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writing-in-april · 3 years

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April Fools

Spencer Reid x Female Reader

Summary: Spencer needs to one up Reader just as he’s about to loose a prank war

A/N: I’m kicking things off for my 30 fics in 30 days for April with this fic inspired by April Fools day- lol this is a much better version compared to what I have experienced in the past with this holiday 😂 @90spumkin there’s a few specific lines in here that are totally inspired by your cowboy Spencer fic lol 😂 I’d like to hear all y’all’s thoughts so far or just drop me any type of anon here- ask me anything -my requests are also open!! Hope y’all enjoy reading ☺️

Warnings: 18+, Dom Spencer (not as harsh as in other fics of mine), Fingering, Edging, Public Sex, Sex with a hidden motive (there are some real feelings there 😉 plus reader acknowledges and knows the hidden motives)

Main Masterlist Word count: 2.4K

When you walked into the bullpen it was dead silent. If you dropped a pin you’d be able to hear it, even with the carpeted floors. You crept as quietly as you could, afraid that someone might jump out to scare you. It was not as if you had gotten in late today, you were actually cutting it rather close this morning.

Your fear of being submitted to a jump scare so early in the morning wasn’t as irrational. Today was the day that everything was going to come to an either a glorious defeat or a momentous victory. A two week long bet was tipping heavily in your favor at the final hours, you had to be careful to not let your hold over Spencer weaken in these last moments.

Today was April 1st- a day like any other to most people, but not to you and not to Spencer. It had all started when you both had begun trying to do little pranks on each other in the months leading up to the bet. If you asked anyone on the team they’d say it started when you replaced his normal standard deck of playing cards with a new set that had awkward pictures of Spencer you had accumulated over the years taped on them to represent each of the numbers and faces. Your personal favorite was the photos you had chosen for the Queens- one of Spencer looking rather regal, eyes cast downwards and with his hands crossed and a big lip pout while sitting at his desk obviously disproving of whatever Derek had said (who was also in the picture)

The team would’ve definitely said it had started there, but that was the first one that they had seen. The first one had actually been when Spencer had switched around the contacts in your phone while you weren’t looking while you had been hanging out with him. To be fair it had been in retaliation to you playfully teasing him about being a technophobe, all’s fair in love and war you had to admit.

And, whether you admitted to him or not, you did love him. This little bet that you set a few weeks ago had only strengthened your feelings. It involved setting a prank for each other, alternating every other day for two weeks until April Fools day, then the team would judge and figure out who one. You can definitely thank Morgan for that brilliant idea as he had spontaneously suggested it after your card prank on Spencer, though you bet he had been thinking about it for a while. Over the course of two weeks you had to delve into the mind of Spencer, really getting to know what would get under his skin, what would be the perfect prank for him.

“I hope you know what you got yourself into Spencer.” He had smirked back at me when you said that right after confirming your bet. You had delved into researching stuff, trying to figure out pranks that would be more personalized to Spencer rather than the ones everyone would see passed around. Eventually you landed on an idea for your last prank that was simple, yet the perfect way to get under Spencer’s skin. It was so easy you kicked yourself a little for not figuring it out before.

Apparently replacing the sugar Spencer specifically brought in for himself with salt was a step too far according to him. The glare that he had fixed on you after he had spit out his coffee onto his cardigan made you shiver, you knew you were going to be in for something big today.

Plus today was the aforementioned holiday that inspired the bet in the first place, you kind of wished you had gotten the chance to have the last laugh. You were still crossing your fingers and toes in hopes that it wouldn’t compare to your coffee prank.

Your eyes locked on the lone figure standing in the maze of desks, Spencer. It felt as if you were both ready at high noon for a duel to see who drew their gun fastest. Though, comparatively there was a distinct lack of cowboy hats and the sun was down to low for a proper duel. That didn’t stop your mind from wandering to thinking about him in a cowboy hat, he’d definitely look good. you’d have to get him one some day or maybe put a snake in a cowboy boot if another prank war was to ever crop up.

“Where is everybody?” You asked, though you knew that Spencer had probably sent them off elsewhere, you had done the same thing earlier when you needed to convince him that he had come in on his day off.

“I may have bribed them a bit to be elsewhere right now.” He spoke with a smirk that would have seemed foreign to you until you guys had started this. Now it was a staple for him whenever you saw him, going right along with his cardigan and tie to complete his look. There was no complaint from you, Spencer acting slightly cocky just before you were about to get pranked on oddly made you get hot and bothered easier than you’d like to admit.

Pushing those thoughts aside, you crossed your arms in front of you, probably a vain attempt to protect yourself from whatever was coming. Your voice came out a little shaky, “What for?”

“Just wanted to talk to you- privately…” He skated around your question, not really giving you any definitive answer. Though, you hadn’t really expected him to lay out his whole plan, that would just be counterproductive. There was a slight pause in conversation, you were about to break it with your own response when he added,“You know I’ve always found you desirable, Y/N…”

The simple teasing conversation that you had been having with him suddenly pivoted. The air in the room felt like it had been sucked out, leaving you gasping. Even if some part of this led to a prank, you knew Spencer wouldn’t play with your feelings like that. What was most likely happening is that he was using this confession to also pull a fast one on you. His deep brown eyes piercing into your own told you that he was telling the truth in that regard, plus if earlier in the bet was any indication, he wasn’t that good of a liar.

“This wasn’t what I thought you’d be talking to me in private about but- I’ve always found you desirable too...” You admitted with a gulp, pressing your weight into the edge of your desk almost sitting on it.

Your full weight pushed to sit fully on top of your desk, undoubtedly crinkling some important papers underneath when he stepped forward to close the large gap between the two of you. The tension was thick around you now with only two sentences spoken, both full of truth.

“Do you want me as much as I want you?” His lips were now so close to yours his breath was projected onto your lips.

“Yes.” You confirmed, with no hesitation. Honestly, you wouldn’t care if there was some sort of prank he was going to play on you soon, you knew that what he had said didn’t just apply to now. That was the part that mattered to you.

His lips surged forward to meet yours, letting all the tension that had been rising boil over. It was everything you had imagined and more, his lips just as soft and pillowy as they had been in your dreams.

When he pulled your skirt up roughly to expose your bottom half to him you came up off of the edge of the desk slightly, then being pushed back down once you were partially exposed before him. You squeaked into his mouth in shock of how fast this was escalating, but didn’t protest any further, wanting to see where he was going with this. You were so glad that he had gotten the team to leave the bullpen for a while, this would be a hard situation to explain. Being out in the open didn’t make you more nervous though, it excited you to know that someone could be around the corner with only the desk dividers hiding your exposed bottom half.

He didn’t even bother to push your panties down to your knees or ankles. He just pulled them aside to gain access to your now positively dripping hole. You hadn’t even thought to question how this tied into his prank, like it inevitably did, yet. You just wanted more of him, in any way you could get him.

His eyes were fixated on your dripping entrance, seemingly mesmerized by finally being able to see it. The awe in his eyes certainly did make you feel adored by him, but your desire made you feel impatient, “Spencer, do something or I’ll take care of it myself.”

A growl was all you were going to get in response to your desperate snarky comment. He then brought his hand up to suck on two of his fingers, his pointer and his middle. But, instead of then putting them to good use to help you reach a peak he stalled some more by bringing them up to your own mouth.

“I want you to suck too.” A little whine was all you could give in response before letting his fingers inside your mouth. You sucked diligently, making sure to get them wet enough for you.

Once he was finally satisfied with your efforts he removed them, a slight popping noise escaping. Bringing his hand down slowly was just another attempt to tease some more, but you knew that he’d reach there eventually. No matter how hard it was to be patient, you did so, though with a bit of squirming.

Your hips bucked up immediately in response to his fingers coming into content with your clit, Spencer’s other hand came down to press your hips back down again. He spent his sweet time playing with patterns, circling your clit a few times slowly before switching to a faster figure 8 pattern, seemingly just to get you more desperate.

“Spencer- again if you don’t do more I’ll take care of it myself!” You snapped harder with more venom this time, patience wearing dangerously thin. You thought you heard a small whisper of the word brat underneath his breath, but you decided to table it when he finally did oblige you.

You had to bite down on your lip hard when he stopped circling your entrance to plunge two of his fingers inside of you. The pressure on your lip was most certainly almost enough to break the skin while he began thrusting his fingers inside you in a steady rhythm, crooking them perfectly to make you see stars. You had to bite your lip so hard to combat the raging moans that wanted to escape from you due to the pressure he was putting on your gspot.

He brought his thumb up to circle your clit again once he saw that you were getting close, helping push you closer towards the edge. Your lungs were heaving in gasping breaths mixed with desperate moans as he continued to add stimulation to your most sensitive spots, hitting them perfectly with each crook of his fingers and circling of your clit.

Just as your orgasm was about to wash over you, all of his movements stopped abruptly. The euphoric stimulation you had been feeling was ripped away from you, his thumb on your clit halted, the curling of his fingers ceased, and his mouth that had been pressing kisses and hidden hickies to my collarbone had concluded its actions.

“April fools.” He then removed his fingers from me and promptly sauntered off to his own desk with no other words for you. Your legs were still shaking, more now from being edged to the point that you fully had to sit down onto your desk to try and regain your composure. Your jaw also was hanging slack in shock in contrast to how hard you had been biting your lips earlier while his fingers had been inside you.

A little glance from Spencer was thrown your way that was probably to gage your reaction,

you spotted even in your disheveled and distraught state. You had to admit, it was not what you were expecting and he had got you good. Your plan paled in comparison by far considering you were just going to have the entire office call him Stanley all day- and of course steal the coffee grounds to see if you could provoke an even bigger reaction out of him.

A deep sigh came from you, an non verbal admission of your glorious defeat. He had well and truly got you, it wasn’t as if you could exactly defend yourself and your pranks to the team during judging. Not that you really wanted to defend them, there was no reason to, he had well and truly beaten you. You could accept when you had been beaten, you’d accept defeat with grace. Though you definitely still feared the idea Spencer would come up with as a consolation prize for his win.

Reaching down with your hands to a stack of files on your desk you absentmindedly straightened them, then sitting down in your desk chair. You wriggled around a bit, feeling the dampness in your parties, already regretting sitting down. With another sigh you nodded towards Spencer, an acknowledgement of his momentous victory before getting up again to go clean yourself up in the bathroom to clean up- and maybe splash some cold water on your face. Though by the smirk on his face, there was no way this wasn’t going to happen again. And, maybe with him actually letting you finish or not, the thrill was sometimes in the chase of one. You’d also have to think of your own way of retaliation in the future of course, just because you accepted defeat just now doesn’t mean there wasn't a longer war to be won. Plus perhaps you will admit your deeper feelings for him that you could now see lying beneath his eyes as well, feelings much deeper than desire.

Safe to say you just told the team that you lost fair and square, not divulging why no matter how much Penelope pried. It was without a doubt, a glorious defeat.

—

Tag list (message me if you want to be added):

All works: @shotarosleftpinky @90spumkin @kyra-morningstar @s1utformgg @takeyourleap-of-faith

All MGG characters: @muffin-cup @willowrose99

Spencer Reid/CM: @calm-and-doctor @destiny-tsukino @safertokiss @slutforthegubes @onlyhereforthefanfics

Dom Spencer: @rainsong01 @evlfknb

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid smut #spencer reid fanfic #criminal minds x reader #matthew gray gubler x reader #matthew gray gubler #matthew gray gubler smut #criminal minds #mgg #mgg x reader

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ellana-ravenwood · 4 years

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“I wish I knew how to help you” - Batsis x Batfamily

Synopsis : Everyone has tough times at some point in their lives. Bruce Wayne most definitely knows that. But when his own daughter is going through a really rough patch, he finds himself not really knowing how to fix things...

This particular subject has been requested so many times (the earliest request dating from August 2018....mmmm..), so watch me butcher it with bad writing. I thought, given how I feel lately, it was the perfect time to finally write it. I hope you will like it (runs away to hide) :

TW : Anxiety, depression, mention of suicide.

My Masterlist : @ella-ravenwood-archives.

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There hasn’t been a lot of time in his life where Bruce Wayne felt so completely lost. Of course, he would be lying if he was saying he never got confused, or if sometimes, he wasn’t quite sure what to do, what to say...

But if there was one thing he was great at, it was problem solving.

Even in desperate situations, he could always trust his analytical and collected mind to help him out.

In fact, Bruce Wayne could count on the fingers of one hand the amount of times he felt utterly lost, defenseless, and couldn't figure out a solution to his troubles. Not even a questionable one, like bottling up all of his feelings and pretending he doesn’t care while he’s screaming and dying inside.

He recollected exactly five times of such an event occurring in his life :

The day his parents died.

The day he realized he couldn’t save everyone.

The day Dick came to live at the Manor, and Bruce realized he had no idea how to raise a child.

The day Jason died.

The day he saw Damian kill.

And now, spilling onto another hand :

...The day he realized he had no idea how to help his daughter, you, with her mental health struggles.

Each time he had been completely lost, there was someone to help him.

For his parents’ death, it was Alfred.

For the day he realized even as Batman he would never be able to save everyone ? It was Commissioner Gordon, and his years of being a cop in a city like Gotham.

Dick himself, and Alfred of course, quickly helped Bruce to understand what it meant to be a father.

Tim’s arrival helped him grieve Jason.

And all his children, from Dick to Cass, and the experience he acquired trying to raise them helped him manage Damian’s problems. It was a plus for sure, that the boy wanted to be helped.

But with you...Any attempt of his trying to breach the subject would result in you brushing his concerns off, getting frustrated, or sighing “I’m fine” and leaving to isolate yourself in your room.

Sometimes, it felt like you really wanted to talk to him. Like you wanted to vent, and tell him what was wrong. But you always seemed to decide against it, maybe in fear of bothering him ?

Most of the time, it felt like you were living with your anxiety in peace. Like you greeted it like a good friend. Bruce had always known you were a rather stressed individual, but you always held yourself up so well ?

Most of the time, it felt like you were perfectly fine. How could he have known ? How could he have known you weren’t ? Ah...but maybe the signs were all there all along...

And Bruce just didn’t know how to help, when even you, didn’t seem to want the help...But maybe that was the trick ? To keep trying no matter what ?

At first, it didn’t seem to him like this would be an issue that could render him absolutely lost like this. And he hated the fact that he thought that.

Because it stemmed from one pervasive thought that made him despise himself : “Her fight with her own mind aren’t as bad as Damian’s, Cass’s, or Jason’s trauma. Aren’t like what Dick went through. It will be easier to fix.” And maybe you felt that, maybe that’s why you wouldn’t let him help ?

Why would it be easier anyway ?

Because you had a calmer childhood. Of course, being Batman’s daughter meant you definitely went through things most children will never experience. But compared to your siblings, you had a somewhat normal childhood.

The biggest trauma of it being the fact your mother, Selina Kyle (author’s note : I’m not particularly talking biological child here by the way, just to make sure y’all can all identify to this. Thought I’d mention it), decided to leave you in your dad’s care and had a very little part in your upbringing up until you turned 12 or so, which is the time she came back. You never seemed to even be mad about this. It always felt like you knew your mom had her own battles to win, that she wasn’t quite ready to have a child, and you forgave her as soon as she came back into your life.

But maybe that was the problem ? The fact Bruce always thought you were strong enough to handle things ? You always seemed to hold your own. You’d always been fiercely independent. Like you never needed help.

When Dick had fits of anger, you’d just stay quiet and withhold it.

When Jason was sometimes overzealous, you’d just stay calm and collected.

When Tim had massive freak outs at times because he felt he wasn’t enough, you’d just reassure him and stay grounded.

When Cass would have nightmare at night and be so scared she couldn’t find her voice again, you’d stay up with her and make sure to soothe her back to sleep, even if it meant not sleeping yourself.

When Damian would realize how much he missed out in life, in his childhood, and how little he knew about the real world...You’d be there, holding his hand while explaining in details why he felt the way he felt.

Even Duke, who arguably was the “sanest” of them all, had times where things were too much for him, and you’d magically appear by his side to help him through it.

You always seemed to be the one everyone relied on.

The one that has it all figured out, that has it together. The one most like Bruce, able to control her emotions. But the one even better than him, because you could also help others understand how they felt.

And that was why Bruce never really noticed your every day struggles.

Come to think of it, the fact you were always so on point and great in your explanations as to why someone felt the way they did, probably meant you felt like them before...

Oh god. God, Bruce hated this. Hated himself, even.

Hated the fact that he thought your fights with your own mind weren’t as bad as what Damian or Dick went through, as bad as Cass or Jason’s traumas. As bad as Duke witnessing what happened to his parents, because you...Well you still had both of them. And they were on good terms, now.

He hated the fact that it took you almost dying for him to realize you had a real problem too. For him to realize your apparent “I can handle my own” attitude was all a fragile facade that could break any time.

He hated the fact that he had to witness you almost letting yourself die, to realize this...The scene kept replaying in his mind.

A night out as vigilantes. Part of a building collapsing. You pushing a woman out of its way, but then just staring up at the crumbling wall that would crush you, not moving. And the state of daze you were in, when you found yourself in your father’s arms as he saved you in extremis from a certain death that you were clearly letting happen.

You later said it was a mistake. It was a simple mistake.

But Bruce, from that point and on, knew better. There had been a time, not long after his parents’ death, where he wondered what even was the point in living anymore. Where he found himself in a similar situation too, where he could save himself and yet stayed in front of the death threat. Alfred saved him at the time, gave him a good scolding which Bruce didn’t even register.

He recognize that look in your eyes.

Because he had the same one, many years ago, before he had a chance at having a family again. Before you, Dick, Jason, Cass, Tim, Damian...It was a look that meant : “What if I just let it happen, what if I end the pain by ending it all ?”.

And Bruce hated the fact that it took him witnessing this look in your eyes for him to finally realize you needed help. It tore his heart apart.

He hated the fact it took him so long to finally act upon it, to finally do something for you. No matter how lost he was as to where to even begin.

And so here he was, on a calm night in Gotham, sitting on a roof and researching on the internet what can be done to help people riddled with anxiety and such. He knew you enough to know you’d never accept to go see a therapist. But maybe...maybe he could help just as good ?

He knew how he got rid of his own anxiety.

The same way he got rid of many other things...He submitted himself to a strict training allowing him to control all of his emotions, shutting some away when needed.

But he couldn’t even imagine making you go through the things he made himself do. Not his daughter. Not any of his children.

There was a reason, the training he gave all of you wasn’t even 10% of what he used to do. Because he had nothing to live for except becoming strong enough to bring back justice to Gotham. Because he had nothing to look forward to except the fact that he was going to make sure no kid in that god forsaken city would go through what he went through ever again...

He gave himself the ability to turn into a machine. To shun all feelings away. Because he had a mission.

He would never, ever want any of his children to feel like this. Even if he managed to, in appearance, make himself feel nothing...It would always cause him tremendous pain. He knew how this felt, to force yourself to control everything.

No. His method was most definitely not fit for his daughter. He did not want her to become like him. And so, scrolling through forums, websites and blogs, he tried to find the best way he could to help his kiddo. It seems like there was almost like a “list” of things every person suffering from anxiety went through every day...

Wondering if your loved ones are upset with you.

“Are you mad at me ?”

Is the text you send to your oldest brother, Dick, immediately regretting it.

Because now, you were sure he’d find you annoying, pushy or anything of the like. Of course, Dick would never. But your mind was telling you he would.

He hadn’t responded to your text in a day, while he would usually be very reactive, and you didn’t need more to think he hated you, now.

Knowing there is no reason for you to feel that way.

Knowing for Dick to be “mad” at his little siblings, it would take a lot (you weren’t even sure you’ve ever seem him mad at any of you, except maybe the times you put yourselves in danger while he’s your team leader, but then it’s more a problem of being mad at himself than really at you.

Yet you cannot control it. You cannot. You are sure now, that he hates you.

Your father doesn’t understand why you’re so morose that day, and why you snap at everyone. He doesn’t understand, and you don’t tell him. And Bruce just ends up thinking you’re in a bad mood and leave you alone, while you desperately want to talk.

You want to tell him that you think Dick hates you. You want to hear him reassure you, even if technically, there is no need for reassurance. Of course your brother doesn’t hate you, he’s probably just busy, he just started his new job in Bludhaven, and moved in a new apartment and...Yes.

Rationally, of course you knew your brother, who has always been there and never shied away from saying he cared about you and love you, doesn’t hate you.

Yet you cannot help but think you did something wrong. You cannot help but think maybe he does. And you want to tell your dad, and have him reassure you, even if you don’t need to.

But instead, you snap at him. Instead, you push him away. Because you couldn’t handle your dad too thinking your annoying. Of course, he would think you’re annoying, a nuisance, if you told him you think Dick hates you...because obviously he doesn’t.

It was a vicious circle. So instead of possibly-but-probably-not-but-still-maybe be hurt, you pushed the one person you wanted close away, snapping at him and isolating yourself in your room.

TING ! Your phone, it’s ringing ! Oh please god, please be Dick !

It is your brother. He answered !

“Of course not ! Why would you think that ?”

You analyze every single word, and how he didn’t use an emoji, while he always does ! And the way he said “why would you think that ?”...he’s for sure mad at you now, and he thinks you’re the most obnoxious little sister that ever walked this Earth.

But you answer :

“Oh no reason lol. Hey wanna binge watch Gilmore Girls with me this week end ? Only you understand how a true masterpiece this show is.”

He doesn’t reply that day, and you think about it the entire night. He doesn’t come at the patrol of course, as again, he just settled in Bludhaven. And it starts. The spiraling of overwhelming feelings, the impossibility to let go of something.

You cannot think of anything else but sending another text to ask if he’s really not mad at you. You decide against it, because you don’t want him to think you’re annoying. Because you understand he has his own life now. Now that he moved from the Manor.

You understand he must be busy. That he has to settle in. That he doesn’t have to be available whenever you want, and that the fact he had always been up until now proved he was the best big brother anyone could ask for.

But you can’t help it. You think it must be you. That he’s not answering because it’s you.

And all of a sudden, you question every relationship you have. What if none of your siblings love you, and are just polite ? What if they’re lying because you’re really the only sibling out of all of you they don’t like and they’re just too nice to...Oh god. Your dad must hate you too.

Because you keep needing him to reassure you about stuffs. Ah yes, today you shunned him away, but sometimes, you guilt trip him so he says he cares about you. Or so he tells you nice things.

And suddenly, one of your biggest fear, the one where you ask for too much out of the people you love is back. And you cry. You cry all night. Because you have too many mood swings. You isolate yourself too much. But you don’t know, you don’t know how to make them see your fear of not being cared for...

And so you cry. Wondering over and over again “why am I like this ????” as you think all of your loved one are upset with you, and will never want to talk to you again.

Later in the day, Dick answers that he would love to watch GG with you, and there’s an emoji this time. Ah. So maybe he doesn’t hate you...

So many people wouldn’t even think this was a big deal, but for you...for you, it was...

Every small decision feels like it has life or death consequences.

You want to tell them. You want to tell them that’s why you couldn't choose what you wanted at the drive through fast enough. Why you stumbled on your words, and ended up blurting out : “Whatever Jason took !” because your taste in food was the closest to his.

You want to tell them, that even such a small issue, in your head, took a huge place. That you rehearsed what you were going to say when it would be your turn to speak to the waiter. That you got all tangled up, and didn’t ask what you actually wanted.

You want to tell them that sometimes, even the smallest “yes or no” question haunts you for days. That “what ifs” won’t let you alone.

You want to tell them, but instead you take the meal you didn’t really want, and eat it in silence, listening to everyone talking and enjoying this family moment. You stay quiet, your mind focus on how clumsy, dumb and useless you are.

Just because you couldn’t order something at the drive through.

You stay quiet, but your mind is racing about how much you suck. How you should get out of everyone’s way. Because you can’t even order food properly.

You feel guilty, because this is one rare family moment when you’re all together, and your siblings all have fun teasing each others, laughing and talking, while you just nod sometimes, smile, and die inside.

Just because you couldn’t order something at the drive through.

You think you’re absolutely insane. That you should be checked in in Arkham. You-

Bruce notices you’re quieter than usual. He notices you didn’t take your favorite burger. He wonders why, because he knows you really REALLY like that burger. Sometimes, he goes out of his way to go get you guys’ favorite food, and he knows that this burger is one of yours...

But he doesn’t dwell on it. Maybe you just wanted to change for once (which wasn’t much like you but oh well). And the fact you’re quiet ? Maybe you’re just lost in your own thoughts and day dreaming. After all, you do like to have some quiet and alone time, and this family dinner is happening on this time.

So Bruce doesn’t say anything, even if his guts tell him something is wrong.

Overthinking. Fearing something could go wrong.

You are in constant fear of what's going to happen if and when something happens to your dad ! Or your siblings ! What if you become homeless for some reasons ? What if you have no friends or family to return to ? What if what if what if what if what if what if what if what if what if what if what if...

Intrusive thoughts, they call them. And they don’t want to leave for sure. They’re persistant. They stay up until you overthink them to the point nothing makes sense anymore. To the dissociation.

And it makes your every day life a living nightmare.

Bruce, as he reads this part of an article on the internet, about how people suffering from anxiety are in a constant state of worry, feels his heart tighten at the mere idea you are going through this.

He knows you are. And he hates the fact it took him so long to realize because...

Not being able to control what's happening now or in the future.

Bruce could recollect so many times where, even as a child, you’d ask him questions like : “What happens after you die ?”, “What will happen to me when I get old ?” etc etc.

At the time, of course, he dismissed it as questions every kid asks. Wondering about the world around them. He never saw how much those questions would haunt you, how much sometimes, you couldn’t let go of things you perfectly knew you had no control over...

The signs were all there though.

You weren’t lost in day dreams, you were lost in nightmarish scenarios about what could possibly happen in the near future.

You were, every minute of every day, worrying about something that was currently happening, something that happened recently, or something that might happen in the next few moment, later the same day or in the future.

It was something you had to live with, and it never been just a child curiosity. As you grow up you stopped asking those questions out loud, didn’t mean they weren’t haunting you...

Making a mistake that will result in someone judging you.

You always had to be irreproachable.

You were a perfectionist.

A lot of time, people passed it as : “like father, like daughter.”

And Bruce should’ve known better...Why was he like this ? This part of him certainly didn’t stem from anything good. Yet he ignored the fact you acted exactly like him. The fact you were turning into him, on that front...

My brain is a TV and someone else has the remote.

... ... ... ...

************

Bruce had enough. He knew. He knew how you felt, and why you acted the way you did sometimes. And it was time. It was time to finally take action.

But he couldn’t do it alone. And he wouldn’t. In fact, they’d all be so mad, if he executed this plan on his own...

Because you. You were their precious sister.

They loved you, so much. And it would kill them, if they knew you really meant it, when you asked if they were mad at you. If they hated you. If they...

They always think you’re joking, or that you’re tired or something. That you have “mood swings”.

You don’t.

For you, all those issues are very real. But they don’t understand, because you’re always there to catch them, and they never expected you needed to be caught.

So when their father expose to them what he thinks is going on with them, and when they realize he’s right...

They feel crushed.

How ? How could they not notice their beloved sister was suffering so much ?

And so that day, they all swear that they are going to do everything in their power to help you. No matter what.

They will never give up on you.

No matter what..

************

“Why am I like this ? Why am I like this ? Why am I like this ?” You repeat to yourself, over and over again, as you feel your heart beat like crazy while it has no reason to.

While your chest hurt, and you feel the weight of anxiety on your shoulder, without even knowing why.

You keep telling yourself you suck, you keep being too harsh on yourself, and oh, oh if you only knew that your entire family right now, was plotting to help you feel better.

Unfortunately...

************

Dick’s antics soothe you for a bit, but as soon as he’s gone your heart goes wild again, refusing to stop, and your mind repeats bad thoughts to you.

The next day, Dick planned the PERFECT sister/brother day. Planning things to spend time with you, just like when you were little and it was just you and him.

It’s a perfect day indeed. Everything makes you forget your anxiety. You smile, for the first time in months since this weird extreme anxious state started.

Dick always knew how to make you laugh, and how to tease you just enough so that you wanted to show him what you were made of !

But once you’re home...

And Dick can try, try and try again, but no matter his effort, he can only relieve your pain when he’s around, and unfortunately, he isn’t always around.

************

Jason is patient, with you.

He listens, he empathizes and does not patronizes.

He’s there when you need him. He celebrates every small victory from you (like finally being able to order the burger you want). He encourages you, gives you all the hope he can. And it means a lot, coming from him.

Because Jason suffered a lot. He went through a lot. His death, and his traumatic return...

He tries to keep you hopeful. He is patient. Available. But he does things too well. You’re afraid he spends too much time with you, and forgets his own mental health. You know he loves to meditate, but haven’t seen him do it in ages.

Because he’s also keeping an eye on you. Your father probably told him the crumbling building debacle...And now he makes sure you’re ok.

But to the detriment of his own mental well being ?

You feel like you’re weighting him down. And slowly, he notices you’re avoiding him. And he doesn’t know what to do. He doesn’t want to push you, or force you to do anything...

************

It has always been easy, to talk to Tim.

Your brother is the only one in the family that did not become a Robin for personal reasons. Sure, he was struck with tragedy later in life (or he would never be your brother now...), but at the core of it...He was just a kid who wanted to help.

He was a fan of Batman, who really REALLY wanted to make himself useful. He became Robin, not because of any personal motivation but because he was just that selfless.

And so, it has always been easy to talk to Tim.

Which is why he’s surprised, when he realizes you’ve never told him about your anxiety. About your depressed thoughts. You vent a lot to him, but about small things. About things you can both laugh about.

It has always been easy to talk to Tim, and the fact you cannot address your anxiety problems tells him all the extent of it.

Tells him you’re truly suffering, and that he needs to get better.

To become an even better listener, for you. And as you witness him, just like Jason, sort of forgetting about his own well being, you cannot help but feel even worst...

They mean well. They mean so well. But you cannot stand them putting their own health on the line just for you. After all, you’re just a loser who doesn’t deserve any of those wonderful brothers and sister...

************

Duke tries to help you “temper your thoughts”.

His mom used to do that to him, as a child. He was always rather active, suffering from ADHD and such. In a lot of ways, his trouble resembled the ones you had with anxiety.

And he thought that maybe, helping you tempering your thoughts would be the best.

What does that even mean ? Well. Whenever he felt like you were anxious about something, scared or stressed, he would ask you if you were alright up until you’d finally tell him what was making you anxious.

And then he’d ask you the series of question his mom asked : “What’s the worst that can happen ? What’s the best that can happen ? What’s most realistic, or likely ?”...At first you didn’t really understand the point.

But soon enough, you got it. This was helping you turning your intrusive thoughts against themselves. Helping you see the good sides of things.

Unfortunately, just like with Dick’s technique of making you laugh and such, when Duke wasn’t around to remind you to consider the best, worst and most likely option...you forgot that trick.

************

"Let’s go to a quieter place, or go for a walk.”

Cassandra tells you, whenever she sees you get overwhelmed by something. And it works. It does.

You two just walk in silence, hand in hand.

Your sister’s presence reassuring, and warm. Her care for you sipping out of her very being, from her hand to yours.

“Let’s go to a quieter place, or for a walk.”

You go outside, and you don’t speak. She’s just here for you.

But she can’t always be around, can she ? She can’t always just magically appear next to you in moments of need, and say :

“Let’s go to a quieter place, or for a walk.”

But when she can. She does.

She knows when you get overwhelmed by sounds, by smells, by anything. And she brings you to places that makes you feel at peace.

Cassandra was never one to speak a lot, but she always understood.

************

Damian can’t help but feel sad that he, and the rest of the family, aren’t enough for you to feel better. That they can’t win against your depression and anxiety, no matter how hard they try.

And Damian. Oh Damian tries.

He makes sure you have everything you need. He makes sure to be there when it feels like you’re not feeling well, he follows you like a shadow and...

You both get more and more frustrated.

Damian puts a lot of effort into making you feel better, and you keep snapping at him, or pushing him away.

It’s because YOU’RE the big sister. YOU’RE the one who’s supposed to take care of him. But it seems like lately, Damian is obsessed with your well being, and he doesn’t even let you tuck him in anymore...He’s the one that comes tuck you in.

And deep down, you feel like it’s exactly what you need. You want to let your baby brother take care of you. And his worries are so sweet, and makes you feel all warm inside by how adorable this kid can be. How far he came back from.

Deep down.

But you’re not ready to admit you need help. Especially not from your 11 years old brother. No. He’s the one that needs the cuddles and the reassuring words. He’s the one that had it way tougher than you. And him taking care of you, although it feels nice, doesn’t feel right.

And it hurts, to see your little brother get sad because he can’t help you like he wants to. Because he thinks he’s not enough for you, and that’s why you’re feeling the way you are...

************

Nothing goes how they think it was going to go.

You do not get better right away. It doesn’t even feel like you’re getting better at all. On the contrary.

It feels like you push them away even more, that you become even more irritable, that...that...that you go further and further away from them.

And they don’t understand.

Even you, don’t understand.

Why do you feel so bad ? So Sad ? So anxious all the time ?

You don’t know. You don’t know. You don’t know.

“Why am I like this ? Why am I like this ? Why am I like this ?!”

You repeat this to yourself every day, without being able to find an answer.

And Bruce...Oh, your father came to the conclusion that the last and only option is that you need to go to therapy, you need professional help.

************

“What ? Why ? I’m fine dad !”

You say, anger pointing in your voice, as he tells you that.

“No you’re not, (Y/N). We can all see it. And there’s so much we can do we...I...”

There’s a silence. A heavy one. And it breaks Bruce’s heart, to see tears welling up at the corner of your eyes :

“It’s fine. I get it. I’m too much, aren’t I ? That’s why right ? I ruin you guys’ life ? You know, I noticed a shift not long ago. I know you’re trying to make me feel better, and I know you all get frustrated because you can’t. I swear I try dad. I swear I try to not get those bad thoughts. To not think you don’t love me, for whatever reason. To not think like I’m a burden. I swear I try to not be anxious. I try to not worry, about every little thing. I try so hard ok ?! But it doesn’t work ! And I know it’s wearing all of you down. I know it. But...I’m...It’ll be fine ! IT’LL BE FINE !!”

You scream those last few words, and a silence installs itself between you and your father.

Bruce just looks at you, and you cannot stand the pained look in his eyes. You never wanted your burden to transfer on your family like that...why ? Why did you get worst and made them notice you weren’t ok ? Why ?

Maybe it would’ve been better, if your dad didn’t see you about to get crush by this building, and hadn’t saved you. They’d have a-

“I won’t stop trying.”

Your father’s voice cuts your terrible thought, and you look up at him. He walked slowly to you, carefully, as if afraid to scare you. As if afraid you’re gonna “tt” him, and run to lock yourself in your room.

But for some reason, you don’t move. And you let him come close.

He brushes a few fingers on your cheek, as he used to when you were a child and unable to sleep. Him softly humming to you and brushing your cheeks slowly always made you fall right asleep...

“Until you feel better. And I will tell you over and over again that I love you and that I am here for you, if it’s what you need. I am your dad. I am here for you.”

And he understands your pain oh too well. It’s not because he managed to be able to shut his own mental health problems out, that he never feels them.

You are your father’s daughter. Unfortunately in that case.

Oh. Oh he wishes he could take on your pain. He could take on his shoulders your entire burden. He wishes it was only him, that felt that way. That you would never, ever feel anxiety, or depression again.

He knows it is not that easy. He understands.

“I’m not going anywhere.”

Something breaks inside you. Something that was on the verge of shattering for years, but snapped only now.

“I just...I just wish I could help you. I just wish I knew how. I am trying too, (Y/N). And I won’t give up on you. No matter what you think. I will never give up on you.”

Those words. Those were so simple. Yet what you needed to hear for so long.

Because no matter your siblings’ effort, or Alfred’s, or your dad’s. Your friends at the Young Justice. Anyone you ever cared for...You always were afraid that one day, you’d be too much for them.

That one day, all your mood swings, pushing them away, venting and complaining often...would be too much. And that they’d leave you.

Alone forever.

“I’m not giving up on you.”

Coming from your dad. You knew he said the truth. You knew.

There’s a short silence. You look at your father, and even Queen Anxiety couldn’t make you think he wasn’t being genuine.

“You...That’s...I...”

Getting chocked up, you weren’t able to say anything, but he understood.

And he was there to catch you. You went right into his arms, and he held you tight, trying to convey to you all the unconditional love he has and will always have for you, no matter what.

No matter how much you push him away, how broken you get, how much you hate yourself and think you don’t deserve any kind of love...he’d always, ALWAYS love you. And would never give up.

“I’m here. I’m here. I will always be here.”

His voice was soothing. It has always been soothing. And he was there.

He was there.

“Thank you...”

You manage to whimper out, as he holds you against his heart.

And, finding it hard to reign his own emotions in (his children have always been the only ones who could cross all his walls and find the vulnerable Bruce who feels everything), Bruce repeated as much as you needed to hear that he was here.

He would always be here for you.

Always..

And the path to your recovery was now open.

__________________________________________________

Here we are. I am sorry if this is sort of...bluargh. Or not what you wanted. But I do hope you liked it. Haha I feel like this story is so ridiculous...I guess this feeling is in the theme eh..........Maybe it’s also because as usual, I wrote very late into the night, and sleep deprivation always make me feel like I do stupid things. Write terrible stuffs.

Reblogs and feedbacks are always welcomed ?

Haha. Convincing.

See you soon with another story, much lighter than this one for sure haha...

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starbuckie · 3 years

Text

Malia’s 400 Follower Writing Challenge!

Hey there, my gorgeous, lovely followers! First of all, thank you so, so much for 400 followers!! This is incredible that there are 400, let me repeat, four-fucking-hundred people following me on this hellsite, that enjoy my friendship and/or writing. It’s nearly been a year on tumblr, and every piece of writing I’ve published, the friends I’ve made have just been absolutely monumental in my life. 4 is one of my lucky numbers, and so as a tribute to that times 100, I figured that now would be a great time to have a writing challenge. As I work on a few fics of my own, I’d also love to see what y’all come up with as well, so let’s go :)

CHALLENGE MASTERLIST

rules (ugh i don’t like that word let’s go with guidelines):

- you don’t actually gotta be following me, but that’d be pretty cool

- if you could be so kind, even if you don’t participate, please please reblog, as that would be very much appreciated

- to participate just send me an ask with the prompt or prompts you’ll be using, and the character you’ll be writing for. you can definitely choose two prompts from separate categories, but remember that prompts will become unavailable after two requests

- i’m pretty versatile with fandoms, so i’m gonna say marvel, harry potter, supernatural, star wars, criminal minds, bridgerton, and any sebastian stan characters, but if you’d like to write for a character not in any of those fandoms just tell me in the ask (so basically any fandom, i don’t know how to speak)

- please be x reader! doesn’t have to be fem!reader at all, but please make it y/n

- the fics can be any length, a drabble, headcanon, oneshot, twoshot, series, just make sure to tag me in any multipart fics because i’d love reading all your amazing fics

- while any fics are welcome (angst, fluff, smut, darkfic), i draw the line at incest and pedophilia, and make sure to TAG AND WARN YOUR FICS PROPERLY. if you are under eighteen and i see you have requested to write a smut fic, i will say a big fat NO because you should not even be reading that.

- to make sure i see it, make sure to use the tag #mals400followerwritingchallenge and tag me in it

- if i don’t reblog your fic within two days just shoot me an ask or message because i may just be dead or my tumblr is being stupid, and i will get my ass in gear

- all the fics will be put on a masterlist i’ll have on my masterlist as they are submitted, and it will be reblogged every time a new fic is added

- i know a lot of us may be in school right now or have jobs and families and shit just happens and sucks sometimes so i’m gonna make the deadline june 30, and you can sign up or submit any fics until then :)

NOW FOR THE PROMPTS:)) btw, all the line prompts are from @a-cure-for-writers-block

angst line prompts:

“This will be the last time you lie to me.”

“You know it’s not like that.”

“How could you think this wouldn’t hurt me?”

“You’re never going to be the same after this.”

“I just think it’d be best if we never met.”

“I can’t believe you would even think to leave me like this.”

“You never loved me, did you?”

“It didn’t have to be like this, but now you’ve ruined everything.”

“What did you want once this was all through? Tell me!”

“You could’ve- could’ve stayed. You could’ve helped me fix things.”

“This isn’t going to be fixed. You’ve ruined this for good now.”

“I hope I’m not put in the same part of hell as you.”

“When did you think you could hurt me again? Today? Tomorrow?”

“You’re back in my life and I want to die again.”

“You only ever brought me pain and I’m sick of it.”

“You put yourself in that position! That wasn’t my doing!”

“When was it that you realised that you didn’t love me?”

“I really think it’s easier for people when I’m not around.”

“I know, but you didn’t have to use them like that!”

“I’m not someone who breaks easily, but I must commend you on this.”

random line prompts:

“You look like you’re going to punch me.” “I was actually going to kiss you, but if you’re into that sort of thing then I’m out.”

“I mean, if we hadn’t met at a strip club.”

“Can we get coffee?” “Is this a date or is it because you’ll end up strangling someone if you don’t get caffeine in your system.” “I shouldn’t have asked.” (@spaceodditybarnes with Bucky Barnes or Chris Beck)

“… and then he came up up to me and kissed me until I was-” “I’m going to have to tell you to shut up now.”

“We should do this again sometime!” “I would honestly rather do anything other than that again.” (@extremelyblackandwhite)

“I hope you don’t think that we all act like this.” “There’s more than just you? Jesus.”

“I’m just tired.” “That’s understandable. Go and sleep, I’ll sort everything out.”

“You drank it?!” “Yes, it was quite delicious, did you know?”

“Can you just act normal for this evening. It’s all I’ll ask of you.” “You’re asking for a lot then.”

“I haven’t got laid in like forever.” “Oh sorry, did I look like I was offering? Because I’m most certainly not.” (@adorkably)

smutty line prompts:

“Do I look like I’m messing around? Do I look like I won’t punish you?”

“Fucking is a reward, but you haven’t been good.”

“Move an inch and you won’t be coming tonight.”

“You look just about good enough to eat.”

“Take your clothes off. Right now.”

“We’re really going to fuck here? What if someone sees us?” (@bvckysmoon with Bucky barnes)

“Hands behind your back.”

“Open your mouth for me, baby.”

“Is it good when I touch you here? Or maybe here?”

“You’re so in for it when we get home.”

“You can take it, you’ve done it before.”

“Just a little more.”

“I won’t apologise for marking you up, everyone should know you’re taken.”

“Suck on my fingers.”

“You look so good with my hands around your neck.”

“Keep your eyes open, look at me, baby.”

“Look how good you take it.”

“My baby, you did so well.”

“God, you feel amazing.”

“Swallow. All of it.”

tropes:

enemies to lovers

friends to lovers

mutual pining

arranged marriage

sex pollen (@jimmypagesandbrianmayshair)

sharing a bed

slow burn

arranged marriage

unrequited love

childhood sweethearts

fake relationship

roleswap

established relationship

AUs:

Highschool AU

Soulmate AU

College AU (@spaceodditybarnes with Bucky Barnes or Chris Beck)

Coffee Shop AU (@jimmypagesandbrianmayshair)

Detective AU

Historical AU

Bodyguard AU (@i-am-a-closet-fanfic-fiend with Steve Rogers)

CEO AU

Bakery AU

Royal AU

Mob AU

Mythology AU

Modern AU

Hospital AU (@captainscanadian with Bucky Barnes)

Bakery AU

Demon AU

(Guardian!)Angel AU

Criminal AU

songs:

Burn - Hamilton

Dancing With Your Ghost - Sasha Sloan

Tears Dry On Their Own - Amy Winehouse

Silly Girl - Chloe Moriondo

Me and My Husband - Mitski

Something - The Beatles

Uptown Girl - Billy Joel (@blueberrythor with Bucky Barnes)

I Can’t Help Myself - Four Tops

She - dodie

Let’s Fall in Love for the Night - FINNEAS (@subtlebucky with Valkyrie)

Everybody Loves Somebody - Dean Martin

A Sunday Kind Of Love - Etta James

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jojo-reader-hell · 4 years

Note

This one might need a trigger warning. So this is a really strange one and one that might go unanswered because it's gonna be one of those kinds. Secco and Cioccolata with a kid. Took the kid from one of the women he's killed (be it that he removed her infant from her body or her arms is up to you.) I imagine that he'd give it to Secco to take care of.

Ok but whilst looking for the perfect GIF of both these characters I literally found the most perfect one that exactly captures the face I make when I get a request that begins with “I don’t think you’ll do this one but...”. Bold of y’all to assume I don’t salivate over the most unusual requests and rush to do them. If I’m struck with an idea the writing flows so much easier. By all means, I’m an author, I love a challenge ;) Sorry if this is OOC however, I don’t know too much about these characters so I had to do some research.

Because I know how it goes, this will be put under a cut. But thank you for submitting! I hope this was what you were looking for!

...

“Such a good baby, such a good Sugar...”

You’re special. More special than anyone else in the world, because you’re the only one in the whole wide world that gets to be held by your Papa without his Stand to cover him.

Papa Secco always holds you until you fall asleep, crouched over your bed and rocking you even though you’re already twelve years old and a big kid now according to Cioccolata. You don’t need to be rocked anymore, but that does not matter to your papa, and honestly you don’t know how you’ll be able to function if there’s a night that you’re not coddled and rocked to sleep.

“Made pictures today.” you tell him, absolutely wide awake because you’re being held by your papa.

“Did you?”

“Mmm, made one of Papa, one of my kitty, one of Ciocco...”

He giggles like a school girl. Praising you more than ever, rocking in a manic panic back and forth that only makes you calm as the dizziness hits. This is all you’ve ever known. You don’t know any other kind of love, and the dizziness makes you giddy, almost like being drunk (although you’ll never know that feeling, Cioccolata was adamant that Secco make sure no vice would mar his innocent little pup). Instinct compels you to wrap your legs around your papa’s waist, nuzzling into his neck when the dizziness makes you a little too sick. The effect is instantaneous, and Secco slows himself down in a rare display of self control, patting your back through your pretty star pajamas and kissing your soft neck. He inhales your scent, like he’s huffing paint, exquisitely high on the calming scent of the baby shampoo you’re still using.

You tell him with a bit of a sleepy slur in your voice that you left your pictures on the little table where Secco spends time feeding you for every meal, and you hope that when your Papa wakes you up for breakfast in the morning that he squeals and coos over the drawings, surprisingly detailed for such a young artist. Gifted. That’s what Cioccolata called you as he held you up in bloody hands, watching with morbid fascination as you mimicked your dying mother, sucking in deep breaths and not even crying for the first few moments of your life.

“Bellissima.” Cioccolata had murmured, placing you in Secco’s arms all warm and swaddled in a fleece blanket that he’d stolen from the nursery your father had set up. “Look, such a sweet and calm baby. Already curious about the world. You have a gifted baby. So very smart, already knows who Papa is. When they don’t cry after being separated it means they know they’re safe. Look how happy your new baby is to be in Papa’s arms.”

“My Sugar is such a wonderful artist...” Secco coos, kissing all over your face with sloppy abandon, “So talented. Love you.”

Immediately you perk up, lips splitting into a large smile.

“Loooooove you.” you parrot, drawing out your words.

“Looooooooooooooooove you more.” Secco mirrors your smile, almost unhinged, his pupils dilating.

“No! Loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove you so much more!”

The game continues back and forth, you and Secco trying to outdo each other every single time. It’s a game. A ritual. The most special aspect of the relationship you have with your one and only family that you’ve ever known. Being such an obedient child has earned you lots of rewards, and being coddled by Secco is one of those cherished forms that you’ll never tire of. Not that there would be any doubt that the rewards would continue even if you misbehaved. Secco was of the philosophy that you were a special child, not just for your gift of artistry or your calm demeanor in the face of pure psychosis. Your forced birth, thirty five weeks early, endeared Secco to you. When he had been given the responsibility of caring for you, he never left the side of the incubator that Cioccolata had stolen to put you in. It helped to regulate your body temperature for a few weeks, until you were strong enough to do so without its help. The only times you cried was when you got impatient waiting for Secco to finish making your formula, but that was to be expected.

“Just like me.” Secco would smile at his master.

“Precisely. So impatient when waiting for a sweet treat.” would be the reply.

“My sweet treat.” Secco asserted, nearly melting when he felt Cioccolata stroke the crown of his head.

“Yes. This is your baby. Your very own special treat for being such a very, very good boy and getting that nice shot for me.”

“My Sugar...” Secco had whispered to you in the incubator.

You had smiled, the first one ever in your life.

And so he claimed you for the next twelve years.

You were an experiment to his master, just to see how one exactly went about raising the perfect child. But to Secco, you were perfect already. Every aspect was perfect, from the way you responded so positively to his unhinged love, to the way you behaved now, letting Secco get under the covers with you and putting your thumb in your mouth, murmuring a last protestation of how much you loved him more and sleeping like a baby the minute he calmed himself down to get you to go to bed.

“Such a good baby.” he murmured into your ear, mindful not to disturb your rest. “Such a good, good Sugar...”

#cioccolata and secco #secco #cioccolata #secco jojo #cioccolata jojo #secco x reader #cioccolata x reader #platonic #parenting #gore tw #death tw #tw kidnapping #tw torture #jojo's bizarre adventure #jojo's bizarre adventure vento aureo #jjba #jjba va #jjba x reader #jjba reader insert

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mychemicalimagines · 4 years

Text

Imprinting Changes a Man-Paul Lahote-Chapter 2

Summary: Growing up in a small, close-knit tribe in the great state of Washington, the Chief’s daughter, Melissa Black, has her entire world flipped around when she finds out the legends she grew up on were true. What will happen to her, her best friend, and the rest of the guys they grew up with? Will life ever be the same?

Warnings: Cussing, Bella-Bashing, Leah-Bashing, Possible Eventual Smut

Words: 3185

Tag List: @elskinner45, @jayrart, @paullahotes, @laurastrutz, @k-n-e, @oopsiedoopsie23

A/N: I hope you guys like this chapter! @you-a-southpaw-doll and I decided to change up some parts of the story. There is no Emily. Mel is taking the place of Emily and Rachel. Someone else will be Sam’s imprint later. If you have any questions or concerns please either message me or @you-a-southpaw-doll or submit to our ask boxes! COMMENTS PLEASE:]

Italics are Pack Mind Conversations!

I hang up the phone after talking to my dad. We never thought that we would get another wolf so soon. Since the new wolf just phased an hour ago, and I was with Sam when he did, dad suggested that Sam and I be the ones that help the newer generation of wolves in the tribe with their phasing. Dad says he trusts us and he saw how I helped Sam through his phase.

I couldn’t believe it when dad told me that he believed in us to be the ones that tell the others what’s going on, and how to help them through their first phases. I walk over to the kitchen, grabbing the flour and cocoa to start making my famous brownies. I made these the day that Sam phased and they helped him feel a little better.

I hope these will help the new wolf feel better about everything. I mix everything in the bowl and pour it into a pan. After I put it in the oven, I walk upstairs to the pile of clothes that I keep in the spare room since Sam brought them over. I grab two pairs of shorts and walk back downstairs. I check the oven quickly before walking out the back door.

I lay the shorts on the banister and stand on the porch for a little bit. I try to listen for voices or sounds in the woods, but the only thing I can hear is the wind blowing. I sigh and walk back inside. It ain’t for another hour until I hear voices outside the door. I look up from the pan to look out the window.

I can’t tell from how dark it is outside so I go back to cutting up the brownies. I start hearing their conversation from outside.

“How are there shorts outside already?” A new voice says, from outside.

Jared! That voice belongs to Jared Cameron. He’s the new wolf!

“You know the Chief’s daughter, Melissa?” Sam says.

Jared doesn’t reply but I hear the shorts be removed from the banister and zippers being pulled up.

“She is part of the council and my best friend,” Sam explains. “This is her house.”

“Will this be the...like...the meeting house?” Jared questions.

“Yeah. It’s where I am most of the time anyway, when I’m not on patrol.”

I look up when I hear the back door slide open. Sam walks through first and smiles slightly. He moves out of the way to show Jared walking in behind him. Jared keeps his head down as he walks further into the house.

“Hi, Jared.” I say, softly.

He looks up and the edge of his lip curls up in a smile.

“It’s okay. Are you hungry?” I ask him, moving the brownies to a plate.

He nods and walks over to grab a couple pieces.

“Grab as many as you want.” I push the plate closer to him.

He mumbles a ‘thank you’ and Sam ushers Jared to a chair at my small table.

“You can ask us any questions you might have.” Sam tells him, while grabbing some brownies.

“Why? Why do we turn into giant wolves?” Jared asks, after a few minutes.

“You know our legends?” I ask him.

He nods while taking a bite of his third brownie.

“Well...that means Cold Ones are near making the wolf gene agitated.” Sam says.

He explains the legends in more detail and everything that it means to be a Spirit Warrior.

“You also get a tattoo!” I say, excitedly.

Jared chuckles slightly. “But what about my parents?”

“I’m sorry, Jared, but they are unable to know. All they will know is that you are working for the council now.” I say, softly.

He sighs and leans back into his chair.

“That also means you can’t hang out with your friends anymore.” Sam informs him.

“Wait. I can’t hang out with Paul anymore?” He asks, looking up from the table.

“No. Anything can happen. Your anger is going to be easier to express now, so we are keeping you from school. We don’t want any accidents to happen.” I say.

He nods before looking away slightly. I reach over and gently pat his hand.

“It’s for your safety, Jared. We don’t want anything to happen to you or anyone else for that matter.” I gently explain.

***

As the days go by, Jared starts to come out of his shell. We come up with a schedule for the patrol for when Jared does finally go back to school. He’s still technically a senior in high school, so when he goes back, he’ll still be one. Sam and I have discussed that school is super important. Even as a Spirit Warrior, we want to make sure he still get good grades.

“So...I’ll just tell them that I had to deal with a family emergency or something that kept me from coming to school?” He asks as we finish up the schedule and final school details.

Sam nods. “Yeah. You can just tell them that you had an uncle in England who was dying and requested you specifically to take care of him, so you had to go. And, after taking some personal time to cope with his death, since y’all were close, you were able to go back to school.”

Jared nods. “I can get behind that. Then again, I don’t really know if anyone would actually ask where I’ve been. It’s not like they notice me when I’m there.”

We talk about it for a little bit, and in an attempt to cheer Jared up, I still telling him jokes and puns. Similar to what I did with Sam when he first phased. Over the course of the next two weeks, we help him with the transition, and get him ready to go back to school like he hadn’t missed anything.

When the time comes for Jared to go back to school, he spends the night before his first day at my house. The morning of, he comes down, in his pjs. I look up as I finish cooking breakfast.

“Come on, wolf boy. You need to get ready for school.” I tease Jared.

I start putting out plates of bacon, eggs and sausages.

Jared smirks at me. “Mornin’ to you too. And, it’d be wolfman. I’m not a boy anymore.”

I laugh. “Hush and sit like a good boy.”

He chuckles but does as he’s told. I hand him his plate so he can start eating. I clean up from breakfast, only taking care of the dishes I used to cook. I leave the other stuff out since Jared’s still eating. Sam comes down, and sits at the table, fixing himself a plate too. Ever since he and Leah broke up last week, Sam’s been staying with me, in the spare room.

I feel bad about their break up, ‘cause I know Sam really liked her. But, Leah was a bitch and only looked out for herself. She also couldn’t understand why Sam was hanging out with me more often since he phased. And...she wasn’t Sam’s imprint, which only upset Sam even more. I don’t mind him staying with me.

It’s like the sleepovers we used to have when we were little. Plus, I know it’s been hard on him, not really having anyone else to talk to ‘bout the whole phasing thing. I give a soft smile and keep cleaning. The three of us talk until Sam goes back upstairs to get ready for his patrol. I look at Jared.

“C’mon. Go get dressed. School starts soon.” I say.

He chuckles. “Yes, mom.”

I laugh and flip him off, playfully. He chuckles and finishes his last bite of eggs and bacon. As he walks upstairs, I finish cleaning up the kitchen from breakfast. By the time I’m done with the last dish, Sam’s already left for patrol, and Jared walks down, backpack slung over one shoulder. I dry my hands and look at him.

“Ready?” I ask.

He nods. “Yea. I guess.”

I walk over and gently pat his shoulder, disregarding the fact that he’s nearly a foot taller than me when he stands.

“It’ll be ok. Just try to stay away from things that might upset you, ok?”

He nods. “I’ll try.”

“Good. C’mon. Let’s get you to school. We gotta stop and pick Jacob up on the way.”

He nods and we head out to the truck my dad’s been letting me drive. On the way to school, we get Jacob. I drop the two of them off and head back to the house to rest a little bit before I have to start cooking lunch for the pack, which only consists of the two guys. I look at the time a few hours later to see it’s almost time to pick up Jared.

Even though he’s 17, I have to drive him to and from school now. He didn’t have a car yet so his mom was taking him. I told her I would take him to and from school since he’s ‘working’ for the council now. She understood and even told me a few days ago that she put Sam and I down as emergency contacts and we’re able to talk to teachers about him.

I told her she didn’t have to, but she insisted since he’s mainly working for the council. She even said he’d probably call us first anyway. I grab the truck keys and my wallet and walk out to the truck. I drive to the school and wait outside the front doors. Jacob is going to Embry’s house today so he didn’t need me to pick him up.

I see Jared talking to Paul outside. I roll down my window.

“Jared! Come on!” I call out to him.

I see Paul shake his head and walk away. Jared walks over and gets into the car but slams the door.

“My door better not be broken, Jared Cameron.” I say, glancing over at him.

“Sorry, Mel.” Jared mumbles.

We ride back to my house in silence. I pull into the driveway behind my house, causing Jared to jump out and run inside. I scrunch my eyebrows in confusion and turn off the truck. I step out and walk inside to see Jared slamming his books onto the table.

“Jared Cameron! What has gotten into you?!” I snap slightly.

“It’s not fucking fair!” He snaps right back.

“What isn’t?”

“I didn’t choose to turn into a wolf! I can’t even hang out with my damn friends! Paul wanted to go throw the ball around on the beach today to practice, and I can’t because I’m a fucking Spirit Warrior who has to go on patrol. I can’t even tell them! It’s fucking bullshit!”

I notice Jared starting to shake slightly.

“Jared, you need to calm down.” I say, softly.

“No! You don’t understand!” Jared snaps once again.

“You are not phasing in my house.”

He rolls his eyes and pushes past me to go out the sliding door. I bite my lip in anger and turn around walking out the door behind him.

“Jared, none of us choose for this to happen.” I whisper slightly, hoping that helps him.

“Nothing is happening to you, Melissa. You’re the golden child on the council. Perfect life, perfect family!” Jared shakes harder, turning back around.

I look up to see Sam running toward the house. He runs around Jared and stands in front of me.

“Jared! Get to the woods! You’re starting patrol early.” Sam says.

“No! It’s your guys’ faults that I can’t go hang out with my friends!”

“You know why you can’t hang out with them.” Sam says, putting his hand up to shield me slightly.

“Because I turn into a wolf. Big fucking deal! You’ve been shifted for months and nothing happened!”

I walk around Sam to stand in front of Jared.

“Jared, it’s because he took control of his emotions. Right now you’re letting your anger get the best of you.” I say, softly.

“No! It’s not! My emotions are fine!” He snaps.

What I said makes him even angrier because he starts shaking and breathing hard.

“Mel...Step-”

Before Sam can finish his sentence, Jared phases right in front of me, causing a giant brown paw to swipe down in front of me. Pain shoots through the right side of my face, chest and my upper arm as I fall backward onto the ground. I see blood gushing from my chest as more blood falls into my eyes.

I look up slightly to see a guilty looking brown wolf, staring back at me, before the pain completely takes over and I pass out.

Third Person P.O.V.

Sam rushes over to Mel as she lay bleeding on the floor.

“Jared! Get to the woods now!” Sam commands.

Jared whimpers before backing up and running into the woods. Sam quickly picks up Mel before running to her truck. He lays her down in the front before driving quickly to the hospital. He makes it to the hospital just in time. The nurses and doctors take her to one of the rooms to begin to do their best.

Sam walks over to the telephone on the nurse’s desk and dials Billy’s number that he’s had memorized for years..

“Black residence.” Billy says into the phone.

“Billy? Get to the hospital! Mel is hurt...bad.” Sam says, quietly.

“What...What happened?” He asks.

“I’ll explain everything soon. Just get here!”

Sam hangs up, doing everything in his ability not to just slam it down. Sam walks outside the front door to sit on the bench outside to wait for them. He looks down at his shoes and the slightly damp dirt from yesterday’s rain. He sighs quietly to himself and brings his hands to his face, curling both into loose fists.

He rubs his eyes, much like a baby does when they’re fighting sleep. He presses his hands harder against his eyes, rubbing them till he sees stars. He does this, almost as if he’s trying to erase what happened outta his mind. It doesn’t work and he eases the pressure and uncurls his fingers till he just has his head resting on his palms.

He looks at his shoes, not knowing what to do and trying his best to keep calm so he doesn’t phase back. That’s the last thing he wants, and its the last thing Mel, and the others need right now. It only took Jake and Billy about ten minutes to get there. Sam looks up. Billy and Jake take in Sam’s appearance.

Shirtless, in shorts and tennis shoes, while covered in a lot of blood.

“Jake, go inside and talk to a nurse about your sister.” Billy looks up at his son.

Jake nods and runs inside as fast as he can. Sam looks back down and rubs his eyes once again, trying to push the tears away that he didn’t notice covering his eyes.

“What happened?” Billy asks, rolling his chair up to the bench.

“Jared...He was angry that he couldn’t hang out with his friends. Mel tried to tell him, but he was too angry. He...He phased, catching her face and chest with his paw. I couldn’t tell where else. There was so much blood.” Sam whispers, almost soft enough that Billy couldn’t hear him.

“Sam, it’s not your fault. It’s not Jared’s fault either. The wolf took control and he wasn’t ready yet. Mel is a Black. She’ll recover.” Billy says, rubbing Sam’s back.

Before Sam could reply, Jake walks outside.

“What happened to my sister?” Jake glares over at Sam.

“We were on the back porch. We heard a noise coming from the woods. We...we didn’t see anything so she got up and walked down the stairs but a bear ran down the hill. It got a swipe at her before I could do anything. I scared it away and brought her here.” Sam informs Jake, as he stares at his shoes again.

Jake sighs to himself. “Dad, we have to do something!”

“Don’t worry Jacob. We will get Charlie on it.” Billy looks up at Jake.

It wasn’t for another couple hours that a doctor finally walked out. Billy looks up from his lap to see Carlisle Cullen. Sam growls slightly, going unnoticed by Jacob. The only reason it’s okay for Sam to even be on Forks Land is because La Push hospital wouldn’t have been able to save her. They don’t have the necessary equipment for this type of accident.

“Don’t worry. She’s safe and her vitals are stable. She’s got three long scratches down the right side of her face going from her temple to her chin. It’s honestly a miracle that it missed her eye. She’s also got three more going from her collarbone to her breast, and three smaller ones on her shoulder going down her bicep just an inch. They are deep enough for them to be scars for the rest of her life. We have put her in a medically induced coma so she can rest for awhile while we pump blood into her and she can heal.” Carlisle informs them.

Jake tears slightly before looking away. His older sister, the only one that stayed behind, is going to be scarred forever because of a stupid bear. Billy takes in a huge breath. His daughter is now scarred for life because of the wolves that protect their tribe. Sam looks away, sighing heavily. If he was just quick enough to pull her out of the way then his best friend would be fine.

Sam looks up at Billy. “I’m...I’m going to go tell Jared.”

Billy nods and whispers. “Let him know. It’s not his fault.”

Sam nods and walks out of the hospital. He runs toward the woods, making sure to pass the treaty line before phasing.

Sam’s P.O.V.

I hear Jared whimpering in our mind connection.

“Jared?” I say.

“Is...Is she dead?” He asks me.

He hasn’t read my thoughts so he doesn’t know what happened to her. I flash my memory of what the Cullen said to us. Jared whimpers louder. I read his thoughts and run to where he is.

“Jared, Mel will be just fine. She’ll be scarred, but it is not your fault. You just weren’t in control as much as you thought you were. Now you know why we don’t want you to hang with anyone outside of the pack. Mel isn’t going to be mad at you. She will be, though, if you keep kicking yourself.” I say, sitting my wolf down.

“Sam. I almost killed her!” Jared snaps at me slightly.

“Don’t yell at me.” I command him.

He whimpers slightly. Before we can talk any further, I feel another connection to the pack form.

“What...What the fuck?! Why am I a giant dog?” A voice enters our minds.

“...Paul?” Jared asks.

“...Yeah? Jared?” The voice asks.

#paul lahote #paul lahote fanfiction #paul lahote imagine #paul lahote x reader #paul lahote x oc #paul lahote x you #paul lahote x y/n #paul lahote x ofc #twilight #twilight imagine #twilight fanfiction #twilight imagines

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boulevardk · 4 years

Text

Upcoming Works!

(Upcoming BTS fic themes below)

Hey all! I know it’s been a while since I have updated or posted... I’m sorry about that! I just finished AP testing. And between you and me, I’m failing my English and AP Bio classes :)) I just finished submitting my intent to register for my college, and I’m still working with my parents to decide what my major(s) and minor(s) will be! I’m leaning towards microbiology/immunology or biomedical engineering. I plan on double majoring in film as well as one of the major mentioned above. I would like to minor in dance and/or literary journalism! I realize that’s a LOT (and all y’all in or having graduated college are probably laughing at me for what a clown I am for taking on so much work lmao). And they’re pretty different majors, but I’ve always had a lot of interests, and now I finally have the ability to pursue them!

As for my writing, I should be updating soon! I’m like 1/3 through my Jimin fic, and hopefully I can release it in the next couple of weeks. Can you believe it? I graduate high school in less than two weeks! I’m really looking forward to summer, because then I’ll be able to update and write as much as I want! To make the wait easier, I decide to reveal the themes and AUs of the rest of the member’s fics! They are listed below!

- Jimin: virgin sub!Jimin / succubus!reader / sex club au / supernatural au + smut

- Hoseok: CEO!Hoseok / stripper!reader/ strip club au + smut

- Yoongi: sugar daddy!yoongi / business au + angst & smut

- Seokjin: best friend!seokjin / high school au / friends to lovers / angst, fluff & smut

- Namjoon: teacher!namjoon / college au + smut

These themes may be subject to change... but they’re pretty set! I hope you’re looking forward to reading them! I’m really looking forward to FINALLY WRITING THEM OH MY GOD THEY HAVE BEEN IN MY BRAIN FOREVER BUT I HAVEN’T HAD THE TIME TO WRITE THEM :((

As for requests, I plan on writing them as soon as I’m done with the fics mentioned above! Thank you for your patience! As an impatient person myself, I really appreciate everyone’s support even though it takes me a while to update (oof). And believe me, I’m just as impatient to write them as you are eager to read! Thank you again for the continued support of Summer Solstice and The Girl of Your Streams!

It’s pretty clear that Summer Solstice was preferred over the latter fic.... Was it the length of the fic? The smut? The selected member? Theme? Let me know! Of course my own creative process and vision is important, but I would like to know more about why Summer Solstice is the preferred fic! Thank you nevertheless!

See you soon!

- Jay (5/24/2020)

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domitxnate · 4 years

Text

Let Her Go | Rynate | 09/20

Who: Nate Lynn, Rysan Fabray @ryansfabray

When: September 20

Notes: Heartbreak. Just, pure adulterated heartbreak on all sides.

Ryan

Ryan didn’t need the week. After her conversation with Jo and Noah, Ryan knew exactly where her mind was at. When she pushed her way into the apartment, her stomach flipped and her heart starting beating a mile a minute. She still couldn’t comprehend how much and how fast things have changed within a week. Perhaps she wasn’t as okay as she pretended to be and it was crazy how well she fooled everyone around her, including herself. She found Nate standing in the kitchen, staring into the fridge and she watched for a second before making herself known. She could see the stress she put him under and she hated herself for it. “Sir?” She asked as she leaned against the door frame leading into the kitchen.

Nate

He was still a mess, but when he looked up at the sound of the door, he did what he could to hide it. He shut the fridge and turned towards her. "Yes, Ryan?" he asked, the title off her lips like another dagger in his heart. He literally had no idea what was coming, but his body seemed to lean against the counter in an effort to prepare for the worst.

Ryan

Ryan snapped back. Who knew hearing her own name would hurt so much. It made her want to change her mind about everything. To put her collar back on and fall at his feet. But she knew that would only prolong the inevitable. Her hands were shaking and her heart racing. This was the lowest she’d felt in a long time. She hated that she was proving everyone right about her claim to Nate. She hated that she was the one who was causing all of this drama and turmoil. So before she lost her nerve, she took a deep breath and said the words she’d been dreading all day. “I‘m leaving.”

Nate

He had no idea how long he was holding his breath for, but hearing those words hit him like a cannon ball right in the gut. "You're...leaving," he repeated, mostly to keep himself grounded to the moment. He scoffed a few times, trying to keep himself as calm as possible. The fact was - he wasn't making her happy. And he wanted her happy. He was just going to let her walk away, but instead told her to wait and went into his room to grab her collar that he put back in it's box. He returned, setting it next to her. "It's yours. Sell it, throw it away, whatever ya want," he said with another sigh. "Look, I ain't gonna beg ya to stay," he began, "if ya ain't happy, ya ain't happy. And that's all I've ever wanted for ya, Ryan. Since we were 15. But...I need to know what I did. I need to know, what I did that made ya so unhappy."

Ryan

Ryan wasn’t sure what what Nate’s reaction was going to be, so she braced for the worst. When he merely mimicked her words she nodded to confirm. There was a moment where she thought that was it but when he came back with her collar, that’s what really crippled her. She looked at it but didn’t take it just yet. There was still so much for them to talk about. “You didn’t do anything,” she replied plainly. “I wanted submitting to be enough, I thought it was enough. I thought you were enough.” Those words sounded harsher than she intended so she followed them with an explanation. “You weren’t enough for me but that isn’t your fault. I’m just not fulfilled in my life currently. I don’t think I’ll be able to submit to anyone again, that was only for you. But I think I might be happier as a Domme.” She scoffed and laughed sarcastically. “I guess Russell was right about me after all.”

Nate

"So why now?" he asked, shaking his head, "It's been almost a year. And this really feels like 'all of a sudden.' I mean, is there someone else?" he asked, knowing that was blunt but also felt it was a fair question. When she said he wasn't enough - even with her caveat - it still made his eyes start to water. He wanted to point out she'd submitted to Mike on at least a couple occasions, but that wasn't worth the argument it would bring up. "First of all," he said as she finished, "He has never been right. And regardless of what's happenin' right now with y'all and me, that doesn't make him right. I just hope this all isn't comin' out cos he's gonna be here tomorrow."

Ryan

Ryan couldn’t help but roll her eyes at his question, as if any one person could be responsible for this, but she sighed and offered her explanation. “Because if I was able to pull that stunt I did last week. Disregarding all of the rules and intentionally disrespecting you, that means I don’t really respect you as my Dominant. Which means that this claim shouldn’t continue.” She bit at her bottom lip, eyes watering. “This has nothing to do with Russell. If anything, staying in a claim protects me from him. Which is why I’m going to ask you to let me be selfish for a little while longer.”

Nate

He knew that much was true - she didn't respect him. "Nah I guess not," he said simply, wiping his eyes. "But ya know what, since this is the end, there are some things I gotta say. Y'all humiliated me, Ryan. It was utterly humiliatin' to not know where ya were or who ya were with. Or to let someone take your phone and be a complete disrespectful ass. Y'all were collared and he just acted like I was the one bein' ridiculous. And since we're on that subject - I was always afraid of this. I told ya that I was, that I was afraid this isn't reallywhat y'all wanted and ya made me feel like I was being paranoid and like I didn't trust ya. Can't ya understand how that makes me feel right now? Given all ya know bout me?" he said, sighing again. "What do ya mean? Selfish how?"

Ryan

This was tearing Ryan up inside but she needed to keep herself together. There was no argument she could have given him to convince him of anything other than what he was feeling. “You’re right. Perhaps you just saw that clearer than I did because I really was sure that y’all were wrong about that.” She paused and dropped her head for a moment. “I’m sorry y’all were humiliated and that he disrespected you. But I can’t say I’m sorry for what I did. Cause then I wouldn’t have had this realization.” Her lip quivered and she avoided his eyes. “I’m sorry.” Ryan was starting to lose it, so she pinched the inside of her palm to keep herself grounded. She almost didn’t want to ask for her favor but knew if she didn’t there’d be hell to pay. “Selfish by asking you to hold off on announcing this until after parents week. By pretending that everything is fine until Russell leaves.”

Nate

At least she saw his side. But god, could she be anymore profession about this? Yeah, he knew Ryan well enough to know she was just trying to keep it together, but is still felt like she was just trying to get it over with. When she quit looking at him, he held in his own breath at the intensity of it all. He groaned at her request - was she seriously trying to kill him? "Look, we can wait to tell the heads and dissolve it - that's fine. Does that mean ya gonna stay here?" he asked, actually half hopin' she would say no. He wasn't sure he could live that kinda a lie, especially in front of his family while they were here.

RyanY

Ryan was startled when he groaned, the sudden movement causing her to blink and tears to fall. She wiped them away as quickly as she could. The fucked up part was that she knew he would agree to whatever she asked of him because that’s just who he was. “I know it would be easier for both of us if I didn’t, but we can’t act like anything is amiss. He’s got eyes everywhere.” She sighed and finally met his eyes. “I’ll stay in my room with the door closed when I’m here. And pack up my things while I’m here.” Ryan steppes forward ever so slightly, wanting to embrace him in some kind of way but thought against it. “I really am sorry that I hurt y’all,” she finally mustered through a broken sob.

Nate

Another sigh and his hand running over his face while he knew she was right. “Fine,” he agreed reluctantly, “but this week changes nothin. I can’t have ya toyin with me, Ryan. I can’t have ya standin here tellin me ya don’t want me anymore, then cos y’all are here for a week and around me and it’s easier that ya change ya mind. If this is what ya want - if ya want out, then ya take it now,” he said being as clear as he could. This week was gonna be hard enough without his emotions being toyed with. He soften a little at the sob from the girl who he’d cared for for so long. “I know ya are,” he said, “I promise, I know.”September 22, 2020

Ryan

"Thank you." There was no reason for Nate to be so generous with her, but she wasn't going to question it. It just meant that it kept her safe from Russell for at least another week. She knew as soon as he found out it would be hunting season again. "I know that I messed up, but I've never been wishy-washy," she snapped back. "I promise this is the decision I'm sticking with." She sighed, her features softening again. "I think I'm going to go back and stay with Jo tonight though, and I'll be back in the morning." She paused and looked back at him. "I'm sorry."

Nate

Nate's wet eyes grew slanted as he heard the girl's voice get harsh. "Y'all ain't really in the position to be barkin' at me, Ryan. You've put me in a crappy position so I'm allowed to have questions and concerns about what's happenin'," he pointed out bluntly. He wanted to mention she also promised to stay with him, but felt like getting into a blow out fight was not going to help the situation. "Alright, if ya say so," he said, basically giving up. He hated this feeling. Part of him felt like he should fight for her, but it was clear by her words and actions that she wasn't willing to fight as well. Which meant this wasn't going to go anywhere if both sides weren't ready to fight. "I know ya are," he said again, "But your sorrys don't mean a whole lot right now."

Ryan

There really wasn't much else to say. She couldn't fault Nate for being mad. It was just unfortunate that her apologies weren't being taken seriously, because she would never apologize to him again. "Yeah, alright." Then without another word, she turned on her heel and walked out of the apartment. She managed to keep it together long enough to get back to Jo's place, where she fell apart in her sister's arms.

#para #p ryan #let her go

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merlinfic · 5 years

Text

announcement: ask box & submit are temporarily closed!!

hey y’all! hope you’re doing well! :D

so we have decided to close the ask and submit once again as we have gotten quite a lot of backlogged asks. i’ll be sure to make a post again letting you all know when everything is back open, which won’t be until we get through all, if not most, of the asks! we’re thankful for your patience!!

now, to address a couple of more things (again):

in future please be sure to use the “submit” box to send us fic recs as opposed to an ask as that way you can send us an actual link to the fic! it’s much easier for us!

please, please do not send us fanmail while the ask and submit boxes are closed! if you do send us a fanmail asking for a fic you can’t find/request fics it will be deleted! sorry!

and that’s about it! in the meantime, the tags and masterlist pages are all up to date and we’ve just added another way to search ao3 (!!!!!!) on the search guide, so be sure to check out all of that!

thanks for all of the support, and have a great day y’all! :D

#mod post #mod danielle #y'all we keep getting closer and closer to getting 100 asks in our inbox

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improvidence318 · 5 years

Text

IT IS TIME

To talk about my survey results!

Remember when I asked y’all to fill out a brief survey about 2 months ago? I was hoping to get enough submissions to equate to about 10% of my follower count. I got 71 people who took the survey (thanks everyone!) which is pretty close to 10% of my follower count when I first posted the survey.

Anyways, on to the results!

This is why I really really appreciate reblogs more than likes. I’ve noticed a direct correlation between reblogs and new followers.

I’m glad that my current content output seems to place me ahead of other audio blogs. I don’t follow any other audio blogs myself, and I’m not really an audiophile, so I have limited knowledge of how others handle their stuff.

Cranking out lots of short content seems to help me stand out. I try to be consistent in my upload rate, or else I run the risk of slacking off and falling behind. Gotta move forward!

Speaking of moving forward...

And of course the only one of these I’ve done so far is Twitch game streams, the least voted-on choice...

If I had more than 1-3 people tuning in, freestyle voice streams could become a thing. I’ll probably send out another survey regarding the best time to do that if I really commit to it.

I’ve had a few people ask if I do fanfiction readings. The answer is “Yes, but unless it’s My Immortal (I do that for free), you gotta commission me to read it.” As a general rule, if what you’re asking me to do is personalized, or would run longer than about 2 minutes, you should probably commission it instead of request it.

As for RP LPs, well, I’m hoping to get something started related to that soon. Stay tuned...

I thought maybe my page could use improvement, but it seems like I’m really the only one that has issues with it.

I appreciate everyone being as honest as possible about this.

A lot of the answers were something along the lines of “your voice acting” or “Daddy Sans gets me hot”. Which seems par for the course around here. I wouldn’t want it any other way. A lot of people, in PMs and in the survey, seem bashful to admit they get turned on by the voices I do. Don’t be! Dangerous and sexy is specifically the kind of voice I’m delivering.

There was also mention that they appreciated the consistency of posts, and how most of them are short and easy to listen to. That’s definitely what I strive for, so hooray, it’s working as intended!

Some people also noted they like the casual, more goofy approach to the voices and how I run things, and I’m glad that has its appeal. IRL I’m much more like UT Sans than MF Sans. The sexy funny is here to stay.

There was also praise for the various other voices I do. I really do try to think of other characters I can do audios for, but 90% of my stuff is still Sans for a number of reasons. I already have his character figured out quite thoroughly, he doesn’t need any heavy sound editing (unlike, say, Optimus), and he’s definitely why people are here in the first place.

Mercifully, the vast majority of responses were “Nothing, you’re good”. There were a few responses I’d like to respond to directly:

If you know any better themes, please please PLEASE PM me and let me know. I’m fine with paying for one if it improves the experience.

I’d love to add a tag index or something, but Tumblr really sucks at page customization. If anyone can offer formatting assistance, I’d be ever so grateful

I know... I have requests from months ago still sitting in my inbox. There are a number of different reasons I haven’t completed your request yet. Could be that I just haven’t figured out a good way to deliver on it. It might be that they’d take longer than normal and I haven’t taken to time to really work on it. On average I get more requests per day (2-5) than what I post per day (1), so a backlog is inevitable.

Audios are tricky to price. When you commission an art piece you usually get charged by the amount of characters, complexity of the background, and the overall detail of the art. Those are easier to standardize than audios. Or maybe it’s because I’m still inexperienced at pricing. Either way, I’ll try to get a commission page up once I get better at it. In the meantime, feel free to PM me and I’ll try to work with you on it. If you have a budget, let me know.

A lot of people suggested I use way more tags, which I have since started doing. Thankfully Xkit has autotaggers that makes it so much easier to keep track of everything.

Some suggested using Twitter, which I already do.

A lot of you recommended being more involved on Youtube, a la ProZD. It’s definitely something I’m considering. Youtube is much easier to share around than Tumblr pages.

Comic dubs were also suggested. I enjoy dubbing comics, but it’s hard for me to find good ones to dub. I’m not nearly as into Undertale and its associated AUs as all of you are, and I don’t really follow UT artists. If you guys find comics you think I could voice, please submit them to me!

About what I expected.

I was a bit surprised that I had a few male followers. This is why I try to keep my audios as gender-neutral as possible.

And that concludes my analysis of the survey results. I really, truly do appreciate everyone who took the time to give their opinions about my blog. I want to improve y’all’s experience and also improve my own output and follower base. My end goal is to get professional voice acting roles, and my work here helps me move forward towards that goal. When I first started this blog, I had no idea how it would develop. I’m so glad I started, and I only wish I’d started sooner.

Love y’all!

#survey #improvidence318

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wonderfulworldofwinchester · 7 years

Text

It was just a dream, right? (Part 1)

Characters: Sam, Dean, mystery woman- might become the reader. (Read the A/N after the text)

Summary: Sam has recurring dreams about a girl he’s never met. Dean says it’s just a dream, but is it? Who is she, and why does she find herself in the middle of Sam’s dreams?

A/N: I am officially back into the swing of things. My computer problem has been fixed so I can write a lot more often and a lot easier now. Feel free to send me any ideas or requests, or just stop by to say hey. I love hearing from y’all!

This was the third time this week Sam had woken up from a dream that involved a mysterious woman. Over the course of the last two months he has been plagued by dreams that all have something to do with her. They weren’t always the same dream either. The part that was the most confusing was that he had no idea who this woman was. He had never seen her before, but he felt as if he should know her.

He made his way into the kitchen, rubbing his face, and trying to shake off the sleep, along with the lingering thought of her. “Mornin’ sunshine.” Dean broke through the thick wall of thought, “sleep well?”

Sam had been contemplating telling Dean about the dreams because he knew how his brother would react. He would tell him that they were just dreams, that he must have seen her somewhere before. Sam couldn't blame him though, he would probably have thought the same thing if it hadn’t been him experiencing it. He decided that maybe Dean could help him figure out who you were, and why you had been in his dreams, he was desperate for answers at this point. “Dean... you ever have a dream about someone youv’e never met? ... and no I don’t mean a porn star.” Dean closed his mouth and thought on it for a second.

“I guess maybe I have. If I have, it was only like once or twice because I don’t remember any to know for sure. Why did you have one last night?” He inquired, eyes narrowing at Sam.

Sam took in a deep breath and made a slightly confused face, “yea, and this is gonna sound weird , but stay with me for a second, okay? I have had these weird dreams the last couple months, it’s not always the same dream, but it’s always the same girl. I have spent countless hours racking my brain, but I swear i’ve never seen her before.”

“oh like happy dreams?” Dean questioned with that smirk and eyebrow raise.

“No. Dean really that’s what you got out of it. Not even like who is she, what happened. No you automatically make it dirty.” The truth was, they were never like that. Not that Sam didn't find himself attracted to her in the dream, or when he thought of her when he was awake. It was more than just sexual attraction though. He was drawn to her for some other unknown reason. “They were just normal dreams, Dean. They weren’t those dreams, they weren’t nightmares. They were just like a normal day. They were different places and events , but she was always there. We always make eye contact but we never get to talk to each other.”

Dean shrugged, “Yea alright that's pretty weird. But dude, our lives revolve around weird. They are just dreams. And with as many places as we’ve been, and as many people we see, you probably have seen her before and you just don’t know it. Your brain probably just internalized it and is creating these things from stuff you’ve seen. She just happens to show up maybe because you found her attractive. I don’t know man. Anyways, got the perfect thing to get it off your mind. Got a case. About 8 hours from here.”

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They pulled up outside an old bar, the place the first vic was found, and were headed to talk to the sheriff on scene. The case had yet to get the mystery woman off of Sam’s mind, but he was hopeful that talking to the locals would help force his mind elsewhere.

Dean just wrapped up his questions with the local PD when Sam practically punched through his arm. “Dean! Dean! That’s her! It’s her! The girl from the dreams!” Sam frantically pointed to where he had seen her, but she was gone before Dean saw her, leaving a very confused Sam, and a worried Dean.

“Sam, are you sure, man. I mean it could have been anyone. You sure your mind isn’t trying to make it her, that is if there was actually a girl standing there. If not you’re seeing things. Either way I’m worried about you man.” He said, punching Sam’s arm in return, as they made their way back to the Impala.

The ride back to the motel was relatively silent. Neither brother bothering to say anything because they both knew it would inevitably lead to another argument. Sam knew what he had seen though. It was just like the dreams. This woman stood a distance away from him, and they locked eyes. It was like clockwork in the dreams. Never the same place, clothes, makeup, or hairstyle, but always the same actions. He would have sworn it was a dream, had he not felt Dean punch his arm before they got in the car. Besides that, this time felt different somehow, he couldn’t explain it. Something felt more real, more intense.

Sam couldn’t leave it alone. He needed to understand what happened, himself, but he also needed Dean to understand that he wasn’t crazy. “Dean, I’m telling you, she was there, and she was the girl from the dreams. She stared at me just like she always does in the dreams. I know I can’t explain how she was there, but then she wasn’t, and I know that from what I’ve told you, it would sound like my mind is trying to fill in the blanks, and make sense of things by putting her there even though she wasn’t. It was her Dean.”

A/N: There will be more to come. I think later on, the girl will take the view of the reader, making this a Sam x Reader. This was the best way for me to write this part though. Let me know whether i should leave the perspective as is, or make it from the reader’s perspective.

As always, I love hearing from you guys! If you have any ideas or requests for imagines or one shots, please feel free to submit them, or you can always just drop in to say hey! Love you guys!

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norfolkrp · 7 years

Photo

YOU’VE BEEN ACCEPTED, WELCOME TO NORFOLK.

Congratulations Ashley, you’ve been accepted to play Mariel Buenaventura! We’re so excited to roleplay with you once again! Go ahead and set up your account, be sure to message the main from it.

Also, be sure to:

Make sure your ask and submit are open.

Follow everyone on the masterlist.

Track the tag norfolk: starter for open dash convos.

And tell us your initial reaction to Norfolk in the tag norfolk: talk!

– Lou & Rosh, Norfolk staff.

Name/Alias: Ashley

Age: 23

Pronouns: She/Her

Timezone: EST

Personal tumblr: ashlaaaywrites

Activity level: ya girl got a life now and has a full time job - weekdays i could be on for a 2-3 hours and weekends i’m available all day if i have no plans so there’s that

Triggers: N/A

What’s the secret password?: REMOVED.

How did you find us?: clearbrook homies since time and i just missed y’all.

What character are you applying for? Original Character ( Shay Mitchell FC )

Anything else?: <3333333 nope

Writing sample:

Please provide us with a brief (ca. 2-3 paragraphs), in-character writing sample.

“Anak, ang iyong tiyuhin ay nangangailangan ng tulong sa tindahan. Did you hear me?…Anak!…Susmaryosep! Who’s there now?” *

Mariel was completely zoned out and just like her mother had predicted, it was because someone was staring intently in her direction. Absentmindedly, she waved the older woman off as a sign to go on without her. “I’ll meet you there…Tell tito I’m sorry! It’s just that this is an emergency…You know I won’t be able to provide quality service if I’m distracted!” The Buenaventura matriarch shook her head in disapproval, but eventually sighed in defeat as she motioned her daughter to go help whoever was summoned.

Looking both ways before she crossed the street, Mariel jogged up to a nearby bench and took a seat next to the deceased. They were female, around the age of sixteen, dressed in a black hoodie, ripped jeans, and a pair of Converse shoes. Using her medical knowledge, there were physical signs of cuts and contusions on her face, as well as a large head wound next to the right side of her temple. She wasn’t the type of medium who’d jump to conclusions and therefore, she decided to start off with an introduction. Offering the young woman a gentle smile, she said, “I’m Mariel and you are?”

Without a word, the being just stared at her, not breaking away from her gaze nor offering a reaction. It was a typical response that she’d received from most and so, Mariel continued on by adding, “I’m a medium and yes, I’m one of the few inhabitants that can see you. Did you want to talk? Or you know sitting in silence is fine too…If you want me to leave, I can also do that. I just want to reassure you that you’re not alone and I could potentially help you pass on if you’re ready and willing to do so…”

Suddenly, she felt her skin go cold as the spirit clutched onto her wrist. Flinching at the touch, Mari wore a concerning expression and waited for her to say something. “Make them stop.” Confused at her request, the older woman raised a brow and shook her head with a puzzled look. “I’m sorry, I don’t comprehend what you mean by that…Stop who exactly?” Once more, she could feel the grip tighten as shivers ran down her spine causing her to sit still, despite the discomfort. She didn’t feel threatened, but she felt like this was a warning of some sort. She needed to know more, since this could be her chance at uncovering some truth to what’s been going on in Norfolk.

“Who are they? Were they the ones who hurt you? Look, I’m going to need to know more than that in order to help you…” The tone in her voice showed evident signs of desperation, but this was crucial information that she needed to collect in order to gain a clearer understanding. A loud bark suddenly caused her to jump in her seat as she snapped her gaze in the direction of a passerby walking their dog. Once she calmed down, she then turned her attention back to the ghost and noticed that she was gone. A frustrated sigh escaped Mariel’s lips as she got up from the bench and ran a hand through her hair. “Damn it.” she muttered to herself, before making the decision to head back to her car. Although she was disappointed with the outcome, she preferred looking on the bright side of things and declared this incident as progress. She made a mental note to revisit the area in hopes that the spirit still lingered on, maybe then she’ll have a better chance at gaining something out of their one on one interaction—but for now, she was going to have to face reality and continue her lengthy search for the truth.

* “Mariel, your uncle needs help in the restaurant…Did you hear me?…Mariel!…My God! Who’s there now?"

2. ORIGINAL CHARACTER

Full name: Mariel Buenaventura

Age: Twenty-Eight

Sexuality: Heterosexual

Species: Psychic

Psychic ability: Mediumship

Occupation: Paramedic at Norfolk Hospital

Address: Edgewater

Quote: “You don’t forget, but you bear it better.”

MBTI: ISFJ

Positive traits (3): diligent, compassionate, loyal

Negative traits (3): spacey, perfectionist, sensitive

Face claim: Shay Mitchell

Biography:

Sumpa. Curse. Regalo. Gift.

The Buenaventuras were known to be a paradox, a family split in two from a long lineage of psychic beings. While half of them see their abilities as a curse and choose to ignore who they were, Angelica Buenaventura grew up in a household that praised themselves for being different. Born in a small town located near one of the many beaches in the Philippines, her family were known as the folks that everyone turned to when religion couldn’t save them now. However, being surrounded by devout religious followers, they were frowned upon for practicing their psychic abilities and using them as a means to make a living. They were accused of ‘playing God’ and greed, but for Angel and her family, they’d do anything to give someone a peace of mind and despite all the skeptics and negativity, that didn’t stop them from doing so.

Although they were able to tolerate it, all good things eventually come to an end and since the prejudice against them worsened, it soon led to the entire demise of their business. Therefore, Angelica’s family took what’s left of their fortune and decided to take a different path by leaving their home land entirely to immigrate to America for a better opportunity and a fresh start. The Buenaventuras ended up in Norfolk, Washington, went through the lengthy process of gaining their citizenships and worked as many service jobs to afford and support their lifestyle. Angelica’s hard work managed to pay off since she worked her way into a business management degree, eventually aiding her family by opening up a small restaurant serving Filipino cuisine and pastries. Things were looking up for them and more importantly, they felt right at home seeing as they were aware of the many other supernatural beings that lived all throughout the town.

It wasn’t until Angelica met Mariel’s father and as a result, she was a product of a one night stand. Initially, Mariel’s grandmother had predicted what kind of man he was the moment he made his presence clear. However, her mother’s stubbornness and pride blinded her from the truth. Although psychics were more in tune with the surrounding world, it’s moments like this where their emotions are capable of clouding their judgement, a side to them that remains humane. Despite the hardships she’d faced, being a single mother was a responsibility Angel was willing to take and overcome, in the end Mariel became her true pride and joy.

Initially, the Buenaventuras weren’t sure if Mariel would inherit their abilities. For starters, her father was human, but it wasn’t until she started walking and talking as a child, that they immediately noticed something different about her. She would actively interact with someone and have long conversations while staying in one place—however in reality, no one was physically there. While some may point out that those were her imaginary friends, her family knew she took part in their lineage and inherited a psychic ability. As she grew older, Mariel didn’t even need to have the talk of what she was or what surrounds Norfolk. She learned to adapt and grew accustom to the supernatural nature that’s around them.

Overall, Mariel’s mediumship came naturally to her, but with many spirits being more involved and present in her midst, it became a struggle to grasp onto once she grew older. For the most part, it also explains her spaced out nature. Sometimes she’d have trouble focusing on the present world since beings from the other side roam in her midst. However, she eventually taught herself to adapt to her abilities and figured out what worked for her. Tuning out spirits soon became easier, especially when she earned their mutual respect. The kind of medium she became was one that was patient and willing to hear and help them out—a habit that the Buenaventuras were known for. Accepting her psychic abilities soon influenced her decision in pursuing a career in emergency services as a paramedic for Norfolk Hospital. Aside from it being overwhelming and emotionally draining, she wouldn’t change it for the world. She wants to make a difference and bring forth peace to the deceased, but in a town like Norfolk where disappearances and unruly deaths tend to happen, Mariel became aware that uncovering the truth may cost her in the long run…And it was a risk she was willing to take.

#ashlaaaywrites #norfolk: accepted

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