#i always complained i can't get them in one frame properly and it's like on purpose?!

[raplinenthusiasts]

Outro: TEAR

© namuspromised

[777heavengirl]

bags

sirius black x reader (no longer just a one shot :3 ) ! warnings: the good kind of yearning.., friends to roommates to ?lovers?, bittersweetie, no war!au words count: 2,549 masterlist

a/n: might make a series of little blurbs as a continuation... undecided so lmk what u think!!!

Being friends with Sirius Black was the worst idea you could've ever had. It was hell. He was charming, awfully so. Flirty and caring with his friends in a way that made your heart skip a beat and your breath catch in your throat. He was the type of friend with no physical boundaries, his legs often thrown over yours, his arms often over your shoulders, lips whispering jokes into your ear.

It was an even worse idea to agree to move in with him after you graduated. James had gone off with Lily and Remus and Peter decided to split an apartment. Sirius, naturally, found one in the same building and dropped the twin key in your hand on graduation day, a wicked smile on his face. He hadn't even properly asked you. He had assumed, well he hoped, that you'd accept no matter what. He knew you had no other plans, no other place to go. He knew you'd love to because he knew you. Because he was your best friend.

So he didn't ask. The small silver dog keychain attached to the key was enough for you. 

The answer was always going to be yes. 

Living with Sirius meant a lot of things. It meant an abnormal amount of blankets and cushions thrown about, it meant the ever-growing collection of pictures framed on your walls or merely pasted on if Sirius had his way. Ever since Lily gifted him a muggle camera for graduation, he hadn't stopped taking pictures. Of your friends, of you in the kitchen or on your couch, your first night in the apartment he took pictures of your every move. He titled them all, in the back or on the bottom of it.

Darling brushing her teeth, 1st night in #717. You smiled through your toothbrush, shirt askew, with pajama pants that did not match in the slightest.

Doll’s first tea in #717 You couldn't see your face in this one, it was a closer shot of your hands around the teacup Lily bought you fifth year, the delicate flower pattern on the hard porcelain contrasting against the soft of your skin.

He titled them all, with his cursive loops and cloying nicknames. He’d even owl copies of them to your mom— why they even communicated was beyond you— you’d then have to repeatedly remind her, when your parents phoned, that 717 was your apartment number, and no mom I am not dating Sirius, yes I know he’s a wonderful guy, yes I’ll tell him you said hello. His photography habit had gotten so bad he even took pictures of the ladybug that seemed to live in the leaves of the small English Lavander that sat on your windowsill.

 Living with Sirius meant putting up with his tendency to ignore the fact that you needed to get a job, in fact, he'd drag you everywhere with him to avoid you even applying, his hand intertwined with yours, warm palms pressed against one another. He did it all the time, holding your hand, pressing a kiss against your temple when he insisted on getting into the crowded muggle metro more often than not, your bodies pressed together as he held you when the tube moved. Every time you complained, that he was holding you hostage, that at this pace you'd never find a job, he'd ask, with his head cocked to the side "Why do you have to get a job anyway? It's not like we need it"

"Sirius I need to make money," the tube shook the two of you, his arm instinctively wrapping around you to pull you closer as the other one maintained a white-knuckled grip on the bar above. "How am I going to afford anything? It’s been two years my savings are gone-"

"You don't need it though," his words were low on your ear, and carefree as if they didn't hold any importance. "I have more than enough to maintain us— for anything you might want" Your face heated, and you looked down hiding the surprise that you prayed he wouldn't see.

"I can't just bum off of you," your words were a timid mumble, and he barely heard you over the intercom announcing the station, if it wasn't because he had been tilted down close to your face, he might've not heard you at all. 

"You're not bumming off of me love, I want to take care of you, yea?" he pressed a kiss to the side of your hair, and you didn't refute. Not for now. Because in moments like these, when he acted like it was the most obvious answer in the world and didn't seem to give it a second thought, you could feel the words claw at your throat from the inside. A confession poisoning you from the inside out. 

But then he'd look at you.

With his gray eyes, the steel cool of them making your lungs expand wider than you thought possible and your heart beat out of your chest. So you'd decide, every time, that it wasn't the right moment. There was never a right time to tell your best friend and roommate that you were in love with him though. And through his piercing gaze, you thought he could see you using everything within you to hold back. 

You guessed it could be worse.

Being in love with Sirius Black was actually the worst thing to ever happen to you. It got even worse when you moved in together. Waking up to his shirtless self making you coffee the way you liked it, his head disheveled and unruly from bed but somehow just as gorgeous as when he had it fresh and styled, his long dark locks looking nothing short of heavenly in either form. It was the intimacy really— the domesticity of it all— that screwed you. Eating your eggs and toast over the soft tunes of his music, going to the market together, his fingers eventually finding yours as his other hand carried the shopping. His laundry mixed in with yours, falling asleep on the couch together, old muggle movies playing on the TV he bought four months after moving in. You still didn't have a stand for it, it sat on two boxes full of books. Neither of you minded, there was no rush after all. But then you thought of his unpacked bags and the singular box of belongings, it had been a bit more than two years since you moved in. Two years since you started the routine of getting dragged everywhere he went, spending your days lounging around with Sirius like nothing else mattered. But his trunk still housed half his belongings. His walls had a couple of pictures he had sellotaped on, and the large David Bowie poster he had bought the summer after sixth year, yet his clothes would go in and out of his trunk, and his closet sat mostly empty save the lone leather jacket he insisted on hanging. 

The thought of his lack of settling made your tummy twist in discomfort. 

But, again, you guessed it could be worse. Godric forbid you ever confess.

He'd be walking out the door with his bags.

You decided you'd be okay with letting it all rot inside of you. You didn't want to be too forward or rush into things when you, practically, knew he didn't feel the same. So you savored it, with everything you had in you. The stolen touches and even more stolen glances. The kiss he pressed against your cheek when he'd say goodbye, apparating away to go drink the night away with the rest of the marauders, James escaping from his soon-to-be father duties for a few hours. Sirius would press a kiss to your flushed cheeks when you'd go out with Lily as well, a small stay safe love, escaping his lips right before you slipped out the door.

"Tell him how I feel? Is pregnancy melting your brain, Lily?" You almost spit out your sweet cocktail. Lily flicked your forehead. 

"My brain is perfectly fine thank you very much," She huffed, the corners of her lips aching to break into a smile as she rubbed a hand over her pregnant belly.

"You two are practically together, you live together for Godric's sake" Marlene scoffed over her beer,

"Not to mention the shared bank account-" you slapped your forehead as Dorcas let the fact that he'd been basically spoiling you for a year slip, "And I've seen the way he looks at you sweets-" Dorcas's words were slurred by the alcohol in her system, and her head resting against Marlene's shoulder. "You don't look at someone that way unless you're in love with them"

Lily almost spit out her juice as she turned to you with wide eyes. "You got a shared vault now? James and I didn't even do that yet-"

You shook your head, "No no, crap Cas-" you took a shaky breath, as Marlene shook her head in disappointment and groaned out a small You're impossible. "He just keeps paying for things, and he won't let me get a job- honest, I've tried but he keeps planning things and I just never have any time-"

"So is he holding you captive or- I just don't see why you can't get a job" The three girls looked at you, incredulous looks on their faces as you struggled to explain.

"He just keeps saying to not worry-" You hid behind your hands now, embarrassment crawling up your neck. "I don't know- It's complete rubbish, he's insistent on the fact that he wants to take care of me" The girls let out a collective 'aww', all screaming eagerly over each other

"I should've kept it all to myself" you mumbled as you raised your now-empty glass at your waitress, the older woman shooting you a nod as she went to bring you another one. The girls booed at you, 

"Now that'd be no fun would it?" Lily shoved your shoulder playfully, Marlene and Dorcas giggling in agreement. 

Tell him how you feel.

The thought bounced in your head as you trudged up to your apartment. Fumbling with the keys as you tried to steady yourself. But you didn't need to, as Sirius opened the door. His shirt missing and his burgundy red pajama pants sat loosely at his hips, but you knew he hadn't slept yet. Otherwise, you would've been able to tell— his hair would be a mess, as he tended to bury his head between his pillows, blocking the world away while he slept.

"I could hear you fumbling your keys from down the hall doll" you giggled as you entered, your body instinctively falling into his for a hug. He couldn't help but laugh either, your cheek pressed against his chest as you mumbled out a thank you. The couple of drinks you had made you feel more than loose, giggly and you couldn't help but let the words slip from your lips.

"I love you, terribly so" you'd probably regret such a statement in the morning.

"I love you too darling" you groaned out a no as you peeled yourself off, it poured out of you instinctively. You threw yourself on the soft couch James's parents had given the two of you. We're throwing it out anyway lovies you keep it. You were sure, by Euphemia's playful glint, that this wasn't quite the case. But you appreciated it, the plush sofa softening your intentional fall. Sirius laughed as he approached the couch, crouching next to where your face was smushed into the smooth material of the sofa. His fingers moved the hair away from your face, his eyes locking in with yours as his lips split into a lazy smile.

"Knew you'd make fun of me," You mumbled and his lips twisted into an exaggerated pout now, repressing the need to laugh and you buried your face into the cushions with another groan. 

He would've been lying if he said his heart hadn't skipped a beat, a flicker of hope that maybe, you felt as he did. Maybe your heart ran quicker when he held your hand, maybe the goodnight kisses you pressed against his cheek, against his forehead meant more, maybe the smile you had given him when he presented you with the key to your shared apartment, the smile that made him feel as if he was staring straight into the sun, meant something more. 

But for now, that would have to wait.

As he got you up and into the bathroom, wiping your makeup off with a damp cloth, you gave a mumbled slurred summary of your night. He made you close your eyes as he wiped away the mascara, and you listed the vague number of drinks you'd had— plus the drinks you had to make up for Lily’s inability to drink right now, Marlene’s idea of course. His fingers curled around your chin as he moved your face, and at any other moment, you would've been positively frazzled. But as you spoke of the shaky walk home after Marlene dropped you off down the street, you could only revel in his touch as he hummed along and got you ready for bed. The stubborn lipstick made his cheeks flush as he wiped at your lips repeatedly, making them look plump and if he hadn't had the ounce of self-control he still vaguely maintained he would've kissed you right there and then. But it just wasn't the time for it, there's never a right time to tell your best friend and roommate you're in love with them, is there?

Stumbling around the room with you, the pajamas he managed to get over your form as he tried not to look at you in your underwear— not that you cared at the minute— it all made his heart swell. A stolen moment for him to think on later, the small giggles that escaped your face, or the innocent clutch you had on his hand. You ran your fingers down the features of his face as he helped you lay down. He tucked you into your bed with a kiss on your cheek and a giggle erupting from your chest.

His heart ached with longing but he guessed it could be worse. 

You could've said no to living with him. 

You gave him a faux pout, and he mirrored it. 

"What is it lovely?" 

"Missed you tonight-" he could feel the crimson intensify in his cheeks at your words, but he ignored the flush and moved a stray hair away from your face. 

"I missed you too love, next time let's go together yeah?" You hummed in agreement, a small love you slipping past right as your eyes fluttered shut, sleep covering you like a blanket.

"I fear I might be in love with you doll," he sighed, yet you didn't answer to his whispered confession. Your chest rose and fell steadily. Part of him was glad, the thought of your reaction to his feelings chilling him to the core. It could be worse, he thought. 

Yes, he'd rather have this than nothing at all. Godric forbid he ever confesses.

You'd be walking out the door with your bags.

[oracle-of-dream]

Submissive and huh?

Minors DNI

Summary: Your friend Taerae recently learned a new term and wants your thoughts. Explaining it might help him understand properly, but do you have the strength to tell him.

Warnings: Male Reader, Idol Taerae, Student Reader, Lewd faces/Ahegao, Mention of arousal and breeding

Wordcount: 1.2k

Math classes had been kicking your ass all semester and tutoring from the professor wasn't working out. You'd ended up being assigned a study partner. The program was meant for students struggling with the class to help each other. That's how you met Taerae. 

He didn't originally introduce himself as an idol, especially since it was an online class. No one had seen his face. But when you met up with him for the first time to study together, you instantly recognized him from TV. You hit it off over a shared hate for math and spent more time together outside class.

He'd complain about his idol life issues and you'd give him any notes from class he'd missed.

You'd just gotten home from a late-night study session at the library. As if it knew, your phone lit up with a text as you sat on your bed.

TR: Yo! Y/N, I met some fans while out with the members today!

YN: Cool. Don't you meet fans wherever you go?

TR: Well these stuck out!

YN: How?

TR: Well, I noticed them, a bunch of guys, giggling in the convenience store and pointing at me and Hao while we were shopping. I didn't want to embarrass them so I just played it cool and ignored them. But then they came up to me!

YN: Okay, some brave fans? That's it?

TR: Just wait a sec! 

TR: They came to me and told me they were fans. But more specifically, MY fans! Of course, I was happy to hear, but they were foreigners because they used a term I didn’t know.

YN: What term?

TR: Submissive and Breedable?

TR: I know what submissive means, they mean I'm not an aggressive person. That's not entirely true, but I'm submissive at times.

You looked at your phone, blinking a few times. Some "fans" dared to say that!?

TR: I can't find anything when I look it up, it's probably slang, right?

Maybe telling him that his fans want to breed him wasn't the best thing to tell your friend. He was just too wholesome for that.

YN: Yeah, it is, but it's not something cool. No one says it really, it's not the trend anymore.

TR: Really? I know trends, I'm not old, but I haven’t heard of that.

YN: See? There's no reason to worry, just fans being weird.

TR: Well, the photo they wanted was also...off.

YN: Off how?

TR: They wanted me to stick my tongue out and look up at the camera, which was super high above me. To be honest–it felt a little embarrassing to pose like that.

You shook your head trying not to imagine his cute self making lewd faces for a group of boys, but it was hard. And so were you.

YN: You should be more careful, they could use photos like that weirdly.

TR: What do you mean?

YN: Let's drop it. Subject change, what are you doing now?

TR: I'm getting ready for bed, I just got under the covers.

You looked at the clock, midnight was on its face.

YN: Oh shit, I didn't even realize. You should sleep!

TR: No, no, I'm pretty awake. Plus, it's nice talking to you. Did you want to video call while you get ready for bed?

You’d done it before, talking on video call into the night, but it was always a little like Taerae just wanted to see you.

YN: Sure, I'll call you.

You pressed the video call button on your phone. It showed your reflection as you waited, automatically you straightened your hair a little and kicked some stuff on the floor out of frame.

Taerae answered the phone with a smile, the camera close to his face.

You laughed as you set your phone on your desk, "Well hello to you too, why so close?"

"No reason, I just want to see you closely."

"Well, I can see you so closely I can count your pores," You scoffed as you went into your closet to find pajamas for the night.

"Is it weird I'm holding it so close?"

"A little, but it's no big deal. If you don't wanna show yourself then why'd you wanna video call?"

Taerae didn't answer.

"Are you still thinking about what those guys said?"

He shuffled in bed, "Mmhm."

"I promise it's nothing bad."

"Then why don't you just tell me?"

You sighed, "Okay, fine, I'll spill."

Taerae's eyes peered curiously at the camera as he waited for you to come out of your closet. You settled on wearing a long-sleeved T-shirt and shorts. You returned to find Taerae's eyes filled with impatience.

You swallowed awkwardly, "You already know what the submissive part means, but the other part..."

"Breedable," Taerae reminded you.

"Yeah–It means," You struggled to find a good way to break it to him with that look in his eyes. So full of trust and purity. "It means, they wanna do it with you."

Taerae's expression dropped into surprise, "Oh, that's it? I read about that kind of stuff of fans wanting me to have sex with them. That's not so bad."

"Well, breedable means, specifically where you'd be the one getting fucked. Likely by a man. Who wants to... finish in you."

You couldn't bring yourself to look at the screen to see his expression. He'd fallen silent, thinking of a response. It felt like ten minutes passed until he broke the silence.

Taerae's voice was deep and serious, "Y/n."

"Yeah?"

"Look at the screen." You looked at the screen to see Taerae in bed, holding the camera above him to show off his shirtless torso that was mostly covered by the bed sheet except for his collarbone and neck. "Am I breedable right now?"

You felt warm in your face as you answered, "Yeah, I-I guess."

"Submissive, too?"

"Sure," You said as you looked down at your hands.

"Yes or no! Sure isn't good enough, and look at me!"

You complied, looking at him. He smiled before making a face; his eyes looking up at the camera as he stuck out his tongue and held up a peace sign with his other hand.

"Jesus, Taerae!" You looked away quickly. Your heart was in your ears, pounding as the image of sweet Taerae's lewd face was plastered behind your eyelids.

He laughed loudly. "I am, aren't I? Submissive and breedable. I take it as a compliment, they like me that much! To be honest, you look all shy... You look a little submissive too."

You moved your phone so he couldn't see you anymore.

"I was kidding! Don't hide from me!" Taerae's muffled voice shouted from the speaker of your phone. 

After you calmed down, you turned your phone back over to see him still there. Still shirtless, and holding his phone at the same seductive angle.

"You're so weird!" You yelled at Taerae, who just giggled.

"And you still like me anyway. Even with all my breedable energy."

"I'm going to hang up–"

"What!? We gotta see you do the pose too, what if you're more breedable than me, we should test how–"

You cut him off as you pressed the red dial button. You turned your phone off before he could call you again. You lay in bed, alone in the dark, thinking about Taerae's face.

And in the privacy of your home, you test if you can also feel submissive and breedable, making Taerae's new iconic look. A secret he'll never know about... As if you didn't already have a big secret.

[misstycloud]

Unfortunate Love

Yandere childhood friend x taken GNreader

—————

Finn took a deep breath, a poor attempt to loosen his nerves. He had all reasons to be nervous, he was finally getting to see his long-time best friend after so many years. While they did speak on the phone and spent hours sending texts back and forth between their devices, it was nothing compared to the real thing. The blonde's felt his heart thump loudly against his chest, reminding him of all those moments in their youth when he was painfully in love with his friend and they had no clue.

Hah, they still don't! (Y/n), his bestie who doesn't know how they make him feel every time they speak. (Y/n) who had no idea of the lovesick gazes he would send them whenever they weren't looking. (Y/n) who was oblivious to his feelings for years, somehow never realising despite it staring them straight in the eyes. (Y/n) who remained clueless to his despair the day they announced their relationship. (Y/n) who never saw him on the floor in his room, covered with snot and ears, desperately crying for them.

Finn dubble checked his phone to make sure he was at the right address, it would be embarrassing to hype himself up only to be met with an old lady in the doorway. Geez, he knew (Y/n) would laugh their ass of if that happened and he'd rather not be ridiculed during their first reunion in so long. He smiled at the thought, god how he loved that laugh.

His friend always complained they hated it, but he found it cute and always reassured there was nothing to be ashamed of, even if they sounded like a 'dying-elephant-choking-on-its-own-trunk-while-having-a-cold-and-birthing-a-new-elephant.'

After just a few seconds after knocking on the wooden frame, the door swung open and he laid eyes on the most important person in his life.

"Oh my god, Finn!" You exclaimed in joy at the sight. "I haven't seen you like this in ages. It's great that you could come, I can't wait to show you everything I've told you about."

He giggled at your enthusiasm, it was always like this, you lifting him up and making him see the beauty in things he would otherwise pay no mind to.

You pulled Finn inside your apartment, excited to exhibit your home to him. "We've gotten a bunch of plants- to make the air in here fresh you know- and even started our own little plantation on the balcony. There are lots up on the roof, too. It's accessible to everyone in the building so we're not the only ones doing this. Oh, and there's a pool you can use! It's awesome for parties."

As the blonde man was getting sucked into your babble, one word in your speech painfully stuck out to him: We. Oh, right. He almost forgot. Your not alone living in this home.

"(Y/n), have you seen the wine? I wanted to bring it out for when- oh!" Finn looked passed you and saw a tall, handsome brunette make his way around the corner and meet eyes with him. "Why didn't you say he arrived already?" He chuckled and wrapped his arm around your waist. "Trying to make me look bad, are we?" Your boyfriend teased you.

You slapped his arm, "Of course not, just got a bit caught up in the conversation, Eric. And I put the wine in the second box in the fridge, it's behind a bunch of other stuff so it's hard to see."

"Haha, okay, was getting panicky there." Eric stepped forward to properly greet his guest. "Hey, I'm Eric as you probably already know."

"Finn." He responded dryly, but if the other man noticed, he didn't express it. Or perhaps he simply didn't care.

"It's fun to meet one of (Y/n)'s old friends, I know you two go way back." Ushering his partner's childhood friend further inside, he spoke, "I hope the trip wasn't too much of a hassle, wouldn't want this to be of any trouble for you."

Of course it wasn't any trouble, Finn wanted to snap. But he wasn't dumb enough to do that. He understood what would happen if he acted upon his feelings.

“No, there were no issues.”

The three of you sat down in the living room, pouring the liquid evenly and getting the conversation started. Finn found himself multiple times wanting to throw your partner against the wall. It was so unfair. Everything was. Why did Eric get to live with you and he didn't? He knew you way better than your own boyfriend. You two have been together since you were crawling around in diapers. What could possibly beat that?

He was there when you lost your first tooth. He was there when you first learned to ride a bike, when you got that job at the ice cream shop in the plaza, and moved out of your parents house. All the important moments in your life, he had been present. And what the hell has Eric done except watering some plants with you? It was laughable. Anyone could see he was not worthy of being your boyfriend. Finn would do anything for you and he doubted the same could be said for Mr. Gardner.

A part of him was ashamed at the unethical length he was willing to go, but on the other hand those feeling were washed away when he saw you beaming at him. It was all worth it if it was for you.

You and Eric were retelling funny stories of your time in the city while Finn was writhing in envy, glaring slightly in the other man's direction, not that you noticed of course. Dinner rolled around and you served your friend with great eagerness, you have been working on your culinary skills for a while now and it was time to see if the work had payed off. The brunette had endured as your Guinea pig and said it tasted good, but you insisted the true test was giving the food to someone else.

"How is it?"

Finn gasped for added affect, "It's amazing (Y/n)! You're a fantastic chef, this is definitely the best meal I've ever had." He praised, and your ego nearly boosted through the roof.

Your cheeks dusted a light pink. "Haha, well thanks. It's not that good, but I appreciate it."

The blonde man simply smiled in content. The truth was, the dish was in fact not that good. It wasn't bad by any means, however it wouldn't win any award. The past was cooked too long and the sauce had a burnt taste to it. Despite all these factors, it was without a doubt the best meal he ever had. Because it was something you had made for him with your own hands. Even the ingredients were ones you'd grown by yourself. (Partly with your sweetheart's help, but Finn pretended not to know.)

You really were his true love. Which is why it is so sad. He wasn't sure if he could love anyone other than you. After he found out about your relationship status the young man tried to make himself like someone else; not everything works out the way we wish them to and he was therefore forced to live with his unrequited love.

"Actually, there's another reason we wanted you to visit." You joyfully mentioned. "It's pretty important."

Your friend chewed his food and gave you a nod, signaling you to continue your speech. He wondered what is was. It appeared to be a big deal, but he assumed it wasn't anything bad judging from your happy expression, one that was mirroring the brunette's. A dreadful feeling formed in his gut. He didn't like this.

"Well," you started, coyly. "Me and Eric have been dating for a long time now, and we want to take the next step in our lives together."

No, he really didn't like where this was going.

"So, we made the decision to-" you could barely contain your smile, " get married!"

Something in him shattered. Married? You? To someone else. Fuck, he wanted to cry. But that would definitely set you off into a worrying mess, something he'd rather avoid. No, no , no, he thought. It can't be! Although he tried to contain his emotions as best he could, it appeared som e of it slipped passed the mask.

"Hey, you good man?" Eric asked.

This comment attracted your attention, "Huh, are you not feeling well, Finn?" Fretting over his condition only served to worsen the situation, reminding him of what he couldn't have.

In the end he had to excuse himself and lie that he did feel a bit sick, and that he had been for a while but thought he would be fine after a while. You were sad that he had to leave so soon and wished him well. Escorting him to the door, you said to him, "Sad you're not 100% top today."

"Ehehe, yeah...." he awkwardly scratched the back of his head. Technically it wasn't a lie, he did want to go and bury himself in a corner, though it was for other reasons entirely.

"Are you sure you don't want to spend the night here, it's no problem?" Oh how good willed you were, offering up space in your home to stop your friend from having to spend money on a hotel. Normally he'd love to spend the night, this time however, he didn't believe it to be a wise idea for any of you.

"Yeah I'm sure. I'll just get a hotel room not far away and then I'll drive back home tomorrow."

"Okay, maybe we can hangout before you go if you're better tomorrow?" You asked hopefully. "Just you and me like old days."

This made him smile. Just you and him. That sounded good. He agreed to your request and hugged you goodbye for the night. You waved to him from the window when he'd made his way outside and into his car. Watching Finn drive away, you felt a hand sneak itself around your waist.

"Think he'll be alright?" A deep voice sounded from behind you.

"Yes, it'll be all fine. Nothing a goodnight's rest can't fix." You assured. Though, something about your friend's reaction didn't sit right with you. He should be over the moon of your engagement, he seemed nothing like that. If anything, he looked...pained?

//////

Back in the car, the volume from the speakers were loud enough to burst one's eardrums. But that didn't matter the the driver. No he had a lot more to think about. The blaring music did nothing to ease the pain or distract him, which left him misrable.

Why the hell did you have to get engaged. Couldn't you have been fine as it was. Now, it was more serious than ever. In the beginning, he had actually hoped that you would eventually break up. That wouldn't happen now. Now it was legit. Legal papers and documents and everything. What was next on the list, kids?

Finn heaved a heavy breath, releasing a mix between a gurgle and sob. Tears streamed down his cheeks and he slowed the vehicle to a stop by the deserted road. The darkness kept people from seeing his sorry state; not that there were any out to begin with. Slamming his fist on the dashboard, he yelled his pain.

Why do love hurt so much?

[charkoal]

Hi! I've read some of your Arcane posts and I was curious to ask what do you think/how do you interpret Vi rejoining the enforcers after the breakup? I haven't read anyone doing an actual analysis on it, most people complain that she's "washed" or that the writers hate her, which doesn't feel like doing a deep dive into her character at all. Thank! Have a lovely day.

Hi! I'll preface by saying I'm not a league player so while I know general lore, most of this will be my personal take and headcanons to fit what I know of where Vi and Caitlyn up in the game.

Vi as a character has always been driven by her loved ones and her need to protect. It's both her greatest strength and her fatal flaw. And I think initially this may be what causes her to re-enter a system she has always stood against. Caitlyn doesn't ask Vi to put the badge on again, would never ask that of her. In fact, I don't think Caitlyn herself wants to go back to the enforcers at first, what with all the guilt from her time as the Commander. She doesn't trust herself to hold that power, and even if she did, she would make sure Vi is okay with her joining before doing anything. And she wouldn't ask Vi in the first place because she'd never want to put Vi in that position, so she would never go back even if she wanted to. I think it's imperative that Vi approaches Caitlyn about it, decides for herself that this is something she wants to do. That's the only way either of them goes back.

Caitlyn is probably talking about some document or other that's made its way onto her desk amongst the numerous piles of papers, detailing how the council is trying to decide what to do with the enforcers. She isn't in the council, but she is still heavily involved in the relief efforts for both Piltover and Zaun. She mentions reading the council's proposed reforms, how she's weary to trust anyone to execute the overhaul properly, and how she thinks they might be better off abolishing the enforcers as a whole and rebuilding from the ground up.

And Vi just knows. Knows that whoever the council picks will never measure up. Knows that she can't stand to watch another generation of kids grow up in fear of those who are supposed to protect them. Knows that she doesn't trust anyone else with this but Caitlyn.

Caitlyn, and maybe herself.

She tells Caitlyn as much. And Caitlyn hesitates, says she shouldn't hold that kind of power again. Refuses to cause any more hurt than she already has, wonders how Vi can still place her trust in her after everything, especially with this.

And Vi just takes Caitlyn's face in her hands and tells her she trusts her because she knows her. Promises she won't do it alone this time, promises "together" and—

And well, Caitlyn has never been able to say no to Vi.

Neither of them are naive enough to think it will be a quick or easy process. Caitlyn is there to make the enforcers better. Vi is there to keep them from getting worse.

Caitlyn creates new policies, roots out corruption, sets the example as sheriff. Vi ensures that that example is followed. She's boots on the ground, leading the enforcers with an iron fist and greeting Zaunites with a gentle heart. Setting her own example even if she doesn't realize it.

Vi couldn't care less about the enforcers. She cares about Caitlyn and she cares about Zaun. Wearing the badge lets her keep other enforcers in check without being framed as an instigator and arrested immediately. She can keep a watchful eye, ensure that at least while she's around, the enforcers won't abuse their power in the name of the law. It might seem small or trivial, one person against dozens, but I don't think Vi has ever been an aerial view kind of person. She can't just trust that the enforcers are getting better, even if there are less incident reports and less arrests being made. She has to witness the change herself, has to look into the face of each and every person she encounters while wearing the badge and see to it that they are not mistreated. She needs them to see a friendly face. And even if some call her a traitor, a deserter, she takes it all in stride. If the price she pays for keeping an enforcer's baton from striking innocent flesh is petty names and the mocking lilt of "lapdog," then she'll shoulder that title gladly.

She wants better for the children of Zaun, better than what she had. That's always been the core of her character, to give to others what she never got. It's even vocalized by her in the first act of season one. She doesn't want kids to grow up without parents, taken by the very people who are supposed to protect. She doesn't want them to feel like they have no one to turn to, no one on their side. She doesn't want them to feel lesser. She wants them to see her and know that as long as she's there, no one will hurt them. And maybe, in the future, it won't just be her and Caitlyn they can go to. Maybe the number of friendly faces can grow.

With Caitlyn spearheading change at the top level, I think Vi believes one day they can achieve that. But it takes a long time for water to trickle from a river to the ocean, and so while they wait for that day to come, Vi will be there to make sure the well doesn't dry up.

That's at least my take on it, I hope you enjoyed my thoughts. Have a good one!

[lovettery]

The Start To A Beautiful Future With You ♡

Including : Your favs <3

There's no specific gender for the reader, but there are some descriptions of feminine features!

Not read over before posting

Slipping off your work clothes that are now stained with the grimy air of the sweltering summer day outside, you step under the warm comforting stream of water pouring down.

You keep checking your phone every now and then just to see if you've received any new messages from him, your head light and fuzzy each time.

Around an hour ago your boyfriend messaged saying he wanted to treat you tonight and to meet him down at the bridge just before the beach at 9:00 as the sun sets.

Reading the message over and over again your heart swelled. You didn't get the opportunity to go on a date often because of his busy schedule and your demanding job so you couldn't fight the smile plastered on your face.

Excited for the date, you wash your hair and dress into that one outfit you know that always gets his heart racing, softly placing any jewellery on that would make your outfit pop just that little bit more.

You rush your way down to the location, checking the time every 5 seconds just to make sure the clocks hadn't betrayed you suddenly when you finally see him at the bridge.

His gorgeous hair framed his face making his eyes and jawline stand out, your heart pounding with every step closer you take. His black suit fitting his body perfectly, muscles more pronounced than you've ever seen them before.

His eyes lock onto yours and you see them open slightly at the sight of you before trailing down and back up your body, his chest hitching for just a moment.

"Hey.." He says, barely above a whisper, his eyes staring at you lovingly yet you notice a slight bit of nervousness in his tone.

He inches closer to you, grabbing your waist and leaving a soft kiss on your lips. A smidge of your lipstick staining his lips, you can't help but laugh at it.

"Hi" you whisper back. His nose touching yours as you both gaze into eachothers eyes. No matter how long you've been together, no matter how many arguments you've had, you've never stopped looking at eachother with the same passion and adoration you did that one spring night.

"You look so beautiful baby, at this rate we won't make it to the beach" He says with a dopey smile on his face, you slap his shoulder gently and he laughs in response, his grip on your waist tightening.

"We should get moving, but before that.." He says before trailing off, his hands now off your waist and instead searching through his bag before bringing out a thin black cloth.

You stare at him in shock. Right here? I mean not that you would complain but..

As if immediately guessing your thoughts he let's out a low chuckle. "No sweetheart, not now atleast. Come here" He says sweetly, tying the cloth around your eyes, blinding you.

You grab onto his arm and let him pull you forward, leading you. You can feel his pulse racing from your position, yours the exact same.

You can feel him shift from your side to instead stand behind you, his hands now caressing both of your arms, his breath prickling the nerves in your ears. The excitement in your stomach is too much and you can't help but feel like you'll explode if you don't look now.

"I'm taking it off you now okay baby" He states, his hands tightening on your arms for a second before slipping away, leaving a warm sensation in its place. You feel the black cloth around your eyes come lose before being taken away completely.

You blink a few times to properly adjust your vision before your struck with the beautiful sight of the date he's set up just for you.

A warm orange and pink sunset shining down onto golden sand and calm light blue waves. A blanket lays on the sand with baskets full of your favourite foods, bottles of your favourite drink and a bouquet of your favourite flowers. All with your favourite person.

You bring a hand to your mouth to stifle a gasp and to (attempt) to hide the tears which will inevitably fall. Your heart is pounding, fighting against your ribcage for freedom and your legs feel weak and brittle.

You turn to look at him behind you, your eyes still wide with shock. "Is this really all for me" You ask him, your voice squeaky as salty tears like your flustered cheeks.

"Of course it is baby, you deserve it. You've been working so hard lately and I know we haven't been able to spend so much time together so I wanted this night to be special for us. To make up for that lost time."

Your heart melts at his kind romantic words, grabbing his face and leaving a gentle yet intimate kiss on his lips, his hands holding you like a treasure.

Excited, you grab his hand and rush over the beautiful sight. The both of you sit down onto the soft blanket watching the gentle waves crash elegantly, your hands intertwined his thumb brushing against your soft skin.

"Oh and there's one more suprise I have for you sweetheart" His honey-like voice rings in your ears, that nervousness you noticed on his features now there once again, a noticeable wrinkle between his eyebrows. But you wait patiently for his next act.

He stands up, bringing you with him, grabbing both of your hands and laying a fluttering kiss onto them before letting them drop to your sides.

The salty wind runs through his hair, the gorgeous orange light resting on his beautiful features and the yellow sand complimenting his perfectly-chosen outfit.

You gasp to yourself as he lowers himself down onto one knee, his eyes looking up at you with passion yet panic.

You feel your heart pulsing wildly, you panic momentarily that maybe you're about to die from how violent your heart is, your legs and arms shake gently and your eyes filling with tears of love as you stare into his gorgeous eyes.

"Darling, we've been together for so long now and everyday I've grown to love you more and more. I can't imagine my life without you, I can't imagine a day I wake up without you there. I love you so much baby. Would you give me the honour of a lifetime and marry me?"

Your both hands now over your mouth, tears running down your face wildly.

"Oh honey, of course I will I'd love to" You yell, your voice cracking just that little bit as you throw yourself at him, holding him closely to you as if you could merge together to make one.

He slides the ring onto your finger gently, his hands resting on yours, caressing your palm.

"I can't wait to start a beautiful future with you"

Thank you so much for reading and I hope you enjoyed it! This is my first time trying to write a fanfic like this so I hope it isn't too bad !

I appreciate all of you and all the love on my last post thank you all so so much, I love you all ♡♡

Masterlist ~☆

[starberry-cupcake]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY @lady-harrowhark !!!! ♥ ♥ ♥

This will be sent to you physically as soon as I can, because I didn't know when to stop and it became a Thing. I took a photo with the candlesticks in the mantle for both aesthetic purposes and scale. Once I decided I was gonna send it over, I kept doing things to it and ended up with this, I hope you like it!!! I want to make you another hand-made extra thing to send with it, as a treat.

I'm posting it in the recaps tag because the recaps wouldn't exist without you ♥ Thank you for teaching me how to bake apple pie, for having all the tlt facts I need, for sending me the Most Curated memes and overall for being my friend and putting up with me for So SO Long T_T You're awesome!!! I couldn't make something for you every year because it's often vacations time but, now that I can, you get an Extra one to make up for the rest.

Process pictures and some alternate versions in read-more, because you should see the versions that were peer reviewed until I landed on this one (and have a better look at the texture of the paper).

You can click on the pictures to see them better, if you must.

So, I was gonna do something shadow-related at first. I wanted to do paper cut-outs and was going over the idea of doing something with shadows and light.

And, even though drawing isn't my thing, I decided to hand draw everything anyway. Which is why I'd like to be given leeway on scale, it wasn't meant to be realistic, I can't do that. Then, I carved everything with an exacto. And decided on which thing would be cut out and what wouldn't be on the fly, so of course I almost ruin everything a bunch of times.

I was going to flip everything around to use it without the pencil guidelines and, when I saw how it turned out, I kind of liked it??? I thought using them for shadows would be a waste? I didn't expect to like them that much, paper!Harrow won my heart.

So, I went with this other idea of using tracing paper for layering. But also, I decided to use as the background some of my spider embossed black paper (that I got for the Mr Spider book I never finished). When I saw the combinations, I was conflicted, because I liked the eerie effect of the tracing paper but the details got lost. So I made three trial versions and asked around.

One had no paper, another had one and the last had one between Harrow and the rest of the stuff and another one in front of Harrow. Nobody liked the paper lol The consensus was that the spider texture looked good and the cut-outs looked nice enough to be properly seen. If you disagree, we can always put paper on top! I sure would have loved to have known this would be my final choice when gluing these pieces, so I would have chosen something more resistant for my peace of mind, but alas, it is what it is.

By this point, I knew I was going to send it over, so I went bonkers with the frame and hand painted a lot of bones with the Ninth House skull in the top of it, then gave it a varnish on top. My back is complaining now, but I think it gave it Something Extra.

ANYWAY, I didn't want to make this so long but I wanted to show the other versions, just in case!!

[hannahhook7744]

Augusto Collodi- Rossi Hc ?

His full name is Augusto Wayne Collodi-Rossi.

He goes by August or Auggie for short.

He's eighteen years old by d1 and twenty years old by d3.

He's the second youngest child of Geppetto and Carina.

August has 5 older siblings (four older brothers and one older sister) and one younger sister.

His older siblings are Gustavo (Geppetto's dead son from his first marriage), Lampwick (fourteen years older), James (almost thirteen years older), Pinocchio (almost eleven years older), and Bella (almost seven years older).

His younger sister is Valentina, who is younger than he is by a year.

August has been described as shy and a bit of a loner but anyone who knows him well knows that he is also snarky, determined, patient, and a creative thinker.

He wants to be either a toy maker, a botanist, ir a hairdresser when he's older.

The redhead idolizes Lampwick, he is August's hero and August wants to be just like him when he's older.

He idolizes Lampwick so much that when he was younger, he was too shy to talk to him. He had the older redhead convinced that he hated him for a good while because of this.

August has pale skin, freckles, blue eyes, high cheekbones, and short auburn hair. Recently he dyed a streak of said hair blonde. He also has a mole on his cheek.

He, unlike the rest of his siblings, has glasses. Round, golden framed glasses with THICK lens because his eyesight is awful.

His favorite colors are gold, green, red, and white.

He has a yellow pet iguana with green eyes that he named 'Envy'.

August wears makeup.

August's favorite ice cream flavor is honey. His siblings all think this is weird.

He was voted Castlecoming King as a joke. Jokes on everyone who voted for him though, because he wasn't even at the dance and the only ones who got embarrassed by this was the ones who set it since they got overheard complaining that they didn't get to see his reaction to their prank (which got them scolded harshly by Fairy Godmother).

August is always wearing something with a floral pattern on it.

His ears, lip, and eyebrow are pierced.

August stress cleans.

If the eighteen year old doesn't want to be found, he won't be.

He can't sit in a chair properly. Seriously, man is always sitting with his legs crossed or sitting backwards.

He is almost always wearing four watches. This is because he was gifted each one of those watches and doesn't want to look like he's playing favorites or lose one.

August collects pins and has been gifted many, and can almost always be seen wearing one.

August's favorite holiday is Easter. Yes, he still participates in Easter egg hunts.

When he was a kid, Valentina helped him bury himself (don't worry they didn't bury his head. Just his body).

August gets along great with Tiger Peony, Amelia, Bianca, and the Badun cousins.

Wanted to be a hunter of Artemis when he was younger before he found out it was only for girls. Bella and Valentina still tease him about it.

He dyed his own hair.

August is an angry crier. Or just a crier in general (he hates this).

His favorite show is 'The Real Princesses of Charmingsville' because he likes the drama.

He was a cheerleader and a part of the Auradon Prep Nature/Gardening Club, as well as the Art Club.

August has a royallr (auradon tumblr) and an InstaRoyal account where he mainly posts his art.

He also has an Auratube account he rarely posts on where he teaches people different ways to draw, how to fix/build things, and how to do different hair styles and how to care for different plants.

Occasionally he will post about things you absolutely should not do with your pet iguana: "IGUANAS ARE COLD-BLOODED, DAMN IT, HE SHOULD NOT BE OUT IN THE SNOW. NO I DON'T CARE THAT YOU HAVE HIM DRESSED UP IN A CUTE OUTFIT, YOU ARE GOING TO KILL HIM BECAUSE HE'S NOT WARM ENOUGH!"

August loves to go go-karting and candle making. He also knows how to find people and how to pick locks.

The Dragon Slayers are his favorite band before he discovers the Bad Apples and Dark Devotion.

August loves banana curry pizza.

His favorite candy is gummi snakes.

August has been grounded the least out of his siblings: he's been grounded exactly once. It was because he shared a couple of the videos from the School of Secrets web series in one of his Auratube videos.

The videos being "Team", "Broken", and "Attention". He was grounded because Carina didn't like how he made cotnent out three videos of people's humiliation.

Don't worry he took the video down.

He doesn't always think things through.

He works at Geppetto and Sons' Workshop.

August lives at an apartment in Auradon City.

He has Acrophobia and anxiety.

He likes comic books, superhero movies, going to concerts, going to see plays, acting, drawing, and trying different foods.

He has a girlfriend named Tiffany. She's the daughter of a baroness.

[jisuto]

On the topic of game reception, what are your thoughts on the current state of pokemon?

OK THIS ASK WAS SENT BEFORE THE HUGE LEAK LOL but I have a lot to say:

I watched VHS tapes, played the games, and owned merch since a young age so the series is very special to me. But I don't like the current direction at all and it's not because of the designs or nostalgia. The quality and game performance plummeted so how can I enjoy playing when there's mad lag or low frame rate that hinders my progress and worsen the experience??

It took too many years for them to realize they need to put quality over quantity after the SWSH mess, seeing that they can get away with pretty much ANYTHING and still make huge profit. You see people say that Pokemon should've never went 3D and stay 2D but tbh, it's a series that improves it's graphics as technology advances so it's not a surprise for them to finally go 3D and personally I think that's fine but just keep it looking good and fun (though I would love a 2D/3D hybrid). XY introduced a lot of new features but still lacked in some aspects that still haven't really been solved or added.

Reusing assets is common in the industry but only to a certain extent. They claimed that SWSH was taking a while to make because they were making brand new models which turned out to be a lie and they look like bootleg figures with the new lighting. The 3DS models were ripped from Pokepark, including some animations, but a lot of them still barely have any character. They have their own in-house team (Creatures Inc) so they made the decision NOT to have pokemon properly animated or look alive.... Also they made spin-offs like Ranger, Colosseum, Pokepark, and Pokken which look AMAZING

FRLG took only one year while HGSS was being developed at the same time as Platinum and took 3 years to finish that turned into one of the best games and remakes ever made. As the franchise expands, the team also needs to add more manpower but Game Freak can definitely afford to get more resources to help them?? They can't continue having a ragtag team of like 20 people to make a game back then and do the same now then expect good results... Hire more people who know how create with current gen consoles IT'S COMMON SENSE PLS also I can't believe they had a different company create BDSP knowing how beloved and groundbreaking DPPT was?? No redesigns like the previous remakes and thought it was a good idea to keep it looking a carbon copy to the DS style...

Also it's shocking to see how fan reception can change how the devs direct the next gen ESPECIALLY when it's not even real constructive criticism?? When Unova came out, I remember seeing all the online outcry about "OH THEY HAVE AN ICE CREAM CONE POKEMON AND A TRASH BAG, THEY'RE RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS EW" then actually hear it being repeated at school.... I WAS TRYING TO SURVIVE SINCE DAY 1 IN THE TRENCHES DEFENDING THIS GAME IT WAS ALWAYS GOOD AND DIDN'T NEED 10 YEARS TO AGE WELL. It's crazy how these are the same people who want another Kanto when Trubbish is Grimer (garbage waste) and Vanillite is Voltorb (based on literal items) then you could not catch any other pokemon from different regions in the main game. And the leak confirmed that the disgruntled hate from the west made the devs not release new pokemon in B2W2 and move them over to XY instead AND NOT GIVE A SINGLE GEN 5 MEGA EVOLUTION. So we were robbed because of genwunners who were fixated on the wrong things and ignored all the great content Unova brought us. It's strange how players keep complaining they want a different and fresh game, but want it to continue being super formulaic and binary like wtf do you want make up your mind

None of the switch titles really got me invested and I always end up replaying the older games but hopefully PLZA will break the curse and finally give us a nice game. Also why don't we have more spin-offs on the switch if there's so many of them floating around like the DS had a bunch??? STOP BEING COWARDS I WANT A POKEMON NINTENDOGS GAME OR THAT FIRE EMBLEM CROSSOVER WE WERE SUPPOSED TO GET. I JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN AGAIN ;w;

[alivegirlmari]

sorry i keep bothering u BUT i have another question😭 i was wondering if you’d seen this interview of melanie (https://youtu.be/xhHDMOEnuB4 the first minute and a half) and what you think of that because i’m pretty sure shauna does NOT care but to me jeff very much went from a sympathetic guy who loves his wife to a sinister little man😭 i get making bad decisions when you’re young but man😭

you are NOT bothering me omggg you could neverrr. me when i wake up to an anticurses ask and get to chew on it at work for the next two days: ❣️ 💕 💞 💓 💗 💖 💘 💝

i've seen a few people analyze that specific interview and tbh i don't think i have anything groundbreaking to add but i wanna just ramble about shauna anyways asdjnjsdk so! putting this under a readmore bc it'll probs be long-ish and incoherent <3

ok so. shauna's relationship to motherhood has always fascinated me. when i first watched yj it was all in one night, in a haze, during a not-good-mentally period in my life. so it took me an embarrassing amount of episodes to go from 'oh she hates callie bc callie's wilderness baby and thus a reminder of everything that entails, both jackie-related and trauma-related' to 'OH callie can't be wilderness baby, timeline wise, which adds an even more insane level to shauna returning to jeff post-crash'. bc the decision to date him let alone marry him has always been sooo interesting to me!! like yeah we all knew why but like, how did it happen? how long after the crash? did he call her up once she got out of hospital? did she go back to school? was it another drunk grief hookup thing again, but one that spiraled into more? did they discuss jackie at all? iirc, when he reveals he's read the diaries, he implies they never talked about the 19 months which is why he read them. but did they ever discuss jackie, separate to what happened in the woods? or was she the eternal elephant in the room? i mean, yes it's canon that shauna marries him out of guilt and shame and obligation, but the CALLIE of it all is the wildest part to me. bc she's pregnant with his baby, and then jackie dies and the baby dies, and then she goes back and has anotherrr baby with him, in spite of everything!!!!

so melanie p much saying 'she can't keep justifying her decision to not have kids with him, so they have one'. is like. well she's right!!! i can 1000% see jeff pushing to have kids and shauna, unaware that he knows about wilderness baby and not wanting to tell him, agreeing to it bc a) she'd rather die than talk about it honestly, b) the guilt of it all, and c) well that's what normal suburban heterosexual couples do isn't it?? get married and have kids!! and to me jeff has always been that guy, which he even admits in canon! he was always gonna be the high-school boyfriend to jackie, but that's his life role, too: he stays in his home-town, he owns a business in his home-town, his only friend is his teen bestie, etc. he's the suburban straight guy who doesn't properly wash his underwear, whose wife cooks every meal (that he still complains about), who thinks flavored lube is too kinky and weird and gay for him.

and it annoys me that the show doesn't even lean into the horror of that, let alone like...the genuinely terrribleeee things he does. like if you're not gonna frame it as devastating, tragic, claustrophobic, and miserable that shauna marries jackie's very Normie boyfriend and has another baby with him, that her whole life has become a jackie altar and not what she herself wants, then at least frame it as awful that he blackmailed her and her friends using their trauma??? HELLO???and i hate that the adam thing kinda like. made them ~even~, narratively, or at least made people forget about jeff.

and if you're NOT going to make it a heterosexual horror story, AT LEAST make him the wifeguy people insist he is online!! what REAL self-respecting wifeguy would turn down strawberry lube or panic when their wife grabs the gun from the guy holding them at gunpoint!!! and i mean, his reactions (to the gun thing at least) are valid and normal, ofc he'd freak out, majority of us would too. but this IS a tv show, he's not real, and you can't have him be the freaked out, 'you're out of control' husband and the 'my wife can do no wrong' husband ykwim. (me & rose talked about that angle specifically here)

but also YES it's legitimately evil for jeff to not tell shauna he knows about wilderness baby and for him to just then. keep bringing up having another one. the most generous reading i can give him is that he also, of course, feels guilty about jackie, and his desire for marriage and children with shauna is driven by that, but again: he knew he was only ever the high-school boyfriend, so. and what melanie said in that interview IS right but it's not being said/implied/explored in canon, and i worry that if it was then again, it wouldn't be shown as the horror it is, so i'm almost glad?? bc i'm not sure the general audience would see through that and view it as evil either.

anyways, jeff n shauna to me is like. does she love him? probably, in some way, on some level. i think she enjoys his company sometimes, i'm sure they have happy memories together etc. but he will always be a reminder of #everything. and so will callie! and i think that's just a more interesting dynamic to explore!!! (though tbh. loveee the goat stuff, but shauna just kinda. saying everything so explictly to lottie did feel like a telling not showing, exposition moment. as did the fact that it was a KID like sometimes this show is so subtle and other times it's incredibly not ajdksjask.)

um anyways it's 4am. i need to go to sleep. i am probably forgetting something bc i have So many thoughts about shauna + motherhood ESPECIALLY in the teen timeline which i didn't even touch lol, and how it connects to adult timeline but i do wanna give the writers temporary benefit of doubt just bc we've still got 2 eps left. so who knows what'll happen. me personally i'm hoping jeff dies and/or goes to jail and we explore the complex web of feelings that shauna and callie have towards each other, and they change their names back to shipman. i think it's rly funny and sad and tragic that callie doesn't care that her mom's a killer (well, she does), she's just so happy her mother's being honest with her. </33 also just love women who aren't naturally maternal and aren't good mothers but they're not villainized for it, and it's also not a one-dimensional portrayal either.

(final note that i LOVE is that in the original pilot script, shauna has another kid!!! callie has an older sister!!! soo curious whether she was meant to be a surviving wilderness baby or if they had another kid post-crash...jeff im in ur walls regardless)

[nxrthmizu]

happy birthday — tsukishima kei

pairing | tsukishima kei x reader

genre | fluff

w.c | 1.6k

↪ part two of this

second chance // an opportunity to try something again after failing one time

tsukishima kei wasn't expecting anyone. sure, it was his birthday, but he did have work the next day, and wasn't very keen on drinking himself senseless into the witching hour.

since yamaguchi, his mother, and akiteru had taken it upon themselves to inform half of japan of his birthdate, kei had just spent the past four hours repeating 'thank you' to people ranging from his junior high schoolmates and strangers he had never met. he was certain that 99% of the players involved with the japan volleyball league had shown up, much to the amazement of his museum colleagues.

the bell rings for the third time, and kei is suddenly hyperaware of how annoying the sound is. he had just sat down, for goodness's sake— was it too much to ask for one minute of rest?

with his socializing energy at an all-time-low, kei nearly tears the door off his hinges, greeting his unwelcome visitor with a fierce snarl. "what do you want—" the words clamp down on his throat, breaking his airflow for a whole five seconds as he stares, utterly floored. "... y/n?"

"...hey?" you look sheepish, holding a small, one-cake-slice-sized box in your hand. he's known you long enough to know that you did your makeup on the fly— the tremble of your eyeliner is a sure giveaway. "... uh... is this a bad time? cause i can come back later—"

"no!" he blurts, hands slamming onto the door frame. he hadn't caught a glimpse of you in six months, ever since that fateful night when you walked out through the same door you were now standing in front of. there wasn't a single night in those six, grueling months that he didn't think about you, or the warm feeling of having you contained within his arms. sure, there were nights when you two fought, heading to bed with your backs faced to each other— but when morning came, you would somehow be in his arms, and somehow kei just knew that things would blow over.

except maybe they didn't.

left with too much time to think, he analyzed every little argument the two of you ever had, critically examining every word he uttered. perhaps the break was needed— the two of you needed to take a step backwards, re-assessing what you two wanted for each other, what you two wanted together. what you said that night hadn't be wrong— there were just too many issues being swept under the rug, too many things you weren't communicating about, too many problems he elected to ignore, in hopes that they would just 'blow over'.

"i mean," he clears his throat, lifting his hand off the doorframe, groaning at the paint scratch he caused. "would... would you like to come in?"

mentally, he smacks his forehead. you don't need permission to enter! in his mind, kei still considers the apartment your home, too. even if you haven't stepped foot within its grounds for half a year.

"if that's okay?" you smile softly, holding up your cake box. "you've probably had some already, but i bought your favorite. if you're full, you could have it tomorrow morning, before work?"

"no, no, i'm not that full." kei instantly assures, even though he's already brushed his teeth. on normal circumstances, he would leave it for the next morning, but what was brushing his teeth one more time if he got to talk to you for the first time in over a hundred-eighty days?

you narrow your eyes at him playfully. "don't lie to me, tsukishima kei. i can smell your toothpaste. i'll leave it in the fridge."

a fond smirk dances over his lips as you brush past him into your apartment, leaving your shoes where you always do on the shoe rack. the sound of your sock-clad feet padding past the living room brings a truckload of tension that kei didn't know he had off his shoulders, and all of a sudden, the house feels a thousand times cozier, even if nothing materialistic has changed.

he watches you from the sofa as you bustle around the kitchen, and he knows by the number of beeps on the electric stove that you're boiling water for tea— green, probably. the ration of tea packets are restocked regularly, because when you moved in, you brought your tea addiction with you, too. kei's been lured into drinking it on a daily basis, right after dinner, as a way of calming himself down after a day of work and practice. typically, tea would be accompanied with you, snuggled up against his side as he complained about the kids he met at work that day (you both knew that he had a secret fondness for them, but shhh).

"i hope you don't mind. i made tea." you say, bringing the glass teapot you were adamant on buying a year ago. it was one of the best purchases kei ever made in the apartment, because he was reminded of the worth every single time the two of you did your regular tea routine.

"of course i don't mind." he replies instantly, picking up his mug (the green one with tiny dinos on the edge). "this is still your home, too. you don't have to ask to do anything."

he pretends not to see the flash of surprise across your features.

"right." you murmur, pressing your mug onto your lips, blowing gently on the surface.

the two of you sit in silence for a while, sipping on your tea as the clock ticks onto eleven o' clock. suppressing the urge to ask you to stay, kei taps the surface of his porcelain cup rhythmically, forgetting that you know all his tells, front to back.

"is there something on your mind?" you ask gently, setting your mug down. he grimaces.

"ah... it's nothing." kei brushes off, not wanting to come onto you too quickly. for all he knew, you were just here to deliver the cake, not to reignite whatever was left of the relation he let simmer for too long...

"... right." the tone of your voice spells i-know-you're-lying-to-me,-but-i'll-let-it-go-for-now.

the silence continues, like a set prolonged. it's starting to get on kei's nerves when you (thankfully) speak again.

"happy birthday."

"thank you." even though he's said those words a thousand times that night, it sounds a comparatively much less robotic than it had for the previous thousand times. perhaps it was thousand-first time's the charm. "i mean it. thank you for coming over."

you wave it off. "i couldn't have not come. tadashi sent me an invite, but my boss needed me to work late and i didn't manage to make it."

ah, so that was why his best friend routinely glanced at the entrance nervously throughout the night. that explained a lot.

"i don't mind." kei takes a sip of his green tea, enjoying the warmth that courses through his chest. it isn't warmer than the warmth you give him, though. "i like it like this. ... just the two of us, i mean."

you contemplate him for a moment. "i like it like this, too." you confess quietly, as if whispering a childhood secret to him behind the karasuno gym.

he couldn't bear it any longer. he's always been patient, yes, but he's seen the looks his mother and brother threw him through the night, because they both knew that the one person that really mattered wasn't there. he was pretty sure his mother was just about to introduce him to some random girl before he excused himself for the night.

"will you stay?" he blurts, feeling very un-tsukishima-kei-like. it isn't like him at all, to be brash, and bold, but how can he? for the past four hours, he's talked to countless people— heck, half of them were volleyball celebrities— but not the one he wanted to talk to.

"do you want me to?" you ask softly, shyly, and kei knows that you're thinking if he wants you back— which is stupid, honestly. he knows that you're always thinking that you're lucky to have him, when it should be the other way around. kei doesn't think there's anyone else willing to put up with his dry humor, his hectic schedule, and his dinosaur memorabilia. if anything, he should be the one thanking the gods for letting him have you.

"don't be stupid." he snaps, cringing internally at how his tone came off. "of course i want you to stay, you're the best thing that happened to me. i won't force you, but—"

"i left some clothes here, right?" you cut him off with a hum, and when kei looks into your eyes, he just knows.

there's still a long, long, long way for the two of you to go. there's still plenty of things he needs to learn. there's a pile of issues in the store room that needed to be tended to.

for every million arguments there are a billion conversations where you two need to sit down and work out the knots. for every insecurity, for every misunderstanding, for every conflict, there is a needed effort to clean up the mess properly instead of just sweeping it under the floorboards. but for every tangle there lies between the two of you, there is a universe of room to grow, and change.

kei knows he's willing to make an effort, for you. kei knows that he's willing to do anything to make sure you don't walk out that door without looking back again. kei knows he's willing to do every single thing he can do (and can't) to make it work.

he knows.

he looks into your eyes, and he smiles.

everything is going to be alright.

haikyuu!! taglist: @ryuiki @hikari-writes @whootwhoot @folkloeren @definitely-yours @rirk-ke @cemeiia @animegirlweeb @mitzwinchester @fandomsgotmefucked

[sanzusbestie]

Well, I don't know if you will accept this request, but... Could I have a scenario where Hanma's girlfriend talks about constant sexual abuse at home and one day he finds out? Like for example, things get worse for his little girlfriend and she shows up with a bruise on her neck that wasn't there before and then he confronts her about it. Her bruises showing all over her body and thighs, you decide the end if you decide to do that. If not, just disregard it.

♡ Resilience ♡

Pairing : Shuji Hanma x Fem!reader

Warnings : Violence, sexual abuse, mentions of alcohol,suicidal thoughts, cursing, angst, kinda happy ending ?

A/n : I'm not gonna lie, writing this was kinda hard, emotionally. I sincerely hope that anyone that lives in this situation can get some help. Thank you for requesting, I really hope you'll like it ! Have a nice day ♡

  Watch your mouth. Watch your eyes.

  Watch your stance.

  Watch your emotions. Watch your heartbeat.

  Watch your hair. Watch your dress.

  Be cute, be trendy.

  Be a nice little girl for daddy.

  Some people had an easier life. Some had a worse.

  You weren't one to complain. You had everything a human needed : a roof over your head, food, water, sanitary conditions and an education.

  You had no right to complain. Not when some people had nothing.

  But it hurt.

  If your friends, strangers, noticed something about you, God forbid, they never brought it up.

  No one around, you sighed and opened the door.

  "I'm home."

  No answer.

  You had a few hours for yourself, alone. In the tiny hallway, you risked a quick glance at the bedroom facing yours. Not seeing anyone there, you closed the door, relieved.

  You never understood love.

  Why do we run into thousands of people and fall in love with only one of them ?

  Your eyes landed on small framed picture. Your father. Your mother. You.

  Nothing was more deceptive than a photo : we would think we’d set a happy moment for eternity while we’d only create a nostalgia from false memories.

  "Can't you fucking smile properly ?"

"Yes, mom, I can. Look ! Aren't I pretty this way ?"

"Yes ! But be careful, don't be more beautiful than mommy !"

  You didn't understand, back then. You were just a little girl. Who would've thought it was some kind of a twisted competition ?

  Was love always supposed to be hurtful ?

  "Ah... You look so much like her," he said, a hand slowly making its way to your neck.

  Taking a deep breath, you closed your eyes and faced away. You couldn't bear to look at him.

  You've never met someone this... inhumane.

  You never understood love.

  Why did he chose you. He was your one in thousands of people you ran into. But were you his ?

  He, who was so lively. He, who got bored so easily.

  Why did he chose to stay with you ?

  You never understood yourself.

  How could you have fallen in love, when you never understood it ?

  You looked up at him, eating his hamburger with a boyish grin.

  What a contrast with his tattoos. Could someone, smiling this way and having "sin" and "punishment" forever adorning his skin, be trusted ? You didn't know.

  What you knew was that he was violent, sometimes. Not with you.

  Never with you.

  However, by the bruises and the scratches on his knuckles, you knew he was no angel.

  Would these knuckles hit you one day ? Would this boyish grin spit crude words to you one day ?

  Many questions, no answers. You probably would never get one.

  Love would torment and cause suffering; love would only be a deceiving sun, a drug that would prevent us from seeing reality. We always believed that we loved someone for what they are but,

  Did he know what you were ?

  Would he stay if he knew ?

  "Do you not like it ?" he asked.

  "Huh ?"

  "The food," he added, "Do you not like it ? You haven't touched your plate."

  Was he suspicious ?

  Watch your mouth. Watch your stance.

  "Oh, I do like it ! But it was too hot so I was waiting for it to cool down."

  "It's probably frozen now. Well, it won't hurt you. You must be hot already with the collar of your shirt buttoned up. Why do you wear it like that ? Aren't you suffocating this way ?"

  Yes.

  Yes.

  Yes.

  Be cute, be trendy.

  "No, it's fashion."

  "It's fucking summer."

  Maybe there were reasons, but most of the time there weren't. You got hit for a reason you forgot.

  Oh yes. You had the bad idea to play house with your classmates of last year of kindergarten. You pecked one of your boy friends on the mouth. Your mother found about that a few days after from one of her friends as she was dropping you off at school. You didn't know why, but she immediately took you back home. You thought you were off the hook because she hadn't jumped on you yet.

  When you were back home, she asked you to take off your pants. While you did as you were told, you heard the sound of the microwave. You didn't know what she was up to. She came back to you, hot pepper in hand that she had just heated up.

  Despite your big imagination, nothing could've prepared you for what she was about to do to you : rub it against your genital area.

  The burning sensation overwhelmed you. You screamed and cried. And, as if it wasn't enough, you got a few hits before being dragged to your room.

  There you were. Alone, trying to ease the pain.

  Through the door, you heard her leaving the flat. A relief for you. She wasn't going to come back with an other pepper.

  When she came back that night, you heard her entering your room and you squeezed your eyes shut, fearing she'd find out you were still awake. Maybe she realized that her blows were unjustified because she said :

  "I would've apologized if you were a boy."

  She always dreamed of having a son. Unfortunately, she had you.

  You were so young but so, so hurt. A dark idea crossed your mind : suicide. When you were sure both your parents were sound asleep, you got a plastic bag and out your head into it, closing it around your neck. You knew that at one point you would lack oxygen and you would die. So you waited, lying on your bed with your favourite doll. You took it off very quickly tho, scared and not able to go through it.

  "How did you sleep, princess ?"

  Watch your mouth.

  "I slept well," you lied while taking a sit behind him on his motorcycle.

  The motion of your leg lifted your school skirt a little bit.

  So little that you didn't even notice.

  But he did.

  "How did you got this bruise ?"

  "What are you talking about ?"

  "Your thigh."

  "Oh this. I bumped into my desk at school yesterday. Now come on, were going to be late."

  Your father was a man that succeeded in his life. A company that perfectly worked. He was rich.

  He was very talkative, constantly repeating the same things. He was shamelessly childish. Sometimes, he would make suspicious noises in the stores, saying loud and clear "did you just fart ?". He knew how to embarrass anyone.

  Everything got destroyed somehow, and he couldn't handle all the debts. Shortly after, your mother left both of you.

  He became an unhappy man. He got some drinking issues, dipping into it almost every day.

  He started to cry, telling you that one day he would shoot himself. You tried to comfort him as much as you could, in your nine year old mind.

  Now, you weren't his daughter anymore. You were a replacement of your mother.

  You were pretending to be asleep, maybe he wouldn't do anything this night. Hours started to get longer and he still hadn't came back home.

  You got up and opened your window, hoping for some fresh air. Your imagination sometimes put you in danger, as if you were totally disconnected from reality. You watch the local residents passing, the trees dancing, some birds flying... You were convinced that, if you jumped, you could fly too. And when you'd land, you wouldn't hurt yourself. You dreamed of freedom, escape, peace. A little voice in your head asked you :

  "Are you going to jump ? You're not ? Come on, do it, you'll be okay."

  At this moment, a friend of your father saw you bent by the window. He asked you what you were doing and you explained to him that you were home, alone in your room. You added,

  "Do I jump ?"

  He started to panic, yelling "No !".

  You listened to him.

  You went back to your bed, facing away from the door. Your father came back shortly after and opened your door. He must've received a call from his friend, which must've freaked him out.

  He hasn't touched you that night.

  "Summer break ! Finally !" your boyfriend yelled.

  You laughed. "Calm down Shu."

  "I can't ! Don't you understand ? It's summer break ! Let's go to the beach !"

  "Ew, wet sand !"

  He took your hands in his and brought his forehead to yours.

  "Let's spend the best holiday of our lives. And then, next year, we'll- what's on your neck ?"

  "There's nothing on my neck Shu. So, what were you saying."

  "Don't play dumb with my right now. What's on your neck ?"

  "Fine, you're so stubborn" you sighed, "I burned my sel-"

  "You burned yourself with your straightening iron ? Bullshit. Tell me the truth, now."

  You looked at each other for an eternity before he asked :

  "Was it your dad ?"

  "What ? No, it wasn't ! Now stop with that !"

  "It was him, wasn't it ? Stop lying ! I'm going to kill him."

  You grabbed his arm, stopping him.

  "You're not going to do anything. Stop now."

  "So it was him ?"

  You could only nod.

  "That's it, he's dead."

  "No, stop ! You're going to get yourself into troubles !"

  "And what do you expect me to do, huh ?!" he screamed, "Just sit back quietly while he hurts you ?"

  "Hey, look," you whispered, your hands on his cheeks, "We're seventeen. Once I'm eighteen and done with high school, I'll be able to work, gain my own money and have my own place ! Do don't worry, everything goes according to plan !" you exclaimed smiling.

  "What the hell are you talking about ?" He couldn't believe you. How could you say that with a smile ? "I'm not letting you going back there. If you don't want me to end him, at least come live with me, you know I live alone."

  "Don't be ridiculous, Shu," you chuckled, "You know we won't be financially able."

  "We will. I promise you, we will. I love you and I'd do anything for you. You know that."

  What were promises ? A bunch of words you could trust ? No. Just a bunch of words.

  You never understood love.

  Maybe it just didn't exist.

  "So you're telling me that you're willing to destroy everything you have for something that doesn't exist ?" you asked.

  "What does not exist ?"

  "Love."

  "You think love doesn't exist ?" Why were you with him then, we wondered.

  "Maybe it does. But you, you seemed to believe this stupid idea of real, big love. As if there was some kind of entanglement between two people predestined to meet..."

  "Is it really stupid to think there might be someone out there who could make you happy, someone you'd like to grow old with ?"

  You didn't know what to answer.

  Was he right ? Could he be trusted ?

  Could you be loved ?

  Could you love in return ?

  Could you, someday, enjoy life ?

  There are moments in life where a door would open and your life would skid in the light. Rare instants where something would unlock in you. You'd float weightless, answers replacing questions. Fear would give way to love. Those moments were furtive, only you could make them last.

  You never felt good in presence of a man. And then, Hanma came into your life. You never knew you could experience these kinds of feelings for someone. You never knew that passion with compatible with admiration, humour and affection.

  Of course, you could not erase memories with a sweep. They'd stay in you, lurking in the shadow, watching for the moment you'd let your guard down to emerge with tenfold force.

  But maybe with him by your side, it would be bearable.

  You never understood love, but you didn't mind learning about it.

♡

[lepusrufus]

I can't stop thinking about the SAR au asdfghjkl; you really managed to get me 197% invested with that drabble, holy shit!!! The tension? The way it starts out normal, but the little oddities pile up until you're left questioning just about everything? Mwah! 11/10 💕💕💕

The more I think about it, the more curious I get! And it's like. stairs?? but they're spooky. Ya managed to make stairs spooky (I feel like that's impressive)!

So fucking good, my dude. Scent trail suddenly stopping just shy of a freaky set of stairs that don't go anywhere? Something about them drawing Cait closer? Vi saying /never/ to go up them? And then the kid is found somewhere up high, with no way down, and a grown ass adult needs climbing gear to get to them?? magic freaky stairs. Love it.

As I mentioned before, this whole AU is based on a fairly popular series of short horror stories and an excuse for me to mess around with this specific kind of horror. So if you want more of this I definitely recc checking them out on reddit or youtube if you're the listening type like me)

Now with that being said... well congrats now there's a part two to Annie's rescue. Complete with more weirdness and lesbians lesbianing so enjoy :V

////

By the time they reached their other team members, Jinx was already halfway up the cliff. Gangly limbs moving with far more grace than they did in any other situation, grabbing onto the rock and fixing the rope attached to her harness in swift practiced movements.

She only spared a glance downward when the two arrived, giving her sister a mock salute. She was too far up to be heard anyways. Ekko regarded them similarly, with a nod from where he was standing with Benzo, making sure things went smoothly. He noticed the frown ever present on Caitlyn's face, never having really left, and remembered the urgency she had talked over the radio with.

"Found anything out there?" he asked, eyeing both women one after the other.

"No."

It was Vi the one to speak up, getting that single word out with finality in her tone while not taking her eyes off her sister. Ekko didn't miss the way Caitlyn’s eyes snapped to her, frown deepening as she was about to say something but thought better of it. She shook her head instead and busied her hands with fixing the already well fitted harness on her dog.

Ekko didn't press further either.

A few dozen meters above, Jinx finally hauled her body over the last remaining ledge that separated her from the small girl. "Hey there," she said, a smile that she hoped was reassuring on her face while she focused on finding a sturdy spot to attach the rope. She found the perfect tight crevice for it, testing it with a few forceful tugs and nodding her contentment when it wouldn't budge.

When she took in the girl -Annie, she remembered- she was glad to see she didn't seem particularly frightened, if not a bit shaken. Most children in that situation would be small trembling messes and always rather difficult to rescue. Scratch that, adults were just as difficult if not worse more often than not, but at least she could give them a few choice words to make them snap out of it without adding to some long lasting trauma.

She would inquire later on why exactly she wasn't scared, but if it made her job easier in the moment then she wasn't complaining.

Jinx crouched down in front of Annie, taking out the extra harness she brought with her.

"Let's put this on so I can get you back to your parents, what do you say?"

Annie looked between Jinx’s bright blue eyes and the harness in her hands with some apprehension. It was a few long seconds of Jinx forcing an encouraging smile before the little girl nodded tentatively. With a relieved sigh, the equipment was quickly fixed and properly tightened to the size of a small child, finishing up with attaching it to Jinx's own harness.

"Alrighty, you just hold on tight. It'll be like a little roller-coaster. Do you like roller-coasters?"

Annie held onto her thin frame as if her life depended on it -it didn't really, they were tied together after all- and shook her head. Jinx’s smile faltered before turning into a grimace as she sucked air through her teeth, expression unseen by the little girl who opted to squeeze her eyes shut.

Well then.

It took them a few good minutes to get down. Far longer than necessary given Jinx’s record of being able to scale down a rope at lightning speeds, to her sister's dismay. But she supposed propelling towards the ground with a child who just spent hours on a cliff for all she knew would be a bad idea. So she took her time. Slowly pushed off the wall on sturdy legs and made sure they were both steady at any given time.

The moment their feet touched the grass at the base of the cliff, Annie all but jumped away. Her plan got cut short by the harness still keeping her attached to Jinx, who couldn't help a snort as she felt the sudden yank. But the moment she was free, her colleagues were there to help.

Vi, ever the kid whisperer, as Jinx dubbed her, kneeled down in front of Annie with a kind smile that did nothing to cover the relief she felt. She asked how she was feeling, if she was injured or hurting anywhere, and Annie nodded or shook her head shyly at most of her questions.

"Are you cold? Your mom gave us your vest," she said while giving Caitlyn’s leg a few quick pats.

Her partner was still deep in thought, long fingers fidgeting with the patch on her jacket that read Zaun National Park. So much so that by the fifth pat she jumped slightly, having forgotten that she was even holding the red garment in her hand and clumsily giving it to Vi when her mind finally caught up.

"There we go," Vi said, holding the vest up so Annie could push her arms through it. "Let's get you back to your parents."

Vi scooped up the girl effortlessly, letting her rest her head on one strong shoulder as she and Caitlyn started the trek back to the main station. The rest stayed behind to gather up all the equipment and said they would catch up soon, not wanting to keep the kid and her parents away from each other longer than necessary.

They were merely twenty minutes into the hike when the sky started to darken properly. It was already late when they had found Annie, and there was no doubt that the majority of the journey back would be made in the dark. Vi didn’t mind, having been part of more rescue operations that stretched well into the night than she cared to count, so the dark woods didn't make her feel as uneasy as they once did. And Caitlyn didn’t seem to be particularly bothered by it either, simply pulling out her flashlight and illuminating the path ahead.

Annie however was clutching harder to Vi's uniform, small fists pulling on the fabric in a gesture that was probably meant to be subtle but was noticed nonetheless. Vi put one hand on her back, hoping it would bring some comfort.

"Are you scared?" she asked softly.

"No."

Vi hummed, eyes fixated up ahead. She saw Caitlyn turn and give her a quizzical look at the sudden break of silence.

"Are you sure?"

Annie hesitated for a few seconds, the contemplation obvious as she thought about an answer. "I don't like the dark," she finally settled on, voice quieter than before.

"There’s nothing to be scared of out here," Vi said.

It was a lie and she knew it. Even Caitlyn, who had been working there for not even a month seemed well aware of that when she turned again, one eyebrow quirked up in skepticism. Vi gave her a look, eyes widening ever so slightly, that told her to not say a word to the girl. Annie, whose head was still resting against Vi's shoulder, was none the wiser to their silent exchange.

Because it was half a lie. There were always things that could harm you out in the wilderness. But Vi had learned long ago that the key to getting out unscathed was to have a healthy amount of respect for the nature that surrounded her. Of course there were the… freak accidents, but nobody really spoke about those.

"But you can't see anything. What if the bear comes back?"

Annie's voice was quiet and muffled against Vi's uniform, but it was more than enough to cause the two officers to exchange a worried look.

"Bear?" Caitlyn asked, despite a small frown from Vi that tried to communicate that maybe now wasn't the best time.

Her reply came in the form of a quiet affirmative hum. "He took me to his home and said he would bring me more friends so I wouldn't be lonely," Annie explained in a small voice.

That sentence alone was enough to send a shiver down Vi’s back, who clenched her jaw and kept her focus fixated on the path ahead. Not the time. Now was not the time damn it. Not when they were only halfway through the woods and the only thing that kept them from plunging into pitch black darkness were flashlights whose batteries she may or may not have forgotten to check. A thing that Caitlyn seemed less inclined than her to ignore.

"He what?" she whispered with some alarm, her pace faltering as she whipped her head to the side at Vi and the girl in her arms.

It even startled Sniper a bit, the sudden movement tugging on his leash and causing him to raise his muzzle towards his owner inquisitively. Caitlyn paid it no mind, eyes boring onto the side of Vi's head and daring her to meet her gaze. She didn’t.

"Mhm," Annie unknowingly interrupted their little one sided staredown. "But I got scared and it made him mad. So he just left me on that cliff."

Caitlyn didn’t say anything after that. She simply looked down at Annie's feet and took in the way her shoes looked so clean, soles a little dusty but nowhere near dirty enough to indicate a walk up the mountain. Her clothes were in a similar condition too, in too good of a shape for someone who presumably made her way through dense thorny thickets and up a sheer cliffside.

Despite the silence that enveloped them afterwards, the tension was clear as day. Annie had dozed off at one point probably due to sheer exhaustion while Caitlyn led the way, her flashlight kept on the path ahead. She threw a few glances towards Vi, eyes narrowing for a split second with questions sitting on the tip of her tongue. Then she saw the practiced neutrality on her partner's expression, practiced but not enough to completely conceal the stress that lay underneath, and dropped it.

It was another half hour of hiking without pause, neither of them wanted to stop for one reason or another, until they finally reached the familiar gravel path to the station. Annie's parents were sitting on one of the wooden benches outside, her mother shooting to her feet and sprinting to them the moment they came into view. She was quickly followed by her father and sister.

There were tears, there were words of gratiture exchanged that Vi graciously replied to with a kind smile and a simple happy to get her back safe. All the while Caitlyn hung back a few paces, offering a kind smile at the gratitudes but otherwise pretending to keep herself busy with checking Sniper over for any non existing injuries or debris stuck in his fur.

It took a while for the parents to compose themselves, with Annie held tightly in their arms. By the time they were ready to complete some paperwork for a report and leave, their colleagues had finally caught up too. Jinx was loudly chatting with Ekko about whatever project they were planning to work on next, while Benzo was right behind them, holding up his flashlight yet still not managing to prevent the two from stumbling when they got too engrossed in their conversation. Vi greeted them at the base of the low porch of the station, teasingly congratulating her sister on her job, yet the fondness in her voice was unmistakable. It gained her a whack with one long braid and a playful shoulder shove as the group walked past them and made their way inside.

"You coming?" Vi asked, once they were the only two people still left outside. "We're gonna make some cheap hot chocolate. Or tea for you," she tried for something casual and failed.

Caitlyn was still crouched down next to her dog, a hand absentmindedly playing with one of the buckles from his harness. When she looked up at her partner, her eyes held the same intensity from before, framed by a frown that was yet to let her beautiful features relax.

"Vi."

There was an edge of something in her voice. If she looked hard enough Vi could recognize it as distrust and it left a bitter taste in her mouth.

"Yeah?"

"If you don’t tell me exactly what the hell is going on here I'm putting in my one week notice tomorrow and leaving."

It was an empty threat and they both knew it to an extent. Not only because Caitlyn wouldn't simply pack her stuff and leave a position that finally allowed her to help people in a more substantial way, but also because there were countless other K9 teams out there that could replace her in no time. But Caitlyn held out some hope that Vi harbored some affection for her, enough to not want her gone at least.

Vi sighed deeply, her shoulders dropping in defeat as she ran a hand though messy pink hair.

"Yeah. Yeah okay that sounds fair," she said, though it didn't placate Caitlyn much. Her frown still in place, she kept looking at her partner expectantly. "Uh- we both have tomorrow off right? Why don't we um, meet for coffee and I'll give you the proper run-down?"

Vi tried for a warm smile, but it came out shy when she noticed the way Caitlyn’s expression turned from harsh to surprise, complete with a blush dusting her pale cheeks. Vi tried to convince herself that she was just seeing things in the almost absent light that came from the porch, but it didn't stop some heat from raising to her own face.

Well, this wasn’t exactly how Vi would've liked to ask her out, but desperate times…

Caitlyn cleared her throat, averting her eyes for a moment and Vi was afraid she had horribly overstepped some boundary. "Yes. That would be nice," Caitlyn said then, and soothed some of Vi’s fears a little.

This time, the charming smile came more easily as she stuck out a hand for her partner to take. She pulled her up from the dusty battered ground and gestured towards the porch as if to say after you. "I'll pick you up at nine," she said as Caitlyn took the first step on the stairs.

Caitlyn looked back down at her. "You don't know where I live, Vi," she deadpanned, but the amusement in her eyes was unmistakable.

"Damn I can't even be a gentlewoman anymore," Vi muttered and the giggle she got in response made her think that maybe this was still salvageable.

[racheloveyunho]

Till Death do us part - 2

Y/N grew up in a wealthy family, she always was seen as a beautiful and smart kid and was most likely to take her father’s place as the CEO of one of the most important companies in South Korea. However, after the death of her mother, Y/N’s family slowly started to break apart. Her father was always working to forget his uncalled pain while his kids were left alone at home.

She was 17 years old when her life took a sudden turn when she met him in a dark alley. He was a bloody mess, bruises everywhere but behind blood and dirt, she could see his beautiful features and his addictive gaze. Maybe she should have walked away, maybe she shouldn’t have helped him, but the moment his gaze locked with hers, she was already his.

Choi San was his name.

Genre: Mafia AU, smut, angst, fluff, stranger to lovers

Words: 2237

TW series: Y/N is described as an OC. Please be aware that this story will contain a lot of triggering content such as smut, blood, death, murder, drug, kidnapping, etc. Do not read if you are under a legal age!

TW chapter: Body shaming, reader being forced into a marriage, character got slapped, swearing, threats.

I was finally back home. Fortunately for me, my dad hadn’t noticed me since he was already sleeping on the couch.

I quickly went upstairs to my room and collapsed on my bed, my mind still processing what had happened earlier. It was scary to say the least but fascinating at the same time. I was still confused even after showering. This San had a deep effect on me, not only mentally but physically too.

“Choi San…” I muttered before closing my eyes and drifting into a deep sleep.

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Chapter 2

2 years after.

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Days and months went by so fast, I didn't even see them go by.

It has already been two years since my first meeting with San and since then, I didn't met him again. However, he was still on my mind, from the moment I woke up tired in the morning until the moment my head was hitting the pillow at night.

I just couldn't stop myself from thinking about him, his voice, his gaze, his touch, and the shivers he gave me when his mouth had come close to my ear.

"Hey sis’, what is going on? You had been absent-minded for a while and I still don't know why" Jin said with a hint of worry in his voice before he looked around, checking the surroundings to make sure we were alone "Is it because of dad?" he asked.

For the first time since our mother passed away, dad was at home for a whole month without any explanation. He was now working from home and even though It was something I dreamed of a few years ago, it was now so stuffy, I couldn’t breathe properly in my own house. Every single time I went outside of the comfort of my room, I silently prayed not to meet him, hoping that our house was big enough to let me avoid him.

"I'm fine but I'll be better if he wasn't around" I shrugged while looking at my plate "I'm not hungry today" I nonchalantly played with my food.

"Please force yourself and eat a little, you loosed too much weight recently" he furrowed his eyebrows with true concern in his soft brown eyes.

"I'm fine Jin, really! No need to worry for me" I stood up but felt a hand on my shoulder, stopping me in my track.

I turned around and saw my dad with his usual stern expression "Sit down." he calmly ordered.

I sat down without a word, I knew I was about to be lectured one more time.

"Why are you not eating?" my dad asked, voice sounding more as a threat than a question.

"Not hungry" I simply answered.

A long silence settled in the dining room, Jin and I were looking down, trying to avoid any eye contact with the man we referred to as our dad. I laughed internally at the situation, wondering if the kids in other families were afraid of their parents too.

"You don't have to eat if you don't want to, men love slim girls so it'll be good for you to start a diet." He stated, unbothered by the awkward silence.

I was annoyed by his remark 'how dare he' I thought 'Is he thinking my body is his?'

"I'll be dumb if I'd choose a man who loves me just for my body, I will not change anything for anyone" I retorted, Jin nodding in approval, visibly proud of me. But, my father didn’t seem pleased at all by my answer and my rebellious behavior.

"Well, I wasn't talking about any random man, but about your fiancé. He likes slim girls." my dad crossed his arms.

I shot a glance back at my father with wide eyes, he was smirking over my shocked expression, feeling visibly satisfied by the way he made me go silent.

"My fiancé? What are you talking about? I never had a boyfriend in my whole life, how could I have a fiancé?" I shouted, standing up from my chair which quickly and loudly fell on the ground.

"I chose a good boy for you, he is the son of a rich politician who will be useful to me and the future of my company. In two months, when you'll turn 20, you will marry him" he said, not sparing a glance at me as he busily taped on the screen of his new expensive phone.

My mouth was now wide open, and so was my brother's.

Jin stood up angrily, it was the first time I ever saw him defy our father's authority. His brown eyes who always seemed so soft to me were now darker than ever. The anger in his body was showing with his tensed muscles and the vein in his forehead that was angrily popping up. His jaw was so tight, I swore he could have been able to break his own teeth.

"What to do you mean she will marry him? Are you not concerned about your daughter's happiness? Can't you stop thinking about your work and think more about your family instead, for at least once in your life? That's why mom died! You-..." Jin got slapped by my father before he could even finish his sentence. Our father’s face was red and rage was visible through his eyes.

I gasped and kneeled myself to my brother's side, the impact was so hard that he was now laying on the ground, his right hand hiding his red cheek. Jin shot a death stare up at my father who was still standing in front of us.

"I heard that you want to integrate the Seoul national university, Y/N. You will need money for that, right? If you marry this man, I'll give you all the money you want. If not, you can already say goodbye to this dream of yours." he told me with a harsh voice "Think well cause your birthday is coming up" he added before exiting the room.

I collapsed on the floor, tears were stinging my eyes and blurring my vision. Jin hugged me tightly and patted my back, whispering sweet nothings to my ear to comfort me the best he could.

I hid my head on his neck and cried silently, I hated this, hated this situation, hated this life. I was like a bird trapped in a silver cage.

I ate nothing for the rest of the day after my dad had announced my upcoming wedding.

I still couldn't believe it. I didn't want to believe it. How come a father could do this to his only daughter? Wasn't he supposed to love and cherish me?

It was Saturday and after a lazy morning, I finally stood up to do my daily routine. I put the prettiest dress I had on my dressing and put natural makeup on. I tried my best to cover up my dark circles and hide the exhaustion in my face caused by a long night of crying.

Today, my best friend Hana and I, planned to hang out together for a shopping day. It was the best way for me to think about something else than my current situation.

I took a look at my phone and saw her message "Hey honey, I'm waiting in front of your house~" I read before smiling and joining her outside the house, in front of the big gateway.

"Wow, you are stunning! Why is that? You're going to meet this San again?" She smiled widely.

Hana is the first friend I ever made in my life, I first met her when I was just 6 years old and she always stayed by my side even when I went through hard times. Her cheerful personality and her warm smile made her easy to get along with, she was the best at socializing, she was literally a burst of energy by herself and never failed to make me crack up a smile even when I wasn’t in a good mood. She made everyone feel attracted to her, she wasn’t only nice and outgoing but beautiful and funny as well. Her short and messy hair were completing her chubby cheeks and her brown eyes. Her tall frame and perfect curves made everyone drool over her, men and women.

She knew everything about my life. When something happened to me, she was the first one I talked to.

"I already told you! I know nothing about him, I don't even have his phone number, how could I meet him?" I pouted before laughing playfully.

We took the first bus we saw and headed downtown.

"It's a shame he isn't on any social media" she whined loudly "Dude, don't get me started" I answered, almost complaining.

During the bus ride, I talked once again about how I felt about San and the gorgeous charisma he had. Hana listened to me as if it was the first time I talked about this whilst I already told her a hundred times before.

Within ten minutes, we had reached our destination.

"Y/N! Look at this! I'm sure this top will fit you perfectly" I heard Hana yelling from the other side of the shop.

Everyone looked at us, some customers were judging us silently while others smiled, probably finding amusement in my friend’s behavior.  I apologized to the other customers for the noise and quickly went to my friend's side, slightly embarrassed even though I was used to it. Hana didn't know the word "silent".

After 3 hours of shopping, I went outside to eat ice cream with Hana. We moved to a quiet spot with no one around. The weather was nice, it was a sunny day and I let myself relax under the comfortable heat.  I always liked rainy days better but I liked to feel the sun against my skin from time to time.

"I'm sorry to say this Y/N, but your father is truly an asshole" Hana swore between her teeth after I told her what happened at home the previous day.

"I don't know what I'm going to do about this. Is it better to agree and then divorce this guy? But my dad is well-known, he always will find a way to keep me under his grip, no matter what I do. I feel completely useless and trapped, I can’t find a good way to escape from this" I spoke in a low tone, sadness filling my voice the more I talked.

I sighed, concerned by the situation I was into. Hana gently rubbed my back to give me some comfort while my head was on her shoulder. We stayed silent for a few minutes, both of us didn’t know what to say because we both knew that there was no way I could escape my fate.

"Excuse me, are you Kim Y/N?"

I turned around to see who had called my name. In front of me stood was a well-dressed man, a bit older than me with a confident look. He wasn't especially handsome, but he wasn't unpleasant to look at. He had this classic Korean vibe one could find everywhere here in Korea.

"Yes? Who are you?" I politely asked.

He took my hand in his own, making me stand up from the bench I was sitting in. Soon after, he put a slight kiss on the back of my hand.

"What the hell?" I shouted and took my hand off his.

It wasn't in our culture to do something like this so I first assumed he had grown up abroad but honestly, from what I knew, even in the USA or Europa no one kissed a perfect stranger met in the street less than ten seconds ago.

"Who the heck are you?" Hana jumped between the man and me.

"I'm Hwang Jinyoung, her future husband" he simply stated, a smirk on his face.

"I never agreed on that." I frowned my eyebrows at his statement.

"What do you mean you never agreed? Your father told us that you were glad to be my future wife" The man seemed truly surprised or at least, he was pretending well to be.

"He lied!" I yelled out, the anger taking over me while I clenched my fists, nails finding their way onto y skin.

I was angry that my father had one more time, talked for me without my consent. My body was shaking from anger while the man laughed at my reaction.

"Move, you're in my way" He suddenly stopped laughing and violently pushed Hana to the ground.

My eyes opened wide from the shock. I was about to check on Hana to be sure she wasn't hurt but Jinyoung grabbed my wrist and pulled me in his chest.

"Why are you so angry? I will take good care of you!" he chuckled.

"Let me go!" I screamed against him, feeling the tears tingling my eyes.

I suddenly felt a strong arm around my waist which encircled me from behind.

"Holy shit." Hana gasped when she saw the handsome man who was protectively hugging me.

I had no need to look back, I already knew who it was. This touch and this warmness were simply unforgettable.

"If you don't let her go in the next five seconds, I'll blow your hands off." the voice behind me growled against Jinyoung.

The beating of my heart quickened. For the past two years I had dreamed about him every night and now, I was finally able to see him again.

"San!" I shouted happily, finally looking to the handsome boy. He smiled back atme but his expression became cold again as he stared at Jinyoung. My so-called husband finally let my wrist go and hardly swallowed his spit.

"Y-you! What are you doing here?" he asked with a shaking voice. I had no doubt about the fact that he knew who San was and that he probably knew him better than I did.

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Edit: Guys, I'm so surprised, I didn't think I would get so many likes for this series, I just uploaded it two days ago after all lol but I'm glad! The next chapter is already done but I'll wait a bit before uploading it, maybe next week? Anyways, thank you again!

Tag list:

@hijirikaww @pinkchampagne2

[haikyuuuuuhypeeeee]

Ch. Fifteen

⚠WARNING: Mention of previous character's death

• ────── ✾ ────── •

You set your phone down and look at Oikawa’s prone body lying next to you.

Once you returned to your apartment Oikawa was 99% asleep - you’re really not sure how he was able to put one foot in front of the other, but he did. You were going to deposit him into your bed but Oikawa was clinging to you like an octopus. So instead you let gravity do the work and you both had fallen backwards onto your comforter and pillows.

Oikawa didn’t even bother moving to get underneath the blankets before he properly fell asleep, mouth open and everything. He remained clutched to your arms, and you were helpless to try and escape from under him.

Ever since they were children, Oikawa always had to cling to someone and he’d be especially clingy when he was upset (which given today wasn’t surprising that you couldn’t pry yourself from his grip.) Since you, Oikawa and Hajime all lived in the same neighborhood since elementary, you had frequent sleepovers at each other’s homes. And sure enough, every time Oikawa would subconsciously choose you or Hajime to cling to while sleeping.

Hajime absolutely hated it but you didn’t mind.

Watching your friend sleep you can't help but give a sad little smile. He looks peaceful and so young in sleep. You know he’s the furthest from innocent right now, and he has a lot of work ahead of him to fully earn your trust back. But you wish that he wasn’t tortured with the troubles that plague you all.

A knock at the door makes you sit up. Oikawa’s face pinches at the motion, and you speak to him. “Mattsun and Makki are here, but you can sleep if you want.”

His reply is a sleepy grumble but he too sits up. You know that despite him only getting a few hours of sleep he won’t want to be left alone in your room. Together, with Oikawa leaning on you, you walk to the door and let in your friends. Mattsun raises his eyebrows at the sight of a clingy and exhausted Oikawa hanging off your frame but you just shrug. Makki seems to take pity on you as he drags Oikawa off and over to the couch, handing his coat off to Mattsun to hang up.

“Thanks for coming over,” you tell Mattsun. “I’m gonna put the kettle on and order some lunch.”

Mattsun nods. “Whatever you need to do.” He gives you a small smile and leaves you in the apartment entrance. You can recognize that he’s giving you space and letting you set the boundaries for the conversation to follow, and you appreciate his tact.

After you order the take out and make tea you enter your living room and see Makki and Mattsun sharing your couch. Oikawa is slumped in your armchair, eyelids drooping as he tries to stay away.

“Oikawa you can go back to sleep if you want.” You offer after setting down the tray with tea. He shakes his head at you as you pass out mugs but doesn’t verbalize.

“Okay, if you’re sure.” You settle on the ground by the coffee table, choosing to face your friends instead of sitting next to them. It’s quiet for a few minutes while everyone relaxes in their seats and sips the jasmine tea you’ve made. There’s a tangible tension in the air, stemming from the second Oikawa opened his mouth at the restaurant last night to this very moment. Mattsun and Makki are waiting for you to initiate, for in their eyes you were ready to tear Oikawa limb from limb yesterday and today you greeted them at the door with your tall friend clinging to you.

Plus there's the whole you loving Hajime thing that should be addressed.

You know that your friends would never, ever push you to discuss it. But they’re probably wondering why they weren’t privy to the info, why Oikawa was, and if you don’t trust them or something. The last thing you want is to make your friends doubt the relationship you have with them, so you’re ready to clear the air and address the elephant in the room.

“I love Hajime.” You say. Everyone looks up from their tea to you. “I’ve been in love with him since the first year of high school, I think.”

Predictably, you’re met with matching sad looks. But even though you knew it was coming, you still can’t squirm uncomfortably at the pity you feel coming from them. This was exactly why you didn’t want anyone to know, especially now.

“Were you ever going to tell him?” Mattsun asks quietly.

You shrug, both at his question and the uneasiness settling in your gut “I didn’t feel like I needed to at the time. We were still in high school, still living life. I was happy with our friendship and I didn’t think anything more.” You smile ruefully. “If anything I think I was more worried about not being friends with him anymore if a confession went south.

“Honestly, I didn’t think that there would be a day that I wouldn’t be able to tell him how I felt. Even if I grew out of those feelings, part of me thought I’d be able to confess some day. I don’t regret our friendship, not when I wanted more. But I do regret not being upfront about my feelings with Hajime. He was my best friend, and I should’ve been able to tell him anything.”

You feel tears prick at your eyes and you look down at your tea. “We all have wonderful memories with Hajime, and I will never ever forget him. But it sucks, because while the memories are wonderful I can’t help but think how much better they could’ve been if I told him how I felt about him.”

You sniff, holding back your tears. You look back up and see Oikawa wiping his eyes and Makki sniffling.

Mattsun is looking at you with a serious expression. “I don’t want to go through hypotheticals or explore ‘what ifs,’ but I don’t think I’m alone in saying that Iwazumi cared for you differently than he did us. And I don’t think it was because you were best friends growing up with Oikawa, because he hated Oikawa.”

“Hey!” Oikawa pipes up from his spot, but there’s no real heat behind it.

Mattsun shifts, clearing his throat. When he speaks again his voice is rough with emotion. “You were precious to him, and his actions reflected how much he cared for you.”

You recognize that Mattsun is not outright saying the L-word but his careful alluding makes you smile tearfully. “I know, and he’s always going to hold a special place in my heart.”

Nobody says anything to that, and the room is blanketed with silence again.

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Makki asks quietly, subdued. “Oikawa knew, but me and Issei didn’t.”

You sigh, your chest tight at the wounded look on Makki’s face. “I didn’t mean for Oikawa to find out. And I didn’t want to hide it because I didn’t trust you. But I just didn’t know how to bring it up, especially after Hajime passed away. I just,” you pause, sighing. “We’re all struggling, and I didn’t want you to think differently of me, or I didn’t want you to think that your feelings weren’t valid.”

It’s a lame excuse, but it’s probably the best way you can explain your thoughts. You’re not sure if their feelings are stronger or lesser than yours but you don’t need to know. The varying levels of grief people feel do not need to meet a criteria to be judged. Just because you love Hajime beyond the level of friendship that Oikawa, Mattsun or Makki probably love Hajime doesn’t mean that you “win” the game of grief.

“Y/N,” Mattsun says softly. “We’re your friends, and we want you to come to us with anything. Well, anything you feel comfortable sharing, which I guess in this case you weren’t comfortable with.” Mattsun pauses, it looks like he’s struggling to pick his words. “I do feel pain for you, but mainly because you’ve been dealing with these thoughts alone. I’m sorry if we ever gave you the impression that you couldn’t talk to us.”

You shake your head. “It’s not that, I swear. I just didn’t want to burden you all.”

Mattsun sighs. “I understand, and I don’t want to push you to share anything you don’t want to. But we love Iwaizumi, and if you want to talk about him or need to talk about him, know you can always come to us.”

Makki and Oikawa nod in agreement. You feel your eyes sting again but you smile, because you have the most kind and generous friends you could ask for. Hindsight is 20/20, but your heart does feel lighter knowing that your friends won’t ostracize you or anything because you love Hajime.

“We should’ve known that Oikawa would’ve just confronted Y/N straight on, he’s always been a jerk like that.” Makki says teasingly, trying to lighten the mood.

But instead of squawking in protest or complaining dramatically, Oikawa nods. “Yeah, I’m an asshole.”

Makki’s smile instantly shifts into an uncomfortable frown. “Oikawa, I was just joking -”

“But you’re right.” Oikawa cuts him off firmly. “And I’ve been even worse the past few months. I haven’t been taking care of myself like I should, and I’m sorry taking my frustrations out on you guys.” He takes in a breath. “I’m going to take a break from volleyball so I can make time for my therapy sessions.”

You, Mattsun and Makki all share the same look of surprise. “Oikawa, are you sure?” You can’t help but think back to Oikawa’s reason for not wanting to quit volleyball, and part of you feels guilty for suggesting he take away the strong connection he had to Hajime.

But Oikawa gives you a weak smile. “If Iwa-chan were here, he would call me a dumbass for not taking care of myself.”

“Yeah, he’d probably call you a dumbass and throw a volleyball at your head.” Makki adds. Oikawa squawks at the tease, making everyone in the room laugh.

You smile as you watch Oikawa snap back at Makki, with Mattsun egging them both on. They fall into a routine they’ve established since high school. The one missing component - Hajime either ignoring Oikawa’s calls for backup or sharing comistering looks with you - is obvious, but it doesn’t hurt as much. Your friends’ presence in your apartment fills you with warmth and comfort, like a warm blanket at the end of a hard day.

A knock at the door disrupts your thoughts and you stand to grab the takeout. Mattsun goes to the kitchen to grab plates and utensils, while Oikawa and Makki continue to squabble in the living room. You and Mattsun return to the living room at the same time, causing Makki and Oikawa to call a truce and grab food. There’s a comfortable silence in your apartment as you all fill your plates and settle. As you dig in, an errant thought comes to your mind.

“Oikawa, how do you know where Osamu lives?”

Oikawa speaks around the noodles shoved in his mouth. “I have a fan who works in the registrar’s office and it wasn’t hard to bribe her to look it up.”

“Yeah, that’s something we haven’t talked about yet.” Makki notes, looking right at you.

You avoid his gaze. “About Oikawa’s fans? Yes, it’s ridiculous how crazy they are.”

“That’s not what I was talking about and you know it.”

You glance up, sighing at the looks of intrigue on Makki and Mattsun’s faces. “I was upset last night, and I left my keys at his place. He let me stay because I was upset. We’re just friends.”

Mattsun purses his lips at you, but Makki has a thoughtful look.

“Well, he’s pretty cute. If Mattsun ever gets tired of me I might have to give him a call.”

“Shut up,” you hiss. You know you’re just playing into his trap, and hell would have to freeze over before Mattsun and Makki broke up but you couldn’t even hold back your distaste at the idea.

The smirk on Makki’s face only grows. “Oh, is Osamu into possessiveness?”

“Excuse me?” You ask darkly.

“He said you were possessive.” Oikawa helpfully supplies with his mouth full of food. You’re about to yell at him for manners when Mattsun speaks up.

“You’re different around him.”

Uh oh, he’s using the same voice he used earlier when talking about Hajime and you. He’s not teasing you.

“Different how?” You ask quietly.

He shrugs. “Different, like how you acted around Iwaizumi.”

His observation is met with silence, Makki glancing at Mattsun nervously and Oikawa gazing directly at you.

“Do you like Osamu-kun?” Oikawa asks.

“Wow, yet again Oikawa is not scared to ask the hard questions!” Your attempts at deflection do not go well, as Mattsun serves you an intense look.

“Do you like him?”

You push back, rolling your eyes. “I think you guys know more than anyone that I’m in no state to be in a relationship right now.”

“That’s not what we’re asking.” Oikawa replies. He’s still staring at you, but it’s not a mean look on his face. Neither Mattsun nor Makki are looking at you meanly either, but all three of your friends’ eyes bore into you. Oikawa speaks up again. “Do you feel differently about Osamu compared to me, Mattsun and Makki?”

Your first instinct is to say no because you do see him as you see your friends. You think of all of the conversations you’ve both had about school and classes. And you think of all the stories you’ve shared about growing up in Sendai and your likes, dislikes.

You would even say that you and Osamu are best friends, given how much you’ve relied on him when it comes to dealing with Iwaizumi. A twinge of guilt twists in your stomach as you worry that maybe you rely on him too much. He has his own burdens to carry.

But at the end of the day, you just know that he’d be there for you. And he’s shown time and time again that he will be there for a late night phone call or a shoulder to cry on.

Even those late night text conversations when you’re too scared to fall asleep. Or how the way he supports is different to Makki, Mattsun and Oikawa.

But why? Why is it different?

Is it because he didn’t know the Y/N you were when you were younger? He didn’t know the Y/N that existed before high school?

He doesn’t know you from before Hajime died. He’s seen this raw, broken-down version of you. And he still wants to talk to you. He still wants to hang out and get coffee and be with you.

And in return, you know this raw, broken-down version of Osamu. Honestly, you could care less if the Osamu you never knew was the richest man in the world, or the smartest man alive. The Osamu now has been shaped and has grown from every experience he’s lived, the good and the bad. And everytime you talk you find out more about him that draws you in more. You’re never going to be satisfied until you find out everything about him. You’re not sure if it’s obsession or infatuation, but every little fact you unearth brings you a joy that you haven’t felt in some time.

You revel in the small expressions he shows around you and your ability to decipher his mood based on those looks. You shine when he focuses on you, his intense gaze indicating that he’s giving you his full attention on you and only you.

You felt safe with the strong arm around your shoulders when you felt like breaking. You felt comforted when he wiped your tears from your face.

You felt loved.

You look up at your friends, amazed.

“Oh my god, I think I like Osamu.”

The boys nod their head at you, none of them surprised by your revelation. You look down at your full plate, appetite long gone. You honestly can’t believe you’ve been so blind. Looking back it was so OBVIOUS that you’ve had feelings for Osamu for a long time.

Another thought crosses your mind, much more displeasing than your realizing your feelings for Osamu. “I don’t think I’m ready for a relationship though.”

The boys nod at you again. This time Oikawa isn’t able to hold back his eyes roll. “Well obviously.”

You shrink down, feeling a new level of low. There’s no way you could try to pursue a relationship with Osamu, not now. But what if he wants to? What if he returns your feelings and wants to date you? Or worse, what if he doesn’t accept your feelings and doesn’t want to be your friend anymore?

“Y/N-chan, get out of your head.” Oikawa sing-songs, and it does bring you out of your head. You look at him and frown.

“I don’t know what to do.”

“Babe, you don’t have to do anything.” Makki replies.

“But I want to.” You say instantly. “I mean, I think I want to, or I should?”

“But you know that you’re not in the right headspace to pursue a relationship now.” Mattsun reminds you gently. “And making sure you’re healthy enough to give the relationship all that you can is important.”

You nod sadly, agreeing. But your face must display your disappointment, so Oikawa sets his plate down and comes to sit by you.

“Look, just take it day by day. Nothing really has to change, you just have a different outlook on your relationship with Osamu.” He grabs your hand and holds it in both of his. “Instead of looking through a plain window, you’re looking through a stained glass window, right? It’s still Osamu out there, and he’s still the same person you like and want to be with. But now your relationship with him is richer and more vibrant. Even if you can’t act on your feelings now, you still have this new and beautiful view.”

You stare at Oikawa, dumbfounded. Mattsun and Makki look equally surprised at the deep and meaningful comparison Oikawa pulled out of nowhere.

“Wow,” Makki eventually says. “I didn’t know you could be so romantic, Oikawa.”

“Excuse you, I’m very romantic!” Oikawa snaps back indignantly. “Anyway, Y/N-chan, I guarantee that Osamu will be willing to wait. He’ll be patient, especially with you.”

“What would you know about patience?” Makki asks, genuine confusion in his voice.

Oikawa snaps again wordlessly, his tone shrill. You and Mattsun laugh, and the rest of the day is filled with everyone laughing and teasing each other.

At some point you take a second to look at your friends and smile. Your lives are unimaginably hard, and Hajime missing from these get-togethers still makes your heart ache. But with Oikawa, Mattsun and Makki here to soothe the pain, you know you can get through the worst of it.

• ────── ✾ ────── •

A/N: Okay, so all the cards on the table - I cried during the entire writing process with this chapter - planning it, drafting it, writing it, finalizing it AND even reviewing it. It’s not the first time I’ve had emotional reactions to my own writing, but it’s the first time it’s been such a visceral reaction. Not only is it so satisfying to see that small character growth from Oikawa, but the character growth from Y/N was oh so satisfying. She is FINALLY opening up to her friends, and they are FINALLY having a conversation that has been MONTHS in the making. She isn’t scared to suppress her feelings anymore, and she FINALLY trusts herself to open up to her friends, despite her subconscious trying to protect her from being vulnerable in front of those she cares about. If you’re reading this now, please know that there is NOTHING wrong with being open and forthcoming about your feelings. The people in your life who love you unconditionally, including me, will THANK you for it. 💖💖💖 Okay, gonna go cry again after writing this A/N LOLOLOL.

Taglist Open! Please send an Ask with the request to be added to It’s [Not] Okay Fic & SMAU: @psycho-nightrose @camcam1617 @kamalymaly @toobsessedsstuff @shookykookie30 @roro-707 @qualitygiantshoepsychic @cerealfrdinner797 @ara-mitsue @gray-444 @tanakasimpcorner @rintarovibes @jellien @everytimeswift @bongofrito @babucrow @beidouluvr @kozuken-ma @imarriedachef

[mingishoe]

[6:20pm] “What? Is that turning you on? So disgusting.” W/ Hongjoong

⋆ ⋆ ⋆

You had just gotten back from eating with Seonghwa and you were making your way to the practice room where Hongjoong was.

You had opened the door but immediately stopped in your tracks when you saw that Hongjoong was live.

Hongjoong waved to you to come inside and sit next to him but you hesitated. You shook your head with heated cheeks, atiny has never seen you before.

“It’s y/n!” Your eyes widened as Hongjoog pulled you into frame, “It’s okay, you don’t need to be nervous. Atiny already loves you.”

You saw the comments filling with positive remarks and cute emojis so you slowly sat down next to Hongjoong, bringing your whole body into frame.

The comments filled with keyboard smashes and comments of how perfect the two of you looked together making you shove your head in your hands out of embarrassment.

Hongjoong held onto your hand and brought it down in his lap where he rubbed your knuckles softly.

You read and answered some of the questions that were being asked as you felt Hongjoong messing with your hand. You kept glancing over to him with furrowed eyebrows because he totally wasn’t going to do what you thought he was going to do.

As you were reading some more of the comments Hongjoong shoved your hand in his sweats making your mouth drop. “Anyway, y/n is super close with all the boys too… y/n always takes care of all of us super well.” You almost rolled your eyes whenever you saw the smirk Hongjoong was giving you, “Isn’t that right?”

You blinked at Hongjoong, “Right…” as you said that, you swiftly pulled Hongjoong out of his pants.

Hongjoong focused himself on replying to comments and tried not to focus on your hand that was on his cock.

You scooted closer to Hongjoong so it wouldn’t look suspicious as you looked down at your phone where you had the live open.

Hongjoong slowly started to move his hips to get more friction because he could tell you were terrified of accidentally getting it on the live.

He looks at you with a cocked head, “It’s okay.” Hongjoong turns to the camera, “Y/n is still a little bit nervous, but it’s okay, right?”

You let out a breathy laugh as you saw the comments fill with more comforting words, not knowing what was going on below the camera.

You let Hongjoong grind into your hand until you finally get the courage to jerk him properly.

Hongjoong groaned and then quickly covered it up by complaining about a member afterwards. Hongjoong turns to you and looks at you with red cheeks. You can tell it looked a little bit intense… or maybe a little bit wrong… so you ruffled Hongjoong’s hair with your free hand and turned your attention back to the phone.

“How did you two meet?” You read the question out loud and laugh as you start to circle the head of his swollen cock, “Remember Joong?”

Hongjoongs face got even more red as he remembered the incident. You had actually walked in on him touching himself but obviously you couldn’t say that, “Well, it was like 7 months ago, and I had been friends with Wooyoung for a while at that point so he invited me over to the dorms to meet the rest of the boys.”

Hongjoong had his face in his hands from both remembering the embarrassment and how close he was to cuming, “So when I went to the dorms Wooyoung answered the door and sent me to his room to go get something, but… I walked into the wrong room and- there was Hongjoong…'' you paused to laugh a couple of times from the story and how Hongjoong was withering next to you.

You leaned into Hongjoongs ear and spoke below a whisper so the phone wouldn’t be able to pick it up, “What? Is that turning you on? So disgusting. Do you know how many people are watching me get you off? 100 thousand. And all of them are about to see you cum, aren’t they?”

Hongjoong nodded pathetically and you pulled away, “That’s crazy isn’t it?! It was super awkward at first though because I had kinda barged in on him… but in the end it worked out!”

You purposely spoke louder so your voice would cover up any small sounds Hongjoong could’ve been making, “And of course I’m still friends with Wooyoung but the one I ended up with was this one.” You giggled softly and gestured to only the top of Hongjoong’s head that could be seen with how he crouched down.

“Can y’all believe he gets so flustered about it? Can't even mention it because he gets like that.” Hongjoong was throbbing in your hand and he was so so close.

You smirked softly, “And Hongjoong is the best leader. He takes care of all the members so well but sometimes he forgets to take care of himself so that’s what I’m here for! I try to take care of the other members as well because they all need a little break once in a while…” Hongjoong could practically see the smirk on your face and the visual alone was too much for him, and he came.

You were surprised Hongjoong was as quiet as he was but you didn’t complain as you tried to come up with more things to say to distract from Hongjoong who was basically completely out of frame.

You slowed your hand down because of the slight squelching sound that was ringing in your ears until you finally stopped your movements all together.

Hongjoong finally lifted himself back into frame and you laughed at his red cheeks and glossy eyes, “Are you done?” You tap his cheeks gently, “Now why don’t you tell Atiny about our first date?”