#did this as a thank you to the first person that supported me on kofi

[assassyart]

Happy Birth Kirishima. <3

[morning-star-joy]

daydreams

Pairing: Joel x F!Reader, Post-Outbreak Jackson Era

Summary: It's been years since Joel's kissed anybody, and your lips are all he can think about.

Tags/Warnings: Soft, Touch-Starved, Pining Joel. Grumpy x Sunshine. Resolved Tension. Mentions of alcohol and food consumption. Brief mentions of sexual desire. Entirely in Joel's POV. No mention of Reader's age or appearance other than wearing lipstick in one scene.

Wordcount: 6.4k

A/N: Really enjoyed exploring an entire Joel x Reader fic all in his head, focusing on how he falls in love with Reader. Big thank you to @joelsgreys who was excited about this idea with me, and @cupofjoel who always inspires me with her own amazing work (and that Clicker joke she made that ended up in this fic hehe)!

Here's my Kofi if you're interested in supporting my work further💜

Beautiful dividers by @saradika

Masterlist

People fucking love you.

It was the first of many things that Joel was burdened to discover about you, small facts and inconsequential incidents about who you were as a person that floated around in his subconscious until they burrowed under his skin, much like you did.

He could remember checking his patrol schedule on the board one chilly autumn day. A scarf that was decades old but new to him, too soft for his rough skin, was wrapped around his neck and keeping him warm while he peered over the heads of two men crowding in front of the arranged names.

Despite Joel’s size, he had always been good at not being seen if he didn’t want to be, at least when it counted. It was a harder habit to keep up with in Jackson, a place where everybody wanted to know anybody at all. The feeling of at least one set of eyes on him at all times when he walked the streets was an odd juxtaposition to the foreign comfort that radiated inside the town’s tall walls.

Not a watch kept on him, but curiosity that peered at him around every corner. He had thought it would die down eventually, but it lingered with a stubbornness even years later.

Now though, both men didn’t have a care in the world for his presence behind him, crowding around the board and a pair of names he couldn’t quite glimpse until one of them turned, jumping at the sight of the unintentionally imposing figure at their back.

“Oh!” the man let out a noise of surprise before recomposing. He was a newer patrolman, his name starting with a C, Chuck or something. “Joel, hey man. Didn’t see you there.”

The familiarity in the way his name is spoken makes Joel bristle for a moment, but he calms his raised hackles before it can be noticed.

Back in Boston, his name had been a familiar one spoken too. But hints of apprehension, even fear crept around the syllables of those who knew it, those who had heard it whispered in the alleys of where he’d left somebody’s blood splattered against the dilapidated brick walls.

“Hey,” the other patrolman offers in greeting when he notices the pair aren’t alone anymore, and Joel nods, glancing towards the two names their heads had been bent down around when they moved out of the way.

There’s a name he doesn’t have a face to place to it, another person new to patrol. He’d only seen the name in passing on the board each time he checked assignments recently, though this time it's right above his own, listed as his partner on his next route.

“Lucky man,” the other patrolman says with a clap to Joel’s shoulder, and he hates it, jaw setting tight enough that the first patrolman gently nudges his friend away with a wary look.

“I’m always stuck with Willy,” the first one says, and Joel glances back towards the board, searching for that name and seeing it paired with Chad. Names for faces, a common courtesy in the settlement, one he still had a hard time keeping up with sometimes, even years into being here. “Been dying for a chance to head out with her.”

There’s a gesture back towards the name paired with Joel’s, and he stares at the letters written into the thin wooden plaques that are used to arrange assignments on the board. Stares so much even as his fellow patrolmen leave, chattering amongst themselves about Joel’s new partner as he frowns in confusion over why it wasn’t his brother’s name.

“You could use some friends,” Tommy explains with a jovial smile when Joel shows up on his doorstep to question him about the change, though there’s an undertone of ribbing to his tone that makes Joel glare at the younger man. “I figure she’s the perfect one to bring you out of that stubborn shell.”

Joel scoffs at that, brows still knitted together in frustration as he gets ready for bed the night before he’ll have to wake up early to head out with this unknown person on patrol. He’s annoyed over the idea of something as irrelevant as socialization trumping protection on his route, frustrated that he’d have to watch his own back for the dangers only a human could pose, as much as the trail ahead of him for Infected.

But then he meets you, and he understands.

At least, Joel understands why those men had been jealous of his patrol partner when he shows up at the assignment board the next morning, hoping to grab a hot drink in one of the thermoses provided before heading out. He prays for at least the last dregs of some coffee when he sees a small gathering of other patrolmen, including the two from before. All smiles and laughter, until one turns their head towards him.

Joel meets your eyes for the first time, a smile gracing your face as he does so, and he understands.

“Joel Miller,” is the first thing you ever say to him by way of greeting, uttering the syllables in near disbelief, like he’s some fabled myth you’ve finally caught a glimpse of. There’s an infectious, positive energy in the way you say his name to him, in the way you say everything, he’ll come to find. Like there’s things in the world still worthy of being spoken with such excitement. “Good to finally meet you.”

He just nods, eyes flickering to the disappointment on the faces of those gathered around you as your attention focuses solely on him. You move closer, holding up two thermoses in hand, Joel’s gaze narrowing down to them as you gesture with each and ask, “Coffee or tea?”

With a blink, he stares at each before looking back up into your face, noticing the hint of amusement across your features as his lips part, and the first thing he utters in your presence is an awkward hedge of, “Uh.”

Your lips quirk up into a wider smile, and Joel notices then that for all its brightness, it's almost half a smirk. There’s humor in your gaze, and he feels those sharp hackles of his start to rise again until you clarify kindly, “Which do you prefer?”

His brows knit together, looking back down into your hands, and he realizes you’re offering him the choice of which one he wants for the morning.

“Coffee,” he says instantly before his mind can catch up, and the point of your teeth peek past your lips now in a grin when you pass the thermos to him.

“Smart man,” you comment in passing, oblivious to how the two simple words will stick into his mind and replay themselves in the exact tone of your voice for weeks to come. “I prefer tea, anyway.”

You raise your own thermos to his, eyes twinkling with that same good humor, that warm mirth that suddenly makes Joel’s stomach flip when you add, “Looks like the start of a beautiful partnership.”

It is.

Joel hates to admit it, but you work startlingly well together.

He’s paranoid at first, glancing back over his shoulder at you every now and then, but your eyes are always trained on the area around you, keeping diligent watch. Except for when he’s staring at you for too long, for reasons he doesn’t know yet, or is too stubborn to believe.

You somehow always catch him in those stolen moments, smiling at him when he whips his head back around to refocus on the trail in front of him. Sometimes there’s a soft chuckle under your breath when he does so, and those are the times he stubbornly faces ahead for the rest of patrol, so you won’t see the heat creeping into his face that he curses every time you bring it out of him.

He’s too goddamn old to be blushing like a schoolboy, but around you, his body betrays his age and does it anyway.

Sometimes you talk to him. Joel can’t figure out for the life of him why. You certainly aren’t the type to ever be searching for conversation, a whole host of willing participants to speak with you gathering around you every morning before you set out for patrol with him.

But you talk to him anyway. Offer things about yourself and ask him questions in return, ones he hardly answers with more than a few words, if he even replies at all.

That doesn’t bother you. You continue the conversation, and though he barely says a thing, you manage to make him still feel involved. Like you’re not just talking at him, but with him.

It’s just something about you, Joel eventually realizes. There’s a charm about you that goes beyond just a natural charisma. It’s a force of gravity, as inexplicable as it is irresistible, pulling in those around you, and they don’t even care. They want it.

Because you’re not simply bubbly and friendly, but you’re warm. Warm and bright, pure sunshine that brighten up the shortening days, and at some point through that fall of patrolling with you, Joel finds himself riding beside you instead of in front of you.

He nods more to what you say, following along better to whatever stories you’re sharing that morning, tales you never seem to run out of. He starts to answer your questions with sentences instead of words. Sometimes, he sneaks glances at you, and he’s always shocked in the moments when you’re already looking at him.

At first, Joel thinks he’s caught you in those moments. But you just smile at him when his eyes meet yours, unbothered by him noticing your attention on him, and he’s the one turning away yet again, facing the trees away from you so you won’t notice what that soft laughter of yours does to him.

You’re also more than capable in a fight, proving yourself time and time again in sticky situations, and soon enough, Joel doesn’t really mind waking up those early mornings when he knows you’ll be waiting for him with a thermos in each hand. He looks forward to an unnecessary apology on your lips if there’s no coffee that day, and the way you make him take a hot drink anyway—sometimes a pastry too, gently chiding him on taking better care of himself.

“I need you all big and strong for patrol,” you teased him once, but you still glance up and down his body with an appreciation he doesn’t think should be for him, even as he greedily drinks it in anyway. 

Then you wink, and he finds himself unable to make eye contact with you for the rest of the day.

Even then, he knows you’ll have his back, as he has yours.

Yeah, you work well together.

So well, in fact, that he finds his mood takes a sharp decline when he checks the assignment board months into being on patrol with you, and sees Tommy’s name paired with his again.

It makes sense. Winter arrives in Jackson, and with it, increased numbers of Infected on patrol. Joel needs to work with Tommy to clear out the routes hit the worst by hordes, for the good of the settlement.

Joel had never hated practicality before, but he does in that moment he first sees your name paired with Chad.

Chad, the young man with a stupid grin on his face while his buddy expresses jealousy over the “luck” of his assignment, and Joel hates the feeling of the same jealousy curling in his gut.

He hates it when you’re not waiting for him in the mornings. Hates it when your smile isn’t for him, when he’s not listening to your voice express every emotion imaginable in whatever story you’re telling him.

He doesn’t even realize what he’s feeling, doesn’t know that he’s lonely until he’s waiting for Tommy one morning when his brother kisses Maria goodbye before going on patrol.

It only hits him then, with the warm, open affection Tommy gazes at his wife with before leaving, and how she watches him with fondness as he goes. Only then does he feel the hollow ache in his chest, a gaping hole that’s only caved in deeper when your presence came and went.

He’s still thinking about it that night when sleep won’t come to him. Rubbing together his lips, chapped from the cold winter air from being outside all day, he wonders when the last time he’d had another mouth pressed to it.

Jesus, when’s the last time he kissed someone?

It’s a stupid thing to think, an embarrassing thought that has him turning onto his stomach and burying his face into his pillow. His arms outstretched beneath it, he groans into the fabric, trying to shove away the emptiness even as it continues to ache.

It fucking aches, and it shouldn’t. He was too old, had gone through too damn much to even care about kissing anybody.

So he tells himself he doesn’t. Convinces himself he couldn’t give less of a fuck about not being able to remember the last time he’d kissed somebody. Pretends he doesn't care about holding another person in his arms, lips pressed together just for the sake of it.

Joel likes to think he does a pretty good job of not caring about it, up until the next time he sees you.

You’re standing at the table of food and drink before patrol, eyes scanning over the pastries available with an intense look of deliberation for what you were craving that morning. When you find what you want, your lips part, tongue darting out to lick them in anticipation of your treat, and Joel’s blood runs hot in a way he thought himself no longer capable of.

He watches with rapt attention as you bring the scone to your mouth for a bite, how crumbs of it flake off onto your lips while you nod in satisfaction at the taste.

It’s a taste Joel wants to capture for himself. He wants to find the sweetness of the pastry on your lips, to press his mouth to yours and have you fill that emptiness, to have you soothe that ache in him with the exploration and discovery of you.

“Joel Miller!”

He blinks, hazy vision refocusing on the tantalizing soft look of your lips to see them curved up into a smile, and his eyes flicker up to see you looking right at him as you call to him, speaking his name like he’s still some legend you can’t believe exists until you see him again.

Yet again, he’s caught right in the center of your web—so many times now, that he almost starts to wonder if he willingly walks into it. Merciless to whatever you intend to do with him now that you have him right there, right where you want him.

But you just smile, head tilted with your gazes locked together, and suddenly he doesn’t care if you trap him or if he’s giving himself to you. You have him, and that’s enough.

Then, your lips part, tongue catching those crumbs still stuck to the corner of your upper lip, and Joel’s own lips part, breath hitching through them.

You notice.

You have to notice, because the edge of your smile curls up even more, eyes striking with the joy of a newfound discovery about the stoic man you’d found steadfast by your side for months of patrol, a silent presence now outright ogling you the same way everybody else did.

Everywhere you went, you were sure to find people lazing about in the warm rays of sunlight you cast from your very soul.

Joel wondered if you ever got tired with how much you gave. 

How much everyone took.

And now here he was, taking just the same. Your stunning vision reduced to an idle daydream, one you’d caught him in the very first moment he’d had it. 

Joel thought about what he must look like to you then. Just a lonely old man, longing for a touch. Like a mangy stray turning up at your doorstep, desperate just for the offhand chance of an ounce of kindness you had made the grave mistake of showing him before.

Because now he would always be back, aching for more.

Pathetic.

He turns from you at the sharp voice of self-hatred in his mind, walking away at the same moment you take a step forward. Joel brushes past those other souls just as eager, just as desperate for your attention as he tries to get far away from what you make him feel.

But it stays knotted up in his chest, ever more evident in your absence, the memory of your smile like a pain throbbing in his bones, ringing in his mind when he brushes off Tommy’s concern with a gruff “doesn’t matter” before heading out.

Because it doesn’t.

It doesn’t matter.

But it does.

Jackson had not only brought safety and comfort, but the luxury of wanting.

And, dear Lord, he wanted.

He hasn’t stopped wanting, not since that first morning when he really noticed the curve of your lips, the shape of them taunting and tempting him. 

Now he notices them every time he sees you. The slight quiver of them in a brush of cold winter wind, and how you pull a tube of homemade chapstick out of the pocket of your jacket to run over them. How you rub your lips together to spread it along each gorgeous line and indentation before popping them out with a smack, and Joel nearly fucking moans at the sight the first time.

God, he wants so badly.

He needs, he thinks sometimes, on the coldest, darkest nights. Thoughts of your mouth and what it would be capable of plaguing his mind as he breathes hotly into his pillow and tries to stay still, tries not to rut into the mattress just from the thoughts of what a simple kiss from you would feel like, giving and taking until it was impossible to tell where he ended and you began.

Because it was you.

It was always you.

Some days, it’s all Joel can think about. Your eyes, your hands, your laughter, but most of all, every bend and curve of your lips. 

It’s embarrassing how much just the mere thought of you consumes him. 

And it’s frightening, the power you would have over him if daydreams ever became reality.

What makes it even worse, is that he thinks you know. Joel’s almost sure of it, the way your eyes linger on him whenever you pout or purse your lips together at something especially grumpy that he says.

It’s like you’re doing it on purpose now, and he falls for it anyway, gazing at the fullness of your mouth, the most beautiful color he’s ever seen, with an aching want that he pretends never happened when it turns up into a smile.

Time and time again, you catch him wanting.

And you let him.

You never make a move to stop him, to call him out on it. Instead, you feed the fire, with a kindness in your smile and a mischief in your eyes that Joel is fucking addicted to.

If all you’re doing is stringing him along, he’s more than willing to let you do it, if it only means that the joy that lights up your face whenever you see him never dies out.

He sees it again one afternoon when he runs into you on the street, a bundle of produce from the greenhouses tucked underneath one arm that he almost offers to carry for you by some forgotten reflex, manners he used to have, when you distract him with a question of, “Are you going to that dinner for the patrolmen Maria is putting on?”

“Uh.” Joel winces at how he always finds himself hedging around you. He doesn’t think the things he’s said in your presence is enough to fill a page, even though you’ve plagued his thoughts enough that he could write a whole fucking book on you. 

There’s already a little smirk on your face as he hesitates, and he clears his throat, shifting on his feet with startling uncertainty you always drag from him as he finally responds gruffly, “Yeah, I s’pose so.”

“Great!” you chirp, your free hand patting him on the chest as you move to brush past him, fingers idling on the buttons of his flannel, gliding down along them in a way that sets all his nerve endings alight. “Save me a seat, would you?”

His body turns with the motion of you stepping past him to watch you go, breath caught in his throat as he wonders if you’re joking or not.

Regardless, he saves you a seat when that night comes.

It’s not like anybody wants to sit with him anyway. Most of the others seem to avoid him like the plague. Even years into being in the town, and Joel still feels like he sticks out like a sore thumb.

He doesn’t blame them. Even with his rough exterior growing softer than it had been in decades, he was a shit conversation partner. Joel just didn’t know how to do the things that they did anymore, not amongst strangers. He was happy enough with his own people, and he wishes that he was back home, playing guitar or watching movies with Ellie instead of sitting here alone, reminded constantly of everything he was lacking in.

When he’s asked if the seat next to him is taken so somebody can sit with their friend, Joel hesitates, resisting the urge to just get up and leave altogether when a familiar voice rings out, “It is!”

His head turns, and there you are, face aglow with a warm smile when you round the table towards him, and Joel is already halfway up out of his seat before he even realizes what he’s doing.

Your smile turns to him, eyes brightening with a spark at his quick movement that makes his heart pound in his chest, before you’re taking the back of the chair from the other patrolman’s grasp with a sweet, “Thanks, Astrid.”

When you start to pull the chair back further to sit, Joel takes it from you to do it for you, and it’s the first time he sees genuine surprise flash through your eyes. Still, you smile, and there’s a quiver of excitement to your lips that turns his aching into a yearning the longer he looks at them.

It’s also then when he notices that they’re painted, a shade of lipstick that fills them out further, complimenting your beauty with the way you had dressed so finely for the occasion tonight.

To sit next to him?

The question of futile hope echoes in his mind as you sink into the chair with a grin you’re trying to hide, and his hands are shaking as he pushes the chair in and takes his seat next to you again, something he also tries to hide as he folds them together and tucks them under the table.

When a bottle of wine is offered around, Joel can’t hold in a quiet chuckle at the way you jump in excitement for a glass. It's tilted in your fingers, the liquid swirling gently around the glass before you take a sip, and he’s enraptured by the sight of your lips wrapping around the rim, unable to glance away from the mark you leave on it once you set it back onto the table.

He’s fixated on that lipstick stain, can’t fucking look away from the shape of your lips painted onto the glass, and Joel starts to vividly imagine you leaving that mark on him instead. He wants evidence of your kiss all along his skin, down the collar of his shirt, smeared across his own lips as he takes your mouth in his, again and again.

He wants those marks trailing down, down, wants those painted lips teasing him until it smears all across that pretty face, wants them wrapped around his—

“Joel.”

His head snaps up, catching the gaze of his brother across from him. Tommy’s brow arches in question as he asks, “You good?”

“Yeah.” Joel clears his throat when his voice comes out thick, shifting in his seat while his folded hands move into his lap, shifting the napkin to help his new…issue. “Yeah, ‘m fine.”

“Really?” Tommy asks, his gaze one of suspicion, and maybe a bit of amusement as he drawls, “‘Cause I asked you if you wanted a glass of wine about three times, and you didn’t respond.”

Joel pales at being caught, jaw ticking with annoyance at the glee in his brother’s eyes when they snap to you sitting beside him, and he reasserts roughly, “I’m fine.”

Tommy backs off then, turning his attention somewhere else, and Joel almost relaxes until you hold your glass out to him and offer with a smile, “Want to try some of mine?”

The look in your eyes when the blood rushes back into Joel’s cheeks is nothing but goddamn trouble, and he fucking loves it.

You watch him as he stares at the mark of your lips on the glass. He imagines what it would be like to wrap his own lips around it, wondering if he’d taste you with the wine, and he quickly clears the lump that tightens in his throat before mumbling, “No, thank you, ma’am.”

A grin plays on your lips at that, and he doesn’t think he’s ever wanted anything more in his life than to kiss you at that moment. He wants to grab your face and pull you into him so fucking bad, wants your mouth to claim him, bruise him, make him hurt until he heals.

Instead, he keeps his hands to himself, still folded in his lap in a vice grip over his napkin now when you tease, “Ma’am, huh? I think I like that one.”

You wink, and all the blood flooding into his face suddenly rushes south.

Without a doubt, you had him completely fucked.

You talk to Joel the entire night.

Your head is turned to him throughout dinner, and you ask him more questions than ever before. Unlike your patrols, where you were content to tell stories, and he content to listen, you gently prod him to tell you his own. 

Joel’s voice is quiet when he assents, the low, gentle timbre hardly audible over the din of conversation around the long table. He’s sure he must be boring, a drab collection of colors long washed out in comparison to your blinding vibrancy, but you may as well have been the only two in the room with the way you listen to him.

You’re leaning in with your chin resting on a closed fist, nodding along to what he says with eyes dancing over his face so intently, as if to memorize him the same way he did you.

He’s surprised that he wants you to.

At the end of the dinner, when everybody’s bellies are full and they’re filtering out the door, Joel isn’t even shocked that he’s unwilling to leave your side. Though he is startled when the question slips quietly past his lips, “Mind if I walk you home, darlin’?”

You look back from where you were grabbing your jacket with wide eyes, stunned at the unexpected question and the pet name that had escaped him without a second thought. For a moment, he’s worried he finally scared you away, but then you smile.

“I’d like that.”

Joel nods, trying to calm the racing of his heart as he gently tugs the jacket from your grip and helps you put it on. He doesn’t miss the shiver that runs through you when his fingers brush against your skin, and suddenly there’s a feeling of anticipation simmering low in his belly, a warmth that spreads through his chest when the two of you stroll under the streetlights and eventually reach your doorstep.

You don’t let him turn away.

Somehow, he ends up on your couch. His boots and coat are left by your front door as he sits next to you, a glass of wine finally in his hand to ease the strain of his nerves. Your legs are tucked comfortably underneath yourself, the side of your face resting on the back of the couch, gazing up at him as you talk about nothing in particular.

You never seem to run out of questions for him. He answers the ones he can, and you’re not offended when he avoids the others. 

Tonight, Joel asks you questions too. Things he once thought didn’t matter anymore, but right now, he wants to know them all—where you grew up, your favorite movie, the concerts you’d been to before the world went to hell.

It becomes a back and forth—you ask him a question, he answers. Then it’s his turn to ask a question, and you answer.

Hours go by, wine is refilled, and when it’s your turn again, you ask him with such startling gentleness, “How long has it been since you kissed someone?”

Joel freezes.

His breath catches in his throat, and he can’t bring himself to look at you. He knows that when he does, he’ll see for sure that you’ve been aware of his pining, his fantasies, all along, and he doesn’t think he can face that.

Instead, he takes another long sip of wine, swallowing down the liquid courage before he answers lowly, “It’s, uh...been a while.”

Silence falls between you then, with more weight to it than any before in that night, and he has to fill it. So he does with the first thing that springs to his mind, “What about you?”

You hum thoughtfully, even as his heart lurches in his chest when the question spills from his lips. He can’t believe he actually fucking asked that, and then you actually answer it, “A couple months ago.”

Joel’s head snaps up, eyes glancing over your face as you trace the rim of your glass with a thoughtful expression.

“Was it…” he hesitates, before deciding he may as well say whatever he wants now that he’s already gone ahead and fucked it all up by asking about it in the first place, “good?”

“Nah,” you sigh, shrugging casually as you smirk in amusement at the recollection, “it’s like he was eating my face.”

Joel snorts at that, brow arching as he retorts dryly, “You go on a date with a Clicker or somethin’?”

You laugh then, head tilting back with the joyful sound, and he realizes it’s something he wants to hear for the rest of his life, even as you playfully nudge his shoulder and mutter, “Shut up.”

He chuckles along with you, looking back down into his glass as a sigh falls from his lips, and he mumbles more to himself than you, “Not sure I’d be much better, at this point.”

Suddenly, you shift beside him, pulling his attention back to you as you sit up straight. There’s a spark of interest kindling in your eyes, one that makes his throat go dry as your eyes slowly scan over his face, down to his lips.

They part under your attention, and your pupils dilate in the darkness of the room, pulling a soft exhale from Joel’s mouth at the sight of you wanting.

You.

Wanting.

“I don’t know about that,” you murmur as you set your glass down on your coffee table, then do the same with his, tugging it easily from his grasp before leaning in towards him. “But we could find out.”

Joel licks his lips, and you’re on your hands and knees now, crawling towards him on the couch as his eyelids flutter and he rasps out, “I—darlin’, I don’t think I—”

“You don’t want to?” you whisper, stopping instantly at the idea of going too far, and horror rushes through him at the thought of you believing he didn’t want you.

“No, that’s not—” he sighs, rubbing a hand down his face. He exhales heavily into his palm, trying to find the words before he removes it to admit, “I just…don’t think it’d be that enjoyable for ya.”

You scoff, leaning forward to settle on your knees right beside him, fingertips finding the edge of his jawline. They run across it, and Joel’s eyes fall shut, sighing from the sensation of being touched after so long, of it being your hands on his face when you cup his cheeks, thumbs brushing along his cheekbones so softly. 

You stroke his skin like you were holding something delicate, and not a living, breathing instrument of death with the scars to prove it right under your palms.

What did you see in him?

“Joel,” you breathe, and a whimper gets caught in his throat, his eyes blinking back open, struggling to refocus on you under the heavy heat of the moment. “Do you want to?”

He doesn’t have to think twice, doesn’t even want to as his voice comes out in a hoarse whisper, a desperate beg of, “Yes.”

Your lips are on his then, and his hand finds the small of your back, tugging you into him as he groans into the mouth he’s been dreaming of, day and night, for months on end.

Joel tries to be gentle with it, but it feels so fucking good, and God, now his hands are shaking. He has to grip onto your waist tightly to anchor himself to the moment, to remind himself that you’re there. This isn’t one of his vivid daydreams, or images that taunt him in his sleep that he’ll wake up painfully hard from.

No, you’re here, lips pliable and just as wanting as his when his tongue tentatively traces the shape of them, knowing the curve of your mouth from long stolen glimpses even with his eyes closed, even through just the touch of his lips to them alone. 

Your mouth opens eagerly, and he licks into it, moans deeply into the sweet taste of you. His hand slides up your back to cup your neck, fingers tangling into the back of your hair as he tugs you forward by the waist until you’re settled in his lap, so he can wrap you up and pull you into him completely.

When your lips leave his, he tries to chase them with a whine stuck in the back of his throat, and he can feel that pretty smile pressed to his skin when you kiss along his bearded jaw and down the strength of his neck as it strains under your attention. 

Joel’s head falls back, sinking into the couch with the feeling of your lips descending, until there’s a sweet bite of pain that pulls his lips apart. It tugs a throaty grunt straight from the pit of heat building in his lower stomach, his hips bucking up hard into your own.

His hands are clutching your waist, the sweet syllables of your name pouring from his mouth like a prayer. The sound of his desperation, his need for you vibrates against your lips as you suck a mark on his neck, your tongue flattening against it and pulling another weak bucking up of his hips.

Your head lifts, gazing down at him with lidded eyes and a giddy smile at this mountain of a man you’d pulled apart and wrapped around your finger so easily, before you tap that very finger against the same spot on your own neck.

Joel’s jaw drops.

“I—sweetheart, I—”

He can’t find the words, can’t explain how he’s afraid he’s far too rough to do such a thing. It’s been too long, he’s out of practice, and the last thing he wants is to hurt you.

You just smile down at what he leaves unspoken, some look in your eyes that makes him tremble as you brush your hands through his hair and whisper, “You’re capable of much more softness than you realize, Joel Miller.”

A warmth eases his concern at your words, and he lets you guide his face to your neck, his lips finding your skin for a tentative kiss there. You’re putting yourself in his hands now, trusting him not to break you, just as he trusts you to lead him through this forgotten territory until it was familiar to him again.

Joel breathes you in, large hands grasping at your back as he pulls your body firmly against his, tongue darting out to taste your skin before he bites down softly.

There’s a moan that floats from your lips then, the most sweet, seductive music to his ears that’ll replay in his mind for nights to come, and Joel sucks at the skin, eager to leave his mark on you as you did him. He’s grasping desperately at your body now as you grind down into his lap, unwilling to ever let you go now that he has you.

Heavy breaths fill the air as you bring his face back up to yours, and you just kiss. Lips swelling from the attention, and Joel never wants to stop, even though he knows he’ll have to eventually.

When he does, the two of you finally needing to actually catch your breath, your forehead rests against his with a quiet sigh. It sounds dangerously like contentment, and it takes a moment before Joel realizes that such a thing isn’t so dangerous anymore.

Your nose bumps against his, and he whispers hoarsely, “How was that?”

You laugh, sounding just as breathless and raspy as him, and he can’t stop the goofy smile that stretches across his face when you hum, “Mm, I’ll need more evidence before I draw any conclusions.”

Joel’s lips meet yours again, a softer kiss shared this time, leaving the promise of more that he’d never thought he’d be able to make before he pulls back, and your smile returning his own tells him all he’s ever needed to know.

“That can be arranged.”

[hannieehaee]

PINK IN THE NIGHT

18+ / mdi

summary: you were like forbidden fruit for joshua; simply unattainable. no matter how much he wanted you, he knew you were jeonghan's. but what joshua didn't seem to realize was that his best friend was more than happy to share.

content: bf!jeonghan x reader, bf'sbestfriend!joshua x reader, cucking, afab reader, jeonghan's just rlly happy to see his two fave people together (in any and every context), voyeurism, poly dynamics, oral (m and f receiving), penetrative sex, etc.

wc: 8.5k

a/n: thank u to everyone who showed interest in this fic when i first brought it up i hope u guys enjoy!!

masterlist | kofi/patreon

support me through a one time tip<3

Joshua wasn't sure how much more he would take.

From the moment he had seen his best friend walk into the room with you by his side, he knew he was done for.

Granted, that had been the first time he had ever met Jeonghan's girlfriend, but all it had taken was one simple look for his ability to reason to completely leave him.

He wasn't sure what it had been. Maybe it was the confident grin on your face (one matching with that of Jeonghan's), or maybe the pretty dress you were wearing. Perhaps it was how affectionate you seemed towards Jeonghan (a trait that always drew Joshua to women). Or maybe it was just a bit of everything. He hadn't needed to get to know you, or even hear the sound of your voice before deciding he was infatuated by you. You were just his type.

His belief of you being tailored specifically for his liking was further confirmed upon Jeonghan's introduction of the two of you. Your personality just went with Joshua's perfectly. The two of you even shared a myriad of common interests, with the main one sadly being Jeonghan. Amidst his interest in you, Joshua had to keep it clear in his mind that you were spoken for. You were Jeonghan's, and that was something he just needed to respect.

Despite that having been your first meeting, Joshua had been made aware of your existence months in advance. It had been during a period of time when Joshua was away for individual promotions that you and Jeonghan had first met and eventually started dating. Joshua heard a lot about you through the phone and through text, but had been the last member to actually meet you. From Jeonghan's multiple accounts, you seemed like the perfect match for his unpredictable and slick-tongued friend. Upon meeting you, this description was thoroughly confirmed. Not only did your angelic appearance match that of Jeonghan's, but your peculiar personality was almost the same as his best freind's (and his too). You truly checked all boxes for the perfect partner for Jeonghan, and unfortunately, for Joshua too.

Now, it all could've been perfect had his pesky feelings not gotten in the way. What he had at first assumed to be simple physical infatuation was later confirmed to be actual emotional feelings. The more the got to know you, the more he liked you. And sadly for Joshua, he spent way more time with you than he would've liked.

Jeonghan was truly a family man in every sense of the word. There was nothing he loved and valued more than his family, as they were his drive in life. To him, family meant anyone he held close in his heart; meaning his actual family, you, and his members. Since Joshua had officially taken the role of Jeonghan's best friend many years ago, it was just common sense to assume that Jeonghan would pair the two of you up quite often in order to hang out with two of his favorite people. However, there were times in which it got a bit ridiculous.

For instance, a few weeks back when there had not been enough space in the car driving you to the airport and Jeonghan suggested you sit on Joshua's lap, saying something about how he was too weak to take any amount of weight on his lap for such an extended period of time. Now, that had to be out of the ordinary for a guy to do with his friend and girlfriend, right? Having your best friend hold your girl so close to him – on his lap – while she bounced every so often due to the commotion of the vehicle? That had to be considered at least eighty types of strange. Not only was it torture for Joshua to become overly familiar with the floral scent coming from your pretty hair pressed against his torso (how in the hell did you know what his favorite scent was?), but the feeling of having you snuggly in his arms also didn't help.

Another instance had been one in which the three of you went out while Seventeen was touring in Japan. It had all been fine and dandy until he'd noticed the necklace you were wearing. It was matching with the one Jeonghan had given him a few weeks prior, except he had told Joshua it was meant to be a friendship necklace. Looking over at Jeonghan, he realized there was no necklace on his neck. Had he bought the three of you matching necklaces but forgotten to wear his own? Joshua could've believed this thought, except this had not been the first time Jeonghan had 'forgotten' something like this. Just a few weeks back he had realized your phone case was matching yet another one of Jeonghan's identical gifts to him, all while Jeonghan had his usual phone case. When questioned about it, Jeonghan simply shrugged and claimed he forgot, insisting in getting a picture of you and Joshua with your matching items while you coo'd at the cute 'coincidence'.

However, these simple mismatches were not the worst of it, no. The worst of it had come in the form of his very affectionate friend translating his own affections towards you and Joshua. Instead of him being the one sharing his affections, he would often decide that he wanted the two of you to be touchy with one another. Joshua wasn't sure how he fell for it every single time. His friend would be cuddling you on the couch while Joshua unsuspectedly watched a movie with the two of you, only to find himself pressed up against you two by the end of the night. Jeonghan was a sneaky and calculated man. If he wanted you and Joshua cuddling, then he would get it without even having to ask. In other instances, he would somehow manage to get the three of you holding hands as you strutted about on the streets of whichever city you were located in at the moment (Did he mention that Jeonghan also liked to take you on tour with them?), with you always being in the middle of the two.

What Joshua didn't understand was why exactly Jeonghan was so willing to share you with him. Granted, none of your interactions were impure by any means, but they were always just a little too much. Joshua had only known you for a few months, and although he was your friend, he found himself being way more physically affectionate with you than he was with any other friends of his (sans his members, of course). Except it all felt natural to him. Jeonghan had somehow managed to condition both you and Joshua to feel extreme comfort around each other; enough to never question Jeonghan's antics when it involved the two of you.

You certainly never seemed to mind Joshua constantly third wheeling you and your boyfriend. At times, Joshua even felt like you were the one who wanted him around. You'd constantly throw him flirty smiles (or at least that's what he liked to believe), you'd never hesitate to engage in whatever antics Jeonghan pulled you into (whether it was a matching hoodie that Jeonghan seemingly forgot to wear yet again or hand holding across the streets of Japan), you'd excitedly text the groupchat Jeonghan had made.

All signs pointed towards you being completely content with the situation. This was yet another part of your dynamic with his best friend that made his brain beat at itself looking for answers. Did the two of you know about his feelings? Was this just an overly dragged-out ruse fabricated by Jeonghan in order to prank him? He knew his friend to be a bit of a weirdo when it came to his shenanigans (it was part of his charm, truly), but he also knew he'd never outwardly try and humiliate Joshua like that, so it was very unlikely that this whole thing had begun with that intention. Maybe his best friend simply adored being with both you and him, making him always pair you up to maximize the time he spent with the two of you. That's what Joshua decided to go with, at least. His only issue was that he was unsure of how long he could keep his feelings for you at bay, specially with the constant proximity between you and him.

This was yet another excursion Seventeen would be taking to Japan in the form of a short tour of the country. It was also yet another instance in which Jeonghan had chosen to take you with them. Your job never had a tendency of getting in the way, so Jeonghan always took the liberty of inviting you to tag along, something neither his members nor the staff ever seemed to have a problem with. After all, you were like a little extension of Jeonghan by then; you were attached to the hip.

Although nowadays it was rare for members to share rooms, it had been decided a while back that diving the rooms into groups of two would optimize their safety; something about being more inconspicuous when checking in at the hotel by reserving less rooms. This meant that Joshua would be yet again paired up with Jeonghan, and by extension you. Joshua didn't mind this arrangement thus far. It had only occurred on two other instances by then, and both had been relatively chill sans the one time he walked in on the two of you making out (You pulled away upon noticing him, sheepishly chuckling an apology). That instance had made Joshua become addicted to the sound of your soft breath as your lips smacked against those of his best friend. He felt perverted for having this thought, but he couldn't help but relive the memory of your pliant form against Jeonghan's as he gave you the simple pleasure of a kiss.

Other than that, any and every stay in the same room had been completely calm. Surprisingly enough, the two of you never got up to any suspicious deeds while he was around. The three of you actually rarely stayed indoors while out of the country, opting instead for going out together. That had been the case for this occasion also, except that things had gone slightly differently this time.

Despite the vast size of the room, Joshua could still hear and see everything you and Jeonghan may have been up to. The darkness of the room was not enough to shield his eyes (and specially not his ears) from the familiar sound of your lips sucking and macking against each other. He could hear the soft breaths in between your kisses, and could also take in the quiet moans you released while kissing his friend.

It was the middle of the night when Joshua had woken up from his slumber due to the ruffling of sheets next to his bed. And now he found himself quietly listening in on the fondling you and Jeonghan were currently engaged in, completely unaware that he was awake.

"H- hannie ... No .. What if he hears?", you'd breathed out, words being periodically interrupted by yet another kiss from Jeonghan.

"Shh .. He won't. He wouldn't mind anyway. Who would? You sound so pretty, angel ..."

The kissing got heavier after that. He could hear the sheets shuffle even more, with your shadowy figures allowing him to figure out that your current position was that of Jeonghan fully hovering above you as he dragged his hips against yours. Joshua wasn't sure if it was just dry humping or actual penetration, but your pretty whines had him growing hard either way.

"Hannie ... Fuck ... Please."

"Gonna beg for me now? Gonna beg for me while my best friend is right here? Oh, angel, you're so filthy ..."

"J- just don't stop. Wanna cum, please ..." your breathy voice had Joshua growing even more lightheaded.

"Already? Angel's been wanting me all day, huh? Or is it him? Did you want him around? Does it turn you on that he could wake up any moment and see what a desperate little bunny you are?"

Oh, fuck.

Joshua wasn't sure how to feel about the fact that Jeonghan's dirty talk was getting to him, but the contents of his words had him spiraling. Had you mentioned Joshua to him before? Is that why he brought him up? There was no way this was the first time he had come up in conversation. Specially considering your response to the question.

"Y- yes! Want him to see .. Hannie! Fuck ..."

Your whines had still been simple quiet murmurs in order to maintain the peace and quiet of the room, but Joshua had still been able to hear your answer loud and clear.

You wanted him to know. You wanted him to see you falling apart. Maybe just as badly as he wanted to watch you.

"Oh, bunny ... What a filthy girl you are. Then cum for me, yeah? Show me how desperate you are for Joshuji to see you fall apart."

Both you and Jeonghan seemed to find your release after that, with Jeonghan burying his face in your neck as he muffled his groans of pleasure, and you doing the same. But Joshua had heard it all anyway. He had heard every single whimper and cry of pleasure from both parties involved, and now his dick was aching for release. It had taken him herculean effort to not hump against the bed at every movement he caught from his corner of the room. Now he was stuck continuing to pretend he was asleep as he heard the two of you still softly kiss each other as you shared sweet words before slumber took over you.

Somehow Joshua managed to fall asleep despite the uncomfortable boner you'd both provoked. The next morning had been a bit awkward, however. Upon waking up and walking over to the built-in kitchen in the hotel room, he found you leaning against the counter as you drank some coffee. You were wearing something that was clearly meant to make Joshua's pre-existing problem even worse – a tiny tank top paired by tiny shorts, with your nipples poking right through it. Wearing such skimpy clothing around Joshua didn't seem to bother you, seeing as you had no reaction to him seeing you like that.

Just like last night, this was sort of a first. You usually had the tendency of covering up more whenever Joshua was around. It was either out of shyness or to keep the goods for your boyfriend's eyes only. Today, though, you were quite nonchalant about it. Jeonghan too, as he simply smirked at his friend the moment he walked in, landing a quick peck to your lips before offering Joshua a coffee of his own.

The air had been weird that morning, almost as if the two of you had been teasing him. But Joshua was 100% certain the two of you would not have continued your antics if you'd actually believed he had been awake. I mean, the two of you wouldn't even kiss much while he was around. It just didn't add up.

"So, Shua, any plans for today?," it was Jeonghan who interrupted his thoughts, now with his arms wrapped around you as he stood behind you, face buried in your neck as if Joshua wasn't even there.

"Are we off today?"

"Yeah. We have the next three days off due to the weather. Probably gonna have to stay indoors as much as we can too."

"Oh, uh. I'll go see the sights, maybe. Give you guys some time to yourselves."

That got your attention.

"What? No! You can always hang with us, Joshua, you know that."

As much as the sweet words touched him, he needed to not look you in the eye too much for a bit. He needed to clear his head from the pretty sounds that had left your mouth last night; sounds that were now on replay in his head.

"It's fine. Told Seokmin and Mingyu I'd go to this one cafe they'd been meaning to check out. I'll see you guys later today though?"

He'd finished his coffee by now, opting to wash his cup before he headed over to the bathroom to get ready.

"Boooo! Fine. You can go, Joshuji. We'll find fun on our own. Right, bunny?", the smirk seemed glued to his face, just like his body seemed glued to you. Joshua knew Hannie to be affectionate, but he never really rubbed it in his face like this. Yeah, he really needed the day off from being with the happy couple.

He ignored Jeonghan in favor of going to get ready for his day. Within less than an hour he was bidding his goodbyes to the two of you, texting Seokmin that he was on his way to their shared room. Along with Mingyu and Wonwoo, the three headed out for the day, allowing Joshua a short-lived distraction from your alluring presence.

He came back to the hotel later than expected. Most of his day had been spent outdoors despite of the unfavorable weather. The atmosphere was nice regardless, so he just let the day drag on as he spent time with his friends.

It wasn't until around 9pm that he headed back to the hotel with his friends. They went their separate ways upon arriving, with each going to their respective rooms. Joshua arrived to his shared hotel room, not paying much mind to anything as he walked in. Except the sight in front of him stopped him on his tracks immediately.

Neither of you had spotted him when he first walked in. Your minds were clearly taken up by your current activity. You were facing away from the door, with your head facing down as Jeonghan's dick invaded your mouth. Jeonghan was sitting on the couch which was facing the direction of the door Joshua had just walked through, except his eyes were closed and his head thrown back. His hands were buried in your hair as he lightly pushed your face further against his crotch. The sounds of your gagging and gargling were overly filthy, making Joshua gulp at both the sound and the sight. Jeonghan's angelic moans of your name surprisingly didn't help Joshua's situation either. He found himself turned on by the sight of both you and his best friend.

It didn't take long for Jeonghan to spot Joshua as he stood frozen by the entrance. The moment Jeonghan opened his eyes, Joshua knew he was absolutely fucked. Except his friend didn't seem surprised to find him standing there, but more so pleased to see him. He threw him a smirk and began to play up his antics without once stopping your movements to inform you of Joshua's arrival.

"Oh, bunny ... Such a pretty thing, shit ... Taking my cock like the angel you are."

He began to grind against your mouth, almost full on fucking it. Joshua could hear your muffled moans against his dick from where he stood. Despite Jeonghan's sultry gaze on him, he couldn't look away, although his eyes were mostly glued to your form.

"Angel ... Gonna make me cum. Fuck, you take my cock so well, angel. Gonna swallow for me? Hmm? Gonna be good?"

You disconnected yourself from him, now licking and kissing at his tip as Jeonghan's eyes rolled back, head falling against the couch as his eyes finally left Joshua's.

"Please, Hannie ... Want your cum. Fuck my mouth? Need it so bad."

Oh, you filthy thing. Joshua had to hold back in groaning at your words. What he wouldn't give to be in Jeonghan's spot right now. He would've had to make you cum with his mouth at least three times before letting you get on your knees for him. He knew that the moment you even gave him the green light he'd be cumming in his pants. It had been months of wanting you, and the past few days in which you'd been hanging around in skimpy clothing while being overly affectionate with his best friend had gotten him extremely pent up (re: it had only been two days, but that was more than enough for Joshua). You just had this special effect on him.

As much as Joshua didn't want to admit it, the fact that you were taken by Jeonghan of all people made him want you even more. There was just something so hot about the concept of sharing you with his best friend. This thought might've explained why Joshua was almost salivating at the sight of you worshiping his best friend's cock in front of him.

"F- fuck, angel! That's it ... Take it all ... Swallow like the obedient little bunny you are ..."

It hadn't taken Jeonghan too long after that to become limp against the couch, almost forgetting about Joshua's presence. You were still seemingly clueless about him having seen the whole show.

Jeonghan made you sit on his lap after that, running his hands up and down your back and ass as your thong-covered ass faced Joshua at the perfect angle to admire the entirety of your almost fully-nude back. He squeezed and caressed at every part Joshua could only ever dream of touching.

"Let me take you to sleep, huh, baby? Need to keep your energy so I can fuck you all day tomorrow too, yeah?"

You nodded and kissed him, seemingly getting lost in the kiss immediately after, moaning and sighing against his lips as he continued to feel you up. Somehow Jeonghan managed to lead you to bed right after that, never allowing you to spot Joshua as he cleared the area for his friend to finally walk in without you realizing he had been there the whole time. Jeonghan gave Joshua a wink before Joshua finally managed to sneak into the restroom to take care of his newfound problem.

As Joshua hurriedly finished himself off as quietly as he could, knowing you were likely asleep already, he knew he was thoroughly and completely fucked.

The following morning, you were gone before he had woken up. It was just him and Jeonghan in the room now.

Joshua tentatively walked up to the island located in the small kitchen of the hotel room. Jeonghan was already leaning against it, absentmindedly eating some cereal as Joshua avoided his gaze. Upon sitting across from his view, however, Joshua felt the need to bring up what had happened last night.

"Han, listen. I'm so so-"

"Did you like it?"

He'd asked it so casually as he continued chomping on his cereal, usual look of amusement on his face.

"Did I ... like it?"

"Yeah. Did you like watching my girlfriend suck me off?"

"It was an accident, I had no idea you guys would be doing that when I walked in. You had all day for that. Why would you do it when you knew I'd be coming back? You-"

"Oh? Did I force you to stand there and watch, Joshuji? Did I hold you hostage as you salivated over my girlfriend as she gagged on my dick?", Jeonghan let out an incredulous chuckle, "Did I make you watch that other night while you pretended to sleep as I fucked her?"

Oh. He ... He knew about that?

"Han, listen, I-"

"So did you like it or not? Do you like watching my girlfriend?"

He might as well come out with it. He was well acquainted with his friend's stubborn nature. There was no reason to go in circles about it, specially now that he knew that Jeonghan had been aware of him being awake while the two of you had sex the other night.

"Yes. I .. I liked it."

"Huh. Didn't think you'd admit it that easily."

"There's more," he began before being interrupted by Jeonghan yet again.

"I know. You like her. Don't you?"

He was quite nonchalant as he said it. It unnerved Joshua like crazy. He knew his best friend to be pretty odd, but there was just no way he could be so calm about finding out his best friend was crushing on his girlfriend, was there? It wasn't like you were just some disposable fling either; Joshua knew how much Jeonghan loved you.

"How– Jeonghan, man, I'm sorry. I don't know how it happened. I never meant for it to escalate to this. I thought it was just some schoolgirl crush that I'd get over in a few weeks, but the weeks became months and ... yeah. I'm sorry. I'd never actually act up on it, you know that. You're my best friend and I like to think she's my friend too. I .. I don't know what to say. I'm sorry. Again."

Through the entirety of Joshua's speech, his best friend kept his disinterested stare as he continued to eat at his cereal. It hadn't sounded like the crush was news to Jeonghan either. It seemed like he had just been waiting for Joshua to finally fess up.

"Joshua, stop", he put his cereal down before coming closer to him, "I'm not mad. And neither is she."

"She knows?!"

He chuckled at this, "I mean, you're not exactly discreet. It was kinda funny actually. You're usually pretty smooth. Except with her, of course."

"What the hell is happening right now?"

"Okay, sit. I'll explain."

Jeonghan gestured for a very exasperated Joshua to take a seat on the chair right across from him, putting the cereal aside to give him his entire attention. He was also still wondering where you had gone this morning. Jeonghan seemed to read his mind as he absentmindedly looked back towards the bed you'd been lying on just last night.

"She went out with Boo. You don't have to worry about her coming back right now," he interjected, "Anyways. Yes. I know. Well, we know you like Y/N. We also, uh, knew you were awake that day ... That's kinda why we did it ...," for once Jeonghan showed an ounce of sheepishness at his own words.

So you'd done it on purpose? Joshua's mind was spinning by now. He was beyond embarrassed but also extremely intrigued by what was being revealed to him.

"You .. Why?"

"Joshua, listen. I've known about your crush on my girlfriend since you first met her. If it were anyone else, I'd probably hate it, but for some reason since it's you, I ... I don't seem to mind it. I don't know why that is."

"You're okay with it?"

"Let's say yeah. Let's say I don't mind. Let's say ... let's say I like it."

"You what?"

"It shouldn't come as a surprise to you. Do you think I'd let anyone else see my girlfriend walk around almost naked and say nothing? Or that I'd make it so you two touch each other all the time – even if it's purely innocent?"

Holy fuck.

"Wait. You've been doing all this on purpose? I thought you were just teasing me. Did you .. Do you want me to have her ?"

He knew it was a stupid way to pose the question, but all signs indicated towards Jeonghan wanting to push you straight into his arms. What other reason could there be for Jeonghan's actions; actions he had just claimed had been purposeful and out of his own liking. Joshua always knew Jeonghan to share and gift things to his younger brothers, but you had not been a gift he was expecting.

Jeonghan let out an incredulous chuckle yet again, confusing Joshua even further.

"I'd never just give away my angel. What I'm saying is ... I can let you play with her, but under my rules."

"P– play? Play how?"

"You're a smart guy, Joshuji, get imaginative."

"Does she .."

"Yeah. She's interested, trust me," there was amusement in his eyes, almost as if thinking back to some previous conversation he'd had with you.

As much as Joshua craved you, there was no way he could just ... have you like that. You were his best friend's girl, and you were also his friend.

"Han, I could never have ... sex with your girlfriend. You're my best friend, I ..."

"C'mon, Joshuji. Don't you wanna scratch that itch? She's been waiting for you, you know. Ever since I told her you liked her. She's been wanting you to break. And so have I. There's no harm."

"What's in it for you?", he couldn't believe he was about to agree with this proposition.

"I ... I get to watch my pretty angel be taken care of. I get to know that despite all this she's all mine and she'll do anything I want for me, always", Jeonghan's eyes began to darken at the thoughts seemingly running through his mind, his breath getting heavier just at the thought, "I get to have her every night afterwards, knowing she'd be plaguing yours."

Joshua was embarrassed, but he understood. If he had you, he'd also wanna hold you as temptation.

"So what do you say?", he finally awoke from his short-lived trance.

Joshua couldn't believe himself right now, but the lust he'd been feeling for you for months took over and he found himself agreeing.

"Yes."

Apparently Jeonghan had already made arrangements with you for later that night. He had been so confident he could convince Joshua to agree that he had already given you the green light, and well, he had been right. It had not taken Joshua too many mental gymnastics to know he wanted to have you somehow. He wasn't sure what this would mean for your future friendship, but that was something he'd worry about later.

For now, he was losing his mind.

A few hours after his conversation with Jeonghan, he had been asked by the man himself to wait inside the restroom in order to 'give you some time to prepare.' He was yet to see you at all today, which made him even more anxious. He could hear the two of you talking and giggling through the door, though he couldn't quite make out what you were saying.

Suddenly the door was opened, with a Yoon Jeonghan grinning mischievously at Joshua, gesturing for him to come out. Upon re-entering the bedroom area of the hotel room, he saw you on the bed.

You looked utterly angelic, sitting on your knees above the bed, very light makeup on and soft white lingerie. Had anyone asked him, he would've thought you were an angel. You looked far too beautiful for any man to resist.

His eyes stayed glued to your soft gaze as Jeonghan guided him to get on the bed with you. What he wasn't really expecting (although thinking back, he should've), was for Jeonghan to get on the bed too. You were all now facing each other on the bed, no words spoken as you stared at one another. Both him and Jeonghan matched your almost undressed state, donning only a pair of boxers and a thin tank top each.

"Joshuji ... Doesn't she look beautiful? Hmm? Got all pretty for you."

Oh. Had you dressed up for him? He should've known. You looked like you'd come straight out of one of his dreams. He always loved when you wore light and soft colors. You always looked so pretty and innocent like that.

"Y– yeah ... She looks so– "

"Say it to her, Joshuji," Jeonghan's hand had reached out to lightly caress your skin, running a finger up and down your thigh.

"You look like a dream", said Joshua while staring directly into your eyes.

You gave him a soft smile, daring hand reaching out to touch his knee as his breath caught in his throat.

"Thank you, Joshie ... Hope I didn't scare you with all this. Hannie told me he caught you off guard this morning," Jeonghan chuckled at this.

"N– no, it's okay. I ... I've wanted you too .. It's mutual, I promise."

You suddenly reached out to caress his cheek, catching him off guard for a moment before he allowed himself to lean into your touch, "Yeah? I know, Joshie ... You like me too, huh? Hannie told me. It was so cute seeing you scramble every time. But it's okay now, right? Now we can all play .."

The eyes you gave him as you said it had him gulping. His usually confident demeanor always disappeared with you around, specially now. It also didn't help that he could see his friend's smirk on his peripheral.

"Wanna play, Joshuji? How do you want her first?"

"Oh, I ...", he had no idea where to start. He felt too surveilled to do anything. There was just too much pressure.

"How about I show you how to treat my angel, hmm? Then you get to have your fun," Hannie interrupted Joshua's thinking.

Jeonghan used his hand to turn your head towards him, leaning in slowly before speaking up again, "This is how she likes to be kissed. Take notes, Joshuji."

He then began kissing you softly, going peck after peck before deepening the kiss. He began to lick at you until you opened your lips for him, sighing when your tongues made contact. In the meantime his hands went up to softly pinch at your nipples through your thin bra, which had you mewling against Jeonghan's lips. The two of you continued to kiss like this for a few minutes, with the kiss eventually evolving into a lewd mess of spit and tongues that would have anyone turning their gaze away. But not Joshua. Joshua intently watched the two of you kiss, waiting for what he hoped would be his turn.

It seemed Jeonghan had read his mind once again, as he pulled away with one last sweet peck to your puckered lips. The two of you gave each other a soft smile before finally turning to Joshua again.

"Did you get that, Joshuji? Wanna try kissing her now?", there was a rare smile on Jeonghan's face as he said this. A mixture of softness and cockiness.

"Oh, I .. I can? I mean, can I?"

"Of course, dummy. That's what you're here for. Go ahead, kiss my angel. Make sure to kiss her right," he gestured to you, making space for the two of you to connect right in front of him.

The two of you were shy about it at first, giving each other timid smiles before Joshua finally closed the gap and kissed you. He let out a breath of relief against your lips before really getting to it. Unlike Jeonghan, whose movements matched yours perfectly (due to being completely in tune with you by now), Joshua was a bit more desperate in the way he kissed you. He whined against your lips as he licked and sucked at both your tongue and lips. You didn't seem to mind, matching his pace as he loved on your lips.

"You're so ... Fuck, you're so pretty," he whispered against your lips.

His hands eventually went up to softly run his thumbs over your nipples, more slowly than Jeonghan had. He immediately drank in any moans or whimpers you let out at his actions. With half a mind to begin hovering over you, giving you all of him, he hesitantly pulled away. Joshua was certain that if he kissed you more without actually getting to fuck you, he would embarrassingly cum in his pants in front of both you and his best friend.

"Liked it, Joshuji? My bunny's just so pretty, isn't she? Addictive. Can't blame you for having wanted her for this long."

There was still mockery in his voice, but Joshua didn't mind as long as it meant this could keep going.

"What else ... what else can I do?", he dared himself to ask.

"Oh? getting a little brave there, Joshuji. I'm gonna have her first. Then you get to have your fun."

Joshua felt slightly strange at the concept of watching the two of you have sex, but he was also coming to find out that he found it incredibly hot to see the two of you touch each other. The sight of you sucking Jeonghan's dick the night prior had not left his mind for a single moment.

Jeonghan went to sit behind you, making you recline against him as he made a show of taking off your underwear. He dragged down your panties, bringing them up to his face to inhale the scent, throwing Joshua a satisfied smirk as he then threw them out of reach. After that, he removed your bra, playing with your tits as Joshua watched with a thirsty look on his face.

"Come closer, Joshuji. She loves being touched here. Kiss her tits a bit. She goes crazy over it."

"Hannie!", you complained, face flushing at his comment.

"What? He needs to know your weak spots, baby. Want him to make you feel good, bunny."

Joshua ignored your banter as he scoot closer to you, lowering his head to your tits as he kissed and licked at them. Your hands came out pretty quickly to hold his head against your tits, whining at the way he devoured them like a starved man. In the meantime, Hannie decided to take it upon himself to finger you, causing your cries of pleasure to fill up the room. At some point Joshua removed his tank top and began to kiss your lips once more, inciting your hands to begin feeling up his chest.

Behind you, the devil whispered in your ear, "You like him, bunny? Like how big and strong he is for you? Gonna take such good care of you, aren't you Joshuji?"

"Y- yes. Gonna give her everything she wants," it was easy for Joshua to fall into a trance while kissing you, specially the moment your hands went south, now softly playing with his dick under his boxers.

He moaned at your touch, sighing against your lips as the kiss became too filthy in nature. In the meantime, Jeonghan made sure to kiss at the weak spots of your neck, hands still playing with your pussy. Joshua drank in every moan that his friend pulled out of you, giving you back moans of his own as you played with his cock. The kiss broke soon after, with Joshua throwing his head back and closing his eyes at the pleasure.

Eventually he felt some movement on the bed, causing him to open his eyes. Upon opening them, he had noticed the two of you changing positions, somehow without your hand ever disconnecting from his aching dick. You were now on your hands and knees above the bed, with Jeonghan kneeling behind you. Hannie made a show of kissing at your cheeks as he stared down at Joshua. Immediately after, he entered you, groaning at what Joshua knew must've been the greatest feeling allowed on Earth.

"Oh, Joshuji ... You have no idea how good my angel feels ... My pretty angel ... Prettiest thing I've ever had, shit."

Jeonghan's words about you were almost enough to make him cum. That, and the way your hands tightened around him at the feeling of your boyfriend entering you. The moment Hannie began to cant his hips against yours, you threw Joshua a lustful look, questioning if it was okay to take his dick into your mouth.

"Please ... You can do anything ... You don't have to ask, just– fuck!"

You did not need much confirmation, taking him into your mouth the moment he showed any type of affirmation and getting straight to work. Joshua commended Jeonghan in his brain, knowing he must've trained your pretty lips to take him so well that Joshua almost felt like passing out at the way you expertly worked him with your mouth.

You were an absolute dream, and Joshua was unsure of how in hell you were even real and in bed with him right now.

His and Jeonghan's moans filled the room, though for different reasons. Joshua was overcome by the pleasure of your mouth while Jeonghan groaned at the feeling of you wrapped around him. Simultaneously, you whined against Joshua's dick at the way Hannie pushed his hips towards yours. The increase of your moans let Joshua know that you were likely almost at your end. Opening his eyes once more to look at Jeonghan, he noticed that his hand had dipped, likely now playing with your clit as he fucked you. He could tell the two of you were about to cum, and to be frank, so was he. The context of the situation alone had him delirious with pleasure. Something about you sucking his dick while his best friend fucked you was just so hot and intimate to Joshua. His best friend and the girl he'd been lusting after for months ... He'd have to unpack all this at some point, but for now, he let his orgasm take over his thoughts.

The three of you came at very similar times, allowing you all to catch your breaths before continuing onto whatever else Jeonghan had in mind. He seemed to be in charge anyways.

Jeonghan immediately moved as close to you as possible, sitting behind you while you sat opposite of Joshua. His hands played absentmindedly with you once more while his eyes were set on his friend, a smirk glued to his face.

"D'dya like it, Joshuji? Like how my pretty angel felt? She was so good for you, wasn't she? My beautiful bunny ... Just wait til you feel her cunt ... Her gorgeous, perfect cunt", as he complimented you, his eyes grew heavy, leaving Joshua's to instead focus on you. His hands grew frantic as he felt you up while ignoring Joshua's presence.

Jeonghan grew too lustful for you. It seemed like this was a regular occurrence – Jeonghan losing his train of thought due to your close proximity; unable to concentrate when your body drew him in so easily. Joshua understood completely. His eyes were equally as heavy as he stared at his friend make out with you once more. He also wanted the privilege of doing whatever he wanted to you at any given time; a privilege held by Jeonghan only.

Finally, Jeonghan's reasoning came back and he gave you one last peck before turning to Joshua again, "Sorry. Can't help myself around my angel."

"Hannie, we shouldn't ignore Joshie. He's been so good too," your soft voice cut in.

"Yeah? He was good for you, angel? Like how he kissed you? How his cock felt in your mouth. Why don't you thank him? Show him what a good boy he's been for you," it was as if a permanent grin was glued to his face, careless to how shy you seemed to get at his depraved questions.

Regardless, you moved closer to Joshua, sheepishly asking for permission to lean against his lap. He, like any reasonable man, gave you enthusiastic consent, choosing to pull you all the way on his lap and trapping you in a heated kiss. There was no way for him to help himself, he'd just grown far too desperate for you. The constant promise of your cunt had him going crazy by now.

"Oh? Joshuji taking control, huh? C'mon, you can do better than that. Feel her up. Give her everything you have ... Fuck her."

Both you and Joshua froze at that last statement, disconnecting your lips as you turned back to look at him.

"Hannie .. ? Are you sure? I–"

He scoot closer to you, giving you a peck despite you being twisted at an awkward angle and still on Joshua's lap, arms wrapped around him.

"Of course, angel. Want you two to feel good. You're all mine anyways, aren't you?" he gave you a more heated kiss this time, not caring for Joshua's close proximity.

"Yes, Hannie. All yours ..." you breathed against his lips as he pulled away.

Joshua didn't say anything throughout the exchange. His eyes were simply frozen at a widened state and his mind blank. He had assumed that Jeonghan had been playing it up by bringing up the tempting subject that was your cunt to him as he fucked you, likely just teasing something that Joshua would never been able to have. Joshua had been wrong. He was building up for the final act; the moment in which Joshua would get to fuck you while he watched.

Not too much time after and Joshua was lying down on the bed with you on top of him, both of you fully naked. Jeonghan was sitting nearby with the perfect view of your body. He had offhandedly mentioned that he wanted to see you. That he was fine with Joshua being the giver of your pleasure, but that his desire ultimately fell on seeing you in the throes of passion. Joshua was fine with this. Although the concept of being watched enticed him, his main focus was on the immense pleasure he was intending to give you as soon as you gave him the green light. Which you did while he was trapped in his thoughts, completely catching him off guard.

At first he was ashamed at the loud moan he let out at you sinking down on him, but the thought immediately left him upon his brain processing the tightness of your cunt. For a fleeting second he imagined what it would've been like to fuck you raw in the same way that Jeonghan had done just moments prior, but Jeonghan had been adamant on him wearing a condom, claiming that his dick was the only one with the privilege of being suffocated by your cunt unfiltered. The logic made sense, but Joshua's envy wasn't soothed by logic.

Putting these thoughts aside, his mind went straight back to your cunt. Your beautiful moans and the contortions of your face while in pleasure were high contenders in his list of priorities right now. You were a literal angel above him. The bounce of your breasts and the way your hands guided his own to play with them had him whining at you.

"You're so beautiful ... Feel so fucking good, fuck. Hannie was right, you're an angel ..."

He heard a chuckle (which he ignored) coming from his side.

"Thank you, Joshie– fuck! You're so pretty. So good for me, too. It's nice to have such a good boy for a change."

He chuckled at this, knowing you were probably way too used to Jeonghan's antics. His usual gentleman act was likely a breath of fresh air, and he wanted to perform the part perfectly for you.

However, his body made the choice for him. Despite growing extremely aroused at your bouncing atop him, his body ached for more. Which was why he flipped you over and began pistoning into you like a beast. If your cries and the way you scratched at his chest were anything to go by, he was pretty confident you were enjoying it just as much as he was.

"Gonna make you cum, beautiful. Need you to cum, yeah? I'll be a good boy for you, just ... just cum for me and I'll give you everything," his hand came down to rub at your clit, making you squeeze around him with a mewl.

"Joshie! I'm gonna– Fuck! I'm almost there!"

Along with your moans, the slapping of skin could be heard to his side, with angelic moans accompanying the sound. Looking to the side, Joshua caught sight of his best friend's thrown back head as his hands frantically played with his cock, clearly getting off at the sight of you nearly at your orgasm.

Joshua buried his face in the crook of your neck as he tried to hold back his orgasm until yours arrived. That's when Jeonghan finally interjected.

"Bunny ... Need you to cum for Joshuji, yeah? Be my good bunny and give him your cum, angel."

It seemed like Hannie's orgasm had arrived while Joshua was distracted, as his voice only sounded slightly out of breath and he could no longer hear the slapping of his dick.

"Yes, Hannie .. Gonna– ah! C– cumming! Shit!"

Your orgasm immediately triggered his. Joshua had been holding back, waiting until he could finally fill up the condom Jeonghan had made him slip into. The simple thought of cumming inside you had Joshua's orgasm becoming even more intense despite it being a mere thought. Your moans of his name also didn't help matters, making him continue to grind into you even past your highs. The sensitivity was the only thing that got him to stop, falling limp beside you on the bed.

The three of you laid there breathless for a few beats, rendered too exhausted to do anything.

Jeonghan was the most lucid at the moment, with his orgasm not having been as intense as yours or Joshua's. He grabbed a few wipes from the bedside table and cleaned you up a bit, throwing some clean ones at his friend so he could do the same to himself. But Joshua was too spent to process anything at the moment. It took him a good five minutes to fully catch his breath and sit up to face the happy couple he was currently sharing a bed with.

"So," began Jeonghan, smirk still glued to his face as he cuddled against you, "how was it?"

There really was no way for Joshua to answer that question. His eyes were still glued to your form as you cuddled against his friend. On estimate, Joshua would need about three business days to process what had just happened; the way you were so perfect for him. Inside him he just prayed that this would not be the only time he had you. He'd be okay with not being your boyfriend and simply staying friends. All he wanted was to know that this would happen again and again.

"Joshie?", it was you who interrupted the spiraling of his thoughts, concern laced in your tone, "Are you okay? Did I do something tha– "

"No! Of course not," he immediately went to stretch his arm so you could hold hands, "I ... It was perfect. You were perfect. It's just ..."

"You want her again," now was Jeonghan's turn, sounding very confident in his statement, "You want to know if this will ever happen again. Am I right?"

All he could do was sheepishly nod. He wasn't sure why he felt ashamed at it. The only thing he was certain about was that he wanted this again. All of it. Watching you and Jeonghan together and then being watched by your boyfriend himself. Every detail of it had him burning at the mere thought.

"Don't worry, Joshuji. We like you too much to let you go. Right, angel?"

You nodded enthusiastically, pretty grin on your face, "Yes, Joshie. Of course you're invited again," you patted the empty side of the bed for him to join you and Jeonghan in cuddling under the covers.

He was hesitant in accepting it, but he still found himself cuddling up against you, enjoying the warmth of your hold as Jeonghan cuddled up on the other side of you.

This was all slightly unconventional, but he could get used to it. After all, you were his two favorite people.

To read short 2.4k word continuation u can go join my monthly tier on kofi or patreon!

content: dry humping, cum eating, oral (f receiving), etc.

wc: 434 (teaser); 2402 (full drabble)

sneak peak:

It had only been a few days since that day.

You know, the day in which Jeonghan had allowed Joshua to defile you to his liking. The day Joshua discovered a kink he had apparently kept hidden away. The day you had laid under him so prettily as he rammed into you with everything he had. Yeah, that day.

Joshua was sure he was going insane. Neither you nor Jeonghan had made much mention of the events of that day other than a suggestion of doing it again sometime. That vague proposition just wasn't enough for Joshua. Not when all he could see when he closed his eyes was you (and occasionally the image of Jeonghan fucking you from behind, but the implications of that thought were something Joshua didn't want to explore just yet).

Were you completely unaffected? The two of you were still acting as per usual, being your menacing selves as you remained touchy and attentive to him, but not in a way that could be defined as anything more than platonic (flirty, if you so wished).

Okay, granted, it had only been two days since that night, but had it been up to Joshua, he would've already had you three more times since then. He needed to know where your minds were at, and at this point that meant he'd have to take the reigns, so he decided to design a plan to see if he could land the two of you in bed again as soon as possible.

It was kind of difficult to get you alone. You and Jeonghan were always attached to the hip, which was usually a cute sight to behold, but simply bothersome to Joshua under his current circumstances. It's not like he wanted to take you from Jeonghan. He just knew that talking to you would be easier than to his friend, who Joshua knew would simply try to play mind games with him or somehow make him even more confused.

Finally, after spending almost an entire day exploring Japan with the two of you (holding your hand most of that time), Jeonghan had headed over to shower, leaving you and Joshua alone in the hotel room.

Joshua wasn't sure how to go about this. How could he even bring up the situation without sounding desperate for pussy (which he very much was)? He wanted to have you, but doing it without Jeonghan's presence felt like betrayal. All he needed right now was some sort of sigh that he wasn't insane and that what had happened the other night hadn't been an isolated circumstance.

...

find the 18+ continuation on kofi or patreon!

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[afeelgoodblog]

The Best News of Last Week - 13 November

🦔 - Who knew Attenborough's echidna was just camera-shy?

1. New state law prevents animal abuse offenders from owning pets

The law bans those convicted of animal cruelty, including those involved with dogfighting, from owning any kind of animal for five years after their first criminal offense.

2. A door at a Swedish library was accidentally left open — 446 people came in, borrowed 245 books. Every single one was returned

The library was supposed to be closed for All Saints Day — a celebration sometimes also called All Hallows Day, the precursor of Halloween. But the library staff had forgotten to close a door. So people came in, thinking the library was open. Some visitors realized the library was technically closed and went home, but others did not.

3. Ohio votes to legalize marijuana for adult recreational use, becoming 24th state to do so

Ohio voters approved a measure legalizing recreational marijuana on Tuesday, defying Republican legislative leaders who had failed to pass the proposed law.

Passage of Issue 2 makes Ohio the 24th state to allow adult cannabis use for non-medical purposes.

4. First ever images prove 'lost echidna' not extinct

Scientists have filmed an ancient egg-laying mammal named after Sir David Attenborough for the first time, proving it isn't extinct as was feared.

An expedition to Indonesia led by Oxford University researchers recorded four three-second clips of Attenborough's long-beaked echidna. Spiky, furry and with a beak, echidnas have been called "living fossils".

They are thought to have emerged about 200 million years ago, when dinosaurs roamed the Earth.

5. Dog leads family to missing cat that fell into 30-metre mineshaft

An incredibly lucky cat has his canine companion to thank for saving his life after the dog led rescuers to a 30 metre-deep mineshaft the cat fell into.

The cat, Mowgli, disappeared on Oct. 20 and had been missing for six days. Owner Michele Rose told the BBC that she had “almost given up hope” of finding her cat.

6. World’s first whole eye and partial face transplant gives Arkansas man new hope

A surgical team at NYU Langone Health in New York has performed the world’s first successful whole-eye transplant in a living person: Aaron James.

After an accident at work led to the loss of his left eye and part of his face, Aaron was given a new window to his soul, as well as a partial face transplant.

7. Obesity drug Wegovy cut risk of serious heart problems by 20%, study finds

The popular weight-loss drug Wegovy reduced the risk of serious heart problems by 20% in a large, international study that experts say could change the way doctors treat certain heart patients.

The research is the first to document that an obesity medication can not only pare pounds, but also safely prevent a heart attack, stroke or a heart-related death in people who already have heart disease — but not diabetes.

---

That's it for this week :)

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[the-dawn-star]

Heyyy, hope your doing well! I was wondering if I could request Sukuna x fem!teen! reader platonic (if you aren't comfortable writing for fem reader then nonbinary is fine as well) in modern day (so yuji is sukuna's vessel) and sukuna taking an interest in reader like he finds her powerful/interesting and decides to take her under his wing?? Tyy <3

A/N: Hey and thanks for the request! I changed the idea a bit but I hope you like it still.

-S

+500ish words.

You had never met Sukuna personally, which is something that Yuuji was very grateful for.  

It was a weird little thing that Sukuna did when Yuuji was with you. He shut up. At first Yuuji was a bit worried of the sudden silence of the curse but let it go after understanding that this was his brief moment of silence.  

But really Sukuna was studying you and for that reason so quiet. He could see the power that surrounded you. He saw the potential that you had, but the jujutsu sorcerers didn’t seem to see that the same way.  

The unused potential really caught Sukuna’s attention and in the dark of the night, when Yuuji was asleep, his defenses were easy to break.  

Sukuna took control of the body, giving himself a few minutes to stretch before leaving the room.  

He didn’t have a clear mission for the evening, more it was the need for control of his vessel and need for getting outside even if for a moment.  

The grounds were completely silent if not for a grunting of your training.  

Sukuna followed your sounds, finding you in the training grounds. 

Your hits were poorly placed, and Sukuna was sure that you were going to sprain your arm at some point if you hadn’t already.  

All that potential... but whoever had trained you should not be doing it...  

You punched the punching bag hitting with cursed energy infused into your punch and as a result the bag broke off of its place and flew a few feet away from you thudding to the ground sadly.  

And at the same time you felt the piercing pain in your arm, and you let out a tiny whine.  

“You should be in bed.”  

You turned away seeing your friend standing lazily behind you.  

“So, should you too, Yuuji.” You said, smiling to your friend. The darkness really covered the marks that started to come to your vision as Sukuna walked closer to you before standing right in front of you.  

Terror landed on your face as you realized who was standing in front of you and for a second you forgot the pain in your arm.  

Sukuna laid his hand to your arm where the piercing pain was and for a second you expected him to rip you to pieces.  

But he didn’t, instead the pain lessened slowly before disappearing completely.  

You couldn’t help but stare at the curse.  

“I will see you tomorrow night here. And maybe with a little bit of practice you can reach your true potential.” It wasn’t a question; it was an order. 

“Why...” Your voice was shaking.  

“Because these idiots are never going to let you be as strong as you truly are...”  

You didn’t have time to say anything else, as Sukuna turned around and went back inside, leaving you alone in the yard.  

Feel like you want to support me via Kofi? No preasure tho!

[duachai]

MR. CORAZÓN - L.TM

I need you to hold it 'til you can't, I'll reward you

PAIRNG : Lee Taemin X Male Reader

SYNOPSIS : M/n, a BPM trainee gets handpicked personally by his idol to be his backup dancer for an upcoming tour. As the two get closer, M/n learns the importance of taking care of his body, and so does Taemin.

CONTENT WARNING : This is just an excerpt of my writings just to get the fingers typing. The full thing will be posted on my Wattpad, but look out for some full writings over here too !

AUTHOR'S NOTE : I'm a part-time college student and writing is my complete life. I will be taking requests here and there, but it is so totally appreciated if you were able to donate to my Kofi and help support me. If you can't that's totally fine and supporting me here and Wattpad is just as appreciated, cheers!

LINKS : Wattpad | Kofi

Training under BPM Entertainment wasn’t the easiest career M/n could have chosen. There were so many other options for him. His parents wanted him to be a doctor or lawyer, his school friends were working at restaurants and fast food chains around the city, and others his age aimed for content creators or influencers. But M/n wanted to dance.

Dancing was his calling. His life’s purpose, he would say.

For him, dancing was his stress reliever, something that would make him happy no matter what. That’s why when he found out his biggest inspiration and honestly, his celebrity crush, Lee Taemin, would be signing with his company, he nearly fell out.

“Dude, you know Taemin is coming in today? He’s going to lead our dance class, and oh my God, do you think it’s lame if I ask him to make a TikTok with me?”

M/n chuckled, “You’re so easily impressed, Chanwoo. He’s not even here yet.”

Today, was Taemin’s first day he had free with the new company, and he chose to specifically work with the trainees. And on top of that, it was a rumor some trainees would get promoted to work with him for his re-debut EP.

M/n leaned against the mirror after putting his dance bag off to the side. Nest to him, Chanwoo stretched his arms to prepare himself for class. “This is the opportunity of a lifetime, M/n. We could get closer to our favs even faster than it would take for us to debut!”

“It’s just the fast route if you ask me. And it’s probably not permanent,” M/n whined, but even though his words came out nonchalant, he still had a bit of hope in the back of his mind. Maybe this was his break, a chance to get his face out there.

The next hour, the normal dance teacher began proper stretch instruction. For the next half an hour, the talk of Taemin coming dwindled as the end of the class came near. 

“I can’t believe he didn’t come. I put my blood, sweat, and tears into that choreo.” Chanwoo whined, stomping his feet and he dragged his body in defeat.

M/n followed behind dragging his feet as he rolled his neck and worked the kinks out of his neck. He wasn’t as nearly disappointed as his friend, but a part of him wished that maybe Taemin would come and check him out, as selfish as it sounded.

“Anyways, where should we go eat today? My mom brought some kimchi this morning, but I’m sick of it.”

“You should be thankful you have a mom to bring you kimchi, Woo.” M/n sulked, head still draped down as he kicked his feet.

“Uh, you might want to pause those lunch plans,” A voice said. M/n looked up and another trainee awkwardly tugged at his hair, “M/n, you’re being summoned.”

Being summoned was one of the nerve-racking things any trainee went through. It only meant a few things. Best case scenario, you were being picked to debut early. Worst was… you were going home.

M/n was in limbo about the reason for his summon as he stood in the elevator alone. Everything he did over the last few weeks was analyzed in his mind. Did he mess up a choreo? Does his body need to be more fit? Was he lagging behind?

His whole head spun and he started to get dizzy. How was he supposed to go back to his parents and explain he got dropped from what they called, “A silly dream.” At the sound of the elevator’s ding, it was time to face his worst fear. Or so he thought.

The hallway to the director’s office seemed longer than any other hallway in the building. M/n rubbed his moist hands on his sweatpants, adjusting his hoodie to seem more neat.

As he stepped to the director’s door, he could see in the glass panel door there were multiple people inside. Then he realized, this wasn’t a demotion party, this was a meeting of some sort.

“M/n?” His name was called out by a familiar voice. His dance teacher.

“Oh, uh, hi,” M/n bowed respectfully, still so very confused.

“What are you doing standing out here, go in!” The teacher rushed a smile on his lips. Either this was a super encouraging way to tell someone they were getting sent home or something bigger was around the corner for M/n.

M/n pushed the door to the room open, now he could see a clear view of the people inside. The director of course at the head of the table, then his wife who was his co-director, a few managers M/n had never met, the dance teacher taking a seat closest to the door, the trainee advisor, and well… Taemin.

M/n froze up, are all these people here to see him? This meeting seemed way too elite for him to even step foot inside.

“Shin M/n, right? Go ahead and sit down,” the director pointed at a seat down the front of the table. A seat right across from the star legend.

M/n spent a few minutes staring at the wooden glossed-over table, a few papers passing down his way. A couple of times he looked up, locked eyes with Taemin then looked away like a startled puppy.

“Okay, so before we get started, how about I let our trainee introduce himself. M/n, go ahead and stand so everyone can see you.”

M/n reluctantly stood up, feeling so small in a room where everyone was looking intently. “Um, Hi, my name is Shin M/n. I’m from the US. And I’ve been a train for about a year and a half now.”

“Ok and, tell us why you want to be a K-pop idol, M/n.”

Hearing this question M/n drew in a sharp breath. He’d answered this question about a hundred times, but now it was all something cringe and mush in his head in a room full of people where it mattered.

But then he realized, he mattered too.

—

“Okay! Run the song back, M/n.”

Hustling toward the Bluetooth speaker to restart the song the fifth time that night, M/n quickly reset the song and then ran back to his starting point. The song started, Taemin’s voice coming in smooth and sultry as the sensual and iconic beat, “Move” filled M/n and his partner’s ears.

They had been practicing the duo choreography for hours now, but the more they attempted the more frustrated his partner, Misun, got at him.

“Fuck it!” Misun let go of M/n and stomped towards the practice room door with his bag, “I don’t care if you don’t get it right, I’ll switch partners. You won’t embarrass me in front of the whole world.”

M/n took in a deep breath, as he pulled his hair. He was frustrated too. Misun had quit on him a thousand times during their time together. But now, their deadline was coming in close and the tour was not far away. The whole thing was just stressful.

Just as he was about to pack up, he heard a knock at the door. Taemin popped his head around the door frame with a smile, “Knock knock.”

“O-Oh, I didn’t know you were here!” M/n said, startled and embarrassed.

Taemin stepped closer to the dancer, “I saw Misun storm out while I was passing by, and wanted to check on you. Everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything is fine.” M/n lied, thinking that knew that one of his dancers was lacking this skill and was dancing with two left feet after being picked solely for his dancing, he would be upset.

“No, no, you’re lying.” Taemin said with a pout, “Tell me what’s wrong.”

M/n sighed as he took a seat on the floor next to his bags against the mirror, Taemin sitting right next to him.

“Misun and I… just don’t seem like good partners. I know we’re meant to get what we get and don’t throw a fit like the director said, but working with her is like working with an untrained house cat. One day she’s encouraging, the next she’s clawing at me and everything I do.”

Taemin chuckled, “It’s like that. Working with others can be a lottery. But it’s nothing a little resilience can’t handle,” Taemin reached over and covered his hand with M/n’s resting on his knee, “You're a great performer, you hold yourself up better than most. You just have to believe in yourself. Because I already know I do.”

—

Taemin’s words rang in M/n’s head every second. It made him smile maniacally in the middle of conversations. After their talk, Taemin started monitoring M/n and Misun’s practices, making notes, and helping fix some mistakes. After Misun would leave, Taemin and M/n would go out and get food or drinks.

Their relationship grew closer and closer to the point where M/n had to ask himself, was he falling in love with his idol?

The deadline was due. It was the day everyone learned if they were going on tour with Taemin or being left behind. It was yet another nerve-racking day at the studio where everyone gathered to hear the results.

But when the director came in, everyone’s heart was crushed into tiny little pieces.

“Unfortunately, the tour has been canceled,” He announced, everyone’s shoulders slumping as questions started to form in everyone’s mouths. “I know, I know. But it’s impossible to continue on. Taemin was in an accident that sprained his ankle, so he’ll be taking a rest for a few weeks. He might even need a month to get back to his healthy self.”

As everyone whined about the loss of their gig, M/n’s lips pursed at the thought of Taemin being in an accident to cause him this much pain. The whole rest of the day M/n was anxious about Taemin, thinking of ways he could make sure he was alright.

But as he was sulking outside, a manager approached him. “M/n, M/n! Hey, I’ve got a super emergency, but I need to get this food and meds to Taemin. Could you possibly take it to someone else to give it to him?”

It was more like a request because before M/n could respond the bags were in his hand and the manger was off to his car. M/n stood there stumped for a second before smiling, this was his opportunity to go see Taemin.

It took about an hour to convince a staff to let him go see Taemin personally, he made up some bullshit about him being asked specifically to do this task, and if they didn’t help they’d have to answer to the director. It was stupid, but it worked.

M/n’s legs felt like complete jelly as he walked to Taemin’s apartment door. Traveling in Korea was nothing like the US, and even though he spent so much time there already it never felt to humble him as he got winded every time.

While catching his breath he might have accidentally walked into the door because a few moments later, Taemin opened the door slightly to see a hunched-over M/n clutching his chest.

“M/n? Are you okay?”

“Huh?” M/n said instantly lifting and straightening himself up, “What, oh yeah, I’m totally fine! H-Here… medicine.” M/n exclaimed, awkwardly handing Taeming the bags of convenience store foods and painkillers.

Confused, but concerned about M/n, Taemin opened the door more and stepped to the side, “Come in, you look like you could use some AC and water.”

Resting on the couch together, M/n watched as Taemin devoured his meal as if he hadn’t eaten for days. M/n giggled at the food filling in Taemin’s mouth, stuffing his cheeks like a tiny squirrel.

“You’ve got something there,” M/n chuckled, extending his arm over to Taemin’s face as a bit of rice stuck to the corner of his mouth. M/n’s thumb swiped over Taemin’s lips to catch the rice. Stunned, Taemin froze as M/n lifted his hand to his own mouth, parted his lips, and sucked the flavor off it.

There was something so sensual about that movement, in Taemin’s mind everything was in slo-mo, M/n eyes gazing right into his almost like a seductive taunt. An invite.

Tempted, Taemin’s arm snaked up to M/n’s wrist and he pushed himself atop of M/n, hands now above him, “Is this what you want?” A shiver ran down M/n’s spine, his question burning his skin up. Is cozying up close with your idol really the move? But at this point, Taemin was more than just a celebrity. He was a muse, a sexy muse. But was this a mistake?

“I want to, I do. I just-”

“Thinking about if people will find out?” Taemin said, cutting out M/n’s concerns for display like he was inside his brain. But Taemin reassured M/n with a kiss on the forehead and a sentence that would change their relationship forever.

“Follow your body, it knows you want my touch.”

It didn’t take long for the two to be stumbling into the bedroom in each other’s arms, sloppy kisses and clothes parting with skin onto the floor.

As Taemin sat M/n down on the bed, his tongue worked around in his mouth as one of his hands lightly tilted the dancer’s chin up, the other wrapped around his neck gently squeezing.

“Look at me, baby,” Taemin sang pulling back away from M/n who whined slightly at the loss of the heat on his lips.

“I got you tonight.”

[makelemonade]

Happy Birthday!

Relations: Ayato, Albedo, Alhaitham, Aether, Childe, Cyno, Scaramouche/Wanderer x Gender Neutral Reader (separate obv )

Warnings: uhm slight angst, swearing, too much fluff ew (aw), forgetting abt ur birthday (literally all of them do)

support me on kofi!! link is on master list (pinned post)

Ayato:

-I’ll be so fucking supercalfraglicious rn, that man won’t even be able to spend it with you.

-Yoimiya and Ayaka def bet 10$ he forgets acc

-but because I’m SUCH a sucker for angst to fluff

-In the morning, he won’t even know what day it is. He’ll be to tired to comprehend anything. He’s not a morning person in the slightest

-He does wake up before you though due to the work, so you’ll still be asleep while he greats ready and gives ur forehead a lil smooch before he heads out to do any tasks or duties

-you’ll wake up upset to see NO GIFT LIKE WTF

-richest man in Inazuma CANT even get u anything ?!

-maybe he left it for thoma so he can give it to you when you wake up!!

-when you go eat breakfast, ur eyes light up to see thoma holding a gift but slightly dim when it’s none other than his and not your beloveds.

-nonetheless your happy you got a gift !!

-it’ll be a few hours and STILL no gift. Thoma tells you with a sad dog pout face that Ayato did forget

-so you actually spend the day with him!!! thoma >>>>>

-your back in the evening, signs of daylight all gone as night was to hit

-when ur back you fully come to terms Ayato did forget about your birthday because he didn’t even wish you a happy bday :)

-you walk past him sitting on the bed with a few bags of stuff you liked that Thoma bought as another gift and Ayato looked at you confused

“Who bought you all of that?” He asked, sitting up and setting a few work files down on the bed.

“Thoma.” You answered, not even sparing him a glance.

“Confusion grew more along with a tinge of jealousy. “What was the occasion?”

“My birthday.”

-I’m telling u rn any type of emotion DROPS

-he lowkey might start crying

-hell ask u to sit on the bed and apologize for everything and like just kiss u all over and if ur still mad he’ll understand but like god knows you can’t stay mad at him

-he acc takes u on a shopping spree the next day and tasks Thoma with inviting all of your friends so when you get back to the estate, it’s none other than a surprise party!!

Albedo

-HE DOESNT EVEN KNOW WHAY A BIRTHDAY IS

-thankfully you explained it to him a few weeks before your birthday and even if he isnt human, he’d like to partake in it

-but he’s never done this before so he has to seek out Kaeya for them

-he went to Klee first but decided It wasn’t best to give you a bomb for your birthday

-Kaeya tells him all type of gift ideas and Albedo acc saves up a bunch of his money to buy you all your favourite stuff

-he’s so cute

-he tries to bake a cake

-key word tried

-his cake became demolished like alchemy couldn’t even fix it

-it was adorable though and you thanked him for everything. he forgot about work the whole day just for you :)

Alhaitham

-i cant decide if he forgets or is just too busy to spend it with you

-I think he’ll forget to call off work on the day of your birthday and won’t be able to spend it with you

-like he remembers your birthday but his slow ass just couldn’t remember to call off work

-he does have a present ready for you though! and a long message he sent to your Akasha while he was at work

-he actually did come home early just for you

-insert him twirling you around omfjwknfkwjdjwdjjed

-so if u decide to go out, he’ll take you to a very fancy and expensive restaurant and give u ur gift there

-if u decide to stay in he’ll bake a cake from scratch with you (those cute movie scenes where there’s like flour on both of ur faces)

-and then end the night watching a movie and falling asleep or birthday fuck, ur choice

Aether

-THIS MAN DOES NOT FORGET

-he’s just too busy he can’t spend the whole day with you

-BUT he takes you on commissions with him!!

-big mistake

-so u end up getting hurt and he has to take you to the nearest like hospital or whatever they have in that world

-he’ll probably just cry out of guilt because it’s ur birthday and part of his gift was that you practically almost die

-memorable birthday in my opinion

-birthday scar !!!

-he gives paimon a bunch of mora so she can go buy food and you both end up spending your birthday in the hospital

-hey at least he’s with you !!

-he acc crawls in the hospital bed beside you and your both just cuddling

-paimon is in the corner btw making sure y’all don’t do shit if ykyk

-once ur all better, he makes sure to take you out to dinner and get you an even better gift <3

Childe

-he forgets.

-not changing my mind.

-like I feel like ekaterina will have to remind him

“How is Y/N’a birthday so far?”

-insert jaw drop, shock face, eyes wide

-he will BURST out the bank and run straight to your shared home

-now you’ll be sad but like ur choice if u wanna cry or be mad

-if ur crying on the bed he’ll sit beside you and start kissing u all over ur face and saying he’s sorry and sorry all over again while whispering endearments

-if ur mad he’ll let himself be a punching bag

-he ENCOURAGES u to slap him but you only punch him playfully

-he’ll take you out and get you the most EXPENSIVE jewelry like literal fucking diamonds

-if u even want u can spend it with Zhongli too

-he just wants to make sure you have the best day just minus the fact he literally forgot

-he’ll take u in a trio to Snezhnaya or anywhere in the world just for you to forgive him

Cyno

-ladies and gents and my non-binary friends….

-he doesn’t forget!!!

-he acc has it all planned out- where you wanna celebrate is your decision

-if you wanna adventure around? Go for it! He’ll be with you and protect you from any monsters

-you wanna stay in? he’ll buy every movie you love and you’ll do a movie spree

-u wanna party ? Even on short notice he’ll Invite everyone hours before and youll all be having fun in the bazaar

-nonetheless he just wants you to have fun- it’s your day after all

-he has a lot of money, he just didn’t know what to get you, so if there’s any free time he’ll let you go around and buy whatever you want

-at the end of the day he’ll cuddle up to you and omg HE’LL LIKE whisper the happy birthday song to you as you drift off to sleep and idk why but that’s so cute to me

Scaramouche/Wanderer

-guys I’m just gonna say Scaramouche cuz for this he’s still working for Fatui but he is very ooc and soft (wanderer personality kinda)

-so sorry friends but the man literally doesn’t even know it’s your birthday month

-I think Childe will remind him by asking how your bday day is so far and Scaramouche will be like fuck

-Childe will def kaugh at him for forgetting but out of kindness he’ll tell Scaramouche what to do

-Scaramouche will race home and he’ll kiss u and shit hug u and apologize while saying he’ll do anything to make it up to you

-ANYTHING.

-you guys are in Snezhnaya and there’s not much to do but you decide to go ice skating !!

-you’ll have to teach him cuz he can’t skate for life

-he’ll encourage you to just take his mora or card or wtv and buy whatever you want cuz like

-he’s loaded

-you just decide to go buy some food aka hot chocolate to warm up. Maybe some snacks if you wanna watch movies that night

-he does buy you a cake though so when your home he can light it up

-he’ll sing the bday song while hugging you from behind and when it comes to your age he’ll blow out the candles with you then kiss u on the cheek

-UGH

[pastelcheckereddreams]

Four Seasons Manor WIP update

What's this?! A drafting update?! Yes! Only a year after the first one 😂

I admit I did fall down a massive rabbit hole with the set sleuthing, but I felt I just couldn't move on without solving the mystery of the two sets' layouts. Links to that three-part saga here:

Part One | Part Two | Part Three

With that mystery solved and the layout plans all set, I can finally bring you some previews for my drafting project as a whole!

Recognise anything? 👀

I'm aware that no one likes reading walls of text (I say while producing nothing but lengthy text posts like it's its own art form). So, for more info on how this draft will take shape as a final piece, follow the cut below.

Please also considering supporting me by reblogging my art and research posts, donating to my kofi, or buying one of my prints 🙏✨

Further artist links can be found in my pinned post (project list).

project list | kofi | prints

So, if you're one of the crazy people who actually read through the previous set sleuthing in its entirety, first of all I love you. Second of all, you will be aware of the artistic dilemma I posited at the end of the layout updates:

How can I merge these two very different sets together? Should I merge them together? Do I present an architecture draft that is simply reportage - showing both sets, and summarizing their different uses in the show, or do I draft the Four Seasons Manor I see emerging in the crossover of these two sets - the one I can feel starting to take shape in my brain?

I have decided to do both! 😃🤡

This piece will follow the draftsman style of my previous set design projects, and include buildings from both sets - but only as much as we are presented with on-screen, rather than the wider film set.

This is because, at its heart, my drafts are a way to better understand the locations that are presented to us by the show - a further way to enrich the scenes by understanding the space they are set within, and as an exploration of any cultural cues that I for one, as a Westerner, may not spot a lot of the time.

What kept bugging me, though, was that my fantasy world-building brain was not satisfied - I could not envision a whole, cohesive location for Four Seasons Manor because I kept noticing the switch from one set to the next. (Location spotting in cdramas has now become somewhat of a party trick for me 😂 The fourth wall has been broken.)

Now, I have not written fic in a long time, as the posting dates in my hanwenzhou tag can attest to, but we all know the persistence of the blorbo brainrot. I wanted to be able to imagine a place for all my happy wenzhou family, rebuilt Siji aus!!

So, going forward, I will be producing some more art that marries the two sets together and I can present as my interpretation of a full, rebuilt Four Seasons Manor in bloom - drawing on much of the set designs I have seen through my research, and my own personal headcanons.

I'm not sure how I want to do this yet, but I may start out using Siji to practice my marker art skills. So expect it to look a little like these pieces from my previous projects:

And, of course, the birdseye view of the Siji set at the beginning of this post.

I'm excited to begin!

That said, once the Four Seasons Manor draft is done, I also want to return to my CQL project and continue drafting the major sects. I better get moving 😂

Thank you for your support and encouragement, as always 💛

project list | kofi | prints

[shankss-magnificent-ass]

Imagine shanks taking you with him to Mary Geoise for his meeting with the five elders

Shanks: are you ready to go?

You: *dressed to the nines, but are sitting on his bed* are you sure I should go?

Shanks: of course, what are they gonna do? Turn me away? I'd like to see them try. Please trust me when I say it'll be fine.

You: but what if something happens, and you have to fight and end up getting in the way.

Shanks: that won't happen, I already used future sight and even had Yassop use his just to double-check. *Cups your face and presses hot scratchy kisses onto your forehead*

You: *laughs and pushes him away* Shanks! Your beard is so itchy!

Shanks: *Kisses you a final time and chuckles* let's get going love.

At Mary Geoise

Shanks: *escorts you into the Room of Authority by the arm*

Saint Jaygarcia Saturn: You were supposed to come alone!

Shanks: You said I couldn't bring any of my fighters, y'all never said anything about non-combatants. Also, this is my partner, I would never dream of leaving them out of such an important meeting.

Saint Nusjuro: You requested this meeting what did you want to talk about?

Shanks: a certain pirate

After the meeting

Saint Peter: *makes a superficial attempt to be cordial* I'm glad we could come to an understanding. It was nice to meet your new - business partner? Or are they your 'partner in crime'?

Shanks: nope, my business partner and partner in crime are the same person, and as you know it's Beck. This is my life partner.

All the Elders: *freeze and with their gaze locked on you*

Saint Warcury: You have taken a commoner as a spouse! Do you have any idea whose blood runs through your veins boy!

Shanks: uh no? Roger found me as an infant, abandoned in a trunk, on a battlefield.

Saint Saturn: Hold your tongue Topman, even if he has chosen someone with such dirty blood it isn't any business of ours. He isn't a Celestial dragon after all.

You: *gasps* dirty blood!

Saint Warcury: I suppose you're right, it isn't any of our business who he sleeps with. Even if they're unworthy vermin.

You: *grabs Shanks by the collar of his cloak and drags him out of the room and yells* I'm gonna screw the shit outta him purely to spite you old codgers!

Shanks: Really! Yes! Thank you!

You: I'm gonna fuck your face first, but I'm gonna be pissed we can force them to watch the whole time.

Shanks: Whatever you want baby, I'm yours.

Support me on Kofi and Patreon

List of Up-and-coming works

[panchatea]

POWDER ROOM BUSINESS - Gynophobia

ChaCha Story Commissions

IREH (Cho Seo Young) x Male Reader 

Trigger Warning: Violence, Drugs, Schoolplace Bullying etc…

Tags: Femdom, Blowjob, Piss, Smut, Non-con, Edging,  Purple Kiss, Ireh, Swan, HighSchool

WORD COUNT: 6674

A/N: Hi! I'm freshly out of hiatus so yeah I'm rusty... but yeah this is my comeback fic. Thanks again to the person who commissioned this!

support me on KOFI

FUCK.

How did it come to this?

Salted beads that were crawling non-stop down the cheeks. This worm’s eye view perspective seemed to be the new norm now. Those seemingly innocent, droopy, and sleepy eyes weren’t so attractively cute after all but rather chillingly scary.

That cocky smirk.

Her hysterical laugh.

That sight of her black heel that sat comfortably next to your head, down that toilet bowl seat would surely become a core memory played on repeat during bathroom breaks from now on.

The air feels cold… that only if you could call the little breeze that came from the noisy exhaust fan attached to the ceiling touching your bare skin “air”, come to think of it there was also that flickering fluorescent bulb next to it…

"Should I report that to the maintenance team so that they can fix it? Yeah, I'll do that once I get out of here…"

It felt hot, even though the air felt cold as the liquid that wetted your skin slowly evaporated and crept down your skin. Its stench was definitely not pleasing, not as pleasing as her perfume but it still definitely smelled like her, well… 

After all, it came from her. 

That hot liquid with the hints and hue of yellowish that came out of those pinkish lips.

"Look up."

Just do as the voice said.

Look up.

The image was still blurry, and the flickering light behind that was distracting, but at least the noisy exhaust fan was filtered by that loud ringing.

There was no time to ponder and feel what was left to feel. Here it comes, fuck how could you see it so clearly when it was so fast in reality.

That black heel of hers steadfast and locked on to meet your face.

FUCK.

Again, how did it come to this?

“Let’s all calm down and let go of each other’s hair, okay?”

That was when her contradiction of a pair of eyes first met yours. They were seemingly innocently attractive and lazy. Something you would never expect from a girl grabbing another girl's hair and pinning her down to that lunch table. Milk spilled, and the girl had her school makeup ruined. There were also tears and whimpering buried on top of all of that laughter coming from the girl that caused all of that and her friends around her that seemed unfazed by what was happening—it seemed like a normal occurrence to laugh about for them.

Seriously, diving into trouble like these… 

One of these days you'll have to take care of this hero complex. All it ever did was cause disaster anyways. Could you blame yourself though? How could someone ignore such a thing happening in front of you?

"What was that?" She looked up and met your gaze before slamming the girl on that plate of today's cafeteria’s special, bulgogi and stir-fried meat but that was not important anymore as surely that wasn't just gochujang sauce on her but also blood. 

Well, if it wasn't obvious enough, it's a stereotypical case of bullying—a SERIOUS case on that note.

"Oh, this?" Another slam, another loud whimper, and another stream of laughter. "Don't mind us and just eat your lunch, we're friends you see… and we're just playing around."

SLAM!

Fuck… can't really help yourself? You are not Superman…

"LET GO OF HER!" You yelled as you quickly ran to them and gripped the bully's arm to stop her. She winced, and you let go just as quickly as you realized you had used too much force. She smirked as she noticed your grip loosened. She went for one last slam that gained a loud yelp from the girl she finally let go, and before you could even react to maybe save the poor girl, her palm met your face.

SLAP!

A loud slapping sound echoed inside the cafeteria. Seriously, what a bitch… That slap packed a punch. 

You glared at her, for the first time taking the chance to give her a good look, and this girl really doesn’t look like your stereotypical queen bee bully—moreover, those glasses made her look like an innocent nerdy girl. 

Her nameplate says, “Cho Seo Young” and you only met her today, but you were so sure that you two won’t get along well.

“Are you new here? That’s rare, a graduating senior transferring. Did something happen at your old school?” She approached, looked at your nameplate and her hand landed on your cheek—that same cheek she slapped that she was now caressing. “You’re cute… I’m sure you were popular at your old school.”

She leaned forward, she inched closer, her breath… you could feel it.

“I’m sorry, they must have not informed you,” she whispered next to your ear which came with a lick and a little play bite. “Don’t worry, I’m sure that you’ll have fun here, but there’s one thing you have to remember and it’s what Ireh says, is what’s followed and you could never go against Ireh. So friendly advice since you’re new here, just mind your own business.”

“That’s funny, I would love to meet this ‘Ireh’ person that you’re talking about. She seems to be an interesting fellow. Thank you for the advice but I’m kinda nosy… I can’t help it so could you please leave that girl alone now?”

“Sujin, could you please tell our nosy friend here who Ireh is?” She ordered using a playful tone as she moved next to the girl she was bullying and the bullied girl responded quickly pointing at her.

“Sh—she’s Ireh… we’re friends, do—don’t mind us. We—we were just playing, I’m okay!”

“There we go! I’m Ireh, nice to meet you transfer student!” She exclaimed before hugging Sujin who was still shivering in fear and crying. She raised her hands, preparing to hit the girl she was hugging, and swung it but before her hand could land on the poor girl, you caught it.

“I’m sorry, I don’t see any Ireh here, could you please point me to her? I’m also new here so can you maybe show me around, Ms. Cho Seo Young?” You read the name that was on her name and her face turned sour, but you just ignored her and turned your attention to the girl beside her. “Park Su Jin? Sujin-ssi, can I call you that? Remember, it’s not playing when only one side is enjoying and the other is hurting.”

“You’re insufferable, transfer student,” Seo Young or Ireh said from the side before freeing herself from your hold, and intertwining the hand she just freed with yours. She once again inched dangerously close to your face, and this time she went in for a kiss.

Surprised, you couldn’t react quickly, and before you knew it, she was melting you with her lips. Her tongue moved fast, invading the inside of your mouth. She tied, she pushed in… she was pushing in something, and you tried fighting but then it was already too late as the next thing was she had already pushed the thing inside far enough that you had no choice but to swallow.

She broke the kiss.

You tried to process what just happened, backing down a little while trying to figure out what was that she made you swallow. 

A drug? What kind of drug?

However, that little time you spent thinking was enough time to kick in. Suddenly, everything felt so light and the image of what was in front of you was splitting. You were floating and it felt amazing.

“Welcome.”

Everything was blurry from then on and at some point, you just closed your eyes and…

SPLASH!

A bucket of cold water woke you up, and there was an image—a person blocking that flickering blinding light. You tried moving but to no accord, everything felt so heavy to move, or was it just that you were too weak? There was also that ringing in your ear… that wasn’t there before and that noise? Where is that coming from? That weird buzzing… 

Everything was spinning and felt light. It felt cold, it felt warm, and there was this creeping anxiety crawling on your skin. It felt as if you were floating yet you were sitting down somewhere… somewhere cold. Headache, it felt as if a thousand needles pierced your head, splitting it.

Water dripped down your face. It felt hot. You were cold, you were wet, you were shivering, and you were sweating. There was also this indescribable sensation and feeling. It was rather odd… everything felt fuzzy.

Your heart… was beating so fast. Nervousness creeps down your skin as everything felt frantic.

“Hey.” A voice caught your attention, and the image in front of you spoke. She was pretty, but who was she again?

A zap of pain surged through your head. Flashbacks of what happened? Of who that girl in front of you was? You remember now…

Ireh, otherwise known as Cho Seo Young, was just standing there, with a smirk—what a cocky girl. She was the bully you tried to stop in the cafeteria earlier? But then the last thing you remember was passing out after she kissed you?

BANG!

A loud bang interrupted your train of thought. Ireh had kicked the door behind her, closing it before leaning towards you. It was then that you realized how little the space was. She was towering over you while you two were enclosed by those not-too-tall white walls, and you were sitting down on something smooth, cold, and ceramic—it was a bathroom cubicle.

“What’s this? What did you do to me?” You barely managed to speak.

“Why? Are you feeling unwell?” A peck on your cheek that still stings(that slap from earlier was really no joke). Those lips of hers were so soft, for a moment there, you forgot that she’s a bully.

“You’re going to regret this,” You threatened even though it was clearly an empty one. You’re not going to be doing anything in your current state—even just speaking was hard, you could barely comprehend her word.

You tried pushing her using every bit of strength you had with your arms, but she easily overpowered you.

“Why? We’re only going to have fun.” She pulled you in, tugging on your necktie. Her grin said it all as she tilted your head up using her finger. Her image was splitting, you were lightheaded but you managed to make eye contact, her eyes were cold and angry, and what came after was her connecting your lips together. Once again, her lips were like butter, soft but that kiss… was empty.

The moment the kiss broke, she delivered another slap, equalizing the slap from earlier, and now both cheeks were left stinging.

“See, we’re having fun, right? You’re wet, let’s get you out of that shirt.” Her fingers crawled and twirled your tie before making you shiver as her nail ran down your body through the wet fabric sticking to your skin.

You tried pushing her once again but she just fended you off without any hardship.

Bit by bit, buttons popped open, and she got to see what was underneath. Her hands felt warm as she gently placed her palm on your chest.

“Look at you… wet and miserable.” Ireh giggled as she poked your chest, “Shivering, are you afraid of me?”

“I’m not afraid, I’m just cold and I feel shit because you drugged me.” Ireh ignored your remark and just focused on feeling you up.

“Your heart, it's beating so fast. Do you perhaps have a crush on me?” Ireh tugged and pulled. “You’re mine now.”

"Over my dead body!" You retorted and spat on her beautiful face. A little payback for what she had done so far. A little bit of pettiness even though you didn’t want to stoop down to her level—it was all you could do—stain her angelic face and wipe that devilish grin off her face.

“Fuck you!” Ireh cussed as she backed away and kicked your groin. Your voice filled the room as you screamed at the unbearable, indescribable pain her black heel gave you. 

“How dare you spit on my beautiful face!”

Tears dropped from the sides of your eyes as she laughed. You tried retaliating every chance you got, trying to block her kick but it was futile, the pain was unbearable and you felt weak.

“I’ll show you… not to fucking mess with me!”

One kick after another, multiplying the threshold of the pain after each contact. 

“I fucking hate people like you. Going around prying into people’s businesses. A hypocrite, trying to save that girl. Big news! Sujin won’t save you! After all, she was the one who gave you that thing that makes it hard for you to move even a finger right now. All I did was give you her little drug. She won’t be saved either, I’ll break her later too! I bet she’s hiding somewhere crying, laughing, pitying herself! Drowning in her own guilt while being so happy because I found a new toy and I won’t use her for a while!”

When she stopped it wasn’t painful anymore as it was numbed from the extreme pain. 

Ireh soon ditched those glasses of hers, throwing them down the floor before sitting down on your lap and once again inching towards you, removing what little space separated the two of you.

“You said you wanna meet Ireh… I am her! Cho Seo Young, that girl is dead. I killed her… and now I’ll make you wish, you're dead too.”

“Cho Seo Young, you're pitiful…” Her hands found their way up to your neck and gripped it. You choked as she tightened her grip little by little, as the need for air strengthened with each second passing by, and as your consciousness slowly faded, her image was all in sight. 

Her smirk and those dirt brown eyes as she looked down on you told you that she viewed you as nothing more than a toy. 

Fuck, she has a beautifully sculpted nose, and those soft supple lips—if only she wasn't a bully, she was someone to fawn over. Seriously, doesn't it seem weird to be admiring her while she chokes you?

"You're so brave, calling me by that name twice."

Ireh opened her mouth and then her saliva slowly dripped from it to your gaped mouth straight to your throat.

"Don't worry… soon enough you'll be begging me for more."

She finally let go of your neck. A surge of air kicked in as you coughed and tried to spit her saliva out of your mouth—some you already swallowed…

She didn't even let you rest as she delivered a punch straight to your gut, making you throw up, and before you could recover Ireh pushed you. Your head bounced off the wall, adding to all that pain as she forced you to lean back, and one last slap before leaning towards you once again.

"What happened? Cat's got your tongue?" Ireh mocked as she watched you wince in pain and gasp for air. With her fingertip, you tip over, and Ireh once again inched dangerously close to you. 

Everything still hurts, everything within your line of sight still splits into multiple images. Your focus was off, and that weird buzzing, that flickering light, and her scent… still bothers you. Why are you noticing this now? Fuck, her perfume was so sweet. 

"Cho Seo Young, you're going to regret this."

She slapped you.

"Tsk, I told you not to call me that. Forget it, you'll learn soon enough. Open wide~ Here's something that would make you a little compliant."

You could not focus, and can't even maintain eye contact. Eyelids were getting heavier and heavier. Everything felt colder but she was warm when she leaned over you. Speaking of warmth, the spots she slapped, punched, and kicked were warm—more like stinging in pain and aching but they countered the cold.

You blinked and her lips connected to yours.

Her kiss this time was torrid, fast, hurried, but still pleasant yet still empty. Ireh's tongue was fast to invade the inside of your mouth and just like before, she was pushing something once again. Another pill? She said it was something that would make you more 'compliant'?

You tried to battle her, trying to tie knots with your tongues and trying to stop her from pushing the pill in, but to no avail, it was useless as she won. She was successful in pushing the pill to the back of your throat. 

"Swallow."

She hurriedly broke the kiss. A string of saliva that was cut quickly as you choked but couldn't throw up the drug because of her hand that shut your mouth close.

You swallowed.

"Good, now don't worry… I'll make you feel good soon enough."

As she leaned backward, trying to rest a little The drug kicked in. That ringing slowly faded out. The headache slowly dissipated. Everything felt lighter, it wasn't cold nor hot, it was just pleasant. You were floating. You tried speaking but giggles came out of your mouth.

Everything felt slow, even the flickering of the bulb seemed slower and that buzzing sound didn't bother you anymore.

It doesn't hurt anymore—nothing hurts anymore. 

"Transfer student…"

You heard Ireh call you, but you couldn't make out the rest of her words, it was just her mouth opening and closing.

It was a dream.

You finally moved your body to fix your sitting position, leaned on the wall behind you properly, and rested your head.

Ireh also straddles your lap. Push her because she was surely up to no good but for some reason, it felt like she wouldn't hurt a fly this time. Her touch… They were feathers and they felt pleasant—they felt safe.

Everything was calm.

You could only watch her as she got comfortable, getting rid of her blouse and her bra, and let you feast on the sight of her topless torso—it was hypnotizing—Ireh was alluring. 

When she leaned to put her hands to work, you didn’t resist nor really wanted to. She skillfully got rid of your tie and got you out of your wet shirt. Ireh caressed your cheeks, soothed them as if she wasn’t the reason why it was red.

She worked her way down to your neck where she left a kiss after tracing the marks she made choking you. 

After that, she found your chest and she really knew where to tease and tickle, sending an electric sensation using her fingers and tongue.

“What a nice toy you are…” Ireh continued fluidly and this time she found your abdomen. She giggled as she feel it up with her whole palm, and not long after, she reached for your groins which she attack ferociously earlier.

Her skillful hands and fingers quickly got rid of your belt, and from there she tugged, revealing your shaft. She grasped it gently and started stroking it simultaneously gaining moans from you. It was surprising how it wasn’t broken with how much she kicked your groin. 

Ireh as a person is very contradicting… She had caused you so much pain and yet she had also been very gentle with you, kissing and soothing the same spots she harmed. Now, with her long and thin fingers, she tenderly and caringly stroked your dick to its full hardness.

Shameful, getting hard on the girl who beat you up—turned on by a bully.

She’s enjoying this, and so was your body. It wasn’t the pleasuring she was enjoying, but rather it was watching you fall into submission with each up and down stroke. She giggled each time your cock throbs on her hand and that was enough for her to continue violating you.

“What’s this? Do you like me now? Getting hard for me,”  Ireh mocked in your ear after a playful bite. You wanted to retort but the shame kept you from it and the fact that you were actually feeling great. Honestly, just her touch made you feel appetitive and each stroke feels euphoric.

It might be because she was just good with it, maybe it was the drug, or perhaps it was the feeling of pleasure after being beaten to numbness, but that just doesn’t mean anything anymore as Ireh pushed herself off your lap and kneeled in front of you.

All this time, she was looking down on you, and now Ireh was looking up at you yet, it still felt like she was the one in control and those mocking eyes said it all. 

There was no stopping her now as she completely removed your slacks—tugged them down for your dick to be out to the open for her enjoyment. 

She looked at your cock like it was a toy and like a kid, she didn’t waste any time to take the chance to play with her toy. 

Wetness and a touch of a soft muscle greeted your member. You just watched her as she started to lick the tip of your cock while she use her free to keep it steady and standing before giving another soft kiss. 

It was euphoric.

Soon her tongue landed at the base of your cock. Slowly, tracing the whole length of it while maintaining eye contact. She trailed up. Ireh licked every corner of your cock like it was a lollipop and when she did reach the tip once again, she stopped and played with the underside of it, tickling it with her tongue swirls, leaving you to become a moaning mess.

You throbbed. Ireh planted another soft kiss right on top and using her tongue, she teased the little slit of your tip.

There wasn’t any plan on stopping anytime soon, as she gave a handful of playful lick on your slit—it tickled, and her licks sent tingles upon your shaft. It was electrifying.

Ireh is a woman full of contradiction and once again, she proved it. She might have started gently but now she was coming in like a lion. Suddenly, your tip met the back of her throat, making you groan.

1

2

3

4

5

She stayed down there for several seconds before pulling out and going down again this time with just her tongue. It came in fast and rough, a long lick that traced each inch. Her lips wrapped around the whole circumference of your cock. Her tongue occupied the entirety of your dick, and not one tooth could be felt, and once again her lips finally landed at the base of your cock, and your tip hit the walls of her throat. It was soft, wet, warm, and tight. She held it in for several seconds up until she couldn’t anymore and pulled back, leaving a pool of saliva that enveloped your member that soon dripped down your balls.

Ireh gasped for air and you followed her, catching your breath for very different reasons—for her it was the fact that her breathing was restricted, and for you, it was because of the agonizing pleasure she gave. It would be a lie to say that it didn’t feel amazing, but shame still followed it.

“I like you better this way. Submissive and not annoying.” Her lips met your cock, and you moaned in response, and even with her mouth full, you could imagine the corners of her lips raising to a smirk. “You’re so cute.”

“I won’t give in.” Your body already did. She ignored you as she continued to bob her head, taking your shaft in and out of her mouth in between your legs, diligently blowing, licking, and sucking with her eyes locked on yours while your hardened shaft slipped in and out of her lips.

“Don’t lie to me.” Ireh pumped up and down, stroking your cock’s whole length. She let her saliva drip down to its head, making sure it was properly lubricated—in combination with her handjob, Ireh’s lip once again landed on the tip of your cock, engulfing it once again. It was addicting, it was intoxicating, it was tingling, it was electrifying, shivers running down your spine as the girl you hate went down your shaft.

You were dazed in both a euphoric high and a drug, she turned you into a gasping and moaning mess, and Ireh just cockily smiled before continuing to roam on each and every inch of your dick while her hand continuously moved in an up and down motion.

It didn’t take long before you could feel the build-up in your groin as again and again, you watched your dick disappear and reappear from her mouth. All your nerves, all of your focus was directed to Ireh and the way she moved her tongue—the way her lips wrapped around your shaft.

Close your eyes.

It was dreamy.

Semen built up and started to crawl through your length. You knew it was coming even though you didn’t want it to come. However, your body was screaming for it, but then a pop was caught by your ear and suddenly all sensation stopped.

Open your eyes.

There you found Ireh, her image was a little bit blurry but you were able to make out her figure towering over you. She knew what she did and she was clearly satisfied and happy while your member ached and blue-balled.

“I’m tired, it is not fair if you’re the only one enjoying here,” Ireh playfully said while she smirked putting on a show as she reached inside her skirt and pulled down her obviously ruined panties.

“Don’t stare too much, I’ll melt.” She joked before throwing her panties at your face, covering it which you quickly removed but to your surprise, Ireh straddles your lap, and you could feel it, the wetness of her core as your member brushed on it.

Ireh knew and she just stared at you, smiling almost sweetly while she went in for a quick peck. Which made you wonder…

“Seo Yo—” 

SLAP!

“Don’t call me that,” Ireh sternly said as she caressed the cheek she just slapped. “Now, do it properly.”

“Ireh…”

“There, that’s more like it, transfer student.” You were still drug dazed and it was still hazy. Although the slap woke you up from your dreamy state a little but enough to knock some sense from you.

“Why are you doing this?” You asked her. Ireh leaned forward, nestling on your chest. She didn't answer just yet but instead, she gave a playful lick on your nipple and a bite.

It was strange… It was a bite but it was tingling and electrifyingly pleasing, and now with that, you had also realized how her slap didn't hurt either.

"What kind of drug did you even give me?" You questioned, following up the first one as you finally managed to do small movements—one hand to grab on her waist and the other on the back of her head as she was still leaning on your chest.

"Curious? Why does it feel good?" Ireh said as she reseated to see you eye to eye. "There's no pain, right? And this..."

Ireh planted her hands on your chest, using them as support while she started to grind her hips.

“You ask me why?”  Long and slow movements, grinding using her hips and teasing with just the lips of her sex. “It’s because I enjoy breaking people like you transfer student.”

“I’m pent up and I get off seeing a righteous person like you fall into this state.” Her slow and long grinding was edging—pleasantly torturous and euphorically shameful. You could only whine with your powerlessness and this only fed her ego more. “I made you feel unimaginable pain, and then lifted you up to heaven. See, you’re not even resisting anymore, you’re even holding onto me.”

Ireh was moaning in between her words, feeling up the gratification of her actions as she grind more and more. Her wet lips were so close yet so far, your cock was aching and throbbing to enter but it couldn’t, edging you as she enjoyed it all—her complete dominance over you, and the ego boost it provided—the way you and your cock were the perfect toys for her, it hit all right 

places.

She stopped suddenly, halting everything to wrap an arm around your torso and another at the back of your head. Ireh clung onto you, completely removing any space between the two of you, pressing her own body onto yours.

Ireh continued rocking her hips and suddenly upping the ante to her rhythm—her fast and crazy speed. She keep grinding down on you as you heard her moan and gasp for air as she seemingly decided to just forget about you and focus on her pleasuring herself. 

Her nails dug into your back, and her hand clenched on your hair as she ran wild. Ireh didn’t plan on stopping anytime soon. Her breath hitches. Her gasping and moaning continued. She was frenzied, crazily grinding her hips forward and backward. 

Her wetness dripped on your member, lubricating her movements and allowing it all to flow fluidly. She closed her eyes, relishing it, giving onto the haze… She wasn’t drugged just like you were but it was clear from your blurry and dreamy sight that she was as drunk as you were.

She pressed her hips, pushed her pelvis onto yours, and ground her hips as she moaned in pleasure. Of course, she wasn’t the only one as you too were a moaning mess.

It was surreal and it was unreal. There wasn’t any penetration but at that point, there wasn’t greater pleasure than the one she was giving you—it was pleasurable and out of this world.

You throbbed, swept by the pleasure, and you unconsciously bucked your hips using the little strength you could muster.  It didn’t take long, once again you could feel the build-up that was more rapid this time, crawling up your length, but just like the last time, it was as if she knew.

She stopped.

Her timing was impeccable.

Not long after she stopped, she opened her eyes and made eye contact made with you, into each other with her seeing only a doped man with drunken eyes while you saw the emptiness in 

hers. 

She didn’t forget about you.

She smirked and laughed maniacally even pulling on your hair, catching you off guard and surprising you. You tried fighting but before you could retort, she pulled you into a hug. 

Her hardened nipples brushed on your torso as she lifted herself slightly to reach your ear, licked on it, bit on it, and whispered, “What is this? Enjoying yourself too much, transfer student? What a hypocrite.”

Ireh reached underneath, grasped your cock, lined up your shaft with her wet folds, and with a shift of her hips, your tip penetrated her pussy, but it wasn’t as easy as that as she went on slowly torturous speed.

“Just say it.” Slowly she dropped herself an inch before stopping once again.

“Say my name and I’ll let you feel have it whole.” Ireh let out a moan as her fold slowly diverge and as your cock slowly penetrates her pussy. 

“Can you feel it?” She was already halfway and you couldn’t take it anymore. The euphoria of her wetness and her tightness slowly enveloping your cock was unbearable. It was rhapsodic, your brain was overloaded by these different feelings and sensations that were both complementing and contradicting each other.

“Can you feel my pussy?” You could. Its tightness, its wetness the way it gripped your cock, the warmth her quim has as it hugged your member.

“Just say that you want me.” She stopped, and you groaned before taking a deep breath and opening your mouth to speak, “Ireh please, I want you.”

She smiled.

“How about a no,” Ireh said before laughing victoriously as she pulled out and got off you. It was all a trap and you got caught. A honey trap to prove her point and to humiliate you, and she was successful.  She made you remember that she was the villain of this story and for a moment you forgot about this crucial fact.

Despite her dead eyes, and empty kisses she still got you. There was no passion but she was skillful and that was enough you make you submit.

The high and pleasure made you submit.

What a disgrace of a man you are.

Her laugh echoed in that small space and her glaring eyes gleamed victoriously. Ireh got what she wanted: make you use her name “Ireh”, make you submit to her, and expose you to what you really were—in her own words a “Hypocrite”.

“Did you really think that I would have sex with you?!” She exclaimed before grabbing your dick tightly, stroking it, working her hand, and giving you another shot of ecstasy as she smugly looked at your face. Suddenly that euphoric dream turned into a nightmare.

Anger crawled through your skin, your heart rate escalated, you could feel yourself sweating more and more, and suddenly you were gasping and chasing for air. At that moment you were so angry but you just couldn’t do anything. You wanted to scream at the top of your lungs but your line of sight was spinning. Open your mouth but nothing was coming out.

Ireh… Cho Seo Young…

IREH,

CHO SEO YOUNG,

Remember, she’s a bully.

“You’re nothing but trash.” Ireh’s palm once again met your face and soon enough after lots of one-sided brawl you were sitting on the bathroom floor. It just went by, you closed your eyes, and when you opened them once again, your head was on the back of the toilet seat. Look up and see her. Guess the drug helped you with that, there was no pain, it was just it.

“You don’t even deserve to be my dog.” Ireh lifted her skirt, and her glistening pink pussy was in full sight. “Just be my toilet,  that’s how low you are. That’s where you belong.”

You could not see her face… not fully but you knew, Ireh still have that smirk, and those eyes of hers that looks at anything as if they were trash and they were below her. She sinks, squatting on your face. Her scent grew stronger—that sweet lavender with that mix of musk, filling your mouth through your nostrils.

“Drink it,” she commanded, but you really didn’t have no choice as her lips met yours lips. She moaned loudly at that contact and that musky smell grew exponentially, then liquid flew out. Stuttered jets of her piss, you collected using your mouth. 

Its inconsistency was a bitch, some spilled and escaped from the sides of your mouth, and some went astray to your nose, your eyes that were shut closed, and other parts of your face. Try as hard as you can, gather and swallow her warm, salty streams of that yellow-hued liquid coming out of her pink lips. 

Pray your neck doesn’t break. Pray you don’t drown from her piss. Pray all of these ends soon.

Once again much obliged to the drug for numbing your pain. Without it, a strain on your neck, and that repeated hitting of the back of your head to that ceramic toilet bowl seat would be painful.

Did time go slowly? Or was it just that her pissing was never-ending?

She gripped your hair and gathered an ample amount of your hair as she ground on your mouth, adding more pressure on your neck, making it harder to catch oxygen and continuous streams of her piss.

Drink and swallow, her piss cascaded from her quim to your lips while some spilled—you couldn’t drink it all, leaving you to question whether you drank more or spilled more? Was her aim good enough to not spill more than you could ever swallow?

Thankfully, liquid stopped dripping from her quim, and relief soon came after. The constant bouncing and hitting of your head stopped on the toilet seat and the pressure on your neck was 

lifted as she finally removed her quim from your mouth.

“Look at you, transfer student. Now you’re looking more like yourself.”

FUCK.

How did it come to this?

Salted beads crawled down your cheeks. You weren’t sure if they were her piss or if they were your tears. Ireh was once again looking down on you—you’re now the worm of the perspective and now that seemed to be the norm now. Her seemingly innocent, droopy, and sleepy eyes which were honestly so attractive were actually cold and evil.

That cocky smirk.

Her hysterical laugh.

She lift her heel, and you could only stare and follow it as she sat them comfortably next to your head on that toilet seat, and that image would surely be imprinted forever on your brain—flashed on repeat during your visits to the bathroom from now on.

Ireh was catching her breath and this moment might be the only time when you could clear your head. 

The air feels cold… 

It feels hot…

She’s silent… wasn’t she supposed to be saying something about how shameful you are? Or how pitiful you look?

That exhaust fan is noisy…

That bulb was flickering…

It was hot, it was cold as the liquid that wetted your skin slowly evaporated and crept down your skin. Its stench was definitely not pleasing, not as pleasing as her perfume but it still definitely smelled like her, well… 

Being a toilet seat is hard, remember to be more kind to toilets nowadays.

That hot liquid with the hints and hue of yellowish that came out of those pinkish lips.

"Look at me."

Just do as the voice said.

Don’t defy Ireh.

“What Ireh says, is what’s followed and you could never go against Ireh.”

Look up.

Her image was still blurry, and the flickering light behind that was distracting, but at least the noisy exhaust fan was filtered by that loud ringing.

The time to ponder ended there and all that could be done was feel what was left to feel. Here it comes, fuck how could you can see it so clearly when it was so fast in reality.

That black heel of hers meets your face.

FUCK.

Close your eyes.

The next time you opened your eyes, there was a person…

But there were a thousand reasons why you couldn't make her out properly. Your head was splitting, your line of sight was blurry, etc… but you were able to make out to say

It was a girl.

Ireh?

No.

This girl was different…

"You're awake." 

Her voice… 

It sounded familiar. 

"I'm sorry."

"Who are you?" You asked—it seemed like you were sober enough now. Plus, your sight was slowly recovering and when she spoke once again, you were already able to fully see her face.

"My name… Park Su Jin."

The girl Ireh was bullying…

"Sujin-ssi—" She cut you with her lips. Suddenly pulling you into a torrid and deep kiss. Her lips, they were heavenly but that kiss…

It felt oddly familiar.

And so it was because it was the same kiss.

The same tactic Ireh used to make you swallow those pills of some drug.

Sujin pushed, and she easily overpowered you. Perhaps because you were too weak or she was just good at kissing but nonetheless, she made you swallow the pill.

She was a good kisser.

"Sujin-ssi, why?" You asked after she broke the kiss. She didn't answer, instead, she grasped your dick, stroking it to its full length once again.

Seriously, what is it with this school and its female students who violate their peers?

The drug kicked in and that was when Su Jin finally spoke—almost whispering and not caring whether you hear or not.

"I'm sorry… Please, the least I can do is make you cum."

End.

*******

EYY! HOW WAS IT? I know I'm rusty... haven't wrote for a while since life happened but I do hope this turns out fine... without too many mistakes.

If anyone is curious Here’s a link of my KOFI. You can commission me like this or just tip me (they are highly appreciated cause I’m broke) hahaha I promise you if you ever commission it would be worth it and I will do my best.

[arlana-likes-to-write]

Lightning Bug - Chapter 3

Master Post for Lightning Bug // Previous Chapter 

Warnings: small mention of human trafficking, food inscurities 

Word Count: 5.9k

If you like my works: support me on kofi

Natasha didn’t go on her normal run. She had every intention of going; she woke up early, changed out of her sleepwear, and opened the fridge to grab a bottle of water. But the untouched Chinese food made her stop. So instead she was making coffee and staring at the teen’s door. She knew she couldn’t go in there and force her to eat, that would cause a negative association to food. The Black Widow remembered when Yelena first moved to the tower and how reserved she was towards eating. She heard the door of her bedroom open and her girlfriend walked into the living room, yawning and rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. She stared at Natasha, blinking slowly as if her brain was trying to process why Natasha was standing in the kitchen. “Good morning,” The Black Widow said, pouring the fresh coffee into her mug. Wanda slowly walked over to her, her eyes not leaving her. “Why are you acting weird?”

“What are you doing?” She poured another cup for Wanda. 

“Drinking coffee.” Wanda rolled her eyes, adding sugar to the coffee. “Do you want some coffee with your sugar?” The redhead joked. 

“Suka (bitch).” She mumbled, sipping on her coffee. “Okay I’ve had coffee now tell me why you didn’t go on your run.” Natasha sighed, looking into the brown liquid. 

“She didn’t eat last night.” She gestured to the fridge. “I went to grab my water and the Chinese food we brought up is untouched.” The Black Widow paused to gather her thoughts. “I don’t want to push food on her but she needs to eat.” 

“She did eat.” Natasha spun around to see America standing there with her arms crossed. She yawned, stretched her arms above her, and grabbed a mug. “Is there enough for me?” She asked. 

“Aren’t you a little young to be drinking coffee?” Natasha asked. 

“Probably.” The teen shrugged. “But I have a training session with Sam and my brain is still asleep.” Natasha handed the pot to the young girl. Sam was the textbook definition of a morning person. She pitted the poor girl. 

“How do you know she ate?” Wanda asked. America added cream and sugar to the mug, mixed it with a spoon, and took a sip before answering. 

“I couldn’t sleep last night, nightmares.” She quickly added, waving her hand over the issue. Natasha worried about her and made a note to check on her later. She knew Wanda was thinking the same as her face softened. “Anyways,” America continued, leaning against the fridge. “I was walking down the hall and I heard a noise in the kitchen. I went to check and there she was looking through the fridge.” She took another sip. “I startled her and she thought I thought she was stealing.” America frowned. “After that small hiccup. I made us popcorn and strawberries to share.” 

“You had popcorn and strawberries for dinner.” America groaned, walking around the bar and sat down. 

“I told her you were going to give me issues on what we ate!” Natasha laughed. “At least I got her to eat something.” 

“Thank you.” Wanda said. America shrugged. 

“You were right she is very shy but her eyes.” America’s own eyes grew wide. “They are a color I’ve never seen before and I can travel through different universes.” Wanda nudged her hip against Natasha and they smiled listening to America talk. “I think we are friends now, I mean I hope we are.” She added nervously.     

“I’m sure you are.” Natasha reassured the girl. “Just don’t get upset if she takes some time to come around.” America nodded. 

“Trust me, I understand the feeling of growing up much sooner than we needed to.” Before Natasha could elaborate more, FRIDAY began to speak. 

“I do apologize for the interruption but Agent Hill is on her way up to speak with you Miss. Romanoff.” Natasha groaned which caused America and Wanda to giggle. As on cue, the elevator opened and the Deputy Director walked over to them. After Natasha leaked all of SHIELD's secrets to the world once they discovered HYDRA infiltrated their way into the organization, it took a great deal of work from Maria and Nick to rebuild the organization. It was going by SWORD these days, Natasha didn’t understand Americans and their passion for acronyms. 

“Good morning,” Maria said, walking to the fridge and opening it. She helped herself to a yogurt and a banana that was sitting on the counter. 

“Did you come all this way to steal our food?” Natasha asked. Maria shook her head. 

“No but why not kill two birds with one stone? I haven’t eaten breakfast yet.” Natasha wanted to argue that none of them had eaten but she kept her mouth shut. “So I’ve come to steal you and your food.” 

“What’s going on?” The Black Widow questioned   

“We’ve noticed some suspicious activity on the border between Ukraine and Russia.” Natasha’s blood turned cold. She tried to keep her thoughts at bay but she knew she failed when Wanda grabbed her hand. “And since you are our resident Russian, Fury asked for you.”

“I can guarantee there are other agents that speak that language.” Maria sighed, giving the Black Widow a kind smile. It was a smile that Natasha and a handful of people saw. The relationship between her and Maria wasn’t what it was now when she first defected to SHIELD. Maria didn’t trust the Russian (Natasha didn’t blame her). It was months of walking on eggshells until the two were paired up on a mission and it went south. It resulted in Natasha saving Maria’s life. Since that day, their relationship changed and Natasha found another sister.    

“And I suggested those very agents but I do what the pirate asks of me.” America laughed, trying to cover up the noise with her coffee which caused the teen to cough. Maria smirked at the teen. 

“Go, we’ll make sure she’s okay.” Wanda said, giving her hand a squeeze. Natasha sighed. 

“Fine,” she grabbed a travel mug that had a black widow spider on it. It was a Christmas gift from Peter. She filled it with her unfinished coffee and topped it off from the pot. “But breakfast is on you since you interrupted mine.” Maria shook her head with a laugh. 

“Whatever you say, Romanoff.” Natasha gave Wanda a quick kiss on the cheek - ignoring the fake gag from Maria and ruffled America’s hair. The teen slapped Natasha’s hand out of the way but the Black Widow didn’t miss the smile she tried to hide. Natasha followed Maria to the elevator and stepped in once it opened. Maria ordered the AI to take them to the sublevel and they remained quiet as the elevator moved. But Natasha wasn’t stupid, she could see Maria stealing glances at her. 

“Are you going to ask me your question or keep staring at me?” Natasha asked. “You may start giving a girl the wrong idea.” Maria rolled her eyes, smacking the Black Widow playfully against the chest. 

“There is a rumor going around that you and the witch adopted a teen.” Natasha bit back a sigh. She was going to kill Stark. SWORD agents turned into mild class suburban housewives when it came to gossip, to them saving the world came second when there was a rumor. 

“We didn’t adopt her.” Natasha clarified. “We just offered her a place to stay.” 

“That sounds a lot like adopting minus all the legal technicalities.” The Black Widow glared at the agent. “Alright, alright.” Maria put her hands up in surrender. “When can I meet her?”

“Give it some time. She’s a little skittish around new people. 

“Sounds like a certain Black Widow I used to know.” Maria joked. 

“I really want to punch you right now.”

“That is not how you treat someone who is paying for your breakfast.” Natasha shook her head with a smile and followed Maria to her car. 

* 

Wanda sighed as the elevator closed. Russian missions were never easy for both Black Widows, it was hard for them to visit their adopted parents on their farm in St. Petersburg. Wanda hoped Fury only needed Natasha to translate documents, provide some insight, and not have to go to Russia. “Alright,” she said, shaking herself out of the funk she was in. “Breakfast. Are you hungry?” America smiled. 

“Yeah I could eat so I don’t pass out with Sam.” Wanda smiled and her fingers began to glow. Her magic opened the cabinets and the fridge. 

“What are we thinking?” She asked, so she took out a frying pan and placed it on the stovetop along with a cartoon of eggs, flour, and milk. 

“Start simple,” America said. “The fewer options will get her to eat.” Wanda nodded, putting away the flour and decided to scramble eggs. 

“Good point, thank you.” America nodded. 

“No problem.” she jumped off her seat. “I’ll go wake her up.” 

“America,” Wanda said, before the teen could get too far. The witch watched the teen stop but didn’t face her. She could feel her mind racing. “Your nightmare. Do you want to talk about it?” America tensed up.

“I can’t dream,” she whispered. Wanda knew about her powers and the fact that she could not dream meant she was the only America across the multiverse. “But that doesn’t stop my mind from creating scenarios that scare me.” She looked over her shoulder. “It was about her.” Agatha Harkness, a witch that was after the teen for her powers. 

“She can’t hurt you anymore.” Wanda made sure of it and trapped Harkness in a small town in Westview, New Jersey. America gave Wanda a sad smile. 

“It doesn’t make it easier.” She kept walking before Wanda could respond. No, it does not make it any easier. Her own dreams were filled with past enemies that were long gone but still able to hurt the ones she loved. Sighing, Wanda gripped onto the counter and found herself getting lost in the design of the marble. Hydra Scientists. Ultron. Thanos. His children. Even the STARK Bomb that killed her parents. The world had not been kind to her or her family and sometimes she wished she could use her powers to take away all their pain and transport them into one of the sitcoms she loved so much, life seemed simpler there. She watched as her fingertips turned black, a side effect with her brief contact with the Darkhold. She hid the discoloration but when her emotions were a little out of control the coloration was hard to hide. Wanda shook her hands and let out a slow steady breath. Her fingers returned back to normal and she began to cook breakfast. 

*

You were up but were surprised when someone knocked. You closed the book and stared at the door. Another knock. “It’s Miss. Chavez at your door.” FRIDAY clarified. You jumped, startled by the unexpected voice. “Would you like to speak with her?” The AI asked. Miss. Chavez? You were unfamiliar with the person associated with the name. 

“Uh sure.” You said. 

“Deactivating soundproof.” 

“Hey, it's America.” Oh. America Chavez. “Wanda is cooking breakfast and we wanted to see if you liked to join us.” Your stomach tightened, you weren’t hungry. Years and years of living on the streets and having limited access to food shrunk the size of your stomach. But you didn’t want to seem ungrateful. “If not I can bring some by later if you want to eat in your room.” She gave you an out; an option, a choice. You stood up from your makeshift bed on the floor and put on your gloves; slowly walking to the door. You hesitated as you reached for the handle. Breakfast. It was a simple breakfast with Wanda and America, who you knew. After breakfast, you could hide away in your room. With a sigh, you opened your door. America took a step back as you opened the door wider, she was still in the same clothes from your midnight snack. 

“Morning.” She said with a friendly smile. 

“Morning.” You responded slowly. 

“Breakfast should be ready soon.” She began to walk towards the kitchen. You let out a shaky breath and closed your door, following her. You stopped as the kitchen came into view. You couldn’t help but stare at the red magic coming off of Wanda’s fingers and the kitchen objects danced around in the air. 

“Woah.” You said. Wanda turned around and smiled at you. “Good morning,” You knew the morning greeting was directed at you but you were so fixated on her magic that you didn’t utter a word. Wanda giggled. “I see that we aren’t very talkative in the morning.” You blushed, looking away. 

“Sorry,” You said quickly. “Good morning.” 

“I’m only joking,” The witch said. “Come sit. The eggs are almost ready.” You nodded, quickly and walked over. You sat down, leaving an empty seat between you and America. “How did you sleep?” Wanda asked. 

“Okay,” You answered, it wasn’t a lie but not the full truth. “I need to get used to it I guess.” Wanda nodded. Her magic set a plate in front of you, it had eggs and strawberries on it. 

“It takes some getting used to. It was hard for me when I first moved here.” She placed a plate in front of America too. The contents of her plate mirrored your own plus the addition of sausage. “I wasn’t sure if you prepared bacon or sausage.” 

“Oh.” You weren’t sure either, only having the food a handful of times. “Eggs are just fine, thank you.” The witch nodded, making her own plate she opted to not use her magic. You ate slowly, feeling a knot form in your stomach as you ate. Food was a reward. Your entire life you had to earn the food that was given to you. But you’ve done nothing for the Avengers. 

“Miss. Chavez,” FRIDAY said suddenly. You didn’t jump at the AI’s voice. Improvement. “Mr. Wilson is requesting your presence in the training room stating that you are late.” FRIDAY paused. “He also said if you aren’t in the gym in 4 minutes you will be running until the cows come home.”  

“Shit.” America said, scrambling out of her chair and rushed to put her dirty dishes in the sink. She raced off in what you believed was the direction of her room. She was back in an instant - wearing leggings and a blue T-shirt with a star on it. “Thank you for breakfast, it was amazing. I’ll do the dishes after training. Bye!” She said in one breath as she ran towards the elevator. Wanda laughed as the metal door closed behind America. Your eyes widen at the sudden commotion. 

“I was thinking after we eat I can show you where the library is since we didn’t show you it yesterday.” You perked up at the mention of the library. 

“That would be great. But I can do the dishes so America doesn’t have to worry about them. The witch waved her hand as if it wasn’t a big deal. 

“They can wait till she gets back.” You sighed, resting your head on your hand and moving your fork around your eggs. You had to think about this carefully, the best way to go about this. 

“Can I please do the dishes?” You asked, looking up at her. “I know you told me to just be a kid but I don’t know how to do that right now.” You paused. “I need to feel like I am doing something to earn this. I-” You sighed, frustrated with yourself that you couldn’t say what you were feeling. “Just, please.” Wanda looked at you, deep in thought, but soon nodded her head. 

“Finish eating and we’ll do them together.” You nodded. It wasn’t perfect but you would take it. 

After breakfast was eaten and the leftover food was put away, You filled one of the basins with water and placed the dirty dishes in. You laid a dry towel and put soap on a sponge. The gloves stayed on. “You wash and I dry?” Wanda suggested, slipping another dish in the water. You nodded and began to wash the dishes. You worked in silence, once the dish was cleaned you placed it on the towel for Wanda to dry and put it away. “Do you have a favorite food?” Wanda asked suddenly. The question startled you. “We want to go grocery shopping.” 

“I like fries.” You said quietly. “And chocolate.” Wanda giggled which made your ears turn red. Chocolate reminded you of your brother. It was a rare treat that your parents gave chocolate to him and he would always find a way to slip you some of it. 

“Chocolate and fries, got it.” You smiled and looked into the dirty water. You were brought back to yesterday at the cafe with Natasha sitting in front of you. ‘Your like Wanda,’ she said. ‘Like Kamala and America.’ You weren’t sure if you saw any similarities between your’s and Wanda’s ability. You sighed, scrubbing at the frying pan.   

“Can I ask you a question?” You asked, placing the dish on the towel.

“Of course.” You sighed again, picking up a dish and stared at your reflection. 

“What does your magic feel like?” You asked. You stole a glance at her and she looked confused by the question. “When you use your abilities, what does your magic feel like to you? Like what do you feel?” You elaborated. Wanda didn’t answer right away as she leaned up against the counter and stared at her hands. Her finger tips glowed red. You feared that you crossed a line but she squeezed her hand into a fist and the red magic faded. She sighed. 

“My magic has changed.” She said slowly. “It is connected to feelings and my emotions.” You stopped cleaning and gave your full attention to the witch. “In Sokovia during the war, it was angry, vengeful, and dark. When my brother died and I first moved to the US it was sad and gloomy. The day Thanos and his children came to Earth to get to Vision, it was powerful and strong. But now it's lighter and happier because I’m happy.” Wanda looked at you but you couldn’t keep her eye contact so you looked away, becoming interested in the bubbles in the sink. “So when my magic is all of those things then I feel it too. Does that answer your question?” You nodded and began to clean the dishes again. “Is there a reason why you asked?” You picked up the uncertainty in her voice. 

“I’ve never been around magic like yours before.” You answered honestly. It was the truth. 

“Are you afraid of it?” You almost gave yourself whiplash on how fast you looked at Wanda. 

“No, of course not. You’ve been nothing but nice to me.” She nodded but she had a far off look in her eyes that made you think she didn’t believe you. You bite your lip. “I have a brother. We don’t talk anymore but I miss him.” You said. “What was your brother like?” 

“We were twins. Pietro was older than me, a fact he liked to remind me of all- the time.” You smiled as you listened to Wanda talk about her brother. But an ache in your heart began to form. You missed him. You couldn’t reach out to him because he thought you were dead.

*

Once the dishes were done, you grabbed the book you were almost done with and followed Wanda to the library. It was on the common floor but it was accessible by the stairs that each floor had access to. “It’s mostly empty,” Wanda said. “Steve is the one that uses it the most but he’s away on a mission.” She opened the barn style double doors and allowed you to step in. Your jaw dropped. 

“This is small?!” You gasped. There was a wall that had floor to ceiling windows that overlooked the city and an electric fireplace. A few different couches and seating options scattered around the room. But the best part was the books, bookshelves all around the room were filled. You looked back at Wanda who had a big smile on her face. “This is amazing.” 

“I’m glad you like it. Read as much as you want.” Oh you were going to. “Natasha is in a meeting and I’m free most of the day until training with Vision and Rhodey but let me know if you need anything.” You nodded, making your way over to the couch that was in front of the fireplace and plopped down. 

“Thank you Wanda.” 

“No need to thank me. Enjoy yourself.” She gave you one last smile and left you alone. Before you opened your book, you stood up and walked over to the window to look down at the city below. Everything seemed so small up here. You took the glove off your right hand and looked at your fingertips, electricity jumped from finger to finger. You closed your hand into a fist to smother the charge. When you used your powers, all you felt was pain. 

*

“Have you been here all day?” America asked. You looked over your book and saw her standing in the doorway with two plates. A clock above the fireplace indicated it was 12:30. “Mind if I join you? I come bearing sandwiches.” 

“Sure,” she handed you a plate and sat down in a bean bag. “How was training?’ You asked, taking a bite of the sandwich. It was peanut butter and jelly. America groaned, throwing her head back. 

“Awful. Sam is brutal. My limbs feel like this jelly.” You giggled, the sound surprised you. America seemed just as shocked but she didn’t question it. “Have you read all of those?” She asked, redirecting the conversation, pointing to the stack of books you created on the table. You shook your head. 

“No, this is a stack of books I want to read.” America grimaced. “Not much of a reader?” You questioned. 

“Not really my thing. I find it hard to sit down long enough to finish a book.” You nodded. You knew audio books were becoming more popular but that didn’t feel the same. You enjoyed the feeling of a book in your hands, it was a small reminder that your hands weren’t just used for destruction and pain but could hold an entire world. “Why do you like reading?” She asked. 

“When I’m reading I become someone else,” You shrugged, finishing the rest of your sandwich and placing the plate on the table. “I’m not a homeless teen that is invisible to the world but in these books I’m a hero, a pirate, or an adventurer.” You blushed at the intense look America was giving you. 

“That was really poetic.” The color on your face grew darker. “Find me one.”

“Find you one?” You questioned. America nodded, growing excited. 

“Yes, show me your favorite book and I’ll read it. It may take me forever but I’ll finish.” You smiled and stood up. Tony had a copy of one of your favorite books, The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton. You handed America the book, it was a disheveled copy. The paperback book was well loved in your eyes. She looked it over. “The Outsiders?” You nodded. 

“It’s an American classic but I love it.” 

“I trust you.” She said, opening the book to the beginning. You stared at her, dumbfounded. Such a simple statement. I trust you. But it was words that were never directed at you before, not until this complete stranger. America wasn’t just a stranger, she was your friend. You shook your head and sat back down on the couch and opened your book to where you left off. You both sat in comfortable silence fixated on the world that was being created in front of you. 

*

Natasha was tired, not physically tired but just drained, as she leaned her head against the metal door of the elevator. She didn’t even have to ask FRIDAY to bring her to her floor, the AI just did it. The cool metal offered her some relief to the headache she was getting. The doors opened and she saw Wanda on the couch, a cup of tea in her hands and an episode of The Dick Van Dyke show. As soon as the saw the Black Widow, she paused the show. “Hey dorogoy.” Natasha walked over to the couch and laid her head on Wanda’s lap. Immediately, the witch ran her fingers through her hair. The tension of the day left Natasha’s shoulders. “Long day?” The Black Widow nodded. “Do you want to talk about it?” She shook her head, opening her eyes to stare up at Wanda. 

“I ran into Vision and Rhodey. They said you seemed off in training today. What’s going on?” Wanda rolled her eyes with a huff. 

“Deflecting isn’t going to help.” The Russian smirked. “I could always look.” The witch massaged her girlfriend’s temples. When Natasha first met her, she would flinch every time Wanda raised her hand or got close to her head. But now it was a form of comfort. 

“That would be cheating, malen'kaya ved'ma (little witch)” Wanda blushed. “I’ll tell you what’s wrong then you tell me.” 

“Deal.” Natasha sighed, focusing on the feeling of Wanda’s hands massaging her temples. 

“SWORD identified a large number of people going missing around the Russian and Ukraine border.” She took a minute to collect herself. “It’s not just young girls but boys and younger adults.” The Black Widow felt the pull of her girlfriend’s magic as she began to be sucked into a memory of shipping containers packed with other young girls. “Thank you.” Wanda hummed. “They don’t think it's a Red Room copy because some of these kids return with no memory of where they were.” Natasha reopened her eyes to see Wanda looking down at her with a frown. “They have bruises all over their arms.” 

“Are they thinking it's HYDRA?” Natasha shrugged.

“I’m not sure. Fury has a team looking into it but if they think HYDRA is involved we’ll take it over.” Wanda nodded. “Your turn.” Natasha watched her girlfriend bite her lip. She sat up and took the witch’s hands in hers. 

“Breakfast went well.” She started. “Then America went for training and it was just me and her. She did the dishes but she asked me about my magic. It just got me thinking about everything, you know?” Natasha nodded and began to draw a pattern on the back of Wanda’s hand. “I asked if she was afraid of me.” The redhead tensed up. “She’s not but it made me worry.”

“Do you want me to go talk to her?” Wanda shook her head. 

“No, it's fine. It’s stupid really.” The Solovian looked down. 

“Hey,” Natasha said, using a finger to lift up her head. “It’s not stupid. Your feelings are never stupid.” Natasha knew it was one of her girlfriend’s biggest fears - people being scared of her. The nightmare induced dreams she put the team under by Ultron’s orders, the incident at Lagos, and her brief contact with the Darkhold were not helping deter those feelings. “What can I do? Do you want me to cook tonight after I shower?” Wanda laughed. 

“And have the kitchen catch on fire again? No thank you.” The Russian rolled her eyes but she was grateful to see a smile on Wanda’s smile. 

“It was one time!”

“One time too many.” Natasha stood up and held out her hand. 

“Shower with me then I’ll help you with dinner.” Wanda took her girlfriend’s hand and Natasha pulled her to her feet. “I love you, malysh (baby).” Wanda smiled and kissed Natasha softly. 

“I love you too.”

*

“Hey kid.” You looked up from your book and saw the Black Widow standing in the doorway. Her arms were crossed, she was wearing a sweatshirt, and sweatpants but the biggest thing you noticed was how tired she looked. You haven’t seen the redhead all day. America left the library about an hour after opening her book, having to go to the sanctum to meet with Dr. Strange. She asked if you wanted to come but you declined the invitation. You sat up straighter, placed a bookmark in the book and closed it. 

“Are you okay?” You asked. She seemed caught off guard by the question. But she gave you a tired smile and nodded her head. 

“Just a long day. Wanda is cooking dinner so I’ve been tasked to get you.” You nodded and rubbed your eyes. You stood up and followed the Black Widow upstairs to our floor. “How was your day?” 

“It was fine. Just kept to myself.” You bite the inside of your cheek. “Well America came and visited me, she brought me lunch and I suggested a book for her to read.” Natasha looked at you in disbelief. 

“You got her to sit down and read a book?” Natasha questioned. You shrugged, nodding as you played with a string on your shirt. “I’m impressed.”  

“She suggested it.” You paused. “She is nice. I think she’s a friend.”

“You think?” You looked at the Russian, who had a playful smirk on her face. You huffed, throwing your hands to the side. “I’m just messing with you.”

“I’ve never had a friend before. I don’t know how to be a friend to someone.” You confessed. 

“I think you are doing just fine.” Were you? You’ve done nothing to deserve a friend. Your stomach began to turn and you felt the distinct tingle in your palms. You let out a shaky breath and ran your hands up and down your legs. You noticed Natasha watching you but she didn’t question it as she opened the door to your floor and you stepped around her. The smell of paprika and onions filled your senses. Your stomach growled at the smell. “She’s making Chicken Paprikash, a meal she used to have growing up. Come on.” You rounded the corner to the kitchen and saw America setting up a small table and you walked over to her, grabbing the plates from the counter and placing them in front of each chair. America smiled as her thank you. You looked back at the kitchen and watched as Natasha wrapped her arms around Wanda’s waist, leaning her head against the shorter woman’s shoulder. Wanda laughed and tried to push the Black Widow off of her but Natasha held her strong. 

“Do you want to place the silverware or the napkins?” America asked. Her voice snapped you out of your thoughts.

“Silverware.” You answered and took the silverware from the center of the table. You couldn’t help but glance at Wanda and Natasha in the kitchen. You weren’t used to observing this type of affection. If you didn’t know that your parents were married you would think they were just friends. You rarely saw them kiss or hug. Was this how people in love acted? 

“Are you okay?” America asked. You nodded. “You sure you keep staring at Wanda and Natasha with a weird expression on your face.” You didn’t respond. “You're not homophobic, right?” 

“No.” You said suddenly. Your parents were very religious and they were against gay marriage but you weren’t. “No I’m not, I just.” You sighed. “It’s complicated.” America nodded. 

“Well, if you need a friend to talk about it to make it less complicated. I’m here.” You smiled. 

“Thank you and I’m here for you too. Friends, right?” America smiled. 

“Yeah friends.” 

“I hope we are hungry!” Wanda said, walking over to the table with a large pot in her hands. America placed a pot holder in the center of the table and Wanda placed the pot down. You sat down next to America with Wanda and Natasha sitting across from you. Natasha handed you a water bottle. “Dig in!” America was the first to jump at the chance to fill her plate. You watched as she took a spoon and put some on her plate. She passed you the spoon and you mirrored her actions then passed it to Wanda. This was…strange. You never sat down at a table and passed around a dish. For you, dinner was in your room or brought down to you in the basement. You weren’t allowed to sit around the table for holidays because people from the church would come by. You weren’t listening to the conversation around you and you were thankful that they didn’t try to include you. Your palms began to tingle but it wasn’t a feeling of anxiety or being overwhelmed that was triggering your powers but a rare emotion you barely felt; anger and jealousy. You tried to concentrate on the present. The smell of Wanda’s food. America’s voice as she talked about her visit with Dr. Strange. The feeling of the cool water soothing your throat. But the sound that grounded you the most was laughter. It was a sound so foregin that it caused you to jump at the sudden noise. Your back was to the elevator so you turned around and saw a blonde and brunette staring at you. 

“Oh hi.” The brunette said. 

_____

I hope you like this next chapter! Sorry I’ve been a little MIA, I’m experiencing some burnout which isn’t fun. I have a lot of plans and ideas but I am hoping to put out content more often! 

Thank you for the support! Much love. Arlana

[watercolourferns]

So I got scammed... or at least that's how it felt...

Longer story under the cut.

TLDR: the girl with whom I printed and cut my stickers never told me the files distorted when she tried to make them bigger, so she left them TINY AF, charged me 249MXN (13.76USD), and when I chose the option of refunding me money she offered to give me 22MXN(1.21USD). So I had to reprint them, lost money, and need to repay my mother the money she loaned me to have them reprinted. On top of that, I couldn't sell everything I had and still have stock on them.

To try and regain some of it I'm selling these pride backgrounds I made digitally.

You get all 10 of them for 4USD or whatever else you wanna pay, and there's two different retro inspired designs!

Thank you for your support, being a disabled person my art is my only source of income, so this is quite a big hit to me even if it sounds like so little.

If you don't see a flag you want you can commission it to me for 1USD.

Thank you again for your support!

Now to the cut to read the whole story!

I ordered my pride stickers from a local person who prints and cuts stickers. I can't be cutting stuff without hurting my joints, so I'm ordering my stickers die cut.

Well this girl said it was gonna be 249MXN, which is 13.76USD. first she took two more days than she said she could to print them because apparently there was a problem with her printer. She did tell me this, but she kept on saying "Tomorrow they will be ready for sure!", yet I've been there with commissions, so no biggie as long as they were ready for the 22nd of June. BUT when the stickers finally arrived they were TINY, like REALLY TINY. I asked her what happened and she said "when I tried to make them bigger it got distorted!". She never told me anything about that!

I asked her what could she do about this, and she offered a discount for the next time I ordered with her or a % of the money for refund.

What next time?! She said her printer was having problems, and with how she didn't tell me the files were getting distorted why would I print with her again?!

So I went for the refund... Guess how much she wanted to refund me? 10%, which is 22MXN more or less. which is 1.21USD.

1.21usd of 13.76... I told her no thanks and that she could keep it. I also found out she steals designs to sell in her shop. One of the stickers she gifted me is a stolen picture from pinterest... And I JUST found out her shop is listed as permanently close...

So I had to have them reprinted... so I had to loan money from my mother. I don't want to owe her anything, so now I have to pay her back...

Honestly this is a hard hit because this is the only more or less stable income I have, making art I mean, so if I need to repay loans and stuff I can't have money for my necessities, which are mainly food and rent as I can't even afford my medical bills.

Above I added links to my Kofi shop and two samples of two different designs of pride backgrounds for your phone. I made them retro inspired, and they're only 4 usd for all ten in each design. If you don't get your flag in the bunch you can commission it to me for 1 usd.

Any help rn is very very valuable to me. Thank you so so much for your support.

Happy Pride!!!

[shadowbriar]

Regulus Black - Supermassive Black Hole

Pairing : (F/M) || Regulus Black x Selwyn!Reader Word Count : 4.3k Warning : Curse words. Arguments. Mention of blood and unconscious SH. Synopsis : A simple arrangement turned into an everlasting one as two naïve children try to figure out their heart. Notes : I understand the title makes no sense but I don’t know what else to name this splurge of idea in my head. If you like this story and would like to support me, please visit my kofi page and perhaps get me a coffee?☕

She stares at her own reflection once more, heart pounding as if it’s trying to burst forth of her ribcage. She has spent extra time today, dolling herself up to welcome the big day. The green satin bow, her very first present for her birthday, sits neatly on her hair, making her half up half down hairstyle look more adorable. She smiled to herself before grabbing her satchel and walking out of her dorm room.

People congratulate her right after she steps out of the room. Sixteenth birthday has always been a special one for wizards and witches, especially when you’re one of the Sacred 28 who still very much practice the belief of blood purity. Though her family isn’t as outspoken as the Lestranges or the Malfoys for pure-blood supremacy, the Selwyns still have their bad takes upon keeping the family lineage. She knew that when break comes and she has to return home, her parents must have already arranged parties and soirees to find her the perfect match. Arranged marriages are common for the families of Sacred 28 and she’s been made ready for such disposition to occur.

Though growing to hate the idea of such an arrangement, she understands that being the only child means that there’s no other person her parents could burden their expectations with. The family traditions will be the baton she alone would have to pass down to her children. Given the fact that her parents have given her nothing but love and support throughout her life, she felt that there would be no better requital than to do her duty and marry someone who is on par, if not of better family rank.

Out of all the proud and lofty candidates, one name echoes more in her late night thoughts than the rest. Regulus Arcturus Black. The boy was in her grade, the most reserved and tranquil person of the Slytherin trio, Black, Rosier, and Crouch. He’s the one student every younger student would secretly have a crush on, admiring and praising him in silenced whispers everytime they see him in the corridors. 

Having been close to the Black family did not mean that she was anywhere close with Regulus. Regulus has always been so uninterested and out of touch for as long as she could remember. All these years spent in the Selwyn Manor or back to Grimmauld Place only made her close to the older Black brother. She often wonders if Regulus ever even remotely thinks of her as a friend.

Her bubble of thought burst when her friends swarmed her with hugs and congratulatory greetings as she reached the Slytherin Common Room. Gifts were being given and her lips haven’t stopped saying thank you. She tries her best to show a happy and warm smile though her mind was still wary.

“Happy birthday, Selwyn.” Rosier said, giving her a hug “Sixteen at last!”

She nods, smiling at the hug.

“Welcome to the club.” Crouch says “Any idea who you’re going to marry yet?”

She rolled her eyes, “Hopefully none of you.”

“Oh don’t be too bitter, sweetheart. We’re not all that bad.” Crouch argues, a smug smile plastered on his face “Isn’t that right, Reg?”

Regulus, who was sitting on the sofa with a book in his hand, only hums and nods, not even looking up to see her.

“Don’t you want to say happy birthday to Selwyn, Regulus?” Rosier asked.

Regulus sighs before putting his book down and looking up, forcing a smile, “Happy birthday.”

She stares at him with knitted brows. Regulus’ cold gesture towards her has always been something she could not decipher. She wasn’t sure if he treats all girls this way, she’s never seen him interact with the opposite gender unless it was a classwork project. She wonders if there’s anything she’s done in the past that offended or upset him that much to make him act this way.

“Thanks.” She replied with the same disinterested tone “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have somewhere else to be.”

“Where exactly?” Crouch asks, curious “Don’t you want to spend your birthday with your Slytherinkins?”

She didn’t answer, continuing her pace out of the dungeons. The sight of Regulus being so impassive and the apathetic tone of his congratulatory words seethes her. What exactly is his problem? 

—-

Her head was thrown back, eyes disappearing in blissful laughter. She would miss slow afternoons like this. A couple more week until the break starts and she could already imagine the feverish plans her parents have prepared back home. They’ve sent more frequent letters, giving a little spoiler of the soirees her mother has specially prepared for her. It was as if she was a prized turkey open for auction.

Perhaps finding a husband wouldn’t be as bloodcurdling had she not had her eyes set on someone, especially when that someone had shown her the slightest interest all these years.

She couldn’t tell precisely when the tingling inside her arised. There hasn’t been any difference in him that could provoke such alteration. His gazes are still cold, tone tepid, and gestures so insouciant. Nothing about him has changed over the years. He’s still the very same remote and out of touch Regulus Black. The very boy she’s known of all her life.

Days leading to her birthday only made her ponder more if whoever the man her parents chose to be her husband could ever give half as much emotions as the one she felt whenever Regulus was around. She wonders if the man she was to marry would give her the same butterflies just by glancing at her or throwing her a forced smile. She wonders if the man she’d end up with would ever be able to compete with such magnetism that Regulus has over her. She wonders if she could ever hold such affection for any other guy than Regulus.

Now that she’s finally sixteen and about to come home, perhaps she will get her answer sooner than she’s expected.

“Selwyn,” A voice called, making her turn to the person “A word.”

She raised an eyebrow, certainly not expecting Regulus to come to her table of friends and steal her. The expression her girl friends were having were mirroring hers, completely baffled at the boy’s peculiar approach. What could be so important that the Regulus Black had to come and ask her for a word?

And so she stands from her seat, following the distraught boy outside of the Common Room and into the quieter side of the Slytherin Dungeon. His hair was slightly unkempt, a sight she’s never seen on him before. He was pacing with fists turned into a ball, eyes glued to the ground as if he’s trying to make out words to utter.

“Will you spill your words or am I only being called to watch you pace back and forth, Regulus?” She says, eyes trained on him “What is it, is everything alright?”

“Date me.”

Her jaw dropped, eyes widened at the two words the raven haired boy had just spilled, “Come again?”

“Please don’t make me repeat it.”

She blinks. There was no logical explanation she could make as to why Regulus would suddenly come and ask her to date him. Well, correct that, he wasn’t asking, he was demanding her to date him. Though his words were firm and resolute, the worry radiating from his eyes betrays the resilient bravado he so hard tries to maintain. Never has she ever seen him in such a state and it made her question the true motive of his intention.

“Yeah, not funny, Regulus.” She says, rolling her eyes “Is this some kind of silly bet you made with Rosier or Crouch?”

Regulus’ jaws tensed at the mentioning of his friends, “No.”

“Then why exactly would you come to me and say those words?”

“Because I like you.”

She scoffs. The words rolled out of his tongue with tone as if he was put through a cruciatus curse. Something is evidently amiss. Regulus was never one to struggle with words, never one to look agitated and unsettled. He was not showing the kind of anxiety and nervousness you see from someone confessing their love. No, this was far different than that. It was the kind of convulsion you see from someone who’s trying to hide something.

She rolled her eyes and turned her heels, “I don’t have time for this, Regulus.”

“So is that a no, then?” Regulus asked, stopping her pace “Do you not want to date me?”

“No, I don’t want to date you.” She says, turning herself back to face him.

“Why not?” His brows are now knitted, confused and looking slightly offended.

“Because, Regulus,” She answers with a long sigh of exasperation “Not everyone in this castle finds you attractive.”

She lied. Everyone in the castle finds him attractive. Everyone.

The veins on his neck were more visible now. A wave of disappointment flashed on his face but before she could study it better, Regulus’ gesture turned back to his usual self. As if he’s hit the reset button, his expression turned blank, making it hard for her to read. The muscles on his face relaxed, signifying that he’s gathered himself back.

“So you have someone else you fancy then?”

She remains quiet, eyes still glued on the remaining trace of his perturbed gesture.

“Very well.” Regulus says, taking her silence as his confirmation “I’m sorry to have caused you some inconveniences. Let’s pretend the last twenty minutes didn’t happen.”

Before she could say a word, Regulus was already on his way away from her presence. His pace was fast, long legs taking big steps that would be impossible for her to catch up. Within seconds his silhouette was gone from her sight, leaving her alone at the dungeon with a million unanswered questions swarming her mind.

What’s just happened?

—-

To say last night was agonising would be an understatement. Hypothetical reasons with no real closure were driving her insane. What exactly was Regulus doing? What did he really want with her? He couldn’t just suddenly have the switch of feelings and urge to date her over night unless he was spiked with a love potion, which sounds like the most reliable possibility yet still inadvertently impossible.

And so determined to get her answer, she searched for Regulus at the library. To her delight, she found him within seconds of stepping inside the book room. He was sitting with a book in his hand, eyebrows knitted as his eyes focused on the words of the pages. Whatever the book was, it seemed to occupy his mind so heavily that he hardly noticed her presence.

“Regulus,” She called, making her presence known “We need to talk.”

Regulus looked up, swallowing his saliva at the sight of her, “About?”

“You know what about.”

He sighs and puts his book down, gesturing to her to proceed.

“What in the seven hells were you doing yesterday?” She says, trying her best to keep a low volume as not to anger Madam Pince “Were you drunk? Did someone spike you with some tonic?”

“No, I was fine.” He answers, debunking all her accusations “I only wanted to know if you wanted to date me, is all.”

“Why?”

“Because,” Regulus sighs, biting his lower lip as if debating to continue his words “My parents are arranging me to marry Greengrass.”

Her brows rose, stunned at the new information spilled.

“I was wondering if you’d like to date me so I can stall more time before a marriage happens.” He continues, eyes not looking at her “Sirius has made it clear that he has no interest in getting married soon, especially with anyone my parents chose for him, so my parents turned to me and arranged the marriage. They fear that I might rebel and follow my brother’s missteps.”

She chews on her lower lip, trying to digest his words. Greengrass? She’s surely someone who would be a good match for him. Respectful family, graceful face, and cunning mind. A proper partner indeed.

But why does she feel rather resentful? Shouldn’t she be happy that he’s going to be paired with someone who would be the perfect match for him? It wasn’t like she’s got a chance nor did she intend to proceed with her feelings for him. She was sure that she’s only to admire and love him in silence and were beginning to accept the fact that she has to move on. Now that she’s got a real reason to let him go, why does she feel more hurt than she’s expected?

“Then why did you ask me to date you?” She asks, trying to keep her voice stable so as not to show her quivering heart “Don’t you think that’s a bit cruel to ask a girl to be their girlfriend when he’s betrothed to another?”

“I thought we could pretend to date each other so my parents would call the arrangement off. I mean, it’s a good proposal, don’t you think? I know your parents must be planning for your arrangement too, so I thought we could just date and make them postpone the arrangements.” He continued, sharing his piece of mind “Assuming that you’re not ready for a marriage too, of course.”

“Then why didn’t you just say so? Why did you have to lie and say that you liked me?”

Regulus gulps, regret and guilt filling his eyes once more. Had it not been somewhere public she must've bawled her eyes out. The lies he said yesterday, though she knew full well that it was too good to be true, still pierced her like a thorned rose. Yet with her heart bleeding like this, she finds it hard to hate the man who’s now looking down to his palms as if he’s just found out that he’s got hands. Perhaps he was just desperate and had to say the words out of haste, she tried to convince herself.

“So you don’t want to marry Greengrass?”

Regulus shakes his head slowly, “No, I don’t. And I don’t think I ever would want to.”

She taps her fingers to the wooden table, contemplating the proposal Regulus just offered. It sounded like a decent solution to both of their problems. He wouldn’t have to marry Greengrass and she could have a little more time to breathe, at least until she graduates.

“Look, it was a foolish proposition, I understand. I don’t expect-”

“Fine,” She says short, letting out a long exhale “Let’s do it.”

Regulus raised his brows, “What?”

“I said, let’s do it. It’s a favourable offer for us both, so I’m game.” She says firmly, hands resting on the tables as she leans closer to show her determination “But just so we’re clear, this is business strictly. No emotions, no feelings, what so ever. The second either of us catch it, we’ll tell it to each other and call it off, deal?”

No deal. How could she make such an agreement when she’s already so plastered over him? Perhaps she was saying those words to herself, as a reminder to not fall deeper into the intoxicating force that is Regulus Black. She needed to make it clear for herself that this is nothing close to the relationship she craved to have, that way she could minimise the damage done when things finally come to an end.

“Don’t flatter yourself.” Regulus says coldly, taking out his hand for her to shake “Deal.”

—-

“People are staring.”

“Well that’s the whole point of this display, is it not?”

She glares at Regulus, wanting to push him off of the railway.

The break finally comes. Students are now waiting to board the Hogwarts Express. In contrast to how she would usually have her group of friends around her, she now has Regulus standing beside her, intertwining their hands in the most awkward and uncomfortable grip. The gesture is still very much bizarre for her though they’ve been doing it for almost a week now. Her palms no longer sweat as much as she did the first time, but to say that it’s gotten better would certainly be a lie.

When the train finally comes, Regulus leads her to their booth. The compartment was typically occupied by him and his group of friends, however it seems like they wouldn’t be joining them today. A relief she’s thankful for because she knows she wouldn’t be able to fake intimacy for the next few hours.

“Have you owled your parents?” Regulus asks as he takes a seat “Told them about us?”

She nods, “A couple of days ago.”

“And what did they say?”

“I don’t know, I haven’t opened their letters.” She shrugs, plopping into the seat in front of him “Reckon I could just witness their reactions first hand when we arrive.”

Regulus nods, not uttering another word.

She turns to the glass door, watching as students come in and look for their designated compartments. She could see Sirius and his group of friends walking, flashing a big smile and waving at him as their eyes met. Sirius grins back at her, only to have a sour expression when he sees his younger brother sitting opposite of her. Sirius gave a small nod to Regulus before continuing his walk and following his friends away.

“What was that?”

“What was what?”

“You know what.” She says, sounding irritated “Must you really ask questions you know the answer to? It doesn’t make you seem cool, you know. It makes you look like a twat.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “Why are you asking me? Ask Sirius, he’s the one who seems to have a problem with us being together.”

She shows an annoyed look before turning her eyes back outside.

Regulus turns out to be a more pain in the arse than she’d ever imagined. He acts as if he’s above everyone, giving no remarks nor care to anything she’s said. It was as if he was tortured to be in the fake relationship he himself had proposed. Any moment now she feels like she’s about to burst in vexation.

“We have to talk about what to do during the break.” Regulus says, eyes still glued to his book “I’ll owl you weekly and come to every parties and soirees your parents are holding. I suppose your birthday party is coming, right?”

She turns her head to him, eyebrows furrows, “Weekly? You think that would suffice?”

“I don’t owl anyone so a letter weekly is a luxury.” He said with an adamant expression as he looked up to her “You can send me your letters as frequently as you want but know that I’ll only be replying once a week.”

“You’re impossible.” She scoffs, folding her hands in front of her chest “Daily. You are to owl me everyday. You tell me about how your day went, tell me how much you miss me, how much you miss holding hands with me, and you are to send me flowers. I like orchids, so send me those.”

Regulus remains quiet, watching her intently as if he’s trying to strip her mind. His grey eyes are piercing through her soul. She couldn’t help but to feel intimidated. Her shoulders shudders, gulping in nervousness from the staring contest.

“Fine.” He says at last, closing his book “Any other request?”

She pursed her lips, contemplating, “We have to stop calling each other by our names.”

“What do you mean?”

“Couples don’t do that. They call each other by their pet names.” She says, a slight hint of blush evident on her cheeks “I mean that’s what my friends do.”

“I see.” Regulus nods slowly “I’ll call you motormouth.”

“Motormouth?” She asks, appalled “That’s not a pet name, that’s an insult!”

“Well if you learn to quiet down a bit we’ll upgrade to something more mediocre like Darling or Love.”

“Fine,” She spat in annoyance “Honey Puff.”

Regulus glares, “Don’t call me that.”

“Aw, does my dear lover hate to be called with cute names?” She taunts, faking a cute pout “Should we call you Pooh Bear instead?”

Not entertaining her any longer, Regulus turns back to his book with an annoyed scoff.

She frowns, pulling the zipper of her jumper up to cover her face. The height of nuisance he gave her is beyond her comprehension. How can anyone cause this much distress and nettle? And to make it even more baffling, at the end of the day, right before she sleeps she would play the memory of his detached comments and cold stares with a smile, hoping that she would never get out of such a situation.

The things he’s done to her poor heart.

—-

When they arrived at Kings Cross Station, they were welcomed by one of her father’s right hand men. The three of them, including Sirius, were to go to the Selwyn Manor right away. No further information was given to them, only that a party was being held, awaiting the new couple. The gesture surely raised their eyebrows, but perhaps this is just one of the occasions leading up to her birthday party so neither of the kids asked for more questions.

Arriving at the Selwyn Manor with a portkey, more suspicions and questions rose as the place was decorated extravagantly. The gardens were garnished with colourful orchids, satin covered chairs arranged on the green grass field. This doesn’t look like a birthday nor a welcome party. It looks more of a ceremonial settlement.

“Darling, welcome home!” Mrs. Selwyn greets, pulling her daughter into a warm embrace “It’s so good to see you, my love. And welcome Regulus, Sirius. I hope the journey back was pleasant for you, yes? Your parents are inside, preparing themselves.”

Regulus raised his brows, “They’re here?”

“Well of course they are! They wouldn’t miss their son’s wedding would they?”

“His what?” She asks in surprise, pulling away from her mother’s embrace “Who’s marrying who?”

“You, of course, you silly goose. You’re marrying Regulus.” Her mother teased, poking her daughter’s nose “Did you not read the letters I’ve sent you? Walburga and Orion thought that it would be best to hold the wedding now, seeing that the both of you are already dating, anyway. Your father and I thought the same. We’ve sent the both of you letters but neither of you replied, so we assumed that there was no rejection against the idea.”

She remains quiet, looking at her mother as if she’s grown two heads.

“My darling girl.” Her mother says warmly, looking at her daughter proudly before turning to Regulus with a warm smile “We didn’t need to put you two in an arranged marriage, after all.”

The jaws of the children were hung open, bewildered by the new wave of information.

“I have to get back inside and make sure the catering is ready.” Mrs. Selwyn says before excusing herself inside.

The three children were still frozen, their souls sucked out of their body. She glances at Regulus who looks like he’s been kissed by a dementor. His face was pale, not blinking as he tried to swallow the hard pill.

“I’ll look for Mother and Father, see if they’ve got some better explanations.” Sirius says before getting inside the manor.

When the older boy was gone, she turned to Regulus and called, “Regulus.”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” He cursed under his breath, rummaging his hair as he paced back and forth “What in the holly fuck is going on in our parents’ head?! We’re sixteen, for fuck’s sake! What exactly are they rushing for?!”

“Regulus, quiet down.” She whispers, noticing the stares thrown at them “People are staring.”

“And you,” He turns, finger pointing at her “Why couldn’t you just open the bloody letters? We could’ve avoided this!”

“Me? How is it my fault? You were sent letters too and you didn’t know. I’m not the only party at fault for not being diligent with my post!”

Regulus clenches his jaws in anger. He lets out a small growl, one that made her quivering in fear. She’s never seen him this angry before and it honestly scares her. She isn’t sure on what he’s going to do nor what she should do to help diffuse the tension. The situation they’re entangled in is surely acute but how are they supposed to find a solution if their heads were in turmoil? Is there even a way out from this?

She chews on her lower lip until it bleeds. The bitter taste of iron was strange but it wasn’t enough to wake her from her train of thoughts. She’s too engrossed in thinking and trying to figure out the best way to tame Regulus’ anger.

“Stop, that. Don’t hurt yourself.” Regulus says, noticing the blood coming out of her lips and hands her his handkerchief “Stop mutilating yourself.”

She took the white cloth and pressed it to her lips, his initials were embroidered on one of its corners, “What do we do know?”

“I don’t know.” Regulus sighs, his rage seems to be curbed down a notch “I don’t think we could ever out mind our parents' wicked plans. They’re sick in the head, is what they are.”

“Don’t talk about my parents like that, I love them.” She argues “Even when they’re being dickheads like this.”

Regulus shows an amused smile before taking a hard gulp, “So will you do it? Will you marry me?”

“Do I really have a choice?”

She does. She has plenty of choices. She could just tell her parents the truth about fake dating and everything. Or she could just lie and say that things aren’t working out with the two of them, they’re barely together for a week after all. Or she could simply say no and reject the marriage, let Regulus take the shame alone. But neither of the options above seem to be better than to spend the rest of her life with him. He’s a strugglesome person to bear but does she really have the heart to back out and taint both of their houses?

Regulus nods, his brows still knitted as if he’s unsure if the decision they’ve made were the right one, “Alright, let’s get married, then.”

↠ Part II

[krano-is-straight-from-chicago]

Aichmir's Room - 1st Update

I am gonna make a short update, yesterday I announced the start of a month project. I wanna do this every month this year so I wanted to document my process here. I am gonna start out with a concept board and prep for a stream on my YouTube channel. Starting with reference material, a complete board will be accessible on my Kofi. Lets start with the basic building blocks of my idea. Lets start with the already predefined world. Sunjackers: Art by @askthesunjackers

I will make more detailed notes in the file posted on Kofi later today, however, the basic gist is that a lot of the world in Sunjackers borrows heavily from Brutal-ism. Although I personally feel a lot of sunjackers feels Eourpean to me.

Here are some references from real life that I think get the gist right:

I am personally more interested in looking at how these stylized are used in this context, more of that in my Kofi update later. Ok, we are done with the buildings, please tell me that is it?

u fool.

Remember that car I was had partly modeled yesterday? I went back to look into the make and model of the car to ensure consistency. The car in question is an Alpina B12 850i E31 from BMW in the late 1980s. I felt the car would work best considering Aichmir's background back in the day, and like the boxy nature of it.

It doesn't look completely like a sports car but it still doesn't look like a generic thing from the street. It's got a unique identity and that's why I like it. However, the issue is that well... I have to 3D model it... Cars are really hard to 3D model. I have to also get reference of the inside of the car and then modify the inside to fall into line with how the cars look in Sunjackers. It's interesting stuff. Next I have to break down the idea for the room, the basic layout. I go into this further in Kofi but I like the idea of the two characters living in a reclaimed warehouse, similar to a lot of buildings in the North Side of Chicago.

Lastly, the garage, in the original render the entire inside was based on the idea that the character, Aichmir, lived in the garage while the other character, Astera, lived in the apartment. I like the idea of the garage being a little bit messy but not to the same extent. Maybe a pizza box or two, some trash in the corner ready to be collected the next morning, a cot set up in the corner. Aichmir is obsessed with cars, and pretty much works before she sleeps, wakes up to begin working on the cars again. She might get some money with selling Sun juice, or being a getaway driver, but she spends most of her time with the car.

I will keep the progress of these consistent, not sure if it is gonna be a per day consistent due to commission work. I will try to fill the quiet by posting my backlog onto Kofi and Tumblr.

Thank you for checking this out, if you wanna support me, check out my KoFi! I did a project last month and will be posting it first on Kofi, with a file download option if you are interested.

[aterribleinfluence]

about me !! ★⋆.　✭　

i realized i never did a proper about me so this is my introduction post!

jailedmoonshine ♡ toppedbykakuna

hello!! you can call me alexis or lexi !! i've been a phannie since easily 2013 and i've been using danandphilgames as an emotional support crutch since the gaming channel went on hiatus, so i'm SO happy that they're back and i'm SO happy to be back in the phandom!

i try to tag as much as I can, personal posts will be tagged as #lexis thoughts and any posts about anything other than Dan and Phil will get the #not dnp tag!

♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺(🔴▶🔴)⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡

i have a youtube channel where i make dan and phil compilations! you might have come across dan and phil reminding us that they came out of the closet , or perhaps the week after christmas where i made a dan and phil compilation video daily that i lovingly called Chaosmas ! if not, you can see my recent compilations such as DanAndPhilBAKES or phil's top gaming moments !

♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖⁺(✎📖✒️)⁺˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡

i'm a writer! i have a creative writing degree, a handful of poetry publications, and one selfpublished fictional novella about a young trans girl beginning her transition (it was my first book and i wasn't quite sure what i was doing, so you can only see it if you ask really, really nicely), however i do have two physical poetry books that i wrote and created myself, called incoherence and resilience! incoherence is an honest look into an often unspoken form that ocd can take in a person's mind, and resilience is a handful of poems showcasing the beauty of the queer community. more information about them down the post, or click the links for more info!

i am also dipping back into fanfiction! i'm currently working on a Phil!Vampire AU where Dan is his oblivious roommate for over a decade without realizing he's a vampire, it's gonna be a bit dark and a bit weird and a bit sexy but i think that's the fun of fanfic right? i'm also gonna start a handful of random story ideas and see if any of them speak to me so be sure to keep up with my ao3 account!

♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖⁺(💸🟢💸)⁺˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚

i have a patreon and a ko-fi! i am currently unemployed (and not making any money from my compilations) so any support is hugely appreciated! i am also a poet and an author, any supporters are free to reach out for a free copy of either of my poetry books, incoherence or resilience (click the link to jump to the post with more info!)

i'm taking compilation commission requests! feel free to request anything within reason on my kofi or patreon and i'll dedicate the video to you and your preferred social! i'm still working through a few youtube comment requests, however any payment will get priority! ♡

♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖⁺(🎮🕹️👾)⁺˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡

if anyone wants to be friends on the switch hello i love playing on my switch pls add me! if you play animal crossing, mario kart, smash bros, fall guys or honestly any switch game, come be my friend lets hang out! i'm happy to add discords or snapchats!!

if you made it this far, thank u for ur love and support! i've been having a lot of fun doing this so far and i'd love to keep doing this as long as i can, so be sure to follow for updates on my fanfics and poems, plus i'll be posting new compilations relatively weekly so subscribe over on youtube to see them when they come out! i'm always down to chat or answer questions, my ask box is always open so feel free to come chat!

[when-life-gives-you-lemons-if]

FANGIRLING MOMENT AHEAD!!-!!2))2$

if CC has one fan, it is me. if CC has 100 fans, im one of them. if CC has no fans, i am dead. im ur #1 fan (NOT CLICKBAIT) ok this first part is going to be hella cheesy but i do have some writing questions after (sorry for long ask, idk how to dm on tumblr) onto my appreciation paragraph that i wrote for you: i hope you have a great day, CC. i really enjoy your work and dedication that you put into your writing. i have no money currently so i can’t support you financially yet (like on kofi or patreon) but just know i always read your work and will always be supporting you! i’ve been a fan of your work since i was 14ish? i’m 16 now and your work has inspired me to get back into writing—you’re truly one of my biggest role models when it comes to interactive fiction (which is no easy task, IDK HOW YOU DO IT) and writing in general! thank you for being such a down to earth author. i don’t know much about you personally but i know that writing can be super hard/overwhelming for a lot of people! when days are rough, i hope you can remember this message <33333 i have a lot of questions about writing, specifically your personal experience/journey with writing that i want to ask you, if that’s okay? you don’t have to answer all—you dont even have to answer them if you don’t feel like answering! i would just really like more perspective from authors in the interactive fiction field before i think of starting an IF of my own (it’s intimidating) i think its safe to call this an interview in your inbox

QUESTIONS

how did you begin writing fiction that’s interactive? what about interactive fiction appealed to you?

have you ever written non-interactive fiction works before publishing your interactive novels, or did you choose to go straight into interactive? (p.s. if you have any non-interactive works, SEND THEM MY WAY…please)

kind of adding onto Q2: if you haven’t written non-interactive works before, have you ever considered it?

what age did you begin writing?

do you ever get writers block? if you do, what do you do to get the ideas flowing again?

do you set writing goals for yourself? how do you make sure you stay motivated in order to reach them?

how do you plan your works? is there a specific structure or setup you follow?

i’m a newbie writer, but interactive fiction is really intriguing to me. i would like to ask for your opinion: do you think interactive fiction is a good place to start? or would it be better if i dabble in non interactive fiction first to get the hang of writing in general?

how do you handle overwhelming/overbearing/invasive comments from readers? which are pretty common in the IF community

if you’re an adult, have been to college? and if you dont mind me asking, what’s your degree(s) in? and final question that adds onto this, do your degree(s) involve writing or is writing just a hobby/passion you do on the side?

THANK YOU!

that ended up being longer than i thought, i’m so sorry… anyway, thank you so much for reading my questions (and if you reply, thanks for replying!) i hope you have an amazing year (and life in general.) i’ll never forget the impact your writing has left on me /pos and i’m so sorry if this “interview” is invasive or makes you feel overwhelmed, that wasn’t my intention. i hope you continue releasing books, but just know that it’s okay to take breaks!!!! don’t let the internet hooligans overwhelm you. and if they do, HAVE NO FEAR, J. IS HERE! i will *happily and dutifully* defend you with my life.

Thank you so much. 💕 That is so kind of you. I'll do my best to answer all the questions. 😁

I noticed the age you wrote down and I hope you stayed away from all the mature stuff that I write. 📏🧐

1-answer: Believe it or not TWC was my first experience with IF and while I was reading it, all I could think was how bad I wanted to do something similar, like writing a story that people could interact with and make choices. So I joined the forum, learned choicescript, and started working on my very first game The Burning Sun.

2-answer: No I never wrote any non-interactive stories. Interactive fiction is my first experience with writing for the public. From what I've learned about the publishing industry, non-interactive fiction authors can have a hard time finding publishers, and I don't think I could suffer through that process, it seems intimidating.

3-answer: No I never wrote any non-interactive stories. And I don't think I could write a story where I can't give the readers the option to make their own choices. Interactive Fiction ruined it for me. 😅

4-answer: The same as you, I would say, around 14, 15. But those are stories that stayed in my diaries or notebook and were never shared with anyone else. So Interactive Fiction is my first go at making my stories public, and let me tell you I have so many of them. I hope I'll end up writing them all one day and share them.

5-answer: All the time, why do you think I have so many side stories or other projects. As a writer, you are bound to have writer's block. The thing is when it happens, just don't let it stop you and just find a way to relax, give yourself a break, and do something else that you love doing. I wish I could follow my own advice, but... when I get Writer's block, my brain just defaults to write another story. I had writer's block writing the Midnight Saga, so I went on to write Insert Rich Family because it was a story that was more light-hearted and fun. I had writer's block writing Lemons, so I went on to write The Wedding because I wanted my brain to focus on something else. And the cycle continues.

6-answer: I don't. I'm a very disorganized writer, but... I recently applied to be a writer for Heart of Choice and they asked me for a full outline of a game that I pitched them. BOI did I struggle, because when I write my stories I have no idea what chapter 2 or 3 will look like, I just sit down and write and go with the flow. Having had to make a complete outline for the full game without even knowing what it would look like was tough, but... by the end of it, I loved and enjoyed the process and I think I will apply it in my writing from now on. I think having that bit of organization will help in the long run, especially when I have writer's block.

7-answer: No... I just sit down in my kitchen and write. I have a very active brain, so I'm always thinking and always trying to get stuff done. That's why I can do like 3 months' worth of Patreon content, then take a long break because after such high, I crash, then I get high for writing again, then I crash, lol. ll that to say, it's good to take breaks when you get overwhelmed.

8-answer: It's hard to give you a great answer for this because it will depend on what you like and what you're ready to tackle. I will say that writing IF can be challenging, so if you want to start with IF, start small. Try to code a small story, with just one or two NPCs or ROs beside the MC. See how you manage the branching and the development. Don't start big because coding different branches for different interactions can spiral out. I can't really say much about the non-IF part, but I think all IF stories start as non-IF. They only become IF when you start adding choices and branches. 💕

9-answer: I've been fortunate to stay out of some drama here on Tumblr, although my first one did cause me to get blacklisted and blocked from some authors and IF recs. OG readers will know what I'm talking about, and no I don't want to dig out that drama.

I'm grateful for the followers that I have and for every reblog, like, comment, and recommendation. I feel like I'm slowly getting some recognition and that is why I can spot new readers based on their asks. Some people might think I'm new, but no. I've been here a while, just took me some time to make it to your FYP. So how do I handle overbearing or overwhelming comments or asks? If it's something that I feel uncomfortable answering, I just block and delete it. If not, I answer it the best I can because sometimes people may be asking a genuine question, but in writing it, it might come off as rude. So, it's really a case-by-case judgment.

10-answer: Yes, I'm an adult, a millennial. 😭 so old. I went to college in my home country, Haiti, and my degree is in business administration. Nothing to do with writing. My current job which I will lose soon is in Human resources, so writing is just a hobby. But I would love to be able to do this full-time.

Thank you for all the questions and I hope your 2024 continues to be great. 🥰💕