#cody angst

[asktheplethaura]

Total Dram: Liberation of the Slaughtered

((Chapter Three: Reflection Reflection))

-

((Authors Note: A pen... and  I got an apple... P I N E A P P L E  P E N.))

Cody honestly had no idea how long he was sitting on the floor sulking to himself. He had thought about the face of his friend endlessly. Haunting his mind much like he would be lingering in the water he died in.

Or at least, that's what Cody believed.

Cody wasn't much of a spiritual person, but he did believe in stuff like ghosts, spirits, and 'lingering energy' or whatever it was called. Others- such as Leshawna and Gwen believed a bit more than he did. Pessimistic people like Duncan didn't. Katie and Izzy... well- he couldn't tell. He had no idea what they would be like, and didn't pay much mind at all before he chose to never communicate with them again.

He wasn't even mad at them... he just didn't want to bother taking up their time.

Cody knew what he was doing was very, very unhealthy for himself. Obsessing and never getting any sort of help and therapy for what he and the others went through. He was sure the others had- at least for a little while.

However, he could- no- he just wouldn't let go.

Not when their friends memories were so far in the past already. Already being trampled by time as the world continued to revolve without them.

The brunette man stumbled to a stand before hobbling to the bathroom and leaning against the sink for support. He frowned- and brought his hand to his face- a grimace written across his face. He took in his appearance. A 21 year old like himself- looking disheveled and tired- like a working 30-year-old with children.

All of that stress and it wasn't even for the same reasons.

He truly was pathetic.

Cody's face was a bit sunken and he had dark bags under his eyes. Rather than sporting his typical beige red and green sweater-shirt and dark blue jeans; he rather just confided beige slacks and a dark blue sweater with red stripes. He just barely let his hair get longer- cutting it if it get too long- but the cut job was always shabby and barely neat.

All of the despair soon melted into an unknown frustration.

The water was running- and he didn't even remember turning it on- but the noise of it made him more and more frustrated. Gurgling and gushing from the source with reckless abandon- as if it had no restraint in the world. Free. Flowing down into the hole that would consume it and take it back to wherever the hell it came from. If not simply dirtier than it was before.

The blue eyed man grit his teeth before slamming his palm down on the porcelain of the notably unkempt sink- and after two hits done in a blind crawling rage- the sink lurched and made a gurgling noise- causing Cody to fall forward- grabbing the side of it for support.

He never was a heavy man, but due to already knocking it loose of it's plastered stability, the only way for him to go- was down. He collapsed to the floor, the porcelain sink hitting it before he had the chance to land on the tile floor. The water started to quickly sputter from the pipe.

Water came rushing at his face- the troubled brunette coughing and gagging before scooting back and trying to free himself from the soggy mess that was quickly consuming his floor.

Eventually... he stopped and froze- feeling a familiar pain in his hand.

Looking down, Cody saw that he had ended up leaving a deep gash in his hand after desperately trying to back over the porcelain that he had broken- a familiar crimson mixing with the clear water on the floor to make a murky scarlet mess. Slowly consuming the purer water with it's ugly red stain.

Deja vu. Sort of.

Blue shirt.. red vest.. sickly red stained water overcome with the lively fluids of the now deceased. Cloudy white eyes staring up at him from the depths below.

Cody started to breathe harder before sobbing. Everything reminded him of Noah.

He mourned Noah like he had been his best friend.

Though... Cody did admit he admired the other a lot, and even developed a crush on him- he never made the move when he had a chance. Because he was still insistent of trying to 'get a girl' before the slaughters started happening. Because that's the way he thought he had to be.

Cody perhaps did feel love before, but it didn't matter now that he had confided in his solitude and and took to the silence.

He didn't bother using the valves connected to the remaining pipe in the wall to shut the water off. Cody just desperately took in more oxygen before scrambling out of the room- soggy and distressed. He stumbled and staggered- grabbing onto the door for support as his shoulder rammed into it with a heavy thud.

Just as he managed to make it out of the room, the brunette found the nearest wall, and slumped against it before sliding down and landing on his bum with a graceless plop. Struggling to breathe and bat away the tears in his eyes, he shakily brought his hands to his face and covered his baby blues- desperate to get the feeling to stop. Torturous. Torturous it was.

He held back guttural sobs, and desperate inhales- trying to control his racing heart with whatever grace he possibly could have convinced himself he had left.

Though, predictably it was to no avail.

Cody huffed and covered his face- eventually bringing his speeding heart back down a a slow pace once more.

He looked down at the light tile floor, becoming saturated with water and be couldn't bring himself to even go and turn the water off. Not yet, at least. He just needed some more time.

...

He always needed more time.

After a moment he persuaded his shaking legs to carry his heavy body, and he stumbled to the dining room- darkened and barely used. He flopped down on the chair in front of the dining room table, thinking about the first aid kit nearby. He needed to grab it for his bleeding hand.

Just as he looked down, trying to keep in mind the very reason he stumbled this way to begin with- his eyes fell down on a small glass plate that he kept at the center of the table, and his eyes landed on three small silver rings, a couple small trinkets in the shape of animals, a some other teeny tiny odds and ends.

Hesitantly, he reaches his arm out, grabbing the dark silver rings, his chest tightened.

Noah always did have weird accessory choices, but it made sense for him. Something simple. Something that was comfortable and lacked too much design.

Some people could argue that it was boring. Or plain. Though, it kind of was the point.

Touching one of the rings, Cody sighed and closed his eyes- before he just leans his head forward- closing his eyes again.

He was too to keep his eyes open, despite the dread of falling asleep again. His body didn't give him a choice.  Maybe it was because of the blood loss. Or maybe it was because of all these intense emotions that were pulling Cody in every direction except the way he wanted to go.

Throwing him around the room like a catch ball. Much like catch- the ball was dropped, and missed more times than it was caught. What would his life be if he didn't have to worry about an inconvenience around every corner. Even if it was small, or tasteless.

He didn't fight it anymore.

Falling asleep- he felt the same cold, clammy hands on him again. The feeling of drowning was more expected this time, but his heart pounding in his ears kept him from panicking. It didn't feel like he was JUST choking on water. It felt like too many sensations for him to follow all at once. Everything was drowned out as he concentrated on those same hands from his last dream.

Knowing who he would see- Cody opened his eyes- wearily and tiredly... he looked forward, seeing the suspended form of Noah in front of him again. Staring at him with those clouded empty eyes and somber expression.

Cody didn't freak out this time even if he wanted to. No.

He was too tired to scream and struggle, or cry. Instead, he stared forward at Noah, and giving into his lack of energy, he closed his eyes again. The sound of water was relaxing this time. Even if his lungs were screaming. Cold, but warm at the same time.

However, Cody didn't feel this sensation of grim relaxation for long. The cold hands traced down to Cody's hand.. and opened it. Noah seemed to be in search of those metal rings that Cody currently had on his hand. The ones that used to belong to him.

The ghost of Noah seemed to try and say SOMETHING. Anything. Though, the only thing that came through was a distorted gargle and confused- or otherwise frustrated expression.

Cody watched him tiredly, barely processing what he was seeing. Though- as soon as Noah touched the things on Cody's hand- something about such a phantom touch felt more and more.. somewhat alive.

The rings on his fingers started to feel strange. Emitting a weird feeling as Noah touched them.

Though, just as something started to happen- a loud, ruthless knock on the door started Cody back into the world of the aware once more. Pausing only briefly before continuing again. The knocking growing more and more impatient. Cody snapped up with a start and looked around. Surrounded by the darkness of his home once more.

Despite his somber mood- Cody felt a feeling that he wasn't quit used to anymore. Intrigue. He felt some sort of confusion and a fueling feeling of... he didn't know the last feeling.

Maybe it was sort of like an epiphany.

Though he didn't know what the epiphany could have possibly been. Ironic...

With a deep grunt, Cody stood and walked over his water soaked carpet toward the door and prepared to open it.

((To Be Continued))

[raphaerolo]

Get this man medical attention and a hug

[coffeeandbatboys]

Slowly, he stopped losing the brothers that he held.

[stealthetrees]

Coming soon to ao3 near you,

Fox’s batch finds out what’s wrong with him, except “what’s wrong with him” is that Fox was dropped on his head as a child and terrorizes his (unknown to him) evil wizard boss with just his personality alone until he gets electrocuted. Spoiler alert: telepathic torture does not discourage him.

[zuureleena]

NocoVember 2023 | Week 2 ♡ Angst [Island of the Slaughtered]

[tw for slight blood, iots spoilers, close ups & textless ver below cut] wait FUCK I GAVE HIM 6 FINGERS 😭😭😭

i've been envisioning this drawing for MONTHS now and i'm so glad that i turned out exactly how i wanted it to!!

and honestly, i applaud @eavee-ry sm for making this insanely cool au 😭🙏 all the drawings made me so awestruck and as a fellow artist, i'm js rlly proud of them 🥹🫶

ALSO to any1 who thinks noah looks whitewashed, understand that i had to desaturate him to make sure he blended well with the moonlight and dark atmosphere! [saying this bcs one person on tiktok said he looked whitewashed 😭 and i had to explain that this is js how ppl w/ noah's skin (like myself) js works in the moonlight]

[jpsolace]

I finally finished another drawing! And it's angst! So have some angst order 66 Cody art. And remember, if you live in denial, the clones never, ever, got hurt 🥲

[risingmoonyue]

Clone Wars AU where instead of chips, the clones are actually raised to be undercover as loyal soldiers knowing they'd betray the jedi ("traitors") on the order, and are all ready to complete their mission—

But uh. The jedi are really nice?? And kinda dumb??? And they reaaaally don't know how they survived this long when they are just so dumb and trusting and oh no they're attached.

There are many unfortunate realizations. The clones form a support group to rant about their stupid jetii because "—guys you don't understand he loses his lightsaber every two seconds and then smiles at me when I give it back and has decided since I have it so much I should know how to use it and this week he ordered chocolate for everyone what do I do—"

Bly be sitting in the corner, rocking because "Oh no she's hot"

Wolffe is sitting there holding in manly tears because Plo is a buir but he's a traitor but Plo is such a buir can he be my buir

Rex is like "listen I know Skywalker is supposed to be the one non-traitor of the bunch but like. He's crazy???? And the Commander is also crazy???? How am I supposed to keep up with them???? How much worse would they be without Kenobi????????? And I think Skywalker might actually murder us all if anyone touches the commander or Kenobi???????????"

And meanwhile Fox is all "I keep pulling this one weird jedi out of the dumpster and I can't get rid of him. How do I get rid of him, he's growing on me like mold and I hate it."

Meanwhile I cant decide if the Jedi know that somethings up with the clones and are keeping them close or if they just are genuinely like "man those guys are so great ❤️❤️❤️ I'd trust my life with them ❤️❤️❤️ if they don't tell me smth they def have a good reason ❤️❤️❤️"

[des8pudels8kern]

Cody: Are my feelings for General Kenobi real or just a side-effect of having been made for the Jedi? Best to assume it's the latter and not do anything about it.

Cody, two minutes after meeting Anakin: Kriff, I'm definitely in love with my General.

[stersartblog]

Searching

I was terrified to post this because I thought that it could somehow get better sitting in my photos, but looking back, I actually really like how this turned out!!!

[reggieslocket]

[gelu-the-babosa-multiversal]

¨You believe in being a savior? A hero? Or something much greater?¨

+ versions under the cut

[asktheplethaura]

Total Drama: Liberation of the Slaughtered

((Chapter Two: Abyssal Obsoltion))

-

((Authors Note: Sometimes... I'm alone. Sometimes I'm not. Sometimes i'm alone... i'm alone.... **Sad cat face**))

Cody had found himself consumed by the world wrapped in darkness and mystery quickly.The darkened hues and mixing sounds all being dulled out by the lifeless haze that was his troubled mindscape. Crashing memories of the past mixed with the melancholid dull haze of the present. 

Trauma and regret and lingering confusion or anger all mixed together in jumbled shades. 

Cody could hardly tell whether he was coming or going, mentally. The time he spent suspended in his mind of downpouring emotions, and deficient substance. 

It felt like falling. Falling, but sitting on a couch both at once. There was no sense of rest or ease. Not matter how much he moved or... tried not to move. Maybe that was the term for it. 

Every little movement from his fingers felt like static. The static that almost felt like you were being stabbed in the center of the affected limb- rather than the soft, tickly, sort of uncomfortable feeling. 

He couldn't tell. 

Just as he tried to block everything out again, within his darkened psyche- he somehow seemed to feel... movement. A presence. Someone that wasn't just himself, there- staring at him. 

Though, from where, he had not the slightest clue. 

It was almost like that feeling that he got whenever he looked out the window- from when they were all on that blood soaked, stupid, stupid island.

Watching... waiting... observing.. maybe. 

Though, despite the discomfort, he didn't feel one thing he remembered quite well. He never felt the malice that accompanied such feelings. Which struck him as somewhat odd, considering just how often these feelings showed up together. 

How peculiar indeed. 

He couldn't tell of this was a sort of strange lucid dream- which was something he had only heard of one time. Or if it was some sort of smaller paranoia attack threatening to consume him if he took his chances at moving or waking up. 

It was like suffocating. 

Intoxicating and the benign morbid relaxation pulled him to try and fall deeper into sleep. 

Though, before he did, he looked around one more time in his barely illuminated mind scape. The walls only lit up with ... a small light in the distance... and.. a familiar face...? 

Cody could consciously feel himself blinking... or what seemed to be the sensation of blinking. Trying his hardest to make sure that his mind wasn't playing with him. That he wasn't seeing things. 

He could see him in the distance... ! 

Noah...! 

Running. 

Cody started running to him, or at least that's what it felt like he was doing in his mind. It didn't matter how or why, or even if he could run mentally. It didn't matter if it was possible All he knew was that the figure of Noah was getting closer and closer and closer yet. 

He could nearly feel him.

Cody could see his dark brown hair and his red and blue shirt and his light cinnamon skin..!

But- the closer he got... the less he was progressing. Where running felt like running- it suddenly decelerated, no matter how fast his legs moved. Running became a canter, and a canter became a jog. Before jogging decelerated into a hopeless, progress-lacking walk. 

This sensation only pulled at his mind cruelly. Reminding him that what he wanted was so far away. No matter how close it just might have been. It it were close to him at all for achievement. 

"Godammit! Dammit... ! Let me move...!" the feeling of freefalling idly soon turned into a feeling of sinking. 

One that threatened to pull his head under crashing waves of water with the density of tar. 

He couldn't move or scream or speak. All he could do was gag at the sensation. This disgusting, awful, lonely feeling. 

Cody looked back up at the opposite-facing figure of Noah and it all became ... clear. At least in his mind. 

This wasn't Noah. Maybe.. this is what his mind was trying to do to understand what Noah had went through- before he found his body. 

Sinking in water and wanting, yearning- begging for help when there was no one there so save you. There was no one there to save Noah from his fate. 

No matter how much time passed... Cody still couldn't forgive Duncan for that. Even if he didn't hate the other man..... anymore. 

He was beyond the point of hate. 

He was too empathetic to hate someone that was just as much a victim as he was. Especially when he still didn't have it as bad as the others who would never leave the island. Families without their kids, because of some ruthless bastard that felt like drawing blood with his greedy hands. 

Cody had forgotten about seeing Noah's silhouette and almost embraced the feeling of... sinking. Falling adrift into whatever depths that his mind was trying to drag him. 

Because after being rescued, he never recovered. Nor did he try. 

Unlike the other survivors, Cody never had anyone to turn to. He never had anyone to go to for support or to pour his anguish onto.

His parents cared about him very little. The fact that they would forget his birthdya despite the fact that he remembered theirs year after year spoke volumes. 

Unanswered texts, and missed calls. All from him to tell them that he was doing okay. Even though they didn't deserve to know.

He reached out for comfort from them, and amidst meeting them the ONE time after he was brought him from that hell on Earth- he knew that nothing would change how his family felt. 

It truly was a sinking feeling. 

A saddening, lonely, awful feeling. 

His mind couldn't help but flash back to the form of Noah... who somehow was still there. 

His pale, tired teal eyes half lidded as he stopped struggling. He allowed the feeling to continue consuming him Because with this feeling of loneliness crushing him- somehow he felt less alone. 

He felt like he truly understood someone else. Even if it may or may not have been true. 

He closed his eyes and just accepted this feeling. Feeling as though his soul was being torn from the inside out. Breached with understanding, and braying with denial still. 

He didn't want to accept what this reality was. 

He wouldn't. 

Because no matter how awful he felt, or how awful some situations were with the other campers- he still cared about them. All of them. Even if they may not have really given half a shit about him when they were alive. 

Not that he would know. 

He would dwell. Because they didn't deserve to be forgotten so soon. Dismissed and regarded as nothing more than a body that didn't even get to reach their parents for a proper burial. 

Just as he felt himself fading back from the little subconscious awareness he had managed to miraculously wrangle for himself- he felt something cold, and clammy on his face. 

Without thinking- he raised his hands- in his mind. Instinctively grabbing onto this cold, clammy feeling, and hugging it close to himself. Desperate to feel something more than this isolation that he had continued into. This self-abandonment and seclusion he wouldn't escape from. 

The clammy feeling continued to hold onto his cheek, and without thinking, he opened weary, eyes, brimmed with unknown forming tears. 

There- he saw them. The cloudy white retna abandoned of pupuls and iris. Dark messy hair, and pale cinnamon skin dampened by the rot a no longer beating heart. 

There was Noah- his dead, ghostly form staring right down at him with an unreadable expression. One that radiated confusion, but also... sympathy. 

"N-..." 

Cody couldn't talk. He was alarmed. Staggering and stubling, he desperately tried to utter out the other boys name. He tried to get 3 more teeny, tiny letters out. To no avail. He tried again. 

"- - ah." 

"N-" 

More and more desperate efforts as he started to panic and struggle, his body writhing as he was overcome with the feeling of drowning. Water flooding his lungs as he tried to struggle to freedom. Sinking, plunging, and descending into even more dark, thick abyss as the ghostly form of Noah looked down at him, reaching out a hand as if he was trying to save him. 

Cody, with one more desperate, deprived heave- slammed his hand up, desperate to feel the others hand again, screaming from the top of his lungs-

"----NOOO!"

- - -

With a sudden, heavy thump Cody screams himself awake, struggling and gagging as he clawed himself out of a blanket he didn't even realize he had on his couch. 

He tumbled to the ground with a heavy thud, panting and groaning as he tried to convince himself he was truly breathing the oxygen that had not truly been witheld from him. 

His heart pumped, overruling whatever outside noise he could have heard as the thumping throbbed in his ears. 

Retaining his breath, and pulling at the hem of his shirt collar to get it away from his neck- he took several moments to process what had just happened. 

Tearing up once more... he just sighed, staring at the ground. 

". . . Noah..."

((To Be Continued))

[itzshrike]

Okay okay we already got tales of the Jedi and are getting tales of the empire but are we forgetting something? 🤨

[nymph1e]

The fucking despair permeating that episode. Crosshair deliberately ignoring the wrongness, desperately clinging to his bitterness like a child's blanket. The way he maybe thought he had companionship again, only for Cody's leaving to feed more into his abandonment complex. Trying to pretend he's not alone.

Cody tentatively feeling Crosshair out to see if he's on his side. His quiet disappointment and uncertainty when Crosshair shows he's firmly with the Empire. The way he builds companionship up with Crosshair in battle, only for it to turn cold right after. Cody trying to make it work but every time he remembers Obi-Wan, every time his beliefs are betrayed by this empire he now serves, his loneliness and utter helpless despair tries to swallow him whole.

This was the story about two clones who were completely and utterly alone, surrounded by others. One clone decides to leave the system of the empire to head into an uncertain future (will we ever see Cody again?), the other sinking himself deeper into a dark pit of his own making.

[joannasteez]

tanks of blood - table of contents

pairing: biker!roman reigns x black reader , biker!cody rhodes x black reader warning: blood and violence. drugs and alcohol. all of the aforementioned will be explicitly stated and described. explicit descriptions of sex, angst and eventual fluff. some chapters will be flashbacks, all of which will have an asterisk next to the link. others will be present time. minors please do not interact with chapters containing aforementioned explicit sexual content. authors note: ok lets try this again. second times a charm. every times a charm as long as i'm having fun! this is probably my oldest roman idea. going way back to before i even started writing for him. shout outs to @333creolelady for CONSTANTLY hearing me rant about this idea lol.

HISTORY

Bloodline Motorcycle Club was founded in the early 1970's and finds its home on the pensacola panhandle.

SOME WORDS

bloodlines are created lovingly. preserved violently. "let there be", and so they came. bursting into existence with a rage akin to the sun, and a daring persistence most similar to life itself. bloodlines are long, some short and others undying. connected through metal and chrome. through blood, bone and tissue. through the love that made them.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

(1) circa '09 * (2) accessories are meant to be worn (3) a funeral, and the second coming back (4) i’ll be your mirror * (5) the trouble was always here (6) the trouble was always here - part 2 (7) eighteen is dangerous * (8) muddy coffee

ESSENTIALS AND MISCELLANEOUS

the hierarchy

[eavee-ry]

i wish you were a girl .