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plan-3-tmars · 8 months

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Is this what Happiness is?

- hey so I haven't seen an interpretation of the bar scenes in Half that I fully agree with, so I wanted to throw my own two cents out there into the void and pray that it makes sense !!!

so, in the bar scenes in Half we see what I interpret as a hangout with old friends (or, hangout with old friend + his wife.) These scenes used to be the biggest piece of evidence for the cheater theory, but now that that's been debunked by the man himself, I have a new way of looking at them

~ before I go any further, I just wanted to say that I'll be calling the brown-haired woman whiskey for simplicity's sake

In this scene, Kazui turns to look at Whiskey, saying the lyrics:

"laughing together, side by side, this distance in our relationship is misleading me, is this what happiness is?"

With my guess (cuz that's really what it is there's no evidence for it) that Whiskey is the Bartender's wife i think this scene is Kazui being conflicted with what he's been told is true, that marrying Hinako is "true love", versus what he feels is true, that marrying Hinako has brought distance into their relationship.

He looks at Whiskey, a woman happily married, and wonders why his relationship with Hinako isn't like that.

~ shout out to @prisoner-000 for the following screenshot

in this post he points out that Hinako and Kazui's rings are silver in Cat, not gold like they were in Half, yet Bartender's ring colour stays the same.

For the sake of this writing I'm going to go with the first meaning they put out, that Bartender's ring is gold because his marriage is genuine.

But wait!! I hear you ask. This is Half and Kazui's ring is still gold in Half!! EXACTLY MY FRIEND!!

Kazui's ring IS still gold in Half because at the time of these scenes he's still fooling himself that this relationship is good, that he will eventually garner real romantic feelings for Hianko.

"laughing together, side by side, this distance in our relationship is misleading me, is this what happiness is?"

Remember this lyric that plays during the Whiskey -> Hinako scene. You know what other scene in Half this lyric reminds me of?

laughing together, side by side,

this distance in our relationship is misleading me,

is this what happiness is?

He's beginning to doubt if what he believes is true, he's beginning to believe the feelings telling him something's wrong (and remember, the scene right after this one is when he confesses (?) his secret to Hinako) ARE infact true, and that maybe the logic he's been following for so long has a couple holes in it.

I think these scenes are meant to show Kazui gradually realising that his relationship with Hinako will not work out. It just won't, no matter how hard he tries.

He's able to laugh together and talk with Whiskey because she's his friend, yet he can't do the same with his own wife? Even though, according to his gold ring, their relationship is supposed to be real and true and genuine?

#thats not even getting into the gay theory implications btw #bar kazui staring at audience kazui with the lyrics “all these memories and you / only if i could erase them”#because his crush on his friend literally haunts him and his relationship with hinako (the green apple)#confessing his love to his friend “just so its out in the open” because he so desperately needs to get it off his chest #most likely having his feelings not reciprocated as his friend his married and staring at his wife #who then transitions into hinako / wondering why he does not feel the same happiness with her than he does at the bar #because he's lying to himself and he's lying to her #he *knows* that their relationship is not happiness and yet he hides in denial #because it's not like he will be able to find his happiness anyway as his friend is already taken #sorry #this doesnt rlly make sense and i'm aware of that i wish i could beam what im trying to get at into ur head #unfortunately its nearly 11pm and when i was brainstorming this idea i had a nap and NEVER WROTE MY THOUGHTS DOWN (biggest mistake ever)#someone with a bigger vocabulary pls come and pick this up and explain it better thank youuuy #anyway just hope you get what im trying to say #thats all #sorry for the ramble in tha tags but also this is my house so #milgram #kazui mukuhara #hinako mukuhara #milgram theory #ig i never know what to title these

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mrsfrecklesmarauders · 2 months

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The flower chain necklace

Remus saw the little sparkling chain hanging in front of him and he immediately knew this was a bad idea.

"I cannot do it" he shook his head.

"You said it you would!"

"This is a beautiful chain! You should give it to her yourself"

It was a breathtaking necklace. With a beautiful flower chain. It looked expensive. Way out of Remus's budget. And knowing James, it probably had some precious metals somewhere.

Lily's seventeenth birthday was approaching. Remus really liked the girl. She was his best female friend. And he already got her a nice book he thought she might enjoy. Nothing fancy.

Now James, the golden boy, had come and shown Remus what he got for Lily. It was the kind of gift that would take any girl's breath away. It certainly had taken Remus's breath away. But when he commented on how amazing it was, James said: "Glad you like it. Because you're giving this to her for me". Remus had choked on his saliva.

"Again, why don't you give it to her yourself?" Remus asked "It would surely add some points with her. You might have her snogging you by the end of the night"

James laughed as he got a little red.

"If it would be that simple with her, I would definitely do it, Moony" he sighed "But she hates me. And if I give this to her, she won't accept it"

Remus twisted his mouth. Ever since he had met James, he had been head over heels for Lily. And since Remus got close to her, he promised the boy to help him with her.

Remus was the only one who listened to James mumble about Lily or told him things he'd been learning about Lily during the time he spent with her.

"I picked this with my mum over Christmas break..."

"You've got this since Christmas?" How adorable was that?

"Yeah" James rubbed his neck in embarrassment "I didn't know how to give it to her. But her birthday seems like a better occasion to do it..." then he looked at Remus "I mean, for you, her best friend to give it to her"

"James..."

"Please Moony" Oh God, James was pouting "I spent a lot of money on this..."

Of course he did.

"I know she will like it and wear it but not coming from me" James added "But she will, coming from you!"

Remus was noticing James had long eyelashes as he batted them at him.

"She will never believe I have the money to buy something like this" Remus replied.

"You're a smart boy, Moony" James said "Make something up"

"But....I....."

"Pleeeaseee Mooonyyy!!"

As James begged with his hands, Remus thought he and Sirius were too similar in many things.

"I really think you should do it yourself..."

"Moooons!!" James chanted

"You have the best opportunity to win her heart!" Remus used the same tone.

"I just want her to see her happy face when she receives the necklace" James sighed "I just want to see her happy"

Remus smiled. If Lily knew this James, the amazing person he actually was, a true gentleman, Remus was sure she would fall for him. Lily was waiting for her prince charming when he was right there.

God, both of them were so stubborn.

"So, Remus? Are you my mate or not?" James added raising an eyebrow "A Marauder should help his fellow Marauder in anything!"

That made Remus laugh. Ever since he arrived to this school and met the boys, he wanted to belong with them. Be a true Marauder. And even if they treated Remus as such, he knew they had more history. Sometimes he was an intruder. So making James happy with this was tempting.

Remus wanted James to like him. He was so cool. Remus understood why Sirius was obsessed with him.

Remus took a deep breath. James was still pouting and moving his eyelashes that looked bigger behind those glasses. And damn, James was handsome and he had a very convincing face.

"Fine..." Remus said.

But he couldn't continue for James was already attacking him with a tight hug that was leaving him out of breath and several kisses on his forehead and cheek that made Remus blush for some reason.

"Thank you...." Kiss "Thank you...." kiss "Moony!" kiss, kiss "I knew you were a good friend" Wet kiss that made Remus push him away and wipe his cheek "Sirius is right! You are amazing!!"

Remus blushed even more to hear that compliment from Sirius.

Remus giggled happily.

"I still think you should give this to Lily yourself, though..."

James sighed "Blah blah blah... You are my friend, Remus. Not my conscious"

Remus nodded in defeat "Fine"

"And Remus" James put an arm around his neck, pulling him closer "Not a word of this to anyone..." he sounded dead serious when he said it "Not even to Sirius. For as long as it concerns you, you are the one that got this necklace for Lily... Okay?" he even put a finger on his chest "You'll take this to your grave"

Remus was a bit overwhelmed of how secretive and serious this all sounded. He thought he was screwed, wasn't he?

"Yeah ok..."

He received another wet kiss on the cheek and that was the way their pact was sealed.

The day of Lily's birthday party, the necklace box was burning inside his pocket. And James's gaze was burning his back anywhere he went.

Lily was beautiful as always. She was dancing with Luke Gardener, a bloke Lily had told him she potentially fancied. Remus observed them dancing and thought how wrong they fitted and how well she would look with James.

But James was dancing with another random girl Sirius had introduced him.

If Remus was allowed to tell both of them a lot of things he knew, they would surely be together. Remus was a coward. He cared about both of them. But he wasn't that confident or intelligent to make a plan. Plus he believed they had to realize it for themselves. Scheming something would only bring them apart.

Remus sighed as he finished his drink.

"Moony!! Why the long face?"

As James had begged, Remus hadn't told a soul about their pact. He actually forgot until that morning when James gave him the box. But Sirius didn't know. Remus understood why James didn't trust his best friend with that secret. Sirius had been trying nonstop to set James up with random girls. According to Sirius, James was young, handsome, funny and athletic, (true), and he didn't deserve to be pining after the same girl. Even more if Lily was insulting him all the time.

Sirius wasn't a romantic. And having a huge crush on someone like that was a bloody nightmare.

"Aren't you enjoying The Ginger's party?"

"Oh Sirius, you know how much I am the life of parties" Remus answered sarcastically which made Sirius laugh "Just give five more minutes and I'll be on the center of the floor"

"I'll take that as a promise" Sirius winked "Seems like the birthday girl is having fun"

Remus followed Sirius’s gaze to see Gardener's large hands on Lily's waist. She looked red as her hair and kind of embarrassed as she put her arms on his shoulder. She even smiled.

Remus immediately turned to look at James who seemed sad, eyes on Lily and not even on the girl dancing her butt out in front of him.

"Don't worry, Moony" Sirius added, looking at his expression "James will be fine with Crazy-Tongue Danielle"

"Crazy-Tongue?" Remus raised an eyebrow.

"Rumor has it she does wonders" Sirius smirked "Not that I know" he added as Remus frowned unconsciously "I decided to leave her to Prongsie"

"So generous of you" Remus tutted "He's into Lily, though"

"His obsession will go away when he travels in a waters of free pussy"

Remus groaned in disgust "You're so disgusting sometimes, Pads"

Sirius was laughing.

"And it is not just obsession what James feels... Trust me"

He wanted to tell Sirius about the great gesture that his best friend was doing for the girl of his dreams. But unfortunately he couldn't.

"Life is not like those romantic books you adore to read, Moons"

Of course, the boy Remus fancied would never do something like that for him. Maybe for anyone. Remus knew he was capable of loving. He just chose to act like a dick sometimes.

To prove Sirius’s words, another song started playing that made every girl scream. And this song was not romantic. It was about sex, women's bodies and other horrible stuff that made Remus want to puke.

It was upbeat and mostly every girl went crazy with their slut dancing. Remus was about to offer Sirius to go and smoke somewhere, when they saw Alecto Carrow opening her way to the center of the dance floor. All eyes turned to her because she was pretty and a really good dancer. Even Sirius was looking... Even Sirius was looking.

Alecto noticed Sirius and she walked directly towards him and began dancing right in front of him. Remus didn't understand where did she get that confidence.

She even laughed when she tripped and dropped to the floor with a loud gasp.

Sirius bent over her.

"Are you okay, sweetheart?" he asked.

"Better now that my own angel came to my rescue"

Sirius smiled. His cheeks slightly red.

"Oh God! Al, are you okay?"

Now Alecto's friends were all over her, trying to get out of the floor.

"Did she hit her head?"

"Is she breathing?"

"She probably needs CPR"

"Maybe Sirius can do the honors" Alecto answered with a smile. Sirius blushed again.

"She is just bloody drunk" Dorcas snapped with patience "Come on, babe. Let's take you to the dorm"

"Maybe Sirius can be a gentleman and make sure she gets there alright" Alice said with a tiny smile "Looks like she hit her head"

"Don't worry... She is that stupid"

Remus almost laughed to Marlene's comment. He realized that there was a little group of people who were watching the scene. Lily included.

"And no matter what you do, darling, your style is always awful" Alecto replied.

Marlene clenched her teeth when she noticed Dorcas and immediately blushed.

"Come on, Al" Sirius spoke to everyone's surprise "I'll take you to your dorm"

Not only Alecto seemed surprised, but her friends as well, and even Remus. He was used to see Sirius with girls. But that didn't mean he felt as if his heart was being stepped on everytime.

"Oh, such a gentleman" Alecto seemed like she was beaming as Sirius grabbed her hand and dragged her away.

Remus saw Marlene rolling her eyes and he was tempted to do the same.

"Sirius strikes again" Mary commented, making Remus have an unpleasant twist inside his stomach.

As the party resumed to its normality, Remus was feeling worse and worse.

"Moony! Did you do it?"

"Ha?" Remus turned to James trying to blink his pain away.

"Did you give her my present?" he asked "I mean, YOUR present"

Remus took a moment to remember what was James referring to.

"No"

"What happened?"

"Didn't you see how Alecto fell to the floor?"

James raised an eyebrow.

"Sirius took her to her room" It was even more painful to say it.

"Cheeky bastard" James laughed. "She's been into him for ages"

Remus pretended to snort but it sounded like a wounded kitten.

"Where were you anyway?"

"Crazy-tongue Danielle took me to the loo"

Remus wasn't surprised.

"Just a quick snog" James explained as he rubbed his hair in embarrassment.

"Nice" What was Remus supposed to say?

"Anyway, it's almost midnight"

"So?"

"So?" James asked "Lily's official birthday! Go and give her the present!"

Remus was going to protest but James pointed behind him.

"Look she is going for a drink" he exclaimed "Do it when the vulture of Gardener is not around... And make sure I get to see her face"

"Want me to prepare dinner for you as well?" Remus snapped back.

"I already ate" James shrugged not understanding the joke. Then pushed Remus from his shoulders "Just go!! Nooow!"

Remus was practically pushed towards Lily. The rest of the way he made it himself.

Remus sighed. He was really doing this.

Lily, was not drinking alcohol but she was gulping a large glass of water as if she wanted to forget about her problems.

"Hey gorgeous"

Lily almost choked with her drink.

"Remus!!" she smiled widely "God! I am so glad to see you!"

She said it as she side glanced at Luke. It looked as if he wanted to approach but wasn't sure now that Remus was near Lily.

Remus laughed "We saw each other like 40 minutes ago when I told you Happy Birthday"

"Yeah, right" Now Lily was giving a slight smile to Luke.

"Everything alright?"

"Yeah?"

Remus just looked at her.

Lily closed her eyes and shook her head.

"I don't know, Remus" Lily bit her lip "Luke tried to kiss me just now!"

"Oh!"

"It wasn't even in a romantic song or anything. He tried to grab my waist and kissed me right there! I mean I know that he is a boy and everything but it just seems kind of awful to have the first kiss with him like that. I mean we are not even dating. We've bumped into each other a few times and had a good time but now he wants to kiss me? First kisses are supposed to happen in a magical way or at least in a more romantic song.... God! Now I don't know what to do! Thank God Alecto fell then I just ran to drink some water. I'm not sure if I want to kiss him just yet, Remus"

It was a lot for Remus to process. But Remus understood Lily pretty well. She was a romantic through and through. Not like the horny teenagers around. She deserved that magical first kiss.

"I see" he smiled "Do you fancy Luke?"

Lily bit her lower lip "I don't know, I think I do. He is handsome and fit. I saw him without a shirt exercising on P. E. the other day and..."

"Lily!!"

Lily blushed "It was Mary's idea"

Remus laughed.

"Do you think I should just kiss him?"

"No!" Remus exclaimed, then cleared his throat "I mean... No if you don't want to."

Lily twisted her mouth.

"I know our generation is rotten with meaningless drunk snogging at parties" Remus said thinking about Sirius snogging Alecto in her dorm, but decided to shake that thought away "But you are not like that, Lily. You want romance. You want a meaningfull kiss that seems straight out of a novel"

Lily blushed "Yeah I do"

"Maybe get to know Luke a little bit better before snogging him?"

Lily nodded "Right"

"Plus, it is your birthday. You can do whatever you want" Remus shrugged.

Lily let out a little laugh.

"Remus, you are so wise"

Remus felt the excitement of showing her the present now but also the guilt of lying to her. She deserved someone as romantic and detailed as James. Someone who would sweep her off her feet all the time. Especially on her birthday.

"I have a present for you"

Remus had promised though. In the corner of his eye, he saw James taking secret glances at them.

Lily looked surprised "I thought you already gave me that book?"

Remus sighed "This is an extra"

His hand literally shook as he reached the box. He showed it to Lily. She swallowed.

"Happy Birthday, Lily"

Lily grabbed the box between her hands with care. As she opened it, she gasped so loud that several people turned to look.

"Holy Shit!!"

"You don't like it?" Remus asked nervously.

Lily stared at him with disbelieve "Remus! This is beautiful!!"

She was beaming as the chain hanged from her fingers. Her green eyes shone with glow.

But then she shook her head and gave it to Remus.

"I cannot accept it"

"What? Why?"

"Remus, it looks expensive" There it was "How much money did you spend on me? Oh my God!" she covered her mouth "Why would you spend such money on me?"

"I didn't spend much" Remus said quickly "I didn't spend money at all" he added when Lily gave her a concerned look.

"I only spent on the book. This was.... This was... Free..."

Remus's eyes flickered towards James. He wasn't even trying to be subtle. He was pendant on them. He even sent that Danielle girl from before away.

Luckily Lily couldn't see him.

"Just the book was fine" Lily sighed, then she gasped again "What do you mean free??" she put her hands on her hips in a motherly way "Remus Lupin, did you steal this?"

Remus should be offended. But it was obvious by the way he was different from all these posh kids that he had no money. Even Lily who had a scholarship had more money than him.

"What?? No!! I..." He was going to kill James Potter "I didn't..." Quickly Remus think fast... "It was my mother's"

Using his dead mother was low. But nothing else came into his mind.

That surprised Lily even more. She placed the necklace on Remus's hands.

"Remus, I cannot accept this"

She didn't sound angry anymore. Just sad.

"Lily, please accept it" Remus was losing patience.

"If it is from your mum, you shouldn't be giving it to me. It is something special to give to some girlfriend, even your future wife. Your bloody daughter!!"

Remus took a deep breath "It's fine." he cracked a laugh "I don't think I would ever get married" Worse having children.

Lily was still shaking her head.

Remus took a glance at James. He seemed nervous.

"Lily, look..." Remus took his hands on his, the necklace hanging from them.

He looked into the girl's eyes "You are not just my friend... You are a very special person to me. I never got along with girls until I met you. They kind of scared me" he snorted "But then I met you and with you it was easy. I know I've known you for just months but I think we have a special connection. You are amazing and wonderful. I think we are both practically the same. We were meant to know each other and be friends. In every universe. And I really wanted to show you how much you mean to me.... " he swallowed "By giving you this small present"

It was true everything Remus said. It was what crossed his mind when he thought about Lily. Remus kind of sucked at making friends. But with Lily it felt like it had been meant to be. Remus really liked her. He had gotten attached to her in a short time.

"Plus, I am sure my mum would've loved you. And she would have been pleased with you having her necklace"

Lily had tears in her eyes. Remus was a bit overwhelmed as well. He was such a liar.

"I want to give this to you" Remus added "Please accept it"

Lily wrapped her arms around his neck pulling him in for a hug. She was a hugger like James.

"I really like you, Remus" Lily said "You are a very special friend to me"

When they broke apart, Lily had a weird expression on her face. She was looking at Remus with longing and hope. She even bit her lip and played with her hair in the way girls used to do when they flirted. Remus tried to ignore it.

"Want me to put it on for you?"

Lily blinked in reaction "Oh, yeah"

She gave Remus the necklace. He could see a beautiful smile on her face as she turned and raised her hair. Remus smelled her sweet perfume as he put it on.

James was smiling at him. He had his thumps up.

When Remus was done, Lily turned and gave Remus another hug.

"I love it, Remus" she said "I'll never take it off"

James would be pleased.

"Great" Remus pushed her away.

She looked as if she was enchanted. He didn't take her eyes away from Remus.

"I am going to pee" he said.

"Okay"

Lily watched him walk away until her eyes set on her new necklace with a satisfactory smile.

Remus got out of there as soon as he could. He walked towards a smiley James.

"Did you see her face, Moony?" he asked "She loved it!"

"Great! Don't blame me when she falls in love with me instead"

As James laughed, Remus thought about the nightmare that it would be.

"No offense, mate. But you are like her brother"

Remus made a face.

"I can go back and tell her the truth" Remus smiled "She doesn't see you as her brother"

James's smile disappeared.

"Thank you very much, Moony" James said as he kissed his cheek "Next meal at Hogsmeade is on me. You are a golden friend, Remus"

As James walked away, happily, Remus smiled because it had been satisfying to help James out. Although he would have done things differently.

Maybe this could drag the two boys closer. And Remus didn't think there was something more cool than that.

#Remus was the biggest Jily shipper #Sirius wasn't their fan at first because he was jealous #marauders #maraudersera #muggleau #remus lupin #james potter #lily evans #jily #sirius black #wolfstar #Also my headcanon was that Lily thought Remus had a crush on her after this and kind of confused her feelings for him

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