#but that doesn't mean you should sacrifice your mental health to do that

[bhaalble]

I like that Last Unicorn quote as much as the next guy but I do always wind up feeling a little detached from analysis that paints Astarion's disapproval as purely envy. Partly because. No one's doing this for Lae'zel for instance even though she has similar disapproval and similar trauma (all she can remember is a hostile physically and emotionally exploitative environment which expected perfect strength and obedience from her or else she would be punished or killed). But also partly because it feels pretty detached from everything he actually has to say about it.

The thing about Astarion is he loathes weakness. He loathes sentiment and he loathes dependence. You can see this when he actually opens his mouth up about the people he disapproves of saving, but also incredibly loudly when he talks about the other companions, as well as his fellow spawn. If Lae'zel submits to Vlaakith he talks scornfully about how some people just come to love their chains. He's confused and put off if Wyll submits to Mizora to save his father. In every conversation with his fellow spawn (at least when hes not actively manipulating them) he's dismissive and harsh, and clearly he's perfectly willing to sacrifice them for the sake of himself.

There's an obvious origin point of those feelings, of course. Cazador's abuse is designed to actively kill off empathy in his spawn, both towards each other and towards victims. The last time Astarion prioritized someone over his own skin he got locked in a tomb for a year. We can see glimpses of it with the other spawn too, how his siblings are (apparently uncompelled at first) willing to drag Astarion back to their master for their freedom, how Petras' first dream of freedom is getting to drain another person dry. Astarion certainly doesn't seem to feel any real sense of solidarity with them, likely because Cazador understands that them building a community is a threat to his authority the way it was to his own master.

I'd also argue its Astarion projecting his own self-loathing outwards. So much of his quest is about his desperate attempt to escape from who he was. He's been given a chance to slip free of the limitations of being a spawn. He clings to that because of course he would. He also instinctively begins to run over everything in his path, because if there's anything he has learned over the past 200 years its that good things can always be taken away unless you make sure to remove any and all possible threats to that scrap of well-being. He's disdainful of people in need of help because they represent who he fears to go back to being! He calls his siblings "poor fools" while refusing to confront the fact that had it not been for the tadpole he would be in exactly their position, forced to cling to the hope that Cazador is telling the truth for once because escape isn't an option either way. He becomes irritated when Tav slows down to help the unfortunate because they represent roadblocks on his own path to safety.

There's an idea in mental health stolen from airplane safety: that you shouldn't help anyone else until your own mask is secure. What they don't tell you, speaking from personal experience at least, is that PTSD, especially for long term trauma, has a way of making you feel like your own mask will never be secure. And while that's scary, and it sucks, and there should be the utmost patience for it: no one is going to realize that mask is secure for you. Eventually you are going to have to accept the fact that you are breathing just fine. Eventually you are also going to have to accept that people asking something of you isn't them endangering you, even if it can sometimes (often) feel like it. It doesn't make you obligated to help them. But it does mean you have to stop reacting to them like a threat, because not 5 minutes ago that was you.

I think the idea that he's only mad because he's jealous is a gratifying fantasy. He didnt feel safe before, but now through your PC and the power of love he'll feel warm and cozy enough to forgive you for not being there to begin with. But I also think Astarion cannot live in a reality where he's never pushed back on. His instinctive self-protective movements are a coping mechanism, yes, but coping mechanisms developed under survival conditions can also be a way of keeping you frozen in your trauma. Outside of the environment they were necessary for, they can even hinder you from growing in the ways you need to grow to move past what happened to you. Sometimes, you need to stop a baby tiefling from getting crazy murdered by a snake because it turns out. That can happen to anybody not just people who are weak and stupid and deserve to die anyways not like me I'm normal-

[yannisdesk]

On Arcane & Antivillains

One thing I really enjoy about Arcane is how it handles antivillains.

For one, most of the characters (main ones) would actually fall into the category of antivillain at one point, or in the case of our two protagonists, become one. Arcane is arguably ripe with them.

An antivillain is essentially the opposite of an antihero. Simplified, antiheros do good things out of selfish or questionable motives, antivillains do things that are objectively bad or evil, but for noble reasons or for a greater cause. Another term for them is "sympathetic villain" however that term is too vague (there are villains out there who are sympathetic, but are none the less traditionally evil and therefore do not qualify as antivillains), and "antivillain" is a much better term mirror to "antihero." A common thread I've noticed among antivillain characters is some level of a Machiavellian approach to achieving their goals - the ends justify the means type of philosophy is something you'll always find characters that fit this category. At the very least, they dabble with it. In their eyes their actions are always justified because they're fighting for a good cause.

To put things into perspective, I'll use two examples. Harley Quinn shifts around, but she is frequently an antihero, take her depiction in both Suicide Squad movies. She does take down bad guys, however she's not doing so out of a sense of altruism, but to get a reduced prison sentence. Very cut-and-dry example of antiheroism.

On the flip side you have Magneto. Now from what I've seen (I've dabbled in the comics, but haven't dived in all the way) in the comics he gets very dark with the antihuman action. But in the Xmen movies, he definitely does some down right villainous stuff, but his intention remains the same - he wants mutants to live in a world free of bigotry and he's willing to do anything necessary to achieve that, including committing atrocities.

Now if this sounds very confusing to you and you swear you've heard these terms interchangeably or that you can think of several characters that are labeled as type A when they should be type B or vice versa, that's pretty normal. These aren't archetypical heroes and villains we're talking about, so it can be hard to categorize them, and honestly most characters in general will go back and forth or shift at one point or another, so all you need to know is that those definitions are the ones we're working with in this post.

Here are the characters from Arcane that I think suit this label, and others that I think will.

Disclaimer: this is not me hating on the characters. I love all of these characters for this layer to their character. This is not a "oh, look, this character is bad actually," post. If anything, consider it a celebration of their gray morality and how well its explored in the show.

Silco

Duh. Silco is objectively pretty evil. Setting up a drug empire that destroys your own people, getting in-cahoots with corrupt cops, killing kids, and aiding in destroying a young girl's mental health is multiple levels of foul. However, for him, all of this was part of an elaborate plan to liberate Zaun, which is being aggressively oppressed by Piltover. They were necessary sacrifices made to the cause, and worth it because it will bring forth better days for him and his people. Now obviously, a lot of his actions definitely have to do with his own ego, however the only time Zaun isn't prioritized is when it comes to Jinx, who is like a daughter to him, and even that realization comes to smack in the face late in his arc.

Sevika

I'd argue she's even more noble than most since she truly is rooted in the cause for Zaun. Not only is she willing to do some pretty bad things for the "greater-good", she's even willing to betray people who she views as unfit or incompetent. And what's even more telling is that she doesn't do this for power (which is arguably a part of Silco's prerogative). Sure, she's his #2, but he doesn't exactly show any favoritism. And Sevika seemingly isn't even trying to become the new leader of Zaun after Silco's death from the season 2 clips, but will support Jinx, despite the fact that she probably could dethrone her. She's no true blue hero, but she's not a megalomaniac either.

The Entire Council of Piltover (Minus Mel & Jayce)

As obnoxious as they are, none of them are mustache-twirling villains. As we see with characters like Sheriff Grayson (not a council member, but they share the same sentiment), they legitimately think they're protecting the city with their neglectful leadership and oppression of Zaunites. Yes, this includes Heimerdinger, who seemingly only started caring about Zaun once he was booted out of the council, so that places him firmly in antihero territory in my opinion.

Why did I exclude Mel and Jayce? Their plots are actually upward in terms of morality, especially Jayce who by the end is closer to being a traditional hero by prioritizing peace and progress over the status quo or war, and actively makes the first move of trying to right Piltover's wrongs. Mel's arc has also moved this direction as well, as she went from arguing that Jayce and Viktor should build Hextech weapons in case of war with the Zaunites, to fully embracing peace. You could argue that Mel wanting the weapons means she was at some point an antivillain, and I might agree, but as it stands, she's firmly in the clear.

So, why are the rest of the council still considered antivillains? Honestly, we just don't know much about their motivations to say. They ultimately did a good deed in voting for peace, but you know, one good deed doesn't wash-out the bad and vice versa. They're not even on thin ice for me, they're still fighting for the surface.

Marcus

Questioning your actions does not mean you can't be an antivillain, and Marcus is a good example of that. He's is kind of like Caitlyn if she were way less compassionate and very incompetent. Marcus does not think his actions are evil, according to show runners he only places Vi in Stillwater to protect her from Silco; he gets involved with Silco because he wants justice for the building explosion and it goes out of hand. That said, he also threw a child into a dangerous prison with no charges and with the intention of keeping her there for life, and worked with a kingpin who was actively antagonizing his own people while reaping benefits from an abusive system. So yeah, Marcus falls more into being an antivillain than full-blown villain, he's still firmly an antagonist though.

Ambessa

I know it's very popular in the fandom to call Ambessa a traditional bad-guy type of villain, but she is actually very nuanced. For one - she does not see her actions as evil, nor are her motivations behind doing them rooted in it. Ambessa, as she states in Mel's flashback, was raised in the Noxian way. Her grandfather literally made her search the dead bodies of the people they massacred when she was a youth, and she was indoctrinated to believe that this was in the best interest of her family and the Noxian people. By showing strength and ruthlessness, she's telling the rest of the world: "Stay away from House Medarda and Noxus." Hence, why Kino's death wrecks her, because she values herself over how effective she is at warding people off from messing with her family. Her main reason for getting involved with the war between Piltover and Zaun will 100% be because Mel's life was nearly lost due to Jinx's bomb, and this is coming straight off of her son's death mind you. So, while Ambessa may definitely be one of the most ruthless people on this list, she is not at Palpatine levels of evil yet, not by a long shot.

Jinx

You guys saw this coming, right? This barely needs an explanation. Jinx grew up in the Lanes, was a victim of Piltover's oppression multiple times throughout her youth, was willing to fight for their freedom as seen in episode 2, and in the end, that desire, along with her being adopted by Silco, manifested in her doing multiple acts of violence, including terrorism against Piltover, which frequently hurt people who weren't guilty of anything. (No, blowing up the building in episode 3 doesn't count as one of her evil deeds because it was an accident.) We understand completely why Jinx does what she does, even though it hurts to see her slip farther and farther into this mindset.

Vi

Way more subtle (for now) but I'd argue she's there come episodes 8 and 9. Hell, you could argue that her arc is about her sense of morality breaking down due to realizing how impossible the situation between Zaun and Piltover is, and embracing an "ends justifies the means" type mindset that Vander tried to sway her against back in episode 2. Wanting to stop a kingpin from using this new dangerous drug to destroy your city and sister? A noble cause, indeed. Not really caring that (or being passive over the fact that) children die in process because of their approximation to said bad guy? Yikes. [EDIT: Since we're on this topic: here's a link to where I explored this aspect of her character. I did this a while ago, but I thought it best to include it here too for added context). Now, I know what some of you are going to say - how is this any different from, say, Steve Rogers telling Wanda Maximoff that sometimes there's collateral damage when doing hero work? The difference is that Steve didn't argue that those people had it coming because they're associated with the bad guys/or in their way, which Vi does. That's some dangerous conviction right there, and we'll probably see that elaborated on in season 2 given that she's becoming an Enforcer which is a position that lends itself to abuse of power (and if it goes anyway like things do with her game counterpart, she will engage in police brutality and not see an issue with it, but given that Arcane's Vi is way more well, nuanced, than her game counterpart I don't think it will go on for long). While we're on the topic of Vi, according to her prison records, she had a notorious reputation while doing time to the point that I find it funny Silco didn't put 2-and-2 together that the girl with short pink hair beating the shit out of and attempting to murder all of his goons that went to Stillwater was possibly the same girl that wiped the floor with those same goons the night Vander died.

Potential Antivillains of Season 2:

These are characters that I predict will become antivillains at some point during season 2 based off of where their season 1 arc left and clues from season 2 teasers and clips. This is not me saying for sure this will happen, only a prediction. But if it does come true, I will gladly collect $5 per accurate plot point.

Viktor

Two words: glorious evolution.

We all love Viktor. We all love good-guy Viktor, and we will also more than likely love not-so-good-guy Viktor due to how complex that arc will be. If it will go anything like his game-lore (which I suspect it will) his noble intentions will never leave him, just simply evolve to include some less-than-heroic actions and justifications. He still wants to improve the undercity, and well, humanity overall, with hextech, motivated by the injustices he's been put through his own life and his illness, but he will go about it in some very unorthodox ways, and his arc in Arcane is about him confronting if he wants to "evolve" his morality for the sake of his ultimate goal, which is progress. Viktor would definitely agree with the sentiment expressed by Gloria Steinem (character depiction, not a real quote) in Mrs. America - "Revolutions are messy, people get left behind."

Caitlyn

I'm pretty sure she actually will become apart of the antivillain roster in season 2, but noting is for certain. Caitlyn is perhaps the saddest version of this there is, because we see where she starts out. She doesn't want to be like everyone else in her circle, she tries to break free and be better. She wants to do good by both Piltover and Zaun. She has hope, gentleness, and doesn't place herself above even those who occupy the lowest levels of Zaun. She puts herself, her status, and her life on the line to discover the truth, and comes out her time with Vi steadfast in wanting to help heal Zaun. She can be a little naive and ignorant, but she never does so with malicious or ill intent. She is the kindest person in Arcane.

But, given that her mother was killed in a terrorist attack set off by the new Head Zaunite in Charge, things will change. As we see, Caitlyn becomes a sheriff on the Enforcer squad, and now her goal is no longer to sow peace between Zaun and Piltover, it's to avenge her mother by assassinating Jinx. Of course, this will be due in part that Caitlyn thinks snuffing Jinx out will solve the problem, which will be ironic and hypocritical because she told Ekko that getting revenge on Silco won't solve anything in Zaun, but now that she's in the same predicament, the tables have turned and now diplomacy is off the table. She still has that hero-complex, as she lives by the lessons of Sheriff Grayson, but now it's with a twist. The idealistic Caitlyn who believed in giving peace a chance through reform is gone, and she now believes that there's little to no cost too great for her to achieve this, even if that (possibly - again season 2 hasn't come out yet, so we shall see) means hurting innocent Zaunites. And what's scary is that Caitlyn has the intelligence, dedication, talent, and efficiency to pull it off. Truthfully, I believe we won't just be getting Sheriff Caitlyn in season 2, but also Dictator Caitlyn.

[dark-night-hero]

Hey so I found the little drabble you wrote about Morax sacrificing Y/n for the world? And it gave me this scene of a Y/n being forced to pick between him and the world, and they choose him? And it would hurt. And I'd like to see it written in your style of angst, if you ever write it at all, because i think it would be cool. have a good day/night heart🧡

: I know I'm very late but this gives me the idea of the prequel of the world > you of Morax|Zhongli imagine.

Imagine being in a situation where you have to sacrifice the world for your love one. What would you do? Would you choose to do the greater good for others or for yourself? The answer for you is quite obvious. It would be Morax over the world.

Imagine the Archon War leaving a mental toll on your mental health, constantly seeing your lover fighting, seeing him fight for his and your dear live as well as both of your people. But what leaves you the scar the most is seeing him get hurt, although he was powerful and fearsome, that doesn't mean that he does not escape close call encounter. At times like that, you have nothing to do but to watch there and stood in horror, thinking how much of a baggage were you that you cannot even fight side by side. Because even for a supreme being, you are weak.

Imagine it wasn't just the war that took a toll on you but also the mortals. You have seen people turning their back on their Gods, you have seen people revolts on their Gods, Gods who have done nothing but to protect them and some have lost their lives upon doing so. How fucking cruel and disgusting creatures were they. And how thankful you are that your people were different. That is why this thoughts and memories remained on the back of your mind.

Imagine, or so you thought as you day you have awoken up from a dream, drenched on cold sweat as your heart hammered on your chest. It was a dream- no a nightmare- no... It was a vision. It was a prophecy of your lovers death. Died and assassinated by his-your own people.

"Love?" It was your lover who seems to have been awake.

"Are you alright? You're dren-" You cut him off as you embraced him and he chuckles before turning your embrace, giving you a tap on the back for more comfort.

"Was it a bad dream?" He asked as pull you even more closer to him, taking you in his arms as you could only tighten your hold on him.

"It's alright, Love. I'm here, it's just a dream."

Imagine the truth is that you love your people more than anything, you love them just right after Morax, your lover. That is why you decided not to pay attention to that vision. Because you knew more than anything that your people respect and worship him more than anything.

Imagine Morax should have seen the signs. The way you less and lesser interact with the people. The more you seems cautious of the way they view and talked about him. The way you stay up all night and seems to be lacking of sleep. The way the look of gentleness in your eyes seems to fade the more you look at the people you vow yourself to protect. The way you were slowly falling and experiencing signs of erosion.

"What did you just say, you low life piece of utter shit?" You glare at the man, wanting to snap off his neck if it wasn't for your lover holding you back from doing so.

"I- I was just telling the truth! It's not like Rex Lapis is all that great and might- hick!"

"It's not like I did not heard you the first time. What I'm tying to say it that, do you, know the consequence you have to face for saying such-"

"That's enough, (First name). I would like to apologise on behalf of my lover, they were just.."

Imagine becoming aware that you were losing yourself but it was already too late. All the sleepless nights, the visions that kept showing up and hunting you. The way the people in your vision- your prophecy doesn't even seem to mind that Morax have died. The way the people talks about him these days. The way your memories of the archon war and the people back in those days does not seem to think twice turning their back and raising their weapons on their own beloved Gods.

Imagine one day, you snap. Walking in the city with your fake persona. There comes the man who was just talking shit about Morax on the other day. And the nerve of this man to continue to convince you that he was in fact right, that the world is better off without the Archons, specifically Morax in it, the God of War. The one who seems to have killed the God he was formerly worshipping. The one who according to him should have died instead.

Imagine as his words went one ear to another, you smile at him before talking and convincing him to go on a remote area where no one could see the two of you and of course, bewitched by your beauty, how could he not come with you. Only to get himself killed not even a second the moment the two of you reach your promised location. And during those very moment, the way you look down at your blood stained hand. The way a smile crept up on your lips as a strange sense of satisfaction came into you.

"This is fun." You spoke looking at the bloody scene.

"This is what you get for assume you know better to turn your back against by beloved."

Imagine Morax becoming aware of the missing and killing of people within your land. But what raised his concerns the most is that you don't even seem to mind, but at least you were not going feral as you were quite some time now. So he brush it off and went to investigate only to find out that most of the people declared missing and dead were people who were talking bad about him. Most of those people were refugees of the wars and were formerly worshipping other Gods before him. Nevertheless it was still suspicious and wrong. You have always made it clear with him that people, mortals were fragile being, that is why you should protect them.

so Imagine the horror on Morax face once he have seen you, in the midst of the burning remote village, a bloody child in your hand, grabbing it on the neck as you held it up within your level, a smile on your face which become even more bright one you have seen him when it pained him even more than to see you this way. How could he have not notice this? You were always together, how could he have not notice you were slowly losing youself?

"Wha-" His voice cracked as his mind tried to came up hundreds if not thousand of reason why you have come into this conclusion.

"What- why are you doing this?"

"They were planning a rebellion Morax, how could I not let this slide?"

"No... no no no no no no no. My Love, what happened to you?"

"Huh? You're asking strange things Morax." Your eye twich as you drop the child on the ground without care.

"Let me handle this kind of things. There is no need for you to lift up a finger okay? I'll keep you safe so let's go home, okay? Thought I'll have to come back and clean up for the rest of them so their is nothing to harm you."

Imagine the moment you tried to walk towards him, you stopped at the way his iconic weapon, a pole arm appeared. Then a smile makes it's way on your lips as you clasp your bloody hand together.

"Oh Morax! I appreciate you trying to help but there is in no need of that-?"

Imagine the look of confusion in your face. The way his weapon was pointed at you, you tilt your head to the side, a look of confusion and hurt could be seen in your face. And then there was anger.

"I am doing this for YOU whaT GIVES YOU THE NERVE TO POINT YOUR WEAPON AT ME?" You screamed at him, sending glares on his way as he looks at you emotionless. As if all emotion of him were turned off.

"Doing this for me? Do you think that was enough reason to do this? To cause this?"

"They were trying to revolt against you! They were trying to kill you! Do you think I want this?! I kept having visions! I kept hearing voices! And every single damnn time they were trying to kill you! And you died! Living me alone! I could not handle that! So before everything of that come true, I'll kill them. I'll fucking get rid of them. So don't be mad at me okay? I'm doing this for you, for us." You smile sweetly at him.

Imagine Morax having a mental breakdown at those very moment. The way he was tightly holding his pole arm as you approached him with a sweet smile on your face and damn. How lovely you were in the midst of the burning town and the countless lives taken away by your very own hands.

Imagine him, one of the seven archons praying and begging at these very moment. Oh celestia. Not you, god fucking damn. Not you. This was just a dream, none of this was true. But damn, the way he felt someone, another child clinging on his feet, murmuring cries of help. He swallowed back a sob. Oh celestia, what could- what should he do?

Imagine the way his hand shake, the way he took a deep breath before leaving his chaotic mind behind. His hands were still shaking, but he held his firmly up on your direction. The way you start to emits black smoke as well as the cracks on your face says it was already too late to save you. And as much as it pained him, as much as it fucking kills him to kill you. He has to do it.

"So this is it for us?" You spoke across him.

"No one's going to hurt me, Love."

"My vision says different and you know my vision was never wrong." You chuckle as you did not stop coming at him.

"I know what you're thinking. I don't regret it." The more you approach him, the more his heart ached.

"If I am to make choices over and over again, I'll do the same thing. If it means turning thr world outside the down, if it means burning the world for you, I will, Morax."

Imagine the way his amber iris were shaken as you walked right into his weapon that was preventing you from approaching him. The way his weapon easily and smoothly pierced your chest as he held it firmly.

Imagine the way his mouth close and open, looking down to his weapon and onto you. He saw you smiling as you pull away from the blade of the pole arm, stumbling a couple of stepps backwards but still retaining your balance. He knows that smile, fuck. He knows that smile.

"Celestia. Perhaps, I have done things too far." You spoke as you look down at your bloody hand and chest.

Imagine the way Morax hold back a sob, the way his throat burns as he can't seem to find the right words to say to you. And at the very end, he could only lower his weapon as he utter the words he wanted you to know even after all of this.

"You know I love you, right?"

[ⓒdark-night-hero] 2023°

: Hi, sorry if this takes too long to make. College seems to drain me out but I'm glad to answer this ask that I have been thinking for quite some time now.

[trekkele]

Patriach!!!!!! I love that fic it's so good and it really made me think about Bruce's relationship with Leslie

*spoilers*

So many Fics have Bruce not liking going to Leslie and I never really thought about it because that's how it's always been

But when Dick starts to point out that Bruce would rather bleed in an alleyway then face one of her lectures and I just sat there

Because kids really want to be accepted!!! And hearing only criticisms all the way well into adulthood will 100% destroy your mental health, and when you think about how much effort and sacrifices Bruce probably had to make to train under the best of the best, only for Leslie (who had an impact on him growing up but also was his dad coworker/friend) to dismiss all of it and tell him that violence is not the answer*.... It must of hurt

(*which is bull, we've been spilling blood for every freedom for as long as we've been around, open a history book Leslie)

I said this once (I think in dms with @wanderintofics) but I think it's very funny how Alfred has been cast into this overbearing mother role and Leslie has been cast as the distant and disappointed father role. Because where Alfred will relentlessly criticize Bruce, and withold care or affection if he feels Bruce doesn't deserve it, he will also always, always come back to Bruces side. It's a whole thing! Meanwhile Leslie will never whithold care, she's a doctor, she's a good doctor, but she will absolutely side with those criticizing Bruce whenever possible.

I think the fact that Leslie has been criticizing him this way since he's a kid influences it the most. Because hearing that your choices are a disappointment and your dead parents would be ashamed of you is. Not great!! Ever!! And since Alfred is literally an employee of the estate, Leslie is technically the only person in his life who gets nothing from him and isn't interested in pleasing or pacifying him. Alfred's criticism would hurt, of course, but there's also a level of "he's meant to be raising me into the perfect heir". Leslie has no such responsibilities, and that means her criticism is entirely personal.

There are two ways to write Leslie, and one is Watsonian (she represents an in universe belief) and the other is Doylest (she represents Batman critics in our universe). And my problem with her as a Doylest criticism is you cannot apply our universe rules to a universe with superheroes. The entire argument against capes falls apart with the first alien invasion. More then that, it simply isn't an interesting critique of the genre, because it inevitably falls into doomerisms and nihilism and I am supremely uninterested of that view of the world.

The Watsonian critique is slightly more interesting, because it at least has Leslie (reasonably!) acknowledge that she lives in a universe where superheros do exist, she is just personally against them. And my issue there is that Leslie is a militant pacifist, which boils down to "she believes you should also die for her beliefs". And. No.

She also believes that all violence is equal, when it clearly isn't and has never been, and insisting that it be treated as if it is is disingenuous and unhelpful. Its how we get people in prison for killing their abusers even in the most clear cut of cases. I disagree with her philosophy in the real world, and not even in a way that means I can agree in the fictional world, if that makes sense.

Leslie is a great character and I think she's very interesting even when I disagree with everything she's saying. I wish she had more screentime as n antagonist. Steph, for one, should not trust her ever again.

[hadesoftheladies]

"you are killing a baby"

i am killing a fetus, not an infant. an egg is not a chicken. potential is not actuality.

"you are murdering an innocent."

it doesn't matter who is innocent. a hungry lion may be innocent in wanting to eat me only because it is hungry and may not have the cognitive capacities to exercise something like restraint or conscience. that does not mean i should not defend myself from harm. it is still self-defense. all animals are expected to protect themselves first and foremost. you are just so used to the idea that women (especially mothers) are supposed to sacrifice their lives for their children in order to be good people--like they aren't human beings with self-preservation instincts.

harm equals anything that threatens the life or health of a person and pregnancy does both.

"your body was meant/designed to do this"

miscarriages are as natural as pregnancies. why do you think the placenta exists? pregnancy sickness? the female body can grow a person, yet also has resistance mechanisms for a pregnancy.

also, just because i have genes that make me a good runner doesn't mean i have to become a marathoner. like think for a second.

"what will the father think?"

women don't owe men or society themselves. i know that's very hard for you to grasp but there's no time like the present to start. there is no ethical way to make a woman a commodity or government assigned asset for reproduction or sex.

"the baby is conscious"

so is the lion in the hypothetical. also, that's debatable. also, what are your thoughts on veganism? since you care so much about the suffering of conscious beings (that is beings with selves)

"but animals aren't humans. they don't deserve the same rights as humans because of their lower cognitive capacities"

great. now apply this ethic to babies and mentally disabled people and then try to explain to me why that has to be different without mentioning how you feel or your religion. :)

"a baby has more potential than an animal."

okay, and why does that potential automatically mean better or more valuable? higher cognitive capacities haven't stopped wars and mass murders have they? (and i would argue that bringing a child into a violent world increases their chance of becoming unhealthy or complicit persons, so you can almost know what the character of your child will be like for certain based on where you're raising them).

"a baby has a soul"

there are two kinds of dualisms within christianity: thomistic and cartesian. cartesian dualism has gone out of fashion even amongst christian theologians and philosophers.

Substance dualism, or Cartesian dualism, most famously defended by René Descartes, argues that there are two kinds of foundation: mental and physical. Descartes states that the mental can exist outside of the body, and the body cannot think.

'Thomistic substance dualism' (TSD) centers around two beliefs: 1) the rational soul is an immaterial substance, and 2) this immaterial substance is the human person.

aside from the fact that both of these philosophies are rife with problems, I think thomistic dualism is the stronger of the two. the rational soul is, in a way, a word for the self.

regardless, both of these describe a self as a soul. so i'm just going to define a self.

The psychology of self is the study of either the cognitive and affective representation of one's identity or the subject of experience. The earliest formulation of the self in modern psychology forms the distinction between two elements I and me. The self as I, is the subjective knower. While, the self as Me, is the subject that is known.

a self is a centralized consciousness with their own memories, introspection and reflections. we know through neuroscience, psychology, behavioural science and sociology that a person or self is formed via experiences (where memories and impressions are gathered, how people learn), language and socialization (economy, history, family, culture) and possibly some genetic expressions (although i think this is more about capacity than actualization).

this is why things like dementia or alzheimer's are so scary and difficult. when a person loses memories, they lose aspects of themselves. when a person changes their environment, they also become different people (even while maintaining some similarities with their past selves).

this is mirrored in popular media, characters that lose their memories lose versions of themselves. this is also why, when you look at stories that feature a multiverse, the same character becomes a different person in different lives. in short, you are not born a person. you become one, and although your self remains singular and centralized (even with age), that self still changes. both the self and the people around the self create the self.

this is also why socially isolated individuals devolve and become mindless or sick (and even have reduced lifespan). certain higher human capacities like "conscience" or "empathy" can be socialized out of a human being, as well. i'd even go so far as to say that children begin conceptualizing themselves as individuals only when they begin to sense the presence of other human beings. they cannot conceptualize their own identity without the presence of other people. they probably don't know they are a self until they recognize other people and then realize they themselves are also people, and people are individuals.

legally a person is:

. . . an entity that the law recognises as having its own distinct personality. This usually means one that is able to act in its own right, and capable of possessing legal rights and liabilities, including individuals (or "natural persons") and corporate organisations.

my point is, how can a fetus with virtually no experiences (which born animals have), no language or skill (learned) to introspect or reflect (or abstract), possibly have a self? when they are not exposed to the outside world? certainly they have the capacity to develop a self, but as established earlier on, potential is not actuality. so legally and psychologically, a fetus is very likely not a person.

but we do not need this to be true to justify abortion regardless, because an innocent person is still causing harm, whether directly or indirectly. so the woman/girl has every right to resist.

[blueeyescleo]

There comes a point in life where you need to stop chasing toxic people.

And start seeking a mentally stable partner who reciprocates back your efforts and consistency.

Here are a few things I have learned over the years to keep your relationship stable.

Date nights are a necessity. Just because you already have the person you want and you have been together for a substantial amount of time does not mean you should stop making those efforts.

Don’t ever just assume...that your partner feels loved.

Do small things for your partner, like sending them a loving text message throughout the day, planning a picnic at the lake, or even a late night drive in the country. It doesn't have to cost money. Just catch them off guard.

Never punish someone you're in a relationship with for the mistakes made by the one before them.

Talking openly about what you're not comfortable with, because uncomfortable conversations lead to healthy relationships.

Learn each others love languages and apply them to the relationship.

Never make permanent decisions based on temporary emotions.

Being in a stable relationship isn't always 50/50. There will be some days that will be 80/20, and your partner will struggle, so you will have to pick up that extra percentage without hesitation because of the love you carry for one another.

When you get into a disagreement, don’t just tell them you're sorry. Tell them what you're sorry for and how you will react differently next time.

Always take the time to check on each other’s mental health.

Love each other with every heartbeat that passes and always fight for one another.

Relationships aren't that difficult.

People, this day and age, are just too lazy to make sacrifices and time and put in the effort.

~ Cody Bret

[mbti-notes]

Anon wrote: Hi, I'm a troubled INFJ asking on how to find an answer for a dilemma I'm having w my family members. I don't truly hate, but I lack affection for my father and sister; caring for them doesn't bring me comfort.

I grew up in a poor family. From a young age, I witnessed my father indulging in gambling and abusing my mother. Our conversations at home were often filled with yelling and swearing. My mother, despite her kindness and sacrifice, couldn't restrain my father's behavior (I believe my mom is ISFJ). We endured many nights of fear and tears as my father gambled away our livelihood. My father never cared about our education or well-being; his selfish pursuits always came first. He never provided for us financially, spending all his earnings on gambling and accumulating debt.

My sister dropped out of school early and never held a stable job. She is stubborn and refuses to listen to advice. Despite my mother's efforts to support her, my sister remains dependent and directionless. As for me, I finally completed university and secured a stable job despite tons of obstacles that could have made me give up halfway. I contribute financially to support my family, paying off debts and even purchasing land and building a house for my sister. However, the lack of love and warmth in my family has left me feeling lonely and disconnected.

I fear marrying someone like my father and becoming trapped in a cycle of misery. At home, I fulfill my responsibilities but keep my distance emotionally. I provide for my family's needs, but I find myself only caring for my mother, not my father or sister. I wonder if I'm selfish or afraid of responsibility for feeling this way. How do I find an answer to this question myself?

---------------------

Growing up in a poor family isn't the issue. The real issue is that you grew up in an abusive environment and thus haven't learned what healthy relationships should look like.

What exactly do you mean when you use the word "responsibility"? Okay, common sense dictates that you are responsible for yourself and the choices you make. But are you responsible for your father or sister and the choices they have made? Do you have a responsibility to fix their mistakes and compensate for their bad behavior? Are you solely responsible for keeping the family together when half of the members don't care?

Yes, it's important to be a responsible person if you want to feel like you have good moral character. However, taking on more responsibility than is reasonable for a single person to shoulder is a serious problem in several ways:

1) It is damaging to your well-being. Responsibility comes with stress, and stress has a deleterious effect on both physical and mental health. Taking on the responsibilities of others compounds stress dramatically. Your capacity to handle stress is finite, which means that you will eventually feel burn-out or experience a mental breakdown or lash out destructively (Se grip).

2) It makes you ripe for mistreatment. Lack of healthy boundaries is a common symptom of Fe overindulgence in INFJs, i.e., it is a problem that needs to be remedied as part of your type development. Taking responsibility for someone else's decisions means that their problems become your problems. If you allow this to happen again and again, you are broadcasting to the world that you are an easy target for manipulation and exploitation. All they have to do is activate your guilt and you'll take care of whatever they throw at you. You'll become a doormat at best and a victim at worst.

3) It rewards other people's bad behavior. Facing up to negative consequences is essential for human learning and improvement. When you take responsibility that should rightfully belong to someone else, you are essentially shielding them from the consequences of their behavior. When there is always someone else to clean up messes for them, what incentive do they have to clean it up themselves? If anything, they are incentivized to make even bigger messes. This makes you complicit in their bad behavior because you are enabling it. When you or your mother are excessively "supportive", you might actually be making this unhealthy family dynamic worse.

Your question implies that you have a duty to always be caring and loving to everyone in your family no matter what. Why do you hold this belief? Do you come from a culture that tells you family is everything and going against them is always a betrayal? There's nothing I can say to help if this is truly what you want to believe.

A healthy family should have a sense of equality and equity. Every member of the family should contribute a fair share. Every member of the family should care enough to only take what is needed (as opposed to take advantage of kindness). Every member of the family should get enough love and support.

When one member of the family behaves in a way that is harmful to the other members, they no longer deserve the privileges of membership. Social "responsibility" shouldn't be one-sided. A relationship is like a social contract where both parties agree to terms and conditions that aim to keep the relationship healthy and thriving. When one party intentionally breaks the contract over and over again, you no longer owe them the duty of carrying out your portion of the contract. Is it reasonable to force yourself to like/love someone who has repeatedly shown that they don't like/love you? Wouldn't this amount to torturing yourself?

Perhaps you think it makes you a bad person for turning on family. Nobody is saying that you have to do bad things to your father and sister or treat them cruelly. The point being made here is that you have a right to be treated with respect and you deserve care as well. And when people don't treat you with respect and care, you have a right to protect yourself from their harmful behavior by pulling away from them physically and emotionally. In other words, you have a right to your personal space, you have a right to set rules of social engagement, and you have a right to end any interaction/relationship that hurts you. Having healthy boundaries means being assertive in advocating for your own needs and well-being.

If you don't learn to set healthy boundaries in your family, this problem is very likely to carry over into your friendships and romantic relationships. Do you want this feeling of loneliness to come up again and again? If not, what you need to do is learn to seek love from the right sources. Family or not, do not hope or beg for a person to reciprocate your love when they have shown you that they are not capable of love. This is part of what it means to have self-respect.

[moralesmilesanhour]

I'd love to hear what fundamental issues you have with spiderverse... 🎤

Hm I'm just gonna rattle off a few from most to least important before I forget (note: some of my issues with spiderverse are less about the concepts or characters themselves but more about how the writers or producers chose to handle them, or even just exploring the possibilities of what could've been. I still think it's a really excellent movie and complex story.)

If you're someone that skims through longer paragraphs a lot, I've also put my most important points in italics so that you get the gist of what I'm saying :)

Making Miles' story about everyone else but Miles. I understand that Miles' whole thing in Spiderverse is that by defying the odds, he inspires the people around him. But there's a certain point where the story become *about that* and the other characters more than him and his interiority. In its efforts to focus on his growing into the mantle of Spider-Man, the films only kind of allude to the fact that he has a life outside of the mask. His mental health and relationship to his community are pushed to the wayside so much that even Ganke is only on-screen for a few minutes at most.

(This is a long one sorry) Spiderverse as a movie doesn't seem to know for sure whether it likes cops or not. It presents the literal police and policing as a concept as something that is inherently neutral, likening it to the mantle of Spider-Man where they simply have power that they have to use responsibly, and that there are just "bad apples". But the way that Spider-Society operates quite closely parallels how policing and criminality work: you have a bunch of spiders go out and detain people and send them where they're "supposed to be" under the guise that a) the order of things will essentially fall apart if you don't, and b) there is a specific way that your story is supposed to go, and you should be willing to sacrifice lives to maintain that status quo. There's also the categorization of those who break those rules as an Other (anomalies), and the fact that Spider Society reacts to the presence of the anomalies instead of addressing the thing that created them (the collider. HELLOOOO). With all that being said, Miguel and the rest of Spider Society are clearly framed as anatgonistic forces by the film and even has a punk anarchist character calling them out and being right about it. The movies simultaneously critique policing metaphorically through Spider Society while trying to justify it in the real world.

Girl where is Pavitr. His character is literally perfect for Miles to interact with, but we don't see him again until the very last scene. Same thing with...literally everyone we just met. The movie is over two hours long, where did all that time go--OH WAIT

Gwen and the scene with her dad take up wayyyy too much of the movie's runtime, I'm sorry. We spent the entirety of the beginning of the film learning information about Gwen and her dad that could've been quickly conveyed in much less time. Not to mention that, apparently, Mr. Stacy literally gets fired in the comics for letting Gwen go, so that whole plotline didn't even need to happen. Why change that? To say he's a 'good cop' that does his job? The trauma of losing Peter would've been present in her story either way.

The art style. No, this doesn't mean what you think it does. I do not have an issue with the 3D and 2D hybrid style of animation obviously. Spiderverse has literally revolutionized the field, but there are some limitations to it that were made especially clear once TMNT:MM came out. You may or may not have noticed, but isn't almost everyone in Spiderverse...kinda gorgeous? Hear me out here. Someone has pointed this out before me, and it really changed the way that I look at aesthetics in animation. In Spiderverse, everything from the environments to the way that things are shaded and colored is extremely stylized and pushed quite far...until you get to the main characters. Yes, there is diversity in features the likes of which we haven't seen 'till recently, but I'm purely talking about the style in which they're drawn. Compared to everything else, they look closer to something Disney or Pixar might produce. This is not inherently problematic or "bad", but I do wonder how much cooler and cutting-edge and comic-y we could get if it wasn't so pre-occupied with beauty. You can disregard this one, it's just a thought. Apparently the idea that not every cartoon character you see on the big screen has to be hot makes people very angry.

I think those are all the big ones. I'll reblog with new additions if for some reason I come up with new things to complain about lmao

[aotopmha]

And I'm done with the lvl 87 Endwalker quests, ending on the Venat cutscene.

The very first thought that jumps out to me is actually an annoyance: I really don't care for when the story uses jumpscares.

The only time during the game I have thought it was effective happened to be with Edda and it's because the mood was built for it in different ways.

It didn't work with Titania's introduction and it effectively annoyed me with Meteion.

Her transitioning to a grown woman's voice and listing off the dead worlds in a robotic tone was effective enough.

But they just keep doing the jumpscares with her and the more they do the less effective it is for me.

But to transition to some more character thoughts, I love how Hermes's words towards Meteion are also relevant towards Hermes himself.

"Though I gave you these wings to soar the heavens, I did not teach you how to walk the earth."

In the end, as Emet said, Hermes could not see anything good right in front of him on Etheirys. He simply could not find happiness or purpose in his own world, so he hoped to find it in others.

And so it lead to his flawed question and the painful result of it for the rest of the world and Meteion.

He hoped he would find the answer for his quest for meaning in other worlds. Perhaps use those discoveries to pave the way for a more empathic world that did not deny negative feelings. Perhaps to convince the ancients all lives had value. Perhaps to find companionship in his sadness and loneliness.

It was a two-sided issue, as the ancients also worked to not look at negativity, which probably would have had some bad consequences on a bigger scale eventually, no matter how you look at it.

Again, we go back to the idea of mental illness creating tunnel vision. All Hermes could see was the flaws of the society, but the society itself also did not address the issues within. (Or did they, looking at some of the side quests in Elpis?)

Across all of Endwalker, the idea of emotional resillience has popped up over and over again.

And when I first reached some of the parts about emotional resillience while watching someone else's playthrough, I really wasn't sure about the story leaning into the idea of "what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger".

Thavnair especially felt this way.

And that perspective is incredibly hostile towards the individualised nature of emotional struggles. What doesn't kill you does not, in fact, always make you stronger.

But Elpis and everything afterwards put in a lot of effort to make it much more nuanced than that.

"As fragmented, imperfect beings, yours is a never-ending quest. A quest to find your purpose, knowing your end is assured. To find the strength to continue, when all strength has left you. To find joy, even as darkness descends. And admist deepest despair, light everlasting."

Might just be the most important quote of Endwalker.

In reality what the game says (at least what I think the writers aim to say and I read the story as) is that we should try to appreciate the good when we have it because it isn't eternal.

And yet we should not look away from the bad and instead digest it in a healthy way.

As I touched on a few lines above, I think the point of the characterisation of the ancients is that negative feelings hurt, but burying and invalidating them will end up hurting more and more and eventually lead to some sort of issues.

Therapy good.

And as the Ascians show us, their tactics just lead to more and more sacrifices, to the point where it started feeling worse and worse and the rift between the two sides of the ancients happens.

The world of the ancients treats mental illness just like our world does and this story is simply commenting on the current mental health crisis, which was even worse during Covid times.

I'll touch on it more in my upcoming posts because I know that Alisae has a few really important lines regarding this idea, but I know I had this criticism for a while and I was really happy the story addressed it.

Another criticism I see Endwalker given is related to precisely the idea that by creating this causal loop the game implies all of this suffering HAD to happen (and that is why it is okay), everyone had to be sundered to survive and thus it fully also excuses Venat's actions.

But to me the nuance here is that while the game agrees with Venat, it never says what she did was "right".

"I create a world of suffering to mire and plague."

She created so much suffering by sundering the world.

And to me that's what makes it interesting. The Goddess of Light, image of "all good" was driven by her own very human beliefs to save humanity, which also lead to much suffering.

Neither side is completely right or wrong and to me that's the most interesting part of this.

Even if affinity to Dynamis was necessary for humanity to survive.

Even if the 13th is an useless void so the full Rejoining was never possible to begin with.

Even if the Ancients just kept sacrificing themselves and were on a path of unsustainable self-destruction, Venat still caused untold suffering with her choice.

And she takes full responsibility for it.

And to me that's a super cool element to the struggle between the two sides of the ancients.

Because on the other side, the Ascians absolutely were driven by love for their people. This was true all the way through.

Duty, love, desire to get back their paradise. There WAS so much beauty and actual kindness in the ancient world, it just had its own struggles, just like the present world gas its own.

Both sides were literally fighting for the same thing.

One looking to the past. One looking to the future.

And I just do not get why people have the need to appoint the right and wrong in this conflict when I think both having their own flaws is the entire point (and far more interesting to me).

I think Venat's manouvering after Hermes uses Kairos goes under this, too.

Her decisions are all driven by her personal perspective as a character (what she believes in, what she gleaned from Meteion's words etc). I've seen her judgements and the memory erasure be criticised as too wishy-washy on a writing level, but I like it because it is so tied to the characters of those affected.

To me her caution and hesitation makes sense considering what is at stake, especially.

I think Emet is the shaky one because I feel he would look into this as deeply as he could. He accepts his memory being gone a little too easily, I think, but I take it considering the biggest tangible loss we see is two familiars (Meteion and WoL).

Finally, I'll comment on the dungeon.

I think Ktisis Hyperboreia is probably my least favourite of the Endwalker dungeons up to this point.

But that also doesn't mean I hate it. I just think we've had so much cooler set pieces and also much cooler bosses with cooler mechanics in other dungeons.

This IS a dungeon in the ancient world with you exploring an ancient facility and you get the ancients as Trusts, which is super cool, but outside of the final third almost being space, it didn't feel particularly unique or interesting to me as a set piece.

I did notice a bunch of bird cages in a room and the notes, but setting aside, the first two bosses in particular were nothing special to me mechnically, either.

The Hermes boss fight did cause some wipes, though. The beams had a very particular pacing a positioning, which caught me off guard and others in the team also had forgotten the fight so we had 4-5 wipes at the Hermes fight, I think.

Overall, though, once again, a very solid bit of story in my eyes.

[2treez]

There comes a point in life where you need to stop chasing certain people.

And start seeking a mentally stable partner who reciprocates back your efforts and consistency.

Here are a few things I have learned over the years to keep your relationship stable.

Date nights are a necessity. Just because you already have the person you want and you have been together for a substantial amount of time does not mean you should stop making those efforts.

Don’t ever just assume...that your partner feels loved.

Do small things for your partner like sending them a loving text message throughout the day, planning a picnic at the lake, or even a late night drive in the country. It doesn't have to cost money. Just catch them off guard.

Never punish someone you're in a relationship with for the mistakes made by the one before them.

Talking openly about what you're not comfortable with, because uncomfortable conversations lead to healthy relationships.

Learn each others love languages and apply them to the relationship.

Never make permanent decisions based on temporary emotions.

Being in a stable relationship isn't always 50/50. There will be some days that will be 80/20 and your partner will struggle, so you will have to pick up that extra percentage without hesitation because of the love you carry for one another.

When you get into a disagreement, don’t just tell them you're sorry. Tell them what you're sorry for, and how you will react differently next time.

Always take the time, to check on each other’s mental health.

Love each other with with every heart beat that passes and always fight for one another.

Relationships aren't that difficult.

People this day and age are just too lazy to make sacrifices, time and put in the effort.

~ Cody Bret

🌳🫶🏼🌳

[tomemyxxmen]

Welcome   to   my   blog   for   a   study   in   mutant   shenanigans.   This   blog   will   deal   with   themes   that   include   ---   narcissism,   racism,   alcohol   addiction,   sexual   and   physical   abuse,   anxiety,   poor   mental   health,   loyalty   among   friends,   healthy   relationships   versus   toxic   ones,   sacrifice,   the   greater   good,   betrayal,   inspiring   hope,   found   family,   love   after   loss   and   mental   peace.   ---   🛑   READ   THIS   POST   IN   FULL   BEFORE   APPROACHING   ME.

STATUS:  OPEN FOR SHIPPING ( LIMITED ) CURRENT MAINS/AFFILIATES: tba CURRENT EXCLUSIVES:

CURRENT  ACTIVITY  STATUS:  HIATUS W/ LIMITED ACTIVITY  || I work full time meaning I work at least 40 hours a week / 5 days a week. I have kids which means I never get a day off. I’m also dealing with mental health issues. Please understand that while I try not to leave people hanging, my real life will always come first. My activity is sporadic and 'as i feel like it'. I won't apologize for it.

MOST WANTED CONNECTIONS:   Jean Grey, Hank McCoy, Wolverine / Logan, Namor, T'Challa, Okoye, Steve Rogers, Bruce Wayne, Emma Frost, Apocalypse, Dr. Strange, and many more...

:｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

Please understand before you follow me that I don’t always follow back right away or at all. I love a small dash with barely anyone on it except for me and my replies. If this is a deal breaker for you then I am sorry.

I  AM  NOT  MUTUALS  ONLY.  Non-mutuals may interact but I reserve the right to ignore anyone I don’t want to interact with or I feel I won’t vibe with at all.

I  DON’T  FILL  OUT  INTEREST  CHECKERS  OR  PERMANENT  STARTERS.  Unless you’re a terrible writer, a smut blog or your canons contradict my vision for my muses, then odds are I may be willing to interact eventually.

I  am over the age of  21  (  30+  TO  BE  EXACT  ) which means I will only play with adults. No age on your blog, no interactions. No exceptions.

COVID IS NEVER A TOPIC TO BE USED IN INTERACTIONS. Terminal illnesses are my hard no forever and always.

SMUT CAN HAPPEN. Smut will happen but that doesn't mean I'm interested in indie PWP blogs.

I drop threads ALL THE TIME. This is a hobby. Not a paid gig. Although... you're more than welcome to pay me for your time. Otherwise never hound me for anything. That's a great way to get blocked.

If you blog politics / political shit unrelated to RP, I will block you. I am an American and trust me. I'm well aware of all the sad stuff going on around the world. I don't want to see constant posts telling ME how I should feel.

LASTLY,  I am not perfect and much like everyone else around here, mistakes have been made. However,  i’ve never  tolerated any kind of common problematic behavior.  PLEASE  COME  TO  ME  POLITELY  IF  YOU  SEE  SOMETHING  THAT  MAKES  YOU  UNCOMFORTABLE.   I will not tag every trigger ever but if there’s something that you feel I should genuinely know or change, I am willing to listen IF you approach me politely and not aggressively or in a condescending manner. Tone matters.

:｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

[ ALL PROMOS, MOBILE HEADERS, DASH ICONS, RP ICONS, BANNERS & THEME WERE CODED BY THE LOVELY  cerberuscommissions​. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Please do not steal. I give her full credit for all main graphics used on this blog, even if i sometimes forget to mention it in posts. IN ADDITION,  ALL of my gif icons were commissioned and paid for by me. DO NOT STEAL MY THINGS. ]

:｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

ASK MEMES || PSA || HCs

[stormblessed95]

Hello, I found your blog and I would like to know your opinion (English is not my native language, sorry if there are errors). I was reading some of your posts, I don't know if you already addressed this. It's something that's on my mind. I don't consider myself a shipper, but I do think that Jimin and Jungkook have a relationship beyond friendship ♡ I avoid associating with or following jkkrs not bc I don't believe in jikook but bc fighting with other shippers affects me. I am Jimin biased and insults towards him really hurt me. It's not that JK/Tae doesn't receive them and doesn't bother me, but that they show themselves differently towards hate. Jimin became more and more reserved, away from social media. And his words still resonate in my mind in Seoul PTD "I don't do / don't like fanservise" It is obvious that he must have read something, it's not a random phrase. A lot of the hate that Tae is receiving from jkkrs or pjms towards Tae/JK is because they blame them, and I won't deny I also started to get annoyed. That was another sign that I stayed away from jkkrs. My ground wire is that if Jimin isn't distant towards them why should I get mad? I trust him. My question is why not put a brake? I understand it's not their responsibility to educate the fans, but wouldn't we prevent a lot of what happens if they told these people to stop? From my point of view Vminkook should bring this up to the fans. It's a snowball that's been growing, and it doesn't seem to be ending anytime soon </3 The fact that they're not distant is a good indication that it does not affect them too much, but it worries me that many shippers are crossing limits. Harassing people like what happened with Tae and model from Paris or Polyc, tattoo artist. Am I insane for thinking so??

Yes. It is bad to put the responsibility of insane cultists or horrible shippers on the members. That's not their Job, not their responsibility and if people LISTENED to what the members SAY, then they've said and done all they should need to do. Why continue to waste their own time, and sacrifice their own mental health, for people who twist their words and call them lairs no matter what. @minggukieology posted a good break down of shipping and shipper mentality earlier today here too that someone what relates

This whole discourse is the epitome of victim blaming. Tae and JK and Jimin have been very clear about their relationships together and what they mean to each other and how they love each other and even how they grew apart and back together, all 3 have addresssed how theyve grown and changed over the years. Tae even HAS addressed it when someone confronted him directly with it. Why are you blaming THEM when people choose not to listen. It's giving "well what were you wearing?" "Are you sure you weren't asking for it?" Energy. It's not THEIR fault when rabid fans decide to harrass someone. You saw you trust them, so do that. And stop placing expectations on them to control shippers who don't actually give a fuck about the members or what they do or say. Because those shippers, who spread hatred? They just call the members liars and will always twist the narrative into whatever story pleases THEM the most. They see the members as characters in a story they want to control, rather than real life human beings who have more important things to do in their lives than address people they don't even Consider fans. Like hang out together with the friends and enjoy their life. And let the haters scream into the void and make themselves miserable. They don't owe anyone anything. And if you think that if Tae and JK and Jimin all held a press conference and said something like telling shippers to stop and that they aren't dating and that jikook are or aren't in love or all 3 have gfs or bfs outside the group or whatever, that it would actually work? You are deluding yourself. They would be called liars again, or forced by the company, or hiding to protect themselves. It wouldn't work. So why give these hateful people their mental vulnerability and energy? Wouldn't it be better to just live their lives the way they want and protect themselves that way and give each other the love THEY know is true?

Everyone who keeps demanding this from the guys has never actually thought through how it would go and is more concerned about THEIR OWN PERSONAL well being in fandom space (which they can currate) rather than the members personal well being and mental health in their own lives. Which I'm sure they do what they do to protect that and live as well as they can at the height of fame they are. You want them to address this because it will make YOU (general you) feel better in your fandom experience and your life, not because it will make vminkook feel better or make their (or the other members) lives easier.

[f1-birb]

it's not necessarily reading twitter or insta comments (i don't use twitter much at all anymore and i've had mclaren blocked on all socials since the ricciardo days when they were allowing their team to get harrassed too lol), but it's just like you can curate your spaces so well and you're still going to get posts recommended to you from these damn algorithms that are like “lando is washed,” “lando is going to get exposed,” and idk it gets old.

even reddit, which used to be a voice of reason when it came to actually discussing races/drivers, you cannot have a single lando thread without half the comments being about lando never winning a race or oscar beating him to the first race win and it's like oh my god. who the fuck cares. ocon got the win over alonso in 2021, do people actually think ocon is a significantly better driver than alonso. carlos got ferrari's only win and the only non-rbr win in 2023, do people really think he's significantly better than most of the grid, including his teammate charles? george is mercedes’ last race winner. do people, especially after last year, truly think he's at a higher level than lewis right now? like wins are great. i'd sacrifice my firstborn for lando to get a race win. if oscar gets one first, that's fine. it doesn't mean lando has failed or is washed up or isn't as talented. (i also feel like half of these people don't even like or care about oscar, they just want to see lando get beat. like theres this sick trend on tumblr, reddit, media in general of wanting to see oscar win first and lando fall in this unbeatable depression that has me like what the everliving fuck is wrong with you, but i also have enough decency to think actual mental health problems should be off-limits as criticisms. theres a difference between saying one driver handles pressure better than another, an actual analysis/criticism, versus wishing to see a driver struggle mentally for entertainment).

and this is nothing against oscar at all. it's pretty apparent lando likes him, the team likes him, and he's a major talent. there's just loud parts of his “fanbase” (again i use this term loosely because half these people dont seem to care as much about oscar as they do seeing lando get “exposed” or whatever the fuck) that lack the ability to praise him without shitting all over lando.

and idk. i have full belief in lando as a driver. but some of these criticisms hit pretty close to home when you follow and support him because he's the driver you find most relatable and suddenly the majority of the criticism isn't about his driving, but his character or personality and how people perceive that.

i also just think this overanalysis of his mistakes while others get this free pass because fans/media always insist on blaming the team or others (won't name names, but i have a feeling based on other of your posts/answers, you know who I'm mostly thinking about) will continue into 2024 and i just don't feel like dealing with it anymore. i'm stuck in a shitty job i'm not really enjoying until at least august, f1 used to be an escape from that, but shitty people have ruined that too. and unfortunately I've been around the media enough that even if i did watch the races on mute so i wouldn't have the shitty sky commentary to annoy me even more, i would still know subconsciously what narratives were being spread and i just don't have the emotional stability to care about this motorsport atm.

fe and indycar? sure. like i cannot tell you how many times my favorite indycar driver did not capitalize on opportunities to win last year, yet this year all of the socials are uplifting and asking for predictions on how many races he will win, not betting that he retires with every most (insert accomplishment here) without a win like f1 does. i used to call those 2 my comfort series but i don't think they provide comfort so much as they're so much less toxic than f1 that i don't have to worry about my favorite drivers being straight up harassed instead of just their driving critiqued.

i'd love to follow lando, and oscar, and the entire team through both the highs and the lows as i have for many years now, but i just don't have the energy in me anymore. it's been feeling like a chore instead of a fun little hobby to watch for a while now, and i thought i would find some enjoyment out of it again at some point, but i just can't anymore. i will definitely be sticking around to read your writing though, just maybe not commentary on race weekends.

anyway this got so very long, i'm so sorry. this isn't an airport and i don't need to announce my departure, i guess i just had a lot of things building up that i needed to get out.

no need to apologise at all, I've always said my asks are open for rants or venting or just needing to let it out

I'm sorry there's not a lot I can say to what you've said because I agree with a hell of a lot of it and fully get where you're coming from

there's no point making yourself sad, upset, angry over it and while I know it'll suck to miss out on the racing since that's what you actually care about, maybe a break sounds like a good idea actually especially if you've got life things too

I'm preeeeettty good at tagging stuff so hopefully that'll help you navigate my blog at least, but since I do post a Lot on race weekends if I post writing it's always tagged "birb writes" and that's a featured tag for easy access - but it's so sweet that you'd stick around for my writing, it means a lot <3

[gubbin-galoshes]

I was doing great this morning until I suddenly hit a wall and was overwhelmed by the crowd and noise, possibly due to volunteering to participate in more crowds and noise tonight, and the panic of having to deal with it juxtaposed with the promise of a Hogmanay bonfire. Right now I want a hot shower, but there's no hot water, so I'll write about how I finished reading I, Robot last night.

I'd picked up this book from the same dumpster table as Stargate from a previous post. This, too, was full of dead bugs and had a crumbling weird-textured jacket and the cover was warped, so it sat on a shelf. I'd tried reading it a few times, but had only got halfway through the first chapter each time before putting it down. It wasn't my time for it, I guess.

Recently I tried again, and breezed through it. This isn't a story about characters or plot: this is a collection of thought experiments about the differences between the way humans think and the way AI views and interacts with the world. It's not necessarily a warning-- in fact, there's a lot of hope --but it's about sacrifice, and what we're willing to acknowledge and give up for happiness. It's about how mistakes make us human.

Today, as an experiment, I took the Laws to heart, specifically the first: Do No Harm. The explanation in the last part of the book included hurting someone's feelings, or hurting someone's ego. As someone who routinely goes crazy from the list of social rules and reminders I've set for myself, to boil it all down to Do No Harm (and to be able to say I did well if I only did no harm) was a relief.

This led me to consider the other rules. Follow Commands and Preserve Yourself. Follow commands is straightforward: it doesn't say predict what someone else needs, it's let someone tell you what they need. As someone who routinely goes crazy trying to help where help was not asked for, this, too, was a relief.

Preserve Yourself (where the first two laws don't interfere) means take care of yourself, your health, your mental state, your space, your peace, where it does not harm anyone and does not prevent you from fulfilling your productive role. As someone who routinely goes crazy destroying myself for the sake of other people, to think of preserving myself in this way was a relief.

It worked. I don't regret anything I said or did except maybe pacing and fidgeting instead of sitting still and writing and I even managed to make other people feel happy after talking to me.

So maybe being a robot isn't so bad. But the more I think about it, the more I believe that, for humans, the laws should be slightly reordered:

Do No Harm

Preserve Yourself

Obey Commands

As in, only fulfill what is asked of you if it will not harm you. But above all, do no harm to others: physically, emotionally, or intellectually.

The hot water has come back. It's time to take a very hot shower and prepare a list of thoughts I'd like to burn and leave behind in 2023.

It's going to be okay.

[general-sleepy]

What do you mean by explicit veto? I do not know much about organ donation, I am curious though. Thanks!

(Sorry, this turned into way more of an essay than I intended).

An explicit veto is "Do not do this. It would hurt me if you did," as opposed to something like "I'd rather you didn't but it's your choice" or "I wouldn't do it myself." The decision for me was about weighing positives and negatives. I decided that the physical risks and sacrifices were outweighed by the satisfaction I would get helping someone. To me, though, the pain that I could cause my family was too much to set aside. I don't let my family's opinion determine every decision I make, but in this case, when I evaluated it as a factor, I came to the conclusion I couldn't go forward. It sucks, but we can't always get everything we want, and I'm coming to peace with my decision.

Non-directed organ donation is donating an organ to a stranger. Topically you go through the nearest transplant hospital. [source] (The source I just cited is a really good place to start). They'll evaluate you, which includes interviews to make sure you're of sound mind and doing it of your own free will (note that just having a mental health diagnosis doesn't automatically rule you out) and a battery of physical tests. These tests are very extensive. You can be ruled out for things that have no effect on your health, but would affect you in surgery, which was the case with me.

You'll work with a social worker and psychologist at the hospital, but you'll also be connected with an independent living donor advocate. This person isn't affiliated with the hospital and is only concerned with your choices. They make it very clear that you can back out at any point without shame, to the moment that they're wheeling you to the operating room.

The most common living organ donation is kidney donation. One kidney can do all the work that you need and probably won't affect your health in any meaningful way. [source] It requires some lifestyle changes: really the only one that you can't play full contact sports like soccer or hockey or work certain physically demanding jobs, like firefighting. It's a very safe surgery, with a mortality rate of 3.1 per 10,000 donors. [source] [extensive] (Though keep in mind that's the average number; your country or local hospital may have different statistics. For example, the hospital I approached has better than average outcomes).

Livers donation is actually partial liver donation. If part of your liver is removed and transplanted into someone in liver failure, both halves will regenerate into full livers that work exactly the same as they did before. [source]This is an advantage over kidney donation. But, the actual surgery is more dangerous. This source says there is an average mortality rate of 1 in 1,000. [source] The hospital I approached, UCSF, gave a mortality rate of 1 in 3,000, though UCSF specifically had never had a live donor die.

Both surgeries have lengthy recovery periods. For both, you'll be able to do basic things for yourself (preparing meals, getting dressed and bathed, using the bathroom), but you won't be able to work most jobs. For kidney donation, you'll be out of work for 2 to 4 weeks, and might not be up to 100% for several months. [source] Liver donation has a longer recovery period, at 6 to 8 weeks out of work. [source] There are programs to cover your wages to a certain amount, however.

There is a program for kidney donation (I haven't gone deep into this, because I did most of my research on liver donation, which doesn't have this program) where you get a certain number of vouchers for yourself and friends and family. Those vouchers put them at the top of the transplant list if they ever need a kidney. [source]

I really do think that people should at least look into living organ donation. You might be more interested in it than you think. Even if you don't choose that path, absolutely make sure that you're registered as a deceased organ donor. Here's a resource for Americans. [source] Feel free to reblog with the sources in your own country. Make sure that your loved ones, officially or unofficially, know that that's what you want to happen.

[random-basil-lover]

"Oh Basil acts so childish i hate him" "Oh Basil is so annoying" "ugh Basil is so scary he's crazy i hate him"

BASIL IS FUCKING TRAUMATISED. GUYS FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, IF HE ACTS CHILDISH (which is something i don't agree with) MAYBE CONSIDER THAT HE IS 16??? WE TEENAGERS ARE CHILDISH AND STUPID ANYWAYS

BASIL HAS SEVERE PTSD AND POSSIBLE BPD, HE POSSIBLY HAS PSYCHOSIS OR ANOTHER MENTAL HEALTH CONDITION THAT MAKES IT HARD FOR HIM TO LIVE AND CONTROL HIMSELF. HE IS DEPRESSED. HE IS HURT. JUST BECAUSE HE CAN HAVE WHAT YOU COULD CONSIDER A "NORMAL LIFE" DOESN'T MEAN THAT THE GUY IS FUCKING SUFFERING.

"But he's a fictional character, why so mad?"

Fictional. characters. are. based. off. of. real. life. Basil's struggles are struggles people have IN REAL LIFE, illnesses PEOPLE HAVE, maybe even Omocat or someone of the team experienced that themselves, who knows.

If you don't understand mental illnesses, don't judge and hate. If you think you understand them but instead you are hating on the "oh, no so romantic and poetic" parts that ruin your perception of mental health being "poetic and cool", you should reflect on yourself.

Some mentally ill people hardly shower. Some mentally ill people don't brush their teeth. Some mentally ill people smell bad. Some mentally ill people live in fear, can't control themselves. It's not their fault. They didn't choose to suffer.

Also, about Basil attacking "Sunny" in 1 day left... Let me make you be in his shoes: You're sixteen, your parents weren't there for you during almost your whole life, you have abandonment issues, the only friend you truly connected with abandoned you out of nowhere after you saw your girl friend dead, had to carry her, you feared of what might happen to your best friend if they find out, and you tried to help him, which takes you to carry and hang the dead body of SOMEONE YOU LOVED, all this at 12, which is extremely traumatic by itself. One of your former friends started bullying you for something you didn't do, but you decided to not tell her you didn't do it to protect your best friend. She calls you a creep, and some other people join to keep calling you hurtful things, they even attack you physically. Your best friend came back after four years, but still wasn't there for you when you were hallucinating and panicking. It's night, and you are going to kill yourself. Your friend arrives. It's frustrating, because your dearest friend is going to leave the next day, and you needed their support so much... So, why the hell is he here? Why is he showing up and then leaving again? Does he even care about you, about what you had to sacrifice for him? You're going to commit suicide, you are in a very vulnerable moment, you are scared, angry at many things, filled with self-hatred, and guilt. You're having/almost having a panic attack. After seeing your friend, these feelings intensify, and you can no longer control yourself with all the things you're feeling at that moment, it's overwhelming, you're not thinking straight. You yell at him because he is going to leave you again, because you are hurt, and, as i said, can't think straight. You start hallucinating, but you think it is real. It is the way your brain has been coping, trying to take the blame away from your dear friend. You want to kill that hallucination, that "something" that did all the bad things (like killing your other friend Mari). You don't understand why is Sunny struggling and in front of you all the time, you want to protect him from the hallucination, you want him to be safe. Once again, you think the hallucination is real. Then, you manage to stab the hallucination in the eye... Only to realise you actually stabbed your dearest friend. You didn't mean to. You wanted to protect him. More guilt. You pass out.

Doesn't that sound like a completely terrfying thing to go through? Just because you haven't suffered it doesn't mean you have to judge and hate on someone, fictional or not. Because if you went through that, i assure you you would not be thinking straight either, and you would've done something similar, or maybe... you would be dead already. Because those are 4 years of psychological torture. Not everyone can go through 4 years of psychological torture.

Thank you.