we do not all need to love or forgive those who have wronged us or terrorized us or murdered our loved ones. But that is different from mourning a human soul. From loving the potential of a human soul to do good in the world, and mourning the loss of that soul and its potential. Every human being--every single one no matter what they have done in their lives--has the potential to create goodness and make the world a better place. Every moment of every single day is a new chance to meet that challenge and do our best. Sure, not all of us have it in us to try our best every single moment. Sometimes life is hard and we're sad and tired and hungry and angry. And that's ok, because we have tomorrow, and an hour from now, and a minute from now. But the moment someone chooses to take action and decides that action should be to cause another harm or celebrate the harm that was caused? That's a tragedy. And when a life is extinguished, that is a life that loses its potential to try again and do better. We shouldn't love people because we deem them worthy of love. We should love people because they are people. And so are we. And how wonderful is that? I could choose to hate them. It would be so easy! But why should I do that? What do I gain? What do they gain? And isn't it so wonderful that I chose to love instead? And isn't it so wonderful that you can, too?

As for your final bullet point: I have no preference. I say goyim cuz it's easier for me. Goy/gentile/non-Jew are all fine to me. I have some icky feelings about the word gentile for a variety of linguistic reasons I won't bore you with. But some other people don't like when non-Jews appropriate Yiddish words. Others (including me) find it wonderful when non-Jews call themselves goyim. All my closest non-Jewish people call themselves goyim, including my sister! Non-jew is the most neutral in English and least likely to offend anyone. But it still separates Jews as an other whereas "goy" is a way to distinguishing yourself from Jews while also being an acknowledgment of our culture. As far as I'm concerned as long as a goy is being a goy (ally, positive) rather than a goy (derogatory) I don't mind that they call themselves goyim. LOL! Idk, friend. Do what makes you happy! What do you prefer?!

Regarding The Forward news network: They are a reliable Left-Center source with a high credibility and reporting rating and only one failed fact check in the past five years for which they issued a correction. I would consider them a reliable source. They cover legitimate issues of people who support Palestinan self-determination ostensibly being punished for their stances. They publish Op-eds critical of Netanyahu, who is terrible. And they address how antisemitism is harming diaspora Jews. They seem to consistently emphasize the humanity of everyone, which you can tell based on the rest of my post is very important to me, but they also avoid over-editorializing on news that is not in the Op-Ed section. I'll never endorse any source as perfect or guaranteed to be free of problems or harm or bad takes, but they do seem to make a genuine effort to be factual, clear, and wholly truthful. Note: I highly recommend that everyone installs the Media Bias/Fact Check extension on their web browsers. Get in the habit of checking and evaluating sources critically. It's a skill that will serve you your whole life.

@clawdia-houyhnhnm I hope this helps. And thank you for your thoughtful ask and commitment to intercultural understanding. <3

[aerequets]

Hello again!

I was wondering if you had any spy x family fic recs that are twiyor centric? AUs? I’m having trouble finding ones that are what I’m looking for. Ratings don’t matter. Anything from G to E would be appreciated! Thank you!!

boy oh BOY do i have twiyor fic recs !!!! it's like basically all i read LMAO and i am always on a hunt for more. i feel like i have read through a good chunk of what's on ao3 and i still feel starved. there's always my bookmarks you can sift through for twiyor fics, but for some more curated recommendations (and this is not gonna include all the ones i've lost my mind over, that's far too many, this is just what i can remember off the top of my head):

the living blues by @nire-the-mithridatist

GOD it would be such an understatement to say i am a huge fan of not only this work but EVERY WORK by this author because SHE HAS A WAY WITH WORDS OKAY. i avoid angst like the plague but i saw the happy ending tag to this fic and IT DIDN'T DISAPPOINT (chapter 6 is gonna be an epilogue)!!!!!!! AUGHHH this isnt even a good review im just yelling but yeah this is really good and also pretty much everything else by this author, i'll say it now so this list doesn't have numerous fics by the same person just do yourself a favor and read through what she's got if you haven't already

rated T, 5/6 chapters, currently 14k words

(edit: completed!)

With Kid Gloves by crownofrosegold on ao3

4 words: Mr Darcy Hand Flex

rated G, 1/2 chapters, currently 2.5k words

(edit: completed!)

the most yearning, pining, longing fic ever with the least physical touch ever. loid traces yor's gloves in his pocket with his thumb and its somehow intimate. yeah

it's been a hot minute since it's updated but the first chap can kinda be read as a standalone (to me) which is why i rec, even though i personally only go after finished fics for my own sanity :^) also its just too darn cute how can i not

How to Be a Supportive Husband by @nemaliwrites

rated T, 1/1 chapters, 910 words

short and sweet drabble of the most simpiest loid post reveal. what more could you want

MISSION: Bottom Feeder by SilverSupa on ao3

rated T, 2/4 chapters, currently 9.5k words

this one is just too good and funny LMAOO yor and loid are Peak Stupid and also Peak Attracted To Each Other so it's just. mm good mix. this one's also been a hot second since it's last update but i love it too much so its on this list

even when we're not together (will you stay with me?) by JaMills on ao3

rated T, 1/1 chapters, 4.5k words

gosh this is another one of those super good reads that make you sit and think after you're done. soulmate AU where they swap bodies as children until they meet. personally i'm not the most dedicated reader of aus where yor and loid meet as kids, but the way its handled here is just so good and adds to the story. it's also part of a series and the next installment is equally as good. this is another one of those authors that has a lot of quality stuff (although there's a good dash of angst which i keep my distance from JKFHISDH) so look through their page!

Enough by Frotu on ao3

rated T, 1/1 chapters, 4k words

EHEHE THIS ONE HAS ME GIGGLING AND KICKING MY FEET FR it is soooo cute. typical thing of yors coworkers getting into her head, she asks loid if what they have is enough, and... well.... you can read what happens from there ;] (spoiler: it's very cute)

a dream in charmeuse by selfetish (@selfetishizing ) on ao3

rated T, 2/2 chapters, 12k words

oh gosh, the prose in this is just?? so insanely good??? its such a pretty read. this is twiyor, yes, but it's also a deep dive into femininity and yor's understanding/rediscovery of it. i remember the first time i read it the opening scene of the first chapter was just so GOOD to me, i was like OMG i am not gonna forget this this is so iconic AND IT IS!!!!! i love me a good yor centric fic. we usually get more of twilight contemplation (i mean he has got the whole mission thing going on and hes our resident overthinker so, understandable) but this was such a nice look into yor's..,, like, fundamental building blocks?? if that makes sense?? its just good ok read it

"The Five Times Loid Forger Went Topless In Front of His Wife and the One Time She Reciprocated" Or “Bare-Chested in Berlint” by Talik_Sanis on ao3

rated M, 6/6 chapters, 17.5k words

that title should tell you all you need to know right LMAOOO it's just yor being incredibly horny, like embarrassingly so. she lacks a grip

again this is just 8 fics, where my bookmarks list are over 200 (yeesh) so feel free to look through those. i've also got some fics, most of which are twiyor lmao (brainrot i told you). and don't forget to show these awesome authors some love!

[alexs-asks]

Sorry if this sounds weird your blogs are cool and I've been scrolling past them for a few minutes now. And I saw around 6 asks kissing him and like 4 asks hugging him (that's only by far), I can NOT imagine the sceneries he would be put in and the sentences he would have to read if the litte "no NSFW" rule was not in your pinned post, people are DOWN BAD for this man 😭😭

LMAOO this one made me laugh tysm you're not coming off as weird at all, don't worry! i'm super thankful and flattered you think my blogs are cool, so thanks for checking them out -- i love hearing things like this 😪🙏

i've thought about your point and i agree 😭 people love the stardew bachelors/bachelorettes it seems, and it's sweet to see a lot of affectionate people when it's just hugging and whatever, but omg if i didn't have a no nsfw rule i think i'd be done for 😨

here's a short compilation of some down bad asks i've gotten on this website though, since we're on this topic (cw: mildly suggestive)

[dogwittaablog]

I remember when the leipsic group chat leaked he liked a post with a quote saying the fun is gone in hockey because these guys can get caught nowadays. looking back I feel dumb that I thought he was different because there were abundant signs lol

Honestly sometimes you just assume someone is stupid and don't think much about it because there's people that can just view that as a ''like'' on a post so it doesn't feel like it holds as much power or significance compared to actually first hand witnessing them be vocally problematic. Some people just don't look into things super deep and over analyse other people's social media activity, things can just fly over your head sometimes, it's fine.

(I am aware the most ''vocal'' problematic thing he's done in recent years had been that comment on Logan Mallioux situation when Trudeau made a comment about it. I still stand by the fact that I think it was a dig towards JT for being a hypocrite since he himself has done shitty things in the past... though doesn't render the fact he's completly stupid for saying it on his main ig account LOL)

I kind of feel like his sisters wouldn't be surprised, I am sure they're self aware and know how guys are too... I don't believe they're that oblivious to their brother being an ass-hole I just don't think they knew he was acting like THAT big of a bum online lmaoo. I've seen people say things like '''Oh if he was my brother I'd give him an ear full'' and ''If he was my sibling I'd never talk to him'' IN reality most of the time they actually don't care and it'd take more then a sister bitch out to actually change someone's mentality and character as an individual.

[mysilentnightshipping]

Ooh how about 1-6 for the general section?? 😈 - @isabelinlove

wooooo thank you bestieeee !! i was hoping you’d ask me a bunch of questions 😈 i’m very happy to deliver <3333 @isabelinlove

1. Who initiated the relationship, and how did it go?

> tom did! after finally breaking up, he just showed up at my office at the end of the day, said he’s all done with shiv and that he wants us to be together. like grown ups should be, no sneaking around to find empty conference rooms or ”late nights at work” as an excuse to spend time together at my place. he wanted a real relationship with me.

i was taken aback and very surprised. i knew how much he valued his position and the power that came from being the partner of a roy so him breaking up felt almost like a love confession, so i felt very honored and a little bit terrified. but i was very happy, too; i’d been very casual about us so far and didn’t want to make it seem like that big of a deal if he’d decided to never separate, but at that point i couldn’t hide my excitement. and i didn’t need to, he needed my overjoyed reaction to affirm that the choice he made was the right one.

as for who initiated the affair that started it all… i think it was him, he thinks it was me 😝

2. Did they have an official first date? If so, what was it like?

> we did go on dates in our affair era, took some sneaky overnight trips together and went to expensive dinner dates but once we started to date for real i took him to my favourite bookstore and we picked out books for each other :3 super cliche but we were both feeling kind of sappy and we knew enough about one another that a basic dinner date felt kind of redundant. and it was nice to be out in public without having to worry getting caught.

3. What was their first kiss like?

> the very first one happened after a meeting of some sort, the tension between us had been building for a while and there'd been a few almost kisses but we'd always been interrupted. in a bold move i asked him to come to my office and we walked there in total silence, both of us knowing exactly what would happen next. once the door closed... we POUNCED. very intense and thrilling.

second first kiss was right after the Break Up Confession, initiated by me. i just got up from my desk, walked over to him and went for it. just as intense as the first one but full of relief and excitement instead!!

4. Were they each other’s first anything (kiss, relationship, etc.)?

> does tom’s healthiest relationship count?? we really weren’t each other’s first anything, but i like to think i’d bring him back down to earth a little bit and remind him of what it’s like to be a normal person in a balanced reciprocal relationship lmaoo. getting him away from the waystar and roy family drama…

5. What’s their height difference? Age difference?

> had to look up his height for this… he’s 6'3" and i’m 5’5”.... a VERY NICE height difference if you ask me, PHEW. and as for the ages, my s/is in mid thirties to make my position (HR executive) in the firm more realistic soooo i’d say around 12 years? he is 46 i think?

6. What’s their relationship with each other’s families?

> since he’s an only child (i assume???) his parents would be glad to have someone else to dote on too. they’d also be very happy he’s with me now instead of being connected to the roy family, they did not like the BAD INFLUENCE they were being on his BABY BOY. so we’d visit them pretty often for the holidays etc. meanwhile my folks are in finland so i doubt they’d meet much. but they’d like him well enough for the few times they met since he’s weird but rich and we have a good time together. (and because of the finnish heritage i've headcanoned him to have lol)

i’m gonna count the roys into this because waystar IS ONE BIG FAMILY and because i want to!!!! i truly despise logan (it’s mutual), don’t know how to feel about kendall, vibe with roman and shiv is pretty cold and hostile towards me (understandably lol, i don’t like her either). none of them would like me that much, but i think roman would grow to like me the most over time (because of the double dates we'd go on LMAO). greg’s also a buddy of mine but i’m not sure if i can trust him so i’m very guarded with him. connor and i would also get along well later down the line i think. 

[tonberry-yoda]

Hi! Can I get a matchup please?😭

Fandom: mha

Pronouns: she/her

Sexuality: heterosexual

I'm INFJ-T. I am shy, anxious, kind, smart (i guess), careful, introverted, caring and jealous (i would never say it out loud). I'm melancholic and phlegmatic. I'm scared of lightning. I dont like disrespectful and mean people.

I love reading (i work in a library), watching anime, crocheting, k-dramas and fairy tales, baking and taking care of the dogs and babies.

I am 5,6" tall, chubby (chest and thighs). I have a lot of freckles, hazel eyes, round face and blonde medium length hair with curly ends. I wear glasses and my fashion preference is dark academia/bookcore.

Love language: physical touch (words of affirmation). I am so touch starved pls😭😭😭.

I have social phobia, light misophonia and lots of panic attacks (if you are not comfortable with writting for it its ok)

OMG HI AGAIN!! I've just been knocking out matchup after matchup and you're the last one! you get two today, you should be baffled fr! okay, I think I have a good character for you!

the character I chose for you is...

TENYA IIDA!!!

he admires the little things about you. like how caring and smart you are, he literally cannot take his eyes off of you because of how amazing your personality is

AND YOURE PRETTY

you done struck this man in the heart frrrr

just know that he will be in the library always to... "study"... mhm...

will always have new book recs for you

bring him baked goods when he's stressed and he might shed a tear fr

you two will just sit and read in silence and it's super sweet

just know that when you're stressed out, he will hold you and listen to whatever you have to say

he is always here for you <3

he will always tell you how much he loves you and just stare at how pretty you are all the time

cuddle and introduce him to new shows and TV because he will be immediately sucked into it lmaoo

he will hold you when you need it because gurl, he loves you sm <333

~~~~~

matchup rules --- pinned post

@tonberry-yoda

[darkangel0410]

2, 3, 4, 6, 8, 14

sorry so many its only bc im obsessed with you and love your brain! and really genuinely interested in how it works!

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ Don't apologize, I love talking writing stuff with you!!! This did get super long, tho, so I'm putting it under a cut:

2) What is your favorite fic of yours?

I mean, the real answer is all of them, lbr, but I'm really proud of trouble at my door (the necromancer au!!) because I love the worldbuilding I did, and it's basically the first case fic I ever wrote, and fight scenes that don't lead to sex!!! And a really good sex scene, too, if I do say so myself

3) What fic of yours do you think is underrated?

Hmmm, there's a couple answers for this, one of which is trouble at my door again, lol, but probably (this one) to the grave - it's an ultra rarepair (Chris Kreider/John Tavares), but I love the werewolf worldbuilding I dit, and sometimes I think about revisiting it

4) What fic of yours were you surprised by how popular it was?

Oh, probably any Tkachuks or Hughes (or Fantilis now, I guess lol) fic that gets over like 20 kudos or more than a couple comments, tbh. I get so much pushback from fandom (anon and otherwise) about writing it that it's always weird to me if they do well in that way

6) Do you outline your fics? If so, how?

I do not usually - for a series, I'll make notes as I go so I don't Joss myself, and if there's a case (so basically, necromancer au and in death au lmaoo) I make notes about it, but usually I just have an idea - what if Thom Bordelau was a necromancer? What if Jack Eichel was a crime lord? What if Trevor Zegras was a werewolf? and on and on forever - and then I sit down and start writing it to see what happens. After a few hundred words I mostly know how I want it to end, and what happens to get there. But I don't outline it the way plotters generally do - I tried before, when I was still figuring out my process for writing, but when I do write done everything like that first I don't want to write it anymore because the story feels told to me then, and my brain's satisfied.

8) Do you take inspiration from real life? If so how do you incorporate it into your fics?

Yeah, some - I think to a certain extent every writer does, we can't help it. As for how it ends up in fics...I think it's mostly little things, like. Someone's favorite song or drink - large iced mocha, extra chocolate from DD baybee (Turcs fave btw) - the way they tilt their head to the side when they ask questions, how impatient they are with people sometimes.

I do bring a lot of sex/kink/bdsm experience to my fic, too, I think - not necessarily in the sense that I write everyone having the same kinks as me, but I've been around kink and dungeons almost my whole adult life so there's stuff I know how to write that I'm not always into, and it makes it easier to have seen it done irl, or know someone who's into whatever I'm writing.

It also means I get a lot of people poking at me, through their own fic or in my inbox, about stuff that I've written, but at least there's hardly any death threats any more, unlike when I first started writing bdsm AUs/fics 😂😂😂

14) What is something you wrote in a fic that you are hoping readers picked up on but you don't know if they did? And/or, what is something that you were excited that readers did pick up on?

Oh this is such a good question - there's a couple, really, one of which is in (take this) to your grave by the end of that fic John's a very specific kind of crazy, and I love when readers picked up on that ❤️❤️❤️ there's also a part in the godlings verse where it's explained why Auston always looks so cranky when he's in Toronto (it's because he's the son of Apollo and he loathes cold weather lol) and I love the couple people who picked up on it 💕💕💕

*

Thank you for asking!!!! It was alot of fun!! ❤️❤️❤️ (fic writers ask meme)

[pursuedbyamemoryy]

HI DAWN !! coming into ur inbox (for the first time?! 🙀✨) just to greet ya hehe >:)) i hope u r doing well !!! OKAY just to talk a bit. i've never rlly been into fnaf aside from being rlly invested in lore (i just wasn't an fnaf kid if that makes sense 🥺) BUT AAA MY FRIENDS WHO R INTO IT want to drag me to watch and ofc i will BUT just wondering for fun. did u enjoy!! wld u recommend!! (HEHE HAVE A GOOD DAY) <33 (also i never said yet but u are so based for spiderverse cod rdr. love them all sm. AND HOZIER the best ever. i barely know dead poets society but wld u recommend it !! ;O heehee)

OMG HIIIII!!! i’ve been good, i hope you’re doing well too <33 thank you for checking in 😇😇!!

honestly not being super into fnaf is so valid, i played a couple of games here and only learned the lore like last year because THERES SO MUCH??? and it’s so confusing like wtf? but omg i hope you have fun when you see the movie!!! i def recommend it! they didn’t follow the lore completely but that definitely doesn’t mean it was bad, it was a fun movie, i liked it!! ( except for the other people in the theater because they were so loud and disrespectful the entire movie like it was SO BAD but aside from that i enjoyed it ) josh hutcherson is also so hot in the movie and no i will not shut up about it!!

ALSO AHHHH i miss my spiderverse era omg i was SOOO into it i think i need to rewatch the movies again. and rdr2 is like my favorite game ever i could talk about it for hours genuinely. i’m currently on my second play through and i’m almost done w the game again and i’m going for low honor this time UGHHH IM NOT READY FOR THE ENDING 😭😭 i cried so hard my first play through. i also need to play rdr1 and i even borrowed my friends xbox for it but i’ve always been a pc player so i CANNOT play on a controller like i struggle so bad for no reason LMAOO

HOZIER. DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED UGHHHH i love him so so much his music means everything to me. and i will never shut up about how i saw him live!!! current fav song has to be either i carrion or abstract. or maybe dinner & diatribes. or like his whole discography yk???

as for dps it’s such a good movie!! this sounds so dramatic but tbh it changed the way i view poetry and literature overall ( i was never super into poetry but after watching i’ve taken an interest to it ) as well as just like… life?? and taking different opportunities and doing things you love and such. definitely definitely recommend it <33 - tw for suicide towards the end but everyone just kind of pretends that part never happens LMAO. it’s also like not graphic there’s no blood or anything ( he’s not dead your honor!!! he’s alive and happy and in love!!! )

i rambled a bit but omg y’all!!! talk to me in my inbox more i had sm fun w this HEHE

[wishingwell1111]

7/17/23

omg i'm sorry i haven't been on here in ages

but

i'm 61.4lbs down from my highest weight !!!!

i weighed myself a little bit ago, i shouldn't have since i ate not long ago but i still went down jdksjf

being on my feet so much at my new job has done wonders, i'm meeting and exceeding my step count goals every time i work and sometimes on days off too lol

i'm also getting more muscle definition which i fucking love, especially on my arms i feel so buff lmaoo. they aren't so jiggly anymore, still have a ways to go but still rhskjg it's making me less dysphoric <3<3 i love having muscle, yes it weighs more that fat but i'm still losing weight so idc haha. i don't have long before i'm under 200lbs guys. that is insane to me. i've been fat for so fucking long, i still am, but i've come such a long way. i feel like i've been backsliding this last month or two but i'm working on better self control.

in conclusion, i'm slowly getting where i want and that feels so good <3 i also have been closer w my friends lately and have been going on dates w this really cute girl fhwif she's coming over to my house for the first time today,, in a few hours ! i'm so nervous but excited :) i think we'll have a good time <3 she's fantastic and i'm really hoping this leads to a relationship because i Really like her and she actually feels the same which is still crazy to me. i hope she still likes me when she gets to know me better because i am so fucked in the head 💀 and hate my body so much so !! and my ptsd has been extremely bad lately and being touched has been super triggering but w her i justchekekf i don't wanna have a trauma response and make her feel bad or anything. we did hold hands tho on our dates and i just melted <3<3 tonight better go well because i'm so fucking lonely lmao

so i've been cleaning all day because my space is a mess lol

but yeah that's my ramble of an update haha

[ceilidho]

I just discovered your Miguel/Reader fics on AO3 and I'm absolutely obsessed. Your writing is phenomenal, and super addictive. While I'm waiting for chap3 of Red Dawn, I've been wondering if, in any future fic, you were planning to explore/include the aspect that Miguel is not only a baby thief, but according to his comic book counterpart a brother's girlfriend thief too lmao. His little wife being his brother's girlfriend and then cheating on him with Miguel is just delicious to me.

hi hi!!!! I forgot ppl could ask questions on tumblr lmaoo this is fun

I’m almost done chap 3 by the way 😊 it should be up either tonight or tomorrow depending on how much editing it needs. I’m not 100% sure if I’ll be writing more for Miguel for awhile, just bc I have a few fics I’ve been neglecting and I rly wanna finish, but I do love the girlfriend thief idea !!! Maybe I will as like a short prompt or something!!

[jupitercomet]

Bugs, you can't just-

You can't just write that:

“No, toots,” Bradley smears your hairline with kisses. “I’m too big for you, baby, it won’t fit. Don’t wanna hurt ya.”

My size kink just went brrrr. But this was like probably the best smut I've read. You need to give us a break (don't!), it's like every other day is horny day.

But now I'm looking forward to a snippet about Jake and angel. I think he gets turned on by the mere fact that she's letting him touch her again. But I'm still like super interested to hear what kinks they have (it's Jake, so I expect something like super raunchy).

I read that you're currently working on the next Bob chapter - you have no idea how much I look forward to it.

I also loved that pic where Jake and Bradley were like: Bob, we think you can do more. And Bob just said: I don't. 😭 I realted s much, it was hilarious.

But how are you bugs? What are you doing? How are the 💫cats💫?

do not say that, I'll get cocky 😤😤😤!!!!!!! but thank you <3 I am merely responding to y'alls horny energy (also my period started today so that's my excuse)

and I have very much been thinking about Jake's version. I'm just waiting for an excuse to write it lmaoo

yes! I'm done with Bradley's chapter, working on Bob's, and have half a scene of Jake's done so I'm very excited to get those out :)

Bob is doing his best but he will not do more than that. idk why but my favorite one is the "nine toes" one it cracks me up 😭

I'm pretty good, just eating rn. and the cats are doing quite well, I think Apollo had the zoomies today bc he was going ham rolling around on the carpet! how are you?

[theoutcastedartist]

How are you? I hope you are well.

Thank you. I know you probably meant to send this as a light thing, but unfortunately you caught me at a very off time

Warning for VENT post.

Ngl I'm probably gonna come off as super whiny and annoying so if you don't wanna see that, just ignore this. I really just can't fucking take it anymore. I'll probably delete this in the morning when the shame of my actions come to haunt me right before work. Haha. I'm still working on my normal art stuff, if you're wondering.

Technically thing have been good for me, I got my first STABLE job and it's working with dogs! And my manager is impressed with my serious work ethic

haha my overwhelming need to Not-Be-A-Disappointment-And-Prove-I-Am-More-Than-My-Deformities-Despite-Having-Them-Recitfied-With-Surgery-Meaning-Theyre-Not-Even-Noticable-And-Weird-"Girl"-Behavior-To-My-Own-Detriment comes in handy even after high school ... my knees... my ankles... they do not love me...

But yeah, as far as things are going, technically they are going well!

But honestly, I just want to curl up in a hole and cry. Not that I will anytime soon, given how I've learned at this point that me expressing genuine emotion that is not "Chill/Go with the Flow" is such a Weird Thing for everyone around me... I guess I'm still processing that I am An Actual Adult(tm) now and that I'm just too tired and scared of what the future will be... and just how lost I feel about where I even WANT to go in my life.

Especially when I've realized how much of my childhood was spent me being forced to act like an adult because of some of the people and circumstances surrounding my life, so I couldn't really properly, I guess, enjoy it???? There were so many good opportunities I missed, including two years of FREE COLLEGE because of a series of incidents with one of my parents... and medical neglect of my younger sibling's ATV accident injury, which turned into a WHOLE other mess I had to miss almost 2 weeks of school for... right before going online for COVID-19 too... sigh.

Idk I just wish I could have done more with the time I had before graduating high school like 5 months ago. I was top of my class, but now it just feels like I'm letting everyone who ever believed in me for whatever reason down for not immediately going to college.

And like I KNOW it doesn't matter what others think I should or shouldn't do in regards to taking a break from school or just my own life in general, but it still doesn't make it any easier for me mentally I guess. I just feel guilty and awful and like I'm back in elementary school again, except it's with people who now have insanely high expectations of me because I've always "Beaten the Odds Againt Me", "The Will Power to Go Far in Life" or whatever of that sort of bs rather than "Born Deformed, is Weird, and Most Likely Won't Make it Far in Life" kind of expectation.

It just feels like one thing after another and I'm just... so tired of it. I'm tired of forcing myself to spin just shit awful situations as a positive thing for everyone else's comfort (oh a "Learning Experience" or "Now I'm More Prepared for the Future" and "This Would be Good for a College Application" lmaoo)

Especially with all the recent stuff I've realized, like how my parents treat my siblings and I is probably some form of abuse (something I did not want to confront for years) and just how fucking traumatized I am (haha no wonder my fav is Sad Little White Boy from TOH).

And literally yesterday, my mom's car, who I rely on as transport to and from work, broke down when she had gone to take my siblings to the dermatologist to get a mole checked out (turns out it was completely fine and normal, as I 100% expected).

So while I was at work, my younger siblings were stranded with our god awful mother at god knows where since around 10 am, and couldn't be picked up until my brother called my geometry teacher from MY freshman year of high school (and his best friend's mom) to go pick them up, and then come pick me up after my shift ended, which I had no clue about until I was walking out of the door of my workplace and saw them waiting for me, I was fully expecting to walk home that afternoon in my wet and nasty scrubs, reeking like an actual doghouse (cause I work with the doggos as my job), under direct heavy sunlight, and 90 degree heat. So I at least avoided walking then. Today I was lucky enough to have my dad be my transport, and tomorrow morning he can drop me off an hour before my shift starts. Though I'm worried for tomorrow after work and I'm worried about what the weather might be like (given there's a hurricane/tropical storm coming and all that...) and if it'll be safe for me to even walk home.

I don't know anyone at work well enough to give me a ride, no matter how many times my dad tells me to "just ask". The guilt of being any sort of burden to anyone will always be heavier to me than any consequences as a result of not asking or accepting any kind of help. Like I'd rather walk three hours to get home in the pouring rain and risk getting hit by some idiot driver while crossing the street, than ask someone to drop me off on the way when my house is like literally 5 minutes away by car.

It's so stupid I don't even understand why I'm like this and thinking about it makes me wanna cry, but I CANT cry because it's inconvenient for everyone else and I just generally S U CK at processing my own emotions and its a complete waste of time to try and do so and my stupid intrusive thoughts won't leave me the fuck alone when I'm in the middle of doing BASIC ASS CHORES.

And I just fucking resent my parents so much for all the shit they put me through over the years, making me be the "voice of reason" between any arguments between them. They willingly decide to have their fights in front of me and then try to egg me into joining them. Like literally over the period of time where I was stuck at home looking for work online, I would just be eating my lunch at the table in the emptiness of the house and the minute the two of them happen to be under the same roof, they decide to bitch at each other RIGHT IN FRONT OF WHERE I AM EATING.

There is a WHOLE ASS HOUSE for you two to bitch at each other and yet you do it RIGHT. I FRONT. OF. ME. while I'm eating noodles too... asshole.

Hell, my mom is literally the reason my siblings and I ended up in the foster care system for TWO. FUCKING. YEARS. They almost separated me from one of my siblings because of his autism and ADHD (and you know how fuck awful the system is to older kids who are deemed to be "problematic") combined with my "low self-esteem" and Cleft Lip nonsense going on at the time too. I don't even want to think what would have happened had I not begged my fosterdad for two weeks straight to take in my other sibling too. It's super rare for fosterhomes to take in sibling pairs, much less a Trio like my brothers and I.

Nevermind how shitty all the "court ordered" therapists I've ever had are. Literally one of them would belittle me and my problems, acted like I was too stupid to talked to like a normal person. She was suppose to help me with my "low self esteem" with these stupid packets and instead turned it into a trigger for me like 5 years later lmaoooo

Literally happened during my AP psych class, my teacher brought up "low self-esteem" and "fostercare" in the same sentence (and some kid made a Shazam joke I think???) and I immediately had a silent panic attack at my desk with my head down.

God and on top of being a foster kid, my 5th grade teacher just fucking had to OUT ME as one to the entire class. A foster kid to gay parents, you can imagine how that school year went.

Like how goddamn petty as an adult do you have to be to repeatedly target a 5th grader??? No because that shit stressed me out so much at the time on top of everything else, on top of being bullied by the other girls, the teacher even fat shaming me a couple times (when at the time I was VERY unnaturally thin, no matter how much I tried to gain weight.) I legit started ripping out chunks of my hair from my scalp during class and peeling the skin off my fingers with my teeth to the point of bleeding as a very fucking up coping mechanism that "soothed" me. The only reason any kind of school intervention was made because the assistant principal happened to do a classroom observation on my teacher on a particularly bad day for me where the teacher made me sit all the way at the front of the class and the environment of the class happened to be very overwhelming to my brain too. I remember it so vividly too it felt like this fuck awful metallic buzzing noise before everything became totally silent for a good 10 minutes.

I just hope and pray to whatever god or being of higher power out there that I NEVER have to hear that noise ever again. It was just so bad, whatever it was...

I literally still have a couple hidden bald patches than haven't recovered since like the rest of my hair and I still chew at the skin of my fingers at the first instance of me being stressed. They're always so sore...

I'm just so fucking tired. Of everything. I just wanna skip to the part of my life where I'm not walking on eggshells every waking moment of my life. I just wanna have my own space cuddled up on a rainy day with a pet. I wanna be able to cry freely and just not have to worry for once. I can't even remember a time where I was ever TRULY happy, even as far back as elementary school there wasn't a moment where I didn't want to dissappear.

I just want to be held while I cry and be told that everything will be okay, but that's not going to happen so there's no point in hoping for that to ever happen.

ANYWHO I HAVE A ZOOM MEETING FOR WORK IN LIKE 30 MINUTES I AM NOT OKAY :D

[twow]

okay guys i am officially done with my first real week of law school so here's law school update #2!! tbh its been a really fun time! people here are so nice, ive been to the bars the last couple of nights and out of the 6 drinks i've had 5 of them have been bought for me by guys in the law school section LMAO. i didn't go out at all in undergrad so its been a nice change of pace! school is a bit overwhleming and i feel a bit lost but i am kind of getting the hang of it? we'll have to see how next week goes. the rest is under the cut bc i got kind of ramble-y and its long!

okay so for my friend group i simultaneously feel more ingrained in the group and like an outsider. i really love them and we've all gone out together a lot but i cant shake the feeling that's there's an inner circle i'm not a part of idk. i know its probably just insecurity and high school trauma and also the unshakeable feeling that i am unknowable and cannot and should not be my true self around people (with the exception of my irl besties from undergrad ofc). i am hoping that horrible feeling passes and i honestly just can't wait to get out of the beginning parts of the friendship and into the part where i actually feel like i know these people well. esp with this handful of girls I've been getting close to! but yeah ngl i am feeling a bit mixed right now since there's a lot of guys in our group and I've never really had guy friends? there's this sort of ugly feeling like im less important to them bc im not hot like the rest of the girls in the group which is :/// we also sort of had some drama last night so i guess what everyone said about law school being like high school is true LMAOO anyway we are going to the beach today so hopefully things will work itself out.

i also feel like i really embarrassed myself the last couple of nights while drunk. everyone has reassured me that i didn't but still i really really hate the feeling of not remembering exactly what i did/said. shoutout to the girlies and also my friend scott for making me feel a lot better about it <3 anyway in general my mood is very "is everyone hanging out without me?" and "do people secretly dislike me and don't really care about me?" even tho i have evidence to the contrary. mental illness.

edit: okay I've thought about it and the best way to concisely articulate how i feel is that i feel like an afterthought. like ill be invited to places and people will talk to me/hang out with me but i am never the first one on people's mind nor do people really care if i do/do not come. and when im chatting its more like "oh i guess ill talk to her" and im initiating a lot rather than people coming up to me and really wanting to talk to me. and that's fine i guess it just a bit hurtful esp when you see others who do get actually approached for convos and have people upset when they don't come places.

i am also realizing that this post was pretty negative but i AM having a good time and i DO like my friends. I'm just sick of the beginning part i love having really good friends that I'm super close to and i don't really have that yet. its been super fun tho esp at bar trivia and all of my theme park visits

okay update over, thanks for listening to my rambling guys! it really helps me to write all of my feelings out even if no one really cares. that is what a blog is for i guess! also if i know you in real life and you reading this No You Did Not lol

[jiminxoxo]

hopefully the boys get well soon and the tour resumes :(

well, I DID WANT YOU TO GO ON A RAMBLE ABOUT IT 😌😌

sheeshhh a rlly old k-pop stan 😮

TIME OUT BWHAHA 💀😭

idk about the kim garam situation or just le sserafirm in general, what do you think about that & them?!!! i wanna know from someone(you) who likes them but also is like sorta unbiased abt things?! if i make sense?! 😅

i strongly believe you'd be that type of a person 😌💕

i was just gonna ask WHAT ARE YOU? 50? hahahahaha

we've all been through the emo/obsessed over an artist/band phase lifee!! lessssgoooooo 😭😭���� ( P. S we haven't rlly gotten over that phase yet 🤡😇)

BOY THE FLEX 🦾😌😌 that's rlly cuteeee 🥺💕 I'm v proud of them too,they all deserve it <3 & I'm glad you find sm comfort in them (jimin XD) 🥺 AND PLS PLS SHOW ME YOUR CATTTT ☹️☹️💕💕💕

I'm sure you'd have a good idea of a lot of groups in kpop :0

i haven't rlly been into kpop for a long time I've followed BP since 2020 but i properly got into kpop from oct 2021 smth !! do you wanna hear the backstory lmao?!

i don't rlly have any semi-ults?! except bts, pentagon, tbz(i haven't had much time to consume sm tbz& pentagon content 😭 and making them two of my ults XD which might happen soon tho 👀) & bp(they've been away for so long :( i feel like I've sorta lost smth w them bruh)

so, my ult beloveds are got7, svt, exo, monsta x, atz, skz, shinee, mamamoo, DKZ (formerly dongkiz & their former leader when he comes back :[ obv ), wonho & a bunch of solo artists!! & in no order lmaoo

EGGFCUKNSACTLY ‼️😣 bruh like I'm not in any pov of glimpse of us yet it makes all 😣💔 when i listen to it each & every.damn.time !!! usss 🫂 single all life gang 😎🤧

omg we are so similar pls 😭✋🏻 i honestly enjoy being single a lil way too muchhh ( also ahem ahem, how feel single when we have blogs like yours 😌💘 )

bruh there was a glitch in the anon ask so i could add songs and i did, but i tapped on the ask anonymous by mistake so now when i go back to being anonymous it's all gone urghhh ://

i don't listen much to joji either but i will suggest you a few of my favs ofc <3

DANCING IN THE DARK

SANCTUARY

DAYLIGHT

TEST DRIVE

lmk how you like these ‼️

AN INTRO POST YAYAY LESSGOO

well not everyone can address you 자기야 so 😌😌✋🏻

(🍯)

this is my girl mochi! she’s the sweetest girl ever :)

that’s awesome!! we love being a multistan in this household 😌🫶 and omg we LOVE an exo stan wtf!!! there aren’t many exols these days and it’s really sad but i’m glad the fandom got a cleanse 💀 it was starting to get really toxic.

i mainly just casually listen to le sserafims music (sour grapes is that bitch), the situation with g*ram seems pretty plain and simple to me. always believe the victim until proven otherwise. in her case, there’s proof of what she’s done and her receiving a level 5 punishment from her school says enough for me. i don’t like to consume myself with this sort of stuff and outwardly send hate (i don’t hate her because i don’t personally know her. think of it as a deep despise lmao) because there’s other things i could be doing, but i feel a lot of sympathy towards the other lovely girls because they’ve been through enough (it’s super hard to make it in the industry as is and that kind of negative spotlight on them at such an early stage is sooo harmful for their career) yunjin is my gal tho i love her to bits 🫶

ohhh i’ll definitely take a look at those songs and give you a little review next time! thanks for the suggestions <3 !!!

[mochalate]

mocha mocha mocha!! i am dropping by with a few things i find pretty bc april is so very pretty to me! 🍞🌻💭🌷☀️🫧✨🌱💗🍓 how are you?? i hope the month is lovely to you 🥺

i also come back with a curious sel question 🤓 a more technical writing one but, what is your anchor point to writing a character like osamu or atsumu? what part of them do you like exploring and what quality of theirs stays the same to you across any universe you put them in? 🥺

hi!!!!

I'm actually really bad at writing AUs 😭 So I don't know if I'm answering your question properly.

(I mean, I've never really been into them, so it's not the most fun for me to write and I haven't done it much, which is why I'm bad at it but still!!)

Other than that, to be honest I really do go off of vibes. 🤭 I was a theatre kid for 3 years and even though I was always in production or direction, we all had to participate in everything so I know how getting in character works; so I'm like, basically letting myself be possessed by Atsumu and Osamu when I'm doing their POV 😫

When I was younger (like 14-15), I had these percy jackson oc fic, and I for REAL was fighting feelings of parental abandonment while watching TV with my perfectly present dad every evening after school because I got too in the oc's head LMAOO

i mean, I distinctly remember being depressed, thinking huh what's up with me, and the voice in my head just went like "nobody wants me..." and it was such a #holdup moment 😭

If we're talking about Atsumu vs Osamu, the main difference in the vibe I think, for me-

a) atsumu is this massively confident guy, who's never had a setback (in the sense that he's super convinced that putting in effort=you will get the result you want, if you don't it's because you didn't put in enough work and that's fixable). this is a negative thing sometimes because he takes on too much personal responsibility for EVERYTHING, even the things he can't control

vs b) osamu, who definitely has a more realistic? pessimistic?? outlook on how things work, and yeah he's reasonably confident about his life but he's definitely going to have a bigger rainy day fund than atsumu; and a lot of his bravado, while not a facade, is a learned response to not lose to atsumu in any way 🤭

so that, I think, in any universe would stay the same!