#hannah fucking KNEW

[creppersfunpalooza]

watched black friday over the weekend and initially after finishing it i was like “huh that’s neat” and now i can’t stop thinking about it because

WHAT??

THIS IS A CHRISTMAS MUSICAL WHAT THE FUCK. ITS A CHRISTMAS SPECIAL TO THE HATCHETFIELD TRILOGY. IT HAS CHRISTMAS SONGS EMBEDDED INTO THE MELODIES.

and it’s fucking TRAGIC. what the FUCK. why did i almost cry??

not only that but the plot itself is insane?? what?? like how do you explain that to someone? what the fuck would a synopsis of that look like?

sorry okay no spoilers

just implications

[peach-pot]

done with this gender bs, someone just assign me a gender, you fucking do it I quit.

[nonoqy]

I've been doomscrolling through so many dteam blogs these past few days trying to see how everyone's reactions and can I just say how much i resonate with you and your anons 😭. Especially with "I'm angry at them, I'm mad at them, I'm disappointed that they still haven't learned and they're still stupid fucking men who can't get a fucking hint and ALSO I wish I we can sit down and talk to them more sincerely because we want them to be better and believe they can be and they ARE😭

anonieeee im glad this resonated with you i think a lot of people on twitter are only seeing the bad side of it all and a lot of people on tumblr are quick to dismiss the bad side when actually it's all very nuanced. i wasn't watching cate's stream from the beginning but i feel like a lot of the stuff she mentioned Needed to be heard and i really really hope they both watch the vod

[swordsoprano]

tfw you're facebook friends with the only instructor at your karate school who was nice to you (bc you friended her after she moved to another state and stopped teaching at your karate school, but before you left your karate school) and then you get jumpscared by your primary abuser (your head instructor at said karate school) on one of said nice instructor's facebook posts and find out head instructor is a tr*mp supporter

[vicontheinternet]

Miley Cyrus fans on twitter are getting on my fucking nerves rn

[timeisacephalopod]

That same friend who kept accusing me of writing self inserts (despite the characters only having pretty surface level similarities to me) also rode my ass for AGES about why I'd change my name from my legal name to Winter instead of something that sounds more like my legal name. It was extremely annoying and frustrating to have that conversation like every two weeks until finally I told her I fucking hated my legal name, why the hell would I change my name to something similar to a name I hated??

After that, and only after that she finally left it alone. She also rode my ass about why I use feminine pronouns if I'm nonbinary because shouldn't I be more comfortable with they/them pronouns, which were then shoved onto me despite me saying I'm comfortable with she/her pronouns and I'm realizing this was a fucking garbage friendship. Like I'm not by any stretch claiming to be perfect during all this, but like fucking Christ at least I didn't constantly undermine this friends favorite hobby by claiming they can't write shit but themselves over and over again, insult their name choice, and try and misuse pronouns because she didn't get why I didn't want to switch them (which is no one's damn business by the way don't do this to nonbinary people, it's invasive and fucked up and they don't owe you pronouns that make you more comfortable or that you understand, pronouns people use aren't about you.)

[phansterdam]

HANNAH GADSBY AND DAN LEVY ON SEX EDUCATION AAAAAHHH

[2024skin]

niche joke but I feel like im one of the men in Hannah Gadsby's DMs every time I see a vague post or a not-so-vague post about a blog I don't follow

[brittlebutch]

have been thinking about Until Dawn again -- do we ever like, fully understand what Josh had planned for Matt and Emily? Like, did he steal/hide her bag or something to get them out into the woods? Or was that just some kind of coincidence that played out like he hoped it would?

[deadandwalking]

look i’m just saying, sometimes you trust a group of british people that play scary games with you more than your own mother and that’s ok

[sydmarch]

went on an (unsuccessful) hunt to try & find somewhere to watch broken tulips yesterday & it led me to have this bizarre lost media caleb dream

[yumenosakiacademy]

WAIT WAIT THE "SPOILERS" I THOUGHT I SAW 4 THE UK VS THE W0RLD FINALE WETENT TRUE I JUMPED 2 CONCLUSIONS APPAREBTLY?? WHAT THE FUXK DO U MEAN MARINAS NOT EVEN IN THE TOP 2????? they knew her power... they couldn't let a head bitch lead the charge she's 2 powerful.

[bestfluteninja]

almost fully a THIRD of my spotify listening minutes this year was fall out boy. i had a total of 34,743 minutes, and 10,703 of those were fall out boy. that is 30.8%. of ALL the music i listened to on spotify. for almost eleven months.

[houseofceline]

My Pretty Girl - T.N.

Foreign Touches and Breakfast in Bed

Pairing: Ravenclaw and sort of ditzy but talented Reader x Slytherin notorious playboy Theodore Nott

Warnings: Asshole Theo?

Summary: You wish you never woke up.

Author's Note: Hey guys! It's been a while, sorry for the wait but here it is!

< 6

__________________

“How much did you even drink last night?” Cho cringed holding your hair back as another round of vomit spewed out of you and into the toilet. You could feel your head pounding as you sat on the bathroom floor trying to calm yourself down. Waking up to a hangover and your period may be the worst combination known to man, or really women. Thankfully there were no classes today. 

“Too much,” you breathed in and out, making sure there was nothing else coming up. 

“Come on, we need to go to breakfast, you need to eat something.” Cho tried helping you up as you gripped onto the sink for support. 

You were not ready to go out in public like this. Bed hair, snippets of last night makeup look in the form of smothered mascara on your cheek, and a million knives stabbing your uterus. Definitely not a pretty sight. Plus, you did not want to see any of the boys after last night incase of something embarrassing you might’ve done while out of it. 

“I don’t wanna go,” you groaned as you flopped on your bed and curled up into a fetal position. 

“You have to eat something Y/n,” Cho spoke softly as she ran her fingers through your hair, trying to flatten it. 

“I’ll eat later.” You grumbled closing your eyes, menstruation already tiring you out. 

“I’ll be back,” Cho said as she left the room, but you were too tired to say anything as you slipped away to dreamland.

___________________

A foreign touch on his chest causes Theo to stir awake in confusion. 

What the hell.

He blinked a few times, allowing his vision to clear up.

Seeing the fake blonde from last night he groaned. 

“Why are you still here?” He mumbled, swatting her hand away from him as he scooted further away from her. 

“What do you mean baby? We don’t have classes today silly,” Hannah replied as she sat up, still nude from late night activities. 

“Right, so the last thing I want on a free day is to see your face. Get out.” Theo mumbled hoping she’d leave so he could sleep so more.

“Theo baby, don’t be so mean,” she spoke, reaching out for him again causing Theo to sit up in a huff. 

“You know the deal, you were supposed to be out before I even woke up,” he ignored the nasty feeling of her calling him cringey pet names. 

“Theo we don’t have to be like this.”

“My name is Theodore,” he stated as he got up and got dressed. 

He sighed as he picked up her clothing items off the floor and threw them at her. 

“I’m leaving since you won’t. But I advise you to wake up before Malfoy does, you know he doesn’t like you.” Theo said as he walked out, ignoring the gasps of surprise when her bra landed in her face. 

What an annoying girl. 

He walked to the Great Hall, deciding that he might as well grab breakfast since he was awake. 

“Did you fuckers seriously eat all the sausages?” Theo scoffed as he took a seat in front of Mattheo. 

“What the fuck did you want me to eat? Those nasty ass muffins?” Blaise replied as he passed a goblet of orange juice to him. 

“HEY! They’re not nasty,” Lorenzo spoke up with crumbs falling out of his mouth. 

“Buddy you’re getting it all over me,” Mattheo shoved the boy next to him with a scoff before glancing over at Theo. 

“Fun night huh?” Mattheo raised a glass towards the bruise-like mark on Theo’s neck. 

“Fuck are you serious?” Theo groaned as he rubbed the side of his neck. 

“I knew I’d regret it, she’s been so possessive lately,” Theo rolled his eyes as he continued eating breakfast. 

“Well I mean you’re always going back to her, maybe she thinks something will happen between the two of you,” Mattheo responded while Theo laughed in response. 

“She’s a Hufflepuff, you know only Slytherin girls are worth dating.” 

Mattheo frowned as Lorenzo looked up from his breakfast.

The whole table fell silent as Lorenzo finished chewing his muffin, “Y/n’s a Ravenclaw. I don’t think she lacks anything compared to Slytherin girls.” 

“Yeah in fact I think she looked better than any Slytherin girl last night,” Mattheo mumbled, causing Theo to look up in surprise. 

“She was there?” He gaped, suddenly feeling like he was going to throw up. 

Lorenzo rolled his eyes knowing that Theo had no right to even care if she was there or not. Mattheo and him had begun to care for the girl as if she was their baby sister and at first they were rooting for Theo, but now they weren’t so sure anymore. They had thought that she could be the one to make Theo better. After all it was him who had shown interest first, it was him who had begun to change because of her. She was the first girl Theo had ever described without using compliments that didn’t mean anything. Never spoke about how hot her body was instead ranted to the two boys about how angelic her face looked while she studied and how she smelled like flowers and vanilla. Not only cared about what was on the outside but on the inside as well, bragging to the boys about how talented she was and how cool her nail designs were. That is the same boy who had his eyes set on someone else last night, and the thought of it even made Lorenzo want to either cry or punch him. 

“Yeah but don’t worry, she didn’t need your company,” Lorenzo scoffed as he continued to eat his breakfast again. 

Lorenzo isn’t the type of person to show any resentment or hold any grudges, so Theo definitely knew he might’ve messed up. 

But before Theo could say anything, a familiar face approached up behind Mattheo and Lorenzo. 

Following Theo’s gaze the two boys turned around and greeted the girl. 

“Chang! What’s up?” Lorenzo greeted happily, a complete 180 switch in tone. 

“Hey boys, I’m grabbing breakfast for Y/n since she doesn’t feel well and I thought seeing your faces would cheer her up,” Cho explained as she showed them her plate of chocolate chip muffins. 

Theo furrowed his eyebrows, “Is she okay? Is she sick?” 

Cho rolled her eyes at the boy who caused her best friend to come back to the dorms sobbing her eyes out. She didn’t even know Theo that well but as she watched Y/n clutch her heart as she cried in her arms, she felt as if the boy had broken her heart as well. 

“She's fine as if it’s any of your concern,” Cho brushed Theo’s questions away as she avoided any eye contact with him. 

Lorenzo and Mattheo didn’t bother coming to his defense but instead got up and grabbed some juice and fruit before following Cho. 

Theo looked down at his plate and suddenly didn’t feel very hungry anymore. Blaise sighed before patting his mate’s back in comfort while Theo pushed his food around. 

Maybe he deserved that. 

[pbueckerslover]

YOU WANNA GUESS THE COLOR OF MY UNDERWEAR - CAITLIN CLARK

a/n: not proofread !! i suggest listening to the song while reading billie’s voice makes me go feral 😮‍💨😮‍💨

pairing(s): caitlin clark x female!reader

warnings: language, smut, oral (r!receiving), fingering (r!receiving), strap on use, pure filth honestly

summary: based on this request! 𐙚

don’t have to guess the color of your underwear

already know what you got goin’ on down there

you and caitlin have been dating for a little over a year now. the two of you were currently out at dinner with a couple of her teammates celebrating a big win. she was sitting right next to you and she had been extra clingy with you all night. you weren’t exactly sure why but you weren’t complaining.

it’s that lacy black pair with the little bows

the ones i picked out for you in tokyo

earlier that night when you were getting ready you slipped on a matching set that you knew caitlin loved. the bra was black and lacy while the underwear were also black and lacy but had little black bows on either side.

she picked it out for you when on your guys’ previous trip to japan. the minute she saw it she knew it would be perfect for you. the first time she saw it actually on you she swore she fell in love with you all over again.

whenever you wore it, it absolutely drove her crazy and you knew that. so you put it on with the intention of hoping she would notice sometime throughout the night. and little did you know that’s exactly why she couldn’t keep her hands off of you the whole night.

i saw them when you sat down, they were peekin’ out

i’m gonna tell you right now, they’re all i’m thinkin’ about

at some point during the dinner you noticed her staring down at your back. you could tell that your skirt had slipped down a little and your underwear were starting to peek out.

you saw her shift uncomfortably and gulp slightly. “you ok cait?” you heard kate ask and she just nodded. she was not okay. all that she could think about was those fucking underwear and the fact that she could see the little bows creeping out.

all she wanted to do was grab you and pull you into the nearest bathroom. she sat there trying to keep herself cool. trying to think about literally anything else. but she just couldn’t help herself. she could practically feel herself getting wet at just the thought of you.

you knew exactly what was going on with her, so you decided you wanted to tease her a little bit. you moved your skirt a little so your underwear became even more exposed than before. you turned yourself so only she could see what you were doing.

you moved so close to her that you were basically on her lap at this point. no one else seemed to notice, too caught up in their own conversations to be paying any attention.

she knew exactly what you were doing and she simply couldn’t take it anymore. “hey guys i think me and y/n are gonna head out. i’m not feeling too good.” she told her teammates.

“oh okay. feel better cait.” hannah said smiling at the two of you. you all said your goodbyes before caitlin was practically pulling you out of the restaurant.

once you had may your way out, you started making your way home. she didn’t say a word to you the entire way home. you were confused by her sudden change of behavior but tried not to question it too much.

once you had arrived back to your shared apartment, caitlin was already leaning into you before you even got the door open.

i wanna try it, bite it, lick it, spit it

pull it to the side, and get all up in it

she picked you up and carried you over to the bed, setting you down gently. she climbed on top of you while tugging on your top. “want this off.” she whispered, sending shivers through your whole body.

you did as she said, removing your shirt which revealed the top half of the set she loved so much. she smirked at you before placing kisses to your chest and boobs. you moaned out as she started to move lower, trailing more kisses on your stomach.

she took of your skirt, finally leaving you in the full thing. she was practically drooling at the sight of you. she tugged on your underwear with her teeth causing you to let out another moan. she took one hand to pull them to the side while using the other to rub your clit.

she replaced her fingers with her mouth moving her tongue across your folds. your moans filled the room causing her to smirk at you once again. “fuck! baby feels so fucking good!” you yelled out.

she moved her tongue faster inside your hole while simultaneously using her fingers to rub your clit. you could feel yourself getting closer to your climax. you moved your hands to her hair tugging on it as she continued pleasuring you.

“want you to cum all over my tongue baby.” she said while looking up at you. the look she gave you was just enough to send you over the edge. once again, you did exactly what she said, your release landing all over her tongue.

she stood up and disappeared for a quick second before returning with the strap she had used on you one too many times before. you smiled at the sight of her undressing herself and putting it on.

kiss it, ride it, can i fit it?

she made her way back over to you returning to her spot on the bed. “you were such a naughty girl tonight. teasing me with these god damn underwear.” she snarled. “in front of all my friends…” she grabbed onto them before slowly removing them, revealing your pretty pussy.

she lined her tip up with your entrance, slamming into you with no warning. your moans became louder as she thrusted into you. “gonna have to fuck some sense into you huh?” she growled while grabbing onto your hips attempting to guide herself.

you dug your nails into her back holding onto her as she continued fucking you. “shit it’s too much cait… can’t take it.” you mumbled the pleasure starting to become too much for you to bare.

“nuh uh, i know you can take it baby.” she said fucking herself into you harder. “see just like that. good girl.” she whispered into your ear. you could tell you were close yet again and she could too. that was her sign to thrust into you one last time before you came all over her cock.

she pulled herself out of you and then proceeded to clean the two of you up. she climbed back into bed with you and pulled you closer to her. “god i love you so much.” she whispered before laying her head on your shoulder.

“i love you more cait..” you replied while positioning yourself to be more comfortable.

⇾ make sure to checkout my masterlist if you enjoyed! any type of interaction is appreciated :,)

⇾ thank you sm for reading all the way through!!! i hope you enjoyed it! i loved writing this i’m literally obsessed with this song atm. i’m planning on my next fic to be for morgan so stay tuned!!!! i love you guys 💝💝💝

[zinzinina]

To the anon that didn't know their friend's name—there was a girl I used to work with at my old job where we wore name tags every day and she thought my name was something completely different. Not even close to my actual name. But I was too awkward to correct her so I went by this other name for almost three weeks until another employee corrected her 😅

How the fuck 😭 hahahaha x

anon confessions