#gonna b sad on here for like 2 seconds but | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

s-4pphics · 1 year

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scent of the pine. 5 (e.w)

*takes off grad cap* alright . here we go.

wc;cw: 17.1k everybody died, sistersbestfriend!ellie, guitarist/producer!ellie, violinist!oc, age gap(three years), all ocs r blackcoded, SMUT!! MDNI!!!, phone sex, masturbation, mean ellie, weed alcohol nics yall know wassup, dubcon, virginity loss, masochism LOL, light bondage, dirty talk, ASSSPLAAAYYY😝, dp, mult. orgasms, subspace and drop, squirting, slapping(face ass tits pussy lol), toys, slight angst but also fluff, just lots of spit n cum

You’ve been very gloomy these past couple of months.

You hadn’t stopped thinking about Ellie since you left her home that morning, up until you and Arya jumped on the train to return to campus.

You’d never be able to express to Arya how much you appreciated her presence: she allowed you to cry, whine, pout, and sniffle about how much you missed Ellie, and she comforted you through all of it with gentle whispers of you’re gonna be fine, bitch! you’re gonna get piped down soon! I promise! Although you felt a bit selfish dumping your girl problems on her, she never made you feel guilty and justified that you always listened to her ramble about her hook-ups and high rambles. The only time she’d ever complained about anything related to your sorrowful monologues about missing Ellie’s laugh and smile and tongue was when you two had to work on your Music & Production Theory assignment (I’m gonna kill you if we fail and you’ll die dickless! Don’t play with me!).

…But other than that, she’s been so sweet!

Ellie has also been keeping in touch ever since you left. She sent you snaps of Duchess zooming around the house, her meals for the day, and three-second voice memos of her new project she was working on. You knew that she’d been flying back and forth to California and had a packed schedule with her producer friends whenever she was there, but your heart couldn’t help but turn gray when you wouldn’t hear from her for a few days.

Now it's March, and you and Arya are sitting on the floor as you glared searing holes into your phone. Ellie sent you a text when you were in class earlier saying that she missed your voice and was going to call you the second she had the opportunity. And you weren’t going to miss it. Ellie was worth wasting your Saturday night on!

“I’m not gonna lie girl,” Arya's voice cut through your intense phone-staring. “I’ve definitely had my dickmatized moments but you’re kinda crazy.”

You looked up at Arya as she carefully packed her blunt to get ready for her smoke sesh with her friends, concerned look on her face. It made you frown.

“What, why? What’d I do?” You asked with your brows pulled down.

And before you could hear her answer, you got a notification. You nearly snapped your wrists at the speed your hands flew to grab your phone to see if it was Ellie, your eyes bulging at your screen, only to see that your sister snapped you. You sighed in slight disappointment before opening it.

You ignored Arya’s snickering.

Your sister sent you a picture of her with hairspray and a lighter in her hand with a caption IM MOVING TF OUT I CANT TAKE THIS SHIT NO MORE BUGS R EVERYWHERE WHAT IN THE FUCK.

You couldn’t hold in your laugh as you snapped her back before Arya stood and went to the bathroom with a change of clothes in hand.

You heard the shower turn on as you got up and onto your bed to mindlessly scroll through Twitter.

After ten minutes of scrolling through a Best Euphoria Character breakdown thread, you got a text from Ellie, and you nearly squealed in excitement.

hiiii im sorry i havent been able to b on my phone like that :( been super busy with this sample

i just wanted 2 let u know that i might have 2 call u another time we still have a bunch of layering to do for this track n we’re on a timer. i miss u so fucking bad

You couldn’t ignore the sadness in your chest, but you texted back understandingly anyway.

it’s ok :( i miss u too. miss ur voice :(

Her reply bubble immediately popped up.

i know baby fuckkkk i miss ur voice so fucking bad im ab to start asking 4 daily voice memos 🤨

You smiled at your screen so wide.

LOOOOOOOL ur annoying

You typed and sent a follow up before she could.

go back 2 work 🥰🥰

kiss :(

mwah

mwah mwah mwah

You put your phone on your chest, and you couldn’t stop the smile that grew on your face. She made you so, so happy.

The bathroom door opened, steam from the warm water exiting the room along with a towel-clad Arya.

“What you cheesin’ so hard for, girl?” She said as she grabbed her edge control off her desk.

“Nothin’,” you said with a dreamy sigh as you stared off past her.

“…Uh huh, I’m heading out soon, I’ll be back late tonight, so don’t wait up.” She said with a smirk.

“Don’t forget to send me your location,” you reminded her.

She let out a quick course, baby before she went back into the bathroom.

You went back to scrolling through Twitter until your eyelids got heavy. A comfortably dressed Arya—she’s definitely getting some— kissed your forehead and dimmed your dorm lights before she left, and you dozed off.

You jolted awake as Rotation blasted in your ears. You drowsily picked your phone up and saw a el:3🌲 and 2:34AM across your home screen.

You perked up immediately to answer, sitting up so fast that you went lightheaded for a second.

“Hello?”

“Hi, you,” Ellie’s light voice rang through the phone. “Were you sleep? M’sorry, we can talk la— “

“No! No, I’m up, I was just napping, hi,” you said as you grinned softly at her laugh, laying on your back. “You’re up late. Did you guys finish?”

“No, but we were exhausted, so we called off for the night. And one of my partners kept rambling about this girl he needed to call, so,” Her voice was already making you squirm. Thank god she couldn’t see you. “But I wanted to talk to you, couldn’t help myself.”

“Oh my god, you’re so obsessed, damn,” you said with a giggle.

“Fuuuuck yeah, sooo obsessed, need to drink your bath water, shit, I think I’m dying!” she said in an overly desperate, dried out tone, making you laugh harder.

Both of your laughs calmed down before she started talking, “I’ve been meaning to ask you something.”

“Yeah?”

“Umm…” She sounded a bit nervous, and it instantly made you antsy. “I know you’re not gonna be back for a couple weeks or whatever, but I just… like I was gonna ask if you wanted to do something, like just the two of us…”

And a sly grin grew on your face. “Ellie… are you asking me out, right now?”

The other line was silent as you heard her move around and sigh before she spoke. “…This was literally the worst way to ask a girl out, fuck, m’sorry— “

You cut through her jittery rambles. “Ellie, stop apologizing! That’s so cute! Of course, I’ll go out with you!”

You heard her release a deep breath as she said, “Fuck, thank god, holy shit, I was so nervous. It’s been so long since I’ve done that. Almost shoved my vape down my throat.”

You laughed as your heart beat quickened. “You really gonna wine and dine me when I come home? We’re that serious?”

“Ohhh, we're that serious, you're eating nothing but lobster and pasta when I see you, swear to god.”

You snorted at her, “Okay, sugar daddy, get me a new car while you're at it. With insurance.”

“Anything you want, baby.” She said with a sleazy laugh.

You hummed at her offer in attempts to mask the pounding of your heart, but she mocked you, humming back at you in a higher tone.

“Shut up! I’m just thinking!”

“Oh, yeah? About what?”

You suddenly felt shy as her voice lowered. It was so much deeper. “Just… just you, I guess, I dunno, miss you.”

You heard her shuffle again before she asked softly, a smirk evident in her tone, “You miss me?”

You let out a quiet, but eager mhm! as your tummy swirled with want.

You listened to her gentle breathing before she asked, “Your roomie home?”

And your heartbeat picked up, your eyes fluttering as your blinking slowed.

“N-no, she’s gone.”

“Then lay down for me, baby.”

You instantly fell on your back, your scarfed head hitting your silk pillows. Your face was boiling hot, “I am.”

“You sound nervous, you good?” she asked you gently.

“M’great, just… yeah, I’m okay, want you to keep talking.”

“Stop me whenever, you understand?” Her tone was much more serious, and it made your thighs clench, your boyshorts growing wetter.

You whined out a uhhuh!, but she corrected you immediately, “Say you understand.”

“I understand! I get it, El!” Fuck, you wished she were here to touch you. To scold you in person.

You heard giggling and more shuffling around through the speaker, “You gotta shirt on?”

“Mhm.”

She chuckled lightly, “Take it off, take off everything while you're at it.”

Your heartbeat spiked, “But Arya might come back.”

“That’s why you have a blanket, honey.”

…Fair.

You quickly set your phone on your pillow, reaching for the hem of your shirt, lifting it up to pull it over your head, tossing it to the floor. You arched your ass up to pull your boyshorts off and kicked them to the foot of your bed. You reached for your phone again.

“Okay, m’ready now.”

“Such a cutie,” she cooed at you. You could hear the grin through her words. “Gonna make you cum so hard the second I get my hands on you.”

You whimpered into the speaker as your walls squeezed. Fuck, fuckfuck.

“You make me go fuckin’ crazy, can’t stop thinking about you.”

“M-me, too.”

“Yeah? What d’you think about?”

Say it! your brain yelled at you. She already knows you’re a slut, just say what you want!

“...Umm…”

“Talk to me, baby, about anything you want.”

You gulped, heart pounding in your ears, “Your… your hands? They’re… really nice.”

“Yeah? What about ‘em is nice?”

“Ellie…”

“Like when they touch you all over, when they hold you down?”

“Yes,” you barely whispered as your free hand traveled down your body. Not touching anywhere specifically, just roaming.

“Know you do, they get you so fuckin’ hot,” She breathed through the line. “Wanna touch yourself?”

“Yeah, w’na so bad.”

“Say please.”

“Ellieee— “

She cut off your embarrassed whines with a nastily casual tone, “I'll hang up right now. Ask nicely.”

You balled your traveling hand up in a fist as you pleaded with an upset pout, “Please, Ellie.”

“Please what.”

“… Please help me?”

“….”

“C’mon Ellie! Please make me cum! I wanna cum!”

Her condescending laugh pierced through your ears, “Touch those pretty fuckin’ tits since I didn’t get to before you left.”

You moaned out as your pointer finger and thumb rolled your stiffened nipple as you squirmed.

“They’re so fucking sensitive, got my sheets so wet when I played with ‘em. Wan’em in my mouth again, shit.”

You pulled at your other nipple, and you let out a moan into the speaker.

“You’re so fucking beautiful, miss you so fucking bad.”

“Miss you so much, Ellie, can’t wait t’see you.” You cried out quietly. Your pussy was clenching with need.

“Touch your pussy, babygirl, rub your clit. Get it nice and wet f’me.”

You followed her instructions at a lightning speed, spreading your legs wider and reaching your hand all the way down to bring your slick to your clit. Your breathing picked up as you slowly rubbed it into your bud, hips jerking.

“Tell me how wet it is,” you could hear how shaky her voice was getting, breathing labored. She was touching herself to you touching yourself, and it was making you wetter. It made you burn. It made you want to get her there.

“M’really wet, El,” you mewled out to her, trying to ignore your bashfulness.

“Yeah? S’dripping on your bed like it did on mine?”

“Shit, yes, I feel it.”

“Fuuuck, bet it’s so fucking tight, gonna break that pretty pussy in so good.”

“Want you to. Want you inside me s’bad, please.”

“Gonna give you whatever you want, promise, shit.”

You felt that feeling coming over you before you could think, “Think m’gonna cum, baby—“

“Already? Always cum so fucking quick—“

“I-I just miss you!”

“Then cum for me, love.”

“G’na, daddy!” You heard her groan at the name.

“Fuuuuck!” You heard the wet sounds from her pussy over her groans and whines of your name, and that swelling feeling in your gut exploded.

All you could get out was a garbled cumming! as your thighs shook in your pleasure, your fingers quickly rubbing your clit as your hips bucked towards the friction. It felt so much better because you knew she was listening.

“Don’t fucking stop, you’re gonna cum again.” She scolded when your fingers slowed and your breathing slowed.

“E-Ellieee—!”

“You wanted to cum so bad, right? Then fucking cum, fuck that pussy,” she must’ve been close: her breathing was heavier and shaky, the wet sounds from her side increasing.

You put your phone on speaker and set it on your pillow, propping yourself up on your elbow so you could fuck yourself easier. You’ve never successfully made yourself cum like this, but you slid your middle finger in experimentally anyway. You released a light gasp at the stretch. You were so soft and slippery on the inside, your clit twitching as you wiggled around in search for that spot that Ellie found so easily.

“D-Do me a favor?” she gasped out to you.

“U-Uh huh?”

She let out a breathy laugh, “Put your pussy on the phone so I can nut?”

You laughed with her, shaking your head as you grabbed it with your free hand. You placed it between your legs, thrusting your finger in and out, “Can you hear it?”

“Yeah, babe, fuck.”

You let out a moan with her, slowly fucking yourself and bringing your other hand over to rub your clit, hips jolting at the sensitivity. You both were moaning each other's name as you chased your pleasure in unison. You let out a loud moan when you prodded that squishy spot that made you black out the last time you saw Ellie. You hit it as hard as you could, pussy squelching around your fingers and belly swirling.

“Gonna make me cum, shit, sounds so fucking hot,” she whined out in between heavy pants.

“Cum with me, El? Please?” You rubbed your clit faster.

“Gonnagonna, fuck, m’so close—!”

You let out a shout of her name as it hit you, your fingers trapped between the tight grip of your walls. You rubbed your clit as you grinded into your pussy, your head falling back as your hips rocked back and forth to ride it out. You tried to quiet your wails as Ellie came with you, letting out obscenities while she talked you through it. You could hear how fast her fingers were moving and it made another wave wash over you, your cunt giving one last bone-crushing squeeze as its twitching calmed.

You pulled your drenched fingers out and slowly rubbed your clit as you came down, listening to Ellie’s quieting gasps of pleasure. You reached to grab a couple tissues from your work desk, wiping your fingers and pussy before grabbing your phone to set on your pillow. You heard her shuffle before she spoke.

“You okay, babe?”

“Yeah… wish you were here,” you answered with a pout.

“I know, a couple more weeks’n I’m all yours.”

“S’all I’m thinking about,” you said gently. “Go get some rest.”

“Don’t want you to gooooo,” you heard her pouting. It made your heart skip. “Stay on the phone with me?

“Don’t you have to get up early tomorrow?”

“…Yeah…”

“Right. You had a long day, go to bed.” Even though the sound of her breathing would lull you to sleep faster, you could only imagine how drained she must’ve been.

“Fine,” you heard her sigh in resignation.

“Sleep well,” you cheesed widely.

“I’ll try, promise. Mmmmwaaah!” she sent a goofy kiss through the speaker. You sent one back.

“Night, El.”

“Night, baby.”

You hung up your line, throwing your phone on your pillow as you sat up to go to the bathroom.

You missed her scent so much.

Your sister was very in love. And lonely.

It’s been almost three weeks since she’s seen Isaiah.

She was typically good at keeping her sneaky links on the low, only calling them to fulfill her needs in the middle of the night, buy her drinks, smoke her the fuck out whenever she wanted, but she never expected to miss one of them or wait for their calls. Fuck time zones!

When Isaiah and your sister first started hooking up, it started off normal. Quick, but nastily satisfying fucks in hotel rooms (that he paid for, city girl shit), smashing in his rental car before his studio session, in her car before she went to work; it was strictly sexual for months, and she was fine with him constantly flying back and forth!

Until he returned from California with a new strain that he said reminded him of her. She damn near bought a ring to propose to him herself. He smoked her out, she had one of the best highs of her life, and he gave her the craziest head on her couch, how could she not want him?!

And now he’s gone, making beats in California again as she sat and thought about his voice. His scent.

Why did California always keep the most important people away from her?!

Thinking about that city always gives her a headache. She ignited the packed bowl of her pipe, staring holes into the black screen of her phone as she waited for his call.

You were editing another compilation of you playing all four seasons of Vivaldi as Arya snored on your shoulder. Your subs were going to eat this one up!

The train Wi-Fi was kicking your ass and was this close to fucking up your render, but you were managing.

You stretched your wrists, and you leaned back from your small tray table, resting against your head against the rest and grabbing your phone.

You got a text from Ellie!

hiiiii baby can’t wait 2 c u

got smth cute planned :)

You didn’t notice the smile that spread on your face as you typed.

so excited :( wanna smell u so bad

You were about to set your phone down, but a text bubble popped up.

yeah? wna smell u too

gonna shove my nose in that pussy and inhale 😛

IMMA EAT IT RAAAHH

Your entire body flushed hot as you shook your head.

AYOOOOO??

UR FUCKDIGNNSTUPIDD GET OFF MY PHONE

LFMAKOAAOOAAO

kissie b4 i go? :(

mwahmwahmwah

mmmmmwwah

You set your phone down as you cheesed dumbly.

You wished this train would hurry the fuck up!

Your mom had come to pick you and Arya up from the station with slices of her freshly baked pineapple upside-down cake, kisses, and strong hugs. You never got used to being away from her months at a time; You'd missed her warm embrace so much.

You had a couple of days to yourself before you and Ellie's first date and… just thinking about it made your heart beat faster.

She’d texted you when you got home, telling you to dress up in something fancy. Would she buy you a fancy dinner? Take you to an art gallery? A night on the town in the city? The possibilities were endless with her!

Arya had been telling you that you needed to buy some… things for when the two of you get “freak nasty”, so she offered to drive you to the mall (no more fruit panties, you're an adult now!, she’d scolded you). While you were excited for what happened after your date, you didn’t want it to be narrowed down to that; You loved spending time with Ellie. You just got her back in your life, and you wanted to appreciate every moment that you could get with her when she wasn't working. You felt so happy when she was around.

… But of course, Arya wasn’t hearing that.

“Girl, you can save all that sappy shit for the wedding, do you want crotchless panties under your—“ She paused her waving of the… very exposed pair of pink underwear as she remembered something. “Oh fuck, you don’t have a dress!”

“…I was thinking about just wearing my prom dr— “

“Don’t even finish that fuckin’ sentence, are you serious?! Your prom dress? On your first date? You needa be slapped for that!” She said, irritated as she glared at you. You glared back at her attitude, now just as annoyed.

“What do you expect me to do?! I’m not… I’m not like you guys, okay? This typa shit is easy for y’all. You know how hard it is for me to… do things like this. Why do you think I’ve been single this whole time?!” You said with a hurt frown.

You knew she never meant any harm whenever she scolded you about your romantic situations, —or lack thereof—but that didn’t mean it hurt your feelings any less. You’re just starting to come into yourself and your appearance, and you need her, and everyone else, to be patient with you.

Arya must’ve sensed the pain and discomfort in your voice because her glare slowly fell, a gentle replacement immediately overtaking her expression. She set the panties back down onto the display table and grabbed your shoulders.

“M’sorry babe, okay?” She said softly, and you nodded as you looked off into the distance in rigid forgiveness; You knew she didn’t like that. “Look at me.”

Your eyes slowly met hers before she quietly spoke. “I’m sorry, I want the best for you, that’s all.”

She continued as your eyes watered. Just a little glisten! “You’re such a beautiful person—inside’n out and I want you to feel that way, even more so now because of that dick-slangin’ girlfriend of yours!”

“You’re annoying,” you joked as you laughed quietly, making her smile.

“It’s true! You’re my baby’n I love you.”

“Love you,” you mumbled into her shoulder as she pulled you into a tight hug, pressing a light kiss to the side of your head before pulling back.

She spun around and pointed towards the 30% off on all thongs! sign at the front of the store.

“Can you buy one, at least?” she said in half-joking exasperation, pout on her face.

“…Sure,” You relented with a sigh. “I might not wear it for the date, though!”

“That’s fine, mama! Just wanna make sure you got one for safe keeping!” She said slyly as she stuck her tongue out.

You shook your head as you made your way over to the rack, eyeing the pine green thong on the mannequin.

Two days passed and you were getting ready for your first date! You couldn’t believe it!

After Arya drove the two of you to the airport to pick up Kris and Starr, they’d spent the night at your place so they could see you off before Ellie came to pick you up.

Starr helped you wax your eyebrows and legs: she offered to wax your cooch, but you were scared and a little embarrassed at the thought of your friends seeing you so… exposed. You knew your friends didn’t care about seeing you naked, but you were still a bit sheltered with them. I’ll stick to my razor! you'd said.

Kris was pressing your hair while Arya helped you glue your lashes on as you frantically checked the time with a bouncy knee. 6:33… 6:34… 6:36!

Even though Ellie said that your reservation was at seven-thirty, you still needed to get dressed, had to count for the drive, potential stops for gas… and what if there was an accident on the road and it made you both late… oh, god what if you both caused the accident—!

“Bro, can you calm the hell down— “

“Y’know, I’m getting really sick of y’all asking the girl with anxiety to calm down—!”

“Stop moving and hold your ear down!”

You thanked god your mom was out on a wine night; She didn’t need her night ruined with you and your friends bickering.

You grabbed your ear in a tight downward pinch with a harsh sigh, moving it so Kris could straighten your baby hairs. Even with all this frantic movement from everyone in the room, they made it clear that they didn’t want you to see your final look until the very end, blocking all mirrors available with their bodies.

After fifteen minutes of… pure chaos, your hair laid flat, and your face was beat. You pressed kisses all over your friends’ faces with breathy iloveyouthankyou’s before grabbing your dress and undergarments to sprint to your bathroom, making sure not to look at yourself even though you desperately wanted to.

You shut the door with a deep and heavy exhale. You looked at your dress with pounding in your ears: it was a floor length, black velvet maxi dress with lace detailed sleeves. It accentuated your bust so a little cleavage was showing (I, personally, would have my nipples out, but this is cute, too! you recalled Arya saying in the dressing room); It was so… classy. You felt like an adult when you tried it on. You hope Ellie likes it.

You shook off your insecurities before they could terrorize you and removed your tee, underwear, and sweatpants. You put your pine green, lacy strapless bra on with the thong to match, adjusting it so… your pussy could fucking breathe how do people wear this shit everywhere they go!

You grabbed your dress and stepped into it, carefully pulling it up and over your shoulders. You straightened it out with your hand, making sure no wrinkles were in it before you took a breath, opened the door, and walked out to your bedroom.

Starr was the first one you made eye-contact with and she damn near fell out of your desk chair and onto the floor. Your eyes widened as the other two turned with excited gasps and shrieks.

“OH MY FUCKIN’ GOD WHAT THEFUCK—!”

“You’re so fucking fine, holy shit—!”

“If it don’t work out with ol’ girl, you know where to find me—!”

You shook your head at them before dropping your gaze to your floor so that they couldn’t see your small smile, your face flushed, “Okay, okay, can I look now?”

“Yeah baby, turn around!” Kris said excitedly as she grabbed your shoulders with an encouraging squeeze.

You spun around and was immediately met with someone who… did not look like you. At all. Even your brain was too stunned to speak. What the fuck?

The girls' excited expressions slowly dropped when they witnessed your shocked reaction, but you weren’t upset at all. Just… surprised. In a good way.

“What’s the matter, honey?” Kris asked you gently from behind with concerned eyes, meeting yours in the mirror.

“…I’m just really— “

THROW IT IN ROTATION! (THR—)

You jumped towards your phone on your dresser, nearly knocking your lamp off it. You answered immediately when you saw who it was.

“Hello?”

“Hiiiii, m’downstairs!” Ellie said giddily, and your spirit brightened. You smiled widely, and the girls followed.

“I’m coming down right now, just needa put my shoes on!”

“Ok, is it fine if I come in for a sec or?”

“Yeah, it’s fine. The girls wanna meet you!” And they nodded eagerly in agreement.

“… Fuck, now I’m scared.”

“Don’t be! They’re so sweet, c’mon.”

“K, gimme a sec, mmmmmwah!” she said goofily, you sending one back just as dopily before you ended the call.

“Y’all gay as shit,” Starr said with a headshake, making the other girls snicker and jump in excitement.

You, heels in hand, and your friends nearly jumped down the staircase to rip the front door off the hinges.

The minute your eyes connected with Ellie’s, you had to stop yourself from dropping to your knees and doing something crazy. Fuck.

She was dressed in an all-black suit with a… fucking turtleneck underneath her jacket. Her sleeves were rolled up so her forearm tattoo was exposed. She had…Cuban links around her neck and wrists. Her hair was cut into a mullet—when the fuck did that happen, holy shit?!— and the two slits in her brow were more prominent. You noticed one of her hands was behind her back, but you couldn’t even bring yourself to care about what she was hiding. You were, by all means, ready to fuck right now. You nearly said fuck the date.

And by the darkening of her eyes as she took you in from head to toe, you could tell she was ready, too.

“…Hey,” she said to all of you, but she kept eye contact with you. You stared back.

“Hi! Nice to finally meet you, I’m Arya,” your best friend interrupted as she stuck her hand out towards your date. Her eyes left yours to politely greet your friends with cute smiles and handshakes.

And then she turned to you, bringing her hidden arm around to hand you a burgundy sunflower wrapped in gold and pink ribbons and plastic. Evening sun!

She stepped inside and into your space—she always smelled so fucking good! — as you took it from her hand with a gentle thank you. Her cheeks were so red as she whispered back of course before planting a soft kiss to your lips. You heard your friends squeal quietly. Neither of you cared, sucked into your own little universe.

“Ready?” she whispered. You nodded excitedly with a toothy grin, stepping into your heels. She smiled back before taking your hand in hers.

“Oh fuck, wait a second!” Kris said loudly before running upstairs. You looked at your two friends, confused. Starr smirked as Arya shrugged.

Kris came running back down the stairs with a small backpack in her hand, giving it to you.

“Packed you some… things. Might not see you for a few days,” she said slyly as she winked, causing Starr to snicker. What the hell was in this bag?

“Be careful with our little baby, now! She’s fragile!” Starr called out.

“Will do, don’t worry,” Ellie replied with a light laugh before turning to you to whisper, “C’mon, baby.”

“Don’t forget to lock the door before you guys head out, keys under the mat,” you turned to say to your friends as you slowly walked out. “I love y’all!”

Shouts of love you! and be safe! rung through your ears before you gently shut the door. Your back was immediately pressed up against it before you could think, Ellie craning her neck to connect your lips in a hot kiss. Your knees went weak.

She pulled away before you could protest, looking you up and down, “Had to do that, fuck, you look gorgeous.” Your cheeks were so hot as you mumbled a quiet you, too!

“Think I’m gorgeous?” She hummed out with a small smile. You saw her cheeks shine a darker shade of pink.

You nodded with an mhm!, wrapping your arms around her neck to pull her in for another kiss. She grabbed your forearms and moved back with a shake of her head.

“Okay. No more bullshit, we’re classy tonight!” She said with a clap of her hands.

“Just one more,” you shook your head with a pout as you attempted to move her closer.

You shut your eyes when you saw her face move closer to yours before you heard her whisper a no against your lips.

“C’mon, we’re gonna be late,” She said with a foxy grin. She took your hand in hers to lead you to her… sleek ass car, fucking shit!

The heartbeat in your ears nearly deafened you.

The restaurant was… impeccable. You thought Cheesecake Factory was fancy; They were nothing compared to this spot. It was dimly lit, crystal chandeliers hanging from the ceiling, tables draped in a black cloth, marble plates, candles, bottles of champagne… This is wealth!

Ellie hadn’t let your hand go the entire car ride, all the way up until you reached the front desk to confirm your reservation. You both were led to an exclusive spot on the second-floor outdoor balcony so that the two of you were alone. You teared up at the sight in front of you.

Your small section was filled with lit lanterns, the decorative trees around your table wrapped in fairy lights, and your table was surrounded with rose petals. There was even a small flowerpot with an evening sun sticking out of it. The gesture was so simple, but your eyes watered with gratitude. You couldn’t believe she organized this for you.

“Like it?” She sounded so nervous next to you. You turned to face her and nodded with a sniffle.

“Such a crybaby, jesus,” she mumbled with a shaky laugh, reaching towards a napkin on the table to hand to you. You dabbed your eyes, minding your liner.

“This is so sweet, Ellie, oh my god,” you watched her expression fill with affection and doting before she pulled you in to kiss your forehead as she led you over to the table.

She grabbed the back of your chair to pull it out for you with an over-exaggerated call of m’lady!, ushering you to sit down. You laughed wetly before you sat with a thank you!

“I wasn’t joking when I said you can get whatever you want,” She stated as she circled the small table to get to her seat. “I’ll buy this place out if you ask, don’t give a fuck.”

Fuckfuckfuck—!

“Ellie, this is prettiest place I’ve ever fucking been in, oh my god!” You said as you glanced around the room.

“Ehhh, it’s alright,” she said with a cocky smirk, shrugging as she shook her jacket off her shoulders. You tried not to look at her toned arms too closely as you rolled your eyes. “Want some wine?”

“Is… is that allowed?”

“… It is tonight, shit— “

A man dressed in a black shirt, slacks, and apron cut her off with an introduction as your server, bowing his head in greeting. You noticed how he kept returning his gaze to you as he described the specials, but you paid it no extra mind.

After Ellie asked for the most expensive wine, the server departed with a stiff nod in her direction. You noticed her intense gaze as she watched him leave.

“You okay?” you asked gently. She silently shook her head yes before reaching out to you to grab your hand, playing with your fingers.

Hm. That was weird.

Dinner was fucking incredible. Shrimps should’ve never been called the “roaches of the sea”, they tasted too good!

You were two glasses of wine in, —nursing your third—and you were starting to feel warm and fuzzy, a smile permanently painted on your face as Ellie went on about astrology; You didn’t know what the fuck a mercury retrograde was, but you supported anything that kept that impassioned look in her eyes! She looked so excited!

“—that fucker thought that because I’m a fucking Libra I wasn’t gonna say anything. Like, I literally have an Aquarius rising, you cunt! I’ll fuckin’ run you ov— “

“How’s everything?”

You looked to your side and made eye contact with your server, you sipped from your glass as you eagerly nodded, “Oh my god, it was fucking incredible. Who knew shrimps could be that goddamn huge! Are we allowed to say bad words in here?!”

He laughed while nodding, “Yes ma’am, you’re allowed to do whatever you want in here. Would you like any dessert with the rest of your wine?”

“Yes, please!” You got giddy at the mention of sweets, “I saw this chocolate molten lava cake lookin’ thing on the menu, but there was no ice cream on top. Can y’all… à la mode it?”

“Course we can, the Chocolate Fondant with ice cream!” He said as he pulled out his notepad from his apron pocket, scribbling before turning to Ellie. You noticed how tense she looked: she was sitting back in her chair with her legs crossed, her finger tapping on the arm rest, and her shoulders were stiff. You didn’t comment on it, but something was off. “And for you?”

She didn’t answer, and her lack of response concerned you. You reached over to gently place your hand on top of her… clenched fist on the table, “El? You don’t have to get a whole one. You wanna share with me?”

She hadn’t looked at you since he arrived, though: she continued to glare at the waiter, and when you turned to look at him, you saw him glare at her. What the hell?

“We’re gonna get that to go, actually.” She demanded, her gaze sharp like knives. You recognized that tone of hers instantly. She was this close to swinging. Oh no.

“I think that would be best. Cash or card?” He snarked. You whipped your head to glare at his tone.

You felt the table shake as Ellie moved to stand. You jumped up and stood in front of her—almost breaking your damn ankle in these heels— before she could lunge at the waiter, letting out soft warnings of nononono as you blocked her off. This was an elitist establishment; you’re not trying to get arrested! The waiter scoffed and stomped off.

You watched Ellie seethe in her chair as she pulled her wallet out of her slack pocket, throwing a stack of hundreds on the table before grabbing her jacket. She wrapped her hand around yours before pulling you towards the restaurant's staircase.

She harshly pushed the doors of the restaurant open to lead you to the parking garage. You weren’t having it, though.

“Ellie! Ellie, wait! What the hell just happened?” You asked, grabbing her wrist with your free hand to stop her pacing.

“Doesn’t matter— “

“Yes, it does!” You said louder as you yanked your hand from hers. You grabbed her flushed face in your hands, but she wasn’t looking at you. She just continued to whisper obscenities under her breath.

“Baby, look at me please, talk to me,” you said gently, rubbing her cheeks with your thumbs in an attempt to soothe her.

She finally looked down at you, before looking around again, “Let’s get in the car first, c’mon.”

You released her face from your grasp with a nod, letting her guide you.

She let out a deep sigh when she shut her door. You leaned over to rub her knee comfortingly.

She looked down at your hand as her expression softened, “M’sorry, I— “

You shook your head, “It’s okay, just, what was that? I’m so confused right now—”

“Motherfucker wouldn’t stop glaring at me, pissed me the fuck off,” She said between grit teeth. “Kept lookin’ at you, the fuck was he smiling so hard for anyway—“

“A-at me?”

“Yes, at you,” She said like it was obvious. Your brows furrowed in confusion. “The bastard almost broke his neck trying to show you the menu, ohhh of course I'll put ice cream on the chocolate fountain, sexy, I'll make sure the chocolate’s extra hot for you, like what the fuck— “

You couldn’t hold in your laughter at her exaggerated impressions, and you felt her relax as she scoffed a laugh out. You watched as she reached into her jacket pocket and pulled out her mint vape, pulling from it. She turned her head to blow the smoke away from your face. You leaned over the center console, grabbing the side of her face to turn towards you. You planted soft kisses to her cheek in between your chuckles as she shook her head, licking her chapped lips.

“Dinner was really good,” you said in between kisses.

She hummed before she sighed, “Sorry I ruined it, you didn’t even get your chocolate fountain.”

You giggled, “Fondant, baby.”

She grumbled out a whatever, making you laugh harder, “I had so much fun, El, love spending time with you.”

She turned her face towards yours to whisper, “Me too babe. Missed you so much.”

“You smell so fucking good,” you whispered against her mouth before you could think.

“Yeah?” You felt her smirk.

You hummed in agreement before pressing your mouth to hers. She instantly reciprocated, turning her body so she could place a hand on the back of your neck to pull you closer. The kiss deepened, her tongue swiping against your bottom lip before she sucked on it. You let out a whine when her tongue licked into your mouth. Tongueringtongueringtongueri—

But then she pulled away. You followed her mouth with yours, making her smile.

“Let’s go home.”

You nodded so hard, you almost snapped your neck.

The minute you stepped foot into Ellie’s place, her mouth was on yours.

Her strong hands were gripping your hips, your arms around her neck as you moaned in her mouth.

Jinglejinglejinglejingle—

You pulled away from her and turned the second you heard Duchess coming, her small, fluffy body descending the stairs. You pushed Ellie’s grabby, traveling hands away.

“Baby! Oh my god! I missed you so much!” You squealed in excitement as you rushed over to her as quickly as your heeled feet would allow. She started purring and rubbing against your leg. You bent over to pet her little head as she nuzzled into your hand.

“You really chose her over me, wow, okay,” Ellie called out from behind you as you heard the fridge open along with some clinking glass.

Of course, Duchess’s demons took over as she whipped her head off into the distance, seemingly shocked by something, before sprinting back upstairs. There had to be a ghost or something in this bitch!

You shook your head before standing straight to turn towards the kitchen. You noticed Ellie shamelessly staring at your ass before she slowly dragged her eyes up connected with yours. And she just took a shot of pure vodka. No chaser. Fuck.

“You always talk about me staring, look at you!”

“You’re lucky that’s all I did,” She said as she poured another shot for herself. “Was thiiis close to doing something outta pocket.”

“Oh yeah? Like what?” you challenged. Yup, that wine was still kicking.

“Shoving my tongue in your ass,” she said casually with a shrug before leaning over the counter, taking sips from her shot glass.

That familiar swirl in your gut quickly turned into a tornado. Your pussy clenched tight with want. Oh. Oh, wow.

“Oh.”

“Uh huh.”

Do something! Say something sexy, you’re boring her! your brain shouted.

“T-that guy was trash, huh?” you said with a sheepish laugh.

“…Yup,” she said deeply as she watched you. Every breath you took, every nervous twitch of your body with that nasty little glint in her eyes. The one you recognized from New Year’s. You stepped out of your heels and took a stumbly step towards the counter.

Confidence! Confidence, dammit!

“Can I have some?” You said as you pointed towards the bottle of Absolut.

She snorted a laugh before shrugging, “I dunno. Can you?”

“Shut up, gimme some,” you said as you folded your arms over your chest. Her eyes dropped to your tits as she licked her lips; She wasn’t moving to get your drink, she just stared at your pushed up breasts. Your manicured nails dug into your lacy sleeve, but you stood your ground. “Right now.”

She smirked at your tone before returning her gaze to yours, shaking her head no. She tilted her head condescendingly, lifting her brow at you. She was… fucking testing you! The goddamn nerve!

“Ellie.”

“Hm?”

“Pour me a shot!”

“Or what?” Her tone was so low, so relaxed. You could feel yourself getting so wet.

“Or m’gonna…” Come up with something, what the fuck! “M’gonna…uh… fight you!”

“…You’re gonna fight me?” She squinted her eyes at you, setting the small glass down on the counter before folding her hands.

“…Yeah! Y’know what?! I’m actually mad, you ruined our first date because you thought some guy was staring at me!” There was a shakiness in your voice, but you waved your arms in anger as you started pacing, your bare feet stomping on the dark tile. Along with soft jingles. Duchess was back! “I’ve never been stared at by a stranger in my life!”

Ellie wasn’t retaliating, but you noticed her jaw clenching. It made you clench, but you pressed anyway.

“And you didn’t even get me my dessert! Maybe I wanted him to stare at me! Maybe I wanted the attention, for once! For fucking on—!”

You hadn’t noticed Ellie circle the counter during your toothless rampage, but you felt a sharp tug of hair at the back of your head. Your neck forcibly craned up at her as you let out a wet gasp and pained whined, your fist clenching in your shock and… arousal. Your eyes met her dark, fiery ones, her lips slightly parted as her breath hit your face. You couldn’t stop fucking squirming, your thighs rubbing together to ease the sudden tightness of your core.

“Don’t start acting like a fuckin’ brat,” She said lowly between grit teeth. “You’re cute, keep it that way.”

Despite your eagerness for… her everything, you spat back, “S-Screw you, Ellie! You’re mean!”

“Know I am. Seems like you don’t, though.”

Your body involuntarily shuddered against her, and you mentally cursed yourself for being your biggest enemy! Your tough act faltered the second you put it on, and she smirked. “So fuckin’ easy, you wanna screw me, baby?”

You were easy. You were, you were, all for her! Fuck, you’d do anything she asked of you. You hadn’t even realized that your hands were slowly lifting your dress up on their own accord, bunching the fabric around your hips. She looked down and scoffed out a laugh, her grip in your hair tightening. You were moaning aloud already, what the fuck!

“Givin’ it up like that? Like a filthy slut?”

You nodded, your head filled with nothing but desire. Need. Instinct. You needed her to fuck you right now!

“Get up those fucking stairs, gonna put the baby in the guest room.” You could hear her jingling on the couch.

Her grip on you loosened as she backed away to walk towards Duchess with a soft hi, baby! missed you!

That was a fast switch up!

You turned towards the counter and downed the rest of Ellie’s discarded shot before you bolted up the steps. You never ran so fast in your life.

After Ellie took care of Duchess, you heard her tread up the stairs. You were sitting on the edge of her made bed with your hands folded in your lap and slick pooling your thong. She met your eyes from where she stood by the top of the steps.

“Look at you, already so well behaved,” she cooed at you. She sounded so demeaning, and you loved it. You were so embarrassed that you did.

You didn’t reply but watched her slowly walk towards you. Your breathing picked up and your heart pounded in your ears and head and clit—

“You used to be so fuckin’ sweet,” she said down at you, her lustful eyes twinkling under the green and blue hues in her room. She shook her head at you. “You get some alcohol in you’n start acting out? That’s what you wanna do?”

You slowly shook your head no, jutting your bottom lip out.

“Talk.”

“No, Ellie,” you could barely whisper.

“Take this off,” she ordered abruptly, her pointer finger pulling at the bust of your dress.

You stood at her command, pulling your arms out of your sleeves to pull the dress down your body. Was it always this tight?!

After wrestling with your garb, it pooled at your feet. You stepped out of it clumsily as Ellie took in your appearance. You watched her rake her eyes over your body, chuckling softly at your undergarments.

“These are cute,” she said as she snapped the band of your thong against your skin. It made you flinch… and wetter! “Give’em to me.”

Your breath hitched, curling in on yourself slightly.

She gently cut through your thoughts before you could gather them, “Don’t think about it, just do what I ask.”

You hesitantly hooked your thumbs into your underwear and pulled them down on autopilot, cringing slightly at the large wet spot on the little triangle. You pressed your thighs together to help alleviate some tension. It didn’t help.

“Get up there,” she nodded her head towards her bed frame. You sat on the bed to scoot up the mattress, but she stopped you, tightly gripping your ankle.

“Nuh uh, hands’n knees’ c’mon,” she scolded, “Wanna see that wet fuckin’ pussy.”

You clumsily got up onto your knees, hands sinking into her pine-scented blankets. Your erratic breaths picked up as you nervously looked back at her over your shoulder. Her expression softened slightly, whispering okay, baby? and you nodded enthusiastically. You never would’ve thought that you would enjoy Ellie being mean to you, but it was making you drip. She smirked and her gaze dropped to stare at your wet cunt, and it squeezed in excitement.

Be sexy! you thought. Make her want you!

You deepened the arch in your back slightly before you slowly crawled up her bed like a cat until you were faced with her black, detailed bed frame. You boldly shoved your face into her pillows, —you sniffed them very deeply— making sure to keep your ass up as far as you could.

“It’s like that?” You heard her scoff out. Your pussy twitched at her voice; You hoped she noticed.

You took a deep breath, “Is it?”

“Fucking smartass. Show me your pussy.”

Your body burned at her vulgarity; she had no shame! You whimpered before you reached your arms behind you to spread your asscheeks, both holes pulsing in excitement.

You felt her move onto the bed before you heard the ripping of fabric. She grabbed both your wrists in one hand, knotting your soaking wet panties around them before dropping your bound hands onto your back.

“ELL— “

You were going to scold her for ripping your new pair, but you were cut off by a stinging slap on your ass. You let out a pained groan in the pillow as your nails dug into your palms. Oh, you liked that. A lot. You wanted more. Fuck, you want her to hurt you.

“Gotta beat it into you, huh? That’s the type of shit you like?” Ellie said in a nasty timbre. “The only way t’get you to behave?”

You didn’t even get to lift your head to say yes! before another harsh slap landed on your other cheek and you let out a muffled squeal again. You knew your pussy was dripping onto her duvet in a puddle!

“You’re lucky you’re only getting my fucking hand. Fuckin’ slut.”

Why was the disgusting part of you wishing that she were using something more? Something that she could etch into your skin forever?

“E-Ell— “

“Be quiet.”

You shut up. You shut up so quickly.

“Fuuck, look at this fucking ass.” You felt her calloused hands massage both cheeks. She spread them, made them jiggle. Hit you again.

“Gonna let me play with it, babygirl? Hm? Gonna let me touch you how I want to?” She cooed out at you. You knew she knew your answer, but you nodded your sweaty head into her pillow anyway.

You felt her place a light kiss on the back of your thigh, right under your asscheek, before she got up. You heard a drawer slide open. Her… special drawer. Fuck, she was going to destroy you.

You craned your neck as best as you could

to watch as she pulled out some items. She set them on the dresser before she undid her chains, bracelets, and earrings. She took her turtleneck and slacks off, leaving her with mussed hair and a black sports bra with matching boyshorts. Her back, her fucking back, holy fuck—

Your thoughts were halted by a thud near the edge of the bed: you couldn’t see anything that she chose, but you saw that familiar shade of purple in the middle of the small pile.

“You comfortable in that position?” She questioned you suddenly, her softness returning.

“Umm… I like it, but my arms hurt a little, not gonna lie.”

She tsked at you, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“M’sorry! I was really into the “don’t talk” thing— “

“If the don't talk thing makes you not tell me when you're uncomfortable, I’m not doing it. You gotta tell me when you feel off, I don’t care why or when it is,” She crawled up to you and undid the knot from your wrists before grabbing your hip to help move you onto your back. “Here, stretch out.”

You laid your head on her pillow as you extended your arms and legs, sighing in relief before you rested, limbs spread out on the mattress, “M’okay now.”

She hummed in acknowledgement, but she wasn’t looking at your face. She was staring at your wet cunt, and it made you squeeze hard. She licked her lips as more slick pooled at your hole before meeting your eyes. “I like you better like this actually.”

You nodded as you offered her your wrists, signaling her to tie them again with a wide grin.

She laughed at you before crawling up to pull at your bra wire, “Wait, take this off first.”

“Want you to do it,” you sighed out dreamily.

She hummed at you, moving up to straddle your waist, “I meant it when I said this was cute, by the way.”

“Exactly, was cute! You saw my panties for three seconds and ripped them to shreds,” you cackled out.

“I was excited, felt a little frisky!” She laughed with you.

You both slowed your giggles when she started rubbing them through the fabric, both hands massaging you through the cups.

Your eyes fluttered when your nipples brushed up against the lace, your back arching into her touch. She slowly bent down to take one of them into her mouth, the bulb in her mouth circling the peak. You gasped sharply, arching deeper as your hand flew to the back of her head. You gently scratched her scalp with your nails, and she sucked on it.

You jerked and your grip on her hair tightened, and she moaned around you. You moaned at the vibrations on your sensitive skin.

You hadn’t noticed her hands snuck under you to undo the clasp of your bra as she pulled away from you, discarding the flimsy cloth and tossing it somewhere.

“So much for a surprise,” you playfully rolled your eyes at her. Calloused fingers dug into your cheeks. Your smile dropped and your eyes fluttered as hers burned into yours.

“You’re not off the fuckin’ hook. Watch your mouth, you understand?” She said lowly, breath hitting your face. You nodded quickly.

“I understand,” you whimpered out.

“Atta girl, you're learning,” she patronized with a satisfied grin, patting your cheek a couple times. You blushed harder. “Gimme those hands.”

She sat up to reach for your destroyed panties, your wrists connected at the veins as she bound them together, much tighter than the first time.

You rested your arms on the pillow behind you. She adjusted them so that your head was propped up and your neck was supported. You poked your chest out more as your tits jiggled with your movements.

“I do anything you don’t like, you tell me.” She said in a hushed, but stern tone.

“I will, El, promise.”

“Okay,” she bent down to press a soft kiss to your mouth before moving off you and towards the pile of toys.

She grabbed one of… what is that?

It was a teal circle with a small hole at the top of it. Technology is so interesting—

“It’s clean, promise,” she must’ve noticed your furrowed brows and stare. You shook your head.

“S’not that, what… what is it?”

“A vibrator, babe,” she said simply.

“…Hm, never seen one like that before.”

“I hadn’t either. It was a gift,” she snorted before she clicked a button on the top of it. A low vibration filled the room, “It feels good, though.”

“What’s it feel like?”

“It’s supposed to feel like you’re getting head… sorta,” She said in thought, “It kinda does, like a little bit… wanna see if you like it?”

“Yeah, p-please?”

“That’s cute.”

She brought her free hand up to roll your nipples between her thumb and pointer finger, making you whine out and squirm and arch your back. Your eyes fluttered closed.

You felt the gentle vibrations on your inner thigh before they slowly trailed up with every twist and pinch Ellie gave your nipples. Your hips started bucking up before she brought her hand down to slap your pussy. You let out a loud moan as your eyes shot open to meet her dark ones.

“Stop moving.”

“C-can't help it,” you said with pout.

“Yeah, you can.”

You let out a huff, and she gave your cunt another wet slap, much harder. You squealed loudly as your legs squeezed shut.

“Don’t get a fuckin’ attitude.”

You whimpered a sloppy slew of apologies, but you knew she wasn’t hearing it as she pried your legs apart with one strong hand to slap it one more time before slowly rubbing your clit. Your hips jerked, but you forced them not to lift.

“You get so fuckin’ wet,” she whispered in awe, the sticky noises of your pussy filling the room as she played with it. “Hear that? Shit.”

“Missed you s-so much— “

“Know you did.”

You moaned her name, and she mockingly moaned yours back. It made you leak more.

You felt her spread your lips open so she could watch your clit throb and jerk in need. You looked down and saw her eyes glued to your cunt, her freckled cheeks tinted red and her wet, pink lips parted. She looked up at you, smirking when she met your intrigued, needy eyes as she placed the vacant part of the vibrator over your clit.

“Like watching?”

“Think so,” you shyly mumbled out.

And then you felt the vibrations on your soaked bud. You gasped as your eyes closed.

You felt her pull the toy away before she slapped your clit. You cried out as your eyes shot open to meet hers again.

“Watch me. Don’t close your eyes.”

You jerkily nodded; You watched her so closely. She kissed your clit before spreading them with her fingers to bring the open part of the toy to your clit, trapping it inside once more.

Your bud was surrounded by the pulsing sensations of the soft silicone and your eyes almost rolled back into your head, but you craved Ellie’s praise, her reassurance. You wanted to be good for her.

All you could do was moan and shudder and watch her.

“Feels good?”

“Feels s’good, baby—”

“Yeah? Want some more?” she said fondly with a filthy glare.

You mumbled out a quiet yeah, wa’more! in between your pleas.

She pressed another button on the toy, and the vibrations got stronger. Your cries got louder.

“Sloppy fucking pussy.”

The tight pull in your gut was building, but you needed more. You wanted to pull on your nipples so bad but you fucking couldn’t! Why did you want your hands tied so badly?

“El,” you barely got out between your heavy pants, “can you—mmh!”

“What?”

“T-ouch my tits? Please, m’right there!”

She snickered at you before reaching up to slap one of them, leaving remnants of your slick on the soft skin. That wasn’t what you were expecting, but you want more of that!

“Hit me more?” you keened, your eyes glossy.

“You asking?” she snickered, and you nodded so fast.

She shook her head at you, “You’re gross.”

For her! You’re so nasty for her her her—

You received another slap. And another. Then she reached up to dig her nails into your brown bud. You couldn’t stop your eyes from rolling back, it hurt so good.

“Shit, m’gonna cum!”

“Uh huh.”

All you could do was moan out warnings of s’coming! and I feel it! and yes! It built and built until you could taste it and—

… Everything you felt stopped. And Ellie was laughing. You were going to cry.

No… nonono—

“Told you to keep your eyes open.”

“E-Ellie, please no, I can’t— “

“Y’know, I was hoping you could follow simple instructions,” she cut you off as she moved towards the pile again, grabbing her… fat fucking dick, yes finally yesyesyes—

And lube… and an emerald green buttplug with a matching… remote? Oh, fuck—

“You don’t know how to fucking listen, do you?” She tossed the items next to you before grabbing your shaky thighs to pull you closer to her, your head dropping onto the soft mattress. You laid flat on your back as she loomed over you, your legs on either side of her.

She watched your twitchy hole produce more slick, “Don’t even need to get you ready, could just slip right in and fuck you how I want.”

“Wan’you to! Wann’it so bad— “

“Yeah? Want me t’use you?”

“Fuck yes! Yeah!”

“Keep these fuckin’ legs open, then,” she grabbed her dick and stood to step into it, adjusting the straps securing them around her hips. She climbed back between your legs as she intensely stared at your tits. She looked so deep in thought, brows furrowed with her bottom lip between her teeth; What the hell was her evil brain conjuring up?!

She gave your breast one last burning slap that made you cry out before grabbing the lube off the bed. You watched as she ripped the cap off, pouring some into the palm of her hand to bring down to her dick to massage it into the ridges. Your walls were squeezing so tight, your pussy begging for whatever she was about to do.

You almost flatlined on her bed when she straddled you, climbing up your body until her dick rested between your tits, the lube she smeared all over it transferring to your skin. Her thick, wet tip was almost touching your chin, and all you could do was gape at it before slowly blinking up at her, meeting her burning gaze. She bit her lip as she slowly tipped the bottle of lube, letting the thick consistency land your chest before she rubbed it into your skin with her cock. You felt so fucking dirty!

“Stick that tongue out,” she ordered deeply as she closed and tossed the lube bottle.

Your lips parted on command, your tongue slowly sliding between the two of them. She grabbed your face in a tight grip before letting a line of spit slip out of her mouth and onto your tongue. You felt it slide down your tongue before you happily swallowed

it. You lolled your tongue out, silently asking for more with pleading eyes.

She sneered at you before she did it again, getting it all over your chin and cheeks. You couldn’t stop the whimper that left your mouth. She let a blob out onto your tits, mixing with the lube.

But then you felt a fiery hand come down on your cheek, your head flying to the side as you let out a choked gasp. Your thighs clamped together on instinct as your walls quivered at the sting. You felt her place a hand on the side of your head, keeping it still as her nails dug into your scalp.

“G’na fuck these tits s’good,” you heard her groan out. Your cunt throbbed in desperation.

“Wan’ you to!”

“Beg me to,” she hissed at you.

“Please, baby, pleasefuck’em!—“

You felt her squeeze both your wet tits in one tight hand before she forced her dick between them, both of you letting out moans in between the squelchy noises from your bodies.

Her grip in your hair tightened as you heard her pleased sighs, her slurred curses, her whines of your name, why were you getting so tight, why did it feel like you were about to cum—

“Fuuuck, babygirl, feels s’fuckin’ good—!”

“E-El, please— “

“Yeah? What does my girl need? Wan’ some fuckin’ attention?” You hated how hard your core squeezed at her belittling tone. You nodded as fast as you could in her tight grasp.

“Not g’na til I cum, you’re gonna fuckin’ lay there’n let me do what I want, tha’s what you wanted right? Huh?”

More hot tears were falling to your hairline as you quietly sobbed and pleaded for her to touch your pussy, but she wasn’t hearing any of it. She released the grip she had on your head, but she just shoved her drenched, lubricated fingers into your mouth. Your eyes fluttered shut as you hummed around them, sucking them deeper.

“Gonna fuck that throat so hard one day, swear to god.”

You hummed and garbled pleas around them in excitement.

“Shit! Need that? Just wan’ something in that pretty mouth?”

You nodded, you kept nodding, you want anything she’ll give you.

“G’na fucking cum, all over that gorgeous face,” she gritted out as she snatched her fingers from your mouth. Her wet hand flew to your tits, pushing them closer together so that she could fuck her dick into the little hole she tightened.

“W-Wan’ your cum, daddy!” you encouraged her as you watched, you needed her to cum!

“Shit, baby, stick your tongue out,” she whined out as she grinded her dick between your tits. Your eyes opened and your tongue immediately started swiping across her tip whenever it came up to your mouth. Her hips jolted and stuttered on top of you as she watched you, and you watched her. You hurriedly sucked her rubber tip into your mouth and sucked sloppily like you were trying to milk her. You knew she couldn’t feel the suctions, but you saw her eyes roll back into her skull as she let out a loud moan. She was bucking her hips into her strap as her nails dug into your tits. You kept the tip in your mouth as she rode out her pleasure.

She looked so pretty and soft: fluttery lids, swollen lips, and her dotted cheeks flushed as quiet whines left her mouth. So pretty, she’s so fucking pretty—

Her tip suddenly slipped from your mouth as she scooted down your body.

“K-Kiss?” you asked softly, voice unsteady.

She didn’t say anything as she leaned down to connect your lips. It was light and careful, both of you breathing into each other's whines. She made sure to check on you, mumbling an okay? against your mouth. You whined out a yesyeah m’okay before you reconnected your lips.

You kissed for what felt like hours before she sat up to move off you.

“W-Wan’more,” you mumbled with pleading expression.

“Okay, babe.”

You watched as she scooted down, shuffling until she was between your legs. She held one of them up with a hand under your knee to press it to your chest, playing with your entrance with her free hand. You felt her slide a finger in and your mouth fell open, your walls clinging to her the deeper she prodded. You were stunned at how fast she found that spongy spot inside you, and you squeezed her tighter.

“Loosen up, can barely fucking move.”

You couldn’t do anything except wail out incoherencies about how fast you were going to cum, and you felt her slide another finger in.

“Nuh uh, hold it.”

“Can’t, Ellie, fuck— “

“Yeah you can, hold that shit.”

You tried you tried, but you couldn’t. All you could get out was a cry of stop, baby! stopstopstop before your peak washed over you.

But the pleasure left as fast as it came as she pulled out with a tsk, another slap landing on your pulsing clit. You sobbed her name, tears running down your temples.

“Couldn’t even hold it for a few seconds?” She scolded, and it made you and your pussy cry harder.

“Stop crying,” you felt her releasing the tight grip from under your knee to softly wipe your tears off your face. “Look at me.”

Your glossy eyes slowly peeled open, taking in the sight above you.

“Good?” she asked softly, and you nodded with a whimper of m’okay, El, I like it so much! please fuck me!

“Yeah? Babygirl wants some dick?”

“Yes! Pleasefuckmee—!”

You let out a groan when you felt her dick slap on your pulsing bud. You were spewing pleas and curses and cries of her name; you wanted her inside! Wanted to feel her so deep in your stomach!

You couldn’t help but lift your head to look down at her cock sliding between your folds, her thick tip nudging your clit with every thrust.

How were you about to cum from that alone? Your eyes were fluttering from the pleasure. You whimpered out a warning of your impending orgasm.

“You gonna cum from this? M’barely doing anything.”

You couldn’t speak, you just nodded. Your mind was hazy and racing with thoughts of her at the same time, your core clenching tight. Yeah, you were going to cum!

“Daddy—!”

“Fuuuck yeah, need me, baby?”

Your eyes rolled back so far back you swore you could see your brain shaking its head at you in disappointment, and you came so fucking hard. You felt her tip push past your spasming entrance as she quickly rubbed your clit with her thumb as it hit you. That stretch made you scream, and your head fell back.

“S’so big!” You couldn’t even register what you were saying, your burning orgasm taking over your mouth.

“Gonna be my good girl’n take it? Gonna make me proud?” Her voice sent another wave through your body as it shook in painful pleasure.

“Yeah, daddy, m’your good girl!”

“Then lemme in, love, c’mon,” she whispered out over your moans and groans and squeals. Your orgasm was still ripping through your body, your wetness dripping down your ass and onto the new puddle on the blanket. She was tearing you open with every shallow thrust, but you took every ridged, veiny inch like you were meant to.

“Good, baby? Talk t’me,” she said gently, halting her thrusts as she caressed your thigh.

“M’sti—m’stillcummimg—! “

She scoffed a wet laugh at you and went even deeper, “I feel it, squeezing the fuck outta me. Dirty fucking whore.”

You felt the balls of the strap resting against your ass as you slowly came down. She was all the way in, slowly pulling out only to push back in. Her tits were slightly jiggling in her bra every time she bottomed out. Your hands wriggled in the fabric; you wanted them in your mouth so bad.

“Wan’touch you, daddy, please?” you moaned out in a gasp as she fucked back into you, stretching you out.

“Touch me where?” She asked, thrusting deeper.

“Mmh! Your tits, please!”

She huffed smugly before fucking into you faster. She brought her hand up to her chest, squeezing one of them through her bra, “These tits?”

“Yeaah, fuck!” You could already feel another orgasm twisting in your gut at the painful stretch.

She mumbled out an uh huh as she slowly pulled the elastic up, her breasts slowly dropping out. She slowed her thrusts and brought her other hand to pull the cotton over her head, throwing her head back as both hands played with her nipples. Her moaning made you moan and fuck, you were in love!

“Lemme go, El, fuck!” you pleaded, your hands pulling at the restraints. How was such fragile cloth so resistant!

“Shit, baby, feels s’fucking good,” you watched her pull and twist them as she whimpered your name as she ignored you. She’d stopped thrusting to play with herself, only slowly grinding her hips into you, so you planted your feet on the bed to thrust your hips downward, clumsily bouncing up and down on her dick as you watched her.

She looked down at you and sneered, “Yeah? Wanna fuck me?”

“Yes, w’na make you cum, daddy.”

“Here, baby, gimme your hands,” you halted your movements bringing your arms to hers. She tore the knot in your panties and tossed them before slowly pulling out fully, a nasty shhlck! filling the room. You were so wet.

She leaned above you, reaching over your head to grab some pillows, setting them beside you. Her tits were in your face, so you slowly brought an inexperienced hand up to touch one softly. You gave it a gentle squeeze, bringing your other hand up to rub into the other. She let out a satisfied sigh of your name. You leaned up, boldly taking a soft nipple into your mouth. You sucked at it softly as your eyes fluttered shut, swirling your tongue around the sensitive skin.

“Shit, tha’s so good,” she moaned out before pulling at your now sweated out hair. You gave her one last hard suck before your head fell back on the bed, her mouth instantly connecting with yours in a spit-filled, smacking kiss. Her tongue was sliding all over yours before you sucked it into your mouth, making her moan into your mouth. She brought her hand up to wrap around your throat, gently squeezing the sides. She pulled back with a look of concern on her face, grip immediately loosening at your whimper, but you brought a hand up to cover hers on your throat, squeezing tighter. Your eyes nearly crossed when she hummed with a knowing smirk, pressing her middle finger and thumb into the sides again. She pulled away, licking your bottom lip before bending down to whisper in your ear.

“Turn over.”

You stumblingly flipped onto your stomach as she shoved two plush pillows under your hips to support them, even though you were poking your ass out towards her anyway. You felt her slap it playfully before kissing it.

You felt her hands pulling your cheeks apart like she told you to do to yourself earlier. You felt her staring and it made your heart beat faster.

“Okay, El?”

“Mhm, just looking.”

You looked at her over your shoulder, “You can… um… y’know?”

“No, I don’t know,” she snickered.

“What… what you said earlier?”

“What’d I say?”

“About me! The thing you said!”

“Want me t’eat your ass?” She said in between kisses on your cheek. She was grinning so hard.

“…Y-yes?”

“Then ask me.”

You looked forward with a harsh sigh, “You’re so annoyi— “

A tight hand grabbed your hair to pull your head back roughly. You let out a pained moan at the ceiling before you felt her lips at your ear, “What’d I tell you about that fuckin’ mouth?”

You instinctively pushed back on her with a whine of m’sorry daddy!

“No, you’re not, you keep talking shit’n it’s pissing me off. I’ve been trying to be nice t’you.”

Nice?! She almost made you black out with one orgasm!

You didn’t have a response, but your eyes actually did cross when you felt a thumb prod your ass.

“Should just shove m’dick in here, huh? I bet that’d get you to shut the fuck up,” she spat out and your back arched deeper at her proposal.

You felt another glob of spit land on your other hole, her thumb immediately circling it before popping the tip of it in. You let out a loud moan at the intrusive sting.

“Been wanting me to fuck this ass since I said it, haven’t you?” She rasped at you.

“Yeah!“

“Yeah!” She mocked you in a squeaky tone. “You’re disgusting, who woulda thought you would like this type of shit.”

Her thumb was fucking in and out of your hole as fast as she could manage. You shouldn’t like how much it hurts, that burn shouldn’t be making your orgasm build up again.

She let your hair go and your head flopped onto the pillow in front of you. Your nails dug into it when you felt her dick line up at the entrance of your pussy before she shoved it in. You let out a muffled shout.

You didn’t have a chance to adjust before she started fucking into you hard. Squelchy noises, slaps of skin, and your screams of pleasure immediately filled the room, her headboard knocking against the black walls. It was so fast and hot and made you feel cheap, and you fucking loved it. It made you feel desired.

“This is what you wanted me to do in that fuckin’ closet?”

“Yeah, daddy, fuck!”

“Wanted me t’fuck you up? Make you m’fucking bitch?”

“Uggh! El—!”

“Shouldn’t even be fucking you in this bed,” She groaned out, grinding her thumb deep into your ass.

“Should’ve bent you over that dinner table, right in front of that fucker.”

The imagery of Ellie fucking into you in front of your asshole of a waiter, making you scream out in front of everyone eating and drinking, claiming you as hers so that they know who you belong to made you see white. You bit down on the pillow in front of you as bursts of wetness left your cunt and splattered onto your thighs, the pillows, and Ellie’s dick. But she didn’t stop, you felt her go faster. Hit deeper.

“M’cu-mming!” you screamed, shouts of prickling pleasure muffled by the material in your mouth.

“Yeah? Tha’s making you cum? Wanna get fucked in public like a whore?”

“D-ahh! Fuckme!”

“Baby’s so stupid for this dick,” Her tip was hitting your fucking cervix and it hurt so good. You were about to cum again! “Who’s pussy is this?”

“S’your pussy! S’daddy’s pussy!”

“Keep sayin’ that, s’gonna make me cum so hard,” she groaned out, her thumb leaving your ass and ripping the pillows from underneath you, your hips dropping onto the bed. You felt her push back into you, her chest on your back as she grinded deep into you. Her arm came around your neck, your throat right in the crevice of her elbow as you let the pillow fall from your mouth. Your nails were digging into the covers as your cunt gushed on her.

“You’re getting so fucking wet. Like when I fuck you up? Treat you like shit?”

“Yeah yeahyeah—!”

“Make me cum, babygirl,” she whispered in your ear. “Fuck me back, c’mon.”

You pushed back onto her as best as you could as she grinded forward, even though it was quick and sloppy and desperate. She started moaning out fucks and like thats and all you could mumble out was slurry s’yours, daddy! because you knew she liked it. Her voice on its own was getting you there.

“Fuck, m’gonna fucking cum— “

“Uh huh! Cum in me, daddy pleasepleaseplease!” you squealed out in dazed excitement. You want her cum you want her cum!

“Fuuuck, babygirl, s’coming—!”

“Please make my p-pussy sloppy?” you could barely get your pleas out as your mind fogged. You couldn’t even bring yourself to feel embarrassed at your eagerness for her cum, and by the way Ellie shouted your name in your ear as her body shook on top of yours, she must’ve somewhat liked it? Right?

Your second thoughts quickly died as you fucked back onto her, helping her ride out her orgasm. She was crying out as her nails dug into your shoulder, and the sharp pierce made you cum again! You let out babbles of her name in your pleasure. You were both messes in each other's arms, you pushing back while she pushed forward, trying to make it last as long as you could before it died down.

You let out wet groans as she grinded you both to the ends of your orgasms, and you collapsed.

You felt a light kiss on your shoulder before Ellie gently pulled out of you, falling onto the bed so that you were side by side. You both tried to catch your breath in your exhaustion.

After minutes of heavy breathing and light caresses from Ellie, you reached under to grab the object that was digging into your side. When you saw what it was, your eyes widened, and stomach twisted.

You heard Ellie laugh softly next to you, “We didn’t get to use it.”

You paused as you stared at the buttplug that she’d thrown on the bed, the faux emerald at the end of it shining under the green fairy lights.

“It’s pretty,” you said in a hoarse whisper.

“Mhm,” she nodded. “Feels good, too.”

Your toes curled.

“What’s it feel like?”

She smiled, “You sound cute when you ask that.”

You shook your head and grinned shyly, “I’m just curious, I assume it’s… nice, or whatever! People on Twitter always talk about it.”

“Yeah, it’s really fucking nice.”

“Have you used it?” She nodded.

“Course I have, used all of ‘em.”

“Tell me what happened!” you said, dropping the toy on the bed before giddily flipping onto your side to face her. It made her giggle; You loved that sound.

“I was… like in this sex shop in Cali, and the cashier was like ‘heyyy, your orders over a hundred dollars, you can get a free item, blah blah blah’— “

“Not that, you bonehead! I mean when you use it!” You both let out loud laughs.

Her smile dropped slowly before she whispered, “Came really fuckin’ hard the first time I tried it, like… really hard. Swore I saw god.”

Your core squeezed in intrigue. You listened closely as she continued, “Like, I was still cumming even after I switched it off. There was a giant puddle on the floor when I finally stopp—.”

“Ellie?” you softly cut her off.

“Yeah, honey?”

“Can you… will you… I wanna try?” you said as your face burned, hoping she would accept your poor proposal to take your… other virginity.

You watched a sly grin slowly grow on her face.

“Lemme go check on Duchess’n smoke.”

You nodded slowly with a fluttery blink.

It was almost midnight, and you were laying next to Ellie on her couch in her Lauryn Hill shirt as you nursed a bottle of water. You watched as she exhaled the smoke from her pre-roll.

After chasing Duchess around the kitchen and living room, you both covered her in kisses before filling her food bowl and shutting the guest door as she ate.

“Such a nice view,” you mumbled as you gazed out the large window. You’d never been fond of the city: you always appreciated the stillness of your town, the close community where everyone knew each other, but the scenery in front of you almost makes you want to change your mind. It was always so lively and bright, even in the darkness.

“Right? When I first moved in, I slept in front of the window for weeks. The noise helped me sleep a bit better and the lights are pretty,” She said quietly before taking a puff. You listened and watched as she exhaled the smoke. You sat your bottle on the floor before speaking.

“Can I try?”

“You know how?” She asked impishly with a raise of her brow as the remnants of her puff left her mouth and nose.

“Fuck you! I know how to smoke, I just choose not to!”

“Right,” she said with an eye roll, gently tapping the ashes off on the ashtray in front of her before passing the joint to you.

You propped yourself up on your elbows before taking it between your thumb and pointer finger, watching the smoke leave the lit end before sticking it between your lips. You only inhaled for a couple seconds before pulling it from your mouth, softly coughing.

You slowly turned your head to look at her for approval, finding that she was already watching you. Her hair was still damp from earlier, her lips were swollen, and she was still in her boyshorts.

“Meh. Still a fucking rookie,” she said in a light tone as she wet her lips. You shoved her shoulder with yours, making her laugh.

“That strain’s supposed to make you horny,” she whispered, attempting to grab the joint from you. Something nasty curled in your gut at her tone, mindlessly bringing the joint back to your lips and inhaled some more before she could snatch it. You held it much longer than the first puff before choking on the carbon, making her laugh at you. You felt her pat your back gently through your coughs. You passed it back to her and she took it with a shake of her head.

After she smoked her joint down, she bolted upstairs, swiftly returning to the couch with full hands.

You flipped onto your back as she pressed the button on the buttplug remote, and it immediately started pulsing. She smirked down at you.

“There’s a couple settings, we can try ‘em all and see which one you like the most, ‘kay?”

You nodded eagerly as she switched it off and threw the toy on the couch next to her dick and flavored lube. She straddled you, grabbing your face in both hands to connect your lips in a soft kiss. You hummed into her mouth before she pulled away.

“Lemme give you head first, though.”

“S-sure.”

She hummed before smacking her wet lips onto yours. She planted wet, sucking kisses on your jaw, neck, and shoulder before she moved down your body. She lifted the shirt you had on just under your tits before she went crazy on your clit. She was flicking and licking and sucking between your legs as your fingers ran through her soft hair to pull her closer. Your moans and noises of your pussy as she fucked you with her tongue and fingers filled the entire first floor of her home. You came so quickly on her tongue, squeezing the muscle and fingers in a bone-crushing grip. You could tell she liked it as much as you did by how she moaned into your cunt.

After you came down, Ellie instructed you to hold your legs up so she could see your ass. They were pressed to your chest, both your arms tucked into the crevice of your knees as Ellie prepped you for the toy.

She’d rubbed some of your cum in before she spat on it, and now she was drenching her fingers and opening in the lubricant as you watched.

“Just relax, ‘kay?”

“Yeah,” you nodded. You were a bit nervous, but your walls were clenching with want.

She nodded before gently rubbing your drenched hole with her pointer and middle finger, making you sigh. You felt her slowly push a finger in and you immediately started to squirm. Your body was so hot already.

“Okay?” She asked you gently.

“Yeah m’good,” you said in a wanton sigh.

She grinned before kissing the back of your thigh. You felt another finger at your entrance before a burning sensation took over when she slowly pressed it in, and your head dropped onto the cushion in a choked gasp.

“Yeah? You like this shit?” She asked snarkily, but shock was evident in her voice.

“Y-yeah, El, like it!”

“So fucking cute, gonna fuck this ass so hard,” she whispered out, grinding her fingers deeper before pulling them out to squirt more lube on them.

She slowly pushed them back in and the lack of resistance made your toes curl.

“Do me a favor?”

“M-mhm?”

“Get that nice’n wet for me,” she said, shoving the emerald plug in between your twitchy fingers. You gripped it tight, releasing the hold you had on your legs so you could spread them. You brought your free hand down to your drippy cunt to spread the lips, exposing your clit. You slowly dragged the toy up and down your folds, a quiet, squishy sound joining the already sloppy noises in the room from Ellie’s fingers in your ass.

You could see her watching with a blush on her face, licking her lips as she prodded another finger at your clenching opening. You could feel the stretch more as she slowly popped the tip of it in, so you distracted yourself. You propped yourself on one elbow to bring the plug down to the entrance of your cunt, slowly fucking it into you. The silicone ridges dragged on your walls, and it made your eyes roll as you moaned softly. Ellie let out a shocked moan as she watched you fuck the plug in and out of your pussy. She leaned forward to spit on your clit, and you brought your shaky hand down to rub it. She mumbled curses out.

“Thinking about me fucking this pretty pussy? Wan’me t’split you open again?” She hummed out messily. She was just as fucked up as you were, and it made you squeeze.

“Yeah, daddy,” you moaned out softly, fucking the toy into yourself faster as Ellie fucked three fingers into your ass. “Shit!”

“Uh huh, nasty slut, look at you milking that fuckin’ toy.”

You picked up the pace of your shallow thrusts and she matched you, fucking even harder into your ass. You brainlessly brought your wet fingers up to your tits, roughly grabbing at both your nipples in attempts to mimic Ellie’s hands on you. You felt the familiar pull in your gut, but it was so much stronger, and you knew it was going to hit you hard. You were going to cum so quick!

“Ellie,” you could barely get your squeaky warning out, “Thi-think m’gonna, g’na make a m-ess!”

“Yeah, wan‘it baby, make me wet— “

“M’gonna—!”

You cut yourself off with a sharp gasp as colors exploded behind your eyelids, the hand at your tits slamming onto the cushion to dig your nails into it. Your shouts of pleasure overtook the sputtering sounds of wetness that shot out of you. You pulled the toy out and rubbed quick circles on your clit with it, making you release more juices all over Ellie’s expensive couch. She didn’t even seem to care with how hard she was still fucking your ass, whispering nasty curses at you, talking you through it, calling you sloppy, calling you hers. Your legs were trembling as both holes quivered in release.

Your sprays were starting to die down with the circles on your clit, Ellie’s fingers slowing.

Your eyes slowly peeled open, and you were met with her… high ass ceiling! You smiled as you felt her place kisses all over your thighs.

“Tired?” she mumbled out against your knee.

You slowly shook your head when you regained your ability to move.

“Wan’more.”

And she smirked.

Ellie moved you onto your stomach, —if she kept fucking you like this, you were going to die! — your face shoved into her cushion so you were surrounded by her scent. Your ass was, once again, propped up on Ellie’s expensive fucking pillows that you were about to stain with your sopping cunt, but neither of you cared. She was lubricating the plug from behind you, the gooey noises from the slippery liquid filling your ears.

You should’ve never hit that fucking aphrodisiac of a joint when she passed it to you: you never wanted to have sex so fucking bad in your life. You just lost your virginity a few hours ago; What’s happening to you?!

You couldn’t think of anything except Ellie and cumming and Ellie’s cum! You wanted her cum inside you so bad, you want to drown in her with every chance she’d give you—

“Ready, baby?”

“Yes, daddy, m’ready, need it s’bad,” you muffled into the cushion, your cheek squished against it. You sounded so… far away.

“Listen t’you, all floaty,” she murmured. You could hear her grin through it, it made your toes curl, “Feelin’ good?”

“S’good, daddy, fuck me please?”

“…Look at me, babe.”

You used all your energy to lift yourself up onto your elbows turning your sweaty, thoughtless head towards her, gazing over your shoulder and into her gentle, concerned eyes. She’s so beautiful—

“Baby?”

“Hm?”

“Why're you smilin’?”

“M’happy,” you felt yourself grin harder.

“Yeah?”

“Mhm,” you nodded lightly. “W’na fuck.”

“‘Kay,” she nodded, her searching gaze still lingering on your face. “Tap my thigh twice.”

You reached a limp hand behind you, immediately following her instructions.

“You do that when you wanna stop, okay?” You nodded, you felt like a bobble head. You want her in your guts now.

“What're you gonna do when you wanna stop?”

You paused.

Then tapped her thigh twice. You dropped your head on the cushion again.

You felt her kiss down your back. You sighed happily.

She slowly rubbed your clit and you jolted, before pushing your hips back onto her fingers. She was planting gentle kisses all over your back and shoulders to relax you. You let out a whine at the feel of her lips on you.

Then you felt the silicone on your hole. You moaned into the cushion in excitement and anticipation, you needed it to pulse inside you so badly.

“What’re gonna do when you wanna stop?” She repeated, her breathing heavy.

You slapped her thigh a bunch of times. You needed her to know you wanted it. You needed this so badly! You needed to know she wanted you!

Then you felt her pop the tip of it inside you. You cried out in appreciation as your holes clenched tight, trying to suck the toy deeper into you. She was pressing soft kisses all over your spine as she slowly pushed it in. You hadn’t realized that you were grinding your clit into the soft fabric of the pillow under you.

“Such a good girl, taking it so easy,” You felt her push the last little part of it inside your ass before the little jewel at the end of it was poking out of you. It was so foreign, but you couldn’t help the satisfied sighs and soft cries as you pussy dripped all over her pillows and couch.

You felt her plant one more kiss at the end of your spine before you felt the vibrations stir in your ass.

“Fuck, oh god! M’—aah!”

“Yeah? Feels fucking good, doesn’t it?”

You didn’t even have the ability to think of an answer before you felt her dick poke at the entrance of your cunt, slowly sliding in. Every wire in your brain went into overdrive as the pulsing of the toy and her cock rattled your insides in unison. She was slowly fucking her dick into you, sliding in deep so her tip bumped into your cervix, making you let out a muffled shout into the couch cushion.

“Fuckmedaddywan’itharder—!”

Your quick babbles were cut off as she sped up her thrusts, both her hands planted at the end of your back so she could rock you back and forth on her dick. She was drilling you, your slick coating the balls of her strap. You felt yourself slowly drifting away, your eyes crossed in your head and drool spilling down your cheek. All you could think about was Ellie. EllieEllieEllie—!

“M’right here, babygirl, I gotchu,” she cooed at you as she dug you out and you went limp. You heard the gushy sounds of your pussy and fuck, you were going to squirt so hard you felt it in your toes—

You felt the vibrations in your ass increase and you let out shouts of bliss, her tip beating your cervix just how you needed with every thrust. For the first time in your life, your brain was silent: no doubt, no loathing, no anxiety. Just pure ecstasy. You felt so fucking full. Full of her and joy and love! You love her and you never wanted her to leave you again. You love her you love her—

“M’yours, daddy, promise!” Tears pricked at your eyes as that hot feeling grew in your stomach. Your heart was pounding, and you couldn’t think, you just rambled as pleasure and happiness and love rushed through you. You were about to cum, all over her, all for her—!

“Shhh, I know, baby, it’s okay— “

“Don’t wan’anyone else! M’yours, always yours!”

You don’t remember when, but Ellie had pulled out of you. And the vibrations stopped. But you were still riding that edge, this close to your peak. Your fists clenched tight, and your hips bucked back to meet hers even though she wasn’t there to catch them. You heard Ellie gently call out your name from your side as she rubbed your back in attempts to slow your fuzzy babbling, “Look at m— “

“Always loved you, daddy, always been you, m’yours, m’all you— “

You cut yourself off with moans of her name and incoherent shouts and sobs of love you so much! I love you! as your orgasm ripped through you. Your thighs trembled as colorful specs of glitter exploded in your vision. You heard yourself screaming out as wetness splattered all over you and the couch and everywhere, and it didn’t stop. Your euphoria was so strong, your clenching cunt spraying as your ass squeezed around the plug shoved deep inside you. You were just shaking and crying and cumming and cumming and cumming—

You don’t know how much time passed, but you were still shaking as tears rolled down your cheeks. You couldn’t feel the plug inside you and Ellie’s strap was gone: you were pressed against her bare chest, your tits pressed together as she held you close. She was rubbing your back as she pressed gentle kisses to the side of your sweaty head, gently humming in your ear. You slowly brought your arm up to limply throw around her waist. You couldn’t say anything.

“Hi, honey,” She barely whispered in your ear. “Can you look at me?”

You slowly shook your head. You felt her kiss your head again.

“S’fine, just breath, okay?”

You nodded again. And your eyes welled up some more.

She must’ve heard your sniffling because she immediately pulled back to gently caress your cheek. You tried to turn your head to hide in the cushion, but she wasn’t having it.

“C’mon angel, it’s just me, okay?”

You slowly redirected your gaze to hers, your vision blurry as you studied her features. You cried harder, sobbing as you nestled into her shoulder.

She didn’t press you after that, she only held you tighter. She whispered gentle shhhs and s’okay, baby, m’heres as you wept into her sweaty skin.

You know she heard your confession of your long-lasting feelings for her, and even though she didn’t seem upset with you, you couldn’t shake the embarrassment, confusion, and despair that overtook you.

But she held you. She held you so tight.

After your gasped sobs eased into soft whimpers and shaky exhales, Ellie guided you upstairs and into her bathroom, strong arms wrapped around your waist to steady your uncoordinated movements.

She lifted you onto the counter and pressed a soft kiss to your forehead before moving to the shower to turn it on. All you did was stare at her black towel hanging from the wall rack. You still couldn’t think.

You heard her shuffling around before she moved back to you, easily easing you off the counter and into the shower, making sure to place you under the warm water first.

You gaped at the droplets sliding down the shower wall and she rubbed the lathered sponge into your skin softly. She littered you with kisses the entire time: on your face, shoulder, fingers, anywhere she could reach. But you couldn’t move, and neither of you said anything.

After Ellie rinsed you off, she gently dried your coils and face while kissing your nose. You allowed her to wrap you in a towel, gently drying off the rest of your body as you looked off into nothing.

“C’mon, honey,” she whispered into your ear as she moved behind you, holding onto your waist and walking you to her bed to sit you down, her soiled blanket already discarded on the floor.

It seemed like everything was moving in slow motion as you gazed around her room: the lights were twinkling like fireflies, her fan in the corner of the room whirring like gusts of wind in your ears, the strings of the rug under your feet reminding you of clouds.

She softly called your name as she walked in front of you. Your legs fell open so she could stand between them, “Look at me.”

You took a deep breath before meeting her tender gaze. She cupped your cheeks, softly rubbing her thumbs into them, “You needa eat and drink something, okay? Want some water?”

You nodded.

“Is it okay if I leave for a sec— “

You shook your head quickly as tears filled your eyes at the thought of her leaving. You need her close, you need her here with you—

“Shhh, not gonna go, not leaving, I’m right here,” she comforted immediately, planting more kisses all over your face.

“Want some clothes?” You shook your head, and she nodded gently. She gave your lips one more kiss before ushering you to stand. She walked over to her dresser and grabbed her pine-scented lotion and ointment. She moved behind you, rubbing the soothing cream on your ass before moisturizing your skin, the pine surrounding you. You calmed down at the smell.

“Okay, baby, come lay down.”

She grabbed your wrist gently as she moved you to your side, telling you to lay on your stomach as she pulled a new blanket from her linen cabinet. You obeyed silently.

You were instantly surrounded by warmth as she tucked you into her forest-scented covers. You heard her shuffling behind you before she walked around to her side in a new pair of boxers.

She laid next to you, pulling you into her chest as you breathed her in, sighing contently into her skin. She smelled so fucking good! You grinned.

She must’ve felt it as she pressed kisses to your head, “What’re you cheesing for?”

You shook your head and grinned harder, nestling deeper into her neck. She laughed lightly.

“We’ll talk in the morning, okay?” She whispered out to you.

You nodded, eyes shut.

You dreamt of pine-filled meadows.

OOOOOOWEEEE alright bookies that’s it :p i already got ideas 4 the next part LOOOOOL so yeah gonna start writing that soon. hope y’all liked it and the wait 4 the real smut was worth it. lots to comeeee

hope its proofread enough lol i always think that it is n then i go back and see a bunch of errors

pt. 6

shoutout to my wittle taglist🥺 love yall so bad n thank u for being interested in this little project i created :D @fandomshitpostingqueen, @nymphetkoo, @sawaagyapong , @gold-dustwomxn , @amitycat , @nil-eena , @elsivy , @constellieationn , @letsreadsomesins-shallwe :3

#ellie williams smut #ellie x fem reader #ellie williams #black!oc #black!reader #ellie x reader #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams au #ellie williams x black!reader #lesbian #works 𖧧࣪#ellie tlou #ellie the last of us #scent of the pine. ̥*ೃ

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ca-suffit · 3 months

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The fact that discussing fan's disappointment in how 2x8 ended is *still* mostly centering Lestat in the conversation is v interesting to notice rn.

Here is what the discussion is leaving out

a) A lot of the original upset with 1x5 was from fans of color who found the fight (which at the time had no warning ahead of airing like it does now) triggering and didn't trust the show / fandom to prbly handle the story well anymore from the black side. a lot of ppl left or took a rly extended break, especially when the conversation quickly became about POOR LESTAT and nobody gaf about Louis. A lot of issues on both sides of ppl saying "get over it" too fast or saying if u still liked Loustat after this then u support DV and are fucked in the head.

b) There are no posts defending Armand the way that Lestat was / is still defended. There's rly no conversations from accounts in the tags that mention how these character's race changes affect how the fandom will view them and how it should be included in any analysis of them (as individuals and as relationships). There's no extensive posting about Armand's sad backstory so that ppl can "understand" his motivation. Nobody is comparing book and show Loumand. A lot of the attitude is just "yeah, Armand sucks [and what's why we like him] and Loumand was fake from the start lol." The fandom was defending NICKI more for his 30 seconds in 2x3 (slurring Armand, especially) than Armand is getting for being a major book character with a full book dedicated to him on top of it.

c) A lot of why fans found 2x8 disappointing is bcuz of how rushed and kind of silly all the "reveals" seemed. Not only did the show dump everything on Armand, it also says the whole Loumand relationship was out of spite, pls feel bad for Lestat now, pls understand that Claudia looked to him for help as she was dying, oh ya and here's Daniel thrown in out of "spite" too. We're not gonna rly have Armand fight or try to explain any of this btw, he's just gonna bail (see u in S3 for a huge tone shift into Lestat shit!).

That's....all a LOT to throw at the audience in the last few minutes and ask us to accept. I know the books and I don't doubt S3 *will* get into this more, but the pacing and choices made feel like shit rn. It's asking viewers to literally set aside the whole last 2 seasons. Ppl being upset is not bcuz ppl are "stupid" or didn't see at least the Loumand relationship dissolving. It's literally bcuz the show threw in last minute twists to explain things and tried to do it all in one go. Then we exist in a fandom that's all too ready to defend Lestat and remind us how "victimized" they've been and "I don't have sympathy for u on this, we tried to tell u this was coming and u ignored us." Here's an example of that under the cut.

#there's more but this is already long #interview with the vampire #amc interview with the vampire #interview with the vampire amc #iwtv amc #amc iwtv #iwtv 2022 #a vile hunger for your hammering heart #and that's the end of it. there's nothing else #loumand #armand #lestat de lioncourt #fandom racism #virginiaisforvampires

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abrunettefangirlnerd · 10 months

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Accident: part 2 Angsty/Sad

Request: JJ got hurt when he crashed his motorcycle and he woke up to see the reader sleeping, head resting on her arms, on the edge of the bed. She’s had a crush on him for years, but never told him cause he liked Kiara since kindergarten.

Read Part One First

There is a slight shake to my shoulder that darts me out of my slumber. Disoriented I take in the room and realize I am not at home but in JJ’s room. With JJ awake beside me, gently trying to wake me up. Shock overtakes me before I start to feel a smile creep upon my face. Immediately sitting up I wrap my arms around him. A soft groan vibrates from JJ and I immediately pull back to inspect him.

“Shit JJ! I’m sorry.”

“I’m okay,” JJ pants. “It’s just a scratch.”

Rolling my eyes, I want to call him on his bullshit. “Just a scratch huh?”

“Totally,” JJ’s smile matches my own. “Hey ahh, is Kie here?”

Kie. I feel my heart drop into my stomach at her name. Of course, of course he wants to see her. I’ve been the one at his side almost all night but who cares about that? Not me, obviously. I bite back the tears welling in my throat as I nod. I slip off the bed as I promise to go get her.

Clearing the door I press my back against the wall, taking refuge in the dark hall. My thoughts run rapid as a few held back tears flow down my face. Repeating my breathing exercise, I piece myself back together. I walk slowly into the living room where the others are each nursing a beer and passing around a joint. Their attention all snaps to me.

“He’s awake.” I breath out and I visibly watch their shoulders relax. “Kie, he is asking for you.”

Without a second thought, Kie is walking past me toward JJ’s room. I know I should take her spot on the couch but my legs can’t move. The other three are looking at me, waiting to see what I am going to do. I’m waiting too.

“Well, umm.” I avert my eyes to the ground, not wanting to see their pity. “I think I’m gonna go home. It has been a long day.”

“Y/N-“

“I’m okay, Sarah. Just tired.”

I make my way toward the door but a broad build with a half open shirt blocks my path. Too exhausted to fight, I just stand there staring beyond him. His warm hands find the middle of my shoulder blades and the back of my head as his arms wrap about me. The crack in my chest deepens and I can’t help the sob that whimpers from my throat. My knees buckle from exhaustion and if it wasn’t for John B I would be on the floor. On instinct my arms wrap around John B, clutching his shirt in my hands as I hold on for dear life.

I knew better than this and I still never moved on. I do know better, and things are going to change. Letting John B hold on to me a bit longer, I compose myself enough even I believe that I am okay. I convince John B that it is safe for me to leave and that I will see them all in the morning, I head out with the full intention of never caring that much about someone who doesn’t feel the same.

Click here to read the happy part

#jj maybank #outerbanks fanfiction #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank imagines #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank x you

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ultimateanthropoll · 11 months

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ROUND 2 SIDE B: I WANT TO SEE THESE TWO KILL EACH OTHER

Perry the Platypus (platypus, Phineas and Ferb) vs. Death (wolf, Puss in Boots: The Last Wish)

PROPAGANDA UNDER THE CUT!

Perry:

"People might say he doesn't count because he can pass for a normal platypus but he is clearly anthropomorphic while acting as a secret agent. Walking on two legs, opposable thumbs etc. And in case you are like my mom who insists he can't be interesting or have a personality because he doesn't talk, he can clearly communicate through nonverbal means (facial expressions, body language etc) as well as being show to be able to read and write. He also texted in one episode (I love the platypus emoji out of symbols here lol) I personally find him to have the most fascinating secret identity situation literally in anything. He has to hide his whole personality and the fact that he is even intelligent at all from the people who he grew up around and fully sees and his family and are the most important people to him (in the second dimension movie they show him adopted by Phineas and Ferb as a baby platypus). If they find out about that he will be sent away or they have to forget finding out. It's so unique because he's straight up a person like with human intelligence but he has to pretend to not be to keep is family which is crazy and honestly really sad. The second dimension movie is a masterpiece for exploring that relationship and I will never stop thinking of it as one of my favorite things of all time. Also when I was 13 Perry the Platypus was my first crush lol which sounds weird but like his theme songs literally says "and the women swoon whenever they hear him say... *perry sound*" So it's not my fault dhskhfkjsahf THEY KNEW WHAT THEY WERE DOING"

Death:

"i mean i assume 500 other ppl r gonna submit him but i may as well. he's soooo"

"He's gotta be in the poll, come on everyone was horny for this mf"

#WE'RE BACK BABY #round 2 #poll tournament #perry the platypus #phineas and ferb #death puss in boots #puss in boots the last wish

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saelterlude · 5 months

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link click musical list pt.6, (longer bcs i keep accidentally posting these early, gotta make up for the short pt.5)

also hi, this one took a while bcs i keep getting sad over not finding a Wang Yifei-Zhu Hanbin LG uppies clip :')

(pt.1, pt.2, pt.3, pt.4, pt.5, pt.7 here)

81. 24/03/2024 night, Zhu Hanbin wore his shirt inside out lol, there's a good chance it was like that the whole performance since LG actors don't change costume. Also, I love how Zi bowen shouted his name, it's cute.

82. Cai Lu's short vlog, includes Guo Hongxu and Ji Xiaokun karaoke, JXK being bad at basketball, and chilling in the dressing room.

83. 28/03/2024, Cao Muzhi getting manhandled by Cai Lu (I drew it hehe) and also giving the biggest laugh when he won first round of RPS against Zhu Hanbin plss.

84. 01/04/2024, Wu Hanglu bullying Bai Zhuoming, Du Guangyi being aggressive, and BZM being confused and overwhelmed in RPS. If you're asking why DGY shouted his line, it's bcs BZM and WHL were too busy bickering to beckon him to the couch like they're supposed to do. Also, they sing 'Dive Back in Time' together.

85. 29/03/2024, Wang Yifei, please stop bullying Wu Hanglu, don't squish her, look at her, she's tiny. See? Now she's bullying you back.

86. 05/04/2024 night, piglet is back!! Wu Yihan, Cai Qi. WHY ARE YOU BOTH SO MEAN TO THE PIGLET?? WYH does not let CQ play around with RPS (by not doing them at all)

87. 05/04/2024 night, bonus to the performance above. WYH does not hug in "Pursuing Light" for once.

88. 06/04/2024 day, New Cai Qi pair unlocked with Guo Hongxu. Awkward eye contact and GHX just assumes he won RPS when he didn't lol, don't you know CQ cheats? Also, Zuo Yiping looks so short between them, helpp.

89. 30/03/2024 night, Wu Yihan going *finger points* "whos singing the sofa song?", and Qian Dongyue's birthday!

90. 13/04/2024 day, I think, Wang Yifei scared Guo Hongxu with that overly enthusiatic jump hug.

91. 13/04/2024 night, Jing Yanqiao 21st birthday!! Let's go! There's actually a full video of your encore now.

Also, #90 and #91, both GHX and JYQ caught off guard by WYF and ZHB's mic cupping habit during 'Dive Back in Time'

92. 06/04/2024 night, I can't find a clip showing Wu Yihan drinking vinegar, but I can show you Cao Muzhi being cute as he walks across the table. And saying 'be careful' in 'Dive Back in Time' bcs something happened with WYH offscreen, i think he hit a camera.

93. 06/04/2024 night, nevermind! Shimmer to the rescue! Here is Wu Yihan drinking vinegar! (he Du Guangyi-ed himself (#19 and #31))

94. 14/04/2024 day, Guo Hongxu has successfully been influenced to cup their mics. Also, I'm now declaring that Guo Hongxu and Wang Yifei is the perfect disgruntled cat-oversized puppy duo, just look at their hug.

95. 14/04/2024 day, another POV of the performance above so you can see Wang Yifei nod approvingly once GHX uses his method.

96. 14/04/2024 night, just a shortclip of Wang Minhui putting Cai Qi in a headlock.

97. Event clip, mostly just explaining the basketball event itself but I wanna show you all Du Guangyi being bad at basketball in the last 10 seconds.

(speaking of event, the theatre is gonna count which actor scores the most during basketball scene/"Faith of Friendship". me and the musical brainrot gang over in the lc 18+ server are doing bets on which actor is scores the most by the end of the month)

98. 19/04/2024, poor Deng Xianling just wanna tie her shoes, stop bothering her lol.

99. 19/04/2024, same performance as above. English boy Teng Chunpeng is very excited abt basketball.

100. 20/04/2024 night, have Jing Yanqiao, shamefully losing 2-8 to Zhu Hanbin

101. 21/04/2024 day, Bai Zhuoming won the match, he teases Wang Minhui about it the whole encore to the point he messed up the entirety of RPS song lol. (Also, they got 15-12, they were conspiring together)

102. 22/04/2024, Shu Rongbo getting startled by Cai Lu's leg and Du Guangyi adding to the leg jenga is very precious, I wanna draw that. SRB also won basketball 36-0 bcs DGY is a softie granpa, I guess we knows who wins this month.

(and no, as much as i favored him, i did not bet on srb :') )

(also, did i wait for the 22nd so i can get at least 1 srb video this post? yes.)

*Please give a big round of applause to @shimmeringweeds for all xhs clips. I could not navigate that site at all.

Bonus time! Made a list (here!) of Zhu Hanbin and Jing Yanqiao performances the other day, thus that's the bonus clips you're getting for this part. Please check them out, they're really cool.

But I guess I might as well add this funny video of Cai Qi and Cao Muzhi performing 'Mia Famiglia' from Apollonia musical. It's gold, just for the fact that CQ acts as if he's in a drama while CMZ acts as if he's in a comedy.

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jefferson-starkid · 1 year

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An incomplete list of things I loved about the RWRB movie

First and foremost he total of TWO (2) lil bicep kisses Henry gives Alex (my hearttt I will never shut up about this)

Their faces when Alex gets cake on Henry’s coat

That whole scene actually. Comedy gold

Zahra straight up attacking Alex with a pillow for being an idiot

Alex looking and acting like a 10 year old petulant child during the whole hospital closet scene lol

Heny’s little voice crack when he says “I didn’t say ‘get me out of here’ I said ‘I need to get out of here’ there is a difference” BABY

on that note you don't wanna know the amount of times I said 'oh baby' to Henry during this movie :(

The eyelashes thing making it in there even though it’s not henry who says it in the movie but idc because Taylor Zakhar Perez your eyelashes sir

Alex actually grabbing Henry’s hips at the party to show him how to dance WE LOVE A BOOK ACCURATE MOMENT

On that note GET LOW

And Henry saying ‘Did he say ‘sweat drops down my balls?’ I hollered I love that moment in the book

Henry’s lost puppy look when Alex kisses the girls

Nick Galitzine managing to perfectly portray Henry’s mannerisms in the first kiss scene ‘Henry’s whole face grimaces in frustration, his eyes casting skyward like they’re searching for help from an uncaring universe.’ Like he did that perfectly

Zahra being the iconic queen she is

“You’ve been wanting him to dick you down forever”

EVERYTHING ABOUT THE RED ROOM:

the Alexander Hamilton portrait good job movie

Alex being nervous and not knowing how to stand when waiting for Henry (ik in the book this detail was after the state dinner in his room, but idc I love that they at least kept it in this way)

SHUT UP STOP TALKING

Henry’s horrified little moment of realization when he sees Alex isn’t actually gonna yell at him for kissing him but he’s actually into this like Nick Galitzine your face sir!!! It’s so soft and sad and adorable arrgghhh

The detail of Alex hitching Henry’s tigh up around him like in the book

Amy’s ‘oh god!’ when she walks in on them

Henry immediately pretending to inspect the book case and Alex randomly playing with the flowers all ‘ACT NATURAL’ lol that made me cackle

Henry’s face as he leaves Alex’s room and lingers in the doorway a bit to just…stare at him UGH

The rich white people sex dungeon scene with the polo and alex just shamelessly thirsting after Henry lol

PARIS

“Who says ‘make love’ anymore? Are we like gonna listen to Lana Del Rey while we do it?” PLEASE

That sex scene was handled with so much care. It was so soft and sensual and they worked their asses off to show their connection and it paid off lemme tell u everyone say ‘thank you intimacy coordinator’

Like I could talk for 45 minutes about that hand shot alone

How small Henry looks lying on his side next to Alex afterwards

FIRST BICEP KISS everyone say thank you whoever wrote that in the script

Henry’s disorientated ‘sgoingon?’ when Zahra wakes them up lol just like the book

EVERYTHING ZAHRA SAYS after she finds Henry in the literal closet

You could feel the ‘Zahra does not appreciate being told to chill’ radiating off of her Sarah Shahi you absolute genius

Their faces when ‘oh and I told my sister!’ :D ‘Oh I didn’t know that!’ :D ‘Yeah she was really happy for us’ ‘I can’t wait to see her again she’s real-‘ “OKAY SHUT UP THE BOTH OF YOU” lol Zahra is going THROUGH it

‘Would it make any difference if I told you not to see him again?’ ‘No.’ he said that so fast I’m gonna cry

Zahra calling Henry Little Lord Fuckleroy

Ellen at least mentioning the powerpoint even though they didn’t show it

Ellen giving alex the Queer Talk™

On that note ‘the B isn’t silent’ making it in there is so important to me as a bi person

Alex reading One Last Stop

I am NOT singing karao-

Cut to henry singing karaoke

HE DID IT HE SANG DON’T STOP ME NOW and he’s all smiley and real and open and Alex noticing it and falling more in love by the second

On that note Taylor Zakhar Perez your face sir

The lake scene (SECOND BICEP KISS HOLLAA)

On the deck when Henry is slowly realizing what Alex is trying to say (aka ‘I love you) and nick’s face just goes so desperately soft as he starts to understand that this means he’ll have to leave Alex and then his face just slowly closes off like NICK GALITZINEs FACE ACTING don’t talk to meee

That little moment afterwards that Henry spends underwater with his hand on his heart just…ACHING. Ugh someone kill me

Henry is my absolute baby can you tell

David first appearing. A real ‘and everyone cheered’ moment even though the scene is heartbreaking

‘Do you love him?’ ‘What difference would it make if I did?’ and then that sad barely there smile *insert captain Holt ‘PAAAIIINNNNN’ gif here*

“I stormed a fucking castle to look you in the eye and tell you that I love you, knowing that you wouldn’t say it back. So no, Henry, in fact, this is costing me everything.” LORD

”I can love you and want you and still not want that life. I’m allowed, all right? And it doesn’t make me a liar. It makes me a man with some infinitesimal shred of self-preservation, and you don’t get to come here and call me a coward for it” is one of my favourite passages in the book and I am so fucking happy they kept it. Nick slayed that scene

In fact their acting in that whole sequence was amazing

“tell me to go” NOOOO I love that they kept it but it’s so sadddd

The fact that they actually filmed in the V&A

Henry mentioning dreaming of dancing there with a person he loved and Alex wasting zero time putting on a song (cry emoji)

Henry giving Alex his signet ring like in the book, but then them adding that Alex gives Henry his key in return I AM UNWELL

That little montage of cute intimate moments between A&H during Alex’ speech

YAYYYY they kept the Zahra and Shaan subplot

“Yeah I thought you might see it our way, I’ll hold” QUEEN ZAHRA

BABY

BABYYY

And then Henry’s little breathless ‘Alex?’ STOPPPP

I’m serious baby making it into the film had me WEAK I had to pause for a full 30 seconds to scream into my pillow

Running towards each other on the stairs :’)

PLAYING PIANO TOGETHER AAAAAA

“I’m white and upper class so my affection comes with strings” lol at least he's self aware

The hand holding during the meeting with he king

“I love you” “I love you more “ “I think that’s up for debate”

Henry wearing the tie with the yellow roses of Texas :’)

In conclusion was the movie perfect? No! did I still love it? Yes!

#rwrb #rwrb movie #rwrb spoilers #nicholas galitzine #taylor zakhar perez #casey mcquiston #red white and royal blue

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quodekash · 1 year

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I FELL ASLEEP FOR A FEW MINUTES BUT WE'RE BACK IN BUSINESS BABEYYYY LETS KEEP GOIGN ON EPISDOE 9

THE WAY HE SLIDES UNDER THE WATER TO AVOID ANSWERING THE QUESTION

I LOVE HIM SO SO MUCH OML

noooooo dontttt

you should make outttt

nooooooooooooo

pleaseeee I just want you two to kiss and make out and be in love, and it'll be a LOT easier if youre stuck in a confined space with each other

YYYYYYYESSSSSS

SO THEN NOW THEYRE GONNA SHARE THE MOTORCYCLE???

EEEEEEEEE IM SO EXCITED

IM SO EXCITED FOR THE PUTTING-ON-HELMET TROPE AND THE WAIST-GRABBING TROPE

GOIUREDHSGPIOVKREND

he cARES ABOUT HIM

oh, what's that sound? nothing, its just me sobbing my soul out

bestie you're so in love with him

WAIT

HANG ON A SECOND

OMG

EVEN MORE SOUNDWIN/GUYNAWA PARALLELS

LOOK AT THAT FREAKING EXPRESSION ON GUY'S FACE

B O O M

aaaaaaaaaaaa soundwin/guynawa parallels may be the death of me

D U D E

this feels so intentional

nawa so badly wanted them to have a stargazing date

the way they speak in sync is so insane

they're like literally soulmates???

idk man, I think you should kiss. shooting star feels like a good reason to kiss

THEYRE GONNA COME BACK TOGETHER AND EVERYONE'S GONNA THINK THAT THEY SNUCK OUT TO GO ON A DATE TOGETHER OR WHATEVER

JUST LIKE IN MSP WHEN SOUNDWIN COME BACK AFTER WIN GIVES SOUND A RIDE FROM THE PHYSICAL THERAPY APPOINTMENT AND THEYRE ALL LIKE 'why did you guys get here together?? 🤔'

except this time I dont think they'll be as dense and stupid because the sexual tension literally oozes off of guy and nawa every time they interact

bitch did you not register the arm? bro is wounded and he obviously "didnt know where else to go" (aaaaa now my brain is going through classic enemies to lovers tropes)

broooo just kiss

you're looking at him so tenderly rn

d u d e

AWW, HE COULDNT SHOOT SOMEONE SO THEN HE GOT SHOT INSTEAD, AND ALSO LOOK AT HOW SAIFAH'S BUTTONING UP HIS SHIRT FOR HIM AAAA

the guy sitting next to you, that's what you can do

OHHHH

OH THAT ADDS A WHOLE NEW LAYER TO THE THEORY

well, not really.

but its a very interesting detail!

SORRY

IM SORRY

BUT WHY DOES THIS GUY LOOK KIND OF LIKE MARKIPLIER

well frick now im sad

o-oh

well frick now im SADDER

OKAY FINALLY

THEYRE FINALLY GONNA KISS AND ITS ACTUALLY GONNA BE GOOD

rfhghfghffhgbehsdbfhewbsdfhgaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhfebhgbehsbghbrs

YES

GOOD

YAYYYYYYY

FINALLYYYYYYY

guynawa's turn next pls

NOOOO DONT MAKE ME CRY WITH THE SHOT OF THE HANDS

FRICK

I love chimon's curly hair so so so much

B I T C H-

IM LOSING IT

THIS ENTIRE POST CREDITS SCENE IS FREAKING INCREDIBLE

I love cheesy pickup lines so much, but even more than that I love kang's ridiculously cheesy pickup lines, but even MORE than that I love sailom's reactions to kang's cheesy-ass pickup lines

so this is like. the greatest thing ever

yup

as per usual, for every single 12 episode bl ever, the actually insane stuff is gonna go down in episodes 10, 11 and 12

woohoo. can't wait.

(part of me just wants the fluffiness to continue but also part of me wants to get into the juicy drama of everything, you know? I love chaos so much)

WELL, EPISODE GOOD

I MANAGED TO WATCH IT IN JUST OVER 2 HOURS WHICH I THINK IS A NEW RECORD FOR SHORTEST TIME

and I shall be rewatching this episode once every single day until episode 10 comes out because I am feral 😊

goodnight folks!!

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blood-mocha-latte · 3 months

Note

hbowar ask game is sooooo good my girl. hard to narrow it down but let's go with b, d, f, i, m, o, w!!

thank you bestieeee it nearly killed me <3 <3

hbo war ask game

b. between all four shows, which one do you think did the best job of creating a storyline?

the pacific all the way. three intersecting stories, all individually devastating, all with wonderful character work. MWAH

d. what was a character arc in any of the shows that left you unsatisfied?

i said harry crosby here, but i also feel like the tuskegee airmen were Greatly Wronged in the sense that they just sort of. vibed. after their initial ep. which i get that the miniseries wasn't about them but Still. it made me sad

f. rank all four shows in order of favorite to least and explain why.

1 - the pacific: personal connections to the marine corps as well as robert leckie as well as the Actual And Realistic showing of war is just. so good. i hate media that begins to drift into not showing the Horrific sides of war and i feel the pacific is able to negate this the least. also with the old breed my beloved

2 - band of brothers: good ol' classic!! the besties the bros. do i even need to go into depth with this one.

3 - generation kill: the only reason this one isn't higher is because of Personal Connections that make it a really hard rewatch lol. but as with my reasoning with the pacific, the same applies here

4 - masters of the air: though parts of the series were still really good and well thought out, overall i felt the show tended to be more rushed and struggle more with characterization (through no fault of their own, due to the episode cut and struggles of covid filming) which led to it being my least favorite

i. tag some of your closest mutuals and choose a show portrayal from any of the miniseries' that reminds you of them.

and here we go to the read more, because this shit gonna get LONG.

~ @disastrouscanasta - arthur my partner in luztoye yapping crimes truly. you have luz energy and i say this NOT as a luztoye nor luz expert but based on the simple mathematic equation of a) my Favorite People b) Film Intersections and c) wonderful understanding of joe toye. thank you for your time

~ @ep6bastogne - bel i love you SO dearly and that is why i crown you leckie. YES web vibes also but i think that it's important to reflect upon the motivations of these men as writers and when i say the leckie energy differs GREATLY from the web energy and That Is What You Possess i mean it 100000%

~ @ewipandora - ewi my beloved ewi another partner in luztoye yapping crimes. among other crimes. i name you a delightful cross between luz and perconte, based on the simple and true and beloved fact of Bestie Behavior honestly <3

~ @gorgeousundertow - although we have not known each other for Long nikki i feel it important to acknowledge now that you are a bit like my guide. for i have seen the ever after light. much like i have been cured of a temporary blindness. much like dick winters can also do

~ @lamialamia - the strangest blend of ray person and doc bryan i have literally ever met. linh you go from ray levels of slapstick insanity to severe solemnity in like 2 seconds. and truly. iconique

~ @youcalledmebabe - gigi truly you have webster energy to me. those Web Vibes. WeVibes. genuinely though do you think webster would watch grey's anatomy

m. what do you think is the best quote of each show?

answered here <33

o. say something nice about a ship that you don't understand.

answered here <33

w. what's an hbo war url that you like/would change to? if you have an hbo war url, why did you choose it?

i said it in another ask but i will SAY IT AGAIN. boyetoye is a fucking hilarious url

#rie answers #yes the mutuals ARE in alphabetical order. it made my brain happy

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aois-amaterasu-painting · 2 months

Text

Black B- PASS- Special Issue - The GazettE - NINTH Reference book - (part 2 - song comments & lyrics translations)

1. 99.999

Uruha: "This time, since it's our ninth album, we wanted to make it a culmination of everything we've done so far. We wanted the SE (sound effects) to convey that as well, so we incorporated sounds from the SEs used in the past eight albums in a way that's noticeable. It was quite a challenge to collect all the past SEs, cut out recognizable parts from each, like 'DISORDER' from the album 'DISORDER', and blend them in without breaking the harmony. Overall, we aimed for an industrial sound that might be harsh to the ears when listening casually but would really elevate the mood during live performances."

2. Falling

Ruki: "We had already decided to make a music video for this song, so I had a specific tempo in mind from the start. The song was created with the visuals in mind. I told the video production team that I wanted to show a car crashing and being destroyed, and we developed the story from there. Initially, the plan was for a burning car to fall, but that was deemed difficult. We only make a music video once every three years, so I thought it would be fine to go all out this time (laughs). So I expressed my hope for the highest possible budget from the start. In reality, the costs were more about the three days spent filming rather than the car itself. Watching the car burn, I wondered, 'What are we even filming here?' (laughs)."

Falling: lyrics translation

Since how long Do you know how long it’s been? Together, let’s leap into the depths of chaos now so we can become intertwined Falling down Deep in to the dark

Distorted screams unraveling the past; I’m losing my Mind I covered my weary eyes Stuck in my head the ghosts of my past haunt me and drive me mad Where did I come from?

In those swirling depths, my thoughts may be an escalating contradiction but In those swirling depths, my thoughts are the cherished shadow of my former self

Scream if you can’t handle the crushing weight of rejection Suffer now that you’ve seen what you were like back when you’d lost yourself

We just believe in ourselves to die I know you were the same Together, embracing the same pain we’ll break It’s all right if we smash to pieces and scatter To be reborn again I’m gonna fall

Distorted screams unraveling the past; I’m losing my Mind I covered my weary eyes Stuck in my head this shrill, noisy racket

Inside me Something’s changing I see an ending Take it all in I’m gonna fall

I watch the sadness slowly disappear

We just believe in ourselves to die I know you were the same Together, embracing the same pain: it’s only temporary Don’t forget that this is not the end So come on, let’s open our eyes and fall

We just believe in ourselves to die

Sometimes it’s okay to be broken

...

3. NINTH ODD SMELL

Ruki: "This song was created around the same time as 'Falling', so they feel like two parts of a whole. This song went through four transformations before it was completed, and the fourth version felt just right. I wanted a really good guitar riff. It combines elements that evoke Nickelback, the generation of Skid Row, and our own generation's nu-metal influences. Next, we added visual kei elements. I think it will work well live, and it feels like a song that truly represents the recent sound of the GazettE."

NINTH ODD SMELL: lyrics translation

This soul can never die

First 「disorder」 is an ignorant blade Heresy raising its middle finger in rebellion

Reverberation running rampant heading towards the ninth stair of desire Second 「nil」 the future that tore through the darkness Nameless lights

The grim precursor soon becomes Stacked up, wriggling Rubbish

Draped in crimson despair crawling from the murky depths A tower of fear and doubt looks down upon the world

Poison gripping your voice as the days jumble around you Your heart painfully being sliced to shreds Exhilarating in the feeling of destruction Filled with strange distortions You fight your way to the 13th stair So embrace the black black black darkness

[Die] We fucking never die This soul can never die We fucking never die Can’t never die

Both hands spread wide take one finger away Moving towards the end But, still partially entangled, you’re held back from flying

And now here, joined together It's figure has taken shape Ninth: “The proof that we lived”

Until it melts and scatters Melting my rusted heart Our clamoring voices may reach their breaking point But we won’t stop as long as we can impact you So take it, take it, take it, take it

[Die] We fucking never die This soul can never die We fucking never die Can’t ever LIE [Die] We fucking never die This soul can never die We fucking never die I won’t ever lie

Worship the idol Inside me

...

4. GUSH

Reita: "The song has a rough feel and isn't the type to exert pressure. I think it's necessary to have a song like this on an album—neither too intense nor too quiet, but something that gets your body moving. It's similar to 'INSIDE BEAST' in that it's not particularly difficult and serves as a good warm-up at the start of a live show. The chorus also warms up the vocal cords. I imagine it being more suited for the early part of a live performance rather than later."

GUSH: lyrics translation

The thing that’s reflected in my eyes is A widescreen puppet But I wonder if you’re actually something more You’ve adapted to feeling out of place By wearing the world’s view of Normal Spouting out whatever you think they want to hear

Gush over you made good use of your eyes Gush over since you’re being judged by their rules Gush over when you turn to face them, they’re dazzled Gush over [they offer you] mindless wild applause

This high-end [life] is lively Compared to the one you had before But the impressive illusion is crumbling The uninspired solution of most of the world is just to Buzz Swarming to gather the sweet nectar [you provide]

Today you’re adrift, alone, in a swamp that can’t be completely disguised Your celebrity is only the illusion of breaking free and escaping to beauty

Your crumbling illusion is Dope

Gush over you turned and lavished them with your Vogue performance Gush over they’d devour it even if it wasn’t allowed Gush over with an adoring look in their eyes Gush over [offering] mindless wild applause Gush over you made good use of your eyes Gush over since you’re judged by their rules Gush over when you turn to face them, they’re dazzled Gush over [they offer you] mindless wild applause

Today you’re still alone in the swamp that can’t be completely disguised Despite that, you still seem like a decent person No matter what popular opinion may say

...

5. THE MORTAL

Uruha: "When I created this song, I was inspired by the theme of AI and a mechanical worldview, giving it a bit of a sci-fi feel. Choosing the sounds was smooth. We included inorganic voice-like sounds throughout, adding a subliminal sense of lifelessness to complete the track."

THE MORTAL: lyrics translation

She’s gone Cross a red line A quiet night That moment is pushed away What did you live for?

Lie on the color of sin Indistinct impurities sink to the bottom

She’s gone Cross a red line The remnants left in those hands

Laughing with innocent dead bodies and circling lies The hollowed personality, sculpted in superficiality Ugliness, ferocity, insanity, farce All around, the sound of bells Fills the air with contradiction and fades away

In hell Endless sorrow Unceasing pain that cannot be shed [One final] breath as I die, sinking down There is no answer

[She’s gone]

The day even laughter was stolen

In hell Endless sorrow Unceasing pain that cannot be shed [One final] breath as I die, sinking down There is no answer

...

6. Utsusemi (虚蜩; "Emptiness")

Aoi: "Utsusemi comes before Sonokoe wa moroku, serving as a bridge. It's not a transitional track, but it carries meaning in that context. This album must have been challenging for Ruki to create. Considering that, he placed Utsusemi in the best spot. Initially, I felt this song left a faint impression. We couldn't listen to the album in its final order until the very end. I kept wondering about Utsusemi, but when I finally listened to the album in sequence, it made sense."

Utsusemi: lyrics translation

I can't go back anymore No matter how many times the sun sets Even if I am burned by the dawn There is nothing left but this vow

If my wishes overflow, it hurts Can you make me forget somehow? Will I always remember nights like these?

Embracing sadness, in a dream-like state Scattered by the wind Even my reason to live I look for the pieces that I can’t pick up There’re only traces of you

Even if by enduring these wounds I knew I could see “the future” I still wouldn’t be able to smile I’m wasting away remembering My heart is unable to escape I’m simply blank Wordlessly they begin to fall These tears of guilt that flow I say farewell to you At the depths of the revolving lantern Every time I remember, I want to disappear

Alone, when the evening cicadas cease their cries And so I watch the reddening sky Trapped in a cage my love can’t reach [you]

Embracing sorrow, dissipating Even the endured days Barely resonate With the distant voice that encircles pain

Don't cry, it's over now The cicada shell that fell upon the sand was profoundly sad So very much like me

...

7. Sonokoe wa moroku (その声は脆く; "That Voice Is Brittle")

Aoi: "This song feels like it captures the delicate aspects of the GazettE. While the GazettE is often associated with intensity and rawness, there's also a delicate side to us. Creating a ballad best-of album reminded us of the beauty of these kinds of songs. Everyone carefully crafted their instrument approaches and the atmosphere of the sounds. It's a song that aims to captivate without being overly forceful, maintaining the unique feel of the GazettE."

Sonokoe wa moroku: lyrics translation

I’ve lost sight of “someday” Alone to the bitter end Weakness and sadness fill my heart Always more fragile than anyone else’s

Hey is there an end When will the grief disappear? If it hadn’t been for the promise we made that I couldn’t keep Maybe I could smile

What’s the use I can’t find it Who am [I trying] for I’m broken I’m just drowning in my dreams I can’t even see myself now

Pain piles on I’m pretending when I say that I’m not lonely I can’t hide the feeling of desolation and close my eyes Your words just…

Hey Is there an end When will the grief disappear If it hadn’t been for the promise we made that I couldn’t keep Maybe I could smile

“I want to be strong” My hope is that tomorrow will bloom with you

Hey Is there an end Sorrow isn’t eternal May the fragility I can’t hide Be just like this song

Pain piles on Worn out Too many years to count When I remember I want to be able to smile again

...

8. BABYLON'S TABOO

Uruha: "I want people to experience the world we created. I used various methods to bring my envisioned image to life. In the album, this song holds a similar position to '13STAIRS[-]1' from the past. It's a song that gradually builds up but retains a dark atmosphere. I'm satisfied that I could express my own unique 'darkness' rather than typical gothic or horror vibes."

BABYLON’S TABOO: lyrics translation

Spill it all Laughing at the forsaken in the vicinity What those eyes saw Was a feast discarding the weak

Sinister persecution Babylon’s Taboo Oppressed and uncertain, they remain bystanders. 「ADE DUE DAMBALLA」* Are you testing me?

「ADE DUE DAMBALLA」 Sinister persecution Babylon’s Taboo Oppressed and uncertain, they remain bystanders. 「ADE DUE DAMBALLA」 Are you testing me? 「ADE DUE DAMBALLA」

The glaring fiction and lies, Flickering in pitch black beauty. Reflecting murkiness, even the depths of the depths Fate I accept

This is Babylon’s taboo

Observing black eyes I can’t forget this humiliation Black eyes looking down [on you] I fucking can’t forget this day

In vain Even sanity has become uncertain This is a curse In vain Even releasing hatred feels uncertain. My curse

The glaring fiction and lies, Flickering in pitch black beauty. Reflecting murkiness, even the depths of the depths Fate I accept This is Babylon’s taboo

Observing black eyes I can’t forget this humiliation Black eyes looking down [on you] I fucking can’t forget this day

Sinister persecution Babylon’s Taboo Oppressed and uncertain, they remain bystanders. 「ADE DUE DAMBALLA」 Are you testing me?

「ADE DUE DAMBALLA」 Sinister persecution Babylon’s Taboo Oppressed and uncertain, they remain bystanders. 「ADE DUE DAMBALLA」 Are you testing me? 「ADE DUE DAMBALLA」 My curse

*In the "Child's Play" series, the phrase "Ade Du Damballa" is a voodoo chant meaning "Give me the power, I beg of you!" It is used for the supernatural transfer of a soul into a doll, transforming an innocent doll into the malevolent Chucky. This chant is central to the series' theme of combining human evil with the guise of a child's toy, driving its horror narrative. Damballa is a loa in Haitian Vodou, although "Ade Du Damballa" chant is fictional.

...

9. Uragiru bero (裏切る舌; "Traitorous Tongue")

Kai: "I think people of our generation will feel a sense of nostalgia when they listen to this song. It touches on a nostalgic feel that we've experienced. I'm curious how the younger generation, who might not be familiar with this nostalgia, will perceive it. Will they find it new? As for 'reverse diving' (a concert move), 'headbanging' has been mainstream, but I wonder how many young people understand 'reverse diving' these days."

Traitorous Tongue: lyrics translation

Daft’Back stabber’

I was drowning [in a sea of] viciousness stretching as far as the eye can see The last trick was the smile you saw that day

That face contorting into a twisted, grotesque expression is just…

[Daft’Back stabber’]

Am I still smiling? Tangled in a web of spite I fall into the trap of writing and rewriting, over and over again

[Daft’Back stabber’]

Are they all [just] an imitation of God? I don’t even have a tongue to bite off

Even when I wish for death, my dream doesn’t die my immense dream

I can’t hide the fact that [my dream] is just one big naïve joke

So we fall because of our mistakes, [but] 「We won’t die」

I can’t envision perfection based on my inexperience Even now, [nothing but] dull superficialities fall from Your tongue that just keeps on wagging Cultivated by your offenses

[Daft’Back stabber’]

Am I still smiling? Tangled in a web of spite I fall into the trap of writing and rewriting, over and over again

[Daft’Back stabber’]

Are they all [just] an imitation of God? I don’t even have a tongue to bite off

Even when I wish for death, my dream doesn’t die my immense dream Before long the remnants of time will reduce you to a crazy mess of loneliness, choking on your own tears

So we fall because of our mistakes, [but] 「We won’t die」

...

10. TWO OF A KIND

Kai: "To me, this is the most GazettE-like song on the album. It embodies the essence of the GazettE after absorbing various influences. The way the key changes and the overall structure is surprising and has a quirky feel. The part where the A-melody features a four-on-the-floor rhythm is a playful touch that feels very GazettE. Other bands might take a different direction, but this playfulness is our style."

TWO OF A KIND: lyrics translation

The scenes replay through my mind Blending into you, who is so much like me Negative feelings that I can’t wipe out Emerge clearly, as if resurrected The scenes replay through my mind Blending into you, who is so much like me Negative feelings that I can’t wipe out Keep repeating as if resurrected

Filthy, ugly me is still falling so violently This filthy, ugly voice is still falling so violently

Will these wounds from youth, forgotten yet remembered, Heal when we open our hearts to each other?

I already understand that ‘what’s right’ is meaningless Two of a kind souls, knowing the same pain Seemingly destined, they intertwined

Within our hands, wherever we go A clear tomorrow awaits, unclouded Each time we share our scars, the future we see Seems to sway and dance

This pain is given by fate

Filthy, ugly me is still falling so violently This filthy, ugly voice is still falling so violently

You exist for the cycle of rebirth, my only source of light Two of a kind souls, knowing the same pain Seemingly destined, they intertwined

Within our hands, wherever we go A clear tomorrow awaits, unclouded Each time we share our scars, the future we see Seems to sway and dance

We may be naïve But our hearts are joined as one Never to be corrupted

...

11. ABHOR GOD

Reita: "This is a notable song (refer to the band interview for more details). I think it will be the easiest song to get into during live performances, reaching the peak of excitement at the end. Whether we can share this feeling with fans will only be known after performing live, but I hope we can somehow make it happen (laughs). There were many keywords—fun, easy to get into, a bit intense, not too dark, and not too exhausting for the ears. It was a challenge, but we finished the song the night before recording the drums."

ABHOR GOD: lyrics translation

It seems this Light is being stolen away from me The Glow reveals the secrets written here Good bye Before regret begins to spread even more Let’s raise a toast [to the] Goat

Maze, God, Devil, My life As I’m crawling up from the bottom My song of victory rings out

Kill off My lust my pride My anxiety over and over again [My lust my pride My anxiety yeah]

[Come on]

I strung up my quivering, trembling nightmares TOO FAST TO LIVE, TOO YOUNG TO DIE I swear by the beat bursting my eardrums that I can still do it TOO FAST TO DIE

[Malformed] Malformed imperfect world

Kill off My lust my pride My anxiety over and over again [My lust my pride My anxiety yeah]

[Come on]

I strung up my quivering, trembling nightmares TOO FAST TO LIVE, TOO YOUNG TO DIE I swear by the beat bursting my eardrums that I can still do it It won’t end I even strung up my quivering, trembling God TOO FAST TO LIVE, TOO YOUNG TO DIE I swear by the beat now [fading] to embers that I can still do it TOO FAST TO DIE

My song of victory rings out: My life It’s my life

...

12. UNFINISHED

Ruki: "I love melodic songs, so this came naturally. However, it was only possible after 'DOGMA'. If we had been asked to release this after 'SHIVER', it would have been impossible. I restrained myself from making the structure too complex. The members advised against key changes and abrupt drops, which I tend to do. It was initially bright but gradually turned minor (laughs). It's a straightforward song, making it a bit challenging, repeating the chorus, and avoiding the impression of laziness. But this approach was due to the influence of 'DOGMA'."

UNFINISHED: lyrics translation

These shaky words I’ve crossed out so many times Will never be enough to fill my broken days So I engraved into my heart The value of your confidence and Your complete faith in me

You always put up with my tears And at the same time walked alongside me

I will take your precious hand And show you something more than dreams Together, we’ll take my silent wish into the future You have my word

I gather together [and treasure] these passing days And pour out all the love I have So keep believing in me completely I’ll stitch into my heart The reason for your faith in me

During that time when I ran away You were the light that shined on the path I took I can’t even tell you in words How many times you’ve saved this heart

I will take your precious hand And show you something more than dreams Together, we’ll take my silent wish into the future You have my word

Countless times I held tight to my hopes I want to show you the future

I take that hand and now we begin to walk

Until we finally reach eternity My fervent wish is to keep heading towards the future with you That will never change Since you are the reason I’m alive

All scans are from The Archive (rad-is-more) Interview translation is ChatGPT. Lyrics translations are Defective Tragedy Blog but I changed The Mortal, Utsusemi and Two of a Kind lyrics translations quite a bit. Babylon's taboo was a nightmare because I know the lyrics are wrong on the DT blog but idk how to actually translate it properly, but I used these blogs translations also ( 1 , 2 ), basicly I was looking at 6 different translations picking the best lines .... but the only thing I'm certain of is the dorodoro line... However after hours of breaking my brain trying to solve this I got an epiphany that these lyrics are about the black eyes that reflect both the black murky depths of his soul as well as observing the society at large... something like that

#the gazette #ninth #scans #ninth reference book #lyrics #talks #babylon #hearts

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sarahowritesostucky · 9 months

Text

📖"Merry & Bright"

Part 4 - Package Deal

Rated: Explicit

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Bucky Barnes

Tags: a/b/o, omega Bucky, alpha Steve, kids/domestic, fingering, anal sex, knotting, multiple orgasms, Voicing, claiming bites, D/s elements, mentions of PTSD, mentions of depression, postpartum, body insecurity, breastfeeding, mpreg, pet names

Word Count: ~7000 (I'm sorry, okay?!😫)

Summary: Steve and Bucky make love for the first time since the birth of their son.

(Or: a prime example of how even my sincere attempts at g-rated domestic kid fics devolve into 6000+ words of smut 🤦🏻‍♀️)

[“You want to know what it looks like?” Steve growls, pulling back with a filthy-wet sound and a voice that’s furious and rough-edged and determined. “It looks like the cunt of the omega who gave me my children. Looks like the cunt I wanna spend the rest of my life fucking, stuffing full of my cock, my cum, my knot … my tongue.”]

(Wait! I haven't read part 1, 2, 3 yet!)

Steve appears in the doorway to their bedroom after putting the girls to bed. “ ‘And the children were nestled all snug in their beds’ ,” he recites, making Bucky chuckle softly.

“ 'blah blah, something about a long winter’s nap' .” (Which doesn’t sound bad at all to him right about now.) “That took a while," he says, stifling a yawn against the top of Gabe’s head. “They didn’t get their hands on any sugarplums at that party, did they?”

Steve shakes his head. “Naw. Crackers and juice.”

“Juice has sugar.”

“They’re fine. Reading got ‘em down.”

“We still on Stuart Little?”

“Becs begged for an extra chapter,” Steve confirms, smiling from where he’s leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed, eyes full of affection as he watches Bucky feeding their son. “Did you have a nice time tonight, babe?”

Bucky winces first and lies second, so of course his ever-perceptive husband raises an eyebrow and waits him out for the truth. Bucky recounts the encounter with Karen and the other moms. “They wear me out,” he says, letting his eyes slip closed and his head dig back into the pillow that he’s got propped against the headboard. “Even when I promise myself I’m just gonna eat the food and not engage, somehow they draw me in. They have that knack.”

“Eh. They’re just a bunch’a cotton-headed ninny muggins.”

Bucky snorts. “Yeah well I’m not too far off from ‘em.” He feels Gabe slowing down and trails his fingers through the boy’s wispy hair. “Here I thought it was last week instead of this week. Seven full calendar days off track.”

“Babe, it happens.”

“Hm. No it doesn’t. But you’re sweet for saying so.” He smiles self-deprecatingly. “Neurologist said I’ve got too much white matter, now.”

“Yeah, and he also said it isn’t getting any worse. Lots’a people have brain injuries and manage to live perfectly fine lives.”

Bucky doesn’t miss how Steve substitutes the word ‘fine’ for ‘normal’, and his lips twist wryly. “I know. It’s just, all this time I’ve been blaming it on pregnancy brain, but that'd be wearing off by now.” He groans with his eyes still closed. “Swiss cheese for brains, Stevie, I swear.”

Steve makes a sad tut of disapproval from the doorway. Bucky stubbornly doesn’t open his eyes, but he can hear the soft sounds of Steve padding across the room, then the bed dipping by his side as he slides in next to him. “You’re doing great, Sweetheart,” he encourages.

Despite how much Bucky disagrees with that assessment, he can still hear all the love and warmth in Steve’s voice, can tell that his husband sincerely means it when he leans in and kisses his ear, lips and breath lingering at the craggy, mutilated top. It’s one of the ways that Steve has always silently said ‘I love you’ to Bucky when he knows the omega is in a bad mood, and it somehow manages to worm its way past his churlishness each and every time. “Thanks, Babe,” he mutters.

Steve wiggles in to sit beside him, hip to hip, mindful of Bucky and the baby and not upsetting Gabe’s feeding time. “... Did something else happen today? You seem, I dunno, burdened.”

“I am. I mean I’m just fucking tired, but yeah.”

His hand appears on top of Bucky's thigh. “Tell me?”

Bucky sighs. “Just my emotions goin’ haywire. Hormones. I went jogging and cried in the park.”

“Baby,”

Steve never likes to hear that Bucky’s unhappy, which is the main reason why Bucky avoids mentioning it. He’s got a therapist for that shit, after all. “Eh, it was brief. I got over it. But then I realized the play was tonight and I had to scramble to get the girls' costumes together; and right before that, I had to do battle with this snotty little beta at the pharmacy just to try and get my prescription filled, so that didn’t help.”

“What?”

Bucky ruefully recounts the incident with his birth control medication and the new FDA regulations, and Steve starts to rumble angrily in his chest before the story is halfway through. Bucky opens his eyes to see his Alpha looking all indignant on his behalf. His lips quirk. “Easy there, Big guy.”

“That’s ridiculous,” Steve growls. “I didn’t know there was any kind of legislation like that being considered.”

Steve’s unhappy scent is making Gabe start to pull away, and Bucky rubs the infant’s back. “Calm down. You’re making him squirm.” Steve grumbles but tries to obey, and Bucky relaxes when he feels Gabe go searching for another latch. “I dunno Steve. Things are changing, and I see the signs and it just scares the crap outta me.”

“What do you mean, ‘changing’?”

“Just ... the little things," he mumbles, knowing that there's a chapter in his book called that, and that Steve probably remembers it, too. Bucky shrugs, avoiding Steve's concerned stare. "A couple of years ago, people weren’t talking so much about church. Now everybody’s back to talking about gender roles all the time.”

“People are allowed to have religion, Buck.”

“It’s not just that. It’s people’s attitudes changing, their whole approach. It scares me. People didn’t used to always be talking about what was ‘decent’ or what was ‘allowed’ on this platform or that. Purity culture, moral absolutism; those things were on the decline, ya know? People didn’t criticize working mothers as much. Omegas didn’t wear their collars in public like it's some sort of fashion statement. 'Tradwives' weren’t trending on TikTok. … Abortion was protected.”

“It’s still protected,” Steve argues.

“Here it is,” Bucky says peevishly, because they both know about each and every issue that’s been kicked back to the states in recent years. “It’s how fast everybody forgets. Now those bumper stickers are coming back in vogue again, Jesus fish lapel pins. Hell, it’s even normal to launch a friendly chat with a chipper little ‘where do you fellowship?’ They’re banning books all the time—”

“In schools, not public libraries,” Steve interrupts, then hurriedly adds, “I’m not defending it, Buck. I’m just saying there’s a difference.”

“There’s a difference until there’s not a difference,” he snaps. Then, after a beat of fraught silence between them, he whispers, “Please tell me it’s not happening again, Steve.”

“Hey.” Steve shifts beside him, putting an arm behind his back to pull him closer against his side. He kisses the top of his head. “No, Buck. We’ve got intelligence agencies to fight against that, now. That’s what Shield is for. It’s what I do. You’ve gotta know I’d never let you or the girls—the kids,” he hurriedly amends, not yet used to “the girls” no longer being an apt descriptor of their children, “get drawn into a situation like that again. I’d never let it happen, baby, never. You know we have an exit plan if things get bad.”

Bucky nods, swallowing thickly at the mere thought of it. “Yeah,” he whispers against Gabe’s head. He knows that Steve only put that plan together to help assuage Bucky’s lingering fears, his anxiety that never quite goes away completely. “Yeah. We can get out. We have a plan.” He’s whispering it to himself, vaguely recognizes the beginning feelings of a spiral, how his pulse is faster than it should be, audible in his ears, with dread pooling low in his gut like spoiled food.

He whimpers and pushes his nose against Gabe’s hair to soothe himself, inhaling the new baby smell that he still has. “We have a private jet,” he whispers, reminding himself, trying not to let his thoughts flash back to the memory of the retreating rear window of his mom’s car at a border crossing, his sisters’ faces pressed against the glass as they leave him behind in a country where he's not safe anymore …

“Untrackable Quinjet, fly to Canada,” he murmurs, trying to focus on five things that he can see, smell, feel, taste and hear … about Gabe, his son, his—

“Baby,” Steve is mourning by his side. He grips Bucky’s shoulder and gives him a comforting squeeze, which pulls Bucky’s vision back into focus from the panic attack he’d been about to fall into. Steve seems unaware of it. He’s still just cuddling him and talking platitudes in a low voice. “That’s not happening, okay? Things are fine, I promise you.”

Bucky nods, even though he can’t help but to worry, “Then why are people giving up their rights again?” he asks. “You know they’re expanding the Fertility Care Act.”

“I know. But that doesn’t take anyone’s rights away.”

“You know how I feel about it.”

“I know. I know babe. ‘Incentiv—”

“Incentivization is the first step to coercion!” Bucky finishes for him. “Yes. They’re prioritizing citizens who can have kids over ones who can't. How is that fair?!”

Steve lowers his head. “It’s not.”

“And passing all these restrictive laws? Requiring my Alpha to cosign on my birth control? How can they do that?”

Steve sighs. “We’re still a democracy,” he says sadly. “People still have the right to vote for the policies they want, even if they’re not the same things that you and I want. We’re a self-determining society, babe. If they get enough support for it, enough votes … People still get to make these decisions.”

Bucky grunts. “Well they're making the wrong ones.”

Steve hums in agreement, giving him another squeeze. “Hey now, don’t think about that stuff. Relax with me tonight, that’s what I want.”

“Hmph.”

“You’re gonna turn the milk sour, you keep worrying like that,” he teases. “C’mere, grumpy.” He dips in and nuzzles against Bucky’s face to try and get a small smile out of him. It kind of works, and Steve hums happily when he feels him soften. “How’s Little man?” he asks, kissing Bucky’s temple and looking down at their son.

“Pretty sure he’s eating in his sleep,” Bucky murmurs. “And I’m about to be too.”

“Mm. But you’re not eating.”

“You know what I mean, dummy.”

Steve leans in and noses at his neck, scenting him affectionately. “You smell so good, momma. Smell like home, like mate.” Bucky makes a grumbling sound of complaint at the “momma” and Steve snickers and kisses him in apology. He cups his hand behind Bucky’s flesh one, intimately joining him in cradling their infant son’s head against Bucky’s chest. “Lookit that,” he purrs, and it’s not all innocence to his tone, as he stares at where Gabe is suckling. “I love to see you like this,” he murmurs. “Seeing you feeding him, giving him what he needs. Using that part of yourself for this.”

Bucky groans and lets his eyes fall closed again in mortification. “Steeve.” He feels Steve’s thumb start swiping back and forth on the back of his hand that's cupping Gabe's head.

“Shh. It’s true, momma.” Steve starts peppering kisses against the top of his shoulder as he watches Gabe nursing and Bucky blushing. He speaks softly between the kisses, murmuring intimate words of love against Bucky’s skin: “Love it. Love you. You don’t know what it does to me, to see you with him like this. Watching you takin’ care of him. Knowing that your gorgeous body can do this, can nourish him. The baby you made for me, my son.” His voice is rumbling again by the time he finishes, possessive, and he laces their fingers together and ducks in close to start mouthing at Bucky’s bonding glands—something which he knows turns Bucky on to no end, goddamn him.

Bucky groans and whines. “Are you serious right now?” Steve’s laugh puffs out against his skin, warm and affectionate, and Bucky drops his head to try and hide the smile he can’t keep off his own face. “Damn you, Rogers.”

“Language, momma Rogers,” Steve purrs, which only serves to make the heat in Bucky’s face worse. “Let me put him down,” he murmurs, kissing Bucky’s neck one last time before moving forward to take Gabe. Bucky hands him over with a tired hum, letting his eyes slip closed again while Steve is gone.

He’s surprised when he drifts off to sleep and the next thing he’s aware of is Steve crawling back into the bed with him. “Mmhh, I fell asleep.”

“I can see that.”

“He go down okay?”

“Yep.” Steve pulls him into his arms and lies down with him, kissing his forehead. “You make me so happy, Buck,” he whispers. He trails kisses down his face until he reaches his lips, then presses gentle pecks there until he’s able to coax his way inside for more. He makes out with him lazily, humming in pleasure as Bucky softens and starts to respond to it. He lets one hand roam his body, trailing up and down the omega’s side, then squeezing his waist. “You tired?” he whispers.

Bucky smirks with his eyes closed. “M’ always tired.”

Steve hums in agreement and kisses him some more. “He slept through the night last night.”

“Yeah. Don’t jinx it. Maybe we’ll get lucky again.”

“Want to fool around?” Steve murmurs, already kissing along his jaw towards his neck again. His big hands roam Bucky’s body, caressing his waist and circling behind to grab at his ass. “I miss you.”

Bucky sighs in pleasure, nodding. “I’m fucking tired,” he murmurs—very pointedly not a ‘no’—then shivers when Steve rolls over to cover him with his body, pressing one firm, thick thigh up between his legs. Bucky groans tiredly. “Ohh, Honey.”

“I’ll do all the work,” Steve promises, whispering the words against his neck in a conspiratorial way that makes Bucky chuckle. Steve kisses his bonding gland again. “Mmm, promise. You can just lie here and feel good.”

“Or fall asleep,” Bucky mutters, though as Steve presses his thigh down and rolls his hips, the odds of that happening significantly diminish. Bucky smiles with his eyes still closed and digs his skull back into the pillow, shivering full-body as he feels his dick waking up. “Mm, Stevie. Yeah. Make me feel good?”

“Course,” Steve whispers, before sealing his mouth over the sensitive tissue of Bucky’s bond scar. He hums in pleasure as he sucks hard, coaxing the gland underneath to swell and grow closer to the skin with arousal. He fits his teeth to the shape of it, biting in a quick, sharp nip that makes Bucky gasp.

“Oh! Steve …”

“You remember what the doctor said,” he teases, scraping his teeth over the spit-wet skin. “Hm? ‘Bout the ways Alpha can help you feel good?”

“Ohh, mm hm.” Bucky’s O.B. and his therapist have told them that stimulation of the glands can help relieve some of the effects of postpartum depression—including regular sex and penetrating bites from a bondmate. They've tried the latter but not the former, but Steve has been more than keen on the idea of helping his omega in both ways.

“What do you say, baby?” he asks, licking and kissing all over his bond scar. “Hm? It's all healed up from last time. Can I?”

Bucky whimpers, weak from the rush of arousal that always comes at hearing Steve ask for this. “Nnn,” he whines uselessly, rolling his body up against the alpha’s bulk. “Ssteve,” he slurs, “Nnn, don’t.”

“Aw, why not?” he coos lazily, still mouthing at that spot. “It’ll feel good, I promise.” He moves up to whisper in Bucky’s ear: “I know how hard it makes you cum when I time it just right.”

Bucky moans pitifully. He tries to remember what his reason for protesting it is, but it’s hard. “It’s almost—oh! mmm—s’almost Thanksgiving. W-we, um … T-tony’s parties, n’ the Turkey Trot …”

Steve lets his teeth drag over the glands again. “Fuck the Turkey Trot. So what? I love seeing you fresh with my mark. And this way everyone else will too. They’ll see it and they’ll know you’re mine. Know I was probably fucking you while I did it, claimin’ you all over again.” His voice is rough and gravelly by the end, full of heat and possession. “You got any idea how much I like that?”

“Hnhh,” Bucky breathes, unable to argue against that reasoning. “Okay.”

“Good boy,” Steve purrs, eliciting another pathetic whine from his mate. Bucky can practically feel Steve’s satisfied grin as he continues to nuzzle into the crook of his neck, mouth never leaving his bonding glands for long. “Smell so fuckin’ good, momma,” he groans, and this time rather than protest the endearment, Bucky keens at the way Steve says it: like Bucky being the mother of his children is the sexiest, most wonderful thing imaginable. Steve keeps kissing a path down his neck and shoulder, over his collarbone and chest, stopping when he reaches the level of his pecs and sealing his mouth to a nipple—the same place where their baby was nursing not even ten minutes ago.

Bucky shivers in sensitivity and blushes like a madman, his hands flying up to tangle in Steve’s hair. “Nnh, Steve, wait, oh …”

Steve groans and rubs his cheek against his chest, the drag of his facial hair and his hot breath making Bucky’s nipples harden into tight nubs. He brings a hand up to cup one swollen pec and mouths openly at the other, groaning as he stares greedily. “Fuck, baby, look at you.”

“Steve,” Bucky pants. “Nnn,”

“Mm mn, no. Hush. Just let me play with ‘em.”

Bucky continues to whine about it, but a hardening dick and a leaking asshole don’t lie, and Steve knows him too well to let him get away with such shallow evasion at this point in their marriage.

He settles in for the long feast, humming and grunting in pleasure between kisses and sucks to Bucky’s chest, alternating sides and squeezing whatever he isn’t mouthing over at the moment. “God, baby,” he says between one kiss and the next. “Wish you’d stay like this. Love your body like this. So soft, just for me.”

“Fuck, Steve.”

“Mmhm. Could keep you like this forever. All needy and sensitive.” He traps Bucky’s nipple between his lips and sucks, hard, and Bucky feels that tingly sensation and knows what’s going to happen a second before it does. His hands fly to Steve’s head and he cries out, but there’s no time for him to warn his husband before his body lets out a tiny spurt of breastmilk. Steve only pauses for a second, his mouth still on him, and then he groans loudly against Bucky’s chest. He sucks again, huffing in enjoyment, then lifts up and meets Bucky’s gaze with lust-blown eyes. “Oh honey,” he whispers, sounding devastated. “I almost forgot how sweet you are.”

Bucky’s brain is kind of short circuiting at the sheen on Steve’s lips, wet from his very own breast milk. “Shit,” he exhales shakily. “Alpha.”

Steve growls and drops back down to suck on him some more. Bucky can only lie there and take it, his head tossing on the pillow and hands gripping Steve’s hair as the alpha makes a playground of his chest. Bucky whines and complains, but truth be told there’s something small and squirmy inside of him that secretly loves it when his husband indulges in his body this way. It makes him feel wanted and beautiful, reminds him that Steve loves every part of him, even when Bucky himself doesn’t. “Leave—aah—leave some for the baby,” he eventually manages to say, laughing between pleasured groans and gasps.

Steve pulls off and comes up to kiss him, tongue swiping past Bucky’s lips and leaving the taste of himself behind. Bucky’s breathing shakily by the time they part, and Steve’s eyes flit over his face. “You okay?” he asks, so sincere in his care for Bucky that it makes Bucky want to give him everything.

“Yes Alpha,” he whispers, reaching up with his flesh hand and cupping Steve’s jaw with it. “I just love you stupid-much, is all.”

“Stupid much?”

“Mm, yeah, it’s pretty stupid.”

Steve surges down to kiss him thoroughly once more “See?” he teases, knocking their foreheads together. “All that moping didn’t curdle the milk after all.” Bucky huffs and swats at him, and Steve grins and rolls away. “Hang on one sec.” He gets up to undress, and by the time he’s crawling back into bed naked, Bucky’s kicked off his pajama pants as well. Steve slides right back into the cradle of his hips. Between their bellies, his cock is hard, but he makes no move to address it, focused on his mate instead. “What do you want tonight?” he asks gently, tracing Bucky's face on one side and then the other. “Hm? We can do anything you want. Whatever makes you feel good.”

Bucky softens, in love. That’s how it’s been these past four months: Steve being careful, trying so hard to respect any boundaries, to let Bucky take the lead as they find their way back to intimacy as husbands. Problem is, most days Bucky doesn’t know what he wants. He swallows thickly and rasps out a quiet, “I just wanna feel you.”

Steve hums. He tucks the recently-shortened strands of Bucky’s hair aside, eyes flicking from one ruined ear to the other, amazing Bucky with how his gaze never waivers with any hint of distaste at the mutilated flesh. It’s just love he sees in him. “I think that can be arranged.”

He kisses him, long and languid and indulgent, the kind of kiss that takes its time and never really escalates, more intimate than it has any right to be. By the time he’s kissing down Bucky’s body to put his mouth on his prick, Bucky’s a leaking, mewling mess.

“Ssteve,” he slurs as he watches his husband’s blond head of hair dip down between his legs and feels his mouth engulf him in sudden, overwhelming warmth. “Oh God.” Bucky’s eyes slip shut and he digs his skull back into the pillow, exhaling through clenched teeth at how good it feels. Steve hums from around his mouthful and Bucky hurriedly grasps at his hair. “Nnn, don’t,” he hisses, trying to calm down even as his hips are shoving up at Steve’s face. “Don’t hum like that, Jesus Christ.”

Steve laughs and pulls off to look up at him. He kisses Bucky’s cockhead and winks. “Sorry. I was just enjoying myself.” Keeping eye contact, he suckles and laves over just the head of Bucky’s dick, then uses his hold at the base to tap it against the flat of his tongue several times.

“Fuck.” Bucky pants and screws his eyes shut. “It’s been too long. I can’t hold it.”

“Who says you need to hold it?” Steve kisses his hipbone. “Cum as many times as you want to, Sweetheart. As many times as you need.”

Bucky groans. “That sounds like a challenge.”

“Maybe it is.” He goes back to Bucky’s cock, pushing hard at one of his thighs to force him to widen his legs even further. “There we go, good boy. Keep ‘em spread.”

Bucky peeks down at Steve and sees him staring at … everything.

Oh. … Oh.

He swallows nervously. It’s been over four months now, and he’s had the go-ahead from the doctor since all the way back at his six-week checkup, but Bucky’s still been self-conscious. They've resumed some recreational activities, but Steve still hasn’t asked to have sex yet. Bucky’s pretty sure he’s waiting for him to initiate. “H-how’s it looking down there?” he asks, trying to insert levity into his tone and failing pretty spectacularly. “Everything … everything good?”

“Mmm.” Steve caresses his balls, pushing them up and out of the way, feasibly so that he can stare at his perineum and further back to his weeping, clenching hole. “It’s winking at me,” he says, making Bucky’s face go red hot.

“You know what I mean,” he huffs, knocking his heel against Steve’s back halfheartedly. “How’s it … how’s it look?”

Steve hums and pretends to consider it very seriously, moving in even closer. “Looks perfect,” he says, a touch more arousal in his voice this time. And he’s so close now that Bucky can feel the heat of his breath against his skin. Steve’s finger touches just behind his balls and glides all the way back along his taint, up and down, tracing the line of where Bucky knows the stitches were. “All healed up,” he murmurs, sounding pleased. “Pretty and pink.”

Bucky snorts and makes a face. “Yeah, right. Don’t worry Steve, I’ve read all the reality check articles.”

“The what?”

“Stuff on the internet for new mothers. On how wrecked you are after giving birth. They say it’s especially rough on male O’s, and I’ve popped two of these things out, so.” He grimaces. “I think they have like, lasers or something that they can use to try and fix it, or at least make it look nicer.”

“What?” Steve sounds shocked. “Babe. What are you talking about?”

Bucky huffs, not wanting Steve’s false platitudes. “I’m just trying to be realistic, okay?” He squirms impatiently and refuses to look down at the alpha between his legs. “So? Does it look like … ya know, very messed up?”

Steve’s tensing shoulders and his low growl are the only warnings Bucky gets before his husband’s mouth is sealing itself straight over his taint and sucking ferociously, the accompanying rumble of his growl only intensifying the feeling.

Bucky yelps. “Holy fuck!” His body jolts in place, trying to bow off the bed, but Steve holds him still with strong arms wrapped around his thighs. “Sh-hit,” he gasps, “Steve!”

“You want to know what it looks like?” Steve growls, pulling back with a filthy-wet sound and a voice that’s furious and rough-edged and determined. “It looks like the cunt of the omega who gave me my children. Looks like the cunt I wanna spend the rest of my life fucking, stuffing full of my cock, my cum, my knot … my tongue.” He surges back in, taking turns between tongue-fucking his hole and sucking on his rim as brutally as he can, making loud grunts and groans in the process that are very clearly meant to drive a point home. “Mmph, mmm, hhmph!”

Bucky gasps and keens, overwrought by Steve’s words just as much as he is by the feeling of his mouth. He doesn’t even consciously think about it as he grabs his cock and starts jerking off, Steve groaning loudly against his ass when he realizes what Bucky’s doing. It only takes another minute of that before he’s coming, riding Steve’s face as his cock pulses in his hand and wets up his belly in spurts of clear omega cum.

“Oh God, oh, ohh …” His breath hitches in broken moans as he rides the orgasm out. Then the pleasure wanes and he slowly comes back down to earth, panting and dazed, blinking up at nothing but the blank plaster of their bedroom ceiling …

Until Steve reappears in his field of vision, having climbed back up to lie over him once again. Bucky welcomes the press of his alpha’s heavy body on top of him, accepts the slick-tinged flavor of Steve’s tongue when he slots their mouths together and shoves inside, demanding and harsh. “That was number one,” he says, when he’s pulled back and is looking down at Bucky with a satisfied expression. “How many more you gonna give me tonight?”

Internally, Bucky curses. He curses, dies a little bit, and falls deeper in love all at the same time. Meanwhile, externally, he regains his breath and meets Steve’s hungry stare. “I’ve got a feeling you’re gonna wear me out more than the baby,” he says, aiming for a wry drawl but only achieving something that sounds breathless and wrecked instead. He sees Steve’s eyes darken the way they do whenever he’s issued a challenge, and knows he’s in for a hell of a night. “What’re you thinking?” he whispers.

“I’m thinking: I want to see that again, and again,” Steve rasps, voice gone to gravel. “Thinking I want to watch you lose control like that all the goddamn time. For the rest of my life.”

Bucky flushes. “Steve …”

“I’m thinking: that I want to make you feel good in every possible way there is to feel good.” His lips ghost over Bucky’s as he murmurs, “So that you know. Because you clearly don’t—”

“Steve …”

“And so that you never feel like you need to ask me a question about what you ‘look like’ ever again. Not on any part of your beautiful body.”

Bucky groans and tries to turn his face away, But Steve catches him and guides him back with a gentle hand on his cheek. “Uh uh, Sweetheart. You listen to me. I want to make love to you. Until you can’t take it anymore, until you go soft and weak and cryin’ with it.” His hands start wandering over the peaks and valleys of Bucky’s body, caressing his skin. One hand moulds itself to the side of his neck, fingers playing over the texture of his bondmark, while the other glides down, pausing to stop and tweak a nipple, squeeze his waist, grab the fleshy curve of a hip. Very purposefully, he slides his hand to settle into place over his lower belly, hushing him when he feels him start to tense up. “Shh sh sh. It’s okay. It’s okay.”

“Steve, I’m … it’s —”

“Shhh.” He nudges their noses together, chiding and affectionate all at once, because he knows which parts of his body Bucky is most self-conscious of. But he doesn’t move his hand from the territory it’s claimed. “I know,” he whispers. “I know how you feel. But that’s all wrong, baby. And I want to show you.” He kisses him again, only this time it’s tender, almost achingly so. He relents and pulls back. “That’s all, Honey. I just want to make you feel new things, good things. I want to show you. I need to show you.”

“Show me what?” Bucky whispers, but then Steve stares down at him in that dark and private way that he deeply, intimately recognizes, and he regrets having asked. Bucky trembles and closes his eyes. “Steve, please. You don’t have to …”

“Look at me,” Steve murmurs. He rests their foreheads together. “I just want you to understand, baby. That when I touch you here,"—his fingers curl possessively into the too-soft flesh of Bucky’s stomach—“I feel something so profound, so far beyond just love or arousal … that I don’t even know what to say to you. You understand? It hurts. I don’t have words for it.” He looks at him imploringly. “You couldn’t be more beautiful than you are to me right now.”

Bucky’s heart beats faster at the intimate confession. He tries to suck his stomach in, tries to tense his abdominals and make himself firm, but Steve tuts at him and pinches the side of his neck, right over his swollen glands. Bucky gasps, eyes shooting back up from where he’d been starting to look down between their bodies at Steve’s hand on him. “I wasn’t.”

“Look at me,” Steve says, and this time it’s in his Voice, the sound of it sending an instant shot of arousal down Bucky’s spine and into his core. His eyes must show it, too, because Steve smiles and purrs deep in his chest. “Yeah,” he encourages, still in the Voice that he so rarely uses with Bucky. “That’s right. Look up here at Alpha. Do as you’re told.”

Bucky licks his lips, aware that his cock is rapidly hardening again. “Steve,” he breathes shakily. “I —”

“Pull your knees up,” he murmurs, and Bucky obeys without a second thought. “Good boy.”

A chirp erupts from Bucky’s throat, unbidden, and he colors in surprise at the sound. “Alpha,” he says, because it’s the only word he can think to say.

Steve smiles and strokes over his bond mark with the roughened pad of a thumb. “Does it feel nice? Want more?”

Bucky nods, blinking, the effects of Steve’s Voice still singing in his veins like a drug. “Yeah.”

They hardly ever engage in Voiceplay. It’s something Bucky enjoys with his husband, but he’s had bad experiences with other alphas in the past; times when men who weren't Steve assaulted him with what should only ever be used as a tool of lovemaking. Steve knows this, and so he usually avoids Voicing with Bucky unless he knows that the circumstances are just right.

The circumstances are just right.

Bucky whimpers and reaches down impulsively to cover Steve’s hand where it rests on his belly, but not to pull it away. “Alpha,” he chirps again, fingers curling over Steve’s larger ones.

“This okay?” Steve checks, his eyes scanning his face for even a hint of discomfort.

But he finds none, and Bucky nods his head in fast approval. “Yeah, yes.”

It’s still achingly vulnerable, having Steve touching this soft, imperfect part of him; but it’s intimate, too, and Bucky wants more of that. He wants Steve to make love to him this way, an Alpha with his omega—capital A, lowercase o.

“S’been so long,” he breathes, his voice hitching as his emotions finally catch up with him. Ridiculously, he starts to feel tearful. He’s missed having this with his mate so much. “So long, Stevie.”

“Baby,” Steve coos. “Don’t cry.”

Bucky sniffles shyly and tucks his face into Steve’s neck, feeling stupid. “Can’t help it,” he mumbles.

Steve’s fingers massage his bond mark and he kisses his temple soothingly. The hand that was on his stomach snakes around, dipping underneath his lower back and tugging them even closer together. “You gonna let me?” he asks. “Gonna let Alpha make you cum again and again?”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah? Gonna let me give you another bite, make it a good one? Mark you up again for everybody to see?”

Bucky whines and nods, drawing his knees up, wrapping his legs around Steve’s hips and tilting his pelvis to make himself available to his mate. “Please,” he begs. “Please, yes, Steve. I want it, please.”

Steve rumbles deep in his chest and slots their mouths together in a brief, aggressive kiss, then pulls back swiftly and manhandles him onto his belly, pulling him up by the hips into presenting. Bucky cries out in surprise but goes willingly, widening his knees on the bed and pushing his ass back into Steve’s groping hands. “Good boy,” Steve praises, Voice dipping down into that register that’s low and rumbly and lets Bucky know that his Alpha is very pleased with him.

Bucky grunts and wiggles happily until Steve’s hand appears at the back of his neck and pushes down: a wordless, forceful ‘Stay’ that makes him shiver and whine with impatience. “Nnnh.”

The hand flattens at his nape and slowly drags down the length of his spine, appreciative and greedy. “Aw, Sweetheart,” Steve breathes, hips rocking forward. “You’re perfect. Absolutely perfect, y’hear me?” He curses quietly as he digs his fingers into the fat of Bucky’s hips, watches his cock dragging through the wet valley of his ass. “Jesus wept, Honey. Lookit you. Wet dream come to fucking life, I swear.”

Steve only curses this much when he’s incredibly turned on, and the knowledge that it’s his doing has Bucky slicking up even worse than before. He whines and scrubs his face against the bedding as he feels his hole pulse and leak, the slick tickling as it trails down his taint and balls. “Steve,” he pleads, relieved when Steve grabs his hips and continues to take control.

“Shh, s’okay, you’re okay. I’m gonna give you what you need. Gonna take it slow.” His fingers appear at his backside, slipping through all the slick, wetting them up in him. He starts to press in with one finger. “Real slow,” he murmurs. He fucks him on just that one finger, for far longer than he would normally do, taking his time in Bucky’s body, in relearning this touch with him. Bucky makes a miserable noise against the bedsheets and Steve hums, pleased. “Yeah? How’s that feel, Sweetheart?”

Bucky whines and nods, his cheek dragging on the sheets. He feels Steve curling over him, his chest pressing up against his back and then the finger sliding deeper. Bucky moans as it grazes over his prostate. “Oh, God.”

“Uh huh.” Steve’s breath hits right at his ear. He plants his left forearm alongside Bucky’s, holding himself up as he fingers him. Right next to Bucky’s face, their pinky fingers hook together, flesh over metal. Steve kisses the shell of his ear and whispers, “Bucky, honey. You’re so swollen inside, I can feel it.” He strokes his finger, curling gently over that spot that makes Bucky’s vision go blotchy. “I want you to cum like this first,” he whispers. “On my hand a couple’a times. Right on Alpha’s fingers. Okay?”

Bucky sobs and nods. “Yeah,” he breathes. “Steve, please.” He can feel the orgasm coalescing already, the pleasure of Steve’s finger pulling him closer on every pass. “Please, please.”

“Shhh. Remember: slow,” he reminds him, and Bucky’s guts twist up in further delicious arousal and frustration. Steve doesn’t try to edge him, though. He lets him have it, working him up to it steadily, not rushing, kissing his neck again and again as he fucks him on one finger and then two.

That added fullness is what makes Bucky unravel, his body pulsing as he gasps and suddenly falls into his second orgasm.

Steve talks him through it, never stopping the whispered encouragements against his ear: “There we go. That’s it, baby, that’s it. So good.”

Bucky collapses to his stomach, and Steve follows him down, gently nudging his knees inside of Bucky’s to make a space for himself. Bucky complies, boneless from his climax. “Stevie,” he slurs.

“Right here, baby.” He presses up all along his back, covering him with warmth. “I’m right here.” His hands slide up Bucky’s arms and cover his hands at either side of his head. Bucky moans quietly as Steve laces their fingers together and gives a squeeze. “Hey, gorgeous.” He rolls his hips, cock slotting into place. “You’re so wet.”

“Y-yeah.”

Steve rocks leisurely against him and Bucky hums at how slick it is, enjoying the intimacy of rubbing together full-body. He lets his eyes slip closed as he soaks it all in: Steve’s heavy weight, his scent, the scratch of his beard and the heat of his breath in the crook of Bucky’s neck. He wishes they could stay like this forever.

“You feel so good,” he whispers. “I love you.”

“Love you too, Sweetheart.” Steve drags his lips over the sensitive skin of his bondmark. “Can I fuck you, baby?” he asks softly. “You want that, hm? Want Alpha inside of you?”

Bucky is glad that Steve can’t see his face, because his eyes are wet from pleasured, overly-emotional tears, and this way he doesn’t have to bother being embarrassed over what a sap this pregnancy has turned him into. He nods and scrubs his cheek against the bedcovers. “Yeah,” he rasps. “Yeah, Steve. Please.”

Steve hums and kisses him once more, before he reaches down and lines his cock up, dragging the head wetly across his rim a few times with increasing pressure, until it catches. Bucky tenses, because it’s been so long since they’ve done this, and because the last event of real significance that involved his asshole had been childbirth, but Steve soothes him with a sucking kiss to his bondmark. “Relax,” he murmurs, pushing in at the same time and making Bucky gasp softly. “Shh, there you go. See?”

“Ohh.” Bucky’s eyelids flutter as he’s slowly filled. “Steve.”

“Uh huh.” Steve’s hips kiss his ass as he sinks home all the way. “Juust like that,” he purrs, grinding against him and staying deep inside. “S’it feel nice?”

“Uh huh,” Bucky breathes, lips parted and eyes closed, brow furrowed at how full he is. “Yeah, Stevie … oh …”

Steve chuckles and kisses his shoulder. “You feel amazing,” he whispers, before he experiments with moving a little more. He keeps pulsing his hips, rocking languidly, gradually building up to a slow pace.

He fucks him gently then, not pulling back to get on his knees or gain any kind of leverage. Instead he stays close, deep; plastered to his back and dragging his cock against his sensitive insides over and over so perfectly. When it pulls a tortured moan from Bucky's throat, Steve encourages him with soft, sucking kisses against his glands. “S’okay.”

“God, Steve.”

“Uh huh. Juust like that. I remember how you like it. Alpha's got you, baby.” Steve sounds like he’s getting close, too, voice laboured as he grunts against Bucky’s neck. “You gonna, ugh, gonna cum again, mamma?”

Bucky whines and nods. “This time,” he begs. “Please, please. Do it.”

The two of them share a bond, and that’s probably the main reason why Steve’s able to tell what he means.

He doesn’t disappoint, either, fucking him smoothly right into another orgasm and timing it perfectly. As soon as Bucky’s body goes rigid and his breath stutters in his throat, Steve’s biting down hard over his bondmark, breaking the skin and piercing the swollen glands beneath. Bucky sobs and comes harder and longer than he has in a long time, crying from how impossibly good it feels.

It’s compounded by the sudden groan that Steve lets out and the rapid inflation of his knot, as the bite sets him off as well: “Nngh!”

While Steve is stuck inside him and lost to his own pleasure, Bucky’s able to rock himself to one more, toe-curlingly delicious orgasm before he finally lets himself go boneless on the bed, fully sated. He knows when Steve is done coming, because the alpha becomes more attentive again, his hands running over Bucky like he’s checking him for injuries sustained. If Bucky hadn’t just come four times, he might've been able to spare a chuckle over it. “Hey,” he says instead. “M’fine, babe.”

“Yeah?” Steve sounds pleased. He gives his hips a lazy roll against Bucky’s ass and nuzzles his freshly-bitten bondmark, groaning at the pheromones that hit him. He licks a big, fat swipe over it with his tongue, groaning and making Bucky hiss. “Mmm," he murmurs. "You’re bleeding."

“Duh.”

Steve growls. “Be nice to your Alpha,” he Voices, and Bucky shivers pleasantly. Steve notices the reaction and gloats. “Hmm. Maybe we should start biting more often.”

“How often?” Bucky’s halfway through a yawn as he says it, and he feels Steve shrug against his back.

“Once a month?”

He chokes. “Steve!”

“What?” Steve’s snickering. “I like a well-scarred bondmark. S’romantic.”

“It’s fucking primeval is what it is, you caveman.” Bucky scolds, rolling his eyes. He clenches down purposefully hard on Steve’s knot, smiling at the surprised—Hngnn!—he gets for it. “We already do it on our anniversary every year.”

“And sometimes on Valentine’s,” Steve supplies.

“Exactly. Any more than that and people’ll think we have a fetish.”

“Well, maybe we do,” he purrs, kissing the bite. “And it is what the medical professionals are recommending, after all.”

“Ha, yeah.”

“... You’re really okay though?” Steve checks. “None of that bothered you? The Voicing, or the—”

“Shh. No. I loved it.” Bucky lets his eyes fall closed. He can still feel his pulse thrumming beneath his skin, bringing the delicious ache and throb of his glands to the forefront. “Every part of it,” he sighs.

Steve laces their fingers together. “Good. ‘Cause I take doctor's orders very seriously, you know.” He rumbles deep in his chest and gives a dirty grind against their tie. “We gotta keep you healthy, Buck. Gotta make sure you’re properly … stimulated.”

“You suck so bad,” Bucky groans. “Your permission to know my medical information is rescinded.”

“Aw, don’t be that way. I can dick you down again in like, an hour, if you want? Probably. Two hours, tops.”

Bucky yawns, humming as he pretends to consider it. “Tempting offer, but how ‘bout you cuddle me ‘till I pass out, instead?” he says, because he really does think the other night was a fluke, and that he’s destined to be awakened by a baby monitor within the next few hours. Steve wraps his strong arms around him and pulls them to lie on their sides. They spoon like that and enjoy the closeness while they wait for Steve’s knot to go down. Bucky gets goosebumps when Steve starts caressing lazily up and down his side. “Mm, that’s nice.”

“Mmhm.” Steve slots his fingers into the trigger points for the prosthetic. “Let’s take this off,” he whispers, kissing the shell of his ear.

It’s Bucky’s fucked up ear—a place where he’s usually squirmy and uncomfortable about Steve touching, let alone kissing, but right now it doesn’t bother him at all. Too many endorphins surging through his system, he supposes.

“Okay,” he agrees, since he doesn’t really love sleeping with the arm on anyway (he’s got this paranoia that one day he’ll sleep-punch Steve in the middle of a nightmare or something), and then lies there and listens to the sounds that the arm makes as it’s triggered to disengage from his body. He can’t actually feel anything other than some vague, mechanical movements deep in the arm’s very internal workings. It doesn’t hurt. And then it comes off, a sudden release of weight and tension that Bucky hadn’t even realized was there. He moans quietly at the feeling. “Nnh. Thanks Stevie.”

“You’re welcome.” Steve sets the arm out of the way and resumes his gentle stroking and caressing along Bucky's side, venturing up higher to where the anchor site for the arm begins, implanted permanently into his body.

Bucky can sense his husband looking down at it, can feel the pads of his fingers exploring thoughtfully over the texture of scars and metal edging. He sighs, feeling wistful. “Do you ever wonder what it would’ve been like, if we’d met before?”

Behind him, Steve stills. He’s quiet for a long moment, and just when Bucky thinks he’s not going to answer at all, his caressing starts back up again and he hooks his chin over Bucky’s shoulder. “Sometimes, in a general way," he admits. "But then ... it wouldn't be the you I fell in love with, would it? We wouldn’t be us.” He worms his other arm under his waist and hugs them closer together. “Maybe we’d have less nightmares between the two of us, less therapy,"

Bucky snorts.

"But I wouldn’t choose anything but this. Nothing would be the same if we hadn't met the way we did, y'know? You probably would’ve stayed in college, focused on your career, maybe put off kids too long. I wouldn't have joined Shield, Peggy wouldn't have moved away.” He kisses the ruined edge of Bucky’s ear again, so tender and slow that Bucky knows he’s doing it intentionally. “Just think: Becca wouldn’t exist. And we wouldn’t have Sarah or Gabe, 'cause you and I never would’ve met.”

“We might’ve.”

“Mm, doubtful.”

Bucky grumbles, displeased at that hypothetical, and Steve hugs him and coos in agreement, “Shh. I know, I know. That would be awful. I’m just saying: you can’t trade the good for the bad. It’s a package deal. And you know what? I’m happy with my package.” He seals his mouth to the fresh bite wound and gives a powerful suck, popping off with a wet sound and a pleased growl. “Very very happy with my package.”

Bucky’s too gooey and in love and fucked out to get the delivery just right, but he at least manages to wiggle his butt against their tie and mutter out a tired but saucy little, “Mmm, yeah. I like your package, too.”

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