#c****** fans and empire fans gonna kill me

[engagemythrusters]

Choose violence ask game:

the character everyone gets wrong

which ship fans are the most annoying?

worst part of fanon

you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...

(Sorry when I copied it, the numbers didn't stick to the text)

VIBE These are tasty! thank you for copying the questions fr I hate going back and forth between the sheet and the ask so BLESS you’re a real one for this

Character everyone gets wrong

Like Skywalker. He’s not an uwu twink… he never has been… what the fuck Star Wars are you WATCHING. Like some of you only read the Chanel boots tweet and thought that was the only notable thing from three whole movies of character development.

Oh also Mace Windu. He’s not a scary dictator sort of person—you’re just projecting your anti-Black fantasies onto him.

Ships that are the most annoying?

Codywan. I’m saying it out loud now. The whitewashing… the objectification… the blatant ignoring of Cody as a HUMAN BEING… also Obi-Wan is the next up on the mischaracterised list bc everyone turns him into an UWU baby too. Also codywan fans straight up first anon hate I ever got. I think I deleted them but like. That was the moment I was absolutely D O N E. no thanks. God. Fuck off n leave me alone.

Worst part of fanon?

“Empire was right” and “the Jedi were the bad guys” idiots. Literally what the fuck. Cannot believe people like that exist, but here we are.

Oh also Max Rebo fans who send anon hate for weeks for some RIDICULOUS poll? And they were dead serious about it too. Wild. That was dumb as shit.

Mad/ashamed/horrified I actually like…

Um I don’t think I’m truly upset by anything I enjoy? Like I do love to joke about my Rexwalker enjoyment, but I’m not truly embarrassed by it. Just for the bit. Just so Olly doesn’t get THE SATISFACTION. Otherwise nah I’m pretty fine enjoying what I enjoy. If people have issues with anything I enjoy it’s usually never my preferences that are the problem anyway

🫡 it was nice knowing y’all. I’ll be murdered once this post goes out to the public.

[spopsalt]

C*tr* fans:

me: 1) the part of " all C*tr* did was apologize and she still was inmidiatly forgiven " it's true, even she only apologize to Adora and Entrapta, the others forgive her as nothing happens like. Then when did C*tr* sacrifice her life and her free will to a mind-wipping empire to save the life of her enemy ? wehn only see how she abused Adora also she DID NOT become a better, she just choose it because there was nothing left for her and for guion power. 2) no because i'm not an abusive toxic person as C*tr* who is obssesed with her sister Adora and again i remind that C*tr* did not apologize and/or took resposabilities of her actions because the show says so and C*tr* was not afraid of die because on the portal episode we watched that C*tr* didn't seem to be afraid of dying and nop, i don't have a deep heart down to able to do what C*tr* did because i'm not an abusive toxic person.And finally 3) key word " kids " C*tr* is a kid ? nop, she's a teenager who knew what was doing and still do awfull things to Adora, kill and hurt innocent people and destroy cities and use the terms " kids who are victims of abuse CAN break circle and have a happy ending " is in between because yes it's true that some kids are victims of abuse but we are talking about little kids not a teenager who knows what are they doing and C*tr* did wanted to continue the cicle of abuse so it's her fault for staying in the horde and not go with Adora that if she really loved her she could easy go with Adora to brightmoon but decided to stay in the horde and for what ? " have a happy endingg, and that no one is truly undeserving love " agreed kids who has suffered abuse deserves so much better and a happy ending excetp of C*tr* she deserves worse and deserve to have a punishment or at least call out for all the mess she has done!! " it is such a poweful menssage of the show that i love so much " dude idk what menssage is that you forgive your abuser sibling that murder and hurt people, destroy cities, home and families and still got a happy ending when actually deserves to be on jail or are you going to tell me that Palestines will forget what Isr*el are doing and give them a happy ending too just like in she-ra ?? ( i'm sorry my hate for C*tr* got out of my nerves sorry sorry )

friend, sorry for the long post but this is all my thoughts on this post that really don't make sence but well now i'm gonna try to post glimmadora, tell me what do you think about what this C//A stan says about C*tr* and her rushed redeemtion ?? do you agree with me about what i think or you think i miss something ??

DO NOT HARASS THE PERSON IN THIS POST

Ah, I do love seeing bad takes in the fandom. For the first one, does she really deserve applause when she only left after there was nothing left for her in the horde? She had so many choices to better herself beforehand but chose to do it only after the rebellion was quite literally her only choice. For the second one, I'm pretty sure most catra antis didn't attempt to kill their sister 2 times and abused their sister for years. She literally committed war crimes. She's not some kind person. For the last one, we know abuse victims can break the cycle. All the antis I've seen love Adora and she's an abuse victim people seem to forget that. Also we aren't saying Catra doesn't deserve love?? We just think she shouldn't of date her sister whom she abused for years.

[professor-tammi]

okay here are some Three Hopes thoughts!! spoilers for first 4 chapters of the Lions route, and also some (more minor) Eagles spoilers

- I went into the game expecting to hate Shez (not a big fan of the design) but. they’re not only an actual character, but also quite charming? very positively surprised here :D! I also really enjoy the English VA for both m/f Shez (went with male Shez and female Byleth for my Lions run; will prob do female Shez when I play Eagles)

- having Byleth take on a Lu Bu-esque rival role is an interesting idea, and letting them Actually Speak and be a character is already helping undo some of my Byleth hatred. (only some though. it is still mostly there!!)

- Arval is cute! I like them (? what is gender ?? gender not real) much more than Sothis, which surprises me a bit because I feel like they’re objectively very similar characters. maybe it’s just that Arval’s banter with Shez works out much better than Sothis’ attempted banter with Byleth a wall

- so Arval is obviously somehow Slither-related, but judging from how both Rhea’s and Shez’s eyes glow in a distinctly similar way when they transform, I’m gonna venture a guess and say that Arval is also somehow a dragon. just maybe, like, a different dragon tribe or clan to Sothis’. I dunno.

- I didn’t expect Monica surviving and joining the Eagles this time around to be of much interest to me but. apparently she is very gay for Edelgard and honestly? the one thing Edelgard as a character has always lacked was a cute co-dependent gf. please Koei let Monica be this. I would very much like to have yet another problematic ship! thank you!!

- the Lions plot truly wastes no time getting started -- one moment you’re defeating bandits and the next you’re... executing Rufus and Cornelia!? but I’m not complaining! the political intrigue is fun. I only hope the game still manages to capture the darker sides to Dimitri’s character (which I’m quite positive it will, given they’re foreshadowing it in much the same way 3H did originally, it’ll just happen later on)

- the part at the beginning of Chapter 4 where Faerghus is discussing whether they should aid the Church and risk war with the Empire or not and Felix just interjects with “ok we have two choices. either we aid the church or we submit to imperial rule” was also, excellent. maybe it’s also partly due to the current goings-on in the world and the shockingly poor takes I’ve seen people have about those, but it’s just nice to see Felix instantly lay it out as “yeah you know the Empire is not going to just leave us alone even if we agree to their terms”

- also the Dimilix content in this game already too good and this is just the demo?? yes their meal conversation definitely stands out the most but also little things like Felix’s C support with Shez (which, yes, is about his relationships with the entire childhood friend quartet, but still), and how it’s House Fraldarius that’s immediately singled out in Rufus’ ploy as being closest to Dimitri (”in what cruel world would our noble house take the reins of a boar like you?” ok felix!!), how Felix is at the forefront during Rufus’ execution scene (which... there’s a lot to say about, in general), and how the trailers are hinting at more development of their relationship and!! im just. so excited. (please let me read their B / A supports not knowing is killing me)

- (perhaps it is more accurate to say that the game has a lot of Felix content. and for once I support koei’s character favoritism)

- oh and speaking of Shez supports, Edel-critical people will probably appreciate Edelgard’s C support with Shez, which features Shez calling out her hypocrisy in a very frank way. good content.

- on supports more broadly, only the support levels with little speech bubbles lead to conversations, and it’s been interesting to see the decisions Koei made in regards to who gets how many conversations with who here. I’ve already seen some anger about Felix and Annette only going up to B and only getting one conversation, though in all honesty, I’m not very surprised as I always found their original supports just cute but shallow -- there’s not a ton for the writers to focus on there.

- (otoh I am very much looking forward to whatever the Felix/Dedue support contains, because there’s a 3H relationship that could do with more development!)

- also curious to see which characters will end up joining which houses. Lions are definitely getting Catherine and Gilbert in addition to Rodrigue. Eagles should be getting Hanneman in addition to Manuela and Jeritza (and Monica, also). Deer get Shamir, and presumably also Judith and Cyril (and possibly Holst or something). as for the Wolves, if they’re not exclusive to some secret fourth route, I imagine Constance goes to the Eagles, Balthus to the Deer, and Hapi and Yuri to the Lions. where do the dragons figure in, though? Seteth, Flayn and Rhea would all make the most sense with the Lions, I guess, since they ally with the Church... though that seems like an unusually large cast of playables for them!

- another thing that interests me is the identity of Shez’s mysterious mother, who was apparently a noble living in Leicester... ... the first silly twist I thought of is “what if it’s Patricia, who escaped after the tragedy”, but I’m pretty sure I have zero good reasons to think this? I don’t even know if it works timeline-wise so I’m just documenting it in case I end up, miraculously, being right, for no reason (I just think the idea of her being the mom of 3/4 main characters is cute)

- also I wasn’t tumblering when the new designs where revealed initially but: ponytail felix. ponytail felix. ponytail felix. (Koei you are still not forgiven for taking away Ran, my original high ponytail hyperfixation, but, thank you, for this Felix)

- have to quickly shoutout Annette’s new design though she is SO cute :’) I think the only new Lion design I don’t really like is Sylvain’s. my condolences Sylvain fans. (Ingrid’s bangs are cute sorry!!) (also Dimitri with the tiny ponytail? thank you. my skin is clear my crops are watered)

- for non-Lions: love Edelgard’s design!! it’s almost like. I really like ponytails in character designs. Marianne also looks lovely! annnd I think Caspar’s Three Hopes design is what his post-timeskip design should have been, honestly

- general gameplay thoughts: this is very much a traditional musou, very reminiscent of SW, and I appreciate that bc I miss SW... also I felt AoC had too much of a combat focus to the detriment of the more tactical decision-making that I like having in my musous

- also having permadeath in a musou game is very interesting?? it’ll only come into play in the full release since the game says it’s after Chapter 4 only, but still, intrigued at how this will affect how difficult the game feels :D

[blueeyedgeorgie]

Cancelled-Dream Was Taken

A/N: Surprise bitch. Weren’t we expecting for me to release mcyt fanfics soon? If I didn’t tag my usual @‘s it’s because idk if you’d like to be tagged for mcyt content.

Pronouns: she/her

Word Count: 2.3k+

_________________

"You're so harsh on him!" Her hands sat on the keyboard, staring at the green human that stood on Y/n's computer screen.

She needed to be careful. While this was a heated moment, she couldn't let herself get too loud for multiple reasons. If she got too loud, Dream's stream viewers would be able to tell she was in the next room or they would just receive noise complaints from their neighbors.

"No Y/n! You're too soft on him! He needs to learn that he can't get away with everything. You're setting him up for failure." As the h/c girl listened to her roommate speak, she had to remind herself over and over again; 'This wasn't real.' Dream was mad, not Clay.

This had all been arranged as roleplay. Y/n would be leaving in a few days to go visit some of her family for a reunion, so Wilbur had been the one to think up the brilliant idea of what was playing out now; an argument between Y/n and Dream. The plan was to have Y/n get so upset she didn't log onto the SMP for the next few days, only to come back with a master plan to backstab Dream.

At first, Clay wasn't really on board with the thought of him getting angry at Y/n. They had been together for a little over a year, there wasn't a single moment they had gotten upset with one another. But surprisingly, Y/n had been the one to convince Clay it was a good idea.

The fans knew Dream and Y/n had a close friendship, Dream had always been so protective of her. But when this was going down, they didn't know how to act.

Every time Y/n would glance at her chat, she'd see thousands of comments rising up as new ones appeared. Comment after comment, it looked like the fans were shocked by the way this stream was turning out.

"I'm not setting him up for anything! He's a kid, Dream!" Y/n glanced from the chat,  back at the screen showing her PC game. Standing on her screen was Dream and Tommyinnit, she had accompanied Dream to visit Tommy.

"You're just babying him! 'He's a kid!' Well, he needs to learn to grow up eventually," his voice had been filled with such spite. It felt weird to hear Clay speaking to her like this in such a tone.

For a moment, she stared at the green man before a short scoff escaped her lips. "I can't believe you." With that, Y/n had pressed a few keys, turning her character towards the nether portal a couple of yards away. Before Dream had gotten the chance to speak again, Y/n began to move away.

"Y/n! Come back here!"

She flicked a few buttons, taking a moment to look behind her character to see Dream following. Good, everything was going according to plan. Within the next few minutes, she'd be able to log off and she'd be on vacation for the next few days.

The h/c girl ignored the green man as she stepped through the portal, taking her to Minecraft's version of hell. Almost done, she just needed to find a good spot to stop as she listened to Dream continue to speak.

"You can't keep ignoring me! You know I'm right in this. You know you can't keep defending Tommy. You know Tommy is driving a wedge between us-"

Perfect. Y/n had stopped just on the edge of a bridge, molten lava sat feet below them. If she fell, she'd surely die. "No."

"No?" Dream was a bit surprised to hear Y/n cut him off, but he stayed silent as he was prepared to listen to what she had to say.

"No. No more. I don't wanna hear you blame Tommy for us breaking apart. I want you to listen to me. You've been acting like much more of a dick than usual and I hate it. I despise it. You've changed for the worst because you think you can step on everyone. At this point, everyone fears to tell you the truth-except me. I'll be a hundred percent honest with you, you've been so egotistical, it's really pissed me off. This is your fault, Dream. Not Tommy's. You exiled a child for pulling a prank on a vacation house! Not even George's real house!"

"But-"

"Shut the fuck up. I'm done, but I don't wanna hear you bullshit me. So shut the fuck up."

A moment of silence passed between them as Y/n stared at her screen. Just a few more steps.

And within seconds, Dream had pulled out his netherite sword. With one hit, she was falling back into lava. Y/n glanced at her chat, a look of shock on her face as she read over what a few comments said. A moment of silent tension had passed before Y/n had finally spoken up, removing her from the voice chat she was in.

"Alright guys, I guess that's enough for the day. I'll see you all... later." With that, she had clicked a few buttons, raiding Dream's live-stream as she ended hers.

For the next 20 to 30 minutes, Y/n knew Clay would be busy streaming. So she had decided to take a bit of time to wind down and think to herself.

Get a glass of water.

'Are the fans harassing him in his twitch chat?'

Sit down on the living room couch.

'The SMP fans were always so protective of me.'

Pet Patches.

'Was I too much when I snapped at him?'

It didn't seem like 30 minutes had passed when Clay had walked out of his streaming room, only to find Y/n on the couch with Patches in her lap. "Hey, N/n." "Oh, your stream is already over?" Y/n smiled, pulling herself out of her thoughts as she scoot over, giving Clay room to take a seat right by her.

"Yeah, did you lose track of time or something?"

"I must've. How did the chat react after I 'died'?" She smiled up at her boyfriend as he wrapped an arm over her shoulders, pulling her closer into his embrace.

"Everyone was filled with joy that you died."-Y/n playfully swatted at him. "Okay, okay! I got a few chat messages of people bashing me for it, but it's fine."

"Well, it's a good thing the chat wasn't completely littered with hate. How was it after my raid?"

"Honestly, not that bad as you expect. Like I said, just a few comments. Nothing bad, I just ignored it." Clay placed a hand on Patches's head, gently scratching her, followed by the animal beginning to purr.

"Good to hear, anyways... I'm not ready to pack. Do you think we can procrastinate?" The h/c girl let out a huff leaning against her boyfriend. "How?"

"I was thinking a bit of movie binging, cuddling, and ordering dinner?" A cheeky smile spread on her face as she spoke.

"It's like you read my mind."

The couple had made it through three movies, by now it was later at night. The sun had set and they had already door dashed some food. By now they were in the middle of watching 'The Empire Strikes Back.'

'I love you.' 'I know.'

The iconic moment between Hans and Leia had been interrupted by the sound of Clay's phone buzzing. "Why is George calling?"

"What?" Y/n was a bit curious herself. Considering the timezones, George should be asleep right now. Pausing the TV, she turned her attention to her boyfriend's phone.

"Hey Clay."

"What's up, George? Isn't it like early in the morning for you?" Clay raised a brow, moving his phone so Y/n would be able to see George as well.

"Yeah, I had to stay up to fix a YouTube video I need to get out today. I was about to go to bed and I checked Twitter-"

"Oh no." Clay made a short joke, only to be cut off by his friend.

"I don't know if it's trending for you in America, but you might as well look."

"What's going on?" He swiped up, taking him to his home screen so he could click on the little blue bird app. Y/n had grabbed her phone from the coffee table, opening up the app as well. "#Cancel Dream... #Y/n... #Dream SMP"

"Is... is Clay getting canceled for killing me in Minecraft?" Y/n scrolled through the tweets involving the hashtag 'Y/n.' She could see plenty of people defending her, but making it much bigger of a problem than it actually was.

"Oh, hey Y/n. But yeah, he is." George chuckled awkwardly, scrolling through his Twitter app as well.

"This is so fucking stupid."

"It really is. So we might as well get this cleared up with the fans as soon as possible. Do you want me to tweet something, or do you want to?" Y/n looked up at her boyfriend, it looked like he was thinking.

"Yeah, I'll tweet it. Don't worry about this, Y/n."

"Alright, whatever you say," she replied, pulling a blanket over her as she waited for Clay to finish typing his response.

"Here's what I'm gonna say: 'I can't believe you guys actually think me and @(y/n) are in an actual fight in real life. We have been good friends since forever, the fight was only roleplay. I love that you guys are so protective of Y/n, but no one's actually upset.' How's that sound?"

"I think that's good," George hummed softly.

"Yeah, I doubt you'll stay 'canceled' once you've explained to them it was all part of the SMP lore." The h/c girl smiled up at her boyfriend with a small nod.

"Alright, I'm gonna post it. George, I think you should go to bed because you're half asleep already."

Y/n turned, looking at her boyfriend's iPhone. "Go to sleep, Gogy!"

"Alright, alright... I'll talk to you guys later." The call had ended with Clay and Y/n saying goodbye to their friend while George simply yawned to them as a response.

As soon as the call was over, Clay looked at the response to his tweet. It didn't seem to be going too well. There had been a few fans who understood what was going on and responded with a paragraph as an apology for the misunderstanding. But most replies had been telling Clay he was bullshitting the fans or that he wasn't being honest.

"I'm sorry, Clay," his girlfriend had huffed as she read through the responses to his tweet.

"Honestly I'm just a bit pissed off. Literally, any time someone tries to 'cancel' me, it's over something stupid. I'm not a bad guy, it just feels like some people just don't want to see me succeed." Clay had excused himself to grab a glass of water from the kitchen.

It hurt Y/n to hear how upset her boyfriend was. He never got too upset over things, but seemed to take a small toll on him. "Hold on. Let me say something." The h/c girl couldn't be asked to post multiple tweets of her response to hate sent towards Clay over the internet. So what was better than a short video that could be posted to the blue bird app?

"Um, hey guys. I'd just like to make this quick. Stop sending hate towards Dream. The fight was roleplay and nothing more. I'm gonna be busy for the next couple of days so Wilbur thought of a good idea to help build SMP lore with me and Dream and we both agreed to the argument. Now stop sending the green man hate, or I'll commit war crimes or something-"

Y/n had been interrupted by the sound of Clay letting out a small giggle. "What? What did I say?"

"Nothing, just keep going with your video."

"Whatever, I'm cool. No matter what Dream says. Anyways, I'll speak to you all later." Y/n had hit the red button again, ending her video. Within seconds, the video had been uploaded to her Twitter account.

Placing her phone back down on the table, Y/n approached her boyfriend, wrapping her arms around his torso. "I'm really sorry about the hate, Clay. I love you."

"Don't apologize for something you can't control. I love you more." The brunette held his partner close, accepting her hug. Y/n always loved his hugs, she always felt so safe in his embrace.

The rest of the night had been spent with more cuddling and more Star Wars movies. Hours had passed before Y/n had even thought about the Twitter situation again. But for some reason, she had decided to look at the app again tonight.

It was 2 in the morning by now, Clay was half asleep. His head laid in the h/c girl's lap as she brushed a hand through his hair, her free hand opening up her Twitter app once again.

It had been a bit of a surprise to see a couple of trending hashtags had changed so quickly. What was trending now was #Dream, #Y/n,#(ship name), and #Dream's Laugh. This had to be about Y/n's short clip she posted. And by the looks of it, people had stopped acting so harsh towards Clay. But instead, they had decided to focus on the fact Dream and Y/n were hanging out together. Not to mention the fact Dream and let out a stupid little giggle because of Y/n. People had been apologizing to him through Twitter for being so hard on him.

"Babe."

"Hm?" Clay mumbled, not bothering to open his eyes.

"Pretty much everyone is apologizing to you over Twitter for being hardasses."

"Hm, that's good to hear."

"You're really tired, huh?" Y/n paused her scrolling to look down at her boyfriend.

"Yeah," He continued to mumble, followed by a short yawn.

"Alright, time for bed, babe." Y/n smiled to herself, beginning to carefully move away from Clay. "I can pack tomorrow and we can laugh over the stupid bird app tomorrow after you've gotten a good amount of sleep."

"I still can't believe Twitter tried canceling me over roleplay."

"I can't believe you got uncancelled by shippers."

Taglist: @notphilosopherstudentblog

[vyeoh]

this is your chance: wax poetic about an Empires or DSMP character of your choice to a fan who is new to both. Explain why I should love them. I need guidance in this new and meme-populated land.

okok this is a lot of pressure haha. Spoilers for EmpiresSMP and DreamSMP below, obviously. I wrote a lot so prepare yourself, anon

I watch a lot of empires POVs but the ones I most anticipate every week are Scott and Sausage.

c!Scott (I'll call him Smajor for the sake of simplicity) starts off the series chilling, not really getting involved with the rest of the server, and staying aggressively neutral. After all, he's an elf. He has lived far longer than most of the other rulers already, and will most likely outlive them for many years. So, the best thing is to stick to his mountains and not get invested in the dealings of mortal affairs, maybe sometimes causing problems on purpose and dipping because what's life without a little spice right.

But then, this demon comes to the server, Xornoth. He's going around causing havoc and wants to send the world into an eternal winter, but he doesn't bother the kingdom of Rivendell much so Smajor stays tentatively cautious but ultimately unbothered. But then, the puzzle pieces start falling together. The first thing that the audience noticed was was Xornoth sounded like Smajor, but we mostly thought that this was just due to cc!Scott voicing both of them and there was nothing more to it. However, then, the people the demon starts possessing start chanting in elvish. The demon hates mortals, and the elves are conveniently one of the two confirmed not fully mortal races in Empires.

This culminates when Smajor stumbles across a cave that contains the backstory of the patron god of Rivendell, Aeor. Basically, there's two opposing forces, Aeor and Exor, and both have a champion. In a previous life, those champions were two brothers, where Aeor eventually prevailed and banished Exor. In this life though, the champions are - you guessed it - Smajor, and the demon Xornoth.

So now Smajor is like. Well fuck. It's my literal god-given destiny to be responsible for defeating this demon who is technically my brother, and if I fail the server gets plunged into an eternal winter. And I have no fucking clue what is happening because I've just been here on this mountain actively trying to stay out of the issues outside my kingdom. We watch him panic and teeter on the verge of spiraling for an entire episode, and when the followers of Xornoth go to the End to kill the dragon, releasing Xornoth's full powers, he fails to stop him. Smajor is a character who was used to being the smart one, the prepared one, the one who has the least deaths on the server. But he's also a character who runs away from his problems and ignores them. Before and during the dragon fight, we hear the desperation in his voice, as he's thrown into a situation he is wholly unprepared for, and it's bigger than him going to the Cod Empire to kill their king, or assisting in other people's plans to kill the codfather. He can't run from this. cc!Scott plays this scene so well as well, as I've said before, one of the best parts of Scott's acting is how he's never super dramatic, but he's so effective in the little things like inflection to make you feel, viscerally, the panic and dread.

So after the dragon fight, Smajor realizes, I can't do this on my own. I've tried and failed. So he gets allies. We watch him, someone who has so strongly been an isolationist, learn the benefits of allies and watch him learn to trust others and watch him learn how to get that trust in return.

My favorite thing about Smajor's characterization is that he's an incompetent protagonist, but not in the way of the "plucky young adventurer". He's capable skill-wise, and fairly jaded and very pessimistic. However, his issue is that up until recently, he did not care about the rest of the server at all, and by the time he learned to, it was way too late.

Also, in 3rd Life, cc!Scott and cc!Jimmy were canonically married and they reference it sometimes in Empires. Like, Scott goes over to the Cod Empire every so often both in and out of character to kill and/or flirt with Jimmy, the ruler of the Cod Empire, which may develop as a secondary plot into the future who knows. So ty Scott for giving the gays what they want o7

Now onto Sausage: his is a story of Icarus, his hubris and ambition being his downfall. He's one of the two followers of Xornoth, who promised him endless power in exchange for his servitude. He started the series being eccentric, but not outright unhinged, but slowly gets more and more extreme as the series progresses, as he gets brought more and more to Xornoth's side.

One of the best parts of Sausage's character, in my opinion, is how his gradual corruption affects the people around him. Initially, he got into a conflict with the Cod Empire and was allied with two other people in the Witherrose alliance. They were allies, but also close friends. The fandom liked to joke that the three had sibling energy, and I'm pretty sure the ccs played to that even more lol.

It was painful to watch the other two members, Gem and fWhip, watch Sausage get corrupted right in front of them, and see them desperately clinging on to this old idea of Sausage in their head because if they faced the truth, it would mean that their friend was gone. Eventually, they do finally cut him out of the alliance, leading him to fully commit to the side of the demon. Sausage felt very clearly betrayed by this, and declared the remaining two Witherrose alliance members to be enemies.

He gets more and more possessed, and we even see the other Empires, his enemies even, slowly realize that something is very wrong with the ruler of Mythland. He starts doing more and more evil things, like killing people more, making sacrifices to the demon, and eventually helping to kill the dragon to free Xornoth. So things are good for Sausage, for a bit. He won, and is more powerful than ever. Then he finds out: he's going to die. Xornoth's possession is slowly killing his soul, and eventually, his body going to be fully taken over and he himself is going to be trapped in the spirit realm. So how do you react to this? Over the next few episodes, we watch Sausage struggle between "the demon is literally killing me" and "the demon has given me so much, and I love it", all while Xornoth takes over more and more of him. We hear him exclaim that "don't worry!! I'm still about 15% there!" while trying to downplay every time Xornoth completely takes over his body. We watch him willingly oppose anyone who is trying to end the thing that is killing him.

My favorite thing about Sausage is that he is undoubtedly evil and proud of it, but he's also undoubtedly human. If you like to watch evil characters go absolutely feral, he's the guy for you. He makes the deal with Xornoth in the beginning, knowing and fully embracing the evilness of the demon, but at the same time he knows what he's doing is detrimental to both himself and everyone around him, but he's gotten in way too deep at this point, and to be fair the demon has held up its end fo the bargain, right?

Also, I would be damned if I don't talk about cc!Sausage's editing. Every one of his videos is like a movie. The way he does camera angles and uses music is so skillful- every lore scene feels like something out of a high fantasy action saga (think: LotR). Every big lore event I always wait in anticipation for Sausage's ep because his editing truly takes lore to another level.

I'm just generally very excited to see where this series goes. Empires is such a good mix of talented builders and good lore. Part of the reason why the series is so immersive for me, beyond any other lore smp, is that they have the settings to back it up. There is a certain charm to the DreamSMP's objectively terrible builds (with a few exceptions) but in Empires, the settings help sell the plot so much.

Another part of why I love EmpiresSMP is how much the ccs are involved with the fan community. I'm sure you've seen the memes about Scott being on tumblr, and Sausage regularly goes through the EmpiresSMP fanart tag on Twitter and likes art, even ones not related to Mythland. Most of the ccs, in fact, have brought up tumblr content on stream at some point or another. Like, several ccs have said that they read tumblr lore theories and hcs and stuff and sometimes take inspiration from them. Fun fact: Rivendell's church was inspired by my pinned drawing; confirmed by Scott Smajor himself. It's just such a good cycle of ccs and fans being excited about each other.

As for DreamSMP, I'm gonna be honest here, the only person I really am invested in in Technoblade. I started watching when he joined the server, and he's the only person whose lore I keep up to date with.

Techno's fun to watch because he's like the Deadpool of DreamSMP. Virtually unkillable, very skilled and scary, but consistently cracks jokes and breaks the 4th wall during plot. His POV is just fun. Like, he does wild plans and gives speeches and some of the stuff that happens to him should be called deus ex machine if it wasn't for the fact that Technoblade is the one who's doing it, and all the stuff is grounded in the fact that cc!Techno is just that good at the game.

However, the fact that he rarely takes anything seriously makes the few times Techno is 100% serious so much more impactful. His whole character has a basis in being perceived as inhuman and being treated as such, and therefore in return trying to hide his humanity. So, when he shows that humanity, whether that's fear, anger, or genuine love for his friends, it really makes you go "oh shit."

Techno's often said not to have character development, but I'd argue that while he remains steadfast in his moral code, he develops leaps and bounds as a person. Like, at the beginning, he's brought onto the server to help Wilbur and Tommy overthrow a government; them knowing he's 1) an anarchist and 2) very very powerful. His character was more of a plot device at that point and was treated as such in the canon. Wilbur and Tommy straight-up lie to him about their plans to establish another government after they overthrow the current one, while he was led on to believe that they were abolishing all governments in the area. But he isn't a plot device. He's a person, as much as he only shows the terrifying, blood god side of himself.

After the establishment of New Lmanburg (the new government its a long story), his friend Phil joins. And for the first time, we see him be fully human with someone and we see someone treat him like a human. Like, we saw glimpses before, with Wilbur and Tommy in Pogtopia, but Phil is the first person we noticeably see he trusts 100%. Then Doomsday happens, and Techno essentially retires to the tundra. During this time, we see Techno learn to be more human, first with Ranboo, then Niki when he establishes the Syndicate. In fact, the two of them, along with Phil, canonically throw him a birthday party, which is a far cry from his treatment in Pogtopia.

Techno's development is one of a god learning to be human, and I just think he <3

[justalads]

was l’manburg (and c!wilbur) xenophobic?

xenophobia: fear and hatred of strangers or foreigners or of anything that is strange or foreign

short answer: not really? it depends on a few things.

   (all c! and /rp unless specified)

   we’re bringing out the geopolitical roleplay analysis today!

   before i get into the xenophobia discussion, actually, i want to go down a bit of a side track: the take that the people of l’manburg were colonizers. i don’t think it’s a lot of people who say this, but whenever people list “colonizer” as something that wilbur is, it always confuses me a little, as someone who watched the majority of season one live. there are two definitions for “colonizer”:

   (note: i’m going to be using dictionary definitions for most of these. this is purely in order to give the benefit of the doubt to people that use these words wrong. the definition of these terms that people generally accept often is slightly different, and holds more implications.)

1: a country that sends settlers to a place and establishes political control over it

2. a plant or animal that establishes itself in an area

   so, to be fair, the second definition does fit l’manburg. because it fits everyone on the server. everyone showed up and established themselves in the area. but if people are using that definition, why are we calling exclusively wilbur a colonizer and nobody else? why not the people who took land for their houses, when that was considered completely fine by everyone else? wouldn’t that make dream the biggest colonizer of them all?    the definition that people seem to be implying is more of a “moved into an area and took political control over it.” the question would then be: was the land of l’manburg previously inhabited? was there anything there before l’manburg? because “colonizing” something in the negative sense usually means there was already someone there. the people saying this are using it in the negative sense, because if they were not why would they use it at all and specifically to wilbur?

   it could be argued that the land was “dream’s” land, because it was his server, but then that calls into question his ownership over it at all, and whether or not it was legitimate. if dream “owns” the land of the smp, does he own the entire server? if someone goes out a million blocks, is that still “his” land? and why is it his? what gives him a right to it?

   it could also be argued that the land everywhere belonged to the server, as in everyone had equal claim to it all. however, nobody really had a problem in the past with anyone going “this is my house” or “this is my land”. in fact, the land that became l’manburg was kind of wilbur’s house (if you go back to the hot dog van stream, he says that he built it and he “lives” there.) nobody was there before him. it was his own space that he picked out of all the land. nobody on the server had any sort of previous attachment to the land, and there was nothing important there that everyone needed. the land was free. this sort of thing doesn’t happen very often in real life, because populations are usually already living in places that get colonized. this is not true for minecraft. another definition of colonization is this:

   “colonization, or colonisation refers to large-scale population movements where the migrants maintain strong links with their or their ancestors' former country, gaining significant privileges over other inhabitants of the territory by such links.”    basically, you can’t “colonize” your own land. l’manburg didn’t have any sort of real privilege over the other people on the server (they tried to enforce the rules but because they were physically weaker they were disregarded). while the word colonizer can apply in one definition to everyone, it is then kind of weird to use it just for wilbur, because it implies that he fits the other definition when he does not. the misuse of this word has become prevalent again, with fans on both sides of the las nevadas/snowchester outpost calling the other side colonizers. both of these accusations are incorrect.    so then, why did wilbur disallow americans from going into his country? why did he establish that rule, and doesn’t it show him taking “political control” over an area and denying others equal rights? doesn’t that paint him as a little iffy? does the “no americans” rule make him xenophobic?

   again, not really? it’s sort of complicated.

   the circumstances under which l’manburg was created are roughly outlined at about 1:47:23 in tommy’s vod “ TommyInnit & WilburSoot discuss their Empire Plans in Dream's Server.”

   (bold is wilbur, italics are tommy)

   “have you noticed something about the issue last time? when we were trying to just, you know, trying to get blaze rods and stuff. do you know what the issue was?”

   “what was the issue?”

   “right, so think of all the people that were good to us.”

   “tubbo.”

   “eret. fundy. tubbo, right? what do they all have in common?”

   “they’re all weak. weaker than us.”

   “they’re all european, tommy. i’m thinking we build a wall to keep out the americans.”

   “yeah?”

   “we’re gonna build a wall, on the server, and the americans are gonna pay for it. and we’re gonna keep them out of our land. because they— ruin bits.” (laughs)

   “cause they ruin bits?”

   “no, no, no, they just, we need to get rid of them. we need to keep them out.”

   “okay.”

   “so i’m thinking we build this wall, right. we get fundy involved— well okay, first thing we do, we rob the americans for materials to build the wall.”

   “if we do that, the second we do that, they’re gonna stab us and put us in jail and claim that they’ve won again. they’ve won the war.”

   “look, they can keep doing that, over and over again— the wall’s getting built. so we build this wall, right? and then what we can do in this wall?”

   “what?”

   “it’s our territory. we can make as many drugs as we want. the police have no jurisdiction on us there.”

   “okay.”

   ——

   “so tomorrow, we’re gonna build a drug empire?”

   “well— no, we’re just gonna make a country? and then the drugs will be legal in the country.”

   “how do you know that sapnap’s not gonna… i don’t know. you know what they’re like, man, how do we know they’re not gonna… make it a war?”

   “the thing is, right. how i see it is they can declare war, they can do whatever they want, but like. if we just ignore them and don’t acknowledge it, we win. we can’t lose.”

   “yeah, but they’ll just kill us. because that is what happened last time.”

   “we just don’t acknowledge them. ignore them.”

   “yeah, but there’s only so much ignoring you can do when— yeah, alright, alright.”

   “and then we win. we can’t lose, possibly.”

   “we make them pay, for what they’ve done wrong.”

   so the goal is to… make drugs. because drugs are against the law of the server, and they’re going to get the freedom to do drugs by making their own country, where the police can’t get them. they want to keep the americans out because as wilbur said, the europeans of the server were good to them. they keep talking about how the americans might hurt them. experiences with the americans of the server has left these two with a bias against them.

   the plans to steal materials for the wall are a parallel to the american border wall, maybe less of a parallel and more of a reference/joke since many of these words were never acted upon and the circumstances for these two things are different in an important way. that’s why legitimate comparisons of the american border wall and a roleplay between americans and europeans are not great: it disrespectfully equates two situations. wilbur and tommy joke about the wall throughout the first couple of streams. the aversion to americans that they have is sort of unearned for what they have done to the europeans at this point in time.

   the thing with drawing parallels between l’manburg and real life situations is that we have to take into consideration the power dynamics of the server. dream, sapnap and punz had a lot of power at this point simply because they had a lot of tools and armor. l’manburg had pretty much nothing. so why is the country created? one, to escape a law that they deem unnecessary, and to avoid being put in jail. two, because they have a negative view of the americans, and they want a place where they won’t be hurt by them. tommy says the thing about revenge, but nobody ever acts on it. it’s about safety.

   since the prejudice is there, i would say their words here alone could be considered xenophobic? i’m unsure, because it would be more of the “fear” part of the definition than the “hatred” part. the americans did do things to tommy and wilbur. their beliefs are not entirely unfounded. and then, of course, there’s the fact that once they begin to build the nation, the dynamic shifts entirely.

   like i said before, the americans hold most of the power in the situation. once the action starts and the americans begin to poke at the new country, their actions are harming the people there, therefore solidifying in wilbur and tommy’s minds that the americans want to hurt them. a story of “americans hurt people and the people they hurt want to get away from them” does not generally cast the people who want freedom as xenophobic.

   the americans do engage in acts of tyranny on the people of l’manburg. cruel treatment of citizens and no citizen input in the laws of the land fall under that definition. so at this point, we have people who are being harmed by their government. the refusal of independence and the unjust treatment define the americans as oppressors.

   oppression: prolonged cruel or unjust treatment or control

   when in history, we see those who were oppressed by americans (or anyone for that matter! the sides of american and european do not really matter here, the point is the conflict and relationship between the groups) we see their dislike and fear of the other group as justified, not xenophobic. when people and systems in real life are xenophobic, i feel as if the fear is more of a hatred and the basis for the hostility is misguided. those prejudices are also held with a sense of superiority over those they deem “lesser”, not fear of them (although fear can be a motivator for actions). the xenophobia is often held up by systemic power differences.

   if wilbur’s belief that the americans would hurt them was misguided, the americans should have done something to show them that. wilbur clearly expressed to the americans that he thought they were tyrannical and cruel, and they waged war upon him and his people, when they were pretty much defenseless. so then my question is what’s the point of calling them xenophobic, when their enemies were their oppressors?

   it’s like calling him a colonizer: sure, it’s true in a sense, but the way people use it is misleading, and it’s a heavy word thrown at a delicate situation. its untruth or exaggerated truth makes it slanderous rather than genuine and critical analysis. revolution is produced by injustice, whether real or imagined. it is hard for revolutions with imagined injustices to be successful, as the cause is not appealing. the injustice became even more real once the people of l’manburg expressed the desire to be independent, and were further harmed.

   making comparisons to real life things can be useful, but we should also be careful with how we do it. xenophobia and colonization are things that dramatically impact the lives of those oppressed, and while it’s not exactly directly harmful to those people to say something kind of stupid about a minecraft roleplay (this isn’t twitter, this isn’t something to be “cancelled” over in the slightest and i’m not trying to do that, just talking politics) it does show that people either misinterpret or want to shift the narrative of a political situation. basically, it doesn’t really mean anything, but if someone’s going to call c!wilbur xenophobic, they should think for a minute about why he had that prejudice.

   lastly, the words “tyranny” and “dictator” are also extremely misused. people who want to do political analysis should know what the words actually mean.

~ Lad 2

[undergrounddweller89]

NOTE : THIS IS A SPIES IN DISGUISE AU, WALTER IS THE CRIMINAL MASTER MIND AND KILLIAN IS THE SCIENTIST

THIS DEFINITELY CONTAINS SEXY TIMES

Not well written though probably and I tend to rarely go through my work to look for mistakes.

Despite Killian being kidnapped and handcuffed EVERY THING IS CONSENSUAL... Tristan is crazy obsessed with Beckett so he's very happy.

Now you've had your warning you read this instead of scrolling past that's on you, lemon is a tag used for stuff like this but if you feel like there are other tags I need to use please do tell me!)

The bag was stuffy, head phones covered his ears, they'd knocked off his glasses in their struggle to capture him, he could barely see without them.

Now his hands were cuffed behind his back, a hand on each upper arm, honestly Tristan was terrified, the car ride seemed a life time, though realistically it was only ten to fifteen minutes long.

He'd pleaded saying he was a no body just a scientist the agency threw in the corner and that no one ever took him seriously.

He was hunched, trying to tuck his head into his shoulders, so this was how he was going to die.

He felt every bump of the car and turn, trying to map out where he was going but he didn't recognise this route, usually he rode every where on his bicycle, deep blue with a silver bell and a basket on the front to pick up dinner on his way home...

Home where he could research the Criminal Master mind Walter Beckett ...to a near unhealthy obsession...alright it was unhealthy when you imagined him pushing you back against the table parting your thighs, fucking you and making you look at him by holding your head with his clawed hand....

Fuck was he going to die thinking about Walter, a man who didn't even known he existed...well he had no one, nothing living to care about...he might as well think of someone who made him happy even if only in his fantasies before he died right.

He was pulled from the car where he tried kicking at his handlers, Tristan didn't get very far though as one of them punch his gut winding him, he was wheezing as he was taken out of the vehicle.

"You know he's gonna kill you for that right."

The first handler smacked the second on the back of the head

"Only if this limp dick tells him, he's too much of pussy to squeal."

"I wouldn't be so sure of that, but Im not covering your ass."

He was dragged through the facility, Tristan refused to make it easy to carry him and went limp.

Both handlers groaned, fuck, great a difficult one, well the first wasn't going to risk hurting him into compliance and the second knew he was on thin ice, if that punch had bruised him their boss was literally going to kill him.

Other workers watched as they went by, another two carried Tristans legs who now tried to struggle again, what the hell was going on!

He was sat in a chair with ease, after all their boss was right there, the workers didn't dare handle him as if he were anything less than a handle with care package with fragile taped all over him.

"Well are you going to take that off him, it's a little hard for dramatic entrances when he can't even see me."

"Yes sir, right away."

The bag was pulled off swiftly with the headphones clattering to the floor.

Tristan squinted, everyone looked like blurs, he could see faces only as different coloured splodges, his hair sticking up in different angles, shoulders aching now, he still sat up right, heart racing

"Where are his glasses?"

Tristan turned to where he heard the man speak, it was cold, commanded respect...familiar but no it couldn't be...

"Sebastian, where are his glasses?"

"I ah, James you see knocked them off in the struggle and-"

A metal arm, supporting four claw digits at it's end clasped his face

"What did I tell you about people with glasses, remove them, keep them what Sebastian."

He had brought the man to his knees holding so tightly Sebastian could feel his skull on the verge of cracking, he let out a cry as he managed to finish the sentence

"Safe!"

"Oh good you can listen to orders, now James..."

He'd let go of Sebastian and beckoned over his other crew member, Tristan knew this voice but it couldn't be him, he must still be disorientated.

"James, what have I told you about harming what belongs to me."

He said softly, curling his his claws around James's tie, Sebastian stepped back, well he had warned his coworker and with a snap and flick of his wrist the tie had been pulled so hard and tight the man's neck had been snapped.

"He had trouble following orders, first few times is understandable, you're settling into this new life but after five years it should not be that hard."

Tristan wished he'd had his glasses because if this was Walter Beckett he would have just witnessed one of Becketts trade mark moves and yes maybe would have gushed like a fan boy.

He was going to pretend it was him until he could see at the least and imagine he was kidnapped by Thee Walter Beckett.

He listened to him calling in clean up crew and for someone to bring up the glasses, his shape coming in closer and closer, it had to be him, the silver blurred limb was on his left, the hair colour.

"Awww poor baby..."

The younger man cooed.

Tristan tried very hard not to lean into his touch when his hair was stroke back and felt the Claws against his scalp

"Don't worry now, my useless men have been dealt with, come on now look up at me."

He didn't exactly give Tristan a choice as he place a claw under his chin

"See, now Mr Mcford I know I have my fans, the ones who do their fanart, their fictions whatever you will, I keep an eye on anyone who searches my name out of curiosity..."

He tapped his nose

"You Mcford like clock work will watch videos that have only the briefest flash of me, pour over articles, fictions..."

He smirked tracing one long metal claw along his jaw

"Reader x Walter Beckett, but you got tired of them, skinny little me always being pinned, submissive, no, no you wrote your own, named yourself Killian, nice name by the way, where I owned you, laid you back and made sure you knew who you belonged to."

Tristan was red, he was so fucking red and wanted the bag back on his head

"But Im not here to embarrass you, you're actually a good writer and it was the first one I ever enjoyed myself to."

Tristan wanted to implode, die right there, hearing Beckett had fucking masturbated to his little story, he let out a whine then hung his head, trying to hide how much that effected him.

The crew came up and pulled the body from the room and handed Walter the item he'd requested

"Face me now, unless you prefer being half blind."

Beckett held his face with his human hand, finger tip tracing a cheek bone, my they were sharp weren't they, what a pretty scientist.

Placing the glasses on, small lights flickered then settled.

"They read your eyes and the lenses adjust to the prescription you need."

Walter explained now casually sitting on Mcford's lap, an arm around the back of his neck.

"I'll cut to the chase, as I said we check everyone who even so much as types my name out of curiosity and when I found out you were working for the agency that has reaaaally caused a lot of problems in my life I researched you."

Tristan was staring, no way did Walter not feel the protruding problem down below, you would literally have to be either dead or have no feeling in your body to not notice that, he was still, he listened to him, was he having a wet dream, it had to be a dream right?

"Besides my uh Internet history...what...what did you find out."

"Oh you know, that you're an under appreciated scientist who came up with designs so dangerous they had to lock them away...and I may have slightly stolen them, now while I could personally and am the only qualified person here to build such delicious technology...."

He slipped his hand under Tristans lab coat, slowly rubbing his palm against his chest and smirking at the shakey breath and the way Tristan adjusted his hips, oh he could certainly feel that reaction

"I have an evil empire to run...I need you Tristan, I want you..."

He leaned in closer, lips nearly at his.

Mcford whined, fuck he was close Walter hadn't even done anything but the raised brow and smirk on Becketts face told him he could feel him twitch and gasped as the hand that'd been on his chest traveled down a finger tip teasing the head of his cock through his pants.

"How do you feel about working for me Tristan, build your machines and what ever else comes to mind, I need someone as competent as myself..."

Walter kneaded him slowly, to the point the slow pace was painful, his mouth was open and another ragged breath left him, this had to be a wet dream a really, vivid wet dream, please don't let his alarm go off...he pressed against his neck, forehead on his shoulder as Walter stroked the back of his neck with metal Claws, cool against his flesh.

Even if he was awake, of course his answer was yes....

"We could even build something together, I'm sure you'd just love to see me work..."

Beckett leered.

Walter was so warm, he was here, touching him, fucking touching him, dragging it out and making him nearly beg and he loved it.

"Yes..."

Tristan panted, lifting his hips trying to get more friction, he still had his handcuffs on he couldn't reach out and touch the man he wanted, his wrists struggling instinctively to part.

"Look at me and say it, Tristan."

That purr went through Mcford's entire being, lifting his head whimpering, biting his lip, he loved the tease, feeling so close to the edge and having Walter deny him...he begged to some god out there that Walter would finish it at least, it was so intense, he knew his clothes were stained with precum, Beckett seemed to enjoy reminding him he knew it was there by playfully tapping a finger over the tip of his cock where the damp patch was.

"Yes...I'll work for you....I have mmmphn wanted to since I ahh first saw you... Oh my god..."

Walter smiled, watching him, listening to him, oh how blue his eyes looked when his cheeks were this flushed, absolutely gorgeous.

"Oh Tristan there is no god, only me and my loving hands."

He returned, unbuckling Tristans belt and reaching in, blushing a little himself as he watched Tristans eyes nearly roll up, his head falling forward.

Tristan watched as Walter finished him off how desperately he wanted to hold onto him, press fingers into his back, he couldn't remember the last time he came this fucking hard or if he'd ever...he was speechless...breathless and fuck he'd made a mess of them both.

He was putty in Walters hands, feeling a claw lift his head again, moaning softly still, his body was tingling all over

"Welcome to the team Killian."

Beckett said sweetly before leaning in and kissing him.

[coffee-n-bagels-comic-universe]

Inside Jokes and References in the Full Bios

Mainly for @spacelizardtrashboys and @kuruumiya

Also: Any time strikethrough text is used it's because it's meant to be secret information, for example on the small bios any time 'Lucifarian' truly isn't their last name their is strikethrough test after saying that it's not their real name. This is to say that no matter what is written or if it's strikethrough text or not, it is there for a reason.

Damien - Bio In-Jokes and References:

The Quote for him refers back to his 'King of Hell' gimmick, as does his middle name, Rex means king.

He's protective, like a dad, but also way too overprotective over the gimmicks for the girls. He's an old, old school guy so he enjoys card games with the boys.

He's supposed to sound like a young Hugh Laurie, mainly because if I heard a young Hugh Laurie say Damien's bio quote I wouldn't be able to take him seriously.

His main finisher (Seventh Circle) refers back to (a) him being the king of hell and (b) the seventh circle is for violence, and well, he's a wrestler, that's a pretty violent job.

He calls fans both 'peasants' and his 'loyal subjects' because he's like an asshole-ish king who'd quickly be dethroned if they rebelled.

Vickie - Bio In-Jokes and References:

The Quote for her refers back to her gimmick along with the old saying 'pride comes before the fall'.

She's called 'Victoria' because of both (a) it meaning victory and (b) the fact that Queen Victoria ruled back when Britain had an empire, then the empire fell (as in pride [Vickie] before a fall)

Both Her and Damien are born in August and are the only two to share a birth month as they are Father and Daughter (non-kayfabe, as in they share DNA)

She's raised Christian as back when she was growing up England was a lot more Christian than when she became an adult so she got lax in her beliefs

Her personality is supposed to make her come across as a vain, rich, arse of a person, yet deep down she's still redeemable, she's got a long way to go before she actually redeems herself though

She's the type of person who makes sure EVERY little detail of her matches and promos are PERFECT to the point that she will control what other people do or say, down to the moment it's said/done and the way it's said/done

She only likes the other D.O.D (Daughters of Darkness) members because she has only made enemies in the short while they've been in the company, she especially dislikes George 'The Animal' Steele because of his very messy style going against her 'everything should be perfect' views

She's the leader, the brain and the mouth because of her control over the group, if she let them have more control, there might be less arguments about her amount of control

Her named moves are also references to both her gimmick and other things. Beheader is named because of the Tudor monarchs of England having kind of a thing for killing people in this way (ex. Henry VIII).

Lineage Ender is named that because if she ever botches that one specific move (it'll make sense in context/ she does it during a training scene) it could end either her own Lineage or the person she's doing it to.

Lion's den is called that because she traps them in a near-inescapable crucifix pin, and normally if someone goes into a den of Lions, they aren't escaping in one piece.

Family Pride is named that because not only is her gimmick the sin of pride, but she's got pride in her family and she's her dad's 'pride and joy' because she's his only child.

Wish for this (her main finishing move) is called that because it's an inside joke of "you're gonna 'wish for this' to be over soon"

As she's Damien's blood daughter, a 'prodigal son' joke seemed somewhat appropriate.

Billie - Bio In-Jokes and References:

Her quote is a reference to the Guerreros and the whole 'Latin lover' trope

She was born in February because of Valentine's day, hence why her birthday is two days before the 14th

She's 1/2 Cuban (just in general - both Mexican and Cuban culture is interesting to me) But she's 1/2 Cuban in case I ever need to write for Razor Ramon, I can get away with making the joke of 'my Cuban accent's better than yours'.

Her casual style is 'Suggestive' because how else is Lust supposed to dress.

She dislikes Hulk Hogan because she finds him incredibly annoying and she dislikes Jesse Ventura because she dislikes his fashion choices.

I imagine her uncle Hugo looks like Luis Guzman and her dad's like Raul Julia. Try to imagine those two wrestling as a luchador tag team.

Her mother was basically a valet to her dad, which was usually Billie's role before she was part of the D.O.D.

Her move name references are all song references: Love me Tender - Elvis' song of the same name, Personal Aphrodite - a reference to / joke on 'Personal Jesus', Sexual Healing - Marvin Gaye's song of the same name.

Also, I hope to eventually use the joke 'The Babe, the babe with the power,' 'What power?' 'Power of voodoo' 'Who do?' 'You do' 'Do what?' 'Remind me of the babe' because of one of her commentary nicknames being 'The Babe'

P.G - Bio In-Jokes and References:

Her quote is in reference to her being greed and (right at the start of the story) her thoughts on money actually being able to buy her happiness

her surname 'Voronin' means crow, and well, crows like shiny things, like money

she wears 'fancy but simple' clothing because if she bought designer clothes she'd be in debt, but she still wants to look like she has more money than everyone else

she's cowardly in a Jimmy Hart way, she'll piss someone off during a promo and run away once she feels like she's in danger

she's a showman because she's more show than work, meaning she works exceptionally quick matches.

Her moves are basically jokes on the fact that she is greed, such as Gold-digger and Diamond Ring. However, Money Maker is also a joke on the fact that it's a facebuster and usually an actor's face is called their 'money maker'

She hates Hulk Hogan and Sgt slaughter because of how patriotic they are

Kirby - Bio In-Jokes and References:

Her quote is a reference to (a) the fact that she's Gluttony, (b) her being the only one who wears a mask constantly and (c) her basically being the group's scare tactic against people who think they can push them around.

I am planning on eventually making her a part of the machines, maybe as a valet, maybe as a wrestler, not 100% sure as of right now

Her mother is the Norwegian-Scottish one and her father is the Irish-Welsh one

She is the tallest (not the heaviest, that's Damien) but she's still 9 inches shorter than André.

She's willing to bleed hardway, but hates blading

She hates Big John Studd because of his disrespect, she hates Hulk Hogan because she thinks he's obnoxiously 'American', she dislikes Lord Alfred Hayes and Dynamite Kid because they are so insistent on calling her '1/4 Icelandic' whenever she talks about being 1/4 Norwegian. She hates Brutus Beefcake because he's just 'so, so much' energy-wise.

She's always been tall, always shorter than André though, she was 5'6" when she was 12, which is still taller than Sam, P.G and Eli.

Kirby's the best at using folk tales and mythology references in her promos and still keeping them dark and scary.

Her speaking voice is Jessica Hynes, but I imagine her singing voice (which will be important later) to be that of Deee-lite's Lady Miss Kier. On that note, I will be putting up a post on this part of the fic's canon.

Feeding Frenzy is meant to look similar to Roddy's wild punches, hence the 'frenzy' part of the name.

Organ grinder is named because it's meant to look really hard (like she's putting all her force and weight into it) as if she's grinding her opponents organs

Hungry for Blood is an in-joke of during her toughest matches she seems hungry to give the fans the sight of blood

Consummation is a joke of 'the match will soon be over, the match will soon be concluded, or consummated' not the sex-based meaning of that word.

Number of the beast, which is 666, is a reference to the 619, and is a modified 619 basically.

Vampire's Bite is a reference to her sitout jawbreaker looking like she could possibly bite someone's neck, like a vampire, as she performs the move

I didn't want to call her chops, chops, so I made a joke of 'oh it's chopping, like a butcher's knife'

Overfeeding is another basic gluttony reference. Cheshire Grin is a facelock-based joke. Let Them Eat Cake is a butt=cake joke

The ogress is a thinly-veiled way of the commentary team calling her ugly, because why else would she be the only one in a mask

Holly - Bio In-Jokes and References:

Her quote is written that way because I always wanted her to sound like she comes from New Jersey

She's very cuddly towards the rest of the D.O.D and thus gets called a teddy bear by the others

She's Pansexual because she doesn't care what your gender is, she loves people just being themselves

She's the only ginger because I've never seen a ginger wrestler from New Jersey

She was raised Catholic but lost her faith upon realising how bad gay people are treated by the church (Holly literally just goes "Y'all it is 1984, how are y'all gonna reject people based on who they love?")

Holly's very much the person who'll ask permission to cut a promo on someone but won't tell them how harsh she's going to be

She's the group's mom friend (mum friend?)

Before she started travelling with another member of the group (Holly travels with Sam a lot) she would accidentally no-show events

She does accidentally give incredibly stiff shots

Holly likes Gorilla Monsoon because their friendship is very much a weird pseudo-dad-daughter friendship, so basically, she's using him as her new dad

Her voice is Angie Harmon because I think Harmon sounds like a badass from New Jersey

Naptime, Dirt Nap and Lullaby are jokes of 'I'm gonna knock you out'

Eli - Bio In-Jokes and References:

Her quote is a joke of 'this is why she doesn't do a lot of promos'

She's the most likely to be on one of those 'too hot for TV' blooper reels from her promos

Both she and Sam hate people taller than them

Sam - Bio In-Jokes and References:

Her quote is a reference to the fact that her tattoos are her 'masterpiece'

she dresses athletically because she's always ready for a fight, especially because she's usually the one picking fights

She likes Lou because he's like a crazy uncle to her and she likes George Steele because, unlike Vickie, she likes the wild man side of his gimmick

She's voiced by Melissa Etheridge because she's still feminine but is the most masculine sounding

[dontexpecttomakesense]

Well the last time more than shit hitting the fan it was like diarrhoea hitting the wind turbine, jesus everything was brown and ugly (we even died, again, but like jesus 3 days later we revived, again) so now that the dust has settled and the fecal matter has gone down the drain, what awaits for adastra's future?

I'm sorry but Amicus looks like he has a gray pimple on his chin

and in the great machinations of literary and dialectical irony, we have reached the relationship stage of pet names

that would get you committed

Hey

let's not forget that this botched plan led to your death, twice

I know you're trying to be conforting, but it's not

oh god, the parents turned me into robocop

some grade A bullshit I tell you, mostly the parents fault

please put that on my tombstone when I die for like, the third time in my lifespan

GAME OVER

ok it has been a while since we've taken something out of context hasn't it?

gay

gaaaaaaaaaaaaaay

And it only took what, for you to say this?

EXTRA GAY

I'm not even going to comment

press X to doubt

Once again I'm reminded why I like Virginia

Have I mentioned how much I like her?

because they are assholes, haven't we made this clear enough?

welcome to the borgs, resistence is futile

lol let's talk about long distance relationships

yeah, "free"

twice, may I add

I mean we all know we're gonna choose yes. The Parents know too, they are just presenting the illusion of a choice

bingo 

broken bones and a broken dignity, nothing new for you I supose

yes, exactly that

oh wow, you're capable of those?

And I say let him, we all know that without Cassius and Virginia Amicus would lead a terrible empire

that we did, touché

Cassius: Goodbye, I'm going to have kinky sex with Alex.

Amicus: He tried to kill you and sabotage your empire!

Cassius: That's why I said kinky Amicus.

now that is true love

well if it's ghosts, you know who to call

and his dick is back

much like I've grown to tolerate their underwear

why am I not surprised?

huzza for feminism

I mean, it's not fair but at the same time it is fair

corny

I wonder what Cassius and Alexios do to celebrate it. I'm sure that they trade highly classified governmental secrets

Parents breaking into the scene in 3... 2... 1...

I guess we wont know :)c At least not today :^)

[lambs-rest]

10, 11, and 20

Thank you for the ask!!

10. Most disliked arc? Why? I’m gonna have to say the post ARR content for two reasons! 1. PTSD. I played thought it four times before they streamlined it. 2. I know what’s coming and Thanks, I Hate It! Then again...do the pre-Titan quests count as an arc? I feel like they do.

11. Is there an unpopular character you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why? Lahabrea, obviously! Well, okay, maybe he doesn’t count because I know he’s got something by way of fans. But that doesn’t mean that Square loves him. Where’s his lore, Game? Where are his MOTIVES? WHY did he carelessly leap from vessel to vessel!? I have my own ideas, but I crave canon lore! Give us the juicy details! You can at least give us that much retroactively after the disgraceful demise he was given! There’s so much more there than just maniacal laughter, monologuing and bread memes! That said, JUSTICE FOR THE BREAD BOY! 

*Ahem* There’s plenty of characters I like that I don’t think get nearly enough positive attention. Grynewaht is one. Like...come on, he was just 20. He was still a kid, man. He didn’t deserve that kind of end :c I wish we knew how he got to where he was, but I have to reconcile myself to take his story as tragic example of the Imperial conscript system and how their soldiers are treated.

REGULA! Regula is my favourite not-an-asshole Imperial! I think he gets overlooked a lot because...well, we get to see more of him in side quests, and really? He deserved so much better. You could tell he cared about his troops and really had the betterment of the Empire in the forefront of his mind. I often wonder what he would’ve thought about his old friend toward the end of Stormblood... Would he have stood with him? Or would he be horrified?

Magnai is another! I know he gets teased because little sun~ but I actually think he’s a really neat character! His quest to find his Nhaama is a worthy one, he just needs to loosen up a little and stop scaring all the girls. It’s clear he’s firm because he’s got to worry about all the Xaela. He’s just a lil arrogant.

Also! Varis himself! He’s pretty interesting. I wish we knew more about his life (especially about his wife??? Where tf are all the Galvus family women?) Props to him for having the only quest that actually made me sweat. Primals? Raids? Pah! Who needs those when you can try to negotiate peace with Varis zos Galvus at a table while he twists everyone around his finger? Fight or flight responses were ENGAGED, man.

20. What is the purest ship in the fandom? Oh, well, ok, there’s this one ship that is really cute! Ok, so, hear me out. There’s this thighlander Queen and her himbo Doman King, and they’re both dorks who feed off each other and it’s honestly just #goals ;) But honestly Kiri and Hien always sparks joy and they win the award hands down.

Within the game? That’s hard, if only because there’s not really any ‘pure’ characters in XIV. I think the First Brood and their respective partners takes my vote. The way Ratatoskr was slain still suckerpunches me and honestly, Nidhogg’s reaction? MOOD. Gullimbursti and Ehl Tou being part of her lineage makes me bawl my eyes out every time I see them, I won’t lie. Also I can’t kill dragonets in the Churning Mists without feeling awful anymore. A pure platonic ship I really enjoyed was the growth of the father/son bond between Cerigg and Taynor in the Magic DPS job quest for SHB! I felt like the job quests did a really good job overall, but having Taynor there as someone we and Cerigg come together to support was just really wholesome and fulfilling.

[redgillan]

I’ve got you under my Skin - 4

Bucky Barnes x Reader ♀️

Summary: Modern!AU  We’ve been sleeping together on and off for almost a year and I know it’s angry hate sex but I got you a little gift because it reminded me of you.

Word Count:1,892

Warnings: Everyone’s c r y i n g

A/N: The gift has finally arrived! I lured you with the sex but now you’re stuck with the feels lol Anyway I hope you enjoy this part. Please consider leaving feedback if you like this!

It was Friday night and Natasha had invited some of her friends and colleagues over for dinner. The party in itself was boring. 

At work, Natasha had a reputation for being mysterious and she was adamant about keeping this bossy persona even though you all knew she was a huge dork. Her colleagues were terrified of her, and Bucky had to admit, it was pretty funny.

Bucky entered the kitchen and paused when he saw you. You were standing at the kitchen table with an assortment of washed vegetables in front of you. You were busy chopping vegetables into little sticks.

Things had been awkward between you after that night you spent babysitting Steve’s kid. If he closed his eyes, he could still feel your fingers on his cheek, your body pressed close to his.

You only had sex once after that night. It happened at his apartment after you had had a difficult day at work. He had taken you up against the door, no words had been exchanged at all. It had left him feeling dirty. Empty.

He wanted more than meaningless hate-sex, but he wasn’t sure what he wanted exactly. And, most importantly, he wasn’t sure what you wanted.

“Hey,” he greeted. “Nat put you to work?”

You chuckled. “Yeah. Apparently I’m not allowed to tell her colleagues she adopted a stray dog because it would-” still holding the knife, you raised your fingers to make exaggerated air quotes “-blow her cover.”

“Yeah, she’s clearly enjoyin herself,” he said, stepping closer to you. “Y’know, m’pretty sure that’s some kind of kinky roleplayin shit. Sam’s been called her ‘ma’am’ all night.”

“Nutjobs,” you laughed, shaking your head.

“I wouldn’t say that,” Bucky said, not quite touching you, but close enough that you could feel his body heat. “His crazy matches her crazy. It’s romantic in a sort of twisted way.”

The shy smile you gave him made his heart stutter. He tried not to dwell on it. Instead, he took a knife and helped you cut the carrots into little sticks.

He didn’t say a word, but the silence between you was comfortable. It was probably the first time you felt comfortable in each other’s presence.

Once you were done, Bucky playfully bumped his hip against yours. It caught your attention so you put the knife on the table and turned to him.

“I have somethin for you,” he said with a nervous grin.

“For me?” Your eyebrows raised in surprise.

Bucky reached a trembling hand into his bomber jacket pocket for the box he had decided, at the last minute, to take with him. Your eyes widened when he handed you a little white box with a baby pink ribbon tied around it.

“It’s heavier than it looks,” you commented with a laugh. “What is it?”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “I hate when people ask that. Open it ‘nd find out.”

“Okay, relax,” you laughed, pinching the end of the ribbon, untying it. “I’m opening it.”

Inside was a silver snow globe with miniature representations of the Statue of Liberty, the Empire State Building, the Flatiron Building and the Chrysler Building. The base was engraved with the New York City skyline.

Bucky was holding his breath, your lack of reaction was making him even more nervous. You just stared at the snow globe, unmoving. The silence was too loud, he had to say something.

“It’s a snow globe,” Bucky explained as if it wasn’t obvious. “My sister’s boyfriend never visited New York so we took him to all the tourist spots. I saw your collection of snow globes on your dresser the other day and I noticed you don’t have one from New York and it’s dumb ‘cause we live in New York,” he paused, nearly breathless, “so when I saw it in the shop, I thought you might like it but it’s fine if you don-”

“I love it.”

He stopped rambling and briefly wondered if he sounded as creepy as he felt. He had no idea he could talk even half that fast.

“Thank you,” you said, not looking at him.

Your voice was strained, quiet. Bucky tilted his head to the side so he could see you better. You were still staring at the snow globe, your eyes shiny with tears. It threw him off for a second. Why were you crying?

“Hey,” he said, trying to keep his tone light.

He took the snow globe from your hands and placed it on the table. You made a sound of protest, your eyes following his movement. There was panic in your eyes as if you expected him to give it to someone else.

“Let’s just put this aside for now, okay?” He took your hands in his so you had something to hold onto. “Wanna tell me what’s wrong? Whatever you say will stay between us.”

Staring down at your joined hands, you took a deep breath. “I’m fine, it’s okay.”

He freed one of his hands to gently lift your chin up. You allowed him to do that, though you still avoided his piercing blue eyes.

“Did I do somethin wrong?” he asked. “I can see you’re upset and I’m really sorry. I was tryin t’be nice,” he paused, “for once.” A big cheeky grin spread across his face when you snorted.

You took a small step back, putting some distance between you and him. Bucky didn’t mind. He would have done the same thing if the situation were reversed. You needed a moment to collect yourself. He respected that.

“It’s not you,” you finally said. “It’s the... the snow globes. They’re special,” you paused, debating whether to continue. Bucky listened avidly to anything you said. You gave him a long look as if to determine whether you could trust him.

“My best friend gave them to me when we were younger. She was travelling a lot,” you explained. “I wasn’t a big fan of these things. They were kinda useless, only collecting dust on my shelves. But now I’m old enough to admit I was jealous of her,” you said with a little laugh before your face fell. “They’re important because it’s all I have left of her. She’s gone.”

You ended your story with a little shrug, but Bucky saw right through your brave façade. You pressed your lips together and stayed quiet for a few long, painful seconds. He didn’t dare move.

Tears welled up in your eyes, threatening to spill down your cheeks. He stared at you, not knowing what to do. He’d never seen you look so vulnerable, and yet you were still trying hard to keep your composure.

Your chin started quivering and a fat tear rolled down your cheek. His protective instincts stirred. Bucky immediately went to you and pulled you into a tight hug. You wrapped your arms around his waist and held on just as tightly as he held you.

Your tears flowed, soaking the collar of his shirt. They fell in hot tracks down your cheeks; warm and strangely soothing. Your breathing slowed and the tension eased from your muscles.

Bucky held you and rocked you gently, swaying from side to side. His body was warm and solid against yours.

After a moment, you pulled back but Bucky kept you close. His hands cupped your face, his thumbs brushing away the trail of tears.

“Sorry,” you whispered, sniffing, “I don’t usually lose control like this.”

“Don’t apologize,” he said. “Feels good to cry sometimes.”

Bucky wiped snot from your nose with his sleeve. He smiled when he heard your tiny groan of embarrassment.

“I never told this story to anyone before,” you said, not quite meeting his eyes.

“It’ll stay between us,” he promised.

“I feel like an idiot.” You laughed lightly, wiping away a few stray tears as they rolled down your cheeks. “Thanks for not laughing at me.”

Bucky’s eyes widened. Yes, you had a complicated relationship but he would never make fun of you for something like this.

“Give me your hand,” he said, extending his palm.

You complied without hesitation and it made his heart do funny things. He folded his hand around your fingers and brought your hand to his chest. He slipped your joined hands under his shirt and guided them to his bare shoulder.

“Do you feel this?” he asked, pressing your fingers over a long, bumpy scar. “Almost lost my arm when I was ten. Some punk ass kids beat the crap outta me. My parents took me to the ER but I never told anyone what had happened. Not even Steve. These kids bullied me for months. It was hell.”

You ran your fingers over the scar again. “I won’t tell anyone.”

“I know,�� he nodded, a smile on his lips.

You frowned at him and reached up to brush a tear from his cheek. “Why are you crying?”

“Dunno.” Bucky shrugged. “I feel like an asshole. Didn’t mean to make you cry. I’m sorry.”

“Same here,” you said with a smile. “Damn, we’re stuck in a loop.”

He let out an airy laugh. “Fuckin vicious circle.”

He reluctantly let go of your hand. You couldn't think of anything to say, and to fill the awkward silence between you, you took the snow globe and gave it a good shake. You watched with a smile as the snow swirled around the miniature monuments.  

“I’m gonna go home.” You pressed the snow globe against your chest, hoping he’d understand you were incredibly grateful for it. “Thank you, Bucky. I love it.” You took a step closer and kissed his cheek, lingering a little longer than necessary.

Bucky stood frozen, feeling like someone had turned the heat up in his chest. He was seeing you in a different light. You had allowed him to see you at your most vulnerable, giving him a part of yourself you always kept hidden deep inside. You trusted him.

In return, he opened up to you, trusting you completely.

You were walking out of the room when he shook himself out of his self-induced trance. “Wait!” He turned around to face you. He didn’t want to let you go.

Let me drive you home. I think I ruined a good opportunity to show you I care for you. I don’t like seein you cry. It fuckin kills me.

That’s what he tried to say, but no sound came out of his mouth. You were frowning at him, concern etched on your face.

“I know,” he spoke, his voice hoarse. He cleared his throat and tried again. “I know you and I have a... complicated friendship but I,” he paused, his stomach was in knots, “-please text me when you get home, all right?”

A smile spread across your face. “You worried about me?”

“What if I am?” he questioned back defensively.

Your smirk softened into a real smile. “I’ll text you.”

You waved goodbye and left, your footsteps echoing on the wooden floor as you made your way back to the living room.

Alone in the kitchen, Bucky slumped down in a chair. He felt a burst of heat coil low in his stomach. He sighed, running a hand down his face. Yeah, he had it bad, and now he had to do something about it or he’d lose his goddamn mind.

[chubbyooo]

Blurred Lines: Cursed Past Chapter 72 - A Common Enemy

hey all had a little block but it’s over now :D

Kyradia and Ashara head to Kowak to follow Zash’s trail

Kyradia saw the planet of Kowak come into view; well this was bound to be interesting, she could only begin to imagine the reasons why Zash had broken into a botanical plant. She was up to something with the nightsisters but the planet selection didn’t add up what the heck was there on Kowak except those weird monkey lizards certainly no magick.

Still there must be something on these planets that the nightsisters wanted, she never understood the culture even though she despised it the Wrath had never really explained her methods. She was feeling weirdly calm, Dzûsa’s weird class had chilled her out somewhat, it was kinda odd, she was just glad no one had seen it. How long would it last though she already felt her brain freaking out a little in the back of her mind, it never ever stopped not since she could remember she doubted it ever would. It was difficult to explain her mind to be honest if she understood it she’d probably not have such a problem dealing with it.

Andronikos grumbled “is this that place where those weird monkey lizards are from” Kyradia chuckled Andronikos had always been uncomfortable around them

Ashara nodded “yeah Nik why do you not like them?” Andronikos didn’t respond just looked away

Kyradia chuckled “he thinks they’re creepy he’s super scared of them” Ashara chuckled as Andronikos glowered at Kyradia

Ashara stifled her laughs “oh wow are you serious Andronikos” Kyradia gave a teasing smile Andronikos was all too familiar with at this point.

Andronikos sulked “I’m not scared of them they’re just creepy have you heard their laughs why would anyone have them as a pet” Kyradia recalled the time she’d chased Andronikos around the ship in a monkey lizard mask last Harvest day, needless to say he was less than pleased with the costume

Kyradia smirked “He won’t let me have one as a pet Ashara I can’t see any reason why” Ashara chuckled clearly enjoying the quarrel

Ashara smiled “I can’t see any reason why not maybe we’ll find one while we’re there” Andronikos narrowed his eyes as he landed the ship

He turned around “I swear you better not Ashara” Kyradia chuckled getting up and giving him a peck on the cheek

Kyradia smiled “you’ll have to wait and see” she gestured for Ashara to follow as they headed to the landing ramp

Ashara turned to her as they exited the ship “so I assume we’re not actually gonna do that?” Kyradia smirked and shook her head

She chuckled “oh no trust me he’d kill me if we did I just enjoy messing with him, he’ll get me back soon enough” Ashara nodded with a smile as they began to walk towards the plant

Ashara responded “he seems to be starting to accept I’m back, I think me saving your life helped with that” Kyradia laughed yeah that would help

“Yeah he may have been harsh at first but Andy can’t hold a grudge for too long” she laughed “otherwise he’d be furious at me for a million pranks” Ashara chuckled looking away for a second

Ashara’s tone shifted “and what about you are you feeling better?” Kyradia didn’t know if better was the word for it

Kyradia nodded “sorta I guess” she looked away “I dunno I feel calmer but it’s kinda tough keeping it all at bay” Ashara nodded she looked a little dejected, Kyradia knew she wanted to know what was up but Kyradia couldn't explain it’s just too much.

Ashara smiled “well I’m here regardless and I got us a lead that didn’t damage your psyche so that’s a win if you ask me” Kyradia guessed that was a plus but they would’ve gotten here sooner if she’d been involved

Kyradia folded her arms “what is this place anyway?” They were now at the front gates of a moderately sized compound that looked a little damaged, the break in was clear but Zash had never been subtle.

Ashara held her chin “it’s some kind of botanical plant, they were testing the effects of certain plant pheromones and substances on the monkey lizards” Kyradia frowned she understood very little of that sentence

Kyradia sighed “uh Ashara can you dumb that down to someone who wasn’t educated in the republic or empire” Ashara’s eyes widened realising her confusion

Ashara nodded “they were testing the plant stuff against the animals to see if their behaviour changed” Kyradia nodded since when did plants affect animals, science was a mystery.

Kyradia stroked her chin “and what was the result?” she had a hunch but it wasn’t confirmed yet

Ashara shrugged “dunno didn’t read that much into it” Ashara knocked on the door then realised there was an intercom and shuffled over to it awkwardly “Hi this is Ashara Zavros I called earlier about helping with the break in” she seemed a little stunted talking to normal people Kyradia doubted she’d done a lot of it in a while.

A crackle came back “what’s your clearance” oh great clearence everyones favourite bureaucratic bs.

Kyradia walked up to the comm “Commander Kyradia of the Alliance I’m pretty sure there is no higher clearance” hopefully she sounded agitated enough

There was a long pause before “oh yes of course come right in commander” Kyradia smiled gesturing for Ashara to follow, they made their way across the compound to the large glass building.

As they reached the door a Duros waiting for them, he stammered “y-you’re the commad-” Kyradia didn’t have time for this guy

Kyradia interrupted “-der of the alliance yes I know I’m amazing such a honour to meet me take me to you boss before I decide to use your head as a kickball” the duros’ eyes widened as he quickly led them into the lab.

Kyradia had never been in a botanical lab and was surprised to see it looked just like a regular jungle, they must have tonnes of rare species in here, Ashara shuffled up to Kyradia and whispered “maybe don’t threaten every person who’s helping us” Kyraida scoffed she wasn’t allowed to threaten people now

Kyradia folded her arms “but he’s helping us out faster now” Ashara frowned at her “fine I’ll use ‘tact’” Ashara smiled and followed along behind her. 

Soon the Duros led them into a more open lab room with no plants in it, there was a woman with red and black hair seemingly working at a desk, Kyradia frowned that wasn’t very common. The Duros mumbled “here we are may I go now” Kyradia nodded barely registering the Duros as she focussed on the woman.

Ashara spoke up “I thought they were supposed to be testing on plants in here” Kyradia has to agree but had a feeling the answer would be Zash

A very familiar modulated echoed voice filled the chamber “that’s exactly the reason you are here” she turned around “it was vandi…” she stopped in shock as her eyes met with Kyradia’s, Kyradia smiled she knew she recognised that hair it was Darth Malora “c-commander it’s such a surprise to see you here this seems a little above your pay grade” Kyradia smiled she wished she had that effect on everyone

Kyradia strode over “yes well I have a personal interest in your burglars” Malora nodded stroking her chin “I have been on their tail for a while now and I need to know what happened here, but first…” Kyradia pulled up a chair “I have to know how a dark council member ended up as a low level scientist on Kowak” Malora narrowed her eyes containing her anger as Kyradia taunted her

Ashara shuffled up “um did I miss something, you two know each other?” Kyradia turned to Ashara she guessed Ashara had always just missed their interactions

Malora spoke “we were apprentices at the same time and had helped each other out a few times, Darth Malora a ‘pleasure’ to meet you” Ashara was clearly a bit put off by Malora’s looks the corruption had certainly done a number on her or maybe the science could be either

Kyradia smiled “Former Darth actually, we met last year on Ossus she was the new dark council member until Malgus kinda threw her off the landing platform” Kyradia could see an audible shudder from Malora clearly that was a sore point “so I see it didn’t get better after that?” Malora gritted her teeth clearly furious with Kyradia

Kyradia wasn’t scared she’d beat her in a second, Malora folded her arms “After your offer to join the alliance I decided taking some time to regain some of my lost potential was important, at heart I am a scientist so I began a new batch of experiments” Kyradia frowned she guessed that made sense but with alliance funding she could’ve done much more.

Ashara frowned “so you came to Kowak?” Malora nodded seeming to not see any problem with that

She had a rather weird smile “there is a plant here called springwort its bile has a remarkable effect on animals; turns them savage and carnivorous” Kyradia’s eyes widened. That was not good if Zash had it regardless of the ways she used it but what if… Malora continued “I was thinking if manipulated the right way I could create a new type of foot soldier kind of like my Geonosians” Kyradia shook her head out of a daze she’d fallen into

She frowned “you mean the Geonosians that you lost control of and they attacked everyone?” Malora gritted her teeth clearly not a fan of Kyradia pointing out the problems in her ideas

Ashara gasped “she did what?!” Kyradia nodded looking between them

“Yeah I had to clear the mess up she still hasn’t said thanks” Kyradia did want that thanks from her, she frowned realising they were very off track.

Malora let out a loud sigh “this wouldn’t be like that believe me I’ve learned my lesson from using mutations they’re unstable and can easily change this would be something I could turn on and off like a sort of berserker rage” Kyradia knew all too well what going into a rage felt like but she could see it’s application definitely more so than the geonosian idea.

They needed to get back on track, the gloating time was over, they were here for leads on Zash “and I’m guessing the bile is what the burglars stole?” Malora nodded gesturing to a pile of blackened roots

She gripped the arm of her chair tightly as she spoke “not only that they turned the plant to that, it was as big as this room before hand” typical Zash if she has it no one else can “I tried to fight off the acolytes but I underestimated the blonde she was very powerful” Kyradia somehow wasn’t surprised

Kyradia shook her head “well that’ll be because that blonde was not just a young acolyte that was my old master Darth Zash” Malora frowned at that her face turning to a smile

She chuckled “very funny Nox but I’d prefer you be serious” Kyradia narrowed her eyes and quickly Malora’s expression changed filling with dread “oh you’re serious” Kyradia nodded

She explained “years ago she tried to steal my body but I trapped her in my Dashade, as soon as I could I then trapped her in a mind prison, it took her years but she got out and took a very powerful young acolyte with her taking her form, that’s why she’s such a threat” Malora nodded her expression becoming far more serious and maybe a little fearful

Ashara spoke up “you knew Zash too?” Malora held her chin shaking her head

She responded “not personally but I knew her through Kyradia and by reputation I knew her power” Ashara looked at Kyradia and frowned

She folded her arms “Since when were you and Malora friends?” Kyradia rolled her eyes Ashara had just met her and already questioning 

Kyradia shook her head “I told you, we weren’t friends we just had done a few favours for each other” Malora nodded clearly agreeing

Malora sighed “yes and after Zash became a darth you and her disappeared from Korriban, but if she’s back why hasn’t she revealed herself to the dark council?” Kyradia wasn’t exactly sure beyond the fact that the current dark council was a bunch of melon headed idiots.

Kyradia shrugged “I assume it’s because she wants to accumulate more power before revealing herself, the bile was a step towards that” Malora nodded she had become a lot less angry and more pensive since she brought up Zash

Malora frowned “Do you know how, is there some property I missed? And if so are you sure it was even her” Kyradia sighed someone was in heavy denial

Kyradia folded her arms “well honestly I don’t know what she wants with it but I do know how to know it was her, was she with a Mirilian with white hair” Malora nodded reluctantly “and the giant dent in the floor and the dead plant suggests an immense amount of power she wields so those are clues too, not the first time you’ve been thrown off something by a powerful sith” she couldn’t help herself

Malora scoffed “yes alright I was bested again you can stop gloating because I know where they’re going” Kyraida’s eyes went wide “but I have a condition on telling you” Kyradia’s hand brushed over her saber “I want to come with you, this research is important to me and I’m not going to let someone as self serving as Zash take it from me” Kyradia’s grip relaxed off her saber

She looked to Ashara “I don’t see any reason why not, I mean I offered you a job before I think she has plenty of potential” Malora laughed at that dismissing the comment

She shook her head “let me be clear this is just about my research working with you is unfortunately a necessity” Kyradia didn’t believe that but whatever

Ashara nodded “of course it is Malora, still welcome aboard but if you’re going to join us there are a few rules” Kyradia nodded as Malora let out and echoed groaned

Kyradia cut in “no sitting on the ship, when using the force you cannot use lightning when I’m around, if you ever ask me about my tattoos ‘meaning’ I will gut you, no talking after 1pm, no forks and knives only spoons, when you... ” Ashara was glaring at Kyradia

Ashara spoke up “those are all false… except maybe the tattoos one” Kyradia nodded “the actual rules are simple, no secrets unless they’re traumatic, listen to me if you’re stressed out or angry and uh try to act with a hint of morality” Malora nodded cocking her head at Kyradia

Malora smiled “has this one made you go soft Kyradia” Kyradia raised her eyebrow soft how dare she

She stood up “why don’t you come over here and find out” Malora nodded seemingly satisfied with the threat “now where are they going?” Malora got out a datapad and started to find the planet

Malora explained “A desert planet called Savareen I managed to track the hyperlane they took due to… previous engagements I had it ready to track” Kyradia chuckled paranoid much “I don’t know what they’re doing there but we can catch up if we go now” Ashara nodded seemingly ready to go

Kyradia raised her eyebrow “alright Malora wanna go kick a sith’s teeth in?” Malora smiled seemingly excited to get back to the action, she tossed her lab coat aside and followed after them...

[aristccrvcy]

( gavin leatherwood, trans male, he/him, fire emblem: three houses ) * &. i know it must be scary for you, ferdinand von aegir, after surviving the takeover. to turn into someone like aeric-ferdinand “ferdie” vittori, a twenty-four year-old actor at castle town centre of theatre & dance, right here in castle town. just remember that you are as sincere as you are opinionated, and to be wary, be safe, be true to who you are : neutral through and through. ( hylia )

         i could never drop him i just. i could Not. i rly couldn’t but i DID ..... want to revamp him a bit so here’s take two on ferdie !! politics, war, death, & divorce tw under the cut !!

BEFORE THE SNAP.  /  F E R D I N A N D  V O N  A E G I R 

So alright. Chances are , if you’ve heard of Ferdinand , it’s because you’ve heard the infamous ‘ I am Ferdinand von Aegir ! ’ quote goin’ around which . . . attributes from. Him introducing himself every time you select him on the battlefield in FE3H. Don’t believe me ?? WATCH. 

...u don’t need to watch that whole thing I’m just tryna get the meme out of the way before I talk abt everything else.

BC ALL JOKES ASIDE I HONESTLY LOVE FERDINAND SOOO MUCH n I promise I’ll take him seriously bc holy fucking shit this character is my babyyyy.

So for STARTERS. Ferdinand is the legitimate son of House Aegir in the Adrestian Empire , which is the house that produces the Empire’s Prime Ministers. Now , here’s the thing ; Ferdinand himself isn’t involved in any of this , but thanks to the Adrestian nobles pretty much stripping the Emperor of their power in the past . . . the Aegir house ( much like the other houses , but Duke Aegir’s implied to have like , spearheaded it ) is pretty damn corrupt.

NOT FERDINAND , THOUGH , considering Ferdinand is actually someone who has very opposing views to his father. Ferdinand , in a nutshell , is basically the snobby noble trope you’re expecting turned upside down crossed over with a Disney prince. That’s the best way i can describe him.

Ferdinand is very aware of his noble status , but he is very steadfast in his opinion of what is truly means to be a noble. He’s well-aware of the difference between nobles & commoners , but where you’d expect him to use that to degrade people of lesser status , he . . . doesn’t. 

Ferdinand strongly believes the duties of a noble constitute of protecting & helping the common people , and that is why they’re so high in status - they’re there to assist and make things better , and not to make things worse , and it absolutely sickens him to his core when there are corrupt nobles who very clearly use their power for selfish & malicious gain. 

Like , he’s confident - he’s very confident and sure of himself , but he isn’t a dick ( in that sense ; he can be kind of a dick , don’t get me wrong ) about it. He’s actually extremely polite & respectful , very kind & genuine - like I really don’t think lying is something that this boy is capable of doing , I really don’t. But he’s humble in the sense that he isn’t afraid to admit when he did something wrong , or that he needs to apologize - IN FACT , a lot of his supports have him apologize for approaching someone wrongly or when he’s accused of something.

One example , he has a support with Dorothea where she tells him that she hates him , and instead of fighting her on it , what he does is he tries to figure out why she hates him so he can better himself and fix something he did wrong. 

Another example , his B-support with Bernadetta has him apologize for spooking her , and he respects her comfort levels by speaking to her on the other side of the door to her room because now he understands that Bernadetta feels extremely scared & uncomfortable during confrontation.

LIKE . . . okay , in the simplest of words , Ferdinand is just good. He’s a good person and he tries his hardest to be better if someone brings it to his attention that he’s doing something wrong.

BUT ALSO . . . the thing is , Ferdinand is also extremely opinionated to the point where he’ll share his thoughts even if not asked ; and sometimes , it comes out. Dickish. Like , really , he’ll criticize anyone if he believes he should because he hates the idea of someone who doesn’t - exemplified in the beginning of his supports with Hubert , where he condemns Hubert for not openly criticizing Edelgard but Ferdinand’s criticism can come out . . . harsh. Like , he’s respectful still , but he’s harsh. And that is because Ferdinand firmly believes in speaking his mind.

His determination also makes him stubborn & extremely competitive to a point where it becomes damn near annoying and this is , because again , he always strives to better himself - even going as far as to declare Edelgard his rival when she . . . really doesn’t think of him as one , and then he gets his ass kicked and runs with his tail between his legs because he lost. He’s. He’s competitive. I will not lie to you. Like he’s great but aLSO... this guy doesn’t. Know. When to let go.

Bt yeah in a nutshell - Ferdinand is a rich guy who criticizes other rich guys for being jerks and not caring abt other people , and he can come off as a dick but ultimately he means well & he is a LOT better than some of these other assholes out there. Ferdinand’s.... he’s just GOOD. 

Bt now that I have the basis of his character out of the way , I want to mention that a major change about him is that I’m changing what route I’m pulling him from - originally , I pulled him from Azure Moon , where if you don’t recruit him you have to kill him at the Great Bridge of Myrddin. So instead , now , I’ll be pulling him from Crimson Flower , where he’s still sided with Edelgard but now she has Byleth & she’s triumphant and everything’s okay on the Empire’s end. But - in other routes - while he’s still with Edelgard , he unfortunately doesn’t make it so if u have AM or VW muses . . . Ferdie didn’t make it.

BUT THAT’S WHAT MAKES THESE THINGS INTERESTINGGGGG and I love it so for that reason ,,, shoves. Ferdinand. In everyone’s direction.

AFTER THE SNAP.  /  A E R I C - F E R D I N A N D  “ F E R D I E ”  V I T T O R I

So the more major changes from his pre-revamp portrayal lie in his CT life - his name’s changed , his occupation’s changed , and almost his entire whole past has changed.

Aeric-Ferdinand Vittori was the only child of a film actor & stage actress , pretty famous people , and he was born with the spotlight on him immediately given that he scored his first role as a child at six years old. Since then , he never really had much of an easy time.

His big break was as a teenager in a teen drama that lasted from when he was fourteen to when he was nineteen , the co-star of a vampire television drama in where his character was a fan-favorite. He ultimately left the show and his character was killed off , and he had some starring roles in other movies & the like before he ultimately moved to Broadway. And in that , he had a bit of an easier time , but he would still often feel like he was about to crack under pressure since all eyes were still on him. He was known as a talented young man with a beautiful singing voice , and unfortunately , everyone wants something to do with you when you have something like that.

His parents were also always in the spotlight because of their very public divorce , and it started to bleed into Ferdinand’s career & public image as well with many people poking their nose into his life and asking his opinion on it. Multiple scandals came out claiming that he leaned one way or the other during it and ultimately , that ruined his relationship with his parents. So at twenty-three , he left the Broadway spotlight , and decided to step out of any light in general for a while.

Settling down in Castle Town , a place where nobody bothered to look , was a good start.

He still loved performing , so he worked as an actor at the local theatre on stage - trying his hardest not to get the big roles and take those up , because he was still a relatively big name & when you’re a big name , people lean into their biases.

And then . . . at this point was where he “woke up”. Because his whole past was fake - but there’s always a point where you realize it is.

He had a girlfriend in Castle Town beforehand that he broke up with due to his paranoia that she’d get caught up in the publicity that he did - Nerissa. And he had parents that he didn’t even talk to anymore , and it threw him for a loop because he was reminded of his father back in Adrestia. And suddenly , he’s no longer a soldier or a noble , but with his celebrity status , he’s basically the closest there is to modern nobility at this point.

So . . . Ferdinand feels. Strange. He always loved the opera & he always loved performances but he never thought of himself as someone who would actually do so. It’s strange , but he likes it.

So now , he’s trying to figure out exactly what the hell happened and how he got here and he’s grown pretty used to people not remembering who he is , but it still . . . hurts.

And THAT is where I end this !! I’m gonna go back 2 my plotting DMs and message more ppl but if this gives u some ideas pls do hit me up bc I love Ferdie SOOOO MUCH and I’m excited for his revamp !!

Also if ur curious ab his old intro still I’ll link it here bc there’s probably some pre-snap stuff I forgot in here that’s in there so !! yes. i’ll b around n will probs try n get an open up soon !!

[local-star-wars-kinda-nerd]

Episode IX review.

In short, my primary reaction was facepalm.

I had a bad feeling about this episode since first teaser has been released. It made me feel... nothing, which was strange. When any teaser or trailer for previous films had been released, I got excited about these movies. Every one of them: from The Force Awakens to Solo. But not this time. And, unfortunately, I was right (at least for myself).

Detailed review is under cut, as well as spoilers are. You've been warned. I also want to warn you that I'm not professional critic, just a fan like a lot of other people.

IMHO, the whole trilogy should've been made by one director. No guarantee this would make these movies a lot better, but at least the story would've been whole. Why am I saying this? Because one of the biggest, if not the main, problems of TROS is it's trying to apologize before fans for mistakes made in episode VIII. Instead of trying to fix them, giving a good and understandable explanation for questions left after TLJ, they just said: "Forget about episode VIII ever existed". No jokes, I could've just watch TROS after TFA without watching TLJ and only questions I'd have are where is Snoke, why Kylo's mask is destroyed, where is Luke. And that's disappointing. I'm not saying episode VIII was perfect, it has done some things wrong, but also some things were good. And they should work on fixing bad and improving good. I realize that J.J.Abrams was given an impossible task: to finish Star Wars saga with the most unstable fan base. TROS was gonna be hated anyway, no matter what director has done with it.

Okay. What I liked about The Rise of Skywalker?

- More Poe and Finn interactions. I know it's not enough, but they made a really cool bromance.

- C-3PO. Just C-3PO.

- Luke training Leia the Jedi ways.

- The idea of redeemed Kylo Ren (or Ben Solo at this point). I only wish his redemption arc has been executed better.

- Hey, they haven't forgotten about Anakin's existence, the true Chosen One.

- Visual effects. As always, magnificent.

- Lightsaber duels also looked good.

- Luke admitting that he made mistakes and that he shouldn't been hiding on Ach-To.

- Hey, they showed that Rey had some kind of training.

- Finn turned out to be Force-sensitive. I thought it would be cool since TFA has been released.

- Music, because I love John Williams' work obviously. Though sometimes some tracks from other episodes in this movie seemed off.

Now, to things I disliked or even hated (forgive me, I'm a simple human being with the right to feel negative emotions towards things. I'm not gonna hate or blame other people for their disagreement with me):

- Too fast. TROS had some good scenes, but I couldn't feel their weight and importance because everything was going too fast.

- Maybe it's just me, but despite movie's best efforts it hasn't managed to convince me that the main trio is a team. Poe and Finn - yes, their friendship was obvious since TFA. Finn and Rey - also believable friendship (for me). But I never got feeling that all of them are good team, best friends. A New Hope managed to make the same thing way better.

- Kylo's mask. In TLJ destroying the mask was important point of his character arc. Snoke just humiliated him for being beaten by a just scavenger and pointed at that Kylo isn't Vader, only a child wearing a mask and pretending to be his famous grandfather. And at this moment Kylo decides to stop trying to be someone else (even someone he idolizes) and finally try to be himself. And then he repairs it in TROS. Why? There is no explanation in movie. My guess is on a huge amount of hate towards Adam Driver and his appearance.

- Remember Rose from TLJ? Well, either your answer is yes or no, forget about her. You barely will be able to notice her role in this movie. Yes, she did questionable thing. Yes, she was hated by half of fans. And that's why you will even forget that she was here.

- Palps is back! Remember how he returned from dead in EU? He's also not dead in our movie! So it vanishes importance of every episode made by Lucas, so what? Ya boy Palps is back! Aren't you glad? Okay, no jokes. When a lot of people hated TFA and TLJ, I thought: "Hey, at least these episodes haven’t made the biggest mistake EU's post-Endor made (and by this said "Anakin's sacrifice and Luke's path don't matter! Balance isn't restored, Sith are still there, the Empire isn't dead yet, have fun!") - they haven't brought Sidious back. Sequels still have a chance to be a not bad trilogy". And then the teaser happened. Honestly, his comeback feels like a YouTube theory on the big screen. That's what you expected from the finale of great Skywalker saga? Total unimportance of Skywalker's sacrifice. Alright, it would be only half of trouble. The real pain is Palpatine's comeback makes no sense. How he survived? Why waited so long? What he even wanted? What was his plan?

- If there is a thing I liked the most about The Last Jedi, it's Rey's parents being just scavengers, who sold their daughter for drinks. Again, since I watched TFA in theater, I was hoping the creators won't make Rey Skywalker, Kenobi, Palpatine, Bridger, or anyone else at this point. But no. She is Palpatine's granddaughter. And somehow this explains her abilities. I have no idea how. And it also feels like writers were looking for YouTube theories about Rey's bloodline and just picked the most popular one.

- Rey is Mary Sue. More than ever. I absolutely don't mind her a being powerful Force-user, but please, can anybody explain me how she manages to use tricks without training some Jedi couldn't use even with years of training and practicing? This explanation from TLJ novel sucks, honestly. In TFA she used mind trick. How? Okay, she did only once, maybe that's all. In TLJ she moves a hella lot rocks. How? Alright, not everything is too bad. But in TROS she is using Force lightning, healing, she holds a ship(!). And that's because... what? Palpatine's blood? No. No, and again no. Being daughter of someone powerful doesn't mean you can now do every-freaking-thing with the Force you want. And thing is, she face no consequences of such power. What do you say? She killed Chewbacca? Nope, he's alive, and we didn't even have time to believe in his death, and Rey has no time to realize the cost her uncontrolled power. Does she need help in defeating Palpatine? Well, voices of Jedi helped her to rise, but why it had to be her alone? If you present us Rey and Kylo being a diade (sorry for spelling, wasn’t watching in English), be so nice to use it.

- Redeemed Ben doesn't matter. He isn't remembered, no one's gonna be upset of his death, he won't show in the final scene as a member of Skywalker family (and why Anakin isn't there is big mystery too).

- I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings. Reylo. Yet another thing I didn’t want to be brought into movies since TFA. I don’t believe in their love. I can believe that Kylo cares for Rey after she shows some amount of compassion towards him, something he hasn't got in years. I can accept that Rey wants to help Kylo to return to light (honestly no idea why she does, but I can accept it), but not love to death. They just didn’t have enough time or interactions to make their feelings believable, if these feeling are even real. As someone who thinks that Arcann's romance is pretty fast, even it is way more believable (and his redemption arc is better, too).

In the end, question is, was the sequel trilogy needed? Maybe. The story could've been finished better. Was this trilogy needed? I'd say no. Nothing has really changed, we still don't know if Jedi Order is going to be reborn, or the new order will come to replace them, or what is going to be with all Force-sensitive at all. This episode was supposed to be the finale of whole Star Wars saga, but for a finale it leaves way too many questions about future. As finale of Skywalker story, there's not enough Skywalker's influence for victory over Palpatine. Especially Anakin's. He is the Chosen One (or at least was before TROS), and everything he did to finally bring Palpatine down in this movie is... said a few lines. No more than any other Jedi. It destroys all previous episodes for me. It hurts me to admit that for the first time I was shocked by how a Star Wars movie turned out. In bad meaning. Of all new movies The Last Jedi was my least favorite, and still I like it. The Force Awakens had great potential, even with everything Abrams did. Solo was such a satisfying story for me. Rogue One is personal favorite of new movies. But The Rise of Skywalker made me sad and disappointed. And that's considering I love a lot of Star Wars. For me, it wasn't worth it.

[clusterfucks]

Stop fucking up vampires.

All right you angsty teen shit pricks, I have had it up to HERE with your disgusting vampire portrayals. I’m gonna teach y’all on how vampires really are so you can cut the shit out of your dumb fan fictions. Saddle down and listen because this is gonna take a while. 

A. ORIGIN OF THE GARLIC CRAP: So theres this guy called Asklepios and hes the god of medicine. He found out how to raise the dead but Zeus said “you need to cut that shit out it’ll upset the balance of the force” and killed Asklepios. Fortunately, Asklepios was a tricky bitch and wrote down the formula for immortality on a piece of paper, that was buried and grew the first garlic plants. Because of this garlic has special healing properties, namely, it is a anticoagulant. Now if you really wanna sit there and tell me that this plant with immortality connotations and blood flowing juices is actually bad for vampires and not just an elaborate lie to make people’s blood easier to suck, then you do you. Just know that you are wrong. 

B. THIS SHITS FUCKING DARK. Did you know that back in ye olde days, if you were suspected of being a vampire the villagers would CUT OUT YOUR HEART, CREMATE IT, and FEED IT TO YOUR FAMILY. The only fucking sparkling going on with vampires is the tears of your children as they watch the local doctor cut out your organs because you coughed twice in a row during church. They aren’t fucking pretty sparkle boy toys, STEPHANIE. 

C. STOP IGNORING ROMANIA. Romania is so frigging cool why the actual fuck are you writing high school au’s when you could be writing about civilizations that would leave a wooden stake through the heart of every enemy solider after battles??? Vlad Dracul was third in line for the throne and once his two brothers were assassinated do you know what he did? HE WAGED WAR WITH THE FUCKING OTTOMAN EMPIRE. GET THIS PART STRAIGHT: ROMANIA FOUGHT THE ENTIRE OTTOMAN EMPIRE, AND WAS WINNING. He would stab people through the neck and leave them in front of the castle to promote fear. He waged war so well that he had almost won the freaking war against one of the biggest empires in world history before he died. I stan one (1) legend. ALSO they had Elizabeth Bathory. Who was Elizabeth Bathory? She took the phrase “you are what you ate” two literally and killed every pretty young girl she could find to take their features. She would eat parts of them that she liked whole. She killed an estimate of over 160 girls. You like your nose? She would fucking bite that shit right off your face and move on to the next girl. Penguin style. Some sources say she bathed in their blood. I-fucking-conic. These two single single handedly created the (hopefully apparent by now) myth about vampires and wooden stakes AND the blood sucking part. God tier. They’re fucking god tier Stephanie. 

D. VAMPIRES AREN’T INHERENTLY IMMORTAL. Blood is a persons life force, vampires need to keep drinking blood or they’ll die. Get off your teenage romance bullshit and write about vampires who grow normally for 75 years with their partner and then suck the blood out of that partner so they can restart again. Give the people what they want. Cowards. This is the only fucking romance with vampires that I will tolerate from you butter fucks.

E. GET THE FUCKING HISTORY RIGHT. Guillain-Barré syndrome and catalepsy paralyses its victims, it affects a lot of people with schizophrenia, people would be buried, claw their way out of the grave, then be treated as a vampire because they have a history of acting as if they were possessed by a demon and came back from the “dead”. Rabies would cause “Aversion to light and water, aggression, biting and delirium” in people, this is probably a major cause to the origin of the myth, if it is a myth and current scholars are not just explaining away vampirism. The bite marks for rabies might have brought about the biting neck thing. Peasants thought that plague victims were vampires because of the blood around their mouths. Porphyria caused sensitivity to sunlight (exposure caused blisters) and increased forehead hair. The people with these diseases would be cast out of town for vampirism. My theory is that these people cross bred and their children, after hundreds of years became vampires. Imagine what you could do with this. Vampires who hate humans because their ancestors were cast out of the town. Vampires who are more sensitive to some things because they had more ancestors with that disease. The villagers, out of fear of vampirism, creating vampirism. THESE are good ideas. Sparkling sexy vampire man makes out with stuck up not-like-other-girls lady is NOT a good idea. 

In fucking short you rat bastards are missing so many freaking opportunities with vampires. I don’t care if you write romance, but do it fucking right. My asexual ass read twilight hoping for some fucking vampires and got a predictable, crappy, smut vampire book. Get them fucking right. Please note that it is my destiny to defeat Stephanie Meyers in mortal combat. Until I do that I physically cannot die or even feel emotions so you teen wolf horny 13yo’s can keep your trash opinions on vampires to yourself. And all you fan fiction writers, or just writers in general, don’t make shit up or you will become my mortal enemy, and I swear to god I will show up at your home, cremate your fucking eyeballs, mix them with cocaine and snort them through a rolled up copy of your trash fucking story.   

EDIT: I’m getting a lot of bitches in the comments going “calm down let people enjoy their vampires guy” but no, you people have permanently damaged the reputation of vampires forever already. If you think i’m gonna stand by and watch you ignore all of the perfect vampire lore for teen romance you’re fucking wrong. LeT pEoPlE hAvE tHiS, there are already a billion teenage boys for you to piss on don’t piss on vampires in the process, let me, and everyone else who likes og vampires have them. You want to fuck a dark angsty teenager? Fuck off to some emo fandom and leave these quality people to the quality writers who have some sort of plot or research to base their story on instead of just their horny teenage fantasys. 

[resievilchic96]

I was tagged by @theoracleofllaena to answer 11 questions here so let’s just skip the formalities and hop right to it, shall we?

1. What was your favorite era of animation?  (eg. “golden age” or decades like 1980′s, etc)

    I’d have to say any animation by Don Bluth b/c his style of animation very beautiful to me. I think his works range from the 80s to 90s to even 2000s with Titan A.E.

2. Is college/university a waste of money in your experience? 

     Yes, the costs are outrageous in several areas from classes to textbooks to dorms, hell even cafeteria food. I mean sure there’s scholarships,finanicial aid, loans, grants and such but come on. You have so many still paying off loans and are not able to secure their dream jobs yet b/c of the economy and times have massively changed. But college degrees are required on a lot of jobs out there so you got to do what you got to do.

3. What is your favorite “black sheep” video game, as in the worst-reviewed or least-popular game in a series?

    I would have to say Tomb Raider Chronicles, I usually see that one end up really low on top games and ranked next to worst of all the Tomb Raider games. Most complaints were that if felt stale using the same engine and “been there done that” plots and gameplay but this was actually my first Tomb Raider game I ever played so it was all new to me then. I had fun with it and it still holds a special place in my heart b/c it got me into the series.

4.  Add-on to previous question: Do you feel like long-term or “established” fans are too harmful to newcomers to a given franchise?(game/movie/book/whatever)

     Some can sour the experience and be annoying as hell but not all long-term or “established” fans are bad just like not all “newer” fans are bad either. You’re gonna have your good and bad apples in any groups you come across. I say keep it small in fandoms, find your people you gel with and have fun. 

5. What is the weirdest food you ate that you actually enjoyed?

    Nacho cheese Doritos in a chive and onion cream cheese bagel sandwich. Brush your teeth after this fine snack so you don’t gross anyone out.

6. What is one dream you have had that you wish could come true?  Alternate for people who can’t remember their dreams, how about a fantasy or day-dream?

    Daydream wise I would say just that everyone is healthy,financially secure,no more diseases,killing, racism,homophobia,nazis and pedos. That would be a great thing to happen. We’d all be happy, that may seem boring to some but hey I’ll take it.

7. You are now given exactly one “save point” in real life, and you can reload your save as many times as you want, but the one save point stands.  Where/when would you use it, if at all?  (retroactive answers, such as placing the save point somewhere in your past, are acceptable) 

   I would use it in the summer of 1996 just so I could keep reloading the cool times I had with friends, plus reliving the games, movies,music,fashion,the fads, etc....

8. In fantasy/”historical” war media (comics, games, whatever), do you prefer they use real-life countries (eg. Age of Empires, Kingdom Come: Deliverance, etc) or fictional countries (eg. Calradia in the Mount & Blade series, Temeria/Nilfgaard in The Witcher, etc)?  

   I really don’t have a preference on that tbh. Just as long the plot/gameplay is fun.

9. If you had infinite budget and nobody would make fun of you, 100% guaranteed, what is the most ridiculous outfit you would wear for Halloween?

   Taco Belle! Oh they could make fun of me all they want, my love for tacos kicks embarrassment’s ass any day!

10. What is your biggest guilty-pleasure in real life?  (eg. slowing down in front of tailgaters, acting dumb to frustrate rude customers, etc)

      Watching A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master b/c anyone else I know doesn’t care for that one in the Freddy series but it’s my favorite one to watch out of the whole series (despite the fact that it has the one insect I can’t deal with and that is roaches, go figure huh?) 

11. Why are you still on this shitty blue hellsite?

      Ah there’s the most important question of them all! Mutuals/friends do play a huge factor in my staying here b/c I have come across some really nice and awesome people on here that I enjoy conversing with. I also like some of the content, fan art, and edits ppl post on here in my favorite fandoms. Also my blog is more like a scrapbook of all the shit I like so whenever I get stressed or need a break, I like to go thru my archives to see the stuff I’ve reblogged whether it be recently or back when I first joined. It’s also neat to see how your tastes and views can change over time as well with looking back and forward. 

    This hellsite does have SOME good things about it in the sea of negativity, you just gotta look hard sometimes and the ppl you befriend along the way make it easier.

Alright that’s it! I’m supposed to make up 11 questions and tag 11 ppl with it? Afraid I’ll have to break that chain and not do it b/c of having less time to do so but if anyone wants to do this, just use these same questions and say I tagged you.