#dude deserves every good thing that’ll ever come his way

[theexhaustedqueer]

shoutout to my ex boyfriend for that time he asked me if we could “act more like a couple” and i had an immediate knee jerk, angry, reaction to that idea and STILL didn’t cotton on to the fact that i was aro. bestie I’m so sorry you deserved better.

[tinyyoungblood]

hi!! adore your work love. could you maybe do smth where stark!reader has to get her wisdom teeth out but HATES the dentist so she brings her boyf peter and her dad w her?? and then when they get home the avengers are all waiting with like comical amounts of flowers and stuffed animals and then reader says some funny shiii and thor thinks she’s like dying lol. idk if that made sense but i’m getting my wisdom teeth out soon and i’m scared😭 thank u so so much love u babe

pairing: peter parker x stark!reader

a/n: tysm lovely :,) i rushed through this like my life depended on it, but i hope i’m not too late. either way, i hope you’re okay! it’s frightening but those bad boys gotta go because we don’t need that kind of energy in our lives. enjoy x

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

wisdom teeth? more like wisdoom

y/n has to get her wisdom teeth removed and it’s the singular most dreadful thing she’s ever had to do, which says a lot because her dad is tony richling stark

doing dreadful things she doesn’t want to do but still somehow end up doing just because she can is a personality trait at this point

no one really makes a big deal out of it since ~death~ is part of their job description, but y/n is terrified

and when a stark is terrified the only thing that will keep them one step from insanity is researching the hell out of it

that information will be info dumped into every conversation for the next few weeks leading up to the appointment

“y/n you need anything from the store?” "no thanks, did you know the side effects of getting your wisdom teeth out include ✨sudden death or blood clots✨ tho” “……..i have a coupon?”

the day of the appointment, peter comes along and literally doesn’t let go of y/n’s hand. he keeps touching her to let her know that he’s there and it’s so. adorable

he would rest his hand on her knee, gently stroke her back while holding her, or just play with her hair

happy drops them off and he’s too Cool™ for emotions but he knows y/n’s a wreck, so he just fist bumps her with a single nod and she almost breaks down bc it’s really affectionate

y/n is sitting in the dentist chair and genuinely nothing is happening yet, but she’s squeezing peter’s hand like it’s a sponge

peter might have a high pain tolerance but he’s in pain pain and he prays that his hand won’t just explode on him

the dentist notices how peter tries to keep it together and chuckles

“you okay there, son?” “yea it’s fine, had a better time when a building fell on me tho haha” “pardon?” “oh i mean i didn’t have a good time, i just had a better time”

because y/n is running Anxious Town™, the dentist gives her a sedative to help her relax 

plus, an injection of local anaesthetic to numb the tooth and surrounding area

she doesn’t feel anything and it’s GREAT

the procedure is quicker than expected and now the real fun begins

she tries to walk but she falls down so peter scoops her up bridal style and happy stays glued at her side

y/n doesn’t mind although she literally doesn’t recognise them and they’re practically strangers to her

but girly sees an opportunity and tries to flirt with peter bc why wouldn’t she

“you’re pretty” *blushes* “why thanks” “you should let your girlfriend know” “i should let her know i’m pretty?” “so you do have a gf? :(” “yea it’s you” “:)”

they stop for gas and peter goes in to get some water for y/n, and in her infinite wisdom, she decides it’s burger time

her mouth is completely numb and she’s practically leaving a trail of drool behind her, but she’d kill for a burger right now

so she wobbles around aimlessly for an hour on some random parking lot as if the ground might just magically open up like a rabbit hole and lead her to five guys

she’s going places. not back to the car. definitely not five guys. they’re closed. but places

peter finally finds her and he’s drenched from head to toe in sweat. he doEsn’T wAnt tO tALk abOut iT tho so she lets him take her to subway instead

normally, she would know that peter’s usual subway order is bread-lettuce-jalapeño

but in her drugged-up state, it had simply slipped her mind so now she’s staring at him like he’d just murdered someone right in front of her

“that- that’s your order?? no meat or anything just bread, lettuce, and a little spice?”

meanwhile at the compound, sam and steve are ordering everyone around bc they want to decorate this place before y/n gets home to surprise her

they take it very seriously too. they’ve watched like one HGTV show and said it’s our time

they finally get home and tony gives y/n a big hug, asking her what took so long

happy tells him that she was keen on getting burgers bc apparently someone has taught her that stressful times call for ~cheeseburgers~

he proceeds to look at tony with a pointed look

tony just shrugs and goes “she was a problem child. we don’t mention her dark past”

she’s swaying on the spot and keeps grinning like a fool and thor just stares at her weirdly before elbowing bruce and whispering loudly,

“what’s wrong with her? is she dying? should i start collecting leaves, i know this remedy—"

no one can tell if y/n is just happy to see the newly decorated home or if she’s just delighted to see everyone but then she goes around hugging the entire team

she doesn’t even acknowledge the sky-high pile of teddy bears and flowers everywhere bc she’s just squeezing everybody

y/n is so high, she just starts to spill all of her feelings about everyone and they’re already so overwhelmed by the hug chain they can’t take this too

“wanda i just want you to know that you’re like my big sister and you’re always taking care of me and i know you and vision are just going to make such good parents one day”

“bucky you absolute PRICK, you FIEND, you’re the best chess player ever and that’ll never change and i wouldn’t be good without you, i hate to say it but you deserve happiness even after you made me lose five times in a row yesterday”

“dad, you’re so strong and smart, even though we’re like never on the same page, you’re always along for the ride, i want to be like you when i grow up, i swear i’m gonna try to be as good to the avengers as you were to us” “aww- wait makes you think i'll be the first to die“

“nat you’re such a bitch about your protein shakes but you’re my best friend and i wouldn’t have it any other way, you can try out as many make up looks on me as you want”

“bruce, brucey, i would live with you in your lab for the rest of my days if i had to, whenever you ask me to hand you stuff i feel useful and important”

“laura’s way out of your league clint i have no idea how the fuck you got her but don’t lose her and i want to be your next child’s godmother”

“steve…we’re your family now. we’re always gonna be your family now. okay?”

“loki you’re not fooling anyone with your attitude, we all know you’re part of the family, you were just misunderstood and messed up bc of your dad–FUCK him by the way–but i realised everyone deserves as many chances as they need because of you”

“sam i would genuinely kill anyone who wronged you, even if they cut you in line at the grocery store, i would knife them no hesitation”

“thor, you poor golden retriever have been through so much, on my way here i made a wish on an eyelash for you bc you deserve better, your postcards always make my day, love you”

she mumbles something to peter that no one else can hear but he blushes and chokes back a sob

y/n orders hot soup and bucky brings it to her but before he even has time to react peter drops everything and ZOOMS across the room in .3 seconds

he barrels into bucky so hard they both go flying, but peter just smoothly rolls out of it and onto his feet like some kind of super ninja

“DUDE WHAT THE HELL” “😠 y/n is not supposed to drink hot liquids 😠”

all of this happens in mere seconds but sam has filmed it all and now slow mo clips go viral online of some mysterious kid knocking over the winter soldier

y/n’s a little in and out after that, but when she fully regains consciousness, she’s on a pile of blankets, surrounded by the team on the floor <3

* * *

let me know if this is actually comforting lmao stay hydrated pals

hc masterlist

[sciderman]

Ooooo I really really really like ur au! Can we have a little more of it plz??

Thank you so much!! There’s some more under the cut! Peter Parker not being alone in high school and having a friend?? It’s what he deserves. 

-----

“Wanna skip?” 

“Wade, I know we met at the principal’s office, but you have to know – I don’t make a habit of getting into trouble.” 

“Sure, and I get that the goody-two-shoes routine worked for you before – but the streak is broken, dude. Now you’re a ne’er-do-well. Like me.” Wade laid out a big grin on his face. “Embrace it. Embrace your destiny.” 

Peter looked at Wade incredulously.

“That’s a no, isn’t it?” 

“That’s a no, Wade.” 

“Guh. You’re so boring.” Wade resigned, throwing his head back. “Fine, whatever, if you honestly want to spend last period talking about your feelings to some sweaty creep who gets off on kids’ misery then that’s your business.”

Peter groaned. He had completely forgotten about his appointment with the student councillor. That was the last place he wanted to be right now. 

Wade could sense it, and his grin grew before Peter finally gave in. 

“Destiny comes for us all” said Peter, in defeat.

----------------------------

“If you could have a superpower,” Wade asked, mouth full of dollar store candy, “what would you pick? Like, invulnerability? That’d be pretty sweet. Or like, super-speed – ” 

“How about super-smarts? It means that pretty much every power is possible because you can just invent some kind of super-armour that makes you invulnerable. Or super-fast.” 

“So you’re pulling a genie ‘wish for more wishes’ manoeuvre. Weak.” Wade turned up his nose, “I mean real actual superpowers. Besides you’re like, already way super smart.” 

Peter beamed, but it fell with a realisation. His grades had been dropping. He was barely passing anymore. Brightest kid at Midtown one week, and all of a sudden he was lagging behind. His tutors could attribute it to him grieving, but the fact was he’d been declining ever since the fateful day he’d visited Oscorp. 

Suddenly there were way more important things in his life. At least, they seemed more important, at the time. 

“My grades could hardly attest to that.” Peter said. 

“You’re kidding. You used to be like a straight-A brat. Everyone hated you because you were so smart. Always at class early. Always like, freshly sharpened pencils at the ready when the teach walked in.”

Peter looked down. Though he remembered, he hardly felt at all related to the kid Wade was describing. Peter wondered if he could ever be that kid anymore. 

“Hey, I get it.” Wade said. “When my mom passed, my whole life was over. Still is. I don’t know if it’ll ever get back into whack. It’s like a bombshell lands on you and you’re somehow expected to just. Get on.” 

Peter swallowed. “Yeah. That’s...” He said quietly. Words weren’t coming easily. “I… I didn’t know. When did...?” 

“Eh, I was like, four.” Wade said, surprisingly nonchalant for the subject matter. “She was the only good thing in my shitty world. And now I hardly remember her. She’s just... gone. And she’s left this huge massive hole in my life that’ll never heal. All from someone I can hardly remember.” 

Peter watched silently as Wade ran a hand through his hair, bowing his head. 

“They say that like, it passes and eventually you can move on with your life. They say that. Like, therapists and stuff. You know…” Wade paused, looking at Peter, “idiots.” 

Peter scoffed just a little, before he frowned again. Only fifteen, and he was already getting frown lines. 

“You might not be the same Peter Parker again, Peter Parker. But you’ve gotta know this new Pete’s just as good.” 

Wade’s mouth found a smile again, the one so contagious that it tugged on something in Peter’s chest every time he saw it. 

“In fact, he’s better. Because he’s friends with me.”

[pretend-writer]

Demolition Lovers (Hargreeves x sibling!reader)

Summary: Klaus and Y/N helps their brother, Luther find a perfect date.

Title Reference: Demolition Lovers x My Chemical Romance

Word Count: 1.6k words

Warning: swearing, mention of sex

✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤

It was a typical day at the Hargeeves mansion. Klaus and I hanging out as we lay across the couch next to each other, scrolling through our social media and sharing celebrity gossips that was trending that day.

Diego would then barge in, bothering us to get up and be productive but then end up eaves dropping and joining our conversation.

Then we'd have Vanya that'll feed us our daily snacks. She was like a mama bird; Hearing the rest of us complaining and bickering then feeds us the goodies to shut our mouth. It honestly worked every time and now I start to wonder if that was her trick all along.

After our snack was nap time, where Klaus and I would lay there for two to five hours, usually get up when the sun was down. Then we would plan our night, typically out for dinner or a night out if it was the weekend.

But our schedule, our precious paradise time was ruined by the one and only. Luther Hargreeves.

It wasn't supposed to be this way; Allison would go out to run errands, Ben worked all day like the responsible man that he was, and Five would just be Five, roaming town and doing God knows what. Luther would be home to research and dig through dad's old stuff.

Today however, wasn't the case.

He instead came in during mine and Klaus' precious nap time, groaning and yappin' about some girl on an app. Didn't know why he had to do this in the family room but there he was.

'Do you not see us sleeping here?' I complained as I lifted my head from the pillow, trying not to move a lot so that Klaus could stay asleep.

'Sorry, sorry. I didn't mean to be loud.' He apologized as he stared at his phone, depressed and upset.

Klaus rolled his eyes. 'Well you are and you're still here.'

Luther froze in place, continuing to stare at the screen. Klaus and I looked at each other, nudging one another to see who was going to talk to him first.

The both of us got up, sitting down side to side as we looked at Luther and back at each other. Klaus seemed like he was unbothered, so I sighed and broke the silence. 'What's wrong buddy?'

'Nothing.' Luther frowned.

Squinting my eyes, I grabbed the pillow from the couch and threw it on Luther's head. 'You bitch! You woke us up from our nap and you're going to say "nothing" is bothering you?'

'Ow!' Luther rubbed his head. 'Okay, okay. Damn. It's this girl on tinder, she doesn't want to go on a date with me.'

'Well, what did you tell her? Did you say something stupid?'

Luther got up, 'See. This is why I didn't want to tell you guys becau-'

'Sorry, sorry.' I stood up and pulled Luther back onto the couch. 'Mind if I see the conversation?'

His face immediately turned red, 'Uhm. Do you have to?'

'If you want me to figure out why she's turning you down, yeah.'

Hesitantly, he pulled up the messages he had with the girl and then passed me the phone. Scrolling through the messages, I shook my head. 'Luther, she's DTF.'

'Yeah, I know that's why I don't understand why she turned me down. She brought it up first.'

Klaus blinked, 'What do you think DTF stands for?'

By the look on Luther's face, I knew he was confused. He looked over at the ceiling, thinking for a while before he replied to Klaus. 'Don't tell me I was wrong this whole time.'

'So what do you think it says?'

'Uhm... Date This Friday?'

Klaus awed, shaking his head as he left my side and took a seat next to him. He wrapped his arms around Luther, 'Buddy. No. That's not what it stands for. But that's cute of you.'

'Wait, huh? So this whole time me and her were on the wrong page? What did she mean then?'

'She wanted to fuck you.' I blurted, I felt bad that Luther was so confused. 'It stands for Down To Fuck.'

It was a dead giveaway that he had no clue what his whole conversation really meant, his whole face turned redder than ever. He buried his face into his hands. 'Oh no.'

'I didn't think you were talking to girls, honestly.' Klaus chuckled. 'You clearly got game, your noggin is just a little... outdated.'

'I got what? Game? No, I just deleted Candy Crush, it was too addicting.'

Klaus kept his laugh in, curling his lips as he slowly nodded back at his brother. 'Oh my gosh.'

✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤

It had been about two weeks, helping Luther get a dream girl that he deserved. Despite Luther being the annoying sibling, he had been there for me countless times and I wanted nothing but the best for him.

We've tried talking to the girls on the app, few weren't looking for anything serious, some trolling in the messages. After constant matching and messaging, Luther found someone he potentially saw a relationship with.

'Did you check your message from Claire yet?' Klaus asked.

'No. I'm kind of nervous, actually.' Luther laughed a little under his breath, shaking his legs as he gripped onto his phone.

Resting my hand on his shoulder, I reassured him. 'Don't be nervous, I'm sure she said yes to your date.'

Luther sighed, turning on his phone and scrolling through his messages. As his face lit up, he jumped off his seat. 'She said yes!'

Klaus got up and cheered, hugging Luther tightly. 'I knew it! So what time and where?'

'Ah- Uhm. Why... do you need to know?' Luther paused.

'Cause we're coming to watch.'

'No, no, no. I don't need you two spying on me. I'm already nervous as it is.'

'Yeah, Klaus let's just let him be. He's a big boy now.'

'But-'

'Let's give him the space he needs, Luther definitely needs his alone time with his girl.'

Klaus rolled his eyes, 'Okay. Have fun and tell me everything when you get home.'

A smile hasn't fade away since he saw the text; He was grinning widely than ever, never seen him this happy in my entire life. 'This is going to be so awesome!'

'Good luck buddy.' I smiled as I watch him do his little happy dance going up the stairs to get ready.

Klaus groaned, crossing his arms and pouting like a little child. 'Why can't we go spy on Luther?'

'But we are. I just wanted him to think we weren't.' I wanted nothing but the best for Luther, if it meant that he was going to have a perfect night with his perfect date, I was going to be protective of my brother.

'Perfect! I need to get my spy gear on.'

✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤

With the binocular in my hands, I looked into the restaurant Luther picked for the both of them. 'Oh my gosh, he looks so cute with his little bow tie.'

Luther was blushing, talking nervously with Claire. It seemed like it was going well, no awkward moment or embarrassing moment between them.

I looked over at Klaus, who was being too quiet next to me in the passenger's seat. He had a rather thick file in his hand. 'What are you reading?'

'Claire's life.' Klaus chuckled. 'She's smart as hell, really pretty. I'd say we did a pretty good job helping Luther.'

'How did you get a file on her life?'

Klaus smiled innocently, 'Ah. I followed Diego into his ex's job and got Ben to steal it for me.'

'You what?' I leaned my head back, staring at the car ceiling as I sighed. 'Klaus, Eudora is my friend. If she finds out that you stole someone's files from the police department, she'd hate me.'

'My bad, Y/N. If it makes you feel better, Ben rejected me a bunch of times. I made a deal with him that he could take over my body for three hours for the files.'

'Whatever.' Looking through the binoculars again, I asked him another question. 'So you didn't ask Diego to get it for you?'

Klaus shook his head. 'Nah, if I ever told him I knew he'd want to come with us to stalk Luther. I wanted some Klaus Y/N alone time.'

'Aw.' I said but immediately stopped. 'Are you saying this to make me forgive you?'

'Is it working?'

'Depends how the night goes.' After a sarcastic smile, I snatched the file off of his hand. 'Why did you want to steal this anyway?'

'You ask so many questions.'

'I know.'

It was rare for Klaus to do "the responsible thing", that was more of a me, Allison or Five's criteria. I couldn't think of a possible reason why he'd go out of his way to take a file to investigate on this girl.

'It's Luther, you know. I wanted to make sure he was going out with someone that won't screw him over again.'

'That's the nicest thing you've ever said.'

'Luther better appreciate this because I'm not going to jail for this shit.'

I smiled at my brother. 'Don't worry. I gotchu.'

A loud scream came from the entrance of the restaurant, Luther approaching us quickly as he eyed the both of us.

'Duck!' I yelled at Klaus as we tried to hide ourselves from his sight.

'Don't bother. I saw you guys from the restaurant!' Luther said as he knocked on the window. 'Why are you guys here? You told me you wouldn't come.'

'I know, I know.' I rolled the window down and squealed as I reached for his bow tie. 'I just couldn't resist! You look so adorable, brother.'

He grunted, 'Stop. Guys go home, you're going to ruin this date with the woman that I love.'

'Woah! Love!?' Klaus and I said in sync.

Luther covered his mouth. He mumbled into his hand. 'Pretend I didn't say that!'

'Pretend?' I laughed, 'Luther. I can't pretend, I'm sorry. That was sort of funny. A little little little bit cute but mostly funny as hell.'

Klaus reached over me to grab onto his hand. 'Dude, you're already whipped but that's okay. But Y/N's right. It's a bit funny not going to lie.'

'I'm whipped?' Luther cocked his head. 'I don't do that sort of foreplay during se-'

'Luther, that's not what it means!'

[alsaurus-loves-dean]

What Dean Has To Say a destiel fic by alsaurus | rating: T | word count: 3.8k When Cas comes back, he disappears.

He’s supposedly still in the bunker. According to Sam, he doesn’t seem to have left the building at all since he arrived.

Dean wouldn’t know, because Cas is avoiding him.

It’s the only explanation. Why else would it be impossible to find his best friend even though they’re under the same roof 24/7? Not that Dean has really gone looking for him, but still. They haven’t crossed paths once since Cas got back three days ago. This wouldn’t be so weird on its own (yes it would), except Sam sees Cas all the time. So what gives?

Dean knows what gives, but at the same time? He doesn’t really. Cas is obviously reluctant to talk to Dean after what he’d said to trigger his deal with the Empty. He’d said all that under the assumption that he’d never have to face a response. Dean understands. He would definitely feel the same if he were in that position. But Cas? Cas is the bravest, purest, and most sincere person that Dean has ever met. How could someone like that be afraid to talk to someone like Dean?

This isn’t how Dean had expected this to go.

He’d wanted Cas back more than anything he’s ever wanted in his life. He’d never felt joy the way he felt when he saw Cas out of the Empty, back in the bunker where he belonged. Dean knew he needed to be with Cas, that Cas was it for him.

But he’d also kind of assumed that Cas would take the lead, here. Cas, who was so straightforward and free of human insecurities, would be the one to bring it up - if only just to assure Dean that nothing had to change. Then Dean would have the perfect opening to tell him he felt the same. If words failed him in that moment, Dean was also prepared to let his body do some of the talking.

Dean had not imagined that Cas would just straight-up hide from him for days on end. It’s frustrating, but also a little endearing.

Okay, it’s a lot endearing. Very endearing. Some might even say it’s adorable. Not Dean, though. Sure, Cas is so flustered at the idea of talking to Dean about his feelings that he literally won’t show his stupid angel face - so what? What’s even cute about that?

Anyway.

Dean is starting to get antsy about the whole thing. He’s not exactly anxious, but he’s so amped up that his body interprets it as anxiety. He had to cut down on the caffeine because he’d started to feel like he was vibrating out of his skin. For someone Dean never sees, Cas sure does occupy a whole lot of space in Dean’s head most of the time. He finds it difficult to really focus on anything else, so he’s watched a LOT of movies the past few days - just zoning out with only half his attention on the screen.

“Why are you sitting here in the dark by yourself?” Sam asks from the doorway, making Dean jolt in surprise.

Dean hadn’t realized he’d turned the TV off after Dirty Dancing had ended. He really is just sitting in the Dean Cave, in the dark, by himself. Awesome.

“What‘s it to you? And who am I supposed to be sitting with, anyway? Not like Cas wants anything to do with me,” Dean grumbles. Laying it on just a little thick, since he knows better than Sam why Cas isn’t here.

“What is up with you two, anyway?” Sam asks, and it’s obvious that he’s been waiting for the opportunity to do so. He flips the light switch and comes to sit in the other chair. He’s perched on the edge of it, leaning towards Dean as if to signify how very important he finds this conversation. How he’s not going to let Dean out of it.

Fine.

“Cas is just being a baby. He thinks he can just confess his undying love for me and peace out, and then once I rescue his ass he can just avoid dealing with the whole thing,” Dean starts. Then he finds he doesn’t want to stop, despite Sam’s eyes going wide in shock. “Seriously, man, I don’t know how much longer I can take this. Like how long am I supposed to wait? We should have spent these whole three days in bed doing all kinds of freaky shit - but look at me, Sam! I’m sitting alone in the dark without even realizing it because the dude lives rent free in my freakin’ head!”

“Umm,” Sam says.

“I get that he’s nervous, but so am I! I mean, he’s the one whose cards are already on the table. I’m the one who has shit to say! I don’t even know if I’ll be able to say it, but I’ll never find out if I never even see the guy!”

“Okay, hold on. Just a minute. You’re saying that Cas told you...?”

“Yeah.”

“That he - “

“Yep.”

“And you want to say it back.”

“Sure. If you wanna call it that.”

“Come on, Dean.”

“I mean yeah, Sam, what do you want me to say? I have no idea how it’ll go down. I still haven’t seen him since we got him back.”

Sam starts to smile, and Dean doesn’t like the look of that.

“So what, he’s avoiding you because he’s scared of what you’ll say?” Sam asks.

Dean shrugs.

“I guess. Why else would he avoid me and not you?”

Sam’s smile grows as he sits back in the chair, settling in. He watches Dean for a few moments, eyes twinkling like he’s about to say something really stupid. Why did Dean think that opening up about this would be a good idea?

“That’s actually kind of cute,” Sam says.

Dean rolls his eyes so hard he has to throw his head against the back of the chair.

“Don’t you start with that!” Dean groans. “It’s not cute, it’s annoying. It’s cowardice, is what it is!”

“Have you tried to find him?” Sam asks. The smirk on his face tells Dean he knows the answer but is asking just to be a little bitch.

“Shut up. Why does it have to be me, huh? Why do I have to be the one to bring it up?”

“I didn’t say you had to bring anything up. I just mean have you tried to talk to him at ALL? You say you haven’t seen him, but have you looked for him?”

Dean has not. But -

“I already looked for him, in the Empty! And I pulled him out. It was a whole thing! I think the ball’s in his court now.”

“Dean, think about it. You have a lot more experience with this kind of thing than he does,” Sam reasons.

It’s true. But at the same time -

“I have never experienced anything like this. Ever. Especially not with a dude,” Dean says. He feels out of his element, too. That’s why Cas was supposed to take charge! (Dean knows that doesn’t make sense, and he doesn’t care).

The smile on Sam’s face turns gentler, any trace of teasing disappearing.

“I’m surprised you’re even telling me all this,” Sam says.

“Sam, come on,” Dean protests, because he really doesn’t want to get into it.

“No, really! In the past you’ve been… very adamant about being straight.” Too adamant, is what Sam means. He’s not wrong.

“What’s your point?” Dean asks.

“I’m just glad this is happening, I guess.”

Dean can’t help but melt a little at that sentiment. Inwardly. On the outside, he’s still trying to act put out, but the longer he sits there trying not to confide in Sam, the stronger the pull to do so becomes. Like being caught in a wave, Dean finally lets it pour through him.

“It’s Cas. You know? It’s Cas. I spent too long worrying about all that. I’ve lost him too many times, Sam. I can’t really care about all that stuff anymore. So I just want him to know, you know? I don’t want my crap to keep Cas from getting what he wants. He deserves to get everything he wants. He can have it. I want him to have it. And I want him to know that.” Dean stops. Takes a deep breath, because that was a lot. Then he wraps it up. “And that means you’re gonna have to know at some point anyway, so. There you go.”

Sam looks shocked again, but in a totally different way that Dean doesn’t recognize at all. Which makes sense, considering this is the first time Dean’s ever admitted to having gay feelings for an angel of the Lord. It’s an unusual situation.

“That’s amazing, Dean. Seriously. I’m really, really happy for you,” Sam finally says.

Dean can tell he means it. He’s actually not sure he’s ever seen Sam so sincerely pleased. But Dean frowns at that last sentence.

“I don’t know what you have to be happy about just yet. Dude won’t even talk to me.”

“You said yourself that you haven’t even tried!”

“Yeah but I can take a hint, man. He doesn’t want to see me. Otherwise he’d have seen me.”

And it boils down to that, Dean realizes. Because while he understands that Cas is reluctant because he’s afraid, Dean is also hurt. It’s irrational, but he wants Cas’ love for him to be stronger than that fear. He aches for Cas every moment of every day and every night. He’s barely functioning because he feels like his entire existence is on pause - he hadn’t expected to be in this prolonged state of limbo. He’d been ready for Cas. But it turns out he’d been ready for a different Cas, one he’d thought up in his head - because the real Cas, the Cas he loves, is too afraid to face him and Dean has no idea how long that’ll last. He has no idea when or even if Cas will come to him. Every moment that passes could be the moment before Cas finally talks to him. It’s agony. It’s wonderful.

But he meant it when he said that Cas deserves everything he wants. So why should Cas have to seek it out, when Dean could just give it to him?

“I need to find him, huh,” Dean says, and it’s not a question.

“Yeah, man. You should do that,” Sam agrees. There isn’t an ounce of admonishment in his voice. He’s just supporting Dean, and for once, Dean is grateful.

“Thanks, Sammy,” he says,

Time to find the angel.

concluded in chapter 2. read the rest on ao3.

[rk1kheadcanons]

Markus and Connor are secret dating b/c Connor doesn't wanna be out to the world yet. The Jericrew (-Connor) go drinking and Markus gets *drunk* and starts rambling about his boyf after he rebuffs an advance made by a lady at the bar super sappily, but no matter how hard the others press him, they just get "oh, his eyes are the color of warm chocolate..." answers as to who this boyf is

You would never know Markus was drunk.

He didn’t stutter or slur when he spoke, he didn’t sway or trip over his feet. He didn’t giggle goofily or speak overly loud. He was perfectly composed, as much the charismatic android sober as he was when he was intoxicated.

What he did do, however, was go on long monologues like a Shakespearian stage actor.

Which would be fine, if Markus’ favorite subject to wax poetic about wasn’t his mysterious boyfriend, whom he’d sworn not to reveal the identity of until they were ready. Which would also be fine, if that mysterious boyfriend wasn’t Connor, who was often sitting right next to him (and slowly but surely bluescreening his way into that big Windows XP wallpaper in the sky) as he sang and lathered compliment after compliment, steadily giving away clues that were so blatant that it was a miracle that no one had figured them out yet.

Markus never remembered what he’d done the next day, and whenever Connor mercilessly played back his memories, his poor lover was as embarrassed as he was apologetic. Connor could hardly begrudge him (frankly he didn’t know what sane person on this planet could ever begrudge Markus, but that was just Connor’s correct opinion). What could they even do about it? Should he demand Markus consciously control himself? It wasn’t like Connor was any better at it. Give the RK800 too many AMB’s (Adios Motherboards) and he would be on top of the nearest table and scream-singing his every professionally repressed emotion, regardless if it was a karaoke bar or not. Hence why he never imbibed more than he could handle when they were around their friends. The last thing he wanted to do was sloppily propose to Markus after a long and terrible rendition of K-Ci and JoJo.

And Connor wouldn’t dream of telling Markus to measure the contents of his drink like Connor did. Not when his breaks were so rare, and getting him to relax and let loose was like pulling teeth.

It was just in the cards that their big revelation as a couple would be in a random bar at 3AM, with Markus saying something along the lines of “my boyfriend’s name starts with a C and rhymes with Donner”, and Connor had made peace with that.

“Scarlet woman!” Markus cried, at some random bar at 3AM, surrounded by their drunken comrades. Ah, would this be the night? Connor thought, on the correct side of buzzed as he watched on from the table right next to them, a heady mix of dread and amusement running through his computer soul. “Jezebel! How d a r e you solicit my happily taken hand!”

The waitress, who looked like she regretted serving their table, let alone attempting to get the number from the happily taken hand, raised her hands in surrender. “Sorry, sorry,” she said peaceably and with the calm air of someone who dealt with drunks as a job choice, “just trying to shoot my shot, ya know?”

Markus nodded at her magnanimously, because he was a kind and forgiving man even as a drunken buffoon. “Fret not. I pardon you of this most heinous slight, for if you knew the one to own my heart, you would understand that no other could compare.”

“Sure thing dude,” she said goodnaturedly, packing up and replacing drinks around their tables expertly, and parting with a “have a good night Romeo.”

“But who can no other compare to? WHOMST??” asked North, throwing her torso onto the table and looking up at Markus pleadingly.

“We’ve ruled out Jerry #451, Claudia, Baris from accounting, and Jerry #36,” Simon rattled off. He was looking down at a napkin that he had scribbled the names of all of their potential suspects. “I’ve got it. It’s Baris.”

North rolled her eyes. “We already said it wasn’t Baris.”

“Ohhh. Right, right.” Simon nodded his head and continued to not cross off the names of the people they had decided against, as he had been doing all night.

“How about you describe them a little?” Josh put in, reasonable, and therefore slightly less wasted than everyone else. “Hair color? Height? Eyes? Something?”

“Nay, I must not speak thusly!” Markus declared, back of his hand over his forehead and everything. “For if I were to tread down that forbidden road, I would surely not be able to stop myself from breaking our sacred oath of secrecy!”

“Oh my goOOOOOOOd I hate this fucking oaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaath,” North threw her head back and cried to heavens, which, considering her positon, was probably going to be hell on her neck come morning. “Come on! Break your oath! Be like Thor and wield oathbreaker goddamnit!”

“You might be thinking of Stormbreaker,” Connor added, the need to try and reason with alcoholics apparently embedded in his programming.

North narrowed her eyes at him, or rather his torso, since her chin was very resolutely still resting on the table. “If you think I’m thinking right now then you are drunker than I am.”

Connor lifted his barely touched glass to her in a toast because how dare she be lucid enough to clap back so quickly. A well deserved rebuttal fucking cheers.

“Glasses!” Josh exclaimed, snapping his fingers. “Do they wear glasses? That should narrow down some people.”

“That’s right! That’ll tell us if they’re an android or not. Androids don’t wear glasses! Our eyes are like...fucking...better and shit!”

“Unless….” Simon narrowed his eyes, pausing dramatically. “....they do.”

North gasped. Josh put his hands on either side of face, muttering; “holy fucking shit he’s right.”

Markus scoffed. “Their eyes do not hide behind paltry spectacles! His beautiful orbs, so soft and caring when his gaze lands upon my person, seeing into my very soul, are the warmest chocolate brown!”

‘Ah shit here we go,’ Connor thought, wishing not for the first time that he could just down his drink and join everyone else in blissful, idiotic cavorting. The soft, melodic piano and crooning words of All My Life playing over the speaker stayed his hand. Best not take any chances

“HE!” Simon burst out, tipping over in his chair. “He say he! Them is He!”

“Are we talkin’ Hershey’s or Dove?”

“Ghirardelli you fucking plebs!”

“Oi!” North banged her hand on the table so hard it left a handprint indented in the wood. It was one amongst many however, and not all of them left by their party. Such was the price for serving android drinks at a human bar - you either shelled out for sturdier furniture or the dents and chips became a charming aspect of your décor. “Don’t get spicy with us Sir Lancelot!”

“Apologies fair maiden,” Markus responded easily. He took her hand delicately and made a sweeping bow over it. “Alas, my passions got away from me.” He dropped her hand and whirled around, coat billowing with the movement and most assuredly by accident, placing both hands to his thirium pump. “Conjuring up the magnificent images that is the love of my life oft times sends my emotions into a tizzy! His hair; cloud like in my grasp as I run my fingers threw earthen chestnut tendrils - ”

‘Hhhhhhhhhhhhn so many adjectives Markus whyyyyyyyyyy,’ Connor wheezed internally. He didn’t bother trying to keep down his blush. Markus was nowhere near done laying on the compliments and he’d be subjecting himself to an endless loop of canceling the process. Besides, he could just blame it on the alcohol. Blame it on the a a a a a alcohol - wait no. What!? WHAT. Connor looked down at his drink and saw, to his mounting horror, that the glass was emptier than it had been a few minutes ago. Goddamn his automated rest mode cycle for transforming into fidgeting whenever he was nervous! He resolutely pushed the glass out of his immediate reach.

Nines, who was quietly sitting next to him, hunched over and taking notes on his own napkin, snapped his head up to attention when the glass brushed against his arm. His younger brother was looking from Connor to Markus, eyes narrowed suspiciously as Markus carried on. Connor didn’t like that look at all. It was always a risk inviting Nines to their little outings, the only thing Connor could bank on was Nines passing out - as his dear little bro was a notorious light weight - before his deductive skills could pierce through his drunken haze. Apparently Nines had chosen tonight of all nights, where Markus had never been more obvious about their relationship, to bloody pace himself.

If he could, Connor would be sweating bullets.

“ - a wit SO SHARP!!” Markus declared, foot now planted on his chair and shaking his fist to the ceiling as if it had insulted one of Carl’s paintings, “that neither an UNDEAD HOARD nor a POLITICIAN’S EGO could survive it’s precision strike!!”

“Brown hair, brown eyes, banger body, smarty pants, good at analyzing shit, likes animals” North listed off, holding a hand up and ticking a finger down. “Well that rules out all the Jerrys; they’re all redheads and they’re pretty aggressive about it - except for Jerry #86. Is your man-squeeze Jerry #86?”

“No no no last I heard Jerry #86 is dating Hatsume Miku’s bodyguard; Android Lucy Lawless.” said Simon.

“Tch. Lucky,” pouted North.

“Oh wow, she really kept that name huh?” Josh said, voice faint with wonder and disbelief. “That’s such a mouthful.”

“And who are you to question a Queen!?” snapped North.

“Huzzah and many blessings to the fortuitous couple!” Markus cheered, toasting a stein of frothy blue intoxication that looked as cartoonish as it did poisonous to the sky, knocking it back in several impressive gulps and slamming it back on the table. “BUT NEITHER OF THEM CAN COMPARE TO THE BEAUTY AND GRACE THAT IS MY LOVE!!” he boomed, louder and more British by the second. “WHO’S CURIOSITY AND INTELLECT A CHERISHED BOON TO I, BUT A WEAPON OF MASS DESTRUCTION TO HIS ENEMIES - !”

North slapped her hand on the table several times, the proverbial light bulb lighting up in her eyes - oh. No not proverbial. There was currently little lightbulb emojis pictured in her pupils. Yet another drunken download added to the bill. Connor was glad he’d drawn the long straw on ‘irresponsible buying duty’ tonight. No doubt there would be a lot of strange receipts to sort through in the morning. “Oh! I know I know! It’s Josh!”

So startled by this declaration/accusation, Josh jumped in his seat. “What!?”

“Brown hair, brown eyes, hot, obnoxious, smart - everything FITS!”

“...he didn’t say obnoxious,” Josh muttered, then physically shook sanity back into himself. “It can’t be me. I think I’d know if I was dating Markus!”

Simon leaned in closer towards Josh, arm on the table, determination in his mien. “But what if…” Without breaking eye contact with his friend, he smoothly cracked open his Thirium berry blast bahama mama banana punch wine cooler, and proceeded to pour it just two centimeters off from his glass, all over the table. “You don’t know.”

Josh was shook in the face of this evidence. North narrowed her eyes so hard that they were just closed at this point. “Highly suspicious.”

“No. Nooooo. No? No! Of course I’m not. Right Markus?”

Markus steepled his fingers together and cackled in a way that most people would find concerning, but Connor just found it adorable. He would saving that in his memory banks. “I’ll never tell~,” he sing songed.

“H i g h l y s u s p i c i o u s.”

“I know who it is,” Nines suddenly said, calm but with such confidence that he was easily heard amidst the ruckus. He had his elbows planted on the table, chin resting upon his entwined fingers. Steele grey eyes swept over the now quiet group, everyone waiting with baited breath.

“Grant us your wisdom ‘o soothsayer,” Markus whispered, eyes wide with anticipation and literally perched on the edge of his seat. Connor seriously measured the pros and cons of just throwing his portion of the tab on the table and yeeting himself out of the window.

“It’s Sixty.”

Immediately the room erupted into scoffs and hisses of disbelief. North gave him a thumbs down and cupped her hand to her mouth, letting a long, “Booooo!”

“Why are you booing me I’m right!”

“BoooOOooOOOOOoooooo!” Markus, Josh and Simon joined in.

Connor blinked, and suddenly felt all of his concerns about Nines’ being the lynch pin in solving this mystery evaporate. If Markus transformed into a C grade Shakespeare impersonator when drunk, and Connor subconsciously wanted to be recruited by America’s Got Talent, then Nines became a consummate dumbass.

“That’s it!” North exploded. “Ten dollars says it’s Jerry #92! I caught him in a wig once!” She stood up, her chair sliding back from the force, and slammed a note on the table.

Simon also stood up with equal intensity. “Twenty says it’s Josh!” He reached into his pocket and slammed its contents onto the table. When he removed his hand six lego pieces, a My Little Pony leg, and two actual diamonds were revealed. Connor hoped dearly that the bartender cut Simon off soon.

“It’s not me!” Josh said exasperated. He paused, then pointedly pulled out some money and threw it in the pot as well. “I put forty on Brenden.”

“Bull! Shit!” North declared. “Fitness guru Brenden!? No way!”

“He fits the criteria.”

“I doubt ‘How To Tell If An Android Has Welded on Parts from China vs Russia in their Selfies’ videos on his YouTube channel is the kind analysis Markus was talking about.”

“You don’t know that! He didn’t specify...”

As the two continued to argue, with Simon chiming in with some non sequitur, and Nines tutting about these ‘ignorant fools and their blindness to the evidence presented’, Connor looked over to Markus. He was quiet. He had his elbow perched precariously on the edge of the table, his cheek resting on his fist, a small hat (that was not there literally two minutes ago) was on his head, folded from one of the bar napkins.

And he was looking at Connor as if he hung the moon and stars.

‘How could the world not already know,’ Connor thought, soft and warm inside, happy merely to be in his line of sight, ‘When he looks at me like that?’

Connor picked up his glass and lifted it. “One hundred dollars on Sixty.”

Chaos erupted. Nines threw his arms up and hooted like he’d won the super bowl. Josh tried to explain to him how that was mathematically impossible. North shook her head and warned him that he would live on the streets with an answer like that. Simon pulled out a Yu-Gi-Oh! Card and said he would give him this Charizard if he agreed with him that Josh was Markus’ secret boyfriend. Connor withheld himself from trying to convince drunk people that this was not how betting worked.

Maybe Connor shouldn’t worry so much about their relationship being discovered after all. At this rate, no one would know about he and Markus being together until the wedding invites.

[marjansmarwani]

utterly worthy of love

1.3k || ao3

TK needs to share his news with the team, but he's worried they'll hate him. Carlos assures him that he's wrong, but that'll he be with him every step of the way no matter what. ----- a 2x07 missing moment

Me, actually publishing a coda in less than 24 hours? I’m more surprised than you are. Beta’d by @officereyes 

---------------

“But what if they hate me.” 

“TK, they are not going to hate you.” 

“How do you know? I’m abandoning them, they might hate me.”

“TK,” Carlos said bracingly, putting down the knife he was using and turning to face his boyfriend, “you’re not abandoning them, and they’re not going to hate you.”

“How can you be so sure?” 

“I’m sure,” he began, stepping closer to TK so he could wind his arms around his waist, “because they are your team and they love you. They only want what’s best for you and if it’s being a paramedic, they’ll support you.” 

TK was quiet for several moments, absentmindedly running a hand down Carlos arm as he thought. “You really think so?” he asked eventually and Carlos’s heart ached at the thought that TK was so full of doubt. People loved him and sometimes it was hard for him to see that. 

“I really do,” he told him firmly. 

TK’s posture relaxed ever so slightly and he smiled at Carlos, “what would I do without you?” 

Carlos leaned forward, pressing a kiss into the crook of TK’s neck, “you won’t have to find out,” he assured him, “because I am with you, every step of the way.”  

-------

About an hour later the sounds of a houseful drifted through to Carlos’s kitchen. He couldn’t deny that he loved this, that finding this little family within the 126 crew who now filled his home on a regular basis brought back fond memories of a childhood home always teeming with family and neighbors and love. He had always wanted that for himself and his own future home, but he hadn’t had it until he met TK. In so many ways TK was the key piece to his puzzle; once he had fit into place, all the rest had fallen in easily.

They were gathered in the living room, chatting animatedly as TK and Carlos brought out food and drinks. It was familiar and comfortable, but TK was visibly anxious and Carlos knew that the others had noticed. It was Marjan that finally brought it up, once TK and Carlos had settled onto the couch together. 

“Okay dude, spill,” Marjan demanded, “there’s clearly something on your mind.” 

TK looked like a deer in the headlights, throwing an anxious glance at Carlos, who gave him an encouraging nod and a smile. The others were looking at them expectantly now as TK tried to find the words, starting and stopping several times. 

“If y’all got engaged it’s not as big of a surprise as you may think it is,” Judd informed them mildly and Carlos choked on his beer. 

“What?” he spluttered at the same moment TK exclaimed, “no, we're not engaged!” 

They looked at each other and TK rushed on, “I don’t mean to say that would be a bad thing…” 

“But not yet,” Carlos finished for him, flashing him a reassuring smile and feeling relief wash over him when he got one in return. 

“Not yet,” TK agreed. 

The others were watching the exchange with amused expressions but Marjan was not about to let it go. 

“Alright, no engagement,” she conceded.

“Yet,” Paul muttered as he took another drink of his beer but she continued, unfazed. 

“But there is definitely something.” 

TK looked back at Carlos, eyes clouded with anxiety. Carlos gave him a reassuring smile, reaching around to squeeze his arm before TK turned his gaze back to his crew. 

“You know how Captain Vega still has an opening on her team, right?” 

“You mean the paramedic of the day? Yeah, we’ve noticed,” Marjan quipped. “What about it?” 

“I applied,” TK announced quickly, “and she selected me from the other candidates. I’m going to be the new paramedic for the 126.” 

The chatter of earlier had been replaced by stunned silence and Carlos can practically hear the gears in TK’s head turning, taking the silence and turning it into disapproval or disappointment in his mind. He reached around and grabbed the hand that was anxiously fingering the material of his jeans, squeezing it tightly. 

“I just wish you had come to this decision before I spent all those hours watching you drive over orange cones, kid. Although I did manage to gather up some good blackmail material, which I intend to savor,” Judd declared with a grin and Carlos could feel TK relax ever so slightly beside him. 

“That’s actually dope dude!” Mateo exclaimed. “You’re going to be driving the ambulance now!”

“Paramedic Strand does have a nice ring to it,” Marjan agreed with a smile. 

Carlos looked to Paul, who was the only one to have not said anything yet to see that Paul was studying TK in turn. 

“You didn’t think we were going to be upset about this, did you?” he asked him, causing the others to frown and look at TK as well. 

“Maybe?” TK admitted sheepishly. “I love working with you guys and I love our team, I didn’t want you guys to feel like I was abandoning you, I guess.” 

“Do you want this?” 

“Yeah,” TK admitted softly, “I do.” 

“Then who are we to say anything?” Paul said with a shrug. “As long as you’re happy, I’m happy, man. And proud of you, for taking the risk. It’s not an easy thing to make that change.” 

“And being a paramedic is not an easy job,” Judd added, “but you’re going to kill it, brother.” 

“How can you be so sure?” 

The doubt in TK’s voice struck Carlos like a physical blow, but Judd carried on undaunted. 

“Because I know Tommy and she would never hire anyone she didn’t think could hack it,” he said firmly. “And,” he added, voice softening, “I know you kid, and I know that you will give it everything you have.” 

“Plus, we all saw you in that minefield,” Paul reminded him, “someone who wasn’t going to be good at this job wouldn’t have been able to do what you did. You’re going to be great at this.” 

TK grinned at them all, smile bright and infectious. Carlos leaned forward, wrapping his arms around him from behind and placing a soft kiss to the inside of his neck. 

“Told you,” he whispered into his ear as he pulled back, chuckling at the eye roll he got in return. 

“If you two are done,” Paul said pointedly, “this deserves a toast.” 

He raised his beer bottle in the air and the others followed suit with their various beverages, “to Paramedic Stand, who may be wearing a different uniform but will always be a part of this family.” 

The others sounded their agreement and TK beamed. As the toast ended and their focus shifted to other conversations. Carlos surveyed them all with a fond smile. He really did love this little family they had built, but none more than the man currently leaning against him. He was still beaming, his whole countenance lighter now that the anxiety of disappointing his team had been resolved. Carlos reached forwards to wrap an arm around him, pulling him closer to his own body, his chest flush against TK’s back. He leaned forward, placing his chin on TK’s shoulder as he watched the others interact. 

“I can’t believe you thought they were going to hate you,” he said softly, “like they could ever. You’re just too damn lovable.” 

“Oh?” TK asked, turning his head so he could see Carlos and give him a cheeky grin. 

“Yeah,” Carlos confirmed, “and nothing is ever going to change that.” 

The smile TK gave him this time was softer, more intimate. He leaned down to press a kiss on Carlos’s forehead before finding the hand that was wrapped around his body and intertwining it with his own. They settled in together, so intertwined in each other it was hard to say where one began and the other ended, to watch the others. Never before had Carlos felt such contentment with anyone, and he was grateful for it every day. He loved this man with all his heart and though he knew now wasn’t the time for a formal lifelong commitment, he had a feeling it would only be a matter of time. 

[omgitsaddyc]

I was in my oc feelings this morning, and this happened! 

1.2k words of unadulterated Kvyat Fogwyn Feelings :D I wrote like he was writing in a journal over the course of leaving to find Rikka, re-meeting Jason, finding Rikka, and returning to Larkridge to clear her name. 

For Shards of Light peeps: My version of this story is a bit different from the campaign’s storyline, for reference.

cw for depressive/suicidal thoughts, injury mention, and Kvyat’s swear-filled internal monologue :P

9/26

The name’s Kvyat Fogwyn. I’m not great at talking about my feelings and shit, so uh...bear with me I guess. 

This stupid journal is honestly a last resort. There’s no one left here for me. That’s probably unfair to my parents, but it’s not like they ever really cared. Once they figured out I had a few screws loose they just kinda tolerated me.

I’m getting the hell outta here as soon as I can. I don’t have any plans, but I figure if I just start walking, maybe I’ll eventually find Ri. If she even wants to talk to me. The least I can do is explain what happened, and if I’m lucky she might understand. If not, maybe I’ll just let her slit my throat. It’s what I deserve at this point.

Even after three years of following Britta around I still couldn’t figure out what the hell was going on with her. Guess this is why I stick to bringing people in instead of all the investigation shit.

It’s almost the anniversary of when Ri had to leave. I’ll never forget that fuckin’ day. I’ll never forget how intense her gaze felt. I’m glad I never looked up to see it, but I can still feel the hairs stand up on the back of my neck when I think about it. We...we were supposed to have each other’s backs no matter what, and I ruined it. The one thing I promised her and I fuckin’-

Sorry. This is still too hard to talk about. Dunno why I’m apologizing to a book. Every time I start to think about that day, these intense feelings bubble up from my stomach and it makes me wanna jump out of the tallest tree I can find. I hate it. I hate everything I’ve done, everything I wasn’t strong enough to do...I’m worthless. 

Going out to find Ri...this is the last thing I’ll do. If I can’t find her, well...sorry to whoever finds this. Take my shit and go buy yourself somethin’ nice. Just leave me for the wolves.

*

9/30

Something really fuckin’ stupid happened yesterday. 

I went to the market to get a few things for my trip, and sell off anything I wouldn’t be needing anymore. All but cleaned out my old room. Less for my parents to deal with later.

So I accidentally kicked a stupid rabbit that was crossing the road. It was crowded and I didn’t see it until it was too late, but I felt bad. So I took the thing back to our shed and let it stay there to rest up. 

This morning I go out there, and there’s no rabbit. Just that fuckin’ Grunwick dude. I haven’t seen him in years, and there he was sitting in the hay with a gash across his eye. Heard he fucked off to the woods, and he was better off out there. Dunno when or why he came back, but it took a moment to figure out he was the rabbit. Fucker’s a weird shapeshifter or somethin’. I don’t get it, but it doesn’t matter because I kicked him out.

I plan on leavin’ in about a week. Haven’t told my folks, but they’re used me leavin’ all the time for work. It’ll be fine.

*

10/10 

I left three days ago, and we just made it to the city. 

Yeah. I wrote we. The fuckin’ Grunwick followed me. Caught me right before I left and said I’d never make it out there by myself. I’ve been through the woods alone before and yeah, it’s not always the best when you gotta sleep and there’s no one to keep watch, but...whatever. Guess it wouldn’t mean much if I bit it before I even get the chance to find Ri.

So I let him come with. At least he knows his way around the forest, and he doesn’t talk much. Oh, yeah. And he’s got healing magic. That unfortunately already came in handy. Wasn’t my fault I got attacked by a damn angry boar. This never leaves this book but...I’m kinda glad Jason’s here. I probably would’ve bled out in the woods without him. 

We gotta go find somewhere to stay for the night. I’m tired of sleepin’ on the ground, and my hair’s startin’ to get gross. We’ll stay here for a day or so to regroup and restock, and maybe I can find some intel on where Ri might be. This is probably just a weird gut feeling, but it feels like she’s not too far away.

*

10/28

We found Ri. And she’s coming back with us. My tracking skills aren’t total garbage, I guess. 

We ended up going through two more towns, but I picked up her trail and it wasn’t too hard to find her after that. Now all we gotta do is get back to Larkridge, and prove her innocence. Between the three of us, I think we got this.

Spending all this time with Jason on the road’s been...fine. He’s not a bad traveling companion even though he likes to sleep in, and eats more sugar than any one person ever should. There are worse things, I guess. Ri called him my boyfriend which. No. No! Not in a million years. I mean, I don’t hate the guy but. I don’t know. 

Shut up you stupid book.

*

11/7

Ri left again today, but this time on her own terms. She’s still got an evil queen to take down with her new friends.

Reading back to my first entry in this stupid thing kinda hurts now. I know it’s only been a little over a month, but a lot’s changed. For the first time in a while I...don’t want to disappear. 

I know it’s only been a little more than a week since I wrote last, and uh. Well. Things happened. It’s been a long week, okay?! 

So, we found Britta. She was possessed. She had been since before Rikka left. We found out she fucked around with some planar shit, opened herself up to a demon, and the rest is history. Between Ri’s new friends and Jason, we managed to save her. She’s resting up at home with Ri’s parents. She doesn’t know what happened over the last three years. She doesn’t know she killed Jason’s mom. We’ve gotta figure out how to tell her, but that’ll be a problem for future Ri, probably.

I’m resting up too, because Brit managed to get me good with her knife before we took her down. Just a hole in the chest, nothing too major. Jason didn’t take it well. Turns out...goddess this is sappy as shit but-

Turns out Jason never forgot about when we met at that festival all those years ago. I never forgot either, it just…

I didn’t think it would ever work. I was wrong. I’m so glad I was wrong.

Maybe Ri’s boyfriend accusation is more realistic now. 

Shut up, you stupid book. Gonna throw this in the damn fire so no one can ever find it and make fun of me. 

I gotta get some rest. Fogwyn, signing off.

[angelmichelangelo]

I’m gonna speak over anon because I’m literally terrified of phannies coming after me even though I’ve rebranded, I still get hate anons from them even now which is crazy. Anyway. It’s honestly a relief to read a respectful take on why someone’s left the phandom. Your words put my exact feelings into articulation and I think my main emotion is just... disappointment? I feel like dnp hold their audience at an arm’s length now and for good reason. It’s impersonal, and after what we put them through I think they deserve that. The fact that people are still trying to keep some kind of momentum going, hyping up cookie-cutter content or you know, making aus about a literal REAL BABY just doesn’t sit right with me. It feels good and healthy to move on. They aren’t interesting now. Seeing people running full time phan blogs makes me actually uncomfortable. Because I don’t feel like it’s really about dnp so much as clout seeking half the time these days.

anon you are always MORE than welcome to come talk to me about all of this stuff lol (i have a lot of feelings ok?)

and you’re totally right. one of the weirdest shifts for me that kinda gave me the final push to leave was the fact that dnp stopped caring about their audience. and the thing is, dnp always seemed different to other youtubers because they had this connection with us. twice daily livestreams, one a week upload from the gaming channel, twice monthly updates between them… take 2018 for example, if you asked any phannie they’d probably agree that it was the best year for us all because it felt like dnp were on this emotional wavelength with us where it was like: ‘okay this is the content we like and this is the content we’re getting’ and it was so perfectly balanced. it never felt like they were just pumping out content for the sake of it. they could take a boring ass game like ‘google autocomplete’ and make a real good video out of it. that was the content and the dan and phil i enjoyed.

and now??? dude. the mere idea that phil went ahead and deleted all his lessamazingphil videos to reach a larger audience is just…….. if i cared more i’d be mad. they so clearly want a different audience now. im sorry to the phannie moots that follow me still but that’s just what i see. phil’s content went from lighthearted jokey funtimes to ‘oh my god you’re a 30 something year old man making content on the same level as fuckin troomtroom and you’re still making butthole face thumbnails to appease the algorithm.’ and that’s just heartbreaking bro. what the fuck happened. i was around for the cereal tasting video (i never watched it i don’t think i’ve watched a single video since last year) and like………… the hype it got? for a low quality looking buzzfeed quiz type video is just… yeah. dude, this goes beyond the argument of ‘BUT JENNA MARBLES MADE THESE VIDEOS!!!! SHE DID IT AND EVERYONE LOVED IT!!!’ and the difference between phil and jenna was: jenna put a whole lot of fuckin effort into those videos to make them unique. not just: trying on makeup! but instead: ‘trying on makeup and then squirting eye drops into my eyeballs to make myself cry to then see which one is best for dramatic crying purposes!!’ there was a whole spin on the take that i’ve never seen phil EVER do. sorry to this man but he really…… isn’t as creative as he used to be. he falls flat every time in his videos and it makes me laugh when i see the same 😯 face in his thunmbnails with the most boring looking video idea painted in bright colours. this is the same man that was making those wacky ass videos in 2009? could have fooled me. are we sure he isn’t working for buzzfeed or something because that’s the vibe i get from him lmao.

and dan. ohhhh dan. OH DAN! he’s fed up of his audience too. at least he’s got the balls to at least half admit it (or maybe he’s just stupid idk lol) but yeah. he’s not coming back to youtube, or at least, in a way that’ll bring him back the views. he doesn’t care, and he hasn’t cared for a long time. i’m not sure what the hell he’s doing and like i said: to those running phandom blogs, you’re tough dude. you’re tough as hell because how anyone can scrape together content for this man is beyond me lmfao. he either wants: real intelligent smart people audience from his book (i have so much to say about that i could write a fuckin book) OR he wants: gay 30 year old men audience from his…. *sigh* his weird horny tweets he makes once a month. im sorry but WHAT?! THIS is a man that people want to stan????? AND ANOTHER THING: that hideously awkward livestream thing he did for AIDS… did nobody else think it was just SO HORRIFICALLY out of touch for him to making SO MANY “im such a horny slut i slept with so many people i got so many diseases”…. for a charity stream…….. for AIDS????? im sorry but how gross. that…. that fucked me off so bad im sorry but what the actual fuck is wrong with this man?? his content it all over the place and frankly i thought it was all awful. if this man ever does do a stand up comedy show like he’s been alluding to then holy shit THATS maybe the funniest thing he’s ever said in his life because that man ain’t funny (and he never had been im sorry i always was too scared to say that in the pits of phandom hell but yall need to hear it: he’s not got a single funny bone in his body and really honesty? neither does phil. they’re only ‘laugh worthy’ because they’re acting like the mf chuckle brothers).

that’s the impression i get. dan and phil have never been more disconnected from their audience. their merch is horrific like seriously what the fuck phil why are you charging your fans £70 for something i could get in primark for £15?! because again: their merch was always a plus for me (not that i ever bought it personally) but it was nice to know a youtuber wasn’t just slapping their name on a shirt and going DONE! it always had a theme or a connection to them, their brand, an inside joke or whatever. now phil is making…. couch club merch??? what the fuck is that? also side note: when i went onto their website to take a look at it i actually cried laughed at the fact that he’s selling the socks separately. phannies, you’re in deep i tell ya. oy vey.

so yeah im probably gonna piss everyone off with this huge rant but frankly idc anymore lol phandom is probably gonna die out anyways because how can you keep a wholeass fandom afloat on the algorithm appeasing content squeezed into 10 minutes and a man that is too embarrassed of his audience to ever give a shit about them. like, if u like their shit and u wanna keep ur blog about them: go for it everyone should enjoy what they wanna enjoy but also this is my opinion and if anyone wants to come crying to me about it like ‘b-b-but emmy YOU were a phannie once! ur just a jealous ex-phannie doing what all ex-phannies do which is be mean a bitter!!!!!’ like…… ya. why do you think everyone that leaves phandom starts being honest about them? because in phandom dnp can do no wrong 😌 and in phandom you must be nice to smol bean phwiw lester and danny howell 😌 otherwise all the big phannie account will come and eat you 😌 lmfao but yeah that’s all i have to say i guess. boy, this felt theraputic as fuck. and also im sorry you’re getting hate anons, i get a few filter through as well like… idk, phandom is just insane to me and now im like the final girl in a horror movie, standing in a pool of blood like: oh shit. i’m alive! lmfao

thanks for the ask anon, take care <3

[razberryyum]

Scumbag System (SVSSS donghua) Episode 10 Thoughts (spoilers)

(covers SVSSS chaps 24 - 26, BC Novels Translations)

And thus the first season of the SVSSS donghua comes to an end...rather weirdly abruptly to be honest, but more on that later. Obviously I love the donghua. It was not perfect, but it still exceeded my expectations. I truly appreciate what they were able to do within their budget constraints and I think they captured the spirit of the source material perfectly, which is really all I hope for when it comes to adaptations.  The writing was strong, the humor hit the spot always (for example, when poor Shizun got motion sickness from sword riding, I guffawed), and they also gave us some of the most beautiful characters I’ve ever seen on screen, especially with Shen Qingqiu, Luo Binghe and Liu Qingge. I really, really hope they release official figurines for them. I’m going to start saving my money now just for that possibility.

Even though their time together in this episode was short, the BingQiu love was definitely strong. They gave them a combo move that was not in the source material: for someone like me who grew up watching Cantonese dramas, two characters who have a combo sword move (”雙劍合璧”!) are usually a couple so I was especially tickled by this addition. I am always thankful to the donghua team for the little Easter Eggs they give us for BingQiu, like the way Binghe's eyes lit up when he sees SQQ... 

or when SQQ touches him...

Once again, for those not in the know, it can easily be interpreted as a disciple just being devoted and filial to his Shizun. But for those of us who have read the novel, of course we know it’s indication of Bingmei falling in love with SQQ. I love how subtle yet significant these little expressions of Binghe’s are, and I hope they continue on with these little touches even in the next season. 

Of course then there are the more obvious gestures, like that HUG:

It lasted for a good 15 seconds and oh my God look at the Binghe’s hand placement!  There was totally nipple groppage happening there! This wasn’t in the book by the way...SQQ didn’t get woozy and Binghe most definitely didn’t have to catch him like some fainting damsel, so we have the donghua team to thank for this wonderful moment of (sexy) physical contact between the two of them. 

The donghua team was also especially generous in this episode since not only did we get some BingQiu love, but we got a pinch of LiuShen and QiJiu love too.

LQG’s eyes were on SQQ the entire time! And then Yue Qingyuan as usual took any opportunity he got to touch his Qingqiu.  So all shippers were fed. Hell, they even threw in some more straight-baiting again so peeps who are watching the show for the “straight” romance between Luo Binghe and his never-to-be-future-wife Qin Wanyue were fed too since the scene where Binghe gives her the handkerchief to wipe away her tears were not in the chapters of the book for this episode, and racking my brain I don’t even think it was in the book, period. I’m trying to remember if that handkerchief even holds any significance but even if it does, it’s all for naught since we know Qin Wanyue is at most just a minor side character. She does pop up again later on but then is mostly forgotten, so...not quite sure what that moment was all about other than to, I don’t know, throw off the censors?

I’m also not sure why we spent so much time with Liu Mingyan and Gongyi Xiao in this episode. Nothing against them personally, I like both characters very much (despite my previous complaints about GYX’s character design), and it’s not that they don’t deserve more screen time, but this was the season finale! Even though the next season has been announced, God knows when we’ll see it next year and how many episodes it would be, so every minute of screen time matters! That’s why I was a bit puzzled that they used up half of the episode showing LMY basically facing the same perils with her group of fellow disciples as before and GYX just running from that huge serpent. Even if that thing DOES turn out to be Zhuzhi-lang, it was still a bit much. They weren’t exactly character building scenes either so...why? Budget reasons? Didn’t have enough money to pay SQQ’s voice actor (Wu Lei-laoshi) so they had to stick in miscellaneous scenes to lessen his screen time? 

I’m kidding of course. God I hope that wasn’t the reason because that would just be sad.

Speaking of miscellaneous scenes though, what was going on with these two dudes?

I gotta admit, I’m a bit salty that these two mob characters got to do what our main couple can’t. What’s their story? Why do they get special privileges? Damn these nobodies. XD

All kidding aside, I have to say, of all the episodes this season, this might be the weakest one, not only because of the “filler” scenes, but also, the way the episode ended was so odd, especially for a season finale. The season basically ended on a scene transition. Not a cliffhanger, just a scene transition, and then cut to credits. What?? Why??? It’s almost as if they just ran out of time so had to stop the show all of a sudden. And then as if to make up for it, they added post-credit scenes which, honestly blew me away because it was so unexpected. It was indeed almost enough to make me completely forgive the weakness of the episode as a whole and that weird-ass ending.

I teared up!  The scene was kind of chopped up, didn’t even flow that smoothly, but I still got emotional! I’m sure when I see this scene in its entirety next season I am just going to be destroyed. I think they made it even more gut-wrenching than it was in the novel. Looks like the donghua team really aren’t gonna hold back when it comes to delivering the BingQiu knives. 

We also got to see Mobei-jun appear in the post-credits scene; I guess they had to stick him in there since he was featured in the poster for this season, so it would have been weird if he didn’t at least make an appearance.

I immediately thought of him as Sephiroth’s younger cousin when I first saw him on the poster and I still feel that way. Anyone related to Sephiroth, I will approve and instantly have affection for. For the MoShang shippers’ sake, I hope the Shang Qinghua they create for him will be just as pretty. I think I can now safely discard my guess from last time and also that moon-faced bearded ojisan others have guessed. We actually got a glimpse of the real deal in this sequence:

They strategically made him blurry so you can’t really make out his features, but what we still can tell from there is that he does not have facial hair (hence, he cannot be the ojisan) and the hair crown he’s wearing is silver and different from the twinky sect leader. So I guess we’ll be getting a fresh out of the microwave Airplane Bro instead of any of the no-name potential cannon fodder we’ve already seen. 

We’ll probably get the abyss opening up in maybe even the first episode of next season but that’ll still leave a lot of ground to be covered in just 10 episodes (rumored). There haven’t been any talk about a third season, but I really hope it’ll happen, even though it might take them a while to make it. I know it’s premature to even think of a third season when we haven’t even gotten an actual release date for the second, but I’m greedy because I already miss the donghua. This season was over so quickly, I’m already mourning the lack of new episodes. I hope we get the second season in the first quarter of next year and then by some miracle, a third or even fourth to properly finish out the story. I know we will never get the FULL story, but as long as they keep the spirit of BingQiu’s love and continue to hint at it like they’ve been doing this season, I will be more than satisfied. 

And while I’m wishful thinking for new seasons, I hope we also get a BingQiu duet and character songs. I love the opening and ending theme this season, if they want to save money I totally don’t mind if they just use the same OP/ED themes in the next season as well, but I hope they throw in a good BingQiu insert song and then release some individual character songs as well. I’m still not a fan of Binghe’s voice, but maybe they can have someone else do his vocals for the songs. SVSSS is the older son of MXTX’s works, I feel like it already got short-shrifted in terms of adaptation since it got the lesser budget compared to MDZS and TGCF. Hopefully with how popular the donghua is this season, it will be given a bigger budget next season so they can bring to life all the subsequent proceedings from the book properly. And whatever they’re paying Wu Lei-laoshi, SQQ’s voice actor, they should double it because that man is just amazing. I worship his voice and performance. I wish he would read the audiobook version of the the novel. I would listen to the hell out of that.  I have always loved SQQ, but if I’m going to be honest, I came into the show just a little more excited about seeing Bingge being brought to life. I still love Binghe of course, in all his phases, however, now,  because of Wu Lei-laoshi’s stellar voice performance (and of course SQQ’s beautiful looks), I’m leaving this season absolutely head over heels about SQQ/Shen Yuan. Also thanks to the show, I’m completely obsessed with Liu Qingge as well.  So for those two reasons, I will eternally be grateful to the donghua team.  

[just-a-creep-babe]

Hoodie Yandere Alphabet ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Commissioned by anonymous, thank you so much! 💗💝💗

~Requests are closed~

Masterlist: x

Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

Despite everything, ya boi isn’t really that affectionate. He doesn’t like being vulnerable cause he doesn’t wanna risk the control he has, so any affection usually comes in the form of sickly sweet teasing & mocking. Like he’ll drag a knife/gun up & down their body while cooing about how pretty they look when they’re all scared & helpless beneath him, and that’s about as affectionate as he gets

But he is, admittedly, a huge softie in the mornings when he’s half-asleep & also when he’s a little woozy from blood loss. In that case, he won’t be so afraid to smother his darling in plenty of kissies & cuddles :3 And once he’s got a grip on them, it’s damn near impossible to escape; boy’s got some thicc 👏ass 👏muscles 👏 just perfect for trapping his squirming darling against his broad chest, even when he is just waking up or injured 👀

Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

Mmh he won’t actively make an effort to cover them in blood or anything, but he does appreciate how those streaks of scarlet look on their skin. He sometimes likes cutting them when they’ve misbehaved, and he especially loves whipping them until the blood starts beading up, but other than that, he’s prolly more of a fan of bruising. Too much blood can make too much of a mess, which just isn’t worth the effort in his opinion. He’s a clean boi uwu

Still, despite that, he’s not afraid of getting his hands real dirty every now & then when the occasion calls for it ;)

And on the other hand, if he gets injured while he’s out, he‘ll picking at his wounds & stitches until blood gushes out just to smear it on his darling. It brings out this kinda possessive side of him when they’re covered in his blood—his mark. He also enjoys how kinda fucked up it is—and bonus points if it freaks his darling out too :)))

Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

He’s pretty damn cruel tbh. He enjoys hurting them physically, but he also absolutely adores messing with their head. He’ll act sweet & caring one second, then flip the switch & start mocking them for thinking he might actually be a good person. He likes being unpredictable with his cruelty too—it keeps them on edge. If they expect him to ridicule them, he won’t, and if they let their guard down & start believing he might genuinely care this time, he’ll be extra cruel~

Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

Oh, he definitely would. He’s smart enough to realize that what he’s done isn’t right, and he‘s probably beyond redemption at this point, so why not? Homeboy knows he’s going to hell anyways, he might as well enjoy the ride & do what he pleases ;p

He does many-a things against their will, and like I mentioned, he loves mind games & generally messing with their head, to the point of possibly breaking them. He’s also certainly not against dishing out punishments too. Whether or not they deserve it is sometimes questionable, but he’ll find a way to gaslight them into thinking it’s prolly their fault regardless ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

He doesn’t like being vulnerable with someone he knows won’t reciprocate said vulnerability. Boy’s just not about taking those unnecessary risks. So he doesn’t really let himself show any kind of emotions towards them. And this mans is fucking excellent at hiding what he’s feeling, and tbh, as a yandere, it just makes him all the more downright terrifying

The only time he might start opening up is when, again, he’s tired/injured & his defences are down, or he thinks his darling might be falling for him & their relationship is getting,, kinda more serious/genuine. Even then, it’s a slow process, cause opening up to someone isn’t exactly a familiar concept to him

Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

Oh, he loves it when they fight back. They can’t make things too easy for him now, can they?~ He likes when they aren’t afraid to show a bit of spunk; it only makes things all the more entertaining~

And besides, he knows that when it boils down to it, they can’t overpower him, so it’s not like he’s got anything to be afraid of anyways. They just end up looking super cute all flustered & upset trying to fight him off—all bark & no bite~

Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

The whole thing is definitely a game. He wants to see if they can outsmart him—it gives him a huge rush & brings out this competitive side of him. He knows he’ll win in the end, ofc, but still, boy loves his little fucked up tricks & mind games, especially when his victim’s as cute & precious as his little darling~

When it comes to escaping, he’ll even go as far as to purposely letting them leave, just so he can leave traps around the forest & see if they can make it home—or if they end up crawling back to him. Make no mistake however; if they somehow, against all odds, manage to escape, he’s not gonna let that be the end of it. In fact, he’ll probably grow even more obsessed with them because they actually outsmarted him. The game would only really begin at that point 😈💀

Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

I don’t think there’d be one specific event that’d be the worst experience. If anything, the constant manipulation & gaslighting would wear them down over time and really fuck ‘em up in the long run. Just the whole experience of being his captive would leave some lasting trust issues, to say at the very least

But yeah, he isn’t one to get too physically violent unless it’s they’ve really misbehaved so they aren’t likely to experience any emotional outbursts/near-death experiences. He plays the long con & would rather fuck up their life by twisting & warping their perspective so bad no one could undo it. Not that they have much of a chance at returning to the real world w/o him, anyways. Cause, like I said, even if they escape, he’ll likely keep watching them from the shadows before reclaiming or killing them. They’re either stuck with him, traumatized for life among the normal population, or they’re dead, plain & simple

Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

Well, he’s got about a thousand back-up plans if they ever manage to escape that’ll lead them right back to his arms, but other than that, he doesn’t really,,,, know or care about the distant future?

Part of him realizes he might not always have his darling, while the other part of him’s convinced nothing could possibly tear them away from him. He’s kinda just betting they’ll eventually cave in, accept their fate & admit they love him back. At the same time though, he doesn’t want his little game to end, and he doesn’t want them to become complacent, so to speak. Despite all his careful planing ahead, he’s not really sure what he wants in the long run :/

Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

Surprisingly (or maybe not so surprisingly), he’s not one much for jealousy. In fact, he’d definitely let Masky, at the very least, play around with his darling because ya boy knows sharing is caring 😏😉

Yet despite his easy-going nature, there are time when even he, himself, isn’t immune to those sharp pangs of jealousy & possessiveness. It’s more of a mental thing than a physical one, though. Like he’s fine with letting his darling be around others, as long as everyone knows they ultimately belong to him, but if he catches hint that his darling’s thinking about someone else, then he‘ll be none too pleased.

He wants their thoughts to always be about him; and whether in a positive light or a negative one, he doesn’t care which. So he’d find some way to punish them or gaslight them until they can’t think of anyone else anymore. They should know they’re all his, no excuses

Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

Hm, Hoodie’s generally a reserved person, and that doesn’t change much around them tbh. He won’t be as quiet as he is around the other creeps, but he’s def not the type of yandere to gush about how much he loves his darling & how much they mean to him & stuff

Sometimes, he can even be,, kinda cold & stoic. He enjoys confusing them, so he might act like he doesn’t care about them & their presence is a burden—like he didn’t actively choose to kidnap them. He might range from acting like a cuddly murderous teddy bear to a detached blank slate of a person. Typically, when he puts some distance between him & his darling, it’s cause he wants them to fill the gap. He wants to see how far he’s twisted their mind to have them crave his acceptance, despite all the terrible things he’s done to them. So not only is he mentally unpredictable, but he’s also physically unpredictable too

Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

He probably just,,,,, wouldn’t go through any courting. He knows that if he wanted, he could easily slip his way into their life like everything’s normal, since he does look like a regular dude, but that’s not really what he’s about

If anything, he’s more the type to stalk them for a few weeks, even months, slowly making his presence more & more known until they know something funky’s going on. At that point, either they’ll snap & hunt him down, or he’ll just break in & take them. Either way, he’ll wanna have his fun even before kidnapping them—none of that trying to impress them bs

Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

Yeah, they are, but mostly cause he’s just so quiet & reserved that people don’t expect him to be so sadistic behind closed doors. Anyone that doesn’t know him well prolly thinks he’s a big ol’ softie, which he can be when he wants to, but they severely underestimate him. The creeps that know him a little better have an inkling of an idea as to what his true colours are, but he’s just so damn mysterious & elusive that it’s hard to get a good grasp on what he’s truly like. Only Masky and maybe EJ know what he’s really all about 👀😳

Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

Ooh, he’s got a whole arsenal of punishments. There’s the regular physical ones like tying them up & sorta just,,, leaving them there for a while, there’s spanking, whipping, cutting—y’know, the typical punishments you might expect. He might also starve them or deny them warmth & human contact until they’re begging for his attention. He’ll also emotionally manipulate them & gaslight them until they feel super bad for doing whatever they did. Boy just likes playing a whole lotta mind games w his darling, what can I say? 🙃

Tbh, he can get pretty creative with his punishments if he’s in a sadistic mood. And he likes to keep his darling on their toes, so there’s no knowing what he might do to them. Sometimes the anticipation of the punishment is worse than the punishment itself :”)

Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

Hmm... it depends how bratty they’d get. If his darling is the type to fight back a lot, he’ll take away most of their rights. No outside time, no getting untied, limited bathroom breaks, the whole shebang. But if they’re a bit more on the docile side, he’ll actually be pretty lenient. Like he’ll even leave the doors unlocked & let them go out whenever they please, so long as they come back before their curfew. The more obedient they are, the more rights they’ll have, so a lot of it depends on them tbh

Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

Hoodie’s a pretty patient dude by default. And for his darling of whom which he adores so dearly? Oh yeah, he’s got plenty of patience. That doesn’t mean he’ll let them get away with misbehaving tho; it just means he won’t get upset when/if they do misbehave. He’ll never snap or yell at them or anything. This boy’s got a wild sense of control so, despite everything else, at least his darling doesn’t have to be afraid of him getting mad & going manic 👉👈

Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

If ever his darling manages to leave or successfully escape, it’s cause he let them. Either he lost interest or he wanted them to return to their lives while he watches from the shadows. If he decides to keep them alive even after releasing them, he’ll still keep tabs on them, maybe popping in every now & then to remind them that their time spent with him wasn’t just a horrifying dream

If they die, however, and it wasn’t on purpose, he’ll be pretty upset. It’ll maybe be the only time he’ll have an outburst—when no one’s around to see it, ofc. But boy will just explode in a fit of rage & regret. He’ll completely wreck the room, taking out all of his aggression on the things around him—and boy won’t hold anything back. He might even inadvertently end up self-harming in the process too :”c

He’s not usually one to feel guilt, but he’d definitely blame himself for their death. He’d try to focus on his work to distract himself, to the point where he’d almost become a shell of a person. It’d take a good few months/years before he’d get over it. But I mean, he has killed some of his pretty close friends before, so he’ll prolly recover just fine. What’s one more body of his loved one to add to the count? :)

Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

Nah, not really. Aside from blaming himself if they accidentally die, like I mentioned, nothing really makes that mans feel guilty. He knows what he did is wrong, he just,, doesn’t care lmfao 😅

And he probably wouldn’t let them go, either, unless he gets bored of them. But even then, the chances of letting them go instead of killing them are about 50/50; boy really just Does Not Give A Shit™️

Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

Homeboy used to be a super sweet dude that wouldn’t hurt a fly, but Slender’s influence kinda brought out this twisted, fucked up amoral side of him. He already stalks & kills people for a living, so what’s the harm in bringing his work home sometimes, ya know?

He just wants to watch a cutie squirm in his possession—it makes him feel alive. Not to mention, those cat-and-mouse games go a long way in providing stress-relief from work. He just wants some good ol’ fashion fun & entertainment, can you really blame him? ;)

Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

Honestly, he,,,, he kinda likes it 😳😳 Lowkey gets off to seeing them cry ngl, it just gives him this fucked up kinda rush. If he sees them curled up and crying, he might go up to them & caress their face, cooing his usual deceit, or he’ll grip their cheeks & lick the tears off as a way of mocking them

He might cuddle or comfort them if he’s feeling particularly sweet. If they’ve been bad, however, he’s more likely to leave them crying in the corner w/o paying much mind to them. Screaming’s a similar case, too, except he might gag them & let them scream until their throat’s raw. Only if they’ve been good will he give them some positive attention uwu

How he reacts to them isolating themselves depends. If they’ve been good, he’ll find a way to coax them to stop, usually via some kind of manipulation, and if they’ve been bad, he’ll just,,, let them do as please. If they keep isolating, only then will he start losing patience. He’ll find some way to force them out of it. This includes, again, manipulation of all sorts, withholding food & warmth from them, all that “fun” kinda punishment stuff. But he won’t apologize. At that point, it almost becomes a game to see who caves in first, and homeboy will not lose

Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

While he does love his darling, they tend to be more of a plaything to him. And he might not stick to just one singular darling over the course of his life. He might let some go, or he might get bored & kill some others; it all depends on their chemistry. He gets obsessed with all of them, ofc, but he might legitimately care more deeply about some than others. In fact, the ones he really cares about, he‘ll even let himself be more vulnerable towards. But if he’s vulnerable w someone & eventually grows bored of them, he’ll kill them w/o releasing them, cause he doesn’t want anyone knowing his secrets. It can be difficult to do if he still loves them, but he’s gotta do what he’s gotta do

The whole thing’s really all just a game. It’s only if/when he manages to find the perfect victim that he’ll keep them forever. Someone who’s not too docile but who also isn’t afraid to fight back. They’ve gotta be pretty smart, resourceful & entertaining, too. He wants them to end up falling in love with him, but he also doesn’t want them to stop fighting him. It’s only once he finds the truly utmost perfect darling that he’ll keep them all to himself forever and ever~

Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

Oh god, he honestly,, doesn’t really have any weaknesses. If his darling wants to escape, they just gotta hope he’ll let them go. Either that, or they gotta find some way out of his twisted game. Even if they manage to escape, he’ll keep tabs on them, so they’ll never truly be free. Once he’s got his sights on someone, the only escape is death tbh :/

Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

Oh yeah, for sure lol

He’s a pretty damn sadistic boi uwu. He’d hurt them physically and emotionally; boy just doesn’t care. How much & how often he hurts them all depends on how well behaved they are 🥴

Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

Hm he’s not quite the type to worship his darling. He adores them & thinks they’re damn precious, but he likely won’t put them on a pedestal or anything. The only chance he’d grow to revere them is if they outsmart him & prove themselves time & time again in his little games

He also doesn’t really care what his darling thinks of him. He knows he’s a bad person & probably doesn’t deserve their love. He’s accepted it, really. But it won’t stop him from gaslighting & manipulating them until they possibly fall for him. Love just becomes part of the game at that point ¯\_(ヅ)_/¯

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

He likes to thoroughly think things through before making any decisions, so he’s likely to wait a good few weeks/months before making up his mind. He just wants to be certain before putting too much effort into things, ya know?

Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

Yeh, he probably would. If they can’t handle his mind games, they’ll break one way or another. But honestly, how cruel he is depends a lot on his darling. If they‘re nice & obedient, he’ll be sweet and rewarding as long as they don’t bore him too much, so breaking isn’t likely at that point. But if they’re super defiant, he’ll be much harsher, and if they keep ignoring his warnings, things will keep escalating until they break or he just kills them skdjkdls. He wouldnt want his perfect darling to break though, cause that’s just no fun. Boy realizes a lot of them are likely to break because he’s not exactly,,, the kindest of yanderes ( ͡ᵔ ͜ʖ ͡ᵔ)

[clairenatural]

destiel, 2k. dean’s self loathing but it ends up fluffy so it’s ok. pining. destiel finally becoming canon because sam just wants to drink smoothies in peace (this is a repost because the original got deleted!)

It’s a few weeks into all of them being back in the bunker, Sam and Dean and Jack and a rapidly humanizing Castiel, when Sam decides he’s had enough. It had been bad enough the past decade, when Castiel was always leaving and there was always another apocalypse to distract them, but the past few weeks have become damn near domestic and the mutual pining is driving him up the wall.

Sam finally snaps at a small bar in Lebanon. Cas is caught up by a pretty girl at the bar and Dean has barely touched his beer, instead watching the interaction with a mixture of longing and heartbreak, and Sam can’t take it anymore.

“Dude,” he starts, and when that fails, “Dean.” Dean looks at him. He frowns.

“What, Sam?”

“Just go talk to him. Or drag him back to the bunker and talk to him there. I’ll go stay with Eileen this weekend, I’ll even take Jack with me—just please, Dean. For me.”

Dean blinks at him, glowers a bit, and takes a sip of his beer. “Dunno what you’re talking about.”

Sam gives him a look, unimpressed. “It’s been ten years. And—” he puts up a hand to stop the protests. “And listen, I know it’s been…rough, but by some miracle things are calm right now. So just tell Cas you’re in love with him so I can stop feeling like I’m interrupting something every time I walk into the kitchen.” 

He shudders a bit, remembering the day before when he walked into the bunker’s kitchen to see Dean and Cas just staring at each other over two mugs of coffee, hands still touching where Castiel had handed the mug to Dean. Sam had cleared his throat and Castiel had jumped, spilling the coffee, and Dean had glared at his brother as he reached for a towel.

Sam had just wanted a smoothie.

He glances back across the bar table to where Dean is staring at him, open mouthed, and watches as his expression shifts to a glower as he apparently gives up on trying to deny it. Sam counts that as a small victory in itself. 

“Why? So he can freak out and leave again? Dude’s just starting to get comfortable, Sam, I’m not about to chase him away.” Dean’s tone is angry, but Sam knows him well enough to see through the facade. There’s no real anger there. Just fear.

His heart hurts a bit, for both his brother and their best friend. “Dean,” he starts, gently, leaning forward in his chair. “He’s an angel. He’s been here since the beginning of humanity. He put your soul back together. Do you really think he doesn’t already know?”

Dean’s staring at him again, as if he’s never considered that before. He looks apprehensive, and mildly terrified, but before he can respond Castiel appears back at their table. He slides a beer across the table to Sam, then to Dean, who doesn’t look at him, before settling down himself. There’s a half second of awkward silence before Dean changes the subject, and Sam sighs. Nobody could say he hadn’t tried.

----------------------------------------

Dean can’t sleep. 

He’s staring up at the ceiling of his bedroom, replaying the last few things Sam had said. He’s an angel, Sam had said, as if that wasn’t obvious. And it was, it is, but—it’s too easy to forget sometimes, especially the many times he’s ended up more human than angel, that Castiel is thousands of years old. Dean never forgets that he’s an angel, of course. That’s one of the staples of the voice in his head, the one constantly telling him to keep his feelings for Castiel a secret to the grave. Over the past ten years Angel of the Lord has become nearly synonymous with too good for you and better than you would ever deserve.

It's what being an angel means that Dean doesn’t think about. That Castiel has spent millennia as nothing more than a wavelength of light and celestial intent before giving it all up to drag Dean out of Hell. That he was a soldier, a seraph, a term that Dean thinks he knows but also doesn’t fully understand the weight of. Castiel misses a pop culture reference and Dean forgets that he understands the physics of the cosmos on a level his human brain could never comprehend. Or, not forget—he could never forget. Dean just doesn’t like to look too closely at it, because staring everything that Castiel really is in the face just makes the voice louder. Makes him feel like just a speck of dust in comparison, unworthy of the angel’s presence or time or attention. Makes him wonder why Castiel has given up everything that he is and was, everything he had since the beginning of time, for that one speck of dust.

So maybe Sam is right. And Dean hates that. Because maybe Sam is right, but Castiel has only stayed over the years because he has nowhere else to go. And he has nowhere to go because of Dean. Because the very touch of you corrupts. When Castiel first laid a hand on you in Hell, he was lost, Hester said. Because too much heart was always Castiel’s problem, Samandriel said. Because I’m hunted, I rebelled, and I did it - all of it - for you, Castiel himself told him, once upon a time. I’m doing this for you, Dean. I’m doing this because of you.

And Dean had reacted in anger, like he always did. Like he always does. And Cas keeps coming back anyway.

He needs a drink.

He sighs as he hauls himself off his bed, creeping silently through the bunker on the way to the kitchen, but pauses when he hears the murmuring of the television coming from Castiel’s room. It’s a bad decision but he turns towards Castiel’s bedroom door and pauses for a moment, listening to the soft sounds of a nature documentary through the wood. What are you doing? The voice scolds. Sure, Dean. Creep outside his bedroom at midnight, that’ll make him feel real comfortable.

The television clicks off. Dean assumes he’s going to sleep, something he needs to do more and more lately, and is about to keep going to the kitchen when—

“Dean?” Cas calls. Dean freezes. He could leave quietly, and they’d both pretend it had never happened. They were good at that. He could also make some sort of excuse and continue on his merry way. He doesn’t do either.

“Can I come in?” He asks instead, and Castiel says “yes,” and then Dean is pushing open the bedroom door.

Castiel is sitting on his bed, cross-legged, wearing a pair of sweatpants they’d picked up from the local thrift store and a t-shirt that is (was?) definitely Dean’s. The sight makes his heart clench. He hadn’t considered the potential consequences when he’d dumped a bunch of his old clothing on Castiel’s bed, and it sure isn’t making anything easier.

“You sleeping tonight?” Dean asks, and Castiel shakes his head.

“I don’t need to.” He pauses. “You should be, though. Is everything alright?”

Dean shifts on his feet. He shoves his hands deep in his pockets. He looks back at Castiel, meeting his gaze. There's something so uniquely deep about it—it wasn’t there in Jimmy, and even now, nearly human, his blue eyes feel centuries old. But not like the ocean. The blue eyes/ocean metaphor is overplayed, and when Dean looks into Castiel’s eyes he doesn’t feel like he’s swimming in an endless azure ocean. He feels like he’s drowning in the Marianas Trench.

“Do you know?” Dean asks. He doesn’t mean to, but he isn’t surprised when the words come out of his mouth.

Cas blinks at him, then frowns. “Know what?”

“You know.” Eloquent as always.

Cas quirks an eyebrow. “I know many things, Dean, but even with my full grace I can’t read your thoughts.”

Dean blushes. He hopes the darkness of the room, illuminated only by Castiel’s bedside lamp, obscures it. “I guess prayers aren’t quite the same, huh.”

There’s a loaded pause. Cas shifts, moving away from the headboard to sit at the edge of his bed, facing Dean. “Praying is more abstract than humans think it is,” he starts. “Gratitude is often close enough. Longing can come through as prayer. Love… when love gets close enough to worship, it’s the loudest of all.” He pauses there, searching for a reaction. Dean isn’t sure what he’s looking for, but he doesn’t even think he’s breathing—he’d stopped as soon as Castiel said love.

After an excruciating moment, Castiel continues. “So if that’s what you mean…”

Dean braces for impact.

“Then yes, Dean. I think I knew before you did.”

And, well. There it is. For some reason, Dean isn’t running away. He thinks it’s probably because Cas isn’t running away this time—and because he’d come back. He still comes back. Regardless of the many, many times Dean had been the one to push him away.

So “I love you,” Dean says, quietly, voice rough, because there’s really no point in not saying it anymore. Then, “I mean…I love you.” He clarifies, even as saying it twice sets off alarm bells, because if there’s one thing they’re good at it’s miscommunication.

Castiel blinks at him. “I know,” he replies, puzzled. “Is that not what we were just talking about?”

Dean stares at him. “You’re still here.”

The confusion on the angel’s face deepens. “Yes, because I love you too. I thought that was obvious.” In another lifetime he would’ve used air quotes.

What.

Dean pauses for a minute, reeling, trying to figure out if he misheard.

“Obvious,” he clarifies, as if that’s the word he’s struggling with.

“Yes.”

Dean is still staring, feeling something akin to shock. Obvious?

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I have. Multiple times, in multiple ways.”

Dean thinks back to profound bond and I always come when you call and I’ll watch over you and I could go with you and hundreds of moments in between.

Oh.

“You didn’t care that I never got the message?”

“I’m thousands of years old, Dean. Ten years is nothing. I was willing to wait.”

“Jesus Christ,” Dean replies, because that is a whole bunch he doesn’t have the energy to unpack, and his brain still isn’t completely caught up to what’s happening.

“No, I’m Castiel.”

It’s an old joke, said with a smile, and that combined with the absurdity of the situation means Dean can’t help but laugh. He looks up and makes eye contact with Castiel, who grins back, and suddenly there’s way too much space between them.

Dean crosses the bedroom in a few strides, and Cas stands to meet him, and then they’re kissing, and Dean isn’t even sure who started it but they’ve both been waiting long enough that he isn’t sure it matters. He has his arms wrapped around Castiel’s waist, clinging to the soft fabric of the t-shirt that was once his own, when something in the back of his head starts screaming that this is a bad idea and he’s just going to leave tomorrow and are you dumb enough to think you can actually have this?

But then Castiel makes a soft noise in the back of his throat and deepens the kiss, pulling them impossibly closer together, and for all its years of practice Dean’s self-loathing can’t come up with a response to that.

Castiel pulls back first, flushed and breathing heavily, and Dean chases his lips for a moment before Cas catches him in his gaze, in endless blue. Suddenly, Dean isn’t drowning anymore. He’s on a lifeboat, and the trench is impossibly deep beneath him but he feels safer than he has in a long time. Home, his brain supplies, helpful for the first time in years, and Dean smiles.

Cas smiles back, bringing a hand up to Dean’s face to trace his thumb along his cheekbone. “Will you stay here tonight?” he asks, soft, and Dean leans in to press an equally soft kiss to his forehead.

Tonight and every night, he thinks. “’Course,” he says, and then leans in to kiss him again.

Two mornings later, Sam walks into the bunker’s kitchen to find Castiel pushed up against a counter, Dean kissing his way down his neck. He yelps and retreats around the corner.

“Come on, guys,” he yells, from safety, and the two have the audacity to laugh.

“You did this, Sammy,” Dean reminds.

“I said I wanted to stop interrupting things in my own kitchen,” Sam counters, but he can’t find it in his heart to be angry. He sighs. “Whatever. You know I’m happy for you. I just—” he pauses. “Can I at least come get my smoothie?”

[pretend-writer]

Fly With Me (Steve Harrington x platonic!reader)

Requested

Summary: There is a new girl at Hawkins High School and Steve couldn’t help but become very intrigued. 

Pairing: Steve Harrington x platonic!reader

Title Reference: Fly With Me x Jonas Brothers

Word Count: 1.2k words

Warning: swearing, mention of bullying

✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤

Steve pov;

Summer had ended and it was my last first day of high school. I've been looking forward to senior year the entire summer break, mostly because I was ready to leave Hawkins High.

Little did I know that I'd be looking forward to more this year.

It started like every other typical day. Meeting Robin at my locker while she spoke her sarcasm of the day. Some random couple being touchy with each other in the corner.

Then I saw her enter the front door.

She wasn't anyone I've seen before but she had a beautiful smile on her face. She greeted everyone in the hallway as if she'd known them from before.

The new girl didn't have "the obnoxious popular girl" vibe either. I could already tell she was liked by many, probably made some friends over the summer as she moved to a new neighborhood.

I wish that I'd saw her over the summer, that way I could've tried to become friends with her. It was just something about her presence that made me drawn to her.

'What are you staring at?' Robin nudged me on my sides, then looking at the direction I had my eyes on. 'Ah, pretty girl.'

'No, it's not like that.' She was a beautiful girl, I wasn't going to lie but reason for me being intrigued wasn't that. I wasn't quite sure yet but I felt drawn to her. 'She's just...'

Robin's brow raised, watching me stutter my words. 'Yeah Steve. She's just.'

'Whatever.' I rolled my eyes, walking away from my locker after grabbing my notebook and textbook. 'It's just something about her I can't grasp.'

'Well, when you find out let me know.' Robin waved, going the opposite direction.

I continued to walk towards my first class of the day with my new schedule in one hand. As I approached English class, I saw Billy messing with one of the kids I knew from my class from last year.

Ignoring all that was happening, I turned into my classroom and sat on the first seat I saw. By the window, where I can gaze the outdoors, counting down the days when I can finally get out of here for good.

'Did y'all see that?' Carl from my Algebra class from last year came barging in, talking to his friends that were in my new English class. 'That new girl totally told Billy off!'

'Oh that pretty one from the mall?' Charles stood up, following Carl into the hallway as they chattered about the rest of the way out.

It was a complete surprise, knowing that the new girl stood up to Billy. Maybe I should've stayed out in the hallway for a little bit longer, that would've been great to watch.

I couldn't help but have a grin on my face, for having Billy put in his place after practically running over so many kids that didn't deserve his bullshit. My day was already starting very well and the day barely started yet.

Then there she was, entering the classroom with couple of books in one hand. She looked around then met her eyes with mine. My heart skipped a beat a little, feeling my cheeks turning red from shyness.

She approached me with a smile on her face, taking a seat right next to me. 'Hi, this is Mr. Perkin's class right?'

'Ah. Yeah, yeah. English 12.' I tried smiling back. 'You're new here right? I've never seen you around.'

'Just moved in last month. My name's Y/N.'

'I'm Steve.' I was nervous talking to her, it was worse because I wanted to continue speaking to her but I didn't know what else to say. 'I've heard what you did with Billy. That's impressive.'

Mentally rolling my eyes at myself, I knew that was so stupid. I didn't want to mess up my chance of being friends with her.

But it didn't matter to her, she was kind enough to talk to me. 'I didn't do anything, just talked to him in a way he probably wanted to get approached.'

'Which was what?'

'He probably just needs a friend, you know?'

I watched her take her things from her backpack, I hope I didn't look stupid or desperate. Y/N was a mystery, really hard to read what was on her mind or what she thought about this place, or even what her first impression was of me.

'Er, do you want to eat lunch with me and my friend today?' I blurted out, hoping that she'd take my offer.

'Sure, that'll be great.' She agreed without hesitation. I just grinned, trying to hide my huge excitement so I wouldn't scare her off. 'I'll totally meet you at the cafeteria.'

The whole morning I was excited, lunch was all I ever thought of the entire English class and the rest of the classes I attended before lunch. I've never looked forward to going into the cafeteria this much since elementary school when they served pizza for lunch.

I was too thrilled, to a point where I skipped going to my lockers and headed straight to the cafeteria. I had all my books and backpack with me, looking for the best seat where Y/N can spot me as soon as she walked in.

After waiting about five minutes, she walked in. Walked in with Robin. I waved at them, thinking of scenarios as to how Robin out of all people were coming into lunch with a girl like Y/N.

'Dude, she's the funniest person I've ever met. No wonder you were drooling over her this morning.' Robin hit my shoulder, beaming as she talked about Y/N.

Shifting my eyes in the opposite direction, I bit my lips, feeling my cheeks getting warmer. 'Okay, I wasn't drooling. I said she seemed like a cool girl.'

Y/N giggled, 'I wish you'd told me Steve was the friend you were talking about. He's the guy I was talking about that was in my English class.'

Robin's eyes widened, started laughing as she remembered something. 'Oh, ha! That makes sense now. Hilarious, Y/N.'

Quickly, I turned to Y/N. 'Wh-what?! What did you say about me?'

Y/N looked over at Robin, their eyes meeting and once again chuckling amongst each other. They both said in sync, 'Nothing.'

'Ah great. You got Y/N against me already. Great tactic really.'

Robin grinned, 'Yup. She's gonna be my best friend. Already replaced you for my number one favorite on my phone.'

'Wow, I'm flattered.' Y/N said.

'I bet I wasn't even in the number one.'

'You're right, Dustin was.'

The two continued to giggle, passing by as they left to get their lunch trays. I smiled, watching Robin and Y/N talking and already getting along.

Maybe that's was it was; the reason why deep in my heart I felt like I needed to talk to Y/N. She was my soulmate that I was supposed to meet, a friendship that was supposed to flourish, someone that I needed.

She was already becoming great friends with Robin, someone that was in my life that I couldn't live without. If that wasn't a sign, I didn't know what was.

And that's when I realized, senior year wasn't going to be so bad. As a matter of fact, it could probably be the best year yet.

[frywen-bumbles]

The Way to a Man's Heart Goes Through His... Cat? Ch2

Days 6-7: Jaskier gets some unexpected messages and looks after house plants

AO3

Master of Music.

Jaskier loves the sound of it.

What he doesn't love is the half-empty document staring at him from his laptop screen.

'Historical Facts, Recent Myths, Current Connections: The Witchers in Historical and Contemporary Music'

He has all of his research material on hand. He has read through it. Several times. But writing the actual research down isn't happening.

Gods above how much he wishes he could just compose new songs and throw his brain out of the window. He doesn't even believe in any gods but if praying will help writing to happen he's willing to try.

Roach sits on top of the bookshelf, in one of her favourite places to... stare at him. And judge. Or maybe Jaskier feels like the cat is judging him. She hasn't warmed up to him during the first week at all, all she does is stare at him whatever he does but doesn't let him close enough to touch yet alone to brush.

"You know, Roachie if you won't let me touch you soon your owner will have to shave you naked when he returns."

Roach doesn't answer.

Of course, she won't answer. He must be going bonkers. Maybe a walk will help. He doesn't hold high hopes, everything is going shite anyway, what good could one walk do?

He snaps a quick silly selfie of himself and Roach and sends it to Roach's owner, like every day. It doesn't take long for the mark to turn blue to note the message has been seen. No answer, but at this point, Jaskier is not surprised. There has been no answer in the previous days, why break the tradition now? Some people just aren't made for small talk and Jaskier isn't going to force it. Not that he'd want to see the man. No, that would be ridiculous.

He gets lost in his thoughts, trying to figure out how to put together his thesis in some sort of coherent way as he walks to the nearby park. His phone buzzes in his pocket for a new message. He digs it out, not giving it much thought expecting to see a message from Essi or Pricilla. What he sees makes him almost drop his phone in his shock.

Cat dad answered? And with a photo?

A honk makes him realise he's standing in the middle of the road like an idiot and he crosses to the other side to reach the park. Only it feels like he doesn't need to have a walk anymore, this is more excitement than he's had in the entire week.

He opens the message.

A selfie with a blonde girl and a man stare back at him. He feels like his heart will stop.

"Essi?" Jaskier has to talk to someone. He knows he shouldn't, he promised absolute confidentiality. But he will burst if he doesn't talk about this to someone. He will absolutely without a doubt die.

"What is it, Buttercup?" Essi drawls like she has all the time in the world.

"Cat dad it insanely hot!"

"Whaaat? He texted back?"

"Yes! He's off the wall hot? I can't deal with this! How am I supposed to just sit working on his desk knowing what the man looks like? He will haunt my dreams, Essi!"

"Well, spill the tea! What does he look like?"

"You know I can't tell you, just know he's the hottest dude I have ever seen, okay? I can't deal with this. How am I supposed to write academic bullshite when his picture sits on my phone and I could just... look at it whenever I want to?

"Jaskier, for fucks sake. Your thesis is already a year late. You have been promised a place in the doctoral programme. If you keep sitting on your arse with this, instead of being the brightest student at the Uni, you will fail, understand? Get your shite together and stop falling in love with every person you happen to see."

"But, Essiiii... He's really hot!"

"I know, darling. Just keep it in your pants until you've finished with your thesis. Then I give you my permission to go chase the hot cat daddy."

"Melitele forbid, Essi, you're no fun. I wasn't going to chase him! I don't even know where he is. I just can't get over the hotness, okay?"

"Mm hmm, I know you too well. Get back to work or do I need to remind you why you took up pet sitting?"

"No. I'm sorry. I'll take a small walk and then get right back to writing, I promise."

Jaskier does not get back to writing.

He stares at the picture in his phone trying to figure out how a gorgeous man like that could have such an impersonal home. The man has his hair tied back in a messy bun, revealing an undercut which tells the milky white locks are natural. Jaskier didn't know he had a thing for blonds, but he sure as hell does now.

The girl's young, maybe around ten years old, Jaskier isn't sure. Kids aren't exactly his forte, all of his friends are still firmly stuck in their studies instead of having families of their own.

The picture had been taken by the girl, the grin wide on her face suggesting taking it had been her idea. But the soft smile the man has as he looks at the girl is melting Jaskier's heart.

If only someone would look at him like that he could die happy.

A crash from upstairs startles him enough to put down his phone and look at the time. Jaskier tries and fails not to fall into despair. He has wasted another day, not a single word written and how he wishes he could just throw up all of his ideas into coherent text but it is not happening.

He closes his laptop. It's no use. Going like this he'll never graduate.

Roach stares at him from the door, covered in dust and... definitely more dust.

"I'm a mess, aren't I, Roachie?"

Roach doesn't answer. Instead, she screams and runs downstairs, expecting him to follow like a good servant. His phone buzzes for a new message and Jaskier taps it open.

<Water the plants. Remember to brush the cactus.>

Remember to what the what now? He stares at the message, trying (and failing) to ignore the image above it.

"What the fuck?" he mutters to himself as he makes his way downstairs to stare at the house plants he has given no thought at all up to this point. On the windowsill in the kitchen is a lone cactus, right next to where Roach likes to sit and look to the yard. A cactus completely covered in cat hair and Roach is happy to provide how that particular thing happened. She jumps next to the plant and rubs her head against it, leaving even more hair on the spines.

"Brush the cactus. Okay then..."

<How do I brush a cactus?>

<What the fuck Jask?>

Jaskier snaps a picture of the cactus and sends it to the group chat with Essi and Pricilla.

<How do I get rid of the hair???>

He gets no response. ... appears on the screen several times before crying laughing emojis fill the screen.

<Thanks a bunch -.- >

He goes to dig through the cabinet where he found cat things and discovers a comb.

"That'll have to do," he sighs and gets to combing the cactus, careful not to harm it. In the end, the cactus comes unharmed from the endeavour but unfortunately, Jaskier doesn't. His palm is adorned with spines he spends a good five minutes plucking out with tweezers.

<If i die bc of a cactus related infection I'm blaming you>

<omg what did you do>

<Squeezed a ball of hair in my hand but it was filled with spines from the cactus>

<lmao>

<lmao???? I'm suffering and you're laughing??? Essi, Pris is being horrible>

<it is only what you deserve>

<OMG rude!>

<kissy face emoji>

Jaskier looks up from his phone when he hears water splashing. He doesn't even want to know what toy the cat has decided to drown now but if he doesn't hurry the whole kitchen will be filled with water.

Roach is happily playing with a toy mouse dunking it in her water bowl and tossing it around, spreading water everywhere.

"Roach, please? Could you just... not do that?" Jaskier begs as he fishes the mouse out of the water bowl and puts it to dry in a cabinet. "This may come as a surprise to you but I do not enjoy mopping the floors after you." He complains as he dutifully takes kitchen towels and dries the kitchen. At least it's better than the time Roach tucked the entire kitchen rug in the water bowl while he was out.

"You are a menace," Jaskier tells Roach after he has cleaned up everything. Roach meows.

Jaskier feels like he has barely fallen asleep when he wakes up. At first, he doesn't understand what woke him, but another yowl has him wide awake. What has him jumping out of the bed and run is the sound of pumping, like someone was trying to unclog a toilet.

"Roach you bastard, where are you? Please don't throw up on a carpet!!" Jaskier tries to find the cat based on the noise, stumbling in the dark. To his horror, the noise is coming from the second floor, where he was absolutely forbidden to go.

"Roaaaaach...!" he whines and makes his way up the stairs.

The view that awaits him when he flips the light on is totally unexpected. It is so unexpected Jaskier has to pinch himself to believe he's actually standing in a real room.

It is, and really the only way to describe it is every little girl's dream room. The room spans the entire second floor, ceiling low on the sides showing it was renovated from an attic, pinks, purples and blues adorning the furnishing.

And right on the middle of the white rug is the vomit.

"Fuck."

Jaskier collects the rug and carries it in the bathroom and spends an ungodly amount of time washing it, hoping against all the odds, the stain would leave.

It doesn't.

Come morning and Jaskier is sure it's all been a weird dream. Unfortunately for him, the stained rug awaits him in the bathroom when he goes to brush his teeth and he groans in frustration.

Roach meows at the closed door and scratches it until he lets her in so she can stare at him. Jaskier sighs and snaps a quick selfie, hair mussed and toothbrush still in his mouth and sends it. No need to prolong it, now he can hopefully focus on writing.

He's drinking his third cup of tea when his phone buzzes for a new message.

<Roach's hair is as messy as yours>

Jaskier stares at the message, sent from an unknown number.

<Who is this?>

<Youre looking after daddys cat>

<You're the girl! From the picture!> <I'm Julian but you can call me Jaskier> <Wait you shouldn't text strange men does your dad know you've texted me?>

<You're not strange you just told me your name> <I'm bored daddy went out with grandpa and im left with uncle> <Hes no fun> <I'm Fiona>

<Hello Fiona, it's nice to meet you>

Jaskier doesn't know what else he's supposed to say. How does one talk with children? Just like normal people? Right?

Wait!

Jaskier comes to a sudden realisation; now he has the perfect opportunity to ask cheat codes for Roach to get the cat to, well maybe not like him but to tolerate him.

<How do I brush Roach? She doesn't let me near her>

The screen fills with laughing emojis earning a sigh from Jaskier. No help then.

<Give her cheese> <Shes crazy about it but only gets it after shes brushed>

Of course, why hasn't he thought to give the cat cheese? Maybe because it doesn't make any sense. Who gives cat cheese when there are perfectly good cat treats available?

Nothing else about this makes any sense either and since writing isn't happening nor is Fiona texting anything else he makes his way to the fridge and digs out a block of cheese and cuts a piece.

Roach runs at him screaming. She thrills and screams and rubs herself against the drawer where all of her brushes are.

Roach doesn't purr when he combs through her fur, but feeding her bits of cheese every time she gets too annoyed helps and like a miracle Jaskier manages to brush a cat-sized pile of loose fur to show for his efforts. He gives Roach the last piece when he has finished and tries to pet her, but she sprints away from him with an annoyed meow.

Maybe Roach doesn't hate him as much as he thought after all.

[lukatheselkie]

FrUk Week Day Six - FACE

@frukweek2020

Uh. This got INCREDIBLY out of hand. The characters took over and they didn’t want me to stop writing until this was finished. Even though that was roughly 6,600 words long. Human AU. Alfred and Matthieu are elementary schoolers, and they each have a single dad. This is the story of how the boys met, and dragged their fathers into a relationship.

High key I love writing child Alfred, he’s adorable. And Matthieu.

Warnings: Cussing. There’s a blowjob at the end, BUT I’ve marked where to stop reading if you want to read to that point. The sheer freaking length of this thing deserves a warning, though it’s not technically needed.

    Alfred and Matthieu literally run into each other on the playground at school. As they stand and look at each other, their similarities stick out to one another almost immediately. Alfred is the first to react. “You have my face!” He screams, pointing at the shy boy. Matthieu flinches back, bringing his hands up to cover his ears. Why did he have to run into potentially the loudest boy in the entire elementary school on his first day? And where are his glasses!? He drops to the ground, and runs his hands over the soft, slightly bouncy pad meant to keep kids from hurting themselves too much. The strange boy sits next to him, and holds out his hand. “Here. These are yours, right?” He reaches out carefully and grabs the thing offered to him. To his relief, it is his glasses. He slips them on and scowls at the boy. Apparently this is an invitation for him to start talking.

    “What’s your name? Mine’s Alfred! Are you new here? I’ve never seen you here before! I think I would have noticed someone that looks so similar to me. How old are you? I’m ten! Do you think we could be brothers? I’m adopted! Dad says he doesn’t like keeping secrets from me, so I know that, but others that are adopted might not. It’s okay if you don’t know! I can ask your parent...s!? Do you have one parent, like me, or two? Hey, we should switch places! You’ll really love dad! He’s kind and caring and he makes the best scones! Though everyone else seems to dislike them, I’m not sure why. I think he’s the best cook in the whole wide world. If you don’t want to switch, you should come over after school! I know my address, so I don’t get lost. Do you know yours? No, probably not, if you just moved here. But we should totally have a sleepover! Then dad can bring us both to school tomorrow. Or we can have a weekend sleepover! Tomorrow’s Friday, after all! How does that sound? I’m excited! I made a new friend that looks just like me! Well, almost. What’s this?” He reaches out and tugs on Matthieu’s curl. He shoves his hands away quickly, cheeks flushed.

    “Don’t touch that please. It’s really hard to get it to stay how I like it!” Alfred scrunches up his nose at him.

    “You’re too quiet. I can barely hear you! Try speaking louder. It’s so much fun when you can be heard! And why didn’t you answer any of my questions? Oh, your glasses are different from mine! We’d have to take each other’s if we want to switch. And I’d have to get this stupid cowlick into a curl.” Alfred starts rocking back and forth happily. “You’d have to make your curl a cowlick! I think you’d look cute with one. Hmm, you have purple eyes though. I don’t. Mine are blue! I’m sure dad won’t notice though. He’s not exactly the most observant. I love him, but he’s sometimes wrapped up in his own stuff. It must be hard, being an adult. Say, why haven’t you answered my questions again?”

    “Because you won’t be quiet long enough for me to speak!” He narrows his eyes at the boy. “You’re obnoxious.” He sighs heavily.

    “What’s that mean? Is it a compliment? I’m going to take it as a compliment! Dad says those are nice things people say about you, to you sometimes.” He pauses long enough to take a breath. Finally.  “I miss dad. Maybe we shouldn’t switch. I want to see him when I go home. Not that I think your parents won’t be loving!” He stops rocking, and frowns deeply at his new friend. “Hey, should I stop talking to give you a chance to talk back?” A nod, then silence.

    “Alright. Now that you’re done. My name is Matthieu, I’m also ten. Daddy and I just moved here last week. It took a bit for me to get into the school system. I don’t want to switch places, or have a sleepover with you. I don’t know you.” He answers the bare minimum, despite knowing every question that was asked. He’s not adopted. He would have already been told that! ...Right? Now he’s not so sure. He looks over Alfred, frowning. He looks like my twin. It can’t be. Can it?

    “Pfffft! You still call your Dad ‘Daddy’! We’re too old for that, dude! We’re big boys now! Men.” He hops up, placing his hands on his hips in a superhero pose. “See? Men! Little men. We don’t need to call them that anymore!” Matthieu hugs himself. He doesn’t like this loud boy. He’s too energetic. He plops back down next to him, and lays his head on his shoulder. He hopes he doesn’t have head lice. “Though it would be nice to be able to call him that again. I might try it. I miss it. Thanks! Oh! Here!” He pulls something out of his pocket. “I’ll share my scone with you for that! You’ll love it.” Alfred feels the boy next to him shudder, and wraps an arm around him tightly. “It’s not cold out here. Why are you cold? Are you sick? Do you need to go to the nurse? Want me to walk with you? I will! I’ll even ask if we can go. You’re too quiet to be heard by them. Hey, that’s a good idea! I’ll be your voice from now on! Tell me what you want to say as quiet as you want, and I’ll say it as loud as I want! That’ll be great! I can’t wait to do that!”

    “I’m alright,” he mumbles, staring at his fingers. He very much dislikes that he likes having someone his age hug him. Sure, cuddles and hugs and kisses from his father are nice, but he always feels too big. “If I ask Daddy about sleeping over and he says yes, will you hold me like this the entire time?”

    “Mmhmm!” He nods his head dramatically. “I will! Anything to make my new friend happy!”

    “Then your father isn’t cooking. I’ll ask Daddy if he can make us something. He’s a professional chef.” Normally, he wouldn’t gloat about that. But he has to do something to stage this kid up. He’s got so much confidence, and courage, and everything Matthieu has ever wanted. It feels like the only thing he has on him is his father’s job.

    “Profes… What’s that word mean?”

    “He’s very good at it.” Well, and maybe his vocabulary. But that’s nothing to brag about. That makes him a nerd. Prime picking on material. That’s part of the reason he stays so quiet and  to himself. He doesn’t want to be picked on again.

    “Ooooooh yes! Please! I wanna eat something he makes! Dad isn’t a chef, but he’s still the bestest cook to me! I have to say that though, he’s my dad. And I love him very much. Don’t worry though! I’ll be honest about your dad’s food. I can’t wait!” Alfred hugs his new friend tighter. “Do you live with anyone else? If not, we should totally have a mega sleepover! You and I, and our dads! I’m sure they’d love to get to know each other. What parent doesn’t want to get to know their child’s best friend’s parent?” Matthieu shrugs, not knowing what else to do. He’s never really had a friend before now. “Here!” He shoves a piece of paper into his hand. “It’s my dad’s number. I’m supposed to keep that paper in my pocket for safety reasons, but I want your dad to call him! I’ve got it memorized, I’ll write another one when we go back in. Please have him call when you get home! I want to be able to do this sleepover tomorrow! And let’s go all weekend!” He looks up, and frowns deeply. “Awwww man! It’s time to go in. You know what to do, right? I’ll talk to you later!” He stands and runs off. What a strange boy. He glances down at the paper in his hand. This is going to be interesting.

~

    Alfred bursts into his father’s classroom, a million things to say about his new friend. Arthur has to take both of his hands, squeeze, and tell him to breathe. He closes his eyes to do so, and takes maybe ten deep breaths. “Do you think you can answer my questions without getting off topic now?” He nods frantically, and his dad smiles at him. “Thank you. What’s your new friend’s name?”

    “Matthew! No, that’s not right. He said it really weird, I think it’s another language.”

    “Perhaps. I’ll ask his father when he calls. You said he was going to do that, right?”

    “Mmhmm! Can we have a sleepover tomorrow?” Arthur sighs.

    “We’ll have to see. I’ve got a test tomorrow, and I might need extra time grading. I can’t watch the two of you and grade at the same time.”

    “His dad can watch us! He’s coming over too, I think. He’s cooking for us. He’s a profesonel chef! And then he’s going to stay the night with you, if that’s okay? That way we can have a mega sleepover! Matthew and I, and you and his dad! We should watch movies and cuddle!” Arthur takes in the information without struggle. He’s assuming Alfred meant professional chef. He’ll have to help him with his pronunciation on that. As for the sleepover…

    “I would very much like to have a sleepover with him as well, but I’m sure he has to work. I don’t mind watching the two of you if I can get my grading done. I will speak with him about that. If he doesn’t mind staying until I’m finished, you two can have your sleepover.”

    “Yay!” He sticks his bottom lip out in a pout, and crosses his arms over his chest. “I wanna tell him now though. Can he hurry and call!?”

    “Alfred. You know not everyone works here. His dad might not even be home when he gets there. Or he might stay somewhere else until he can be picked up. Give it a little bit, alright? Here. Why don’t you draw me a picture of Matthew?” He hands him a pile of printer paper and some crayons. “That way I can know how similar you two truly are.” He runs over to one of the desks excitedly. Thank goodness that distraction worked.

~

    “Daddy!” Matthieu runs toward Francis. He picks him up, and hugs him close. The boy buries his nose in his hair, smiling brightly.

    “Oh? I see that smile. What brought that on? Did something good happen on your first day at your new school?” He nods, giggling quietly.

    “It did! I made a new friend! I think. He looks a lot like me, Daddy. Do you know if I have a brother? We’re the same age, so he’d be my twin. He says he’s adopted, too, so I… I thought it might be possible. He said something about me being adopted? It made me think. I’ve never heard you talk about mom.” Francis sighs heavily.

    “I didn’t want you to find out this way. And I’m so sorry for not telling you earlier. I just… I didn’t want you to love me any less, I suppose. You are adopted. But that doesn’t mean I don’t see you as my perfect little boy. I love you very much. You know that, right?”

    “Mm, I do!” He giggles again as he nods, wrapping his arms as far around Francis’ shoulders as he can. “I sort of figured I was adopted after he said that. It’s okay! I love you exactly the same. No! Actually, I love you more now! You chose me. You didn’t have to, but you did.” He kisses his cheek. “So don’t feel bad for it, okay, Daddy? I promise it doesn’t hurt! And I’m sure there’s a reason you didn’t get Alfred, if he’s my twin.”

    “He is. I desperately wanted him as well, but he had already been adopted. I’m guessing by his dad now. I was told he wanted both of you, too, but was denied. He couldn’t bear to leave both of you though, so he adopted your brother. Not that there was anything wrong with you! Alfred would cry without him. He adopted the one that seemed hurt more by his absence. You’ve always been my sweet independent boy, so that makes sense. I’m glad you two have found each other though. Who knew we would move to the same area?” He laughs softly.

    “It’s like fate wanted us together! All four of us.” He squeezes his shoulders lightly. “Alfred wants us to spend the night with him and his dad. Both of us. He called it a mega sleepover. You’re supposed to call to talk to him, when we get home. I got his number!” He tugs the paper out of his pocket and hands it to his father.

    “Alright. I can at least call. But let’s go home first, oui?” He walks toward the vehicle, smiling at his son’s excited nod.

~

    Alfred perks up when he hears Arthur’s phone ringing. That must be Matthew’s dad! “Hello, Arthur speaking.” There’s a quiet laugh from the other end that makes him blush a bit.

    “Hello, Arthur. Are you Alfred’s father? I’m Matthieu’s father, Francis. He told me to call you?” So that’s how it’s pronounced.

    “Ah, yes! It’s nice to speak with you. Alfred tells me he met your son today and made plans with him. I apologize. He can get carried away. He shouldn’t have decided on anything without our input.” He gives his son a pointed look.

    “It’s alright! I don’t mind. I’d do anything for Matthieu’s first friend. So he mentioned the mega sleepover?”

    “That he did. I told him we might have to work. But if you’re off tomorrow afternoon, they can have their sleepover. I may have to grade papers and I can’t watch them without help while I do that. If you’re okay with helping.” There’s a playful scoff.

    “I’m not hearing the part where I stay all night, like they have planned.”

    “I- You can! Please don’t think you aren’t welcome! I thought you would have to work is all.” His cheeks flush crimson.

    “You’re forgiven. For now. I make sure I have the weekends off to spend time with Matthieu. If he wants that time to be with Alfred and you as well, then I’ll gladly go with him.”

    “I would do the same for Alfred.” A comfortable silence falls between them. After a moment, he remembers something. “Oh! Alfred said they planned for us to sleep together.” He lowers his voice so his son can’t hear. “They don’t realize we aren’t as carefree as them. We can discuss sleeping arrangements when you arrive. I’ll send you the address. What time should I expect you?”

    “Around five. I have something important to talk to you about as well.”

    “Alright. We will eagerly await your arrival tomorrow.”

    “Thank you. Have a wonderful rest of your day.” This makes Arthur blush even more.

~

    Francis looks back at Matthieu when he pulls up to Arthur and Alfred’s house. “You ready for your first sleepover, kiddo?” He hugs his stuffed polar bear tighter to his chest.

    “I-I think so! But my legs are all wobbly. Can you carry me in?”

    “Of course I will. Anything for my sweet little boy.” He hops out, and opens Matthieu’s door. He unbuckles him from his carseat, and picks him up. He grabs hold of his overnight bag as well, then closes the door, making sure to lock up the vehicle. He kisses Matthieu’s hair reassuringly, and walks up to the door. “Do you want to knock?”

    “Yes please!” He reaches out and taps the door. Apparently Arthur is waiting for them to arrive, because the door swings open a second later.

    “Hello, and welcome to our home.” Matthieu wiggles to be let down before they even get inside, and Francis places him down carefully.

    “Thank you very much! Alfred! Where are you!?” He runs into the house.

    “He’s usually very shy. I’m glad he’s found a friend that he feels comfortable around.” He looks at Arthur, who’s got a shocked expression on his face. “What?”

    “He and Alfred look almost exactly alike,” he whispers.

    “Oui, they do. But you know why.”

    “He’s the twin I couldn’t adopt,” his voice is louder now, though barely. Francis nods.

    “He is. I’m happy they found each other. But what are the chances we would move to the same area?” He laughs heartily. “It’s like fate wanted them together again. I’m glad.”

    “How are we going to tell them that?”

    “I’ve already told Matthieu. I hadn’t realized you didn’t tell Alfred yet.”

    “I didn’t think they looked as similar as he said. Alfred has a tendency to hyperbolize everything.” Francis snorts quietly. Arthur scoffs. “What? Did you not expect an English teacher to use that word?”

    “An English teacher, hmm? That only slightly explains your inability to cook. Alfred offered Matthieu some of the scone you made him, and he told me he feared for his life.” Arthur snaps his head around, ready to chew him out. His heart skips a beat. It’s the first time he’s looked at Francis, and he feels light headed. He’s beautiful. Shit! This isn’t good! His house guest is super fucking attractive!

    “Not all of us can be professional chefs,” he settles on, looking away again.

    “Oui, that is true. Though I can teach you, if you would like to learn?” He shouldn’t take the offer. That’s torturing himself. But he finds himself nodding. “Great! We can start tonight. After you’re done grading, of course. I’ll go watch the boys until then. Where might I find them?” Arthur steps back, and points at the door to Alfred’s room silently. He smiles at him, and walks toward it. Well shit. He’s royally fucked. ~

    “You have a stuffed polar bear?” Matthieu nods sheepishly. “Cool! Are they a comfort item? I have one of those! His name is Toni. He’s an alien!” He crawls up on his bed, and grabs Toni. “See? I sleep with him every night. Does yours have a name?” He nods once. “Nice! You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. I know it can be personal.” He shrugs, and slides back down to the floor, holding Toni close. “What do you wanna do first? Dad’s still got to grade some, but we can start on the fun! They can join later. We’ll get the ball rolling. Whatever that means. I’ve heard dad use it a few times, so I know I’m using it right!” Matthieu giggles quietly. He really likes his brother. They’re each other’s opposite. Perfect for completing each other. He wraps his arms around him, giving him a big hug. “What’s this for?”

    “To show you how much I love you.” Alfred brings his arms up to hug him back.

    “I love you too! So much. And we’re going to love each other even more, as the night continues! I can’t wait for it.” Someone opens his door, and he turns his head to it. “Oh! Hello there! You must be Matthew’s dad! You’re very pretty, you know. Prettier than most women I know!” He chuckles softly.

    “Thank you. I’m glad to see you two getting along. Matthieu, do you want to change into your night clothes?”

    “Please!” Francis smiles fondly, and hands him his overnight bag.

    “Oh! Of course! You can change in my bathroom!” Alfred points at a door inside his room. “It’s over there!” How sweet of Arthur to give him the ensuite room. Though he did the same for Matthieu. They must think similarly. He watches his son walk into the room after pulling out his clothes. “Hey! You should change into your night clothes too! Jeans are uncomfortable.” He sticks his bottom lip out in a pout.

    “I have to cook first. But I will when I’m finished, alright?”

    “Pinky promise?” He holds out his hand.

    “Pinky promise.” He kneels, and grabs Alfred’s pinky with his own. The boy grins, and throws his arms around him. “Aren’t you quite the hugger?” He laughs. “I’m glad Matthieu made friends with someone so friendly.”

    “Matthew’s great! I love him already. He loves me, too! He told me so.” He pulls away to cross his arms over his chest proudly. “But I’m sure he loves you still! Just like I love my dad still.”

    “I’m sure he does. Love isn’t a limited feeling. The more it’s needed, the more it shows up.” Alfred furrows his brows slightly.

    “Matthew and I don’t love you both any less, but we love each other more than we did. Does that mean if you and dad come to love each other, you will still love us the same you already do?” Francis feels his cheeks heat up slightly in embarrassment. He picks Alfred up and brushes his nose against his cheek.

    “That’s right. We might love you both even more by then. If that happens. I’m not going to promise it will. But it could.” Alfred’s eyes light up.

    “Then you would move in together and Matthew and I would never have to be apart! Except for at school, but everywhere else we could be together!” He gasps. “We could have sleepovers every night!” He wiggles out of Francis’ arms and runs over to Matthieu, who’s just come out of the bathroom. “We have to get our dads together! We’d be able to have a sleepover every night! We’d live in the same house! Let’s get them together, pleeeeeeeeeeeease!”

    “Daddy says love isn’t something you can force. And they’d have to be in love for that to happen.” Alfred’s bottom lip trembles, and he starts crying. “Hey! Okay! Alright! We can try. Just stop crying. Please.” He wipes at his tears. “I don’t want to see someone I love crying.” He hugs him tightly. “Just don’t be disappointed if they don’t wind up loving each other, okay?” Alfred nods, hiccuping slightly from his outburst of tears. “Shh. I’m right here. I’ll soothe you.” He glances up at his father, who’s standing in the doorway with an amused expression. “Go find Arthur, Daddy! We’ll be fine!”

    “Yeah! We’ve got to plot! Shew! Go! You can’t hear any of this!” He laughs, and leaves the room without protest. He finds Arthur, and leans against the wall next to him.

    “Just thought you should know, our sons are plotting ways to get us together currently. They want a sleepover every night.” Arthur groans quietly, but doesn’t look up from his grading.

    “It was Alfred’s idea, wasn’t it? No need to answer, I know it was. I’d hate to disappoint them. Should we just let them plot for now?” Francis raises a brow.

    “Don’t you think we should stop it before it becomes something serious?”

    “I’ve never seen him this happy. I want to enjoy it a bit more before I tell him anything.” He sighs softly. “I knew it would come back to bite me in the ass when I told him boys could love boys, and girls could love girls. And everyone in between.”

    “I wondered why he used a neutral term for Matthieu’s polar bear. Now I know. He’s got a wonderful father.” He notices Arthur’s cheeks turn red.

    “I’m only teaching him love and acceptance. That shouldn’t mean I’m a wonderful father. It should be the norm.”

    “But it isn’t. And that’s what makes you wonderful for doing it. I’m teaching Matthieu the same things.” Arthur looks up at him. “It’s relieving, knowing I can make a friend with the same views I have about that.”

    “I suppose it is. But are we friends? We aren’t their age anymore. Looking at each other doesn’t make us friends.”

    “Maybe not. But I would say trusting me to watch your child, and trusting me to be in your house, counts as friendship. I view us as friends. Don’t you?” Arthur rolls his eyes, and goes back to grading.

    “I know you wouldn’t do anything. You’ve got a child as well. We aren’t friends because we don’t know much about each other.” Francis scoffs.

    “Then let’s change that. You’re an English teacher. I’m a chef. Your name is Arthur. Mine is Francis. We both have beautiful little boys that are actually twins. That alone should be enough for us to be friends.”

    “I really must finish grading. Please, leave me be. We can speak when we cook. Feel free to sit on the couch and watch something. I have a feeling Alfred and Matthieu will come out if they hear the television going.” Not wanting to push anything, Francis does as he’s told. Arthur was right; the two boys come out less than a minute after he turns on the television, and cuddle up to him and each other.

~

    “Well, good to see you three getting along.” Arthur smiles at them. Alfred launches himself into his arms, hugging him tightly.

    “You’re finished! Yay! Can we have macaroni and cheese tonight? And chicken nuggets!”

    “Some corn, too?” Comes Matthieu’s quiet voice. Before he can respond, Francis is speaking.

    “Of course you can.” He kisses both of them on the forehead, then looks at Arthur. “But I won’t stand for boxed food. Can you watch after Matthieu for a bit? I’m going to get ingredients.” He nods slowly. “Merci!” He pulls his car keys out of his pocket, and is out the door before Arthur can comprehend what happened.

    “Ooooooh! Chef food!” Matthieu lets out a snort of laughter. It reminds both of the people with him of his father’s amused laugh.

~

    “Sorry I ran out so fast. I was inspired. Can you put on a movie for the boys? Then meet me in the kitchen!” He hurries to the room, washing his hands while he waits on Arthur. He grins at him when he comes into the room a few minutes later. “Great! Wash your hands.” He does so silently. “Do you know how to make corn on the cob?”

    “Boil some water, right?”

    “Okay. Can you get some bowls for the chicken? I’m going to bread it.”

    “What? Is that not how you make corn?” Francis smiles sweetly at him.

    “It’s better in the oven.” Arthur blushes slightly. He feels silly now. Why has he never thought of that? “It’s alright. I don’t expect you to know all of my tricks. That’s why I’m teaching you. If you knew them already, there wouldn’t be a point in doing this.” Arthur nods slowly. That makes sense! He hurries to pull out some bowls for Francis. “You can boil some water for the macaroni though. After we make the noodles.” Make the noodles!? What on Earth!

    “Are we doing everything from scratch?”

    “Absolutely.” This is going to be a long prep. “Let’s see… Noodles first. They have to rest for a bit. I can cut the chicken while that happens.” He pulls out some ingredients, and starts whisking them together. He explains exactly what he’s doing to Arthur, smiling the entire time. Once the pasta is resting, he washes his hands again, and shifts to cutting the chicken into cubed pieces. He covers them in a flour, season salt, salt, and pepper mix, dips them in egg, then in breadcrumbs. He places each one carefully on a pan, placing them in the oven when he’s finished. Arthur’s stomach knots up nervously when he leans close to him to wash his hands. “That wasn’t so hard, now was it?” He shakes his head quickly.

    “I think I can do that in the future.”

    “Good. They’re much healthier than anything store bought. And tastier. I’m sure Alfred will appreciate it.” He pulls away, and Arthur lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. “On to the pasta!” He starts folding it delicately. Arthur… tries. And very miserably fails. “Here. Like this.” He takes his hands and moves them carefully, showing him how to do it. He can feel his heart beating fast. Francis is stunning. He feels special, having him here to teach him all of this. “Try on your own?” He does, focusing hard on the dough in front of him. He actually manages to make one.

    “I did it!” He smiles brightly, laughing a bit. “I didn’t think it was possible! Thank you!” He turns to hug him, and freezes. Right. They’re not close enough for that. He goes back to making pasta, head bowed and cheeks flushed. When they’re finished, Francis places them aside, washes his hands again, and fills a pot with water to boil it. Arthur washes his hands, and starts shucking the corn. At least he can do that! Francis watches him curiously, but doesn’t comment. Hopefully that means he’s doing good? He hands them off to the man when they’re clean, and he places them on a sheet to be buttered.

    “It’s sweet corn, so it’s better to only butter them. Other types you want to prepare differently.” Arthur nods. He’s actually understanding this! “Would you like to put them in?” He carefully takes the pan, and slides them into the oven, next to the chicken nuggets. He trusts that Francis knows what he’s doing. “Now for the macaroni.” He pushes them into the boiling water, and stares intently at them. He drains them way sooner than Arthur expected. Seeing his confusion, Francis explains it to him. “Fresh pasta cooks a lot faster.”     “Ah.” He bows his head again, blushing more. He glances up just in time to see his companion adding shredded cheese and milk to the noodles. “Even the cheese has to be made like this?”

    “It’s better this way, trust me.” He bites his bottom lip, and measures out some breadcrumbs. He tosses those into the macaroni and cheese, and stirs them in. That’s… interesting. “They’re really good. I promise.” He gives him a reassuring smile, then checks on the items in the oven. He pulls out the corn, but leaves the chicken nuggets. Maybe three minutes pass before he deems them done. He turns to grin at Arthur. “Doesn’t that feel better? Oh, by the way, you’re covered in flour from the pasta.” He brushes his shirt off lightly. Fuck. His hand is warm, and gentle, and Arthur steadfastly ignores the pleasure that comes from him touching his chest.

    “I should probably go change. You should, too.” He gives him a polite, slightly concerned smile. “You must be hot in that. I don’t know how you cook with sleeves.”

    “I guess I’m used to it. But oui, I’ll change too. Then we can all eat!”

~     Did Arthur already mention he’s royally fucked? Because he is. He’s been staring at Francis for the past two and a half hours. He only knows it’s been that long because that’s the length of the movie that just ended. He didn’t watch a second of it. “I’m glad we were able to tell the boys they’re actually twins. I think they took it well. Don’t you?” He looks at the two between them. They’re snuggled up to each other, asleep. Matthieu is beside Francis, and Alfred is beside him.

    “I think they’re happy to have each other in any way. Being brothers just makes it better.” Francis nods thoughtfully.

    “I’ve been thinking a lot about their plan to get us together.” Not this. Anything but this. “I don’t think we should ruin their fun.”

    “We have to. We can’t let them think there’s a possibility of moving in together sometime soon.” Francis looks him dead in the eyes.

    “Who’s to say there isn’t a possibility? I know you’ve been staring at me. For the entire length of the movie. Do you even know what we just watched?” His face turns crimson, and he jerks his head to the side. “I thought so. Don’t worry though.” He carefully reaches over the boys to grab Arthur’s hand and squeeze, causing him to look at him again. “The only reason I know you’ve been staring at me is because I’ve been staring at you. More discreetly, of course, but I have. You’re cute. And I love your eagerness to learn. I hope that exists in every category.” He winks at him, then runs his tongue along his teeth. Arthur shudders at the implications.

    “I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he huffs out indignantly. Francis raises a brow at him. It’s a challenge. Are you sure this is the route you want to take? It is. “Besides, I’m only eager to learn because there’s so much I don’t know yet.”

    “I can teach you something right now, if you want.” He squeezes his hand again. “I know I want to.” He licks his lips.

    “That depends on what it is. And where our relationship stands if it’s what I think it is.”

    “It’s definitely not as bad as what you’re thinking it is. But I won’t do it if you aren’t willing. As for our relationship… Will you be my boyfriend?” There’s the word. That darn word that has Arthur’s face practically on fire from the embarrassment! He nods, feeling too shy to say anything. “Good. Now I want to teach you something.” He releases his hand, and carefully stands, making sure not to wake the boys. He picks Arthur up, still being cautious. “Where’s your room?”

This is your stopping point if you’re not reading the blowjob part

    “U-upstairs. First door on the right.” He clings to Francis tightly, stomach twisting nervously. He makes his way to the room, and sets Arthur down on the bed. To his relief, he doesn’t get over him. Instead, he kneels by the bed after locking the door. “Oh! You want to do that!” He covers his face. Wearing sweatpants wasn’t the best idea. It’s super easy to tell he’s horny.

    “Only if you’re okay with it.” He nods nervously.

    “I am.” Francis grabs both of his thighs from behind and squeezes reassuringly.

    “I promise to be gentle.” He presses a heated kiss to his bulge. Shit that feels good! It’s been too long since someone else touched him. He lets out a quiet whine.

    “More. Please.”

    “Non, not until you’re completely hard.” He kisses it again. Arthur’s breath hitches, and he tilts his head back. “You’re very sensitive. This will be fun.” He tightens his grip on his thighs, and sucks lightly. Arthur squirms a bit. This will be really fun. “Try not to wake Alfred and Matthieu,” he mumbles before tugging at his pants. He lifts his hips up, letting him slip them off easily. He can’t help but smile when he sees his underwear. “Superman.”

    “Shush. Alfred picked them out. He wanted me to know I’m his hero. Now continue. Please.” Francis nods, and sucks on his bulge again. He jerks slightly, letting out a faint squeak. He breathes out through his mouth to tease him, and is surprised to feel hands in his hair.

    “That’s how you want to play?” Arthur nods. Francis smirks, and bites down lightly on the fabric. His hair gets tugged on, and Arthur jolts slightly.

    “Fuck,” he breathes out. He reaches for his pillow, and brings it to his mouth so he can bite down on it. He’s not going to be able to keep himself silent. Francis bites down again, and he moans heartily into the fabric. His erection is already nearly as hard as it can be. “You’re good with your mouth,” he mumbles into the pillow.

    “I know I am~” He nips at it lightly, then tugs on his underwear. Arthur lifts himself up, letting him take them. He presses a kiss to the head with a smirk. “Beautiful,” he whispers before taking all of it into his mouth. Arthur is definitely going to take advantage of him seemingly not having a gag reflex. He bucks his hips, reveling in the quiet noise of surprise Francis makes. He pulls on his hair, guiding him up his shaft a bit. He pulls away from his pillow to talk.

    “It’s really hard to resist doing what I want, so I’m going to ask if it’s okay. I won’t do it if you say no, but I really want to fuck your mouth. Can I?” Francis’ eyes widen slightly. Arthur smirks, knowing that’s not what he expected. “What? I like being in control~” He watches the man shudder, then nod. Immediately, he starts moving his hips. Slowly at first, then a bit faster. Francis tightens his jaw slightly, causing him to drag his teeth along the top. Arthur shoves his pillow back in his mouth and moans loudly. He tries to make eye contact, but he tightens his jaw again. Arthur tosses his head back in pleasure as his teeth rake along the top and bottom. Francis brings a hand up, running it along his thigh. He pauses to fondle him for a moment, then continues back more. He pushes one finger into Arthur, and he screams into the pillow. He’s close! And coming undone.

    He tugs harder on his hair, now guiding his head back and forth, in time with his hip thrusts. “Oh God!” it’s loud enough to hear through the pillow. He lets himself enjoy it for a few more moments, before deciding he’s too close to tempt fate. He releases Francis’ hair and scoots back, but he comes with. “You want me to…?” He nods. Arthur flushes crimson, but grabs his hair again. He gives a few smaller thrusts, then a big one that pulls a scream-moan from his lips and lets him reach his release. He rides it out, thrusting a few more times, before releasing Francis’ hair for the night. He feels the finger slip out of him and shudders. They both pant heavily, not looking at each other. Just as he parts his lips to ask Francis if he wants the same done to him, he moans loudly, trembling with pleasure. “Did you just…?”

    “Masturbate while I was sucking you off and finish while I was swallowing down your release? Yes.” Arthur shoves his face into the pillow, completely embarrassed. He peeks out when he feels a hand on his shoulder. “I’m going to clean up a bit. Then we should put the boys to bed. Can we sleep together tonight?”

    “You don’t need to ask,” he mumbles out shyly. He hugs the pillow to his chest, and sticks his tongue out at Francis. “I want you to sleep with me.” He smiles brightly. “And I’m happy to report you taught me some very valuable information that I will be using in the future. Hopefully the near future.” He winks at him. “Oh, and the bathroom is across the hall. Towels are in the linen closet.” He blows him a kiss as he opens the door. “Have fun, sexy.” His ears turn red and he leaves the room quickly. Arthur stands, stretching himself out. He’s not got any mess to clean up, so he pulls his clothes back on and wanders out into the hall. He meets up with Francis, who kisses him deeply. He doesn’t even mind not knowing if he brushed his teeth or not.

    “Let’s put those two to bed and make out until we fall asleep.”

    “That sounds wonderful.”

[trulymadlysydney]

HI BESTIE ITS ME! I DONT WANNA SPOIL THIS FOR YOU ACCIDENTALLY SO DONT READ ON UNTIL YOUVE WATCHED!

I AM SO UPSET! JEREMY OVER JAVONNY AND WES?? LIKE ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? THEY HAD ONE JOB AND THEY FUCKED IT UP! THAT WAS THE ONE GUY WE ALL WANTED TO GO HOME AND THEY MESSED UP SO UNBELIEVABLY BAD! JAVONNY DIDNT EVEN HAVE THE CHANCE TO FIND SOMEONE BC OF OLIVIA STRINGING HIM ALONG FOR 3 WEEKS! GOD HOW COULD THEY DO THAT TO HIM?

AND PICKING OLIVIA OVER AIMEE? REALLY? WHAT WAS THE THOUGHT PROCESS BEHIND THAT? AND DID YOU HEAR CASH TELL OLIVIA THE GUYS SAID IT WAS BETWEEN FLORITA AND OLIVIA? LIKE WHAT THE HELL WERE THEY THINKING? AIMEE DESERVED TO BE THERE MORE THAN THOSE OTHER TWO! OLIVIA IS SO BLAND AND EVERYTHING WEVE SEEN OF HER MAKES ME SO ANNOYED! I DONT LIKE HER! GET HER OFF THE ISLAND NOW!

Okay I think I’m done with caps now lmao. But dude I am so mad and I will admit I teared up when they were saying goodbye to javonny. He deserved so much better than what he got. And the fact that they played falling right after they were all dumped?? A bitch was crying. And it was sweet that will made Jeremy a sandwich to make him feel better but fuck Jeremy oh my god I hate him so much. Everytime Jeremy or Olivia would talk I would say shut up and maybe that’s petty but come on! Why are they still there? The islanders are not on the same page as the viewers and I hate it so much.

And now I feel like the show is so boring with javonny. I could barely pay attention to tonight’s episode bc I was so mad and all the people who are left don’t have half the personality javonny does. That man was literally carrying the entire show on his shoulders huh.

Everything is just the same shit isn’t it? Cash and Trina and cinco every episode… I am TIRED. Cash is starting to look borderline desperate legit begging cinco to be with her. I feel like we talk about this everyday bc that’s literally all that they show. And honestly the more the show of it the more I don’t like cash. She needs to move tf on and her and Olivia together being painted as girls who are second choice irritates me. Like they keep playing victim but they go for guys who don’t want them! What do you expect? I cannot stand them anymore. God I’m so salty rn. I hate everyone in that villa😂

Okay last thing! There may be a chance for javonny and Aimee! In like the third uk season of love island towards the end they let the public vote for two islanders to return and they included two people who were previously kicked out and they came back! So maybe that’ll happen this season too! They’d be kinda dumb not to bc javonny is a fan favorite and twitter is so mad that Jeremy and Olivia were saved. I guess one good thing that came out of it is that Wes and Aimee made it seem like they were gonna stay together after the villa and I hope to god they work out even if it’s just for a little. They deserved a chance the two hottest people in the villa… my king and queen I miss them :( -E

OKAY FINALLY WATCHED IT BESTIE LETS DISCUSS

I LITERALLY!! CRIED AT JAVONNY LEAVING LIKE HIS LITTLE GOODBYE WITH OLIVIA? "I'm gonna dance with you in the rain one last time" or whatever he said oh my god I was legit in tears. I CANNOT BELIEVE THEY PICKED JEREMY LIKE WHAT? OVER JAVONNY? Luckily everything I've seen on social media about it (because I had the episode spoiled for me when I opened insta rip) is showing that like, everyone is as upset about it as we are. Jeremy needs to go. I AGREE ABOUT OLIVIA LIKE!!! YALL SHOULD HAVE GIVEN AIMEE A CHANCE! Olivia had her chance and BLEW IT FOR THREE WHOLE WEEKS LIKE GET HER OUT OF THERE.

LIKE HOW DID IT COME DOWN TO OLIVIA AND FLORITA?! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!??! Olivia is boring and Florita is a whole SNAKE like AIMEE WAS GENUINE AND, LETS BE REAL HERE, SHE WAS THE HOTTEST GIRL IN THE ENTIRE VILLA PERIOD.

Will making Jeremy a sandwich was the cutest shit I've ever seen like when I tell you I am so in love and obsessed with Will lmao he's so cute 🥺. It's so crazy though, like they really are NOT on the same page as we are and like, yes that kind of goes to show how much they manipulate the show but it's also like.... I feel like these islanders love drama. (I agree though. Javonny carried.)

I'm so glad you're saying that because I didn't want to say it but like... I'm getting real tired of miss Cash lmao. "I can't just not go for it because of the love and respect I have for Trina" like why not? Also WHAT love and respect like ???? where? And like, on the one hand it's like "well Trina is getting exactly what she deserves because this is exactly what she did to Cash" but like Cash literally looks desperate the way she like... clings to Cinco (physically and emotionally) like I'm over it. Move on. Cinco is a fool lmao

OH SHIT THAT WOULD BE AMAZING IF THEY COULD COME BACK. I hopeeee they do because they literally deserve it. ALTHOUGH, something I've seen people mentioning is that Javonny needs to go for Cely from season 2, and HOLY SHIT I want nothing more than for that to happen. Like can you imagine? THE POWER THEY WOULD HOLD? THE FUNNIEST COUPLE ALIVE AND YOU KNOOOOW HE WOULD TREAT HER LIKE THE FUCKIN QUEEN SHE IS. I NEED THEM TO MAKE THIS HAPPEN.