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#horrible of a person I am and start hating my guts again… oh someone else has lives in x place/has x job? time to feel gut wrenching—
bestial4ngel · 5 months
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Hate being the burden that everyone just wants to move on and grow up ‼️
my family lives in a 2 bedroom house so my younger sister and mom share a room but like… she’s going into high school soon. And with my friend that was the youngest sibling with the exact same bedroom arrangement as us, she COULDN’T WAIT for her brother to move out, she was counting the days and wishing he’d just get a job and go already.
And now that’s me !! Like fuck I hate being a huge unwanted inconvenience like this, and being too pathetic to get a job or to truly want to move somewhere else. I hate being the thing that is in everyone’s way and making their lives more miserable
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not-goldy · 9 months
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I use to think there was no way Jikook would ever come out. Together or even as individuals. Now I think its looking more and more like they will after MS and the reunion. I am leaning toward Jimin for sure, which is funny, cause I always said Jimin probably wouldn't because he's so OT7 and worries about BTS and he knows it would most likely harm his dad's business and his dad just opened a new place, but I can't see Jimin's dad being super damn selfish and telling him to stay in the closet to protect his business. Maybe to protect him, but not his business. He sees what his son goes through daily. The lies, defamation, slander, accusations. Called a queerbaiter and predator. And not sure how true this is, but this buddy system thing apparently has JK solos trying to research who the guy is standing next to JK, just to get goods on JK in the military and of course Jikook gossip, they are so mad and desperate. Not sure if that is true, but if so, Oh the SK government gonna snatch these MF's bald if they really track down these soldiers families and start harassing them. They don't even realize how fucking horrible that makes JK look. Tkk joining in as well. None of them have respect for JK. it reflects so bad on JK to try and involve other soldiers in their vendetta's and unfortunately for JK there are clout chasing people out there who will give up his privacy. He is gonna be so fucking humiliated and embarrassed if this turns out to be true.
Jimin probably knows at this point he is never gonna be free to live his life with Jk or his members or anyone for that matter, without harassment, unless he speaks his truth, which he's been trying to do for years, without out right saying it. Even if it means leaving korea and going somewhere else. Maybe Japan or even America who knows. Same with JK. I too think he will. In fact, JK has probably already been talked off the ledge by Hybe and Jimin not to out them, when he gets in his fed up moods. You can tell both are increasingly getting more and more frustrated. They even resorted to being private & working in silence, but BAM, when they wanna come out swinging, they damn sure do. The swing and knock fucking heads off. So I think its looking more and more possible that they aren't gonna hide much longer or at the very least make that glass closet even more clearer and stop putting restrictions on themselves after MS. I feel it in my gut. These so called fans are pushing them to their breaking point and its been brewing. Their public, we don't give a fuck about your feelings, private trip to Japan and now enlisting together was just the start. Wait and see if Jikook don't free themselves from this fandom. or I could be wrong and nothing will change, but I kinda think there will be change of some sort.
Jungkook got bad rep for the longest time for being "an asshole" "shitty" "fuckboy" with zero social skills- which time and again he's proven that's not the case. Being introverted don't mean you hate humans.
It's nice he's making friends in there- as he should. That is IF that's his even friend. I expect Jimin has made friends in there also. However Jimin is a private person who isn't going to expose his friendships accidentally. He can be guarded. Also, he's a Libra, he has the gift of foresight to know people would try to use whoever he's close with to get to him in there- like they doing with JK.
It's a shame these people can't live normal lives, smile at someone, stand next to someone, be polite to without all manner of theories being written about them assuming all sort of things about them and the poor stranger.
Jimin is growing, maturing, setting his priorities straight and since 2020 we've seen him gradually choosing his relationship, prioritizing it and making conscious decisions with that in mind.
Personally, I'm happy there aren't at cross purposes anymore and seem to be moving in the same direction in life.
I won't make any predictions for now, just observing and appreciating their bond, it's beautiful to behold as it unfolds. There's not much chaos within their relationship not much turbulence.
I want to see it to the very end. That's why I keep following their journey.
I want to see how they navigate a 7 way dynamic when they come back together as a group with the growth that's taken place in each of them.
Fully coming out is off the table, but they could surprise me who knows. We in uncharted territories here.
If Jikook do come out they will shock the skin off my bones honestly. That said, I'm still rooting for them.
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betweenthings2 · 1 month
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OK HI im sorry for taking years to send this but i lovelovelove the new chapter!!! (and apologies in advance for how Terrible and long this ask is going to be LMFAO)
Matty's not sure how much trying count in the grand scheme of things. Every time he sits down to write, every time he looks at the new headlines for the day, it seems like it gets worse. Someone else died. There's another war going on somewhere. Another group of people are starving. There was another horrific attack somewhere. Someone hates someone for something they can't change. It takes Matty all of about ten minutes to wind up horribly depressed and thirty to give up. When he gives up, he winds up thinking about everything and then he ends up spiraling further.
the way u wrote this is so !!! obsessed. i really like "Someone else died. There's another war going on somewhere. Another group of people are starving. There was another horrific attack somewhere. Someone hates someone for something they can't change." that part! the way u expressed the like. repetitivity? and how everything just SUCKS and somehow it keeps getting worse like omg no i just love how u wrote it!!
Everything ends up being George, really. There's George when they met, George when they started the band, George when he broke his shoulder. There's George deciding not to fill the prescription for painkillers and Matty deciding to go fill the prescription himself, adding what should have been George's prescription to his stash. There's George yelling at him backstage at Latitude. There's George at Matty's bedside after he overdosed, apologizing.
omg the switch in this like. george going from angry to apologising so quickly like neither of them expected it i LOVE omg omg omg. but "Everything ends up being George" is real. same
exasperated and fond.
i have NEVER been able to word that emotion or look or whatever it is and u have just ?!??!?!?! done it in three words ?!??!?!?!??!? this is what i mean when i say ur a god
"I know," George murmurs. "And I'm proud of you."
"Why?"
I LOVE THIS ☹️ george immediately telling him hes proud and his first thought isnt like. thank you. its just "why???????" because he literally cannot see anything positively OH i need this tattooed
That wasn't even a year ago. In hindsight, it's a good thing they didn’t adopt the cat. He'd have just failed the cat, too.
puffball mentioned i hear about it and i awaken like a sleeper agent. anyway. i, again, love love love how u worded this! the snappy sentences with mattys hopelessness it just omg it works SO well, i love !!!!! the fear of failing everybody is making my heart ACHE oh lord i love him
"I don't. I don't deserve anything. I don't deserve you."
im for real gonna burst into tears and die im so. so. SO. obsessed with this. matty no pls u deserve him u deserve love and joy and happiness and a life of no pain PLS ☹️
"You deserve good, Matthew. You deserve someone who adores you and wants you to be happy."
oh the use of his full name he is Extra Truthful. this is a long way of george saying U DESERVE GEORGE BEDFORD DANIEL!!!!! but aaaahh no he's so :((( the way he just knows what to say and mattys still completely lost ooohhhh:((((( love love love
"Who am I when I get home?" Maybe they should have gotten the cat. He could come home to the cat. He could have been a person who has a cat.
im gonna vomit my guts up in some. hellish sadness. willingly. i LOVE this. the way hes gripping at the smallest things like literally just having a cat to let himself know he could be somebody and not just. empty. im actually genuinely obsessed i need this in all the textbooks
"You're Matty. You're always Matty. You're my Matty."
YOURE MY MATTY ☹️☹️☹️ miss betweenthings2 i am politely asking u to stop this madness u are going to kill me (do not stop). hes so:((( im gonna cry i love this i need to be able to give more than one kudos
"I don't know who that is," Matty insists. "I don't know where he belongs."
I DONT KNOW WHERE HE BELONGS i need you to write a book so i can buy at least seven copies of it OH this is so. aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh:(((((( i just love how u manage to convey that . almost manic hopelessness? hes so desperate to be someTHING that hes just got no idea of Anything At All im going to DIE
"She did. She got adopted by a family with two little kids who probably adore her and she's probably happy."
this is going to make me Scream And Cry. 1 puffball lore and 2 AABNDNDNDN ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️ i genuinely am so so so so so obsessed with this u dont get it
The shadows on the wall still take a cat-like shape and Matty can't help but still wish they'd gotten a cat.
☹️ CAT ☹️ as much as i love cats, he is. maybe not the best person to have one. actually no yes he is he can do anything hes like barbie its fine. anyway. i love this so much i CANNOT put it into words like every word on that chapter (and everything else uve posted) id GODSENT its like. beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!! okay enjoy ur day and i hope law school is fun 🧘‍♀️
(also while im here i was 🕸 anon and ive realised i Cannot keep up with being an anon . so apologies for that. ANYWAY okay bye bye for real now !! enjoy life !!!!!!)
Hello!! First of all, never feel like you have to apologize for long asks! I love asks so much and I love know what people think about about what I write!! 💚💚 Also, you're spiderweb anon?!?! Welcome Back! =)
Thank you so much for the compliments!! This first paragraph about the news is simply me projecting onto fictional!Matty, to be entirely honest. I have a love/hate relationship with the news--I like to be informed and know what's going on, but it's all so awful all the time. I also really love repetition as a tool for creating that kind of misery and hopelessness you point out. I'm working on the next chapter and I've been using the exact same pattern.
Fictional!M+G are going to sort things out, but they're not quite there yet. Poor, sad fictional!Matty loves fictional!George so much, but he's also so miserable and he keeps watching the news, which absolutely does not help. Everything comes back to fictional!George for fictional!Matty right now, but he's also so miserable and completely believes that he really doesn't deserve anything good.
Exasperated and fond!! They adore each other, but fictional!Matty is kind of an idiot sometimes. And I appreciate your compliments so much, thank you so much!! You're going to give me a big ego at this rate.
Fictional!Matty is so sure that he's the worst person person ever and sooner or later, fictional!George will realize it and leave. If fictional!Matty can make him leave first, he'll at least be prepared for it. Fictional!George just wants him to be ok.
Puff Ball is back!! Sort of. Puff Ball is back in this chapter because I was l trying to link chapters and create a cohesive, if non-linear, narrative and create emotion. I kept rereading this chapter and thinking it needed something, so fictional!Matty got to be angsty about a cat he doesn't have.
He's so sure he's The Failure of all time. He thinks he's failed fictional!George and his friends and anyone who's ever relied on him or cared about him in anyway, so of course he doesn't deserve anything, let alone someone as wonderful as fictional!George.
Fictional!George is trying so hard. He's angsty and upset when they get off the phone.
This bit about fictional!Matty not knowing who he'll be when he gets home is also me trying to create continuity. The summary on Ao3 is about place, so everything else has to be about place and belonging, so fictional!Matty got to have an identity crisis. He could be a person that has a cat. He's not so sure he should have anything that relies on him, but he could be A Person Who Has A Cat. I'm very touched that you think my work is something to be learned from, but I have to say that I hope I don't see my own work in my textbooks. That would be concerning for me.
He's George's Matty!! It's not getting happier yet. Chapter Four is going to be sad. Chapter Five will be a little bit happier, but Chapter Four will be sad. I'm only a little bit sorry.
Poor fictional!Matty is a little bit suicidal here in a reckless kind of way, the way someone who thinks that have nothing left to lose is. He thinks he has nothing. He doesn't know who he is and he's stuck and so, so desperate to be something and someone and have something, but it all seems so hopeless. (If I ever write a book, I won't shut up about it ever. You can all know my real name and I'll still hope that I don't know any of you in real life.)
Puff Ball!! Fictional!Matty feels very soft and emotional about her and he's not really sure why. He's not really a cat guy but he accidentally let himself get attached.
He just wants something that's his and makes himself feel like he has some kind of value. Fictional!George is trying so hard to get him to understand that he's important no matter what, but fictional!Matty is pretty sure he's wrong.
Thank you so, so much for the ask and the wonderful compliments!! I think Chapter Four will be up in the next few days and it will be angsty and a little bit soft. School is going well--I learned today that in legal fields we like the Oxford comma, which is a win for me.
💚💚
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crossdressingdeath · 3 years
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"Boys will be boys" logic is interesting since WWX himself basically uses that exact excuse in the book when he tells LWJ not to take JC's homophobic rant/assault seriously in the ancestral hall bc that's just how JC is, as if WWX himself wasn't furious when JC targeted LWJ in that scene. A lot of WWX's famed unreliable narration is rationalizing the crazy shit JC does but sometimes people tend to take it at face value.
Yes, exactly! That is such a huge thing. WWX spends so much time telling himself (and through himself the audience) that oh, it can’t be helped when JC mistreats him, JC is just like that, it’s totally fine, he doesn’t mind, and we see how that viewpoint was encouraged and strengthened by the people around him, especially JYL (sorry Shijie but it’s true). Hell, you could argue that this particular aspect of his character was entirely her doing, given YZY just thinks he should be subordinate to JC in all things and JFM mostly ignores JC’s behaviour; it’s just JYL going for the “oh boys will be boys, you’re strong and always smiling, you can take it” angle.
...Actually, let’s go into that a bit more because it very much gets buried under the “best sister” shit; I am prepared to argue that JYL consistently taking JC’s side did serious damage to WWX. Like, she was the only Jiang who consistently showed him affection and support and he convinced himself that it was unconditional! But the “unconditional” aspect was an illusion entirely based on his ability to consistently and convincingly pretend that JC wasn’t hurting him. WWX isn’t stupid, I don’t doubt for a second that he knew JYL would take JC’s side if it came down to it. She always takes JC’s side from day one. Literally; she hears WWX say he’ll take the blame for JC chasing him out of Lotus Pier and getting WWX’s leg broken while all JC did was come out looking for WWX personally (instead of doing the smart and more helpful thing and getting adults to help) because he was scared he’d get in trouble and he got a little scrape because he was running through the woods like an idiot because, again, he was too scared of getting in trouble to GET ACTUAL HELP THAT WASN’T A CHILD and she’s like “Yeah, that sounds reasonable and fair and not like a really, really bad precedent to set with a kid whose safety relies on my family liking him”. ...There’s also an aspect of “Sure, it can’t hurt to let the kid my mother very clearly hates take responsibility for something that he could be punished for by someone with a motive to take everything possible as a wrongdoing on WWX’s part”, but to be fair at this point she doesn’t know YZY will whip WWX for literally anything she can even slightly suggest is any sort of wrongdoing on WWX’s part. And let’s not pretend WWX wasn’t punished for JC getting hurt; come on, it’s YZY, she punishes him for sunbathing.
This is a running thing going forward in their dynamic, too! JC does something horrible, JYL immediately starts in on the “Oh, boys will be boys, A-Cheng might get upset if you call him out on his shit” shtick if WWX shows the slightest trace of dissatisfaction with being treated like garbage, WWX smiles and forgives JC for whatever he did without question, there’s a period of calm, the cycle repeats. JYL very much teaches WWX that he cannot EVER show any unhappiness with JC’s threats and insults. If he ever shows so much as a shred of anger or sadness or generally being upset at the way JC mistreats him JYL takes JC’s side. At most she’ll tell JC that maybe he should back off a little while basically telling WWX to grin and bear it because JC might be slightly upset if anyone ever calls him out on being horrible to literally everyone. And don’t even get me started on the whole “Oh you’re always smiling” bullshit, talk about teaching a mistreated orphan that he has literally no right to look sad about anything ever. Like, let me put it this way: WWX doesn’t even feel he can go to JYL about JC TRYING TO KILL HIM. That’s a lot? It’s a lot? And it never really gets discussed in any way? WWX doesn’t feel like he can tell his supposed sister who supposedly loves him unconditionally that her brother tried to murder him like three times and when the third time comes up JYL takes JC’s side because JC’s arm got broken in the process of the staged fight where JC stabbed WWX in the gut and that’s fine and healthy apparently. Stan WQ, the actual best sister (god I love WQ).
Anyway, now that I’m done enraging the fandom with my tangent about how much JYL sucks as a sister to WWX... Yeah, WWX insists that JC’s attitude can’t be helped because JC’s just like that even when he very clearly doesn’t buy that? He’s obviously pissed when JC goes after LWJ to the point of genuinely going after JC for it... but when they get away from JC he goes into the “Oh, he can’t help it, don’t get mad at him”. And in this particular case part of it is him panicking because JC’s homophobic ranting (and LWJ’s clear anger at it) left him questioning his and LWJ’s feelings and the mutuality thereof, but it also... really does throw every other time he insists JC’s behaviour is fine into question. Like, we know he’s not buying his own line in this scene! He was furious at JC! He’s still furious and upset! But he feels the need to cover for JC. Even after he’s realized that JC’s behaviour wasn’t okay, he still feels like he has to protect him from anyone else getting angry at him. WWX knows JC’s behaviour isn’t okay and that it’s not fair that JC treats him the way he does and I’d argue (especially at this point in the story) that he deserves better than JC’s treatment... but he still insists that JC is just like that and it’s fine.
That throws every single time WWX smiles through JC’s mistreatment into question, I’d say; we know he’ll react this way even when he knows that JC’s behaviour isn’t okay, so who’s to say he ever isn’t aware that JC’s behaviour isn’t okay? In CQL XZ does an excellent job of showing that at least in that continuity he is extremely done with JC’s shit even from when they’re fifteen; the novel is as far as I remember a little less clear, but it’s still pretty obvious that he’s not enjoying the way JC treats him. He knows that the way JC treats him is hurtful and upsetting and sometimes even frightening (think of the times JC threatens him with dogs and he’s clearly scared, which is a whole other thing because either he’s so scared of dogs that even the threat terrifies him or he has zero doubt that JC for sure would set dogs on him, which is a big thing either way and also I’m still not over how CQL JYL laughs when JC threatens WWX with dogs even though WWX is clearly scared and she totally would’ve laughed if that happened in the novel too but showing it so blatantly and then never actually getting into how messed up it is is just unnecessary), but he feels like he has to smile through it and cover for JC, just like when they were nine.
Anyway yeah, for a fandom so obsessed with WWX being an unreliable narrator the MDZS/CQL fandom sure does miss a lot of times where WWX is actually being unreliable, huh.
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ackerpreach · 3 years
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This ending .... I can name 500 reasons and I will name them right now, because I don’t think I’m the only one who is upset with how things turned out. (Also, A positive message for all of you at the end)
MAJOR LEAKS SPOILERS/ READ WITH CAUTION
Update: after reading more theories from fellow RM bloggers, and sleeping over it one day, this entire chapter might be an april fools... Don't fully lose hope yet beautiful people. It's me just giving a review on a possible fake April fools chapter
After following this franchise since 2013, so nearly a DECADE. this ending is a pure disserve to the entire fandom. I feel like Yams has rushed it just for the sake of being done with the entire manga. So many things are left open, characters and their developemt are reverted back all the way to chapter 1 or are left even worse than that...
Mikasa’s worthless character development/ Aaronmika’s horrible toxic codependent relationship 
Oh honey... Let’s start with how horrible Isayama has treated her. We were all rooting for her, because we all felt like she was so misunderstood. She had a horrible childhood and imprinted on a guy who treated her like trash 99 percent of the story. And then, slowly but surely, she starts to realize she has to stop obsessing over him in the uprising arc with the help of a real man who treats her like a queen, more importantly, he treats her like a real human being. This man sees her for her abilities and that she has the power to be self dependent. She learned parts of herself, that she was able to work together with him like no one else could.  She learned parts of herself she was unable to do so if she kept obsessing about Aaron. All this love, care, mutual understanding and RESPECT these two shared. 
but...NAH FUCK THAT, right Yams?? Throw all this development away, all this bonding. Let’s make the main female lead even more yandere than she already was in the first season. Let her make out with his decapacitated head (like dude, this is also pure disrespect to Aaron’s dead body btw) and let her obsess even more about the guy who has treated her no better than a piece of toilet cloth 99 percent of the time. The guy who was never really appreciative in front of her for saving his ass billions of times, who always pushed her away, who yells at her and snaps at her whenever he can instead of reasoning and talking calmly with her in mature way. (EVEN PARODY YOUTUBE CHANNELS WHO DONT SHIP ANYTHING MAKE IT A TROPE WHERE AARON TELLS MIKASA HE HATES HER GUTS WHENEVER HE CAN) 
Then after all that, suddenly Yams tries to last minute persuade us Aaron’s always been head over heels for her???  He should have build their relationship better which he hasn’t even tried to do so... He must be thinking his fans are stupid for eating this from his hands.    
Like seriously??? What is this??? 
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Isayama is just fully contradicting himself. It’s like someone tipped him off with a buttload of money for him to write Aaron like this to satisfy shipping needs and to cash in those extra money’s from it. Even if he tried to cater to Erem*ika, this is not how you write a loving and caring couple which people will root for. 
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This next two panels just freaking infuriates me to the core of my soul. I can’t even describe how dissapointed I am with Mikasa. 
Why is she clutching that head so obsessively like that?  Why is she walking and turning her back away from her comrades? After everything they have done for her, after all they’ve been through?! After everything Armin has done? Standing up for Mikasa, beating up Aaron for hurting her. I feel like even Jean, Connie and Sasha have cared more for her in a healthy way.  Sure, Aaron cares for her romantically too apparently (What a twist Yams :)), but has he aided her to becoming a mentally healthier individual? Has he aided in her mental stability? The answer is a big fat NO!  All I see between these two after today’s raw Chapter’s are too Yandere obsessed individuals who have no clue on how to maintain a healthy relationship. 
Love should only go as far as the heart can endure and it seems like her character is not willing to be aware of that. Even Armin was able to let go of Aaron in those latest panels. Why does her entire character resolve around this guy??? I really do not understand. Her Ackerbond and her age is not an excuse for her to throw her life away like this. 
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Shonen’s disgusting portrayal of women 
I’ve seen this countless of times in the many years I’ve watched anime. SasuS*ku from Naruto, Ichih*me from Bleach, Shinji and that oranged hair girl from Neon Evangelion.. Why do these women get decreased to simpletons with one single goal? And that is to obsess over a bland male lead who either treats them like trash or doesn’t notice them up until the last last chapter (LITERALLY WHAT YAMS HAS DONE). Some go even as far as the male leading wanting the kill the female love interest and yet the female lead is still in love with them???. It’s disgusting for him to write the MAIN female character this way. 
It’s dissapointing we believed in Isayama doing Mikasa’s character right. That she’s finally being able to let go of her codependency and to live for herself maybe live in Hizuru and find more about her roots???, but every single time she shows some improvement, it’s burried deep in the ground again by the Author. It almost seems like a lowkey kink of some of the male Mangaka’s to write about a girl obsessing over them no matter what. I see this so many times to the point that I truly stand behind it that some of them might have this fantasy. 
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I wished he didn’t portray her last panels like this. Everyone else is living their lives while Mikasa is still grieving about him. I’m not saying she’s not allowed to grieve and everyone takes it at their own pace, but cmon... Show her living her life too. This is too much. Her being next to his grave and grieving him as her last panels just shoves it in our faces that YET AGAIN, BEING OBSESSED WITH AARON IS ALL HER CHARACTER STANDS FOR. 
I truly despise how Isayama handles her grieving, kissing his decapacitated head, carrying it around like some handbag, and her last panels being thissss.
The world leaving Paradis alone miraciously after all that??? 
It’s so weird and out of place with so many political feuds and disagreements between the world and Paradis, the entire Rumbling happening and we can see Mikasa just chilling outside in Paradis with no one bothering them. You can see the rings of the walls in the picture below.  I don’t know the exact reason behind as the manga is still in Korean, but from what I see, the story went the route of: throwing a happy ending without enough proper reason and  it was all fixed just like that in a snap! It doesn’t fit the entire narrative of attack on titan for things to be so peacful out of nowhere. When it comes to the narrative, how things work in that world, how hard it is to achieve peace, everything made somewhat sense up until chapter 138. 139 seems so so out of place...  It’s like I’m reading a chapter from a totally different manga. 
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Aaron Yoghurt got defeated so easily/ Aaron’s character assassination
The build up on the first part of the rumbling was great, those kids carrying coins. You could feel humanity’s fear and Aaron’s hatred in those pages. As if he truly had a goal and he has turned away completely from his comrades and his closest friends with no return. The world seemed truly doomed, but he  got defeated just like that. He was in the nape all this time (because screw the warhammer power of hiding yourself elsewhere in his ginormous titan body). There is no master plan as we all expected, and in the end he just acts all yandere in the paths with Armin and that’s it... They massacared his entire character as well. Many fan theories created a better ending with his character. Him being reincarnated as Historia’s baby would be so much better. For him to still keep on seeking and to strive for power. It has always been his motive. It’s his personality from the start until chapter 138. Even if things are okay, to keep on going and to seek that adventure, but then.. He’s so weak and directionless suddenly.. It’s so weird... This is not Aaron at all???
Using Aaron for him this entire post, because I don’t want others to invade our tags... :)))
Historia’s baby 
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The only panel we got from Historia’s child was this. Just a normal kid, normal life... Why did Isayama put so much effort in highlighting Historia’s pregnancy if it was nothing too spectacular anyway? It seemed he had major plans for this kid and for their development too??? It’s again, big plans, big developments, big relationship dynamic, but all  got thrown out of the window... 
Don’t read the next sentence if you are a minor :’) 
It’s like almost ejaculating, but stopping right before it and repeating that every single Arc.
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My energy when writing about this chapter is the same as Nostalgia Critic and his hatred for atla the live action
In Conclusion...
I know us fans should not be deciding on how this story should end, because this is Isayama’s story after all, but I truly wished for him to wrap up things much more rounded. There are so many unanswered questions... Again, I think for the sake of being done with this manga, he rushed all of it. He’s become a millionaire from this story and now his pockets are jammed full, I guess he doesn’t need to put in any effort anymore, right? Perhaps a controversial opinion, but I really wished he cared for his fans a little bit more with this last chapter by giving some answers that make sense at least. It’s his fans who gave him this platform and the opportunity to tell his story and for him to at least give in a bit of effort especially in the last chapter is the least he can do. Rivamika being canon or not, he truly rushed it without thinking much about the entire story line. He expanded it so much, he didn’t know how to bind it all together.
Even after all this, I’ll still ship them in the headcanon type of way. I do give credit to Isayama for giving us a template for such a beautiful dynamic between Levi and Mikasa. He decides to waste it, but that doesn’t mean we have to.  I want to thank all the people with amazing writing skills, the ones who give us beautiful art like @carmenlee @phit chan @vialesana​ and many more. I want to remind all of you that we can create something beautiful of our own and we don’t neccesarily need canon lore for that. The art I’ve seen, the fanfictions I’ve read have touched me deeper than Isayama ever could at times.The Mikasa in our mind is appreciate of Levi, is mature, classy and has a strong will for herself. They spend their remaining days together peacefully. Keep writing, keep drawing, stay creative. 
I love you all so so much, I’ve only been publicly active since March, but thank you Rivamika fandom for giving me so much joy as a lurker these past 7 years <3
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bl--ankhaeji · 3 years
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Bed of Roses
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Pairing~ Emperor!Taeyong x CivilianPharmacist!Reader
Genre~ fluff,, angst,, empireau
Warnings~ smut..like three different scenes,,fem!recieving oral,,handjob,,switch?Tae/Reader,,Talks of war,,mentions/slight descriptions of death,,mentions/descriptions of extreme illness,,Taeyong has PTSD and nightmares,,mentions of blood,,Taeyong has insecurites,,mentions of rotting flesh
A.N~ This is my fic for the taeyong gallery collab hosted by @alreadyblondenow   I am releasing two days later than planned I am sorry for that. This fic is based off of the painting The Kiss by Gustave Klimt. Also big thanks to my mutual/beta reader, Xiami, @kjmsupremacist​ and the mutual who made this beautiful banner for me, Mylin, @suh-insane​ This is my longest fic so far I hope you all enjoy 😊 Oh and before I forget there is a whole like sort of surgery scene in here PSA I am no doctor, I know nothing substantial about medicine or medicinal practices. I got the inspiration for that scene from a drama so...(props if you can guess which one it is)
W. Count~ 12.5k 
The screams of thousands ringing in the air is deafening. Buildings are burning to the ground from a ravenous blaze. A vibrant haze of orange and red covers every single object in sight. No matter where he looks there is someone crying; hell, even the sky seems to be crying tonight. Taeyong’s legs give out from under him, bringing the once-strong prince to his knees as his head drops, hanging lowly in shame. How had he let it get this far? What happened to his beautiful peaceful empire full of its joyous people?
War. That’s what happened. His father had gotten power hungry and bloodthirsty, a terrifying duo. He remembers sitting in the royal meetings listening to the decisions his father would make, hating every single one but not having the authority let alone the guts to stand up to him. Hurried footsteps bring the prince out of his memories as a peasant girl, barefoot and in a tattered dress, appears in front of him.
“Prince Taeyong!” she cries, tears rushing down her face as if trying to see who will beat the other to the ground first. The prince's head snaps up at her cries, looking intently at her face. Her once-beautiful features are now horribly damaged and scarred from what looks like a massive burn. The girl opens her mouth, words making their way out until they stop suddenly and are replaced with a blood-curdling scream. 
It’s then that Taeyong notices the spear cutting through her flesh, beginning to protrude through her midriff before it retrieds back through her body. The girl’s now-limp body falls in a heap in front of the prince, her blood flowing rapidly out of the deep gash. In her place stands an enemy soldier. The soldier raises his sword and the two men quickly commence into a brief battle. Taeyong quickly overtakes the soldier, tearing him down almost effortlessly. 
The tired male stands tall, chest heaving, almost completely covered in blood before he rushes back to the girl, cradling her in his arms, even though his subconscious already knows it’s too late. “M-miss, oh my god miss, p-please please wake up,” he stutters frantically, lightly tapping her face. “MEDIC!! HELP SOMEONE!” he screeches so loudly it feels as if it’s ripping his throat. 
Countless people have died in front of him this whole time. Countless bodies lay around him–men, women, and children alike. Yet he’s hellbent on trying to yell for a medic that he knows isn’t there to help this one girl. Suddenly, he sees the girl's eyes flutter open. “My prince,” her voice barely whispers, her shaking hands reaching up slowly to softly cradle the prince’s tear streaked face. Suddenly the strength returns to her body, her hands, once gentle, now harshly gripping the side’s of Taeyong's face, nails causing what feels like permanent moon shaped indentures on his face. “YOU!” she spits. 
Her eyes, once gentle and kind, tainted with fear, now hold an anger and bloodlust so intense it is almost suffocating. “You’re the reason I’m like this! You and the royal family caused this-this WAR. And for what reason, huh? Thousands of lives lost; all of my friends and family are now dead because of you. I’M EVEN DEAD NOW BECAUSE OF YOU!!” Her hands now tightly grip his neck. “If I have to die by your hands then you have to die by mine. You made this bed of thorns, now lay in it. DIE!” 
“AHHHHHH!” An ear piercing cry leaves the man's lips as he now sits up in his bed scrambling to the headboard as if trying to get away. His clothes and bedding are drenched in sweat. His personal guard, Doyoung, rushes into the room, thinking there was a possible intruder from the emperor's cries. Even though this was far from the first time the emperor was plagued by night terrors, he could never be too certain.
“Your Highness, Your Highness please. Taeyong! Snap out of it; you’ll wake the entire empire, sir please.” Doyoung pleaded with the now sobbing man. “Your Highness, it’s okay it was just a dream, none of it is real.” The guard's large hand lands on the emperor’s back as he rubs soothing circles in hopes of calming the almost hysterical man. 
The dream may not have been real but his pain was, the war was real. His sobs are deafening. 
His people, his country. He failed them; he’s still failing them.
~
The once-cowering man now stands tall with an aura of elegance and power radiating off of him. After Doyoung’s fruitless attempts at trying to talk Taeyong into getting some help for his recurring nightmares, the emperor was due down in Neo City, sometimes referred to as N-City, the capital of the Neo Empire. At least once a month Taeyong comes down from the castle placed in the heart of Neo City and walks around greeting and getting to know the citizens of the city. Taeyong has always been very passionate about knowing the people under him and knowing how they live. He never wants to be an emperor that lets his people suffer while he lives extravagantly in the castle. 
He figures that’s the least he can do after failing them once already. 
He shrugs on his royal cloak even though he and everyone else knows that it’ll come off in no time once he joins the people. Taking a seat in the carriage across from Doyoung, Taeyong is handed his crown.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Fuck fuck fuck. That’s all that you can think of as you race to make it on time. You’re so fucking late; how could you have let it slip your mind? The emperor always comes down around this time and you’re usually always in your spot on time, but you woke up late this morning after pulling an all-nighter preparing medicinal herbs for the elderly people down your street. 
Your rucksack flops lifelessly beside your hip as you finally come to a stop, managing to make it to the spot in the nick of time. You had to deliver the herbs this morning and it almost cost you to miss seeing the emperor. Ever since Taeyong had taken over as emperor and started making his monthly visits, you always made sure you were there to be able to see him. You had a special spot you always occupied. It was the perfect spot where you could see him but not be front and center so that he could see you. 
Indiscernible chatter and yelps of delight grow louder and more constant. The second you turn your head, an unmistakable crown floats atop the heads of an ample number of people. At that same moment you hear the emperor's joyous laugh, the beautiful sound bringing an uncontrollable smile to your lips. The crowd of people slowly thins out, finally allowing you to catch a glimpse of the handsome man, and you can’t help but to be taken aback by his beauty even though this is far from your first time seeing him. The first thing you look at are his eyes. Despite his entire demeanor radiating a bubbly happiness, you can see the truth in his eyes. 
Taking in the appearance of the royalty, you notice the dirty cuffs on his white button up that sit rolled up on his forearms. Ahhh he must’ve been helping Mr. Young plant vegetables again. Your mind conjures an image of the older male who has the gall to make even the emperor plant vegetables for him and  a small chuckle falls from your lips. Making your gaze up to his head, you take in the royal crown. You always wonder how the crown manages to stay rooted on his head despite sitting on it lopsided 90% of the time. A crooked smile that shines brighter than the sun graces the emperor's features and you suddenly feel your cheeks warm like a furnace. 
Too caught up in your trance, you don’t feel the person bump into you until you’re already on the ground. The silence that greets you rings heavy in the air and isn’t broken until you hear a gasp, while at the same time feeling warm, nimble fingers wrap around your arm, gently lifting you from the ground. “Are you okay?” an male voice rumbles, a voice you’re no stranger to, a voice you were just delighted to hear mere seconds ago. 
“I uh I-I ah-h y-y-yes-,” you stutter, struggling to form coherent words once you realize that the emperor has helped you up from the ground. 
The emperor helped you up.
The emperor has his hand wrapped around your arm.
The emperor saw your fall... Dear God THE EMPEROR SAW YOUR FALL!
“I-I uhh YES-yes, I am fine,” you rush out, keeping your head down, refusing to meet the eyes of Emperor Taeyong, terrified of the judgement that might lie in them at your embarrassing fall. You quickly release yourself of his hold, scurrying away before he or anyone else can get a glimpse of your face. With your heart pounding in your ears and tears pricking your eyes you run back to your house as fast as you can manage, cutting your time to see the emperor extremely short. Hey, at least you have more time to prepare; you’re going to make things a little bit different today. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Your Highness.” Doyoung’s curt voice takes Taeyong’s attention away from the retreating back of the girl he just helped off of the ground mere seconds ago. 
“Wha-–ah yes! Let’s keep moving, shall we?”  
The sound of the horses' feet clacking against the stone ground echoes throughout the carriage. “Doyoung,” the emperor starts, looking almost wistfully out of the window. “Do you think that girl from earlier is okay?” 
“I would assume so, seeing as how she had no trouble when running away as if she had just robbed a bakery,” he replied with a slight tilt in his voice.
“She did run away quite enthusiastically, didn’t she?” Taeyong can’t help the small grin that overtook his face at the memory of the girl. It was rather funny seeing her scramble away as if she had just committed a crime. 
“Your Highness, we have arrived.” The coachman speaks from the outside of the carriage as it slows to a stop. 
Despite the limited space, Taeyong stands, shouldering the heavy royal robe. The door to the carriage is opened by one of the royal guards, who proceeds to escort Taeyong to the steps of the palace. A sound of disdain falls from the guards lips and catches Taeyong’s attention. “What seems to be the problem, might I ask?” Halting his steps, Taeyong turns towards the guard and gives him his full attention. 
Realizing the emperor heard him, the guard stiffens, stuttering over his words hurriedly, attempting to make sure the emperor didn’t misunderstand. “Ah—no, Your Highness. There is no problem; not with you, at least, it’s just there’s this girl that always comes to the palace every week, and it’s just really annoying to send her away all the time.” 
Spotting a girl making her way up the palace steps, the guard and Taeyong watch as the girl encounters her first guard, thrusting the huge bouquet into his face then bowing, appearing to say something completely inaudible from this distance. Standing straight, she looks as if she begs the guard for something, a hopeful look etched onto her face only for it to fall after the guard says something in return. Seemingly giving up, the girl turns to leave the palace, only this time she hangs her head down in sorrow. 
Gathering what could be classified as a humongous bouquet, you make your way to the palace, even though you know you’ll probably be sent away again. Having succeeded in finally getting them to at least take the bouquet, you can only hope it reaches the emperor. Usually you just give him a nice bouquet full of roses that grow right in your garden at home with a nice little card attached reminding him to eat and get enough fluids, things like that, but this time after seeing the emperor you know he needs more than just roses. You gathered up and put together a bouquet full of beautiful red roses, gladiolus colored a light pale peach, white poppies, and a bunch of basil sprinkled throughout the bouquet. 
Each flower carries a significant meaning with it that you want to give to the emperor and even if none of your other bouquets got to him, you really wish this one will. Sitting down, you prepare to write the note that you would leave this time. 
It’s me again, Your Highness. I saw you today when you went down to town, and you looked really tired despite the smile you put on your face for us. I do hope you are getting enough sleep while also keeping yourself fed and hydrated, otherwise if you get sick, who will lead us as well as you do? 
As you can see, I gave you a little something different than the usual roses. Considering that you’re a busy person, I’ll assume that you don’t know these flowers or their meanings so allow me to tell you. 
The red flowers are obviously the roses I have been giving you for the last year or so. The pink looking flowers are called Gladiolus and they symbolize strength and get their name from gladiators who fight with strength and honor. The white flowers are called White poppies; they symbolize peace and the remembrance of war. They got that meaning because they are usually the flowers that grow atop fallen soldiers' bodies after war. Finally the little green leaves sprinkled throughout the bouquet are called Basil; although usually used in food, they are also thought to bring peace while warding off negative spirits, symbolizing good wishes, wealth, and a happy home. 
Now that you know their meaning, I hope you can understand why I gifted these to you. Till next time Your Highness. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Closing the folded piece of paper, Taeyong lets out a breath before looking at the beautiful bouquet in his hands. He was surprised that someone took so much notice and cared so greatly about him and his well-being to do something like this. With a light heart and a small flustered grin, he places the card back in the bouquet, setting the flowers in a vase atop the vanity in his room, somewhere where he is sure he will get to see the flowers everyday. 
Back to normal again this week, Your Highness. I do hope that you were able to receive last week's bouquet, but I know there’s a good chance you did not, just like you will not this week. Do not ask why I continue to deliver these bouquets even though I know that you have not gotten a single one. It is too much to explain over a single note. I hope you have eaten well and stayed hydrated throughout this week. I also hope you have been sleeping well. If not, one way I find that helps is lavender oil. You could take it orally or drink some lavender tea before bed. You could even keep lavender in your room to infuse the area with its scent. 
That’s it for this week, Your Highness. Till next time
Closing the note from this week, Taeyong places it back inside of the bouquet, setting it down on his vanity. “Doyoung!” When you delivered today’s bouquet, Taeyong had made specific orders to ensure that it got to him this time. “Could you fetch me some lavender?” 
So after the first time, every week Taeyong couldn’t help but find himself lying in wait anxiously just to get your bouquet and read the sweet little notes you left in them. He had made sure to keep every single letter. His room was so full of roses that he had to start placing them all over the palace, but not without making sure to get the little note always cuddled inside. Not only that, he even started to smell like roses and he couldn’t be happier. He soon found himself relying on the little notes left in the bouquets’ to get himself through the week. Even if it was the simplest message just telling him to make sure to eat, drink, and sleep properly it still means the world to him.
 He would get so excited for the bouquets that he had even started to make his way down to the palace entrance when he knew you were coming. Doyoung would compare it to a dog waiting on their owner to get home. He swore one of these days he was going to stop being a scaredy cat and go out and accept the bouquet himself, but until that day came he would remain behind the palace doors. 
The resounding gong of the grandfather clock echoed throughout the room, alerting Taeyong of the new hour. It’s not like he didn’t already know, though. “It’s 4 o’clock, I have thirty minutes till my roses come.” Signing the last of the documents, stacking them on top of his desk, Taeyong stands, stretching his lithe body in order to get rid of the stiffness in his joints. Walking around his desk, Taeyong makes his way through the door.
A monotone voice laced with sarcasm breaks the silence, scaring Taeyong. “I guess it’s time for your one-sided weekly date. Or is it one-sided since one brings gifts while the other just watches like a creepy stalker?” Doyoung questions, leaning against the wall next to the entrance whilst raising his eyebrow.
“N-no! I mean, yes, it is close to time for the delivery, but it’s not a date.” A light blush covers Taeyong’s cheeks as the word ‘date’ falls from his lips. “I was just leaving to go around the palace and see how everything is going, checking and making sure things are happening the way they should–y’know, kingly duties.”
Turning to face the obviously flustered king, Doyoung gives him a deadpan expression that screams mmhm sure. “All I got from that was that you admit to being a creepy stalker.” Taeyong’s mouth flies open, unable to give a coherent response. “Oops, look at the time! You should probably start making your rounds,” he says, walking out of the room, the sound of Taeyong’s incoherent ramblings drowning out as he walks away. 
Sobering up from his conversation with Doyoung, he makes his rounds around the castle, steadily making his way to the entrance, keeping his eyes on the time. By the time he makes it to the entrance, he can see the girl making her way up the palace stairs, still a little dot in the distance. He can’t help but notice the way his hands begin to feel clammy and his heart rate slowly picking up as your face comes into view. 
He remembers the first time he came down and was finally able to see your face clearly. He swears it was as if the world stopped. You looked more beautiful than any bouquet he has received from you. He was so flustered that he couldn’t help but to blush every time he thought of you. He knows because Doyoung wouldn’t shut up about the magenta red that spread along his cheeks at random times that day. 
He was so focused on looking at you that he didn’t realize the rushed way in which you gave the guard the bouquet. All he knew was that one second he was staring at your face and the next your back as you lightly jogged away. Slight disappointment settles in his stomach as he realizes you didn’t even attempt to convince the guard to give the bouquet to him this time. 
The guard walks over, handing the bouquet to the waiting king, not wanting to be gone from her post too long; she quickly turns around, moving to head back before the voice of the emperor stops her. “Wait!” Taeyong notices the tension in her body at the sound of his voice, “Yes, your highness?” she asks, voice shaking slightly. 
“Where is the note?” 
Turning back around, she faces the emperor. “What note, sir?” 
“The note. The one that’s always in her bouquets.” Taeyong notices his voice came out sharper than he intended when he sees the guard flinch slightly. “I apologize; I didn't mean for that to come out so harshly. I just—there’s always a note that comes with her bouquets and-and there’s not one in here.”
“Ah, I don’t believe there was one in there, Your Highness. At least, I didn’t see one when she handed it to me.” Upon seeing the crestfallen look that sits on the emperor's face, the guard instantly offers to check and see if it had fallen off somewhere. 
Not wanting to get his hopes up, Taeyong replies, “No you’re fine–it’s fine if you didn’t see it when she handed it to you then it must not have been there in the first place.” Taeyong can hear how disheartened his voice was. Deciding it’s time to go inside, he sends the guard off to go do what they were doing beforehand.
“Hey Tae, how was the–What’s wrong?” Doyoung instantly notices the somber expression placed upon the emperor’s face. “You usually are about ready to jump off of the walls and now you look like the baker just ran out of those sweet potato cubes you get when we go into town.”
“It’s nothing.”
Grabbing Taeyong’s shoulder, Doyoung turns him around so they’re face to face, “That girl didn’t say anything mean in that note she leaves in the bouquets did she? Cause if she did, so help me god- no so help her I will-.”
“Calm down, she didn’t say anything mean. She didn’t say anything at all. There was no note in the bouquet this time.” 
“Oh. Uhh well, at least she still delivered the roses. Maybe something happened and she didn’t have time to write the letter,” Doyoung tries to reason, hoping he would be able to say something that would lift his friend’s spirit. Taeyong could tell Doyoung was trying his best to be supportive but there is nothing he could say right now that could make him feel any better.
“Y-yeah, maybe.” Not wanting to think about it anymore, Taeyong leaves for his room with a wave. At least he finished all of his paperwork for the day and he can just lay in bed.  
Taeyong finds himself walking through a field filled with flowers without an end in sight. It’s not until he sees the outline of a person sitting in the field that he starts to speed up, hoping he could ask the stranger where he was at. 
As he gets closer, the person begins to seem more and more familiar. It has him thinking, trying to figure out who it could be. As if the person hears him they turn around and he’s surprised to see you sitting in the field. 
“Hello Taeyong.” 
“Ahh hi.” Taeyong can feel his heart rate pick up almost as if it’s trying to jump out of his chest.
“Would you like to sit with me? The bloom is absolutely beautiful today.” Replying with a stiff nod, the usually confident emperor shyly takes a seat in the field of white flowers. Giving the seemingly flustered male a soft smile you pluck one of the flowers out of the field, lifting it up to your nose smelling the fragrant plant. 
“Smells heavenly. Would you like to take a sniff?” you ask, taking the flower away from under your nose, handing it to the male opposite you. 
Taeyong takes the small white flower out of your hand, lifting it to take a whiff. He immediately recoils as the putrid smell of rotting flesh infiltrates his senses, “Wha-” You snatch the flower away from his hand taking another whiff. 
“Smells great, doesn’t it? I love the smell of white poppies.” It’s then that Taeyong’s mind remembers the white flowers that were in the first bouquet that he received from you as well as the meaning of the flowers. Finally taking in his surroundings, Taeyong realises that it’s not just a field of flowers but a field of dead bodies. 
“Y’know Taeyong, I used to be sad thinking that I was going to have to go forever without ever getting to see these gorgeous flowers. But because of you and the war your family started, all of these dead bodies were able to sit here and grow some of the most beautiful flowers I have ever seen.” By now you have picked up a whole bouquet worth of the poppies, little pieces of rotted flesh hanging off of the bottoms, “Too bad I had to die before I got to see them.” 
After hearing her last sentence Taeyong takes a good look at the girl, noticing that the white poppies she had collected were all from her body. “Y’know maybe you should die too so you can fully witness the beauty of these flowers,” you say with a slight tilt to not only your voice but your head. 
Before he can question it you’re already driving a spear through Taeyong’s heart. 
~
“Taeyong you look like absolute shit. Do you really think you should be going into town like that?” The bags under Taeyong’s eyes look bigger and heavier than the robe on his shoulders. It has been a week since you dropped off the bouquet without a note.  
“Yes, Doyoung. It’s been a month, we don’t want people to worry.” 
“Funny. You say you don’t want them to worry but you look like the living dead. They’ll worry either way.” The guard rebutts, crossing his arms sassily.
“Doie, I don’t have the time nor the energy to argue with you, just please can we go?” 
“That’s just it. You always have time and energy to argue with me! Taeyong, it’s been a week; it was just one note out of hundreds. Who knows; maybe she just forgot to put it in the bouquet, but regardless of what happened you can't keep moping around and carrying yourself like this. You’re an emperor, for pete’s sake! What will you do when she stops bringing the bouquets?”
Taeyong freezes. What will he do? He can't expect you to deliver bouquets forever, can he? At some point you’ll get tired of it, tired of him, and what will he do then? Standing straight, Taeyong makes his way out of the palace, head held impossibly high. 
“I- dammit Taeyong I didn’t mean it like-”
“No. You’re right, I can’t expect her to always bring the bouquets, that's selfish of me.” I can't always expect her to be here. It's selfish to expect her to be here. “Come on, we have people to see,” he says, climbing inside of the carriage.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Finally done unpacking your clothes from the last minute trip you had to take last week, you plop onto your bed, completely beat. One of the families you delivered medicine to ran out suddenly and you had to rush to their house so that their child did not die. You spent the rest of the week nursing the child back to health after they had to go without medicine.  
The thing is, you got the message in the middle of making the emperor’s bouquet for that week and you didn’t have the time to make a note to put in the bouquet. Even though you know that the emperor doesn’t receive the bouquets at all, you still felt the guilt sitting in the pit of your stomach that entire week. 
You don’t realize you’ve fallen asleep until you’re woken by a series of rushed knocks on your pharmacy door. Getting out of bed reluctantly, you grab your apron, tying it around your waist and walking to the door in order to go see who it is. 
“Chamomile Pharmacy, how may I–” you start opening the door until you get sight of the person on the other side and quickly slam the door back in place. Why was Emperor Taeyong at your door?!? And why did you just slam the door in his face? Reopening the door, you start bowing and apologizing to the seemingly starstruck emperor at once. “I-I am so sorry Your Highness, I didn’t mean to do that, it’s just you caught me by surprise. I wasn’t expecting it to be you behind the door,” you hurriedly attempt to explain until Taeyong is knocked out of the way by his royal guard Doyoung. 
“We don’t have time for this right now. You can have your little–whatever this is later. We need you to make more of this medicine for Mr. Young immediately. We showed up at his house right as he passed out and this was on his counter!”        
Grabbing the bottle, you realize this is the heart elixir you made him some time ago, “Shit! Okay I’ll be right back. I need to go grab something out of the garden first,” You quickly tell the men, writing at the speed of light on a piece of paper. “Here, while I’m getting that I need you two to look and find these in that cabinet over there. I need everything ready for when I get back so I can quickly get this to him.” 
Rushing out into the garden, you quickly sort through various plants until you find the two you’re looking for. You barge back into the pharmacy to see that Doyoung and the emperor got a little over half of the ingredients down. “Okay, even though everything isn’t down yet I’m going to go ahead and get started. One of you, continue to look for everything while the other comes over here and gives me a hand. We have to hurry.” You are so focused on getting the medicine done that you don’t even notice Taeyong handing you the supplies. 
Finishing up the elixir and gathering all of the utensils, you stuff them into your rucksack and run out of the door. “We rode horses over here, it’s faster than on foot. Hop on Taeyong’s; we have to go,” Doyoung all but commands as he mounts his horse, already taking off. The adrenaline pumping through your system helps to keep you calm about the fact that you now have your arms wrapped around Taeyong’s waist and are currently on a horse with him. 
In no time you’re riding up to Mr. Young's homely brick house, the one that he and his late wife built back when they were younger. Pushing your way into the house, you see the old man lying on a cot on the floor. Taking everything out, you lie it on a towel next to you on the floor and pull on a pair of gloves. 
Quickly checking the old man's pulse, you let out a breath in relief that it’s still there but very faint. You take a pair of medical scissors and cut his shirt open. Grabbing the bottle containing the green elixir and a needle syringe you urgently but carefully extract some of the liquid from the bottle. At this point the silence in the room is deafening, but you’re only able to hear the white noise buzzing in your ears, blocking out any and all distractions. 
You check and make sure that it’s the right amount before giving the syringe a slight squeeze, pushing a few drops of the liquid out of the needle. Taking a deep breath, you harshly stab the needle into the man’s chest, forcing the liquid through the needle, unknowingly garnering stiff gasps from those who are watching. You immediately retract the syringe only to place your hand on the same spot, firmly yet softly massaging it. 
After massaging for a couple of minutes you sit back, bated breaths falling from your lips. “You can take him to his room now, he needs to rest. I’ll go make some tea for everyone.” Gathering your supplies, you take them to the kitchen to disinfect and sterilize them. Behind the doors of the kitchen you finally feel yourself calm down and it’s then that you notice the intense way in which your hands are shaking.   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Everything was going fine, and he was almost done making his rounds with everyone. One of the last people he had to meet with was Mr. Young, the sweet old man who always made him help pick things out of his garden, and that’s when the day took a turn. Was it for the worse? Taeyong didn’t know yet. Walking in on the man passed out on the floor shook Taeyong to his core. When he and Doyoung finally noticed the empty bottle on the countertop, they read the label which stated the pharmacy where the medicine was from. 
From there, they took two of the guard’s horses and were off to find the pharmacy. It’s there that Taeyong found you, though the circumstances were less than great. He still couldn’t believe you were right there in front of him, but the moment was over after Doyoung realized what was happening. Now that everything had calmed down and Mr. Young was okay, the fact that you were just a few steps away in the kitchen was eating at the emperor. 
“I don’t get why you just don’t go in there and talk to her.” Doyoung spoke suddenly, sounding bored with his life after noticing the way in which the king fidgeted in his chair, eyes constantly flitting to look back and forth from the kitchen door to his feet. 
“I mean, it’s not like she can do anything; you’re an emperor for god’s sake. Unless you want to continue being a creepy stalker, I suggest you go in there and tell her that you’ve been receiving her bouquets and you like them or some shit like that.” 
“I-I can’t just barge in there and–”
“He only had jasmine tea in his cabinets, so I hope there’s nothing wrong with that,” you say, walking into the living room with a tray of tea-filled cups in your hands. 
“Jasmine is fine,” Doyoung replied, simultaneously leaning down to pick up his cup. Taeyong suddenly couldn’t speak as you looked at him expectantly, wanting to make sure he was okay with jasmine tea. All he could do was look up at your glowing face with eyes that might as well be in the shape of hearts. “Ah jasmine is good for him as well. Forgive my liege, he's still a little shaken up from the situation.” 
With a soft nod you turn around, moving to make your way back into the kitchen. It was then that Taeyong’s mouth and mind decided to move as one. “Wait! Where are you going?”  
“Oh, uhm, I was going back to the kitchen. I figured you two would want to be alone,” you say, almost cradling the board to your body, gesturing awkwardly towards the door. 
“You don’t have to.  Why don’t you sit in here, with us?” 
“I mean, if you’re fine with that.”
“I’m fine, I’m more than fine.” The words were out of Taeyong’s mouth before he could even process them fully. You move to sit on the other side of the loveseat beside Taeyong. 
The sound of purposeful slurping provided by Doyoung barely sufficed at cutting the tension in the room. “I just remembered, we never seemed to have gotten your name?” Doyoung asked, ending the silence that layered the house. 
Quickly swallowing the tea in your mouth, you reply “Oh, I’m sorry, how rude of me, my name is Y/n. I’m the owner of Chamomile Pharmacy.” You add a bright smile at the end.
“Owner, huh? You must really like medicine.”  
“Hmm, I guess you could say that, but not really. I mainly just like flowers, and growing up I realized all the medicinal benefits they hold, so I figured why not make money and spend my life surrounded by what I love?” You sit back in the seat, seemingly comfortable now that you’re talking about a passion. “I get to help people while surrounded by plants all day; it’s a win-win.” 
“Mmhm, that sounds lovely. Oh, Taeyong.” The king’s head practically snaps up at the mention of his name. Spotting the mischievous look in his best friend's eyes, his stomach practically dropped to the floor. “You love flowers as well, specifically roses. Don’t you, Your Highness?” 
“I–”
“Yeah, I distinctly remember your love for roses starting after receiving a bouquet full of them every week.” Doyoung had no idea that this was the flower girl at first, but Taeyong could tell by the way he had been acting ever since you came around that he had come to piece it together–especially after you blatantly declared your love for flowers just a few mere seconds ago. 
At his words, your mouth fell open in pure unadulterated shock. The emperor had been receiving your bouquets?! And he liked them? You had no idea how to feel with all of the mixed emotions flowing through you. 
Wide eyed, you ask, “You’ve been receiving my bouquets, Your Highness?” 
Taeyong is flustered when he replies, “Y-Yes I have, they are very… nice. Thank you for them.”
“He really likes the little love notes you put in them,” Doyoung adds, deliberately putting the word love in front of notes. At his words, Taeyong throws the harshest glare he could at the other man, wishing he could strangle him with his eyes alone. 
While Taeyong was glaring daggers at the knight, you couldn’t help but feel sheepish. You thought you were giving those flowers away for nothing, only to realize that the emperor had been getting them and he liked them. Then you remembered that you had forgotten the note in your last one. 
“Ah, I just remembered that I forgot to put a note in the last one.” You speak bashfully, lowering your head. “Well, I didn’t forget, per say, I just didn’t have the time–an emergency came up while I was making it and I had to hurry. I didn’t think it would matter that much since you weren’t getting them, but now I know you were, so I feel bad.”
“No, it’s okay, I understand. There’s no need for you to feel bad, things happen.” Taeyong finally speaks, not liking the obvious way in which you blame yourself. Standing up, he motions to a door, stating that he has to use the restroom.
The room sits silent at Taeyong’s absence. You still feel guilty, but before you can think too hard about it, Doyoung shocks you out of your thoughts with a  question, “Y/n, why do you always give roses?”
“Hm? Oh, why roses? Well that's easy, because he’s The Rose Emperor .” Doyoung lifts an eyebrow in question. “Ah, I forgot that I’m the only one who calls him that,” you explain quickly. “Well, one of the reasons is because he has this beautiful rose-shaped scar right under his right eye. And I mean, he’s like a rose. Pretty and elegant and practically harmless to the unsuspecting eye, but he has thorns, which he uses to keep people away, thorns he uses to hide things from everyone, even those closest…”You trail off for a moment, thinking. “Hmm, if you think about it that way, wouldn’t that mean we're all like roses?” You speak nonchalantly, looking somewhat deeply into your cup of tea. “So that would make this world a bed of roses, wouldn’t it?” 
Standing but a few feet away, hiding behind a wall, the man in question couldn’t help but overhear. The way you talked and the words you used to describe him made his heart pound. You sounded so sweet and genuine, and he couldn’t help but believe every word you said. His hand uncontrollably caresses the scar you mentioned. He never noticed that it looked like a rose. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Doyoung, I need to borrow some of your clothes.” Busting into the guard’s room, the emperor pants quickly, garnering the man’s attention. 
“Wha–for what?”
“No questions, I just need them,” the young ruler says, walking into the man's wardrobe. “Oh and if you have a hat and mask, I’m going to take those, too.”
Taeyong’s presence in the shop is known as soon as he walks through the door, a bell ringing upon contact. Hurriedly pretending to scan the shelves as if searching extremely hard for something, Taeyong hears you enter the room through the back door moments later. 
“Sorry for not greeting you as soon as you came in. I was doing a little gardening in the back. Is there anything I can help you with today?” you ask, simultaneously washing the slight dirt off of your hands at the sink.
Knowing it would be rude to not acknowledge you, Taeyong turns to face you, self-consciously tugging on the mask resting on his face, not knowing if he wants you to know it’s him or not. You walk over after drying your hands, ready to help the customer, finally getting a good look at the man’s mask-covered face. You freeze in your spot, not knowing if you are just delusional or if Emperor Taeyong is actually standing in the middle of your pharmacy. 
“Uhh Your Highness..?” you question slowly, giving the stranger room to deny if needed. 
“I–uhmm yes,” Taeyong stutters, taking the mask off of his face, revealing his apparently not-so-secret identity. Despite breathing just fine a few seconds ago, Taeyong seems to not be able to when you give him a dazzling smile. You ask him why he’s here and if he needs anything. “Yes, I’m here because I, uhh, need something to help with… headaches! Yes, I get headaches, y’know, from reading papers all day.”
“I have just the thing to help with that! I get headaches myself, and I find that the plant Feverfew helps a good bit. The plant itself can be a little strong and could cause irritation to the mouth if chewed, so I just grind it up and make a nice little diluted concoction with it, and it does wonders,” you say, grabbing the bottle containing the liquid, placing it on the counter, and making your way to the other side so you could bag the medicine.
“I must warn you, though–it can have very light side effects that can cause nausea, digestive problems, and bloating.” Finishing up you place the now bagged medicine on the counter sliding it over to Taeyong. 
“Ah, how much do I owe?” 
“Nonsense, you’re good, consider it the Monarch's discount.” Thanking you, the emperor grabs the bag, making his way out the door, “Bye, come again.” 
After the first time, Taeyong continued to visit the store, each time for a different reason. He stayed a little longer each time he visited, finding himself wanting to indulge in your presence more and more. Even when you would go to the palace to deliver your weekly bouquets he would come out now just to start a conversation with you. You both would end up just sitting on the palace steps talking for hours on end. 
Now was one of the times when you would sit outside the palace talking with the king.  
“Your Highness, word was just sent in from the WayV kingdom, and there are forms to be signed urgently.” Doyoung addressed the young emperor, throwing an apologetic look at you for ruining your time together. 
A breath falls past your lips as you push yourself up. “Oh well, I guess that’s my cue to leave. See you later, Your High-” 
“Wait. Why don’t you come inside with me? This shouldn’t take too long.” 
You and Doyoung gape at the emperor, both in shock. Wanting to hurry and get things settled, Taeyong passes both of your almost statuesque bodies. Doyoung offers to show you around while Taeyong does his work but the emperor quickly refuses. “I’ll do it when I finish.”
Grabbing your wrist, Taeyong all but drags you to his office. There are so many twists and turns that you have no idea how Taeyong didn’t get lost. “You can sit over there on the couch in the foyer. I have some books on the shelf over there you can read if you want. I'll be right here behind this desk.”  
Taking in the extravagant office, you can’t help but notice how roses cover almost every single open surface possible. He really did keep every rose he got from you. Just that thought alone makes your heart pound so hard that you can hear it beating in your ears. Deciding you should do something before you look weird, you walk over to the shelf, surveying the books available to you. 
You pick a book that looks good enough and sit down on the couch.You try to focus on the words in front of you, but the room is warm, and the couch is comfortable, and your eyelids begin to feel heavy. You didn’t realize you fell asleep until you felt Taeyong gently shaking you awake. The sun had started to set, casting a beautiful warm golden glow around the room. 
 Taeyong sat beside you on the couch, still grasping your shoulder as you both stared intensely at each other. You felt yourself slowly leaning towards the beautiful man, almost as if you were in a trance. Taeyong couldn’t help but take in every gorgeous feature on your face as it was surrounded by a golden halo.
Moving his hands from your shoulder to the nape of your neck he pulls you in, no longer able to hide the attraction he has for you. Your lips mingled in a dance only privy to them. Leaving the one on your neck the other moves to the side of your face, Taeyong positions you just how he wants and you couldn’t help but to give in to him.  
It was as if his entire being consumed you and you had no choice but to follow his lead. Removing his mouth from yours he steadily transitions his lips lower splaying damp kisses all around your jugular. “Y-your highness, m-maybe we should stop.”
“Call me Taeyong darling and I don’t want to stop if you don’t.” he says, eyes flitting up to look at yours. “Do you want to stop?”
Feeling a fire burning in your stomach setting your lower regions ablaze, you know you can’t give him anything but the truth, “No, I don’t want to stop Taeyong.” Taeyong’s satisfied hum rumbles against your collarbone, “That’s my girl.” 
His lips find their way back to yours, an involuntary moan falling from yours as Taeyong pushes his tongue inside your mouth. He takes his time exploring your mouth as if he wanted to get acquainted with every nook and cranny. When he took his lips away this time it was as if he took your soul right with him. A small discontent whine leaves your mouth causing the male to coo, “Aww look at my precious rose, so needy already.”
He plants a small peck on your lips pushing you to lay back on the couch, “May I remove your pants darling?” Giving him a small head nod he starts to lower himself down to your now wet core. Your underwear comes off right along with your pants and the slightly cool air hitting your hot core feels almost heavenly. 
Lifting your legs on top of his shoulders Taeyong plants soft kisses along your pelvic region finally deciding to stop teasing he licks a long slow stripe up your wet pussy making sure to give a little more pressure right onto your clit. 
Taeyong’s hands move to sit in the crevice of your pelvis, tightening his grip simultaneously bringing you closer to his mouth as he proceeds to contort his tongue between your soft lips as a pianist moves their fingers across the keys aiming to hit the right notes to make you sing.
Your voice cracks almost violently as endless moans drip from your lips like sap out a tree. Eyes sealed shut you can’t help but to see stars as Taeyong makes you feel like you’re on top of the world. His soft hair rests between your fingers latching onto the strands for dear life as you attempt to somehow ground yourself. 
If he wasn’t holding you down you know for a fact that you would be humping his face akin to a dog in heat. “Fuck.” he moans between your legs sending vibrations all the way down your body. Suckling your lips between his as he looks up at your face scrunched in pleasure, “Open your eyes baby, look at me.” 
You should not have had as much trouble as you did opening your eyes but after a few seconds you finally were able to do so. “I want you to focus on me baby, watch me eat this succulent pussy of yours until you cum.” One of his hands moves, transitioning to start rubbing your clit applying ample pressure. 
His tongue starts to prod at the opening to the place in which you seemed to want him the most right now. The combination of his mouth and hands was too much and you felt your legs start shaking as you alerted Taeyong of your oncoming orgasm. “That’s it baby, cum for me. I want to see it.” 
You didn’t even know your voice could go as high as it did in that moment. Your labored breaths were halted as Taeyong pressed his wet lips to yours causing you to taste yourself on his lips. “You still up for that tour?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Your Highness, there have been reports of an outbreak of some sorts. For right now it’s small but we have no idea what it is or where it came from.” Doyoung says, ending his report on current events. 
“Okay, since this is something we have no prior dealings with we need to tread carefully. Get everyone who might be infected and make sure they’re getting proper care. Talk to them, see what their symptoms are and ask what they were doing before they got sick. Maybe we can try and piece together how you contract it.”  
“Should we alert the public, Your Highness?” 
“No, not for now at least. This is still manageable. We don't want to scare everyone for no reason.” Finishing up his duties, Taeyong starts to head to your house. 
You had yet to talk to Taeyong about what happened that day despite having seen each other multiple times since then. Not like you regretted it or anything you just felt bad about Taeyong servicing you and you not being able to return the favor. You were interrupted in the middle of your naughty thoughts when you heard soft knocks ring against the door not to the pharmacy but to your house placed on the side of the pharmacy. 
Answering the door you only expected to see one person on the other side of the door. “Hi Taeyong.” you breathe softly gazing at the male opposite you. 
“Hello my rose.” placing a kiss on his lips you let him enter the room. Taeyong pulls two books out from his bag and you hurriedly rush over to where Taeyong sits on your bed grabbing your book as Taeyong pulls you onto his lap. Reading for a while your mind can’t help but to go back to what happened. 
Taeyong can feel the air in the room change as you squirm on his lap. “Sweetie, what’s wrong?” 
“Uhh nothing Yongie.” 
Grabbing a hold of your waist Taeyong lowers his head to your ear, “It doesn’t feel like nothing darling.” His warm breath hits your ears as he slowly lets his tongue dart out and lick a stripe up the shell of your ear. 
“I- just want to pleasure you as well. Last time you only focused on me and I want to return the favor.” you speak turning around in the male’s lap legs wrapping around his waist. You bring the male into a feverous/feverish? Kiss. You hear his breath hitch as you slowly grind down onto his semi hard dick, and you feel the grip he has on your waist tighten. 
Moving yourself to Taeyong’s thigh instead of his entire lap. You maneuver his pants off leaving his boxers on. You slip your hand between your bodies reaching for Taeyong’s boxer clad cock. Lightly squeezing while massaging his length you lean forward gingerly planting kisses along his neck swirling your tongue on each spot you kiss. 
“Shit Y/n.”
“You want me to take it out, Yongie? Do you want me to wrap my hands around your hard dick and rub you till you cum all over my hands.” you tease applying more pressure to his hard appendage, “Hmm maybe I’ll even let you watch me lick your cum off of my hands.” 
“Oh Fuck yes.” 
“That doesn’t sound like begging to me baby.” 
“Hmm please baby, please take it out and make me cum.”
You grin, squeezing his now fully hard cock harder, “Well since you asked so nicely.”  Your hand moves to the band of his boxers removing the clothing. His erect penis pops up, slapping the male’s clothed abdomen after finally being released.
You let a few drops of spit fall onto the palm of your hand before giving Taeyong what he wants, gripping him. You slowly start to work your hand up and down his stiff cock fluctuating the strength you use to grip it.
“How does that feel Tae? Are you enjoying yourself sweetheart?” you whisper in his ear speeding up your ministrations. A broken moan falls from the semi pouted lips of the emperor. The feel of your hand gripping his cock felt like heaven he could barely think. 
The slick sound of your hand going up and down his dick was all that could be heard throughout the room. Taking your other hand you begin to not only stroke his length but also fondle his balls. “Ah, Y/n I’m not going to last much longer please make me cum.” Wanting to give him what he wanted you run the pad of your thumb along the underside of him and slowly massage the bundle of nerves just under the head. 
As soon as you do, a whimper leaves Taeyong’s lips as his head falls forward resting on your shoulder. His mouth starts sucking on any pieces of exposed skin he can find and you feel him mumble against your shoulder, “I’m cumming.” His warm release falls onto your hands covering them as you try to squeeze out every last drop. Raising your hand to your mouth you lick some of the cum off of your hand tasting him. 
“Fuck sweetie you’re gonna be the death of me.”
“Taeyong. It’s gotten worse. The illness has started spreading; our attempt at keeping it contained was a failure. While it did slow the spread, it did nothing to stop it.”
Slamming his hand on the desk Taeyong couldn’t help but to curse, “Fuck! Did you at least figure out how it’s contracted and its symptoms?” 
“Yes, after questioning the patients it became pretty clear that it wasn’t contracted in any specific way. Almost all have reports of having been in public settings surrounded by a lot of people and said a few days later they caught a pretty nasty cold. Instead of it going away like a normal cold does, it started to get worse, pretty soon they couldn't move at all, not even lift a finger. After developing hot flashes, they start to lose the ability to speak, and you know they are about to die when they start to have rashes appear upon their skin.” 
“Have you asked the doctors if they can find a cure?” 
“Yes, we have already put them onto it, but for now there is nothing.”
Thinking about what he should do, Taeyong's hand comes up to scratch his jawline. He knows that he has to alert the public of the outbreak now. “Okay, since there is no discernible way in which they get it, we can assume for now that it is passed from excessive human contact. Doyoung, I need you to release a statement stating that there should be no excessive contact between everyone. If able to avoid big crowds then stay away.” 
Writing the commands down in a notebook, Doyoung asks, “Anything else?” 
“Yes, since it has gotten a lot bigger now, the public must be alerted, even though by now I am sure they have each heard their own variations of what’s happening. It’s better to tell them the truth than lie. We need everyone to be fully informed with correct information so that they don’t make things worse.” A tired sigh falls from his lips, “Release a doctor’s statement. I want the royal doctor to make a statement that will tell the public all they need to know about this new illness so they can protect themselves.”
“On it, Your Highness.” Doyoung says, turning around and quickly heading out the door. You were supposed to come visit Taeyong today. He's glad he gets to see you. You always make things better for him. You walk into Taeyong’s office to him writing something in a notebook. He was so involved in what he was writing that he didn’t hear you come in.  
“Hey Yongie.” Walking over to the male, you see him raise his head from the paper, looking at you with a dazzling smile. 
“Hello, beautiful.” Taeyong pulls you into his lap, “How was your day, my rose?” You start rambling on about what was going on at the pharmacy, and Taeyong finds himself zoning out looking at you talking animatedly about a customer you had today. It’s times like these where Taeyong realizes he could never live his life without you. 
Taeyong has been really busy lately, dealing with the disease outbreak. You guys have hardly seen each other. New word had been put out about the disease after one of the people who are believed to have gotten it first were found. Sadly they were on their last string, but their family said something about them eating a strange fruit some odd days before they had gotten sick. 
Business for you has practically skyrocketed, people hurrying to get all types of medicines just out of plain fear that they might contract the disease. Even though there is no cure yet, they still think that arthritis medicine will somehow help them. 
You had secretly been working on your own attempt at creating a cure, wanting to help Taeyong and get some of the pressure off of his shoulders and wanting to help the people affected by this disease. Of course it has gotten nowhere, but at least you try. 
You had asked Taeyong what the fruit that their family said they ate looked like in hopes of being able to find it and base an antidote off of that. He gave you the same description they gave him, but it didn’t lead anywhere. Noticing how empty the pharmacy had become, you felt it was the perfect time to go pick up some bread. 
Flipping the sign and locking the door you head towards the bakery. Ever since the decree had been made for people to not group together, the streets had been the emptiest you had ever seen. Walking in, you couldn’t help but notice the other people that stood around talking waiting on their baked goods. Putting in your order, you stand off to the side. 
“You know, they say that Emperor Taeyong has caught the disease.”
“What?! You can’t be serious.” 
“Why would I joke about something like that?” the first lady says, looking well over offended. “I have a friend who has a cousin who has a brother who has a boyfriend that works in the palace.” 
“Woah, so you basically know the emperor.” 
“Exactly. I swear on it, the emperor has the disease.” You proceed to tune out the gossiping women on the other side of the room. You know that there’s a good chance the lady is lying, but what if Taeyong has the disease? He hasn’t come to visit in a few days. You feel your chest constrict at the mere thought. 
You’re so distraught that you don’t hear the baker telling you your order is ready until after she walks up to you and hands you your bread. “Oh, uhh thank you.” Giving the lady a small nod, you walk out of the bakery.
When you get back to the house, you check for mail and find some in the mailbox next to your door. Picking it up, you notice the royal insignia on the envelope. Figuring it’s from Taeyong, you instantly start to tear it open.
Hello my rose, I don’t know how to say this to you, but I’m sick, really sick. I got the disease. I’m so sorry darling. Worst of all is I can’t even see you. I absolutely forbid you from coming here. Do you hear me? From now until we meet again, we can communicate by letter. I love you so much, my rose. 
Love, Your Yongie
As your mind slowly starts to register the note, your knees instantly give out, bringing you to the floor of your living room. You can barely register the sting from the impact. You couldn’t help but let out a broken gut-wrenching cry. Your tears feel like fire as they run down your face. You clutch your heart; it’s as if you can feel it breaking. 
Everyday Taeyong sends you a letter and everyday you put it in the pile with the others. It broke your heart every time you would put the letters unopened together with the others and never wrote a response back, but recently you had thrown your entire being into finding a cure for the disease. You couldn’t risk another breakdown like when you first found out, because every single second matters. 
Every second you spend trying to find a cure brings you closer to a forever with Taeyong, and you couldn’t risk that. You still open and run the pharmacy like normal, but even then you spend all of your time asking customers everything they know about the disease and whatever anyone they knew who had it was going through. 
Lately, the way you’ve been going at it was to find the fruit that supposedly started it all and find out why the human body reacts so badly to it. You just managed to find it yesterday while you were out in the forest for the third time hunting for it. You were planning to do some tests and see what you possibly can do. 
A series of harsh knocks rain upon the pharmacy door and the irritation at the possible customer shows on your face. “I’m sorry but we’re clo–” Your sentence stops abruptly as Doyoung harshly shoves past you, the anger and tension in his body evident.
“You know, you have some fucking nerve. Taeyong is literally dying right now, he is fucking dying yet he still manages to write you everyday. And on days when he can’t muster the strength he gets someone to write what he says.” Whipping his body around he faces you, face scrunched in a horrendous snarl, “And you can’t even take the time to write a fucking letter back. All you do is sit in this pharmacy and play in your stupid garden all day.”
It’s then that he notices the pile of letters sitting neatly on your desk, a scoff pushes its way past his lips, “Oh my fucking god, you didn’t have the decency to even open them. Have you ever even loved him? Tell me. Honestly.” He stares directly into your eyes, the fire in them seemingly endless. “Or was he just some toy? A part in some plan you had to get rich and become an empress or some shit. Did you just use my best friend for your own selfish reasons?” 
Your mouth opens, preparing to say something only for it to close again. Repeating that process multiple times you find out that there were no words you could say that would satisfy him. “And it’s funny because if that was your plan, then it worked. I know you don’t know but Taeyong planned to propose, he wanted–no, wants to spend the rest of his life with you. I wasn’t supposed to tell you, but oh well.” At his statement, your mouth falls open again, leaving you utterly speechless. 
A moment of silence passes and a heavy sigh from the male fills the air. He stares tiredly at your desk, exasperated. “He’s dying, simple as that. Doctor says he doesn’t have much longer before the rashes start popping up. His estimate was at most two weeks.” With his face angled away from you, the tears that streamed down his face weren’t visible. “Do what you will with that information. I don’t have the time for this.” 
Turning his body, Doyoung walks out the door, leaving a chill in the air. You don’t even have it in you to cry. Your sorrow runs farther than any river in the world, yet the thought that kept you from breaking down was Taeyong’s smile. Then you realized you would never be able to see it again if there was no cure. Swiping  away the tears that managed to fall, you get back to work. Taeyong wasn’t going to die on your watch. 
Your chest felt so tight, like it was squeezing all of the air out of your lungs. You could barely feel the shock of your heavy footfalls on the pavement as you ran like your life depended on it. The steps to the palace have never seemed longer as you ran, hoping you made it in time. Passing guards all were blurs as you swore you were running at the speed of light. 
Making your way to Taeyong’s room, you see a distraught Doyoung crouched outside of the door. His silent cries cued your heart to fall to your aching feet. Barely able to get the words out you ask, “Am I too late, is-is he g-gone?” Your voice broke as you spoke those words. Doyoung doesn’t say anything as he silently raises his head to look at you. “I can’t be late. I-I found it, I found the cure. I have the cure to save Taeyong.” 
Not able to withstand Doyoung’s gaze, you burst through the king’s bedroom doors, instantly spotting the palace doctor at his bed. Taeyong lays lifelessly on the bed, chest barely managing to move up and down. This was not the Taeyong you knew, not the man you fell in love with. This man was just but a shell of him. You had never seen his skin so pale, his face sunken in to the point where you can easily see his cheekbones you loved to rain kisses on. 
“Doctor.” Your gaze shifts from the sleeping male to the doctor beside him, “He’s not… dead, is he?”
“No, not yet, but I do recommend you give your last goodbyes.” 
Walking up the man, you forcefully push the vial containing the cure into his hands, “Here, this is the cure.” Broken stutters leave the man's mouth as he questions the integrity of your statement. “Listen, we don’t have a lot of time; just trust that it will work. I have tested it on five different people, all of varying ages, and four out of five of those people survived. The only reason the fifth didn’t was because they were too far gone.” 
You update the doctor on what the antidote is and what it does. “The antidote is not a cure per say, it doesn’t get rid of the disease. I studied the fruit that the disease stems from and something in the DNA of it, let's just say it doesn't agree with something in our DNA, which causes basically an allergic reaction times 100. This antidote soothes the part of our DNA that reacts so badly, and that in turn stops the allergic reaction so that it doesn’t kill us. Now that I’ve wasted time explaining that to you, can we please get the antidote in his system?”
All of your talking caused the sickly emperor to awaken to your voice in the room with him. “Y/n, what are you doing here? I thought I told you to not come here. I-” 
“Taeyong, calm down, baby, please. I am here to save you.” You nod to the doctor giving him the go for the injection. “The doctor is about to inject the cure for the disease into you, then you’re going to get better for me, okay?”
After administering the shot, Taeyong had fallen asleep again from lack of energy. It had been 10 hours and you sat every single one on his bedside, wanting to be the first to see him. In those 10 hours, you told the doctor how to make more of the cure so that he could get it to everyone, and Doyoung finally came into the room after hearing what you had done, and gave you a proper apology for snapping at you. 
You feel a hand grip yours, and you snap your head up to see Taeyong looking back at you with a smile as big as he could conjure right now placed on his face. Quickly handing him some water, you start to question how he feels. Telling you he feels the best he has in weeks was good enough to satiate you for now. 
When Taeyong had finally convinced you to lay in bed with him, you chose this moment to give him his answer. 
“Yes.” A look of confusion covers Taeyong’s face as he wonders what you are saying yes to. “Yes, I will marry you.”  
You and Taeyong decided not to have a huge wedding, instead choosing to hold a ceremony with just a few of your closest friends, but you did have to present yourself to the empire now as the new empress.
“Are you ready, my rose?” Taeyong asks, walking up behind you in front of the mirror, enclosing his arms around your waist. You turn around to look at him directly, taking in his attire. 
“Why do you have such a heavy robe?” you question, noticing the heavy piece of clothing. You’d always wondered that whenever you would see him out of the palace. 
Shrugging his shoulders, Taeyong plants a kiss upon your cheek, “I-I don’t know it’s just customary, I never thought to change it.”
“Well, for my first decree as empress, I declare that you get a new robe, a lighter one.” you say, dusting the imaginary dust off of his shoulders. “You don’t need to have such a heavy weight on your shoulders. You can tell it weighs you down. I don’t want you to overexert yourself.”
“Will do, my empress. Come, we have to go now.” 
It was getting to the last leg of the parade the citizens held in your honor. You felt so welcome by everyone. You were expecting people to hate you because you weren’t already a royal before you married Taeyong. “How are you holding up, darling? I know these things can take a lot out of people.”
“I am fine, my love, just slightly tired.” You can’t help but wave at every person you see, feeding off of their enthusiasm. Overcome with emotion, Taeyong can’t help it when he cradles your face in his hands, lowering his head whilst tilting yours to give him room, and plants a loving kiss upon your cheek. Your cheeks were on fire at his public display of affection in front of everyone, yet you found yourself fully indulging in the kiss, closing your eyes in hopes of savoring the moment. The kiss caused an uproar within the crowd, the citizens ecstatic at the relationship between you both. 
“Taeyong, what was that earlier today? Why’d you kiss me?” 
“I’m sorry, baby. I couldn’t help it when I saw you and how happy you looked waving at everyone,” he explains pulling you into another kiss, but this time on the lips. Slowly the kiss becomes heated and you start pawing at each other's clothes, almost ripping them off. Taeyong plants kisses along your neck as you begin to fondle his soft manhood. 
You feel Taeyong’s hand slide to your cunt rubbing your clit, “Looks like someones already ready for me. I wonder who made you this wet sweetie.” he taunts, slowly pressing one finger inside of you then a second curving them up and spreading them out in order to stretch your tight hole. Your low breathy moans fill the room bouncing off of each and every wall. 
Pretty soon you both are ready, blindly walking yourself to the bed you land on the soft cushion with an oomph. Taeyong slowly grinds his now hard cock up and down your slit puposely prodding at your clit. You wriggle your hips silently begging the male to hurry up and put it in. 
Giving into you because he was just as excited Taeyong finally slides himself in, his stiffness getting completely engulfed by your wet hot cavern. “Mmm, I’ll never get used to how well your needy pussy takes me in baby.” His slow thrusts simultaneously scratching that itch but just enough to make it come back for more.
“Harder Tae, I need to feel you wreck me.” Granting your wish taeyong stops the gentle loving strokes, swapping them out for a harsher more unforgiving thrusts. His hips smack yours as Taeyong puts what feels like all the power he has in his thrusts. You close your eyes and see stars as Taeyong fucks your soul out of you. His hands have an unforgiving grip on your waist, one going up to massage your breast, teasing your nipple.
Taeyong starts laying kisses along your body leaving purple spots in his wake. “ I want everyone to see that you are mine and I am yours forever and always.” Whispering in your ear, “Go ahead and cum for me baby, let everyone know what we’re doing so they can see who you belong to.” 
You all but scream Taeyong’s name out in pure ecstasy as you cum the hardest you ever have to date. It felt as if you had been transported to another world. Taeyong cums right behind you filling you to the brim with his seed. “It’s a little too late to say this now but I think it’s about time we start thinking about children.” He says pulling himself out of your now swollen lower region. 
“Oh my god shut up, I hate you,” you cry, out rolling your eyes
“I love you too, my rose.” 
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annabethy · 4 years
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under the mistletoe, watching the fire glow day 9: cliffs
Character A vows to do something nice for a stranger during the Christmas time. Character B is that stranger,, percabeth
Percy happens to think that he’s a nice human being. He tries to be, at least. He has his moments because no one is perfect, but he’s always done his best to be considerate of those around him.
So when his friend tells him that he’s really not a nice person, he just about loses it.
“I am not a bad person!”
Leo raises his hands defensively. “I’m not saying you’re a bad person. All I’m saying is that you could be a little bit more... generous.”
Piper rolls her eyes. “Leave the poor man alone, Leo.”
“I’m generous,” he says, miffed.
“But...” Leo waves his hands wildly, and Percy feels the instinct to punch him in the nose and make him Rudolph. “Do something nice for once.”
“Percy,” Piper says, “he’s just mad that you didn’t give him a piece of your gingerbread cookie. Don’t listen to him.”
Still, it stings just a little bit. Even if it’s a joke, Percy doesn’t think it’s very funny. That’s what prompts him to do something kind this Christmas. He honestly doesn’t know what he plans on doing because what could he do? Buy all of someone’s presents and also go broke in the process? Maybe he could buy someone’s cheap coffee, but then is it really something nice if it’s only two dollars?
Whatever it is, Percy knows that Leo has to be there to see it so he can make Leo choke on his words. The only problem then, though, is that Leo would no doubt say something along the lines of you’re only doing it because you want to prove me wrong, not because you care, bla bla bla, and the Percy will actually shank Leo with a peppermint candy cane.
Percy tries so hard to find the chance to make someone’s Christmas, but it’s so much harder than he would’ve thought. People ignore him when he’s speaking to them about buying their order, or they think it’s some weird Christmas ploy.
He doesn’t get to do something kind until Christmas day.
Percy’s standing in the freezing air on top of a snow-tubing mountain. His friends had dragged him here against his will, because despite being a native New Yorker, he hated the cold. He wanted to be included though, so he came along anyways, stuffed into a black snow suit and a knitted hat. His nose burns from the icy atmosphere, and his fingers are numb. He considers checking for frostbite but then he decides he’d rather not know.
He’s standing on a small wall of ice overlooking everyone else. Leo is somewhere to his right, threatening to push Piper off of the wall, and Percy purposely avoids making eye contact in fear that he’ll be next.
The wall of ice can’t be anything more than five or six feet. He doesn’t know if they’re actually allowed to be up there, but there’s so many people doing the same thing that he’s not too worried.
He watches as a few people jump off of the wall into the fluffy layer of snow, vaguely listening to the conversations around him. He hears a mother hassling her children, and his ears perk up as he notices her muttering something along the lines of her not being able to afford buying them each a hot chocolate from the cabin that lays near the bottom of the mountain.
Percy doesn’t stop to think first, which is probably a mistake.
“I can buy it for you,” he interjects kindly, thrilled that he’s finally getting the chance to do something nice.
The mom looks at him, and it’s almost as though she’s appalled that he’s spoken to her. Percy shrinks back.
“I’m good,” she says.
“I don’t mind,” he continues, more nervous. “It’s only a couple dollars each, and—”
She holds a hand up. “I don’t want to have sex with you.”
Percy’s mind comes to a screeching halt. “What!? That’s not what I—”
“You’re going to tell me that you’re offering to pay twenty dollars and it’s not because you want to sleep with me?”
“No! I was just trying to do something nice for a stranger after my friend said—”
“I don’t want to hear it!” she snaps, already beginning to walk away from Percy. “Follow me and I’ll cut your dick off.”
It’s so shocking to him that he doesn’t even have time to respond before she’s already gone. He truly must have the worst luck because he’s just trying to create Christmas magic, and everyone seems to be doing the exact opposite of that.
Percy’s mouth gapes slightly, his brain still not comprehending what just happened. He’s only pulled out of the haze when someone snorts next to him.
He turns his eyes and catches a girl looking like she was smothering laughter.
“I’m sorry,” she says, laughter now bubbling out of her lips. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen a conversation go so wrong so quickly.”
“I don’t even know what I did,” he mutters, scratching the back of his neck.
“Something she didn’t like, apparently.” She’s still giggling slightly, and Percy thinks it’s kind of cute. She’s shorter than him, and her nose has a red tint to it. He can see the puff of air each time she takes a breath, and she looks like she’s ready to go inside and curl into a ball for a nap.
“God. That’s embarrassing.”
“I got a front row seat to that show,” she says. “Why are you trying to do something nice, anyways?”
Percy is surprised that a stranger would want to talk to him after witnessing that, but he doesn’t mind. “My friend called me a horrible person and said I was going to hell.”
“Ouch.”
“That’s not exactly what he said,” he admits, “but he might as well have. He’s dead to me.”
“And yet you’re still trying to please a stranger,” she says wryly.
“I don’t want to go to hell,” he whines, and she laughs softly.
“I’m sure you won’t go to hell. You might lose your genitalia, but you’re not going to hell.”
“Yes, thank you for the reminder,” he says. The faint music in the background changes songs, and she rolls her eyes.
“This music is getting out of hand,” she says. “It’s like they’re trying to suffocate us in Christmas spirit.”
“It could be worse, don’t you think?”
“Is rather drown in eggnog than listen to another Christmas song.” She thinks for a moment, looking out into the distance off of the cliff of ice. “Can you promise to push me off this cliff if all I want for Christmas is youplays again?”
Percy chokes. “Push you off the cliff?”
“Yes, please.”
“I wouldn’t want to hurt you,” he says.
“Nothing could hurt more than having my ears bleed to that song. I think it would be easier to simply die and get reborn as Santa’s slaves in the north pole.”
“Oh, wow.”
“Besides, this could be your chance to do something nice.”
“Does murder count as something nice?”
“In certain situations, maybe.”
Percy smiles, though he instantly regrets it when his teeth start to ache. “What’s your name?”
“I’m Annabeth,” she says.
“Percy,” he returns. “So before I get arrested for shoving you off a cliff, let me just make sure I’m hearing this right. You want me to push you off that ledge if Mariah Carey starts playing?”
“Exactly. You have my full permission.”
“Great,” he chokes out. They lock eyes and chuckle slightly at their own antics. Percy thinks someone calls his name from somewhere behind him, but he’s much preoccupied to turn around. Percy doesn’t think Annabeth would be someone to bully him, unlike some friends.
Percy thinks he should write a letter to Leo about his recent harassment. He thinks little rascals is a good baseline. It would start with, Dear Darla, I hate your stinking guts. You make me vomit. You’re scum between my toes. That’ll show him.
“Are you alone?” Annabeth asks kindly.
“I’m here with my friends, but I might as well be alone. They’re mean. I don’t like them.”
“You sure they’re your friends?”
“Eh. Not really,” he says, but he’s only kidding. He loves them dearly, even if they’re the worst people he has ever met. Leo in particular.
“Lovely,” she says. Her gloved hands reach up to move a strand of hair away from her mouth. The wind has started blowing harder, and it’s beginning to tangle her hair. “I’ll be your friend, then. I won’t bully you.”
“I hardly know you. How can I be sure you won’t bully me?”
“I guess you’ll just have to stick around and find out.”
He wouldn’t mind sticking around, he thinks. Especially not with the way she’s looking at him, making him feel the urge to pull her in close and protect her from the biting winds.
As they continue talking, Percy can’t help but think that he likes her. He really like her, actually. She’s sweet and funny, always having something to quip back to him. He finds out soon that she lives quite close to him, and something in him screams to ask her if she wants to do something soon. He holds off on that, but he still can feel the way his heart threatens to pound out of his chest.
A sly grin forms on his face as he hears the change in music. It’s not a song that’s easy to miss, so it catches his ear immediately, and he is prepared.
“Hey, Annabeth.”
“What?”
“Guess what’s playing.”
She tilts her head as she listens to the music, and then she groans in annoyance. “Of course it is.”
“I promised to do something nice this Christmas.” She blinks. “You did.”
“I gotta do it to you.”
“Percy—”
“I made a promise,” he says, shrugging. He steps forwards, and she takes a step back, but there’s a wide grin on her face.
“Don’t you dare,” she threatens with zero malice in her voice.
“It’s my duty to you,” he says. “I don’t break my promises.” With that, he fulfils the gap between them, grabbing her in his arms by the waist and lifting her up. She wiggles in his grasp, letting her legs go limp, and she’s laughing until she can’t breathe.
Percy brings her to the ledge, his smile matching hers, and as he tries to drop her as gently as possible, she grabs on tighter and pulls, and he goes tumbling face-first into the snow with her.
He lands somewhat on top of her, and his face is buried surprisingly deep. He pulls his face out of the hole he’s dug, and when he looks at her, her head is thrown back as she lets out uncontrollable giggles. When she looks at him, it only gets worse.
“Your eyelashes are covered in snow,” she gasps, wiping carelessly at his face for him. She kicks him off of her lazily and leans back, looking up at the sky. “You ass.”
“I just did what you asked me to!”
“I didn’t think you’d actually do it.”
“But you’re alive, and I’ve done my good deed! We both win.”
She shakes her head at him, eyeing him is mock disappointment. “I change my mind. I am going to bully you.”
“You’d have to stick around long enough for that,” he reminds her.
“After you just tried to kill me? You bet I’m sticking around, if only for revenge.”
Percy pouts. “I’m so scared.”
“You better be because when I push you off a cliff, it isn’t going to be seven feet into snow.”
“At least I can die happy knowing that I did my good deed for the year.” Percy turns onto his size and gazes deeply into her eyes. Her eyes fit in perfectly to the scene around them, layers of white snow, barren trees in the distance, matching the grey sky above. He really does want to see her again, to find out if she’s as soft as she looks, if she’s as perfect for hugging as she seems, if she wants to kiss him as bad as he wants to kiss her.
He gets his answer when she says, “You haven’t finished your good deed quite yet.” Percy pretends to be oblivious. “Oh? What else do I need to do?”
She smiles in the perfect way he just knows he’s going to fall in love with. “Kiss me.”
He pulls her in close, both of them still laying in the snow, ice beginning to seep into their backs, and when he puts his lips to hers, she’s warm and sweet and perfect.
And when she pulls away to lock eyes with him before slamming his face back into the snow, he can’t even be mad. She’s cute, looking at him proudly, and he’s falling in love with this stranger on Christmas night.
,, courtesy of ash @silenabeth​
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mightysteelix · 3 years
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Pent Up Desires (Fic)
Ever since the summer event last year, I've been toying with the idea of a larger Robin. And now that its rerun is about to come, I've decided that it is time to finally write it out - and meanwhile hit as many of my kink buttons as possible. This is the result - one of my most indulgent works (if not the most indulgent work to beat them all).
Rating: Explicit Category: M/M Fandoms: Fate/Grand Order Relationship: Robin Hood | Archer/Billy the Kid | Archer Characters: Robin Hood | Archer and Billy the Kid | Archer Summary: Do you remember when B.B. said she would turn Robin into a pig during ServaFes? What if she followed on the threat, albeit with quite the twist?
Robin is cursed and can't control himself around food. Billy has promised to help, but he can't control himself around Robin.
Weight-gain kink fic. Don’t like, don’t read.
WARNING FOR KINK CONTENTS UNDER THE CUT
Additional Tags: Weight Gain; Belly Kink; Size Kink; Size Difference; Masturbation; Dry Humping; Stuffing; musclechub; Robin gets huge; And Billy tries not to jerk off whenever he sees him; Self-Indulgent
LAST WARNING FOR KINK
Summer was in full swing, and Babbage blasted enough steam to make Chaldea hotter than a waterless hole in the heart of the prairie. So, it did not come as a shock that Robin was rockin’ only trunks and an open shirt, which showed some well-sculpted arms. The guy was hell-fired handsome with the finest body ever, and if he wanted to kick back, Billy wouldn’t protest. Nay, what hit like a bullet to the brain was the ton of food in front of him—meats, loaves of bread, and a raft of drinks.
“How’s it goin’, partner?” Billy plopped down in a chair next to Robin. “Famished after Servant Fes sucked the life outta ya?”
“It’s…” Robin, with a larger scowl on his face than usual, panted. “It’s that… purple-haired witch’s fault.” He grabbed a drumstick and tore off some meat like a starved wolf. “She threatened to turn me in a pig…” His face was red with effort. “We had to win her Holy Grail…” He bit another chunk. “Don’t worry,”—Billy stifled a giggle when Robin mocked the Master’s voice—“she won’t follow on it.’ It’s easy to speak when this isn’t happening to them!” After chewin’ the last of the drumstick thoroughly, he swallowed. The slow gulp traveled down his throat and into his stomach. Robin punched his chest and exhaled in relief.
Billy’s eyes followed it and glued themselves to Robin’s gut. It was taut, bloated, as large as a basketball—and just as hard if he touched it. The pressure was makin’ the skin around the belly button burn angrily. The trunks rested under the overgorged curve, a trial of ginger peekin’ below the band. “True, partner, you’re becomin’ a nice piggy,” Billy quipped. “So, the purple lass’s itchin’ for a vendetta, and she chose ya?”
After he popped a soda open and drank half the bottle—his gurglin’ gut sloshin’ and expandin’ even more—Robin nodded. “She cursed the clothes. And I must’ve stepped on her toes something fierce when I complained to Master. Now I can’t even take the swimsuit off.” He grit his teeth, his handsome face (Was that the start of a double chin? Nay, don’t stare!) grimacin’ as he tried to keep the fizz down. His strained jaws opened as if pried apart, and with shakin’ hands, he poured in the rest of the drink. His neck bobbed; his stomach filled and grew in every direction. “Whenever I see—urp!”
Robin closed his mouth. His cheeks bulged with a held-back belch. Yet the stress forced his lips to open: “UUUURRPPP!” He bowed his limp head away. “Excuse me,” he muttered. “But when there’s any food—anything—I must eat it. It doesn’t matter if I’ll explode; my hands will push it down to my stomach.” He slapped the swollen ball, it barely swayin’. Something bubbled in its depths rose in his throat, and he let out another lengthy burp.
Bitin’ his lips, Billy leaned closer. “Have ya tried stayin’ outta here? Far from the eyes, far from the heart and all that?” he advised Robin, his eyes lookin’ anywhere but that overstuffed middle.
“I’m trying. But she’s pulling that Archer’s strings, too.” Robin grunted and glanced at the kitchen while devourin’ a buttered slice of bread. “If I leave my room, he’s on my tail with a cupcake or some other treat. Before I know it, I am dragged here and”—he pointed to the ungodly number of plates—“you see the rest.”
Billy nodded slowly, his whole willpower holdin’ him from lickin’ his lips. A fire was blazin’ in his chest—and his groin. He knew EMIYA’s dirty little secret way too well: the way a man’s gluttony melted him faster than an ice cube durin’ high noon. The Archer had left his treats unguarded when Amakusa discovered his sweet tooth. And when the Ruler came one morning, enormously flabby and flauntin’ it at every step, the pervert couldn’t stop blushin’! For Billy’s shock, neither could he. So did they become accomplices, secret friends bound by a common desire.
But gettin’ his pleasure from Robin, who hated every second of it? Damn, that was a new lowest of the low! Billy’s neck ached with strain as he did his best not to look, but he wouldn’t give in! “Forgive the question, partner,” he dropped it, hopin’ to divert the talk, “but if ya’re stuffin’ down so much food, how are ya not as fat as that priest boy?”
Robin clicked his tongue. “I’ve been burning off the calories. When I am not gulping down food here, I’m in the gym to work out. Doesn’t stop flab from piling.” Billy squinted, lookin’ for it, and caught himself. “But it does help.”
With some vigor, Billy’s line of sight moved higher—towards Robin’s arms. True, they were meatier, fillin’ the short sleeves of the shirt. Robin wasn’t a stick before, either, but now he was more powerful. Gorwin’. Maybe his legs had also bulked, but Billy didn’t wanna risk lookin’ at that gut again.
“Of course, after the training, my stomach is starving, and I chew down more food to make up for it. You should see how much EMIYA brings me then.”
Even more? Billy gulped—and before his brain could call out the horrible, horrible idea, he spoke. “Do ya need a partner for this job, partner? Someone to help with the trainin’ and to keep your appetite under control? Because ya can rely on me!”
“You know, that might help. Thanks a bunch!” Robin’s relieved smile stabbed Billy’s heart like a dagger. “Do you want to try it once I’m done here?”
“Sorry!” Billy jumped outta his chair. He wasn’t goin’ to ditch Robin—he owed up to his offers. “I’ve gotta do something else first!” Namely, one red Archer needed a few bullet wounds and a lecture on personal boundaries. “But tomorrow I’ll help ya!” And hopefully, he wouldn’t end distracted by that amazing, achy, hungry gut.
---
“Damn that EMIYA!” Billy shouted as he collapsed on his bed. “And that purple wretch, too! When did they form their party?” His talk with the red Archer a day ago had gone to the dogs. That man had balls of steel—no matter how many threats or bullets Billy wasted, EMIYA did not budge. And B.B. had hidden in her little mouse hole, without a trace of her anywhere in Chaldea. Billy couldn’t find her, no matter how many rooms he checked—as the stupid chef had told him.
“No whiff of the Master, either,” Billy grumbled. Da Vinci had promised to deal with the unruly pair, but B.B. would stop only if her so precious senpai ordered her. And unless she lifted the curse before breakfast tomorrow, Billy woulda to help Robin with the training again. The pillow muffled his screams. His heart woulda exploded in his chest after watchin’ his partner once. God help him if he had to see him bustle those weights while his gut shifted and gurgled. He hadn’t stopped glarin’ at the packed sphere once, paying attention and squirmin’ whenever it swayed. Robin’s unintended teasin’—him drummin’ over the sphere every once in a while—made it even worse. Billy barely had survived today; tomorrow would kill him!
Even worse, he said some calories stuck as fat. Did that mean an ever-flabbier Robin with a softenin’ gut? How much feedin’s would it take ‘till it became an enormous tank of lard; ‘till it sagged over his deck and he needed someone’s help to jerk himself off? It would jiggle whenever he took a step, it would flop over his shorts—hell, Robin woulda to pull them under his belly! His shirt would hide nothing; nay, it would show off those juicy curves.
Billy’s crotch twitched. No! He clenched fists, his nails diggin’ in his palms. “I’m not beatin’ it to Robin, no matter how smokin’ hot he becomes!” There were boundaries to those things! He rolled, now lyin’ on his back. His dick was makin’ a tent in his pants. The movement only made it rub against the fabric, and the pleasure flared up even more. “Self-control, self-control, self-control!” Billy repeated like a mantra. A burnin’, powerful feelin’ arose in his chest.
Would Robin gain love handles, too? They’d be juicy and plump, always to be grabbed when there was a chance. Billy imagined squeezin’ them in his fingers, the flab jigglin’. Would they push his shirt even higher, so large that nothing would cover them? And when Robin tugged it relentlessly, his gut would shake. The threads would strain and groan, but the clothes wouldn’t fit over that engorged mass. When he gained moobs…
Billy shut his eyes. His body was tense and feverishly hot. Sweat was burnin’ his forehead, and the flame in his dick pulsated through him. He shouldn’t think about those two swayin’, soft sacks of flab. He shouldn’t imagine carresin’ them, kissin’ them. Precum moistened his underpants.
“Who knew: I’m a pervert enough to do it!” Gruntin’, Billy peeled off his pants and pulled down his briefs, freein’ his dick. “Only this time!” He snatched the lube from his nightstand—his hands trembled and almost dropped it on the floor—and generously coated his fingers. “Do yer fuckin’ worst, libido!” he swore and began pumpin’ his cock. The first touch rustled through his body, a torrent of pleasure to drown him. No, oh no, oh, oh, oh yes, yes! He was breathin’ heavily, and his hand didn’t stop.
Robin’s moobs would show under his shirt—nay, so large that he couldn’t fit clothes over them. He’d parade around naked, a total show-off, his gut, and moobs, and love handles, and delicious, delicious backrolls for the whole world to ogle. The shirt would be a mere piece of fabric, stretched and useless, good only for hidin’ his shoulders—if even that!
Billy tried to hold his moans—keep at least that dignity. His insides were coilin’, his muscles were shiverin’. His dick stiffened more, and he drew every movement long until his body woulda broken under the strain of lust. He gulped the moan down, opened his lips for a hasty breath, and closed them immediately, the pant havin’ built up in his throat.
Robin would become a titan of a man, his torso a lardy mountain. He would carry all the weight, his freakin’ strong body put to good use. Those powerful arms he boasted an entire day—that was a start because he would also swell with packed flesh. His shorts would tear around his tights, the veiny mass crackin’ them apart. But he would pay no attention to that. The curse would drive him to eat and eat, glut himself more, unable to fight the thrall of the food. He would complain of his growth but never resist because he couldn’t—not even when he outgrew the chairs, the doors, the halls.
His stomach would be stuffed at all times, yet callin’ for more. What if Billy brought him snacks to the gym? Robin went only there and to the dinin’ hall. What if they shortened that time? What if he did not stop fillin’ his gut, gorgin’ himself, the sphere bloatin’ out of proportions, dominatin’ his already enormous frame? Then he would explode into more impossible, more gargantuan sizes. There would be no end, no control, only expansion and flab, and muscle…
Billy arched his back. A desperate, loud moan—almost a hiss—left his lips before he could bite it down. He was thrusting more rapidly, hastily, desperate for that release. If only he coulda Robin with himself, to have his way him.
If he were there—small, almost invisible next to the giant that was Robin, he would cheer. He would rejoice as the other Archer lifted heavier and heavier weights in the gym, his muscles so swole that they would tear the skin open. Veins would run under the sweaty flesh, visible over the bloated mass. And when Robin wanted to eat… Oh, boy, Billy would make sure he packed away his fill. He would push the meals in the other Archer’s mouth, rub his belly to provide comfort, and squish the flab under his fingertips, enjoy it as the gut would seemingly grow under his touch. Or, it would be tight and heavy, stretched to its limits, angry and protestin’ the constant stuffings. But it would be so used to the fullness and the cursed hunger that Robin wouldn’t handle a second without bein’ stuffed. It would be like an addiction—nay, it would be one—to eatin’, to blowin’ up, to growin’ fatter.
And if Robin enjoyed it as much as Billy, then the blond would have no problem givin’ some bonus help. He closed his eyes and imagined Robin’s dick in his hand. The massive roll of his gut pressed into the fingers, and as Billy stroked the cock, it would groan and roar, so overstuffed that it could burst open. He could also ride that massive ball, rub his member all over it while pushin’ caloric meals into Robin’s stomach. Or he could push his shaft between the two lardy ass checks and fuck Robin!
There, almost there! Billy was pantin’, out of breath, hot as coals. His ghosting fingertips ran across the red tip of his dick. It was an itchy, sudden touch that quickly ended. He hoped to prolong that sick, depraved cravin’ for as long as possible. Thoughts of relief were pushed to the corners of his mind.
Once their efforts came to an end, Robin would be huge, too large for his puny clothes. He would march around Chaldea, showin’ off his naked, heavy, thick body. The muscles would sway, the veins of his biceps and calves would shift. His enormous gut—so enormous that it would fall over his erect dick—would gurgle at every step: either achy and overfilled or not full enough and needin’ more. Robin would tend to it, gloat, relish in his new size and consume even more food. He would feed himself further into titanic sizes. Control would slip out of his mind. After gorgin’ himself, he’d be so horny, so desperate, that he’d pound Billy straight there in the canteen.
Cum shot outta Billy’s cock over his hand, and he was moanin’. His sheets were sticky as the white liquid soaked them., but he kept squeezin’ the last few lustful drops. The heat was sated, the achin’ hole in his chest filled for the time bein’. But, he realized with newfound clarity, tomorrow it would set him on fire again. And the thought of Robin attackin’ the filled tables like a beast sent a shiver down his dick again.
---
“Almost… There!” Robin grunted, gritting his teeth, and pushed up the barbell. His arms stretched, his large muscles expandin’ to their full size and squeezin’ again. His sleeves were already rolled as high as possible, not fittin’ around his swollen arms but tried to creep up more. Sweat was glistenin’ on the skin as it rippled - a proof of the effort he was puttin’ in. His round pecs—as big as apples—flexed, hard despite the flab that covered them. They swayed rhythmically as the weight moved up and down, plusatin’, tensin, and relaxin’: one, two; one, two. Billy’s eyes traced them as they shook, and he could see himself gropin’ them, holdin’ that powerful flesh… “And done!” Robin’s proud shout snapped out Billy. But it was for the worse because the huge Archer sittin’ on the bench let the barbell in place and scratched the curve of his gut, which rolled over his waist.
Fidgetin’ and tremblin, about as helpful as a snowball in a summer gunfight, Billy was warmin’ a nearby bench. He had been comin’ every day, unable to tear eyes away from the clothes that seemed to shrink around Robin’s growin’ body. The gym trips didn’t make him any smaller—especially when, after every workout session, Robin gorged himself until his bloated stomach couldn’t fit a morsel more. Then, he’d complain he was so full, drag out long moans and poke the stuffed sphere. As he sated his gluttony, it distended, pushed out more, and sometimes—a hot thrill cut through Billy—rested on his lap.
Billy bit his lips, strugglin’ not to slip a hand down in his pants right at the gym. He rubbed his tights together. His face was sizzlin’ like fire, and his breaths were rushed, unruly, desperate. He shook his head, hopin’ to clear the fantasy, but choose the damned best worst moment.
Robin jumped on the floor. The shockwave rocked the bench. Didn’t the equipment also rattle? Billy swallowed and the gulp lodged in his throat. He was shiverin’, truly feverish, trying’ to look away from the handsome behemoth. He knew what was comin’, but his neck refused to budge.
“Let’s go to the canteen.” Robin grinned lazily, his chubby cheeks jigglin’ a little. “After this stress, I should eat something.” He drew fingers over his exposed belly. Hadn’t he started touchin’ it more often—almost as if he got his kicks outta it.
No, no, no! Don’t think like that!
“Wasn’t the plan that you stopped stuffin’ your face, partner?” Billy wanted to stall—he was a god-damned coward. Once he saw Robin gulpin’ down food like there was no tomorrow, all pretenses of holdin’ back would fly straight outta the window. “Ya sure it’s not the purple hag’s doin’?” He didn’t know if he had the power to stand up without his legs meltin’ in a puddle.
Robin crossed arms behind his back, the mass of his bulky arms and forearms pressin’ together. “Does it matter much? I mean, I am not sprouting a pigtail, right? I was worried B.B. was literal with her curse.” He glanced down at his belly. “I can get used to some flab.”
Billy’s small body clenched as he struggled to hold back a moan. Robin was already a damn-fine lady-killer—in that case, a bloke-killer. His awesome, broad shoulders led to beefy arms, as thick as tree trunks - as possible capable of tearin’ them outta the ground. A soft layer of flab—quiverin’ unless Robin flexed—bloated their size further. But if Billy dragged fingers over ‘em, he’d feel the packed bulk underneath. Those powerful monsters could—a hiss of pleasure pinned him to the bench—snap him in two. Robin’s muscles were top-notch, too: wider than his arms, shaped by constant bustin’ at the gym and the very act of carryin’ his bulk. They were veiny, ripped, and made the puny summer shorts stretch and ride up under the curve of Robin’s gut.
That lardy overhand attracted attention without fail. It was an enormous sphere of pure fat. The hidden muscles kept it in a firm, massive, fat ball. Robin still tugged the shirt around his oversize middle; the buttons ached and shook, hangin’ for their dear life. His poor shorts fared even worse, trapped between the titanic tights and the blobby belly, strained into a thin line of fabric. What if, while Robin was packin’ away food, it snapped in two, no longer survivin’ the pressure? Would he shrug it off and keep eatin’, too gluttonous to consider it? Would he glut himself, his pecs—round, sightly saggin’, the perfect ending touch to his appearance—wobblin’ at the fast movements?
“Hey! Are you coming?” Robin asked. He had turned his back towards Billy. The shirt rested well above his soft, squeezable love handles, which trembled with each step. His bloated ass cheeks pressed together, foldin’ as he walked. The shorts barely covered them—and if Robin kept feedin’ himself and expandin’, no clothing would fit him. When the threads snapped, and his body exploded outta them.
Billy’s mouth opened wide, and he stood up, followin’ their hypnotizin’ sway. It wouldn’t come to that, would it? Robin had more self-control, did he not? But he had no problem with growin’ fatter—and if his eager steps were an indication, he could even await it. Billy’s imagination quickly did its job, paintin’ a pic of Robin, who was eatin’ no longer with resignation but with cheer. He would adore the way his flab folded or his muscles swelled. He would rejoice more the less he could see under the dome of his girth, proudly lift even heavier barbells and dumbbells and eat his weight in food.
“Come, or you’ll miss everything!” Robin shouted from the hall, turnin’ so fast that ripples spread through the entire mass of his engorged gut.
“I’m comin’, partner!” With an uneasy waddle, Billy followed him. Had he found out? Could he? As if he was a mutt with a yanked chain, the blond rushed down to the canteen. His brain could wait. Robin was right; Billy needed to see every second of that show.
---
Billy’s legs dragged him towards the canteen sluggishly, weakly. He hesitated at every step, pulled back, and then minced forward. What if someone saw him? He had to scram as fast as possible, get far from the dinin’ room. His dick was throbbin’ in his pants—and they were so tight that the whole Chaldea musta noticed. Hot sweat soaked him to the bone: anxiety, arousal, and anticipation. He had clenched his hands and mustered whatever willpower was left to him. “I’m not beatin’ it in the halls,” he murmured in the lonely corridor. “No matter how much I’m burnin’, no matter if it’ll drive me insane, no matter that Robin’s embraced piggin’ out and when I enter the canteen, I’ll find him stuffin’ himself sick.” Each second was painfully long-drawn torture as the twitches of pleasure set him ablaze.
“Can you walk faster, please? You partner”—the voice was so heavy with sarcasm that Billy could see it drippin’—“is inside and has already begun. If you arrive too late, he will have finished.”
“EMIYA!” Billy crouched in his shootin’ position. The tight pants rubbed his sensitive cock, and he felt himself edgin’ closer to release. He tried to hide the dick with his hands but brushed its tender head. “You’ve got a lotta courage,” he tried to push away that shameless joy, “showin’ up before my eyes.”
“Keep the rage for later. The curse would have failed if he did not enjoy it.” The unfazed Archer passed by him. Then, he stopped, glanced around shiftily, and turned back. “And you don’t have to thank me for this. Honestly. The grand plan was someone else’s.”
“I’m gonna give you all the gratitude you deserve, no worries!” Billy reached for his gun, but EMIYA slipped past him and disappeared.
He coulda chased the Archer, but there were more pressing things.
With the red vermin gone, Billy opened the doors and entered the canteen. He moved through empty chairs. The lively hall was now ghastly empty, not a sound to distract him.
Only one table was occupied—or, more accurately, three tables put together as a one. There was no other way the oversize feast woulda fitted. Potatoes, dazzlin’ with melted butter; meats with sauce as thick as syrup; mountains of golden, crispy fried rice—those were a few of the dishes, reversed for the special guest. And he was wolfin’ down a huge plate of appetizers along with a large bottle of soda to keep him company, the same ol’ grin plastered on his face. “Hey, partner!” he spoke, his mouth full. “I would say that you can pick whatever you like, but, uh, I have the feeling this is all for me.”
The flame of passion erupted into Billy. He bit his lips, and his hand reached for his cock, stroking it through the pants. It brought some short-lived relief, but then it rose higher—like a wave which would drown him if he stopped. “S-so,” he hoped to move the topic to anything else, “you were serious ‘bout enjoyin’ the curse, partner?”
The enormous gulp traveled down Robin’s throat. “How does it look to you?” He polished away the last few bites and set the plate on a pile of empty ones. When did he have the time? Billy had come ten minutes after him! How fast was Robin gorgin’ himself?
“If the red Archer will be my chef, I might get a use out of him.” Robin moved onto a juiced steak with bewitchin’ aroma and dug straight in, lickin’ the splotches of grease that stained his lips. “It’s not a weak start, but I bet I can do better. There’s a lot more to eat, after all. Do you want to watch?”
If Billy had any sense left, he should have realized the so clear teasin’. But he could only think about Robin’s huge body, about his gut and ass and bottomless hunger. Squirmin’, he nodded.
“Then you can sit here.” Robin patted the space on the bench near himself. “It might be a little tight, but a small guy like you can fit.”
Small. As if in a trance, Billy walked and plopped down, squeezin’ his body as close as possible to Robin’s flab. His left side was sinkin’ in the lard, feelin’ the warmth which the oversize Archer radiated. Those temptin’ rolls bulged over the smaller man, spillin’ over his lithe frame. He was like a mouse next to the engorged mountain that was Robin. “When did ya began enjoyin’ it, partner? Didn’t ya say ya will be stayin’ fit ‘n’ trim?” His hand hadn’t stopped runnin’ over his cock; how the hell had Robin not noticed?
“No, I did not want to be a pig. I thought B.B. would make me a large pink animal, but it seems she hadn’t been literal. Besides”—Robin stopped his feast to grip his flexed biceps, stretchin’ his fingers to fit around it—“this is quite far from a fat pig. I would have ended this earlier, but I had fun playing with you.
“You… On purpose?” Billy couldn’t bear it anymore.
“Why else? Did you think someone missed the way you were staring at me?”
It was as if a bomb had exploded in Billy’s chest. He shoulda been ashamed, distraught that his dirty secret was out in the open. But instead, he felt bliss, utter and true bliss. Robin was on the same page. Robin was on the same page! “Then, partner… Can I?” He was tremblin’, barely able to speak.
“Do whatever you want. You’ve earned it.”
Billy jumped onto him, perchin’ himself atop the blobby gut. His face leaned forward, and he kissed Robin’s revealed moobs. He pressed his lips over the pecs. His face was enveloped in the soft chub, and his tongue caressed them from the perky nipples and up the curve, glidin’ over the muscle underneath.
He began grindin’ against Robin’s belly. The flab engulfed his cock. As Billy thrust into it, his dick not penetratin’ deep enough to fell the muscle, it shook around. Those jiggles made him throb with pleasure, arch his back, and squeeze—squeeze all he could.
Robin’s huge arms were the nearest. Billy’s hands slid over them, feelin’ the muscle ripple. The veins shifted with each movement and… Was Robin still stuffin’ himself?
The fat sphere pushed out, givin’ in less and less. Robin’s gut was growin’, fillin’ up with food, and he was bound to end even flabbier; even bigger—so impossibly enormous that Billy would be but a speck next to him. He’d be so tiny next to that solid wall of flab and flesh and beef!
Jizz soaked Billy’s underpants. The relief—the final relief—crashed over him like a wave and let out an unabashed moan in Robin’s chest. His warm, frantic pantin’ made the skin tingle.
And he rose his head, and his red, messy, wild smirk met a proud grin.
“For such a small guy, you’re pretty intense,” Robin said. He was breathing heavily, his belly pushing in and out. “Do you think you can handle a round number two?”
The blond, ruffled outlaw nodded, his body movin’ before his brain had a chance to react. “You betcha, partner!”
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Growl: Chapter 9
Warning: This chapter includes sensitive themes such as language, violence, drugging, and sexual assault (nothing too extreme though). Read with caution.
Tag List: @theravencawsatmidnight @etroman @kaariqueen
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Your P.O.V
I made my way through the halls to get to my next class, all day I couldn't stop thinking about yesterday. I spent the entire day with Kyotani, it really was like we were on a date, even though we're both just friends. I hated to think of it like that, but it was the truth. And it would stay the truth until I finally confess, which is very unlikely. I already made things awkward enough last night at the restaurant. I can't believe I told some random stranger that we were "dating". God, why did I do that? I'll have to apologize to Kyotani later. Just as I turned the corner to walk down the last hall before my class, I heard someone calling my name.
"Hey, L/n!" I stopped dead in my tracks and grimaced. And just when I was in a pretty good mood too. Not bothering to turn around, I respond. "Not in the mood today Chiharu. So save me the effort of wasting my time and fuck right off." I say before I continue walking. "Oh really? That's pretty bitchy of you L/n, walking away before I could introduce my friends to you."
"What friends? You mean more of Oikawa's annoying ass group of fan..." I trail off as I turned around. Instead of girls at Chiharu's side, there were tall buff guys. They looked liked third years. "Wow Chiharu, totally didn't figure you as the type to date more than one guy at a time." I smirked. Chiharu returned the smug grin. "Can't say the same for you though, huh? I saw you hanging out with that freak that came to your rescue yesterday. I bet Oikawa wouldn't be too happy to hear you were with another man." Before I could remind her for the hundredth time that me and Oikawa were not in a relationship, she continued.
"I mean, whoring yourself out to every guy you meet is bad enough. But going so low as to date someone like that freak? Ha! Now that's just pathetic! Didn't know you needed attention that badly!" I felt a vein pop in my head. I could care less if she made fun of me, but she brought Kyotani into it. He's done nothing wrong. She had no right to talk about him like that. I stormed over to her and grabbed her by her shirt collar. "Listen here bitch! Keep Kyotani's name out of your mouth or I'll-"
"You'll what!? You won't do shit! And besides, I'm not here to fight you. Like I said before, I wanted to introduce my friends." Chiharu snapped her fingers, and two of the third years grabbed onto my arms and pulled me away from her. I was going to scream, but the third one covered my mouth before I got the chance. "Come on, I think it's time we teach this one a lesson." With that, the third year that was keeping me quite, knocked me out cold.
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"Ugh...What...What happened?" I groan before slowly opening my eyes. My head was pounding, and I felt dizzy. My vision finally adjusted and I could tell just were I was. I was behind the school near the dumpsters. Why was I hear and...why can't I move!? It was then I noticed my hands were tied together behind my back. All at once it hit me. Chiharu, the third years, she had them knock me out. My breathing picked up rapidly. Why? What were they going to do? I managed to sit myself up, if I could just stand, I can run back inside the school and call for help. But I couldn't, I was so dizzy, it made standing was difficult. I felt something warm hit my knee, blood. I felt it run down my cheek this time, my head must have been bleeding.
"Come on!" I say to myself, attempting to stand once again, but again I couldn't bring myself to stand, I could hardly sit up straight. A hit to the head wouldn't do all this. "They must have drugged me..." I say breathlessly. "Right we did, sweet cheeks." I gasp and look up to see the three third years from before towering over me. "W-what do you want from me? Did that bitch tell you to do this?" I ask, glaring up at the three. "Oh, she's smart. I like em smart." Siad one of the three. "I prefer them more dumb honestly. But she'll do." Said another. "Yeah, Chiharu told us to do this. But really, we would have done it sooner." The one talking to me crouches down to my height.
He looks me up and down, practically undressing me with his eyes. It felt disgusting. "You're pretty cute. How have we not met you before?" He asks. I make sure my legs were firmly pressed together and close to my body. "I prefer to keep to myself so I don't meet people like Chiharu or you scumbags. Now let me go!" I demand. The guy in front of me chuckles. "Sorry, but no. We ain't going anywhere, anytime soon, princess." He moved his finger down my leg. I kicked at his shin roughly, making him groan in pain. The other two third years laughed at his pain.
"Damn, Chiharu was right. You are a bitch." Suddenly his hand was around my throat. He slammed me back down to the ground, hovering over me. "Hey! Make sure you leave some fun for us!" One of them called. "Shut it. There's plenty of her to go around." Says the one on top of me. his free hand tugged at my uniform's tie, loosening my blazer. "No! Stop! Stop it!" I cried.
"See, I knew you didn't give her enough. She's still bitching and moaning." One of the two said, referring to what I only assumed was the drug they slipped me while I was unconscious. "Who cares? No one's gonna hear her." I yelled and cried, but like he said, no one would hear. "Would shut up already!? I promise you'll enjoy it." The guy on top of me purred into my ear. "W-why? Why are you doing this?" I managed to croak out between sniffles.
"Chiharu figured you needed to be taught a lesson. If you want multiple guys, then that's just what you'll get." I sobbed and shut my eyes tightly. 'Someone please help me...' I whimpered in my mind. Just as the man's hand began to go up my skirt, a loud cracking noise filled my ears. Soon after was a cry of pain. My eyes shot opened when I felt the man's grip on my throat loosen. "What the fuck!?" He yelled. Another cracking sound and a cry of pain, then fast approaching footsteps, and before I knew it, the weight of the guy on top of me was gone.
From what I could see, my tears blurring my vision slightly, was someone grabbing the guy and punching him multiple times in the face before kneeing him in the gut and throwing him aside. The person who saved me walked over to the guy's limp body and kicked at it, yelling out in fury while doing so. That yelling closely resembled a man's yells.
After a few more seconds, the person hurried to my side and sat me up. Now that he was closer in view, I could make out who he was. "...Kyotani?" I whimper. "Y/n...I'm sorry I got here late..." He muttered before holding me in his arms tightly. "I'm so sorry." The dizziness that filled my mind had finally gotten the better of me, and once again I fell unconscious.
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I woke up again sometime after that, there was something soft underneath my body, and something warm on top. I slowly opened my eyes, narrowing them momentarily due to the brightness of wherever I was. After a minute my eyes adjusted, I was in a room this time. Not just any room, Kyotani's room. "Kyotani." I breathed. Memories of what just happened replayed in my mind, tears begin to fill my eyes. Kyotani saved me. If it wasn't for him, I might have been...I felt sick just thinking about it. I didn't want to think about it. I just wanted Kyotani. Where was Kyotani? "Kyotani..."I whimpered pathetically. From the other side of his bedroom door, I could hear his voice. It was feint, but I could just barely make out what he was saying.
"...She's not coming today, neither am I......Look I'll explain everything later just trust me ok?....Alright, see ya." After a few seconds Kyotani entered, his expression brightening when he saw me. "You're awake!" He rushed to my side. "Are you-Did they-what happend?" He fumbled over his words. I didn't respond, I just stared at him. He's done so much for me. He became my friend when he didn't have to, he helped me study when no one else would, and now he's saved me from a very horrible situation. I rose my shaky hand and gently pressed it to his cheek. "Kyotani...thank you. Thank you so much." I say weakly.
Kyotani put his hand on top of mine. "It was nothing. Y/n, what...tell me what happened. Who were those assholes?" Kyotani asked, repressing the anger in his tone. I removed my hand and turned my head away from him, not wanting him to see me cry. "Y/n?" Kyotani speaks softly. "I really don't want to talk about that right now." I tell him as calmly as possible. I felt Kyotani's thumb gentle wipe away a stray tear on my cheek. "Ok. you don't have to right now. How are you feeling?" He asked. I only shrug, still not look at him. In honesty, I was better. That damned drug wore off, my head was a lot clearer.
I felt something press down at the foot of Kyotani's bed, I glance down to see Killer. His ears were flat against his head and he was whimpering while pawing at my leg. I smile sadly. "Aw, it's ok boy. I'm ok now." I say gently. Kyotani pet killer's head a few times. "He went crazy when he saw me carry you in here. I'm glad my mom and sister weren't here to see it. They would have started pestering me." I glanced over at him. "Asking why I'm carrying an unconscious girl into the house, then having to explain what I just had to fucking see..." His hand moved away from Killer's head, and covered his eyes. He was shaking. I sat up and wrapped my arms around him. "You don't have to talk about it either." I say softly.
His arms found their way around my waist. "Right..." I sniffled. We both sat in silence, just enjoying being in each others embrace. After a moment or two, I finally spoke. "Who were you on the phone with?" I asked. "Iwaizumi. He wanted to know why we didn't show up to practice." I shifted my position to get more comfortable. Kyotani picked this up and laid me back down on the bed before crawling in next to me. He draped his arm over me and I laid my head on his chest. "I won't say a word about this to him or anyone, until you're ready. Until then, I'll be here for you ok?" I nod and close my eyes, breathing in Kyotani's scent. He was so warm. "Thank you Kyotani."
"This will be selfish of me to ask but, can I stay here with you tonight? I don't want to be alone right now." Kyotani rubbed my back softly. "Of course you can." I thanked him again before texting my mother, letting her know I'll be staying with Iwaizumi. I wouldn't have lied but my mom trusted him the most. 'Hope you don't mind Iwaizumi.' I set my phone aside and snuggled closer to Kyotani.
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Faking It Chapter 1
Rowaelin Fake Dating High School Au
A/N: This is going to be told through Aelin and Rowan’s POV’s but will also feature other characters. 
masterlist
Aelin Galathynius had never been this pissed off in her entire life. 
“I need to focus on myself.” 
“You can be a lot to handle sometimes.” 
If Aelin hadn't been so shellshocked she most definitely would've slapped that grimace off his ruggedly handsome face. Chaol Westfall and her had been dating for as long as Aelin could remember. Grade six graduation, he was there. Grade eight dance marathon, him again. First day of high school, Chaol. Junior prom night, guess fucking who. 
Now, she was barely a week into senior year and everything was already going to shit. It’s not that she was completely torn up about the breakup - she wasn't - it was more about her pride. Aelin’s bitchy side could not believe that she hadn't been the one to dump him first. They’d barely spoken to each other all summer long. Aelin had been lifeguarding at a pool on the south side of town and Chaol had been a camp counsellor on the north. Still, their friend groups crossed over in every way possible. Aelin was the head cheerleader, leader of about every committee you could think of, and as Aedion liked to call her, “Queen of Terrasen High”. Chaol was, you guessed it, the football team captain and starting quarter back. They were the textbook couple in every way possible. Still, despite the cheerleaders and football players hanging out nearly every night, Chaol and Aelin had barely talked. It had been that way since their huge fight on the last day of junior year. They’d claimed to forgive each other, but never really had. They’d both said some really fucked up shit. Still, Aelin couldn't bring herself to be completely regretful of what she’d said to him. 
“This is a good thing A.” Her best friend Lysandra was saying beside her. “You’re way hotter than him anyway.” 
Snapping back to attention, Aelin smiled. “I am aren't I.” She laughed. 
“Hell yes.” Lysandra assured her. “He was never in your league.” 
Aelin laughed and threw her arm over her best friends shoulders. School was out for the day and they were heading out to meet Aedion for a drive home. Ignoring the faint anger in her gut, Aelin had to admit she felt more free. She hadn't been single since the sixth grade - save the small break her and Chaol had taken in 10th year. Aelin didn't like to ponder too much on that time in her life. 
A blast of warm air hit her as they pushed open the heavy doors to the school. Aedion’s face broke into a wide grin as he spotted them. As soon as her and Lysandra reached him he pulled her into a bear hug. “Welcome to the world of miserable and lonely single people. You’re gonna love it.” He messed with her hair and she groaned for him to put her down. 
“How the hell do you know already?” She asked.
“Oh my sweet naive cousin. Everyone knows.” He smiled sympathetically. 
“Everyone?” Aelin said, a hint of desperation in her tone.
“Everyone.” Aedion echoed. “It’s the biggest news to hit the school since, well, you and Chaol took break.”
Aelin swore under her breath. “Can’t people focus on their own lives for once.” 
Lysandra laughed softly. “We need to find you a rebound.” She said, bouncing on her toes. “I finally get the chance to be my best friends wingman.” 
“I don't want a rebound.” Aelin said frowning. 
“Would you rather Chaol find one first. He broke up with you, you’re already losing.” 
Damn Lysandra. She knew that Aelin was probably the most competitive person alive and could literally never shy away from a fight. 
“Fine. Who?” She swung open the door to Aedion’s car and climbed in the back.
Lysandra clapped her hands together and joined her in the back. “How about Fenrys Moonbeam?” 
Aelin shook her head back and forth. “No way.”
“Why?” Aedion asked. “He’s unfairly attractive.” 
“You date him then.” Aelin shot back. 
“Maybe I will.” He smiled wickedly at her in the rearview mirror and pulled out of the parking lot. 
“How about Sam Cortland.” Lys suggested. 
For a moment Aelin considered it. Despite being a year younger than her, Sam was extremely cute. His messy brown hair and constant smile didn't hurt matters. 
“Too nice.” Aelin insisted. “I’ll feel too bad about using him.” 
Lysandra had just begun naming someone else when their car slammed into something else. Aelin’s body lurched forward uncontrollably, head slamming into the seat in front of her. 
“Fuck!” Aedion swore. “Fucking hell!”
Aelin didn't even have time to revel in the fact that Aedion had actually cursed. Instead, she surveyed her body to make sure she was alright. Lysandra appeared to be doing the same and they both exchanged weak smiles of comfort. All three of them slowly got out of the car to see who exactly they had run into. 
Aelin was stilling rubbing at her temples when a voice sent a chill down her spine. 
“Are you fucking kidding me Ashryver?” He said. 
Heart racing, Aelin lifted her head slowly and met the anger filled green eyes of Rowan Whitethorn. He looked absolutely flawless in his leather jacket and white tee. His too tight jeans were ripped around the knees and cuffed just above his black combat boots. Rowan’s silver hair was messy and unkept and his tattoo was just as beautiful as ever. The vibrant green of his eyes never failed to take her off guard. Eyes that were now staring directly at her. 
He blinked twice, the only reaction he would show, and went back to yelling at her cousin. 
“I’m sorry man.” Aedion was saying in the background. “I didn't see you.” 
“It’s not his fault.” Lysandra jumped in. “We were all distracted.” 
“Let me guess.” He snarled back, tone as pissed off as ever. “Discussing the recent breakup.” Rowan was looking at Aelin now, waiting for a response. 
“Something like that.” She mumbled, not looking directly at him. 
“Didn't hear that princess.” He said loudly.
“Fuck off Rowan.” Aedion yelled, subtly stepping between them. “It was accident, send me the bill for your bumper. We’re going now.” 
“Whatever.” Rowan didn’t look at her once. He only got back in his dented black car, flipped Aedion off, and hit the gas. 
“Come on A.” Lysandra said softly, wrapping an arm around Aelin’s trembling form. She pulled her gently back toward their car. Aelin could feel Aedion’s gaze on her, yet for some reason she couldn't bring herself to care. 
After a few more minutes of silent and awkward driving, Aelin couldn't bear it anymore. 
“I’m fine guys.” She said with as much confidence as she could muster. “Please stop looking at me like I'm a time bomb.” 
Lysandra laughed and smiled. “Whatever you say A.” Aelin had never been this grateful for her best friend. 
“How about Rowan.” Lysandra continued. Every thought left Aelin’s head and she jolted upwards in her seat. 
“Are you insane? Are you literally fucking mental. I would get burned alive then have a conversation with him.” Aelin was practically yelling now. 
Lysandra only shrugged. “What’s the one thing that hurts more than sleeping with the best friend?” She asked Aedion. 
“Sleeping with the guy you told him not to worry about.” Her cousin recited, smirking in the rearview mirror. 
“Absolutely not. No way in hell.” She paused. “Besides, he wouldn't even give me the time of day.”
Lys squealed. “So you’re considering it.”
“No.” Aelin murmured, ignoring her friend’s pointed glares. 
“Alright.” Lysandra finally relented. “Just think on it.” 
“Fine.” Aelin nodded, and went back to staring at nothing through the car window. 
                                                     ~~~~~~~~
“Lorcan!” Rowan yelled out. “Where are you guys?” 
“Out back.” Came the booming yell of Lorcan Salvaterre. 
Sighing, Rowan put his coat back on and walked through the house to the back door. Only, Fenrys greeted him, patting him on the back and moving over on the couch. “How was your day?” His friend asked. 
“Horrible.” Rowan admitted. 
Fenrys stuck out his bottom lip. “How come?” 
“I talked to Aelin Galathynius.” 
The rest of the group instantly stopped whatever conversations they’d been having and whirled towards him. Fenrys’ eyes were blown wide open as he struggled to find the words. 
“Explain.” Lorcan said at last, falling back in his chair. Vaughn and Gavriel were staring at him cautiously, as if he might have another breakdown.  “Her cousin hit my car.” He grumbled. 
“The first time you speak to Aelin in nearly two years is because you crashed into her car” Vaughn reiterates. 
Rowan only nods. Fenrys, bless him, somehow restrains from laughing. 
“So do tell.” Gavriel gestures for Rowan to go into more detail. 
“I made some comment about the breakup, she refused to look at me, I basically mocked and condescended her, and then Aedion told me to fuck off and I left.” He reached down into the cooler for a drink. 
“Um wow.” Lorcan sighed. “Nice going asshole.” 
Rowan just held his beer out in salute and took a long drink. He was more than ready to forget about the whole day and move on. Unfortunately, his friends seemed less inclined for his plan. 
“The news of their breakup is all over the school.” Fenrys told them. He had always been their number one source of gossip, considering the rest of them despised most social interaction. “Guys are already placing bets on who can sleep with her first. Cairn bet Nox 1000$ he can nail her by Dorian’s party this Friday.” 
Rowan tried and failed to ignore the tightening in his chest. 
“Will she even go to that?” Gavriel posed. “Dorian is Chaol’s best friend anyway.”
“She’ll be there.” Rowan blurted before he could take it back.
All eyes again flipped to him. “Why don’t you make a move Rowan?” Lorcan asked, a smirk etched onto his lips. 
“Fuck off Salvaterre. I hate the bitch.” Rowan snarled. 
“You didn't seem to hate her so much when - “ Fenrys began. 
Rowan was already up and moving before he could hear the end of the sentence. He ignored their calls of apology and to come back, instead getting into his car and pulling out. At last, he pulled into the parking space in front of his aunt’s house and leaned his head against the car window. 
It had barely been a week and his senior year was already shaping up to be a fucking mess. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Text
Lost
Harry Potter AU 
Request Fic
Summary:  Regulus did everything he could to ruin his friendship with you. He turned cold, insensitive, and cruel. Now the two of you are paired up for a potions project. Old feelings and wounds are bound to open again. Regulus has to learn to accept that "mudbloods" aren't bad and loving one isn't wrong. Will he be willing to let go of his family's ideals or lose you forever?
Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader 
Rating: M- angst 
Song at the beginning: The Suffering by  Song by Coheed and Cambria
_______
Is there word or right to say Even in this old-fashioned way? Go make your move girl. I'm not coming home. Would things have changed if I could've stayed? Would you have loved me either way? Dressed to the blues Day to day with my collar up. Decision sits so make it quick A breath inhaled from an air so sick I cursed the day that I'd learned Of the web you span You had your hold till bleeding If it was up to me I would've figured you out Way before the year clocked out Oh, I hope you're waiting I hope you're waiting
People change and hurt people hurt other people in return…
That sentence summed up so many things in your life at the moment. Your eyes turned to the Slytherin table where Regulus Black sat with his friends. The boy that you had a crush on since 1st year changed and not in a good way. He had gone from being somewhat kind to downright vicious. After he started making closer friends with Evan Rosier, a few years before Regulus had turned further into his “pure blood nature.” The last thing that he wanted was a “mudblood” like you for a friend. Hearing those words leave his mouth still hurt you to this day and that had been over two years ago. Why you let it both you, you weren’t sure. You were just Lily Evan’s mudblood little sister...nothing impressive (his words, not yours).
You frowned, scowling at Evan Rosier. He sat telling some animated story that had Regulus, Snape, and Barty Crouch Jr laughing. Evan was a topic of rage for you. If Evan hadn’t stuck his nose in your friendship with Regulus then there was a possibility that the two of you would have remained friends to this day.
Screw Evan and everything that he stands for!
It was Snape that looked in your direction. He gave you a polite smile before looking back to his friends. He was the one boy at that table that was kind to you. Granted it had to do with his insane crush on your sister but he was still nice all the same. Now that Lily wouldn’t talk to him after him calling her a mudblood, he used you to get information on Lily. “How is Lily?” “Is she doing okay? What about you?” (Those were Snape’s big questions (when his Slytherin buddies weren’t around).
That whole little table would shit a monkey if they knew that Regulus and I were sleeping together....then.
You thought with a cold glare. Sex was all that there was to it. Regulus liked to play rough and you were glad to go along with it. You were, after all in Regulus’ mind, the little Hufflepuff who he could easily manipulate into whatever he wanted. At first, it was just seeing what all of the hype was about. Was sex really as good as everyone went on about? In short, yes. It was exactly what everyone said and then some. Lovemaking turned into Regulus developing some major kinks.
You longed for the day when Regulus was a sweet quiet boy who enjoyed your company. Now he was something else and you couldn’t put your finger on it.
“My favorite hufflebuddy!”
Your thoughts were interrupted when Sirius plopped down beside you and pulled you into an overdramatic hug. Everything that Sirius did was overdramatic but you didn’t mind. He was getting you out of your head.
“And my favorite gigantic lapdog.”
You said with a smile earring a bigger grin from Sirius as James plopped down on your other side.
“Mini-red, you are looking a little gloomy this fine morning.”
You were used to Sirius and James calling you “mini-red.” It didn’t matter how many times that you told them that neither Lily nor yourself enjoyed being called big and mini-red it never stopped. You learned to accept it as some form of unusual endearment and roll with it.
“Sorry, I just have a lot on my mind with this potions class. Slughorn is going crazy.”
James looked thoughtful as he reached across the table for a cup of juice.
“Why do you think that I bailed out of positions as soon as I could? Lils seems to love him. From what I have heard he adores both Lily and yourself.”
You nodded.
“He does. He also adores Regulus.”
Sirius frowned
“Like my brother, Regulus?”
“How many others are there?”
You questioned. Sirius chuckled before his expression darkened.
“Watch out for him, Y/n. Just go with me on it.”
You couldn’t help but notice the expression on Sirius’ face went from jovial ready to prank someone to dark and depressed.
“What’s going on with him?”
You asked, cautiously. Sirius didn’t respond but instead, James did.
“Sirius believes that Regulus is now a death eater.”
“Believes? I know. I mean look at him! He looks like the perfect death eater. Plus all of his little friends are so why wouldn’t he join the crowd?”
James, Sirius, and yourself turned to look at Regulus who was staring at you three. You were afraid to look at him. The last thing that you wanted to do was meet his dark gaze. Since Regulus started changing you were scared of him. If he was a death eater, you would be someone on his list. Why would he want to be kind to a filthy mudblood?
(Meanwhile)
Regulus’ attention had turned to you when Sirius started hugging you like some kind of stuffed animal. Why that he cared so much he wasn't sure. Regulus didn’t even want to admit to himself that he cared for you. You were everything that his family trained him to despise. Yet here he was having some kind of weird fluttering feelings in his stomach when you were near. He hated you yet he wanted you...it made no sense.
“Why does she have to be so fucking beautiful?”
Regulus thought with a glare. He wanted nothing more than to walk across the great hall and shove you against the wall.
He didn’t want to admit to himself that he was jealous of Sirius’ friendship with you. Regulus was jealous of all the Marauders for their friendship with you. You were their little pet Hufflepuff when you were his first! He was the one that made love to you the first time. You were his lover and now Sirius seemed to be moving in on what was his.
“It’s your own fault that she got scared of you.”
Regulus’ mind supplied. He had taken extra steps to scare you away. Whether it be his unkind words or dark distant stares, you finally edged away. Regulus also didn’t want to admit that it was because he called you a stupid mudblood in front of all of his friends.
“Don’t think on it, Regulus.”
Regulus’ thoughts were interrupted by Snape’s voice. He looked up quickly.
“What are you talking about?”
He questioned. Snape motioned to you.
“Y/n Evans. You don’t need a companion Hufflepuff. I know that she was something to you a few years ago…”
“I was a stupid child. I don’t have any feelings for the mudblood girl. The same could be said about you and Y/n’s sister.”
Snape’s mouth formed a hard line. Regulus knew all about Snape and Lily’s friendship falling apart. He saw it happen.
“I’m not talking about myself. I am talking about you. We have enough duties to the dark lord to perform. If you were to be swayed by the girl, you would both be killed.”
Regulus scowled as he noticed your eyes flicker in his direction before quickly looking away. You were scared of him. Regulus wanted to be thrilled but at the same time, it was gut-wrenching. What Snape nor anyone else seemed to know was after Regulus ruined your friendship; he wrote you letters every day for three months. He sent letters and little gifts that would appeal to your quirky personality in hopes that he could win you back. You ignored everything.
He assumed that it was all for the best but it made the “gentle” side of Regulus sob in fury. What you didn’t know was you were the first person in his life that showed him any form of love. Seeing you shove his letter in the rubbish bin or deep into your bag with little to no expression on your face hurt him horribly!
Regulus swallowed back the rage and made a mental note that he needed to stop being so wishy-washy and focus on everything being for the best. There was no way that Regulus as a death eater could have a muggle-born girlfriend. It would be the biggest crock of shit known to wizardkind!
It's for the best…
Half an hour later you walked into Potions with a book in front of your face. You had been gleefully reading some romance book that Marlene McKinnon recommended to you. This was the closest that you would seemingly get to a healthy and not toxic relationship.
Sitting down you put the book up as Professor Slughorn stood up. He gave all of his favorite students his usual friendly good morning.
“Ms. Evans, you did a wonderful job on the last test. I can see that a wonderful brain is a quality with the Evans family.”
You smiled, happily as Professor Slughorn put your most recent test in front of you. Perfect score.
“I am assigning partners for our next project. I know that I typically let everyone pick partners but I think this time we will be doing something different. It's time to see how other people in the classroom work together.”
You internally muttered “uh oh” under your breath. For projects, you always teamed up with a Ravenclaw girl named Emilia Abbott. The two of you had made a common ground of helping each other keep perfect grades on Potions. Up until now, your plan worked like a charm.
“Okay, Mr. Black, I am putting you with Y/n Evans. The two of you have the highest grade in this class. I want to see what amazing things the two of you can do together.”
WHAT?!
You nearly shrieked the moment that Slughorn made that comment. Was it too late to drop potions? Would you really need this class after all? You could always take double potions next year, right?
After Slughorn paired everyone up, you didn't move to where Regulus was sitting. In fact, you didn’t even look in his direction. If he wanted to be your partner then he could get his ass up and come to you. Maybe he would magically forget who you were. Forget the fact that you spent a lot of time underneath him in the room of requirement with his hand on your ass.
What you didn’t see was Regulus staring at you with a frown on his face. He was waiting for you to get up. Instead, you didn’t move. You sat like a little statue staring dead ahead and trying to hide under your red hair.
Rolling his eyes, Regulus finally stood up. He walked across the room and sat down at the table that you were occupying. You didn’t look up nor meet his face.
“We do have to talk to each other, you know.”
Regulus commented. You finally met his eyes. The expression on your face was wary and your guard was up. No longer were you the happy girl that Regulus considered his Hufflepuff buddy. You weren’t the girl that went to him when someone was giving you a hard time or the girl who would try telling him a joke but giggle the whole time. Now you were silent.
“I suppose we do.”
You replied. Regulus had forgotten how much he missed your voice...your sweet gentle voice that was not loud but instead that remained even and soft even if you were mad.
“What potion do you want to do the report on?”
Regulus asked.
“I don’t know.”
You said, sounding almost lost. Since Regulus had sat down, you tried not to look at him. Your vision had gone from his green tie, to his hands, to his family ring, to his left arm. Was there a dark mark under this dress shirt? You couldn’t help but wonder if Sirius was right.
“Look, I am not going to fail this project because you are acting like a clueless tart.”
Your green eyes immediately met his. Regulus was waiting for you to cuss him out but he knew that it wouldn’t happen. He had barely heard you say the word “fuck.” It didn’t matter how much he tried to get you to step outside of your comfort zone, you wouldn’t say some words.
“What? Have something to say?”
He questioned. You quickly stood and gathered your books before storming out of the class without another word.
_______
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sweethugsandhoney · 4 years
Text
hanahaki disease pt 2
summary: hanahaki disease- a disease where the victim of unrequited or one sided love begins to vomit or cough up the petals and flowers of a flowering plant growing in their lungs. which will eventually grow large enough to render breathing impossible if left. it ends when the beloved returns their feelings or when the victim dies.
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pt 1 pt 2 pt 3 pt 4
the next day at work was horrible. i hadn’t slept the night before, too busy crying and mourning my own death. the surgery i was supposed to be researching about went completely out the window. whatever i’ll just ask dr. lee about it, i thought as the elevator doors opened, stepping out into the sixth floor. my heels clicked as i started walking to the entrance doors, already seeing jj, reid, and hotch from the glass doors.
i opened the doors and made my way to my desk, setting down my bag and taking a seat. “are you okay?”, i heard hotch’s voice say. i looked up to find three sets of eyes already on me. “yeah why?”, i lied through my teeth. i wasn’t fine but i couldn’t let any of them know, in exception for prentiss.
“well you always greet us in someway in the mornings when you come in”, jj replied with her arms crossed, leaning against spencer’s desk. i blinked as i averted my gaze, “yeah sorry, hi”, i said with the best smile i could muster up. fortunately they decided to drop the topic, but i didn’t miss the look they all exchanged. fuck, what is wrong with me. if i don’t want them to find out then i need to get better at hiding it.
the day so far had gone smoothly, we didn’t have any cases to go to and i hadn’t coughed anything up since this morning. my mood had gone up a little bit, the thought that i wouldn’t be able to do this again still lingering in the back of my mind. i blocked those thoughts out, hoping that if maybe i ignore it, the flower will disappear. i knew it wouldn’t happen though, either spencer develops feelings for me or i die. i exhaled a sigh at that thought.
i felt a vibration coming from my back pocket. i took it out to see that dr. lee was calling. we aren’t supposed to use phones while working, but i’m sure there could be an exception. i pressed on the ‘accept’ option and brought the phone to my ear. “y/n y/l/n speaking”.
“hi y/n, this is dr. lee. we got your test results back and it seems to be an urgent matter. is there any way you could come in right now?”, my heart started beating faster as my eyes moved to look at different things. “yeah of course”, i said quietly. i really am going to die. i hung up the phone and stayed still for a moment. trying to mentally prepare myself for what i already knew.
i stood up from my desk and made my way up the stairs to hotch’s office. i lightly knocked two times as i waited for him to look up from his work. “yes?”, he said, eyes trained on me. “i was wondering if i could get the rest of the day off, a last minute doctor’s appointment came up”, i said quietly stepping into his office.
“yeah, of course. is it something serious?”, he said putting his pen down. i opened my mouth to say something but i froze up. i didn’t want to lie to him but i didn’t want him to know either. “um not really it’s just something with my lungs”, i said averting my eyes to stare at my shoes. “well i hope you get better, you can take the day off”, he said, i looked up as he flashed me a smile. i said a quick ‘thank you’ and stepped out, making my way to my desk and gather my things
“where are you going?”, spencer said, eyes watching my figure put paperwork into my bag. “doctors appointment”, i said in a dismissive tone. i didn’t want him questioning me and getting things out of me. i would spill my guts to him in a second if he did as much as touched me. i truly hated myself for it, for falling in love with him and getting myself in this mess. i grabbed my bag and coat ready to go out, glancing at spencer. his eyebrows furrowed as he licked his lips.
i waved goodbye to him and turned my back, going out the doors and closer to facing reality. the closer i got to the hospital, the more i felt my anxiety grow. sitting in the waiting room with my knee rapidly bouncing, waiting for dr. lee. when i finally heard my name called, a nurse escorted me to one of the rooms they had in the back. minutes later dr. lee came in, the usual smile on his face gone.
“ms. y/n, we’ve ran some tests and took a look at your x-rays, which only confirms that you have a condition called hanahaki disease”, he said softly, a pitied look on his face. i stayed quiet as i licked my lips, not knowing what to say. i knew it all along, i prepared myself for the news, even started accepting the fact my death is around the corner, but it didn’t make it any better. hearing from a professional it is infact true, the sliver of hope i had crushed in an instant.
“i’ve done my research”, i said as i looked at my painted toes that you could see from my heels. “doctor, i have a question”, i said, voice strained as i desperately held back my tears. “i heard from someone that you can get it surgically removed, is that true?”, he nodded his head. “there is a downside however”, dr. lee started, taking a seat in one of the chairs in the room. of course there fucking is, life just keeps hitting me.
“if we succeed in getting the plant out of your lungs, the feelings for the person will go away too”, his eyes locked on mine, i chewed on my lip. “how serious has it become?”, he asked. i thought back to yesterday, the fully grown flowers i coughed up. “it’s full on flowers now”, i replied, picking at the skin around my fingers. dr. lee sighed as he thought about what he was going to say next.
“in my professional opinion, i suggest you wait to get the surgery. there’s always the possibility that the person can like you back”, dr. lee said after a second of thinking, i nodded my head. if he thinks that i should wait then it’s probably for the best, but i don’t think spencer will ever reciprocate. “here, i want you to have this”, dr. lee said as he handed me some papers in a manila folder.
i opened it to see a life support form, they wanted to know who they should call in case i fall into a coma or anything of the sort. under that paper was a copy of my x-ray scans. i stared at my scans, finding it surreal i had a plant in my lungs. how was it even surviving in there? this makes no fucking sense, it feels like a dream. “is that all?”, i asked politely, wondering if i was free to go. “yes, that’s all”, he said standing up too.
he opened the door for me and walked me out of the back area. “oh actually, there is something else”, he started, i turned my head to look at him. “please take your iron pills, your anemia got worse”, i looked down sheepishly, embarrassed i got caught not taking my meds. i nodded my head and said ‘okay doctor’. the drive home was quiet, the radio turned off. i didn’t feel like doing anything but sitting down and cry.
once i got home, the tears started flowing down my cheeks. i sat down on my floor, grabbing one of the couch cushions and hugging it to my chest. i buried my face in it as i sobbed. i couldn’t find the exact reason to why i was crying. was it because i might die? because spencer doesn’t love me in the way that i want and need him to? i’m not sure, i just knew that i was hurting.
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abuskinswarrior · 4 years
Text
Love Letter
So I read Read Between the Lines and it inspired me to write something similar.
Summary: The Reader writes her feelings down in a letter to hopefully get rid of her feelings towards Spencer.
Spencer x Reader
Fluff and Angst (a little, but not really)
Word Count: 2447
You know how they say write your feelings down then burn it. It’s supposed to symbolize you ‘“letting go of the feeling”. It’s usually for people that harbour anger, but I guess I could try it for love. So here goes I guess.
I don’t know why I’m so nervous to even write my feelings. I know you will never see this, but writing it makes it seem real I guess. Before I could just pretend I don’t feel this way, but it’s eating at me slowly chipping away pieces of me.
When I first met you, I thought you were cute and dorky. I liked the way you spouted out facts. You taught me so much about everything and I was amazed that it was only a fraction of what you knew. It was the start of one of the best friendships I have ever had. I think the moment I started thinking of you in a more romantic way was funnily enough Friday the 13 in October. Almost a year after I joined. It was a bad day for me. The words on the paper weren’t making any sense and when you talked to me I could only understand half of what you were saying. You noticed and you spoke slower for me. I don’t even think you remembered doing it. I was so extremely thankful and I brought you coffee for like a week after. It’s been so long since that and I thought I would get over it. We work together, we couldn’t date. But my love for you just kept growing.
I finally admitted that my schoolgirl crush on you was more than that when you invited me over to watch the newest season of Doctor Who. I told you I had never actually watched  an episode, you just shrugged and said we could do something else. I thought you were going to ask Penelope instead, but you wanted to spend time with me! (Outside of work!) I dressed up for it., stupid I know. I decided to wear a sundress because it had been so nice and you told me that your AC wasn’t working properly. I remember falling asleep on your couch and when I woke up you were still next to me watching Doctor Who. My head in your lap as you played with my hair. Again, I don’t even think you noticed. 
Emily picked up on my mood around you and confronted me, which is mainly why I am writing this letter. She’s gonna help me burn this. It’s hard though. I  know you will never feel the same way about me and I feel ridiculous. Sometimes it physically hurts to be near you. You make me nervous, you take my breath away and, god, you don’t even try.
I have fallen in love with all the things you do. You stick your tongue out when you’re thinking. When you spin around in the chairs when you can’t concentrate. The way you smile when JJ brings Henry  to the office. You bring me so much joy and it hurts that you don’t look at me the same way. I don’t know what I would do if you weren’t in my life. 
Do you remember when the group went out for drinks after that really hard case a few years ago? I went to the bar to get another pitcher for the table and some random guy asked if I wanted to go home with him. He wouldn’t take no for an answer and that’s when you came. I had never seen you like that before. When you asked me if I was okay and I couldn’t move. I was replaying that moment in my head. It was sooo sexy.
This isn’t the first time I was going to tell you. The first time I finally had the guts, I went to your place and you told me you were just about to come over to mine. I smiled so hard my cheeks hurt. You said you wanted to tell me something and I let you go first. Sometimes I wish I went first, but I’m glad I didn’t. That was when you told me about Maeve. My heart broke. I could feel my eyes tearing up, but the way you talked about her, god, I could never compare. And then she died. When JJ told me, for a fraction I was happy. It lasted for less than a second and I felt like such a horrible person. How could I even think about being happy? When you came back to work, I had to take a week off. I couldn’t even look at you because of the thought I had for a fraction of a second. That’s when I decided I was never going to tell you, but now I can’t even be near you and I have to leave.
I haven’t even said the three words this whole letter is for. It’s so hard. I think I’ve been denying it for so long that my hand doesn’t even want to write it. But I have to.
I                          love                             you
There I said it. I love you. Oh my god I love you so much. I love you so much I have to leave because if I stay, I don’t know what will happen. I want you to look at me the way you looked when you talked about her.
I think I’ll miss your eyes. The way they light up when you’re excited. I’ll miss your smile. I’ll miss the way your hand feels in mine. I’ll miss the way you engulf me when we hug. I can’t stay here anymore because I, fuck, I gave you pieces of my heart, slowly and now it’s in your hands and I can’t be there to watch you break it. 
I have to stop giving you pieces of me. At one point, you started taking them and I let you, but it ends now. I hope you find someone that makes you happy.
I sighed. “I think I’m done.” I looked up at Emily. We were desk partners. The other people in the office were out on their lunch break leaving just us. She looked up from her papers and smiled softly.
“How do you feel?” She looked down at the paper then back at me. I knew she wanted to read it and I just didn’t care at this point I guess. I handed it to her.
“Worse if that’s possible.” She read through it, mouthing the words.
“Y/n, you should tell him. I thought that you maybe had, like, a crush on the guy, not this!” Emily read it again, my natural cursive being a little hard to read. “Before Maeve? Really?” 
I smiled sheepishly and put my head down. “I know. That’s why I can’t say anything. He’ll hate me. Besides, it’s not like I’ll be around much anyway.”
“Woah, hey, you can’t leave.”
“Who’s leaving?” My head shot up as Derek walked into the office, back from lunch.
“Nobody, it’s nothing.” I said. Derek looked between me and Emily. Emily folded the paper, covering the front, leaving the back of the paper still accessible as she tried shuffling it between case files.
“Woah, what’s this?” He grabbed the paper out of her hands. Reading it out loud.
“Morgan, stop.” I got up trying to grab the paper.
“When I first met you, I thought you were cute and dorky. I liked the way you spouted out facts. You taught me so much about everything and I was amazed that it was only a fraction of what you knew.” He moved around me laughing. “Did you write this? Who’s this for?”
“It’s none of your business.” Just when I thought I had grabbed it, It slipped out of his hand.
“What’s this?” I looked over at who had grabbed it, the paper had refolded and it was in the hands of the one person who really should not have it.
“It’s nothing.” I reached for it again, but Spencer read the back. Being short sucked sometimes. I jumped reaching for it again. 
“Did you write a love letter?” He read it fairly quickly, no surprise. “It’s been speculated that writing love letters helps the nervous system pattern in the brain, appearing to exert protective effects throughout the body, including on the brain itself.” Spencer had stopped looking at it.
“That’s great, can I have it back?” I looked at him, my palm open. He looked between me and whoever was beside me. 
“Open it, pretty boy.” Derek shouted. Whatever he was going to say was muffled by Emily who had covered his mouth.
“Morgan, stop.” I heard her say. Spencer however, started opening the letter and I grabbed onto his arm, jumping up and snatching it, stuffing in my shirt in between breasts.
“Now, you gonna grab it? Cause I will file for harassment.” I looked at him. He smiled at me, a devious look in his eyes.
“Oh my god, I love you so much. I love you so much I have to leave because if I stay,” He used a higher pitched voice, mimicking me. My breath caught in my chest. I wanted to leave, I wanted to smack him, but I just stood there as he repeated what I wrote, mocking me. “I don’t know what will happen. I want you to look at me the way you looked when you talked about her.” He brought his hands up to his face. “I think I’ll miss your eyes.” He looked at me still smiling, laughing, with Morgan egging him on. I could hear both their laughs. 
“What’s going on?” I heard JJ’s voice from behind me. She put her hand on my shoulder, looking at my face. She could tell something was happening, but didn’t know what.
“JJ listen to this!” Spencer kept going. 
“Don’t,” I whispered as he continued to speak. “Please.” JJ looked between my face and Spencer, the wheels in her brain turning.
“I’ll miss the way your hand feels in mine.” 
“Spence, where did you read that?” She asked, stopping him.
“Y/n’s love note.” JJ looked at me with such sympathy. She figured it out. The tears streaming down my face were hot as I tried to wipe them away.
“Spencer!” I yelled. He finally stopped smiling, watching the tears stream down my face. “I know you have trouble picking up cues, I just never realized you could be such an asshole.” 
He looked at me with an emotion I couldn’t describe. I turned around, shoulder checking Derek as he tried to stop me. I could hear my name being called, but I didn’t stop. I ran down the stairs. I couldn’t wait for the elevator.
I pushed the doors open as I was gasping for a breath of fresh air. Tears clouded my eyes as I sat down on the curb. I let my head rest on my knees, replaying the scene in my head. He couldn’t hear me when I told him to stop. He wasn’t even paying attention to me. He was just smiling. I wiped my tears away, pulling out the letter, unfolding it, reading my god awful chicken scratch cursive. How Spencer was able to read it was beyond me. I watched as the paper dampened as my tears hit it. 
“God, I’m so stupid.” I sighed.
“I wouldn’t say that.” I whipped my head around looking up at Spencer’s tall stature. I folded the paper back up, tucking it back in my shirt, wiping away more tears.
“Here to mock me some more?” I looked away resting my chin on my knees. He sat down next to me and I rolled my head so I didn’t have to look at him.
“No,” He sighed. “I’m here to say I’m sorry.”
“It doesn’t matter. It’s a stupid note anyway.” I could feel his stare on me. I played with some of the loose gravel near my feet.
“If it’s stupid, then why try to hide it?” I squinted my eyes, turning my head to look at him. He had a soft smile on his face as if this was his plan all along.
“Go to hell.” I got up, brushing myself off walking away.
“Y/n, no, wait.” Spencer trailed behind me.
“No, Spencer,” I sighed, cursing myself for crying again. “It was a stupid note, for a stupid person, who will never feel the same. So it doesn’t matter.”
“I don’t know why I’m so nervous to even write my feelings.” I stopped turning around. He held the note in his hands. It had fallen out when I got up and I didn’t realize. “I know you will never see this, but writing it makes it seem real I guess. Before I could just pretend I don’t feel this way, but it’s eating at me slowly chipping away pieces of me.” He stepped closer to me, still reciting it, but he changed it. “When I first met you, I thought you were drop dead gorgeous. I liked the way you listened to me and were actually interested in what I had to say. Your limitless hunger for knowledge makes my heart warm. I noticed you were having a bad day because you pull on your hair slightly like you’re trying to pull your thoughts together and I wanted to make you feel comfortable. That was the day I realized I would do whatever you wanted.” He had taken more steps towards me. He placed his hands on my cheeks, so gently like he thought I was going to disappear. I closed my eyes, savoring the moment before reality could catch up.
“Y/n, look at me.” His voice was gentle as if he were talking to a child. I looked up at him, placing my hands over his on my face. “I love you. I love you with every fiber of my being. My heart beats for you and only you.” He wiped away a few tears from my face and I leaned in, titling my head up more. He leaned down pressing his lips against my own. My eyes fluttered closed pressing all my emotions into the kiss. He kissed me back with the same fever I did. My head was spinning. I moved my hands to his hair, gripping at the root afraid I was going to wake up. He pulled away to take a breath and he opened his eyes, smiling.
“So you love me, huh?” 
“Shut up.” I smiled, pulling him back in for another kiss.
~Fin
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prousterinhernest · 3 years
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Oh god, I need to talk about that Powerpuff Girls script
So, do I ever actually post here? No. Has a part of my childhood been re-opened, stepped on repeatedly and run over with a car? Yep. So to spare my poor mother from the many rants about this script and her repressed memories of a young me just watching the show on repeat, I’m here to talk about it from a script perspective.
I’m so glad this is the main thing I use my degree for. To spare us all, I’m shoving this in parts because I’m so glad they shoved this script into a five act structure to make this easier for me.
So let’s start this off with the ten minute teaser at the beginning. Apparently, this all starts in 2003 with a seven-year-old Blossom, Buttercup and Bubbles. They’re flying through the sky, and okay, I’ll give them some nostalgia factor for this. However, I’m saying this now - this reads like an animation script. This is live-action, and instead they’re really using the description of “cotton candy clouds”? Please, stick to whether you want it to be live-action or animation. Please.
Also, their dresses are described as impractical and it’s like... Guys. You’re already starting to describe the dresses as impractical for seven-year-olds. You know what else is impractical? Seven-year-olds destined to fight crime. 
Blossom is described as the leader, go-getter and goody-goody. Now, from what I remember - yeah that does describe Blossom. I’m really coming from a place of a person who’s memories of the show are only kinda coming back after 20 years so, if I get anything wrong then someone - please tell me.
Buttercup’s the scrappy, scowling tomboy - not even described by the narrator with that one. Instead, the narrator is just like she’s the tough one and a “hard-ass” and I wouldn’t describe a seven-year-old as a hard-ass. 
Then Bubbles. Poor, sweet innocent Bubbles, who always was my favourite as a child and what have they done to you. She was the sweet and cheerful one, most of the time - according to the narrator. And you know, I’ll accept the dialogue for the seven-year-old Bubbles saying woot. It was 2003, but you know, woot is not a word I’ve heard in ages. I know I’m fixating, but then she immediately after this mentions how the Professor mentions efficacy and you know what, I don’t think a seven-year-old would say the word efficacy and I just have a lot of issues with Bubbles dialogue in this script and this is just the start.
So they’re flying, they’re fighting a giant three-headed-pegasus monster but in my head, I’m just seeing that weird giant three-headed-dragon thing from My Little Pony and I don’t know why but we don’t see it much because you just know the writers were only thinking about how the producers will react to this, I see that “(don’t worry)” in the script and I know they’re just worrying the producers about the budget. 
Which is why we get a short-ass fight and then immediately after we get a flashback to 1996. To when they were created. Note: They weren’t born, they were created to be the age of 7 in 1996 and yet they’re still that age in 2003. Am I being pedantic? Yes. Is that bothering me a lot? Oh god yes.
Also Mojo Jojo is two people and just make him a monkey you cowards. I know you managed to get Gorilla Grodd in The Flash, so just do it. Instead, we’ve got Dr Joseph Mondel, who’s Utonium’s science partner. He’s there when they’re born and supposedly he and... Drake, are close. 
“Couldn’t have done this without you Mojo,” you are a liar Professor. You are not the man I remember you to be good sir. 
Then Professor Utonium gets his happy life, also with a hot girlfriend - why did you date Sara Bellum? I recall her being married to her work? Heaven forbid we have a single father being a good figure for his children. Right, CW? I’m so glad that we got Sara Bellum being reduced to becoming just Drake Utonium’s girlfriend (for now).
Next we’ve got them saving a bank from Fuzzy Lumpkins, and you know what? We don’t need this scene. I only hear the narrator and you should not be relying so much on the narrator because has no one told you show don’t tell? Because I’m pretty sure if I relied on a narrator for a show like this, my lecturers would have gutted me like a fish.
Mojo, who is still tragically not a monkey, is apparently sick with envy. He wanted to be like Elon Musk, and I say this again, he wanted to be like Elon Musk and how dare you insult Mojo Jojo in this way. But yeah, he was forgotten by Utonium once Utonium went famous and his son is now an obsessive Blossom fanboy. I wish I was joking. But this is no Jojo-joke. (I’ll show myself out, don’t worry).
Mojo has enough power to hold a rally, and say that Utonium stole his work and that the girls are dangerous and you know, as a concept? I’d be okay with that. I too would be worried about children with superpowers. Hell, I was a dick as a child. If I had powers? Damn son, I’d be the worst. 
But you know, he wasn’t their only enemy. They also had... puberty. God, I wish this was a joke. I really wish it was. 
Blossom, at age 17, despite how she should probably be 24 if she and her sisters were born at the age of 7 in 1996 - Yes, that’s my issue - is studying for SATs and they made it so Buttercup is cheating on her girlfriend. Thanks guys. Way to ruin Buttercup. Then we have Bubbles. Bubbles who is hungover, and forced flamingos in the zoo to drink Hypnotiq. 
I stand by my previous statement: Bubbles what have they done to you?
Also, despite Blossom being the leader and the apparent moral high-ground for the kids she doesn’t seem to be as goody-goody as she was described earlier on. I’d have thought she’d be against her siblings who are both forcing flamingos to drink and cheating on girlfriends - but no, she’s super chill with them. 
Added bonus: Buttercup doesn’t want to wear a dress because it’s compulsive heterosexuality. So, bad news everyone - dresses are completely heterosexual now. 
They go to fight Swampy, and Bubbles is literally treating everything like a TV-show and Drake has clearly been a horrible influence and Sara Bellum calls him out for it. She’s then classed as not being a member of the family, and dick move Drake. You had a good stepmother figure character but of course, she breaks up with him. (After nine years and being exclusive for seven. I... I can’t with Drake).
Next up giant squid robot appears while they fight Swampy. You know, despite there being lots of protestors, surely someone would have noticed by now that there’s only Mojo piloting that giant squid that will reek more damage than these teenagers? Right...? 
Nope, not so. Instead, there’s Blossom picking a fight with Anti-Powerpuff Protestors and Bubbles fighting Swampy, while Blossom is dealing with the giant squid robot being controlled by Mojo. Jojo’s co-piloting it and all I can think is, this guy literally has a Blossom action figure in his hand. This isn’t a crush, he’s literally obsessed. Giant squid robot destroys a building, Blossom tries to save people, ends up accidentally killing Mojo in front of his son.
On the plus side, Mojo had a monkey lab-rat partner but having a talking monkey was too real? God, I hate this.
But yeah, the Powerpuff Girls are now controversial despite the fact they didn’t kill Mojo. I mean, Blossom did accidentally, but she then got PTSD and ran away. Bubbles and Buttercup call out the protestors and the press outside their house and I just want to end this with: Just let Buttercup say Fuck.
...
That’s just the teaser. I’m really sorry everyone that is just the teaser and for the sake of it I’m only focusing on the script. I don’t wanna focus on the casting yet because you know? Imagining Turk as Professor Utonium is just pain.
I’m just gonna leave this one here and I’ll talk about the trainwreck that is Act I in a little while because really. Really. 
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Chapter 3 is finally done! Sorry it took longer - finals week happened and it was a harder chapter to write for some reason. I'm excited to finish this story though - we're half-way through :)
Chapter 3: Lighting the flame
Christopher met his friends outside, where they piled into a carriage and set off for the Devil Tavern. The atmosphere between them was still tense; James and Matthew, sitting across from him, were quiet. Christopher wished, as he so often did, that he understood people better. He hated it when they all fought, and now it was partly his fault and he didn’t know how to fix it. Thankfully, James took the initiative.
“Kit,” he began, “we’re sorry for being so confrontational. It’s only you have to understand how it looks from our perspective. Grace’s actions, even if she regrets them, caused a great deal of pain.” James looked troubled.
“Thomas shared some of what you all learned yesterday talking to Jesse,” Matthew said softly. “About how bad things were for her with Tatiana. And it…well I still don’t trust her but it sounds like she’s trying to be – to be better. And I out of everyone should be sympathetic to that.” His hand moved unconsciously to his jacket. He had stopped carrying a flask everywhere but after so many years of drinking, it was still a reflex to reach for the alcohol.
James seemed to notice this motion, and clasped his parabatai’s shoulder briefly in support, then returned his attention to Christopher. “I suppose what I’ll say is that I cannot soon forget what Grace has done, and I prefer to avoid her,” James said carefully, “but I – none of us – should be trying to control who you spend time with Kit. I am sorry. If you trust her, then we shall trust you.”
“Oh, jolly good,” Christopher said, immensely relieved. He hated conflict, especially with his friends. “I am sorry that I didn’t think to mention her helping. She’s the first friend I’ve ever made.”
His friends all looked suddenly gut-punched for some reason. “Kit, do you not think we’re friends?” Matthew asked, appearing quite distressed.
“Of course we are! Aren’t we?” Christopher was, for a second time that evening, horribly confused.
“But you just said –” James began, looking stricken.
“Do you mean she’s the first friend that you personally have made, on your own, Kit?” Thomas asked, understanding Christopher best as usual.
“Precisely!” Christopher said, then realized, “Ah, I understand now how that sounded. I meant that – well, I’m related to two of you and we all just sort of fell in together didn’t we? I have never made a friend on my own.” The rest of the Merry Thieves relaxed visibly.
“Fair enough,” Matthew said, looking relieved. “Honestly Kit, Grace Bla – sorry , Cartwright – out of everyone you could choose for a friend.” He shook his head but there was a teasing glint in his eye.
“She’s really a wonderful lab partner!” Christopher assured them cheerfully. “She’s been organizing everything and making an inventory. And she had a wonderful insight the other day about this reaction with sulfuric acid.”
Thomas shifted on the seat next to Christopher as he said “I never would have expected scientific curiosity from Grace of all people, but she was right at home in that laboratory today.”
“Honestly, it took me a second to recognize her – wearing a dark dress, and those ridiculous goggles that you also wear in the lab,” Matthew said, gesturing at Christopher.
“They may not be fashionable, but they are very important as protective gear,” Christopher told him.
Matthew shuddered slightly but smiled good-naturedly as he said, “And that is why I will never pursue science. Terrible field for the fashion-minded.” This started him on a wild story about finding a new waistcoat earlier that week. Christopher was quite satisfied that peace had been restored, and thoroughly enjoyed the rest of the night with his friends.
_________________________________________________________
The following Wednesday, Christopher was even more eager than usual to get to Grosvenor Square – Henry was due to arrive back in London that morning. He was keen to get Henry’s thoughts on several projects, especially the runed guns and the fire messages.
Christopher started the morning by testing another rune combination on a message. This attempt ended, as many did, in a small explosion. He was still putting out a fire on the lab table when Grace arrived for the day. She greeted him briefly before starting to set up a reaction flask. During her organization of the lab she had come across a vial with some mysterious white powder. Christopher had no idea what it was, so they decided it would be an intriguing exercise for her to determine the contents.
Soon after Grace’s arrival, a humming noise sounded, then a whistling, signaling that the elevator down to the lab was in use. Christopher hurried over as the doors opened. “Welcome back, Henry!” he said, grinning.
Henry looked just the same as always, with perhaps a bit more gray in his hair after the stress of the past few months. “Kit, my boy!” he greeted as he maneuvered his Bath chair out of the elevator and towards the lab table. “How are things going? Any progress on those guns with the pithos? And you must help me examine this sample of water I brought back from Alicante, I wonder if we could try using it in another version of demon repelling ointment. Being around so many wards, it may be imbued with some demon-repelling properties.” He reached the work table and paused as he finally noticed Grace standing there. Henry looked bewildered and Christopher struggled to remember whether he had mentioned Grace in his letter to Henry. He was fairlysure that he had.
“Hello!” Henry said to her pleasantly, “You’re the one with the demon powers that was briefly engaged to my son. Gladys, yes?” Well, letter or otherwise, at least Henry remembered her.
“Grace, actually,” she replied, looking tense, her posture stiff. “I do want to apologize again for…everything.”
Henry waved off her concern and said, “It all ended alright didn’t it? Charles Buford will find someone else. And Kit mentioned you’ve been a great help in the lab recently!”
Good, Christopher thought, I did remember to include that in the letter.
“I would actually be quite interested to hear about your power and how it worked. Especially through a bracelet, fascinating!” Henry continued as he maneuvered towards the rack of chemicals.
Grace appeared exceedingly uncomfortable, but quickly warmed up to Henry throughout the day as he described various project ideas to her and took a look at her reactions. By that evening, when all three were involved in a lengthy discussion about runes and the application of runes to invention, it was as if Grace had always been part of the team. Christopher was delighted anew that Grace understood both he and Henry in a way that very few others did.
They finally finished for the night after Charlotte had called down the stairs three times with increasing insistence about coming up for dinner. Grace left to catch a carriage home with a smile on her face. Christopher wished briefly that she could stay longer, but he was comforted by the fact that she would return in the morning.
_________________________________________________________
“Hullo Grace!” Christopher said happily as she entered the lab early the next day. He then bent back down to examine a glass slide under the microscope. Henry was occupied entertaining some visitors with Charlotte, but Christopher was already hard at work. “You must come take a look at this sample of water from Lake Lyn that Henry brought,” he told her. It was fascinating watching the microorganisms move about in the droplet under the lens. When Grace did not immediately respond, he looked up and actually got a good look at her face. “I say, is something wrong, Grace? You’re a bit –” He was about to say ‘splotchy’, for her normally pale face was quite red in parts. He caught himself at the last second however, remembering his mother saying that a gentleman should never remark on a lady’s less-than-favorable appearance. “You look upset,” he said instead. She was not her normal cool and collected self.
He thought that Grace would brush off his concern, and she indeed stiffened and started to turn away. Then she met his gaze and her shoulder slumped in resignation. “I encountered Charles on my way in,” she explained.
“Ah. I forgot that he would be returning with Henry,” Christopher said, wincing. “Things are still awkward after ending the engagement then?”
“More than awkward,” she answered, expression still pinched. “He is still extremely upset that I manipulated his mind. Said I’d made a fool of him and he doesn’t want me in his house.” She set her coat and hat down on the stool with more force than strictly necessary.
Christopher frowned and said, “Technically it’s Henry and Charlotte’s house.”
A faint smile rose on Grace’s lips. “That’s precisely what I told him, and I mentioned that I worked with Henry just yesterday. He then called you both ‘trusting fools’ and made some…unflattering statements about my personage.”
“Well perhaps if we give him some more time, he’ll come round!” Christopher said optimistically. “I suppose it’s easier for me to say since you only used your power on me once or twice compared to the many more times you used it on him.”
Grace looked at him, pale brows drawn together in puzzlement. “I never used my power on you, Christopher,” she said slowly.
Christopher was wholly astonished by her statement. “You – never? Really?” he asked, mentally reeling. “What ho! But the night you came to the laboratory and helped me figure out the pithos I – are you sure?”
Grace shook her head. “Never. I’m completely sure,” she said firmly. “I would have apologized if I had, I –” she stared at him, looking almost indignant. “You really invited me here, have been working with me, and all this time you though I had manipulated you that night? And never gave you a formal apology?” she asked incredulously.
“When you asked about joining me in the lab that first day, you apologized for everything again. I assumed that included any time you used your power on me!” Christopher said, thoughts racing. He had been so eager to help her that night. Although now that he thought about it, they had discussed a lot of science, which he now knew Grace was genuinely interested in. “Why didn’t you?” he asked her, very curious.
Grace hesitated before saying, “I didn’t need to. You weren’t bothered by my being there and you were happy to show me around.” Something flickered in her pale eyes. “I never liked using my power when I could avoid it. I suppose because I knew that it was wrong,” she added. She looked as if she might say something else, but at that moment a whistling noise from the elevator indicated that Henry was on his way down to the lab.
They were soon absorbed in experimenting and discussing theories but at points Christopher found his focus drifting back to their conversation, and even farther back to that first night in the lab. It seemed like Grace had used her power on nearly everyone at some point, yet incredibly, she had never used it on him despite numerous opportunities. Christopher didn’t know what to make of that.
_________________________________________________________
It was just Christopher and Henry in the lab the following day. Grace was training with Jesse, and then planned to take a tour around the city with her brother, Lucie, and Ariadne (who was apparently going by Kamala these days). Christopher could never be bored working with Henry but after having Grace’s constant companionship for nearly a month it was…strange, to be working with only Henry and not her.
The day’s work proved incredibly successful, however. Upon Henry’s suggestion, Christopher added a bridge rune to the fire communication rune he had been tinkering with for months. He was thrilled to observe the message burn up and reform a few feet away. Henry, delighted, helped him replicate the results numerous times to prove that it was a repeatable phenomenon. Henry demonstrated it for a startled Charlotte (she had been interrupted in the middle of writing a letter in her office). She beamed, proud of them both, giving Henry a congratulatory kiss.
Christopher could not wait to share the good news with Grace. He wished she had been there to see it the first time, but no matter – there would be plenty of time to demonstrate it tomorrow.
He and Henry spent the rest of the afternoon trying to get the messages to travel farther than a few feet. Although foiled in these attempts, the breakthrough left them both very pleased as they finished for the day.
_________________________________________________________
Christopher was waiting at the entrance for Grace the next morning, eager to share the news. She looked startled to find him right behind the door as it opened, which he supposed was unusual given that they always met down in the lab. She had barely finished saying good morning before he could not contain his excitement and exclaimed, “You must come see the breakthrough Henry and I made yesterday, Grace! We’re so close to having a working fire-message!” He caught her arm and hurried her to the stairs down to the lab. She seemed a bit disoriented by his sudden enthusiasm but listened intently with a bemused smile as he explained the thought process behind the rune combination they had tried.
They reached the work table and Christopher quickly traced out the new rune. The paper burned up and reformed a few feet in front of them. When it reappeared, Grace grinned widely. “Incredible!” she declared, and she snatched the paper to study the rune. It occurred to Christopher that Grace had a very nice smile. She normally had a serious face, but smiles had become more frequent as the weeks had passed.
“What have you tried adding to this so far?” she asked. Christopher grabbed his notebook and they reviewed what he had recorded the previous day.
“Do you mind if I try some things?” Grace asked. “I’ve been studying that book on runes that Henry gave me – I think I may have a few ideas.”
“By all means!” Christopher told her, delighted. “I could use a break from runes after all the work yesterday. I think I’ll experiment with the Lake Lyn water today and try a demon-repelling ointment again.”
“All right, then,” she said, and set to work with a determined expression.
Later that afternoon, Henry already finished for the day and off to some important dinner, Christopher was checking the now-complete inventory list. “Blast!” he said softly, then called over to Grace, “Do you remember seeing nightshade anywhere when you were organizing?”
She pursed her lips in thought, then shook her head. “No, none,” she answered.
“I suppose I’ll be taking a trip to the Shadow Market tonight then,” Christopher said. He was determined to try combining some nightshade extract with the new demon-repelling ointment he was developing.
“The Shadow Market?” Grace queried, eyebrows raised in interest. “Do you go there often? I wanted to go before when I was looking for something to help Jesse, but I was never confident that I could find my way around.”
“It’s a wonderful place! I have to go fairly often for ingredients that are, er, not strictly approved by the Clave,” he explained. “Oh!” he said, struck by an obvious thought, “would you like to accompany me tonight?”
“I would love to,” Grace said, looking excited. She sent a letter to Jesse to inform him of the change in plans, and eagerly questioned Christopher about various aspects of the Market.
They each wrapped up their work as the sun began to set, the changing sky visible from a high window in the basement. Christopher was locating his coat and hat when he realized he should ask Grace about weapons. It was unlikely they’d face any demons in the carriage or Shadow Market, but it was good to be prepared. She had daggers on her already, but he offered her a seraph blade in addition. Ready, with ingredient list in hand, the set out to the carriage.
Christopher offered Grace an arm up, then followed her in. Their knees brushed together as he settled on the seat opposite Grace and the carriage began moving. Christopher noticed that she looked somewhat flushed. “Would you like the window open?” he asked. “You look a bit warm.”
“No, I’m perfectly comfortable, thank you,” she said, appearing discomposed. “What are you hoping to accomplish with the nightshade that you’ll be getting?” she asked.
Christopher happily launched into a lengthy explanation of his thought process and the previous attempts at demon-repelling ointment, and the discussion lasted them all the way to the Shadow Market.
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mysingularitybts · 4 years
Text
Call Center a Park Jimin Oneshot
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Call Center
Pairing: Park Jimin x reader 
Genre: romance, AU, fluff, bit of angst 
Disclaimer: none 
As you walked down the hallway you were excitedly chatting with your closest friend, Hana. You were talking about a new TV show that came out the night before.
"What about when he kissed her?" Hana squealed loudly "I was so shocked I hadn't expected it to happen so soon."
"Yeah, but I think something bad is going to happen and it's going to put a stop to their relationship. I mean did you see how Maria reacted to the kiss?" I said to Hana.
"Oh, you are probably right y/n, I just hope it's not too soon," she pouted.
As you kept talking a body crashed into your shoulder very roughly.
"Ow," you winced as you rubbed your shoulder.
"Watch where you're going!" A voice exclaimed in irritation.
Looking up you saw Park Jimin. He was a classmate who hated you for no apparent reason.
"I was literally standing here, you bumped into me," you cried out exasperated.
"Whatever let's go guys," Jimin told his friends and just like that he left.
It was nothing new. It was a common occurrence for him to bother you in some way. Sometimes it's the mean comments and other times it's the pranks.
"Why does he hate you so much?" Hana asked from her place beside you.
"I have no idea. At the beginning of college we were friends, but then he started hating me out of nowhere," you explained thinking back to when college started, "oh well" you shrugged.
"Doesn't it bother you?" She asked once again.
"It used to, yet every time I tried talking to him, he would just ignore me, so I gave up," you told her.
"That's rude," Hana muttered a frown forming on her face.
"Yeah, well, I have to go to work. See you tomorrow?" you asked as you got closer to the exit.
"Yeah bye," Hana waved as you went your separate ways.
As you left the building you saw Jimin again. You couldn't deny he was very handsome especially when you saw him laughing along with his friends just like he is now. It made you remember how back when you were friends you started to develop a crush on him, and it was all because of that smile and laugh. You never made a move seeing as he never gave you a sign that he liked you, so you moved on. Eventually, you started dating your first boyfriend. It was a good relationship and it lasted around a year. You broke up since you both realized you didn't have a deep feeling for each other. So, it ended amicably, but by then Jimin was not your friend anymore.
Being so deep in your thoughts you hadn't realized you were almost at your job. Going into the office you sat on your cubicle and put on your headset ready to start receiving calls.
"Hello, this is Seoul's call center. How may I help you?" you asked in a polite tone. At this point, what you said and how you said it was automatic.
You stayed there for many hours on end receiving calls left and right trying to help as many people as possible. Towards the end of your shift, you received an interesting call.
"Hello, this is y/n from Seoul's call center, how may I help you today?"
"Hi, I'm looking for some plumbing service," the voice asked shyly.
It was a very sweet voice that seemed familiar, yet you couldn't quite place from where.
"Of course, is it for anything in specific?" you asked once again trying to find the best person for the job.
"It's my sink. No matter what I do it keeps leaking," he explained with frustration in his voice.
"Oh, that must be horrible!" you exclaimed, "I think I know who might help you."
"Great, I'm tired of having to replace buckets during the night," he chuckled into the phone.
"Would you like to call the contact yourself to arrange the meeting or do you want us to set it up?" you questioned with a smile. His voice was so nice.
"oh-uh- I'll set it myself thank you," he said nervously for some reason.
"It's no problem I'm just doing my job," you told him kindly.
After giving him the contact, you bid your farewells and hung up. There were always some voices that stuck with you and he was one of them. It sounded so nice and melodic.
The next day you went into work again and started receiving calls. During the middle of the shift, you received a call from the same guy as yesterday.
"Hi, I called yesterday with the sink problem?" he told me uneasily.
"Hello, yes, I remember. Was everything alright?" you asked worriedly hoping he didn't give back any negative feedback since it could give you problems with your manager.
"Yes, it was perfect. I just wanted to thank you and all that." He responded abashedly.
Letting out a relieved sigh you said, "It was no problem I was just doing my job."
"So-um- yeah..." he trailed off not knowing what to say next.
"Well if that is all- "you started saying although you got cut off.
"No, wait, I did want to thank you, but I also wanted to um talk to you?" he said unsure.
"Talk to me? About what?" you were curious about what he wanted to talk about because what else was there to it?
"I know you from college, but I've never had the guts to talk to you in person," he explained quietly.
"Oh, you had me worried there for a second," you giggled.
Nothing like this had ever happened to you before and it was interesting if you're being honest. This situation could explain why the voice is so familiar. Maybe you've heard him speak during a presentation.
"I'm just very shy and you're almost always with your friends," he started saying, "not that it's a problem," he then stuttered.
"How about this? What if I give you my number and you can call me, and we can talk at least till you're more comfortable to meet me?" you proposed a smile forming on your lips. Were you being stupid? Maybe, for all, you know this person was a stalker or a catfish, yet the voice kept drawing you in.
"Really? Wow that would be amazing," he said happily.
"Great my number is xxx-xxx-xxxx,"
"Thanks again and I hope it didn't come off as creepy," he said.
"Well only a little bit, but that's okay it's cute," you teased him a bit.
"Talk to you later?" he asked.
"Sure, just call me"
It was exciting, it was almost as if having a secret admirer. It's been a while since you've talked to a guy or went on a date. You're excited to get back in the game who knows if a boyfriend or future husband comes out of it. Giggling to yourself you kept working with more energy as you excitedly waited for the call.
Once you were home you took a shower and got ready for bed. Afterward, you sat on your bed watching some random show, yet your eyes couldn't stay on the screen. Every so often they would wander to your phone waiting for the anticipated call. Each time it lit up you scrambled to pick it up, but each time you ended up disappointed seeing it was either an app notification or a message from your other friends. It wasn't until you were almost asleep that the phone rang.
As soon as it started ringing you felt wide awake again and went to grab the phone. Seeing it was an unknown number you waited a few more seconds till you picked up.
"Hello?" you said as you answered the phone.
"Hi y/n," the voice greeted.
"Hi! How was your day?" you asked, trying to start a conversation.
From then on you spoke on the phone every day with him. It became a routine and it gave you something to look forward to. You got to know the mystery guy very well. He was a dance major and was from Busan. It reminded you about your past friend, but you didn't pay it no mind. You could spend hours talking to him, it was that easy. He made you smile, laugh, and blush. He made your days ten times better just by listening to him talk.
A month had passed, and it might sound unbelievable, but you felt as if you'd fallen in love with mystery guy. From the things you talked about he seemed like the perfect guy for you. The thing is you still didn't know what his name was or how he looked like. At college, you always tried to keep a lookout, yet there was no way of knowing. If only you knew someone from the dance major that could help you, but the only person you knew was Jimin and we all know how this story goes. Talking about Jimin you've noticed he hasn't bothered you much these past couple of weeks. If anything he'd send you a glare but nothing else. It was weird you were so used to his teasing that you kind of missed it.
Shaking those thoughts away you set a mission for yourself. Today once mystery guy called you, you were going to ask him to finally meet you. He couldn't be so shy as to say no. You've practically made it obvious you liked him.
A few hours later you finally received the call and with no hesitation, you answered immediately.
"Hiii," you said, smiling to yourself.
"Heeey y/n," he said giggling.
"So, I was wondering..." you started saying.
"Hm?" he hummed as he waited for your question.
"What if we meet up this week?" you blurted out quickly. Through the speaker, you could hear as he took an intake of breath.
"M-m-eet up?" he stuttered.
"Yeah, I mean we've been talking for a month now and you saw how nice I am," you explained trying to convince him.
"Well, okay, sure," he said in a low tone dubiously.
"What about tomorrow at the school's fountain at 5?" you proposed excitedly not noticing his doubtfulness.
"Yeah, alright I can do that," he agreed.
"Great see you tomorrow," you declared hanging up the phone.
Meanwhile in his apartment, mystery guy lowered the phone from his ear slowly. He let out a shuddered breath hoping that tomorrow would go well. He hoped you would accept him and would forget about the things he's done that he is not proud of. He couldn't run anymore. It was time he faced the feelings he had.
You couldn't believe you were finally going to meet him. Once the call ended you started jumping on the bed. Realizing you had little time you quickly started putting an outfit together for tomorrow. In reality, you didn't know what to expect for tomorrow, but wanted to look good for it. You could end up with a date, a boyfriend, or who knows maybe just a friend. Hopefully, it would be one of the first two.
You couldn't explain it because you haven't met him, yet thinking about him made you blush. For being a shy guy, he was a pretty flirty guy always surprising you in the most unexpected times. He listened to you, gave you advice, comforted you on the hard days. Mystery boy made your heart race just by thinking about him. You couldn't see a reason as to why you would reject him.
The next day you woke up with a smile on your face. You took your time getting ready seeing as your first class was at noon and after classes, you wouldn't have time to go to your apartment change and come back to the fountain. With one last look at the mirror making sure you looked good you walked out of your apartment ready for the day to come.
Throughout your classes, you couldn't sit still and your knee kept bouncing. Hana gave you a weird look and it wasn't long until she asked about your strange behavior.
"What's got you so fidgety?" Hana asked curiously as she gave you a side glance.
"I'm finally going to meet mystery guy?!" You whisper, shouted.
"Really?!" she whispered back giving you a shocked look.
"Yeah, today by the fountain,"
"Good luck I hope he's as amazing as he is on the phone," she finally said, her attention going back to the lecture.
Little did you know that a row behind you sat mystery guy and he had listened to your not so silent conversation. He was happy to know you were excited to meet him, but then negative thoughts started to plague his mind. 'What if you are not what she expects?' 'How will she take it when she realizes it was you all this time?' Shaking his head, he focused on the class trying to avoid those thoughts. It was the time you finally knew the truth.
At five on the dot, you sat on a bench around the fountain. You observed how the lights changed color making it look even more beautiful. You could sit there hours on end stuck in your head, yet at the moment you were too aware of your surroundings. Your eyes roamed the area around you waiting for that person to approach you. Many times, you were deceived as a man walked closer, but each time they were greeted by friends or lovers that were not you. Around twenty minutes after five you closed your eyes and let out a sigh. Maybe he wasn't ready to meet you. You didn't understand how a person could be so shy that even after a month of talking they are not ready to see you. Perhaps he didn't like you as much as you thought and all that flirting was for fun.
Still, you decided to wait a few more minutes if by 5:30 he was not here you would leave. Looking around you saw a man approaching you since it was getting dark you couldn't tell who it was. As he got closer your eyebrows furrowed at the person that approached you.
"Hey," he said as he smiled at you.
"What do you want Jimin?" you asked him, your eyes still roaming the area.
"I was supposed to meet someone here,"
"Welcome to the club," you spoke bitterly as you looked at the time with a sigh you stood up.
"Wait, where are you going?" he said alarmed.
"I'm leaving," you exclaimed, "I got stood up," you whispered that last part.
"How are you so sure?" he asked quietly.
"Well, he is not here is he?" you stated loudly.
"I would say he is," he told you decidedly.
"What? Where?" you asked confused seeing nobody else around you two.
"He is standing right in front of you," he revealed as he looked to the ground.
"Are you saying that you're the guy I've been talking to?" you questioned in disbelief.
"Yes," he answers timidly.
"I don't understand you've been bullying me for the past two years and now you tell me that you like me, why?" you yell overwhelmed by the information being revealed.
"I was an idiot," he began saying, "When you started dating Younjin I was jealous. I liked you so much I couldn't handle it so I distanced myself, but you always reached out," as he kept talking his tone became louder until he was practically shouting.
"I was an idiot that didn't know how to handle my feelings, so I pushed you out, and to keep you out the only way I thought to do it was by messing with you and it worked," he admitted his eyes never leaving yours. You stood there surprised letting him explain himself.
"Sadly, those feelings never went away and even if I tried to fool myself I always knew deep down what I felt for you," he finished. While he talked his tone went down to the point where you had to strain your hearing to understand what he said.
"And what's that?" you asked awaiting his answer. Your heart was beating a hundred miles per hour, but so was Jimin's. He had been waiting for this moment for a long time and now that it was finally here, he wanted to let it out.
"That I love you y/n...and I was the fool who pushed you away and then didn't know how to get you back. If I could go back in time and punch myself in the face to stop me from being so stupid and cowardly I would, but I can't," he mentioned with a small chuckle, yet it quickly went away as he said these last words.
"I just hope you can forgive me and my idiocy and give me a chance? If you don't want to that is fine, and I'll understand. I just had to give it a shot."
He looked at you with sad eyes waiting for your response. You stood staring at him for a good minute processing his words. You couldn't believe that the person who you had fallen for was also the person who had tormented you for the past two years. Then again, he was a good friend before it all and you had a crush on him long ago. Were you willing to give him a chance after all he did?
"I agree with you, you are an idiot," you spoke in a serious tone, "but I forgive you."
Jimin gave you a hopeful smile thinking you were giving him a chance, but first you had to make something clear.
"I am willing to give you a chance on one condition," you mysteriously said.
"Anything," he answered quickly, hope never leaving his eyes.
"We are going to take this slowly since I can't simply forget all that you did," you explained having made a decision.
"I understand," he agreed sadly but the spark in his eyes never left nor did the slight curves on his lips.
"So, how about you take me on a date?" you asked with a smile.
"Definitely, where to?" He questioned offering his arm to you as you both walked away from the fountain.
"Surprise me, mystery guy," you replied taking hold of his arm.
"You should have confessed back then," you then spoke.
"Why?" he simply asked.
"Because I had feelings for you too."
He turned to look at you in shock, but then he let out a chuckle as he shook his head.
That was the beginning of your relationship with Jimin or mystery guy. Maybe if either of you had the guts to say it sooner you would have been dating for years now, yet neither did. Perhaps it wasn't the right time, who knows? What you did know was that from that moment on Jimin became his best self, after all, he had the best girl with him. While you worked on the call center, you'd received many calls, but your favorites had to be your mystery guys. When he'd call it was to say one simple thing... "I love you".
A/N: If you guys enjoyed it please let me know and make sure to like and reblog to show your support.
Would you have given Jimin a chance?
-I don't know if I would have. I would have been paranoid that it was a trick or something.
See you guys later ;) 💜 x
-Nikki Marie
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