#but one can never have too many historical au's! so that one still very well may happen x

[colgatebluemintygel]

hiya toothpaste darling! was having a lil room clean this evening whilst watching some p&p and thinking about how much i adore a period piece and did i .. did i dream that you are writing an r/s one? did i make that up i just tried to search your blog for those wip thingies but one cute thing about this hellsite is their tag searcher simply . Does Not Work :) anyway this is long sorry hello good morning (??) how are you! kisses! xoxoxo

HIIII HELLO lovely lovely mads <3 good morning/afternoon/evening! how do you do!! i am good i am grand i am very sleepy (like remus) - my cat released a live rat :-(( under my bed last night. so that was hell. poor wee scabbers2 (i managed to save the lil guy tho. all is well!) hope you are SWELL <3

I AM writing a period fic! a regency au in fact; it was not a hallucination! tumblr's tagging system does suck but i do not make it easier. but i'm soooo glad you asked!!!! i’m so super excited about this one :o) let me tell you all about it xoxo

the dating season is about to start! which sirius finds so very dull and silly and uninteresting. he has a reputation for being a rake, but in actuality he just spends his time at his giant estate brooding and writing poetry + emotionally charged erotica. he wants love :-( but people only seem to want him for his money (and because he's hot) (but mostly for the money)

and SO! the dating season! ........ enter remus lupin! who was a childhood friend of sirius and james' that mysteriously disappeared without a trace 5ish years ago! just after he and sirius kissed for the first time :-o and sirius has been predictably Hung Up on him ever since. (readers have noted that themes of regret and lost love seem to be at the forefront madam puddifoot's (....hhaha) poetry. and in her erotic novels, the lovers never get more than one night together!). but remus is here to marry :-( to make a match! marriage is very much an economic proposition for him *cue amy's iconic speech* and sirius thinks it's all bullshit. and so remus goes on lots of dates! and sirius sabotages all of them :-)))

MWAH xxx

[edenesth]

TWTHH Spinoff: Try Again [1]

Pairing: assistant!Jongho x new maid!reader

AU: historical au (Joseon era)

Word Count: 5.4k

Summary: Among the many staff members at General Park's estate, Jongho stood out for his dedication, leaving no room for personal indulgence. Convinced that love and marriage would detract from his commitment to serving the general, he had resigned himself to a life of solitude. But his conviction was challenged with the arrival of an annoyingly perfect Miss Kwon, a new maid whose kindness and efficiency began to make him rethink his life choices.

A/N: As stated in the title, this is a spinoff. If you have yet to check out the main story, it's probably better to read that before starting this.

Main Story | Spinoff Masterlist | Part 2

"So, that's her?" Jongho asked, raising a sceptical brow as he scrutinised you from a distance. The head maid nodded beside him. "Yes, that's Miss Kwon, highly recommended by many noblewomen across Joseon for her exceptional skills in caring for pregnant women and newborns. Do you… not approve of her? The mistress has already met her and seemed very pleased."

The general's assistant shook his head. "It's not that. I just… didn't expect her to be this young. I thought experts in this field were usually, well, middle-aged women."

Eunsook chuckled. "You're not wrong about that, Jongho, but Miss Kwon is different. Some people are just born talented, and it seems she's one of them."

"Hm, we'll see about that."

Jongho didn't want to be overly suspicious, but he couldn't help being cautious about new people, especially those coming to work at the estate for Seonghwa. With the general's wealth and status came many threats and people with various intentions, so he could never be too careful about who got close. Since you would not only join the household as a regular maid but also as the mistress' personal caretaker, you would inevitably have many opportunities to attempt something if you wanted to.

Sure, Eunsook claimed you were an expert in this particular field, but those were just words. He needed to see it to believe it, and for the next few months, he vowed to keep a close eye on you to ensure you were here purely for work and nothing else.

I'm watching you, Kwon.

"I promise, my lord. I will do my absolute best to take care of Lady Park and the future young master or miss. It would be my greatest honour to serve you and your family. My past employers can vouch for me if you wish. I am still in touch with most of them and can arrange for you to speak with them if you would like testimonies—"

General Park halted your rehearsed speech with a raised hand, an intimidating grin serving as a warning. "I appreciate it, Miss Kwon. But there's no need for that. My wife is adamant about having you care for her and our child. The choice is not in my hands, but I will say this: I am not a simple man, and I’m sure you are aware of that. If you attempt anything suspicious, the consequences will not be pretty. This is nothing against you; just know that every member of my staff has had to prove their trustworthiness."

You nodded firmly, fully understanding his caution. "Absolutely, sir. I understand completely. You have every reason to be careful, but rest assured, I will prove myself worthy. Thank you for granting me the opportunity to work for the lovely Lady Park."

True to your words, you lived up to expectations. If anything, Seonghwa would say you exceeded them. Your dedication and expertise quickly became apparent as you cared for the mistress with unwavering attention. Your knowledge of herbal remedies and gentle demeanour provided immense comfort to her during her pregnancy. The household buzzed with praise for you, and it didn’t take long for nearly everyone in the estate to like you. Even the general, known for his high standards, was impressed by your commitment and skill.

However, there was one person who remained at a distance—Jongho. Despite the praise you received from everyone else, the assistant maintained what he called a "professional distance." He watched you with a critical eye, always analysing, always assessing. While the rest of the staff warmed to your presence, he seemed determined to keep you at arm’s length.

You noticed his behaviour—it was hard not to—but didn’t let it deter you. You continued to perform your duties with the same level of dedication and kindness. Lady Park's condition improved steadily under your care, and the household ran smoothly. Your interactions with the other staff were friendly and respectful, and you often found yourself in the kitchen sharing a laugh with Eunsook or helping the junior maids with their tasks.

One evening, as you were preparing a soothing herbal tea for the mistress in the kitchen, you felt someone's gaze on you. You looked up to find Jongho passing by the doorway, his expression unreadable—the way it always was whenever he was around you. Your eyes followed him until he was out of sight. With a sigh, you shook your head and returned to your task.

Hearing the sigh, the head maid came up beside you. "What is it, dearie? You okay?"

You shrugged. "I don't know, Eunsook. I think… I think Assistant Choi dislikes me. It's been a month since I started work, and I'm well acquainted with nearly everyone in the estate… except him. I tried, I really did, but he just somehow refuses to let me in."

Eunsook gave you a sympathetic smile. "Don't take it to heart, Miss Kwon. Jongho is like that with everyone at first. He's very protective of the general and the household. It’s not personal."

You sighed again, stirring the tea gently. "I understand his caution, but it can be... disheartening. I just want to do my job well and be part of the team."

The elderly woman patted your shoulder reassuringly. "Give it time. He's a tough nut to crack, but once he sees your dedication, he'll come around. Just keep doing what you're doing. Everyone else has already seen how wonderful you are, and he will too."

You nodded, feeling a bit more hopeful. "Thank you, Eunsook. I'll keep trying."

With that, you finished preparing the tea and carried it to the House of Lotus, determined to prove yourself not just to the household, but eventually, even to the distant assistant.

But that might not be as easy as you thought. You should have known better. Your usual fail-proof plan to befriend someone had, for once, failed you. Offering help has always been your best way to connect with people. This time, however, it seemed to have backfired.

"Here's my chance," you mumbled to yourself as you spotted Jongho exiting the general's study, balancing a huge pile of scrolls in his arms. The stack was so high that he had to use his peripheral vision to navigate.

"Oh! Assistant Choi, please let me help!" you exclaimed, bounding over to him, your hands reaching for some of the scrolls at the top, which were obscuring his view. But before you could even touch them, he turned away from you and growled.

"No, thank you. I don't recall asking for your help. Please step aside."

When you opened your mouth to insist, he shot you a stern glare, sneering, "Instead of poking your nose into others' business, I'd suggest you do what you were hired to do. Good day, Miss Kwon."

Damn, what's his deal?

Stunned and a bit hurt, you stepped back, watching as he continued on his way, the scrolls wobbling precariously. You sighed, realising that winning him over would be more challenging than you had anticipated. Determined not to let this setback discourage you, you reminded yourself of Eunsook's words and resolved to keep trying. After all, perseverance and patience had always been your strengths, and you were not about to give up now.

Jongho huffed, rushing off to deliver the scrolls to Royal Secretary Choi as he always did. This wasn't a new task, and he certainly did not need any help. He wasn't a child; if anything, he was the general's most trusted aide for a good reason. If he needed assistance, he wouldn't be in his current position. How foolish of you to think you could charm your way to him just like that. He wasn't like the rest and wouldn't fall so easily. He knew he wasn't usually this harsh with other newcomers, but there was a reason for that.

Truthfully, he felt bitter.

People like him and Eunsook had to work so hard for many years to prove themselves, to get to where they were, to be acknowledged by all the estate staff. Yet here you were, freshly joined, and already you had everyone smitten and wrapped around your little finger. Just who did you think you were? He refused to believe you were as perfect as everyone made you out to be. Surely, you were flawed somewhere, and he was determined to find that flaw.

As he strode down the hallway, Jongho's mind raced with thoughts of you. He remembered the countless hours he had spent earning the trust and respect of the general and the other senior staff members, especially back when Seonghwa was neither kind nor forgiving. It had been a gruelling process, filled with challenges and sacrifices. And now, watching you seamlessly integrate into the household, seemingly without effort, grated on his nerves.

He arrived at San's office, carefully setting down the scrolls. The secretary glanced up, nodding in acknowledgement. "Everything alright, my man? You look a little bothered." Jongho took a deep breath and nodded, keeping his poker face intact, trying to shake off the irritation that clung to him. "I'm fine."

On his way back, he couldn't help but replay the earlier encounter in his mind. Your earnest offer to help, your genuine concern—it all felt too convenient, too perfect. He didn't trust it. No one could be that flawless, especially not someone so new to the estate.

Determined, the assistant resolved to keep a closer watch on you. He would observe your every move, waiting for the moment you slipped up, for the crack in your perfect facade. Only then would he feel vindicated in his mistrust. Until that day, he would remain vigilant, never letting his guard down.

And so, the silent battle continued.

You, with your unwavering kindness and dedication, and Choi Jongho, with his relentless scrutiny and scepticism. Little did he know, this ongoing clash would shape both of your lives in ways neither of you could foresee.

"Well, are things any better now?" Lady Park asked as you massaged her shoulders, which were stiff from hours of embroidering. Lord, this woman really needed to indulge in the activity in moderation.

You blinked. "Hm? Are you asking me that question, my lady?"

She chuckled. “If not you, who else? It's just us here, silly.”

You furrowed your brows. "I’m afraid I don't follow. What exactly are you referring to? My work here? It's going great, and you already know that—"

She clucked her tongue, rolled her eyes, and turned to face you. "I can't tell if you’re genuinely dense or just playing dumb with me, Miss Kwon. I'm talking about Jongho, of course. You’ve been trying to befriend him, haven't you?"

Your jaw dropped. "H-how'd you—"

She crossed her arms over her chest. "Did you really think Eunsook would keep anything from me, hm?"

You sighed, a bit embarrassed. "I just… didn't want to trouble you with it, my lady. It's nothing serious."

The mistress gave you a knowing look. "It might not seem serious to you, but it affects the atmosphere in the household. Jongho can be… difficult, but he means well. Have you made any progress?"

You shook your head. "Not really. He's very guarded, and every time I try to help or get close, he pushes me away. It's frustrating."

She smiled softly. "Give it time, Miss Kwon. Jongho has his reasons for being the way he is. He's had to work hard to earn his place and is wary of anyone new. Just be patient and continue doing your best. He’ll come around eventually, I know it."

You nodded, feeling a bit more hopeful. "Thank you. I'll keep trying."

Lady Park patted your hand. "Good. Now, enough about Jongho. Tell me more about these herbs you use. They've been working wonders for my headaches."

You smiled, glad to shift the conversation to something more pleasant, and began explaining the different herbs and their benefits to pregnant women like herself.

In the short time you had been at the estate, the mistress already felt like an elder sister to you. For once, it was nice to feel genuinely cared for. Growing up in a family where sons were favoured, being the only girl and a middle child among five siblings was challenging. Your parents had always focused on your four brothers, leaving you neglected and constantly chasing after their affection and acknowledgement. When none came, you had left home as soon as you were old enough—not that anyone cared or noticed. For all you knew, they could have been cheering on the inside.

On your journey to find your own path, fate intervened in the form of a woman going into labour in the middle of a busy street. Without a second thought, you rushed to assist her, drawing from the little knowledge you had gained from witnessing your mother give birth to your fourth and fifth brothers, along with some information from books about the female body and childbirth you had picked up out of curiosity. Naturally, you safely helped deliver the woman's baby after escorting her to a kind-hearted merchant's store nearby.

The townspeople who witnessed the event were amazed by your talent. Almost immediately, you were hired to assist with more births. With each case you took on, your expertise grew, and your name spread throughout the community.

Now, here you were, hired by the great General Park of the Joseon Royal Army to care for his beloved wife. While you had worked for many noble families before, this was undoubtedly the most prestigious addition to your portfolio.

Lady Park smiled as you described the different herbs and their benefits. "You have such a wealth of knowledge, Miss Kwon. It’s clear why you come so highly recommended."

You blushed slightly, appreciating her kind words. "Thank you, my lady. It's been a journey to get here, and you have no idea how honoured I am to be in your service."

She squeezed your hand. "And we're lucky to have you. Keep doing your best. Jongho... will come around in time, trust me, and soon enough, you’ll feel truly at home here."

Despite the challenges with the assistant, you were determined not to let him stand in the way of proving yourself in the household. This opportunity with the Park family was the pinnacle of your career so far, and you were determined to make the most of it.

"I'm so sorry to interrupt your session, mistress, but this is rather urgent. Miss Kwon, Assistant Choi has requested your presence at the inventory," a maid called out.

Speak of the devil.

Your eyes widened in surprise as you pointed to yourself. "M-me? Are you sure?" The maid nodded, a teasing grin on her face. "Yes, you." Everyone had noticed your efforts to get close to the assistant, so your reaction was understandable.

With a gentle pat on your hand, the mistress nodded toward the exit of her quarters. "No worries at all, dear. Go on then, he's waiting."

Gathering your composure, you followed the maid and made your way to the storeroom. As you arrived, you saw Jongho and Eunsook amidst piles of supplies, meticulously checking off items on their lists. He glanced up at you and gave a slight nod as acknowledgement, his expression as emotionless as ever.

"Miss Kwon, it's good that you're here. We're finalising our inventory check. Eunsook and I have settled the rest, but we need your expertise for the maternity essentials. Please have a look and let us know what isn't sufficient," the general's aide said, his tone formal and business-like.

You nodded and moved towards the designated area for the maternity supplies. Carefully, you inspected each item, making mental notes of what was present and what was missing. Your hands moved methodically through the various herbs and preparations until you noticed a glaring absence.

"Oh dear, it seems we're lacking the Fenugreek, Black Cohosh, and Raspberry Leaf. These herbs are essential as the delivery date is nearing," you remarked, turning to the two senior staff members.

Assistant Choi's eyes narrowed slightly, his focus entirely on you. "Is it critical? Funny how Physician Jung never mentioned these."

"Yes, very much so. We can't afford to be without them. Physician Jung is a general medical practitioner, but I specialise in this field. I hope you understand," you affirmed, suppressing the slight anger you felt at his sceptical and accusatory tone.

With a raised brow and a defeated nod, he made a decision. "Fine. We’ll need to procure them immediately. Miss Kwon, you will accompany me to the market."

You blinked in surprise. "There's no need for that. I can go alone, Assistant Choi. I know exactly where to find it."

Jongho's expression hardened. "I do not trust you to complete this task alone. I'll accompany you. Now, let us make haste."

Gosh, this man is exhausting.

Reluctantly, you nodded and followed him out of the storeroom. Eunsook gave you a playful fist pump, wishing you luck, and you responded with a half-hearted pout. The carriage ride to the market was tense, the air thick with unspoken tension. You sat quietly in one corner while he occupied the opposite end, his attention fixed on the parchment detailing their shopping list. Every attempt you made to break the ice was met with a stern glare, his eyes daring you to disturb the uneasy silence.

Biting your lip, you couldn't stand the oppressive quiet any longer. Clearing your throat, you began, "Um… so, do you… um, have you been to this market often?"

His gaze snapped up, cold and piercing. "It doesn't matter. Let's just focus on the task at hand," he replied curtly, his voice sharp.

You flinched at his tone, instantly regretting your attempt at conversation. Folding your hands in your lap, you turned to gaze out the carriage window, the passing scenery a blur as you pondered how to navigate this journey without further upsetting him.

Once at the market, Jongho's vigilance became apparent as he kept a sharp eye on your surroundings, seemingly ensuring your safety. To your surprise, he took precautions like guiding you to walk on the inside of the road and positioning himself slightly behind you, vigilant against potential threats from passing carriages or lurking thieves. Despite his usual stern demeanour, his actions revealed a decency you hadn't expected.

"Careful, watch your step. Ignore them and go straight ahead," his voice sounded from behind you. You felt the ghost of his touch on your back, his hand hovering near your waist as he shielded you from a rowdy group of drunken men sauntering around in broad daylight. Your heart skipped a beat at the proximity, and you nodded wordlessly, afraid that speaking might reveal the flustered state he had caused. His presence made you feel oddly safe, a feeling you hadn't anticipated experiencing around him.

As you navigated through the crowded market, his vigilance never wavered. He steered you away from potential dangers, his eyes constantly scanning the surroundings. When you reached the apothecary, he took the lead, ensuring you were well-protected.

"Is this it?" he asked, looking at the apothecary you frequented. You nodded, and he folded the parchment, stowing it back in his bag. "You know, we could've gone to Ryu's Apothecary. Yunho's fiancée— I mean Miss Ryu, she would've given us a discount."

You sighed softly. "Yes, but they won't have what we need. These herbs are different and rare, specifically used during labour. This apothecary is the only one I know that supplies them. Just trust me on this."

"Fine, let's go," he grumbled, his tone still gruff but less dismissive.

At the apothecary, his negotiating skills came to the fore. "Thanks, we'll take them," you quickly accepted the price offered as usual, but Jongho stepped in, handling the transaction with sharp precision.

"Before we agree so hastily, I believe it's important that we try to negotiate," he muttered, gently moving you aside from the counter. Just as you were about to protest, his persuasive mannerisms took over, and before you knew it, he had managed to secure a lower price.

"And that's how you do it, Miss Kwon."

"Y-yes, Assistant Choi."

On your way back to the estate, you couldn't help but reflect on the day's events. Despite his cold exterior, the assistant's professionalism was undeniable. His vigilance and the way he ensured the efficiency of the task had impressed you.

You finally witnessed firsthand his meticulous attention to detail and sharp negotiating skills. He had secured the necessary herbs at a reasonable price, demonstrating a keen understanding of the market and a commitment to obtaining the best for his employer. It was the first time since joining the general's estate that you had seen his capabilities in action. Previously, you had only heard about how dedicated he was to every single detail, but today, you saw him in a new light. With that came a growing respect and admiration for his attitude towards his work.

Upon returning, you handed the herb to the head maid for storage and turned to Jongho. "Thank you. Your help was invaluable today."

He merely nodded, his expression unreadable. "Just doing my job. Make sure everything is in order."

Despite his continued aloofness, you had gained a newfound respect for him. His commitment to the household was undeniable, and you admired him for it. His cold exterior had masked a fierce sense of duty. You realised that, despite his stern demeanour, he took his responsibilities seriously and was just doing everything in his power to ensure the well-being of the household.

Back in your quarters that evening, you sat by the window, looking out at the fading light. The day's events had given you a new perspective on Assistant Choi. You had seen a side of him that was hidden beneath layers of formality and distance. His actions had spoken volumes about his character, and you found that a rather... attractive trait.

Hmm, maybe he's not all that bad.

Your admiration for him only seemed to grow after an emergency one night at the estate. A severe storm had wreaked havoc, causing significant damage to various parts of the property. The wind howled, and the rain poured down in torrents, leaving broken windows, fallen trees, and a flooded courtyard in its wake. Immediate repairs and organisation were required, and you found yourself working alongside Jongho to coordinate the repair efforts.

"We need to assess the damage and allocate tasks to the repair teams immediately," he said, his tone sharp but calm as he surveyed the chaos around him. His usual stern demeanour was replaced with a focused intensity, like a man on a mission.

You nodded, grabbing a lantern and following him through the rain-soaked grounds. "Careful!" he exclaimed, his hands shooting out to steady you when you yelped, nearly slipping on the wet ground. "Th-thanks, I'm fine. I'll be more careful from now on," you stuttered, feeling flustered by his warm, large hands on your shoulders.

For a fleeting moment, time seemed to freeze as you both locked eyes. His gaze was intense, revealing a depth you hadn't noticed before. Suddenly aware of his touch, he cleared his throat and promptly released his hold. "Right, let's go. No time to waste."

With the urgency of the situation pressing on him, the assistant wasted no time dwelling on what had just happened. He moved with purpose, his eyes scanning for damage while directing the staff with precision. Teams were swiftly assigned to clear debris, patch up broken windows, and start pumping out water from flooded areas. His leadership remained steadfast, and he willingly joined in wherever his assistance was needed.

"Over here! This tree needs to be cleared right away. It’s blocking the main path," Jongho called out, rolling up his sleeves and picking up an axe himself. You watched in awe as he swung the tool with practised ease, chipping away at the fallen tree. His relentless work ethic was evident in every action, showing no sign of fatigue even as the hours dragged on.

"Here, let me help with that," you offered, stepping forward.

He glanced at you briefly, a rare flicker of appreciation in his eyes. "Focus on coordinating the teams. I need you to ensure everyone is where they need to be."

You nodded, feeling a renewed sense of purpose. You ran from one team to another, relaying his instructions and ensuring the work was progressing smoothly. Every time you returned to his side, he was still working tirelessly, whether it was hauling debris, directing the repair crews, or inspecting the work that had been done.

As the night wore on and the storm began to subside, you noticed that he seemed to have caught a cold from working in the rain all night. Constant coughs and sneezes escaped him, but he ignored them and continued his work with undiminished intensity.

"Jongho, you need to take a break," you said, your eyes widening when you realised you had called him by his name instead of his title. Your heart raced, preparing for the lecture that was sure to come, but there was none. He merely wiped his forehead with his hanbok sleeve, shaking his head.

"I'm fine. There's no time for that."

His tireless work ethic left a lasting impression on you, making you see beyond his exterior. And in that moment, you realised there was much more to Assistant Choi than met the eye.

By the time the first light of dawn began to break, the major repairs were completed. The estate, though still showing signs of the storm's wrath, was well on its way to recovery. You and the assistant stood in the courtyard, muddy and exhausted, but there was a sense of accomplishment in the air.

"You've worked hard today, Jongho. You must be exhausted," you said, your voice filled with genuine concern.

He merely nodded, his usual aloofness returning. "I'm sure we all are. But we're far from finished; there's still more work to be done. Make sure the teams are ready for the next phase."

Despite his continued formality, you couldn't help but feel a deep respect for him. His actions that night had spoken volumes about his character, revealing a dedication and decency that you found truly admirable. As you returned to your quarters, you felt a newfound determination to prove yourself to him, hoping that one day he might see you as an ally rather than an outsider.

But it won't be easy.

On the other side of the servant's quarters, Jongho lay awake in bed, struggling to push the memory of you saying his name out of his mind. He was angry at himself for not correcting you; he didn't like how his heart was starting to react around you. Despite the cold front he put up, he couldn't stop thinking about your bright personality and your infuriatingly cheerful smile.

He would rather die than admit to anyone he enjoyed the impromptu trip to the market with you, enjoyed having you close as you walked down the busy streets together, and enjoyed feeling what it was like to have someone to protect. Was this how Seonghwa felt around the mistress? No, no, he could not afford to think like this.

Unlike the general, he had nothing to offer.

For the longest time, he was convinced that his purpose lay solely in his service. But then you came along and just had to mess things up. You were everything Jongho was not: warm, approachable, and seemingly unruffled by the complexities of life. Your kindness and efficiency quickly won you favour among the staff, and your presence brought a refreshing vibrancy to the estate.

He often watched you from a distance, his initial curiosity soon giving way to annoyance. How could someone so young and inexperienced be so... perfect? You were always so nice, so sweet, so helpful, a stark contrast to his own brusque demeanour. And worse, you seemed to take a special interest in him. He wasn't an idiot; he could tell you were going out of your way to offer assistance and engage in conversation. He couldn't understand it. He didn't want to understand it. He had no time for such distractions.

Yet, despite his best efforts to ignore you, he found himself watching you more often, his eyes drawn to your easy smiles and the way you moved with such graceful efficiency. He hated the way his thoughts strayed to you, disrupting his focus. He hated the way his heart seemed to betray him, beating a little faster whenever you were near.

As he lay there, he replayed the events of the night in his mind over and over. You had called him by his name, and he let it slide. He should have corrected you and maintained the distance that was necessary for both of your sakes. But he didn't. Instead, he found himself yearning for more moments like that, where the walls between you seemed a little less solid.

"Jongho, you need to take a break."

He could still hear the concern in your voice and see the worry in your eyes. It was unnerving, to say the least. The assistant was used to being the one who took care of things, the one who ensured everything ran smoothly. Having someone care about him was a new, unsettling experience.

Enough, Choi Jongho. Stop this nonsense.

Determined to regain control, he went to great lengths to avoid you in the days that followed. He needed to reclaim his composure and restore the once-existent distance between you. His job was what mattered, and he had to focus on it.

Not you.

Already irritated by the unwelcome feelings you had stirred, the combination of sleep deprivation and his lingering cold only exacerbated his mood, leaving him increasingly irritable. No one dared to disturb him, sensing his foul mood.

The final straw came when he heard your voice. "There you are! I've been searching for you. Here are some Echinacea. It's good for your cold. You really should do something about it before it worsens."

Taking a deep breath, he turned to face you.

"Why do you keep doing this?" Jongho demanded, his voice harsher than he intended. "I don't need your help. I don't need you."

He had been organising the general's study one afternoon when you approached him with a small bundle of herbs, a remedy you had prepared for the minor ailment he had been ignoring. You handed it to him with a gentle smile, your eyes filled with genuine concern. Instead of reacting gratefully, his patience snapped.

Your smile faltered, but you held his gaze steadily. "I'm only trying to help, Jongho. You work so hard, and I thought—"

"Don't think, Miss Kwon," he cut you off, his tone icy. "Just do your job and leave me alone. And it's Assistant Choi to you."

For a moment, hurt flashed across your face, but you quickly masked it with a polite nod. "I understand. I apologise if I've overstepped."

Jongho watched you walk away, a strange emptiness settling in his chest. He had done what he needed to do, what he always did—push people away. Yet, for the first time, he felt a pang of regret.

Forget her. You did the right thing.

« Preview of Part 2 »

"You know, if she runs away or hands in her resignation letter because of you, I'll have you know there will be serious consequences for you." The general's deep voice startled his assistant, who was in the midst of dusting his bookshelves—or at least attempting to, as his mind was clearly elsewhere.

Seonghwa sighed. "I'm kidding, but I heard everything, you idiot. Care to tell me why you're being unusually harsh to her? We've had new people join before, and you've never acted like this."

To the older man's dismay, Jongho remained silent, unsure of how to respond. His usual sharp retorts were absent for once.

"You like her, don't you?" General Park asked.

The guilty look in the younger man's eyes was all it took to confirm the question. Seonghwa chuckled, smacking him on the back. "That's it? Why are you acting like it's the end of the world? Isn't this great? You finally found someone you like!"

"That's the problem, sir. I don't want this. I don't want any of it."

Hmm this didn't feel as emotionally damaging as promised, did it? Idek HAHA I honestly cannot tell, y'all let me know. You're probably surprised I dropped this on a Monday but it's another public holiday for us Malaysians today, yippee!

Thank you for reading and hope you enjoyed! As always, let me know your thoughts! <3

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All Rights Reserved © edenesth // DO NOT REPOST, TRANSLATE, PLAGIARISE OR REPURPOSE.

[asunflowerana]

Salmon - Inumaki Toge

summary: you always wanted to meet your soulmate; you just didn't thought he would have to save your life along the way.

warnings: soulmate!au, comedy, curse appearance (nothing frightening), and some good old fluff.

“Finish your soup, _____, you don't want to faint in front of your soulmate.” Says your grandmother, trying to persuade you to eat another portion of her still-warm pumpkin with ginger soup.

She’s been using this tactic since you were four, and to her delight, sooner or later you’d end up lifting your spoon and serving your empty bowl again. You can’t help your heart’s greatest desire, yearning for the day you’ll finally find the person who, according to other people’s experiences, will brighten up your whole world.

It sounds almost like something out of a fairytale, your destiny tied to someone especially made it to love you. To be honest, you wouldn’t believe it if it weren’t for the bold letters embedded on your wrist since the beginning of your life. The “soulmate brand”, as your grandmother once explained — the literal first words your soulmate will say to you. Each person has it somewhere on their skin, and nothing, absolutely nothing, can erase it, as the mark is part of your entire being as much as your beating heart is. 

“Will you grant me this dance? ” is your grandma’s brand, the first words your grandfather said to her after gazing for a long time at the prettiest woman he has ever seen around the neighborhood festivals.

And the brands are varied, but they usually make sense for a first meeting, from simple “Hi” and “Excuse me”s, to “Would you like some coffee?”. Well, most of them are understandable, but there are some not-very-funny cases, like yours, that they’re completely senseless.

“Salmon” hides under the long sleeve of your shirt. 

What does “salmon” have to do with all this? Why not something simpler, like a “nice to meet you”?

You’ve created so many theories over time, trying to find a logical scenario where this would be a first-thing sentence. Maybe your future partner is a cook, and he’ll prepare you a Baked Salmon; or maybe he’s a fisherman, trying to sell you one of his late products; or maybe, you’ll work as a waitress at a seafood restaurant, and he’ll just order the best fish of the restaurant. Sometimes you laugh at yourself, just imagining one of these scenes actually happening.

You know that finding soulmates takes time, but if you could only get a hint. Almost all of your friends already found their partners, so why haven’t you? You sincerely don’t care about appearance, or culture, you just want to meet your “universe’s best gift” and understand why the heck his first words to you is a marine fish.

Months pass by, and still, nothing comes your way. You can count on hope, and move forward with your life.

As you finish your second bowl of soup, you wish your grandma a good day and pack your purse to head off to the library two blocks away. The historic building is the best place to spend your autumn afternoons, sitting on a comfy armchair with a book in hand and a tasty hot chocolate along the way. However, your oasis received an interesting addition in the past weeks: something, or rather, someone, has been catching your attention. You don’t know the new customer’s name, but from what you’ve observed (stared, to be frank), he enjoys a lot of mythical books, and prefers to sit alone at a table. 

You know you shouldn't be spending time trying to take note of someone else’s life, but there’s something about him that attracts your mind and takes your eye's attention off the book. It could be the fact that he always wears his coat’s collar up to his mouth, his intriguing grayish hair, or the shape of his beautiful purple eyes that perfectly match his face. 

Okay, maybe you’re noticing too much. 

Sometimes you catch yourself daydreaming about a date with him. He seems like someone polite, even if you never heard him speak. But you don’t have the courage to start a conversation with him, he’s just so… focused on his reading, you wouldn't want to intrude. And besides, a guy like him probably has a girlfriend already.

You return to your previous reading, and by the middle of the sunset, you leave for your house. Grandma said she was going to the supermarket early, so you weren’t surprised to find the place empty when you entered.

But you were surprised when you spotted a finger on the dinner table.

As an instinct, you grab the white porcelain vase from the shelf near the doorway and use it as a protection, your gaze scanning every spot of the living room, and every room of the house. You frown, not finding anything broken or messed up, and the windows are all closed. How did a human finger get on the dinner table then? As far as you know, your grandmother only collects shells.

You type 911 on your phone, anxious by the whole creepy situation, eyes, and ears alert to any signal. While the call is on hold, you approach the table to inspect the unknown finger: It isn’t fresh or dripping with blood, but it strangely looks well-preserved, not marks of degradation. A wave of shivers runs through your body.

“What’s your emergency?” A female voice says through the call.

“Hi, I-”

In one second, your body is thrown hard against the wall by an incomprehensible force. The hit is all your senses can figure out, the sudden pain increasing on your right side while potent dizziness takes over your brain. Fallen on the wooden floor, you take the last of the strength that remains in your muscles to look for what hurt you.

You immediately wish you didn’t make that decision, for you wouldn’t face the haunting creature staring in your direction. A monstrous black shape slowly approaches you, a mouth full of sharpened teeth, and a single lifeless white eye glazed at your form. It mumbles unfamiliar words as it levitates above the floor, a horrid sound that makes you tremble in pure panic.

Is this how you’re gonna die?

Suddenly, you hear the sound of the window breaking into dozens of glass shards, caused by a human form that lands inside your house. You swear, from a quick glimpse, that is the library man five feet away from you, but maybe you’re too dizzy to actually see right. Scared, your eyelids close, and you can only hear the sounds of furniture falling and the creature’s terrifying shrieks. It’s a vivid nightmare, one that you can’t wake up from, but that fortunately ends.

You only open your eyes when you feel two warm, human hands gently holding your shoulders, filling you with the hope that the creature it’s gone. Your gaze widens at the face of your savior.

“It’s you.” You whisper, and unknowingly to you, your sentence is exactly the same words embedded in Inumaki’s wrist. His eyes widen as he realizes it, being able to contemplate the unnatural glow that comes out of your being, the glow that only soulmates can find. 

He found his soulmate.

“Salmon.”

And so did you.

a/n: not gonna lie, this is probably my favorite creation so far. hope enjoy it and giggle with it as much as I did.

© asunflowerana 2024 — all rights reserved.

[iriyaices]

Hello! About your Phoenix Au i was wondering how did ninja find out about Kais true identity? Sorry if you already answered that question :((

It's okay, no one has asked me yet!! I'm in a good mood, so I'll talk about their 3rd life too hehe

In their second life The previous ninja elemental master was close to Kai, they know what Kai is and he would always tell them about his family but never told them their names.

After some events, they can no longer talk to Kai, so they are determined to tell their children the legend of Phoenix

In common legends, the Phoenix is ​​a mythical creature that is immortal. Those legends often tell of its ability as powerful as the FSM, but their stories are different. Phoenix is ​​just a person who lost his beloved family and was cursed with immortality. They often spoke of his bravery, kindness and immense love. hope that one day those stories will be passed on to Kai's future family.

that made the ninjas familiar with the different stories of Phoenix and after Wu adopted them, they learned a lot about Phoenix, [even though he didn't tell them that it was Kai]

After Kai saves Loy from the volcano, the ninjas become suspicious of him, so much so that when Woo calls him Pop, they realize that the Phoenix they've been hearing about all along is actually Kai.

In their 3rd life or a movie for us

The stories are very different. story of the Green Ninja is a legend, and story of Phoenix is ​​just a historical tale that is unknown whether it actually happened

I haven't really thought about the story yet, but I want Kai and Morro to be ninjas before the ninjas, and they don't know each other's identities [Bc Lloyd well] [of course Kai, Morro, and Wu know who they are]

After many battles, they finally learned of each other's identities, but they still didn't know Kai's true identity. The day they learned of it was when they encountered the prophecy about the Golden Ninja, the Overlord, and the end of the Fire Demon's lifespan

Oh yeah, that must be Kai. He was angry, he was furious, he thought about what FSM had said that he would finally be able to sleep in peace, but they never said it would involve the golden ninja, LLOYD, his BROTHER, his KID

He was so angry that he revealed his true form and ran away

Of course, Wu had many stories to tell ninja-

So That's my idea. It's not perfect yet, but I'd love to tell it and maybe draw comic about it [if I have time]

[snek-panini]

The last of my Binderary books, #10 and #11, are here! This is The Mathematical Improbability of Reaching the Stars by cassieoh and D20Owlbear and it is another very long fic that I had to split into two volumes. It's a wonderful Good Omens human!AU with believable relationship development and very likeable OCs. I like to go into summaries at this point in my binding posts but I have trouble pinpointing the reason I like this one so much. It's just compelling and I like spending time with these characters. It reads like an original story and yet it's undeniably a GO fic. I don't know how else to phrase it.

I had a major disappointment with the bind, though. As you can no doubt see in the photos above, there was major glue leakage when I did the htv and it ruined my book cloth. That's a homemade paper-backed cloth and it's this wonderful textured green fabric (I think it's polyester but it's shiny and lightweight) but it did not like that silver foil htv At All. Really sad that it turned out like that. The silver leaves were also an absolute nightmare to weed. So many teeny tiny pieces, and I had to do four of them. I stand by the design, it's very pretty and I still think it fits the book, but I have got to find another option for putting titles on homemade cloth. I've done five of them now and I have this issue every time.

More photos under the cut! It is still a very pretty set, even with the cover issues.

You can see the fabric texture really well on the backs, and there's no glue issue there either. Part of me wishes I'd left the front covers blank like the backs. I love how the spines turned out; that's black faux leather and it always takes htv like a champ. I like how I did the titles here too. I really wanted them on the spines but it's such a long title that I'd have had to scrunch it down really small to make it fit. Weeding tiny text is always a pain and it limits the fonts you can use and still be legible, but splitting it up like this? Love it. Looks so good on my shelf.

Silver foiled edges! I had trouble getting the foil to stick, like always, but I ended up sort of layering it over the unstuck parts and got this kind of patchy look that I love. Handmade double core endbands, and this is one of the most complex patterns I've done in endbands so far. I love them and think they came out really beautiful.

The endpapers are this beautiful chiyogami leaf pattern. I bought these for this fic before I'd even started typesetting it because I knew they'd be perfect. Chiyogami is my favorite thing to use for endpapers lately, I love it so much.

I went really simple on the typeset here. It's a contemporary story, as opposed to a lot of the historical and fantastical ones I tend to bind, and I thought the sleek typeset suited it. I'm not as in love with the title page as I could be but I do like it. It's about the text, not the flourishes, once you get into the meat of the story.

One fun typesetting thing I was able to do with this one happened in the headers and footers. Usually I do page numbers at the bottom, author's name on the top left and title on the top right, but the combination of two authors and a really long title meant the headers got really unwieldy. They were too long and bled into the body text. So I split them up like this, and I love it! Looks so sleek. I've been looking for an excuse to do it like this again on other typesets but it hasn't fit anything yet.

And that's that! I asked for author permission for these but never heard back, so I hope they're both ok with what I did. I'm overall pleased with the results (and in love with parts of it) and I know what I still need to work on.

This is the last of my Binderary books! 11 is too many! I'm never doing that many books in a month again! Now I've got everything posted I feel like I can move on to new projects, though it may be a bit before I have any new books to post. I've got a format experiment in mind.

[bloody-wonder]

mid-year book tag

1. Best Book You’ve Read So Far in 2024? i have read so many good ones this year but no particular one stands out to me as The Best so i'll name top 5 instead (in the order i read them in): a thousand stitches, doctrine of labyrinths, in other lands, big swiss, my brilliant friend - so, quite a range of genres and tones, as usual :)

2. Best Sequel You’ve Read So Far in 2024? the virtu is definitely my favorite part of doctrine of labyrinths and the tropic of serpents, the second book in the memoirs of lady trent, was just a perfect historical fantasy adventure novel - it's like if jane austen wrote indiana jones except it's also a nature documentary about dragons. last but not least, empire of the damned which came out in march solidified jay kristoff's empire of the vampire as my favorite vampire book series. you might have heard me screaming about it from the rooftops. all three of these sequels, i find, are even better than the previous book in their respective series.

3. New Release You Haven’t Read Yet, But Want To? i'm saving kj charles' death in the spires for the fall since it's a spooky campus murder mystery (i think?) and i also want to read apostles of mercy and so finish lindsay ellis' sci fi series (which i have lost interest in somewhat tbh but i'm nothing if not a completionist lol). i was curious about the familiar but the reviews i've seen don't look too promising so i'm probably not going to prioritize it.

4. Most Anticipated Release For Second Half of 2024? i'm looking forward to kj charles' new romance book, the duke at hazard, as well as the new evander mills mystery, rough pages, but the piece of fiction i'm anticipating the most is actually the radioapple southern gothic au by my favorite fanfic author reminiscentbells. she's going to write the whole thing this summer and start posting in september - i'm so excitedddd😱

5. Biggest Disappointment? emily wilde's encyclopaedia of faeries is the book equivalent of a ghoul wearing the skin of your beloved. i wasn't a fan of a deadly education either😒 was very excited to read gaywyck but the expectations of "jane eyre but gay" which the cover of that book gave me were unfortunately not met🤷‍♀️

6. Biggest Surprise? i didn't think i might be into extreme horror and neither did i fancy myself a sally rooney girlie so i was quite surprised that i liked her conversations with friends as well as the sluts by dennis cooper. will definitely read more from both authors next year. an even bigger surprise however was solitaire which i picked up on a whim after tori came out as ace in the last heartstopper volume. i have a complicated relationship with alice oseman's books mostly due to the fact that i'm years past the target demographic age but still feel compelled to read them bc it seems they're the only mainstream books with prominent aro/ace rep out there. so i didn't expect much and was astonished to discover that tori spring is like looking at a mirror reflection of my 18yo self - uncanny in a fun way. ig i shouldn't be so surprised this turned out to be my favorite oseman book since it's the one with the most mixed reviews lol people like to hate a depressed teenage girl😬

7. Favorite New Author? i have devoured doctrine of labyrinths and the cemeteries of amalo in february so now i can safely say sarah monette aka katherine addison is one of my favorite authors. each of her series has a different tone but there are consistent themes of real or magical disability and non amatonormative relationships which are explored in creative ways throughout her stories. i also like her worldbuilding quite a bit, especially the naming systems and fantasy terminology. i read more books by celeste ng as well as by vale aida - both are likely to become favorite authors too. in the latter's case - provided she writes a sequel to hostis. if not, i shall never forgive her😅

8. Newest Favorite Character? okay this is just impossible to narrow down! first of all, liathe from empire of the damned bc i want her Gender: wearing a porcelain mask and a splendid crimson coat, formally bowing to her adversaries before she beats the shit out of them with her blood sword, referring to herself by the royal we and hissing every time she speaks - character of all time material right there. behold my beautiful girl who has done nothing wrong!🥰

(official illustrations by bon orthwick)

secondly, elliot schafer bc he's the most obnoxious prickly boy in other lands and yet everyone wants him carnally lol. i adore his internal monologue - probably the best i've read in ya. his dialogue too tbh - his cutting repartee game is off the charts. honestly, he's just my favorite type of character: a mean bisexual gremlin who scolds people so creatively that they fall in love with him on the spot. what more can you ask.

finally, i have to mention that to my great surprise i liked mildmay more than felix harrowgate🤯 idk felix is this cunty traumatized savant which is a character archetype i'm used to liking so it was a safe bet. the opposites attract sidekick or love interest of such a character is usually not my cup of tea but mildmay is the exception that proves the rule ig. mostly it's bc of his unusual manner of speaking with those funny slang turns of phrase and just generally the contrast between his expressive internal monologue and his reserved demeanor. as a result, he easily rivals felix as the most interesting guy in the book. such excellent character work! taking my hat off to monette🎩

9. Newest Fictional Crush? i reserve this question for that special kind of obsession only a very particular character can inspire and this year it's alastor from hazbin hotel. which, i know, is not a book but i have read so much alastor fanfic in the last few months that he's basically like a book character to me at this point lol

💕Best Ship💕 elliot schafer and luke sunborn are very cute. i don't usually go for cute but here we are. especially after reading that short story from luke's pov i realized i just need more of these two together😌 felix and mildmay with their unholy magic bdsm union - need i say more? forbidden ship that watered my crops. last but not least, i'm currently trudging through the realm of the elderings bc of fitz and the fool and as of assassin's quest it finally started paying off: i'm being queerbaited and asking for more🥲

10. Book That Made You Cry? a thousand stitches is such a wholesome cozy book and it made me cry multiple times the way that a nostalgic movie from childhood can make you cry sometimes. especially the pug scene😭 the scenes of thara celehar walking the corn maze in the cemeteries of amalo made me cry a lot too. the symbolic depths addison is able to achieve with the labyrinth motif, the exploration of grief and forgiveness and letting go - unparalleled🤌

11. Book That Made You Happy? a thousand stitches made me happy! especially the pug scene!!😅 honestly it was like watching a disney movie back when they were good except also more relatable bc atwater's characters read neurodivergent and aspec-coded to me. love how she maintains that the kiss of true love that breaks the faerie curse doesn't have to be romantic. re-reading the three musketeers made me very happy too - it's one of my top 10 favorite books of all time and i was kinda nervous i might not like it as much as an adult. well the joke's on me bc now i can confirm it's one of the best books ever written😊 reading in other lands and big swiss cheered me up a lot too bc they're just so damn funney😄

12. Favorite Book Adaptation You Saw This Year? haven't seen a lot of adaptations so ig dune part two wins by default. twas a fine movie. the wheel of time is also a nice show in my opinion but i didn't read the source material so idk how good it is adaptation-wise🤷‍♀️

13. Favorite Review You’ve Written This Year? my favorite ones are probably the ones i wrote about the three musketeers and in other lands but i think i also wrote some good critical/negative reviews of the mask of mirrors and of the vorkosigan books i read this year (1 2 3)

14. Most Beautiful Cover? behold the cover of the voyage of the basilisk!🤩 i want to frame it and hang it on my wall so that i can gaze at it adoringly and connect with my inner ishmael

(art by todd lockwood)

i also like this vintage romance cover of gaywyck and the uk covers of the farseer trilogy. it's a shame that the books are not as good as the covers led me to believe. especially in the case of gaywyck - this cover is Such A Vibe! but alas

15. What Books Do You Need To Read By The End of The Year? in terms of series i want to finish the memoirs of lady trent, read one more witcher book, at least a couple vampire chronicles and then reread swordspoint and hopefully complete that series too. other fantasy i want to get to at last is fire & blood and the hands of the emperor - both are big and intimidating tho. for my classics challenge i need to finish a couple of tomes i'm reading slowly throughout the year and then also read the name of the rose. american psycho and mona awad's bunny have been on my tbr for ages - maybe i'll finally read them this fall. and i also want to finish reading kj charles' backlist bc the completionism drive is stronger than the fear of having no kj charles to read lol

i never do things a normal amount - every time i take up new media i go all in. so i had a musicals phase, a movies phase, a tv show phase - each lasting a few years and then i barely watched any of these once the phase ended. which is why i've been wondering if my current Book Phase is about to wrap up soon but, given how many books i managed to read since january, it sure doesn't seem that way. instead, it feels like the more i read the better i am at finding books that i'm likely to enjoy - which leads to more reading. and i cannot complain about that tbh😁📚

tagging @magpiefngrl @doh-rae-me @oliviermiraarmstrongs @fugitoidkry @pinkasrenzo @counterwiddershins @figuringthengsout @sugarbabywenkexing @fandomreferencepending @venndaai @weirdsociology @sixappleseeds @theodoradove

please tell me what you've been reading this year (if you want)! one can't have too many book recs👀

goodreads │ old mid year tags 2020 2021 2022 2023

[fr-wiwiw]

well, to indulge myself i'm writing this post to ramble and share a bit of my Gahan barbarian!au. it's going to be a bit of a long post i think, we'll see.

i saw noel's post about their gladiator!yohan & prince!gaon (check it here!) and it makes me miss writing the arranged marriage barbarian!au i have, it only has what.. 3 or 4 chapters I think. you can read it here.

i've always been fascinated by the visuals of medieval, historical, period era. even post apocalyptic future settings like Horizon Zero games franchise.

i think i started au bcs i've played too much Assassin's Creed Valhalla— i haven't finished it yet, too preoccupied with Monster Hunter World— but i have sketched my female Eivor several times in my sketchbook. this was when i'm curious and interested enough to draw human but haven't fully grasped the gesture, anatomy, shapes and all. i usually draw what i take interest on and it helps me tremendously, to keep on learning and push through my frustrations.

and of course.. my Gahan brainrot picked it up. hence the barbarian!au for TDJ born

i have sketches of Gahan in this au, i think i've shared them here too but i'll re-share here. it doesn't catch many eyes, i admit it's a bit of a bummer but I like the idea anyway. I used to imagined them before I went to sleep, now it's idol/celeb!gaon x mysterious husband!yohan that's occupying my mind. but anyways! here are the sketches.

1st sketch is me trying to see his body proportion in viking/barbarian attire. the upper left sketch was me wanting to see modern Yohan stripping off his clothes ig haha.. anyways, between Gaon/Jinyoung and Yohan/Jisung, it's VERY difficult to nail down his face. less lines doesn't resembles him at all and add some more lines he looks too realistic to my simplified version of Gaon/Jinyoung. it was hard trying to find the balance for these characters to be in the same picture and look like they belong in the same style. i want to do Yohan/Jisung's pretty face justice but i still struggled in this sketches. i think this was 2021? 2022?

2nd sketch— his long protruding neck lmao i haven't fully grasped how a person can pose naturally but it came out as if he has turtle neck syndrome going on. well done Yohan! you are a turtle apparently according to my hand. all jokes aside, this was me attempting to paint his face bcs i never really attempted to paint gahan. i doodled and sketched more than i paint/rendering and i'm on my way to learn more of rendering daily if possible, alongside with my daily sketches. you can also see i've tried to give some color to his attire and some medallion or such. do you see a braid there? i will get there, the braid is something significant in this story ;)

3rd sketch is basically me planning out his character design as a barbarian/viking chief. you can see bits of references cuts here and there, took me quite some time bcs i just started to really try my hands on concept character design properly— i love cloaks and capes and vikings has exactly just that, and the winter times are especially my favorite type of attire on them so i thought why not give Yohan polar bear fur as his official formal attire while still flaunting his wonderful body to the world be it summer or winter lmao. here's where you know it's fantasy. i'm sure people back then drink ales and what not to keep their body warm so they can go bare-chested in winter even but i'm sure the day after that they will regret it. but i make Yohan and his clan to have special abilities for living in cold places. doesn't mean i don't make them wear winter attire but this is only bcs i want him to be bare-chested xD the one I post here was before i dabble on the sketch a bit more. hopefully one day i can share it again with more updates for this au.

now.. onto Gaon's sketches.

he's a Prince in this story. his parents, the King and the Queen, arranged a marriage for him for political reasons. but they have special reasons as to why they pick Yohan, aside from political purposes, to be their son's betrothed and gave him away to Yohan's barbarian clan.

1st sketch (ignore the upper left, that's Jinyoung from his other drama). i want to see him in medium and long hair length. there's a purpose to this. he has his canon Gaon hairstyle when he was the Prince in the palace. but with time and some adjustments living with Yohan and his barbarian clan rubs off on him. perhaps it's due to that, or he's grown tired to cut it off again and again (he has no one to groom him properly now unlike in the palace), practical reason is to maintain heat around his neck while in winter, or it's his idea of adapting and blending in with the enemy. you can't blame him for being wary. he's whisked away from his comfort place and home and married off to a fearsome and famous barbarian on the land at that time, almost willingly got raped by Yohan on 1st chapter (yes, you read that right). other reasons why he grows his hair, as i mentioned the culture rubs off on him, is something to do with the hair braiding too. and personal reason is that i want to see pretty Gaon in long hair lol

2nd sketch on the left was him on early days on Yohan's fur beddings. the right was him perhaps laughing out loud by some surprising and amusing thing Yohan said after living with him for some months, you can see the different hair length there. gosh he looks unalive in here lol idk why.. my sketches were still rigid here

3rd sketch is them after establishing a genuine intimate relationship and Yohan has to be away to fend off some unexpected visitors. unfortunately it cost Yohan some of his men's lives. but he made it back to his clan and his betrothed. i make it as if Gaon was anxious waiting for him and one of the barbarian shouted for Yohan's arrival and he ran immediately. lunged at Yohan perhaps, the barbarian Chief managed to catch him but didn't quite have the strength to carry them both upright as the weariness sinks into him post battle & adrenaline wearing off of him. he's home now, in Gaon's arms.

now.. the hair braiding.

barbarians/viking has long hair and braids on their hair. styled cascading down or up into a pony tail or a mohawk and such. idk if this is historically correct but i'm winging most of this anyway but the idea of braids in this story is that it's significant to lovers. it's a mark between special intimate relationship (like lovers, spouses, soulmates). one can have a braid or braid their lover's hair should they wish to, it's very intimate and special for them. jeweleries might have certain status symbol for them and their ranks but I also prefer these barbarians have something simple to symbolize their intimacy. something that can get overlooked but enough for their significant other to know (and some people) what it means.

I like the idea of Yohan having accessories for his attire but his hair is clean from braids. clearly it's saying something if you've read this far and seeing my sketches for their different stages of relationship. over the years of them finally developing feelings and genuinely established a relationship, despite already being married an Gaon almost got raped by Yohan, they are lovers.

yet Yohan never really initiates anything about him wanting to have braid(s) or braiding Gaon's hair. he might have explained about what braids are to Gaon when the bambi was curious or off-handedly commented something about it. Gaon really finds out the real meaning from Yohan's ppl and he wonders why Yohan never asks or wants braids from him. then he realizes Yohan has always been respectful to him, even years after that night he almost raped him. always keeping healthy distance, outside of their sex and other intimate physical affections, he usually waits until Gaon ask first regarding intimate things. not that he never initiates things, he figures something as serius and committed as this is something Gaon wants to have an option to bail out from. they were arranged to have marriage for political reasons after all, Gaon has the freedom to not have feelings for him as long as he stays within the wedding pact rules Yohan make with the King & the Queen ( for Gaon's sake too). He never expects to have feelings for the Prince and he always keeps the option of Gaon falling out of love of him one day. it is only fair, he thinks.

but then Gaon asks him if he wants Gaon to braid his hair. the Prince never ceases to make him falter. it still shocks and amuses him, to have someone have this much effect on him. even with nervousness and blushing state Gaon is in now after uttering those words.. Yohan wonders what he has done to have this kind of luxury to have someone this precious in his arms.

and if his people noticed a single braid just near the back of his neck when wind swept his hair or if he pulls his hair into a ponytail on hot summer days? they will all grin smugly.. Yohan likes to keep it a bit hidden from view mainly bcs it's practical and he doesn't want ppl to accidentally graze it off when he's having friendly wrestle matches or axe practices. or even having people cut it off when he's at war. he doesn't hide it per se, it's visible when it's visible. Gaon smiles sweetly and adoringly when he finds this out bcs to him, it feels as if Yohan is unconsciously protecting it. protecting their relationship, protecting Gaon.

and if Gaon walks out of Yohan's tent, that days when he asks if he can braid Yohan's hair, with a braid or several on his hair? visible to everyone? the people cheer and roar in celebration. they throw a huge feast and toast to their relationship, congratulating the power couple. wishing the gods to give these two their blessings and to protect them. they're finally able to see their Chief have a partner that is equal to him. it's a memorable day

but if you think this story doesn't come with heavy angst, tears, pain and betrayal.. well think again ;))

i will stop here. thankyou for reading! i hope i can pick up this au again in my drawings & writings

[shadows-2ndshadow]

Maria Robotnik & Chris Throndyke AU

Maria and Gerald were found frozen in capsule and are now alive and well. They both “work”/are under investigation by GUN but are able to live their lives well enough.

Gerald being a historically great scientist has a big fan in Chuck Thorndyke (Chris’ grandfather) and he insist on letting the Robotnik’s stay in one of their many houses. Shadow is less than pleased but he knows at least they will be fine. Shadow is pretty much joined at the hip with Maria at this point, being her major bodyguard/protector/etc etc.

Now the first time Maria visits Chris’ house for their grandparents to discuss, she excuses herself to use the bathroom. When she is coming out of the bathroom she becomes mesmerized with the window in the hall looking out to the big backyard, fountain, garden, pretty much everything she had dreamed Earth would be.

“You know Sonic almost drowned in that pool.” She heard a voice say.

She gasped and turned to him. “You must be Maria. I’m Chris Throndyke, I’m the professor’s grandson,” he explains as he places out his hand for a handshake.

Handshake. Right, Maria thought. People touch hands. It’s okay, I’m healthy now. I can-

“I’m sorry. Do you-“

“Maria, there you are.” Shadow says at the end of the hall.

Both human teens turn to the ultimate lifeform walking into the hall. “I was worried something had happened,” Shadow explains.

“I’m fine,” she responds, “I just bumped into …Chris, was it?”

“Yes, it’s Chris.” He smilies. A soft warm smile.

“I was about to tell him, Shadow, that he has a wonderful backyard,” Maria explained, “They even have Goji berries! Can you believe it!”

Shadow calmed down as he now held Maria’s hand. He had been doing that more than usual now. And while she is thankful that it calms down her nerves as it did when she was younger, it’s still feels a lot different. Shadow’s been awake for a little more than a year and still remembers very little of what she does.

“Yes, my mother absolutely loves them so my dad had a few trees shipped from West Africa.” He explained.

“Is that environmentally conscious?” She asked

“What do you mean?”

“The plants are in different regions for a reason. Could they harm the ecosystem of this region? Wasn’t this area of the continent supposed to be a desert? Wouldn’t-“

Maria stopped mid rant. Darn Robotnik genes and their need to be argumentative for something that seemed totally fine to everyone. Now he’s just going to go away and think she’s the wierd girl who cares too much about berries.

“Uh, well I’m not sure. “ Chris responded, “I never thought about that, I’ll talk to our horticulturist about it. Thanks for the advice!”

“There you guys are!” Sonic exclaimed with Tails coming by behind him, “I just wanted to warn you that they are giving you the beach house and between you and me, you guys got the short end of the-“

“A BEACH HOUSE!” Maria exclaimed, “Like the ocean! Shadow, I’ll finally get to see the ocean isn’t that exciting!”

Before Chris could say anything, the ark siblings were gone and Sonic couldn’t quite put why Chris had a small smile as he looked down to the ground. “Hey Tails,” Chris asked, “What do you know about Goji berry ecosystems?”

[serene-faerie]

RGG Ishin Actor AU

I've seen a few posts about an Actor AU for RGG Ishin, so here are some of my ideas about the cast of this AU.

Kiryu is the industry newbie, and a rising star. He's also a formidable martial artist who does his own stunts, and he's got some impressive acting skills, too. Up until now, he's mostly been in low-budget films and TV dramas as troubled heroes and occasionally as the romantic hero as well. He's also worked with Saejima and Ryuji in action movies, so he's on pretty good terms with them both. But now, he's finally landed his very first leading role as Sakamoto Ryoma/Saito Hajime, in his very first big-budget epic film. While a little nervous about working with a bunch of big-name actors, he's quick to win everyone over through his talents, his skills, and his genuine kindness off-camera.

Majima is an A-list actor, well-known for his impressive acting range. He's never been typecast in any single character type, and he's also a delight to work with. While Majima initially started out with acting in crime dramas and films, he has since branched out to other genres and expanded his horizons significantly. He's also won many awards for his films, and he's also done some acting in Hollywood films, too. He gets along pretty well with Kiryu on the set of Ishin, and he's more than happy to become sort of a mentor for the newbie actor.

Nishiki is an A-list actor and model. He started out his career as a model, then his acting career began with romance dramas. Now, Nishiki is one of the most bankable stars in the industry. While Nishiki does have a bit of a reputation as a diva, many directors would give anything to work with him, because having his name attached to a project will secure a film's success. He's widely considered a sex symbol in the industry because of his good looks and modelling skills. Nishiki's also got an impressive acting range that's won him many awards, whether he's playing romantic heroes or dark brooding villains like Okada Izo. On the set of Ishin, he and Kiryu get along surprisingly well, and eventually become pretty close friends.

Saejima is a former action star who's starting to branch out into dramatic films. Like Kiryu, Saejima's also a skilled martial artist who does his own stunts, and he's got the skills to be a dramatic actor as well. He's also close friends with Majima, since the both of them have known each other long before they entered the film industry. Sometimes, when he reads his scripts, he has his own ideas about his characters, and he'll always give suggestions to directors about certain things to implement. Ishin is his first venture into historical pieces, and if this movie is successful, then his serious acting career is all but guaranteed.

Shibusawa, Awano, and Kuze are all industry veterans who are particularly well-known for their work in historical films and in crime films, too. Kuze started out as a pro boxer before he switched to acting, but he's not the biggest fan of the industry parties and events. He plans to retire from acting soon, and hopes to run his own boxing gym as a coach after filming for Ishin is wrapped up. Awano is both an award-winning actor and a filmmaker, known for playing characters who rebel against the social structure. In his younger days, he was also something of a party animal, and he still enjoys attending industry parties even now. Shibusawa started out his career as an actor, but these days, he mostly produces films. He's exceptionally talented, and incredibly influential in the entire film industry, and he's also very well-known in the Western world, too.

Zhao is another well-known actor who started out in TV dramas before venturing into films. He began his career as a stand-up comedian and impressionist, but he's mostly been in dramatic films after proving his acting chops in his debut film. Zhao loves working on historical films, and he often takes great care to research the time period so he can apply his knowledge to the characters he plays. He's also a great chef, and he loves to cook meals for his co-stars during breaks in filming. He also owns a successful Chinese restaurant in Yokohama, which he runs with his close friend Tesso.

Joon-gi Han is a K-pop idol based in Japan, and he's also starting a film career like Kiryu. While he's already pretty popular in his native Korea, he's become a huge sensation and sex symbol in Japan, thanks to his modelling collaboration Nishiki, and his musical collaborations with several J-pop idols. Han initially started his acting career as romantic heroes, but he's since proven to be even better at playing sinister characters. He has an incredibly devoted international fanbase who have been cheering him on ever since he ventured into acting. He's also a skilled martial artist, and he does his own stunts much like Kiryu and Saejima. When he's not acting or singing, Han manages a super elite, exclusive nightclub in Tokyo.

Ryuji is both an actor and a professional wrestler. He actually started out as a bodyguard for a celebrity, then became a successful wrestler with the WWE. He also has some decent acting chops, though he's mostly appeared in action movies. Nevertheless, his presence never fails to delight audiences, since he knows how to make all his scenes memorable. Ishin is his first venture into dramatic films, but he's nothing if not dedicated to doing well in the role of Saigo Kichinosuke. His most favorite scene in the Ishin film is his homoerotic bathhouse fight with Kiryu, and he's not ashamed to admit this in promotional interviews.

Haruka is a J-pop idol who's starting a film career to shed her wholesome, cutesy popstar image. While she's only a teenager, she's got a lot of potential as an actress, and she gets along with everyone on the set of Ishin. She and Kiryu form a close bond that lasts even after filming is wrapped up, with Kiryu becoming something of a father figure to her.

Mine is both an A-list actor and a supermodel. Like Nishiki, Mine started out his career as a model before he made his acting debut in a historical movie. Since then, he's been in a variety of epic historical pieces with settings that range from the Heian period to the Meiji period. Mine's good looks and modelling skills have also made him a sex symbol, and his mysterious aloofness has only enhanced his appeal. He's particularly close to Daigo Dojima, who helped him get a start in acting.

This is everything that I have so far. What do you all think? If you have suggestions for other characters, feel free to add them on!

[gefionne]

Hi Gefionne!

Have you been reading any good books lately? I recently read “A River Endless” because I saw you mention it, and I enjoyed it a lot.

I noticed you have written quite a few fanfics set in a historical AU. I can only imagine the amount of research this takes and as a fellow fanfic writer I would love to hear a bit about your process when you write these.

Do you enjoy reading historical fiction in general, do you have any favorites that you would recommend?

Hello, friend!

I'm glad you enjoyed A River Endless! I also enjoyed those books, since I've been on a fantasy kick in the past 6 months. I loved fantasy most as a kid, and while I moved away from it for a while, I reread the Shades of Magic series by V.E. Schwab and got yanked back into wanting to read fantasy.

Shades of Magic is a favorite, though iirc Schwab's first move from YA to adult fiction. It still has a very YA flavor because of that, but it's such an engaging world that I got sucked in. Totally wrote an OT3 fic based on the series when I finished it again this time lol.

Other stuff I've really liked lately:

Emily Wilde's Encyclopedia of Faeries and Emily Wilde's Map of the Otherlands by Heather Fawlett - I really like her prose style and the books overall are whimsical and endearing.

Catherine House by Elisabeth Thomas - Dark academia with a supernatural twist; reread it recently.

Daughter of the Moon Goddess and Heart of the Sun Warrior by Sue Lynn Tan - Also YA-flavored adult fantasy inspired by Chinese mythology.

Summer Sons by Lee Mandelo - I love this book. I will never stop gushing about this book. I reread it this summer because it's a creepy, humid Southern gothic that's queer af and has delicious prose.

In terms of historical fiction, I've had a lot of trouble connecting with it for quite a while now, despite having written a couple of meaty historical fics. There are some quirks of historicals that will bug me enough from the start that I can't get into them: mostly that they info dump the setting within the first paragraph with a laundry list of historical details that's like "Hey, look, I did my research!" but it actually makes the story sound like a freshman HIS101 paper, not a novel.

One of the toughest things about writing historicals is doing all that research and then judiciously weaving it into the story, not putting your whole-ass knowledge of details into every page. While of course I want to make the setting come alive with historical detail, in the end, the story is about the characters and their arc, so you have to walk this line of putting in enough detail to make it believable while not getting bogged down in the details. If a historical novel leans too hard on establishing the setting at the very start and less on introducing the characters, I tend to put it down because it seems like a book about the period, not a book about these people I'm supposed to care for. I might as well read non-fiction for that. All the historicals I've picked up lately--which, admittedly, isn't that many--have been like that, so I noped out.

My research for fics is not anywhere what would need to be done for a novel I'd be willing to query. I read 3 books about the Eagle Squadrons, watched a movie or two, and always had the internet's legion of aviation nerds at hand when I was writing my WWII Royal Air Force AU, but I still fudged enough that I'd be reluctant to do more than fanfiction with it. All historicals require some fudging, extrapolation, and creative license, but if I wrote an RAF novel, I'd have a far larger reading list.

For Limerence, the 70s English public school AU, I read a book of accounts of queer men and their experiences in public school, with some history of public school in general. Again, not half enough to float a novel, but perfectly adequate for my purposes of writing a fic for fun. The Good Omens fic that spans several historical eras is a product of internet research, and I believe one commenter found an historical misstep with tea, when it wouldn't've been available in the place Zira and Crowley currently were. I nodded to them for noticing the error, but didn't go back and fix it because while I put a lot of work into my fics and take them seriously as an art form, I'm comfortable with some anachronisms or imperfections in historical accuracy because I do, in fact, write these fics for fun around a full-time job, house, partner, and pet, and people can read them for free.

My advice for writing historical fics: pick up at least one non-fiction book about the period you're writing about, then see if you want to read more books or just chill on the internet. Decide how much you're comfortable fudging and what you need to be super accurate. Then focus on your characters and plot, using the setting to prop them up and make them come alive. The setting/time isn't the main focus, but you have to know enough about it to let your story unfold within its confines.

Anyway, this is so long and if you've made it all the way to the bottom, anon, that's lovely. I was just taking a break from my workday to reply, so it's back to the grind. ;-)

Love, Gef

[kriz-fics]

The Sword's Legacy

Series Summary: As the heir of your father's lands, you have grown up knowing that one day you must wed to your House's advantage, and there's no better catch than the younger son of the Magister himself. Meanwhile tensions within the king's court are set to come to a head at any moment - it just needs that spark to send everything ablaze. Now in a court more dangerous than the one you entered, you find distraction and joy in the company of the beautiful boy with the beautiful eyes. You can only hope to weather the storm you can sense brewing in the horizon.

Masterlist

Chapter Nineteen: Weeds and Duty

Pairing: Eren Jaeger x Female Reader

Genre: Royalty AU, Historical Fantasy AU, Romance, Politics, Warfare, Eventual Smut (future chapters), Slow Burn

Length: 9.7K

CW: Pretty tame this chap, though there is a bit of friskiness in there. Recommended listening for YN's POV in the beach: Dancing in the Rain

“Ah, this one would be-”

“Demon’s thistle, sir.”

The Lord Alexander Rhyzkov laughs. “My daughter has taught you well.”

Eren lets forth his own chuckle. “That she has, sir.”

That dreaded day of goodfatherly bonding turns out not to be so dreadful. A huge bear of a man he may be, but the Lord Paramount of Vascalin is as gentle as a pup, and amiable as he always is.

Eren had started the day utterly sick with nerves. On the one hand, dawdling in his rooms seemed like a very viable option. He had almost done so; the thought of what his future father by marriage would say (or do) were he late killed the notion dead. Eren hastened forth, as frightened as if he were walking to the scaffold. 

Like the condemned, he took inventory of his sins, especially those against the ancient House of Rhyzkov. Not many, to be sure, but he had trespassed now and again. He could’ve endeared himself better to the family in the wheelhouse when they were yet traveling. There was that incident with the newt and Lydia (she did keep the thing as a pet and laughed about it afterward, but still). Then, there was his worst sin, the worst and blackest of them all, which had everything to do with the Rhyzkovs’ beloved heir and his less-than-pure thoughts of her over the past year…

He resolved never to look the Lord of Arsechkala in the eye, then - eye contact was crucial for the reading of minds, and Eren had taken into his head that the lord of bears could somehow read his.

Funny that his first battle (which was not a battle, not in the truest sense) had not been half as petrifying as the prospect of spending time alone with his future goodfather. The absurdity of it all had sobered him. He is an anointed knight, the Falcon Knight, the Knight of Highridge, he had faced worse things. He is a man and this would not unman him. And so he went, determined to face it like the man he is.

He need not have girded up his loins so tightly, for good fortune smiled upon him. For this day, at least.

“Not all weeds are an evil, as any man of the field will tell you. Some have their uses.” Lord Alexander pulls up another bunch of fine, silvery spider weed and adds it to his already teeming basket. “Some are eaten, some are drunk, some have other, more extraordinary uses.” He considers the mass in his hamper and nods in approval. “I think I have enough for the making of one kerchief. For the sweet lady of the house.”

The utter love in the older man’s mien resonates with Eren. His own lady’s sweet smiling face fills his world. He has a gift for you (another, yet another, you can never get too much, he can never give too much), furnished by nature as well. It is no delicate scrap of gauzy spider silk but it should be no less remarkable. Or so he hopes. It will all rely on his skill; hard work has never been so crucial, not if he wants what is best for his lady.

“There’s a lesson to be had in weeds, I think,” Lord Alexander goes on, uprooting dandelions and adding them to his second basket, filled with more dandelions, clovers, and nettles. Edible weeds, fit for tea. “I shan’t lay them all out, but they’re there, if you care to think on it.”

The Month of Resting came upon them at a slow creep and with it true autumn for them as live in the South. The autumn storms blew ever more fierce each week, which heralded the closing of the ports. A serene silence fell over the city as the people took their rest from seasons’ worth of hard work. The rains drive them all within and keep them there, in any case, as though determined to let them have that much-needed respite from the slog.

Goldhaven’s sanctum is not so green as before. Browns and yellows and oranges, crimson and gold, autumn’s hues paint the sacred gardens in vast swathes. The ever-present wind is chill and cuts through cloth as a hot knife cuts through butter (for those stupid enough not to dress proper up here, anyway). The day dawned a rare one, lacking cloud and shade, and so Goldhaven’s lord sent the dire invitation at last.

“How has your stay been so far?” Lord Alexander eyes a bunch of still-blooming goldenglow thoughtfully, before adding them to his tea basket.

A clutch of raven blades catch Eren’s eye. Good for the memory, you tell him helpfully, and so he sets about taking them up. He can give them to you for your brews. “It’s been a terrific couple of months, I thank you so much for the hospitality,” he answers the lord’s erstwhile question, polite as pie.

Lord Alexander hums in approval. A comfortable silence, one of many occurring that day, falls upon knight and lord. For a long while, Eren is content to spend the time merely weeding, searching for those that can be of use to his sweet Healer. Most boys will be searching for flowers for their girls, not weeds, yet here he is. The thought is most humorous. He had given you a lifetime’s worth of blooms the past season, in any case; you are always better off with a little more variety, he likes to think.

“You grew up in part in the South, yes? Lenberg, as I recall. Is it so very different from these parts?” Lord Alexander hands him a blackberry from the nearby bush and eats one himself.

Eren murmurs thanks and pops the morsel in his mouth. It is sweet if a little tart, and succulent; the juice runs down his throat in sugary rivulets, so very tasty. “It is different, sir, but not so much that both sides are distinct from the other. Different tongue, different customs, but otherwise the same.” He smiles a little. “Now that I’ve spent time without them, I find that I can miss our holy days. The Creed’s, I mean. Not that it’s deadly dull here or anything!” he rushes to clarify before the lord can take offense. “It’s just… You don’t celebrate much. But if you do, it’s so much more… exciting.”

The lord, to Eren’s great, good fortune, does not take offense. “‘Tis true, we don’t have cause to celebrate any one god for every month of the year, and so we limit ourselves to life’s most significant occasions. But, see, we have more gods than the Creed could ever fathom. If we did as you do, we would be feasting every day forevermore to appease the Old Ones, they who are nameless and without number.”

Eren steals a look at the nearby godstone. It is the cleanest, most well-cared-for godstone he has ever seen, so much so that he can see every detail upon the proud, serene face of the featured god. How many gods does this one represent? he wonders.

“So, a knight you are now,” the Lord Alexander remarks, absently, almost to himself. He seems far away from Eren then, though he is standing not five feet away, twirling a bloom of poppy between his fingers. He catches Eren’s stare and smiles beneath his big, luxurious beard. “A title most well-earned. Not easily, I know,” the older man’s eyes linger on Eren’s face, at the slash above his left eyebrow, then flickers to his right arm, at the puckered scar concealed by his tunic’s sleeve. “It seems we are both marked by that day.” The lord rubs at the rich amber sleeve of his robe distractedly, at the right forearm that bears the mark of the northman’s blade. “But yours were more nobly begotten. It is no small feat to save the life of the Majesty himself.”

“It was my duty.” They are his own words, it is his own tongue, yet Eren hears a stranger speaking.

“Duty.” Lord Alexander seems to ponder the word. The poppy twirls in his hand, red petals spinning left, right, and back again, unceasing. The older man gathers himself, and Eren finds that he has held his breath, bracing for what his future goodfather may say. “She is your duty.”

That… is most unexpected. “Sir?” Eren frowns a little, confused.

“Her. The Lady Rhyzkova to come. She will be your calling, the heart of your service. Oh, they make you swear, to defend, to be truthful, to be loyal. To serve. But such vows these are. Who shall you defend? The weak, the helpless. To whom should you be loyal? To her, your liege. Yet, in the end, it all comes back to the king, who is above all.”

The poppy drifts from the large and lordly hand, to land lightly on the basket atop the goldenglow. Red on gold. The Rhyzkov colors inversed. 

“Service is the very essence of a knight,” the lord continues his solemn speech, “but you are more than just her knight. Of knights she has aplenty, of husbands she will have only the one. Knights are loyal, obedient, dutiful, yet their vows would have them serve many, too many. A husband has only to serve one. A husband is bound only to one. For where she goes, will you go. From two now as one, your hearts forever bind.”

The words of the wedding rite. New and old both. 

Eren can feel his heart beat just that bit faster as his goodfather-to-be fixes him with the most imposing look. “The weak, the helpless, the king, you have a duty to them. But next to her, what are they? Remote and far away and not immediate. She is your everyday. Your duty, you will revolve around her. So be there for her. Be there for her, Eren, as her mother is for me.”

The smile the older man gives Eren softens the austere lines of the bearded face as he goes on, “It is a heavy burden, to rule. It is tiring and oppressive, so very oppressive. And it gets lonely, up there at the seat of power. She will need you to help her bear the chains of command. Carry her, protect her, love her. We do not oft come into it, love, not our sort, but I think…” Eren fights not to look away as Lord Alexander gazes at him with so much gravity as if to lay bare the very soul of him. Her eyes. You have the lord’s eyes. You are the very image of your mother, but for those eyes. The wicker of his basket digs into his palms. “Yes, I think love is not such a hard commission, not for you.”

Loving tenderness takes the lord’s face over once more as he bends to pluck more poppies. “I would have fallen beneath the weight of my own chains had Theresia not been there with me through it all,” says Lord Alexander, so very softly. “Love her, Eren. That is all I ask, as a father who loves his daughter. Keep to that duty and I will rest content.”

Duty. She can be such a poxy bitch at times. It had never been for her sake that Eren took up the call to arms. Duty had been far from his mind when he set out to become a warrior. They are not so much strangers nowadays. He had learned the way of duty over the years, she is not so exacting a mistress as he makes her out to be, granted. Yet he is slowly coming to find that she is easier to bear with some more than others.

He can bear duty to you. “I will, sir. There’s no one else I’d sooner serve than her,” Eren Jaeger avows, with his own words and his own tongue.

The lord bends to pick up his baskets, pleased and so very content. “Nothing could please me more.” He is a big man, Alexander Rhyzkov, a veritable bear of a lord, yet his countenance at present is more redolent of a child’s stuffed bear than a living, savage one. “Of all the candidates for the hand of my daughter, you are the best of them, I see that now. I could not have asked for a better goodson.”

Warmth blooms deep within Eren at the heartening words. “I-I’m glad you think so, my lord,” he forces out and stoops to retrieve his own basket - the better to look away from the older man, he is so flattered and so, so flustered - then hurriedly snatches his hand back as he spies a centipede crawling amidst his harvested greens.

“Ah, here.” Lord Alexander strides forward with a stick he had procured from the nearby bushes and proceeds to scoop the poisonous thing up. He flicks the stick and the creature away, into the blackberry bushes; the hundred-legged thing vanishes beneath the undergrowth. “Such nasty creatures, but so vital to life’s cycle. As are so many others… Come, lad, we have weeded as much as we can, let us leave them to repopulate the area in peace. You have much still to learn. Unless my girl has been a thorough teacher, in which case you must show me the fruits of her knowledge.”

“We both have a lot to learn, sir, but she was very thorough with what she knew. I only hope to have made her a good student.” He did, when all is said and done, which comes as a great relief. It will not do for him to make such a fool of himself, or to undermine his lady’s capabilities. You will find in him a good and able servant, which is just as well. You are as fine a mistress as he can ever hope to serve.

My lady, my mistress, my duty. It will seem that they all three are one and the same. If you are duty, though, you are not such a poxy bitch now, are you?

“A fountain such as this would work well, don’t you think?”

You consider Yelena’s fount, watching the water spray into air and trickle down stone. The skies above are not so gray as the pool, and don’t threaten rain. It is a good day for gardening. You had offered to replenish Healer Darya’s stores and had seized your chance when the day dawned fine and bright. You had not been long at your labors before Father happened upon you in the green (that was not so green), intending to do his own spot bit of gardening. The company is much welcome. You would’ve invited Eren had he not had the yen to spar the morning away. And it has been a while since you and your father have spoken in a more relaxed setting away from statecraft and policy.

A patch of stink bloom is flowering not a foot from you. You give the plant a wide berth, wrinkling your nose and thanking the gods that you have not stepped on those. They are the most horrid things in the garden by far; curiously (and most ironically), they also make up the stuff of the best perfumes in existence. Everything has its uses, even life’s dregs. You give your father answer at last, “Yes, a fine fountain would be a good idea. It’ll make it more the water gardens you envision, what with the river and all.”

Lord Alexander hums, though his pleasant mien is replaced almost at once with one more regretful. “Yes, I can see it now, the Sphere restored to its old glory, perhaps even better than before! Ah, I should have started years ago, when all was quieter and we could better afford to be extravagant. All those years staying at the place and not once did I see its worth. The gods only know why they sent the curse of yearning a score too late.” He sighs and picks up his pruning shears. “The Lady Zoya had the right of it. War makes misers of us all.”

“You think it will come to that?” 

You are staring back into your own eyes, all of a sudden. The Rhyzkov eyes. Men are wont to say you have your mother’s look, the Dietrich look, yet your eyes are all Rhyzkov.

The Rhyzkov eyes that behold you soften. “Once, there was the sweetest little girl of six tottering about the council chambers. The flagon she carried was half her height and weighed like bricks. She was barely tall enough to see over the table but she did her duty well and ably, never was a better cupbearer ever seen in those parts. That same little girl would bring us joy of a night when she would give her little speeches at dinner. A passage from some political treatise she was too young to understand, a short poem of legends past, whatever the Herald had her recite to ease her tongue and nerves to public speech, all brought us such delight.” Melancholy wistfulness fills those Rhyzkov eyes. “It seemed like such a short time ago, those years of bliss. Now, that little girl is a woman grown.”

“Not just yet,” you are compelled to point out, smiling slightly.

Lord Alexander huffs in amusement. “A year makes no difference, it will pass us by faster than we’d all like.”

“What was war like?”

Something seems to fracture behind those Rhyzkov eyes. The sight wrenches at your heart, but you must know.

“I see you are not to be put off. Admirable in a ruler, inconvenient for the father of that ruler, when she asks the most inconvenient questions.” Father heaves a deep breath, his massive shoulders rising and falling with the action. “I was your age when red war broke out, or near enough as makes no matter. Your lady grandmother was no novice of battle, she had seen her share of transgressors over the years. All of them foreign, as it happened, Cydamae in those days had been hellbent on conquest. We hit them hard enough to scare them off, thank the gods. For this lifetime, at least.

“You will never learn battle as I have, you have been blessed in that, child. It is no easy thing, to take a life with your own hands, to see the light leave their eyes as they enter the ether, to feel their bodies giving way beneath your steel… Or, should I say, it is too easy. People should die harder than that, I remember thinking then. What life you will take will be by your word. Some say that is easier by far, but sometimes, I put that into question. Their ghosts still haunt you all the same… But it is a necessity you have to bear, for the greater good.

“I wish I could tell you more about how it is to rule through such times, but I have never had that chance. Would that your lady grandmother was here with us now. I was only ever her warrior, her soldier, taught to obey commands first and foremost. The ruling came after all was at peace. All I can do is ease the way for you and pass on her wisdom.” The look of melancholy deepens. “With things the way they are these days… Outlanders are not our greatest enemies and never have been. For as long as she has been, Lovaya has contended with enemies from within more often than those from without.”

The skies seem grayer now up above, the wind brisker, chillier. It makes the green rustle louder than before and near muffles the sound of the fountain. “Know that I do not want to see you in such times, child,” Father says, so very softly. “I only hope that this is but a passing shadow, as it has always ever been. I hope I have done well by you, in any case, come what may.”

Come what may. Your fingers wrap about your gardening shears and hold fast. “I won’t fail you, Father.” In that, I have no choice. No choice but to thrive, and succeed, for too much hung in the balance. Your city, your State, your folk.

You stiffen with surprise as Father comes close, bends, and presses his forehead lightly upon yours. For a while, you stay thus, father and daughter taking comfort from the other in this their sacred sanctuary. You close your eyes briefly and take in the beloved scent of solace, of tea and leaves and green growing things, so full of life. You wrap yourself in it, as you had your favorite childhood blanket, the one you could not do without, for without its protection, the monsters in the dark would come and take you away to the deepest hell. You feel the scratchiest of kisses upon your forehead. “You are so very young, sweet child.” Father moves away, and you are a woman grown once more. Or near enough as makes no matter.

“I suppose we had best hurry, if it’s threatening rain. What else must you gather?” Father asks as he turns to his gardening once more.

You appraise your basket, running over the list of herbs in your mind, before replying, “Dittany.”

“Dittany…” Your father beckons you over to a hedge of shrubs lining the righthand parapet of the sanctum. The distinctive gray-green leaves of the healing herb stares up at you from beneath the hedgerows.

“I never thought to see that adage come alive in you,” Father remarks as you bend to cut yourself a clutch of greens.

“What adage?” you ask vaguely, distracted by the pressing task of choosing the best specimen for use.

“The hands of a ruler are the hands of a healer.” Father brushes a gentle hand over your head. “That you shall be, I know, in more ways than one. They will love you well, when you come into your own. The Light of the South, as your grandmother was and her mother before her and all the ruling ladies of Arsechkala there ever was, back to the Queens of Sand and Sea.”

You stand, cradling your basket. The Light of the South. You smile as Father wraps a huge arm around your shoulders and guides you back into the shelter of the palace. No choice but to thrive. No choice but to succeed.

“I hear you’ve been making a Healer out of your knight as well.”

“Well, I had to get him into your good graces somehow,” you laugh, but sober up at once. “He was a very attentive student, picked up things so quickly. He’ll make a fine gardening companion.”

“That he did.” Father herds you into his greenroom so you may start drying herbs. “You can make the sanctum bloom together someday, perhaps even the Sphere, restore it to its bygone glory. Wouldn’t that be pleasant?”

You take up a seat in front of the dark wooden counter and place your basket on the tabletop. “So very pleasant.” Perhaps the both of you can make more than a garden bloom, in time. Come what may, through light and dark, it will be pleasant to have Eren by your side. It won’t be so bad, to walk in darkness with him. You can bear the darkness with him.

---

Across the sea, the sail is growing with every passing minute. Up above, the skies are growing grayer still. The wind, already brisk, forever brisk by the seashore, blows ever more fiercely.

“My lady!” Troian calls from his post by the dunes. “We should go back! The sky will break any moment!”

The ship is so close, yet so far away from the safety of your port. You must see its journey through. “It’s all right, I want to stay. Just a bit longer.”

“You’ll catch a chill if you get soaked!”

It is astonishing how irritating an otherwise heartwarming sentiment can be. “We brought drying sheets this time, didn’t we? And you are well-equipped with that rainshade of yours. We go when I say we go, and not before.”

That brings the galling bleating to an end. “...my lady. Of course, my lady, I meant no offense. Was only doing my duty, beg pardon.”

Guilt makes the frost within melt some. “Pardon granted, no offense was taken. You are only doing your duty, as you said.”

The trepidation vanishes from your sworn sword’s voice. “My thanks, my lady. You need only call whenever you’re ready.”

“Of course.” The blustering wind and the crashing waves are the only sounds to be heard for some time after.

Irritating and galling he may be at times, yet it cannot be said that Troian is a man wanting for duty. And loyalty. And so the tail becomes the shield. Father had chosen your shield well, for all its worth.

“It’s about time you have a shield of your own, my lady, the Liege of Vascalin must always be well-protected,” Lord Alexander had said, a couple of days before he left. “And I know just the man you’ll be needing.” At least he had not needed to look far for the paragon. Childish grievances aside, you cannot have asked for a better shield than Troian. Better him than some cold, aloof sword you cannot talk to; you do not think you can stand another Yelena serving you in close quarters.

A beam of light cuts a trail of white across the pewter skies toward the horizon, from the sea lamp by the docks. Having it lit had been one of your first major commands as ruling Lady. The Lodge you have had opened as well to welcome this galleas to port. A stray ship is an uncommon sight during these times and poses no small amount of risk - were they pirates - but the sail is enough to give them the benefit of the doubt.

Black it is, with the distinctive sleek lines and geometric shapes so favored by the Gleaming Islanders, picked out in silver thread. Perhaps this is the vessel of the new Kayigar ambassador, Prior Ilya had told you, they had been due to arrive some weeks ago but had yet to put in an appearance. Most like they were caught in some storm and are lost, or worse, floating down to rest at the bottom of the sea; you have all but given them up as a lost cause. It is a relief, unexpected but a relief nevertheless, to see those sails appear on the horizon. It will be wise to open the port to receive this one, you all agree. And were they pirates masquerading as ones harmless, the garrison will be more than enough to throw them back to the depths.

Were they the genuine article, though… You roll the green tear around your palm, feeling the slightly pitted but otherwise smooth finish of the glass rubbing against your skin. It will seem the Lady Rhyzkova has guests to entertain. 

An eel slithers quick inside your stomach. Drumming your fingers against it brings it to heel. For the moment.

It is not a hard thing, to entertain guests. There are harder duties to be had than greeting foreign dignitaries. You are equal to the task. You must be equal to the task. You will not shame Father so.

He had left not five days past to answer the royal summons to court. At once, you were apprehensive. This is a first, a very concerning first. The Month of Resting has barely dawned yet already there are summons. Only for the Conclave, Father told you, as though that would reassure you (it does not). He had chosen not to bring the family along, citing your rest and well-being as his priority, he will have you enjoy what time you have away from the bedlam of court for as long as you can.

“Vascalin is yours, my lady,” he said during your leave-taking in the palace courtyard, looking down at you from his gray destrier huge as he was, before calling the march. And so the torch was passed.

You have gone to great lengths not to drop it. Now you find yourself juggling duty and anxiety, wondering what has happened that is so urgent that the king must needs summon his advisors to court a month early.

The Northern Matter, it must be the Northern Matter, nothing else in recent memory has plagued the realm as much as it has. The northern lords must have called their banners and are threatening war.

A cold drop of water splashes onto your forehead. From the sky, not the sea, you note, even through your distraction. You are by the surfline when next you register your surroundings. Seafoam brushes the tips of your toes, cool as ice. The sail has grown even larger.

No, that can’t be right, nothing is confirmed, there is no need to get ahead of yourself. To jump to conclusions so easily ill becomes a ruler. There is no war as yet, not until there is solid, hard evidence of the fact.

But why else would the king call the Conclave? He won’t summon them all just for anything, not for a matter that can keep until the court returns to session. And jumping to conclusions is not all bad - it is prematurely acting on them that ruins many a good liege. You are well within your rights to assume, and consider all your options for all the possibilities open to you. As Father will do.

Eren calls your name from further down the coast. He comes to you at half a walk and half a jog. “Let’s go back, the sky’s about to come down.” 

Come down it does no sooner have the words left his mouth. You shiver as the heavy drops patter against your skin like water made rock - not quite hail but close enough. Yet you make no move to return to your shield and the shelter of his rainshade. You simply watch as Eren draws closer, sodden and tousled.

The both of you had spoken of this political development in great detail the past few days. While he offered interesting insight, and no small amount of comfort, you cannot help but wish he is a bit more politically minded. Eren the Statesman is there, you can sense him, yet he lacks practice and experience in the realm of civic intrigues. While you can coax him further down that road, it will take time. You do not have time, you can’t wait for the reassurance - born of practical, pragmatic, and realistic thinking - that you need at present, much as you would love to receive it from him.

You had written Armin at once, this practical, pragmatic, and realistic friend of yours, and told him all. Well, not all. It is all well and good to speak of the Northern Matter - everyone and their mothers know of it by now. Not everyone is privy to the Conclave’s business, however. If news of their dealings are to be common knowledge, it will not come from you.

Armin had shared your concerns of further conflict yet, ultimately, you can do nothing but wait, wait and see how the tapestry will unfold, and react accordingly. That was his most practical, pragmatic, and realistic answer.

Wait. It seems that you must wait after all. The practical, pragmatic, and realistic answer, it transpired, did little to reassure you.

Eren is before you at last, soaked to the skin as you are. His dark hair is plastered to his head, fringe half-obscuring his eyes. “Look at you, you’re soaked! Why didn’t you run to Troian and his rainshade?” He stares down at you, equal parts fond and exasperated. You stare up at him, silent, merely observing. Half-obscured they may be but still you can see his eyes. They seem more gray than green, today. Gray as the skies above. Gray as the seas below. Such a drab color, you have always thought, yet in him, it isn’t so.

Slowly, the exasperation vanishes the longer he beholds you, until all there is left is soft fondness. He raises a hand and lightly presses his knuckles onto your forehead. “My lady’s in her head again,” he says, mild and quiet, before looking out to sea.

The ship is close to port, close enough for you to see each hoary line and stripe and bar that crisscross the ebon sail. It slips past the distant rocky bluffs soon after, and at last, you know they are safe.

“You’ll do fine, love.” You start as a rough and gentle hand cups your face to turn you away from the distance. “Come what may, the Lady of Vascalin will do what needs to be done. And she will do it well and perfectly.”

Thump, thump, thump.

What have you been thinking, looking to others for comfort? There he is, standing before you, as he has been all this time, saying the right things, as he has always done. What would statesmen know of giving comfort, true and honest, anyway? Eren as he is is enough. You need nothing else.

Rough and gentle fingers stroke your face, his calloused skin warm, warmer than it ought to be in this chill rain. You watch him, silent, so silent, hardly daring to breathe as he begins his tentative study of you. Rough and gentle fingers trace down your cheek, your chin. Your breath hitches in your throat as his thumb brushes the bottom of your lip, the touch light and so very faint, a wisp of a touch, hardly substantial.

More. Touch me more. I need more.

But he is moving on, lower, to your neck. What disappointment that rose within you vanishes as you feel his fingers curl about your neck, feel his thumb press against the hollow of your throat above your black pearl pendant, firm, firm as he had not been with your lips. Your heart lodges itself into your throat. You wonder if he can feel it beating, hammering, pounding beneath his hold.

It feathers across your collarbone, his thumb, in another mild caress. Watching him is the most fascinating thing. For he is as lost in you as you are in him. He runs his hand down your sodden skin as though entranced, caught in a spell of your own making. He seems detached, somehow, yet attentive at the same time as he drags his fingertips lower, lower, until they are stroking the soft swell of the tops of your breasts, partly bared by your red deep-necked vevda. The shiver that courses through you has nothing to do with rain’s chill.

Everything fades and ceases to be. The sea, the rain, the cold, they are as nothing. There is only Eren and his fingers, rough and gentle and sensual as they run down your chest, tracing the curves, sliding below the soft flesh to stroke the skin beneath.

The breath leaves your lungs entirely as he slips past the edge of your dipping neckline, stroking, caressing, feathering over the swell of your breast. The clinging fabric limits his movements and keeps his fingers firm against your flesh as he inches closer and yet closer to your nipple.

Thump, thump, thump.

Your soft intake of breath makes him stop. His eyes seek yours and hold fast, searching. Whatever he sees there makes him retreat, the heat of his fingers parting from your breast. Relief and regret contend within; you do not know which of them you want to win out.

He does not part from you entirely, that much brings you relief. His path continues down your front, across your stomach, until he comes to rest at last at your hip. His fingers curl about you and pull you close.

“We should go. We might catch a chill,” he says, in a voice so deep it sets shivers running through your body once more. But he makes no move to steer you away.

Which is just as well. The rain feels as warm and fresh as a spring shower. You aren't so cold, not anymore. What shivers wrack your frame come not from the weather. “I don’t feel cold.”

The eyes that stare down at you are so very black, those eyes that were once green. Green as the sea glass you had found earlier in the sand. Mermaid’s tears, they call them, and they come in all shades of dazzling colors. Luck brought you one to make a match for your betrothed.

Heaven’s tears cascade upon you in sheets devoid of any one particular hue. You watch as it soaks your betrothed’s face, droplets without count running down his fine features, threading through his hair and dripping, on his cheeks, his nose, his mouth.

A tear, jewel-bright, catches against his bottom lip, making the most mesmerizing sight. Your hands are moving before you quite know it. You pocket the sea’s jewel and raise your hand to give him your touch as well.

The tear slides down your forefinger to mix with the tears upon your skin. His breath is warm, his lips soft. You watch those lips purse and move to kiss your finger, slow and lingering.

You have always loved the way his eyes change color. From green, to blue, to gray, they are ever the colors of the sea. They are black now, black as the sea at midnight, filled with want and so much desire. It is with concerted effort that you draw yourself out of those depths. To drown in him will be the sweetest death yet you have a journey of your own to complete.

Your path continues past his lips, down his chin, to the hollow of his throat - the apple nestled within bobs a little as you pass, scraping your fingernail lightly against the prominence. You trace the crease of his strong chest, made visible by his vee-necked tunic, and lay a hand atop his heart.

Thump, thump, thump.

His cream tunic is near transparent now, the cloth clinging to every ridge and hard crest of his muscled torso and stressing the beauty of him. He is so warm, impossibly so, so very hale, and strong, and alive. Beneath your hand, his heart beats fast, drumming yet steady.

Black eyes draw you in once more, and this time you cannot look away. You are falling, drowning, lost in him. The lips that you had touched, so soft, so yielding, have parted. You can feel him down every inch of your body, he has pressed you up against him, his arms tight about your hips, your waist. His mouth is yielding yet the rest of him is not, you cannot break away even if you want to. And you do not. You do not, not when he is this close, and getting closer still, leaning down…

“My lady! Sir!”

The rain is icy cold again, and the wind is loud in your ears. So is your betrothed’s growl as he snaps his head up to look at the approaching guard. You swallow, your hand fisting against Eren’s shirt, and make to push away from him, despite yourself. The sane and rational within know he will not harm you (never, never), yet the deep and primal in you want to distance yourself from that terrifying visage of animal rage. If looks could kill… But he is iron and immovable, and so you have no choice but to remain within his embrace.

Eren’s mouth has closed and thinned in utter displeasure. “Fucking bloody bugger…” He squeezes your waist and sighs, the fight going out of him with the gesture. “Am I only allowed to kiss you in front of our wedding guests?” he grumbles, sounding so woebegone that your heart goes out to him even as you giggle.

You pat him gently on the chest. “Patience, love. You’ll have your taste soon or late.”

He gleams down at you, smirking a little. “I’ve never been known for my patience, love. I’ll have that taste, sooner rather than later.” He takes your hand from his chest and presses a kiss on the palm. A shock of heat spreads from your hand to the rest of you as you feel his tongue drag across your skin, wet and warm as the rain isn’t. “Sweet,” he murmurs, eyes smoldering up at you, then closes your hand around his kiss and frees you at last from his hold.

Troian comes up to you that very moment, holding the big crimson rainshade aloft and brandishing drying sheets, which you take graciously enough (Eren keeps his temper, at least, you are thankful for that much). You leave for home when you are as dry as you are like to get (which isn’t very dry at all).

The dunes are a trial to traverse with all this rain yet somehow you manage. This is where you had had your first kiss, you recall suddenly. It was yet another one of your customary trips to the beach. Mother was so occupied with the twins and the new babe, Darya, that it had been no difficult feat to stray away from your roost.

Roman had been with you, as he often was those days, being Father’s ward. What began as a simple stroll to collect shells somehow ended up becoming a game of Hawk and Chicken. It had been such a merry chase, made all the more merrier when you caught the chicken at last. Before either hawk or chicken knew it, though, they were tumbling down the dunes, you had been so enthusiastic in your role of raptor. When the world stopped spinning at last, you found that you had landed on the chicken with your mouth pressed firmly to his.

The days afterward had been nothing short of awkward yet the seeds of curiosity had taken root. You had not been able to take your mind off the kiss and the feel of a boy’s mouth on yours, so you had sought Roman out and kissed him again to see if you truly liked it some. You liked it more than some, it transpired, and so did he. The days of stolen kisses began not long after.

That is a tale you have yet to divulge to your jealous knight - you do not want Roman’s inevitable mauling to be on your conscience.

You have been writing each other as is your wont during the reprieve, as Eren will write Armin. That, too, you have not divulged, but Eren has never been interested in who you are corresponding with besides Armin; useless to give answers when no questions are asked. The Lady Meledina is getting worse, you learn from her worried yet resigned son, it is only a matter of time ‘til he ascends the Masquer’s Seat. That is the most dismal letter you have received this season.

You smile despite the gray turn of your thoughts as Eren drops his drying sheet over your head in a fit of gallantry and waves away your concerns about his well-being (what if he gets sick? He is too fit for that, apparently). The hand that holds his kiss, and a corner of your drying sheet, still burns. You flex the fingers within the damp linen. Yet another secret, stolen kiss. It seems that you are meant for stolen kisses.

Not for long. The thought buoys your steps onward and upward. You will have all the kisses you can possibly want, in full view of everyone. They cannot begrudge a young wife her husband’s kisses, after all.

Perhaps it isn’t so bad a thing, to miss that kiss. Another first had happened here, another memory is attached here, that of another kiss with another boy. You’ll have your kiss in a place all your own, a place free of another first, another memory, another boy. A place where you can have your own first and new memories with the one whom your soul…

“Oh, gods be damned.” Eren is tugging you hurriedly onward, away from the dunes as fast as he can while impatiently waving Troian over, urging him to pick up the pace so he can keep you shielded from the driving rain.

“What’s wrong?” you ask, worried and stumbling along in your knight’s trail. Should’ve worn a shorter vevda, you think for the hundredth time as you fight not to trip over your lengthy skirt. You did not come to the beach to go wading, yet you did not anticipate having to make a mad dash for home.

“Nasty buggers nearby.”

A bloom of them has manifested not too far from the dunes, sure enough, spectral sea jellies with huge pearly white caps and long deadly stingers, floating aimlessly across the sands. “They’re only deadly when crossed, and I have no intentions of doing so, I promise you,” you tell Eren. “There’s no need to rush, surely.”

He grunts non-committally, yet does not slow.

“Just how badly did it go for you the last time you ran afoul of the nasty buggers?” you query, remembering his words from the lakeside of Shimmerwood, weeks and weeks and weeks ago now. It is not something to laugh at, you know, yet you can’t help the small smile that tugs at your lips.

“Always wondered why Armin didn’t tell you that, it was the most entertaining thing. He couldn’t stop laughing at the time, anyway.” His face pinks such a pretty shade made more conspicuous by the gray dullness of the world. “You’ll have the tale from me… someday.”

“I can always write or ask him myself, you know.”

“Argh, my lady, just-” He sighs, shoulders slumping in defeat. The quick succession of expressions flitting across his face is most amusing. “It’ll be better coming from me,” he says at last, resigned. “I’ll tell you. Tonight. I’ll be your dinnertime amusement.”

You giggle and hold on to him the tighter. “On your word as a knight?”

“On my word as a knight.” Behind his exasperated resignation is no small amount of mirth.

The rain seems to be letting up some, you notice as you approach the sea gate. The guards salute you and inform you that the Kayigar ship has just docked; the customs officer is, as of this very moment, determining its legitimacy as a true diplomatic ship.

Duty and reality set in once more, yet they are not so frightening, not this time. You feel Eren’s hand squeeze yours and your soul sings. You are equal to the task, there never was any doubt about that.

---

Footsteps echo through the chamber as the steward and your guests climb the steps to the audience hall. But for that, the place is silent.

Not so, you realize. Drums are pounding in the deep, thrashing, booming loud in your ears, boom, doom, boom, doom, yet somehow, no one seems to give it any heed. It is a long while before the dawn breaks. What drums there are in the hall come from inside your chest. Still, the silence is so complete it is a wonder to you that no one can hear your private symphony.

Boom, doom, boom, doom.

Your bejeweled fingers grip the wreath of welcome on your lap, your only anchor, the only thing close at hand to keep you steady. Your true anchor is off to the side of the chamber with the rest of your little court. For the thousandth time, you wish he is up here with you. Only consorts have the right to stand on the dais with their ruling spouses, however, and it will be some time still ‘til that happy day of nuptial bliss. You must needs face your guests alone.

You suppress a sigh, clutch at the wreath just that bit tighter, and allow your eyes to flicker over to your betrothed. Not once did you feel his gaze leave you, and for that you are grateful. He has a blazing look on his face, hard almost, and filled with pride, so much pride that you feel yourself become emboldened as though you have imbibed the most potent of tonics. No tonic would be as revitalizing as that gaze, though, that you know without a doubt.

It seems such a ludicrous thing now, your trepidation. They are only guests, and no one to fear. You are equal to this task.

“My lady.” Paul Kolas the steward strides to the foot of the Golden Chair’s high dais, his usually thin voice coming loud and strong. “The High Marked and High Honorable Ambassador of the Gleaming Isles of Kayigari, Onyankopon, son of Ata Panin, of the Shavelocks,” he announces in the Diplomats’ Tongue, stumbling a little at the foreign, unfamiliar name but otherwise delivering a perfect introduction.

The Lady of Vascalin smiles most graciously and stands from her seat. “Your Honor, my lords,” you begin, mirroring your steward and speaking in kind, “I give you welcome to fair Lovaya and her beloved daughter Vascalin. In the sight of gods and men, I offer you the hospitality of our halls.” You raise the wreath, and at once, a group of servants set forth to crown your most exalted guests and offer them fare - slices of lamb and wine - to strengthen their rights to krajü.

Each man of the delegation has his head shaved clean, as only those of the black-skinned clan of Shavelocks could be. Of the seven Kayigar clans, the Shavelocks are deemed the least opulent, the simplest of the Islanders. Compared to their brethren of Goldveins and Proudmarks and all the rest of them, they eschew finery; His Honor, Onyankopon, in his robes of black and silver satin, is the very picture of quiet elegance.

“My most gracious lady, I thank you kindly for this warmest of welcomes.” His Honor dips into a deep bow and rises, smiling, his voice smooth and made more liquid by the refined inflections of the tongue of diplomacy. “We were led to believe that we would be received by Vascalin’s illustrious lord but here I see the most beautiful of women come to honor us with her beloved presence instead. Manu be praised, I did not think to bathe in the Light of the South’s radiance so soon.”

You laugh, soft and mannerly. “I thank you kindly for those loveliest of words, Your Honor. You are a credit to your trade, indeed. My lord father has received a most urgent summons, one that he must needs answer, and so he left me to rule in his stead.” Once the initial pleasantries have been spent, you go on, “We are most glad to see you well and whole, my lords. I must confess, we were most worried. The autumn storms are not known for their mercy.”

“Manu has blessed our voyage, and blessed us with the most excellent captain.” Onyankopon ushers forward a green-robed man, who bows and smiles, proud and humble both.

“A more blessed lot I have never seen.” You gesture at Paul, who strides forward at once. “You are weary, I know, from such a hard and dangerous voyage. A suite of chambers awaits you in the guest wing, where you can rest and recuperate at last. I took the liberty of having a feast prepared. They are taxing things, especially after a strenuous journey, but I hope you will honor us with your presence at table tonight.”

“Of course, my lady, we look forward to doing your excellent Lovayan fare justice.”

That is not half-bad, you think as you watch Paul escort your guests to their chambers, exulting and allowing yourself to feel some measure of pride. By the steps of the high dais stands Eren, gazing up at you with the same proud, hard, blazing look on his face that he beheld you with earlier.

You descend to meet him with a smile more genuine than any you had yet made during the audience.

That was not half-bad at all.

---

“My lady.”

You glance toward the drawn red velvet hangings of your bedchamber, surprised to hear Troian’s muffled call. Yelena is standing in front of you, fastening your sheer emerald-studded podonza to your left shoulder with a brooch of emerald, round-cut and ornamented with silver wings.

“What is it?” you answer, as Yelena finishes and steps away with a bow.

“Sir Eren’s calling. Should I send him in?”

“Ah, yes, please.” The sheer strength of your joy at the prospect of seeing your dear knight once more would have surprised you, once. Not at present, never again.

“I have come to worship at the shrine of beauty,” Eren declares, bowing an exceedingly low bow when you emerge from your bedroom.

“Oh, hush, you,” you giggle, dismissing Yelena and watching her cross the privy chamber to take her leave. Troian is standing by the entry hall a respectable distance away, keeping a close watch. 

“You didn’t change,” you note, eyeing your betrothed’s ensemble, the very same he had worn for the ambassador’s audience: a gold-trimmed vevda of red-violet with sleeves that fall to his elbows, paired with a podonza of gold brocade, fastened to his left shoulder by a square-cut tourmaline brooch. The wreath that circles his dark head is plain gold. He looks very much a prince tonight, you think, dreamily.

He snorts at your words in the most un-prince-like manner. But you won’t have him any other way. “I didn’t run a cavalry charge, did I? Didn’t make a mess of myself all day, I promise you, my lady. These threads still serve.”

You lean in close and take a whiff of him. Wood, the faint scent of laundry soap and sweat, Eren. All good scents. “Still smell nice, at least.”

He smiles and looks about the room. His expression softens. “You put them up already.” He walks to a framed bunch of moon violets on the wall opposite and examines them, running a hand down the gilt mounting, lost in memory.

You move to stand next to him, sharing in his thoughts. “I can never thank you enough for these.”

“You are most welcome, my lady. You deserve every single one. The land’s beauties for the land’s beauty.”

“Perhaps you should hang up your sword and take up a pen instead. Are you sure you’re not a poet?” You laugh as he pinches your side.

“Truth, love, no poetry.” His head swings slowly about as he searches each frame. “I know that was a long time ago and we weren’t exactly… partial to each other then, but did you keep-”

“They’re in there,” you nod to your bedchamber.

Something flashes across his face, something more than memory. “I haven’t told you, have I? Zeke was the one who told me to get you flowers. Most useful bit of advice I’ve ever gotten from him,” he says with the immediate disrespect of a younger brother. You shake your head at him, cheeks hurting from smiling so much. “I wasn’t too enthusiastic about the idea,” he shoots you a contrite look, which you pardon, waving him on, “but I saw the sense of that. Girls like flowers, don’t they? Took a quick look at the gardens, but all the flowers in bloom seemed… boring? Inadequate? Not enough? Only the winter roses stood out to me. They’re supposed to be a winter bloom but they were still there in the spring, living, fighting on until the very last cold snap.”

Still so very Eren, even with his choice of flowers. His account warms you to the very core. He put thought into his offering, though he knew you not, though he liked you not. Most boys would make do. But not him. Thank the gods I did not neglect his gift. His first gift. You suppose you have much to thank your future brother by marriage for. “Your brother’s rather romantic for someone who hates his wife.”

“I would never.”

Eren sounds a deal more serious, then, graver. You blink up at him, puzzled. “Never what?”

“Hate you. Not like he does Elva. I could never.” He turns so he can face you properly. At once, your heart begins to drum.

Thump, thump, thump.

“You are so very beautiful, my lady,” he murmurs and brings up a hand to run long, slender fingers through a loose curl, escaped from your bun. “My Lady of Rhyzkov is a woman of emerald tonight.” His eyes alight on the emerald rose that holds your tresses in place, before running slowly down your body in its opulent trappings of silver and emerald satin.

You feel that stare as if he had run his hands all over you. He almost had, that selfsame day. When he takes up a hand to kiss, you feel his mouth on your lips, your neck, your breasts. 

Desire rises hot in you once more. Your bed is so close, you realize, it will be so easy to draw him in, lead him past those velvet curtains and let your lust take hold at last. Again, and again, and yet again. After all, that is what the marriage bed is for. Our marriage bed. The insight brings another shock of heat through you. You will never look at your kip the same way ever again.

“May I have the honor of leading you in tonight?” Winter sets in when he withdraws and offers you his arm. The temptation to let them all bugger themselves and eat without you and your betrothed is a strong one, yet duty’s voice is stronger still.

You sigh and take his arm. “Of course, good Sir. Back to the slog of pleasantries and politics we go.”

“You did wonderfully, love, didn’t I say? It was a good start. And a good start will lead to a good path.”

You certainly hope so.

As the feast proceeds underway, with your Eren on your left and His Honor to your right in the place of high honor, you can see the truth of your knight’s words. Everything goes smooth as glass. It isn’t a bad start at all, you feel. Not half-bad at all.

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

---

A/N:

Duty, duty, duty. It starts for the little lady. What *is* going on in the court?

Eren hangs out with the future father-in-law (he's not so bad, heh) and reminded of his duties to you, anxiety sets in as duty starts to make itself known, and we start to see how YN will be as a lady ruling in her own right. So far, so good.

And things get that much hotter between the young lovers-not-lovers. Yet another kiss foiled, they really should stop taking it slow, yeah? And I would so love to see them kiss in the rain, nothing is more romantic...

Til next update!

Tagging: @princess-okkotsu @lukepattersin @tojis-discord-kitten @camilo-uwu

[loving-jack-kelly]

what are ur fav javid fics? 👀 currently recovering from a surgery

(alternate title to this post is me realizing for at least the fifth time that I haven't bookmarked all of my favorites lol)

i have so many favorites and there are so many good ones but! the mainstays that I go back to over and over:

There Jack Stayed by Claycastles who I'm pretty sure has a tumblr but I'm not sure enough to tag them. A very sweet semi-slowburn where canon-era Jack is the ghost haunting modern Davey's apartment. A little sad, but has a happy ending and is genuinely one of my favorite fics I've ever read!

blue moon by illinoise who i also don't know if I can tag on tumblr! (I have now been informed that illinoise is @livingchancy) Also a very sweet modern au where Davey's roommate ad results in Jack moving in and trying to hide that he has a daughter. Also one of my very favorites that I've ever read.

too many colours (enough to drive all of us insane) by @thefactsofthematter! Truly a magnum opus in my opinion it's just so good. Modern au Jack and Davey are roommates, Jack has no idea he's into guys until he does, just really well written mental health stuff and relationships and characterizations and I Adore it so much

Tied Together by @penzyroamin which is a small-town modern soulmate au! It's not all happy-go-lucky and fun soulmate stuff, but it does have a happy ending and I Love the characterizations in it. Just so good.

and then there's you (oh what a world) also by @thefactsofthematter! an Olympic au where Jack is a diver and Davey plays water polo. Very fun, light-hearted, just a joy to read. I've probably read it like four or five times at this point lol

The Substitute by @landlessbud! A Prohibition au where Jack runs a speakeasy and Davey is a bootlegger with the mob. It's such a cool take on the characters and a different historical setting than canon without being fully modern. There's also a sequel/alternate perspective in progress fic called The Heir which is set in the same universe!

And if I may plug a few of my own that I'm still very happy with:

Days Long Past which is a sort of ghost fic inspired by There Jack Stayed. Jack is a memory tied to a sketchbook.

By My Sword, a royalty au where Davey is a prince and Jack is his swordsmanship instructor.

The One That Got Away which is about Jack and Davey reconnecting after years apart.

if you never look (you don't know what you'll find) which is my most recent fic and it's a college au!

[apopcornkernel]

trick or treat!! 🎃🦇 (btw i loved hearing about the backstory/historical aspects of your fav wip, i’m not even in the hsr fandom but it’s so interesting)

THANK YOU <33333

(i know it's literally november 3 but shhhhh, all soul's was just yesterday it still counts—)

anyways!! the next fic i wanna talk about is... also jingfu 😭😭😭 this is embarrassing

presenting: ✨ jingfu vegas wedding ✨

there was a time i got back into asoiaf and jaime/brienne, and there's this subgenre of jb fics where they get quickly married on the quiet isle for one reason or another! and i just got obsessed with this type of wedding, and then i got to thinking about vegas weddings, and then i imagined jingfu drunk and giggly and happy and my gdocs stood NO chance

what's great about jingfu is, as i hope to never stop reminding my readers, is that they're chinese living in a chinese setting wifh chinese culture. so you can't just throw them into an actual vegas wedding situation—china has its own wedding ceremonies and the luofu must have its own technological advancements in that area too! so long story short i had a lot of fun brainstorming the wedding rituals and how it would mesh with the luofu, how people would even discover a wedding has taken place considering chinese weddings CAN technically be done without witnesses if you're feeling quirky enough (like maybe legally it's not allowed but ive seen cdramas where they do the same thing so like. me 🤝 cdramas; ignoring things for dramatic flair), and generally just trying to write their world vividly enough that it doesn't feel like Vague American Fantasy Spaceship #2432

i do think i kinda succeeded!! and even if i didn't, well, in my head i can clearly visualize it and in the end this is a fic for ME and not for yall, sorry but i come first when it comes to my fanfic :P

also i wrote my thoughts on the au while we were out with paternal relatives eating hotpot, so of course their drunken wedding feast is hotpot. i couldn't resist

It was strange to see the General and Master Diviner drinking, and even stranger to see them drinking like they were racing to their graves.

At least it would be. Extenuating circumstances, Dan Heng art thy name.

i also really like these lines i giggle everytime! because i ship jingfu but i also ship jingheng in the pathetic unrequited pining old man jing yuan kinda way.... its hilarious how down bad jing yuan still is for dan heng/dan feng and so since i needed a catalyst for the drinking i used dan heng hehe

also i researched chinese constellations for this because i needed more drunk activities and i figured i could do one of those "laying on the grass and pointing at the stars" except ofc it's the luofu so that's synthetic grass and false stars and their stars are also different and it would be very weird to mention ursa major or something! so i had to do research </3 i swear the things i do for my craft

i don't know how to end this.... i guess here's another excerpt HAHAHA

Jing Yuan, thanks be to Lan, had left behind some of his formal clothes at her residence, which meant the two of them did not have to sneak all the way back to Exalting Sanctum just to nab the appropriate garments. If they had not been drunk, the journey from the gardens to her quarters would not have taken so long. Unfortunately: they were. Unfortunately: Jing Yuan was enamored with every flower that passed him by, and Fu Xuan was busy counting the number of off-color stones in the cobbled path.

They did still make it there. Eventually.

In one of Fu Xuan’s many closets were the robes they’d worn to Qixi-jie—his a simple but elegant grey trimmed with white, and hers a dainty pink, complete with a round embroidered fan. Fu Xuan took Jing Yuan’s out, shoved it into his arms, and then shoved him out. He staggered out into the hallway, and then turned to blink at her, lost.

Fu Xuan rolled her eyes. “Well? What are you waiting for?”

“Oh,” Jing Yuan said. The light came back into his eyes. “Oh! Yes.”

Stupid, she thought, and closed the door. But apparently she’d said it out loud, because he yelled, muffled, “You’re the one marrying me!”

“I won’t if you don’t shut up!” Fu Xuan yelled back.

Immediate silence.

thank you for the ask again hehehe <3

[purple-iris]

20 questions for Writers!

been tagged by @sinvulkt in this awesome Tag game! thanks a lot!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Currently, I have a 19 works on AO3, working on making it 20 by the end of this month

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

Im at 131,179 words. Considering I have a few smaller works it makes sense

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I mainly write in the Star Wars fandom and Hetalia (but as of now solely fics that feature my APH Québec OC) But I have fics in the Good Omens fandom, Heathers the Musical, Five Nights at Freddy's Loki (TV), and I am currently writing a Harry Potter longshot

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Ring of Fire, the first part of my Deserter Darth Vader AU

What Are You Waiting For, a tragic Heather Chandler/Veronica Sawyer fic

Whatever's still to come, my Elizabeth Afton Lives au in the FNAF fandom

More beautiful than flowers... , a FrUK fic with lots of flower language.

Truth for the Daughter, where Leia finds out who Anakin Skywalker used to be in my Deserter Darth Vader AU

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I always try to respond to my comments, since I don't get so many, they are always welcome. I enjoy the feedback and the compliments, and I always want to respond! <3

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

What Are You Waiting For is definitely up there, considering one of the character of the main pairing is dead from the start.

I also have two super short fics in french about my Hetalia OC Québec that I consider gut wrenching, but they haven't been read much

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

The World We Knew, my Good Omens fix it fic after the devastating season 2 finale. it definitely has a lot of angst in it too, but the ending is pure fluff!

8. Do you get hate on your fic?

It has never happened, but at the same time I'm not a big author either.

9. Do you write smut?

I tried once, didn't go through with it. It was for a FrUK fic, which I didn't really like and deleted.

10. Do you write crossovers?

Before posting on AO3, it happened, it was a Marvel characters in Hogwarts thing.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

No, but once again, I'm not very well known.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I wish!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Yeah, the Marvel at Hogwarts thing a lifetime ago. And also a historical fiction that never got posted anywhere.

14. What‘s your all-time favourite ship?

Oooh that's a tough one! It varies like each months or so. I think I haven't even written much for it directly, but Anidala!

15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

My FNAF fic. I have a super long and detailed AU outline with complexe character growth and tons of family angst with the Afton and Lizzy eventually taking over Fazbear Entertainement, but I lack time. In the meantime, I made a few artworks of it under the tag elizabeth afton lives au if you are interested.

16. What’s your writing strengths?

I'd say the inner monologue and the highly emotional scenes. I love to delve on the psyche and add parallels that hurt just write and use gut wrenching metaphors.

17. What’s your writing weaknesses?

Highly action dense scenes. I struggle with the pacing because I picture it clearly in my mind and can't put it into words.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

It can be nice, but considering that sometime I see it with my own language, French, and with considerable mistakes, it can be annoying. I'd avise to contact someone who speaks that language a bit to crossverify google translate, that's much more fun for speakers

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Surprisingly enough, BBC Sherlock. The fic was on Wattpad and I haven't reposted it, it was a bit mid not going to lie.

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

Not very controversial take, my favourite fic I've ever written is Truth for the Daughter. I've written it in the kitchen, with my own step-dad checking up on me as I struggled with some scenes. It may be full of father-daughter angst but it was written with a lot of father-daughter love. It is dedicated to my step-dad, who passed away last year because of that, and so is Interlude: A son and his father , which I completed not long before his passing. These parental fics just hold a special place in my heart <3

Well this was nice!

To conclude, I'd like to tag : @dreamingamongthestars @yaqamole @claralarmclock @phe-oh-no and any other author mutual I might have forgotten!!

[constantfragmentation]

hey, just came here to tell you that i'm so so relieved that i was able to find your blog again !! and your jane eyre au fanfic with silco !! honestly, 'bend but not break' was (and still pretty much is) one of my favourite fanfics ever; not aus or silco fanfics, i mean one of THE best fanfics i've ever read. cannot even begin to describe how sad i was when i lost the ao3 link, and when i wasn't able to remember your blog's url.

and it was a shame, because BBNB was just *chef's kiss* 🤌. i literally stayed awake until sunrise reading it the first time, already getting inpatient for the next chapter. and i think it's mainly because you capture silco so so well, and you get 'jane eyre'; and you capture the dreadful air of the novel, and those little acts of tenderness and romance... and your smut it's quite great too. like, i still can't get over The Opera chapter, even after all this time 👀👀

still, now that i did find you, i'm not only gonna read that one, but i'm gonna get started on all your other works !! i know i'm getting repetitive but i just don't know how to express just how great i think your writing is. so for now, i just hope you get to read this !!

hope i didn't weird you out or anything !! please, have a great day, and stay safe <33

p.s.: i'm gonna read bbnb rn, until sunrise if necessary, just like in the good old days !! so if you hear someone's heart breaking, it might be mine !!

Omg?! Thank you! No, you are not weirding me out in any way.

I am so very humbled. You have no idea. I'm still learning as a writer, and I am my own worst critic.

I'm sorry I haven't been online to respond to this earlier because I've been really sick with the flu and binge watching Poldark (again).

I've been technically writing fiction since 2015 and it's been a learning curve with each story. For some odd reason, historical eras seem to fit my style in writing. I can do modern but this era I feel like I can sink my teeth into it.

I'm a huge fan of gothic horror/suspense/romance. So, yeah, I guess you can see that in the choices I make.

I must admit I'm not all together happy with the last chapter of BBNB, I might want to change some things in that chapter before moving on (maybe because it might meld into the next chapter better? idk).

Even though I have approximately 5-6 chapters (depending on how big the chapters get, I'm terrible about posting novel-length chapters) left in Bend, it should be an emotional rollercoaster. There are soooo many things I have left to run with before it ends.

As of the lastest chapter, I'm deviating from Jane Eyre a bit, while still holding onto certain plot-points for context but I want to play more with the Regency Arcane/Silco's world.

I do have other ideas for Silco stories I want to write. One will deal with a younger, hot-head SIlco. Another I'm tempted to play with a Roaring 20's Underground.

Then I have a story that I'm developing into an original gothic novel. I have maybe too much on my plate. LOL

It's moments like this when I wish I didn't have to 'work' a regular job to pay the bills because I would literally write all day, every day.

I can't tell you how much I appreciate you sending me this. It really does brighten my day. That may sound cliche, but it does. I admit I don't have the greatest self-esteem, but I'm working on it.

That someone likes something I've written that much to comment at all and tell me they're re-reading it... my heart is going to explode.

I am working on both Regency Silco stories. When my head doesn't feel like a fog-horn inside of a 100lb bowling ball, I should be in a better space to be creative. It's zapped when you feel exhausted. Working 60hr weeks lately probably hasn't helped my health any.

Thank you again sooooo much for this. Never feel like you're bothering me or weirding me out. I love and embrace all comments, good or critical.

[rhaenys-queenofkhyrulzz]

mctna modern au headcannon

Since the show is set in historical times, it’s safe to say that the ideals/norms of that society would somewhat apply to the characters. Hence our boys’ long flowing hair. This will be a long post focusing on that so fair warning.

If this were a research paper, I’d get yelled at for using wikipedia as my source but I think the info is well enough known for me to get away with it. 

Historically, East Asian cultures viewed long hair as a sign of youth and aesthetic beauty. Long hair is associated with private life and sexuality.

In ancient China and Korea, hair was regarded as a precious legacy from parents. Most people would never cut their hair after they became adults, and cutting off one's hair was a penalty for minor crimes.

Even today, South Korea is still a comparatively traditional and conservative society. Not to the same degree with hair however.

At about an hour before midnight on December 30, 1895, King Gojong became one of the first victims of reforms that were to take place on Jan. 1. The most troubling of these reforms was the edict that all Korean men were to have their top-knots removed.

In the late 19th century, the Korean empire under Japanese colonial rule had to go through many reforms- one of which was that men had to cut the very (long) hair that had for centuries held great traditional and social value. 

You’re probably wondering where all this is going. Here’s the bridge in reasoning: 

Hair length regulations have a long history in Korea. In the 1970s, President Park Chung Hee’s military regime viewed long hair as decadent, associated with the “hippie” lifestyle. There were strict rules regarding school attire and hair length, and the male students’ hairstyle was close to an army cut.

By the time my au is set in 2023, let’s assume that the mctna gang are the same relative age as WDH and YSJ in real life. Working with that timeline, Nam Jeon (and assuming that he would’ve been around 32 or so when Seon-ho was born) would definitely have been a skl boy around the 1970s following the same ideals. 

Basically, despite traditions going a complete 180, Nam Jeon is still someone who is greatly influenced by the idea of tradition and societal perception- especially when it comes to things that he expressly believes in. 

That’s why I think that in a modern au, he would’ve definitely forced Seon-ho to keep his hair short throughout his childhood and teenage years.  It’s only once Seon-ho goes off into the world on his own, trying to stay the hell away from Nam Jeon and anything related to him, he starts fighting back with the little things too. Once he completes his mandatory military service, the easiest and most blatant thing he can do at first is to start growing out his hair. So he does.

Despite having to do a lot of work on his own to support himself financially now [goddamnit Hwi just because I’m staying with you doesn’t mean I’m not gonna try to help pay for the extra groceries and added bills], he makes time to care for his hair and, after a while, he realises that it feels good to see something that he’s nurtured yield results. It becomes sort of like a project to him in the way that gardening might be for others and he genuinely enjoys it now.

At the point when our au starts in 2023, his hair is about three quarters as long as it was in canon and Hwi (who joined in on the long hair train cuz he’s just laid back and chill like that) now has a relatively long ponytail of his own.

Anyways, all that to say I think our boys would have long hair ;)