#every thought i have ever thought about is all coming back to me now đ anyway yes youngk!! cannot wait to hear him sing again
Remedy
Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3
Pairing: Satoru Gojo x reader
content tags: slow burn, enemies to lovers, gojo being an ass (whatâs new lmao), arranged marriage, clan issues
Warnings: NSFW mdni, toxic relationship, heartbreak, self doubt and insecurities, rough oral sex, m!receiving, f!receiving, praise kink, light punishment kink, rough blowjob, no actual sex yet, this is my first time writing smut so bear with me ok đ, not proofread tbh, buckle up this is one heck of a ride :))
A/n: Iâm not sure how many parts this will have as of now (kind of going with the flow)
Summary: When Gojo confessed his feelings for you, you couldnât have been any happier - you were a fool
Word count: 8.3k
âShut up, Satoru. Or weâll get caught.â, you giggle into his neck.
âWhat are you gonna do, hmm?â, he grins and his hands wrap tightly around your waist pulling you closer towards him, the giddy feeling in your stomach only increasing with every minute you guys spend together.
The both of you have rarely spent time apart, ever since your engagement party three months ago, almost every day, youâd hang out and go on several dates. Itâs almost too good to be true but here you were all shits and giggles and embracing whatever comes next as long as heâs here, with you.
Right now you were in an unoccupied class room, skipping a class, prefering to hang out with each other more.
You roll your eyes at his mischievous smile and kiss him: âI can do that?â, you plant several kisses down his jawline up to his neck, his grasp tightening around you and you were sure you almost heard him whimper when you reached a spot right above his collarbone.
He chuckled nervously: âNow, come on, sweetheartâ, he clears his throat and takes a step back, his face flushed and a certain uncertainty sparked in his eyes.
You take that as a cue that you were breaching a boundary and awkwardly step back as well; the slight sting in your chest was almost like a slap to the face, an insecurity you thought had vanished is gnawing at the back of your head but you respected him and his wishes - if he wanted you to stop, you would.
âHey,â, he stares at you contemplating, something for a second - did he see the doubt building inside of you? If yes, he chose to ignore it, because soon after he grabs your hand and nudges you to follow him outside, his reasoning being âwe wouldnât want to miss all of our classes today.â.
You shrug the gnawing feeling off of you, not wanting to be so insecure in your relationship so early on and cause unnecessary drama, you just need to get yourself sorted out. You let him drag you outside to your next class, in the meantime you try to dissolve the mess inside your head - maybe if you ignored it, it would disappear.
When Satoru turns towards you, you quickly smile at him and he winks at you; he lets go of your hand and instead wraps his arm around your neck.
âThereâs this nice restaurant in Shibuya, if you want to we can go check it out after school. Maybe a little shopping beforehand?â, he kisses the side of your head, âHow does that sound?â.
âYour treat?â, you grin at the mention of a date and were already gushing about what to wear in your head - you had to call Haname for help later.
âOf course, my treat. Anything for my girl.â, he smiles at you, your cheeks flush and you slightly hit him as some sort of compensation; you were so flustered at being called âmy girlâ you fail to notice the slight guilt glimmering in his eyes.
Right now, you were so content with everything, you almost start to skip in your steps (girl is head over heels istg đ).
If somebody had asked you, when did you fall for Satoru, you didnât have the answer, it had just been building up over the years - heck maybe you always had cared for him you just didnât notice? Maybe it was hidden behind the teasing you had grown to adore him. But even that seemed unimportant in the face of the warm spring breeze, it made you think, no matter what, the flowers would always end up blooming, despite whatever they are going to face.
When the classes are over Satoru drops you off at your dorm and you immediately go take a shower and call Haname over.
âThis dress?â, you show her a black shoulder free dress that went up to your knees with a small slit reaching the mid of your thighs, âor this dressâ, now you held up a baby blue colored dress with slightly loose sleeves at your hands with a heart shaped neckline that reached mid thighs - the black one is elegant, the blue one more cute.
She contemplates both options: âYouâre also going around the mall, right?â
You nod.
âBaby blue.â
The anxiety in your chest gnaws at you: âWhat if itâs really fancy and I end up being underdressed?â
She gives you a quick glance - probably questioning where you left your head - before shaking her head: âYou can still style it with your jewelry because if you guys are gonna walk around first the baby blue one is the better fit. I can imagine it gets very uncomfortable in the black one really fast.â
You sigh in frustration and bite your lip: âIâm overthinking this, arenât I?â, you sat down next to her, you were being completely irrational but you just wanted everything to be absolutely perfect.
She gives you a small sheepish smile: âJust a teensy tiny bit.â, she gestures with her hand to show you exactly how tiny and you chuckle with a slightly nervous undertone.
âI just- I donât want to make a mistake, make it go back to the point we didnât talk for months.â, you look down playing with your fingers, you felt like you had just cracked open the window in the cold winter night; exposing your ugliest and deepest thoughts you had so desperately tried to ignore.
She quickly wraps her arms around you in comfort: âDo you really think Satoru is so shallow to break up with you over a dress?â, she holds you at arms length now and stares at you, analyzing you, âthereâs more to it, isnât there?â
You nod slightly - god voicing it out loud makes you realize just how ridiculous you probably sound right now - you let out a shaky breath: âWhat if Iâm not good enough? Iâm not her and no matter how hard Iâll try, I will never be her.â
âDid he tell you that? Because I swear to-â, she immediately gets up, preparing herself to beat up Satoru but you quickly grasp her hand and stop her from doing anything reckless.
âNo, he didnât, he never would.â, you shake your head violently, âI just feel like I have to compensate because he gave her up for me.â
She scoffs: âDear, I love you, but you are being very dumb right now.â, her hand runs through her hair in frustration, âhe didnât give her up for you, he chose you. There is a difference.â
âI know, Iâm being ridiculous but I canât help but feel that way.â, the stone in your chest keeps getting bigger and you start to wonder when youâll finally burst.
âDid you talk to him, tell him about this insecurity?â
You shake your head and you swear sheâs about to hit you for your idiocy but decides against it, instead she firmly grabs your arms and shakes you.
âTalk. To. Him.â
âGods, no.â, your eyes widened as if she was the one being ridiculous now.
She deadpans: âYouâre hopeless.â
âThanks.â, you reply sarcastically.
âWhy wonât you tell him?â, she asks in such confusion - heâs your boyfriend, you should be able to tell him how you feel.
âItâll pass, he doesnât need a confirmation seeking, untrusting girlfriend.â
She sighs, like she gave up: âYou should really work on your self-esteem.â
âCan we drop it now? Itâs just passing thoughts, by tomorrow they are gone.â, you clear your throat unsure if you could even believe yourself right now.
âAre they really gonna pass or will they be buried so deep, you wonât ever acknowledge them again.â
You wink at her and then stand up to grab your curling iron. Your hair doesnât get done by itself.
She gives you a look of disapproval but takes the curling iron out of your hand.
âIâll do your hair, you can focus on your makeup.â
You smile at her and get yourself ready.
Once youâre finished you give yourself a nod of approval.
âYou look hot and cute- if he doesnât eat you out today i donât know.â, she grins.
You bite the inside of your cheeks - will he? Or will he stop like all the other times you initiated something?
You shake your head in a weak attempt to get rid of your intrusive thoughts, he isnât ready to go all the way with you, you shouldnât push him.
âYouâre right.â, you grin, maybe if you pretend to be fine, youâll actually be fine in the end.
When youâre done you message Satoru, that youâre ready to go out and a few minutes later heâs already knocking at your door.
You glance at Haname, she gives you a thumbs up and you finally manage to open the door, your heart thumping so loudly, you can barely hear your own breath.
Upon the sight of you Satoru halts mid-greeting: âYou look absolutely stunning.â, he kisses your cheek and hands you a bouquet of black dahlias.
âThanksâ, the tension in your shoulders slowly dissipates, âyou look very handsome yourself.â, you grin at him and smell the flowers: âThey look so pretty and smell so nice.â
âJust thought they looked pretty, like you.â, he grins smugly.
Your face flushes and you cough a little out of embarassment; you gesture for him to enter while you quickly put them in a vase.
He smiles at you and waves at Haname upon seeing her before he grasps your hand and drags you out of the door and yells: âIâm kidnapping this one.â
You shake your head at his antics and laugh: âYou never change, do you?â
âNever.â, he smiles but the cold glint in his eyes betrays him.
You felt like an idiot - of course you just had to say the wrong thing - you knew what he went through when Geto decided to walk away.
âIâm sorry if I hit the wrong button.â, you squeeze his hand as a form of apology.
âItâs okay. Itâs not your fault.â, he smiles and squeezes your hand back in return.
When you both reach the car, he opens the door for you and walks to the other side and sits down beside you in the backrow. He tells the driver to drive to the mall and pick you guys up at 6.
The drive takes longer than you had initially expected, the city bustling with people and cars due to the weather getting warmer, you donât necessarily mind, still fascinated by the little things in life.
Your gaze follows the children playing around with each other, friends talking together - having fun; sometimes it just shakes you up that each one of these people had their own life, their own stories and you wish you could hear them all.
âWhatâs got the cogs in your head all running?â, Satoru shakes you out of your thoughts.
âAll of them, out thereâ, you nod towards the crowd, âtheyâre all living their lives, have their own perspectives, theyâre their own main characters. Itâs nothing new but the realization is so odd sometimes.â, you shrug at him, secretly you hoped heâd understand, even join you in such a philosophical topic - get a glimpse inside whatâs going on in his head.
He smiles at you and leans his head towards you, one of his eyebrows raised: âYou mean, like realizing not everything revolves around you?â, you inhale a sharp breath, he said it with such a sweet tone and yet it felt like such a passive aggressive dab at you.
You stay silent for a few seconds, considering your next words carefully, it seemed like thatâs all you do around him recently - walk on eggshells - your inner self laughs at you demeaningly - is this how youâre supposed to feel like in a relationship? You interrupt yourself before it gets worse - no bad thoughts tonight.
âI didnât mean that.â, you almost scoff, slightly offended, but you hold it in, maybe he didnât notice how provocative he sounds.
He raises an eyebrow: âmaybe you didnât say it outright, but you clearly meant it.â
You sigh: âLetâs not start fighting about a mere observation.â, you tense up slightly.
He chuckles: âYour wish is my command.â
Finally the driver pulls into the parking lot and youâre more than happy to get out of the car and get a fresh breath of air. Distraction is what you both probably need right now.
Satoru waves goodbye to the driver and you quickly fix your dress before you step in, Satoru close behind you.
âAnything specific you want to check out?â, he grabs your hand and gives it a small kiss.
âI was thinking about new dresses. We have to attend many family gatherings this month and then there's our annual big sponsor announcement - we need to get you a suit.â, you contemplate if thereâs anything else you need but decide thatâs it for today.
He groans: âCanât we just stay at home and cuddle instead?â
You chuckle at him and squish his face: âNo. If itâs any consolation, though, we can cuddle afterwards.â, you grin.
He sighs playfully: âAt least something good is coming out of these family events.â
âYâknow we donât need family gatherings to cuddle? You can just come over.â, you suggest, maybe he would finally be the one to initiate some romantic action.
âIâll think about it.â, he hums playfully; leaving you incredibly frustrated again - the nagging sensation that had been nestling in the back of your head had reappeared - why did he always almost entirely refuse any type of intimacy between you?
You nudge him while you roll your eyes - donât show him your worries - you repeat almost like a mantra in your head.
âIs there anything you want to check out?â, you ask him, completely open to anything he wants to do, really, you just wanted to finally cross the bridge thatâs almost always holding you at armâs length away from each other.
âNot really, just want to spend the day with you.â, he smiles, âNow letâs go get you some pretty dresses.â
You smile, albeit, a little more coldly than youâd like to admit and you both look around the different shops.
Several shops and try-ons later you had a few dresses, Satoruâs suit in several different bags, all held by Satoru. You still were in the cabin trying on your last dress - a long red backless V-cut dress - youâd probably wear this to the sponsor event, itâs a little eye-catching but thatâs how itâs supposed to be and it looked good.
Leaving the cabin you were about to turn when you see Satoru on his phone; you call out his name and he slightly tenses up and quickly puts his phone away.
You narrow your eyes in suspicion but decide to ignore it and do a little twirl: âWhat do you say?â
He gets up from his seat and walks around you, blowing a whistle: âYou look breathtaking, absolutely stunning.â, he grins, âno man would be able to keep your eyes off you and then in despair, theyâd have to realize that sheâs taken to this dashing young man.â, he gestures at himself and you let out an amused chuckle.
âYouâre unbelievable.â
âYou love it.â, he winks.
âUnfortunately.â, you sigh playfully.
âNow, hush.â, he rushes you back into the cabin, âwe have a reservation at 6:30.â
You laugh: âSince when do you care about punctuality?â
He gasps in mock-offense: âSince always!â
âSure.â, you hum in complete disbelief and quickly take off the dress and give it to Satoru to pay for it.
While he pays for it you change into your normal dress and get out, waiting for him outside. Soon he steps outside and you guys walk to the parking lot where your driver should be.
He whines as soon as he steps into the car: âI forgot how exhausting shopping is.â
âIt wasnât that bad. Besides, you suggested it!â, you nag him.
âYes, I did, that doesnât make it any less exhausting.â , he pouts in all his 6 foot 3 glory and you chuckle.
âYouâre such a child.â, you grin.
He scoffs: âIâm not!â
âOf course you arenât, my big baby.â, you coo mockingly and pinch his cheek like a grandma.
He lightly slaps your hand away and grins: âDonât hurt the masterpiece.â
âThe masterpiece should get a hold of his ego.â, you roll your eyes, a comfortable feeling engulfs you - when had you been this comfortable the last time?
He winks: âYou can get a hold on this ego.â, you almost scoff - is this the same man that cockblocks you and himself all the time?
You decide to be bold, test the waters: âWhat if I do?â, your shoulders tense up slightly, the fear of another rejection never disappearing.
His eyes widen slightly and he starts to chuckle nervously: âNow, love, behave, our driver can hear us.â and your face flushes in embarrassment but it doesnât stop you from not understanding the underlying subtone - another rejection.
You start to wonder just how long youâll be able to hold in your feelings; it wasnât getting any easier, not when any attempt to take a step he takes two steps back, it was frustrating to say the least, made you feel like he didnât actually want you and it was slowly but surely suffocating you.
âWhen will you let me in?â, you mumble, tired of this back and forth you lean your head against the window and decide to close your eyes for a bit; maybe he had heard you, maybe he hadnât, you donât know - the rest of the drive is silent.
It seems like you dozed off during the latter half of your drive because you wake up to Satoru gently shaking your shoulder and telling you, you had arrived.
You nod and get up still slightly out of it so when you get out of the car, youâre a little dizzy and lean on Satoruâs chest, you can hear his breath hitch a little.
âYou okay, sleepyhead?â, he chuckles and you nod.
âJust a second.â
âTake all the time you need, love.â , he smiles and wraps his arms around your waist to secure you.
After a few more seconds in the fresh air your sleepiness finally disappears and youâre ready to go in.
âAlright, Iâm ready.â, he gives you a quick glance, probably confirming for himself, if you are actually ready and then guides you inside, his one hand not leaving your waist.
The both of you step inside and youâre fascinated by its glimmering aesthetic of black and gold, it was elegant and prestigious, absolutely beautiful, the tables each decorated with wonderful ornaments that suited the restaurant's interior design - just how did you never hear of this place?
A waiter welcomes you and asks for your name, then guides you to a table with Gojoâs name on it and leaves you to settle in and check out the menu.
You gush at Satoru: âJust how did you know about this place?â
He smiles, yet it was more of a painful smile: âI came here with someone once.â
Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion: âWho?â, and then it hit you; her, it had to be Hiyori, heâd never take anyone else to this type of restaurant, your teeth clench together and you grip the edge of your seat tightly, you were absolutely furious - did he have to take you to a restaurant where he previously went with his ex? âYou have to be kidding me.â, you deadpan, you didnât want to fight, not today, never actually, but how much longer are you supposed to feel like the second option, the one that will always remind him of what he could have had, the one that will never be enough for him.
Thereâs only so much you can tolerate.
âItâs not how you think it is.â, he attempts to grasp your hand but you immediately slap it off.
âYou were here with her.â, you raise an eyebrow, you were stating the obvious, hell anyone that knew him would figure it out.
âI- yes, but it doesnât mean anything to me. Itâs a nice restaurant that I wanted to show you. Nothing else.â, he justifies himself and you almost canât believe him - he doesnât even realize just what this implies.
âSatoru, the only thing, stopping me from immediately getting out of here, is that I donât want to draw attention to us.â, you click your tongue, you knew this rage would turn into pain sooner or later but right now youâd rather feel angry than drown in self-pity and misery.
âJust-â
âHave you decided what youâd like to order?â, the waiter from earlier shows up and stares at Satoru with his notepad in his hand.
He starts to speak up: âNo-â
âYes, Iâd like a glass of sparkling water and your Wagyu Steak, can you also add a Caesar Salad for the both of us?â, you smile at the waiter and for the first time this evening he looks at you instead of Satoru and you swear you can see him falling right here and now for you, as if his slowly reddening cheeks didnât give him away.
âYes, of course, anything for you.â, he smiles, from the corner of your eyes you can see Satoru clench his jaw and angrily tap his fingers on the table; you almost laugh out loud - he had the audacity to be jealous, now? The waiter's gaze lingers a little longer than necessary on you and you just keep looking back, normally you wouldnât act like this - so immature but the bitter aftertaste his ex left on your relationship just made you act in ways youâd never had before. The waiter seems to finally snap out of it when Satoru clears his throat, absolutely furious at him or you - you didnât care; let him. He smiles nervously: âAnd what can I get for you, sir?â
âSame as hers.â, he replies curtly, looks like he wants to get him away from the table as fast as possible.
The waiter nods and steps back but not without catching another glance at you.
âCould you stop playing into his desire for you?â, he scowls and you scowl right back.
You were about to play a dangerous game but god you wanted him to feel the same way you did, make him suffer just as much and the opportunity was handed to you on a silver platter.
âHe was merely taking my order.â, you roll your eyes.
âYeah, sure, he was.â, he replies, his voice dripping with sarcasm and he leans forward, âYouâre mine, donât think some small waiter has a chance.â
You gulp, fuck that was hot, youâd even tease him back if you hadnât been so mad, so hurt.
âIâm not your property.â
âNo, but youâre wearing my ring.â, his darkened eyes brimming with anger, jealousy, it might sound pathetic but seeing him like this, finally made you feel wanted, the feeling you had craved for so long, feeding the insecure monster inside of you - the amount of power you let him have over you was absolutely dangerous.
Soon the waiter comes back with your drinks, Satoruâs scowl only deepens upon his sight and either the waiter didnât notice or simply didnât care because he still gives you a friendly smile and you give him a simple âthanksâ.
âAnything else I can do for you whilst the food is being prepared?â, he mostly looks at you, letting the âangry Gojo potâ almost overflow.
You smile back and order two glasses of their finest champagne.
âYesâ, he clicks his tongue in absolute anger, and demands, âgive me a waiter that doesnât wonder whatâs under my fiancĂŠeâs pants.â
âSatoru!â, and he looks at you with such intensity, almost daring you to speak up against him and for a second you wonder who the man in front of you is.
The waiter chuckles nervously, trying to calm down the situation but Satoru wouldnât have any of it: âUnless you want to lose your job, do as I say.â, he was challenging him, Satoru was beyond pissed and some twisted side of you couldnât get enough of it.
The waiter quickly leaves and you give him an apologetic glance, earning another angry glare from Satoru.
âYouâre overreacting.â, you deadpan.
âIâm not.â, how his teeth havenât shattered by how hard heâs clenching his jaw, remains a mystery.
âAre we ever gonna come here again?â, you cautiously ask.
âFuck no.â, he shakes his head almost immediately, ânever again.â
âDo you finally understand why Iâm angry that youâre taking me to the same place you took your ex to?â
His eyes widened just slightly, almost unnoticeable, but you noticed and he nods.
You smile at him awkwardly: âfeels shitty, doesnât it.â
âYeah, Iâm sorry.â, he bites his lips, finally some sort of rationality is getting to him.
âJust donât do it again.â, you sigh, wanting to get rid of the sour mood on the table, âyou look incredibly hot when youâre jealous.â, you glance at him innocently.
âDonât do it again, or I might end up killing someone.â, he groans.
You chuckle: âtoughen up, loser.â
He rolls his eyes playfully: âYouâre unbelievable.â
âYou love it.â, you grin back.
He grins back, his eyes sparkling in the light of the restaurant and for a few minutes you forget the underlying issues, hiding like mines in the field, waiting for anyone to step on them and get them to explode, leaving only destruction behind.
You take a sip from your champagne and enjoy the bubbling taste swirling on your tongue.
âAny plans for tonight?â, the curiosity gnaws at your throat and you stare at him, slightly tensed; were you being greedy? Maybe, nonetheless it doesnât stop you from asking questions youâll most likely end up regretting upon hearing their answer.
âNoâ, he smiles gently, âonly plans with you.â, you ease up, except the piling mass of frustration that chained you down like a madman, didnât really let you.
Even if the universe wanted you to be at peace, youâd be its biggest enemy. Just why canât you have faith in his feelings for you; why did it always end up with you second-guessing him or yourself.
âGoodâ, you chug down the glass of champagne, letting the fizziness drown out your inner distraught.
He chuckles, oblivious to what is going on inside your head, âeager much?â
âItâs just-â, you lick of the remains of it from your lips, âreally goodâ.
He simply lifts up his hand and orders another one for you.
Your dinner is served very quickly and you enjoy the rest of the evening in the restaurant.
Time passes quickly and youâre already about to step into your dorm, the question falls off your lips before you can even think about it: âDo you want to come in?â
Heâs hesitating, you see it in the way he glances outside and the way he is biting the inside of his cheek.
âYou donât have to- mere courtesy, really.â, you spit out nervously, the feeling of walking on eggshells is washing over you again.
âNo, I want to.â, thereâs pity in his eyes, you know heâs lying, god you almost want to take back your question, you hated it when he looked at you like this, if you werenât so desperate for any type of attention from him, youâd maybe actually respect yourself and stop begging for his attention, but you donât, you push it down for your next cycle of self-hatred.
You grab a pair of joggers and a shirt that are way too large for you and hand it to him, âin case you want to get into something more comfortableâ, you mumble, not really looking at him.
He sighs and disregards the clothes in your hand, this time almost immediately noticing something is wrong with you, he grabs your face and gently strokes your cheek: âWhatâs wrong, doll?â, concern fills up his eyes.
âItâs nothing, really.â, you wrap your hand around the hand that is caressing your cheek and gently squeeze it, you donât want him to know about your ugly thoughts.
He furrowed his eyebrows, clearly not believing you, âI canât fix what I donât know about.â, thereâs still that concerned tone in his voice but you canât deny the underlying annoyance hidden in between.
You bite your lip, an internal battle unfolds, you donât want him to be annoyed with you but your carefully manufactured armor of false self confidence was crumbling and any hit would be fatal to your general well-being.
After a few seconds, he seemed to grow impatient, with a deep sigh he finally slips out of the embrace.
No- in the spur of the moment you grab his arm, stop him from leaving you, the final hit shatters your armor and you take a deep breath.
âSometimes I feel like this relationship is so one-sided.â, you gulp, you donât want to look him in the eyes.
âWhat the fuck do you mean, y/n?â, he asks softly, his voice laced with confusion.
âIt feels like I have to beg for your affections, Satoruâ, you finally muster up the courage to look him in the eyes but the intensity in them made you look down again, youâre feeling way too vulnerable for your own comfort.
He grabs your chin, his breath heavy, forcing you to look him in the eyes. He analyzes every single aspect of your face: âFor how long have you been feeling that way?â, he croaks.
âI donât know.â, you shrug.
âWhy have you never told me? Have you ever even considered telling me? Or did you just plan to bury it down until youâd be tired of it and simply break up with me?â, he didnât raise his voice but it sure as hell made you feel like he was yelling at you, scolding you like a child.
âI donât want to have to speak about this. Just what is so hard about showing me you actually care about me?â, you bite your lips, you didnât want your date night to end up in an argument, but youâd be lying to yourself if you didnât feel good about finally spilling what haunts you in the late hours of the night.
He seems to contemplate his next action and you keep staring at him, waiting for him to decide, keep arguing or acknowledge what youâve been feeling and trying to suppress for so long.
You anxiously stare at him, the clock was ticking, the room so silent it equaled a firework, add in the light tapping of your foot on the floor, you sensed a headache incoming, especially if this doesnât get resolved fast now that itâs in the open.
Another sigh, a step closer to you, you wanted to step back, but your body was not your own anymore, not really, you had just been a doll, in the hands of the doll maker, rarely acting on your own, always listening to his demands, boundaries and needs - putting him first because he mattered more to you than you mattered to yourself, a fool, really - discarding yourself in the pretense of love.
âIâm sorry, doll, Iâm so sorry.â, he grasps your cheeks, the tenderness with which he embraces you, the soft look in his eyes, for a second you wonder how you couldâve ever doubted him.
âItâs okayâ, you lean into his touch, why do you always crave him so much?
He gently kisses your forehead: âI promise, Iâll do better, yes?â, you close your eyes and nod - a silent agreement, his cologne consumes you and youâre ever so soft for him, your problems seeming almost irrelevant, overdramatic even.
Satoru grabs your face and leans down to kiss you, a smile on his face. You smile back and sigh in content, his breath lightly tickling your nose. The kiss deepens as he wraps his arms around your waist tightly and you reach up to wrap yours around his neck, the need to be as close to him as possible growing with each kiss shared between you. His hand starts to roam around your body, when it reaches the curve of your ass, he smirks lightly and squeezes it. A gasp leaves your mouth and you have to break the kiss, questioning his intentions but too light-headed and caught in the taste of him to actually judge him properly.
âWhat?â, he smiles at you and leans down to whisper in your ear, âDidnât you want this?â, he continues as he bites your ear lightly.
Your face flushes and your brain short-circuits at the possibility of whatâs next.
Satisfied with your bright red face, he continues, âAlready blushing for me? Could you even handle what I want to do to you?â
âIâm sure I can hold myself against you, get off your high horse.â, you scoff at him - you werenât sure, at all, your brain after all stops working whenever heâs in armâs reach but he didnât need to know that, you had at least a little bit of pride left.
He hums knowingly: âProve it.â
âOh, I will.â, you scoff and before you can say anything else he grabs you a little roughly by your throat and kisses you, sending butterflies right down to your lower stomach.
Your fingertips trace around his chest slowly going lower and lower as you continue to make out, you felt like you were on cloud nine, Gojo Satoru is overwhelming you. The kisses turn sloppier, heavier, his hand squeezed your throat lightly and you gasp, drunk on him, feeling the wet spot in your panties you pull him closer by his belt, unable to control yourself any longer.
Satoru steps forward, not letting go of your throat and your lips and you stumble backwards, not expecting the sudden movement, until you reach the edge of your bed and he lets go of you and stares down at your flushed face and despite being fully clothed you felt very naked under his almost primal gaze.
âSit down.â he commanded, and you sat down, how could you not when he looked at you like he was about to eat the best meal of his life and it made you giddy, sending shivers right down your spine - youâd willingly let him do anything he wants to you.
He took off his shirt and your eyes widened, you had forgotten despite his seemingly lanky appearance he had muscles underneath. Hungrily you lean forward and your fingers reach for his belt, the need to touch him growing rapidly, he leans forward as your fingers start to undo his belt and he kisses you pushing you down further into the mattress, his arms caging you in, the size difference between you guys making you feel like a small rabbit in a lionâs den.
âYouâre so beautiful, y/n.â, he whispers into your lips.
You reach forward to kiss him but he draws back a little and you almost whine at him in frustration like a little girl.
âDesperate, arenât we?â, he tskâed and smiled, his lips trailing down the corner of your lips, to your jaw and finally landing on your neck.
He continues to leave kisses all around your neck while his hands trace all over your body until they finally land on the back of your thighs and spread them so he could place himself between them. His crotch met yours and you hissed at the sensation, your insides turning to jelly, too flustered to say anything else you grab his hair and tug at it lightly, especially when his lips reached a soft spot on your neck you couldnât help the moan escaping your lips and dug your fingers even further into his hair, he was igniting a fire inside of you and you werenât sure if you could stop this time. Satoru smirked at your soft spot and started to lick at your soft spot then continued to suck and bite at it, your eyes widened like a deer in headlights and you bit your lips, preventing yourself from moaning again.
When he was finally satisfied with what he had done, he reached for the hem of your dress, his cold fingers grazed your skin and he took it off and took in the sight of you.
âMy pretty baby.â, he smiled at you, you looked away in embarrassment, âAww, donât be like this, look at me, sugar.â, he reached for your face and forced you to look at him, âThis is only the beginning after all.â
It didnât seem like he was actually waiting for a response from you because before you knew it, he was back down at your collarbone, his teeth slightly grazing against your skin, sending another shot right down to your core and your eyes closed in ecstasy, you felt so good right now. The only thing in your mind were his lips and wherever they could land next. His sloppy kisses start to trail down to your chest, his large hands following in and cupping them around the bra, before he continues he gestured for you to take it off, you immediately listened and threw it across the room, not caring where it would land.
He gently grabbed your left breast with his left hand, his right hand meeting the curve of your ass and giving it a light squeeze as well as he leaned forward to kiss you, you moan into his lips, your mind only screaming at him to touch you, a chant that has grown and grown, you donât think you could ever have enough of this, of him.
His hand roamed around from your ass to your thighs until it reached the hem of your panties, he stopped kissing you and looked down at you.
âYou okay with this, love?â
You nodded eagerly in response, not trusting your voice to speak normally.
âWords, love.â, he smiled at you and your neediness, he knew you were almost begging for him to touch you but he wanted to hear it from your pretty little lips.
âYes.â, you huff, impatiently waiting for his fingers to meet your most sensitive area.
He hums: âYes, what?â
You were going to bite his head off: âPlease.. touch me, âToru.â, you mumble, suddenly embarrassed at just how needy you were right now.
A small chuckle leaves him: âGood girl.â, and doesn't wait any further, finally giving you what you need, he touches you between your legs, your wetness already having soaked your panties and he hums in approval. âAll for me, huh.â, he grinned while you gasped at his touch, your pussy pushed against him in response, craving the friction, the release, anything really.
He lightly rubbed your clit, watching for your reaction, those doe eyes of yours looking at him covered in pure lust, he didnât wait any longer and took off your panties, taking in the sight of your wetness.
The cold breeze hit you and you instinctively tried to close your legs.
âNuh-uh, donât even think about it.â, he growled and his hands wrapped tightly around your thighs preventing them from closing them, not waiting any longer he dove in and started to eat you out.
At the first touch of his wet tongue against your clit you let out a big a gasp, your head fell back and chest rose in surprise, your senses were on the edge, so consumed by him and you closed your eyes in pleasure, your fingers clenched into the sheets and you wrapped your legs around his head, not caring anymore about any shame whatsoever only seeking the pleasure he gave you right now.
His tongue sloppily devoured you, his left arm pressed down on your lower stomach preventing you from moving and youâre left at his mercy when he inserted a finger inside of you, you groaned at the foreign but pleasing feeling.
When he started to move his long finger curled up lightly inside of you and your eyes rolled back almost immediately, feeling so full with just one finger, you had to wonder, just how would you be able to take his dick.
âMore. Toru, please.â, you mustered up to say in your drunken haze, âIâm so close.â, you moaned at the tension building up in your core, ready to explode and he chuckled against your clit, making you almost cum undone.
He lifted his head up lightly, you could see his lips glistening from the wetness in your folds and you almost groaned at the sight, turning you on even more.
âDonât cum, until I say so.â, he looked at you sternly, âIâm nowhere near done with you.â
You rolled your eyes at his controlling behavior, not being able to handle not cuming and groaned, âI canât control it.â
He flicked your clit lightly and you gasp, flinching back a little at the slight cinch of pain, âCum, if you can handle the consequences.â
You groaned, wondering what you got yourself into, you bit your lips and prayed for mercy, heâd wreck you and you canât say youâd be completely against it, the idea of punishment exciting you even more.
âAre we clear?â, he asked, checking if youâd actually be okay with that.
You nod in response: âNow touch me.â, you whined, your pussy felt too empty right now.
He nodded, âgood.â, and dove right back in, this time adding a second finger, curling them up while simultaneously sucking at your clit like a starved man, you were a moaning mess at the sensations, his long fingers filling you up so much in a way your fingers could never.
You were close to cumming, not caring about his earlier warning you didnât even try to hold back but Satoru sensed it and took out his fingers before you could actually cum, you whine at him, feeling deprived and considered hitting him in annoyance, especially when you saw the glimpse of amusement in his eyes, he treated you like a cat playing with a mouse, nothing but a mere toy.
âSatoru.â, you moan, âplease, I wanna cum.â
âYou can do it, darling.â, he smiled at you and kissed you, his lips covered in your fluids they tasted slightly salty but not unpleasant, his hard and clothed dick rubbed against your vagina, âsee how hard you made me? Now be a darling and donât disappoint me, hmm.â, he hums.
You groaned into his lips, the sight of his hard dick made you feel so good, you felt like youâd be able to do anything for him.
âMhm.â, you hum, so drunk on pleasure you didnât want to speak proper sentences.
âGood.â, he smiled proudly, his hand went back down and he started to finger you again while he kept kissing you, his pace started to fasten with each second passing and unable to handle it you grip his back, your nails clawing into him the fast pace almost making you see stars.
He started to nibble around your neck, leaving bute marks and hickeys everywhere and when he finally reached another sensitive spot on your collarbone biting down on it, you couldnât stop yourself anymore, your eyes rolled back, you felt dizzy and light headed, âIâm cumming.â, you manage to gasp out, your toes curled and your breath grew heavy forgetting everything around you, Satoru kept fingering you during your high taking in the sight of the mess you had become.
When you finally rode off your high, at least an ounce of sense coming back to you, Satoru groaned at you: âYouâre so hot, when you cum, baby, you did so good.â, he praised you and took his fingers out of your pussy and licked his index finger, you flushed at the sight, âyou taste even better.â, he hummed and pulled his middle finger in front your mouth, âOpen up, baby.â, he demanded, you flushed even more in embarrassment but were still too light headed to protest so you obey him and open your mouth. âNow suck, love.â, and you wrapped your mouth around his finger, tasting yourself on it, sucking on it, while looking up at him, as if it were his dick you were sucking off right now you licked it all clean off your cum.
When it was all clean you let go of his finger, sat up and looked at him, âI also want to make you feel good.â, you reached for the hook of his pants.
âAre you sure, love?â, he asks.
You nod, âMhm, wanna suck you off.â, you smile and look at him innocently.
His eyes darkened and he smirked: âWell I wonât stop you in that case.â, he stood up and you crawled towards the edge of the bed, feeling excited again, at the idea of sucking him off, you unzip his pants and help him take them off, the sheer size of his dick peeping through his boxer and you could see a drip of precum, you gulped - how would you be able to take him fully?
âNervous?â, he chuckled at you in amusement.
âNo.â, you huffed, âI was just surprised.â, you hide away your inner doubt, youâd do what you can to please him.
âMhm.â, he hummed and you got off the bed and kneel down in front of him.
You hands reached for his dick inside of his boxers your fingers traced down his length and you heard him suck in a deep breath, your hands stroke up to his tip, teasing him and you could feel, that it took every ounce of self-restraint inside Satoru not to just jump you and take you - this made you feel powerful, confident.
With the new surge of confidence you massaged his dick lightly through his boxers and you looked up at Satoru, teasing him, your tongue glided up his dick through the boxers leaving a big wet trail on them and Satoru hissed and grabbed you by your hair, âCome on, love, take them off.â
In obeyance you nodded and took them off his length slapping into your face and you gulp - he really was big, you wouldnât be able to fit in his entire length.
Hesitating was pointless really, so you convince yourself to be a big girl and return the pleasure he had given you, taking his cock you wrap your lips around his tip and swirled your tongue around it, sucking it lightly like a lollipop, due to his precum he tasted a little salty and you didnât want to let him go without letting him cum inside your mouth tonight.
âFuck, y/n.â, Satoru grunted, holding back from pushing his length immediately right down your throat and fucking the daylights out of your mouth, he grabbed your hair tighter in a weak attempt to hold onto his sanity.
âHmm.â, you hummed against his tip, you could see the goosebumps appear on his skin at the sensation.
âYouâre driving me crazy.â, he hissed as you finally went in deeper now sucking him off even more, you barely had a third of him in your mouth and you already were full.
Bopping your head on his dick you slowly take more and more of him, enjoying that Satoru is letting you be in control for now and you planned to tease him just as much as he teased you.
âSucking me off so well, youâre such a good girl, darling.â, Satoru praised you, going straight into your core and you let go off his dick.
A little breathless you said: âJust for you.â, and looked up at him innocently, this would definitely get him going even more.
He smiled in approval: âSuch a darling.â, the grasp on your hair tightened while he forced you to keep looking at him, he pressed his cock against your lips again and you opened up like a good little slut.
Now he was in control again, starting out slowly he forced his dick deeper and deeper down your throat until your gag reflex kicked in and he pulled out, fastening the pace, you let him fuck your mouth, grabbing his thighs for some steadiness.
You felt so used but it felt so right at the same time, right now you werenât more than just a hole to him but the grunts and moans leaving his mouth felt like little praises towards you.
Saliva was starting to run down your mouth and he kept hitting your gag reflex so much tears started to come out.
âYouâre so pretty when you cry, baby.â, the sight of you on your knees, crying while taking him without a single complaint was enough to edge him on, he was reaching his high point, making him fuck your mouth even rougher and faster.
You kept gagging on his length, the sheer speed of him not letting you form any coherent thoughts, the only thing your mind could focus on was the way his balls slapped against your face and the iron grip he had on you.
âFuck, baby.â, he groans thrusting and thrusting inside of you, his eyes closed he threw back his head, âHiyori, Iâm gonna cum.â
Itâs as if cold water was thrown against your entire body and you just woke up from a terrible nightmare, the realization of what was going on through his head hitting you hard, like a wrecking ball - destroying any resemblance of happiness, only leaving behind the debris of bitterness, sadness and anger. Anger at him, at yourself, for being so stupid and letting yourself be used as a mere rebound you tried to push him off - to no avail - he was in too much of a bliss hidden behind a fantasy you werenât a part of to pay attention to you.
He finally came.
And you shattered, the salty taste of his cum down your throat scarring you deeper than any blade, any bomb could ever do
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Iâve been told to make this caption from one of my photos (yes this is me in the photo). I have no control over any of this, Iâve been told what tags to use and how long the post is to be pinned to the top of my page. đĽ
The post is up for three months (until June 8) and I am scared about how long Iâll get!!
P-p-please be nice. I d-d-donât want my life ruined!! đđđ
Update. If this post hits 100 REBLOGS I have to get a larger plug and dildo.
Update 2. You are all mean (specially @count-alta with your 20-odd reblogs)đ¤đđ I now have to get a larger plug and dildo. If it gets to 300 REBLOGS then I have to make a Discord server to show that I am in fact wearing the cage and plug đđđđ this is getting both out of control and expensive
Update 3. It hasnât even been a week. đ˘đ˘ Iâve been instructed to add note milestones. Iâve only been given a couple for now but more will be added if any of you suggest something my dominant likes.
Update 4. Iâm back from a brief hiatus from Tumblr while I settled into a new job, and I discovered that this post really took off. I now have to make discord (coming soon) and Iâve been given a new Reblog MILESTONE. If this post reaches 500 Reblogs I will have to start HRT. If it hits 1000 Reblogs then I have to find a man to fuck me on camera đđđđ. Please be nice.
Update 5: whelp itâs done. My Discord server is live
1500 notes: I have to keep myself hairless from the nose down.
1700 notes: Make an Amazon Wishlist and add 100 toys and clothes for anyone to buy. Anyone who buys them will get a free show with what they bought
1800 notes: my hair must be grown out
2000 notes: I have to resume my BambiSleeps regimen
2500 notes: Practice deepthroating the current sized dildo twice a week
2750 notes: I now have listen to Bambi sleeps every morning, afternoon and night on my days off
3000 notes: Sit on a 7-inch dildo 2 times a week for 30 min
3250 notes: I have to start using she/her pronouns
3500 notes: I have start wearing a bra everyday
3750 notes: Use a large plug now
4000 notes: I have to start an OF (ManyVids and webcamming as well once I find a better living arrangement)
4250: I have to film myself suck cock
4500 notes: i can only ever cum from anal
5000 notes: I can only wear androgynous clothing. Nothing overtly masculine
5100 notes: Sit on an 8-inch dildo 3 times a week for 30 min
5400 notes: Listen to Bambisleep hypno every time I do anal
6000 notes: edge with a Hitachi magic wand for 30 once a week
6500 notes: start using a ball gag whenever I do anal
7100 notes: Once a week I have to film myself anal training and share it to the discord channel
8000 notes: Sit on a 9-inch dildo 4 times a week for 30 min
8500 notes: I must listen to ALL hypno that is sent to me
9000 notes: The Hitachi edging session becomes twice a week
12300 notes: Clicker train myself to get horny to the thought of cock
13200 notes: Use an XL plug now
13500 notes: Only use 10-inch toys from now on sit on it 6 times a week for 30 min, once a week use a 12+ inch toy
15000 notes: I have to get either bottom surgery or an orchiectomy
20000 notes: I have to be spit roasted
25000 notes: I have to be the center of a Blow Bang
32500 notes: I have to be the center of a Gangbang đłđłđł
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deadpool!
âŚ.as your boyfriend.
description: deadpool as your boyfriend!
pairing: deadpool x you!
contains: 18+, mentions of sex!
|an: just saw deadpool & wolverine.. couldnât help myself.
- awful with emotions but always finds a way to make up for things whether through humor or sex.
- speaking of humor youâre never not laughing with him, or bickering, or fucking
- youâre the only person he can actually feel vulnerable and comfortable with, he cherishes that and he loves you so much for that.
- youâre his person, he would genuinely kill for you if it meant he would lose someone so important in his life.
- if someone makes you sad, mad or uncomfortable oooâŚnot his babygirl.
- he usually doesnât keep people or friends in his loop often, they could find him annoying or over the top but not you.
- you love absolutely everything about him, his outlandish humor, his extroverted personality, his big olâ mouth. you think itâs so hot.
- so hot when heâs mean to you so hot when heâs soft with you
- you literally bicker like two teenage girls all the time and he always somehow clocks your tea itâs ridiculous but you also find it impressive that he always has something to say that you cannot come back fromđ
- god you need to pray that no man ever even has the thought of coming on to you⌠heâll experience some banter with your boyfriend before itâs lights out.
- not only are you his but heâs yours! heâs super loyal and if he canât get someone to back off , you sure will!
- youâre always having fun with him date nights are some of the best times of your life, he always finds a way to entertain you no matter what youâre doing.
- always gotta hand somewhere, your ass, a singular cheek, a titty, somewhere. how could you expect him not to! youâre all his.
- you literally have him wrapped around your finger, heâd do absolutely anything for you.
- also always bullying you he is so straightforwardđ
âhon that has got to be the ugliest shirt iâve ever seen on youâ
âwade-â
âi know you got better in that closet that i snoop through and try on all your clothes when you arenât home now go!â
- heâs so tall so if youâre short oh wowâŚyouâre never catching a break
âsoooo howâs the weather down there.â wade said, placing his elbow on the crown of your head.
âprickâŚâ
âŚ
âyeah thatâs enough of that dirty mouth!â your boyfriend had announced before bending down and wrapping an arm around your behind, throwing you over his shoulder and positioning his palm on your ass.
âgod, wade put me down!â youâd laughed playfully hitting his back.
âdonât make me have to spank you!â he said, lighting pinching your ass.
- do not get an animal bc it will quickly become his center of attention and he will defend it over you.
âwade, weâre having my mom over please put it in the roomâ
âughâŚsheâs so mean isnât she sugar?â heâd said stroking your pet, followed by a âyes she is yes she is!â as the animal licked his face.
sigh.
- good lord we got a cuddle monster on our hands!
- absolutely adores any type of affection and practically begs you for it 24/7. he loves being little spoon specifically. also loves it when u scratch or message his back, bc that also gets him going..
- speaking of, you got this guy rock solid 24/7
âhungry for seconds?â he joked, hugging you from behind and pressing his hardened cock against your ass.
âwe literally jus-â youâd started just to be interrupted mid sentence.
âso! cmon baby throw a dog a bone.â he muttered, hand already gripping your inner thigh.
youâd sighed, god you canât resist him.
- it doesnât matter what youâre doing he finds anything you do hot i stg
- a M-U-N-C-H! for life, literally came in his pants from eating you out once! he loves making you feel good.
- a goofball during sex he cannot do shit seriouslyđ he be talking you and your pussy thru it!
- again, if youâre petite god help you bc he is large.
- babe, you better match his freak because yall doing anything.
- trying a new thing every night multiple times bc that sex is never vanilla and that dick is never tired! at some point heâs just making positions upđ
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CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT INMATE TOJI AND CUTE LITTLE Y/N WHOS SO NAIVE TO BIG BAD TOJI
CW: Slight smut (mentions of his ppđ¤)
âââ
thinking about Prison toji who you met when your college has you do a little project in your criminal psychology class. The project was make a penpal get to know them ask why they are in prision, what their lives before was like, do they regret what they did etc. basic questions of course all you had to do was get the most information out of the penpal about their personal lives as you could.
Prison Toji who only signed up for the program because it was part of his latest court order saying he âneeded more understandingâ so a penpal would give him a friend while they stay safeđ he ofc hated the idea and thought it was the dumbest shit ever. until he got his first letter, from you (duh).
Prison toji who got mail for the first time and it was a little white envelope with a cute little sticker sealing it. He deadpanned *is my penpal an idiot these letters are for a prison not a daycare* he silently judges examining every detail as he opened the letter. i read the letter taking in every little personal detail you shared with him, your cute little name, how you loved your cat, how youâre new to the city only just moving for school, of course the boring questions for him as well. But at the very end of the letter he noticed an extra little note.
Ps. i left a few photos of myself along with some of my cat! i think itâs only fair since i got to see your photo on the website
Prison toji who grabs the envelope he previously had thrown to the side and pulls out 3 polaroids. One of you and probably your cat youâre dragging it into the photo with a big grin on your face. the second is a photo of your face a soft smile on your lips meant for whoever took the photo but Toji couldnât help but wonder if that little smile was for him. Until he pulls out the third photo itâs a full view of you, youâre out in the city dressed all out, and Toji couldnât help but know you chose that photo just for him.
Prison Toji who canât wait to finally get some alone time so he can truly appreciate your pretty photos. And immediately goes to write you back answering all your cute little questions. Telling you where he lived before, how he ended up there, telling you what he did for work before (Surprise he sold drugsđ), telling you what he does to occupy his time here (he works out he just wanted an excuse to tell you how strong he is), and he asks you some questions.
Prison Toji who has been relentlessly flirting with since you started writing to him, asking if you had a boyfriend, how your school was going, why you moved to the city, how a cute lil thing like you is still single. You had been writing each other for a few weeks now which is a lot less than you think when you know how long mail takes. But your letters to each other are long. answering every little thing each other asks, learning about one another more and more. You had really connected so you finally ask him the big question he read the words as clear as day.
~Do you think i could come pay you a visit? ~
Prison Toji who had to immediately write back answering the most important question first.
~ And doll, you can come visit me anytime id love to finally meet you and see your pretty face in person~
he wanted to be nonchalant.
Prison Toji who was sitting in bed looking at your photos when he was called
âZenin, youâve got a visitor. away from the door.â
Prison Toji silently followed standing on the other side of the cell while the guard came in to handcuff him and bring him to the visiting area. Once he was in the room his cuffs connecting him to the table he waited. until he heard the door open again. He felt his cock twitch in his pants as he saw the guard guide you in. You were wide eyed taking in the new environment until they landed on him.
Prison Toji was large, you knew he was tall and muscular thanks to his letters and photo but nothing could have prepared you for the real deal. Eyes widening even more when you fully take him in. seated At the grey metal table his hands on the table as the guard had told him to. his hair poking at his eyes which were staring drinking you in. his lip in a smirk helping you notice the scar on it which you couldnât really see from the grainy prison photos. His shirt stretched against his muscles showing off a few tattoos hidden along his skin. the view making you squeeze your thighs together to release some of the pressure building.
Prison Toji who took in as much of you as he could as he watched you shuffle into your seat across from him, enjoying how you squirmed slightly within his gaze, his smirk growing into an almost full smile.
âhey doll itâs good to finally meet you.â
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sincerely yours. (12)
âł gojou satoru/reader
when a twist of fate led their marriage to the path of a quintessential tragic romance, two past lovers go through another series of experiences on love, heartbreak, identity, illness, and trauma along the road to a happily ever after.Â
genre. heavy angst, amnesia, modern au, 18+Â
tags/warnings. depression, mentions of cheating, trauma, implied suicide attempt, toxic relationships, illnesses
notes. 11k wc. finally. i wrote this with only one eye open so please don't mind the inconsistencies, i'm trying my best to tie any loose ends before we reach the ending. if the writing feels rushed, itâs bcos iâm just ready to wrap up this series đ
series masterlist -> episode thirteen
You thought everything that had happened last night was just a dream.Â
Because you had gotten used to the constant disappointments and vicissitudes of your life, sharing such domestic bliss with the person you loved had started to feel far-fetched for you. It had become an unachievable fantasy, a colorful delusion created by your mind to conceal the actual darkness of pain that surrounded it.Â
But as you opened your eyes that morning, the familiar warmth of a sleeping Satoruâs embrace was the reality you never saw coming. The steady rise and fall of his chest, the comfort of his arms around you, it all felt surrealâlike a fragile dream teetering on the edge of shattering. You wondered if it would be okay to stay here for now. To forget about the rest of the damn world and remain in his arms, staring at his beautiful saintly face, listening to his slow and steady heartbeat.
When Satoru stirred from his sleep, you knew your daydream was over. But he was pulling you dangerously close with arms wrapped around your frame and his lips pressed against your forehead. He was only half-awake, it seemed. His long white lashes reminded you of Sachiroâs as you watched him mumble incoherent words from his sleep, something along the lines of, âIâm sorryâ and âAkemiâ.Â
That was your cue to pull yourself away from him. With guilt now coursing through your body, you sat up from bed and covered your naked body with the duvet. Akemi. You had completely abandoned the thought of Akemi last night, and now you were here in bed with âsupposedlyâ her man. As much as your heart was in bliss from last nightâs events, the dark and cold reality was that you slept with a man who wasnât yours. It was a principle you told yourself you would never cross, but everything concerning Satoru Gojou seemed to be bringing you to that.Â
âSatoru, hey.â Your voice almost came out as a plea as you shook his arm, your guilt eating at you with every minute that passed. âWake up.âÂ
His eyelashes fluttered as he struggled to open his eyes, blinded by the sunlight that gleamed through the window as he stretched his arms and looked at you. âY/N?â he softly whispered, a hand tenderly placed on your back as he scooted closer. âWhatâs wrong?âÂ
Slight disbelief blanketed your gaze. âYou think this isnât wrong?âÂ
Satoru let out a sigh of exasperation, pulling his head back, and covering his eyes with a hand as if last nightâs events played through his mind scene to scene. He was obviously caught in a mindwreck thinking about the girl he had just cheated on. âIt shouldnât be,â he mumbled, âBut it feels like it.â
âSo you do regret it,â you laughed at your own words, internally in pain.Â
âI didnât say that.â He finally pulled himself back up, sitting as he pulled you towards him. âY/N, if we really thought last night was wrong, we would have stopped after the first time.â He shook his head at the irony. âLook, itâs on me, alright? I put you in this situation.âÂ
âAnd I allowed it,â you argued, âI allowed it, Satoru. It makes me feel dirty. I feel like, like Iâm wrecking someone elseâs home. Itâs not me.âÂ
Satoru held his breath, a look of hesitation dawning on his face as he realized that this wasnât just a dream of his. It was pure and raw reality that he had made a mistake that he could never undo. While thinking it through, he rubbed his eyes and sat up, leaning against the headboard as he assessed the situation. Then, he looked at you, his expression softening as he spoke, âNo, not your fault. Itâs just complicated,â he insisted, âYou didnât do anything wrong. Iâm the one who owes âKemi an apology.âÂ
Each time you heard her nickname from him was a punch to your gut. And each silent cuss that left his lips was an arrow to your heart. So you put it on yourself to accept his reaction. âItâs okay. You can be honest and say last night was a mistake.â
âNo, no, no. I didnât say that,â he replied quickly, reaching out to take your hand.Â
But you already stood up from the bed, clutching the duvet around your body like a shield against the encroaching chill. Your throat felt tight, and tears threatened to spill, but you fought to keep them at bay. Satoruâs gaze followed you with an expression of helplessness, as if he was struggling to bridge the gap between his rights and wrongs.
As you turned to face him, a knot of frustration and heartache tangled within you. âSo, what now?â you asked, trying your hardest to keep your composure. âHow are we gonna fix this, Satoru? How?â
Before he could answer, the door to the cabin suddenly burst open, and Akemi stood in the doorway with her eyes wide with shock and fury. The confrontation followed as soon as she caught you in a compromising position with Satoru, and the words she uttered next were ones you least expected from her.Â
âYouâre a hypocrite! Youâve become the person you despised the most when you were married.âÂ
âYouâre no better than Sera! And thatâs why youâre miserable, and youâll forever be miserable! If this is your way of getting back at me..âÂ
âThen jokes on you, because Satoru will never be faithful to you. Heâll keep cheating on you, just like he did now with me! You two belong in that cycle!â
You felt like an outsider in your own heartbreak, the confrontation intensifying as you tried to process the bitter truth in silence. All you could do was stand there and cry. Even Satoruâs attempts to placate Akemi were futile as her anger only seemed to grow. The more her eyes danced back and forth between you and her lover, the more she wanted to destroy everything in her path.
Satoruâs face was indiscernible from where you stood. âAkemi, please, just listenââ
Akemi, however, was already turning on her heel and storming back into her cabin while eliciting loud, muffled sobs. Your chest tightened with sorrow and shame. Complete, utter shame of doing this to another woman. How could you even correct a situation like this? How could you pick yourself back up after you just trampled on another womanâs feelings because of your actions?
Satoru, like you, hesitated on his next move, his eyes meeting yours with a look of anguish. âI need to talk to her, Y/N. Iâll be back.â
Without waiting for your response, he already bolted after her, leaving you alone in a quiet, pathetic state. The door slammed behind him, the sound reverberating through the cabin like thunder in a heavy storm.
You didnât know what to do, didnât know how to face everyone, didnât have the guts to even talk to Shoko and Suguru who now both have to deal with such scandals. You were too ashamed of yourself, as if your femininity had been stripped off its rights after you slept with the man you swore you would never get back with.Â
âI didnât mean it,â you could only silently whisper your laments, pacing around your cabin while swallowing the weakness that tried to escape. âI hate this.âÂ
The minutes dragged on, and each second stretched into an eternity as you waited for Satoruâs return. For now, you sat down heavily on the edge of the bed, wondering what excuse he was telling Akemi, and what actions he would do to try and calm her down. Did he kiss her, perhaps? Did he cup her face and tell her that you were nothing but a mistake? What was taking him so long? Or were they doing things to try and erase the same deeds you two did last night?Â
The cacophony of voices and commotion from outside the cabin grew louder, and your curiosity led you to open your door, meeting the eyes of one of the hotel staff who sent you a look full of judgment.Â
âWhereâsâŚâ you hesitated if she was the right person to ask, âWhereâs Satoru? Would you know?âÂ
âOh, maâam. He already left the hotel half an hour ago⌠with Miss Akemi.âÂ
Her answer hit you hard like a truck on a highway. And your heart dropped as you realized who became The Fool in these deck of cards. Satoru had not only run off after Akemi, but had also left you behind without a word.Â
The room felt colder now, the once-intimate sanctuary you shared with your ex-husband now a prison of your own grief. Even the familiar warmth of the bed seemed like a distant memory as you approached it, your body trembling as you thought of how you were treated like a dirty rag, thrown away after being used over and over again.Â
With a soft, choked sob, you collapsed onto the bed, the duvet still a tangled mess from earlier. And your emotions, so tightly restrained, finally broke free. You pulled the blanket around you as if it could shield you from the crushing pain. The betrayal, the sense of being discarded for anotherâit all converged into a torrent of anguish. All you could do was cling to the duvet as if it were the only anchor in a stormy sea.Â
ââ
Returning home didnât make the situation any better.Â
Although you tried to tell yourself that you shouldnât be waiting on Satoru to contact you, you still found yourself checking your phone multiple times a day. Each second that passed without hearing from him was another stab to your heart. But it shouldnât feel like that. It shouldnât, not when Satoru clearly made his choice of choosing yet another woman over you.Â
Of course, you knew what you did was wrong. In everyoneâs eyes, sleeping with someone elseâs man was unforgivable. There was no excuse, no way to justify your actions. Even if some people might side with you, saying you owed no one loyalty, it didnât change how you felt about the whole situation. And that was because you remembered all too well the pain of being cheated on, and letting another woman endure the same heartbreak and betrayal was a weight on your conscience that you couldnât ignore.
Sighing, you turned to the left side of the bed and saw Sachiro sleeping peacefully, clutching his favorite starfish plushie in his tiny arms. The thought of losing your son was unbearable, especially when he was your only source of calm amid the chaos that surrounded you. Caring for him was your solace, and his innocent presence served as a band-aid for your wounded heart. The most heart-wrenching part of this was knowing you couldnât even repay him for the stability he brought you. Sachiro deserved a complete family to enrich his life, yet youâas his own biological motherâwere unable to give him that.Â
âSleep tight, Sachi.â You lightly stroked his white hair before planting a soft kiss on his cheek. âDonât let the bed bugs bite.â
The past few weeks had been a blur of emotions, work, and parentingâwith each day blending into the next like a tornado of dull colors. You still hadnât heard from Satoru, but the days of waiting and checking your phone for any notification from him did gradually stop. The only thing that didnât stop replaying in your head like a broken record was the cabin incident, the very night that drew all these overthinking in your mind and in your heart.Â
Returning to work did provide some distraction, but it didnât take away the sting. It also didnât help that your staff noticed the change in your demeanor, and how distracted you often were during your meetings and warehouse visits. Even Nobara was worried about how absentminded you had become, but you brushed off all their concerns with a forced smile. After all, staying at home would do you worse than being at work.Â
Now, you were back in your office, and the soft knock on the door cut you off from your trance. It was Yuki peeking through the small opening on your door, her usual professional demeanor softened by a concerned expression. âHey, Y/N. Do you have a minute?â she asked, stepping inside and closing the door behind her with a quiet click.Â
You nodded, trying to muster a smile. âSure, Yuki. Whatâs up?â
âI wanted to check in on you,â she began, taking a seat opposite your desk, âIf you need to extend your vacation, please, by all means, go ahead. Itâs off-season, anyway. Iâll take care of everything here while youâre focusing on yourself.â
That wasnât really a good idea. And you shouldnât be slacking off work when this very fashion house you establish used to be your passion, not your job. Yet here you were, losing all the inspiration to even run a business. âI donât know if I have the energy for anything else right now.â
âWell, if youâre too worried about leaving work,â Yuki continued, her tone shifting to a more business-like note, âthe progress weâve made with Hearte is looking really promising. The new collection is getting great feedback, and our upcoming showcase is shaping up well. Weâre on track for a strong quarter.â
âAll because of you, Yuki.â A spark of gratitude appeared on your face. âThanks for the update. Itâs good to know things are moving in the right direction.â
She then stood up and gave you a reassuring smile. âIâm here if you need anything, Y/N. But seriously, take some time for yourself. You deserve it.â
On that same evening, you came home to your fatherâs mansion, and the first thing that greeted you when you entered the foyer was Gen sitting by the living room. And needless to say, her expression was a mix of concern and frustration as if she had been waiting for you to return. You werenât really in the mood to have some back-and-forths with her, but you also didnât like how she dropped her phone on the table and crossed her arms, her eyes narrowing at you like she was a mother who could scold you like a child.
âIâm not even gonna say anything at this point, but did you really do it with him?â Genâs voice was low, but the disappointment was palpable. You could feel it from a few meters away.Â
âWhat are you talking about?â you bit back, your already-terrible mood swings shifting into an unhealthy direction.Â
Gen responded by pointing at her phone, gesturing for you to take a look at whateverâs on it. Reluctantly, you grabbed the device, and as you were scrolling through the screen, you stumbled upon a blind item circulating on social media. The words were vague but pointed, hinting at a scandalous encounter between two ex-spouses, both of whom were well-known figures. Great. Your heart stopped as you realized that the article was very much about you and Gojou.Â
The online comments were brutal, not like you werenât used to anonymous harassment anyway, but these ones were full of speculating and judging without knowing the full story. Everyone also seemed to be siding with âMs. Aâ instead of you as though the person behind the article was clearly trying to paint you as the villain. It was written for the purpose of destroying your reputation rather than any regular exposĂŠ, and whoever wrote it was definitely someone who disliked you.Â
Your shoulders slumped as you scrolled through hate comment after hate comment, a seemingly endless vitriol for someone they didnât even know, and avoided your sisterâs gaze knowing full well that seeing her expression would only make you feel worse.Â
âIs it true?â your sister asked like there was even an ounce of chance that it was simply a rumor. Unfortunately, it was anything but.Â
Sliding her phone back on the coffee table, you drew in a deep breath. âI canât undo it, Gen. It happened.âÂ
âSo, you did sleep with him? Am I hearing this right?â Gen sighed, rubbing her temples. âDo you have any idea what this could do to you? To Sachiro? People are ruthless, and now this blind item is all over the place and theyâre targeting you like a punching bag!â
Your mouth felt heavy, as if it was weighed down by an invisible burden, making it difficult to form words or speak. And before you could think of a response, Ian became your temporary savior as he walked in with a calm but serious mien. âIâve seen the post,â he said, holding up his phone. âItâs clearly defamatory, and we can take legal action. Iâll handle it.â
Even though Ian was a man of remarkable phlegm, you remained abashed, knowing that everyoneâs feasting at the juicy rumor that you slept with your ex-husband. Yet, the only thing you could do was to put on a front. To save face. To act like someone youâre not. âThank you, Ian. Iâd appreciate that.â
Anticipating another lecture from Gen about Satoru, you began retreating to your room with your footsteps bouncing desperately on the grand staircase. This conversation was done. You just werenât there to hear it anymore. However, as you climbed the stairs with a vacant mind, you could still hear your sister calling out to you.
âY/N!â she called, her voice now tinged with concern. âIâm not going to give you a hard time. We can sort this issue out. Maturely.â
âIâm good.â Sorry, Gen. It was the anxious-avoidant side of you speaking. You didnât want to discuss such a sensitive situation to anyone, even with your sister, because you werenât ready to face all the negativity it would put you through. You were already dealing with enough, and going through yet another emotional turmoil might actually put you to your deathbed at this point.Â
So, for now, isolating yourself from the world was the best choice.Â
And as soon as you entered your room, you saw Sachiroâs nanny tucking him into bed. All your worries and self-destructive thoughts vanished in an instant the moment you looked at your son. It was like the heavens gave you your personal angel, a cute little cherub who brought nothing but light and happiness to your life. He was your sunshine, your shooting star, your bundle of joy. Nothing in this world could erase the pessimist in you than little Sachiro.Â
âI got it from here.â You thanked the nanny and asked her to close the door before quickly joining your son in bed, wrapping him in a warm, comforting hugâmore for your own comfort than his.
âMama?â he asked, his voice unusually raspy, and his chest rising and falling heavily. âI mwiss you, mama!â
You pressed your lips onto his forehead. âI miss you too, my baby. How was daycare today?â
He seemed to struggle to speak too, but Sachiro still did his best to recount his day while he was trying to catch air in between his sentences. âTeacher ask Sachi to go home, mama. Sachi is tired.â
âBaby, are you okay? Are you sick?â Now, your motherly instincts kicked in immediately. You could tell something was wrong, so you reached for a thermometer from the bedside drawer to check his temperature, and listened to his breathing at the same time. âWhat happened to Sachi? Do you want Mommy to take you to the hospital?â
Sachiro shook his head and gave you a sleepy smile. âNo, mama. Sachi is just sweepy.â
When the thermometer beeped, you were relieved to see that his temperature was normal. âAre you having trouble breathing, my sweetheart?â You looked into his droopy eyes and gently placed your hand on his chest.Â
Once again, Sachiro shook his head. Maybe you were just overthinking. He often ran around the house or played in the bathtub before bed, which could explain why he seemed out of breath. It wasnât the first time it happened.Â
âOkay, Sachi. Go to sleep now. Close your eyes, baby.â
âNight night, mama.â
For now, you turned off the night lamp, and headed to the bathroom in silent and careful steps. It was quiet enough indeed, but in your head was an awful noise you couldnât escape. And stepping into the shower only increased the warfare in your mind, as it immediately brought images of Satoru and Akemi back in the cabin, the harsh comments from the article, and the lack of contact from your ex-husband which all overwhelmed you at once. By now, he would have already seen that article. Nanami or Miwa might have already alerted him about it. But the fact that he said nothing, the fact that he let the public scrutinize you, destroy you with such vile, hurtful words behind their screens brought you a kind of pain that you wouldnât wish upon anyone else.Â
Because if it was Akemi in that position, he would have defended her in a heartbeat.Â
So in your silence, under the cascading water of the shower, you let the tears flowâits warmth distinguishable compared to the cold droplets falling on you. If only you had successfully drowned yourself that night at the lake. If only Satoru didnât pull you back in, none of this would have happened.Â
That moment was deeply poignant to you, and you saw him in a new light you thought you would never see again because of the darkness of your past. Yet, with the events that followed your special moment, memories eventually turned into spite. Your sweet exchange twisted into something bitter. Looking back at that time when he kissed you at the lake now made you feel nauseous and hollow inside, with bile forming on your throat and threatening to be retched.Â
The most gut-wrenching part about this was the fact that there wasnât anyone left who could rescue you from this abyss of heartache anymore.Â
ââ
There had been a sense of detachment in your emotions in the following days that passed, almost as though they belonged to a stranger inhabiting your body. Toji, the only person who comforted you at times like these, was no longer by your side to fulfill the warmth you once desperately sought, and now you were alone to face this cruel, mind-numbing battle all by yourself. It was you against the world. You against the entire populace inhabiting this living hell. And with that many enemies against one, how could you win?Â
It was quite funny, actually, that your humor took a surprising turn when you thought of how Sera must have felt when it was revealed to the public that she was Satoruâs mistress. The irony didnât even stop at your thoughts alone, it manifested itself outside Hearteâs headquarters, wearing a pink puffer jacket and a white prairie skirt.Â
âSera?â you blurted out her name in wonder, nonplussed as you got out of the car to approach her.
âHey, Y/N.â She offered a casual smile while carrying an air of sophistication around her. That wasnât the only thing that changed about Sera. Her hair was also shorter than the last you saw her, her face now sporting a more natural makeup, and her outfit a more modest yet classy choice. It was no longer the Sera who tried hard to fit in amongst the upper echelon of society, but a Sera who seemed to be satisfied at her current standing in life.Â
What an awkward encounter. Was her presence your hypocritical reminder for sleeping with Satoru behind Akemiâs back?Â
âWhat are you doing here?â you asked.Â
And she answered with, âI read about what happened. You know, the thing on the internet.â She took a moment to pause, probably trying to choose the right words to say to her previous adversary. Because in a way, you two werenât exactly friends. And you were no longer rivals either. Satoru was the only common denominator here, and Sera proved her exact sentiments about him by saying, âI just wanted to let you know that I understand your side. Itâs a tough situation.â
You looked at her, searching for any hint of insincerity, but found none. âYou were once on my spot,â you pointed out and gauged whether or not she would take the bait. For all you know, she could be putting on an act. âIâm assuming youâre here to rub it in my face how much of a hypocrite I am.âÂ
âNo, thatâs not it.â Sera was vehemently denying any malice on her intentions, and was instead trying to show you the sympathy of a woman who was once caught in the same predicament. âLook, I know itâs weird that Iâm here out of all people. But the truth is, I just had to let you know that someoneâs on your side. Iâve met the girl, okay? That⌠whoever she is. I donât remember her name, and I hate having to pit two women against each other, but Iâm telling you itâs about time you cut Satoru off your life. Completely. She doesnât look like someone whoâd easily let go. Youâre just gonna suffer, Y/N.âÂ
Perhaps three years was too far back in your life and that tables could turn in a direction that you didnât expect, as you could recall fragments of memories from when your only dilemma was dealing with Satoru and Sera in your marriage. She used to be besotted with your ex-husband back then. But now, it wasnât until you heard the way she spoke about him that you realized she must be harboring a grudge deeper than you had imagined. After all, he did ruin her life in ways you couldnât imagine. And her advice, though unsolicited, made sense. Because you could understand where she was going with it. You could see the true intentions clearly conveyed by her face.
The only problem here was that you didnât have it in your heart to agree with her. You were too much of an empathic person to be taking sides, even if the supposed villain in this painting was the ex-husband who, time and time again, hurt you. Your heart stubbornly cared for Satoru deep down, and your wifely instinct of defending him no matter how poorly he acted had always been there. No one could hate Satoru more than you did, that was true, but you also werenât very accepting of hearing others describe him as this ruthless, cheating bastard.Â
That was the reason why talking to Gen had eventually exhausted you. Because no one knew the real Satoru Gojou behind his facade of an irresponsible and reckless husband.Â
âNow that youâre hereâŚâ The idea to redirect the conversation to another topic struck you, unwilling to engage in a conversation that pushed Satoru in a bad light. âWould you be interested in being a model for our upcoming campaign? Weâre launching a new collection, and I think youâd be perfect.â
Seraâs eyes were an amalgam of confusion and surprise. âUh, I mean⌠Iâd love to, but why so sudden?âÂ
âYou have the face for it.â You shrugged, but still sent a smile her way. âAre you working right now? If not, this could open doors for you to be discovered by modeling agencies. Iâm closely tied with them since I work in the fashion industry, so I can do a few calls if you want.âÂ
âHold on, Iâmââ Sera touched her head, laughing as if she were dreaming this conversation. âY/N, youâre doing too much here. I mean, Iâd obviously love that, but wouldnât it be awkward? People know me as your ex-husbandâs mistress, and if they recognize me in Hearte ads, Iâm sure as hell those fuck ass netizens wonât stop talking about it.â
She had a point, a very good point, but then again, your suggestion was only brought up because you had to change the topic. âWell, itâs just an offer to consider in the future.âÂ
âAnd I appreciate you always extending a hand to help me even if I did you wrong in the past,â she said, feelings of shame lacing her voice. âI havenât forgotten about what you did for my brother, thatâs why Iâm here. Iâm not your enemy anymore, Y/N.â
Just then, the roaring engine of a classic red Ferrari pulled up to the curb, interrupting the unexpected conversation you were having with your ex-husbandâs former mistress. The window rolled down to reveal a pink-haired man whom you recognized as Ryomen Sukuna, an up and coming tech mogul, that Toji had mentioned about many times before. His eyes were only on one woman alone, and it wasnât you. âReady to go, babe?â
Honestly, good for Sera. No wonder her aura had become different. They seemed to be in a stable committed relationship, something that you could only ever dream about. If karma was truly real, this was the perfect example for it.Â
In the back seat, you spotted a younger boy who looked exactly like Sukuna and, surprisingly, Megumi, the son of your ex-fiancĂŠ. Really? How many more people were you going to âcoincidentallyâ run into today?Â
âHello, miss!â the other boy called out cheerfully, while Megumi offered a polite nod. You replied with a wave, feeling a small sense of normalcy in their innocent presence.
âI gotta get going, Y/N,â excused Sera, gesturing a civil goodbye.Â
But as she moved to get into the car, your phone buzzed in your pocket. A single glance at the screen made your heart drop. It was a call from the hospital.
âHello?â you answered almost immediately, pressing the phone on your ears with a tight push.
âMs. Y/N, this is the hospital. Your son, Sachiro Gojou, is in the ICU. We need you to come as soon as possible.â
Your stomach contracted into a tight ball as you stood rigid with terror. Then and there, the world seemed to tilt on its axis. âWh-What do you mean heâs in the hospital?!â you managed to shout, swept by horripilation from the sudden news. âWhat happened to my son?! Whatâsâ!âÂ
Seraâs concerned gaze met yours as you desperately yelled into the phone, hyperventilating. Your trembling hand was threatening to drop the phone. âY/N, is everything okay?â
âMy son⌠I⌠heâŚ,â you stammered, your voice shaky with fear and urgency. Your muscles locked in a momentary paralysis, eyes wide with astonishment, and surprise rendering you immobile. The thought of Sachiro in a critical state was about to make you faint, with the last bits of images you saw that afternoon were of Sera and her boyfriend rushing to catch you from completely falling to the ground.Â
ââ
Megumi didnât know how to deliver the bad news.Â
He came home after Yuujiâs brother rushed you to the hospital, shocked by everything that happened in a span of a single day. His mind was aching from all the thinking he was doing; praying that little Sachiro will be fine, hoping that you would stay strong throughout, and lastly, wondering how he would break it to his dad that something terrible had happened.Â
His father wasnât exactly the greatest man to tread this Earth, especially not after the drunken words he had âmistakenlyâ uttered to you that night in Miami that resulted in your separation. Yes, Megumi knew every word and detail. His father told him everything just as a sober man would. Did you really think that the Toji Zenâin you knew would sputter that utter nonsense to you? That you had an empty soul. That he couldnât be with someone like you. That you would forever be a placeholder to Megumiâs mother. Bullshit. None of those were true. His father told him that the reason he had to say those words, as piercing and trenchant as they may be, was because it was the only way he could free you from being caged in a relationship your heart didnât genuinely want.Â
It was Tojiâs last resort to hurt you with his words, hoping that you would wake up from your false fantasy and finally have a reason to leave a relationship with a man that wasnât Satoru Gojou. If Megumiâs father wasnât at the top of the list of Forbesâ richest men in Japan, he would have felt a great deal of inferiority complex over a younger man like Gojou. Not because of his looks and his riches, but because he had you. No matter what Satoru did, no matter how many times he hurt you, he was and would always be that man you wanted to be with.Â
Sighing, Megumiâs first task upon coming home was to check on his fatherâs room, only to find the dark room void of its owner. When he made his way down the grand staircase, he met an ill-spirited Naoya who was ranting to Mai about Sera flaunting Sukuna in front of his face. Megumiâs sigh was then followed by another. The drama in this house was relentless. He felt like he was exhaling endlessly, like a malfunctioning appliance.Â
âWhereâs dad?â asked Megumi, directing her question to a more rational Maki.Â
The tall, green-haired girl gave him a knowing shrug. âYou already know,â she said, âDrowning himself in alcohol down at the bar.âÂ
As always.Â
Megumi jogged around the estate to eventually find his father at one of the wet bars near his home office. He was there, seated on a stool, his head drooping low with a glass of premium scotch in hand. How many glasses heâd had, Megumi could only hope the numbers weren't that high. But upon approaching his father, his presence was barely acknowledged as he sat on the stool next to him, suggesting that the grown man might be more inebriated than his son had expected.
âDad,â spoke the Zenâin heir, âDad, you good?âÂ
Toji lifted his head up, three sheets to the wind, as a smile crept up on his scarred lips. âSon.âÂ
âLet me take that.â Megumi grabbed a hold of the glass of scotch, sliding the strong liquor away from his father. âThereâs something I ought to tell you.âÂ
Toji stayed nonchalant, sitting upright and tapping his fingers on the counter. âWhatâs it about this time?â he asked. âIâve told you, I canât stop the elders from arranging your marriage unless youâre honest with me about someone you like. I know you have someone in mind, but youâre not saying who. Are you just shy?â
Megumi gave his father a look of exasperation. Heâs rambling, he thought, frustrated with his fatherâs inebriated chattering. âItâs not about that. Itâs about Y/N-san.â
The mention of your name was the only thing that made Toji's demeanor shift to one of genuine concern. âWhat happened?â
âSachiâs in a critical condition,â the younger Zenâin went straight to the point, âY/N-san went manic over it and fainted before we could get her to the hospital.â
Toji was quick to grab his coat and car keys, as if all the alcohol in his system had immediately evaporated. But before he could leave, Megumi caught his fatherâs arm and pulled him back.Â
âWhat?â said Toji, concern and urgency blanketing his gaze. âI need to be with her.âÂ
âDo you really need to?â Megumi countered. âDad, I know itâs not right for me to stop you in this crucial situation, but are you gonna do this every time sheâs in trouble? Do you plan to do this forever? Do you plan to keep drowning yourself in alcohol thinking about her? We care for her like family, thatâs true, but you and her arenât a thing anymore. Your responsibilities in taking care of her should stop, too. You, yourself, said itâd be best if she stopped being reliant on you. Now, do yourself a favor and stop trying to be this pathetic superhero.âÂ
The concern etching on Tojisâs face softened into a sense of realization, a sense of candidness that only someone as straightforward as his own son could evoke. Megumi had to, not because he didnât care for you anymore, but because he had to ensure he wouldnât lose his father over a relationship that had already ended. Toji was the only real family Megumi had left.Â
âStay, dad,â he pleaded, âPlease.â
Toji took a deep breath and released it in the same second. âOkay,â he softly said, ruffling his sonâs hair. âI wonât leave.âÂ
ââ
Why is it that you keep attracting things, places, and people that you disliked the most?Â
You hated hospitals, and you had spoken about it enough to make it clear how much you dreaded going to a place where your worst memories had taken root. Yet, the sterile environment seemed to beckon you, dragging you back with a new nightmare each time. It was beyond your worst fears that you would find yourself racing through the halls mere minutes after regaining consciousness, desperately trying to reach where your son was.
Please be okay. Please be okay.Â
Frantically, you scanned the corridors, searching for the ICU and hoping that what you had just heard was nothing more than a cruel illusion, that this was all just a nightmare. You werenât a deeply devout person, but you did send prayers to every saint you could think of, hoping that Sachiroâs current state wasnât in the median between life and death.Â
Because if you lost your son, then there was no point in living anymore. This life wouldnât be worth enduring.Â
âY/N!â
You werenât the first one to arrive outside the pediatric ICU, with Gen and your father already being there moments before you came. You were struggling to breathe by the time you reached them, feeling your heart race with a thunderous beat. âGen⌠Dad, what h-happened to him?â You couldnât stop the weakness in your voice. âTell me heâs fine, please. Please. My baby. If anything h-happens to him, Iâm g-gonna die, Gen! I c-canât h-have that!â
Gen quickly enveloped you in a tight embrace, trying to offer any form of comfort she could. âIâm so sorry, Y/N. Dad and I are just as shocked.â She held you closer, her voice trembling as she, too, was just as anxious as you. âSachi refused to eat and complained about having a hard time breathing. He was so pale and his lips were blue. We knew we had to rush him to the hospital immediately.â
âOh my God.â Your hand flew to your mouth, trying to stifle the uncontrollable cries that were escaping. The news of Sachiro developing cyanosis shattered your heart, and the crushing reality that you werenât there to take care of him tore you apart. âMy baby, no. No, no. H-Heââ
âY/N!âÂ
Out of breath and also visibly shaken was the father of your son, Satoru, who came running to your side the moment his eyes landed on you. Behind him was his mother, clutching a rosary in her hand as both of them were seemingly shell-shocked in the same magnitude as you and your family were. Everyone cared for Sachiroâs well-being, everyone prayed for his safety, and the thought of losing an angel like your son was a soul-crushing thought that sent you slipping into a chasm of suffering. Â
âWh-What happened to Sachi?â Satoru asked in desperation, his question raised to everyone in the vicinityâyou, your family, the nurses. But no one could give him a decent answer. âPlease, tell me my sonâs alright. Tell me.âÂ
You watched him walk in circles, raking his fingers through his hair as if he was seeking anything to hold onto. And you, feeling that magnet that pulled you closer to him, broke away from Genâs embrace to look at your sonâs father. âSatoruâŚâÂ
âY/N,â his voice cracked as he met your gaze, âOur son.â He stopped, ready to wrap you in a hugâa moment of solace you both desperately needed in this critical time. But just as he pulled you close in a fragile attempt to find comfort together, the door to the ICU swung open, abruptly ending the brief respite.
All of you immediately rushed over to the doctor, the sterile white walls and the distant hum of hospital machinery did nothing to calm the turmoil inside you.Â
âDoctor, howâs he?âÂ
âHowâs my grandson, doc?â
âDoc, my son, is he okay?âÂ
âIs he stable, doc?âÂ
âDoctor, howâs my son, please?â you asked, your body growing tense to the point of shaking.
The doctor took a deep breath, his expression serious amidst the fusillade of questions thrown at him. âWeâre currently running a series of tests on the patient. We suspect Sachiro may have congenital heart disease, specifically a ventricular septal defect with associated pulmonary hypertension.â
No, it canât be. Itâs not possible! The words hit you like a punch to the gut. You struggled to process the information, your vision blurring with tears and your heart drumming a rapid staccato inside. You didnât need to look at everyone to know that they all, for a moment, looked at you. âHeart disease? But⌠how? I didnât thinkââ
âCan you explain more, doc? Please.â Gojou was desperate, his bright blue eyes now dull and severely clouded with a brewing storm. It was as if he was keeping himself from crying.
The doctor continued gently, âVSD is a condition where thereâs a hole in the heartâs ventricular septum. It can lead to pulmonary hypertension, which means the blood pressure in the lungs is elevated. Itâs a serious condition, but weâre doing everything we can to assess the extent and provide the best treatment.â
âN-No, oh God. My baby.â You felt your knees go weak, and you sank down against the wall, with more tears cascading down your cheeks like waterfall. The weight of the diagnosis was crushing, but the hardest part was realizing that this was something you had unknowingly passed on to Sachiro. The heart disease was inherited from you and had now manifested in your beloved son.
Itâs my fault. Itâs my fault!Â
The doctor placed a reassuring hand on your shoulder. âWeâll keep you updated as soon as we have more information. Please, try to stay calm, Y/N. Itâs not best for your heart to panic right now. Sachiro is in good hands.â
You were unable to speak through the sobs that wracked your body. The hospital corridor felt endless, and you couldnât shake the feeling of guilt and helplessness that consumed you. You could feel all eyes on you, judging, harboring hatred, carrying deep-rooted resentment. You were torn apart by the knowledge that the very thing you had feared most was now a reality for your son.
âItâs⌠Itâs my fault,â you sobbed, covering your face with your quivering hands, âThis is all my fault. I gave it to Sachiro, I⌠Iâm a terrible mother!âÂ
Gen knelt beside you, her hands gripping your shoulders with a firm yet gentle touch. âY/N, stop it. This is not your fault. You didnât choose this for Sachiro.â
Your father, who had been pacing anxiously nearby, joined in. âYour sisterâs right. Youâre blaming yourself for something beyond your control. Weâre all here for you. Weâll figure this out.â
But amidst your familial exchange, Satoru stood nearby, frozen and listless. His silence only added to the overwhelming distress. Was he also blaming you for what Sachiro was going through right now? Was he also angry at you for putting his son into this critical situation?Â
Suddenly, a familiar voice cut through the commotionâvoice that was equally harsh and spiteful. It was Satoruâs mother, boring her fiery eyes into your skull as she opened her mouth. âThatâs right! Youâre self-aware, arenât you?â she spat and stood rigidly, arms crossed defensively over her chest. âThis is all your fault. Youâre such an irresponsible mother! You canât even take care of my grandson properly, and now youâve passed your disease onto him!â
You looked up in shock, seeing Satoruâs mother standing there with a disdainful expression. The sting of her words felt like a knife twisting in your heart, because they were true. They were painful, yes, but they were true. And all you could do was lower yourself until you were sitting on your haunches, trying to make yourself as small as possible.Â
âExcuse me?!â Gen stood up, her eyes blazing with anger that came from the deepest pits of hell. âYouâre unbelievable, Auntie. How dare you speak to my sister like that! You have no right to blame her for this. I hope to God it was you in the ICU right now instead of Sachiro!â
âYouâŚ!âÂ
Satoruâs mother raised a hand to slap Gen, but your father stepped forward, his face a mix of disbelief and indignation. âThis is despicable. How can you stand here and say such things to someone whoâs already suffering? Werenât you friends with my wife once?â
Satoru, who had been standing still, suddenly moved with a menacing calm. His face was hard as stone, and his eyes narrowed in anger. What was scarier was him approaching his mother with a threatening stance. âAre you really this pathetic, mother?â Satoru questioned with a cold, cutting tone. âDo you get off on making Y/N suffer? Do you think youâve gotten away with slapping her behind my back? You donât get to blame Y/N for anything. Any fucking thing!â
His motherâs eyes widened in shock, but she tried to defend herself at the ruthless stance her son was carrying. All of you were stunned at the realization of how Satoru resembled his cruel father at that moment. âB-But Satoru, my sonââ
âShut up!â Satoru cut her off, his voice harsh and unforgiving, before he threw his cold knuckles against the hard surface of the concrete wall. âI donât want to see your face ever again! Donât consider yourself my mother any longer, you witch. Youâve lost that privilege.â
This took a wild turn, and hearing the brutality of Satoruâs words was like a thunderclap in the tense atmosphere. His motherâs face turned pale, her mouth opening and closing in shock as she struggled to respond.
âGet out of here,â Satoru commanded, his voice uncaring towards her. âLeave, and donât ever come back. Youâre nobody to me now.â
With that, Satoruâs mother turned and fled, stumbling down the corridor as if she was the victim in this situation. However, the tension in the air began to dissipate as soon as she left, leaving you, Satoru, Gen, and your father in a heavy silence. Only your sniffles could be heard.Â
Even Gen, who was often hostile around your ex-husband, had remained quiet and composed after she watched him take such drastic measures to keep his mother away.
Everyone was silent. Pure, unbothered silence until Satoruâs phone began to buzz loudly, cutting through the stillness of the hallway. For a moment, he closed his eyes, then he fished his phone out of his pocket where you caught a glimpse of the caller ID.Â
Akemi.Â
ââ
The ICU only allowed short visits and one person at a time, so there was no need for everyone to stay the night. You were the parent, you were the one responsible for your sonâs situation, so you insisted it was best for your dad and Gen to go home and get some rest. You didnât mind watching over your son for the whole night, because coming home without him was the last thing you would do right now.
My precious angel.
Sachiro lay in the hospital bed, his small chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm. The doctors had managed to stabilize him for now, and the sight of his heart monitor showing a stable rhythm was a small comfort amidst the chaos.
Still, you sat by his bedside, mindful of your timed visit as your hands gently held his tiny ones, feeling the warmth of his small fingers. You glanced down at the medical report on your other hand, trying to make sense of the complex terms and figures.
The words blurred together as your tears fell silently onto the paper. âIâm sorry, baby.â He didnât deserve this. Heâs just a baby. âMommyâs very sorry.â
You tried to stay strong, putting on a brave face for your son, but inside, you were falling apart. It was impossible not to blame yourself over this, wishing you could do more than just be present around him. This was the comeuppance of your own actions after you focused on your own emotions for the past few weeks to the point of neglecting your sonâs wellbeing. If you had been more present in his life, if you had been more observant, you would have easily noticed the signs. Now, you allowed Satoru to find a flaw in your duty as a mother, and he could cite this very event as evidence to get full custody of him. That is, if he were to ever consider taking your son away from you.Â
But in the first place, he should be the last person to do that, because where exactly was he now?Â
Your thoughts kept drifting back to the earlier scene, where he excused to answer Akemiâs call, and later that night told you he had to leave and âcheck somethingâ urgently. He promised heâd be back before midnight, but where was he?Â
Resentment began to fester within you.
You had been very perceptive of Akemiâs feelings, apologetic in the way you supposedly betrayed her, but the fact that she was still scrambling for Satoruâs attention in the midst of your sonâs hospitalization was something you could never forgive her for.Â
And as for Sachiroâs father, how could he prioritize another woman when his own son was in such a critical state? The confusion of his actions was overwhelming. It felt like a cruel deja vu that, at a time when you needed him the most, he was choosing to be elsewhere. You could accept it if it was a choice between you and another woman, but between his son and her? His behavior was unacceptable, disgusting even, and it only served to deepen your grudge against him.
You clenched your fists, trying to push away the surge of anger that threatened to consume you after seeing that the disparity in his actions felt like both a betrayal and a slap to the face. Your poor son. You stared at Sachiroâs peaceful face and stroked his cheek. How could Satoru be so indifferent to his own flesh and blood?
The room was silent except for the soft beeping of the heart monitor and your quiet sobs. The situation was almost too much to bear, and your resentment towards Gojou grew heavier by the second. Each minute felt like a lifetime, and the emptiness left by his absence was a constant reminder that yet again he chose another woman over his own family.
Itâs okay. You took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. I wonât leave you, Sachi. For Sachiroâs sake, you needed to find the strength to carry on, to be the mother he needed in this moment of crisis and never again failing to be there for your only child.Â
At exactly 10:30 pm, the nurse came in and told you visiting hours were over. You complied.Â
At 11:00 pm, Ian paid you a quick visit and talked to the nurses, perhaps giving them reminders to look after you.Â
At 12:00 am, you were alone again. Seated at one of the benches outside the ICUâsleepless, starving, and nauseous.Â
At 2:00 am, you remained in your seat despite the sterile smell of antiseptic mingling with your own discomfort. The flickering fluorescent lights above did little to help you get some proper sleep. The cold air-conditioning alao made you shiver slightly, hugging your own body to try and give yourself some warmth.Â
At 4:00 am, you awakened from the noise of the movements beside you. Realizing you had fallen asleep, you looked up and saw Satoru taking a seat to your left. His coat was draped over his arm, and he offered it to you.
âAre you cold?â he asked, his voice softer than usual, but you could see the bags under his eyes suggesting the sleepless nights heâd had for the past few days. âYou can use my coat.â
You took the coat, but as you caught a whiff of it, a familiar scent of Akemiâs perfume lingered. Rose Prick by Tom Ford. It was a scent youâd come to recognize after your years of being her best friend, and it made your stomach turn slightly. Without any hesitation, you handed the coat back to him. âNo, thank you. Iâm fine,â you replied, avoiding his gaze. Looking into his eyes was the last thing you would do.Â
And you knew Satoru was sighing, but didnât press the issue. âThe nurse mentioned you havenât eaten today.â He pulled out a small bag of assorted fruits, placing it gently on the seat between you. You eyed the offerings, feeling a pang of hunger but also a strange aversion. âI bought some fruit. Is there anything you like?â
You took a deep breath and broke the silence with a hint of sarcasm. âYouâre really good at this, huh?â
âAt what?â was his immediate question, puzzled.
âHitting two birds with one stone.â
âY/NâŚâ
âStop trying to take care of me,â you interrupted, your tone sharper than intended. â I donât need it.â
âButââ
You swallowed the lump in your throat. âYou canât even be here for Sachi. You canât even choose your son. Heâs in a life and death situation and weâre still only receiving scraps of your attention.â It was the deep-seated grudge spilling out of you. âYouâre so good at abandoning people, huh? Even though thatâs what you hate the most. Youâre so good at disappearing without even a text or call to check on me and our son. After that night at the cabin, you justâŚâ you paused, realizing that you were opening too much of your heart to a man who didnât deserve it. âForget it. Just go home to Akemi. Live a happy life, build a family with her. Forget us. I donât care. Iâll take care of Sachiro myself. Iâve done it for three years!â
âY/N, Iâm not trying to hurt you. I justâŚâ Satoru fumbled for words, his somber blue eyes bearing the history of your shared heartbreak. It was as though the painful memories of your past were flooding his thoughts, seeking justification as to why he couldnât pick you again this time. âI had to be there for her. SheâsâŚâ
You turned away before he could see your expression, because your heart was splintering at the thought of Satoru Gojou shattering it once more. As he always did. There seemed to be no end to this relentless heartbreak, as if any hope of a happy ever after with the man you loved would only return a pain that was a hundred times worse. Perhaps, this was destinyâs way of telling you that you and him werenât meant to be. That any wishful thinking of being with Satoru again was only something that you could expect in another universe.
So, in your defense, you had to pull on a facade. A mask that you had to wear in the face of being the target of never-ending despair. âSatoru, I donât want to talk about it,â you said firmly, concealing the raw ache in your voice with a smile. âAnd I donât expect you to choose me every time. Itâs okay. Itâs happened before.â
âCanât you see Iâm hurting, too?â he asked, his voice breaking. Though you couldnât see his face, the tremor in his voice revealed his struggle to hold back tears.Â
You couldnât understand why he would be hurting with his decision. When faced with two crossroads, he always seemed to pick the path that led away from you. So instead of trying to comprehend his pain, you decided it was time to honor your own. For your sake. For Sachiroâs.Â
âLetâs just forget about that night,â you declared, wiping your eyes as you got up from your seat and prepared to walk away. âFrom this day forward, letâs pretend it never happened.â
ââ
Akemiâs apartment was dark when Satoru stepped inside.Â
And to be honest, the darkness was a relief. At least, she wouldnât be able to see the lassitude etched on his face, not just from juggling his time between his son and her, but from the constant ache of hurting the person he loved.
Miscommunication is a coupleâs greatest enemy, and the persistent disconnect between you two, coupled with the reluctance to clear things up, had worn Satoru down. He wanted to end thisâthe feeling of helplessness and the torment of seeing the woman he cared for caught in a labyrinth of despair.
The hospital visits to Sachiro alone had been a whirlwind of emotions and responsibilities, and this brief visit to Akemi felt like an unwelcome detour, but one he couldnât avoid. Satoru knew his heart wanted to stay in the hospital with you, to wait for any updates on his son, to hold your hand and care for you, yet here he was, dragging his feet across the carpeted floors to approach Akemi.Â
âHey.â She was sitting on the couch, looking frail but alert as if she had been desperately waiting on his arrival. She had recently started treatment for her stage 3 endometrial cancer, and Satoru could see the toll it was taking on her, physically and emotionally. He would be cruel to leave her hanging like this, to neglect her at her worst when she had been there by his side at his. Satoru had an unspoken accountability on her, because it wouldnât be fair for him to just abandon her after she poured all her heart and soul into helping Gojou get back onto his own feet. Â
âHey, âKemi,â he said, his tone soft but distant. âDid you take your meds today?â
Akemi looked up at him, her eyes tired and heavy. âI did. I took them just like the doctor said. Howâs Sachiro?â
Gojouâs expression tightened. âHeâs holding steady at the moment.â
A heavy silence settled between them before Akemi broke the tension. âIâm glad heâs stable,â she said, quietly. âAre you okay?â
He nodded once, his mind already drifting back to the hospital. âYeah. Listen, I need to head back soon. Nanami and Miwa will be alternating in looking after you from now on. Theyâll make sure youâre okay while Iâm dealing with Sachiro. I have to focus on my son.â
Akemiâs frail hand reached out to gently grip his arm, the other held her lower abdomen in pain. âSatoru, please donât go just yet. Canât you stay a little longer?â
Nowâs not the time to feel guilty. It was either her or Sachiro. Her or his son. Gojou decided to pull his arm away gently, his gaze distant. âSachiro needs me, Akemi. You know that.â
Akemiâs face fell, but she knew it would be ridiculous to argue over that. âNo, I understand. I get that. I want you to focus on Sachi, too. I just wishââ Before she could finish, her voice faltered, and she looked up at him with a hesitant gaze. âSatoru, do you regret that I took you back even if you cheated on me?â
The question caught him off guard, and Satoruâs blue eyes narrowed as he processed her words. He had been so focused on his responsibilities and the immediate crisis that he hadnât given much thought to their ârelationshipâ. All he knew was when he showed up at her doorstep back at the cabin, he was only going to try and end things with her. He was only going to clarify the longstanding feelings you and him poured out to each other that night, which was why he ended up sleeping with his ex-wife. But because Akemi suffered at the time, because her pelvic pain worsened to the point of an emergency, he had to hold back and just take care of her in the weeks that passed. He was caged in this situation like a prisoner who was found guilty for the crimes he had committed.
Just be honest, Satoru. Disregard everything else and just be honest. Satoru believed it was about time he stood his ground no matter the consequences. âYou canât take me back if weâre not together, âKemi,â he breathed out those words, reticent on hurting her with the truth. If she would lash out on him, throw a vase on his head, slam a book on his faceâhe wouldnât mind. He was ready to accept all the violence he deserved from being an asshole. âYou knew from the start that this, us, was only temporary. It was never supposed to be serious.âÂ
Her expressions turned doleful. âThen, in that case, did you at leastâŚâ Tears welled up in her eyes as she she paused, âDid you at least love me?â
âI just⌠I never saw it that way, Akemi.â Satoruâs honesty would destroy her, but he didnât want to keep on sending out false hopes. He had to be firm, and while he was grateful for everything she did for him, that doesnât mean he owed her his life and loyalty. In the first place, he warned her that he wasnât ready to be in a relationship. And God, he was far from ready to even settle down, yet Akemi constantly hinted at wanting to tie the knot with him. Again and again did she mention the thought of a wedding and a child and her own family.Â
Satoru wanted all those things too, but with another person in mind. He was only set on having those things with one woman.
Akemiâs face paled upon hearing his answer and the fact that he didnât even bother to explain himself. âI see. I guess I needed to hear that.â
Gojou looked at her with a mix of regret and sympathy. âIâm sorry. Iâm sorry for hurting you like this, I really do.â
âItâs fine. Donât worry about it.â
It definitely wasnât fine, but Satoru had to take her word for it as he got out from the couch and gave her a gentle pat on the head. âI have to go. Nanami will be here soon. Please make sure to follow the treatment plan and take care of yourself.â
Akemi nodded, though her gaze remained fixed on the floor, unable to meet his eyes. âAlright. Iâll see him when he gets here.â
As Gojou turned to leave, he felt a pang of guilt twisting deep in his gut but pushed it aside. He was a father first before anything else. Sachiro would always be his first and foremost priority amongst everything else.Â
ââ
After leaving Akemiâs place, Satoru was driving his car into the evening air beyond the speed limit. And his mind was racing together with him as he thought of you, your son, and the myriad of emotions he was struggling to manage. He couldnât wait to be home, not literally at his own place, but anywhere with you and his son was his definition of home.Â
It would be diabolical for him to run into your arms and yell, âIâm free! We can be together again!â No, that would be cruel and disgusting. He respected Akemi just as he respected you. It was himself that he couldnât respect, because he was the one responsible for the mess that he created. And adding Sachiroâs critical condition on top of the already festering wounds in your relationship? It truly was the manifestation of karma in his actions.Â
His footsteps bounced through the hospital corridors the moment he arrived, each impatient step was ready to see your face and tell you he would never leave you and Sachiro now. But as he neared the pediatric ICU, his eyes darted around, the sight of his ex-wife was nowhere to be found. And instinctively, his heart pounded in his chest, and a drum of panic seemed to warn him of a storm that was about to come. Something was off, and it scared him.Â
âNurse,â he called out, his voice edged with urgency as he approached their station. âWhereâs my wife? The boyâs mother?â
The nurse looked up, recognizing the infamous CEOâs face. âUh, Mr. Gojou, she was heading to the rooftop, I think.â
âWhat?!â he unintentionally yelled at her face, âWhy didnât you guys keep an eye on her?âÂ
âSir, calm down. Sheâs probably going to get some fresh air.â
A cold chill ran down his spine. You were definitely not there for that.Â
Without another word, he sprinted towards the stairs, taking them two at a time instead of waiting at an elevator together with a group of people. He had to get to you as soon and as fast as he could without another second to waste. Although the climb felt endless, his mind racing with fear and dread was the push he needed to finally reach you.Â
And upon bursting through the door to the rooftop, he was met with the soft whisper of the evening wind and the heart-stopping sight of you standing perilously close to the edge.
âY/N!â he called out, his voice breaking with desperation. âDonât do this. Please, step back.â
You stood motionless, eyes fixed on the distant horizon, the city lights blurring into a kaleidoscope of sorrow. âThe world hates me, Satoru,â you whispered, the mellow tone of your voice carried away by the wind. âIâm a burden to everyone, even my own child. I-I just⌠I want to end it all.â
âNo!â Satoruâs heart shattered at your words while he moved closer, his hands outstretched and careful not to startle or provoke you. He was dying to have you in his arms and keep you safe. âY/N, please. Come back. What about Sachi? What about me? We need you. Sachiro needs you. I need you.â
What exactly made you go here? How did thoughts of ending yourself suddenly come into fruition? Was there something you discovered that brought you to this ultimatum? Gojou was desperate, utterly desperate, to hear what was running through your mind so that he could at least ease the burden that you were carrying all by yourself. He was once in the position where he wanted to commit too, and he knew the temptation that came with permanently escaping the cruelty of the world in just a single action.Â
âY/N, please. Please, Iâm begging. Come to me,â he rattled on in a suffocating whisper, the pleading in his voice was heavy, âPlease. I love you. Only you.â Â
It was when you turned around that Gojouâs world collapsed, and the words you said after had shattered his entire universe.Â
They were still.Â
You.Â
And the wind.Â
âIâm pregnant,â you finally confessed, voice cracking as you looked at the faint tears that fell from Satoruâs eyes. âI donât wanna have this baby.âÂ
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lando smau where theyre lowkey but heâll find a way to slip small crumbs of her in every post somehow
ââË.â private not secret - ĘÉ´4 â
âż lando norris x reader
âż a few of the times lando norris managed to sneak his girlfriend into his posts and the time he won his first formula 1 race
áľáľáľĘ°áľĘłË˘ âżáľáľáľ ŕ¨ŕ§ my brain is fried so iâm sorry if this isnât what you wanted đ
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landonorris
liked by maxverstappen1 and 752,014 others
landonorris see you next time china đ¨đł
hearts4lando bro thought he could slip a flick of y/n and we wouldnât say anything
carlando everyone say thank you for the crumbs
⤡ danielricciardo Thank you king! đ¤´
alexandrasaintmleux Missing my girl đ bring her back to me
⤡ landonorris how about no đ
⤡ landonorris iâm coming baby - alexâs girl
⤡ alexandrasaintmleux Iâll be waiting đ
⤡ charles_leclerc So I guess Iâm stuck third wheeling my girlfriend and my girlfriendâs girlfriend when I come back
⤡ landonorris always đ - alexâs girl
landolovesyn i love y/n so much đĽš
georgerussell63 Y/n is my idol I wanna be like her when I grow up
⤡ landonorris your 5 years older then her??
⤡ georgerussell63 Well then I wanna be like her in my next life damn.
⤡ landonorris you are my hero george russell youâre such a icon - alexâs girl
⤡ charles_leclerc Oh weâre still doing this?
⤡ landonorris we never stopped?? 𤣠- alexâs girl
beloved.hamilton no itâs the fact y/n has her own account but always takes landoâs phone and replies on his account đđđ
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landonorris
liked by mcarlen and 3,227,986 others
landonorris WWE FUCKIJG DID IT. P1 đ
yn so proud of you đ
⤡ landonorris i couldnât have done without you and all you do for me baby â¤ď¸
oscarpiastri Well done man đđđ
georgerussell63 Congrats mate!!
lando_luvr4 him running to y/n before anyone else got me in tears đĽšđĽš
maxverstappen1 đĽłđĽłđĽł
carlossainz55 Well deserved â¤ď¸
mclaren We made it boys! đ§Ąđđ
chilipowder55 i took a nap and got woken up to be told LANDO WON HIS FIRST EVER F1 RACE???
maxfewtrell So proud brother đ§Ą
landowantsrizz ok but what does WWE have to do with this?
landolovesyn YOU DID IT LANDO IM CRYING HAPPY TEARS RN
all4lando i already know what him and y/n are doing tonight đ
lnfour LFGGGGGG
estiebestie everyone shut up iâm so happy right now
charles_leclerc Lando we can be world champion!
team_quadrant *SCREAMING*
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landonorris
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landonorris a night of celebration đĽł
charles_leclerc âalex wants to know the next time her and y/n can have a sleepoverâ
⤡ landonorris itâs like weâre just their side hoes or something đ
⤡ alexandrasaintmleux Or something? you are - alexâs girl
⤡ landonorris babe come back i miss you where did you two go
⤡ alexandrasaintmleux Youâll never find us
⤡ charles_leclerc They just took the bowl of pasta and ran đ
pierregasly the clam before the storm
maxfewtrell Come back soon I miss you đ
sharls_lerklerk y/n and alex stealing the pasta and hiding with each other đ
alex_albon it was amazing seeing lando going feral when y/n wouldnât come out of hiding đ
⤡ carlossainz55 Truly a sight for sore eyes
georgerussell63 I wish someone was as down bad for me as lando is for y/n
⤡ carmenmmundt Girl. Donât even.
danielricciardo Crazy crazy night đ
⤡ flowers444yn i need to know what happen now
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landonorris
liked by judebellingham and 1,082,439 others
landonorris feels good to be back đ¤
landolovesyn y/n appearance!! đĽ°
landonowins iâm only here for y/n tbh
⤡ lilymhe me 2
⤡ francisca.cgomes me 3
⤡ alexandrasaintmleux Me 4
⤡ carmenmmundt Me 5
⤡ lilyzneimer Me 6
⤡ landonorizz everyone loves y/n
carlando lando nowins & lando norizz are retired. lando norris has won in life.
carlito55sainz if you look very closely you can see me jumping off the balcony đđ
operationsainz55 this love is the typa love you find in movies & books
lewistearmeup the dark aesthetic then the light pictures of y/n đđĽšđĽ°đđđ
lovely_leclerc my heart canât take all this love and cuteness anymore stop
ynstan4lyfe awhh so cute iâm sleeping on the highway tonight đĽ°đĽ°
đŽ
áľáľáľĘ°áľĘłË˘ âżáľáľáľ ŕ¨ŕ§ i just took a nap and when i woke up i opened instagram AND THE FIRST POST I SAW WAS LANDOS?? i had to finish this and him winning was my motivation đ
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imgonnagetyouback [guilty as sin part four] | charles leclerc social media au
pairing: charles leclerc x fem sainz!reader
PR jail did a lot of damage, but unlike SOMEONE else, charles is ready for the apology tour
MASTERLIST | GUILTY AS SIN MASTERLIST | TIP JAR
note: the timeline is absolutely all over the place in this and for needs must pretend that the spanish and austrian races are swapped on the calendar!
yourusername
liked by maxverstappen1, oscarpiastri and 1,045,389 others
yourusername: i think your house is haunted, why are they always mad?
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user239: i have had it with little miss poet over here TELL ME IF MY PARENTS ARE DIVORCED OR NOT
user240: i hate that as this generation, them following each other on instagram is a key feature to whether they're still together or not
user241: my grandparents didn't have to go through this đ
maxverstappen1: spill it sis
user242: WHAT DO YOU KNOW MAX
maxverstappen1: ummm nothing, and if i did i only take cash bribes. this is baby max relating hard to the caption
user242: oh :(
yourusername: oh maxy .... at least we now have good ways to express our emotions!
user243: ma'am he tore lando's wheel off because he can't handle wheel to wheel racing
liked by landonorris
yourusername: it's called hard racing, maybe mclaren should watch some of senna's old races instead of doing their 100th tribute livery xx
landonorris: you know he said you would do this exact thing, you can't handle anyone linked to your brother doing well
yourusername: oh i was perfectly prepared for you to win every race after miami since it was clear that the mclaren is the fastest car on the grid EVEN THOUGH you've publicly sided with them when anyone with a moral backbone (and a hint of PR awareness) would've run for the hills
landonorris: i'd really worry about the fact that the one piece of relevance you had left is no where to be seen, you're not worth defending for him
yourusername: it's insane the way you all have the same pompous attitude about this (i know that's a big word, but maybe you guys could get a couple of quid together to buy a dictionary)
maxverstappen1: also don't try and pretend 1. that you're completely in the right about everything that happened in austria 2. that you weren't scrounging around me (when we were friends i guess) trying to get details on y/n and charles
user244: okay this is wild
user245: i really thought lando would see the light on this
user246: or he realised that he can't race wheel to wheel unless he has the power of carlando friendship so he's burning bridges
oscarpiastri: i miss leo
yourusername: we literally are down the street bozo
oscarpiastri: i am ON MY WAY
user247: she's in monaco ???
user248: has to be, oscar only has a rental place he stays in london for mclaren and y/n has only ever lived in madrid or monaco
user249: there is still hope everyone
charles_leclerc
liked by yourusername, maxverstappen1 and 2,309,677 others
tagged: yourusername
charles_leclerc: was i out of line? did i say something way too honest?
there are a couple things i need to get off of my chest.
first, a massive apology to my girlfriend. y/n is the love of my life and will be my wife sooner or later and i hate that as a 26-year-old grown man i haven't had the backbone to stand up to ferrari when it comes to her. she's incredibly strong and i hate that she's had to go through this without my public support. i can't take it back now, but if i could i never would've let them take my phone and take control of my social media. they have now been dealt with and no one will stop me declaring my love and support for her.
second, if i hadn't already ran out of patience before, the legal trouble that family have put their own blood through threw me over the edge. they will never, ever deserve that girl and if i have anything to do with it they will never talk to her ever again. i may have been silent online but money talks and we will have vindication soon.
third, a big thank you to max, oscar and ollie for their continued support of y/n. it means so much that the public still saw how loved she is when i couldn't.
four, i am awake and i am angry, these people will learn who they are fucking with. see you soon lecfosi, it'll all be worth it in the end.
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user254: WAR IS OVER
user255: my heart dropped when i got the post notification but this is the best news possible
user256: am i going to excuse a 26-year-old man for being a pussy? no. but i am going to celebrate him seeing the light and y/n having him back in her corner
yourusername: he was never out of my corner. true there was no public support, but he was there. i would rather have his support behind closed doors where it matters than plastered all over social media
maxverstappen1: you wouldn't believe the lengths these two were going, i became a messenger pigeon when they physically took his phone and the letters were so grossly cute
yourusername: that's literally mail tampering
maxverstappen1: and i'm a human not a pigeon, we can't all get what we want
charles_leclerc: i did i got y/n đđđ
maxverstappen1: ugh welcome back gross instagram comments
user257: so that's what max meant when someone referenced letters that's so cuteeeee
user258: the shout out to max and the extended leclerc family i know that's right
oscarpiastri: anything for my grid mum
olliebearman: actually charles can you get your phone taken away again cause the heist was VERY fun
yourusername: heist???????
charles_leclerc: don't answer that ollie
yourusername: answer it ollie, did you put yourself in harms way ???
charles_leclerc: it was hardly high-stakes
olliebearman: we only stole a phone from silvia's office
yourusername: ollie that's kind of slay but i'm going to need you to delete all of these incriminating comments i don't want you to get in trouble for charles
user259: i know this is just eating up carlos inside seeing how loved she is in his sport
user260: it really does seem that lando is the only one in his corner
sebastianvettel: i am proud of you charles, i know how much ferrari means to you, but never let them take you from those who matter
charles_leclerc: thank you seb, i couldn't have done it without you
yourusername: we love you seb
sebastianvettel: my impromptu not at all prompted trip to maranello definitely wasn't to give you a well-earned slap up the side of the head
user261: no carlos bitching it up in the comments... i've been dreaming of this
maxverstappen1
liked by danielricciardo, yourusername and 1,734,037 others
tagged: charles_leclerc & yourusername
maxverstappen1: back to being a third-wheel, balance is restored - the united front of hating is BACK BABY
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user263: i prayed for times like this
user264: i know they didn't break up but i'm so glad y/n and charles are back together they're too pretty not to be in our faces 24/7
yourusername: just paying you back for you and kelly let me crash on the sofa
maxverstappen1: that really wasn't the burden you thought it was, jimmy and sassy loved their interactive cat bed
yourusername: i miss them (don't tell leo)
charles_leclerc: HOW DARE YOU MUM :((((((((
yourusername: okay baby we're not going to do that ...
charles_leclerc: but :( his feelings are hurt
yourusername: i know lewis is cool and will be your new teammate, but i draw the line at pretending to be leo in the instagram comment section
roscoelovescoco: watch urs backs
yourusername: AHAHAHHAHAHA
maxverstappen1: this man is about to turn 40
lewishamilton: you people ever heard of having some whimsy in your life
yourusername: i got sued by my own family đ
lewishamilton: um yeah, sorry that happened to you
user265: y/n be ticking up the amount of drivers she's gone toe to toe with in instagram comments
charles_leclerc: you can finally eat my ice cream without trying to hide it
maxverstappen1: i think it's against my partnership contracts to publicly say that i like that ice cream
yourusername: don't worry baby we both ate three tubs and cried watching chick flicks while you were locked away in maranello
charles_leclerc: there's a reason a special edition strawberry flavour made its way to you
yourusername: i love you :(
carlossainz55: you might be "united" but you haven't won yet
charles_leclerc: do you ever shut the fuck up?
carlossainz55: oh someone finally found their voice
charles_leclerc: yeah i did which means you don't get to control the narrative anymore and i can call you a bitch
maxverstappen1: also if there was anyway we would lose, at least we are united, i can count how many friends you have left in this sport on one hand and two of them are your dad and your cousin
charles_leclerc: and watch out, clearly you guys aren't afraid to betray family, who knows it could be you next?
user266: i think charles is still being restrained but can we please at least get one day when he can fully go off his rocker
user267: i think we deserve it after all of it
yourusername
liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,764,094 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
yourusername: she's not only poet barbie but also lawyer barbie - THAT POETRY IS MINE BITCH, SUCK MY DICK AND RUN ME MY MONEY
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user268: i don't think i've ever been more happy for a stranger before in my life
user269: she deserves this so much i'm actually like over the moon
charles_leclerc: i'm so happy for you baby, i knew it would all be worth it in the end
yourusername: they can't stop my romantic ramblings now
charles_leclerc: i don't know if i want them to hear them all
yourusername: oh no some are for our ears only ;)
oscarpiastri: unfortunately it's NOT all just for your ears
olliebearman: for a millionaire i thought you'd at least buy a house with thick walls
maxverstappen1: you'll get used to it after a while
yourusername: THERE WAS CAUSE FOR CELEBRATION ARE YOU GUYS NOT HAPPY FOR ME ???
oscarpiastri: clearly not THAT happy
charles_leclerc: good. that would be entirely inappropriate
user270: finally some normal fucking couple stuff for y/n and charles
user271: their dynamic is so cute going from poetry to FUCKING
user272: i would be the exact same if i looked like either of them
fernandoalo_oficial: spoken like a real poet, i'm happy for you niĂąa
yourusername: thank you pops !! couldn't have done it without you <3
fernandoalo_oficial: dealing with charles having close to a nervous breakdown every weekend was a lot, but i'm glad you have each other
charles_leclerc: thank you nando :)))) (i didn't have a nervous breakdown)
fernandoalo_oficial: you stress ate seven punnets of grapes
charles_leclerc: FERRARI I SWEAR I DIDN'T
charles_leclerc: wait i'm still annoyed at you ignore that
user273: i think charles is the first case of stockholm syndrome to a sports team
yourusername: @carlossainz55 come on i wanna tussle stop being a pussy
carlossainz55: enjoy your victory lap while you can, it won't last for long
yourusername: suck my actual dick, you put me through this i won't let you run away from it
yourusername: massive tip because i'm feeling generous, maybe actually come to court because there's a lot that you could know ...
carlossainz55: why would i waste my time on you?
yourusername: all will reveal itself
user274: oh it's finally on the other foot .... i'm enjoying this
user275: i think y/n and charles are too
f1tea
liked by user276, user277 and 21,056 others
tagged: carlossainz55
f1tea: sources close to us say that there is serious worry in the sainz camp after the courts decided they were unlawful in their actions against y/n sainz. the financial standings of the sainz family were already somewhat dyer before they took the youngest sainz' income but it's said to be even worse now they've had to pay damages.
in terms of f1, several of the teams that were interested in sainz were put off by the way he and his family were treating his sister but have fully backed out now the financial struggles of the sainzs has become clear.
this comes after a number of sponsors have ended their partnerships with the spaniard. where do you think he'll end up?
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user278: at the job centre hopefully
user279: i think this is what the kids call poetic justice
user280: the way charles just picked up a new sponsor... we love to see it!
user281: all the sponsors flocking to charles is so fucking real
user282: life comes at you so fucking fast
user283: in the words of his hero: KARMA!
user284: especially since fernando congratulated y/n on her win in court đ
user285: bro can't even afford the tractor seat at williams i am HOWLING
user286: or at sauber, boy oh boy this is some great great content for a hater like me
user287: or HAAS and they fucking took nikita mazepin
user288: the next race can't come fast enough i wanna see how this guy spins it in the media
user289: for once in his life i can't see him spinning this is any way that makes him look good
user290: god i hope y/n is in the paddock as well
user291: oh gosh i need her diana revenge dress moment
user292: i don't care if that's your brother i need you to STUNT ON HIM
user293: other than y/n and charles, i know oscar is cheering at this news
user294: bro saw his grid parents get back together and his biggest opp be declared broke and jobless
user295: i really don't understand how y/n slutting round the paddock has been praised so much when her hopping from driver to driver has cost her brother his dream
user296: cope.
user297: also y/n has only ever been with charles DESPITE carlos and her father trying to pimp her out for favours
usr298: now we know this ^^ i don't understand why carlos was so annoyed that she was finally doing what they always wanted
user299: it was because it didn't serve him.
user300: he was probably happy y/n was with charles until he realised it was for you know an ACTUAL relationship rather than psychological teammate warfare
carlossainz55
liked by landonorris, marcmarquez93 and 104,889 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
carlossainz55: it was never 'true love' if all you ever wanted was to bag a trophy husband and never work again
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user302: posting a picture of charles' crash and tagging him is nasty business
user303: would've been iconic if i wasn't him
user304: also that caption just really isn't the read he thought it was
user305: i grew up watching posh spice and cheryl cole in the stands at england games like obvs people want to be with athletes
user306: also this guy pretending he doesn't have a revolving door of models who are just there to be wags
yourusername: yes? and.
yourusername: at least wag isn't my only job. you better hope that rebecca stays booked honey
carlossainz55: don't bring rebecca into this she has nothing to do with any of this
yourusername: awwww did you already cheat? that does track...
yourusername: also you've been slandering my boyfriend all over the internet and ON THIS POST so shut the fuck up i'll bring up who i want to bring up
carlossainz55: get the fighting words out, you might need them when charles questions why you just happened to fall into his lap
yourusername: you've stolen every last penny from me, sued me and tried to turn everyone i care about against me - and guess what? YOU'RE STILL STUPID
carlossainz55: i'm not stupid you're a gold digging slut and you WILL BE FOUND OUT
yourusername: i actually think i could play pinball with the one remaining brain cell in your head
user307: i know this is serious drama but YES SASSY Y/N IS UNLEASHED FROM HER LAWYER'S GRASPS
user308: someone TAP CHARLES IN
user309: please you're out of the ferrari jail NOW IS THE TIME
charles_leclerc: you think i'm going to be offended that the most beautiful girl in the world has always wanted to be with me?
yourusername: what if i told you i'm a mastermind?
charles_leclerc: i would say i'm impressed and FLATTERED
yourusername: and now you're mine :P
charles_leclerc: and i'm glad
charles_leclerc: and i am of the serious belief that even if you didn't seek me out, we would've found each other regardless
yourusername: you made me believe in soulmates
maxverstappen1: @carlossainz55 this post really didn't do what you thought it would lOL
oscarpiastri: bro is falling at every hurdle
carlossainz55: yeah, yeah fuck you two. i'll see you on the track
maxverstappen1: if you can get close enough :P
yourusername
liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,783,088 others
tagged: charles_leclerc & maxverstappen1
yourusername: siri play hoes mad
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user310: this girl is a bestselling poet and this is how she's captioning her instagram posts
user311: babe we're like months into a family war that has had whole ass court cases we don't need eloquent captions
oscarpiastri: where's that one tiktok audio
yourusername: that audio has gone platinum in our house, i think i've saved every edit with it and charles
charles_leclerc: they do slap every time
maxverstappen1: HOES MAD HOES MAD HOES MAD
yourusername: someone is enjoying this
maxverstappen1: i've been praying on these people's downfall since i was 17 i've got a fancy bottle of wine i've been waiting to open
yourusername: we've really been through the wars with these people
charles_leclerc: and ME
maxverstappen1: well here's to them being BROKE AS FUCK LOL
yourusername: cheers!
charles_leclerc: đĽ
user312: this has been some kind of crazy turn around
user313: considering we all thought they had broken up not long ago we have come SO far
charles_leclerc: i'd have the whole world mad at me if it kept you by my side
yourusername: i love you so much
user314: tbf i'd say a good 80% of people were mad at you when you were being ferrari's bitch
charles_leclerc: HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY I'M SORRY
sebastianvettel: if it's any consolation, he was very torn up about it
yourusername: i know what happened charles, don't worry. i know you're dedicated to your craft and have people you want to win for
charles_leclerc: but i'm also dedicated to you
yourusername: we're in it together, forever now
yourusername: although this does mean ferrari have to deal with me now
user314: ugh they're so precious
carlossainz55: i'll have the last laugh don't you worry. you may have won the battle but you have not won the war.
user315: does this guy ever Shut the FUCK UP
user316: i'm bored. can't you just let them be happy
carlossainz55: no.
fin.
note: I'M SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG but here she is, can't tell whether i love it or hate it - probably because i've been looking at it so long xx i guess p5 will be out hopefully some time soon and i hope my tagging works
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Young k will be out soon, how are you feeling?
feeling very normal about it (lie)
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omg jade i heard you asking for hotch reqs and i RAN to your inbox
what about hotch taking care of r after they have a lil baby?? i think if i saw that man hold a new baby id die!!!! he could hole their whole head in the palm of his hand đđđ
Every time you move, your hips and more intimate regions hurt like a hot poker. You probably wonât cry, but you require some tylenol and some sympathy to carry on. âHotch?â you ask.Â
Silence. You tip your head back over the armrest to find him. Even upside down, he looks handsome, sitting in the two seater with your little bundle of agony in his arms. Or, arm. The baby rests neatly in the curve of his forearm, his free hand dedicated to the babyâs small back.Â
âHotch?âÂ
âWho is she talking to?â Hotch asks your baby gently. You know what heâs doing immediately.Â
âYou get so hung up on the Hotch thing, if you didnât want to be called Hotch, you shouldnât have introduced yourself as Hotch.â Â
Youâve been calling him Hotch for years, you arenât going to suddenly kick the habit now.Â
âShe was my subordinate,â Hotch tells the baby. âShe couldnât have special treatment, even if she is the prettiest subordinate I ever had. It wouldnât have been fair.âÂ
âI wouldnât mind some more tylenol.âÂ
He raises his gaze. You twist into a painful but better suited position to watch him move the baby closer to his collar, his hand covering the entirety of the babyâs small head. Hotch said Jack was a little baby too, but youâd been terrified regardless, and no matter the size, it was too big for you to come out of the ordeal unscathed. Tylenol isnât so much wanted as required.Â
âIâll get it for you,â he promises.Â
âThank you, Aaron.âÂ
âOh, youâre welcome, honey.âÂ
He stands and shifts your tiny baby further into his chest, little snores pressed to his collar. âYou okay to take him? Iâll make you some lunch at the same time.â
âI canât eat.âÂ
âJust chips and a sandwich, honey. You can manage that.â Â
You open your arms, letting Hotch lower your baby down into your arms and the surrounding nest of blankets. âYou need to go see where Jack is,â you say.Â
âI know,â Hotch says, kissing your cheek quickly. âIâm gonna make his lunch too. Iâll be right back.âÂ
You cuddle your baby to your chest and lean back. Your baby Hotchner is, as previously stated, so tiny, but heâs a nice weight against you, and he sleeps like a champ. You thought easy babies were a myth until now. So far heâs done nothing but sleep and stare at you whenever you talk. You think itâs love, or the surprise of seeing the voices that talked to him nonstop while he was in your belly now out in the open. He does the same to Hotch whenever heâs awake.Â
You havenât named him yet. You asked Jack for help, but heâd recommended you name your new baby Mister Awesome, so youâre at a loss for now. It doesnât matter, though. Heâll have a name eventually. Until then, heâs the baby. And heâs very well loved.Â
You wish he hadnât hurt so badly to bring into the world, is all.Â
Somewhere deeper in the house, Jack tumbles down the stairs, to Hotch's audible horror. âAre you alright? What are you doing, buddy?âÂ
âIâm being quick!âÂ
âPlease be careful!â Thereâs the sound of a kiss. âYou sure youâre okay? Yeah? Gonna go and keep Y/N company?âÂ
âYeah, dad.âÂ
âOkay, thank you. Iâm gonna make your lunch now, any requests?âÂ
âPeanut butter. And chips. And pretzels. And orange slices? Andââ
âHow about I bring you lots of everything, bud?âÂ
âYes. Please. Hug?âÂ
They must hug, though you canât see or hear it, as Jack walks into the living room with wildly tousled hair and a smile. He climbs over the back of the couch even though he shouldnât, dropping onto your feet, a tangle of arms and legs. âHi, Y/N.âÂ
âHi baby. You hungry?âÂ
âDadâs gonna make me a sandwich.âÂ
You reach over to collect his hand in yours, squeezing his fingers gently. Youâd thought for sure that having a baby in the house would upset him, if only because his usual routine was disrupted âheâd had to make room for you first, and now suddenly thereâs a new baby taking all the attention? itâs not what only kids usually wantâ but Jackâs an easy kid too. He squeezes your hand back, shimmying up the couch to lean on your leg. It aches, every touch to your lower half a reminder of the pain further inward, but heâs not rough. He climbs further onto your leg and rests his cheek on your shoulder.Â
âIs this a cuddle?â you murmur.Â
âPretty please.âÂ
âNo please required.â You frown to yourself, trying to juggle the baby into the opposite arm so you can wrap the one closest to Jack around his shoulders. You manage it poorly. âDad makes this look so easy.âÂ
âHe has longer arms,â Jack says with a shrug. His nose jabs the skin just above your chest. âDonât worry about it.âÂ
âI wonât. Thank you, babe.âÂ
Jack touches the babyâs back. âHeâs sleeping?âÂ
âYeah. Must be weird getting to sleep all the time and then suddenly being born. At least heâs not crying.âÂ
You and Jack lay with each other for a while, watching the baby snore as you whisper about what Hotch is making for lunch. You wish heâd brought you the tylenol before he started, but heâs got a lot going on. Youâre glad heâs the one making lunch (though you canât be expected to right now, considering). The idea of having to stand there and butter a sub roll sounds like a low level of torture.Â
âDonât let me fall asleep holding the baby,â you tell Jack, your eyes drifting closed as Jack snuggles closer to your face.
âI can go get dad.âÂ
âIâm here,â Hotch says swiftly. You drag your face to the side to see him in the doorway, two dinner trays balanced with ease in his hands despite their obvious weight and full glasses on either side. âDonât fall asleep, Iâm coming. Sorry about the wait.âÂ
Hotch puts your trays on the coffee table and scoops the baby from your chest, leaving behind an awfully warm patch of skin.Â
âTylenols on the tray,â he says, smiling at you lovingly. âYou okay?âÂ
âFine. Jackâs gonna feed me.âÂ
To his credit, your lovely stepson offers to really feed you, but youâre not so tired now thereâs food in front of you. Your stomach groans in want.Â
Hotch stands looking down at you, baby somehow even smaller looking in his arms. âNeed anything else?âÂ
You hold half of your sandwich up to him. âEat that.âÂ
âIâm fine. My hands are full.âÂ
âIâm not asking, Aaron. Take it.â You force the sandwich on him. âWe both know you only need one hand.âÂ
Heâs cautious not to rain crumbs down on the baby. You make no such fuss, bread and lettuce falling down into your lap as you eat. Jack canât stop giggling, âYouâre not sâposed to eat like that!â
âSorry!â you say, âIâm just so hungry!âÂ
âItâs okay,â he says. âDad will vacuum you.âÂ
Hotchâs mouth is full to bursting, but his nod is vehement. He swallows hard. âIâll mop you, too.â Â
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â âyour colorful secrets.â || jang wonyoung x reader fic.
â weeks after the event which you call "the weirdest thing that's ever happened all year", wonyoung approaches you about your 'strange' behavior towards her in the most 'wonyoung' way possible...
word count: 10.6k
dynamic: dom!mean girl!jang wonyoung x sub!nerd!reader.
content warnings: smut, fingering, clit play, nipple play, masturbation (for like, a minute lmao), overstimulation, mommy kink, degradation.
requested? : kind of!
a/n: well, we finally made it ya'll! đđđ i feel like i'm gonna say this about every fic i write here from now on but PHEWWW THIS QUITE LITERALLY TOOK FOREVER?? but i was more than happy to flesh this little universe out more and revisit our favorite mean girl and her awkward nerd <33 just like you guys, "magic words" is one of my favorite things that i have written so even though this kinda took me wayyy too long to finish, I WAS SO HAPPY THAT I STILL DID IT UEUEUE MEAN GIRL WONY MY BELOVED đĽşđ anyhow, i really, really hope you guys enjoy this and here's to more mean girl wonys in the future hehehe
p.s. i hope ya'll don't get bored too easily bcs wow there's a shit ton of talking in the first half of this ficâ
previous: magic words.
jang wonyoung was late.Â
to class.
which wasnât exactly all that surprising considering she thinks she can do whatever she wants. but she was never late to class. you would knowâyou were always waiting until she entered the room. it was like you were never calm until she appeared, but that was because you have had the biggest, lamest crush on her all year. even the professor took a pause when he called wonyoungâs name for attendance and nobody was there to respond with âiâm here, professor~â and a cheeky smile. you stared at the empty seat in the middle of the classroom, wonyoungâs seat, and wondered what couldâve been in her way for her toâÂ
âjust hold on for mommy, âkay?â
you dropped your pen, covering your red face with your hands. your seatmate gave you a brief look before going back to reading her notes. did you really have to think about that first thing in the morning? well, it wasnât as if it was all you have been thinking about for the past two weeks: wonyoungâs lips on yours, her hands all over you, her sweet voice soothing you, and her eyes looking at you like you were her last meal⌠you still couldnât believe that entire thing even happened!
ever since then, things have been really weird. a lot of people looked at you more when before wonyoung fucked you, you were usually ignored which you liked. and you knew everybody whispered about you and wonyoung too. neither of you were being discreet in that room in the library that day so you heard all sorts of things from your fellow students the day after. usually about how they didnât think you were that kind of girl, or how they never thought wonyoung would ever consider fucking âsomeone like youâ. see, other people would be mad if they heard some strangers say all those things about them but actually, you agreed with them.
everything about that day went against a lot of things that you thought about yourself. well, you werenât planning on staying a virgin forever but you really didnât expect for it to be taken by jang wonyoung of all people!
âcome on, baby. give me a show.â
you squeezed your thighs together, your heart hammering inside your chest. god, it almost felt like wonyoung was right up against your earâtalking to you and berating you for thinking about her 24/7 after she fucked you. you felt your core clench upon remembering how warm wonyoungâs hands were, how her fingers felt ramming inside you⌠god, you wanted it all again. but there was no way she would agree to that, right? knowing wonyoung and the kind of girl that she was, that would be the only time she would fuck you, right?
a pink jacket catches your attention, making you look up from your thighs. jang wonyoung has finally arrived. she was talking to the professor as she sat in her seat, all smiles and giggles as usual. she throws a brief glance over her shoulder, sharp eyes meeting yours. you didnât miss the way the corner of her mouth lifted up, smirking at you as she eyed you down. you didnât even know how the fuck she was able to do that within a millisecond of looking at you, but she did it anyway and it only made you squirm in your seat.
oh, how pathetic you were. youâve been feeling all sorts of things after wonyoung fucked you, but you never knew what to do about them. for now, you just wanted to get through another day of being in wonyoungâs presence despite everything thatâs happened. she hasnât spoken much to you since that day and you doubted that anything was going to changeâsheâs jang wonyoung after all. you were probably just another hook-up to her, something sheâs bound to forget about in a week or so.
(see, that was just all kinds of wrong because right at this moment, all the nosy people who were staring at wonyoung can clearly see how she spared your pitiful figure by the window little glances every other minute with a sly smile on her face. she didnât make an effort to be discreet. she never does. when jang wonyoung likes something, she is going to let people knowâshe has to! or else theyâll all just think youâre up for grabs.
no. wonyoung was going to show them only she can really pull all the nice girls in this school. especially youâ(y/n) (l/n), the campusâ adorably awkward bookworm whoâs very endearingly clumsy despite her well-put appearance. god, how wonyoung had become obsessed with you and you had absolutely no idea.
but it was more than just your character too. for a while now, actually ever since she fucked you, something about you has been bothering her mind. itâs made her unable to stop thinking about you and truthfully, it fucking pissed her off so much that she had to brainstorm a plan, a solution, for it. which became the reason why she was late today. will wonyoung actually execute it? who knows! for now, she can stare at you scribbling on your notes and laugh to herself because she knew, oh she so knew, that every time you paused, shut your eyes, and shook your headâyou were thinking about her.)
thankfully, the class ended after another hour and a half. halfway through it all, you got bored and opted to stare out the window. so much so that you didnât realize class was over until the familiar scent of money and local fame wafted into your noseâwonyoung had walked past you, and she winked at you. you found yourself freezing up in your seat, so fucking pathetic. nobody seemed to notice what wonyoung had just done which was fortunate for you! with bright red cheeks and ears, you packed up our belongings in record time and swiftly power-walked your way out of the classroom.
the attention that was put on you as you walked along the hallways of the building was annoying, for the lack of a better word. it seems like everybody was looking at you as if this was the very first instance of a loser somehow âgettingâ the popular girl to sleep with her. sometimes, you wish it never happened. as good as it felt, the aftermath was almost not worth it. youâve heard cruel things being said about you after that day and to save your enrollment, you kept yourself quiet and pretended like you were unaware. except that you werenât, so every time you make eye contact with someone and they start whispering to their friend or something, it only adds up to that pool of anger that was slowly building up from the pit of your stomach.
still, you couldnât bring yourself to blame wonyoung for it all. you were part of the act as much as she was but you also canât say that you brought all this attention and rumors to yourself. you blamed the other girlâs stupid reputation, actually. but itâs not like you can rewind time and make yourself leave that goddamn room when you thought wonyoung was never going to come. there was no point in dwelling on it now. it happened and you have to live with the consequences. being talked about isnât half as bad as the threat of your scholarship getting revoked anyway.
you were right on the other side of the building when you realized you had no idea where you wanted to go. you just wanted to get out of that classroom, away from wonyoungâs sights so she canât have you acting up in front of everybody. not that you would actually be able to make stable eye contact with her anyway. naturally, you found yourself marching towards the washroom. you were nearing to the door when you heard a few girls chattering lively.
you entered the washroom and there stood in front of the mirror were kim jiwon and shim jayoonâyour acquaintances and wonyoungâs super smart best friends from one of the science programs. they were the last people you wanted to see face-to-face and for good reason! as soon as they saw you, they squealed and grabbed your arm, yanking you to stand in front of the mirror with them. âthereâs the woman of the hour!â jiwon teased, lightly pinching your cheek.
âmore like woman of the weekâliterally nobody is shutting up about you! this must feel like heaven.â jayoon nudges your arm, firmly believing that you liked all of the attention you were getting when you really didnât. you would do anything to be invisible again.
âis this really what it feels like to be popular? i hate it,â you grumbled, earning a sigh from jayoon. âi donât know how you guys ever manage.â
âyou have an outdated opinion about all of this, baby girl! donât you like having everyoneâs eyes on you? now theyâll see how much of a pretty little thing you areâitâs great!â jiwon said. no, she was not very successful in convincing you that this wasnât the worst thing thatâs ever happened in your academic life so far. but you decided that you wouldnât fight her on it and instead, stand idly between the two girls while they gossiped and twirled and played with your hair.
you were completely signed off from the conversation; the only thing in your mind was the feeling of wonyoungâs hands in your hair while she kissed you. unconsciously, you touched your lips with your fingers. fuck.
âoh, youâve got it bad, huh?â jiwon teases.
âhey, donât blame (y/n)! wonyoungâs a good kisserâiâd miss her lips too,â jayoon sighs dreamily. then she gasps and grips your forearm tightly. âdo you want to fuck her again?â she asked with shiny eyes.
âw-what?!â
âwhereâd you get your information from, jayoon? wonyoung fucked her.â
âoh, right!â
you covered your face with your hands, âplease stop talking.â
jayoon forcefully pries your hand off your face, âlisten, gaeul-sunbae is having a party next week and weâll be there with wonyoung! you should come! weâll make sure to get you guys a room.â jayoon says with a wink. god, theyâd let the two of you fuck in a house full of your schoolmates?! that would just add onto your world of troubles.
âiâm not going to any party and iâm never sleeping with wonyoung again, okay? i justâi want this all to end. i hate it when iâm looked at.â you gently wiggled yourself out of the two girlsâ hold and once again marched towards the door.
âyou shouldnât have fucked her then.â jayoon says with a shrug as you reach for the handle, making you pause.
âshe fucked me.â you corrected your friend before swinging the door open and exiting the washroom.
âyeah jayoon get your facts straight!â you heard jiwon laugh as you bolted out of the washroom. you rolled your eyes, shaking your head, and glaring at the first person you saw in the hallway. the person in question raised an eyebrow before turning to talk with his friend, eyes lingering on your leaving figure.
gosh, this school was a nightmare.
nevertheless, you survive the long walk back to your classroom without sparing another person a glance. did you bump into people because you absolutely refused to look up? yes! did you care? not at all. it was much, much better than dealing with the scrutiny in everyoneâs eyes. apparently, sex was only a problem when the girl who wanted nothing to do with it actually did it. every time you remembered how everyone in the library looked at you after you and wonyoung left that private room, you wanted to scream. literally. all of the negative things that came after the event made you forget about the sweet stuff. like the way wonyoung insisted on driving you home, how she walked you to a bus stop when you refused to ride with her, how she patiently and wordlessly waited for your bus with you, and how she gave you a kiss on the cheek when your bus did arrive.
but what good was having wonyoungâs attention if everybody was also going to look at you, but in a worse light?
you knew it probably wasnât fair, but you grew a tiny bit of resentment towards the popular girl.
you entered your classroom after a deep breathâeyes glued to the ground and hands hidden under the straps of your backpack. it felt like you were back in high school all over again. this sucked so bad. but unfortunately, getting to your seat was only a bumpy road! all you had to do was not look up and start reading material once youâve sat down. it should be so easy. of course, fate had other ideas.
wonyoung had bumped into you while walking towards her own seat, forcing you to tear your gaze from the ground to look at her. oh, she was so prettyâno, (y/n)! âsorry.â wonyoung says with a cheeky smile. (she was excited that she finally got you to look at her. and as expectedâŚ) you blushed, merely looking away from the other girl before rushing to your seat. you heard a few giggles behind you which only confirmed your suspicionsâit was definitely planned. it didnât help that your cheeks and ears were flushed red⌠gosh, even your neck felt warm. you know what also didnât help? how wonyoungâs intense gaze didnât leave your figure for a while. you could feel her staring at you like you were some piece of meat for her to devour and you werenât even exaggerating by saying all that!
it was the same kind of look she was giving you right before she kissed you that day. despite your resistance, you met wonyoungâs stare. you noticed that she was surprised to see you raise your head, but it looked like it pleased her more than anything. wonyoung tilts her head and smiles slyly at you while her eyes travel from your hands, your exposed thighs, to your legs⌠now who knew jang wonyoung could be such a pervert? you squeezed your thighs together, glaring slightly at wonyoung who merely giggled before finally turning around and facing the front.
things like thatâwonyoungâs attention, her interest, her affectionâwere the only good to come out from that hook-up. the rest? the side-eyes, the rumors, the whispers, the unwanted popularity spike? you wanted nothing to do with it. but, again, it wasnât like you could reverse time.
so, you were going to do what youâve always been good at: hide yourself to the point of invisibility. itâs never failed you before, and it shouldnât now.
the only challenge was jang wonyoung herselfâwill she let you out of her sight?
you didnât want to think about the most obvious answer. instead, you tried your damned hardest to not think about her at all for the rest of the day. you poured all of your attention to the lectures, the coursework, and the notes. basically anything just to avoid hearing her voice in your head again. at least it wasnât as bad as the first few days after she fucked you. during those times, you quite literally replayed the entire thing in your head every minute. it wasnât surprising that you ended up failing a few small quizzes around that time.
when youâve put every belonging you had in your backpack, you practically rushed to get up from your seat and headed to the door. avoiding every eye that latched onto your figure. you successfully passed wonyoungâs seat without trouble untilâŚ
âah, (y/n)! finally, i can talk to you.â
ms. lim, the professor for your last class of the day, calls you. you turned around with a tight-lipped smile on your face, reluctantly walking closer to the teacherâs desk while most of your classmates walked out of the door. wonyoung was still in the room. she was staring. fuck, why is she always staring?!
âi wanted to thank you for all the help you gave last week for jiyoungâs little⌠âart for amateursâ club.â ms. lim sighed at the name (she has always hated it but ms. kim jiyoung, her fiancĂŠ, loved it too much to change it) and smiled up at you.
âno need for thanks, maâam. i was passing by the art room that day and i just thought iâd help.â you hear a few people shuffle behind you. more students walking out. a flash of pink walks by behind you. wonyoung. you blinked and smiled at the professor, acting as normal as you could.
âif you donât mind, i need you to do another favor for me,â ms. lim opens up one of her drawers and carefully takes out a lunch bag from it. the professor smiles sheepishly at you. âi hate to ask my students to do little chores like this. but iâm going to be preoccupied with grading and lesson plans for the rest of the day and that idiot jiyoung forgot to grab her food from me.â
you chuckled lightly, âhard to imagine ms. kim of all people would forget about her food. iâll take it to her, no worries.â you carefully held the lunch bag in your hands and smiled at your professor.
âthank you, (y/n). sheâs been all over the place lately! worrying about this one special pupil of hers that sheâs practically begging to put up a piece of her work in the walls of the art building. itâs a whole thing, i wonât bore you about it. run along.â ms. lim waves you off with a laugh. you bowed to the professor before happily exiting the classroom with ms. kimâs lunch bag in hand. when you left the room, you saw that the hallways were still quite full with students lounging aboutâlooks like it wasnât going to be an easy walk to the fine arts building but oh well.
the first hurdle was squeezing through a crowd of jocks from different teams creating a ruckus in the middle of the hallway. the second struggle was nearly getting picked on by said jocks when they just so happened to notice you sneaking by. thankfully, a nice cheerleader with red hair diverted their attention so you could slip away. it was a quiet and pleasant walk along the school courtyard towards the fine arts building from there, with only the wind and soft rustling of leaves accompanying you.
the building was quiet, save for your own footsteps. usually, the hallways would be filled with sounds of casual chatter and the muffled voices of instructors and students alike. you had to say though, you much rather preferred the silence. it was comforting. you were usually surrounded with a lot of yelling, hollering, and laughing which sometimes wasnât all that bad but considering everything thatâs been happening the fast few days⌠yeah, this was preferable.
it didnât take long for you to reach ms. kimâs classroom, and there you were met with a vast empty room littered with half-finished paintings and beautiful illustrations created by the students and ms. kim herself. there was a backpack and a big canvas set near the back of the classroom but you pay it no mind. it was common for students to stay after school hours just to kill time or work on their projects. you put down the lunch bag on ms. kimâs desk, all the more ready to turn around and leave when a particular painting caught your eye.
it wasnât anything special by any means. in fact, it was buried behind more colorful paintings and you could only see half of it. you approached the painting, looking around the other canvases just to see it in full. it didnât look finished, but then again maybe that was part of the appeal. the painting was that of an arrangement of beautiful flowers in a jar, they were wilting. or maybe they were just coming to life, looking at the soft streams of sunlight that shone down on them.
regardless, you didnât have the luxury to analyze the painting any further when you heard shuffling behind you. alarmed, you turned your head quickly and⌠well, fuck.
âwonyoungâŚâ
the tall girl clad in pinks and blues smiles at you. it wasnât a very comforting smile.
âthe one and only,â well, that sounded familiar. you watched as wonyoung threads the ends of her hair using her dainty little fingers. a smirk dances on her lips while she stares you down, very much liking how she has rendered you speechless with her mere presence. a bit of a dramatic statement but it was true! âhowâd you like my work?â wonyoung asked, eyes quickly flickering over to the flower painting behind you.
you followed her stare, but quickly looked back at her in shock. âyou painted that?â you gasped.
âyou make me sound like iâm just a stupid bimbo,â wonyoung sighs dramatically. âof course, i painted it. would anyone elseâs work look as gorgeous?â âcharmingâ as ever, wonyoung flips her hair over her shoulder with a smug look on her pretty face. you turned away, very quickly rolling your eyes before settling them back on the painting. you were impressed. you wouldnât have guessed that wonyoung of all people would have that kind of talent, but then again, she is one of the class-toppers and nobody knows who she is exactly.
âitâs beautiful.â you admitted. you heard wonyoung chuckle, but she doesnât say much else. you donât look back at her, choosing to stare at her painting instead. again, something stopped you from looking further into it. wonyoung stood beside you, briefly looking at her painting with a somber look on her face before quickly covering it up with her usual cheeky, queen bitch smile. it was dead silent. did you even want to speak to her? for two weeks, youâve resented all the attention that was given to you because of her. youâve glared at the back of her head, cursed her in your mind whenever some students whispered about you⌠but somehow, youâre the one whoâs tongue-tied now that you were actually alone with her.
it was confusingâfeelings, that is. hell, the last real face-to-face interaction youâve had with her was on that day. when she kissed your cheek before you got on your bus.
âwasnât expecting you to be here, (y/n),â wonyoung unzips her pink jacket, slowly taking it off before putting it on an empty seat. you watched her from the corner of your eye, she was taking deep breaths and you could hear her. then she fixes her hair and turns around wearing a glowing smile. âbut this is just perfect.â she steps towards you and instinctively, you jolted backwards.
âi-i just dropped something off for ms. kim⌠from ms. lim, i mean. i should get going.â well, it wasnât going to be easy! what with wonyoung being inside your personal bubble and your heart beating so fast that you canât quite hear your own thoughts. it didnât help that she towered over you, and again, her perfume was a fucking weaponârendering you immobile.
âdonât be like that, (y/n). iâm upset with you.â wonyoung says with a pout. cute, but you really shouldnât let your stupid crush on her stop you from just getting the hell away! wonyoung was fascinated with the way your eyes wandered. she knew that no matter how angry you were with her, she was always going to have the same effect on you. and it was delicious. being able to have that much of an impact on someone.Â
âyou never called or texted me. i was waiting, especially after i sent you home,â wonyoung stands even closer and for a second, you actually saw some kind of emotion in her eyes. dissatisfaction, perhaps. âdidnât know you were like that, (y/n).â
âi d-didnât even think youâd want me to contact you after⌠after all of that.â
âi wouldnât have given you my number if i didnât want you begging for more of me over the phone, dumbass.â wonyoung bumps your shoulder with her own as she walks past you. the way you looked (confused and⌠so fucking stupid) mustâve made her pissed, judging by the way she started dragging her equipment around with her eyebrows furrowed and eyes glaring at you every now and then. you stood there awkwardly, fiddling with the hem of your uniform. you should really leave. you had things to do at home! this wasnât a time to waste with someone who was mad at you and someone you were mad with.
all it takes was a period of silence to remind of how much wonyoung affected your life. and suddenly all the anger was back. the longer you stood there and looked at her, the more it boiled up and threatened to tip over. but you were going to be mature. you were going to leave the classroom and go on with your life, leaving it all (wonyoung) behind.
âi have a few ideas on how you can make it up to me though.â wonyoung averts her gaze from the empty canvas in front of her to you.
given the way she was looking at youâor rather, has been looking at you, wonyoung was up to no good. and if you wanted any chance to redeem the little reputation you had in this academy, you had to be strong and not get swayed by her and her pretty little face and those soft lips and that mesmerizing pair of eyes. you shook your head, âi am not fucking with you again, wonyoung.â
the taller girl laughed, âwhat? did it look like i was going to make you do that? gee, (y/n), it takes one hook-up to corrupt you, huh?â wonyoung laughs, a smirk making its way to her face when she sees you glaring daggers at her. âyouâre going to be my muse.â she says, crossing her arms and scanning you up and down. gosh, she didnât even bother to hide the lust behind her stare⌠but you could tell that her statement wasnât a joke.
âyouâre⌠going to paint me?â you asked. wonyoung hums, staring right at you as she pulled her hair up to a ponytail, quietly anticipating your answer while you stood idly by the windows.
âonly reason iâm here is because ms. kim has been begging for me to put something of my own up in the hallways. usually i would just refuse but the ladyâs been nice to me since i stepped a foot in this school so why not? plus, whatâs a better subject than my latest and possibly most popular fling?â wonyoung gives you a very sarcastic smile that makes you roll your eyes. you seriously needed to get out of here.
you were more than ready to leave until you remembered the way wonyoungâs eyes looked when she confronted you about the silence you gave her. then a pang of guilt hits you the more you think about her actions after the two of you hooked up. the walking together, the waiting together, and the kiss on the cheek. maybe attempting to cut her off was a dick move on your partâŚ
âokay.â
wonyoungâs face visibly lights up. adorable.
âwhere do you want me?â you asked, blushing at the sight of the cute look on her face. all of your activities can wait. you wouldnât have been able to live with yourself knowing that you were potentially hurting someone. albeit unintentionally and the person in question being your best slash worst nightmare.
âjust sit in front of me and weâll figure it out from there.â and so, you and wonyoung get to work. well, of course it was mostly her doing the work while you just sat on a stool and listened carefully to whatever she told you.Â
oddly enough, the weight of her stare wasnât as intimidating or nerve-wracking like it usually was. wonyoung had a certain softness in her eyes as she studied your features closely, and every time you figured that she saw something she liked, something would sparkle behind those beautiful brown eyes. watching wonyoung in what seems to be her natural environment⌠well, âunexpectedâ would be the understatement of the year. you figured it would be parties and social clubs and outlet malls but then again, nobody really knew wonyoung.
getting so much as a glimpse of the untouchable popular girl was truly something. and despite everything thatâs happened you find yourself feeling the way you did the first time you laid eyes on her on campus during freshman year. awestruck, with your heart nearly beating out of your chest as you desperately tried to look at something that isnât her but ultimately failing. wonyoung gives you a smile, and it wasnât her usual cheeky-teasing one. she looked⌠bashful? and is that a hint of pink on her cheeks?
it was strange to see, but you ended up smiling a little at the sight of a rare cute wonyoung. the tall girlâs cheeks show a deeper shade of pink as soon as your lips curled up in a smile, making you giggle a little. not a lot of words were shared between the two of you after that as wonyoung completely immerses herself in her work. and during that entire time you just stared at her, admiring her focused state. you wondered if she was concerned at all about making a mistakeâher hand moved skillfully across the canvas with the attitude of someone that was sure about their abilities. you would hear an occasional tut partnered with a quick hum and followed by a quiet, satisfied laugh, giving you the impression that wonyoung was confident about the picture she was painting of you.
youâve never been more curious in your life. you wanted to know how wonyoung sees you. it would be from an artistâs perspective but maybe youâll see even a spot of how wonyoung truly sees you deep inside. especially after everything that has gone down between the two of you, and especially after her reaction to you forcing yourself to forget her existence for two weeks. itâs not like you were looking for any chance of the popular girl returning your feelings, you just wanted to know if you were anything to her at all. maybe youâll get to know it here.
â(y/n),â wonyoung snaps you back into reality. she beckons you over with a proud look on her face. âcome over here. see if you like it.â
soon enough, you were standing beside wonyoung, staring at the most impressive painting in the room. it was you; sitting on that stool wearing a gentle smile, but almost half of your entire form was covered by a slightly see-through curtain and the tiniest streams of sunlight. at first glance, the painting looks incomplete or rather, abruptly finished but it looks perfect in your eyes. and on wonyoungâs eyes too, judging by the way she looked at her own work with approval.
âitâs beautiful, wonyoung.â you said with a grateful smile.
âmhm. itâs yââ wonyoung pauses, and clears her throat. âobviously.â she said, chuckling awkwardly and flipping her hair over her shoulder with less flair than usual. you did not know what the hell that was all about. (âitâs you.â wonyoung wanted to say. but she bit her tongue real quick. why? well, jang wonyoung was not one to try to woo a nerd of all things like that! but really thoughâitâs you. of course itâs beautiful.)
you were admiring the painting some more and the longer you did, the more you noticed just how many details wonyoung put into it. from the slight crinkle of your eyes while youâre smiling down to that tiny little scar you had on your right cheek. amazing.
âw-wait, youâre going to put this up in this building?â you asked, now blushing wildly. itâs not even that you were embarrassed of having your face put up in the fine hallways of this campus (there have been many instances of your face being plastered everywhere because of your very impressive achievements as an honor student). itâs the fact that wonyoung was involved in all of this that makes it all complicated.
âno.â
surprised, you looked at wonyoung with slightly widened eyes. she worked hard for this painting for the sole reason of putting it up, and now she wonât? maybe she sensed your discomfort at the thought of putting up a painting of you made by wonyoung, which you know would just repeat the never-ending nightmare of being surrounded by rumors all over again. you would ask the tall girl to give you a reason why, but you noticed that she was standing closer to you now, eyes darkened and very much drawing you in.
just like last time.
âfor my eyes only.â wonyoung says quietly. she was referring to the painting, sure, but she was looking at you the entire time. the implication makes your face heat up, and suddenly youâre finding it hard to do anything else except to just stand there. obnoxiously close to wonyoung with your eyes constantly flickering up and down from her eyes to her lips. you remember what those lips taste like, how they feel moving against yours. what you would give to feel and taste them all over again.
âi need a break,â wonyoungâs gaze pierces through your own, inviting you in. âdonât you?â
and all it took was the slightest nod of your head for wonyoung to lock your lips in a searing kiss with her own.
god, it felt like your chest collapsed within itself. your hands immediately cup wonyoungâs cheeks, and having learned a few things from the last time you kissed her, you were much, much better at keeping up with her despite your heartbeat running a mile a minute. wonyoungâs own hands were on your hips, pulling you closer until she started undoing the ribbon on your uniform. then, she unbuttoned your shirt, forcing herself out of the kiss and putting her lips on your neck as she did so. it was hard trying to keep yourself quiet with the way wonyoung nibbled and softly sucked on your skin⌠which was why you just stopped trying.
âahh⌠mhm, wonyoungâŚâ your moans were met with a hum from the taller girl, whose kisses now reached your chest.
âyou missed me, didnât you?â wonyoung whispers against your skin, leaving a mark just below your collarbone where she likes it best. she tilts her head up, lips hovering over your own, only touching slightly. âyou missed mommy?â
fuck, that was gonna do you in.
too embarrassed to truly admit it all, you nodded, which earned you a pout mixed with a glare from wonyoung. âiâm gonna let that go once. youâre lucky i missed you more.â eventually, you found your waist pressed against a lone desk while wonyoung continues to kiss you. you were topless now, what with wonyoung discarding your white shirt somewhere on the floor.
âw-what if ms. kim comes inâŚ?â you asked when you felt wonyoungâs hand sliding up your thigh. surely she wonât be as careless as last time, right? the two of you were barely hiding! the curtains didnât leave much to the imagination and the door was only halfway closed⌠if you werenât careful with your mouth, some unlucky soul passing by will catch the two of you and you really donât know if you can handle more of that. maybe you were naive to expect wonyoung to change within two weeks, because right after you asked your stupid little question, wonyoung had pulled down your panties and unclasped your bra from behind. goodness, she works fast.
the tall girl decided not to waste time and completely disregarded your question. âup.â she taps your hip, urging you to sit on top of the desk behind you. as you were getting yourself settled, wonyoung takes the opportunity to stare at you. you were as cute as everâflushed cheeks, messy hair, lips quivering, and pretty eyes glossy with anticipation, even though you tried to disguise it with uncertainty. wonyoung couldnât believe how easy it has been to knock down your defenses. she was so sure that even she, the jang wonyoung, was going to get rejected and embarrassed for the very first time in that library, given your reputation as a hardass.
but alas, she always gets what she wants in the end. as she should!
you pull wonyoung closer, eager to feel her lips on yours again. then she allows you to kiss her, doing the same exact thing as last timeâstaying still and letting you do what you want. wonyoung noticed that your kiss was softer, more careful. you were holding her face so gently, caressing her cheek with your thumb before letting your hands fall to her shoulders, giving the control back to her. it warmed her heart in a way that took her by surprise, but that was nothing compared to the pure amusement she felt when she caught you untying her ribbon.
âyouâre brave today, hm?â wonyoung whispered with a smirk. she doesnât stop you, though! she holds your stare as you let her ribbon drop to the ground, and then you start unbuttoning her shirt so excruciatingly slow. you stopped halfway through, only getting to see a little bit of wonyoungâs crimson red bra before putting your lips on her neck. and finally, for the first time, you heard her whimper.
you couldnât see it as you were busy kissing her neck, but wonyoung was a blushing mess. she never whimpers! but with your sudden courage and the way you left the softest and sweetest kisses on her neck, wonyoung couldnât hide it. âare you⌠marking me up?â wonyoung asked with a giggle.
immediately, you stopped, staring at her with half-widened eyes. âis that okayâŚ?â
wonyoung wouldâve called you stupid if the sound of her own loud heartbeat didnât render her speechless. âdonât tell me youâre going to ask for permission if you so much as want to put your hand on my waist or something.â wonyoung said. she can imagine it clearly in her head, actually! you were too polite for your own good.
âwell, consent is importantââ
âyeah, yeah. how about you use that pretty mouth of yours for something worth my time, dummy?â wonyoung urges you to kiss her again, craning her neck to give you access. and you did it happily! you were so obviously excited that even wonyoung thought it was endearing, laughing lightly as you gently sucked on her soft skin. you did that for a while. how could you stop, anyway? the mix of wonyoungâs sighs, feeling her thin, dainty fingers smoothly threading your hair, and her other hand laying still on your thigh, squeezing ever so often when you do something she likes⌠well, suffice to say that it was almost impossible to stop.
leaning back, you stare at your work. the sight of your marks on wonyoungâs neck only made your core buzz, making you not-so-subtly close your legs. wonyoung regains her composure, eyes darkened once again before she forces her legs open, one hand slowly sliding deeper up your inner thighs while the other keeps your legs apart. âsince youâve had your fun⌠naturally, itâs my turn now, correct?â and of course you were nodding your head eagerly like an obedient pet, just how she likes it.
your breath gets caught in your throat when wonyoung cups one of your breasts in her hand, her face dangerously close to the other one, more than ready to pleasure you. âi was thinking of being nice since i missed you⌠but you made me upset with your stupid tantrum over the last time we fucked,â wonyoung feigns a smile and a shiver runs down your spine. âso, to truly make it up to me⌠youâre going to take everything iâm giving to you today.â
scary. terrifying even, but how could you say no? the (y/n) of two hours ago would be really disappointed of you but fuck it. wonyoungâs got you wrapped around her finger once again and youâre going to let it happen again.
only moans escape your lips as wonyoungâs warm mouth closes around your nipple. a new sensation, and it was wonderful. you found yourself hugging wonyoungâs neck, pushing her face impossibly closer while she licked and sucked as she pleases. your cunt clenches around nothing, and you buck your hips slightly just to urge wonyoung to touch you down there even a little bit but you shouldâve expected that she wouldnât care about that. her hands were rather busy! one played with your other nipple while the other held your thigh in a grip so tight that it almost hurt.
wonyoung releases your nipple from her mouth, her lips now attacking your chest area with little bites. you werenât opposed to it. in fact, the frustrated look on wonyoungâs face was a delight to see! âshouldâve known you were going to be a pussy about it all⌠wouldnât have waited up all night for your text if i did.â wonyoung tightens her grip on your thigh, making you wince. but the pain was quickly overshadowed by pleasure as the tall girl pulled on your nipple.
âhow was i supposed to accept that you didnât want anything to do with me anymoreâŚ? you were screaming my name so sweetly in the library⌠and i was in your head after all of that, right?â wonyoung briefly lets go of your thigh to pull your hair down, forcing you to meet her eyes. âi know you did⌠in the end, the campusâ smart goody-two-shoes is just a fucking slut in the making, isnât she?â
wonyoungâs eyes shine with excitement upon seeing you look at her so desperately. she knew that youâd never take any insult if you were in your right mind⌠and it only turned her on when you said nothing to her, your head so clouded that youâd allow wonyoung to say anything she wants to you. the tall girl spreads your legs apart, staring at your glistening pussy before her hungry eyes pierce back into your own. âand to think that you wanted to leave when youâre all drenched like this! what would you have done if i let you go? surely not touch yourself,â wonyoung laughs, but it was a cold and mocking one. your cheeks flush with embarrassment since she was rightâyou canât bear to touch yourself, which is why youâre so desperate to have her fuck you already. âyou need me, and i want a pretty doll i can play with however i like. letâs help each other out, (y/n)-ah.â
wonyoung doesnât wait for you to say anything (of course she doesnât) and starts massaging your clit with her thumb. you gasped at the sensation, holding onto her arms and almost closing your legs up. you try to control your sounds this time around, all that left your mouth were the usual pathetic whimpering and panting but at least you werenât loud! wonyoung didnât like that, though. she presses her thumb harder against your clit, making you whine loudly. âthatâs more like it.â the tall girl muttered under her breath. the longer she pleasured your clit, the sooner you were losing control of yourself. and eventually you were just giving into what your body wantsâgrinding against wonyoungâs hand, pulling her closer so you can kiss herâŚ
you gasped sharply as wonyoung plunged her two fingers inside your cunt, and she was giggling at how you were wrinkling her shirt up due to how tight you were holding onto her. fuck did it feel good to be filled up. when wonyoung curls her long fingers inside you, you clamped your hand over your mouth, afraid of alerting anyone who may be lurking around. annoyed, wonyoung swats your hand away, âcome on, i donât want to punish you so early.â none of what she was saying went through to your head. and it wasnât even because you were trying to be a disobedient brat but because of her pace.
she snaps her wrist with each thrust, enough to make sure that you feel every inch of her fingers inside you before pulling out. it was hard to focus on anything, even more so when wonyoungâs pretty brown eyes were raking all over your body, getting familiar with your features once again. it wasnât everyday something catches her eye so easily, but when she entered that secluded room in the library and had the luxury of staring at you while you were asleep, she was charmed. not even she thought that she would have you on top of this table merely two weeks laterâwrithing under her touch and moaning her name, but wonyoung quite liked this outcome.
why, after you were so good for her the first time she fucked you, youâve been on her mind!
âa-ah..! wonyoungâŚâ your sweet voice snaps the tall girl back to reality. youâve completely wrapped your arms around her neck now, how precious. wonyoung puts her lips to work, wanting to taste your skin once again. and that she does! giving you kisses from your cheek, to your jawline, to the crook of your neck and all that the way down to your chest. conveniently, the desk was long enough for wonyoung to be able to pull you down so youâd be lying back comfortably. she towers above you, a grin on her lips as she watches you try to hold on to your climax.
it was so glaringly obvious that you were close. with the way your walls clenched around wonyoungâs fingers, a few more thrusts should do it. and that made wonyoung way more upset than you can imagine. there was no way you were going to make this so short, right? but she feels it. not only have you dug your nails on her free wrist trying to hold onto her, youâve also started whining very loudly. wonyoung, annoyed, wriggles out of your painful hold and shoves her thumb inside your mouth, effectively shutting you up. drool starts dripping down along your jawlineâwonyoung wasnât going to let you off easy judging by how she pressed her thumb flat and hard down on your tongue.
âweâre gonna make this last, baby,â wonyoung says. she sees the tears pooling in your eyes and it only makes her feel warm inside. she was getting so excited to have her way with you, and a few tears wouldnât stop her. âand everyoneâs going to know again. i know you donât like that but this time⌠theyâll know youâre mine.â
wonyoung didnât plan on saying that last part out loud but thankfully enough, you were way too busy moaning her name to even hear it. a knot tightens in your stomach and you gasp, the sensation becoming all too familiar with you now. wonyoung pulls her thumb out of your mouth and slowly slides a third finger inside your cuntâand then there it was.
âawwâŚâ wonyoung cooed as you came all over her hand. but she doesnât stop any of her movements. instead, she leans down, catching one of your nipples with her mouth and continuing on fingering you through your orgasm.
âf-fuck..! wonyoung, w-waitâŚ!!â you clawed helplessly at her back. amidst your hopeless whining and moaning, wonyoung just giggles. her eyes flicker up to get a brief glance of your face, her own core clenching at how tight youâve closed your eyes, how youâve bitten your lower lip to the point of it hurting. she absolutely loved getting to see you undone piece by piece⌠even more so when you allow it to happen. which is what you finally do as you bury your hands in wonyoungâs hair, pushing her further down your chest and whimpering sweetly at every flick of her tongue on your nipples.
wonyoung wasnât letting her hand rest, however. she keeps fingering you in a semi-fast pace, hoping to edge you closer to another orgasm. clearly, she was taking advantage of your dazed state and in all honesty, of her own adrenaline-driven state. in her right mind, she would have let you cum the first time and stop there since she knew you canât handle too much of what she can really give you but god⌠wonyoung just has to see you fall apart completely under her.
âsomeone learned a few things from last time, hm?â wonyoung teased as she gently massaged your clit in circles with her thumb. âyouâre taking it so well. good.â
you gasped loudly as she plunges her fingers knuckle-deep inside your walls again, now thrusting faster than ever. wonyoung completely gets lost at the feeling of your warmth around her fingers. with her towering above you, she was distracting enough for your mind to wander elsewhere. every so often youâd notice the way she slightly bit her lower lip, whimper quietly, and huff as she fucked you⌠and as your eyes trail down lower (as low as you could, anyway), you saw that the tall girl had been clenching her thighs together. gods, wonyoung looked so hot being desperate like this.
it made you blush, how much she wanted to feel as good as she was making you feel good. next time, you are going to make sure to return the favor. it was what she deserves, as much of a pain in the ass she was.
âare you okay, (y/n)âŚ?â wonyoung, concerned that you have spaced out, asked. her thrusts have slowed and her eyes are now softer.
you nodded meekly, âyes, mommy.â the nickname slipped out so naturally that it caught wonyoung off guard. and was she⌠blushing? flustered, even?
(wonyoung wouldnât even know where to start if someone were to ask about the hold you have on her. it almost sucks that you donât know about it, but wonyoungâs pride wouldnât let her admit it outright. not yet, anyway.)
âweâre almost done.â wonyoung regains her composure. she completely pins one of your wrists down with her free hand, the other ramming inside your walls out of control, and her forehead nearly touching yours while you moaned helplessly. with your one hand, you clutched the edge of the desk, refusing to hurt wonyoung any further because you knew you would make her blood had you decided to hold onto her with the way she was abusing your pussy. wonyoung chuckles slightly at how smoothly her fingers went in and out of youâher hand was completely drenched in your cum and wetness. she was practically drooling at the thought of getting to taste you.
wonyoung would rather do it from the source, but she knew you wouldnât be able to handle her mouth. not at this state. and not with all the things she wants to do to you with her tongue alone.
she feels you clenching around her again, and she watches as tears squeeze out of your eyes. she kisses them away, whispering some comforting words in your ear before she thrusts her fingers knuckle-deep inside you. wonyoung intertwines your fingers since she knew youâd need it as you came all over her hand once again. unlike last time, wonyoung makes sure her hand is still, only pulling out as youâve started to calm down a little. your eyes wandered all over the ceiling, still trying to get a sense of things. you could feel wonyoungâs eyes on you though, but you couldnât tell what she was doing.
so âsurprisedâ would be an understatement when you feel her clothed, wet cunt pressed against your knee. wonyoung smiles bashfully as she slightly grinds her clit on your knee. hell, she nearly fucked you into unconsciousnessâshe shouldnât have anything to be afraid of doing now. even if she has to become this spectacle for you.
âj-just need to⌠do something about this.â wonyoung says. her voice was a bit higher from her whines, obviously feeling so good that she canât help but show this new side of herself. underneath her, you were a bit rattled but completely flustered and quite confused as to what you should do. not that you could do anything, anyway. you couldnât really feel your legs and your head was still getting itself situated. you were basically watching wonyoung grind herself into you⌠and it was heaven.
wonyoung meets your stare and grins, âliking the show, babe?â she teased. she giggled when you covered your face with your other hand, you were so red. but you were brazen enough to raise your knee slightly and pressed it against her clit, making her moan out loud for the first time. a smile of satisfaction spreads on your faceâyou finally heard wonyoung make that kind of sound!
âcheeky little doll.â wonyoung says before leaning down and kissing you. she stops her grinding, having had enough for now and slowly pulls you to sit up, carefully.
much like the last time this happened, nothing much was said afterwards. you were merely hugging wonyoung while you recovered, and youâd smile every time you felt her leave feathery-light kisses across your shoulder and draw random circles on your lower back. wonyoung allowed you to hold her for as long as you needed, never worrying about how the sky has turned orange or the supposed project she was assigned to start today for ms. kim. a gust of wind seeps through the slightly open windows and you shiver.Â
finally, wonyoung pulled away. âletâs get you dressed up. ms. kim should be on her way anyway.â she helps you stand on both feet and picks up the random pieces of clothing scattered around the area, almost scolding herself for throwing them around haphazardly. wonyoung was the one who buttons up your shirt, makes sure your skirt is all nice and tidy, ties up your ribbon perfectly, and styles your hair as if it was never a mess. and then she decides that you would look cute with a bit of lip tintâbut also because you needed a good excuse to give people if they so happen to ask you why your lips were so red and fucked up.
you stayed still as wonyoung dolled you up. it was strange though, because at this point, she has fucked you three times and youâve bravely looked at her in the eye then but now you canât. every time her eyes flicker over to yours, you blink and set them elsewhere. you canât tell her about how your pussy clenches under her gaze. you canât tell her that if she does something so simple as this, helping a fellow girl to look presentable, it turns you on. and it probably wasnât even because nice-and-friendly wonyoung was a rarity! it was because of that damn crush. and how you can still feel her hands all over you but ugh, youâre so tired of coming to that conclusion.Â
you get it: you are morbidly obsessed with how wonyoung makes you feel! god, can i be any more pathetic?
âyouâll text me this time, right?â wonyoung asks after she is done. she has also gotten herself look as perfect as she always does.Â
âi canât exactly escape you now, can i?â
âmhm! glad youâre aware of that.â wonyoung puts on an exaggerated smile, but really, she was excited.Â
you then pulled out your phone and sent wonyoung a simple âhiâ text message. âthere. happy?â you mimicked her fake smile.
âecstatic, actually.â wonyoung replied with a straight face as she stared blankly at your useless message. she saves your number and suddenly snaps a quick photo of you without warning, setting it as her contact photo for you. when you tried to sneak a peek, wonyoung moved away from you with a laugh, and saved your name as âdumâ on her phone, even waving it all over your face and laughing even more at your disgruntled reaction. how mature⌠and endearing.
when silence started to fill the air, you almost wanted to ask wonyoung a few things about this whole⌠thing. whatever it was. as much as you liked the whole doll talk earlier, you didnât exactly understand it. were the two of you going to be friends-with-benefits now? well, more like barely-acquaintances-with-benefits. was wonyoung going to make a habit of cornering you at some isolated place and fuck you? because really, youâd prefer a small warning before she starts using you. confused as you were, you didnât let a word slip. you just stood there, watching wonyoung as she put up an empty canvas on the easel.
âis it okay if i rest for a bit before leaving?â you asked in a quiet voice. wonyoung nods as she pulls her hair up for a half-ponytail, only briefly looking at your figure as you walk past her to sit on the instructorâs chair at the front of the classroom.
âiâd insist on taking you home but you seem to adore public transportation.â wonyoung quipped from behind her canvas.
âyouâd only find some excuse to touch me again in your car so yes, maybe i prefer taking the bus rather than that.â you replied. attempting to avoid thinking about wonyoungâs hands all over you while you sat on the passenger seat of her car was futile, thank goodness she was focused on whatever project she was working on.
âthanks for the idea.â oh you just knew wonyoung had a stupid smile on her face thinking about it all. that pervert!
although you would be lying if you said you werenât into the idea, but that was something the two of you should save for much, much later.
for the rest of your time there, you merely sat on ms. kimâs chair. sometimes you watched wonyoung even though you couldnât see much of her face. occasionally, however, she would peek from above the canvas to check on you and you wouldnât look away like you usually would. you would hold her gaze, smiling softly before gazing at the setting sun outside. the only thing that was on your mind was how everything has changed now. whether it was for the better or for worse, you couldnât tell yet.
there was no use dwelling on it. you simply have to see where things go. one thing was for sure though: jang wonyoung wasnât going to be out of your life so easily.
you pondered on that chair for a while before you finally decided to leave. you promised wonyoung that you would text her as soon as you got home, and you knew that even though she barely gave you a glance since she was so focused, she was happy that you promised that. while you headed for the door, you felt wonyoungâs eyes follow you until you were completely gone. but even as you walked through the empty hallways once again the hair on the back of your neck stood on end and you found yourself stopping in your tracks completely on top of a flight of stairs.
âthat⌠really all just happened. again.â you mumbled. ugh, your ears felt hot. your cheeks too. matter of fact, your entire body was just warm.
âwhat happened?â a chipper voice nearly makes you jump out of your skin. ms. kim has suddenly appeared beside you. you hadnât noticed that she was already there when you turned to the corner.
âo-oh! ms. kim, hello,â you greeted, hand clutching your chest. âah, right. i dropped off your lunch bag. ms. lim said you forgot it earlier.â
âreally? thank you, (y/n). she must be very busy if she couldnât visit me herself. iâll make sure to tell her that you did well delivering my food.â the art teacher pats your shoulder. her smile was striking and infectiousâno wonder ms. lim always looked so lovesick around her!
âno need. itâs no problem at all,â you glanced at the giant clock on the other side of the wall and felt panic rise from the bottom of your stomach. âmy bus should be making its way to the stop now. have a good day, ms. kim!â and so you were off to running as fast as you could to catch your ride, leaving the art teacher baffled but quite amused at the stairs.
ânever seen (y/n) a bit loose in the head like that before.â
inside the art room, wonyoung has gotten busy. the tiniest specks of paint decorated her face, her hands had become quite the mess but what mattered was the picture she was creating. she was quite surprised with herself. only earlier did she feel that familiar rush of creating something with efficiencyâwhen she was painting you. she was feeling it again, and it was great. it has been quite some time before she felt that rush. as rich her mind was with concepts, wonyoung found it hard to materialize them in a painting for some reason. maybe she was just lazy. maybe the pictures in her head just werenât clear enough.
but somehow you of all peopleâof all things, reallyâmade it all so very clear.
âah, the things a good pussy does to the human mind.â wonyoung laughs at her own words. she couldnât wait to bother you all night long later.
âi knew it!â
once again, ms. kim has surprised a student. fortunately enough, wonyoung didnât make a mistake and only flinched slightly. âhello, ms. kim.â the tall girl greeted. she doesnât take her eyes off her canvas since she knew that the teacher was already sauntering towards her with that contagious energy she always has.
âwow. i half expected you to be struggling for inspiration as usual but you actually got somewhere!â ms. kim pats wonyoungâs head, very much satisfied at wonyoungâs progress with her work. oddly enough, wonyoung found herself blushing deeply letting ms. kim look at a personal piece from her so freely. not that she gave a fuck about keeping up her reputation even with the teachers, but jang wonyoung was nothing if not so stubbornly prideful.
because no! she cannot bear being teased about painting (y/n) (l/n) for the second time in the same day!
âis thatâŚâ
wonyoungâs blush get deeper. here it comes.
âshe did say she came by this room⌠i see!â ms. kim laughs and nudges wonyoungâs arm, teasing the girl as if she was some kid who was having a crush for the first time in her life. incorrect, by the way! because jang wonyoung doesnât do crushes.Â
the art teacher leans back and allows herself to fully take in her studentâs work. it was a beautiful painting of you, surrounded by orange and yellow colors, looking lost in thought as you gazed out the window. your face was slightly obscured by the curtain, similar to the previous painting of you that she has done. perhaps a clue as to how wonyoung truly sees you.
ânever thought youâd want a muse, wonyoung! but sheâs not just that, is she?â
wonyoung settles her palette and paintbrush on an empty stool, exhaling and stretching her sore shoulders. now, she wasnât the one getting fucked but damn, did you exhaust her too! it was in the good way at least, so wonyoung canât really be mad at you. with you in her sick little head, wonyoung offers a mischievous smile to her teacher, âmy cute little secret is what she is.â
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Could I get headcanons for Feitan, Illumi, Leorio, and Chrollo falling for gn!reader who by all means seems like a strong, nuturing, emotionally stable individual but every once in awhile casually says or does smthin that makes people go "Oh you're a little fuckin nuts, actually"
(e.x.: Most of their D.I.Y. furniture is made of different kinds of bone, morbidly interested in the more gorey parts of their jobs, probably works in a field that allows them to be around the dead often like a taxidermist or a mortitian, highkey just unabashashedly a morbid little freakâ˘ď¸ whenever it comes up naturally in conversation but otherwise comes across as just an attentive lil guy you could bring home the average parents would love.)
HXH Men with a Morbid!S/o
Characters: Leorio Paladaknight, Illumi Zoldyck, Chrollo Lucilfer, Feitan Portor
Type: Headcanons, Gn!reader
this is so me
Warnings: dead things and body parts and stuff
Leorio Paladaknight
being an aspiring doctor, Leorio thought that your knowledge on both human and animal anatomy was pretty useful
at first he didn't think much about your job and just assumed you were some type of doctor or biologist or something
he often asks you questions as he studies and you're a pretty good tutor
the first time Leorio realized you were kinda weird is when one day you were walking down the street and saw some roadkill
and you were like "aww too bad, the skin and bones are too damaged to harvest"
and you kept walking like it was normal while he was like ?!!??!?
or you guys were having a normal conversation and you say something like
"if you died i'd taxidermy you and re-articulate your skeleton so you'd be with me forever <3"
1 taxidermizing humans is illegal and 2 WHAT
he is cold sweating wtf did he get himself into
when he comes to your house for the first time and sees a bunch of bones, animal skins and wet specimens he damn near passes the fuck out
how do you just casually have dead things and remains around your house!?
AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU MADE YOUR COFFEE TABLE OUT OF CAMEL BONES?
he is freaking the fuck out and you're just like "dw everything is ethically sourced :D"
yeah he thinks you're a freak and he is too fearful to break up with you ever (not like he was planning to anyways)
Illumi Zoldyck
whatever drew Illumi to you had to have been some type of power
aside from that power, to Illumi you were relatively normal and had a good grip on your emotions which made you a perfect candidate
that being said he could care less what your job was, you'd just end up working for or with him eventually
when he started bringing you around the estate, you often sought out their guard dog Mike and Illumi couldn't think of why
that is until you came back one day with a human femur and bright smile on your face
"... where did you even get that?" "From one of Mike's victims. If I collect enough I could make a whole set of bar stools!"
he blinked at you and chose to ignore your statement
i mean, to each their own am i right?
so you have ah hobby, big deal
Illumi just thinks you're pretty normal personality wise until you randomly but casually drop information about what you do in your free time or have in your home
so now whenever he has a job Illumi calls you in for cleanup
you get to do.... whatever it is you do and there's no evidence of a dead body left behind, it's a win win
Chrollo Lucilfer
he couldn't care less what your job is because it's probably not worse than his đ
he didn't really notice anything "morbid" about you until he asked about your jewlery
you wore things like resin caster bug pendants or bird skull earrings and stuff
he just assumed they were fake and you bought them because they looked badass
but then you told him you make it all YOURSELF
he is intrigued
he doesn't really question you past that because you were probably buying the bones and stuff somewhere (spoiler alert you're not)
what really caused him to think was when you casually just picked up a dead rat off the floor in some abandoned building you were exploring and suck it in your pocket
bro was so confused
"What do you need that for?" "To make a new necklace :3"
yeah now he knows that your odd taste in jewelry goes deeper than just that
he won't judge you though, if anything you're a better person than he is considering you don't kill things yourself
he is literally a murderer and a thief and has committed like 3467633788 crimes so he couldn't judge even if he wanted to
so now when he sees dead animals and what not he bags them up and brings them to you
he likes to sit in on your cleaning and making process
you seem like a perfectly normal and sweet person to everyone else but Chrollo knows about your freaky little hobby and it just makes him like you even more
Feitan Portor
I feel like for you and Feitan to even be acquainted you have to be part of the troupe
whatever you do outside of it is your business
buttttttt since you are his s/o and Feitan is probably homeless he crashes wherever you are
thus him finding out about your hobby and other job
out of everyone on this list he is the most interested
he too is a morbid little freak
he goes with you to find things and will help you with the cleaning/taxidermy or whatever process if you let him
what he doesn't understand though is why you don't just kill the things you want instead of hunting for already dead things
sometimes he will go catch like a squirrel or something and bring it back to you like a cat and tell you he found it like that
Fei baby. No the fuck you didn't
after doing what you're doing for so long you can tell what caused an animal to die but you wouldn't tell him that
he's just so cute and wants to be supportive of your hobby <3
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FIRESIDE. ⸠farmhand!rafe cameron au [1.1k]
summary. rafe cameron. everything you need and more.
ę° WARNINGS ęą ŕźâ⼠afab!reader, farmerâs daughter au!, reader calls her dad âdaddyâ but itâs obvs not sexual (itâs country. itâs a country thing itâs normal.), porn with minimal plot, ooc rafe (heâs just sweeter in this lmao), mutual pining, friends with benefits, except reader has such an awful crush on him, unprotected p in v, public sex (no one sees), against a barn oops, dirty talk, fingering, praise, creampie.
reign speaks. i have a rlly bad obsession on the farmerâs daughter aesthetic rn so pls just bare with me while i literally milk the ever living hell out of it. a lot of farmerâs daughter/country auâs in the drafts rn. rafe, leon, ghost, you name it. just let me cook yâall i swear something good will come of it i promise LMAO. sorry about any spelling errors i wrote this in two hoursđ
⢠â ę° masterlist ęą ę° nav ęą
rafe cameron had an incredible way of making you feel both wanted and wholly confused all at once. he could be at your feet, begging you to follow him around whilst he did his farm work for your father, to keep him company and fill his ears with your voice of honey. heâd look at you as if you yourself had put the very moon and stars in the sky, as if youâd put them there just for him. hell, he even carved a small heart out of wood and attached it to some ribbon and gently wrapped it around your wrist.
heâd do all this just to continue calling you his friend.
his friend that he occasionally fucks dumb every week. the friend whose brain he turns to mush with his sweet words as he thrusts his cock deep into your cunt. the friend that he spends more time pleasuring than himself.
this time was no different. just another time when you snuck out of your bedroom window and into the warm night, illuminated by the soft hues of the moons glow. the note he had slipped into your hand earlier in the day had been discarded in a box under your bed.
(where you kept all of the notes heâd given you. shamefully, you must admit).
now, you find yourself being pressed against the side of your fatherâs old barn, towered over by rafe, mouths colliding in mutual desperate need. you pawed at his clothe covered chest, taking the fabric in your fist. his hand held the back of your neck while the other gripped at the skin on your hip, having pushed itself up and under your floral cotton nightgown. his fingers toyed with the waistband of your panties but never dared to go further, not yet.
the feeling of rafe took over your senses. he rendered you unable to form any thoughts other than him. it was embarrassingâthe effect he had on you.
he pulled away against his own wishes to catch some air. but the look in his eyes, the look, forbade you from breathing any air at all.
âi missed you today,â he confesses. his voice is like silk against skin. smooth and gentle. âwhereâd you go?â
you smiled at him. âran some errands with daddy. needed tâ get a new rake since someone broke the other one.â
âi told you, it was an accident!â
the laugh that escapes him makes butterflies form in your belly.
âi know, âm just teasinâ.â you run your hand through his hair. when he leans back in and kisses you deeply, gently nipping your bottom lip, you tug lightly at the roots of his hair. the groan he lets out sends shocks through you.
you felt anticipation build up higher and higher when rafeâs index and middle fingers grazed over your clothed cunt, feeling the wet patch and knowing how wet you were already. he applied slight pressure to your clit over your panties, making you whine desperately.
ârafe, please.â
he made a faux pouty expression, displaying fake confusion. âwhat? iâm just teasinâ.â
he is not mocking you right now.
he let out a small laugh before dipping his hands into your panties and finally drawing small circles on your clit. you moaned a little too loud at the sudden feeling, making rafe clamp his free hand over your mouth.
he then pushes a finger, then two, into your sopping cunt, curling them slightly. your eyes practically roll to the back of your head. you were thankful he had your mouth covered, otherwise you wouldâve woken up not only the animals on the farm, but also your parents inside the the house.
rafe wasnât holding back, giving you exactly what you wanted and needed. âgod, sheâs so wet fâr me, baby. you been missinâ me? missed my words? my fingers? my cock?â
you nodded the best you could with his hand on your mouth. your abdomen constricting with every sharp jolt of pleasure he gave you. an all too familiar feeling was rising too fast for you to prepare for.
but just as quickly it came, it left when he retracted his hands entirely.
you wanted to plead, you wouldâve if not for the mouth guard, but instead you attempted to grab at rafeâs hand once again. he just shook his head, shushing you softly and undoing his belt with one hand. christ, you couldâve cum right then.
âdonât worry, baby, iâm gonna take care of you.â
he pulls your panties down and they pool at your ankles. you only have time to step one foot out of them before heâs grabbing at your leg and pulling it against his waist, your panties hanging from your ankle.
rafe takes his hand off your mouth and instead wraps it around your neck and captures your lips with his. in one push, he filled you to the brim with his cock.
your jaw falls slack as moans upon moans escape you. there was nothing rafe couldâve done to muffle you now. with him hitting every spot inside of you that had you seeing stars, you were done for.
the wood of the barn walls scraped against your bare shoulders, rafeâs hand sneaking up and under your nightgown to grope at your tits, pinching your nipples.
ârafe, rafeâfuck!ââ
âwatch your mouth, princess,â rafe warns. the nickname making your mind swirl. âi know it feels good, yâpussyâs just squeezinâ me. like it wont let me move.â
ââm sorry! âm sorry!â you could barely think. his cock stretched you so much, providing the perfect combination of stinging pleasure.
once again, you felt the knot in your stomach getting tighter and tighter the more rafe fucks his cock into you. you attempted to grasp at any part of him that you could get ahold of and the only word you could mumble out was his name, over and over, until you finally let go. your body spasmed, eyes screwing shut in pleasure. rafe fucked you through your orgasm before he came inside you, against his better judgment. his hips stuttered back and forth, grinding himself against you as much as he could until he had nothing left to give you.
he stilled as you two caught your breaths, until he eventually pulled out and fixed himself back up.
âlift your foot, baby.â
you lifted your foot as he said and he put it through your panties, lifting them up your legs and resting them back against your wet cunt. his cum pooled from you and into your panties, but you didnât care. youâll just wash them tomorrow.
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Pawrentâs Day Out
charles leclerc x female reader
summary: you, charles and leo head out for a much needed break on the sea
warnings: none :)
a/n: i know i know im the worst updater and writer ever, but im back slowly but surely, and this is so so tiny fyi i just wanted to get something out đ
Race season was always taxing in many ways, one being the time you and Charles got to spend together when it came to your relationship. You didnât really have the luxury of travelling to every race like others wags, especially not when you had sweet little Leo.
Leo had been to a few different race weekends but of course the noise and being without either of you, wasnât the easiest nor safest place for the puppy.
âSnacks, drinks, towelsâŚdog treatsâŚcan you think of anything else baby?â
Your voice called out to Charles as you checked over the bag that rested on the kitchen counter, Leo was waiting patiently, sitting at your feet.
âNo I think thatâs perfect mon amourâ
Pressing a kiss to your cheek, he took the bags, leaving you to pick up Leo and hold him to your chest, taking his leash and one of is favourite toys.
Charles didnât have to leave for Barcelona until Tuesday so this weekend was all about your little family, and what better way than to take out the yacht and enjoy the warm weather on the water.
âThis was a good idea my love, we should do this more often..â
âI couldnât agree moreâ
The boat rocked softly with the waves, Leo ripping apart the little dinosaur toy on the floor as Charles sat next to you, his arm sliding around your shoulders and tucking you into his side.
âOur little familyâŚcouldnât get more perfect than thisâ
You couldnât help but agree, there was no more perfect moment than right here, with the love of your life and your little baby Leo. Someday thereâd come a ring, and many kids to fill your home with laughter and so much excitement.
âSomeday, weâll have little meâs and youâs running around on this boat CharâŚyou ready for that?â
A small laugh spilled from his lips as she nodded his head, pulling your chin up to place a kiss to your lips
âWith you? Iâm ready for anything..â
It wouldnât happen for a few years, but the thought of it made your hearts swell, the future would be full of endless possibilities, something the two of you were more than excited and ready for.
But for now, right here on the warm water, this was all both of you needed..
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Lucifer with an artist reader
ăťâĽ Youâre hosting an art class, and the nude model is someone you never expected
| Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 |
xx: itâs a long one yâall đ weâre still in the pre-dating era! Slowburn, anybody? Forget the crumbs, have the whole loaf of bread, my swans âşď¸
warning: brief mentions of nudity & mild swearing
After Luciferâs initial tour of the hotel, he started coming around much more often.
He was beginning to reconcile with his daughter, and that meant making up for all the years he had missed out due to his self-isolation.
When Lucifer came to the hotel for Charlie, he always made time for you.
At first, when you had still been busy working away at the paintings for the hotel, he had used the excuse that he was just coming over simply to âadmire the art.â
Nevermind that he crossed the entire hotel just to look at some paintings, but you never pried him about it. Youâd be lying if you said you werenât waiting in anticipation for his visits.
Sometimes, he would lean against the door frame in silence, watching as your brush glided across the surface of the canvas. He dared not to disturb you while you worked. Too afraid heâd cause you to slip up and place your brush in the wrong spot, ruining your piece.
He never would admit it, but the soft, feather-like strokes you made always seemed to lull him into a state of tranquil bliss.
If he had the opportunity to sit there for hours and watch you paint, heâd probably drift off into a peaceful sleep.
It was ASMR for the King of Hell.
You werenât always sure whether he was admiring the painting, or you. You were too concentrated on making a leaf of a tree, or the surface of the water just right to trace his gaze.
Youâd think with Lucifer being the embodiment of pride and his rank as ruler of the realm, heâd have demanded your attention instantly.
Instead, it was you who usually spoke first. âAre you going to sit down?â Youâd tease with a warm smile, greeting him with a bat of your eyelashes as you soaked your brush with fresh paint.
âOf course, I just wanted to see your progress, itâs looks beautiful as always.â
You had hummed a thanks as he strode over to the flat cushion in the middle of the room, and collapsed in it. He had now claimed it as his personal spot ever since he had first used it when you let him use his wings for reference.
Every time he made himself comfortable, he would exhale a large sigh of relief, like he just walked out of a noisy and over-stimulating circus show.
His tolerance for people in general was still pretty dicey, but here, in the quiet corner of the hotel, he could reset his mind.
And with you there? He didnât feel so lonely. Even in your silence, your presence and the multitude of large paintings leaning against the walls was all he needed to keep his mind from drifting off into darker thoughts.
âBoy, do you work fast. I canât imagine what Hell would like if you were the one running things.â
âProbably terrible,â You had laughed, âI may be able to create art under time constraints, but the pressure of an entire realm on my shoulders? Weâll let the super-powerful-fallen-angel deal with that.â
âThere goes my vacation,â He had sighed dramatically.
Sometimes, heâd catch you humming to an ancient tune, and every time heâd ask you about it.
âWhat song is this?â Heâd ask, genuine interest lacing his voice.
âInnsbruck, ich muss dich lassenâ
âIâm not even going to pretend to know what that meansâ
â âInnsbruck, I must leave theeâ ,â youâd laugh, âItâs a German song and is, you guessed it, from the Renaissance.â
âOh, right. Germany. Yeah, they were our biggest influx of souls back in the early 1900s,â He replied, âMustâve been fun people.â
You shook your head at that. Right, âFunâ, that was a rather.. surface-level take on what that country had gotten into during that period of time.
âYou should tell me more about the Renaissance.â Heâd ask with puppy-dog eyes, which always made you set down your brush and turn to him. A content smile spreading across your face.
Your knowledge of such a time always intrigued him, the Renaissance as a whole did. For so long, he had desperately clung onto the hope that some of humanity would go on to create great and beautiful things due to his actions. That his Fall wasn't all for nothing.
Slowly, that hope fizzled out, and Luciferâs growing delusion that Earth mirrored the sinful realm of Hell in more ways than one plagued his mind.
And then you appeared, passionate about Manâs most beautiful creations. Art, music, long-ago writings of sappy declarations of love in the form of poetry, and times when humanityâs intellectual and innovative nature flourished.
âIt was absolutely magnificent,â Youâd start, drawing from the depths of your mind all the imagery you could remember from when you were alive, âFilled with all kinds of artistic expression, painters that filled the ceilings of churches with heavenly imagery-â
Lucifer had snorted at that. This era in time had such a romanticized idea of what Heaven and their Creators were like. He pitied their ignorance.
â-and beautiful music. They were known for bringing to life a worldview known as Humanism. It was meant to bring back ancient philosophy â like from the Greeks â to uplift people to participate in the betterment of humanity, and to perpetuate much more virtuous actions. There must be a whole city full of them up there, I can't imagine anyone from that period ending up down here with how protective they were of their moral code.â
Heâd always listen attentively in silence as you educated him. Sometimes, heâd even pull out the classic yellow rubber duck toy he held so close to his heart, and begin to fiddle with it as you spoke.
When he worked on them in your room, heâd curate them especially for you.
âLook! This one can refill your palette with the bestest freshest paint!â Heâd exclaim as he wiggled it in the air, âAnd it still quacks!â
Every time, youâd pull up a cushion across the table from him, and rest your chin on your hand as you watched in amusement as he demonstrated his work.
In this instance, he squeezed the sides of the duck and it let out a pathetic Sqeaaooo and a glob of paint slid out of its mouth and plopped right onto the table. It splattered, leaving a few droplets on his pretty white overcoat.
Lucifer was a messy fella, and times like this made you growl quietly and reach for a wet cloth from your cleaning bucket. Hastily trying to rid his clothing of the bright red paint. Your movements across his sleeve made his body tense, and his breath quicken.
For someone who easily flustered you with abrupt acts of affection like the first time you met, Lucifer had the uncanny ability to turn his face as red as his cheek spots when you displayed such care towards him.
âIt's still a work in progress.â Heâd bashfully assure you every time something like that wouldnât go as planned.
Youâd wish Lucifer displayed such creativity outside of the yellow bath toy, but you promised yourself to help him down that path.
You could only imagine how many ideas this man had stored in that head of his, and you had a feeling youâd get him to wake up eventually. The thought of being there for him â with him, made your cheeks hot.
When it was finally time for him to leave the hotel â sometimes hours later, youâd walk him to the door of your little atelier and heâd turn to you, with that charming smirk and half-lidded look.
âArenât you going to say goodbye to Charlie?â You had ask, as he adjusted his hat and coat to depart.
âI already did before I got here,â he replied nonchalantly, as if you two existed in completely different buildings. Nevermind that she was a flight of stairs and a few halls away.
There were no more bold kisses to the limbs from him after your first meeting, to your displeasure. Even thinking about it gave you feelings that tugged painfully at your heartstrings and made you beg internally for more.
You desperately wished for him to softly hold your hand once more, to feel his lips graze your knuckles, to drink in the warmth of his touch.
Instead, he clutched his staff tightly, and dipped his hat to you.
âUntil next time, Darling,â his voice, like silk, had echoed as waves of gold surrounded him. In a blink of an eye, you were left alone once more. Your heart pounding just like the first time, and every time after that.
Today, your heart was pounding just as fast. Except there was no Lucifer in sight.
Three days ago, you got a call from a good friend of yours who ran an art studio on the other side of Pentagram City. She realized she had double booked her classes, and had begged you to take over one for them.
âIâve never taught anyone beforeâŚâ You had trailed off over the phone, apprehensive to the idea.
âNonsense! You are so well spoken, and youâre fantastic at this kind of stuff,â She exclaimed, âItâs not that hard, all you have to do is sit there while they trace the model and step in a few times to give them some tips on techniques. They arenât a beginner class, so they shouldnât need much instruction. Youâre also in charge of guiding the model with the poses, but I already have a sheet that has them all, so you just need to follow along.â
You stood there for a moment, thinking. This was something totally strange to you. What were art classes like in Hell, anyway?
âOh, AND they are going to be nude. At least partially, we make them cover their um, nether regions. That shouldnât be a problem for you, right? I mean, you get paid for it soâŚâ
Your friend trailed off, and the line went quiet for a moment as you mind raced. You looked around the now -empty atelier, your paintings finished and hung up around the hotel. You had nothing that was stopping you from doing it, not your skills, your time, or even the fact that the model was going to be exposed. You were in Hell, seeing someone like that was an almost daily occurrence. Telling her no just because of your nerves was a douchy thing to do, and you were far above that.
âFine.â You conceded.
âYAYY!!â She shrieked in happiness, and you had to yank the phone away from your ear before it could start to bleed.
The next few minutes were her telling you where, when, and what to do. You had listened intently, memorizing her words. You didnât want to make a fool out of yourself in front of strangers that you were teaching.
After hanging up the phone, had you went downstairs and to the hotelâs lobby to inform Charlie of your new job.
âIâm really sorry if this interferes with me working here, but I just couldnât leave her hanging.â
âPffft, itâs fine,â Charlie had waved it off, âYou accepting the position as my new interior design manager is more than enough, iâm just glad youâre getting out of your comfort zone like this!â
You sighed a breath of relief. Good, no issues. You were worried she would have said no, and the fact she knows about Lucifer visiting you? Well, you werenât sure how she was taking that. You never dared to ask, nor did she make any kind of indication her feelings about that.
âWhatâs it like?â She had asked, breaking you out of your thoughts.
âItâs nothing too bad, I think I might actually like it. I just help them with their techniques on mastering figure drawing by using a model as a reference. My friend says they are still looking for one to pose, so hopefully they find one in the next few days.â
âInterestinggggggâ Charlie responded, her eyes holding a mischievous glint to them. You could see the gears turning in her head, but what for, you had no clue. You didnât ask either.
You had spent the next few days preparing, you even had visited the studio. It was very pretty, and the room you were in was small, but rather homey. You had more confidence with your ability to lead the class now after locating specific areas of importance.
Which lead you to present day. You were hurriedly scrambling around the room, grabbing anything of necessity.
Your eyes jumped to the clock, and a squeak of panic escaped you as the classâ starting time got closer and closer. Finally placing the last pencil in your bag, you raced down the stairs, beelining for the door.
âWhere you going in such a rush, Hot Cakes?â Angel Dust called out to you from the bar, Husk next to him as he poured Angel another drink.
âTo class, do you know where Charlie or Alastor is?â You questioned them.
A rush of wind tickled your back, and you whipped around to see the Radio Demon himself looming behind you.
âHello, my friend!â Alastorâs toothy grin on full display.
âI heard you were looking for Charlie, unfortunately she left not too long ago. She said it was something of great importance, and that it could shape the future of the hotel. But do not worry, I am here to assist you!â
You placed your hands together into a praying motion, trying your best to appeal to the demonâs better nature. If he had one.
âCan you pretty, pretty please send me to the Regal Fortune Studio? Iâm doing a class there and I need to get there on time.â You begged.
Alastorâs eyes squinted in thought. Before his smile widened more than ever.
âAlright, I suppose so.â
You didnât get to utter a thank you before the demon snapped his fingers, and dark energy crackled around you. Cold suddenly gripped at your shoulders, and your vision blurred.
You squeezed your eyes shut, unsure of what would happen next.
âPlease donât kill me, please donât kill meâ
Suddenly, light hit your eyelids and you slowly opened them to see the studio before you, just steps away from the front door.
You exhaled a sigh of relief, before yanking open the door.ďżź
The door to the classroom was slightly ajar, and you could hear faint voices inside. Indicating that everyone but you was ready to begin.
You crossed the lobby, ready to pull on the handle of the door, before a slight movement in the corner of your eye caused you to turn your head.
At the far end of the room, you could partially see long, blonde hair sticking out into view. Then, you heard the stranger speak to herself. Quiet grumblings of a feminine voice as they berated themself.
You raised an eyebrow.. could it be?
âCharlie?â You asked slowly.
The stranger squeaked, their hair pulled out of view. You heard a thump against the wall, as though theyâve pressed themselves against it in an attempt to hide.
You slowly tip toed the hallway, before whipping your body around the corner, surprising the mysterious figure.
âCharlie!â You shrieked in surprise at the sight of her, crouched against the wall. Her eyes widened in shock, and she let out a shriek of her own. Her eyes darted around, before she pulled herself up to meet your gaze.
âOh my gosh heyyyyy, I didnât expect to see you here!â She mocked innocence.
âBullshit,â you retorted, âI told you where I was going like three days ago. Why are you really here?â
Sweat beaded on her forehead, and she bit her lip. As if she was deciding whether to tell you the truth, or another lie.
Suddenly, she let go of the breath she held, her shoulders dropping in defeat.
âOkay.. the truth is, when you told me you were hosting an art class I was so thrilled! For you, of course. But then, I thought about how much you and my dad were getting along! Then, I thought about how you guys seemed to have the shared interest of art. So I.. told him about the class?â
âAnd?â You questioned, irritation lacing your voice. You really did not have time for this.
âAnd I told him about how you were still looking for a model, and you know how he is. He doesnât have a problem doing things like that in front of people, and heâs getting better at being around people in general..â
You gripped Charlie by her shoulders when she trailed off again, shaking her.
âSpit it out! What about your dad?!â
âHE AGREED TO BE THE MODEL FOR YOUR CLASS BUT I HAD NO IDEA THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO BE NUDE UNTIL WE SHOWED UP BUT HE JUST SAID GOODBYE AND WALKED INTO THE BACK ROOM!!â
You stopped dead, your breath caught in your throat. You turned your head slightly, eyeing the classroom door.
âYour dad⌠is in there⌠naked?â You finally managed to get the sentence out, your gaze returning to Charlie in a look of disbelief.
This was a joke, right? There was noooo way you were going to walk in there a minute and see Lucifer there. This was just a terrible (-bly good?) dream.
Charlie nodded in defeat, her head hung low.
âI donât even have the mental strength to go in there. I couldnât stop him, even if I wanted to. He was dead set on this.â
You rubbed a hand along your face, gathering your thoughts.
âWell, thereâs no stopping it now,â You said, rolling your shoulders in preparation, âGuess I have a class to teach.â
âHave fun..?â Charlie smiled innocently at you. Her plan was working, after all.
You shot her a glare before crossing the lobby once more, and pulled open the door. You stepped inside, breath hitched, and gently shut the door behind you.
In front of you, four older women sat behind easels with a blank white canvas attached. If they noticed your arrival, they didnât show it. Instead, they giggled in the direction of the slightly lifted stage. You couldnât see who was on the stage, but the familiar voice with giddy amusement told you exactly who it was.
âYouâre finally here!â Lucifer called, and you did nothing but stand there for a moment.
Straightening your back, you exhaled a deep breath, and walked forward. Right past the stage. You kept your eyes in front of you, ignoring the golden gaze that trailed your figure.
You positioned yourself between the platform and the women who had finally stopped giggling and whispering to each other, and cleared your throat.
âHello, everyone. Iâm your instructor for today, unfortunately Renee couldnât be here today. Weâll be going over the usual though, figure drawing with the model present today.â
You squeezed your eyes shut, before opening them with renewed energy.
Slowly, you turned on your heels and pivoted in the direction of the platform. Your eyes widening at the sight.
Before you, on a long, red couch lay the King of Hell. Lucifer Morningstar, in all his glory. Shirtless, with no pants in sight. Thankfully, a thin, barely-hiding-anything sheet covered his waist section.
You met his gaze, a playful smirk etched on his lips. He wiggled his eyebrows at you, gauging for a reaction.
You made sure not to give him one. If he thought he was going a reaction from you in front of all these people, he was wrong.
âLetâs start by doing a quick sketching exercise, take about ten minutes to do your best and draw the model in front of you. Once the timer goes off, weâll review and go over some techniques, before switching to a much longer pose.â
You clicked the timer, and the faint ticking of its gears cemented you into reality.
âIs that Lucifer?â One of the ladies whispered to her friend a chair over. Her friend shrugged, âI have no idea.. but boy, is he handddssoomee.â
You pressed your lips together, trying to ignore their gossip.
Sitting in the chair farthest from the group, you crossed your arms, your gaze resting on the floor. Was he looking at you right now?
You sat there for a moment, before realizing you couldnât ignore him forever. He was the model after all. Soon youâd have to be helping him change poses anyway.
You looked up, drinking in the view. He was lazily leaning against the back of the velvet couch,
His hair, with no hat to cover it, stuck to his face messily with sweat. As he adjusted his head, a few strands of curls fell in front of his eyes. His intense stare slightly masked.
Was the room getting hot, or was it just you?
His eyes were locked on you, that stupid smirk still on his face. You sent daggers back to him.
He replied with a wave of his fingers.
You refused to let yours eyes travel any farther than his face, not ready for what kind of images your mind would give you regarding what was underneath the sheet.
âDid you know the Renaissance was pretty famous for constantly expanding its artistic art forms?â A voice smooth as butter filled the silence.
What the hell was he doing?!
âBelieve it or not, the naked human was a very big inspiration for many of their paintings. No sheet in sight.â
Some of the women perked up in interest at Luciferâs words. You couldnât tell if they were actually interested in what he had to say, or just to hear his voice as it commanded the roomâs attention.
âFor an era so virtuous,â He teased the last part, reminding you of your discussion days earlier, âThey so did love their scandalous marble status.â
He let that sink in, and you rolled your eyes dramatically at him. You couldnât believe this was how Charlie planned on setting the two of you up.
A candle lit romantic dinner? Nah. A trip to the movies? Boring, apparently.
Were you against the idea of getting closer with the âBig Boss of Hellâ? Of course not! He made you laugh and was actually interested in your ideas. This was just not how you expected it to go down.
âKeep talking, pretty boy!â One called from behind her easel.
Before he could speak again, the timer shrieked in your palm. You shot up from your seat, clasping your hands together loudly.
You turned your back to Lucifer as you began instructing the class, showing them a few techniques on how to straighten their lines, and how to hold their pencil just the right way that would give them a much thicker line for specific parts of the body.
âAlright, now, weâre going to have the model switch positions.â
Grabbing the paper that held all the different poses, you held it out to him, your finger tapping against the specific one in question. It showed the figure in a front facing view, one hand closed in a fist supported their chin, the other tucked neatly underneath. As if they were listening intently to some hot gossip.
âIâm afraid I canât see whatâs on the paper. Perhaps, if you come a little closer and show me?
You groaned internally, he was enjoying this too much. You strided over to him. His gaze followed you, his grin only widening as you closed in on where he laid.
âYou need to turn facing them,â You commanded the King himself. He pivoted, his body fully facing the group of gawking onlookers. He gave them a wink, and they hid behind their easels, their whispers fast and beathless.
âNow, you have to move your arm.. like this.â You spoke, reaching out one hand. You hesitated for a minute. Youâve never been so.. upfront with like this.
Reaching down, you gently circled your fingers around his wrist. Slowly, you allowed your hand to slip down, reaching his forearm.
His body was hot to the touch, and you felt like melting right then and there. Maybe it was time just to accept defeat, this man was just too good looking.
You felt the muscles of his arms shift, and you halted for a half a second.
Did he just tense?
Maybe you werenât the only one who could be teased.
You guided his arm forward, and then up. Sliding your fingers, ever so gently, around his knuckles. You squeezed, and his hand enclosed into a fist. You guided it underneath his chin.
âTouchy today, arenât we?â He spoke quietly to you, his voice dripping with velvet allure as you positioned him as the image on the paper showed.
âYou be quiet.â You scolded him, trying your best to bring on your most serious face.
His quiet chuckle in response made you drop the face instantly. It was obvious you were pretty bad at this kind of thing, at least compared to Lucifer.
You grabbed his other arm, and gently tugged it underneath. Letting it lay neatly below him.
Taking a step back, you admired your work.
You were going to return to your seat, before a thought crossed your mind. You took a step forward, closing in on Lucifer again.
âAnd one more thingâŚâ You started.
Using two fingers, you grazed the bottom of his chin, firmly pressing upward. Instinctually, his head followed the motion. He met your eyes, his gaze intensifying.
âGood boy.â You teased, your voice laced with a hint of sultry satisfaction.
You didnât miss his pupils dilating into slits and his breath hitching slightly. You just turned on your heels, not giving him a second glance before returning to your seat.
You tilted your head at him slightly, looking at him through your eyelashes. Your lips curling into a provocative smirk as you gripped the timer.
Maybe now this would be an even match.
âBegin.â
Time flew by once more, and this time, Lucifer refused to meet your gaze. Instead, he was purely focused on the easels in front him.
âTell me, my dear artist,â He began, addressing the demon woman before him. Her eyes widened when she realized he was speaking to her.
âIf we were back in the Renaissance, would I make quite the muse?â
âPardon?â The lady asked timidly, her voice coming out in a whisper.
âHow about a statue? Think about that. Tall, Marble-skinned, and⌠lacking this rather uncomfortable cloth.â
The womanâs face turned bright red. Her mouth opened and closed, her tongue refusing to cooperate. Lucifer knew how to play this game well.
Then, he turned his head to you.
âWhat about you, stranger? Would you think iâd look good in such a form?â
You crossed your legs, leaning back in your chair.
âIf the statue could stay quiet, while the class finished their work. Then, perhaps.â
The angel huffed, averting his gaze. He blew a few strands of hair out of his face, before continuing his blank stare at the wall.
The timer in your palm rang once more. You lifted yourself out of the chair. This was it, the last pose.
You strided back to Lucifer, his smoldering gaze on your figure as you approached.
For this pose, he needed to be off his stomach. You werenât going to roll him like a log, or go anywhere near his torso. That was too brazen of an act for you to commit to, at least with all the eyes on you. Instead, you squeezed your eyes shut and gripped the white sheet. You tugged with all your might.
With an oomph he rolled along with it, he shoulder blades digging into the cushions as he landed exactly where you wanted.
Before the ladies could get even a glimpse, you hurriedly adjusted the sheet back onto him.
âImpressive, bending the devil himself to your will.â He commented as you continued to adjust his arms.
Ignoring him, you moved onto his legs, positioning them slightly.
âCareful~â He chided.
You said nothing to that either. Once he was in the correct pose, you released him. You glanced at his hair, now messily covering his face.
You reached forward and, splaying your fingers, pushed his hair back behind his head. You let your nails softly graze his scalp before you tugged them free.
âSorry, canât have your curls covering your face for the girls back there.â
âI bet they wished they were in your position,â Lucifer hummed âFew rarely are.â
You chuckled softly, âPlease, the view looks better from back there.â
He let out an audible âHa!â as the words left your lips and you turned away from him once more. You knew that mustâve stung, sending a blow to the prideful kingâs ego.
Thirty minutes went by as you sat there, you spent more time examining your hands than meeting the gaze of the angel across the room.
This had turned into quite an eventful class, you couldnât lie. You also didnât expect such a shameless attitude from Lucifer, he was much more timid back in your painting room. Perhaps there was a side of him you still had yet to meet.
To be honest, sitting here, watching the clock tick by, you were pretty surprised this man had managed to stay near-perfectly still these past few hours.
Another thirty, and the timer rang its last chime. You had been positioned behind the drawing ladies, giving them critiques on their work.
You ignored the fact it was Lucifer you kept staring at on their canvas, instead simply regarding it as charcoal lines in need of straightening.
You wished them farewell at the doorway as they left. You hoped they had at least a pleasant time, since theyâd have at least a good story to tell to their girlfriends over the phone.
Shutting the door with a soft thud, you sat there for a moment before your shoulders dropped in exhaustion. You honestly werenât used to that kind of atmosphere, since your work consisted of you alone in a quiet room all day.
Taking a few steps backwards farther into the room, your gaze landing on the couch atop the platform. It was empty. Your eyes widened, did Lucifer just leave you here?
You rushed out of the classroom and strode into the lobby, searching for any signs of him.
âWow, that little sneaky piece of-â
âIâm right here.â Came a familiar voice behind you.
You jumped, whipping around to find Lucifer dressed fully. Hat and all. Now this is what you were used to. Crossing your arms, you raised an eyebrow.
âWhat was that back there?â You motioned to the room behind you.
âMy daughter invited me to look good in front of people and I did an outstanding job, as usual.â
âAs the model? You couldnât have just used your position as King to get a spot behind the easel instead?â
Lucifer grinned widely, leaning back against the wall. Could this have been his plan, and not Charlieâs? Now you werenât so sure.
âUnfortunately, not many of us have a skill as perfected as yours with a brush.â
You accepted that praise. You had worked hard for it.
âAnd, not many people have as great of a photogenic face as me. So, weâre square.â
You chuckled, shaking your head as you walked away. Lucifer kept pace as you both exited the studio, heading toward the curb.
âThat reminds me,â Lucifer halted, reaching into his pocket to fish for something.
You stopped beside him, the mystery item in his coat pocket piquing your interest.
âI fixed it!â He held the the paint-vomiting rubber duck out to you, wiggling it in delight.
âYou did?â
âThatâs right. This bad boy can now pop out six different colors, you just have to pull its beak.â
âThat actually really cool,â You laughed, taking the rubber toy from him. You turned it in your hands, maybe later youâd pretty it up with some fresh paint.
You looked up at him again, his golden eyes shimmering from the bright neon backdrop. You have much more to say to him, but your thoughts were jumbled from the day. There was one, though.
âYou know, next time you should just ask.â You gripped the duck firmly in the palm of your hand, lowering your arm.
âAsk what?â
âDonât play dumb with me, Luci. Youâre telling me you hijacked my class because you had a change in career choice?â
His smile turned playful again, and he pivoted to face you, shrugging nonchalantly.
âMaybe, maybe not. That depends if iâll be seeing you next week?â His eyes met yours with a questioning stare.
You gave him a warm-hearting smile, nodding your head.
âAs always.â
His smile widened, and with a tap of his staff. Golden waves cascaded around you. It wasnât cold, like Alastors. Instead, it was warm and relieving, like face planting into your pillows after an exhausting day.
As your vision began to obscure, you saw his face peak into the cascades of light, his hand reaching forward.
âI almost forgot.â His voice echoed, distorted by the magic as it circled them.
His hand enclosed around your own, and planted a kiss right onto your wrist. His lips lingered for a moment, as did his grip around your hand, as if your time together was too fleeting to let go.
You promised silently it wasnât.
The light rushed over you suddenly, and you had to squeeze your eyes shut to keep from being blinded. Luciferâs touch vanishing with your sight.
Feeling your feet planting on solid ground, your eyes widened to familiar surroundings of the hotel lobby. You were home, and Lucifer was no where in sight.
âHey, Hot Cakes!â Angel Dust called, still seated in the same spot at the bar, âHowâd it go?â
ââââââ
đ¤ alright, let me know what you think of this!! your comments are appreciated, esp if you have any ideas on what to do next!
đ the kisses are getting higher! part 3?
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Once again , please tell me if you're uncomfortable writing it, but Ford being so starved of touch, having so many places of stimulation touched on his body and being praised that he's accidentally cumming very quickly in his pants during a heavy make out session!
He says a little "Oh! :( " when it happens.
He feels very mortified and ashamed, tries to hide it first to make it unnoticeable (he failed big time at it). His girlfriend reassures him, tells him it's okay, it's hot and there's nothing to be ashamed of. â¤ď¸đ
-đ
Work Break
700 words,, Stanford x reader
a/n â Couldnât think of a song title this time, I feel out of character. Also this isnât proofread.
warnings â NSFW, dom!reader, at what point in the series this takes place is unclear, gender neutral!reader, sub!ford
summary â Reader helps Ford take a break from work, he gets a little excited.
You kiss up his jawline and land on his check before he decides to protest, âI have mountains of work that I have to get back tooââ
âJust wait, baby,â You make your way over to his mouth, feeling that heâs about to abject again, and so you roll your hips ever so slightly on his slap.
He was half-hard from the attention, and he sucked in breath when you did it. A paper was still in one hand, as heâd refused to give in yet.Â
âY/nââ He warned, voice now shaky, but was cut off with a disgusting kiss on his lips.Â
Your hands explored his body, caressing his chest, and tracing on his arms, before settling on his pecks. For a nerd, he had a wonderful body. You always thought that.Â
You broke away from the kiss, drawing a sound of disappointment from Ford, which he tried to cover up by clearing his throat.
âYou deserve this, you know,â You remind, tugging at his collar to flash a little bit of skin on his neck. You needed a place to sink your teeth into.
âDonât be absurd, iâve barely gotten anything done today. I deserve a slap on the wrist and an order to get back to workâ ahâ ahââ
You sank into his neck while he was talking, and licked the spot after you were done, âYou know thatâs not true, Ford.â
And you were being honest. Whenever a new project caught his attention, he acted like it was the end of the world all over again.Â
âYouâve done so much already, itâs coming along good,â You pluck the papers out of his hands either mild protest from Ford, and take his hand afterwards.
âYourâ doingâ soâ goodââ You plant a kiss on every one of his fingers inbetween words, Ford blushes and looks away, muttering something about how heâs ânot necessarily doing good, barley done anything..âÂ
To make the make out session a little more to Ford taste, you take his other hand and do the same thing. This time, rolling your hips ever-so-slightly against his, now fully hard, cock.
He whimpered, and you took the opportunity to interlock lips with him again. Pushing your mouths togetherâwith excessive spit, if youâre being honestâyou continued the slight roll of your hips he seemed taken with.
At some point, your hands let go of his, and went to his hair. You deepened the kiss once more. In between breaths, you commented things like, âSo good, ford,â âYouâre so beautiful,â âSo smart, baby.â
The entire time Ford had been whimpering into your kiss, hands now placed on the side of your hips and grasping at the fabric on your shirt. His pants had tightened noticeably during this time, and he was hoping you wouldnât notice the precum beginning to stain the top of his pants.Â
You had a way of turning his brain to mush that, surprisingly, he didnât just allow. He craved. Your attention was positively unmatched, especially when your moving like that, or how your tongue his doing that thing he likes, or how your saying such sweet things andâÂ
 Oh.
Ford whined uncharacteristically and buried himself in your kiss. His hands moved you down on his lap so you wouldnât notice what happened.Â
It didnât work. You opened your eyes with a quizzical look and tapped the crotch of his pants, then breaking away fully to look down.Â
He was still hard, but it was apparently heâs finished earlier by the embarrassing stain on his slacks.Poor thing.Â
âI-iâm sorry, y/n. I gotââ he rubbed the back of his neck apologetically, ââcarried away. I guess, uh, I should cleanup and⌠Oh god, iâm sorryââ
Your face looked sympathetic, as it guided his chin back to meet your gaze, âNo, no, itâs fine, Ford really. Itâs cute you got so excited.â
His looked lightened at this, but you continued before he could talk.Â
âIn fact, why donât we do it right this time? If youâre up for round two.â
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Petnames with stray Kids
Pairing: skz!ot8 Ă Gn!reader (individually)
Genre: fluff, headcanons
Synopsis: which pet name would the stray kids boys use when referring to you
Warnings: mentions of food in Seungmin and Lee Know's, I think that's it
A/n: I had this idea for a while but only wrote it now. Hope you all like it <3 | 1k event
Chan
I've said it before and I'll say it again, he would call you by a pet name in your language. However, if he had to choose an English one, it would probably be "baby". It's something that he finds endearing and at the same time it shows his protective side.
"I miss you [ ]. Just a few more months and I will be back home."
Lee Know
I believe he would call you something in his language. It's the idiom he learnt first, the one he carries more meaning. He might not be the best with words but he wants you to be sure that he loves you, so he always tries to call you something that comes deep for him
"Have you eaten already yeobo? I just cooked some lunch, I can bring it to you."
Changbin
"Babe." I am a firm believer that he has thousands of pet names for you, going from the sweetest to the cringiest ones in a matter of seconds, but babe would probably be his favourite. It's neutral to anyone who listens to it, however it seems special every time it's between the two of you. It's perfect.
"Babe, are you free tonight? I thought we could go on a date."
Hyunjin
He has a big vocabulary of petnames, but they all start with "my". My love, my angel, my dearest and the list goes on. He doesn't even want to be possessive about it, it's just that this was the way he found to express how important you are to him.
"My love, are you coming to practice today? I really wanted you to see our rehearsal, I think you will like it."
Han
"Darling". I know it's kinda a consensus that he would call you "baby" but bro calls everyone that đ I believe he would like you to be different. Darling is something that still sounds like him but also has a greater meaning (you).
"I'm almost finishing this track. Would you like to listen to it darling?"
Felix
Calls you "angel". He thinks it's only fair that he portrays you well, and no other word could do you justice. Besides that, I think he would also call you a nickname, a variant from your own name that no one has ever called you before. Nothing else could be more you than that, but it's also something that would be exclusive to the two of you.
"Angel, my mom is on the phone. She said she misses you."
Seungmin
"Honey". It's just so sweet and light, so he thinks that it matches you very well. I don't think he would be the type to say petnames all the time but when it does happen, it's always the cutest things that leave his mouth.
"Honey, I'm on my way home. Do you want me to bring dinner?"
I.N
He's another one who I think would call you a Korean pet name, but for different reasons than Lee Know. It's probably because Korean is his mother language, so it feels more like home. And at this point, you are his home.
"Jagi have you seen my silver ring? The big one?"
Masterlist | you'll probably like: first relationships with skz
Dividers by @saradika-graphics
Taglist: @yuyubeans
Reblogs and feedback are always appreciated <3
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