#def the first time he’s ever taken a shower

[kalopsia1sblog]

“Pervert”

Fyodor x Fem! Reader

DOA kidnaps reader-masturbation, noncon voyuerism, Fyodor is possessive, literally don’t know what else to tag

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fyodor sat at his computer watching as you were dragged kicking and screaming back to your room with it being the third time you tried to escape this week. He was disappointed in your refusal to give up and accept the new conditions you lived in; and it wasn’t like you didn’t live in splendor, as the Decay of Angels has given you only the best per you being his newest toy. He just couldn’t understand why you didn’t do as you were told. He let out a tortured sigh, continually in this cycle of wondering why you couldn’t just be content with your new life. Immediately after you were thrust back into your room and the door was locked, he watched in surprise as you smoothed down your hair and walked to the bathroom to take a shower. Obviously he had cameras there too, because you couldn’t be trusted to be on your own. Watching you undress and step into the running water without realizing that you were being watched was so degrading that Fyodor felt disgusted with himself as he released himself from the confines of his pants, his dick springing free.

Grunting, he stroked himself roughly, watching as you washed yourself, taking away all the feeling from having been manhandled earlier, discarding all impurities. Fondling his tip that was beaded with precum, he was almost at his release when you were conditioning your hair. It was so perverted, so creepy what his actions were that as he cummed, the thick ropes of white spilling all over his hand, he got up and went to go wash himself off.

Angrily he muttered under his breath, “This filthiness goes against the will of God.” At the same time he said this, you walked out into the hallway, bumping into him. Confused, you looked up at him, but without a word he turned around and walked the other way. He could only assume with how distant he was towards you, that you assumed he had no wanting towards you the same way the other members of the DOA did.

Oh how wrong you were.

Later on, walking into the common area for the DOA to convene within the sky casino, Fyodor had taken a shower to rid himself of the vile sin he committed. However, seeing Nikolai entertain you with clownish tricks, and Sigma lay his head onto your shoulder, he was struck by a possessiveness that he didn’t know he had. Again, choosing to ignore you in light of this, he walked over to the window to ponder these new feelings. Continually hearing Nikolai and Sigma pepper you with attention and affection despite knowing how many times you had tried to escape from their hold was irritating; with their chosen ignorance of your actions. Sigma believed you were something to be cherished, and Nikolai decided that it was he who should break you through his insanity.

Fyodor held neither of these sentiments, though watching you run around to manipulate Sigma into letting you go, and dealing your life with Nikolai’s psychopathy was somewhat amusing, even though it seemed like you were forgetting who you belonged to.

He decided that it would be better for him to remind you.

Every now and then he would make small conversation with you, asking about music you enjoyed, and books he reccomended to you. From how you decided to start following him whenever he went out of the casino, the plot he hatched seemed to be working. Of course, he made sure you couldn’t escape while he was gone, locking all the passageways and exits. Then, one day when he was sure that you wouldn’t think much of him “forgetting” to lock one of the exits, he walked out and waited for your sure getaway.

Seeing you wander outside, looking triumphant, he watched as you dimwittedly jumped for joy. He almost felt bad when he stepped behind you and covered your hand with his mouth, restraining you.

“Dear, you didn’t think I would actually forget to conveniently keep an exit unlocked?” He sneered, your horrified expression bringing him unmatched pleasure.

“I…I thought you didn’t want me the same way those two do. I thought you would be alright with me going.” You quietly muttered.

Placatingly, Fyodor smiled and said, “I don’t need to want you the way they do. You’re already mine.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/n: BSD new ep spoilers/JJK 236 CHP spoilers:

SO FYODOR IS FUCKING DEAD? Like I’m part of Dazai nation too woohoo let’s go but I didn’t want Fyodor to die he’s my hot little anemic Russian man and GOJO IS FUCKING DEAD TOO? LIKE IM STILL A GOJO GLAZER FOR LIFE BUT YALL WHY ARE ASAGIRI AND AKUTAMI KILLING OFF THE CHARACTERS I LIKE??

[yawnderu]

i scroll through your page every day like it’s my freaking newspaper omg thank you for all the bimbo!reader content 😭😭🥰

this is kind of going off of your post of reader pampering simon and johnny calling him a pretty boy lol

idk if you’ve ever heard of the boyfriend effect? it’s like this silly (but true) theory that men go through a glow up when getting into a relationship 😅😅

but i def see that in simon. like after getting with reader, he’s taking more pride in his appearance. his muscles aren’t just to keep him at the top of his job but he loves the way you drool over them. or he’s like taken to grooming his facial hair or he’s cleaning up his eyebrows, making sure his nails are clean, he’s stepped up his cologne game 🫠🫠

he just appreciates how much work reader puts into her appearance and finds her so beautiful, he wants to be up to her standards and feel like he’s worthy of being with her 🥺🥺

YES ABSOLUTELY!!

Simon was never one to worry much about his appearance, just wearing military-issued clothes and other random things he bought when he wasn't deployed. It's mentioned that he also didn't even know what skincare was before meeting her and this man used to wash his face with only water or body wash 😭 but once she starts getting him introduced to all those things and she starts doing his skincare?? Simon Riley, the man that you are.

He's seen you spend over an hour doing your skincare and always making sure your presentation looks good before going out, spending a lot of time doing your makeup, hair, nails and planning outfits, and he starts truly believing that he has to look good for you as well.

He starts to trim his nails more and clean them up well, sometimes even asking you for help or accepting to go get a manicure with you so the callouses in his hands get better and he can have soft hands to hold and touch you. He'd never admit it, but he spent a long time at different stores trying to pick a body wash and cologne that smells pleasant so he can always smell nice when he's out with you.

He starts to shave his face more often, using an aftershave with a pleasant, masculine smell. He tries his best to shower before coming back home to you, and if he's not able to, the first thing he does is suggest that you both take a shower together, secretly proud to see your surprised face at how many things he uses now to clean his body compared to the tiny bar of cheap soap that he used when you first met.

Sure, his muscles make him a more intimidating figure in the battlefield and help him be at the top, but he's never felt more grateful for them than when you're tying a bow on his arm and making him flex just to see it unwrap. He absolutely loves how you worship his body and having your long, pretty nails run over his muscles when you touch him, squeezing his muscles and drooling over them and how cool he looks.

He wants to keep up with you— you're a very pretty girl who puts a lot of effort into your appearance, and he wants to do the same, wanting to look worthy of being with you even when in your eyes, he was fully worthy of it even before he changed.

I also believe that bimbo!reader had the idea to plan his Senpai Ghost outfit HBJEFJHFEHJBFE

Bimbo!Reader Masterlist

[ratatoast]

Son coeur est le tien

Alastor x Reader qpr (general headcanons)

a/n: halfway through writing this, i realised that maybe my idea of a qpr might be different than someone else's haha,,, also, this is the very first time I've written for hazbin hotel lol (and should i mention that english isn't my first language? haha)

that being said, i hope y'all enjoy this mess :P

also also if y'all would like me to continue writing Alastor qpr (cuz there's def a shortage on that), feel free to send me prompts :)) i obvi wont write nsfw, but other than that, i think anything is fine (?)

Being in a qpr with the radio demon would include…

Long talks over tea/coffee

There’s never any awkward silence between the two of you. You two could be chatting about the most mundane things, and the conversation would still flow perfectly.

He’d definitely learn exactly how you like your hot beverage.

I personally can’t imagine him being an avid coffee drinker tbh, but I don’t think he’d mind if you are one.

Takes your tea parties very seriously, knows all your favourite pastries, puts on some smooth jazz, brings out the fine china, etc

Loves listening to you talking about your day, your current interests, hobbies, etc. Even if the topic itself isn’t all that interesting to him, he’ll still listen to you.

The both of you love gossiping with each other. Neither of you will admit it to others though.

Petnames

You very rarely hear your given name come out of this man’s mouth.

He never calls you anything that he deems too sickly sweet, usually sticks to dear, sweetheart, or darling.

If he’s having a particularly great day, he might call you love, but that doesn’t happen very often.

Constant praises & words of affirmation

I think words of affirmation is one of his main love languages.

He constantly showers you with praises, telling you how gorgeous you look, how witty your jokes are, etc.

We all know that this man is a charmer, however his compliments to you are more than just empty words… most of the time :p

Do keep in mind that this man is a master manipulator tho, so he isn't above using sweet talk to get what he wants.

Playful banter that keeps you on your toes

He loves a good back and forth, especially if his darling is a particularly witty individual.

The two of you can turn any conversation into a battle of words.

However, if you take it too far, he’s not afraid to put you in your place with a couple of sharp words, aimed to hurt.

But most of the time it’s just good fun :)

Never having to so much as lift a finger

He’s very big on acts of service.

Forget about opening doors or pulling out chairs for yourself.

He takes being a gentleman very seriously, especially when it comes to you.

But not only is he a gentleman, he’s also a powerful overlord.

So if you ever need anything, be that a new pair of shoes, or getting rid of a particularly nasty demon, consider it done.

Being his closest confidant

We all know that Alastor has many acquaintances, however he falls short on meaningful connections.

He doesn’t let people get too close to him, and it is sort of understandable why.

You are one of the only exceptions to that.

You know more about this man than all of hell combined.

It took a while for him to open up to you, and even longer until he started telling you about his past.

He’s the kind to drop hints about himself and let you figure out the rest.

Trust goes a long way with him, I think he’d be more open to sharing his plans and such with someone that he knows won’t question his every move.

Even so, there’s still a lot that you don’t know about him, but you’ll just have to take what you can.

You can dress however you want… as long as it fits his taste

He’s not all too picky about what you wear.

Contrary to popular belief, he wouldn’t expect you to be in full glam 24/7.

If you like more revealing clothes, well, he’ll just have to make sure that anyone that dares to as much as look at you the wrong way is taken care of.

That being said, looking well put together is a must.

You represent him in a way, and he expects you to look the part.

He can’t have you wandering the streets of hell in rags that not even the lowest sinners would wear.

Absolutely no modern technology allowed

Do I even need to explain this?

He’d rather be safe than sorry when it comes to the possibility of Vox messing with you.

You are never truly alone

Alastor would make sure to accompany you on your outings as much as his schedule allows it.

But let’s be real, he’s a very busy man.

He makes sure that a few of his shadows keep an eye on you though, even in his absence.

I don’t think your personal strength matters in this case, as I’ve mentioned before, there’s very little that this man wouldn’t do for you, especially when it comes to your personal safety.

Lets you get closer to him than anyone else

This time, I’m talking about physical closeness.

We all know that he isn’t big on physical touch.

However, I feel like you could get away with a lot more than others.

When the two of you are walking somewhere, it’s not unusual for him to offer you his arm.

When you’re standing next to him, he sometimes rests his hand on your back, although that is often a subconscious thing.

If you’re having a particularly rough day, he isn’t too opposed to letting you hug him.

You can also get away with laying on his lap sometimes, and if he’s feeling exceptionally gracious, he might even pet your hair.

PDA is definitely a big no-no, on one hand he has an image to protect, but I also just don’t think he’d be too comfortable with showing his more vulnerable side in public.

As for kisses… if you haven’t seen each other in a while, he might greet you with a kiss on your hand, but that’s as far as it ever goes.

He’s not a very touchy-feely person, so if that bothers you… good luck finding someone better than the radio demon ;)

me af tbh lmao

anway, thanks for reading pookies mwah (slash platonic lol)

[bucknastysbabe]

imagine how insufferable criston would be if his so was pregnant. she cant do anything. and he would be like maybe we should get married and she would be like why??? and he would be like we are having a baby and she would be like i dont think we should get married just bc we are having a baby??? and he would cry for a week. i like when pretty men suffer

On god he would be so annoying but also I’m just having thots about it and they’ve been multiplying in my head like bacteria. ✨Pretty men suffering✨

First of all he’s even more possessive bc not only you’re his but you’re carrying his baby

Like gotdamn can’t even walk down the street without Criston putting his arm around you or having a hand on the small of your back and could HE STOP KISSING YOUR CHEEK WE GET IT

So then comes the whining about getting married. He simply doesn’t get coexisting without a ring and you taking his last name. Criston def gets teary when you’re like no???? Like y’all already live together, sleep in the same bed, and you’re literally having criss priss baby

“I don’t understand, don’t you want a big ring, a dress? We never got a honeymoon.” You have to remind him that honeymoon ain’t happening when there’s a baby to be taken care of!!

He’s def audibly sighing and huffing when he’s denied, again. Probably sobs in the shower bc the delusions are being CRUSHED

You think he’s kinda cute with red eyes and nose, his lips swollen. So Criston can get a pity blowie but first he has to be a mother hen and make sure you have a pillow on your knees and are comfy. He’s adorable when he whines and trembles from your mouth.

Sometimes you have to slap him a little when he’s following you around the house just MaKiNg SuRe you’re okay. Literally you just want a bagel.

As you move along in the pregnancy babes gets A Little Feral. I lied he’s insatiable. The man loves your curves and baby weight, not to mention how big your tits are getting. God forbid you’re just standing around doing something because if Criston is around he’s coming up from behind, making a comment about how pretty you are all bred up with his baby.

That also means constant groping— he can’t keep his hands off of you. Especially when Criston’s fucking you on all fours, hand possessively splayed across your rounded belly. He’s practically growling, “Look so fucking good for me, bred you up good didn’t I? When you pop out our baby m’gonna put a ring on your finger and fuck another one in you.” Which you cum quite dramatically at that, his sheer desperation is hot, and his cock is nice. Criston’s a sexy man. Delusional, but sexy.

The marriage talk is brought up again…post-coital bliss? Not in that house. Criston’s pouting, face shoved into your tits. He grumbles, “You’ll get it sooner or later. I’m going to marry you.”

“Yep baby, alright.” *cue more shower crying*

Also he’s ecstatic whether it’s a boy or girl like he’s just happy to be daddy cole🥰

Oh god when your milk comes in Criston is your personal fucking pump. He doesn’t think it’s funny when you ask him if he really likes milking cows this much. Your man is dead serious, “You’re not a cow. You’re perfect and pregnant and a goddess.” Okay go off king

But fr the fucking ramps up to a 10 in the third trimester that man is HORNY!!!!! He got in some trouble with you just mindlessly grabbing your ass at the grocery store. Dumbass had to walk around with a boner in the Walmart baby section

The day you go into labor he’s in full action mode. A true king. Look at him in he scrubs. He’s probably ugly sobbing when you’re holding the babe for the first time. It’s okay though you’re ugly sobbing too. Then the baby is ugly sobbing. Happily ever after😌

No you’re still not marrying his dumbass either

[slickchickchocolatier]

hey reinaa this req is def something 🫣🫣

so like heethan and reader like live together and reader isnt feeling well, and she slept in like a skimpy nightdress so her tits and ass are out (idek how to start it) anyways heethans cooking her breakfast like eggs or something and cvms in it 😭😭 then hes like feeding it to her while stroking her head n shit and asking her if she likes it, and shes like yes (obviously) and is completely oblivious to it then smut or whatever

thank uu if u do this

”Tell me…how does it taste?”

warnings: so if you read the prompt…yeah, consumption of bodily fluids in not such a traditional manner lol. But it’s quite juicy. Implications of rough smut, smut described in subtle detail, unprotected sex (implied) and yeah…think that’s it. ;)

Stretching out the aches from last night’s session, the opening between your thighs sting with a sense of looseness throbbing mercilessly. A reminder of what your beloved fiancé had put you through, all for the sake of pleasure, pain, and love. Hard love. 

…………….

“Look at me. I said look…”

“Mmmmm…..nnnnngh!”

“That’s right…shhh….take it like I showed you…like how I trained you to.”

“Mmmm….mmmmph!!”

“Watch me…watch me….fuck….going deeper….”

……………

The vague images of Heeseung and Ethan swapping out, taking turns as they stuck their thumb in your mouth, while the remainder of their digits hooked your chin as they forced you to look their way, were all like still images in a memory drive. Heeseung pulled, thrusted, and swallowed your moans with his kisses while Ethan pushed, pumped, and slurped the drool from your mouth. You squabble aimlessly, putting forth whatever strength you had to get just the tiniest bit of distance, all to ease up the tension of his throbbing cock as he made himself fit; filling you entirely. 

You wondered for a moment, as your warm feet touch the flooring—cooled by the brisk morning temperature of near freezing, would it even be possible for you to be considered an exceptional candidate for a partner and wife, if something has happened to Heeseung and he was no longer around? Not that that wouldn’t happen, you knew that your thoughts were strictly hypothetical, yet it was a valid thought. Because the man had taken you so many times since the beginning, and has delightfully feasted and punctured your flesh, to the point that despite never experiencing pregnancy or childbirth, not yet, you wondered if your womanhood was beyond dignified. Heeseung was a stallion of all sorts, his momentum, size, and pace was unmatchable, and there was no way that any man wouldn’t be able to tell that you had been ravished. Good thing that Heeseung, and Ethan, has both claimed you for life—and that no matter how many times you both engage in the heat of sexual passion, they remarked how it always felt as good as the first time, why wouldn't they? With all that length and girth, they barely fit and required you to be extra moist in order for them to punch it in. This all further convinced you tha if ever you were without them, surely you’d be doomed to remain single forever. 

Heeseung wasn’t in bed, you sat over the edge, taking your time to adjust your body and to get ready. Still nude, you figured you should start the day off with a warm shower, but suddenly, the door opens, and there he was. 

“Hey, good morning pretty. Did you sleep okay?”

“Yes. You?” You chuckle, when he was rough and hard with his love, he was intense and passionate, sexy and dominating. Yet when he was calm and all honey, he was sweet and the love was a different type than the one he eludes at night. It was a soft, delicate love, one that was admiring and caring. 

“Good. I made you breakfast.”

You looked at him somewhat wide eyed, Heeseung, much less his Ethan side, never dabbled into the art of cuisine creation. They admitted openly and yet, here they were, with Heeseung’s dashing smirk and Ethan’s dark gaze, they split the shred body 50/50 as they presented you a plate of messily scrambled eggs, semi-burnt toast—with jelly sloppily drooling over the edge of the crust, and a small glass of freshly squeezed orange juice, with pulp staining the rim of the glass. You smiled, even though the plate had a humorous display, you knew he did his best. 

“Oh my gosh, you cooked for me?” You smiled gleefully as you looked up, to which the man before you nodded in silence and even had a faint of bashful sense in his countenance. “I tried.” He calmly states, clearing his throat as his deep voice spoke modestly in response to your grateful reaction. 

“Baaaaabe, thank you! I’m going to eat ever last bite.”

“I hoped you would.” His words were sharp, deep, and somewhat quiet as he pressed out the response under a breath. You didn’t catch it. 

“What was that babe?” 

“Oh nothing. Just talking to myself. Let me know how it tastes.”

You took a bite of the eggs, and tossed the fluffed texture around as you savored the taste. “You seasoned the eggs?” You chuckled as you rolled your tongue, taking in the semi-pungent saltiness as you swallowed. He smiles as his eyes widen with an expressive sense of delight. 

“I did, do you like it?”

“I do.” You nodded politely. It was a bit saltier than what you preferred but it was the first time the man has ever stepped foot in the kitchen to cook, you weren’t going to discourage him, besides…a little salt does good for the body. 

He takes a seat next to you, takes the fork from you hands and places his free palm on the back of your head. Initially you looked at him curiously, but the moment you witnessed him sternly looking at the plate, forking a cluster of eggs, and bringing it to your face, you smiled adorably as you opened to take in the bite. He smirks and chuckles, placing a kiss on your cheek as he continues to feed you every last morsel. “Does my baby like it?”

You nod. “Mmhmm.”

“Good girl.”

…………….

Earlier…

He woke up before the sun has a chance to kiss the moon to sleep. Prior to getting out of bed, he looks down and admires his sleeping beauty. “Damn she’s pretty…” he whispers to himself. How lucky is he to have you? Well, the truth was, he wasn’t lucky, just smart. Smart enough to know that he had to get you, from the very first moment he laid eyes on you, and he planned, lied, and deceived in order to accomplish his goal….he got you. 

His member begins to harden at the sight of you, and as much as he was tempted to get at you again, he knew that after last night, he has to give you some time to catch up on your rest. You’re such a trooper, always taking him and his Ethan side without complaint, pleasing them as you took one after the other, allowing them to take turns as they pumped you up with every bit of juice they had to give. Yes, you’re such a good girl. A good, and pretty little girl. 

Always the one to show his dying love for you, Heeseung heads into the kitchen. He didn’t know what item from which in order to cook, thank goodness for YouTube. 

With the toaster ticking, and the eggs sizzling in butter, he plays around the yolk and whites, zoning out as the image of your face from last night makes him grow. You always looked so helpless, whenever he’s fucking you, and God….does he love it. 

With his thoughts triggered, an idea pops in mind. You were his…you belong to him. Even if you had wanted to leave, he knew that that was not how you truly felt, you both are in love and he claimed you the moment he laid eyes on you. You will always be under his thumb, his beautiful flower, his delicate princess…only his. 

Since he’s claimed you in more ways than one, why not expand it and introduce another manner in ‘claiming’ you? 

Grabbing onto the base, with the image of your teary face bumping up and down as he thrusted into you repeatedly the night prior, he strokes his member. God…he was so close to shutting everything off, rushing up the stairs so he could fuck you in your sleep. He was tempted, but he maintained some sense of control as he continued to stroke and thrust his palm, going faster and faster as he groans until finally… 

“Fuuuuuuuck…!” He whispers under a harsh breath, chest deeply heaving as his nostrils flare. He leans over, palm gripping the edge of the counter as he catches his breath, gasping for air. Decorating the eggs, he unleashes every last bit of what he could draft up since last night, and felt satisfied at the result. Stirring the eggs, he turns off the stove and slides it all on a plate. Adding the other ingredients, he organizes the breakfast tray and brings it up. He’ll be so happy to see you take him in, in a way that you’re not used to taking him, but it’s just as good. Besides…

“You know pretty baby, a little salt does good for the body.”

Perm Taglist:

@enheene , aiden2001 , heeseung-min , lathan1510 , rayofsunshineeee , @hoyeonheeseung , @rayofsunshineeee , @yohanabanana , @sunoosrightbuttcheek , @jaeneohee , @icydawon , @silcry , @iamliacamila , @nikstrange , @enheene ; @nuriicata

[anoncelebz]

Matt Sturniolo NSFW !Alphabet

WARNINGS : !!explicit content below; do not read if it makes you uncomfortable!!

AUTHORS NOTE : I didn’t exactly follow the template for this, I made some of it up from my imagination.

—This is my first time publishing any type of writing; please comment & let me know what you think… be honest!—

A = aftercare

King of aftercare. Literally would do anything to make you feel comfortable & taken care of. Would fill up your water bottle, get you a towel, maybe even run you a hot bath to relax in if it was really rough, ofc followed with lots of cuddles

B = body part (His favourite of yours)

He looooooves your tits. It isn’t rare to catch him staring at them mid conversation & need to redirect his attention.

“My eyes are up here”

“Heyyyy how can u blame me when your wearing a shirt like that”

C = cum (anything to do with cum)

Lowkey he loves cumming inside of you. It makes him feel closer to you & he kind of loves the risk of it. He also loves covering your face in it.

D = Degrading (does he like it ?)

Matt isnt the biggest fan of degrading. He finds it disrespectful to talk/treat you like that even if its just in a sexual way. The most he will do is call you a slut, slap you, or spit in your mouth.

E = Experience(how experienced was he before you met)

At the time that you guys met he had 2-3 bodies. He knew how to please you but was not opposed to taking notes on how to get better (and he did).

F = Favourite position(his favorite)

He’s def a missionary guy. He loves looking into your eyes and kissing your face as he fucks you, & ofc grabbing + sucking on your tits is easier when they are right in front of his face.

G = Goofy (how serious/goofy is he in the moment)

He is very focused on pleasuring you so he is serious most of the time but, once you guys were together for a while and had gotten a lot more comfortable with eachother you were able to laugh more and have a little more fun.

H = Hair (how groomed is he)

Trimmed not shaven. Not too much but not too little.

I = Intimacy (how intimate is he)

He loves making love & being intimate with you. It’s his way of showing you how much he loves you. He loves showering you with praise & kisses

J = Jack off (how often does he do it)

He only ever does it when he’s not with you; like when he’s home in Boston, on tour, or travelling without you. But anytime you are together he will make sure to find time to fuck you instead of jacking off.

K = Kinks (which ones does he have)

He doesn’t have any crazy kinks. He likes putting you in handcuffs sometimes so he has more control over you, he will slap your ass & face and he sometimes likes to spit in your mouth.

L = Location (where does he like to do it)

Call him boring but, he def loves doing it in bed. Sure doing it in public is fun but theres nothing better than being able to be loud & comfortable at home.

M = Motivation (what turns him on)

In his eyes you’re the sexiest person he’s ever seen so most things you do can turn him on; specifically when you kiss his neck + nibble on his ear, or when you sneak your hand up his shirt and rub his stomach/ v-line.

N = No (something he wont do)

He would not do anything seriously degrading to you; anything that would cause more pain than pleasure.

Oral (giving & receiving)

Matt. The. Munch. This man will eat you all day until you cant take it anymore. He loves to be down there until you’re squirming & pulling his hair. He obviously loves when you go down on him. He loves to look you in the eye, hold & caress your face and tell you how good you’re doing.

P = Pace (how fast/slow does he go)

It definitely depends on the mood. If he is wanting to make love & show how much he loves you he will go very slow & gentle. If you guys are just fucking for pleasure + fun he def speeds up his pace and will be very fast & rough.

Q = Quickie (his opinion on quickies)

I mean let’s be honest if a quickie is all you guys can do he’s def down for one but its not something he always loves to do. He likes to take his time pleasuring you without a time limit.

R = Risky (how risky does he like to be)

He likes to stay in his comfort zone but if you really wanted to try something new/something risky he would at least try it once for you to see how he likes it + to make you happy.

S = Stamina (how long does he last/how many rounds)

After a bit of practice he was able to build up his stamina and can last 2-3 rounds (on a good day)

T = Toys (does he like them)

The only toys he would use during sex if he used any it would be a vibrator on you, but for the most part he likes to be the one that makes you feel good.

V = Volume (how loud is he)

He isn’t that loud but definitely isn’t awkwardly quiet. He softly moans/grunts when you feel good, or will do some dirty talk to get you going even more.

W = Wild card (random head cannon)

I feel like he is such a big tease. Especially if he knows you wont have the chance to do it all day. He would whisper dirty things in your ear, compliment you, send you dirty texts, and put his hand as far up your thigh as he can.

X = X ray (whats going on under those clothes)

I honestly feel like he’s around average. Maybe like 6-7 inches.

Y = Yearning (how often does he want to have sex)

For the most part he likes to have sex 4ish times a week, sometimes more sometimes less. If you guys haven’t seen each other in a while then he def likes to have it a little more than average. Its also hard to do it sometimes because you guys are always around his brothers.

Z = Zzz (how quick after does he sleep)

Sex definitely makes him sleepy so he’s usually passed out within 20-30 minutes of finishing. He always makes sure to provide aftercare for you and make sure you’re ready for sleep as well.

[rodolfoparras]

What if you threw in a little bit of breeding and maybe some piss into the puppy Soap idea?

Now imo, the reader in this a little bit of a subtop in this situationship. I can imagine after a long day of teasing Soap, he is dragging the reader to the nearest spot to fuck. Maybe it’s the shitty couch in the break room no one uses anymore since the base was renovated. Soap is just shoving you down onto the couch, already nipping at your neck and tugging at your pants.

Anyways skip the foreplay and straight into the sex. Basically Soap is bouncing on your dick like his life depends on it. You make some snide comment about him being horny like “a mutt in heat”, and he takes that to heart. He steps up his game, basically being like “I’ll show you a mutt in heat”, and just absolutely wrecks you. Like I’m talking multiple orgasms and no breaks while he is somehow only on number 2. He’s teasing, calling you the “real mutt” since you keep cumming like you’re trying to breed him.

After awhile, you’re shooting blanks but he still needs to prove you wrong. He says he isn’t stopping till he cums again, but you feel the pressure in your bladder grow more and more. You try to tell him and just says, “only a mutt would piss on themselves.” And now it’s a game for Soap. Which will break first: your bladder or his mental fortitude?

Lil goofy rant that includes like 3 of my favorite kinks (piss, overstim, and breeding)

-🤠

*grabs mic*

This is def taken from @/lieutnt but imagine jealous soap who literally acts like a puppy around you clinging onto you, calling for you when you spend too much time talking to the other recruits, going out his way to join you on every mission now we all know how territorial dogs can get so what if a recruit seems to have taken extra much liking to you and no matter what approach he tries he can’t seem to get to you, you have to be with the recruit for the day have to show them around on base have to spend excessive amount of time with them he literally sits in the common area sulking like a puppy

Maybe something happens the recruit wants to hang out with you outside of base maybe the recruit is wearing your shirt or something or maybe he’s straight up ogling you in front of soap

So as soon as he can soaps gets the two of you alone so eager he shoves you into the shower stalls, luckily they’re empty but it’s not secluded anyone can stumble inside he strips the clothes off of you before he drops to his knees sucks you off until you can’t breathe until you’re on the verge of pissing yourself but no matter how much you shove his head away he doesn’t stop bobbing his head and before you know of it you’re pissing in his mouth, watching the way it trickles down his chin and throat mingling with the water from the shower head and he looks proud as ever especially when he hears the shocked gasp from the recruit who was just about to head for a shower

[theloveinc]

bf deku who's a little creepy with his love for u..

in a good way ... or a bad way?👁️👁️

Anywayyyyyy yeah. Yeah. You think it's just the honeymoon stage at first, cuz I mean, you feel the same and think it's all very sweet... but suddenly it's your year and six month anniversary and you realize none of his """"wacky"""" behavior has ever really stopped or changed.

But it is... cute? Sweet, at least, the way he's a lil overbearing about things. Always trying to feed you, whether at home or out in public... little bits of his lunch he breaks off to give you when you're sitting on his lap, to watch you eat and make sure you smile about.

(Or the ones he comes into the room just to give you, like he was specifically thinking about you when he ordered a bento at the cafe, spoon in hand loaded with all your favorite things. you glare, cheekily, cuz you always tell him to order what HE wants, but no, never. he'd rather split everything with you than have anything of his own, and if he had his way, he always would.)

Even shower time, cuz if he's not in the water with you (big hands always peeling the soap and loofa and shampoo out of your grasp so he can wash you for you, big hands doing other things to your body that you enjoy but definitely do not include what you're supposed to be doing)... he's sitting on the toilet right next to you, playing on his phone while he waits for you to get out, OR even sitting against the door outside, after jiggling the handle and whining about you not letting him in.

(i saw a funny tik tok that was like, "whenever they say they're showering" and it was the guy running across the house naked LMFAO to get in with her... that's deku.)

And when you get mad at him, lock him out of the bedroom cuz he won't stop weeping and apologizing... he'll lay down on the floor outside and stick his fingers underneath the door to wiggle them at you, his nose too, like it will make you less angry, like he couldn't just bust the whole thing down if he REALLY wanted to (which he doesn't really, not unless you were in danger, not including the time you accidentally locked him out and he came home from patrol so exhausted that he popped the knob right off it's handle accidentally slamming it into the wall trying to get into bed with you).

LOOOOL and you go to his agency one day for some reason (he always wants to see you, his favorite days are when you visit for any reason), and while he's packing up to take a break with you, his computer backgrounds and screensavers are literally all just pictures of you. literally. every single one you've ever taken practically, even the gag photos you send your friends, with your hair all done for bed and face shiny from moisturizer...

It's almost like he snuck onto your phone once or twice to download everything onto his... which like. hmmmmmmmm. LOL. okay. Not to mention the fact that he has locations on and texts you whenever you go ANYWHERE. Even to the konbini across the street. Like he's constantly looking.

Bakugo def adores u for keeping deku out of his hair, but lowkey also has a little beef with you, too, for being practically the only other thing he talks about aside from work and business lksdfjadksljf.

and tbh? i'd feel bad for him, too.

[icyfox17]

Okay here's the first irondad snipp I ever wrote (there is def some Tommy vibes since that was all I'd written before this BUT they are like the same person anyway so--)

"I think you should really reconsider your choices of joining a gang, and think of maybe joining a bathing club or something. Those exist right?"

The man doesn't even acknowledge Peter's attempt at a joke, instead swinging at him with another punch, that Peter easily dodges. His gun had been taken by Peter awhile ago, and his stamina was quite frankly depressing. He was panting hard, which meant Peter had to breathe in the stench of his breath, on top of the terrible body odor.

"Ugh, scratch that. You do know what a toothbrush is right? More than 80% of dentists reccomend Colgate. Maybe try that brand."

"I'm gonna," the man heaves, hands on his knees as he catches his breath, and okay this is getting a little sad, "rip your tongue out and feed it to my dog, so I can never hear you talk again."

"Yikesss, that's not nice for your dog. What kinda dog wants to eat human tongue?? Feels bad for your dog."

This time the man opts to scream as a response and charges Peter, who is honestly done with this at this point, so instead of dodging, he shoots him with his web and wraps the man up in it like a cocoon. He also takes care to web up his mouth because man, no one deserves to smell that breath.

Peter looks to the sky, and much to his dismay, it is still day. There isn't even the beginnings of orange tinging the sky to signify sunset, and man today is going to be a long day.

He guesses he could go and try to see what Ned is up to, but Peter's pretty sure he's working on a really important project, and he doesn't want to bother him with it.

Peter sighs heavily. "Karen, I don't know what to do."

The ai responds to him rather quite promptly, "You could always head back to the tower. I'm sure Mr. Stark would pause whatever he was doing to see you, if you wanted him to."

And yeah. That's what Peter normally does, when he's having a slow day. Today though, he's trying to avoid it, considering the fact that he shouldn't be patrolling at all, and he's sure that Mr. Stark would be onto him the minute he saw him. Peter isn't sure how he always seems to know. One time he even took a shower before going to see him, and he still knew. It was probably Karen's fault, though he made her swear not to tell him.

"I know Karen. It's just..." He trails off with a sigh, shooting a web and pulling himself up. He starts to swing through the city aimlessly, still unsure of where to go, but wanting to move away from the crime.

"I'm sure Mr. Stark would be happier to see you than not, even if you have done something against his wishes."

Peter cringes. "You didn't have to phrase it like that Karen."

"How else would I phrase it?"

"I dunno, just not that."

There's silence for a bit as Peter fights with himself. On the one hand, he really does want to see Mr. Stark. He hasn't seen him since right after the accident, and he quite frankly misses hanging out with him. On the other hand, he really does not want to hear a lecture about how he shouldn't be patrolling so soon after his injury.

Ring Ring Ring

Incoming Call From: Tony Stark

Uh oh.

Guess he doesn't have a say in the matter anyway.

"Uh, hi Mr. Stark!" answers Peter as cheerfully as he can, trying to find a decent roof to land on.

"Hey Pete, I was wondering if you--" Mr. Stark cuts himself off. "Is that wind I hear?"

"Uh yeah, it's just super windy where I am right now," Peter says, chuckling nervously. "It's honestly crazy how windy it is. There are definitely going to be some fallen trees tomorrow."

Mr. Stark is silent for a moment before, "You wouldn't... happen to be patrolling right now, would you?"

"Whaaaaat? Noooo," Peter winces as he hears a car blast it's horn, "that would be entirely irresponsible of me. I would never."

"You know I can look at your suit's cameras and see what you're seeing right now, right?"

"Obviously, but you're not because you trust me full heartedly and--"

"Peter."

Peter sighs. "Okay, so maybe I went on a five minute patrol. But it's super dead today! I was literally about to head to your place because of how bored I was. You can ask Karen!"

"That doesn't matter Pete. What matters is you just came out of a serious fight with several injuries. You shouldn't be throwing yourself back out there!"

"I know Mr. Stark."

"We agreed on two weeks. Two weeks! You know most people would need a whole month, but Pepper and Happy reminded me about your enhanced healing, and I said fine. Fine! Two weeks. And how long has it been?"

"...A week."

"A week! You know, I was going to call you and ask if you wanted to go to Ben and Jerry's with me, but now--"

"No, Mr. Stark please! I won't go again for the next week, I promise."

"And how good was your promise this time?"

"I double promise. Triple promise! C'mon Mr. Stark, please? I really wanted to see you today."

"Kid, you can still come over," he says, sounding a bit appalled at the idea that Peter couldn't. "You can always come over. You know that by now."

"...but can we get ice-cream?"

Peter tries his best to give puppy eyes, even though he's unsure if Mr. Stark could even see him.

He hears Mr. Stark mumble some vague curses before, "Alright fine. But if you do this again, I swear to God--"

"I won't, I won't!"

"Okay, now get your butt over here."

Peter giggles a bit. "Okay. Bye Mr. Stark!"

"Bye kid."

There's a beep to signal the call ending, and Peter makes sure to swing by his backpack on the way to the tower.

All the while, Karen is strangely quiet but Peter has a sense she's feeling downright smug.

Peter ignores it though, in favour of focusing on his excitement for ice-cream.

[quinloki]

oh yeah no I've def read him & him & him and I kind of thought of it but I wasn't sure if you would have read it

I think that dynamic would work without having to figure out how to broach the like, pseudo-incest with what is essentially step/adopted siblings of them doing anything with eachother lmao they just share the girly they like bc they're both mature (and maybe recreate the shower scene I meannnnnnn… >>) and they're both SOOOO busy with their jobs and stuff and this way you're always taken care of

they def would be sly towards eachother sometimes tho it'd be hilarous

AND YES TWO AGAINST ONE YOURE PROLLY NEVER WINNING EVER BC THOSE FUCKERS ARE SO SMART

I also think pops would really like reader bc reader 'loves' ace (obvi platonic, brotherly love) and ace realizes and FEELS loved and that's something he doesn't get a lot of course pops is gonna favor someone who makes his boy feel loved (smol creature HAHAHAHA ITS LIKE A PET)

god I can just imagine a like competition in both boys heads about who can fluster you the most and you're like obvi so so so spoiled bc I think of them both as very attentive and buy you all the stuffs even tho you're like omg STOP

you're also spoiled by the fucking other brothers cause they think you're cute as a button and if there was any flirting from other brothers I think it'd be funny cause ace would be like….. dude I don't see the appeal and meanwhile you're oblivious to it

I saw you replied to this and I had to make sure I was fully awake before reading bc I knew it was gonna make my brain go brrr and it did if you write this I'll die in the best way you might even get me squealing at work seeing a chapter update (I am very subtle but it happens with birds of a feather sometimes xD)

my brain is all over the place rn but AHHHH fuck Sabo just snuck up on me goddamn this is very much like what happened with marco I just casually was like oh okay I like him and then it spiraled and then you started posting about him and I was like !!!! okay in my brain hardcore then thanks

Sorry to throw more in your brain <3 (I'm not HAHAH even your replies are killing me with the thoughts)

Yeah, I feel like I could dip my toes in a little. Marco and Ace are adopted brothers, and Sabo is Ace's honorary brother with Luffy, and Sabo and Luffy live with the other boys, and they're not like, outsiders, but the vibes/connection between Sabo and Marco isn't really brotherly.

Sabo's a little too independent and I feel like he has weird feelings about Siblings because of Stuffy, or Sterry or whatever the heck that guy's name is.

Sabo and Marco are both pretty open minded on top of it, so they're not likely to get physical with one another without the reader there, but they're not against adding to whatever pleasure is happening, even if it means interacting with one another. Not that it happens often, but I imagine the first time those two share a kiss the reader nearly dies from how hot it is. >.> ("awww, our little bird is all flustered about for being left out." and then you're just drown in kisses against your neck and lips and such.)

I feel like Sabo calls you his little dove, or songbird, and Marco calls you pretty bird, and they'll refer to you as their little bird or sweet dove when it's relating you to both of them.

There's gonna be at LEAST one time where the Reader gets a leg up on Marco and Sabo - and probably only because Thatch, Izou and Ace help her set everything up. XD Some kind of surprise or something and they both come home at the same time and are just agog by it and it's her victory until they pick their jaws up off the floor and turn the tables XD

Similar as they are, Sabo's a little meaner behind closed doors, enjoying teasing and overstimming and edging and please do cry oh so sweetly for him, but just for him, no one else is allowed to make you cry.

Marco's a little sweeter, he loves to hear you sing for him, struggling in whatever binds or sensory deprivations he's got going.

The two of them together are overwhelming, which is a reason why most of your forays with either are 1:1 and not 2:1.

One of the first real issues between the three of them is Shanks, who is just as sweet on you as he is on Marco, and that first little pang of jealously when he starts wooing Marco that the reader feels is the first "oh, I'm jealous." A little self-doubt like maybe you shouldn't try to get near Marco cause Shanks is closer to his age, and gorgeous (and maybe you shouldn't get near Sabo cause Koala is closer in age, and gorgeous)

>.>

[queerspaceprince]

super long post

i saw the tv glow spoilers, me being depressing, tw's in tags

i went to see I Saw the TV Glow this afternoon. i got it. def cried a little (idk if hrt has stopped me from crying more bc i havent cried since i was in hs anyway) my sib got it, tho we havent talked ab it yet bc im still processing even now. my mom did not get any of it. at all. wasnt affected. thats fine, whatever.

and. jesus. i give the movie a 15/10, but it was. a whole lot. i have too many emotions.

Im def gonna mention a few spoilers so if you dont want to be spoiled, is your warning.

it made me feel too much. is the allegory really allegory if the hidden meaning is right at the surface?

when owen says that thing during their convo on the bleachers -i cant remember the exact words fuck- something about feeling hollow or missing something or whatever, how he thinks something is wrong with him and his parents do to-i feel that. so much. i felt it so much more before my egg cracked, but i still feel it in relation to my depression and anxiety. that hit me.

there was also that part about feeling like you're watching yourself from the outside, as if through a tv. oof.

then the whole thing maddie said about how time didnt feel right, how nothing changed when she left. i get it. I was 10 nd my parents got divorced, and suddenly im 11 and thinking i wanted to d1e for the first time, and then im 14 in a kind of manipulative relationship, with like 1 friend and super depressed, and then i was graduating and realizing im queer and exploring my gender and going through a breakup. then im 20, and getting my first job, and coming out to my family. and now im 26. and i still mostly feel the same way i always have. i have more good days, and im more confident now, but i still feel like im just going through the motions a lot of the time.

when did I stop being a kid? ive been an adult for 8 years and Im still only working part time (32 hrs), still living with my mother bc rent is $$$$, still barely functional enough that I havent cleaned my room since last year and ive only showered 3 times in the past week, and i have to force myself to go get coffee on my days off or else ill stay in bed all day. Im just stuck here. i shouldve taken driving lessons when I could. id be out. except i cant leave my sibling behind with my mother. shes not awful, but them being alone is an explosion waiting to happen. but they dont have a job and i doubt i could support both of us. and now i dont trust my eyes enough, like i read for 15 minutes and everything else goes blurry, like im seeing triple.

anyway. next is the scene in where she talks about k1lling herself to get back to the pink opaque world. I. have to admit i nearly threw up. the imagery, the way she spoke about it. she said she regretted it while she was stuck underground, then how she felt good about it, about getting out....ive been sitting in a low spot for a while, it was better while we were on our trip, but it just reverted when we came back. i keep thinking im going to relapse into sh again. i feel so close to the edge sometimes. and theres really no reason for it either. my life is fine. not great, not perfect. but adequate. anyway i had to close my eyes and take a minute after that.

i feel that even without wanting to go back to the other world, maddie was suicidal. she wouldve found some reasoning to k1ll herself. Now ive only ever been actively su1cidal once, when i was 15 -or 16- idk my teen years are all a blur of depression and anxiety. im good now. well. i say good. im more, self destructive then really wanting to d1e. just. i feel so bad on the inside for no reason, why can i have a reason to hurt on the outside?? anyway, im ok now, im 3.5 years clean, i dont want that to change. im working on my coping mechanisms.

there was another quote from that planetarium scene that i couldnt stop thinking about but has now vanished from my mind entirely. bc sometimes getting my thoughts in order is like. catching smoke.

anyway. then everything after that. him growing old. knowing something about him is different but not wanting to acknowledge it or it would drastically his life as he knows it. I understand that feeling. except for me, its not exactly acknowledgement of myself, its doing something about it. while I didnt exactly stay in the closet long, that feeling of not wanting anything to change is why the closet exists. i realized i was queer in 2014, trans 2015. came out as bi that summer, but i didnt come out as trans until 3 years later. when I had a job. access to money if i ended up getting kicked onto the street. i literally had a bag packed and ready to go. and yet. even when i did come out, i was too afraid to correct my family on my pronouns or name for another year. my sibling really helped with that. immediately used them. Tbh theyre my fave person and id do anything they asked.

the whole thing about there still being time.

i see a lot of tiktoks about this. people watning to do stuff now bc there is still time to change your life or whatever. im interpreting it differently.

there is time now, but your hourglass will run low eventually. live while you still can, while you can still do something about it. how that message showed up after maddie left- their time together had run out, but he might still be able to do something. make a change. idk. but owen was too scared to do anything.

im still scared to do anything.

i still dont correct people on my name or pronouns if they get them wrong. i still dont speak up if my family says anything not pc (they are learning tho). im too scared to talk about any big feeling i have bc ive always been brushed off in the past and i dont want to feel worse becasue of it.

i still havent done anything to get my name or gender marker changed bc im scared. idk why. ive been living as a man for 6 years, i got top surgery almost 3 years ago, and ive been on hrt for nearly 2.

it terrifies me for some reason. maybe ts the complexity of it. ive found 3 different versions of the paperwork, and nowhere does it tell me exactly how or who to submit it too. one of those said i could submit online but it had to be printed, notarized, and scaned back into the computer? none of the other versions said it had to be notarized???

and i have nobody who has any knowlege that could help. my aunt worked for a lawyer for years, and yet she just said all I have to do is go to the dmv. like babe. no. thats not how that works.

i think ill start on that again.

while i still have time.

[sergeantmicah]

Micah Lore pt 1:

I think he would get a long with everyone like soap cause why not. The 141 call my oc and Soap twins because of how similar they are

He is on loan from the Canadian military. Former sniper. Was pretty good at it but it is not his thing. Turned to medical and loves that instead. The 141 needed another pair of hands in the medical office so they came up with an agreement with Canada to loan Micah to the task force provided that Micah also is involved with missions

He is that meme of I’m a healer but and is also I can name every bone in your body while breaking them

He’s like 5’9 and medium build. But he can hold himself in a fight

Can’t win against bigger guys but knows the human weakpoints so he uses his medical knowledge in a fight

Can read French is shit at speaking it. I want his youth to be involved with swimming and kickboxing. His canines are really sharp and longer than normal. He jokingly gets called a vampire cause of them but he swears he doesn’t like the taste of blood. Loud laugh and isn’t afraid to show it

He is very protective of his friends. He kinda rivals Soap. If someone gets hurt on a mission he gets very angry and will literally handcuff his friends to the bed if they are injured enough cause he knows that they are really stubborn

Has had to killed his comrades in more than one occasion due to them betraying him and joining Hassan. So he is determined to make sure that never happens again

I feel like he was taken a tortured a couple of times so he has some deep gauges on his ribs and stomach. So he doesn’t like to go shirtless

He randomly wakes up with bruises and doesn’t know where they came from. Will murder anyone in the morning before he gets coffee

I want Micah to be shy meeting new people. Social anxiety™️

Fav drink is cocktails. The guys make fun of him but like in a friend way

"That’s a cute drink there Mikey" "Fuck off Soap"

Him and Köing are really good pals. Talking about being on loan from different countries and anxiety. Also they just get along

Köing putting Micah on his shoulders>>>

You see them running towards you like 11ft tall at night wdyd. It’s scared Ghost. GHOST

Gaz and him tpose at Price. Price is never amused

Gaz and Micah having matching friendship necklaces. Like from Clair’s

Def intimidated by Ghost at first but warms up to him. Don’t let Micah, Soap and Ghost in a room alone. They will make bad dad jokes until someone murders them

He is Price’s secret second fav. (His first is Gaz obviously)

Always has a mini med kit on him

Price knows about his trans status obv but no one else really does. He showers late at night when everyone is asleep and no one sees him with his shirt off

Micah sends Ghost memes and has to explain them to him

“They’re makin a bloody Barbie movie?” “YOU DON’T KNOW ABOUT THE BARBIE MOVIE??”

“Don’t you know culture ghost?”

When they go out to a bar Micah always seems to get free drinks. The 141 don’t know why they get jealous

Some how one of them finds out that Micah is trans and he freaks out like yeah. But the other guys are chill they beat up people if they ever find out

A rookie makes like a trans joke and the 141 just death

Sleepy drunk Micah piggybacking on König >>>

He customized his boots to hide some gauze and some small knives in them. He’s got like a million tiny knives on him at all times because he doesn’t want to get captured again

Micah absolutely gets mad when he tastes the “syrup” the base has. He’s like this isn’t…the real shit… (brought the real stuff w him). Soap n Gaz steal it and Micah nearly kills them. He is fine with Gaz cause he asked politely but Soap rip it was nice knowing you

That’s all for now!

[heavenlyhischier]

only when you're high - rafe cameron

word count: 4.3k

summary: Rafe only ever talks to you when he's high, and you've eventually had enough.

warnings: angst i guess, language, mentions of drugs and alcohol, lil makeout sesh at the end

note: ik this isn't the request but i've been working on this for a while so here ya go <3 this is def not my best writing so dont judge it too harshly

3:53 a.m.

You had been dreaming about your cat taking over a world full of people with fish heads when the incessant ringing from your phone jolted you awake. You blindly flung your hand onto the nightstand, knocking over a half empty water bottle and a bottle of ibuprofen before your fingers grazed the cool screen. You picked up the device, nearly blinding yourself when you opened your eyes to see who was calling you at such an ungodly hour. Once your eyes adjusted to the screen’s brightness, the name ‘Stupid Kook’ was displayed across the top. You hesitantly swiped to answer.

“What in the flying fuck do you want,” You whisper yelled, propping your half-conscious body up with your elbow.

“Hey, baby,” He greeted, his voice dragging as if he was thinking too hard about his words. “Just wanted to hear your voice.”

You stopped breathing for a moment, not sure what you were supposed to say to his weird revelation. You had been having a weird thing with Rafe for a few months now. After many drinks, you would often finding yourself making out with him in a secluded area. Despite your random make out sessions, he had never once called you to simply hear your voice. In fact, he hadn’t even called you before. It was usually always a quick ‘wyd’ text at midnight and nothing more.

“That’s weird, you’ve never called me before,” You pointed out, “You’ve also never called me baby before, so what’s that about?”

“Mm, I don’t know. Always wanted to call you that before so why not? What are you up to, baby,” He asked, his words slurring together in a way that could only happen while under the influence.

“You’re high aren’t you,” You sighed. Of course, he was high. You should have known that from the get-go. Rafe Cameron wouldn’t have called you sober; he never even looked at you sober.

A brief silence hung over the line, Rafe’s heavy breathing being the only thing coming through the receiver. “Maybe a little. Had a rough day, so I went to see Barry and now I’m at Topper’s. Talking to you.”

You couldn’t help but let a small smile grace your features; a smile that was gone almost as soon as it came. You let your elbow fall from its position, your head falling back onto the pillow that was still warm from when you were asleep. “How sweet of you. What are you doing, anyways? Shouldn’t you be getting shitfaced and taking some innocent girl to bed?”

He let out an airy laugh before speaking. “The only one I’d like to take to bed is you, and we somehow always stop before it gets to that point. Anyways, it’s just me, Topper, and Kelce, and I started thinking about us in the back of my truck when we were outside. Before I knew what I was doing, you answered the phone.”

Your cheeks flared red as images of Rafe’s hands exploring your body flashed through your mind, the feeling of his ring on your skin igniting something inside of you. His mouth latching onto the sensitive spots of your neck as your moans filled his truck. You let your fingers ghost over your lips as if you could still feel his own on yours. More memories of him exploring your body in every way but the way you wanted him most were running through your mind. Every time you wanted to give in to him, give in to your urges, but you couldn’t.

“You know, I’ve never wanted someone as much as I want you and I hate it,” He started, his words still slow, “I hate it because you’ll never let me have you.”

“Rafe,” You groaned, running a hand over your tired face, “I don’t really feel like giving myself to someone who only talks to me when they’re drunk or high. Someone who would rather be caught dead than with a pouge.”

“You know it’s not like that, baby. It’s complicated,” He tried, and you could tell there was a hint of unfamiliar panic in his voice.

“It always is. Guess I’ll see or talk to you next time you get fucked up. Goodnight Rafe,” You whispered before hanging up on the boy, ignoring his desperate protests.

1:38 a.m.

You turned the shower water off before stepping out onto the cool tiled floor, water dripping from every part of your body. You chose to ignore the buzzing coming from your phone, moving to grab the towel hung on the back of your bathroom door. However, the buzzing started again as you were drying off your legs.

“Who the fuck,” You groaned as you wrapped the towel around your still wet body. ‘Stupid Kook’ was making a second appearance, much to your surprise. “Yes, Rafe?”

“What’s up your ass,” He laughed his infectious laugh. You could picture him throwing his head back and his glazed over eyes twinkling with amusement, something you had only seen when you found yourself admiring him from afar.

“Nothings up my ass. Just don’t know what your high ass wants this time.” You gripped your phone in your hand and started to walk back towards your room. Your parents had fallen asleep hours ago, so you had to make sure you were quiet. However, that deemed difficult in the darkest hours of the night in your already poorly lit house. You bumped your hip and stubbed your toe on just about anything that was out in the open. Once you were in your room, you hastily shut the door and flipped the light switch on.

“Hello! Hello! Hello! Where are you,” Rafe yelled, making you wince and pull the phone away from your ear.

“Jesus, dude. Calm down, I was walking back to my room,” You chastised, doing your best to hold your phone in between your ear and shoulder.

“What were you doing? I missed you,” He pouted.

You ignored the swelling you got in your heart and said, “I was leaving the bathroom. I just finished showering. What are you doing?”

You grabbed a clean pair of underwear and a shirt you had taken from JJ after you had thrown up over whatever you were wearing that night. Rafe began telling you what he was doing, which was quite literally nothing. However, he quickly dove into a spout of how you were naked and wet and how badly he wanted to see you without any clothes on. Your cheeks were burning as he went on and on about all of the sinful things he wanted to do to you. You let him ramble on a bit more as you turned the light off once you were clothed and ready for bed.

“Okay, that’s enough, Rafe,” You stopped him, pulling your blanket back so you could crawl in bed. “So, calling me two times within a week? You falling in love with me?”

It was so painfully obvious that it was a joke, but you could practically feel the tension radiating through your phone from Rafe’s end. His abrupt silence concerned you because this boy was far from silent when he was doped out.

“Maybe I am,” He finally got out, and you couldn’t detect any sarcasm in it.

“Sure you are,” You rolled your eyes, blaming exhaustion for briefly clouding your judgment, “If you were in love with me, you’d actually talk to me when you aren’t too fucked to remember your own name.”

You started picking at a loose thread on your blanket as you let your mind wander to what life would be life if you had an actual relationship with Rafe. Going to parties with him. Hanging around the Island Club with him and his friends. Him doing lines off your body before having his way with you.

“I will talk to you when I’m not high,” His voice broke you from your thoughts, “If that’s what you really want.”

“I do,” You said way too quickly, “I mean, yeah sure. That would be nice, I guess.”

“Just text me and I’ll answer.” You couldn’t stifle the yawn that escaped your lips, but you did try and hide it from Rafe. Your attempt was no good, though. “You’re tired, go to bed.”

“No, I’m fi-.”

“Goodnight, Y/N,” Rafe shouted over you, “Talk to you soon, baby.”

Rafe’s name popped up on your phone screen every few days after he had gotten drunk out of his mind or too high to do anything other than find your contact. You didn’t mind it at first, but after you had texted him during the day and those messages went unanswered, you grew hurt and annoyed. You had tried asking him why he wouldn’t respond, but he always found a way to change the subject. You wanted to ask him about it in person, but you hadn’t seen him in almost a month. You wanted to ask him why he couldn’t bother to pick up the phone when he was sober, but wasted no time in calling you as soon as he got his bump in.

One of the nights he called, you offered to have him come over because your parents were gone, but he said no. Made up some excuse about how he was staying with Topper for a while since Sarah cheated on him and he wanted to be there for his friend. You understood that, so you didn’t push him after that. Then, the next time you told him about a party everyone was going to and how you wanted to see him there. You even told him to bring the other two. That time he told you he was staying away from parties for a while, wanting to stay to himself for the most part due to the constant stress from his dad. You knew how Ward could be sometimes, so it wasn’t hard to believe him and move on from there.

You wanted to be mad to him for only acknowledging you when he was high, but you couldn’t be. You’ve always wanted to feel wanted by somebody, and he made you feel like that albeit only when he was far gone from reality. You could deal with it as long as you got to talk to him, no matter how insecure it made you. Well, you thought you could.

2:25

Your parents were gone for the night, so you opted to watch Marvel movies in the living room. You were so invested in watching Iron Man and shoving popcorn in your mouth that you didn’t feel your phone go off the first six times. Or the fifteen times after that. Not that you would have cared either way. You knew the only person it could be was the boy who never wanted you sober. The credits began rolling across the TV, so you finally decided to pick up your discarded phone. You were shocked to see Rafe had called you eight times and texted you thirteen. Overall, his texts said the same thing.

Why aren’t u answering me :(

Call me pls

I wanna talk to you baby

It was if he knew you were finally looking at your phone because his contact popped up not ten seconds later. You rolled your eyes, but reluctantly answered.

“Y/N! Where have you been,” He whined into the receiver, “I’ve been trying to call you for like two hours.”

“Watching movies,” Your words were sharp and short, not particularly wanting to talk to him right now. You’ve nearly reached your breaking point with him.

Rafe could immediately tell something was off with you by the way you sounded. “What’s wrong, baby? Are you okay?”

You took a deep breath in, setting your bowl of popcorn on the coffee table after you paused the end credit scene. You leaned forwards and planted your elbow on your knee as you held your head in annoyance.

“I’m fine, Rafe. I’m just getting fed up with you only wanting to talk to me when you’re high or drunk,” You started, “I used to be fine with it because it once every couple of weeks, but now it’s almost every day and it’s annoying. You told me to text you when you’re sober, and I did, but you never responded. I try and offer to come over to you or have you come to me, but you always have an excuse. I know you want to be there for Topper and you don’t really want to be around anyone right now, but that doesn’t mean I have to put up with it.”

“Y/N, I know, and I’m sorry. It’s just-It’s complicated. Please understand that,” He was practically begging you to listen to him.

“Rafey, are you coming back to play beer pong with us,” A female voice suddenly cut through the sudden sound of music.

Your breathing stopped and your heart felt like it was being squeezed by Rafe’s own hand. A wave of heartbreak crashed over your entire body. “‘I just don’t want to be around anyone’ huh? Thought you were just spending time with Topper for a while? You know, if you didn’t want to see me, all you had to do was say so,” You whimpered, hurt now mixing with your anger and annoyance.

“No, wait,” He tried, yelling at whoever came in the room to get out, “Y/N, please. It isn’t lik-“

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence. It is like that, Rafe. It is exactly like that. You don’t want to see me, and that is fine. I get it. Why would you ever want to be seen with someone from the Cut? It doesn’t matter, though. Don’t call me anymore. You lied to me. That is not something that I can forgive,” Your tears were too strong to hold back now, “I don’t care for liars, Rafe Cameron, and you’re the biggest one of all.”

You quickly hung up and turned off your phone, throwing it towards the end of the couch so you weren’t tempted to grab it. You grabbed the large blanket from the back of the couch, picked another movie, and let your tears fall as it played in front of you.

“Honey,” Your moms gentle voice broke through, “You fell asleep on the couch.”

You slowly opened your eyes, letting them adjust to the bright light shining through the giant window. The headache hit you like a ton of brinks, causing you to squeeze your eyes shut in pain. Your mom was hovering over you, her hand on your shoulder and her soft eyes pretending to not notice how puffy your cheeks and red your eyes are.

“I guess so,” You mumbled, pushing yourself up into a sitting position, “I’ll go lay down in my room. I’m still tired.”

She gave you an understanding nod with a caring smile and helped you off the couch. Her hand lingered on your back as if she wanted to say something to you, but she decided to leave it alone for now. You would talk to her when you were ready, if you ever were. You gave her a thumbs up when she told you her and your father would be out again most of the day.

Your feet dragged as you stumbled back to your room, using the wall to keep you steady. You pushed the door open with your foot and gave your cat, who was laying on your bed as if she owned it, a stupid smile. You fell onto the bed and pulled her onto your chest as you turned your phone back on. You were scared to confront the actions from last night, but knowing Rafe, he probably wouldn’t have bothered to even send you a text about it. You were quickly proven wrong the moment your phone turned back on. The vibration from all of the texts, voicemails, and snapchats felt like it lasted for five straight minutes. Nearly all were from the boy you wanted nothing to do with. Although, you noticed a voicemail from Topper, who you forgot even had your number.

Um, hey its Topper. Look dude, I don’t know what happened, but Rafe is freaking out like a bitch right now. He keeps mumbling shit about how he fucked things up with, which I didn’t even know you two were a thing but whatever I don’t really care. He kicked everyone out of my house and has been calling and texting you for like thirty minutes straight now so please call him back, so he shuts the fuck up. If not for him, do it for my sanity before I kill him. Uh, yeah, thanks, bye.

You sighed deeply after the voicemail cut off, your heart rate increasing at the thought of Rafe being upset. If he was bad enough that Topper of all people called you, you knew it was bad. You wanted to not care because of how he made you feel, but you did. You’ve always cared about the blond boy more than you cared to admit. You finally decided to look at the messages he sent you.

Y/N pls call me back

I’m sorry its not what it looks like and I know that sounds stupid but its true

Pls talk to me. I need u to talk to me

I promise that I never wanted to hurt u ok???

I love you, Y/N. Please call me or I’m coming to your house tomorrow.

The world stopped spinning when you read the last message. You kept reading it over and over again as if you misread it the first time. Rafe had never been any kind of affectionate with you until he called you baby. Rafe Cameron was not someone known to get emotional, so you weren’t sure if you believed his words. He was a liar and would do anything to get what he wanted, so what was different now?

You heard a knock on the door followed by your moms muffled voice, but you were too focused on the situation in front of you to notice who it was. Your eyes were glued to the screen, staring at the three words you never thought anyone other than your family and friends would say to you. The world around you was fading away, your heart feeling as if it was going to beat out of your chest as tears slid down your still puffy cheeks. You weren’t going to let him do this to you. You weren’t going to let him toy with you anymore.

“Y/N,” A deep voice dragged you out of your subconscious.

Your eyes darted over to the door and saw the last person you wanted to see. Rafe was standing there, his eyes wide and blood shot and he looked like total shit. His hair was a wild mess, nothing like its usual tamed state. You met his gaze and you wished you hadn’t. One look from him and you were puddy in his hands. One look and every thought you had about never seeing him again flew out the window.

“Hey, can we talk,” He mumbled, his bright blue eyes looking everywhere but at you. “Please.”

Not trusting your words, you gave him a swift nod and gestured to the spot next to you on your bed. You leaned to the side and placed your cat on the ground, watching as she rubbed herself all over Rafe’s leg before scampering away. His walk to your bed was painfully slow, and you wanted to tell him to hurry up, but you knew that was unreasonable.

“What do you want, Rafe,” Your voice was harsh, trying to ignore the urge to reach out to him. “What do you want to talk about? How you only use me for your own pleasure? How you only ever even look at me when you’re drunk or high? How you lied to me? Wanna talk about that?”

Your anger surprised even yourself. One second you wanted to hold him in your arms and comfort him, but then the memory of how he treated you came back and flipped a switch in your brain. You don’t know how you feel and you hate it.

“I deserve every bit of your anger,” He breathed out, letting his hand fall dangerously close to your own, “But please let me explain everything to you, okay?”

“Fine,” You gave in, “Talk.”

“Yeah, thank you, okay. I really do want to talk to you when I’m not absolutely fucked, I do. I know that it doesn’t seem like that, but its true. I just, I can’t. Every time I look at you, think about you, I hear my dads voice screaming at me that I will never be good enough for anyone. I have this thought drilled into my head every day that no matter what I do, who I am, I am just never enough. To me, you’re no exception to that. In fact, you remind me even more. Wait no.”

Rafe rubbed both of his hands over his face and tugged at his hair, afraid that he’s already fucking this up. “Rafe,” You gently spoke up, turning to grab his hands from his face. “It’s fine. Keep going.”

His eyes met yours and you could see how strained he was. There were too many emotions swirling in his eyes for you to pinpoint exactly what he was feeling. “Okay, um, okay. To me, you are way too good for me, so the only time I feel comfortable talking to you is when I’m high. I’ve never had trouble talking to any girl before, but you’re more than that to me. You’re more than just some girl to me and it scares me, so I feel like I have to be, yanno, not me. When I talk to you. I want to be with you more than I have ever wanted to be with someone in my life”

Your hand was still holding his as you let his words sink in. Him revealing how his dad truly made him feel made your heart ache for him. It made you want to grab him by the face and tell him how he is more than good enough. You wanted to let him in, but you weren’t sure if you were ready for the risk that came along with it. You’re not sure if you want all the things that came with being with Rafe Cameron. He’s followed by hurt and lies, and you do feel guilty thinking that, but it’s been proven true countless times.

“Rafe, listen to me,” You began, moving so you were straddling him and holding his face in your hands. His hands immediately came to grip your hips, and you are well aware that this was a more than compromising situation. “I understand that your father is probably the worst person we both know, but that doesn’t excuse you lying to me. I don’t know if I can trust you, no matter how much I may want to.”

You watched as tears gather in his eyes, and he was doing his best to keep them at bay. He had never felt the way he feels about you before, and he’s more than aware that his reputation precedes him. He knows that he’s done nothing more than prove how untrusting he is to you, but he wouldn’t let that stop him from trying to prove to you that he means what he’s saying.

“I know that nothing I say will fix what I’ve already done. I know that, but I can show you just how much you mean to me, if you’ll let me. We can go at your pace. Do things your way. Just, please, give me another chance to prove myself to you.”

You’re searching for any detection of a lie in his eyes, in his voice, but you come up empty. You wipe away the stray tears that broke through his wall of protection. You hesitantly placed your forehead on his, and you could hear him take in a sharp breath at the connection. Your eyes fluttered closed, your nose brushing against his as you weighed all of your options.

“Did you mean what you to me? In your last text,” You whispered, too scared to open your eyes and look at him. “Do you actually love me?”

“More than you know,” His breath was hot against your chin, and he pulled you closer into him.

You decided to take a leap, dive into something that scared you more than anything. Your lips finally met his, and Rafe wasted no time in returning the feeling. Your hands fell from his cheeks and clasped each other behind his neck, while his hands stayed placed on your hips, too scared to push you too far. You deepened the passion filled kiss by pulling him closer to you and running your tongue across his bottom lip. Rafe’s lips moved in such a sensual way that you almost didn’t know how to react. It was much different from the lust filled kisses you’ve shared in the past. You started moving your hips on top of him, an action that had him gripping your hips tighter than before.

Y/N,” Rafe breathed out after he broke away from you, “If you don’t stop, I don’t know if I can control myself.”

“Then don’t.”

i have not edited this so if you see a mistake lmk. love u

[romeoandjulietyouwish]

Ok so I'm not sure if something like this was discussed already cause i haven't seen all of the posts for the streamer au (and this is kinda more about gaming than streaming tbh), but I've just been thinking how Percy's love for tinkering could also be translated in this au to him being one of those gamers that are super into building and customizing their own pc and he knows all about it and is def the person they all turn to for advice and when they want to upgrade, and he's always offering to help them with installing the hardware to their PC and stuff (Maybe he'd also be making videos of custom pc builds? Reviews and unboxings? And later on he'd be making them with Tary? Tech Bros?) 

And also I think he'd be VM's tech wiz whenever they're having computer (or streaming equipment) issues and stuff like that (like your modern au with percy coming to fix things at vex's apartment, just with pc and internet issues etc)

Also i could see vex & vax not really being able to afford high quality pcs, at least at first, so they can't play the games that have a lot of system requirements, and it's a bit sucky but they make do, there are a lot of other games after all

And maybe for Vex's birthday, before they're even together, Percy builds her a new shiny and really strong pc, all custom built? (And he gets her a gamer keyboard and mouse and the mouse pad has a bear design or something? 🥺 cause her handle name would probably be bear related lbr), and she's so excited she can finally play the games she's been wanting to play since forever but couldn't because of her old pc specs And she'd obviously be taken aback by this, and i dunno, maybe she'd thank him during a stream (i mean, she can't not mention it, the difference is Visible) and well that would clearly cause people to be like. are they dating are they just Like That what is Going On (ohh and since it's Vax's birthday too Percy would also get him something but like. more modest? maybe a better mic or headset or something, and Vax would tease him that he obviously has a favorite twin)

omg I love that

Just him knowing the exact kind of set up she'd love and going out of his way to find a bear theme and spending hours building it so it's perfect but it's all worth it when she sees it for the first time and gives him the biggest hug and cries just a little because she's never had something like this before. And from then on Percy decides that he is going to giver her everything she could ever want, he has the money to so why shouldn't he shower the woman he adores in gifts?

And before they get together, Vex constantly calls him with questions about how to make her shitty computer run without making a cacophony of noise. And that's how he starts to learn what she likes in a set up and even though she calls a lot, he finds that it never annoys him, in fact he kind of hopes that her set up breaks so he has an excuse to talk to her and come over.

[basilly]

general dating quackity headcannons || irl!quackity x reader

. pronouns: (they/them)

. warnings: none!

. dating this man is chaotic

. constantly screaming, cackling, laughing, etc.

. will share his beanies with you

. he loves to show you off on his streams

“Guys guys guys this is my s/o- aren’t they just perfect?”

. expect chipotle runs all the time- but he will know your order by heart

I feel like his love language would be ordering you food (even though its not rlly one)

. sings you cheesy love songs, esp in spanish

. petnames def include: babe, bebe, bby, mi amor, love

. you help out on cooking streams (to make sure he doesn’t burn the house down)

. will most definitely try to act tough around you but absolutely melt at your touch

. when he first met you- he was kinda flustered and taken back

    - like “who is this person?” you intrigued him a lot

. would either accidentally confess to you or you ask him out 

. he loves it when you have your head resting on his shoulder, just ✨warmth✨

. when hes sick- you know he’s going to be such a baby

. he will try to get you to carry him on your back or bridal style and post that for your anniversary

. although i feel like he wouldn’t get you flowers or gifts very often, but he will always tell you that he loves you and you are his world

. when he’s studying and you’re there doing your own work he would just stop and stare at you sometimes until you snap him out of it

. takes you out on competitive dates- mini golf is a favorite

“HAH! Look at that- I got a parrr”

“You’re losing Quackity, love”

“ NO IM NOT- I’m letting you win because I love you ;)”

“Uh huh, sure”

. when you are cuddling, he loves to play with your hair

. loves loves loves being the small spoon and put his head in the crook of your neck

. if you are laying in bed, he will 100% run and jump on you 

. when he posts about sally or taylor swift, you can jokingly say you are hurt and pout, and he will shower you in love 

“NOO waitt noo i love youU”

. if you join him on stream, he’s going to be so clingy and chat will take so many screenshots and clips

“CHAT CHAT I AM NOT A SIMP OKAY? THAT”S KARL” he knows he is a simp though

. you could totally be trying to focus on work/reading/hobby/etc. and you would just hear him screaming and laughing, although you may not tell him off at first, just smiling and shaking your head

. if you stay in his room while streaming and you’re just staring at him, if he catches you he would just have this cute little smile of adoration, feeling loved by your presence and gaze

. if you cup his face in your hands, he melts like butter, and he def wants a kiss like that LOL

. he would do anything to make you comfortable in any situation, even if you disagree and say it’s fine

. he could hardly ever say no to you- maybe if you ask something completely ridiculous but he would be totally in with crazy ideas

. if you were long distance, he would facetime you for most streams so you could watch and he could see you laugh

. his only goal is to hear your laugh, he loves it so much

. if you were sad, he would comfort you with hugs or try and make you laugh

. overall, very chaotic but sweet

an: requests are open! i wanted to post again :) my next ones might be a little short, my motivation is lacking but still there

[whomst-art-thou-whomst-whomst]

Texts from the Lost Tomb, part 5.4

I swear folks once I get this and the last part up I’m gonna condense it all

But yeah couldn’t resist some <3

Zhang and Wu Chat

Wu Xie: Um. I’m all done with the shower if you want a turn.

Zhang Qiling: I’m alright without one.

Wu Xie: sooo are you pissed at me still?

Zhang Qiling: ? I have not been angry with you since the ladder incident.

Wu Xie: you’ve barely said anything since the necklace thingy

Zhang Qiling: I believe it is a long-running joke amongst my friend group that I do not, in fact, say much.

Wu Xie: okay but there are multiple gouges in the tea house walls that would suggest you had somewhat strong feelings today

and I kinda caused the events that sparked said feelings

so just checking in you know

Zhang Qiling: I was not angry so much as I was afraid. More afraid than I’ve been in a long time.

Wu Xie: ??? But it has worked out fine??? Everyone made it out alive and Uncle Erbai gets to feel morally superior to the Zhang family for a while so today was a win overall

Zhang Qiling: I heard you scream. I didn’t know what had happened. I couldn’t get to you right away. Therefore, I was afraid.

Wu Xie: ohhhhh. oh, Xiao Ge. It’s alright now—hey the necklace was actually helping u look out for me:) It’s not like those ppl were actually trying to hurt me, really. Your family isn’t so bad, at least you don’t have any uncles you know of

today was just some big misunderstandings wrapped in some poor life choices. Tbh my memoir title

I feel kind of stupid for screaming but when a glowing necklace wraps itself around your neck it’s a little uhoh moment lol

I did like the design tho def my aesthetic.

Zhang Qiling: I am pleased that it was able to protect you when I was not.

Wu Xie: Uh no you are not allowed to get all emo abt this it’s only like 3pm

damn time flies when it’s flashing before your eyes lol

Are you on the roof? You’re def on the roof. I thought I heard the tiles moving over my head. Come down or I’m coming up.

Zhang Qiling: I will be down in a moment. Do not come outside, it’s cold and raining.

Wu Xie: you know, Zhang Rishan said he thinks the necklace might be linked to you, somehow

something from long ago, even though you wouldn’t remember it.

It’s lucky that it liked me, huh:)

Zhang Qiling: Yes. Quite lucky.

Babysitters Club Chat

Wang Pangzi: AWW LOOK AT HIM NAPPING ON YOUR SHOULDER SO CUTE. BEBES HAD A BIG DAY. YOU TWO ARE PRECIOUS. BE GOOD AND POSE FOR THE PICTURE NOW.

Zhang Qiling: No. Also, I am considering what steps I should take with Zhang Rishan. Regardless of his concern for the Zhang family line, his actions were unacceptable.

Wang Pangzi: HES DROOLING A LITTLE ON YOU WHICH IS LESS CUTE BUT I CAN CROP THAT PART

LOOK I KNOW YOURE STILL PISSED. IM NOT EXACTLY CALM MYSELF, I JUST HAVE WAYS TO SKIRT AROUND TIANZHENS BULLSHIT FILTER THAT YOU LACK

GET ON MY LEVEL

WU ERBAI WILL HANDLE IT, THINGS HAVE SETTLED I THINK

BUT ABOUT THAT NECKLACE

SO INTERESTING HMMM

Zhang Qiling: I am the patriarch of my family. The necklace behaved as I would, apparently, to protect a vulnerable family member. Wu Xie’s bad cold last week activated it, and it responded to a perceived danger to him today. Simple enough.

Wang Pangzi: UH HUH

A FAMILY MEMBER

THE NECKLACE REALLY SAID LOVE WINS

TOLKIEN COULD NEVER

Zhang Qiling: It protected him on a technicality. But I will not allow him to bear the burdens of my family ever again. It has taken so much from him already.

Wang Pangzi: YEAH SURE BLAH BLAH DESTINY BLAH BLAH ANGST

“A TECHNICALITY” WOW WHO SAID ROMANCE WAS DEAD

ANYHOO IM SCREENSHOTTING THIS FOR UR WEDDING RECEPTION SLIDESHOW

YA KNOW DURING MY SPEECH

Friends of Wu Xie Support Group Chat

Hei Yangjing: you’re welcome for everything today<3 I accept PayPal, although of course it is always my honor to assist my friends:)

Wang Pangzi: WE ARENT PAYING YOU SHIT

Zhang Qiling: You did absolutely nothing.

Hei Yangjing: whoa whoa maybe I wasn’t threatening family members or busting up load-bearing walls like some undying divas I could name but I totes helped

or at least I was there for moral support maybe?

Zhang Qiling: The only reason I knew you were there at all was that as I lowered my blade from Zhang Rishan’s neck, I heard the camera click and saw you were taking a selfie making a peace sign, angled to have the two of us in the background.

Xie Yuchen: I saw it on social media just now. The caption is “#greatdaycatchingupwiththelads #blessed”

Wang Pangzi: TBH KIND OF JEALOUS I DIDNT THINK TO DO THAT

Hei Hangjing: okay yeah you see Xiao Ge that is a modern kind of help I should’ve known you wouldn’t be aware

It’s called performance, you wouldn’t understand

it’s a ‘Gram thing

Also it means I’m a great person

Bc letting you handle the situation was my gift to you

Zhang Qiling: Wu Xie mentioned there is something called “blocking ppl” that gets them out of my phone.

Hei Yangjing: nah

Can’t trust that Wu Xie, bae can’t tell a coffin from an urn amirite

it’s not a thing, blocking

Xie Yuchen: It is a thing. I’ll show you later, Zhang Qiling.

Wang Pangzi: YOU BOYS GO GET CLEANED UP AND COME BY AROUND 9 I SNAGGED SOME OF ZHANG RISHANS BOOZE ON THE WAY OUT

Bonnie and Clyde Chat

Hei Yangjing: you looked pretty comfortable in those handcuffs earlier ;););)

Xie Yuchen: Go to sleep, idiot.

Hei Yangjing: You’d have to do something to tire me out ;););)

Xie Yuchen: Are you like this around Wu Xie? Not that I care, I’m just asking.

Hei Yangjing: uh that’s a big nope

First off all Idk when I’ll die but Id prefer it to be on my terms and not at the hands of those other two

Secondly there is a part of me that remembers how adorable he was when he was younger and that makes it weird

(No offense but u were not adorable. He was bebe luke skywalker, you were bebe princess leia I am obvs Han Solo 4lyfe)

Also I’m a little scared that if i flirted with him and he flirted back he’d be better at it.

Xie Yuchen: All valid concerns.

Hei Yangjing: as cute as he is I don’t really wanna tap that.

Xie Yuchen: I see.

Hei Yangjing: do you tho

Main Chat

Wu Xie: okay folks who wants cocoa to top the evening off? I picked some up today:D

Wang Pangzi: UH YOU SPENT YOUR DAY BEING KIDNAPPED AND PLACATING A SENTIENT NECKLACE WHEN DID YOU HAVE TIME TO GET GROCERIES

FRANKLY THATS INTIMIDATING

Wu Xie: the tea house gift shop:)

Wang Pangzi: …YOU BOUGHT COCOA FROM YOUR KIDNAPPERS. FROM THEIR GIFT SHOP. DURING YOUR KIDNAPPING.

WU XIE

WU XIE WHY

Wu Xie: I mean we were there the whole day, it felt impolite not to buy anything.

Wang Pangzi: OH RIGHT GREAT POINT ID HATE TO BE RUDE TO THEM AFTER THEY WENT TO THE TROUBLE OF ABDUCTING US

LISTEN WHEN PPL STEAL YOU IT BECOMES FREE REIGN ON THEIR SHIT

UGH YOU PROBABLY GOT A RECEIPT AND EVERYTHING

WAS UR LITTLE SHOPPING TRIP BEFORE OR AFTER THEY STUCK U IN A DUNGEON TO EXPERIMENT ON YOU

WAIT NVM I DONT WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWER TO THAT

Wu Xie: look, let’s focus on the positives/ we are all okay, and we learned something new, that necklace is still active! It’s really quite nice-looking when it isn’t moving of its own volition.

Wang Pangzi: YOU AND YOUR RELENTLESS DUCKING OPTIMISM

ZHANG QILING ARE YOU SEEING THIS

Zhang Qiling: I would love some cocoa. I’ll come to the kitchen.

Wu Xie: I have special marshmallows for you!!

Wang Pangzi: I SEE

WE ARE SUBSCRIBING TO THE PRESTIGIOUS “FUCK IT WHY NOT” SCHOOL OF THOT TONIGHT

LOL SURE LETS GO COCOA IT UP

IVE GOT SOMETHING STRONG TO POP IN IT

Wu Xie: Still thinking about that design… I’d love another chance to examine that necklace under less Zhangy circumstances.

Kinda sad we couldn’t borrow it to use for illnesses and dangerous missions :/

ah well it’s for the best, a family heirloom should be treasured, preserved and protected<3

Zhang Qiling: I put it on your dresser.

Wu Xie: ???????

Wang Pangzi: AND THATS WHY YOU AND I ARE FRIENDS, XIAOGE <3

Wu Xie: I—

Zhang Qiling: Are those bunny-shaped marshmallows for me?