#form vs function

[vexwerewolf]

If we talk about the aesthetics of technology in Lancer, we can divide each of the Big 4 along lines of form and function.

IPS-N: Pure Function

IPS-N cares only what a mech does. It doesn't need to look good or pretty doing it - it only needs to be able to do that thing well. It's notable that the Raleigh, arguably the most form-oriented of the IPS-N frames, is also considered to be the company's biggest commercial failure - they strayed from their core design principles and got punished for it.

Harrison Armory: Form Follows Function

Harrison Armory still leans pretty heavily towards the functionality side of things, but it isn't satisfied with doing a good job alone. Yes, the mechs have to perform well, but they also have to look good doing it. There's no practical application for the Sherman's sleeveless coat or the Tokugawa's dainty little tassels, but they don't hinder combat functionality and they make the mechs look dashing. In comparison to IPS-N's coarse, industrial, almost unfinished look, HA mechs look stern, austere and imposing. There's a smoothness to them that you just don't get on IPS-N frames.

SSC: Function Follows Form

SSC is where we start to plunge into aesthetics-forward mech design. The Death's Head isn't six-legged because it's a sniper - the Death's Head is a sniper because it's six-legged. SSC came up with a mech design and asked: "what would this do best?" A six-legged chassis provided a more stable firing platform for precision weaponry, so that was what it did. Shapes and appearances are invented, and then a use case is discovered for them.

HORUS: Pure Form

It might seem weird to classify HORUS as "pure form" when their mechs largely don't have a consistent visual identity outside of the examples in the book. However, if we look a little deeper at the definition of "form," the explanation becomes clear: in some ways, HORUS is in the business of making statements, not mechs.

For anyone who's actually played a HORUS mech in Lancer, you may have noticed how awkward they are to actually pilot. Their statlines are, on paper, often very poorly suited to the sort of work they have to do. The Gorgon is built to attract attention and draw fire but has no armor. The Manticore is meant to be a front-line fighter but is quite slow. The Minotaur is meant to be a tech platform but has a low sensor range. The Pegasus' one functional trait doesn't apply to any of the weapons in its equipment package!

This is because HORUS mechs are designed purely as a testament to a certain discipline of technology. I remember expressing irritation with a friend's NeoGeo-for-X-Box emulator once, that you couldn't reconfigure the controller mapping so that it was easier to play with the X-Box controller. He remarked that it was meant as a historical preservation tool that perfectly duplicated the functionality of the NeoGeo, and that the only reason you could even play games using it at all is because that was a function of NeoGeo arcade cabinets.

That's how HORUS mechs are - their usability as chassis is broadly a side-effect.

[spamuelsonofspamothy]

A form vs function chart of turrets in Helldivers 2. Discuss.

[mysteroads]

(If anyone knows who did this original infographic, would love to know)

Getting a bit sick of all the "ooh I'm so glad Laios has a soft body!" "Laios is built like an average guy" style posts. Because he doesn't and isn't.

Laios is built like a fucking professional wrestler. He isn't like, super chiseled or anything but he does not have an "average" body, he his built like someone who does a LOT of physical effort and training.

[kindnessoverperfection]

i've been working hard on NPD recovery for a little over three years. the other day i was breaking down hard over "i've been doing everything right, but i still feel terrible and idk how to change my emotions"

but this past week, i feel like i've really taken a big step forward? by just... acknowledging and working with my emotions?

if i heard myself say that a week ago, i'd feel frustrated. because "yeah i know, i've been admitting it for like a year now. i feel like shit, i have an underlying fear of intimacy, my symptoms are due to trauma. i know. i've been trying to address those things but nothing is working!"

i feel like the shift came from

a) acknowledging that I have RSD and anxiety (both of which I kept adamantly denying I have)

and b) being mindful of those feelings and thoughts as they come up in the moment, and reacting to them in healthier ways (which I couldn't do before because I denied them entirely, so I wasn't aware of how I was reacting unhealthily)

And these past three years of work are probably making it a lot easier to move forward, make progress, and remain relatively stable throughout the process of doing this. So... @ myself, it felt like it wasn't doing anything, but you were building a foundation.

[andreweverding]

celebrating gabe’s birthday by dressing full sceneslut and introducing philosophical ideas in class

[thehardkandy]

got all my stuff done for class today. definitely spent a lot of time getting it all finished this weekend, but the upside is that i dont really have anything to worry or crunch about tomorrow

it was a productive learning experience since at work ive been doing a lot of stuff focused on the DB and forms aspect of things, and for this class site i focused more on state/interactivity throughout the page so that im comfier with alpine and the general life cycle of things. makes me aware of various limitations im gonna have to work around, but i do think it should be OK

plan for monday is that if all the migrations and seeders i wrote on friday work as i hope (and they did seem ready to go at that point) then im going to see about making the first bespoke form, cause while the out-of-the-box stuff we have is solid, there's just a whole heck of a lot of information density i need

i do wanna experience a tiny bit with using the out-of-the-box approach, but only to see kinda where it stops working. just too information dense with too many connected models

that latter point is probably also something i should keep in mind before i fully commit to my migrations, but idk. i still feel like ive made the right choice. but im going to keept he option open to humour the more... naive approach if it seems necessary, cause i think it's much more important to have the data be easy to work with than like.t he absolute most pure abstract representation of the stuff

[ssun-showerss]

the REALEST

Anyway speaking of poly trios. Have any of you considered Lawlusan because MANNNN.

[comicaurora]

Do you think ethics are just an attempt at being a healthier form of selfish?

In one of your Detail Diatribes where Batman confronts Catwoman and tries to stop her from killing Falcone, you highlighted the fact that his reasoning was not to protect her father, but to try and save her. Ever since, some very strange ideas about the nature of selfishness and selflessness have been rattling around my head.

It only started coming into focus when I tried to put into words why it was a bad thing that D-16 killed Sentinel Prime. My best answer right now is because it made D-16 into Megatron. Orion wasn't trying to save Sentinel, he was trying to protect the cybertronian people. Maybe if Orion focused more on saving D-16, they wouldn't have lost their friendship and all of Cybertron would be better for it. Of course, in the end, Megatron was the deciding factor in making himself, caring more about his pride than his current identity, but this highlights a strange selfish quirk in sustainable selfless behavior.

If you are purely selfless you suffer from spending more of yourself than you have to give. If you're too selfish you can't maintain the human connections that are a requirement for being a complete and healthy person. It leaves the best options as being selfless to make your environment an easier one for you to live in. Where your actions for others are repaid by the selflessness from your community. Or, being selfish with your charity. Taking care of what you care about because their well being positively contributes to your own.

To be fair, the opening sentence now looks like an incomplete thought. It probably should be asking if you think ethics is just an attempt at being a more healthy form of selfish and selfless. Really, just asking if ethics is meant to make you better at being a person, which seems like a question that can answer itself. Still, it feels like an important insight to highlight that to be ethical isn’t about how much of your own life you're willing to sacrifice. It's hard to be a good person when you're not a person anymore.

This is a fascinatingly deep question, and I'm very tickled that our two touchpoints in it are a transforming robot tank and Batman.

My personal opinion is that ethics and morals are not reflections of some universal truth of Justice and Goodness, as they are often framed, but are instead best-practice guidelines on how to function in the big, messy world without causing undue suffering to yourself and others. A facet of this is determining, case by case, how much you need to prioritize yourself vs how much you can afford to help others - in the framing you've proposed, selfishness vs selflessness.

Taking the specific examples we're focusing on - two cases where someone attempts to prevent a revenge killing for the benefit, not of the victim, but of the avenger - I think they reflect this worldview, that the killing is not seen as some innately universally-judged evil act that must be prevented for its own sake, but that the act of killing will harm the killer in a way the person trying to stop them doesn't want to see.

For Catwoman, committing premeditated murder wouldn't solve any of her problems in any way that arresting Falcone and having him legally unraveled would. It'd just park a first degree murder charge on someone who'd up til this point only dealt with petty larceny, and it would potentially weigh her down with misery and regret as she grappled with the trauma of taking a life.

For Megatron, killing Sentinel Prime wasn't a bad action because he deserved to live. They just spent that whole fight scene tearing through enemies. They're warriors on track to spend the next four million years killing each other; the whole "taking a life" ship has already sailed. The problem is that Sentinel is a symbol and a structural part of the political narrative in the founding of the next stage of Cybertron's society. If the first thing the new regime does is bloodily avenge itself on the face of the old regime for the personal wrongs it did them, that proves that the only thing they care about is personal satisfaction of their individual desires - just like Sentinel. Meet the new boss, same as the old boss. If they can instead take a step back, think of the good of Cybertron as a whole, enforce a rule of law and a fair system of justice that applies equally to everyone, even on someone they personally loathe, that would signify integrity and credibility and the hallmark of wise, just and fair leadership capable of setting aside personal feelings for the greater good. It's not about Sentinel; it's about whether the satisfaction of killing him is worth the price of enforcing forever that personal vendettas are more important than the well-being of the people of Cybertron. Which makes it really obvious which one Megatron is going to pick.

My hottest take, and I mean this very genuinely, is that most of the human perception of what constitutes goodness and justice is one thousand percent based on vibes, and is extremely susceptible to narrative reframing. We see an unsympathetic victim (Sentinel Prime, Falcone) who has gleefully caused suffering to innocent people (so judged because they are framed sympathetically, not because we've actually enumerated their lifelong actions to determine they've never done anything wrong) and we feel (feel) that it would be right and just for them to suffer consequences (emphasis on suffer) because that would balance the scales on this vibes equation and that would make us feel like justice had been served. Would this suffering lead to any material good? Not inherently. Would it heal the victims? Not usually. Would it remove the source of the problem? Categorically not, what with how negative reinforcement works (or rather does not work.) It also wouldn't do anything about the other people empowered by the same system to be just as shitty in just as many ways that just happen to be offscreen from our POV. But it feels fair. So what is justice, if it reduces down to "I want them to hurt for the hurt they've caused me"? If it can be sated with a spectacle or distracted by a long nap and a good joke to let the feeling fade? What purpose does this justice serve if it is devoted wholly to the satiation of a bone-deep chordate-brain hunger for Retributive Violence rather than towards actually ensuring that the lives of those harmed are healed and supported and built up again after being broken down? (This is the entire core character arc in The Batman, btw, I'm not just monologuing for no reason here. He calls himself Vengeance for a reason, and the reason is he's doing Batman wrong)

That feeling - that white-hot burning core of Righteous Fury - is the unexamined heart of many systems of morality that focus, not on doing good, but on exacting satisfying retribution on Bad People Who Deserve It, categorized as People Who I Can Hurt Without Feeling Bad Myself. It's a very tempting concept for people who have suffered at others' hands. That feeling, that powerful instinctual understanding of "that's unfair," is incredibly strong. In my opinion, most systems of ethics are built, not around relitigating what is Good and what is Bad per se, but in trying to shape and curb that bone-deep, unbelievably powerful desire to rend the flesh from the bones of your tormenters.

But I mentioned that feeling is susceptible to narrative reframing. This is, as I understand it, a huge part of lawyering. Tell the story of what happened using true events and adding no falsehoods, but highlight the parts that make it feel like your client is the one who is being treated unfairly. They're not an unsympathetic wrongdoer who you can punish without personal moral stain - they're a loving spouse, a parent of three adorable children, they have a really cute puppy, they donate to charity, they're a wonderful conversationalist, a kind friend, etc etc. All those things can also be true of people who do terrible things, but thinking about them defuses that White Hot Core by making us sympathize with the sympathetic parts of them.

This is incredibly well-understood in fiction. It's the whole reason the tropes Kick The Dog and Pet The Dog exist. When you want the audience to root for a character's destruction, leave aside any of their potential quiet moments of sympathy - their tragic backstory, their cute pet, their adorable relationship with their mom - and instead show them going out of their way to commit some minor act of petty cruelty, say Kicking The Dog. The audience will infer that this badness is 24/7 and they have no reason to curb their enthusiasm for Righteous Vengeance. But if the writer wants the audience to see a spark of good in them, to sympathize, to believe they can be redeemed, they'll highlight one of those small moments of charming kindness, and allow them to Pet The Dog instead.

Neither of these acts, in the grand scale, have any bearing on the morality of this person's actions. A pet dog doesn't counterbalance a razed village; a kicked dog doesn't negate a generous contribution to the local soup kitchen. Goodness and badness is not a linear scale added or subtracted to by opposing deeds. BUT showing them to an audience reframes them narratively, and THAT is what shapes the judgment of the White Hot Burning Core. In the space of fiction, this form of bottom-shelf emotional manipulation is one of the cleanest ways to get the audience to root for the messy destruction of what is ostensibly, in the universe of the fiction, a wholly complex and living person who definitely has reasons for everything they've done, even ones that could be framed sympathetically when shown.

Meanwhile, in the real world, ethics are an attempt to judge what is best in a given situation without trusting the White Hot Burning Core to make the call, no matter how compelling "but it would feel really good though" might seem. They try to give someone perspective, context, other priorities to consider. The White Hot Burning Core might want you to rip someone's arms off for driving slow when you've got important places to be, but Ethics can present a number of compelling reasons not to do that - even if it's just "ripping their arms off will definitely make me even more late." And yes, this can be a balance of Selfishness Vs Selflessness. You are one of the people whose wellbeing ethics is designed to make you prioritize improving even if it feels weird, and when all other things are equal, your own health and happiness can be the deciding factor. In a world with an overarching Moral Force that weighs the goodness of your soul by sifting through every grain of action and intent seeking negativity to punish you for, absolute selflessness to the point of self destruction would still probably be seen as Morally Wrong, simply because the universe is a better place with you in it trying your best.

Anyway, if doing the right thing was simple, easy and painless, we probably wouldn't have so many thousands of years of arguing about what it looks like. Good luck out there everybody 👍

[susiephone]

one thing i really love about extraordinary attorney woo is how young-woo doesn't fall into the neat little binary of what we think of as "high-functioning" or "low-functioning" autism (i.e., "autism you don't notice" vs. "autism you do notice", as it's often portrayed), because irl it's rarely that simple. young-woo is highly intelligent, can hold down a job and take care of herself, and overall holds her own - but she also can't "pass" for neurotypical, nor does she want to! she openly stims and has little rituals to help her avoid overstimulation. sometimes she gets overwhelmed in public and has to deal with it. she needs accommodations to manage in day-to-day life, and sometimes has to contend with people who don't understand why she needs them. she needs a support network like anyone else, which she fortunately has in the form of her father and closest friends, and she and her dad occasionally butt heads because he genuinely wants to help, but sometimes oversteps - because her disability is something he still doesn't 100% understand. but he does 100% support her and she knows she can always rely on him. when she was growing up, they sometimes had trouble connecting, but once he learned how to meet her where she was at, they established a bond that made young-woo feel loved and supported, even when her teachers weren't helping her.

i also love how young-woo is very up-front about her autism, and the ways it impacts her life, both for the better and in ways it makes life harder. one of my favorite moments is when another character (who's also coded as autistic) notices one of her rituals (pausing to inwardly count to "three" before stepping into an unfamiliar room) and tells her that he thinks it's awesome that she's self-assured enough to do what she needs to do to accommodate herself, even if other people think it's weird.

like it's not 100% perfect representation - i'm not sure what that would even look like - but i love how, along with the "case of the week" format, so much of the story is about young-woo navigating the world as a young autistic woman, both with her career and her personal life, and what a layered character she is. the fact that she's autistic doesn't feel like a gimmick or like a token effort at diversity; it's a big part of the story and her character arc, but it's not her entire personality, either.

[gunsandspaceships]

The elephant in the room of Spider-Man: Homecoming

It's understandable that in a system as huge as the MCU, it's very difficult not to make mistakes in the sequence of events. I've already touched on some relatively minor issues in my timelines (like Fury's eye in Winter Soldier vs. Captain Marvel, or when Barnes fell off the train). These things are really small and hard to notice unless you're watching these movies under a microscope. They can also be fixed with CGI magic (yes, Marvel, you can do that right now).

There was even a whole "Fury's Big Week" disaster, but that too can be fixed by throwing the whole idea in the trash.

But there is one mistake that is not easy to correct, because this is the entire beginning of the film.

I'm talking about that scene in the car with Peter and Tony.

Don't throw rotten tomatoes at me, guys, nothing personal, but that scene just couldn't happen. At least not in the same universe with the Civil War we were shown.

Why? This is what happened in Civil War:

Wanda injures Tony's left arm. After the airport battle, he wears a sling when he's not in armor. A month after the whole Civil War thing, his arm still shakes.

Peter gets punched in the right eye (to match his mentor, I guess) and also appears to have some rib damage. Tony sends him home right there on the battle(air)field.

Peter resists at first, but apparently feeling pain in his ribs, he agrees with Tony's conclusions.

A minute later, Rhodey falls from the sky, and Rogers escapes to Siberia with Barnes on the Avengers' jet. From then on, Tony has no time for Peter.

At that time, the only person who could pick him up and fly with him first to Berlin and then home was Happy. Alone.

About 15 hours later, Peter was delivered to his apartment in Queens with a black eye starting to form and Tony's web shooter still on his wrist (thus the entire suit was with him).

Tony went with Rhodey to the hospital, then to the Raft, and from there straight to the bunker in Siberia. There were ~13 hours between the battle at the airport and the fight in the bunker. Tony spent most of that time flying to those places and couldn't be in two places at once.

He suffered more injuries during the fight in the bunker, apparently including head and chest injuries, and it is unknown when he returned to the States or in what condition. The most realistic guess would be that he spent some time in the hospital, probably sharing a room with Rhodey and Secretary Ross, who was having another heart attack at the time. Just kidding about the room, but the rest is true.

Either way, Tony's mental state would be terrible. And it's still bad a month later, in this scene:

What happened according to Spider-Man: Homecoming:

Neither Peter nor Happy cared what happened to Rhodey or where the hell Tony was:

Tony accompanies Peter as Happy drives him home. Tony's left arm is fully functional and he doesn't wear a sling.

His mental state is fine: he smiles, jokes, his eyes glow, etc.

Peter has no injuries either. No black eye, no pain, no bruised ribs.

Seems like NOTHING bad happened.

Some argue that this scene took place after Siberia to get around the time conflict between the airport battle and the bunker/return to Queens. This idea makes even less sense. It directly contradicts the Civil War post-credits scene, and also does not take into account the fact that all of the above still remains for at least another month, plus additional wounds were added to Tony, including cuts on his face that are clearly visible in CW and are absent in Homecoming.

This whole scene is simply incompatible with Civil War. Period. The elephant stays in the room and I don't know how to get it out.

[marinecorvid]

like when i was younger i didnt care about my furniture too much. unsure if in a "i'm a kid and i don't give a shit about this, like brushing my teeth" way or a "i actually do have feelings about this but im too emotionally repressed to realize they exist or meaningfully acknowledge them" way. probably a little bit of both

and then leading up to and during The Move there was sooo much shit to move and so much god damn furniture bc my mother loves furniture and there was too much furniture in our house i finally decided to settle on the more minimalism end of the "materialism/minimalism" bc i hated it so much. we have surpassed the need for Stuff

but now also that im not living with her anymore and i can choose to do things and have preferences that don't align with hers without her getting in a twist about it i want to start figuring out how a place inhabited by zed would look, and how to balance that out with attempting to be utilitarian. like all my furniture is currently very barebones in terms of appearance and i don't mind it for some stuff. but i saw a post about someone longing for a no-longer-sold ikea bedframe that looked kinda cool and something clicked in my brain

getting an ikea craving. who wants to go to ikea with me

[dckweed]

tiktok made me do it!gf vs tf141 bf

hey friends :) it would be much appreciated if you helped me earn some extra money, without even giving me any of your own (you could even sign up and earn some yourself!) by clicking this link!

booktok has gotten to you again, in the worst way and moment possible and you'll NEVER live it down..but really? it was ALL his fault!!

Your boyfriend had been working out like a man possessed lately.

Shirts off. Arms flexing. Muscles bulging.

Pull-ups. Bicep curls. Push-ups that made his veins pop.

And you?

Yeah. You were barely surviving.

And after one too many minutes of drooling from the sidelines, your brain short-circuited and blurted out the worst/best thing it possibly could:

“I want you to choke me with your bicep.”

And that was when everything went sideways.

Captain Price – "say please.."

You were standing off to the side, pretending to be invested in your phone while Price did pull-up after pull-up, the sleeves of his t-shirt rolled up, sweat beading along his forearms, shoulders rippling under the strain.

The way his biceps bulged…

Yeah. You were not okay.

So, naturally, like the well-behaved menace you are, you whispered under your breath—

“I want you to choke me with your bicep.”

Except.

You didn’t whisper.

You thought you did. But you did not.

Because Price froze mid-pull-up.

Dropped. Landed. Turned slowly.

Eyebrow raised. Smirk forming.

"Come again, sweetheart?"

You felt your soul leave your body.

"I—I didn’t mean to say that out loud—"

"You said it loud enough." He walks toward you, rolling his shoulder, every step deliberate. "You alright, love? Should I be concerned? Should I call someone?"

You squeak. "No—I'm good. Super healthy. Mentally sound."

"Choke you with my bicep, yeah?" he asks, smiling like the devil, flexing just slightly.

You physically fold. Your knees buckle, your body goes hot, your face full nuclear red.

"Oh my god—"

Price leans in, voice low and amused. "Say please."

(You do. Eventually. Wheezing through the embarrassment.)

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick – "nothing, mind your business!"

Kyle was doing push-ups. Slow, controlled, brutal.

Every movement made his arms tense and ripple, his tank top damp with sweat, back flexing with every dip.

You were watching from the corner, mouth slightly open, forgetting how to function as a human.

And before your brain could stop your mouth—

“I want you to choke me with your bicep.”

Kyle froze mid-rep.

Dropped.

Sat up.

Turned around like he wasn’t sure he heard you correctly.

"What did you just say to me?"

You’re already sinking into your chair. "Nothing. Mind your business. Go back to sweating."

"No, no, no—" he wipes sweat off his forehead, walking toward you. "You said choke you with my bicep? Are you okay? You good? You need help? A priest maybe?"

You cover your face. "It slipped. My mouth is faster than my brain."

"Apparently so’s your thirst, babe."

He laughs, then flexes his arm slowly—on purpose—grinning when you let out an audible whimper.

"Jesus Christ, you’re folding. You folded."

"I DID NOT—"

"You’re literally sliding off the couch right now."

He wraps that arm around you anyway, giving you the lightest flex, and your entire body turns to jelly.

(You didn’t survive. But you died happy.)

Simon "Ghost" Riley – "the ghost of a slut."

Ghost doing pull-ups?

Illegal.

Arms covered in tattoos, sweat glistening down his neck, and the way his shirt was barely hanging on—

Yeah. You were gone.

So when he dropped from the bar, flexing slightly as he shook out his arms, you made the mistake of letting your mouth speak for your horny little gremlin brain.

“I want you to choke me with your bicep.”

Simon paused.

Looked over his shoulder.

Turned.

Head tilted. Mask up just enough to see the curve of his smirk.

"Sweetheart, you wanna repeat that?"

You shook your head, rapidly. "Nope. Nope. That wasn’t me. That was the ghost of a slut who once lived here."

"Oh, I heard it. You said choke you with my bicep."

He takes a step forward. You take one back.

"You sure you're good, love? Need to call someone? Maybe a cold shower? A therapist?"

"No, I’m fine. Everything is fine."

He steps closer, flexing slightly as he lifts his arm, placing it beside your neck—not even touching yet.

Your entire body flushes hot.

Eyes flutter. Legs wobble.

Simon just grins. "Yeah. That’s what I thought."

(You melted on the spot. He didn’t even need to touch you.)

Johnny "Soap" MacTavish – "Say It Again, I Dare Ye."

Soap had been doing curls, arms slick with sweat, jaw clenched, veins on full display, tank top clinging to everything.

It was honestly a hate crime.

And your poor, broken, barely functioning brain whispered—

“I want you to choke me with your bicep.”

Out loud.

Loudly.

Soap stopped curling.

Eyes narrowed.

"What’d you just say to me, lass?"

You froze. "Nothing. I said nothing. I was talking to the dog."

"We dont BRING the dog."

"Well maybe we SHOULD."

He drops the weights, stalks over, flexing on purpose, that smug Scottish shit-eating grin on full display.

"You wanna say it again, sweetheart?"

You shrivel. You collapse. Your body heat spikes like a malfunctioning computer.

"I blacked out. I don’t know her."

He leans in, places his massive bicep beside your head, and whispers—

"Like this? Is this the way ye meant it?"

You make a pitiful noise.

He laughs so hard he almost cries. "Christ, you folded like fuckin’ origami."

(And then he did, in fact, choke you with his bicep. Carefully. Lovingly. With lots of teasing.)

Moral of the Story:

You should’ve just kept your thoughts to yourself.

But now?

Your boyfriend’s bicep is wrapped around your neck.

And you are no longer functional.

[etherealkissed88]

YOU ARE THE ONE & ONLY INNER SELF 𖥔

WHAT IS INNER SELF?

inner self is you. it is imagination. it is god. it is power. it is reality. it is identity. it is you.

"the one in you that imagines, is you. that is the one who is desiring. that is the one wants to be exalted. that is the one who wants to have their desires fulfilled."

INNER SELF VS THE 3D

you are the inner self. there is only self. since it is always inner self / inner assumptions that gets expressed, there is no 3d. the 3d is always neutral and therefore dead. you are the inner self which is also taking on the role of a human in the '3d'. but since the 3d is always molded by inner self, the 3d is just a form of inner self; it is connected to self (you). the only possible 'thing' that can control this dead 3d world is inner self. as we know already, the inner self molds the dead 3d world so to manifest something, one would have to change self first and as a result, the dead 3d will only follow because that is its only job. the 3d cannot function on its own because it is only a reflection of self since they arent separated.

the human body is not the real you. think of this human body like a costume. the real you is internal (inner self) and it is what is always being expressed in the physical 3d, the part which the human self experiences. self is limitless. as self, you can occupy any state you choose (state of wealth, state of luck, state of dating your sp). there are infinite states, so there are infinite versions of you that you can embody.

everything is an expression of self, an expression of you, an expression of who you are being in imagination

IDENTIFYING W THE INNER SELF

now lets think about the 3d/human self: nelly is in math class and she wants to see a pink elephant right now. so since shes uneducated about the law, she affirms for the pink elephant and then searches for it in the 3d using her human senses. she looks at the board and around the tables to see if she can find the pink elephant. she cant find it. the 3d (even though it is only an expression of self), is always limited. this is simply because the 3d is a limited version of self. at this moment, she is identifying w the 3d, outer self.

afterschool, nelly gets pissed because she still didnt see that pink elephant even though she searched everywhere. she goes home and reads her favorite loa blogger, @/etherealkissed ;) and is now educated on the law *wink wink* now she knows that she is only ever self which is limited by the 3d. she sees how limitless and free her inner self is, so she decides to identify w inner self.

now she identifies as inner self and sees the pink elephant. instead of searching for it in the 3d, she imagines the pink elephant and instantly sees it. she (her inner self) instantly experiences it in imagination. her inner self embodies the state of having the pink elephant. since she understands that self is always what is expressed, she knows that by law, the 3d will reflect self and she will see the pink elephant in the physical since her inner self already experienced it. but she isnt searching anymore because she knows it is done already. she (her inner self) continues being that person with the pink elephant in imagination, regardless of the physical. she no longer identifies w the unreal outer self by searching for it or wondering when she will see the pink elephant. later that day, her mom comes home with a cute pink elephant plushy as a surprise gift. “shit, inner self really is all there is,” nelly thinks. now she knows without doubt that inner self is always being expressed!

the point is that she learned she cannot be limited by the 3d since she is always limitless inner self. she is comfortable with knowing she is always inner self and always experiencing inner self.

“To the Inner Man EVERYTHING ALREADY IS TRUE, not to the outer. IT ALREADY IS SO, to the Inner Man. There is no convincing necessary, no 1,000 affirmations, no repeating over and over hoping it works, IF YOU IDENTIFY YOURSELF WITH THE INNER MAN. If you claim to be the One Within, you will find it incredibly easy, I will say natural, to FEEL what you want. Pay attention to what I am saying: When you imagine your "end" is it not ALREADY SO? You did not imagine "How" to get there, you are already there in imagination. Your issue is NOT in imagining the end, your issue lies in who you are identifying yourself with. If you imagine yourself in the end, which is easy, but then you identify yourself with the outer-man, you will breed nothing but frustrations. However, if you first identify yourself with the One Within, and then imagine your end, you will not question if you "are going to get it," you HAVE IT! The Inner Man always has it. He see's the end, he is the one who creates his own fate. The Inner Man is his own destroyer and redeemer. Identify yourself with the inner man. The immortal you. Not this body nor this outer-life. If you want freedom, love, joy, happiness, confidence. If you want to be a King/Queen, treated like a god/goddess, loved beyond your wildest dreams, then identify yourself with the INNER MAN. The Inner Man can have all those desires fulfilled.”

to the outer/human self, you have to convince it, search for it. to the inner self, you only have to be it, imagine it, assume it.

“Let's give an example. Suppose I wanted to go to Las Vegas but I am in New York. While I am in New York, I would imagine myself in Las Vegas at the MGM Grand lobby. So while I am looking around in the MGM Grand's lobby, I assume that the Inner Man who is looking around is the REAL ME, the I AM. So I say, "I AM in Las Vegas." If I identify myself with the Inner Man, then yes, it is a PRESENT FACT that I am in Las Vegas. To deny this is to be delusional. I am looking at the lobby and I see people walking around. Of course, I am here.” - edward art

the inner self is all there is. the inner self is the true you. the 3d/human self is a limited expression of self. why limit yourself to the neutral and limited world?

kisses, jani ☆

[saiyanprincessswanie]

The Ultimate Risk - Part 2

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Word Count: 5020

Series Summary: Reader is a full-time college student at 30 years old who is starting over in life. When she loses her full-time job as a waitress, CEO James “Bucky” Barnes steps in with a proposition. Can he sell you on a way to help you by offering a Sugar Daddy relationship? In time who will get feelings first? Can a Sugar Daddy relationship really work out?

Series Warnings: Sugar Daddy au, Reader is 30 & Bucky is in his 40s, trust issues, angst, eventually falling in love, smut, oral (m & f).

The Ultimate Risk Masterlist

A/N: @avengers-assemble-bingo for James Buchanan Barnes - 108th Birthday Bingo

Square: Sugar Daddy (card #4B 024)

A/N 2: Thanks to my beta readers @gremlin-girly & @lfnr-blog-blog-blog Thank you to @nekoannie-chan for reading this. Thank you to @late-to-the-party-81 for my amazing moodboard.

Please Read, Reblog, & Comment. It lets me know you like my work. 😊💜

I do NOT consent to translating or reposting my work on any social media platform, app, or third-party site or run through AI. If you see my work anywhere besides my personal Tumblr & AO3 accounts, it has been stolen.

For three days now you have been contemplating Bucky’s offer. You had researched what a sugar daddy relationship was and it explained to you further what you were getting into. You could be a companion to him, attend his work functions and, in return, he would take care of you financially. There were no strings attached, or so he said, to this deal. You looked at your pro vs con list for the millionth time. 

Pro: well-mannered, benevolent, charming, intelligent, protective, caring and handsome. Rent and bills paid. Student loans paid off. Get to work full-time on college classes. Financially stable. Less stress.

Cons: could or should you trust him? What if wants his money back if you break off your sugar daddy relationship? Short-tempered. Can/will resort to violence. Look at what happened with John. What if he wants more than companionship? 

Okay, so your pros were definitely longer than the cons. Plus, you knew Bucky from all the times you waited on him in the restaurant. But was that enough? You were still wary about your decision. He seemed like all the attributes that you listed in the pro section just from your interactions with him over the last 6 months at Cecily’s restaurant, he seemed genuine. However, you'd thought the same about John.  But Bucky seemed entirely different. The things you'd listed in your pros list had been observational and not always directed at you.

UGH

It all came down to trust. John had ruined that for you when he up and left you without a reason. Maybe it was because you were finally putting yourself first and John wanted to be the center of attention. You sigh again.

“Fuck John.” 

This wasn’t about your ex, it was about you getting what you want out of life and starting over. You look at your phone and decide to text Bucky - mind made up.

You: “Hey Bucky I think I made up my mind. When can we talk?”

Bucky: “Hey sweetheart I was planning on leaving soon. We can meet at a coffee shop not far from your place. I heard they’re good.”

You knew the place he was talking about. You liked to go there sometimes in the mornings because the coffee was great but their muffins were even better. It was a five-minute walk and was nice outside.

You: “That sounds great. I will meet you there in a little while.”

Bucky: I can’t wait. See you soon.

You couldn’t help the smile that formed on your face. Someone is looking forward to your company and that just made your day better. You got off your bed and headed to your small closet, looking inside for an outfit your eyes fell on a pretty light green sundress with white flowers on it. You pulled it out of the closet and quickly changed into it. Giving yourself a once over in the mirror you notice how nice the dress looked on you. You put on light makeup and styled your hair. You slip on your white sandals to finish the outfit. Then you grab your phone, keys, and purse as you leave your apartment.

The sun was shining brightly as you walked down the sidewalk. Your stomach was in knots as you got closer to the coffee shop. How would he react to your answer and could you handle what came next? You thought you were going to beat Bucky to the shop when you rounded the corner and saw his Cadillac Escalade at the curb. Walking up to the door of the coffee shop you were greeted by Bucky who came outside and held the door open for you. He was still in a suit, but no tie, and the top two buttons on his shirt were undone.

“Hi sweetheart, so glad that you made it. I just got here a couple of minutes ago. I got us a table in the corner so we could have some privacy.”

“Hi, Bucky, nice to see you too.” 

You start to fidget with your hands and look down at your feet for a second. Then, taking a breath you look up into his blue eyes and smile at him. You were trying to ground yourself; anxiety taking hold in your bones. It wasn't working. However, the moment he took your hand and smiled at you there was a sense of relief that washed over you. Like everything was going to be okay. 

Bucky leads the way to the table and releases your hand so he can pull your chair out for you to sit in. Once you sit, Bucky takes a seat across from you and smiles. A waitress comes over to bring two cups of coffee with a side of milk and sugar. As she walks away, you make your coffee as you like it.

“Do you need any sugar or milk? I can share.”

He shakes his head no. “I’m fine sweetheart. I like my coffee black no sugar or milk for me.”

You take a sip of your coffee and hum in appreciation. The coffee was always good here. Putting the cup down you looked at Bucky who was smirking at you. It was like he already knew the answer you were going to give him.

“So, I bet you want to know my answer to your sugar daddy offer.” You give him a shy smile as you fidget with your cup.

“Whatever it is sweetheart, I will respect your decision. I won’t be mad if that’s what you’re worried about.” Bucky eyed your fidgeting hands and, sensing your nervousness, reached across the table to lightly but soothingly rub the back of your hand.

Taking a deep breath you decide to give him your answer. “I’ve decided I would like to try out this arrangement. 

Bucky breaks into an involuntary smile, quickly scuppered when you narrow your eyes slightly and continue.

"But if - and only IF - you agree to put it in writing."

"That's fair." Bucky nods solemnly. "I planned on doing exactly that but if I can ask... why don't you also tell me what you're worried about? Communication is an important aspect to all of my contracts and I expect you to be able to tell me if there's anything you're unhappy with."

“I’m worried about the violent side you had with John. Is that something I have to worry about with you? I wouldn’t be able to stay with you if you could potentially harm me. Plus I have trust issues thanks to John as well so I’m a little anxious about fully trusting you. I’m also worried about being pressured into a sexual relationship. I’m not sure I’m ready for that.” 

His eyebrows rose at your concerns as he tried to take it in. Bucky knew you had anxiety and trust issues so he would have to learn how to show you he wasn’t a bad guy.

“I will do everything in my power to show you that you can trust me. I will earn that from you eventually and hopefully, you will see I’m genuine. As for the money, if for whatever reason we don’t work out I don’t want anything back from you. It will be in the contract stating so.” 

Bucky’s blue eyes maintain eye contact with you the entire time he speaks. Bucky looks at you with reassuring eyes as his hand gives you a comforting squeeze and he offers a genuine smile. 

“As for my behavior with John I promise you that was a rare occasion. I’m not a violent man and my mother raised me to never hurt a woman. I assure you, I have standards. Lastly, we touched base on this before. We don’t have to do anything you aren’t comfortable with. Right now I’m looking for friendship and companionship only. I hope this sets your mind at ease.”

You grin back at him. This was exactly what you needed to hear. “Thank you, Bucky for going over my concerns. I feel comfortable knowing this will all be highlighted in a contract. Trust for me must be earned and if you ever break it I will not be able to trust you again.”

Bucky grinned at you. “I don’t plan on breaking your trust. I will do whatever I can to build it between us instead. Are there any other concerns or questions you have?”

“No, I think we covered it all. Thank you, Bucky for hearing my concerns and not judging me.” You took another drink of your coffee. 

“Any time sweetheart. So, do you have any plans for tomorrow? ‘Cause I was thinking we could go shopping for some formal dresses and clothes? My treat.” Bucky watches as your face lights up in excitement. He hopes to always bring that response out of you.

“Oh my gosh really? That sounds wonderful. I’m free tomorrow.” 

You couldn’t contain your excitement and Bucky could only smile back at you. He knew he made the right choice in choosing you to be by his side. This was the start of something special, he could feel it.

The two of you continued to talk about the agreement. He went over what was expected at events like being well-mannered and considerate. Which he already knew you would be. Bucky would keep you by his side at all events, outings, and travels until you felt comfortable enough to be on your own. 

You asked questions about his lifestyle and he had answers for you. According to Bucky, he was a self-made billionaire who could happily retire tomorrow if he wanted to. It just depended on some personal things that he didn’t go into. But he did talk about lavish vacations and restaurants that he liked. He assured you that he would spoil you with them soon enough. 

Bucky in return asked about your life. You skirted quickly over what happened with John and a wedding that never happened; that left you in financial ruin and with a whole lot of trust issues. You decided that you wanted to go back to college to get a degree in your dream job. How you wanted to eventually pay your bills without struggling or stressing out. By the time you were done talking, it was already dinner time.

“Wow, I’m so sorry I talked so much. I guess when I’m warmed up to someone it’s easier to talk about myself. So, I bet you have somewhere to be.” You bit your lower lip to stop yourself from fidgeting again.

“Sweetheart, I have nowhere to be and I’m enjoying your company.” Bucky winked at you as he smirked.

“Well, if you aren’t busy and are free you could come to my place to order food. It’s not the fanciest place but to me it’s cozy.” 

What were you thinking no billionaire would want to come to your dump of an apartment? What a dumb idea…

“Sure, that sounds like fun sweetheart. Let me drive us over to your apartment and we can go from there. Whatever you want to eat I’m good with.”

Bucky got up and tossed some money on the table. He gestured for you to go first but when you reached the door he held it open for you again. Even when you got to his Escalade Bucky opened the door and once you were inside he shut it. You could get used to that. John never did anything like this with you.

Bucky got on the driver's side and drove the short distance to your apartment. Once parked, you both got out and you led him to your apartment building. Heading up the stairs you finally reach your door. Taking a breath you open your door and walk in followed by Bucky.

“It’s not much but I call it home.” 

Bucky looked around your apartment and grinned. “I like it. This is a cute little place.” Looking at the paintings on the wall he had to admit they were beautiful.

“Did you paint these yourself?” He asked.

Kicking off your sandals you looked at him studying one of the colorful abstract ones.  “Yeah, that’s all me. I used to paint all the time but once I moved here I didn’t have the space for it. It’s one of my favorite hobbies.”

“Remarkable. You are truly gifted. Have you ever thought about selling any of them? With this talent I’m sure you would have buyers, myself included.” He stood with his hands on his hips and head cocked to the side looking at each painting on the walls.

You chuckle a little as you watch him. “I’ve thought about it but again I don’t have the time, money, or space.”

Bucky turned around to look at you. “Consider it done. I will find you space to paint and with me, you’ll have money to invest in this. Plus, besides college, you will have free time to express yourself on canvas. What do you say?”

You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. Finally, you could have free time to do what you love. “I say let’s do it.” You start to giggle again and this time Bucky picks you up and spins you in a circle.

Bucky places you back on your feet and at that moment his stomach growls. “So how about dinner?”

“Is pizza okay? I know a great brick oven pizza place that delivers.”

“Sounds good to me, doll.” Bucky takes his jacket off and places it on the back of a chair. Rolling his sleeves up to his elbows he reveals tattoos on both his arms. 

You swore your panties got wet from just the sight. No, you can’t feel this way about him. You were his friend and companion. Clearing your throat you grab your phone and place an order for a pepperoni pizza. When you hang up you call over to Bucky who is still staring at your paintings. 

“Hey if it’s okay with you I’m going to change.” 

“That’s fine, doll.”

You went to your room and changed into shorts and a T-shirt. As you come out you find Bucky taking a picture of one of your paintings. 

“Whatcha doing Bucky?” You watch as he turns around with a grin on his face. 

“I wanted to text this to an art dealer I know. He’s my best friend - Steve - who was with me a few nights ago at your restaurant. I wanted to see what he thought of your work.”

You were surprised at the interest he had in your work. Things like this just don’t happen to you. A sugar daddy does spoil his girl though. 

"How did you start painting?" "What inspired you?" Bucky asked and that brought a smile to your face.

“I’ve been painting almost all my life. I didn’t take it seriously until I was a preteen. Then my parents enrolled me in art classes outside of school where I could hone my painting.”

You continued to take for another twenty minutes before you both heard a knock, knock! “Pizza is here.”

Bucky goes to answer it and it’s the delivery guy. Bucky pays him and gives him a nice tip before closing the door. He places the box on your counter as you grab plates. You each grab what you want and head to the couch to watch TV. With the TV on as background noise, you both continue to talk again. 

You both talk for hours about anything and everything. Before you know it it’s eleven at night. You both are laughing on the couch over a story he told you. 

Bucky looks at his watch and frowns. “I’m sorry I’ve kept you up late. I’ve had a wonderful time.”

You give a small yawn and nod. “I’ve had a great time with you tonight. We should do this again.”

Bucky stands and stretches. “We will definitely do this again. For now, I should let you sleep ‘cause tomorrow we are going shopping.”

You squeal a little in your excitement and stand up to hug him. “I can’t wait, Bucky. Thank you for today.” 

Bucky was shocked that you hugged him but he smiled anyway. Walking to the chair he takes his jacket and grabs his keys out of the pocket. “You sleep well for me tonight.”

He kisses the crown of your head then turns around and leaves. You both wave at each other before you close and lock your door.

If this is how a sugar daddy relationship works you could get used to it. Putting up the leftover pizza in the refrigerator you head to your room and climb into bed. Tomorrow is a new day and you can’t wait to see where he takes you.

The alarm on your phone went off at nine in the morning. You finally had a good night's rest thanks to Bucky stopping by last night. It was nice to spend time with someone and talk so much. You let out a groan as you stretched in bed. Getting up, you headed to the bathroom to get ready for the day starting with a hot shower. When you were done in the shower and finally dressed for the day you texted Bucky.

You: I’m ready whenever you are. 

Bucky: I’m on my way sweetheart.

Twenty minutes later there was knocking at your door. You opened the door to see Bucky standing there with a smile on his face. He was dressed in a red henley shirt, jeans, and boots. Thank goodness he was casually dressed since you were in a lilac shirt, capris, and sneakers.

“You look gorgeous,” Bucky commented.

You smile back at him. “You look handsome as well. I just need to grab my purse and we can leave.” 

You place your phone into your purse and place it on your shoulder. Then you grab the keys and head out the door locking it behind you. You walked in front of Bucky as you made your way down the stairs and outside. It was a beautiful sunny spring day outside as you walked to his Escalade and got inside. Bucky got in and pulled away from the curb.

“So where are we off to first Bucky?” You asked excitedly.

Bucky chuckled at your excitement. “I have a few places in mind. Don’t worry about anything ‘cause today is going to be all about you.” 

You both talked about the type of places you were going. Some were places that focused on dresses for every occasion. While others were everyday clothes. Not that he didn’t like what you wore. He knew you might want to update some of your clothes and shoes. You on the other hand were more worried about where all this new clothing was going to fit since your closet was so small. You told yourself to relax and that you would figure everything out. Bucky pulled up to the first store. Dresses lined the windows and you stared in shock at how beautiful some of them were.

Bucky watched you as you stared at the shop. You had the cutest expression on your face. “Are you ready to go inside, sweetheart?”

“Absolutely, yes!” You squealed out. 

Bucky got out of the Escalade and made his way to your side where he opened the door for you. He offered you his hand as you hopped out. Holding hands felt natural to you as he led you into the store. As you entered you couldn’t believe your eyes; there were dresses EVERYWHERE. A saleswoman appeared out of nowhere and greeted Bucky.

“Ah, Mr. Barnes, we were expecting you. How may I help you?” She asked as she looked between the two of you. 

Bucky introduced you to the saleswoman. “We need some dresses for her. We’re looking for both casual and formal wear. I want to be able to show her off at events in the most stunning dresses you have.” 

“Of course Mr.Barnes. We will have her try only the best dresses on.” She looked at you now and offered a smile. “If you want to follow me, we will get you started.”

The saleswoman and you started walking towards the evening dresses. There were so many colors and designs; pinks and purples, ballgowns and halternecks. The saleswoman asked what your size was and she started grabbing dresses. She brought them to a changing room for you and you walked into the spacious room. Grabbing the first gown it was black with a slit up the side and was off the shoulder. Slipping your clothes off you pull the dress on and call the saleswoman for help to zip you up. Once zipped up you took a breath and stepped out of the dressing room. Walking out to where the mirrors were and Bucky sat, you bit your lip bashfully. 

Bucky's mouth parted when his eyes fixed on you, taking in every inch of your beauty he could. The dress was stunning on you and his hands twitched; desperate to touch you as he watched you do a slow turn in front of the mirror, capturing all angles of yourself. Then when you looked at Bucky he could sense your nervousness so he got up from the chair to walk over to you. He was a foot away from you when he gave you a big smile.

“You look absolutely beautiful, sweetheart. I love this dress on you. The style suits you.” He complimented. 

You offered a shy smile back. “Thank you, Bucky. I do like this one very much. But the price is high for it. I don’t think it would be fair to ask you to get this for me.”

Bucky gently grabbed your hands and kissed the back of each one. “The cost means nothing to me. What matters is if you like it.”

You look up into his blue eyes. “I do. I really do love it.”

“Then it is yours. Now, go model some more dresses for me.” He offered a reassuring smile and watched as you headed back to the dressing room.

The rest of the afternoon was pretty much the same. You would try on a new style and color then show Bucky how you looked in them. He was very supportive and vocal about how stunning you looked to him. By the time you were done, you had seven evening gowns for events and five new casual dresses. Where you would put them you had no idea but Bucky was very happy to pay for them all. From that shop, you bought some casual clothes that were nicer to wear if you had any place to be during the day. Then, you went shoe shopping to match all of your brand-new dresses. When Bucky insisted on you getting some Louis Vuitton shoes and a couple of handbags, you thought you were going to cry. You always wanted a pair of each; and here you were picking them out. Once shopping was over, Bucky had told you that you were heading to his place.

“I have the contract ready for you to sign at my place. I hope you don’t mind doll.” 

You beamed back at him. “Not at all. I wonder what kind of fancy place you have.”

Bucky chuckled at your response. Hopefully, he wasn’t overstepping at this point as he continued to drive until he got to a luxury high-rise building. Your mouth dropped open in surprise at him pulling into the parking garage. Bucky pulled in and drove until he was in his own parking space. You both got out and he took your hand, leading the way to the elevators. You were silent as you took it all in once in the elevator. Bucky hit a button to the top level and he lightly squeezed your hand in reassurance. Once you were on the top floor you approached a single door in front of you. Bucky unlocked the door and led you inside. 

The place was huge and screamed luxury penthouse. The kitchen was the size of your entire apartment. The entire floor was open-concept and had paintings on the walls. You passed by a wall with pictures and immediately recognized the two men from the restaurant, Sam and Steve, next to Bucky.

“These two are my best friends. We’ve known each other for many years. Especially Steve, I've known him since childhood.” Bucky explained as you took the pictures in. 

“That must be nice having friends you’ve known for that long. I had friends before but…” you trail and clear your throat. "Anyway, it's just me right now."

“Well, you have me now so that’s gotta count. Right?” Bucky smirked at you. 

You giggle a little. “You’re right. I’m so happy that I have your friendship. So you said you had a contract ready for me? Can I see it?”

“Of course.” Bucky led you through his place until you reached his office. You followed him inside and he motioned you to sit in front of his desk. Bucky took a seat in his chair behind the desk. He looked like a man of power sitting there. Grabbing a file on his desk he pushed it forward towards you. 

“This is the contract that I had drawn up for you about our sugar daddy relationship. Everything that you asked for is in it. Plus, everything I told you about is also included. The allowance I plan to give you and the part where I will pay all your debts and monthly bills. Please take your time reading it.”

You took the file from Bucky and started to read it. Everything, he just said, was in it. The money, the bills being paid, and even a section about whether both decided on a relationship down the road. Then there was a section that mentioned new housing. How odd. You skim below that and read that he would be getting you a new car since yours wasn’t in good shape.”

“You do want to spoil me. A new car? A new place to live? Are these necessary?”

Bucky chuckled at your questions. “I want only the best for you. Your apartment, while quaint, has no space for all the new clothes, shoes, and purses I bought you. If you’ll allow me I found you a space of your own. It’s owned by my friend Steve. It’s big enough that you can paint in one of the rooms so we won’t have to rent a studio unless you want it. I will leave that up to you.”

You couldn’t believe what he was saying this was way beyond anything you could ever imagine. “I’m truly speechless. I-I never expected this much from you.”

“Like I said before sweetheart, I’m just looking for companionship and friendship. You deserve the world and so much more. If I can spoil you along the way that makes me happy to do so. Now, if everything looks fine why don’t we sign it together.” 

You nodded your head in agreement and took the pen Bucky was holding out for you. You signed your name on the bottom of the contract and pushed the document towards him. Bucky grabbed the contract and signed his name at the bottom. Bucky figures he can send a copy of the contract tomorrow to his attorney and friend Sam.

Bucky gets up from his chair and walks to where you are sitting. “Now that’s out of the way, why don’t we get you home? We can discuss your new living arrangements tomorrow and get you a new car then.” 

“That sounds like a plan to me. I really can’t wait but Bucky, who is going to help me move?”

“I’m hiring a moving company for you so you don’t have to worry about anything. Let’s keep your new things here until you move. Then when you have a closet big enough we can move it all in.”

“Wow. You've got this figured out already, huh?” You got out of your chair and followed Bucky out of the office. 

He led you back out of his penthouse and back to the elevator. Once you reached the Escalade you got back in and Bucky drove you home. While driving you back in silence Bucky reached for your hand and held it while he drove. It was sweet; these little gestures that he made like holding your hand or a kiss on your hands or forehead. You have to admit they made your stomach knot up at times in the best way. But you had to remind yourself this was just a friendship, an agreement between two friends. 

Bucky pulled up to your apartment and walked you to the door. Getting your keys, you go to open the door but before Bucky could kiss your forehead you move in kissing his cheek. 

“Thank you for the day of shopping, Bucky. I appreciate being spoiled by you. I can’t wait to wear everything that you bought me at some point.”

“Speaking of wearing your dresses, I have a charity function in a few days. I hope it’s not too late for you to join me.” His hand caressed your cheek gently. 

“That’s plenty of time for me to know. I can get my schoolwork done before then so I don’t have to worry about falling behind. Thank goodness I only have three weeks until finals. Then I’m all of yours for the summer.”

Bucky had to admit he liked the thought of that. Being able to take you on trips and not worrying about college. 

“Alright, well I will see you tomorrow then. Sleep well, sweetheart. Text me in the morning.”

“I will. Good night Bucky.”

“Goodnight, doll.”

You walked into your apartment and closed the door. You sigh thinking of his cute nicknames for you and the way he’s spoiling you. Never have you been spoiled like this before. Glancing around your apartment you smiled. Guess it’s time to move on to a better place.

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[flwrkid14]

Tim and Danny vs. La Llorona: A Poorly Thought-Out Vacation

Tim and Danny go to Mexico.

Not for a mission. Not because the Bats sent Tim on some grueling training exercise. Not even because Danny has ghostly obligations there.

No, they go because Tim—who functions on caffeine, stubbornness, and an obsessive need to solve mysteries—finds himself deep in a research spiral at 3 AM and decides he has to investigate La Llorona.

Danny, ever the enabler, thinks this is the funniest thing he’s ever heard. So of course he agrees.

That’s how they end up in Mexico under the flimsy excuse of a couples getaway, which might have worked if they were actually relaxing instead of breaking into abandoned churches, trekking through haunted rivers at 2 AM, and interviewing old locals who warn them, very seriously, not to look too closely.

And they should have listened.

La Llorona isn’t like anything they’ve faced before.

She isn’t a ghost—not the kind Danny knows. She doesn’t interact with the living the way Amity ghosts do. She doesn’t challenge, doesn’t fight, doesn’t rage. She weeps.

Her cries aren’t just sound. They press. They drag like sorrow itself has weight, filling the air, seeping into bones, making it impossible to breathe without tasting grief. It’s more than a haunting. It’s a story, whispered and passed down, told in hushed voices over flickering candlelight.

Danny, usually so sure in ghostly matters, visibly hesitates.

Because she isn’t just one woman. She isn’t just one tragedy. She is all of them—every mother who has ever lost a child, every grief too vast to fade. She is guilt and mourning and regret so powerful that it shaped her entire existence. If obsessions define a ghost, then La Llorona is the embodiment of a mother's sorrow. She is legend.

And legends are different from ghosts. Danny’s seen it before—how stories, when believed in enough, can shape the Infinite Realms. How ideas, memories, fears, and folklore can take form. But this? This is something else.

La Llorona doesn’t seek revenge. She doesn’t have an unfinished goal, an obsession anchoring her to existence. There is no resolution, no final act that will let her pass on. There is only grief—raw, endless, inescapable.

And grief cannot be fought. It cannot be reasoned with. It cannot be solved.

But it can be heard.

So Tim and Danny do the one thing no one else has ever done. They listen.

They don’t run. They don’t challenge. They sit by the water’s edge, let her cries wash over them, let her sorrow fill the space between heartbeats.

And for the first time in centuries, she doesn’t scream alone.

(When they leave, the river is just a river. And though the legend will live on, her cries do not follow them into the night.)