#even if i did finish the project I'm not sure if i would ever post it on here

[its-captain-sir]

Never posted this here so I thought I'd take a minute and do that now!

(click for better quality)

About a year ago while I was playing spiritfarer for the first time, I had the idea to make an OC which ended up being a self insert character of sorts! I really wanted to explore some of the different mechanics of spiritfarer characters as applied to something based off myself (like their spirit form, their associated flower, activities and events they do on the boat, etc) and how a character like that might add their own story into the larger narrative of the game, as well just what that story would even be. There's a lot of screenshot edits and drawing ideas I had that were never finished, but here's a few of the more completed pieces or concept stuff I did!

The thing about self inserts is that they get, well, personal at times. maybe even a little too personal. And considering the nature of the game, it was a really heavy topic to think about at points, so I ended up stopping work on the project after a while. (I also had a few issues when it came to screenshot editing since I could not find the right font used in the game ANYWHERE which definitely did contribute to me choosing to set it aside) But I still really like the work I did do and it is very special to me, so I'm hoping that one day I'll be able to come back to it! :)

[wolfjackle-creates]

Bring Me Home Arc 3 Part 3

Again the winner of last week's poll! There won't be a poll this week because I'm planning something a bit different. I hit 1000 followers this past week and have been wracking my brain about how to celebrate! Wasn't up for doing prompts or adding more projects to my list, though, so I didn't want to go that route.

But I did come up with something that I think everyone will really enjoy. Especially those of you who have been voting for Carry Your Heart (I see you in the tags!). So look out for that post.

In addition, I've just posted the first chapter of Arc 2 on AO3! Link below.

Story Summary: Jack and Maddie install a new ghost shield on the house which activates the moment Danny tries to step into his home. His secret is out and his parents are determined to excise the ghost from their son.

Luckily Danny isn't alone. The Young Justice, Sam, Tucker, and Jazz aren't going to leave him to suffer.

Arc 1: AO3

Arc 2: AO3 (incomplete); Tumblr - First, Final

Arc 3: First, Previous

Word Count: 1.4k

-----

Fire rushing through him jolted Danny awake. His back arched as he cried out. He screwed his eyes tight, not wanting to see what torture his parents were going to come at him with next when he realized what the sound of his cry meant: the muzzle was gone.

As were the restraints. And he was lying on something soft. Trying hard not to hope, he opened his eyes.

Sam and Jazz were leaning over him, concern clear on their faces. They were in some sort of ambulance or van.

“How are you feeling,” demanded Sam.

Danny took a moment to answer, his chest was pure agony. He didn’t even want to think what it would feel like to sit up. And even past that, everything was sore. Though the fire that had woken him up had dissipated, the tell-tale feel of ecto-dejecto. “Pretty much the worst I’ve ever felt,” he answered honestly.

Sam and Jazz both winced and his sister grabbed his hand. He squeezed her fingers weakly.

At the foot of his bed stood Tim in full Red Robin getup and Kon as Superboy.

He couldn’t hold back the smile as he met Tim’s gaze. “You came,” he said.

Tim didn’t smile back, but some tension eased out of his shoulders. “I always will,” he said. “Been telling you that since we were ten years old.”

“I know. I’ve always known. Thank you.”

Jazz squeezed his hand again and he looked at her. “Red Robin and Superboy are going to take you away from here. Robin will help you recover.”

Sam nodded. “Yep. And the rest of us are gonna focus on making sure Amity is safe for ghosts once and for all.”

Danny shook his head. “I should be there with you guys, fighting.”

“Nope!” interrupted Jazz. “Not even a little. You’re going to focus on getting better, got it, Danny? That’s all we want from you.”

“But the ghosts—”

Sam covered his mouth with her hand. “Stop it right there. Tucker is working with Impulse and Wonder Girl to get the portal locked up. No one will be coming through. No one—ghost or human—will be in any danger while you’re gone. I promise.”

Danny slumped into the bed. Even the slight change in position caused waves of pain to radiate from his chest even through the healing ice he could feel implanted in his body. He whimpered and closed his eyes until the throbbing receded just a bit. “I trust you. I do, it’s just…”

“You’re used to taking care of everyone,” finished Jazz for him. “We know. So let us take care of you for a change. We love you, Danny.”

“Love you, too, Jazz. Sam.”

“Be good for bird-brain there, got it?” ordered Sam.

Danny gave her a half-smile. “Are Tim and I ever good together?”

She laughed. “Well, don’t burn down Gotham, capiche?”

“Capiche.”

“We have to go now,” said Jazz.

Danny gripped her hand tighter. “Don’t leave me.”

Jazz winced, but leaned down to kiss his forehead. “We need to make sure the Guys in White aren’t going to get involved further. And you need to get someplace safe.”

Danny huffed a half laugh. “Gotham is safe?”

Jazz rolled her eyes at his poor attempt at a joke. “For you it is. Now, I’m leaving Red and Superboy with a case full of ectoplasm for you and our entire supply of ecto-dejecto. I just gave you your first injection. Please try and eat something and drink your ectoplasm regularly.”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say, Jazz.”

Jazz sniffed and it was only then that Danny realized it was wetter than usual and her eyes were watery. He tried not to feel bad for his jokes when she replied, “Yes, it is whatever I say. Glad you agree.”

Sam cackled, and now that he was paying attention, Danny could hear the hysterical edge to it. “You’d better text us multiple times a day, ghost boy. Don’t try and lie to us, either. Kon’ll tell me the truth about your condition. And as soon as we can arrange it, we’re coming out your way for a visit.”

“Course I will, Sam. Give Tuck my best?”

“Duh. He wishes he could’ve come with us, you know.”

Danny nodded. “But he’s better with the tech stuff and that is just as time sensitive.”

“Yeah. Now, get some sleep,” Sam ordered. “You’ve got a long drive ahead of you.”

Danny gave the rote answer after too many all-nighters taking care of ghost attacks before school, “I’m dead, I don’t need sleep.”

His sister squeezed his hand. “Ghosts who just went through what you did need their sleep. Love you, Danny. Get well and I’ll see you soon.”

“Love you, Jazz.”

She kissed his forehead one more time, followed by Sam. And with another two rounds of farewells and love yous, he was alone with Tim and Kon.

“Thanks for coming,” he said again.

“Obviously we weren’t going to leave you there,” said Kon. “Being a lab subject isn’t fun. Especially not that kinda lab experiment.”

Danny couldn’t quite hold back the flinch at that description. It was accurate, but blunt.

Tim walked over until he was sitting by Danny’s bed. “Just listen to Jazz and get some rest. We’re going to be taking the long route to Gotham by going south to start. If we stop for food in a few hours, think you could handle a smoothie?”

Danny shrugged and bit back a yawn. “Could try.”

“That’s all I ask.”

Kon moved towards the front of the vehicle as well. “Looks like it’s time for us to skedaddle. I’ll keep the road from jostling you, ghost-boy.”

Danny gave a small smile and let his eyes close. As he did, he tried to mumble his thanks and he hoped it came across.

---

The next time he woke was more gentle. Someone was tapping on his shoulder and calling his name. But even so, as he was pulled closer to awareness, the pain made itself more and more known. He tried to cling to the darkness, but the tapping wasn’t stopping, nor was the person calling him.

He blinked open his eyes to see Tim’s concerned face. He wasn’t wearing the domino anymore, or his costume. Just a sweatshirt and jeans.

“Hey, Danny,” said Tim. “I’m going to need you to try and eat a bit right now. Kon got us those smoothies I mentioned. I’ve also got yogurt if that’ll be easier for you. But the smoothie will have more nutrients.”

Danny closed his eyes. He wasn’t hungry and didn’t want to eat. Why did Tim have to bring him back to consciousness for this? He hurt and just wanted to sink back into oblivion.

The tapping on his shoulder began again. “I know, Danny. But you have to eat something. And you should take some ectoplasm, too. So just stay awake for a few minutes.”

“Mm ‘wake,” said Danny without opening his eyes. He shifted his weight, hoping to push himself up to eat, only to scream in pain as his chest protested any movement.

“Shit! Don’t move,” said Tim too late. “I’ve got a spoon here. I’ll feed it to you, okay? So just stay exactly where you are.”

Danny gripped his sheets, unable to do anything else as wave after wave of pain over took him. Tim kept up a litany of reassurances and stroked his hair. Eventually, Danny was able to think past it again.

“Don’t think I can sit up,” said Danny.

“Of course not,” agreed Tim. He held a styrofoam cup between his knees and carefully took off the lid and straw. “Just let me. Take at least a few bites. Swallow as is, don’t try and chew. Just do what you can, okay?”

“Okay,” agreed Danny and Tim fed him the first bite.

Danny hated this. Hated it so much. Here he was being spoon fed like a baby all because his parents… He shut his eyes and took the next bite. He wasn’t going to finish that thought. Tim was here and that’s what mattered.

Danny wasn’t sure how much he ate, but it couldn’t have been much. His eyelids were getting heavier and heavier and the pull of oblivion stronger.

“Wait, Danny. Stay awake just a little longer, okay?”

Danny groaned but forced his eyes open again.

Tim showed him a bottle of ectoplasm. “Just a few swallows of this, too. Okay?”

He didn’t want to. He’d rather just go to sleep again, but he opened his mouth obediently. By the time he finished his third spoonful, he couldn’t fight it anymore and slumped into the bed. The pain receded back into blackness for a time.

-----

Next

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Danny is going to be getting all the comfort throughout this. All of them will, tbh. Because no one is happy and they all need a hug or five.

Let me know what you think!

[marleyybluu]

Truth or Drink 2

Pedro x fem!reader

WC: 1.4k

omg not her posting another Pedro one after she said she wouldn't for a while... not sorry

Same spots. Same interview but under different circumstances. The makeup artist added the finishing touches to your face. Pedro was in awe of you as usual like a smitten kitten, love was written all over his face. You could feel it, you didn't even have to ask if he was looking at you. "Stop looking at me like that."

"Like what?" He innocently shrugged. You rolled your eyes.

The two of you were invited back for another segment of Truth or Drink but this time it was no movie promotion, though you two had separate projects going on, this was about your blossoming relationship. Since the last interview, you and Pedro had finally confessed your feelings to each other and it'd been a blissful ride ever since.

A whole year of surprise dates, endless compliments and kisses, whenever he touched you it made bumps form on your skin as if every time was the first. You too had never loved anyone the way you loved Pedro, you would do anything for him and you made sure he knew that. The makeup was done and soon it was time to record, you were a bit more nervous for this one because the crew had told you guys these questions would be different.

"You guys ready?"

"As always," Pedro answered. The cameraman counted down and pointed for you two to begin, but neither of you said anything. "Am I doing it first this time?" You asked. "By all means."

You blushed and looked at the camera. "Hello, I am YN YLN and this is my... boyfriend Pedro Pascal-" He uttered a giggle and covered his mouth soon after. You laughed hiding behind your hands, this interview might be more chaotic than the last one.

"What do you guys notice about this interview?"

"We didn't have to write our own questions." You answered. "We have pulled questions from various sources. Instagram, Twitter and even people you two are close to."

Pedro playfully frowned. "Shit."

"Same rules apply. You ask, you either say the truth or drink, and you can go ahead with a starter shot."

Pedro picked the drink this time, pouring his and about to pour yours until you stopped him. "Can I have this one, please? I asked them to get me this one." You politely informed pointing to the bottle in the middle. He shrugged pouring your shot and closing back the bottle before placing it back with the others, just like the last time you raised your glasses with a little nod and, "Salud." Once your drinks were down you asked the first question. "Where did you take me on our first date?"

Easy.

He became giggly all over again. "So, you've always said that you hate restaurants as a first date, too bland, too formal, so I booked out an entire arcade for the both of us and we were in there for hours."

You proudly nodded. "Best date ever."

"Good, I'm glad." He blushed. It was his turn to ask. He cleared his throat. "Do we have any pet names for each other?"

You winked. "You love my pet names. I call you Pedrito, Pookie, baby, love... papi Pascal." And judging by his reaction, that might be his favourite one. "My names for her are in Spanish though. So I'll call her mi amor, mi corazon, bébé... I think I'm missing one."

"Cariño." You added. "Oh yeah, she's my cariño."

You leaned back in your chair reading the next question. "What do you like about me, physically? Oh lord." Pedro rubbed his hands together and laughed menacingly, you hid behind your cards knowing he'll say the obvious answer. "Your boobs."

"Alright, interview over."

"No, no, no... relaaax." He played along. "I mean I do like your boobs, but, your eyes do it for me. They're so big and pretty and wondrous, they allow me to look into such a kind loving soul that puts up with me and my antics."

You pouted. "Aww,"

"Boobs are a close second though." He added. "I love your smile the most. When you smile or laugh your eyes close and it's the cutest fucking thing, your entire face lights up too and I could just squish you." You cooed.

You two continued your string of questions, so far nothing was asked that made you want to drink but you still took shots in between for entertainment and the fact that it's free liquor who was passing that up? The first round of questions, you were informed, were mostly from fans and that this round was from close friends and family so it was definitely about to get risqué. You sighed. "Do you think we have enough sex?"

Pedro beamed. "I think we may have too much for people with such busy schedules."

"Are you guys saying you do it whenever and wherever you can?"

You two nodded. "Have you ever done it at a movie premiere or something?"

He reached for the bottle and poured, both of your attempts at keeping a straight face were slowly failing, until you let out a snort that triggered Pedro's. You clinked glasses before taking the shot. "Do you think we'd last if we got married?" Pedro asked. You scrunched up your face, what a ridiculous question. "Of course. You are the most caring and kind person I've ever met, the way you treat me is insane, I've never had anyone love me the way you do," Your voice broke and your eyes burned, you fanned your face and giggled nervously. "Got me crying on camera and shit."

Pedro reached over grabbing your free hand, soothing you by caressing the back of your hand with his thumb. "You know I love you, mama."

"I know." You pouted. "I love you so much."

"I love you so much more." You rolled your eyes gently hitting his arm with the cards, he always had to get the last 'I love you.' He flashed that cute smile that made you melt 100 times over. "Come here," You didn't take even a second thought before getting up to sit on his lap, you rested your head on top of his while he held you close. "How long did it take you guys to say I love you?" One of the crew asked. "Three months," Pedro chuckled. "Truthfully I wanted to say it sooner."

You nodded. "Me too."

Last question. You had a surprise that came with this one. "Are you excited to be a new dad?"

The question didn't really register just yet. "Of course I am. I can't wait for us to start a family one day, and to have another cute face to wake up to. I mean I think maybe I'd wait until I could take a break and then that way I could spend all my time taking care of... wait."

It hit. "Am I excited to be a new dad? But we don't... you're not..."

Pedro bit his lip. "Are you pregnant?"

You reached into your back pocket and pulled out a folded picture of your first ultrasound. He broke. "YN... you're joking."

"I am not," You leaned in and pointed to the little dot. "That little peanut is ours."

Pedro sat speechless which was a rare occasion for him, he took the picture in his hand really trying to comprehend that he assisted in creating another life, that in just nine short months he'd get the one thing he deeply craved, that he yearned for. His own family.

He smiled as a tear slipped from his eye. You wiped it away kissing his temple. "Wait, so what have you been drinking?"

"Diluted apple juice," You answered, you turned the camera and pointed. "Which fucking sucks by the way so my faces were real."

The crew laughed. Pedro still stared at the photo, you rested your head on top of his. "You didn't answer my question. Truth or drink, are you excited to be a dad?"

"Of course, I'm fucking excited," He looked up at you, you pecked his lips. "Thank you," He whispered. "I love you." You whispered back.

"I love you more," He turned to the crew. "I guess the next time you see us we'll have another drinker in the mix." He joked. "Last time we ended this video as a potential couple and this one we are soon to be parents."

"When we come back we'll be married. I promise you that." He hinted. The cameras cut, the crew applauded and congratulated you two. Pedro grabbed your stuff and held them for you as you walked off-set. It's weird to think one little interview that involved a few shots would lead you to where you are now completely and utterly in love.

yes i made him a dad again. yes i warned yall i do this

if you liked this fic, feel free to like this fic. Comments and reblogs are appreciated. peace and love

tags @skyesthebomb

[circyexistforcontent]

Sagau with a mitsuri like god?

SAGAU: WITH A LOVING GOD READER

❀ synopsis: the god of teyvat is finally looking for a consort, and Zhongli just so happens to be the chosen candidate. What will be Xiao's response to this epiphany?

❀ notes: I wanna make headcanons about demon slayer soon, probably once I am done watching the swordsmith village arc. Also this is a bit rushed because I just want to post something before I study for days on end with exams coming by. pls, this is Xiao and Zhongli centered because I'm making my way to Liyue BABY-

❀ pronouns: they/them

Stories about your strength and benevolence have been shared all around Teyvat. How you have fought countless outer gods and purified multiple worlds from corruption were shared with kids and studied by historians to understand more about your past. But of course, you acolytes are the ones who know just how deep your love runs for your people.

One of them was Xiao. Xiao was one of your followers who got to know you personally, ever since you manage to defeat the tyrant who took control of him. He swore loyalty to you and stood by your side ever since. Small talk was common, and though you have to initiate and carry out the conversation, it was still pleasant.

He makes sure to check that the food you were consuming was safe and not poisoned (as if poison would affect you in any way), and he pressures the cooks to ensure you are only served the best gourmet food. Most of your acolytes know how protective Xiao can be for you so they stay out of your way as much as possible, only communicating with you through gifts and letters that are present in your shrine.

Only a selected few acolytes that can talk to you are the archons. Mostly because Xiao knows he can't defeat them even if he tried, and he wouldn't be a fool to try and intimidate them. He respects the Geo Archon, he can tell he was a very devoted follower of yours and he respects his values. His least favored archon was the Anemo God, though it's more of indifference than dislike.

While he does enjoy the bard's musical talent, all he has ever done is push you away from your work and distract you with little escapades. He has confronted Venti about it multiple times and all he did was shrug off the commotion and skip away.

May Celestia help anyone daring to approach you after you made an announcement that you are finding a consort. They have to go past Xiao first if they want to go to you. He would be supportive of Zhongli being your consort, but something felt off when he proposed the idea to Xiao. He isn't very educated in the ways of feelings, but he can sometimes tell when the emotions are good or bad.

He knows Zhongli is more than worthy to be standing beside you. He should be proud that his Master has found someone like Zhongli, but...why does his heart tell him otherwise? He does his best to shove it down when he watches him hand you a bouquet of qingxins, every time you hold his hand and kiss his face, every time you feed each other Xiangling's latest dish. He doesn't understand, why isn't he happy for the both of you?

Is the problem in him? Why is he like this? He projects his anger towards hilichurl camps before he is left alone to reflect on his feelings. He usually feels like this when he senses something bad is going to happen...is it because the Geo Archon is hiding something? Was something going to happen on the day of the wedding?

Yes, that must be it. The wedding is going to be sabotaged. Or! Or! The wedding must be a scheme to put you in danger. He needs to find a way to postpone the wedding date to find out whats causing him to feel uneasy.

So now it's mostly just him trying to convince you that you don't need to rush the wedding process, while you just sit there for hours straight waiting for him to finish.

[llovelyclouds]

notes on alecto

hii!! so a few months ago i did a full reread of the locked tomb and took note of anything i thought seemed particularly relevant. I want to share what I have but I'm not sure exactly how i want to format everything quite yet- but im just gonna go for it so bear with me if its a little disorganized!

throughout the process i've started coming up with some of my own theories, but i thought it would be cool to post everything i've compiled, so people could use that to make their own conclusions as well :D

I have sections for anything that seemed important about all the original lyctors & their cavaliers, so I'm going to start off with all my information gathered about alecto! buckle in, folks, there's a lot :-)

you can find links to the other posts in the project here!

(also ofc spoilers for the up to the end of nona ahead!)

ALECTO

titles:

Also referred to as “A.L.”, “Annabel Lee,”or “Annie Laurie”  John’s cavalier, the soul of the Earth. (And of course, nona <;3)

Annabel Lee poem  (mentioned htn. pg. 196)

Annie Laurie poem (mentioned htn. pg. 345)

notes from harrow the ninth:

Harrow's psychosis seems to begin after seeing Alecto for the first time (htn. pg. 51)

Augustine describes her as "more lucid" than Mercy as an insult to Mercy (htn. pg 168)

"'God, who did you bury?' [...] 'I buried a monster,' he said." (htn. pg. 195)

(depending on how much of The Body is real) Agrees that Harrow should kill G1dieon (htn. pg. 226)

“Augustine said, ‘To sisters, and to the women we‘ve left behind.’ God’s mouth was cheerful as ever, but his eyes were not when he said, 'Do I have to drink to that?’ For the first time, you were witness to the Saint of Patience discombobulated. ‘Apologies, John. Wasn’t meant as a jab.’ ‘It doesn’t hurt anymore- most of the time,’ said God, and he was still smiling.” (htn. Pg. 277)

"Even the devil bent for God to put a leash around her neck… and the disciples were scared! I cannot blame them! I was terrified! But when the work was done- when I was finished, and so were they, and the new Lyctors found out the price- they bade him kill the saltwater creature before she could do them harm… Oh, but it is a tragedy, to be put in a box and laid to wait for the rest of time." - Teacher (htn. pg. 328)

Says she has to go away for a while immediately after Varun appears (htn. pg. 334)

John says that G1deon doesn’t talk about her, but Augustine and Mercy still feel guilty about what happened (htn. pg. 345)

“When I first met her I just called her First, One. She had a real name, but I buried it with her, and nobody says it anymore.” - John (htn. Pg. 345)

“Annabel Lee was my- what do I call her? Guide? Friend? I’d hope so… [...] She was the first Resurrection. She was my Adam. As the dust settled and I beheld what was left and what was gone, I was entirely alone. The world had been ended, Harrowhark. One moment I was a man, and the next moment I was the Necrolord Prime, the first necromancer, and more importantly, a landlord with no tenants. [...] I was dazed… I was bewildered… and she was my defender and my sole companion, and my colleague in the scholarship of learning how to live again. It was bloody difficult. I had never been God. [...] She lived to see what happened at Canaan House. Not that she took much interest. My first Resurrection was not a normal human being, Harrow, and she struggled to pretend. Anger was her besetting sin. We had that in common. And when the cost of Lyctorhood was paid, when the emotions were at their peak… we found out the price for our sin. The monstrous retribution. To be chased for our crime to the ends of the universe, to have our deed stain our very faces and follow after us like a foul smell. She died after that first terrible assault.” - John (htn. pg. 346)

"That freak would have gone for me already… she could never act human." -Mercymorn (htn. pg. 408)

the lyctors knew some amount of truth about Alecto's resurrection, likely that shes essentially a resurrection beast (htn. pg. 478)

"'A monster, John!' Augustine barked. "She was a bloody monster in a human suit! She was a monster the moment you resurrected her, and then you went and made her worse!'" - Augustine (htn. pg. 478)

Gideon & Pyrrha liked Alecto despite the fact that the other lyctors (at least Mercy and Augustine) didn't (htn. pg. 479)

One of the reasons the lyctors wanted her dead was because the RBs were partially coming for her (htn. pg. 479)

Appears to claim Harrow's body after Gideon "dies" in the river (htn. pg. 500)

notes from nona the ninth

"Sometimes, [...] I don't like when you do- the necromancy word- [...] -but it feels nice at the same time. It's mixed up. It's like when you do that, it makes me sad- not sad that you did it, but sad that you can do it." - Nona, to Palamades (ntn. pg. 65) 

"Nona loved the blue sphere as much as she loved everything else. She, and nobody else, could hear it sing." (ntn. pg. 125)

"'And I'm not scared of dying. Really truly, Cam, I'm not…' 'Why not?' said Camilla. Nona thought about it. 'Because I like letting go of the pull-up bars and falling off,' she said. 'I don't like the part just before you let go and I don't like the part where you hit the floor, but I like the letting go.'"- Nona and Cam (ntn. pg. 125)

"Dust of my dust- such similar star salt- what they did to you and what they wrung from you and what shape they made you fill- we see you still- we seek you still- we murdered- we who murder- you inadvertent tool- you misused green thing- come back to us- take vengeance for us- we saw you- we see you- I see you." - Judith, (as Varun) to Nona (ntn. pg. 164)

Nona likes Gideon's (originally Pyrrhas?? maybe?) sunglasses, but only so long as nobody wore them (ntn. pg. 165)

"then she told herself sternly, Stop it! If she was going to do it, she thought, she might as well do it. She had some vague notion that when you committed to a thing you had to do it all the way. Who had said that to her? Who had taught her that? Once you've stepped in, said the voice in the back of her head, you're in. This isn't the Hokey Pokey. She had remembered something- she had finally remembered something! Only she didn't have anyone to tell." (ntn. pg. 203)

"Nona had thrown exactly two tantrums in her entire life. She couldn't remember anything about the first one, but Pyrrha had told her about it. Pyrrha had been laughing with her mouth, but not with her eyes: her eyes had been very brown and distant and uneasy, as though this tantrum had reminded Pyrrha of something her brain didn't want to bring back." (ntn. pg. 275)

"'But you see, Palamades, I don't mind dying,' said Nona, trying to make him understand. 'I've been doing it for ages. I'm not scared.'" (ntn. pg. 289)

"'I am glad you did not tell us this. We had no idea there was any recourse from Varun the Eater's effects, nor any beast.' 'Its pure theory,' Camilla said curtly. "Something's being transmitted through the light spectrum. Absorption through the eyes is worse for the brain.' This made Nona think of something. It tugged at the edges of her memory and stayed there, nagging.'" - We Suffer & Cam (ntn. pg. 322) 

Nona says that she never liked her hands (ntn. pg. 357)

"She wanted to shout. She wanted to be listened to. She wished the barrier had taken her hands. She wished she had thrust herself into it- become that big seething mass of flesh and meat and tendrils- ruined her body, just melted it; come back messed up, so that nobody could want her body but her, so that it would be hers and nobody else's. This was a horrible thing to think. Nona hated herself immediately and fervently." (ntn. pg. 358)

She hates having just two feet (ntn. pg. 390)

“You were the noise that was everywhere. It was like trying to talk to someone down a phone line with someone screaming through a megaphone in the same room. You drowned everything out. You were so huge and so complicated, and you were screaming, You wouldn’t stop screaming, You were so scared. You were so goddamn mad.” (ntn. pg. 405)

“You were screaming. I wanted you to stop, I wanted… I wanted you. I wanted you like a caveman wants a wildfire… or the sun. I thought you were going to take me, somehow. Purge me. Use me as an instrument. But you didn’t say anything…I was babbling, Show me. Come on. I’m ready. You kept screaming and screaming… like a baby in pain. So I tried to hurt you- I did hurt you. I reached out for you, and it hurt you… but I wasn’t strong enough. The caveman. The wildfire. The Neolithic priest staggering in front of the falling star.” (ntn. pg. 407)

“I wanted to make you the most beautiful body I could think of. He paused and said: “But I was stressed, okay? I was insane. Most of what had made me John had gone somewhere else. There were a few little thoughts left…a handful of things that made me me… a couple scraps of id. It’s not fair to judge me, right? I didn’t do this thinking… I didn’t do it like art. When I was seven, you know, all Nana had to play with in her house was some of Mum’s old toys. And my favourite out of all of them…” He gave a long, shuddering sigh. “My favourite was her old Hollywood Hair Barbie,” he murmured. “I loved her little gold outfit and her long yellow hair. She was the best. She got to have all the adventures. [...]” He said, from my blood and bone and vomit I conjured up a beautiful labyrinth to house you in. I was terrified you’d find some way to escape before I was done. I made you look like a Christmas tree fairy… I made you look like a Renaissance angel… I made you Adam and Eve… Galatea. Barbie. Frankenstien’s monster with long yellow hair. He said, As the world went up I remade us both. I hid me in you… I hid you in me. And when we were together… once the shaman had claimed the sun… I became God.”- John (ntn. pg. 408)

“Do you remember what you said to me once I had done it? When we stood here together?” She looked at him and she said, “Yes.” He said- “You said, ‘I picked you to change, and this is how you repay me?’” She said- “What else did I say?” He said: “You said, ‘What have you done to me? I am a hideousness.’” She said- “What else did I say?” He said, “Where did you put the people? Where did they go?” She said, “I still love you.” He said, "You said that too.” - John & Alecto/Harrow (ntn. Pg. 410)                                                

Nona has some kind of blackout on top of the truck and something happens in that time that convinces Pyrrha of her true identity (ntn. pg. 413)

Also based on Nona’s reaction at that point, maybe Alecto didn’t like Pyrrha even though Pyrrha liked Alecto (ntn. pg. 413)

“She’s scared to die. You’re afraid of so many things, but she’s only afraid to die. Then when the disciples come to you and say the word Lyctor, she does not understand that they want the thing you did to her- she watches as you watch… watch them misunderstand the process.” - Harrow, to John, (ntn. pg. 434)

“In [Aiglemene’s] hands was a huge black-metal pike about the same height as her, with an edge that gleamed in the light. Nona couldn’t stop herself looking at that edge: for some reason it made her palms sweat, and the back of her neck itch again.” (ntn. pg. 454)

“I might not help you when.. I'm back," she said, not quite understanding I. “I'll be different. I'll remember everything. I'll remember the thing I'm trying to forget. And Palamedes-  I won't love him. I won't love Camilla, or Pyrrha, or Hot Sauce, or even Noodle. I won't love anything… I won't know how. I won't be me at all, or.. I'll be the me who knows the thing, and knowing the thing means I'm not Nona- I'm someone else." (ntn. pg. 460)

she recognizes the tower, and the devils (ntn. pg. 440, and 447, respectively)

“You let that monster out of its box," said Ianthe, "and you start us down a path nobody can save us from. If God truly wants her out… if Teacher set this all up… if he wants her…"  “Wants her? He told me to kill her. He said Make it quick, but kill her, said me with my blood could do it- said me with my blood, I was the only one… " [...] “He loves her! " Ianthe howled. “John loves Alecto - John needs Alecto! Without that piece of Goddamn fridge meat, he's nothing- and we need to keep him that way!” - Ianthe & Kiriona, accidentally prompting nona to remember everything (ntn. pg. 470)

“She had been taken down this corridor: she had squeezed through this crack in the rock- not a passageway, not at that point. John had told her he had something to show her. He had said, It's very pretty. You'll like it. [...] John loved her. She was John's cavalier. She loved John. For she so loved the world that she had given them John. For the world so loved John that she had been given. For John had so loved her that he had made her she. for John had loved the world. [...] She hadn't come on purpose; the scrap of black-eyed meat had asked for it- the chain of a kiss: the ice that burnt the flesh of the mouth that had stuck to the mouth that was frozen.The teardrop on the hand. The hand that John had fashioned. [...] John had said, It's so beautiful. Come and look. She had said, There are almost no beautiful things left. where is Anastasia? Let me talk to Anastasia. [...] Glowworms, she had told John. Technically beetles, said John, but I always loved them. Narrow beetles with long strands hanging off them- a carpet of shifting, dead, winking lights at the top of the grave. Greenish, orangish, yellowish, moving over one another silently with those long filaments hanging down. [...] And the water- the huge pool of real salt water, where she had knelt and drank- [...] John and she had swum to the centre hummock rising out of the pool. Not an island, not really. An outcropping. With the marble pillars, and the marble top, and the long low marble table. He said he thought it was a nice place to be. To lie down. She had liked hard things to lie down on. It was hard to endure having a spine.” (ntn. starting page 471)

“There she was; John had made her so ugly, so unbearably ugly. The terrible face, with the terrible arms and legs and the terrible middle part, and the terrible hair, and the terrible ears: the nose too short, the ears too brief. But there she was- and within her the child, asleep, with the strange sword. The sword- her sword- her own edge had been pushed out, her swinging edge, her toy. Her plain bladed sword. And her body was chained up…” (ntn. pg. 474)

“Then Alecto remembered the vow, and turned back upon the altar to face the second child and raised the sword with wrath in her heart, for they meant to bring destruction upon her. But when the black-eyed infant showed her countenance to Alecto, Alecto recalled her, for it was a face one dreamed in Alecto's dream. and Alecto stayed the sword.” (ntn. pg. 476)

“And Alecto said, Pyrrha, he laid me down as an appeasement to them; he fed you to them as an appeasement to them; but he has never appeased me, and now all he has done was teach me how to die." (ntn. Pg. 476) 

"Alecto said, I am very sorry about Samael. The child made no answer. Alecto said, I remember my vows. As I swore to Anastasia I swear to you. I am in your service until you bid me the favour, and whatsoever you appoint I shall perform, and consider the vow rendered. This is what I promised, until such a time as you deal with me as you see fit.” (ntn. pg. 477)

[777bae]

── Sure thing

Scenarios with jude to the lyrics <3

PAIRING… Jude Bellingham x fem!reader | Genre… angst, slight fluff | WC… 2.6k

Love you like a brother

You were childhood best friends, growing up alongside each other, he treated you as his own sibling. How you managed to catch feelings from his treatment is questionable however, love was still love and so whether he treated you as a sibling or as a lover, you would continuously choose to love him.

Treat you like a friend

There’s always going to be the questionable stage in which you are confused on whether you are dating or not. You believed he was still treating you as a friend and so continued to live in denial of your feelings.

Respect you like a lover

He believed that he was expressing his undying love for you, treating you in the manner he was. The confusion continued on, both unsure on confessing your feelings for each other.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

Singing in the kitchen together, hand in hand, as you sway to each other’s beats, feeling as if it were you against the world, never once breaking eye contact as your cheesy smiles spoke more than what could ever be said.

You could bet that, never gotta sweat that

Having rapping competitions to see who could rap the fastest, however they always ended up with you laughing at Jude’s choice of clothes, his cap always being backwards as his moves always became animated when he began.

If you be the cash

Everyone believed you were in it for the money, the constant belittling leading to a decline in your mental health and so Jude ensured that he would love you endlessly. You agreed, confirming that your love for him was worth more than a simple piece of paper.

I'll be the rubber band

Jude refused to leave your side. Much to your ‘displeasure’ (although you secretly enjoyed the attention). He always needed to be attached to you in some way, whether it be his arm around your waist, or his hand clasping yours, you could always be sure that he would be by your side, ready to take on anything.

You be the match

You were a very emotional person, by perhaps every emotion. Anger, love, passion, sadness, happiness. You knew how to express your feelings however whenever you did so, said emotion would consume you, causing what others would call as ‘outbursts’. Whenever these situations would occur Jude would immediately be by your side, his arms wrapped around you as you would release your feelings. His comforting words always calmed you down as you would continue to remain in place, enjoying the short moments in which you could feel this comfort.

I will be a fuse, boom

The two of you were both known as being quite mischievous and so whenever one of you was up to no good, it was almost a guarantee that the other was in on it as well. You were both into pranks, constantly devising the perfect plan, and so leading to them being perfectly executed as your laughter would merge after every execution, those moments forever being your favourites.

Painter baby, you could be the muse

Art was your strong suit and so whenever you finished a project, you would be bombarded with constant praise, even without asking for his input. This would help boost your ego as you grew more confident with every new piece of media.

I'm the reporter baby, you could be the news

Constantly mimicking his post game interviews from the moment he arrives home. He would always act like he hates it when he secretly loves it as it confirms that you spent your time watching him match.

'Cause you're the cigarette and I'm the smoker

Him never being able to speak for himself and always needing you to help express himself, a reassuring hug from you to him always lead him to gain confidence, to which he would use as he would begin to express his opinion in tough situations.

We raise a bet, cause you're the joker

Playing card games with each other, both of you refusing to admit that you lost due to your competitiveness and so leading to a mini argument. Eventually, one of you would crumble from guilt and so the day would end with you apologising to each other and ending up on the sofa cuddling.

Checked off, you are a chalk

You always have to remind him of chores and other activities he needed to do, almost as if you were his personal agent as every so often you would get annoyed at his forgetfulness.

And I can be the blackboard

Jude would notice how annoyed you would get at having to constantly remind him of things and so he began to try and get better. He would start writing down small activities you mentioned needed to be done and would do them for you, surprising you as you would thank him continuously, apologising for how annoyed you used to get.

You could be the talk

Between the two of you, you were the easiest to rile up. Easily growing angry and annoyed over such trivial matters. Many mentioned how you were the fiesty one and so it was easily balanced between the both of you.

And I could be the walk

Though Jude was the calmer one, that didn’t mean he couldn’t act up when he wanted to. Whenever you were hurt because of comments made about your relationship, he would always grow angry. The constant hate directed towards you always caused an angry post to appear on his social media, showing that he in fact could also get riled up.

Even when the sky comes falling

Whenever it would start to rain whilst you were both out, he would always hold up an umbrella above you, ensuring that you wouldn’t get wet and despite your constant persistence, he refused to put it over him. Eventually, this leads to you cuddling up to him to ensure that he would also be covered.

Even when the sun don't shine

On a cold winter's night you would snuggle up with each other on the sofa, a warm blanket placed on top of the two of you as you would watch a movie together, however you would always end up falling asleep in Jude’s comfort as he would quickly following, the both of you ending up sleeping there for the night.

I got faith in you and I

Everyone said that you were perfect for each other, even from the day you first met you were inseparable and so time could only tell before your young love would begin to blossom.

So put your pretty little hand in mine

Walking hand in hand wherever you go, even if you or him find it embarrassing in the moment you both still appreciate the small expressions of love.

Even when we're down to the wire baby

Whenever your relationship goes into a rough patch, you both still know you love each other, even after the terrible words exchanged in your arguments. You both just knew that you would need a few days away from one another and yet both your hearts still yearned for each other.

Even when it's do or die

Jude was your ride or die. You wouldn’t know what you’d be doing without him. Most likely because you’ve known him since when you can first remember but that doesn’t change the fact that he has been here with you all this time, and will continue to be up until your last moments.

We could do it baby, simple and plain

You both knew you didn’t need to overexert yourselves to make the other happy and so, instead of extravagant date nights every date, you would both decide to spend it in each other's arms, cooking together, or just playing games. You could keep it simple and plain and still be able to enjoy yourselves.

'Cause this love is a sure thing

Knowing that he is your past, present and future, and planning out your lives together, spending and cherishing every moment together.

You could bet that, never gotta sweat that

Playing monopoly together and arguing with each other on whether you stole from the bank (which you did). One of you practically sweating as the other began to enter the last moments of the game.

Be the lover, I'll be the fighter baby

Calming him down after another one of his angry posts about the hate you receive, telling him that it truly doesn’t matter as long as the two of you will continue to love each other.

If I'm the blunt, you could be the lighter babe

He is always there to back you up whenever you get into fights, allowing you to have the freedom of choosing your actions, whether they would have consequences or not, and just being there in case it escalates.

Fire it up

Secretly cheering you on when you finally stand up for yourself, seeing you constantly vulnerable had caused him to grow angry and seeing you finally stop the attack made him proud.

Writer baby, you could be the quote

Helping him write down small speeches and preparing him for important interviews, all while messing about and writing down random inspirational quotes, placing them all around your house for him to see.

If I'm the lyric baby, you could be the note, record that

Singing together once again, this time pretending it was your own concert as you held ‘mics’ up and began to practically scream the lyrics.

Saint I'm a sinner, prize I'm a winner and it's you

Him inviting you onto the pitch after his team won a trophy, immediately hugging you as you could feel the excitement bubbling off of you. After taking photos with the team he would arrive in front of you, placing the medal onto you as you pulled him into a tight hug.

What did I do to deserve that

Always returning back to one another and expressing the feelings you had been bottling up between you, allowing you to both grow and understand each other more.

Paper baby, I'll be the pen

You both do an artsy date at home where you try to teach him how to draw, by recreating one of your many works. He eventually gives up and decides to draw you in his own way, making you look like an animated character as that drawing was instantly hung on your wall once it was completed.

Say that I'm the one, cause you are a ten

Him always saying that you are the most beautiful girl he has ever seen and whenever placed in front of a woman who you would consider was prettier than you, his longing eyes would still search for you within a crowd.

Even when the sky comes falling

Dancing in the rain, lightning causing his features to be brought out beautifully as you ignored the fact that the two of you would most likely catch a cold.

Even when the sun don't shine

Staying inside on a foggy day, just staying in bed longer than needed and cuddling up to one another, enjoying the comfort you both brought to each other.

I got faith in you and I

Him promising that he would spend his future with him, in a small house with as many kids as you want, including the dog that you’d always dreamed of having.

So put your pretty little hand in mine

Bringing you small gifts on important days, knowing that you’d feel guilty if he brought expensive ones as you can not afford such gifts for him.

Even when we're down to the wire baby

Going through new experiences together and admitting that you would both like to in the future as well.

Even when it's do or die

Him happily standing up for you when an interviewer crosses the line, always ensuring that he will be on your side.

We could do it baby, simple and plain

Wondering whether you were right for him as you once again felt as if you weren’t good enough as you didn’t have the expensive items other footballers girlfriends had.

'Cause this love is a sure thing

Him ensuring that no matter how much money you had, he would love you endlessly.

This love between you and I is simple as pie baby

Knowing that you could always rely on him being there for you whenever needs be, just like how you were for him, and realising how simple life could be, not needing everything to be over the top.

It's such a sure thing (such a sure thing)

Knowing that he will eventually propose and that you don’t need to stress about when he would, accepting that he would do it when he feels ready.

Ooh it such a sure thing (such a sure thing)

Him reciting your words after getting a small lecture about a small issue, a huge smile on his face as he treasured moments like this.

Even when the sky comes falling

Trying to find the perfect place to spend date night as it was your turn to decide and him eventually admitting that he prefers spending them at home with you.

Even when the sun don't shine

You always go to his games whenever possible and no matter the weather, eventually ending up in him scolding you for coming out in that weather before pulling you into a tight hug, his way of ‘protecting’ you from the kpotential illnesses’.

I got faith in you and I

Him finally proposing to you in the comfort of your own home, the sheer amount of happiness you felt in that moment cannot even be expressed through words.

So put your pretty little hand in mine

The loving kiss he gave you after you accepted his ring, his hand on your cheek as you both smiled lightly, realising that you were now experiencing what you had planned.

Even when we're down to the wire baby

Planning out your wedding together whilst still joking around with each other, your laughter filling the room as it reminds you of the old times.

Even when it's do or die

Him sneaking in a few comments about your future together and the future children you would have, sneakily wrapping an arm around your waist whilst wiggling his eyebrows as you would just giggle at his mischievousness.

We could do it baby, simple and plain

Stressing about planning for the wedding, your easily emotional mood being caught on by Jude as he tells you that whether the wedding is simple or extravagant, nothing would ever stop his love for you.

'Cause this love is a sure thing

Going out dress shopping with your friends and then finding the perfect dress, them confirming that he would love it so much.

Love you like a brother

Memories of the childhood you spent with Jude causing your smile to grow as you remember how naïve you were as a child to not have confessed your love for him sooner.

Treat you like a friend

Sneaking out the night before your wedding to see each other one last time, and beginning to reminisce about the years you had spent with him, finally admitting that you had loved him way longer before he confessed.

Respect you like a lover

You walking down the aisle, your beautiful white dress matching the veil that cascaded across your features, making you unable to see the loving looks you would receive from Jude.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

Singing together in your home after experiencing the most loving and vulnerable moments of your lives together, your wedding day.

[waitingtobebroken]

All you lovely, talented people have finally broken me down!

I have finished the bonus chapter for my fic Flowers From The Grave Of Our Friendship (An Aziraphale and Crowley through the ages story, except with a lot of misunderstandings, angst and pining while fucking, if you need the reminder - it has been 3.5 years after all haha!)

It's set in Florence, 1895 and I'll let our ineffable husbands give you a brief summary of what to expect, taken from chapter 14,

"Do you recall Florence?" "1895?" "There was this nice young lady I was supposed to steer in the right direction and you-" "Tempting a priest," Crowley supplied quickly. Even if the warm weight of the love of his existence above him was not making it particularly hard to think, he wasn't sure he would have been able to recall the lie he had told more than a century ago. It had happened just after his nap, those tears still fresh in his mind, making him forget just long enough that Aziraphale didn't love him, didn't need him like Crowley did. He had known he was acting like a stalker, more so than usual, and he couldn't even use the excuse that he had been watching over his angel. No, he had followed him because he couldn't bear the thought of Aziraphale being away from him and he had let the other notice him because… Because Florence was an amazingly romantic city and he was demon enough that he could admit to himself, at least now, that he had wanted to explore it with his angel. Not that they had seen much of the city anyway. "Lord, we spent the whole time in that tiny hotel room." "I kissed you until all I could ever remember tasting was you."

I'm very excited to share this with you as I planned on writing it SO long ago, before I got distracted by newer and shinier projects!

It will be posted on Saturday, and will be part of the @goodomensafterdark smut wars!

[febuary30thday]

Muichiro Sick HCs

Sorry for being inactive guys, I had a lot of tests, quizzes, and projects to do for the last 2 weeks of school. Since next week is my last week of school, feel free to request things as comments on this post, and I'll see if I can get to them, thank you!

As an apology, have some sick Muichiro HCs in honor of his backstory being released and Swordsmith Village Arc in general. This version of Muichiro HCs is platonic, no yandere, but I'll do a romantic Muichiro HCs soon enough. However before I get to requests, I'll do Sick Mitsuri.

Because of his strict training regime, he can't really accept the fact that he's sick and needs to rest.

He's coughed up blood before while training, and he's fine, so what's a little fever to him?

A lot, actually

His body almost collapses on him because he's been ignoring his fever for so long

Once you heard the news, you rushed over to his house. The Kakushi were taking care of him, but skedaddled when they saw you.

"Cowards. I'm not even that scary."

That was a complete lie, you looked like you were about to murder them, and you holding your katana like you were about to strike only confirmed their opinions

He had a wet towel on his head, and his breathing was heavy

"Muichiro, can you hear me?"

He turns to you, his face blank, despite his heavy breathing

"Of course, you would look at me like that."

He blinks, and his crow starts yelling at you while standing protectively near him to make sure he's okay.

"Relax, Little Miss Sassy, I'm here to care for him because he obviously can't ask for help. *Sigh* I'm going to die early because of you, y'know that? I'm only 17, and I'm never going to get married because you're going to kill me."

You look at him. "If you keep doing this, you're going to die early."

You go make him some soup, and because of his slight hatred of being treated like a child, he ate it himself.

You also gave him so comfier clothes to change into, because he was overheating.

You made sure to call Kocho to take of him, and when she got there, she thanked you for letting her know but when she finished, you stayed by his side for the rest of the day.

He doesn't remember who you are sometime, but he feels happy near you.

He also was very happy you stayed, because it made him happy, like his heart fluttered.

His crow doesn't like you at all, but you don't really care.

Your crow and his crow are always at each other's necks, and it's funny to watch.

"Rest now, Muichiro. You'll need it."

After he got better, you scolded him, but he doesn't listen

He just stuck his tongue out at you

The Hashira think the relationship between you two is cute, and Shinobu frequently teases you about it, using words like "son", and "mother" when talking about you and Muichiro

She asks if you're going to take Nezuko and Tanjiro as your children if you ever get the chance

You denied it

Well, you did end up doing that.

One big traumatized family

Spoiler: When Muichiro dies, you start crying, even while fighting Kokushibo alongside him

You die at the hands of Muzan

Muichiro thinks of you like an elephant. Because of your heavy presence and how loud you are, but how you care for him like he's your son or family in general. Elephants have close bonds with family in general.

[thewitchofbooks]

A few things about Cyril Rose, Chevalier Michel and Lucian

I was always curious about Chevalier's behavior towards Cyril, especially after Lucian was introduced as the covert and the royal guard later on for Chevalier. The question in my mind was, if Chevalier really trust Cyril to become the lead knight of the foreign affairs faction, then would he ever call him by his name? The post is based on Chevalier's election promise party event

Spoilers and facts about Cyril (and a few about Lucian) under the cut!

After obtaining Chevalier's Early Clear Bonus from this party event (promise from 2nd anniversary/election):

The story was in his POV and fully voiced (meaning that his thoughts and dialog were voiced, except for a few lines of narration).

But from this story, we are able to see a few sides of Chevalier that we never saw before, nor did we hear him talk about. Including Cyril Rose.

The story starts with him training with the knights, before "killing them" as he said after knocking them out. And it ends with Cyril being the only one standing. From the Mc's POV, Cyril could keep up really well, but Chevalier kicked his sword. In Chevalier's POV, Cyril actually got distracted, else the battle would have continued.

This whole training thing was never something that Chevalier would have done, but he feels the need to show off in front of Emma.

Back to the topic, while training and inwardly praising all the knights, who were able to keep up so much longer against him, Chevalier thought of Cyril.

And while thinking of him as Clavis' knight, he also acknowledges his name!! The same way Lucian's name is acknowledged, meaning that it's written right on top of his job in the castle:

Translation:

Chevalier's thoughts: 'Usually, I leave the management of the knight's to Clavis and the red head (Cyril),'

So he does, indeed, acknowledge him with his name. Conclusion: Chevalier loves to "make fun" of others with these nicknames (more like he points out what describes them XD). Lucian is also called the long black haired royal guard (Since Chevalier is the king, Lucian is the royal guard).

A few things for Cyril:

In the party event story (previous discussion), it shows how much more familiar the knights are with Chevalier and how much more they are scared of Cyril (as their master in training). Chevalier told them to run 100 laps around the castle, making the knights complain about it (with no fear towards him). Translation of the moment:

Knights:"Hyahhhhhh.....100 laps!?"

Chevalier:"Even if I'm showing the losers mercy?"

Cyril:"Thank you for your mercy! Everyone, keep your mouth shut!"

When Cyril told them to shut their mouth, they all stopped complaining and run out to train

Before that, Chevalier admitted to Cyril that out of all of the knights, he would be the only one standing at the battlefield. And not only that, but he told him to make sure to withdraw if something goes wrong and return to the castle before he dies. He also said that he should help and save as many of those around him, leaving Cyril at a loss but he was quick to agree with Chevalier.

Thank you for reading this far! This event was truly enjoyable and definitely worth to get the ECB. A small flashback of Chevalier and Clavis is also in there, but in Chevalier's thoughts.

Chevalier was drawing Benitoite in huge detail and Emma was watching in amazement, before she complimented him. Chevalier thought that he never payed attention to drawing before, but he once tried it, because Clavis made him draw to find a weakness, but Chevalier knew how, so Clavis threw a tantrum when he saw the finished project.

And of course, after he finished drawing Benitoite, he drew Jade and gave attention to the huge greenhouse, because it looked like it came out of a fairy-tale, so he knew Emma would love this the most.

Although he finished with the drawings, gave them to Emma after she asked to keep them, knowing that all he was doing was useless and had nothing to do with their lessons, he still asked her to draw something for him.

(Keep in mind that Sariel doesn't give Emma lessons as much anymore, it's mostly Chevalier when he is off of work).

Emma drew roses, books (Chevalier's thoughts were that this was a rose garden with her favourite things), and in the end, she added added tiger! And Chevalier took the quill pen from her hands to draw a little rabbit too. He started praising Emma a lot and her expressions changed a lot, so he laughed very hard at her (his thoughts were that he never laughed this hard in his whole life).

[nohoperadio]

Here's a little breakdown of my personal relationship/non-relationship with various types of aesthetic self-modification (?, I feel like there might be a word or at least a more elegant phrase to denote this category). The point is not to offer my "take" on each thing but to express the different feelings/desires/inhibitions my psyche manifests around them. Some of these will approach awkwardly personal territory, fair warning! You may notice that basically none of them are especially positive; I'm going to leave off from analyzing that pattern for this post.

Tattoos -- I think tattoos as a concept are extremely cool, frequently they're cool in practice also and I like seeing other people's, but I don't think I've ever had even the smallest urge to get one for myself. I'm not totally sure why. The lack of an obvious thing to get is one factor, I feel like "band tattoo" would be the most likely thing for me to have but I don't like the idea of directly lifting a band logo or album art and I really don't like the idea of a lyric tattoo (I offer no justification for these prejudices), so I'd have to get clever with it if I'm doing that and I'm not very clever. More broadly, I predict that my enthusiasm for any artwork I put on my body would fade through overexposure in a matter of weeks if not days--other people describe "barely knowing it's there" after a short time--which on top of making the value of the project seem dubious, I feel like having a permanent image on my skin that I don't actively love would be something I'd feel bad about rather than neutral. Like "man, that thing's on my arm and I don't care about it at all, that sucks" rather than just not noticing it. Maybe I'm wrong about that.

(Tattoos are the one that got me thinking about this whole subject I think, it feels like they're reaching a ubiquity in the culture where it's almost like you're expected to have a reason not to have one rather than a reason to? Maybe that's just a people-I-know thing, anyway it got me thinking about why I don't want one.)

Piercings -- An interesting thing about me and piercings is that it's virtually impossible for me to notice when somebody has them unless I'm like, actively consciously scrutinizing their face (or whatever it is). When I was about ten months into my current job I asked my co-worker who I worked closely with almost every day "hey when did you get that septum ring" and she was like "well way before I met you". That is simply how it is with me and piercings and I make no apology.

If my inability to perceive piercings (perceirvings...) makes me indifferent to the idea of getting one, what makes me actively hostile is the total certainty that I would fiddle with it constantly if I did. I know these hands and their ways and there would simply be no dissuading them, it would be so bad you guys, oh my god. This is probably the hardest no on the list I think, although I haven't finished the post yet so idk maybe I'll think of a worse one.

Makeup -- There's undeniably a lot that's very beautiful in the universe of makeup and there's also the weird dark side, I have dabbled a little in this area and in my heart I feel more positively than not about it, but it's just never going to be a sustainable part of my life because (not unrelated to previous para) I am a perennial and unrepentant face-toucher. I will be itching and rubbing my face-skin and also inflicting other hard-to-characterize punishments upon it (is this "stimming"?) until the day I die and anything that wants to be on my face has just gotta deal. It would probably be better if this was not the case but I don't make the rules, sorry.

Haircuts -- When I was a child I haaaaaated getting my hair cut, like the physical sensation of it? Was so horrible and would usually make me cry and always ruin my day (is this "sensory overload"?), I didn't understand why I was being made to go through this ordeal and basically as soon as I reached an age when I realized my mom couldn't literally force me to do it if I just stubbornly refused hard enough--that age was 13 I think--I stopped. I haven't had a professional haircut since that time although I'm sure I could cope with the sensory aspect at this point, it's just not a habit I ever picked up again (I've had a couple of non-professional ones from my ex who just kind of wanted to try it, in a not particularly ambitious or dramatic fashion). Sometimes I feel like I should, but idk. My hair as it stands is not optimized for making me look hot but I don't think it looks especially horrible either, it's just kind of whatever I think.

Complicating factor here: I've had trichotillomania since I was 15/16, and it's hard to imagine it going away at this point but it's a lot more under control than it used to be, to the point where you can't really tell just from my appearance that something's up now. I say "under control", I have very little conscious control over it and usually no conscious awareness that I'm doing it, but over the years the compulsion seems to have unconsciously settled into a routine where it's just kind of... sculpting my hair into a more-or-less normal silhouette? Like I sort of have a fringe and stuff despite no haircuts. Oh I guess this doesn't make sense unless I clarify that I mostly break rather than pluck the hair nowadays, that's a big part of the gradual unconscious shift that's occurred.

A fun thing about trichotillomania is that it often makes people really uncomfortable when you talk about having it, which sucks for me because it makes me feel lonely, but I guess it sucks for the person feeling uncomfortable too in a smaller way. If you're one of the people who feel uncomfortable around this topic, sorry! Quite genuinely.

Gender transition in general -- I feel like I'm just, just on the boring side of cis-by-default. I think about transitioning shockingly often for someone who's never gonna do it, like it's not searing a hole in my heart or anything like it is for a lot of people but it occupies that "it would be cool to learn an instrument" kind of niche in my thoughts, if that makes sense? (Probably a bit stronger than that analogy makes it sound, it's on my mind frequently but not with a massive sense of urgency attached I guess is what I'm getting at.) I can see myself taking the plunge if the medical technology was like 10% better, or the social technology was like 20% better, or with some medium-sized changes in how my personality was configured, but this life being this life there's no way in heck the juice would be worth the squeeze. If I had one fifth of the executive function required to do all of that lying to doctors and learning how to clothes shop and having awkward conversations with people in my life and all the rest of it, well I can list like ten things I'd rather spend it on first. And I don't!

Glasses -- Love wearing glasses, 10/10 no notes. I knew since I was like 11 that my face should have a pair of glasses on it and I was very smug when the optician agreed (I did not cheat on the eye test in any way for what it's worth). The only times I'm not wearing glasses are sleeping and showering. I don't even carry a case because there's no point because I simply don't ever take them off. This is probably overkill, I think as a kid I was instructed to only put them on when I need to see something in the distance, ignoring that and just wearing them permanently has probably led to my vision weakening to the point where they're now pretty much mandatory in every situation, but I don't give a shit about that because just let me wear my goddamned glasses okay, fuck off. It's actually crazy how much I like wearing glasses, this is the only true thumbs up on the list.

I remembering trying to explain how I like my glasses to a then-close friend of mine many years ago when the subject of laser eye surgery came up in conversation, he said I should get the surgery and then just wear glasses with non-prescription lenses. When I tried to explain why that wouldn't be the same at all he was adamant that I was just being stubborn. That guy was a wonderful person in many ways and I loved him very deeply, but man what a dumbass thing to say.

Facial hair -- There are so many great beards and moustaches in this world, there are few more cheering sights than someone bearing some swish whiskers who's pleased about it, but personally I don't wish to be involved in that business at all.

I never learned how to ride a bike -- Obviously this one doesn't belong on the list, it doesn't fit with any of the other categories, and yet I feel compelled to include it here. And why should I resist that which compels me? This is my post. Yeah, I'm the oldest of four siblings, we were all given bikes at the appropriate kid-on-bike age, the others picked it up but not me. I liked it when I had stabilizers on my bike, then they took them off and I started falling off the bike, and after a very short amount of time I gave up. Like I didn't get mad injuries or anything, it just felt like I wasn't improving at it quickly enough and I didn't feel like keeping it up so I didn't. Early indication of my bad personality.

Fashion in general -- Clothes shopping has always been extremely aversive to me for whatever reason, it's gotten a little better in recent years, I have been able to exist inside clothes shops for long enough to purchase a small thing or two, but eh. Most of my tops are band t-shirts I bought at gigs, most of my bottoms are exactly identical pairs of jeans, there's just not much going on you know? But unlike with most of the items on this list I would really like to be doing this properly. I would like to wear cuter things with prettier colours and designs. This one's an actual goal. But so far I haven't really made progress. The aforementioned shopping sucks thing, plus a fear of being so aesthetically clueless that I just make myself look like a big idiot if I try anything risky, plus the fact that doing things that are not my established routine is tricky in general--these are barriers for me. I guess another barrier is that the things that would be most interesting to try out and therefore most potentially motivating fall into the wrong-gender-clothes category and therefore bring into play some of the barriers from that other category a few ones up. I did actually somehow get myself to dabble in that area some years ago to a modest but positive degree of satisfaction. It'll probably happen again. The patterns and causes that determine whether I can or cannot find motivation to engage in a thing--they are mysterious indeed.

Like horn implants or whatever other crazy miscellany -- I don't want anything in this category and don't have any non-trivial thoughts about it either. Including this section for completeness only.

---

Well, there you have it, that's the post. Now you know a bit more about some of my little weirdsies. If you actually made it through the whole thing, a) how interesting and b) why not tell me a little weirdsy of yours in return, whether it pertains to the above list or not? Why not get all antiphonal on my post, that way I'd get to know a thing about you as well, it might be a whole fun kind of deal. You don't have to though, I didn't make this post to try to snare people into letting themselves be known, I just kind of made it to be a post mostly. I make all sorts of kinds of posts you know? And so I thought I'd try one that's like this.

[yayforocs]

felt awkward to tack this on the prev post so i'm,.,,,,,,,,, here

but!! i'm not just gonna like Make An OC and then only ever have one drawing and a small blurb about them and then just never acknowledge them again, no!! i gotta properly doodle and figure things about about the character and Make Them A Proper Character!!! so i doodled more of aron's helsmet :VVV

and then also. wrote about aron's helsmet. to feel out the character and explore around how she and her person interact with and feel about each other :VVVVV

Posting the one-shot under the cut!!!

It had been a good hour and a half of solid work when the redstoner, hunched over a worktable with bits and bobs in hand, realized she didn't have enough redstone to finish what she'd wanted to get done for the day. She bit back an irritated sigh, and opted to check the drawers under her work table. None there, just like there was none in her backup storage on the other side of the room, just like there was none in her inventory. She let the sigh loose as she slumped into her chair, and ran her hand down her face. Her eyes glanced to the project currently taking up her free time: while right now it was a mess of metal and circuitry, one day it was going to be a pair of glider wings. Gods and saints knew she wasn't ever going to get her hands on any elytra or her counterpart's wings, so she knew she'd have to make them on her own if she wanted them. This did mean, however, a visit that she didn't want to bother with, ever, preferably. But she couldn't afford to pay anyone else to make any sort of supply runs for her, and wasn't sure she'd even want to anyway- she felt ripped off last time she'd tried that.

Resigned, she pushed herself up to standing, and started rummaging around in her chests for supplies. Pickaxes, armor, torches, sword, anything she needed for a run. Several minutes later, she stood with a ready inventory in the middle of the room, hands on her hips as she let her eyes wander over everything. ...And keep wandering over everything.

Hels help her, she did not want to go.

But she rolled her eyes at her own stupid procrastination, and looked to the nearest light source- currently her lamp on the desk- and focused. And briefly, inexplicably, she felt traces of warmth on her skin as from the sun, and could swear a faint breeze barely rustled her hair as she caught a slight whiff of something fresh and green and growing. Trees. A forest.

Better put her armor on first, then. Feather falling would only help so much, but better than nothing. And besides, her other's competence in flying would be enough to keep them from crashing too hard, she was confident in that much. She buckled the boots on with a grim smirk.

At least she'd get to have fun with it.

Enchantment on, she again focused on the light, mentally preparing to act fast as soon as she was over. The light, and slowly, everything else in the room, fuzzed into white as she tipped over the precipice of spatial travel, and went into freefall. Her stomach flipped as new surroundings blinked into view, namely open sky, and her hand shot out and grabbed at the green blur in her peripheral.

"Ack-!"

She'd caught hold, and the two spun out.

"What are-?!"

The world somehow righted, and she silently gripped the harness strap she'd managed to nab as they awkwardly stilted through the trees down to the ground. It wasn't as hard of a landing as she'd hoped- they still both stumbled around each other and ended up on their knees at the end of it- but she'd take what she could get.

"What was that for?" her other, Aron, asked, breathless.

She didn't answer, instead looking around at their surroundings. Should be something decent nearby. She set off in a direction.

"Hey, wait wait wait-!" Aron called, jogging to catch up. "Nice to see you, too," she said sarcastically, and was again met with silence. It stuck for a second or two before Aron started again. "Really, though, like- I could feel when you were about to- I can get down to the ground before you do that, probably, just like- can you wait next time, maybe?"

"I know you can," she responded, but otherwise didn't answer.

Aron made a flabbergasted noise. "Then why- we could've both been hurt! Or respawned!"

She just shrugged.

There was the start of a reply behind her, and then it cut off with a sigh.

They walked in silence for a second.

"...So what are you doing?"

"Why d'you need to know?"

"I dunno, it's- I mean, if- I could help you with something."

She'd just tried to- why would- ugh. This was why she didn't like her. Always tried to kiss up to everyone.

Or kiss up to her, at least. Absolutely useless gesture.

"I'm gettin’ materials, if you really have to know. And no, I don't need you to come with. What part of I Tried To Take Us Both Out Of The Sky made you think I'd want help?"

The steps behind her stopped, and she relaxed a little- but then they started up again.

"Well, it's- it's just dangerous in the caves and such by yourself, so... You prob'ly should have help, y'know? Besides, I uh... I was going to get materials, too."

Great.

Perfect.

Wonderful.

...And yet, she had to acknowledge one of Aron's points. Caving was dangerous on your own, particularly when you were still unaccustomed to all of the dangers this world was only too keen to provide. Having a second person... could be useful, she supposed.

She sighed.

"Fine. Anything happens to me, I'm gonna blame you."

“Ok! Um, that- that works, you can do that. Uh… the cave I was gonna go to was over there.” She assumed Aron pointed, and a glance back showed she did, off to the left. “I’d marked it the other day, but I never went in to check it out properly. We could…?”

Well, it’d be quicker than trying to find one on her own. She pivoted, and quietly snerked when Aron just about ran into her.

She heard Aron take in a breath, but didn’t find out if she was going to comment on the pivot or the laugh because she apparently thought better of it and didn't say anything at all.

—-----

Surprisingly, Aron was fairly quiet for the trip to the cave- and even when they arrived, she was still quiet aside from the occasional callout- she needed the coal here, the iron over there would be good, she’ll grab this gravel real quick to try for flint later. It was something she reciprocated, if only for sake of not losing each other.

It was… weird.

And nice.

It almost felt like she was alone, really, but without the worries of having to constantly watch her back. She kept an eye on the front, and Aron faithfully kept up the rear.

At one point, they found a huge dripstone cavern. Even upon first glance it was clear there was a lot of loot to be had- and mobs to clear out. Aron provided a water bucket for a safe decent.

She noticed Aron didn’t use her wings to get down, instead going down the water after her.

She wasn’t sure whether she was insulted or not.

“If you don’t mind me asking, um- what’re you getting materials for?”

And there it was. Asked with the worst timing, as well, because they were reaching the bottom.

So all she answered with was, “Mobs,” and pulled her sword and shield out, to which Aron awkwardly conceded and pulled out her own weapon.

The blessed lack of conversation resumed as they circled out from their drop point, throwing down torches and clearing out what they could.

But no good thing lasts forever, and when no mobs were in sight, Aron brought it up again.

“So- since they’re all gone, what uh- what’re the materials for?”

“I’m makin’ a giant bomb to drop off at your base next time I visit.”

“I- sorry, what?” Aron squeaked, and she rolled her eyes.

“Bein’ facetious. It’s a personal project. Not for you.”

“...Oh.”

Silence, only broken by a faint skeleton’s clatter that was too far off to bother with. She spotted some iron and opened her mouth to call it, but Aron spoke first.

“Oh, hey, uh- there’s some uh- there’s some gold up there.” Aron pointed to a crevice, and they both set off towards it. She’d get the iron after.

“...Um, also, I know you don’t want- me to call you… my name.” Oh hels, this again. “But it’s… kinda weird to just like- ‘hey’ at you, y’know? Um. Is there anything that uh… you’d like to be called?”

Truth be told, this was something that’d stuck with her the last time they’d had this discussion and though, at the time, she gave no answer at all and made sure to be plenty rude about it, she’d mulled it over a bit. Eventually, she did come up with something, though it was a tad on-the-nose.

It was just Aron in reverse. Nora. Simple, but it seemed fitting, all things considered.

But she didn’t want Aron to ever call her that, let alone call her any sort of consistent name ever, so she didn’t say anything about wanting to be called Nora.

“No.”

“Like… not even a nickname, or anything…?”

“Nah. Keep ‘hey’ing me all you want. Or… um- something. Don’t call me anything. No names.” Nora reached the gold first. Aron let her have them, apparently stumped by her answer. Or stunned, either way. “Saw some iron back there,” she said after grabbing the grand total of two pieces of gold ore, and started back towards it without checking if she was being followed. The footsteps behind her told her she didn’t need to. As she walked, she looked to the side- and down. There was a whole other level to the cavern below them, and she was already attempting to take stock of what there was down there. It was really dark, so she couldn’t hardly see anything, but she thought she might could make out some redstone in the wall closer to the top.

Finally.

Clattering bones sounded again suddenly, much closer than they had been before, and she turned just in time to get an arrow to her shoulder. She gasped, hand darting to it as she stumbled back from the hit- and then all air escaped her lungs as she slipped right off the edge and plummeted. Air whistled past her ears as she somehow managed to wriggle herself to face the ground, desperately trying to get her water bucket out despite the fact that she’d never actually had to clutch before and didn’t even know if she could but she was falling too fast and couldn’t wrestle the darn thing out in time and

She jerked as her momentum was suddenly swooped to the side. Nora wheezed, the pull stretching her coveralls tight against her throat, but as they slowed to a stop in the near pitch-black, she decided she did at least prefer that to dying and having to come back again later. Aron settled them against the ground smoothly, making sure Nora was on her feet before clicking her wings back into place.

“Are you-” Groans started filling the cavern. “Right-! Right, shelter first, right yes, um-” Nora screwed her eyes shut as Aron threw a torch down, the light blinding on eyes that had been attempting to adjust. “UhhHH over here!” Aron grabbed at Nora’s wrist, but she jerked it away. Aron halted awkwardly, and glanced up, making eye contact.

Nora couldn’t even come up with anything to say, and upon realizing she didn’t have time to anyways, shouldered past Aron (on her good side, of course) and stalked towards the wall behind her. Probably, hopefully, where Aron had been planning on going anyway. She pulled out a pickaxe and slammed it into the wall, biting back a yelp as it jarred her hurt shoulder. Once her other joined her they made quick work of digging out an alcove and quickly dropping materials in front to block them in. This time, Nora already had her eyes shut when Aron stuck a torch down in the small space. Eyes still closed, she leaned back against the wall, this time wincing, and slid down it, a now emptied hand going back to her shoulder. The arrow was still in it.

“Do you need-”

“I don’t have any potions on me.”

“-Ah. I think I do, um…” Aron started digging in her bag, and after a second, triumphantly pulled out two. “Ah! I do! Um, here, I can-”

“Just give it,” Nora hissed, jerking forwards and snatching one out of Aron’s hand- and Aron flinched back, breath hitching for just a moment. Nora purposefully wasn’t looking at her, and wasn’t watching out of the corner of her eye as she tried to tear the cork out with her teeth, and definitely didn’t notice the solid second it took for Aron’s shoulders to- possibly forcefully- relax.

Except she definitely was and did, and puffed out a breath through her nose at Aron’s reaction. Good. She needed to keep Aron on her toes anyway. Or something like that.

If only the stupid bottle would-

“Um. …here,” Aron said quietly, holding out the other bottle. She’d already pulled the cork out. Nora paused, fixing her eyes on the bottle. After a second, she put the one she’d been wrestling one-handed in her pocket and took the offered one. And then promptly downed it, and before she could second-guess what she was doing, she grabbed the arrow and yanked it out as hard as she could- and it hurt.

But she wasn’t going to cry- not here, not in front of Aron, not while the healing potion was already making her want to scratch her whole shoulder clean off, not while she was gripping it in iron fingers with eyes scrunched and teeth bared and backed against the wall.

And then it was over, and she was fine.

She was fine.

Slowly, she took a breath, and then another, eyes still shut, head tilting back against the wall.

She didn’t want to have to acknowledge literally anything that happened in the past two minutes.

She didn’t want to acknowledge how stupid it had been to walk that close to the edge, didn’t want to acknowledge Aron swooping in, didn’t want to acknowledge the potions, Aron's reaction, none of it. At all.

Aron probably wouldn’t let her not acknowledge it in some form or fashion, but she still had the two of them sit in silence for as long as Aron could stand it.

…Which turned out to be a lot longer than Nora thought it would be. The silence stretched on, slowly becoming thick with awkward air that apparently neither wanted to address.

“Oh.”

Nora glanced up at the hushed statement. Aron was staring at the wall. Nora’s eyes followed the line of sight.

Embedded in the wall right above her head was redstone ore.

“Oh,” she echoed.

They stared at the redstone.

And then with a sigh, Nora pushed herself up, and then pulled her pickaxe out.

It turned out to be a decent-sized vein. Still not as much as she wanted, but at least it was something to work with. She could pull out now if she wanted to.

She glanced back at the torch.

…She didn’t want to have to come back for a while. She took in a breath, and looked over at Aron.

“I need more.”

Aron nodded, and then pushed herself up as well. After a moment, they broke the wall down and began clearing out mobs.

—-----

Too much time passed before Nora blinked back into her home. Aron had tried to say a goodbye once she realized Nora was leaving, though she hadn’t managed to get it out quick enough. But it was enough that Nora could tell what she was trying to say.

She wandered into her workroom, and looked around.

Despite her looking at everything in the room, she wasn’t really seeing it all, almost looking past the room as her mind sat and dwelled.

She really shouldn’t have accepted the help in the first place. She knew it was good that she did, in the end, and she knew she would have been in a lot worse of a spot if she hadn’t, and things would have been a lot more frustrating in different ways, but.

No matter how much she tried.

No matter how much she tried, Aron still tried harder. And it was so frustrating, because it was working.

Everything, everything- from the open lack of hostility despite everything Nora threw at her or didn’t, despite Nora trying to take them both down from the get-go, despite the words and the pushing and the anger- Aron still tried.

And the kicker was that it was genuine. Aron could be a tad idiotic going about it, but the genuine friendly intent was still there.

Nora inhaled for a long second, and then released slowly.

She walked to her desk, and pulled redstone out of her inventory, then paused when something shifted against her leg.

Her hand dug in her pocket, and pulled out the other health potion.

…This was why she didn’t like her.

Because even though she grabbed her mid-flight, she knew they wouldn’t crash.

Because even though she was rude, Aron wanted to help.

Because even though she shouldn’t, Aron wanted a name to call her by.

Because even though the universe pitted them against each other, Aron cared too much to let her fall.

Because even if their positions were swapped, Nora would have done the same.

Because even though Aron startling was good, she still felt guilty about scaring her.

She didn't like her because no matter how hard she tried not to, she did anyway.

Nora stared at the health potion.

She put it down.

She took a breath.

She got to work.

[steddieunderdogfics]

This week’s writer spotlight feature is:  MuseumGiftShopEraser! They have 9 works on AO3 in the Stranger Things Fandom, and 6 of those are in the Steddie tag!

Our anonymous nominator recommends the following works by @museumgiftshoperaser:

Paint the Devil on the Wall

Conversations About Love

Now I'm A Stranger

An Exercise In Denial

Baby, You Were Meant To Follow Me

Her fics are BEAUTIFUL. When I first read Paint the Devil on the Wall I was so obsessed I immediately recced the fic to everyone I knew who would be vaguely interested in a steddie fic. -- anonymous

Below the cut, @museumgiftshoperaser answered some questions about their writing process and some of their recommended work!

Why do you write Steddie?

I stumbled into it immediately after season 4 came out. I’ve felt very attached to Steve as a character from the beginning of the show and I think I was subconsciously waiting for someone to pair him up with. I think they’re both such great characters to explore themes of dealing with expectation (either by conforming, or fighting against it) and that’s something I always love to write about.

What’s your favorite trope to READ?

Absolute sucker for fake dating. Can’t get enough of it.

What’s your favorite trope to WRITE?

Enemies to lovers! Though now that I’m looking through my AO3 I haven’t actually written that much of it. It doesn’t have to be very intense enemies, though. I just like it when characters don’t immediately get along.

What’s your favorite Steddie fic?

My brain has been forever rewired by took you for a working boy by pukner. It’s such a gentle, nuanced queer story. It feels vulnerable to me in a way that really only fanfiction can be. Can I sneak in another one?? Because everyone should also absolutely read the shame is on the other side by scoops_ahoy. It taps into this very specific kind of queer compartmentalizing, that I’ve never seen written this well. It broke my heart and patched it right back up.

Is there a trope you’re excited to explore in a future work but haven’t yet?

I’ve been stupidly busy with my masters lately so there’s probably not a lot of writing on my horizon. I do have a wip called Doll that I’m slowly chipping away at. It’s a little darker than stuff I’ve written before. I know ‘dark’ isn’t really a trope, but I’m excited to see if I can push these characters a little further. 

What is your writing process like?

Absolute chaos. I write non-chronologically, without an outline, all in the same document. I keep writing snippets and scenes until the whole thing slowly comes together. 

Do you have any writing quirks?

Italicizing words for emphasis. I love it so much, you can rip it from my cold dead hands. It accidentally makes its way into my academic writing for my degree sometimes which is a little embarrassing, but I just love the flair of it. 

Do you prefer posting when you’ve finished writing or on a schedule?

I don’t really do schedules, it doesn’t work for me at all. I try to make sure I have a decent amount of the story written before I start posting to give me a bit of a head start, but forcing myself to finish something by a certain date is a surefire way to kill my motivation.

Which fic are you most proud of?

Probably Paint the Devil on the Wall. It was the first time I’d written the entire story before I started posting so it went through way more rounds of editing than normal. I think you can really tell. It’s also the longest story I’ve ever written (in general, even outside of fanfic). The whole project gave me a lot of confidence as a writer.

How did you get the idea for Paint the Devil on the Wall?

I knew I wanted to participate in the Bigbang and the deadline was coming up, but I still didn’t have an idea. I decided to work backwards and try to think of something that would be fun for the artist(s) to draw. I had a vision of Eddie wearing dungarees without a shirt, absolutely covered in paint and I knew I had to write something to make it happen. I set the story in 80s New York because neo expressionism is really the only kind of art I could see Eddie making. I think it suits him very well. I do actually have a background in art, though! I’m currently getting my MFA, but I’ve worked full time as an artist for several years before that. I had a lot of fun working my passion for art (and all those art history classes I had to take) into the fic.

When writing Paint the Devil on the Wall, what was something you didn’t expect?

All of Steve’s character, to be honest. The fic is written from Eddie’s POV and for a large part of it he has a very hard time figuring out what Steve’s deal is. Right alongside him, I also had an incredibly hard time figuring out his character. It wasn’t until I was working on the final chapter that he finally clicked for me. I realized very late, just like Eddie, that Steve liked him from the very beginning. Most of the enemies to lovers premise was all in Eddie’s head.

What inspired Now I'm a Stranger?

Oh boy, that was forever ago! I remember I started writing it while I was camping with friends because I liked having something to do after everyone went to bed at night. I think I had the idea for that very first scene where Steve doesn’t remember Eddie and it all sort of spiraled from there.

What was your favorite part to write from An Exercise in Denial?

That was the very first fic I wrote, right after season 4 came out! I’ve never written something that fast, I think the whole thing took me less than a week. My favorite part was probably Robin being completely exasperated with both of them. They’re such complete idiots in that fic.

How do/did you feel writing Baby, You Were Meant To Follow Me?

Ahhh… I never got around to finishing that one. I probably never will, to be honest. I wrote the first two parts quite quickly and then the idea I had for the plot spiraled out of control and I realized I didn’t actually feel like writing the rest of it. There were going to be a lot of misunderstandings and I learned that I find that an incredibly frustrating trope to write (when done for drama at least. For comedy, I’m a sucker for misunderstandings.) So I guess I felt a little in over my head.

What was the most difficult part of writing Conversations About Love?

The ending! That fic is so incredibly personal to me and I knew from the beginning that I wanted it to have a very sappy, happy ending. It was important to me to write an aromantic character getting everything they wanted, but I realized as I was writing it that I don’t actually fully know what that means. So it took a bit more soul searching than fics typically do, but it was very much worth it. 

Do you have a favorite scene and/or line from any of your fics?

I still think the short little prologue for Paint the Devil on the Wall is the best thing I’ve written. “You don’t draw on things that aren’t yours, baby” is probably the best summary I have for that story.

Do you have any upcoming projects or fics you’d like to share/promote?

Not really!

Thank you to our author, @museumgiftshoperaser, and our anonymous nominator! See more of @museumgiftshoperaser works featured on our page throughout the day!

Writer’s Spotlight is every Wednesday! Want to nominate an author? You can nominate them here!

[frozenjokes]

mermaid mumscarian. that’s all. I actually forgot to post the first chapter when I finished it, so congratulations tumblr, you get TWO helpings of dumbassery today.

snippet

***

When Mumbo returned, hungry and irritated about still being hungry, Scar was looking for clams. That seemed to be his favorite activity, sifting through the sand, digging up clams, piling them up, then at the end of day, scattering them back in the sand. Today, Scar was lining up his clams on the shore, letting them sit in the sun for whatever reason. Mumbo wondered if he ever planned on eating them, or if the clams were just toys to humans. Maybe Scar didn’t understand how to get inside them? Mumbo snorted, bubbles floating to the surface. Humans probably thought the clams would just open up for them if they waited long enough.

But not even his sour mood could withstand Scar’s bright smile as the human spotted Mumbo returning; its entire body lit up, every single encounter met with the same excitement as the first time it saw him. Sure, Mumbo was more easily flattered than most mermaids he knew, but anyone would break under the weight of that joy. Was Scar that excited to see everyone, or was it just him? He hoped Scar knew he felt similarly. He wished he could tell him.

Scar’s attention quickly shifted back to the sand though, bending over to sift through with a hand then plucking a clam out of the water. “Oooh this is a big one!”

Across the water, sitting on a rocky outcrop, Grian rolled his eyes. “Pretty sure you’ve shown me that same clam every day since you first got here.”

“It’s big though!”

“It is pretty big.”

“Do you think she’ll win?”

“The- did you finally remember to bring nail polish? And I don’t know, I’ll have to take a look at all of them before I decide.” Grian went back to fishing (and Mumbo was keeping a closer eye than he’d like to admit on the line), but Scar seemed satisfied, taking his bounty to the shore to line it up with the ten or so other clams.

“Well you’d better get ready, because our athletes are all lined up! They’re revving to go, Grian! You should look before they speed away! They’re chomping at the bit I tell you, they’re gonna run right away if you don’t come and look right now.”

Grian made a small noise of assent, not moving. “I'm in no rush.” He re-cast his line.

Scar huffed, trotting to his bag (which Mumbo couldn’t help but notice was placed very far from the shore, what was up with that anyway? Did they not trust him? They could trust him. Come on, no harm in putting them a little closer to the water..) and producing a small vial. Mumbo dragged himself a little closer to inspect it as Scar sat back with his clams. It smelled weird.

“What,” Mumbo said in human, another very useful word he’d learned, and Scar smiled, unscrewing the top.

“We paint our..” he paused, thinking, before gesturing to his dull claws, “Nails.” With the brush attached to the cap, he drew some of the brightly colored liquid inside across one of his ‘nails’, coloring it. Huh. So humans painted their skin just like mermaids did sometimes, very interesting. Unfortunately, Mumbo didn’t have the materials to show him. Scar examined his hand thoughtfully when he finished, throwing Mumbo a soft smile. “This won’t last. I’ll save it for the clams.”

With great care, Scar began to examine his clams one by one, picking them up and spinning them in his hands, saying something about names to Grian, then painting little symbols on the shells once they were dry enough. But why? Mumbo got the sense Scar was preparing them for something- to eat, maybe? Mumbo have never actually seen either human prepare any food; they seemed to bring pre-hunted meals with them every day. Was this.. part of the process..? Why in the world would they name their food?

Well. It was possible Scar wasn’t trying to eat and Mumbo was just thinking about food due to his own hunger. But then what was the point!

Apparently, the painting activity piqued Grian’s interest despite his previous dismissal, a common trend for that human it seemed. Despite holding a somewhat stubborn facade of disinterest, he was quick to contribute a name, and eventually, stopped fishing altogether to check out what Scar was working on.

“This one will be Jellie, the cutest, prettiest, fastest clam,” Scar said, practically shoving one of the clams in Grian’s face. Mumbo couldn’t quite make out the symbol painted on it, (none of the human symbols meant anything to him) but Grian seemed to understand, reaching insistently for the paint in Scar’s other hand. Scar held it out of reach, leaning away, but not without a smile on his face. “What? You don’t like Jellie?”

“Let me make one.”

“I thought you didn’t care about clam racing,” Scar grinned as he shoved back, Grian stumbling a bit in the sand before scrambling back to Scar, throwing himself across the other’s arms in a way that made Mumbo’s fins stand on end. What were they doing? Why were they fighting? Was it about food?

“You can’t put Jellie in the race without Maui and Pearl. At least one of them! I want to draw them.”

“There’s only so many slots for the race, Grian. I’m afraid your cats didn’t make the cut, very sorry, very very sorry.”

“You haven’t even painted all of them yet!” Grian said, in a tone that could have been a growl, though Mumbo had never heard a human make that noise before. Grian pushed at Scar’s face, and Scar laughed(?) hurriedly trying to cap the paint before he dropped it. Grian climbed onto Scar’s back, but as soon as the paint was secure, Scar fell backwards, howling as he crushed Grian in the sand behind him. Grian squeaked, the breath knocked from him, but it wasn’t long before he was squabbling under Scar’s weight, clawing and pushing and being very loud in tones that made Mumbo’s skin crawl. He had to stop them somehow- they were going to hurt each other!

[hyuckmov]

request #2: jaemin angst angst, that's pretty much it, some fluff, ends...ambiguously? wc: 2.3k a/n: THIS is not my best work...actually i feel like this is kind of bad and i was gna scrap it HOWEVER i felt bad for taking this long so i'm going to post this and then i might make up for it with another piece of jaemin angst sometime. this is loosely structured like 'the five times jaemin proposes to you (and the ....)' but it just felt kind of cruel of jaemin to propose 2 more times as per the trope and also i would have to write a lot more to fill in the gaps. <3 thanks for reading anywayyyy

jaemin first proposed to you on an autumn night. or rather, it was 11pm, you were closing up the empty cafe, and a boy had run in through the doors requesting one of the worst coffee orders you've ever heard of in your entire life, as a barista or not. 

"i have an assignment-" he makes out, breathless from the run. "it's due at 12. i just really really need to get my last thousand words in-" 

"last thousand?" you raise your eyebrows at him. he's pretty, is the first thing you notice. long lashes, long black hair falling over his eyes, a grandpa cardigan hanging off his broad shoulders. even as he's hunched over the counter, he tilts his head and you can see a lazy smile stretch across his face. it's a smile that makes you temporarily forget that it's fall and you're freezing cold. it's a smile that looks like summer. 

"last thousand." he confirms, the grin growing until it's cheshire-cat wide. 

"well then…" you turn around, starting to busy yourself with the espresso machine. "you had better order 2 cups, don't you think?" 

his laugh sounds out in the still air of the cafe. heading over to one of the counter seats, he props his chin up dramatically with one hand, his eyes going soft and round as he stares at you lovingly. "marry me," he sighs. 

and even though you respond with a light, "after you finish your assignment", he swears he can see your cheeks burning red when you pass him his coffee. 

x

"marry me, y/n." jaemin sighs. even from your view of him on videocall, the image slightly grainy from the darkness in his room, there's something endearing about watching jaemin recover from pulling an all-nighter. unable to keep his yawns in and rubbing sleepiness from his eyes, he sips lazily on a cup of iced coffee, blinking blearily up at his screen. there's something too tender about it, stinging lightly at your chest, that makes you look away. 

"you can't make that your catchphrase jaemin," you say, as easily as you can. "i'm going to get the wrong idea." 

without missing a beat, he beams at his webcam a huge smile. "alright then. but thank you so much for staying up with me, really." there's something unreadable in his expression, but it may just be the dimness of the room. 

"it's no problem," you give him a small smile. "breakfast in an hour?" 

"i'll pay."

x

"what do you think?" 

"jaemin, you're overthinking this," you soothe. "there's nothing wrong with that conversation, you're just being you."

"you're my best friend, that's a biased viewpoint," he whines. 

you're my best friend. steeling yourself, you try to shake the disappointment from your head. it had been a year since the two of you met, jaemin slowly worming his way into your life until he was irreplaceable. he had almost every meal with you. he knew things about you almost no one else did. you seemed to live your life twice: the first time as you actually experienced it and the second time relaying everything to him, as he did to you. 

you were so sure your feelings had faded — chalked up your feelings to him as inevitable, and soon to pass. until he started to incessantly bring up a girl he was paired with for a project, and you began to realise that maybe you never truly stopped liking him. 

clearing your throat, you squint at his phone screen, reading out: "dress warmly, it's getting cold outside. "see, that's a really sweet message!" shoving him in the shoulder, you bite back, "why don't you ever send me messages like that?" 

"that's not the point," he scowls. "she never replied after that." 

"maybe she just got busy," you pat him on the arm consolingly. 

"i'm too annoying," he grumbles, frowning at his phone as he locks it and throws it to the carpeted floor."dress warmly…who even says that? i'm just some guy from her lab project." 

"you're not just some guy," you insist. "have you seen yourself with lab goggles on? she was definitely just too giddy from your message to reply." 

as if on cue, his phone vibrates from where it lies on the floor. you reach over and pick it up, as jaemin buries his head in his couch cushions. 

"look!" you hold his phone out to him. 

peeking out from behind his fingers, his eyes scan the message. you're so sweet, thanks jaem! sorry for the late response, my phone battery died :( 

heaving a sigh of relief, he smiles sweetly down at his phone. "you were right." he reaches over and pulls you into the hug, snuggling his face into your hair. “y/n…"

"don't propose to me," you warn, and, because you're really his best friend…"save it for her one day." 

he beams up at you at that, but somehow the warmth of his smile burns ice cold all the way through you. 

x

in the car, you and jaemin are silent for almost all the way home. 

at first, it's a shocked silence, one that followed the two of you out of the restaurant and hung in the air for the first 5 minutes as you drove. 

when jaemin pulled out the ring in the middle of the restaurant — you watching from two tables down, your phone in your hand ready to record the moment for him, your heart pounding in your throat —, there had been a moment when you truly would have been fine with seeing her say yes. with walking up to congratulate them. with squeezing her hand tight and telling her to take care of your best friend. 

for a moment you had finally done it: talked yourself out of the heartache. filed away the memories of lazy afternoons spent lying on the floor of jaemin's room watching him obsess over science magazines. chipped through the love which had built up for years — the love that meant he could smile at you with a glow that felt like summer, which meant each time he craned his neck over to look at you through his lashes you felt your breath catch in your chest. 

for a split second, the notion that jaemin was getting married to the girl he met in his lab project 3 years ago had finally sunken in. even after third wheeling their dates for months, waking up in the middle of the night as jaemin panicked over fights he had with her, consoling him with a bitter taste in your mouth. it had taken a proposal and the specific sight of her hands over her mouth and eyes glistening to finally convince you that it was permanent. that he loved her. that he always would. 

until she shook her head. her hands coming away from her face, to make it even clearer. she shook her head again. she tugged at his shirt sleeve, trying to get him to stand up. whispering apologies to other diners in the restaurant. saying sorry to him before grabbing her purse and rushing out, avoiding his eyes the whole time. his eyes, round and wide, filled with hurt. 

in the car, you replay the moment in your head again and again. you're sure jaemin is doing the same thing. and its the thought of him being stuck in that moment forever that draws you to break the silence, reaching out to him with words. 

"i'm sure the two of you just need to talk it out," you try, making your voice as gentle as possible. you glance over at him, and he's staring resolutely at his hands. "it isn't an easy decision, maybe she's just overwhelmed." 

silence. he's still not looking at you, playing with the velvet box with his fingers. the defeated slouch of his shoulders prompting you to focus your eyes on the road ahead. because what could you say? guilt scrapes against your chest as you remember how it felt watching her leave, confusion and worry but also the faintest prickle of relief. 

"jaemin, everything is going to be okay, i promise you," you try again, as you pull the car into the driveway of your house. "look, it's not good for you to be alone right now, so just come in with me and i'll make you something to drink, and-" 

"marry me, y/n." 

at the words, you snap your head over to look at him. he's already staring at you, a harshness to his gaze that makes you want to back away from him. 

"what?" 

"marry me," he grabs your wrist roughly with one hand, beginning to pry open the ring box with the other. 

"jaemin what is wrong with you-" you struggle against him trying to pull your hands back, adrenaline rushing through you. 

"you love me, don't you?" he demands, trapping both your wrists in his hands. "you've loved me since college." 

your arms go slack. so he knew. 

"jaemin," you try again, all the breath seeming to have evaporated from your lungs. "let go of me, please." 

"you love me, so marry me," he continues as if you hadn't spoken. "isn't this what you want? you win, okay y/n?" 

"i don't want this," you raise your voice over his as slowly, you realise what he's implying. "i don't want to marry you, i only ever want to see you happy-" 

"you ruined this-" he spits at you, his words quickening. he lets go of your hands and runs them through his hair. "from the start i knew something was wrong. you picked out the date, you picked out the restaurant, you picked out the flowers-" 

"i was trying to help you-" 

"you even picked out this fucking ring." opening the box, he grabs it and holds it in front of you. his voice rising to a level you'd never heard, because jaemin never raised his voice at you, he shouts,"everything you did was just for yourself, you're so fucking delusional it makes me sick!" 

the sound rings in your ears, it seems to echo endlessly in the small space of the car. you're unable to breathe from how hard you're sobbing. you're aware that by not saying anything you're making things ten times worse, as if you had nothing to say for yourself, but it's the look of jaemin like this — his face twisted with anger, as if you were nothing more than a stranger, that hurt you so badly you couldn't make out the words.

your hands reach out for him, but you pull away because that just proves him right. 

"j-jaem, i would never… i never did that to you," the words sound pathetic even to you, but you can't think of anything else to say. because you loved him. even as you were sitting there, you still did. 

jaemin bites his lip in contempt. "whatever." 

grabbing your trembling hand, he shoves the ring onto your finger — ironically, it's a perfect fit. 

x

all rationality tells you not to open the door. but something in you always wanted a better goodbye. 

jaemin looks surprised to see you. he straightens from how he was slumped against the opposite door, hands shoved into his pockets. 

"did i wake you?" 

the concern in his eyes is too much for you to bear. "why did you come here?" 

swallowing, he exhales shakily. "i'm sorry." 

"not good enough." for the first time in all the time you've known him, you choose cruelty just as he did that day in the car. 

"i'm sorry for everything i said," he continues, stepping towards you, his gaze heavy with a seriousness you haven't seen since. "i don't even believe any of the things i said. everything i did was wrong."

the words sink in. of everything that he said, it's sickening to you how your heart practically aches to forgive him, begging you to throw your arms around him and tell him he's absolved of everything. you force yourself to stand your ground, digging your heels into the hurt that has accumulated over the past month, over the years. picking your words carefully, you look away.  

"it's stupid. but as much as i liked you, and maybe even loved you, i've never once heard you say those words in the way i wanted it." you take a deep breath. "and what you said that day… that's not the type of thing someone just forgives. you can't just take it out on me, leave for a month, and expect me to understand." 

"i know that," jaemin says, softly. 

there's a pause. 

"i'm going to head back in now," you hesitate. "if you don't have anything else to say." 

"wait, y/n-" he reaches out to grab your wrist, his grip immediately slackening into a gentle hold once you jolt. "let me try to make it up to you. i can't do anything without you, nothing feels right without you. i knew it from the moment i left…" he winces. "the moment i left the car, and i know it's going to feel wrong forever if i don't at least try to make it right with you." 

you can't rise above it, and you can't cut him out of your life like you wanted to so badly. because you couldn't be without him either. 

"call me tomorrow, and tell me again." meeting his eyes again, you tell him as firmly as you can. "i'm not forgiving you straight away but, just…call me again." 

"i will." and there it is, the faintest hint of a smile. and just as he turns to leave, he looks back at you. "and y/n… i'm sorry. for never saying it like you needed me to. for ruining things."

you tell him you're sorry too.

tags: @91qowngus, @sundhaelatte, @jaemboi64, @sassy-author

[im-a-moldy-bread]

Base off this post:

Idk where to go from here, so I will continue when idea's strikes. Or they upload a part two snd I can be free from my mind.

=================================

"We are married, by the way."

Huh? What is this man talking about.

I woke up with a pounding headache, and my body tied to a chair. As far as I can recollect, my nemesis, scaramouche had foiled my long term project in the akademiya again. Furious, I stormed my way to find him, and somehow get wrap up in an intense duel. I must have lost my consciousness during then.

When I opened my eyes again, I was in a dimly lit storage room. The rope was very tight and any big movement would cause it to suffocate my skin. Realising it a futile attempt, I quickly look around my surrounding when the wooden door creak open.

It was scaramouche. Internal panicking, my mind jump to amnesia. Yea he will completely believe me if I told him I forget everything..

"Well you're finally awake. I did not think you would lower your guard so simply."

I stared at hin with confusion, or at least I hope that how it would appear to be. "Hey mister, where am I? I felt like I just woke up from centuries of sleep. I can't remember who am I, or what's my name."

He stared at me, albeit a bit taken aback. Since like I have quite the talent in acting. "What games are you playing? You think that would help you escape?"

"Escape? Mister, are you the one who tied me up? Are you someone I know? Uhh whoever you are, I'm very sorry if I done something to warrant your actions. Can you explain the situation a bit?"

His questioning gaze was gone, after all i almost never apologise, not to him anyway. "Stop calling me that, just call me scara the way you always insist to."

He paused for a moment before continuing. "We are married, by the way." He get down on his knees to untie the rope.

Wait. WHAT.

This wasn't part of the script. What do you mean we are married??? Plus who even ties up their lover onto a chair??? Could this be another scheme of his??? Wait what will he even gain by claiming I was married to him???

My brain was still processing this development when he finish untying me. "Are you okay dear?" He stared at me nonchalantly. He called me that as if he been calling me that for the last century. What happen to "insignificant insect" and "unsightly worm"???

My lips were sealed for a second as I think carefully about how to reply him. "Mis- I mean Scara, you are saying you are my husband? Then can you explain why am I here, all tied up?" Let's see how you get out of this.

He nods. "One of my enemies blackmail me with your life. No worries, I have already took care of them." He helps me get up like the caring husband he claimed to be.

"I..I see, that explain why I have some burns on my arm..."

"They must've hurt a lot." He gently go over the burns. "I am going to make sure whoever did this will wish they were never born."

It was you. It was your electric shocks. I never realise you can spew so many lies so naturally. Seems like he will also be a formidable enemy if I ever pursue an acting career. Nonetheless, I still have to held back until I escape from this rundown storage.

"Scara, uhmmm if you truly are my husband, can I ask for some food?" Gosh why does that word roll off the tongue.

It was very brief, but a blush definitely painted his porcelain cheeks. "Ah come on let's get some Fatteh at the market place."

[simulation-machine]

SIMS RELATED PROJECTS/UPDATES

My spring break is coming up in a week and holy crap do I have plans on plans on plans, especially since my summer is gonna be full of school + internship + HOPEFULLY friggin' graduating with a BA in Psychology so that I can start applying to grad schools.

Read more iffin' you'd like! It's long! Here's a picture of my golden retriever napping on her brother's food bowl to entice/entertain you:

god she is so precious i would literally kill for her

GOAL 1: MASTER GSHADE/ReSHADE

I know that some people are sticklers for this but my thing is that I had no gee-dee clue what I was doing with ReShade, whereas Gshade just kinda clicked and worked for me? That said I have a bunch of resources for learning ReShade so I might end up moving back to it at some point.

My main issue is figuring out the order of all the different effects. It obviously matters, I'm sure people smarter than me have tried to use presets only to be like "why tf does this look absolutely nothing like the baller screenshots this one cool Simblr has?" Annnd it turns out it's order + remembering to turn off certain graphic settings. Also photoshop, but that's gonna take a lot longer for me to figure out lol.

Like I'd been struggling to figure out why @gunthermunch's gorgeous Lithium preset wasn't looking as sexy as it did before annnnd it's because I forgot to turn Edge Smoothing off when switching to it. Jesus wept at how dippy I am sometimes.

Eventually, what I would like to do is maybe make my own preset at some point? I would be kind enough to show the effect order too if I did so. But this requires so, so much more shader knowledge than I currently have.

FUN FACT: My first ever degree was in art, I even went to a very fancy and private art school (School of the Art Institute of Chicago if you're curious)- I dropped out after one semester because uhhh that shit is expensive. Ended up finishing my degree at a much cheaper location in MN. That said, my art was 100% analog and 2D, and it turns out it did not translate super well into trying my hand at graphic art.

It's funny because I've been gifted really neat stuff for graphic art (like a really nice Wacom tablet and Adobe subscriptions), like people just expected my mixed-media ass would know what to do with it. NOPE! But yeah, Sims is sort of my excuse to try my hand at this stuff again, especially since I have a bit more energy now that my soul is not regularly being drained out of my body by customer service and tech support jobs.

GOAL 2: GET CRACKIN' ON ANOTHER DOOR

This one is hard because I am only on Gen 2 of the Orsons and it's sort of hard to justify starting up another story while that one is less than 1/5 of the way done.

THAT SAID, I don't plan on posting Another Door until I have a decent chunk of it done. Since it's not a casual gameplay story nor a legacy challenge, I plan on editing the bajeez out of the screenshots for it, really honing in on the aesthetic. I want it to look and feel very different from my random legacy challenge.

Fortunately, this story has been fucking up my sleep schedule for *months* now and I have a lot of the writing for it done. The hard part is translating that into the Sims, making sure I get the right poses and stuff, maybe even learning how to make some super easy CC (like, posters and stuff), and stuff related to GOAL 1 above.

What I'm saying is that it's going to take a bit. But I'm super serious about sharing it because it's my obsession and honestly the first time a story of my own design has possessed me in literal years.

Also, I want to make sure I have a significant backlog of the Orsons before I start seriously simming for it, because I don't want to screw over my favorite little pixel babies. This legacy challenge is going to be the one, I have done so much to keep my save files to keep it safe from harm (ask me how many backups I have of the save files. JK don't, the number is frankly silly).

GOAL 3: START YET ANOTHER MASSIVE CC PURGE

Y'all, my CC folder for this game is honestly an embarrassment. I go so hard on CC shopping because this community is stupid-talented and I like giving my pixel babies nice things and cool looks. When I'm bored and not quite in the mood for gameplay, I just like making neat-looking sims that I do absolutely nothing with because I love fucking around in CAS.

I have built my own PCs since I was 17 years old, and when I first built COMPUTERMACHINE (current rig) back in the autumn of 2018, it was with the goal that it would run Sims 4 flawlessly no matter what I did to it. It's got ridiculous amounts of RAM, I religiously update parts for it. And to be fair, even with the current 6,907,907,890 TB of CC I have atm it runs better than Sims 3 ever had with a measly 50 GB of CC.

But for me, it comes down to finding all the stuff I wanna use. Making myself get rid of the stuff I don't wanna use. Straight up yeeting the CC that I thought was going to look incredible that uh, didn't deliver.

I do CAS CC purges about once a year but have literally never done it for Build & Buy stuff, because OMG some of this shit I've had since 2014. Like when Sims 4 first came out. YIKES. My CAS CC obsession is notable but it's honestly nothing compared to my Build & Buy. Even before For Rent made building lots slow af, my PC was starting to take a solid minute to switch to different buy categories.

It would take a long af time so I want to make sure I have a bunch of content in the queue before I do it. It's gonna be a whole ass thing and be so, so boring to do. So I'm putting it off for when I have a ton of time to do it. Like, oh, my entire Spring Break?

GOAL 4: MAKE A FRIGGIN' RESOURCES LIST ALREADY

This would obviously need to wait until after GOAL 3 is completed, but I wanna make sure the awesome creators whose stuff I use get credit, and that people know where they can grab neat stuff. It would include not only CC but mods, Gshade/ReShade presets, and maybe even lots and sims I've downloaded from the gallery?

(Since I am super anti-paywall and very unapologetic and rude about it, I will also share where one could perhaps get some of these CCs without paying some dip a Trenta Starbucks Unicorn Frappucino amount of $$$)

It's ambitious as hell because *gestures vaguely at GOAL 3* but it would make things like doing WCIF asks and lookbooks so much easier.

Somewhat relatedly, I wanna make a navigation post, especially once Another Door starts getting posted. That story is gonna be a bit huge with multiple arcs that take place over the course of like, 14 years. Plus once the Orsons get to the 4th+ generation, it would be easier to track things down.

IN CONCLUSION...

I have been having so much fun sharing my silly little Sim adventures on Tumblr, so much more than I ever thought I would! You all have been so great to me, and all of this stuff is sort of a way for me to repay that. Ever since I stopped being able to be artistically creative ever since a really nasty depressive spell in 2017, Sims has been my #1 artistic outlet. And having people who are even somewhat entertained by my pixels is incredibly motivating.

Basically, if you read all of this, DAMN would you have been a rad livejournal follower of mine circa 2007. On the seriousness, however, thank you all so much for being rad and encouraging and sweet. I promise to do you all, if not proud, then at the very least not disappointed.

Time to hit the bong and take some pictures of Lou and Tatertot before taking my IRL doggos on a walk~