#cuz he does even if he may not admit it verbally

[greasydumbfuck]

i like thinking about how all the versions of frank i know are so gentle with civilians in a certain way. its always "it was my pleasure", "youre safe im not going to hurt you" and "just stay still youre fine" while hes defusing an actual bomb. its always we cant shoot at the strip club because the workers are going to get injured and we cant have that above most else. the punisher is big and scary and kills people without a second thought but if you didnt ask to be there and are just a regular guy wrapped up in situations way beyond you he is also so gentle and its driving me insane

[tyunni]

NISHIMURA RIKI B☆YFRIEND HEADCANONS...

ㅤㅤㅤㅤenhypen masterlist | library | ni-ki bf hc part 1

a/n: man when will it be may over riki era... probably never. anyways pt 2 to my riki bf headcanons post 😭 p.s. i DID post this on a side blog a while ago to try out tags so if u saw that no u didnt lol

genre: fluff ☝️ warnings: not proofread, kissing, if you want me to add anything please let me know!

idrk how to start this off so we're just gonna get str8 into it yeah lets GO

he is so whipped for you it's actually concerning. everyone can tell he is absolutely head over heels for you. from the way his eyes sparkle when he looks at you to the way he can't shut up about you, it's just so obvious.

he adores you, honestly.

he can't help but smile when he sees you, always admiring you. doesn't matter what you're doing; be it you brushing your teeth, eating food, putting your shoes on, or sleeping. doesn't matter! he's watching you with hearts in his eyes and a grin spread across his face from ear to ear.

his heart swells whenever you hug and/or kiss him. he may not act like it, but he is so soft for you it's actually insane. he melts in your arms the second you wrap them around him. feels safe and content, closing his eyes as he buries his head in your shoulder.

physical affection is very very important to him, it makes him feel special. he enjoys it more than he likes to admit, to be honest!

he loves loves loves kisses!! you littering kisses all over his face? he's down. him littering kisses all over your face? he's down. a kiss on his cheek? absolutely! giving him a big phat smooch on the lips?? you just made him the happiest boy ever!!!!!

(more under the cut!)

if you cup his face in your hands and just enjoy the moment as you get lost in each other's eyes he will get all mushy and lovey dovey. it's moments like these that make him realize just how in love he is with you, how much he cherishes you, and how he wants to show you he appreciates you.

riki isn't really the best with words, it's a bit awkward for him to verbalize his feelings toward you... and also impossible as well, because he simply can not describe the overwhelming amount of love he has for you.

but whenever the time calls, he can list a thousand reasons as to why he fell in love with you. from your beauty to your personality, he notices things about you even you don't notice, and it never fails to make you smile (which is basically all that matters to him)

3AM dates with riki? 3AM dates with riki.

it's a must, honestly. whenever he can't sleep he almost always messages you. he doesn't like to bother you, but he can't help it! he's so bored and you're his s/o, who else would he spam at like 2 in the morning??

he's always amused when you answer him & complain about how you were about to go to sleep and how he disturbed you. but he knows you're lying by the way you're refusing to leave when he tells you he won't mind if you go to bed and that he can always just go back to scrolling through tiktok.

"oh you're sleepy? okay 👍 i'll just go back to tiktok then" "NO DONT GO IM NOT GOING TO SLEEP YET"

and when he offers to go snack hunting at a 24 hour convenience store, who are you to refuse? and even if you were to refuse... too bad he's literally at your door right now, open up y/n <3

sometimes he doesn't even message you beforehand, he just randomly shows up at your house and the next thing you know you're taking a walk while everyone else in your neighborhood is sound asleep.

tries his best to be super cliche romantic with you. says he does it only cuz he knows you want him to do it, when in reality a part of him has always wanted to recreate those overused cute scenes in romance movies.

he will never admit to it, but sometimes he purposefully sets your dates on the days he knows there will be rain. he checks the weather beforehand just to make sure it's a rainy day 😭

but why? you may ask...

so he can take off his warm jacket and drape it over your figure when he notices you shaking and shivering beside him. so he can pull out his umbrella - specifically the smallest umbrella he could find at the dorms so he has an excuse to pull your body against his side and protect you from the rain droplets that slowly fall onto the top of your head.

and most importantly, so he can walk you home, discard the umbrella once he reaches your doorstep, watch as the rain drops glide down from your head to your face. and then he leans in and gently wipes them away from your features as he smiles softly when he notices your breath hitch at the close proximity. his hands then find their way to your cheeks, thumbs wiping away more droplets as the rain gets heavier and heavier. and at this point neither of you care that your clothes are basically drenched. all that you can focus on is how he's so gently holding your face in his hands, how he's looking into your eyes with so much love and adoration, and how he is so close to you that you can admire all the pretty moles that are scattered across his face, thinking that it's impossible for him to get any closer. but when he tilts his head and somehow shortens the proximity even more you can't help but flutter your eyes shut as you feel his lips lightly graze over yours. but he doesn't kiss you. he simply smiles before completely pulling away, grabbing his umbrella and walking off.

Yeah HE'S ANNOYING 😑😑😑👎👎👎

and when u run inside your house pull out ur phone and proceed to spam him telling him he can't just do that & that if he pulls that shit on you ever again ure gonna break up w him...

yeah he just smirks 🧍‍♀️ bcuz he knows u dont mean it- OF COURSE U DON'T- he's got u wrapped around his finger, there's no way out, i fear...

but let's not pretend he's not wrapped around your finger... cuz he is.

if you suddenly call him to hang out or tell him you miss him he is basically running to your location!!

but not before pretending that he's too busy and complaining about how you're so "needy" and "obsessed" with him, but in a lighthearted manner obviously.

he would rather step on a bunch of spikey nails with his bare feet than upset you with his words. and if he feels that his words affected you in a bad way he will kiss you all over your face and reassure you that he didn't mean it like that

he's soft but just for you 🫰

well... maybe not just for you but he's definitely the most comfortable showing you his soft side 🫶 you're basically the only one he doesn't feel awkward sharing his lovey dovey mushy thoughts with

even though he's confident now, just like the first few months of your relationship, he still gets shy around you. he thinks it's embarrassing, but you think it's cute :)

for example, when he tries to call you new pet names that you two aren't usually used to.

the second the word sweetheart left his lips he immediately turned away from your figure, hid his face in his hands and cringed at himself for even contemplating calling you that. you had to practically beg him to turn around because he was refusing to look at you for a good 5 minutes 😭

"that was so bad, y/n. why did i say that?"

and then he whines about it to you so if you want him to shut up you have to hold his face and give him a quick kiss

one time you tried shutting him up by putting your hand over his mouth... but it backfired. he licked your palm 🧍‍♀️ so naturally, you used his shirt as a tissue and wiped your palm on him while complaining about how gross he was

yeah... a kiss it is.

speaking of kisses, he loves them

more specifically, he loves catching you off guard with them.

you two could be play fighting with pillows, watching a movie, bickering, cuddling, simply talking and suddenly his lips are on yours?

mostly he pulls this on you when you two are playing video games and he feels that there's a chance he might lose to you

he puts down his controller, gently grabs your chin, squishes your cheeks so your lips pout and gently puts his plush lips on yours.

inevitably, you close your eyes. biggest mistake you've ever made.

with one hand still squishing your cheeks and his lips still moving in sync with yours, he uses his other hand to pick up his controller and beats your ass in the game

when you hear the victory cheers coming from the TV you quickly open your eyes and gasp in shock at the sight of the screen.

you call him a dirty cheater, which is true...

but is it really cheating if he's kissing you?

"you cheated!! you were kissing me just to distract me, what the hell?!"

"it's not cheating if you don't get caught 😁"

"that doesn't even apply to this scena-"

boom! he kisses you again.

he's a shithead. but he's your shithead.

©tyunni please don't copy, translate or repost any of my work!

taglist: @geombyu @junityy @uygmoeb @sunghun @krewified @eternallyhyucks @pshjae @marknaeroni @feyregels @yyx2 @koishua @kac-chowsballs @echo-of-a-writer @w3bqrl @liz-riz @duolingofanaccount @goldenhypen @sungniverse @enhasimpeu @sieuneo @acciomylove @soobin-chois @anik-4 @yjwfav @ja4hyvn @ddeonubaby @deafeningballoonnacho @squiishymeow @odxrilove @iyeonjuni @nyaforniki @kittyeji @pinkyyyujin @addictedtothesummernights @love-4-keum @luveill @enhastolemyheart @kpop-kitkat @kageyama-i-want-tobiors (bold means i can’t mention you, if you want to be a part of my taglist fill this out!!)

[zootopiathingz]

Genuine question: Why do you ship Radiobelle? I've seen a lot of people doing it, and I'm curious as to what the appeal is!

The real question is, why do people ship anything? Why do we all see two or sometimes more characters interact with each other and imagine how cool it would be if they both had deep-seated romantic feelings for the other?

Answer: cuz we can!😌

Idk about the rest of you, but I don’t exactly have much control over what I ship and don’t ship😅 I just see the characters together and my brain randomly decides either “yes I want them to make out” or “nooo I don’t really see it”. (I am in no way a pro shipper though cuz no)

But as for Radiobelle specifically, there’s just something about them that my silly fangirl heart can’t resist. While I am fairly new to the HH fandom, I did watch the pilot around the time it came out and a small part of me did ship them back then. But I never really allowed myself to indulge in it and I just wasn’t that into the show anyway so I didn’t bother. Now, after actually watching the episodes and engaging in fandom content, I finally embraced the cringe to the full extent and let myself be consumed by the radio demon and his charming demon belle! :P

Now I’m aware that the majority of people don’t like Radiobelle, or even full-on hate it for multiple reasons. Sure, whatever. You don’t have to like every ship, nor does anyone expect you to! I can understand it’s not for everybody. The main thing that bugs me, though, is when people try to start arguments about why it’ll never be canon and why you shouldn’t ship it. “Charlie is with Vaggie and Alastor is aro/ace!” People ship Alastor with a multitude of other characters and nobody bats an eye,, why is it only when you see him being drawn with Charlie that you lose your shit and get offended about his sexuality being ‘erased’? (That’s a topic for a whole other post tbh). And people can ship Charlie with other people. Hell, they DO! I’ve seen numerous art of her and other characters.

Then there’s also the “Alastor thinks of her as his daughter!” See, I want everybody to actually watch episode 5 again and come back to me on this. No, he fucking does not. The only reason he was saying any of that was to get under Lucifer’s skin. That’s it. That was his whole intention. He doesn’t like Lucifer and wanted to rub it in his face that he has been a lousy father to his daughter, in comparison to all the ways he has helped her, with the hotel and whatever else.

Phew, now that I’ve gotten that out of the way! Onto why Radiobelle has stolen my heart!

I just love their dynamic and it all really started with the pilot. Alastor—this mysterious force of nature who can kill anyone and anything, is capable of unimaginable power and torture—randomly showing up on the doorstep of a hotel to help out. And literally no one else trusts him (reasonably so) but Charlie, the good-hearted soul she is, lets him in. She’s cautious, of course, but she’s giving him the chance to do some good because that’s what her dream is all about!

Now while I do wish they had some more interactions in the actual show, what we have so far is scrumptious✨ Alastor may have been giving an abundance of praise to Charlie to piss off her dad, but I don’t think he was lying. Deep down I’m sure he is enjoying the time they’ve spent together—even if he doesn’t fully realize it. Charlie defends Al’s sadistic behavior to her dad because he was doing it to defend the hotel (and bc he’s a cocky mf lol but it’s endearing to her in a way).

Oh and don’t even get me STARTED on episode 7 bro,, omfg the content!! The way he’s extra touchy with her even after they’ve made their deal. Her being nervous and stressed out but he encourages her anyway and verbally admits that he had faith in her the whole time. Him giving her his microphone—which is likely the main source of his power as shown in episode 8 (where he let her use his mic AGAIN!!!) which just shows how much he actually trusts her,, UGH it’s just 🤌🏻🤌🏻🤌🏻🤌🏻 give me more!!

Now, do I expect Radiobelle to become canon? No. Would it be fucking awesome if it did? Oh absolutely. But I know it won’t, and I don’t care! I’m having the time of my life shipping these two hell-dwelling idiots and I don’t care what anyone says about it!😋

[runnning-outof-time]

Birmingham | Tommy Shelby x Reader (Part 12)

Previous Part

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x reader

Summary: (Y/N) joins the Shelbys at their family event, where she starts to feel like she actually belongs. Things take a sharp turn afterwards, when a surprise raid leaves a new baby without its father, and (Y/N) knows who may be behind it.

Warnings: language, smoking, mentions of drinking, vague descriptions of childbirth

Word Count: 3932

A/N: I’m a bit nervous for this one cuz I’m not sure about it…I hope it’s received well. As usual, the italicized dialogue is taken from the show. Enjoy! :)

PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!

Comment/Message me if you’d like to be tagged in future parts!

"I'll allow you enough time to go home and come back here before the event starts," Tommy said to (Y/N) after he'd given the basic details of the event that was happening later that evening.

"Why is that necessary?" (Y/N) asked, her eyebrows furrowed.

"You'll need a nicer dress on," he answered her, taking that excuse to look her figure over. If she asked why he'd done that, he wouldn't admit to his secondary intentions.

She scoffed at him, the smile making its way onto her features showing that there was no actual harm in his words. "Mr. Shelby! I'm feeling quite insulted by your statement!" she playfully gasped, a hand over her heart for dramatic effect. Tommy chuckled and shook his head at her statement. "Exactly what type of an event am I attending?" she asked for more details then.

"It's a wedding."

"A wedding?" she asked, surprise now present in her voice.

"John's getting married," he answered nonchalantly, as if what he was going to say was obvious.

But it most certainly was not to (Y/N). "John's getting married?" Her eyes were wide now.

"Yeah," Tommy was still nonchalant.

"He found someone?" she asked yet another question. She couldn't recall John having a woman and wondered how much had happened over the month she'd been absent.

"I found him someone," he corrected her.

"Found? What is that supposed to mean? Does he even know this woman?" more questions escaped (Y/N)'s lips before she could slow them down.

"No," Tommy shook his head, continuing before she could jump on him - she certainly looked like she was ready to, "he needs someone to look after his kids...we need a way to settle the feud that's going on between us and the Lee's. This marriage will satisfy both. Esme's a good woman."

(Y/N) listened intently to his explanation, taking some time to let the pieces connect in her mind so that it'd, hopefully, make more sense. "Don't you think it's a little...backwards; medieval, maybe, to be marrying him off like this? You're treating him as if he's your daughter, which he most certainly is not," she pointed out.

"John will understand that this is what's best for the business," he answered her, dismissing her points without giving much thought to them.

(Y/N) pursed her lips and shook her head slightly. She had many thoughts about this major life decision that Tommy had made for his brother without even consulting him. She was sure that he had his reasons, as she's noticed by now that Tommy always does, but she couldn't help but wonder what John would think of the arrangement.

"(Y/N)?" Tommy's voice broke her out of her thoughts.

"Yeah?" she asked, focusing on him again.

"You didn't hear what I said, did you?" he asked her, the corner of his lips threatening to quirk upwards because he knew her answer already. She didn't give him a verbal one, but instead shook her head as a guilty smile formed on her face. "I'd said that you can go home now so that you'll be able to meet Pol back here...if you still want to go, that is," Tommy restated what he'd said before, then looking at her expectantly.

"No, yeah, I'll head home quickly and do that," (Y/N) nodded, grabbing the rag that she was using to clean down the bartop so that she could put it into the wash bucket.

"Grace, you'll stay here later tonight. Celebration might be in order after everything's finished," Tommy addressed the other woman, who had been wiping down the tables whilst the other two were talking.

"Ok, Tommy," Grace nodded, sending a smile in his direction before she resumed her task.

(Y/N) stuck around for a few more moments to see if there was anything else to be said to her. When silence rang out through the room, she walked out from behind the bar and made her way to the door of the tavern.

——

"Don't you think this is a little backwards, Pol?" (Y/N) asked the older woman as they walked down the streets to the section of Small Heath where the wedding was being held, "you know...Tommy choosing John's wife for him."

Polly pursed her lips as she heard (Y/N)'s statement. She thought about it for a moment before sharing her response, "John's got a lot on his plate with the children he's got running around at home, and this war between families needed to be settled," she kept her response vague, outlining the same points that Tommy had hit, "sometimes business and family intertwine," she added onto the end.

(Y/N) exhaled a slight sigh, still not really able to wrap her head around the situation in its entirety. She couldn’t help but think of the times that her family had done similar things. She really didn’t want to mix the two families, but it certainly was hard not to at the moment.

"This woman will be good for John," Polly told (Y/N). It was almost like she knew what the younger woman was thinking. "We need to make a stop first," she then announced, taking (Y/N)'s arm and leading her down another row of homes.

As they walked on, a familiar face was standing on the sidewalk just outside one of the larger buildings. A smile formed on (Y/N)'s face as she got closer and made out who this person was.

"Are you ready?" Polly asked her niece as she and (Y/N) came to a stop in front of her.

"Ready as I can be," Ada answered, with what seemed to be a faltering smile on her face.

"You look good, Ada," (Y/N) stated, smiling at the brown-haired woman.

"So do you," she returned the compliment, offering a real smile this time. "Shall we go?" she asked then, looking between the other two women. Both Polly and (Y/N) nodded their heads and the three set off to where the ceremony was being held.

—

John was already up at the altar with his bride-to-be when the three women arrived at the ceremony. Polly led them over to where Tommy was standing. She let Ada stay there before she tapped on (Y/N)'s elbow. A silent glance told (Y/N) that she should join her and let the siblings have their space, so the two moved over to the side of the aisle and watched on.

The ceremony was short and sweet, and ended with John and his new bride sharing a kiss to signify their new bond as cheers rang out from both of the families. The celebration started almost immediately after. A band began to play and an upbeat song was being sung.

"Care to share a dance with me, (Y/N)?" Arthur's voice came from over her shoulder, making her turn away from Polly to look at him. She smiled up at him before looking at his hand that was outstretched in her direction. "It won't hurt nothin'," he told her after a few moments had passed.

(Y/N) nodded and stood from her chair, glancing over her shoulder to see Tommy watching her, a cigarette perched between his lips. A part of her wished that it was Tommy who'd asked her to share a dance, but she didn't let herself get hung up on that. Instead, she rested her hand into Arthur's palm and allowed him to lead her out to the dance floor. They began dancing to the upbeat song, wide smiles on both of their faces.

Tommy's eyes stayed focused on (Y/N) as she moved about the makeshift dance floor. Polly and Zilpha were having a conversation next to him, but he was only half-listening to it, his mind focused elsewhere.

On the dance floor, (Y/N) danced with Arthur until Ada swooped in and took her as her partner. Arthur said nothing in response to this and instead just stood off to the side and watched the women dance. It was obvious that Ada had some to drink. She was laughing loudly and singing along to the song, not caring in the slightest that she was out of tune. (Y/N) was laughing along with her, truly enjoying herself for the first time in a while.

The two women danced like that for some time, and Ada's behavior only got more boisterous with each second that passed. When (Y/N) asked Ada the reason behind her desire to let herself loose like this, she quickly brought to attention the fact that she'd been cooped up in a dingy apartment away from everyone and everything, and that she was at her mind's end...she just wanted to have some fun. And fun they had.

Until Tommy came walking over to the dance floor. "Ahh look, (Y/N)!" Ada called out once she noticed that her brother was approaching, "he's coming over for a dance with you!"

(Y/N) froze in her spot and opened her mouth to speak, but was unable to because Tommy had already extended a hand to Ada and was addressing her: "Ada, come on. Have a rest, sit down," he began, speaking in a calm voice in hopes that a big spectacle wouldn't be made.

But, of course, Ada had other plans. "Come and look, Esme," she called to the woman sitting next to John as she stopped dancing and faced Tommy, "come and look at the family you've joined! Come and look at the man who runs it!"

"Ada..." (Y/N) said in a harsh whisper as she took a step closer to the brown-haired woman's side, hoping that she could goad her into stopping before things blew up any further. Ada didn't even bother to break her gaze from Tommy. She had her mind made up, and nothing was going to veer her off of her course.

"He chooses his brother's wives for them! He hunts his own sister down, like a rat, and he tries to kill his own brother-in-law!" she continued, pushing Tommy away as he tried to come closer to her, her volume and emotion rising with each word she spoke.

"Ada, that's enough," Polly said as she moved behind her, her eyes jumping between her niece and (Y/N), who was also trying to get Ada to relax.

"And now he won't even let me have a fucking dance! Not even at a fucking wedding!" she continued on. At this point, the party had come to a halt, and everyone's attention was on what was happening on the dance floor.

"Sit her down!" John chimed into the conversation, now standing behind Polly and (Y/N) with his new bride next to his side. He didn't seem to be happy that this was what his night had come to.

"Calm down, Ada," Polly continued with her attempts.

(Y/N) also joined in, finally able to put her hand on Ada's shoulder without having the other woman knock it away, "let's go and sit again, yeah? We'll take a little rest and come back to dancing again soon," she tried to get her to leave the situation.

Ada didn't say anything in response, but instead bent over and rested her hands on her knees, her breaths coming out in pants. Things got silent for a moment as Polly bent down with her. "Holy shit. Water. Right," she breathed out, her eyes wide as she stood up again.

This caused a different wave of emotion to sweep over the group that was now huddled together. "Not now, Ada," Arthur groaned, immediately knowing what his aunt was getting at, "bloody hell, you do pick your times."

Everyone started talking at once as (Y/N) and Polly managed to stand Ada upright again and spin her around so that they could leave the space. Tommy joined in behind them, placing a hand on his sister's back as they walked her over to where the family's car was parked.

"Go with Ada, (Y/N)," Tommy said from behind the group as they were approaching the car. She turned to look at him and nodded instead of verbally responding. She knew that she'd be going with her if he hadn't asked her to.

Ada had gone silent now, only letting out whimpers and groans as they walked. (Y/N) couldn't calm the adrenaline coursing through her as she walked...she never expected the night to turn out like this.

—

Polly had left the apartment, and only (Y/N) was left to watch over Ada, whose contractions had been coming at a steady pace since they'd left the wedding. Things were quiet until Esme came walking into the apartment. The three women stared at each other before Esme walked over to where the other two were sitting. Nothing could be said before Polly was calling up to them.

Her footsteps were heard rushing towards the room and there was a smile on her face when she came through the door. "Freddie'll be coming," she said, happiness evident in her words.

Ada exhaled a sigh that was a mixture of relief and happiness upon hearing these words, a tired smile forming on her face as she tried to steady her breathing. "I think...I think I need to push, Pol," she then panted out, making the three ladies come and circle around her.

"Alright, let's push," Polly said, and things took off from there.

(Y/N) tried to help the best she could, but it was obvious that she had little to no knowledge in the birthing department compared to these women. When Esme felt that the baby was facing the wrong way, (Y/N) immediately stepped into the support role, telling Ada that things would be fine and would work out in her favor. She helped hold her up as she moved to sit up on her knees, and the real pushing began. She hoped that it wouldn't last long, and hated seeing her friend in such pain.

"It's not much longer now, Ada. Alright, push," Polly talked her through the process, and soon enough, the sound of a child's cries were mixed in with Ada’s screams.

(Y/N) moved away from the other women to grab a smaller blanket so that Esme could wrap the baby up into it and get it cleaned off. "You did it," she said to Ada, who was taking deep breaths and trying to calm down from the experience she'd just gone through.

"Can you go see if the baby’s ok?" Ada asked (Y/N) in a shaky voice, and (Y/N) nodded, smiling before she stood up and moved over to where Esme was cleaning up the baby.

"How is the baby?" she asked as she got to the table.

"He's fine; healthy with no problems," Esme answered while working on wrapping the baby up with a fresh blanket.

"That's good to hear," (Y/N) replied, smiling down at the baby.

"Are you a Shelby as well?" Esme asked then, turning to look at (Y/N) once the baby had been swaddled.

"No, I'm not," (Y/N) answered, shaking her head. She was a bit taken back by the sudden question.

"Are you with one of the brothers?" Esme asked another question.

"No," (Y/N)'s answer was the same as before, though this one was said quicker than she'd have liked to.

"You seem pretty close to them," it still seemed as though things weren't making sense in Esme's mind.

"They've taken me in and made me feel safe here," (Y/N) gave her a short backstory of her history with the Shelby family. She figured that if there'd be a better time, she'd give the longer version, but now she just wanted to hand her friend her baby. Esme only nodded in response to (Y/N)'s answer, her eyes showing that she still had more questions on the matter, like (Y/N) had suspected she would.

Ada had moved over to the table after Polly was finished checking her, and took her baby into her arms after she'd sat down at one of the chairs. (Y/N) smiled as she watched Ada stare lovingly at the little bundle. Silence fell in the room then, and a calm washed over the women. No one spoke until Ada's name was being yelled from outside. Moments later, Freddie walked through the door of the apartment.

"It's a boy, Freddie," Ada announced, smiling at her husband as she turned to face him.

A wide smile appeared on Freddie's face as he moved over to sit by Ada. "It's a beautiful baby boy," he started as he reached out to touch the baby. Ada laughed softly as she leaned over at transfered the baby to his arms, "there you go. Welcome to the world, son," he said softly as he smiled down at the sleeping child.

The moment of reverie was broken by the sound of heavy knocking on the door. "Open up! Police!" could be heard from outside as the knocking continued. Everyone in the apartment froze. (Y/N) stayed in the corner as the police burst through the door and immediately went for Freddie. He tried to fight, but they overpowered him, and all that he could do was yell for Ada as they pulled him out of the apartment.

(Y/N) pulled Ada into a hug as she looked over at Polly, who was now looking like she wanted to rip someone's head off. "I need to go speak to Tommy," Polly said, looking briefly at the other women in the room before she moved to the door and exited the apartment.

The remaining women stayed frozen in their spots after Polly left, shocked and unsure of what to do next. "I...I think I need to go and make sure that Polly will be alright," (Y/N) broke the silence, and the other two women nodded their heads. She wanted to stay with Ada and Esme, but something was telling her to follow Polly to wherever she was going. So she rushed out of the apartment to catch up with Polly while the adrenaline coursed through her again...she never expected the night to turn out like this.

—

"Don't you dare look at me like that!" (Y/N) heard Polly scream from inside the Garrison as she rushed through its doors. As she entered the main bar room, she found Polly being held back by Arthur and John, and Tommy looking at her with a shock filled expression. A tense silence hung in the air as everyone waited for someone to say the next word. Polly broke it, spitting on the ground before saying "you liar," with venom dripping in her words. Tommy only blinked, probably still trying to process everything as Polly shook herself from her nephews' hold and stalked her way into the snug.

John and Arthur went to join her, shock also present on both of their faces. This left Tommy, Grace and (Y/N) standing in the main room. (Y/N) looked between the two, seeing an unreadable look on the other woman's face. Tommy's eyes found (Y/N)'s briefly before they dropped to the floor. He then turned and began walking to the back office.

(Y/N) stood still for a few moments before she also began walking to the backroom, something telling her that she should go speak with Tommy. "It's (Y/N)," she announced herself as she walked through the office's doorway.

Tommy had only made it halfway into the room before he had stopped and gripped onto his head with his hands. He was pushing his thumbs into his temples as he took deep breaths, trying to keep himself calm while also trying to figure out how this situation had come about. It was getting harder by the second to stop his mind from spiraling.

"Tommy..." she called out to him as she stepped closer to him, "what's going on?" she asked him once she was standing in front of him.

"I don't know," he breathed out, his hands still gripping at the ends of his hair, "I don't know what happened."

"With Freddie?" she hazarded a guess, her voice coming out soft so that he wouldn't think she was accusing him.

"Yes, with Freddie...with fucking everything," he answered, "I don't know what happened, but it wasn't me. I didn't send the coppers to Ada's."

"Who could it have been then?"

"I don't know...I don't know who," he answered her, his hands starting to shake against his head as his mind was still swarming with the possibilities of the scenarios that could have happened.

"Tommy..." (Y/N) trailed off when she noticed this shift, "hey, look at me," she said softly as she reached out and grabbed hold of his forearms so that she could pull his hands away from his face. He allowed her to, and she felt her heart drop the second she saw his wild, worried eyes.

"I don't know who it was, (Y/N)," he breathed again, shaking his head slightly as he exhaled shaky breaths, "but my family thinks it was me and I don't know how to change their mind."

(Y/N) nodded along as he conveyed what was going on in his mind, "hey, look at me, Tommy," she said, taking hold of his face and bringing him closer so that their foreheads were touching. Immediately she saw something change in his eyes, a bit of calmness washing over the worriedness the moment their skin touched. She stared at them for a few moments before she spoke again, "it wasn't you...I know it wasn't you." She didn't have concrete proof of this, but she believed him. She'd never seen him react like this before.

"Tom?! Tommy!" came from the hallway, breaking the silence in the room, "we found out who did it!" John was visible in the doorway seconds later.

(Y/N) and Tommy broke from each other, and Tommy was focused on his brother in a matter of seconds. "Who? Who was it?" he anxiously asked.

"It was that fucking Irish inspector, Chester Campbell. He and his coppers picked up Freddie...we got one of our men to tell us that he got an anonymous tip telling him where the apartment was," Arthur explained, walking into the room behind John.

Tommy swore to himself before he turned to look at (Y/N), who nodded her head, silently telling him to go with his brothers. He nodded back at her before the three rushed out of the office.

(Y/N) stood in the office, alone for a few moments. She needed a moment to think over everything that had happened over this short amount of time. As she pieced together the events of the night, something became evident to her. There was a voice screaming in her head, telling her that she knew exactly how this had happened. She knew of an Irishman named Chester, and of someone who could have provided that tip...and she honestly wouldn’t put it past that someone to provide that tip.

Sure, it could be a longshot, but right now she needed to talk to the woman who would have the answers. When she exited the office, she found the bar area empty, which meant that the person she wanted to talk to had left.

(Y/N) quickly left the Garrison for her apartment, hoping that she'd find the blonde-haired woman there. But after knocking a handful of times and coming up with nothing, she realized that having the conversation that night was a lost cause. So she returned to her apartment with her mind swirling from the possibilities and the adrenaline...she never expected the night to turn out like this.

Next Part

Tagged: @mgcldydrms @the-anxious-youth @cloudofdisney @look-at-the-soul @elenavampire21 @mrsalwayswrite @julkaamazing @evita-shelby @lilyrachelcassidy @notyour-valentine @shelbydelrey @december16-1991 @onlydeadcells @peakyswritings @just-a-blackhole @watercolorskyy @strayrockette @peakyduchesss @alexxavicry @captivatedbycillianmurphy @yummycastiel @dark-academia-slut @tommystargirl @stevie75 @lyarr24 @signorellisantichrist @zablife @anotherblinder @midnightmagpiemama @cillmequick @l1-l4 @chlorrox @lostgirl219 @woofgocows @bdudette @mrkdvidal1989 @stephhevring @fictional-hooman @httyd-marauders @nataliewalker93 @rangerelik @thecraziestcrayon @lora21 @cilliansangel @shaddixlife

SERIES MASTERLIST

[r0b0-writes]

My SCC Headcanons!!

Sweet

Type of dude to have a full-on debate w/ you and even tho he knows he’s wrong, he’s gonna keep arguing until you give up

Loves sci-fi (fan of Star Wars)

Enjoys a nice hot chocolate on cold days

Likes to pull pranks (especially on Cap’n)

Drinks ‘Respect Women’ Juice for breakfast

Gets mad when he's sad and sad when he’s mad

Likes to tackle K_K and Cap’n unexpectedly and start wrestling / “-and he takes down the green one! The crowd is going wild!”

Climbs the counters instead of using a stool to get something

First to get upset about something mundane / “Oh? You think you can do it better? Okay, you pour the milk then!”

Does not binge-watch tv shows, but does binge-watch movies

Could never understand the ‘yanny’ or ‘laurel’ audio thing but said the opposite of what anyone else said cuz it was funny to see their reaction

If he has a nightmare he’ll try to calm himself down then seek someone out to talk to

Night-owl

The most vocal about being protective and will start fights / “What’d you say? Wanna say it louder, huh?!”

Likes being carried around, but would never admit it

A gentleman to strangers / “Oh, ma’am! You dropped this!” , “Let me get the door for you!”

Asshole to his friends or family / “I’ll only open the door if you say ‘please, Sweet, your so cool and I could never be as cool as you are’.”

Goes off on his own a lot / “Space is cool, both personal and outer!”

Likes old retro-cartoons

Cap’n

The type of guy to blast his music in the car at a red light w/ the windows down / “you like it?! It's a cover from my band!”

Could and would never change a tire

He likes to tinker around in the shop and build tiny statues of Sweet and K_K

He started reading because he thought it would impress ladies, but now he's a secret book-nerd

Beatboxes when he's alone / “boots n cats n boots n cats-”

Always be plugging! He talks about the band to anyone who’ll listen

Genuinely a relaxed guy, doesn't like drama or violence

Will use old funny phrases to annoy Sweet / “what’re thoooose?!”

Does not like being carried. Put him down. / “I can walk by myself!”

Terrible liar / “I swear I wasn't doing anything, honest! Not me, no way, I would never, nuh uh--”

Hates being compared to the others

An excellent vocalist! Though he prefers playing drums to anything else

Listens to ABBA / “Super Trooper, lights are gonna blind me-!”

If someone asked him out on a date he’d get super bashful

Morning person, he's the first up and the first to go to sleep / “Having a good bedtime schedule is important!”

Watches action anime’s

The actual most protective, but he's not vocal about it. Talk bad about Sweet or K_K and he gets this knot in his stomach. Makes him feel mad and sick.

You may LOOK at the hat. You do not touch. / “Anybody seen my-- SWEET, get my hat off your head rn or I’ll--”

K_K (short for Cakes)!

Type of dude to dance on a table in a crowded restaurant for $1 and a cornchip

Not as wholesome/UwU as everyone thinks / “I once told this guy to fuck off and he cried?”

Daydreams. A lot. / “Hmm? Oh, sorry, what were you saying?”

Loves the Cars movies, specifically the spy one / “I have a self-insert OC and I even designed some for Sweet and Cap’n, too!”

Doesn't sit in chairs properly / “There's a ‘proper’ way?”

Very handy! Knows his way around a car

Would rather have his speakers blown then get in an argument w/ Sweet or Cap’n / “I don't like it when you guys get like this”

Separation anxiety. Does not like being alone. / “Where are you guys? You know I’m bad at Hide-n-Seek!”

Protective but in a different font. He won't get physical like Cap’n or Sweet. Nah, verbal attacks are where he comes in. / “Your comment was really ugly. Kinda like your face. And your attitude. And your- nevermind, anyways, maybe you should apologize?”

Catnaps every day and night

Loves the bass guitar and singing

Will wipe the floor with you at Guitar Hero

Writes fanfic’s in his head

Street smarts! He always reminds Sweet and Cap’n to look both ways before crossing the road / “Just because you see them doesn't mean they see you”

Would follow TONS of positive mental health accounts on social media (if that's a thing in deltarune)

Doesn't know how old he is / "Everyone says I'm the oldest, but none of us actually know! We should just pick a day..."

Randomly buys gifts for Sweet and Cap'n / "Happy 3rd Saturday of the month! Here's some stuff you didn't ask for!"

One time a Virovirokun asked him "how's the weather up there?" and he teared up / "I wanna be short so bad!"

Will always find a way to make Sweet and Cap'n smile if they're sad

[existingispetty]

Hi! Can i request a matchup with a Bsd and Assassination classroom male? Im a female , INTP, capricorn sun and aries moon, capricorn rising, Initially im very quite and serious but when we get to know each well enough i can be talkative playful and energetic. I get excited easily and ive been told that im very gullible and don't doubt anything im told (not street smart). Im very straight forward but when it comes to what im thinking and i get embarrassed easily and tsundere is something i get called a lot too .

I just have a hard time being vulnerable cuz i wanna come off as strong and reliable even tho I am prone to being careless and naive but i love being someone my friends and family can rely on and i try to be a good listener even if i suck at verbalizing things myself. I act tough but secretly want to be taken care of and be spoiled (not that ill ever admit it). Im passionate about my job and hobbies which include drawing or writing.

Likes - Food, music, walks, watching sports, people who are good listeners bc usually im the one who listens most of the time when my friends ralk so its nice be listened to as well.

Dislike- clingy people, indecisiveness, people who are moody or way too emotionally dependent , instability, gray relationships, tardiness.

Thank you 💕

Hello! Thank y oh for the ask! I apologize for the wait! I’ve been both very tired and busy lately. I hope you enjoy.

+++++++++++++++++++++++

Your matchup is…

Doppo Kunikida 

Kunikida can be a little naive when you’re a persuasive person.  Kunikida isn’t the most talkative he is much more of a listener that adds in his own comments every once and a while.  Kunikida isn’t exactly a  tsundere but he gets flustered very easily and he tries to hide it.

We’ve seen the entire agency put their trust in Kunikida because of how reliable he is.   Kunikida is very patient about not only his morals but his hobbies as well. As we all know Kunkida is a big writer. Kunikida is anything but clingy, he’s not cold he just would rather you be independent. Kunikida is only tardy when Dazai hold him back forcibly. 

Tadaomi Karasuma

Karasuma appears intimidating and has a terrible sense of humor but he’s much softer once you get to know him. Karasuma is brutally honest… he also gets flustered way too easily but he’s decent at containing it. 

Karasuma has learned to hide his emotions for his occupation so you won’t see him emotional very often. Karasuma struggles to communicate his emotions a lot. Karasuma dosent have many hobbies but there hobbies he does have he does them very often.  

Karasuma loves activity being active makes him feel productive. Karasuma isn’t the best at conversations so listening is preferred. Karasuma has never been the type to depend on others. He may seem grumpy 24/7 but he just isn’t very good at displaying how he feels. Tardiness isn’t a word is Karasumas mind. He is always on time. 

[mesozoic-system]

Bakugou Katsuki is not as bad as he seems.

Okay, fine. That's a lie. Bakugou is a loud and obnoxious asshole with little to no character development and will snap at anyone who breathes on him the wrong way.

Now that that's out of the way, let's move on to why he's like that.

You all know what PTSD is, yeah? If not, it stands for "Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder". It's something that causes panic attacks, unnecessary aggression, trust issues, nightmares, anxiety, depression, and more. People will develop it after a traumatic experience. It takes years of therapy to recover... actually, most people never recover from it.

Fun fact: Katsuki canonically has PTSD. It's confirmed, and you know what? After everything he's been through, it's not much of a surprise. He's been through one tragedy after another and never seems to get a break.

When we first met Bakugou Mitsuki (Katsuki's mother) in chapter #96, we instantly realized how aggressive she was. I mean come on! She talked smack right in front of him and his teachers- in front of All Might who she knew her son was very fond of. Katsuki may be irritable, but to have your own mother backhand you in front of your own role model is a little much.

Later on in chapter #165 during the Provisual License Exams, we get a little more information that only points towards more abuse- and this time it's not so verbal.

Most people paid no real attention nor gave it a second thought in these panels, but remember when Katsuki suggested to use violence against the kids? Of course, you'd look at it and wave it off as "normal Bakugou behavior", but what he says next took me by surprise:

That's right. He was raised that way.

Which means either Mitsuki or Masaru (or both) had struck him in some way multiple times as he was growing up, and I doubt it was Masaru.

"Spoiled" my ass. He might have a strong quirk, but people don't turn into little monsters just by being praised. It'll definely boost his confidence, but not dramatically. This could also explain his aggression toward Midoriya. He realized how helpless he was and had power over someone else for once. But that's just a theory.

Okay, let's fast forward a bit. He's finishing up his third year of Middle School and is preparing for the UA entrance exams. He's pushed away his childhood friend to follow his own dreams and tells him to jump off the roof.

Literally.

And then he walks out the door only to regret it much, much, muuuch later in the series- y'know. The "character development" I was talking about.

Next time we see him though, he gets what he deserves.

One panel he's tramping through an alley with his friends, and the next, he's being swallowed alive by the most perverted-looking slime monster I've ever laid my eyes on.

While Izuku's dreams are being crushed by his own hero, Katsuki is fighting for his life in the middle of town. He's struggling, but all he could do was look back at all the dozens of fearful eyes...

Right there. Right now. Look at him:

He's terrified. He's humiliated and afraid and hurt and despite all of the heroes that were there, none of them had even attempted to save him.

And this is where it really starts. This is where it all begins. Next thing we know, Izuku's running straight for him... The boy Katsuki's bullied almost all of his life is risking his own in order to save him.

You know the story from there; All Might trains Izuku to withhold his power, they get accepted into UA, and then comes the Sports Festival.

Katsuki's already made up his mind: he's gonna win. He's willing to give everything he has to show the country what he's made of, and this may be his only chance to make up for the mishap several months ago. And Monoma, being a professional at making things worse by opening his mouth, rubs salt in the wound.

It was pretty easy to predict Katsuki's reaction: pissed off and more than ready to prove him wrong. He does, but it cost him his "first place" during the Calvary Battle. But that's okay 'cuz it's not over yet!

Welcome to the next and last stage of the festival: The Battle Tournament, where all the kids get to beat the shit out of each other until only one remains.

Turns out, Katsuki does win. It was a foolproof plan: get Todoroki to go all out on him so he can make a final impression before the end of the day. But it was obvious that Shouto was still unsure of himself, so Katsuki did what he did best:

He had to piss him off.

But instead of getting angry and bursting into flames like he had planned, Shouto threw away the battle at the last second, and everything Katsuki had worked for with it.

No shit he's gonna be upset! He worked his ass off to get where he was, and the whole point was to leave himself a footprint! His entire life had been dedicated to that moment, and it faded away right in front of him.

Midnight put him to sleep and he woke up and threw a temper tantrum.

Now this is was UA did wrong:

Why would you do that?! They were all aware of what happened to him only a few months ago, he obviously hasn't properly recovered from it, and they restrain him in front of thousands of people. They cover his mouth and gag him, lock his hands in a tiny metal box and expect him not to go insane. Helloooo?! Wake up! He's just a kid!

Several months go by and now it's time for camp. Katsuki is tired. They all are. It's been a long day of training and training and training, and suddenly villains come out of nowhere, and nobody is prepared. And who shows up? The League of Villains, and they're after certain students...

Tokoyami escapes safely, but Katsuki isn't so lucky.

Just think about that for a second. When we see Shigaraki holding a picture of him, it's the one where UA tied him up. He knows what this child has gone through and he pities him. To be honest, I think the LoV treated him much better than anyone ever has (except maybe Kirishima). They're hesitant, but they treat him with kindness. They didn't just want him for his quirk. They saw what the heroes did to him and wanted to help him get the revenge he deserved.

But when All Might showed up (more like "burst through the wall like the Cool Aid man"), Katsuki is instantly teleported in the strangest way possible... and the most traumatizing.

He chokes out this weird slime-like substance that devours him within seconds. Thankfully it only last that long, but then again, the Sludge Incident, remember?

Yeah, bet that brings back some memories.

But what must have hurt him the most was All Might's downfall and early retirement. He said it himself:

After several chapters, he finally burst. He's been holding all the pain inside of him until it bubbled over and he couldn't take it anymore. So he went to the only person he could- the person he hated and yet trusted the most.

Maybe the Class 1A concert helped him in a way. It seemed like it brought him down and maybe even relaxed him a little. And something incredible happens. Something we haven't seen from him at all until now...

(From here, I'll try to keep it short to avoid as many manga spoilers as I can. That and I'm tired...)

He began to change; started to support Izuku... in his own twisted way, of course. As chapters went by, he started to open up little by little. He admitted what he had done to Izuku in middle school to All Might, which had brought him some peace of mind. It wasn't quite the apology we had hoped for, but I guess it'll do.

And during the war, he made the greatest sacrifice, finally unlocking his quirk's full potential. Despite being unable to move, he used his quirk to throw himself in front of Izuku without thinking, taking a blow to his stomach. To his stomach.

He was impaled.

Holy shit.

Last time someone had been impaled was Nighteye, and he died from his wounds.

But Katsuki somehow managed to survive... And woke up ready to beat Izuku's ass if he didn't wake up.

Anyway, that's all I have to say (so far). However, I'm excited for Season 5 of the anime series! Can't wait to see our new story animated! I mean, I've been watching the episodes as they come out, but still.

-Blightcon

[zedwards]

MOVIE DATES WITH STRAY KIDS

stray kids x reader

genre: fluff

word count: 1.8k

warnings: intended for male reader, but can be read as gender neutral; my first fic 👉👈 im nervous; lowercase aesthetic; does “bastard” count as a swear word..?

i hope you enjoy this little gift :)

bang chan

he likes romantic comedies

tbh being chan’s s/o would feel like a romcom of its own

since he doesn’t like crowds, your movie dates together usually wouldn’t involve actually going to the movies

instead you’d probably both opt to stay in for the night and watch a movie on the couch

under multiple blankets

in each other’s arms

hugs and cuddles

with the occasional kiss on the top of your head

it’s so soft

it’s chan :)))

he does the little claps at the end of the movie

because happy endings ^–^

y’know those awkward scenes where the main couple meets for the first time?

he likes to point out which character you were most similar to when the two of you first met

“i didn’t know you were in this movie!”

“you look so different! i could hardly recognize you!”

he’s such a dork

all your movie nights would end in one of three ways:

1.) you falling asleep in his arms

2.) him falling asleep holding you close (yeah not really, this man doesn’t sleep that much T_T)

or 3.) you both make it through the movie, and one of you says something like

“this is nice...i wish we could just stay like this”

and so you both (in theory) fall asleep right where you are

either way, chan is the best boyfriend and neither of you know what you did to deserve each other

lee know

he’d get you to go see a horror movie

even if you protest, he’d manage to convince you somehow

pokes fun at you every time you get scared

during a suspenseful part in the movie, he’d suddenly put his hands on your shoulders and shake you (lightly) out of nowhere, just to startle you

and he’d have to stifle his giggles because your reaction is just too priceless

absolutely relishes in how you never let go of his arm

like ever

seriously, his arm might as well be an extension of your body at this point

he may act like he’s annoyed

but he loves it

cuz he knows it’s because you feel safe with him

and if you hide your face in the crook of his neck

he’d get this look on his face...

something between an evil smirk and an amused grin

why? because his plan is working

plot twist: the whole reason he chose to see a horror movie with you was so that you would cling to him

surprise!! >:]

but even if you catch on, he’ll never admit it

tsundere

“did you even see any of the movie?”

you just kinda grumble in response, still latched onto his arm

“i can’t believe it... i so generously paid for your ticket, only for you to hide your face the whole ti- OW!”

you jab him in the side with your elbow give him a “love tap” :)

but it’ll take more than that to get him to stop teasing you about it

he’s a cocky bastard but you love him to death for it

seo changbin

superhero movie!!!

like something from the mcu

seeing him get so excited/invested in the movie??

wholesome

but he might get a little too excited

in other words, going to the movies with changbin is an...interactive experience

meaning that he talks at the movie

not to the movie, but at the movie

like...he talks at the characters on screen

as if they can hear him

honestly it’s kinda cute

but occasionally you have to remind him to keep his voice down

“HE TRIED TO TELL YOU NOT TO TOUCH THE STONE”

“shhhh alright calm down a bit-”

“...AND NOW YOU DEAD”

“changbin i love you but please don’t get us kicked out of the theater”

10/10 would have his arm around you throughout the movie

even if his arm goes numb, he’d refuse to let anything stop him

“changbin, you don’t have t-”

“CUDDLES.”

lowkey feels like a pillow

bc he beefy

on very rare occasions he might fall asleep during the movie

if he does end up dozing off and you catch him in the act, he’d deny it profusely

he likes to spontaneously slip his hand into yours :)

and lace your fingers together :))

you’re holding hands now :)))

his presence is just so warm and fuzzy and you make each other so happy

hwang hyunjin

THIS MAN

the funnest(?) most fun bf in existence

he’s definitely the type to try and smuggle outside food into the theater

he insists that he’s inconspicuous about it

and he tries to be

but he’s not :)

“uh... hyunjin, why are you wearing two hoodies?”

“i uh... i’m... cold?”

“so you’re sticking bags of microwaveable popcorn in between your sweatshirts...to keep warm?”

*visibly sweating* “i can explain...”

ok ok

so y’all seeing a comedy

why?

because HIS LAUGH OMG

it’s so bubbly and contagious

so naturally, you’d both be laughing up a storm at the back of the theater

and sometimes it’s because of the movie

but most of the time it’s because of the side comments the two of you keep making to each other

and it doesn’t help that he keeps making these ridiculous observations about the characters in the movie

“what’s up with that guy?”

“what about him?”

“why is he built like a refrigerator?”

about halfway through the movie, you both reach that delirious state where literally anything and everything becomes funny

even if it’s not supposed to be funny

...especially if it’s not supposed to be funny

the two of you? lowkey hyenas

long story short, you’re both asked to leave the theater not even two hours into the film :)

han jisung

action!! movie!!

finishes the popcorn within the first ten minutes of the film

that is, if he doesn’t scarf it all down during the previews

he talks through the entIRE THING

he’s always got something to say

it’s like watching the director’s commentary version of a movie

but instead of the director talking about the film-making process

it’s jisung muttering nonsense in your ear

sometimes pertaining to the movie

and other times...

“hey did i ever tell you about the time i saw a seagull eating garbage?”

...yeah, other times it’s...not

either way, you don’t mind

because you aren’t really paying much attention to the movie anyways

you’re too busy admiring your boyfriend

how could you not?

the way he’s on the edge of his seat, giving the movie his full attention...

the light from the screen flickering dimly on his face, highlighting his gentle features...

you’re the luckiest person in the world, no doubt

his eyes light up whenever something particularly cool/badass happens in the movie

but he also gets startled by the explosions every now and then

when that happens, you just look at each other for a moment

and then burst into a fit of giggles

“stoooppp!! it was loud, ok??”

you just hum in response and rest your head on his shoulder

y’know that thing he does where like...

he’s giggling, but he has something he wants to say, so he keeps trying to talk?

but his words keep getting cut off by his own laughter?

yeah... that’s what he’s doing

he’s adorable

lee felix

animated movie

a firm believer that you’re never too old to enjoy cartoons

he never lost that child-like energy/enthusiasm, which is part of what makes him such a gem

so of course, when the new disney movie came out, he knew he had to go see it with you

he would definitely load up on snacks from concessions

if you don’t stop him, he’s gonna be buying two giant things of popcorn and at least five different kinds of candy

and when he walks back to you after paying, he’d just smile brightly from behind the mountain of junk food in his hands like

“snacks :D!!!!!”

seriously though, try to keep track of how much popcorn he eats

bc he might overeat and get a stomachache :((

obviously he can take care of him self, cuz he’s an adult

but like

he loves when you look out for him

because he knows just how much you care about him

sunshine boy :((

y’all already know how much of a cuddle bug this man is

so of course that means lots of cute, affectionate gestures during the movie

skinship

holding hands

you resting your head on his shoulder

and him resting his head on top of your head

and most importantly SNUGGLES

snuggles are a must

for him, movie dates are just an excuse to be extra touchy with you

even though he never needs an excuse to get cuddles whenever he wants

because c’mon

it’s felix

what are you gonna do, say no?

kim seungmin

murder mystery film

tends not to talk all that much during movies

he’d just be so completely engrossed in the movie that he’d forget about his surroundings

but that’s not to say he won’t hold your hand or drape his arm over your shoulders

every now and then you can catch him leaning forward in his seat

with his mouth slightly ajar

it’s so endearing

but if for whatever reason you want to get his attention...

heh...

yeah, good luck with that

you’d have to maybe give his hand a lil squeeze to get his attention

and at first he’d just turn his head in your direction, keeping his eyes glued to the movie

but if you gave his hand another squeeze, he’d snap out of it

“psst...seungmin”

“mm.”

“hey, seungmin?”

“huh? yeah?”

“i love you”

if that doesn’t make his heart SWELL—

his dazed expression would quickly shift into one of pure elation and fondness

he might not respond verbally

but he’d gently bring your hand up to his lips

press a soft kiss atop your knuckles

and then lower your hand again without letting go, turning his attention back to the movie

but that bright smile of his would never falter for even a moment

he loves you too

so so much :)

yang jeongin

another one for romantic comedies

he likes it when there’s a little less “rom” and slightly more “com”

and so do you

because it means you get to hear his laugh more

oh god...

his laugh

the little giggles in between the short gasps for air...

so cute

“no. i’m not cute.”

he is very cute

probably won’t initiate any skinship

but if you do, he will absolutely go along with it

sometimes he’ll nod off in the middle of a movie

and then wake up during the credits, completely disoriented

“where am i”

“you fell asleep”

“huh??”

“you drooled a little on my shoulder, you goof”

unlike hyunjin, he’s really good at sneaking food into the theaters

like really really good

almost to the point that it’s scary

usually people try to sneak in popcorn or candy or maybe soda

well not jeongin

“hey, you want some?”

“what the- HOW DID YOU GET A BUCKET OF FRIED CHICKEN IN HERE”

“:]”

he’s not telling

like or reblog if you enjoyed ^^ feedback is always welcome and very much appreciated!

[muwur]

could i request an -oikawa-kuroo-suga- headcanons for a partner with autism/adhd? (autism and adhd in girls can be like, real hard to write if you dont have it or know someone who does so its 100% okay to say no wididnejfufhejrr) especially with like, being embarrassed about stimming in front of them or dealing with rejection sensitive dysphoria as a symptom 😗👉👈 thank yooooooooooou i owe u my liyef

haikyuu + s/o with autism/adhd headcanons

✧ hc’s ✧ for oikawa, kuroo, suga & tendou

❧ gn reader

✎ 1.3k words

a/n: i got u b! this is wut im here for, to help u feel a lil represented 😌 also ik u a special fren of mine so hehe here u go (happy birthday soon btw c; ily i hope you enjoy pls feel free to lmk if there’s smth youd like me to change ♡)! aLsO pLEASePLEAseplEASe anyone let me know if there is something I wrote in this that doesn’t sit well with you. as someone who does not have autism/adhd or has had much experience around people who do, i cannot portray it accurately. i do not intend to misrepresent anyone’s experiences. i love and care for you all; the last thing i want to do is hurt or offend anyone. thankfully anon + the internet were great sources for me to try to understand things better. tho that is not to say i can fully comprehend these conditions (cuz i never can unless i experience it myself)

n e ways, u r all loveli n i hope ur having an amazing day <3

just wanna preface that these bois would love anyone for who they are, and would do their best to support you in whatever ways possible <3

oikawa

✧ oikawa had been replying consistently to your messages before suddenly disappearing with no explanation,,,

✧ at first it seemed like nothing, but after several hours and follow up texts from yourself, you couldn’t help but think that maybe he just didn’t want to reply to you

✧ maybe he didn’t even like you anymore

✧ fear that every moment you shared together meant nothing settled in the pit of your stomach

✧ a while later you received a phone call from a very apologetic oikawa, who was explaining that he dropped his phone in the bowl of ramen he was eating and had to go to the store and wait for hours before finally getting a new one and--

✧ “a-are you crying? hey, what’s wrong? i’m sorry i was gone for so long. i’m here now.”

✧ will definitely come over immediately to give you reassuring cuddles

✧ “you mean the world to me. i never want to hurt you, and i never want to leave you, either.”

✧ makes sure to communicate very clearly with you to reassure you what he really means

✧ always reminding you how much he cares about you to reinforce in your head that he’s always going to be there for you

✧ does self-care days with you to destress because life is tough (*cue selfies with face masks and laying in bed for hours with each other’s comforting presence*)

✧ very quick to defend and protect you from people who hurt you. will ask, “excuse me, can i help you?” with a piercing glare that’ll get anyone to back down

✧ gives you constant reassurance about your stimming

✧ helps you interpret social cues and situations, gives you tips on how to handle your interactions with others and in under circumstances (as well as how to remain calm in your own mind)

✧ practices positive self-talk with you because he wants to help you see how great you are

✧ anyone who doesn’t see it is at a loss and is irrelevant, they don’t exist in oikawa’s book 💅

kuroo

✧ always educating himself so he knows how to be helpful

✧ unintentionally embarrassed you once by asking what you were doing when he caught you stimming once (which was when he found out about it)

✧ he was genuinely curious and meant no harm, and he apologized for bringing it up how he did

✧ however, he was glad he asked you so that he could be informed and reassure you that stimming is okay. he understands the importance of it and he’d prefer you have something to help you self-soothe. no judgment here, this is a safe space

✧ takes mental notes on all your favorite stims (verbal, visual, tactile, oral, proprioception, etc)

✧ even discovers new stims for you to try and buys you things to help with them (“here, this is a fidget spinner, y/n” or “you know they make CHEWABLE JEWLERY? they call it CHEWELRY. that’s genius. *typing on phone* what colors do you like, babe?” )

✧ encourages you to talk about your feelings and find additional coping strategies (“let’s try this neat breathing technique i learned about today!”)

✧ saves you from overwhelming situations (ie. pulling you out of a crowd, shutting down really noisy things, giving you space to clear your head and breathe)

✧ ruffles your hair as a sign of affection and calls you cute nicknames

✧ helps you study, make plans, and stay organized. tries to keep things interesting and interactive so you don’t lose interest/find it boring

✧ when you’re having an especially hard time focusing, he’ll pull you aside for a relaxing break like talking a small walk, watching an episode of y’alls favorite show, sharing a snack, playing a game, looking at memes or tik tok, chatting, etc

✧ makes sure to validate your feelings first and acknowledge your concerns before giving you his thoughts

✧ helps you view situations from a different perspective so you don’t assume rejection from others. when there is some form of rejection, he’s there to help you cope with the emotions 

✧ gives you a lot of hugs when you’re feeling dejected and lonely, reminding you he’ll never leave your side 

sugawara

✧ he’s quite perceptive, so when he noticed your unease, he asked you about it

✧ embarrassed but not wanting to lie, especially to suga, you admitted to being afraid of stimming around him and that you had been trying to hold back from it (even if it was hard)

✧ his eyes immediately soften as he tells you that there’s no reason to be embarrassed about it

✧ he just wants you to be yourself and feel comfortable

✧ learns about all of your stims. totally supports and normalizes them (however, if they’re ever self-injurous, he’ll do research and consult expert help to redirect the behavior)

✧ will absolutely take good care of you, he’s not sugamama for no reason

✧ a great listener! always hearing you out when you talk about your passions and interests

✧ wants you to express yourself however you can because he understands communication may not always be easy (reminder that communication and expression aren’t always verbal!)

✧ praises you and hypes you up all the time, going on about how there’s so much about you he loves

✧ has the most soothing voice ever. will whisper you sweet, reassuring words to calm and ease your mind

✧ will even just hum for you. lit rally anything. the suga juke box varies from lullabies to funky fresh songs

✧ very patient and will support you when you feel upset, frustrated, and/or have outbursts

✧ encourages you to talk about your feelings, but never pressures you. shares his own thoughts and feelings to help you open up, asks you thoughtful questions

✧ may be ultimate soft boi but gives anyone the look™ if they even just stare, and goes feral if someone’s ever rude to you in any way, calls them tf out and is #satisfied when he gets them to apologize

✧ also helps you study and be organized! good at creating schedules and encouraging you to stick with them

✧ constantly making sure you eat sufficient meals 😋 and get enough rest 😴 will nag you until you do

tendou

✧ MORE THAN HAPPY TO PROVIDE ALL THE STIMULATION YOU NEED, says it’s an opportunity to give each other mutual attention and bond

✧ but will also provide you an outlet for just relaxing and unwinding

✧ will talk to you for hours and hours about your favorite shows/movies/books

✧ BINGES THEM WITH YOU

✧ always treating you to your favorite snacks/flavors and discovering new things for you to try that will match your taste/texture preferences (only the best for u 😌)

✧ curious about how stims make you feel and asks you to describe those sensations to him  

✧ thinks it’s super cool when you can finish his sentences for him,,, cuz it’s like y’all on the same wavelength (you gellll)

✧ if anyone made you feel bad,,, o boy

✧ tendou would intimidate them to the point he would probably appear in their nightmares ffegjegk this is why you don’t fuck with this man or those who cares about 

✧ king of spontaneity and asks if you’re down to do the most random things

✧ “let’s buy a trampoline”

✧ *2 am* “you down for some fries and dip? and by dip i mean m i l k s h a k e s”

✧ of course he’ll never suggest things he knows you would be uncomfortable with. never puts you in a stressful situation and always makes sure you’re enjoying yourself

✧ invites you everywhere and makes sure you feel included. always by your side!

✧ squeezes your hand whenever he can tell you’re feeling anxious

✧ if you feel anxious about trying new things, he’s there to encourage you! recounts all the positive aspects 

✧ but if you’re really excited to try something, you bet he’ll match your excitement

✧ a very good listener. empathizes a lot with being misunderstood or seen as “different,” and is therefore a major source of comfort

✧ constantly showing you how to be yourself and that you shouldn’t feel ashamed about it, cuz that’s who he fell in love with

[iaintyourbro]

What’s your take on Cloud’s depression during AC? People on twitter are suddenly talking about this, again. This matter was brought up by those antis saying that we Clotis should accept the fact that Tifa wasn’t the one who “healed” Cloud and that she was also being mean and not considerate whatsoever. The funny thing is that, they also accused us of denying his depression and not understanding it. TF. Let’s be real, Tifa played a major part, in fact she gave him morale thx to her “scolding” lol

Hey anon.. 

Yeah, Twitter has me depressed today. I think it started last night. I was enjoying it for a bit, but the last week or two have been so bad over there with bullshit that I’m about to just take a break from the entire fandom. 

My Take on AC Cloud:

I watched AC when it first came out, and I barely remember it. I remember I didn’t like what they did. Why was Cloud so depressed and brooding? Oh Aerith is in this? Interesting. I felt like it was disjointed and removed a lot of the great progress Cloud made in OG. They kept this depressed, brooding guy in KH as well... It just didn’t seem right to me. I was young, too. 

At this point we also didn’t have On the Way to a Smile, Crisis Core, or anything else, really.. None of the Ultimanias were in English at this point. I also was not interested enough in going online. It was a weird time when I was playing other things and was meh on FF7 for a while. I was always a FF8 fangirl, so was jealous of FF7 at times hahaha. It got so much more attention and love. 

It took me a long time to watch it again. I remember my husband watching it before Remake came out and I felt mad or sad. It was like an emotion from memory, and I didn’t know why. I can’t describe it. I saw it on the TV and was like why is this on here... 

After playing Remake, I bit the bullet and ordered AC Complete, which had things tweaked and added. I also am now in my 30′s and have a lot more life experience.

Antis like to say Cloud is depressed solely because Aerith is dead and he wants to be with her. This may be one of the reasons I didn’t like AC, because when I did happen to come across some FF7 thing online, I’d see this shit and be like whatever, that makes no sense. 

I enjoyed ACC. My heart was actually pounding and I was nervous/intrigued by what was going on even though I knew the story. I haven’t read all of CoT yet, but I’ve seen the excerpts online, so I know the general gist of things.

Based strictly on ACC:

Cloud is really upset that Denzel is sick. He’s obsessively looking up medical stuff to figure out how to cure it - this is shown with everything all over his desk. He’s closed in on himself to do this. I did the same shit when my dad had cancer. I did it for three fucking years while he was alive - from the time he got diagnosed to the day he was dying. Every damn day I looked up articles, research, and theories. It’s not healthy. It’s depressing and I closed myself off from the world half the time and didn’t realize it. Thank God my husband is a patient saint. 

Cloud does care a lot about Tifa. His reaction alone at seeing her knocked out in the church is heart wrenching. When they’re brought back to Seventh Heaven, Cloud pops right up when he sees Tifa there. He then stays with her until she wakes up. This is a pretty good amount of time. The sun is up when he’s looking over her, and when she wakes up, it’s dark outside. He could have slipped out again without her noticing if he really wanted to. I’m sure he may have contemplated it. 

She calls his ass out on how he’s acting. She knows he’s sick at this point. This was huge for Tifa who’s not confrontational. He clearly doesn’t want to completely disconnect, or he would have gotten rid of his cell phone voluntarily. He doesn’t. They actually show him checking his messages. 

Ultimately Cloud leaves because he ends up with Geostigma. That’s the last straw. He can’t face the fact that he’s going to die and what it’ll do to his family, so he leaves. Listen, I think the only reason my dad didn’t try to leave when he was diagnosed was because he had nowhere to go and by time he started verbalizing wanting to leave, he was physically unable to. Yes, I remember him being angry because he was hospitalized again and he told my mom he was going to get an apartment by himself so she didn’t know when he was getting bad. It’s very hurtful to even think it, and even worse when you know they don’t actually mean it... They do it because they don’t want to see their family hurt. 

The setup he has at the church as his “living” area is super depressing. It looks like something a homeless person sets up. He legit was going to wait to die. He had a lot of knowledge about this, so he figured there was nothing he could do. 

Marlene calls Cloud out on his bullshit too. Cloud admits to her he doesn’t think he can take care of anybody. Marlene Barrret quotes him and it’s cute. I think Cloud appreciated it and I think it made him think.

In ACC, Cloud has a short conversation with Aerith. Aerith seems almost annoyed with him like “wtf is your deal, dude” kind of attitude. Zack shows up when he’s bloody and half dead fighting Sephiroth to encourage him. There are scenes with him talking at Zack’s grave and saying he couldn’t keep his promise to him. He flat out tells Aerith he wants to be forgiven. He doesn’t say I miss you, I want to be with you, none of that happens. In fact, it’s mainly her telling him HE needs to start doing some forgiving - ultimately to himself. 

When Cloud is in limbo - between living and dying - Cloud says “Mom.” Very romantic, I know. Then Zack and Aerith have a conversation very similar to a couple that’s going to adopt a child and they tell Cloud he’s too big for them. This is the “I see the light” and the person on the other side is like “nah bro go back, not your time yet.”

He wakes up, Tifa and crew is there, he smiles at Tifa... and it’s a happy ending. He sees both Zack AND Aerith at the end, and they walk off in to the light together all cute and shit.

Adding in Things from the Novels/Interviews/Thoughts:

The devs have said Cloud was happy with his family and that scared him. The happier he got, the more scared he got. We know he cherishes everything. He especially cherishes the family he has.

Cloud’s depression spiral started from the high anxiety of having a happy life and Elmyra asking him to deliver flowers to Aerith’s grave. Now, I have my feelings about this, but when I look at it logically, I don’t think Elmyra ultimately does this out of spite. I actually don’t think Elmyra thinks Cloud and Aerith were a thing - so it wasn’t that either. I think she knew Cloud was friends with her and maybe he’d want to deliver some flowers - to give him some business. 

This flower delivery reminds Cloud of what he thinks is his failure to protect somebody else. At this point he has his memories of what happened to Nibelheim, his mother, Tifa, and Zack. The Sector 7 plate drop and Aerith are the most recent “failures”. So this brings up Aerith.

Then Denzel comes along and he’s an orphan because his parents were... yeah... killed during the Sector 7 plate collapse. Double ouch. But Cloud and Tifa are going to take care of him.

Tifa herself has a lot of guilt because of the same reasons, she just deals with it very differently. Tifa tells Cloud to bring Denzel right home. She can make amends by adopting him in to her family and caring for him. Cloud thinks Aerith brought Denzel to him (Tifa corrects him). This is a Cloud thing, it’s not romantic. Cloud doesn’t know the guilt Tifa feels. He legit thinks all of this is his fault. Tifa’s guilt stems from the fact that Shinra drops the plate because Avalanche was in Sector 7 - she was in Avalanche. She feels guilty about Aerith because she thinks its her fault Aerith followed them to Don Corneo’s mansion. The thing is, Aerith doesn’t blame EITHER of them - I just wish they’d cover a Tifa/Aerith conversation about this as well... 

Cloud and Tifa do have fights in the novels from what I understand, but it’s because he’s acting weird. He feels bad hiding the fact that he’s been going to the church a lot, and I think that does turn in to a whole LTD debate. So you can take this as Tifa is jealous that he’s going to the church all the time or she’s upset that he is hiding from her. 

In the novels, Tifa has a breakdown when they go see the church after they defeat Sephiroth. This is where you get to see how badly Aerith’s death impacted her. So my thought is... Cloud thinks bringing her to the church hurts her because of her feelings, not because she’s jealous. I think Cloud is oblivious to the jealousy thing, honestly. Don’t think it’s a thought in his mind. 

I honestly don’t know the real reason why he goes to the church to hide. I think this is another point of fight with both sides. My personal take is there was nowhere else he could go and be alone. Most of the stuff had been destroyed. It was still close by, so he could still do his work and keep an eye on things/be nearby.

There is a quote that is taken to be literal, but I think it’s just a way to say it wouldn’t have mattered who Cloud was “with.” Yes, Tifa and Cloud have issues, and I believe the quote goes “Perhaps it would have gone better with Aerith, but I think her responsibility is too great. Maybe the children will help them with their issues.” This isn’t exact, but it’s the jist of what they said. The children do help them - that’s the point of the scenes with Marlene, to slap him silly with reality. 

“Oh but he sees Aerith when the building is falling.” Yes, you know why? Because he thinks that’s going to happen to Tifa. This is a “NO I’M NOT LETTING THIS HAPPEN.” moment. On top of it, I don’t think anybody would be right again if they saw this happen. If my neighbor was impaled by a large sword in their back, I’d be messed up from it. I don’t really know my neighbors. He’s not replaying this death scene in his head cuz he misses Aerith, he’s playing it in his head because it’s traumatic and he doesn't want to see this happen to Tifa. Especially Tifa. 

It’s been put in Ultimanias time and time again that Cloud’s feelings are for Tifa. I went through my Ultimania - which only covers OG - and it doesn’t say anything about Cloud’s side of the CA argument. It does say how he feels about Tifa in the Lifestream, though. 

The “He wants to die for her, see, that’s why he’s going to the church and waiting.” No, he doesn’t want to die or else he wouldn’t be so depressed. Just thinking this is fucked up on so many levels. If he really wanted to die and be with her, he’d be happy he got an incurable illness, I’d think... Cloud leaves Tifa and them because he doesn’t want to hurt him with him dying and not being able to stop it. 

The other thing that would be... weird... Zack is in the Lifestream with Aerith. They walk off together for a reason. I don’t think she’s going to just drop Zack for Cloud since the whole reason she was initially interested in Cloud was because of the similarities to Zack. He had the same sword, the same clothes, and in OG had some of the same mannerisms. I noticed the dropped the squatting in Remake - the random squatting.

The ending of ACC implies that now that Geostigma is cured and Sephiroth is (hopefully) gone for good, Cloud can be happy. I’m not saying that his smile fixes everything. I’m sure that him and Tifa had to work on things, but you can see in DoC that things seem to be much better - he’s more upbeat and happy. He’s more dorky, like he should be. 

Sorry this is long. I have a lot of feelings about all this stuff today. I’ve been seeing the fights over on Twitter about it and.. yeah. Cloud is depressed because of the fact he’s dying, his kid is dying, and he can’t seem to do anything right in his mind.

Thanks for the ask. 

[mikkomacko]

Sweet As Honey 7

~

Harry's always loved the rain. From the time he was a little boy, hair still blond and straight, and teeth too big for his face, every time it rained, Harry was sat in front of the patio door to watch the rain. He used to think he'd be at his happiest when he was sat in front of the door, watching the water splatter in the backyard.

He was so wrong.

In the parking lot of Benny's, a drive-in that has y/n's favorite cheeseburgers, with rain splattering down on the car around them, Harry decides this is what happiness feels like. Her sock covered feet are up on the dashboard (even though she knows that's one of Harry's pet peeves) and she's tucked into the jacket he lent her on their first date, half eaten burger between her fingers as she sips on the glass bottle of root beer that came with her meal.

The spring rain is chilly but Harry's warm all over and he's positive it's not because of the car heater. It's the girl sitting in the passenger seat of his car, humming Blink-182 songs with him and giggling each time they both reach to the center console for a couple fries. Harry takes a drink of his milkshake, shivering at the rush of coolness in his heated body and the song playing on her phone changes to Adam's Song.

He doesn't mean to but the song makes him fall silent, staring out the windshield at the water stained image of Benny's. It's his lack of humming, he thinks, that catches her attention.

"Do you miss them?"

Harry blinks out of his stupor, feeling completely dumb for falling into the longing for his family when he's got the perfect girl sat with him. Ever since he met y/n, it's been easier to imagine a life with her than a life without his family but he still has his moments.

He hesitates, coldness blossoming in his chest because sure he misses them but they didn't support him and he's not sure he wants to be around people that don't want him to be happy. He's tempted to act indifferent like he usually does, shrug it off like it's not a big deal but when he looks at y/n, he can't. The lights of the drive-in are bouncing off her dark eyes and highlighting her cheekbones, and she looks so small in his jacket, and her eyes are just radiating warmth.

"All the fucking time." Harry admits quietly, fingers playing with the straw in his milkshake in attempt to distract himself from the ache in his heart.

Y/n doesn't verbally answer him and curiously, he tilts his head towards her. She examines him for a quick second, lips pursed to the right and if she hadn't looked so deep in thought, he would leaned over and kissed her.

"I wish I knew what to say," she murmurs, "I mean, I can keep saying sorry but I'm sure that's annoying by now."

Harry lips quirk up at the little chuckle she lets out because it is fucking annoying. It's not her fault that his past is screwed up so she shouldn't be apologizing for it. "Don't have to say anything, Darling. S'just life."

"I want to say something though."

Harry frowns, taken aback by the heat in her tone. She's got that crease between her eyebrows, the one that shows up when she's holding back, so he stays silent, waiting for her to continue.

"I want you to be able to talk to me, like really talk about it because something like that just doesn't go away and I think talking about it will make you feel better. I want to make you feel better."

He's a bit stunned. In the five months they've been dating, he's only ever heard speak with that much conviction when they argued about her attending his fights and even then she had stuttered over her words. Now she's sat in his car in the rain admitting that she wants him to get better. No one's ever told Harry that they want to help him fix himself, at least not in the way she is. Yeah, Nick housed him and trained him and helped him through bad nights, but y/n is trying to help him inside. She sees past the success and the sleek car and the fancy apartment. She sees him and it's so fucking refreshing to feel that way.

"I want to talk to you, darling." Harry assures, shifting in his seat towards her and setting his milkshake down. He leans on the center console, urging her closer with a wave of his hands. Her feet drop off the dash, turning to him and he cups her warm cheeks in his cold hands. "If there's anyone in the world I could tell everything to it's you."

Her own hands wrap around his forearms, holding tight like she might lose him. The thought makes Harry's lip tremble. "I know it's hard for you to talk about them but how am I supposed to take care of you if I don't know?"

"M'trying baby," Harry whispers and his eyes start to sting with tears. He doesn't know if it's the reminder that he has to be vulnerable for her to love him or if it's her utter desperation to care for him that's making him teary but it doesn't even matter. "I really am trying but when it comes to talking about tha' I don't even know where to fucking start."

"Anywhere Harry, you can start wherever you feel is right."

"Nothing about tha'feels right." He admits, sniffling back a hiccup. "Every time I try I just freeze up 'cuz-"

He can't finish that sentence. He doesn't want to finish that sentence because admitting it out loud would be admitting defeat. He's done everything he possibly could over the years to feel strong and capable but at the center of all his work is the fact that he's broken. He can't talk about his family because it scares him, it makes him weak and he doesn't know how to fix it. If he can't fix it, he can ignore it. It's what he's always done.

Her hands lovingly stroke up and down his arms, encouraging him to finish his words but he doesn't want to. He doesn't want her to know that he's not as tough as she thinks he is.

"I just can't do it baby."

It must be the defeated look in his eyes or the way his shoulders slump in on himself that pulls her back. She squeezes his biceps one last time, nodding solemnly. Harry, entirely grateful, slots his lips with hers. He may not be able to say what he feels but can definitely show.

She melts into him, mouth working with his and hands rubbing over his shoulders and down his back, her blunt nails digging into his shirt. Just like before, the warmth from her is back, completely erasing the chill of the past.

Harry kisses her until he's dizzy, gasping for gulps of air against her mouth and then he pecks her swollen mouth one last time. They share gazes of understanding, y/n knowing that Harry needs time and Harry knowing that she'll be waiting for him. The two settle back into their seats, y/n bringing her jacket covered hand to her mouth and Harry's afraid she's regretting something until he sees the corners of her lips peeking out from under the denim. She's trying to hide her smile from him. When she notices him staring, she giggles into the jacket and brings her knees to her chest.

"Bloody cute, ya know tha'?" Harry mumbles, shaking his head in disbelief. Her cheeks tinge pink at his words and Harry finally notices the droopiness of her gleaming eyes.

He pulls his seatbelt over his chest, nodding towards her. "Buckle ya cute bum in, gotta get ya home safe darling."

She giggles again, doing as she was told. Once she's buckled in and reaching for her phone, Harry backs out of the drive-in and heads towards the highway. Y/n changes the music to a playlist her and Harry had made when he turned 21 and was drunk off his ass. He chuckles at the song she chose, remembering how he'd stood on top of a table at the club and loudly sang I Just Want To Make Love To You to her. He thinks she might have a video of it somewhere.

Etta James is the only sound in the car for a good while, the two of them holding hands on the console and y/n stealing drinks of his shake after holding the straw up to his mouth for him. Harry's exiting the highway when she turns to face him, gaining his attention with a low yawn of his name.

"Harry?"

"Hm?"

"You know I'll always love you right?"

His heart flips. "Course I know tha'." He chuckles but he's not entirely sure she means it. How can she? His family couldn't even love him forever.

"Like no matter what you can or can't say, I'll love you."

He thinks she might be able to read his thoughts. Or maybe they're just soulmates. "Love you forever, darling."

She leans over the console and pecks his cheek. "I'll keep fighting for you Harry. I know you don't think I will, but I'm not like them. I'm going to be with you as long as you'll have me."

He grins, unable to find words to respond to his little fighter. He's 100% positive that she'll live up to that promise, despite the nagging in his brain, because she's y/n. She's his girl.

~

For the first time in months, Harry wakes up to an empty bed with his arm slung around his wife's pillow instead of his wife. His heart throbs in his temple and every bone in his body aches now that his pain medication has worn off. But because he's just so fucking lucky, on the table by his bedside is a bottle of ibuprofen and water, a black smiley face drawn in sharpie on the bottle with a heart. Smiling dumbly, Harry swallows down two pills with a gulp of water and he notices that the curtains on the windows have been shut completely, blocking out all sunlight. His heart flutters at the thought of y/n waking up and pulling the curtains shut so he's not woken by the sunlight that would undoubtedly make his head pound even more, and then laying out medicine and water for him, smiling to herself as she draws on it. He wonders if she'd tucked the pillow under his arm to keep him comfortable just how he's seen her tuck Bunny under Arlo's arm when he's fussy.

He lays in bed, pillow squished to his chest and still grinning, until the medicine has dulled how utterly crappy his body feels and then he kicks back the blankets with his lanky legs, twisting them into a heap at the end of the bed that y/n will definitely scold him for. He pushes himself up, hands gripping the edge of the bed as he waits for the bout of dizziness to pass. Once his head has stopped swimming, he stands on stiff legs, limping out of the room and down the stairs.

He's halfway down the stairs when he realizes that the atmosphere of the house is different than it has been for the past couple months. Instead of the usual quiet, tip-toeing-around-each-other mornings that have been routine since Anne and Gemma arrived, the house feels normal.

He can hear the beginning song from The Nightmare Before Christmas coming from the TV and familiar little giggles are flowing throughout the lower floor. Harry, slightly off-put that he didn't get to pick up Arlo, wonders what time it is and what y/n could possibly be doing that has him laughing like that.

He reaches the bottom of the stairs, finding the living room empty of people but stacked high with storage boxes marked HALLOWEEN. The TV is playing that channel y/n loves that always plays Halloween and Christmas marathons.

Following the giggles, Harry goes to the kitchen where he finds y/n and Arlo. Y/n is at the stove, cooking pancakes that by the smell of it, have pumpkin in them. Arlo is sat in his bouncer that y/n has placed on the big counter, wearing a light blue onesie that has his pacifier clipped to the collar.

With her back to Harry, y/n flips a pancake dramatically loud and the smacking sound has a hearty laugh escaping Arlo's drooling mouth. As much as Harry enjoys just watching his two favorite people interact, he can't help but approach y/n, arms outstretched to grab at her waist.

Arlo catches sight of him, tiny fists wiggling excitedly and instead of giggles leaving his mouth, it's a delighted squeal of "da!" Harry's heart flips, lips stretching into a tired smile as he drapes himself over y/n, mid turn around.

"Good morning handsome." She greets, giggling when Harry smacks a sloppy kiss to her cheek.

"Handsome?" Harry gasps. "Ya just saying that 'cuz I've got a bloody big knot on ma forehead?"

"Do you really?" She asks, looking over his face with pinched eyebrows and pursed lips. Harry bites back a laugh, knowing exactly what she's doing. "I don't see anything." She shrugs even though Harry knows the tender spot on his head is clearly visible.

"You're sweet darling." He says, rotating her hips to face him. He urges her closer, big hands on her lower back pulling her to him. "Dance with me please."

She giggles and says, "You're gonna make me burn your pancakes." Contrary to her words, she drapes her arms over his shoulders and steps onto his bare feet, her socks fluffy and warm on his cold toes. Harry reaches behind her and turns off the stove.

"Taken care of."

Her eyes flicker between his, glowing with that twinkle of love he's come to know and it makes his veins heat up. "Always take care of everything, don't you?" She murmurs thoughtfully as Harry begins to rock them back and forth.

"Just take care of my family." He replies, bringing his right hand to the back of her head. "Do anything for you three."

Before he can even gauge her reaction she's pressing a tender peck to his chin. "You hear that Arlo?" She gasps, turning her head to face the baby that's curiously watching them. At the sound of his name, he babbles happily. "Daddy spilt the beans. You're gonna be a big brother!"

Even though he probably has no understanding of what y/n just said, Arlo still squeals at his mom's energy and kicks his chubby legs out. Harry chuckles breathlessly, his chest tight with the amount of love that's filling their home. It's one of those moments that has his eyes stinging and his stomach in knots because he's so unbelievably lucky to have ended up in this kitchen with his wife dancing on his feet and his two babies happily enjoying their mom.

Before Anne and Gemma showed up, everyday was like this. Everyday he woke up to his wonderfully carefree wife and his sweet little boy. Everyday it was just them in their own world and it was more enough. It's everything to him. And he wants to wake up every morning to just his family. He doesn't need- doesn't want Gemma and Anne here. He wants his home back.

~

"Harry?"

The sound of her voice, croaky and tired, is enough to calm his racing heart. He inhales, ragged and trembling, squeezing his eyes shut in relief that she answered this late at night.

"Harry are you okay?"

Focusing on the sound of her breath, Harry croaks out a greeting. "Hi,"

There's a brief pause and he can hear shuffling on the other side. She must be climbing out of bed.

"What's the matter baby?"

Harry shrugs, forgetting she can't see the action, and wipes his tear stained cheeks with the back of his hand. "Bad dream." He whispers, his throat tight. It wasn't exactly a dream. It had been a memory of the day he was kicked out by his mother but this time Nick didn't help him out. He was left alone in his car on a dark road that didn't end until he woke up.

"Do you want me to go over?"

He can't help the whimper that leaves his mouth. The softness of her sleepy voice, the quiet sounds of her already walking about her apartment to come stay with him despite his lack of response, the fact that she answered her phone for him this late at night is all so overwhelmingly sweet. He wants to feel bad for waking her and making her drive at night but he's being selfish tonight. He needs her here; he doesn't know what he'll do without her here.

"Yes please," Harry finally responds and he hears her car engine turn over. She stays on the phone with him, telling him of the dream she had as she works her way to his apartment. He knows she usually never remembers her dreams and that this story is most likely made up by her to keep Harry distracted until she gets there. Nobody likes liars but Harry finds it sweet that she'd do this for him.

"You actually got me on a jet ski! Can you believe that?"

Harry chuckles, picturing her on a jet ski with him. He could barely get her on a yacht once and the whole time she was attached to his hip. "Must a been nightmare if ya were on a jet ski."

She giggles through the ding of an elevator that Harry's sure is the one in his building. "Wasn't too bad. You drove and I just got to hold onto you, which I don't mind."

Harry pushes himself off the bed, balancing his phone between his shoulder and chin while he pulls on a pair of boxers. "Better not mind," he teases, already feeling much lighter just talking to her. "'cause you're coming over here to give me loves."

She giggles again, quietly and he thinks she's in the hallway leading to his door. She whispers, "Of course I wouldn't mind cuddling my completely stark naked boyfriend," and he knows for sure that she's almost to his door because she's careful to not wake anyone.

"M'not completely naked anymore." Harry defends, exiting his bedroom into the dark living room. He flips on one of the little table lamps as he goes.

"You invite me over and have the decency to wear clothes? Fuck you Styles."

He can't help but cackle, a bit too loud, but he doesn't care because the sound of her footsteps have stopped.

"Come open the door for me please baby?"

Harry's already on it, turning the lock on the handle and the deadbolt. He doesn't hang up the phone until he's pulled open the door and come face to face with her. The smile on his lips remains, widening just a bit when she grins at him with her eyes all sleepy and her lips puffy and her body swimming in her pajama pants and tee-shirt. She launches herself at him, somehow managing to keep her touch gentle as her arms wind around his neck. His own arms swallow her waist, burying his nose in the side of her head where her hair is still mused up and tangled.

"You alright bub?"

"M'good," Harry replies, eyes shutting as he inhales the smell of her. "m'all good now."

"Sure?"

"Positive." He says firmly. He pulls back, her hands falling to rest on his bare chest and his own moving up to cup her face. "Wanna ask ya for a favor?"

"You don't have to ask me for cuddles Harry-" Y/n teases but Harry shakes his head, remaining serious. He has to tell her while he still has the courage. "oh, go ahead."

He inhales deeply, eyes staying on hers. They watch him curiously and warmly, and it's as he's holding her that he knows he's making the best decision. It doesn't matter how small it makes him feel; this is all for her, for them. They need this.

"Think I want to talk to a doctor or somethin' about my family," He murmurs. "and I want ya to go with me."

~

Wrapped up in the quilt that Marie had gifted him and y/n for their wedding, Harry strokes his fingers up and down Arlo's tummy. Arlo kicks his feet up excitedly, giggling at Hotel Transylvania on the TV. Though he can't see them, Harry can hear Gemma and Anne on the staircase behind him, decorating the railing with spiderwebs and orange tinsel. The thud of the freezer shutting in the kitchen reaches his ears and he tilts his head up to catch sight of y/n as she's walking by.

She comes around the couch, offering him a tiny smile. "I made sure it's not too cold." She says, shaking the bag of peas that she's wrapped in a dish towel. They rattle in her palm and the sound has Arlo babbling curiously.

"Sorry bug but these-" Harry takes the peas from y/n. "are for daddy." He's presses them to the knot on his head, hissing at the pain before coming accustomed to the pressure.

Arlo swings his little hand up, chubby fingers reaching for the ice pack but he's much to small to reach over Harry. Instead, his hand smacks into Harry's mouth.

"Watch it Arlo," y/n scolds, tugging his hand back down to his side. Harry frowns at the sting on his bottom lip, tongue licking over the offended area. "gonna give daddy another cut."

Harry taps his fingers in Arlo's tummy, hoping to make him giggle but all he gets in return is a cry of frustration in his ear. Arlo squirms under Harry's palm, trying with all his might to flip around so he can steal Harry's ice pack. He flings his hands back, catching Harry in the face again.

"Hey," Harry whines, flinching away from Arlo's swinging fists. Arlo continues to wail his distress.

"Give me that." Y/n sighs, reaching for the bag by Harry's head. Harry let's her take it, catching Arlo's wrists in his newly freed hand. Arlo screeches, tugging away from Harry and glaring at y/n with a furrow between his eyebrows.

Y/n walks off, taking the peas with her and Arlo immediately breaks into cries. Harry lifts him and flips him around to face him, standing the little one on his stomach. "None of this crying," Harry shushes, bouncing Arlo to calm him. "asked for it when ya were being mean. Now give mumma a second, alright?"

Arlo squirms away from Harry, furious at him and y/n but as soon as Harry releases Arlo's hands, the wailing boy is reaching for Harry's neck. Harry brings him up to his chest, laying Arlo down so he can cry into his dad's neck. Harry pats Arlo's back gently, endeared that even when Arlo's mad at him, he wants Harry to hold him.

Seconds later, y/n returns with Harry's ice pack in one hand and a tiny little bag in the other. Harry turns Arlo back over and cradles him in the crook of his arm.

"One for daddy," y/n hands the big pack to Harry and he holds it against his head. "and one for Arlo." She hands the small one to Arlo's grabbing hands and the crying immediately ceases.

Giggling wetly, Arlo shakes the bag like a rattle. Y/n swipes her fingers over Arlo's cheeks, leaning down to peck his red cheek lovingly. Harry grins innocently, tilting his head towards his wife. She rolls her eyes but plants a kiss on his cheek too, ruffling his hair a bit too.

"Now be nice to daddy." Y/n warns Arlo, shaking her pointer finger at him. He giggles, shaking his bag of peas at her as if telling her that he's got the whole world in his hands.

"I know bug," y/n coos. "just like daddy." Arlo beams, bringing his own pack up to his forehead and giggling proudly. He may not have the world in his hands but he's definitely got y/n and Harry in them.

~

Looking at his pale face and trembling hands, y/n thinks he might be sick. He had kept his cool all week, just nodding quietly when she would remind him of his appointment and last night when she'd made sure to spoil him with cuddles all night long, he hadn't at all hinted that he might be this terrified. Even this morning he was pretty normal, a little quieter than usual, but y/n didn't think much of it.

Now, sitting on the couch in Dr. Wells office, y/n can see that today is making Harry a lot more shaken up then she's ever seen him. His right leg bounces rapidly, and he's chewing at the inside of his quivering thumb. His left hand, that's holding tightly to y/n's right hand, is clammy in hers but she doesn't mind.

"Why's he taking so long?"

Harry's voice is gruff and strained, booming in the otherwise silent room. He turns to look at her, green eyes so wide and innocent she can't help but coo at him. He reminds her off a child going to the dentist for the first time, and she wishes she could answer his question but she's just as lost as him.

"I don't know bub," y/n says, squeezing his hand. "but I'm sure it's not a big deal." She brings the back of his hand up to her lips, pecking it sweetly and then petting at his knuckles once she's returned their clasped hands to her lap.

Harry let's out a heavy sigh, almost like he's trying to calm himself. He takes a deep breath, a small choking noise squeaking out when the door to the office opens. Dr. Wells steps in, immediately smiling at the pair of them as he closes the door behind him.

"Good morning," He greets in a chipper voice. Knowing Harry won't answer, y/n smiles politely and murmurs a "good morning" of her own.

"I'm Dr. Wells and I'm assuming you-" He points a thick finger at Harry as he sits in the padded chair across from them. "are Harry, yes?" He crosses one leg over the other and folds his hands in his lap.

Harry nods, squirming closer to y/n so his hip is pressed tightly against hers. She reassuringly squeezes his hand again. Dr. Wells smile twitches up encouragingly at Harry.

"Excellent. And who's this wonderful woman you've brought with you?"

Though she's 100% capable of answering herself, she remains quiet. Dr. Wells is trying to get Harry speaking and right now all he has to work with is the way Harry's attached himself to her.

"S'my girl y/n," Harry huffs, eyebrows pinching together. "and she can speak, for your information-"

"Harry, it's ok." Y/n interrupts quietly, patting the back of his hand.

"That's alright y/n," Dr. Wells jumps in, nodding at Harry. "Believe me Harry, I'm not the kind of man that thinks woman are meant to be seen and not heard."

Harry eyes him with indignance but offers no argument. Dr. Wells' grin widens appreciatively.

"My grandfather was that way. He often tried to treat my mother like she was nothing more than a housemaid to my father and I. My father refused to accept this, often refusing to let him eat the food my mother made or sleep in the sheets she washed. I learned from him that women are truly the heart of humanity. Any respectable person knows this."

Apprehensively, Harry nods just once. Dr. Wells warm eyes twinkle at Harry with a kind of respect. She doesn't know what he's picked out of Harry's behavior but whatever it is, impresses him.

"Who taught you the importance of women, Harry?"

Harry shrugs, clearing his throat a couple times before answering. "My dad."

"Your father?"

"Yes," Harry breathes and he nibbles on his thumb again. "he worshiped the ground my mum walked on. Treated her like she was what made his world spin."

It's odd for y/n to sit there, Harry practically perched in her lap, and just listen. Harry always makes sure to include her in conversation but this is not the time for her to speak.

"You're father seems like a great man," Dr. Wells compliments. "could you tell me more about him?"

She had heard it about Desmond Styles. Only a little bit because Harry didn't enjoy the topic of his father, but she knew that he was Harry absolute hero and that he passed away when Harry was just 13. She never pushed to ask what happened to him or how Harry coped with it. It's obvious from his reluctance to bring up his family that they never healed from the death of Des.

Both her and Dr. Wells listened attentively as Harry recalled his memories of his late father. Eyes downcast, he told them of how happy of a man he was. Des was always the life of the party at every gathering. He loved his family with all his heart, always making sure to tell Harry and Gemma every day that he loved them. And as stated before, he did all he could to give Anne the world. But the chink in his armour was his addiction to alcohol. Harry claims that he can't remember one day he didn't see his dad drink at least a bottle.

Harry curled in upon himself the more he spoke of Des. His shoulders hunched forward, pressing himself further into y/n and clutching her hand between both of his. She slings her free arm around him, soothing rubbing his tense back.

"What happened to your father Harry?"

Y/n freezes, waiting for Harry to respond. She has a pretty good feeling she could now guess the cause of Des' death.

"He got sick," Harry croaks and the crack in his voice is felt in y/n's chest. "got cirrhosis. Was just a matter of time I guess, when you take into account how often he drank."

It's like seeing Harry in a whole new light. Her brain had told her that Harry's father had died a quick painless death. One that was just a random tragedy, a strike of unfairness on the universe's part. But she was wrong. Harry had to see his father, his hero, crumble at the hands of an incurable illness. He had suffered far longer than y/n had thought he had. His inexplicable need to care and nurture her has come from a long line of rejection and loss, that started with Desmond Styles falling ill to a disease that required constant assistance. And judging from Harry's brief stories of his mother and sister, he'd probably been the only one to care for his father.

"You don't have to say anymore today, Harry." Dr. Wells says, voice softer than it had been before. "I'm glad you were able to open up so much, being the first day and all."

Harry nods sullenly.

"Y/n would you like to say anything?"

She's surprised that Dr. Wells wants her to speak. She thought this was about getting Harry taking. Even so, she's not missing anything opportunity to shower Harry with love.

"I'm so proud of you, Harry." At the sound of his name, he looks up at her with helpless eyes. "I know you think you're doing this for me, that you're telling yourself you have to do it for me but that's not true at all. You're doing this because you're brave, and strong, and kind. You want to get better Harry, and while I might be your drive right now, one day you'll see that this is about you."

Tears have sprung up in his eyes, his bottom lip trembling. Y/n cups his jaw, tenderly rubbing her thumb over his cheekbone. "You can be selfish sometimes Harry. I'm not going anywhere, I love you wounds and all."

Her words push the first line of tears out of his eyes, dripping down his cheeks. He inhales shakily, a small sob leaving his lips. "I love you more than anything," he whimpers, squeezing her hand impossibly tight. "I've never had anyone love me the way you do, to where they want to help me. And I know I'm not easy, all of this is so fucking complicated, but you've stuck by me. I can't even tell you how bloody grateful I am."

Before she can respond, he's practically pouncing at her, trembling arms wrapping her up tightly. His face finds the crook of her neck, cries being released into her shirt. She doesn't hesitate to hold him, burying her fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck and soothingly stroking his scalp. She doesn't know how long she sits there with him, kissing his temple and telling him that everything is going to be just fine. By the time Harry peels himself off of her, Dr. Wells has left the room and left a small note on the table.

Take all the time you need, there's nothing more healing than the presence of real love. See you both soon -T. Wells

~

Eyes droopy and tired, Harry watches y/n swap out the candles in the living room for fall scented ones. Arlo, who had whined and scrambled around until Harry removed his onesie just ten minutes ago, has now dozed off on Harry's chest. He's starting to ache again but he's far too comfortable to get up and he's on the verge of falling asleep anyway. Despite the exhaustion tugging at his body, he quietly calls for y/n.

Finishing up the wrapping on flower patterned candle she's preparing for storage, she nods for him to continue. He juts out his lip, wishing she would just walk over and cuddle with him like he wants, without making him ask.

"Lay with me darling?"

A tiny smile pulls at the left side of her mouth and she sets the wrapped up in candle in the plastic box on the floor. She walks towards the couch, smiling growing when Harry stretches out his free hand towards her.

Like always, they fit together easily, curled around each other on the couch. The metallic clang of pans banging together flows from the kitchen and Harry finches, gently patting Arlo's back to make sure he didn't wake up.

Y/n laying her head on Harry's shoulder and affectionately rubbing his stomach, waits patiently for whatever Harry wants to say.

"S'it bad that I'm over them?" Harry murmurs, not wanting Gemma and Anne to hear him from the kitchen.

"What do you mean by 'over them'?"

"Don't want them here. Don't need them hear. I want everything to go back to when it was just us. Want to dance in the kitchen with you every morning and love on Arlo without them ogling me. S'like they doubt that I can be a dad."

"You are a dad Harry," y/n lifts her head to meet his gaze. "you're the best dad in the world to not only Arlo but the baby too. Whatever second guessing is going on in that big head of yours is bullshit."

She tips her head down, lips kissing his jaw sweetly. All of a sudden the weight of Arlo sleeping on his chest increases and it feels as if y/n has pressed herself tighter against him, and he knows she's right. He's a fucking awesome dad. He's done everything in his power, he's worked his ass off to make sure his babies would have a good home and family. And while that wasn't what he was intending to talk about, he's happy he let the confession leave his mouth. He really needed to hear that.

"It is bullshit," Harry nods. "all of this situation is bullshit. I just want to get it out of the way so our lives can go back to normal."

"It sucks right now," y/n whispers and she presses another kiss to the side of his face. "but we have to keep trying Harry. When we have this baby in June, who do you want to see in the waiting room?"

Harry shrugs even though he knows who he wants to see there. He wants Gemma and Anne there. He can't even begin to explain how much it would hurt if he had his second child and they weren't there again.

"It's going to get better Harry." Y/n promises, able to read him despite him not saying what he was thinking. "The three of you are just so tense around each other right now that nobody wants to speak up."

"It should be them." Harry huffs. "They're the ones that came begging for forgiveness."

"It should be them," she agrees. "but when they come, you need to not be so defensive. You know I'd never let them hurt you."

Her words strike something in his head. He's been afraid of having them around for a reason. He thought they'd hurt y/n and Arlo like they hurt him. But this whole time, he's been afraid that they'll just hurt him again.

[thetomorrowshow]

Faith In ‘Okay’

This was my Secret Santa gift for @sandersarefamily ! I had a lot of fun creating for you--sorry it turned out angstier than I intended. I hope you enjoyed it! 

Summary: Logan Sanders is blind, and does not need a service dog. His brother, Roman, convinces him to at least try it--and who knows? maybe Logan will find everything he ever needed.

Rating: G

Word count: 4351

Pairings: Logicality, Prinxiety

Tw: Blind character, anxiety attack, kissing, mention of Remus, mention of Deceit

-

Logan didn't need help.

He never had. Yes, being blind was a . . . limitation. Sometimes he saw it as a disability. Sometimes he sat in a stupor, trying to remember what stars looked like before the accident. Sometimes he bit back tears in the middle of a conversation, not willing to break down in front of people just because they discussed how best to assist him. Sometimes he yelled at his brother for not leaving him alone.

But Logan was also fine. So when his brother, Roman, suggested a guide dog, he was more than a little irritated.

“You keep talking about wanting to be independent!” Roman argued. “Maybe, if you had a guide dog, I could move out!”

That was the argument that kept coming back. That was what Roman wanted. He was tired of always having to help his disabled— limited— brother, and it was showing. Logan knew Roman wanted to attend a school out of state. He knew that Roman desperately wanted to act, to try out for shows, but never had time.

That was probably why Logan agreed to look into the idea.

It took two weeks for the online application to be approved, then another two to get the phone consultation done. The additional forms to complete hadn't taken too long, but it was another three weeks before anyone could come to complete the home evaluation—see if Logan was physically able to have a guide dog, see if his home was safe for one, etc. It all happened, though, and soon they received the approval notification letting them know they had found two dogs that might match with Logan and that they were ready for him to come stay at campus for the two weeks it took to go over the training course.

The day came to leave. Logan was still unsure about this, but Roman insisted it was too late to back out now—then they would've wasted not just their own time, but countless people's time. So Logan begrudgingly followed Roman to the car. He knew the way down the driveway, but Roman had been struck by some protective urge and not only taken his suitcase from him, but had insisted on making him use his white cane. Ridiculous.

Logan settled in to the familiar worn leather of the passenger seat and felt the warmth of the morning sun on his face. It was pleasant. He could almost pretend that they were going to visit friends, or going out to eat.

Then he felt an arm reaching over his chest, and he slapped Roman away. “I can buckle my own seatbelt,” Logan snapped, but didn't move to pull it around his waist.

“Well, you weren't doing it.”

Grumbling, Logan buckled the seatbelt. On the drive he tried to ignore Roman's incessant noise, show tunes and Disney songs alike blaring from the radio. If his brother didn't insist on singing along, it wouldn't be so bad.

Instead, he tried to clear his mind. Long division generally did the trick, but it wouldn't on this day. He tried some basic trigonometry, but just couldn't focus.

His head kept circling back to the dog. What would it sound like? How big would it be? Would it truly allow him to live alone? He lived within walking distance of both the university he attended and the grocery store, and could technically get to both places without physical help—a GPS speaking into his ear didn't count—but rarely did. His school, CSU, helped him immensely with classes and getting to different areas of the campus. Roman drove him to school every morning and to and from the grocery store.

Deep within, he knew that Roman would never move out. Logan was notoriously bad with money—why did all the bills have to feel the same? Folding them differently could only do so much—and, with how often the store was rearranged, he could never reliably find what he was looking for. The few times he had gone by himself, he'd ended up having to ask for help to identify which can was cream of mushroom soup, which milk was 2%, which carton of strawberries looked the best, if what he was holding was hot pockets or a microwave dinner—and all with a clerk guiding him the sections.

A seeing eye dog couldn't help with those things. Only Roman knew what he—they—needed.

-

“It's good to meet you! Glad you're able to stay with us for the next few weeks. Would I be correct in assuming that you're Logan?”

Logan shook the stranger's hand. “That is my name,” he confirmed.

“I'm Patton Hoyt, and I'll be introducing you to the two dogs we've matched with you! Would you like me to guide you by your arm, or just speak directions?”

Logan's eyebrows rose. That was a first. Generally people did one or the other (usually the first) without asking his preference. Of course, Patton was likely trained to ask. “Spoken directions, please,” he replied.”

Roman still guided him with a hand on his back.

-

“This is Layla, she's a lab retriever. . . .”

-

Layla was fine, Logan supposed. She seemed to know her stuff. She just . . . didn't seem to like Roman. That would be a problem, seeing as how Roman wasn't going to be moving out anytime soon.

“Do you want to meet the other dog? If Layla doesn't feel right, I can be back in fifteen minutes with Crofters.”

“Like the jam?” Logan asked, smiling despite himself. “I had some on toast this morning.”

Patton giggled, somehow small and loud at the same time. “Probably,” he said, a grin in his voice. “Would you like to meet him?”

“Why not?” Logan found himself responding. He didn't really want a service dog, he reminded himself. It would be just perfect for Layla to not work out, so they could go home and forget about this whole thing. Roman was the one who wanted the dog.

He was only agreeing, he realized, because he was afraid of hurting Patton Hoyt's feelings. Logan had never really had much regard for others' feelings, but he liked this Patton. He was kind and considerate and funny. His voice held a bright quality, a constant warmth. Logan didn't want to let Patton down.

Not that Patton would be let down. It was his job to be kind. At the end of the day, he would still get paid. Somehow, though, he got Logan to agree to meeting this dog.

-

Logan knew immediately that Crofters was the one. Instead of licking his hand, or barking at Roman, or ignoring them both completely, Crofters bumped his head gently against Logan's right knee then backed up a step.

“Aww! He nuzzled his noggin! Crofters is usually a bit shy!”

Logan grinned. He still didn't really want a service dog, but he thought maybe he could like this dog. Patton told him about how excited Crofters was, how well he'd done on all his tests, and how much Crofters had enjoyed a sweet potato that had been left out from an employee's lunch. Patton talked a lot, and didn't seem to mind when Logan interrupted to provide random bits of knowledge, or review some of his basic needs in his routine.

Logan was growing . . . attached, he supposed. He begrudgingly admitted that he had been looking forward to the idea of having a dog. Now, he didn't know if he was attached to Patton, or to the idea of having a dog. He supposed he'd find out.

-

Now he knew. He began to know when Patton timidly asked if Crofters was right, and if he wasn't, they could go through the application process again and ask for a different dog. Logan cut Patton off and agreed to begin working with Crofters, because yes, he would love to adopt the golden retriever, and yes, he would be willing to stay on campus for the duration of the two weeks of training. Now, as he patted Crofters's head while Patton explained (even though he'd said the same thing every day for the past week at training) the schedule for the day, he knew.

Logan was certainly very open to the idea of having a seeing eye dog.

He was also experiencing a crush on Patton Hoyt.

-

“I'm just rambling now, aren't I?”

Logan smiled. “Possibly,” he allowed. “However, your rambling is . . . pleasing to listen to.”

Patton laughed. It was almost drowned out by the noise of the buffet.

Six weeks had passed since training ended. Patton had scheduled one meeting (ahem, date, ahem) a week, so they could go over any problems Logan might be experiencing or any questions he had. At least, that was the purpose of the meetings.

“Do you want anything else to eat?”

“No, no,” Logan waved him off. “Whatever the fried item you got me was may be a cause for gastrointestinal surgery.”

Patton giggled again. “It was okra,” he said. “Is Roman picking you up, or do you and Crofters want me to drop you off somewhere?”

“Patton, I believe we should stop, to use a figurative statement, beating around the bush.”

Silence from Patton. Logan heard a rustle and caught a whiff of perfume as someone passed by. A child screeched over the beastly rumble of chatter. Logan took a deep breath. This was going to be hard to bring up, so he worded it in the most detached way possible.

“I have developed feelings of romantic attraction for you.” Wow, that was blunt. Not for the first time in that day alone, Logan wished he could see. Patton's silence didn't tell him if he'd reacted positively or negatively.

“If this makes you uncomfortable, I promise to never bring it up again.”

Silence. Again, Logan spoke, panicking now.

“I apologize for mentioning it. If you would drop me off at the CSU campus, that would be wonderful.”

Finally, Patton spoke, his voice low and sing-songy. “Two bros, chilling in a buffet. Five feet apart 'cuz they're so gay.”

“What?” What was Patton talking about? His verbal cues were giving him nothing—but he liked the sound of 'gay'. That seemed hopeful, didn't it?

“Logan, we haven't said a single word about Crofters all lunch. I was so flustered about trying to get you to like me, I wore a tie.” Patton's voice was shaking. Tears or laughter? Logan wondered frantically. “Logan, you can't see! How were you supposed to notice a tie?”

Then Logan was laughing, and Patton was laughing, an adorable little giggle accompanied by the occasional snort. Their hands ended up clasped over the table, and Logan, almost subconsciously, leaned over the table, somehow knowing that Patton was doing the same thing. Their laughter died down. Logan felt his forehead bump lightly against Patton's, his skin burning at the sudden impact, and he knew he was close enough.

“People are staring,” Patton whispered. Logan shrugged.

“I'm told people stare at me a lot,” he said. “I assume it's usually because I'm staring at them and don't realize.”

“And your dashing good looks,” said Patton playfully. Logan's cheeks burned—he hadn't expected this to happen. He liked where it was going, but what if Patton thought they were moving too fast? Just minutes ago, they'd been colleagues. Now they were . . . romantic interests? It happened so quickly, one could've blinked and missed it. That was surely too fast. Not to mention, Logan had a plethora of special needs. He didn't want to dump them all on someone so—so wonderful!

“Patton,” Logan said before anything could happen, “I've already confessed my attraction. But is it wise to continue? I-I am blind, after all.” The lame excuse fell flat on his ears. Patton seemed to find it a poor reason as well, as he squeezed Logan's hands and whispered a question.

“Would you like me to guide you to my lips, or just speak directions?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Roman wasn't upset. He truly wasn't! He was incredibly excited that Logan had a boyfriend. He'd already planned three perfect dates for them, including one that would be enjoyable for Crofters. He'd suggested a road trip to visit family, he was so certain their aunt would love Patton. Just the other day, he'd caught himself daydreaming about what songs would be best for their wedding dance. What could he say? He was an imaginative guy.

No, Roman definitely wasn't upset. But he was worried. He worried that Patton would never figure out exactly how to toast Logan's toast. He worried that Patton would always forget to set up the table correctly. What went where in the fridge. Where to find the type of clothes Logan liked to wear. When to let him walk to school and when to drive him. But most of all, Roman worried that Patton would get tired. Tired of all of Logan's needs and routines. Tired of holding Logan's hand when they crossed the road. Tired of having to shop for him. Tired of not being able to do normal things with him.

He was worried that Patton would abandon his brother, breaking Logan's heart in the process.

So who could blame him for growing more protective?

It all came to a head one day.

“Get in the car, I'll grab your cane. Crofters! Here, boy!” Roman called. Logan had just seen fit to inform him that he had an interview that day. He was certain that Logan would be a wonderful teacher's pet—aide for CSU, where he attended classes, but . . . Roman was going to miss an audition if he took Logan. He'd been really excited about it, too. He was auditioning to play Feste in Shakespeare's Twelfth Night , but . . . he found himself doing the math in his head. The drive to CSU was fifteen minutes counting traffic lights, then the interview would likely be longer. Then a good brother would take Logan out to eat, regardless of the results of the interview. The audition was half an hour away, just in the other direction. He couldn't make both. Logan's needs and wants came before his. He knew that.

Needless to say, Roman was very surprised when Logan didn't move. “Come on!” Roman urged. “We don't want to be late.”

“Patton has agreed to provide transportation to the interview. If he doesn't show up, we live within walking distance of the school,” Logan added, forestalling Roman's next argument.

Roman didn't really know what to do with himself. Patton picked up Logan and Crofters. Roman tried to watch TV. He tried to rehearse his monologue. Eventually he left, arriving early at the audition.

It went fine, as far as he could remember. Nothing like the auditions from his high school days, but probably okay. He couldn't stop thinking about Logan—was he safe? Would he get lost? Taken advantage of? Who would comfort him if he failed the interview?

Roman left the theater and drove. He didn't know where he was headed. He drove until he arrived at the mall.

Roman had often had fun at the mall—he and his twin, Remus, had often come here to mess around. He had dozens of pictures of Remus running through the kids' play area, or of he himself posing as a mannequin, dressed in the most uppity clothes they could find. The memories were nice enough to look back on, but they carried a melancholy air. He hadn't seen Remus in four years, since they were eighteen. His twin had moved across the country, scared of the responsibility of their younger brother Logan when their parents had died. Roman had had to grow up fast.

Through the smog of memories, Roman realized he'd wandered into Barnes & Noble, the smell of books reminding him of Logan in a comforting way.

“Welcome to Barnes & Noble. Can I help you find anything?”

Roman spun around. The clerk standing behind him let his bangs fall in front of his face and didn't even try to smile. Roman forgot his woes momentarily as he was struck with a second of gay panic. This clerk was hot . Like, skater gruff mountain man mixed with Tom Holland. An emo baby with scruff. The heir to the evil legacy who loves the good prince. The type of dude on the big poster in the window of the shoe store. His eyes caught the nametag—Virgil. Even his name was hot.

“Thank you, but I think I've just found what I'm looking for,” Roman found himself flirting. The clerk blushed and averted his eyes, muttering a small “whatever” and walking past. Roman turned to watch him go—was he hot from behind?

He didn't get to know, as the clerk turned as well and met his eyes. “Nice hair,” Virgil said, cheeks still red. “Purple. Looks . . . edgy.”

Roman laughed. A little too hard. It made Virgil smile, though, so maybe it was okay.

“My lunch break's in twenty minutes,” Virgil said. “Can I, uh. Can I get you some Panera?”

-

“—and I wasn't entirely certain that I'd done the character justice, you know? I know it was just a cold reading—”

“Dude, Roman. Calm down. I'm sure you did awesome,” laughed Virgil. The two were sitting in a booth at Denny's, hands entwined over the table.

Virgil was being reasonable, but it was so hard to calm down. Roman tried to change his train of thought and ended up thinking about Logan. His brother was representing CSU at a college fair. Roman had argued against it (“I'll have Crofters and Patton, I will be fine. Fracture a femur at the callbacks and enjoy your outing with your boyfriend.”) but had lost. His mind started spiraling again as he wondered: what if Patton forgot about Logan? What if someone dognapped Crofters? What if someone took advantage of his naive, blind, baby brother, who would be standing proudly at his school's table with a smile and a brochure? What if—

“In for four, Ro. In for four, hold for seven, out for eight. Breathe, and focus on my voice.”

Roman hadn't realized he was panicking outwardly, but he tried to do as Virgil instructed. The breathing didn't feel like it was helping, though, and soon he ignored the rhythm. He kept thinking about all the dangers Logan was in, and wished he could keep Logan in the safety of their routine, where nothing changed and nothing was unknown.

“Tell me five things you can see.”

Roman hadn't noticed that his eyes were closed. He blinked them open to find his vision blurry with tears. “A beautiful man,” he managed, eyes sweeping over his boyfriend then the restaurant. “Uh. The carpet. That painting of the dogs playing poker. That boy's hat. And the hanging light.”

“I love you, you're doing great. Four things you can touch?”

“The booth, your hand. The table. My phone in my pocket.” When had he become so tired?

“Nice,” Virgil said quietly. “Three things you can hear?”

“Your voice. Music, and the news playing on that TV.”

“Almost done, you're doing awesome. Two things you can smell?”

Roman sniffed. That was easy. “Your lasagna, the syrup from my pancakes.”

“And one thing you can taste.”

Roman licked his lips and grinned. “Your lasagna.”

Virgil rolled his eyes, but smiled anyhow. “Feel a bit better?”

Roman nodded. He was still worried, but it was better. The sleepiness that filled his veins made him not want to think about it. He wondered sometimes how Virgil always knew how to calm him down.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Roman took a deep breath, then nodded again.

-

“I have a brother,” Virgil said. They'd finished eating and relocated their conversation to Virgil's pick-up truck. There Roman had spoken his worries, confessed that he couldn't seem to stop being anxious about Logan.

“Not really, I guess. I mean, I think of him as my brother. My parents foster. So he's my foster brother, but that doesn't matter. His name's Dee.” Virgil ran a hand through his hair. He spoke again.

“Dee . . . can't talk. Something happened in his birth home—I dunno if he was born like that, or abuse or what—but it was hard. Hard to not try and take care of him. He's in pain a lot of the time. More often than not, he has to have a feeding tube because swallowing hurts too much.

“It was hard to let him go. Dee's such an individual!” Virgil laughed slightly. “He got into debate when he was thirteen. He's super good at it, too. I just—I couldn't stop worrying. What could someone do to a boy with no voice? A boy who can't say no. A boy who can't yell for help.”

Roman felt a pang of familiarity. He'd had very similar thoughts about Logan.

“When he was sixteen, we got into a fight,” Virgil continued. “He was yelling—I say yelling. His hands were moving angrily—, I was yelling, and he finally snapped. Dee told me I was too protective. He could handle himself. Bunch of other stuff. He ended up telling me that one of us was going to have to move out, and he was fine with it being him.

“I wasn't—he needed help, and our parents could help better than some roommate. So I left. Moved out of state.”

“How?” Roman heard himself whispering. He couldn't imagine ever doing that to Logan.

Virgil shrugged uneasily. “I was pretty mad. I was still anxious, though—for a while I called home every day. Heck, I texted Dee all the time to make sure he was okay. I stopped when he told me to. I got a job, enrolled in a few classes at CSU. It got easier. Dee skypes me on Sundays to ask about my week. It's okay.”

“Logan wouldn't kick me out, though,” Roman said bluntly. “He—”

“Can survive without you.”

“What?”

Virgil smiled and took his hand. “Logan can survive without you,” he repeated. “He has strengths, even if they're different from yours. It's okay to be scared. Scared of someone hurting him. But it sounds like. . . .”

“Yes?”

“It sounds like you're scared of him not needing you.”

Roman felt tears filling his eyes. That—that was it. He hated to admit it, but that was it. “Ay, there's the rub,” he choked out. He collapsed against Virgil's chest, his body shaking with sobs.

“It's okay . . . it's okay,” Virgil murmured.

“I just—I've been there for him since our parents d-died,” Roman sniffled. “My b-brother left us and Lo was so—so lost, and I-I love him so much! I packed his lunch when he was sixteen and drove him to school and got a job and gave up everything! Just to take care of him! He—he's my purpose! He's been my purpose for years! How—how can I just mo-move on?”

“No one expects you to just move on,” Virgil said, tracing small circles on Roman's back. “But I'm here to help you get through this, and so is Logan. It's going to be okay. Depend on us. It's all going to work out. It'll be okay.”

-

“You must be Patton. It's good to meet you,” Virgil said, shaking the bespectacled man's hand. Patton grinned at him, then gently pulled forward the man whose hand he was holding.

“That's me! This is my boyfriend, and his dog, Crofters.”

“Thank you for introducing my dog, Patton,” the man said dryly. Virgil knew his name before he said it. It wasn't just because Logan was attached to Patton, or the fact that his golden retriever was named Crofters, or even the classic sunglasses shielding his eyes. It was the smattering of freckles on his nose. It was the dimple in his right cheek as he smiled fondly in the direction of his boyfriend. It was the slightly round way his voice sounded. There was no doubt that this was Roman's brother.

“I'm Logan. I must presume that you are Virgil?”

Virgil ran a hand through his hair. “Yeah. How's the move going?”

Patton grinned. “Really well!” he said excitedly. “I'm definitely picking up on Lo's routines, and Crofters is adjusting too!”

“That's good. Let me know if you need to borrow my truck. Anything for Roman's family.” He tugged awkwardly at his stiff collar. He hated dressing up, but this was for Roman. “Shall we go in, then?”

They walked into the theater, making a chain of sorts: Virgil leading Patton by the hand to the seats he'd already reserved for them, Patton leading Logan by the hand so he didn't run into anyone (something, as Logan pointed out, Crofters could do just fine).

“Do you want to hear Roman's bio?” Patton asked Logan once they were settled in, the program held open in his hands.

“I'm relatively certain I edited it for him, but read on, love,” came Logan's reply.

“'Roman Sanders, Prospero—Roman Sanders is pleased to make his acting debut as Prospero in—'”

The lights flickered. One minute before the show. All around them, people began to sit. Patton closed the program and quietly informed Logan that the show was about to begin.

Then the curtains parted.

Patton watched Logan, hoping he was following the story, and grinned at the look of interest on his boyfriend's face as he settled back into his chair. Everything was okay.

Logan listened closely. He'd heard Roman's lines a million times when his brother rehearsed at home, but this was different. All the characters came together in a complex symphony that made him never want to stop listening. Everything was going okay.

Virgil watched Roman throw his arms dramatically, miming control of a giant storm while Shakespeare sang from his lips. He felt a surge of affection, of love, for the man who had come so far. Everything would be okay.

Roman caught a glimpse of his family in the audience and smiled inwardly. They'd all come, just to see him. Everything was okay. Everything was going okay. Everything would be okay. It was okay to move on.

[lionettea]

ok no one asked for this but here comes some moomin analysis!!

the last scene in Moominvalley episode 12 The Invisible Child with Too-Ticky and Moomin got me thinking about that ending song “Ready Now” and (of course not to distract from Ninny’s amazing story at all) but how the narrative seems to want us to ALSO consider this song in relation to Snufkin. keep reading for a rambly analysis of why I think so LOL. its long read at ur own discretion lol

(moominvalley spoilers if you’re not caught up!)

Alright alright alright so first off. When Too-Ticky tells Moomin to watch out for other lost souls, at first I thought it was going to be a touching but generalized message to the viewers to look for invisible children in their own life (very good) but THEN-- after Moomin thinks for a sec he seems to realize something, and then as the music starts the camera pans over to where Snufkin is walking away.

stuff like that in animation is rarely coincidence and usually super planned out, so it’s not a far leap to think the song also relates to Moomin and Snufkin!!!

Before I get into lyrics I wanna point out a few things about Moomin. Bless that guy. So I’m obviously not 100% on what Moominvalley canon is as far as how long he and Snufkin have known each other & what adventures they’ve already gone on before the first ep, but it’s clear that they’re already good enough friends that Moomin knows how to respect his space, even in Snufkin’s mind/memory.

And he is able to guide others in doing the same (like when he stops Sniff from continuing to bug Snufkin after Snufkin has reached his limit)

I think this experience helped him tremendously when it came to Ninny! Out of everyone there (besides Moominmama, where he must have learned his patience from) he is able to intuit her needs the best of everyone and is most effective in making her feel welcome! (probably from having dealt with Snufkin so much, or maybe its just in his nature) It works well until he gets ahead of himself and starts talking over her/thinks he knows what she needs without listening to her. This fails, and he quickly realizes what he did wrong and makes amends and is the first to realize how important it is to LISTEN! and then he explains that to the others.

Moomin’s ability to understand and be friends with uhhhh basically everyone he meets is nothing to sneeze at AND is pretty unique to his character when you think about it. More than anyone else (excluding Moominmama cuz she’s God Tier) he shows again and again --even when it may take some time-- that he has the patience to get to know someone and find value in them, no matter how different they are from him or how annoying they are to other characters. We see this in Sniff, the ghost, the ancestor, Little My, Ninny, (a hint of it with the groke), Snorkmaiden, Moominpapa, Too-Ticky, etc. etc. (and way more in the books but I’m just talking about Moominvalley for now) and of course our dear Nuuskamuikkunen.

Basically Moomin is really good at at least giving empathy a shot, something not every character can do (moominpappa, little my, and sniff can be kinda bad at it). That kind of caring can be life changing to someone who hasn’t really had much understanding before! 

Which brings us back to Snufkin, who’s privacy/introversion isn’t often respected/understood.

To the point where (even though he DOES like people!!!) he often gets overwhelmed and can’t see any way out besides to just- leave. Like he left Moomin at the party, like he left moomin & sniff at his own campfire with an abrupt “sleep well”, & how he leaves every winter. 

And why does Snufkin act like that? I really hope Moominvalley dives into it!! *rubs hands together* Besides it just being his Nature or whatever, in the books it says that he was found abandoned in a box (if memory serves) and basically grew up totally on his own as a wanderer and never had a home of his own and DEFINITELY never had anyone he could rely on besides himself. When you grow up that unstable, its no wonder you might want to take the stability into your own hands anyway you can. Why form strong attachments if they’re not going to last, or if it means you have to give up an integral part of yourself/your freedom/the only thing you’ve been able to control? This is just speculation though (I’m still reading the books too and I’m curious if the show will even address his past much at all!)

Anyway, considering how often he’s misunderstood even in super friendly Moominvalley who knows what he experienced elsewhere. It’s easier to retreat inward and fall back on to relying on yourself and no one else. The fact he views strong connections to people as something that can cage you/prevent you from being free, reveals a lot about the relationships/lack of relationships he’s probably known. however. we keep seeing hints that Snufkin isn’t always.. totally okay with this. we see that sometimes Snufkin needs company too.

(It’s also worth noting that when Snufkin realizes he feels lonely he assumes he must be sick or something because it feels so at odds with his identity. THE BABY DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO DEAL.)

He really has no idea how to grapple with the concept of Sometimes Needing People. He doesn’t know how to admit it to himself let alone others. In general despite spouting a lot of generic wise hot-topic-like phrases of advice (hehe i love them), when it comes to explaining himself to others (ESPECIALLY MOOMIN) he has NO idea what to do. which is seen in him stuttering and being evasive and hurrying away whenever questioned LOL.

Even when he does think he understands himself and is happy with his own solitude, he gets kinda knocked down a peg with both Titi-uu and Little My/the woodies. Both instances leave him realizing that, while being alone is great, company can also have some benefits!

Okay now we’re ready for the song “Ready Now” (hehe) and Moomin & Snufkin’s relationship. To Snufkin, someone as considerate and unendingly patient and loving as Moomintroll is probably still new, foreign, and full of constant surprises! (he was so shocked when Moomin wasn’t mad about the party thing...)

“You saw through me all this time I'd forgotten people are kind”

Even though Snufkin cares deeply for Moomintroll & does NOT hesitate to help him in a pinch and often goes against his solitude nature in order to comfort him (letting moomin&sniff eat by his fire, letting the dragon go), when it comes to verbalizing his OWN needs he struggles. And yet, Moomin somehow still seems to understand him and is gentle and forgiving (again with the hemulen’s jail, he never demanded an explanation or even an apology, he just wanted to help his best friend despite being stood up haha). 

Point is Moomin seems to be able to understand how to connect with Snufkin in an effective way.

“I was hurting and you knew So you showed me what to do You said "I will listen, tell it all When you're finished we'll talk more" But I didn't know how so we took it in turns To my surprise we found my words”

If Snufkin will open up to anybody it’s Moomin. And we’re talking year after year slow burn.... You can even tell that Snufkin wants to open up as seen in his imaginary conversation with Snow-Moomin. That’s the best back and forth convo they had specifically about Snufkin’s needs and it was in his head.... orz... (just talk to him you KNOW he’d understand...)

But, as revealed in this conversation, a big thing he talked about was not being ready (specifically to come back to Moominvalley, but the way it’s framed hints it’s also about other things as well) and now these lyrics....

“Feet firm on the ground, We stood hand in hand The world seemed to tell me That I have a plan Together we sang

I'm ready now.”

Obviously a big part of Snufkin’s character is that he doesn’t do things the conventional/common way at all. He very much does his own thing and won’t let anyone else threaten that. But the thing about Moomin is that understands/tries to! Moom doesn’t want to force him into a lifestyle or role that Snuf doesn’t want to fulfill, he just wants to be with Snufkin in whatever way works, even if its unconventional.

“You said "I will listen, tell me it all You don't like the ending? Then we'll find one that's yours."

To have someone who’s willing to work with him like this, big or small-- This is probably new to Snufkin!!! Or at least, maybe Moomin has always tried to put that out there, but it’s taken a while for Snufkin to finally start to believe/understand/trust that? He used to think building a strong relationship would mean sacrificing a part of himself, but maybe learn to see that he wouldn’t have to? He’s growing! and its a good grow!

“Something new, something strange Ten feet taller, I had changed I believe you, I'm not wrong Oh, it suits me to feel strong“

There’s that little bit of euphoria where he realizes.. caring about someone deeply can be a really good and positive thing.

And finally... remember how all of Snufkin’s life and identity revolves around wanting to be free? And how at first he thought being free meant to have no strong attachments? But maybe... just maybe... after working in loving tandem with Moomin....

“Oh, how did you know? That's all we need? A promise of hope Is enough to feel free.”

:’) the end

the potential is all carefully set up and there, I’m so excited to see what Moominvalley does with it! Especially since Moomin’s storyline seems to be revolving around him becoming more independent and finding his own, while Snufkin’s is about learning it’s okay to need others. They meet in the middle.

But things are never quite that easy in Moominvalley, so who knows how lost we’ll see snufkin before he gets “found”...? or vise versa. I can’t wait to find out!!!!

[normal-thoughts-official]

Idea--Shadowhunter training might not go into sex further than 'have kids' but it's brutal and rigorous. So Alec is used to hiding noises, so much so that he's quiet during sex. Magnus of course, worries. Is he doing something wrong? Why hasn't Alec said anything to him? Is he not attracted to him and just trying to spare his feelings? They do talk about it... eventually. Maybe after a smackeral of angst.

jdjdjdndidndidndi i thought you meant that shadowhunters are specifically trained to hide their sex noises im so fucking stupid dudndidndidnk i swear to god that i can read

but that's.... an interesting idea actually. i tend to think that wasnt really how it went cuz i do get the impression that once Alec decided to have sex he really let it go and got into it, u know, plus i may or may not be a lil attached to my "Alec is great at dirty talk" headcanons lmao. on the other hand.... amgst

also i mean while i do think that once Alec decided to say fuck it he really said fuck it, and that tbh he had been repressing for so long that once he got what he wanted he was all but helpless to stop himself from diving right in, there are things that eventually become second nature. that u never even stop to think about. and that shock you when you realize they can be a different way. so yeah, i could see that too, this kind of "doesnt let go of soldier mode even in a completely different setting" thing. and if i were Magnus id legit cry idndjxmxixmdk like if my partner looked kinda neutral and disinterested?? not to mention noises are some of the best parts. #LetTopsMoan2020

also u can easily throw in that sweet trans magnus angst of course u kno, like "he seemed into it at first but then he saw my body and he just.... wasn't. maybe he's attracted to me because i pass but when he gets to see my full body thats too much for him. it's fine. it's happened before. maybe if i do better he won't mind it too much - it was just the first time, i just need to figure out what he likes" so he goes on this little disguised quest to figure out what turns Alec on, and it just leaves him more confused, because alec jumps on him as soon as he gets the chance but then it's just.... the same. silent, looking more focused than in pleasure, and it just made magnus feel more self conscious of his moans and screams u know. so eventually he starts to not get into it, because it just makes him more insecure anyway, and maybe he should just offer to use a glamor or something, because clearly his body turns Alec off so much nothing he does can help it-

and meanwhile Alec just. adores his body and loves every moment of having sex with him, loves eating him out, loves the way he moans. but also i mean there's the inevitable part where he's not fully letting himself enjoy it, because he's still holding back, still seeing it as some kind of exercise. tbh we all know alec's an overachiever and he's probably so focused on giving Magnus pleasure, on doing well, on performing that he doesn't allow himself to fully get into it. he enjoys it, of course he does, but he doesn't even know that theres so much more to it than the tiny part that he's allowing himself to feel

and the thing is, Magnus knows exactly what that's like, because for the longest time he saw sex as a service he did for others, too. theres obviously the Camille sexual abuse part, the way he felt like pleasuring her was what would earn him love, affection, even respect, make up for his other flaws, for his body. but also there's the post-camille stuff, the way he threw himself into sex as a coping mechanism, to feel more in control of his own body. but he never fully allowed himself to relax and get into it and would rather focus on his partner. because it felt too dangerous to let go. because he had a role to play, and something to prove. and that's exactly what he feels from Alec right now

so they're both a little tense and focusing way too much on the others' pleasure and communicating way too little and it's all pretty ironic, but Magnus doesn't realize that until the talk inevitably happens. and it's heartbreaking, because he eventually approaches Alec to ask him if he wants him to use a glamor, and Alec is all like what are you talking about i told you i love your eyes? and Magnus has to explain and Alec is like *jazz music stops*

because he really never stopped to think about it and he didn't notice and he didnt even know that he was doing it? and it's all kind of heartbreaking because Magnus tells him that he knows what it's like and recounts all of his previous sex problems and Alec is appalled. and Magnus even kind of admits that he had been trying to get Alec to enjoy it for so long and he didn't know what to do anymore- and Alec's like i think we've both been idiots

so they agree to redo it, only taking it slow this time. long sessions of kissing and making out and dry humping and exploring each other and themselves. and you know, Alec is pretty much only confident when it comes to direct, clear verbal communication, so he starts to be all like "love it when you moan like this," "you look so pretty when you spread your legs for me," and Magnus is helplessly turned on by it and it shows and Alec goes "oh, you like it, dont you?" delighted and surprised and that only gets Magnus more hot and thats when they find out that Alec loves to talk during sex, and Magnus loves to hear him :)

and from then on things sail smoothly djdndjxn and its an amazing experience for them both, to learn (and in magnus' case, relearn) to trust each other and their bodies, to enjoy themselves, to let go. it's amazing and they couldn't be happier to do it with each other :)

[casualcatte]

RP Journal: 08/03/2020

The hunt… was not as clean as I would’ve wanted, but we got the job done. My shoulder still hurts like the blazes, but at least it’s not infected. I underestimated how difficult this hunt would be and I wasn’t as prepared for it as I should have been. I don’t know where my head was at.  Too much of the nonsense in Ul’dah, I suppose. Too many distractions.

[ Courtesy Cut for Length -- Are these ever short?! ]

I should’ve been out in the Azim Steppe days ago, reconnoitering, getting to know the temperament of the environment. The Steppe is a nearly flat expanse with some low scrub brush and rocky outcroppings. There’s almost no windbreak and it changes constantly. I’d set up my shots only for a sudden gust of wind to sweep them off target. It was aggravating. What should have been a number of easy shots for me ended up with me looking like a rank amateur in front of Lorrendor.  Of course, he didn’t do much better; I think the wind gusts got to him as much as I.

Still, the beast was dead by the end of it and only I took any injury, which I was grateful for. The last thing I would’ve wanted was for Lor to get injured on a hunt I drafted him for. He fretted though. And he did that thing I hate.  Gods.  What is it with men that want to treat me like I’m made of glass?  That I’m some delicate thing that they have to protect and save?

I know Lor has a checkered past with the people he cares about.  I know he lost someone he loved. Gods only know I have too. I know it’s what drives him to be so overprotective. I know that, but it still irritates me. It’s the same nonsense that got Tristane killed.  I don’t want someone else dying over me or for me. Fight with me and beside me, treat me as an equal. If I mess up and get myself injured, call me out on it so we can fix it for next time. Treat me like I’m your partner, not just some defenseless tag-along.

Once the bounty was collected, we went back to Kugane and Lor continued to fret, saying he failed me, and that it should’ve been him that got injured. I’m not going to lie, it rankled. It got under my skin worse than Edgard. Time and again, I see the flashfires of memory, Tristane throwing himself at the Alpha in order to keep me out of it. Going against the entire plan that we made, trying to ensure that I wouldn’t get hurt. I suppose it’s supposed to be endearing, it’s supposed to mean that they care /so very much/ -- but by every god in the Twelve I hate it.

The hunt wasn’t a failure, but it wasn’t a shining moment either. Lorrendor was being overprotective and… and… I don’t even know.  /Emotional/ about it. The last thing I wanted was Edgard to show up, but /surprise/ he did. He’s staying at the Bokairo like the rest of us, so I suppose we were bound to run into him a time or two. But ye gods, couldn’t he have had better timing? It seemed the Fates were against me on all sides today.

Edgard was Edgard, although, also not Edgard. He didn’t tease me as much about the hunt as I expected, despite the fact that he overheard I’d missed four shots. I told him I wasn’t in the mood for his antics. He listened, somewhat.

Then he asked me out to dinner.

Supposedly to make up for the terrible offer of drinks he’d made in Ul’dah, then subsequently abandoned me in order to deal with his brother. Considering Edgard didn’t know anyone in Kugane but me, I thought it was a low-risk proposition of having a repeat occurrence. I agreed, then went to clean up and change. It wasn’t the soak in the hot springs I’d longed for since the hunt ended, but I found I was starving, so the offer of food wouldn’t go unappreciated.

We adjourned from the Bokairo once I was presentable and went to the Shiokaze. I adore their steamed dumplings, and Edgard said I could have anything I wanted.  And that he was paying. And, thankfully, /not/ calling it a date. All of which would’ve been fine, if Kotokaze behind the bar hadn’t been encouraging him. Gods, I swear everyone wants to encourage him. Why does no one say, Edgard, you are a cad and a lascivious fiend, you leave that girl alone at once! 

Once you get him away from an audience and a peanut gallery, though, Edgard becomes a vastly different person. It only solidifies my thought that the debonair, devil-may-care ladies’ man is just a smoke screen so that no one gets close enough to get to know the real Edgard. So no one gets close enough to hurt him.  So no one gets close enough for him to care for.

Just like Lorrendor’s loss affects how he acts, so, too, does Edgard’s.  Except Edgard uses his as a reason to push people away, to keep them at bay so they never quite reach his heart. He doesn’t want to be hurt again, like Lorrendor, so he just tries not to have anyone to care about. And yet, he still does. He’s admitted as much in his own way. 

I think that’s why I indulge his verbal games of parry-and-riposte with me, because it’s the closest he allows himself to any sort of real friendship. Every once in a while, though, I see a crack in the facade, a moment of vulnerability when the real Edgard peeks through. Or moments like on the Airship Landing before I left for Kugane again. I don’t know if he’ll ever be that real and genuine with me again, but it’s nice to know that version of him is in there, somewhere. It makes the insufferable version of him easier to bear!

Still, dinner was nice. Lorrendor eventually showed up, which I hadn’t expected in the least. Given the conversation I’d had with him the night prior, how much he disapproved of Edgard and his attitudes, I never thought I’d see the two of them sharing a drink. Yet, here they were.

I’ll likely regret them ever getting on friendly terms, Oschon only knows Edgard never needs to hear about Lorrendor joking about taking flirtation lessons from him.  Even if Lor said it in jest, Edgard would never let either of us live it down. The two of them seemed to get along well enough, though, mostly through teasing and picking on me. (Again, adding to my regret at this bread-breaking.) I say that mostly in jest, though. I’m glad they can be friends, given their colorful history thus far, as I understand it. I still laughed and it would have made for a nice nightcap to the evening.

Until Edgard left. It was like the sun had disappeared behind the clouds, because the mood in the room changed that drastically. Lorrendor took me to task for the jokes I’d made about him marrying Edgard. I knew it was a sensitive subject for him, I would never make the joke about a woman, but I figured a man -- Edgard of all of them -- would have been safe enough territory. It wasn’t and that was a poor error on my part. I told him I wouldn’t joke about it again. Gods, I won’t joke about relationships at all, if it gets me admonished like a little girl. I apologized, though, it was thoughtless of me.

Perhaps it was the wine, I’ve never had much of a head for it, but I felt tired. Bone-achingly, mind-numbingly tired. Lorrendor hugged me at some point again going on about how he’d “nearly lost me.”  I suffered some claws, it wasn’t as if the thing had torn a chunk out of me with its teeth!  Either I was going to stab it to death or Lorrendor was going to shoot it. I had faith enough in that to not have my life flash before my eyes. Menphina’s Light, after losing Tristane to the Bandersnatch Alpha, I wasn’t about to let myself get eaten by the Bara Alpha!

I just felt numb and like I’d just done everything wrong today. Nothing had gone at all like I planned, my shoulder hurt unbearably now from where Lor had leaned into it for his hug. I just wanted to sleep, get this day over with, and try for a better day tomorrow.

I thought about going for a soak in the hot springs before I slept, but I’d either fall asleep in the water and drown -- or I’d find Edgard there in naught but his birthday suit.  Neither option appealed to me, so I opted for bed.

Oschon’s Weary Soles, let tomorrow be a better day.

(Bonus screenshot, just cuz I liked this one)

[jeffxwittek]

Face Down (Part 2) | Jeff x Reader x Boyfriend

A/N: i’m mad at myself for not double checking that google docs saved what i added in part one, so i guess i just have to attempt from here to fix the mess part 1 was... hope you enjoy? - oh and the first part doesnt have jeff but JEFF ALL THE WAY IN THE SECOND HALF I PROMISE. not as much fluff as i would like in this. and also heres a link to the song face down since i didn’t put it with part 1 as well -- part 3 is def gonna happen btw

Plot: It’s the day after your friends found out how your boyfriend treats you and they are trying hard to be supportive, especially Jeff. (Under KEEP READING cuz it’s kinda long?) Warnings: Mentions of abuse (physical & verbal), cheating (i’m against it, but it worked with the story)

You’re sleeping on the couch in David’s living room as you hear the quick footsteps of Natalie and David moving around in the kitchen in attempts to not wake you. You open your eyes and don’t move as to not surprise your two friends. You just lay silent and listen to them have their conversation

“I never liked him,” you hear Natalie say in a blunt whisper.

“None of us did. We just didn’t think he was hurting her,” you notice him sigh and hear him put something down on the counter.

“It must have broken Jeff last night to see what went down,” Natalie says.

Jeff? Why would Jeff be broken? Yes, he’s my friend so he cares about me, but broken? You run through the thought process as you continue to silently lay on the couch.

“For a guy who puts up a front of being this bad-ass ex-convict, he’s totally soft when it comes to Y/N. He won’t actually admit it though,” David states.

You know it’s time to let them know you’re awake and raise your arm above the back cushion of the couch. “’Morning,” you greet them with a raspiness in your voice. You slide off the couch and make your way into the kitchen to meet with them.

David and Natalie both look surprised like they were caught doing or saying something they weren’t supposed to. 

You nod your head over to the coffee maker. “May I?”

They both respond in unison, “Yeah.”

You pull a mug from the cabinet above and pour yourself coffee and head over to the fridge for some milk. “So,” you turn around to them and place the coffee and milk on the counter. “I want to say that I’m sorry for last night. Thomas and I had been fighting all day. We really shouldn’t have come last night. I didn’t mean to cause a scene. I feel horrible about putting you all in the middle of that. I just thought that if we were around other people it would stop the bickering for a couple hours, but I guess not. He’s just stressed out at work and I upset him and--.” You quickly get cut off by David.

“Y/N. No. Don’t apologize. You did nothing wrong. You came over here to hang out and have a fun time with your friends and that douchebag ruined it.” David says trying to comfort you.

“He’s really not that bad. I know the past couple times he’s been around it seems that way, but he’s just rough around the edges. He’s not horrible. I promise”

David rolls his eyes and lets out a sigh. “Not horrible? Y/N. Listen to me. I’ve seen plenty of people in my life be in fucked up relationships and I can see that he doesn’t treat you right. We call can. We just never suspected he was hurting you.”

You act taken about. “Hurting me?” You almost yell the question. “He’s not hurting me!”

“Then how’d you get the bruise, Y/N?” Natalie jumps in.

“On my chest? Like I told Corinna last night, I dropped my curling iron! Not a big deal! It slipped!” You walk past David and Natalie towards the front door.

“Where are you going?!” David yells after you. “We’re trying to help you!”

You spin back around to look at the two of them. “If you were trying to help, you would listen. Everything’s fine! We’re just in a rough patch right now.” You slide on your shoes from the night before and grab your purse before looking at them again. “Now if you don’t mind, I’m going to go back home to my boyfriend.” You sigh and look at David. “Thank you for the coffee. I’ll see you later.” You walk out of the house and slam the door without another word or looking back.

The moment you step outside though, you realize Thomas drove you here and you have no way back home. You could call him, but he would try to fight with you the whole time. An Uber? Too expensive. You look down at your phone and try to think of who to call. Jeff. You remember the conversation with him last night and he said if you need anything, to tell him. You open your contacts and scroll to his name. You hover your thumb over his name for a second before hitting the screen and putting the phone up to your ear. You feel like it rings forever before it picks up on the other end.

“Hello?” You hear a muffled, tired voice on the other end.

“Oh. Geez. I’m sorry. Did I wake you? I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to. I’ll call someone else. Go back to bed.” You start to pull the phone away from your ear as you hear him say something.

“No, no. It’s okay. I need to get up anyway and feed Nerf. What’s up?” Jeff sounds concerned as the words escape from his mouth.

You’re quiet for a second unsure what to actually say and just breath into the phone.

“Y/N. Are you okay?” Jeff says as you hear him moving things around on his end.

“Um, yeah. I just-- Could you pick me up at David’s? I didn’t know who else to call.”

“I’ll be right there. Meet you at the curb?”

“Meet you at the curb. Thank you, Jeff.” You hang up the phone and make your way down David’s driveway and past his gate to wait at the curb for Jeff.

--

It feels like forever before Jeff pulls up and you climb into the passenger seat. “Thank you so much for picking me up. Thomas left with the car last night and so I had no way home.”

“It’s no problem. I would have been here sooner but I had to stop for this.” He picks a coffee cup out of the middle cupholder and hands it to you. “White mocha, extra whip cream.”

“You didn’t have have to get me coffee,” You say as you take the cup from him. “But, thank you.” You take a long sip as the warm liquid fills your body and you instantly feel better after the argument you had with Natalie and David. “How’d you know I like white mocha’s?”

Jeff let’s out a small laugh. “Because that’s the only thing ya order anytime we go anywhere and ya refuse to go to the coffee shop around the corner because they don’t have it on their menu.” He starts to pull away from the curb and drive down the road.

“What kind of coffee place doesn’t have a white mocha?” You almost scream. “It’s essential to have on any coffee menu.” You take another sip of the drink before placing it back in the cupholder. “Thank you again, though.”

Silence fills the car for a minute before Jeff finally speaks up. “So you and Thomas. What’s the deal?”

“What do you mean?” You respond acting oblivious to the situation that played out the night before.

“I don’t mean to be blunt, Y/N.” He sighs and you see him fiddle with his fingers on the steering wheel. “But, does he hurt ya? Physically?”

There it is. The one question everyone wanted to ask last night. Your mind thinks and attempts to come up with a lie, yet you come up with nothing.

“I provoke him. It’s really not his fault. I just need to be careful on what I do and say.” You’re silent for a moment. “Plus I need to be careful on what I wear and who I talk to. Those are just some things that upset him.” You hear no response from Jeff, but you see him drive right past your street. “Jeff! Where are you going?”

“I’m taking you to my place,” Jeff says as he continues to drive to his apartment.

“You can’t make me go to your apartment. Pull over and I’ll just get out here,” You say with demand in your tone.

Jeff pulls into a parking lot and stops his car. As you reach for the door handle he locks the car. “What the fuck, Jeff?” You almost yell at him and pound your foot on the floorboard of his car.

He turns to look at you after pulling his keys out of the ignition. “First, stop acting like a child. Second, tell me why ya wanna go back to see him. And third, can’t ya tell I’m tryin’ help ya?” He looks at you with pleading eyes and reaches for your hand and you quickly pull away.

“He’s my boyfriend. Even if we don’t always get along, we’re together and I need to go home and see him.” You let out a heavy sigh you didn’t know you were holding in and whisper to yourself, “I just hope he’s still not mad about last night.

“Damnit, Y/N. Can’t ya see that you deserve so much better? You’re smart and funny and energetic. You light up a room when you walk into it. Find someone who matches that and will help bring those qualities out more.”

“And who’s gonna do that, Jeff? People aren’t really lined up to date me. If you can’t tell, I’m kind of a mess and--.”

Next thing you know Jeff’s lips are crashing into your’s and you find your arms quickly wrapping around his neck. You can suddenly smell the mixture of toothpaste and coffee from his breath and feel how his lips are slightly chapped.

Fuck. What am I doing? I’m with Thomas! But, this feels amazing. You run through your head everything that makes this so wrong and so right at the same time. After what feels like forever, you pull away and see Jeff quickly wipe his bottom lip with his thumb.

“I-- Um-- I’m sorry.” Jeff stutters out the words and fumbles with his keys picking them up from the dashboard. “I shouldn’t have done that.” He nervously puts the keys back in the ignition and starts the car. After backing up and starting his way out of the parking lot, he tells you he’ll take you back to your apartment. “If ya really wanna go back home, I’ll take ya. But I need ya to promise that the moment something happens, ya give me a call.”

“Can we actually just go to your place right now?” You reach for his arm that’s now sitting on the middle console. You suddenly wanted to be with Jeff a little longer. “I think some hanging out away from Thomas a little longer is something I need.”

“Of course. My apartment it is.”

The rest of the drive is silent, yet you feel at peace knowing you don’t have to go back home to your boyfriend just yet.

—

Soon enough Jeff is parking his car in the parking garage and jumps out to run to your side of the car before you can unbuckle. He opens the door for you and helps you out. 

“Well, thank you, sir,” you joke as you shift your purse strap onto your shoulder. You follow Jeff up the stairs to his place and walk in to notice bits and pieces that you’ve only ever seen in videos.

You place your purse against the wall by the front door and follow Jeff into his kitchen. “Um, I don’t mean to bother you about this. But do you have anything I could change into?” You look down at your jeans and shirt from the night before. “I’m just a bit uncomfortable.”

“Yea. Be right back.” Jeff disappears for a moment and comes back with a large t-shirt and sweats. “I tried to find the smallest sweats I had, so I hope these work.”

You take the clothes from Jeff and thank him before making your way to the bathroom to change. You look in the bathroom mirror and notice that your makeup is smeared and your hair is a mess. You use some tissues to wipe off your makeup and comb your hair with your fingers before putting it up into a bun. You change into the t-shirt and sweats only to find that the sweats drop straight back down to your ankles. At least the shirt covers my butt, you think to yourself. You walk out of the bathroom and notice Jeff sitting on the couch with the TV on. You put your folded clothes by your bag and walk over to him. 

He notices you walk over and quickly realizes you’re not wearing pants. “Sweats too big?”

“Just a tad. I can throw my jeans back on if you want me to,” you say as you point over towards your stuff.

Jeff shakes his head. “No, no. It’s okay. C’mon and sit.” He pats the couch cushion right next to him.

You sit down next to him and plop your feet up on the coffee table. “So, about that kiss--”

“I’m so sorry about that. I shoulda taken the cue you were upset.” He turns to look at you and you can tell he really is sorry.

“It’s okay. It pulled me out of my little panic mode.”

“But, I did notice something.”

“And what’s that?” You look at him and cock your head to the side intrigued with what he’s about to say.

He licks his top lip and adjusts himself to face you, placing his arm on the back of the couch. “You kissed me back,” he says with a smirk.

You close your eyes for a moment and let a long breath out. “That I did.”

Jeff rubs the back of his neck with his and you can tell he’s nervous. “I know this may be inappropriate, but can I kiss ya again? Saying no is okay.”

You squeeze your lips together suddenly very thankful for the lip treatments you’ve been doing at home. You lean in and gently kiss Jeff and can’t help but smile at how warm his lips feel. Next thing you know his hands are on your waist and pulling you onto his lap. You let out a small laugh and pull away from his lips. “Should we be doing this?” You look at him with questioning eyes and hope he gives you the answer you want.

“Only if ya want to,” he says.

You’re silent for a moment. “I want to.” You grab his cheeks in your hands. “I really want to.”

—

Next thing you know an alarm is going off and as you open your eyes Jeff is rolling over to grab his phone. You suddenly remember that you haven’t checked your phone since Jeff picked you up the day before. Fuck. You run to check your phone and have what seems like 100 messages from Thomas.

“Nice job being a bitch last night.”

“Having fun with your idiot friends?”

“Not replying? Fine. Make me angry.”

“Do you like pissing me off?”

“Where the hell are you Y/N? Stop being a baby and come home.”

“You are in for so much shit when I see you.”

Your mind is racing as you read through all the messages of anger and threats sent to you. As your vision is beginning to be impaired by tears filling your eyes, you feel a set of strong hands on your shoulders and you jump while letting out a scream.

“Hey, hey. It’s just me.” Jeff spins you around and lifts your chin so you make eye contact with him. “It’s just me. You’re okay.” He goes to rub your upper arm before he notices your phone and all the messages that Thomas has sent. He grabs the phone from your hand and starts to read them.

“Jeff!” You yell with a crack in your voice and attempt to reach for your phone. “Give that to me! It’s private!”

“Y/N. He’s threatening ya. This isn’t normal. This isn’t healthy!” He places the phone in his pocket. “You’re not getting this back right now. Ya need to separate yourself from him.”

You start hitting his chest with your fists and screaming. “Jeff! Give me my phone! I need my phone! I need to go home! He’s mad!” You can feel your cheeks turning red and notice your limbs going week as you fall into Jeff. You let out a small crying whimper.

Jeff finds his way to the ground and holds you close to him and rubs your arms and back calming you down. “Look what he’s doing do you, Y/N.”

“I don’t know what to do.” You cry into his chest while trying to catch your breath.

Jeff let’s out a heavy sigh. “We’ll figure something out, Y/N. I promise.” He continues to rub your back while your tears fade away and you fall asleep right there in his lap while he sits on the floor.