#half shitpost half rant

[eloquentsisyphianturmoil]

It’s just that Fingon’s like that stereotypical son who calls his mum and walks old ladies across the street, mows the lawn for his neighbours, brings home nice, pretty girls who want to be kindergarten teachers or something and is really passionate about some niche compassionate topic like children in poverty’s access to multiple sclerosis treatment and who everyone says is ‘such a nice boy’ but then he goes and dates the eldest kid of Mr. Stay Away From My Boys, Son, a flaming ginger who most people haven’t heard speak. And this is hilarious.

[jhonenvasquezatemyson]

Dib would be an incel but specifically about aliens  

😬

[ankle-breaker-101]

It’s funny how if I showed even the slightest bit less of a smile, my friends would automatically think something was wrong.

It’s not because I’m known for being sad (I’m not), but because I’m just expected to be this walking ray of sunshine with memory problems and a low amount of knowledge.

(Literally, one of my given nicknames is Sped.)

I honestly can’t tell which one is worse.

Not showing happiness 24/7 thus being seen as currently upset (friends)

Or actually being upset and it not being acknowledged (family).

[razypie]

all these ppl dropping lookism because the series apparently lost its "loser guy living in a society of pretty privilege" theme along the way and focused mainly on gang violence.

dude... literally the final boss of this comic is this guy,

--a kpop celeb, the bona fide epitome of what pretty privilege entails.

[i-am-trans-gwender]

I've never met a real person named "Keith". Makes sense because the name is fucking stupid. (I apologize in advance to the three people named Keith who will see this.)

[guplia]

Y'all I just realised that today 50% of 2024 is over! I feel like it just started!

[strawberriesatan]

me looking at Mirajane's canon content

[spikybanana]

who opened the floodgates

and robbed me of all my words

who left me stranded here

drowning in an incoherence

of my own

[zwan99]

Finally completed 2 rows of third phase sinners :3

Now to level the crime brands 🥹

[rattrapdadfigure]

Whoops not me planning out Bumblebee’s kid???

I was just minding my business and thought, what if bumblebee had a kid??

So I used a random number generator to choose a transformer. And then mixed em with bumblebee because it’s fun :))

Anyways, I got Blackout.

So their kid(?) is a chunky, beetle-themed, sports/suv transformer.

I need to change their design more cuz it’s too close to bumblebee for me :/

His head crest should probably be more beetle inspired tbh, since Blackout’s crest is quite complex. And maybe some spiky shapes on his armor for a beetle vibe too hmm

And this’ll be their color palette inspo

[leighsartworks216]

Tries watching anything with my mom. She suddenly decides this is the perfect time to do chores, call up all of her friends/relatives, take a nap, etc etc

[unorthodox-soundwave]

HEY STAFF

IF I’M LOOKING AT THE YOUR TAGS 🔖 SECTION, THAT MEANS I ONLY WANNA SEE POSTS WITH MY TAGS ON THEM

I DO NOT WANT TO SEE A FUCKIN’ CHRIS EVANS X PREGNANT!READER FANFIC

(ALSO LET ME HAVE POLLS DAMNIT)

[ur-num1-idiot]

pov being soo weird abt being clean (“dont touch my hair”, “please pick that up”, “uhmm can you not do that?” “don’t put ur shoes on my bed” and once having my friend help me SCRUB the bathroom, @buckyss-wife) but my room is a disaster bc i psychically can’t bring myself to clean it in this fucking heat, also i’m super weird abt bugs, n dirt- i feel disgusting especially with this fucking weather 😭

[crossedwithblue]

sdkfjk tfw you have major issues with multiple members of your friend group and also on a(n almost) completely unrelated note, you're having a miserable time in the group's dnd game for reasons of Very Probable Undiagnosed Autism Spectrum

[mias-back-from-the-dead]

so this was a line in a fanfic I recently read but it has me fuckign crawling up the walls and watching D&W in a new light

it's part of a larger oh/oh moment paragraph rant wade goes on but the line is:

"I would have happily gone on assuming that this Wolverine is canonically a fuck machine who only sleeps with women ever and that I could hit on him to my dick’s content and never have to worry about the possibility of real rejection"

and that last line COMPLETELY reframed half of wade's actions for me in the movie.

Cuz on the surface level there's the hee-hoo deadpool hits on every single hero joke of it all, which is probably all the writers were thinking about when those lines and directions went onto the script. They needed the throughline of wade being seriously still hung up on vanessa for plot reasons but didn't want to give up all the ridiculous flirt jokes.

From a hollywood writer's perspective, the solution is an easy 'Okay, he flirts with dudes ONLY, no prob, there's a Logan shaped comedic 'straight man' for him to do that at for 90+minutes'

But like. There's Implications to that as a Choice, when you characterize a dude that's so rejection avoidant and purpose-seeking that an avengers' dismissal kills all motivation for putting the suit on at all.

Pointing affections at literally any direction other than people who MIGHT take him seriously. Flirt on his favourite heroes, antiheroes, maybe even a TVA employee or two instead. It isn't that he's not ACTUALLY into Colossus's giant metal ass or Logan's oiled up tits, I'm sure they rev the engines like anything else, but I'm super willing to explore the idea that he's way more comfortable in throwing himself in directions where the rejections aren't 'real' to him. If the writers never thought about that implication, I'm going with concept that Wade doesn't even realize he's doing it at all unless he's in a fanfic universe with a decent oh/oh moment.

It makes me wonder what style of bluescreen he'd go through the second Logan yes-and's in a way that might be interpreted as flirting back. It makes me think of the countless number of dudes he's hit on in the comics despite most of his longer-term relationships being with women. Don't get me wrong, I KNOW the Doylist perspective is likely that most writers go down the straight relationships, gay jokes avenue but it's SO much more interesting to play it watsonian here. it's just a really good fanfic direction to lean down, this fucker is made up of exactly 50/50 emotional anguish about rejection and shitpost dick humour and I just wanna read more works where they feed into each other instead of being tackled separately

HHHHHHh I dUNNO IF I KEEP WRITING IM JUST GONNA GO IN CIRCLES JUST GO READ THE FIC ^

[sylveon-and-velveon]

Oh God can we please see what the slashers would do if you played 'Hopelessly Devoted To You' from Grease? Just in time for Valentines Day 🥺🥺🥺

Happy Valentine's Day everyone! For couples and singles {like me lol}

OMG yes! I loved watching Grease as a kid!! AFTER MAKING THIS: Should say somehow half of these became "love language" responses- I follow you, hol' up

This will include: Michael Myers {OG & RZ}, Brahms Heelshire, Jason Voorhees, Billy Lenz, Freddy Krueger, Stu Macher, Billy Loomis, Thomas Hewitt, Bubba Sawyer, Harry Warden, Tiffany Valentine

Feel free to request any shitpost writing prompt ideas you can think of in my asks, I love silly non-serious ideas XD We besties if you give me Cupcakke remixes-

OG Michael Myers

It's giving lovesick, it's giving obsessed, it's giving "I'm not leaving you"

Well for Michael anyway-

He'd probably take the song a little too seriously, and think you're never gonna ever leave him.

He's never been the best at romance

Blame where he was "raised" for over a decade-

RZ Michael Myers

Just as much in the "never been good with romance" department

But hey, the music isn't loud and obnoxious so he doesn't mind as much to the music you're playing

Especially since it's not as vulgar like.... last time you played music around him

You music player lives to see another day!!

Brahms Heelshire

He sees it as a love language, that you're using music to properly show your love for him without feeling uncomfortable throughout it all

Yep, that's my new headcannon now. His love language is through music. Especially with pianos

He hears you playing that? Oh his heart is MELTING right then there!! He's gonna be giving you cuddles for DAYS after hearing that

Someone make this love language canon please-

Jason Voorhees

Imagine if his mom used to listen to this song?

Bringing him memories. Bittersweet ones probably

Unless you headcannon his mom's still alive, then just sweet

Unless you have a sad headcannon about his mom then you fucked either way mate TvT

But anyway, it brings him memories and he's enjoying the music with you

I kinda went on a Pamela rant there- XD

Billy Lenz

A little confused but he got the spirit

He ain't understanding a lot of it until he hears iconic line from the song

Then he running over to you and is NEVER letting you go

But he still confused

But he trying TvT

Freddy Kreuger

Okay.... here me out:

Yeah the dude will be ridiculous with goofy ass music

But with romantic related songs?

...

So you know how he has one hand that isn't covered with the glove?

And no, you're not getting anymore context to my thought process-

Stu Macher & Billy Loomis

Short and sweet, they'd both love it

Billy's calm about it, while Stu is just like a big doggy. Oh- he is SO happy!!

Billy ain't gonna stop him, it's a good song. And it makes the both of you happy

What's to complain?

Thomas Hewitt

Takes him a few seconds to understand the implications of this song but when he does he's gonna give you a big ass hug

Bone crushing? Probably-

It's Thomas, he'd probably accidently do it-

But he still loves you

Even if he accidently puts you in a wheelchair

Bubba Sawyer

Yeah you gotta explain the song, poor guy highly wouldn't understand the meaning

Or he would... but BARELY-

You gotta explain what the song's about, when he finally does understand he's gonna be so in love with you.

And the song

Like a little confession song... weird choice for a confession song. But you do you-

Harry Warden

A little old fashioned but he understands the song is romantic-esc

He'd vibe to song, bounce his head along to the beat a little

Tap his feet to beat as well, maybe change back and forth between the two

He's never watched the movie before but now the song makes him want to watch the movie

Specifically with you ^^

Tiffany Valentine

She's watched the movie, but she doesn't wanna admit it

But the second, THE SECOND, she hears you playing that song

Ohhhhhhhhhhh you two are singing that song together with no shame

It's her guilty pleasure song, but knowing that you listen to this song now makes her more confident!

Hell yeah!!!