#get over your selfish selfes homophobes

[merrysithmas]

the inherent homophobia of cishet ppl who outright reject obikin

and i mean this in the way that: they have every media clear cut and catered to them for eternity, it's a cishet smorgasbord. whereas queer ppl are left to pick through the bones of media for scraps of rich canon dynamics.

and then a dynamic comes along as fascinating and multifaceted and frankly undefinable (in a space wizard diff Universe forcebond manner) as obikin and the first thing straight ppl do is go "ew the idea of them as gay is gross and wrong"

they do this without thinking why queer ppl are thrilled to finally see such a rich & multilayered dynamic (because: we never get anything, especially never something so completely ambiguous and thus undeniably applicable to shipping) that can be see as eternal and beloved in the way obikin can. the context of their adult bond can, through any individual POV of a literal different Universe, be seen as friendship, familial, romantic, etc.

ppl who dont like obikin for just simple reasons like they see the dynamic differently, sure, ship whatever you want, nbd! but other ppl have a distinct ignorance of their cishet media privilege and it shooooows

just because you choose to see obiwan (who is like 14 yrs older than anakin and was a grieving barely-knighted jedi) as anakin's -literal- dad is not my problem lmao

maybe youre the one w daddy issues

[thekatebridgerton]

HAVE YOU SEEN WHAT THEY DID TO MICHAEL STIRLING?!

I haven't seen part 2 yet but I definitely saw the spoilers on my dashboard. And for all that its worth, I'm really sad about it right now.

I've seen a lot of posts invalidating the feelings of book fans by saying things along the lines of 'if you don't like Michaela Stirling you're ...you guessed it a #BadPerson' and I'm trying to process which person's feelings matter and don't matter in a world where those same people preach acceptance and support. I want my feelings to matter, I want to be allowed to be sad about the fact that this character I was looking forward to seeing is no longer going to be on screen. But the truth is a lot of people keep saying that my sadness and sorrow is invalid shaming people who feel like I do with all the self righteousness of a pastor in church. because apparently not liking the genderbeding of Michael Stirling makes me a #RaginghaterOfMinorities.

And lets be clear, everyone can say what they want, but book Michael Stirling is not going to be on screen, his story was too emeshed with the gender roles of the era, for a genderbent take to not strip and reorder the character's motivations and major plot lines in order to make him a woman. Michaela Stirling is for all intents and purposes a new and improved character. More power to her.

Still that doesn't take away the fact that I am sad and disappointed that Michael Stirling won't be on screen and that it will take me time to process this in a healthy way.

So in case nobody has said this to the crowd who is heartbroken over the genderbeding of Michael Stirling, those who feels upset and disappointed over the loss of a beloved character and don't feel brave enough to express it. Let me be the first to tell you that your feelings are valid, disliking the change in direction that was taken for a fictional character doesn't make you racist or homophobic or anti feminist or any other of those ' you are a raging hater of minorities ' epithets. ( Some of you may even be the kindest people I've met on the site) In my opinion, those feelings just make you human, and you should be allowed to feel it and process the loss in a healthy way without being told youre selfish and a bad person.

Does being heartbroken over this give anyone the right to go and harass actors like Masali Baduza for doing a job they were hired and paid to do? No. Does it give anyone the right to go send nasty harassment anons to people who actually liked the change? Also no. In fact it doesn't give the right to people who have a different opinion to harass you either. Boundaries are a two way street. Don't harass others and don't consent to receiving harassment is a rule we should all follow

But it does give you the right to feel your emotions, process them, accept the change and move on with a healthy mindset.

Its going to take me a while to get there myself, but that's what I'm doing.

And that's the tea

[bonni]

I've talked before about how I think hisoka's reputation as a "well-written villain" is undeserved and I still stand by that for reasons I'll get into at the end of this post. but I think the most frustrating thing about hisoka as a character is that I understand where that reputation comes from, because sometimes his character really works and thinking about what he could have been compared to what he is is infuriating.

hxh is, at its core, a shounen deconstruction, and one of its major themes is how the blind ambition of hunters is damaging on both an individual and interpersonal level. this is specifically reflected in gon, who's ambition and stubbornness hurts himself and the people around him (this post isn't about kurapika but obviously he is a prime example of this as well and the two have major character parallels). both ging and hisoka act as foils to gon, harboring the same blind ambition as he does but in increasingly twisted ways, with ging becoming so easily bored he can't treat a single human being with basic respect, and hisoka literally fetishizing ambition itself; gon, as a child, also finds himself facing abuse and assault at the hands of both of them, and they both use their twisted world view as a justification, with ging neglecting him for his entire life, grooming other vulnerable people in the process, and instructing them to hurt gon, and hisoka literally molesting him.

people sometimes get offended when you talk about the similarities between gon and hisoka, because yeah it feels kind of icky to compare a 12-year-old kid to the adult pedophile who's assaulting him. but the parallels exist for a reason, and that reason isn't to say that gon's going to turn out like this guy, it's to illustrate that hisoka's path is one potential outcome to prioritizing your own ambition over the lives of others. hisoka doesn't have a single relationship that isn't grounded in his own selfish worldview, and neither does ging. these are the people that gon admires and wants to surpass.

gon finally landing a punch on hisoka is an awesome moment, but in retrospect, it's upsetting. it reminds me of utena's duel against mikage; instead of confronting the ways in which they're unhealthily similar to their opponents and maybe doing some soul-searching, our protagonists celebrate the progress they've made towards their own destruction. gon's march towards a self-inflicted doom is a slow and steady one, and the chimera ant arc is the climax. gon can't be a great hunter like ging or hisoka. he cares too much about other people, and it destroys him.

so, yeah. as a foil to gon and as a source of commentary on the way a traditional shounen world encourages child abuse (not unlike our own world, hm?) hisoka is actually a good villain. the problem is, he isn't written consistently. togashi seems to like him too much and is fixated on making him some sort of anti-hero, which completely detracts from his supposed role as a villain! and, elephant in the room, he's still a homophobic stereotype. if you're going to write a predator, don't make him effeminate, and also include gay characters in your work who aren't predators (I do believe killua is intentionally gay coded but let's be honest, it's not enough). and when we look at the way gon's history of grooming and characters like palm are handled, it just becomes increasingly obvious that togashi doesn't really care about making any commentary about csa in a respectful or appropriate way. at best, it's there for shock value, and at worst, it's literally a joke. I will never respect the way that hisoka's character is handled in the series, but I do understand his appeal as a villain, and I really do wish he was written in a more respectful and consistent way.

[maoam]

Okay I want to talk about this comic here. It’s an old comic, made during or after the Kages arc. For context, the creator is a Hinata stan, Team 8 stan and NH stan. I just want to talk about how these heteronormative stans read the manga wrong.

“Hinata: Note to self, if female, don’t try to be a hero!” Except she’s wrong. Temari saved Shikamaru’s ass in part 1 already. She was also a great leader during the 4th shinobi war. And what about some others? Tsunade broke down Susanoo and healed her teammates while being broken in half, Karin took down a monster kages couldn’t, and Ino took control of the Ten-tails and stopped its attacks and connected the whole shinobi army.

Just because your favorite wasn’t heroic doesn’t mean it’s because she’s a female. It’s because she’s written to be weak and selfish. There was nothing she could have done against Pain, and she was told she would only be in Naruto’s way, but confessing her feelings was more important for her.

“Sakura: Do you realize you just started the pairing war?” It’s like these people were ALMOST aware Kishimoto didn’t give a damn about their het pairings.

“Naruto: Sasuke I wish I knew how to quite you!” Stupid homophobic Brokeback Mountain joke. Which is made even funnier when I tell you after the ending she said SNS weren’t denied anything, Naruto and Sasuke were always portrayed as brothers (again a person who doesn’t know common gay plotlines and storytelling tools) bla bla bla. So Naruto and Sasuke were always portrayed as brothers but something triggered you in Kages arc so much you had to resort into a gay joke to demean Naruto’s pain over Sasuke?

“Sai: You are a bitch for making him suffer” That’s not what he said though, he said they all rely too much on Naruto. Which is true, especially for Sakura who treats him like dirt all the time.

“Sakura: I wonder what Kishi thinks I’m gonna do with a bloody kunai” What you do best Sakura, fail. Because that has been your characterization for the entire manga except for that one fight where you were used as a puppet.

“Sasuke: Why won’t you let me kill something?” I know this person dislikes Sasuke (probably for taking Naruto’s attention from Hinata and not wanting to fuck girls she stans so hard) so I’m not surprised how she omitted all the reason why Sasuke was having a breakdown. You know, the whole genocide of his clan and all. Finding out Konoha used his brother... finding out the discrimination towards the Uchiha. But nah, let’s just make Sasuke look like he is doing it for the lulz.

“Sakura: Kakashi-sensei is so hot” Don’t know what this is all about, Sakura isn’t attracted to him lol.

“Sakura: Just when I thought I would be able to do something awesome. But nooo they need to have their stupid macho time. Being a girl in this manga sucks.” It’s just you and Hinata. You two are useless. Try to be Shino, he’s sidelined all the time. Newsflash, the manga was always about Naruto and Sasuke’s love.

“Sakura: Fuck this shit, I’m gonna be a lesbian” Yes because women become lesbians when they can’t get a man and not because they’re homosexuals.

This is what happens when you read a manga only for a character who is not relevant.

[mahoushojoe]

i think the worst muslim demographic is the hijabi girls usually living in the US or canada with display names like "yasmeen 🦋" and "fatimah 🧿" who build entire platforms about how much life sucks for hijabis and how islamophobic the west is and "muslim girl power!!!" and sell overpriced abayas - all with zero self awareness about how much privilege they have over the muslims in the "motherland" that they shallowly idealize and ignore the problems of, blatantly erasing the narrative that YES the vast majority of muslim women are in fact forced to wear hijab- and in the same breath spout the most vile transphobic bigoted homophobic AND misogynistic shit i have ever heard under the guise of a painfully contrived victim complex where they genuinely believe that trans women are Out To Get Them Without Hijab And Turn Them Away From Islam. nobody gives a shit about you and your hijab, nobody likes you, yall are Not my allies, and i couldn't give two shits about you and i hope yall stay far far away from me because beyond spreading actually harmful rhetoric to young muslim women yall are genuinely the most annoying hypocritical and selfish type of person i can imagine

[unambiguouslybi]

hi, i thought i was a lesbian for the majority of my teenage years. i recently realized that i actually do like men, and that i was suppressing my attraction to them because i lived in a very homophobic environment and i felt like i had to be "fully gay" to justify an escape. i felt like if i liked men i could just settle down with one and live a safe life instead of leaving everything behind. i felt like it was "selfish" to want women if i had a safer option. how do i get over this shame?

This is the sort of heart breaking question that doesn't have an easy answer, and I get the sense that many m-spec folks have to grapple with it-including myself.

I think you realize this, but it is not selfish to want to live as your most authentic self. I would hope that this decision is made based on who you genuinely want to be with [regardless of if they're a man or woman] rather than external pressures one way or another. Unfortunately I recognize that real life is messy, and things like this are often much more complicated.

Honestly, I'm not sure how to get over the shame of your situation. It sucks to make these kinds of decision. If anyone else has any advice for this anon, please share, I'm sure they would appreciate it

[awetistic-things]

🧋 a vent ab my parent <3

cw^^ anxiety attacks mentioned, verbal abuse, self harm mentioned, caps

|🍄| keep yourself safe and don’t read this if you know it will trigger! Ava has some cool non trauma dump posts that you can look at instead! |🍄|

she calls me names all the time. like all of the time. it’s not just annoying, it hurts. like a lot. she calls me things like a*hole and weirdo, jokingly. I always laugh though as a coping mechanism (no clue why??). me and my brother called her Karen when that was trending and she can’t get over it. telling her to get over it is not an option. last time I told her how I felt she got super angry and said “you have no right to tell me what to do” or something like that. I actually didn’t even tell her what to do, I asked a rhetorical question which effectively acts as a statement. anyways, it triggered an anxiety attack or something (?) idk. I didn’t have trouble breathing I was just very emotional and scared to the point where I was going to call the police because I thought she was going to hurt me (physically or verbally) and I wasn’t sure anybody in my house would help me or would be able to. she’s remarked multiple times that she could “really be crazy”. I locked myself in the bathroom for safety. I turned the light off to prolong her not knowing I was in there. I actually hid in the bathtub where you wouldn’t be able to tell if I was in there so if she unlocked the door from the outside she wouldn’t find me immediately. since we’re already here talking about things she’s done she’s also called me &my brother racial insults. whenever she’s mad she calls us the nword and it feels racially motivated. my siblings and I are all half black. she’s also technically half black but nobody would perceive her as such. she has white skin, we do not. that same day I got super scared and stuff my mom requested something from my brother. he said no because he has the right to do whatever he wants including say no. she got mad and somehow (most things are foggy from that night) we ended up driving to McDonalds to grab some food. she was speeding which also triggered me because I’ve been in a car accident before and even though it wasn’t a total wreck, it was still traumatic. speeding and slamming breaks is very triggering for me. my school bus driver recently slammed on brakes for no reason. she was trying to make a point that we should wear seatbelts, which, point taken but that triggered me so bad. I know it’s not really her problem but I was holding back tears. anyways sry for tangent back to the story. so we were on our way to McDonalds and she’s speeding. as she’s speeding she’s going on and on about how my brother is an nword hard r for saying no to her after “aLl ShEs DoNe FoR hIm”. she’s done nothing but abuse him and I only have sympathy for him. she does this all the time. you say no and she gets so mad. she’s diagnosed with bipolar something but I’m not sure exactly what. I don’t talk about it because I’m afraid of her reaction. I’m scared that I will literally die. my siblings are moving out. as selfish as this is, I won’t have anymore protection. I’ll be her therapist and her outlet for anger, frustration, everything. my other parent isn’t even an option for me. I would rather be homeless than live with him. Surprisingly, I don’t self harm. that actually makes me feel very invalid but I’m pretty sure daily verbal abuse is sufficient trauma. (any trauma is “sufficient“!)

anyway that is a LONG ask. side note completely unrealted: my crushes name is ayva but I’m not gonna ask her out like ever bc she hates me for some reason (probably the autism!!) and is a suspected homophobe. but anytime I go back to your carrd to check your ask rules and stuff bc I always forget and/or wanna double check I think of her 💕. also if you want to hear more about my family issues or my crush (pls ask me to talk about her pls) or something I’ll do it ig?

if you actually sat here and read this whole thing ily forever and ever and ever! 🫂💏 /p

[tw: check ask]

[anulithots]

They aren't... uglier emotions per se. The ones I never see in stories. The ones I wish I could write about in my own.

Jealousy and contempt and that wet hot anger at people who don't deserve it. The worry that you're too self-centered. It's not even that irrational of a fear because you have been self-centered before.

Thoughts about the worst outcome. If it's for others that means it's about hurting others. They are reactive, uncontrollable, here within a fraction of a second.

Worry that you may become like your parents in the bigoted/racist/homophobic, transphobic, aphobic sort of way. Sometimes the reactive thoughts are like that. Hopefully they just parrot and fear.

Unreasonable. That's what it is. If I get angry because they perceived me while I attempted something. So small. Somewhat sticky. Like old jelly on my hands. It's been hours. I can't wipe it off with a napkin because that's a sensory thing that sends me over the edge. But it's sticky and on my hands and after a while that's worse.

If I cry and feel awful over little things. Because of my rejection sensitivity, does that make me self-centered? They say not to victimize myself. If I try to comfort myself through everything, if I say that my executive dysfunction requires me to gently guide myself through simple tasks, if I say that I tried the other way for years, and it only works if it's my own. Is that selfish?

And what if I don't remember what they like? What if I want to share what I like and hope they like it too?

What if I never speak a word about it? What if I made myself so small and wanted others to pity me? What if I wanted to hurt myself out of spite so that way the others would notice? What if I read books with wump tropes and hoped that if I got hurt, I could hide it and others might notice?

But I hope they never do. It's always in theory. Spite. What's that like? Have we explored that in a story yet? Am I brave enough to?

What if my emotional regulation, everything I have for navigating my internal world, and little traits when I don't have the words... what if that all comes from copying stories and shows? Do they have something on the traits that they give to villains, so I can know what that feels like?

What if I seek attention? No, actually, what if I'm attention-seeking? What if just asking and thinking about this makes me victimizing myself?

What if only remembering things that interest me makes me selfish?

And what if I never write about it? Because the ugliest feelings and emotions and thoughts can't compare to the uncomfortable ones. The sticky ones. The secret ones that we hate more than the vilest deeds.

You can't be annoying.

[haoleiah]

ooooooo i hate women!!! specifically my grandma when’s she being a little baby bitch aren’t you too fucking old to be throwing a temper tantrum you fucking cracker like holy shit why are you so bitchy just calm down like bitch you’re disgusting fucking double standards make me want you to push you down the fucking stairs HOLY HELL!!!!!!! ohhhh you think you’re earning favor with god by acting like this? bitch please fuck off with that fake vibe ableist homophobic?? transphobic??? yeah bitch just go to hell god fucking hell i have to stand your stupid ass face when you’re pissed but ahahah surprise surprise tan family tradition i get faceblasted with EVERYONE’S STUPUD FUCKING PROBLEMS I HATE THEM I HAGE THEM OHHHH BUT I CANT EXPRESS MY FUCKING FEELINGS CAUSE THEYRE INVALID ARENT THEY????? HUH BECAUSE I ACT LAZY??? BE IN MY SHOES MOTHERFUCKERS YOU WANT TO JUGGLE 6-7 ASSIGNMENTS?? LEARN DIFFERENT SOFTWARE???? HAVE NO FREE TIME TO GO OUT AND TOUCH GRASS?????? OHHHHHH IF I TELL YPU THAT ITS JUST THAT IM LAZY IM INCAPABLE OF DOING THAT!!! yeah so fucking what!!! you wanna compare me with others? NEWS DUXKING FLASH ASSHOLES IM ME NOT OTHERS!!!! GAHHH KYS KYS KYSSSSSSSSSSSSS I. wish. i. could. have. a. proper. family. hghhhhfhfbfhhdhdhdhshhdhdhshs i’m still not done shitting on old granny for fucks sake it’s seriously so annoying i want to THROTTLE HER WHEN SHES LIKE THIS OLD ASS BITCH ILL THROW YOU DOWN THE STAIRS GAHDBDBDBFHSGSGGGAGAGAHHAGDGDH HNNGHHFB GNNNNNN DH. god i need to like go into one of the breaking rooms one day,,.,,,,,.,,,,.,sometimes i wish to do a little murder a little strangle a little punch in your face SHUT UP BOZO!!!!!!! WHAT GETS ME EVERYTIME IS THAT ITS SO IMMATURE BITCH YOURE OVER 60 WHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE A BABY WAH WAH WAH. stupid selfish goofy ahhhhhh i want to run you over so badddddddd j want to slam your head into concrete i want to do so much unspeakable things hhffnfhdhshshshsh i want to fucking ahahahhhahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaha adhd h bdg rhdfggtjd fnf he i need you gone. like fucking gone. she’s so fucking annoying hhehehhhhdhdhdhshdhhdhdhd die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die die fjrjrrhehdbhhdhhdhhhdhehhd dude fjrjdhdhdhbdbsbehshdbshrhdhshshdjbdhdhdhdhdhdhdhajsjkfhd i’m just so fucking PRESSED bro if i bring up her fucking problems to her you think she’ll self reflect and be like “oh no! i didn’t realize that” NAHRRRRRR she’s gonna go fucking monkey mode and try to guilt trip me for fucks sake how many ducking times have i heard the same old same old this is why i want to launch you into space gif fucking dam dnf dms!!!!!!!!!5!))!5!5!4!;!!:!;!(!5?5!5!5!;$:&:$:$):):?:):):$$/$/$:!:!:$:$:$$:$:$;$:$:$:$$;$$$$$))$3$$3:$$:$:$)))))):$$/1))hhshdhshgshshshshagdgdgshshagshhsshsggsgshagshsgahsgagahfghshsgshahdhdhshahhdhsgahdhshgshsshdhdhsbaghdhdhajahshzhdhzhafahdjhdaggshsjdhshagdhjdhagshdjsgagdjdidbdhsgushdhsgdhdihstsudooxodhdhfosgjsbdudifjcibdhdhshwhdidjejdieidiieidieieididiieididieidieidieieiidieeiidieieidieieidieidiieidieieididieudiiwidudueuduidueudueueududiisieididieidiidieieisidiidieidididiiejejdjdjjeididjdiiwieididieidiieixieieidiidieidieidieidiieidieieidiixididididiieieieidiudidididiisidiidkyskyskuskyssyysyyyy!!!!!!! just roll over already got fucking damn HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[musclesandhammering]

Every Single Issue I Have With S*lki (It’s Not Just The Selfcest)

Here goes. I threatened to post this a few days ago and never did, but I just saw a s*lki stan Twitter account claim that Loki caring about Sylvie more than the whole multiverse was a Good And Romantic thing and it pushed me over the fucking edge, so now you all have to read this. I’ve divided it into categories cause there’s just THAT much.

OOC Bullshit

• First and foremost, no amount of mental gymnastics you do will ever make me believe that this specific Loki- the one that just invaded New York, that just came off a year of Thanos Torture, that just got done being influenced by the sceptre, that was literally in the middle of a crisis already, and then on top of that went through all the trauma of Ep 1- would even be worried about a romantic relationship. That would be the furthest thing from his mind. Go back and watch how he acted in Avengers- you think that guy would abandon his previous mission to become a snivelling simp for a girl he’d just met 3 days prior? Yeah, there’s no universe in which that makes sense.

• “It’s very in character for Loki to fall in love with himself lololol-“ NO, it’s literally not. Out of all the characters in the mcu, I don’t think I can think of anyone that genuinely hates themselves more than Loki. He even referred to all his other male variants as “monsters” and said meeting them was “a nightmare” in this series. He’s got so much self-loathing, plus the fact that he genuinely thinks himself to be an evil backstabbing scourge- so there’s no evidence at all suggesting that he would ever develop a fondness for, or even be inclined to trust, another version of himself, after only knowing them for 3 days.

• Building on that, the whole concept of Loki falling in love with a version of himself just feeds into the annoying ass misconception that he’s a narcissist. No matter which way you stack it, he’s not. If you’re referring to NPD, he doesn’t fit the criteria, and if you’re saying “narcissist” just as a slang term meaning “selfish and arrogant”, that still doesn’t accurately describe him. But when creators like Waldron and Herron do things like having him fall in love with himself, it makes it so much easier for casual viewers to think that he is.

Shitty LGBT Rep

• It’s kinda sus that Loki’s are allegedly genderfluid and yet the only female-presenting variant we see (and apparently the only female-presenting variant there is, cause the male Loki’s all seemed unfamiliar with the concept) is treated as some kind of mind-bogglingly special paradox. Also very sus that, out of all the Loki variants, the one our Loki falls in love with just so happens to be the only female one. What a coincidence.

• The fact that the creators of the show went around bragging about Loki’s bisexuality and Marvel purposefully (lbr) allowed stories about Loki possibly having a male love interest to circulate, specifically enticing queer viewers to watch the show (you know, the definition of queerbaiting), and then instead of having a male love interest (Loki was the first queer main character, so it was the perfect opportunity) they gave us *gestures to this dumpster fire* this… it’s just a middle finger to LGBT fans. The fact that they would rather have this relationship with all its myriad of problems than have a gay relationship is just……. Very telling.

• While him being with a woman obviously doesn’t refute his bisexuality, the fact that they showed/talked about him being interested in 3 different women (flight attendant, Sylvie, Sif) and never even hinted at him being attracted to a man, definitely makes it seem like they were trying to cover up his bisexuality to smooth things over with the more homophobic viewers. You know? It’s like “I know you’re pissed that we sorta confirmed Loki as bi, so we promise we’ll never mention it again! Or even hint at it! As a matter of fact, we’ll give him lots of female lovies and make him seem as straight as possible! That’ll take your mind off of that horrible crumb of queer rep, right? Please please please keep giving us your money!!!”

• Aside from all the other issues, at its core, the biggest reason why I think I’m so irritated with s*lki is that it took one of the most interesting, complex, and diverse characters in cinema atm and squished him into a tired ass unnecessary heteronormative subplot…. Like literally every. single. other. protagonist. ever. Loki is such a unique character, and it’s so so so incredibly disappointing that they stuck him into that same boring cookie cutter romance that happens to every other character in every other movie I’ve ever seen. It’s a disservice, and it’s honestly just not compelling or entertaining at all.

Thematic Issues Galore

• His arc didn’t need a romance. With anyone. It was unnecessary and it didn’t make sense plot-wise. In fact, one of the reasons he was my fav prior to this was because he was the only big-name mcu character whose story wasn’t muddied-up by a romance that didn’t need to be there. So much for that.

• He wasn’t emotionally ready for a romantic relationship with anyone. Hell, just a genuine friendship would’ve been pushing it for him at this point. He was in such a bad state that any relationship he got into would’ve been toxic and unhealthy for both him and the other person, and it doesn’t make sense why the writers would want to put him in one when there were so many cons and essentially no pros (other than “Uwu aren’t they cute together”).

• Sylvie’s character in general was unnecessary and Loki’s character was robbed just by her being there. The whole show became about her post-Ep 2. They spent most of the time giving her backstory, building her up, telling us how awesome she is, trying to convince us to like her, etc when what they really needed to be doing was building Loki up- cause I gotta say, if I had to describe TVA!Loki in a few words, they would be Flat, Boring, and Weak.

• The romance overtakes the plot. They spend time portraying their supposed connection that could’ve been spent adding depth and complexity to literally any of the characters. They make the big Nexus Event them giving each other googly eyes on Lamentis when it could’ve been so many other way more profound things that speak to the fundamental nature of Loki’s. They have the climax of the finale be “oh no she betrayed him to kill He Who Remains” when it could’ve been something way more compelling (Loki having a moral crisis over whether or not to kill HWR, Loki contemplating the state of the multiverse and weighing the pros and cons of freedom vs order, Loki looking into some What If situations and getting emotional about what could’ve been regarding his family, Loki realising the gravity of HWR’s offer and finally coming to terms with how important he is to the universal cycle, etc etc). The entire plot suffered in favour of a romance that half of us didn’t even want.

• It essentially reduced all of Loki’s potential character growth down to “He did it for his crush.” He seemed to at least have some motivations of his own in Ep 1-2 (feeble as they were) but after Sylvie showed up in Ep 3, literally every action he took was just him being a simp for her. Why did he lie in the interrogation? To try to protect Sylvie. Why did he fight the minutemen and Timekeepers? To survive kinda, but mostly cause it was important to Sylvie. Why did he get pruned? Cause he got distracted trying to confess his crush to Sylvie. Why did he try to get out of The Void? Cause he thought Sylvie needed him. Why did he stay in The Void? Cause Sylvie was staying. Why did he try to enchant Alioth? Cause Sylvie told him to. Why did the multiverse get cracked open, leading to an infinite number of Kangs waging war on all of existence? Cause Loki didn’t wanna hurt Sylvie in their fight at the Citadel and then get distracted by her kissing him. It’s uninteresting and honestly pretty embarrassing.

• Throughout their “relationship arc” the writers do their absolute damndest to convince us that we should like Sylvie more than Loki. And you know what? It’s the most hypocritical shit I’ve ever seen. They preach and preach about how Sylvie’s life has been so difficult/we should feel bad for her/she had it so bad/poor poor sylvie/she had it SO much worse than pampered prince Loki…. But then they never even touch on any of Loki’s trauma of hardships (the ones that have been ignored for literally 3 movies now). They frame Sylvie as a good person and a Freedom Fighter after she spent literal decades/centuries mass-murdering brainwashed TVA agents and showing exactly zero remorse for it….. but then they make it their mission to constantly remind us that Loki is a terrible person and constantly put him in situations where he’s forced to acknowledge his wrongdoings/show remorse/admit to how “evil” he is for being a mass murderer for like 2 years. They show him on-screen having a wider range of powers than her, and perpetuate his whole shtick of being a “master manipulator” or whatever….. But then they make Sylvie “the brawn” more competent, intelligent, and physically capable than him. Tell me how it’s a good thing for a ship to be so narratively biased toward one character.

Missed Opportunities

• If they absolutely had to have a romance subplot, then they could’ve paired Loki with one of the characters that have already been established OR one of the characters that were a big part of the whole TVA storyline anyway. It would’ve been so interesting if they’d revealed that Loki had a history with some of the players from previous films (Sif and Fandral both come to mind). It also would’ve been really interesting if they’d given Loki a love interest that actually had some allegiance to the TVA as a whole (Mobius maybe, but not necessarily. It also could’ve been Renslayer or B-15). Hell, imo it would’ve been cool if they’d followed through with that “See you again someday” line that he said to the flight attendant in Ep 1. ALL of these characters have way more chemistry with him than Sylvie, and they were also already relevant to the plot without wasting half the show to give background info on them.

• If they absolutely had to have a hetero-presenting love story involving an enchantress-type figure, then there’s a whole Enchantress (Amora) that was actually Loki’s love interest in the comics. Plus, fans have been screaming for Amora to appear in the mcu for years. Plus, Tom literally pitched an Amora/Loki storyline way back in 2012-13. Also, Lorelei (another enchantress) is also one of Loki’s love interests in the comics, and she already exists in the mcu (she was on Agents of SHIELD). There were several different established characters for them to choose from. Creating a whole knew amalgamation of a character and going with the “she’s a Loki variant” storyline was just completely unnecessary and made no sense.

• They completely robbed us of a Chaos Twins dynamic. Had they handled Sylvie better and not forced her and Loki to smooch, the two of them could’ve had a really really complex and interesting sibling relationship. Loki could’ve stepped into Thor’s shoes and sort of used that new role to gain some self importance, and Sylvie could’ve finally had somebody to look out for her/teach her magic/be there for her. It would’ve been very aesthetically pleasing, the vibes would’ve been out of this world, it would’ve been way more profound than this bs, and frankly it would’ve been much more entertaining to watch.

• Loki’s relationship (read: obsession) with Sylvie completely overshadows all Loki’s other relationships in the show. Loki and Mobius were literally the focal point of the series in Ep 1-2, but after Sylvie showed up in Ep 3, they barely had any interactions with each other, and Mobius pretty much faded to the background entirely. Loki had the beginnings of a pretty interesting antagonistic relationship with Renslayer (with her wanting him pruned, then arguing with Mobius that he couldn’t be trusted), but after Sylvie showed up the dynamic shifted to focus on the history between her and Ravonna. Loki and B-15 started off very badly and openly disliked each other throughout Ep 1-2, and then in the end of Ep 2, Loki showed a little bit of concern for her when she was possessed, hinting that they might be inching toward a reconciliation- especially considering how obvious it was that Loki was gonna uncover the TVA’s sins eventually. There was so much potential for him to be the one to give her her memories back and convince her to change sides, but no, of course that honor went to Sylvie. In fact, after Sylvie showed up, Loki and B-15 never even spoke to each other again.

Various S*lki Fails

• If they were trying to convince us that this affection was mutual, they completely failed. There’s nothing I’ve seen that even hints at Sylvie feeling the same way about Loki that he does about her. At most, I’d say she has a slight endearment to him. She finds him likeable and she’s grudgingly fond of him, but she definitely isn’t in love with the guy. Maybe she thinks he’s cute and hopes that he gets out of this mess alright, but her mission obviously comes before him- whereas, it’s been confirmed multiple times that Loki cares about her above anything else. She doesn’t trust him, she looks at him like he’s an incompetent fool half the time, she shows little to no reaction during most of his confession moments, and she kissed him as a means to distract him so that she could get him out of her way. Look, all I’m saying is, when you get into a relationship where one of you is way more invested than the other, it never ends well.

• This goes without saying for a lot of us, but the selfcest is just straight up odd and cringey. If you’re cool with that sort of thing, fine! People can ship what they want! But don’t pretend it’s not at least a little bit uncomfortable. Yes, I know they’re not technically siblings so it’s not technically incest, and they’re also not technically the exact same person, but they’re similar enough that it makes things weird. And yes I know selfcest can’t happen in real life, so there’s no way to judge it morally, but neither can most of the other stuff that happens in these shows/movies (the Snap, Loki destroying jotunheim, superhero with powers being held accountable, mind control) and yet we still find ways to judge their morality, because they all mirror real-world events. (The snap= genocide; Loki destroying Jotunheim= bombing other countries; superhero accountability= weapons accountability; mind control= grooming and coercion). And lbr the closest real-world mirror to two versions of the same person (who may or may not share DNA, family, backgrounds, physical and emotion characteristics) being romantically involved with one another is incest. And you can be ok with that if you want- that’s your prerogative- but don’t get pissy just cause a lot of us are squicked out by it.

• The whole mirror metaphor (learning self love via each other) thing just fell completely flat. First of all, having Loki learn to love himself by looking at someone who mirrors him did not, in any way shape or form, require them to be romantically involved. But they were. Of course. Secondly, the creators have contradicted themselves so many times on whether Loki and Sylvie are the same or not, that it doesn’t even really register to the viewer that the mirroring thing was what they were going for. Finally, Loki and Sylvie are shown to have so little in common- and to have only the most bare minimum of similarities personality-wise- that it doesn’t even make sense that Loki would “learn to love himself through loving her”. Like? They’re nothing alike. So how would he make the connection that he himself is actually pretty cool, based on her alone? There’s virtually nothing in her that reflects him.

• I know the objective of the entire show was to convince us of how awesome and unique Sylvie is, but honestly her relationship with Loki just did the opposite. A hallmark of a Mary Sue is having her constantly upstage the male lead, and then having him instantly fall madly in love with her anyway. And that’s.. exactly what happened here. Everything they’re doing to try to force her character to be more stan-able is really just forcing her to look more like their self-insert OC. Which is exactly what she is. It would’ve been so much more satisfying if she didn’t have to try so hard to look cool, if they didn’t have to try so hard to make her backstory tear-inducing, if they didn’t have to turn our protagonist into a snivelling simp just to prove how incredible she supposedly is. Very much #GirlBoss energy and we all know how performative and cheap that is.

• The entire thing was too rushed, there was too little build-up, and it was nowhere near believable. As stated above, it’s ridiculously unlikely that Loki would canonically even be interested in Sylvie, and this show did nothing to explain why he was. He just suddenly was. There was nothing they showed us as viewers that would justify a guy as closed-off and preoccupied as Loki falling head-over-heels for a girl he just met. Their was no explanation, no big revelation, no reasoning, it just… kinda happened. And I’m also severely skeptical of any love story that has the characters go in this deep after only 3 45-minute episodes of exposition.

I’m sure there’s other stuff, so if anyone thinks of anything, let me know and I’ll be more than happy to add it. Tagging @janetsnakehole02 @raifenlf @natures-marvel and @brightredsunset800 for expressing interest. This is all your faults.

[slasher-male-wife]

Billy Lenz x Masc reader

This is gonna be some hurt/comfort type stuff because well I need comfort rn. Gonna be pretty much based on shit that went down like earlier with me but idk man I just cope this way ig

Synopsis: Y/N is hanging out with his friends and his boyfriend Billy. Y/N’s friends aren’t the best people and Billy kinda has to stand up for Y/N.

Warning: Mentions of self harm and self harm scars, homophobic slurs used, Violence mentioned, just verbal and emotional abuse in general. Billy says ‘pretty piggy’ once but it’s in a loving way. Other stuff I probably missed too.

Your friends had come over, Ashely and Elliot. You insisted to Billy not to mention that the two of you are dating before hand. Thankfully he listened. The four of you are on the couch talking. Ashley and Elliot are dating and they love it rub it in your face. Ashley is sitting on Elliot’s lap while you and Billy sit next to each other. Billy noticed a change around you before they came. Putting things away that showed your interest in things and changing out of your usual clothes going for something more basic. But of course they had to criticize it. “So Y/N are you sure you wanna wear shorts?” Ashely asks. You look down at your legs and back up and nod.

“Yeah I am.” You reply. She chuckles and so does Elliot.

“It’s just everyone will see you know. Those scars and think you’re some depressed loser. Or know you’re an attention whore.” She replies referring to your self harm scars. They’ve been healed for a long time now but she knows it’s still a sensitive subject.

“Billy doesn’t, I mean I don’t mind.” Billy says putting a hand on your thigh.

“Yeah well I mean of course you wouldn’t mind. No offense you’re just a bit off.” Elliot comments. Billy goes to reply but Ashley cuts him off.

“So Y/N still no girlfriend? It’s gonna be a bit awkward when we go to beach for vacation don’t you think?” She says.

“Oh I was thinking I could bring Billy.” You say. Elliot scoffs. Billy gets a bit shakey.

“ Y/N we do this every year. We only allow partners to go with us you know?” Elliot says.

“Well you brought Katlin a few times.”

“Well that’s different.” Ashley says. She gets closer and whispers something in your ear. “She’s also not an absolute weirdo and just well you know she’s pretty hot.” Billy heard this and starts bouncing his leg. Ashley goes back to Elliot and kisses his cheek. She goes in and kisses him full on.

“Billy doesn’t like this.” Billy says in your ear.

“I know just suck it up they’ll be gone soon enough.” You whisper back. Ashley pulls away and gives a fake smile. 

“So Y/N still saving up for that liposuction we talked about?” She “playfully” slaps your thigh but it’s hard enough to leave a mark. You wince and Billy goes to grab your hand but you have to push it away.

“Oh are you two dating? I didn’t know you were a fag Y/N. I thought you were a normal guy.” Elliot comments. You feel tears start to swell and you just chuckle. Billy’s frustration growing.

“Nope I’m not dating him. Just roommates you know?” You say.

“I’ll be right back.” Billy say’s getting up. You shoot him a worried look and he keeps his face blank. He walks out of the room and Ashley turns back to you. 

“How can you stand to live with him? He’s so well you know weird.” She comments. You put on a polite smile. 

“He’s not that weird really, he just functions different than most people. It doesn’t mean he’s some freak.” 

“It kinda does. He’s like probably dangerous.” Elliot says holding Ashley tighter. 

“If you feel uncomfortable around him then you can leave.” You say. Ashley gets a bitter look on her face. 

“But we’re your friends. You selfish fag, I’m the one who stopped you from self harming.” You feel the tears coming back. 

“You told me I was doing it for attention. You said I should cut the fat out of my body instead.” Billy comes back into the room. You notice the outline of a pocket knife in his pocket.

“Leave now please.” He says. Elliot scoffs. 

“No Y/N wants us here.” He says. 

“I don’t, please leave.” You say as the tears start to fall. 

“You’re kidding me.” Ashley say.

“ I said get the fuck out.” Billy says.

Ashley stands up and storms off. 

“Fucking fags.” Elliot mutters and leaves. Billy sits on the couch as you keep crying. He pulls you into his lap and hugs you. 

“It’s ok Y/N. Billy’s here. Billy will help.” You cry into his chest, wetting his green sweater. “I’ll deal with them later pretty piggy. Don’t you worry.” You spend a long time in his arms. Crying and crying. Billy pets your head and kisses your forehead. You end up falling asleep in his arms and the next morning he makes you breakfast. 

[deductioniis]

John Watson character analysis, or what is going on in John's head in tst to make him do what he did in TLD

A few premises:

What i say here below might have been mentioned already by others in the past

It's my interpretation of facts, so I might be wrong!

It contains TW // suicidal thoughts, alchololism, PTSD, grief, self-loathing, gaslighting

 

Before going right into the topic, it's better if we go back to the beginning of the show, so to analyse where John comes from. The show opens with shots from Afghanistan, a nightmare that wakes up John, leaving him sweaty and panicking. Then we see him in a therapy session, Ella telling him about his trust issues. We never know what caused these issues, but I believe that it is a cause of the war PTSD or of the sexual repression going on inside of him if we think of him coming from a conservative and homophobe family. No one really understands him, he has no one to relate to and to talk about his trauma, hence he is no longer bothered to open up to others if all he gets is nothing. 

Even if we consider John as the more empathetic and extrovert compared to Sherlock, we are reminded constantly of his struggles in relating to people and showing emotions. John is as much lost and damaged as Sherlock: he was probably dealing with past traumatic experiences, he came back from a war that left him with PTSD and he is now suicidal with nothing to look forward to. 

"You are not haunted by the war, Dr Watson, you miss it." That doesn’t really make sense if we think of John’s nightmares. But if we consider the 'war' as his inner turmoil, then it makes sense. John was literally on the point of ending it, until the moment he met Sherlock. From the nothingness, to something happening, going back to life. Though life requires feelings, John's weak point. 

I think it is also important to talk about John’s strong attachment with male figures, in particular Sherlock and Sholto. Compared to them, John is the one who is looking at them as a guide, probably because of the lack of a strong bond with his own father, thus resulting in the commonly known daddy issues. Some examples can be seen in TSoT, where Sholto is presented as John’s ex (army commander). If we think of their relationship in a romantic way, reinforced by Mary’s ‘neither of us were the first’, then we get John’s strong attachment to him: he is concerned about him, advises him to go to therapy to deal with the trauma and probably John himself has been in some sort of distress when he knew about Sholto’s accident. 

John never mentions Sholto to Sherlock, the other male person he is strongly attached to, probably because he is scared to lose him, preferring then to bottle up his emotions. This bad habit of John is recurrent: when Sherlock fakes his suicide, John at first bottles up his emotions, he doesn't even talk to Mrs Hudson because, as mentioned before, he doesn't really know if she would fully understand him. We see then at how he copes with it in Many Happy Returns. His tare héreditaire makes him find peace in drinking alcohol, probably abusing it as a way of escape from feelings. He is repressing them so much at the point of blaming himself of feeling them, adding up the sense of grief and probably guilt of not having been enough for Sherlock after all they have experienced together. But when Sherlock comes back, John finds that the only way to express what goes on in his head is by actions, attacking Sherlock for having been so careless of not even thinking about him when he fell from the rooftop. Here John is one of the many considering suicide as something selfish, where the one who leaves doesn't think of the void they'll leave inside others. This, though, is discussed and later contradicted by Sherlock himself in tld 'your life is not your own, keep your hands off it'.

Time to flashforward to TST now, whose final scenes really require John all the strength to fight the feelings he has always repressed. Grief is a tough process that we all get to face in life and that might cause different emotions. For the second time in his screen-time life, John once again decides to retreat, hiding from the world and not giving his best friend a chance to help. We know that he gives Sherlock a letter, but its content is a mystery. As he struggles himself with a direct confrontation with Sherlock, he might have written down his thoughts, probably harsher than he intended, as we later see Sherlock high and John coping in an unhealthy way with trauma. 

He is self-blaming himself for letting Rosie down, he is stuck into a dimension of things that is bigger than he is and really doesn’t know how to deal with it. As he speaks with the (fake) therapist, he is passive-aggressive, once more he is getting defensive about his own point of view. He doesn’t understand his own feelings, he doesn’t want them to be normal and ordinary during a process of grieving. He is desperately craving someone to agree with him and not going against him, making him feel even more misunderstood. He is ‘holding himself to an unreasonable standard’. He wants to be someone else, not committing the same mistakes that probably most of the important figures in his life have done. In tld, we see John who is desperately clinging to his past, his only place of comfort. But clinging to it is never good, it doesn’t really solve anything. 

He is distressed, grieving, not understanding the emotions he is feeling. For once, he wants others to return the care he is constantly giving but yet again, the trust issues come in.

His session is interrupted by Sherlock, one of John’s weak points. Sherlock’s addiction is now coming over into John’s problems. Once at the hospital all the emotions he is keeping inside to holding up to his unhealthy standards are on the point of bursting. 

He is once again trying to keep up with the ‘quicker’ minds of Culverton and Sherlock and his trust for the detective is at stake. Sherlock’s high, how can he trust him? The person he trusted the most, is letting him down, and he needs to be the one in command. Cultverton is keeping playing with John’s insecurities, playing with his trust issues and weaknesses so to make him burst. Messing up with his head and manipulating him to the point so he can get what he wants: Sherlock in his hospital room. When John is questioning his role as a doctor, he feels guilty, for not having looked after Sherlock, for not being able to deal with his grief. All these emotions bottling up to a point of no-return… 

[herinsectreflection]

The Inherent Queerness of Buffy the Vampire Slayer

I don’t think it’s any secret that Buffy is extremely popular among LGBTQ people. I couldn’t find any demographic statistics to back this up, but I feel it’s pretty self-evident. Just from having been in the fandom for over a decade, it has always felt like a more queer-dominated space than many other fandoms. Two of the biggest Buffy podcasts out there are helmed by two queer women and a gay man respectively. I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that you, reading this right now, are some manner of queer, and I bet I’d be right at least half the time. And I think this is for good reason. Buffy the Vampire Slayer is, at its core, an intensely queer show.

Now, I don’t mean just in regards to the representation, but let’s get that out of the way. The early years had Larry and pretty heavy subtext with Faith. Then S4 hits, and we get Willow’s coming out and Tara’s introduction. S5 gives us their first on-screen kiss - the first lesbian kiss on the network. S6 gives us more overt sexual intimacy between Willow and Tara, and S7 adds Kennedy and Andrew into the mix. 

There are some ~problematic~ elements to the representation of almost all of these characters. Larry employs the trope of “homophobe/misogynist is only that way because they’re secretly gay”, and is later killed off. Faith’s seduction of Buffy is simultaneously a “seduction to the dark side” of hedonism and selfishness and also a literal seduction, which binds her implied bisexuality to her villainism. Tara and Willow’s relationship is aggressively chaste compared to the other heterosexual couples on the show, and Tara’s death is very much a Bury Your Gays moment. Andrew’s sexuality is almost exclusively limited to jokes. There are no trans, ace, or explicitly bisexual people.

And this isn’t just looking back from 2021 and saying this, as if people didn’t know any better. Queer people have been pointing this out for decades. We didn’t have the same cultural awareness and vocabulary surround Bury Your Gays back in 2002, but people were absolutely aware of the disproportionate killing off of queer characters, and they talked about it in regards to Buffy. 

But, in the same way that you can’t judge a Jane Austen novel by the feminist standards of 2021 you can’t really judge a show from 1997 by the same standards as you would judge a show that aired today. That way leads madness, and ignores how these pieces of media pushed hard against the progressive boundaries of their own time. The Willow/Tara romance was huge. It can’t be overstated how revolutionary it was to not only have a proudly lesbian main character, have a same-sex couple treated with the same respect and seriousness as the opposite-sex couples. They got to kiss less, but the creators fought ferociously for every bit of physical intimacy we did get. Even Tara’s death was its own kind of respect, given how Whedon ends literally every other couple throughout his career in similar tragedy. 

This is all a roundabout way of saying that the queer representation in Buffy is both exceptional, brilliant, and also aggressively flawed and insufficient. So while having this representation is a big appeal to queer viewers, I don’t think it wholly explains why Buffy specifically has such staying powers, means so much to many queer people, and continues to appeal so strongly to new and younger viewers today, even though many current shows have better or at least as good queer representation. It would not be enough for the show to simply have queer characters. Rather, the show has staying power because it is a queer show at its core.

Buffy Summers is a queer character from the get-go. I don’t mean that she is canonically queer; I personally read her as bisexual, and the comics have her in a brief relationship with a woman, but looking at the show in isolation and its explicit statements, Buffy Summers is not confirmed as anything other than straight. But what she is, when the show starts, is a teenage girl who has recently discovered that she is different. She is grappling, partially in denial, with a part of herself that she is forced to keep secret. She didn’t choose it, and it totally upends the “normal” all-American life that she thought she was going to have. All of this is a very non-normative, very queer experience.

It’s not just having a secret identity that makes this feel gay. I’m sure there are people out there who have done excellent queer readings of Superman or Batman, but Clark Kent does not stand out as a queer icon in the same way that Buffy Summers does. Most versions of Superman evoke the immigrant and Jewish experiences more - being a story about a man with an ethnic background different to the people around him. But Buffy’s story is about a girl whose own perception of herself and her future is radically changed in adolescence. She is not a secret child of an ancient race known as Slayers. She is just like everyone around her, but in one specific way very different, and that changes her whole outlook. This is not a universal  for queer people during adolescence, but it is an extremely common one.

Buffy’s secret identity is purposefully linked to queerness through dialogue too. Her “coming out” as a Slayer to Joyce in Becoming is the most clear and obvious in this regard. “Honey, a-are you sure you're a Vampire Slayer?” “I-I mean, have you tried *not* being a Slayer?” “It's because you didn't have a strong father figure, isn't it?”

This is not an isolated example, and there are many other moments throughout the show (“I've tried to march in The Slayer Pride Parade” in Dead Man’s Party being perhaps the most on-the-nose use of the allegory) that reinforce this correspondence of being a Slayer and being a Gay. And so queerness becomes baked right in with the premise of the show. Buffy’s experience of being a powerful Slayer while also being hidden and powerless as a teenager, is the experience of being gay and also an invisible and powerless teenager.

If there’s one theme that’s constant with Buffy Summers, it’s the theme of isolation. She is apart from the world in many different ways. She is forced to exist outside of mainstream society because of their refusal to acknowledge a world that very clearly and obviously exists. She feels disconnected from her closest friends, because despite their love for her they cannot understand the specific and unique stresses she is under. And she is dissociated from herself, because of her depression and desire to perform a competency she feels she lacks. Her life is inherently unconventional, and that pushes a girl who already feels alone to a more isolated place, more and more as time goes on.

Being a queer teenager is a profoundly isolating ordeal. To get personal for a moment - I am a bisexual trans girl who grew up in a small town in the 90s and 00s. “Gay” was used universally as a synonym for “shitty”, sitcoms used gay panic as a punchline every other episode, Ace Ventura existed. I knew no out queer people in real life, and any non-straight person in any piece of media was viewed as controversial at best, and more commonly as a dangerous attempt to pervert children’s minds and turn them all into Satanists. My teenage years were a hellish spiral of repression, suicidal ideation, and depression. That’s not a sob story, it’s just how it was. The important part is that it was at this period of my life, that I discovered Buffy the Vampire Slayer. 

To say that this show was important to me would be an understatement. It spoke to me at a time that I was unable to speak truthfully to anyone. I felt understood by this show in a way that I knew nobody in my life would’ve understood me. It was a friend, telling me that I wasn’t the only one who felt like this, and that I could get through it. Sure, that’s not an entirely healthy relationship to a piece of media, but hey, I was not in a healthy mental state. I do genuinely wonder if I would be alive today if I hadn’t found this show. And importantly, my story is not remotely unique or special. I’ve spoken to many other people who have felt similarly, who have felt the show speaks to them on a fundamental level, and have used it to get through difficult times. This series has that power.

I think what Buffy captured so well was the gap between knowledge and communication. The haunting chasm between what you know in your head and what you are capable of saying out loud. She wasn’t just resistant to sharing her secret identity to keep her loved ones secret, she also just lacked the vocabulary to articulate her situation. There is no guidebook to coming out, whether as gay or as a vampire slayer. There was a consistent and conspicuous silence when Buffy interacted with anyone outside her circle, who she wasn’t “out” to. Every adult and authority figure not tied to the supernatural spoke to her with assumed wisdom. Everyone from the spiteful little tyrants like Snyder to the more well-meaning Joyce, they all spoke with a crushing confidence that they totally understood what Buffy was going through, when the reality was that they were totally, woefully ignorant of the reality in front of them. Joyce spoke to Buffy assuming she was a “normal” teenager with the same misplaced confidence she spoke to Willow and Tara with when she assumed they were straight in Buffy vs Dracula. Buffy has a unique interest in those tiny tragedies that stems from these gaps in communication.

Buffy: Mom, that's the last thing that I want, too. I'm trying, I really am. I just... I have a lot of pressure on me right now.  Joyce (patronisingly): Wait till you get a job. Sleep tight.  Buffy (to herself, looking at her hidden stash of gay magazines stakes and holy water): I have a job. - 2x02, School Hard

Importantly, in the case of Joyce and the occasional friendly teacher Buffy would have, this was not out of malice, but due to them just simply not having any consideration towards anything outside their existing frame of reference. There are sadly many queer people out there who suffer with exceedingly shit parents that are more like Tara’s dad, but I think a lot of queer people’s parental experience is closer to Joyce - the straight mother who’s never known any queer person in their entire life, and are totally Not Against That Kind Of Thing, but are shocked that their own child could be anything other than straight. As Buffy and Joyce’s relationship develops, it continues to evoke this idea of a clueless parent trying to understand their child’s “unique lifestyle”, while said child is just too exhausted to be a full-time educator on the subject. Buffy: Mom, what are you doing here? Joyce: I brought you a snack. I thought it was about time for me to come out and watch. Y-you know, the slaying. Buffy: You know, the slaying is kind of an alone thing. Joyce: But it's such a big part of your life, and I'd like to understand it. It's, um, you know, something we could share. Buffy: A-actually, it's pretty dull, you know, it's (distracted) bam boom stick... poof. - 3x11, Gingerbread

And though this repeated tableau is most prevalent in the early seasons, when Buffy is hiding from her mother, it reoccurs throughout the show. Everyone from university lecturers to fast food managers to social workers make assumptions and tiny judgements based on absurdly incomplete information, and Buffy constantly has to tread this line of explaining herself in a socially acceptable way

It’s not just authority figures that Buffy has to hide her Big Secret from, it’s also her peers. Although they show her appreciation in The Prom, for most of the first three seasons, Buffy’s classmates regard her as kind of a freak - a weirdo, an outsider. A whole load of rumours surround her, and Conversations With Dead People confirms even that this included rumours about her sexuality. The only people who she can be comfortable around are the small, tight-knit group of fellow outcasts that she is out to. Said group is made up mostly of other supernatural-adjacent people - a witch, a werewolf, a watcher - who all have different experiences but can understand each other in a way that “normal” people can’t - in the same way that queer kids in real life will gravitate towards each other for solidarity.

Willow and Xander are pretty queer characters in their own regard, and not just because Willow is later confirmed as a lesbian (and a coming out story for Xander was also considered by the writers). In much the same way as Buffy, they are outcasts with difficult relationships with their parents, who find comfort in this small group of similarly misfit people. Just the act of being non-normative and unpopular is kind of inherently queer. Giles in this metaphor takes the form of an elder gay; a man with much more knowledge and experience with the supernatural/queer world, who takes these younger gays under his wing. Cordelia’s S2 arc, realising she is attracted to someone she never thought she would be and losing her old friends because of that, is its own kind of coming out story.

But Buffy is the main character and she is the main catalyst for this queer vision of the show. And you can look at Buffy herself as queer. I mentioned earlier that I personally read Buffy Summers as bisexual, and while that is obviously part personal projection and convenient for my shipping preferences, I think it’s an interpretation that is backed up by parts of the text. Her relationship with Faith is one that plays out very much like an actual fling - subtext that was confirmed by multiple writers and actors as being very intentional. The Faith arc in S3 is structured in a very similar way to the Angel arc of S2 - as a tragic romance, and stuffed full of romantic coding and sexual imagery. It is entirely reasonable to read Buffy as being attracted to Faith - her attraction is canonical, and that attractio being romantic and/or sexual is intentional subtext. There are a few examples in the later seasons too than specifically bring up the idea of other people believing Buffy is queer - Holden in Conversations With Dead People suggests that this was a common belief in high school, and the social worker in Gone assumes that she and Willow are a couple. And then of course there are the comics. It’s an idea that the show does like to return to.

But ultimately, the idea of a queer Buffy Summers works best on a purely metaphorical level - which makes sense for a show so deeply steeped in metaphor. The high school years centre largely on Buffy coming into her own and accepting her destiny as a Slayer. This is of course in many ways a metaphor for coming into adulthood, but since slayerhood is also consistently portrayed as queerness, you can also read S1-3 as Buffy accepting and coming out as gay.

In S1, she pulls away and tries to deny who she is. Queer people coming into their identity is its own kind of Hero’s Journey, and Buffy’s Refusal of the Call in episode one can be seen as a queer teenager repressing their sexuality. One of the hardest parts of coming to terms with a non-normative sexuality or gender identity is realising that the vision that society assumes is a universal happy ending - a cis man and a cis woman in a monogamous marriage with 2.4 children - is something that you are never going to experience. You do not get that life. If you did, it would be inauthentic, a grotesque simulacrum. Buffy is realising the same thing - that the life and future she envisioned for herself is something she cannot achieve. She tries to reject her identity, to ignore her metaphorical queerness and cling to the image of her old life. But as Willow points out in Prophecy Girl, that world is not theirs anymore. The world they live in now is something different, and they must confront that.

S2 shows her coming more fully to terms with herself. She meets another lesbian slayer, and draws comfort from knowing that she’s not the only person like her. Her forbidden and non-normative relationship becomes more intense. And of course, she comes out to her mother at the end of the season. Her forbidden romance with Angel - a  slayer in love with a vampire - is not framed in a way that feels particularly queer, but it remains that any kind of love that is unconventional and viewed as doomed by society always inherently has a tinge of queerness to it. Interestingly, later seasons trade on this idea a little more. Her relationship with Spike in S6 is one that Buffy feels shame over, and when she reveals it to Tara - a lesbian - it is explicitly described as a “coming out”.

But her relationship ends in tragedy, which causes her to leave and abandon her identity. In order to reclaim her name, she must also reclaim her queer identity, as the two are inextricable at this point (“I’m Buffy. The Vampire Slayer. And you are?”). Into S3, Buffy finds herself simultaneously drawn to and pulling away from Faith, a version of herself who has more explicitly embraced her identity as a lesbian slayer. Her flirtation with the dark parts of herself is sub-textually an actual flirtation with another woman, who continually tells her that they are more alike than Buffy says. You can argue about the unfortunate implications of Faith’s hedonism being sub-textually linked with lesbianism, but either way, it’s still there.

We could go on cherry-picking more things that can fit this paradigm, but instead let’s bring the focus back to why this in particular is so resonant to queer viewers. After all, there are other shows with ragtag misfits and secret identities, and to be honest you can apply gay goggles to most media. I think this is where Whedon’s fondness for tragedy, but ultimate hopefulness, transmutes this metaphor into something that really sticks with people. One thing that Buffy is exceptionally good at reminding us is that life really sucks. Profoundly, sucks. Sometimes the worst thing happens at the worst moments. Sometimes all you have are bad choices. Most of the time, life is simply relentless, hard, and cruel. Sorrows come at you in battalions, and nobody around you understands your pain, because they’re so full of it too. S6 obviously springs to mind in this regard, but it’s a core part of the show. Seasons 2 and 3 are slow-motion tragedies that force Buffy into killing someone she cares about. S5 is all about the inescapable coil of mortality and dissociation from reality that comes from living in this absurd world.

“Strong is fighting! It's hard, and it's painful, and it's every day.” - Buffy, 3x10 Amends

“If you could hear what they were feeling. The loneliness. The confusion. It looks quiet down there. It's not. It's deafening.” - Buffy, 3x18 Earshot

“Dawn, the hardest thing in this world is to live in it.” - Buffy, 5x22 The Gift

“Life's not a song. Life isn't bliss. Life is just this. It's living.” - Spike, 6x07 Once More With Feeling

There is an honesty to Buffy the Vampire Slayer that sets it above cosier shows. It opens up the howling abyss that life can often feel like, and shows it to us. But at the same time, it never veers into grimdark or nihilism (in the colloquial sense - it very much does veer into Nihilism in the academic sense). It presents these tragedies as harsh truths, not meant to punish or torture us, but to remind us that we’re not alone in struggling with this. So these moments can also be genuinely uplifting, even as they express a deep negativity. They are comforting without concealing the worst of the world. I picked those four quotes as simply four good examples of the show talking about how much life sucks, and only realised afterwards that all four are also specifically examples of one character talking another character down from killing themselves. The characters help each other through the pain by acknowledging the pain, and so do the same for the audience.

The idea of life sucking but also being worth living is a fairly universal experience to be honest, but there’s aspects to it that are very specific to the queer experience. Queer content tends to have a very upbeat, aggressively positive approach to queerness, for obvious reasons. We are literally fighting for our lives in many countries, and we must be aggressive and clear in our messaging that being queer is great actually and is something we should shout proudly from the rooftops. In media, we are battling against decades of propaganda and forced executions of queer characters, so of course we want to create a bunch of happy and proud gays in response. But the side-effect of that is that it does leave less space to talk about how being queer does kind of suck sometimes. It’s exhausting to have to repeatedly explain and justify your existence to everyone. It’s isolating to have an identity that is not reflected by the heterocisnormative word around you. It’s painful to grow up feeling like your own emotions are incorrect. I am proud of being trans and bi, and I would not change who I am in a million years, but being trans and bi has demonstrably and materially made my life harder. My teenage years were worse specifically because of my gender and sexuality. This is the case for most queer people - it’s life on a higher difficulty setting.

Buffy’s life is made harder because she is the Slayer. Her teenage years are pretty clearly worse than most peoples, because of her metaphorical queerness. But it’s also a source of power, and identity. She is exhausted by it, but also draws strength from it.  This is not dissimilar to the relationship many people have with their sexuality. Especially as we get into seasons 3 and 4, Buffy speaks with pride about being a Slayer - she has moved beyond denying who she is, but the show also acknowledges how stressful and isolating the experience is. It doesn’t let us off easy by treating Slayer powers as either an uncomplicated symbol of empowerment and #girlboss awesomeness, or as a tragic and awful curse. Buffy’s straddling of the Nihilistic tightrope captures the ambivalence that sometimes comes with being queer (or for that matter, being a woman, but that’s a different essay). 

In S5, Buffy decides she needs to learn more about her metaphorical queerness, and asks the elder gay Giles for guidance. She has taken the next step, from accepting her internal self to interrogating it. But the relentless sorrows of real life get in the way of the introspection. She gains understanding of herself and suffering, but she does not achieve nirvana. By the end of the season, she speaks with the fond weariness of someone who is fully confident in who they are, and this point kind of just wants to be left alone. I think of that lovely opening scene in The Gift, where Buffy is disappointed and surprised that the vampire she’s fighting doesn’t know she’s gay a slayer, and kind of shows off about it - but at the end, the guy she saves that she’s “just a girl”, and she just sadly agrees. She is an out and proud Slayer, but she’s also a girl who just wants a sit down and maybe a nap. Honestly, I can relate.

In S6, Buffy’s status as the Slayer has morphed from her main source of angst to just one Thing on the increasing pile of Things that Buffy has to deal with. Again, this is much like the experience many queer people have between adolescence and adulthood. When I was a teenager, my number one all-consuming fears stemmed from my gender dysphoria. Now as I near 30, my government is stripping rights away from transgender people and it’s somewhere in the middle of my current concerns, between “ugh, that bill was a lot higher than I expected it to be” and “shit, I forgot to send that e-mail because I spent half my work day writing a 4000 word Buffy the Vampire Slayer essay”. It is not something that has stopped causing her problems, but it’s just part of her life and who she is now.

The final season charges Buffy with taking care of a bunch of Baby Gays, and impart her acquired wisdom onto them. But she struggles. She has innate knowledge of what her queer life is like, but she cannot verbalise it. It is pretty impossible sometimes to explain a part of yourself to someone who has not experienced that, after all. The only person Buffy is actually able to communicate her specific experiences with is Faith, the only other Slayer, much how there is often an understanding between two trans people or two gay people or two ace people, that often only people with those same experiences can comprehend yours. Eventually, Buffy finds that the only way she can relieve this burden, is to spread her gift, and live in a world where there really are other people like her. She fights through all the difficulties and harshness and judgements, and brings about a better world through owning and sharing her identity.

At the end of the day, Buffy is not a queer show because there are queer characters, or because being a Slayer is often metaphorically linked to being gay. It’s a queer show because it’s a story about feeling alone. A story about having an experience that nobody else can understand, and dealing with that. A story about feeling at war with yourself. It is intimately familiar with uncomfortable silences and incorrect assumptions, with the micro-aggressions of teenage life that are magnified for queer teens and slayers alike. It understands how part of your own identity can be an essential source of strength and a source of stress. It puts a gentle arm around the viewer and reminds them that they’re not alone. It does not whitewash the pain of existence, but in acknowledging it, helps us deal with it. It is existentialist comfort food for anyone who’s ever felt different, or rejected, or isolated. It’s for the queers.

[maccreadysimp]

breaking down this anti-ian article bc it bothers me ( from the child of a bipolar mother and a male teen with same sex attraction ) while also providing valid reasons ian sucks ( from someone who likes ian )

ive had this drafted for a while so i dont think i cover anything from season 11

tw for i^cest and r^pe

he was with a married man

in this point it points out that he was with kash and he continued his relationship with kash even after linda put cameras in the store

“Ian didn't seem to care about how wrong his affair with Kash was or how much it could hurt Kash's wife Linda, whom he saw at the store regularly. “

that is a quote from that part.

ian gallagher was fifteen in season one, kash was an older man who bought him gifts and payed attention to ian ,, that was not on ian , none of that was ian fault because he was a child

ian wasnt open with lip

“ Ian didn't tell Lip about his preferences and forced Lip to figure it out on his own. Lip was instantly accepting of his brother's truth and even offered to help him figure out any confusion he might be harboring, so it's really strange that Ian wasn't just upfront with his closest confidant from the start.”

no , lip wasnt forced to figure it out on his own and he also wasn’t instantly accepting.

in this point it mentions that ‘they’re extremely close ( bestfriends and brothers ) so its strange ian didnt tell him’

like point 1 , ian is a fifteen year old boy, growing up on the southside , and thoughout the show it has mentioned multiple times that the southside isnt that accepting

back to lip -- lip wasnt accepting, sure he was fine but ‘helping your younger brother figure it out’ by having a (female) classmate give him a blowjob isnt helping

he secretly dated his best friends brother

“Most friends have an unspoken rule about not dating each other's siblings, but Ian broke this rule by secretly entering into a relationship with Mandy's closeted brother Mickey.”

the only thing i have to say about this is , he was still with kash and mickey was a boy in his age group who was gay , growing up in the southside ian probably thought he was the token gay so of course hes going to chase after mickey

he stood by as kash attacked mickey

“Ian didn't do anything to stop Kash from shooting his new lover, and didn't even tell the police about his boss' over-the-top display of jealous action so proper justice could be served.”

okay. because two men he had fallen for had gotten into a fight, there was a gun involved and he panicked, in the end after mickey got shot he went to him

now to address the quote, he didnt say anything to the police because he probably knew that that would bring shame onto kash and his family, along with mickey and his family who are very homophobic

oh yeah and it was like 2011 and cops suck and THEY LIVE ON THE SOUTHSIDE

he and lip tried framing terry milkovich

oh the homophobic and racist dad of his boyfriend and bestfriend who tried to kill him and r*ped his daughter ?

yeah , shit man , that was real bad they shouldn’t have done that /s

he dated jimmy-steves married father

“Ian didn't bother telling Jimmy the truth about his father and didn't end his relationship with Lloyd upon finding out that he had a secret wife and family, either.”

at this point ian is probably sixteen but that doesnt matter bc i wont even address that

he met him at a club and then used his relationship with ned to make mickey jealous which was one of the reasons he kept seeing him, he didnt tell jimmy-steve about the relationship or his father bc he shouldnt find out from him he should find out from his father , again like kash, ned was an older man who payed attention to ian and ned later did develop feelings feelings for ian

he stole lips identity to enlist in the army

he enlisted because he didnt know what to do with himself, its implied/stated that the army timeline was the start of his bipolar

“While impersonating Lip, Ian had tried to steal a helicopter and then proceeded to go AWOL.”

this is because of the bipolar he suffers from, it is referenced later in the series after he gets back and hes manic

ian refused to accept being bipolar

of course he didnt accept it, it is made very clear that his family thinks lowly of monica so of course if hes the lucky duck to get what his siblings demonize her for, of course he’ll not want to be it

“He refused to take medications that could alter his personality or mood.”

okay. this is why im making this whole post, this goes along with part 15 ( or so idk ) ,,

my mother , my dear mother, who is bipolar and doesnt take her meds because they are mood altering , my mom doesnt take med because she told me once that they make her feel like shit, she told me that a little after i was born she started taking them but realized she felt nothing, she felt nothing for my dad or for i ( making her numb )

she told me anti deppresents dont help either because when shes on them and manic it pushes her past productive and into angry

my dad told me that when my mom was on bi polar medication she would seem angry most of the time

he wasnt faitful to mickey

“Ian's bipolar disorder made him very reckless and impulsive and led him to be unfaithful.”

lets break that down.

ians. bipolar. disorder.

this plot point i actually didnt like, mainly bc ian never addresses it so ill give the article a point. but then i take away 2 because they have more of a problem with his bipolar messing with him rather than the fact he never apologized and they never worked it out

ian stole yevgeny

before i start quoting i should mention because his boyfriend, who has supported and helped him is suddenly telling him he needs help, he was helping raise yev so he’ll see yev as his own

“Ian failed to recognize just how crazy he was acting...”

cuting you off right there , he was in a bipolar state, he wasnt ‘crazy’ and isnt ‘crazy’

he cant even keep count of his number of partners

just slutshaming i see

he helped throw frank off a bridge

“His relationship with Frank was understandably never the same after that, as Frank struggled to get over this act of betrayal and cruelty.”

‘was never the same after that’ frank never liked ian, ian was probably his least favorite and that point is very apparent

also , it wasnt just ian , his siblings and his boyfriend caleb

he left a healthy relationship to be with mickey

he fell in love with mickey at 15 , mickey was a comfort and always someone to fall back on, when mickey was taken away and no longer in the picture his heart still obviously was with mickey and when mickey came back he didnt know what to do

he told mickey he had a boyfriend but because mickey has been such a constant in his life he finally has back of course he couldnt resist

he liked trevor, i could tell he did but trevor wasnt the one he watched get r^ped by a russian prostitute, he wasnt the one ian was secretly dating bc it would be a death wish other wise, he wasnt the one there when ian was manic or depressive ( at the start )

he tried blackmailing an old client for money

“Instead of raising the money in an honest manner, Ian chose to visit an old client from his time working at the Fairy Tail and blackmail him into funding the shelter.”

because he felt indebted to trevor and wanted to make it up to him, it would have taken longer to do it in ‘an honest manner’ when his sister would have gotten it instead, he knew how much gay youths like he once was needed a safe place

“He grew up wanting to be nothing like his father, but this whole money-making scheme was straight out of the Frank playbook”

because thats all he knows, he grew up with that ‘playbook’ so of course hes going to take a page out of it, he is nothing like frank , franks money making schemes are selfish and for his own greed while ian wanted the money to help build a safe space for lgbt youth

he let fame inflate his ego

of course he did, hes a southside kid who was destined to fail

also it is very apparent that during the gay jesus era he went off his medication which didnt help

“Before long, he just completely forgot about his ex and focused solely on being a deity”

as much as yes, he did let it mess with his head, he was trying to still help lgbt youth and was going against anti gay churchs , in the end it didnt work out for him because he was off his meds and went over board

he stopped taking his meds

see previous point and ‘ian refused to accept being bipolar’

he actually wanted to stay in prison

because he was doing good in there

ian was helping others and was spreading awareness about lgbt with in the prison , and as him and jail scenes go , we can see people were listening to him and he was trying to make it safe sane and consensual

he let down his army of followers

“Ian admitted that most of his actions were completely irrational and the mere results of his bipolar disorder.”

he didnt want to, we can see this, because he knew he would let down everyone, his family were the only ones to ever ground him and they knew it would be the best option for his own mental health

during the gallavich wedding we can see that a lot of his supporters still have his back because they must know how hard it was for him to put all of that success on something he can’t control

he constantly wasted his potential

this is actually the only point in this article i actually agree with , so only 1/20 i agree with

his relationship with mickey wasn’t actually great

“Mickey spent the first several years of their relationship denying his feelings for Ian.”

he was raised by a homophobic and racist father who he knew would react the way he did when terry had caught the two that one day

“Even after he finally embraced his true self, Ian's bipolar disorder kept them from becoming truly happy together.”

yes but mickey was there for him the entire time and helped him through it, he told him he loved him which was really big for him and did his best to care for him

“They couldn't seem to remain faithful to each other for more than a few weeks.”

back to the point about ians bipolar but for mickey he wanted monogamy , now that scene in s11 may say otherwise but it is very clear that he wants a monogamous relationship with ian and ian ( after getting help ) wants one too, and in the later seasons they are monogamous

“When Mickey asked Ian to run away to Mexico with him, Ian refused.”

he wanted to, it’s obvious, but ian has his family and didnt want to abandon them again, i think part of him knew he would see mickey again because they always find eachother, he gave mickey all of his money and wanted mickey to have a good life

“Their relationship was simply never healthy.”

no it wasnt, but thats why the ship is great in its own way, the gay closet kid raised by a homophobic man is obviously going to have a lot of baggage , and ian who is bipolar and struggling with himself will also have a lot of baggage , but in the end they love eachother and that really shows in season five and season seven specifically

that is all lol ,,, this is long sorry

now, i am not a ian apologist , i love ian but hes a dumbass sometimes

actual valid reasons ian sucks

genuinely believes frank is worse than terry

yes frank was definitely abusive but terry is definitely worse ,,

mentally/physically/sexually abusive , the whole nine yards

terry hired a prostitute to r^pe his son , threatened to kill him and ian on multiple occasions , r^ped his daughter who ended up pregnant and is actively racist

frank on the other hand will make gay jokes but in the end doesnt give enough of a shit , he has attacked his children on multiple occasions but not to the brutality that terry has ( this isnt me excusing it )

sorry ian , terry is worse

never apologized

he never apologized for all the shit he put mickey and his family through, never apologized to mickey for cheating on him , never apologized for all the manic and depressive episodes mickey endured with him

never apologized for walking away when he couldn’t handle it, in hall of shame mickey actually acknowledges this saying ‘its youre whole MO’

debbies sexuality

he has constantly made statements saying debbie isnt gay and that bothers me because , why does it care ? as a gay man and as a gay man who soent time with a lot of lgbt youth wouldnt he support his sister even if shes just ‘experimenting’?

in the recent season he doesnt seem to care and doesn’t say anything but it still bothers me

mickey only getting like 80% of his heart

okay look , i get what ian means when he says this , everyones hes been with has made him who he is but fucking hell dude ,, shut up , thats your husband , thats the love of your life you shouldnt be saying shit like that , especially to him

and then this man had the audacity to say mickey probably feels the same about past flings when he knows that ian is the only one hes probably ever been with/serious about

obviously there is probably more but those are the main ones that come to mind

—

before anyone brings up the trans or bi thing im going to explain my thought process for him

like ive probably mentioned multiple times he grew up southside and obviously only ever grew up with lgb and not t ,, trevor did inform him a lot and ian became supre accepting of everyone,, sexual preference isnt transphobic but i do think he approached the matter badly

now the bi thing , legit all i think is that he doesnt hate bisexual people its just that the man he really liked slept with a woman and never expressed any heterosexual attraction so it probably just suprised him and pissed him off because caleb did cheat on ian

—

if you read this far HOLY SHIT THANKS LOL ,, im not adding things that i think are pro about ian this was just me breaking down that article and giving my two cents :)

feel free to message me and talk to me or send me articles like this about any other character/relationship and i will totally break that one down too lol

thanks for letting me rant

[cuckmarston]

in case it wasn't evidential to those in the fandom: the van der linde gang is not a found family. dutch is not the "adoptive father"(though you have the authority to interpret that, if you so desire) of anyone in the gang, he is their employer. nearly everyone in both of his gangs came across him when they were at their lowest, either beaten down by colonization, fleeing from the law, or both.

with hosea's assistance, dutch manipulated the disenfranchised (especially children; arthur at 14, john at 12, lenny around 15, etc.) and molded them into criminals for cash. just because dutch referred to arthur and john as his "favourite sons" does not inherently make them kin. he viewed these two juveniles as useful because they are ambitious, easily exploitable due to having little to no moral compass formed in their youth, and were over all useful.

tw: incest and pedophilia briefly mentioned

despite this, people will insist on harassing those who ship morston in righteousness claim that their relationship is incestual pedophile propaganda. yes, there are the few who seek the possible(not imminent) repulsive aspects of their relationship. i won't deny it, but i am not speaking on behalf of those who indulge in the fetishization of underage content nor pseudo incest. some of you need to acknowledge the fact that your interpretation of a character and their associations are NOT universal.

i've seen unrelated characters refer to a close comrade as "brother" time and time again. as a gay man, i can recognize that the possibility of a character being queer and not having the proper vocabulary to express that is not an extreme or ludicrous concept. i also realize that homophobia was unbearably prevalent in the 1800's and can understand why two men romantically involved wouldn't risk publicly referring to themselves as something society deems unnatural.

in rdr2, arthur and john are two adult men who grew up knowing they are not related to each other, let alone anyone else in the gang. artists are morally permitted to create content of these two adults romantically AND sexually involved: not just with women but possibly even men, including each other. i know the concept really sets some of you gamers on edge but you're just going to have to block the tags or get over it.

i actively ship javier, arthur, charles, and john interchangeably because they are my favorite characters. if this makes you uncomfortable then block me and my art account @tomacabre . don't waste your time on someone who's mind you cannot change. i've seen the ideologies more times then i can count: as far as i'm concerned you're most likely homophobic and hide behind something you believe you can prove is disgusting to the masses.

i, personally, don't ship dutch with anyone because of his power imbalance with EVERY single other person in his syndicate. he is the mob boss and has the ability to turn any of his subordinates against each other if they cross him. we watched it happen in the climax of the story; he was willing to turn his back on his self-proclaimed beloved "sons" in the pursuit of a selfish escape. it wasn't the first time, but it was the last. do not try to bring up dutch ships with me because i'm not fond enough of his character to attempt defending him on any front.

everyone has the right to be uncomfortable with fictional characters, the glorification of those characters, and ships. you need to curate your own space to avoid this. use your ability to block people(or confront them if they are genuinely a problem) and tags instead of spending your time on things you do not enjoy. it is not my, nor any one else's, responsibility to make you feel comfortable on the internet. the best i can do for you is use trigger warnings when applicable to make it easier for those vulnerable to the subject.

[cakebeam]

I'll join you in negativity for a moment. First there was the "Maria is the bestest" of the episode. I'd really hoped the fact her and Alex hadn't shared scenes meant something, like he would call her out, but no. Instead they saved their interaction for the Malex heavy episode so they could shove how okay he is with her down our throats. Second, while loved the Malex scenes it is AGAIN Alex supporting Michael and putting his feelings on the line. After last season I needed Michael to step up.

Honestly nonnie, Monday night's episode put me in such a bad head space I couldn't even enjoy the excitement of Malex finally getting together after years of waiting. The Maria Deluca show no one wanted or asked for has seriously f*cked up all of the storylines and pacing of this season and has made all the character's come across like they're hypnotized in being in love with her when there's no reasoning or explanation as to why they would be when she is still being written to be a selfish, self-centered assh*le and really has nothing to contribute to the group to be actually impressed by.

This propping up of her character has gotten so over the top in being ridiculous, even tv journalists are bringing it up in reviews. It honestly just feels like a version of "the emperor has no clothes", where Maria has nothing special to offer but everyone around her is pretending like she does. Everything she's contributed so far, the other character's could have covered. Quickly. Like in an episode. Certainly not taking up f*cking 8 of them. But Maria Deluca just needed to be front and center to everything despite being a SUPPORTING character and NOT the main character which is Liz Ortecho? It's so unbelievably bad. But not as bad as having Malex hug her before they can actually have their moment. Kind of like when Alex Manes was propping up Maria and calling her his 'dream girl' before getting to talk with Michael. Why is Maria being written as a constant third member of their relationship? And why haven't they brought up the Miluca problem that was the whole reason why Malex was not together in most of season 1 and all of season 2?

There's still so much to say on this and this episode but I'll continue with your other comment nonnie about Michael. Yeah, I'm not happy about Alex having to continuously be the one to share his feelings about Michael and stepping up for Michael when Michael has yet to share his feelings for Alex or do any grand gestures for him (building a bomb to just leave him chained to a radiator ain't it). Yeah he kissed him, ok, he kissed Maria all over the place in season's 1 and 2. That doesn't impress me in thinking this is a cosmic relationship and not just Michael treating Alex like a back up to Maria. He should have been seen REALLY, truly showing Alex he comes first and instead it was Alex doing it for Michael again. I'm not interested in continuing to see a one-sided relationship with Malex, Alex deserves to be chosen first.

I am so f*cking sick of these homophobic narratives that Chris and the writer's are still continuing to write in season 3. Malex is still not being written fairly and will never be until they finally write Michael to put Alex before Maria and actually talk about Miluca because right now the foundation of Malex is just that Maria broke up with Michael and so he chose Alex because she didn't want to be with him anymore and was no longer an option. That's not romantic fam, and the writer's having Michael deeply hug her in this week's episode when we still don't know his feelings about her currently (he has never declared his feelings for her to be dead) and Alex hugging her when she chose herself over his feelings for Michael was f*cked up.