#how are people ignoring the OBVIOUS

[vivika-ka]

Antis that insist Karen making a move on Billy is okay because he flirted with her it’s concerning for a number of reasons, but what never fails to absolutely disgust me is their thought process.

Are we to assume that every person between the ages of, let’s say, 16-18 that are sexualizing themselves are essentially inviting 38-40 year old adults to have sex with them?

I don’t remember where I saw it but someone once mentioned, “Sexualizing children and teenagers is bad, including when they sexualize themselves.”

It’s not an invitation, for fuck’s sake. It’s not a girlboss moment for a 38-40 year old to want to have sex with a 17-18 year old. She knew Billy was Nancy’s age, we have it right there on season 2. And antis are ok with ignoring that because *checks paper* right, Ted Wheeler is a lackluster and uncaring husband. Maybe get a divorce? (and don’t give me, “it was the 80s excuse,” the 80s had record shattering divorce rates). Maybe sit down with your husband and have a conversation? Maybe look for someone your own god damn age?

As an adult, and yes, as a mother (I’m pulling this card, idc) Karen should’ve turned him down the moment he made an advance on season 2. Maybe sit him down and explain that people her age shouldn’t be accepting sex from a teenager. Perhaps for once act like the mother of a “nuclear family” she pretends to be.

[Also, fuck the Duffers for portraying that as hot]

And the fact that we have to clarify why Karen Wheeler accepting Billy’s advances in plain 2022, with all the bullshit purity culture happening, is beyond me.

[knightingale]

The "Sansa reminds Sandor of his sister" motive that some people try to hitch to his character really just flies in the face of his actual attachments to her, doesn't it? Sansa reminds Sandor of himself. He sees the little boy who used to love knights in this girl who's been swept up by the same romanticism. He sees his abuser in her abusers, the much larger knight(s) beating on the helpless child. He sees how she is betrayed by every level of authority that should have saved her and remembers his father's neglect and Tywin and Robert's apathy for Gregor's crimes. He's protective of Sansa because he was Sansa.

And GRRM's design, that one of the strongest warriors in the series, a fearsome and cynical 6'8" guy who's "muscled like a bull" and has the face of death itself, sees himself in this soft and effeminate teen girl, and empathizes with her because he was an abuse victim too, is INFINITELY more compelling than "Oh yeah I bet she just reminds him of his sister," who he's never mentioned and who we know literally nothing about. Way to unnecessarily water down a character, you couldn't have ignored the black and white text more efficiently if you tried.

[annabelle--cane]

I don't think any discourse has so truly vexed me as Georgie Discourse. I feel my soul chipping away slowly watching a dozen people who clearly just hate women hash it out for thousands of words and then I say "hey I think you're wrong," only for someone to gently put their hand on my shoulder and say "you're so right! do you want to talk about how much addicts inherently suck?" and then I burst. into flames. and blood. and guts.

[fromtheseventhhell]

I have a question for people who fervently argue that Arya has no potential for politics but think that Sansa will be one of the main political characters, and I'm asking this seriously.

If Arya learning multiple languages, how to tell + detect lies, how to rule her face so she doesn't reveal her emotions, being able to blend into different situations, thinking quick on her feet, knowing the importance of gathering information, being someone who makes friends wherever she goes, convincing a FM to help free Northern prisoners and participating in a coup, etc. don't make Arya capable of participating in politics...what exactly is it that you think Sansa will be doing as a political figure?

[happyandticklish]

Yes, a lee not being as ticklish and having the ler assure them that they're just as valid and working with them to find spots and techniques that work is great and all

But consider

Vice versa

A ler who is self-conscious about tickling and doesn't really know the right techniques or ways to go about it, and a lee who patiently walks them through it and works with them to find what tickles most

[freshwater--mermaid]

literally every single trait I've seen people call Wyll "boring" for having, are things that others companions have. Like, the favoritism is so transparent it's both pathetic and hilarious

[sunny12th]

I see where the 'dragons are nukes' people are coming from in terms of the total devastation dragons are capable of in battle and in the hands of those that want to use them in such a way.

However, dragons are clearly meant to symbolize more than just their raw power in wartime. dragons are fire made flesh, dragons are Summer, dragons are flight and freedom, dragons are playful and warm, dragons are life in defiance of winter. dragons are the strength needed to break chains, topple corruption, and burn evil itself. dragons are flaming swords and lightbringers. dragons are loyalty and protectiveness. dragons are passion and mystery and magic.

dragons are the opposite end of the magical spectrum to the others.

and dragons are, above all else, lizard cats that like to bask in the sun and get scratches on the underside of their chins.

[mikesbasementbeets]

"if they don’t tell me explicitly that mike was never attracted to el then that means he was"

[removes hands while kissing]

[unresponsive to kiss & "i love you," eyes wide open]

[the sunglasses stay on during kiss, also get off me you're crushing the flowers i carefully placed right in between us]

[no fear]

[one fear]

"idk if they don’t make it clear to me that he doesn’t love el romantically then that means he does"

"they haven't given any indication yet that he doesn't like girls..."

"yeah, mike has definitely shown attraction to girls"

[image not found]

...

[steakout-05]

i might get some hate for this depending on where this post goes but i think lesboys are so valid and the discourse about them is so ridiculous. like you guys shouldn't have to deal with all that and it frustrates me that people throw hissy fits over an identity that literally does not affect them at all.

"but men cant be lesbians-" wrong. butch lesbians and trans men have a really closely connected history with each other that practically intersects and you should really do some research on that before you make blanket statements, not to mention that gender and sexuality is weird and wobbly and fluid and a very personal experience. it means a different thing to each person. being a man can be something completely different and saying stuff like this ignores people like demiboys, demigirls, genderfluid and genderflux people etc. these people will really preach "demolish the gender binary!! love is love!!" until someone's relationship with gender and sexuality is a little too freaky for them to handle and be challenged by lmaoo

"ohhh but what about the cishet men who say they're lesbians to prey on women-" YEAH WHAT ABOUT THEM????? THIS AIN'T ABOUT THEM BRO!!!!! this argument also REEKS of terfy "trans women are just predatory men!!!111!!1" rhetoric and it grosses me out. yeah some men are gross and do try to pull this but that does not negate someone's entire identity completely just because of a few bad actors, you know that right? actual black and white behaviour.

queer discourse is silly and i don't know why it's a thing. just let people exist. it isn't that hard. we have worse things to worry about than whether someone calls themselves a lesboy or not. i think we need to unplug our ears and yank our heads out of the sand and remember that the queer community is what it is because of our unique and amazing diversity. arguing over labels like school children isn't gonna help that. damn.

[beanghostprincess]

I can't believe I just had to explain my last Zolusan (more Lusan/Sanlu than anything but yeah) fic to somebody because they said it was normalizing unhealthy behavior when it comes to starting poly relationships. As if the monster trio would talk things out like normal people. Seriously.

Please NEVER leave a comment like this on a fanfic. If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it. I am not here to educate people!! I am not your parents!! This is a fanfic site!! Don't expect me to write a manual on how to have a poly relationship, especially when it would be out of character for the main couple.

I'm gonna leave the link to the fic here and what I told them about it because now I am extremely anxious other people won't get what I want to express with this fic and I feel the need to share my thoughts:

[pikbro]

this selfship stuff got way too real so fast

anyways this is velvet

[eroticcannibal]

Regarding that whole terf being like "I can totes tell which is a real vulva just by looking at it" thing, people are covering the transmisoginy but I've noticed no one is talking about how anti-porn views are playing into how this terf views bodies

Like, their is clearly a reactionary "only bigger inner labia are real, everything is surgical" thing going on here which obviously stems from the (legitimate!) Complaints about lack of genital diversity in porn (and inner labia size was a huge point of discussion a few years back). And like, radfems being radfems, decided at the time that the appropriate response was to decide anyone with this more favoured-by-mainstream-porn kind of vulva are evil and should be mocked and probably got surgery (even if they didnt) which makes them a traitor to women etc etc

And this is not to say that this specific instance is actually an attack on anyone but trans women (though the "real vs fake women" narrative *is* something also applied to sex workers of any gender, including cis women, by radfems) but rather I feel it is something to be aware of especially considering how anti-sex work sentiment affects overly sexualised groups (trans women) and groups who engage in sex work more frequently (also trans women)

[uncanny-tranny]

just seen a post by a pre-op pre-hormones pre-everything trans woman complaining about ~evil cis bitches~ crossing the road at night when they see her and i was so so so certain it was a troll/fakepost/terf shitposting/etc but it was legit and all her friends were agreeing with her, and i'm like??? this is why cis women hate us lmao, you can't get mad if you're pre-everything and it's night time and a woman assumes you're a creep in the dark. why are the worst voices always the loudest

Why did you think this was appropriate to have sent to me instead of just... blocking her and moving on? Out of all the reasons I can think of for people to be transphobic, the thought of a trans woman being upset about feeling like she's treated like a perpetrator of a crime she isn't committing or thinking about committing doesn't cross my mind. Maybe she didn't express that frustration in a way you approve of (probably because you weren't what she was thinking about, she was probably thinking about how she was feeling), but that's where blocking her comes into play. You aren't required to view that person's post or entertain their friends, nor are you required to come into a stranger's inbox to vent about it. You don't have to dedicate time to that.

Oddly enough, I don't trust that you aren't a troll trying to stoke fires, especially through anon.

[questioning-pisces]

nobody understands aroace katniss everdeen HC like i do

[redysetdare]

I always find it interesting that homosexual coded main characters don't really get shipped with every single side character of the opposite gender. And people get told off for shipping lesbian coded characters with men or gay coded characters with women by the rest of the fandom. But it's always aroace coded main characters getting shipped with every single side character that exists. And aroace fans getting told to "not generalise the entire aspec community" and "let people ship whomever they want!! It's just fiction!!!" as if we don't deserve to see characters living happy lives not being in relationships. And my biggest pet peeve is the trope of an aroace coded character "growing up and maturing" by... getting in a romantic/sexual relationship. Really shows what these people think about non-partnering aspec people irl. It's not just about fictional characters but they'll never admit it 🤷

I will say that there are some idiots out there who do ship gay characters with the opposite sex because they believe in people being able to ship whatever they want (which can lead to some disturbing places but I digress) But those kinds of ships do get a lot more push back and the same people who get after people for changing characters from gay to straight do not have the same energy when it happens to aro /aroace characters.

These same people are the ones calling for representation and how we treat characters identities in fiction does reflect how we view those identities in the real world EXCEPT when it comes to aspec characters. Suddenly then it's "fiction doesn't effect reality!!!" there's some double standards happening and it's beyond frustrating that no one seems to even notice and get mad at us for pointing it out.

Not to mention it's incredibly funny to hear them cry "Don't generalize the community" while they generalize the community by acting like every aro/ace/aroace person can date and have sex - which like you said ignored the existence of non-partnering identities and I'd like to add it also erases repulsed identities.

None of these people actually care about the aspecs who date or have sex. they don't actually care how those identities work or those experiences at all. they're using them as a get out of jail free card. a loop hole. a "I can't be homophobic because I have a gay best friend" card. They don't care about QPRs and how those relationships can be experience in wildly different ways. All they care about is if they get to have two characters kiss without having to genuinely look at themselves and their biases and possibly have the revelation that they might hold bigoted beliefs about aspec people.

And at this point I'd rather them admit that they don't actually care about aspec identities or experiences instead of tying themselves into knots to try and prove "I'm not aphobic!!!!" because they actively tried to find a loop hole to make it so that they could feel superior and in the right for being able to erase an entire identity of people.

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

Lord of the Empty Isles

sci-fi/fantasy

set on a supposedly utopian planet recovering from a climate crisis, where bonds between people are able to be seen and manipulated (by some people)

follows a young man whose brother was cursed and killed by an infamous outlaw 5 years ago, and he’s finally able to curse him back - but it rebounds, as he’s somehow fatebound to the outlaw

to find a cure and save them both they have to team up, and he quickly finds out that the resources the outlaw is stealing go to the thousands of people neglected on prison planets, and he has to go against what he thought was right to help them

no romance, aroace MC, focus on platonic relationships

arc from netgalley, out june 6