#fuck off wilson

[assiraphales]

deadpool flirts with everyone and it usually doesn’t matter because he flirts with everyone and the general response is “ok wade”/no response. but with wolverine? with wolverine it’s obvious that whole damn movie he would fuck that man. the eye contact the smirks the innuendo the carefully placed claws. just say the word

[doreensladle]

stunned condition in real life

[icarusredwings]

Thinking about Logan forgetting that he IS infact gay sometimes. This man was born in the 1800s and has been in toxic masculine places for a very long time. Is the army pretty gay? Yes. But you aren't allowed to admit it or say it.

Logan: Why the fuck am I on the pride months staff member list? *shakes around paper*

Jubilee: *Blinks* ..... ??

Logan: *Crosses arms* Does it look like I'm gay!?

Jubilee: *slowly reaches for phone* Mr. Howlett Please come to the events organizer office

Logan: ?? Im right here.

Wade: *shows up* You called, Firefly? Oh hi pumpkin!

Jubilee: *Gestures to Wade* Is this not your husband?

Logan: And?

Wade: Ohhh is this about the thing in the closet? Look I swear I locked it!!

Jubilee: Im going to have Jean erase my memory of you ever saying that. Logan.... Is that your husband?

Logan: Yes??

Jubilee: Then you're gay.

Logan: No, im not!

Wade: YEAH!! He's bisexual.

Jubilee: Logan... Do you like men?

Logan: No! What do I look like a southern pansy?

Wade: YEA- wait.... what??

Wade and Jubilee: Should... should we tell him?

[donutdrawsthings]

It's still on my mind... save me

[sea-buns]

the smoothest fucking neurodivergent flirting I've ever seen holy shit

[pigeonneaux]

I hear you call my name (and it feels like home)

[randomsufff]

You know what I really need in fanfics? More confession scenes where one person drops the confessions then runs, fast as fuck, in the other direction.

Like, obviously they’ll meet back up eventually and talk about it (which is hilarious in itself that they would have to sprint to catch up while yelling why they’re like this) , BUT THINK ABOUT IT!!! It 1) give the other person a chance to gather their thoughts so the person confessing doesn’t have to sit in anxious silence and 2) allows the confessor to get it over with quick and overcomes that anxiety over confessing. Also it’s just fucking hilarious.

Like imagine your fav paring or whatever, they get to that part where one (or both idk) realizes their feelings for the other but they’re just anxious to be vulnerable like that or they fear rejection, whatever. One of them suddenly goes, fuck it, and they turn to the other. (Maybe they’re on a sidewalk, maybe they’re in a park IDK endless possibilities here) and they go:

“ok I’m about to say something, it’s nothing bad (I hope) and I’m willing to talk about it after I say it. I’m 100% serious, this is really not a joke. But I’m going to say this and run to (relevant location). Ok? Ok…. Don’t freak out… iminlovewithyou” *Cue maniac SPRINTING as fast as humanly possible in the other direction* (Bro I’m cracking up just typing about this)

AND THEN!!! You get to chose how they react after a few stunned seconds. Do they sprint after them? Do they shout to bring their ass back over to them? Do they race like hell to beat the other at the determined location??? I don’t know, but it’s hilarious as fuck and can transition seamlessly into heartfelt feeling talk.

(Thinking about this with specific ships is funny as hell too)

Idk I think of more fics had this trope we could all have a grand ol silly time instead of accidentally speed reading through confession schemes because the stress is too much then having to go back and re-read it to fully process it, as one does. You know?

[justabunchofdragons]

"just looking at you hurts. i'll order up some extra pain meds." "i love you" and that insane half-dismissive gesture wilson does. this happens after house, famously a staunch atheist, electrocutes himself in the hope of a spiritual experience. we never find out what happened, but we know something did, something important, something he wanted to tell the guy who insisted that the space between death was the best feeling ever, and then house says he loves wilson. wilson thinks house is delirious from the morphine, but nothing house says ever sounds that genuine. i love you because i just died and you were standing over my bed and i knew you would be and i love you because you aren't angry at me for almost killing myself again and i love you because you care about me like no one else and i love you because maybe i need to say it in case i don't make it the next time. because there's no sun in the hospital so sunshine on your face won't say it for me. because every inch of my body aches so i can't move to show you. because we've been fooling around with this feeling but i'm never uninhibited enough to say the truth and i want to say it so i'm going to. and maybe we never mention it again. but maybe house entertained a small, tiny possibility that it could change everything.

[brainrotcharacters]

"found your new anchor being"

"and we're doing just fine, you piece of shit"

[obviousanon]

Guys. Guys. Guys you need to see this.

Don't tell me this motherfucker doesn't like pain. Ever. Because you're never gonna win.

Logan and Wade fucked in that Honda Odyssey.

[castielsprostate]

hard of hearing wade wilson my beloved!!!!!!! unhealing scars on logan howlett my beloved!!!!!!!! wear and tear on their immortal skin from living their life my beloved!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[astal-art]

undefined

This is so fucking funny there are so many things about this oh my god

[jackwhiteprophetic]

Yeah okay but imagine the guy that made your old workplace, where you worked a fucking dangerous job where you put yours and other people's lives on the line, a living fucking hell by contributing to racism and misogyny and all that fucking bullshit, is now ten years later dating(?) a member of your fucking family who you feel incredibly protective over, and who has just come out, and who is someone who you have literally held while his heart was no longer beating and when he was sobbing and self sacrificial and he has saved your life as many times as you've saved his, so obviously you're gonna try and find out that man's intentions... And then he just responds like that. Idk. I think that man should fear Hen more, and that he should have more fucking shame.

[maiaifaggot]

cuddy/house/wilson is so important to me like theyre so codependent and theyre all haunting each others narratives !!

cuddy needs house for the hospital and for the patients he saves and for the fundings they give and for herself, and she needs wilson to keep house in line

house needs cuddy because he beeds the job at her hospital and no one else wouldve let him do what she does, and he needs wilson for practically everything

wilson needs house because he makes him both worse and better at the same time and he needs his neediness and he needs to take care of him, and he beeds cuddy because shes one of the few people that can tolerate him and has known them both for so long

theyre so important to me and im Comepletly sane about them<3 (thats a lie thats a lie thats a lie thats a li)

[captainkirkk]

I'm on season 3 of House MD and I really appreciate that they've graduated from "petty" medical malpractice to straight-up assisted suicide

[sciderman]

when did anons get nuked 😟

they wouldnt stop spoiling deadpool 3 and now i've seen it but kept anon off to prolong the punishment so they feel it