#dusk does a text post
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smokeydusk ¡ 2 years ago
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Butches in unbuttoned shirts showing happy trail, you agree. Reblog.
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~{Heyyyy, So I got reminded of an Old post of mine by one of you gremlins so you all get to deal with my bullshit now :) }~
•Everlasting Sirens•
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~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
When the Lantern Core connected the JL they were expecting a fight some even started to mentally prepare themselves for a battle with the newest enemy’s.
But as they were told the reason they were all pleasantly surprised, apparently a old planet that was code named “Ocean Wasteland” by the LC because of its surface where there is only one piece of land and it’s about the size of a small park is the best thing to compare it too and this planet was mostly forgotten about.
Until the LC got a reading of intelligent life on the planet and they want to send the JL to go check it out, and the JL agrees.
So now the JL [Superman, Wonder Woman, Batman, Green lantern, Flash, Martian Manhunter, Aquaman] were now in a submarine in the middle of a alien sea looking for anything with intelligence and it was not going anywhere.
They had been looking for about three hours now and have seen nothing but the fish of the planet but that was until they went over a very large rock formation that was mostly dark due to the placement.
Than they heard a loud shrill cry and a loud garbled scream that was the only warning before the submarine started to get hit around like a game of volleyball as this was happening the cry’s and screams continued, disorienting the JL and with how whatever was hitting them back and forth was damaging the sides it was only a matter of time before it started to break.
So the JL needed to do something about this fast but before they could do anything the muted sound of rocks being dropped to the sandy sea floor and the hitting stopped that’s when Batman gets up from where he and the rest of the JL have been thrown to the floor of the submarine and straighten the submarine out and when he does.
They find out what was hitting them. A purple and black eel like woman with a red and gold octopus like man who are now looking and hovering around a person with a long flowy black tail and mid-length white hair looking severely annoyed at the two other Alien-Mers while one of their hand stay on their…. stomach.
Oh
OH
They too close to the pregnant one!ďżź
~{I’ll probably redo this part when I have the energy}~
-•—••••••••••••••••—•-
•Background•
When Danny took in Dans and Danis or well Dusk and Dawn as they have been renamed cores. He with Jazz, Sam and Tucker knew that Danny couldn’t hide that he was a Halfa anymore, while Maddie and Jack may be neglectful and forget about the fact they even had kids sometimes they weren’t stupid.
So the four of them made a plan, Danny and Jazz would sit their parents down and tell them everything if they reacted well they would send Sam and Tucker a text that said everything went well if they reacted badly Danny and Jazz would book it out of the house and to the bus station where Sam and Tucker would be with Go-Bags and skip town [To the Ghost Zone or Any other place whatever was safer].
But when Jazz and Danny didn’t send the signal or text, Sam and Tucker got nervous and started to walk up to the window in the room where the talk would be happening and what they saw would haunt them.
They saw Jazz on the Floor with the hole in her side still smoking and bleeding from her head and Danny with the Fentons gone and blood on the walls, Sam kicked in the back door and checked on Jazz who was breathing but not much and she was only able to say that the Fentons gave Danny to the GIW before taking her last breath.
Sam and Tucker buried her near the lake. It was one of her favorite places to hang out with them and far enough from town to be left alone, after paying their respects and giving her a proper burial they started on tracking down their love.
They had finally found Danny, They had broken into the G.I.W base farthest from town by sneaking in without anyone seeing them Does it count as seeing if they don’t live long enough to do anything with it? And search for Danny.
After about 4 minutes they find him. Danny their Love, their sweet boyfriend adores space and would gush about feeling their children’s feelings was strapped down to a metal table with three an around him cutting him open and they were trying to take their children’s cores out of him.
Sam and Tucker left that room covered in blood and gore with Danny in Sam’s arms. As they stood in the doorway checking on Danny a loud alarm went off and they could hear heavy running steps down the hall and approaching fast. And with Danny being in worst shape then they thought it would be impossible to get out.
Suddenly a green portal with purple around the edges appears in front of them and they run through as they recognize immediately who it is and they end up in clockworks tower and as the portal closes behind them some blob ghost that Clockwork likes to keep around to do small things start to bandage up Danny.
As the Blobs do that, Clockwork starts talking saying how they can never return to their world as if they do the G.I.W will just keep on going after them until they are caught or have no choice but they can’t stay in the Ghost Zone as even if Danny would have little problem staying with the need for vitamins but Sam and Tucker aren’t Ghosts yet so they can’t stay. But Clockwork has a place where could stay, it’s a planet far from any place that could hurt them and Clockwork can give them forms that help them adapt to the new location and keep each other and their children safe.
Sam and Tucker agreed.
-•—••••••••••••••••—•-
•Little Facts•
•Sam and Tucker will find a way to drop kick anyone who gets to close to the den or Danny even in Siren form.
•When Ghost/Ghost adjacent people change to a more animalistic form they gain some of the instincts and behaviors of said animal 
•The trio sleep for most of the “Daytime” and do what they want at night, they basically become nocturnal.
•Ah yes some good old gender fuckery on Danny’s part
•Dani and Dan will be renamed Dawn and Dusk
•Sam and Tucker wanted to be in the room where Danny and Jazz told the Fentons everything but Jazz reasoned that they would have to GO if the Fentons reacted badly and already having Danny and Jazz in their was a slowing point so it was better for them too wait outside….Oh how Sam and Tucker regrets not fighting harder with her.
•Sam: Tucker=“Hun” Danny “Love”
Tucker: Sam “Azizi” Danny “Habibi”
Danny: Sam “Moonbeam” Tucker “Sunbeam”
•Sam and Tucker have a body count now :)
-•—••••••••••••••••—•-
•Appearances•
The top half and the animal tail.
Danny’s appearance
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The fabric is white and a greenish black
Sam’s appearance
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The fabric is black and purple
Tuckers appearance
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The fabric is red and gold
(I don’t really love the picks but it’s the best I could do so feel free to pick new one if you feel like it)
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
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~{And that’s it! From how it’s written you can tell what I wrote first lol, but sorry if the story bits are weird I am running on caffeine and the will to fight god and I’m going to go to sleep, hope you gremlins liked it Byeeeeeee}~
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gloomskulls ¡ 3 months ago
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⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ THE VISIT [caracalla x reader]
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pairing(s): gladiatorii!caracalla x reader
⇢ ˗ˏˋ SUMMARY ୨୧ Caracalla introduces you to his beloved Dondus.
⇢ ˗ˏˋ WARNINGS ୨୧ mentions of blood and violence (coz of gladiator games and stuff
This is so rushed, base on this ask. This has been actually sitting on my drafts for awhile, I never posted it coz I didn't get the time to edit the texts and the gif lol (I still haven't actually done any of that). Will probably edit this to make it look aesthetic pleasing
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The roar of the crowd had died down in the Colosseum, but the blood and dust scent remained. Whatever it was, Caracalla had invited you to his private quarters, but you knew not to ask too many questions of him. He was famous for his tempers, even more so than for his conquests. Favour is a privilege; disfavor means a death wish.
Still, with all the dangers that accompanied his presence, there was something weirdly interesting about him. Perhaps the manner in which he carried himself—not only as an emperor. Perhaps, though, it was the way he regarded you, as if he were constantly debating whether or not to consider you an amusement or something more.
"You are fortunate," said Caracalla, leading you through a lavishly decorated lounge draped in deep reds and gold, "Dondus does not take to just any one."
"Dondus?" You suspected there would be a warrior or an advisor, but Caracalla merely smirked and turned toward a silk-draped perch in the corner of the room.
A stiff snap of his fingers brought forth a little creature from the dusk shadows. A dark-furred monkey, not much larger than a child's hand, scurried over the silk and jumped onto the outstretched arm of the emperor. The move was sharp accurate like a soldier receiving orders.
"This," Caracalla said, his voice infused with a curiosity almost rare in an emperor, "is Dondus."
You had heard whispers about the emperor's pet, but assuming they were just one more bit of weird rumor circulating in the capital, you paid them no heed. Caracalla, the ruthless ruler, with a tiny monkey clutched in his palm? The very thought seemed crazy—until now.
Dondus tilted his head, dark intelligent eyes fastened on you with the same sharp scrutiny as his master often gave you.
"He's adorable," you said, and it was for the first time that Caracalla looked genuinely pleased.
Making a curious noise, Dondus jumped up—carried over Caracalla's arm, leaped onto your shoulder, and curled up comfortably against your neck. His small fingers tugged at the fabric of your tunic, as though testing your worthiness.
You stiffened for a moment expecting Caracalla to remove this monkey or, worse even, on top of that take offense. Instead, though, he witnessed a rather strange expression taking over the emperor's face. For just a split-second, his smirk faltered and was replaced with a look of awe.
"I suppose he approves," he said, arms folding across his chest.
A slow smile twitched on your lips. "Should I be honored?"
He huffed a quiet laugh, almost rare and unexpected. "Perhaps. He is more selective than most of my council."
Dondus chirped with a pleased little noise and tangles his tail around your neck, lounging like he'd known you forever. The monkey actually having fun with you seemed to amuse Caracalla more than such passion deserved.
"You are enjoying this," you commented.
"It is a bit... interesting", he said, glancing at you with his eyes darkly unreadable.
You were unable to miss how he looked at you now, not as a ruler scrutinizing a subject, but a man watching the most uncommon of rare finds.
"Perhaps you should visit more often," he mused almost too casually.
Your breath just caught for a second; that sounded dangerously close to an invitation, one that promised more than just an audience with the emperor.
Dondus chirped again, obviously in agreement, and Caracalla smirked.
Yes, you realized—this is a test. Not only Dondus's approval, but something else entirely. And for the first time, you wondered if you had truly made an impression on the most dangerous man in Rome.
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@gloomskulls 2024. DON'T COPY, TRANSLATE OR USE ANY OF MY WORKS HERE OR ANY OTHER WEBSITES. Photos don't belong to me
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hirayaea ¡ 1 year ago
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all the times xavier knew what he was doing (a series)
—part 2
—a masterclass in being sly to get the girl you want
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[ Part 1 ] [ Part 2 ]
note: sorry I took so long with part 2, real life ate me up
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tender moments - warm wishes
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hmmm and you just happened to be there at exactly the same time? ok seiya
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if any of you have been to a festival the mood of this card just screams DATE, cause who else would you buy festival food with and split everything in half with but your SO?! we all know this. xavier knows this.
normal friends would be like “I’ll buy this, you’ll buy that, let’s meet in 15? oh maybe can share 1-2 food items” but no this man is “we’re eating everything together right?”
the intimacy of eating from the same plates… saying “no, it’s okay, you take the last piece!” laughing and saying together, “omg it’s really good right?!” blushing when he attempts to feed you… ok none of this happened but you can see the potential, I’m sure xavier saw it too
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suuure you didn’t notice. but the next moment he chooses to read:
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mc!!! he was reading about himself and just fishing, all you had to do was say yes
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tender moments - a captured moment
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earlier in this card MC was complaining that he was too aloof, and to be fair, he did kind of brush her off when he received the cookies. I have a theory its cause he was embarrassed about remembering seeing her skin when her clothes tore a little during battle... but this is not about seiya being embarrassed, this is about him being sly
and he's definitely being sly here because why else would you take a picture of an empty cookie jar if not for proof later on to the girl you like that you ate all of her homemade cookies
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tender moments - dawn to dusk
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ohhh this card, this card. seiya arrives in a backpack and later on you find out that the guide he read was a DATE GUIDE, and the first line literally says "bring a backpack so she can travel light". my man tries to brush it off when MC points it out that it's a travel guide for couples but ahem, ok seiya, nice try, we know this was on purpose. the rest of the card plays very boyfriend when he basically holds the bus ticket for her and does everything she wants
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xavier likes pointing out MC is blushing (this happens in several cards, watch me point it out always) and my girl is also cute here for denying it, but as the point of this post, xavier knows what he's doing... and he knows he's baiting MC but its ok, we're not cowards!!! MC, FIGHT FLIRT RIGHT BACK!!!
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tender moments - an appointment
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oh mc was so caught here he knows she was starin' at him...
I bet he texted Jeremiah right after and was like. "she was staring at me today :)". Jeremiah was probably like, "good 4 u :)" or "??? who?" because he's a bestie like that and besties exist to support you and piss you off at the same time
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note: as always, more to come soon
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pureshadough ¡ 1 month ago
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crk reread - crispia 7-8
I got so excited about this section that I immediately went against my word from the last post about doing three chapters per-post because I straight up ran out of images while talking about the Forgotten Academy section in isolation. So. Um. (long post under the cut)
the map design in general for the yogurt academy is absolutely fucking gorgeous. this is where the locations in this game Really start to stand out to me i think. i wish we had more kingdom decor that directly matched this kind of dusk-lit aesthetic cuz i would absolutely cover mine in that shit
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HMMM DONT SOME OF THESE AESTHETICS LOOK FAMILIAR (stairs in the back)
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i love the ferryman. this guy was my icon in game for Years just because his design was so remarkably different and silly. Why are there dessert creatures made of bone on Earthbread. No idea. Doesn't matter. He's just a little guy.
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fghjkhfsuidhsfiudhsdfdg???????
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LMAO CUSTARD
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devsis was fucking DIABOLICAL for this one because by all accounts these sentences aren't Wrong, But,
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Oh my god theyre sofuckgin cute i huHRGSGDFsdGDGDSFSSJHDfG
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pure vanilla's manner of speaking here is REALLY different in a way that fascinates me. really goes to show just how carefree he was as a teen prior to the Virtues snatching up the two of them. i wonder how much of this attitude & behavior was informed by him being a shepherd who lived largely in isolation prior to being an academic. the honest heart and optimism was always there but this farm boy had ZERO manners about it. very funny.
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lily's complete lack of self confidence has always made me SO SAD. girl couldn't even stand the nature of her own ingredients... 🙁
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[visibly shaking] We are not talking about design parallels right now we are not talking about aesthetic parallels right now we are not talking abou
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is crumbs the equivalent of saying shit here because if so My god this kid really has zero filter
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what if we committed atrocities against nature together and we were both cookies 😳
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(glances nervously over my shoulder at the eluded-to antagonist figure made by Dark Enchantress who has currently only been referred to in text as The Ultimate Cookie) R. Right. Okay
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[VISIBLY SHAKING] WE ARE NOT TALKIGN ABOUT DESIGN PARALLELS RIGHT NO
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The discussion of the academy willfully hiding The Truth from its student body about the nature of cookie kind is so. It's so. [clenches fists] I SIMPLY THINK IT IS VERY INTERESTING.
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bro fucking jumpscared me why does he appear at the end of this random unvoiced cutscene without warning 💀
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this being the first time since the prologue we see him with his eyes open is CRAZY by the way
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these two are REALLY fucking funny together. dark choco in general is just incredibly silly as far as introductions go. bro literally just walks up and clutches his evil eye before getting kicked over by 5 children. gingerbrave listens to him prose about his cursed sword and how he doesnt believe in friendship for 2 entire minutes and promptyl goes "Yeah dude seems alright" as soon as he leaves. Incredible. No notes
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OH GOD HERE IT IS.
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"The first headmaster taught the Cookies how to use magic". NOT THE STUDENTS. THE COOKIES. COOKIEKIND. the first headmaster, a mystery figure older than the ancients who's broadly known for his aesthetic association with milk products, blueberries, eye symbolism, and the moon, is basically described in PLAIN TEXT to be the PROGENITOR of magic PERIOD in this sentence. Do I even have to say anything else.
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So that all being said this portal is 100% just a hole into the Other-realm. Right. regardless of the What, i'm more or less completely convinced that during her attempt to steal the first headmaster's soul she crossed paths in some nonzero capacity with shadow milk AGES before she ended up in the silver kingdom. maybe she didn't even do anything precisely wrong herself with this procedure? Crazy as it is on paper its like. Just by trying to reach the headmaster (the fount) (shadow milk) she let The Clown take a peek outside and go "Oh, ew, it's my old fucking school" and bro just decided to wreck the place and the people in it for fun with her as the scapegoat. GOD. GOD!!!!! The fact that all of this is almost certainly a retroactive association is CRAZY and if there's somehow a world in which this ISN'T part of shadow milk's background I am going to be FLOORED. This is straight up too good of a setup to not be the case.
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in which lily tells a bunch of 8-14 year olds to literally kill her
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Hey queen 😘
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oh i forgot this is what originally lead into the red velvet dragon guild fight. huh! there ya go!
Dear god I had way more I wanted to yap about for this one than I thought I would that I had to actively debate what screenshots to share. There is just SO MUCH happening with these two chapters in ways that are becoming only More Relevant as time goes on. Next on the table we at last meet transgender jesus cookie in the flesh. High likelihood I will have just as much to talk about there but we'll see
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thelordofologies ¡ 2 months ago
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Rosy maple moth - Dryocampa rubicunda
Another info-post and again on moths, the hyperfixation is insane ! Eitherwayyy, this one is on the rosy maple moth, which is obviously slaying the pastel aesthetic <3
Tagging my beloved mutuals : @zick-the-fairy @hispaatra
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Description and life cycle
Female rosy maple moths lay their fertilized eggs on the underside of the host leaf and then depart. After two weeks, the larvae hatch.
Rosy maple moth caterpillars, also known as green-striped mapleworms, have different coloration depending on their stage of development. Early stage larvae have black heads and bodies that are yellowish-cream with faint longitudinal green stripes. Fully-grown caterpillars have beige to bright red heads. Their bodies are yellow-green with seven dark green lines running lengthwise. The longitudinal line coloration can also range from frosty blue to blue green, or black. Prominent black horns are located dorsally on the second thoracic segment. Two rows of short spines run along each side of the body and the terminal abdominal segments have four larger spines.
Adult rosy maple moths are extremely variable in color. The hirsute body of rosy maple moths varies in color from bright yellow with dark pink maculation, to cream, to unmarked white. Their ventral side, legs, and antennae are usually rose pink. Upper wing color is also very variable; ranging from yellow to cream, to white with pink at the margins and bases of the wing. Polymorphism does occur within different geographic regions. Unique to Missouri, subspecies alba is either all white or white with very faint pink maculation.
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Sighting of Dryocampa rubicunda alba
Sexual dimorphism is present in wing shape and span of rosy maple moths. Males have slightly narrower wings compared to females, and also have less rounded hindwings. Ornamentation differences are also present. Males have bipectinate antennae, while females have simple antennae. The average wingspan of both males and females is about 32 to 55 millimetres. The last instar ranges from 38 to 55 millimetres in length.
Behaviour
Rosy maple moths are nocturnal and mainly solitary except during mating. Adults enter a stage of lethargy during the morning and afternoon. They come out in the late afternoon and mate in the late evening. At night, females emit pheromones to attract males. Females lay eggs at dusk the day after mating. Early rosy maple moth larvae feed together but are not considered to feed in colonies. The larvae become solitary feeders as they develop into late-stage caterpillars. Fully-grown caterpillars use the winter to pupate in shallow holes underground.
Distribution and habitat
Rosy maple moths are native to North America. The northern extent of their range is in southern Canada. They range down the East Coast of the United States through most of Florida. Their range extends west to Michigan, Indiana, Texas, Kansas, and Nebraska.
Rosy maple moths inhabit temperate deciduous forests of eastern North America. They are most often associated with red maples (Acer rubrum), sugar maples (Acer saccharum), silver maples (Acer saccharinum), turkey oaks (Quercus laevis) and box elder maples (Acer negundo). Depending on where their host trees are, rosy maple moths have also been found in suburban areas.
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Image sources:
1.
https://www.ourbreathingplanet.com/rosy-maple-moth/
2.
https://www.inaturalist.org/observations/53829678
3.
https://www.inaturalist.org/observations/235791219
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Text references:
1.
https://animaldiversity.org/accounts/Dryocampa_rubicunda/
2.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dryocampa_rubicunda
3.
https://www.inaturalist.org/taxa/48094-Dryocampa-rubicunda
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magicshopaholic ¡ 1 year ago
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Moving On (Namjoon x OC)
Summary: BTS performs in Amsterdam and Namjoon invites you to the afterparty.
Pairing: Namjoon x OC
Genre: Angst, smut
Word count: 8.2K
Rating: 18+
Warnings: language, angst, sex, nudity, making out, fingering, cumming, arguing,
A/N: Takes place a little over a month after Final Destination.
Tagging: @bbl32, @quarter-life-crisis2,  @margopinkerton, @faearchives,  @whoisbts, @purpleseoul7, @sumzysworld, @kflixnet (if you want to be added to the taglist, lmk)
Listen to: "where does the good go" by tegan and sara
namjoon masterlist | main masterlist
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Joon [13:45] Did you get the email from Big Hit?
Kaya [13:50] Yes
Joon [13:51] The number at the end is their London office. They’ve been briefed already and have additional security available for all European locations.
Kaya [13:54] Okay
There’s a break in the chat here. Kaya stares at the time stamp, trying to picture him scrambling to find something else to say.
Joon [14:15] The company managed to track down the account that uploaded the video. Account has been taken down and they’ve sued for invasion of privacy.
Kaya [14:20] Okay 
Joon [14:22] They’ve also offered to add damages to the suit, in case we want that. Do you?
Kaya [14:25] Not really
Joon [14:26] Okay then
Another break. Kaya scans the time stamps again, even though she’s memorised it by now. She remembers the three dots indicating him typing, seeing them appear and disappear over and over again. 
Joon [14:40] How are you?
Kaya [14:45] Fine
Joon [14:46] How‘s work?
Kaya [14:48] Fine
Joon [14:50] Kaya I’m trying
Kaya [14:51] Class starting, got to go
He hadn’t responded and she hadn’t expected him to. Four days post break-up hadn’t been nearly long enough for her to let go of her anger but now, four weeks in, it’s only been replaced with an equal amount of sadness and longing.
Every conversation has been exactly this terse and abrupt, the last one being a week ago. It had appeared when she’d been teaching an elective class and it had taken every ounce of her will to not check it until the class ended. As it turned out, she couldn’t even think of a decent response to it.
“How can he possibly think of asking me this?” Kaya mutters, earphones in as she walks home. It’s dusk, a gorgeous time of the day, but she holds no appreciation for it right now.
“Wouldn’t it be worse if he didn’t ask?” Dilara asks reasonably. She’s in her car by the sound of it, a low hum audible of whichever fancy car of hers she’s decided to take out today.
Kaya swallows, pondering this. It might be, but it doesn’t address the problem she’s too embarrassed to voice out loud: it should be harder for him to ask. The thought that he might not be taking this break-up as hard as she is kills something inside of her, as if she’d misunderstood everything in the last three years. 
Her strategy to save herself from hearing the truth had been to distance herself from everyone, including Yoongi, who had texted her out of the blue one day to ask her if she was okay (she hadn’t responded); Seokjin, who seemed to skirt the topic altogether and sounded as though he was speaking to someone very sick; and especially Dilara, who Kaya knew would be the only one with the capacity to ask insightful questions that she herself was too afraid to.
“It’s just… strange,” is all she can manage. “He hopped on a flight, shot a few emails, came over and broke up with me and then went right back to his schedule, all in one day. And now he's inviting me to a party?"
“After-party, so it won’t be, like… crazy,” Dilara clarifies. “And the concert before it.” 
“I’m definitely not going to his concert.”
“Of course not,” she agrees breezily. “I wouldn’t expect you to. But the party… I mean, it’s a good thing, isn’t it? He doesn’t want you to be strangers.”
Kaya slows down as she approaches the river. She’s taken the long route home today - anything to prolong the commute before another night in her tainted apartment with memories on every surface.
“I don’t know if I want to see him.” I don’t know if I can. “He wants to see me, though, apparently,” she states after a moment.
Dilara doesn’t say anything for a few seconds. “I mean -“ She begins before pausing, then trying again. “I’m sure it’s going to be torture for him to see you. But even that’s better than not seeing you.”
Kaya doesn’t even realise she’d been holding her breath; she exhales as slowly as possible so as to not make a sound, both at Dilara’s words as well as her answering the unasked question.
She doesn’t respond immediately, though. Now that they’re down this route of addressing concerns she’s been harbouring in her heart for weeks, Kaya feels the rest of them on the verge of tumbling out of her mouth.
"You've seen him a bit these last couple of months,” she ventures, lowering her voice and leaning backwards against the railing overlooking the river. “Does it seem like he misses me at all?"
Dilara hums, a little too knowingly for Kaya’s liking. “Of course, he does. He’s not the most expressive when it comes to his feelings but aside from Tae last year, I don't think I've met a more miserable person."
Kaya waits for the swell of happiness or relief at this news, but all it brings with it is a new wave of anger and frustration.
“Thanks.”
"Look, speaking from experience, it's not easy seeing your ex after a difficult break-up,” says Dilara, sighing. “But sometimes you don't realise just how much you needed to see them until you see them, even if it's just to gain some closure."
Closure. It sounds… final. Kaya can’t picture it, being virtual strangers eventually, just bits of each other’s past. Ex-boyfriend, girl of his dreams, the one that got away. She hates all those words because they just don’t apply, not really. They can’t.
She closes her eyes and presses the heel of her palms into them to intercept the wetness forming, not caring that Dilara is still on the other end of the line. She and Namjoon had stood right here, years ago, living in the bliss of a new couple in fresh love. He’d brought her a bunch of tiny yellow flowers from the park, part-cheesy and part-genuine, eyes twinkling and dimples soft.
Kaya squeezes her eyes shut at the memory, terrified at how the edges of it are already blurring. 
“I don’t think I’ll go,” she murmurs, opening her eyes to stare at the ground. “I can’t.” 
“Are you sure?” Dilara sounds slightly surprised.
“Yeah. Two days from now is… it’s too soon. I’ll either cry or yell or… I don’t know. It’s too hard.”
“Oh.” She’s quiet for a few seconds. “Okay. If you’re sure. Let me know if you want to get together on Sunday,” she adds. “Brunch or something.”
“Yeah, sure. Thanks.”
—
The next day, Kaya is in the library again, grading papers and wishing she could go back to being a grad student who’s biggest problem was a pop quiz. She’s deliberately chosen a table at the back, away from where the students generally sit, which is why she looks up in surprise when someone comes to her table.
“H-hi, Kaya.” The student waves rests one hand on the back of an empty hair and waves hesitantly with the other.
“Um… hi.” Kaya tries not to frown too conspicuously, for she’s sure she knows this girl. 
Svetlana. Savannah. 
“Elena, right?”
“Yeah,” she answers with a nervous smile. “Um… are you busy?”
Kaya glances at the stacks of papers, books and laptop on the table. “Kind of, yeah.”
“Okay. Well… I just wanted to say hi.”
Kaya nods awkwardly and forces a small smile on her face. “Hi.”
Elena nods, tucking her hair behind her ears. She looks like she’s about to leave but at the last moment, sits down at the table. Kaya feels her smile fade for she really, really wants to be alone right now.
“How - how are things going?” She sounds nervous - extremely so. She seems to be fidgeting slightly and constantly touching her hair. 
“Great,” says Kaya shortly, going back to her paper and hoping she’ll take the hint. “You?”
“Not bad, overall. I guess. Classes are hard and mid-terms are coming up as well…” Elena trails off. “Any plans for the weekend?”
Trying not to sigh, Kaya shakes her head. “Not really. You?”
“Well… I’m going to a concert tomorrow,” she answers hurriedly, and it’s clear that she’s been waiting to divulge this information, oblivious to how Kaya’s heart stops. “It should be fun. Do - do you listen to BTS?”
An unexpected notification from this morning floats into her kind. BTS continues their Europe leg by arriving in Amsterdam, ready to kick off the summer in style!
“No,” she answers truthfully.
“Oh.” Elena is quiet for a moment. “They’re really… good.” 
There’s some awkward silence during which Kaya deliberately writes comments on the paper she’s grading, scratching the pen on the paper and wishing Elena would leave.
“It’ll be good to get out of campus. The people here are kind of intimidating. The parties are pretty wild, too,” she murmurs after a moment, sounding uncomfortable.
Kaya nods absently, uncharacteristically satisfied with the knowledge that she might be intimidating this unwanted guest. “Maybe you’re going to the wrong parties,” she offers.
Elena lets out a nervous laugh again. “Maybe. I never see you at them, though. There’s one, tonight, in the common room. Maybe you could come,” she suggests lightly. “Bring a friend or - or your boyfriend.”
“I don’t have a boyfriend,” she answers flatly, not looking up.
“You - oh.” There’s a note of surprise in her voice. “Oh,” she repeats, this time seemingly to herself. “Are you sure?” she blurts out.
Kaya’s eyes snap up to glare at her. “Pretty sure.”
Elena’s eyes widen. “Oh, of - of course,” she stutters. “Sorry, that - that was a stupid question. Sorry.” She swallows and looks at her lap.
Kaya closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, immediately feeling guilty for snapping at an innocent bystander in this situation. “Elena, I… I really need to get these papers done,” she tells her, her voice one of forced calm. “So…”
The blonde finally seems to understand and awkwardly stands up. “Okay. Um, see you around,” she says, tucking her hair behind her ear again. 
Kaya nods as she leaves, Namjoon’s invitation swimming in her mind tantalisingly. She can’t ignore it anymore, the fact that they’re in the same city, her city. If she’s not wrong, he’ll do the concert tomorrow night, the group will probably stay the night and depart by Sunday afternoon or evening and she will probably never see him again.
She attempts to continue grading the paper she was working on when Elena interrupted, but when she finds herself reading the same stupid sentence for the fourth time without retaining anything, she begins packing up, ready to head home.
—
Joon [18:42] Hope to see you there tonight
Kaya, with a loss as to how to respond to this, simply did not. She can’t imagine he would be texting her during his concert, but she also knows he has before, if the situation was urgent enough to demand it. 
She straightens the black dress against her hips and tilts her head at her reflection. It’s a simple dress, plain black, form-fitting and reaching below her knees, but it’s quite possibly the most gorgeous, sexiest dress she owns. 
If she and Namjoon were together, she would have worn it tonight with no hesitation because it would have driven him insane. After weeks of being apart, seeing her in this dress would have rendered him incapable of staying in work mode without dirty texts, flirty touches and eyes from across the room undressing her. Even now, with a bare face, her hair tied into a loose bun and no footwear, the dress is a game-changer.
She gives herself a few moments to imagine this paradise, one that might have come true tonight had she never told him about the break-in. Then, she silently unzips the dress and climbs out of the black fabric pooled around her feet. Tucking it back into her closet, she looks for something else.
Dilara [18:50] In case you change your mind, sharing the location here [Location]
Dilara’s text had come minutes after Namjoon’s, and Kaya has to imagine it was a genuine coincidence. Although she’d replied to neither, it was the second text that caused her to change her mind - that, and the lingering fear that if she didn’t go today, she didn’t know how either of them would be able to maneuver a situation to see each other again.
The concert should end in a little over an hour. Her phone pings again and she groans, for she doesn’t think she can take any more of their unsubtle attempts at convincing her to go tonight. It’s not Namjoon or Dilara, though, but Adam Fischer, her thirty-something thesis advisor, asking if she wants to discuss the coming week’s class schedule tonight.
Kaya shakes her head as she types out a reply (Sorry, I can’t tonight. Will set up a meeting for first thing Monday if that’s okay?), a little rueful. Namjoon heavily disliked Adam, despite having no concrete reason for doing so. He’d always suspected Adam of having feelings for her, even though Adam hadn’t said or done anything to make her think he might. Part of her wonders if she could somehow ditch the party for this meeting and still make sure that the news travelled to Namjoon through the grapevine (Dilara), and if that would still piss him off even now.
She immediately cringes at the pettiness of it, however, sending her reply to Adam and heading into the shower.
The party is at the rooftop restaurant of the hotel next to the concert venue, and presumably where BTS is staying while in Amsterdam. It isn’t as crowded as she was anticipating, although the music is fairly loud. It looks more like a fancy houseparty, and even a few seconds in, Kaya can spot a handful of vaguely famous people in attendance. She looks around for a familiar face, preferably Dilara or Yoongi or one of the younger boys, wishing she’d called ahead and trying not to think about the fact that in spite of not RSVP-ing, her name was on the guest list.
She takes another hesitant step in and audibly sighs when she spots Taehyung, who, for reasons best known to himself, has accessorised his outfit with an ascot. He seems to be in an animated conversation with Jungkook, while standing in between them and facing ahead, with loose curls tumbling down her shoulders and looking slightly bored, is…
“Kaya!”
Dilara’s mouth forms her name over the music as she brushes past her boyfriend and his friend and hurries towards Kaya, looking both happy and relieved to see her. “You look hot!” she exclaims when she reaches her.
“Oh -” Kaya looks down self-consciously; she’d settled for a straight strapless top and jeans, unable to justify dressing sexier without seeming like she was trying too hard for her ex-boyfriend. “Thanks. And you look…” She frowns slightly at Dilara’s mini-dress and go-go boots, with a slightly out-of-place gold ring hanging around her neck. “... like Daphne Blake.”
Dilara’s face visibly falls. “I look like a cartoon character?” she asks, wrinkling her nose.
“Well, a very pretty cartoon character,” she adds quickly. “Especially with the headband. But… why?”
She rolls her eyes. “Taehyung picked it - but I’m sure it’s not because of Daphne Blake.” Spotting Kaya’s confused expression, she shrugs sheepishly. “We got into an argument yesterday about who has better taste, so we decided to go shopping at The Nine Streets and pick each other’s outfits for tonight.”
Kaya raises her eyebrows, something seemingly clicking into place. “So the ascot is your doing?”
“M-hm.” She nods in satisfaction before her eyes widen. “Oh, hey! An ascot - like Fred!” She lets out a low whistle at this realisation and laughs, while Kaya nods knowingly, feeling the urge to smile for the first time in what feels like weeks. “Not planned but zero regrets. I wonder if Tae knows that - oh.”
Kaya cuts her off mid-sentence with a hug, suddenly immensely grateful for Dilara. She can’t remember the last time she’d let anyone into her life this much with the exception of Namjoon; but just maybe, when she’d been happy with him and her guard had been lowered, Dilara had slipped in without warning as well.
She tightens her arms around Kaya and rubs her back. “It’s good to see you, too,” she says, sounding part-surprised and part-delighted. “It’s been a while but I promise that we will still - oh, hey.” The change in tone is abrupt. “Incoming.”
By the way her voice immediately lowers, Kaya is sure she knows what Dilara is referring to. Her heart beating a mile a minute, she pulls away from the hug and turns as casually as she can.
Her first thought is that he looks thinner - visibly so. Well, he’s on tour, says a voice in her head but Kaya suspects that’s not the only reason, for he’d been on tour when he’d broken up with her as well.
His hair is a silvery blond, looking almost metallic; dressed simply in a black T-shirt and  jeans, he runs a hand through his hair so it falls gracefully around his face as he approaches her, his face unreadable.
“Hi,” he says, and it sounds like all the breath has been let out of him with just one word. He swallows and straightens his shoulders, a small smile appearing on his face, the dimple faintly visible. “It’s good to see you, Kaya.”
Kaya nods, unable to speak and overcome with a sudden urge to cry. “You, too,” she murmurs, glancing at the floor and blinking rapidly before looking back up at him, a bit defiantly.
“I’m glad you decided to come.”
She nods again, her chest twisting at how normal he sounds. He’s standing far away from her as well, as though to make it clear in every way possible that they’re not together. 
“Hope you had a good concert,” she ventures, recalling the grad student who’d accosted her yesterday, practically beside herself at attending a BTS concert. “Backstage must have been hectic.”
A flicker of something appears in his eyes for a moment, possibly with memories of backstage. Wishes of luck, last minute hugs, sweaty and passionate kisses fueled by adrenaline. But it disappears instantly and Kaya wonders if she imagined it.
“It was,” he answers, nodding. He slides his hands into his pockets smoothly, leaning back on his heels and his smile widening a little. “But worth it as always. The crew did well.”
Kaya doesn’t even bother nodding this time; all of a sudden, she regrets coming here tonight. Dilara has left, she just realises, and Namjoon is acting like they’re acquaintances at best, making her feel stupid and yet immensely grateful that she didn’t wear the sexy black dress.
At that moment, his eyes flicker to something behind her. “I’m sorry, I just need to go and say hi to a couple of people. But enjoy your night. It’s an open bar,” he adds, smiling and nodding politely before brushing past her and walking away.
Kaya doesn’t move; she doesn’t think she can. Something heavy feels like it’s settled on her chest, the weight of confusion, disbelief and crushing disappointment threatening to suffocate her. She has no idea what she’d been expecting; maybe arguing, fighting, crying together again - but not him not caring. Not this.
Namjoon continues walking in the opposite direction for as long as he can keep Kaya in his peripheral vision, both guilty and relieved when she doesn’t turn around. He doesn’t think he can look her in the eye if she does, witness the pain and hurt in her face that close.
He catches Seokjin’s eye and hurries over to him. Seokjin raises his eyebrows and seems to guess what might have transpired, ushering him over to the other end of the circular bar and out of Kaya’s line of sight.
“How did it go?”
Namjoon rests his palms on the bar and shakes his head, no words coming to him at the moment and feeling like he could throw up. He can’t fathom how he did it, how he stood there before her and didn’t immediately pull her to him, or break down and ask her to forgive him for doing the only thing he knew to do.
“Drink this.” Seokjin slides a glass to him and Namjoon takes it without hesitation, taking a huge gulp and waiting for it to sting his sinuses. 
“This is water,” he states hoarsely, frowning at the glass.
“Cold water,” corrects Seokjin. “It’ll help clear your head.”
Namjoon takes another sip and places the glass down, dropping his head into his hands. “I can’t do this. How do I tell her I can’t do this? How do I ask her to -“ But he breaks off here, his mind swimming with the sight of her bare shoulders and exposed collarbones, imagining how they would feel if he held her.
“Okay.” Seokjin exhales through his nose and pauses. “Look, I have to ask. You’ve seen the state she is in. And you’re…” He struggles for a moment “...like this. Are you absolutely sure you don’t want to ask her to get back -“
“No.” The answer is instant, although it’s partly a habit by now. As he does every time his mind tries to convince him otherwise, Namjoon forces the memory of her phone call to the forefront of his mind, the fear in her voice and  devastation on her face when he’d entered her apartment.
“But maybe this is -“
“No.” 
Seokjin is silent and Namjoon can tell that he doesn’t approve. Please don’t ask me again, hyung. He doesn’t know if he did the right thing by inviting her but he couldn’t imagine not doing it either, not being right here in her city, knowing she was so close that he could almost smell the coconut and vanilla in the air and still not see her in the flesh.
“If you’re sure,” says Seokjin at last. “If you are, then I guess you did well. Just… just be normal around her. Keep a normal distance, talk about normal things and…” He half-shrugs, sounding uncertain. “She’s smart. She’ll understand. If you’re sure you want to do this, then… she’ll get it.”
Normal. Namjoon knows what he means, but he wants to tell him that none of this is normal. Not touching her, not being honest with her, not being with her - none of it is normal. 
“She’s talking to Yoongi right now,” he adds, and Namjoon turns to see them near the stairs to the top floor. Kaya’s back is to him, her head lowered slightly and her thumbs hooked onto the back pockets of her jeans, the material hugging her hips and curving down her backside… He swallows and looks away.
“This is your chance,” says Seokjin. “Go and mingle. Let her see you moving on - even if you actually aren’t,” he clarifies quickly. “It won’t be pleasant but it might encourage her to do the same.”
Namjoon isn’t sure of the wisdom of this strategy but ever since the cause of his break-up had been revealed to the older members (and surely to Taehyung at least, by Dilara), he’d almost been relieved that he wouldn’t have to make every decision on his own.
He tries his best to navigate the party after that, making empty conversation with guests, using every bit of remaining energy and willpower to plaster a smile on his face. All the while, part of his attention is constantly on Kaya, registering her familiar figure alone at the bar as she nurses a beer, sometimes with Dilara. 
Be normal. Seokjin’s words start holding less and less meaning with every passing minute, especially when he spots Kaya having finished her drink and he’s struck with the sudden fear that she will leave the party. In an effort to be as normal as he can, Namjoon heads over to the bar where she’s scanning the life-size menu half-heartedly, arms folded across her chest.
“Like anything?” he asks humbly. Long Island Iced Tea or a Mai Tai - depends on the flavours. His heart jolts when she shoots him a doubtful look and doesn’t answer, almost as if she’s wary of talking to him. She leans over the bar and gives the bartender a smile that makes his heart drop, especially when he grins back.
“Komt de mai tai in mango?” she asks, half-pouting when he shakes his head. “Een biertje, alsjeblieft,” she says finally, taking her second beer and turning away from the bar.
Namjoon doesn’t remember ever feeling this distant from her. “I’m glad you came tonight,” he tries again, choosing to look at her even though she’s facing away.
Kaya nods, pursing her lips and looking ahead. “Yeah, you said that already.” But her voice trembles ever so slightly, or maybe he just knows her so well that he’s sure it’s not a case of her not wanting to look at him - she can’t look at him.
It’s all on him now. He started this; if there is any hope of them still staying in each other’s lives, it’s down to him to make it happen. 
“How’s your dissertation going?” he asks, hoping her work is a topic she might open up on.
She shrugs after a moment. “Off schedule,” she answers shortly. “A lot of variables hanging in the air.”
“Did you get into the research project you’d applied for?”
It’s momentary but it appears: the corner of her mouth tilts upwards. “Yeah,” she admits, finally looking at him, albeit hesitantly. “Guess I’ll have a lot more time to focus on it now,” she murmurs, the hint of a smile fading.
Namjoon’s heart sinks. She’s so angry with him; it’s palpable and not something he has ever been on the receiving end of. Her hand hangs by her side; his own itches to link his fingers with his, maybe tug her to him or lead her out of this stupid party where he can plead for her to just look at him.
“Well,” he says, then pauses. “I’m glad you could get the time off tonight. Must have been hard.”
“M-hm, not really.” She shakes her head. “Adam wanted to meet but I’ll probably catch up with him later,” she adds nonchalantly.
Namjoon nods, his hand tightening around his glass. He can’t tell if she’s trying to provoke him, for they do work closely; close enough that Adam’s intentions have always been a point of disagreement for them. He’d never been able to explain to her just how much he hated the way her advisor looked at her when she didn’t notice, how his hugs always lingered a moment too long or how he insisted on calling her late in the evenings to discuss work.
He’s distracted momentarily by Jungkook, who approaches them while bopping effortlessly to the music and stops in between them, turning to face in the same direction as Namjoon and Kaya. He’s definitely tipsy; the smile on his face is too big and he doesn’t seem to be reading the room at all.
“Dilara is a really good dancer, isn’t she?” he says loudly in English to no one in particular. Namjoon frowns and follows his gaze to see Dilara, Taehyung and Hoseok dancing, before turning back to look at Jungkook. On his other side, Kaya is also frowning at him, tilting her head curiously. Their eyes meet and she raises her eyebrows slightly.
Namjoon fights a smile as Kaya half-chuckles and looks away, his heart twisting with longing at how much he misses her. She looks so incredibly beautiful; his eyes sting when he realises that there’s absolutely nothing he can do about it.
“I’m gonna -“ He gestures vaguely and walks away in the opposite direction, desperate to be anywhere but around her before his resolve breaks.
The next half hour is a flurry of faces; Namjoon distracts himself with every single individual at the party, making small talk and exchanging unfunny jokes and hyper aware of Kaya occasionally glancing at him.
He knows, because he’s watching her, too, doing his best to make sure she doesn’t see him looking. He can’t even help it; it’s almost muscle memory at this point.
“Who are you looking at?” The woman he’s talking to asks him point-blank.
Namjoon flushes, realising he’d been staring at Kaya over her shoulder while she’d been speaking.
“No one,” he answers quickly. “Sorry.”
The twenty-something woman frowns curiously. “Are you sure? I’m not offended.”
“It’s… nothing.” He shakes his head and looks at the floor. 
“Ex-girlfriend?”
Ex. Not trusting himself to speak, Namjoon nods. 
“Hm.” She hums, somewhat sympathetically. “Bad break-up?”
“Pretty bad.”
“I’m sorry,” she says after a moment. “It’s never easy to be around an ex if it hasn’t ended well.”
“Yeah, well,” he says, desperate to change the topic. “All part of the process, right?”
“Right,” she says encouragingly. “Plus, once you’re past this phase, the one where you constantly want to die, you can begin the drink and eat and hook up as much as you want stage with no judgement.”
He chuckles politely, the prospect sounding horrendous. “Thanks. Feels good to laugh for real.”
She smiles wider and, before he knows it, leans forward and presses a kiss against his lips.
It takes Namjoon a couple of seconds of pure shock before he jumps backwards. “Whoa. What -“ His heart races uncomfortably. “What was that?”
“Sorry,” she says slowly, looking a little confused. “I thought… you wanted to make your ex jealous. Isn’t that where you were going with this?”
“No,” he clarifies immediately. “No. Absolutely not. I don’t want to - no.” In the midst of his minor crisis, he notes how the woman looks almost mortified.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to -”
“It’s fine,” he cuts her off, suddenly feeling horribly guilty. He looks up out of habit and sees, unmistakably, Kaya leaving the restaurant, her long dark hair and the shimmery dark blue of her top disappearing out the door.
—
The night has gotten chillier in the last couple of hours and the cool wind hits her bare shoulders the moment she steps out, but Kaya barely feels it. She’s not thinking right now; thinking is what’s got them here, thinking about everything and overthinking to the point of fleeing a restaurant.
“Kaya!” 
Her feet increase their pace automatically the same time her stomach flips, but he’s taller and faster and he reaches her before she can even reach the elevator.
“Kaya,” he repeats hurriedly, reaching and grabbing her elbow. “Wait, please. I’m sorry -”
“Why did you even invite me here?” she asks, cutting him off and turning around to face him. She’s so tired; she didn’t think break-ups could be this exhausting. “You’ve barely said anything to me. Was it to show me in person how you’re moving on? Because if that’s the case, then… message received.”
Namjoon shakes his head immediately; he looks exhausted as well, and Kaya is once again struck by how much thinner he is, overcome with a mixture of empathy and frustration at him. 
“That was not - I didn’t plan that,” he says, sighing. “I don’t even know who she is. She kissed me and it wasn’t… come on, does it look like I’m moving on?” he asks, raising his arms helplessly.
Kaya stares at him and then sighs, shaking her head. “Why did you invite me here?” she asks again, less defensive this time.
“Because I wanted to see you,” he says at once.
She stares at him. “Well, you’ve seen me,” she says, sniffing. “Can I go now?”
“Kaya…”
“What?”
Namjoon runs a hand through his hair, looking lost for words. “Please don’t -“ He breaks off abruptly before taking a step closer to her, his height both large and comforting. “I don’t want you to be sad. I’m sorry.”
Too late. “You’re not supposed to care how I feel. Not anymore.”
He lets out a humourless chuckle. “What?”
“We’re over.” She can hear the tremble in her voice as she crosses her arms across her chest again. “You said it yourself. You’re not supposed to care how I feel.”
“Really?” He narrows his eyes at her. “You think this break-up had anything to do with how I feel about you? You know as I do that it didn’t.” When she doesn’t answer, he sighs. “I did this because I care.”
“If you say so.”
He pokes his tongue into his cheek. “Are you deliberately trying to provoke me or something?”
“Provoke you into what?” she blurts out. “What - what is that you want, exactly? What do you want us to do? Just circle around in each other’s orbits for the rest of our lives, while still being - while still feeling the way we do?” she asks, avoiding her almost-slip of tongue. “We’re just supposed to stay not be together and still stay in each other’s lives? What - what do you want?”
Namjoon opens his mouth but falls silent; it’s clear he hasn’t thought that far ahead - or he can’t say it out loud. “I want…” He begins, before pausing and starting again. “I want… you to be happy,” he says eventually. “And safe.” 
She scoffs and he bristles. 
“I’m serious. I -” He breaks off when someone exits the restaurant, his gaze following them until they’re out of sight before he turns back to her. “This is hard for me, too, you know? Why is it so hard for you to believe I might want you to be happy?”
Kaya exhales but doesn’t answer, because it isn’t hard to believe, not even a little bit. It’s unfortunately the most believable thing he’s ever said to her which means she can’t even fight it.
“How?” she asks finally. “By moving on, like you were pretending to do?”
Namjoon bites his lip and his eyes glaze over, and she knows he’s picturing it. His eyes fall to the floor but he nods slowly anyway. “Yeah, I guess. As long as I don’t have to watch it,” he adds in a mutter.
It’s really over. Kaya feels her eyes well up. “Fine,” she answers quietly. “If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go find someone to move on with tonight.” She turns to leave but feels him stop her again. “What?” she snarls.
“Kaya, I -” The lift opens and a handful of people tumble out, holding merchandise and talking loudly. Namjoon’s eyes widen and he immediately grabs her arms and walks her back into a corner, just as the group turns into their corridor and towards the restaurant.
“What are you -”
But the second lift opens just then and they hear the sound of a second group of voices. Namjoon swears under his breath and pushes open a door behind her, walking her back further into the tiny dark room and letting the door swing shut behind him.
“What is wrong with -“
“It’s press,” he hisses, and she falls silent.
He peers out into the corridor through the small window in the door; there’s no light except for the bit through the window and from a skylight in the ceiling. Kaya can smell something vaguely citric that she decides is floor cleaner; they are in a janitor’s closet.
She and Namjoon are frozen in place, his hands still on her arms and hers on his torso to keep from losing her balance. It’s been a long time since they’ve been this close; it takes Kaya a few seconds to realise that the voices outside have disappeared, but he still hasn’t moved away.
Almost as if he’s subconsciously heard her, his thumbs stroke her arm once. The simple touch makes all the anger crumble away for a moment, especially now that it’s just them with the rest of the world shut outside. Kaya hesitates for a moment, then gently rests her forehead on his shoulder. Namjoon stiffens but a moment later, she feels his fingers tighten above her elbows, followed by him loosely enveloping her in his arms.
It seems cruel, almost, that the target of her anger and source of her comfort lie in the same person. It isn’t even a hug; it’s a moment of weakness at best, borne from his almost subconscious need to protect her. For the first time, Kaya wonders if she’s being unfair to him.
Resisting the temptation to wrap her arms around his waist, she steps away from him with difficulty, her back touching the wall. His arms fall from around her reluctantly, his expression resigned. It’s dark but she can see him more clearly than she has all night.
“This is a terrible idea,” she murmurs, echoing her words from a month ago. “The worst you’ve ever had.”
Namjoon exhales shakily but doesn’t argue. “I meant everything I said in that note,” he says, not even trying to hide the tremble in his voice anymore. “And I really do want you to be happy.”
The note. The one he’d kept on her bedside table when he’d left her apartment while she slept, the only thing of his that was left when she’d awoken, naked and alone. She’d only had the strength to read it once before she’d broken down and tucked it deep into her drawer, knowing the words would be etched in her memory.
“You know what will make me happy,” she whispers, looking at the ground. She feels him come closer to her, one hand hovering by her side as though unable to decide if she’d want her to touch him. 
He finally rests it lightly on her waist, moving it slightly upward as she looks up at him, her heart twisting at how he’s unable to meet her eyes. She places her hands on his face, thinking vaguely how much she misses seeing his dimple.
“Joon,” she whispers, waiting for him to nod once. “Look at me.”
Namjoon visibly swallows, gaze still fallen. “Kaya, I…”
“No,” she interrupts him. “Look at me.”
With what seems like an enormous effort, he meets her eyes. This is hard for me too, you know? 
She knows. Kaya strokes his cheekbones with her thumbs, her touch feather-light. “Kiss me,” she whispers. She touches her forehead to his and closes her eyes, hoping he’ll give in, for she can’t go further than this. 
His hand tightens around her waist, pressing her into the wall. Their lips brush momentarily and he shivers.
“Do it,” she urges, her voice barely audible now. “Kiss me.”
She feels his lips before she even registers him moving against her and she leans into it, feeling like she can breathe for the first time in weeks. Come back to me, she thinks desperately. Come back to where you belong.
It’s like he can hear her. Namjoon pulls away, one hand on the wall beside her face for support, the other holding her.
“Fuck,” he whispers, and it sends a jolt of anticipation through her heart. “I love you, Kaya,” he adds, voice full of emotion. Kaya nods, unable to speak, wishing he would meet her eyes. He moves his hands to her face and touches his forehead to hers again, swallowing.
Look at me.
But he doesn’t. “But you have no idea,” he continues, every word sounding like it's costing him effort, “how I felt when you called me that night. The things that went through my mind…” He sniffs, and Kaya’s heart sinks. “I can’t let that happen again baby. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry…”
She can feel her face start to contort and she drops her hands from his shoulders, for she knows this part by heart. “Goodbye, Namjoon,” she mutters thickly, sliding out from between him and the wall. She pushes open the door and hurries out, leaving him behind.
—
When she hears the knock on her front door the next morning, Kaya is just about to step into the shower. She freezes and sighs, for she really, really needs this shower. She considers ignoring it but the knock sounds again and she groans, abandoning the activity of tying up her hair and letting it fall loose instead. 
Grabbing the old, threadbare robe hanging on the back of the bathroom door, she pulls it around herself and shuffles to the front door. She peers through the peephole and her heart stops for a moment, but she steels herself and opens the door.
Namjoon stands before her, hands in his pockets and shoulders slightly hunched. “Hey. I just wanted to - oh, God,” he switches abruptly, his expression changing from vaguely apologetic to shocked, and he slips inside the apartment.
“What?” Kaya asks, taken off guard and stumbling backwards.
“You really opened the door wearing that?” he hisses, shutting the door behind him. “I could’ve been anyone!”
“I knew it was you,” she argues, tightening the belt around her waist and realising, for the first time, how short the robe is. But she isn’t about to admit that to him, especially not when he’s turned up unannounced and decided to begin his visit by berating her. She folds her arms across her chest. “What do you want, Namjoon?”
He hesitates, almost as though he’s just noticing how displeased she is. “Sorry,” he mutters, looking a bit ashamed. “I didn’t mean to… anyway,” he says quickly, wringing his hands and slipping them back in his pockets. “How are you?”
Kaya shrugs suspiciously. He looks remarkably different from where she’d left him last night, almost breaking down and apologising to her. Right now, he seems almost… calm. She can almost imagine that last night had been a slip-up of emotion, possibly due to tiredness and an open bar, whereas in the light of day, he’s back to being the responsible ex who’s fulfilling his obligations by checking up on her each day.
“I’m great.”
He nods after a moment, clearly not believing her. “Well, I came here because…” He sighs and a glimmer of last night’s emotion appears on his face. “I thought about what you said last night. And you were right.”
The jolt in her stomach is almost painful, but Kaya hangs on. If he was talking about what she thinks he is, he would be delivering it far more differently.
“We can’t keep doing this. I can’t expect you to keep doing this,” he adds. “Staying in this limbo, not knowing…” He bites his lip and lowers his gaze, removing his hands from his pockets. “You have every right to move on. I want you to - to be happy.”
Kaya licks her lips slowly. “This,” she says coldly, “could’ve been a text.”
“I didn’t want to leave things the way they were last night,” he tells her, his voice softer. “You’re, uh…” His voice breaks off for a moment. “You’re the love of my life. And we were together for a long time and I… I loved every moment of it. I just want to say goodbye the right way.”
Her throat hurts holding back the rush of emotion that threatens to overwhelm her. 
“Are you sure?” She can’t resist asking, in a whisper. When he nods and lowers his eyes, she feels the heavy, heavy anchor of acceptance settle in her stomach. 
Namjoon hesitantly reaches out with one hand but when she gives him a look, he nods and steps forward, and they meet in their last hug, three and a half years after their first last hug in her apartment.
Kaya hugs him tight, no longer caring about hiding how she feels. There isn’t enough time to try and memorise everything so she doesn’t even try; she just goes higher on her toes and presses her nose into his shoulder, revelling in his scent one last time.
Namjoon doesn’t seem to be doing much better. He’s holding her tight, so tight that it doesn’t seem like he’s ever intending on letting her go. His face is in her hair and his arms stroke her back in small movements, his go-to movement to comfort her since they met.
Just a few more seconds. The sensations increase now; the feel of his shoulders, his chest touching hers - and she’s suddenly conscious of the thin robe being the only thing separating her naked body from him.
At the same time, his hands move to her waist - out of habit, she knows, but she can’t help but be extremely aware of it. His hand stops just above the curve of her hips, quickly and abruptly. 
Her mouth feels dry, but her legs press together. Then, as though he can read her mind and the direction her thoughts are invariably leading in, against her hip, she can feel his body react.
She lets out a soft gasp and feels his body stiffen around her. This is goodbye, a voice reminds her, urging her brain to focus on the matter at hand. But it’s slipping - fading, almost, as a physical urge struggles for dominance. 
Her lips brush his neck as she pulls away - she has to pull away - but it doesn’t matter in the end because somewhere along the way his lips find hers and all thought disappears, replaced by touch, feel and hunger.
Namjoon sighs into her mouth like he’s breathing for the first time, pulling her close. Her robe starts to loosen and he tugs at the belt, groaning when his hands touch her bare skin.
“Fuck, are you really not wearing anything under this?” he murmurs, his voice so low and reverberating so deep inside her that she shivers.
The robe is off; it’s cool and sudden air, a moment where his hands fall from her waist and then their back but this time, it’s skin against skin. It’s lips and sighs and tight grips, the feel of denim, her fingers moving out of habit as they unbutton and unzip - and then there’s pride and relief when she feels his desire for her, still the same as ever, no matter his words.
There’s something solid against her back; somewhere, dimly, her mind registers that her dining table is rickety and has her laptop on it, and then she’s leaning forward and he’s behind her and his chest is against her back and he wants her just as much as he wants him.
“Are you -“
“I’m still on birth control,” she confirms tightly, the next moment feeling his fingers on her hips and then he’s inside her again, after so long. She could almost sob at how good it feels, how right, the lips on her shoulder and his scent and touch.
But it’s over too soon. She gasps and falls forward, her ears ringing and heart hurting at the same time as her heart races. He’s getting close, too; she tries to memorise it now, the exact moment, but then he pulls out. It’s sudden, the emptiness, but the next moment, she feels wetness on her back.
It takes around ten seconds, ten seconds when she’s frozen before she finally hears him sigh and take a step away. A moment later, she reaches across the table and pulls the tissue box towards her, reaching behind and wiping her back.
Kaya turns slightly to see him pulling on his T-shirt, jeans buttoned already. She picks up her robe and pulls it on hurriedly, suddenly not wanting to be naked for even another microsecond in front of him.
Something feels wrong. It’s not the first time he’s finished on her; he’s done it before, on explicit request and without, none of which ever made her feel… like this. Self-conscious. Bare.
Namjoon clears his throat. “I -“ He meets her eyes, still panting slightly. “I still want to… do this right,” he says, sounding almost formal. “Goodbye, Kaya.” 
He starts to take a step forward but pauses. “Maybe we shouldn’t hug,” he murmurs, offering her a small smile. Kaya watches as he hesitantly offers her a hand.
This is goodbye. Kaya can’t remember ever feeling this uncomfortable around him. The momentary loss of her sense of reason feels like it’s returned in full form, and she tightens the robe around her. She starts to reach for his hand but then stops.
“This is what you meant?” she asks quietly. “When you said you wanted to do it the right way? You wanted to see if you could squeeze in one last fuck before you closed this out like a business meeting?”
“What?” Namjoon’s eyes widen. “No! I didn’t - I didn’t want that to happen! I mean - you know that’s not what I meant,” he adds quickly. “I didn’t plan this. You and I both -“
“You planned our break-up and I had no idea,” she cuts him off, the shame and embarrassment creeping up her throat. “I really don’t know anymore.”
He scoffs, but his eyes flicker like he’s been stung. “Is that what you think of me? We were both here, Kaya. It wasn’t just me - you wanted this just as much as I -“
“I slept with Adam.” 
Namjoon freezes. He swallows and his eyes flicker again, rapidly this time. “You’re lying,” he whispers.
Kaya shrugs, holding his gaze with every last bit of willpower in her. “You were the one who told me to move on last night,” she reminds him, watching his expression crumble and doing nothing to stop it.
After what feels like several minutes, or maybe even hours, Namjoon nods slowly. Then, without another word, he turns around and opens the door, walking out of her life and shutting the door behind him.
—
Thanks for reading. Don't forget to drop a review :)
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yazthebookish ¡ 1 year ago
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I posted my take on the Lightsinger theory and Gwyn's "luring" powers theory on Reddit two days ago but thought I'll reshare it here (with some additional thoughts)
The only canon information we have on Lightsingers:
Nesta winced. Cassian went on as she scanned the bog, "There are lightsingers: lovely, ethereal beings who will lure you, appearing as friendly faces when you are lost. Only when you're in their arms will you see their true faces, and they aren't fair at all. The horror of it is the last thing you see before they drown you in the bog. But they kill for sport, not food."
Does this correlate with anything Gwyn did in ACOSF? The answer is no.
I am not saying it is impossible for her to be a Lightsinger though where things stand it's unlikely in my opinion, but I'd attribute any potential powers either singing or glowing to her River Nymph heritage. We have no idea of her powers and she's also half High Fae of course she'll have powers like every other High Fae.
I think a lot of the "canon evidence" are different interpretations of the text but sometimes try to present itself as concrete evidence or proof when it isn't. Some attribute her singing during the services as the cause to Nesta having vision of the Prison and the Harp, but that also means we will have to ask what connection is there between Lightsingers and the Prison/Harp? And some believe it's the lyrics that trigger the vision as they're written in the ancient language and "Nesta saw what the song spoke of". Some believe Nesta power reacting to the crackling energy around Gwyn is a sign that she is a Lightsinger, but like... that's an indicator she has powers just like how Nesta in a later chapter felt Merrill's ornerry power. How is crackling energy means it's a Lightsinger when we never saw them? Powers recognize each other sometimes, just like how Feyre was surprised when Eris was able to detect a cold flame in the Dagger Nesta forged when it was given to him as a gift (like calls to like, Eris also has flame power).
In the bonus chapter, it's described at one point that the Shadows danced with Gwyn's breath as if it heard some Silent MUSIC (emphasis on music and not song). What was referred to as Music between Souls? The mating bond. Interestingly enough it was that same night when Nessian consummated their bond and they were connected by a music between their souls. So that could be a hint, and at the end of the scene Azriel hears a distant beautiful singing and the shadows sing back, hard to tell whether if it's Gwyn, who went back to trying to cut the ribbon, starts to sing or it's also another wording for a hint at the mating bond (also called the Song of the Soul).
I'm more keen to believe it's the mating bond because there are far more parallels and similar mate language to support it across all her three series and if someone is going to tell me "but Lorcan's chest glowed after he took the blood oath from Aelin—" my love context matters in this case and it doesn't invalidate the 10+ examples I can pull out of similar mate language like in the bonus chapter.
To ADD, for Azriel to be lured to the library at 7pm because of said Lightsinger singing, he has to be able to HEAR the singing for the power to influence him and Azriel didn't hear any singing, he was conscious and aware of his actions. It was mentioned Nesta sang with Gwyn at the services frequently and she didn't make any comments on a vision being triggered or her constantly seeking out Gwyn so there are holes in those kind of conclusions—again, because we never see Lightsingers on page.
"But when he arrives to the library it chimed 7pm!! That's when they sing for the dusk service" welp that's another hole in the theory, it depends on Azriel being drawn to the library because of Gwyn's singing but if he showed up at the library and they don't sing until 7pm then before the clock chimes at 7pm, they weren't singing so... not a convincing answer. Also, Clotho is usually seen during those services and Azriel still found her at her desk.
Early on when ACOSF came out, some readers made connections between Lightsingers and Shadowsingers and made the assumption that Lightsingers are the Shadowsingers' Light counterparts. That's why you had people musing about Azriel's mate being a Lightsinger, but canonically Lightsingers are evil once we go back to the text but we don't even see them to know for sure how they wield their powers or if they even sing because Shadowsinger Azriel doesn't need to sing when he uses his power.
In an Elain book (in this scenario it's her and Azriel), I don't see any purpose of Gwyn being revealed as a Lightsinger or anything about her powers because it'll be used as a plot device for an Elain/Azriel romance rather than contribute to Gwyn's own growth and that's why I don't like it. It will have implications on Nesta and the Valkyries dynamic too. If that's the case it will mean Gwyn will need more page time in an Elain and Azriel book to tackle something like that, especially if they're going to "help" her since that's the reasoning I see often—that she's not evil but she doesn't know it and if she did they will help her but like... why? To make her realize she has been keeping them apart or that she wanted a necklace she didn't even have any clue about.
Given Gwyn's history who even at the end of the book said despite training it didn't erase the fact that she let her sister die, she is still dealing with survivor's guilt, she still refuses to wear the priestesses stone, and also her desire to leave the library and see the world (which we didn't see yet). She has a lot of promise as a character than be a plot device for someone else's relationship.
The way I see it, Gwyn's theoretical powers is used to absolve Azriel of any accountability for his actions (ala Necklacegate) because it's not a good look on him, so it's better to pin it on someone else by saying he was lured against his will (since I often see that the reasoning behind her presence in the bonus chapter is to hint at her powers).
So if I have to read about Gwyn dealing with her powers whether they're good or bad, I'd rather see it from her point of view and for it to be beneficial for her own personal arc and healing journey. My problem isn't her having questionable powers (which I don't mind because many SJM characters had questionable powers but used it for good), I don't want it to be used as a plot device for another couple just to smear her as a character and clear the actions of the other male character so his "love interest" doesn't blame him for his actions.
Whew, this was long but I adore Gwyn and I am not a fan of the current version of the Lightsinger theory. I think even if SJM makes it happen, it would probably play out way differently than the fandom expects.
Also, it's not in SJM's style to use other woman drama in her romances. The other women are often 💀 or insignificant past lovers. I don't see her taking that route with Gwyn at all.
She could be half Asteri and I would still love her and be eager to explore her powers and story, I just don't like it being used to further another couple's conflict or whatever (they already have Rhys and Lucien).
And no, I hate the idea of Gwyn being controlled by either Koschei or Merrill because it takes away her agency and the suggestion here is about her doing things that harms others, how will that not have any implications on Nesta and Emerie and the trio's healing journey? Given her own tragic history and the fact that she was helpless and powerless to help her twin sister and she's still dealing with survivor's guilt over it all.
"Why did you sign up for this, then?" Nesta drank the glass Gwyn extended. "If you already have mind-calming exercises you're accustomed to?"
"Because I don't ever want to feel powerless again," Gwyn said softly, and all those easy smiles and bright laughs were gone. Only stark, pained honesty shone in her remarkable eyes.
Her being controlled is putting her in a powerless position again because she has no choice but to do Koschei or "evil" Merrill's bidding that could potentially harm Nesta and the others. I despite it.
And if I have to read about any comparisons between Gwyn and Ianthe as proof that priestesses can be evil, I'll go insane.
Also, if Gwyn's power can influence anyone through her singing, it would've influenced every single person in the services. It would have influenced other members of the IC. This particular theory is weak and depends one interpretation of the text that tries to present itself as evidence of an evil creature that never even shows up on page.
Gwyn wasn't added in the bonus chapter by coincidence. Sarah confirmed she left crumbs all over the book and specifically his bonus chapter, and what we speculate may or may not be confirmed in the next book so you can't dismiss the bonus by saying it has no relevance when the author said she left crumbs for readers to theorize about, which leads me to believe she wants us to come up with different theories until she publishes the next book where we'll know for sure if we nailed it or not.
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goldenchocobo ¡ 11 months ago
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So me and two of my friends have started a Gaming Culture Exchange. It’s where we give one game that means a lot to us, or embodies us as a person for the other two to play. I, of course- picked Kingdom Hearts.
It took a bit of thought to whittle it down, but in the end, I chose to get my friends to play KHII.  Because 1) it’s a fan favourite, 2) It has MUCH better combat and fluidity of controls than KHI, and 3) While yeah- you should play KHII and CoM, you can still glean the story; which is what I wanted them to play for. And if they don't understand anything- I'm here.
We meet up every Saturday night, and they play for 2-3 hours whilst I watch and act as a guide/tip-giver.
I wanted to document their experiences because they’re (mostly) fresh eyes in ‘24. This took so long to do because I kept forgetting to ask their permission to do this. How long? When we devised this, the KH series was announced that it was coming to steam during the VC call. I kind of laughed at the irony.
For now, let me introduce you to my friends! I’m not using any of their real names/what I call them due to identity.
Isopod: She/They: We get along really well and often watch shows together, play games or hang out. They’re more of a slow-paced gamer, liking farming sims and the less action-heavy Minecraft parts, but overall she loves genetic sims/ family tree games (wobbledogs, niece etc…). She’s seen little bits of KH, but doesn’t know a whole bunch. Their game for this exchange is Rainworld.
Dog: He/Him: We’re good friends that can get on each other's nerves and argue over pedantic stuff. He likes grimdark things and was the one who introduced me to Berserk. We, along with Isopod, watched Dungeon Meshi together, and I got him to watch Demon Slayer, which he’s enjoying. He actively dislikes/is uninterested in KH, not liking the style clash. His game for this exchange is Eldenring.
Due to the lag with getting permissions, each new entry will be each day until I've caught up, then every Sunday. Each day will be a reblog of this post with a Keep reading spoiler tag so that it doesn't clutter, but can be read in order.
Now that the stage is set, the journey starts below;
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The game starts, and we jam out to Sanctuary. Isopod already kind of remembers who Roxas is and why he's here, but Dog doesn't- instead, he comments on the 'Gaming Rig' Roxas has got set up (the weird contraption with the light up star in his room) while Isopod laments that they'll never own a lamp as cool as his fish one.
'oh no, our ___ are gone!' "Your WHAT" -Dog
"I thought my audio glitched for a second" -Isopod
We then have to wait because Dog needed to eat dinner because his timing with that is impeccable, let me tell you. This let Isopod explore a bit and examine Roxas' outfit- which she concludes is a 'disaster'(lovingly).
It's then noted that Isopod is playing with Keyboard and mouse, and I m horrified. Dog is playing with an X-box controller and I lovingly refer to him as a heathen.
When Dog came back, the tutorial was completed, but I noticed that Dog... never really read the text. "I read it when Isopod has it up on her stream" he says. This'll bean important fact later.
During the Siefer fight, Isopod picks magic and Dog picks defence.
"woah whatda-" "Demon! actual demon!" Isopod and Dog during their first sighting of a Dusk. Quickly followed up with Isopod saying "why's he got cheeks though???"
The Dusk fight was quickly finished, and they both liked the reaction command (important for later).
"Why are they not calling for an adult. This (strange man) had pictures of children. That's VERY concerning" -Isopod "Yeah, the adults in this aren't very reliable" -Me, all knowing.
"COUNT DOOKU WHAT'RE YOU DOING HERE?!" -Dog upon hearing DiZ.
I then let the two do a few chores for munny. Dog does the Cargo Climb, and Isopod the Mail Delivery.
After a short while, I could hear them bemoan doing the same thing over and over; then I say 'yeah- you don't have to collect the full amount, you can go now', which fills the conversation with relief.
"Oh my god Roxas is hallucinating now" - Isopod "I think his friends are gaslighting him" -Dog upon the Pickpocket scene.
The Namine scenes had some interesting reactions:
"Why is there a GIRL braking into his room?!" -Isopod "Puberty is sometimes like that" -Dog
"That is a note an adult leaves when they want to kidnap children." -Dog upon reading Hayner's note "Yeah, I wouldn't trust it" -Isopod. "is she a Jojo???" -Isopod Dog then imitates Dio -during Namine's meeting with Roxas where she freezes time.
Then, in the Dive to the Heart, Isopod picks Attack, and Dog picks Defence. Isopod is able to beat Twilight Thorn straight away, but Dog takes two attempts.
The Fourth day is where everything fell apart. The tournament was easy, and neither struggled against Hayner or Vivi. Then came along Axel.
Isopod beat Axel fairly quickly. I thought they'd struggle, but they didn't. Dog, however struggled. I noticed that when he attacked Axel after parrying or blocking, Axel would retaliate- I told him what I saw, but Dog complained 'I can't attack him otherwise'. It took Dog going from Crit to Proud to beat Axel. "Wow Golden, you're cruel to put a new player on the hardest difficulty" you say, and you would be right, but Dog typically loves very hard games, and boasts that it took him 8 solid hours to beat a boss in Eldren Ring and that 'it was awesome', so I suggested Crit to him.
When Axel was beaten, Dog was VERY tired of Kingdom Hearts, and actively tried his best to dislike it, talking bad about the combat and how 'you're locked into an action'. Isopod did not share this, and was enjoying her time. I could tell that Dog wanted this done, but I urged them forward because they were nearing the finale of the prologue.
They did the wonders, made fun of Roxas' friends gaslighting him into thinking he didn't fall off the clocktower, and they both beat Axel fairly easily second go around. They then made fun of Sora's shoes for 5 minutes straight, and ended the session.
-
It was fun seeing people's first reactions to KHII. Dog's reaction was nothing new to me, as I knew this wouldn't be his favourite, and is only playing so me and Isopod play Eldenring. I'm hoping in the future, he'll warm up to it. Isopod is enjoying her time with the game, which is good to hear.
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amatres ¡ 5 months ago
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Little directory for my blog! I'm Ama, a freelance artist with a lot of free time. My Art blog is : @amasdoodles My Curse of Strahd blog made to avoid spoiling my fellow players is: @patrina-velikovna My Ko-fi is: Here My Bluesky is: @ amatres My Pillowfort is: amatres
Commonly Used Tags: -#ama mumbles: for just my random text posts -#ama doodles: my tag for my own art -#others art: to categorize artwork from other people. usually used for fellow digital artists; traditional art sometimes is also labeled, or solely labeled as, #traditional art
most other tags are very self explanatory. Check out #art commissions if you are looking for artists commission, or even my own commission page!
I usually blog about my dnd characters as well, my currently active dnd pcs are: -#aurora, my winter fey druid with the homebrew subclass Circle of Visions from Feywild Companion. Recently made a campaign tag which is #dnd: convergent destiny. Been playing her since 2022, the setting is Wildmount from Critical Role. -#gwynnever/#ainsel: My swashbuckler rogue changeling, their true name is Ainsel while their false identity is a sea elf named Gwynnever. Here's a very long post about them. Their campaign tags are #what lies beneath the waves and #dnd: wlbtw. I have been playing them since 2022, the setting is a homebrew world of my dm's creation. He plans to release the setting at some point, I'll link when he does! -#carmilla, my dusk elf wizard with the Blood Mage subclass from Taldorei Reborn. I have been playing her since 2024, the setting is Curse of Strahd though heavily modified.
For a more extensive list of my characters: go here
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smokeydusk ¡ 1 year ago
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Grabbing her dick (↑↑↓↓←→←→) then pinching her nipples (BA) before hitting her prostate (Start)
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miyamiwu ¡ 11 months ago
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Me: Seriously, does anybody still use this Chat format? The font is so ugly.
Ghost in my room: The font looks like the one they use on drama scripts, so it’s fine.
Me: But the thinness of the letters unbolded and the lack of spacing between each speaker make this format difficult to read, especially when the text is long.
Me: Before the NPF post editor was a thing, the Chat format served a purpose. It used to be that theme editors can easily format the Chat post to look like actual chat messages on their themes
Examples:
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Dusk and Sempiternal by @ cactusthemes
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Space Race by @ laurenashpole
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Discord by @ starlightthemes
Me: Now, with custom Tumblr themes and the username.tumblr.com view being sidelined as a way to push users to the Tumblr mobile app and shove ads in their faces, theme-makers are less motivated to give the Chat format any fancy styling. That, or maybe it’s just not possible to make it fancy because of how NPF works. Idk, I don’t code.
Ghost: I see your point, but I think the Chat format is still handy for short text
Ghost: Like this
Ghost: or this
Ghost: People don’t really use it for long text
Me: True
Me: I still hate the Courier font, though
Me: It looks fine on print but not really on a screen
Me: May I propose a different monospace font?
Me: Like the lovely Roboto Mono or perhaps Source Code Pro?
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8bitsupervillain ¡ 5 months ago
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When the PS2 Mod of the 2009 Higurashi Cry Ch. 8 Matsuribayashi pt. 92
Matsuribayashi, as well as the rest of the series was ported over to various other consoles. The first seven chapters got ported to the PS2, PS3, PS4, PS Vita, Nintendo DS, and Nintendo Switch in addition to the PC originals. Matsuribayashi meanwhile was excluded from the PS2 release in favor of a different final chapter. Initially my intention was to give each of these console versions a try if only primarily to see what the difference might have been translation wise. Since these console ports never saw release outside of Japan they would invariably have to just be fan-translated, but alas I overestimated the lengths fan translators and the fandom would go to for the series. I don’t blame them, as you may have noticed Matsuribayashi is a beast and a half, I can only imagine how long the effort to translate the game would take. Looking at the release dates of the new translations on Steam and GOG there is roughly a year between releases, and that’s people whose job it is to translate all of this text. So I think it’s understandable that the fan who isn’t getting paid for their Herculean efforts might not want to bother, especially when there are at minimum two perfectly fine translations right there for you to enjoy on your computer. Because let’s be honest, you wouldn’t play the DS version of Higurashi on an actual DS, you’d emulate it.
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One of the interesting things about the DS ports of Higurashi is how the game divvies up the actual gameplay. The characters and backgrounds are on the top (left) screen, and the dialogue is on the touch screen. Another fascinating thing it does is that it takes a page from the way the game Hotel Dusk handled its gameplay/dialogue by making you hold your DS sideways like a small book. You just tap on the screen to advance the plot, choose fragments in the Connecting Fragments, and so on. The other console versions I can only speculate on, as nowhere has the roms available, and a lack of translation made me feel like it was a moot point regardless.
To sate my curiosity I went and had a search around to see if anyone had made any sort of translation of the series back around 2004. Well before Matsuribayashi, sure, but you never know what a fan-translation of Onikakushi might yield. This too ended up cold, the earliest English translation of Higurashi I could find started with the MangaGamer efforts in 2009. That I could find anyway, perhaps there’s a fan-translation hiding out there somewhere that was made in 2005 or so.
One of the amusing things about the 2009 to 2010 MangaGamer translations, in addition to the fact you can’t get them officially any more, is the fact that most of ones that are available for the most part use the PS2 graphics.
Obviously I’m not going to do a complete playthrough of 2009 version of Matsuribayashi and post it here. As much as I’m sure you’d love to see another ninety parts. There will be posts about it sure, but it’s going to be some of the more important scenes as well as me mentioning minor translation differences between the versions.
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I mentioned it way back towards the start of this chapter but I find it kind of interesting how each version of Matsuribayashi has its own variations on the names of the punishments the children at the orphanage get. You can sort of tell with the 2009 translation here this was meant to be a more literal translation of the source material, rather than something that tries to make it a more palatable read for Westerners.
Regardless the escape from the orphanage plays out similarly to the way it did earlier in the playthrough, only this time around the mysterious voice that communicates to Miyoko is missing. Thus making it seem even more like straightforward divine intervention led her to the phone booth.
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I find that these scenes involving Takano talking about Irie behind his back are actually quite more venomous in tone than the way the later translations handle it. That’s actually something I couldn’t help but notice looking at the PS2 sprites in this version of the game compared to later variations, there’s a lot more angry or annoyed looks with the sprites. I don’t know why they redid them and removed them in the version that was used as the basis for the 07th-Mod, perhaps they somehow lost access to the PS2 versions of the games and just had to redo them.
Some small translation differences I noticed between the 2009 versions and the later 2015-2020 versions are somewhat minuscule. With the original translation they do the regular thing where the characters go Family name, Given name. Houjou Satoko, instead of Satoko Houjou for instance. But later translations flip them around, now this just comes down to personal preference, but I don’t particularly mind if they switch it to Satoko Houjou from Houjou Satoko. But having read and played thousands of Japanese games and so forth I’m kind of more used to the Last name First Name, naming scheme. It’s not the end of the world, and I don’t think it’s really worth making that much of a fuss over.
Also I mentioned I’m not doing another in-depth synopsis of the entire chapter again. But another difference between the 2009 and the current translations is they called it the Connecting Pieces section. They still refer to them as Fragments, but the name of the section was changed.
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Another change was the name of the Mountain Dogs. In addition to being called the Mountain Hounds in the 2009 translation, later parts of the chapter gives the members of the Hounds names and not their bird-based callsigns. It doesn’t make much difference in the slightest, but it is in fact one.
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There’s not much difference in the translation of this fragment. I don’t recall in the version I read the first time if she railed against the stupidity of the common man or not. I do know that she didn’t refer to him as Father Koizumi though, so that was an odd choice to go with originally.
The conversation with Nomura occurs more or less the same as it did in the 07th-Mod, there wasn’t any particularly noteworthy deviations in the translation. It’s slightly more stilted, the dialogue and text in the 2009 version of the game and I can see why they felt the need to give it another once over later on.
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Something I find interesting about this variation of the conversation about Hanyu’s past is the fact that Rika says that she’s “still too young” compared to the later translations “she hasn’t had enough training.” It’s an interesting and deliberate change from the original translation.
Also you may or may not have noticed but they changed their spelling of Hanyu between versions, adding the extra U to her name in the newer translation. Something similar happens with Rena, they change it from Ryugu in the 2009 version to Ryuugu in the 2015+ translation. I don’t remember off hand if I had the presence of mind to screenshot them calling her Ryugu Rena in the PS2 version of the mod or not. Or if I caught any of the times Mion refers to herself as Uncle Mion instead of this old man.
There’s a part coming up when I talk about the anime adaptation of Matsuribayashi that throws some rather unnecessary confusion onto the matter about Hanyu and her people. Also the anime calls her Hanyuu. I’m trying to keep the spellings consistent with the version I’m presently talking about.
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I don’t know why, but the "the" in front of Oyashiro-sama there just bugs me. This is from the scene where Akasaka, Ooishi, Kumagai, and the forensics scientist meet up, and Akasaka asks about the various deaths that occurred around Watanagashi.
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I know it runs counter to the message of the chapter, but honestly just straight up killing Takano before Watanagashi would probably solve Rika’s problems.
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I don’t think I screenshotted them in the PS2 version, but the 2009 version of Matsuribayashi lacks Ooishi’s distinctive laugh. It’s just a na ha ha ha, and not the nfu fu fu. I guess I should also point out that even though it’s a modded version of the 2009 original there is no voice acting with the PS2 sprites. I don’t know if that’s because there wasn’t any voice acting back then period, or if it was just they only ripped the sprites for the mod.
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loominggaia ¡ 7 months ago
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Something about Zeffer
Just some notes about Zeffer I was thinking about.
(The following text contains MAJOR SPOILERS for future stories!)
As stated in this post, Zeffer dies in the upcoming story "For Goodness Sake". His own escalating madness becomes his downfall, driving him to attack Lily in order to goad Evan into killing him. But in an unexpected turn of events, Lily actually defends herself for once, thanks to Alaine's training "Pig Bait". She is forced to kill Zeffer in order to protect herself, and this haunts her for a long time afterwards.
She does eventually work through her grief during her time with the Karenzans. Her relationship with Zeffer was highly complicated, because he was her savior as well as her abuser, and some of that abuse was not his fault because Dario forced him to do it. Lily claims she "loved" Zeffer, but the nature of that love isn't clear. Romantic? Platonic? It's probably not even clear to her.
Despite how he terrorized her towards the end, Lily forgives Zeffer, recognizing that he had good intentions but was deeply tortured by his own sickness. After losing her own mind and trying to resurrect Dario, she really comes to understand how trauma can make good people do despicable things.
In "The Aldfog Mystery", Zeffer becomes an unrecognized hero when he slays every major vampire clan in Noalen. The only vampires left after that are small gangs and lone stragglers, which are easily controlled by the Evangeline and Folkvar guards. No one realizes that Zeffer was responsible for this until many years later, when Lily makes it known.
She does not want Zeffer to be remembered for the crimes he committed in his state of sickness. She wants the world to remember him for the bravery and selflessness in his heart, and the good deeds he did in order to make the world a better place.
Because that truly was what Zeffer intended. He grew up in a rough, violent area that was oppressed by vampires and suffered depression because of it. He took inspiration from Evan and decided to put his vampirism to good use, by using it to eradicate other vampires, instead of succumbing to his bloodlust and joining their oppressive ranks, or simply taking his own life.
When the Karenzans create the Etherean territory of Azizaland, Lily contributes Zeffer's name to its history books, describing him as a benevolent hero. He is the reason that Azizaland (formerly Taybiya) is no longer terrorized by vampires, including the ones who victimized her. Zeffer is the reason she is alive and cured of her own vampirism. Despite his flaws, he made a tremendously noble sacrifice on her behalf by giving up his own mortality to restore hers.
He did this not because he loved her or expected anything in return, but because it was simply the righteous thing to do. Zeffer despised all the corruption around him, so he rebelled against it with honesty and goodness. He knew someone in this crime-riddled shithole had to make a change, so he started with himself. That's pretty darn commendable.
The Ethereans love statues (Karenza is a sculptor, after all) and use them to commemorate benevolent entities. There are statues all over Azizaland, everywhere you turn, depicting beauty and heroism. Wicked beings do not get statues. So, Lily sees to it that Zeffer gets his own statue in Azizaland's grand palace--which was once the Dusk's castle.
His effigy stands guard over the courtyard for ages, watching as this once hellish city becomes a place of healing and benevolence. That is all he ever wanted: for Taybiya to be a better place, for Gaia to be a better place, and for everyone to be happy and fulfilled in life.
Karenzans often meditate at his statue, as it reminds them never to succumb to dark temptations, and to keep fighting against darkness no matter the odds. It empowers them with the will to stay righteous-hearted in the face of cruelty and wickedness.
RIP Zeffer. :( Gaia knows you weren't a perfect man, but you were a real Good Guy.
*
Questions/Comments?
Lore Masterpost
Read the Series
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elysianasterism ¡ 8 months ago
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now that the lyrics project is complete what was your thought process for all the designs?? 👀 been wanting to ask but wanted to wait till you finished
well well well (i'll do it by song)
Pisara meressä: i wanted an informal vibe, like it's gotta be obvious that it was just written down in a notebook. just to reference the lyric Voit vetää hommat vihkoon but like. literally. so the cursive is just how i would normally write cursive, and the pencil sketch is retained. and the water drop below the P of the title lyric was there from the initial designs
Tuhoaisti: based off the käärijä logo font! it's not bold tho. i wanted to get the sense of destruction across visually. one of the easiest to make imo
Aaveisiin: based off courier. i wanted a vintage vibe with the typeface so i went with this slab serif font. it's all meant to be minimalistic. the window at the bottom is like. where the former lover or smth could look through. and the eyes are for that feeling of being watched. one of my faves
Suuren päivän ilta: i wanted a neon sign vibe, and considering the instrumentals, i wanted smth sleek and sans-serif. so it's somewhat based off this font (the all-caps one). and the doodles are based off the lyrics too. i made it red since it does get mentioned in the song (punasiin käytäviin), tho i also associate red with tuhoaisti and täydellisin. also i ditched my first work of it, and now i use the scrap paper to test color combos
Täydellisin: kinda hard at first, since spi was red and this was also very much red to me. and idk at first what font since i didn't want it to look like spi but i still wanted the neon sign vibes, and also somehow incorporate the seductive vampire imagery. that's when i found the font linked above (i used the cursive one here). i tried to make it glow but ehh... the double lines work i guess?? and the nearest i had to red that was neon was pink
Satama: based off the font kuumaa uses in their pubmats (which u posted recently). because of the modern sound of the instrumental, i wanted smth sans-serif but not as sleek as the spi font. the ship and fence are related to harbors, and the clock is a reference to both the ticking sound throughout the song and the promo videos for it. (it's even set at 1:00! 12 and 1! like in the promo!)
Loppujen lopuks: colors are based off this one poster i made for the song some time ago (it's on IG and the kuumaa fans discord). i wanted to make the text more rounded, and with more lines, but it wouldn't fit in the spaces. the stars are also based on the poster. mostly vibes-based from the instrumental since the lyrics themselves are not very visual imo. another of my faves
Valmiit: based off garamond font, since i wanted a serif font. to match the graduation vibes. same with the colors and the graduation/student caps. the train is mentioned in that very lyric too
Kerran sadassa vuodessa: my literal handwriting. sky blue, but not the light blue of pisara meressä, since it's cloudy. the birds and the heart are based off the lyrics, and the grass is just vibes
Tässä on kaikki: sunny!! i wanted a big font, i played around with some rounded ones but i couldn't get the spacing right. the teal is from the mix of blue and yellow. i thought the double lines make it more fun, as well as the wind. the bus is, well, supposed to represent a tourbus. the song has great roadtrip vibes in general
Luotan tulevaan: i wanted the flowiest script, but that wouldn't fit the page! and in glitter pen yellow gold so it's glowy like an actual streetlamp. and the lyrics are meant to be surrounded by a streetlamp too. tbh i also associate this song with blue (and dusk) but i feel like that's too much blue already (and i wanted to use it for yyl)
Yks yÜ lainaa: i had some more intricate fonts in mind, but i settled for this one that's similar to the täydellisin one but less cursive. the cleanliness reminds me of some poster fonts and i think that's really nice. dark blue since it's about night, but glitter gold too since i associate it more with this song. the couple is running in the park they sneaked into in the lyrics. it's got the colors of each kuumaa album! probably my fave of them all
overall: my original plan was to do the title of each song in the center, surrounded by lyrics everyone suggested. but i'm bad at layouts. and it felt like too much work, especially with my college stuff alongside everything. i also thought of putting stickers or photos, but that would mean buying more stuff. even if i'm not as fond of those i did for some of my fave songs, i'm alright with how it turned out! tbh i did all this for the 6 month anniversary of pisara meressä
i'm planning to do this too with jo3 after it releases 😉
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fluffalpenguin ¡ 2 years ago
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IT'S HERE AT LAST @arcvmonth AU DAY YEAHHHH never mind that this post is late
I managed to stuff 10 AUs into this bad boy, so this is a image AND text heavy post, be warned! (I genuinely hope you enjoy the ride)
Not arranged in any particular order, and hyperlinks lead to doodles I've posted on Twitter unless stated otherwise!
(CW: imagery of drug use in the first one and mentions of violence in another)
1. Triad AU
It's the 1800s and everybody* does crimes! (*Not everyone)
Raised in the Fusion Society from an early age, Serena has always had mixed feelings about the child trafficking that her foster father's involved in. One day, she comes across a red-haired street performer that brings dazzling smiles of unbridled joy to children and decides to cut ties with her current life. As she eludes the men sent to retrieve her, she runs into who but the leader of a rival organisation, the Lancers!
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This holds the distinction of being the only au that I didn't include pawn in some way or another because I can't figure out where to fit Yugo in (probably why my interest in it has somewhat fizzled out already lmao)
I wrote a short ~500 words fic of Serena announcing her departure to Dennis, Sora, and Yuri (conceptually the latter perpetually seethes about her audacity throughout the length of this au because that's funny)
2. Vampire Knight AU
Vampires and humans learning to co-exist in a boarding school is a genius set-up, thank you Hino Matsuri for giving me undying brainrot (pun intended) through creating this (albeit cursed) manga
Turned into a vampire against his will during a brutal massacre, Yugo curses his fate to be a blood-sucking monster every waking hour. And if his life didn't suck hard enough already, he's also forced to partner with (be the research subject of) a human with a set of morals worse than the most depraved vampire he's ever met. At least that lessens his guilt about drinking blood, because if anyone deserves to be a juice box, it's that smug purple-headed bastard! Life at the academy revolves around humans attending Day classes and vampires attending Night classes, but Yugo begs the headmaster to allow him some semblance of normalcy (denial) by letting him attend the Day Class, in which he dozes off often. Luckily, his roommate, Yuto, is there to poke him awake just enough times for him to pass his classes. Like his cousin Yuri, Yuto is also paired with a vampire through the latter's term in the academy. As one of the last surviving pure-bloods in the world, Yuya is uncomfortably used to his fellow vampires looking at him with undiluted reverence while fending off dubious intentions. The two quickly form a close relationship, a stark contrast to the other two boys that they share a house with.
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I'm still deciding between having Yuri and Yuya being seatmates or not because both have their pros and cons (Also Yoko is a human, but is also the Night Class teacher; Yuya takes a liking to her pretty quickly)
Yuto, Shun, and Kaito are part of the school's Disciplinary Squad made out of vampire hunters-in training that patrol the grounds after dusk (to make sure their vampiric classmates aren't running around charming guileless humans into being supper) and Yuri, of course, despite being human has asked his beloved Papa for permission to attend Night Class in order to observe his research subjects in their natural habitat! (He unnerves everyone, but they don't disturb him because the last time someone tried they learnt first-hand that he has an taser whip to protect himself)
3. OCG AU
I've recently posted (how recent is recent?) a compilation post of doodles for this AU then I realised I never talked about the plot so
Childhood friends Yuto, Shun, and Ruri are training hard to join the elite ranks of the Dogmatikan Order. When Ruri doesn't return from her Ascension ceremony, the two defy sect rules to search for her. Yuto comes across a mysterious red-headed boy incarcerated within the inner confines of the Order's keep and...
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I know it doesn't look like it but pawn is more of a background ship in this story, counterpart and swift take center stage (because Yuto and Rin are the main characters to me)
When I cooked this up in 2021, I was so desperate to escape from my schoolwork that I ended up making an 15+ chapter outline, here's an excerpt
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(Just kidding I do have half a prologue and one chapter written out, one day I'll revisit this for sure)
Oh also, Yuri and Yuya are twins separated at birth
4. Exorcist AU
This one is the multi-series AU, because everyone has one, right!
This started as my 2022 Halloween pawn piece and then over a five-hour midnight bus ride at midnight two months later I decided to make a bad decision that led me to dozing off while queuing up in a theme park in the middle of the afternoon
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(Yuto's design is so horribly outdated but I haven't digitalised his new one yet sorry, also shark and kaito heads are by @2-ennn)
In a world ravaged by demons, Yugo has spent his entire life on the tiny island he's called home learning the ropes of exorcism. His life is shaken up when he's assigned to show a visitor around, an exorcist from the mainland with a devilish smile that raises his hackles. He finally drops his suspicions and guard when Joeri sustains injuries protecting him from a demonic attack, and the two become closer... (They even have cute fluffy dates) Well, only until Joeri reveals that it was all staged and that he's a demon (and that his name is actually Yuri) before making off with the church's most prized weapon/artifact/thing/sorry I haven't really decided yet
If you saw my tweet from last year complaining about how I have to write 7 chapters first before I can write about my otp kissing I was referring to this au (joke's on my past self because I skipped ahead to write it anyway)
Yubel, Placido, and IV are the respective leaders of the three factions, but the island that Yugo (and Rin) grew up on is managed by Sherry because man am I hungry for Sherry Yugo sibling-like interactions
I love this AU, but writer's block crashes down like a brick (I've attempted to rewrite Chapter 1 more than two times and I'm still pulling my hair out because I need it to be Perfect)
5. DGS AU
What's up Ace Attorney fans, do I have a fangame in the works for you! It's based on The Great Ace Attorney/Daigyakuten Saiban, but there's no spoilers for it if you haven't played it
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I can't talk too much about the plot since I do want to make a playable version one day but I will say that the first trial is defending Yugo from a murder charge (lol)
It's also one of the rare AUs where there's barely any explicit romance(?), only murder and mystery here! (you bet I'm going to write so many allusions for my favourite ships though winky face)
I started writing trial scripts for this but then I got really overwhelmed when looking for a good AA game maker so if anyone has recommendations please send them my way (Ideally they'd have the DGS UI...)
6. Casino AU
The Yuboys are dealers in a casino, and maybe it's a fun goofy little vn (it's a vn)
I have a whole thread on twitter for this one for the drawings i've made, but I'll post some on here so I can ramble a little
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It started out as a concept for gacha cards, but then became its own monster (that's currently slumbering)
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Originally Reiji was the owner of the casino, but I'm trying my best to include Ray and Zarc more into my aus when I can because I just want more excuses to write/draw my trophy wife (zarc)
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this drawing is so old but clutches head i love u4 so much rrrrrrr
I wanted to make little acrylic standees back then (honestly still do a little)
Speaking of little acrylic standees...
7. Rune Factory AU
This one is roughly based on Rune Factory 5, but all you need to know is... nothing, actually; I can't even reference the plot because I've barely played the game myself lol but i just really wanted fantasy farming yuboys
(and then none of the characters ended up being vegetable farmers, even outside of the yuboys)
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Harvest Moon/Rune Factory is a game where you live on a farm and eventually maybe marry someone, so one day when I've done all of the full body sprites (pauses and looks to the horizon) I want to make a uquiz that tells you who your destined Bachelor/ette is
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It'd be one of the AUs without any 'canon' ships but Ray and Zarc's backstories are kinda tied together so... yup anyway here's a list of things that are true in this AU:
yuya zarc siblings and zarc is a mean older brother
i was going to make zarc the cool mysterious guy that you rarely see but gap moe is one hell of a drug
yuzu and her dad own the grocery store, yuya helms the local inn with yoko, who manages the baths within, zarc opens his diner for business when he feels like it (he's actually so good at cooking), yugo and rin are a blacksmith/carpenter duo, kurosakis have a bakery, though ruri spends her time playing detective, yuto runs the local clinic and sawatari is the town mascot
every monday night, a mysterious phantom thief with orange hair stalks the streets!
the squad that reiji captains serves to fix problems like monster infestations, but they usually have a lot of free time on their hands (well, not reiji) so yuri is constantly annoying yugo and yuto for fun and serena spends her time befriending the girls
ray only returns to town and opens up her flower shop when you defeat the 2nd boss and yuri can be found loitering there often, ray is the only person that makes him remotely uncomfortable
i was going to make yuto the 'protagonist' with amnesia (it's a RF thing) but then i was told he'd be funnier as a doctor (and now I can also give him glasses)
8. Gunvolt AU
Azure Striker Gunvolt is a fast-paced 2D action sidescr-- okay you know what, all you have to know is that the yuboys are villains belonging to a mega corporation that aims to control society through the power of virtual idols and music (yes, this is a real plot point from the original work) and Serena storms their hideout to kick their asses in order to truly free Yuzu (who escaped and was found unconscious in an alley by her now gf) from their clutches
Yuuri: Well, well. Maybe today won't be boring, after all. Serena: Is… Is he in a straitjacket?  Yuuri: I'd really appreciate it if you didn’t talk about me like that to my face, thank you. Serena: If I did, would you move out of the way? Yuuri: If I did, would you free me of these restraints? Rin: That doesn’t seem to be the wisest thing to do. Serena: Yeah. Dream on. Yuuri: Then we only have one choice left, don’t we?
(Yeah I put him in a straitjacket)
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The grey numbers are for the design notes I wrote alongside when drawing this, here's a pastebin! (It's not required reading, but I would deeply appreciate it if you checked my rambling out)
Reiji is the final boss for some light AkaSere, but I'm still figuring out his character (and everyone elses', tbh)
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The main fun of this AU for me was definitely making parodies of the skill cut-ins! (Yuri's one is due for a remake... I also really need to get around to finishing Yuto and start on Yugo's to complete the set)
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Yuya's second one is for when you beat his first form and he uses his last resort to merge with the other three or something (His pose and cape is a nod to Astrograph!)
9. Obelisk Force AU
Okay, before you continue, go and get this song playing in the background first (I will give you a cookie if you read the lyrics too)
Okay, let's go! (with the energy of an excited tour guide)
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It'd be an absolute understatement to say I love the concept of Obelisk Force Yugo; one time I made a 10-minute TED talk trying to pick apart why I liked it so much, but back then I still didn't have a good grasp of what my ideal ObeFo Yugo/Pawn was... Until I came across that song on Spotify and asked a friend for help on brainstorming (lost if u see this HI) and the rest, as they say, was history
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Yugo is picked up (kidnapped) by Academia at an early age (think like, 5-6) after they witness his duelling skills (Leo really needs LOTS of child soldiers)
they erase his memories then for better assimilation into the academy, though he still retains a sense of stubborn individuality
he's constantly bullied by the other students for being an orphan from the Synchro Dimension, and he gets into fights often
eventually, Leo orders Yuri to take care of the matter (children will be children, but Academia MUST have order)
when Yuri approaches Yugo, he's just finished throwing hands against yet another crowd of students
Yuri attempts diplomacy, even challenging him to a duel, but Yugo is exhausted from his earlier fight and turns him down brusquely, stalking back to his room
Yuri attempts to block his way and gets shoved aside, falling to the ground and cracking his duel disk
he snaps, as the duel disk had been a gift from the professor, and how dare you?
he's beating Yugo half to death when a lightbulb goes off in his head
he proposes to Yugo to personally take charge of his education because he is so gracious and charitable and it's the least he could do for someone who shares his face
Yugo, of course, is completely dumbfounded but faints from a combination of blood loss and fatigue before he can reply no
when Yugo has recovered, Yuri pops the question again, and the two decide to settle the matter through a duel
Yugo loses (duh)
time flies as Yuri teaches Yugo how to stop students from coming back for revenge, among other things (it also helps that the other students are already creeped out by him) and significantly raises his quality of life at Academia which Yugo is thankful for
time skip! Yugo successfully joins the Obelisk Force and promptly unbuttons the jacket instantly (it's a tight fit, okay)
Yugo can feel his serpentine gaze drill into him from where Yuri sits cross-legged on a chair a distance away, his chin cradled thoughtfully in one hand. He waits for a comment, but nothing but silence comes. Finally, he mutters, "What, you're not going to scold me for desecrating the uniform?" A wide smile crinkles Yuri's face. "Not just your wardrobe, but even your vocabulary's upgraded, hm?" Before Yugo can form a retort, he goes on, "Actually, I think I like it." His chair barely makes a sound, muffled by the carpet as he stands up and makes his way across the room. The footsteps stop when teal and magenta are inches away. Lightly, he fingers the lapel of Yugo's new jacket as he rakes a half-lidded gaze from head-to-toe. "It makes you stand out from the others in the Force. And that's fitting. After all..." "You're not the Professor's. You're mine."
One day, Yuri and/or Yugo are sent to capture... Rin! Her picture gives Yugo a sense of deja vu, but he doesn't understand why...
Yugo's memories come back in a flood when he makes eye contact with his old childhood friend that he hasn't seen in almost a decade
The capture is successful, and back at Academia Yugo begs the Professor for the authority to be in charge of her incarceration (In trying to mold Yugo into his shadow, Yuri has unknowingly created a competitor for the Professor's acknowledgement)
Before the Professor can respond, a girl of Yugo's age steps into the room to report to the Professor as a fresh recruit
Leo introduces a brainwashed yandere Ruri as Rin's appointed jailer
Yeah that's right I managed to fit apple and swift in here thumbs up emoji
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Anyway it's now a romantic comedy with a love triangle (it's not)
10. Hades AU
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No deep thoughts nor any plans for this one it was more of a costume design exercise but I'm including it here because I still like them quite a bit
***
If you've actually made it this far, I don't know what to say... thank you!
If you'd like to see more of any of these (including some of the ones that I didn't manage to include but might have posted before like the Alice in Wonderland one, or the Dark Signer one, or the university one, or the Yuri half-turns into a Starve Venom dragon boy one, or the the Monster Hunter one (less of an AU and just a hey they are gaming), or the Z-arc suddenly has four toddlers and they are the yus and he has to juggle parenting and pro-duelling one, and whichever ones I might have forgotten, my ask box is open!! Again, thanks for reading!
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