#i am sane i am not ill i am okay (i promise) i am so fucking normal i even go to normal school i swear

[absolute-lithops-effecting]

At this point the normal album is fucking tattooed to my brain. I'm looking at it like an old man looking at a tattoo he got in his youth and thinking, "what a good time that was", knowing very well that he got this tattoo during the time he almost died from drinking too much booze. I was severely depressed during that time why is this nostalgic??

[circebutbetter]

Ao3 || pinterest || airbuds || spotify || secret 5th thing

Hard to describe something ill never miss"

☆my name is Jana/circe!

☆my pronouns are she/her

☆biggest hater of green apples ever ever I HATE THEM THEY SUCK UGHHSGEHE

☆an avid reader and an wven bigger music consumer

☆biromantic/asexual/IN A QPR<3 @garden-of-runar

Transphobes, racists, homophobes, abelists literally anyone who somehow somewhat fits into these catogories is not welcome on this blog<3

Otherwise my ask box is open!

♤Interest(?): marauders, the secret history, a series of unfortunate events, my babysitters a vampire, the hunger games, fnaf, true crime, murders, cannibalism, bugs (although i hate them sigh), makeup, law(?), conspiracies, rabbit holes, weird stuff ™, mythology, MORE STUFF IVE BEEN IN SO MAMY FANDOMS BEFORE SO YES I KNOW LORE 💔

im not weird i promise <3 im very sane and normal☝️☝️

Dislikes: GREEN FUCKING APPLES RAHHHHHHHHH, polos, umum alot of thibgs i js dk how to list them☝️

Music: olivia rodrigo, paramore, flyleaf, wisp, pierce the veil, billie eilish, falling in reverse, mother mother, the living tombstone, my chemical romance, deftones, paramore, nirvana, MITSKI, david bowie<3, alex g, liily, south arcade, sleeping with sirens, black sabbath, YEAH THERES MORE I LISTEN TO BASUCALLY EVERYTHING SIGH

slytherin, child of apollo(cabin 7), entp-t, sag

☆☆☆

LOVELY LOVELY PEOPLE<33:

@garden-of-runar SIGH GUYS RUE IS LITERALLLYYY THE SUN PERSONIFIED ANDNADN SOSOSO COOL LIKE UM DUDE WHAT AND MY PLATONIC PARTNER <333 AND MY LIKE WIFE/P LIKE RAHHH🩷🩷🩷 MAJOR CHAOTIC ENERGY HIS LIFE IS LITERALLY A MOVIE??( she got stuck in a chait once guys a CHAIR)(The Time Runar Got Stuck Upside Down In A Chair For An Hour ™)

@definitionoffuckup STAR ML HES LIKE LOWKEY AMAZING GUYS has his issues but is literally wonderfuk and deserves everything good and also has no sense of online safety like um☝️☝️andand lowkey one of my favorites on tumblr☝️☝️☝️

@omelettejunkie ethan. Is there anything more to say? Jkjk ethan ,eeth, eef ,spleen , eef the furry and an omelette junkie through and through (theres rumoirs of alcoholism too but hmm☝️☝️) also has the most diverse music taste ive ever met

@kawaiibarty JAMES❗️ bigges loser ive met but also the coolest loser ive met MASTER OF PLAYLISTS AND HAD A BOMB MUSIC TASTE LIKE UM❗️❗️ also really very chaotic, gives off major chaotic energy, jim carrey guys☝️

@thestrawberryapologist SIGH I HAVENT KNOWN MARI FOR LONG BUT SHES A WONDERFUL PERSON WITH A WONDERFUL PERSONALITY <3 THE SHERLOCK TO MY WATSON (sigh j wabted to be sherlock NTBUT FJNTE)

@stargazing-reader NEPHYTHEIS 💓💓💓 they're one of my first mutuals here and one of the best people ive ever ever met, sososoos smart and has so much passion for almost everything they do and im highkey sososososo glad ive met them like <3

@hershey-the-confused LAUGHS AT MY SUFFERING ALL THE TIME SMH ANDANDAND TORTUROSUD ME WITH GREEN APPLES but overall theyre sosososo fun to talk to although a bit frustrating (in thr most loving way ever its very fun) ANDAND LOWKEY MY EMO IN LAW VERYVERY COOL PERSON☝️

@cheekyboybeth THE CHAPPELL ROAN TO MY OLIVIA RODRIGO, super duper cool with an obsession with cannibalism(relatable) and SUPER COOL THOIGH LIKE OKAY

@calypso10191 SIGH IDK WHERE THEYVE GONE RN BUT IM WAITING FOR CALYPSO TO CIME BACK SIGH

@asters-tempo COMES INTO MY ASK BOX ALOT, LOVELIVELOVE INTERACTING EM ANDAND bread collecter and axolotel personafied VERY COOL YET AWFULLY TERRIBLE AT TAKING CARE OF EMSELFs

@here-am-i-sitting-in-a-tin-can SKYE❗️❗️❗️ sososos cool and wonderful to interact with, also tortupsus me with green apples andand idk wonderful all around

@the-stars-drowning ONE OF THE CUTEST PEOPLE IVE MET ON HERE<3 LIKE SUCH A JOY TO INTERACT WITH I CANT LIKE MWAH💓💓💓

If ive missed anyone tell me so i can add you sigh MWAH💔 IF YOU WANNA BE UNTAGGED TELL ME <3

Moodboard(one of my most treasured thibgs ever made for me) made for me by @hershey-the-confused <333

GASP GUYS THIS IS LIEK OME OF MY FAVORITE MOODBOARDS MADE BY ONE OF MY FAV PEOPLE LOKE RAH MOODBOARD MADE BY @definitionoffuckup

GYYS THIS IS LITERAAAALLLLYYYY MR LIKE ME IRL THIS IS ME AND THIS WAS MADE BY THE ONE AND ONLY @starcrossedmoony

CHAPPELL ROAN AND OLIVIA MADE BY THE CHAPPELL TO MY OLIVIA💓💓💓 MADE BY @cheekyboybeth

[strayheartless]

a nsfw situation i can read basically any person's interpretation on over and over again and never be bored is sephiroth's first time!!! especially in ags, like if he's topping who's bottoming for him and who's coaching? if he's bottoming who's topping and who's holding him and keeping him safe? i think it's a good entry point for nsfw because you can do a loooooottt of character study and just throw in some smutty parts. like is it all fluff or are seph and gen still playfighting the entire time? is angeal mediating or is he too busy working as the top or the bottom to focus right? do they even go all the way or is seph going to be too overwhelmed and finish before the "main event"?

sorry if that's not specific enough haahaha, but starting smut can be intimidating and sometimes just dipping your toes into sharing the thoughts is the best way to start! and at the end of the day I am but a mere sane!sephi being a bottom truther 😌

oki doki! I've gotten over the fear with the first ask, so I'm gonna try answering some more. I am once again shocked by how fast people jumped into my asks for this one lol.

okay Sephs first time with AG. (why didnt I do this one first its so much less scary than Aerith and Tifa!):

*warnings for suggested non-con of someone underage. there will be no detail (ever) but its implied. please be careful*

the first thing that Angeal and Genesis have to seriously concider when approaching the topic of sex with Seph is that he is all at once, completely new to it and knows about it in disturbingly clinical detail. They don't really want to know why, and they can see in his eyes that he doesn't want to tell them either.

Sephiroth has been a symbol all his life and the issue with that is that at a certain point in his teen years it became strangely acceptable for people of all gender expressions to fawn over him in ways that make him uncomfortable. People seem to always speak and act without thinking without considering him and its upsetting.

Meeting Angeal and Genesis however is different. mostly because the first time he met angeal the other boy just wanted to get the job done and be friends. nothing more nothing less. He'll admit to being a little infatuated with Angeal from the word go but 'Geal had said he was in "a commited relationship" and Sephiroth had taken him at his word.

To bad he had a crush on Angeals "committed relationship" the second he layed eyes on Genesis. why? well because Genesis was beautiful and also trying to activly kill him at the time.... you know that scene from Princess Mononke? the one with the knife and the ill timed realisations of beauty? yeah thats Sephiroth meeting Genesis.

As time goes on and their relationship changes the topic of sex starts to come up more and more, much to Seph ire. he doesn't want to talk about it but they always seem to circle back to it. Usually at Genesis' behest. usually at Angeals allowence. its how they find out he's a virgin in the first place.

And nothing is done about that for a VERY long time. At least not until Sephiroth wants something more.

The night that he asks them to be his first time they look at eachother and agree they will never hurt him this way. it is the only promise they made that they did not later brake. they NEVER used sex as a way to upset him. not ever. instead they run him a bath, and clean him up. Genesis brushes his hair while Angeal massages his calfs and he relaxes into it.

When he's slightly boneless they take turns kissing him and helping him discover what feels good. They go slow, and when it doesn't feel good they stop and try something else. Its a lot but he finally decides a list of things.

He likes being in Angeals arms a lot.

he likes it when Gena kisses up his thighs and teases his cock.

he likes having Angeals fingers inside of him

His chest is sensitive and after a while its not fun anymore, but he likes a little bit.

He loves letting Genesis ride him.

But he loves letting Angeal fuck him slow and gentle like he's worth everything.

he doesnt like pain play

he does like sensory deprevation play

he adores being praised but he stuggles to accept it

he goes into subspace a little too easily.

being on his knees for Either Gen or 'Geal is intimidating every time but he is eager when they guide him through it.

having something in his mouth calms him down. it can be his partners cocks of their fingers.

he doesn't like being restrained

but he does like being fucked while either man laces their fingers with his.

his favorite pet names include 'pretty baby', 'my heart' and 'sweet boy'

he likes calling Angeal 'sir'

being hand fed puts him in subspace

he has a thing about cock warming (as in he loves it) both with his mouth and his body.

and the last and perhaps most devistating detail is that he is so irrevicably in love with these men. They won't just be his first. they will be his only. And on nights when he stands on the edge of creation and lets himself stray a little from his mothers voice, a fantom ache will start deep within his soul. An ache to be laid out on Angeals bed as he is slowly taken apart on his side, angeal behind, Genesis in front... all of them in love.

aimed for smut, made it sad.... oh well.

[sosa-royals]

KB: Hey

Francine: What?

KB: I know you've been in a bad mood lately because of everything that's going on

Francine: And?

KB: Not and, but. This has got to stop Frankie. Have you even spoken to any of the girls since you moved in?

Francine: Do I need to?

KB: You haven't talked to anyone about how you're feeling, So yes, I think so

Francine: I haven't spoken to anyone because what good would come out of it? The girls can't give me any answers because they know as much as I do, which is nothing!

KB: Well I'm afraid I can't give you any answers either... but I can at least help you feel better

Francine: I'm not supposed to drink-

KB: -Unsupervised

Francine: And you're supposed to be my supervisor for tonight?

KB: What? Am I not good enough?

Francine: ...And then my dad who's such a f*** psychopath apparently convinced my mom to have an affair but that was all a scheme cooked up by my wretched uncle Ferdinand

KB: Hey, don't speak ill of the dead

Francine: Shut up KB

Francine: I always knew I was the only sane one in this family... and poor Raph... I wonder how he's coping. You know, the worst part is, I don't even know if any of it is true, and there's no way for me to confirm it

Francine: I'm so pissed off

KB: Frankie-

Francine: Shut up

KB: Hey, look at me, don't cry

Francine: Shut up. I'm not crying you idiot! And it's not because I'm sad either

KB: Then why is your face wet?

Francine: Because I'm in pain, okay? My stupid... heart hurts and I hate this

KB: Look at me, everything is going to be fine okay? We've gotten through difficult times in the past and we'll get through this too. Together

Francine: Promise me

KB: I promise

Next | Previous

[late-to-the-magnus-archives]

Peach Pit - a Magnus Archives Fic

An AU Somewhere Else - part of the Magnus Monsterverse series.

Spoilers for the whole podcast.

Something is definitely unusual about Jon's experience with the Eye.

Several cheesy sci-fi explanations and eight Jonah Magnuses later, Jon has more questions than ever - but at least it seems like he might have found a new friend.

AO3

-------

Manuela’s printout made my head spin.

If I let go, if I relaxed the willed mitosis that kept me sane—that retained me as me and not an It to It— her printout would all make sense. 

It tried—pushed that temptation before me, promised without words what utter bliss it would be to know everything here and now.

It would be bliss. I know it would. But that was not what I wanted.

Pleasure is not permission, I told It, because whether or not It understood those words, I did.

“Would you mind explaining what this is and how you obtained it?” I said.

She looked quite surprised. “You don’t just know?”

“I could.” They were all listening. I suddenly wondered if this were a test. “I have no intention of ever giving the Eye unfettered access to my mind again, however, and so, I am limited.”

“Amazing,” said Leitner, clapping his hands together and startling me. “Remarkable. I knew you’d be safe to bring here.”

“Hush,” said Gertrude. “You mean that, do you?”

So it was a test. “Yes.” 

“Even if your lover passed away again?” she said, and I didn’t care what Leitner claimed—those were the eyes of someone who would absolutely try to kill me.

But I wasn’t what I once was.

I knew fear. I certainly had plenty of my own. Yes, I was scared of Jane, of Sarah, of what they could all do.

But I was a little bit scary myself, now. Of course, I could probably still die—but I wasn’t sure how anymore.

I had to take a moment to answer. “First… are you threatening him?”

Her eyebrows rose. “No.”

“Okay. Well, there’s no reason to assume he’ll die for a very long time.”

“The Lonely does not extend lifespan,” Gertrude said.

“Yes, but he’s healthy, lacks genetic predispositions toward inheritable illnesses, and currently suffers from nothing so much as a lack of sleep.” I froze, mouth open.

Gertrude’s lips quirked. “Only that, eh? I thought you weren’t knowing things.”

“Apparently, when it’s really important, it slips through,” I said primly.

Gertrude snorted. “Still. You avoided my question.”

“No, I’m laying foundation for an answer. I’m not wracked by fear of him dying.” I stopped, swallowed, continued. “Also, I don’t think I can express how badly depressed I was when this… when he was murdered.”

His hand was my anchor.

“And a thousand years engulfed in that didn’t make it worse?”

“No, because the Eye was trying to comfort me,” I said, because it was true. “It’s stupid, though. Meant well, I truly believe, but is stupid—and so all it knew to do was remove me from the hurt.”

“Meant well?” said Gertrude with great disbelief.

“The Eye loves me. Damned if I know why,” I said.

She stared. “They don’t love people.”

“They certainly do. It just doesn’t generally turn out well for the object of that love.”

They all stared at me. Gertrude looked offended. Manuela looked fascinated. Leitner was unreadable behind his stupid green spectacles.

They were being ridiculous. “This shouldn’t be that strange,” I said. “They may not be living things like us, but they certainly have tastes and preferences.”

“I knew it! ” said Manuela, slamming her fist into her thigh.

“Manuela,” Leitner started. 

“They have tastes! Opinions! Thoughts!”

“Only in the most basic sense,” I said. “Look, we’ve dropped off the point: I wouldn’t be great if he died, no. But I wouldn’t do what I did then, either. I don’t know how much you know about what happened, but when m… when…” Martin squeezed my hand, and I could keep going. “When he died, we’d been walking for uncountable time through a living hellscape, a nightmare world in which every living thing capable of suffering did, and all their misery was shoved forcefully into my brain.”

Gertrude frowned. “Wait a moment. Are you saying the world ended before you entered your thousand year state?”

“Yes.”

She frowned harder. “Explain.” 

“When Martin died, the world already belonged to the Beholding.”

“How?”

“I was tricked by a man named Jonah Magnus,” I said.

Manuela stiffened.

“What?” Oh, no, I wasn’t letting that go. “What?”

“We just found one,” she said.

I stared at her. “One… what?”

“I mean, we know of eight,” she said, glancing between Gertrude and Leitner and me. “But there’s one who’s actually ready to fetch. His world’s ended. His Fear is feeding on him, and he’s not having a good time. So, I mean. What do you mean, he tricked you?”

So I didn’t know what my face did.

I felt pale. I felt… sort of tingly and numb ( vasoconstriction, the narrowing of blood vessels due to emotional stress). I realized I wasn’t breathing only because Martin came around, knelt in front of me, and cupped my face.

“Hey,” he said.

Him. His eyes. Him. I melted into him, against him, clung to him like a rock in a storm. 

“I’ve got you,” he whispered. “You’re okay.”

I was shaking. “You don’t understand who he is.”

Martin knew I wasn’t talking to him.

“We do,” said Gertrude. “Possibly more than you, since you’ve only encountered one of him.”

“No, you don’t know who he is,” I said, sitting up, glaring over Martin’s shoulder. “You don’t know what he’s capable of!”

“Ending the world, evidently,” said Leitner. “Like you.”

“No, not like me! At least the damage I did, I did with my own damn hands!” I snapped.

“Shhh. Jon. I get it. They will too, in time. Shhh. It’s not that one. It’s not that Jonah.” Martin hesitated. “I mean. They said everyone in your world was dead, so it couldn’t be that Jonah, could it?”

“What happened to him in your timeline, Martin? When you had to kill me.”

Manuela flinched at the words—and that was right. That’s how it should be. She had a human heart, and I really, really liked her.

“You killed him,” Martin whispered. “You stabbed him and took his place.”

My jaw dropped. “Oh,” I said after a long moment.

He watched me. Watching for… I don’t know. Some response.

My face burned. “I didn’t stab him.”

“What did you do, then?” said Leitner, sounding absolutely fascinated.

“I ate him.”

“You what? ” said Gertrude.

“I mean… not literally.” Fuck it. I pressed my face to Martin’s shoulder. I didn’t want to see how anyone was looking at me now.

“How?” whispered Martin.

Him, I could answer. Him, I would answer. “After you died. After I… lost myself completely. After I turned to the Eye, because… everything else was already gone. When it had me, when it… eased me. We went to the Panopticon.”

“We?”

“I... I suppose it was an I, but not really. It was we.”

“Go on,” murmured Martin.

I sighed. “Jonah was fine with it. If that matters.”

“Fine with what?” said Leitner.

“Becoming one with the Eye. That’s what he thought of it as.”

“And… what did you think of it as?” said Leitner. “What did you even do?”

“I don’t know how to explain that,” I mumbled into Martin’s shoulder. “The Eye ate him. I was the Eye. But we didn’t literally eat? His body fell and rotted. I don’t know.”

“That’s absurd,” said Leitner.

“It’s incredible,” said Manuela. “Jon. I need to pick your brain. Please.”

I sighed. “I don’t know anything, Manuela. Not really.”

“But your experiences, your impressions—”

“Manuela,” Leitner began in a chiding tone.

“Please, Jon,” said Manuela. “I’ll pay you.”

I paused. “Shit. We do need money here, don’t we?”

Gertrude laughed. She sounded like she hadn’t expected to. “You were floating for a while, weren’t you?”

My face burned again. “Oh, yes. Freed from the demands of Capitalism. How very blessed I was,” I drawled.

“Please,” said Manuela again.

“I don’t think it’s appropriate,” Leitner said.

Maneula flipped him off. He sighed.

Right. She reminded me of Sasha, and had summarily gone from liked to among my favorite people territory. “If you really think it’ll do any good, yes. I will,” I said. “Ah… about Jonah…”

“Let’s discuss that as part of everything,” she said. “Obviously, we don’t want Jonah here if he’s a danger.”

“He is,” I said.

“Let’s find out together! Nothing’s decided yet, after all. Here.” She dug into her pocket and produced a business card. “We’ve barely even talked about you yet. Listen—I have satellite feeds monitoring everything. Surges of power (which are observable via atmospheric and magnetic disturbance, heat, radiation, and more, believe it or not), increases in psychological events or unexpected deaths… you have no idea.”

“It sounds like a police state,” I said before I could help myself.

She shook her head. “I’m the only one who gets to see all of it—as annoyed as that makes some people —and I don’t have any authority to act on it, nor the power to do so even if I did.”

I stared at her business card; I was still draped on Martin, and I did not give a damn who saw. (Maybe a little. Maybe I did it at them, as well.) “Do I… call you?” All it had was her name and a number.

“Yes! I’ll come get you.”

“Portal travel?”

“Well, I’m based out of the Alps, so yes, you’ll prefer that.”

“Oh.” I swallowed. “So. Tell me what happened. What I did. Cliff’s Notes.”

She looked thrilled. “I’m calling it prisming.”

“Weird nomenclature? You?” said Gertrude, dryly. “Thought I’d never see the day.”

“Prisming,” said Manuela, like tuning back in after a commercial break. “Of course, you understand the concept—when light, passing through glass, slows and bends at different wavelengths, separating into the colors that make up light, which we normally can’t see.”

Martin snorted. “Are we really doing that goofy sci-fi movie trope?”

I pulled back to stare at him. “What are you talking about?”

His smile was so adorable I wanted to wrap it around my heart like a blanket. “We have got to fix your viewing habits. These movies—they’ll  be talking about something wild like the loss of Earth’s magnetic field, and then they’ll demonstrate it by roasting a peach pit with hairspray and a lighter.”

I laughed.

I laughed hard. I couldn’t help it. It had been so long since I’d encountered anything so silly. “What! What? You’re joking!”

“Not even a little,” he said, utterly pleased with himself.

“You ought to already know about such things,” said Gertrude warily.

It was another test, but I was still laughing and couldn’t be bothered being intimidated this time. “The Eye knows everything, but doesn’t interact with it. That’s a human response.” I wiped my eyes. My smile faded. “I told you the condition it had me in. Believe me, I spent no time with nonsense like that. I would have missed Martin too much.”

Except… It did care about things now, didn’t It?

It was amused by Brother Love. This was new; I could feel it, feel that this development was relatively recent. How could this be? 

I was not going to volunteer the question. Not yet.

“Hm,” Gertrude said. “And do you have the memoirs of all It knew?”

“I honestly don’t know. I feel like I’ve woken from a coma—which I have done, by the way. You’re not… you feel very weird for a while. You are yourself, but not.”

“You were in a coma?” said Manuela. “Tell me about it?”

“We haven’t even finished the current conversation.”

“I don’t think we’ll finish this one for a while,” said Manuela, back on track. “I haven’t figured out how you did it. To be honest, I assumed you’d understand this,” she said, holding up the printout, “and could help explain it to me.”

“Oh.” Disappointed. Embarrassed. “I could try to help?”

Leitner sighed. “Really, Manuela?”

“Well, this is quite new,” she said. “None of the Eye avatars have done anything like this before.”

I blinked at her. “They haven’t?”

“No. It’s one of the reasons I want to investigate your theory about the Eye liking you. That could be what makes this different.”

“But then what are other avatars like?”

“Lenses. Magnification, clarification, seeing through whatever to the truth of things.”

“Peach pits,” Martin mumbled, and set me off again.

“Well,” I finally said. “There may be a way to access all that knowledge, but right now, I don’t know how to do it safely. The Eye is too used to having all of me. It’s a fire hydrant, not a faucet.” I grinned at Martin.

He grinned back and rolled his eyes.

“Right, well,” said Manuela. “What you did is somehow break the hunter—who is effective because they are basically combinations of various avatars—into individual parts. That’s not a little thing.”

“Wait. I did? And they’re what, merged ? Like some sort of Flesh abomination?”

“Not at all. It’s much more homogeneous than that.”

“They’re working together?” Horror erased what amusement I had.

“Or being forced to.”

I stared at her. “Why would someone do that? We’re up against some… mad scientist of the Fears? How is that even possible?”

“We don’t know, but it seems like that, doesn’t it? It’s the reason Jurgen decided to bring people like you here who’d do anything to stop it—it was already happening when we arrived. Otherwise, we’d have to watch the world end again.”

Martin’s eyes were huge. It seemed I wasn’t the only one hearing this for the first time.

“Are you going to tell him everything?” said Leitner, dry.

“Am I going to tell… an avatar of the Eye…” Manuela began with such sarcasm that I think even Tim would’ve been impressed.

“Yes, all right, fair point,” Leitner said, sounding pouty.

He probably wanted to feel important by doling things out. That, or he didn’t trust me. Well, that went both ways. “And why are they called hunters, then?” I said. “Is that the primary Fear they’re made of, or something?”

“No, that was just the name sticking before we could be clever about it,” she said.

That made sense. Humans did that sort of thing—not that I was about to share such an observation. It would make me sound too far outside humanity.

I wasn’t. I was still me. I had to believe that.

“Jurgen, I’m done here,” said Gertrude. “If there’s nothing else for me to do…?”

“You are?” He sounded so surprised.

“Yes. I have come to my conclusion.”

I peered at her over Martin’s shoulder.

“You have?” said Leitner.

“I’ll send you my report, but some of us don’t have the luxury of sitting around in plush chairs all day, staring at stained glass.”

I couldn’t help snorting. 

“Everyone is in such a mood today,” said Leitner, and waved his hand at her dismissively. “I want that report.”

Gertrude waved back—with far more disdain than he’d managed—and simply left without another word to us.

“Was that good?” I murmured.

“Hell if I know,” Martin murmured back. “She didn’t come stare at me in any of my meetings.”

“Well, you not knowing alters things,” Manuela said, “but it’s not a dead end. Give me a few days to correlate and collect more data, then let’s talk.”

“All right. I can do that.”

“I think the question, Jon, is whether you can do it again,” said Leitner.

“I don’t know. I’d advise not making any plans around an incident hat could’ve been a fluke,” I said.

“Do you think it was?” Leitner said evenly.

“I don’t know. It could have been some lingering effect of… everything. It’s a risk. Don’t plan around it.”

He huffed. “Fine. But you could save lives.”

“If that’s the case, we’ll figure something out—but I won’t risk anyone in the process,” I said.

And this time, I received the dismissive hand-wave. “If there’s nothing else, Manuela?”

She grinned at me. “A week.”

“A week. I’ll call.”

She stood, gathered her lawn chair, looked around as though to be certain she hadn’t dropped anything, and opened a portal.

I almost saw how she did it—her lenses example, seeing where she wanted to go, and in the process, tunneling a way there.

Was that good? Did it damage something? I had no idea.

She was gone, and it was significantly less comfortable with only Leitner staring at us. “You really are proving to be as interesting as I’d hoped,” he said.

“I… you’re welcome?” I said, uncertain as to the pleasantries in this situation.

“We’ll obviously need to dive into this further, but both Manuela and Gertrude seem to think you are no threat to us—which was my main concern.”

“And you’d have done what, if they thought otherwise?” I said.

“Well, I don’t know. We’d attempt capture and rehabilitation.”

“Like Nikola.”

“Yes. Taking your life would be the absolute last step. We’ve had enough death. All of us.”

I needed to see Nikola for myself before determining whether that truly was the better option. “I don’t intend to die or harm anyone. I just want to live, and I don’t mean mere survival. All of this took my life from me.”

“I understand,” he said, and sounded like he did. “It’s what they all want, and I try to give opportunity for.”

It was awkward now for a different reason. I wished I could just believe him; it would be lovely if he were honest. 

And maybe he was, but that would have to be proven over time. “Are we done?”

“Yes. Oh—stop and see Agnes on your way out. She’ll give you a lunch voucher.”

Oh. All right.

We held hands and left.

Agnes was indeed there—her hair cut short, dressed as though it were 35 Celsius in here. She smiled; she eyed me in a way I was coming  to recognize as Oh, I killed you in my world, and handed us little coupons for lunch across the street.

We both knew we’d be saving those coupons for later.

I waited until we were outside again before speaking. “How can you stand me?”

“What?” Martin said, startled.

My voice shook. “They all kill me. Even you had to kill me. I drove everyone to it. How can you even—”

He kissed me. Arms around, holding tight so I could not blow apart. “I didn’t want to. You didn’t drive me to it. It was the Web’s plan from start to finish.”

I stared at him.

“She was trying to eacape,” he said. “But to do that, the Eye had to be lured to another world—and that could only happen with you as both bait and bear trap. We both fell for it, Jon. It wasn’t your fault.”

I stared more. “You’ve spent a lot of time thinking about this.”

“I did. If it was your fault, I’d tell you. But all you did was be yourself, not know what you were doing, and be used. By everyone. I’m not too happy about eight Jonah Magnuses, either.”

“Maybe we can put them all in a room, and they’ll eat each other,” I muttered.

“I’m pretty sure with that many of them together, they would just rule the world.”

“Or wreck it.” I leaned in. “I suppose it might not be like that. Are different versions of people different here?

“Wildly. We saw the Evans earlier, remember? One’s full Lonely; the other went Desolation.”

“Damn,” I said, trying to picture it.

“They get along like siblings—because they just do—but they are very different people.”

I made a face like tasting something awful. “I suppose I’ll at least look at him. Jonah.”

“You don’t have to. He’s not your responsibility.”

“I know him better than anyone here. I do have to, Martin.”

And Jared pulled up. I hadn’t even noticed Martin messaging him. “Right,” Jared said, rising impossibly huge from his vehicle like all the passengers of a clown car in one, and opening the back door for us.  He eyed Martin. “This’s what you wanted, eh? No wonder I weren’t your type.” And he laughed wetly.

Martin shrugged. “Always was. Not your fault.”

“Eh,” said Jared. “Killed him anyway, my time. Don’t feel like I owe nothing bad now.”

“How did you…” I said.

“Got these letters, yeah? An’ your picture. Told me where you’d be. Got into the Institute and there you were—but not for long.”

“Jonah Magnus again,” I murmured to Marrin.

“Coincidence.”

I was beginning to wonder. “I need to talk to Jane.”

“Sure? Let’s do lunch at home, first.”

“Do… do I have food?” I said, eyes wide.

Martin laughed. “I do. It’s time you came to my flat, anyway.”

“You gonna get in or not?” Jared said.

We got in.

I kept Martin’s hand between mine. “Thank you for being there.”

He just held me.

We were silent the rest of the ride back. And nothing was stopping us. Nothing was caging us in, or chaining us down. I still felt increasingly trapped, and I had no idea what to do.

The Eye tried to tell me about Jared’s secret love affair with some Corruption avatar, but I didn’t let that get too far.

Its delight unnerved me. It had changed. 

And I was beginning to wonder if I was the reason it had. 

[she-karev]

Out of Nowhere

Age Rating: 12+

Chapter: Four of Six

Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy

AN: Here’s the fourth chapter you guys and I always appreciate a like and reblog.

Summary: Amber helps Jo confront Paul Stadler and get a divorce.

Words: 2189

I hold Jo’s hand and gently guide her out of the gallery room after the surgery ended. I wanted to get her out during but she insisted on staying and listening to him tell lie after lie about her. If I wasn’t so concerned about her safety, I would’ve pressed the call button and yell at the son of a bitch for what he did to her. But if I did that, I would give her away and the bastard would know even after she left he’s still haunting her.

Jo is pale as a ghost and I can tell from her red-rimmed eyes that she was crying but I don’t point it out. A part of me wonders if this is what my mom looked like when my so-called father hit her. I am grateful that I wasn’t a witness to it but pity Alex and Aaron who were. Growing up they told me that Jimmy beat Helen so bad that she had 12 ER visits during their 18-year marriage.

And the only reason she escaped was because Alex gave Jimmy the beating of his life and he left not long after. It took having her son beat her husband for her to escape that hell, it wasn’t her decision it was Alex’s. I always wondered if she stayed because she was too in love with him or too sick to make a sane and safe decision. I always feared that I would end up like her not just because of her illness but because she stayed with someone who hurt her. I think my brother, Aaron, feared that too because any guy I would bring home or go on a date with he would interrogate them and scare them away. For the first time I’m actually grateful to have overprotective brothers like that because it probably saved me from being in Jo’s situation.

“It’s not true.” My thought train stops as Jo speaks for the first time since we left the gallery and I look at her confused, “It’s not true. Some of it is but he takes what’s true and twists it to make himself the good guy and me the psycho. It’s not true.”

My heart breaks for her as I see her struggling to reign her emotions, “I know, I know what’s the truth Jo.” I grip her hand tighter to affirm my belief in her, “I’ve grown up with men like Stadler, I know an abusive POS when I see one, trust me.” We continue to walk down the hall until we stop in front of Alex and Meredith who are conversing.

“Are you two, okay?” Alex asks immediately after seeing us.

“We’re fine. We just got out to the gallery; we were coming to find you.” Jo lets go of my hand, “Don’t worry I didn’t let him know we were there.”

“It’s not true.” Jo repeats this time to Alex and Grey who look at her in sympathy, “It’s not true. He takes the truth but he-he twists it and changes it to fit his own story. It’s not-it’s not true.”

Alex and I exchange a sympathetic look as Grey approaches Jo and holds her shoulders, “You are Jo Wilson. I know exactly who you are.” Grey tells her with simplicity and I nod in agreement. I don’t know Jo that well but I know her better than some guy who gives off serial killer vibes. Meredith hugs Jo who cries on her shoulder and all I can do is look as she breaks down over her past coming to her doorstep.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I sit in the gallery next to Alex, he and I along with Grey console Jo who is still shaken. Alex explains that Paul got in yesterday at the same time I was followed by a stranger concluding that he was the one who was in the car. Looking at the fact’s it makes sense why he would do it. I’m the sister of the man who slept with his wife while she was still legally married to him. It can make your garden variety psychopath snap and go after their enemies loved ones, especially ones who are no physical match for them.

The thought makes my skin crawl but I remind myself that Jo needs help more. I texted Andrew to meet us in the gallery so he can be in the loop. I promised him I would call if I needed help and finding out who my stalker is and just how deep this goes qualifies. If it was a random guy, I wouldn’t be so scared but to find out it was a revolutionary surgeon who has so many connections and so much wealth makes it so much worse.

Andrew enters the gallery with a thin layer of sweat on his skin, “Hey, are you okay?”

I chuckle darkly, “Not in the least. I know who he is. My stalker I know who it is.”

“He came to you?” Andrew asks concerned.

“No he…he’s Paul Stadler.” Andrew’s eyes shot up recognizing the name, “It’s Jo’s ex-husband.”

Andrew takes a moment to process before speaking, “You mean the ex who-”

“Yeah.” Jo answers numbly, “He got here yesterday and I saw him an hour ago. It would be a major coincidence if a rick stalker got in a black lexus around the same time my violent ex-husband shows up in town.”

“It isn’t.” Alex retorts venomously and I realize he must have talked to him, “I talked to him and he mentioned me having a sister.”

Andrew takes a seat next to me and gently touches my shoulder, “Did he talk to you? Did he hurt you?”

“No, I didn’t see him, I just saw him perform surgery up here with Jo and…this guy is seriously demented.”

“He is.” Jo agrees and has a look of concern and turns to Alex, “How’s Frankie?”

“He’s okay.” Alex says, “We were able to stop the bleeding from his AVM in time.”

“…I’m so sorry Amber.” I shake my head at Jo’s apology but she continues, “This is my mess I never wanted him to hurt anyone else especially you. I should’ve never sent those papers in the first place.”

I don’t get mad instead I see this from a logical standpoint and try to comfort Jo, “If it’s any consolation he would’ve found you some other way and I would’ve been in this mess in that scenario.”

“Why the hell is he after Amber?” Andrew asks frustrated.

“Um let me think, my brother slept with his wife while she was still technically married to him, he’s a controlling and jealous sociopath who likes to hit women and I am a 130-pound woman with genetic ties to a man he hates but can’t beat up.” Alex inhales sharply clearly frustrated for me as well, “I think that about covers why he’s looking to kill me.”

“We’re not gonna let him do that.” Alex says with finality, “To either of you.”

“Same.” Andrew says with seriousness as well.

Meredith speaks up, “How do you two want to handle this?” They look at me and Jo waiting for us to answer and Jo speaks first.

“I want to be divorced. I want to never see his face ever again.” I nod in agreement, it’s not much but it might get him away from here and away from all of us.

Alex interjects, “I’m coming with you for that.”

“No you are not going anywhere near him.” Meredith says sternly. Normally I would want him in the room but knowing how he reacted when he thought Andrew hurt Jo, I think it’s best if he leaves him alone.

“I should’ve killed him when I had the chance.”

“For once you and I are in agreement.” Andrew chips in and I glare at him but he doesn’t back down, “It says something if I want him to beat the guy up.”

“Which is exactly why.” Meredith says, “Alex we have got this. She is not going to be alone with him.”

“She’s not.” I say, “I’m gonna be in that room with her.”

“No.” Alex and Andrew say in unison and I look at both of them in annoyance.

“I’m not some kid you need to protect and unlike you.” I look at Alex, “I don’t have a record that goes beyond juvie so I’ll do less time if he tries anything to her.”

“I don’t like this, Amber.” Andrew says in worry, “He almost killed Jo and you-”

“Grew up wrestling two brothers, took boxing for six years and have an incredibly high pain threshold.” Andrew quiets as I rehash my violent past, “Believe me when I say it’s him you should be worried about making out of this meeting alive. I’m gonna help Jo get this bastard out of our lives even if I have to break his fingers to get him to hold the pen.” Andrew and Alex look at each other in worry.

“She’s gonna do this whether we agree with it or not is she?” Andrew asks Alex plainly.

Alex nods annoyed, “I blame myself for her being so damn stubborn.”

“At least you two know when to back out of a losing fight.” I hold Jo’s hand, “Let’s get you that divorce.”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I pace the floor anxiously along with Meredith while Jo sits at the conference table. She sent a nurse to tell Paul to meet us at the conference room on three so they can sign the divorce papers. Alex is back in the peds floor checking on Frankie and Andrew is back at the pit despite insisting he be in the room too. From what I saw in his reactions to the cops I can tell him being in the room with the man who harassed me would end badly for all of us.

A knock on the door causes me to inhale sharply and stand by Jo to protect her. Meredith opens the door and my blood boils as soon as I see Paul Stadler on the other side of the door. At first glance you wouldn’t think him the type to hit his wife and stalk a young woman. But that’s how they fool you I guess; they act the part and people follow.

“You have the divorce papers?” Meredith asks.

Paul holds the folder up indicating the papers are in it, “If you wouldn’t mind Dr. Grey, I’d like to have a moment alone with-”

“Actually I do mind. I’m gonna stay here.” Meredith sits next to Jo and I keep standing by her right side ready to pounce if he so much as lays a hand on her.

“Okay then.” He moves to the other side of the table and looks at me like he doesn’t recognize me, “I-I’m sorry who are you?”

“…You know exactly who I am.” I hiss out, “And if I were I’d sign that line at the bottom and get the hell out before two real men come in here at my beck and call if you stay for a second longer than you need to.”

I can tell I hit a nerve because a vein pops in his forehead but he inhales to control himself. It pleases me that I’m aggravating him, “Let’s get this done, shall we?”

I pull out my pen and slide it across the table for him to catch. He clicks it and before signing he looks at Jo who avoids eye contact. I continued to stare daggers at him silently ordering him to keep his eyes off her. He does so and signs his name before handing her the folder and pen. She quickly grabs both and signs her name as fast as she can before closing the folder. Paul tries to grab it but Dr. Grey takes it.

“We’ve got it, it’s faster this way.” She leads Paul to the door and I clasp Jo’s shoulder in support.

“It’s over.” I whisper to her but Paul turns and speaks to her to my anger.

“I’m really happy for you Jo.” I scowl at him again to get him to leave but he doesn’t he keeps spouting lies, “I hope this brings you…some real peace. You deserve it, we both do.” I swallow the bile in my throat at his words and keep quiet but Jo doesn’t.

“You don’t deserve anything good.” Paul is clearly triggered as he stops at the doorway, “You’re a monster.” Jo says with ease and Paul finally walks away and closes the door. I exhale letting my steam out and my angry face show while Meredith sits back down with Jo.

“I swear I was this close to taking my pen and jabbing it in his eye.” I admit in a gruff voice.

“You both did great and it’s over.” I nod at Meredith’s words but Jo is looking at Paul through the window and notices something that sets her off.

“No. No it’s not. I need Robbins. Where’s Robbins?”

My anger turns to confusion as me and Meredith look at Jo confused over her words.

[flamechasr]

i want to know every single thing in the world i swear

okay. bladie info dump because i am thinking of him and i wanna yap rn (tw suicide and self harm because of how he is.)

he suffers from ptsd, chronic pain, and psychosis: mara fucked him up both mentally and physically as he is often constantly in pain, and it is worsened by the ptsd as symptoms of mara flare up when he remembers too much of his past. besides the fictional illness though it's also the wounds that couldn't be healed, as he does have a past where jingliu stabbed and killed him 1000 times over in a torture-brainwashing method until he was so fucked up that he just can't think about anything anymore besides his revenge and the pain and rage he feels, specifically for the three that needs to pay the price ( dan feng, jingliu, and himself ). and speaking of the reason confuses dan heng for dan feng is because he quite literally can't make the distinction between them. due to the hallucinations. jingliu made him believe that dan feng is responsible for his pain and, faced with his reincarnation, he only sees him as the person he once loved but brought him all this suffering. his mara flares up just by seeing dan heng and there's never really a moment he can even think about him without him hurting and going literally crazy.

his relationship with death: he grew up very close to death, with how his homeland was destroyed and his parents and everyone there was killed, only to then live among immortals as the only mortal. he was very aware of his own mortality and embraced it, yet, faced with death, he feared it too. when he was given the curse of immortality, jingliu tortured him by killing him over and over until his mind was literally broken. on one hand, death is his final escape from the never-ending torture of mara and the pain and the Visions, and yet death is now the furthest thing away from him, a paradise he can't reach, and his only motive to stay alive right now is the revenge he seeks. what's more, even temporary death is a comfort to him. it numbs him, removes him from his pain. kafka killed him and he is so attached to her, he asks jingliu to kill him one last time in her story quest, and she did so as a mercy instead of as torture this time because he's reached the point where that brief moment and feeling of death was almost like a high for him, catharsis.

his relationship with himself: among the long-lived species, yingxing grew up to be very arrogant in spite of his mortality. it's true that he was a talented and famed craftsman at his time, and he prided himself to be basically better than all the immortals despite having such a short life. he even swore that he would never give up his mortality, it was all of this that gave him the sense of individuality, and yet tragedy happened where he was reborn as an empty husk, infected with life. his eyes burned red, his hair regained vitality, his body will forever be intact despite the damage it suffers. he walked through life aimlessly, destroying civilizations in his wake because he has no purpose, he can't craft anything anymore, he can't think anymore, everything that made him feel alive was ripped from him and yet he can't just choose to die. more than that, he is incredibly dependent on kafka to keep him sane as her spirit whisper temporarily suppresses the mara. something something consensual mind control. she tells him not to think about anything and he doesn't. it's the one kindness that the universe gives him, and yet he will never have "himself" back. he's going to live like this forever until he meets his ultimate end.

his relationship with the stellaron hunters: he looks after silver wolf as seen in the lightcone 'before the tutorial mission starts' ( one of my favs ever ). he is also considerably gentle and indulgent with her, letting her use his phone to game and promising her that he would game with her one day although he doesn't know when. he is noted to get along with elio, it's not explained why but i believe it has to do with his own dependency on elio's promise that he will give him a proper burial when he dies permanently. he is very attached to kafka in several ways. he is often exasperated of her and is prone to chiding her due to her nonchalant fearless behavior, but his character story made it a point that he understands kafka ( no one understands her ), he lets her call him 'bladie' ( he threatened the traiblazer when they did that ), he allows himself to be vulnerable with her ( seeks her when he is in pain ), he goes out of his way to look for and protect her, and he is never under her control in those moments - kafka never makes him do anything for her, it's of his own volition that he does things for her, if only to save her from her own recklessness. he fears her mortality as she puts herself in dangerous situations for fun and he wouldn't fare quite as well without her.

his signature lightcone 'the unreachable side' features the story of how he would go to a certain place with the swords of his victims and wonders when someone would bring his sword here, and it's actually the same place as seen in the trailer 'nightmare' where there was his sword, dan heng's spear, and jing yuan's glaive put together. likely foreshadowing an "end" that they will all meet together.

speaking of his sword, it is called the shard sword and it used to belong to jingliu. yingxing specifically made it for her and it ended up in his hands after the whole torture-brainwashing when the sword shattered and jingliu would from then on use a sword made of pure ice, meanwhile blade picked up the sword he created and made it his own, broken like himself.

one of his idles is him hugging the sword and i just think it is so cute that he finds it comforting, as there is also a chibi art where he's sleeping while hugging it and silver wolf and kafka mess with him.

if you look closely his technique is literally him cutting himself to use his blood as sword fodder which is why he loses hp. the sound effect is really eugh to me. least to say i don't use it a lot.

the chinese instrument suona is featured in his trailer, which is commonly used in funeral processions. it's the screeching kinda sound at 1:16. his talent name 'shuhu's gift' references how he got his self-healing ability from consuming the flesh of shuhu, though to him it's more of a curse than a gift.

[smallpawedbear]

Smallpawedbear ⭐️ Rules and MasterList! ✨

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Hi! I’m smallpawedbear an anonymous aspiring author, film maker, musician, and artist! (i promise i’m totally sane whole going to school for all the above) Here on tumblr i want to share many of these arts and practice them with you guys via requests, currently I’m only doing fanfic requests but i might open up to more of my arts soon.

I’m just starting writing fanfics specifically so bear with me!

-🪐🌙⭐️

Fandoms i will write for:

Pokémon games and shows sun and moon - current, Genshin Impact, demon slayer, Harry Potter

If a fandom you want to request isn’t on there you can still try your luck as i look at all requests, you will just be more likely to get yours written with these fandoms.

I write for any characters!

Rules:

Be polite! I will NOT take requests that are demanding or rude!

Be Patient, it’s okay to submit a request twice but do NOT spam me with requests please!

Please be reasonable and follow my boundaries, i will only write what i am comfortable with

Do NOT be hateful or rude towards me or anyone else in any way!

Fanfic Can and Wonts:

Can:

Romantic, platonic, suggestive, gender neutral, male reader, female reader, SOME canon x canon, SOME oc x canon

I also write things like short stories for books you finish when you want more to read, or stand alone stories of characters that don’t include a reader.

General fanfics with non specific characters.

I also write non fandom specific stories, if you just wanted to share an idea as a request!

Wont:

NSFW, offensive themes, oc x oc, minor x adult, real people (celebrities, etc), poly relationships (i’m not great at the dynamic), gore, glorified mental illness, self harm, and form of extreme violence, pregnancy, cheating

If i don’t respond to or write your request after a week of sending then it’s either denied or i am not currently accepting requests.

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Master List 🌙

Pokémon:

Arven:

[nicegaai]

Are you ever gonna finish Þetta Reddast? I loved that story, but NO PRESSURE OKAY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH BYE

short answer YES I AM. SORRY FOR THE WAIT

long answer. i got medicated over the summer and it made me too sane to write incestfanfiction. HOWVWER im off my meds again andbback in the google document incest mines. i ws literally working on it like 2 days ago. i promise

kisses ur face anon u r so sweet 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖 ill gladly infodump thw entire unwrittwn part of the plot and answer any lore / inner monologue / etc questions u have if u ask nicely 🥺 ..... im obsessed with my own au like u wouldn't believe. teehee

[cheemken]

Knight you got me feeling

After reading bout the Unova kids. Like.. they’re each other’s friends. Each other’s family. But even if she never voiced it, Iris always felt a small bit of resentment towards the Twins because people always gave the credit to them. Even though she gave everything to protect Unova from harm, she was outshined by the two Hero’s. Even though she was a Hero herself

But goddd Bianca liking both Iris and Hilda. And these two being respectful of each other and agreeing to let Bianca decide. But now Iris is reminded of all the little things Hilda had stolen from her. The fame, the credit, the title, the respect. And now she’s trying to steal Bianca from her, just like she had with everything else. But she’s not going to let Hilda get away with stealing from her ever again. She’s been passive about it for to long

(But ough, I am being sane about this. Like Iris had been relatively okay with Hilda and Hilbert taking the credit from her because she knew they didn’t mean to. The public just liked them better then her. But now that she’s losing it she’s taking her anger out on everyone about anything, including her friends)

GOD RIGHT CBXMCBMDNFMDBD

Your honour everytime I make a concept abt them I have to be my own goddamn therapist they make me so fucking ill😭😭

Like yeah Iris really hated the fact that the public liked the twins better than her, but they're her friends yknow, they were so supportive of her, they were nice to her and told her how strong she was, that out of all of em, they always felt safe w her bc she's strong and capable yknow, that they could really trust her. But shit they didn't really do much abt all the comments Iris gets. Like they'd tell her to just not listen to them yknow, that those comments aren't worth anything, the people of Unova were just being very bitter. But it's also the fact that they say that while bending over backwards trying to please the Unovan people too. That they never got any hate from them, that even N, who was formerly Plasma's king, was better off than her and it's so fucking unfair man.

What was it abt her that was so easy to hate? She kept repeating that question over and over and over again until she cries herself to sleep. She asked Drayden abt it, he pulled her in for a hug, telling her to not mind those comments. Told her the same thing her friends said. If anything he'll make sure that the people of Opelucid doesn't see her as weak, they should know better. But that didn't change anything, fake smiles and promises managed to fool Drayden, and still she suffered.

Then a tournament at Kalos, all the Champions are there, she still hears those whispers, how they doubt she could even get past the first round. It messes her up ofc, she told Diantha and Lance abt it. They were not happy, not one bit, and they actually did something. They went and confronted the people who looked down on her, told them off, told them how Iris was stronger than she seemed. And that actually shut them up, when Iris got to the semi finals they cheered for her, even if she lost to Lance. They became her fans, supporting her too. And that really made her happy.

So why can't her friends do that too? Did they secretly hate her? Years later she really believed that, that maybe they liked being in the limelight, that they liked the praise being said to them, that the people of Unova hold them is such high regards. She hears how Hilbert should've won against Iris, she hears how Hilda was such a hero helping around Unova. She hears how the twins were just so perfect, how they're doing a much better job than Iris, but she was doing the same as them tenfold. She's already struggling as it is, yet even w that the people of Unova just didn't like her and she doesn't understand why. She ended up hating her friends bc of that

But now she has smth yknow. She has Diantha and Lance as her parents, and they actually do smth to stop the hate. She has Kyurem, her very own legendary dragon who trusts her so much, who was so lonely before he met her. She has the Shadow Triad, despite it all, they grew close, somehow they confided w each other, and they grew loyal to her. She has Team Plasma, and they were so loyal to her as well, giving her the respect she deserves. She has Bianca,, well, had. Ofc, the person Iris wanted to be in her life still, the person who she wanted to share her future w, Hilda took her away.

Was she not satisfied with everything else she took? She had to take Bianca away from her despite Bianca telling Iris that she loves her. Hilda is so fucking unfair. For Iris, it felt like one final fuck you before she takes everything else that she finally has in her life away from her too.

[christelgothamite]

{one-shot}

Christeline Judith

One of the peaks of having teleportation was that she can enter her hometown without anyone noticing and leave it quickly too.

This was the case. When she entered her fathers room without notifying any of her family members.

"dad?" she called out, setting besides his bed where the man laid. He slowly opened his eyes and smiled "Christeline.. It's been a while"

His eyes spoke for him. He was weak and tired of everything. Christel didn't need her new powers to realise his days no minutes were numbered

Christel bite her lips. She had never truly been close to her father due to his illness.. But she did know that he was indeed a good man and someone who truly loves her. In fact the only person sane in this family.

"Dad I am sorry but you are going to-" Christel was cut of by him "die." the man chuckled "already know that. let me guess... Hades powers finally blossomed into you?" the man asked. His eyes were soft but were filled with bittersweet remorse as Christel nodded a yes.

"I am sorry I was never able to tell you about him. And how he also shared your blood." he said feeling guilty. Christel shook her head "it's okay dad. I understand. Even if we share blood. you are still my father."

"thank you.." his eyes looked at peace. "I have made a decision.. Actually. Concerning you and Anasticius" he stated. Trying to reach Christel's hand but failing to because of the weakness. Christel quickly took his hand. "yes dad?" she asked.

"I have made some preparations. To cut both of you out of the family"

Christel's eyes widened "huh? "

He nodded "yes.. To make sure you two don't fall like we did. I couldn't save myself. But I will save you two" he mumbled. "I have make a bunch of documents that states and removes both of you from the Lavo branch."

"it will remove you from your responsiblilies as the second heir and convert Stella as the second heir instead... Few days ago Anasticius's training began" he informed. Christel flinched. Ah yes. Her nephews training. "it will put a stop to that and you will take his custody fully" he continued further.

"things went better than I expected when I made the documents and all you have to do it sign the contract inside the penioccio book" Christel blinked and walked towards his drawer that had a the book turning a few pages. She saw the contract.

Her father smiled. "so please take this and live your lives freely as Christeline Judith and Anasticius Judith"

Christel gave a smile smile. Biting her lips as she realised what would happen next. She gripped the book close to Her chest.

"I will take care of the rest. Sleep well dad...."

Her father took his last breath with that promise.

She teleported into her Gotham apartment.

[marley-manson]

[coffee cup] BJ/Peggy/Hawkeye OT3 is better than BJ getting divorced and leaving his established family (sorry this came off as confrontational somehow omg oops, I promise I'm just curious about your thoughts :3)

Thank you! And no worries lol it doesn't sound that confrontational to me.

That's a big disagree from me. Cut to spare any followers I have who are into it.

Like I'm not into ot3s in general in fiction, it's just something I'm incapable of getting invested in. The only ot3s I've ever been interested in have been extremely ill-judged ones that inevitably crash and burn due to tension and jealousy and weirdness lol. This isn't a reflection on how I feel about polyamory irl of course, but it's not my bag in terms of fictional romance.

Secondly when it comes to these people in particular, I find it impossible to suspend my disbelief. I can't imagine BJ being mature enough and secure enough to let Hawkeye fuck his wife or let Peggy fuck his boyfriend lol. I can imagine him saying he's okay with it and trying to make it work for about a week before driving himself around the bend, but I can't imagine him being chill about it. Hawkeye would be fine, I have 0 problem imagining him in an open relationship or with multiple people, Peggy is non-existent as a character so she's whatever the writer needs her to be to suit the fic, but BJ is the weak link who would send it crashing down.

Thirdly I don't have any emotional investment in BJ's marriage, I don't particularly care about Peg because she isn't an actual character and I have no imagination so I can't emotionally invest in a non-entity, and I think it would be very fitting for BJ's narrative if his marriage crashed and burned when he got back to Mill Valley.

The way he's - textually - most invested in it as a coping mechanism, as per War Co-Respondent, says it all to me, and completely tracks with how that marriage is portrayed throughout the show, imo. He cheats on her in season 5 and tells Aggie that he'd cheat on her again if he didn't need that vision of future with his family to cling to to keep him sane. He's paranoid about Peggy cheating in multiple episodes, he's scared of her having changed when he gets back home (Mail Call 3 iirc), he's scared of her not needing him, he's scared of being replaceable... what he's really scared of is losing his own image of himself as Wholesome Family Man, moreso than anything to do with this specific interpersonal relationship, imo.

I'm not saying he canonically doesn't love her, but I am saying that thematically it's not the most important aspect of their marriage, BJ's self-image is. And that really lends itself to darker takes on their marriage, and/or interpreting BJ as gay and repressed. Which is great for me, because I don't care about hetero relationships in my media, but I do care about interesting character writing, and this is that.

I don't think it's the only fitting culmination of BJ's narrative, but I do think that BJ and Peggy getting divorced is definitely one solid potential ending to it that fits the themes nicely, and it's much, much easier for me to imagine than BJ engaging in a triad relationship or otherwise opening up his marriage.

I also think that there's a solid Peggy vs Hawkeye thread you can trace through the show, and when it comes to narratives where two potentials are pit against each other, I always favour being forced to choose one over a character having their cake and eating it too. I'm a fan of bittersweet choices, consequences, gaining one thing while losing another, sacrifices in the pursuit of happiness, etc. Not a big fan of uncomplicated fluff where everything works out perfectly.

All that said, I did mention being into doomed ot3s, and ngl I would loooove to see a take on Hawkeye/BJ/Peggy that's less of a happily ever after and more of a giant trashfire. BJ telling himself he's cool with it and being completely unable to hide his jealousy at the thought of Hawkeye and Peggy even making small talk without him there. Or BJ trying to finagle an open marriage for me but not for thee set of relationships, idk, could be fun!

BJ's got a lot of flaws, and I'm only really interested in him if we're exploring them.

send me a ☕️ and an opinion (popular or unpopular) and i’ll say whether i agree or disagree

[lubdubsworld]

Insatiable

Pairing : Jeon Jungkook x OC

Rating 18+

Genre : Vampire Au!!!! , DILF! Jungkook ! Bodyguard AU! Babysitter OC!   Age difference!!!

Chapter 1   Chapter 2  Chapter 3    Chapter 4  Chapter 5

WARNINGS : THERES JUST WAY TOO MUCH FILTH HERE !!!!!!!!

A huge thank you for the banner  to @helenazbmrskai​

Chapter 6

“You sure you don’t want to take that?” Yugyeom gave me a look as i rejected the call for the umpteenth time.

“Oh..uh... Yeah.” I shrugged it off feeling exhausted. 

The whole point of going out with Yugyeom was to take a break from one Jeon Jungkook but that was impossible..... with said vampire calling me every five minutes. 

“So...anyways.... Mingyu was way out of line and I really wanted to apologize on behalf of the idiot. Although your bodyguard seems to have put the fear of God into him....Kid was trembling when he came home last night. “ Yugyeom chuckled. 

I smiled weakly.

“Yeah...he tends to do that.” I said hoarsely. 

Jungkook was the one topic I was hoping to avoid. Because having sex with him hadn’t scratched the itch the way I had thought it would.... It had merely amped my lust by a few hundred thousand times and I was ill equipped to handle it. I didn’t know what to do with myself around him and I was so fucking terrified I was going to do something awful;.

Like jump him in front of everyone. 

So I’d spent the whole day trying to be aloof but it hadn’t worked very well. 

Jungkook stuck close me , tossing lingering glances that made my skin heat up, , hands brushing mine way too often, eyes trained on me without any restraint 

And don’t even get me started on the  touching.

Hand brushing my waist when we turned a corner , fingers brushing my hair off my face when I had my hands full with the kids, an arm wrapped around my shoulder when Minhyuk had asked me out again. 

And I’m not saying i didn’t love it because it felt like Christmas and my birthday had come together but.... but... I had a job to do. With  kids.

It wasn’t the place to be fantasizing about how good your bodyguard’s cock had felt inside you. 

“Jungkook right? Jeon Jungkook ....” Yugyeom said thoughtfully. 

“Uh ...yeah...”

“Tall dude? Black hair? Looks way too intimidating and dresses like he’s just stepped off a runway?” Yugyeom prompted and I blinked.

“You know him?” I asked surprised. 

Yugyeom shook his head.

“No, but I think he’s over by the bar and he’s looking at me like he wants to tear out my jugular.” He said casually. 

My gaze snapped to the bar behind us and I felt my eyes widen in disbelief. 

Jungkook stood leaning against the bar, eyes narrowed dangerously and I groaned. 

So much for avoiding him. 

“He looks pissed.” Yugyeom commented.

“I kinda ditched him.” I muttered.

“did you tell him , I’m a friend?”

“Don’t think it would have made much difference.  Gimme a minute?” I whispered, and Yugyeom laughed, waving me off. 

I stood up slowly , bracing myself for the interrogation I knew was coming,  before turning around and walking over to him. 

Jungkook’s eyes stayed trained on me as I made my way over and I felt my throat go dry at the sight of him. He hadn’t dressed for the place today, a black turtleneck and a black jacket and black slacks with a silver belt buckle. Hair tousled all over his forehead as he stared, unsmiling. 

“Is this whole angel of death thing really necessary?” I whispered as soon as I reached him.” I’m sorry. I just needed to ...” stay away from you for a bit and last night was so amazing and i can’t stop thinking about it. 

“ You couldn’t take a few minutes to tell me where you were going?” He asked casually and I swallowed. 

“Jungkook, Yugyeom’s ...a good friend.” I muttered.

“How about you let me make that call?” He said coldly, eyes narrowed in annoyance and I felt chilled.

“I’m sorry... To be honest, I missed you. I’ve gotten used to you being around and I was going to cut the night short. I promise.” 

He scoffed. 

‘Really? I don’t believe you. For someone who spent the better part of a month begging for my cock, the novelty seems to have worn off pretty fast for you.” He said casually. 

My head snapped up , the words stunning me into silence. 

I could only gape at him. 

He gave me another lazy once over.

“And it made me wonder.....did I not  fuck  her good enough?”  

Oh, Christ. 

I felt my face turn a flame red , my fingers going clammy. 

“Jungkook, stop.” I whispered , glancing back at Yugyeom quickly. He was fiddling with his phone, 

“What’s wrong? You need to head back? YOur boyfriend’s gonna be upset?” 

I frowned. 

“He’s not my boyfriend.” I muttered. 

Jungkook grinned. 

“Right...he’s just the clown you wanted to suck off when you were younger...” 

“God, what’s gotten into you?” I groaned. 

Jungkook shrugged.

“I don’t like being ignored. It’s a character flaw of mine.” 

I gaped at him.

“I am not ignoring you.... I... I was out with a friend....It’s been less than an hour since I saw you... I literally spent the whole day with you.” I said shrilly. 

“Really? Then why’d you not pick up when I called....?” He waved his phone and I flushed, looking away. 

“Because I wanted an hour with an old friend....Without anyone interrupting.” I lied.  

Because you’re driving me in sane and I need an hour without you around so I can get my friggin body under control before I get arrested for public indecency. 

He clenched his jaw. 

“I see. “ He reached for a glass of wine on the countertop in front of him and turned around. “ Here” He held it out for me.

I took the drink, suspicious. 

“Go on , then.... I won’t interrupt...” He shrugged. 

I nodded, relieved.

Turning around I made to move away.

“Thought you’d be interested in a little gift I got you.... but if you’d rather spend time with the clown... I get that.” 

His voice was low and deep, a drawl that made the hair on my skin stand on end. 

I turned back to him, eyes narrowed. 

“What gift?” I demanded. 

He shrugged. 

“Nevermind.”

I felt my hackles rise. 

“Jungkook...”

“Are you sure.. what if that clown misunderstands... ...” he pointed a finger at my table and I glared at him. 

“Stop calling him that , God..his name is yugyeom. “ I snapped.

Jungkook’s smile was positively feral.

“Don’t know .Don’t care. So, you want it? You sure ?” He asked casually. 

i nodded, holding my hand out.

“Gimme .” I said quickly. 

He shook his head. 

“Can’t give it to your here,  angel.” 

I frowned , drawing my hand back.  

“There’s a ladies room on the fifteenth floor. It’s being renovated ... no one goes there... Meet me there in five?” 

I stared at him.

“There’s a firework show in half an hour. I don’t wanna miss it.” I protested. 

Jungkook gave me a thoughtful smile.

“You wanna watch the fireworks?”

I nodded. “ Yugyeom booked it for me. I wanna see it.” 

“Alright.. I’ll get you back in time for the fireworks.” He nodded, face frustratingly neutral. 

“Okay..then .. and I’ll meet you there.” 

“Can’t wait ...” He murmured softly. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~

The restroom on the fifteenth floor was deserted like he said and looked less like the ladies room and more like a luxurious parlor. The stalls were further in and the waiting space had beautifully upholstered couches and armchairs. Ornate mirrors hung on all the walls and I found Jungkook seated on one the couches, legs spread wide as he casually browsed his phone. 

I stepped in carefully , shutting the door behind me. 

Jungkook looked up at me, smiling. 

“Lock the door.” He said casually and I hesitated.

“Jungkook, we shouldn’t be-”

“If you need to be at the firework show , you need to stop wasting time baby...” He said firmly. 

I locked the door quickly, making sure it couldn’t be opened. 

I turned back around and jumped when I ran right into Jungkook, who had crept up on me. 

He smiled at me. 

“Hi.” He said gently. 

I felt myself melt . 

“Hi.” I laughed.

“Don’t like it when you ignore me.” He muttered. bending low and nipping my jaw. 

I grabbed his shoulders, knees weak. 

“Uh... is this the gift...?” I gasped when he bit down hard, teeth sharp on the skin and he licked the little abrasion, wet and warm. 

“Not really but I’ll get to it. Before that, “ He pulled away, “ I just realized I never got to eat you out yesterday.” 

The gears in my head stopped spinning. 

I could only stare at him, stunned/ 

“But, I like to be thorough and we don’t have that kind of time right now. So I’m just gonna ask you this.....Do  You regret last night?”

I blinked. 

What even...? I couldn’t keep track of his thought process. 

“No.. no of course not...” I said harshly.

“You wanna keep doing this?” He tilted his head, eyes boring into mine. 

 Only for the rest of my life. 

“Yes!!” I said angrily and he chuckled. 

“Okay...but angel, I don’t like it when you run around doing as you please without letting me know what you’re up to. What you did today...” He shook his head. “ That doesn’t work for me.”

I flushed.

“I said I’m sorry.” I muttered. 

“But are you?” He said thoughtfully. 

“what..What does that mean...?”

“Apologies don’t mean shit if you don’t back them up with actions. I’m just saying... you ready to back up your words by doing as I say?” his eyes flashed red. 

I hesitated. 

“What do you want me to do. ?”

“Just don’t ignore me.” He shrugged.

“Okay...” i agreed at once.

“ You can do that?” He asked with a frown.

“Uh...sure. “ 

He hummed. 

“I’m not so sure... I think you need a little help with that.” 

“Jungkook , what are you even -”

“Go lie down on the couch for me. “

I stared at him. 

“Hurry up baby, your boyfriend’s waiting upstairs remember? .”  He grinned. 

“Please stop calling him that...” I whined, moving to the wide couch in the corner and lying down after toeing off my shoes.

. Jungkook grabbed an armchair, dragging it close to the couch. He sat down , close enough to touch and I swallowed.  

Jungkook shrugged out of his jacket, tossing it on the arm of the couch , near my feet. 

He spread his legs and my eyes nearly popped out of my head when he began unbuckling his belt, dragging the leather out through the hoops before fiddling with the buttons on his fly. 

“I was thinking of last night. Was your first time right angel?” He asked casually and I stared as I watched his hands. Long nimble fingers gripping the zipper of his slacks and yanking the metal down , revealing black briefs. 

“Uh... I.. yes?” I felt my thighs clench in arousal, toes curling into the fabric of the couch.

 “  I’ve been around enough women to know that I’m bigger than average. “ He sank his fingers into his briefs, hands curling around the hardened length of his arousal and I flushed when he pulled his cock out, hard and thick. 

“Jungkook!” I whimpered, moving to scramble to my feet but he pressed a hand to my shoulder, pushing me back down.

“ Stay there angel.... Let me finish” He said sternly. 

I pouted, not entirely sure if I liked this Jungkook. Where was the sweet man who wanted to let me call the shots? 

 “ This is what I’m like. “ Jungkook said , grinning as though he could read my mind “ Just because I indulged you last night, doesn’t mean I’m gonna let you walk all over me ....Running off without telling me where you went? That’s not gonna happen again angel and I’m gonna make sure of it. ” He reached out and gently gripped my chin before squeezing down enough to make me wince. 

I glared at him before my eyes slipped back to his cock and my mouth watered. It looked so good, thick and hard and he was close enough for me to see the precum beading up at the slit. I wondered what it would taste like. How it would feel,

“Can I suck you off?” I asked softly, batting my lashes. 

He gave me an amused look.

“No. You can’t.  Anyways... Like I was saying , I know you said you were a virgin but then, you also took my fat cock like you’d been doing it all your life. “ He frowned. 

Blood rushed to my face in embarrassment. 

“That’s... you...” I spluttered. 

“And that’s when I realized... Just because you’re a virgin, doesn’t mean you haven’t fucked yourself. “ He grinned devilishly. 

I buried my face in my hands.

“Oh god...” I choked.

“Guess what I found in your room...” 

My eyes snapped up to him and he was rummaging in his jacket pocket. 

I shrieked when I saw a very familiar vibrator , a pale mauve in color. It wasn’t very long but it was really thick, only a hairsbreadth smaller than Jungkook. 

I glared at him.

“You went through my things!!” i yelled affronted. 

He rolled his eyes. 

“Hardly.  It was literally on your bed when I went looking for you in the evening because I couldn’t fucking find you.. “ He snapped. 

I shut my mouth. 

“Okay...fine ..yeah I use sex toys. Big  deal.” I muttered. 

He shook his head. 

“No it isn’t. Which is why I want you to show me. “ He leaned back, casually wrapping a hand around his cock. I stared at him as he casually began stroking the hard length of his dick, after licking his palms. 

Did he really think I was too shy to put on a show? 

Boy was he in for a surprise. 

Smiling evilly, I pulled my dress up quickly, hooking my thumbs into my panties and yanking them down quickly, kicking them off. 

I gave him a smile. 

“Can I turn around? You’ll have a better view.” I smirked. 

His eyebrows shot up.

“Go ahead, princess. Better impress me.” 

I rolled my eyes at that. 

Sitting up , I sat back down against the cushioned arm rest, keeping my eyes trained on his and I bent my knees and spread my legs, utterly shameless because well... because I had always liked the idea of being watched. 

Jungkook wasn’t shy by any standards and his gaze flitted right between my legs without any hesitation. 

“Pretty.” He murmured gently and I fought the rush of embarrassment. I’d started this and I was going to see through it. 

“What am I supposed to get turned on by?” I asked innocently running my fore and middle finger up andn down my slit gently. I was really fucking wet on the inside but he couldn’t know that.  

And just for good measure, I let my gaze drop to his cock and back up, looking bored. 

His eyes narrowed. 

“How about the way I filled your sloppy little cunt last night? Remember that?  Remember how fucking wet you got, just from me licking your nipples....?” He smiled. 

I felt my throat go dry and my pussy clenched,  damp wetness seeping out and coating my hand  and my fingers slipped right in  before I could do anything about it. 

Jungkook laughed, eyes trained where my fingers had disappeared. 

He kept his hands on his cock and leaned in closer, kissing the edge of my earlobe.

“Thought so. “ He whispered right into my ears, :” My horny little slut. Bet you walk around all day with that cunt dripping wet and ready. Bet I could fuck into you with ease, anytime I want...just flip that skirt up, push your panties aside and drive my cock into you, yeah? “ He licked a stripe up my cheeks and I shuddered,  pumping my fingers into my pussy faster, “  Virgin..???  what a fucking joke... You are the farthest thing from a virgin my sweet little whore...” 

“Jungkook...” I whimpered and he gripped my wrists, stilling my fingers and pulling them out. He pulled my hand closer, right up to his mouth and I groaned when he wrapped his lips around the wet and messy digits, licking up all the wetness there.

“Sweet and spicy , just like I thought...” He directed my fingers back down between my fingers...” Get more of that wetness for me baby...want you to jerk me off with that hot slick you have dripping between your thighs...” 

:” On your knees.” He prompted and I sank down in front of him. “Jerk me off, baby...Make me feel good...” He whispered, spreading his legs and I wrapped shaky hands around his cock. I swallowed , gazing at him , licking my lips as I stroked his dick, faster. He took one of my hands and directed them down to his balls.

“Like this... This makes me feel good..”He whispered, showing me just how he liked to be touched .I nodded, following his lead and speeding up my movements, gripping a little tighter, using my thumb to trace circles on the head, rubbing the wetness around his slit and the thick vein on the underside of his cock. 

He groaned and shuddered a little. And then he leaned forward, gripping my chin. 

“ I want you to get on my lap now.... and then I’m gonna cum inside you “

I whimpered, already scrambling to my feet but before I could get on him, he gripped my waists. 

“ Let me finish, angel.I’m gonna fill you up with my cum and then I’m gonna stick this , “ He held the vibrator up, “ inside you . If you can keep your slutty little pussy tight enough for me, keep this thing  and my cum inside you till tonight...maybe you’ll get your gift. “ 

I stared at him, my jaw coming unhinged. 

 What. 

WHAT.

He pulled me closer, maneuvering me onto his lap and I swallowed. 

“I’m not... I can’t..” I whispered.

“Sure you can.. I believe you. But if you don’t want to.” His gaze softened. “ We can forget all about it.” 

I bit my lips, staring into his gorgeous face and and really, it was a no brainer. I wasn’t going to say no to Jeon Jungkook. It was just not going to happen. 

I spread my thighs and he grabbed his cock, tracing the tip on my slit.

“Ready?” 

I nodded, sinking down on the hard length easily. My breath caught , fingers curling into his shoulders as I swallowed the whimper that threatened. God he was so fucking big inside me. So hard and real and good and I wanted to sit on his cock forever. Wanted to stay locked in a room with him forever,  just fucking and teasing and fucking again and only stopping to shower or eat. 

“Don’t cum.” He said gently.” You don’t get to cum till I tell you to. You understand baby?” 

I whimpered as he fucked into me just once or twice. Warm wetness flooded my insides and I clutched his shoulders, burying my face there as he groaned, fucking me full of his release. 

He grabbed the vibrator from the couch and I swallowed when he brought it down to my entrance.

“Ready baby? Gonna pull my cock out and put this in.....Need to you clench down on it and keep my cum in... Don’t make a mess alright?” He kissed my cheeks sweetly, the affectionate gesture a complete contrast to his filthy words. 

I did make a mess... 

A little bit and the vibrator was thick enough to stay lodged in, and I felt my eyes roll back in my head as he pushed it in fully. 

“You okay?” He whispered, kissing me softly before running his palms up and down my thighs. “Gonna help you put your panties on, baby. okay? keep your pussy clenched for me. ” 

I nodded weakly, trying to keep my muscles clamped around the hard length of the toy inside me as he helped slip my bikini briefs back up my thighs. 

“You okay?” 

I nodded.

“Good. Let’s go see those fireworks, shall we?” He grinned devilishly. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jungkook stood leaning against the wall of the rooftop restaurant , arms crossed as he watched her, a smile playing around his lips as he watched her squirm, shifting her weight from on thigh to the other as she tried to sit on the hard backed chair, her eyes glassy and unfocused as the Kim vampire talked to her. 

Dude didn’t seem to realize that she was so out of it she probably didn’t understand a word he was saying. 

He stayed in the shadows because the front of his thighs was stained with cum, a little bit of white streaks, stark against the black of his slacks. She had let a little of it spill out of her when he’d pulled out...which was a little sloppy of her and usually, Jungkook would punish something like that in a partner but...well because it was the first time he would just let it pass. Besides, he was sure she would improve with time.

He trained his eyes back to her hips and his lips quirked when gripped she armrest, shivering a bit. 

This felt better,  he thought.

Watching her with other men was easier when he knew that he was the one on her mind. Knew that all she could think about was keeping his cum inside her, the hardness of the toy a reminder that he was the one she was trying to please and impress.  

He slipped a hand inside his pocket, playing with the tiny little remote . 

Should he? 

Would it be too much? 

He smirked. 

Only one way to find out. 

He thumbed the small knob at the top of the remote, eyes trained on her .

The moment he flipped it on , at the smallest setting possible, she went completely still.

And he wondered how it felt, the electric vibrations of the toy against her insides...he wished he could see it...she her pussy spread out for him, pink and wet and swollen and wrecked.... God, the things he wanted to do to her. 

It annoyed him a bit, how shamelessly she’s spread her legs on that couch, let him see the pink of her cunt without an ounce of shame .....annoyed him because he wasn’t sure if it was for  him  or because it was what she was  like.... 

Annoyed him because if it wasn’t for just him.... would she do it for other too? 

He couldn’t stomach the idea of it. 

That pretty pink pussy, so wet and wanting...he wanted it all for himself . He wanted her legs spread out on his bed, her arms tied to the fucking bedposts so he could show her just how dangerous he could be when he wanted to....

That just because he’d let her take the lead didn’t mean he would settle for anything less than her complete submission.

Smiling, he turned the vibrations up a little bit, smirking as he watched her. 

Sera gripped the armrest gently, raising her hips off the chair a bit and turning around slowly to stare right at him.

He grinned wide, relishing the shocked desperation on her face. He pushed away from the wall, sauntering over to her slowly till he was right behind her. 

“Doing okay? baby?” He whispered gently for her ears only.

“Don’t do this to me.” She said softly, nails digging indents into her part as she clenched her fists , resting her hands on her knees.

He hummed. 

Poor baby, he thought fondly. . When this night was over he would shower her with kisses. Giver all the affection. Cuddle the fuck out of her, brush her hair back and make her feel so, so , good. 

But the night was  far  from over. 

He glanced at her companion.

Yugyeom gave him a smile and nod, went back to talking about art or something. 

Sera had her eyes fixed straight ahead, glassy and unfocused. 

He leaned over to whisper into her ear.

“Don’t forget...You cannot cum.” 

And then he sauntered back over to his place near the wall, before slipping his fingers into his jacket and turning up the tempo for her. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Was fun catching up, Sera... I’ll text you, yeah?” Yugyeom gave me a light hug and I stared at him, slightly teary eyes and about a second away from collapsing into a heap on the floor. 

I was sore and tired and a little out of my mind. The fireworks had lasted fifteen minutes.

It had felt like a year. 

And I hadn’t even watched them because I had kept my eyes screwed shut, concentrating only on not cumming, because if I did, not only would I literally drip all over the chair , but I would likely scream loud enough to wake the dead. 

Jungkook had turned the toy off when the show ended but it had done nothing for me...in fact it felt worse because the lack of stimulation was even worse than the steady thrum of the toy against my walls. 

Jungkook looked entirely unaffected as he watched me bid good bye to Yugyeom and it was only when he had driven away that he lightly took my arm.

“You okay baby?” He gave a me a slow smile and I glared at him through wet lashes.

“I won’t go anywhere without you again. I promise. Please just get this out of me.” 

He cooed, pulling me into a hug. 

“Alright angel. I believe you. Come on...” 

He led me to the large black Palisade , grabbing the keys from the valet.

“Get in the back seat.” He prompted. 

I nodded, too out of it to even question it. I climbed into the seats and sat down, whimpering when the toy moved inside me, shifting in deeper. My clothes were damp , almost soaking wet and my thighs trembled. 

He glanced at me.

“Can you hold on till we get home?” He asked  gently.

I stared at him, unseeing. Tears filled my eyes and spilled over.

“Please.” Was all I could get out. 

“Fuck, okay baby. Hang on.” 

Jungkook drove quickly, pulling out of the hotel premises and into the road. But instead of taking the left like he usually did, he took a U turn, picking a side road that led away from the city’s bustle . 

I gripped the seats as he drove in further away from the crowded city light , only blinking when he took a right into secluded side road, empty except for us.

I stared in confusion as he parked the car , turned off all the lights  in the car. I watched him climb out of the front seat, slamming his door shut before prying mine open. 

“Lay back for me baby. Up against the door.” He said gently. And then when I didn’t move he climbed, in all but lifting me up and settling me down till, I was leaning against the door, staring down at him.

He didn’t waste any time, spreading my legs, and pulling my panties off before pushing my knees up and apart. 

“Gonna eat you out.” He growled and my eyes flew open, the first pang of lucidity hitting me. 

“Wha-Wait...your...there’s...inside, there’s....” I couldn’t even say it. 

“My cum? Yeah... i know my cum’s inside there...” Jungkook laughed, fingers gripping the base of the vibrating and twisting it just a little bit. “ i know angel, and now I’m gonna lick my cum out of your sopping wet pussy..” 

Jungkook pulled the vibrator out of me and I sobbed at the gush of wetness that dripped out of me. But it didn’t spill, because he chased the wetness with his tongue, curling the hard length of it inside me, scooping up every last drop of the filthy mess inside me, taking it all into his hot, wet mouth . 

He hummed a little before pressing a thumb to my clit, rubbing the nub till I began quivering already way too overstimulated to experience anything but a throbbing pain disguised as pleasure. I stared at him , vision swimming as he crawled to his knees on  the back seat, head bowed because of the car’s ceiling and I watched him fumble with his belt, pulling out his cock and lining it up against my entrance. 

He drove straight in, without any hesitation, leaning over me till his face was just a little away from mine, staring down at me, cheeks a little puffed. He fucked into me with a force that shook the car on its wheels, the large vehicle somehow shaking like a leaf from how hard he thrust into me. I felt like my body was on fire, breath getting punched out of me with every thrust of his cock inside me and I could only whimper , fingers curling and uncurling on the seat as I rode the high of being fucked into incoherency. 

Jungkook grunted, hipped my waist hard used one hand to rub my clit harshly. 

And then he bought his other hand up to slip two fingers into my mouth, prompting me to open my mouth. The digits slipped in , rubbing the flat of my tongue before pulling out. 

I stared wordlessly, as his fingers slipped down to cup my jaw, squeezing till I opened my mouth wide. I stuck my tongue out instinctively and he groaned. 

Jungkook gave me cheeky little wink, eyes flashing red before he opened his mouth, spitting the wet mess of his cum and my juices right onto my tongue just as he pulled back and drove into me, his cock going so deep I saw actual fireworks. 

I went completely still, the sheer filthiness' of the act and the force of his thrust driving me straight over the edge , even as he groaned and kissed me full on the lips, tongue swooping in to swirl the mess on my tongue all over, his fingers gripping my hair as he fucked me harder, chasing his own pleasure now. 

My body hummed, exhausted, drained, completely wrung out and wrecked. 

I went limp as he gave one last thrust, spilling into me again. 

He was panting against my neck as he came down from his high and I raised a shaky hand to gently stroke the back of his head as he shuddered against me.

When he pulled back to stare at me, brushing my damp hair off my face he had a smile on his face. 

“Did you enjoy the fireworks baby?”  He whispered.

It took me two whole minutes to even remember what he was talking about.  

Author’s note : 

Jungkook sure knows how to get her attention back on him doesn’t he? 

@ladyartemesia        @veronawrites   @alpaca1612     @bonyg    @unseejuice21  @sppvjj     @ggukkieland     @tae-by-tae      @blr1004      @yoongichild    @stussyjeon  @jellybearo  @sumzysworld   @carolsummerlove

@bunniechoon

@preciouschimine    

[binxyu]

Struck with anxiety, you couldn’t bare the idea of losing Juyeon. You had already lost someone so dear to you before him and you continued to live that moment over and over again. So, when Juyeon got home late again you couldn’t help but feel a little pissed off.

>>Pairing: Lee Juyeon (dom) x fem!reader (sub) | idol!juyeon x mentally ill!reader

>>Word Count: 2.7k

>>Genre: Oneshot / Requested / Smut & Angst

>>Warnings/Kinks: Arguing, aftercare, breast play, cervix kisses, cockwarming, creampie, hair pulling, marking, mentions of death by car accident, oral (receiving), praise, seperation anxiety, shower foreplay, and unprotected sex

It had been an entire day since the man had left and all you could do was stare.

Stare at the door and hope he’d finally walk through it.

You had tried to text and call him to no avail. To no response.

“Come on Juyeon... please fucking answer me”, your hands shook as you gripped your phone tightly, flashbacks of the night a few months ago going through your horrified mind.

The car had hit your own so harshly that it caused the small car to go into a tree, instantly killing the person you had loved so dearly before Juyeon.

And, now, all you could do was imagine Juyeon in that same seat. Covered in the same blood. Laying on the same death bed.

Maybe I’m cursed. Maybe I shouldn’t be loved.

You knew deep down that was irrational. You deserved it just as much as anyone else.

You had simply been in the wrong place at the wrong time. You were not even the one driving your car at the time.

But, somehow, your brain always convinced you of the worst even if Juyeon had already reassured you that he sometimes got too busy to answer and his schedule was highly susceptible to change.

Dreariness took over and you gripped onto Juyeon’s hoodie that was over your body, hoping it would somehow calm you or reassure you he was okay. But, that wasn’t the case and all you could do was stare.

As tears started to go down your cheeks, you felt a wave of exhaustion come over you.

Was it from the lack of sleep or the crying? You weren’t sure.

Before you could sercum to that exhaustion, however, you heard the door open softly.

Your eyes immediately opened and you got off the counter you had been sitting on in the kitchen.

“Baby! I’m home finally”, you couldn’t tell if you were more relieved or pissed off, but Juyeon’s heart shattered a little when he saw you come out into the hallway. The sleeves of his hoodie were stained from your tears and your face was red from them as well.

“Hey hey, I’m okay baby”, he started to walk towards you after setting his bag down and closing the door. You shook your head at him, a gesture saying you didn’t want him any closer.

“And I’m glad about that but you know I’m like this. I’m broken. You have to let me know you’re okay! Juyeon, I thought you were dead!”, you hugged your own body, looking for any comfort as you cried harder. Your body shook from the intensity of it all.

Of course Juyeon knew that. He was your friend at the time and had been by your side in the hospital after the accident. After you found out you made it out alone.

“I know. I know ba-“, you cut him off with a harsh voice, one he had barely heard before.

“Then why didn’t you?! What was so important?”, something in Juyeon snapped before he could keep it together. He hated people yelling at him. It hurt his pride.

“Work! I was fucking working so you could just stay home and keep mourning! Y/n, do you ever think that maybe my entire life doesn’t revolve around you?!”, you flinched from the bitter words and how loud he was yelling. Never had Juyeon yelled at you.

“I-“, a defeated whimper came out of you as you fell to your knees, your body finally giving out just as your mind had, “I know... I’m so sorry” the red that Juyeon had seen before cleared up as he softened. You sounded so desperate and defeated.

“Baby, you need to realize that it wasn’t your fault. None of that was your fault”, Juyeon got down on his knees beside you and reached out his hand to touch you but you scooted away, causing a sigh to leave his mouth.

“I can’t... everytime you’re gone I always just think I’m cursed and you’ll leave or worse. Just... don’t leave me. Juyeon please”, your voice cracked as you saw the lights from the other car flash before your eyes, a scream erupting from your throat.

Flashbacks always happened when you were scared or stressed. It was worse than any nightmare you had ever experienced.

“Shhh shhh, I’m here. It won’t get you baby. I’ll make sure of it”, he finally managed to wrap you up in a hug and you buried your face into his chest, tears soaking through the thin fabric of his shirt.

“P-please”, your hands clutched his shirt desperately, as if he’d disappear at any moment. He was the only reason you remained sane and you couldn’t live without him.

“Look at me”, he gently cupped your cheeks and you looked up at him, making him frown at the sight of all the tears on the skin. He rubbed them away with his thumbs lightly and looked into your eyes.

“Breathe and then look again, okay baby?”, sniffles filled the room as you tried to breathe and calm down, taking the breaths with Juyeon as he showed you. Then, you slowly looked to where the lights had been to only see the door that you had previously been staring at.

“Thank you”, it was all you could force yourself to say and Juyeon simply nodded, stroking your hair. You turned your head towards him again and admired him as you always did.

“I’m so sorry for what I said before. You need time to mourn. I understand”, you smiled softly at him, the tears stopping at last.

“It’s okay. You’re right. I need to move on eventually”, the words were harder to say than you would’ve thought. You were still upset with him. That wouldn’t change for at least a few hours. He should’ve called you.

You needed to know your only light was still alive and well.

“We’ll do it together, okay? No rush”, Juyeon nodded and gently pecked your lips before he held your thighs and stood up, making you giggle. You wrapped your arms around his neck and gave him a quick nod, a sign that you trusted him to help you.

“Okay, we can work on things together. Just... promise me you’ll send me a text next time?”, you sighed and nuzzled your face into his neck, the strong scent of cologne filling your nose.

“Baby, I won’t promise it because I make mistakes but I’ll do my best”, somehow his response had made you a little upset, but you nodded with a simple “okay” and he let you down. You gripped onto his hoodie and decided to take a shower.

You knew Juyeon always took a shower when he got home and somehow you decided it would be fitting revenge to take that luxury from him.

The warm water hit your skin and it washed away any tears still remaining on your cheeks. While, you must admit, you were still upset with your boyfriend, you felt better. He always at least did his best for you and you knew that.

You honestly didn’t hear him even open the door to the bathroom before Juyeon’s arms were wrapped around your middle, causing your back to be pressed against his chest.

“I’m sorry. I really am. I wish I could do more for you”, your heart broke a little at how weak and desperate he sounded, his voice tickling against your ear.

You remained silent and that made Juyeon’s sigh impossibly louder, a sound of defeat that you thought meant he’d leave you alone until his hands were gripping your waist and turning you around. Your body became pressed against the wall of the shower, Juyeon’s hands pinning your wrists.

The wave of arousal that went through your body from the action was enough to make you forget all about your previous frustration with Juyeon.

“I knew that would get your attention”, you knew he had noticed the slick wetness going down your thighs because a playful smirk came across his face.

“Hey- no sex to make me forget about it!”, you finally snapped out of your little trace and wiggled against Juyeon’s grip to which he just chuckled.

“I would never-“, he dramatically gasped, faking that he had taken offense from the statement, “I’m going to have sex with you so you’re stuck with me and we have to talk it out” you blushed from the words and Juyeon smiled.

“You’re so cute. So, can I?”, he asked softly, not wanting to pressure you in any way if you were truly upset with him.

“Yes you can”, you quickly responded and Juyeon kissed you gently, removing his hands from your wrists so he could hold your thighs. He lifted you up with ease, settling you onto his shoulders with your back still pressed against the wall.

The feeling of his breath against your core made you whimper, his hands moved to your ass as your thighs closed around his head slightly. Juyeon looked up at you as he licked a strip up your folds, his tongue lapping at your clit.

“Oh fuck!”, you moaned out, gripping his hair as if he was going to stop at any moment. Juyeon chuckled against your clit at how desperate you are, sending vibrations through your body.

“You’re so beautiful baby. Such a good girl”, he hummed and the praise made your cheeks flush bright red as your hips grinded against his tongue. Juyeon kissed your clit and then moved his tongue down before he pushed it into your soaking cunt, curling the muscle against your walls.

Juyeon knew your body better than you even did and before long his tongue was thrusting up against your g-spot, his nose pressed against your clit. You moaned his name louder, your grip on his hair tightening as you felt the knot form in your stomach.

With a few more thrusts of his tongue, you came undone onto his tongue and he licked up the juices, humming delightfully at how good you tasted.

“You okay?”, Juyeon looked up at you as he took his tongue out of you, causing you to feel disappointingly empty. His smile grew, however, when he saw your pupils blown out, a clear sign you wanted more.

“I’m okay. J-just... I want you. I want you inside of me”, Juyeon nodded, his erection growing harder than he thought possible from your needy words. He started to leave kisses on your inner thighs and sucked small marks there, making your thighs look like an abstract painting of possession.

But, you knew Juyeon had done it to reassure you. So you would know that you were his and he wasn’t going to leave you.

“Let’s take this to the bed, okay?”, Juyeon slowly put you down, your legs wobbling from your previous orgasm. His hands held your waist to support you as he turned the shower off, deciding that you two would have to get clean later as he dried you off with a towel.

“Hey, Juyeon?”, he let out a quiet hum to let you know he was listening, “I love you” he paused and looked at you. Your eyes were elsewhere, staring at the floor nervously.

You had never said those words to Juyeon before and he never expected you to say them with such confidence and clarity.

He cupped your cheeks and you looked back at him, your eyes saying a million words to each other before his lips pressed against your’s passionately, a kiss that said all that needed to be said.

He loved you too. More than anything.

“I love you too. You know what?”, you were going to mumble a “what?” back but you didn’t get the chance too before Juyeon picked you up again, your legs wrapped around his waist, “fuck being dry”. You giggled as your wet body pressed against Juyeon’s.

He walked out of the bathroom and gently laid you down on the bed, moving to settle between your legs. You were about to say you were freezing as the air hit your wet skin but Juyeon had already noticed, getting a blanket and putting it over both of your bodies.

“Are you ready?”, Juyeon always asked, knowing you were more than just stretched when he went inside of you. It always felt like your first time together and he needed to make sure you were okay.

“I’m ready”, you nodded and bit your lip as Juyeon kissed your breasts, sucking on the skin softly to make more marks. He kept sucking as you moaned, a pleasant distraction as he lined his cock up with your throbbing hole.

His hands held your thighs and spread them wide, positioning them to be pressed against your chest as he slowly pushed himself inside of you.

The stretch burned as your walls wrapped around his cock, the pulse of your pussy matching the throbbing of his dick. The tip had finally made it to your cervix once he was all the way inside, as it always did.

Juyeon kissed your face all over to help calm you, knowing it may hurt. Eventually, the pain became pleasure, causing your thighs to shake.

“Y-you can move now”, he nodded, his wet hair falling into his face a little as he started to thrust in and out of you, slow motions allowing him to feel every part of you. To remember it. To treasure it. To treasure you.

“Baby, you feel so so good”, the praise caused you to arch your back, feeling his cock press against your cervix. The pain mixing with the overwhelming amount of pleasure he was giving you. It was perfect.

“You feel good too baby. Amazing!”, he smiled as you moaned out the praises. He pressed a soft kiss to your forehead as he started to move faster, his hips pressing against your thighs.

“I promise you’re all mine, okay? I won’t leave you. I love you so much”, Juyeon’s reassuring words filled your head, fighting off any negative thoughts you had had prior. You wrapped your arms around his neck and brought down his head to kiss him, a beautiful sign of gratitude as you moaned into his mouth. He kissed you back just as intensely as he moved your legs up onto his shoulders.

You pulled away as the new angle had your head thrown back, eyes rolling back in satisfaction as his cock hit the sweetest spots deep inside of you. You could already feel your second orgasm building up.

“Right there! Please keep going there!”, Juyeon groaned and nodded, holding your legs still as he pounded into that spot over and over again. Your vision went blurry as you tried to hold back your orgasm, clenching around Juyeon repeatedly.

“Cum princess. You can cum”, he whispered the words, trying hard to make them come out clear as his own orgasm approached. You both came together, your cum mixing within you and causing a warm sensation to build up in your belly.

Juyeon didn’t pull out. Instead, he simply laid beside you, moving your leg to be hooked around his waist where he could keep his cum inside of you with his dick. You felt pleasantly full and warm.

“I don’t think you’re allowed to leave me after that”, you laughed and Juyeon chuckled, shaking his head as you rested your head against his chest.

“Definitely not”, he kissed your head and you smiled, a smile that truly felt genuine for the first time in the past few days.

“But, really. I can’t live without you”, you whispered but Juyeon still heard it. His heartbeat was fast against his chest and you felt your own match it, a rhythm taking place between the both of you.

“I can’t live without you either. We’re in this together”, his hands ran through your hair in a soothing manner.

“No matter what?”.

“No matter what”.

[longitudinalwaveme]

Arkham Files: The Flash (Wally West)

Hugo Strange: From the patient files of Dr. Hugo Strange, director of Arkham Asylum. Patient: Wallace “Wally” West, also known as the Flash. Session One. So, Mr. West, how are you? 

Wally: Let’s go over the situation I’m in, shall we? My wife and I visit your creepy, Gothic asylum-perfectly legally, by the way- to make sure that Bruce Wayne is okay, and you get us arrested on bogus charges of trespassing. Then you pull strings to get me stuck in Arkham Asylum while I’m awaiting trial, and now you’re trying to have me declared legally insane so that you can lock me up in here for good. How the heck do you THINK I’m feeling? 

Hugo Strange: Your hostility is unnecessary, Mr. West. I am trying to help you. 

Wally: If this is your definition of ‘helping’ me, I’d hate to see what you do to people you want to hurt. Seriously, did you go to the Zoom Academy of Making Things “Beeetttteerrrr”? 

Hugo Strange: I am nothing like Mr. Zolomon, Mr. West. 

Wally: I’ll say you’re not. Hunter...he’s sick. He doesn’t know what he’s doing. But you? What’s your excuse? 

Hugo Strange: I do not need an excuse, Mr. West. You may not realize it yet, but you-and all the other costumed vigilantes-are doing more harm than good. 

Wally: What do you mean, more harm than good? I’ve had my powers since I was ten years old, and since then I’ve done my best to hold to the promise that I made to Uncle Barry: to use my speed only to help those in need, to combat evil-and never for my own personal gain. I haven’t been perfect at it-I’m not as selfless as Uncle Barry, and I’ve got quite a temper-but I’ve tried. I’ve really, really tried. 

Hugo Strange: Let’s talk about your Uncle Barry, shall we, Mr. West? 

Wally: Why? So you can twist my words and use them to make him out to be some sort of misguided lunatic? Not gonna happen. 

Hugo Strange: Mr. West, I assure you I bear no ill will towards Mr. Allen. Obviously, you bear a great deal of affection for him. I simply wish to know why that is. 

Wally: Because he’s a hero! He’s brave and loyal and honest and kind and good. He cares about everybody. He uses his powers to protect the weak and help the poor and defend the helpless. He became friends with Albert Desmond when nobody else would’ve given him a chance and got him his job at S.T.A.R. Labs, and he’s tried to help Mick Rory get the treatment he needs for his pyromania, too. He’s raised billions of dollars for charities, and he’s helped to save the world more times than I can count. (Pause) And he does all that while also working for justice as a police scientist! 

Hugo Strange: Mr. West, the exploits of Mr. Allen are well-known. I was asking you why you, in particular, are so fond of him. 

Wally: Well, he did marry my favorite aunt. (Pause) More importantly, though...as a kid, I really needed a hero, and he….he was my hero. My parents barely knew I was alive, except when I did something that inconvenienced them. When that happened, my dad would call me names or hit me, and my mom would wail and cry and guilt-trip….and then they’d go right back to obsessing over their own problems or arguing with each other. I...I felt like I was all alone, except for Aunt Iris. She was the one person in my family who really seemed interested in me, and she also had this awesome job as a reporter in a big city. She was really cool, but because I lived two hours away from her, I didn’t get to see her very much. (Pause) When Uncle Barry first became the Flash, I didn’t know who he was...but I idolized him. I was his biggest fan! I was even the President of the Blue Valley Flash Fan Club. (Pause, laughs) President and only member. The other kids thought he was cool, but they weren’t as invested in him as I was. To me, he represented freedom. 

Hugo Strange: It sounds as though you were a rather lonely little boy, Mr. West. 

Wally: Yeah, I guess I was. (Pause) That’s why I was so excited when my folks sent me to live with Aunt Iris in Central City during the summer when I was ten. And that’s when I first met Uncle Barry. Like I said, I didn’t know he was the Flash yet, so at first I thought he was...well, honestly? Kind of a dweeb. But then he told me that he knew the Flash and could introduce me to him. I was so excited, I probably could’ve inhaled an entire shoe. Anyway, Uncle Barry used his super speed to change into the Flash and act like he’d been waiting for me to arrive, and that’s when I met the Flash. He was everything I’d dreamed he would be. Even though I had been a little bit of a brat to him as Barry Allen, he treated me with respect; like he was happy to meet me and have me around, and it put me over the moon. Eventually, he started to explain how he’d gotten his powers, and that’s when it happened: lightning struck twice. I was doused in the same chemicals he’d gotten his super speed from, and I gained access to the speed force. It was the best day of my entire life. Besides the day I married Linda, of course. I became his sidekick, and from that point on, he was like a second father to me. He laughed at my stupid jokes, got me ice cream, took me on field trips, played games with me….all the things I dreamed of having my dad do with me. Eventually, he told me his secret identity. It was shortly before he and Aunt Iris got married, and I was ecstatic to learn that my favorite aunt was going to marry my hero. I was the ring bearer at their wedding, and from that point on, Uncle Barry and Aunt Iris basically raised me. They helped me through my parents’ divorce. Uncle Barry taught me how to balance a checkbook and apply for college scholarships; Aunt Iris helped me get my driver’s license and taught me how to really notice when other people were in need. (Pause) If it hadn’t been for them, I...I don’t know what would’ve happened to me. Maybe I’d be one of Captain Cold’s strays right now. 

Hugo Strange: Mr. West, let me posit a question to you. If your uncle loved you so much, why did he put you in a costume and allow you to fight dangerous criminals? You became the so-called Kid Flash at ten years old, and by the time you were eleven, you had already faced the Weather Wizard, Captain Cold, and the first Mirror Master-to say nothing of your garden-variety gangsters and thugs. Surely, a responsible adult would have ensured that you stayed far away from such violence...and yet Mr. Allen seemed to almost thrust you towards it. 

Wally: (Annoyed) Thrust me toward it? Are you kidding? If Uncle Barry hadn’t allowed me to be his sidekick, I’d have struck out and done superhero work on my own. I wanted to be just like him, remember? If anything, I thrust him into letting me fight criminals. (Pause) Besides, it wasn’t like he was just letting some random kid fight crime. I had super speed, remember? The chances of my getting shot were virtually nil. And the Rogues have a thing about not hurting kids. I wasn’t in any particular danger, especially not with Uncle Barry watching out for me. 

Hugo Strange: Mr. West, you obviously are unaware of this, but your uncle is a very sick man. 

Wally: Have you been listening to anything I said? Uncle Barry is the best man in the world. If that makes him crazy...well, I don’t want to be sane! 

Hugo Strange: Mr. West, I understand that this is difficult for you, but you must face reality. Your uncle was a very eccentric, very lonely man. He had few friends; most of his life was absorbed in his work. He always wanted to be someone special, but he knew that slow, lazy Barry Allen was no one important. Like you, he idolized a superhero-in his case, the Mystery Man known as Jay Garrick, and, like you, he wished that he, like his hero, was special. When his metahuman powers were activated by the lightning strike, his mind, already fragile from years of being mocked and looked down upon by his peers, shattered. He decided to use his powers to emulate the hero he had read about and idolized as a child, so that he could finally be special. Eventually, his antics drew the attention of other, even more damaged individuals, thereby indirectly inspiring the debut of all the costumed oddities that both you and your uncle spend so much time playing cops and robbers with. And then he met you. Another lonely little boy who wanted to be special. When you got your powers, he saw a chance to expand his fantasy world; recklessly endangering you. He may have been deluded enough to call you a sidekick, but what you really were was a child soldier. No wonder your life was sent into such a tailspin when he was temporarily lost in the speed force five years ago. Without him around to help maintain the fantasy that he had indoctrinated you into, you were lost, and the only solution you could think of was to take up the role that he had once filled. You are not a hero, Mr. West. You are a sad, deluded child; just as your uncle is a sad, deluded man. But I will see that you get the help you need. 

Wally: (Furious) That’s a load of bunk, and you know it! I don’t know what your game is, Dr. Strange, but you’re not going to get away with dragging my uncle’s name through the mud! 

Hugo Strange: Mr. West, your loyalty to your uncle is misguided. He is a dangerous vigilante, one who took advantage of your innocence and loneliness to turn you into yet another costumed freak. What he did to you was wrong, and it is my duty to make sure that you, and the rest of the world, realizes that fact. 

Wally: (Very loudly) Don’t you talk about Uncle Barry that way, you filthy liar! (Stands up rapidly; knocks over the chair he was sitting in) 

Hugo Strange: Mr. West, I would advise you to refrain from such open displays of hostility. Otherwise, I will have to recommend that your children not be allowed to visit you, for the sake of their own mental health. 

Wally: And how do you think it affected their mental health to have their parents locked up on phony charges, huh? 

Hugo Strange: Neither of you were fit guardians for them, Mr. West. I understand that having them separated from you was upsetting, but it is for their own good. You and your wife obviously love them, but you are too ill to properly care for them, and your wife was only enabling your behavior. It was simply not a safe environment for the children, so they have been removed from your home until such time as you have been cured and can properly care for them. Two generations of costumed vigilantes is quite….(Hugo Strange is frozen solid) 

Capt. Cold: And he’s got the nerve to call us crazy. Really, accusin’ you an’ your missus of being bad parents? I seen how you dote on those kids, West. Only a nutjob could think you were unsafe for ‘em. 

Wally: Captain Cold? 

Capt. Cold: The one and only. You ready to bust outta this joint, kid? 

Wally: Are you seriously asking me to help you escape prison? 

Capt. Cold: Sam got Lisa and all the guys out already, and I’ve pretty much already escaped, kid. Just figured I’d be nice and get you outta here, too-before the Doc decides to give you a lobotomy. (Freezes and breaks Wally’s metahuman power dampener) Besides, Central City is furious over what happened to you and your missus. They ain’t exactly gonna expedite you back here. 

Wally: All right...but as soon as Iron Heights gets rebuilt, I’m taking all of you Rogues straight back there. 

Capt. Cold: I wouldn’t have it any other way. (Pause) C’mon, kid. Let’s blow this popsicle stand.

[lyallblacklupin]

Now that all is over.

TW: Implied Sexual Assault/Nightmares.

Voldemort is killed with all aspects which is how the Second Wizarding War has ended. Fortunately, Sirius Black and Remus Lupin have survived. They have a godson to look forward to make up for the lost times, the world is serene and ill-free, and especially, they have each other. Life cannot have been any sweeter.  However, one miserable night, Sirius jerks out of the worst nightmare he has ever seen in his life. He is screaming and looking anywhere for help but Remus Lupin, who has been sleeping beside him. Will Remus be able to calm him down without having to touch him, or even come close to him?

There are a lot of things Remus Lupin should be thinking right now, which included his indecisiveness for accepting the job Dumbledore has offered him again, now that the story of Voldemort had ended once and for all. Also, the fact that he needs to move out from Grimmauld Place for the sake of his-boyfriend? Fiancé? Lover? He doesn’t understands what they are, but he knows that they are certainly not teenagers anymore. They had endured wars, losses and especially, ducked down from their own deaths, together. They finally have another chance to live, and this time it is without the fear. The fear that had been looming like their shadows since they can remember. This was THE chance.

However, as Remus exchanges the bill with the cash the red-headed girl is giving him for the Oscar Wilde’s poetry—which becomes a good distraction because the girl looks timid and strongly reminds him of Lily Evans picking up poetry from the Hogwarts for him, then she would smile at him with a teasing glint in her emerald eyes when it was Wilde’s queer poetry—he is stuck with his brain flickering the image of what happened today morning at half past five when Sirius jolted out of his sleep, running away from nothing but Remus.

“Sirius, honey—“

“NOOOOO!” Sirius’ eyes were screwed shut and he was pulling his hair like a madman, squirming in the most corner of their bedroom, with his knees glued to his chest as he quivered violently. Remus didn’t know what to do because this was something that he had never experienced in their togetherness. Sirius did have the tendency of having frequent nightmares even in Hogwarts, but never once he had pulled Remus away when he had reached and took his trembling body to tuck it against his own. He didn’t even need to ask his permission which was evidently clear that Sirius could recognize his presence without even looking him. However, this time Sirius’ wide eyes were staring him and yet he was shrieking when Remus inched forward to touch him. All of this was giving Remus only one answer: The nightmare was about Remus.

“Okay, Sirius, I’m not touching you, I’m not coming to you, see…” He steps back and sits on his bed across the very scared looking Sirius sitting on the floor. He pretended that didn’t have assume the reason behind Sirius’ behavior, looking very calm, “Did you have a nightmare, love? You can tell me, I’m not going to hurt you. I promise you, Sirius—“

His words died in his throat and suddenly something very heavy settled on his chest because Sirius is shaking his head.

“Don’t lie.” Sirius whispered and Remus thought that all of his surrounding was turning upside down. He hadn’t felt so helpless before. It had never been like this. Sirius had always been too tactile with him, no matter what. He couldn’t do anything, he was running out of ideas and strategies to deal with the situation. His mind was ringing and he started feeling nauseous as if some vial is refluxing from his stomach. His fisted the bedsheet and squeezed his eyes shut. He tried to call out Sirius but he could hardly hear his own voice when a certain ringing sound is somewhere around him. He could tell nothing except the regrets and the what-ifs that were screaming in his head: What is happening to us? Are we falling again when the chance is finally here? Why now? What if Sirius had dreamt that the wolf has killed him? What if Sirius has now realized that he was bound with a monster? What if Sirius has believed that nightmare? He shouldn’t have been with me! He deserves more! Someone who is hundred times better than me! What will I do without him? And again? Weren’t those twelve years enough for us? Why isn’t the universe a little merciful on us?

And then what came out from his mouth was a sob. His body was shaking as it  racked through him. He manages to breathe as he lifted up his head and there was Sirius looking at him with his tear-stained face, inching forward towards Remus’ legs by the bed. Remus wanted to throw caution to the wind and embrace him with all his strength and love, but he had to be very gentle to not make him flinch. He carefully raised his hand, not breaking his eye contact with him. Sirius nods hesitantly. It broke Remus’ heart to see the doubtful face of his lover. His fingers touched the skin of his arm, and fortunately there was no hint of discomfort in his face.

“What’s happened, Sirius? What did you see?”

Remus deliberately jerks himself out of the flashback because what Sirius explained him after that, was not failing him to shudder every time he plays that memory in his head. He realizes that he has to go to the therapist he has been seeing since a month. He likes Dr. Holly Meyer, and she knows about his relationship with Sirius. He thinks that she was the right person to talk.

His shift at the bookstore ends at quarter past two as he hurries for his appointment.

     ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Does Sirius have any past trauma related to rape or any sexual assault he has experience from his loved one?”

“Umm, no, he never mentioned.” Remus replies to Holly’s question. But he highly doubts that Sirius was never sexually molested by his family because one of the days at Hogwarts, when they were dating, he saw an angry looking bruise on Sirius’ hip which jolted him to his cores. However, Sirius never talked about it and neither Remus had the audacity to ask him who did that to him.

“Remus, have you ever done something which has terrified him? Any physical gesture or…I hope you know what I am talking about. Something that might have prompted that memory out of him, which also might have influenced him through this nightmare?”

Remus felt sudden surge of heat beneath his cheeks, and he doesn’t know how to answer. They haven’t physically interacted with each other in a while. The last time he can remember is when Sirius gained health after being in comma for five weeks when Bellatrix had hit him with a very complex curse at the Department of Mysteries. They were reunited in Grimmauld Place after the healers discharged him, both of them brimming up with emotions as they tried to express their undying love for each other. After that blissful moment, they got too busy with the approaching war, that they could only spare time for quick snogging and whispering ‘I love you’s incase if they never see each other.

“No, we haven’t…I mean didn’t-we didn’t…” He was not looking at the doctor because Remus could feel her smiling at him. “But why me? Why was it me in the dream doing those horrible things to him?

“Remus, dreams can be quite deceptive, and not to mention our mind has the power to take shapes of our fears the most terrifyingly in our dreams.”

Remus is speechless, and he is feeling something ugly erupting in his chest. He is quite precise about it. It is guilt. For not taking care of Sirius’ mental health.

“Remus?” Holly calls out very softly. Remus looks up sheepishly, despite the burning sensation creeping his neck and cheeks. “The case is quite clear here. Sirius has something in his hearts of hearts that he isn’t telling you. Something that hasn’t just left him ashamed or traumatized but also he is quite uncertain if this is something he should talk about. I assume that he is not giving it the importance to discuss this with you. And at the same time, you are not giving him the attention he wants from you. You two have been through misfortunes that has left you both listless and empty. You need to fill each other with love and happiness. Any love gestures will do. Let the other know that you are here for them in every possible way.”

Remus feels like his legs are giving out, even though he is sitting on a very comfortable armchair.

“Go, get your man. He needs you. He just doesn’t have the heart to bear loneliness. He is suppressing himself for you because he think this is what you want.”

No, this is not what I want! He makes a mental note to himself. And how could I not want Sirius? Remus knows that he is lying to himself about the war being the only reason for their lack of physical contact. He knows that there has been lack of communication which has followed the current problem, landing them here.

“I shouldn’t have left him alone in that house.” Remus mumbles.

“No, Remus, you did the right thing.” Holly retorts gently, “This is what he needed. To think straight with himself and be sane. You being there would have been too suffocating for him. Clearly, you needed someone to put sense in you. Your welcome.”

She is smiling amusingly, and Remus can’t help but agree. He is leaving when Dr. Holly calls him out and he turns to her.

“Say, Remus, what flowers does your better half loves the most?”

Roses. It is an automatic reply like he doesn’t need to think for even a second. Red Roses. Very cliché Sirius Black. Remus bites back a chuckle and tells her.

“Oh boy, Remus, you have a hopeless romantic in that house sulking alone, and what you are doing to him is brutal.” She is grinning at him, and he is quite grateful of her for not scolding him because he suddenly feels that he deserves it. He was too distant while being next to Sirius. He would much rather prefer to take responsibility for all of this, and make things right between them.

He apparates in front of Grimmauld Place 12, clutching a bouquet of fresh red roses. He grimaces when the scent fills his nostrils, and the idea of being above forty and doing such gesture is making him nervous. He enters the house, and suddenly stops in his track to find that the hallway is not dark anymore, it is kindled up by so many candles and enchanted stardust floating in mid-air, taking various beautiful colors. For a second, he thinks he is somewhere else. Maybe 11 or 13 Grimmauld Place? But then Sirius emerges with a pop, wearing an apron, his hair is neatly tied in a bun. He is also wearing black robes, and he has shaved but there are dark circles under his eyes.

“Hey!” Sirius walks towards him and he is saying a lot of things with the weak smile on his face, but Remus is staring him with utter fascination. He is suddenly feeling very young to realize that Sirius can still make him fluster with nothing but looking like that. Remus cannot let out a word from his mouth, but then he is broken out of his trance of swooning when he registers those silver orbs are widening, and then glistening. Remus feels an unexpected panic rising in his stomach because now tears are streaming down Sirius’ cheeks. And before he knows it, Sirius has crashed his lips on his. Remus cannot help but kiss him back. His damp is skin rubbing his, and they both rests their forehead against each other.

“Thank you.” Sirius whispers, pressing a kiss on his nose. Remus has forgotten that he have brought roses for the love of his life until Sirius is taking them, which is when he realizes the reason for why Sirius started crying suddenly. A weak grin appears on his lips, and Remus realize that he has never felt so happy in a longest while. “You remembered that I like roses.”

“Of course, darling.” Remus says teasingly, reaching forward to capture Sirius’ lips again, but then Sirius is laughing merrily which instantly warms Remus’ heart. Even so, he leans further and kisses him a little more earnestly. Sirius laces his arms around him, and Remus takes their height difference as a benefit to scoop him up in his arms.

“Moony…”

“Yes, love?” Remus nuzzles his nose against Sirius’ cheeks, as they stumbles in the nearby drawing room.

“I’m sorry about today.”

Suddenly, the awkwardness returns.

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” Remus says, “It was a bad dream, Sirius. I know that you love me, and I love you. It’s enough and we should be forever together and we should probably get married and have a new life and live in a country or something far away from everything and all and—“

Sirius is gawking at him, dumbfounded, and Remus realizes that he is rambling. He wants to slap himself right now. He might have ruined the night he is intending to make the most opportune.

“I mean…I—Sirius…” He knows that he is still scared. No matter how much the therapist has tried convincing him, he knows that no one can convince him completely, but Sirius Black. He wants to walk past the layer of no communication, and he does.

“Sirius…I can never hurt you. I can never even imagine of hurting you that way. I certainly have hurt you emotionally in the past, and maybe I still am, and if you feel like it then please talk to me, tell me if I have hurt you. But I have never hurt you physically, Sirius. I have never. It is worrying me. Have I done anything? Don’t fear, Sirius, I promise you that I am not walking unless you order me away.”

Sirius slightly shakes his head at the end of Remus’ statement. He cups his face and places a lingering and soft kiss on his forehead.

“It is you. The real you.” He whispers against his skin, and it confuses Remus. “Remus…It was not you in the dream. It was you in front of me but this…” Sirius ran his hands on the latter body, squeezing his arms with fondness swimming in his eyes, “this feeling of you, your arms, these hands and…just you... were not  in the dream. It was him. The same feeling.”

“Him?” Remus knows where this is going. He already has his suspicions.

“My father.” Sirius’ reply doesn’t fail to make his eyes instinctively wide. The thought makes him shudder and Sirius slips away from his embrace, looking miserably lost.

There is one question that is still not planning on leaving his mind and he feels he needs to ask this from Sirius, no matter what the answer, and he does.

“Why still me?”

Remus expects that he will receive a very disgusting reply from Sirius, or a glare, or maybe he has completely ruin their night and Sirius will be shutting him out for good. But—

“I came face to face with my boggart the other day in the ministry.” Sirius replies, looking straight in his eyes. Remus can recall that Sirius’ boggart was his mother when they discovered in their third year’s Defense against the Dark Arts class. However, Sirius must have read his mind when he continues, “It is not my mother anymore.”

There is a brief, tensed silence between them.

“It was you.”  Remus’ heart suddenly stops. He fights to keep a poker face. “You were there looking at me with disgust and…” He can see that Sirius is struggling through his words as if they are causing him physical pain. “…you were looking at me with such hate and you said you were leaving me because you were tired of me. You…you have never looked at me like that…”

Tears are spilling from his grey eyes.

“You have always looked at me with warmth and humbleness, but that image of you is not leaving my mind. It is there and it is making me believe that it is true, Remus, because I don’t deserve you. You are so worthy of love, I am not. I was never worthy of love. I drove you mad in our relationship. I betrayed you once, and then made you believe that I can betray you twice. But you…you never did anything like that. You compromised yourself for me, in every way. You dealt with me for a very long time, and I won’t blame you if you don’t want to deal with me anymore. It would hurt. So much, because for me, it’s hard to imagine my life without you after everything we’ve been through, together.”

Remus is numbly standing, just looking at Sirius’ face flooding with tears. He feels like his heart is breaking and mending, breaking and then again mending, back and forth. He wishes internally that Sirius’ words may leave his heart mended, because he knows he cannot deal with another heartbreak, another loss, or another tragedy.

“Know this,” Sirius comes close and touches his wet cheeks, which is when he realize that the tears are also silently rolling down his own face. “…that I love you, Remus. I know you can’t hurt me. You’ve never because you have a pure heart, Moony.”

This is when Remus doesn’t take anymore. He shoves Sirius in his arms and sobs in his shoulder. He feels Sirius relaxing into his embrace because he is placing feather-light kisses on Remus’ exposed neck.

“I’m so sorry. I am so sorry, Sirius.” He doesn’t know for what he is exactly asking his forgiveness, but he knows deep down inside his heart that it is for everything that has happened in their lives.

“But no,” He pulls out to face Sirius, desperately reaches his hands to intertwine with his, “I am not leaving you, not because I can’t but because I don’t want to be away from you. I can never be tired of you, Padfoot! And I can’t be surer about that. You think I compromised my comfort for you? That was not a compromise. That was my love for you. And it still is, here. I never regretted our relationship because of you. I did once because of myself because you had to deal with me, my cursed and poverty-stricken life. I am nothing compared to you, and yet you want me. How can I not love you? How can I disgust you? Or hate you? It’s something that can never exist when it comes to you. I don’t think I loved anyone like that except for you. I still want you, only you. I love you, a little too much, please believe me.”

Sirius has his forehead pressed with his, as he murmurs against his cheek, “I believe you, Remus.”

They kiss and they kiss for Merlin knows how long. Remus is suddenly yanked back into one of his favorite memories with Sirius, when they were at Hogwarts and it was their seventh year. He remembers that those days were Christmas holidays because they were fooling around in their dorm very peacefully, with no fear of James or Peter interrupting them. The both lovebirds were the only ones who didn’t leave for their homes. The erratic breathing, the electric excitement in their bodies, the eagerness to explore each other’s mouth is something Remus can distinctly recall from that day, at this very moment because it feels just the same as if they are seventeen again.

He reaches for Sirius’ robes to unbutton them when Sirius pulls back gently.

“Wait,” For a second, Remus thinks that this is not what Sirius wants before he smiles romantically, “I hope you have guessed why I am wearing an apron?”

“You cooked?” Remus gapes at him that makes the other laugh gleefully. That laugh makes his heart flutter again like happiness was bubbling out of him. Sirius nods at him.

“I thought I should make up for disrupting your morning, and I know you must have taken a lot of stress at work because of me. So I made your favorites.”

“You didn’t have to do this, love, I know cooking is not something you like to do.”

“Wrong!” Sirius gasped dramatically, “I love to cook for you! And besides, you bought these roses for me…” He picks out the bouquet, sniffing its scent, admiring the handiwork, and smiling the entire time as he brushes his fingers around the rims of each petals of the roses. Remus just stares at him like that. He could see the pink flush appearing on Sirius’ cheeks, and he thinks to himself that this is the most scenic view to look at. He suddenly recognizes that all of his exhaustion has dissipated from his body, and he is very much looking forward to the rest of their night.

“Come on, first dinner, and then we’ll see.” Sirius winks, taking him to kitchen when Remus stops him gradually.

“Tell me you are not frightened of me, are you? Be honest with me, Sirius.”

“I was never, Remus. I was frightened of being alone. My own mind was playing tricks on me. But not you, never you.”

Remus sees his eyes are promising.

“Promise me that you will talk to me, about anything like we used to. Just like the old times.” 

“Just like the old times. I promise, Moony.”

Sirius’ eyes returns the glimmer, and they are shinning like they used to before war, or Azkaban. Remus feels the contentment spreading in his heart and comes to a realization that it is all he have been yearning for.