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tortillamastersblog · 2 days

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♕ No Matter What - Part 12 | Lena Luthor ♕

Pairing: Lena Luthor x reader

Warnings: violence

Summary: The dinner with Lena doesn’t exactly go as planned. . .

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A permanent smile is etched on my face as I hurry to the convenience store. Not even the rain, or the cold can dampen my mood right now.

A gust of wind whips some rain in my face, so I pull my hood even further over my head and look down, focusing on not stepping into puddles.

I’ve always liked the rain, especially the sound of it against the pavement or a window, but I don’t like the cold that is starting to set in.

It’s the beginning of October and as I keep walking I think of everything that’s going to happen from now on.

Will Lena and I spend Halloween together? Is she one for dressing up?

What about Thanksgiving? Would she be up to celebrate with me, Sam, and Ruby, or does she want to keep what we have between just the two of us for a while?

And what about Christmas? And New Year’s?

What about my contract? When do I sign my resignation letter? When will I officially no longer be Lena’s bodyguard?

All those questions fill my head as I keep walking with my head down.

When I get to the store, I make quick work of getting everything we need before heading back out with a spring in my step.

I can’t wait to get back and see where the rest of the night goes. We’ll probably cook together, listening to music, then eat on the couch, watching a movie.

I’m not so sure about our sleeping arrangements from now on, but I’ll just wait and see how the night goes.

I grin like an idiot and think of Lena and how her lips tasted on mine. They were warm and soft and the kiss was more than I could have ever dreamed of.

She is incredible and I can’t believe she actually likes me even after I told her about Noah.

I’m so lost in thought that I don’t notice a figure stepping out of a dark alley to my left until it’s already too late.

With a sickening thud, a baseball bat makes contact with my back and I yelp, dropping to the ground. The groceries I just bought spill out of the paper bag and the bottle of Lena’s favorite wine I had enough afterthought to buy breaks on the curb. My whole back stings and my arms and legs tingle as a numb feeling spreads through them.

I writhe in pain and gasp for air like a fish out of water as the rain pelts down on me.

The guy that attacked me, bends down beside me. He has his hood pulled over his head and I can’t make out his face, but I do see the sickening smile that pulls at his lips.

“Tell Ms. Luthor her brother sends his regards.”

That’s all the he says before stalking off, his long coat billowing behind him as he vanishes around a corner.

I continue to try and catch my breath, whimpering every time I move because a blinding pain shoots up my spine and into my head.

I close my eyes and focus on breathing, partly aware of my now wet sweatpants sticking to my skin.

In and out.

Who was that guy? And what does Lex want from Lena? Have they been in contact? If so, why hasn’t she told me about it?

Minutes go by and I continue to stay on the ground, shaking. I haven’t been in this much pain since being shot in the shoulder.

A tear trickles down my cheek, mixing with the rain on my skin and I let out an involuntary sob.

Just a few minutes ago everything was perfect and the prospect of cooking dinner with Lena made me feel warm all over.

Now, I’m just cold.

After what feels like forever the sharp pain in my back finally subsides, leaving behind a dull ache.

It hurts when I breathe and I assume it’s because my spine and ribs are injured, but I have to get home somehow and because there’s not a single soul around to help me, I drag myself to my feet with a groan after gathering all the groceries off the ground.

The paper bag they were in is wet and falling apart, so I leave it along with the broken bottle of wine and carry everything else scooped up against my stomach.

I stumble back home, my back throbbing painfully in time with my racing heart and my uneven breaths and open the door to the apartment with trembling hands.

The warmth from inside does little to comfort me in my soaked clothes and I shudder, putting the groceries down by the door before slipping off my shoes.

Just then, Lena comes walking out of the bedroom, running a brush through her damp hair. She looks cozy in my shirt and sweatpants and for a split second I forget about what just happened.

“You sure did take your time,” she jokes, not really looking at me as she heads to her phone on the kitchen island.

I chuckle softly and slump back against the door. My eyes flutter shut and I lift a shaky hand to unzip my drenched jacket.

“You know, I was thinking we could watch that movie you told me about last week. What was it again? The Imitation Game?”

“Yeah,” I mumble, wincing when I peel my jacket off my body. It lands on the ground with a wet thud and I slump back against the door to catch my breath.

“Great. Now, did you get everything we need or— Oh my God ?!” I feel hands on my face within the next few seconds and I revel in the way the simple touch makes my skin tingle.

My eyes open slowly to find Lena watching me with wide and worry-filled eyes. Her hands rund down my neck and over my shoulders and I wince when the light pressure makes my back sting.

She immediately moves her hands back up and cups my cheeks again. “What happened? Where does it hurt?”

“M-my back. . .” Is all I manage to get out and Lena is quick to grab the hem of my hoodie.

Her eyes meet mine in silent question and I just nod, letting her guide the fabric up and over my head. I choke back a whimper when my arms drop back down to my side and don’t object when Lena’s hands land on my hips to turn me around.

Under different circumstances I’d be swooning, feeling her hands on me like this, but right now I just feel miserable.

“Oh my God, Y/N. . . Who did this to you?” she asks quietly, her voice breaking. Her warm hands travel up the side of my waist, but stop below where the bat struck.

She doesn’t dare to touch what I’m assuming is an already angry looking bruise and I’m thankful for it.

“We have to get you to a hospital,” she says. “Your spleen could have ruptured, or your lungs could be bruised. I’ll call Alfred to come and pick us up. Just wait here.”

“No, Lena we can’t. It’s too public,” I object, turning back around to face her.

Her eyebrows are pulled together in disbelief and she takes my hand, squeezing it. “It doesn’t matter. You’re hurt and—“

“No,” I say sternly. “We can’t.”

She pulls her hand back and clenches her jaw. “Why are you being so stubborn about this?! This isn’t about me! This is about you. You’re hurt and I’m not just going to stand here and do nothing about it. You need to see a doctor, Y/N!”

“It is about you!” I snap. “The guy who did this told me to tell you that Lex sends his regards!”

Lena’s whole face drops and she pales visibly. “What?”

I nod and hang my head shamefully, feeling bad for having snapped at her. I made it sound like she’s the reason this happened, so I step forward and take her hand, lacing our fingers together.

“I’m sorry. That came out wrong,” I say softly. “It’s not your fault this happened.”

Lena shakes her head with watery eyes and her chin begins to wobble. “No, no it is. I can’t believe this. I’m so sorry.”

“Stop, this is not your fault,” I say, closing the distance between us to wrap my arms around her in a hug. My back protests when she reciprocates the embrace, but I do my best to ignore it and focus on her. “Your brother is a grade A asshole and you have nothing to apologize for. Got it?”

Lena stays silent and I lean back to meet her eyes with raised eyebrows. “Got it?”

She sighs and blinks back her tears before nodding. I hum, satisfied, and press a lingering kiss to her forehead.

“You should still get your back looked at,” she argues weakly, one of her hands moving to lay flat against the small of my back.

“Lena, I can’t—“

“Yes you can,” she interrupts, her eyes widening when an idea comes to her. She pulls away completely and grabs her phone from the kitchen island. “Kara’s sister, Alex, is a doctor at a nearby government research facility. I’m sure she’ll be able help.”

I want to object but Lena’s already on the phone with Alex, explaining the situation and nodding along to whatever the woman on the other end is saying.

I shiver, still soaking wet, and head to the bedroom to change into a new set of comfortable clothes.

It’s a bit of a struggle to get a sweatshirt over my head, so I opt for a zip-up hoodie, sighing when the soft fabric makes contact with my tender back.

I sit on the edge of my bed and rub my eyes with a tired sigh.

“You ready?” Lena asks a few minutes later, appearing in the doorway with her phone in her hand.

“I guess,” I say quietly. “But what about dinner?”

Her eyes soften. “Let’s postpone it until you’re feeling better.”

I pout and hang my head. I was really looking forward to cooking with her but she’s right. I really need to get checked out to make sure I don’t have any internal bleeding.

“Okay, let’s go,” I say, getting up and following Lena out of the apartment after we both put on some shoes and a jacket.

Alfred’s already waiting for us and ushers us into the car before driving off.

The radio is turned off and the only sound I can focus on is the rain against the windshield and Lena’s soft breathing next to me.

I can feel her watching me, especially when we drive over a bump in the road and I wince, but I don’t acknowledge it. I’m still trying to process what happened and I’m not in the mood to talk right now.

So, instead, I move my hand to the space between us and turn it so my palm is facing up.

Lena’s eyes drop down and she gets what I want immediately, sliding her hand into mine and intertwining our fingers with a soft squeeze.

I lean my head against the window and close my eyes.

I must have drifted off for a few minutes because when Lena squeezes my hand and I open my eyes, I notice that we’re parked outside a huge glass skyscraper with two towers.

Lena gives me an encouraging nod and disconnects our hands so we can get out after Alfred opens the door from outside.

It’s still raining, so we hurry toward the dimly-lit lobby where I noticed a dark figure already waiting for us.

As we come closer I recognize her as Kara’s sister and she wordlessly leads us inside, past two security guards who eye us with some curiosity.

We take a glass elevator up a couple of floors and when we step out, I’m blinded by fluorescent lights.

The lobby was mostly dark and deserted, but up here the place is bustling with people. We get a few weird looks here and there, but no one actually seems to mind our presence.

Alex leads us down a hallway before turning right and entering a spacious room. Theres an examination table right in the middle of it and it’s surrounded by a heart rate monitor and other medical equipment I can’t put a name to.

“So, Lena told me what happened and I think it’s best if we do an ultrasound first,” Alex says, gesturing for me to get on the examination table.

I nod wordlessly and get on the table, looking up to find Lena standing by the door, anxiously chewing on her thumb. She hasn’t said a word since we left the apartment and I have the feeling it’s because she feels guilty for what happened.

“Could you maybe take off your hoodie?” Alex asks, pulling my attention away from the young CEO and I nod, taking it off with a wince.

I don’t know her all that well, but I have met her a couple of times because she sometimes joins Kara and Lena’s lunch get-togethers.

“Alright, now just lie back and try to relax,” she says, smiling softly when she senses my ever growing anxiety.

What if I’m actually seriously injured? Will I need surgery? Where will I stay? More importantly, where will Lena stay?

I swallow thickly and do as I’m told, lying down with a poorly suppressed whimper. It seems to snap Lena out of her trance and she wordlessly joins my side, tentatively placing her hand on my shoulder.

Alex glances between the two of us with an unreadable expression before squirting some ultrasound gel onto the transducer.

She turns off the light and takes a seat next to the examination table before getting to work.

The gel is cold on my skin and I suck in a breath, feeling Lena tense beside me.

Alex raises an eyebrow. “You okay?”

I nod sheepishly and ball my hands into fists. “Yeah. Sorry. It’s just a little cold.”

She smiles softly and gets back to doing whatever it is she’s doing, running the transducer all over my abdomen.

I look at the screen of the ultrasound machine even though I don’t know what I’m supposed to be looking for. Everything looks blurry, a mix of grays, blacks and whites, but it must mean something to Alex because after a while she stops and hands me some paper towels to wipe off the excess gel.

“Well, you don’t have any internal bleeding as far as I can tell. You’re kidneys and your spleen are both in tact,” she says, getting up to turn the lights back on.

Lena lets out a barely audible breath of relief and helps me sit up.

“Thank you, Alex.” I say. “For doing this, I mean.”

“Of course,” she says softly, gesturing for me to stand up and turn around so she can examine my back and ribs.

Her hands carefully run down the length of my spine and I gasp, biting my tongue to stop myself from crying out in pain. Then, she moves her hands to press on either side of my ribcage and again I squeeze my eyes shut to will away the tears pooling in the corner of my eyes.

When she finally stops touching me, I start shaking and I stumble sideways. Lena is quick to put her hands on my shoulders and guides me to lean against the examination table.

Her eyes are filled with worry, raking up and down my body before they meet mine. Her eyebrows are furrowed and the look she’s giving me is heartbreaking, so I try to reassure her with a small smile.

It has the exact opposite effect though because it’s more of a grimace than a smile, and Lena bites the inside of her cheek and averts her eyes.

“Alright, as far as I can tell nothing is broken, but we should get an x-Ray of your back just to make sure,” Alex says, scribbling something down on a notepad.

I nod and let her lead me into a small, adjacent room, leaving Lena behind.

The room is equipped with an x-ray machine and Alex makes quick work of getting all the shots she needs before taking me back to the other room.

“You can put your clothes back on,” she says, taking a seat by one of the computers.

Lena grabs my hoodie and holds it up so I can slip it on without straining my back too much. I thank her quietly and go to stand next to Alex who while I got dressed, pulled up the images of my x-rays on the computer.

She zooms in on my spine and ribs, looking for fractures while explaining what exactly she’s looking for.

Lena joins my side, her shoulder brushing against my arms as she leans forward to get a better look herself.

Her eyebrows are furrowed in concentration and her eyes shine with interest as Alex goes on talking and I can’t help but watch her rather than listen to what Alex is saying.

Only when she sighs in relief do I direct my attention back to Alex who’s smiling softly, having obviously noticed my distraction.

“So?” I asks, feeling slightly embarrassed that I didn’t hear what she ultimately said.

“You’re going to be okay,” she says. “Just take it easy for a couple of days and put ice on your back if necessary.”

I smile, relieved, and thank her with a heartfelt handshake.

“No problem,” she says, turning off all the lights and leading us back to the elevator.

When we get to the lobby, Lena hugs her tightly, something I didn’t dare to do because I don’t know her that well.

They exchange a few hushed pleasantries and after Alex assures her she’ll say hi to Kara from her, we part ways.

Alfred, who hasn’t moved the car, gets out of it and opens the door for us with a polite nod.

The drive home is silent just like the way over and I close my eyes, feeling a wave of exhaustion wash over me.

I noticed Lena keeping somewhat of a distance between the two of us while Alex was around, probably because this thing between us, whatever it is, is still brand new, but now she’s basically glued to my side.

She’s sitting in the middle seat, one of her hands in mine while the other is curled around my arm.

She looks at our intertwined hands, lost in thought, but I don’t ask her about it until we’re back at the apartment.

“Are you alright?” I ask when we settle down on the couch after ordering some takeout. “You’re awfully quiet. . .”

Lena cuddles into my side, mindful of my back, and takes my hand to run her fingers over my knuckles. “I just. . . I’m scared, Y/N. I knew Lex wanted to get back at me for testifying against him during his trial, but I never thought he’d target you.”

“I get it,” I say, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “You have a right to be scared, but you need to know that it’s not your fault. This scares me, too, I’m not going to lie, but my number one priority— no matter what happens between us— is to keep you safe.”

Lena hums and rests her head against my chest, her eyes focused on the black screen of the turned-off TV.

I know I’m not getting through to her, but I don’t want to push her, so I close my eyes and rest my cheek against the top of her head.

Tomorrow’s a new day and we can talk more then. For now I just want to eat dinner and go to bed.

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Hi! Sorry for the delay, but like I said I’m super busy at the moment, so updates will be a little slow.

Tag list: @nerethos @orange15quote @nuianced-tck-enby @autorasexy @unexpected-character @nothisismax @wandatasha

#x reader #dc universe #dcu #lena luthor #lena luthor x reader #supergirl cw

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reorientation · 2 days

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It's the anon that shared her deadname with you a few days ago 😵‍💫😵‍💫 I don't know if I'm the only one who shared it but my name is just soo embarrassing to actually spell out again I need you to do it for me instead >.<. I wanted to tell you I bought myself my first dildo. I was scared since I haven't fit anything else inside me that thick that it would be too big, so I even bought a second one 😵‍💫. It's so fucking humiliating, I thought the first dildo I bought would be to fuck or top someone else but my pussy is the one getting fucked 🥺. It hasn't arrived yet but I'm so fucking excited to get addicted to cock and be unable to turn back to the top trans man I used to be no matter how hard I try. I thought you deserved to know how much of a slut I'm turning into because I love your posts so much.

~ Angelina💕

Angelina here again sir🥺 you mentioned my name reminds you of an obedient wife and mother. how can i aspire to be a submissive and obedient wife and mommy to a man? how can i offer my full submission to him? how can i serve him in every aspect of life and just become his bitch? 😵‍💫 i'm so fucking confused daddy, i need as much help as i can get💕 i need to submit to men so badly

(Previously, though she sent me the first part of this before I even answered that last ask)

Oh, Angelina, you sweet little thing. Did you really think that you could be a top, much less a "man"? That must have been terribly confusing - trying to figure out how to fuck someone when you just have that drippy little hole between your legs begging to be fucked.

You clearly have the makings of a cute little cocksleeve, though: getting scared of the dildo you ordered before it even got there. It's fun to fuck a girl when she's a little scared of it, you know? I can just picture the timorous look in your eyes as I pushed your legs back and got ready to push my cock inside you.

As for your aspirations... You're already on your way, little angel. Giving up your ideas about being in charge, looking to a man for approval and guidance, dreaming about being made into an obedient wife and sweet little mommy: all of those are brave steps towards being the good girl you want to be. In the end, all you really have to do is hold the goal in mind and let your natural inclinations guide you to it - until you find a man who will tell you what your goals are and take your decisions away.

#reor: angelina #kink interactions #reorientation writing #reor: anon ask #ftm misgendering kink #ftm girl #ftm detransition kink #ftm breeding

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drdemonprince · 3 hours

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Heyyo - autist here who’s still figuring out my physical and emotional needs. I use weed every day, and part of me has shame around this (as I am a “professional” and supposedly it’s “bad for you”, and it costs money) and the other part of me says “fuck it, there’s no moral value in not using drugs and you should do what you need to”. I guess I’m wondering what perspectives you can offer on this. I’m ruminating on it a bit lately and need some outside people to share their thoughts to get me out of that cycle. Thnx

I find that I am a lot more in tune with my bodily sensations and emotions when I am high, and that I find it easier to enjoy things and to chat amiably with random people when I'm high too. It makes life easier and more pleasant to such an extent that I wonder if I ought to smoke weed daily to medicate all my Problems and Difficulties and general irritation at of most aspects of existence. But then I don't. Because I get freaked out by the brain foggy weed hangover that drifts into the next day, and I assume that it will be bad for my writing to be high, and perhaps most of all, because I am terrified of building up a really high weed tolerance and then needing to use a ton to feel anything, or to even return to a baseline.

A couple years back I tried out vaping almost nightly for a few months, and it definitely reached a point where simply *not* being high felt like being anxious, it seemed, so I decided pretty quickly to reduce my weed intake. I don't like NEEDING any substance to function or to just feel okay. so for now I keep it to the weekends. I often think of using weed more often than that, and kind of want to, but i don't.

The research on chronic long-term weed use is quite encouraging! There are no cognitive or motivational downsides to using weed every day, or even multiple times per day. Conversely, there are many emotional and psychological benefits. @testdevice and I discussed the latest scientific research on the subject at length here:

youtube

There's really only one rub to the study's findings: people who use weed multiple times per day have a baseline lower mood than people who use weed frequently, but not quite that often. NOW THIS IS NOT A CAUSAL RELATIONSHIP. Chronic heavy weed use is not CAUSING people to be more depressed -- it simply seems to be the case that people who are chronically depressed are reaching more frequently for weed to cope with it.

The study shows weed use does raise mood including for members of that group, so there really is no serious drawback to using marijuana here!

But It does align with a finding that I've made in my personal life: the moments when I want to use weed the most frequently are when something in my life is completely out of wack. When I'm super overworked and stressed out, the temptation is to use weed as a way to down-regulate my anxiety, but what actually works far better for me is taking actual steps to reduce stress in my life. I COULD use weed for depression or for failing to find life activities enjoyable, and it works, but it's also worth asking myself which aspects of my life need to change so that I can feel less depressed and get through the day feeling okay. negative emotions are a signal that something in life is going wrong and needs to be fixed, and I do not want to ignore that alarm system.

Those are just some things to think about. Personally, I think that if you have some ability to make choices in your life that can improve your general circumstances, it's better to do that than to use weed to make a life that sucks a little more tolerable. But if daily weed use is helping make your life better or less hard, the weed itself is not the problem!

Lots of people determine that daily weed use has considerable benefits for them with relatively few costs. For me, using a couple times per week is what hits that sweet spot. but ymmv.

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hazbinfallinginaspiral · 2 days

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Enchanted (Vox x Faere!reader) (Part 4)

<- Part 3 - Interlude - (links aren’t working rn)

Word count: 12288

CW! Hurt/comfort, another argument, hypnosis heavy, lots of praise in the context of a Daddy kink while reader is in trance, some fluff to help lighten up, and story typical events. Mostly a lot of sad.

A few days have passed. Rather than getting an apartment, I decided to stick around, near Vox. I was still tethered to him and… well, I didn’t really know anyone else. I’d been staying with Vox at the Vees tower, but I slept in my own room. I had my own clothes now, that I bought myself. I started actually going to work with him because I got bored and don’t have much else to do.

My other options were to stay in my room or wander the tower- the latter I was not too keen on, considering I may run into Valentino again and we still hadn’t sorted things out since our last interaction. Also because I kept hearing about a woman named Velvette and she intimidated me. I did not want to risk running into her. So, I stayed with Vox.

Currently, I sat on his lap humming softly as I watched him work. We were in his personal office, a room filled with screens on every wall so he could use his technology-magic-power things effectively. I was watching the news on one monitor while he did his work on another.

Vox glanced up at me as I sat in his lap, a small smile on his face. He was used to me being clingy when he was working, but he didn't mind as long as I didn't distract him too much.

"Enjoying the news?" he asked, returning his attention to the monitor in front of him.

“A snake guy is attacking Princess Morningstars hotel,” I said, watching intently. He shot at a wall, blowing it open. “Oh hey, Alastors there! He’s using his powers too.”

Vox scoffed, rolling his eyes at the mention of Alastor. "Of course he's there," he said, clearly not too fond of the Radio Demon. "He always manages to show up whenever something interesting happens."

“Why is his power just… tentacles?” I asked, confused. He was summoning portals with giant black tentacles shooting out and attacking the snake guy who’d shot at the hotel. “I thought his thing was Radio. What’s the appeal of tentacles anyway? They’re weird.”

Vox chuckled lightly at my confusion. "Yeah, his powers are a bit weird," he admitted. "I don’t think I’ve ever figured him out either. And as for why he chooses tentacles specifically…. I think he just thinks they're freaky and intimidating."

He paused for a moment, then added, "Although… I guess I can’t blame him. Some people might find them appealing." He glanced at me slyly, raising an eyebrow.

“Hm?” I asked, looking at him, genuinely clueless. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

His smirk widened. "Oh, nothing," he said innocently, feigning nonchalance. "Just that some people might find tentacles… intriguing." He leaned closer to me, unable to stop himself from teasing me a little.

“You’re being weird,” I informed him, gently pushing him away.

He chuckled, unbothered by my push. "Me? Being weird? Never," he said with mock offense.

He moved even closer to me again, still wearing that sly grin. "But seriously, you can’t tell me you’ve never found tentacles… intriguing. At least a little bit."

“I don’t get it, like, at all,” I said with a shrug. “What? Do they taste good or something? They look weird to me. I don’t think they’d taste good.”

Vox couldn’t help bursting out laughing at my clueless comment. "Taste good? What, you think they’re a delicacy or something?” he asked, still chuckling.

He shook his head, still smiling widely. "No, no… it’s not about taste, you silly faerie. It’s about the sensation.”

“The sensation?” I asked, giving him a look. I was utterly baffled. “What’s appealing about that? All they’ve got is suction cups.”

He chuckled again, enjoying my bewildered expression. "Ah, you sweet, innocent thing," he said, a sly tone to his voice. "Let me explain it to you, if you’re not too naïve to handle it, that is."

“I’m not naive!” I said immediately.

He smirked again, seeing my immediate rebuttal. "Mmm, you’re right. Maybe ‘innocent’ is a better word to describe you. You’ve got no idea about the kinds of things people here in Hell are into, do you?"

“No.. I came down here to see. That’s the whole point to travel, isn’t it? Learning new things..” I trailed off.

He chuckled, noticing my defensiveness. "Relax, I’m just teasing you," he said, trying to soothe me. "But seriously, you really have no idea about the kinds of things people find appealing in Hell, do you? Even if it’s a little… unconventional."

“Not really…” I admitted quietly. “I seriously have no idea what you mean with the tentacles either.”

He chuckled again, enjoying watching me struggle to understand. "Ah, alright then, let me try to explain it to you."

He paused for a moment, trying to figure out how to articulate it without being too explicit. Finally, he said, "You know how some things feel good when they touch your skin, right? Especially in certain areas?"

“Well yeah, your hands have more nerves, that’s why people reach out to feel things with them. Instead of like, your shoulder or whatever,” I said, not understanding how this tied in to anything. “And you already know my understanding of sensations and textures- like how I don’t like cupcakes because the frosting has a weird texture, and I don’t like touching sand because it’s grainy and gets everywhere.”

He chuckled again, shaking his head. "No, no, that’s not quite what I mean. I’m not talking about textures or surface sensations."

He paused, trying to find the right words. "I’m talking about sensations in places where your skin is extra sensitive, places where you would feel… extra good… if someone touched you."

“Oh,” I said. The tips of my ears turned pink. “Pleasure.”

He smiled at my blushing expression, pleased with himself. "Yes, exactly. And the thing about tentacles... they're designed to be very... flexible and versatile. Which makes them perfect for reaching places that feel really good when touched."

“Oh,” I said again, unsure of how else to respond. I finally understood, yes, but now I was beginning to regret asking.

He chuckled at my flustered reaction, satisfied with finally getting me to understand. "There you go," he said, his smirk widening. "Now you get it. And some people find the idea of that feeling… really appealing."

“Do you?” I asked, peeking at his expression through my hands as I tried to cover my face.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?" he teased. "Let’s just say I don’t have nearly as strong of an aversion to tentacles as you do."

I blinked at him for a moment, covering my face up again. I made a small squeaking noise, then got up.

He chuckled again, thoroughly enjoying watching me get all flustered and embarrassed. "Aww, are you getting all embarrassed on me now? And after I went through all the trouble to explain it to you," he teased.

“I’m going to my room,” I mumbled, still desperately trying to hide my flustered expression.

As I got up, he made an exaggerated pout. "Leaving already? Now, that’s no fun."

“Fun? You’re a sadist, aren’t you?” I asked with a huff, giving him a look.

"Me? A sadist? What makes you think that?" he asked with mock innocence, feigning confusion. "I just enjoy watching you get all flustered and embarrassed. It's cute."

“Yeah, and I’d bet you’d enjoy seeing me get hurt, too,” I said, rolling my eyes. “You certainly do it enough to make it seem that way…” I muttered, under my breath.

He chuckled darkly. "Oh, you have no idea, darling. I do love seeing you squirm a bit. But I don't want to really hurt you. Not badly, anyway." He paused, studying me closely. "Unless you like pain. Do you like pain, little faerie?" he asked with a sly smirk.

“Are you asking if I’m a masochist?” I asked, raising a brow. I walked back over and perched myself on his desk. “Next you’re gonna ask if I like bondage or degradation.”

"Oh, now you’re getting it," he said, pleased with my response. "Well, what’s your answer? I’m curious to know what goes on in that pretty little head of yours.”

“Who says I’ve got anything going on in here?” I asked with a playful grin. “Maybe I’m just as naive and stupid as you think I am.”

He chuckled again, enjoying my playful banter. "Nah, I don’t think you’re stupid or as naive as you pretend to be. You’re smarter than you look, darling. But that doesn’t answer my question. Do you like pain? Do you like being tied up?”

“I like a good adrenaline rush,” I said vaguely, giving him a sly smile.

His smirk widened as he leaned closer to me. "Oh, an adrenaline rush, huh? I think I can give you that."

He suddenly grabbed my wrists and pinned me down on the desk, looming over me. "Like right now, for instance," he said, his voice low and seductive.

My breath hitched and I squeaked, my ears immediately shooting up. I looked at him with big, wide eyes for a moment before breaking into laughter.

He chuckled, amused by my reaction. "What, didn’t expect that, did you?" he said with a smirk.

He kept my wrists pinned to the desk, enjoying having me under him. "You’re cute when you’re caught off guard like this, you know that?"

“I’m sorry- it’s just- it’s so hard to take you seriously sometimes,” I said between laughs. I made a small movement with my wrist and suddenly, we’d switched places. Now I had him pinned beneath me. “I think you look cuter like this than I do when I’m surprised.”

He blinked in surprise, taken aback by my sudden shift in power. He hadn't been expecting me to use my magic to switch our positions. He let out a surprised gasp, then chuckled. "Ah, I see you’ve got some tricks up your sleeve, huh?"

He looked up at me from underneath me, admiring the new position I’d put them in. "Can’t say I don’t like the view," he said with a sly grin.

“Oh- fuck you,” I said, letting go. I huffed and sat in his chair. “You never let me have any fun,” I pouted, crossing my arms. “You always have to ruin it.”

He chuckled as I sat in his chair and pouted. "Oh, come on, you know you liked having me pinned down like that for a minute."

He stood up and walked over to me, leaning against the desk. "And I wasn’t ruining the fun. I was just trying to rile you up a bit. You’re so cute when you’re flustered."

“I’m not-” I was stopped short, unable to finish the sentence. It was a lie. “Fuck,” I muttered.

He smirked as he saw me struggle to finish my sentence. "Oh, you're not what? Flustered? Cute? Unable to finish your sentences, apparently," he teased, watching as I couldn't find the words.

He leaned in a little closer to me, enjoying watching me struggle to keep my composure. "Don't worry, darling. You can admit it. I think it's adorable how easily flustered you get."

“And yet, you refuse to properly ask me out,” I said, looking up at him with a raised brow. “Why is that? You’ll call me cute and adorable all day long but the moment something serious is proposed you backpedal like a madman.”

He chuckled again, realizing I’d caught him in his own little dance. “Ah, so suddenly you want to get serious, huh?”

He leaned back against the desk and crossed his arms, studying me carefully. “You know, if I didn’t know any better, I’d think you actually have feelings for me.”

“I do! What do you think I’ve been doing with you these past few days?” I asked, looking at him incredulously. “I’ve been flirting nonstop! The day we met I showered you in compliments and snuggled up against you!”

He chuckled again, amused by my forwardness. “Alright, alright, you’ve got me there. I can’t pretend I didn’t notice how you’ve been throwing yourself at me these past few days.”

He paused, thinking for a moment. "But let’s be honest, darling. Can you blame me for being a bit hesitant to get serious with you? We’re from two entirely different worlds. You’re a faerie from the Autumnlands, and I’m a sinner demon from Hell."

“He was a punk, I did ballet, what more can I say?” I recited the lyrics to Sk8ter Boy at him lightly. Then smacked him on the wrist. “Opposites attract! We clearly have some chemistry and common interests, anyway. Besides, I’m sure you didn’t become CEO of the most successful business in Hell by waiting things out and being cautious.”

He chuckled again, shaking his head at me reciting lyrics at him. He rubbed his wrist, faking a hurt expression. "Hey, watch the smacking."

He thought for a moment, considering my point. "You’re right, I didn’t get to become CEO by waiting things out. But still, I’m sure you’ve heard the rumors about me. I’ve got a reputation, you know."

“You’re dating Valentino, and considering what he does? I’m surprised your reputation isn’t already ruined,” I said, rolling my eyes. “Look, it doesn’t need to be a public thing or anything. I mean, you make it obvious with your bouts of jealousy and possessiveness the moment I talk to another person, but still, we don’t have to tell anyone that we’re together. It’s none of their business, especially if you’re not comfortable with them knowing. At the end of the day, I don’t give two shits what anyone down here has to say about our relationship except you. This is between me and you. Our comfort and opinion and preference should be the only thing that matters.”

He laughed at my response, admiring my fiery attitude. “Jealousy and possessiveness, huh? You really have picked up on that, haven’t you?”

He thought for a moment, considering my proposal. “You make a fair point. I suppose we don’t necessarily need to make our relationship public knowledge. Our comfort and preferences should be the top priority, you’re right.”

He paused for a moment, studying my face. “Are you sure you’re okay with keeping the relationship private, though? You won’t mind if we have to keep things discreet?”

“Of course I won’t mind,” I said with a grin. “All I do is walk around the tower, stay in my room, or hang out with you. I don’t really interact with anyone, and even if I did, our relationship is none of their business.”

He smiled at my eagerness and confidence. "Alright, darling. If you're sure about it, then I'm on board."

He reached out and gently grabbed my chin, tilting my head up to look at him.

"But just know, darling," he said, his voice low and authoritative. "You're mine now. No one else can have you but me. Got it?"

“Valentino?” I asked, raising a brow since we were technically all dating and in a poly relationship now.

He chuckled and shook his head. "Nah, don’t worry about Valentino. We agreed on a poly arrangement, after all. He knows you’re not exclusively his.”

He stepped closer to me, putting a hand on my waist and pulling me closer.

“No, my dear. I mean you belong to me now. You’re mine, darling. All mine," he said, his voice firm and possessive.

“Okay, yes, but wouldn’t I ‘belong’ to Valentino too? He’s dating you and me, you’re dating me and him, and I’m dating you and him. It’s all mutual, isn’t it?” I asked, with a small smile. I didn’t quite understand why he was being so possessive.

He chuckled again, amused by my question. "Yes, darling, technically you belong to Valentino, too. But I’m not talking about the poly arrangement right now. I’m talking about how you belong to me."

He leaned in closer, his grip on my waist tightening.

"When I say you belong to me, I mean that I get jealous when you pay attention to anyone else. I want your attention focused on me, and only me. Understand?”

“That doesn’t seem healthy,” I noted, giving him a look. “I don’t think that’s fair. You talk to plenty of people all the time and I don’t get jealous or possessive.”

He sighed in frustration, realizing I had a point. "I know, I know. It’s not healthy, and it’s not fair. But darling, you have to understand, you bring something out in me that I didn’t know I had. Something possessive and jealous. I don’t want to share you. Not even with Valentino, who I’m dating as well."

He paused, trying to find the right words to explain himself. "Don’t you understand, darling? You’re mine. I don’t want anyone else taking your attention away from me.”

“You just keep repeating that but I don’t think you understand,” I said, my tone taking on a more serious edge. I gave him a hard look. “You don’t own me or my soul or anything. My attention and focus isn’t yours to give and take and distribute as you please simply because I like you.”

“In terms of general power? You’re an overlord, of course you could kill me in an instant if you wished, but I think you’re forgetting…” I paused, making the red string appear around my finger and attach to his. I flicked my wrist and it wrapped around his entire body and turned into chains instead. “… you gave me your name. If anything, I’m the one that owns you, Vincent Sterling.”

His eyes went wide in surprise and shock as the red string appeared and wrapped around him, turning into chains that held him in place. He tried to move, but found he was completely immobilized.

He stared at me in disbelief. "You... You used my name against me? That’s cheating, darling," he said, struggling against the chains.

He tried to keep his cool, but there was a hint of fear and vulnerability in his tone. He was completely at my mercy, held captive by my magic.

“This is Hell, and you’ve hardly been playing fair yourself,” I said, quieter. I tightened the chains slightly and tilted his face to look at me. “You are going to let me talk to whomever I please. You can be jealous all you want but I sure as hell am not going to let it interfere with my life. You do not own me, Vincent, and at the rate we’re going? You hardly ever will. You want to be possessive? Channel it towards something useful. Use it to protect me when I need it. Prove I can trust you, prove I don’t have to worry about you going overboard. That is an order.”

His face was inches away from mind, held in place by the chains around him. He looked into my eyes, seeing the determination and fire within them. He knew he couldn't argue with me any further.

He gritted his teeth, struggling to keep his pride intact despite his vulnerable position. After a moment, he relented and nodded his head.

"Okay, okay. You've made your point loud and clear, darling. I'll work on my possessiveness. You have my word."

The chains slowly retracted, releasing him from their hold.

He took a deep breath, still trying to process the situation. "You really know how to keep me in check. Remind me never to underestimate you again."

He ran a hand through his antennae, trying to regain some composure. "You're right. I need to channel this possessiveness into something useful, not just let it consume me. I'll work on it, I promise."

He paused, studying my face. "But you have to agree, using my name against me like that was a bit unfair."

“I don’t have to agree to anything,” I said stiffly, stepping away from him. “Stop doing that,” I mumbled, when he called me darling again.

He raised a brow at my sudden change in tone. He hadn't expected me to react so strongly to the pet name.

He took a step towards me, holding up his hands in surrender. "Okay, okay. No more 'darling' then. Sorry, I didn't realize it bothered you so much."

He paused, studying my expression. "Are you that upset about me calling you darling? Or is it something else?"

“Just… on edge, lately,” I said, quieter. Softer. My ears drooped a little. “Sorry.” I wouldn’t admit it, but I preferred when he called me princess.

He saw my ears droop and noticed the soft tone of my voice. His expression softened, realizing that something was bothering me.

He stepped closer to me, his voice quieter and softer. "Hey, it’s okay. I understand. I know things have been hectic lately."

He reached out to lift my chin, gently tilting my head up to look at him. "You don’t have to apologize for being on edge, princess."

“Yes I do,” I said, holding myself tightly. “You don’t get it.”

He saw the tension in my body language, the way I was holding myself tightly. He could sense that something was really bothering me.

He stepped closer, wrapping his arms around me in a gentle embrace. "Hey. Talk to me, princess. What’s really bothering you? I want to understand."

“I… I don’t-” I bit my lip and made a frustrated noise. I couldn’t say ‘I don’t know’ because it’d be a lie. I sighed. “I guess… I’m just homesick.”

I paused, then buried my head in my hands. “God- fuck- that sounds so stupid, doesn’t it? All of you are trapped down here forever and I’m the one complaining about being homesick….”

He held me tighter, his arms wrapping around me in a comforting embrace. He listened quietly as I spoke, noticing the frustration in my voice.

As I admitted to being homesick, he gave me a gentle squeeze. "Hey, hey. It's not stupid. You're allowed to feel homesick, even if we're stuck down here permanently. Don't compare your feelings to ours, princess. It's not fair."

“Mmmn… why do you have to be so reasonable?” I asked with a groan.

He chuckled softly, wrapping his arms around me as I settled into his lap. He gently ran a hand through my hair. "I try my best, princess."

I climbed into his lap and pressed my head against his chest. “How long has it been, since you’ve seen the stars? Do you miss it? Being on earth, at home…”

He paused for a moment, thinking. "It's been... a really long time since I've seen the stars. Decades, maybe a century. I don't really remember anymore. As for missing earth... I'm not sure. I've been down here so long, it's become my home now."

“Do you… do you like it here?” I asked softly, looking up at him. “I know it’s not great but… that doesn’t mean it’s all bad, right?”

He looked down at me, his expression softening. He paused for a moment, contemplating my question.

"Well... I suppose it's not all bad," he said slowly. "Down here, I have some amount of freedom to do whatever I want. I don't have to worry about the moral constraints on earth. I have power, wealth, and influence. So, in that sense, I guess you could say I like it here."

“Do you…” I paused and took a deep breath. “Do you like me being here? I know I can be a pain in the ass and… I dunno, I just…” I sighed, my wings fluttering a bit as I buried my head against his chest, muffling my voice. “I worry, sometimes.”

He paused, surprised by my vulnerability. He wrapped his arms around me tighter, gently rubbing my back. "Of course I like you being here, princess," he said softly. "You're not a pain in the ass. Well, you can be sometimes, but it's endearing." He chuckled lightly, trying to lighten the mood. "And why do you worry, princess? You know I'd never let anything happen to you."

“Feelings aren’t always rational,” I mumbled. “Like your possessiveness and jealousy.”

He chuckled again, realizing I had a point. "Touché, princess. You got me there."

He paused, continuing to run his hand along my back in a soothing motion. "But seriously, princess, you don't have to worry about me. I promise I'll never let anything happen to you. I may get a bit possessive and jealous sometimes, but I'd never hurt you. You know that, right?"

I tensed and looked away from him. I didn’t reply. Instead, I bit my lip and took in the silence that followed.

He knew immediately that something was off. He tilted my chin up, gently forcing me to look at him. "Hey," he said softly. "What's going on, princess? Why'd you go quiet all of a sudden?"

“It’s just- I can’t… I don’t-” I struggled for words, tears pricking my eyes. There was a stupid tightness in my throat and- I didn’t even notice I was shaking. “I can never figure you out.”

Something seemed to be eating at me. He pulled me closer, wrapping his arms around me in a protective embrace. He tried to keep his voice gentle and soothing.

"Hey, hey. Slow down, princess. Take a deep breath and tell me what's on your mind. I'm listening," he said, his hand rubbing soothing circles on my back.

“No you aren’t! You never listen, you never- you never care!” I yelled, desperately trying to wipe away the tears streaming down my face. “All you do is tease and mock me. How am I supposed to know whether or not you’d actually- you’d actually hurt me?”

He was taken aback by my sudden outburst, shocked by the tears streaming down my face. He took a deep breath, trying to keep his own emotions in check.

"You really think I don't care about you? Princess, I'm trying here. I'm trying to be better. I don't just tease and mock you, I-" He paused, a flicker of hurt passing over his face. "You really think I'd hurt you? Is that how little you think of me?"

“I don’t know! I don’t- I don’t know anything when it comes to you,” I sobbed, pulling away from him. I could never figure him out. “The teasing, mocking, condescension, the possessiveness and jealousy… how the fuck am I supposed to keep up with this game of hot and cold? One minute you’re making fun of me for not knowing about tentacle kinks and the next you’re asking what I’m into!”

He frowned, his expression conflicted. He hated seeing me cry, hearing the hurt in my voice. His heart ached.

"That's... that's not a game, princess. That's just... me being me. I can't help how I am. Some days I tease and mock because I think it's funny. Some days I'm possessive and jealous because I can't stand the thought of anyone else having your attention. Some days I just... want to know you better."

He paused, taking a deep breath.

"It's not a game. It's just... me."

“It not just between days, Vincent! It’s between minutes- even seconds! How do I know you won’t kill me at any given moment?” I asked, looking at him desperately. “How do I know you aren’t manipulating me to get what you want? How do I know you care? How can I tell what’s true when you’re always lying? Prove to me I can trust you!” I broke off, my breathing ragged. “Prove to me- prove I can trust you. please… please I just- I just want to be able to trust you. I’m tired of being afraid.”

The hurt and desperation in my voice was like a physical blow. He could see the pleading in my eyes, the pain on my face. He'd pushed me too far. Once again. As always.

He took a deep breath, trying to keep his own emotions in check. "Princess, I-"

But he couldn't find the words. He wanted to prove it to me. He wanted to tell me I could trust him. But he knew he couldn't just say it and expect me to believe him. He had to show me.

"Can... can I touch you?"

I looked at him, my eyes wide and watery. I blinked and looked away, shaking my head. “Just… just forget it,” I mumbled, wiping my tears away. “Just use your hypnosis and… and make me forget this ever happened.”

He froze, his heart clenching in his chest. He hadn't expected me to ask that. To ask him to hypnotize me, to make me forget their conversation. He felt a pang of hurt and disappointment, but tried to keep it hidden. He slowly reached out and gently turned my face back towards him.

"No, princess. I don't want to hypnotize you. I want you to remember this."

“You had no problem hypnotizing me three days ago to make me call you Daddy,” I snapped, pulling away from him again. I glared. I didn’t want to be touched right now. “Don’t touch me and- and cut the crap. Stop with the double fucking standards. I’m tired of it. I’m just- I’m so fucking tired of it.”

He drew back, stung by my harsh words and the venom in my voice. He tried to keep his own anger in check, though it was a struggle. "That's different. That was just a joke. This... this is different," he said, his voice tight.

He paused, searching for the words to explain himself. "Princess, when I do those sorts of things... it's just jokes. I'm not... I don't mean to hurt you. I don't want to manipulate you."

“A joke?” I asked incredulously. I looked at him, reassessing, wishing he’d say he didn’t mean it. He didn’t. “You honestly- you think that hypnotizing me when I’m half dressed and not expecting it… teasing me and playing with my feelings, touching me in ways you shouldn’t, taking advantage of the fact I was hypnotized… making me call you daddy… you think that’s a joke?”

His heart sank as I spoke, each word like a knife to the gut.

I sighed and gave him a bitter smile and laugh, pushing right past him, shaking my head. “I don’t know why I expected anything better from you, Vox.”

He hadn't realized the extent of what he'd done. He hadn't fully understood the impact his actions had on me. He'd just seen it as harmless flirtation, a way to mess with me. But to hear me say those things, to see the hurt and anger in my eyes, it was like a bucket of cold water to the face.

He reached out, grabbing my arm, his grip tight. "Hey. Don't walk away. Princess, let me explain-"

“I don’t want to hear your stupid excuses,” I spat, trying to pull away. I was unsuccessful. He was too strong. I glared instead.

His fingers dug into my arm, keeping me in place. He refused to let me go. Not until he'd had his say. "They're not excuses, princess," he snapped back, his voice tight. "They're explanations."

He took a deep breath, trying to calm his frustration and irritation. "You don't understand. I didn't-" He stopped himself, biting back his words. This wasn't going the way he wanted. He needed to fix this.

“I don’t care,” I said coldly.

He cursed under his breath, frustrated by my icy demeanor. He knew me well enough to know that I could be stubborn to a fault. He knew that I wasn't going to listen to a word he said until I calmed down.

And the only way to calm me down was to-

He stopped that train of thought. No. He wasn't going to use hypnosis. Not this time. He took a deep breath, trying to quell his own irritation. "Princess, please..." he started, his voice strained.

“No,” I said, turning away from him. “We’re done here. I’m done.”

My words hit him like a slap in the face. Done. Done with this conversation. Done with him. He felt a pang in his chest. He didn't want that. He didn't want me to be done.

His grip on my arm tightened almost involuntarily, his fingers digging into my skin. "No. We're not done. I'm not done," he said firmly, a hint of desperation creeping into his voice. "Damn it, princess, I'm trying here. I-" He sighed, his shoulders slumping in frustration. He knew that fighting with me wasn't getting him anywhere.

He took a deep breath, trying to steady himself.

"Please," he said, his voice softer now. "Please, just... listen to me. Let me explain."

“I can’t,” I said, quieter, still refusing to look at him. “I can’t right now. I just- I need some time.”

The pause, the hesitation… how I’d faltered. I was going to tell a lie, but couldn’t, so I’d sidestepped. I reworded it, but I hadn’t meant what I said, I wasn’t going to…

His heart sank even further as he heard the hesitation in my voice. He could hear the strain, the struggle to say the words.

"Time," he repeated, feeling a hollow ache inside. "You need time. What does that mean? What are you going to do in that time?"

He wasn't sure he wanted the answer.

He was acutely aware of my body, the way I was holding myself, the tension in my muscles that matched his own. He knew me well enough to know that I was on the edge of either tears or anger. Maybe both.

He swallowed, forcing himself to speak again.

"Princess... I-"

He stopped, his words catching in his throat. He wasn't sure what to say. He wanted to say so many things, but he didn't know where to start.

“Please,” I whispered. I looked almost fragile. “Just make me forget.”

He froze, stunned by my whisper. Forget? I wanted him to hypnotize me, to make me forget everything that had just happened.

His heart ached at the request. He didn't want me to forget. He wanted me to understand, to see things from his point of view. But he couldn't refuse me. He couldn't deny me that request.

He closed his eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath. When he opened them again, they were filled with a resigned sadness.

"Are you sure, princess?" he asked quietly.

I opened my mouth to speak but ended up nodding instead.

He let out a shaky breath, his heart heavy with something that felt a lot like despair. He slowly raised his hand to my face, gently tipping my chin up so that I was looking at him.

"Look at me, princess," he said quietly, his voice firm. "Look at me and only me. Focus on the sound of my voice."

“Your voice,” I repeated quietly, voice shaky.

He watched me as I repeated his words, my voice quivering with a mix of emotions. He gently stroked my cheek with his thumb, trying to soothe me.

"That's right," he said softly. "Just listen to my voice. Ignore everything else. Ignore your thoughts, your emotions... just focus on me. On my voice."

I nodded and followed along.

He smiled slightly, feeling a pang of guilt at how easily I obeyed him. He knew he should feel elated, knowing that his power over me was so absolute. But instead, he just felt a sense of emptiness.

"Good girl," he murmured, using the praise to reinforce my obedience. "Just… keep listening to me. Listen to my voice and relax. Let everything else slip away, princess. Just listen to me and let yourself drift."

He watched as my eyes went hazy, the hint of resistance disappearing. It was hard to see me like this- so vulnerable, so submissive. He wanted to pull me into his chest and hold me tight, to tell me it would all be okay. To apologize, to make me understand.

But he couldn't. Not yet.

"That's it," he continued, his voice soft and slow. "Just relax. Just listen. Just let yourself sink deeper into the soothing sound of my voice. Let it drown out everything else. Let it fill your mind and your body."

He took a step closer, closing the distance between us. He could feel the heat radiating from my body, the tension in my muscles beginning to loosen.

"You're doing so well, princess," he whispered, his voice a low, soothing rumble. "Just keep listening. Just keep drifting. Just let yourself go completely. Give in to the sweet feeling of surrender."

He gently pushed me back until I was pressed against the wall, his body trapping me in place. He wanted to be close to me, to feel me against him as he worked to hypnotize me.

"Just sink deeper for me, princess," he murmured, his breath hot against my skin. "Let yourself go even further. Let yourself fall under my control. Let my voice become the only thing that matters.”

“Your control…” I mumbled, my eyes glazed over. “You’re all that matters.”

"That's right," he whispered, his voice barely above a murmur. "I'm all that matters. You're under my control now. You're completely at my mercy. And you like it, don't you?"

“Yes, daddy,” I said quietly. the last time he had me in trance he’d ordered me to call him daddy. Apparently it’d carried over.

He froze, his breath catching in his throat at the sound of the word. "Daddy." Hearing me call him that again sent a jolt of heat through his body, stirring something deep within him.

But he tried to ignore it, tried to push aside the way it made him feel. He couldn't let himself get distracted by his own desires. He had to stay focused on the task at hand.

"That's a good girl," he said, his voice rough with suppressed emotion. "You know what it means when you call me 'daddy,' don't you?"

“I love you,” I said, my voice cracking slightly. I looked up at him- I was shaking slightly, slipping out of trance. His words sent a jolt of pleasure through me, but I ignored it, tugging on his sleeve instead. “I’m sorry.”

His eyes widened at my words, the pleading in my voice tugging at his heart. He reached up to cup my face, his fingers tracing my cheek.

"Sshh, princess, shhh," he said softly, stroking my face gently. "Don't apologize. You don't have anything to apologize for." He could feel me slipping out of trance, my grip on his sleeve becoming tighter. He knew he had to bring me back under.

"Close your eyes," he instructed, his voice firmer now. "Just close your eyes and let yourself relax." He watched as I obeyed, my eyes fluttering shut. He took a deep breath, his own heart racing in his chest.

"Good girl," he said quietly. "Now, just listen to my voice. Focus on my voice and only my voice. Let everything else fade away. Don't think, don't feel, just listen. Can you do that, princess?"

“Mhm,” I mumbled softly.

"Good girl," he repeated, his voice a low murmur. "Just keep listening and keep relaxing. You're doing so well. You're being such a good girl for me, princess."

He took another step closer to me, pressing his body against mine. He could feel the heat radiating off me, feel the tremors that ran through my body.

"Now," he continued, his voice dropping even lower. "I'm going to count down from ten. With each number, you'll feel yourself slipping deeper into trance. And when I reach zero, you'll be completely under my control."

He paused, his fingers resuming their gentle stroking of my cheek. "Are you ready, princess?"

“Yes, daddy,” I said quietly, leaning against him, relishing in his touch.

He took a shaky breath, his heart aching at the way I leaned into him. He wanted to pull me into his arms and hold me, to tell me everything would be okay. But he couldn't. Not yet.

"That's a good girl," he murmured, his voice betraying his own emotions. "Now, take a deep breath and let yourself count down with me."

"10...9...8..."

He paused, watching me closely.

"7...6...5..."

He watched me as I counted with him, my eyes still shut, my body leaned against his. He could feel the tension slowly slipping away as I allowed myself to fall deeper and deeper into trance.

"4...3...2..."

He paused for a moment, listening to the sound of my breathing. It was slow and steady, a nice, rhythmic in-and-out.

"1...and zero."

I was completely under his control now.

He let out a shaky breath, feeling a mixture of guilt and satisfaction. He knew that he should feel guilty, taking advantage of me like this. But he couldn't help the sense of satisfaction that came with knowing that I was completely under his power.

"Can you hear me, princess?" he whispered, his voice low and soft. "Can you hear my voice?"

“Yes,” I said softly.

He smiled slightly at my response. my voice was always so sweet and submissive when I was in trance. It was a stark contrast to my usual stubbornness and independence.

"That's good," he said, his voice still quiet. "You're doing so well. You're being such a good girl, letting yourself sink into this blissful feeling of submission."

He gently cupped my face again, his fingers tracing my jawline. he sighed, knowing he’d have to refocus on his task… I’d trusted him to put me into trance for an exact reason, I’d trusted him to do it, knowing full well I’d be completely helpless and unable to stop him if he decided to do something else.

"Now, princess," he said, his tone gentle but firm. "I'm going to ask you a question, and I want you to answer me honestly. Do you remember what we were talking about before I put you into trance?"

“It’s fuzzy,” I replied, sounding unsure of myself.

He nodded, a hint of satisfaction in his eyes.

"That's alright, princess," he said soothingly. "I expected as much. You were very tense and conflicted before I put you under. It's natural that you can't remember everything we talked about. But I want you to try. Can you do that for me? Can you try to remember what we were talking about?"

I tensed a little. “I don’t… want to…” I mumbled quietly.

He paused at my words, noticing the tension in my body.

"Why not, princess?" he asked gently, his fingers still tracing my jawline. He could feel my reluctance, my uncertainty.

"Why don't you want to remember?"

“I’m sorry,” I said, looking up at him- my eyes were still unfocused, but I was being honest. I felt bad about it, for hurting him.

He shook his head, his expression softening.

"It's alright, princess," he said quietly. "You don't need to be sorry. I understand. You're in trance right now, and you feel safe. You don't want to remember anything that might shake that feeling. But trust me, princess, I'm trying to help you. I'm trying to make it better."

“Better,” I repeated with a small nod. I relaxed again.

"That's right," he said, his voice gentle and reassuring. "I'm going to help you make everything feel better. But to do that, I need you to trust me. I need you to be honest with me. Can you do that, princess? Can you trust me to make it better for you?"

“I trust you,” I said softly.

He smiled at that, his heart swelling with affection. I was so earnest and sincere in trance, so honest and innocent. It tugged at his heart strings.

"Good girl," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "That's my good girl. I can't tell you how happy that makes me, princess."

“I like being your good girl, daddy,” I said with a small smile.

His breath caught in his chest at my words, his heart fluttering in his chest. He was always taken off guard by how vulnerable and open I was when I was in trance. It was like I was a completely different person.

"And I love hearing you call me daddy," he said quietly, his fingers tracing my jawline again.

He paused for a moment, watching me intently.

"I'm going to ask you another question, princess," he said softly. "And I want you to answer me just as honestly as you did before. Can you do that for me?"

“Mhm,” I said with a nod.

He smiled at my response, his heart skipping a beat.

"That's my good girl," he said, his tone approving. "You're doing so well."

He paused for another moment before continuing.

"Princess," he began, his voice still soft. "Do you remember what we were talking about earlier, before I put you into trance?"

“Yes,” I said, quieter.

He noticed immediately my shift in tone, the slight hesitation in my voice.

"Can you tell me, princess?" he asked gently, his fingers drifting down from my jawline to my chin. He tilted my face up, forcing me to meet his gaze.

“We were arguing,” I said, tensing a little. “I was upset… yelling at you… and I asked you to do this, to make me forget.”

He nodded, a pang of guilt twisting in his stomach. He’d tried to forget that part- the part where I’d been angry, the part where I’d been arguing with him and telling him to take it back.

“That’s right, princess,” he said quietly. “And why did you ask me to do this?”

“Because…” I paused, trying to find the right words. “I was hurt but… I felt bad that I hurt you. I was sorry but didn’t know how to say it… I wanted to listen and understand but I couldn’t and I felt bad…” I hesitated, making a small squeak noise. “I don’t want to hurt you, I don’t want to upset you.”

He was taken aback by my confession, my words hitting him deeply. He didn’t like to see me this emotional, this vulnerable.

“Oh, princess…” he said softly, his heart clenching in his chest. “You don’t have to feel bad. It was my fault, I’m the one who-” he trailed off, taking a deep breath.

“It doesn’t matter,” he continued, his voice firm. “You’re in trance now. You don’t have to think about any of that.”

“Mm… I don’t have to think?” I asked, with a soft innocent smile.

He chuckled softly at my response, his heart melting at the way I smiled. I looked so sweet and innocent when I was in trance. It was almost intoxicating.

“That’s right, princess,” he said, his voice low and soothing. “You don’t have to think about anything. Just listen to my voice and relax. Let all your worries fade away. Let yourself sink even deeper into this blissful feeling of submission.”

“Submission…” I repeated, doing as I was told.

He watched me closely, a small, satisfied smile on his face.

“Yes, princess, submission,” he said quietly. “You like that word, don’t you? You like feeling helpless and submissive. You like letting yourself be controlled, letting me take care of you.”

“Mindless,” I said, vaguely remembering how good the word made me feel the last time he said it when I was in trance.

His breath caught in his chest at my use of the word ‘mindless’. He remembered how much I enjoyed that word, too.

“That’s right, princess,” he said, his voice dropping an octave. “You like feeling mindless for me. You like letting yourself go, letting your mind go blank and empty. You like just following my words and my commands.”

He reached out and gently took my face in his hands, his thumbs gently stroking my cheeks.

“You look so peaceful like this, princess. So trusting and obedient. It’s almost hard to believe that you were so angry earlier. You’re so different when you’re in trance, so submissive and compliant.”

“I don’t want to be angry,” I said softly.

He smiled at my words, feeling both guilt and affection for me.

“I know you don’t,” he said quietly. “And that’s why you’re in trance right now, princess. You didn’t know how else to express that to me. So you asked me to put you under, so you could feel peaceful and compliant instead of angry.”

“You’re so nice..” I mumbled, nuzzling up against him.

He chuckled softly, his heart swelling at my words. He had to resist the urge to pull me into his arms and hold me close. But he couldn’t break the trance- it was too important to keep me under.

“Thank you, princess,” he said, his voice taking on a gentle tone. “But you’re the one who’s nice. You’re the one who trusts me enough to let me put you in this trance, to make you feel peaceful and mindless.”

He paused, taking a moment to savor the peaceful look on my face. It was so unlike my usual stubborn, independent self. I was always so in control, so defiant. But in trance, I was completely helpless, completely at his mercy.

“You’re being such a good girl, princess,” he said quietly. “You’re being so obedient and mindless. Do you want to know what good girls get?”

“Hm?” I asked, looking up at him curiously.

He chuckled softly at my inquisitive expression. He loved how innocent and eager I was in trance, how keen I was to please. “Good girls get rewards, princess,” he said quietly. “And I have a special reward for you, if you’re willing to listen.”

“Okay,” i said with a smile and nod.

He smiled back at me, his heart warming at my eagerness.

“That’s my good girl,” he said gently. “Now, here’s what I want you to do, princess. I want you to close your eyes. Can you do that for me?”

“Mhm!” I said, doing just that.

“Good girl,” he said, his voice soft and soothing. “That’s my good girl. Now I want you to imagine a safe space, a place where you feel completely calm and relaxed. Can you do that for me?”

“Yes, daddy.” I imagined it, extra vivid and clear. It was the outskirts of the Autumnlands… the orange leaves falling off the oak trees, the cool breeze.

He watched me closely, admiring the way my face relaxed as I imagined my safe space.

“That’s it, princess,” he said quietly. “You’re doing so well. I can see how calm and relaxed you are already. Now I want you to imagine something else in your safe space. Can you do that for me?”

“Mm,” I mumbled my agreement, taking a deep breath and doing as he’d commanded. I added a pond in the spot I’d imagined, and imagined the smell and sound of the water… it made my mind feel even more relaxed and calm.

He smiled at my obedience, pleased with the way I’d added more detail to my safe space. He knew he could take this further.

“Good girl,” he said quietly. “You’re doing so well, princess. You’re being such a good girl for me. Now, I want you to imagine something else in your safe space. A hammock, perhaps, or a blanket, something comfortable.”

Immediately, I added a hammock into the vision I had, the soft feeling and the way it swayed in the breeze.

“Excellent,” he said, his voice warm and approving. “You’re such a good girl, princess. You’re doing exactly as I say. Now, I want you to imagine yourself in your safe space. I want you to imagine yourself sitting in that hammock… or lying down in it, relaxing and letting all the tension drain away from your body.”

I visibly relaxed even further, if that was possible. I began to slump and fall over, leaning against him for support, entirely dependent on him to hold me up.

He chuckled softly at my relaxed state, his heart melting at the way I leaned into him, trusting him completely to hold me up.

He reached out and gently pulled me into his lap, wrapping his arms around me and holding me close. “Good girl…” he said quietly, his voice a low murmur. “Such a good, mindless, obedient girl…”

he felt a certain sadness creep in, realizing he’d have to get to the part where he makes me forget our earlier conversation. he didn’t want to… I was so much calmer now. maybe if he woke me from trance I’d be more willing to listen? then he wouldn’t have to erase my memory at all.

He hesitated, his heart torn between continuing with the trance and waking me up. On one hand, he loved how calm and obedient I was in trance, how completely compliant and unresistant I was. But… he’d never…

He took a deep breath, his grip on me tightening slightly.

“Princess…” he said quietly. "Can you hear me?"

“Yes daddy,” I said softly, a happy little smile on my face.

He paused, looking down at my innocent expression. I was completely under his control right now. I was trusting and compliant in a way I never was normally.

He took a deep breath, steeling himself for what he was going to say next.

“I need you to listen to me very carefully, princess,” he said quietly. “Do you remember why I put you in this trance?”

“No daddy, you told me not to think,” I said, in the same lighthearted tone as before.

He couldn’t help but smile at my response, even though it was difficult. He loved how cheerful and light I was under the trance.

“That’s right, I did,” he said quietly. “But I need you to think for just a moment, princess. Can you do that for me?”

“Mhm,” I said with a nod.

He smiled, relieved that I was willing to cooperate.

“Good girl,” he said quietly. “Now princess, I need you to think back to the last thing you remember before I put you in this trance. Can you do that for me?”

“Yeah,” I said, already searching my memory. It had hard to think… so much easier to be mindless. Eventually I found what I was looking for. “I asked you to make me forget.”

He nodded, a pang of guilt twisting his stomach. That was what he’d hoped I wouldn’t remember.

“That’s right, princess,” he said quietly. “You asked me to make you forget. Do you remember what we were arguing about before that point?”

“Not really… it’s hard to think,” I mumbled. “I feel bad. I think I upset you. I was sorry… I am sorry.”

He felt his heart clench at my words, his guilt growing stronger. He hated that I was so remorseful when I was under trance. He loved my stubbornness and feistiness when I was awake, but it broke his heart to hear me so regretful and obedient in a trance.

“It’s alright, princess,” he said quietly. “I know you’re sorry, I know you didn’t mean to upset me. But I need to ask you something, okay?”

“Mhm,” I mumbled with a nod, my head falling against his chest.

“Princess,” he began quietly. “Do you remember why we were arguing earlier?” He held his breath, bracing himself for my response.

“Not really,” I mumbled. I thought harder, trying to dig into my memory. “I think we were talking… I was upset about something, and you said I was too stubborn?”

He chuckled softly, bittersweetly at my words. “That’s right, princess,” he said quietly, his grip on me tightening slightly. “You were upset about something, and you were being too stubborn to listen to me.”

He paused, his heart heavy with guilt. He knew what he had to say next.

"But princess, there was something else, too," he continued quietly. "It wasn't just your stubbornness. You were angry, and you were rude. You said things you shouldn't have said."

He paused again, bracing himself for my reaction.

“I know,” I said quietly.

He felt his heart twist at my soft words. I was so different like this, so cooperative and apologetic. “You know?” he repeated quietly. “You remember what you said to me?”

“I know I shouldn’t have… I…” I struggled for words, my emotions conflicting with the trance he had me in. I felt strongly about this, and it was disrupting the trance state. “Daddy…” I whined, pressing myself against him. “Please… I… I’m sorry… I want to listen…”

He felt his heart ache at my pitiful whine, my voice becoming more emotional. He knew the trance was starting to wear off, that I was starting to come back to myself.

“Shhh…” he said quietly, gently rubbing my back. “It’s okay, princess. I know you’re sorry… I know you want to listen. But I need to ask you something else… and I need you to tell me the truth, okay?”

“Mhm,” I mumbled, my eyes squeezed shut. I still felt very floaty and relaxed and calm, but I also felt the emotional turmoil starting to rise up. I was still very dependent on him, but I could feel my own thoughts beginning to resurface, slowly but surely.

He took a deep breath, feeling my emotional turmoil, sensing that I was starting to come back to myself.

“Princess,” he said quietly. “Do you remember what I said right before I put you in trance?”

“No,” I said.

He nodded, a pang of guilt twisting his stomach.

“That’s fine, princess,” he said quietly. “I’ll remind you. Before I put you in trance, I told you that this wasn’t a permanent solution, that we’d have to have the same conversation again when you woke up. Do you remember that?”

“No,” I said, quieter. I made a small noise, my ears twitching lightly as I slipped further out of trance.

He felt me slip further out of the trance, my movements getting less automatic. It was bittersweet for him.

“That’s okay, princess,” he said quietly. “It’s only natural that you don’t remember. You were in too deep for long enough that the details would fade. But I remember, and I need to ask you something before the trance fades completely, okay?”

I nodded, my eyes still squeezed shut as I was gently pulled out of the trance. My body still felt floaty and relaxed, but my mind was starting to wake up, too. I still had some mental dependence on him, and I was still in his lap, but I was coming back to myself more and more.

“Yes, daddy,” I mumbled.

He felt me waking up, he could also see the pain in my expression, the emotions starting to resurface now that I was coming out of the trance.

He took a deep breath, steeling himself. He knew what he had to ask me, but he hated the idea of it. “Princess,” he said quietly. "Before the trance goes away completely, I need to ask you something."

“I know, you just said that,” I mumbled, tensing. I relaxed for a moment again after that.

He chuckled quietly at my response, feeling the tension in my body. He knew I was starting to come back to myself, starting to remember their earlier argument and the things I had said to him.

"I know I said that, princess," he said quietly. “But I need you to listen carefully to what I’m about to ask next. Can you do that?”

“Yes!” I said quickly. “Hurry up.” There was a soft urgency to my voice.

He smiled softly at my reply, hearing the urgency in my voice. He knew his time was running thin, and mine was too, but he needed me to answer his question, to be honest with him.

“Alright, princess, here it goes,” he began quietly. “Before I put you under hypnosis. You said some very hurtful things to me, didn’t you?”

“Yes.”

He nodded, taking a deep breath before asking the next question.

He hated the look on my face, the pain in my expression as I slowly remembered how I’d lashed out at him, how I’d been so rude and disrespectful.

“And when I told you I was going to put you under hypnosis so we could have an honest conversation, you agreed, didn’t you?” he asked me gently.

“I…” I faltered, my gaze refocusing. “…Vox?” I asked, squinting up at him.

He smiled softly down at me, feeling me starting to come back to myself. He gently held my chin in his hand, lifting my face up to his.

“Yes, princess?” he said quietly. “Are you with me again?”

“Yeah,” I said with a nod. “Yeah…” I rested my head against his chest, trying to get a hold of myself and process. “Give me a moment.”

He held me closely, his arms wrapping around me as I rested my head against his chest.

“Take your time, princess,” he said gently. “I’m right here.”

I paused for a moment, irritation rising as I remembered what he’d done with me when I was in trance. “Daddy,” I muttered with clear contempt. I shook my head and pushed it aside for now, focusing on the argument from before. “I’m sorry, Vox.”

He felt his heart sink as my irritation became apparent, my voice laced with frustration. He knew that I was remembering what he’d done when I was hypnotized, and he knew I wasn’t happy about it.

“It’s alright, princess,” he said quietly, rubbing my back gently. “Don’t focus on that right now. Let’s talk about the argument, okay?”

“I’m sorry about that,” I clarified, quieter. “I should’ve listened. I should’ve waited for your explanation. I’m sorry.”

He felt his heart start to soften as I apologized, my words quiet and genuine. He smiled gently at me, gently running his fingers through my hair.

“I know you’re sorry, princess,” he said gently. “And I appreciate that. Do you know why I hypnotized you instead of continuing the argument?”

“Because I asked you to do that and make me forget?” I asked, raising a brow.

He chuckled softly, shaking his head.

“Partly, yes,” he said gently. “But that’s not the main reason, princess. Do you remember how heated you were during the argument?”

“…you lied,” I realized with a smile. “You weren’t gonna make me forget! You were just calming me down so you could talk to me properly.”

He smiled softly as I figured it out, shaking his head in amusement. “That’s right, princess,” he said gently. “I wasn’t going to make you forget. I knew you needed to calm down before we could have a reasonable, productive conversation. And hypnosis was the best way to do that.”

“Besides killing me,” I said on impulse.

He chuckled dryly at my response, his grip on me tightening slightly. “Well, yes, that would’ve made you calm, too,” he said dryly. “But I prefer hypnosis over killing you. I kinda like you alive, princess.”

“Sorry! Sorry,” I said, realizing what I’d said. “Intrusive thought. Didn’t mean to say it.”

He chuckled softly, gently patting my back. “It’s alright,” he said kindly. “I know it was just an intrusive thought. I know you didn’t mean it.” He paused, his expression more serious now.

“But that’s exactly why I put you under hypnosis,” he said quietly. “You were so heated and defensive during our argument. I knew that we wouldn’t be able to have a reasonable conversation until you calmed down. And hypnosis was the fastest, easiest way to accomplish that. Do you understand, princess?”

“Yeah,” I said, nodding along. Now I had a sort of dread in my stomach at the thought of reassessing the issue in depth. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, princess,” he said kindly. “Now let’s continue with our conversation, alright? We need to talk about what happened, and we need to talk about it calmly.”

“Right, calmly,” I said, trying to gather myself and push my nervousness away. I’d apologized, I wanted to be done with it. I knew I was in the wrong but… I still didn’t understand, and it’d be unfair of me to expect him to drop the topic. He deserved to be heard, explanation and all. “Okay.”

He smiled softly at me, impressed by my attempt to regulate my emotions.

“Good girl,” he said softly, gently rubbing my back. “I know you’re nervous, and you want to be done with this, but we still need to talk about this. We need to talk about what happened and how we’re going to handle it going forward. Can you be a good girl and listen to me, princess? Can you stay calm?”

“Yeah,” I said with a sigh. “Just… stop doing that when I’m not in trance.” I was referring to the ‘good girl’ part and the way he was talking in general. Made me feel like a child.

He chuckled softly, knowing exactly what I was referring to. “Alright, princess,” he said kindly. “I’ll cut back on the ‘good girl’ comments, and the gentle, caring tone.” He paused, a hint of dry humor in his voice. “But you know I enjoy babying you, right?”

“You enjoy having power,” I corrected, with a smile.

He chuckled softly, nodding in agreement.

“Yes, I do enjoy having power,” he admitted. “And you enjoy giving me that power, don’t you, princess?”

“Mmm. No.” I said lightly. I smirked as I said it- proof enough that it was the truth. “Only when you’ve got me all… hypnotized and submissive and whatnot. But that doesn’t count.”

He smirked at my cheeky response, shaking his head in amusement.

“Oh, it doesn’t count, does it?” he asked, a hint of dry amusement in his voice. “And why would that be, princess?”

“You know why!” I said, nudging him playfully. “You’re getting us off topic anyway. We were gonna talk about the argument, how I always felt like you were mocking or trashing or possessive or jealous. You know? I felt like I couldn’t get a good read on you, and I was anxious and on edge and I lashed out… I didn’t give you the chance to explain, and I’m sorry.”

He smiled softly at my nudge, his expression growing more serious as I continued. He listened quietly as I spoke, hearing the raw honesty and vulnerability in my voice.

“I understand, princess,” he said quietly. “And I appreciate your apology. You’re right, you didn’t give me a chance to explain myself. And I don’t blame you for feeling anxious and on edge all the time. I should’ve been more transparent with you, more open and communicative about my feelings.”

He paused for a moment, taking a deep breath.

“But it’s not just your fault, princess,” he continued quietly. “It’s my fault too. I should’ve realized how much my behavior was affecting you. I should’ve realized that you felt like I was mocking or trashing or possessive or jealous. And I should’ve done something about it.”

“There’s not much you can do if I don’t tell you it’s a problem,” I pointed out, softer. “I’m sorry.”

He smiled softly, gently rubbing my back.

“You’re right, princess,” he said quietly. “You’re right. You should’ve communicated your problem with me sooner, instead of letting it fester.”

He paused again, his expression more serious.

“But I should’ve been more attentive, princess. I should’ve noticed how you were feeling and how my behavior was affecting you, and I didn’t. I’m sorry, too.”

“Mmn…” I mumbled, burying my head against his chest. I tensed, holding him tightly. “I hate this, I hate arguing with you.”

He felt his heart ache a little at my mumbled words and the way I buried my head against his chest, feeling me tense up in his arms.

“I hate it too, princess,” he said quietly, holding me tightly in return. He gently stroked my hair, trying to soothe me. “I hate arguing with you too, I hate seeing you upset or angry, or hurt.”

“Are we… are we okay? Now?” I asked hesitantly, quietly. Afraid.

He felt his heart ache even more at my hesitant, quiet question. He could hear the fear in my voice, and it broke his heart.

“We’re okay, princess,” he said quietly, holding me even tighter. “We’re okay. I forgive you, and I hope you can forgive me too.”

“I forgave you ages ago!” I said with a small laugh. Ages ago meant the moment I asked him to make me forget. I felt bad at the time- still did. But it was better now.

“I should… oh god, I’ve been distracting you from work, haven’t I?” I looked up at him with a smile. “Should I go back to sitting here and looking pretty while you do your big business important CEO stuff?”

He chuckled softly at my comment about forgiving him, shaking his head in amusement.

“No, you haven’t been distracting me, princess,” he said quietly. “And you don’t have to sit here and look pretty, although I always appreciate that.” He pulled me closer to him, his expression more serious again. “But there’s one thing I want you to understand, princess,” he said quietly. “No more asking me to make you forget after arguments, okay?”

“But-” I was cut off as he placed his hand over my mouth.

He raised his eyebrow at my attempt to speak, quickly silencing me by placing his hand over my mouth. He held me tightly, his expression firm. “No,” he said firmly. “No ‘buts’ princess. That is not up for discussion. No more hypnosis to make you forget.”

I protested, though it was hard with his hand against him mouth. My words were muffled. I ended up licking his hand.

He chuckled softly at my attempt to protest, my words muffled by his hand. When I ended up licking his hand, he had to fight back a smirk.

“Princess,” he said, his voice taking on a warning tone. “Did you just lick my hand? I don’t think that’s how you’re supposed to protest.”

I whined and tried biting him instead.

He kept his hand over my mouth and held me tighter, shaking his head in amusement. “Princess,” he said, his voice more dominant this time. “If you keep trying to bite me, I’m going to put you back under hypnosis and punish you.”

“Nuh uh! I can’t ask you to use hypnosis to make me forget, you can’t use it to do that without my permission,” I said, half my words muffled and jumbled.

“And who says I can’t use hypnosis without your permission?” he asked, his voice still dominant. “I can put you under whenever I want to, princess. You agreed to that.”

“Did not!” I said, remembering that much clearly. I squinted at him and licked his hand again- the only way I could get back at him in the moment.

He felt me lick his hand again, his expression hardening in a warning. He could tell I was testing him, trying to get a rise out of him. “Stop licking me, princess,” he said firmly. “And you did agree to that. You agreed to let me hypnotize you whenever I wanted to.”

I shook my head confidently. He couldn’t lie to me- well, not on this, at least. I summoned the red string that bound him to me as a warning of my own. “Vincent,” I mumbled against his hand, making me look ridiculous despite my stern look. “I will not hesitate to bite you.”

He felt his throat tighten slightly at the sight of the red string that bound him to me. He knew that I was not making a hollow threat- I would bite him if I had to. He could feel my determination and defiance.

So he slowly removed his hand from my mouth, letting me speak. "Fine," he said. "You win this time, princess."

“Yes!” I cheered lightly, letting the red string disappear. “Haha!” I gave him a quick victory kiss.

He chuckled softly as he saw me cheer in victory and press a quick kiss to his lips. He found my enthusiasm endearing. “You’re such a little brat, you know that?” he said, his tone amused.

“Your little brat!” I corrected with a grin. “And you love me for it.”

He rolled his eyes playfully, shaking his head in amusement. “Yes, mine,” he agreed, his tone possessive. “And yes, I do love you for it. Even if you can be a bit of a pain in the ass sometimes.”

“You are too, sometimes,” I pointed out, repositioning myself in his lap.

He allowed me to reposition myself in his lap, wrapping an arm around my middle to hold me close. He smirked at my command. "You are seriously such a little brat," he said, amusement in his voice.

I had my back against his chest now, and pulled up some files he was meant to be working on. “Chop chop now! Your company won’t run itself.”

He glanced at the files I pulled up, shaking his head with dry humor. "Yes, yes, I suppose I should get back to work now."

He playfully ruffled my hair, before turning his attention to the files on his screen. He began reading through them, his expression slowly becoming more serious as he started working.

But every now and then, he'd find himself stealing glances at me, enjoying the sight and feeling of me sitting in his lap. He found it hard to focus on work with me being so close to him. Not that he minded.

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sandyca5tle · 2 days

Text

Slime HRT - 22 Months

Slime time again, and the goo keeps gooing.

General update on slime-ification - I’ve only got bones in my head left! All my musculature and squishy bits have dissolved now, so I’ve just got a skull floating in my goo. I noticed that all this dissolving happened way quicker than it had previously, which I’m guessing is due to my acid helping to break things down

I have to say, having your spine dissolve is very painful, turns out all those nerves do not enjoy being eaten away by acid/medicine. Additionally, having all those nerves change caused me to have various movement and coordination issues - I spend quite a bit of time over these past four months as a puddle of goo, just about able to shuffle towards food, which honestly sucked, not having proper control over my body is the exact opposite of what I want. Obviously there were moments when it was fine, and I was able to do things normally, but even then the pain typically persisted in the background.

One benefit has been that, since my spine fully dissolved, I’ve felt more in control of my body than ever, and while that might just be in contrast to having less-to-no control recently, I think I have actually improved. Some of my fine motor skills that I lost in the early stages have returned, and I can perform finer manipulations of and with my slime, and I just feel more connected to my body now, which is very neat.

I’ve been working under the assumption that my brain is still inside my skull, as I’ve heard you know when that goes, plus if I move my skull around I can get a little dizzy, so I’m pretty sure it’s still in there. On that note, yeah, I can move my skull around my body, since it’s the only part that isn’t goo, so there’s nothing really holding it in place. In theory I could take it out of my body, but I don’t wanna try that as I’m honestly afraid that could kill me (I think a lot of the lack of control while my spine was dissolving was due to the lack of connection to my brain to hold myself together while the nervous connections reconfigured to be slime), so for now I’ve got the neat party trick of being able to move my skull around my body.

Of course with all my fleshy bits melting away, I’ve had some interesting experiences with my senses and similar things. The first thing I’ll run through is eyesight - I didn’t have great eyesight before, but I found my eyesight slowly deteriorating which, especially combined with the struggle to remain coalesced from my spine degrading, was pretty terrifying. The only thing that kept me somewhat calm was being fairly certain that, as with my lungs, my body would learn to replicate the function of the organ. Fun fact - slimes don’t naturally have eyes, so when I lost my eyesight, it didn’t naturally come back. I sat for a decent while waiting in blackness, waiting for it to come back, much like I’d started absorbing air through my slime with my lungs, but it simply didn’t. The only reason I can see now is ‘cause I kinda just made it happen. I figured that even if it didn’t automatically happen, my body still had absorbed the organ, so it should be able to replicate its function, so I shaped myself some eyes, playing around with them until eventually I was able to see again. It seems short written out, but I was at this at least a good few hours, trying to work out how to replicate an eye - fortunately, it does seem like there’s at least an instinctive part of my new body that can help fill in gaps, so I didn’t have to consciously replicate every fine detail of an eye.

I do have to say, it took me a while to fine tune everything, started off with it being all very blurry and desaturated, but I eventually found where I was before, and actually, once I took my glasses off, I was able to correct my eyesight altogether. I do wonder if I can go even further, but with the experience so fresh in my mind, I’d rather my body get used to having eyes again as a default before I mess around more. Despite 20/20 vision being very nice, it is a little sad for me to no longer need my glasses, I’d gotten used to them, and it’s kinda a shame to see them go.

I do have to add, weird thing about slime eyes, since it’s all really just my slime seeing, I don’t need any depth to my eyes, frankly I don’t even need ‘eyes’ in the traditional sense - any part of my slime can see, I just have to choose to see from there and I can, so my eyes are just kinda indents in my face so that people have a reference point as to where I’m looking from. At some point I’ll mess around with additional eyes, but as before, I wanna make sure I don’t accidentally blind myself again.

Taste and smell are a pair that I’ll group together, since they’re linked in both humans and slimes anyways. Naturally, much like with my sight, I slowly lost both of them as the responsible parts were consumed by my slime, rendering me unable to taste or smell for a while. Honestly, compared to sight, this wasn’t such a bad loss - made meals very uninteresting for a while, but aside from that it was easy enough to work with. Honestly, I’m not sure I ever really got them back properly, despite trying, I was never able to force them back into being like I did with my sense of sight. One day I did begin to taste again I noticed, although I also noticed it had definitely changed. For one, I can kind of switch it on or off, and for another I can now taste anything I eat, regardless of if I put it in my mouth, or just absorb it. It’s neat, and also definitely adds to the lack of distinction between differently shaped parts of my body - my mouth doesn’t do anything special with regards to eating, it’s just habit to eat through there, I can eat, and taste, just as well through any part of my body.

Smell however hasn’t come back, well at least, not really in a human sense - I can ‘smell’ things, but it’s more like tasting the air, rather than actually smelling. I’m guessing it’s because I don’t have to breathe any more, so I’m not inhaling the particles, instead, I simply absorb them passively as I move around. Of course, since this is now tied to my taste, turning that off stops me from smelling, so I’ve been trying to find a middle ground where I don’t taste things all the time/don’t taste things I don’t wanna, but can still smell - haven’t quite found the sweet spot yet.

On the topic of the mouth becoming redundant as a defined part of my body, I also lost my voice once my vocal chords were subsumed. These, fortunately, were the easiest to restore, or at least achieve the same function, simply by vibrating my slime to produce sound. It took me a little while to work out how to do this, but given the amount of time I’ve spent learning how to shape my slime, it wasn’t too hard. I have to concede that at first it was very wet and gurgly sounding, but I spent time working to refine it, and now it sounds much better. The slightly funky part is that it does sound different to my old voice… which I’m not sure how to feel about - I wasn’t overly fond of my voice before but it was familiar, and suddenly having a new voice is weird - I’m still adjusting it to find a voice that’s overall closer to what I had before, but I am having fun playing around with it a little. Oh, and of course, as with tasting, since I can do this from anywhere on my body, again, the ‘speciality’ of my mouth is kind of redundant, it’s just simply a shape on my body which is familiar and a hangover from my time as a human.

Surprisingly, my hearing hasn’t been affected yet, not even sounding like I’m underwater - I’m guessing that since bones go last, my ear bones and all that haven’t gone yet… and that maybe my slime is acting in place of my eardrum, assuming that that has also been absorbed. I’m guessing that that’s gonna go at some point over the next few months.

As for the rest of what’s been going on, I’ve continued to try to practise controlling my acidity, and I’ve gotten a little better, I’m able to make portions of my body neutral pretty easily now, buuut if I stop focusing it immediately returns to acid, not to mention it’s only parts at a time. I did get a suggestion about using air pockets to produce safe areas within myself to store objects - kinda a fly in amber situation (y’know, since I’m literally sap) - which has been useful, although since I don’t breath anymore, providing the air has been a little difficult, but I worked out how to move air around with my slime so I can blow on things now, as well as make the pockets. Still gonna focus on my acidity control, but until I’ve got that down, I’ve got a good work around!

On the shaping front, I've added a few new features to my form. First, I gave myself horns, and made my ears kinda aquatic looking, kinda like fins, but ears, like merpeople are sometimes depicted with. Neither of these particularly do anything, but I like how they look. On the more ‘functional’ side I shaped myself a pair of cat ears, and some big ol’ dragon wings on my back, of course all made from slime. I put the ‘functional’ in quotation marks since neither really work for their intended function, so they’re also only decorative at this time, but I’m hoping I can get them to work eventually. The cat ears don’t work since I’m pretty sure I’m still reliant on my human hearing system which doesn’t connected to cat ears on the top of my head (unlike my fin-ears which just replaced/were reshaped from my old ears) and I haven’t worked out how to fly with the wings yet - and I’m honestly not sure if my slime will let me, gonna have to experiment more with them.

On top of all of these, and combined with having had a lot of issues holding my humanoid form over the past few months, I’ve actually been experimenting with a sort of slime ball form. It’s very nice, small, and definitely adds to my feeling of ‘slimeness’, plus it’s a form that fits my skull pragmatically and aesthetically (main reason i haven’t shrunk my humanoid form is ‘cause i’d have to keep my head approximated the same size to house my skull, which’d lead to weird proportions). Only issue is, while the hopping isn’t exhausting (no need to breathe and no muscles means exertion isn’t as bothersome) it does kinda rattle my skull, and therefore brain, around which makes me a little dizzy.

Kinda can’t believe I’m saying this, but I can’t wait for my brain to go and leave me fully slime, it’s gonna be so awesome!

See y’all next time! Goobye! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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@calliecwrites, @friedsputnik, @now-entering-the-goop-zone, @scrubbinn, @lilacinthefog, @mint-and-authoress, @losttodreams, @redroversendjayover, @ariathelamia, @kanithedemoncat, @copperweave

#slime hrt #slime girl #non-human hrt #species hrt #humanity replacement therapy #transgender #my writing

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cillianwilder · 2 days

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Your Brain's Dirty Little Sex Box Got You "Friend Zoned"

And Only Narcissists Think The Friend Zone Is Real

I originally published this post on Cashmere Ink.

This one is for the boys. However, the advice will work for some of the ladies as well, if they find themselves in a similar situation. Today I'm going to cover my thoughts on how to get out of the “friend zone”, and my opinion might not be what you'd expect.

Before I get started, I'd like to say that the last time I tricked myself into the friend zone was in high school. I don't even remember the details because it wasn't as defining for me as it is for some, but I'm sure I've felt that way as a man. I believe that's simply because no one in high school has a very high emotional IQ.

I’d also like to say that I'm not a mental health expert and everything here is just my opinion. I've always been the type of person drawn to self improvement, so I’m including some resources for improving love life and social skills in case you find yourself interested.

Use these products with integrity. It's one thing to improve your social skills and confidence (and even get laid), but it's another to toy with people’s emotions.

Find Dating and Self-Help Products Online

The Dating Playbook For Men

Dating Sucks, But You Don’t (For Men)

Why Men Love Bitches (For Women)

Small Talk Made Simple (For All)

Outdated (For All)

The Power of the P*ssy (For Women)

Never Chase Men Again (For Women)

Stealth Attraction (For Men)

Soulmate Sketch (For Fun)

Affiliate Disclosure

What Exactly Is The “Friend Zone”?

It's a term. That's all it is. And it's used mostly by men to describe their relationship with a woman that doesn't want to be intimate with them. It can be used lightly as a joke. However, there are some deep, dark, redpilled corners of the internet where it's seen as such a despicable position to be in, that you’re considered a “simp” or an “incel” if you have a relationship with a woman that doesn't extend beyond being friends.

The Friend Zone Isn’t Real

I don't actually believe the friend zone exists. I don't think anyone except a manipulative narcissist can put you in such a place. I believe that if you're feeling friend-zoned, you've done it to yourself because of your mindset - a mindset with symptoms of manipulation and narcissism attached to it.

The friend zone only exists in your mind.

Does that mean if you forget the friend zone altogether that you can go out and have sex with whomever you please, regardless of how they view your relationship? No, obviously not. That’s clearly wrong and doesn't make any sense.

So let me explain myself. Let's start with the basics.

Can Men and Women Just Be Friends?

Yes. Here's the black and white reality when it comes to relationships:

People are friends if they both choose to be friends.

People are in romantic relationships if they both want to be in a romantic relationship.

That's it. End of story. This also means that anyone in your life is as important as you choose for them to be. Do you not want to be friends with that person? Don't be. Do you only want a sexual or romantic relationship that they do not want? Move on. Starting with these simple facts, it's easy to figure out where you stand with someone. Once that's been surmised, it's up to you whether or not you continue to stand in that place.

Are you friends with a woman only because you hope to eventually have sex with her? That's on you.

You've officially friend-zoned yourself.

Why It’s Disrespectful For The Friend Zone to Even Be Considered a Relationship Reality

Again, things are pretty simple. Either you're friends or you're not. If you are only friends with someone because you're secretly hoping that it will turn into something more later on, you're the one that’s wrong.

You're pretending to be someone’s friend with an ulterior motive. It’s manipulative and it's disrespectful to what friendship truly is. You're a fake friend and therefore the two of you are not friends.

How could you be friend-zoned by someone that you're not even really friends with? They can't put you in any kind of box with the label “friend” on it. You can believe that you're there though.

Why Does The Friend Zone Only Exist In Your Mind?

That's simple too. You put your “friend” in a box. Your dirty little sex box. By doing so, you set the tone for your relationship. You never had a chance of being truly open and connected to her in the first place. By doing so, you cheated yourself out of the chance to have friendship, sex, or a relationship all at once.

When you set your sights on having a specific outcome in a situation, you're limiting your own capabilities and opportunities. No doubt, you're constantly trying to manipulate the situation to seem attractive and appealing to that person, instead of just being yourself.

She's in your dirty little sex box, so in your mind you're nothing to her until your vision of what she is to you has come to fruition. Until your plan is complete, you consider yourself to be in the friend zone. Meanwhile, she might consider you a true friend.

If you keep this mindset, you’ll eventually be overcome with anger and resentment. You’ll get tired of her “choosing everyone else over you” and you’ll have an outburst or ghost her completely. For her sake, I hope it's the second option. Congratulations, you have the emotional intelligence of a kindergartner.

“She doesn't like me back, so I'm big mad.”

How to Get Out of Your Friend Zone

First off, change your mindset. It's not a real place. You're either friends or you're not. There are no zones and you are only in control of your own actions and thoughts. So, if you're in the friend zone, take yourself out of it. You’ll feel a lot better, dude.

Decide whether this girl is your friend or not. To do this, simply ask yourself “Do I want to be just a friend to this person?” If the answer involves “It’s complicated” or “No”, then the answer is “No.” Let me tell you why.

She's going to live life and do her own thing, with the people she wants to do it with. That includes romantic relationships that will inevitably make you feel things like rage, jealousy, resentment, anxiety, and depression. Do the both of you a favor and skip all that noise.

You're only going to end up pushing her away and hurting her if you can't see her as only a friend. You’ll never be able to be a real friend. That's not fair to anyone.

How to Avoid Feeling Like You're In The Friend Zone Now

If you have a woman that you're feeling “friend-zoned” by, you've got two options:

Option #1

You can come clean and tell her that you like her more than a friend. If she doesn't feel the same way it will inevitably lead to option two. So if you know that she doesn't feel the same way, skip this part. Especially if you've already told her in the past. No need to tell her what she already knows.

Option #2

You can drop the “friendship”. Distance yourself and work on you. Your sense of self worth should never be defined by what you are to someone else anyways, so you've got some growing to do. You can do this without being a dick about it too, and you’ll feel a lot better in the future.

For example, you can let her know that you’re in a phase of your life where you need to do some work on yourself, so you’re going to be out of contact while you do it. Then actually do the work. Read some books, hit the gym, eat better, whatever it is you need to do to actually better yourself. This way, you're not a liar. Also, you’ll feel better and you’ll think better.

Sitting around and stewing about what you “sacrificed” and being pissed off isn't going to help you. Just continuing on as you are without her in your life would make you a liar and you’ll inevitably be in this situation with someone else down the line. You've got to actually change things.

I believe option two is actually the best one. If you break contact for a while to work on yourself, you might find that you actually value this woman as a friend regardless of your original intentions. You might find that sex and/or a relationship doesn't matter when it comes to her. Then you can pick back up where you left off, except this time you can actually view her as a person instead of an idea, and put your best self forward.

If you do the work and find that you're still not capable of being friends with her, that's fine too. Either check in long enough to tell her how you feel if you didn't the first time, or don't reconnect at all. You’re still not a liar and friendships come and go. You don't have to explain yourself, you're already the bad guy.

Don't worry about how she feels about it. You're doing the right thing by distancing yourself from something that you can't handle. I'm sure she'd rather lose a friend than have some angry “nice guy” hanging around with his ups and downs all the time.

If you want to be honest, be honest and end things, but do it respectfully and make that the end of it. I feel like I shouldn't need to say this, but don’t push things. That story about how grandpa just wouldn't take no for an answer and grandma didn't realize it was true love until she gave in gets less cute every day.

How to Avoid Feeling Friend Zoned In The Future

If you want to avoid feeling “friend-zoned” by women in the future:

Learn to be direct, without being aggressive. Learn to be confident, without being arrogant. Learn to pay women compliments, without being creepy and pushy. This is where simplicity goes out the window and things become more nuanced.

If you meet a woman and your brain wants to put her in its dirty little sex box, then that should be how you approach the situation. You need to put the fear of getting shot down aside and let her know you’re attracted to her right out of the gate, or play it cool and don't get too involved right away. Sit with your thoughts and feelings for a while and decide how to approach it later on.

There's nothing wrong with asking “How can we connect later?” And then, if you're given that information, use that connection to let her know up front that you think she's got perfect child-bearing hips and you'd like to fertilize her womb as soon as possible.

I'm kidding. Never say that.

Tell her you think she’s pretty and fun, or whatever adjectives you choose to use, and that you'd like to get to know her better if she's up for a date. If you get a no, you get a no. Move on. Life is all about moving forward, I hope you're getting that message. Learn to be graceful, with both your wins and your losses, and move forward.

Above all, do not give someone the impression that you're willing to hang around and be friends if you're not actually willing to do that. It does not make you a bad guy to want to have a relationship with someone, or just sex, and nothing else. There are women that want that too. Just don't deceive them into thinking that you're their friend.

That's right. If you tricked yourself into the friend zone, she was never the one stringing you along. You were doing enough of that for the both of you. (Probably. Keep reading.)

When Is The Friend Zone Real?

Now that I've covered how the friend zone is mostly a mental trap that people trick themselves into, let's talk about when someone can actually “friend zone” you themselves. In this case it wouldn't be called friend zoning. It would be called leeching.

A narcissist that gets you in their sights can easily decide that they'll let you hope for more while using you for personal gain. Again, it's not really the friend zone because you're not actually friends. In this case, you believe that you're friends or that they are a potential partner because they give you the idea that it’s the case. Then they’ll ask you for favors and take up your time and money for their own personal gain.

Now the roles are reversed, so I hope that if you didn't see the correlation before, you do now.

This person put you in a box when they first met you. Their dirty little leech box. Then they pretended to be your friend. They showed all the signs of being your friend or potential partner, but only because they wanted other things.

When you don't give these people what they want, they'll let you know just how much they don't care by throwing a fit or ghosting you. They'll tell everyone how they’re the victim and they might even actually feel like the victim. They're not though. They put themselves in that position.

Sound familiar?

If you've been deceived like this and you've come to realize it, I'm truly sorry. The best thing I believe you can do is cut off contact with someone like that.

My main message: Stop believing in the friend zone. Take control of your mind and your life. Honesty and communication are the key to all good relationships, no matter what form.

I hope this has helped you or at least pissed you off enough that you ruminate on what it all means.

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professionaljester · 10 months

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beating my brain into submission anytime it wants to draw bc i’ve told it for weeks now we’re done with that. we’re not an artist anymore stop trying to make art happen

#abc shut it #vent #it’s just not happening i’ve been trying for YEARS since my TEENS #and i just cannot make the connections i need bc no one wants to be my friend bc i can’t socialize #ppl show no interest in me or my art and if they do it’s out of pity to get me to stop whining #so i’m done #no one wants to help an autisic bitch out to get their career off the ground #all i get told is i need to go out and make the connections #as if i’m not doing that i go around conventions talking and trying to connect with other artists but it doesn’t work it just doesn’t work #i need fucking help to get my shit out there bc i literally cannot do it on my own #i’ve been fuckkng trying #but no one wants to help me so i just figure this all out myself #and i get told talk in the artist alley server as if it’s not an overwhelming mess to look at and i don’t know what conversations belong #where #i’ve never been apart of a crazy big discord server like this i’ve frankly barely been in any servers at all!#what the fuck am i suppose to be doing in this fucking mess to make friends #no one wants to tell me how discord works bc you just need to use it and figure it out #but i’m not going to use it if it’s overwhelming and i don’t know how it works #i barely know what half the shit included in discord is for or does #i’ve never been apart of a group order bc i don’t have friends and no one will want me to be in their orders anyway #I DONT KNOW HOW ANY OF THIS SHIT WORKS AND NO ONE WANTS TK HELP ME #THEY JUST SAY DO IT LIKE IM NOT AUTISIC AND NEED TK BE SHOWN

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panharmonium · 6 months

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Hi! I love your Naruto thoughts and meta posts with all my heart and I want to ask your thoughts on something that has been on my mind literally since I was 13: what do you think about the relationship between Sasuke and Sakura? I went from being a hardcore shipper when I was a teenager, to being against any romantic relationship in Naruto after finishing the anime when I was in my early twenties. Nowadays I'm very into platonic love and depictions of friendship and I think the anime's obsession with forcing the "romantic interest" curse upon the main female character robbed us of... so much. There are a few wonderful moments in the anime where Sasuke and Sakura acknowledge each other, but because she's always "the girl with the crush", her actions are so often interpret as irrational or selfish by the fandom.

Hi @riemmetric! It's great to talk to you again! Sorry it's taken me so long to answer this; RL has been making demands of me lately and it took me way longer to finish writing this up than I wanted it to (then again, I knew from the minute I read your original ask that my reply was going to get long, so I suppose I should have predicted a delay XD)

It's funny, my sister once asked me to choose between Sasuke or Sakura for an “unpopular opinion” meme, and I ended up doing Sasuke solely because I think the negative fandom opinions about Sakura are so unhinged and divorced from the actual text that I wouldn’t even know where to start. People are entitled to dislike whatever characters they want, obviously, but there are some fandom takes that are, for me, so obviously rooted in bad faith viewings/readings that there’s no urge in me to discuss them. That said, since you asked, I’m happy to go into my own thoughts on this a bit, with the disclaimer for other potential readers that I only write about fandom things for my own personal enjoyment, not as a contribution to The Discourse. If you don’t like Sakura, great! I have no interest in changing your mind. Please consider this a sincere invitation to scroll on by and go enjoy whatever parts of the fandom appeal to you.

In general terms: I love Sasuke and Sakura’s relationship as much as I love all of the relationships in Team 7. If we’re talking about them specifically as a romantic couple, then I probably fall somewhere in the middle of the spectrum, because I do like them together in a post-canon (to be clear: non-Boruto) setting, after time has passed and they’ve continued to develop individually and reconnect with each other, but I also wouldn’t exactly call myself an intense “shipper,” in the sense that I have no interest in pulling things out from the text and incorrectly citing them as evidence that Sasuke has hidden romantic feelings for her during the canon period. He cares about her in the canon period, just like he cares about Naruto and Kakashi. That’s not up for interpretation; it’s the text. But Sasuke during the canon time period does not demonstrate specifically romantic interest in anyone.

[A note before people who might ship Sasuke with Someone Else emerge to rail against this statement - please just scroll past and continue enjoying fandom in whatever way is most fun for you. It is cool to ship whatever fanon thing you want; I think that’s great! But earnestly citing any loving or emotional thing Sasuke does re: various characters in this story (yes, Sakura included) as indicative of specifically romantic love isn’t supported by the text. I know there are always going to be enormous subsets of any fandom who insist that it is, and I'm certainly not going to barge into anyone else's space to complain about that (because other people having fun together is harmless and none of my business), but I'm not obligated to indulge it on my own blog, either.]

Anyway, that said - the reason why I love Sakura and Sasuke’s relationship (from here on out I’ll use “relationship” in a general, non-romantic sense) is precisely because Sakura isn’t just “the girl with the crush.” Sakura has an arc when it comes to Sasuke, and its trajectory moves in the exact opposite direction of “irrational” or “selfish.” She specifically goes from “the girl with the crush” to “the girl who steels herself and tries to put her personal feelings for Sasuke aside for the greater good” to “the girl who knows she can’t put her feelings aside, but who also knows full well that Sasuke doesn’t reciprocate them, and who still wants to save him regardless, because he matters to her as a person and a friend.”

[I'm putting the rest of this under a cut to save everyone's dash, and also to emphasize once again that this is a personal post on my personal blog which I wrote in response to a question from a personal acquaintance, the full content of which no one is obligated to read. I am not sending this post to random strangers and forcing them to look at it. I'm not even putting it in the character tags. I'm typing it up on my own blog and putting it under a cut. If you already know that you don't like Sakura, but you still click the link/read the post and then feel an urge to comment and complain, I am going to copy-paste this disclaimer and remind you that I specifically recommended that you scroll past and go have fun with fandom in your own way. Thanks in advance for responsibly curating your own fandom experience!]

So, from the top:

1. the girl with the crush

Sakura is, obviously, completely obsessed with Sasuke at the beginning of Part 1. She’s also deeply clueless about him and his history (bizarre though it is, the story seems to indicate that she initially doesn’t know what happened with his family, the same way young!Obito is initially clueless about Kakashi’s father). But what I like about Sakura and Sasuke’s Part 1 relationship is how this changes over time.

The critical scene that kicks this off happens right at the beginning of the manga, when she and Sasuke are talking by that bench - she complains about Naruto and blames his behavior on him being all alone/having no family to scold him; and even says she’s jealous that he doesn’t have parents to nag him all the time. This obviously triggers an outburst from Sasuke, who tells her she has no idea what loneliness means and that she “makes him sick”/she’s “annoying” (importantly, the exact same thing Sakura said to Naruto in anger earlier that day), which in turn prompts Sakura to reassess herself and wonder whether she’s been making Naruto feel this terrible all the time, too:

From that point on, it’s a process of her putting little pieces together. She still has a MAJOR crush, and she still acts like a twelve year-old, but as we approach the end of Part I, Sakura actually has a more accurate grasp on Sasuke’s current state of mind than Naruto does. Naruto is initially excited to fight Sasuke on top of the hospital, because he feels like Sasuke’s finally acknowledging him, whereas Sakura is the one who immediately recognizes that something is wrong about this situation. She is also the one who, after this fight, is concerned that Sasuke is really unwell and might do something drastic like run off in pursuit of the power Orochimaru promised him, but when she communicates this to Naruto, he assures her that this would NEVER happen:

(Sakura isn't convinced, though, because she goes to monitor the exit out of the village anyway.)

I’m not criticizing Naruto for his response here. I ADORE hearing him say that Sasuke is too strong to need Orochimaru, with such perfect confidence - I love seeing how much respect and admiration he has for Sasuke underneath all their fighting, because that’s the whole reason he’s always baiting Sasuke and yelling at him and claiming “you're not so great!” He looks up to Sasuke; he wants to be like Sasuke; he thinks Sasuke is awesome! (It’s that Obito @ Kakashi behavior, you know?) But the fact remains that he is clueless about what’s actually going on with Sasuke in Part 1, and he remains clueless(ly optimistic) for a long time.

(Eg, when he catches up to Sasuke during the retrieval arc and Sasuke climbs out of that cursed seal coffin, Naruto waves at him and calls "Come on, let's go!" as if Sasuke has been successfully rescued and is now going to come running home. Even in Part II, when Naruto hears that Sasuke killed Orochimaru, he beams and immediately says, “So he must be on his way back to the Leaf Village!” And everyone else in the room is like, “....,” because they know better. Naruto doesn’t yet fully understand [or doesn't want to accept] the extent to which Sasuke has willingly chosen this path, and it’s not until after Jiraiya’s death/the Pain attack/the Five Kage Summit that Naruto really starts to understand Sasuke more clearly, which is something he himself admits.)

Sakura, in Part 1, has access to more information about Sasuke - she’s there for his first dissociative monologue during the bells test, she’s there for the curse mark’s placement, she’s there for his first violent transformation in the Forest of Death - she is, in fact, the unwitting catalyst for it (“Sakura…who did this to you?”), and her compassion is the reason Sasuke is later able to overcome the curse mark’s influence - so she has a more accurate/complete picture of “how he’s doing,” for lack of a better phrase, whereas Naruto, who doesn’t know about the curse mark in the first place, is still in the dark. This means that Sakura is able to accurately discern that Sasuke is struggling more than Naruto realizes, and specifically to predict that he’s going to run away.

(This dynamic is then interestingly flipped in the back half of Part II, since at any point after the Five Kage Summit, Sakura doesn’t have access to extremely relevant [if currently questionable and unproven] details that would in any other circumstance inform her behavior).

Of course, just because she has more info in Part 1 doesn’t mean she has some kind of miraculous insight into Sasuke’s every thought and feeling. There are parts of her attempt to convince Sasuke to stay in the village that are as clueless as any of Naruto’s assumptions, and they showcase the kind of magical thinking common to childhood - like when she says that if he stayed with her, she could give him happiness, she’d do anything for him, even help him get his revenge - this idea that she herself can do something to make him feel better, that she can love him powerfully enough to defeat his pain - obviously none of that is rooted in realism.

Is this part of her approach irrational and immature and inadvertently self-centered? Of course it is! But it’s no more irrational and immature and inadvertently self-centered than Naruto’s stated plan to drag Sasuke back to the village even if he has to “break every bone in [his] body!”

Hating on Sakura for her Part 1 attempt to convince Sasuke to stay in the village while simultaneously lauding Naruto for his feels like a bad faith misread of what is, to me, pretty clear narrative intention. The story doesn’t at any point intend for us to see her begging him to stay as a selfish or conniving attempt to get something she wants. She’s begging him to stay for the same underlying reason that Naruto is: she cares about him. She thinks he’s making a mistake that will only cause him more pain in the end (she’s right) and she wants to make it so he feels less pain right now (she can’t. But she doesn’t understand that/isn’t able to admit that, and she’s willing to try ANYTHING that might help).

It’s critical that this farewell scene is set in front of that same bench from their first important confrontation - she references that day and how angry he got at her, and this time she tells him that she understands his reaction. She’s learned things and she recognizes how insensitive she was being back then (“I know what happened to your clan, Sasuke”), even though she still can’t fully grasp all the complexities of the situation. She tells him that him blowing up at her back then helped her understand what loneliness actually meant (as opposed to her previous shallow understanding of it), and she challenges him about his choice right now: "So that's it, you're choosing the lonely path?" And when she tells him that she'll be very lonely if he leaves, we're immediately shown a panel of Sasuke thinking of both his friends, with the very clear implication that if he goes through with this, he will be lonely without them, too - that he's still struggling with the idea of leaving them, no matter how hard he tries to pretend:

Sakura at this point knows that Sasuke isn’t interested in her the way she is in him, but she still wants to give him happiness, however fantastical and immature her ideas sound to us (and, I’m sure, to him). “I’ll do anything, even help you get your revenge/we'll have fun every day, and...and you'll be happy! I'll make sure of it!” - of course, it’s completely childish. It’s irrational. It’s ridiculous to think that any of this would ever be effective, but no more ridiculous than Naruto’s belief that he can simply break every bone in Sasuke’s body and keep him in the Leaf by force.

Both Naruto and Sakura are children who have a deeply oversimplified understanding of Sasuke’s situation. They both still think they can fix him themselves. They both think they can save him themselves. They both think they can convince (or force) him to do what they want, what they think is in his best interests. Both of them don’t yet understand that he has to want to come back, if it’s ever going to mean anything. Their attempts to keep him in the village are immature and unrealistic, yes. What they aren’t, however, is selfish, because neither Sakura nor Naruto are doing any of this with the intention of advancing their own interests. They’re only thinking about Sasuke - how to keep Sasuke safe, how to make Sasuke happy - even when neither of them are taking an approach that will actually work.

Naruto and Sakura are children. They’re afraid of losing somebody they care about. Their attempts to prevent that from happening are desperate and messy and ultimately ineffective, but they are also genuinely felt and rooted in a true desire to rescue Sasuke from his pain, which - and this is the single most important thing that should impact our viewing of Part 1 - is something that Sasuke RECOGNIZES. He doesn’t spend that agonizingly long moment bowed over Naruto’s defeated body so we can pretend he doesn’t understand that Naruto was just trying to help him. He doesn’t take the time to murmur, “Sakura…thank you,” before laying her out carefully on a bench, just so we can discount it and pretend that he doesn’t recognize and appreciate her genuine intention to make things better for him, however clumsy that attempt might have been.

2. the greater good

If Stage 1 Sakura is "the girl with the crush," then Stage 2 Sakura is a progression to “the girl who decides to put her feelings for Sasuke aside in order to protect innocent people, including (but certainly not limited to) Naruto.” She’s driven to this decision by interactions with Shikamaru, who all too recently had to grow up fast himself (“We're not kids anymore...we can't allow a war to break out between the Hidden Leaf and the Hidden Cloud because of Sasuke") and Sai, who risks his new friendship with Sakura and Team 7 in order to speak some hard truths and deliver one of my favorite lines in the whole story: “I don’t know what promise Naruto made to you, but it’s really no different than what was done to me. It’s like a curse mark.”

(INCREDIBLE. How can anybody be complaining about a season where Sai gets to say something that goes THIS HARD and Sakura LISTENS and takes DRAMATIC ACTION that actually propels the story forward in a meaningful way - )

[Okay, yeah, brief personal opinion interlude - it is just bonkers wild to me that there are people who complain about Sakura in the Five Kage Summit arc. That entire season is the greatest character arc she ever has. Literally she has never been more interesting and dynamic than in Season 10; it’s the first time she ever gets to be as deep and fascinating as the boys; what is everybody so worked up about? Oh, “she lied to Naruto that one time” - Sasuke joined infant-kidnapping baby-murdering human experimentation machine Orochimaru when he was twelve years old in order to (dare I say it????) selfishly pursue his personal goals and yet, somehow, we are still able to root for him. He abandoned his friends/allies to imprisonment and death (Suigetsu and Jūgo) or outright stabbed them in the chest himself (Karin) in order to (SELFISHLY) get what he wanted, and yet, somehow, we are still able to love him, understand him, and be on his side. Naruto is canonically not upset with Sakura about her lie after receiving context for the situation and I think we can probably take our cues from him without feeling the need to bring her up on war crimes; please calm down]

[Sorry, I just really love most of Season 10 and think it’s one of the best examples of how good this story can be when every single character gets to do something that matters (as opposed to things being all Naruto, all the time) so I get a little bit worked up over people complaining about some of the best writing Sakura ever gets. I don’t understand what certain elements of fandom want from her. People complain about her being “useless” and not doing anything that contributes to the story, but then they complain just as much when she does finally get to act decisively and have just as complex/dynamic an inner world as the boys. She’s “weak” for being unreasonably in love with Sasuke, but when she tries to be “strong” and put her love for him aside and eliminate him in order to protect Naruto and the rest of the world, she’s evil, because she should have been more understanding of his situation (despite the fact that she doesn’t KNOW anything about his situation). But then when she can’t go through with killing him after all because she cares about him too much despite the things he’s done, she’s not "compassionate" or "kind" or "a good friend," she’s “weak” again. Nothing Sakura does in S10 is more wrongheaded or rash than any of the batshit, buckwild things Naruto and Sasuke have done in the past (and will continue to do in the future), but when Naruto and Sasuke have big feelings or take bold action, it makes them interesting characters, whereas Sakura can’t breathe in anyone’s direction without being minutely scrutinized for moral impurities.]

Anyway. Back to a more measured response.

Every single piece of development Sakura has with regard to Sasuke in this season satisfies me so much. Her initial shock and disbelief at hearing that Sasuke had joined the Akatsuki? Good, appropriate. The fact that she starts to acknowledge the reality of what Sasuke’s done sooner than Naruto does? Also extremely appropriate, very in-character for both of them. Her taking Sai’s words to heart and deciding that the promise she asked Naruto to make when they were children is causing him to suffer and she has to relieve him of that burden? Juicy! AND thematically significant (promises!!!! the burden that a promise places on a person, especially when it can't be kept - we've seen that before in this story and we'll see it again). Her anguished pivot from wanting to protect Sasuke to realizing that she has a responsibility to protect the countless innocents who will die because of the war he’s trying to start? HELLO THIS IS INCREDIBLE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT. Her knocking out the classmates who agreed to help her so they don’t have to share in her burden (and so the only person Naruto will hate when it’s over is her)? BRUH. Her being so committed and focused on her goal of saving innocents and protecting Naruto (not just from being harmed by Sasuke/the Akatsuki, but by the possibility that Naruto will someday have to hurt Sasuke himself) that she tries to take everything on by herself and walks into a confrontation that she absolutely cannot win?? INCREDIBLE. (Literally the first time I watched this, I said, “Finally!!! It’s Sakura’s turn to go off the rails!” I laughed with my sister about how Kakashi isn’t even mad, because Naruto and Sasuke have been pulling stunts like this for years and Sakura was way overdue for her own meltdown.) And then, after Kakashi intervenes in the fight - Sakura barreling back into the battle when she realizes he’s going to take on the burden of killing Sasuke himself in order to spare her and Naruto the horror - “I can’t let Kakashi-sensei bear this burden!” I love her for that.

And then, of course, in the end - her not being able to do hurt Sasuke after all. Despite committing herself to the act, despite forcing herself to put her feelings for him aside, despite resolving to stop him from starting a war and killing innocent people, she can’t harm him. She cares about him too much. This, too, is thematically significant - think about Itachi’s “you don’t have enough hatred” - she doesn’t have enough hatred to kill someone she cares about, even if it seems like he deserves it, even if would be the right thing to do to protect others. She can’t do it, and Sasuke almost kills her for her compassion.

I love the dynamic this sets up between her and Sasuke, for a few reasons:

1) Personally, I think Sasuke respects Sakura much more for trying to kill him than he would have if she’d just tried to talk him out of his behavior or beg him to come home (a la their original confrontation in Part 1). This is the first significant interaction he’s had with Sakura in years, and the fact that she does something SO contrary to his memory of her is an important demonstration of the fact that she’s not the same girl she used to be. Sasuke spends a lot of time after his defection declaring to his old team “I’ve changed; I’m not that person anymore,” but this is one of the moments where he’s forced to acknowledge that his teammates have changed, too. Time didn’t just stop for them when he left. While he was turning into someone new, so were they. They grew up without him, and his old memories of them can’t encompass the whole picture of who they are now.

(This is a little tangential, but in general, I love the spectrum of reactions that Naruto, Sakura, and Kakashi have in this sequence, and the way that all of them are ultimately messages Sasuke needs to hear. Sasuke - who we know textually regrets what he did here, who apologizes to Sakura for it later - for “everything,” in fact - needs Naruto’s aggressively optimistic open-arms policy, yes, needs that potential, that unconditional possibility of return. He also needs Sakura’s refusal to let him hurt her friends and start a war that will kill thousands of people, needs her surprisingly ruthless attempt to take him down; needs just as much her failure to do so, because it shows him that she still loves him too much to kill him even as she condemns him. And he needs Kakashi’s grim line in the sand, needs someone who very possibly won't hesitate like Sakura (despite the horrifying personal cost), someone who will try to reach him but also won't let him escape and become the next generation’s Orochimaru, who won't let him cause untold suffering to untold numbers of people just because a teacher loved him too much to stop him when he had the chance.

(And then even Kakashi chooses not to deliver a killing blow when he has the opportunity -)

(I know that in fandom people are more likely to be all, “oh, Naruto Good, everybody else Bad,” but I don’t think the narrative frames Sakura or Kakashi as “worse” than Naruto in any way. The story goes out of its way to make it clear how desperately they don’t want to hurt Sasuke and how much they care about him. And [this is just my interpretation, so obviously I won’t claim it as fact], I personally think that Sasuke - Sasuke, who, looking back, can see how lost he was then and how tortured he would have been if he’d gone through with many of his plans - would be grateful to Sakura and Kakashi for making an attempt to stop him when he couldn’t stop himself.)

2) On the other side of this, the fact that Sakura wasn’t able to deliver the killing blow means a lot. Sasuke was incapacitated under that bridge; he was completely at her mercy - but she stopped with the kunai an inch from his back. She couldn’t kill him, even though she knew that he was completely willing to kill her (because he'd attempted to Chidori-assassinate her from behind just a few minutes ago). That’s huge! Sasuke is too out of his head right now to process this or understand it, but later, it's going to matter. She stayed her hand. She spared his life. She loved him too much to hurt him, even when he’d given her every reason to take him down. She hesitated, and he almost killed her for it, but her inability to strike him ultimately gave him yet another chance to come home, another chance to get better, another chance to have a life outside of his pain. Despite everything, some part of her still hadn’t really given up on him, and that knowledge will matter later, when he’s finally able to acknowledge it.

The point of all this is to say that I really have no complaints about Sakura and Sasuke’s dynamic in their S10 confrontation. This season is the point where Sakura fully grows past her “girl with a crush” stage and into her “shinobi must make very harsh decisions” adulthood, but it never means that she doesn’t care about the person she’s trying to take down. Her ultimate inability to deliver the killing blow remains a dangling lifeline for her relationship with Sasuke, an open door that Sasuke is able to walk through at the end of the story (literally, in fact, when Sakura opens that portal for him and saves him from Kaguya’s desert prison, and figuratively, too, when Sasuke apologizes to her).

3. she only wants to save you

The last stage in their relationship is what Sakura settles into during the war arc. She started off Part 1 being just a girl with a crush, then tried to harden her heart and put her feelings for Sasuke aside in service of the greater good, but she was unable to actually follow through and kill him, and because of that, what she’s come to accept by the war arc is actually two things: that 1) Sasuke truly is willing to let her die if it furthers his goals, and 2) she wants to save him anyway.

She has no intention of pursuing Sasuke romantically. She knows full well that Sasuke isn’t interested in her. She even knows that Sasuke isn’t really on their side (there’s a great scene where Sai questions Sakura about Sasuke’s return, and she reassures him that everything is fine, and Sai sadly thinks to himself “even I can tell your smile is fake”). She’s well-aware that Sasuke didn’t try to help her when Madara stabbed her. She’s well-aware that he left her to die in the lava pit. She’s also well-aware that none of this is enough to make her stop loving him. He doesn’t have to care about her - she still cares about him. She still wants to help him. She still wants to save him.

This is not hidden, hard-to-parse character development. It’s explicitly articulated on the page:

Sakura’s not trying or wanting to make you hers! She only wants to save you.

I’m not sure if people look at this last confrontation and unquestioningly take Sasuke at his word (as if we haven’t just read 71 volumes/watched 700 episodes showing us how how painfully distorted his thinking is), or if they stop reading/watching before the end of the scene, or if they don’t understand that Sasuke saying something doesn’t make that statement an accurate representation of reality. The entire point of this scene is to show us how deeply mistaken Sasuke is about Sakura (and, by extension, the rest of Team 7). He’s locked into a false pattern of thinking. His single-minded focus on revenge and destruction has blinded him to the unconditional love his friends feel for him; he’s become so accustomed to using others and being used that he can’t understand or accept that someone would care about him without needing a reason, without needing him to love them back, without needing to receive something from him in exchange.

Sakura’s not trying or wanting to make you hers! She only wants to save you.

Sasuke matters to Sakura as more than a love interest. He always has. She does love him romantically, yes, but she doesn’t only love him romantically, and her desire to help him is not and has never been contingent on him returning her feelings, romantically or otherwise. Sasuke isn’t able to acknowledge that in this scene, but that doesn’t mean we’re supposed to just sit back and agree with his warped perspective. Kakashi is the one who’s explicitly positioned as the voice of the narrative here. We, as the audience, are supposed to recognize that Kakashi is the one telling us the truth.

[tangential thing 1: You don’t have to love Sakura's last plea to Sasuke here. It’s not my favorite, either - the best part, other than Kakashi’s speech at the end, is the moment after Kakashi collapses when Sakura’s expression changes from pained uncertainty to pure rage, when she grits her teeth together - when I first saw that, I almost leapt out of my seat like “Oh my god. She’s finally going to let him have it. It’s finally happening - ” I wanted that so badly, and I still think it would have been a more effective writing choice for Sakura’s last words to lean more into her anger at the suffering Sasuke is causing all of them (himself included!) and less into yet another of Kishimoto’s “let me have Sakura articulate what a shame it is that she can’t do as much as Naruto despite the fact that I literally just went through a major reveal sequence in the war to show that she’s caught up to the boys; I can’t make up my mind about whether I want her to progress or not” - it’s extremely frustrating (and it's something he does at the very end of the S10 Team 7 reunion, too, which is the ONLY moment of S10 that falls flat for me). But at the same time, even if there are ways this sequence could be more satisfying, it doesn’t change the fact that her plea to him is not remotely motivated by a desire to be with him romantically and not anything to condemn her for.]

[tangential thing 2: I do like how she remembers that moment when Sasuke says “Thank you.” That panel precedes her saying “If there’s even a tiny corner of your heart that thinks about me…” (which I’m sure is one of the things that people like to criticize about this scene, aka “oh she’s sooooo self-centered” etc), but that particular line of dialogue is preceded by that particular flashback panel for a reason: Sakura knows that Sasuke DOES think about her. He thinks about all of them. Sakura remembers that “thank you,” and it reminds her that despite everything Sasuke has done and said since, despite all evidence to the contrary, she knows in her bones that his expression of gratitude back then was genuine. He cared about her once. He cared about all of them. She’s trying to reach the part of him that still does, if it exists.]

[tangential thing 3: The fact that Kakashi says “she suffers from loving you,” and it triggers Sasuke to remember his own family - thinking about how much he suffered (and still suffers) from loving them - “Perhaps…those are the ties to a failed past” - the idea that it’s not worth it to have bonds if it means you suffer this much…that it’s too difficult, it’s too painful, and if Sakura and the rest of Team 7 were smarter they would just give it up (all Sasuke knows how to do now is sever potential bonds before they can hurt him; so why aren’t Sakura and the rest of his teammates doing that, why can’t they let it go, why are they making this so hard - ) << yeah, he clearly doesn't care about her/them at all.]

4. the shadow of my family

This has all been a really long way to answer the original question, but the short response to “What do you think about the relationship between Sasuke and Sakura?” is “I really care about it,” just like I really care about the relationship between Sasuke and Naruto, just like I really care about the relationship between Sasuke and Kakashi. And I don’t think the story ever asks me to choose between them.

I’m not sure whether it’s the impact of Boruto-era “canon” that gets in the way of other people approaching things this way (I don’t consider sequel material when I evaluate the original story), or if it’s Kishimoto’s frequent disinterest in/disrespect towards female characters, which yes, does sometimes make it harder, or if it's a shipping thing (bane of my existence), or some combination of factors, but for me, taking one member of Team 7 out of the equation hobbles the rest of the story. I can’t read/watch Naruto while hating one of the protagonists and loving the other three. It doesn’t work like that for me. The story wasn’t written that way, and there’s nothing in the text that would cause me to receive it that way.

That doesn't mean there's anything wrong with disliking one of the main foursome (or any character, for that matter) - obviously we're all going to have different preferences, and everyone is free to enjoy or reject whatever parts of a story they want, or to like or dislike whatever characters they want. I know that some people have more fun disregarding canon and doing their own thing, which is fine. My own personal zone of enjoyment comes from receiving the story as closely to how I think it was intended to be read as I can, and personally, when I look at this particular story, what I see is that all the members of Team 7 clearly demonstrate their love for Sasuke in ways that he himself later recognizes and acknowledges. All of them are driven by their desire to save him and their unwillingness to hurt him. All of them make repeated choices to chase after him when he runs away, to trust him when he hasn't exactly earned it, to give him another chance when he doesn't appear to deserve it. ALL of them, not just Naruto, do these things multiple times throughout the story, and Sasuke owes his life (and thus his eventual recovery) to ALL of them, many times over. Kakashi disobeys Hokage-elect Danzō and breaks the law to negotiate for Sasuke's life with a foreign head of state. Sakura and Kakashi both have opportunities to kill Sasuke in the Land of Iron, and they choose to spare him instead. Kakashi stops Sasuke from killing his only friends at two different points in the story, which would have been a mistake Sasuke couldn't have recovered from. Sasuke would have died in Kaguya's desert dimension if Sakura hadn't saved him (Sakura, who knew that Sasuke wasn't even truly on her side yet, who knew he'd abandoned her for dead multiple times already that day). Kaguya's bone bullet would have killed Sasuke too, if Kakashi, with his intention to die in Sasuke's place, hadn't leapt in front of it (Kakashi, who also knew that Sasuke wasn't fully on their side yet, who also knew that Sasuke had abandoned him for dead earlier that day). Sasuke and Naruto would have BOTH died in the Final Valley if Sakura and a severely injured Kakashi hadn't chased after them to heal their injuries.

Remove any one member of Team 7, and Sasuke never makes it home. Without the combined efforts of all three of his teammates, he doesn't survive. That’s the way it should be, thematically, for a story whose first and most foundational premise was the importance of teamwork, and since Sakura was just as essential to that framework as everyone else, I’m just as invested in her relationship with Sasuke as I am in his relationship with everyone else. You can’t remove one leg from a four-legged stool without damaging the integrity of the entire structure, and for me, discounting any single member of Team 7 irreparably damages the integrity of the entire story.

TL;DR: I love all of the Team 7 relationships, including Sakura and Sasuke's, because despite what some segments of fandom seem to believe, the text of the story never gives me any reason not to.

#naruto #meta #replies #anyway that's that! hopefully that is a helpful answer #thank you for the question! i honestly don't think i would have ever gotten around to writing about this if i hadn't been directly asked #i love talking about the stories i enjoy (obviously; we all do; that's why we're here)#but i'm usually ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ about responding to takes that blatantly misread the narrative to justify hating a particular character or ship #mostly because a) it's whatever. as long as people mind their own business and leave me to enjoy myself they can do what they want #and b) some opinions are so divorced from the actual text that they're not worth discussing #like. what's the point of responding to random internet posts saying that sakura was selfishly pursuing sasuke as a lover the entire time #when that is textually and provably not the case?#if you're that committed to experiencing things in direct contradiction to what the narrative is asking of us then just go ahead #is it mildly annoying to me? sure. but so are lots of things and it's better to just let stuff go #like - i initially planned to take this piece of meta all the way up through sakura and sasuke's last scene together #the one where he tells her 'maybe next time' and finally reclaims and redefines itachi's forehead tap (INCREDIBLE. THIS SCENE.)#but ultimately i changed my mind because everything i wrote for that last section was coming out too harsh #i generally prefer to talk about fandom stuff in a chill/friendly approachable way #but i kept thinking about the most obscenely & disrespectfully inaccurate read of that scene i'd ever seen #and i couldn't figure out how to talk about it in a non-scathing way #that scene and the one where naruto gives sasuke's headband back are the ONLY well-written things about the finale of naruto #they are SO perfectly constructed and i can't respond to people slandering either one without feeling an urge to kill #so i just deleted it. partially because again - this is fandom; it's not that serious; people can do what they want #but also because i know i get extra frustrated about people picking over the text and plucking out isolated bits and pieces #to contort into blatantly misinterpreted mutant shapes that 'confirm' whatever pre-existing judgments or ships they had #instead of experiencing the story as a cohesive whole & keeping in mind the greater context of what it's always been trying to communicate #people on this website say 'we all interpret things differently :)' as if it means no one can ever be wrong about what a text is saying #newsflash: not all interpretations of a text are valid. things can't in fact mean whatever you want them to mean.#the ***story*** persists and exists even if the author is dead to you #if you choose to ignore that then that's fine; it's just fandom; who cares. but i'm not going to pretend you're 'analyzing' anything.#(ok now i'm really done. you can see why i deleted this section XD)

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