#gayest thing i've ever heard

[sillylilguyontherunfromthefbi]

THIS GAY LITTLE OLD MAN HAS ME IN A CHOKE HOLD. I HAVEN'T EVEN PLAYED THE GAME, AND THE MORE AND MORE ANGST I SEE ABOUT HIM THE MORE I GET PULLED DEEPER INTO THIS RABBIT HOLE.

He has the eyes of a tired 36 year old man who has been worked to the bone by capitalism's idea of a stable job and just needs fucking sleep and I genuinely love that about him.

[the-algebra-thing]

bro that shot of inumaki with his arms off is CRAZY lmfao it's the funniest shit I ever seen. literally the entire rest of the show he's shuffling around in a baggy ass shirt or lolloping across the screen and falling on the ground with panda for the give it back ending in a big old overcoat or waving a megaphone and a peace sign around or spectating maki matches in his stupid stupid clunky keith kogane core boots. and I suppose this is all to contrast and thus heighten the impact of the tongue tattoo shit but genuinely I forgot. he is just a silly little nerd to me. and they were like hm I think we maybe went a little too hard on the silly little nerd thang let's kick everybody awake again ! quick before the season ends stick in a black bg pan up shirtless shot! make sure to draw in all his ribs and give him the sluttiest waist you've ever seen! I'm losing it guys it's so funny to me

[isa-belle1367]

I ship morgwen and merthur just because I think Uther would have been pissed that both of his kids were both A, Gay. B, Dating their servants like they couldn't even find a noble.

Also, the interactions between the 4 get 10× more funny

-----

Arthur: "Is it just me or are the servants really attractive."

Morgana: "No, you're right. It must be the new training process or something."

----

*merlin and Gwen doing chores*

Merlin: "No, I'm telling you, Arthur wearing a leather jacket is probably the gayest thing that's ever happend to me."

Gwen: "fuck that, did you SEE morgana in that red dress. I damn near committed treason right then and there."

----

Arthur: "So... you're also dating your servant?"

Morgana: "...Yeah."

Arthur: "...okay, so I'm not the only one."

----

*Gwen and Merlin both leave the royal chambers late at night*

Merlin: "...You too?"

Gwen: "It's not my fault she wore that dress."

Merlin: "You literally dress her for these events it is 100% your fault."

Gwen: "Oh, is that why Arthur was wearing a low-cut shirt with a leather jacket earlier?"

Merlin: "...You did not have to call me out like that"

----

Arthur: "Does Gwen also objectify you?"

Morgana: "Yeah... I'm pretty sure she talks about it with Merlin."

Arthur: "Yeah I've heard them talking while they are doing their chores... I don't even think half of what they talk about is possible."

Morgana: "I've learned to tune them out."

[fox-guardian]

i think my favorite part about the tma liveshow with the Dog Incident is the fact that it's canon. like the fluff episodes are cute and fun but they also aren't canon and weren't written to be considered potentially canon, they're just fun lil fan things. the liveshow tho is meant to be considered canon. which means that yes, jon did in fact canonically go "like, in general?" to being asked if he'd seen a dog (which let's be real that's a mood i would also do that if caught off guard)

but also essentially jon was like "okay so you work for me, cool, and i could Fire You If Don't Fix This Immediately" and martin literally Looked This Man In The Eyes and said "i mean yeah, probably heh :) oH-" with the gayest processing delay i've ever heard in my LIFE. i honestly don't think that was any of his little manipulations of getting people to underestimate him or whatever i really think he was just that gay about Handsome Man With Nice Voice Speaking Authoritatively At Him that it took him a minute to process. and that's CANON. that's REAL. he DID THAT. i can't get over that.

[vidalswife]

"You don't have a heart"

"Yes, I do. It's black, and it beats for you."

Okay so that was probably the gayest thing I've ever heard!

[worldseer]

JJK is the gayest manga/anime I've ever known or heard of, and I know many BLs by name. JJK is gay but done so artfully and my writer brain is going fucking bananas. And ik some things are canon/not canon, but come on now. Look at the damn material. That's gay shit. Gege keep it up, I love you.

[that1mania]

I basically just finished playing Persona5 for the first time, and I'm so mad you can't date the guys. This is one of the gayest things I've ever heard and you're telling me its not from someone I can date????

[the-snailqueen]

Sirius: *breaths*

James: that's the gayest thing I've ever heard

[chaxan08]

Kate: *breaths*

Peter: That's the gayest thing I've ever heard.

[kuroo-hitsuji]

Thinking about how Diavolo planted an entire fucking tree, in his fucking hidden childhood hangout spot (protected from anything and everything else in the forest that may try to get to it, mind you, so that is just about the most well-protected tree in the entire devildom--), and of course made sure it grows some of the most Quality apples in hell... Exclusively because he wanted to show Lucifer Devildom apples. What the fuck. That is the gayest thing I've ever heard. And then you find this all out specifically because he turns your little apple picking date with him into Fawning-Over-Lucifer hour, I--

He's pining so fucking hard, man. They're literally so fucking gay. The fact that these two motherfuckers basically canonically have the longest slowburn in fucking History is eating me alive orz

[deadpool15]

Experiment

"What did you say," I ask, looking at her laughing. I'm sitting here with one of my closest friends, smoking. After work, I've been looking for stress relief, and what better way to be calm and cool than weed. I'm surprised I managed to get Bada to agree to smoking weed. She doesn't really have an issue with it she just chose not to do it. Which I respect, so after the first offer over what seemed to feel like a year ago, I simply stopped asking. I didn't want her to think she had to smoke because I did. So I let it go. Until today, after she pulled up to my house to hang, she asked if she could take a hit.

It startled me. She simply smiled and asked again. And I had to ask her if she was sure cool with doing it. I had completely forgotten we were supposed to hang out while I was just chilling on my balcony staring at the stars. Sitting in complete silence, she finally spoke up again, "Come on, don't look at me like that. I just wanna know. Are you really gonna make me say it again?" I start to laugh at loud. Still taken a back by what she just asked me, it's weird especially coming from Bada Lee of all people. "You just practically asked me when I knew I liked vagina for sure. Sorry if I'm not supposed to be shocked." She turns her head, looking back at the city rolling her eyes playfully.

"It was simply a question Janna, don't go jumping to conclusions." I stare at her face for a while, looking for any sign of lie on her face. Before I sigh and decide to play into this weird conversation. Many may have thought at first glance that Bada was the gayest person you'd ever see. I mean shit I thought she was gay and my gay alerting system was never wrong well until I met her. She has both masculine and feminine traits, and it seems as if God took every step of his way to carve out every detail that was strictly for women. When I found out she was straight, I literally felt lied to. Then, I thought maybe she was simply confused and that thought distinguished when she started dating Howl, well until now.

"Are you attracted to women?" She tried to avoid eye contact with me after she heard the question, "Come on, let's go to my room." I told her as I grabbed her wrist and led her back inside the house into my bedroom. I Thinking maybe it would be better if she was comfortable with the situation. "So, have you found any girls catching your eye? And I mean in like a I wanna date or fuck her type of way not a, oo she is pretty. Even a straight person can acknowledge that a member of the same sex is good-looking, but do you feel a certain type of way?" She is caught guard by all the information I just laid on her and just says yes. "So you found girls attractive, or is there a girl in mind?" She turns away from me and moves from the floor to my bed and sits down while grabbing my pillow to hold.

"There is this girl. At first, I was questioning why I would like her like that because we don't really have a lot in common, you know. Like I'm a dancer, and she is a full-time student working her way to be working as an attorney. But spending time with her had made me feel things, you know. That not even Howl made me feel. It's scary if I'm being real right now. But I don't know." I look at her smiling in amazement for being able to actually express her feelings to me all in one go. With most people, they tend to sit there and beat around the bush to avoid telling people they like certain things. "Wow, you said you know like twice someone is down bad, I see. I'm not judging, though I'm actually quite happy you were able to admit all that. I'm proud of you."

She turns away, getting shy, while trying to distract herself by rolling up the pillow in her hand into a ball and hitting it. "Thanks, Janna. So now, can you answer my question? Maybe it might help me realize if I actually have genuine feelings for her." I stare up at the ceiling trying to remember the question she asked me until it eventually hits me. "Oo, ok, so I was like 13 years old. Spending the night at my close friends house for the first time. I mean, you know how my parents are, and she suggested playing this game of true or dare. While playing, somehow she dared me to kiss her, and I leaned in and just went for it, it kinda got a bit weird for us after that, but I started seeing women differently. Like, it wasn't just a wow she is pretty vibe anymore. I wondered how it would feel to date them. Then I dated a girl. While it was an experiment for her, it meant a lot to me. It did hurt when she didn't end up being into girls, though it helped me figure out my sexuality."

As I finished speaking, we just sat there in silence, I noticed that Bada was looking at me a bit unusual. It took a while for me to understand what was wrong. Had I said something? Though, when I caught her eyes dipping down to my lips and then my chest, only for them to get stuck there while biting her lips. I realized when was going on. So I just went for it, not thinking about the consequences. I grabbed her and placed it on my breast, making sure to hold her hand while doing it. "Bada, the girl were talking about. Do I perhaps know her? Or is it me, it's ok you can tell me?" She slowly gulps, but it seems she can't take her eyes off her hand. I move to take her hand off when she grips my breast, causing me to let out a whimper. "If I said it was, what would be your response?" I move closer to her and grab her other hand, placing it on my other breast. "I would say that means you're basically my girlfriend because I've been in love with you for a while." She looks uo at me like I've held the galaxy up.

The idea of someone looking at me with this much love has always been something I dreamed of. "Would you like to see them, you know, to complete your first gay mission." I say, gesturing to my boobs while laughing. She stares at me getting nervous again, she is so fucking cute right now. "You don't have to baby". "Oo, we are already on pet names. Someone is a bit bold. But I really want to, baby." I say while slowly moving my hand towards her neck to pull her closer. Our noses touching, yet is never feels close enough. We glance down at each other's lips before she speaks up again, causing me to smile. "Well, then baby, who am I to stop you." We both make our way to lean in, the kiss is so fucking good I forget we need air. She makes her way to move away, but I continue to make out with her passionately.

"Baby, wait, look, I've never done this before. Least not with a girl, but I really really wanna fuck you right now." She says while looking at me grabbing my hips with one hand still on my breast. I start to stare down at her hands before laughing, "I guess we have figured out what your favorite part of my body is, huh?" She is about to move her hand while shyly looking around the room. "Sorry." "No it's ok. I like having your hands on me." She then grips my hip, moving back in for another kiss. Only to stop again,"I remember I was promised a show." I smirk at her words. It seems she is getting more and more comfortable with her words. "Then a show you shall have." I move away from her stepping off the bed. Grabbing the bottom of my shirt, I made my way to pull it off my hand while quickly turning around so she was facing my back.

I place my hands on my breasts, I am by no means insecure, though it's fun to tease her. I turn around to face her while making sure to make direct eye contact, and for the first time tonight, she can't look away from my eyes. It's almost like she is challenging me to look away. I keep my hands there for a while until she looks down at them. "Please, for the love of God, baby, don't do this to me right now." I slowly walk over to her. She's has moved towards the edge of the bed. Waiting with anticipation. I get on top of a lap while still looking at her eyes, refusing to me the one to break eye contact. Then I finally move my hands away. She looks down and groans and makes her want to grab them again. She is so excited and almost laughable. "There just boobs, Bada, you have them too. As a matter of fact, why don't you take your top off to so I don't feel lonely."

She smiles at me cheerful and grabs her shirt, pulling it off to reveal her sports bra. Then hurries to take it off as well. I'm left starstruck just like her. "You're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. And I'm not just saying that so you could keep your top off." She laughs at me before kissing me again, making her way down my neck slowly, "like the corny ass pickup line could stop me from fucking you." I look down and laugh, before a moan slips fron my mouth when she grabs my nipple in her mouth and sucks on it. I pull her hair to look back at me and start to kiss her lips again, "I fucking love your lips, your sexy ass is never gonna get rid of me now." She moves her hand and grabs my neck firmly almost choking me causing another string of moans to fly out my mouth. For someone who has never done anything with a girl, she sure is holding up better than me.

"Are you kidding me? You are on top of me like this is my best view. If anything, I'm gonna make sure to stay with your beautiful ass every day so I could thank God for having the balls to tell you how I feel. Now, baby, I'm wet, and you're dripping, so let's do something about that, huh?"

(Guys, I'm so proud of this story, like it has to be my best one yet. I'm so proud of this and so thankful to all of you who take the time to read and thirst over the entire cast of swf2. Thank you for reading my work bestiess. Also, yall nicknames that I've randomly decided to call yall is shawty. Yall are my beautiful shawtyyyysss 🫢🤭🤭)

[the-kings-jester]

Truly the gayest thing I've ever heard was Arthur Lester saying 'it just felt wrong' in regards to marrying a woman.

He may not be queer but that mother fucker is coded somethin FIERCE. What the hell

[hackedxy0x]

Japanese version of "Playing his game" is the gayest thing I've ever heard.

They really said no subtext, just text.

[howlingday]

Cardin: ...Did you just grow a set of BALLS~?!

Jaune: I've always had balls. You've just never seen them!

Cardin: ...That is probably the gayest thing I have ever heard.

[adult-trash-lord]

So after sleeping on it and getting my tears out I have some thoughts on Apology Tour.

First off love the Blitzø character growth. My absolute favorite thing. Because it's been a long time coming and his remorse is a step in the right direction for the happy ending we want.

Stolas also needs what's happening right now, despite all of us being upset about it. Because yeah, he's going off with someone else. But two things. One he's drunk. Really drunk. And hurting. So yeah, he probably would jump at the opportunity. Two, assuming he remembers, while not hearing him out to the end, he did hear Blitzø’s confessions and want to apologize.

As much as it hurts us, if our morons are ever going to be happy, Stolas needs to experience being with someone else and Blitzø needs to experience that pain to get his head out of his ass. Verosika was right. Change starts by letting Stolas do his thing. I know it feels like we went backwards, but I think this is a huge step in the right direction for everyone.

Now some things that made me so happy.

Stolas is Stols in Blitzø's phone. All the full moon fix-its with Blitzø breaking in are half canon. Blitzø accidentally telling on himself about Striker. Stolas absolutely going off about how he's been feeling and Blitzø doing his usual cover it with sex routine. All of this felt so on point for them.

Bonuses for "THAT'S STILL THE GAYEST THING I'VE HEARD" and "Oh, Stolas. That's a romcom".

Also Stolas' liberally using the work fuck.

Anyway, Apology Tour hurt me deeply, but I think it might be my new favorite episode just for doing all it did, and can be the soud off for our boys being end game. Blitzø can admit he hates himself. Stolas can admit he does deserve better. Blitzø can now become better. It's a start.

I'm still totally writing a fix-it fic again though.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. I'm still a sobbing mess.

THAT END CREDIT SONG SLAPPED THOUGH!