#i believe all of my problems would dissapear if i got to touch his hair

[hellmothekingoffish]

his hair. it looks like marshmallows. it looks like feathers. it looks like clouds. i bet it would be an otherworldly experience to touch it. this man was given the Softest Hair ever

[bobsie]

Happy birthday Asahi

Asahi's birthday special

Genre: fluff

Prince au

It's a rare thing to miss Asahi's birthday January first, the first day of the new year and on this day the celebrations are huge not mainly for the new years but because it's the prince's birthday.

The small country would be awake for a week throwing carnivals with different foods, games and there would be plays with toys or people, musicians would be performing music everywhere and sometimes random people would start dancing on the street, the decorations were all over the streets, the music was so loud and the children laughter was filling the air

It was very great

Asahi was never a big fan of him being the prince and having to carry the burden of all those people and the country on his shoulders but his birthday week was the only week that made him happy that he was the prince

Because of him people would forget about their problems for a day and enjoy their time with their families and children

Asahi has been always a very soft and caring person which his father hated because the crown needs someone to be so tough so you can make decisions without feeling bad or guilty which was the total opposite of Asahi

Asahi Azumane was known between people for his kind heart, his love for children, for his people and for his country

He was loved among most of the people and even if there were some who hated him for his too kind heart and saw him not capable of being the next king that didn't stop them from celebrating

Today was the big day Asahi's birthday and because of the that he got up early to do so many fittings for a suit in his opinion luckily this was his last fitting for the day and he got his friends to help him instead

Of course there was a ball today a huge one where the higher ups are invited from the country and even from other countries because Asahi is turning 18 and Asahi wasn't a fan of that especially that there was a bigger crowd this time and he HATED crowd but that wasn't his only problem

"Asahi san you're so lucky not only does all the country celebrate your birthday but you get to dance with a princess this time everyone will be watching you dance together and you might fall in love"

"Noya you know Asahi is nervous about this don't make it worse" Daichi told Noya quickly when he noticed his giant friend flinch

Yes Asahi was too worried about the princess he has to dance with, he knew who she was and what she does in her country and he admired her so much for that but still meeting new people terrified him and not only that he'll have to have your body close to his and this made him even more nervous especially because of his feelings

Yes he never met you before but what he heard about you made his heart beat faster whenever your name was mentioned

"C'mon Asahi we know about your feelings for her you must be excited" Sugawara nudged Asahi on the side a little to hard that Asahi winced in pain

"C'mon guys what if she didn't like me? Or what if i stepped on her feet" Asahi said fixing the buttons on his shirt

"Asahi you have been learning how to dance since you were able to walk I think you will do great" Daichi reassured him

"And why won't she like you you're the prince" Suga glared at Noya as soon as he said that and Noya realized what he said he was about to correct himself but Asahi beat him to it

"I don't want her to like me because I am the prince Noya that's why I am nervous if she will like me I want her to like me for me not for my position"

"I am sure she will like you for you Asahi"

"Yeah it's really hard not to like you when you have this personality don't worry about it"

Meanwhile you were a special guest in the Azumane palace for the week but you haven't even met him or even took a glance of him and so Asahi's close girl friend along with some maids were helping you in your dress that was brought to you from the prince himself, you were excited and nervous  to the ball that was happening in an hour and a half

"Kiyoko do you really think he'll like it?" You said looking at your dress from every angle on the long mirror

"You look beautiful y/n I am sure you'll take Asahi breath away"

"You really think so?" You turned to Kiyoko smiling and she met you with her beautiful smile

"I know so y/n you'll have an amazing night today with Asahi"

"Thank you Kiyoko I hope I can gather enough courage to confess today even though he might reject me but I won't see him again so it won't matter if I made an embarrassment out of myself"

"You won't believe me now we're losing track of time and you still have to do your hair"

It was now the time for the ball both of you could hear the music playing announcing that the ball had started and that the crowd was waiting for both you and Asahi to come down

Both of you on top of the stairs opposite to each other you had Kiyoko by your side and Asahi had his friends next to him the people next to you dissapeared when the song changed making you two walk down the stairs each step you took made both your hearts beat faster and louder each step made you two see each other more clear each step made Asahi's breath go away as he saw you more clear and how stunning you looked in that dress and how your hair was styled each step you took made the butterflies in your stomach go wild from Asahi's sight in the suit and how his hair looked so good in a bun

Each step made your feelings grow bigger until you met in the middle of the big ballroom

Howl's moving castle theme played when you two bowed in front of each other Asahi taking your hand with his right hand and putting his left hand around your waist pulling you closer a movement that sent shivers down your spine

You both swayed to the music melting into each other's touch moving along with the music eyes never leaving the others it was like you two were alone in this world

Asahi's touch was so calming it made you feel safe and protected for some reason and his giant hand was holding your small one so gently it was like he was afraid to break you

As the song continued you grew closer to each other now laying your head on his chest and him laying his head on top of yours taking your scent in

Unfortunately the music stopped into a faster beat song after the loud cheers of the crown which made you two break apart from each other but Asahi walked closer to you bringing his head closer to your ear

"Mind if I take you somewhere" his voice made your legs weak and sent shivers down your spine it was like music to your ears

"I don't mind" Asahi smiled brightly when you answered him so he quickly held your hand and walked you out through the crowd until you were alone in the garden

"This is my hiding spot I come here whenever I need peace not even my friends know about this I hope it's fine if you don't tell anyone about it"

"Well I don't think it will matter since I don't live here"

"I was kinda hoping you would" his answer surprised you it made the blush take over your face as it did to his

"You look so beautiful in that dress"

"Thank you whoever bought this has taste" you said as you spined around showing off your dress in front of Asahi with a smile on your face which made Asahi chuckle

"I am glad you loved it but it wasn't bought I just told them said"

"It wasn't bought then?" You gasped when you put one and one together

"I am lucky to have all the maids like me because I can do my favorite hobby without them telling my father so when I knew you were coming I made that dress for you I hope you don't find that weird"

"It's not at all oh my god it's so sweet I.. I never thought you'd go through all that just for me"

"And I would do even more for you"

You two paused looking at each other the moon reflecting on you two making his chocolate eyes shine even more and it made your eyes sparkle

Asahi moved closer to you taking your hand in his before he started talking

"Y/n I know what you do to your people I know it's not the real you 100% but I am sure you're as kind as you seem to be and if you don't mind it I want to get to know the real you and I want you to know the real me too"

You chuckled before answering him "I'd love to Azumane san I was actually planning to ask you this because I really like you"

"I really like you too y/n and please call me Asahi"

"Ok Asahi"

"Y/n can I kiss you?"

"Yes please Asahi"

Asahi got closer to you and put his hands on your face he had to lean down a little while you had to lean up you both were nervous and a blushing mess until your lips touched and it felt like magic

It was beautiful, sweet and better than you thought it would you always read about it in your books but Asahi's kiss can't be described

"Happy birthday Asahi"

Happy birthday to my favorite ace to my comfort character Asahi Azumane I wish he has the best birthday in the haikyuu world

I made an Asahi edit here

[zuffer-weird-girl]

Plz i need more papa dabi with his little girl! They're so cute! Can i get dabi with a preggo s/o? At first he doesn't want to be inhis baby's life but when his s/o is involved in an acciedent where the baby had to be taken and put into an incubator he runs at high speed to the hospital and wants to see his little girl! Just imagine him sticking his hand into the incubator and the baby grabbing it and he cries? The s/o didn't survive the acciedent tho :(. It's ok if u don't want to write this..

Mentions of abortion and dabi is toya theory

He laughed.

The bastard had the nerve to laugh when you spilled the tea... when you took all of the courage in your being to tell him taht you were carrying a baby.

His baby.

Suddenly he went to look at you, his smirk slowly dissapearing when he saw your expression.

"Wait, shit-You're serious?" He asked out of no where and you almost snapped.

"Of course Im serious Dabi! I'm pregnant!" You almost cried out, knees almost giving up on holding your form as a billions of thoughts went through your boyfriend's head.

"... we can't." He breathed out, dedperation coming over his eyes but his face still hold onto the same resting bitch expression of his "We can't kept ... whatever the fuck you're carrying."

"I'm sorry but what?!" You exclaimed on horror "How can you even say that? Dabi I-"

"Listen." He said between teeth "We can't have a kid, okay? I can't have a kid... I'm no good for you for fuck's sake, imagine for this thing growing on your-"

"Don't you dare call our child a thing, Todoroki Toya." You growled, not backing away when he glared past your soul for using THAT name on him.

"Don't test your luck now dollface. Or even myself can get rid of this problem we got in." The words slipped his tongue before he could stop them before he felt a huge sting on his stiches and right cheek.

He hissed a bit and looked over at the woman he loved for years... completely broken and absolutely terrified of him, yet a hand still on the air to prove to him she indeed had slapped him.

Well, he deserved it. He couldn't lie.

"Listen..." you sobbed and he could feel his heart shattering "If YOU don't want to be a part of this baby's life, be a better father than yours was... that's alright, but I AM having this baby Dabi. Whether you liking it or not." You cried but still manage to stay with your gaze locked to his.

"(Y/n)..."

"No. If you don't want this kid, then you won't want me then, since I am having this baby."

He snatched his coat before grabbing the handle of the door before looking at you dead in the eye, words spilling like the venom of a snake.

"I should have fucking pulled out when I had the chance then huh?" He slammed the door right after, fighting with himself to prevent him to come back when he heard you falling and collapsong with cries in your apartment.

~

Nine months have passed since then, and after all the shit he had been through, this was by far the worst time of his life. He couldn't raise a kid while being a villain, he was already aprehensive on entering on a relationship, yet... you were the only one able to enter his heart and break the barriers he worked so hard to build ever since his childhood.

"Yo check it out! Disgrace!" Spinner's loud voice echoed on the room as he pointed at the Tv. A car accident aparently as some heroes showed their false selfs off to the reporters while some hurt pregnant woman was hurt and...

He jumped from his seat, turquoise eyes widening so much that his staples hurted like a damn bitch. But he couldn't care less to his pain, he couldn't care less at hearing shigaraku and the others asking him where he was running of to.

No, he couldn't care about a fucking thing when his doll was the one injured.

Wearing his disguise while running he almost sey on fire someone blocking his way as bis legs almost created wings from how fast he was running. His heart was on his ears as he manage to follow the ambulance.

Bjsting on the hospital he was easily barried by the security and some nurses.

"Get the fuck out of my way before I burn you pieces of trash to crisp." He said nonchantly but glaring through his glasses as he showed his palm on fire.

At the sudden scare of them he jumped and stormed his way until one ghard holded onto his shoulders.

"Young man you cant go on there. That woman is on a surgery right now. Between life or death situation."

"Bullshit I saw that woman kicking ass far better than All might, let me enter bastard." He was at the verge of shouting as some other securities came to help contaon the villain.

"Listen, family is usely allowed to wait on another room but-"

"For fuck's sake, I AM THAT FATHER'S KID!" He shouted in ager as some flames erupted, scating the poor workers as they let them in at least on the waiting room.

Boucing his knees fervently, he flinched when a doctor came to talk with him with a frown.

"Im sorry sir. We could only save your daughter... but the mother suffered a lot of loss of bloss."

He felt like screaming... vomiting? He didn't know... he had lost you. He cjrsed under his breath shakily before slamming his fist on the wall... his stiches coming out and blood of his being spilled on the wall and the floor as the doctor watched silently.

He couldn't even fucking apologize for being an ass to you...

He felt a comforting hand on his shoulder but he growled and shrugged off anyway. The doctor, not taking it too personally, decided to spoke up.

"I understand your state of mind... but if you wish, your daughter is on a incubator. Safe and sound, you can go see her without a problem, just ask the nurses and they will lead you there." The man spoked before leaving the room, letting Dabi scream all of his wtath and destroy the room in the middle of his outburst and regret.

Crouching down on the ground, he brushed his indigo looks out of his eyes as he let out tears to slip down his eyes, to his scars then drop on his clothing.

Standing shakily up, he made his mind. You wanted to so badly have a kid, his no less... it didn't matter whose he was or what his past was about... you loved him and then he treated you like that?

He looked at the window and the sky outside to see it was about to rain... promissing to you, wherever you were, that he was not going to mess up the last remain of love that you both had.

Following the nurse without a word he almost gagged when he saw the bundle of clothing enevelopong such a small human being that had a tuff of his natural color hair. He didn't had words to deacribe on how beautiful that sign was...

You would have loved amd even cried with that...

"This is your daughter sir! Congrats! Rei is such a cute and healthy baby despite being pre mature."

His head jerked in her direction as he mouthed a what... shocked and frozen at hearing that name.

"Oh! Sorry, but before... she died, she only could say that her name was Rei. She kept saying until she blanked out.."

He looked at the girl and slowly lifted two of his fingers to touch the incubator in a mix of regret and adoration.

The nurse mumbled that she was leaving them for a while just when the baby had opened her eyes to look at him sleepily. He forgot how to breath for a second befofe he saw the baby touch her hand where his fingers where before smilling and giggling for the first time.

He couldn't control the disgusting sob that ripped out of his throat as he watched the girl smile back at him despite how he was wearing. He couldn't believe that she was a perfect mixture of him and you... but judging by the giggles... she took a lot from your personality.

"Hello... Rei."

[randomfandomimagine]

A/N: Another Cloud writing because I love him, this time pure self indulgent intimate fluff! Hope you enjoy! 😄

(that smirk killed me when I saw it in the trailer and then again in the game 😍)

Cloud Strife x Gender Neutral Reader

Nervous butterflies immediately spread inside my stomach at the sight of him. There he was, coolly leaning his back on the wall with his arms crossed and a thoughtful expression as he absently watched the ground beneath his feet.

“Cloud!” He immediately lifted his head at the sound of my voice. “There you are”

I advanced toward him, even if I hesitated when his piercing eyes fell over me. His frown deepened at the gesture, but I tried to pretend like nothing happened.

My mind worked at top speed, rummaging for the words I had so carefully chosen to face this moment. Even then, it felt impossible to speak up. My tongue felt clumsy in my mouth and my voice seemed to shake in my throat. His loud silence was only making matters worse.

“I was looking for you...” I started, positioning myself in front of him. “I need to tell you something”

Still staring at me, Cloud tilted his head. His pause lasted only a few seconds, though they felt like hours.

“What’s wrong?” His fingers grazed my arms, making me realize I was anxiously playing with my own hands.

“I, uh...” Under his scrutiny, I had to avert my eyes. Even if there was a hint of concern in his expression mixed with the curiosity. “Well, you’ll see...”

I mentally scolded myself for failing at this yet again. It wasn’t the first time I tried to confess to him, but I did hope it would be the last. I promised myself I would do it once and for all.

“Just get it over with” He told me, and I knew him enough to realize that, despite his apparent deadpan and exasperated tone, he said it to help.

“I...” I forced myself to maintain eye contact. It was a hard task, but I just spit it out. “IthinkIhavefeelingsforyouandIwantedtotellyou”

Finally, it was off my chest! The words came out rushed and I hoped he understood them, because I didn’t feel strong enough to repeat them.

He didn’t say anything at first, he only arched his eyebrows in shock. 

“Uh...” It was Cloud who averted his eyes now, frowning a little. “You have feelings... f-for me?”

“Yeah...” I awkwardly chuckled to hide the fact that my heart was racing.

“Oh...” He stirred in the spot, tightening his arms over his chest. “I see”

I cringed at how awkward I made everything. Many possiblities went through my brain to lessen the tension. Maybe pretend like it was just a joke, or...

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Cloud suddenly asked me, claiming my attention back.

“Huh?” I blinked, but he didn’t repeat himself. “Well, I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable”

He nodded in deep thought, but continued to speak after a moment. It surprised me that he wanted to dig deeper into the subject.

“Then why are you telling me now?”

“B-Because!” I couldn’t hold his attentive gaze. “I needed to get it off my chest and you deserved to know anyway, so...”

“Right... What kind of feelings are we walking about?” 

“I... might be in love with you” 

“How long have you known for?”

Baffled by this sudden talkative side of his, I dared to look into his eyes. The ocean of blue was as inscrutable as always, although I recognized something wonderful and new in them.

“Why are you asking me all these questions?” I started saying, even if the answer came to me in the middle of the sentence. “Unless...”

“What?” He tiredly asked, apparently bothered that he was interrupted.

“Unless you have feelings too” I grinned, poking his chest with a finger.

Cloud cleared his throat and found a sudden interest in a tree near by. For the first time in these minutes that felt like hours, my nervousness turned to excitement. He remained silent, although I recognized a faint pink tone in his cheeks. I would have never thought I would see Cloud Strife actually blushing. Because of me.

“I don’t hear you deny it, Cloud” I smirked, unable to contain my teasing tone. 

“Quit it” Was all he said, bowing his head down in quiet defeat. He still didn’t deny it.

“I can’t believe it!” Too thrilled to think about I was doing, I threw my arms around his neck and hugged him tight. “I should have told you so much sooner, I-”

When Cloud tensed against me and gasped at the closeness, I froze. He was always so distant, and I had just hugged him out of the blue. Panicking and immediately letting go of him, I took a step back.

“I’m so sorry, please forgive me” I shut my eyes tight in embarrassment, now probably blushing myself. “I just got excited, I didn’t mean to bother you, I...”

“It’s fine” Cloud was quick to say, and so I opened my eyes and watched him carefully. “I...”

“You what?” I stuttered, feeling a spark of hope igniting in my chest once again.

“I didn’t mind it that much...” Cloud shrugged, even if never meeting my eyes.

Moved by pure euphoria, a chuckle escaped my lips. My chest felt warm and full, even if my heart hadn’t stopped racing and I was getting light headed.

Taking a cautious step forward, I reclaimed the closeness I had established before. He didn’t flinch, and in fact slowly moved his head. His eyes locked with mine, calling the butterflies to wreak havok inside my stomach again. There was such intensity and fondness in his eyes that my knees felt weak.

“Is this okay then?” I rested my hands on his chest, watching him closely.

Cloud took a shaky breath in, but silently nodded his head. I sweetly smiled at him. The corner of his lips curved up ever so slightly. 

Carefully, I moved my hands up until they wrapped around his neck again. He didn’t move an inch. My fingers played with the shorter hair at his nape. His hands timidly fell on my hips.

“This too?” I asked again, gently squeezing him against me until our fronts touched and we were resting against each other.

“Yeah” He whispered, and his breath tickled my nose. We were so close that our mouths were mere inches away. Did I dare break the small distance?

I leaned in. Cloud clung on to me, his fingers softly sinking into my sides. Was it just me or were we both breathing heavily? I definitely felt ouf of breath.

Our lips grazed for just a milisecond, but he suddenly gasped and moved backwards a little. I tried to step away, but his hands held me tight against him.

“Sorry” Cloud shook his head, but it seemed like the gesture was more to himself than to me.

“It’s okay if you don’t want to-”

“It’s not that”

“Then...”

He didn’t say anything, only stared into my eyes. I laughed a little when I realized what the problem was. Despite all the walls he built to protect himself, I saw through them. They had turned invisible to me, even if they were still there.

Cloud was nervous too. He was scared, he felt clumsy and unexpirienced at this. But then again, so did I. We could be vulnerable together. I was willing to show him he had nothing to worry about. Not with me.

“I’ve got you, Cloud” I retrieved my sweet smile, lightly tightening the embrace to show him everything was okay. “Do you trust me?”

He nervously blinked. His gaze never left mine, and I could read the consent in it. Nonetheless, I waited for one more signal. Then he nodded.

“Close your eyes” I whispered, and he didn’t hesitate to oblige. Despite it all, he gulped, but his arms were tender around me. Strong as always, but relaxed.

I closed my eyes too, leaning in. The breath hitched in my throat when the small distance was broken and our lips touched. I shivered, and his hands immediately moved up. They reinforced his hold on me to cradle me as we passionately kissed. It was only a peck, and it was brief, but it was everything. Everything I wanted, everything I needed. Everything I dreamed of.

My shoulders tingled as we slowly pulled away. It was hard to breathe again, but in such a wonderful way. Overwhelmed with the emotions, it took me several more seconds to open my eyes.

Cloud sighed, and the little tension that lingered on his shoulders dissapeared with the air he let out. Serious and adorably concerned, he stared at me.

“Did you mind that?” I teased him, pressing my forehead against his.

“No” He muttered, and I caught a glimpse of a smirk at the corner of his lips.

It was such a gesture unlike him, but it felt genuine. Filled with secret happiness, pride and excitement. Those lips that I had just kissed slowly but surely curled up even more, and I had never seen such a beautiful sight. Not even the way his eyes were lovingly watching me as his arms never let go of me.

Tag list: @call-me-harley-quinn / @anxiouslyreckless / @xionroxas / @dancewaterdance02 / @little-faerie-artist / @x-joie-x / @honeybunhanbin / @legallyblindgamer727​ / @goodmorningawfulbye​ / @trunks-kiwi​ / @ron-sparky-speirs​ // If you want to be added or taken off the tag list for these fandoms or characters, let me know!! // Reblogs and comments are appreciated!  

[artificialqueens]

Galactica, Chapter 12 (Group Fic) - TheDane/Veronica

A/N: Hey all! Thank you so much for your amazing enthusiasm for this story. We love you. Click here if you’re looking for previous chapters (or here if you’d rather read on AO3). 💫

Last Chapter: Raja and Raven made their new engagement known, and Violet left for her much-anticipated date with Pearl.

This Chapter: Tears, misunderstandings, and a handsome stranger.

***

Violet had never felt more humiliated in her life.

The evening had gone so well at first, the two of them arriving at the red carpet, Pearl walking it while Violet had stayed behind. The prize ceremony had been amazing, their seats front and center which meant that Violet had had the chance to really see the winning designs, but then, everything had started going to hell the minute the after party started.

Violet had volunteered to go get drinks for them, thinking that it was a date, an actual real date, but then when she came back Pearl had been dancing with a girl that Violet recognized as a manager from the Calvin Klein store, the two of them making out on the dance floor.

The girl was tiny and curvy, her dress showing off her breasts, her short red hair framing her face perfectly. She was gorgeous, and suddenly Violet felt completely disgusting in her own body, too tall, too mannish, too thin. The girl was everything she was not, which made the fact that Pearl had chosen her even worse.

Shame had made Violet’s entire skin itch as she dropped the drinks, quickly making her way to the lounge, desperate to get away.

***

Violet was sitting in the corner of the main bar, doing her very best not to let anyone know she was crying.

She had stormed to the wardrobe, only to realise that Pearl had their number and that she couldn’t get her coat, the little clutch she had taken with her barely even containing her phone and a few dollars for tipping.

Violet could go to Pearl, should go to Pearl and demand to be given her coat, but there was no way she could look at the other woman without making a complete fool of herself.

“Hey lovely eyes-” Violet felt someone sit next to her. At first, she thought it was a mistake, that the stranger hadn’t actually been talking to her, but then, he continued, “how come you’ve got such lovely eyes?”

Violet snorted. She knew the stranger couldn’t see her eyes, her hair covering her face. “Did you come up with that all by yourself?”

“I did, thank you for noticing.” He replied, his voice dry but humorous. “Here.”

Violet saw a handkerchief making its way into her field of vision. It was a square of dark green fabric, but what Violet really noticed was the faded tattoos that swirled all over the strangers dark skin.

“Thank you…” Violet took it, their fingers touching for just a moment. She quickly dabbed her eyes, hoping that her mascara hadn’t run everywhere. “Not many people carry Frank Leder handkerchiefs.”

The stranger laughed, notes of surprise clear in the warm tones, and Violet felt a little bit better. It was nice to know that even though her evening had gone to shit, she had at least managed to make this kind stranger feel a little bit better.

“Can I-”  She put the handkerchief down, not yet ready to look up, but she did want to do something for the man who Violet felt like was saving her. “Can I buy you a drink?”

“How about I get you one instead?” The warmth was still there, amusement playing just underneath the deep rumble of his voice, “and when I get back, you can tell me what’s wrong?”

Violet didn’t want to talk about her problems, didn’t want to let anyone in, but before she could protest, the man had already gotten out of his seat. Violet straightened her back, pushing her hair behind her ear. She took a deep breath, readying herself to thank him for his offer, but to also let him down gently.

“I got you some water, it’s not exactly a drink, but I figured you could use it.”

Violet turned, and that was when she saw him for the first time.

She recognized him instantly.

It was the same nose, the same height, the same eyes, the same build, the exact same skin tone.

“You’re Sutan Amrull.”

“Hello.” Sutan smiled. He was wearing a deep green suit, a bottle of water and a whiskey in hand.

Sutan was one of Elite Model Management best managers and scouts. He was a legende, his ability to find potential talent and then nurture them with his golden touch was something most scouts could only dream of. Everyone who was anything in Manhattan knew him, his models longed for and sought after and for their beauty, their personality but most importantly their work ethic.

“You’re Raja Amrull’s twin brother.”

“Pleasure to meet you.”

Violet did the only thing she could think of. She snatched her clutch off the table, and tried to run.

“Hey!” Violet felt a hand on her arm. “Don’t run.”

“I-” Violet felt like she should be panicking, someone who was essentially a stranger holding her back, but she was in the middle of a party, she knew his sister, and even though he was touching her arm, Violet could barely feel the grip. “Okay.”

“I’m glad.” Sutan slowly released her, a mischievous glint sparkling in his eyes. “You’re the first woman I’ve met who knows who I am that has tried to run away.”

“I should really go.”

“At least have the drink with me.” Sutan nodded towards the bar, stopping himself as he looked at the selection, “or water, I guess.”

Violet’s night had already gone to shit, the memory of Pearl kissing another girl burned into her brain, so there was really no reason to say no.

“Thank you.”

Violet sat down, and Sutan did the same as he pushed the closed bottle of Pellegrino towards her.

“Now,” Sutan smiled, “since you apparently know my name, and who I am, can I have yours?”

“Violet, my name’s- I, umh. I’m Violet. Just Violet.”

“Hello Violet just Violet.”  

Violet shook her head, but she couldn’t help the smile that crept over her lips.

She had seen Sutan before, of course she had. He was Raja’s twin brother, and Violet had dissapeared into the background at enough cocktail hours, event openings and parties to see the two of them standing side by side, both twins acting and looking like the rest of the world ceased to matter when the other one was there.

“I-” Violet looked over at Sutan, their eyes meeting, the man sipping his whiskey like he had all the time in the world to wait for her to speak up. “I didn’t mean for-“ Violet pauser. “I didn’t intend to freak out. Before, I mean-”

Sutan nodded, a faint hum coming from him.

“And I don’t usually cry at parties.”

“You don’t seem the type.”

Violet felt a strange sense of being seen, like Sutan was playing genuine attention to her, like he was actually looking at her and only her.

“Tonight has been, no, this entire week has been…” Violet sighed. “It’s been interesting, to say the least, and I-” Violet stopped herself, a huff of disbelief coming from her. “I can’t believe I’m actually telling you this.”

“Sounds like it needs to be said.” Sutan smiled, his head resting on his hand. “I’ve been told I’m a great listener.”

Violet nodded. She could absolutely believe it, the man’s entire aura so different from his sister, Sutan almost like a warm crackling fire to Raja’s icy coolness.

“No one, especially a stunning woman on a night of joy, deserves to sit alone and cry.”

Violet laughed, but as she watched Sutan’s face, he seemed entirely serious.

“Oh…”

“Drink your water, talk to me if you want, and when you’re done, I’ll get you a car. Okay?”

Violet bit her lip. She had been on her own for a long long time. Sure, she had had the other students and the teachers at the academy after she turned 13, but she couldn’t remember anyone ever looking at her like Sutan did.

“Thank you.”

Violet had never had anyone take care of her like this, had never had anyone pay attention to her in this manner or treat her like she was something precious, worthy of treasuring, without expecting anything from her in return, and she found herself moving closer and closer, practically fitting herself to Sutan’s side before he finally finally finally put an arm around her, his hand resting on her hip.

***

Pearl hadn’t meant to get caught up on the dancefloor, but she had bumped into one of her more frequent fuckbuddies, the Calvin Klein manager a woman Pearl really enjoyed spending time with.

She had been swept along without a thought in her head, had enjoyed herself immensely  as they danced until her partner had leaned forward and kissed her, their lips meeting, the girl dominating it right away.

Pearl had enjoyed it, she wasn’t made of stone, but as they kissed, she realized that it wasn’t what she wanted at all.

She didn’t want sex and kisses from someone who didn’t matter to her.

She wanted Violet.

Pearl had pushed her away and told her she was on a date, Calvin Klein simply shrugging and catching the hand of another blonde to dance with, leaving her behind.

And then, Pearl had spent the next hour looking for Violet, had called her phone over and over again, but she was completely gone, practically evaporated into thin air.

Pearl was just about to call the police, when she spotted Violet, the other woman sitting at the bar, looking like she didn’t have a care in the world.

A man was with her, a stranger she couldn’t recognize since his back was turned to her. His arm was around Violet’s waist, the two of them caught up in a quiet conversation, Violet actually smiling, and Pearl couldn’t help but see red.

How dare she?

Pearl had taken Violet on a date, had invited her to this amazing party, and instead of waiting for her like she was supposed to do, Violet was now basking in someone else's attention.

Pearl didn’t know what to do, anger burning in her body, but instead of running over, instead of pulling Violet away, she turned around, and went right back to the dance floor.

She’d find Calvin Klein even if it was the last thing she did, and give her so many orgasms she would black out.

***

“Here you go.”

Violet couldn’t help but smile. Sutan had somehow managed to wrestle her wrap away from the check in girl, and while Violet knew his sister could change the mind of even the most stubborn person, she had gotten the distinct impression that Sutan had that exact skill as well.

“Thank you.”

Violet was just about to reach out, and take her coat, when Sutan held it up.

“Oh.”

“I hope you don’t mind?” Sutan smiled.

“No. No, not at all.” Violet turned around, slipping her arms into her coat. Sutan put it down over her shoulders, his hands resting on them for just a moment before he released her.

“Let’s go outside.”

***

“Careful.” Violet said, her voice muffled as she climbed into his car. “I’m wearing Gabbana.”

“I know,” Sutan chuckled, following right behind her. It had been the plan to get Violet a cab, to send her off on her own, but as they had stood outside, Violet wrapped up in her jacket, they hadn’t been able to find one, so Sutan had offered her a ride in his car.

He had arrived at the Vogue Fashion Fund with a date, but right now he couldn’t even remember her name, and if he was honest he had actually forgotten it the moment he saw Violet sit at the bar.

She was absolutely wonderful. Weird and unpredictable, keeping him on his toes in a way he hadn’t tried in years and years.

She didn’t seem impressed by who he was in the slightest, but she wasn’t disrespectful either, his profession, which was so often mocked, something she so clearly understood.

“Remember your seatbelt, young lady.”

“I’m not that young.” Violet looked at him, her brown eyes bright. “I’m 23.”

“And I’m 41.”

It stung a little to say it. Sutan loved his age, loved that he was an adult with a career, that he was in charge of his own life, but right now it truly sucked that he was 17 years Violet’s senior.

“So?” Violet smiled. “You don’t look it.”

“Ouch.” Sutan snorted. “We both know I’m going gray.”

Raja had been ready to kill him when he had shown his twin his first gray hairs, his sister actually hitting him while she had yelled that it wasn’t fair.

“I think you’re beautiful.”

“Beautiful?” Sutan laughed, surprise flushing over him. “You think I’m beautiful?” He hadn’t been called that since his late teens, the choice of word yet another thing that he hadn’t expected at all.

“Mmmh.” Violet nodded. “And I think-” Violet looked at him, a small smile playing on her lips. “I think,  that it would be really nice if you kissed me.”

Sutan hadn’t planned to kiss the stranger he had met in the bar, hadn’t intended for his night to end this way, but as he leaned over the seat, his hand finding Violet’s hair, he didn’t want it any other way.

***

“Bunny!”

Courtney grinned. Adore was waiting outside their favorite pizza joint, and the second Courtney saw her best friend, her steps grew lighter and bouncier. As exhausted as she was after her first week at Galactica, nothing made her happier than a day with Adore, catching up over lunch and then snuggling up on her couch for a well-deserved marathon of their favorite cheesy rom coms.

“Hi!” she cried, skipping up to her and flinging herself into her arms.

They hadn’t seen each other since before her interview, and even though they texted all the time, it felt like it had been forever since Courtney had felt the warm comfort of one of Adore’s perfect hugs. Adore squeezed her back tightly.

“I missed you so much,” Adore said, and Courtney nodded in agreement, face buried in her neck.

“Me too, baby. How are you?”

“Good! The line’s moving quickly, which is great because I am starving! ”

“Awesome.” Courtney laid a head on her shoulder, still not letting go.

“So? How was it? Tell me everything!”

Adore put her hands on Courtney’s shoulders, pushing her back to look into her face.

“Um…”

“Isn’t Fame the best? ”

“Uh, yeah, she’s-”

“She’s practically my godmother,” Adore laughed. “You’re so lucky that you get to work for her and not my sister. Who, you know, I love and everything, but she is such a hardass. But Fame is like, the nicest.”

“Right.”

Courtney had met Adore’s infamous “hardass” sister a few times in passing, while they were in college. And while she was certainly intimidating, Courtney couldn’t remember her being nearly as relentlessly uptight as Fame. Who, Courtney supposed, must be very different outside of the office.

“And she gives the best hugs in the world,” Adore sighed.

“I’ll take your word for it,” Courtney replied with a chuckle.

It seemed a bit unfair--knowing this warm and loving version of Fame existed, and that she’d probably never get to meet her. How could she miss someone she’d never met?

“What, not a lot of hugging in the office?” Adore bumped Courtney playfully with her hip.

“Unfortunately not.”

Adore wrapped her arms around her. “Awww, sorry bunny.”

“I’ll survive,” Courtney said.

They stepped up to the counter to order, then found a small table, perching on stools. Adore, as usual, immediately took a huge bite, then moaned in pain. Courtney laughed, shaking her head.

“You always do that.”

“I know! But it’s just because I love pizza!” Adore whined, sucking on an ice cube from her Mountain Dew.

Courtney giggled again, taking a sip of her root beer.

“So...you haven’t really told me anything! What’s the job like? Is it super glamorous?!”

“Um, it’s mostly like office stuff. Answering phones, scheduling meetings, errands, things like that.” Courtney picked at her pizza crust, taking a small bite.

“Well, is it at least better than the steak house?” Adore asked.

“Yeah, for sure. And most importantly, now I can stay in New York.” Courtney smiled. “Thanks for helping me get the interview.”

“Of course, bunny. I would go crazy if you left. No one else understands me the way you do.” She leaned forward and pressed a sloppy kiss to Courtney’s cheek.

“Same!” Courtney grinned back at her.

“So like...it’s good, then? You’re happy?” Adore’s blue eyes were wide with hope.

It didn’t seem right for Courtney to complain to Adore. Not after she’d gone out of her way to help her get the interview. And certainly not about her “practically a godmother.”

“Yeah! I mean, it’s been a little tough learning everything fast enough, but I think I’m doing alright.” Courtney picked at a mushroom that was falling off of her pizza and popped it into her mouth.

“Of course you are! I would expect nothing else.”

“I just really want to do a good job, you know?”

“Yeah, sure.” Adore nodded, and then gave a sympathetic shrug. “I wouldn’t really know.”

“Well, we don’t all have rich sisters supporting our music careers,” she added.

“I know, what a shame!” Adore laughed. “Speaking of which, pizza and movie snacks are on Bianca today, so eat up.”

“Well...thanks, Bianca,” Courtney said, toasting their invisible patron and then lifting the slice to her mouth for a bite.

***

Pearl was smoking a cigarette, the morning sun shining down. Violet hadn’t answered any of her texts or any of her calls even after she had returned home, and Violet infuriatingly enough didn’t even have any social media profiles she could stalk, so Pearl had done the only thing she could think of.

She had camped out on the roof, waiting and hoping that she’d bump into Violet doing her morning yoga.

Pearl was just about to give up, when the door finally opened and she saw Violet step through, the other woman stopping dead in her tracks, yoga mat under her arm.

“Viole- Hey!”

As soon as Pearl had opened her mouth, Violet had turned on her heel.

“Hey!” Pearl shouted, throwing her cigarette over the rooftop edge.

“Violet! What the fuck, dude?!” Pearl flew down the stairs, but Violet was annoyingly fast; when she finally caught up to her, she had just jammed the key in her door.

“Violet! What the hell is wrong with you?” Pearl groaned, her heart hammering away. “First you ditch me and now you’re ignoring me?!”

Violet spun around, her hair almost hitting Pearl in the face. “Are you high right now?!”

“I-” Pearl straightened her back. “No, unfortunately. But if you’re interested, I do have some weed in my-”

Pearl had hoped for a smile, a laugh, anything, but instead, Violet simply slammed the door in her face.

***

Patrick opened the door, curious as to who it could possibly be ringing their doorbell unannounced on a Sunday evening. He couldn’t imagine the wealthy divorcée who lived in the brownstone next door needing to borrow a cup of sugar. Instead, he was greeted with a very familiar face.

“Pearl?” Patrick opened the door wider upon seeing the young blonde. She looked a little rough, like she’d been hard drinking all day.

“I’m sorry! I-should have called first. I don’t know why I thought-I mean I didn’t think-”

Patrick’s heart softened, seeing the clear distress that his wife’s latest paramour was in. Patrick knew Pearl, and enjoyed her company quite a bit. She was Fame's favorite and most reliable work playmate, always happy to please her, but didn’t often come to their house.

“Is everything okay, dear?” he asked gently.

“No.” Pearl shook her head.

“Ah.” Patrick slipped an arm around her shoulder, pressing a fatherly kiss to her hair, and guided her inside. He called out to Fame in the kitchen, “Darling! Set another place for dinner!”

[sierra9595]

Misunderstood || Sweet Pea

liamsbabyxx said to sierra9595:Hi babes! I love your writings and I would like to request a fanfic of sweet pea were he thinks ur gay bc ur super close with Toni and everything but she just trying to get u with sweet pea or something? If ur not comfortable with this, I understand, would still love ur blog 😊❤️

I love this idea and I am totally comfortable with it, so here your go. I hope you like it! Don’t forget my first language isn’t English!

‘‘Are you coming or what?’‘ Fangs looked at his friend in annoyance. He was always so slow. ‘’Yeah, yeah,’’ Sweet pea answered, not really paying attention to his friend. They walked down the hallway into the cafetaria, towards the table where their friends were settled. Sweet pea’s eyes immediately found the pretty (Y/E/C) eyes he liked so much. She smiled at him, her pretty smile. Sweet pea just nodded at her, which caused her to drop her smile. She looked away instantly and he regretted what he did. She focused her attention on Toni, trying to distract herself from him. He sat down across her, on his left Fangs. 

Sweet pea did not know how to act when he’d be around her. She was Toni’s friend, probably even more than that. They were always together, always touching and Sweet pea knew very well that Toni was more into girls. So they probably had a thing, even though they never mentioned it. Sweet pea hated her. Well, he didn’t really hate her, he hated the situation. He loved how her long (Y/H/C) hair was braided on top of her head in a Dutch braid, how her pretty (Y/E/C) eyes seemed so much bigger with the winged eyeliner she made on top of her eyelid. He surprised himself that he knew how that was called, she’d probably told him once. She was pretty small, around 5′2, and he loved it. How he could wrap his arms around her if he’d ever hug her. But that will probably never happen. Sweet pea wasn’t known for being touchy, he actually never touched anyone like that. 

‘‘What do you think Sweets?’‘ Sweet pea got out of his daydream when he heard his name. ‘‘What?’‘ He asked in confusion. (Y/N) looked away, cheeks covered in a bright pink colour. ‘‘Her hair looks good like this, right?’‘ She pointed at (Y/N)’s hair. She looked anywhere but at him. Despite the fact that he felt very attracted to her, they didn’t had the best relationship. Because he couldn’t get what he want, which was (Y/N), he hadn’t been the nicest towards her. ‘‘Yeah, whatever.’‘ Was his answer. Which caused (Y/N) to stand up from her seat. She gathered her stuff together and walked away, without a word. Toni looked at Sweet pea with a angry look on her face, before she stood up as well and left to follow (Y/N). 

‘‘That was weird.’‘ Fangs stated. Jughead didn’t say a word, to busy on his laptop. ‘‘Drop it.’‘ Sweet pea said, not wanting to talk about it. ‘‘Yeah, sure. You coming to the wyrm tonight?’‘ Fangs changed the subject, wanting the tension to dissapear. ‘‘Sure.’‘ Sweet pea responded. He really needed some distraction from that girl.

Sweet pea stood beside the pool table in the Whyte wyrm, waiting for his turn. He hadn’t seen (Y/N) nor Toni since they left the table at lunch today, after they walked off. ‘’Shit.’’ Fangs stated, after noticing he lost, again. ‘’You need to practice, bud.’’ Sweet pea laughed at him. Fangs lost every single time. Normally Sweet pea wouldn’t look when the door opened, normally he wasn’t interested in who walked in. But this time he did look. And he wished he never did. Toni walked in, holding (Y/N)’s forearm, dragging her along. She looked absolutely stunning. She wore a black skinny jeans, the knees ripped open. Her feet were covered in black boots. She had a glittery tanktop on, underneath her Soutside Serpents jacket, which she earned almost a year ago. Her hair still in that nice braid. Because her clothes were so tight, he had a good look on the curves of her body and he wanted to hold her now more than ever. 

‘‘Hi guys.’’ Toni said. Fangs responded, but the only thing Sweet pea could do was look at the gorgeous girl in front of him. ‘’Woah, (Y/N), you look nice!’’ Sweet pea’s eyes glared at Fangs. How dare? Looking at his girl like that? Sweets mentally cursed himself. She wasn’t even his girl. (Y/N) felt uneasy, with Sweet pea looking at her like that. She grabbed Toni’s hand and brought her lips to her ear. ‘’I’m gonna get a drink, you want some?’’ Toni just nodded, squeezing her hand. That didn’t go unnoticed by Sweet pea, if it’d be possible, his look got even angrier. (Y/N) walked towards the bar as fast as she could, away from her friends and the angry young man.

‘‘Okay, what the hell is wrong with you?’‘ Sweet pea looked away from the pretty girl, into the brown eyes of Toni. ‘‘You got a problem?’‘ He asked, getting angrier by the second. ‘‘No, I think you do. Why do you have to act like a jerk towards her? She didn’t do anything wrong.’‘ He clenched his fists together, trying not to get mad. He would never hurt Toni, but he was just so angry. ‘‘I’m just being myself.’‘ He scoffed. ‘‘No, you’re not,’‘ Toni stated. Fangs didn’t say a thing, not wanting to be a part of this situation. ‘‘You never act like that to Fangs or me, not even to Jughead.’‘ She threw her hands up in the air while talking to Sweet pea, she seemed mad. ‘‘So?’‘ He asked. ‘‘She’s just so annoying.’‘ He mentally slapped himself in the face. That was such a lame excuse. ‘‘How can she be annoying? She never says a word to you bacause you always act like a dick around her.’‘ He closed his eyes and counted to ten. He didn’t want to lose it at the wyrm. ‘‘Then why don’t you take your pretty girlfriend and go home?!’‘ Sweet Pea hissed his words to Toni. Toni looked at him in confusion. And then, something he never expected happened. Toni started to laugh, really, really hard. ‘‘Oh my god!’‘ She laughed at him. He wasn’t just mad anymore, he was confused. ‘‘What?’‘ He growled at her. ‘’Sweet pea, are you jealous?’’ She started to laugh louder. He felt busted, but knew there was no denying. ‘’Shut up!’’ He whispered when he saw her. She was still standing at the bar looking at them. ‘’What’s so funny?’’ He asked Toni. There wasn’t a single part in him that liked this situation. ‘’Because you think she’s my girlfriend.’’ Toni wasn’t laughing anymore, she just smiled at him. ‘’Think?’’ He asked in confusion. ‘’Yes, think, you idiot. We’re not dating!’’ Sweet pea felt like she’d hit him in the face. ‘’But.. how? You’re always together.. always touching!’’ He hissed, getting no grip at the situation. ‘’Yes, she’s my best friend but we’re not dating. She has this thing for some guy, but he’s acting like a total dick around her.’’

And then it hit him. It hit him straight in the face. All those times Toni tried him to start a conversation with (Y/N), all those times she asked ‘You like her outfit?’ or ‘You like her hair?’ She didn’t try to make him jealous. She tried to get him to talk to her. All those smiles (Y/N) gave him, the ones she only gave him weren’t to be a pain in the ass, they were because she likes him. She genuinely likes him. 

‘‘She likes me?’‘ He asked, like he didn’t believe it. ‘‘Yes, you idiot. She’s head over heels for you.’‘ Toni giggled, finding the entire situation very funny. She had never seen Sweet pea like this, so confused and talking about his feelings. He never does that. ‘‘Why?’‘ He asked. ‘‘Why she likes you?’‘ Toni asked him. Sweet pea nodded in response, not able to say anything else without sounding stupid. ‘‘Well, I know from whatever she tells me that she thinks you’re extremely attractive, she likes your length because you’re so much taller than she is, she likes your raven hair because it’s the opposite from hers, she likes your tanned skin and she thinks your smile is absolutely gorgeous.’‘ Sweet pea looked at her in disbelief. ‘‘That’s what she tells me all the time.’‘ Toni shrugged her shoulders. ‘‘She also asked me if you hated her and why. I never had a good answer for that, but I do now.’‘ Toni made an attempt to walk away, towards the bar where (Y/N) was still waiting for their drinks. In just a split second he grabbed her arm and pulled her back. ‘‘Don’t tell her.’‘ He said, Toni looked at him, he couldn’t read her face. It was just blank. ‘‘You have to tell her or I will. She’s almost at the point where she doesn’t want to hang out with us anymore if you’re there because she thinks she’s bothering you.’‘ Sweet pea grunted. ‘‘Do I really have to tell her?’‘ Toni nodded immediately. ‘‘Yes, she deserves to know why you were acting like such a shithead around her. Now go.’‘ She shoved him almost into (Y/N), who just came back with Toni’s drink. ‘‘Where’s your drink?’‘ Toni asked her, remembering she said she was going to get two drinks, one for Toni and one for herself. ‘‘I think I’m gonna head home.’‘ She murmered, pointing to the door. Sweet pea panicked, not knowing what to do or what to say. ‘‘No wait, Sweet pea has someting to tell you.’‘ He didn’t know if he wanted to be glad Toni did this, because he never would’ve done this, or if he wanted to punch her mentally. ‘‘Eh, o-okay.’‘ Sweet pea grabbed her hand and walked outside, (Y/N) following him.

(Y/N)’s big and pretty (Y/E/C) eyes looked at him patiently. ‘’What do you want to talk about?’’ Her soft voice asked. Sweet pea focused on their hands, they were still holding each other. ‘’I just..’’ Pea stopped talking, not sure what to say. It was always such a struggle for him to talk about things like this. When there were feelings involved. ‘’I just wanted to say sorry.’’ He blurted out really fast. (Y/N) looked at him. ‘’For what?’’ She almost whispered. ‘’For being such an asshole.’’ He said, a little louder. There was a hint of a smile on her face, but it faded quickly. ‘’Why were you?’’ He shrugged his shoulders. This was even harder than saying sorry. ‘’You can tell me.’’ Now she smiled at him, she tried to show him that he could talk to her. That he could trust her, really trust her. ‘’You’ll probably laugh at me.’’ She didn’t get it, why would she? ‘’I promise I won’t.’’ He didn’t believe her, but he still had to tell her the truth. She deserved to know. ‘’I thought you were dating Toni.’’ He said, very softly. But he said it. ‘’And why would that be a problem?’’ She didn’t really got a grip on the situation. ‘’Because,’’ He closed his eyes and sighed, before opening them again and speaking up. ‘’Because I like you.’’ She let go of his hand hand covered her mouth with it. ‘’You like me?!’’ Her voice sounded weird. Sweet pea could only nod. A chuckle left her lips. ‘’You said you wouldn’t laugh!’ His voice a little raised. ‘’I’m sorry, but you’re so cute.’’ (Y/N) giggled. ‘’No, I’m not.’’ (Y/N) grabbed his hands. ‘’You are cute because you were jealous, because you thought Toni and I were a thing.’’ Right now he figured how stupid that sounded. He was such an idiot. ‘’You can’t deny, it’s kinda cute.’’ She cupped his face when he didn’t respond. ‘’I’m not really into girls,’’ She said. ‘’I’d rather have a thing with you.’’ And after that being said, she connected their lips. All the jealousy left his body, it was filled with warmth, with love. A kind of love he had never felt before. 

[jacquelineshyde]

That ‘70s Show Halloween Week: Day 7, Free Day.

Shit has been weird lately, Hyde thought as he arched an eyebrow at Jackie talking alone in front of the Pinciotti's porch. He blinked a couple of times, seeing as she leaned towards a non-existing person like if someone had hugged her.

God, that chick was going crazy. It was difficult to see the girl she once was in the woman standing with her shoulders up and her eyes in the ground, arms crossed on her chest, like if protecting herself from whatever enemy. It reminded him of something else. 

He walked away now, not really wanting to go inside where too many memories attacked him at once.  Mrs. Forman hadn't been up at all, which meant he had to cook again and while he appreciated the distraction the task gave him, he prefered to not be up in the house. The feeling of oppresion only made him want to puke, and his stomach could only take so much.

"Hyde!" Jackie's voice filled his ears and his brain, he knew today he'll have a headache and overthink whatever she had to say to him. "Can you do me a favor?" She asked, soon appearing in his view.

Her hair was messy, only three days ago Fez had made it green, giving them a good laugh after months of mopping around and walking like zombies all day. She didn't spend as much time down in the basement, she didn't had a reason to, and she and Donna hadn't been those supposed best friends they always said they were in a long time.

But the green hair, man, that had been a blessing. He wondered if she had nightmares about it. He wondered why he bit the inside of his cheek, a cold feeling going up his back, a voice yelling at his bull in the corner of his mind.

"What do you want?" He asked, sounding harsher than he intended. Hyde bit his own tongue, wondering why would it matter how he sounded. He hated her, he wanted her as far away as he could. So, what does it matter? 

She took a deep breath, whatever it was, was important. Her nose was red like if she had been crying, and in the corner of his eyes, he saw a lock of her hair move behind her ear without her hands moving. 

"What--?" He took the lock and she jumped like if he had tried to hit her, he walked away a few steps and watched as her eyes became bigger than normal, and he realized this was the most they had touched in months. "Sorry, It's just..."

"Don't do that." Jackie said, not sounding offended but still away from him. Fuck. "As I was saying, can you please take me to my house?"

He groaned, this girl's nerve was strong. "Jackie, your building is just a few--"

"I'm not living there anymore." She answered, not meeting his eyes. He arched an eyebrow. "I mean, my house. You know, the mansion."

"Man..." He shook his head. "Don't tell me you seriously left the apartment because of the hair?"

Finally, she looked up at his face, her eyes looking at him like if she couldn't believe his words. All this time, all these burns and bad words, and she was still surprised of his antics. Hyde wasn't sure if he found it sad or amusing, but it left his mouth feeling like sand.

And his arm aching.

His hand went directly to his bicep, looking at it with a frown. It had hurt like if someone had punched it, but no one was around. Only Jackie in front of him. He looked back at her, she had her arms crossed over her chest again and was starting to turn around, eyes fixated on the floor.

"Hey..."

"I know." Jackie murmured, but somehow he knew she wasn't talking to him. "He's an idiot, yeah. Thank you again." And she went walking away from him, not turning around, like... never.

Holy fuck, Jackie was going insane. And maybe he was, too, since he could swear someone had punched him, just like someone had pushed her hair back like Forman often did to Donna-- 

"Jackie told me she, Fez and Kelso can see and talk to Eric's ghost. Can you believe her fuckery? Hyde, we are better without her, you were always right.", Donna's voice echoed inside his head, what she had said just yesterday. Jackie must had tried to talk to their friend, and for her defeated look, none was done.

"Jackie!" He called, jogging after her even when she didn't turn around. "Come on, I'll take you there!" But she didn't listen, she turned in the corner of the street and, like he always ended up doing, he followed her.

Something stopped him to go any closer, like arms pushing him away. Hyde swallowed, taking off his sunglassed and hooking them in the collar of his shirt. 

"Forman, if that's you, let me talk to her." He murmured, hoping no one would see him. "I don't know why you are with her now, but let me--" Another punch was felt on his bicep and he frowned. "You are fucking ass..." 

But when he started to walk again, he was allowed to continue.

This time, he got to her faster, she had stopped walking as quick and seemed surprised he had followed her. Nothing to blame on her, he hadn't been exactly the best to her lately. He hadn't been himself for a year by now, not that she had to know that. Or anyone else, for that matter.

"Hey..." He breathed heavily, her fingers were white on her arms and he swallowed again, the memory of the way she had been hurting herself as she tried to talk to him in Chicago so long ago trashed his mind as it always did when it returned.Hyde shook his head again, trying to get that away from him. "I'll take you to your place."

"It's okay..." She answered, softly like never before. "I'll walk, I need it."

She did as said, passing him without problem and only stopping to tug at her bag that was going down her shoulder, but it moved alone, getting in place as she sighed.

"You gotta stop doing that, someone will see." She murmured, and Hyde followed again. Jackie turned and looked at him like knowing what he was about to say.

"Is that truly Forman?" 

She only nodded. His throat felt thight, his nose burning as he wanted to scream or lugh, Hyde wasn't sure what was it anymore. Jackie said nothing again, she kept walking away and for now, he didn't follow.

Looking at her going away seemed like the only thing he knew how to do now, ever since he didn't listen and stopped caring. Forman had told him the night before he left for Africa, the night before the accident, that all his problems were his and he had filled Jackie with insecurities none of them needed.

"This is like a disease." Forman had said, drunk as fuck and yet so certain. "You know? Because... she knows what she wants, man. She-- she, she knows." 

And you don't, you don't and you ruin her with your bullshit that should belong to only you. Love filled with insertanity becomes venom, and like that of a powerful snake, kills the fairest of the little birds, devouring their wings, silencing their song forever.

Jackie walked like if she had been beated up every day. She walked like his mother used to walk after a night of drunk Bud in the house, like Fez used to walk around jocks, and like every women ever used by Kelso walked after his five seconds of fucking, and his throat filled with vile.

Had he done this to her? Her image was almost a blur now, and then she turned in the corner and dissapeared from his sight once again. He felt sick, his nails digging hard on his palm, blood will soon get from that wound, but for now, what was left of him was already bleeding.

“Fuck.” He followed her.

[caroline18mars]

Into the night - Chapter 99

Last effort..

“Did you see her? How is she? Is she ok?” Jared came racing up to him the minute he walked back inside the house, Tom didn't even want to come back here but somehow it felt wrong not to, despite her plea to stay with her. “Yes, I saw her, but she's far from ok” Tom grumbled, he hated how helpless he felt again, being in this house where Charlotte's memory still bounced off the walls, his tense relationship with Jared, not being able to  do much for his friend, it was really getting to him. “This is fuckin' ridiculous, I'm going over there” Jared had enough, what the hell was he still standing around here for, feeling completely helpless and guilty for letting things escalate between them to this extend. “Oh no, you don't! She only asked for her medication so if you point me in the right direction, I'll go get them and give them to her” Tom snarked at Jared who stood there like he was nailed to the floor, “I'll go” Per who had clearly overheard their entire conversation, appeared from the kitchen. “Who the hell are you?” Tom frowned at the younger man who didn't even bother to look at him. “I'm her nurse, I'll go get her things” Per hurried back into the kitchen and as soon as he had dissapeared, Tom turned to face Jared, his initial anger started to crumble seeing him stand there looking completely lost, his body trembling. “Look..Jared, I'll talk to her again..I won't promise anything but I'll see what I can do to get her to change her mind, ok?” he breathed as he watched Jared's face start to gain a little bit of colour again “oh ok!..thanks Tom, just tell her I love and miss her very much..I just want to talk to her, that's all..”. Jordan plodded to the frontdoor but when she opened it, she wished she had kept it closed “Per..I just needed my pills” she breathed heavily, she so wasn't in the mood to have that creep fussing over her again, everything about that man bugged her, she couldn't quite put her finger on it, but her gut screamed to run as far away from him as possible. “Are you kidding me? You don't just need your pills, Jordan, not in your condition, you need someone to look after you, I don't think you realize the seriousness of your situation” Per pushed past Tom and headed straight for the living room. Tom could see the despair on Jordan's face even though she tried to hide it “wow, what the hell is his problem?” he hissed as he stepped inside and closed the door behind him, “tell me about it, did Jared send him along?” Jordan sighed. “Jordan?” Per put his head round the livingroom door, looking none too pleased with her, “alright, alright” she huffed but walked over to him anyway.

On the other side of the fence Noah found himself alone after his friends had all retreated to their rooms to sleep off their jetlag, and so he walked out to the garden looking for some company, he missed his aunt so much and even though his friends were all here, the only person he wanted to cuddle with and talk to now was his aunt, there was only one person he could have so much fun with and the only one that he could get into mischief and have little secrets with. She was his mommy and daddy now, no she was better than his mommy and daddy because she was always there for him, she always put him on number one and took him everywhere she went, except for now.. Jared sat by the pool, staring out over the rippling water and his garden when Noah crawled on his lap and nestled himself against his chest without saying anything, the boy just closed his eyes and held on to his big friend. “Is Victor asleep?” Jared whispered as he looked down at the miserable little human bundle on his lap, Noah just nodded, he knew exactly how the boy felt, miserable, just like him, why couldn't she see how much she meant to everyone? That stubborn streak of her, it was doing his head in, but despite his own broken heart he tried to lift the boy's spirits “do you want to go swimming?” he cradled Noah in his arms but the boy just kept shaking his head..if even swimming didn't cheer him up then it was hopeless. “Look at us..” he took a sharp breath as he put his chin on top of Noah's head “I mean, before you came along, I didn't even want to have kids, didn't even want to think about them” he got lost in his thoughts, daydreaming over his not so distant past. Noah's little hands suddenly folded around Jared's underarm, caressing it like he wanted to urge him to continue, “and now..I can't even imagine not having you around” Jared breathed looking at Noah's small fingers that were caressing the tattooed skin on his arm. “I wish I had a brother, why don't I have a brother? You have a brother, and so does aunt Jordan, he was my daddy you know, so why don't I have a brother?” Noah  was clearly thinking out loud, “Uhm..I don't know, that's a question I can't answer, that's something only your Mom and Dad could have answered” Jared mumbled, a bit taken aback by Noah's awkward question and there was more to follow. “Why can't you and aunt Jordan buy me a brother?” Noah pulled his head away from Jared's chest to look at him, “Buy you a brother? Oh buddy, you can't just go to a store or something and buy a baby..” he paused for a few seconds when he saw Noah stare at him incredulously “..do you know where babies come from?”. Noah frowned for a second and then shook his head, never in a milllion years did he think of ever having to have this kind of conversation with a 5-year old, “ok..well..when a man and a woman really really love each other, they..uhm..can make a baby together” Jared tried to keep it simple for him. “They 'make' a baby?? but how? Is it like my Lego?” Noah stared at him like he had lost his mind, “What? Lego? Oh no buddy, it's definitely not like Lego.ok, so..you know how sometimes grown ups want to have some time alone and get all cuddly and snuggly with each other?” Jared calmly said, “Just like you and aunt Jordan do? You're always kissing her and stuff, and then she has that weird look in her eyes, and you touch her all the time?” Noah nodded. Despite his misery, Jared couldn't help but grin seeing the disgusted look on Noah's face, “yeah..just like your aunt and me..anyway, after they get all snuggly, the man will want to give the woman a special gift, because she's got something the man needs so he'll put a tiny cell of himself inside of the woman's body where she will keep it safe in a special part of her tummy so the tiny cell can grow into a baby until it's ready to be born”. Noah looked at him like he had just seen an alien, “really? ewww!!! that's gross” he said in disgust, “but if you and aunt Jordan kiss and snuggle all the time, how come you two don't have babies yet?”. Jared bit his lip, what had he gotten himself into? “well, you have to both really want to, I guess, and your aunt Jordan and I..well we haven't discussed that part yet” he shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “I miss aunt Jordan, I wish she would come back” Noah nestled himself against Jared again with a sigh. “Me too, buddy, me too” he put his chin on Noah's head as he wrapped his arms around the boy again.

”Look, I know what I said about Jared earlier on and I sure as hell am not picking his side in this, but you're going to have to go back and talk to him some time, Jordan! You can't just stay and hide out here forever, there's Noah to think of too” Tom breathed exasperated, sometimes she could be so stubborn “in fact it's high time we all sat down together and talked about Noah's future and everything you put in that letter”. Jordan just felt so numb, she could hear what he was saying but she had to struggle to get the words out, “Why? I thought I made it pretty clear that I want you to take care of Noah when I'm gone”, Tom shook his head “but you're not dead and you know I can't take care of Noah!”. Jordan couldn't believe her ears “Can't or won't?” she snapped, all her hopes of avoiding that Noah got into his grandparents' claws were crumbling one by one. “I can't, Jordan, ok? Sure I want to be his guardian or a godfather or whatever, but I'm not a father figure and you know it, with my career and everything, or the lack of it, besides Jared is already doing a much better job at being a father for that little man than I ever could” Tom spat back. “Lack of it? What do you mean?” Jordan picked up on the detail in his little rant, “I quit, alright? I quit my job!” Tom shrugged, “you quit? But..Cedric..he just let you go? He told me you were his top designer” Jordan frowned. “His top designer?? We all know who his top designer was, that was Charlotte, she put the label back on its' feet, not me, I was just a copy cat..I didn't even have a fragment of her talent..no, It's something I should have done a long time ago, besides he's not even gonna care, no-one's seen him ever since you exposed him in that custody case” he huffed. Jordan didn't know what to say to that, she was just too tired to deal with it, she could literally fall asleep where she sat. “Tom, I really think you should go, can't you see she needs her rest?” Per casually walked into the room and cocked his head at Tom who in his turn looked at Jordan who was struggling to keep her eyes open “Ok, yeah..I'll..uhm let you get some sleep, just call me if there's anything you need, ok? And I'll come by with Nahla tomorrow morning, just think about what I said, ok? Please? Noah couldn't be in better hands..Let's just all sit down together tomorrow and talk about this ok?” he got up to kiss her forehead that faintly nodded but he was pretty sure she hadn't even heard him.

”Is aunt Jordan alright? Can I go see her?” Noah came running up to Tom as soon as he walked back inside Jared's house, “She's alright, but she was very tired so she's sleeping now, but you can go see her in the morning” Tom ruffled Noah's hair when the boy's bottom lip dropped in a dissapointed pout. “Jared..can we talk?” he softly said as he looked at Jared who seemed equally dissapointed “in private”, Jared just nodded and walked out into the quiet kitchen, Tom closing the door behind him. “What did she say? Is she ok?”, Tom could clearly see the tremble in Jared's hands as he put them behind his back leaning against the kitchencounter and for a second he could have sworn time had stood still and they were both whizzed back to a year earlier. “No she's not, I've never seen her like this, something's not right, Jared..” Tom breathed, shaking his head, “what do you mean? Something's not right, that's for sure, she's not here, that's what's wrong..I don't know what I'm even still doing here, I'm going over there right now, I need to see her” Jared pushed himself away from the counter but Tom pushed him back. “No you don't! It won't do anyone any good if you go up there now and throw one of your diva tantrums!” he barked at Jared “..Just calm down, ok? Can't we just have a civilized talk for once?”. Jared took a deep breath “Fine! ” he sighed, how could he possibly be calm if a thousand worst case scenarios were running around in his head? “just tell me, what's going on?”. Tom shrugged “Ok, well, it's her behaviour that worries me, I mean, one minute she's alert and upset and the next minute she's all lethargic and so drowsy like she's falling asleep on the spot, do you know if there's been any change in her medication or something? because back in London she certainly wasn't like that”. Jared shook his head “Lethargic? Jordan? Seriously? She's a goddamn hurricane and you know it! Her medication has changed yeah, but she's been taking it since the operation and she wasn't drowsy or anything then” it was almost like he was discribing someone else, she wasn't self medicating, was she? “I was afraid you were going to say that..I dunno, maybe I'm just seeing things..” Tom tried to tell himself but he saw what he saw and it certainly didn't sit right with him. “Ok, you can't just waltz in here with some insinuations about her health and then expect me to stay calm and sit by while she slips away from me? This whole situation is getting completely out of hand and I don't care what she wants or doesn't want, I'm going over there and she's going to listen, I swear, I'll make her listen” Jared raised his voice “I'm not spending another goddamn night without her”. Tom had to push him back once again “Oh sure yeah, you go over there and you go all alpha male on her, yeah that's going to make it all better, you get what you want but what about Jordan, huh? What does she get out of this besides more heartache?” they were almost nose to nose now “Listen to me, it's clear we all need to talk..before it's too late..but we can't do that if you keep lashing out at her and run over there kicking and screaming! This is the future we're gonna have to talk about, not just yours or hers but all of our future, ok? Especially Noah's, it's his future that's on the line here, do you understand?”. Jared's eyes widened in shock “what the hell are you talking about? Noah's staying here with me and that's final! She should know that, we've talked about this, what did she say, Tom? What did she say?” he gasped. “She..uhm..ok, back in London, before she left for LA, she gave me a letter..” Tom stammered, his mouth going awfully dry, “what letter? What did it say?” Jared 's heart started pounding in his throat as he watched Tom swallow hard. “Ok..uhm if you really must know, it's..uhm like a will..it said that after her death,  she wants me to to take care of Noah..” his words were barely above a whisper, “WHAT? NO, no-no-no-no-no you must have read that wrong, this is a joke right?” in his eyes  a storm was starting to rage while he shook his head ferociously. “No, it's not, I'm afraid..that's why we're all going over there in the morning to talk to her, ok? Because I can't take care of Noah..it's too..complicated” Behind them the door opened and Noah stood there, clutching his Yoda-doll tightly against him without saying a word, but he had clearly overheard them talking about him because when Jared walked up to him, he just turned around and spurted out of the kitchen again with tears streaming down his little face.

[gothambatsygirl-blog]

He's a vigilante.

Based of the characters of Gotham. Timeframe: between S3 and 4.  Selina got in some trouble with a dangerous Gotham gang. She has been feeling lost and not like herself for the last couple of weeks. Selina was captured and is being held in downtown Gotham.  Selina heard about the kind of places she was in right now. Even when living on and around the streets for as long as she could remember, Selina got reminded of possible danger in different ways. Sometimes people told stories to scare her, or like this one time, some of the older streetkids she knew, thought it was a good idea to steal money from a russian gang and were never seen again after the gang reaching out to them, "wanting to talk and resolve the problem", in a place just like this. Needles to say, Cat knew in what kind of trouble she was.  Selina put her head down. Her curly hair tickled her face and she tried to move her head so that it wouldn't. It would've gone allot easier if she had her hands to put her hair behind her ears, but they were kind of unavailable right now. The rope that was used to tie her hands together burned her skin when she moved, even a little bit. She wanted to punch herself for her sensitive skin, even if she wasn't at fault for having it. She quickly put her head back up. There was a quick movement in her expression when she felt the rope cutting some skin open on both her wrists. This situation, this place she was in, This was not like her. This, all of this, was not like her at all. 'I know how to take care of myself. How, in the hell did I get myself into this...' She thought to herself. As a matter of fact, at the exact moment of those thoughts, a little squeek noise escaped her throat. She immediately looked at the guard standing right next to the chair she was sitting on, but he didn't seem to have noticed the sound she had made.  It was a long story, but Selina had upset some people she knew she shouldn't have. She hadn't been herself, not like she usually is. Ever since she was extremely young, Selina was guarded and hesitent to trust anybody. She had to be. She rarely got herself into any bad situation. Except when Bruce is around. Was around, that is. He got her into quite a bit of trouble, which is, when you truly think about it, rather strange. You'd think someone like him or with his past would live a careful (or at least somewhat normal) life. He is guarded too, but in a different way. He wants to understand everything and has a bad habit of going too deep into research. "Understanding Gotham" he said it was about, something along those lines. Selina couldn't quite remember. 'What an idiot. Always getting himself into trouble. Stupid idiot.' She frowned. She didn't understand. She was trying to understand. Everytime she tried to comprehend her situation it sounded like the song stuck in her head got louder. Like somebody was screaming the words. Her head hurt, allot. 'I'm going to be sore tomorrow. Well, that's if I live by the end of the night.' A funny yet frightening thought. She smiled. She didn't know why. 'Somethin funny bitch?' The guy standing next to Selina bared the few yellow teeth he had left in his mouth while giving her a fake grin. Selina didn't know his name so she just called him dumb guy in her head, since he probably had the IQ score of garden gnome. 'I think...' He hummed as he bowed down to Selina. 'I think that I asked you what the hell, is funny to you-' 'nothing is funny' She quickly said. She directly stared at him. She had been for the entire time he was speaking. She told herself she wasn't scared of him and started believing it. 'Oh actually, I might have been laughing at the puns you were preparing in your head. You should do comedy.' 'You watch out sweetheart, or you'll really get hurt. I mean, real, raw pain. You ever felt that?' She looked down to the ground, then quickly back up. 'Mentally, or physically?' He cluelessly looked at her. 'Do you know what those words mean?' Dumb guy grinned. He probably didn't. The main guy walked in. Selina smiled at him. What was the matter with her? Tears stung her eyes. 'What... What is happening? Why do I feel like this?' She thought, making eye contact with main guy the entire time. She smiled again. Main guy smiled too. 'She's drunk on fear.' Selina wondered when that became a thing. Being drunk on fear. It made sense, this was the first time in a long, long time that she wasn't able to think straight. She wasn't able to control what she was thinking about. Or what she said. She normally felt like this when she's unbelievably mad. 'But the last that time that happened was when B-... a long time ago' she though. We're going to have some fun with that.' The rope around Selina's hand was cut with a blunt, broken off knife. Main guy stood her up by putting his arms under her shoulders. Her neck felt limp but her head didn't fall over. She had a dead look in her eyes. She had never, ever been this dissapointed in herself in her life. It didn't matter now though, nothing mattered. It was like her emotions were numbed, until she felt the cold blade of the broken of knife slowly being put against her wrist. Without any type of warning or hesitation, main guy slowly started making a cut in her skin. It hurt like hell. Her facial expression became a little more tense for a small moment, before completely going back to neutral. The emotions were raging in her head though. 'You feel that?' Main guy said. 'You spit while you speak'. Selina didn't know what she was saying. Main guy started laughing. 'This is the most fun part though, the insults. You'll feel out of control of your emotions and the physical pain makes it worse.' 'Try me'. Selina said. The floor under the door next to Selina creaked. She turned her head. 'I'll go' One of the other guys said. No one moved for about thirty seconds. You could've heard a pin drop. Selina smiled. Again, she really didn't know why. She guessed the silence was funny to her. The room was so quiet, she could finally hear herself think again. She breathed in. The room smelled like cigar smoke and plants, since there was poison ivy groing through the walls. It reminded her of Ivy a little. She felt a sharp, deep sadness in her stomache. 'What would that girl do without me...' She thought. Smoke, plants and... Cologne. An expensive one. One she didn't notice before. All she remembers was a scream, and the sounds of a fight. Selina felt anger now. Extreme, pure anger. Main guy had dropped Selina on the floor. She landed on both of her hands. When she lifted her head, there was a dark clothed, hooded figure in front of her. He was wearing a mask. He stook his hand out. She took it. Hoody guy had just pulled her up when main guy placed his pocket knife against her neck. 'Come on tough guy, safe her. You can do it sweety' He said mockingly. 'I've got my knife pressed against her neck'. Selina looked at hoodie guy. She didn't know what to expect. He didn't... Do anything though. He took a step back. Her eyes widened. He took another step back, another one, until his back touched the door. He folded his arms against his stomache. It looked like he was waiting for something. 'Why are you- SAFE HER.' Main guy screamed into Cat's ear. Then, for the first time since his entrance, hoody let out a couple of low pitched, raspy words. 'I don't need to.' His mask only covered the half of hoody's face. You could still see his jaw and lips. He smiled, in the most subtle and soft way. It contrasted with everything about him. It was like a light. Like one, single light, in a dark, cold room. Selina's mouth opened , just very little and she gave hoody a crooked smile. He responded with a smile. It was like an agreement only they knew of, made up in that moment. It was like, they both knew about something, something secretive, but they themselves didn't even know what it was. They just both knew. And she didn't even know who he was. Everybody stopped with whatever they were trying to do. Main guy still held the knife up to Selina's throat but wasn't paying attention to holding her. Selina successfully elbowed him in the face and punched him in the stomache. It's amazing what adrenaline can do to you. Selina was sure she had never, in her life, had so much of it in her blood. She wasn't smiling anymore. It was game time. Hoody was still against the door. No one tried to fight him, weirdly enough. Two of the guys ran. He was smirking. He didn't move. Selina got hold of main guy's knife and used the back of it to break a window. When Selina climbed out and landed on a rooftop next to the building she was held captive in, she had a clear view of the door hoody guy was standing against, only he wasn't anymore. 'Vigilante' Cat whispered. Her words dissapeared in the night sky. She stared at the stars. She had made sure she wasn't followed when she took a different and what she knew to be a more difficult-to-remember road home. Two footsteps. She knew it was him. 'The vigilante, right?' she said as she twisted her body towards him. 'What should I call you?' He didn't answer. He stood there. As silent and still as the night she had been listening to for the last 15 minutes. 'I was thinking, what to thank you for'. She said. 'I don't... I don't know what to thank you for'. He spoke, finally. 'I don't need a thank you'. 'Than what do you want?' There was a silence. Selina broke it. 'How did you know I was going to... Save myself?' 'Lucky guess.' 'You don't look like a guy who lucky guesses' 'You don't know what I look like' 'Well than show me what you look like'. 'No'. 'Why not? Is it cause you're a vigilante?' 'I'm not a vigilante'. Silence. 'My name is Selina Kyle. People call me-' 'Cat' hoody said. She looked at him. Unapolagetically, in his eyes. They were extremely dark. She couldn't tell which colour. They were brown or maybe... A dark green. 'H-How did you kn-' 'You move like one. Like a cat.' Hoody turned around, as warm as Selina has seen him once, as cold as he was now. His big black jacket moved in the wind. She smelled his cologne. Then, he jumped. 'I'll see you 'round?' 'Okay Cat.' He yelled from the other rooftop. She smiled. She knew why.

[kim-jongin-s]

프로듀스 101 Questions

found this in the tumblr tags and copied it from this post.

Who was your first favourite trainee(s)?

i chose them from their one-minute profiles: yoo jinwon, kwon hyunbin, yoo hoeseung, ha minho (can you imagine how heartbroken i was when i found out........ bc he was my #1 until then), yoon jaechan, joo haknyeon, kim seongri, lee gunmin, im youngmin, lai guanlin.

Who is your favourite trainee(s)?

my favorites ended up being: kim seongri, im youngmin, kang daniel, lai guanlin, yoon jaechan, all the boys from rbw and all the boys from brand new music + probably the rest of top20...

What are your top 3 performances?

if it’s from all the performances, i’d say get ugly, open up and never. if it’s from just performances of original songs, then open up, never and showtime.

Who is your favourite bromance / friendship?

ongniel!!! also nu’est with their kids. and seonho with everyone? and daehwi with everyone? and jaehwan with sewoon? i cannot choose lmao. they’re all so precious. T.T

Who deserved more screentime?

insoo!!! kim seongri!!!!!!!!!! im youngmin!!!!!!!!!! lee gunmin!!!!!!!!!!!! rbw !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 + all of the other super talented people whose faces we didn’t get to see for much longer than a few minutes (if lucky) in those 2 hour episodes. :(

Who would you want as your best friend?

jisung!!!

Who do you think is an underrated trainee?

kim seongri. i can’t believe how tiny of an amount of recognition he got, despite having one of the best vocals in the whole show. :(

Favourite vocal position evaluation performance?

if it is you-- or amazing kiss. 

Favourite dance position evaluation performance?

get ugly. i still rewatch it and cri evrytiem™.

Favourite rap position evaluation performance?

i’m not the person you used to know. i still wish there was a video of the full performance.. that performance left me with the deepest impression and even if minho did what is said he had done, he’s an amazing rapper. :(

What was your favourite concept evaluation song?

i’m torn between open up and never, but i have to say open up in the end.

Who is your favourite singer?

seongri. from wanna one, jaehwan. 

Who is your favourite rapper?

park woojin. but there were so many great rappers, a lot of whom where my biases, but i have to choose only one...

Who is your favourite dancer?

this is the hardest question. T.T i literally can’t choose,  i loved the guys from get ugly team but there were also people like jonghyun? OH AND DONGHAN, OMG--

Top pick(s) for meme?

jisung. also ong.

Who has the best visuals?

i’ll just choose from wanna one: kang daniel, ong seongwoo, lai guanlin, hwang minhyun and bae jinyoung. if i had to choose from p101, i could spend the whole day typing names.

Which segment did you like the best - ghost prank, arm wrestle, punch king, sports day?

sports day because i was cry-laughing while watching it.

Favourite introduction video.

it might actually be insoo’s because i love how he kept on laughing. :’D but i don’t remember much anymore.

Meringue time or hidden box? Top picks?

hidden box. i don’t even remember which ones were my favorite, but the ones that were screaming the most were the most hilarious. XD like the one with kim taemin? i don’t remember who he was up against though.

Most heart-touching moment.

when they watched the videos from the parents, and then daehwi’s mom and guanlin’s dad and sister came and everyone was just crying uncontrollably.

Most heart-breaking moment.

when the boys got eliminated and cried.. or when they realized they are about to get eliminated, like when they shaked their heads and said things like “no, i know i’m out already”. :(

Choose your squad members.

jisung, daniel, ong, woojin? idk i love the extra ones.

Who is your Wanna One bias?

.... daniel.

Who is your Wanna One bias wrecker?

too many. jisung’s the most dangerous one.

Who do you think would be a good leader for Wanna One?

jisung! he’s the oldest and he really took care of his teammates when he was leading the team of downpour. 

What concepts do you want to see Wanna One do?

i really hope it won’t be anything cute. XD jisung’s 26 c’mon save him from that.  i usually really love mature / sexy concepts, but idk how much of that we can expect when 5/11 of them are underage. something strong or funky would also be nice!

If you could add one member into Wanna One, who would it be?

kim jonghyun. no more words needed.

Super hot or Hands on me?

the performance of super hot but the actual song of hands on me.

Kang Daniel - pink hair or brown hair?

brown hair.

Park Jihoon - wink or jeojjang aegyo?

jeojjang aegyo! :D

Lee Daehwi - on stage or off stage character?

off stage! i love how much of a diva he is. :’D

Kim Jaehwan - laugh or vocals?

his laugh is amazing but i have to say vocals. i immediately noticed him because of that. i’m so glad such a talent won’t dissapear from our eyes.

Ong Seongwoo - baegopa or slate ?

슬레이트 치겠습니다! 1, 2, 3, 👏!

Lai Guanlin - swaggy rapper or maknae?

maknae.

Yoon Jisung - meme or hyung?

meme? but idk, i just love every single thing about him.

Hwang Minhyun - seonho or jaehwan?

seonho.

Bae Jinyoung - shy or confident?

confident. i loved watching him  gain self confidence. :’) 

Ha Sungwoon - vocals or dance?

vocals.

Unpopular opinion.

this season, despite all the scandals and other similar problems, was better quality than the first one, for example, all of the concept evaluation songs were super good. while the ones in season 1 weren’t that impressive. also, i think all of the boys’ overall relationship with each other was closer than the one of the girls in season 1.. i remember the girls had some tension (?) between them for a long time in the show, even in the later episodes, but for guys it disappeared very quickly. also this season was funnier bc of all the memes.

[selcouth-eunoia]

The end

Dear Misho, 

it’s me. Believe it or not. Want it or not. I’m writing to you in order to release the thoughts of mine forever and always. Get them, keep them and as you leave again - take them with you. I need to live. 

May 1st 2019. The last time I talked to you. Yet over that year behind us, you kept crushing me all the time. I’m not here to tell you how much I love you and that I want you back. I’m here to let go the past and leave. As you did. 

On 26th April, few days before we talked at last, my mom and my brothers had a serious life-threatening car crash. They are alive. But I went through so much since then. My mom had 4 OPs, my brother 2 and my little brother got away with a mild brain concussion. Since 28th February, we did not have a home. We lived here and there. The house was not ready and we had to move out from the apartment. So not only I had to switch from one hospital to other, not only I had finals at school, not only my dad and I had to sleep on the couch in my aunt’s apartment, but I started work. 

Summer came. Mom got better physically but mentally she was destroyed. So guess what - I became a psychologist. Mostly for myself because I could not help her - I only had a slight possibility to protect myself. And on top of all - you were gone. 

But fortunately, all these struggles are gone now. Mom even got her licence back the other day. Dad and I have a stronger bond since the problems around the car crash and the bad depressed and stressed situation in the summer right after the car crash. My aunt and my uncle are better now - we see each other every week as we used to. I concentrated on school and now I’m working on a project about rabies to present that in an organisation in Heidelberg - where I want to study medicine. 

Most importantly, while you were gone, I learned how to love myself. I haven’t lost all that weight yet, but I love myself the way I am right now. My face is not perfect but nobody’s is. I put a bit make up almost everyday, I workout and try to eat healthy even tho recently I developed binge eating disorder. But I’m recovering. I’ll be fine. 

I love myself for working on myself and for stopping with those depressive thoughts all the time. I try to be happy for no reason and I want my friends and family to be happy too. I found out my parents want to communicate with be but I never give them that chance. I found out that when someone loves himself it does not mean he cannot love anyone else - only then he can obtain enough happiness for himself and the rest of the world. I have a hard time at school and often I think that I won’t make it in medical school but that’s the point of MS - to be hard so you stick to it only if you really want to do it. 

Yes, I’m not writing this to only talk about me here. Back in the days, when I cried rivers for you, tried to find out why I’m annoying you all the time with reading messages but not responding on time or at all or when you made jokes I did not get and I got mad at you. Childish - that’s basically what it was. The real thing was my love to you. I loved you. 

I don’t think that I will forget you ever. I will always remember our digital love story. Or how all these almost 3 years, we never managed to hug in the summer. You disappearing happened to be always in the summer. Chen, Gabcho, your ex, the chinese girl you slept with and God knows whoever else is involved our love story. 

I would like to thank you for saying that girls like Chen are your type when we were at the beginning of our relationship (yes, it wa a relationship to me, idk about you). When you said you are thinking of Gabcho, when you preffered the company of an asian beauty instead of meeting me. When you were holding the hand of a girl less annoying than me instead of texting me. Thank you for causing that pain. Without it, I would not have found myself nowadays.

Thank you for dissapearing multiple times. Thank you for showing mixed signs. Thank you for not truly loving me. Thank you for your harsh and painful words. Thank you for givin up right the way, Thank you for listening when it hurt (when YOU hurt (me)). 

It was painful. Oh God, it was so painful. Loving someone you cannot hold, someone you cannot see, someone you cannot really take care of, someone you cannot kiss wherere it hurts him, hug whenever he’s hurt. Somone you cannot watch an anime with (it’s not that it was a problem for us back then - we’ve done that). Someone you want to spend your life with but haven’t seen for longer than 2 hours. I was jealous of your parents - not only friends or classmates of yours. Not to mention any passing by girl that had the chance to see you. I had an album with over 80 videos and photos of you. I deletet it. All the elements are now somewhere in my 5 year old google photo account. But somehow I clicked on favourite photos few weeks ago and found your pic. And I found other pictures of your graduation I hadn’t saved. I will delete them someday. I’m still in the process of letting you go. I sometimes watch Efo’s streams on twitch just to get a touch from your area. 

I have to admit that I miss you. And that I don’t hate you. But I’m indeed not sure if I still love you. And If I see you someday and have the chance to talk to you - I don’t know what to tell you. 

I have found many mental issues of mine when I was overthinking on what happened with us one year ago or better said - why it did not work between us. 

You never asked about my childhood and I’m glad about that. But I want to release it all so here you go: 

My mom and dad were separated when I was born because my dad always got late and sometimes did not even get home after work. My mom left and went to live with her sister and her husband, my grandma and Presko in Dobrich. She had to go to 3 work places because she did not have money to even buy me a gum. There was a period of time when my mom and I lived with a man named Alexander with his son. He was abusive. I remember when he pulled her in the air holding on her neck. When I was 3 years old, I met my dad and his sisters - I don’t remember these days. I remember playing every day with Presko. Then I remember how my aunt sent me to my grandma in Montana where she got remarried. I had a good time there too. Dad came to see me once again because he wanted to take me with him and go to Cyprus where my mom went after leaving me in Dobrich. I disagreed. But on that day I heard them both fighting about me. My aunt said she does not want me back and my grandma said she can’t take care of myself anymore. I felt guilty. She was tired because of me. So I agreed to go with him. He seemed very lively but at the same time so dark and fake. He showed a very scary part of him and whenever I did something wrong - he showed that dak side. Before that, mom tried to take me in Cyprus with her once but whenever she left me in any kindergarden, I started panicking that she will be gone for a long time once again. A place with strangers not even speaking my language - scary. 

Him and I left but this time we went to Balchik - to meet my other grandma and my aunts. And then his dark side came out. He started beating me. Pictures I don’t want to share. 

My mom came back then and I was still scared she will leave me with him again. It was like hell to me. But soon enough he started beating me in front of her. Sometimes she stood behind me but often she stayed still. There are situations my mom does not even know about. 

I started gaining weight. From a kid with good physical strength because my grandma used to feed me food and let me play a lot outside, I went to a distracted kid that was actually really good at school but was blamed for not being the perfect one. 

Soon enough my brother was born and I was so happy. Even tho so jealous that my mom is not looking at me the way she looked at him. I became the black sheep. 

The we went to Cyprus where I turned 9 and even today nobody wants to admit my skills in learning. I learned greek fast and almost alone, I kept up with the stuff at school even tho we did not do anything new than what I had done in Bulgaria. My dad kept beating me, even started calling me bad names. I constantly kept gaining weight. But fortunately, my physics worked for me - I was tall enough for my age and the weight I was gaining at some point started disappearing. 

Then I went to a bulgarian school at the same time. And the bullying stared. They kicked me, called me names, insulted me, spread lies about me. And then my mom found lice in my hair and since we were poor, we did not have money to buy something to kill them, she had to cut my hair short. The bullying spread in the greek school as well. I barely had friends. No one liked me, my dad was violent, my mom never protected me, I had to do a lot of her household chores, took care of my brothers and never had the chance to play with the kids. I had to study. Books. To translate them. And do chores. And look after my brother. This was the life of a kid between 10 and 12. 

Over the years, things were getting even worse finantially, all my clothes were either given by someone or we found them somewhere. We did not have a proper washing mashine, it was so hot that my parents even slept outside, cockroaches everywhere, mosquios eating us. And my little brother was born so money was missing. 

My mom decided to take my brothers and leave them at one of my dad’s sisters to take care of them and to go to Germany and start a life there so we can go there and start over. So I had to stay with my dad. He was surprisingly less violent. But something else happened... He went sexual. Another situation I don’t want to talk about. 

We managed to leave Cyprus and get back to Bulgaria. While my mom was getting things straight in Germany, my dad, my brothers and I stayed at my aunt. I missed school a lot. I just found friends, kids at school just had started accepting me, bullying started slowly disappearing. And in Bulgaria, dad became violent again. He even started calling me really bad words, blaming me for things that were happening. I was like an absorbend rag. I started hating him, started hating the bullies in Cyprus. I was 12 years old and I carried so much hate and hatred... I was listening to what they used to call me all these years and I hated myself even. I started living in the world of animations, games. It was my comfort. I hated every gilry girl, every potentional bully. I basically did not know how to socialize. 

Dad went to Germany where mom finally found us a place. And it was a wonderful time... My aunt, my uncle and my brothers. Peace. I leanred so much from them, I helped at home too and it was wonderful. But then dad came to pick us up. I did not want to go to no Germany, i did not want to meet no new class mates either learn another language. My stubborn side was gaining strengh. I became an actual tom boy. And guess what - germans were not less bullies than greeks. It even got worse. They used to put things in my bag, called me names, made fun of me. I probably hated myself more than I hated them. Because my acne, my strange hair and weirth oversized clothes were the truth. So instead of working on myself, listening to what they don’t liek and turning into what they want me to be - I concentrated on hating them. Even when a girl came to our class and we became friends. Even if she showed me how to talk to people, how to start looking after myself a bit. It was just not the right time to fully love myself. 

When I was 14, I met that guy I had pseudo sex with. He was my true love. When we were apart, I felt empty. But he was just not my guy. I started looking after myself slowly. I wanted to be fit, so I managed to keep my weight in the healthy zone. And one year later I met you. 

From that point you know what happened. No need to say a thing else. Now you at least know why I was so insecure, why I wanted you to be always there, why I was scared to lose you and why I was always offended and felt attacked. 

These are not excuses. These are the reasons why I was like that. The most important part is - I managed to develop a better self of mine. I accepted my face, my body and what I’m doing now is trying to feel BETTER, not good. Because I already feel good. 

If one day we meet again, I would like to at least have a taste of what we could have been if we have had the chance to be an actual couple. I really want to. 

But I guess there is already someone who has taken that part of your life. So I’m wishing you good luck and lots of love. You deserve it. 

Kind regards, 

Dahling.