#but pointing this out because it's in the oriented aroace tag)

[unrestrainedbalderdash]

NOOO WHY'S THERE BI LESBIAN EXCLUSION IN THE ORIENTED AROACE TAG.

[mattdevil]

Saw this discussion in the jayvik tag and wanted to wade in:

I think the larger problem with the "Viktor is ace!" "Ace people can still like sex/romance!" discourse is that the Viktor-being-ace bit hit a lot of people, myself included, as a kneejerk reaction from CL to try and kibosh any and all mention of there being ~something more~ between the two. It was treated as a "gotcha" in a way that implies CL doesn't have a good understanding of aspec identities, and I think a lot of people had very strong reactions to that; so in an attempt to counter what feels like bad faith stereotyping, the pendulum gets swung too far back the other direction with the unfortunate side effect of making it seem like everyone participating believes that ALL aspec folks can, or even should, also participate in sexual or romantic relationships. I think if he'd said "hey it's cool you see it that way, our intent was to have V be aroace with no interest in sexual or romantic relationships because that is criminally underrepresented in media" (which is true), there would have been a very different reaction. There were two missing elements: an expression or acknowledgement of deeper understanding of aspec identities, and a willingness to accept that creative intent doesn't somehow trump or disenfranchise how your audience receives it. He missed on both, so now we are here.

Yeah you're totally right.

I agree with the valid criticisms of what Linke did. I don't think he actually knows the difference between asexual and aromantic. Based on what he said, he just asked around about which orientation was underrepresented anyways and he seem to have gone into this with minimal research, which made this maybe well intentioned attempt at ace representation turn into a shitshow. Because I agree with him in viewing Jayvik as a platonic ship gives the dynamic a fresh spin. I believe he actually intended to make Viktor aroace, but it was kind of a shitty move to reveal this as a way of bashing all the other interpretations, which made a lot of people perceive it as homophobic as this was done in response to shippers.

People are also upset with the stereotypical implications Viktor being ace implies, such as making disabled characters ace which makes them seem devoid of sexuality.

That being said, I think a lot of people have lost the plot too because Linke is now being accused with being ableist, homophobic and aphobic a lot more than what's proportional. I've seen people say he only made Viktor asexual because he is disabled and "robotic", because he saw Viktor as undesirable and quite inhuman. These are bullshit takes and people are pulling them out of nowhere imo. I have never seen anything suggesting Linke viewing Viktor's disability as something negative. Calling him a robot is outright wrong too because he got merged with the arcane, he didn't robotise himself like in the games. So none of these really contribute to Viktor's "negative" representation. Also, Linke could very well be homophobic but it kinda doesn't seem quite anormal for creators to talk about the intended details in the show after the show is over, so I don't think he did that reveal at a very odd point. Which now got me wondering aside from giving the homophobic fans the excuse to bash Jayvik shippers, whether we jumped the gun on calling him homophobic too.

I also agree with how the reactions would be a lot better if Linke handled the creative intent speech a lot better, but I'm not sure if it still would've made stop everyone from saying "hey even if he is asexual he can still have sex with Jayce" because this is just what shipping culture is like. As I've talked about it on the previous ask, people LOVE shipping, and they make aspec characters a part of this phenomenon regardless of how their sexual or romantic desires are presented in the source material.

Overall I agree with what you're saying though. Thank you for your insight.

[skeletalroses]

The posts on your blog about not trusting allo aspecs (as an aroace person) is so true. Because why are so many wlw and mlm alloaros and alloaces still insisting that asexuality and aromanticism are "just modifiers to someone's Real orientation" and not inherently queer labels. And that aroaces aren't really queer because we aren't "same gender attracted". Who gave them the right to judge if other aspecs are queer enough or not. It's literally fucking 2024.

Unsurprising that those pick-me-ass bootlickers are coming out of the woodwork again. They were everywhere during Tumblr's aphobia heyday and it looks like we're gearing up for a second wave.

Allo aspecs get SO MAD when you point out that they're not immune to harboring the same kinds of aphobia that non-aspec allos do. I made a post about it years ago and got ratioed by a bunch of alloaro teenagers who couldn't cope with the prospect that they as allosexuals might still have to check themselves for acephobia (alloaces didn't interact at all). Hell, aroaces can't even mention asexuality in the "aromantic" tag or aromanticism in the "asexual" tag without a slew of allo aspecs throwing a shit fit about it. And then everyone acts like aroaces have some kind of net privilege over allo aspecs, so we get blamed for their invisibility and all inter- and intracommunity problems.

Alloromantic aces still treat aros the way alloros treat aros and allosexual aros still treat aces the way allosexuals treat aces. I Don't Fucking Trust Them.

[olderthannetfic]

Flipside of own voice and authenticity is when the person wants to be viewed as THE source and top of the experience. Doesn't really need to be explicitly labelled like that either, it's often about how it's presented.

In queer space I noticed baby gays have a problem with that, even when covering things that they're not even affected by. Like saying that top bottom doesn't exist. It's heteronormative for a gay guy to like femme men. Etc, they wanna be the source for own voice/authentic so bad, but they just keep saying bullshit. Then you have a big reaction from the queer space calling it out, and then it gets messy.

Alice Oseman is Imo an example in literature. I don't think she's labelled herself as own voice, but she has the atittude of accuracy in her own writing, and I've seen it tagged own voice in some reviews. She praises her own ass for how she wrote two gay characters, shits on everyone else, especially Yaoi for how female-oriented it is, but then gets mega butthurt she got feedback that actual gay men categorize her writing as "written for women".

Then her big mad moment when someone asked about how the gay teens would experience their sexuality and sex, because she thought it was gross as an AroAce woman... who claims to be writing for gay guys, and more accurately than any other woman at that. Gay teen boys at that. It feels like a hallmark problem with "queer own voice" and "queer authenticity" where the queer person in question has nothing to do with the queer experience they wrote about, and gets angry when that's pointed out.

Same can happen with POC authors, or honestly anyone writing a thing that they're not actually into but think they understand. But the queer thing was easier to give an example for.

--

[captainbobbin]

Hi- I have somehow survived the depths of completing a whole game in one sitting, grinding for the talents of a character in another game, and completing one of 3 endings for undertale as well as attempting to art. So how are you? <3

Also would love to make you aware your Saix/isa, Xemnas, and Terra are the reasons I question if I'm truly AroAce because of the FOUL, down right HEINOUS things I want them to do to me.

Also, I was going to ask this on Retrospring but I have no idea if the ask button was either tricking me by looking like it was doing nothing or if it just wasn’t up to doing its job, but, I scroll through the Saix tags often and there was this one post that pointed out that he has a hourglass figure and I could not for the life of me tell if you draw him with one too or not so, are you aware of this? If I’m wrong about him having that figure or if you do actually draw him with one then you can just ignore this.

Also, finally looked at your twitter since I don’t usually use it and there was this one thing you said and while I can’t exactly pinpoint what it was I know it was enough to make me audibly gasp and then mentally agree. Anyways that’s all, have a good night or morning I’m still trying to figure out time differences. (Also if I ramble too much feel free to tell me I’ll gladly shut up a bit….maybe- I can’t even trust myself to remember to breathe actually so- nvm)

long response so -

ayyy I'm glad that you've been doing okay lately bud - its always satisfying to complete a game that you've been sucked into, and I hope you had a fun time with it!

You know. You'd be surprised how many aro and/or ace people have said such things to me/are actively in my chat encouraging me to make more nsfw content regarding my blorbos lmaoooo I actually had a message on retrospring the other day regarding my portrayals of certain characters making people question their orientation and I'll put what I responded to them here - 'there's a post that I love and its like. If you are really into something and are passionate about it, you will accidentally convert others to enjoying it. By making content where you genuinely show how much you love a certain thing and you project your headcanons onto it and display the depths of your inner love about a certain concept, character, body type, topic, etc, that people will see it and connect with it whether you mean for it to be convincing or not hahaha. Sometimes just really loving something inspires others to love it and see it your way too.'

Saix undoubtedly has a pretty curvy silhouette, yes lmao there is no way I wouldn't realise that hahaha - Its harder to see it in his KH3/Unreal Engine model due to the stylistic overhaul but his original (and superior imo) model has notably wide shoulders and hips compared to a small waist, yeah. All of the original Org members had really distinct shapes so you can tell who is who, even with the hoods up. I do tend to draw Saix with fairly muscular thighs and broader shoulders, but in general my artstyle is what I would say is 'not very anime proportioned' in that I try to have a decent amount of realism in my anatomy/shape rather than super lean or angular bodies. I don't ever want my blorbos to appear emaciated or for them to have the 'ideal standard' body, if you know what I mean, I really enjoy drawing my faves to look like real people that have folds and bulk and 'imperfections'. I do typically try to draw Saix as fairly broad, with a balance between topheavy upper arms and chest and a more rounded hip area compared to his waist. (some examples below, including a super super old sketch I did to visualise lfotr isa and terra's size difference). I do try and make all of my usual blorbos have identifiable yet still human proportions; I tend to draw Xemnas slightly softer and chubbier around his middle but he is still broad and powerful. Saix is curvy but still noticeably strong and while not entirely lean he has a sleekness to him. I draw Hendrik with a lot of padding, hair and with much more unique facial features. Sylvando is probably the only character I draw that has a body close to the canon source - he is lean and muscular and tbh the only character I really draw with pronounced ab muscles, the same way that in canon he is shown to be very cut - but in all fairness he's a gymnast/acrobat/performer/contortionist/dancing clown so drawing him as noticeably and suprisingly ripped tracks imo. Plus I sprinkle on so many of my own headcanoned features regarding his hair, skin tone, freckles, etc that it doesn't feel too weird to me haha. so tl;dr yes I do draw Saix with somewhat of a curvy shape (when I do fullbody draws of him, its been a little while) however I think my version is pretty masculine and doesn't read as disproportionate or exaggerated.

Anatomy and stylization are things I always want to push myself on and develop more - my biggest fear is having 'same face syndrome' or for my work to feel like my love for the characters don't come through haha - though by the sounds of it, the way I portray my blorbos is definitely doing something for you, so I must be going in the right direction haha

oh I yap about all kinds of bullshit on twitter lmao I use it as a place to talk about my blorbo thoughts often :p for those who don't follow me on twitter, you can find me here, although I'll warn you that I do most some n/s/f/w stuff there that I do not post here. Let me know if you find out which post I made that vibed with you, I'd love to hear which thing I said resonated with you and why haha! I am somewhat more active on twitter than on here/I tend to share more of others work and do general updates on twitter just because its easier, but I think interacting long form with others is a lot easier on tumblr for sure. Long asks and chats like this area always nice!

[your-fave-queers-queerness]

have you ever looked at a character and thought to yourself, "damn, they definitely are queer in a way that makes most peoples heads spin"? then youre in the right place.

mspec gays and lesbians. straight homos. oriented aroaces. boygirls. turigirls. lesboys. and every other seemingly contradictory label under the sun. weve got it all, baby. so send in those headcanons!!!

as a heads up: reclaimed LGBT+ slurs will be present on this blog. i choose not to censor or trigger tag for them because for myself and many others, they are important identity labels, and these words are important pieces of queer history.

GUIDELINES:

send an ask stating the character, the media theyre from, and whatever labels you headcanon them using - feel free to include pronoun headcanons! in turn, ill edit them onto the corresponding flags and post that shit for the world to see <3

for labels that have multiple flags, please specify if you want a specific flag used, otherwise ill just pick my favorite option. i may make a flag list at some point in the future to make things easier, but for now you can include the flag in your ask or describe it to me. i'll also have a "#flag directory" tag for any flags i reblog.

if a character appears in multiple media, please specify any preference for that as well, including if theres specific art you want used, otherwise ill pick my favorite for that as well.

for characters without official art (such as from podcasts and novels), i will default to using the cover art or equivalent for the media. however, i welcome you to send in your own fan art instead if youd like!

posts will include edits for each flag on its own, plus one with all the flags combined.

i reserve the right to turn down any request if the character or media makes me uncomfortable for any reason. additionally, i will not make edits of real people, or of characters who are personas of real people.

any arguments against the "validity" of these identities will not be engaged with. good faith questions will be allowed, and tagged as "#info" alongside any other education-focused posts, but this blog is primarily for character headcanons.

edits are fine to use as icons and such! id prefer credit but its not really necessary.

and psst, fictives and fictionkin and everyone else of the sort - youre all welcome here. on that note, this blog is syscourse free. good vibes and friendship only 👍

blog icon is a combo of the lesboy and turigirl flags

[new about-the-mod post coming soon maybe? old one was out of date whoopsie]

[bluesdevil-rp-blues]

Welcome to the Crossroads

The Blues Devil. Keeper of the crossroads. Harbinger of souls. Proud owner of a $5 Hot Topic gift card.

In an age where musicians are able to sell their souls to the record industry, having to journey to the crossroads feels antiquated. But the blues will never die--and neither will its devil.

--

This is an rp blog for the Blues Devil from Metalocalypse. This blog's mun (Fishklok) has not rped on tumblr since 2017, so please forgive him if he's rusty. Also, for some reason he set this blog up before law school finals, so expect activity to be sporadic. Although, feel free to send inquiries about contracts because he needs the practice.

--

Rules

Don't be an asshole

If you don't like the character, please don't interact with me/them. I don't think this is going to be an issue with this blog, but I've rped on here long enough to feel the need to clarify this.

I don't know how I feel about shipping at the moment. We'll see.

Mun is 21+, but please be tactful when sending NSFW content.

--

Headcanons for this blog (official bio page on blog will be set up later)

Name: [The] Blues Devil

Other titles: The devil (not the Devil-devil, but efficiency of language), [the] Blues (less favored; tends to be confusing)

Age: It's complicated, but he's a libra

Gender: Doesn't have one. His body is closer to an auditory manifestation than a physical one. His gender is the sound of someone's fingers scraping against the strings of their guitar as they let one final note ring out in their empty home.

Pronouns: He/they. Uses it/its when being referred to as a concept rather than referred to directly

Orientation: Does not care about human affairs enough to identify with them. But probably aroace.

Powers: Capturing souls, summoning dust storms (usually for ambience), drafting contracts

Appearance: Tall, slender pale humanoid with long black hair usually wearing a maroon suit and fedora with red accents. Has one red eye (his right) and one white eye (his left). Appears to have a soul patch, but that's actually another eye that's usually dormant. Has the ability to turn his face into a skull. Well, I guess everyone has that ability in the long run. But he can do it on command. Pointed teeth that are slightly yellowed. Don't judge. You try finding a dental plan when your income comes from capturing the souls of aspiring musicians.

Tags:

📝: interactions/ in character posts

😈: headcanons/lore

🎵: music

🐟: ooc posts

🎨: art

🖼:aesthetic

[oneclickangel]

journey: orientation and how i wasn't there for most of it.

(title is a reference, iykyk)

my birthday is in 6 days and i feel like i should do at least something so this is something! blogs talking about myself and my experiences, counting down to the day of the event itself

and the first one i thought of is my experience with romantic and sexual orientations. why? well the ace tag trending gave me some ideas lol

for most of my childhood, i wasn't interested in anything that isn't studying and playing by myself. wish i can say the same now

and thankfully, my parents weren't the type to fess over me interacting with the opposite sex not that i did that that much but still and teaching me about marriage and romance and all that wasn't on their minds yet at that time - and oh, how i yearn for them to stay that way now but alas.

i didn't get the hype with getting crushes and dating, until i developed what i thought was a crush. i remember being happy that i finally fit in and just like the other girls - that i wasn't just a weirdo with weird interests and lack of interest in people. and looking back on it, it's not like it wasn't a crush. it just wasn't a romantic one.

this continued on until i was 14. i'd get crushes where i just enjoyed looking at the boys' faces. it never occured to me that traditional crushes were supposed to involve actual romance. and when i did try imagining myself in romantic scenes with the boys i liked, i either felt disgusted or neutral. the neutral side of things mostly applied to fictional boys anyway.

then came the year of 2018. funnily enough, i actually remember being on tumblr that time - for the whole purpose of reading imagines of a fictional guy i thought i liked in those ways. i'd read, read, read, unaware that these pieces of writing... don't actually make me feel anything. that imagining myself in romantic + sexual situations with this guy was only bc everyone else was doing it.

when suddenly pride month rolled around.

i was an ally from the beginning. and bc of that i wanted to know more about the community so that i could show my support better. little did 14 year old me know.

i stumbled upon the term "aromantic". i started reading out of curiosity. i thought of how i could relate to most of the traits of an aromantic. i realized.

i remember i was like "so you're telling me i don't actually have to feel this stuff for people i'm seemingly attracted to?!" and remember that guy from before? every romantic and sexual thought of him vanished in an instant - and i've never felt so free. i even remember me writing a platonic self-shipping fic of me and him to celebrate; and luckily, i had friends who celebrated alongside me.

though at that time, i thought aromantic also meant asexual, so there i was going around telling people i'm aromantic without the asexual - most likely because i was taught that sex was just an extension of romance rather than being its own separate thing. until of course, i discovered the term later on and went "omg so me".

the label kind of enabled me to be more open about my dislike of romance and sex - borderline condemning it. but that was merely me projecting my own experiences; having to be subjected to society's expectations of me was more than just irritating and tiring. even if i ever change my mind one day, why should that matter? sure, preparing for the future is a smart move but what's the point if i'm abandoning my present self?

years pass and by 2022, i still identified as an aromantic asexual. at some point i even identified as a gay aroace, but then reverted back to aroace. even when there were situations and experiences that challenged me identifying with those labels, i persisted. even when i first interacted with whom i call my "first love", i wasn't attracted to them off the bat.

it took quite a few interactions. i myself was confused as to why talking to them made me so happy, especially because we didn't even talk in a chatroom - i was just an anon on their writing blog, the reason why i frequented their blog being one of the hurdles that almost made me change my labels.

to this day, i'm still unsure if mustering up the courage to privately message them made me realize i'm actually attracted to them or that i gradually realized after chatting with them in private. but in the end, i realized. i'm attracted to them. i liked the idea of being in a non-platonic relationship with them, i like imagining us in romantic situations (although at that time i didn't yet know what they look like) but either was too shy or i genuinely did not develop sexual feelings for them yet at that time. i confessed the night i messaged them.

to my surprise, it was their birthday. i'm unsure if a confession is a fit birthday gift still.

but when this happened, i didn't feel like i was betraying my aromantic asexual labels. it's more like... i broke free of them. broke free of these stupid labels that tried to tie me down for so long. so what if i haven't been attracted to anyone until now? am i not allowed to freely love because of these two words? or even, am i not allowed to be free of these words even if they define me? so i simply let go.

funnily enough, the person i fell in love with is aroace themself. a silly little plot twist in my story, i would say.

we begin to talk. a night turns into a week. a week turns into a month. 2 months after initially talking, we got together. i remember i couldn't stop smiling over how lucky i got. the person i love, who doesn't even reciprocate my feelings, was willing to give me a chance. i talked about them whenever i had the chance; the word "boyfriend" felt so sweet on my tongue.

4 months and 18 days - that's how long we were together. i remember the breakup like it was yesterday. because i once thought i wouldn't ever go through one, let alone cry myself to sleep a few nights because of it. but that wouldn't be the first time i've done that because of them - but even despite all the anguish i've experienced throughout this period, i was (and still am?) in love with them.

simply because of the fact that i was in love with them.

i acknowledged how strong and powerful romantic and sexual attraction can be, now that i experience it. though i still think people exaggerate the overall experience, their words now hold some truth for me. and to tell you the truth,

i am scared of feeling this way for someone else.

i just can't imagine myself experiencing such highs for a real person that isn't them. it feels like an absolute betrayal - to my past self, to them, to my current self. it just seems impossible. plus, feeling like a late bloomer makes me feel like shit. but if there's one thing this experience taught me,

it's that anything really can happen.

this journey is still ongoing - i'm unlabeled, still kinda in love with my ex (who is also my friend haha) and the future is uncertain. maybe i'll go back to being labeled, maybe i'll get over them, maybe both, maybe neither.

but for now, i'm unlabeled. because i'm not something to be defined.

i'm someone to be experienced.

if you read all that then thank you for listening to me ramble lol idk i just feel like talking about myself. it still feels like people don't really know me idk idk i was kinda being cheesy and stuff but hey when else am i supposed to be amirite

i will try to come up with topics for the upcoming days hehehe

[writer-ace]

I watched the asexual and aromantic communities get eaten away at by exclusionists and proto-TERFs and queer people making fun of microlabels and people who talked about how they just wanted all of us to stop dividing ourselves so much and people who decided that the concept of the Split Attraction Model was homophobic and people who flooded the ace and aro tags with porn and--

Well, you get the point.

But now a lot of people on this site don't know about ace culture and modern history, so here's some stuff you should know about:

The Asexuality Visibility and Education Network (AVEN) was started in 2001 by asexuality activist David Jay as a forum and educational space about asexuality.

A Carnival of Aces, which is a monthly blogging carnival on ace topics, has been taking place since May 2011 and has included such topics as coming out, non-traditional relationships styles and polyamory, asexual education (which I hosted), and labels and microlabels.

The Split Attraction Model is one model for talking about sexual and romantic orientation that splits out those two orientations, allowing individuals to describe sexual attraction/orientation as distinct from romantic orientation (e.g., aromantic bisexual, heteroromantic grey-asexual). While this model is primarily used by people on the ace and aro spectrums, it can be used by anyone who wants to discuss or describe sexual orientation as being separate from romantic orientation.

The AVEN triangle (or asexuality triangle) is a black and white or greyscale triangle that originated from taking the Kinsey scale and extending it down into another axis to address/acknowledge the range of attraction between what's on the Kinsey scale (allosexuality) and no sexual attraction (asexuality). It's generally presented as white at the horizontal line at the top and then black at the point at the bottom, often with a gradation of shades of grey down to the bottom.

Microlabels are specific (sometimes very narrow) labels for sexualities, romantic orientations, and genders. While these are not aro- or ace-specific, they were often associated with those communities because there was a culture of having nuanced conversations about narrow definitions, often by people couldn't find something that fit their experience in the standard L, G, B, or T lexicon. Demiromantic/demisexual, cupioromantic/cupiosexual, and quoiromantic/quoisexual are all examples of micro-labels.

The ace ring, a black ring worn on the middle finger of the right hand (generally) is a symbol of asexuality that some ace people wear. It originated on AVEN in 2005 when people were looking for a symbol that was rather covert.

Cake has also been an ace symbol, mostly from the idea that ace people agree that cake is better than sex. It used to be common to see a drawing of a cake with the ace flag colors.

The ace of (heart/spades/clubs/diamonds) has at times been used as a symbol for different ace spectrum/aro spectrum combinations. Ace of hearts is generally agreed on as alloromantic asexual and ace of spades as aromantic asexual (aroace or aro/ace). Ace of clubs is sometimes for grey-romantic asexual and ace of diamonds sometimes for demiromantic asexual, but those are less common.

Dragons were also associated with the ace community, at least on Tumblr. I'm less certain where this one came from (theories include that they're mythological creatures the way ace people are seen to be or that it's because there were headcanons that Charlie Weasley was ace).

[microknifeyuri]

;; ( strawpage || check out my scenecore mic art! | check out my object hosts designs! / any pronouns, aroace bi-oriented cupioromantic, panadoxgender. ) ;; self ship blog: @echoiclove || mic "daily" blog: @microphone-ii (inactive as of now) || join my super awesome discord server boy || more info under "read more"

!!! ANY II CONTENT I MAKE IS CANON DIVERGENT (UNLESS STATED OTHERWISE) AND I WILL ONLY MAKE CONTENT OF IT UNDER THE BRAINWASH AU IDEA. S2C NEVER HAPPENED. !!!

I would prefer it if people who labelled themselves as proships or antis didn't interact with me. The definition of whatever shipping discourse is going on stopped making sense long enough. HOWEVER. I don't want people who do enjoy problematic content to interact with my stuff either. Nor are they allowed to make content of it. Much LESS to make messed up shit with it.

character analysis masterpost

( Tags that I use and their meaning. )

#maxposteo :: your daily dose of Max's facts or thoughts.

#postmaxxing :: shitpost/nonserious posts/it's not that deep posts.

#max does art :: full rendered/colored art, fics, edits, or others.

#max's raw art :: wips/unfinished artwork.

#max explains the ii gkgg au :: if you're interesed about the ii gkgg au, you can find some extra lore/fun shenanigans on the asks I answer! You can drop an ask there too!

#ii fandom neg: this tag is not exclusive (meaning that you can use it as well), but i basically rant about the ii fandom's stupidity and lack of media literacy.

byi:

- i dislike any taco ships (especially taco/mic) so don't expect to see any of that here

- i ship microknife, if you are uncomfortable by that, then i would advice for you to not follow me? but you can do whatever you want, just a heads-up because each month i go kind of rabid and drop 10 posts about them.

- i fw nickcase. idc what you have to say atp but i do like them. idgaf if you don't and want to interact but like. don't be mean or whatever

- I feel like I should say this but like. I don't like Shadowvanilla. I do however find the possessive themes on SMilk's behaviour regarding Pure Vanilla to be There and also people just make really good art about it. I hope Shadow Milk gets hit by a bus.

- i HATE exclusionists if your ass is saying that gaygirls or bi lesbians shouldn't exist GET OUT !!!!

- i block freely

Masterpost list! (Designs/Gijinkas and such!)

Can I use these designs?

- You can! But if you do, please do not change the headcanons that are on them! And don't use them to draw T4c0mic, Kn1fan or you know, anything shitty.

Can I get inspired off your designs?

- YES YOU CAN!!!

Can I draw them?

- Yes!

Note: Some designs need a rework and others are outdated. I'll be adding the edits on the list as well. A new masterpost will be made once I am happy with the designs.

( Inanimate Insanity. )

1. Mephone4, Co-hosts, Support Characters + Meeple HQ (Inanimate Insanity) [OUTDATED]

2. MADE A SHOW AND IT'S NAME IS INANIMATE INSANITY... it's very catchy!!! (Gijinkas of the FULL II cast) [OUTDATED]

3. My objectsona's ref! <- (Heart Locket) || My objectsona's ref! <- (Roots) || My ponysona's ref! <- (Stellar Astromane) || My Micsona's ref! || (more will be added)

4. Bot, Lifering, Soap, Box & Dough gijinka edits! (OUTDATED)

5. Post S2 Microphone design! (Outdated! Check point 20!)

6. S2/ Post S2 Trophy redesign!

7. Lightbulb Gijinka Redesign! (OUTDATED)

8. OJ and Knife redesigns/updated ref. (EXTREMELY OUTDATED)

9. The Floor (redesign) and Walkie Talkie Gijinka design!

10. Test Tube gijinka redesign!

11. Post II Knife gijinka design! (OUTDATED)

12. Clover gijinka redesign!

13. Silver Spoon gijinka redesign!

14. Fan gijinka redesign!

15. Bomb gijinka redesign!

16. Apple gijinka redesign!

17. Mephone4 post ii gijinka design! (OUTDATED) (HE WILL GET A REDESIGN SOON)

18. Baseball, Suitcase, Salt, Pepper, Balloon, Paintbrush and Pickle gijinka redesigns!

19. Yinyang gijinka redesign!

20. Microphone Gijinka Post S2 design!

21. Cabby, Candle, Goo and Toilet gijinka designs!

22. Soap gijinka redesign.

(Other Object Shows)

1. IPad Gijinka (Object Invasion) (OUTDATED)

2. Kit & Pilly & Limey (BURNER), Moonlight & Nori & Skull (TDOS), Bubble & Snowball (BFDI/BFB/TPOT) [yes. all in one.]

(Other stuff)

1. II GKGG AU swap list

- more will be added once posted.

[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

since i’ve been seeing a lot of posts on my dash of people shipping kate bishop with yelena belova, i feel the need to make a friendly reminder that yelena is canonically aroace.

[photo id: a screecap from lgbtqia-characters.fandom.com that says “yelena belova is an aroace character from marvel.” /end id]

[photo id: a screencap from the wikipedia page for yelena belova, with a highlighted portion reading, “she is the first confirmed asexual character in the marvel universe.” /end id]

creator/author devin grayson said in an interview that yelena is “more likely to identify as asexual than to follow Nat’s romantic path.”

in this panel from a comic, another character asks yelena if she is a lesbian, to which she emphatically replies, “no, i’m not a lesbian. i’m not... anything.”

now, if you’re not aware, it is incredibly rare for aromantic asexuals to have any canonical representation in popular culture. there are aroaces in webcomics and podcasts, sure, but in the kind of media that your straight friend can actually name? almost unheard of. and for that aroace character to be a person instead of a robot or alien? doubly almost unheard of.

the point i am getting to here is that i need you guys to be fucking respectful in your fanworks. i need you to not erase yelena’s orientation and make her allo just because you want to make two hot ladies kiss.

i’m not saying that you can’t ship them, and i’m not trying to rain on your parade. there’s nothing wrong with wanting two hot ladies to kiss. but i personally find it deeply offensive when people change an aro/ace character’s orientation because it’s “boring” and it gets in the way of your desire to make them bone and/or fall in love. seeing that really fucking sucks for us.

of course i can’t speak for all aroaces, but as an aroace it makes me feel pretty shitty to see post after post calling yelena a lesbian, and even shittier to know that a lot of people will continue doing that even if they see this post or other posts from other aroaces talking about this. it feels like the queer community doesn’t really care about us much, because fantasizing about two attractive women kissing is more important than some actual aroace representation, or caring about how we feel. 

if you want to write kate/yelena fanfic while being respectful of yelena’s orientation, check out this writing asexuality in fiction post.(the links in that post are unfortunately broken. try the articles on this site.) if you want to do some more research on aspec identities themselves, consider my asexuality resources tag and aromanticism tag.

bottom line: please be respectful and please prioritize aspec people over your headcanons. that isn’t too much to ask.

[syncopein3d]

1. I was looking for fainting content and there was a lot of overlap. Somnophilia has a lot of noncon stuff in it, always directed at women by men, that I don't like. This is often absent from more whump oriented scenarios.

2. Hurt/comfort. I love it when someone is progressively worse off, collapses, and someone else takes care of them!

3. Torture (the favorite of the original asker, but what do you do?), death, I block both tags.

4. I would love to see more stories with named OCs like the Ghost Ambulance series! I noticed that for most of mine the more specific I was, the less attention they got, so I get why most people don't do this.

5. Whumper turned whumpee, I guess. I don't like whumpers much in general unless they're getting a beatdown during a rescue.

6. When I'm writing I can't listen to anything. I need quiet to concentrate.

7. Physical whump for me, always.

8. I prefer whump without a whumper, actually. Gimme that good rescue and nurture and care stuff.

9. Sure, it's not top of my list but I do enjoy it!

10. I have insomnia and persistent depressive disorder and am frequently tired and achy. Characters going to sleep or having someone take care of them is cathartic and satisfying for me.

11. I pick out the bits I like from a lot! I hate to mention anyone and leave people out but I think I've already mentioned whump-captain for Ghost Ambulance. Whump-kia has thrown a lot of great stuff at us, too.

12. Ideally, none.

13. I love a stoic whumpee hiding the pain until they physically can't any more.

14. Lots of kinds of caretakers, but especially the kind that are calm, in control, maybe initially reluctant but never mean.

15. All my OCs are whump-related at some point. XD Not many get posted. I have a pretty long revenge-oriented novel wip about a whumpee gradually becoming an evil witch queen.

16. I was originally on Tumblr for msub bdsm content. It was kind of a phase that ended, so I wandered off to explore more sfw interests. I rediscovered Tumblr post-nsfw ban through, of all things, the Curated Tumblr subreddit, which also introduced me to Murderbot (I LOVE Murderbot).

17. We have almost no interests in common so I wouldn't know what to ask! Thanks for doing this meme/question post, though!

18. I like them both, maybe written slightly more than visual because of how much more immersive it can make perspectives to me.

19. I don't care for it

20. My favorite

21. Either way! I'm aroace irl. In fiction sex and romance are things I can enjoy as tropes, but I don't need them. Romantic is cool, someone just helping a friend or enemy out of compassion or platonic affection is cool, too. I enjoy the enemies to lovers version, too.

22. I think the words whumper and whumpee suck and would rather see (amd write) stories with names in them.

WHUMPER-DUMPS ASK GAME

What got you into whump?

What is your favourite type of whump?

Least favourite type of whump?

What do you wish you saw more in this community?

Whumper turned Whumpee or Whumpee turned Whumper?

Do you listen to anything while writing/drawing whump? If it’s music, what genre do you typically listen to?

Emotional or physical whump?

Opinion on whump without a whumper? Ex: Whumpee falling into an ice-cold river and getting hypothermia.

Opinion on illness whump?

Have you ever experienced anything you put your whumpees through?

Favourite whump blogs?

Favourite type of whumper?

Favourite type of whumpee?

Favourite type of caretaker?

How many whump related ocs do you have? How many have you posted?

What made you create this blog? Do you have any regrets/things you wish you did differently?

Freebie! Ask me anything.

Do you prefer visual whump or written whump? Any reason why?

Opinion on all hurt no comfort?

Opinion on little hurt all comfort?

Platonic or romantic whump?

Most controversial whump opinion?

[upside-down-uni]

THE STUDYBLR WITH KNIVES SERVER PRESENTS:

the Pride Reading Challenge🌈

you'll hear it everywhere in the next month and you'll hear it here too: Pride Month is every month and you're not less entitled to happiness outside of these random 30 days! So, we're kicking off our queer reading challenge with a bang in June and will be serving you hot and steaming queer recs for the next couple of months! we hope you enjoy it as much as our previous challenges; worry not, there will also be a Summer Reading Challenge 2.0, since so many people enjoyed it last year :)

RULES:

◆ please reblog this post if you’re participating

◆ for each of the prompts, read a book of your choice and cross the prompt out on the above template

◆ post your updates in the form of text posts, bookish photos, or anything else you come up with under the tag #studyblr w/knives reading challenge!

◆ the challenge will last from the 1st of june till the 31st of december, but feel free to finish it at your own pace

! be sure to hide any spoilers under the cut when posting updates/reviews, so people can avoid them if needed :)

if you want to make this a Pride Month only challenge or if you’re just starting to dip your toes into lgbtq+ literature, we have a template with fewer prompts for you as well (see below the cut). the storygraph challenge has the corresponding number of bonus prompts, so you can tailor it to your own preference

if you have any questions, feel free to send them to me or @bulletnotestudies

stay tuned for our recommendations for each prompt!​

[transcript of the prompts and what each of them means under the cut]

This challenge consists of 16 rad prompts:

queer found family you might not like this but this is what the ideal atomic family looks *like points at 5 very close friends who mean the world to each other*

queer academia the nonfiction prompt; queer history/politics/etc. - this includes essays and articles!

fucked up queers horror, crime, thriller books featuring queer characters

abolish annihilate aspec characters on the aroace spectrum

coming out book a book where coming out is a (relatively) major plot point

Public Universal Friend and Sappho Are Dancing On Your Grave or, alternatively, queer characters in a historical setting

epic queers because being queer is better with dragons and life altering journeys through space (a larger than life story featuring queer epic heroes)

in sappho's footsteps queer poetry

yes homo a queer romance book

queer joy everyone is queer and nothing hurts - what's on the tin, no hurt only queer joy, angst? we don’t know her

sword wlw a book featuring any kinda badass wlw characters

old queers as in old(er) queer characters or old(er) books (published before 2000) with queer characters

yes, i'm queer, mind your business characters are queer but it's not a major plot point

down with cis aka books that transed your gender a book with trans character(s)

ownvoices books by queer authors - fiction, memoirs, etc.

not gay as in happy but queer as in fuck you books featuring characters with lesser known orientations/gender identities

ALTERNATIVE TEMPLATE IF YOU WANT TO MAKE THIS A MINI READING CHALLENGE:

TAGLIST:

@kkul-bee @melaschnie @fluencylevelfrench @myhoneststudyblr @serendistudy @condenasttraveler @welcome-fuckers @thebudbblylinguist @caroloveslife @booksnscience @three-blogs-in-a-trenchcoat @soleciito @companion-of-the-earth @pencilspeaker @pothimi @autumnalglaze @starguiders @ngisi @hold-fire @yourneighborhoodbibliophile @thankstosoullesslovers @anurennero @dreamsdemandhustles-blog @selkiestudies @the---hermit @emdashaddict @thiqqachu @happylightdragonalmond @tranquilstudy @aaalias @perpetualanon @gloriousinternetpaper @dostoevskyforthewin @idkbruhhhhwtf @pandetrigo @simons-studyblr

[aro-culture-is]

If I were idemromantic and sex positive asexual, would I still be aroace?

I have a very strange relationship with romantic feelings and sexual attraction, and there is only one person (my current & only partner I've ever had) that I have ever considered having sex with

But the fact that I do experience what I consider to be romantic attraction to them specifically makes me wonder whether that means I wouldn't be considered aroace because my relationship to everyone who isn't in my head (including my partner) functions exactly like a romonormative (I don't know if this is the actual term, but I assume that gets the point across (romance-normative)) monogamous relationship would

I do identify with borearomantic and aplatonic as well but I don't know if, because all of these things are combined in such a romonormative way to the point that I no longer function like an aroace person in my life at all, if I would still be considered aroace?

gonna break this ask down for the sake of my processing:

If I were idemromantic and sex positive asexual, would I still be aroace?

To start with - being arospec (idemromantic being under the aro spectrum) and asexual (sex-favorable or otherwise) can mean that you use the term aroace if that's what you prefer! Otherwise, it might be useful to know of the term acemid, meaning asexual and aro-spec. Use whatever labels feel right or bring you community.

I have a very strange relationship with romantic feelings and sexual attraction, and there is only one person (my current & only partner I've ever had) that I have ever considered having sex with

sounds like an aro-spec and ace-spec life to me :)

But the fact that I do experience what I consider to be romantic attraction to them specifically makes me wonder whether that means I wouldn't be considered aroace because my relationship to everyone who isn't in my head (including my partner) functions exactly like a romonormative (I don't know if this is the actual term, but I assume that gets the point across (romance-normative)) monogamous relationship would

so, i'm not 100% sure I understand this, so I'm going to lay out what i think you are asking and respond to that: I'm concerned that because i experience romantic attraction to an individual, and this relationship is pretty standard for a romantic relationship, I am not aromantic enough. (probably searching for the word amatonormative?)

if that's more or less a correct interpretation: that's no problem! i honestly can't think of a single point in the last... decade or so i've been in/on aro tumblr... where we've defined aromanticism as excluding individuals who almost never experience attraction to others, even if those few instances last a long time. I can't say the view hasn't come up, but it's been thoroughly unpopular and disliked for good reasons. Notably, orientations can change, labels are meant to help individuals find community and kinship - not to separate us, and frankly, it's no one else's business to define your identity as "enough".

I do identify with borearomantic and aplatonic as well but I don't know if, because all of these things are combined in such a romonormative way to the point that I no longer function like an aroace person in my life at all, if I would still be considered aroace?

I hope my thoughts are clear at this point, but: if that label feels good at all for you, yes! The only "bad" or "misused" label is one that you don't feel describes you or connects you to others. Ie, I don't feel described by the terms cis, binary trans, or nonbinary - none of those feel good to me or connect me to others in ways I want. Genderqueer, on the other hand, feels good. It feels like a sigh of relief, a knowledge that I don't have to be in a new binary of, well, binary or nonbinary, and my identity is queer fundamentally, so I like the term.

I hope this helps! I'm filing this under the tag "am i aro", as you are not at all the only person with a question like this!

[max--phillips]

You: I can write anything I want, and here’s the stuff I wanna write!

This person: um… actually, no, you can’t.

Hey, @ayerschaos, buddy. Art does have an effect on the people who see it, but the artist who creates it does not have the responsibility to cater to every single person who could see it.

I skimmed your blog real quick, and I realize you’re aroace. Me too actually! Well, more grayace/grayaro, but nonetheless. I just happen to not be sex- or romance-repulsed, and prefer lesbian as a label because gender and sexuality and romantic orientations are all very confusing and overlap a lot and it’s a hot mess. You know how it can be.

It’s clear that you want more media, fan made or otherwise, that caters to aro and ace folks. Understandable—certain fandoms have the smut market more on the saturated side. But, not everyone wants to create things that lack sex and romance. So perhaps you should take it upon yourself to create the stories you wish to see in the world.

Also, you’re suggesting that people creating art that may reflect their personal life experience and things they like is somehow harmful to you and others. If something is tagged appropriately so the content is evident to potential onlookers, it cannot be. You being unhappy with the amount of media with sex and romance is not abuse. You’re just frustrated. Which is a valid feeling! Lack of representation sucks. But including something some people experience that you do not is not an inherent attempt to harm you. Straight relationships in media and art are not an inherent attempt to harm lesbian and gay folks. Cis people in media and art are not an inherent attempt to harm trans people. Both of these statements can be made the other way around.

Other stories are worth writing, but perhaps they’re best written by other folks. Like maybe yourself! Or maybe some other aroace authors and artists out there I’m sure you’re yet to encounter.

All that’s to say… consider letting people do their thing instead of making someone’s post made to encourage people to write what they want into a weird accusation that completely derails the point.

Also, just a shot in the dark here… going through posts tagged as or containing something that you find triggering or upsetting is a form of self-harm. Maybe take a step back and think about if what you’re doing is the best thing for your own mental wellbeing.

you know what? i actually fucking love being a writer. truly. i adore it. doesn’t matter if my stuff is good enough for others. i literally have the ability to create ANY fucking story i want to read.

if i can’t find a story with a specific kink or dynamics? i can write it myself.

if i want my characters to look or sound a certain way and no one else likes/writes it? i can write it myself.

and the coolest thing is that no matter what i write, i will still find at least one person who has been looking for exact same thing and we will enjoy it together.

writing is so fucking badass.

[acespec-ed]

The survey results!

I finished compiling all the results to that survey I made and here’s the link to the spreadsheet that has all the responses, sorted into categories, with charts at the bottom. (A few of the charts have words like “sex” and “masturbation” in size 20 font so you might wanna wait on clicking that until you’re in an environment where it wouldn’t be awkward.)

Now, to address a couple things before I get started.

I would first off, like to thank the person who pointed out the fact that I was technically asking minors sexually-explicit questions. By the time I saw their concern, I was up to 60+ answers and it was too late to start it over, so I had to quickly jump in and edit in a note telling minors not to answer certain questions. (I swear, that was an accident! I was debating on whether to include them and then decided on including them, then immediately forgot I made them a demographic as I went on to making the other questions.)

I am also sorry that I didn’t include options under certain demographic questions. I wanted to keep things simple. And to be honest? If I were to redo this, I’d put in a “write in” for gender, a “write in” for orientation. And then, have a required question asking if you were on the ace spectrum, not on the ace spectrum, or questioning. And a similar one for aro. Because that would have made my life 10x easier and you would’ve gotten these results half a week ago oh my god.

Additionally, I don’t want to see any nitpicking on what responses I put where. I’ve had to redo/recount categories several times because I realized I had somehow missed a huge chunk of people who fall under that category. And there’s been responses that I sat on forever trying to figure out where to sort them and in the end, just... gave up. This project has taken up a majority of my free time for the past week and I just want to move on with my life.

Now onto the results, under the “read more.”

There were a total of 745 respondents! (though like six of them showed up blank?) I put their results into categories that you can see on the spreadsheet. Aces, not aces, aros, not aros, alloallos, aroaces, alloaces, aroallos, strictly asexual, strictly aromantic, strictly aroace, gray area aces, gray area aros, demisexuals, demiromantics, graysexuals, grayromantics, aegosexuals, aegoromantics, and questioning. 

I do not have the mental energy to go through every questions with every group, so go check out the spreadsheet itself. I’m just going to go over what I found interesting, and explain why I asked some of what I did.

For specific aspec labels, I only made categories for demis, grays, and aegos. Because they were, unsurprisingly, the most common identities (aside from asexual and aromantic). You can see the numbers below.

I’m surprised at the amount of aroflux people though. And aceflux too. The Tumblr tags for them are mostly inactive which made me think they were more on the rare side.

People assume aces are sex repulsed or averse. And they make up the majority of aces. But 9.8% of aces are sex-favorable towards doing the deed, and 15.7% of them are sex-favorable towards sexual content. People assume allosexuals are usually into sex. But 1.8% of allos are sex-repulsed by doing the deed, and .9% of nonaces are sex-repulsed towards sexual content. What about aros? 22.9% of aros are romance-favorable in terms of themselves, and 2% of nonaros were romance-averse. 29.7% of aros were romance-favorable in regards to romantic content, which turns out is the majority opinion among aros!  While .7% of nonaros were romance-repulsed towards romantic content.

I asked questions about the environments people grew up in. To see if I could debunk any myths about aces being from sex-negative households. It turns out, there were more aces who grew up in a sex positive household (26.7%) than a sex negative (20.7%) one. It was most common for them to be mixed though (33.2%). Interestingly enough, in the not-ace category, 23.7% grew up in a sex negative household while 22.8% grew up sex positive. It’s a close enough difference to chalk up to coincidence though. 41.6% were mixed. It turns out more demisexuals grew up in a sex negative household. 26.5% vs 25.5%. That’s only one percentage off, which meant the tie break came down to one or two people. Overall, since the majority of everyone answered “mixed,” and the sex negative/positive responses were so closely tied, I think it’s safe to say that in most cases, the views one grew up hearing doesn’t mean much in terms of if someone is ace or not. But it is interesting to note that those who are “strictly” ace, have 28.7% in sex positive households and 17.2% in sex negative. So that’s something.

Aros, it seems, grew up with a lot of pressure to be in a romantic relationship. 33% had that pressure, whereas only 19.4% grew up where being single was seen as an okay thing. 37.8% had a mixture of both. Those who aren’t aro, 24.8%  had that pressure and 24.8% grew up in a “being single is okay” environment. No, I did not make a typo. The numbers really are identical. 37.8% were mixed. As for alloallos- 31.9% grew up where being single was okay, vs 21.2% being pressured. Aroaces- 32.3% were pressured, 18.7% were not. Alloaces- 26.1% pressured, 21.1% okay. Aroallos- 39.4% pressured, 19.7% okay. Very interesting stats here. Looks like aspecs, arospecs in particular, are more likely to grow up feeling pressure to be in a relationship. (Then again, kinda makes sense.)

Time to bring up masturbation. The majority of nonaces do it several times a week at 38.4%. The majority of aces also do it several times a week! (But our percentage is 25.5%.) Aces and nonaces don’t have any particular preference when it comes to what they do it to. Most of both categories had that as the majority. However, reading materials come in second for aces whereas nonaces prefer visuals. I was mostly curious about aegosexuals though. 45.7% of them go at it several times a week. 35.8% vary in what they use, but 28.4% go to reading materials, 17.9% use their imagination, and 11.9% go for visuals.

As for libido? The majority of both aces and nonaces are on the weaker side. Not a single person, out of 745, answered any higher than “slightly strong.” More aces have it weak than nonaces, but the fact still remains just as many nonaces have it weak too. Only 10.8% of nonaces answered “slightly strong,” though only 5.1% of aces have it “slightly strong.” 40% of those who are strictly ace have it weak, 38.3% very weak. So aces are unsurprisingly more likely to have a lower libido. But, 2.9% of them have it slightly strong.

Do my alloaces want some depressing news? 20.7% of alloallos see sex as “very important” in a romantic relationship. 20.7% of alloallos see sex as “slightly important.” They are tied for the majority of alloallos. But do not despair, for 13.4% of them say they can go without. So alloallos willing to forego sex do exist, at least. It is a shame though, given 70.5% of aces can go without.

In terms of needing to be in a romantic relationship, 42.8% of aros can go without whereas 3.5% of them find it important. Meanwhile, it is very important to 15.2% of nonaros. Only 4.4% of nonaros can go without a romantic relationship.

Now, for questions that mattered most to me....

I had a theory that, acepecs who feel sexual attraction rarely are more likely to feel it stronger than allos, since allos feel it often enough to sort of “be used to it.” (I sure feel it comically strong and refuse to believe allos live life like that frequently!) Was my theory correct?

Not really. It turns out, allos are more likely to feel it strongly! Only 3.2% of aces feel it “strong” vs 15.0% for nonaces. To be fair, one of the definitions of falling into the ace spectrum is, feeling sexual attraction weakly. Which means we’ve got weak statistics on our end. 4.4% of demisexuals feel it strongly though- the highest of our groups. However, only 1.9% of nonaces feel it “very strong” vs 3.2% of graysexuals.(Of course, the graysexual category is vastly smaller than the nonace category, but that’s worth a mention.) So, there might still be some truth to my theory.

What about with arospecs and romantic attraction? 2.4% of aros feel that attraction “very strong” vs 9.0% of nonaros. However, 4.5% of demiros feel it “very strong” and 1.5% of grayros. What about just “strong”? 13.8% of grayros, 17% of demiros, 9.6% of aros,  21.5% of nonaros, 23.4% of alloaces, and 23.2% of alloallos.

Ever since I first discovered the ace spectrum, I wondered how many people allos are sexually attracted to. And alloros romantically attracted to. Is there a certain limit of people an aspec is allowed to be attracted to, until they get their ace/aro card taken away?

Nope! 1.5% of aces have it happen regularly, and 1.7% have had it towards 17+ people! Of course, 63% have never been sexually attracted to anyone, and 30.3% have been sexually attracted to 1-5 people. 3.2% felt it for 6-10. So, people of varying levels of sexual attraction have identified as ace. Nonaces, however, 32.4% experience sexual attraction regularly. Upon questioned “how regularly?” I got varying answers, ranging between a few times a year to a few times a month to a few times a week to even daily! And someone even implied that it was weird to keep count of such a thing! (Which was more validating for me than any validation post I’ve ever read, so thank you to the person who wrote that.)

Aros for people they’re romantically attracted to? Only 1.4% have it happen regularly, and 1.4% felt it towards 11-16 people. 4.5% felt it towards 6-10 people and 42% felt it towards 1-5 people. 50.5% never felt it. So, similar enough numbers to aces. As for nonaros? Only 6.3% have it happen regularly! (When questioned how often, many wrote multiple times a month or multiple times a year.) The vast majority of nonaros, 54%, answered 1-5 people. It looks like romantic attraction is a rare thing for everyone in comparison to sexual!

Maybe that’s why limerence is uncommon! 53.4% of all respondents have never felt limerence before. (Limerence here being boiled down to an obsession with someone, often to an unhealthy extent.) 17.3% felt it. 12.2% felt it, but wouldn’t call it “unhealthy.” And 17.1% are unsure. I asked this because, as someone who went through a bad case of it last year, I was curious to see how  many other people shared my plight. I actually threw the question in at the very last minute as an afterthought and, had I known how many people would take this, I would’ve asked for more details from respondents. I was also wondering if any aros have experienced it. And it turns out, 8.5% of those who are strictly aro have been through limerence, proving that it isn’t just an alloromantic thing, although 23.1% of nonaros have felt it.

There were two other questions I asked that I ended up too burnt out to even do anything with. The first was, “how often do you go out in public aside from school/work?” I asked this to see if there’s a correlation between the amount of people one is sexually/romantically attracted to with how often they leave the house. But it turns out, we are 2 years into a pandemic, so obviously, not many people are leaving the house. So that question ended up being useless. The other question was “how often do you seek out new visual media.” I asked that for a similar reason: People who seek out a lot of visual media, like tv shows, are going to see more people than someone who doesn’t. And seeing more people = more targets for sexual/romantic attraction. I can’t answer that one, because, too burnt out. But there’s numbers on the spreadsheet if you’re willing to sort through that mess to find out.

Last, but certainly not least, I asked if there was too much focus on sex in society. And if there was too much focus on romance in society. I wondered if allos felt the same way as most aces and aros in regards to the prominence of sex and romance. And it turns out they do! 37.2% of nonaces answered yes to “too much focus on sex.” 51.7% of nonaros answered yes to “too much focus on romance.” All across the board of all categories, the majority voted “yes.” 46% of alloallos answered “yes” on romance and 36.6% answered “yes” on sex. Of course, aces and aros had much higher percentages on the yeses, but that’s no surprise.

Looking at all of this, how some allos also have low libidos, how some allos can forego sex in a relationship, how some allos don’t have interest in being in a romantic relationship, how some allos also rarely experience attraction, that some of these allos could actually qualify as ace/arospec, right? That is why I ended the survey asking why they don’t consider themselves ace/arospec. One of the most common reasons seems to be, they don’t like using labels, or the label doesn’t fit them because they do feel attraction. A few mentioned they did when they were younger but stopped because it didn’t apply anymore. Meanwhile aspecs identify as such because, they feel at home in their label. It just fits right. 

So I guess, whether you are ace/arospec or allo, comes down to if you’re comfortable with that label. If you’re happy with it. If it brings you a sense of relief. If it describes you perfectly. Or if it’s simply closest thing that fits. There is no, one way to be aspec. There’s no strict, set of rules or criteria you must meet. It all comes down to how that label makes you feel. 

So there’s the results. Thank you to everyone who participated!