#having them get the happy ending they deserve eases some of my pain

[jennifer-jeong]

Fluff + Slight Angst | Zayne x GN!Reader A Cure.

SUMMARY Zayne has trouble sleeping after overtime and you’re the only thing that helps ):

CONTENT Gender neutral reader, established relationship, kisses, hugs, slight angst, mention of previous patient deaths, mentions of guilt, mentions of nightmares + insomnia, mostly fluff, taking care of sleep deprived boyfriend, CHARACTERS ARE 18+

AUTHOR NOTES I finished reading his anecdotes and I’m in shambles. Hubby is traumatized. One of his affinity level up quotes is “you are the only treatment for my nightmares” and I didn’t even know he had nightmares until I read the anecdotes and now I’m just in pain. I will probably also write about the parallel version of him, his dawnbreaker self, because he deserves some love too, his world sounds much more desolate than ours ):

WORD COUNT: 1106

Zayne has always had trouble sleeping or even wanting to entertain the idea of going to sleep. His nightmares have plagued him for so many years now and it’s become his norm. His only relief from it has been you.

Some of the staff that work closely with Zayne have been acquainted with you and they’ve come to understand that if they want the cardiac surgeon to sleep, you’re the key. You love his co-workers because they really do care about each other and you’re so grateful they make sure Zayne rests well. You always make sure to bring them some snacks or coffee when you come to the hospital.

A recent wanderer attack at the outskirts of the city has left the emergency unit overflowing for the past 2 days. You’ve been helping where you can to defeat wanderers and the combat side of things has calmed down. But the hospital is still working overtime. AKA Zayne is working overtime.

He’s been up for 2 days straight due to back to back emergency surgeries that he insists he helps on. The staff will allow him to push himself but they know when to cut him off. They asked if you’d be available today to pop by and you mentioned that you’re already on your way after finishing your last area sweep and clearing the place for wanderers.

When you walk in, you set some coffees onto the clerk’s desk and quickly walk over to Zayne’s office. You slowly knock quietly and open the door cautiously so as not to spook the sleep deprived man. Zayne never shows when he’s nervous, he doesn’t get jittery because he’s literally a surgeon and can’t afford to. But, you can tell when he’s exhausted and anxious, and he is exactly that right now. You walk over to him and he hugs you from where he’s sitting at his desk, swiveling his chair to face you as you stand between his legs. You stroke your hands through his hair and rub his back, letting him enjoy the peace. “All successful?” You ask. He nods with his face buried in your chest. You’re glad that this means his surgeries and patients were all okay, but you know it doesn’t ease the pain and stress of going into a surgery worried that it might not end well. Also, not to mention the immense stress simply performing a surgery brings. The notches on his notebook always come to mind at times like this. It took a while for you to talk to him about it but when he told you they were a tally of how many patients have passed in his care, your heart ached. Since then, he hasn’t kept track and you’re very glad that he confided in you and made the decision to stop. He doesn’t deserve to have that guilt hang over his head when it’s never been his fault.

You continue to soothe him and ask “couldn’t sleep again?” He responds slowly and clearly exhausted “I haven’t felt tired…” he pauses “but you being here is already making me drift into sleep” he says muffled into your chest. “Thank you, I’m happy to see you, I just… I have another surgery soon.” “The staff has already shifted the time slots, you know they don’t let you push that far. It’s been 2 days, love,” you explain to him. Surgeons have already been called in due to the emergency and Zayne has a 12 hour period until his next shift. The staff know he’d get upset if they forced him to not work for more than a day, especially during an emergency. He’s quiet for a minute or two. “I know you trust your team. Take this time to breathe baby,” you say to him gently. When he’s in this state, he can’t form thoughts coherent enough to help calm himself down with logic. So you do it for him, softly, with lots of kisses. You kneel down to meet his eyes and cradle his face in your warm hands. He nuzzles very slightly into your touch and you kiss him on his forehead. He honestly almost falls asleep right then and there. You move him to the couch in his office, he has a wider couch to accommodate naps. He prefers his office to the call rooms (in hospital rooms for staff to sleep in), it just feels cozier and you’re also usually here.

You let him get comfy as you bring over pillows and a blanket for him, all prepared nearby because he quite commonly has to do this. With his eyes closed he mutters a slurred “love you s’much.” He has more words for you but can barely even conceptualize them in his head, let alone speak them out loud. But he knows that you understand the sentiment. He’ll make it up to you when he wakes up.

Somehow you’ve been able to stop his nightmares since you two got close again. He isn’t scared to sleep as long as you’re around. You’re his only safe haven from the dreams and just thinking about that makes him so emotional. He just thinks it makes so much sense that you cure him in this way and he loves you so much, you take such good care of him and he does the same back.

He quickly drifts off into sleep as you sit in front of the couch on the carpet while holding his hand and patting his back slowly. You purposely pat slowly to encourage his heart rate to slow and calm down. You will sometimes leave to do your own thing after he falls asleep but most of the time you stay close, wanting to keep protecting him in his sleep in a way. It probably doesn’t really make a difference but you don’t mind doing your work or playing on your phone nearby. It’s kinda like you think he subconsciously feels you there and so you stay. You don’t pay it much mind but he hasn’t told you that he feels so much better when he wakes up and sees you there. It makes a wave of warmth flow over his cold self and he can’t explain how much he loves it and you.

You watch him a little longer as his breathing slows and you know he’s fast asleep. You go to sit on his chair and check some messages on your phone but you make sure to give him another kiss on his temple before going. You don’t really see it but his lips curve ever so slightly, completely subconsciously enjoying it.

|| MASTERLIST ♡ || Thank you for reading! ||

[weird-is-life]

Don't deny it

Pairing: Rockstar!Sirius Black x fem!reader

Summary: Rockstar!Sirius keeps denying your relationship and you finally have enough

Warnings: angst, fluff, use of pet names, use of y/n, swear words, mentions of head injury, happy ending ofc

Words: 2.4k

You thought, that you've been just imagining it, but as you hear Sirius getting interviewed now, you know, you haven't.

Sirius has been keeping your relationship secret. Like everytime he got interviewed in the last few months, he played it like he was single. No mentions of a girlfriend, meaning no mentions of you.

Like you get it, that the band is really famous and that mentioning your name would kind of make your life a bit more difficult. With less privacy and everything.

But he doesn't have to say your name, he could just admit having a girlfriend. No need to go into details.

And you think, you've finally had enough when you hear him reply to the reporter's question.

"So my last question is for all of the fangirls, is Sirius Black taken?" the reporter chuckles as she asks it.

You hear Sirius laugh too," taken? No, I'm definitely not taken. Still very single, sadly."

You hear him laugh some more, before you turn the interview off. You feel like the dumbest fool.

Obviously, Sirius is too embarrassed of you to even admit he's dating anybody, there can't be any other reason.

And you've definitely had enough of it. Everytime he denies your relationship, you feel like your heart is being ripped out of your chest and stumped on.

You can't go on like this. You don't want to hurt like this anymore. You can't keep hoping that one day, he's going to admit having a girlfriend. You just can't, it pains you too much.

So with that, you decide to ignore Sirius, hoping he'll understand, that you don't want to see him ever again. You know, he shouldn't be home for at least 2 weeks, so hopefully by the time he comes home, you'll move on (too optimistic).

You stop responding to his texts, answering his phone and eventually, you even turn off your phone. You don't give him any explanation, you don't think he deserves one.

Sirius on the other hand is going crazy with worries just after a few hours of radio silence from you. He even calls your best friend to find out if you're okay. Apparently, you are, but you friend refuses to tell him anything more and just hangs up on him.

That doesn't ease his worries at all. He rakes his mind for an answer to what's he done? But nothing comes to his mind.

He tries to contact you again and again, but still, no response. You don't respond even when James or Remus try. So Sirius starts to loose his mind over you.

But he can't leave to go to you, no matter how much he wants to. The band is in the middle of finishing the new album, so he can't just bail on them. He tried it and got yelled by the management pretty badly. Threatening of getting let go by their label if he just leaves.

Sirius becomes completely useless at the studio and the band rehearsals, messing up everything, because his mind is stuck on you.

"Please sweetheart, pick up, please" Sirius whispers brokenly as he once again tries to call you.

You don't pick up and the phone call ends. Sirius throws his phone across the room from the frustration. He slumps onto a sofa and puts his head into his hands in defeat.

He sits there with tears freely running down his cheeks. It's a heartbreaking sight, seeing him so hopeless.

James and Remus find him like that and immediately know, that they have to push him to go see you.

"Go, " James tells him.

"What?" Sirius looks up confused, eyes red.

"Go after her," Remus adds encouragingly.

"But the label....I can't....they'll cut us off-"

"Doesn't matter, we'll just find some other label, there's plenty of them, that want us," James says, maybe a little smugly at the fact, that are are many labels that would kill to have The Marauders.

Sirius looks at them unsurely, "are you guys sure?"

James and Remus groan in frustration, "fucking hell, will you just get out of here, please?" James tells him.

Both Sirius and Remus chuckle, and Sirius quickly gets up. He comes up to the boys and hugs them tightly, squeezing them almost death, until they are pushing him away.

Sirius basically sprints out of the studio. He just grabs all the essentials and runs to the airport. One of the benefits of being famous is the private plane, which he happily uses on his way to you. He gets home in a record time.

The walk through the halls towards your apartment is very nerve-wracking. Sirius doesn't know what to expect, but he certainly doesn't expect all of his stuff, that he's left at your apartment to be sitting outside waiting for him.

"Shit," he curses under his breath and runs a trembling hand through his hair. He can't believe this is happening. He hopes it isn't. He hopes, it's just a nightmare, that he'll soon wake up from. He can't just loose you, he won't survive it, he's sure of that.

Sirius checks under the rug for the spare key and as expected, it isn't there. So Sirius just knocks.

No answer.

He tries again, because he knows you're inside, he can hear the shuffling of things.

"Y/N, please it's me, please open. I-I....can we please talk?" Sirius begs and begs, but you're too stubborn for your own good, you've always been like that, so you don't open.

He knocks and begs, until the neighbours are threatening to call the police on him. Sirius, defeated, sits down with his back to your door.

"Please, love, c-can we just talk?" his tired voice still doesn't break you, but Sirius doesn't give up, " okay, it's okay. I'll wait 'till, you're ready."

And he means it. He makes himself as comfortable as he can on the floor, intending to stay there however long it takes.

You, on the other hand, put on your headphones to ignore Sirius pleads and knocking. You just can't see him right now or anytime soon, your heart is too broken for that.

Even if one part of you wishes to see him and hug him, your body craves the comfort of him. But the rational part of you knows, that'd be too bad for you.

Sirius keeps hiding you and you keep hurting, you can't go on like this, not anymore.

You go to sleep, full of raw emotions, and even if sleep doesn't come easily, eventually you drift off.

In the morning, you wake up just as tired as you were, when you went to bed. And when you open your fridge, you realise, you don't even have anything to eat for breakfast.

You groan internally, you don't feel like going out of your apartment, like at all, but you have to, you can't go on without food.

You put on your most incognito clothes, hoping that you won't meet anyone you know, especially Sirius.

And as you open your door, they suddenly slam wide open, because of some weight pushing against it front the outside.

Said weight, you realise, is Sirius. You yelp in shock, when you see him and look at him bewildered.

Sirius wakes up with a groan. He wasn't thinking of you opening the door, when he first leaned against it. Now he kind of regrets it, as his entire head hurts from hitting it on the floor.

"What the fuck, Sirius?" you whisper yell, you would yell loudly, if it wasn't so early in the morning.

Sirius, upon realising that he can finally see you, stands up quickly. That isn't the best idea though, because his head starts to spin.

"Sweetheart, i-"

"Don't sweetheart me, Sirius. What the hell are you doing here? Have you been here since yesterday?" you question, angrily. You notice, that Sirius looks just as bad as you. Huge eye bags under his eyes, hair dishevelled like crazy.

"Yeah, I told, I'd wait until you were ready to talk," he just replies, giving you a small, hesitant smile.

You don't know, what to say. Your head is full of emotions and you can't decide, which ones are right and which ones aren't.

While you are thinking of what to say to him and glaring at him at the same time, Sirius head starts to spin badly.

"I think, I'm going to pass out," Sirius quickly tells you as he almost tumbles on the ground.

You, without thinking, catch him by the arms.

"W-what's wrong?" you ask a little scared. You find Sirius at your door and suddenly, he's passing out?

"I hit my head..." he mumbles out and hisses as he touches the back of his head.

You sigh, "fuck, okay, c'mon." You help him to your couch and swiftly go to retrieve some ice pack for his head and some water.

You put the ice pack at the back of his head and Sirius winces some more. "Sorry," you whisper.

"It's okay-....I- thank you, sweetheart." Sirius calls you 'sweetheart' again and you want to slap yourself for feeling the butterflies.

You quickly go to the kitchen, so he doesn't see the redness at your cheeks. "Shit," you whisper to yourself, "what am I going to do?"

You've wanted to stay away from Sirius as far away as possible and now he is in your apartment? You don't know if you want to run away, punch him in the face or kiss him stupid.

You stay as long as you can in the kitchen, basically just hiding away from Sirius and you complete forgot about your intention of going to the shop.

Sirius is unusually quiet, so after a longer while you gather all the courage you can to face him, only to find him fast asleep.

You sigh at the sight of his peaceful, asleep face, you quickly throw a blanket over him (before you can think it through) and head out to actually get something to eat, 'cause you're starving.

When you come back, Sirius wakes up at your arrival.

"H-hi, "he says with a groggy, sleepy voice. He smiles at you like nothing has happened, like everything is normal and it makes you suddenly so so angry.

You drop your grocery bags on the ground and quietly, but sternly ask, "you are embarrassed of me, that's why, right?"

Sirius is quickly woken up from his half asleep state by your mad voice and baffles," e-embarrassed? What? Of course, I'm not."

"Yes, you are," you say exasperatedly, you can feel, that your eyes are filling with tears, " you are!"

Sirius stands up slowly, but steadily and comes closer to you, not entirely close, he still wants to give you some space. "I could never be embarrassed of you, y/n, never."

"Then why?" you ask desperately as one tear rolls down your cheek, Sirius's hand itches to wipe it away.

"Why what? I don't understand," Sirius begs for explanation, while he rakes his mind for an answer to his question as well.

"Y-you keep pretending like I don't even exist, like you don't want me!" you try to suppress the little sob, that escapes your mouth. Sirius wants to fucking beat himself up for making you cry, even if he doesn't really know the reason why yet.

"What do you mean?" Sirius asks stupidly and you sob again.

"What? What? What? The fucking interviews Sirius, I mean them," you pretty much yell it to him, the frustration being too much for you.

Sirius finally understands and the realisation hits him like a crushing wave. He didn't know you were feeling this way about them," why didn't you say anything? I thought, you were okay with keeping our relationship private."

"Private yes, but not to the point you are literally chuckling and saying how incredibly single you are," you argue," that's just wrong. But if you want to be single so badly, i won't fight against it."

"No," Sirius blurts out instantly, " I don't want to be single."

"Then what do you want?" you sniffle.

"You. Just only you, nobody else," Sirius is trying to catch your gaze, but you refuse to look at him, "sweetheart, please look at me."

You hesitate, but eventually you look at him. You notice, that tears aren't only on your face.

"Have you been feeling like this for a long time?" Sirius questions and you nod, he curses under his breath.

"I'm so sorry, i didn't notice. Shit, I'm such an idiot, " he starts and without thinking he takes a few steps closer to you," I'm sorry, angel. If I knew, you were feeling this way, I would have never ever continued denying our relationship. Fuck, It was killing me to stay quiet about us, I wanted to tell them everything about you. Please believe me."

You stay quiet and your sobs slowly start to go away. Sirius waits for you to say something, anything really.

"N-not everything please," you whisper. You can't stay mad at your Sirius long, even if you'd really want to sometimes. It's just not possible to be angry with him, especially when he loves you so much.

"What was that?" Sirius doesn't catch it.

"Don't tell them everything about me please," you tell him as you, after a few days, smile. Truly smile.

Sirius takes it as a permission to finally touch you. He has you in his arms in a matter of seconds, squeezing you oh so tightly, while he laughs happily.

"Does this mean, t-that I am forgiven?" he asks you unsurely, as he reluctantly eases you out of his tight embrace.

"Maybe," you grin at him

"Maybe? What do I have to do to get a yes, huh lovely?" Sirius softly asks, he takes your cheeks into his hands and gently wipes the tears away.

"You could kiss me, you know," you say with a sheepish smile. You look too cute, cheeks red and puffy, for Sirius to say no to you. As if he would every deny you a kiss or anything else for that matter.

He instantly leans it and kisses you, it's soft and maybe a little desperate kiss, but it doesn't matter to you or him.

You let him kiss you as long as you manage without breathing, even if you know there're still things to talk about. You'll talk about it, just later, after you get enough kisses.

[bwabys-scenarios]

Hi! Can I request more of chubby!wife with Feitan? Some comfort please and spicey stuff. Thanks you!

Sweethearts

Feitan x Chubby!Reader

warnings: creampie, pussy eating

A/N: this is old so I’m banishing it from my drafts!! it’s a lil rushed, sorry!

taglist: @desiray562 @lovelyxkazuha @ashdownunderscorebeloved

if you would like to be added to the NSFW taglist, comment a ❤️!! make sure you have your AGE in your bio, and that you’re able to be tagged/mentioned!

It had been a tough day for his poor little wife, he could tell by her aura.

Usually when Feitan got home, especially after a long mission, (Name) was jumping up to greet him, the man catching her in his arms and spinning her around while planting a kiss on her forehead.

But that morning when he finally returned after being away for a week, his wife was nowhere in sight. He could sense her, thankfully, but she hadn’t left their room to greet him this time.

“(Name)?” Feitan called out, knocking on the bedroom door.

“Come in sweetheart.”

His heart fluttered at the pet name. They had only been together a year or so, and he was still getting used to how affectionate she was.

Feitan opened the door and peered in, seeing his little wife curled up underneath their comforter, her eyes puffy and red. He was quick to sit next to her, running his hand over her air. “Cry? Why cry?”

Her lip quivered as she looked up at him, and his heart hurt seeing her so upset. Usually, (Name) always had a pep in her step, smiling as her soft hips swayed to music no one else could here.

It’s why he fell in love with her, she was kind and nice to be around, always there for him despite his short comings.

“I… had another bad day at work…”

He scowled behind his jacket. “What this time?”

She looked away, rubbing at her teary eyes. “That woman… m-my coworker keeps saying such mean things to me. I don’t know what I did to get on her bad side but she won’t leave me alone…”

Feitan’s grip tightened on her, causing his little wife to yelp. Upon her little yelp of pain, he eased his grip, kissing her forehead. “She stupid, jealous woman. Can’t stand to see you happy.”

(Name) nodded slowly, the dark haired man moving his hand down between her legs. “Beautiful wife, make you feel better.”

She squeaked when his fingers slipped beneath her panties, rubbing her plump pussy lips before finding her clit. “F-Fei, ahh!”

He shushed her, pulling his wife into his lap to make his actions easier. Even after being married for nearly a year, she was still so shy when it came to intimacy. Feitan didn’t mind though, it was cute to him.

“Wet already, wife needed some attention. Give it to her.”

He purrs against his neck, pulling his fingers from her pussy and shoving them in her mouth. (Name) whimpers against his fingers, lapping up her juices and sucking gently. “Good girl, deserves reward..”

Feitan pushed her onto the bed, prying her thighs apart and slotting himself between them. It had been nearly two months since he got to see his beloved wife under him like this. “Gorgeous…”

He tore her underwear off, lifting up her shirt just enough to see her boobs as he thrusted into her. He loved the way she bounced and jiggled when he pounded into her soft pussy, it made him cum pathetically quick if he didn’t pace himself.

“No listen to work women, listen to husband. I love you, don’t need anyone else.”

“Y-yes Fei!”

He always enjoyed watching her come undone on his cock, and despite having a hard exterior, Feitan was rather soft for his wife. “Cum for me, (Name).”

She came around him, squeezing his cock. He found himself spilling inside of her soon after, collapsing into her soft chest. “Mmph…”

He could really get lost in her soft, plush body. It was what attracted to him so much next to her sweet personality. (Name) panted beneath him, hugging him. “I love you too, Fei… thank you, I feel a lot better now.”

And that’s all he could want, his wife happy and satisfied. At the end of the day, Feitan truly was a good and loving husband, even if no one besides (Name) knew it.

[vibratingskull]

Hello! I really enjoy your writings, the way you write Thrawn in some settings can be so wholesome and sweet and I really love seeing the character in that kind of light. Especially the aroace one and when he’s with the different families you gave him, regardless of how old the kids are or what their dynamic is.

For your requests, do you think you could write Thrawn holding his firstborn child for the first time? I think it’d be interesting and sweet to see him get kinda nervous about the prospect of finally meeting them before his heart fills with so much love upon seeing his baby and being so happy for the finally he now has.

Hope you’re having a wonderful day and that you have fun with all your requests coming in ❤️

art by @blackmonitor

Edit cause i forgot the top message:

Everytime someone ask me about Aroace Thrawn I gain 1+ year in my lifespan! Dad!Thrawn is also so important to me, it is kind off pathetic of me. I'm very glad you like my soft, fluff stories about him, he truly deserves the world and a family that loves him unconditionnaly! Have a great day too my sweet ❤️

Thrawn x F!reader

Tags: Dad!Thrawn, premature baby, skin to skin, father baby connection, soft dad Thrawn

Thrawn caresses your temple with his knuckles, silently looking at you taking a nap. It has been long and torturous but you did it! Against all odds and predictions, you actually did it. It was difficult, dangerous for you and the baby, and they came out premature, but you did it! 

Oh brave you. 

Oh warrior you. 

He feels so grateful for you giving birth to your baby. He held your hand during the entire process, hugging your shoulders as you pushed hard, losing your blood and your sanity in the pain. But you persevered and delivered your newborn despite all the complications due to you two being different species. 

Right now your baby is between the hands of the medics, leaving you two to breathe and trying to relax. You didn't even have time to take your newborn in your arms, the medics immediately took them. 

You both knew the risks of having a hybrid baby, but you both hoped to have at least the time to take a look at them before they got taken away. But their health signals ordered the medics to put them in urgent care immediately. 

So Thrawn spent the last three hours with you, trying to ease your worries and looking over you napping. Your labor was so intense and painful tiredness took precedence over your fear and you ended up sleeping, too exhausted after such a trial. 

He looks at you, full of love and admiration. Since Bridger captured the Chimaera to bring her to Peridea, morphine stocks are rare and sparse. He wished he could have given you some but you refused when the droid proposed it. You refused to have the comfort of painkillers when they could be used to mend the wounds of your troops on the battlefield. He tried to convince you that you had the right, days before labor started but you were adamant! You wanted to set an example as his wife and Commander. 

You chose the way of pain to give life to the most perfect being in the Universe, the love of his life, the light of his days. And for that his gratitude is infinite. 

“Grand Admiral?” The careful voice of his head doctor raises in his back, snatching him off his contemplation of your sleeping form, “We just finished. Do you wish to see them?” 

Thrawns contemplates them up and down in silence before leaning forward, gently kissing your forehead. He pulls the cover over you and straightens his back before turning towards his medic. 

“Lead the way.” He placidly responds. 

After three long hours of uncertainty, the doctor appears a bit unsure but nothing in their demeanor indicates any high-stress level, Thrawn concludes that whatever medical procedures your baby needed, they have been able to deliver. 

As they silently walk Thrawn’s mind starts asking…weird questions. 

Was it painful for the baby ? 

Did they feel scared ? 

Did they cry for their mother, powerless as they were manipulated by strangers ? 

Did they feel cold at any moment ? 

Did they try to reach for any of you two with their little hands only to meet the void ? 

“Here we are, Grand Admiral.” 

Thrawn stops before the door… terrified. What if… the medics failed ? He doesn't read any bodily signs typical of tension in them but is he himself in the right mindset to read them after such a hard birth and pregnancy ?  

“How are they ?” He demands, imperial, never letting any doubts or fear slip through in his demeanor as he knows so well. 

He internally prays to have read them correctly. The head medic looks at him, their lips in a thin line, searching for their words. 

“Authorization to speak freely ?” 

Thrawn nods, his expression closed off and unreadable. 

“It wasn't pretty. To be frank, your baby is a miracle survivor, we are not equipped properly for babies’ care and health monitoring, but I also notified you of the risks of giving birth to a hybrid.” 

Thrawn ever so slightly squints, a subtle threat and call to order. The doctor decides to cut the story short. 

“You are incredibly lucky Grand Admiral, truly. I don't know if we would be able to repeat this feat for a second baby, especially stranded on this wretched planet.” the doc extends his hand towards the open room  “They are sleeping.” 

Thrawn considers the open door and wonders for a second if he has the strength to walk into the room before getting a grip. 

Of course, none of his turmoil is visible, and his hesitation lasts less than a second. He walks into the little room, a former waiting area reconverted into a nursery. 

It’s not perfect, no battleships ever saw a nursery before. They had to do with what they had to accommodate new life on Peridea. He advances towards the bassinet, perceiving the heat signals through the material. 

He, oh so slowly, approaches the little form lying under a blanket. He feels like his heart is going to explode under the pressure.  

They are blue ! 

Just like him. 

But they have your hair color and your nose The cheekbones and forehead bumps are unmistakably his.  

He leans forward to observe better. 

He never witnessed such… perfection before. This is simply the most beautiful being to ever exist in the cosmos. The perfect mix of their father and mother. 

His heart bleeds at the nodes of the different monitors over their body and the tubes through their little nose, but it must be down to unsure their survival. 

“They are stable now, but they will need to remain for some time.” The medic explains, coming behind their Grand Admiral. 

Thrawn tilts his head, his eyes never leaving the baby, looking at them moving in their sleep, eyes closed shut. Inadvertently, he feels his hands clasped behind his back starting to tremble. He isn’t even touching them but he fears to hurt them in any way. 

They are just so small. 

And him so big... 

What if he causes pain to his baby by trying to hold them? What if he hurt them more than they are already wounded? He could never forgive himself. Maybe it is better if he abstains from any physical contact. 

Yes. 

That is for the best. 

“What gender are they?” He asks without lifting his gaze from this absolute perfection. 

“It is a brave little girl.” The medic explains, a small voice audible in their voice, “My congratulations, Grand Admiral.” 

His heart skips a beat. 

A little girl? 

Just as he so dear hoped. He always desired a daughter. You were neutral on the question but he knew deep down that he was meant to father a little girl. 

And there she is! 

His little warrior... 

“A daughter...” He repeats like he has difficulties realizing his chance. 

The baby seems to react and agitate herself in the incubator. 

“She recognizes your voice. You should try and hold her, she needs comfort after this... trial.” The medic explains. 

Thrawn smiles, his expression hidden from the doctor. She recognizes his voice... 

The voice of her father. 

He spent so much time talking to your bump during those seven months of pregnancy, in hopes the baby would be able to recognize him and associate him with safety and comfort. 

His heart clenches knowing he succeeded. 

He tentatively enters the incubator with his large hand and very delicately caresses his daughter’s cheek with his knuckle. 

She is so warm. 

Like a Chiss. 

She seems to yawn and tries to seize his large finger in her tiny fist, desperately longing for some warmth too. His hands travel to her tummy and gently brush it. 

Warrior... She is so small compared to him, that he feels he could crush her in his fist. That thought distraught him so terribly that he stops his caress, much to his daughter’s dismay who lets out a whine escape her. 

“Take her in your arms. The first hours are important for a baby’s general well-being.” 

“Leave us alone, please.” Thrawn orders nonchalantly, hiding his worries from view. 

Once the medic leaves, he carries a chair closer to the crib and gets rid of his white jacket and black tank shirt to very tenderly seize his daughter. He takes care of holding her fragile head correctly and supporting her body, not pulling off the nodes of the monitors, and sits down on the chair, pressing his baby girl against his warm Chiss skin, in a soothing skin-to-skin contact. 

Maker she is so light and fragile... He suddenly feels so terribly clumsy with such a precious package in his hands. 

She babbles in her sleep, agitating herself in his hands. She holds her tight to not risk dropping her, pressing her soft precious body against his beating heart.  

It feels good. 

It feels right. 

He instantly feels a new connection forming between himself and his baby. She seems to try and get a grip on him, to hold him close, to keep the warmth source against her sensitive baby skin. 

“Hello, little one.” He speaks softly with his deep melodious voice. 

A sound that seems to please her immensely because she seems to try to smile despite all her tubes. He delicately cradles her. 

“You scared us immensely, you know? But here you are, at last... My baby.” 

Thrawn isn’t a man prone to sentimentalism, but in the intimacy of the hug, he can’t help himself. He needs to whisper sweet nothing to his baby, deepening the connection further. 

“You are already so loved, little one. We dreamed for your arrival for years. Ch’eo k’eten, ch’eo euhn ch'etecerci.”  

The baby presses her cheek against his peck, letting herself sooth by her father’s heartbeat. She appears so appeased right now, sleeping soundly in his arms. At her true place. 

“My pride, my jewel...” 

He gently lifts her higher for her little head to rest in the crook of his neck, inhaling her scent. It is pleasant and relaxing, almost familiar like a song he had known for years. 

He sighs. 

Soon his shift will resume. And he will have to leave you both behind in the med bay to ensure the Chimaera’s safety. 

But for now, he will indulge as much as he can. He also hopes to be present for your first meeting with her, he longs to see your elated expression when he will bring your your firstborn. 

“Welcome to the world, little Thashao. I vow to protect you from any harm, my sweet, my treasure...” 

@bluechiss @thrawnalani @justanothersadperson93 @al-astakbar@thrawnspetgoose @readinglistfics @elise2174 @debonaire-princess @twilekchiss @pencil-urchin @ineedazeezee @mssbridgerton @dance-like-russia-isnt-watching @Cortisolcosplay @obbicrystaleo @germie2037

[chimcess]

Waterlog || pjm (6) (Teaser)

Pairing: Jimin x Reader Other tags: Olympic Swimmer!Jimin, Ex Olympic Swimmer! Reader, Swim Coach!Reader Genre: Strangers to Friends to Lovers!AU, Coach!AU, Swimming!AU, HEAVY Angst, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, fluff, eventual smut, I'm so soft for these two it's crazy. Word Count: TBD Release Date: Sept 13, 2024 at 5pm (MT) Synopsis: After a car accident ends her athletic career, Y/N has slowly started rebuilding her life again as a high school swim coach. That’s until she gets a request from an old friend and finds herself back in the spotlight as the new coach of Olympic swimmer, Park Jimin. Warnings: ANGST, crying, mental health issues, talking about mental health, I'm so soft for them it's actually wild, angst, trauma, panic attacks, kissing, SMUT (more to come in the official release), ableism, mention of past alcohol abuse, talk of previous sexual encounters, talks of bullying, probably poor swimming terminology, I also have no idea how swim events work so might be wrong about that too, talks of possible inappropriate coach-athlete relationship, lots of insecurities, survivor's guilt, lots of guilt and shame actually, reader needs to be kinder to herself, we all deserve a Jimin, he's still best boyfriend, more to come later...

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“Ready?”

I jumped. Beside me, Jimin laughed. 

“Yeah, yeah,” I joked. “Laugh it up. Just take your clothes off and get in the water.”

Jimin stuck his tongue out at me, peeling his jacket off and tossing it on his gear bag. His flip flops were next and in no time he was in the water. I stood at the edge and watched as he started doing his laps. This was more about stretching his body than training, and I told him he needed to get better at practicing taking this slow.

The pool began to fill in with the others as they practiced their designated moves. Jimin and the boys were tagging each other in and out to get used to taking turns diving in. I watched with pride. His breaststrokes looked amazing. His progress was something to behold and I was honored I had been trusted with him. Relationship aside, he was such a hard working person and it was a pleasure to work with him.

“He looks good,” Coach Tyler Moore told me, his eyes locked on Jimin’s form. “Better than when he was with that other guy. Kid’s an animal.”

“Good for a short guy,” Nicole, one of the other coaches, joked.

Jimin’s height was always a topic of discussion for him. His length had him at a disadvantage compared to other swimmers and it was a mystery how he was able to compete competitively at all. Olympic level swimmers were at least six-foot in the men’s category. Most of the women were taller than Park, too. Myself included.

“He’s a great swimmer,” I replied. “He’s fast and strong. Could probably bench press a bear if he tried.”

Tyler laughed. “Do you think he’ll place at the Olympics?”

I nodded, “Of course I do. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”

“Girl’s a recluse,” A familiar dry voice drawled beside me.

I chuckled. I had known Summer Lewis since we were in high school. We were good friends back in the day before she moved out to Michigan after getting married. I wasn’t expecting to see her here, but it was a welcome surprise that eased some of my nerves. 

“Thought hell would freeze over before she was back in public,” Summer continued. “Do you even leave the house?”

“Yes,” I couldn’t keep the smile off my face. “Obviously. I’m here right now.”

“How are you feeling?” She asked when the others broke off from the group to talk to a group of reporters. “Leg holding up?”

“Yeah. I still get a bit of pain sometimes and when it’s cold it hurts more, but I’m alright. Alive, so I can't complain too much.”

The same couldn’t be said for Namjoon, I thought. I cast that out of my mind. There was no room for survivor’s guilt right now. I was happy. Everything was working out. He would be happy for me. But he’s dead.

I took a deep breath. I was too stressed out about today. The reporters were inching closer and closer and the thought of interacting with them made me feel physically ill. My stomach churned uncomfortably and I pushed down the rising panic. It was so stupid.

Nothing had even happened and here I was sweating like a pig.

“Do you miss it?” Summer asked, jutting her chin out toward the pool.

“All the time,” I told her. A bead of sweat trickled down my neck. “Hey, I’m going to go use the bathroom real quick. Let Park know if he starts looking for me.”

Summer nodded, “We’ll be starting in ten.”

“I’ll be back before then.”

Jimin was already looking my way when I spared him another look. He lifted up his hand and raised his thumb. I nodded at his unasked question, not wanting to worry him. This was my thing that I needed to handle. He just needed to focus on the water and being with his team.

Squeezing my hand into a fist, I tucked my thumb underneath my index finger and popped it through the other side. Waving my wrist, I signed to him that I needed to use the restroom. He nodded and I could tell he relaxed a bit. Good. I just needed a few minutes to collect myself.

I splashed water on my face. Back in the same bathroom we were in this morning. I splashed myself again before I let my mind wander. Today was too much. My anxiety was at an all-time high and the make up on my face felt like spackle. I knew it looked nice, it was the same as it was every time I did it, but it only served to make me even more insecure. I looked like I was trying too hard, and everyone knew that. God, I was such an idiot.

And then the whole thing with Jimin.

I let a single tear slip. That was so inappropriate and disrespectful. He was so nervous and scared, and I just took him at face value. He told me something so deeply personal, and I just glossed over it because of what? I hadn’t gotten any in a while? I was no better than the men I despised.

I allowed myself two minutes to cry. All of the guilt and shame I felt poured out of me, but once my watch went off, I was dabbing my face off with tissues and fixing my makeup. Whatever was going on with me would have to wait. My boy was counting on me.

Opening the bathroom door, I slammed into a chest. I stumbled a few feet back barely catching myself on the wall. The person I bumped into was stood still.

“I’m so sorry,” I gushed, adjusting my clothes. “Are you okay?”

“Perfectly fine.”

I recognized that voice anywhere.

Taglist: @ownthesunshine @screamertannie @lovelytaes-blog @pernesianparapio @tae-with-some-suga @sumzysworld @chimmisbae

© chimcess, 2024. Do not copy or repost without permission.

[tkaulitzlvr]

WE NEEEED A PART 2 OF ANSWER IT !!! 🙏🙏 you don’t have to if you don’t want to but i just NEED to know what happens after ! anyways i love your writings!

ANSWER IT (2) - T. KAULITZ

synopsis: after things with your boyfriend end unexpectedly - thanks to no one but you, tom makes a confession that you never could have been prepared for.

content: angst & fluff

a/n: so many ppl have been BEGGING for a pt2 to answer it and honestly i never planned on writing one but here u go i guess!!😭 also random but this clip makes me go feral so had to use it for the gif🙏

my chest rises up and down, completely breathless as tom collapses on top of me, lips lazily pressing to my collarbone. our bodies stick together, sweat glistening against them, the smell of sex circling around the room as our heavy breathing mixes with it. he pulls out of me, a low whine leaving my lips at the loss of contact. his calloused hands run up and down my waist, unspoken words left unsaid as we lay within each other’s embrace, coming down from some of the best sex we have ever had.

“so fucking good.” he mutters against me as his head rests in my neck, a lazy smile on his face.

but, unlike every other time we had fucked, i no longer share the same sense of hazy happiness, lethargic bliss that i usually would, the reality of the situation soon coming to light, a sickly feeling of guilt rising from the pit of my stomach as i realise what i have done - my boyfriend has just caught me cheating on him.

though i completely deserved this, to feel so ashamed, so completely devastated, after all, i was the one to blame, it didn’t at all ease my pain. strangely, i didn’t regret fucking tom the way i had been these past months, i just longed to erase the phone call, wishing that it had never happened as i stare blankly at the ceiling, my eyes welling up with long-awaited tears whilst tom absentmindedly lays with his body on mine, lips placing tired kisses on my bare skin.

“so fucking glad you finally got rid of that guy.” he mutters, gently nibbling at the skin below my ear, pulling at my waist and moving his crotch to grind it against me, his small movements making me realise exactly what he wants. “he was such an ass, didn’t deserve to have you all to his self, didn’t treat you the way you should’ve been, such a fucking cunt.”

my whole body tenses up at the mention of him, eyes no longer able to hold the tears back as they fall down my cheeks. i am frozen in place, unable to move, beating myself up for literally everything, hating how tom can be so nonchalant about it - he had always been aware that i wanted this to be strictly kept a secret. and i cannot help but blame him. he was the one to pick up the phone, to make me answer it, and ultimately blow my cover.

my body begins to shake as i silently sob, tom’s head lifting up from my shoulder in confusion. his eyebrows furrow, clearly not understanding why i am upset, totally oblivious to this whole thing, not able to see where he fucked up.

“woah woah, what’s going on?” he asks, sitting up and resting his back against the head board, quickly scooping me into his lap as he holds me, hands running down to my lower back in an attempt to comfort me.

my sadness soon mixes with anger, utterly despising tom in this moment as i roughly escape his hold, pushing my arms flush against his chest, finally getting out from his grasp. i clench my jaw, shaking my head as the tears continue to fall, angrily slipping my panties and bra on.

“hey, what’s up? talk to me, what happened?” tom frantically asks, getting up from the bed and slipping his boxers on, rushing over to me and trying to place his hands in mine.

“what happened? what fucking happened?” i scoff, shaking my head at his stupidity, in complete disbelief of how someone can be so naive.

his eyes search mine, genuinely not understanding where any of this has come from. he nears me once again, but i take a step back, not wanting to be anywhere near him right now, taking his silence as an opportunity to carry on with my fit of rage.

“what happened is you made my boyfriend break up with me, and you don’t even care!” my voice is raised, just below a shout as his eyebrows furrow, expression now mirroring my rage, as he opens his mouth, ready to lash out on me as i had on him.

“i made him break up with you? are you fucking insane?” he lets out a frustrated laugh, tongue playing with his lip ring as he steps back.

“you answered the phone! i don’t know what shit you were trying to fucking pull, but this is your fault, don’t make me out to be the crazy one!” i shoot back, digging a finger into his chest as i point at him, done with his attempts to manipulate this entire situation.

“you’ve been cheating on him for the past three months! since when do you give a fuck about his feelings or your relationship? it couldn’t have been that fucking great if you felt the need to fuck me on the daily!” each word that falls from his lips pierce me in the chest, completely taken aback at his nerve. the second that my face falls, mouth opening with no sound coming from it, he knows that he has gone too far.

“wow.” i scoff, searching the room for the rest of my clothes. “that’s fucking low.”

“is it? ‘cause the last time i checked, you don’t fuck someone else whilst you’re in a relationship unless it’s gone to shit. stop acting like i’ve ruined something that actually mattered to you, like you had a perfect relationship. it takes two people to fuck, you’re no fucking saint.” he keeps going, knowing that he is getting to me, aware of the right buttons to press - and he is hitting every single one, scoffing when he sees my face fall, tears falling at a much faster pace.

i struggle to find the right words, stuck in place as i know that he is right. though he said it in the harshest way possible, i am no better than him, if anything, i am worse, tom not in a relationship like i was. and it is that realisation that kills me slowly, twisting the blade inside me as i stand silently, tears now cascading down my cheeks.

“thanks. if you were looking to make me feel worse than i already do then you’ve done a pretty good fucking job.” my voice is low as i refuse to meet his eyes, completely ashamed. i slip my hoodie over my frame, redressing myself as i begin to feel uncomfortable in such little clothing in front of him, the confidence that would usually surround me long gone.

his face softens once i walk towards the door, panic setting in as he rushes to stand in front of it, blocking my exit.

“fuck- i didn’t mean it like that. don’t go.” he pleads, his eyes sorry as they look into mine, searching for any hint that his subtle begging is working.

“why should i stay? so you can ridicule me even more? tell me how much of a slut i am? that i should feel guilty, and it’s all my fault?” i scoff, listing off the endless scenarios.

“why would i do that?” he asks, his voice now softer, the anger that previously dominated it long gone as he seems somewhat sorry for me.

i stay silent, partly intrigued to hear him continue, however also knowing that my tears are preventing me from producing coherent speech. he takes a step towards me, hand lightly brushing against mine as he takes a deep breath, opening his mouth to speak.

“wanna know why i hated him so much?” he asks.

the question had always lingered in the back of my mind. i knew, from the way tom’s face twisted in disgust the first time i told him i had a boyfriend, that he despised him, his hatred only growing each time i would mention him. he never said why, instead using his name to fuel his own desire, never failing to remind me that he could never fuck me that way tom would, always slipping his name into the conversation as some reminder that what i had with tom was far better than anything i had going on with my boyfriend.

i look upwards, my eyes meeting his, my gaze a silent nod of agreement to his question.

“i couldn’t stand the thought of him touching you, being around you, knowing that you belonged to him and not me. drove me fucking insane. i loved that i got to see a side of you he never did, i loved seeing you underneath me, because i knew that that was the only time you belonged to me.”

my eyebrows furrow, trying to understand what he is saying, confused on how it has taken this long for him to say all of this.

“i like you. since that night when we hooked up at the club, i couldn’t stop thinking about you. i tried, but somehow everything came back to you. and it killed me knowing that all i could do was fuck you, knowing that you’d never feel the same way, because of him. and i hated him for it, i still do, because all i could think about is you being in love with someone else, wishing just for one second you’d care about me the way you do him.”

he pours his heart out, lips staying parted once he finishes, trying to make out my thoughts from my facial expression. i give him nothing, only able to stand there in pure shock, not ever anticipating anything like this, especially from someone like tom. i knew his reputation, and i knew that i wasn’t the only girl he was fucking, but it had never mattered for me. it was wrong for me to be doing this with him in the first place - catching feelings would be on a whole new wavelength of immoral.

“say something, please.” he mutters, his voice desperate as my silence only lets his words linger, the atmosphere turning from tense to uneasy.

it may be rash, and admittedly, my mind is hazy from the entire situation, yet in this moment, i don’t care, and it is this impulse that brings me to press my lips against his, arms wrapping around his neck as i pull him closer. he quickly kisses back, hands running to my lower back as he smiles into it, something about his lips against mine igniting a spark that i had never felt before, and though it was wrong, it felt so right - it always had.

against all odds, against everything that was deemed morally correct, i need him, and though it took his unexpected confession for me to realise it, i am more sure than ever, holding onto him tighter and tighter as he does the same, pulling away and smiling against me.

“i hate how crazy you make me.” he mutters against my lips, his cold breath fanning against them. “but i don’t want it to stop.”

those are the final words he says before reconnecting our lips, carrying the unspoken promise that he means every part of it, the missing piece within me now found, finally realising that what i needed had been right in front of me the whole time.

requests are open! keep sending them in!!

[bungoustraypups]

i don't talk enough about my headcanons involving fukumori specifically while mori's pregnant* during the bungou stray pups universe timeline events, and that needs to change tbh.

so, take some mostly transposed from twitter with some tumblr originals mixed in:

imagine heavily pregnant mori stealing fukuzawas clothes because it's both easier and less stressful than buying tailored clothes of his own. he mostly does this to avoid reminding himself most commercial pregnancy clothing is labeled as "maternity wear, but also because fukuzawa tells him how precious/hot he looks wearing his clothes while heavily pregnant anyway so it's a double win

fukuzawa cuddled up to mori during the last days of his pregnancy making sure he's as comfortable as he can be as mori sleeps more than he's ever slept before because he can be safe knowing that fukuzawa's there for him

when mori's in the second and third trimesters and the poor guy's just. aching constantly (he should get an award for carrying his husband's bigass kids because they didn't get their size from mori), so fukuzawa's often rubbing his back/feet for him

fukuzawa feels bad about the physical strain on mori too and knows he can't really do anything to stop him from aching since it's kinda part of the process so he does what he can to ease it while also saying variations of "sorry for doing this to you" while mori grumbles halfheartedly at him

despite all the pouting and whining he does, mori never really blames anything on fukuzawa, because he knows as well as anyone that this is just how it goes, and also knows that fukuzawa could be treating him so much worse, because he's been treated worse in the past (see my completed, multi-chapter, minor angst with an impossibly fluffy and sweet happy ending, fukumori babyfic "dog days are over" for more details on uh, all of that)

speaking of that tho, mori getting emotional over how sweet fukuzawa is to him is >>>>. not even because mori thinks he doesn't deserve it (he does, but that eases with time, more and more as time goes on, and more easily than anyone expects it to), but just because he's already so emotional with more hormones running wild inside of him than he knows what to do with or has had to deal with since he started testosterone honestly, and unable to hold back those emotions like he usually would instinctually (even though fukuzawa's been trying to coax him into being more open ever since the relationship started but he also knows these things take time)

you know the ADA & PM threw them a surprise baby shower (to mori, at least, fukuzawa knew about it in order to keep mori from knowing about it, and kept him distracted while they were setting it up) too, and mori wept tears of joy when they came home from a "spontaneous day out" to it. he naturally immediately threatened everyone there with a fate worse than death if they told anyone about his reaction, and even though they knew he was absolutely not being serious at all, they don't mention it outside of the attendants lmao

also, fukuzawa holding mori as close as he can, as often and as much as he can, whether they're laying down in bed/on the couch/etc or not, touching him and holding his face and his hands etc, so gently and tenderly, not because he thinks he's "fragile" or anything, but because he loves him so much, mori and their baby both, and they're both so used to only being violent or touch being accompanied with pain or violence that every time they touch and hold each other tenderly is a reminder of how far their lives have come, and a reminder to mori that, this time, their child will grow up with two fathers who love and care about them and want to keep them safe and hold them close and gentle because they love them, and this time mori doesn't have to do it alone, he doesn't have to be the only one trying to save his child (and ultimately, the only one who suffered when he lost her)

fukuzawa resting his head on mori's belly and tracing circles on it with his thumb, cooing softly to their baby while mori knits them a lil stuffed animal to give after they're born (it's a wolf pup) along with a baby blanket

mori being very, very pregnant, but still trying to do things on his own, and hissing at fukuzawa like an angry cat when he tries to help, only to realize he can't properly do the thing and reluctantly letting fukuzawa help as he pouts off to the side lmao

and of course, mori feeling frustrated at "being useless" while pregnant, and fukuzawa saying "you're literally growing a person, inside of your body, with your body's limited resources, all while still also doing things, right now. i don't think that's quite right, my love"

tbh i will never not be weak for fukuzawa being totally enamored with mori growing a little person, their little person, in him because how can i not be. it's precious and also he would be

and of course, head always full of thoughts of. fukuzawa cuddling with mori while he's pregnant and always keeping his hands on mori's belly. mori loves being held by fukuzawa because he feels safe and also loved and also thinks it's absolutely precious how protective fukuzawa gets too. they also are both so very enamored with and in awe of the physical representation of their love, the proof that their baby is healthy and growing and they'll get to meet them soon. they're so in love with their precious little thing long before they arrive and they've never been happier about anything in their lives before

*note: i headcanon mori as a trans man, for those who are new to my blog/posts on here. pls don't tag this as like, omegaverse or au or anything, bc it's Not, it's just canon divergence. heavy canon divergence lmao but canon divergence nonetheless bc this is very much still with the intent of being in the general bsd universe

[nameless-ghoul-trash]

Papa emeritus IV X Ghoul!Mom!F!Reader

Part 2

-

Word count: 2.1k

Lightly proofread

Warnings: none.

Part 1 / Part 3

-

You were standing outside the ghouls den waiting for Copia to show up. After you left Copia's office, you had finished your chores. Having finished with an hour to spare and you went back to your room to find it empty. It left you feeling rather empty yourself. You spent a good portion of that time thinking over the who scenario before heading for the to head to the den, bringing you to the present. Watching Copia turn the corner. He had fixed his paints, looking nothing of how he did at your last meeting. You call out a greeting. "Hello, Copia. Are you ready?" Smiling he replied. "Yes, fiore! I have had some time to think over everything." Moving over to the door he knocked, he waited a second and then pushed the door open. He seemed to be in a rush. Probably wanting to get this over with. Following behind Copia, you smile. In the middle of the common room was a ghoul pile, and in the middle lay Aether. Happy purrs and chatters could be heard coming from the pile.

Rain was the first to pop his head up. "Hi Papa, Ma." He greats you both and continues. "What are you guys doing?" One by one, you see the rest look towards the two of you. "It had come to my attention that I needed to come talk to all of you as a group. Solo noi come una famiglia." In the process of talking, Copia his way to sit on the floor in front of the ghoul pile. He turns and gestures for you to join him.

Taking a seat the ghouls before you untangle themselves from each other. Once everybody is sitting up, Copia began. "I know today did not go as we expected. Some painful information was dropped on us all." He talked to them as if he were a father talking to his children. Voice gentle, understanding, and caring. "This is something we will need to work through together." There was a pause."Why is this happening?" Mountain was the first to speak out. His voice was unsteady. "It is my fault. I have not been performing my duties as Papa as well as I should be. I am not matching up with the expectation. This is the punishment that was deemed necessary. I tried to get Sister Imperator to reconsider with nothing to show for it." He was being completely honest. Guilt written all over his face. He was not hiding any information from the band.

"That's bullshit!" Sodo's angry voice cuts through the air, causing Copiato stiffen. "You work harder than most! How do you not meet the expectations. Almost all of our past rituals have been successes. You do the workload of at least three people. What do they actually expect from you! Sure, you're a ditz sometimes, but come on." Sodo looked exasperated. "He's right. You don't deserve this. We don't deserve this." Cumulus commented. "I agree." Rain and Curris added in unison. "What are we going to do? They are taking away a vital part of our group. Swapping an experienced guitarist for someone new!" Swiss voiced his thoughts, which was followed by Mountains. "There is also no guarantee that the new one will end up being any good either." You just sat there listening to what everyone had to say. "I hear your concerns. I have similar concerns as well. We will need to do our best to accommodate to the changes. It will be a learning process for us all." Copia does his best to ease their concerns.

You become painful aware of the guilt and sadness that had spread across Aether's face. His voice broke your heart when he chose to speak. You had to resist the urge to crawl over and hold him. "What of me?" It came out broken, almost scared of the answer. All eyes were on him the moment the words left his mouth. "What will happen to me?" He voiced a little clearer. Copia's face softened even more. "Do not worry, Aether. You will remain here. You may be pulled from the band, but you are not any less one of us. I will die before I let anyone rip you from your home. " There was a spark of a feeling you couldn't quite pin point with the was his voice dropped to almost that of a threatening tone. A wave of relief rushed over Aether. The others also seemed pleased with that answer. "I don't know if this arrangement is going to be temporary or permanent. I'm not going to promise either to you all. I need you to know that I am always on your side, and I will always do my best for you guys." Copia continued. "Papa informed me that the new ghoul will be summoned next Friday. They will be fresh and in need of a guide. Aether, would you be comfortable taking that role?" You asked.

Watching a small smile creep up to his face, he accepted. "I think I can do that." Copia take over again. "Thank you. They will move into one of the open rooms. We give them two or three day to adjust once they arrive. After their training will begin. I would like you all to welcome them with open minds and kindness. They did not choose this, and they are not to blame." Everyone responded in some way, weather it be vocalized or a gesture. Patting Copia's shoulder, you proceed to stand, letting them finish the conversion without you. Watching you walk through the door, Copia let out a sigh.

Looking back at his ghouls, he becomes aware of them all staring at him with either a stupid grin or an expectant look on their faces. "What?" Copia questions. "We totally see what's happening." Aurora giggled out. "See what?" He stares back, confusion clearly written across his painted face. "That look." She pushes again. His brows furrowed deeper. "Did I mess up my paint?" He brings a hand up to his face, but not quite touching. This causes a couple of them to chuckle at his obviousness. "No, Papa. Your paints are fine." Cirrus reassures. "Then what is it?" His confusion turning to frustration. "(Y/N), Papa. We know you've got a thing for her." Swiss interjected.

Feeling the heat of embarrassment creep up his neck and warm his face, he looked to the side. "I do not know what you're talking about." He denied. "We noticed a while ago. You don't hide it very well." Cumulus commented, giggling at the man. "Don't feel bad about it." She added, trying to confort him. Facing them, he let another sigh fall from his lips. "Is it really that obvious?" Sodo barked a laughing. "Painfully so. I wouldn't be surprised if most of the ministry knew."

"You ever going to make a move?" Aether pried. Copia ran a hand through his hair. The thought of approaching you about his attraction to you had crossed his mind countless times. He ran into the same problem every time. "I don't know how." The confession stund the group. "What do you mean you don't know how? Get her flowers. Invite her to dinner. I've never seen her with anyone, so at least you've got a shot." Sodo throws at him. Copia made an exasperated gesture. "Satanas! I know that! But I don't know her favorite flower, nor what her favorite food is, not even her favorite color. Non so niente di lei! Even after all my years of knowing her, I do not truly know her." He tries to voice low. The room quiets.

Realization hits each of them like a ton of bricks. None of them knew much, if anything, about you. They knew you worked hard and hardly complained. You had always lended a helping hand to anyone in need. You listened, gave advice, never judged, and always took care of everyone. That's when the guilt crept in. You were all these thing for them, yet they hadn't taken the time to learn about you. Satan, they had been in your room and hadn't even noticed any consistent colors that would indicate a favor. All except one.

The room remained in a thick silence until Rain broke it. "I guess none of - " Sodo interrupts him. "She always smells of lemon grass and sage. Never strongly but enough that when she holds me, I can smell it. So she probably spends some time on that side of the garden. She also has a pressed (Favorite Flower) framed beside her bed. I know she has not been with anyone at least in the last year or so because I would smell it on her. I'm around her enough that I would notice. She rarely smells of anyone but us long enough for it to be noticeable. That'll at least give you a start." Sodos voice was soft as he played with his fingers, seemingly embarrassed. Everyone just looked at him shocked. His grumpy attitude returning he looked around. "What? Surprised I actually pay attention?" He bit out. Copia smiles. "That is actually very helpful. Thank you." He was sincere in his appreciation for the fire ghoul.

------

In the kitchen, you settled at the sink to do the task at hand. Almost finished, you hear the door and then the thuding of footsteps. Coming to stand beside you, Copia looks at you. "You did amazing in there. See, you didn't need me, and they have your back." You smile at him. He just takes you in for a minute. From the base of your horns, the curve of your lips exposing the sharp points of your fangs to the beautiful (E/C) of your eyes. A warm feel makes its home in his chest. "Sí, il mio fiore, you were correct." Continuing your work, you ask."Do you feel better now?" "Yes very much so." "Good! It's going to be a bumpy road, just know that you have people who have your back." You beemed at him.

Copia paused for a minute. Now was as good a time as ever. Willing his nerves not to show, he tried to discreetly let out a breath. "Um, (Y/N), I have a question." Not stopping your work, you giggled. "Shoot." "Would you be apposed to have having dinner with me." The question surprised you, halting your actions, you look at him. He was visible nervous. Suddenly, a wave of your own dread and fear crash over you. "Like a date?" You question back. "Not if you don't want it to be. It could be just dinner as friends. You don't have to do anything that you're not comfortable with." He was rambled on. The tension was clear as day, both panicking for different reasons. You steeled yourself, trying to rein in your emotions. Dinner was just that, dinner. As much as you were afraid, you were also lonely.

You were tired of the loneliness if you were honest with yourself. You had spent many years being careful of what you let happen in your life, that in the end you neglected yourself all the same. Having lost your closest friend over five years ago, you never really opened up to anyone after that. The closest you had come was the time you had spent with a certain ghoul.

It was just dinner. You were not laying yourself bare to him or spilling you secrets. It was eating a nice meal with a good man. You could not deny your attraction to the human. More than once, she had caught her eyes wondering over to him when in the same room.

Giving him a smile, you make eye contact. "I would like that." His words died on his tongue. It is him who looked surprised now. "Wait, really?" Drying your hands, you turn your body to face him. "Yeah! I think that it would be nice." "Oh well! Good, good." A slight awkward air fell between the two. He honestly had not expected to get this far. "Umm, how about Saturday? Does that work for you?" You lay your hand on his shoulder. "Yes, Copia. That works for me." Copia looks to the sink and back to you. "Would you want any help finishing?" He asks. "If you would like to, you can dry as I finish washing." Taking off his gloves, he grabs the towel, and they finish the dishes together.

------

No one can convince me that Sodo would not cling to someone he veiws as a motherly figure. I will die on that hill. I hope you enjoyed part 2. As always, feedback and requests are always appreciated and encouraged.

Tag list:

@water-ghoulette

@thirstyroses-world

Here's another photo from the ritual!

[satureja13]

As promised, Jack took Ji Ho to the Temple to meet Arturo. And even though Kiyoshi left the tree, there must still be a connection between them. The orbs in the tree are still there and glow brightly...

First they meditated and eased Jack's pain. It seems Arturo added even more bird deco to the temple ^^' He's so happy that the man that became a tree and came back is united with his beloved 'Bird' again...

Jack felt so much better after Arturo eased his pain so he started to do the chores around the temple to help Arturo and pay back for his help. He can't remember how often he said 'Don't eat this!' to the goats today... (Kiyoshi's Little Goat and Kumo are here too. They seemed to have missed the tree. They also spend decades with him.)

Ji Ho went to talk to Arturo about Vlad. He told him their whole story. Arturo: "You went through a lot." Ji Ho: "Yes. I know it's only him for me and it's only me for him. We can feel us through the bond. We know anything from each other. We don't even have to talk. And I know how much he loves me. Why can't I love him? I was able to love Luci. Luci was basically him - and I still can't. And even though we were so close and even woohooed and kissed a few times it's still so awkward between us."

Jack and the goats had finished their chores and joined them.

Arturo: "It seems you skipped a few steps, huh?" Ji Ho: "Skipped?" Arturo: "Or should I say you started from the wrong end? Usually you start a relationship with some carefree time together, go on dates, chat and laugh together, get to know each other - and then youfall in love. But you were first afraid of him, then he died, then you were afraid a curse could hit you... You had to do things only lovers do and had the weight of the world upon your shoulders. These are no conditions for love to grow." Jack: "Gods, you are right! They will do all of this and Ji Ho will fall in love! And I will help them!"

'Here comes the rain again. Raining in my head like a tragedy. Tearing me apart like a new emotion. I want to breathe in the open wind - I want to kiss like lovers do Want to dive into your ocean. Is it raining with you?

So, baby, talk to me - like lovers do Walk with me - like lovers do'

Eurythmics - Here comes the rain again

On their way back, Jack showed Ji Ho a bit around. They also went to the little beach where Vlad and Jack were before. Ji Ho: "It's just so amazing here. I can't believe we will live here. It's just like paradise. How do we deserve this?" Jack: "I think we really do deserve it after all we went through, don't you think?" Ji Ho: "Haha oh my - right you are!"

They swam around a bit and admired the stunning scenery. Ji Ho: "These wooden stilt houses are just so beautiful. They would be perfect for a weekend trip to the beach." Jack:"That would be awesome! I wonder if we can buy a lot here to build one. Let's ask Arturo next time."

They lay on the beach for a while. The warmth is relieving Jack's pain. Ji Ho: "I wonder what Vlad will say about us dating, chatting and laughing ö.ö" Jack: "Hahaha - he will hate it. But don't worry. I'm there."

Ji Ho: "But Arturo is right. We only had hardships together..." Jack: "I'm sure it gets easier for you when you get to know him. How he really is. You can find no better man."

From the Beginning  ~  Underwater Love ~  Latest 🛺 'Home happy Home' from the beginning ▶️ here 📚 Previous Chapters: 🛺 'Home crappy Home' from the beginning ▶️ here 🌴 'The Expedition' from the beginning ▶️ here 🎤 'Putting the Boys Back together' from the beginning ▶️ here 🥀 'Disbandment of the Group' from the beginning ▶️ here

[catgirlforeskin]

can you please stfu about forcemasc? 

i'm transfem and it has been a kink of mine FOR SEVERAL YEARS (mostly inside my head as fantasies because i was too afraid to verbalize it and share it with anybody [and with the way other transfems like you demonize it, i see why i kept these fantasies to myself for so long :/], and the recent boom in its popularity does make me happy, even if it comes from transmascs and not my own demographic. 

forcefem does nothing for me because i have been naturally feminine from a young age and openly displayed that femininity. unlike many other transfems, i never repressed my femininity and i refused to conform to standards of cishetero male masculinity. so the "force" part just turns me off, because there's no erotic appeal to forcing femininity on myself as a "release" for me. because i have been openly feminine since i could talk. 

however, from a young age, i did end up brewing a bitter resentment towards masculinity and men, mostly as a result of how boys and men treated me for refusing to be masculine and being feminine as an amab. 

i was already non-masculine by default, but their abuse and scorn as a reaction to that only made me despise masculinity and all things male even more. 

even though i don't believe misandry is real, i began calling myself "misandrist" and adopted radfem-lite beliefs (unsupervised internet access as a kid is a blessing and a curse at the same time). 

i began hating boys and men so much, which soon caused me a great deal of pain, because when puberty arrived, i discovered i was sexually and romantically attracted to them. 

this contradiction of being attracted to boys/men, but also hating them because i believed they were inherently cruel violent mean and evil caused me SO MUCH PAIN as a teenager, on top of the dysphoria i was already struggling with (luckily i had a pretty weak puberty but i was still dysphoric about my height). i felt like a hypocrite and a pathetic coward for falling in love with the same people who tormented me since i was a kid, because i thought all boys/men were violent and evil by default, because i thought that was what it meant to be a boy/man.  

what does this have to do with forcemasc?  

forcemasc is a fantasy for me. it's therapeutic for me. it makes me feel more comfortable in my skin. 

it's a "release" for me in the sense that enables me to let go of these unhealthy, hateful beliefs i've held since i was a child (which only end up hurting me), and also feel at peace and more accepting of my attraction to men, as well as discover new sides to who i am. 

the idea of trusting a partner enough and us being intimate enough for me to allow him to make me explore a more masculine side of myself when i am with him is a very powerful fantasy to me. not only do i feel at ease with his natural masculinity, but also with myself uncovering different aspects of my being which are masculine. and both of us are being masculine together in that moment and deepening our relationship that way, even though he is a man and i am still a trans woman. i trust him enough to display a more masculine side of myself around him. 

because imo, most people, regardless of gender, have both feminine and masculine traits. and even if i am 99% feminine and was completely avoidant of masculinity my entire life, the "forcemasc" kink is all about connecting with that 1% and deepening my bond with my male partner in the process.

you're a transbian so you don't understand it, but guess what? some of us are straight. some of us like men. i really hope that isn't what upsets you so much.

transfem experiences are not monolithic. even if i'm the only transfem in the world who likes forcemasc (which i highly doubt, but whatever), i deserve a space for my fantasies.

please don't rain on my parade.

I think “forcemasc” is a psyop to get more people to play Overwatch or something what even is this why are people suddenly yelling at me about it. I don’t care if people wanna have sex with cargo shorts on and fuck through the zipper.

That being said, straight sex is an unforgivable sin and any caught practicing it should be tied to the backs of horses and dragged through gravel

[demondwellersword]

holding on to our little moment, i’ll never forget it as long as i live.

vash the stampede x gn!reader

warnings: angst, takes place before the end of trigun stampede but may contain mild spoilers

notes: (the title is actually lyrics from stay with me (mayonaka no door) by miki matsubara. i thought it was a good fit for the fic.) i’m out to hurt my feelings with this one tonight y’all

Home was not a place to Vash the Stampede, it was a person.

You.

No matter where he ran you were always right there beside him, and it was a fact he allowed himself to take solace in. But fear was an ever present nip at Vash’s heels—fear that he would run somewhere you couldn’t follow, fear that Nai would take you away from him too. So Vash made a compromise: you could stay, but you could never know. Because as long as you never knew that Vash loved you, no one could hurt you, right?

But you saw it differently. You saw it as Vash pushing you away every time you got too close, always keeping you at arm’s length. You guessed you were only ever meant to be a companion, something a little better at conversation than a dog. The pain of it stabbed at you if you thought about it too long; the exact same way that it did tonight.

You had set up your tent but couldn’t sleep, the pallet beside you as empty as ever. You’d been tossing and turning to no avail, always just as awake as you had been five minutes ago. You sighed and pulled on your jacket, shivering against the cold breeze that rolled through the tent when you opened the flap.

You could see Vash sitting on one of the small dunes nearby, staring off into the distance. You chewed at your lip. A question burned in the back of your mind, leaving behind footprints in the sand as it led you to where Vash sat. You eased yourself into the sand, dusting it off your hands as you settled into place.

“Do you even want me with you anymore?” You blurted out, watching Vash startle and scramble to refute your question.

“What? Of course not! Why would you ever think something like that, (Name)?”

“Every time I try to get to know you beyond the most basic information you always blow me off with some half assed answer.” You huff out a breath, pulling your knees up toward your chest. “You always introduce me to people as your friend, but I barely know you, Vash.”

Vash turned his gaze away from you, looking down at the hands that rested on his knees through the space between them. “You’re right. And I’m sorry for that. But…it’s for your own good.”

Tears pricked at your eyes. “For my own good?! Vash, we’ve been traveling together for over a year now! I’ve been shot at, stabbed, damn near blown up, and you think I can’t handle knowing something as simple as your last name?”

“Don’t have one.”

You were too mad for this to give you true pause, but it did cause a quizzical look to pass over your face. “I’d rather know you don’t want me around than to stay here and pretend like you do! You seem like you’d be much happier without me here, so just go ahead and tell me to leave!”

Vash kept on looking out into the distance, his turquoise eyes slowly shutting as he softly uttered, “I don’t deserve to be happy. And I shouldn’t be keeping you from being happy either.”

You felt as if you’d been gutted. All you could do was stare at Vash, swallowing back tears with all your might. “You….you can’t mean that.”

“It’s true. Because of me you’re going to have to leave too. I just…don’t want it to be because you got killed. I couldn’t live knowing I could’ve stopped it.”

“Vash…”

Vash finally turned to look at you, his tears glittering like stars in the pale blue moonlight. “I can’t lose you, (Name). I…I love you.”

You couldn’t hold your tears back any longer. You sobbed into the silent night, the full impact of Vash’s words hitting you at once. You didn’t know what Vash was really running from, and you doubted you ever would, but you knew now more than ever that you were going to keep on running with him. As long as it took, as fast as your legs could carry you. You’d be there. And when the time came to finally face it, you’d be there too. You had to be. Because you loved Vash too, and no force on any planet could change that.

“I’ve been so scared of how things would end, I never really let them start,” Vash admitted, “but I can’t keep running forever. Not from this, at least.”

You reached over and took Vash’s hand in yours.

“I’m real sorry I put you through all of this. You didn’t deserve it.”

“Thank you, Vash.”

“Do you still want to keep going with me? I understand if you don’t.”

You shifted closer to Vash and rested your head on his shoulder, enveloping yourself in the scent of gunpowder and metal that always lingered on him. “I never want to leave you, Vash. Not if I can help it, at least.”

Vash leaned his head against yours, a soft smile stretching across his face. Maybe it was okay, letting you in. Maybe it would all blow up in his face someday, but he hoped you’d still make it out with him to the other side. He vowed then and there that he would always protect you, and that you would be the one thing Knives couldn’t take away.

“I was hoping you’d say that.”

[stardustprompts]

the devil in me  -   the dark pictures anthology  sentence starters change tenses/pronouns as needed !!  some lines have been edited for clarity / length / ease of roleplaying   tw ;  death ,  language 

‘I will never be weary of you.’ 

‘that’s my (name), always finding that silver lining.’ 

‘how’s the marriage going?’

‘I’m starting to think I’ve gone and married a thrill seeker.’ 

‘see what happens when you chase a thrill?’ 

‘this feels like some sort of treacherous plot.’ 

‘I know that word. it’s french for something illicit.’

‘you know, this tub is awfully big. I think there might be room for another body.’

‘I really thought you’d have a little more fight in you.’

‘don’t fight it. it will only hurt more if you do.’ 

‘it’s really tough when just being honest means everyone thinks you’re a bitch.’ 

‘I’m sick of being on my own.’ 

‘it’s a fucking mess, to be honest with you.’

‘I was born with the devil in me.’ 

‘I’m waiting to hear what the catch is, no offense.’

‘it was 100% your fault. because you fly by the seat of your ass.’

‘just trust me.’ 

‘jesus, you try to give someone a compliment... ‘

‘how are you not in jail?’

‘you watch too many horror movies.’ 

‘bitch, I’m always camera ready.’ 

‘stop trying to make me like you.’ 

‘try not to fall and die.’ 

‘this reminds me of shit summer camps.’ 

‘you’re afraid of heights?’

‘oh shit! we’re all gonna die!’

‘don’t look down.’ 

‘you always knew how to get me through the shit, didn’t you?’ 

‘you are such a dick.’

‘oh my god! I think I peed a little!’ 

‘this place does give me the willies.’ 

‘scream if you need me for anything.’

‘I’ve blocked that from memory and do not want it coming back.’

‘you talk in your sleep. not sure I ever told you that.’ 

‘you’re cute when you’re worked up.’ 

‘you trying to scare me now? revenge? cause, good job...’

‘if my cheeks are red it’s from this wine, not because I’m bashful.’

‘I’m just fucking with you I’ve wanted to kiss you for months. I just was scared to make a real move.’ 

‘you have to let this go. we’re fine, (name).’

‘in the work that we do -  the very important work -  the truth is the star.’ 

‘next round’s on me, promise.’ 

‘I’m supposed to buy ‘nothing’ is eating away at you?’

‘what about taking a huge risk and just doing something?’

‘flimsy. I don’t buy it.’

‘you trying to butter me up?’

‘why are you letting them all think I broke up with you?’ 

‘ugh, I can’t decide if that’s sweet or selfish. or both.’ 

‘you can’t just roll up and drive - by psychoanalyze me.’ 

‘you have to accept the reality that this did not, and will not, work.’ 

‘maybe we should just add this topic to our ‘discussion no - fly’ list’.

‘remember our talk about boundaries?’ 

‘that scared the fuck out of me.’

‘you know he meets anger with more anger.’ 

‘that... sounded very sincere.’

‘I deserve better than this. so do you.’ 

‘I heard enough, thank you. I know what betrayal sounds like.’ 

‘great. happy? you have a future, and I don’t.’

‘am I the only one whose getting really freaked out by this place?’

‘as much as it pains me from the depths of my soul to say it, I’m starting to side with (name) on this one.’ 

‘not that I want to agree with you like ... ever ... but that’s what I’ve been saying.’ 

‘don’t come crying to me if you end up dead.’ 

‘I can’t decide who the judas is. I have so many options.’

‘you’re going to find out very soon that you won’t get very far without being a team player, (name).’ 

‘you don’t always have to get a word in, (name).’ 

‘of course you’re enjoying this.’

‘what do we do? we’re like... alone here.’ 

‘this is my don’t be scared song. sing it and I won’t be scared long.’

‘choices, (name). make better choices. this is your own damn fault.’

‘it’s a two person job to pull (name) away from her mirror.’

‘hey, help! somebody help me, I can’t see a thing!’

‘try to relax, slow deep breaths. in and out.’ 

‘you’re okay now. you’re safe.’ 

‘I’m not fucking tired!’

‘kills me to admit it, but (name) is right.’ 

‘we don’t know that’s what actually happened.’

‘this is when you suddenly choose to take a stand?’ 

‘we’re not safe here.’

‘I think maybe you’re confused about what you saw in the dark.’ 

‘I know what I saw.’

‘we’ve already got a plan, it’s leaving.’ 

‘would it kill you to think positively for a change.’

‘your delusions make for such great plans.’ 

‘just stay put so I know where to find you.’

‘I’m leaving, (name). you coming or not?’ 

‘sorry, just... still freaked out.’

‘you really don’t care about anything else, do you?’

‘i’m freaking the fuck out.’ 

‘shit! gimme your hand.’

‘we’re trapped. jesus, we’re trapped!’

‘maybe you’re right. but you don’t have to be an asshole about it.’ 

‘maybe that was a shitty thing to say, I’m sorry.’

‘ no, no, no. don’t put  ANY of this on me. this is all you.’ 

‘I guess I didn’t even think of that.’

‘guess I was holding out hope things would change for us. deep down, I’m still hoping.’

‘it was my fault.’

‘no it’s not fucking okay! it can’t be! I have to live with this every day.’ 

‘you have to get the fuck out anyway you can! just get the fuck out!’

‘there’s a lot of miles between eccentric and murderous.’ 

‘oh good, you hear a creepy kid voice too? I was worried I was finally snapping.’ 

‘I was worried I was finally snapping.’ 

‘are you losing your shit? ‘cuz I don’t need that right now.’

‘stop being such a damn wimp.’ 

‘are you okay? please say you’re alright!’

‘he wants us to chose, doesn’t he?!’

‘I don’t want to die! please help me!’

(name) is playing a game, and it’s no fucking joke!’

‘I’m suggesting we use our heads.’

‘we can make guesses all day, but if we die here it won’t matter.’ 

‘I’m not playing detective. I just want to survive.’

‘maybe isn’t good enough.’ 

‘no one is going to believe any of this without proof.’

‘crazy implies out of control. this is methodical.’ 

‘we’re not the first, are we?’

‘if something goes wrong one of us will be dead.’

‘you don’t have to do this.’

‘if it looks like it’s going south, get the hell out of there.’ 

‘please come back.’

‘if I see (name), he’ll wish I hadn’t.’

‘tell me you’ll be careful. tell me I’ll see you again.’

‘good, because I think I love you.’ 

‘well, now I have to come back.’ 

‘tell everyone I chose this. and if you get the chance to fuck him up, do it.’ 

‘how could you just leave her like that?!’

‘when I was a kid, I didn’t speak much.’ 

‘good thing you didn’t become a killer.’

‘suck it up, princess.’

‘I don’t suppose there’s any good news.’

‘if we go off - book we’re just going to make things worse. let’s stick to the plan.’

‘can you not freak me out any more than I already am?’

‘I was too scared to stop and look. I’m sorry.’

‘(name) you are out of your mind.’ 

‘I am not a murderer.’

‘do you hear what you’re saying? that is insane.’ 

‘you’re in shock and you’re not thinking straight.’ 

‘you’re in shock. all of us are. don’t beat yourself up.’ 

‘please tell me you can hear me.’ 

‘(name), I thought I lost you.’

‘no talking! I said hands where I can see them!’ 

‘after all this, starting over sounds like a good idea.’ 

‘so, probably not the right time to ask this but ...  like ... are we a thing?’ 

‘dude, trauma - bonding is legit hot. fuck yes, we’re a thing.’ 

‘how could I forget? you bring it up every chance you get.’ 

‘what did you win?’ 

‘this is gonna be so much fun!’

[inuhiime]

:: 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒 ! ──── ⪩⪨ 𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐎 𝐍𝐎𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 ; 𝐩𝐭. 𝐢𝐢𝐢

' please save my soul. '

' i know you're suffering now. perhaps nothing i will say will ease your pain. '

' even for a dead person, you look miserable. '

' what, am i not worthy enough now? '

' i want to hear some last words that aren't about pain or regret. i've heard too much already. '

' first, i see reality, then fear, and at last... i see you. '

' what if we fail? '

' saving the day, then sacrificing yourself. you've glorified yourself with death... are you happy? '

' you don't look well. what happened? '

' you can't fall here. get up, poor thing. '

' at least they don't hate me, fear me, or want to hurt me. that's already more than i can ask for. '

' there is no freedom here, no companions, and it's not the ocean you long for. '

' don't worry, i'll help you. '

' tell me, what honor do these people have? '

' i know you won't believe anything i say at this point. '

' i am not in the mood for lecturing anyone. '

' when that time comes, i shall willingly be at your mercy and follow you to the ends of the earth. '

' what, you believe that story, too? '

' i want to thank you for saving me just now. '

' you must know that the fact that you're still here means we haven't lost. '

' i don't have many people around me who i can trust. '

' i hope that you can be honest with us. '

' how do we prove our honor? '

' what's happened has happened. no need to apologize. '

' do you still have the courage to trudge on? '

' despair is a silent monster. '

' in this world, only the blooming vitality can satiate the hungry soul. '

' what are you worried about? '

' are we truly honorable? '

' it must be hard for you to understand, right? that there'd be a selfish, cruel and cold-blooded monster like me in this world. '

' in fear, chaos always ensues. '

' you parasites don't deserve to be here. '

' i'm all too familiar with the ugly faces humans make when they're jealous. '

' don't get me wrong, i had no intention of being the good guy. '

' i knew it. i knew this would be a trap. '

' you've given them hope and joy. that is an incomparably honorable thing. '

' you're not hurt, are you? '

' do you want the redemption of death or to continue living a painful life, shouldering the heavy weight alone? '

' you don't believe me? '

' i am happy. of course i'm happy. '

' i'm sorry, i can't help you. '

' earning money is already so tiring, why can't i indulge and enjoy life a bit? '

' i've already apologized, what else do you want from me? '

' don't believe everything you see. '

' this is the worst decision you've made. '

' what would you do without me... poor thing. '

' once you let your guard down, you will be swallowed mercilessly. you can only go against the current. '

' so there are monsters far scarier than me in this world. '

' hold on a bit longer, i will get you out of this. '

' i know it's just a means of escape... but what's wrong with escaping forever? reality is just too cruel. '

' at times like these, we need to stick together and help each other to overcome the difficulties, right? '

' no matter what, i must keep going forward. '

' you made it this far? haven't given up yet? '

' i've been wanting to eliminate you this whole time. '

' i know you want to win. but now, how exactly will you achieve that? '

' you're just a monster i put a mask on! '

' don't you ever wonder... are you worthy of respect? '

' you still have a chance of redemption. '

' who do you think you are? why on earth should i confess to you? '

' everything has been settled. time to go home. '

' it seems our fates have become intertwined a long time ago. '

' if you keep hiding the truth, i can't help you. '

' i swear, i really didn't mean to, i just wanted to live... '

' maybe i'm just destined to be a monster who brings disaster to those around me. '

' i didn't mean any harm. i just wanted to help you. '

' don't worry. i'll be by your side. '

' i know you may not be able to accept the cruel reality of the world all at once. '

' now that you're living the high life, isn't it time to atone for your sins? '

' god must be blind to grant you so much success. '

' ready to tell the truth this time? '

' you've already seen my true colors. no need for me to keep acting, right? '

' human nature is inherently ignorant, wicked and vile. '

' who are you to judge my point of view? '

' i went to hell and back, but you haven't! '

' welcome to the place where most dreams come true. '

' i'm very glad to see how happy you are now. '

' how could fate have spared us so easily? '

' if i let you choose, will you choose to return to reality and live in pain, or for me to wipe your memory and let you keep living in that happy illusion? '

' how can i keep on living without a shred of hope? '

' don't you understand? your life is over! '

' why are you being so cautious? i don't bite. '

' you're not owned by anyone. you're free now. '

' i promise i'll try my best to help you. '

' let me bear the brunt. you must escape. '

' i don't want to be a coward hiding behind you anymore. '

' why are you acting like it has nothing to do with you? '

' there's no reason for them to be afraid of me. '

' are you angry with me? '

' answer my question. what exactly did you do to them? '

' you should be happy. your enemy is already dead. '

' please don't hurt people without waiting for an explanation. '

' enough talk. don't you have your work to do? '

' is there something you're looking for? '

' you don't see many people like me anymore, who will repay evil with kindness. '

' ...alright, i'll forgive you for now. '

' all of us will hunt you down and kill you. how much time do you think you have left? '

' death is ubiquitous indeed. you can't hide from it. '

' there are too many things i can't let go of. '

' i hope you can escape your destined misery... what do you think? '

[thetempleofthemasaigoddess]

The words only we can speak

Adar x reader

This takes place in an AU where Adar went back to his family after escaping from Morgoth; I will still call him Adar, even though I know it doesn’t make any sense.

*****

Imagine being scorned by everyone in your village because you were born deaf and mute; because of this, you have always been a pretty introverted person, more at ease with books and animals than with other Elves.

Your parents fear that because of your disability, you will never have a suitor, marry and form a family; indeed, no one in the village has ever shown any romantic interest in you, which is (mostly) fine by you, but not by them. They speak with various acquaintances and in the end propose an engagement to Adar, an Elf from a nearby village who is in a similar situation as you: he has been captured by Morgoth and has escaped years later, alive but not unharmed. Fearing no potential bride will want him, and hoping that having someone by his side will help him find some sort of serenity, his family is, just like yours, trying to find him a wife.

You are both embarassed and humiliated by the whole situation, and accept to be introduced only because your families begged and forced you. When in the end you meet, your heart fills with pity as you look at the scars on his face and the other signs of the torture he must have endured for so long; this poor Elf has been lucky to escape with his life and will probably have nightmares for the rest of his days, and his parents care about him getting married?

You have brought parchment and quill to be able to talk to him. You decide to humour your families at least for a few days, since you both find the whole situation absurd and are determined not to marry unless it is for the right reasons, and you have a walk together; Adar is taciturn by nature and it takes you a while to express the simplest concept, but the silence between you is not embarassing… like you have instinctively found another way to communicate.

Surprisingly, a friendship develops between the two of you. In time, Adar shares with you the horrors he lived through, the certainty he would die at the hands of his captors and the hate he still feels for himself every day he looks at the battleground that his body has become. While aware that you have been much luckier than him, since you never had to fear for your life and can still communicate with others, even if it takes a while, while Adar can’t help looking the way he is, you tell him how frustrating it is to live without hearing or speaking, being cut off from every conversation, never being able to bond with anyone, and being considered dumb just because your body doesn’t work the way most Elves’s do.

“Most people ignore me, like I am a rock on the sidewalk or a chair in the corner; they do not understand that I have thoughts and emotions like anyone else, even if I cannot express them.” you explain, frustrated and saddened “I always thought I might marry, one day, but I never found anyone willing to really… know me, understand me, since it takes more time than with most maidens”.

Adar nods, having read your message; when meeting you and your family his long dark hair was loose, to hide as much of his face as he could, but now it is tied on his back, which is due to his being comfortable in your company as much as to the warmth of the day. “I know your feelings. I feel fortunate at being alive, but it saddens me to see how people react when they see me. I have lost friendships, and many Elves have proved crueler than I thought possible, as if they think that I do not deserve respect and kindness, or that I cannot feel anguish and pain, simply because my skin is… the way it is.”

In the end, you agree you shouldn’t care about what other people think and do, and that you are both happy to have met each other.

A while later it is your village’s yearly celebrations; your parents have invited Adar and his family, even if they didn’t tell you. You are sitting in a corner, watching many couples dancing and hoping to return home soon, when you see him arrive; he smiles at you, but he doesn’t talk, and he simply offers you his hand.

You accept it. You accept him, and he accepts you, even if no words are spoken that night. Many curious, indiscreet or outright derisive stares follow you, but nor you nor Adar take any notice of it. You dance for a long time, happy to be with each other; he doesn’t need you to talk to recognize the connection that has already blossomed between the two of you, and you are moved by the beauty you see shine through his scarred skin, the beauty of a spirit that is more precious than any jewel in Middle-Earth.

In the two years the follow, a deep friendship grows between you. It is Adar’s idea to create a new language for you, made of gestures and instead of spoken words. Together, you make a list of words and simple sentences and decide hand movements to translate them; your relatives and his accept to learn this new language, and in time you are able to communicate, if not freely, much more easily than before and without having to relay on the written word.

“You have made me able to speak.” you tell him one afternoon; you met next to a small pond midway between your villages for a lunch on the grass, and after eating you have taken a walk in the woods, as you teach Adar to recognize the plants and the herbs growing around you. “I will never thank you enough."

“I am happy I could help you; maybe now it will be easier for you to build relationships with other people.”

“Maybe; but even when I have a thousand friends, I won’t forget those I had before.”

That is the day of your first kiss; at sundown, he has walked you home as he always does, and your mouths meet under the leaves of a centuries old oak; he holds your hips in his hands, while you caress his face and his hair, and you see him mouthing your name, and there is something so sensual and visceral in that sight, that the chaste, vaguely shy kisses you are sharing become something much deeper, erotic and romantic at the same time: it is a kiss as sweet as a rose blossom.

You are already sharing a bed, you know his body as well as your own, its beauty and the mesmerizing way it has to join with yours, when he takes your hand in his, one afternoon you have spent bathing in the river and then letting your skin dry under the sun, laying on the grass. “Will you marry me?” he asks, and those are signs and gestures you have never used, but you understand them nonetheless, and the emotion that fills your heart is so intense and deep that you are left speechless - even if you could actually talk.

You don’t say yes. You don’t sign it either, but the happiness in your smile and in your tears leave no doubt about your answer, and Adar is laughing and crying, and you are laughing and crying with him, as he picks you up and spins you around.

In the centuries you and your husband spend together, you never hear his voice, nor he yours, but that doesn’t bother either of you; because you both understand what is in each other’s heart without the need to speak it, and the way your heats beat as one is more sincere and complete than any language in Middle Earth.

This piece was inspired by Joseph Mawle's real-life hearing impairment and his movie Soundproof (2006). Check it out of you can!

Tagging @starlady66 and @grinkitty​. 

[rvnawaytrain]

👫 !!!

SEND 👫 FOR FOUR RELATIONSHIP HEADCANONS | OPEN & ACCEPTING

*GRIPPING YOU SO TIGHTLY* Kit I love the sisterly bond Doe and Reese have, I can and will talk about them for hours, my babies, my daughters who are damned by the narrative!! I will bend so many rules so they know happiness on GOD!

Thank you so so much for the ask, I had so much fun writing this!

Doe gives, or rather gave Reese rides to school often! Either on the back of her bike or in the backseat of Doe's guardian's car! It's a little thing, but that's sort of the foundational pillar of the role Doe plays in Reese's life. She's maternal, but not a mom. Sisterly, but not her sister, unfortunately (though Reese really wishes she was). Doe is a babysitter and best friend, her wing man, confidant and maybe a bit of a role model (though Doe would be horrified to think of having THAT responsibility), she's not family but she's the family Reese needs, Reese deserves, and Reese WILL get.

It's like, it's best summed up by the Snowflake Ball in the Stranger Things verse. It was a real, foundational memory. Zoe, ever the romantic at heart, wanted to go so badly, two friends going together wouldn't be weird and they could dress up! It would be fun! Reese couldn't think of anything more miserable but Zoe's smile and her laugh, it seemed to bring sound into a world of silence. Reese wanted to make her happy and wanted to have fun with her, despite her nerves and the anxiety, and the knowledge of her mom and her presumed reaction to wanting to go to the dance. Day of, Reese was filled with nerves and dread, her mom didn't come through to help, but she never actually did. It was no surprise but it hurt, hurt BAD, not even Zoe's reassurance could dull the pang of 'the one time I wanted to do something, something SHE would have wanted me to do, and where is she?' running through her mind on repeat... then Doe came, Doe swept in rather like a whirlwind. ALL of her makeup, ALL of her (and Sally's!) hair stuff, accessories bundled in an old grocery bag and grin stretching into the sky. Doe was so ready, happy, excited to help the girls and doll them up for the occasion! She's been hoping for something like this! She'd even bought magazines for inspiration! The night went from anxiety and frustration, yet another ocassion ruined and one Reese was one foot out of the door from already: to one of fun and joy and stupid silly embarrassment at Doe's jubilation and the ridiculous lengths she went to make the night good. How the hell did she rope Tommy into this?! Was she blackmailing him? Reese laughed too loud at the sight of him in a paper faux chauffeur hat to question it. The night was saved, it was great, she felt loved and she quickly felt the pain from the rejection and worry move to the back, out of sight, out of mind.

That's sort of just how Doe's presence and joy shapes that space of pain and vacancy with Reese? Doe can't fix things, she can't save or stop Reese from being neglected by her mom, or singlehandedly end the rumor mill, but she cares for her without needing to be begged or thanked, it's an ease for her and the joy they have together doing that: caring for each other and being friends, it makes some of that pain float to the back of her mind.

Reese knows about Doe's preferred names in all verses, but especially verses where she hasn't lost her memory! (i.e Fear Street, FNAF, Stranger Things, The Lost Boys, etc.) and uses them thusly! However, after a particularly bad incident she learned about when Doe got 'caught' using one of her preferred names, Reese switched to using nickname work around in public settings! Like Snoopy! It's kind of how the nickname culture between them arose! Necessity born of compassion for Doe's situation (for the most part), turned to something funner and more loving that began being reciprocated! Doe is always trying a new nickname that starts with R with each conversation! Rockstar being Reese's least favorite, but something about the way Doe said it with the finger guns and big grin like she was so proud... dork!

There was a rumor for a while that Doe was so in cahoots and involved with Reese because she was actually after one of her brothers and trying to get to them through Reese. It uh, it was an obvious lie to anyone who knew them more personally. Doe never really paid much attention to Reese's other siblings except when giving them some of the 'care' Doe did for Reese (like leaving the food full of left overs that they could heat up later cause their mom didn't cook, or leaving their laundry folded in the basket too) I will say: Doe being closer in age to Tommy WOULD have opinions on him, but she never voices them, especially not around Reese. Does she sometimes think he's a bit of a shitty brother for leaving Reese in such a lurch and feeling more abandoned to face the rumours about him (stranger things, CFP too) and their parents neglect/unfair treatment? ABSOLUTELY. But Doe can recognize: she's not in the situation and she has her own hurt from being the left behind youngest child. It won't help to push that onto Reese, Tommy and Joey.

How did Doe and Reese meet? Though it changes in every verse, ofc, the uniting thread with all of them is Reese being left behind or getting into trouble. Falling on her face flat in the skatepark and scratching herself up bad with no adults around. Lost up in the branches of the tree, frozen in terror, shaking and completely disconnected with the outside world. Sitting on a bench kind of staring vacantly while the park around her is in celebration. Or waiting outside of the shitty school, no adults in sight while Doe is picking up her kid sister/Reese's low-key girlfriend. Reese is a kid left behind, but Doe is too, she can't justify leaving her to sink or swim and be another voice lost when people aren't willing to hear. Doe can hear, Doe is willing to hear, and happy to. Reese is a good kid, troubled but kind, it really hurts Doe to see just how little the world around her seems to care. The apathy and the ease of writing her off, it makes Doe angry, but it's a constructive anger. They won't see, they'll be willingly blind and deaf, but Doe will make sure Reese gets through. Reese will see a better day, and by the time the world starts to pay mind again: Reese will never look back at the audience that scorned her.

[hyenahunt]

Saga: Epilogue - 1

Writer: Akira

Season: Winter

Characters: Jin, Jun

Proofreading: 310mc (JP) & hyenahunt (ENG)

Translation: kotofucius

Jin: I’d risen from my grave by mistake, but you've struck me dead once more.

[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]

Location: Reverse Live Stage

Jin: “♪~♪~♪”

Jun: “~…♪”

(GODDAMN! This is so freakin' hard! I’m going at full throttle to kick Sagami Jin's ass, y’know~!?)

(I’m baring my fangs and howling at him, with every intent to strike him dead!)

(But thanks to that damn video that just played, the audience just sees me as some kinda huge starstruck fan of his…)

(And every time I lunge at him, they just start squealing!)

(I can hear 'em now… “Oh, he loves him so much!” “He looks so happy getting to sing with his idol!” “Congrats on your dream coming true!”)

(Couldja not look so fondly at a scene like this~!? I mean, c'mon!)

(Damn it all! Well yeah, my dream did come true, but it's a world away from what you guys think it is!)

(So don’t look at me like that, I'm begging ya~ Why the hell did things turn out like this!?)

Jin: …Sacchan. You’ve gotta focus~ Both your singing and dancing aren't looking too hot. You doing okay? Getting tired?

Jun: 'Scuse me? “Sacchan”? Don'tcha go acting like we're friends, Sagami Jin!

Jin: Well, you’re always calling me by my full name too… And that feels so dead-serious that it's kinda scary…

I’d be a lil' more comfortable if you could ease up and just call me something like Jin-san.

Jun: Haha! Well, if it bothers you so much then I’m just gonna keep calling you Sagami Jin~!

So if you’re giving me an annoying nickname in return just to get back at me, I guess I can't really complain, huh~?

Jin: Hmm, not quite… Calling you Sazanami just makes me think of your dad, see.

And since our names are kinda similar, saying your first name feels like saying my own… so I thought I'd try a nickname.

Jun: Seriously? We’re nowhere close enough to be using nicknames! You better keep in mind that video was edited and nowhere near close to reality!

So if you'd kindly not confuse the two then I'd really appreciate it! You’ve always been and always will be my most resented foe, got that~!?

Jin: I do get it. It's only natural that you hate me — It's what I deserve considering all the people I trampled over just to climb to the top.

Among them were parents who had mouths to feed, along with innocent people who had done nothing wrong… Really, I always knew a day like this would come.

That's why I chose to run away back then, disgusted with the yakuza-like business I was doing.

Jun: ……

Jin: Y’know, Sacchan… I’m kinda confused, too. I thought that even if you were to hit me or kill me, I had no right to protest.

Jin: But take a look. When I actually surrender to fate and face you, our audience cheers in delight.

And it's not 'cause they’re thirsting for violence, no. Nobody wishes to see that.

And well, showing people things they don’t want to see — Is that really what an idol does?

I don’t think it is. No… in fact, that's what my kids taught me. I’m supposed to be the teacher, but I just keep learning new things from them.

I wish I could’ve learned all this much, much sooner. That’s why I’m passing it down to you, while you still have your whole life ahead of you.

'Course, I know it's nowhere near enough to make up for all the pain I caused you and your dad…

Jun: ……

Jin: …That video… truly opened my eyes. It made me really understand the atrocity of the things I’d done.

And what I'd done… was destroy a family and ruin a child’s life.

Join us for Project-Saga, the revival of legendary idols, they said… I let myself get taken in by such a drunken plan, see…

Even I ended up giving in to the fun, and I let it guide me here as if it were all a nice little dream.

But of course, that wasn’t right. You reminded me that I no longer deserve to be an idol.

Jin: I’d risen from my grave by mistake, but you've struck me dead once more.

Won’t you make do with that? If I’m such a condemnable eyesore in your eyes, then I’ll disappear for you. If you want me to beg for forgiveness, then I’ll beg 'til you’re satisfied.

Even if I offered up my life, I still can’t possibly make up for the peaceful family and happy childhood I stole from you.

But it’s all I have, so I’ll offer it all up to you.

So just… Don’t lay a finger on my students. They’re innocent.

No — I'd like you to also forget your hatred and live on happily, with a smile. What must I do for that?

I may be a teacher, but I don't know a thing, so won't you teach me…? What must I do to atone?

Jun: …What must you do, huh?

Haha. Honestly, I’m already plenty satisfied, just from getting to see that look on your face and hearing you say those words.

Hell, from that very moment in SS when you were the one rooting for me from the audience —

You could say that already helped to save me.

Nah, actually… Being found and taken in by Ohii-san…

And becoming an idol great enough to stand on the same stage as you…

That must’ve already been all that I needed. For a wild stray that had lived by scavenging carrion to survive, it's plenty more than enough of a reward… You could say it was my salvation.

[ ☆ ]

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