#close my eyes all day. slur my words. complain about how it hurts

[lavender---sunshine]

Im on hour 24 of this migraine and have stopped focusing on pain management type solutions and I'm looking more into how to let the unending pain fuel me to commit atrocities I would be too cowardly to otherwise

[makethemhoesmad]

shit you sippin

this took days off of my life to write but at least it’s over 1k words(for the first time ever)

@bueckersstrap was the chosen one

—

some people go to the club for fun. some people go to the club for sex. i needed to forget. get so drunk i didn’t have to think about my piece of shit ex boyfriend and the bitch i walked in on him fucking. i don’t know how many i’d had at this point, but i did know that i was grasped by the hips by an attractive blonde that i thought i knew but couldn’t figure out from where.

“you here for any reason tonight,” she shouts over the music.

“y-yeah i walked in on my boyfriend fucking some other girl,” i say. i try to keep the tremor out

of my voice, staying cool and collected, for the most part. i cock my at her, grinning. she takes my chin into her palm and tilts it up, making me look right into her eyes. my god, her eyes are driving me wild.

“you into girls, baby?”

i shudder at the nickname. collecting myself, i run a finger down her arm while stating, “never thought about it till now, but i just might be.”

“cmon,” she says, tugging my arm. “i’m taking you home with me, baby that alright with you?”

i stare in shock, nodding open-mouthed. she must’ve drank much less than i had, because she leads me out to what i can only guess to be her own car, and after opening the passenger door and helping me inside, she seems to be clear-headed enough to drive.

as she pulls out of the parking lot, i look over and realize who’s car i’m in, and why i recognized her face.

“wait! you’re paige bueckers,” i say, my words slurring together slightly.

“that’s right, baby. basketball fan?” 

i almost can’t answer her, all my remaining focus zoned in on her hand that is now resting on my thigh.

“mhmm,” i mumble. she rubs her thumb in slow circles on the inside of my leg. i let my head thump back against the car seat and close my eyes, only to open them a moment later when the car stops.

paige rushes out of her door to open mine, and i nearly fall flat on the ground when i climb out of the car. she pulls me into her, wrapping an arm around my waist to steady me. i zone out at the action, then trip over a doorframe and realize i’m in her bedroom.

“hey, baby, listen,” she says, sitting me on the bed and rummaging in her closet for something

“you’re, like, really drunk right now, but i really don’t wanna kick you out because i like you. so how ‘bout you put this t-shirt on and we talk about it in the morning?”

i nod, then reach back to try and unzip my dress. i can’t do it. could barely zip it up sober, so there’s no chance i can undo it in my inebriated state. i look up at paige with a pout, hoping that she’ll take pity on me. 

she unzips the dress, then helps me put on the t-shirt she gave me. she sheds her shorts and top, leaving her clad in only a bra and boxers. 

“god, fucking athletes,” i mutter, shamelessly raking my eyes down her body.

“what was that,” she asks, smirking. i turn red and she pulls me onto the bed with her, tucking us both under the covers. i curl my body into her, hiding my face in her chest.

“ ‘s nothing,” i say, the words muffled. she strokes a hand down my back and i whine gratefully, falling asleep almost instantly.

~

i wake up confused, sore, and with a boiling headache. i try to roll over, but find that i’m pinned under someone that, instead of smelling of beer and cheap cologne, smells like mint and aloe. shockingly, despite my headache i have a fairly decent recollection of last night’s events. as i’m realizing this, a few things happen. first, i realize exactly who’s bed i’m in and immediately try to free myself from her grasp out of pure embarrassment. second, the strong arms grasping me pull me down closer into the person they’re attached to. finally, said person nuzzles her nose into my neck, and says,

“how are you even prettier now?”

i push my face into the mattress

“ugh, liar. my fucking head, it hurts so bad. like, so, so bad,” i complain. she tries and fails to stifle her laugh.

“hey ma, i’m not sure if you’ve heard this, but i’ve been told head fixes headaches?” i blush, then realize she isn’t kidding when she pulls the covers off of us. she nestles her face in between my thighs, lifting her chin up to yank my panties down. 

“you okay, baby,” she questions, waiting for approval. i nod weakly, and she dives in, licking a stripe against my pussy.

“oh fuck,” i moan, my fingers curling around the bedsheets. she flicks her tongue at my entrance, causing my eyes to roll back. when she takes my clit into her lips, it’s all i can do to not release right then and there. 

“so good, so perfect,” she breathes while laying sloppy open mouthed kisses on my cunt. i fight to stay alert, but every bone in me wants to sink into oblivion, and when her moan vibrates my core, i do just that. i climax on her tongue, with her name on my lips, and if you had asked me my own damn name in that moment, i probably wouldn’t have been able to tell you. 

“how’s that head feeling, ma?” she asks. i look at her in dead shock.

“fucking gone, babe, how can i get you back? i’ve never, like, done it with girls before.”

she grins wickedly. 

“oh, baby i’ve got an idea.”

~

paige’s idea, it turns out, resulted in us not leaving her bedroom until 2 in the afternoon. when i finally checked my phone, i discovered not one, not two, but three missed calls from my now-ex boyfriend, and about a million texts telling me how sorry he was. i show paige, and she just about growls in frustration.

“lemme call him back,” she protests. i shake my head, turning to face her and letting her capture my lips into a kiss.

“pleease,” she whines against my lips. 

“fine.”

she opens my phone and pulls up the contact now only labeled with a gravestone emoji, and clicks the facetime. he answers almost immediately, to paige showing off our current position on her couch, under a blanket with me tucked into her side.

“stop textin her, bro. she’s mine now.”

he shouts profanities through the phone, but is aggressively cut off by paige kissing the top

of my head and saying, loud enough for him to hear, “it’s okay baby, now you can be with someone that can actually make you cum.”

he doesn’t like that, but i couldn’t care less.

[fe-fictions]

Got any old lon'qu fics you can upload, please? ;_;

(Of course! I have the morning after you and Lon'qu reunite from defeating Grima... we love ourselves a traumatized husband :'3 thanks again to @zankavogue ! )

You woke up first.

You were still adjusting to being in the real world, again.

Having returned to Lon’qu was an adventure in itself- you were reminded of all the hardships that came with being back on solid ground.

Namely, how freezing cold Ferox was, especially in the later months.

You were groggy, but felt nice and warm, which immediately registered in your mind as incorrect. Ferox wasn’t warm.

Then you realized you were in your old bed. In the home you had shared with Lon’qu, for two blissful years before the sacrifice. It had been three years longer until you were able to wake up in it again...which had happened only last night.

Still, you were far warmer than the heat from the many fires inside would provide.

There was a slow shift behind you, a heavy, relaxed exhale into your shoulder, and a lazy squeeze of arms around your body.

Ah.

Lon’qu.

You tilted your head back, finding a mop of spiky dark hair sticking up from where his face was nuzzled against you.

He had latched onto you for hours yesterday, since you had suddenly just popped up in the middle of the day with Chrom and Lissa. 

He hadn’t been expecting visitors...let alone his long lost love.

You could hear muffled sobs and scoldings when he engulfed you in his arms, unable to even acknowledge the royals laughing with you.

You were so overjoyed to be with Lon’qu again, and he was at a complete loss for words. Well, besides the garbled, joyful slur of mangled syllables when he tried to express how he was feeling with you in his arms again.

When things calmed down enough for him to thank Chrom and Lissa properly, they made a quick exit, insisting that you spend time with Lon’qu for a proper reunion.

The moment the door closed behind you, Lon’qu couldn’t bear to let you from his arms for a shadow of a second.

Oh, how sweetly he held you.

He made you swear over and over that you weren’t going anywhere, anymore. No more sacrifices. 

And you promised over and over that you were here. And you were going to work tirelessly to win back his trust. 

You knew how traumatic it had been to watch his beloved disappear before his eyes...for the second time. It should never have happened once. For him to relive that nightmare twice...it filled you with insurmountable guilt. He said he understood why you did it, and he had accepted the loss and come to terms with it.

But deep down, you knew he was very hurt, and raw. 

He had every right to be.

You would never complain about him holding onto you with every fiber of his being. You would let him cling to you ‘til the end of time, if it meant you could ease the pain he felt.

You snuggled back into him, encouraging your dearest to hug you closer. It was so cute- even in his sleep, his instinct was to hold you.

His grip tightened as you expected, making you grin to yourself. 

“My love…” You whispered, resting a hand on his forearm, which was crossed over your chest, giving him the soothing rhythm of your heartbeat.

You stroked his arm with an absentminded yawn. This was true bliss. 

“Hmngh.” Lon’qu’s morning growl. You felt it against your skin, and you giggled. “Mmr...Robin…?”

“Good morning, dear.” You gave his arm a little squeeze, “How are you?”

“You’re here.” He spoke for the first time that morning, voice as groggy and hoarse as ever. Ah, the memories it brought back. 

“I’m here.”

You turned in his arms, pressing your hands flat to his chest. Lon’qu’s voice remained sleepy, but his eyes were wide open. 

As if surprised you really were there with him. It was a lot to take in, after all. This was your first morning back together.

Your first real morning at home.

“You’re here.” He repeated, an unrecognizable emotion washing over his face. Like he was having trouble deciding what he was feeling more strongly; was it grief? Relief? Joy? Anxiety?

So many things, and for someone like Lon’qu, who could hardly express himself...it was quite clear that he was struggling to find where to land.

Your smile was sad, but you shifted to hold his face in your hands. “I’m here.”

“I…” He closed his mouth, swallowing thickly when he felt your touch. 

You were here.

“It’s okay.” You whispered, wiping away the silent tears. Lon’qu blinked rapidly, determined not to lose sight of you for even a moment.

“I was...s-scared you…” He looked away, hugging you tighter. “Scared it was a dre-eam.”

“It’s not a dream, Lon’qu.” You promised him, “Hey, sweetheart...hey.” 

You drew his gaze back with a gentle turn of his face, stroking his cheek tenderly.

“I’m home.”

Lon’qu bowed his head, sniffing loudly as his shoulders began to shake.

“Oh, darling…” Your laugh was quiet but filled with warmth. Your arms snaked around his neck, holding onto him as comfortingly as you could. Your poor Lon’qu needed all the TLC you could possibly give.

Your own exhaustion could wait. Right now, you had a precious, fragile husband you needed to take care of.

“I’m not going anywhere, Lon’qu. I’m here.”

“I’m…s-so glad.”

[faerykingdom]

DAY 6 ━ L. MORNINGSTAR

SYNOPSIS → in which you groom lucifer

WORD COUNT → 1724 words

WARNINGS → smut, wing grooming, femdom, crying, angst, little bit of wing neglect, basically lucifer doesn’t want to keep his wings in shape, and it causes him a little bit of pain

“Lucifer?” you called as you walked into your shared apartment above Lux. 

You hadn’t seen your husband all day, which was unusual considering you worked together. Plus, Lucifer usually clinged to you as if he was a lost puppy - not that you were complaining; you loved spending time with him. He was the love of your life after all. 

“Lucifer?” 

You walked up the steps leading to their bedroom, your heels marking your steps with a loud click. You were purposefully making your steps loud, you didn’t want to accidentally scare him, even though you were calling his name every few seconds.

“Lucifer, hun, are you here?” you said, gently pushing the door. 

You stood in the doorway, looking at your husband who was lying facedown on the bed, his arms clutching a pillow to his cheek. His eyes were closed, was he sleeping? He never sleeps this early.

Slowly you walked towards him, and sat down on a small part of the mattress that he wasn’t taking. 

You brought your hand up, and gently caressed his cheek, “Lucifer,” you whispered, “wake up, hun.” 

Lucifer, being the dramatic queen that he is, groaned loudly, and shoved his head into the pillow. “Go ‘way,” he slurred, his voice thick with sleep.

You couldn’t help but smile, you loved seeing him like this; tired, his walls - that he had spent thousands of years building - down. This was one of the times you saw him vulnerable, and you loved it. 

“It’s two in the afternoon, you need to wake up.”

“No.”

“Lucifer,” your voice dropped down into a warning growl. 

Immediately, he was jolting up, turning to face you. As he was sitting up, a grimace covered his face, but only for a minute. When he smiled his always charming smile, you almost thought that you had imagined it. 

“What time did you say it was, love?” Lucifer asked, his thick English accent laced with sleep still. 

You didn’t answer, instead watching your husband. Why had he grimaced? He hadn’t been injured. Well, not to your knowledge. And even if he was, he was immortal, shouldn’t he heal?

“Darling?” You brought up your hand, gripping his chin. He chuckled, nervous - why the hell was he nervous? -, “What are you doing, dear?”

“What am I doing?” you asked, a bit of an edge to your voice. “What are you doing, Lucifer?”

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t play stupid, hun,” you snapped. “You never sleep this late.”

“Well,” Lucifer started, moving to get out of your grip, but you only held him tighter. 

“And you flinched when you moved. I won’t ask again.”

You didn’t like pulling that card when he was obviously hurting, but sometimes he wouldn’t let anyone take care of him. He would let whatever it was bothering him fester, and would pretend as if he was fine. He wasn’t.

“Honestly, darling, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Lucifer!” 

Again, he tried to pull out of your grip, but he flinched, stopping almost immediately. 

What did he do to himself?

“Lucifer,” you whispered, “I can’t help if you won’t talk to me.”

“I-,” his face twisted, his eyes moving away from yours. Almost like he was ashamed. Still, you didn’t let him move away from you. You married this man, you love this man, and you would be damned if you let him pretend he was alright. 

“I-it’s my wings.” His eyes looked up at you from under his eyelashes, reminding you of a kicked puppy. 

“What’s wrong with your wings?”

“Well, they-they need to be groomed.”

You sighed, not out of disappointment or anger, but because you knew that he had been ignoring them. He hated his wings, still thinking that his father was tormenting him with them. How long had he been ignoring it?

“Lay down.”

Lucifer flinched again, “What?”

“Lay down.” Hesitantly, he laid down on his back. He wasn’t wearing a shirt, so it would be easy to start. You straddled his waist, both to keep him down, and so it would be easier to help him, “Come on, let me see.”

“Darling, really, I don’t think this is-”

“Lucifer, I’m not asking.”

He hesitated for another moment. You let your hand stroke down his back, “I’m not going to hurt you, hun. I just want to help.”

He sighed, “If you insist.”

A moment later, his beautiful wings popped out. You had seen them more times than you could count. Every time you had seen them, the feathers had been straight, and clean - but now they were disarrayed, feathers crooked and some broken. Dirt was covering almost every single feather, and you could see dirt under his feathers.

No wonder he was in pain. 

“Honey,” you whispered.

Lucifer whined, squirming underneath you. “Honestly, Detective, I can do it,” he muttered, his face shoved into his pillow again.

“Then why haven’t you?” you snapped. “Your wings have obviously been hurting for far longer than you wish for me to believe. How long have you been ignoring it, Lucifer?”

He didn’t respond, instead burrowing his head further into the pillow. If he wasn’t immortal, you would’ve worried that he would suffocate himself. 

You stared at the back of his head, silently urging him to talk. This was the one thing that you struggled with in your marriage. Sure, you had only been married for a year and three months, but you had known Lucifer for almost a decade. 

Ever since you had met him, he had struggled with communicating. Yes, Linda helped, but habits can’t be stopped so easily, especially when you've been doing it for thousands of years. 

“Lucifer.”

Again, he whines, desperately trying to disassociate.

“Lucifer, answer me.” He whispers into the pillow so quietly that you can’t make out what he said. “You need to speak up, I can’t hear you.”

“Three months.”

You froze.

Three months.

For three months your husband has let his wings become a ruin. For three months he’s been in pain.

“Why?” you whispered, the heartbreak clear in your voice. “Why would you do this to yourself?”

“Because I hate them!” Lucifer shouts, his hands turning into fists in the sheets. “My bloody father forced them on me! The stupid bastard just wants to control me! I won’t let him!”

You watched as he broke down, his eyes shining a bright red, and tears leaking down his face. But even as he raged, he didn’t try and move out from under you, didn’t try and put his wings away. He just screamed and yelled, cried and weeped. 

You didn’t know how long he yelled for, you didn’t care much either, but he finally calmed down. His chest heaving, and his usually tamed hair disarrayed. 

“Lucifer, I know that you hate your wings, but that doesn’t mean you should ignore them when they’re hurting you.” He opened his mouth, most likely to say something snarky, but you cut him off, “No! I don’t want to hear it! If your wings start hurting, talk to me. I’ll help.”

He laid there, his cheek resting on the pillow so he could look up at you. His eyes were clouded with shock, and confusion. You didn’t know why he would be confused. 

“Now,” you sighed, “what do I do first?” He was silent, still staring up at you. “Lucifer, what do I do?”

He sighed, resignation written all over his face, “Fix the wings,” he muttered. “Straighten them, and pull out the broken ones.”

Immediately, you started running your fingers through his feathers, straightening the feathers. Every once in a while you found broken ones, and gently pulled them out. Lucifer didn’t say anything, instead going back to hiding his head in the pillow. Sometimes, he would tense - which sent you into a panic thinking that you hurt him - or would whine. You didn’t question it, you knew that Lucifer didn’t want to talk. 

Once you had finally straightened the feathers on both of his wings, you sat back on your haunches, “What now, hun?”

“Y-you have to-to clean the dirt,” he stammered. 

“Are you alright?” you asked, bringing your hands up to run through his hair. 

He cleared his throat, “Yes, Detective. You have to clean it with water. Can we please get this over with?”

You didn’t respond, instead, you got up and got a bowl of water. When you came back in the room, Lucifer hadn’t moved so much as an inch. 

Slowly, you started to clean the dirt out from his feathers. You had decided to wash him with your fingers instead of a towel. 

The two of you sat in silence. 

You were nearing the tip of his wing, and you had to slightly dig your fingers in to get the dirt all out. 

Lucifer gasped, his hips bucking underneath you. You froze, “Did I hurt you?”

“N-no, Detective, keep going.” 

You watched him as you forced the dirt out. His hands were fists, the sheet wrapped tightly around his knuckles. Tears were steadily falling down his cheeks. At first, you felt the panic rise in you, going to withdraw from him, but then you felt his hips thrusting under you. 

You were quiet for a moment, simply watching, before you rubbed your thumb in tight circles. Lucifer cried out, his hips stuttering, and his knuckles turning white.

You felt a smirk creep up your lips, “Does that feel good, pretty boy?”

“Y-yes,” he gasped, drool dripping out of his open mouth and falling on the bed. 

Slowly, you ran your fingers along the skin of his wings, and circled your thumb. You watched as your husband lost his mind; his hips bucked wildly, he frantically shook his head, and his nails were ripping holes in the sheets. 

You bent over him, pressing gentle kissing along his spine, and neck. You dragged your lips up to his ear,  “Come on, love, come for me,” you whispered. 

His body tensed under you, and his mouth dropped open in a silent scream. 

Gently, you held him to your chest, holding him as he fell from his peak. You whispered sweet nothings in his ear. You watched as his eyes slowly started to flutter close in exhaustion, “Did that wear my baby out?” you chuckled and pressed one last kiss on his neck, “Sleep, my love.”

tagging: @just-a-smol-spoon​

[shockinglysubmissive]

Kinktober Day 15: Somophilia

Day 15: Somophilia- Kenma x Fem!Reader

WARNINGS: Dom!Reader, Squirting

You found yourself growing bored of the tapping and muttering of your boyfriend as he stressed over his stocks.

“Kenma. Give it a rest. You have been working on them for hours. Sleeping for a little while won’t hurt anything. If anything, you will wake up and be able to focus even more.” You get his attention by throwing a small pillow at the back of his head. The pillow scares him, snapping him out of his focused state.

“I thought you fell asleep.” He mumbles, picking up the pillow and heading to sit next to you in bed.

“No. I can’t sleep. I haven’t gotten any good dick in days.” You complain, tossing your head back and batting your eyes at him.

“Didn’t you just tell me you want me to sleep? I don’t think you can have both.” He points out, poking your forehead. Your nose wrinkles as you think of a response. Suddenly, it clicks.

“You can sleep. And I can get to use your dick until I can’t cum anymore.” You push him to lay on his back, straddling his lap and tugging his sweatpants down.

"Hm? Kinky. You want to use my unconscious body to make yourself cum?" He doesn't push you off of him, letting you continue what you have planned. Your hands work his shaft slowly, coaxing more blood to flow to his growing member.

“Just close your eyes. Drift off to sleep. I will take good care of you.” You lean forward to let your lips brush his ear. The soft bedding underneath him, and your hand pulling soft moans from his lips, he finds it harder to stay awake.

Eyes focused on the slow rise and fall of his chest, you finally trust he has fallen asleep. Slipping your panties aside, you ease yourself down, letting your pussy swallow his long and slender cock.

All the pent up desire from not getting any stimulation for days finally flows to your core. Your hands rest on the sides of his head as you slowly lift yourself up and drop yourself down. It only takes a few bounces to have your slick dripping down to length.

Soft groans slip past his partially opened lips which push you to increase your pace. Your hips grind against his, stimulating your clit with every thrust.

Seeing the way his fully relaxed body still responds to the sensation of you pussy clenching around him reminds you how helpless he is under you. You have full control over the pleasure that you both feel and he can do nothing to stop you if he becomes sensitive.

You can’t help but wonder what he is dreaming about, if he is imagining the exact scene that is happening in the real world. Whatever it was, he was clearly enjoying it. You could feel the tell-tale sign that he was close, his balls tightening as he cock twitches deep inside you.

Feeling him cum doesn’t slow you down, instead it encourages you to move faster, chasing your own high as the sleeping male beneath you begins to stir. You move your hands to his chest, keeping a gentle hold on him to keep him from moving.

“A-ah. I…” His words slur as white hot pleasure courses through his entire body everytime you drop yourself fully onto him. Your fluttering walls milking his sensitive cock head, dragging every inch of him across the spongey spot inside you.

“Sh-shut up. Cumming… not going to stop.” You whimper, thighs burning from the speed you have picked up. Fluid gushes out of you and soaks his dick. Nails dig into his shirt, half pulling your body to continue spearing yourself on him, and half keeping you grounded and your orgasm overwhelms you.

“Stop… or… at least slow down. I can’t cum again.” Your boyfriend’s voice is nothing more than a groggy whine. His words fall on deaf ears. After squirting for him once, you can’t stop. You need to feel more.

One of your hands snakes to his mouth, pressing your ring and middle finger down on his tongue to pacify him. His lips close around your fingers, soothing his whimpers.

“I’m gonna cum again and again. You will cum as many times as it takes for me to finally be satisfied. So make things easier for yourself. Suck my fingers and enjoy the feeling as you go back to sleep.” You move closer to his face, showing him how serious you are. He nods slowly, tears brimming in his eyes.

Taking pity on the half asleep, slightly trembling man below you, your pace slows down to rock against him. You keep this new pace until you can see he is nearly unconscious again. Your free hand snakes down and cups his cum soaked balls.

Knowing how he cups them when he makes himself cum, you do the same, hoping it makes the orgasm in his dreams even better.

You can feel them tighten in your hand as more of his cum floods into you. The erotic sight of his sleeping for, sweaty and cum covered, partnered with the pulsing member inside you lets you know that you won’t be done cumming anytime soon.

[legendaryoikawa]

haikyuu boys and your moments with them

note: female reader insert

warnings: tooth rooting fluff, slightly nsfw, mentions of alcohol, some grammar issues because I didn’t proofread this, sorry 😔

starring: bokuto, semi, matsukawa, tsukishima, sakusa, kageyama and goshiki

thank you for 1,7k!!!

bokuto kotaro: unplanned dates + things he do for you

“hey hey hey babe”

“why?”

“let’s go on a date, i miss u”

The little moments with bokuto is something that you will never forget. Those unplanned dates with just him in his sweats and unruly hair. Those date with him at the park with just him lying on your lap, admiring your face with a cheeky smile painting his lips. Or the way his hands playfully trace small circles on your lap playfully.

Those moments with him that’ll make you neglect your schoolworks in an instant because he pulled out a shenanigan on you (with the help of akaashi, so it’ll look convincing that bokuto is really in pain, but surprise bitch, it’s a prank) but truth is he just want to see your face because volleyball has consumed his time. And you’ll just smack him off for scaring you but he’d just kiss you in return. Kisses that are too strong with passion and desire. He gives more to the point you would be drowning with his passionate spirit.

You love it when he does this small thing where he tugs your stray away hair behind your ear. You always ask him why, but instead of answering your inquiry, he’ll just pull out a bouquet of handpicked flowers from the park and will hand to you.

“You ask why? Is it wrong to admire how absolutely stunning you are?”

sjDJHDBJSB DEAD

semi eita: when he invited you to a nearby gig

beautiful boy invited you and you thought you were just dreaming so he flicked you on your forehead 🥰💀

One thing that you should be taking with you especially when you’re going for a gig is a fucking jacket. Regardless of the event being indoors or outdoors, a fucking jacket is a must.

But you might be someone who lives under the rocks and decided to wear a full glam without taking a jacket to warm you off.

Yet, the night is already starting. Night sky is deep with velvety clouds and twinkling stars. Going back would be such a pain and Semi might be annoyed if you’d pull out a grand entrance because you’re so late. Heaving a sigh, you pulled over the venue where the gig is at. You saw him at the entrance with his signature grey hair styled perfectly and his hands stuffed into his jeans.

He gave you a quick look. “Hey.”

You let out a breath, “hey.”

You noticed that there were no people. No noise. Hell, there weren’t a gig to start with. “Semi?”

“I know. But this is the only thing i could pull of just so i could ask you on a date.”

sakusa kiyoomi: when you know you both share mutual feelings but there is something holding both of you back

you and sakusa both know you share some deep seated feeling towards each other yet neither both of you decided to talk about it.

you fell hard for him even more when you were dead shit drunk (yet, you are still aware of everything around you, however you have the guts to act carelessly even around sakusa) and you decided to tease him by sitting on his lap, when you barged into his dorm room after going hom from a sorrority party.

It really took him by surprise at how vulgar you are with your words. How straightforward you were around him. When in reality when you’re sober, you’d never dare to talk to him, let alone straddling on his lap. Or the way you look at him slowly beneath your lashes. No matter how hard sakusa tries to shut his thoughts, but he wishes to see more of this side of you.

He could smell the reek of alcohol on your breath yet he made no complains whatsoever because it’s you. It’s fucking you. And, he’ll never throw a fit even if it disturbs his personal confort zone, because it’s you that we are talking about here. And, you are in a state of vulnerability because of alcohol, now isn’t a time for him to be a brat about hygiene or whatever.

You whispered, “why are you such a stone, sakusa?”

He didn’t quite understand what you meant by that, but he chose to shut up and stare at your deep, tired eyes. Those eyes that captivated him. Those eyes of yours that he wishes to stare more at.

“I like you so much,” you slurred. “You and your bitchiness about people around you. Y-you..” you paused, shifting yourself comfortably on his lap while you gripped on his shoulders.

Sakusa could hear his own frantic heartbeat. Did you really mean it? But he knows, every shit that a drunk says, is nothing but the truth.

“I l-like you l, ya know that?” You grinned and tumbled but sakusa was fast enough to hold you on you waist. He burried his face onto the crook of you neck and whispered but loud enough for you to hear, “i like you too, but you’re disgusting right now.”

The next day was a beautiful disaster. With him and you in bed.

tsukishima kei: a study date with him at the library

having kei as your tutor could be really cold but what choice do you have?

Kei isn’t the type to sugarcoat things just because he wanted to be the type to give sympathy. But no. He will lash out if your essay is shit and he’ll even rub it onto your face that your choice of words aren’t passing his high standards. Not even a bit. That is how Kei is.

Yet, he knows when to stop with his venomous words. Especially when he knows you were having a bad day and so he decided to act more docile so he wouldn’t hurt more of your feelings.

Study dates with him isn’t too romantic because he prioritizes both of your academic success. But there will be time where he will let you snuggle close to him when the library’s air condition is making you cold. Or when he lets you doodle little dinosaurs on his forearms while he watches you under his stern, golden eyes.

“Why do you keep on playing with my hair? You should be studying your biology, dumbo.” He isn’t annoyed. In fact, he doesn’t want you to stop, he’s just too tsundere to admit.

But you know it well that he loves it so you play with his locks even more while leaning over to place a chaste peck on his cheeks.

Kei flipped his book and whispered. “Why do I love a fucking goner?”

kenma kozume: when he immediately hugged you after his stream

Kenma isn’t the type to be suave with words. But he expresses his affection through action because according to kuroo, that is much more cool.

He just finished a stream and gave away his honest review on how this palace dungeon game is. But is didn’t fazed him at all. In fact, he didn’t liked the graphics at all. A solid five for gamer!kenma

What made him scared is that it is already eleven in the evening yet you were nowhere to be found.

But his anxiousness subsided when he heard the familiar clanking of the front bell. And there you stood at the door, looking gloomy and kenma made sure to act up immediately.

It took you by surprise when he stood up from his seat and immediately wrapped you around his body. The familiar whiff of his cologne mixed with his warmth. This is more than you asked for.

kuroo tetsurou: when he makes fun of you because he likes you so much

King of provocation and chemistry nerd kuroo always love to mess up with you. And you can’t find a way to get to him back or?

“You know what?” Kuroo began.

You raised a brow, “what?”

“You’re small.”

“You’re just tall, Kuroo. Now,” you raised a pencil towards his direction, “leave me alone.”

Kuroo clicked his tongue. Now is the time for him to continue on further to pester you. He isn’t being a jerk though, but he just finds it cute especially when you get agitated with just him and his presence. The way your fist curling and he can’t help but to admire your annoyed face. You’re so damn cute but you just don’t even notice the notable fucking obvious.

Kuroo decided to play with your hair but you had other things in mind. To get back at him just for him to get a taste of his own medicine.

You exerted a lot of effort to pull his collar down just to match you eye level with his. You smiled, “is it just playing with my hair that you could pull off, kuroo?”

You’re donw with him concealing his feeling because he has no guts to come up to you. So you did him a favor. Something that’ll distract him for the rest of his day.

matsukawa issei: 3am dance with him

You were washing the dishes at night when you felt two strong arms encircling your waist.

“Hey.”

Matsukawa’s arms encircled your waist as you washed the dishes one Thursday night. The way he hummed the familiar tune of ‘close to you’ while swaing both of your bodies gracefully. You missed him, especially his familiar scent that smelled like home.

He shuffled his feet so he could have more grasp on the hem of your shirt. His thumb caressed the soft skin that showed from his hold.

You grabbed the sponge and lathered it with soap as Matsukawa clinged onto you. It was a peaceful night, with him on your side, the splashing of water and the sound of his lips kissing the crook of your neck.

You smiled as his kisses grow more playful. But Matsukawa wanted to see your face and so he twirled you so he could plant a kiss onto your lips.

You grinned. “Well, well, well, fancy seeing you here Mister Matsukawa.”

He gave you a cheeky smile back, “well, well, well, too, it was a pleasure seeing your beautiful face, Mrs. Matsukawa.”

You decided to play along with him as he swayed both of your bodies in a slow dance. “I doubt. You have plenty of companions at work, right?”

“Oh please. Among all that I’ve seen, i will always choose you.”

kageyama tobio: late night dates with him at the downtown convenience store

He would act like he just wanted milk but truth is, he wanted you more than the milk he’s addicted to.

“You’re such a dumbass, y/n.” Kageyama scolded when you tripped on your feet but good thing he was there to catch you. He resisted the urge to smile as you gave him a cheeky smile and brushed off the incident like it didn’t cut your self esteem. Humiliation? You don’t know her.

You immediately plopped onto the familiar stool of the convinience store after you grabbed ome of your favorite sponge cakes.

“Stop eating the poor cake like there is no tommorow, baka”

You made a face. “Call me a glutton, but these are the best among all sponge cake made.”

Kageyama raised a brow. Confused, he leaned in but you raised the empty container to his face. You suppresed a laugh, “Told you, I’m a glutton.”

He frowned. “I really don’t need to take a bite of that cake just to have a taste.”

“Wha—?”

He kissed you. And you were right. The sponge cakes were tasty.

goshiki tsutomo: walking home with him from the late academy

Nothing’s more enjoyable than having goshiki’s presence with you after going home from a hellish class from the academy.

“I am the future ace! You heard that, y/n?” Goshiki proudly yelled while both of you were walking home from the supplemental classes. You tried to match his energy. Yet, no matter how hard you try, you were just too drained to yell with him.

Goshiki had managed to read you even when you didn’t said it to his face. No words were needed because he knows you well like you were his very own diary. He pulled you by your cardigan to enclose you in his lean body.

He heard him whisper as he burried his nose on your hair. “You can always rely on me, idiot. If you’re tired, then tell me so i could somehow make you happy.”

—

Hello!! Sorry if this was tOO LONG I GOT CARRIED AWAY HAHAHAHAHHA but i hope you enjoyed this as much as i enjoyed writing it!! Also, thank you for 1,7K U GUYS ARE THE BEST! Love you all!! 🥺💖💖💖

[anyoneseenadam]

Healing

pairing: Azriel x reader (acotar)

warnings: TW - sexual assault, rape, objectification and implications of abuse, smut, consensual sex, azriel is a sweetie and rhys is a good bestie

a/n: first of all PLEASE READ THE WARNINGS!!! i’m really proud of this fic but I don’t want to trigger or upset anyone, that being said it isn’t too graphic but still. Anyway I hope u enjoy, this took me three days lmao <333

based on: this and this

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You had your first less than savoury encounter with men when you had barely turned nine. Your body still hadn’t finished forming, but you were growing, and your body was gaining some semblance of shape as you did. It wasn’t much – just a whistle from across the street – but for a second your heart seized up with fear, and in the next you almost felt giddy. A man thought you were beautiful.

You felt like a princess that day – felt the way you had when the boy from your class had kissed your cheek, still too young to process the intentions behind that single whistle. But you didn’t care – someone wanted you.

When you got your first period at twelve – even more changed. Your body felt new, and you didn’t feel comfortable in the changes. Your old clothes didn’t fit and now your mother forced you into tighter corsets for those long, long dinners you had to attend. Your parents were respected Fae in the Hewn City – nobles who liked to drink and smoke and throw extravagant balls. And with your new body you could no longer simply hide in the corner or climb through secret passages with your friends – muddying your dresses.

Now you had to smile when men hugged you slightly too long, laugh when they commented on how much you had grown up, sit pretty and pristine with an old mans hand loitering to close to your rear for hours as you watched your parents drink away their troubles.

By the time you were fifteen you were used to the constant attention, your beauty not uncommon where you lived but still doted on often. Unaware of their desire for your youth, your naivety. The women never offering a helping hand but instead glaring down high skewed noses as their husbands slurred into your ears – still in shock that a pretty, young thing like you was all alone at this party.

When you were sixteen you decided to change that – kissing an alright looking boy at a party and telling him exactly what he wanted to hear so he would kiss you back. He stayed when you didn’t protest as he pulled you to the bathroom and pushed you to your knees. And for this small request, the greasy hands on your body at balls and dinners or any other social gathering halved – now only the truly self-righteous felt they could touch you still.

The only problem was you truly did love the boy you had chosen. He had faults yes, but he was kind – he brought you flowers and kissed your cheek. But he also spoke over you, forced you into silence and took what he wanted. And he always wanted the same thing.

If anything it was his father’s fault. The military commander never leaving room for debate when he argues with his wife – and sons only become what they see in their fathers.

Your father had left with a younger woman a few months after your fourteenth birthday, and you hadn’t seen him since – only heard stories of him galivanting around the autumn court from your classmates. You could see the distaste your mum held you in as she realised she would have to stick around to look after you, not yet old enough to be married. Then Amarantha had taken hold of the country and that possibility had been thrown out the window anyway.

Weirdly enough not that much changed in your life when she took power, the only major difference was that now you had to block out screams before going to sleep and even they had become like white noise. You still drank with your friends on Friday nights, went out with your boyfriend on Saturdays and slept the pain away on Sundays. Your weekdays consisted of school, dinners, balls and whatever more your mother could throw together to appease the high queen.

That and the high lord of the night court had started making appearances at the events your mother threw. He was a cruel man standing so proudly at the queen’s side – but you saw something flickering in his eyes whenever people spoke, complimenting his power and rule. You saw what you felt as you laughed at compliments and lingering touches – you saw pain, but more importantly you saw anger. And right now you could use anger.

During one ball you watched him leave, taking an odd route – not the one that would help him escape the loud music but instead a long winding corridor leading to a series of smaller rooms. Without thought you peeled away from your company, muttering excuses and went after him – grabbing a bottle of wine as you did.

You found him reclining in an empty room and knocked on the door gently. He cracked open an eye – slow like a cat – and beckoned you in. You moved to perch next to him, leaning back with a straight back and letting your head loll slightly as you took a swig of the dark red wine, before passing him the bottle.

“You looked like you could use a drink,” you smiled, eyes focused on his sharp jaw as he held the bottle to his mouth with a laugh.

“One way of putting it,” he smiled. The two of you sat in silence for several minutes as you took in his beauty, his looks plus mannerisms all made him seem like a wild cat - a panther trapped underground.

“Why are you here?” he finally asked, and you raised a hand to trace that sharp jaw. But instead of devouring you as any lesser man would’ve, he brushed your hand away and held it tightly in his larger one. “That’s not gonna happen, you’re what sixteen?”

“Almost seventeen,” you said, cheekily. He laughed but shook his head, squeezing your hand before releasing it.

“You’re still a child,” he said matter-of-factly, and you scoffed, stealing your wine back to drink again.

“Yeah well that’s usually a selling point,” your voice was sad, but you didn’t dare let your eyes stray from his – refusing to show fear, “And you’re so nice to me, I wouldn’t tell anyone.”

He laughed as you pouted, “You practice this in the mirror or something?”

“Usually works in three seconds,” you confess, and he whistles under his breath, “Men are rather easy to manipulate when they’ve been trying to get into your skirts since your first bleed.”

“And you wonder why I’m not about to take advantage of you,” he laughed, and you smiled – a real smile, or real enough. “Plus I don’t think your little boyfriend would be pleased.”

“Eh, he’s never pleased - I don’t think this could make him worse.” Rhysand took the wine back and frowned.

“Does he hurt you?” his voice was sincere but the laugh you let out was not.

“Don’t all men,” he swore, and you laughed again, “Yet you foil my plan to make you fall in love with me and whisk me away to the moon.”

He laughed, but his eyes darkened with deep sadness you were sure you would never understand, “I think we both no that even I could not do that, but I might be able to crush your fly.”

“Little boyfriend? Fly? You really don’t like him do you?” you laughed, head lighter already.

“I don’t like any man who thinks they can hurt women,” he said, frowning when he realised through your passing back and forth there was no wine left.

“Shit that took us like five minutes,” you complained, and he laughed, waving his hand lightly as several more bottles appeared before you – you grinned as you grabbed another.

“So any friends with weaker moral backbones that I could marry?” you asked with a laugh, and he smiled at you.

“I’m sure I could find someone,” he leaned back again. You smiled – finally happy that one night might pass in the company of a decent man.

Soon, you’d find it would be more than one night, a close friendship quickly blossoming between you and the high lord. All your friends were convinced you were sleeping together but true to his word he didn’t touch you, and by the time you surpassed the age of eighteen you didn’t want him to. But that didn’t stop other men.

After a particularly bad argument with your boyfriend that had left you with a handprint on your left cheek you had broken up with him – sending away his apologies and flowers, smart enough to see he didn’t hold the mental capacity to change.

Plus you were beautiful and young, you could certainly do better. And you soon did – rich men who liked to buy you jewellery, and fine clothes, men who enjoyed literature and art and spending time with you.

And at the start of each relationship, for a few blissful seconds you would believe in their pure intentions. But then a hand would drift from your lower back to your ass, or the gentle kiss that followed a necklace would shift from your mouth to your breasts. Not one of them wanted to wait until you were comfortable, so you made yourself comfortable.

You pictured pretty, strong men were holding you down and making you feel something, slipping your own hand between your legs and they penetrated you to try and replicate what you were sure a lover’s touch must feel like. And as always – after the first time- they stopped asking for permission, you were their toy, so you no longer had choice over that part of yourself.

But through nice guys and bad boys, for fifty years you had Rhysand who was a friend – who treated you with respect and finally let you talk, let you breathe.

In the end he was the one who found you, in the backroom of a party – drunk and undressed. You were weeping, curled in a ball with your attackers’ seed dripping out of you, bruises decorating your bare skin. When he turned you over with his comforting hands he found your nose dripping red and the vibrant lipstick you wore smudged.

He helped you sit up and redress, took you home and stood outside the bathroom while you scrubbed yourself clean in scalding water – still unsteady on your feet. You changed into a nightgown silently and neither of you said a word when you crawled into bed next to each other, crying in your best friends’ arms as he tried to console you.

When you woke up, he was gone with just a scribbled message about Amarantha and the name of a healer he trusted. But you just placed it back down, turning onto your back and staring at the ceiling as hot tears ran into your hairline.

You barely ate anything for the days following your assault – fighting with your mother more when you rarely saw her and subsequently breaking it off with your current boyfriend. You had thrown his hands off you when he tried to touch you and the screaming match that followed ended your relationship.

Your bond with Rhysand grew only closer however as you spent nights drinking in candlelight, talking about anything and everything until you were sure he knew every inch of your soul and you his.

“You know what I’m going to do as soon as she’s gone,” you whispered one night as you stared at the twinkling lights you had hung on your bedroom roof to imitate stars.

“What?” Rhys had asked, never letting his eyes leave the ‘stars’ which he had laughed at and then proceeded to rearrange to make them more accurate. To which you threw a pillow at his head.

“Find a hill, or a pier, or a large pit or anything and scream into it until my throat bleeds.” You said and he laughed, the bed beneath you rumbling.

“Consider me on board.” He joked as you sat up to perch at your vanity – smudging the sharp eyeliner you wore with a small brush and applying some red lipstick.

“Wanna go out?” you asked him, and he sat up to with a small, sad smile.

“Can’t.” you understood his implication and frowned.

“I’m honestly surprised she hasn’t gutted me yet,” you tried to lighten the mood, but his face darkened slightly when he joked back.

“Oh she wants to, I’m telling her any information you give me about citizens, so she doesn’t.” He said, ruffling your hair as he stood to leave.

“That’s fair, I’ll keep an ear out,” you smiled, squeezing his hand gently before he left.

Things changed when Feyre Archeron appeared, you saw the way your friend watched her and realised you might be competing for his attention soon, but you were happy for him. Until he brought her to that first party – drugged and barely dressed. You felt the bile rise in your throat as you pushed down memories of yourself in such a similar position, and while you knew he would never hurt her – he was still a man. And you were foolish to believe for all those years that he was a man who would realise this was wrong.

Making polite excuses you left the party, picking up the tails of your dress as you all but raced home – ditching the dress and closing the blinds tightly as you made yourself food in your underwear. The sick feeling in your throat spreading through your chest and stomach as you ate, abandoning your meal halfway for a book and large sweater. And when he knocked on your door that night, desperate to tell you all about her – all about the human girl who he was sure could be his mate, you pretended to be asleep.

You barely spoke to him the whole time she was there, unable to look him in the eyes when she was so clearly out of it – and the feeling only grew when the next morning she would have all eyes on her. You understood that feeling. You instead spent parties flirting with Tarquin, the young high lord who was only a few years your senior or warding off marriage invitations with laughs and carefully placed words.

Rhys would sometimes catch your eyes – furrowing his eyebrows at you when you avoided his gaze, the sick feeling never really leaving. But it wasn’t until you watched Tamlin slay Amarantha with a smile that he tried to speak to you again. Feyre was Fae and leaving with her betrothed and Rhysand had just confirmed they were mates – and never had he needed his best friend quiet like he did now.

You were sitting when he found you, head in your palms and blood dusting the skirts of your dress. You had been sitting near Amarantha when it happened. You looked up when he neared, smiling sadly as he sat next to you.

“Want to go home?” he asked you quietly and you scoffed, standing, and moving to leave quickly. He followed after you, grabbing your arm as you wrenched it out of his grip with more ferocity than he had ever seen from you.  

“Don’t touch me,” he held his hands up, backing away to give you space as you got your breathing under control.

“What did I do?” he asked – smart enough to not presume anything.

“How could you think it was okay, after what happened?” your voice was quiet again, and so sad.

“I don’t know what you mean,” he implored, stepping slightly closer again. You raised your eyes to meet his and he understood, the darkness you carried in your eyes shining through – the memories that resurfaced in those dark moments. “I’m sorry, let me explain please.”

You let him hold your arm softly as he winnowed the two of you to your house where you sat down heavy and tired.

“I did it because she needed out of that cell, but I saw what they did to you and you’re a fae woman, she’s… she was human. So it meant that no one else would touch her.” He tried to explain, “And she wouldn’t want to remember.”

“That’s a horrible thing to do Rhys.” You stated and he hung his head low, “How in anyway was that helping her, to get her out you could’ve snuck her here or just take her to a ball and let her dress normally.”

“I’m sorry, I just knew this would’ve been the safest option,” he grabbed your hand again and squeezed it like he did all those years ago, “It’s over, we can go home.”

“I am home,” you laughed bitterly, gesturing to your house.

“No, you’re coming out of this city – we’re putting it behind us.” He stood and held out a hand.

“I know you’re trying to be dramatic and all, but I have to pack – and think.” You said and he laughed.

“Take your time,” he said, sitting back to wait for you, “And I know it might take you a while to forgive me, but I’ll wait.”

You had left soon after, as he revealed his city to you. Winnowing to a house where two beautiful women stood at the door, strong winged men appearing next to them almost instantly – all sharing the same tear-eyed look. Well, all asides from a short, dark-haired woman who simply smiled.

The men you presumed were Azriel and Cassian barrelled towards Rhysand, attacking him in the most violent hug you had ever witnessed. Mor followed soon after and Amren simply offered him a curt nod, to which he bowed slightly with a cheeky smile.

Cassian turned to look at you and everyone followed suit, you straightened up – not wanting to cower under their gazes.

“And this, this is (y/n).” Rhysand said, placing a hand on your elbow, “She’s the only reason I survived under the mountain.”

You smiled at him, annoyed still – but you still held so much love for him in your heart. You looked away when Cassian approached and wrapped you in a tight hug, lifting you off the ground slightly.

When he released you he looked you dead in the eye, “I am forever in your service.”

“Cassian let go of the poor girl,” Mor exclaimed behind him, and you giggled, looking to Rhys for support.

“Forgot to tell you he’s a hugger,” he shrugged, and you shoved his shoulder.

“Oh did you!”  you laughed.

“Gotta get used to it, you’re part of the team now,” Cassian slung an arm around your shoulder as he guided you inside, “which means lots of hugs and long talks about emotions.”

“Don’t steal my best friend Cassian,” Rhys jabbed at his brother as you all moved to sit inside around a long table.

“He already had I’m afraid, can’t reverse love like ours,” you joined in, patting Cassian’s hand as he punched the air in victory, Rhysand feigning pain as he dramatically collapsed into his chair – a hand over his heart.

When you were finally seated you caught Azriel’s gaze, his eyes locked on you – having watched you interact with his family for less than five minutes and already completely enamoured. You smiled softly when you caught his gaze and he grinned at you, no words passing.

Later that evening – after too many drinks, you found yourself alone on a balcony you found, drinking in the fresh air greedily after all those years underground. You didn’t realise he was there until he was next to you – silent on his feet, his shadows a cool chill passing over your shoulders.

You tilted your head to look at him, in awe of his beauty. Not even Rhysand had awed you as much as this man was, his beauty unparalleled by anyone you had met before. He turned his gaze down to you as well, fighting the urge to reach out and touch you as he watched you move with such elegant curiosity.

“We haven’t had the pleasure of being formally introduced,” you smiled, lifting your hand delicately, “I’m (y/n).”

He met your hand halfway, lifting it to his mouth with perfectly poised and trained grace. “Azriel,” his voice was deep, gruff – and sent chills through you quickly. But when he moved your hand from his mouth you held on, the sparks flowing through you telling you all you needed to know. He similarly made no move to let go.

“Are we? I don’t really know how any of this works,” you laughed nervously but he smiled so warmly and tugged you slightly closer to him with the hand you were still clutching.

“You’re my mate princess,” he said, voice rough from disuse. You smiled widely, eyes forming tears as your gaze never strayed from him – finally getting one person who would truly love you, not your body – but you. He tugged your hand gently and you followed him inside, smiling and love drunk.

“We should probably go to the house of wind,” his voice was quiet as you furrowed your eyebrows at him.

“Me and Cassian have to share a room here, the bed are singles.” You smiled and laughed – irrevocably happy.

“Yeah maybe not,” you said, and he held your hand softly as he walked you to the front door, passed his past out friends, Rhys cracking an eye open when you walked past him, and you turned when he tugged your skirt gently.

You okay? He asked in your mind, and you smiled at him.

I’m perfect, why? You replied as he closed his eyes again, clearly too tired to hold them open - Azriel moving to retrieve your coats.

Just don’t feel pressured into doing anything you’re not ready for, Azriel is understanding he won’t get angry. A sort of cold feeling settled on your shoulders when you realised why Azriel wanted that extra privacy.

Shit forgot I had to do that you joked but Rhysand felt the stress growing, however before he could reply Azriel was by your side again and you were waving him goodbye, your smile tight lipped.

Honestly, you trusted Rhysand when he said that Azriel would understand – but so far you had yet to meet a man who truly respected the boundaries you set, a man who would truly wait. Azriel met your eyes in silent questions before scooping you into his arms, flying high above the house as you squealed in his arms, clinging tightly to his neck, and shutting your eyes tightly as you soared above the vibrant city.

He felt you tense as you neared the house, swooping lower in order to land on the large balcony attached to his room. He placed you on shaky legs gently and looked down to smile at you again – heart so full of love and peace.

Not only was his brother returned to him in one piece, but along beside him came you. His mate. His mate.

You caught his gaze and gave him a tight-lipped smile, terrified for history to repeat itself. You wanted to talk to him and know him – you didn’t want him to learn to love your body instead of you. And you were truly afraid to be touched again, you hadn’t been with a man since you were raped – fear stopping you before they could get close and walls slamming up if they tried.

“Are you okay?” Azriel’s voice was dripping with concern – genuine concern, and the way he said it made tears well up in your eyes. His own instantly widened as he sensed the sadness and fear rolling of you in waves, wrapping his arms around your shoulders as you sobbed into his chest. “Oh sweetheart we don’t have to do anything, c’mon lets go sit down.”

He guided you through the glass doors and sat you down gently on the bed, holding you gently and coaxing you through your breakdown. Once your breathing had calmed slightly and you had pulled out of his embrace, wiping your tears harshly with the butt of your hand.

“I’m sorry,” you muttered quietly, terrified to anger your mate when you’ve only just found him.

“It’s okay darling, what’s wrong – did I do something? You’re not terrified of heights are you?” he asked, and you laughed softly, a smile growing on his face as his worries eased slightly.

“No, that was fun,” he grabbed your hand in his scarred ones and you gripped it tightly.

“Then what was it?” you looked into those beautiful, worried eyes and let out an exhale – bottom lip quivering.

“I just don’t think I can – I can’t do that tonight.” You whispered the words lowly, afraid of his reaction as you clung like a child to his hand.

“Hey, that’s okay – we don’t have to do anything until you’re ready,” he smiled, worries easing. You still wanted to be with him, just not in that way yet – and he could wait. He would wait a million years if you asked.

“Even if I’m not ready for a while?” You asked, and he held your face in his hands gently – looking into your tear-filled, defeated eyes.

“I would wait forever and then some – I have already waited so long to meet you, I’m sure I can last longer, especially if you’re next to me.” Your smile was so sad when you met his eyes.

“I’ve been told that before,” Azriel just pulled you closer to him with a cheeky grin.

“And were any of them your mate?”

“No,” you smiled at him again and he thought his heart was going to combust.

“Well then, I love to prove people wrong.” You buried your head into his chest as his arms came around you once more, “Would you like to sleep here, or would you like your own room?”

“Here is fine, I like the way you make me feel,” you said quietly, tugging on the bond experimentally. Azriel just smiled and tugged back.

“That works for me, I’ll get you a change of clothes.” He moved to stand but you stopped him – tugging on the dress shirt he wore.

“I want this,” you grinned cheekily up at him, and he laughed, but undid the buttons and pulled it off anyway – turning around to let you change in peace. When he turned back around you were looking up at him with wide eyes – looking impossibly cute in his shirt.

“It has holes in the back,” you complained, and he laughed, sitting down to tug off his trousers before sliding under the covers as you scrambled to lay in his arms.

“Well I do have wings,” he cemented his point by letting one drape over your shoulders as you sighed in content.

“Really, I hadn’t noticed,” you deadpanned quietly, burrowed deep under his arms and the covers. His chest rumbled with the silent laugh as he pressed a kiss into your hairline.

The next morning he awoke to you laying on his chest, tracing the scars on the backs of his hands with a delicately pointed finger. He stared in wonder, and you must have felt his gaze because you turned your head to meet his eyes, face still puffy from sleep. As you whispered to him that morning, your chin resting on his chest as you gazed up at him until he rose to get your morning drinks. Barely daring to leave for more than a few seconds. And when he returned he was so glad he did – welcoming the sight of you curled up under his sheets with a shy smile and tired eyes.

“Do we have to do anything today?” you asked as you sipped your drink slowly, Azriel’s’ arm tight and secure around your waist.

“Nope,” he said, delighted at the prospect, “I just want to be with you and my family.”

“Sounds heavenly.”

True to his word, for the next few weeks that past, you and Azriel didn’t progress past slow, occasional kisses and lingering touches. But before either of those he was always searching your eyes – asking permission. And you truly fell in love with him during those weeks.

He was caring and consistent – never promising anything he couldn’t bring. And he cared for you, he cared for you past your body and looks. He wanted to be with you for an eternity.

One night, while you lay together, speaking lowly and listening to the rain fall outside your room – a glass door cracked open, you decided you were ready. You pressed closer to him, your lips meeting his own in a kiss more passionate than you had previously shared.

He followed your lead with just as much passion, but when you crawled into his lap he pulled away slightly.

“Are you sure? I don’t want to rush you,” he asked quietly, hands coming to rest on your hips.

“I’m sure, I love you and I want to be with you.” You told him sincerely, “But I haven’t been with anyone in a few years so I’m a little out of practice.”

You giggled nervously but he furrowed his eyebrows, “But you told me about your boyfriends?”

“Yeah but I – stopped dating about five years ago.” You tried to explain quickly, old nerves being brought up, but Azriel pulled you closer and as always his touch calmed you.

“Can I ask why?” he watched you drop your head a little as you breathed slowly – determined to not let your fear rise, you would probably end up telling him anyway so you might as well get it over with.

“I was raped.” You stated and his grip on your hips tightened slightly as he swore.

“Darling, I’m so sorry,” he started but you stopped him with a sharp glaze.

“You don’t need to apologise, it happened and it’s over now.” He could practically feel you pull away, so he loosened his grip on your hips and instead brought his arms up to hold you against his chest.

“Who did it?” he asked, voice dark and dangerous. You muttered a name lowly – under your breath – and he pocketed in the darkest corners of his mind for later. His shadows itching to tear the man apart.

“Look (y/n), if you’re ready I am more than happy to oblige but I need to know you’re really ready, I will wait as long as you need.” You pulled away from his chest and kissed him gently.

“I’m ready, I trust you,” he smiled up at you from where you perched on his lap and you giggled and he flipped you over, laying between your legs with a feral grin.

He made you cum three times with his mouth and those beautiful, beautiful hands alone – more than you had ever experienced with a man and he hadn’t even received any pleasure yet. Except from the pleasure of watching his perfect mate fall apart on his sheets, over and over.

And when he lay over you, your legs pushed up and wrapped around his waist, and his forearms on either side of your head – he would later swear he had never felt more complete.

“I’m here with you remember, will be the whole time.” He assured you, voice soft as he lined himself up and you smiled.

“I love you so much,” you whispered, and he pushed in slowly, filling every part of you and pushing against every spot you didn’t know you had. You swore under your breath when he bottomed out, the slight pain quickly being reduced to please as he dropped his head into the crook of your neck.

“Fuck baby, you feel so good,” you felt shivers run through your body at his gruff voice and smiled, moaning when he began to move.

He pulled his head from where it hid in your neck and watched as you closed your eyes – head thrown back with a smile – and his hips bucked, desperately trying to control himself as he watched you arch your back.

“Shit Az, you’re so big,” you moaned loudly, unaware of the trance you had pulled your mate into.

“You’re so pretty,” he whispered with a harsh thrust, a hand coming to stroke down your face as you opened your eyes to meet his, “So perfect.”

You felt as if your heart was going to burst from the love that filled it as you reached up to kiss him softly – conveying every word, every thought, through that kiss. When you pulled away you were nearing your end, the sensations building in you without the need of a fantasy or your own hand.

You moaned his name, gripping his shoulders tightly as one hand instinctively moved to stroke down his wing. He shuddered above you with a loud groan – his thrusts speeding up as he to neared release, yours hips surely bruising from the force of his own.

“C’mon baby, need to feel you, need to know you’re mine.” His words ignited something in your stomach, and you clung tighter to him, kissing his sharp jaw as you smiled.

“I’m yours Azriel, now and forever.” Your gentle words pushed him over the edge and his skilful fingers dipping between your thighs brought you down with him. The two of you crying out at the sensations you shared as a growing need to never let him go consumed you.

He collapsed on top of you soon after and he intertwined your fingers with his own as your breathing evened out. He slipped out of you, and you smiled up at him as he sat up, rolling off your body and laying to the side while you came to rest your head on his firm chest. He brought his spare hand upwards – twirling strands of your hair slightly as you rested in silence. After a few minutes, you clambered into his lap and kissed him firmly as he pulled you impossibly close.

“Thank you,” you whispered against his lips, and he felt his heart swell with gratitude to the world for giving him an angel that would willingly hold his hand and guide him out of the darkness.

“I am so in love with you,” he whispered back, and you giggled, a hand moving slowly to stroke him as you felt him harden beneath you again.

“Hmm, is that so?” you whispered.

Azriel, who had started pressing light kisses into your neck, nipped you gently, making you squeal, “What were you saying darling?”

“That I am also deeply, and unequivocally in love with you.” You replied and he rolled his eyes.

“Just putting me to shame with your big words.” He muttered and you giggled – crawling down his body.

“I’m sure I could make it up to you.”

[wildernessuntothemselves]

How Do You Do

Word Count: 1.4k

Genre: smut

Summary: Chan is the thottie life guard at your beach that’s been trying to het into your pants since forever but hasn’t exactly earned it. 

“It’s the big event today.” Chan’s voice rings out from over the counter, and you get up from trying to look for a certain bottle of liquor to look at him. ”Will you cheer me on, babe?”

“Depends.” You smirk, pushing your arms against the counter, the action emphasizing your breasts in the bikini top you are wearing and drawing Chan’s attention to your cleavage.  “Only if you put on a good show for me.”

You know he will. He’s always trying to impress you. It’s kinda adorable. And despite his bravado, he blushes at your words and mumbles, “I always put on a show for you.”

“What did you say?”

“Nothing!” He yelps, and thrusts a bottle of sunscreen in your hands. You look at him quizzically and he regains his cocky facade. “Help me put the sunscreen on. I don’t want to get sun burned while I’m rocking your world.”

You roll your eyes, “Alright, come back here, handsome.”

Chan obeys, dimples on full display. You stand behind him, squeezing some sunscreen on your hand before smearing it on his shoulder blades. Running your hands along his shoulders and down his bulging arms, you have to admit, the boy is ripped.

As if he can hear what you’re thinking, he says, “You’re focusing so much on my arms, baby. You like my muscles?”

“I do.” You don’t miss a beat, massaging said arms. “Hmm, what a big boy.”

You can’t see his face but you can see the way his ears turn red and you know you’ve successfully flustered him. Satisfied, you let your arms drop to his pecs where you “accidentally” brush your fingers over his nipples and get rewarded with the whimper he clearly tries to hold in. 

For good measure, you sweep over his nipples again, this time eliciting a weak moan from him, before your hands move to his lower abdomen, rubbing the cream in circles and feeling his abs clench under you. 

You know he’s getting turned on, and just for fun, you breathe against his ear as you swirl your fingers just over the waistband of his shorts. Chan shivers and tries to pull away. 

“Okay, t-thank you.” He stutters, moving away but you pull him back against your chest. “I haven’t done your legs yet, baby.” 

“That’s okay. I’ll do them myself.” He struggles to say, but you immediately shut him down. 

“Nonsense.” You say firmly, “Turn around, Channie.” 

He hesitates before obeying, a grimace on his face as he turns around, flustered and taking sneaky glances at you. You don’t even acknowledge the tent in his shorts. Instead, you squirt more sunscreen onto your palm and get on your knees. 

“W-what are you doing?!” Chan yelps, but you just wrap your hands around his calves and work the sunscreen into his skin, making your way up his legs silently, focused. By the time you reach his thighs, he’s panting and his dick is straining against his shorts, almost as if it’s trying to reach your mouth that was just in front of it. Slipping your hands just under the legs of his shorts, you look up at him. His breath hitches as he holds your gaze for a second before you break it and stand up. 

“There. All done.” 

Chan’s knees almost give way and he stares at you in shock. “But---”

“The competition is going to start soon.  Run along now, baby boy. You have some impressing to do.” 

You laugh to yourself as you watch Chan limp to the men’s room.

____________

And boy did he impress. He won all the competitions he participated in. 

Naturally, he was strutting towards you by the end of the day, confident and waiting for you to fawn over him. 

“Look, baby girl. I won.” He puffs his chest out, displaying his trophies for you. 

“You sure did.” You smirk, and he frowns at your lack of fawning. “Don’t I get a reward?”

"What about all those trophies?"

He pouts, setting them on the bar and coming around to you even though he wasn't allowed to do that. "I meant a reward from you."

You cock your head to the side and move close to him, pressing your body against his. “Yeah, like what?”

He pauses for a second, flushing at your closeness, before saying, “A kiss would be nice.” 

You laugh, brushing his hair back. “You’re cute.” 

Chan frowns. “I’m not cute. I’m sexy.” He complains, voice slurring. “When will you take me seriously?”

“Maybe when you stop ordering tons of drinks from me just so you’d have the chance to talk to me.” You say and he whines. “So you know I like you! Why are you playing so hard to get then?”

“Because baby,” You purr, brushing your nose against his. You push him against the counter and place your knee between his legs, pressing your thigh against his dick. “You don’t impress me the slightest bit. I eat boys like you for breakfast.” 

“What do I have to do?” He whimpers, using the chance to grind against your thigh. “I’ll do anything for you.” 

“I know you will.” You kiss along his jaw and down his neck, making him buck harder against your thigh. “I could suck you so good, you wouldn’t have anything else to give another woman. I could edge you so long you’d cum on command. I could fuck you so good, you won’t be able to get your pretty dick off without my pussy again.” 

You bite down on his neck, making him groan and throw his head back in ecstasy. 

“But I won’t. You wanna know why?”

He lets out a weak sad moan, shaking his head at your question and desperately waiting for you to explain. 

“Because you haven’t earned it.”

“How do I earn it?” He says right away, breathless and needy. 

“Prove that you’re more than just a pretty face and show me that you can handle what I have to give.” You explain, running your fingers around his nipple oh-so-slow. “Start by giving yourself a ruined orgasm. If you can handle doing that without trying to save it, then maybe I’ll touch you.” 

______________________

He tries. He tries so much but he always fails, jerking himself off just as he pushes himself over the edge, unable to take the pain that comes with cumming untouched. 

Weeks pass by, and you feel disappointed. You really thought Chan could do it. But maybe he figured it would be easier to get a girl that would let him fuck her without any ifs or buts, and he had no shortage of that. He’s gorgeous for fuck’s sake. So yeah, you’re disappointed. You shouldn’t have put so much faith in a fuckboy like him. 

But then he surprises you. 

You had just participated in a wet t-shirt contest, not really taking into consideration if Chan will watch you or not. You figured he had already given up on you. But he shows up, standing in the audience and never taking his eyes off of you, not even sparing a glance to the other girls. You can feel his gaze eat your body up as the water turns your white shirt transparent and makes it stick to your braless tits, highlighting your nipples that pebble in the cold and seem to be the focus of Chan's transfixation.

By the time you step off the stage, he had dissapeared from the audience. But you don't have to wait long to know where he went as you promptly receive a message from him. It’s a video of him in what you recognize to be the lifeguard changing rooms. You can see him wearing the navy blue swim shorts he was wearing this morning, and right in the middle is his outlined and very hard dick straining against the material. You see his veiny hands twist around the top of it, giving him stimulation that nearly pushes him over the edge as it is. But he stops before it gets anywhere. 

Placing his hands on either side of his shorts, he alternatively tugs on them, moving the material over his hard dick. "Ah hurts baby…” He cries out as if you could hear him, “So sensitive… ahh AHHH…" 

You rub your thighs together at the scene in front of you. Watching Chan squirm and try to not touch his dick is hotter than you ever imagined. 

"Am I doing good?” He breathes out wantonly, and you can see his dick twitching behind his shorts. “Is this making you wet baby? Please tell me this is making you wet because I'm going crazy. Need you to like this."

You do like it. You like it so much. 

“You looked so good up there. Wanted to push you down and cum all over your tits so everyone will know that you’re mine. Hated how they were all gawking at my girl…”

It doesn’t take Chan long to cum, he was already so riled up by watching the white shirt you were wearing do nothing to conceal your hard, perked nipples under it. He wanted to so bad to fuck your tits and cum on your face, but he knew he had to earn it. So that’s what he was doing, putting on a good show for you so you’d let him fuck you.

You see his dick twitch before the white cum seeps through his shorts, making a mess and making you wish he was there so you could jump on him and ride his dick until he cries from overstimulation. 

You know he’ll take it well too. He’s been waiting so long for it. 

Opening up the chat, you type in a message. 

“Stay where you are, pup.”

___________

[cinnamonest]

Since people actually liked it here's the continuation of the modern Xiao camgirl!darling post I cut from the original, as promised, most if it's under a cut. Here’s the original post. I didn’t think people would actually like the camgirl concept so I thought I was rambling too much and cut this part out lol but here it is now!

Tws: derogatory language/female slurs, mentions of reader being a cheater, reader is promiscuous, murder, incel-y mentality (our modern boy would be a 4chan user, look me in the eye and tell me I'm wrong) and mentions of upsetting realistic things, this one's darker than the first part. If you're bothered by other modern stuff for being too realistic best avoid this too probably, involuntary pornography ---------- Coming up on one year since you gained your most loyal subscriber, you get a rather... Unsettling request. He has something he would like this month, in fact, he adds a few hundred to the regular amount (he's been saving up just for this) and asks for just the answer to one simple question. What's your name?

Your real name, he clarifies. He doesn't need a last name, nothing like that. It would just... Make him feel closer to you. He avoids using the term "anniversary," even though that's what comes to mind. He also doesn't tell you that he already knows, that this is just a test of your honesty. For someone who's so cautious, you would think you would think to give a fake name whenever you go to coffee shops for them to yell out, or change it on the packages you get. You hesitate. And it would be easy to give him a fake one, yet, you don't really think about it too much, you kinda think about that as an afterthought, what you should have done, but your very real name is typed out and sent before you really process it, and you feel a sort of unease, but it's already sent. No big deal. He can't do much with just your first name, right? If your name is common, you feel pretty safe, but even if it's a rarer one, surely there are other people with it, right? He's happy though. Kinda surprised, really, that you didn't lie to him. Maybe you trust him?

You're not stupid, you know something is wrong, you're becoming paranoid. And you connect the weird feeling to him, bc he goes radio silence for several days leading up to finally taking you. This dude who used to respond to any messages you sent within 10 seconds suddenly... It's like he disappeared? He hasn't responded to anything you send him ever since you said your name. You send him messages saying you haven't heard from him in a while and you're worried... The way you word it makes it sound like you're worried about him, but you both know that's not what you really mean. You're hesitant and suspicious of every guy you meet. You buy pepper spray and start carrying some around, you nearly spray a poor guy who you thought was trailing you, turns out he just lives in your building. He makes note of it. He watched you buy it, and is quick to realize you always hold it in the same hand. That must be your dominant hand, that's an important mental note for the future, since you're more likely to try to attack him with that hand. He'll remember. He has a note in his phone with information like that. Height, weight, birthday, social security number, parents' names, school she graduated from. All in little bullet points. He adds dominant hand to the list. He's not worried at all really. Already watched you struggle to carry packages he could lift with one hand, your strength doesn't cross his mind as a threat. At first he just doesn't know what to say, and that's why he stops responding, he feels too awkward but... He starts to enjoy the weird feeling of power the whole situation is giving him. You're worried, you're constantly paranoid, and it's because of him. Now you finally understand the same feeling you inflict on him, how you consume his thoughts every waking moment of every day. It used to irritate him that you held so much power over him, while he meant nothing to you. Now, the tables have turned. You're forced to have him constantly in your mind, whether you like it or not, just like you are in his. It's giving you what you deserve. It gives him a feeling of significance. He matters, even if it's not in a good way. And he keeps telling himself that once he's all you have, he'll matter even more. He's smart enough to realize that if you're paranoid, you might have mentioned him by username to someone else, so to ensure he knows what to do from this point, he has to sneak into your apartment at night as you sleep. It's so unbearably tempting, you have no idea -- you're right there and so vulnerable. He has to hold himself back because he knows that if he so much as touched you, he couldn't hold back. But it's torture, standing there so close, watching your chest rise and fall as he fiddles with the phone. Even when he unlocks it with your thumb, he tries to hold the phone from an angle to do so, even if the skin of his hand grazes yours, it would be too much. You have a lot of contacts across your messages and a bunch of different apps. You have one guy in your online chat you've exchanged far more messages with than anyone else! Hundreds upon hundreds of messages, and huge paypal cash drops, who the hell is -- oh, wait, that's him. Nevermind. But, to his pleasant surprise, he's the only one of your... customers that you regularly talk to, the rest just have a few paypal notifications or clarifications on your policies, but no actual conversations like you have with him. Of course, that's literally part of your deal, he's literally paying for it, but it makes him happy nonetheless. But as he goes through your personal messages, he finds that you are... in no shortage of options. Like, holy shit. It was kind of expected. You *are* really pretty, that's how you have so many followers after all, but this is a lot. So many contacts named some variation of "DO NOT ANSWER!!!" or "creepy guy that forced me to give him my number at the club", etc etc. Plenty of unsaved numbers texting you to never get a response. You've ghosted enough dudes to make your place haunted. It's... kinda awful, really. It also kinda hurts his heart a bit more than he expected. You have so, so, so many options, even without the cam thing, he's more insignificant than he even realized. ...Well, for now, at least. He'll be significant to you soon enough. And then you seem to have a sort of "boyfriend of the month" deal going on, aside from that. Plenty of male-name contacts whose last exchange is a "don't talk to me again!" message from you, plenty of messages corresponding to the same time as those to your girl friends about how you can't find a good guy and every relationship ends badly. How unfortunate. See, it's because you choose bad guys. You probably go for dicks and not.... well, he can't exactly pull the "nice guys like me" mentality, he doesn't delude himself into thinking he is one. He's lucid enough to realize that most nice guys would not be sneaking into your house and standing over your sleeping body to stalk your phone as they make plans to kidnap you. He knows he would probably fall under the classification of a creepy guy. He's just too far gone to care. Still, he would be so much better to you, he tells himself, not a cheater or a player like you complain about. To say he resents those kinds of guys -- ones that can do the unthinkable and actually talk to girls, let alone successfully, only to be assholes, and yet girls like you still go for them -- is an understatement. You're basically just a slut, you probably ignore all the guys that would be nice to you, just like all those internet forums he reads talk about. Typical.

Well, those forums also make fun of guys like him who pay for girls like you, but he can't blame them. It *is* kinda pathetic. There is one dude you talk to, though, now. Current boyfriend of the month, from the looks of it. You have a little heart emoji next to the name. He knows it's kinda pathetic that something so simple and insignificant sets him off, but it does, makes him pout and grind his teeth and curl his other hand into a fist. It's so unfair. Some dude you barely know gets to fuck you, and you haven't even known him nearly as long as you've known him! He doubts this dude -- hell, any of your boyfriends -- has put in the same amount of money that he has into you. They fuck you practically for free. And that, unfortunately for you, only solidifies his decision. If you're fucking some dude for a month because they buy you dinner every now and then, if we're going by that scale, then you owe him quite a good deal of pussy. Any hesitancy or guilt he had about the whole thing is gone. And he's a little mad. Keeps grumbling to himself that you're just a loose whore, fucking so many people and putting yourself out there on the internet. He wonders if they even know about what you do. Probably not, you probably don't tell them. Yeah, that sounds like what you'd do. Really, you're kinda lucky that someone like him is so willing to commit to you, since you are a slut. You don't deserve it, but he loves you anyway. And you'll probably have the nerve to be ungrateful for it too. Sigh. On the bright side, by some miracle, it would appear that you have not told any real-life people about him, you haven't sent out any hey if I disappear you should probably look into this creep type of messages. But he can't afford to have you doing so in between now and when you move in with him, so, he decides he has to act within the next 24 hours. While he's here, though, he decides to do a quick sweep of your place. Makes note of what snacks and drinks you like, what brand of toothpaste and shampoo and the like you use, so he can buy some for you. Maybe you'll adjust better if you have some of your favorite things. And then, after days of silence, he sends you a message, says it's fine, his internet went out for a few days. He means it to reassure you, but somehow it makes you feel more uneasy. He has everything planned out, or so he thinks. But you deviate from your usual schedule. When you leave work or class, you don't go home, you go somewhere else, first. How strange. Maybe picking up groceries? He follows from a distance. No, looks like you're going out to eat...? Maybe you're meeting friends or family or -- no that's a guy. Fuck. You must have planned this just earlier today, since there were no messages on your phone. It makes a bitter feeling rise in his gut. He hates that he can't get close enough to listen to your conversation. Well, he hates the whole thing, sits there and seethes the whole time. Watches you through the windows in the parking lot, thankfully you chose to sit outside. Feels his eye twitch and his hand clench every time you smile and laugh. It takes way too long. The fact that you split the bill feels like a punch to the stomach too. Shouldn't you be used to taking guys' money? Oh, and what's this...? This guy isn't the picture on boyfriend-of-the-month's contact. Well, well, well. You really are a whore. See, it's a very good thing he's taking you off the market. You're probably a reckless heartbreaker too. He's doing all the other men of the world a favor by taking on such a burden as you. And it makes him feel far more justified in keeping you locked away, since he has every reason to believe, now, that you'd run off and fuck someone else if given the chance. Halfway through, the guy briefly gets up and runs to the bathroom or something. While he's gone, he sees your face fall a bit. And then he sees you look around. You turn your head from one side to the other. Your eyes scan the area. You shuffle uncomfortably and you bite your lip and your eyebrows furrow. You're scared. You feel like -- no, you know you're being watched and it scares you. That makes him a little happy, for some reason. He wouldn't be sure what to do if you went home with the guy, but thankfully you don't. No big deal, this was just a bump in the road, he still beats you back to your building and he still goes through with the original plan. Even better, now that it's even darker outside. If anything, now he's got extra aggression and testosterone in his blood, running over the events in his head and going through some... very forceful and violent fantasies. The message he sent had you uneasy, and it's also how you immediately know what's going on when it does finally happen. You keep telling yourself you're being unnecessarily paranoid, that it's nothing, maybe that guy actually got his life together or got a girlfriend or something. Things like... What you fear, don't happen in real life, that's stuff that only happens in movies and stuff. You keep calling it that or it in your head. That won't happen to you. It's not going to happen. The series of events that play out in your head, scenarios you try to push out of your mind. Sure, in the movies it always takes place in the stairwell, but that's fiction, so you go up the apartment stairwell as always. You're not gonna let a bunch of B-grade old films scare you. And it's always some dude standing and waiting, but that nice young boy that you've never seen before is just leaning against the wall, scrolling on his phone, he only glances up for a second as you pass by, he's not a threat, you're being paranoid. You flash a smile and a little wave as you walk by, he doesn't return either, just looks back down at his phone. See? This guy doesn't even care, you're being paranoid for nothing, you tell yourself. But as you make the turn to go up the next set of stairs you hear the click of a phone being put on the lockscreen, a few metallic footsteps ringing out in the open hall and echoing, coming up right behind you, but for that split second you expect a tap on the shoulder, maybe he has a question, it's not like movies, it's not like movies, you're not gonna get a cloth shoved over your face and--- Well, it's not exactly like the movies. You were prepared, but it all happens in one motion - one hand grabs the hand with the spray and twists it, making you drop it, the other wraps some material over your mouth. You were prepared enough that you don't gasp in surprise, you hold your breath and thrash, but it doesn't make any difference, you wiggle and writhe for a few moments but can't even begin to break free, eventually succumb to the lack of oxygen and take a deep breath. It takes a few seconds to settle in, it's not so immediate. You instinctively panic and thrash again, but he has a complete iron grip. The dizziness takes a second to set in. He huffs a bit in frustration and says stop moving, it's fine. It's definitely not, but it occurs to you that that's not something a kidnapper looking for any potential vulnerable girl says. It's a poor attempt at comfort. It's someone specifically looking for you. And if that wasn't enough, he says your name. Your very real name. Maybe it was a mistake to tell him after all. But the worst part of it all is that there's not a single doubt in your mind, even in your panic you have the realization, it's definitely him and this is literally exactly what you were afraid of. And it's the last thing that goes through your head. And once he's got you out cold he just takes a sigh of relief. He may have been very neutral faced to you, but in reality he was incredibly nervous. He hasn't exactly made or used chloroform before, our boy is operating on YouTube tutorials here. He's got adrenaline pumping through his veins and carries you with his arms trembling. He's on autopilot carrying you out, but his mind is also consumed by holy fuck I'm touching her she smells so nice she's so warm her face is so close I'm actually touching her-- you get the idea. He feels bad about taping your hands and feet together and putting you in the trunk of his car, kinda. It feels too much like what a really bad person would do to a girl they didn't care about, like he's a trafficker or a murderer or a criminal or something, but that's not true at all. Sure, he's still mad at you for being a whore and all that, but it feels improper, he just has no choice. It's late at night, but he can't risk getting pulled or being at a stoplight and someone seeing an unconscious girl in his backseat, so, trunk it is. But once he's home, to his tiny little downtown apartment (he'll probably be able to move into a better place soon, since he's not paying you tons of money anymore), he takes a quick check to make sure the coast is clear, and drags you out, up the stairs, all the way into his apartment, sets you down on the bed, where you'll be staying. He even washed the sheets and cleaned the place up a bit for your arrival. You probably would not like to see what this place looked like before the five trash bags worth of cleaning was done. He'll probably be more motivated in the future, though, since now he won't be so depressed all the time. And then the adrenaline of the fear of being seen is over, and that's when it sets in that this is real. It's very, very hard to hold back. You're real, in the flesh, he can reach out and touch you with his hands! It feels like a dream. And he realizes he can take this opportunity to do things he would be far, far too embarrassed to do when you're awake. He takes a few minutes to do just that, cautiously reaches out to poke your face, and then run a hand down your neck, your skin is so soft! Your hair smells so nice, he lays down beside you and runs his fingers over it. Puts hands on your body and just lays there in awe of the fact that you're real. He's pretty certain he's never actually touched a human female before now. Everything about you feels soft. Weirdly feminine, which is something very foreign and confusing to him. And he kinda uh... Loses it. Goes buckwild with just taking in every aspect of you. Again, since you're unconscious he can be gross and entirely shameless about it. Peels your clothes off and runs his hands and mouth over every inch of flesh, takes the tape off your lips and presses his tongue into your limp mouth until he's forced to let go to breathe, fingers you and tonguefucks you and sucks on your nipples and your neck. Lays pressed against you and just breathes in your scent. It takes every ounce of self control he has not to fuck you already. But he does jerk off a few times. That way he'll last longer, so it's a win-win. And then... you twitch. Tape goes back over your mouth. And then, you twitch again. And this time, you make a little "mm!" under the tape, you start trembling and he sees you try to pull your hands apart. You whimper. It sounds scared and distressed. He feels kinda bad, but it also makes him hard, and that outweighs any guilt by far. Besides, it's what you deserve after what you did earlier. You tortured him mentally, it's only fair. On the good side of things, you suppose, you don't have to worry about the usual fears one would have over such a situation - you're fairly certain he's not going to kill you, nor sell you. In fact, the bed you wake up on is pretty soft. You're naked and the tape is uncomfortable, but... At least he was considerate enough to give you a blanket. He does care about you, after all. First thing he says is asking if you're awake. Can you hear me? You hesitate a moment, and then you nod. He's a bit new to this whole abduction thing. He wants to make sure he didn't pull a muscle or something with the tape. So... Do you hurt anywhere? Does your head hurt? Oh, right, the tape. He's not stupid either. You have to promise you're not going to scream. In fact, he's angry enough about earlier that he gets a bit meaner than he originally told himself he'd be. If you scream, I'll make you regret it. Understand? You nod, so he takes it off, holding it close in preparation in case you were lying, but you don't actually answer him, you're silent again for a minute, then just ask a question of your own. You're that guy, right? He's silent for a few seconds, there's no need for any clarification. Finally just says yeah. You just breathe again. Silently. Finally you summon the courage to ask him what he wants with you. And why are you doing this to me? And his answer is fairly simple. What do you think? You don't say anything for a minute, and neither does he. He's not good with words, and you don't really have ones for this situation. It occurs to you that offering to pay him to let you go is probably not the solution. After all, this is the guy that's dumped unimaginable amounts of money onto you, you couldn't even come close to paying him back. You figure maybe, after he gets what he wants... well, you get the courage to ask.  Is there anything... that I can do o-or... anything that will make you... are you gonna let me go, after you....? And the answer is, again, simple, but the one you did not want to hear. No. He's a blunt boy, so he doesn't beat around the bush, but he doesn't torment you by keeping anything from you. In fact, he's already rehearsed this speech a few hundred times in his head. He just wanted to make sure he's very clear so there's no misunderstanding, and while he likes some discomfort in a vengeful sort of way, he doesn't want you to be too freaked out to where you have a panic attack. He says he's just going to... keep you here. He has the things you'll need. He got your purse with your keys, so he'll even run to your apartment after this to go get some of your stuff. You don't need to tell him which number, he adds, he already knows which apartment you're in. He needs you here, he says. And he makes sure to add that it's your fault. If you were never out there selling yourself in the first place, this never would have happened. If you're good, he can make things a bit better for you. But you need to go ahead and accept that you're going to be staying and that no amount of begging or offers is going to convince him to let you go. He can be nice to you, he promises. A better boyfriend than the others. You just have to be a good girlfriend -- you know, obedient and sweet and do what he says. Just like you always were when you talked to him. Just keep being sweet like that and doing the things he tells you to do. You would argue that the terms boyfriend and girlfriend are not appropriate descriptors of the sort of relationship he's creating, but you keep that thought to yourself. Instead, you ask, How long are you going to keep me here? Which is a dumb question, since he's pretty sure he already made that clear. Forever. -----

There's a double homicide in the area. Takes place on the same night, and the same diameter of knife is used, so police believe maybe the two incidents are connected. Especially because they do have something in common, one girl. She was romantically involved with both of them. The girl in question's apartment has been vacated, very suddenly, and the girl has disappeared without a trace, taking things with her from the looks of it, so police believe she may be responsible, but other than that, they have no leads. A few weeks later, a video circulates all over the internet. Some famous camgirl finally started making porn, apparently. Just one video, but the description (which was totally written by her, it has to be since it's written in first person right?) says something about how she decided to quit camming, so this video marks the end of her career. She got into a relationship, so she says in the description, so she has to quit. It's roleplay porn, apparently, she's doing a good job at the acting. All tied up and gagged and getting fucked by some big-dicked guy holding the camera. He's silent, but she's making a ton of noise, cums several times. Really good acting, the fear and desperation in her eyes looks so real. Talk about going out with a bang. It gets a lot of likes. Tons of comments about how sad people are she's quitting. And of course, a lot of comments say, what a lucky guy.

[connordavidscamera]

A Jealous Household | Connor Brashier

A/n: listen, I know it says y/n, but we all know it’s written about me, right? Okay, just wanna put that out there lol

Summary: Shawn and Brian want to have a party, but this party causes a few problems for Connor and y/n

Warnings: angst, underage drinking (for US standards, at least), pining

Word count: 7.5k, she’s a long one

***

“You want to have a party? When?” Y/n asks, closing her book and setting it in her lap.

“This weekend,” Shawn nods. “And it won’t be a big thing, I promise. Maybe fifteen, twenty people.”

“Thirty or forty, max,” Brian interjects.

I can’t help but laugh at that, neither can she as she says. “You know we can’t even fit thirty or forty people in the condo, right?”

“I know that, but that’s why we’ll have some of them in the backyard too.”

“So what’s the party even for?” She asks, leaning into my side. On instinct, I wrap my arm around her shoulders. 

They both shrug, “A house warming party? Does that still count if we’ve lived here for almost two months?” Shawn questions. 

She shrugs, “I don’t know. I mean, I don’t see why we couldn’t have one. We just have to be considerate of our neighbors. And nobody’s allowed in my room. If there’s alcohol, I’m not chancing anyone going into my room for a sloppy fuck.”

Shawn laughs, “So your sloppy fuck is gonna be in Connor’s room then?”

I roll my eyes at the comment. Shawn and Brian love to tease me about my crush on y/n. They have since the beginning. Shawn’s taunts are light hearted, but they’re plentiful now that we all live together. Brian’s at times feel almost malicious. But Brian also isn’t aware that I still have a crush on her, he thinks the feeling has passed. It definitely hasn’t. If anything, being in such tight quarters with her at all times has made me like her even more. Watching her move so effortlessly around our home - seeing her do her nightly routine, watching her polish her nails every Sunday like clockwork. I have undeniably fallen even deeper in love with her in just these few short weeks we’ve lived together and it’s killing me.

It’s killing me because we still haven’t talked about what she said to me a couple weeks ago when we were falling asleep together. I don’t even know if she remembers saying what she did. And I could have misinterpreted her words, I mean, she was falling asleep, her words were slurring. I could have misunderstood. At least, that’s what I’ve been telling myself every time the memory pops into my head. Which is about six times a day for the past three weeks.

Y/n gasps and tosses her book at him, "Asshole!"

He laughs, picking the book up off the floor from where it ricocheted off his chest. "I'm kidding. Kidding. But it's cool?"

She shrugs, "Yeah, whatever. Go nuts."

"Yes!" Shawn pumps his fist in the air before high fiving Brian. 

"We gotta get alcohol."

"Ah, wait. Before you two go broke buying drinks for the party, remember that we have bills to pay. So save us all a headache and make it BYOB."

Brian snaps and points at her with a click of his tongue. "This is why we keep you around."

She laughs, "Oh is that why?"

"Indeed," he nods.

"Okay, well can I have my book back, please?"

"Yeah, here," Shawn leans over the coffee table to hand it to her before disappearing to his room, Brian heading to the kitchen.

"What's wrong?" I ask, not looking up from my phone. I can sense that the wheels are turning in her head and she sighs dramatically.

"I don't remember which page I was on."

I force myself not to laugh. "243."

“Hmm?” She flips to that page and looks up at my side profile. “How’d you know that?”

I shrug, “I always memorize the page you’re on before you close the book, just in case.”

She smiles sheepishly and presses a kiss to my shoulder. “You’re cute,” she whispers before turning her attention back to the page in front of her and resting her head in the crook of my neck.

I squeeze her shoulder hoping she doesn’t look up and notice the growing blush on my cheeks, “You’re cuter.”

---

“Do you have any idea who’s coming to this?” Y/n asks as we move a cooler out to the backyard.

I shake my head, “Not really. I think Matt and his girlfriend, honestly, I have no idea. It’s Shawn, so there’s bound to be more people than we’re anticipating.”

“Lots of girls then.”

“Why do you say that?” I ask, setting the cooler down, providing her with my undivided attention (which she has always had). 

“He’s making a name for himself out here. Playing a few more gigs than at home. I noticed at the last one, he’s got a few groupies.”

I chuckle, “Oh really?”

She nods, “There were like five girls there just holding onto his every word. It was actually pretty cool to watch. But he got nervous. Started fidgeting with his necklace, so I had to get him out of there, which of course resulted in death glares from his adoring fans.”

“What? What do you mean? Death glares towards you?”

Y/n laughs, fixing the collar of her shirt that’s falling off her shoulder. “Yeah. I think they thought there was more there than there is,” she shrugs, “And if looks could kill, I would be dead five times over.”

I shake my head, I don’t like that thought, and I say as much. “I don’t like that thought.”

“What? Shawn having groupies?”

“No, girls staring daggers at you because you’re friends with him.”

“It’s not a big deal.”

I know it’s not, but the thought of someone not liking her is appalling to me. “I still don’t like it.”

“Is it because if something happened to me you’d be left to live alone with Shawn and Brian? Because that would make me sad too.”

I force a laugh, “That, and I’d be bored without you.”

She nods understandingly, “I get it. I am the light of your life,” she teases.

You are, I think to myself. “Yeah, yeah,” I say instead, stepping forward, wrapping my arm around her waist. “Let’s get inside, it’s hot as hell out here.”

Shawn and Brian are sitting on the floor in front of the TV, trying to get the wifi hooked up to it. We barely got wifi installed at the beginning of the week, but we’ve all been so busy, we haven’t had the chance to get everything hooked up to it. 

“It’s not working!” Brian complains, throwing his hands up in frustration.

“Well try again! That’s what the router says.” Shawn counters back.

“Let me see that,” Brian snatches the router out of his hands. “Dumbass! You’re reading me the product number! Not the fucking password!”

Y/n and I hide our faces to keep from bursting into a fit of laughter, but we both break when Shawn pouts when Brian puts the router back in his hands after successfully connecting the TV.

“Oh, what’s with the pouty face, rockstar?” y/n asks.

“Brian’s a dick,” he mutters, which causes Brian to punch his shoulder.

“Ow!” Shawn exclaims, reaching to hold his arm. “That hurt!”

“It was supposed to. Want me to do it again?”

“Craigen,” y/n shakes her head and before I can protest, she’s out of my grasp and I suddenly feel lonely without her body next to mine. “No more fighting.”

“Just one time in the face,” he tries to reason. “Just once. Come on, it’s a long time coming. I’ve wanted to punch him in the face since we were kids.”

“No,” she squats down behind Shawn, wrapping her arms around his shoulders, leaning her head against his. I watch Shawn fall into her touch and I’m envious of him. Even though she holds onto me in the exact same way, almost daily, she isn’t right now and it makes me long for it. Especially when I watch her start to massage his scalp and he hums because her head scratches feel like you’re in heaven. “You can’t punch him in the face. That’s the money maker,” she squishes his cheeks with her free hand and speaks in a mock baby voice, “And if he’s got a black eye how will he charm girls with his pretty face tonight?”

Shawn laughs and pushes her hand away, but he reaches back and pats her calf. “Sit down,” he says and she obliges, her legs spreading and bracketing Shawn’s. He falls back into her and takes her hand that was just squeezing him and brings it to his lips to kiss her knuckles before bringing it to his hair as well. “More head scratches.”

She rolls her eyes, but continues anyway. “So fucking needy.”

He hums, “Could fall asleep like this.”

She hums too and looks up at me with a smile that melts my heart, “Connor does all the time.”

I nod, “I do. Feels good. Your hands are magic.”

“How magic? Like you could get me off in three seconds?”

“Brian!” I growl. Yep, we can always count on him to ruin the mood.

But y/n’s laughing, “I’m sure I could, I mean, if you ask your first girlfriend, you only last five so I don’t think it’ll be difficult,” she answers.

Shawn’s hysterical in y/n’s arms, as am I as I fall to the floor, clutching my stomach. But Brian? Brian is livid.

“I can’t believe she told you that! She said she wouldn’t tell anyone!”

This only makes Shawn and I laugh harder. “Wait, did that actually happen?” I ask between fits. “Craigen, come on,” I groan when he’s silent. “Five seconds?”

“It was our first time!”

“And last, apparently,” y/n comments.

“Shut up!” he groans. “Fuck, I can’t stand you.”

She nods, “I know.”

“No, but seriously, when did she tell you that?”

Y/n breaks out into a wide grin. “She didn’t. But you just did. Thanks for that.”

He’s speechless. Absolutely speechless. And his face is so red; I don’t know if it’s in anger or embarrassment, but either way, Shawn pipes up. “Hey, if it makes you feel any better, my first time I only lasted like twenty seconds.”

“I lasted fifteen,” I confirm, but I immediately regret it when y/n’s face morphs into one of confusion. 

Oh, oh fuck. I never told her that I-

“Wait, you’ve had sex?”

“You didn’t know?” Shawn questions, looking back at her.

She shakes her head, “I guess not.”

I sigh and scratch the back of my head, “Yeah. It was… during that time where we weren’t really talking,” I mumble.

She nods slowly, scoffing, and I can’t quite pin her emotion, but it’s definitely a cross between anger and… is that jealousy? “Ah, good ol’ McKenzie,” she mutters under her breath. She exhales deeply out her nose and focuses her attention back to playing with Shawn’s hair. 

“I would have told-”

“We weren’t talking. I know,” she cuts me off. “And it’s none of my business. It wasn’t then, and it’s not now either.”

“Oh, right. Okay,” I nod once. “New subject.”

---

We’re tiptoeing around each other the rest of the day. Or more so, I’m tiptoeing around her. She somehow is coming off as completely unbothered, but at the same time completely bothered. I don’t know what to make of this situation. I don’t know if I should apologize for not telling her, or if she even wants me to apologize. I don’t know and it’s killing me not knowing what I can do to make this better for us tonight.

I’m helping Brian pour more ice into the cooler we have in the kitchen when she walks out of her room. “Where’s Shawn?” she asks.

I look up at her and my heart stops for a moment. She’s wearing red, my heart never knows what to do when she wears that color. Does it stop? Does it speed up? Yes. 

“He went to his car to get the beer we got this afternoon,” Brian answers, closing the lid. 

SHe nods, “I’ll go help him.”

I watch as she leaves, not taking a full breath until the door shuts behind her. 

“She still mad at you?” 

I shake my head, “I don’t know. I don’t even know if she is mad at me.”

“Well, it’s y/n. You kept something from her for almost three years. I’m willing to bet she’s a little upset.”

I sigh, “Yeah, I know. But I mean, how was I supposed to tell her. She would barely even look at me during that time, so -”

“Yeah, because McKenzie was a bitch to her. How was she supposed to look at you when she was practically threatened or called out or god know what when you weren’t listening. I’d hate to know what she actually said when none of us were there to listen.”

I exhale deeply. I know my ex was the worst to her - she’s the entire reason y/n and I weren’t talking. She told me not to hang out with her as much, so I didn’t (also because I was trying to prove to Brian that I didn’t have feelings for y/n anymore. That was a mistake.) “So, I should apologize.”

Brian shrugs, “We all know you’re gonna apologize. You can’t stand it when she’s mad at you. Honestly, we can’t either. We have no idea what to do when you two aren’t talking. And since we all live together now, it’ll be even more awkward for you two to not talk.”

I nod, “Yeah. I know. I’ll apologize later. You should go get ready. I can finish up out here.”

Brian claps my shoulder, “Thanks, man. I’ll be quick.” He disappears at the same time Shawn and y/n walk in the front door with the drinks. I make my way over to them.

“Here, let me get that for you,” I tell her, reaching to take the cases from her hands.

“Oh, it’s okay. I got it. You want these inside or out, rockstar?”

“In the fridge, in the back. Gotta keep the good stuff for us.” Shawn hands me a pottle of vodka, “Put this in the freezer? I got it for y/n, I’m gonna make her a new drink.”

“You’re gonna risk giving her alcohol poisoning?” I question, raising one eyebrow at him.

He rolls his eyes, “I’ve gotten better at making drinks, dickhead.”

I laugh and hold my hands up in surrender, “Alright, sure.”

“I’m gonna put these in my room for now, and then I’m gonna get ready.”

“Brian’s in the shower, you can use my bathroom,” I say as y/n moves past us to the kitchen. 

“Good looking out, thanks.”

And now it’s just me and her. It’s like any normal day. So why is my heart beating so quickly?

I watch her move some things around in the fridge to make room for the drinks, and I can’t help but smile. “You look pretty tonight,” I tell her, leaning against the counter.

She looks over at me and smiles softly, “Thanks.”

I clear my throat, “Hey, y/n?”

“Hmm?” she turns her attention back to her task at hand.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?” she asks, closing the fridge.

“For not telling you that I slept with her.”

“Oh,” she nods. “It’s fine. It really is not any of my business who you have and haven’t slept with.”

“Well maybe not, but you are my best friend, and we tell each other everything. I know if we were on better terms when you were dating Noah, you would have told me that you-”

“I didn’t tell you because we didn’t sleep together.”

“What?” I stare at her with wide eyes. 

“Noah and I didn’t sleep together.”

“But I thought-”

“You assumed. But no, it didn’t happen. I wasn’t ready. I mean, I barely let him kiss me, so how the hell was I gonna sleep with him?”

I nod because I don’t know what else to do or even say. She’s right, I just assumed that they had sex because he always had his hands all over her. I almost scoff at the thought. I hated watching him hold her in the hallway, his hands in her back pockets as he pulled her closer to him. Seeing them together everyday made my heart clench every time because it should have been me. I wonder if that’s how she felt when I had a girlfriend. 

“Look, it doesn’t matter, okay? So, let’s just drop it. It’s not like I’m mad you had sex, I was just surprised to find out this way, that’s all.”

“Yeah, I get it. And I would have told you sooner, but there really was never a time, you know? And it was just with her a couple times, nothing since.”

“Connor, you really don’t need to explain it to me. Actually, if we could just stop talking about her all together, that’d be great.”

“No, yeah. Of course. It’s dropped.”

She nods, “Okay, good. So, you should go get dressed.”

“What do you mean? I’m wearing this,”  I gesture to my torn t-shirt and my sweatpants with paint stains up and down the legs from when we painted the living room a few weeks ago. I’m totally joking, but I want to see her reaction anyway.

She looks me up and down and scoffs, “Yeah, no. Go change. You’re not wearing that.”

I pout dramatically, “Why not?”

“One, those pants are a mess. Two, you know you run hot when you drink, so why would you wear sweatpants? And three, that shirt is literally falling apart. You are not wearing that, go change.”

I can’t fight the smile that tugs at my lips because just like that we’re back to normal. “Okay, I’m going. Do you have something you’d like for me to wear?”

“Yes, your black pants with the white tank top and your peachy cream shirt. The one you wore for our graduation party.”

I nod, “Yes, ma’am. You wanna do my hair?”

“Come find me when you’re done, and I’ll see what I can do.”

---

I’m talking to my friend Will out in the backyard as the party becomes bigger than anticipated. Yeah, definitely called that situation. 

“Bro, I wish I would have saved up more so I could have gotten a place like you guys did. I emailed my roommate last week to see what he wanted to get for the dorm and he straight up said, ‘I don’t plan to be roommates long, so nothing.’”

I can’t help but laugh, “Hey, we’d take you in over Brian, but he’d throw a bitch fit.”

He laughs too, twisting the cap off his beer. “So what’s it like living with y/n? Everything good?”

“Yeah, everything’s great. She knows how to run a household. She made a chore chart that goes on the fridge. Shawn had to beg her to take it down for the party because he was embarrassed.”

“Sounds like y/n. But that’s not what I meant.”

I take a swig of my beer and shrug, “There’s nothing else to say really. She’s nice to live with.”

“No progression between you two.”

“Don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Right, right. Because you’re not in love with her, right.”

“Will, come on. Not tonight.”

“Okay, okay. I get it. We’re not in a teasing mood tonight.”

Or ever. Will is a great friend of mine, and I would take a bullet for him, but he asks me for y/n updates every time we’re together, and I never have any for him. When I told him we were moving in together, he was stoked, but less so when I told him we were moving with Shawn and Brian too. 

He - like Shawn - is an avid supporter of us getting together. Will found out about my so-called crush one night in high school, actually a couple weeks after my breakup with McKenzie. Y/n and I still weren’t talking. I was trying to mend things and  she was trying to push me further away. I don’t remember much of the night he found out because I got shit faced drunk, but I somehow admitted to him that I had feelings for her and he’s convinced himself that he knows the biggest secret in the world. He treats it like he holds the key to the universe. If anyone wants us together more than I do, it’s him.

“Just don’t want to risk her hearing anything,” I tell him. “I already made things awkward earlier.”

“What? How?”

I shake my head, “Let it slip that Kenz and I slept together.”

He blanches. “She didn’t know?!”

I shake my head, “No. I never found the right time to tell her. But she keeps saying it isn’t her business, so I don’t know if that means she’s hurt by it or if I’m imagining it because right now it seems like she doesn’t really care. But - I don’t know, I want her to, I guess.” 

He smirks, “She cares.”

“I don’t know,” I mutter, looking inside, lifting my bottle up to my lips, but halting when I see her standing near the sliding glass door with - “Oh, you have got to be fucking kidding me.”

“What?” Will asks, turning toward the door. “What hap - is that? Wait, is that Noah? What is he doing here?”

My jaw clenches, just like the grip around the bottle in my hand. “Better question, why the hell is he so close to her?”

Will sucks in a breath, “Are they still friends?”

I don’t answer him because I don’t know. I’m 99% sure they aren’t, but that 1% that says yes is simply because I’m watching them right now and she’s hugging him and letting him kiss her cheek before he pulls away. “I didn’t think they were. She hasn’t brought him up since the breakup.”

I don’t take my eyes off them as I start chugging the rest of my beer. It was still pretty full, but at this moment, I need to finish it because I need something stronger. 

“I’m gonna go get a drink,” I mutter, tossing my bottle in the trashcan near the cooler. I walk inside, but neither of them notice me. I shake my head and walk to Shawn’s room where he hid most of the hard stuff. I find the bottle of tequila that he stashed because he knew if he put it out, it’d go fast. I twist the top off and take, maybe a little more than a shot. I cough into my elbow when I pull the bottle back because wow he got the strong stuff.

Shaking my head, I close the bottle back up and sneak out of Shawn’s room. When I enter the living room, they’re still standing there talking. Or, he’s talking, she’s nodding at something he’s saying. I click my tongue and walk into the kitchen to grab another beer. SHould I be mixing my alcohol? No, I should not. Is that going to stop me? No, it is not. 

My girl’s ex-boyfriend is over there talking to her and touching her like they’re best buds and I can’t stand it. I can’t stand him. 

I still remember the day she told us that she was going on a date with him. 

All four of us are sitting in our usual booth at the diner, everything seems to be going like it always has. Just us four, laughing and making our weekend plans. The difference though is that y/n and I aren’t sitting shoulder to shoulder right now. She’s pushed against the window, and I’m toward about as far left as I can get without it being noticeable, or falling. 

“So, we’re aiming for Saturday afternoon, right? Y/n, you’ll ride with me?” Shawn asks.

“Oh,” she sits up straight, “um, could we maybe do it on Sunday instead? I kind of already have plans on Saturday.”

“What?” Brian furrows his brows, “Without us?”

She nods, “Yeah,” she takes in a sharp breath beside me. “I um… I kinda, I have a date.”

At that exact moment, our heads whip in her direction - I’m pretty sure if I turned any faster I would have given myself whiplash.

“A date?” I ask as calmly as I can.

“With who?” Shawn questions.

She shrugs, “You know that guy Noah? I have him in like all of my AP classes? He asked me out after class this morning.”

I don’t think I can clench my jaw any harder. Noah. I hate him. I’ve never personally met him, but I hate him. “Cool,” I mutter, turning my head back to the table to reach for my drink. 

“Well?” Shawn prompts. “What are you gonna do? Where is he taking you?”

She clasps her hands in her lap and shrugs again. “I don’t know. He hasn’t told me. Said he wanted it to be a surprise.”

“Ooh, romantic,” Brian teases.

“You hate surprises,” I mumble into my cup.

Y/n clears her throat and shifts uncomfortably in her seat. “It’s just one date. Not a big deal.”

“Okay, sure,” Brian says. “So Sunday then?”

“And you’ll tell us all about it?”

“Sure.”

There are very few times that I wish I was deaf, but that day was one of them. I didn’t sleep that whole night. I couldn’t. And the night of her date? Forget it. I was up all night wondering what was happening. Did he hold her hand? Did he hug her? Did that bastard take her first kiss? The first kiss that was supposed to belong to me? 

And right now, as I watch him reach for her elbow again, I decide, fuck it. I don’t care if I look like a jealous asshole, I’m taking my girl away from him. I stride over to them and place my hand on her hip, “Hey, baby. Can you help me find the bottle opener? I can’t remember what drawer you put it in the other day, and I think my eyes are failing me.”

She shakes her head, “Um, yeah. It should be in the drawer closest  to the fridge.”

“I checked there, please, come help me look.”

She rolls her eyes and turns back to Noah who is staring daggers at my hand on her hip. I smirk. “Noah, it was good catching up with you. I’ll find you later. I’m gonna help him out.”

He looks back up at her and forces a smile, “Sure. Sounds good. Save me dance?”

Over my dead body. “Come on, baby,” I say, guiding her toward the kitchen.

She steps in front of me, mumbling a couple excuse me’s to the people blocking the kitchen. Then she b-line’s to the drawer closer to the fridge, which I definitely did not check because I wasn’t really looking for the bottle opener. I just needed an excuse to get her away from Noah.

“Here,” she holds it out to me. “Wait, I thought Shawn got twist tops.” She takes the bottle from my hand and laughs, “Bub, it twists off.” She says, taking the cap off the bottle. 

“Oh,” I chuckle. I knew it was a twist top, again, I just needed an excuse to get her away. “Whoopsies?” 

She puts the bottle opener back in the drawer and leans against the counter. “You having fun?”

I shrug, “I’m alright. So um… Noah’s here.”

Y/n nods slowly, “Yeah, he is.”

“Kinda weird that he showed up after we just talked about him,” I mutter.

“Yeah, I guess. He just tagged along with one of his friends.”

I nod, “Mhm. You two looked pretty cozy.”

“Excuse me?” 

“Nothing. Just, I mean, I haven’t heard you talk about him since the breakup,” I take a sip of the beer in my hand. “I didn’t realize you two were still so close.”

She tilts her head at me, “We’re not. We were just catching up. He didn’t know that I lived here too.”

“Uh-huh, so you haven’t talked to him recently?”

She scoffs, crossing her arms over her chest. “What’s with the third degree, huh?”

“You didn’t answer my question,” I mutter.

“No, Connor. I haven’t talked to him recently. In fact, I haven’t talked to him since the breakup. But what does that matter? Why does it matter who I do and do not talk to?”

“I just think it’s a little strange that he came here tonight.”

“Well, I didn’t invite him, if that’s what you’re insinuating. He came with a friend. He didn’t even know it was our party, or our house. He just showed up.”

“So he crashed it. Classy.”

“What is your deal?” She pushes herself off the counter and stands face to face with me, her forehead creasing as she glares at me. I want to smooth the crease and tell her not to do that because she’ll get a headache, but I refrain. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Please,” she scoffs, “you’re acting like a jealous boyfriend! Newsflash, Connor, you’re not my boyfriend.”

I recoil, because sure I know I’m not, but the words spew from her lips like venom. “I know that.”

“Do you? Because right now it doesn’t seem like you do. Now unless I completely missed the part where you asked me to be your girlfriend, you have no right to be upset over me talking to my ex-boyfriend.”

“He was an ass to you then.”

“How would you know?! We weren’t even talking then.”

“Because you didn’t want to! I was still trying to fix things with us but you were pushing me away.”

“No, I wasn’t pushing you away. I was protecting myself from getting hurt again.”

“But it wasn’t me, that was Kenzie, and -”

She groans in frustration, “Why are we talking about her again? Why? I can’t do this.”

“Do what?”

Y/n pinches the bridge of her nose. “Look, you’re my best friend, and I love you. But you have no right to be upset about Noah. You are not my boyfriend -”

“Why do you keep saying that?”

“Because you aren’t! You like to act like you are sometimes, but you’re not.”

“Do you want me to be?!” I exclaim, setting my bottle down.

She scoffs, shaking her head. “Not like this,” she says quietly, pushing past me.

“Y/n!” I call after her, but she ignores me. I, however, can’t ignore the eyes that are on me.

---

“He’s jealous?” Alessia asks, leaning back on her hands. We’re sitting on the grass in the backyard. It’s quieter out here, and far less crowded. “Does he even have a right to be?”

“That’s what I’m saying! He’s my best friend, but sometimes he acts like he’s my boyfriend and I just - I’m over it.”

She sighs, “You’re over him acting like your boyfriend.”

“Yes,” I say.

“Because you want him to actually be your boyfriend.”

“What? No! No,” I shake my head, “that’s not it.”

Les smiles, “Honey, it’s obvious the way you two look at each other. And you can deny it because you’re best friends, you live together. You don’t want to risk the integrity of the friendship that you have. And that is totally reasonable, but you two need to discuss what you are to each other. Because it’s clear that in his mind, you’re a little bit more than just ‘best friends.’ And well, you’ve always wanted to be more, so what’s so wrong with him being that?”

I sigh and pick at the grass beside me, “I don’t know if he feels this way genuinely or if it’s because I’m closer now. We live together, it seems almost easy or convenient for him to develop some tiny crush because of the proximity.”

At this she laughs, “Oh, honey. That is definitely not it.”

“How do you know?”

“Because that boy has been in love with you since before I even met you guys. It’s written all over his face and if you took a second to just stop and -”

“Hey, sorry to interrupt, guys,” Shawn says, breathlessly, pushing his curls out of his face. “Y/n, Connor’s drunk off his ass, and I need your help”

I sit up, “Okay, How much did he drink?”

“Like, the entire bottle of tequila I had in my room, plus however many beers he had.”

I stand up, swatting at the backs of my legs to get off any dirt, “Is he throwing up?”

“No, he’s just asking for you.”

I nod and look back to Alessia, “We’ll talk later, Les?”

“Mhm, go take care of your boy.”

“Why did he drink so much?” I ask Shawn, following him toward the sliding glass door. 

He shrugs, “I asked him. He said you were mad at him.”

I roll my eyes, “Well yeah, he was being an ass. But it still doesn’t make sense.If he drinks every time I get upset with him, he’d be an alcoholic ”

“All I know is that he was asking for you,” Shawn says just as we find Connor sitting outside my bedroom door, nursing another beer bottle. 

I shake my head, “God, he knows not to be switching between alcohol.”

“Connor, buddy?” Shawn says, squatting down next to him. “I got her. Why don’t you give me that beer, eh?” He goes to take it from his hands, but Connor’s quick to move it, spilling a bit of it on his shirt in the process.

“No, this is mine. Get your own,” he slurs

I sigh and squat down next to him, too. “I think you’ve had enough, bub. Come on, let me have it.”

He looks at me with heavy eyes and he pouts, dramatically. “Y/n… you’re so pretty.”

“Connor,” I shake my head. 

“I love you in red. God, you look so good. Could never get,” he hiccups, “tired of looking at you.”

I blush, looking over at Shawn who’s still sitting with us. “Okay, come on. Let’s get up. We need to get you to bed.”

He nods slowly, “Whatever you want, baby.”

I take the drink out of his hand and set on the floor beside us. “Shawn, help me get him up.”

Shawn nods, “You got it.” He does most of the heavy lifting, but when Connor’s on his feet, he leans into me, hugging my waist, burying his head in my neck. 

“I’m so sorry, y/n. So sorry.”

“I know, come on now. We’re going to your room.”

He groans into my skin, but helps me and Shawn take him to his room as best as he can, only stumbling once when we round the corner. We push his bedroom door open and walk further into the room, plopping him down on the bed. 

“Thanks, Shawn. I got it from here.”

“You sure?” 

I nod, moving to grab his trash can from next to his desk. “Yeah, we’re good. Thanks for coming to get me.”

He nods, “Of course. Come get me if you need anything else.”

Connor groans as Shawn slams the door shut behind him. I sigh and move around the room, turning on his bedside lamp and going to his desk chair where his outfit from earlier is laid out. “Okay, bub, I’m gonna need you to help me out, alright? I need you to get out of your clothes, I’m gonna put you in pajamas, okay?”

He shakes his head, his pout even heavier than usual, eyes struggling to stay open. “Too tired. You do it.”

I close my eyes, taking in a deep breath. Of course he’s gonna be difficult right now. I shake my head, throwing his clothes beside him, “Can you stand up?”

He mumbles something incoherent, but I’m pretty sure it’s somewhere along the lines of “The room is spinning.”

“Fuck, Connor, why did you drink so much?” I grumble, moving to the floor to take his shoes off.

“You’re mad at me,” he whines.

“Yes, I am. You know your limits. What were you gonna do if this didn’t happen at the house, hmm?”

“M’sorry.”

I roll my eyes, “Okay, sit up,” I reach for his hands to help pull him to a sitting position. 

He makes an unnecessary amount of groaning sounds as he moves around to accommodate me.

I push his shirt off his shoulders, it’s almost damp, he’s sweating so much. I throw it to the side, I’ll put it in the laundry room when I go get him some pain meds in a little bit. I take hold of the hem of his tank top, “Arms up,” I pat his side and he obliges, looking up at me with a sad smile on his lips. “What’s wrong?” I ask him, tossing his tank top off to the side too.

“I’m sorry I got mad earlier. About Noah.”

I shake my head, “It’s fine. Lay back, lift your hips for me.”

He lays back, but his pout still remains on his face as I lean forward to unbutton his pants.

“What now?” I question softly, pulling down his zipper, “Hips up.”

He’s looking at me with such sad eyes and it’s killing me. “This isn’t how I wanted you to undress me for the first time.”

My breath hitches, “What?”

“Wanna make love to you,” he slurs. 

I almost choke on his words, “Connor, you’re drunk,” I shake my head, pulling his pants off him and grabbing his sweats to pull up his legs instead. I decide to forgo the shirt because he’s already sweating a lot, I don't want to make him even hotter. “You don’t know what you’re saying. I’m gonna go get you some water and pain meds. Stay here.” I move the trash can closer to him, “The trash is right next to you if you feel like you’re gonna get sick.

I pick up his discarded clothes from the floor and walk to the door and out the room before he can say anything else he doesn’t mean. After tossing them in the hamper in the laundry room, I squeeze past the group of people still congregating in the hallway. I slip into my room and grab some of my pain meds from my book bag and quickly slip out again to head to the kitchen which is also crowded. I mumble out a general excuse me, and go to the fridge to grab Connor a bottle of water. 

On my way back, I stop and go to his bathroom which is thankfully empty, and grab a hand towel and wet it under the faucet to hopefully cool him down a bit. When I’m back in his room, he’s laying face down on his bed and I stop for a minute, admiring his smooth skin, and the way the muscles in his shoulders tense up when he moves his arm above his head. It’s not fair. No one man should look this good. 

I shake my head, focusing back on the task at hand. I close the door behind me gently. “Okay, Connor. I need you to sit up just one more time to take these pills and then you can go to bed, yeah?”

He groans, “I think I drank too much, baby,” he mumbles, pushing himself up and I'm once again in awe of how his muscles move with him. 

I scratch at my scalp and nod, holding out the pills for him. “Yeah, I think you did, too.” He takes them in his hand and I sit next to him, uncapping the water bottle before handing it to him as well.

“Thank you,” he hiccups.

“You’re welcome.” I look down at my hands as he takes the pills. He goes to hand me the water bottle back but I shake my head, “You need to drink it all. We’re trying to avoid a hangover.”

He just holds the bottle in his lap, not moving to drink anymore of it, so I look back up at him only to find him already staring at me. 

“You okay?” I ask.

He hums and reaches forward. He runs his thumb under my eye, “You got an eyelash. I got it,” he mumbles, but he keeps his hand cradling the side of my face. 

My eyes search his tired ones, they’re glossed over, but they always get that way when he drinks, making his eyes seem just a little more blue than green. 

“Have I told you tonight that you look pretty?” he asks quietly. 

“Multiple times,” I confirm. 

“Good, because you are… so, so pretty.”

I lick my lips and watch his eyes move from my eyes to my lips and back. I take in a shallow breath as he starts to lean closer. His eyes closed as his face inches toward mine. I push him back gently just before his lips have the chance to connect with mine, and I mean just before because I could feel his breath against my mouth. “What are you doing?” I question.

“I was… I was trying to kiss you. Did you, I thought you wanted to - when we were laying in bed a couple weeks ago, you said you wanted me to kiss you.”

“Well, I… Connor,” I shake my head. I didn’t think he heard me when I said that. “Not like this. Not tonight. Not when you’re drunk and not thinking clearly.” I stand up, pacing slowly in front of him. “If you’re gonna kiss me, I want you to be sober, and to actually want to do it. Not just because we got in a fight earlier. I don’t want this to be something you do now and then completely forget about or ignore, or fuck, even worse, regret in the morning. I don’t want that. I don’t deserve that. I don’t deserve to be led on by you again.”

“Again?” He asks, tilting his head at me. 

“Nevermind. I should go back out there, start cleaning up so it’s not so much tomorrow.”

“Wait, y/n, please. Stay here, please. Stay with me tonight.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“I won’t try anything, I promise. Please, just stay?”

I sigh, “Just until you fall asleep.”

---

It’s nearing eleven in the morning when Shawn finally retreats from his room. He’s not nearly as hungover as I bet the other boys are going to be. If he’s even hungover at all, he doesn’t seem to be. 

He leans against the counter, watching me pull my second batch of cookies from the oven. “You’re stress baking,” he observes.

I scoff, “I made muffins too,” I nod in the direction of the counter in front of him where a plate of blueberry muffins sits. 

“Ooh,” he reaches forward and takes one, “Not that I like when you’re stressed, but this my favorite of your coping mechanisms.”

“For purely selfish, I presume.”

“Of course,” he says around a mouthful of muffin. “So,” he says after he swallows. “Does this sudden urge to bake have anything to do with what happened last night with Connor?”

I tense up at the memory of Connor leaning in to kiss me. Me pushing him away. “Maybe.”

“So what did happen after I left you two?”

“Nothing,” I shake my head.

“Well, the glorious smell of our kitchen and the spotless living room say otherwise.”

I close my eyes and rub my hands over my face. “He, god, he tried to kiss me.”

“What?” Shawn chokes. 

“Shh! You’ll wake them.”

“Oh please, Brain will be asleep until five. Nothing will wake him. He kissed you?! Well, how was it?”

“I said he tried. As in, I didn’t let him. I pushed him away before he could.”

“Why? Don’t you want him to?”

“Of course! But not like that! Not when he’s drunk and not himself. WHen he’s saying stupid things like he wants to make love to me, and that he wishes I was undressing him for the first time under different circumstances.”

“What? He said all of that?! Oh my god! Go, Connor!”

“No, not go Connor. Because he’s not going to remember any of this when he wakes up and I’m going to remember everything and have to pretend that he didn’t say anything or try to kiss me. And I’m stuck being led on once again, except this time he lives just down the hall and I have to see him everyday.”

Shawn sighs, “Okay, you’re right. So, what are you going to do?”

“Same thing I always do.”

He nods, “I’ll get my guitar.”

***

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[omiscurls]

hmm this is like my first time responding to a request thing so here goes: (slight webtoon spoilers!!)—- imagine if you/reader finds out about kaeyas secret accidentally, before he told diluc. how would he react to that? i’ve given some thought into it and i’d love to see your perspective!

dark whispers

plot: hurt/comfort, reader finds out about kaeya's secret before anyone else

contains: kaeya

warnings: WEBTOON SPOILERS, the story takes place before the start of the game, approximately 5-6 years, alcohol, acting under the influence, you can even say underage drinking, curse words

the sun had long set behind the mountains adoring the territories of mondstadt city. it's people had already closed their shops, workshops and businesses, having gone home to their families, many of them possibly already drifting off to sleep.

some individuals, as everyday, be it a workday, weekend, or a holiday, decided to go entertain themselves with different kinds of alcohol at the local tavern.

but to some of the mondstadt folk, that day, that evening was a special one, for it was a celebration of the ever so famous master crepus' adoptive son, kaeya, turning seventeen.

the night fell special even for regular customers, not only the ones celebrating, for it was rare for the master of the dawn winery himself to pour drinks and serve them at his establishment. for the birthday of his son, though, he had abandoned his normal nightly duties, and stood behind the counter for a good couple of hours, giving one speech and joining everyone in singing happy birthday for the young knight.

he had gone home around an hour ago, leaving the happy, slightly drunk bunch of customers in the hands of a younger bartender.

"alright" kaeya's older brother, and cerpus' firstborn, diluc, had made everyone quiet with the way he clapped his hands, a sly smirk on his lips as he looked his friend and brother in the eyes. diluc, being older, already knew the taste and... other qualities of alcohol a little better than the blue-haired boy, so he found nothing but amusement in the way kaeya couldn't find balance on his chair, or in how his eyes just wouldn't focus on one spot, instead wandering around the walls and ceiling of the tavern. "kaeya" he called out, making the boy face him with a dumbfounded look. "you're one round of shots behind me"

kaeya's expression changed to distressed within seconds, as he examined the three glasses before his eyes, wondering if he'll even fit those in his stomach.

"is yer head made out of stone or sum?" he slurred out "how're ya this sober?"

diluc laughed, pointing to the glasses.

"less complaining, more bottoming these out" he rushed, arms crossing at his chest, as he leaned back on his chair and observed his little brother struggle to make the decision.

"go to hell" kaeya mumbled, emptying the drinks one by one, a grimmace coming to his face right after he had laid the last glass back on the table. "what even is that?" he asked, unamused, as diluc responded happily:

"firewater."

a smile of satisfaction painted the redhead's face.

"what?" kaeya's eyes widened "how'd you even get this past father?" he leaned lower on the table, studying diluc's expression. „that’s like, forty percent sheer alcohol!”

"i have my ways" he responded enigmatically, and kaeya shook his head in resignation.

"aight" the birthday boy took a deep breath "your turn. ya don't want to loose now, do you?" remains of a grin lifted the point of his mouth, as diluc chuckled, pouring the transparent liquid into the glasses yet again.

"what's the prize?" you asked one of their friends, having come late to the scene of the challenge.

"oh, the one to loose has to do the other's chores for a month" the guy responded, eyes not darting away from how diluc managed to empty all three glasses, much to kaeya's dispair.

hours had passed, and everyone slowly left the birthday party, diluc leaving kaeya in your hands, as he helped the bartender clean up the mess the young knights had made. you asked the blue-haired boy if he wanted to get some fresh air, to which he nodded, you can't say eagerly, but nodded nonetheless. so that leaves you to where you were now, slowly walking towards your place, kaeya bumping into your side every now and then as he lost balance.

"did you have fun?" you asked happily, eyes focusing on his face, waiting for a response.

"yea" he murmured, not even sparing you a look.

"poor you, are you that wasted?" you continued, amused, as a hiccup left his throat.

"'m not wasted" he denied instantly. " 't was nice to spend some time with diluc, we all know i don't have much of that left"

your eyebrows furrow in confusion, as you stop in your tracks, making him stop, too. he seemed to have thought this was a normal thing to say, and politely waited for you to start walking again, but you didn't, instead crossing your arms, and asking again.

"what do you mean by that?"

he scoffed, almost rudely. " he's gon' hate me for life, isn't it obvious?" he slurred, head lifting to look on the starry sky, hands going deeper inside his pockets. your expression turned even more confused, as he stared up, acting like it was the most natural thing to say, and like everybody knew this.

"what's he gonna hate you for? he's your brother, he loves you deeply, right?" you wanted to rub his arm, or something, do anything to soothe the feelings that must've been eating him alive, but stayed still.

"brother" he scoffed again. you couldn't possibly see, from the angle his head was at, but hot tears flooded his eyes as he said the word out loud, and the moment of silence that came after, he used to calm down even the slightest bit. "i think that's the most beautiful lie i ever came up with, y'know? brother." he repeated.

"what- what do you mean by that?"

"i've been nothing but a useless homewrecker to his family for as long as i have been in this world. how did i ever find the audacity to call myself his brother? oh my, even i hate my guts for this." he chuckled, painful irony overflowing his voice "and my dearest, short-tempered diluc is gonna flip the fuck out, for sure"

"kaeya" you asked, growing to be scared of how mysteriously he was acting "is there anything you wish to tell me?"

you swallowed a gulp in your throat by saying that, and awaited the reply in stress, even if you didn't know why.

his gaze finally came down from the sky, as he looked at you with a sad smile.

"if it was up to me, i'd wish not to tell a soul anything. but i have been lying for far to long, and my so-called family did nothing to deserve that. nothing, nothing bad, ever, and yet they've been cursed to deal with one like me. truly unfair, the fate of this world. how kindness pays off in nothing but sorrow."

you could tell he was a bit more sober by how his words were more understandable than before, but he was still far from his right mind. you would've stopped him, but there was really no going back now, and you almost needed to hear what secret he was talking about.

"my dearest" he said, addressing you "please, do not get angry with me as well. i don't know what i'd do if i lost even more people than i intend to with this information."

after you nodded in confusion, he explained the story, briefly and in a twisted way, having little control over his slurred words.

you stood there in silence for a good long while as silent tears rolled down from both yours and his eyes.

"i'm sorry" he finally mumbled "i'm sorry, i swear i didn't do what i was designed to do, i didn't tell anyone anything, i didn't attempt to harm anyone. it wasn't my decision to make, i swear, i hold no loyalties to-"

"kaeya" you interrupted him, and he feared for the worst. "that must've been so confusing for the little kid you were"

the worried tone of your voice, the way your words were covered in affection, the way your eyes seemed to care, it all flooded his wrecked soul all too quickly and all to strongly, making him gasp for air, as if it was knocked out of his lungs.

"you- you don't think i'm a-"

"no" you interrupted again, afraid of how he might finish the sentence. "and neither will diluc. i can't promise you he won't be mad, because he probably will, but you're brothers, by blood or not. you're gonna fight and you're gonna make up, because no anger will ever top the love i'm sure he has for you. and if rougher days are really coming your way" you said, approaching him to wrap your arms around his shaky form. "then i'll stand by you to face them with you."

little did you both know. the date of diluc ragnvidr’s 18th was approaching faster than anyone could ever anticipated.

[hxt1b]

Know Your Type

Jaehyun x Reader 

Requested Prompt 21 "you want me to go out with him" 

Genre: Angst, College AU

Warning: Swearing, Smut 

WC: 2.3k

Masterlist 

Prompt List, for any requests you guys may have. I'm currently taking them again!

A/N: I apologize for the grammatical issues I did read it over but some things may have still slipped through. 

I hope you guys like this, please let me know what you think! Feedback is appreciated. 

"I know what type of guys you like." Jaehyun boasted. You scoffed at him, he most definitely did not. 

"Fine then point at a guy you want me to go out with. Since you know my type so well. If you guess right I'll ask him out." You challenged. It wasn't that Jaehyun didn't know you. He did, he just didn't know who you liked because you couldn't look at him and tell him it was, in fact, him. 

Too many thoughts would go through your head every time you thought about telling him. The fact that he could reject you and then you'd lose a friend was terrifying to you. So you stayed quiet. 

"Him," Jaehyun said and pointed at a boy across the room, he was tucked into the corner an unlit cigarette hanging from his lips as he tapped away at his phone. 

You knew him, Lucas was a great guy. A great guy with a girlfriend. 

"You want me to go out with him?"  You couldn't help but laugh, your shoulder bumped into his as you did. 

"He has a girlfriend." You said, "Plus he's not the guy I like." Jaehyun froze next to you. 

"You like someone?" 

Suddenly the couch you were sitting on wasn't big enough for the two of you. You didn't realize you'd said that, he'd just been trying to demonstrate your type. 

"No." 

"But you said you did." 

You couldn't reply to that. So you just stared at him as his face lit up. 

"Tell me who." He said his face getting closer to yours. 

"No." You deadpanned, and he frowned. 

"I bet you I can get you to tell if you have enough shots." You narrowed your eyes at his challenge again. Before you let him know that it was game on. 

This was how you and Jaehyun worked. Playful bets placed practically all the time, every little aspect of life was a game, and honestly, you liked it that way. You liked the way he laughed when he won, the dimply smiles that would adorn his face for the rest of the day. You liked the way he pouted when he lost, the complaining that would ensue was also something you wouldn't change. You liked the way he answered your phone and if he missed the call he called back within seconds. You liked that he called you randomly sometimes, a random 'I bet…' followed by something insane would leave his mouth and you'd always play into it. You liked him, everything about him and you loved your friendship. It was hard but you wouldn't ever tell him you liked him. Because you couldn't give him up. 

Jaehyun and you sat in a random room in the house, a huge bottle of vodka in-between you. The bottle was once full, you'd and Jaehyun had drank a considerable amount. 

"So Y/N, who do you like?" Jaehyun asked his words slightly slurred, the effects of the alcohol in full force. You stared at him, taking in the lift of his mouth as he smirked at you, the way his left dimple appeared as he did so. 

You unconsciously were leaning into him. 

"And if I tell you what do I get?" You asked your hand digging into the carpet in between you as your weight settled onto it. 

Jaehyun lowered his head to yours so that his nose was almost brushing yours. 

"You get to know that your best friend in the whole wide world will wingman you." 

"And what if that meant you'd be wing manning me for yourself?" You asked, your voice soft as the words left you. 

Jaehyun looked at you slowly registering the words that left you. Anxiety rolled in your stomach as you watched him blink at you. 

Fuck.

Fuck. 

Fuck. 

You knew you shouldn't have told him. 

Jaehyun cleared his throat as leaned away from him. 

"You like me?" He asked, you turned your head away from him. Suddenly all the alcohol in your system was gone. You slowly nodded, not being able to look back at him. 

He cleared his throat again, the silence was drowning you as the discomfort in the room grew. Eventually, Jaehyun pulled his phone out of his pocket. Tapping at his screen a few times as he got up. 

"So I- I just got a text from Jungwoo he needs me." You closed your eyes. 

Fuck vodka. 

"I'll see you tomorrow." 

But you didn't.

You didn't see him for a week. The first day you left him alone, the second day you thought maybe something had happened considering Jungwoo had called him that night. So you texted him, he didn't reply. You texted him again only to be left on read. The third day you tried calling him, that failed as well. You very quickly realized he was ignoring you. 

He came into your shared class on Wednesday followed by Jungwoo, and they sat with you. But Jungwoo sat in the middle and Jaehyun left halfway through the class. You didn't try after that, you didn't know how. 

Your head hurt that day because you couldn't help but cry. You knew you were right not to tell him, you knew you were right about the fact that the moment you told him you'd lose him. 

The opening of your apartment door drew you from your thoughts. Doyoung walked in holding a bag of takeout in his hand. 

"You look like shit." He said as his eyes swept over you. You laughed at his words. 

"Thanks." 

Doyoung set the takeout on the coffee table before heading into your kitchen to grab cutlery. 

"He ignored me in class on Wednesday." You said as you looked down at your hands. Your eyes stinging again. 

"You'd think that he would know how to act like an adult. If he doesn't like you back he doesn't have to cut you off." 

You nodded, but he had. Because that was how Jaehyun was. 

"Every girl I become friends with always ruins it by falling in love with me," Jaehyun grumbled as he sat across from you. 

"Humble." You muttered. 

"I'm not joking like I don't mean it as a prick. I just mean I want someone I can be friends with, without them wanting to suck my dick." You looked at him your eyebrows raising. 

Eventually, you rolled your eyes, a chuckle leaving you. "You want a girl to not want you for sex. How ironic."  

"Listen I sleep with girls," He started. 

"A lot go girls," You interjected  

"But I don't pretend to be their friend." He finished. 

"Such a saint you are Jaehyun." 

You weren't close back then, you grew close though over the year since then. To the point that you were inseparable. Until now. 

"Whatever forget him, let's drown in food," Doyoung said, he didn't make it to the couch before the apartment door was opening again. 

Only two people besides you had a key, one of them was already in the apartment. 

You stared at Jaehyun as he looked at Doyoung. 

"Oh, you're here." He said. 

"Yes, I'm here," Doyoung replied. 

"Sorry, I shouldn't have just shown up I guess." He said and retreated out of the apartment. You stared at Doyoung, who let out a loud sigh. 

"Okay fine, go after him. I'm going to start eating though." You nodded as you shot out of your spot on the couch. 

Slipping into a pair of flip flips you charged out the door. The elevator closed as you rounded the corner. So you settled for the stairs. 

You looked crazy, you knew you did. You were wearing an oversized t-shirt with stains on it, you weren't wearing any pants you just had on your underwear. Your eyes were swollen from the crying earlier, and your hair was up in a messy bun. Well, half of it was. 

You stopped to breathe as you hit the main floor, your throat hurting from your lack of air. Somewhere in your brain, you were looking at yourself wondering what the fuck you were doing. But at the forefront of your mind was Jaehyun. 

You pushed out the doors seeing him walking to his car. 

"Hey!" You called running down the few steps as he stopped right beside his car. 

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" You asked loudly, as you charged towards him. 

"I-" You cut him off before he could even truly start. 

"No actually, fuck you. You ignored me for a week. Then you chose to show up without a text, let alone a call. So what I told you I liked you and that's it? You forced me to tell you!"  

You were frantic, and angry and needed to yell at him because if you weren't yelling you would cry. You didn't even care if the people sitting in their apartments heard the commotion and looked out. 

Jaehyun stood silently in front of you fiddling with his keys. 

"Am I really that awful, that if I did like you the only option you'd have is; run away?" You asked, finally letting your voice quiet down as your confidence faded. Your brain being hit with the fact that he may have come to grab his things. The few things he'd left around your apartment. Like his hoodie, his many pairs of socks, the t-shirt you were in right now. 

"No," He finally answered. His eyes finally coming up to your face. 

"Then why have you been ignoring me?" You asked, your eyes stinging again as you tried not to cry. 

Jaehyun took a step towards you, grabbing your arm and pulling you into him. You let him. 

"I had to think. I needed to think about what you said." He said, his head resting on top of yours. You thought about pushing him away. You thought about storming back into your apartment and leaving him here, but you wanted to be in his arms you couldn't push away. So instead you grabbed his t-shirt tightly and pulled him closer to you. 

"I like you too, Y/N." He spoke softly, "I was just shocked when you said it to me at the party. I didn't know how to react so I ran. I'm so sorry for ignoring you. I know I'm a dick. I know I'll have to make it up to you and I will." 

"You were shocked so you decided that not talking to me was the way to go?" You asked, your voice muffled into his chest. 

"I never said I was smart." He said making you softly giggle. 

"You like me?" You asked turning your head up and looking at him. He nodded down at you. 

"Yes." 

Maybe you were too quick to give in, maybe you weren't. All you knew was that a week's worth of trouble boiled down to a few words and you weren't willing to draw it out any longer. You could talk about it more later if you wanted to right now you just wanted him to hold you. You hadn't seen him for a week and you hated it. 

He pressed his lips to yours gently, cautiously. But you quickly deepened the kiss, letting your tongue move across his bottom lip before letting him push his tongue against yours. 

You moaned softly against him, your arms snaking around his neck as you pulled him closer to you. Jaehyun hit the side of the car as you two continued to kiss, his hands moving to your ass and pulling you flush against him. You could feel him hardening between you both. Your hips moving on their own grinding against him. 

His lips left your mouth leaving hot kisses down the side of your jaw. 

"It's cold." You whined as the cold air hit the trail of saliva he was leaving in his wake. Pulling his face away from you he unlocked his car. 

"Doy-" 

"He can wait." He said as he pulled open the back door and ushered you in. He scrambled in after you pulling you onto his lap as he did so. 

"Fuck your so hot." He said. You giggled down at him. 

"I'm in a stained t-shirt." You said as Jaehyun's hands crawled underneath it finding your boobs. You moaned when his cold fingers pinched at your nipples. 

Your hands went to his crotch, palming him through his sweats drawing soft grunts from him. You looked up at his face as he moved his hands to your face bringing your mouth back down to his. 

You pulled his erection out of his sweats bringing him to your clothed core and rubbing the head of his cock against yourself. Jaehyun hissed at your actions, his hand moving to the nape of your neck. 

Jaehyun's other hand moved towards your core, pushing your underwear aside so that he could feel you on his cock. He bucked his hips up towards you. You moaned against him as he began to move between your folds coating his cock in your slick. 

The tip of his dick hitting your clit with every move he made. Your mouth moved away from his, panting you looked down at where he was moving against you. 

"Fuck." You muttered. Your head spinning with each of his movements. 

A loud knocking on his car window scared you, your hands pulling Jaehyun to you as you both look out the car window. 

Doyoung was staring down at you both. 

"I'm going home." He said loud enough for you both to hear. "You two can move upstairs." 

You laughed down at Jaehyun as Doyoung walked away. 

"Were you going to leave after you fucked me?" You asked as you moved off him. Your brain going back to thinking in overdrive. Jaehyun grabbed your wrist pulling your hand to him and forcing you to look at him. His cock tucked away now. 

"I'm sorry I ignored you. I do not plan on doing it again. I swear." You nodded at him and got out of the car, waiting for him to follow you. 

"So you know what type of guys I like huh?" You asked as he used his key to get into your building. 

"Yeah babe, you like douche bags." He said and smiled down at you, dimples and all. You bit the corner of your lip to try to not laugh. Yet you laughed anyway. 

[lavvs]

Seriously? { Rafe Cameron x Reader}

Summary; In which a game of spin the bottle at a party goes wrong.

Warning(s); Angst, angst, angst, mature language, kind of mature scenes idk?

Word Count; 1.2k

quick disclaimer this isn’t a gif this is part of an edit from tiktok @papayax03

Flashbacks in cursive

Rafe didn't know if it was the shit-ton of cocaine fucking with his mind right now, making him mad,

Maybe even the arguments he recently gets himself into with his father,

Or the fact that his girlfriend was about to kiss his best friend,

All he knew was that he had to get the hell out of this party.

The loud echo of the banging music behind you rings in your head as you sloppily run out, beer in hand, following your boyfriend. Unhumorously laughing,

"Rafe come on I wasn't actually going to kiss him!" You try and shout after him

It didn't take long for the rest of your group to come out the two big doors behind you.

"I have an idea," Sarah called out, observing the two boys do lines off the table.

You were all sat around a big coffee table. You, being placed on Rafe's lap before he decided to do lines with Topper, which Sarah was next to. Kelce was sat with his hand around some Touron girl- that he couldn't get his hands off. And two other Blond chicks that decided to join with the fun,

"Yeah? And what's that?" Kelce laughed, turning to the pretty blond,

"Oh you know.. we could all play spin-the-bottle," She smirked, facing you, raising her eyebrows.

"I'm down," you grinned against the top of the glass beer bottle, not noticing your waist was being firmly gripped by two strong hands, placing you back on your boyfriends lap.

Whilst everyone agreed and talked before playing, you zoned out as soft- yet needy kisses were planted on your neck.

You looked back at Rafe with doey eyes, begging for more- almost forgetting your friends- when he went back down hit your soft-spot, watching your eyes roll back but at the same time close.

"My good girl," He whispered huskily in your ear, nibbling your earlobe.

"Rafe-" You quietly whimper as you grab his cheek to make him face you. You look straight into his eyes as you go in for a kiss

When he kissed back- the kiss was possessive- to show you who's you are.

You didn't know when it happened but you felt a cold hand on your inner thigh- moving upwards, slowly-

"Get a room," Topper laughed "Come on we're starting the game."

You weren't going to lie, you were really drunk.. and high. Actually, you've never been this drunk at a party, because most of the time Rafe didn't let you have more than 4 drinks, but that wasn't the case right now,

You didn't know what to do.

You knew you would never cheat on Rafe. You loved him. He was the only one that knew things about you no one else knew. You trusted him with your life.. even though sometimes Rafe would take the anger out on you, but you knew he didn't mean it,

Still, it hurt sometimes,

"Rafe baby-" you slurred out as you got closer. The music fading out more and more, the alcohol slowly loosing it's affects, as you took in your surroundings.

Suddenly he stopped, turning around aggressively, looking straight at you, "No- No- you know what? I've had enough of this!" He said motioning his index finger between you and him,

The others were back at the front entrance, just staring at the scene that was evolving in front of them.

"What do you mean?" you questioned, raising your voice- walking closer to him,

"You were about to fucking kiss him Y/n!" He fumed, bringing his hand for it to entangle in his dark blonde hair for a second

When you’re arguing with each another it is as if you have forgotten who you are and what you are to one another.

That's the problem with Rafe going full "Angry,”. He smashes everything up. If he does that faster than he can rebuild, well, then you can figure out how all this will end, right?

“I’d never do that-“ you looked at him as if he was crazy- which he was. You didn’t like that he thought of you so lowly

“Well the problem is Y/n, you just fucking did, alright- I mean-“ you couldn’t take anymore of this, but little did you know what you were about to say was going to change your relationship for the next 24 hours.

“Are you kidding me, Rafe?” you scoffed, “Are you even listening to what you’re saying? What happened when one of those blond chicks was dared to kiss you the other night, huh?” you yelled back, more than fuming,

If looks could kill you’d definitely be dead by now,

“I mean come on, you didn’t even push her off when it was clear that she wanted more! For fucks sake Rafe! You even kissed her back!” your voice cracked a little,

Rafe scoffed, beyond angry, “Seriously? You know Y/n, i’m so sick of you not being able to come to fucking terms that i don’t give a shit about you. All you do is complain how no body gets you- and you know-“

he laughed unhumorously,

“I don’t give a shit about your problems. It’s suffocating how I have to deal with all the fucked up shit you drag me into. At the end of the day your just a good fuck.”

Tears streamed down your flushed cheeks, choking on your own sobs, “Rafe, you don’t mean that…” though you couldn’t tell if you were trying to convince yourself or him,

“Leave.” he said unemotionally. “I don’t love you Y/n, so you might aswell bother someone else who has time to deal with your emotional shit.”

You couldn’t find the strength to wipe away your tears. Your legs felt like they would collapse any second, but you knew you couldn’t fall in the middle of someone’s lawn. So you moved your feet, them now feeling 10x more heavier as you went to your car. Tears blurring your vision making it hard to see. You didn’t even bother to spare your friends a glance,

Just wanting to get the fuck away from this place.

Back next to the two doors the group stood there shocked. They knew you and Rafe argued a lot but it has never come to something like this. Sarah placed her hand over her hanging jaw tears daring to spill across her own face when she saw her best friend drive off in sorrow. They just all hoped none of you would make a stupid decision whilst in grief.

Your hands gripped the steering wheel as broken sobs escaped your mouth. You couldn’t believe it. Was that what Rafe really thought of you?

You brung one hand to wipe away the tears harshly. They were blocking your vision even more now. If Rafe was here he would argue with you how your not going to drive and he would through a mini tantrum until you let him drive,

You let out a small chuckle whilst still crying your eyes out. You turned around to look down at your phone in your passenger seat next to you.

It was bowing up with different kinds of messages, you went to go silence it when a long loud beep was made in front of you. Your eyes widened when you released what your current situation was-

Next thing you know- all you could see was darkness.

[kpoptwitches]

Since requests are open, please write a drabble on reader falling for Mafia Yoongi and Yoongi trying to push her away but finally gives in. 🤐🤐 it felt like a nice plot in my head but now that I wrote it out, it feels kinda weird to ask for a mafia fluff 😂🤦‍♀️ feel free to ignore if you find this to be stupid.

|| No, not at all! Thank you for your request, I love the idea. The beginning is kinda long, but I hope you enjoy!🌻 ||

I’m Won’t Let You Go

Pairing: Mafia!Yoongi x reader

It all started out as fun and games. Meaningless sex. Occasional hookups.

Yoongi would show up at your house anywhere between the hours of 2 A.M. to 5 A.M. All the hookups, it never meant anything. He would leave without saying a word. Only to disappear and reappear a few weeks, maybe even months later. It never really mattered to you.

That is until things slowly began changing. His visit became more frequent. Yoongi started showing up outside your work to make sure you got home safely. Of course, he never told you why. He would listen to you complain about your day, nodding every so often. He would listen to you moan about your pig of a boss. How he would gradually make your work uniform shorter. How he would eye you up and embarrass you in front of the other staff. And all Yoongi did was listen, or so you thought. You went into work for your next shift, and saw your boss with a broken nose. Dark black rings circling both his eyes. A busted lip. No perverted comment was sent your way. He never even looked at you. For the first time in a long time, your boss stopped harassing you.

Things started changing when you yearned for his touch. The same touch that sent ablaze erupting under your skin. The same touch that sent shivers coursing through your body. You found the scent of his cologne oddly comforting. You began wishing he would stay the night, just so you could curl up against him just a little longer. Your heart started aching each time you woke up to an empty bed.

Things started changing when you began wanting more than just meaningless hookups.

You thought things were looking up when Yoongi invited you out to club one Saturday night. The only rule; don’t bring any other guys along. You obliged, not caring enough about other men anyways. You spent the night drinking, dancing your heart away, and of course, shacking up with the wanted criminal.

And like always, by the end of the night, he made sure you bring you home safely.

Your face was tucked into the back of his neck, legs loosely wrapped around his waist. His hands gripped your thighs as he carried you up the stairs to your apartment.

“Hey, Yoongi,” you drunkenly slurred, “I hurt myself.”

He sighed, “How did you hurt yourself, Y/n?”

You giggled, lifting your head up to whisper in his ear.

“Don’t you know .. I scrapped my knee falling for you.”

Yoongi couldn’t help the small smile that formed due to your corniness. You’re always such a handful, especially after a night of drinking.

“You’re drunk,” he curtly replied.

A pout formed across your lips, “Gosh! You’re so stupid, I’m being serious! I really fell for you, Yoongi.”

For a split second, he paused. His face expressionless. You didn’t mean that. You can’t mean that. Without saying another word, he helped you into your apartment, dropping your body onto the couch. He tossed a blanket at you then disappeared into the kitchen. He returned shortly after with a glass of water and a pain killer and placed it down on the coffee table. He went to walk away until your hand reached out, gripping onto his sleeve.

“Stay with me, please,” you muttered, eyes slowly falling shut.

He silently agreed, finding himself unable to say ‘no’ to you. He sat down on the floor beside the couch, resting his head against the arm. You moved your hand from his sleeve down to his hand, interlacing your fingers with his. A sleepy grin formed on your lips, and you drifted off to sleep.

***

Everything was cold when you woke up the next morning. The blanket had fallen onto the floor, exposing your skin to the chill in the air. Everything around you seemed darker than normal, almost gloomy, perfectly mirroring the feelings swirling around in your chest. Just as you mentally predicted, Yoongi was no where to be seen.

The glass of water and pain killer still remained on the coffee table, completely untouched. If it wasn’t for your memories of last night, you would have thought Yoongi was never even here.

***

Nearly a week had passed by with no sign of Yoongi. He wouldn’t return any texts. He didn’t show up at your apartment during ungodly hours of the night. He never even appeared outside your work to drive you home.

You huffed, shoving your hands into your pockets of your jacket. Yet another night you have to take the dreaded walk home. The moon was high in the sky, but the light it gave off barely illuminated the sidewalk in front of you.

You looked up from glaring the pavement to see a familiar figure leaning against the wall, just a few steps ahead. You hadn’t noticed him before.

“Yoongi?” your voice called out, confused.

You watched as he pushed himself off the wall, taking small steps towards you. His lips were pressed together in a small thin line, but you noticed the whirl of complex emotions in his eyes.

“I need you to stay away from me, Y/n. Stop texting. Stop calling.”

You stood stunned, lips slightly parted in a silent gasp. Stay away from him? Annoyance started to creep in, your eyes slowly shifted into a glare.

“Really,” you scoffed, “You came here just to tell me that? After pretending like I never existed for a week?”

“Y/n, I mean it,” he replied, ignoring your questions.

Crossing your arms, you closed the gap between you two, your noses practically touching.

“What? Are you getting all discombobulated because I drunkenly confessed?”

His tongue poked his cheek in irritation. You obviously hit a nerve, or maybe even bruised his fragile little ego.

After a few seconds, Yoongi finally spoke, “Watch how you speak to me, sweetheart.”

“Or what?” you fired back, a bold smirk toying on your lips.

Annoyance and frustration was evident in both your eyes. You observed as his eyes slowly flickered down to your lips for only a split second. Before you knew what you were doing, you spoke up again, catching Yoongi off guard.

“If you want to kiss me then do it, but if not, then leave. And you’ll never hear from me again.”

Yoongi seemed as if he was contemplating, weighing different pros and cons. You scoffed again, taking a few steps away.

“Forget it, I’ll make the decision for you.”

You turned to step past him until his hand sprung out, catching your forearm. He pulled you back to your spot in front of him, then crashed his lips onto yours. The kiss was passionate, it was as if he was he was telling you everything he wanted to with one simple action. After what seemed like forever, he finally pulled away, eyes half closed and nearly breathless.

“You just don’t seem to get it, princess. I’m bad for you. In every way possible.”

“You don’t seem to understand,” you fired back, “I don’t care how bad you think you are.”

He chuckled at your response, “If that’s how you feel then fine, but after this, I’ll never let you go.”

“Who said I wanted you to?” You tilted your head to the side, in an almost teasing manner.

You felt his hands slip to the back of your thighs, lifting you off the pavement. In response, you wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him in for another heated kiss. Your back was pressed against the cool brick wall while one of Yoongi’s hand slid under the fabric of your thin t-shirt. His lips left yours, slowly trailing down to your neck.

“Yoongi,” you moaned, feeling his teeth nipping at the sensitive skin, “People might see us.”

It was his turn to smirk, pulling away just enough to look into your eyes.

“Let them watch, babygirl. I want everyone to see that you’re now mine.”

[muffindaddystyles]

prompt 1 with older brothers best friends!harry 👀

1. “Everyone keeps telling me you’re the bad guy.”

8. “I said stop staring at me.”

23. “I have a name and it’s not sweetheart.”

Third wheeling could never be fun. Not when you’re basically not even a wheel but an invisible person on a vacation watching couples kiss and yada yada.

“For fuck's sake.” Y/N grumbles changing a side snatching the blanket that got stuck under her and sandwiches her face into a pillow when she hears the steel roof atop her creak furiously accompanied by high pitched obnoxious moans.

Y/N's brother brought her along to their Italy trip, his wife’s bestfriend and his own bestfriend tagged along too leaving only Y/N to grump about their wild sex rendezvous.

She’s sleepless, homesick and probably about to get a stomach bug for living in yacht for four days atleast!

What’s so fun about jiggling in your sleep? None perhaps and the waves crashing at night that threatens you to swallow you down to the pit of ocean --- my pal, nothing is entertaining about it. Atleast for Y/N. She’s more of a hill station going person with her pup Frankenstein that oogles out from his small globe like window, comfy in his lil bag that Y/N moves around on her shoulders everywhere.

When the fracas of whatever’s taking place up doesn’t comes to halt, Y/N had enough, she isn’t very versed in coping with such situations since her dorm-mate is very nice.

So, she’s throwing the lid away to pop her head through the square like space and spreads her elbows up the roof, “Aish.” She immediately covers her eyes upon the sight of his brother and his wife doing it.

Their expressions comically panicked as they embarrassingly scrambles to clutch the flimsy sheets over them.

“Who does it all naked under an open sky?” She squeaks out, feeling her pulse tick and she peeks out towards the darkness from the slight gap of her fingers which are barely helping her avoid the scene that’d haunt her for life.

“Them bunnies and monkeys, ‘n many of our kind, Sweetheart.” She rolls her eyes at the familiarity of deep slow rumble that’s a bit slurred, probably from the Tequila they took with them. The voice never fails to froth bubbles in Y/N's tummy and it always involuntarily makes her nails dig into her palms.

Harry and Tina’s bestfriend went out to roam around Italy, or they told so and Albeit Y/N very well knows their intentions were more to exploring the city she didn’t butt in.

“I’ve a name and it’s not, Sweetheart.” She dismisses him with a grumble and his smirk shines through the shadow aggravating Y/N to an extreme she slips down shutting the door (like lid) at the them.

Harry Styles. Y/N's brother’s bestfriend. He’s everything Y/N loathes about. Bright green eyes, silken features and that dopey pearlish smile that makes everyone fall in love with him in nano-seconds.

To Y/N. He is an incubus. A witch that allures people without even knowing.

He’s a narcissistic asshole and Y/N's bad boy dream, unfortunately.

She hates herself for having a puppy crush on him for years now.

That friggin, Asshole.

He’s with everyone but her. It seems as if he’s getting stung by bees upon the mere closeness between them. A lamb ready to bite her down his stomach if she steps a foot near him.

At the moment when she’s sitting with her knees pressed to her chest, swollen eyes and puffy lips from not getting sleep last night.

She’s really hating that Harry looks so hot from the swim he just took as he dries himself sitting opposite to her. The droplets twinkling on his tanned thick body, his trunks wrinkled and bunched up into his thighs baring the tiger tattoo on front, his hair wet and oh so fucking tug-able – Y/N feels like Rachel from friends thinking all of that.

“Stop staring,” She mutters out loud when he wouldn’t stop licking the saltiness from his pink bottom lip keeping his intense gaze on her.

“What did y'say?” He pretends that we too engulfed in something else.

“I said stop staring at me.” Y/N grits. It’s annoying because it’s making her belly feel funny and loopy.

“The hills behind y'are just s'admirable.” He elevates his shoulders a bit panicked from inside and Y/N forced herself to not to twitch her eye when his chest muscles flexes due to his action.

Bamboozled she takes a glance from her shoulder to where he diverted his sight once she caught him. Her nose scrunched up and chin butted in disgust at the scenery, “That’s literally a heap of dead fishes!”

“Better than starin’ into a dead soul.” His lips down turned into a careless grimace and Y/N gasps out loud pushing the strands of her hair sticking to all of her face because of the breeze gush, “Why would you say that!?”

“’Cos you’re so mauve, that’s why?” He just wants to take a piss out of her. Nobody’s around and he’s finally getting time to talk to her even if it just to sit cross legged on her nerves and sip tea.

He’s actually lying. He thinks she’s more than mauve. She’s all those colours that usually macarons have, all those hues that butterflies wings have and all those tinctures that one find in gems then keep them safe.

She’s the colour he misses in his life.

“And you’re so fucking blue!” She grumbles and that slithered a deep wicked smile on Harry’s lips, “Like this deep ocean yer afraid of?” Her eyes widens at that and she almost lunges on her knees.

How did he know? Ofcourse, he'd. He’s everywhere. In every damn picture of wherever they went for recreation.

“I’m not.” She scoffs, her tone inconvenient and hazy as she shrinks into herself.

“Then take a dip,” She wishes that she could wipe that beautiful stupid smirk off his gorgeous stupidly lame face.

“Kiss my ass.” She spat out throwing a cushion towards him that lands on his lap, “I’d love to.” He barks out a laugh that rings through the waves.

“You’re such a stinky asshole.” She hits him with another that dumps against his chest, “Ow!” He feigns hurt with ridiculous comical expressions and throws the cushion back towards her which she successfully dodges, but, it falls behind her into the water.

“Shit.” She complains ducking around the edge of the yacht and stretches her arm to the plausible extent to grab the floating cushion.

Though when the tips of her toes leaves the seat she was on and she’s bending too much for her own sake Harry’s standing upright, “Hey stop —-" But. It’s too late as with a high pitched squeaky shriek Y/N's rolling first and falling into the water leaving Harry frozen for a second.

Panic chokes her throat and she moves her limbs around everywhere splashing water vigorously. Mouth gasping for oxygen but all that comes is salty water filling her mouth and lungs too, maybe as she sinks deeper and deeper.

“Fuck, Y/N!!” He shouts out jumping to save her immediately knowing she doesn’t know how to swim and he’s wrapping his palm around her neck and pulling her from her waist to himself under the water as she watches him with frightened fading eyes.

He comes back to surface quickly and presses her to his chest. She too clings to him for dear life feeling herself drift into a state of unconsciousness and hard to breath while he grabs the deck and lifts her with himself to it.

He doesn’t risk a chance and lays her limp body down and clasps his hands together pushing them against where her heat beats feebly, winces when she spurts out water painfully.

“Baby...fuck.” He pats her soaked pale cheek anxiously when she still remains unresponsive to him, breathing wearily so he does what has to be done.

He grabbed her chin, squished her cheeks making her lips pucker out and wrapped his mouth around hers sucking the water out and spat it out once his mouth was full.

His eyes slip shuts and he slumps with relief when Y/N coughs out loudly into his chest and he brings her into him murmuring assurance into her wet hair.

“You’re okay darling,” His whisper wavers from the trembling of his lips and his fingers divots into her softest of skin when he hugs her tightly, “’M sorry ‘s me fault, Sweets.” He rubs the bridge of his nose to take the sniff of her scent to calm him down and she shakes her head unable to talk, hands bunched up against his tummy.

“You should rest, yeah?” His gaze soft with care and it’s baffling for Y/N that he ever had this side too. Before, she could be on her feet he slipped his strong arms under her and hoists her up and into him without any trouble.

If Y/N wouldn’t be feeling very droopy and breathless she sure would have fought with him, maybe blushed and hid her face into his neck but she’s already knocking out in his arms from the stingy feeling in her eyes that made her super duper sleepy.

..

Clouds. Y/N's merged into them and they cover every inch of Y/N, wait where am I? She feels real nice comforted around with such warm bedding and she sure knows it’s not hers. The blurry sight infront of her is enough to aware her and a perfectly calloused hand comes rubbing her shoulder when she tries to sit up.

“Not heaven, o'summat.” He chuckles airily. His smile small and a tad awkward, he’s changed into another pair of trunks that are yellow and his upper half now sadly is covered from a blue tee.

“How you feelin'?” Y/N let his question fly over her head and stutters out loudly, “Why you being s'nice to me now?” It etches a frown on his face but soon it vanishes into an expression that Y/N couldn’t pick point.

“You’ve always been such a meanie...” She murmurs glumly. White sheets tangling around her torso as she moves infront of him – their knees touching.

“I umm –-...like you, I guess?” He has never been this nervous and jumblish with words.

“You guess?” She asks and scared that he missed up he rushes out to hold her and to make her believe that his feelings are true.

“No, no! I’m sure. I like you very much.” That puts Y/N into silence where she stares the gleaming jewels onto his fingers and ponders over what he said.

Harry Styles. Her first kiss. Her very first candy love crush and her dream of bad boy actually likes her back.

She tries to ignore the party poppers going inside her body and the drums of happiness rolling around her heart.

“But ... Everyone keeps telling me you’re the bad guy,” She doesn’t meet his eyes smoothing out the crinkles of sheets and her palm halts immediately when Harry hooks his thumb under her chin and raises it gaze lovingly into her eyes with sincerity, “Just ‘cos I stole yer first kiss?”

He laughs out sweetly when she bobs her head vigorously, “C’mon we were just sixteen! I’d have made sure to tell y'to keep it safe fo’ your precious person if I knew back then.” His pupils gleaming with hope and a tinge of eagerness.

The next thing she said with a slight bubbly pout caught Harry off-guard and in awe that how to process what she said with so much liability and vulnerability.

“But you’re my precious person!!”

“Yeah, baby?” He grins with a dimple tutting in and grabs her small cold hands to pull her closer to him.

The sweet name shies Y/N away and Harry thinks she couldn’t be more endearing as he takes her soft looking puffy face in the warm embrace of his hands and bops their noses together.

“Then g’na make sure ‘m your last.” He murmurs feathering his lips to the corner of her mouth that flutters her eyelids like butterflies and she pants out for more with a sweet whine, “Shit. You’re still very candy like since I last kissed ye'.” He giggles stroking his thumb up her cheek and takes a lick of her jutted bottom lip.

“Harry....” She complains tugging his weary shirt, “Yes me baby?” He quips out with those fake surprised eyes he makes with raised brows and puppy gaze.

“Kiss me alre –—,” He's swallowing her words down with the tender smush of his lips against hers in a kiss that’s slow and comforting at first, hearing onto the noises that she creates from tasting him and it deepens into something ardent and red when Harry pulls her over his thighs and guides her arms around his neck.

Their foreheads comes touching. Their hearts in sync and beside eachother. Their tongues loving on eachother.

“Dunno if I could ever stop.” He whispers breaking the knot of spit that connects their mouths with the stroke of his thumb against her shinning lip and pecks that spot twice.

“Then don’t.” Y/N looses her brain cells and only butterflies to whoosh into her skull as she grabs his jaw never letting him go and kisses him harder and rougher this time.

She’s gonna be in oh so much love with this bad boy that’s such a softie for her and she knows that there’s no going back.

[ynisamenace]

Yo yo yo I've had this idea for a while but like bokuto with nipple piercings and like they just healed so you finally get to play with them and like he was already super sensitive before now the smallest touch makes him whine dikwowowjdbb

wow wow wow my favourite himbo with nipple piercings 🤩🤩🤩 he definitely got them done on purpose just so he could be even more sensitive to your touch akdkxhfuk

Word count: 1.1k

Warnings: sub!Bokuto, dom!reader, nipple play, biting, himbo top bokuto, masochism, use of pet names (babyboy, sweetheart, good boy), overstimulation

Bokuto was excited. Very excited. He had been planning to get them done for a while now and coming home to see your surprised face as he raised up his shirt revealing his piercings was worth the pain.

“Well?” he enquiers still smiling at your stunned face.

“It’s um wow remind me never to doubt your impulsiveness again”, you answer, but Bokuto was too busy chattering about how much they didn’t hurt, he failed to realize how dilated your pupils had become. You would definitely have fun with him once they were healed.

It was practically torture having to see your boyfriend walk around your shared apartement, nipples out and peircings just begging to be played with. There were a lot of close calls, but you decided to wait for them to fully heal even though by the eight month, Bokuto was almost begging you to finally have your fun with them. You decided to make him wait a bit longer, partly because you didn’t want to hurt him and partly because you just loved when he begged. 

Although your patience was running thin as well and you finally snapped when you came back from work and saw him lounging on the couch, torso bare and piercings glinting in the light. He turns to you with a cherish grin as he hears the front door close.

“Babyyyyy I’ve missed you,” he whined pouting as he got up to lunge at you, “how was your day? I’ll tell you about mine! Akaashi called and we were talking about thi-”

He suddenly gets cut off when you grab him by his waistband practically dragging him to your shared bedroom. Throwing him on the bed, he let out a little whimper as he finally sees the look on your face.

“You really know how to rile me up don’t you babyboy?” you question him, only receiving a blush and low whimper as a response from him. Climbing onto the bed, you settle yourself on his lap and finally squeeze one nipple between your fingers, both of you moaning at the same time from the relief. Your other hand goes to work on the other nipple as you place your head in the crook of his neck, inhaling his scent before biting into his neck making him release another moan from all the stimulation.

“F-fuck y/n plea-ase harder”, he moans and you give into his request pinching both his nippled tight between your fingers and biting harder into his neck as you feel the growing tent in his sweatpants. You knew your boyfriend was a masochist and how you’ve missed his begging for you to rough him up. You pull away, releasing his nipples from your grip and he’s about to complain until he looks up at you signaling for him to strip.

Gently placing you on the bed, he climbs off taking off his sweats hazardlessly and climbs back between your thighs, his eyes darkened with lust and a light blush covering his face. You place a hand on the nape of his neck, pulling him into a searing kiss which he reciprocates with much enthusiasm, putting all his lust and love for you into it. Finally breaking away, you look him in the eye and say

“Go ahead sweetheart”

And that’s enough for Bokuto to thrust into you, moaning at the feeling of absolute fullness and Bokuto’s face one of pure bliss as he pushes shallow thrusts into you, trying his hardest not to cum before you.

“A-ah y/n-n fuck you feel so good so uh fucking tight”, he praises you as he hooks your leg up onto his shoulder before ramming into you like there’s no tomorrow. Your brain practically turns to mush but you still remember to keep rolling his nipples between your thumb and index finger.

“S-so good for me Bo, you’re such a good boy for me making me feel so good a-ah right there.”

Thrusting more vigorously from your praise, you don’t even get a chance to speak before your first orgasm comes rushing out of you, stars in your eyes as Bokuto just keeps going, his hips stuttering as he nears his own orgasm.

“Baby I’m so close fuck you don’t know what you do to me so fucking tight shit thank you thank you thank you I’m cumming I-i I’m cummi-”

He doesn’t get to finish his sentence as his lips from an ‘o’ shape, his orgasm washing over him as you keep twisting his nipples, tears forming in his eyes as he keeps shallowly thrusting into you, overstimulating himself from the pleasure. You push yourself up onto your elbows smashing your lips onto his, tasting the tear running down the side of his face into your mouths as he keeps thrusting, making the bed squeak after every thrust, both of you too blissed out to care.

His thrusts start turning erratic and hips shaky after a few minutes of you making hickeys on his neck and pulling his piercings and you can tell his second orgasm is approaching. You can feel yours as well, biting your lip as you guide his hand to your clit, him getting the memo and drawing tight little circles on your bundle of nerves. You keep spewing praises into his ear and soon feel him shake, a load moan rips through his body as he convulses, feeling thick ropes of cum shoot into you and that along with the clit stimulation has your second orgasm washing over you as your boyfriend basically collapses on top of you, still shalowly thrusting into you the overstimulation making him sob. 

He keeps thrusting, you caged in his arms and orgasms again, his sobbing mixing with his moaning of your name as his tears drip on your face. You wipe them off your face and his as slurred and jumbled thank yous and sorrys fall from his lips. You shush him with a gentle kiss to the corner of his lips as you roll him on his side and giving him a bottle of water from the side of the bed. He accepts it graciously as he chugs it down, giving you a small smile before he shakily gets up to get a wet rag to clean both of you up.

 Finally clean, he gets back into bed pulling the covers on top both of you as he spoons you, kissing the side of your neck spewing praises into your ear before you both succumb to sleep.